#not just a magician (malcolm)

[anon-sect]

Eric has ten employees he supervised in his department at work. He had a level of respect for each of them. The only thing he required was the same level of respect back. But there was one employee who was a major thorn in his side. He did enough to keep himself employed, but every time he had to be corrected, he showed a lack of respect to his position. He really wanted to fix this issue to make life at work much easier.

Eric had heard of a guy named Genie who was solving financial issues but helped in other ways. He had to see if he could help solve his disrespectful employee problem. He called and set up a meeting on the next day.

Eric met Genie at his office. "How can I help you, since you aren't interested in money? Most of my clients are usually here for those partucular reasons." He asked Eric.

Money wasn't an issue currently, but an employee was. "I have this one employee that is really annoying, but I have no grounds on which to fire him. And he won't quit. I just want him dealt with where he is no longer an issue or concern for me." Eric explained his slightly strange request, wondering how a guy named Genie can solve it.

Genie snapped his fingers and a magical contract instantly appeared before him. He looked it over before turning it around for Eric to sign it.

Eric was amazed how an old looking form of paper instantly appeared out of nowhere. "Are you some kind of magician?" He asked as Genie turned the paper for him to read. "Let's just say my magic is far more ancient than some magician. Just sign and initial the highlighted areas. Also, on the bottom in the fine print, I need you to write in a name, it has to be a close friend or a close acquaintance you know well." Genie responded to his question.

Eric read and signed at the same time. He understood what was on the old parchment looking paper. The wish would be permanent with no reversal. But what confused him was that he had to provide a name at the bottom. And it had to be a close friend or acquaintance. "Why do I need to write a name down here if I have already signed?" He asked him curiously.

"You see, I don't grant wishes for free. I require something in exchange. The name you provide will belong to me as my possession. Otherwise, I won't grant it." Genie spoke his response, waiting on Eric to finish signing it.

Eric thought of who he should write in. He didn't want to put in the name of someone close to him he cared about. That would be cruel. He then had the perfect name. It was someone he knew by acquaintance really good, but was also annoying. He honestly wouldn't care what Genie did with him. He wrote in Jake on the line and handed the paper back over to Genie.

Genie looked it over one more time and saw everything was in order. He snapped his fingers, and the parchment vanished just as suddenly as it appeared. "Your wish will be granted in the morning. Just remember, it's permanent. It will not be reversed. I think that concludes our business." Genie motioned him toward his office door.

Eric left wondering how his annoying employee situation would be dealt with. He was told it would be handled by the morning. He couldn't wait to see what would happen.

The next morning, Eric took his shower as normal, but when he came out, he saw a pair of white AND1 socks with a small note beside it. He read the note: here is Malcolm. He is now your pair of socks, enjoy them as you please. Sign, Genie. P.S. there is no reversal if you should happen to feel any remorse.

Malcolm was just having breakfast when suddenly he found himself laid out in a strange place. His body was split in half, and he couldn't move at all. Nor could he physically speak or utter any sound. It was like being trapped in your own mind with no escape. He hated this feeling. He then heard a familiar voice approach. "Wow, he really did solve my Malcolm issue. He made him into my personal pair of socks. I literally get to wear him." He heard as the familiar voice laughed afterward. He knew exactly whose voice it was. It was his supervisor, Eric. Did he hear right? Was he turned into a pair of socks? He quickly realized it was his current reality when he felt Eric picked him up and slid his foot into his sock body. Even though Eric's foot was clean with no odor, it still sickened him at the thought that he was now wrapped around his supervisor's foot. He then experienced it a second time as the other sock was put on. He felt Eric wiggling his toes in him. He screamed so many curses at him and realized Eric didn't hear a single one. He was a powerless pair of socks, and Eric was his owner.

Eric loved the way Malcolm felt on his feet. He would make him his favorite pair of socks. The thought that Malcolm would be at work but providing support for his feet made him smile. The annoying employee became useful to him. The best part was that his socks couldn't speak. No more disrespectful tone coming from him, nothing but bliss silence from the only employee he had that got on his nerves. He then thought about the one whom he gave up to get his wish granted. He wondered what Genie would do with him, even though he honestly didn't have any concern for his well-being.

Jake felt strange. The last thing he remembered was being in his bed. Now he felt like he was somewhere else. He was in a dark place and wrapped around something that felt familiar. He tried to speak but found he no longer had the ability. He tried to move, but his motion was minimal at best. All the most he could accomplish was squirming motion.

Genie felt his underwear moving. He laughed at the futile attempt to escape his current fate. The wish was granted, which meant Jake was permanently his. The good thing was the guy that gave him Jake didn't even care what happened to him. But he would let Jake know of his fate. Suddenly, he had the urge to fart. He let out a long five second fart. He laughed as he finished because he remembered making the guy's face be in the ass part of the underwear. He literally just farted in his face. He really felt the underwear squirm like crazy. He laughed even more.

Jake tried to get away from the smell as an almost toxic gaseous smell bombarded his face. It was so ranchid that he would have gagged or vomited if he had an actual mouth. He realized his reality. He was underwear, and his face was at the rear end of the underwear. He was looking directly at another guy's ass and there was no escape from it. He himself was a straight guy, loves the ladies. But to literally end up on a guy's ass was the worst thought he could ever imagine, let alone it be his reality.

Genie unzipped his pants to speak with his underwear for the first and last time. "Your friend or associate Eric offered you to me in exchange for his wish being granted. So I decided you would be my underwear. The last guy given to me was turned into my favorite pair of socks. I have to tell you, you do make an excellent pair of underwear. And you absorb my fart gas well. I don't smell any of it." Genie paused and laughed at Jake as he farted again, this time it was almost eight seconds long. "This is permanent for you." He finished as he zipped his pants back up. He went and sat down to watch television. He rubbed his butt in his underwear for a bit, enjoying the fact that he knew exactly what he was doing as the underwear squirmed like crazy.

Jake knew of Eric, but for him to trade him off like that was cruel and unforgivable. That last fart was worse than the first one. Then the guy sits down and rubs his ass in his face. He would never wish this fate on any straight guy. A gay guy might be loving this, but he was hating every last moment.

At the end of the day, Eric arrived home from work. His socks had a little sweat in them. He sniffed his shoes and found his strong foot odor in them. He shook his head. He was glad he wasn't trapped in that smell all day. The thought that Malcolm was trapped in that all day amused him. That must have been torture, he thought to himself. But Malcolm's day wasn't over yet. There was one more thing he wanted his former employee to experience.

Malcolm was literally praying for death. The weight of Eric constantly bearing down on him was torture enough. It was just made worse by being trapped and surrounded by an intense foot odor that made him wish he could commit suicide. Add in tasting Eric's feet the entire day. All of this combined was a pit of hell that he would not even wish on someone he hated. Eric only spoke to him that morning. All the rest of the day, he was completely ignored. He was just treated as normal socks. He mentally tried to reach out to his friends at work when he heard their voices, but all attempts were futile. Even if Eric had let them see his socks, no one would come to his rescue. All they would see is normal socks. Only Eric knew the truth, and he wasn't telling anyone about what happened to him.

Eric put on a porn video on the TV. He removed one sock and placed it over his dick. As the video action intensified, so did his dick. Next he was shoot hot cum straight into his sock. "How does that taste, Malcolm?" He laughed as he cleaned off his dick. There was still some cum left on his cock, so he took the other sock to wipe it off. "You also make an excellent cum rag." He added. "Just to let you know, this is permanent. You will never be human again. You only exist to support my feet and be my cum rag forever. I can't reverse what's been done to you, and neither do I want to." He laughed as he placed the socks on the couch. He would wash them later so that he could wear Malcolm again tomorrow. He would wear him to work every day just to torture him, knowing he would never see his old life ever again. And no one to come change his fate. This was the best way to handle my annoying employee issue, he thought. He would have to thank Genie later on. As for Jake, he didn't care what Genie did with him. They weren't close friends anyway.

Malcolm mentally cried as he tasted hot cum that would soon dry up in his sock body. His humanity was reduced to servitude to his former boss's feet and for sexual pleasure. And there was nothing he could do to change it.

[valeffelees]

hi hi hi can you tell me more about the fairy simon au please also your baz is so pretty i love him so much

hOLY SHIT thank you—both for coming here to let me talk about this silly AU and for the compliment, drawing Baz is good for my mental health, honestly. he is just... so lovely. 😭💞

about Bazza in the AU: the story (kinda) takes place post-Watford for Baz, so he's in his early 20s; he's an art student, he's a magician, and he is still a vampire, but, Natasha is actually alive in this AU because Baz wasn't turned in the nursery as a kid, he was turned a bit later in life. Baz plays the violin still, too, but not as well as he does in canon because he stopped his lessons cold around 12-13, which was also right around when he started taking art pretty seriously. without the Mage's cuts and reforms and shit happening, the school still offered a plethora of creative arts courses to the students, and of course they're not quite like Normal classes 'cause pretty much everything ties back to magic in some way at Watford, etc., but he liked them well enough and they were enough to get him into a good program after he graduated!

about Simon in the AU: so, this is funny. i was actually editing my one fanfic, and i have this section in it that goes: "It is impossible to search the entire Wavering Wood. The environment is too thick with magic, the old and unpredictable kind that used to belong to faeries and fable creatures and all other manner of strange, lost things. Penelope says there are even parts of the Wood rumoured to be untouched by magicians. Hidden meadows and ancient groves and brooks that babble of the future, sequestered away because they never stop moving and changing, because they do not want to be found." and it planted this funny seed in my brain. in the books, fairies are like a lost magical people. Simon tells us that they wandered into the woods for a few centuries and then couldn't find their way back. and i just had this silly thought: "imagine a fairy does the opposite. wandered out, but then didn't know how to find its way back in."

the whole idea of the AU is like... this total whimsy-ass summer Simon and Baz get to spend together.

Baz comes home from school on holidays to visit his family: in winter and spring, that means he stays with his father. but in the summer, he goes to Watford to spend time with his mother (Natasha doesn't actually leave the school very often, she drowns herself in work; Malcolm sees her very rarely these days) but "spending time with his mother" is actually just six weeks of quiet lunches in her office together before Baz goes off to find a good place on the grounds to sit with his sketchbook and his Spotify until he has to go back for an equally quiet supper in her office together. and so it goes: less than a week into break, he decides to spend the afternoon in the Wavering Wood, and by chance, happens to meet Simon. a fairy that walked a little too far for a little too long, and can't seem to remember his way back to where he came from anymore.

and Simon is a fucking pest. but—he's harmless.

and he's pretty.

and Baz actually happens to like the Wavering Wood quite a lot, thank you very much, going back there every afternoon has absolutely nothing to do with anything else, lost fairies or otherwise! 😉😂

if anyone sees this and is wondering what the hell i'm on about, click here!

[atlantus]

MY TOP 10+ SHOWS BELOW THE READ MORE- I CANT SLEEP AND I WROTE THIS LIST FOR A FRIEND LAST WEEK AND IM POASTING IT

I feel like it's too complicated to make a favorites list, because some of my favorite things are objectively bad. A lot of factors were considered when judging: whether it's good, made well, acted well, written well had a strong clear poignant message, the artistry, the craft of story telling, characters, whether i enjoyed myself watching it, etc. I feel like I could have made a top comedy or animation or sitcom or whatver list but these are my FAVORITES what I think is the best thing ever

1. The Good Place

2. Avatar the Last Airbender

3. Community*

4. Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

5. Grace and Frankie

6. Workin’ Moms

7. Sense8^

8. Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

9. Insatiable **

10. The Politician**

11. The Magicians**

12. Kim's Convenience

13. Veep %

14. Schitts Creek

15. FUTURAMA

16. GLOW

17. Kevin Can Fuck Himself ##

18. Carol and the End of the World

19. Malcolm in the Middle

20. Galavant ++^

21. After Life<

22. Bojack Horseman

23. Killing Eve

24. Orange is the New Black

25. Raising Hope ^

26. Scrubs

27. Wakfu

*perhaps it's not as good as the others right behind it like production wise or story wise but it's hard to compare everything. Community won out bc it's funny cinsistently, I even like the bad seasons,

**would be higher if it was actually good, like these can't beat all these other amazing fucking shows. I love Magicians more than Insatiable and The Politician (and a lot of other things), but they are objectively better shows, everything, writing, acting, production, everything. since community slotted so high, I had to move some of these treasures lower

++I thought this would be higher

^I bet if more of this was made it would rank higher

##new obsession alert! Fan-fucking-tastic take on the genre, I bet it will move up over time. I just watch it for the first time last month and I've watched the rest of these shows multiple times (I love rewatching and rereading)

<I know it's ricky gervais but this is one of the most beautiful and accurate portrayals of grief and the anger that accompanies it that I have ever seen and it has me dying of laughter everytime I watch it. Would rank higher if he wasn't such a hateful man but it really taints the message of the show.

%would win top comedy, but this is my list of favorites?

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

11, 14, 16, 23 😌

HELLO BELOVED THANKS FOR ASKING referencing this post:

11. What was your favorite book that has been out for a while, but you just now read?

if i'm scrolling through based on ratings, i gotta go with PIRANESI!! DRIFTWOOD by Marie Brennan was also very good, and both of them are still rotisserie-ing my brainpan.

14. What books do you want to finish before the year is over?

tonight, immediately after work and walkies, i will be annihilating SYSTEM COLLAPSE (BOT AND ART MY BELOVEDS!!!)

i want to read KS Villoso's BITCH QUEEN trilogy, still, and finish DAEMON VOICES by Philip Pullman. might also fuck around and do THE SCOURGE BETWEEN STARS by Ness Brown and a short stack of other stuff on my nightstand--we'll see how far i get! Decembers Are For Reading™

16. What is the most over-hyped book you read this year?

honestly i didn't actually read that much that was massively hyped?? and things that WERE hyped have so far deserved it, so those don't count.

the one(s) i hyped most for MYSELF and then was DISAPPOINTED BY were the SKYBOUND SAGA by Alex London, which was a bummer because it SHOULD HAVE BEEN EXACTLY MY JAM AND YET!!!

23. What’s the fastest time it took you to read a book?

novellas, my beloved <3 i slammed through quite a few novellas in one sitting this year, and i read a few over the course of a couple days to Savor Them. faves are:

NOTHING BUT THE RAIN by Naomi Salman (actually fastest)

THE EMPLOYEES by Olga Ravn

LOST IN THE MOMENT AND FOUND by Seanan McGuire

THE FAMOUS MAGICIAN by Cesar Aira

UNTETHERED SKY by Fonda Lee

THE TINFOIL DOSSIER by Caitlin R. Kiernan

THE SINGING HILLS CYCLE by Nghi Vo

FEED THEM SILENCE by Lee Mandelo

AND THEN I WOKE UP by Malcolm Devlin

[jdeanmorgan]

Inspired by @wh0re-behavi0r to share a list of shows I recommend (from someone who also watches too much television) to watch during the strike.

I also won't put 911 or 911LS cause i'm assuming most of you have already watched that.

Disclaimer: some shows span two genres and I'll try to mark them down!

Supernatural/Fantasy/Sci-Fi shows:

Smallville (10 seasons) True Blood (7 seasons) Buffy the Vampire Slayer (7 seasons) Angel (5 seasons) The Magicians (5 seasons) Ghost Whisperer (5 seasons) The Man in the High Castle (4 seasons) Nancy Drew (4 seasons) Preacher (4 seasons) Shadow & Bone (2 seasons) Timeless (2 seasons) Touch (2 seasons) Katla (1 season) House of the Dragon (1 season)

Mystery/Crime/Thriller shows:

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (24 seasons) Criminal Minds (17 seasons) The X Files (11 seasons) Dexter (8 seasons) Riverdale (7 seasons) Sons of Anarchy (7 seasons) Medium (7 seasons) Elementary (7 seasons) How to Get Away with Murder (6 seasons) Money Heist (5 seasons) The Rookie (5 seasons) Gotham (5 seasons) Orphan Black (5 seasons) Leverage (5 seasons) Person of Interest (5 seasons) Mr. Robot (4 seasons) Banshee (4 seasons) Sneaky Pete (3 seasons) Another Life (2 seasons) Twin Peaks (2 seasons) Sense8 (2 seasons) Mindhunter (2 seasons) Black Bird (1 season) Sharp Objects (1 season) Dexter: New Blood (1 season) The Devil's Hour (1 season) Panic (1 season) Kinnporsche (1 season)

Horror shows:

American Horror Story (13 seasons) Supernatural (15 seasons) The Walking Dead (11 seasons) Hannibal (3 seasons) Hemlock Grove (3 seasons) Chucky (2 seasons) Yellowjackets (2 seasons) The Exorcist (2 seasons) From (2 seasons) Interview With the Vampire (1 season) Midnight Mass (1 season) All of Us Are Dead (1 season) Kingdom Hospital (1 season)

Political/War/History shows:

The Good Wife (7 seasons) The Handmaid's Tale (5 seasons) Boardwalk Empire (5 seasons) Charité (4 seasons) X Company (3 seasons) World on Fire (2 seasons) Hunters (2 seasons) Dopesick (1 season) It's a Sin (1 season) Unbelievable (1 season)

Drama/Coming-of-age shows:

Grey's Anatomy (19 seasons) Degrassi: The New Generation (14 seasons) Shameless (11 seasons) Orange is the New Black (7 seasons) Station 19 (6 seasons) Nip/Tuck (6 seasons) The Fosters (5 seasons) Queer as Folk (5 seasons) Degrassi: Next Class (4 seasons) Reign (4 seasons) Skam (4 seasons) Pose (3 seasons) Make It or Break It (3 seasons) H2O: Just Add Water (3 seasons) Love, Victor (3 seasons) Fleabag (2 seasons) The Wilds (2 seasons) The United States of Tara (3 seasons)

Musical Shows:

Glee (6 seasons) Empire (6 seasons) Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (4 seasons) Smash (2 seasons) Schmigadoon! (2 seasons) Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (2 seasons) The Get Down (1 season)

Comedy shows:

Brooklyn Nine-Nine (8 seasons) Malcolm in the Middle (7 seasons) Parks & Recreation (7 seasons) What We Do in the Shadows (5 seasons) Misfits (5 seasons) Jane the Virgin (5 seasons) iZombie (5 seasons) My Name is Earl (4 seasons) Raising Hope (4 seasons) Please Like Me (4 seasons) The Boys (4 seasons) Doom Patrol (4 seasons) Faking It (3 seasons) Sex Education (3 seasons) Ted Lasso (3 seasons) Derry Girls (3 seasons) Santa Clarita Diet (3 seasons) Insatiable (2 seasons) The White Lotus (2 seasons) Trial & Error (2 seasons) Bonding (2 seasons) American Vandal (2 seasons) Special (2 seasons) Scream Queens (2 seasons) Abbott Elementary (2 seasons) Crashing (1 season) Our Flag Means Death (1 season) Now Apocalypse (1 season) Minx (1 season) Blood Drive (1 Season)

[thelonecalzone]

The Unaired Two-Page Conversation

I think we're past the point of possible spoilers, so as promised: the 2pg book conversation that was cut for time (and realism). Originally, I was experimenting with "unsent" books as part of the conversations, but I thought it would ultimately be too confusing and opted not to use that, so anything you see with a strikethrough is an "unsent" book.

(If this text formatting is ultra zany and hard to read, someone please tell me and I'll make it more regular. Allison is Blue, Patty is Red... for reasons... 🫠)

Allison: It’s Lonely at the Center of the Earth, by Zoe Thorogood

Patty: Not Here, by Hieu Minh Nguyen

Allison: Tell Me Everything, by Minka Kelly

Patty: Daily Rituals, by Phoebe Garnsworthy

Patty: Drinking Coffee Elsewhere, ZZ Packer

Patty: Crime, by Irvine Welsh

Allison: Without Me? by Chelle Bliss

Allison: Exciting Times, by Naoise Dolan

Patty: Not Without You, by Harriet Evans

Patty: The Page Turner, by David Leavitt

Allison: I Got a Job and It Wasn’t That Bad, by Scott Dikkers

Patty: Really Moving On, by Pierre Jeanty

Patty: What Kind of Job Can a Monkey Do? by Sato Akira

Allison: Hey Rick! Don’t Be So Rude! by Alyssa Thompson

Patty: I Like Monkeys, by Peter Hansard

Allison: So You Like Me Too, by OPR

Patty: The Miseducation of Cameron Post, by Emily M. Danforth

Allison: Just Say Yes, by Niobia Bryant

Patty: Yes, Chef, by Marcus Samuelsson

Patty: Get to the Point, by Joel Schwartzberg

Allison: I Miss You, by Pat Thomas

Allison: Without You, by Saskia Sarginson

Allison: You’re, by Keisha Ervin

Allison: I Got My Dream Job and So Can You, by Pete Leibman 

Patty: Super Spy, by Matt Kindt

Allison: The Librarian Spy, by Madeline Martin

Patty: For the Love of Books, by Graham Tarrant

Allison: Reminds Me of You, by Retno Handini

Allison: For the Thrill of It, by Simon Baatz

Patty: Run Towards the Danger, by Sarah Polley

Allison: Risking it All, by Tessa Bailey

Patty: Risk (With Me), by Sue Wilder

Patty: Ambitious Girl, by Meena Harris

Allison: Yeah, Right, by Jim and Helen Fox

Patty: The Follow-Through Factor: Getting from Doubt to Done, by Gene C. Hayden

Allison: A Stroke of Dumb Luck, by Shiloh Walker

Patty: Credit Where Credit is Due, by Frank Casey

Allison: Optimists Die First, by Susin Neilsen

Patty: The Price of Immortality, by Peter Ward

Allison: Death Visits the Hair Salon, by Amy Anderson

Patty: Murder in the Library, by Katie Gayle

Allison: Sounds Like Fun, by Bryan Moriarty

Patty: I Have More Fun With You Than Anybody, by Lige Clark

Patty: Certifiably Insane, by Arthur W. Bahr

Allison: Charming as a Verb, by Ben Philippe

Patty: How Do You Manage? by John Nicholson

Allison: Liquor, by Poppy Z. Brite

Patty: Hardly Know Her, by Laura Lippman

Allison: Don’t Be Gross, by Barbara Bakos

Patty: It’s Just Anatomy! by Ellen

Allison: Rough Transition, by Patrick Kelley

Patty: Some Girls Like it Rough, by Marlo Peterson

Allison: What Sort of Girls Were They? by Petrea Leslie

Patty: Girls with Bright Futures, by Tracy Dobmeier

Allison: I’m a Little Ghost and I Like the Dark, by Lynda Kimmel

Patty: Dark As the Grave Wherein My Friend Is Laid, by Malcolm Lowrey

Allison: Murder in the Dark, by Simon R. Green

Patty: My Job Was To Bring The Shovel, by Randall M. Rueff

Allison: The Complete Accomplice, by Steve Aylett

Patty: The Magician’s Assistant, by Ann Patchett

Allison: The Witch’s Familiar, by Raven Grimassi

Patty: Witch Minion, by Lissa Kasey

Allison: These Witches Don’t Burn, by Isabel Sterling

Patty: The Drowning Kind, by Jennifer McMahon

Allison: A Touch Morbid, by Leah Clifford

Patty: Lucy Clark Will Not Apologize, by Margo Rabb

Allison: I Wonder What She’s Doing Tonight, by James Hold

Patty: Whiskey, Words, and a Shovel, by R. H. Sin

Allison: Sounds Perfect, by Ashley Boren

Patty: How I Made a Friend, Daniel Georges

Allison: Good For You (Between the Lines), by Tammara Webber

Patty: We’re Very Good Friends, by P.K. Hallinan

Allison: Sounds Fake, But Okay, by Sarah Costello

Patty: What If It’s True? by Charles Martin

Allison: What If It Wasn’t? by Ivan Itch

Patty: Why Do You Care? by Saju Skaria

Allison: I’m Fine and Neither Are You, by Camille Pagán

Allison: The Replacement Part, by Nora Wylde

Patty: Just a Friend, by Ashley Nicole

Allison: How to Kill Your Best Friend, by Lexie Elliott

Patty: You’re All Just Jealous of My Jetpack, by Tom Gauld

Allison: Dead Jealous, by Sharon Jones

Patty: You’ve Got to Have Friends, by Delbert George Fitzpenfield Anthony

Allison: Everything I Need I Get From You, by Kaitlyn Tiffany

Allison: Among Other Things, by Robert Long Foreman

Allison: Truths I Learned from Sam, ​​by Kristin Butcher

Patty: The Idiot King, by Patty Jansen

Allison: He Helped Me Climb the Mountain, by Betty E. Wright

Patty: The Man Who Pushed His Wife off a Cliff, by Will D. Burn

Patty: Men are Trash, by Salman Faris 

Patty: And That’s Why I Think I Prefer A Rainbow Horse, by Tiarra Nazario

Patty: Sam Houston’s Wife, by William Seale

Allison: What About Her, by Emma Tharpe

Patty: Amelia Bedelia Sleeps Over, by Herman Parish

Patty: The Undead in my Bed, by Katie McAlister

Allison: Sleeping with the Enemy, by Nancy Price

Allison: How Could You Do That?! by Laura Schlessinger

Allison: How Could You Murder Us? by Charae Lewis

Allison: Why Her? by Nicki Koziarz

Allison: I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me, by Jerold J. Kreisman

Patty: I Was Joking, Of Course, by Paul Jennings

Allison: Liar, by Tate James

Patty: What if I Say the Wrong Thing? by Verna A Myers

Allison: Don’t Look Back, by Josh Lanyon

Patty: Come Back, by Sally Crosiar

Patty: SHIT, by Shahnon Ahmad

Patty: Barbie: It Takes Two, by Grace Baranowski

Allison: I Changed My Mind, by Jimmy Evans

Allison: Allison Hewitt Is Trapped, by Madeleine Roux

Patty: Are You Still There, by Sara Lynn Schreeger

Patty: Wait for Me, by Caroline Leech

Allison: Look Back, by Tatsuki Fujimoto

[lucky-ladybugs-lovelies]

It feels so good to finally get a fic going again that was stalled for years. Suddenly, after years of drought, the floodgates open and the right words and plot twists come pouring out.

I have written three chapters of The Night of the Magician this week and will soon post a fourth. I took things in a different angle than I'd planned on years ago, but that was because I had to accept what I'd known all along, that the original outline in my blurb made no sense. I do not think Count Manzeppi would deliberately go to extreme lengths to antagonize one of his enemies just when he finally achieved what he wanted. Plus, there wouldn't have been time to do all that plan would entail. I struggled for several days on how to fix the problem with the new angle taken, but I have it now!

Also, it's fun having Malcolm show up to annoy Coley. I must have 5Ds in there somewhere. ;)

[unsoundnovel]

@storystrung [ THE MIDDLEST BROTHER. ]

"What if I told you…." Hawke twists his feet beneath the table, toes in and out, ankles piroutting, a ballet as his hand and neck instead twist and roll and shake, silly, more like a modern dancer.

"That I am in love." This is true.

"For the first time." This is NOT true. Bubbles has fallen for every handsome man that has ever looked at him. Most did not share his interest. Others did, but not his kindness. Bubbles has gotten hurt before. And yet he still reaches out with flirtations like candy, blowing bubbles with soap foam scooped to his mouth in the tub like when they were kids.

"The way he moves me, Hawkey. He threatens to rip out my heart with a glance!"

Toes tap, he swoons on to the table dramatically, just to crane up his neck and start sipping again at his favorite ale---the cheapest on tap, of course.

"But… the whole mage… thing. I'm hardly a mage. More of a magician, really. You're more of a mage, the way you pop up from the shadows with your little potions and brews, you fancy schmancy alchemist, you. And yet…"

"I do not want to hurt him. Or scare him off. With my scary, scary sparkle fingers."

Fenris is not the first handsome man Bubbles has fallen for that did not like magic. The first was another little boy when they were young— to whom Bubbles thought he could teach a magic trick. He ran to his parents, who would have ran to the nearest templar if not for Malcolm's convincing. The disappointment of his parents and siblings was all he needed to keep his magic to himself from then on.

Only using it for trouble, training, secret secret art projects---or when Adrien said it was okay.

"Do you think it would be…. Okay? If I… continued to express…. Interest…. Affection…." Hawke falls flat on his face on the table, drunk, silly, the goofiest guy. "Undying love?"

[thereallucifer666]

"Something like that," Lucifer said with a smile. If he had his wings, he could've basically disappeared instantly. Now though, he was just good at avoiding unwanted attention, it almost appeared supernatural. He'd gotten her with that a few times too, appearing and disappearing like some kind of magician.

Lucifer gave her shoulder a squeeze. He understood that feeling all too well. "Yes, but when is life ever that easy to allow that." He said. He wished it was. She definitely deserved a break. In the very least, she was vindicated for not trusting Malcolm, so that should ease some tension at work down the road.

Skirting by her, he gathered up his clothes and changed quickly, leaving Dan's sleepwear folded on the arm of the couch. And then, like a ghost, he had slipped out of the back and disappeared into the early morning.

Lucifer made a pouting face at her telling him he needed to be silent. He was a showman by nature, so needing to keep quiet was more of an effort for him than most. But he was mainly doing to face just to tease her. "Boring." He said.

He continued to eat his breakfast. This could go so many ways today. In the end, Chloe would be the hero of this tale, but it might take a while to get her there. Personally, he was expecting a full, genuine apology from every cop who ever doubted her, but he didn't know if she'd get it.

"You know I can't lie," Lucifer reminded her. "But I will do my best to...edit what I say, in a way it will make sense to you humans and your reports."

Watching Trixie rush away, he looked back to her, seeing the stress of the day already beginning to pile onto her shoulders.

"Please. Child's play," He said with a smile. "If I don't wish to be seen, you can rest assured I will not be seen." Standing up from the island, he gathered the plates and put them into the sink to be washed later. He'd better change and get going now, before those hyenas surrounded the house. Stopping at Chloe's side, he said, "If you need to today, you'll know where to find me." His tone was serious, knowing how much she might need his support through this. He even punctuated it with a small kiss to the side of her head.

[magicmalcolm]

Malcolm Plays Final Fantasy IX

I Got The Burmecia Blues

(previous parts here)

Okay, so there's a few things to do before hitting up Burmecia.

First, a small optional area to the right of the exit from Gizamaluke's Grotto. The North Gate has a nice little scene between Freya and Quina, where the former envies the carefree nature of the latter. There's also a couple of Chests to loot. Yay!

Second, we track down a Nymph enemy for Quina to learn another Blue Magic Skill: Night. Night induces the Sleep Status on EVERYTHING in the current battle, friend and foe alike. Can combo quite well if everyone on your side has the Insomniac ability equipped (which we can get from the Coral Ring Freya won at the Festival Of The Hunt).

Third, we can dig up one more Chocograph location in this area of the map. Taking a detour past the left of the sand-tornado takes us to a secluded beach, where a set of Chocobo tracks lay. The treasure location is also on this beach and��

IT'S A TRAP!!!

Or…not?

Choco has acquired the Reef Ability! So this doesn't give Choco the ability to walk on all water yet, this one allows him to traverse the shallow light-blue waters. This will come in handy to nab a few more Chocograph Treasures back on the other side of Gizamaluke's Grotto, but we'll get them later. Burmecia awaits!

And what is the first thing that happens to us in Burmecia?

Welp.

Another enemy can be eaten here in Burmecia for Blue Magic, eating a Magic Vice enemy will earn Quina the Magic Hammer skill. which removes a random amount (based on their current HP) of the enemies' remaining MP. Could be useful to help neuter some bosses down the road.

Also some of the chests in Burmecia are actually Mimics. Mimics can sometimes summon the aforementioned Magic Vices, so battling them isn't all bad.

Sadly, Burmecia is already in Ruins by the time we get there. Soldiers and civilians alike fallen at the hands of Brahne's Black Mage Army. Still, they were nice enough to leave a Lightning Staff and this Mythril Spear untouched for us to acquire.

We also bump into Stiltzkin again, who sells us a pretty sweet bundle of goodies for a barganimous price. And we also get another Kupo Nut and oh oh this another game spanning quest isn't it?

Welp. Burmecia's already wrecked, might as well head back and get sidetracked. Play the Backtrack Song!

So first we go back to Gizmaluke's Grotto and give Moguta the Kupo Nut we just got.

He's Kupo For Kupo Nuts.

Then we head back to Qu's Marsh to check on the Frog Spawn.

This goes immediately onto Vivi. Ability Up is going to be really useful for him soon.

And since Choco obtained the Reef Ability earlier, we can grab two more Chocograph Treasures! The Magician's Robe is nice, but the Oak Staff from Chocograph #11 is the real prize right now. Bio, Stop and Drain? For Best Boy Vivi? Yay!

After that it's heading back to prep for facing Beatrix. Everyone gets moved to the back row, Zidane gets the Coral Ring and then it's pretty much down to the whims of fate.

He's doing his best.

Kuja's so sassy.

My strategy for the Beatrix fight is pretty simple, Zidane Steals and hopes for a miracle to at least get that Chain Plate, Freya casts Reis' Wind to open and heals with Potions when not defending, Quina casts Vanish on Zidane and recasts as necessary, and Vivi tries to land a Slow spell on Beatrix. Getting the Mythril Sword is about as mythical as it gets during this hopeless boss battle. If Beatrix KOs Zidane before you can Steal the Chain Plate (let alone the Sword), you might as well reset. The remakes are nice enough to Autosave right before the Beatrix Battle, at least.

OMG I actually got it what in the actual…

The real kicker is that it's not even a unique weapon...you can literally buy this in Treno in like five minutes from now...and it's almost immediately made obsolete in Treno too.

Unfortunately that's where the good luck ends. Beatrix activates her trap card: Hopeless Boss Battle. Fortunately it's still Disc One of Four so we're allowed to live for some reason.

And yet you do nothing. Aah, blessed be to Overconfident Villains.

[astrancva]

The Origin of the Quartermaster

(Note: While this is my default for my portrayal of Q, some of it can be shifted depending on the partner. A lot of what is written here has been developed over the past few years with several partners. At this point, I'm not taking into account the fact that Vesper was buried in Italy)

The man who would become the Quartermaster of MI6 was born Malcolm Wallace Lynd to Nicholas Lynd and his wife Catherine Wallace. He was a twin, his sister Vesper born only fifteen minutes before him. As children, they were inseparable. Both were brilliant in different ways and they spent hours reading and exchanging ideas. Malcolm found he had a gift for technology. The first computer his parents bought him, he took apart to see how it worked. He put it back together better than it was before.

As a teenager, he discovered he had the same taste in men as his sister did. Something that amused both of them. As they grew older, they began to drift apart, their interests taking them in different directions. Even so, they never went longer than a week without speaking to each other.

While Q didn’t know what direction his sister’s path was taking, his own took him farther and farther into the dark underworld of London. He soon found that his skills with computers were in high demand. He sold his services to anyone who would pay, often ending up as more than just a valued employee.

Malcolm became known as Ariel, named for the spirit in The Tempest who had been bound to Prospero after the magician saved his life. He embraced the moniker and used his skills to his advantage.

And then, one day he received a visit from Her Majesty’s government. Though he had known his sister had worked for the Treasury, he had no idea what else she could possibly have been involved in. The story they told him felt thin, at best, and at worst an outright lie.

That night, he set himself to finding out the truth behind Vesper’s death. What he never expected was to fall into the web of MI6. His inquiries, no matter how well hidden, soon alerted the espionage agency to his activities and he was brought in. It was the head of the organization, a woman named M who spoke with him. She gave him an ultimatum. If he came to work for her, she would reveal, within reason, the true cause of his sister’s death. If he didn’t agree, she would have him thrown into the deepest, darkest prison she could find.

Of course, Malcolm was smart enough to take the offer. So she put him to work in Q Branch as a low level technician. Something the brilliant young man detested. However, it was apparent to everyone around him that it was only a matter of time before he would be the head of Q Branch.

True to her word, M gave him all the information she could. Vesper had been involved with a mission for MI6. After the mission, she went to Italy with the agent she had worked with and she died quite tragically. That was all M was willing to tell him. However she did remind him was that he had no clearance for that particular case and if he continued to dig, he would be subject to termination and find himself thrown in a deep hole.

Though he wasn’t happy with what he was given, he took it. And he devoted himself to his work with MI6.

Finally, he worked his way to the top of Q-Branch, taking over as Quartermaster. And from there, he struggled to drag the archaic institution into the 21st century.

[smoakinn]

I can never go too long without putting this on my blog.

[brightmalcolm]

honestly I shouldn’t even be shocked with how crazy the cases on prodigal son are considering the shit chris and sam came up with for deception (2018)...those were like “billionaire arms dealer hires hit man to find and kidnap his psychic so she’ll come back to advise him on business deals” or “assassin infiltrates top weapons manufacturing and sneaks in bits of glass every day for six months to build a glass gun and steal a device that knocks out all wireless communication in a mile wide area so she can find and kill the CIA agents who killed her boss” or “drug lord fakes his own death in a plane explosion but actually stole the plane and drove it off and is now trying to flee the country” or the classic “woman with no known identity uses graffiti artists to track targets to steal from with the plan to use those stolen objects to unlock a vault built by a magician in the early twentieth century to hide the fortunes of members of a cult”...if anything they toned it DOWN for prodigal son...

[coldasyou]

God Cameron and Malcolm together is chaotic but Jonathan and Malcolm together is just too much lmao

I KNOW jkfjksjks like at least cameron tries to friendly jonathan just straight up gives zero fucks. he’s like wow I was framed for manslaughter and I got sent to actual prison, your dad kills 23 people and they give him his own personal study??? I feel like they’d end up having a fist fight bc jonathan doesn’t know how to act smh 

[do-androids-dream-ao3acc]

10 characters 10 fandoms 10 tags

Been tagged by @joker1315, thanks a lot! Soooo let me think... They are, NOT in chronological order because I could never decide who is my favorite blorbo...

1. Malcolm Bright, Prodigal Son

2. Donald Ressler, The Blacklist

3. Geralt, The Witcher (NOT the Netflix version, thank you very much)

4. Sarah Manning, Orphan Black

5. Monroe, Grimm

6. Evan Buckley, 9-1-1

7. Bess Till, Snowpiercer

8. The Doctor, Doctor Who (especially 10, 12, 13)

9. Quentin Coldwater, The Magicians

10. Sam Becket, Quantum Leap (the original show)

I’m tagging... gods do I know 10 people? Uuuuh @humbae, @deagle (in the hope of some Musical content), @omaano, @marinamk29 just to see if she ever thinks of anything else but Ciri and Vernon, @witch-and-her-witcher, @wonderwhump, @lamburrito for they say there can’t be too much fandoms, @poeti-kat, @herbalina-of-yesteryear and @namesonboats. Oh look, I found 10. And if I haven’t tagged you reading this, that’s because my brain is not fully functioning and you should feel yourself tagged.

[typingtess]

Tiptoeing through the “Survival of the Fittest” guest cast

Pamela Reed as Roberta Deeks Natalia Del Riego as Rosa Reyes Both are back from “Flesh & Blood” week before last.

Dominic Burgess as Herman Cooper Was Jerry Summers in Dr. Death, Uncle Eddy in Better Things and was John Wayne Gacy in Dahmer – Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story.  

Appeared in episodes of Doctor Who, Leverage, Rules of Engagement, 90210, Maron, Family Tools, Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD, Raising Hope, Dads, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Leftovers, We Need to Talk, 2 Broke Girls, Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life, Feud, The Night Shift, Teen Wolf, The Flash, Supernatural, Queen of the South, The Good Place, American Horror Story, The Rookie, Santa Clarita Diet, Perfect Harmony, Modern Family, The Magicians, Star Trek: Picard, Fantasy Island, Our Flag Means Death and 9-1-1: Lone Star.

Piper Curda as Lisa Cho Was Casey in Rule the Mix, Kennedy Van Buren in A.N.T. Farm and Jasmine King in I Didn’t Do It.

Guest roles include Law & Order: SVU, Malibu Country, Body of Proof, Live and Maddie, The Rookie, Legacies and Raven’s Home.

Bobby Hogan as Marine Private First Class James Williams Appeared in an episode of 9-1-1: Lone Star and American Horror Stories.

Cyrus Hobbi as Marine Staff Sergeant Pierce Plays Yuri on General Hospital.

Also appeared in episodes of Ballers, Betrayed, Liza on Demand, Young Rock and The Family Business.

Jesse Boone as Nicholas "Nick" Embry Was in episodes of The Heights and Betrayed.

Susan Slome as Jordana Hanson Guest starred in episodes of High Incident, Ned and Stacey, Married with Children, Just Shoot Me, Party of Five, Malcolm & Eddie, Payne, Judging Amy, Good vs. Evil, The X Files, It’s Like You Know, The District, Without a Trace, Friends, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, George Lopez, Angel, Miss Match, Scrubs, Jake in Progress, House, Kitchen Confidential, Everybody Hates Chris, Crossing Jordan, Grey’s Anatomy, The Mentalist, The Mindy Project, CSI: Crime Scene Investigation, Criminal Minds, Silicon Valley and Shooter.

Marcus Antony Brunner as Marine Private First Class Edward Hanson New.

Written by:  Andrew Bartels wrote or co-wrote "Allegiance", "Zero Days", "The Grey Man", "Humbug", "Fighting Shadows", "Driving Miss Diaz", "Angels & Daemons", "Where There’s Smoke…", "Glasnost", "Old Tricks" "Battle Scars", "Fool Me Twice", "Warrior of Peace", "Reentry", "The Prince", "Smokescreen", "The One That Got Away"/"No More Secrets" two-parter, "Yellow Jacket", "Missing Time", "If the Fates Allow", "Red Rover, Red Rover", "Divided We Fall" and “Genesis”.

Directed by: Eric A. Pot directed “Resurrection”, “Windfall”, “Traitor”, “Internal Affairs”, “Home is Where the Heart Is”, “Forasteira”, “Reentry”, “Hit List”, “The One Who Got Away”, “Kill Beale Vol 1”, “Fortune Favors the Bold”, “A Fait Accompli”, “Imposter Syndrome”, “Indentured” and “Sorry for Your Loss”.