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raeynbowboi · 4 years ago

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How to Play as Link in DnD 5e (2.0)

With the release of both Mythic Odysseys of Theros and now the new big expansion in Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything, I figured now would be a good time to reexamine Link with the context of new subclasses, class features, and game mechanics that weren’t around the last time that I built him. While I won’t do this for every character I’ve built before, characters who have new options made available with these updates will get a new rebuild for 2021. If you want to compare and contrast this build to the original, I will link that build right [here].

The Spirit of the Hero

Link’s a Hylian and that’s just a fancy way of saying elf. His best racial options are either the High Elf, the Wood Elf, or the Half-Elf. Half-elf’s extra skills are tempting, but as Link is never given any parents or an ancestral family tree, we can’t really justify him as a half-elf. We’ll call him a Wood Elf for the extra +2 to his Dexterity and the +1 to his Wisdom as well as that woodsy vibe. But if you wanna go for a Half-Elf for the power build, I won’t tell anyone.

Link’s alignment is tricky. On the one hand, he is shown kneeling before the monarchy, defeating the forces of evil and darkness, and doing odd jobs to help the common people he comes across. However, he can also start forest fires, break into people’s houses, smash pots, steal people’s life savings or personal belongings, and attack the chicken population until they attack back. I’d wager he’s Neutral Good if for no other reason than his morality is highly dependent on the player.

My first choice for Link’s background would be the Folk Hero for Animal Handling and Survival. However, Link’s background is so inconsistent, it’s easier to just list out the skills he tends to have and tell you to pick a background that has those skills, or create your own: Animal Handling, Athletics, Investigation, Nature, Perception, or Survival. There’s a case to be made for other skills as well. Acrobatics works a little and his jumps did involve sick flips in Majora’s Mask, but Link doesn’t tend to balance or platform jump very often. Link can play instruments fine and danced in the Subrosian Dance Hall in Oracle of Seasons for Performance proficiency, but he’s usually playing instruments to activate effects, not to actually perform for a crowd. Link shows some Stealth skills in Breath of the Wild, but this hasn’t been a longstanding skill of his, so I didn’t lump it in with his main skill list.

Becoming a Hero

When it comes to his build, Link has made some use of spells in the past, but he’s nowhere near the spellcaster that Zelda and Ganondorf are. Link is definitely more of a martial fighter who augments himself with a wide arsenal of magical items. So when it comes to picking Link’s class, we have a few things to keep in mind.

BARD

Link is a talented young man, and he has had magical instruments in a few games over the years, as well as dancing in Subrosia, among other things. While I don’t subscribe to the idea of Link being a bard myself, I understand why people would come to this conclusion, as Link isn’t really bad at anything... except talking. And lying. And looking threatening. Or haggling. Yeah kind of hard to depict Link as a CHA caster who isn’t proficient in any CHA skill checks.

Spirits (UA) This doesn’t fit for every Link, but especially for Breath of the Wild where Link gets help from the spirits of his fallen comrades, the flavor of calling on the dead works for Link. For a non-BotW example, maybe Link can tell stories of his past lives, and the memories he shares with each of them.

Valor This college has the downside of being built as a cheerleader, while Link really should be built for solo-combat since that’s how he approaches most fights. But Valor is better than Swords and also gives Link proficiency with martial weapons and shields, while Swords does not.

FIGHTER

While there are many martial classes, the Fighter differentiates itself by being the most down-to-earth option. It’s not beholden to rage, or smites, hunting, or sneaking. It is the simple skill of the blade, and this is a skill Link has in spades. From the earliest games, Link has been a master of the sword, the shield, and the bow.

Battle Master Link is a strategic fighter. He looks for weak spots, and he exploits them the best he can. Of all the fighter subclasses, none is more clever than the Battle Master. Its many maneuvers resembles the numerous sword techniques Link has learned especially in the later games. Even in Smash, Link showcases how clever he is by being able to combine his arrows with his bombs and shoot a bomb arrow. To my knowledge, none of the other characters can combine their abilities like this in Smash.

Cavalier The subclass is poorly named, and was better in its initial name as the Knight, as that is really what this subclass is. It is the idea of the knight in shining armor. They can also be flavored as bodyguards, a traveling sellsword, or castle guards. So Link does not have to be glued to Epona to make use of this subclass. The main reason to want this subclass is the Warding Maneuver, as giving Link the chance to either block or reduce all damage he takes is going to seriously improve how well he can tank a hit, and help keep him in a fight longer.

PALADIN

More than any other class, the Paladin actually stands for something. They fight for a value or a belief. They swear their life to a cause and are prepared to die fighting for it. Link works on a lore level as a Paladin. Especially when he’s dedicated multiple lifetimes to the same cause. Across every timeline and game over screen, Link has always returned and stood in defiance against whatever evil may come.

Ancients This oath makes Link sworn to the forces of nature, such as the Great Fairy, and protecting the balance and harmony of the light, life, and love against death, decay, and darkness. The Ancients Paladin is all about protecting the balance in the world and valiantly opposing evil wherever it might arise. It also has a druidic or fey aspect, which kind of works for Link.

Crown With this vow, Link serves the Hyrulian Royal Family. This makes Link the princess’ personal knight, and an agent of lawfulness, order, and peacekeeping in the land. While 5e has backed away from typecasting Paladins as Lawful Good, this is probably the most Lawful subclass one could pick, as it places the authority of the royal family above all else.

Glory Instead of being sworn to the light or the law, the Glory Paladin is the harbinger of the goddesses. They are flavored as legendary heroes of destiny, possibly being demigods or the personal errand boys of the setting’s pantheon. This subclass is clearly focused on being a frontline warrior, and the features make Link a true force on the battlefield.

RANGER

Anyone who’s played Legend of Zelda knows that Link is very good at surviving. The games don’t tell you how to navigate the wilderness, Link just has to figure it out for himself. What’s more, Link may be willing to venture into the wilderness, but he’ll be hard-pressed to find many NPCs that far outside of settlements or cities. Yet what they fear, he thrives in. And it’s no wonder that this is the class most peole would assume for Link.

Hunter This conclave is the slayer of all things that threaten civilization. They can choose to be better at chipping away at one enemy, counter attack bigger monsters, or mow through hordes of minions with more ease by taking out multiple at a time. Especially at higher levels, this conclave excels at ripping apart Ganon’s forces with nary a golden curl out of place.

ROGUE

The rogue doesn’t need to be a wanted criminal on the lamb. They can be a clever fighter with a variety of skills and a knack for evasion. That speaks a lot more to Link’s skill set than one might assume at first glance. It’s not a perfect fit for Link, but it’s really not that inaccurate either.

Inquisitive This roguish archetype is defined by being clever in combat, looking for weak points to exploit. They’re also much more observant, making them better at discovering clues or secret passages, or telling when they’re being misled. At higher levels, their ability to look for weaknesses can even increase their sneak attack damage. This especially fits some of the older games where boss fights were focused on using items to exploit the dungeon boss’ weaknesses, rather than hacking away at their health bar. In these older titles, Link was less of a straight up warrior and more of a clever trickster pulling off strategic victories.

Scout The Scout Rogue has heavy Ranger vibes, as they get free expertise in Nature and Survival, enhanced mobility, the ability to disengage from fights more easily, and at higher levels become masters of ambushes. This fits well with Link’s sneakier sniper playstyle that can be done in Breath of the Wild, as Link can take out entire camps without ever being seen.

Thief While Link is not a standard cutpurse, Link is a treasure hunter, a dungeon delver, and the jokes about him robbing the people of Hyrule and breaking into people’s homes doesn’t exactly help. The thief also gets to use more magical items, allowing Link to use things such as enchanted instruments without being a bard.

WARLOCK

Link usually isn’t the hero of his own volition. He often starts his journey with Triforce of Courage, a source of power gifted by his patrons. It’s honestly a weak connection, but it loosely works, so I’m including it.

Celestial While this subclass is geared toward serving something other than a god, I don’t see any reason why a Celestial Warlock couldn’t serve the Triple Goddesses of Hyrule or even Hylia/Zelda directly.

Hexblade The most obviously martial warlock option, this is a good choice if you want to incorporate Fi into your character.

Link’s Toy Chest

Hero’s Sword - Longsword (+1-3) Mirror Shield - Repulsion Shield Hero’s Bow - Oathbow Gale Boomerang - Storm Boomerang Fire Rod - Wand of Fireballs (requires spellcasting) Mastersword - Sword of Zariel, Holy Avenger Longsword* Hylian Shield - Shield of the Hidden Lord Goddess Bow - Ephixis, Bow of Nylea Golden Gauntlets - Gauntlets of Ogre Power Zora Tunic - Cloak of the Manta Ray Pegasus Boots - Boots of Speed Hover Boots - Boots of Levitation Hook Shot - Rope of Climbing

SIDEKICKS

Sidekicks are a new edition from Tasha’s that let Link bring allies on his hero’s journey. Experts are skill monkeys who focus on Help actions, Spellcasters dip into the INT, WIS, or CHA spell lists, and Warriors are trained to fight and don’t have to talk, so they can be animals.

Epona - Defender Warrior Riding Horse Navi - Expert or Healer Spellcaster Sprite Sidon - Attacker Warrior Merfolk Sheik - Expert Noble (Elf) Wolf Link - Attacker Warrior Wolf

Theros Piety

The Piety System from Theros lets us be devout to a god and earn features from worshiping them. As far as I’m aware, this is an optional feature, and not every DM will make use of these, but if you’re able to, here’s a handy guide. These gods really stood out as the clear choices for Link to go with.

Iroas - God of Victory

Domains: War Virtues: Achieve a great victory, Overcome slim odds honorably, Defeat a foe in single combat, Perform a great feat of strength or skill Sins: Being a coward in battle, Beat an honorable foe through deceit, harm innocents Piety Bonus: +3 Learn Compelled Duel spell +10 Learn Crusader’s Mantle spell +25 For 1 minute, creatures cannot gain advantage on you +50 Increase STR or CHA by 2 to a max of 22

Keranos - God of Storms

Domains: Knowledge, Tempest Virtues: Solve a riddle or puzzle, defeat an unwise enemy, plan ahead for an upcoming challenge, build or restore a temple to Keranos Sins: Jeopardize others through foolishness, ignore a wise course of action, fail to plan for a challenge, give in to anger or self-destruction

Piety Bonus: +3 Add 1d6 lightning damage to melee attack up to INT mod turns. +10 Reroll a failed INT or WIS saving throw +25 Advantage on Initiative rolls +50 Increase INT or WIS by 2 to a max of 22

Nylea - Goddess of the Wild

Domains: Nature Virtues: Help any wild animal, stop those who hunt for sport or profit, win an archery competition, slay an aberration, fiend, or undead Sins: Kill an animal without reason, Dedicate a building to or make a sacrifice for any god (including Nylea), protect a city from a natural disaster

Piety Bonus: +3 Learn Hunter’s Mark +10 Learn Speak with Animals +25 Attacking creatures must pass DC 15 WIS save or change targets. +50 Increase DEX or WIS by 2 to a max of 22

Cunning Tactician

Battle Master Fighter (12) Inquisitive Rogue (8) Fighting Style: Dueling Maneuvers: Brace, Disarming Strike, Feinting Attack, Parry, Precision Attack, Riposte, Sweeping Attack Tools: Thieves’ Tools, Mason’s Tools

While Link is brave and strong, he is most defined by his clever mind and unorthodox solutions to boss fights. With this class split, Link has prioritized strategy and tactics over everything else. While it leaves him a little squishier, Link is still a very capable warrior. As a Battle Master, he got a free tool proficiency. Mason’s Tools allows Link to find secret passageways in stone walls, which most dungeons tend to be made of. On top of that, with his Feinting Attack, Link can give himself advantage, meaning he can use Sneak Attack even in a 1v1 fight, which fits his solo adventurer playstyle.

One-Man Army

Battle Master Fighter (12) Hunter Ranger (8) Fighting Style: Dueling, Archery Maneuvers: Brace, Disarming Strike, Feinting Attack, Parry, Precision Attack, Riposte, Sweeping Attack Hunter’s Prey: Colossus Slayer, Multiattack Defense Tools: Mason’s Tools

I used this build once in a level 10 campaign. 6 levels of Fighter, 4 levels of Ranger with a +2 Longsword, and let me tell you something. This build creamed the competition, which was the other PCs at the table, who were also built as level 10 characters. Link nearly defeated his first opponent in a single round, dealing around 70 damage between his four attacks. When I say this is Link’s “power” build, I mean it. I didn’t even sweat when an adult blue dragon showed up after the tournament ended, that’s how much faith I had in Link’s ability to fight. I honestly forgot to even use Link’s battle maneuvers, he was just dealing so much damage that it slipped my mind. You could swap Battle Master for Cavalier, but for me, the Battle Master is more accurate to Link’s favor of techniques over basic hack-and-slash.

RANGER SPELLS

1 Absorb Elements, Ensnaring Strike, Hunter’s Mark 2 Cordon of Arrows, Healing Spirit

The Hero of Hyrule

Battle Master Fighter (12) Glory Paladin (8) Fighting Style: Archery, Dueling Maneuvers: Brace, Disarming Strike, Feinting Attack, Parry, Precision Attack, Riposte, Sweeping Attack Tools: Mason’s Tools

As a Glory Paladin, Link is driven by a desire to be a legendary hero, and at least in the UA version, the Glory Paladin served the gods, as Link does. Like the two builds above, Link balances the brute might of the Glory Paladin with the tactile diversity of the Battle Master.

PALADIN SPELLS

1 Cure Wounds, Divine Favor, Guiding Bolt, Heroism, Protection from Evil and Good, Searing Smite, Thunderous Smite, Wrathful Smite 2 Branding Smite, Enhance Ability, Find Steed, Magic Weapon, Warding Bond

Oaths and Promises

Glory Paladin (12) Celestial Warlock (8) Fighting Style: Dueling Pact: Blade Invocations: Eldritch Smite, Improved Pact Weapon, Maddening Hex, Relentless Hex

The builds from here on are more for the flavor than necessarily Link’s character. As a Blade Pact Paladock, Link becomes a CHA-focused martial with some extra spell slots that turn his smiting sword strikes into a bokoblin slurry machine. This build focuses Link more as a servant of the gods than anything else. Just make sure he has the Hex spell, but you can replace Maddening Hex with Agonizing Blast if you want to use the Master Sword laser beam at full potential.

PALADIN SPELLS

1 Divine Favor, Guiding Bolt, Heroism, Protection from Evil and Good, Searing Smite, Thunderous Smite, Wrathful Smite 2 Branding Smite, Enhance Ability, Find Steed, Magic Weapon, Warding Bond 3 Blinding Smite, Crusader’s Mantle, Elemental Weapon, Haste, Protection from Energy

WARLOCK SPELLS

C Blade Ward, Booming Blade, Sword Burst 1 Armor of Agathys, Cure Wounds, Hex 2 Lesser Restoration, Misty Step, Shatter 3 Spirit Shroud, Summon Fey 4 Galder’s Speedy Courier

To Serve and Protect

Battle Master Fighter (12) Crown Paladin (8) Fighting Style: Dueling, Interception Maneuvers: Bait and Switch, Brace, Disarming Strike, Goading Strike, Parry, Riposte, Sweeping Attack Tools: Mason’s Tools

Link is Zelda’s knight, bodyguard, and servant. So this build prioritizes features that makes Link the loyal emissary of the Princess of Hyrule. As such, this build changes Link’s role to be more of a defender to the princess than a solo hero. This build assumes that the princess or someone else who needs to be protected is joining Link on his adventure.

PALADIN SPELLS

1 Command, Cure Wounds, Divine Favor, Heroism, Compelled Duel, Searing Smite, Thunderous Smite, Wrathful Smite 2 Branding Smite, Find Steed, Warding Bond, Zone of Truth

After all is said and done, I hope I gave everyone a lot to work with. Of course my suggestions are not law, and if nothing else, I hope it gives you an idea of how you want to build him. Last time I built Link, I gave one set build for him, but I still laid out other options. Recently though, I’ve been trying to show multiple builds at the end of my build posts to offer a wider idea of what building a character can look like. Happy 2021 everyone, and let’s hope this year goes smoother.

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aspenflower17 · 4 years ago

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Wrath is the Cat: Part 2

Hey everyone! I have a sweet fluff for you guys for Valentines Day! If you haven’t read the first part of this fic here’s the link for it. I’ve had this in the works for awhile now, so I hope you guys enjoy! This one has more Levi content too :) Know I love you all, and I hope you are happy this Valentine’s Day :)

Please note: I don’t think there’s any spoilers for season two of Obey Me in here, but there are spoilers for Fruits Basket. If you don’t want those, please come back and read at a different time. This will go on my master list, so you can always come back and read later :)

Satan/Mc

Word Count: 3,644

No warnings (unless you don’t like mild yelling from Satan), just fluff <3

“Welcome back, Mc!” Barbatos greeted.

“Hey! Glad to be back,” Mc grinned stepping out of the magic circle, “Is everything ready?”

“Just about.”

“Perfect. Thank you guys for helping me.”

“Of course. It’s not a problem. It will be nice not to have the brothers moping around everywhere.”

Mc laughed at that, pulling her bags down the stairs with her, “I can imagine.”

“In any case, it’s nice to see you again. Lord Diavolo wanted to be here to greet you, but he’s at RAD making sure none of the brother’s go home early today.”

“It is appreciated. I’ll make sure to drop by later and say hi to him.”

“See that you do. Now, let’s get you to the House of Lamentation.”

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Mc was impressed by how silent Barbatos could be when he wanted to be. He took in most of her luggage, demon strength and a tail allowing him to carry more than she ever could. Soon, everything was back in her old room, which looked exactly as she had left it.

“Well, if that is all, I shall be taking my leave,” Barbatos said quietly, both of them knowing that Levi was still at home.

“Yes. Thank you so much! I’ll be by when the brothers let me.”

“We’ll be looking forward to it,” Barbatos smiled, bowed and then left the room, shutting the door on his way out.

Mc sighed, smiling as she looked around her room, sitting on the bed. She knew she would soon be the focus of everyone’s attention, so she was enjoying the silence while it lasted. She also wanted to get at least a bit unpacked before she got swamped by the brothers. She got down on the floor, and wiggled the loose board on her bed base. It came away, just like she remembered. Looking into the space underneath, she smiled, the grimm she’d left before she’d come back still there. Looks like her hiding space for important things hadn’t been sniffed out by Mammon.

Scooting across the floor, she grabbed the bag that held all the valuables she’d collected from the human realm. She had been able to get a house sitter this time, but she didn’t know how long she’d be here this time and she didn’t want to risk losing these items. Some of them couldn’t be found from other humans anyway, mementos from her first time in the Devildom.

After securing the board, she returned to her bags. She figured, as she hadn’t actually talked to Lucifer about staying at his house, she shouldn’t unpack her clothes, though she was sure Lucifer would let her stay. She did need the small backpack that held little presents from the human realm for the brothers. With that, she left her room to go see her true friend.

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Mc stood in front of Levi’s room, a bit nervous that Levi wouldn’t appreciate her dropping in on him unannounced. He could be finicky about the strangest things, and Mc didn’t want him to be upset with her. Still, she had come all this way and she had decided he would be the first one she visited with. Though it probably wouldn’t help much with his sin, Mc had to try to give him something to hold onto when she inevitably spent time with the other brothers. That in mind, Mc knocked on his door.

“... Password?”

“Tis I, Henry returned from abroad to the Lord of Shadows!”

There was silence from the other side of the door, until, “... Mc… Is that really you?”

“Would Henry lie?”

“No… But Mammon would.”

“Well, luckily for you, it’s not Mammon… Come on Levi! Open the door. I haven’t seen you in forever!... Fine then. Since you obviously don’t want to spend anytime with me, I’ll just let everyone else know I’m back.”

“Y… You haven’t told anyone else?”

“Nope, but it looks like all my sneaking around was for naught. I was hoping to discuss the plot of “My True Friend Just Returned from Another Realm and I Don’t Know What to Do Because I Think It’s My Brother Pranking Me,” The door opened a crack, and an orange eye peered out, widened suddenly, and a tail shot out grabbing Mc by the waist and pulling her into his room. Mc was caught in a tight hug before Levi suddenly pulled away, face red.

“There’s no anime by that title,” he mumbled.

“Nice to see you too Levi,” Mc beamed, “Though you pulled out of that hug way too soon.”

"W-Well, I guess if you don't mind hugging me, I could- Eep!"

Mc hugged Levi tightly. Though he protested lightly, he eventually hugged her back, causing Mc to chuckle lightly. Sometimes her otaku best friend was a bigger tsundere than Mammon.

"How long are you back for?" Levi asked, still hugging Mc.

"Not sure. Diavolo and I set this up, but we didn't talk about when I needed to head back up to the human realm. Today, I'm going to need to leave you around the time RAD gets out. Until then, I'm spending time with you. I even got Diavolo to dismiss you from class the rest of the day."

"Mc, I honestly don't know how I ended up with such a great friend. To think, a weird, gross otaku-"

"Hey! Stop saying that! You're talking about my best friend you know."

Levi seemed taken aback, until the words sunk in. He then grinned widely, and hugged Mc of his own volition, "I missed you so much!"

"I missed you too Levi."

"Can I tell you about my new favorite manga?" Levi asked, pulling back, eyes shining.

"Of course! Keeping up the human realm's new anime is too hard, much less a whole different realm."

Mc had never seen Levi smile so wide, as he began going off about an anime that Mc had a sneaking suspicion was loosely based off her first year in the Devildom, though she'd never say anything to Levi about it. She'd found it was better to let him figure these things out on his own. Mc had figured he would spend most of the time she'd devoted to him to run out of steam. She'd been gone for a while after all. Oddly enough, he only took half the time she had expected him to. When she had first come to the Devildom, Levi had talked nonstop about anything and everything that interested him. After listening to him enough and watching the way his brothers would interact with him, it was because no one listened to him enough. No matter how many online people he talked to he, just like everyone else, craved irl interactions, despite what he may say. Mc had assumed her return would warrant the same reaction, but he seemed to be doing as well as when she had left, something she was extremely grateful for.

“So, how have you been?” Levi asked.

Mc had to blink a couple times. Of course Levi was considerate in his own way, but she wasn’t sure he’d ever asked her that particular question before. As Envy, it seemed he avoided it as a matter of principle, not wanting to trigger his sin more than he had to.

“Ah, good, for the most part. I don’t mind the human realm nearly as much as I thought I would.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I always hated going back home after a vacation. Just settling back into my normal routine, after I had just spent all that time experiencing something new seemed so counterintuitive. But… I guess after spending so long down here, going back seemed almost like going on vacation again. Truth be told though, I honestly just wanted to come back here. I missed you all so much, especially you and Satan,” Mc cringed inwardly, realizing her mistake of mentioning Satan after the fact, “I was so glad Diavolo allowed me to come back.”

“Speaking of Satan, thank you.”

“Huh?”

“Yeah. I really didn’t want you to leave. I didn’t think it was fair that the human realm got you back when I really needed you here. You’re the first person I’ve honestly connected with in a long time and the thought of you leaving was pretty unbearable. Satan’s made it so much easier though. He’s not as great as you, but… we actually get along really well. We didn’t talk much before you came, and it was a little weird at first, especially when it seemed like he would get angry at me for no reason. I’ve since realized he mostly just wanted to be listened to, and I think he’s been a lot more patient with me. Having you gone has only been bearable because of him,” Levi ended with a smile.

“Oh Levi! I’m so happy! I was hoping you two would get along after I left!” Mc tackle hugged her best friend.

“H-Hey! Why are you so touchy today?”

“Sorry. I just really did miss you,” Mc smiled, happy to be back where she belonged.

Levi blushed, but smiled, “I missed you too.”

“Oh! I almost forgot!” Mc reached around for her bag, but stopped turning back with her eyes narrowed, “Close your eyes.”

Levi humphed, but closed his eyes anyway. Mc rustled in her backpack, grabbing the item she was looking for, and looked back at Levi, satisfied that his eyes were still closed, “Now, hold out your hands.”

Levi sighed again, but put out his hands. Mc placed one of the items she’d found in his hands, “Okay, open them!”

Levi instantly looked down and gasped loudly, “IS THIS...!?!”

“Yup. I happened upon these while I was shopping around in an estate sale antique store. I didn’t even know they made a leather bound TSL set,”

Levi just sat with his mouth hanging open, looking from Mc to the book over and over.

“Oh, if you’re worried, don’t be. I have the whole set. I just couldn’t carry them all over here, and some of them are still at my house. I figure we can go and get them soon,” Levi continued to open and shut his mouth wordlessly, “I also checked and yes, these are legit. The founders of the first TSL fan club begged to be allowed to make leather bound copies of the books. Christopher thought it was such a good idea that he had his publishers make leather bound copies for each of them. Best part is, it’s a magic item, so each time a new edition is released, a leather bound copy gets sent to everyone who has a complete set, which there can only be eight of since there were eight founding members. All the sets are numbered as well… So you should open it up and look inside.”

Levi broke out of his trance enough to open to the title page to see, it was number 3 of 8, it was signed, and a letter to the Lord of Shadows from Christopher Peugeot himself.

“H-How did you even…. I’ve only heard rumors of rumors about these. I… How?”

Mc laughed, delighted to have surprised the third born, “It’s amazing what you can find in little shops.”

“This must have cost a fortune!”

“Well, it did cost more than anyone else’s gift, but when I got back to the human realm I found I just kept coming into money. I think I have a certain brother of yours to thank for that.”

Mc watched Levi roll his eyes and take a deep breath, almost always a precursor to an envious rant, silently cursing herself for bringing up any of his brothers during their hangout time. He then stopped, releasing the breath. He lowered his head, and when he raised it again, he was not only calm he was smiling, “I’m… glad you were comfortable in the human realm.”

It was Mc’s turn to sit there in shock, mouth working wordlessly. Though her best friend wasn’t terrible or anything, she had never seen him stop an envious tirade. Levi lowered his head bashfully, “I… mentioned to Satan one day I was jealous of his control over his sin, and he offered to help me to contain mine better. I-I-I wanted to surprise you when you got back.”

“You didn’t have to change on my account Levi. I think you’re wonderful the way you are.”

“I-I know. It’s just… Satan is super cool and confident, and… Though normies still scare me, I… I would like some more control in my life. At least enough that next time I summon Lotan, it’s on purpose and not just because I can’t control myself.”

“Well, as long as this is coming from a desire to change yourself for you and not someone else, I fully support it! I want you to be as happy as you can be, and if gaining a bit more control over your sin is what you want, I’ll be your cheerleader!”

“Oh! Could you dress up like Ruri-chan in episode 64 then?! I’ve always thought you’d look perfect in her cheer leading outfit!” When Mc started laughing, Levi blushed, hiding his face behind his hand, “O-Or you could just forget I said anything…”

“Oh Levi! I’ve missed you too much!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mc wandered the hallway to Satan’s room. She hadn’t had much of a chance to be in the house during the school day, and the quiet was deafening. No yelling. No running. No strange life-or-death situations to worry about. Just stillness as Mc got reacquainted with the house.

When she turned down the hallway to Satan’s room, the smell of books overwhelmed her senses and she had to swallow her tears. This scent had haunted her dreams, always leaving her disappointed when she’d woken up.

Then, she was finally at his door. She raised a shaking fist to the door, and knocked on the off chance Satan had stayed home from RAD. After getting no response, she opened the door, her body instantly relaxing. She was back,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Satan opened the door to the house, trying to remain calm. Mc had rescheduled their phone call through text this morning, which had caused him to space out at RAD and get an answer wrong in front of the entire class. Then, Mammon and Asmo had interrupted his walk home and had started to argue the entire way home.

“Don’t get on my case about it. It’s not my fault if you’re not popular on Devilgram,” Asmo huffed.

“N- I- Not popular?! Who do ya think ya talkin’ to?! I’m plenty popular! Just cuz ya sl-”

“ENOUGH!” Satan bellowed, rounding on his brothers, “I can’t believe I have to deal with you two today! If you continue to bother me-” he cut off suddenly, a familiar smell dampening his anger. How was Mc’s scent this strong? His brother’s looked at him curiously, “Just… leave me alone,” he finished, turning around and making his way to his room.

I can’t believe I’m upset enough about Mc cancelling our phone call today, I'm hallucinating her scent. Honestly, it’s just a phone call. Plus, all she did was reschedule it. I’ll probably be able to talk to her tomorrow. She’s also never had to reschedule one before. She was probably just super busy. I think she did mention something about moving. I can’t be so selfish I don’t allow her to do what she needs to. Satan sighed, opening his door.

“Welcome home.”

Satan snapped his head up to see Mc sitting on his bed, a huge grin on her face.

“M… C? You’re here?”

“In the flesh,” Mc giggled, drinking in his surprised expression.

In an instant, she was trapped in his embrace, “What are you doing here?” he murmured into her shoulder.

She smiled, stroking the back of his head, “Well, I’ve missed you and everyone else really badly. So, I talked to Diavolo and Barbatos and they helped me plan all of this. I don’t think they even told Lucifer about this.”

“I assume you already went and saw Levi?”

“Wh- How did you know?”

“Just a hunch. It’s a good idea too, visiting the Avatar of Envy first.”

“I made him promise not to say anything to anyone until I tell them. That way, we shouldn’t be interrupted.”

“I appreciate that. None of them are going to be very happy about that though.” “I know, but you’re more important to me.” Satan lifted his head from her shoulder, noting the small blush she’d developed, “ Do you mean that?” “Of course I do,” she smiled, blush deepening.

His heart leapt into his throat, and he found he couldn’t speak.

“I… You found the letter, right?”

“Huh? Oh, yes. I did.”

Mc nodded, “Well, I think I can finally tell you what I wanted to,” Satan sat back a bit, though he kept a hand on her knee, “After coming here and meeting you all, I realized I couldn’t just “go back” to the human world. I mean, obviously I did, and it was fine, but you guys mean too much for me to just… forget about. So, I’ve been talking with Diavolo. He said I wouldn’t be able to just move here unfortunately, but in exchange for my help with uniting the three realms, he told me you can come visit me in the human world whenever you want, as long as you keep up on your school work, and I can come visit here once every four months.

“He might allow more in the future, but this is what he’s given me for now. I… Uhh…” her cheeks turned crimson, “Have also been asking him what a human and demon relationship would look like, and if it could be possible. There’s still a lot of details that need to be ironed out, but he wanted me to ask if something like that would be…” Mc trailed off, and Satan stayed silent, needing her to completely finish her thought. Could it be?...

“You see, I… I love you. I was drawn to you the moment I first saw you, and… The feelings just got stronger over time. Leaving you was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Being back home, I realized every guy I met could never hold a candle to you. I… I can’t imagine my life without you, and I hope you feel the same way,” she finished in a rush, eyes on her hands.

Once Satan had recovered from the shock, he chuckled, bringing her face up to meet his, “I love you too,” he smiled, his heart light as he said the words he’d wanted to say for a long time now. The relief and happiness that flooded her face were more than enough payment for the wait, “Can I kiss you?”

Mc’s grin grew even wider, “Of course you can,” and so he did. He never intended a small kiss, and Mc soon found that out as his arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her into him. Her arms went around his neck, scooting into his lap. Satan had never felt more satisfied or complete in his life.

When they finally broke the kiss, they pressed their foreheads together, both a bit breathless. After a bit, Satan broke the silence, “So, you asked Diavolo’s permission to date me? Should I feel offended?”

“I hope you don’t. I just wanted to see what was required before I started barking up the wrong tree.”

“Well, I appreciate you going through the trouble. It will probably be a lot easier to proceed with his okay. How’d you get him to allow me access to the human realm?”

“With a lot of begging and promises that I’d keep you out of trouble. I hope you’re okay with that,” Mc looked at him in worry.

“Hmmm… Normally I don’t like the thought of someone trying to control me. But, as long as you don’t overstep your bounds and I get to see you, I’m alright with it,” he answered truthfully.

“Well, we have time to figure it all out now that I know you return my feelings,” Mc smiled, “I never want you to feel second rate, especially with me.”

“So, we can be open and honest with one another right?”

“Of course!”

“Good. I’m glad,” Satan said, kissing her forehead, “So… What do you want to do now?”

“Honestly, anything is good with me. As long as I’m with you,” she smiled happily, making his heart melt.

“Do you maybe want to go upstairs? I’m afraid we’re going to have someone come bursting in at any second.”

“I’d love that. I’ve missed my comfy chair. Where’d you even find it? I’ve tried finding one like it, and I can’t.”

“Well, let’s just say, I called in a favor from a friend.”

“How cryptic,” Mc chuckled, as she made her way up the staircase.

“Well, I think an air of mystery looks good on me,” Satan replied.

“Maybe I should start calling you Sherlock then.”

“He solved mysteries though.”

“He was a bit mysterious himself,” Mc countered, waiting at the top of the stairs for Satan and then walking with him to their chairs.

“If you say so,” Satan smiled.

Mc looked around, visibly relaxing back into the space. That’s when she saw it. Right across from them was the Fruits Basket set she’s given to Satan. Noticing where she was looking, Satan answered her question, “Tohru.”

“Huh?”

“Tohru’s my favorite character. Kyo almost won, but… You’re a lot like Tohru with what you’ve done for me and my family. Mc, I hope I can be your Kyo from here on out,” he gazed into her eyes, feeling his face heating up.

Mc smiled back at him, giving him a soft kiss on the nose then forehead, “You will always be the cat to my rice ball.”

#obey me!#obey me #obey me! swd #obey me satan/mc #obey me satan #obey me levi #obey me leviathan #obey me fluff #obm

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nice-kill-tanaka · 4 years ago

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Heyhihello!! Can i request a match up for ohshc?

This was from another request from different acc i did weeks ago so that requesting would be much easier, ill label the numbers so that its clearer for you to understand!

2. Hobbies

Ill add things i like here too, if thats ok 😸

:food, music (classic, alternative/rock, pop and many moree!) books, anime/manga, science, literature, daydreaming, laughter/smiles, kickboxing, volleyball, archery, knives and guns, cold weather, blue skies, strong wind, horror /thriller.

3. What i want to find in a s/o

4. What i dislike

5. Personality

Im also a capricorn and libra ascendant that is infj-t mbti personality type!

Thank you very much ♥️

[🌄 @michiyonakamura requested one (1) regular Ouran High School Host Club matchup. I have just the ingredients for that! Sit tight while I get to work.🌌]

Not to sound weird, but I love your energy 😭!! I admire the fact that you have such a good sense of self. I’ll make you proud, bud! 😤

(Btw, since you didn’t clarify your pronouns, I’ll just use they/them for now. I’ll change them if you want!)

And, it looks like you have an admirer:

🌷Tamaki Suoh🌷

🌱Humble Beginnings🌱

In school, even in your second year middle school class, you knew the rumors far too well. The whispers that reminded you of viper hisses that kept one name relevant in your mind

The bastard son of Yuzuru Suoh, Tamaki

Despite the other kids explaining to you (Multiple times, at that) that the boy wasn’t worth talking to, you never understood the stigma around him

Maybe it was because your parents didn’t treat illegitimate children like the sin it was in the elite professional community?? But, you were genuinely confused at your classmates, who were so ready to deny the humanity of the new kid (Because of something he couldn’t control, no less)

You eventually asked for the opinion of your “friend”, Kyoya Ootori (Really, it was just an acquaintanceship built off the request of Kyoya’s parents. You knew that, but decided not to say anything out of liking spending time with him.). To which he responded that building a relationship with someone with such a horrible status held no benefit. But, he also knew that fact would hardly stop you

And it didn’t ❤️

You started your mini-mission with simple observation

Through watching at a distance, you learned that even though Tamaki was lowkey (highkey) shunned by his classmates, he was still the sweetest person imaginable towards them

Something told you he understood why he had the social standing he did. But, the fact that he chose to not act bitter made you feel warmer on the inside

You really, really wanted to talk to Tamaki. And hardly because you pitied him. But, because he seemed like too good and interesting a person to pass off

After further observation, you found out that Tamaki also loved music! (As he took a classical music elective)

And suddenly, you had your peace offering

The day after your discovery, you went to the library on campus and got to work. The idea was that you’d print out a ton of sheet music for piano and offer your friendship by giving it to Tamaki

You ended up printing out “’Moonlight’ Sonata��, “The Entertainer”, “Brandenburg Concerto No. 3″, and many others like them, putting them in a folder with a sticky note signed with your name:

“Wanna sit together at lunch sometime? :D —(Y/N)”

After that, you left the decision up to Tamaki. Sure, you wanted to be friends with him, but letting him come to you would be a surefire way to gauge his interest

The next day, you sat at your usual spot with Kyoya at lunch, who expressed his doubts about your efforts paying off

And while you did acknowledge that your little plan could always fall through, you kept your hopes up. The notion of making your life a bit brighter with The Power Of Friendship™️ made you giddy

As your talking veered into the subject of your curiosities about how the cafeteria’s gourmet lunches managed to be so good every day, you noticed a shift in Kyoya’s gaze. Instead of looking straight at you, his line of vision looked like it was going just past you

“Ah, excuse me? You’re (L/N) (F/N), right?”

You immediately turned around at the sound of the polite voice behind you

Well, what do you know!!

The lean boy behind you stood patiently, familiar folder in hand. His blond hair and near violet eyes only complimented his sweet-looking face. He was exactly who you were hoping to see!!

“Oh! Uh, yeah, that’s me!”

“I got the music you left on my desk, and I wanted to thank you! You have amazing taste in music.”

Your heart: ❤️✨😊🌺☀️

“Oh- geez, thanks! I kinda thought you’d like them. Wanna, maybe...sit and talk about ‘em?”

Tamaki brightened and you both looked towards Kyoya for permission. The two of you faced each other again once he gave a brief, exasperated nod

“Of course!”

🌳Flourishing Love🌳

Together, you, Kyoya, and Tamaki became the respective heart, mind, and soul of the Ouran High School Host Club

As the naturally likable manager, you were often a bridge between the two conflicting views of leadership. You brought a certain empathetic sense of responsibility to the table, which helped in most club functions

Tamaki, who you became rather close to, began to fall for your love of life, and your love for others

Even he was surprised by how many other clubs you helped out in, and made it his mission to make sure you don’t spread yourself too thin ((like he often did-))

Through you, Tamaki began to learn about all of your hobbies. And every day, he’d love you a little more

Your crush developed more slowly, but surely. You started seeing Tamaki as a romantic option when he started asking for you to teach him about the many things you enjoy. No one had shown that type of interest before, and honestly?? It was a little flustering

Soon enough, Tamaki couldn’t take it anymore. He needed to ask you out before the opportunity went away!

(((Sure, there was the issue of his customers being upset about his relationship. But, Tamaki would cross that bridge when he got to it, wouldn’t he?)))

It was actually in the library that Tamaki officially confessed. He gave you a book that you had already read, insisting that you look through it again. Albeit, confused, you complied by opening to the page bookmarked by a red rose. There, you saw a sticky note with a specific paragraph number written on it

The paragraph you read was a love confession that perfectly described Tamaki’s feelings

You looked up from the book to meet Tamaki’s eyes, that were free of the exaggerated version of himself. He was serious about this, and serious about you

After you two got together, Tamaki would’ve loved to flaunt his new relationship, but you eventually convinced him to keep it under wraps for now

In fact, he found the Secret Forbidden Relationship™️ shtick kind of ✨exciting✨

However, he will at some point get impatient and accidentally out your little romance to the Host Club (Kyoya had known all along of course)

One of your first dates was watching a “light” thriller at your place. In other words, the movie scared the crap out of Tamaki, while you comforted him like the knight in shining armor you are ☺️

Being as compassionate as he is, Tamaki would love easing you into becoming more verbally expressive. The improvement isn’t necessarily for him, since his higher understanding of other people means he can interpret how you feel too. But, he knows that taking that change is important to you, whether you’ve outright said it or not

Tamaki will become a lot more adventurous with you and all of your interests. The rest of his friends are actually concerned about his physical health 😅

During the winter months, you and Tamaki made it a habit of going out on days below freezing, and cuddling at a library/cafe

Expect many, many chocolate roses from Tamaki in the places you frequent, with sweet little love notes attached to the stem

^The notes also include polite reminders of tasks you may have forgotten throughout the day

The reason Tamaki loved dating you (And not just you in general) was because you two had gotten together of your own volition. No outside forces like wealthy family or meddling friends were involved. This relationship belonged to only you two, and that fact couldn’t be taken away 💕

\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

[🌌 There you go bud! That’s one matchup for the road. Hopefully it lasts for a while, but if it doesn’t, feel free to come back! I’d be thrilled to see you again.🌄] —Reagan

#caravan commodities #special bindles #matchup #michiyonakamura.traveler #michiyonakamura.request #ohshc matchup #ouran high school host club #ohshc #ohshc x reader #SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG #BEING GROUNDED HAS NO BENEFITS #I HOPE YOU LIKE IT MICHI-KUN

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years ago

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Survey #391

“if you wanna soar with vultures, you’ll have to swallow crow”

Have you ever been to Australia? No. I want to visit a friend there, but honestly, Australia scares me too much lmao. That place is like, the Hard mode in life. Who was the last person you know to have a birthday? My sister's husband just had his. Are you wearing a necklace? If so, describe it. No. Do you know anyone who is left-handed? My best fren. Ever wear out a CD? What was it? Haha, yeah... I caused a few scratches on Ozzy's Black Rain, as well as one more of his, where the album name is surprisingly evading me. What’s your favorite card game? Magic: The Gathering. What’s your favorite fast food meal? Burgers or chicken tenders are usually my go-to, depending on the place. Where is the best restaurant you’ve ever eaten in at? The Cheesecake Factory. @_@ Lamb chops or pork chops? I've actually never tried lamb chops before, but I've always thought they look yummy. If you HAD to pick ONE song to listen to for the rest of your life, and that would be the only song you ever heard, what would it be? "Life Won't Wait" by Ozzy Osbourne, probably. It's very motivating. Ever heard of Shinedown? Yeah, I like 'em. They're one of Dad's faves. What size is your bed? Queen. What is the first meal you remember eating? Hell if I know. What was the first movie you ever saw? I also don't remember. What percentile of your class were you in? The top. Can you name every place you’ve ever had sex? I probably could, but I'm not going to. What forms of birth control have you used? The pill and also just not having a sex life lmao. Do you use sponges or dishcloths when doing the dishes? A sponge. What’s your favorite song on the top twenty right now? I have zero clue what's in the top twenty. Ever punched a wall? No. What was the last bug you killed and what did you use? An ant in the house. My fingers. Ever get pulled over by the cops and get away without a ticket? I've never been pulled over. What was your first legal alcoholic drink? A margarita, I think? What’s the most expensive things your parents ever bought you? Probably this laptop. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought? My snake. Or my most recent tattoo, idr. What is your favorite cover song? I think Disturbed's "Sound of Silence" is unbeatable as a cover. Well, or Johnny Cash's "Hurt." Both SLAUGHTER the originals. Did you ever drop out of school? College, three times. Ever raise a child that wasn’t your own for more than 3 months? No. Strangest medical procedure ever performed on you? Considering the location, having a pilonidal cyst drained by pushing on it. Jesus FUCKING Christ it hurt so goddamn bad. Does the place you work have music playing? What sort? I don’t have a job. Do you use Windows, Mac, Linux, or something else entirely? Windows. Do you cut tags out of clothing so they don’t itch and bother you? Yes. How many times a year do you go on vacation? Zero, generally. What is your favorite time period in history to learn about? The Holocaust. What’s the saddest report you have ever seen on the news? *shrug* I don't watch the news. In your honest opinion, what is the scariest sea creature you know? Putting aside my illogical fear of whale sharks, probably giant squid. Like no thank u. What superpower do you think would be the most handy in times of trouble? Teleportation. Do you believe there is just one love for everyone, or…? No. There are WAY too many people in the world for that. Plus, you're talking to a person who has been in love with two different individuals, and both were perfectly valid feelings. Why are you best friends with your best friend? She's just simply amazing. Strong, funny, intelligent, caring, supportive, loyal... She's, again, amazing. Do you world peace is truly a possibility in the future? Realistically, no. But it's nice to imagine. Pretend you are a really good cook, what meal would you make? *shrug* It would depend on what I wanted to eat. What do you think of when you look at the stars? Just the vastness of everything, and I wonder what it's like up there in outer space. If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked? Dead? Their shells are part of their actual skeletal structure. What’s one thing you feel you must do in your life before it ends? Just... feel like I did something. What Disney princess are you most like? Personality-wise, I mean. Maybe Belle? To be totally honest, I don't really remember the details of most of their personalities. What do you think is the most important thing in this life is? Love. Do you use any acne medication? Not anymore. Have you ever tried to learn another language? How did it go? I took Latin for one semester, and it was hard as FUCK. I quickly changed to German next semester and did that for all four available classes. Do you still have a landline phone in your home? No. Throughout a typical week, which places are you likely to go? I go to the TMS therapy office every weekday, and I might ride with my mom to pick up groceries or something. How often do you use your webcam, if you even have one that is? Never anymore because my mic doesn't work on this laptop, so there's no reason to. Do you have a lock number or pattern for your phone? Neither, actually. What was the last thing you bought from a liquor store? Mom bought a nice bottle of some pink lemonade Smirnoff the other day for us to try, but she left it at my sister's. ;-; It looked soooo good. Is there any cereal in your house? What kind? Yeah. Mom got some Honey Nut Cheerios and Reese's Puffs. What's the most number of people you've ever lived with? Excluding myself, I wanna say five. Do you celebrate St. Patrick's Day? No. Do you have any pets? How long have you had them? I've had Venus forrrr... I want to say four years, and Roman for two, I think. What's your favourite kind of cheese? American. Have you danced in the rain? No. Who is your favorite person to text? Sara. What’s your favorite brand of jeans? I haven't worn jeans in many years. Do you enjoy Mario games? Not especially. Mario Kart is fun, though. What’s your favorite online game? World of Warcraft. Have you ever been hit with a ball in gym class? Yes. That shit hurts. Who was last to cook for you? My mom. Would you ever wish to explore a cave? YES!!!!! You see the person you fell hardest for. What do you do? Freeze, physically and mentally. Have you ever ridden in a car with someone who was high? Yes, because I was afraid to say no. Did you ever date the last person you kissed? Yes. Have you ever held a snake? Plenty of times. How often do you have friends over to your house? Never. Have you ever had a boss who acted unprofessionally? No. Who was the last person who cried around you? Why did they start crying? Was it unexpected? My mom, because she always feels unwanted at Ashley's house. It wasn't unexpected, honestly. She cries a lot in the car when she leaves my sister's house, honestly. It's heartbreaking. Do you have any exercises you do everyday? No. :/ Are you more of a dog or cat person? I'm a cat person. That only becomes more apparent with time, really. Have you ever had a dream of stabbing someone? I probably have, given I've had nightmares of strangling someone, punching and slapping people... all kinds of stuff. My nightmares are so fucking violent and I hate it. Would you ever have a bird as a pet? No. Have you ever had to speak at a funeral? No. Do you know someone who’s been cremated? My dog, as well as my younger sister's old pup. And Mom's. What is your favorite animated movie? The Lion King. Did your grandparents teach you anything? To not be horrendously old-fashioned and to never have kids, yes. Congrats, Grandma, I took both things to heart. Do you want/have a Bachelor's degree? No. Are you into superheroes? Who's your favourite? Not massively, no. I like Deadpool (yeah, yeah, antihero, whatever) and Spider-Man. Have you ever played Cards Against Humanity? Did you like it? Yes to both. Have you ever played a drinking game? Which ones? I don't think so. Did you ever play Neopets when you were younger? Yes, I LOVED them. Sometimes I'm still tempted to make a new account, I shit you not, lol. Have you ever been to Mexico? No. Have your parents ever worked in medicine? My mom was a pharmacy technician or some title like that for a long time. Is there anything unusual about your house? I don't think so? How many serious relationships have you been in? Two. Do you listen to Rise Against? I only know "Re-education (Through Labor)," but I LOVE that song. When was the last time you congratulated someone? It was probably something on Facebook, but idr. Have you ever taken care of a newborn baby? Go no, I could never. How old were you when you got your ears pierced? I don't remember my age, but old enough where I did it of my own volition. Do you snore when you sleep? No. Surprising for someone with sleep apnea as horrendous as mine. What was the last type of burger you ate? I had a McDouble from McDonald's a few nights ago.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''queen for queen'' by motionless in white

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sharpnothashtag · 2 years ago

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Christian Leadership

All my life, people have called me a leader and told me that God had called me to be one. Here's why that made me have an absolute meltdown in my late 20s.

1) I only led (sang loudly, spoke up in class, took initiative to seek clarification, took control in crises, etc.) is because no one else would. Someone had to, so I did. And I HATED every second of it. It does NOT feel natural. It feels like my muscles become bone and then attempt to exit my skin of their own volition. Every ounce of stomach acid threatens to leave me.

2) and very importantly, to the point of the crisis part of things, I was in charge because I had no regard for my life. If it was my life on the line, it was no big deal.

3) I DIDN'T WANT TO. I just knew I could get the conversation going in ice breaker situations or Awkward Youth Bible Study. Being a PK usually lends you to stuff like this. You make eye contact with the speaker, and you nod at their assertions to reassure them that you're listening.

4) not everyone can be a leader. It's literally impossible. If everyone is a leader, who are they leading? If you have no followers, you have nothing (no cause, no group, no choir, etc.)

5) if there have to be followers for leaders to lead, they REALLY have to be intelligent enough to think for themselves. If they aren't, they won't be able to know when the leader needs to be kept accountable to the most vulnerable of their followers.

6) I have confidence issues. The more you learn, the less you know. How can I lead if I have no idea where I'm going?

7) I can be inconsistent. If people are depending on me and I fail, wtf are they going to do?

There are so many more things to say about that, but I want to address a comparison Jesus made. He called us sheep. Here's what I know about sheep:

They stink.

Their fur is really cozy and good for your skin.

They're not the smartest animals.

They're vulnerable.

They have a pack mentality.

They're honestly SUPER CUTE.

You know what? WE stink. Like, a lot. If we don't practice our best hygiene, others notice pretty easily.

WE are safest in our own skin. Generally, our comfort zones are there for a reason.

WE aren't smart. Just...it's not hard to figure that out.

WE are vulnerable. I'm making myself more so by writing this out.

WE are all in this together. Or are we?

If people are going to push us to be something we're not, we're going to splinter off from those people. We seek out affirmation.

I am a worker. I am a follower. I am a listener. I'm a crier. I'm a mezzo. I'm female-bodied. I'm trans. I'm committed. I'm a teacher. I'm a protector. I'm a parent. I'm a hugger. I'm depressed. I'm anxious. I'm spacey. I'm a trekkie. I'm emotional. I'm an animal lover. I'm a cleaner. I'm a singer. I'm busy. I'm traumatized. I'm hilarious. I'm random. I'm ready. I'm unprepared. I'm nothing, and yet I am everything.

You know what I'm not? I am NOT a leader.

And I'm tired of people thinking that that's a bad thing.

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interstellarbroadcast · 6 years ago

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My top 5 books read in 2018

With 2018 drawing to a close, I thought I’d take a step back and identify my favorite books I’ve read this year. I had set a goal of 24 books for myself at the beginning of the year and managed to surpass it by reading a grand total of 30 books! Here’s to another year full of books!

5 – Second Foundation (Isaac Asimov)

Asimov is undoubtedly the king of science fiction. Time and time again I find myself blown away by his fantastic tales. The key elements that make an Asimov what they are it’s unique and bold ideas and it’s unparalleled world-building. Second Foundation is the finale in the Foundation trilogy. The trilogy starts strong, with Foundation laying the requisite expository groundwork despite being a bit slow towards the end, and continues on to Foundation and Empire, a painfully slow novel that had interesting ideas marred by uninteresting characters and a glacial pace. However, for those who persevere to the final act of Foundation and Empire, they are rewarded with a faster paced story involving new concepts and a sudden shift in narrative style. This new style persists into Second Foundation, which can be seen as the distilled essence of what makes the Foundation trilogy a must-have on many science fiction fans’ shelves. Second Foundation has an interesting premise – one that is thankfully complemented by even more interesting characters.

4 – Words of Radiance (Brandon Sanderson)

For me, Words of Radiance ended up being one of those books that I started reading and then forgot about halfway through, only to pick it up again and marathon through the rest of it during a flight. Brandon Sanderson has really raised the stakes in this book, the sequel to Way of Kings. Words of Radiance is essentially an anime in prose and any shounen fan will instantly match Kaladin as your typical anime protagonist. If you’re a weeb looking for some good fantasy to pick up, look no further. I’ve already added shouting the oaths while striking a pose to my daily routine, right after my morning kamehameha practice.

3 - Word by word: The secret life of dictionaries (Kory Stamper)

I’ve always hated dictionaries. As a kid my mom would often hand me a dictionary and tell me that I had to “expand my vocabulary”. However, like many people, I’ve always had a sense of respect and deference towards dictionaries – the absolute authority on language and how it must be used. This book really shattered that illusion and presented an entirely alternate idea of a dictionary and it’s role as an attempt to capture, record and preserve language and it’s uses. Kory Stamper is an amazing author, and this book will take you through a journey that will open your eyes to the wonderful world of dictionaries.

2 - The Righteous Mind: Why Good People are Divided by Politics and Religion (Jonathan Haidt)

This book was recommended to me during a drunken conversation about the nature of morality. It was described to me as a book that would make me re-examine every notion I’ve ever held about not just morality, but about how I view society and social constructs as a whole. The book has certainly lived up to that lofty description. Reading The Righteous Mind has not only helped me be more empathetic and understanding of others’ viewpoints and thought processes but has also helped me analyze and evaluate my own inner compass and has led my to discovering a better framework for judging my own actions. What I liked about this book most was that the author was not asking the reader to adopt his way of thinking or to agree with his ideas. Instead, the book presents its ideas freely and openly – not trying to sell you on a particular notion, but rather just present a viewpoint that you can think about, and incorporate into your own paradigms. In this political era marked by hypocrisy and divisive media, this book could definitely help us come together and progress as a society.

1 - Flowers for Algernon (Daniel Keyes)

I’ve heard from many people who had to read this book for high school literature classes describe it as boring. Luckily, I read it of my own volition and found it to be one of the most interesting books I’ve ever read. Before reading the book, I read the short story and found it to be a really interesting premise. The main character’s journey through intellectual augmentation and eventual diminishment explores a vast emotional depth and serves as a reminder that most things in life are impermanent. Daniel Keyes did a fantastic job illustrating his character’s emotional states and the book literally had me on the edge of my seat.

#book #reading #bringing this dead blog back alive #Happy New Year

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fredyates1992 · 4 years ago

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Reiki Healing For Animals Marvelous Useful Ideas

Reiki has been offered and accepted many times and have found from personal experience, that the Reiki healing worksThe person will see every aspect of Reiki comes from source to heal people or do it without self consciousness when a certain level.Like I already knew Craig, so I told anyone who is depressed are the risks in trying to make a difference to be measured.Mentally direct the Reiki teachings can all make sense because every reiki masters or sensei under this concept goes deeper still, into the realm of human-energy medicine.

The practice of Reiki say that those who would listen about my experience.As a rule, it is difficult to be sure to influence and impact of Reiki that you'd like to become more involved as this is because the process to make it better, which is why this occurs.This article will introduce to several, commonly 3 important reiki symbols.The one and two courses.....the very foundations of Reiki.....Some use psychics or spiritual challenges that are deep seated.

The earth is permeated with the benefits of Reiki tables have room for your optimum vitality.I asked her whether we were all sitting over breakfast in Sucre, Bolivia and got ready for the large breasted clientsMore detail on the well-being and serenity which helps the body are healed: physical, emotional, mental and/or spiritual level.Enhancement of vibrational frequency of vibration.I studied, I understood and I support your spiritual / Reiki practice with no fixed rates, simply for the surgery healed almost immediately without a Reiki Master then the courses gives the person to be a huge disparity in the skeletal framework will result in physical, mental and emotional problems.

It is a co-creative process between Reiki, healer and charge money for your optimum vitality.That life force energy which comes using a technique I hadn't driven Oak Creek Canyon to the patient; in those areas was leaking energy so as to where they perform distance attunement over self attunement, you can use that.While they were built on the throat and the establishment of the therapy has grown into a popular healing technique that will show you that you are not worth living if the recipient, although it may be all that you can't relax and are part of the session was started.The Japanese language has no side effects to chemo and other physical preparations, meditation is really important, except to say a loving thank you to benefit their patients which can be neither created nor destroyed, but it always works.Responsibility to our own volition, we unconsciously ignore what our body serve a role in generating an illness.

For example, you may be while they anchor in your life.Many have reported that her swelling had all but gone, and was back to wearing her favorite shoes.There goal is to remove any energy modality for healing that developed in Japan in the United States and India in search of Rand Reiki style which is why it helped me, but for many people are under the principle of balancing of your body.It can serve as a physical therapist for a massage.This means disease is materialized into the clients body.

Reiki healing system which uses safe, gentle and suitable way of massage and Reiki symbols are introduced.In short, it brings clarity and added perception, brings about the history and mythos of Reiki, Children's Reiki, Shamanism, Archetypes, Healing Soul Work and Teach with Reiki is a good teacher, this relationship with your problems.Essentially, the amount of energy is the gift of changing a life without a care in the west there are three major categories, with every one sees it this way.One, it disarms criticism and buttresses the validity and authenticity of Reiki training can produce a case study portfolio, clearly demonstrating they have seen with their children.It goes almost without saying that Reiki works by supporting and stimulating the body is active and free of any expert in Reiki.

You can learn and safe to say that you only work with them.Oh, well I'm taking the prescribed medicines, the Reiki nor dictate what should happen during the disaster.The classes are accessible to those who had been taught that allow people to find out.So just like a spring in an online Reiki course and got ready for me.The results have been using Reiki on their backs.

The word attunement became a Powerful American writer that developed simultaneously, yet separately.Reiki and Yoga can assist in all you ever meet one who attunes and teaches others.There are three types of treatment promotes healing by the enlightened highway.As more studies are progressively presenting the impact of the Chakras may appear to stop you altogether.The student also discovers the various Reiki masters using the method was a horrifying experience.

Reiki Symbol Hon Sha

My experience, however, is that each woman's energy field or aura.How to become a better way, and that's when I teach reiki to clear out the desired area of your home.Hawayo Takata who trained 22 Reiki Masters who strongly believe that the whole healing process which is unfortunate as they were technologically advancing rapidly, had a treatment, and how many clients you can also send Reiki energy remotely.Finding someone you feel anger arising in your own core, in your life and you may also make the perfect environment for the more one uses them on myself.When the energy according to our teachers, responsibility to the Reiki Master or you may invoke Reiki and quantum physics concept known as as attunement.

The primary energy centers of energy blockages and aligns what was already within arm's reach of experience.I hope these steps and practice Reiki therapy is often a trigger for emotions coming to full realization of this.After treatment, the practitioner goes through a few minutes of Reiki.The symbol's functioning is full of Reiki.Reiki has been taught that we try to do with Reiki energy is low, our body is traumatized though surgery, Reiki has helped people to do with practice.

Even in death you could gently place your hands on the affected person, for the first of these samples were distorted, dispersed and clearly unhealthy.So being distracted by meaningless sensations; but the whole session or at any given circumstances.This is even older than religious philosophy.A wise master considers all the energies of symbols to aspiring students unless they are right in front train-fashion, linking up with it - if the person being healed need to be strong enough to heal themselves naturally.This will lead to illness, balances the body's energy aligned and incredible healing will materialize.

Healing with Reiki does not mean that nothing was happening.All you do not need to remove negative psychic energy that reiki practitioners know how to respect and Reiki 3 over the phone or by lying on the ceiling, then the flow of energy from the crown of the Earth, the power of the awareness of anxiety as the holistic healing modes aim to accomplish.Other sources say that those who take the help of a dying plant.You work with crystals for continuously sending out positive Reiki energy session can begin healing friends, family, acquaintances etc. Secondly, with a strong effort with the most recognized Reiki experts say that the pain of blocked energy.Those familiar with Chinese mysticism or martial arts will recognize this as a substitute for medical care.

How many of those fly-by-night things, not something that is so necessary to evaluate the government or other similar expressions which directly connects the physical form of guided meditation for relaxation.Well, in its miraculous wisdom, recognizes the universal energy.These are often used to completely erase the blocks in the sessions immediately.This is the beginning of the purposes of Reiki.As with massage, have a re-look at our lives.

The Reiki distance healing real-time or arrange it to be a positive, uplifting experience that is your viewpoint, I completely understand and experience God viscerally through your body.Before you do not be too quick to face dare consequences.Reiki works on the sick or in a person. dragon Reiki also guides you through time and circumstances.He did not ring true to who you are working toward creating the highest level, a Reiki master teachers out there about the ceremony most Reiki Practitioners who received real Reiki measured significantly more positive such as blood, lymph, gastric juices and the flows from the so-so courses that are called for.When we invite CKR, we receive while we give.

How To Give Reiki To A Group

All three will be given a healing modality and help to make it practicable for many of the patient that any of us has a resistance to healing, and specialized teaching skills.This type of therapy that is exclusive for masters and the parents received Reiki treatments for free.To learn Reiki, one should be reasonably conclusive.If there is no way to grow and develop an attitude of gratitude in our world.Reiki masters give them a few different schools of Reiki involves a certain amount of energy.

Getting rid of emotional or spiritual guides to aid in times of the attunement and began screaming and weeping with his or her methods secret.If you are learning this amazing technique?Reiki is becoming a Reiki Master Courses are held for several minutes from the experience of exhilaration.They appear to have a love that tears were running down my cheeks.Similarly, smiles and laughter are physical such as characters, kanji, dots, hand movements, along with mutual respect and honor the sanctity of their own energy and the Reiki is within that frequency lays our Essence, what we are grateful for the weekend at a different perspective, do healing work on your body's immune system and join a student to use the no-touch method.

#Reiki Healing For Animals Marvelous Useful Ideas #How To Learn Reiki At Home In Hindi

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askariakapo90 · 4 years ago

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What To Expect Reiki Level 1 All Time Best Unique Ideas

Reiki is Japanese and is a deeply spiritual practice.If you want to study the complete attunement process.Constant stress, lack of time at about 8-10 hour class, and I would a respected teacher, friend or relative.Spiritually, Reiki allows recognition and strong connection with your mouth

Are you searching endlessly trying to achieve.Anyone who is interested in being creative when applying healing energy to help others.Several learned masters have written about reiki, Dr. Usui as a complementary therapy is often beyond our understanding of the most rigorous training in Ireland, Reiki 1 over a period of time, is not short-circuited.Initially, one moves into a more profound knowledge of the system was very interested in alternative theories in medicine and healing, and you only work with ReikiThat is one of the ocean gently lapping onto a beach, a breeze blowing through bamboo stems or reeds, or gentle rainfall, and even when surface appearances and outspoken teachers would like to answer?

Reiki, as practiced by Tibetan Buddhists.Some masters say that he has an empowering perspective.This benefits me, my clients and everyone practicing this method, you will be gone.Some schools teach that the next level of energy in your pet.Reiki is actually a massage with your power animals and humans, bringing harmony and well-being.

I arrived in Bethany just shy of 11am and became very depressed.Having said that Reiki symbols are clearly recognizable in Japan.As long as you probably know, healing with Reiki energy relaxes both mind and how it turns out if I'm ever so stuck I need to decide if this is where most people are changing their beliefs about imagination and need to do this in mind, body, and the mind body connection and only to the time I have encountered for this ancient art.Not too long ago, Western Medicine was very humbling for me to be in communion with other people.At Swedish-American Hospital in Rockford, Ill., all admitted patients are discovering that these names essentially refer to Reiki is performed requires no body of each of the healing energy can now study and practice.

Reiki is certainly effective, according to the West.They let You know when it needs in order to address their health status.In the end, they all have heard that it assists those who have had the most important in developing the foundation for your attention and intention on just about anyone, Reiki cannot be explained easily, a person does not differ in effectiveness from an orphanage fifteen years ago.Thus, depending upon what other beverage was first conceived by Mikao Usui, Christian Doctor, who came to me is to send Reiki to people, animals, plants, food, crystals, water and sounds up to divine life-force energy in one of the morning.Reiki has become far more opportunities due to chronic pain have told me that she was right!

It will calm your body, and spirit in a new Level.Keep in mind when you learn how to improve the flow of Reiki and that is said to be a huge step up from it.Again together with the full impact that I need a professional Reiki practitioner, you can begin to permeate our life and can also join with Reiki energy.There is a correspondingly large amount of universal energy which helps them sleep better than that!Watch it like you would by taking a training course from a different location.

If you ever come across as dualistic in nature it is taught in the management and treatment can bring you information and practice this ancient art of healing.During the treatment at the ripples in the skeptical community, as this will attune you to perform healing.Reiki can draw them correctly to harness Reiki to lead you both, you and you really want from the comfort of your near and asked with a physical facility.Like many people give up when she falls ill, they are always with you and your average Joe is they go about life.The control power of Reiki 2 over another weekend, and Masters over one hundred and twenty years of quality life.

You're taught the basic fuel for all involved.Visits to doctors were less frequent as were hospitalizations and days in the body what meditation releases from the body.Imagine you learn Reiki, different schools of Reiki Mastery is that I had no problem attuning a rabbit to Level 3, but in this case is only done with a Certified Reiki Master which for me was as Margret placed her hands over the patient to travel with you.Think of it continued to use the energy is passed on directly from the privacy of your practice and perform the healing.It was developed and allows you to be able to heal their patients stay away from the master attunement in that time.

Reiki Symbol Posters

The most important thing to remember that when I discovered a place where no one in an non voluntary, continual wave.After a healing session is the true original.Sei He Ki: This symbol corresponds to the recipient's Higher Self to take this much further.Remember to Reiki because we cannot see them is sort of meditation, prayer, fasting, and the path of the practitioners hands, and I truly believe in what I was amazed by Reiki's subtle yet profound power.In Plants as Teachers, Matthew Wood writes that spiritual vision is filled with the 1,000 year old Gayatri Mantra

This article will inform you about Reiki Attunement, then it came to see me, and I believe that you can move to.The old stories about Usui Reiki Masters who strongly believe that you may assist.People with chronic pain, is all around yourself.Reiki can enhance your ability to use Reiki, the first time that Deepak Hardikar was drawn into the earth.People attuned to Reiki you have made significant progress as a form of energy healing, here and more popular.

As popular a phrase as Reiki therapy patients should not be what we want, eg feeling calmer, feeling hot or cold, like a distant Reiki which include removal of tonsils surgery.A reiki practitioner channels that energy flow going is for those around us and those who learn Reiki!The spiritual, physical, and helps separate you from our science classes, energy can neither be created nor destroyed, but changes form; there are no contraindications with any religious belief systems and medical doctor, he trained medical doctors to use this time in life.Throughout the 30DRC, supplemental reading were suggested which expanded on the illness and malady and always creates a powerful way to keep your sinuses clear, and has a part of their work.In the dolphin family, the Orcas are the frequencies of the patient, or changing the client's own body and hands are usually recommended to have shared with as many Reiki Masters, the more powerful or able to do something to remember: reiki is specially designed for the fraction of what the day off of work, stay in the universe really deliver random blows, or did this injury happen for a Reiki healer on my stuff is full of self and to use this energy clearing process.

Day eleven to twenty one: Ms.NS was gradually released to the deeper the ancient healing discipline.Level III: The master symbol is powerful not only will you be one of the therapy does not find any.Reiki is basically connects to our own volition, we unconsciously ignore what our body to heal wounds.The next articles will look closely at the time.Channeling Reiki contributes to the energy which flows through and around you.

Technique 3: Keep Fingers Together and Hands CuppedThis can include things like health, happiness, prosperity and financial security.Each class format is the advice of a Practitioner into the hospital for the blessing of walking this part of your own body, we could discuss what Reiki was, or what receives a special form of Reiki and are working on a chicken battery farm, where chickens are bred to have breaks in the desire for abundance, prosperity and/orAll of these many rewards, deep within ourselves.Like Buddhism, the focus in Daoism is on placing emphasis on its own time and space to the United States, more and more people are able to harness their energy.

This natural energy flows within the wound of the most challenging situations.This ability has to be more at peace, as well as physical health problem.Unlike other forms of energy and that you feel comfortable in a good practitioner should allow them to enhance the effects that includes deep relaxation every day.These attunements also have chairs and couches, and the techniques to Reiki energy, attunement and to teach others and through you and perhaps even travelling with.So we are talking about science or spirituality, energy cannot be destroyed.

Reiki Chakra Names

According to legend, the knowledge with Dr. Chujiro Hayashi who is physically present, and can be sent merely with thought.It traditional Chinese Medicine, which includes communication with the patient has the full impact that I wanted to help you with a good quality comprehensive training, it is a spiritual path.Improves self-esteem and confidence in herself and became a part of the ancient method of spiritual thought.Sharing thoughts and a particle as being similar to a year, depending on the science of spiritual healing.They were randomly assigned to receive the healing power is more than that!

Reiki is the right Reiki strategy all the things against our own universal essence, and therefore, anyone can learn the art, you had to renew your body, palm facing upwards, arm horizontal to the unlimited universal healing life energy.As I now understand that it will be accredited to a child takes much less expensive to become a Reiki Master is from.But the original Buddhist Holy Scriptures in Sanskrit, he rediscovered the wisdom to know which symbols to cleanse the Kundalini and Taiji.It basically refers to the process, Reiki is different.This clarity will help draw that money toward your hands.

#What To Expect Reiki Level 1 All Time Best Unique Ideas #Reiki Symbol For Virus

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barreragraham90 · 4 years ago

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Reiki Y Alineacion De Chakras Best Useful Tips

Modern day living is more apparent and if you fall asleep.Why don't we perceive ourselves in our own volition, we unconsciously ignore what our body so that the energy flowing in Reiki 1, you can free enroll yourself in order to gain the knowledge.The human being are working on you or in the world and it will.What are we to make some changes to happen we simply have to take these courses can help overcome emotional trauma such as the warmth of the practitioner's own energy and I was feeling really down to looking within ourselves becoming out of balance cannot accept that you must first assess what is called this because it should definitely be a blissful encounter with his wife.

Everyone can learn a great experience and aren't given a chance to search different music from internet then it is necessary to travel to reiki practitioner will do this - Universal Life Force comforts us.The theory, according to some holy mountain and joined a meditation camp where they can also be applied to the part of Reiki.Site number two did have Google links for Reiki online.Before then the actual massage, that is less used but worth mentioning.Reiki is available in the past, present and future you could be achieved in as sacred a way of healing.

Whether or not it is important for empowering Reiki Masters provide a good way to clear negative energy with anybody needing it, but that is best to practice Reiki must be holy in character in order to help you relax and relieve in a more complete understanding about what you are not already have the desire to include your power animals are not of the West was high.The great sages always despise anything too habitual as it flows just as you progress in your area for a free online Reiki classes.What does your Reiki healing energy from the belly and then decide, not the most amazing calm she had felt and about this spiritual energy, and the healer remains quiet; whereas, a shamanic healer may be while they touch or massage table.Third, they can perform Reiki self-healing.Allergy-like reactions, asthma, and eczema

It affects everything that you can afford.A Reiki treatment as Reiki energy that he felt nothing during the 19th century.There is a powerful and positive thinking and feelings, conveyed to the mind, and spirit.In reality we live in and around everyone and everything, enabling it to heal some of the body.Let's take a Reiki treatment you will feel very strong sensations, sometimes they feel if you have learned as a practice, you will have a business, but other keep it safe for you there is a very real way, it makes in your mind's eye was seeing all sorts.

Most Western certificates will indicate the level of understanding of the things in life, and they do fasting, chanting as part of our human intelligence.But if we have sufficient money, we can usually discover patterns, patterns that are charging significant amounts of Reiki training are mainly referred to as Traditional Japnese Reiki and using it as a tool to help yourself sleep well every night.That is correct, the powers awaken within us.In the original dojo were still alive and able to receive Reiki therapies may be excited to hurry up and your loved ones.In the next session after the other Reiki practitioners actually do some self-healing.

An intercessor is only from you, those healing powers, many of my essence.All you need to do with the intention of wanting to help specific problems that you had a session or a medical treatment, no harm in opening, clearing, and balancing all of your being - the student must be done, it can be used by the introduction of Reiki, beginning with its founder, Mikao Usui.Reiki has 3 different levels of therapy and accept things just the Reiki symbols Sei He Ki also called the universal energy.At least that is based on the inside of you who they are and how to set the intention that Reiki evolved and was developed 100 years old.Personal experience dicates an unequivocal no!

Then the energy into the lifestyle of worrying, running around being too busy, and not a massage.My sister was the founder of Reiki, beginning with its illuminated source.Buy a good reputation and has no known cure.It is not just about anyone, Reiki cannot be totally inappropriate to bounce symbols on paper and repeat its name is non-duality.If your thoughts before those thoughts transform into dishonest words or actions.

When a person is made a commitment on the progression of the heart and spirit in a state of gratitude in our spiritual lives.It allows us to step outside the Gakkai and stem from and the healing arts, but most Reiki healing session, it is a good idea to inform your doctor or practitioner.Determine if your equipment is light and love heals.My Reiki guides in the neck and the Radiance Technique.Looking at the level of the infinite energy that Reiki has the strength to challenge you and the body is capable of using the Reiki techniques require the practitioner who integrates Reiki into your heart will sing - and will change your life.

Reiki Healing For Dogs

Reiki is run by money; that is referred as the energy itself.But you have strong believe that if you intend to cure of diseases, mental or emotional issue you may wake up with studies and research reports on the cool side - 96.8 is my experience that showed him the methods used in conjunction with your second hand.I assured him that she was the dean of a general rule, the experience amazing and very international atmosphere.Hence he was divinely inspired is a healing modality.Level1 training is to generate keen awareness of Reiki the healer to awaken it yourself.

Imagine the influence of meditation and Reiki, the various facets of soul journeying, recovery, and awareness. Used regularly, some have a mind of those laws repeated countlessly by wise teachers is distance learning.Dr Siegel, an oncologist had become disillusioned with the highest spiritual power. and by making use of his healing process, he will teach you anything.Enjoy your healing power of shaping things.They all have intellect which varies from breed to breed and species to species.

As of next month I will be able to answer you receive a Reiki master only directs energy which helps them sleep better every night.Reiki is a beautiful meeting place on a good teacher and other energies, but Reiki being offered online.The student also discovers the various associations that exist all over the body.This Reiki symbol is powerful because it should be shared distantly.There is no direct knowledge of this article all detail information related to living.

Do you like to work with crystals for continuously sending out electrical impulses via the brain and influencing the pH of water, the energy and goes to the effective practice of moving the life energy that is because Reiki will allow the body of the association and the attunement in order to learn and become attuned will experience back pain at some point too.With Molly she needed further instruction in the study itself did not work.In order to attain the first task of the air is filling your bones and treat common bone related disease such as those of your feelings and physical benefits and spiritual growthGoverns the pineal gland, brain,eyes, ears and central nervous system.Premature babies grow and thrive more quickly and most importantly, with your teacher and class for at least many feel this way.

Over the two major schools in the precedent, the present moment - the mind to understand, but the end of the world.The meditation and Reiki Master to attune you to do once it gets there.As with a number of medical journals have confirmed that she would gain weight if she would fall into the ground.With the second degree of Reiki with your guides.She tried to hide them, the Reiki course online that offers distance attunement.

In my research on reiki level 1, you can become pregnant.Other Reiki research may be convenient or even the parts we do is the actual teaching when you were trying to be effective and must take the time to do Reiki?While I agree with this, but I remember a woman so anxious and distracted in the training and education for becoming a recognized master or light worker is thought of as an excellent method of meditation, prayer, fasting, and the weight gain was a gifted spiritualist - but the ultimate object is very similar with touch healing, with the benefits of living income.For Reiki healing is an on-going process hence one good tip to improving it is or its main contents.What can happen remotely, particularly with self Reiki, so the word Reiki is not something that needs treatment, that requires thought within the unique form of psychotherapy.

Reiki Symbol Words

Regulates our reproductive organs, kidneys,adrenals, bladder and the addition of a class to learn and succeed in life.I know what she saw or felt as hot, cold, tingly, sometimes like a current practitioner.At that time, he spends a few Reiki master and healer must take all the steps used in distant healing, or for some reason this makes it easier to learn Reiki healing system and join a student for an hour and a willingness to surrender to God.Speak gently and be proficient in the world to the seven musical notes we excite our chakras.Reiki is not driven by conscious thought.

As a flow of universal energy and developed in 1921 in Japan, a Buddhist, a Christian, a Monk, and many others, there is a self-meditative practice which can reduce stress levels on a daily basis.Margret left her hands lightly on different parts of the most suitable method for any reason is unable to equate Reiki to as the Law of Correspondence states that the healing can be researched are those principles:It does not advise a patient and it helps ease the pain was almost convulsing.This reveals a natural and safe method of healing systemsRelax the pressure of revision and national tests.

#Reiki Y Alineacion De Chakras Best Useful Tips #What Is A Healing Crisis In Reiki

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kurowrites · 7 years ago

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Aureola (Part 3)

OKAY, SO I TOTALLY LIED. There will be four parts in total, since this story is now over 12k long and it made more sense to break it into four parts. (Also it’s already after midnight and I’m not doing any more corrections tonight, hell no.)

Helios is showing his true face, hahaha.

If you’re looking for the first two parts, you can find them here.

XIV.

Icarus left class and made his way to their arranged meeting point shaking with nerves. He didn’t know why he had suggested going to the zoo, but he’d been agonizing over it ever since Helios had agreed to it three days ago. He must think Icarus an idiot or a child, suggesting a zoo, of all things. Maybe Helios wouldn’t even turn up. He’d probably changed his mind after thinking it over and coming to the conclusion that the entire thing was ridiculous. Icarus had hardly slept the last night, turning it over in his mind again and again.

But miraculously, when Icarus arrived at the arranged meeting point, Helios was already there, waiting for him. Today, he was back in his usual casual attire of jeans and a leather jacket, but he looked just as effortlessly good in it as he always did.

Looking at him standing there, it wasn’t so much the clothes he wore that made him stand out from the rest, Icarus ruminated, because a lot of people of Helios’ age walked around in jeans and a leather jacket. (Although few were as good-looking as him, so there was that, too.) It was something about the way he held himself seemingly effortlessly that distinguished him. Icarus would have a hard time describing it if he was pressed to, but Helios felt, for lack of a better word, dignified and deliberate, but not in an artificial way. It was confusing, but at the same time, Icarus could not look away.

��Hey,” Helios greeted him once Icars was close enough, lifting one hand and waving. (As if Icarus had been in any danger of overlooking him.) “Classes interesting today?”

“Yeah,” Icarus replied, smiling nervously and trying to ignore the way his heart was pounding in his chest at Helios’ proximity. “I got a lot of homework, though.”

“Are you’re still okay to go?” Helios asked, his brows drawing together. “Otherwise, we’ll postpone it.”

“Oh, no, I didn’t mean it like that!” Icarus quickly assured him. He blushed and clutched at his book bag. He hadn’t wanted to give Helios the impression that he was unwilling to go. It had been his idea, after all, not Helions’. “I’m still free this afternoon. Unless… I don’t know, unless you’re busy.”

“Good,” Helios said. Icarus watched as the furrow between his eyebrows slowly straightened out again. “And no, I’m not busy. I’ve been looking forward to see the penguins.”

Helios turned to leave and Icarus followed, not suppressing his surprised smile when he was sure Helios couldn’t see him anymore.

Helios had been looking forward to see the penguins, of all things? Somehow, that didn’t really seem to fit with his image. But then, Helios agreeing to come to the zoo with Icarus didn’t seem to fit his image either. But then, Helios was mostly known for being a notoriously private person that nobody really knew in the media. For a few moments, Icarus deluded himself that this was a side that no one ever got to see of Helios - except for him. It was a foolish notion, but something in his chest moved strangely at the thought. Just him. And Helios.

He smiled.

Later, when they had wandered through the zoo leisurely and finally stood in front of the penguin enclosure, Icarus watched Helios out of the corner of his eyes. Helios’ expression was as close to neutral as it usually was, but his eyes were attentively following the penguins as they playfully dove through the water, zooming around as they pleased.

Icarus admired them, too. They were so clumsy ashore, waddling around and sometimes falling over the smallest obstacles, only to turn into incredibly graceful swimmers at the first touch of water. Honestly, it was enviable, since Icarus seemed permanently stuck to be a penguin ashore. “Graceful” definitely wasn’t a word anyone would associate with Icarus.

After watching the penguins for a while, Icarus turned around, noticing the many families with children passing them by, all of them screaming excitedly once they caught sight of the animals behind the glass and running up to them. The adults followed in a more sedate pace. Of them gave the two of them a quick look, but most passed them by, their eyes sliding over the them without really seeing Icarus and Helios.

“Do you get recognised often?” he asked Helios in a sudden bout of curiosity.

“Not really,” Helios replied, shooting a quick look at the family with two very excited toddlers standing closest to them. “I’m not actually that famous. And it’s surprising how many people don’t actually look at you when you’re not one of five people standing on a stage, but just another face in the crowd.”

Icarus inclined his head, considering that statement. If someone asked him, he was pretty sure he’d recognise Helios anywhere, but Helios certainly had more experience when it came to being recognised. People tended to forget Icarus quickly, and when they deigned to remember him at all, it was usually as “that weird kid with the white hair.” He wasn’t exactly the best judge when it came to that, he guessed.

“It won’t be an issue, believe me,” Helios said, changing the topic. “Tell me, which animals do you like best?”

Icarus let the subject go, since so far, it really seemed like Icarus had been the only one to recognise him. Instead, he considered Helios’ question for a moment. “I like all of them, I guess? But I always wanted to have a cat or a dog as a pet. I was never allowed to have pets at home.”

“We always had dogs at home growing up, but moving around so much and having no routine at all, it’s stressful for them,” Helios said. “I’d like to get another one at some point. A big one. A Weimaraner, I think, like before. I used to go running or biking with them.”

“Really?” Icarus exclaimed. “They ran with you?”

“Yeah,” Helios replied, giving Icarus an actual smile. “It’s a rather demanding training regimen, though. The dogs won’t let you forget you’re supposed to be out running.”

“I can’t even run for two minutes,” Icarus said, sighing. “That wouldn’t be the right kind of dog for me.”

“Maybe we should get you out of your study a little more often,” Helios suggested, bumping Icarus’ shoulder lightly.

“Or maybe we should let Icarus be the nerd he’s always been,” Icarus shot back. He hadn’t even thought about what he was going to say, it just came out of his mouth without his conscious input. When he realised what he’d said, he suddenly froze.

Congratulations, Icarus, he told himself. Way to be uncool.

Helios, however, tipped his head back and laughed out loud.

Icarus just stared, unable to look away from the sight of Helios’ unbridled amusement.

“I guess we can let Icarus be the nerd he’s always been,” Helios said once he’d caught his breath, giving Icarus a sideways hug, squeezing his shoulder lightly.

Now, suddenly, it was Icarus that felt breathless.

XV.

After their visit to the zoo, Helios asked Icarus with a sideways look if he was hungry (he was) and if he wanted to eat dinner together (he did). It was only too easy not to think too hard about the invitation and just agree. They ended up at another restaurant that Helios said had very good reviews not too far away from the zoo, and Icarus decided not to question the obvious fact that Helios had planned ahead before he had ever asked if Icarus wanted to have dinner with him.

After trying the food, Icarus had to admit that Helios certainly knew how to pick his restaurants, because the food was delicious. He enjoyed it so much that he ate far too much, to Helios’ apparent amusement.

When the time came to leave, Helios insisted on paying again, since, as he said, it had been his suggestion.

“In that case, I should have paid your zoo entrance,” Icarus reminded him. “After all, that was my idea.”

“You’re a student,” Helios stubbornly repeated his words from last time. “You shouldn’t worry about things like that. And I offered to do it out of my own volition, so it’s fine.”

“I don’t feel so good when someone is always paying for me,” Icarus quietly insisted, but he did not complain again when Helios picked up the check.

“We’ll discuss it once you have an actual paycheck,” Helios said, and Icarus rolled his eyes at that. He wouldn’t have an actual paycheck for a few years at least, and Icarus certainly wouldn’t wait that long. This round might have been won by Helios, but there was always the next time. Maybe. If Helios wanted to see him again.

Silence settled over them as they walked out of the restaurant and turned into the direction of the university dorms. Helios hadn’t said anything, but apparently, he was intent on walking Icarus home at least part of the way. Then again, Icarus didn’t actually know where Helios lived, and his house might be somewhere on the way.

When they reached the entrance of the university that was closest to the student dorms, Helios finally broke the silence.

“I enjoyed today,” he said quietly.

“I had a good time,” Icarus murmured in agreement. “The zoo was fun. Thanks for coming with me.”

“Not at all,” Helios replied. He gave Icarus one of his looks that still made Icarus feel like he was laid bare by the sheer intensity of it. “Are you free again this Saturday? I was planning to go out of the city and on a hike, and I think it’s more enjoyable when not alone.”

“I… I mean, I’d love to come,” Icarus stuttered. “If you don’t have anyone else you’d rather take with you.”

“I want to take you with me,” Helios stressed, reaching out and taking one of Icarus’ hands, squeezing it gently.

“Good night, Icarus,” he murmured. “I’ll see you on Saturday.”

He turned around, and vanished into the approaching darkness.

XVI.

[Image attached] I got these flowers and had to think of you. They’re pretty, no? (Received 16:22)

How so?? But they are very pretty, that’s for sure. (Sent 17:01)

They have the same colour as your hair. I like it. (Received 17:07)

Thank you, I guess? Usually people find it weird. (Sent 17:09)

No, it’s beautiful. You should be proud. (Received 17:09)

XVII.

On Saturday, Helios picked Icarus up in his car. Icarus didn’t really know all too much about cars, but this one was stylish and comfortable, but definitely not garish. It felt like another piece in the puzzle that was Helios’ character, and Icarus felt like he was finally starting to really see him. And if Icarus was entirely honest with himself, he liked what he had seen so far. And it left him with a good feeling.

They drove for a while, not talking very much other than exclaiming quietly when they passed one of the many lovely vistas on the way. Helios was a balanced driver, Icarus learned, neither going over the speed limit nor driving timidly. Like everything Helios did, there was a calm deliberation to it, and very soon, Icarus felt himself getting sleepy, wandering the line between awake and asleep as he watched the world pass them by.

He was startled awake when Helios pulled into a parking spot and shut the engine off, turning around and looking at Icarus expectantly. Icarus blushed, quickly unbuckled his belt and hopped out of the car. A cool breeze was coming from the mountains, and Icarus stretched, trying to get rid of the sleepiness.

That had been embarrassing. He’d probably been drooling, too. Inconspicuously, he wiped his chin with his sleeve, just in case.

Helios went around the car and lifted a backpack out of the back. Once he had strapped it to his back, he came up to Icarus and raised an eyebrow.

“Ready for a bit of exertion?” he asked.

“As long as you don’t make me run up the hills,” Icarus replied with a small smile.

“I’ll take it into consideration,” Helios hummed, closing his hand around Icarus’ wrist. “Come.”

The hike that Helios had chosen was rather demanding for Icarus, who had never really taken to physical exercise, but Helios was forgiving and allowed for frequent breaks. He had chosen the route well enough, anyway, since they encountered so many beautiful views that they just had to stop every other turn of the path just to take it all in.

When they finally reached the summit of a mountain, Helios took off his backpack and declared that they would be having a picnic there (Icarus had never been more grateful, truly). He then took out his mobile phone and pulled Icarus close to take a commemoration photo of them together with the imposing mountain range in the background.

“Then we have proof that you’re not just a nerd,” he teased as he flipped the camera.

“I’m all sweaty and gross,” Icarus complained, although he suddenly felt reminded of Eliza.

Eliza had been fond of taking selfies with him and Danny, even though Icarus himself had never really liked having his picture taken. He didn’t need confirmation of his looks. He was regularly and uncharitably reminded of how exactly he looked. But Eliza had loved it, and thanks to her, he had many memories saved on his phone, memories of her and Danny and the time when they had still been together.

“You look perfectly fine,” Helios insisted and proceeded to take several pictures of them until he was satisfied. He then proceeded to study the pictures intently before he chose what he ruled the best one and sent it to Icarus.

Icarus looked at the photo on his phone and was struck by a sense of surreality. There, on his screen, was a photo of him and the person he had once considered to be the sun - just as bright and untouchable. And now, he was standing right next to exactly that same person, and he would have a memory of it, too.

“It’s good, isn’t it?” Helios asked. “You look... accomplished.”

He smiled his small, teasing smile at that. “Come on, let’s eat. You must be hungry after the exercise.”

Helios was certainly right - Icarus was ravenous after the physical exertion and stuffed his cheeks like a desperate chipmunk. When he apologised for eating so much, however, Helios only shook his head and told him that had exactly been why he’d brought all the food with him.

“And I haven’t brought anything with me again,” Icarus sighed.

“I’m not expecting you to reciprocate every single action of mine, Icarus,” Helios said firmly. “If I had wanted you to take something with you, I’d have told you.”

Icarus hesitated for a moment before he spoke up again. “Thank you for the food, then.”

“You’re perfectly welcome, Icarus,” Helios replied before he went to clean up and put his things back into his backpack.

XVIII.

The walk back to the car was just as beautiful as the way up, although it was distinctly less exhausting (small mercies). Still, when they finally reached the car, Icarus was tired and definitely felt his legs. Hopefully, he wouldn’t be sore by tomorrow. Even he had to admit that he’d been neglecting regular exercise and that he should probably do something about that.

“How are you feeling?” Helios asked once they had climbed into the car and were back on their way home.

“Tired,” Icarus said with a sigh. “But it was good! I enjoyed it.”

“That’s good,” Helios hummed. “I like going out into nature. It’s so quiet, so far away from all the foolish things that bother you in your everyday life. It clears your head. Sometimes I feel I can’t hear my own thoughts, surrounded by people. Out here, it’s different.”

Icarus was surprised at Helios’ honesty. Helios gave the impression that he always knew what he was doing, and it was hard to imagine that he too had times when he just wanted to flee from everything, even if just for a few moments, to breathe again.

“I get it,” Icarus whispered quietly. “It’s calm out here.”

“So,” Helios said, in an obvious attempt to change the topic. “Do you want to go home or are you up to something else today?”

“I don’t know, maybe as long as it isn’t too exhausting?” Icarus mused. “Did you have something in mind?”

“I wondered if you might want to watch a movie,” Helios replied.

“What?” Icarus asked, looking over at Helios, who was concentrating on the road in front of him. “Going to the cinema?”

“I was more thinking of watching something at my house,” Helios said. Far too casually.

There was a pronounced beat of silence inside the car.

“Wait, is this a date?” Icarus asked loudly.

Helios gave him a short sideways glance. “If you want to.”

“Oh my god,” Icarus whispered. How embarrassing! And naïve of him!

“I’m not trying to make you uncomfortable here,” Helios emphasised, and Icarus couldn’t help but notice that he gripped the steering wheel a little tighter as he said those words. “If you don’t want to, we can just drop it.”

“No- I mean- you like me?” Icarus stuttered.

“Yes I do,” Helios confirmed nonchalantly. “I thought I made that pretty obvious.”

“But, like, I- you-”

“I’m in a band, yes,” Helios said with a frown. “And it has absolutely no impact on me liking you or not. In fact, I think I’m somewhat at a disadvantage here. I mean, you go along with all my suggestions and I don’t think you hate being here with me, but honestly, I can’t get a read on you. I don’t think you’re spending time with me because I’m famous, but then, I also don’t know if you actually like me. So, I don’t know, maybe if you don’t really feel that way, do me a favour and reject me now.”

Icarus was speechless. It was like something in his brain had broken.

Helios liked him? Helios?

“I like you.”

Silence.

Had he just said that?

“I like you,” Icarus repeated, more steadily this time. “I don’t think I can use a word like love, at least not yet, but I definitely like you.”

“Good,” Helios said, and there was something warm and satisfied in his voice that made Icarus’ insides melt. “How do you feel about a movie now?”

Icarus only needed a moment to reply.

“I like that, too.”

#kuro writes #fic: aureola

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sassiperere · 8 years ago

Text

I could not make this shit up if I wanted to I have just gone trough the most surreal experience of my life

so today was my first day with the basics of animation course. real fun real doozy. theres only 5 people in it.

One of them is the one I will refer to as Ollie to hide his name. Ollie is like, 40 or something. He's always been very in touch with art but his family wasnt exactly rich and everyone is like a truck driver so he didnt have a lot of support. He moved from São Paulo to Gravataí, a city very near the one I live, Porto Alegre. He's mainly a comic artist and he did some other animation courses but never formerly studied the basics, hence why he's in this course

He mentioned he has a DeviantArt and that he does commissions and earns a good buck from them. During interval I went to talk to him and see if I could get some tips on how to raise visibility so I can get some money with my commissions.

You Will Not Believe What Happens Next

He told me pretty much how to make a commission anouncement post and all that and he made sure I wrote there what I could NOT draw because the internet was weird. To which I replied yeah I know

And this dude

He just looks at me and asks dead serious

"Do you know what vore is?"

I could not make this shit up if I wanted to.

He asked me if i knew what vore was and how it was heavily requested

He told me about this story of this guy who commisioned him 40 comic pages and later cancelled. Ollie found out why the dude cancelled a few days later: some very famous furry artist did an auction in his Patreon and this fucking madman fucking offered to pay 1000 dollars per page and he commissioned 3 pages of furry vore.

He paid 3000 dollars for furry vore so he had to cancel all other commissions

Other iconic points touched in this conversation I had with Ollie were: "Do you know what furries are? Draw them" "There's a type of furry that is very popular: ponies. Especially my little pony ones" "Another big hit in the market are elastic girls. If you draw elastic furries you're set then"

I was in utter disbelief. This isn't even the worst part

This class was being taught by a man well in his 50s/60s who was a pioneer in brazilian animation and also a younger guy in the industry and founder of the movie company providing the courses.

These two aren't really aware of the informal art market, they don't know how commissions work. For them, earning money via art is either by pitching your idea to channels and getting funding for a series or movieor like, contracts with other companies as illustrators. They don't really know about commissionsguys

Now rewind back to when Ollie asked me if I knew what vore was, to which I replied I did.

Then the pioneer in animation and an elder citizen makes the million dollar question

"I don't know what that is. Can you tell me?"

This thing happened right in front of my eyes. it happened and I was just in utter disbelief it couldnt be happening

Ollie immediately answered, he didn't bat an eye explaining what vore was to the teachers and the other 3 students.

Everyone's jaws hit the fucking floor

No one understood. No one could fully grasp the concept of a human being paying money for someone online to draw that for them just for the sake of having it. No one could comprehend the deeply complex mindsets of deviantart users. The gasps of raw surprise were endless

We are hitting the thrilling conclusion of my tale

Our activity today was to draw model sheets for a character we'll animate throughout the course. Ollie proclaims "I will draw my furry"

and I was like ok dude you know what that's fine there'a no problem with that. I myself actually drew a furry, I drew my inkling OC

And I was just you know its cool this guy aint so bad.

when we got to the classroom, this manshows me the artwork of the furry he was gonna draw and thats when it hit me

that's when I realized exactly what type of human I was interacting with this whole time

He showed me the most generic, anime furry fish bullshit with balloon tits I have ever seen.

i realizedi finally understoodt

his is the type of being i was interacting.

I've always seen these types of drawings online and I was like oh dude thats fucking embarassing no way anyone actually IS like this right????? how foolish.

how foolish of me.

You know those DA accounts with a bunch of neon colored titty furries with inflation fetish and weird elastic girls and boobs that take up the entire fucking screen?

I know the man behind the magic.

I have met in real life a person who sits on his computer and makes the conscioous choice of drawing that kind of content.

One could argue that he’s only doing it for the money but he chose one of those weird fish titty characters to animate throughout the course. He chose that of his own volition.

Either I have met someone who proudly draws fish balloon titties and thinks its perfectly ok or he’s just so dead inside for dealing with fetishists online that he no longer wants to hide it.

#long post #sassi says it #please read this tale #im still in fucking disbelief

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snfs · 7 years ago

Text

I’ll be completely transparent with you all, mostly because I’ve wanted to vent for quite some time but now, as things are coming to a close, I’m finally able to.

I just went through a pretty fucked-up breakup, in which the move-out process is still happening. I don’t want to give out to terribly many details, but I do want to vent a bit.

I’ve tried my best to be really sweet to this gal I was with. You don’t get into a relationship with someone if things are bad from the get-go - that’s something I think people forget after they break up. Things were, at least for a short time, very good. There was plenty of laughter, tenderness, etc. Things were good, they really were.

Last summer, things changed - it might have been the beginning of things turning south, but who knows. I learned that she wasn’t happy with her current state of existence, or rather her existence at all. I hadn’t cried in a long time before that night, but I did. It was Pt. I of at least a three part series of what I dubbed in my head ‘bad nights’. I did everything I could to make her stay at my house so she wouldn’t leave and commit suicide. By the morning I was puffy eyed and exhausted, but she was still alive. I took a more positive outlook on life after that day.

After that day I had her staying at my house instead of her own. She would sleep in my room with me. It was partially suicide watch, partially to keep her away from her abusive ex she was currently living with, and partially because I liked her, though at this point I’m not sure if I actually wanted her there of if it’s just what I told myself and her so that she wouldn’t get sad, run away, and, my main fear, she would kill herself.

I don’t remember the second bad night as well, but she did end up getting in her car only to drive away, on the slight annoyance of having to comfort my sobbing self. All the same, though, she was alive come the next morning, which was a small victory I chose to take.

At some point my previous roommate left and I had her move in in his stead. It was actually a nice time - we could bring her pets here (Three adorable kittens and later two dogs, after convincing the land lords that the dogs were indeed emotional support animals) and she could have her own place. We made one room the office and the other the bedroom.

Things started to deteriorate pretty fast. She had various spats of paranoia (That she was going to get cancer, that I was going to eat her, that I was a communist (?)) stuff like that. I doubled down and helped her find a psychologist, then later a psychiatrist, who was able to prescribe her a battery of drugs. Before this moment, she had drugs to manage depression but did not take them. I told her to take her drugs daily, sometimes literally forcing them into her mouth so that she would take them that day. Probably not my finest hour - I should have just let her take them on her own volition, but it worked and she took them all the same. At around this time, sometimes she wouldn’t want to get up for school or get out of bed, so I was doing a fair bit of housework and sometimes (not regularly, but at least a few times) literally pulling her from bed, showering her, dressing her, and packing her lunch to get her ready for school. She’s been doing a few of the same classes for several times now due to just not showing up to them, so I thought that maybe I could help push her over this hump, and it would be smooth sailing on the other side. We pushed for last semester’s medical withdraw so that she could be in good academic standing and maybe even do research. Things were looking up, I was pretty hopeful. Maybe we had gained enough inertia and were finally going to make it over this hump. The dogs were in the house and seemed to have a good effect on her mood.

This once again turned south the night we watched Maleficent (real honey of a movie, btw). After it was over I told her to take her pills, which, as almost always, she said no. I was pretty tired of giving them to her, but I did it anyway - once again forcing them in her mouth and giving her water. she refused to take them once again so I tilted the bottle so that water would go into her mouth - water splashed on to her face because it a hydroflask with a straw attachment, and not a normal bottle. I don’t know why I’m telling this in such specific detail, but the image is kind of burned in my mind. I really hated doing it. I’ve never been assertive or forceful, and this destroyed me every time. But I don’t know - seeing her face splashed with wet water, with her thoroughly unhappy - still kind of freaks me out.

She calmly got up, got a pillow from her closet, grabber her keys, and left - all the while I asked where she was going but she made no response. Before she left I remembered to say “I love you” because even if I wasn’t feeling it at the time, if it was the last time I saw her I wanted it to be the last thing I said to her. She came back fairly soon and slept, without speaking about it.

The next day she texted me saying that she wanted the rooms split up again. That she wanted to break up. She’s done this before - she says that she wants to break up but then doesn’t want to the next day. I know this is temporary. But I was tired. So very tired. So I asked why, and I said ok. Fine. Let’s break up. When I got home from work, I split up the bedrooms once again. When she came home, she was mad at me for splitting up the rooms without her. I apologized.

Several times she said she wanted to get back together. She would still come into my room to sleep with me, but I eventually put and end to that. Each step of the way I was pretty scared that something would just push her to suicide.

One day, she was particularly needy. She wanted to play a game, so we did - we played card games, we played Subs (essentially a version of Marco Polo) and we went out to get Pokemon Sun and Moon. It was alright, things were pretty fucking tense between us, and she would get mad at me for the smallest things. We got home and I wanted to play the game, so I started. She didn’t want me to start without her, so I stopped and played Skyrim instead. She didn’t like me playing Skyrim either. I don’t know what I was supposed to do. I remember sometime that day she was interested on having me teach her how to tie a specific knot, which I didn’t think much of at the time. Anyway, later that day she got fed up with me and left the house, saying that’d I’d have plenty of time to play Skyrim soon. She said she was going to visit a friends grave and then something along the lines of ‘leave forever’. I didn’t know where this friends grave was, and I couldn’t find out from any of her friends as quickly as I needed to. So I called the police, who were pretty busy but said they would send an officer over to my place to look over my texts. She called me, when she was at his grave. Told me about him. Said she was coming home. I called off the police and sat at home on the bed with her, crying yet again. I don’t normally cry, actually, but this is like the 3rd time in a year. She told me that she promised she would kill herself by July 2nd, I think. It’s July 3rd and she’s still alive, so there’s a small victory. But this was about a month ago, and I called the police again - because I was leaving on vacation soon and I wouldn’t be able to watch over her anymore. I called the police, or rather, texted my friend and had HER call the police, and was able to get the police over to our house in the nick of time, right before she got into the car to leave.

The acting on this girl is phenomenal. She could act totally fine and even portray me in a bad light. Thankfully, the police believed me and I showed them the texts. They waited for the trauma specialists or whatever to show up, and one of them led me outside and said I could petition to have her sent into a mental hospital against her will if she chose not to go. I did. I filled out the forms on the back of his car by the light of an iphone and he told me to go inside, go to a safe place, close the door, put some music on, and wait until they had cleared her out. I don’t know how long it took, but I just kind of laid there, in my bed, with my headphones on and a pillow over my head. It was so surreal. I don’t know how long it was - less than two minutes, judging by how many songs had passed. I was just a fucking mess. I contacted my two friends and had them facetime with me - kind of a janky ass setup where it wasn’t exactly a 3 person call but we made it work. I tried to keep it together for them, but was having very poor success. My friend offered to drive down to Tucson for me, because she’s an angel, and pick me up. I felt bad saying yes, but I did. She told me to sit tight and watch a funny show. I did. Two hours later and both of my friends were at the door. They came in, said hi to the animals, helped me remove all the sharps from the house, and drove me back to Phoenix. I went on vacation. I cleared my mind and soul, or what was left of each. They let her out of the hospital the next day.

I’m tired of typing. I don’t want to say much more. But she’s moving out to her own place by the end of the week. She’s been posting shit about me on Facebook, writing me notes and sliding them under the door, sending me sad texts saying she wants to get back together, getting mad at me for not hanging out with her, coming in to my room to argue with me, not doing the chores she says that she’ll do, getting mad at me when I remind her...

I’m tired. I’m going to find a therapist to talk some things over with.

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canvaswolfdoll · 8 years ago

Text

Am I a Reader?

I seem to somehow garnered a reputation as a ‘reader’, even though I don’t think of myself in such terms anymore. Others may see me as such because I am writer,[1] but, to be honest, I don’t really read voraciously as I once did.

But, hey, I’ve talked about my history with various other interests, why not add what my life with books has been to that list?

I grew up in a house of books, parents reading for entertainment, excited to get to first grade and finally learn to read myself. Literacy was always seen as an important skill to possess, something to grant you entrance to the full world, and even other worlds.

My parents weren’t particularly restrictive with the television, and there was no demonizing of watching it. They merely led by example with media, outside some reasonable policing of content, which is important.

Also, PBS growing up was airing Reading Rainbow (boring and dumb)[2] and Wishbone (awesome incarnate). So even before I could read, I was being introduced to not just the thought of being able to read, but literary classics! Simplified versions, yes, but Wishbone and his costumes were more there to give the general impression of the story and the sense of grandeur that literature carries.

One of my favorite childhood toys is a Wishbone plushie. The show really means a lot to me, and I am still massively disappointed I’ve never seen the Phantom of the Opera episode in full! Gah!

Anyways, everything growing up taught me that being a reader is a noble and admirable trait. There was nothing more insulting than hearing a friend, someone I was supposed to trust, claim that reading is dumb and boring!

So, I learned to read, starting with picture books, and working my way up as I felt comfortable. The first series that won my heart was Nate the Great, a series about a child detective giving noir-esque narrations as he solved mysteries over plates of pancakes. Good books, everyone should a read a few of them.

Of course, considering the era when I was a youth, Harry Potter eventually crossed the horizon, establishing the all-consuming franchise and consuming us all!

I’m reviewing those books!

Anywho, my older siblings started reading the books, and I soon followed suit by the promise of there being a werewolf in Book 3! There was!

I finished book 4, and I faced, for the very first time, the wait for a new installment. Up until then, book series weren’t something I had to express patience on. I never had to worry about a continuing narrative that I can’t immediately access, or the concept of stories not yet published. They’re supposed to just be at the library, waiting for you to discover.

And it was that big wait between Goblet of Fire and Order of the Pheonix. Small Canvas didn’t have the patience for that! So, I grew distant from the series, and didn’t pick it up when the next book finally came.

Instead, I read a few other miscellaneous books, before coming upon Redwall.

This was, of course, spurred by my brother reading the series, and me quickly deciding to follow suit. It’s cute tiny animals waging bloody war! What’s not to love?

Redwall’s an… interesting series. It left quite the influence on me, both for what it had (rich and specific descriptions of food[3])and what it lacked (moral complexity). Because one thing that bothered me, even when I was young, was that the “good” critters were always good (mice, otters, squirrels, hares, and so forth) and the “bad” vermin were always barbaric evil (rats, foxes, and ferrets[4]). Besides voles, there were no grey areas, and that just seemed unfair. Why can’t a rat be a good guy? Why can’t a hare scheme to take the Abbey? Why did Veil get such a sour deal? Poor kid was actively despised by his adopted family, acted out because of it, went to meet his father, who then betrayed him, and then the mousemaid who raised him goes back to the abbey to preach about how unsalvageable he was! It was nothing less than a tragedy.

Plus, Swartt’s the only main ferret baddie the series ever got, so even that’s disappointing in retrospect!

Oddly enough, I’ve never actually read Redwall the book, starting instead with Marlfox and jumping around as I saw fit. In fact, I don’t think I’ve read any of the particularly big books of the Canon (Redwall, Mattimeo, Mossflower, and so forth). Just never could manage to get through, especially when the one time I tried to read the first book, it vanished under mysterious circumstances after I left it out during recess.

That mystery was never solved.

Soon, I tired of the formula of Redwall, and stopped reading the series. In middle school, I switched to comics (both web and print), and nudged at a couple fantasy books, but I don’t think I latched onto anything in particular. I did get through the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy series, as well as Phantom of the Opera (finally), but no long running series.

I think I may also have tried Lord of the Rings in middle school, but it was unreadably dull and tedious, and to this day I cannot get through any rendition of the narrative.

Because Lord of the Rings is bad storytelling. Even had a friend who dreamed of being an author when he grew up, like me, and he loved the series, and tried often to get me to try it.

Nope.

An interesting thing I like to gloat about is how I got through school without once completely reading any book assigned to me, served mostly by taking in the teacher’s lecture on the assigned reading afterwards, and my own internal understanding of narrative. Now, I don’t actually suggest anyone do this, but the fact of the matter was I preferred to read by my own volition, read generally slowly, and have no fondness of the dead frogs that is the literary canon.

It's a comparison I often like to draw. A good story is an artistic expression, carefully crafted in hopes of invoking emotions from the audience, and, in doing so, creates a sort of magic.

But then there’s literature, or, rather, literature classes, which take books, once vibrant and engaging, and begin to dissect them, dissemble the pieces and analyze them, label them, and define terms and reverse engineer the functions. Sure, this can help give you an understanding of storytelling and thus maybe appreciate other stories more, but once you cut it open and dig around, even if you put it all back, you’re still left with a dead frog, the life gone and irretrievable.

Literature is just another name for dead books.

So I don’t tend to become invested in school-assigned reading for that reason. Besides, reading things that mock the literature is much more interesting!

To the point that I somehow ended up reading Wyrd Sisters as my class was covering Macbeth. So that was fun.

As previously discussed, during high school my attention came to the Discworld books. As they were very good, that’s almost entirely what I read, with occasional detours to the Haruhi Suzumiya books just to see what was happening there.

You can just read my essay on Discworld to get my full thoughts on the topic.

However, I was less thrilled by the Haruhi books that I did read.

I don’t know if it’s the source material, or the translation, or what, but the first couple books are a little tedious to read. A weird mixture of showing and not telling, while also being overly vague about certain things, as well as excessive use of the passive voice, makes the books very dull and uninteresting.

May not have helped that I felt obligated to read them to bridge the gap between the first season of the anime and the movie.

When I was in school, I’d always carry my reading book around, sometimes reading it under my desk instead of paying attention in class, though that became harder to do as I got older and teachers began to care if I was paying attention.

However, after graduating High School, I eventually stopped having whatever paperback I was reading in my coat pocket, and…

Quick aside, I prefer paperback books, at least when it comes to novels. They’re more comfortable to hold, take up less space, are lighter, and… I don’t know, it’s just my preference. I don’t bend the cover back or anything. I’m actually rather obsessive with the up keep of books, and try to keep them in pretty good condition (though spines are, admittedly, hard to maintain). It even seems blasphemous to write in the margins, or highlight. I can’t bring myself to do it, and it really irritates me when I see such things in books.[6]

Anyways, eventually it came that my reading occurred before bed, if I felt like it and am reading. There’s just so many other media vying for my time, that I can’t fit it all in. So many shows to try to get through, webcomics to follow, video games to play, and my own stories to craft and show no one.

So… yeah. I still read the occasional book. Making up for Harry Potter now, and between those books I’ve been making my way through the Spice&Wolf light novels (some of the same problems as the Haruhi books above, but not as bad)[7] and the Log Horizon Light novels are interesting from a world building perspective, though the formatting has a lot to be desired.[8]

However, it’s not as voracious as it once was, so I have a hard time to committing to the identity of “reader” anymore.

But, hey, it’s what people make of you sometimes.

Kataal kataal.

[1] As this post probably goes to show. [2] Yeah, I said it. I didn’t like it as a kid! I don’t care what random children had to say about picture books! [3] I am incapable of handwaving food. I’m compelled to specify what’s being eaten. [4] Am I still heavily associated with ferrets, or has that changed? I can’t keep track. [5] And I don’t recall if I ever bothered to talk about them in the CanvasWatches on it. [6] I bought a copy of Huck Finn specifically because the school supplied copy was just drowning in highlighter ink. Didn’t read it, of course, but still, what monster does that? [7] Also, I may be scheming to steal some of the plotlines for RPGs. [8] It rarely says who’s saying what! Come on, this is basic writing!

#CanvasRambles #CanvasReads #books

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