#not gonna make a post saying my comic is entry level or any of that

[shizamura]

https://sarilho.net/en/

[focsle]

[ID: screenshot of @kittokatsu saying: I would like to hear about the other coincidences if you wish to share!]

I’m gonna stick these under a readmore I think just cos while Im happy to share I’d prefer that people don’t rebl it!

This is a long game, but over the years I’ve cobbled together a career largely in public history. It’s not a field I expected to be in, it’s not one I have ANY academic background in (I went to art school that had like…Baby High School-Level humanities classes I…REALLY do not have a rigorous academic background at all), but I stumbled into it by being a passionate nerd I guess.

In 2014 I had been a year out of school and was anxiously wallowing through my options as far as what I was doing with my life. But also was working on The Whaling Comic (though a much different iteration than what I’m drawing now). I went to a historic house museum (that has nothing to do with whaling but the time period was right) to get interior reference pictures for said whaling comic. Fell in love with said house. Volunteered there once a week. Even though I was tremendously shy from the ages of 12-22 I suddenly realized that I wasn’t when I was talking to people about history. My relationship with that house later launched my career in working in various historical spaces and at various museums, and that work equipped me with an understanding I didn’t have from my prior educational background about how to find out about plain old everyday people from the past. I learned what resources and records I had access to, how to read them properly, how to navigate federal and state census and cross reference them with ward maps and fire insurance maps to find old addresses in the past when enumerators didn’t initially list them and when the streets and house numbers changed over the decades. I learned what city directories were, how to use those, all this stuff. These are the things I ultimately used to find out about William’s life based off the pieces of personal info in his journal (I knew he was a New Yorker, that’s it. Everything else came from my own research)

While reading his journal I knew, historically, what he was talking about in ways I wouldn’t have prior to my obtaining this background in my city’s history. I knew the developmental history of the specific neighborhood he lived in without needing further background. And the eeriest thing was when I was looking through city directories to see other potential addresses the fam may have lived at, I found his father by chance…running his physician’s practice DIRECTLY across the street from the historic house where I got my start in this all in 2014, and the family lived very nearby to that house. His father was a contemporary of the patriarch of said house. I went to that house cos of whaling reference pictures, fell into public history through it, used what I learned through osmosis in that work to find out about a specific whaler 8 years later, and was led directly back to the beginning of that circle. So that’s what made me feel like I was…meant to find this journal. First coincidence.

So…I write a little blog post about the parts of his journal I found most interesting in December. I leave off a copy of the book he said he wanted to read and didn‘t get the chance to at the family plot. And I think that, with that, I’ve told his story. I’m all done, and that’s as much of a closure as either of us is gonna get.

Then 2 1/2 months later, mid March, I am suddenly seized with the need to transcribe the entire journal. I hadn’t thought I was gonna engage with it like that again but I just…suddenly felt like I needed to, and that I needed to do it soon. So I transcribe the thing in three days. And having spent so much close time with it, when I get to the end I feel like the timing of his death doesn’t make sense to me anymore. His last journal entry is on Feb 17th. The captain says he dies suddenly ‘about April 13’, the ‘about‘ telling me that this is recorded sometime after the fact. The ship goes into port in Talcahuano from Feb 22nd to March 9th. And I just feel like, after reading what he wrote through the whole journal, there is NO way William would have nothing to say in the weeks that followed about being in a port for the first time in 6 months, in a new country and continent, when earlier he was writing journal entries about just like ‘saw a bird today…got rained on today’. Him not writing anything about things that were frankly probably among the most exciting parts of his voyage so far for two whole months seems highly uncharacteristic.

At the back of his journal he had drawn a calendar since the voyage began, and had mapped it out to the beginning of July, 1857. Every single day, regardless of if he wrote a journal entry or not, he consistently made a visual mark over the day as it passed. When those visual marks stop, it’s on March 12th. Which again seems strange for him to suddenly stop marking those days when he didnt miss a single one before. And then when I counted back MY days to when I had this immediate compulsion to transcribe his whole journal and resolved to do it, it was on March 13th. My suspicion that his death happened around that day came AFTER my resolution to transcribe the journal. So that’s the second coincidence that spooked me a bit. There’s no way to say for sure, and my thoughts on his death date are only my thoughts—if I was being less wooey I’d go by the information the captain put down because that’s more concrete. But again it’s a weird intersection of dates.

So now I’m sort of…being very open to anything else that comes my way.

[stranger-who-writes-fiction]

Back at it again with my self-indulgent comic posts. This time! It’s Supergirl: Woman of Tomorrow #3, perhaps the most tonally-distinct entry yet, with shades of The Twilight Zone. 

Spoilers!

So, as mentioned, this issue is the most deliberate in terms of both its pacing and its tone, IMO.

What is that tone, you ask?

To quote Alex Danvers, from “Midvale”: Hello, darkness.

THE STORY:

Kara and Ruthye are still looking for Krem Clues in the alien town of Maypole.

(Which is actually just Small Town, USA, complete with vintage 50s aesthetics.)

But the locals are clearly hiding something! So Kara and Ruthye continue to investigate, and they eventually discover what it was that the residents of Maypole were so keen to keep hidden. 

Genocide, basically. 

As I said, this issue struck me as very Twilight Zone; a genre story involving the build-up to a dark twist, all set against the backdrop of an idyllic small town. (Think, like, “The Monsters are Due on Maple Street” but instead of focusing on the Red Scare, it’s classism and racism.)

The wealthier blue aliens kicked all of the purple aliens out of town, and when space pirates showed up to pillage and plunder, the blue aliens made a deal with them: the lives of the purple aliens in exchange for their safety.  

Which is where the episodic story connects to the larger mission; it was Krem who suggested the trade, and then joined up with the Brigands (space pirates) when he was freed by the blue aliens.

The issue ends with no tidy resolution to the terrible things Kara and Ruthye discovered, but they do have a lead on where to find Krem, now, as well as Barbond’s Brigands.

KARA-CTERIZATION:

Ironically, it’s here, in the darkest chapter yet, that we get the closest to what might be considered ‘classic’ Kara. 

Which I think comes down to that aforementioned deliberate pace--this issue is a little slower, a little quieter. It gives the characters some room to breathe.

That’s not to say Crusty Kara is gone. Oh no. She is still very much Crusty. XD 

But anyways. A list! Of Kara moments I loved!

I mentioned a few of these in a prior post when the preview pages came out: I like the moment where Kara blows down the guy’s house of cards, and I like that the action is echoed later in the issue when she grabs the mayor’s desk and tosses it aside. A nice visual representation of the escalation of Kara being, like. Done with these creeps. (Creeps is an understatement but you get the idea.)

Another one from the preview pages: Kara explains to Ruthye that her super hearing won’t necessarily help her detect a lie, especially if she’s dealing with an alien species she’s not familiar with.

It not only reveals her level of competence and understanding of her super powers, it also shows that, you know. She’s a thinker. She’s smart. 

Amazing! Showing, rather than telling us, that Kara is smart! Without mentioning the science guild at all wow hey wow.

(Sorry, pointed criticism of the SG show fandom.)

Anyways.

I dig the PJs! 

And Kara catching the bullet! Not only are the poses and character acting great, it’s also a neat bit of panel composition:

We start with Ruthye’s POV, and then move to the wide shot of the room. The panel where Kara actually catches the bullet is down and to the side of the wide shot panel--we move our eyes the way her body/arm would have to move to intercept the bullet. Physicality in static, 2D images!

Also, like. It’s a very tense moment, life-or-death, but. Ruthye’s wide-eyed surprise at the bullet in Kara’s hand? Kind of adorable. 

I was pretty much prepared for the page of Kara shielding Ruthye from the gunfire to be the highlight--it was one of the first pages King shared and I was like, ‘yeah, YEAH.’ But, shockingly? The TRUE highlight of the issue?

Where do I BEGIN?!?!

EVERYTHING. About this moment. Is lovely.

From Kara holding Ruthye above the bench to explaining the concept of a piggyback ride, to telling her:

“I’m going to hold my hands here, and these hands can turn coal into diamonds, so they’re not going to let go. I’m going to keep you safe.”

HNNNNNNNNNNNG.

Ruthye’s narration--about how Kara had avoided flying as she was concerned it would freak Ruthye out--just adds a whole additional layer of YES, GOOD, YES, and her line on that splash page is great: “You see, all that time, she was worried about me.”

HNNNNNNNNNNNG. AGAIN.

To say nothing of the STELLAR ARTWORK.

And SPEAKING of that stellar artwork, Evely and Lopes continue to knock it out of the park. Each issue is distinct and beautifully crafted, a true joy to look at.

Before I jump into more of the art, a few final notes of character stuff in general.

Ruthye is the one most affected by the experience in Maypole, as she can’t comprehend how a society of people that look so nice and gentle and peaceful could have been party to such a horrible act.

One of the big criticisms of the book thus far is that Supergirl is not the main character, and I guess I can agree with that observation. Typically, in Western media, the main character is the one who goes through the most change in the story. 

And, yeah. That’s Ruthye.

As I was reading the end, where Ruthye sits on the curb and Kara hugs her, I was imagining how the scene would’ve played, had King stuck with the original idea for the series: Kara as the one learning to be tough/experiencing all of this for the first time, and while I think that could certainly work...

I continue to appreciate that King literally flipped the script; that Kara, especially in this issue, is like, ‘I’ve seen this, I know this,’ as opposed to being the one going through a loss of innocence.

*Marge Simpson voice* I just think it’s neat!

Because Kara’s been a teen in DC comics for so long--ever since she was reintroduced to the main DCU continuity, actually--so this is all brand new territory, here. Having an older Kara who’s SEEN SOME STUFF.

(Alsoooooo, since Bendis made the destruction of Krypton not just inaction and climate disaster, but rather, genocide, and the subtext of a Kryptonian diaspora text, the waitress’ derogatory comment regarding the the destruction of Kryton, as well as Kara picking up the bad vibes the entire time, suggests not just a broad commentary on discrimination in all its forms, but specifically allegorical anti-Semitism. The purple aliens being forced out of their homes and into substandard living conditions, then the blue aliens--their neighbors and once-fellow residents--essentially allowing the space pirates to kill them, making them literal scapegoats, Kara discovering the remains of the purple aliens, and Ruthye’s horror at the ‘banality of evil’...yes. A case could be made, I think.) 

(Which would probably require a post unto itself and a lot more in-depth discussion, nuance, and cited sources.)

(Should mention that King has brought up that both he and Orlando--the other Supergirl writer he talked to--are Jewish, and for him personally, that shaped his views on Kara’s origin story.)

I guess my point is that this issue is perhaps not as out-of-left-field as some might think, and just because there isn’t as obvious an arc for Kara, doesn’t mean there isn’t some sharp character work at play. 

(I could be WAY OFF, of course, and I’m not suggesting it’s a clear 1:1 comparison. I’d actually really love to hear King talk about this issue in particular.)

Anyways.

Here’s the final page, which I think works, because as I mentioned before, there is no easy answer/quick wrap-up to the story of Maypole:

THE ART:

I mean. How many times can I just shout ‘ART! AAAARRRRRRRRRRRTTTT!’ before it gets old?

I dunno, but I guess we’re gonna FIND OUT.

There are some panels in this issue that I just. Like ‘em! From a purely artistic standpoint! Because they’re so good!

Like, I just really love the way Kara is drawn in that top panel. Her troubled, confused expression, the colors of the fading light, the HAIR. 

Evely draws the best hair. I know I’ve said this before. I don’t care. I will continue to say it, because it continues to be true.

The issue I find myself running up against when I make these posts is that I really don’t want to post whole pages, as that’s generally frowned upon (re: pirating etc.) but with something like this, you just can’t appreciate it in panel-by-panel snippets.

(Guided View on digital reading platforms is a BANE and a POX I say!)

Anyways.

LOVE the implied movement of the cape settling as Kara speeds in and stops. 

And, obviously, Kara flicking the bullet away is just. A+. 

And the EYES, man. LOPES’ COLORS ON THE EYES???!?! BEAUTIFUL.

Also, should note the lettering! The more rounded letters for the ‘WOOSH’ of Kara’s speed (and, earlier, the super breath) work nicely, and contrast with the angular, violent BLAMS of the gunshots. 

And, I gotta say, the editor is doing a really great job of not cluttering up the artwork with all the caption boxes. Which is no small task.

(I assume the editor is placing them, as editors usually handle word balloon/caption box placement, but I suppose it could be Evely? Sometimes the artist handles it. Either way, whoever’s taking care of all the text, EXCELLENT WORK! BRAVO!)

Okay I think that’s everything.

Ah, nope, wait.

MISC.

Just a funny observation, more than anything else: Superman: Red and Blue dropped this week, and King had a story in there, “The Special” (which was very good, btw.) Both Lois and the waitress swear a lot so I’m beginning to think that this is just how King writes dialogue for any adult character who isn’t Clark. XD

This is absolutely a personal preference but when Kara was like, “And my name IS Supergirl,” I was like nooooo. I know King is trying to simplify all of the conflicting origin stories and lore but I LIKE KARA DANVERS, SIR. XD

It’s almost assuredly a cash-grab/an attempt for DC to get all the money it can out of a book they don’t have much confidence in, but I like the cardstock covers! Very classy, much Strange Adventures.

(OH my gosh, can you imagine that issue 1 cover with spot gloss???? Basically the only way you could possibly improve on it.) 

Okay NOW I’m done. For real. XD NEXT TIME: Kara and Ruthye go after Krem and the Brigands!

[dangerouscommiesubversive]

Whenever commie is no longer busy and have time (and ofc would want to write it), would you be willing to make a complete list of those who would kabedon; and the list of "who would and would not say the f/curse word"?

Oh man, you want a complete list? Well, ok, let’s go show by show here, I’m gonna get really lengthy with it. Like, I can’t go through every character in every show, but I’ll hit what I think are the major points.

Fair warning before you mash the read-more: I did, in fact, go through nearly every show I’ve seen. This post is long.

We will start with Kamen Rider.

Kamen Rider 1号: I want you to look me in the eyes and tell me you heard my grandpa say a cuss. Go on. I dare you.

Kuuga

Godai Yusuke: is capable of saying fuck, but does not, because he’s too polite. He might kabedon, but not for any romantic or sexual reasons, just because he likes to be close to people and he gets excited about stuff.

Ichijo Kaoru: says fuck on a regular basis. I think he would kabedon unironically but only in the heat of the moment.

Ra-Baruba-De: doesn’t cuss because it’s beneath her. She’d kabedon Ichijo, but would follow this up with an attempt to kill him.

Agito

Tsugami Shouichi: does not swear and cannot kabedon, although someone else might do it to him.

Hikawa Makoto: might say fuck in a moment of stress, but rarely swears otherwise. He could and would kabedon, but only in situations where doing so would get a comedic result related to his strength and clumsiness.

Ashihara Ryou, the sexiest man in the world: probably swears like a sailor and would absolutely kabedon. The very thought makes me go weak at the knees.

Kino Kaoru: definitely says “fuck,” but I don’t think he does fuck, and he certainly doesn’t kabedon.

Ozawa Sumiko, however: both says “fuck” and does it. She will kabedon, and she will stand on Omuro’s shoulders to get enough height for it.

Ryuki

Kido Shinji: always wants to swear, but doesn’t actually do it. He could kabedon, but only in anger; the thought of doing so in a romantic or sexual context would make him blush and stammer.

Akiyama Ren: can and will say “fuck” at a moment’s notice. You know he kabedons.

Kitaoka Shuichi: says “fuck” quietly, when no one can hear him except maybe Goro. He would kabedon gently and think himself very sexy.

Yura Goro: is a sweet, sweet man who neither swears nor kabedons.

Asakura Takeshi: is saying “fuck” at this very moment. He would only kabedon as a prelude to stabbing.

Tezuka Miyuki: is on this list because I love him, but he does not say “fuck” and could not be induced to. He could be kabedon’ed.

555 (we haven’t finished this one so I can’t guarantee that all characters will be included)

Inui Takumi: I’m pretty sure he could say “fuck” but I don’t think he’s actually inclined to. Kabedon’ing requires a level of investment in whatever situation that I don’t think he’d want to admit to.

Kusaka Masato: oh, absolutely.

Sonoda Mari: swears all the time. Doesn’t kabedon because she expects someone to do it to her.

Keitaro Kikuchi: is a very nice boy who does neither of these things.

Kiba Yuji: contains vast lakes of suppressed rage, and if he says “fuck” even once it might all come out. Does not kabedon for the same reason.

Osada Yuka: says “fuck,” but only in her heart. Does not kabedon.

Kaido Naoya: says “fuck,” but only when he can’t find a more ridiculous option. Absolutely kabedons at a moment’s notice.

Smart Lady: does not say “fuck.” Will definitely kabedon you, and moreover she’ll do it with her leg to make sure that the situation is just, uncomfortably sexual.

Blade

Kenzaki Kazuma: is breathtakingly earnest but nevertheless does, on occasion, say “fuck.” Doesn’t kabedon because he’s too sad.

Aikawa Hajime: has neither the inclination nor the desire to say “fuck” or to kabedon.

Tachibana Sakuya: can say “fuck,” but mostly doesn’t. Also too sad to kabedon.

Kamijou Mutsuki: would say “fuck” to get someone’s attention. He wishes he could kabedon.

Kurihara Amane: is in so much trouble with her mother for saying “fuck.”

Hibiki

Hibiki/Hidaka Hitoshi: is An Dad, and thus is theoretically capable of saying “fuck,” but if he does then it means the situation’s gotten pretty serious. (Or he’s hit his thumb with a hammer.) He can definitely kabedon, but we’ll never see him do it, because that means the situation’s gotten a different kind of serious.

Ibuki: has too much self-control and dignity to say “fuck,” but said it when he was younger. Doesn’t kabedon because it’s just...not the right vibe for him.

Todoroki: has considered saying “fuck,” but the prospect makes him blush. Cannot kabedon to save his life but desperately wishes that he could.

Zanki: comfortable with the word “fuck” but uses it sparingly. Doesn’t seem like a kabedon type.

The Children: Asumu, Kyosuke, and Akira can all definitely say “fuck” just by dint of being high schoolers brimming with all kinds of messy emotions. Kyosuke would definitely attempt to kabedon someone, although he might not do it well.

The Tachibana Sisters: anyone who runs a restaurant can say “fuck.”

Kabuki: like Miyuki, above, is included because I adore him, even though he’s a movie-exclusive character. Definitely says “fuck.” Might kabedon in the process of tricking someone, but wouldn’t do it seriously.

Kabuto

Tendou Souji: feels that saying “fuck” is beneath him. Wouldn’t kabedon so much as he’d very gently brace himself against the wall and lean in, which, let’s be real, is much sexier.

Tendou Juka: you know that comic that people have done all those redraws of? I think this one is the original? This is an accurate representation of what would happen to someone, possibly Kagami, if Juka said “fuck.”

Kagami Arata: is all the time saying “fuck,” at least in his head, but doesn’t often say it out loud because it would draw the wrong kind of attention. Would kabedon Souji, probably, who would be surprised and then quietly delighted.

Kusakabe Hiyori: unlikely to say “fuck,” and if she did I suspect Tendou would take it badly (see above entry for Juka). Might be kabedon’ed, but would definitely knee the perpetrator in the groin.

Kamishiro Tsurugi: my beautiful son does not know what the word “fuck” means, but would definitely kabedon because he’s excitable.

Yaguruma Sou and Kageyama Shun: get one line because they do things together--imagine, if you will, Yaguruma saying “fuck” and Kageyama echoing him quietly a moment later. They would also kabedon together.

Kazama Daisuke: would say “fuck” very quietly. Does not kabedon.

Den-O

Nogami Ryotaro: cannot say any swear words without suffering a potentially fatal nosebleed. May have kabedon’ed once in a dream, but the thought of him attempting it in real life is actually laughable.

Hana: says “fuck” as an adult. As a child, says it more. Does not kabedon, because why bother?

Naomi: can do whatever she likes and I will support her.

Momotaros: says “fuck” regularly and with gusto. Kabedons as a greeting.

Urataros: does not use any curse words because women find them off-putting--unless the woman he’s with swears, in which case he does too. Will kabedon if it is situationally appropriate for getting laid.

Ryuutaros: see, again, this comic, but this time the person doing the shocked face and then later the punching is me. He does not know what a kabedon is.

Kintaros: is probably asleep. Believes that excessive swearing is unmanly. Doesn’t see the point of kabedon.

Sieg: believes that excessive swearing is unfit for a prince, but will very occasionally say “fuck” if it’ll get every eye in the room on him. Unaware of kabedon.

Kiva

Kurenai Wataru: does not.

Kurenai Otoya: does both, vigorously.

Asou Megumi: says “fuck,” doesn’t kabedon. Would encourage someone else to kabedon her though.

Asou Yuri: absolutely says “fuck” all the time, might kabedon Otoya to shut him up.

Jirou: I actually don’t think he swears? Definitely kabedons though.

Nago Keisuke: says “fuck,” but feels bad about it afterwards. Might kabedon from anger, or if induced to by Megumi.

Nobori Taiga: is far too polite to say “fuck,” but occasionally thinks it. Does not kabedon.

Decade

Kadoya Tsukasa: there is no question that he says “fuck” all the time. Not the romantic kabedon type, much to Daiki’s disappointment. May kabedon in other situations, though.

Kaitou Daiki: says “fuck” only occasionally, but with feeling. Would like Tsukasa to kabedon him.

Hikari Natsumi: says “fuck” regularly and energetically. Will sit on Yuusuke’s shoulders to kabedon Tsukasa.

Onodera Yuusuke: does not say “fuck” at all. Cannot kabedon because he is too busy giving Natsumi a boost.

W

Hidari Shoutaro: believes that saying “fuck” is unbecoming of a true man, but still says it if he stubs his toe. Kabedons unintentionally and then blushes when he realizes what he’s done.

Philip: has said “fuck” a total of once and then went down a rabbit hole looking into its etymology. Kabedons intentionally and with forethought, and then completely loses the thread of things as soon as Shoutaro starts blushing.

Narumi Akiko: says “fuck” just to shock Shoutaro. Definitely kabedon’ed Terui at least once, which he was unspeakably charmed by.

Terui Ryuu: is not open to questions about whether or not he says “fuck.” Only kabedons out of frustration.

OOO

Hino Eiji: neither says “fuck” nor kabedons.

Ankh: both says “fuck” and kabedons, and both are generally directed at Eiji. In fact, since he is only a hand, kabedon is an important part of his physical vocabulary.

Izumi Hina: does not say “fuck.” Would break a wall if she kabedon’ed, and thus it’s fortunate that she isn’t inclined to anyway.

Gotou Shintarou: would blush terribly if he ever said “fuck,” or for that matter if he attempted to kabedon.

Satonaka Erika: considers the word “fuck” an important part of her vocabulary, to be used sparingly. Kabedons Gotou, and at least once Date.

Date Akira: says “fuck,” but not in, like, an aggressive way? Just as an expression of mild distress. It does not occur to him to kabedon.

Fourze

Kisaragi Gentarou: is not legally allowed to say rude words. Would kabedon out of an excess of enthusiasm and then be deeply confused if the recipient blushed.

Sakuta Ryuusei: says “fuck” sparingly and only when it’ll have an impact. Does not kabedon.

Utahoshi Kengo: says “fuck” frequently and with enthusiasm. Doesn’t see the point of kabedon.

Jojima Yuuki: like Gentarou, is not legally permitted to curse. Kabedon would not occur to her unless it could be some way related to space.

Kazashiro Miu: says “fuck” occasionally. Kabedons when appropriate, which is rarely.

Daimonji Shun: wishes he could say “fuck,” but can’t quite bring himself to.  Doesn’t kabedon anymore, but he used to.

JK: only says “fuck” deniably. Strictly a receiver of kabedon.

Nozama Tomoko: doesn’t use curse words, she uses curses. Doesn’t kabedon, but appreciates it when she sees others do it.

Wizard

Souma Haruto: definitely says “fuck” sometimes. Prefers a flirtatious lean against a convenient wall over kabedon.

Nitoh Kosuke: says "fuck," but only if his grandma can't hear him--unless there's a notable archeological discovery in the offing, in which case all bets are off. Thinks he's too slick to kabedon, but he's not.

Fueki Koyomi: no.

Nara Shunpei: absolutely not.

Daimon Rinko: has said "fuck" on occasion and would certainly do it again. I can't imagine a kabedon from her though.

Gaim

Kazuraba Kouta: seems like he secretly swears kind of a lot. Does not kabedon because he is, at base, a deeply non-aggressive individual.

Kumon Kaito: says "fuck" at least once a day. Absolutely kabedons, but mainly because he's annoyed and slapping a person seems tactically unsound.

Kureshima Mitsuzane (Micchi): says "fuck" to sound edgy. Would like to kabedon but no one would take it seriously.

Kureshima Takatora: will use the word "fuck" sparingly, and only to indicate that The Situation Has Gotten Bad Indeed. Does not know what kabedon is.

Sengoku Ryouma: says "fuck" occasionally, and with malicious good cheer. Does not kabedon, but if he would like to give it a shot, I am available.

Takatsukasa Mai: says "fuck" quietly but with frequency. Doesn't see a good reason to kabedon anyone.

Oren Pierre Alfonso: only swears in French. Dismisses kabedon as a thing for callow youths, but despite this he did once have a heated dream of doing it to Takatora.

Drive

Tomari Shinnosuke: says "fuck" if he's hit his leg on a table or something, but in more serious situations he does not curse. I cannot possibly imagine him trying to kabedon, it's impossible.

Shijima Kiriko: doesn't swear as much as one might think; "fuck" is for special occasions. Will use a kabedon to get someone's attention.

Shijima Gou: says "fuck" all the time. Would like to kabedon, but hasn't found the right person yet.

Chase: does not swear. Does not kabedon--he's interested in human behavior but that's just nonsense.

Sawagami Rinna: is a professional engineer and thus uses the word “fuck” as punctuation. Might kabedon, but it’s unlikely.

Mr. Belt/Krim Steinbelt: mutters “fuck” quietly when Shinnosuke isn’t paying attention. Does not have arms.

Heart: has said "fuck" experimentally but didn't like the mouthfeel. Delighted by the very concept of kabedon but hasn't done it yet.

Brain: believes that swearing is a sign that you have nothing constructive, intelligent, or amusing to say. Provided Heart with the comics from which they both learned about kabedon, and since then the thought of Heart doing it to him has occupied his every waking moment.

Medic: has thought about saying "fuck" but isn't sure that she really wants to. Stole those comics from Brain and now she, too, would like Heart to kabedon.

Ghost

Tenkuuji Takeru: the thought of saying “fuck” has genuinely never entered his head. More someone who is kabedon’ed than someone who does it himself.

Fukami Makoto: can theoretically say “fuck,” but mostly doesn’t. Would maybe kabedon if the moment seemed appropriate.

Alain: thinks saying “fuck” is sort of uncouth but does it anyway. Wants to know what kabedon is, please tell him about it.

Tsukimura Akari: does not get enough sleep or lab time for anyone to be able to stop her from saying “fuck.” Has kabedon’ed out of excitement, but never for romantic reasons.

Yamanouchi Onari: tries not to say “fuck” because he’s supposed to be setting a good example, but sometimes it just slips out. Definitely doesn’t kabedon, but that’s more out of cowardice than a sense of restraint.

Fukami Kanon: see the comic previously linked to for reference for what would happen if Makoto found out that someone had taught Kanon how to say “fuck.” Reads comics in which there is the occasional kabedon, kind of wishes Alain would do it.

Ex-Aid

Hojo Emu: doesn’t say “fuck” because he works with children. Doesn’t kabedon because it’s not his style.

Parad: absolutely says “fuck,” if only to see Emu drop something in surprise. Thinks kabedon looks fun.

Kagami Hiiro: is too uptight to say “fuck” and too shy to kabedon.

Kujou Kiriya: uses “fuck” as an expression of low-key dismay. Does his best flirting from across the room, but might kabedon if it seemed like the reaction would be entertaining.

Hanaya Taiga: barely even thinks of “fuck” as a word, it’s just a noise he makes when he’s annoyed. Kabedon’ing would require him to get much closer to people than he wants to.

Dan Kuroto: definitely says “fuck,” are you kidding? Even before he was a cackling supervillain he was, at least partially, a software engineer. Does not kabedon.

Poppy Pipopapo: no.

Saiba Nico: says “fuck” all the time as long as Taiga’s not looking. Will not admit to reading the kind of comics where a kabedon might occur, but definitely does.

Graphite: thinks all of this is human nonsense and yet is, despite himself, intrigued.

Build

Kiryuu Sento: probably says “fuck” more than any other main Rider. Yes, even Tsukasa. Is kabedon’ed.

Banjou Ryuuga: says “fuck” because MMA guys have foul mouths, although he did clean up his language a bit when Kasumi was still alive. Kabedons.

Isurugi Misora: if Misora says “fuck” then something terrible is about to happen. Would laugh at anyone who asked if she knew how to kabedon. Would knee anyone who tried it on her in the groin. Kazumi knows this well.

Takigawa Sawa: considers the word “fuck” an essential part of her vocabulary, to be used frequently and sometimes at a great volume. Knows how to kabedon due to spy training but does not use it in her personal life.

Sawatari Kazumi: says “fuck” all the time, unless Misora is paying attention to him. Thinks that kabedon is very sexy and that he’s very good at it; mileage may vary on whether this is actually true.

Himuro Gentoku: says “fuck” softly and solemnly when something really bad has happened. Maybe he kabedons, I’m genuinely not sure.

Evolt: probably does both, but I’m not getting close enough to check.

Zi-O

Tokiwa Sougo: doesn’t swear because it’s not kingly. Does not kabedon.

Myoukouin Geiz: surprisingly, does not tend to curse. Definitely kabedons, not always romantically.

Woz: doesn’t say “fuck,” because there are more roundabout ways to express his frustration. Kabedons, sometimes for romantic reasons and sometimes just to be weird about things.

Tsukuyomi: specifically uses the word “fuck” to indicate that things have gotten serious. If Geiz isn’t going to get around to kabedon’ing her, she’s going to do it to him.

Zero-One

Hiden Aruto: look obviously I can’t really comment on these characters because I haven’t watched that show yet but just from the clips I’ve seen I think Aruto would spontaneously combust if he said “fuck.”

Saber

Kamiyama Touma: says “fuck” sometimes, especially if he’s very tired. Thinks kabedon is kind of a tired plot device.

Sudou Mei: doesn’t think saying “fuck” is that big of a deal, uses it to express irritation. Agrees with Touma that kabedon is overused as a plot device, but likes it nonetheless.

Shindo Rintarou: oh my god no, definitely not.

Fukamiya Kento: uses the word “fuck” the way other people might use the word “moist”--it’s not a word he likes to say, but it has its place. Not generally aggressive enough to kabedon, but might if it seemed useful.

Akamichi Ren: is a teen edgelord and thus says “fuck” a lot. Talks a big game, but is secretly too shy for a successful kabedon.

Ogami Ryo: has tried to clean up his language since becoming a dad and been pretty successful with it. Doesn’t kabedon anymore, but did once.

Daishinji Tetsuo: says “fuck” when he’s working on things. Kabedon generally involves prolonged eye contact, so no.

Sophia: good heavens no, can you imagine?

Tassel: might be a divinity of some kind, can swear if he wants although he’d probably do it in French, but if he kabedons then I’m a walrus. I love Tassel.

All right, that’s Kamen Rider done! Now on to...

Super Sentai

AkaRed: if AkaRed ever said “fuck” I think something in the multiverse would be profoundly damaged--oh, hell, this is how Zenkaiger happens, isn’t it?

Dairanger

Ryo of the Heavenly Fire Star: doesn’t say “fuck,” but you might when you taste his gyoza. They’re the best in the world, you know. It has never occurred to him to kabedon.

Daigo of the Heavenly Illusion Star: is too gentle to say “fuck,” or for that matter to kabedon. (Besides, anyone who tries to kabedon Kujaku is going to be in for some difficulty.)

Bullet Shoji, Warrior of Love: used to say “fuck,” because he used to be in a gang, but doesn’t anymore. Doesn’t kabedon because he tries not to intimidate people.

Kazu of the Heavenly Time Star: doesn’t say “fuck,” he just kinda makes a hiss noise if he’s irritated. Doesn’t object to kabedon in theory but not interested in doing it himself.

Rin of the Heavenly Wind Star: does sometimes say “fuck,” much to her uncle’s dismay. Does not kabedon.

Kou of the Howling New Star: is a horrible child and says “fuck” regularly. Too immature to be allowed to kabedon.

Kakuranger

Tsuruhime: does not say “fuck,” because if she’s mad she can just smack someone. She is fairly sure that people don’t actually kabedon in real life.

Sasuke: has said “fuck” once or twice but mostly tries not to. Too friendly to kabedon.

Saizou and Seikai: get one line because they’re attached at the hip. They are too goofy to say “fuck,” and would only ever manage to kabedon each other.

Jiraiya: not only does he say “fuck,” he will actually be saying “fuck” and not a Japanese equivalent, because he is more comfortable speaking English. I cannot imagine this man attempting to kabedon.

Ninjaman: is tremendously excited to learn about modern cursing, but never actually uses the words he’s learned because his teachers would be mad at him. Naturally too large to practice safe kabedon.

Hurricaneger

Please know that I’m not very far into this series yet, so this is based on fairly early impressions.

Shiina Yousuke: does not say “fuck” but often wants to. Doesn’t kabedon because it seems really aggressive, especially if you’re trying to kiss someone.

Nono Nanami: sometimes thinks the word “fuck” but doesn’t say it. While she’s read a few comics which contain kabedon, the thought of putting the concept into practice has never occurred to her.

Bitou Kouta: would never say “fuck” because children might hear him. Doesn’t kabedon because he’s a gentle soul.

Kasumi Ikkou and Kasumi Isshu: I just met these boys last night but I know in my heart that they both say “fuck,” and moreover they mean it. They also definitely kabedon.

Furabijo and Wendinu: can call me, please, I’m apocalyptically in love with you both.

Gekiranger

Same as Hurricaneger--I’m not that far in, we don’t even have the extra guys yet, but I sure do have some thoughts about the folks we’ve got so far.

Kando Jan: doesn’t even know the word “fuck,” probably has some cute repetitive term for sex that he uses instead. Doesn’t know what a kabedon is either.

Uzaki Ran: may say “fuck” very occasionally if she sustains an injury during training. Not inclined to kabedon.

Fukami Retsu: will pretend that he’s too in control of himself to swear, but does on occasion say “fuck.” Sees no reason to kabedon.

Mele: says “fuck,” but never when Leo can hear her. Doesn’t kabedon, would like someone else (*coughcoughLeocoughcough*) to do so though.

Leo: says “fuck” like he’s chewing on something and spitting it out. Definitely kabedons, but has no idea that this might have romantic or sexual implications.

Shinkenger

Shiba Takeru: does not say “fuck” anymore, because once he said it in front of Jii, who lost his mind. Could kabedon, he’s capable of it, but he’s a little too wound up in himself.

Ikenami Ryunosuke: would never say “fuck.” Not a kabedon type because it seems rude.

Shiraishi Mako: used to work with children, and thus didn’t say “fuck” for years, but now does occasionally--mainly while cooking. Doesn’t kabedon because she has other ways of getting in your face.

Tani Chiaki: is a Gamer and thus definitely says “fuck.” Nonetheless, respects women too much to kabedon them and the only men he might kabedon he is slightly afraid of.

Hanaori Kotoha: is a sweet, precious girl, very dear to my heart, who certainly does not swear or kabedon.

Umemori Genta: only says “fuck” if he cuts himself while preparing fish, or while arguing with fish vendors. Might kabedon to be goofy, but never seriously.

Kusakabe Hikoma/Jii: definitely had kind of a wild youth. Takeru once heard him say “fuck” to a kuroko while working on the clan accounts and has never recovered from the shock. Doesn’t kabedon anymore, but he did once.

Shiba Kaoru: doesn’t actually know the word “fuck” or anything about kabedon, and isn’t going to learn if Tanba has anything to say about it.

Gokaiger--one of the ones I’m sure you’ve all been waiting for

Captain Marvelous: I think we all know that the answer is yes on both counts.

Joe Gibken: says “fuck” quietly in serious situations, and loudly if Marvelous is deliberately getting on his nerves. Does not typically kabedon.

Luka Millfy: uses “fuck” as a general intensifier. Likes guys she can intimidate a little, so she does kabedon, but she mainly does it to Doc and Gai.

Don Dogoier/Doc: if you hear Doc say “fuck” it’s probably the middle of the night and he’s repairing an engine problem. Certainly does not kabedon.

Ahim de Famille: cursing is unladylike--not that she always tries to be ladylike, but she just doesn’t see the point there. Doesn’t kabedon.

Ikari Gai: probably uses some sort of goofy minced oath like “fudge” unless in the actual throes of passion. Doesn’t really have the poise to kabedon.

Basco ta Jolokia: only says “fuck” when no one is listening, because otherwise he might seem less than poised. Would kabedon Marvelous to get a rise out of him.

Go-Busters

Sakurada Hiromu: seems like he’d probably drop the occasional “fuck.” I’m of two minds on the kabedon thing; I think that he could, but I’m not sure that he would.

Iwasaki Ryuji: says “fuck” if he’s working late on some problem. Doesn’t kabedon because he doesn’t want to scare people.

Usami Youko: says “fuck” specifically because it gets Ryuji to make a shocked face at her. Might kabedon if she found someone short enough. She will never find someone short enough.

Nick, Gorisaki, and Usada: no, definitely not.

Masato Jin: says “fuck” with the casual manner of a man who has definitely not just dropped a wrench on his foot. Doesn’t kabedon, but has joked about doing so.

Beet J. Stag (the “J” stands for “Jueki”): says “fuck,” but doesn’t know what it means. Who would he even kabedon?

Enter: only swears in French. Would kabedon with one of his creepy tentacles.

Kyouryuger

Kiryuu Daigo “King”: is a ludicrously perfect shoujo manga love interest, and thus does not say “fuck” but does kabedon in a sexy way.

Ian Yorkland: says “fuck” on dig sites but not in polite company. Might kabedon if it’d make the girl in question smile, does not kabedon men.

Udo Nobuharu: used to say “fuck” sometimes, but doesn’t now that he’s helping to raise Rika. Too busy and tired to kabedon.

Rippukan Souji: is too uptight to do either.

Amy Yuzuki: doesn’t say “fuck,” just makes irritated noises. Might kabedon if it would get someone to stop screwing around and pay attention to her.

Utsusemimaru: is familiar with neither the word “fuck” nor the concept of kabedon, although he might learn about the latter from some of Amy’s manga.

Yayoi Ulshade: says “fuck” when she’s working. Perpetually disappointed that she will never get Daigo to kabedon her.

Candelira and Luckyuro: my beautiful wife and her adorable son have no knowledge of these things.

ToQger

Right, Tokacchi, Mio, Hikari, and Kagura: are all children and thus are barred from engaging with these things. Although I suppose now they’re all fifteen or sixteen, so maybe some of them have started cussing, but I refuse to contemplate it.

Nijino Akira: doesn’t know the word “fuck,” but if he did he’d use it. Doesn’t know about kabedon either, and wouldn’t use it if he did, because that involves getting way too close to people.

Wagon: much like Smart Lady, would kabedon with her leg, but in her case she’s trying to be cute and fun, not creepy. Does not say “fuck.”

Emperor Zett: can in theory say “fuck,” but hasn’t found an occasion to do so. Would kabedon to intimidate, I think he’d kinda puff up like a little angry wren.

Jyuohger

Kazakiri Yamato: will only say “fuck” if he’s just been bitten by an animal he’s taking care of, and even then only if it really hurts. Doesn’t kabedon.

Sera: doesn’t say “fuck” because there’s always something more cutting available. Would bite anyone who kabedon’ed her.

Leo: says “fuck” as long as there are no girls listening. Has been bitten by Sera at least once as punishment for kabedon crimes.

Tusk: says “fuck” about paper cuts, but nothing else. Doesn’t kabedon.

Amu: doesn’t say “fuck” because there are cuter ways to get mad. Doesn’t kabedon herself, but will take any kabedon from someone else as an opportunity to get them to do something for her.

Mondou Misao: says “fuck” sometimes, always apologizes directly afterward. Far too nervous to kabedon.

Bard: says “fuck” at least once a week. Isn’t clear on what kabedon is.

Uncle Mario: you leave Uncle Mario alone.

Kyuuranger

Lucky: does not say “fuck.” Might kabedon in a moment of high spirits.

Garu: is a polite man who neither says “fuck” nor kabedons.

Stinger: says “fuck” frequently. Kabedons with his tail.

Hame: says “fuck” quietly but often. Doesn’t kabedon, and would just vanish if someone did it to her.

Raptor-283: says “fuck” very rarely, but at great volume. Dreams of being kabedon’ed, this is canonical.

Champ: doesn’t curse, and thinks kabedon looks dangerous.

Spada: only says “fuck” in the kitchen, where he can say whatever he pleases, grazie. Could be kabedon’ed.

Balance: says “fuck” if he’s panicking, but only then. Might kabedon for fun.

Naaga Rei: doesn’t do either, and would be terribly puzzled if someone kabedon’ed him.

Shou Ronpou: said “fuck” once when he got his finger caught in the Kyuulette. Isn’t familiar with kabedon, but thinks it looks fun.

Kotaro: is ten years old.

Ootori Tsurugi: doesn’t say “fuck” because it’s not grandiose enough. Definitely kabedons, we see him do it at least once in the show.

LupinRanger Vs. PatRanger

Asaka Keiichiro:  might say “fuck” if he’s really angry, but would feel bad about it. Would blush if he kabedon’ed Kairi, but would still do it.

Yano Kairi: has been saying “fuck” on the reg since he was twelve. Would kabedon to make Keiichiro squirm.

Hikawa Sakuya: might say “shit” on occasion, but never “fuck.” Wishes he was the kind of guy who could kabedon.

Yoimachi Tooma: doesn’t say “fuck,” but does think it loudly. Too reserved to kabedon.

Myoujin Tsukasa: could potentially say “fuck,” but chooses not to. Not a kabedon type.

Hayami Umika: mostly has pretty clean language, but will say “fuck” when she’s sewing, especially if she’s just stuck a needle into her finger, which hurts like a bitch. Doesn’t kabedon herself, might giggle if someone did it to her.

Takao Noël: only swears in French, but does so in extensive and exacting detail. Kabedons, but in a chill way.

Zamigo Delma: thinks the word “fuck” is extremely funny. Would kabedon Kairi to make him uncomfortable, but if Kairi’s unavailable then he’s welcome to look me up.

Ryusoulger

Koh: has never said a swear in his entire life. Doesn’t kabedon.

Melto: says “fuck” often, but quietly, so that the others don’t hear him. Seems kabedon’able to me.

Asuna: doesn’t actually know the word “fuck.” Wouldn’t kabedon, like, on purpose? But she’d definitely do it unintentionally, please see this comic for reference.

Towa: will say “fuck” sometimes if his brother won’t catch him at it. Overconfident enough to kabedon, but I don’t think it’d occur to him.

Banba: says “fuck” if things have gotten very bad. Kabedons only rarely, when he needs to be very serious about something. Yes, sometimes that something is “I think about kissing you with such frequency that it’s interfering with my ability to focus.”

Canalo: doesn’t say “fuck” because Mosa Rex would be disappointed in him. Would never kabedon, if he even knows what that is, due to his overpowering Respect for Women. (It has never occurred to him that one might kabedon anyone but a woman.)

Oto: might say “fuck,” and if she did then Canalo would specifically blame Melto.

Nada: uses “fuck” as an expression of dismay, like, “well, fuck.” Not into the whole kabedon thing.

Tatsui Ui: might have said “fuck” once, but then was so embarrassed that she got a case of hysterical giggles. Absolutely does not kabedon.

Super Sentai is done! That was exhausting! Wow! On to...

Ultra Series

I have seen very few Ultra shows, so this section’s gonna be short.

Orb

Kurenai Gai: doesn’t say “fuck,” does curse in some kind of alien language. Doesn’t kabedon, I bet it’d make him blush, although mostly he doesn’t seem like the blushing type either.

Jugglus Juggler: says “fuck” regularly and with relish. Was once described by someone very wise as having “big kabedon energy,” which is to say, of course he does.

Yumeno Naomi: definitely says “fuck” and doesn’t care who hears her. Will kabedon Gai and Juggler simultaneously, one with each hand, and they will both be impressed and maybe a little turned on.

Hayami Jetta: says “fuck” sometimes, but not as frequently as he’d like people to think. Might try to kabedon, although he wouldn’t necessarily succeed at it.

Matsudo Shin: does neither of these things, as they have no relevance to science.

Geed

I can’t really say much about Geed, since we’re not even ten episodes in, but what I can say for certain is:

Asakura Riku: is too nice a boy to say “fuck” and not intense enough to kabedon.

Toba Laiha: definitely says “fuck” on occasion. Would kabedon with her sword.

Pega: is a child.

Igaguri Leito: does neither of these things, he is a sweet man. And I think Zero would disapprove.

Fukuide Kei: says “fuck” with frequency. I think he would, theoretically, kabedon, but there’s no one on Earth he’d do it to.

Belial: I haven’t actually, like, met Belial, but I’m fairly sure his existence is a concentrated dose of the word “fuck,” in the sense of, “oh, fuck, it’s Belial.” If he kabedon’ed he could destroy the planet, please do not let him.

R/B

I’m even less far into R/B, since I’m watching it by myself.

Minato Katsumi and Minato Isami: they do not.

Aizen Makoto: is too weird to do either of these things.

All right, we’re done with the brief foray into the Ultras. Now, last but very much not least, we have...

Garo

Of which I have only watched the original continuity, none of the Ryuuga stuff yet, so it’s a slightly limited take. However, I love all of these characters dearly, so here we go!

Saejima Kouga: is way too upright (and uptight) to say “fuck.” Doesn’t know what kabedon is, wouldn’t do it if he did.

Suzumura Rei: is a man who swears colorfully and at length and uses “fuck” to add a little bit of pep to things. Definitely kabedons, with varying levels of success depending on who he’s trying it on.

Fudou Leo: is a soft-spoken man, but nevertheless does occasionally mutter “fuck” quietly when he’s working on a Madou device. Blushes and stammers at the very suggestion of kabedon.

Mitsuki Kaoru: might say “fuck,” but only in the absolute heights of fury, which are rare for her. Not inclined to kabedon, but even if she was, who could she even do it to? The shortest person she might kabedon is Rei, who is seven inches taller than her, and it only gets worse from there. She’d need a boost to reach, and my dude Gonza’s back is not good enough for that.

Jabi: believes too strongly in the value of language well-used to say “fuck” except when absolutely necessary. Could kabedon with her leg, probably, and would if she thought it’d be useful.

Rekka: says “fuck” sometimes, mostly to express irritation. Most likely to kabedon with a knife or something.

Saejima Raiga, Mayuri, and Crow: I only barely know these kids but I adore them. None of them are allowed to do any cursing. They do not kabedon.

Madou Ring Zaruba: is a ring, so obviously he can’t kabedon, but he can say “fuck,” and I think sometimes he does.

The Moral Of This Story Is: never ask me for a comprehensive list of anything, because I cannot be trusted to do anything but go completely overboard.

[virusinfected-memes]

ANIMAL CROSSING SERIES SENTENCE STARTERS ;

80 starters. Sentences come from all the mainline Animal Crossing entries, and also includes quotes from the spin-off titles Happy Home Designer and Pocket Camp. Feel free to change words and pronouns as needed!

“Never underestimate the value of being just who you are. Life isn’t about being extreme all the time.”

"Sometimes, all it takes is a good friend to remind you of all the things you like about your life...”

“Ack! I lost! My hopes...smashed to bits like some kind of... I can’t even think of an appropriate analogy!”

“It’s a gross world. And I wanna rescue you from it.”

“No, I mean it. I had tacos for lunch. So enjoy the fresh air while you can.”

“But I did learn one thing from the experience. I’M STUPID!”

“Stick to chocolate and comic books. You’re too young for love anyway.”

“It’s always teatime somewhere.”

“You’re looking awful as ever. Who dresses you?”

“Sometimes I like to flush the toilet and just stare into the bowl. It’s kind of relaxing.”

“Please don’t question my driving or parking skills. You couldn’t begin to understand the level I’m on.”

“Did some new, totally rad Nintendo game come out?”

“You’re a little obsessive, aren’t you?”

“Sometimes I think I’d make a pretty darn good househusband. Who knew?”

“Oh, no... No matter how much time passes, I can’t forget him!”

“No matter where you live, one thing stands true... Life costs money.”

“Wait... You weren’t ACTUALLY trying to give me trash for my birthday, were you?”

“Okay, so don’t tell anyone because I’m not proud of this, but I was a little thirsty and kinda desperate.”

“I think I dropped my house key somewhere. That was my favorite key... It opened my house.”

“You filthy ogre! I hope you get stung by a thousand bees!”

“I just feel like life is all rainbows and flowers lately.”

“I’d tell you what I was dreaming about, but I’m not sure you can handle it. How old are you?”

“Um, I asked for something cool...and this is not it.”

“Even though you bug me sometimes, I don’t ever want to fight with you.”

“Rivers...are just fish roads.”

“_____?! What are you doing up?! It’s past your bedtime!”

“I’d offer you something to eat, but I don’t want to. Hey, it’s my house. Get your own food.”

“Explore all the things that make you happy now, and you’ll discover what you really want out of life later.”

“C’mon! Say something amazing! Treat me like a pretty princess!”

“If you ever need anything, anything at all, and I can do it without moving from this spot, just ask.”

“Shut up! You lookin’ for a fight? No? Then back off, buddy!”

“Hey, how about you letting me spend the night tonight?”

“Since I can’t cook, I just played Super Chef RPG IV for 24 hours...”

“You know what? I thought of you the other day, and it filled me with warm fuzzy feelings! For the record, I was also thinking about puppies, so you were in good company.”

“You can just forget about being friends with me!”

“It’s good to appreciate the times when you’ve got nowhere to be and nothing to do.”

“Yeah, exercise is totally hard and stuff. I think I’m gonna go take a nap and read a book or whatever.”

“Planning to do some post-midnight mischief? Yeah, me neither.”

“Do you need someone to share a snack with you? I’ll share a snack with you!”

“Ya ever just feel like cryin’? Me too!”

“We meet people, get to know them, and then they get up and leave us behind.”

“I don’t know if I told you this, but I’m allergic to bad vibes. When they’re nearby, I can’t help but... ACHOO! Oh, no! Bad vibes in the vicinity! This is not a drill!”

“Weeds are just flowers that no one thinks are pretty. That’s sort of depressing, isn’t it?”

“A joke for my birthday?! Nobody’s ever gotten me a joke before! The only thing is? This joke...IS NOT FUNNY! IT’S GARBAGE!”

“It’s kinda weird how being irresponsible with money can be rewarding, isn’t it?”

“You’re already mature for your age. My suggestion is to just be yourself. Don’t change to impress others.”

“I resolve to focus less on others and more on what really matters. ME!”

“Time to worry about an insignificant conversation that happened 15 years ago!”

“I used to be so focused. But now it’s like I just can’t...you know...do...stuff.”

“WHAT’S GOING ON?! THE RAGE! IT’S TAKING ME!”

“You are SO going to lose all of your friends if you keep acting like such a complete steakhead.”

“I’ve learned that you can’t get too connected to the people in your life.”

“I gotta admit, I really love that one show where all those people do the stuff and then something happens.”

“Just because two people are good friends doesn’t mean they’d make a good couple.”

“I was happy at first. But then I cried. And then it was kinda okay. But then I totally cried again.”

“The shortest route to getting something done is to just do it!”

“If you get scared, don’t hesitate to leap into my arms! I won’t be able to protect you in any way, but it might look cool.”

“NO ONE EVER UNDERSTANDS ME! I’M HUNGRY ALL THE TIME AND NO ONE CAAARES!”

“Whenever we talk, I feel like there’s a lot more going on inside you than you ever let anyone see.”

“Hi. I lost my voice. I was trying to be a heavy-metal singer. Instead of a pop star... I am SO not metal.”

“You’re just like a BABY! Waaah! Waah! WAAAAAAAH! Feed me! Feed me! I’m a wee baby!”

“Even the peppiest of people feel blue sometimes. It’s a sad fact of life.”

“Believe it or not, I feel like I’ve known you for a long time.”

“But I’m already pretty cute already... So, even cuter clothes might be...um...overkill.”

“After all, I’m beautiful, but I am also...deadly.”

“Even when I didn’t see you in real life, you made special guest appearances in my dreams!”

“You think my lips are cute? Why, do you want me to smooch you or something?”

“Wanna know something sad? There are some things about places you just don’t realize until you leave them.”

“If you don’t stop pushin’ me, I’ll be forced to break out the bicep canons!”

“I used to get taller on birthdays. Now I’m usually just wider.”

“I don’t like seeing you hurt, even if it’s just pretend... I can’t help that I care about you so much.”

“I’m terribly sorry, but nature is not always family friendly!”

“I’m soooooooo broke! Whaaaaaaa!”

“I guess I just went into fight or flight mode, you know? Only my “flight” is more like “cry.”

“Should we invent something? Destroy something? Invent something that destroys things?”

“Sometimes your heart tells you when you’re in love. Your tummy too. Both can sure make you sick.”

“You want another one? That seems a little greedy, don’t you think?”

“An apple a day keeps the doctor away. An onion a day keeps everyone away.”

“I really watched my...language...here today. I’m not usually quite so...you know, so polite.”

And remember that bad times...are just times that are bad.”

[davidmann95]

Comics this week (11/25/2020)?

Anonymous said: This week's floppies?

Anonymous said: This week’s comics?

Anonymous said: Have you read Red Hood #51 yet? It’s one of the best stories Jason has been in since Under the Red Hood and I don’t think I can go back to his normal stories after this

Anonymous said: God damn the Other History of the DC Universe has a pretty brutal call out of Superman, yet as a Superman fan I wasn’t offended or put off by it at all. Ridley specifically narrowed in on one of the key flaws of Superman, his need for public love and approval. What did you think of the portrayal of Supes?

Anonymous said: Thoughts on "The Other History of the DC Universe" and why it's already one of the greatest comics of all time?

Anonymous said: Thoughts on "Other History"?

X-Men #15: Heck yeah, Quiet Council discussing protocol, this is what I come to Jonathan Hickman’s X-Men for, and Cyclops getting his Captain America in Hickvengers moment.

X of Swords: Destruction: Look this rules and I guess I understood the Arakko story by the end but not the Otherworld/Captain Britain stuff, and it’s the former that’s gonna matter to Hick-Men going forward. But I don’t care if it put a ‘_ of 22′ counter across the top, if a crossover is for real going to demand you buy 22 comics in 3 months for you to see the entire core story you need to be screaming that from the rooftops with every single interview that it’s genuinely the whole thing that’s essential, because editorial claiming that you should totally get everything aside that’s not how crossovers have actually worked since the 90s no matter how many checklists and reading orders may be provided. This whole thing really sorta felt like the Infinity of this run, good stuff but ultimately Hickman serving a master beyond telling his own story - in this case trying to provide a forcible on-ramp from Marvel’s hottest book to all the ancillary related stuff.

Shang-Chi #3: This continues to be a really solid little mini with some poignant bits.

Power Pack #1: Haven’t read much if anything with them in it before, but as good as I could have hoped of Ryan North’s first post-Unbeatable Squirrel Girl Marvel gig.

Fantastic Four: Antithesis #4: Fine, but it would have been so much funnier if Waid’s last Marvel work before finally returning to DC had been that cancelled Squadron Supreme two-shot.

Daredevil #24: God so goooooood. And next issue’s next week?!

The Department of Truth #3: Imagine going literally any duration back in time, handing this to someone who’d read and even enjoyed his work, and explaining “THAT’S the level James Tynion is going to end up operating on”.

BANG!: My shop got the TPB this week of the recent mini by Kindt and Torres, and this is a top-notch reimagining of assorted 80s action/pseudo-pulp archetypes into something modern and strange and delightful, that while technically concluding somewhat tidily if the sales aren’t there is set up to go on for as long as the creative team has ideas for it. It taps into that America’s Best Comics/Planetary/Adventureman energy for a slightly different branch of genre storytelling, and even if like me it’s not an iteration you grew up with it’s definitely worth your money and attention.

Dark Nights: Death Metal: The Multiverse Who Laughs: It’s fine, whatever, just a buncha little Dark Multiverse stories...except for the last story, where the Twilight Zone-esque shocker final twist is that being black in America and thereby constantly experiencing the constant low-grade terror of the background radiation of systemic racism essentially acts as a vaccine against Scarecrow’s fear toxin, which...okay??? It’s written by a black man so it’s not as if I think it’s offensive, but particularly given that given the rules of the Dark Multiverse one of the three characters in there had to have imagined this possibility, and that then The Batman Who Laughs must’ve seen it and gone “Hell yes, all about this, definitely one of the 52 scariest of all possible universe”, it’s a serious candidate for weirdest comic of the year.

Legion of Superheroes #11: This is an excellent kickoff to a 3 or 4-issue arc so I have absolutely no idea how it’s going to reach some kind of season finale next month.

Action Comics #1027: Romita Jr.’s deteriorating by the day but I did like his take on the Phantom Zone, and I feel like this while taking it a bit farther than I’d prefer still convincingly sells the idea of Superman just being absolutely fed up after a truly awful day.

Justice League Dark #28: So is this the end of the run, Future State notwithstanding? Shocking how coherently it held together through the transition in writers, and I really hope it says and so does Ram V to take it in a direction wholly his own.

Wonder Woman #767: Substantially improved now that it’s not working off the completely bizarre and increasingly uncomfortable ‘buddy-cop’ premise.

Red Hood #51: GOOD NOW?! I checked it out because of the rec above and because I was curious how someone would try and salvage the concept post-Lobdell, and while it obviously isn’t literally by him, Shawn Martinbrough and Tony Akins are for all the world doing a Christopher Priest Relaunch with this tonally and aesthetically; I think it’s even a direct sequel to Priest’s Batman: The Hill oneshot from decades ago. I sure hope this isn’t a two-issue filler run with the book either cancelled or reshuffled after Future State, because this has all the makings of an excellent crime comic.

Suicide Squad #11: I’ll probably check out Taylor’s Revolutionaries book once that happens, so I guess mission accomplished. Fine little run.

The Other History of the DC Universe #1: I heard someone on Twitter say this is the best thing that’s come out of superhero comics since HoXPoX, and I don’t know if I’m on that level with it but that is absolutely a fair conclusion. I’ll be honest, I had measured expectations here from having seen some of Ridley’s past comics work - I figured it’d be a perfectly solid book with a few standout moments, but instead it throws out all the haymakers in the world and emerges as one of my favorite comics of 2020, even given we’re only seeing the one issue this year. I can only judge so much because it feels like a lot of what we see in this debut is going to be completely reframed through the perspectives of other characters in subsequent entries, but standalone this is a brutal, intimate, brilliant character study set against the backdrop of a hazy dreamscape vision of the history of DC reformatted as needed to fit the concerns in play here (though the dates presented are so specific I wonder if aspects of this are leftovers of the original version of 5G), and probably as close as we’re going to see to a ‘trilogy capper’ to The Golden Age and New Frontier. That’s why the take on Superman here works, as much a product of the worst of his mass-consciousness image as the Superman of DKR but meshed with a profound understanding of what makes him tick as a character that makes the inherently compromised version on display here palatable, and a believable extrapolation of the Silver/Bronze Age’s version of him when that’s the era this series is thus far working as a contrast to. And god, the art. I always liked him fine enough, but even with finishes by Andrea Cucchi and colors by Jose Villarrubia I never could have imagined Giuseppe Camuncoli putting out the likes of this, and Steve Wands’s lettering is doing at least equal legwork in defining the look of the book. There have been several impressive titles out of Black Label at this point - Last Knight on Earth, Rorschach, Strange Adventures, and especially Harleen - but nothing else has come close to demonstrating the potential power of the imprint as a vehicle for creators taking this iconography and doing something radical and unrestrained and phenomenal with it.

[monkey-network]

Good Stuff’s Best of 2018

WARNING: I just want to say cheers to you for making it through another year. I send you best wishes for next year to be fruitful. Thank you, take care out there, and enjoy.

Dedicated to Stan Lee, Stefán Karl and Stephen Hillenburg, the number ones of children entertainment

Bow Whacka Wow, playas and players. 2018 gave us quite a lot to consume while society continues to fumble like a Tumblr update. While hopefully the chaos has died down for the final weeks of the year, I’m counting down the best cartoons/animations I’ve seen and loved this year in no particular order. Only two rules, no sneak previews of future projects (sorry 101 Dalmatian Street and MP100) and no potential entries from last year’s list (sorry True). With that said, roll it....

10. UNIKITTY!

I love the Lego Movie. I’ll potentially like the sequel. I like Unikitty. She got a show, and it was a great show to start off the year. Upbeat, colorful, off the walls sometimes, perfectly capturing the spirit of the eponymous character. I’m glad the other characters are just as enjoyable, I never get tired of the theme song, every episode had me smilin’ one way or another, it’s just a quality bottle of positivity juice. Don’t know how else to explain it, Unikitty, the show and character, just makes and continues to make me smile.

9. POP TEA-- SIKE!

This anime ain’t nothing but unfunny randomness and skits with a forgetful arc in the first and final episode. I don’t get it, never gonna get it, so I don’t want to get it! MORE LIKE POOP TEAM EPIC, ‘nuff said. Which is why the actual number nine is....

9. BOB EPIC TEAM

Honestly, there is something endearing about the way Bob Epic Team presents itself. The simplicity and variety of its animation is remarkably good and makes it feel timeless sometimes. The comedy works in a way that gives you a clear grasp on the two characters while letting them do whatever they want. The surrealism of this is fun to think about, showcasing a hedonistic philosophy that rivals that of Epicurus. The duo’s chemistry is what especially got me, as they felt like the best of friends, potentially love birds *wink wink*. This anime was just creative in every sense of the word and, like Unikitty, it was a great anime to start of the year.

8. CRAIG OF THE CREEK

The ska is RAH. I honestly find this to be the loose spiritual successor to Hey Arnold and Recess. Like the playground, the creek is a well fleshed out setting with the many characters that hang there, from the TAZ trio to the loving witches of the creek. Though I will say the best episodes are when we get insight on the main three’s personal lives with their families and when the characters themselves go through a personal trial to understand themselves a little better. The shows thrives in the theme that the creek is a place where you can enjoy getting your hands dirty and work towards something you want, even if it doesn’t add to any concrete long term benefit beyond learning a thing or two about yourself and others. And I say for somebody that relates to Craig as a character, that’s a welcoming thought that the show has yet to perish. And the ska is a welcome choice of music, IMO.

7. THE EPIC TALES OF CAPTAIN UNDERPANTS

It’s funny in how a little over a year of getting a movie, Captain Underpants gets an animated series with not only original stories in lieu of just animating the already printed stories, but puts it all in a format similar to reading a book with a sardonic narrator and separating the plot of the episode into chapters with subtitle cards; one of the first I’ve seen do this. But really, a “Captain Underpants cartoon” is something I can’t say would turn out bad, and I’m right as this is a show that revels in what made CU great in the first place. George, Harold, Melvin, and Mr. Krupp/Captain Underpants are all great characters with the additional supporting cast providing welcome life to the world. Every Incredible Violence Chapter is brilliant in their own right, and while I wasn’t a fan of the ending they had for the season, it’s great that almost every episode is self-contained, boosting its replay value. Honestly, any compliment I have for this was already said in my review of this and the movie, so I’ll just say this too was faithful to its source material and benefited heavily for it.

6. GARY AND HIS DEMONS

Rick and Morty done better. BOOM, send tweet! It is safe to say that this was quite the sleeper hit and I can’t help but say it’s lowkey one of the best adult cartoons this year next to Ballmastrz and Final Space. And while I certainly appreciate the other two *hint hint* this one got a step above on the grounds that it works as a comedy and a solemn tale of a chosen hero that stumbles through years in the office life. It’s improv humor feels natural and it can be as melancholic as Bojack Horseman without making it all too deep like so; has a great balance of both. Main man Gary, unlike Rick for the most part, is a guy that’s both reasonably reprehensible yet pretty relatable. Not to mention, while it was bittersweet, it had a very satisfying finale to where I feel like this was a complete series all together. With a rough art style that compliments it’s tone, this was a series that surprised me in its sharp quality.

5. APPLE & ONION

I’ll admit. Initially wasn’t a fan of it as it felt like a knock-off to Regular Show (may it rest). Just had a duo of bros living together, doing mundane labor while coming up with impromptu tunes along the way. Then again, I was gladly proven wrong because the charm of it generally being a simple show, even with every person being food, somehow more regular than Regular Show. Every song they make is upbeat and catchy, all of the characters are endearing, and with only 10 episodes, each one was well paced and had quality writing to the point where I teared up a couple times. It stinks that this and Summer Camp Island have generally been receiving the shaft this year after their premieres, but I'm just glad that they haven’t been truly forgotten by CN and are getting more episodes next year. Plus, I love food and this show is about food. Debate over.

4. LEGEND OF THE THREE CABALLEROS

I was familiar yet never saw The Three Caballeros, ironic since Donald is one of my favorite Disney characters. But then, out of the blue, I found this and I was stunned, amazed, confused, nonetheless invested. It has a bumpy start, but it’s a joyous adventure from that start to end. The look of it is something I’ve rarely seen in animation since... freakin’ Wakfu. I love Xandra and I was glad to see her be an active player on the team. The villains are such a hammy delight. And Jose and Panchito were very lively and entertaining foils to Donald’s cynic nature while all three work as well together like the 3 stooges. Donald himself gets a great arc of his own throughout the season. And the theme, HO MY GOD I LOVE THIS THEME! It’s a damn shame Disney hasn’t released this already (since it’s all online already) because this series is much better than it has any right to be.

3. GOLDEN WIND/VENTO AUREO

I say, the beauty of Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure is that regardless of what part you start from, you’re enthralled into its world and ya feel compelled to dig into it more. Parts 3 was what got me into Jojo, like most I bet, but it was part 5 that got me “Oh yeah, this series [just] works on more than level”. The characters are what keep me hooked, regardless of Crunchyroll refusing to give their stands proper English names [Zipper Man, CR?], Fighting Gold and Freak ‘n You will never get old, and David Productions putting great effort into the small details and giving life and style to the original manga. I’ll just say, as one who’s read and loved the manga, this anime has not ceased to keep me impressed and guessing for more.

2. INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE

Funking superb, you afro having web-slinger. I hate to say it, but 2018 didn’t have the most impressive line-up of western animated features. Most were average, entertaining sure, but nothing felt like 110% was given. Until Spidah-Man came on the scene and I was like “WIG...

The only major problem I have with this film, besides a bit of slow pacing, is more of a missed opportunity where the stakes of getting the Spidermen back to their dimensions before dying felt like an afterthought. Then again, that’s ALL I have for problems. It looks fantastic. The action is smooth, coherent, and satisfying to see. The tiny details and comic book aesthetic of it was a blessed touch. I loved almost every character here. Nick Cage and John Mulaney. The fact that it has so much yet was able to juggle it all blew my mind. Even the post credits scene made this such a love letter to the wall-crawler. This film was refreshing to say the least and the central theme behind the idea of Spider-Man made this as great of a superhero movie as Infinity War and Lego Batman. Just saying, this better make its budget back and THEN SOME. It deserves it.

1. HILDA

Netflix, we’re not on good terms mind you, but ya done did it again. This is honestly one of the few shows that I genuinely took my time with as opposed to binging it, because binge watching is a devil in itself. Like the Spider-verse movie, it got the style of its source material down to cozy colored T with its autumn color palette and etched lining in the characters. Like the Captain Underpants series, while having a grounded arc of Hilda journeying through the city life and her colliding wildlife, each episode can be generally be enjoyed on their own. Like Gary and His Demons, it felt like a complete season and the fact it’s getting a season two made things all the better. But above all, it was a generally peaceful yet captivating fantasy cartoon to watch with incredible animation, an endearing main character, amazing looking folk creatures of all sizes and powers, and a cuddly deerfox for a pet. I say this is to the fall what Harvey Beaks was to the spring, and if I can compare a show to Harvey Beaks you know you’ve achieved greatness. Like True and the Rainbow Kingdom, gives you a moment of honest bliss and happiness that can influence your outlook on looking forward to better things because like Hilda herself, you push forward and have some fun exploring.

Just saying, I cannot stress this enough this is NOT my number one favorite show of the year, hell of all time. THAT goes to....

1. 👏TEEN 👏TITANS 👏GO, BABEEEEEEY!!

ONCE AGAIN, Teen Titans GO reigns supre-- Huh, what’s that? Oh my god, you’re serious?! The Number One is

TOTAL DRAMARAMA OUT OF NOWHERE! IT IS NOW CARTOON NETWORK’S ‘NEW FAVORITE SHOW’.

THE STREAK *DING DING DING* IS OVER

[fluentlanguage]

How To Start Teaching Yourself a Language: 10 Simple Tips For Success in Language Learning

Do you dream of learning another language, but you’re not quite sure how to start?

Maybe you’ve recently downloaded your first language learning app, but you’re not quite sure how to go from screen to reality.

Or if you learnt a language in the past and want to refresh your skills, you’re wondering if the world has anything new to offer besides weekly evening classes at the community centre.

Congratulations to you! This is an exciting time. If you’re feeling curious but confused about how to teach yourself a language, this is the right article for you.

Today I have 10 simple tips that will make starting your new language a total success and help you stay motivated for many months and maybe even years. They’re perfect for beginners, or learners who need a fresh burst of inspiration.

Let’s get started:

1. Tidy Up Your Mind

Have you heard about the life changing magic of tidying up? I mean that Marie Kondo book and Netflix show. In Marie Kondo’s world, the simple act of letting go of your less exciting stuff is a way to improve ALL of your life. And that advice works for language learning too!

Before you saddle yourself with the new project of learning another language, it pays to tidy up your mind.

Start with a simple list, asking yourself: “What do I believe about my language learning abilities right now?”

Once all the beliefs are out on paper or screen, examine each one to find out which ones are actually useful to you. In Marie Kondo terms, find the ones that spark joy and throw out all the others. Your brain will be clutter-free and ready for a positive new start!

2. Write a Note for Future You

As you’re currently reading this article, you are probably excited and keen to jump into learning your new language. This is awesome! Let me ask you one more question:

What are your reasons for learning this language?

You have got to know your reasons and hold on to them, because the world is going to start getting distracting. Textbooks and evening classes make lots of assumptions about why you’re learning.

For example, if you’re truly in Japanese class because you love manga, you’ll soon get bored of a textbook for busy travellers. When that happens, it’s easy to assume that you have lost your love for everything in the language.

So make sure you are prepared and do write down what motivates you, and once you get bored you’ll have a letter to open and remember where your true North is pointing.

3. Get Great Gear

Every new project deserves some gear. Runners buy shoes, knitters buy wool, and language learners buy notebooks, dictionaries, textbooks and other delightful things.

If you’re someone who loves to start a new project with an optimistic shopping excursion, go ahead and indulge! For tips on what and how to buy, read No More Hoarding! How to Organize All Your Language Learning Resources.

And to save a bit of money, don’t forget that libraries and second-hand shops always stock a few shelves of language resources that you can use.

4. Get More Than One App

Beyond your paper resources, your smartphone is an amazing language learning tool. The most famous language learning app you might know is Duolingo, but don’t stop there. Download three, four, seven apps to help you learn. Why not!

Every language learning app uses a slightly different system. Get yourself a whole range of different apps to test drive and make it your goal to find out which one’s the most enjoyable.

It’s easy to start ignoring one app’s notifications when you’ve broken the streak. In fact, my advice is to switch notifications off completely as they can easily make you feel bad about your progress when you’re actually doing well.

For a few tips on how to select a good app, see How to Find a Great Language App.

5. Read a Story

Research has shown that learners who learn by reading and listening to lots of interesting input at the right level can learn languages up to six times faster than those who study rules and textbook dialogues.

The trick here is to find something you’re interested in: perhaps a fun short story (like in my German Uncovered course), a video game, comic book, or a song.

Don’t be afraid to immerse yourself in something you only half understand, see if your brain can start seeing any patterns, and make best friends with your dictionary.

It’s surely challenging, but you’ll be amazed at just how much you can learn just from enjoying something you love.

6. Research Music

There are so many cool ways of using music for learning a language that it deserves its own place in this list. You can start by searching online for artists that make your favourite style of music in their language (rap and hip hop are amazing for this), or by investigating local music styles.

Then just hit play and enjoy. To go a little further, you can start reading the lyrics or researching artist interviews. Feeling more ambitious? Attend a concert!

7. Express Yourself NOW

Most people think that they have to wait until they have studied for 50+ hours before they can start expressing anything meaningful in another language. But what if you could flip the script and START by expressing yourself right away?

The trick here is to realise that you don’t have to do this by writing a perfect essay. Expressing how you’re feeling can start with something as simple as one word (“hungry” - “tired” - “headache” - “curious” and so on) and it will help you learn the most relevant and important vocabulary you could ever wish for.

Your act of self-expression can be long like a diary entry or short like a tweet. You can make it by creating a colourful art collage, or by writing the same word in 20 different pens. If you’re feeling brave, you can even share your creation online or record an audio diary.

What matters is that you signal to yourself that you’re ready right now, instead of having to wait for some kind of future level.

8. Make Daily Contact

While I’m on the subject of avoiding anything that makes you feel like you’re “not good enough yet”, I have another tip that has served me fantastically well with every language I’ve taught myself since I left full-time education:

Make daily contact with the language.

That’s all. No need to study 200 flashcards every day or go through four Duolingo levels. What you want is contact. Switch the radio on, watch a video, say hi to a friend, read a page in a book, do a grammar exercise, it does not matter.

Daily contact is the foundation on which you can build a solid language routine without feeling like it’s driving you around the bend.

9. Use Social Media for Language Learning

Most of the time, we think of social media as a distraction and a waste of time. But there’s another way of looking at it.

Follow accounts that share content in your target language, and you’ll instantly have a cool and relevant library of interesting stuff to study. As you get better and feel confident, start making comments in your target language and creating your own posts.

For more specific tips and a list of the best social networks for language learning, check out this list of 17 tips.

10. Try It All

Last year, I interviewed listening expert Cara Leopold for the Fluent Show, who shared this simple lesson on what works well in language learning:

Everything works.

No matter which product you buy or which blog you read, they all have something that will work. The key is finding out whether it will work for you. (“The Miracle Morning” is certainly NEVER gonna do it for me, for example.)

Try Flashcards, try vocab lists, try immersion, try podcasts, try everything that looks interesting in your target language.

Even if you find that it doesn’t work so well for you, it’s unlikely to break your language skills completely.

What Works for You?

Have you tried any of these 10 tips for learning another language? Are you just feeling inspired to add these to your routine?

Leave a comment below to join the discussion - I’d love to hear what works best for you.

Bonus Tip: Build a Language Habit

Habits are the key to building a lasting change and long-term achievement into your life. For language learners, making your study into a habit is just the best. It means you no longer question everything you do and clear the path to just getting on with what you want to accomplish.

I’ve written a short guide taking you step by step through establishing your own healthy language habit, which you can get for free by joining the Fluent Language email newsletter below.

[jamesnbarnes]

i did something bad

Pairing(s): Steve x Bucky

Summary: College AU.

“Steve Rogers has not thought about Bucky Barnes for years. That’s a fact. He could be dead for all Steve cares. And Steve definitely does not care.”

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: Lots of cursing and mutual pining

Notes: This was requested by a lovely anon. I hope you enjoy, friend! I had a lot of fun writing it. Why do my shorter fics always end up being fics I could turn into longer narratives? Of course, if you’re interested in seeing this become a longer fic, shoot me a quick message. I’d love to hear your thoughts. Comments are always welcome. 

Requests: currently open!

Steve Rogers has not thought about Bucky Barnes for years.

It was the summer before they left for college. It was the classic Friday night lights tale. Steve and Bucky were legendary. Steve was the top wrestler who was graduating at the top of his class. Bucky was the quieter type, the best damn artist in his graduating class and a total biology geek. They nerded out together over everything from comics to Star Wars to random TV shows that no one ever watched except for them. They were the golden children of their high school. They were the kids that were going places. No one knew Steve without knowing Bucky. No one talked to Bucky without asking how Steve was.

It was how things were. It was the way they used to be.

They kiss one night in Tony Stark’s backyard.

It ruins them.

“Did we just-”

“You know what, I don’t-”

“I’m drunk, yeah?”

“Yeah, me too.”

“You know what- I’ll call you tomorrow Buck, yea? I just need to, uh-”

“Y-yeah.”

“Okay. Cool. Umm. Congrats on graduating.”

“See you around.”

The call never came. That was the end of Steve and Bucky. People asked a lot of questions. Steve deflected them all. He got a text later on that night from Tony, saying “did you know Barnes was bi?” Steve’s heart is pounding almost worse than his head, and he shoves that factoid deep down where he barely thinks about it.

Steve Rogers has not thought about Bucky Barnes for years. That’s a fact.

He could be dead for all Steve cares.

And Steve definitely does not care.

Bucky comes back into Steve’s life on a random Wednesday. It is the worst day of Steve’s life.

Steve hates biology. He hates it more now that Bucky is out of his life, but he has never enjoyed the subject anyway. He’s in this stupid Biology 101 lab course that has nothing to do with his major. If he had done better on his previous exams, he could have tested out of it, but he’s stuck now. He’s barely making a decent grade, and he doesn’t have the motivation to work any harder than he already is.

Everyone is checking the project rosters on the board outside the lecture hall. When Steve finally clears the crowd to look for his name, his heart drops when he sees the name next to his. Panic wells up in his chest. It’s not fucking possible for James Barnes to be here, at this university, in the same fucking entry level biology lecture class section as Steven Rogers. 

The world is out to get him, Steve decides. He can’t focus the entire lecture. He doesn’t take a single note. He doesn’t even pick up his pen.

“You should check the boards outside for your partner project pairings. Everything is due a week from Friday. You can find the specific project outlines and what I expect from your teams on my website. If you have any questions, I have about 10 minutes before my next lecture. If not, I’ll see you next class.”

Steve is one of the last people in line. Dr. Fitz starts packing up his things while answering the question asked by the student in front of Steve. Finally, the man walks away, looking far more confused than he was before he asked. Steve steps up to his desk, readjusting his backpack where it’s slung over his shoulder.

“Hey, Dr. Fitz. I just had a question about the project pairings you posted outside your door?”

The professor sighs, continuing to pack up his belongings in order to change rooms for his next lecture. “I did them by last name for pretty much everyone, Steve.”

“Dr. Fitz, we’re nowhere near each other when alphabetized by last name. Please” Steve adds, desperation in his tone. Dr. Fitz just shakes his head.

“Sorry son. It’s just for the next few weeks. If you work fast enough, you won’t have to deal with him that much. You and Barnes both added this class late so you’re not organized on my roster like everyone else. You can do it. I’ll look forward to your presentation.”

He walks away, leaving Steve with his jaw slightly unhinged.

Fuck.

Steve gets a text from an unknown number as he’s walking across campus to his next lecture.

Hey, it’s B. Got your # from the redhead who sits behind you. Library at 15:30 to work on project?

Steve sends him a thumbs up emoji and hopes it’s enough to get his point across.

Sitting across the table from Bucky Barnes is something Steve never expected to be uncomfortable. Yet here he sits. His body is rigid and he can’t seem to relax his brain. They sit in silence for a long time. Steve can’t help but think that Bucky looks good; healthier than he did when they parted ways.

Bucky coughs quietly. It’s probably just because he swallowed wrong, but Steve takes it as an invitation to a conversation between the two of them.

“How the fuck did you end up here, anyway?” Steve blurts. Bucky doesn’t seem fazed in the slightest, slouching back in his chair.

“I transferred after last semester. State ended up being a shit hole,” Bucky says, not making eye contact. “The people had no passion. They just partied and drank and stuck their dicks in each other. I didn’t care for it.”

“Really?” Steve says, feigning shock. “That didn’t appeal to you at all?”

“You’re a fucking asshole,” Bucky states simply. “Now did you research the shit I told you to? It’s gonna be pretty hard to fuck this project up if you just follow my lead. I know biology was never your strong suit.”

Bucky really has gotten so kind as he’s gotten older. “Yeah. I already sent you the Google Drive file. It’s even organized alphabetically so it’s easier for you to understand.”

“Well aren’t you kind,” Bucky deadpans. Steve snickers.

Time passes as they both work in silence. Bucky’s nervous fidget has always been bouncing his leg. He starts to do it without even noticing. Steve is trying so hard to ignore it, but it gets to be unbearable. His screen won’t stay in place and he can’t keep his hand study while he’s trying to make sense of these jumbled up equations Bucky is having him memorize.

"That's starting to get annoying," Steve says finally.

Bucky coughs. He turns another page in his book. “I don’t remember caring.”

Something inside Steve snaps. “Fuck’s sake, Barnes, cut me some slack, okay? This isn’t even in my damn major. I’m just trying to get through this project with a semi-decent grade so I can get the fuck away from you and continue living my life like you don’t exist.”

That fucks Bucky up more than he would like to admit. “Wow Rogers, I really messed you up, huh?”

Steve doesn’t look at him. He’s shaking his leg nervously too, just like Bucky, pen tapping against the yellow pad of paper filled with scrawny notes and equations that don’t make any sense.

“You didn’t do shit to me.”

“So we didn’t kiss that night at Tony’s party,” Bucky asks inquisitively, feigning genuine interest.

Steve’s jaw drops slightly. “Shut up. That was years ago.”

“I said I didn’t remember. I lied.” Bucky knows the confession is damning in a way he could never imagine.

Steve can’t deal with this now. He can’t. It was bad knowing Bucky was on the same campus as him. It made his skin buzz in weird places; he’d get a shiver up his spine while in the line for a sandwich only to look up from his phone and discover Bucky had just walked into the dining hall. It’s worse thinking about the time they shared together in high school. All of the inside jokes, the late night gaming sessions, the cramming sessions in the library the morning before midterms, the way the teachers always put them in the same group together because that’s just the way things were.

But it is absolutely unbearable to think of how good it felt to kiss his best friend, the hot, humid summer air enveloping their bodies, pushing them close, how desperately Steve wanted to whisper ‘more’ against Bucky’s lips, the way Bucky’s hands were gripping his hair, always trying to pull him closer, like he couldn’t get enough of how perfect-

“Bucky. Stop. That was a long time ago. I don’t have time for this now.”

Bucky’s eyes flash dark. “Of course you don’t. I should have figured. You were always the tough guy, yeah?”

Steve doesn’t know how to respond.

“Always wanted to be a fucking hero,” Bucky spits. “Fuck if I care. I came out as bisexual that summer. Did you?”

Steve looks down at his laptop. That cut deep. Bucky knows it.

“Fuck this. I’m over it. I’ll finish the presentation and paper and print everything out for class Friday. I’ll send you your slides so you can make your note cards. Otherwise, you can fuck off.”

It’s not exactly fair to leave Steve like this. They both said things over the course of the conversation that weren’t fair. It’s safe to say that they probably shouldn’t leave things here, naked and bare and out in the open with no resolution in sight, but Bucky is either going to kill Steve or kiss the shit out of him, and the choice is too alarming. He has to leave.

Bucky gets up from his seat, shoving the loose papers and notes strewn across the desk back into his backpack. He closes his laptop and slides it into his case before slinging his bag over his shoulder and skulking away.

Steve hadn’t noticed it before, but Bucky had torn off the Star Wars rebellion emblem sticker. Steve had bought them both one their sophomore year when they were at the height of their Star Wars fandom.

Steve still has the matching one in the upper right-hand corner of his. It’s worn and tattered, hanging on by a mere thread in some places, but still there. Steve imagines that even when the adhesive has long worn off, an imprint of the symbol will forever remain. 

What a shitty metaphor for his life right now.

[saints-row-2]

people have been saying that bcs Doomsday Clock is Rorschach II and not original Rorschach that its going to be dealing with people who idolise Rorschach and see him as a hero when like fucking obviously hes a terrible person and you can kinda see that if the “Rorschach’s journal” entries are intentionally badly written poor imitations of what someone think Rorschach might say instead of the writers just not being good at writing Rorschach 

and like i like that concept a lot bcs if youre going fucking shit on human decency and force out a fucking Watchmen sequel you might as well respond to one of the biggest phenomena that has come out of Watchmen fandom: people who dont fucking understand Watchmen or understand Rorschach and think hes Good Actually. but like. 

we dont know anything about Rorschach II currently or who he is or why he decided to become Rorschach but the one thing they did choose to establish about him is that hes a black man. and like, this is the first fucking issue we have no possible way of knowing how this is gonna play out but like. bear with me ok. if youre going to make a character whos meant to explore the fans who idolise Rorschach it feels like... a mistake to overlook the fact that the majority of those fans are straight white men. 

a note here; im also a white man i want to be yknow like.. open about that before i go on for another 5000 words about this. 

like when it comes to these guys like a huge part of why they love Rorschach is because he is a violent white man who is being hunted by the law for trying to uncover the truth and take a stand against society. Rorschach himself is undeniably a misogynistic nationalist and while he never (that i can recall) references race in any capacity in the comic he is a loyal reader of the New Frontiersman, which is a conspiracy theory filled rag of a paper we are explicitly shown has a largely racist, xenophobic audience. and those are the people who, if New Frontiersman published it (which Doomsday Clock seems to be implying) would be the ones who read Rorschach’s journal, which he sent to the paper.

and like. putting Rorschach’s own politics aside, the important factor is that projection. Rorschach himself seems to not particularly care about immigration or race, at least not enough to ever think or write about either (make of that what you will), but these people who love him project their own racism onto him. the people who idolise him in real life are a reflection of the New Frontiersman fans; people who believe society is degrading and that the degradation of society is hurting white men. to them, Rorschach is the personification of their white male hero, the oppressed white man who is trying to fight for the Truth thats being hidden by the... insert whatever fucking racial or ethnic class they hate here. the comic shows this as much in the New Frontiersman story they publish about Rorschach. 

the more and more i think about it the more hilarious it is how the New Frontiersman so directly fucking parodies the whole class of dipshits who idolise Rorschach. 

like my point is, if youre going to do a story about someone who was wrongly inspired by a warped idea of who Rorschach is, it feels like a mistake to overlook the inherent racial element that there is, particularly in a day and age when the violence of white men is still so fucking unquestioned. 

on the other hand entirely, if you ARE going to run with “people accept and love the violence of white men” then comparing and contrasting how people react to Rorschach II as a black man as opposed to Rorschach I as a white man could be very fucking poignant; will the exact same people still be willing to idolise and defend Rorschach’s actions if he isnt someone they can imagine to be their white defender? i can imagine almost fucking definitely not. because in their eyes, if hes not white, then he cant possibly be fighting for their warped vision of whats right. like theres an opportunity to make a really salient point here about the overt fucking racism of the people who idolise Rorschach and how society on a wider level is willing to support white violence. 

like at this stage we’re one fucking issue into Doomsday Clock so i have no idea if theyre going to bring racial politics into the comic at all. i wouldnt be surprised if they dont i expect absolutely nothing out of this comic but like. it feels like they have an incredibly real opportunity here to talk about the excused and acceptable violence of white men who have “beliefs” and itll be disappointing if they overlook it entirely. 

ok uh i dont actually know if anyone i know has even read Doomsday Clock or even remotely cares about Watchmen so i dont really know. why i made this whole fucking post but by the time i hit the 10000th word i had to just go with it. anyway i hope this post makes like. sense. if anyone can like. see the point im trying to make. 

[sloblesbian]

been doing a new years resolution & reflection post every year since 2014 so im gonna continue that trend. 

personally this was a really great year for me. it’s very weird. things are objectively bad. if you think too much about the future things start to fall apart. there isn’t anything to rely on, outside of my own ability, and that’s limited in what i can do without support. but. it’s not hopeless. i dream a lot of finally graduating and getting a job that will keep me more than just barely afloat, and of what that could mean for me... i won’t graduate for at least 2 year (i need 56 more credits-- i think after 2 years i’ll have 2 more classes to get in, unless i manage either some summer courses or 2 semesters of 5 classes, both of which are unlikely) and even then i know finding a job is hard. theoretically i could start now but i find it difficult to work 30 hours a week and go to school. i’m also afraid that i might make less at an entry level job than at my current job... but maybe this summer i will apply at some bookstores & libraries. 

also... i really love my girlfriend. she’s coming to stay with me for 2 weeks in march and i am so excited. it’s been a good year for us. every day i talk to her and she really understands and like, gets me you know? i am amazed and i fall in love some more. 

also i accomplished a ton in 2017. maybe not the things i set out to (i finished 1 sock that i started last november, lol, and the only short stories i read were a few online and for school) but i transferred to RIC. i only took 2 classes because i couldnt register till june but i got As in both of them and my gpa is a 4.0 which has never happened in my LIFE. i’m excited about the classes i’m starting this month, and after i finish spanish & anthropology i should only have english classes from then on out. i wouldn’t say i love my current job but it’s miles better than working in retail. it’s less stressful and while i’m generally working less hours i am making a little bit more. it feels necessary & helpful as opposed to being in an endless capitalism machine that only exists to grind me down for unreasonable standards. 

but i did read 100 books which was real touch & go for a while.. the first couple months of 2017 i barely read & felt like i had lost my ability to plow thru a ton of books, then the middle of the year i caught up & jumped ahead... fell behind, etc. i finished my last book on the 28th though. i read a lot of comics; my page count for this year is way down, but it doesn’t matter. that’s still damn impressive. 

and for things i didn’t plan at all but still accomplished: i wrote 4 pieces of fiction this year. i mean. they’re all fanfiction, which isn’t really something i even read never mind write, which i think is maybe??? sort of even more impressive? i’m going to try and write some original stuff in the coming year but like. right after nanowrimo, my friends and i, who were previously in the fictional coalition of writers who don’t write, uh, all started writing. which is great. but i mean. i started writing in february? march? i wrote a 10k word fic, and then a short follow up, a short pjo thing, and i wrote another 6000 words this month but it’s not on ao3 cause it’s like... a complementary piece to something that isn’t finished yet, lol. overall about 20k words which isn’t too much in the long run but i like that i wrote 4 completed pieces. it’s nice because i had sort of let myself give up on writing because... i mostly don’t enjoy it. i don’t like scrounging for ideas. but i do like planning things out enough, outlining what i want to happen, and then writing the whole thing. it’s like writing a list and then accomplishing it which... as u know, i love. as far as i can tell uhh most people don’t need to do this. i really have to know like. the end trajectory of a piece before i start writing. i don’t have to know every detail but if i am confused to where it’s going i can’t write it. i’m not great at ideas but i am good at making things happen. it feels nice to accomplish something creative, when i basically haven’t since i uhhh dropped out of art school. 

also, i wrote 47 reviews, which, damn! i (read: my bff & roommate mags) put up a new website, even if it is going to come down this month (i think. i wanna transfer everything first) and i wrote a review nearly every week and a lot of them were good. like. that’s a lot of writing, between fiction & what have u, what category do my dumb reviews fall under. 

(FOOD/DIET warning i dont wanna put it in the tags of the post just skip this paragraph) oh also i cut dairy & eggs (& also gelatin & honey, i guess) out of my diet, & i feel very very good about it (also i think i lost something like 20 lbs-- i don’t weigh myself but uhhh thats good thats very good). when i stopped eating meat in 2010 i lived with my mom & my intention was to one day go vegan but like... i didn’t want to put the strain on her & also i sometimes struggle with food things. but it’s gone really well. it’s nice. feel good. love to cook. very good at it. 

so like...... a really good year for me. here’s what i want out of 2018

i’m cutting my reading goal down specifically because i don’t think it’s something that can grow exponentially and i think the main reason i was able to accomplish it was because i didn’t have too much school this year. when i started setting goals for myself in 2012 my original goal was 50 books; that’s what we’re going back to.

every year (except 2016 when i was realistic) i told myself i would read more short stories & knit more. i’m hoping that having less to read (which i prioritize over all other hobbies) will give me more time. also i have a desk & a chair set up which... idk... helps? i put some knitting stuff there & grafted the toe of a sock the other day, so i hope it does, at least. i read a short story yesterday so i hope that’s a portent for 2018. i want to finish the time travelers almanac at least. i have a lot of collections and i do enjoy them. it’s just easier to get through novels than anything else. 

if u follow my twitter you have probably heard me say this but: 2018 is the year of the video game for me. im, uh, terrible at games- im fairly certain i have dyspraxia, at least mildly (im wildly, wildly uncoordinated)- but for a while i was playing a few because i had done it enough that i had gotten better..... well, this year i played persona 5, which i really loved like. more than any video game in a long time. i know a lot of people were disappointed with aspects of it (rightly so) but i had never played another persona game so i think that probably shaped my opinion some, and also, i think p5 dealt with issues that i really love to see in fiction & generally don’t, even if it ultimately dropped the ball. anyway. it kind of revitalized my interest, and i want to play more. i have p4 that i want to get through. i never finished usum. i have a bunch of games on steam & mags let me sign into their steam library too & they have about 400 games (thats not an exaggeration). i wanna replay me2&3 for sid. i want to practice so i can play games that are more difficult than i usually do. (mass effect being the sole fps i can play, usually i can only play very linear rpgs (think pokemon & dragon age) and uhhh puzzle games, god i love puzzle games) 

so, more concretely:

read 50 books

try to read more short stories

knit more

play video games

do well in school

that sounds good. happy new year.

[mymusicalitylove]

Dive

In my feels. Trying to be productive and direct them in a positive way.

The other night I feel like I broke because the latest disappointment (that I created for myself), came to the surface. I took a hot shower, cried and told myself to let it all go. Hardest I have cried in a long time because I replayed a lot of scenarios about this endless loop I seem to be stuck in: I give up on this notion called ‘love’, discard it and begin to focus elsewhere.. then along comes another unsuspecting fool that says all the right things to get me twitterpated and caught up in the fantasies my brain creates. I get sucked in and think, ok, maybe this will go somewhere.. just to BAM! Slam my face into a wall of unending disappointment. Wash, rinse, repeat. It feels as though this scene has been on replay about eleventeen times over these last few years, and all I can say is: How. Fucking. Stupid (Who is the REAL fool? Ya, that’s me).

I went to bed after my therapeutic shower and slept ok, but kept waking up. I finally decided to get up and be productive, and had Ed Sheeran’s “Dive” stuck in my head. Hadn’t heard it in a while so I’m not sure where it came from, but it stayed with me the entire morning. 

My entries on this thing almost always relate to music and how the lyrics relate to my life. I’ve saved some drafts with songs I’ve wanted to write about later. When I realized I wasn’t going back to sleep, I decided to write; I checked my drafts and whoa.. “Dive” was already on there.. I don’t even remember saving it. 

(Despite there being a few too many typos for my taste in this post above, I feel it, Rising Woman!)

September 2019 is the most notable time I can remember starting the self-destructive cycle. My boss left at work and I decided I needed to do something to change my life up. I put all my energy into planning my amazing sabbatical in Italy. Everything was set up; all the wheels were in motion for me to see Europe, do me selfishly, and not worry about shit! In my mind I put together plans of sightseeing, concerts, volunteering, gymming, wandering, and getting lost in the country I fell in love with a year prior.

In October on a night out with friends, I met an EMT at a bar. He worked his bullshit game, and did it well because he was intriguing. He made me feel good over a two hour convo that honestly felt like a first date, and convinced me to give him the digits (which I don’t freely give to strangers). Too bad the man never called. Womp, womp.

After a taste of those vibes I craved that “feeling” again. I tried a dating app again for a couple months. In a comical turn of events, said dating app matched me with this same EMT! This presented me with the opportunity to call his ass out, and incidentally feel validated as to why it actually was better he never called. Talked to a few other guys on the app, but really can only report on a couple stupid funny anecdotes of just how sad it is that guys don’t know how to talk to women anymore. At least this time I wasn’t taking it seriously and only did it for shits and giggles. Decided okay, just keep focusing on plans for Italy, stacking that paper, and looking forward to the new year (*point and laugh at the idiot who had no idea what 2020 had in store!*). 

In January a boy (with a girlfriend) who I’d had innocent flirtation vibes with for a while tells me he’s now single. I had already placed him in the “not gonna happen” folder, and his confession obviously began a different wave of chemistry and banter for months. We had a conversation about the reality of where I am/what I’m ready for, and where he’s at/what he’s not ready for. Oh, and in the midst of all this, Covid hits and I have to make the heartbreaking decision to cancel Italy and deal with the feels of defeat that followed. And let’s also add all the sadness of being stuck with only me, myself and my thoughts in quarantine.

One last convo in April with “previously not gonna happen” sealed the deal of this endless string of flirtation not going anywhere and back in that folder he went. I then decided to give my number to this other guy who had shown interest a while back (but I hadn’t paid him any mind cuz I was stuck on folder guy). New dude didn’t really engage, so I disregarded him again, and worked on rearranging my place, organizing, decorating, spring cleaning and purging. Fast forward to now, it’s June and new dude comes back to work, asks to hang out, we have a great first “date” lasting three hours, and now here I am less than two weeks later wondering what happened. New dude: MIA / Me: WTF?

I truly do not understand why this cycle continues. Each time I feel like I get closer to something real, just to be lead into feeling like a fucking moron. I can’t stand it anymore, and it honestly makes me want to go back to being guarded and jaded, but I know that’s not the right way to find anyone. So I open up and allow some level of vulnerability, even though I’m scared af cuz of how hard I fell five years ago with the man I thought I was going to marry.

This is gonna hurt, but I blame myself first

'Cause I ignored the truth

Drunk off that love, my head up

There's no forgetting you

You've awoken me, but you're choking me

I was so obsessed

It was a matter of time

But you are the fire, I'm gasoline

Gave you all of me, and now honestly, I got nothing left

'Cause I loved you dangerously

More than the air that I breathe

Knew we would crash at the speed that we were going

Didn't care if the explosion ruined me

Baby, I loved you dangerously

I learned a lot from that short but impactful relationship. It was the love of my life and I went into it with complete abandon. I loved him dangerously. Things felt “right” and escalated quickly, which lead to our demise because we did not explore all the things before going full force into a relationship. We mutually thought this was “it” and talked about the future we would have. It completely broke me to end things, and upon rebuilding the pieces of me, I promised myself I would never rush into things like that again. 

I know that I do it to myself, but I guess I don’t know how else to do it. If I’m closed off and guarded, I’m not welcoming anything in; if I’m open and vulnerable, I start to dream in fantasyland with expectations just to be let down and end up inevitably disappointed. I clearly don’t know how to find the balance that works and it has become maddening beyond words. 

I need to find that balance, and it would be a lot easier to find in non-Covid times where I could have something else to focus my precious energy on, rather than wanting to find “my person”.

Maybe I came on too strong

Maybe I waited too long

Maybe I played my cards wrong

Oh, just a little bit wrong

Baby I apologize for it

I could fall or I could fly here in your aeroplane

And I could live, I could die

Hanging on the words you say

And I've been known to give my all

And jumping in harder than ten thousand rocks on the lake

So don't call me baby unless you mean it

Don't tell me you need me if you don't believe it

So let me know the truth

Before I dive right into you

And I've been known to give my all

And lie awake, everyday don't know how much I can take

I could fall, or I could fly here in your aeroplane

And I could live, I could die

Hanging on the words you say

And I've been known to give my all

Sitting back, looking at every mess that I made

This new dude made me really feel this. I tend to fall, and fall hard because I am so ready to give my heart to someone. But I need to put on the brakes and slow my damn roll. 

I can’t keep getting my hopes up. That is ultimately my problem. I tell myself to not have expectations and I do well to begin with, then have an amazing connection and am fed (what is obviously) bullshit and fall for it like a moron. I have grown thicker skin this time around, so at least there’s that.. but hopefully this has been my last lesson. 

I have found a new diversion for my focus and just put in my first offer for a new home! This will be my new passion project and will take up my thoughts and energies for a while, so as freaked tfo as I am, I am equally excited for this new venture. If it’s meant to be, it will be, and if it’s not, my new little home is out there somewhere not ready for me yet. 

06/19/2020 - 11:51 PM

[megacircuit9universe]

Self Driving Economy?

This entry is gonna sound a bit out of place, but with the subject of AI having just been touched on at the same time that the economy, and specifically, fears of a coming recession have been in the news... well, I have a theory that maybe is worth exploring, even if it turns out to be wrong.

I’m old enough to have experienced several recessions in America, but by far the two worst... and the two which most affected the course of my life, were the Dot.Com Bust in 2001, and then the Housing Bust which hit full force in 2008.

Before the former, during the Dot.Com Boom, all well respected economic authorities were honestly out there saying there was no reason the economy couldn’t keep growing forever.  And when that bubble burst (in early 2001, months before 9/11) it really took everybody by surprise.

In retrospect, everybody saw that all the booming internet start up companies everybody was scrambling to invest in, lacked any plan for turning an actual profit. The internet was still too much of a wild west, and... like the actual wild west... sparked a kind of gold rush that for many, did not pan out.

But, that was okay because there was still one reliable thing that everybody could invest in, whether the economy was booming or busting... good old real estate!  Home equity!  Always keeps growing over time... like a law of physics.

And while the broken Internet economy slowly nursed itself back to health for five years after 2001... everybody got really hyper about houses.  New ones were being built. Old ones were being flipped. And mortgage loans became easier and easier to get for more and more people...  and home values began to dramatically inflate.

That modest old bungalow on the East side, which had taken many decades to get to where it was worth a modest 60K, overnight went up to 90K, then 120K.... just sitting there... without being renovated in any way.

It got to the point where any shoebox sitting on any plot of dirt was worth 100K automatically, and everything else was correspondingly overvalued across the spectrum, and across the country.

Once again, economists weren’t too worried.  Maybe they seemed a bit less ecstatic than during the Dot.Com Bubble, but they weren’t super worried.

Until, BLAM!  Housing prices suddenly began to slide for the first time in seventy years... which began happening in late 2006... leading to the big bank collapse two years later in the Fall of 2008.

So, I’m gonna stop here and make the analogy of the economy being like a car.

Like a car, it’s a complex machine with a lot of moving parts that performs best when it gets regular maintenance... is well oiled... and has plenty of fuel.

But also like a car... if it’s being driven by a drunk... or a maniac... then the rest doesn’t matter, because it’s going to crash.

So in 2001, the car crashed... and it was a pretty bad accident.  And in 2008, it crashed even worse... actually bursting into flames and requiring all kinds of first responders to put out the fire, and do a ton of damage control.

But since 2008, something’s been different...  since 2008, the car has driven longer and faster than in it’s whole history, without a crash, or even a minor fender bender.

and weirder still... over the past two years, with history’s worst President at the wheel... the drunkest of drunk drivers... the stock market has been plunging and peaking, plunging and peaking.... like a crazy roller coaster ride... and yet... it never crashes.

Most recently we just had what they call an “inverted yield curve” which... in this analogy, is basically a loop the loop... but we did not fly off the rails.

And, knowing as I do, how fragile the economy used to be... not just in the early 2000s, but all through the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s... this weirdly unshakable stability is not just new... it's beyond belief, and should not be possible!

Unless... this is an upgraded car, that now has more safety and self-driving features than ever imagined before.

Hmmmm...

Now, clearly if such self-driving features exist, they were not put there by legislation... I mean... they did try to pass some legislation in the Obama years to keep a crash like 2008 from happening again, but most of that got watered down or actively repealed in years quickly to follow.

Rich people hate regulation, and are famous for never learning their lessons, after all.

But legislation is not the only form of regulation... there is also just... administrative policy... namely, in Obama’s case, policies that once again favored science and technology... as well as global economic integration.

Clinton era policy, in the late 1990s, gave us the World Wide Web to begin with, but it was early on Obama’s watch that we saw the advent of the smart phone, which, transformed the internet all over again, as well as technology in general... and both on a global scale.

This, in turn, not only globalized the economy like never before, but created whole new avenues for it to explore.

In the early 1990s, you were paid with a paper paycheck that you deposited at the physical bank and then... you kept track of your bank balance in your checkbook or in your head.

If you wanted to buy something you got in your car and spent the day shopping the different stores to see what they had and who had the best deal.

The biggest convenience you had back then was your ATM card, with which you could get cash to pay for your thing at the cash register, before lugging it home in your vehicle.

By the early 2000s, you probably had direct deposit, and could do your banking in real time on the desktop PC at home.  You could pre-shop the stores by going to their websites, before getting in the car, and you also had a debit card that functioned anywhere the same as cash.

But that was nothing compared to what was possible in the twenty-teens.

Now, thanks to a hand held device 1000 times more powerful than my 2001 desktop PC, that I carry on my person wherever I go... and thanks to an economic infrastructure which has entirely grown around that device... I can bank wherever I am... I can shop, and purchase nearly anything wherever I am standing, and have it delivered to my doorstep... and I can also give my money to any person, or cause I feel like, instantly, in whatever increments I wish, large or small.

Also, I can be part of, say... a fandom... and just by being a fan of some franchise, like Iron Man, can enable Marvel to spend ten years on a cinematic universe that employs hundreds of thousands of people to make movies that bring in billions of dollars, and also support a secondary economy of comic book movie reviewers online, etc.

Money moves more freely in the twenty teens than ever before... on the dollars and cents level. If my nephew, 2000 miles away, needs twenty bucks, I can give it to him immediately, in bed, in my underwear.

If my favorite YouTube channel needs twenty bucks, I can give it to them.  If Amazon allows me to buy some new socks with one click... or Pokemon Go wants to sell me a few extra pokeballs with another click... you can bet I’m clicking to buy that stuff right now!

But it’s not just pocket devices and people making impulse buys.

If that’s all it was, it would still be a much larger buffer against recession than we had in the days of old, when money didn’t move around so freely, so quickly.

No, there are also the algorithms.

Two of the most famous algorithms, the Google search algorithm, and the YouTube algorithm (YouTube is owned by Google) predate the era of the smart phone, but definitely have come into their own post smart phone.

And now we live in a world where every single app worth it’s salt has an algorithm designed to learn your preferences, help you discover more preferences you weren’t aware of before... and ultimately help you either make some kind of purchase, or at least bring your eyeballs to something that will profit from your having viewed and liked it.

And all the modern algorithms arise from theories of computer learning.  They learn how better to serve both you, and their corporate masters. And this is done kind of inside a black box, where random tweaks are made to each new generation of algorithms... without knowing what the effect of that tweak might be, and then, the tweaked algorithms are field tested, with only the top performing ones left to survive and be tweaked again.

It’s a process very similar to the breeding of animals and plants that humans did throughout the history of civilization... starting with some basic forms... getting them to fuck... keeping the good ones we like, and letting the failures die out... without any need to understand the molecular details involved on the level of the DNA.

Who knows how exactly they bred the husky?  Doesn’t matter.  They pull sleds and love snow so... they can stay!  Same with corn... how did we mutate grass into doing that?  Not sure... but we worked it for a long time, and we got there.

So, by the time Donald Trump took office in 2017, we had a fully developed smart phone economy (no coincidence he’s the first president to be a problem on Twitter) and a next gen internet teeming with AI in the form of learning algorithms... growing more effective every day... at the one job they were all conceived to do...

...keep the money flowing.

This is all to say nothing of the algorithms that must be out there for stock traders online, by the way.  

While retailers and app developers have been busy making it as easy as possible for everybody on Earth with an income and a bank account to move the tiniest amounts of money anywhere instantly... all of the investors out there, playing with the big money, have also come to rely more on their AI algorithms, than their own gut instincts.

Now... I’m not saying all of this makes the economy crash proof...

But all taken together, it makes the global economy a hell of a lot more crash resistant than it ever was before.

It’s a different kind of car now... such that if you have a crazy drunk driver like Donald Trump at the wheel... well... those pedals and that wheel are no longer direct input devices.  

He can be as violent as he wants with them, but the computer... in this case, the sum total of all economic algorithms out there, now controlling the real levers of commerce automatically... all working toward the common goal of maintaining the status quo no matter what... just ignores violent inputs that fall outside a given range.

This results in a stock market that peaks one day, and plummets the next... with the overall effect being that the spikes and dips cancel out over the week, and even the loop-the-loops, like that inverted yield curve... are just momentary thrills that amount to nothing over the week or month.

Now, if I’m wrong about this... then I’m not totally wrong.  I’m still right that more globalism and better technology has given us a more stable economy for longer than ever before.

So even if there is a crash... I’d say tech and globalism are still the way forward... maybe with some actual government regulation... depending on what exactly caused the crash?

Whatever the case... AI is the future and... within the next ten years, everybody’s gonna have a Jarvis who handles their affairs in ways that make today’s Alexa, Siri, etc... look like silly pull string talking dolls... and make us wonder how we ever survived without them.

READ: even acts as your primary council in a court of law... level of effective cyber assistant.

That is my crazy take on things tonight.

[johannesviii]

The Year of Intelligent Tigers

Some A shit ton of highlights of the last EDA I’ve read (The Year of Intelligent Tigers). Probably my longest post so far.

I took these screens while reading, along with my reactions. As usual, this is full of spoilers.

This book accomplished something unthinkable. It made me want to learn how to play music.

No. Really. That’s a big deal. See, my mother had won a synthetiser in a contest when I was like 7, didn’t care about it, and she decided I should learn the piano ; but the teacher was kind of an asshole and he kept hitting my fingers whenever I got something wrong, so I completely gave up and never tried music ever again. Like, ever. I barely know the notes’ names anymore.

Because of this book, I unearthed that synthetiser (outdated since the mid 90s) from its 18 years-old yellowish plastic sheet, and bought a method to learn how to play the piano. I’m still struggling with the names of the notes and I can barely play a simple four-notes chord without hurting my hands.

This book made me do that.

It’s about identity, cohabitation, difference, colors and music. It also has some of the best aliens in all of Doctor Who, some of the best worldbuilding ever put in the series, flashbacks to some bits of the Earth Arc which should have been in the Earth Arc, chapters ordered like an opera, great characters, top quality escapism - I can’t list everything.

I have a new favorite Eighth Doctor Adventure, and the fact that my previous one was from the same author only highlights how good this one is. 10/10

A little map! Look! It’s like the old adventure books when I was a kid!

Excuse me, what

What is this place? I like it.

Take me there, please.

Holy shit look at this description, it’s like the book blasted music in my face

You’re probably tired of reading this, but for the record, I would like to solemnly thank in person every single writer who shows the more alien side of the Doctor in these books and how his friends react to it.

A++ description

I would be completely lost on this planet since I don’t know anything about music apart from what it looks like to me. I feel you, Anji.

Here There Be Tigers

Look at these two idiots I love them

Hey, their new friend Karl has a slight speech impediment, that’s pretty rare on non-comical characters! I like that.

Hmmm cute? Not permitted? Thank you

Please enjoy this sweet little quiet moment of our favorite Team TARDIS resting under the sun in the grass and Fitz playing the guitar

This planet was made for him, hahaha

I keep saying that team deserves some vacations, so this book is exactly what I wanted, so far. Of course there’s gonna be a disruptive element any moment now, but let them enjoy this planet while they still can.

The more we know about this planet, the more I’m internally yelling PLEASE TAKE ME TO THIS PLANET

“who was full of interest”

Are you two living together & should Fitz be jealous

A wild trope appeared!

SORRY WHAT

IS KARL SADEGHI A SYNESTHETE TOO? OH MY GOD?!

[DOCTOR NYARLATHOTEP INTENSIFIES]

I laughed like an idiot, well played.

Interesting.

“The quest for vodka”

Ok now I want to draw Eight playing the violin

Stop being cute this instant

Also this tweet comes to mind:

Eight. No. Bad. What are you doing. Don’t steal the show.

What ended your last relationship: violin

HOLY SHIT DOCTOR

And now he’s sulking in his room haha, wow.

This whole situation is hilarious, adorable and sad, simultaneously.

There’s something a bit uncanny about these talking tigers, true, but the "Hullow" thing is way too cute to be creepy.

I’m laughing like an idiot too, thank you, book

Oh nooo he’s trying to talk to him through music

What.

SCREAMING

Wait what the f█ck why is there a flashback to 1935?

OH SHIT OH DAMN IT’S A FLASHBACK TO THE EARTH ARC AND TO THE EXACT PART I WANTED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT SINCE THE PREVIOUS BOOK??

Oooooh so that’s why he’s so passionate about music and violin in particular, it’s one of the first things he managed to remember besides his TARDIS!

Also, I can't believe I'm saying this considering how allergic I am to anything related to music theory, but – I kinda want to learn how to play music now. I'm serious. What is this book doing to me.

"Scared to stop in case he can’t ever start again"

That damn flashback nearly made me cry, but it’s over now. Crisis averted.

Geoffrey you’re a very nice tiger but you’re not making much sense

THE TIGERS WANT TO LEARN HOW TO PLAY MUSIC OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS?!

OH NO I LOVE BIG

Doctor what the hell are you wearing

An opera of tigers sounds like a marvelous thing.

And the negociations failed. Obviously. Technically, the humans are the invaders here, not the tigers.

Fitz’s natural response to this situation is "I’m gonna build an anti-tiger armor". Bless him.

"DO I LOOK TIGERPROOF"

YES GOOD 10/10

The anti-tiger armor saga continues.

Ouch. Ouch, ouch ouch.

And this was the end of the anti-tiger armor saga. Long live the anti-tiger armor.

Doctor where the hell are you going, come back here this instant you major alien diva

I love how the "tigers" are only looking superficially like tigers but are something completely different inside, closer to lizards. And they have two opposable thumbs on each paw too. This is so cool.

Is… is Eight going to sulk among the tigers?

I love this so much.

Bounce is so curious and I love her okay

Eight you idiot please try to concentrate

Well I love this too & now I have to draw it too. Damn you, book.

I don’t even know what to say anymore. I love this book. I love this.

Dramatic haircut!

“Neat and soft as clean fur”, oh nooo that’s cute

I… I just realised.

The Tigers look like tigers but aren’t tigers. The Doctor looks human but isn’t human.

I feel like an idiot for not noticing the parallel sooner.

I’m picturing a Tiger sipping coffee and that’s a wonderful mental picture.

Stop it Fitz

OH NOOOOO CUTE

Eight sounds like he’s doing that thing my cat does when he doesn’t want to be picked up and moved somewhere else.

And to think I was admiring how alien Eight was in the previous book.

Talking seems to work better with Tigers than humans in this case anyway.

I love this damn planet and everything on it including the plants.

I also love Chew You the old yellow tiger.

It’s also really strange and I hope we’ll get an explanation for that.

Guys this is cute and I like you both very much, but you do realise there’s simpler roads to reconciliation than "being kidnapped by tigers who want to play the violin and meeting again in the middle of nowhere and play some dramatic music", right?

My list of things I need to draw is getting longer by the minute.

I just like that tiny detail of worldbuilding okay

YES GOOD I WANT TO KNOW TOO

This shouldn’t make me so sad, but it does.

Okay then.Chapters New Who

This planet is still very intriguing and I hope we’ll get some answers.

I’m going to be very disappointed if this is true.

Interesting.

Probably, and I’d love to hear them.

The amount of scenes I want to draw in this book is getting alarmingly important

I WANT TO KNOW

We desesperately need the Tigers’ point of view of this part of the story. What happened. Why.

Woah.

I’m torn between wanting to hug Anji and wanting to laugh at Eight’s look.

Not okay.

Also my mp3 player decided to play Palladio, so I’m gonna make an improvised playlist and I will listen to it for the rest of this book.

Sadness intensifies

I’ve said it already but I love this book’s worldbuilding.

Another entry on our "Fitz CAN have good ideas sometimes" list!

No no go on, it really was a good idea.

Even if we already know for a fact that Fitz can’t sustain this level of awesomeness for more than half an hour, I’m still happy for him.

It’s a song he wrote for Sam oh nooooo

Can I hug Fitz

Look at him he’s so happy

Of course something happened right in the middle of his moment of glory. Of course it did.

Wait, what the f█ck

No Anji asdfghjk stop we still don’t know what that place does

Ohhhh that’s so cool!

I have way too many feelings about Eight trying to be a Tiger okay

So… the Tigers used to be more intelligent? Then something happened, and they built this place to keep their culture safe? I love this oh my god

You don’t realise how long it took to make this liveblog readable because of the sheer amount of reactions boiling down to "I love this" or rows of exclamation marks.

It’s an ark. It’s a damn ark, containing all the culture of their ancestors. Why. What happened. Why am I getting so emotional about talking tigers that lay eggs. WHY.

Okay, that’s it

Breaking news: Year of Intelligent Tigers is officially the third EDA which actually made me cry. And it did it with TALKING TIGERS.

CENTURIES

AN ANCIENT CIVILISATION OF ALIEN TIGERS

Still crying by the way

Once again I’m struggling to not post row after row of exclamation points

Yes yes good I want to see the other rooms

OOOHH. So HE’S responsible for the sudden appearance of the nodes all over the city!

Well, now I’m sad again.

HOLY SHIT

Have I told you how well this book is constructed yet? There’s parts where you follow the whole cast, then individual "solo" chapters, then the whole cast again. There’s references to music even in the construction of the chapters. It’s wonderful.

No Karl no what are you doing

Not really, no

He’s just trying to help, Longbody, don’t be so suspicious.

I have a bad feeling about this.

Port Any was built on top of the ancient Tigers city!

There’s something in my eyes again, dammit

Another line of exclamation points I’m trying to suppress.

If it’s right in the middle of the city, that’s going to be a problem.

COULD YOU ALL STOP BEING SO ADORABLE

EXCUSE ME THIS IS STILL WAY TOO CUTE PLEASE TONE IT DOWN

The Tigers already have a form of music of their own. Every time I think this book can’t get better, it finds a way to do so.

Oh my f█cking god

In a book full of wonderful scenes, I think this one might be my favorite so far. Karl and Eight trying to explain Beethoven to the Tigers. I’m so happy.

Also "sorry, I was watching a bug".

Oh shit oh f█ck oh damn, thank god Longbody was listening

The Tigers are surprisingly reasonable considering what the humans are planning to do.

I still hope this story will end well, though.

Please no

"They were all surrounding a problem, ready to pounce on it and kill it"

Next on my improvised playlist is Beyond the Stars by Cristian Onofreiciuc and I'm overdosing a little bit on beautiful imagery at this point, my head is full of colors

"There were no other Tigers"

I'm so sad and also so happy, this book is doing weird things to my head.

So he still wants to save everyone, not just the Tigers. Of course he does.

GOOD

GOOD²

The bomb got struck by lightning. What. How. What the hell did he do.

I have to admit it's really strange.

Despite all the music and the cultural differences and the environmental message and the anti-colonialist message, the main theme of this book seems to be identity, and I'm always a sucker for that.

Are you telling me we could have had a book in that setting instead of Endgame??

Well I'm sad again now.

Uh. So after remembering how to play the violin, he remembered one particular tune.

Imagine having a song stuck in your head for decades and not being able to recognise it. That's both funny and horrific.

CUTENESS OVERLOAD

Oh nooo they forgot he was more fragile than a Tiger and he's hurt

THIS BOOK NEEDS TO STOP MAKING ME CRY

Also, in its own weird metaphorical way, this book hits way too close to home

Fitz trying to look casual after the whole "the Doctor tried to be a Tiger" thing

Just so you know, the song currently playing in my improvised playlist for this book is The March by Lights and Motion, and this playlist was a terrible idea because it makes everything more intense and the book is already intense enough on its own.

Another thing on my endless list of things I should draw

Would somebody please stop Quick before he does something incredibly stupid again

Thank you Doctor.

Also I'm getting strong Twelve vibes from this bit.

I laughed so hard

Why is every silly little detail in this book making me so sad and so happy at the same time

Not everything has to be about you and your concerto, Karl

Fitz, stop making me laugh, this is supposed to be a tense scene.

KARL WHAT THE F█CK WHY DID YOU DO THAT

ASFGHJJKLMKGJ F█CK YOU KARL WHY

WAIT THAT'S BOUNCE

NO NOT BOUNCE

F█CK NOW I'M CRYING AGAIN TOO

ARE YOU HAPPY NOW BOOK ARE YOU F█CKING HAPPY

So they rediscover their civilisation every two centuries, and then they lose it again, that's some sort of perpetual tragedy and I'm still not okay.

THEY WERE ALWAYS ABLE TO UNDERSTAND THE TIGERS THANKS TO THE TARDIS BUT THEIR BRAINS DIDN'T ASSUME THE TIGERS HAD A LANGUAGE SO IT DIDN'T WORK AT FIRST, THIS IS SO COOL

YOU'VE DONE ENOUGH DAMAGE ALREADY, KARL, STAY WHERE YOU ARE

Fitz, that pun was atrocious

Also RIP Longbody

Okay we're nearly at the end, I need some kind of epic music for this, something very over the top and ridiculous

As it turns out, Creation of Earth by Thomas Bergersen was an excELLENT CHOICE -HOLY SHIT DOCTOR WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO THE WEATHER, I mean yeah this is epic but I'm also concerned okay

DON'T ADD EVEN MORE COLOR TO THIS SCENE THERE'S ALREADY A TON OF IT AND BETWEEN THIS AND THE MUSIC I'M KINDA OVERDOSING

THANK YOU THAT WAS AMAZING

WAIT IT'S NOT OVER

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED

YOU DO, HOLY SHIT

Oh my god I just remembered something.

That's exactly what I.M.Foreman told him in Interference. With the riddle involving a baby goose you have to free from a bottle without breaking the bottle yourself. You feed the bird until it's strong enough to break it itself. That's exactly what he's trying to do here. He can't remember that conversation since it happened long before the Earth Arc, but I believe it had an impact on him anyway.

I love that ending. Simple but absolutely wonderful.

This book needs to stop making me sad at unexpected moments.

I wish I could have seen that too.

TIGER MUSIC OH NOOO

...Wait

If this turns out to be the song that was stuck in Eight's head I'm gonna die

LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE, FITZ KREINER

This book was a rollercoaster of emotions until the very end, wasn't it

...and it deserves a standing ovation.

Damn.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Shit I Hate #2: Aspects of the DCEU (And the Psychopathic Portion of Its Fandom)

So, I’m sure a lot of you think I outright hate the DCEU. I haven’t been shy from giving harsh criticisms of it in the past, though the whole hardcore anti-DCEU thing from a while back was only to get rid of a particularly annoying mutual (and she and people like her will be brought up later in this post, don’t worry). So now, here, I will give my honest-to-god opinions on the DCEU, and talk about what it is I hate about it. Because I certainly don’t hate everything about it; there’s plenty of value to be  found in it. But it has some glaring flaws I want to address.

So, as I said, I don’t hate the DCEU. In fact, I really, really want it to succeed. Anyone with a brain wants it to get better; if there’s only one company making good superhero movies, well, people are gonna get fatigued. Good competition is better for business than steamrolling the competition. But sadly, the DCEU has been, from an objective standpoint, incredibly disappointing.

It’s totally okay to like and enjoy these movies; like I said, there is plenty to enjoy and admire. But from an objective standpoint, I can’t say any of these films are very good as superhero movies. Let me go into what I mean: the superhero movie genre is obviously not set in stone, and it can encompass a lot of things: it can be dark and gritty, lighthearted and comic, a mixture of the two… But DC has tended to veer towards dark and gritty when it comes to adaptations, especially when it comes to Batman. Out of the seven Batman films from the 80s to today, five of them have been darker and grittier than your standard comic book fare (Tum Burton’s and Nolan’s Batman films to be precise). The other two are much-maligned for their campy tone and silliness. Now, Nolan’s films, while being dark and gritty, are very well regarded for the most part, particularly the middle entry of the franchise, The Dark Knight. This film is one of my all-time favorite films, and is probably the film that has held DC back the most as they try and start up their shared cinematic universe.

The reason Nolan’s Batman films work despite their dark and gritty nature is because they are much more grounded in reality than your standard superhero fare as well as featuring a hero that tends to deal with darker fare in general. DC, in their rush to join the cinematic universe bandwagon Marvel kickstarted, decided that Nolan’s successful Batman films would be the best films to emulate when going for their reboots; the problem is, their first film in the DCEU was a Superman film, and Zach Snyder was directing.

Zach Snyder is not a bad director; in fact, he has directed some truly amazing comic book adaptations (Watchmen and 300). The thing is, though, that Snyder was always best at faithfully translating someone else’s work to live action. He managed to deliver a faithful adaptation of Alan Moore’s infamously unfilmable graphic novel hat honestly improves on it in some areas, and the same goes for his adaptation of Frank Miller’s tale of the 300 Spartans. Original material is not his strong suit; look at Sucker Punch, one of the most awful, brainless action films ever shat out, and the point where you can see his career starting to spiral into Shymalanian failure. Man of Steel is not an adaptation of any one Superman story, and the questionable elements of it are not easy to ignore with Snyder’s style. The incredible destruction during the final battle, the weak characterization of Zod, the more violent Superman, Superman killing Zod, it’s not as easy tos wallow with the pretentious pseudo-Nolan style Snyder is going for. While he’s great at adapting other people’s work, Snyder is not good at emulating other director’s styles, and it really makes the film one hard to recommend. It’s a dark, gritty, and dour Superman movie, and Superman is not a hero people wanted to see get dark and brooding. Still, Man of Steel is not a film I’d say is objectively good or bad; it’s a very mixed movie, and I’d say it’s on the fence. At the very least, as the first movie in a franchise, it had great room to improve with a sequel. A sequel would address the flaws, fix plotholes, just work everything into something more enjoyable. I mean, all the actors did a good job with what they were given, and Cavill is easily my favorite live action Superman, so a sequel would easily improve on this, right?

That’s sadly not what we got. Not entirely anyway.

I once said the DCEU was like if Marvel had released their films like this: Iron Man → The Avengers → Guardians of the Galaxy → Avengers: Age of Ultron → Thor. Some asshat responded with some smug, sarcastic condescension saying “Oh why not have an origin story for every character in Lord of the Rings before Lord of the Rings actually came out? :)” This analogy is incredibly stupid, as Tolkien likely would have LOVED that, and superhero movies REQUIRE character setup. Do you know why The Avengers was as enjoyable as it was? Because all of these characters had already been set up in other films, so the movie didn’t need to feed us all these backstories for all these characters, just giving “need to know” characterization for any newcomers. A big crossover like this only can work if there’s proper setup; if Freddy vs. Jason happened after the first Friday the 13th and before a single Nightmare on Elm Street movie it probably wouldn’t be a very good film. It had plenty of films to build up what a threat Freddy and Jason were. Batman v Superman does not do that. It is the followup to Man of Steel, and it expects us to just go with two brand new, never-before-seen characters, one who has little to no backstory given and one whose backstory and characterization takes up a good chunk of the first third of the film. There really should have been a new Batman film, a Superman sequel, and Wonder Woman’s movie prior to this. They didn’t have to be origin stories, a brief origin like Batman’s at the start of Batman v Superman would have been fine, but audiences needed SOMETHING so we wouldn’t just be thrown in and forced to accept shit. The lack of buildup even seeps into the cameos; we are thrown the Flash, Aquaman, and Cyborg origins one after the other in a three minute span of time. It’s like they’re trying to cram as many origins in at once instead of bothering to take time establishing these characters. Imagine if in the comics there was one panel of Batman’s parents getting show, and then Batman is just an accepted part of the universe from there on out. What the filmmakers don’t seem to get is, even though most of us know the general story, not everyone is a comic fan with years of experience in background and lore. The reason buildup is needed is for newcomers, people unfamiliar with the characters. Just throwing characters in alienates people.

Of course, this is the least of that film’s problems. The tone and even the scenes are extremely dark and bleak until the very end. There’s very little levity, unless you can bring yourself to laugh at Eisenberg’s cringeworthy performance. Now, obviously, I’m not saying there needs to be tons and tons of jokes; The Dark Knight had rather sparse humor, and movies like the Iron Man sequels, Thor: The Dark World, and a good chunk of Age of Ultron are very weak due to the oversaturation of comedic elements. But having this level of darkness and crushing gloom and moodiness can wear on audiences; it can be hard for people to give a shit about a story and characters in a miserable setting. And this is a common criticism; aside from Wonder Woman, people have found it hard to care about the heroes in this film. Their characterization can come across as unlikable, bitter, and mean. While this works for Batman, for Superman this is even more alien than he is.

And again, it’s not like this movie has nothing going for it; the fight scenes are all fantastic, Bruce’s origin is well done, seeing the Big Three together is cool and all the actors save Eisenberg do well… but it’s not enough. This movie is, quite frankly, a hot mess, a film that apes the Nolan style with no idea what made it work, much as all the awful Shrek clones that came out in the 2000s that tried to be Shrek without understanding why it was such a good film in the first place. It’s just dark, bleak, and edgy because that’s what they think audiences want! And that is most definitely not the case, to a certain extent.

Audiences DO like having more mature superhero stories; The Dark Knight and The Winter Soldier certainly prove that, what with their more serious tones. But, especially in the sort of culture we have these days, people don’t want to see darkness and bleakness in their superhero films anymore. Superheros are supposed to be escapism and excitement, something enjoyable to see when you want to escape the darkness of the world. In an America that has experienced years of riots, protests, and terrible news, is it any surprise that audiences are rejecting DC’s dark and brooding hero stories for Marvel’s more lighthearted-with-serious-elements movies?

This brings me to the biggest thing I hate: the insane, miserable anti-MCU pro-DCEU apologists. Now, like I said, there’s nothing wrong with being a fan of these movies. Hell, despite my criticisms, I have a great deal of admiration for elements of the franchise, and I enjoyed Suicide Squad a great deal. But the levels some people go to is disgusting and disturbing.

The perfect example is a mutual I used to have. She was really nice and cool for a while, and liked both Marvel and DC. Then Age of Ultron came out. After that, her intelligence went downhill, and she became a rabid hater of the MCU. She would constantly post about how she hated it, while praising the DCEU. She’d reblog tons of posts with asinine criticisms of the MCU and had a sort of smug sense of superiority about her love of the DC films. It came to the point she was outright bashing MCU fans and calling anyone who defended the films, including me, a ‘stan,’ while ignoring and deflecting any criticisms of DC’s movies. She was one of the people who believed Marvel was paying off critics, even pointing to the great reviews Doctor Strange got as evidence (she was convinced the movie was some evil racist mess that whitewashed for the sake of profit, which is so far from the truth it’s laughable). This is ignoring the fact that paying critics off like that would be incredibly counterproductive and would be a waste of money, but at this point critical thinking was not her forte.

And this wasn’t unique to her; the incredibly rabid fans are ALL like that. They all believe the lies about Disney and Marvel bribing critics, they all hop up and down and accuse the MCU of racism, they all screech about how bad Marvel is and how they cram jokes into everything (even though there are only about five movies where this is a big problem). They are all the some kind of person who is smug and condescending and acts like they’re mentally superior for enjoying certain types of people fighting in colorful underwear. They are in the same league of stupid shittiness as anti-bronies and anti-Frozen, and they may honestly be less intelligent than either of those groups. Now, obviously, there are plenty of normal, reasonable people who enjoy or even prefer the DCEU to the MCU. This isn’t something that affects the entire fandom, it’s just the kind of people I’ve had to experience in large numbers.

So, let’s sum up what exactly I hate about the DCEU:

1. Snyder’s piss-poor direction and influence

2. The decision to constantly ape Nolan’s style, despite the fact they don’t seem to get why people liked films like The Dark Knight

3. Rushing in to a cinematic universe with no buildup

4. Questionable casting choices, such as Eisenberg as Luthor and Amber Heard

5. The lack of levity in their first two movies to help offset the crushing darkness

6. The constant pushing of extended cuts better than the theatrical release; they need to just release the full cuts to theaters and stop fucking with director’s visions

7. Speaking of which, the disastrous mangling of Suicide Squad

8. The rabid uber-fans who have a superiority complex and are just childish shitheads

That about sums up the shit I hate about the DCEU. I don’t hate the actual DCEU itself, though I have to admit it’s hard to enjoy aside from Suicide Squad so far (would it have killed them to keep more Leto in and not have the fucking trailer company submit a cut they mashed with the director’s?). What I hate is a lot of artistic choices they’ve put into it, the direction it has gone, and how fucking awful some of the fans can get. I’m hyped as hell for Wonder Woman and cautiously optimistic about Justice League, and I cannot wait to see Affleck’s Batman film and Dwayne Johnson as Black Adam. I just really want the filmmakers to take the criticisms of their works to heart and help make the DCEU a worthy rival for the MCU instead of looking like a cheap bandwagoner like it does now.

We can only hope.

[made-from-galaxies]

Here’s Why Black Widow Didn’t Get a Memorial at the End of ‘Avengers: Endgame’

(Major spoilers ahead for “Avengers: Endgame” and the whole situation with Black Widow aka Natasha Romanoff, but you probably already knew that given the headline)

The scenes in “Avengers: Endgame” that take place after the film’s climax are all about Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) and Steve Rogers (Chris Evans), first with the big funeral for Iron Man after he died to defeat Thanos and his army, and then with Captain America’s big retirement scene to close the whole thing out. They were the two main characters of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, so fine, whatever. But it still irks me that Natasha Romanoff (Scarlett Johansson) got only the barest of mentions after she sacrificed herself in the second act.

If she hadn’t killed herself on Vormir so that Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) could return to the present with the Soul Stone, then they wouldn’t have been able to save all those people Thanos snapped, and then Tony Stark’s snap to wipe out all of Thanos’s forces wouldn’t have been possible. Her sacrifice mattered just as much as Tony’s did.

Also Read: ‘Avengers: Endgame’ – That Last Scene Makes No Sense

But when we get to the end of the movie, we get a big memorial for Iron Man with a huge number of famous heroes showing up to pay their respects, while Hawkeye and Scarlet Witch (Elizabeth Olsen) hang out in the corner having their own private mourning ceremony for Natasha and Vision, who apparently nobody other than them — and Bruce Banner (Mark Ruffalo), I guess — cared about.

It would have been a great moment to elevate a character who always operated from the shadows, never getting the acclaim that Tony always received. The one time Black Widow stepped into the spotlight was at the end of “Captain America: The Winter Soldier,” when a US Senate committee threatened to put her on trial. The people of the MCU finally had a chance to give Natasha the respect she was due, and they just didn’t.

On the commentary track on the home video release of “Avengers: Endgame,” co-director Joe Russo addressed this concern, and blamed next year’s “Black Widow” movie for the lack of a memorial for Natasha.

Also Read: ‘Avengers: Endgame’ – Who Is That Random Kid At the End of the Movie?

“People have asked why Natasha didn’t get the same amount of screen time post-death as Tony did,” Joe Russo said. “Well, Tony does not have another movie. Tony is done. And Natasha has another film. And Marvel Universe obviously does not have to move forward linearly anymore. But that character still has more screen time coming.”

So there’s your answer — Natasha Romanoff didn’t get a big memorial in “Endgame” because of the prequel movie coming out next May, whereas Tony Stark is not gonna be in the MCU again for the foreseeable future. Though they didn’t mention Vision specifically, there’s probably a similar reason for the lack of love for him after he died in “Infinity War,” since he’ll be back somehow in the “WandaVision” Disney+ show in 2021.

There is an interesting sentence in that answer, though, that caused a big exclamation point to pop up over my head, though: “And Marvel Universe obviously does not have to move forward linearly anymore.” Since the MCU has done multiple prequel movies that didn’t involve time travel, including the first “Captain America” movie that was the fourth film overall in this franchise, it seems incorrect to say that the MCU ever “had to” move forward linearly.

Also Read: ‘Avengers: Endgame’ – What Happened With Loki and the Tesseract?

To me, this implies that the “Black Widow” movie will be more than just another prequel like “Captain America: The First Avenger” or “Captain Marvel,” which took us to the past to set up heroes that would have an impact on the present. To me, the implication is something I have long suspected about “Black Widow”: that it will involve characters from the MCU’s post-“Endgame” present somehow.

But Marvel still has yet to confirm anything along those lines about that film. When they presented footage from the film at Comic-Con a couple weeks ago there was no indication that it would be anything other than a straight prequel — one that likely will set up a new player for future movies, like probably Florence Pugh’s Yelena.

We’ve got a while to wait before we find anything out about what the “Black Widow” movie really has in store for us. It’s nine months until the movie comes out, and it’ll probably be December at the earliest before we get a proper trailer. So sit tight.

All 58 Marvel Movies Ranked, Including ‘Spider-Man: Far From Home’

It’s hard to believe — and sad, too, if you like these movies — that “Spider-Man: Far From Home” is the last Marvel movie of the year. There’s no more on the calendar until Fox’s “The New Mutants” early next year, and given how many times that one has been delayed it may not be safe to assume it actually will be the next Marvel movie.

Anyway, the point is just we’re about to get into an extended hiatus. No more MCU movies, no non-MCU Marvel movies the rest of 2019. We’re getting a bit of a break from comic book movies, with only DC’s “Joker” origin movie left.

58. “Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer”

Just a nightmare. A total nightmare. There have been a number of bad superhero movies, but from the talking gas cloud the filmmakers cast as Galactus to Jessica Alba‘s dye job, this one transcends bad.

57. “X-Men Origins: Wolverine”

A totally chaotic stir fry of nonsense that tells the story of how Wolverine got his claws. Features an early version of Deadpool (also played by Ryan Reynolds) whose mouth is stapled shut, which should tell you all you need to know about it.

56. “Elektra”

That five minutes when they tried to turn Jennifer Garner into an action star went about as well as it should have.

55. “X-Men: The Last Stand”

Just a total mess, incoherent from the word “go.” After losing director of the first two X-Men films Brian Singer to the first Superman reboot attempt, replacement Matthew Vaughn gave way to eventual director Brett Ratner, who might have killed off the superhero genre entirely were “Spider-Man” not blowing up the box office.

54. “Fantastic Four” (2015)

There could maybe have been a good movie in here somewhere — the cast (Michael B Jordan, Miles Teller, Kate Mara) certainly warranted one. But this Frankenstein of a film is a behind-the-scenes horror story, and you can see it in the totally disjointed final product.

53. “Daredevil”

This was basically “Early-2000s: The Movie,” with Ben Affleck, Jennifer Garner, Colin Farrell and Michael Clark Duncan as the main players. The cherry on top of this turd sundae was that damn Evanescence song.

52. “Fantastic Four” (2005)

Tim Story‘s first “Fantastic Four” is just sort of there, challenging you to remember it exists. With Chris Evans, who played the Human Torch here, going on to embody Captain America in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, that gets tougher every year.

51. “The Punisher” (2004)

This is the Punisher as a straight revenge thriller, and it’s not bad. Thomas Jane performs admirably, but the whole thing is missing that extra something that would have elevated it beyond standard genre fare. Setting it in Tampa didn’t help.

50. “Spider-Man 3”

Maybe the bad outweighs the good here, but Emo Peter Parker’s dance number remains one of the greatest single moments in any comic book movie, sorry, haters.

49. “Howard the Duck”

A notorious flop at the box office and, yeah, it’s not exactly “good.” But now, 30 years removed from its premiere, “Howard the Duck” is pretty fun as a relic of the ’80s.

48. “The Punisher” (1989)

Dolph Lundgren and Louis Gossett Jr. star in a low-rent ’80s grunge C-level classic. This one’s all novelty value.

47. “Ghost Rider”

For a movie starring Nic Cage about a dude who rides a Harley and turns into a flaming skeleton, this is a surprisingly mundane movie.

46. “The Amazing Spider-Man”

We may never figure out what went wrong with Marc Webb‘s Spider-Man duology, but his choice of Andrew Garfield to play Peter Parker is still brilliant. It just sucks that this movie doesn’t really make any sense.

45. “X-Men”

The beginning of the current wave of theatrical superhero movies, “X-Men” was kind of a cheapie and it showed. Novel at the time, now it just comes off as unremarkable mid-budget action fare as Fox was merely sticking its toe in the superhero waters. Timid.

44. “The Incredible Hulk”

It’s sometimes hard to remember that this one counts as part of the MCU, since it placed Ed Norton in the Dr. Banner role since inhabited by Mark Ruffalo in the “Avengers” films. It’s also hard to remember because it’s generally not memorable.

43. “Thor”

The fantasy Marvel movie is directed by Kenneth Branagh, who covers the whole movie in canted angle shots and theatrical stylings. It’s pretty boring, also, but at least it looks cool.

42. “The Amazing Spider-Man 2”

More of the same impossible-to-follow hack-n’-slash plotting from the previous movie, offset by Andrew Garfield continuing to be awesome and Jamie Foxx going way over the top as the big bad.

41. “Thor: The Dark World”

“The Dark World,” in contrast to the first “Thor” movie, is certainly not boring. If anything, it suffers the opposite problem, going so hard and fast that it loses substance.

40. “Blade: Trinity”

Starring a pre-Deadpool Ryan Reynolds basically playing a vampire-slaying Deadpool, throwing out one-liners like his mama’s life depended on it, this may not a “good” movie, but it sure is fun.

39. “X2: X-Men United”

A big step up from the first “X-Men” both in production values and quality, it still lacks much in the way of energy. Which is inexcusable when you’ve got Alan Cumming as the teleporting mutant Nightcrawler all over your movie.

38. “Spider-Man”

Sam Raimi truly assembled the prototypical superhero movie with this first entry in the “Spider-Man” franchise, in 2002. Like “X-Men” before it, “Spider-Man” is a bit underwhelming today, but unlike “X-Men” it was proud of its nerd roots.

37. “X-Men: Apocalypse”

Could have been a bizarre ironic summer classic if it were structured like a real movie and had any character development whatsoever. Instead it’s just a shot of visual adrenaline that I’ll probably want to revisit at some point — but not when I’m sober

36. “Avengers: Age of Ultron”

“Ultron” is frustrating for what it lacks — chiefly the feeling that it’s advancing the overall story arc of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. But as with the first “Avengers” movie its weaknesses are overcome by great character work.

35. “The Avengers”

The story is a total mess, relying heavily on moviegoers’ memories of previous MCU films (if you didn’t remember or know coming in what the Tesseract was, hoo boy). But the novelty of the Marvel’s first big superhero team-up was irresistible, and director Joss Whedon balanced his ensemble expertly, giving everyone plenty to do so none of them ever fades into the background.

34. “Blade”

Pure B-movie trash, which is fine because that’s precisely what it aims for: bloody, crass, awesome. Blade, by the way, remains the only black comic book character besides Shaquille O’Neal‘s “Steel” to get his/her own movie, though Marvel’s “Black Panther” is slated for a 2018 release.

33. “Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance”

For the sequel, they tapped the “Crank” director duo known as Neveldine/Taylor. It was an inspired choice, because “Spirit of Vengeance” was exactly as nutty as you’d hope a PG-13 comic book movie would be. Shame that it was apparently stressful enough to break up the tandem of Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor.

32. “Captain America: The First Avenger”

A lot of folks like to complain that all superhero movies are the same. But this was actually a pretty good World War II movie, too.

31. “Guardians of the Galaxy”

Plot-wise, it never really adds up to anything, but the strength of the cast and the bizarre world they explore more than make up for it.

30. “Blade 2”

Beloved nerd Guillermo del Toro took over for this one and ramped everything up to 11. More vampires, more blood, more people getting sliced up — and of course baddies whose jaws can split open and swallow a person’s head whole.

29. “Big Hero 6”

Disney Animation Studios made a Marvel movie, and it’s really sweet. Sure, it’s the kiddie version of Marvel, but that doesn’t prevent it from being a wholly satisfying experience.

28. “Captain Marvel”

It’s fine, but “Captain Marvel” feels like a movie from before Marvel Studios really hit its stride in Phase 3 of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Right now it’s a movie that seems very much out of place.

27. “Guardians of the Galaxy vol. 2”

An improvement on the first film, and an absolute delight from moment to moment — but it never quite coalesces into a coherent whole because so many subplots distract from the core story and rob it of its emotional impact. Would be a top 5 comic book movie if it had just reigned in the plot.

26. “Iron Man”

It was Robert Downey Jr.‘s reemergence on the big screen, and he’s flawless in this origin story that takes Tony Stark from billionaire playboy weapons manufacturer to billionaire playboy other-things manufacturer.

25. “Avengers: Endgame”

This movie is, frustratingly, far from perfect. In fact, it’s kind of a huge mess. But it’s also awesome and thrilling and hilarious and contains some individual moments that are perfect. I wish it was better, but with everything required of a movie that exists to wrap up 21 movies’ worth of story arcs, I’m glad it’s as good as it is.

24. “Hulk”

In 2003 the modern wave of superhero movies was still in its infancy, and Ang Lee — still the best filmmaker to do a comic book movie — got experimental with “Hulk.” And what he made was an incredible melodrama with visual stylings meant to ape comic book panels. It didn’t sit well with audiences, but “Hulk” remains one of the most compelling and interesting Marvel movies to date.

23. “The Wolverine”

This was, like, just a legitimately enjoyable melodramatic action movie. Sure, it turns into a video game boss battle by the end, but for most of its running time it’s just an actual movie. 

22. “Punisher: War Zone”

Whereas the previous “Punisher” movie was melodramatic and contemplative, this one is just murderous. And it’s awesome.

21. “Venom” 

How can anybody resist the pull of Tom Hardy doing comedy? This movie knows exactly what it’s trying to be, and what it’s trying to be is dumb and fun and nothing else. And it is extremely fun.

20. “X-Men: Days of Future Past”

Its time travel logic is a bit iffy, but “Days of Future Past” is still tremendously entertaining because, while epic, it’s not overly serious. As “Back to the Future” taught us long ago, you can get away with a lot of logical leaps if you strike the right tone.

18. “Deadpool”

In the angsty and angry times we live in, “Deadpool” is perfect. Aggressively violent and flippantly meanspirited, it’s the exact emotional release we needed.

17. “X-Men: Dark Phoenix”

The main series “X-Men” movies have never achieved any sort of greatness, but at least “Dark Phoenix” ends the whole thing with one of the best efforts of the bunch. And that sequence on the train in the third act is easily the best action sequence of these movies.

16. “Spider-Man: Far From Home” 

It’s frustrating that it doesn’t really deal with the immense fallout from “Avengers: Endgame,” but it’s still as visually creative as any movie in the MCU, and Jake Gyllenhaal’s Mysterio is an all-timer of a villain. Dude goes all the way out in this.

15. “X-Men: First Class”

The first “X-Men” movie that could be described as “fun.” It’s basically two movies crammed into one, story-wise, but director Matthew Vaughn‘s touch is so breezy and enjoyable that it totally works anyway, thanks in large part to a brilliant cast that includes Michael Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence and James McAvoy.

14. “Spider-Man: Homecoming” 

Not quite the best “Spider-Man” movie, but still an absolute delight, with a cast full of scene stealers. Michael Keaton as the Vulture makes for one of the best Marvel villains ever.

13. “Deadpool 2” 

While you may get whiplash from the “Deadpool” sequel’s occasional very serious and emo scenes, the rest of the movie is thoroughly delightful, somehow managing to be even funnier — and more hilariously violent — than the original.

12. “Ant-Man”

“Ant-Man” represented a first for the MCU by being a straight-up comedy. And it’s a very good one, with a cast that’s perfectly suited for it. Aside from Paul Rudd who plays Ant-Man himself, Michael Pena is the true standout as Scott Lang’s best friend and former cellmate.

11. “Ant-Man and the Wasp” 

It’s ever so slightly frustrating that this one doesn’t fully integrate into the “Infinity War” situation, but even so it’s thoroughly a delight. Evangeline Lilly is so good at the Wasp that I’m retroactively irritated that she didn’t don the suit in the previous “Ant-Man” movie.

10. “Doctor Strange”

If it weren’t hamstrung with all the requisite elements of an origin story, “Doctor Strange” might have been the best Marvel movie ever. That’s the power of the astonishing visual imagination on display here. People love to talk about the nebulous concept of capturing some long lost childlike sense of wonder though the magic of cinema — “Doctor Strange” is one of the only movies I’ve watched as an adult that really accomplishes that.

9. “Spider-Man 2”

This is a movie that fully understands its main character and taps into what made him such a captivating figure for so long. Yeah, Peter Parker’s a superhero, but he’s also a college kid working a minimum wage job to make rent while also taking university physics classes. Peter buckles under the pressure, something we can all relate to.

8. “Iron Man 3”

As far as I’m concerned this is the “Iron Man” movie. Somehow, Shane Black was able to infiltrate the MCU and make a legitimate Shane Black movie with all the wit and raw humanity you’d expect from him. It carries exactly the sort of authorial identity we should want all these movies to have.

7. “Thor: Ragnarok”

A thorough delight. This might be the most fun we had at the movies in all of 2017, and so we can’t help but love it.

6. “Captain America: Civil War”

Multiply the two previous best Marvel movies by one another and you get “Civil War.” It packs the sort of emotional payoff all the disconnected Marvel movies can’t really provide. And as an action film it’s easily the best of the superhero genre.

5. “Avengers: Infinity War” 

You could certainly make the argument that “Infinity War” does not really hold up on as a complete movie on its own, because it kinda begins with the second act. But I don’t care. The culmination of this ten-year shared universe experiment should stand on the shoulders of the movies that came before it. The fact that it packs such a profound emotional punch, however, is what really makes it work.

4. “Black Panther” 

It’s held back a little by being saddled with standard “origin movie” issues — introducing audiences to the world of Wakanda isn’t a quick and easy task, and it could use an extra 15-20 minutes to flesh out the supporting characters — but still manages to be the most substantial superhero movie ever. It’s kind of amazing that Disney let writer/director Ryan Coogler make this overt a political statement — it’s the most openly political mega-budget movie I’ve ever seen . Also, while I’m listing superlatives: Michael B Jordan delivers the best performance ever in a superhero movie. Good lord.

3. “Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse” 

The best superhero movies, and movies in general, are the ones that are truly most human. And “Spider-Verse,” despite being animated, despite the wacky cast of Spider-People, despite the outlandish premise, is as real as movies get.

2. “Logan”

James Mangold’s small-scale western is a game changer for the entire superhero genre, daring to defy pretty much standard by which you expect these movies to operate. It’s just a great movie by any normal standard. Where “Civil War” elevated the genre, “Logan” opts instead to be something else entirely and we’re all the better for it.

1. “Captain America: The Winter Soldier”

The Russo brothers, who made their entrance to the MCU directing “Winter Soldier” before taking the reigns on “Civil War” and, eventually, 2018’s “Avengers: Infinity War,” really impressed with “Winter Soldier.” It’s a classic spy thriller with a superhero twist. And Robert Redford as the bad guy is a really nice touch.

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Decades of big screen Marvel adaptations demand a long, ranked list. This is that list

Source: https://opengeekhouse.com.br/2019/08/10/heres-why-black-widow-didnt-get-a-memorial-at-the-end-of-avengers-endgame/