#not an ‘oh shit’ this time but a simple ‘oh’

[444sturns]

┈﹒ ꒰ ours. ꒱ ﹐ ‏࿐ chratt x reader – part two. — find part one here. w/c: 2.7k

‎┈﹒ ꒰ warning: contains explicit content; oral (f!receiving), unprotected p in v (do not.) threesomes (no incest, no weird shit), sub/dom dynamics. chris is a tease, but a cute one. filthy. proceed with caution. ꒱ ﹐ ‏࿐

the text came in late – or early, depending on how you looked at it. 4:26 AM.

matt: booked you a flight. ticket is in your email, btw. see you soon, sweetheart.

you blinked tiredly at your phone, eyes just barely adjusting to the brightness and your brain hardly registering what you’d read. it took you a moment, but you read it again. and again, and before you knew it, you were packing. your heart hammered relentlessly in your chest from pure adrenaline.

chris’ text rolled in shortly after, a simple “can’t wait to see you later.” it all sank in.

the waiting game was finally over and you were relieved, but oh, you knew you were in for a long night once they got ahold of you.

the hotel door had barely even clicked shut before matt had your back pressed against it, his mouth greedy, hands tugging at the bottom of your hoodie– his hoodie. matt had barely managed to drop his bag before he had you pinned against the thick wooden door, the force of it punching the breath right out of your lungs. “missed you,” you whimpered into his mouth, surprised that you’d even managed to get a word out. “missed you more.” matt muttered breathlessly, voice rough and whispered before his lips were on yours again. he kissed you hard, like it could get back all the weeks apart with tongue and teeth alone. your hands gripped at his arms to steady yourself, already dizzy from the adrenaline.

chris hovered just behind him, wide-eyed and starved like he couldn’t wait to get his hands on you. he couldn’t wait. 

“get over here.” matt muttered over his shoulder, and chris moved quickly.

chris took over the very second matt pulled away from you, as if you needed another reason to feel any dizzier than you already were. his hand cupped your jaw so gently, it nearly broke your heart; his touch was always a stark contrast to matt’s. chris was soft where matt was rough. his lips found yours, softer, slower, while his hands trailed carefully down your sides like he was trying to re-learn every inch of you.

matt watched for a few seconds longer, chest rising and falling quickly before he finally spoke up, shattering the silence surrounding you. “m’gonna shower,” he started, his eyes finding chris’, “get her ready for me. take your time with her.” 

chris’ breath caught in the back of his throat, pupils blown wide. there was no way matt was trusting him to be alone with you. you blinked up at matt, then chris, heat pooling between your thighs and equally in your cheeks. matt just grinned and turned on his heels, heading out of the room and leaving you two alone. 

chris caught your chin in his hand again, touch still gentle, thumbing over your bottom lip. “guess he trusts me after all.” he chuckled, “let me take care of you, pretty girl.” 

you nodded, suddenly breathless all over again. he guided you over to the bed as the sound of the shower running roared behind the bathroom door. chris moved carefully like you’d break if he touched you a little too hard, but you knew better– he’d gotten more confident since that first time, but he was still chris. gentle, attentive, needy as ever.

he helped you out of matt’s hoodie slowly, crystal blue eyes raking down your body like it was the first time he’d ever seen it; like he couldn’t believe you were real. “you’re so fuckin’ pretty,” he murmured, gently pushing you back against the bed. the comforter was cold against your bare back, a relief to your feverishly hot skin. chris kissed his way down your body with gentle precision– lips against your collarbone, over your chest, pausing to mouth over your nipples until you whined. that sound made him throb, it was one he’d missed for weeks. he grinned proudly against your skin, his fingertips inching down your sides, over your hips, finally hooking beneath the hem of your panties and tugging them down your legs in one fell swoop. 

when he finally settled between your legs, it was like he’d been starving for weeks. he moaned at the first taste of you, tongue rolling slow and deep between your slick folds. you cried out, already over-sensitive from the weeks of built-up tension and desperation, your hips twitching under his touch. chris didn’t rush– he did exactly as matt said, he was going to take his time with you.

he licked you open, tongue working skillfully and slowly, groaning against you and fingers spreading you apart while he worked you over like he’d vanish without it– if he would have had to wait any longer, he would have.

“please–” you whimpered, hips bucking up to meet the warmth of his tongue, “chris, please–” 

he hummed, the octave vibrating against you and making you squirm. he slid a hand up, palm pressing flat against your lower stomach to hold you down, “so impatient, baby.” he groaned, lips shiny and slick with you, “you missed this, huh?” 

you nodded, eyes welling with tears, squirming with each deliberate stroke and swirl of his tongue against your sensitive clit. “yes! yes– missed this, missed you, so much.” you all but babbled, hazy with the knot that was painfully close to snapping within you. chris chuckled lowly, lips pulled into a smug smirk that resembled matt’s more than you cared to admit, “missed this needy little cunt, too. look at her, cryin’ for me.” 

chris kept you teetering on that edge for what felt like forever, lapping and sucking, two fingers easing inside of you, urging you closer and closer. every time your breath hitched and your back arched, even giving him the slightest sign that you were about to cum, he slowed down again, pulled back, letting you cool down just enough to build you back up all over again. it drove you insane, he did it on purpose.

you were crying by the time the shower had shut off, chest heaving rapidly, hands grasping at the sheets. “chris– fuck, please, need to–” 

the bathroom door creaked open, and you let out a pitiful cry. matt stepped out, towel hanging low and loose on his hips, hair wet and dripping at the ends. he took one look at your flushed face and smirked. 

“she cryin’ already?” matt asked, pushing a hand through his wet hair and shaking his fingers through it.

chris looked up, eyes glassy and lips shiny, “she’s close.”

matt chuckled lowly, “good.” the towel dropped where he stood, his cock already hard, heavy between his legs. “move. give her to me.” 

chris sat back on his heels, taking a breath swiping his tongue across his lips before moving out of matt’s way. matt was quick to take chris’ place, wedging himself in between your trembling legs. he reached forward, gripping your jaw to direct your attention up to his face. “thought you could tease us for weeks on end and not get fucked dumb the second we got our hands on you?” he murmured.

you shook your head pathetically, eyes glassy, “no, i– matt–” 

he cut your words off with a kiss, deep and hungry, tongue rolling past your plush lips as he lined himself up at your weeping entrance. the head of his cock slid through your slick folds and pushed inside in one slow, smooth thrust, making you sob. 

“shh, baby,” chris soothed sweetly, kissing your temple. he’d crawled up beside you, keeping your face close to his, grounding you. “doin’ so good for him, such a good girl, huh?”

matt didn’t give you much time to adjust– you’d hardly needed it with how soaked you already were. he started thrusting hard, deep strokes, groaning with each rock of his hips. his cock dragged against your walls, clenching around him just right. “so– fuck, so good, matt,” you cried out again, clawing at the sheets. chris noticed your desperate hands and took one into his own, lacing his fingers in between yours and letting you grip as tight as you needed.

“so tight,” matt hissed, “fuck, you’re perfect. missed this pussy so fuckin’ much.” 

chris continued the whispered praises, lips working slow and soft across your jaw while matt fucked you hard enough to make the bed creak. 

“let her cum, man, she deserves it.” chris murmured to matt, and you whined in response. “please..” you choked out, lifting your pleading gaze up to matt, and it fucking broke him. 

“cum for me. for us, c’mon.” matt growled, hips still pushing deep strokes inside of you, and that was all it took. you came with a broken wail, shaking as matt fucked you through it. he chased his own release with a low grunts, pulling out of you to finish across your stomach, painting thick, white ropes of cum against your skin. chris nearly fainted at the sight of you like this; messy, wrecked and panting. 

matt’s chest heaved from the intense high and low of his orgasm, collapsing on the other side of you with a satisfied sigh, while chris kept up the soothing. he planted a few more gentle kisses to your jaw, muttering softly, “might just leave you like this. y’look pretty all messy like this, doll.” his voice was soft, his words anything but. 

matt wiped a hand down his face, looking over at both of you all smug and fond, “no point in cleaning her up yet. we’re not done. not even close.” 

you swallowed thickly, your eyes hazy and tired behind your closed eyelids. they were going to ruin you. over and over again.

you barely had time to catch your breath before matt rolled to his side, to face you. his hand wrapped around the column of your throat; not to squeeze, just to touch, to keep you grounded. he kissed you again, slower this time. 

chris remained at your other side, brushing damp hair away from your face, his eyes soft but dark with lust. “you okay, sweet girl?” his voice was quiet, careful.

you nodded, lips parted, still dizzy and dumbed out from the intense orgasm that matt had just fucked out of you. “mhm,” you hummed, “just need a minute.” 

matt grinned and looked up at chris, “still hard?” 

chris huffed out a laugh, completely taken back by matt’s question as if it weren’t the most obvious thing in the world. “you fuckin’ kidding me, dude?” he was. throbbing, and it hurt. 

matt gave your throat a gentle squeeze before pulling away and sliding off the bed. “then you’re up.” he nodded his head toward you, still splayed and fucked out on the sheets. “don’t make her wait.” 

chris hesitated for a split second, always being as cautious as possible like you might break or like matt might change his mind. but then he saw the way you looked up at him, glassy-eyed and wanting, and his resolve completely melted. “c’mere.” chris murmured, nudging your thighs apart again with his knee and positioning himself in between them, “need to feel you.” 

you reached for him, pulling him into a lazy kiss while he fumbled with his belt. his fingers were unsteady, betraying just how needy and desperate he was. you reached down to help without saying a word, shoving his jeans down his legs. his boxers followed suit and his cock finally spring free, hard and flushed.  

chris groaned as his fingers wrapped around the base of his length, lining himself up, “been thinkin’ ‘bout this for weeks,” he whispered against your lips, “every fuckin’ night.” 

he pushed into you slowly, letting you feel every single inch. the stretch was different from matt— not better or worse, just his— and the way he filled you made your eyes roll into the back of your head. chris was quiet when he first started moving, slow at first, watching your face with a kind of focus that made your heart race. every little flutter of your lashes, every sound you made, he responded to with a soft moan or a whispered, “that’s it, pretty girl. doing so fuckin’ good for me.” 

he gripped your leg, lifting to hook it around his waist, the subtle change allowing him to drive himself deeper, making you cry out all over again. “there it is.” chris groaned, a smug grin playing on his lips as he watched your face closely; your eyebrows knitted, jaw gone slack, whimpering so prettily. 

“holy fuck, chris…” you cried, and he instantly hushed you with a kiss. “i’ve got you.” he breathed, his mouth trailing away from your lips, to your jaw, your neck, “so fuckin’ good for me, aren’t you? for both of us, huh? our good girl.” 

matt had moved to the head of the bed, darkened eyes locked onto you and his brother, watching like it was his favorite show and he didn’t want to miss a second of it. “she squeezes around you when you talk to her like that.” matt finally spoke up, voice rough, “she loves the sweet shit.” 

chris chuckled lowly, hips stuttering into a faster rhythm that left you dizzy, “is that right? you like it when i talk you through it, huh?” he muttered, head ducking down to nudge his nose against your own. “filthy little thing.” he added, his voice dripping with a newfound dominance that shocked you and excited you all the same. 

you whimpered pathetically, tears finally slipping from your eyes and rolling down your cheeks again. it was overwhelming, too much, yet not enough. chris noticed. he always did. he angled his hips just right, the head of his cock driving into your sweet spot and you choked on a sob, digging your nails into his shoulders and making him hiss. 

“right there?” he asked, his voice ragged. 

“yes, yes, fuck, right there.” you gasped, nodding frantically. matt couldn’t help himself anymore– he needed to be closer, needed to touch you, needed to talk you through it with chris. he moved himself down to your side, cupping your face gently in his palms to brush his thumbs across your tear-stained cheeks, “you’ve got one more in you for chris, don’t you, sweetheart?” he coo’ed, eyes zeroed in on your face. 

“think so.” you stuttered.

“wrong answer,” matt growled, leaning in closer, “you do. be a good girl and cum for him.” he commanded, and you knew better than to defy. 

chris reached in between your legs, his fingertips pressing against your clit to rub fast circles against you; he kept his rhythm steady, thrusts getting deeper and more urgent, “let go for me, pretty girl, fuck– wanna feel you.” he groaned, his own orgasm approaching. 

you came again with a desperate cry, your gummy walls gripping chris so tightly he nearly lost it himself. he buried his face in the crook of your neck, moaning shakily as he followed you over the edge. his hips sputtered as he spilled inside of you, coating your walls white. “jesus– fuck..” chris all but whimpered against your damp skin, earning a low chuckle from matt on your other side.

for a few long seconds, there was nothing but panting and the sound of the faint hum of the air conditioner on the wall. chris pulled out of you with a quiet hiss, leaving you dripping as he collapsed at your side, breathless. matt finally reached over for you again, pushing your sweat-damp hair out of your face. “you’re a fuckin’ dream, princess,” he started, voice gentle, “a filthy one, but a fuckin’ dream.” 

you took in a deep, shaky breath as you attempted to shift yourself a little, though each movement made you ache a little. chris clocked your movements and immediately slung an arm over your torso, keeping you still, “easy, doll. you know damn well you’re not walking unassisted for the rest of the night.” 

matt rolled his eyes teasingly, pushing himself to sit up on the bed. he quickly got himself dressed into a pair of clean boxers and sweats out of his suitcase before heading to grab a warm, damp cloth to get you cleaned up. when he returned, he was gentle with every touch, cleaning you with careful precision. “this’ll be good enough til’ you get some food in your stomach.” matt started, “we’ll order some food, get you in a nice warm bath, then maybe–” he paused, glancing up between you and chris with a grin, “we’ll go another round.”

chris snorted, half-laughing, half-terrified, “kid, you’ll kill her.”

matt shrugged, “she’d die happy.” and you, already melting against the sheets in your afterglow haze, couldn’t even argue.

© 444sturns ‘25

⨳ ᦒ author’s note: writing this was a journey. slow and painful. stay wet. -eden ᵎᵎ 𖥻

taglist! ￤ഒ·°,

@cherryystemm @zenithsturniolo @chrissbows @sturnsrecord @sturns-mermaid @ifwdominicfike @moond0llie @bambisturns @madie4sturns @that1fangirll @hannahsturniolo @daniycrs @courta13

[calebslittlecrow]

How To Assume

(stop being an overly anxious potato over manifesting)

Sometimes I see shifters asking “Oh, what should I do? Nothing is working :(“ and they get hit with the good ol “just assume” stamp and send on their way. And then, barely 10 steps later, they turn around and whisper “... the fuck do I even assume?”. Before I chew your ear off: assuming isn’t hard. Well, not really, but people tend to make it hard. We as humans just love acting like we need to turn ourselves into a pretzel every time we want something “big”. We actually assume every day - when we decide we suck, when we tell ourselves we’ll never shift anyway, when we confidently declare we are stuck in our 3D and shifting is just too good to be true and all those people in the reddit community saying it’s just astral projecting or deep lucid dreaming are right (what is even going on over there atm?). Guess what your 3D is doing with those assumptions? It grabs them, says “bet!” and starts running like it’s a race. Congrats ^-^ But hey, the good news: if you can assume all of that shit, you can also assume that you have shifted. Yeay! In the spirit of keeping it simple, I turned the way I see assuming into a neat little list. Enjoy, or not: 1. Just Decide That’s it. Thanks for coming to my TED talk, exit is to the right. Okay, it sounds suspiciously simple and I know some brains will twitch a bit right now with “That can’t be it”. But it is. You sit down, breathe and say “I have shifted”. No begging, no pleading, no howling at the moon. You just decide, and that is where a lot of people crumble already by pleading for it to happen instead of deciding it has happened. You don’t need an approval stamp, you are the CEO of your own reality, not the intern grabbing coffee. Act like it. Deciding isn’t hoping or praying, it’s simply knowing. No matter if shit catches up immediately, tomorrow or next week. Doesn’t matter, let go of the need for it to happen right now. 2. Stop checking You said you shifted and now you are still checking your reality every 2 seconds like a teenager waiting for a message from their crush. Stop it. You’re rereading your script, watching shifting TikTok like the answer to all your problems will jump at you, poking your subconscious like “are we there yet?”. That’s not assuming, that is panic dressed up as productivity (or something like that). You are basically saying “I don’t actually believe this is done and decided”. Cut it out. Just go live your life. Play some games, touch grass with two hands and one face (beware of bees), breathe some fresh air. Your desire won’t implode because you stopped choking it out and stopped micromanaging everything. Obsessing doesn’t equal manifesting. Just let it cook. 3. You commit or you quit Assuming means you have to kinda commit to it. You’re not almost there, or halfway shifted. You are there. You have shifted, no more ifs and whens and buts and any other kind of spiraling. Take five minutes out of your day, relax into that knowing (or deciding). Feel your DR bed, hear your DR friends be loud as fuck for no reason, smell the DR air. Let your imagination drown out this reality like unwanted background noise. Similar to the fake arguments you rehearsed in the shower. You never needed help with those, did ya? 4. Yell at your doubts Maybe do this one internally, unless you are really feeling bold today. Every time your doubts creep in and whisper “What if it is not real?”, you turn around, embrace your inner main character energy and yell back “Shut the fuck up Brenda (sorry to all the Brendas out there), get back into the backseat. You’re not driving, I am.” Your doubts don’t get a say in what you want. They are not invited. You think your DR self is out there wondering if they are real or not? No, they are living the life you are telling yourself is unreachable.

5. Feeling ready is overrated, just do it Stop waiting to feel ready and questioning if your script is perfect or not. Your brain will rarely send you the green light you think you need to go ahead. You will feel silly, you will feel delusional. And you might feel like a clown. Embrace it, be the clown. Insist on what you decided until your 3D gets nervous and bends over in existential fear. You don’t wait to feel certain, you decide you are certain. And then go and act like it’s done.

TL;DR (how dare you, but fine T-T) Assuming you have shifted is like assuming the sun will rise tomorrow. You don’t argue with your friend about it. You don’t beg the sun to rise again. You just know and walk with the confidence that it’s happened, and with shifting you do so because you said so. That’s it. Stop overthinking. Assume and now go, I need to do some drawing stuff.

[lambcultist]

꒰ ♱ ꒱ gf!ellie who was oddly secretive about her 'career' since your relationship began, and you never stopped to question why...┆ dark content. hitman!ellie x naive!reader. toxic relationship, manipulation, gaslighting, love bombing. she's literally a murderer, you have been warned + i'm rusty because i've been tired lately, but wanted to get this out because i kept thinking about it ♡ MINORS DNI ( 18+ )

"it's just a job, babe. it's that simple. you never told me you were coming home early, the fuck is up with that?"

you had arrived home with a headache to a near-silent house, not even a whisper, only the faucet running in the bathroom. once you followed the noise, you couldn't get a peep out before ellie spotted your look of horror in the mirror behind her. she cursed quietly and made a pathetic effort in hiding the array of obscene, bloody weapons on the counter from your view with her body, but it was too late.

there isn't any option. you must cooperate, or you will be forcing her hand to her gun, and the barrel to your head. and for her own sake, ellie is praying you will listen.

"it doesn't matter that i came home early, i— i shouldn't have to come home to this—"

"shut the fuck up, if you never came home, you wouldn't have seen me like this," ellie hisses. she keeps her back to you, sparing you nothing but a menacing glare through the mirror as she wipes down her revolver. "you could have prevented this so easily. could've texted, or called."

she yields a fucking weapon, perhaps you shouldn't shout or argue; it may cost your life. truthfully your mind finds it hard to comprehend this. sweet, lovely ellie, who has always been a little overprotective, but not in any questionable sense—until now, that is—she's a killer.

"i'm not the one at fault." you take steps back, speaking more to yourself than ellie by this point, who can't bear to listen to your panicking. "oh my god. oh my god. i have to call the—"

now, this catches her attention. she spins on her heel, hands flying to your wrists to bar you from exiting. "no, you don't call anyone. you don't tell anyone. don't be stupid, baby, god. you know what happens when you call the cops? they take me away from you. that's what happens. you want that? you want me gone?"

fat, hot tears pool in your eyes, spilling down your cheeks as you shake your head. your wrists are rigid, ellie's nails pressing into your flesh with a sickening burn. "no, no, just—"

"you'd fucking betray me like that? after everything i've done for you? i thought you'd be different."

"no!"

"then don't you dare turn me in," she spits. your vision is blurred and your brain foggy, but you can feel the callous look in her eyes. they are like daggers. "i do all of this for you. i do this so we can have a good life. and you'd really just... throw me to the wolves like that, huh?"

"no, no, i won't," you weep, frantically shaking your head now. how could you be so dumb, so selfish? ellie has opened up about her fear of abandonment enough times for you to be conscious of it. you should've remembered how this would hurt her. "i'm sorry ellie, i wasn't thinking."

"fucking hell," ellie mutters, letting go of you finally, critically surveying you up and down. your tears, your weary hiccups and sobs... you are easy enough now. "i'm not a murderer, babe. it's just a job. that's all there is to it."

"okay." she isn't satisfied with your lack of words now, but it is understandable.

"this job.. you know how much blood and sweat it takes? fuckin' look at me. this one didn't go down easy," ellie says. she talks, rambles, to fill the silence in the room. "this one fought. he hurt me. and i do this for us. to pay the bills, the rent, put food on the table, and to buy you whatever shit you want."

you nod along. she lifts her shirt to show you deep, purple marks she has earned, instructs you to watch her clean scratches and cuts she received, and then runs the shower.

"why did you come home?" ellie asks. she is milder now, throwing her black clothing to the ground piece by piece.

"i.. had a headache," you murmur between sniffles.

"why didn't you say that?" she scoffs, reaching for the hem of your sweater. "jesus, baby. could've been looking after you already. shower with me."

you flinch while ellie begins to undress you. she notices, of course, and gives you a warning glare.

"babe, don't be scared. i love you."

for a minute or two beneath the shower head, the water runs pink, the remaining evidence of her crime disappearing. her soapy hands run along your body firmly. her lips press against your forehead and her arms are pulling you in for a cuddle under the water. it should be warm, yet it feels so icy.

"i'm not a danger to you," ellie whispers, kissing your temple before she adds, "as long as you stay quiet."

🏷️ @abbysdollie @valeisaslut @eriiwaii @literallylautski @ellieshothousewife @piercedome @therealhexstrap @jinxedbambi @heyimrye @rhian88 @g4ys0n @yoosohh @marvelwomenarehot0 @l0veylace

[cosmousee]

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝓦𝓱𝓲𝓼𝓹𝓮𝓻𝓼 𝓕𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓢𝓹𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓽 😇💌

Hey everybody! I am back from yet another hiatus (I will stop doing that I swear).

Hope you all are doing well~

Today’s reading is on gentle whispers from spirit. Now it can be anyone, the universe, the spirits, the Gods, your ancestors, whatever you believe in. Just call upon them while choosing your pile and yeah~

Lets get on with the reading, and remember whatever doesn’t resonate, pass it on<3

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Dang, pile 1, it feels like you’ve been going through so much and for a while now. Like it feels like a never ending cycle of some shit which is always going on and you can’t catch a break.

You might feel you got a breather for one day and you feel that nice, we had a good day today and then your day ends up with something or the other happening and then you’re in that cycle all over again.

Feels so much like my past month, so, bestie, I really get you.

There’s so much, you might have been in constant fight or flight mode, having to put so much effort and time and your mind in order to do a task. And ofcourse life doesn’t let you do one task at a time, its constant multitasking and its not easy.

Having to source your own energy to sustain yourself every. Single. Day. oh my god. Even as I type this I can feel the tiredness, but still the zeal to get the work done, the fire in your hearts, that whatever happens you want to do the things you love. This might be a clash between many of your own passion projects, or you know just even life, that you find time to work on your art, your story, your side business and then also find time to do laundry.

Its been constant juggling, constant heartache, headache, you name it, for a while now.

The very first image spirit showed me was a fireplace. You know those ones you sit in front of during winters, sipping a cup of hot chocolate, or coffee or whatever.

Spirit wants you to realise that you’ve done enough, you’ve spent enough. Its time for you to take rest, take a breather. And chill for like a good few days. Of course hard work has its own place, but that does not mean that you’ll burn yourself out.

And if you feel that you know, you HAVE to toil away at the thing only then you’ll achieve things in life, my dear, please take a seat, and a blanket and your choice of drink (its fine if its alcohol because I totally get it–but responsible consumption).

This past week, spirit got real with me and went, “You’re not supposed to struggle so much, you’re not supposed to be uncomfortable so much.” They were teaching me that when things get difficult, sometimes it’s best to just remove yourself from that situation and go to a better place. Its as simple as saying ‘I deserve better’ and then just yeet yourself from there. I know its easier said than done, and I've fought with spirit alot on this, and I still do. Because even I feel that you gotta go past the uncomfortable to grow.

But sometimes the discomfort is there just to teach you that there is comfort if you just ask for it, if you just look for it. If you just say that you deserve to live comfortably it’ll be there. You’ll just have to take that decision, make that call, ask for help and you shall receive it. And you’ll receive it in such intensity and you'll be so dumbfounded that why were you suffering so much.

I yap alot and I dont stop here you might have to read so many things and just–yeah. On the ending note I just want to say that spirit really wants you to take care of yourself, pushing yourself to achieve things is one thing, but spirit doesn’t want you to live in extremely uncomfortable situations. You’re their literal baby and I know they can be difficult sometimes, to teach you things, but they always look out for you too. (I can feel my guides being like ‘told you so’, doesn’t change the fact that y’all get on my nerves so much)

Wish you well pile 1 <3

That’s all I have for you today! Thank you so much for reading🎀🌻Please let me know what resonated I love hearing from y'all<3

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Pile 2

Pile 2, spirit is so so so proud of you, your journey, how far you’ve come.

They are so happy and so proud of the things you’ve done. And it feels like its literally everything, it can literally just be the way you’ve done your hair and they’re like “You’re doing amazing sweetie!” and they have their camera on and they’re recording you.

I mean in my head it feels like, you woke up, you are so tired, but you still made your bed before you leave for the day, and SPIRIT IS LIKE HOLY SHIT MY BABY MADE THEIR BED with literal tears in their eyes.

They see you, they acknowledge you and they are just in awe of you and what ever you are doing. It’s literally like you don’t have to be Alexander The Great or you know, do some out of the universe type of shit to get them to be proud of you.

Its just unconditional love and support. You defended yourself against someone who was being mean to you, and you felt a little bad about it?

I can literally see spirit, with their arms crossed, and they are nodding like “Exactly my child! This is exactly what you should do!”.

So spirit is with you, every, single, step of the way, remember that.

Also, they mean to tell you that there is greater happiness, greater contentment waiting for you if you open your heart to it.

You might as well just be happy where you are, and spirit has no problem with it. They’re just letting you know, that if you want and you need, just open your heart and there’s gonna be a whole new world for you.

(see I asked for gentle whispers and this might be the gentle part, and in reality they might be pushing the fuck out of you to go follow that path and drop signs left, right and centre. So I thought of putting this out there)

Im saying this because I had this imagery of a person just putting their hand on their heart and closing their eyes and just beams of strings emerge out of their heart. Your heart will tell you where to go if you listen to it and if you want it.

Spirit is being real as well, once you open your heart and many opportunities pour in and it’ll be hectic, it’ll be draining, it can feel as if you’ve been working the whole day and you just come back and you just sleep. Like you lay on the bed and in a second you’re out cold and this repeats every day. Because when you do things your heart desires it takes SO MUCH of your energy.

Okay so this can be sort of a confirmation for some of y’all as well who have listened to their heart and are on the path. Because you’re getting so tired you might feel that you’ve done something wrong.

You haven’t.

This will go on for a while till it settles. You might feel a bit sad that you don’t have much energy to put elsewhere or whatever. But it isn’t for long. Your spiritual team is always there cheering you on and being so very proud of you. Keep going and do well~ I am also so very proud of you cuties<3

Wish you well pile 2 <3

That’s all I have for you today! Thank you so much for reading🎀🌻Please let me know what resonated I love hearing from y'all<3

⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡⋆ ˚｡

Pile 3

Dear pile 3, how long has it been since you’ve taken a slow, refreshing walk? When was the last time you’ve actually felt your thoughts were slow, when you could actually think instead of your thoughts going a hundred miles per hour?

Hold your horses guys.

Spirit is telling you to be gentle with yourselves, to “chill” as they just said. They’re telling you that life is not going anywhere, you may feel that just because. You may feel that because you’re trying to see where you are in reference to others.

But look at yourself, just at yourself, and your life. You’re at the right place my sweetheart, be in no hurry. There’s no rush. If you stop and you feel, you’ll get the cool breeze on your face, gently passing through the strands of your hair. You’ll smell the fresh grass, you’ll feel the cool air, the sun and you’ll be very content.

Give yourself a break. At least a short one.

I know realistically and practically you might have a proper job and you’ll be like “I HAVE A SPREADSHEET DUE TONIGHT AND YOU’RE TELLING ME TO CHILL?!”

And honestly, I get you, because even I have so many things due tomorrow…and I haven’t even started and its like 11:51pm at my place right now.

Its okay. Its fine even if you take a break for 5 minutes. But let it be a break. Let your brain rest. Treat it as your leisure time. And if you can take a longer break then even better.

Chill out, bake some cookies man, listen to music. Just doom scroll. Hustle is a joke, its a prank and its better to stay the fuck away from it. False urgency is NOT REAL.

Honestly, take a break and not just because of that. You’ll realise how much more productive you are after that. When I was doing my undergraduate in psychology, we had this concept of insight learning. Its basically that when you cannot figure out a solution, just let it be. Go do something else and your subconscious will have an answer ready in an instant.

So taking a break doesn’t mean you aren’t still working. Your brain will, in its subconscious. That is literally its job. So even though you are doom scrolling, your brain is working at it backend. You just have to convince your conscious brain that yeah this break is essential and anyways the backend is at its job right wink wink

Don’t be afraid to take your time, things will work out well for you. Don’t burn yourself out okay? It takes so much to get back on your feet once you get burnout. (been there done that way too many times).

Even if you feel this was unrealistic of them to ask you to take breaks, I hope you just try. Maybe start for like 3 minutes with a timer on and then if you feel it worked, then you can always increase it!

Wish you well pile 3 <3

That’s all I have for you today! Thank you so much for reading🎀🌻Please let me know what resonated I love hearing from y'all<3

[piftamere]

the eclipse

eight - back to the hold house (wc : 707)

“This one,” she insisted, slapping her hand against a slick white dining table. “It’s simple, minimalist. It says ‘put together’.”

Suna leaned his entire weight on the table, like he was trying to break it. “It says ‘I have a dead end job and cry in the shower’.” He knocked on the wood. “Too clean. It’s boring.”

She rolled her eyes, “Fine, what about that one?” She pointed to a huge, dark wood monstrosity a few feet away. “It screams ‘divorced father of two who refuses to pay child support’.”

He smiled, mischievous. “It’s closer to accurate.”

She laughed, bumping his hip with hers as she walked past him. “You’re impossible.”

And that’s when it slipped.

“We’d be the worst married couple ever.”

She froze just a little, then tried to play it off, tossing a glance over her shoulder. “Oh? You think so?”

He shrugged, hands in his pockets. “We’d argue over stupid shit like curtains or throw pillows.”

“You need curtains.” she replied, scandalized.

“See?” He said flatly, as if the lack of emotions would make it sting less. “We wouldn’t last a month.”

They wandered deeper into Ikea’s fake living rooms, still bickering, but progressively it shifted, getting sillier, almost giddy. 

They started pointing to random items, as if they were decorating their home.

“You’d want this ugly leather couch and I'd have to pretend to like it.”

“You’d insist on a themed bathroom. Something awful, ‘marine’.”

Suna grabbed a ridiculous, enormous clock off a display and held it out to her with a false sincerity. “For our kitchen.”

Solemn, she accepted it. “To remind us of the time spent fighting.”

And it went on like that, a little too natural, until they ended up lying side by side on a showroom bed, staring up at the ceiling like they were twenty years deep into a shared life she did not dare to want out loud.

She turned her head, finding him already looking at her. 

“We’d be terrible,” she whispered, a knot tied in her throat.

He held her gaze for a second longer than he should’ve, his lips melting into an almost shy smile. “For sure.”

She looked away first, in an attempt to lessen the weight of the moment.

Suna picked at the skin around his nails, casually breaking the silence. “You got drinks with Bokuto and Akaashi?” 

She gave him a look, between confused and flustered. “Is that a question? You know the answer already.” 

His gaze flicked down briefly, his tone unreadable. “Well yeah. I know.” 

“So?” 

“So what?” 

She tilted her head, insistent. “What is it that you really want to ask?” 

That’s when he stalled. She watched as his fingers froze and his jaw moved, like he was chewing on his words before they left his mouth.

She sighed, impatient. “Suna?” 

“What-who… are ya like… friends?” 

She almost laughed, not unkindly, but in disbelief. She had never seen him seem so unsure. Her smile curled at the edges, sharp. But she bit the inside of her cheeks to keep it in. 

“Akaashi and me? Yes. We’re friends.” 

He squinted at her, wary. “Just friends?” 

“Yes.” She quipped a brow, something buzzing deep in her chest. “ Why? Would it bother you if we were more than friends?” 

He hesitated, looking away. “Dunno. Probably yeah.”

The buzzing got louder, warmer, her heart thrumming in her ears. But before she could get her hopes up any higher, he added, quieter. “Because he’s my friend. That’d be weird, y’know?” 

Oh.

Disappointment swirled in her stomach. She hummed in response, eyes locked on the ceiling, not finding anything smart to say.

He cleared his throat, feeling the weight in the air. “This mattress is comfy.”

“You already have a mattress, Suna.” Her tone sounded harsher than she meant it to. She got up abruptly, crossing her arms over her chest. “Come on, we have furniture to buy.”

He blinked at her, caught off guard. But didn’t argue. He didn’t ask what he did wrong, because it didn’t matter. Not really. Suna simply followed a step behind, his hands in his pockets.

The next thing they picked was a trash can, feeling a little too on the nose if you asked her.

fun facts

akaashi feels stupid for reading too much into the other night with yn, and for feeling like suna betrayed him (even tho he knows it's not rational)

suna felt off since the ikea "date" so he wanted to hang out with his friend to clear his head :(

he's still in denial about yn being the reason akaashi is distant

dexter attacking suna is his karmic punishment

the trash can they picked is ugly and too big, it doesn't quite fit next to his fridge

the eclipse - next

taglist : open!

@lvtilzs @evilari111 @keijicentric @loriiiroari @itsdragonius @haechansbbg @wordsofelie @rowensboat @luvvmae @hrithi11 @graveantics @0rangej0e @sugacor3 @lissyneedstopissy @softtashoney @iluv-ace @sexylexy12 @aspinny @cuteandohsodeadly @folksmione @yosuk-e @nscuit @shozuken @h3xi2g0n3 @heyhihellowhatsup @physicallynothere @sunarinnnnnnn @torkorpse @akaashislovee

[glitter-stained]

Prompt: Christmas Con

Idea: Jason & arrowfam fic in a no cape AU (no no, not the horse movie one. A different fic.)

It's a Christmas fic.

Jason is a realistic "troubled kid" (not a mass murderer -may I insist, this is a civilian AU and no action story. In-world superhero logic does not apply here.) who was adopted as a preteen by Bruce as a preteen. As a teen, he struggled with his mental health, endangering himself with passive suicidality and even running away to find his biological mother -struggles which led Bruce to enroll him in what he thought was a therapy centre, making Jason yet another victim of the troubled teen industry. As an adult, Jason's relationship with the batfam is fraught, as the family doesn't understand Jason's resentment and has been fed over and over the narrative that he's simply a bad kid who refuses to do what's necessary to get better until they -and Jason- eventually started to believe him. On a meta level we have a Jason relatively close to Rebirth here in that he's rather depressed with a very negative opinion of himself, has lost his fire in a way that makes it feel like he's almost unrecognisable to when he first came back (from "therapy") and was so angry on behalf of himself, and that most importantly, he's internalized all the classist bullshit dc has been feeding up about Jason. The main theme of the story is the intersection between classism and psychophobia. Oh and Jason has BPD, because I'm predictable.

Meanwhile Roy is struggling to rebuild his life in the aftermath of his divorce with Jade. Their relationship is complicated; he loved her, and will still always love her in a way, and so will she, and they both love each other so much, but their relationship is so difficult, so much stuff happened due to problems in their work life colliding and many other issues, including issues with Jade's mental health, Jade wishes she could take care of Lian but she's self-aware enough to know she needs to work on stuff and wouldn't be able to give her what she needs, but she still visits a lot and tries her best, but they're also arguing all the time, and Roy is struggling to find balance between work and single-fatherhood, and the stress is giving him cravings and making sobriety more difficult. But from his family's perspective, Jade is just a cold-hearted woman who abandoned Lian and broke Roy's heart, and Roy has had enough of Ollie shit-talking his loved one at every family dinner.

(To clarify, the idea isn't to portray Bruce and Ollie as terrible, but rather misguided parents who thought they were acting in their kid's interest and had maybe an ego problem of assuming they're the ones who know best and Roy and Jason just don't know what's good for them; but the difference highlighted by the parallel, across the story, has to be Ollie's ability to learn and accept that he was wrong, vs Bruce's tendency to double-down on a more comfortable, yet ultimately harmful, point of view.)

So Roy has had enough! And as the next family dinner, he has an idea, one meant to show Ollie just how "spoiled" he's acting when complaining about Jade...

Rose Wilson, survivor of the troubled teen industry and proud self-appointed most annoying roommate, is about to spend Christmas with her newfound brother... But Eddie is invited to a giant christmas party this year, and neither of them is very comfortable leaving their other roommate alone for Christmas. So when Rose's friend approaches her about an issue her brother's having, Rose knows just the way to help her former foster family while helping Jason put his theatre skills to use and get him a friend and a good distraction in this difficult time.

The plan is simple: hire Jason to act as Roy's terrible, deadbeat boyfriend for Christmas to teach Ollie a lesson about talking shit about Roy's ex-wife in front of him and Lian at family dinner.

Jason thinks he's got this one, easy peasy! A frankly comical job that pays great on Christmas day, and all he has to do is behave as an annoying parent's worst nightmare of a boyfriend? He doesn't even have to dust off his acting skills- an unstable, impulsive, asshole street rat like Jason already fits the bill perfectly. A day of food and money, and all he's gotta do is have fun and be himself.

A hiccough, though: the plan is simply not working. Of course, there's Oliver's suspicion and distrust about Roy's taste in partners, Roy's kid who seems convinced he's trying to replace her mom and steal her dad, and this damned chilli that tastes like a non-verbal shovel talk... But be it his defensive demeanor, the cigarette smell, the fact that he dropped out of highschool, or his thick, "vulgar and ill-mannered" Crime Alley drawl, nothing seems to phase this odd, complicated family- and the more Jason learns to know them, the less he wants them to dislike him...

Aka the one where Roy's con to get his family to leave Jade alone accidentally backfires into Jason getting a support system. Can be platonic or romantic! And remember, fuck the troubled teen industry.

[chaoticatgwent]

I got really randomly pissed off thinking about Regis' outfit in Blood and Wine one random Tuesday and redesigned it. My design and notes about it (and an extra super secret totally real Regis outfit) below 💕

My design notes:

I tried to keep as much of the original outfit as possible, the goal wasn't to redraw it completely, tried to just tweak it and keep it on model

Parts I liked and kept: the patches! That was such a nice detail in the original, his shitty patchjobs:)) The bag looks nice too and the shoes were decent. Also little leggins, yes. I also liked the belt sleeve holders, very neat practical storytelling detail.

The Alt 1 fit is not very appealing visually coz it's too one tone and the black vest thing doesn't work as well with the dark undershirt, but I was stupid and drew all of it on one layer, so I couldn't remove it easily and got lazy :,) sorry, but there was an attempt to make it more dark coz he is described as wearing "simple dark robes". Everything having to be dark is already a proper knee kick but I tried to contrast it a bit.

Tried to make it look smudgy and well worn coz Regis is a mess

Original design notes:

I think this image speaks for itself tbh. Like are you shitting my dick where is the iconic cape he bundles himself up in. Where is the apron.

Half of this looks like he took it out of the dumpster and the other like he stole it off a nobleman's corpse. There are way too many little shits and bobbles that give off contradicting vibes.

THE GLOVES ARE A MONSTROSITY. Like the 2 reasons he would possibly be wearing them is 1) he's cold, thats why you wear gloves, which is bs, he doesn't feel cold. And they're fingerless. And 2) to hide the sharp nails they gave him. But once again, THEY'RE FINGERLESS. These gloves not only look horrible but serve no practical purpose except looking odd as fuck coz the dlc is set in Toussaint summer. Who is he gonna rescue with the gloves on?? 'Oh shit sorry let me just remove my dirtyass gloves real quick' ??

The storytelling is missing. Can you tell from this outfit that he's a barber-surgeon? A herbalist? An alchemist?? A vampire?? NO. Nothing. Not saying u should be able to tell he's a vamp but that would be atleast *some* storytelling. This outfit screams "I used to own a shisha bar in the snowy regions of Appalachia and fell on hard times." Pass.

Anyway my design is obv not the best and I did it in like an hour, and I don't want to diminish the hard work of the OG designer, but I wanted to make my own version that is more in sync with how I image Regis and what he would wear:)

Here's also the super secret very legit Alt 2 fit. Completely serious. I'm sorry but he's such a homo he had to be dressed appropriately.

[kuro8066]

Mission successfully failed

dom! male reader × childe | Genshin Impact

In which the eleventh fatui harbinger was supposed to steal an import seal from the general of liyue, instead he got caught and worse he "accidentally " let out a moan when he's being restrained...

Tw: again self indulgent shit so childe might be ooc? But I do think he'd be the type to do this kind of behaviour. A bit suggestive. Not to the point of nsfw but iykyk

___________________________________________

It was just a simple mission. Sneak in, grab the seal, sneak out. It's just the place where the seal is kept is the house of the most feared general in liyue but that's not important. Nothing will be able to stop the eleventh harbinger from taking what he wants after all. Not even the general himself.

That is what childe thought until there's someone pushing him down from the back with great strength.

The general had caught him mid-reach, fingers just grazing the lacquered seal when a hand like steel clamped around his wrist. Before Childe could twist away, his body was bent, pressed flat against the desk with humiliating ease.

“Care to explain what you’re doing in my study, Fatui?”

The voice was deep. Cold. Too close to his ear. Childe’s breath hitched—partly from the pain of the hold, mostly from the sheer authority in that tone.

He could’ve played it cool. Rather he should’ve.

But then childe decided to replied with a cheeky "oh hi general. Didn't see you there." And the general’s knee is slotted between his thighs to restrict movement. A sharp shove to his lower back forced his chest flush against the polished wood. Childe arched—and moaned.

"Ngh!"

It was short. Sharp. A traitorous sound that silenced the room like a dropped blade.

"...Did you just—?"

“No!” he snapped, face burning hotter than the sun at its peak hours, wriggling like a fish on a hook. “That was—it’s cold in here!”

The general did not look convinced.

“…It’s spring.”

“Then your voice was too sexy! I mean—intimidating!”

A pause. The grip on his wrists tightened. Childe groaned again, this time in pure shame.

The general, usually composed to a fault, seemed at a rare loss. Brows slightly furrowed, lips parted as if trying to calculate what just happened.

“I have interrogated many war criminals,” he murmured slowly, “and none of them have… moaned at being restrained.”

“Well, maybe you weren’t doing it right,” Childe quipped before his brain could stop him.

Another silence.

And then—pressure. The general pressed his knee forward again. “You’re testing me.”

Childe grinned, breathless. “Maybe I am, General. Whatcha gonna do about it? Punish me?"

He should’ve been panicking. Cursing. Plotting an escape.

But instead, he was squirming under the general’s firm hold, chest flush to polished mahogany, panting like some low-ranking grunt caught red-handed—and enjoying it.

And Childe could bet his juicy ass he’d never felt this way in his life.

Sure, he’d flirted with nobles, courted danger, and danced the line between pleasure and peril for years. His record was a mosaic of near-scandals and sharp grins. But this?

This wasn’t flirting. This was being handled.

And fuck, did that do something to him.

“You’re quiet all of a sudden” the general noted, voice silk wrapped around steel. His grip didn’t waver. If anything, it pressed harder—as if coaxing the truth from every breath Childe exhaled.

“Just… appreciating the craftsmanship of your desk,” Childe muttered, voice breathy.

The general leaned in, low and deliberate. “You’re flushed. Your pulse is racing. state your purpose of sneaking into my study. What do you intend to do after trespassing on my property?”

Childe choked on a sound that was definitely not a moan. “T-to steal the seal,” he croaked out, though he wasn’t even sure of his goal anymore. “Obviously.”

“Hmm,” the general hummed, unconvinced. “Then why do you look like you’re about to melt into the woodwork, fatui?”

Childe clenched his jaw. This was humiliation on a national level. He should’ve been furious.

But his body was thrumming, nerves singing, something primal clawing inside his chest. Every second in that position chipped away at his pride, and yet—he didn’t want to move.

And that pissed him off more than getting caught.

He hated losing. Despised it. But if this was defeat, then maybe—just maybe—he wouldn’t mind losing to this man.

Not if it meant being held down like this. Spoken to like this. Touched like he mattered and belonged under control.

His voice was barely a whisper. “You gonna keep manhandling me, General? Or do I need to break into your bedroom next time?”

Childe. One. Doesn't know if he's just curious to know what kind of beast he's trying to awaken. Or two. Wants the beast to wake up and ravish him. Or three. Maybe he wants both.

[fansids]

Regarding Boom Silver AU, I'm personally more curious about why did Sonic throw Silver at Shadow of all people. Sure, he's the second parent and is just as responsible for Silver's birth, but come on, this guy, really? Why not Amy? Why not literally any other friend of his? No shade (pun intended) to Shadow, I'm sure he's doing his best, I'm more confused at Sonic's logic here.

Sonic wasn't exactly thinking the straightest that night since he'd just had a surprise birth and was physically and mentally exhausted and panicking, but giving Silver to someone he's close to would be like one of the last things he'd want to do that night. That would've made things... complicated.

Sonic gave Silver to Shadow because he was the other parent, yes, but also because they don't really have a real relationship. They're not friends and I wouldn't even call them rivals since Shadow's beef with him is one-sided. They're barely acquaintances. He can drop Silver on him and never have to think about it again. It's a one and done deal.

It was only after Sonic had a few weeks to calm down and think did he go "oh shit, did I just leave Shadow alone with a baby?! oh shit oh fuck oh shit." Luckily it all seemed to be working out when he passed by that first time.

Also, lowkey Shadow would've done something similar (almost did) but he had no friends at the time and his pride wouldn't allow it. Of course he of all creatures could take care of something as simple as a baby. Ha! That fool Sonic couldn't even handle the first night!

(He was very very close to leaving Silver on Rouge's doorstep when he knocked. Those eye bags did not appear overnight)

[becauseicantthinkwritings]

This, is my Solemn Vow

Part 17 of my Accidentally on Purpose Series!

Billy Russo x Female Reader

Warnings: I don't want to spoil anything, but this part contains similar themes as most other parts of this series, including discussions that may be deemed as dark. Be warned.

It was looming over your head, twisting your insides into knots, and you were pretending that everything was okay.

When you wake up in the morning, he asks you to get dressed, taking you down to the marina, and guiding you onto a barge styled boat, with a restaurant inside.

You have breakfast beside him for the few hours it takes to sail around Sentosa island, wearing a loose yellow sundress, while he wears an olive green t-shirt tucked into black jeans.

You looked like a lemon-lime combo, and you can’t help saying this to him at some point throughout your journey, laughing with him as though everything was alright.

It wasn’t.

You were both pretending and you knew it. Clinging to the role of husband and wife because you had no idea what would happen after.

It was fucking weird.

You would hold his hand, and tuck yourself into the space beside him, but you resisted kissing him, because you were confused and this was confusing and you might tear your hair out if you didn’t clear the air soon. 

It was familiar to you… but also not. 

You could at least admit to yourself that there was an easy friendship here, if nothing else, you liked sitting with him, and listening to him speak, and engaging him in light conversation about tides and wind resistance.

Something twists sharply in your chest at the thought of being only friends with him.

When you get back to your hotel room, you curl your hands into fists, anxious and determined to have it out before you find yourselves stuck in this strange purgatory for much longer.

You strike a match, lighting one of the scented candles you’d gotten in your time here, letting the aroma of sage and Palo Santo wood calm you. 

He’s in your bedroom taking a call, you can hear the calm cadence of his voice as you find the stupid divorce papers, pulling them out of their hiding place in your luggage.

You feel like you’re ambushing him, when you drop it onto the nearby marble countertop, bracing your arms on the sturdy surface and willing yourself to have the strength to say what you have to say.

You hear him step out of the room, his muffled footsteps as he approaches, and then slows down when he notices you.

You gulp, looking up at him, his face is calm, but it’s his eyes that hold all of his heartbreak.

“It’s time for that talk.” You whisper ominously.

He sucks in a shaky breath, approaching, giving you a sharp nod.

“I’ll start simple- I remember that night we got married.”

You watch him nod in understanding.

“I had the rings with me… hoping for a chance to work them in. You stopping to look at the veil was my perfect opportunity.”

“If I hadn’t stopped, did you have a backup plan?”

He glances down, nodding.

“I would have made you sign the papers and fabricated the witnesses.”

You shake your head.

“If I had been a little bit more sober-”

“-but you weren’t. You were tipsy enough to go along with me, and sober enough to consent. I kept you right on that precipice the entire night. I was standing on that balcony, counting the shots you were taking, making sure that you didn’t have more than you could handle. I wanted you impressionable, not unconscious.” 

You can’t fight the horror that his words draw out of you.

“You know how that makes me feel, right? Like I’m just some pawn in your twisted web.”

He swallows, nodding, he doesn’t meet your eyes.

“I know. I just don’t want to hide from you anymore.”

“Did you,” You struggle to ask the words, “Did you have any hand in Dominic breaking up with me?”

The corner of his mouth lifts, he shakes his head.

“I knew he would fuck up eventually. I wanted to kill him so many times, but I needed you to see him for the piece of shit he was.”

“Oh.”

You swallow, trying to get yourself together before you ask your next question.

“What if I didn’t go along with your trap? Would you have killed me?”

He glances up in shock at your question. You give him an apologetic smile, unable to phrase the question in a better way at the moment.

“I could never bear the thought of ever hurting you,” He whispers, approaching till he’s right in front of you. He raises a hand to cup your cheek, “However bad of a person you think I am, I need you to know that no matter what happens between us, I will always put your safety first. I’ve watched you from afar for years, I knew what kind of person you were before I’d ever slipped that ring onto your finger. I hoped that I could give you exactly what you needed if I had the chance.”

You swallow, eyelids fluttering at the soothing feeling of his hands on your face.

“If we got divorced. Would you keep stalking me?”

He holds your gaze, your heart hammering as he answers without hesitation.

“Yes.”

Well, that wasn’t terrifying at all.

“You-” You huff in exasperation, “Why didn’t you just ask me out on a date like a normal person?”

He chuckles.

“I keep trying to tell you- I’m not normal.”

You groan, laughing at his words in the next moment.

“Okay, I wish I had a clear answer, maybe I’m like a dog that isn’t socially adjusted so I do weird shit and hope I don’t get caught. I’ve never been like this before either, I’m usually more… subtle when I approach women. But there’s something about you, something that made me terrified of your rejection.”

His thumbs dance thoughtfully on your cheeks as he looks away, deep in his own head.

“And the more I got to know you, the more I saw you, the real you hiding under all those layers of anxiety and insecurity, I realised that we were more alike than expected.”

You gulp, your dark tryst in the castle coming to mind.

He looks back at you, those dark eyes of his trying to see into your mind.

“Can you honestly say, without a doubt, that you hated seeing how obsessed I was? Would you really rather watch me pretend to be less?”

“That’s not fair,” You argue, “You didn’t give me a choice.”

“I know,” He says firmly, “And don’t you love that?”

You gulp, raising your hands, you push him away, angry at the way he makes you feel with such a dangerous question.

“You’re so-” You were going to say ‘insane,’ but hadn’t he been admitting that the entire time?

You stop, your eyes drawing to the manilla envelope, the gears turning in your head at a too slow rate for you to comprehend.

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” He begs.

It takes you a moment to get the words out.

“I’m… scared that I’ll regret my decision.”

Billy releases a slow breath, and when you turn your head to look at him, his eyebrows are drawn together, the faintest hint of a wrinkle in the space between. His eyes take on a glassy appearance as they fill with unshed tears.

“I’m sorry.” He finally whispers, and you can almost feel the defeat in the tone of his voice.

You glance away, unable to meet his eyes, there’s a strange feeling inside of you, a hurt you can feel coming but it’s not quite there yet.

“For what, exactly?”

“For… loving you the way I do.”

You try not to let your words choke you, though they beg for your decimation. You didn’t know heartache could come on so gradually.

“And what way is that?” You pry.

He’s quiet for a long time, and you glance up at him, seeing the way his words stick in his throat, the same way yours do, the way sweet words have the bitterest taste.

“Tell me.” You demand.

“Please.” You beg.

He still doesn’t meet your eyes.

“I’d let you ruin me, destroy every piece of me,” A slow breath, “If I could just stay with you a second more. A moth and a flame, Icarus and the sun. I don’t want to exist without you.”

Your mind reels with the implication that he thinks you’re going to be his destruction.

It’s a calm sort of anger, your hands shaking imperceptibly, your heart trembling in the very same way.

“Fuck you, Billy Russo.” 

His glassy eyes meet yours, dark pools of love and despair. He doesn’t look away, doesn’t shy from your anger, so ready to accept it, prepared for your rejection.

The way everyone in his life had abandoned him before.

“I didn’t choose this,” You hiss, stepping into his personal space, “I definitely didn’t ask for it. You took any agency I had and made it your own. You made me your own.”

He closes his eyes, it cracks your heart into pieces to watch tears stream down his face.

You reach up swiftly, locking your fingers behind his neck, bringing your face right up to his.

After a moment, you bring your thumbs up to wipe at the tears on the apple of his cheeks.

“You’re not Icarus, Billy, and I am not the sun.” You finally breathe to him.

He shakes his head, disagreeing with you silently.

“It’s true,” You urge, pressing your forehead to his, “You’re not falling.”

And with one final kiss to his lips, you reach over, grabbing the little pile of divorce papers, and letting the edge of it touch the flickering candle.

You hear his choked breath, and you smile, angling the papers so that the fire eats the material faster.

“Till death do us part.” You mumble to yourself, the finality of your decision sinking in, the immediate relief of it comes as fast as the fire does.

One moment he’s letting you hold him, and the next moment he reaches for the papers, pulling them from your hands and dropping them on the counter to continue burning. 

You open your mouth to protest, the papers are going to scorch the marble if they’re not moved, but Billy steals your focus, turning your face forcefully to pull you into a kiss.

You make a sound of surprise, eagerly responding to him, understanding how badly he needs to be reassured right now.

Your kisses are bruising, so forceful that they borderline on pain, you grip his shoulders, humming happily as he pulls you even closer together.  Your brain glitters like shattered glass, embracing sunlight.

“I love you,” He says into your mouth, “I love you. I love you. I love you.”

You can’t help your giggle.

“I love you too, Billy Russo.”

He groans, his hands roam your body, tugging your dress up on his way to squeeze your ass. His mouth is unrelenting, kissing over your neck, down to your clavicle. The pleasure you feel is alive under your skin, begging for more.

“My wife.” He hums in between kisses, “My perfect wife.”

You feel like you’re being mauled, and you can do nothing but take it, smoke fills your nose, and you turn your head to see the divorce papers almost halfway on fire.

You want to warn him about the fire alarm, but at the same time he turns you, pinning your front to the counter, tugging forcefully at the strap of your dress until you hear the seams rip. You only have a second to gasp before he bites down gently on your shoulder.

Pleasure explodes behind your eyes, you shudder as his hands find their way under your dress, palming over your panties, before he slips his warm hands under them.

“I need to feel you.” he breathes into your ear, the heat of his words setting your insides on fire and you nod, your body responding to every part of him.

His fingers find your clit easily, pressing down, he hums in approval when he finds you wet and swollen.

You make an embarrassing squeaking sound, his tongue gently tracing its way over your shoulder, and up your neck a little till his lips meet your ear.

“You're so wet, baby.” He praises easily, “Did hearing how obsessed I am for you get you like this?”

“Yes,” you groan, “Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.”

He chuckles, palming your breast over your dress, while his fingers swirl purposefully over your clit, making your hips move in an attempt to grind on his hand.

“There’s no going back now, you know that right? I’m not letting you leave again. You’re mine. Forever.”

You nod frantically, understanding the consequences of setting the divorce papers on fire, glancing at them, watching the flame consume your only chance at escaping him.

“You’re mine now too.” You breathe.

He swears, pulling his hands away and spinning you once more to face him. His mouth finds yours just as he grips your hips firmly and seats you on the countertop. 

The marble is fucking cold against the back of your thighs, but you can’t help sinking your fingers into his hair and rubbing your tongue against his messily as you hear the clink of his belt being undone.

You smile into the kiss, thinking that he’s so feverishly eager for you and of course, you feel the exact same, reaching down to wrap your fingers around his magnificent cock, his answering groan into your mouth as you stroke him firmly, sending ripples of delight through you.

He huffs, pulling you to the edge of the countertop before tugging your panties to the side. You want this so badly that you feel the ache between your thighs worsen, a thrumming in your center that begs for relief. 

His eyes meet yours when you align the head of his cock to your entrance, searching your eyes for reassurance as he presses in.

“Deep breaths baby.” He guides, watching as your eyes roll shut, nodding your head. He’s big, you almost forgot how big, now astutely obvious as his cock demands you yield for him.

You try to relax as best as possible, feeling him sink in further, making you feel so full.

You whine his name, and he leans in to press a kiss to your mouth, unintentionally sinking himself deeper into you.

Your thighs tremble, wrapping around his hips, you bring your arms over his shoulders so you can bury your face in his neck.

“Doing so good,” He praises, “My perfect little wife.”

You make a keening sound, struggling not to clench around him prematurely, gripping the back of his neck, breathing him in as he fully fits himself into you.

You’re so wet, but it’s been a month without him and it stings in the deepest parts of you, brings about an ache that hurts and feels so undeniably good all at the same time.

He takes a moment, you feel him kiss the top of your head, the gentleness of the act unintentionally making you clench around him.

His next groan has an unhinged manner to it, drawing back subtly to press into you again.

Fuck, it feels immeasurably good, you baffle at the willpower he has to take it slow for your sake.

You can tell he’s trying hard to rein himself in. The veins on his neck poking out from beneath his skin, his breaths are all shuddery against your hair.

You want him insane with desire, tipping your head back, you look up at him before you whisper in your sweetest voice.

“Please, husband, I need you so bad.”

His breath catches in his throat, and you watch as all the self-control bleeds from his eyes.

He makes a low sound, one hand tightening on your hips, the other reaching up to tangle in your hair.

“I was trying to be nice, wife. But you don’t want nice, do you?”

You shake your head rapidly.

He snaps his hips forward, your mouth dropping open at just how forceful his movements are.

He does it again, and you can’t help the little sound of pleasure that leaves you, his cock, stretching you open in a painfully perfect way.

His hand tightens in your hair, tugging so that your head is tipped back while he keeps snapping his hips.

“Do you want me?” He asks, his words warm against your lips.

“Mmm, I do.” You hum in the affirmative.

He grunts.

“Say it.”

“I- ah- I want you.”

His nose brushes yours, “Fuck. Fuck.” he swears.

There’s nothing you can focus on except how primal this feels, to be taken like this, to freely give yourself to him, to feel each movement he makes and have your body respond with bliss. And then his actions grow more forceful, faster, your thighs tremble around his hips, your body shaking as the pleasure overwhelms you, pushing you right up to that edge before you can even comprehend the feeling.

He knows, you watch him grin as he realises how quickly you’re on that brink, body shaking, head swimming in hazy desire with each thrust he makes.

“Do it, sweetheart. Come all over your husband’s cock.”

Your body tightens, and with one final push of his hips, you hit your breaking point. 

An unintentional sound leaves you, your inner walls flutter around his cock as the shockwaves grow more intense, finally gripping him tightly, your eyes rolling back in your head as you lose control of your body. It feels like lightning, the way it electrifies each of your nerve endings, making you feel like there’s energy coming right out of you as you hit that peak.

Your fingers claw into his shirt, gripping for dear life as you come so hard you stop thinking. You hear him groan loudly, his cock fitted deep inside you as you explode around him, giving him exactly what he asked for. You squeeze him so tightly that you swear his length is imprinted into you, dropping your head into the crook of his neck as you come down.

You still shake in the aftermath, looking up at him, you give him a weak smile, holding him closely as you continue to tremble.

“Perfect.” He hums, leaning down to kiss you, and then he withdraws subtly to press into you again.

His pretense of control is all gone, you can tell by the wild look in his eye, and the sharp, uncontrolled movement of his hips. 

He’s so alluring in this moment, taking what he needs from you without apology, his hair askew from your hands, his body hot beneath all his clothes, your orgasm being drawn out by your perfect husband.

“I love you.” Are his last words before he buries his face in your hair and groans- his orgasm taking control of his movements, filling you with his cum.

You even feel his cock throb inside of you, your body so hypersensitive that you feel every little move he makes inside of you..

He laughs deliriously into your hair, and you find yourself smiling in turn.

“Fuck. That- was so fucking good, little wife.”

He studies you, strokes your hair, cups your face to tilt your head up so that he can keep kissing you passionately, moaning into the kiss like he’s still hungry for you, as if his spent cock isn’t already softening inside of you.

He waits, till you’re calm, till your body has stopped shaking, to withdraw himself.

You hum when you feel a touch of soreness, clenching when you can feel his cum, slipping out of you in that uncomfortably messy way you’ve grown to love.

“Does anything hurt?” He asks softly, bringing his mouth back to yours when you look away- glancing at the smoking pile of divorce papers.

“No,” You answer into his mouth because he gives you no other choice. He hums in delight, before scooping you up, walking you down the hallway towards your bed.

“I need to hold you.” He murmurs, as if you don’t already know, seating you on the bed as he undresses himself, kicking his pants away, and pulling his shirt off.

You wait patiently for his help, as he kneels in front of you, clad in only his boxers as he leans in, reaching around to unzip your dress.

You study his tattoo, as he tugs the torn dress down your torso, and you tilt your hips up to let him get it totally off.

You watch his eyes roam over your body, a pleased smile on his face. It takes him a few seconds to locate the ink on your hip.

He blinks, as if he can’t believe what he’s seeing, tilting his head, eyebrows draw together before he looks up at you in surprise.

“Is this real?” He questions, glancing down once more to trace his thumb along the edges.

It’s right at the front, over your hip joint, about the approximate size of your hand.

It’s the same snake that’s on his shoulder, except this time its fangs aren’t bared, its serpentine body is wrapped around the stem of a rose. 

You know what you wanted it to mean, that he owns you, in every dark possessive way he wanted. This was you, allowing yourself to be wrapped up in him, for better or for worse.

It was a sign, that you would always love him, no matter what.

“Snakes,” you whisper softly to him, too afraid to break the trance that he’s in, “shed their skins all the time. They are symbols of transformation and rebirth. Misunderstood, but deadly when underestimated.” You repeat the words he said to you as best as you could remember.

His eyes are filled with tears once more when he looks up at you, a shy smile graces your features as his dark eyes consume you.

His jaw tightens, as he rises, and goes from staring up to looking down.

Desire sparks once more in the deepest parts of you, his darkness is like an aphrodisiac, it makes you want to be very good for him.

“Get naked,” He hums, “Lie back on the bed.”

You tug the straps of your bra down frantically, and then your panties are tossed in his direction when you get them off.

When you settle, he presses his palms to the bed, crawling toward you, fingers gripping around your right ankle to bring it up to his face.

He kisses the inside of your ankle, beard scratching along your skin as he works his way up. His other hand finds your pussy, your mouth dropping open as he rubs his open palm messily over your cunt, his thumb swiping over your clit swiftly.

“Mine.” He finally whispers into your inner thigh, “You’re all mine.”

His words make you rut your hips into his messy palm.

He draws his palm away and you whine, breath stuttering when he brings his hand up to your face, hovering right above your nose.

“Taste us.” He says in a low tone that warns you not to question him. You huff, running your tongue along his palm, humming as you catch remnants of his cum and your arousal on his hand.

When you’re sure his palm is clean, you feel him drag his thumb over your lips, a deep concentration in his eyes, as though he’s trying to stop himself from doing something.

When his fingers go around your throat, cutting off your gasp with a squeeze, you finally begin to get a hint of what you’ve gotten yourself into.

“Tap me on the shoulder if it’s too much.” He murmurs with absolutely zero explanation, your eyes widening and he leans in, and you feel his hard cock pressing into you in the next moment.

You groan, the sound muffled by his hand on your throat, his cum from earlier making it so perfectly easy to slide right into you. 

You feel your body relaxing to accept him, the head of his cock touching your cervix in a way that makes you see stars, your breathing sharp and shallow while he grips your throat.

He begins with a rough pace, that only gets rougher as time goes on, grunting and moaning into your ear, whispering on shaky breaths every version of how good your cunt feels wrapped around his cock.

You wish you could respond to him, or even articulate a thought, but you can actually feel any semblance of thinking leave your head with each move of his body on yours.

Chest to chest, he gives you a delirious smile when he sees the tears of bliss slipping from your eyes, the grip on your throat eases, but doesn't relent.

“Were you hoping to see me react like this, little wife?” He leans in, licking at your tears, “Is this what you fucking wanted?”

You gasp, nodding violently. 

His skin slaps loudly against yours with how forceful his thrusts are, and you begin sobbing, begging him to never stop.

“Stop? No, sweetheart,” He withdraws from you, for only long enough to flip you over, tucking a pillow under your hips, leaning over you till you can feel his front pressed to your back.

“I'm not fucking stopping.” He whispers sweetly right before he enters you again.

Your moan is almost a shout, the way he feels so much bigger, and even more unrelenting in this position.

It doesn't take long before you're mewling out a warning that you're close to orgasm.

“Take every inch of my cock.” He grunts, speeding up the force of his thrusts until you feel like your body is about to supernova.

“I'm gonna keep you like this, nice and full of my cock until you beg me to stop.” He chuckles breathlessly over you, “Forever, little wife.”

Your eyes roll back in your head, your body stiffening as you cry out, before your orgasm slams into you, making you tremble violently as you come.

“That's it- oh fuck you're squeezing me so tight-” He groans, and while you come apart around him, you feel his movements stutter as he releases inside you once more.

You're still trembling as he pulls out of you, collapsing into the sheets as your body aches in sweet bliss. Billy grabs the pillow, tossing it behind him so that he can pull you into him.

You curl against his body happily, resting your head on his bicep, barely able to keep your eyes open but wanting desperately to be reminded of the things you've been missing when he wasn't around.

“I love you.” You sigh, the emotion building too much in your chest to be left unsaid.

He pauses his act of pulling a thin sheet over your bodies to look at you. Tilting his head he smiles softly, before cupping your jaw.

His kiss is deliciously slow, your heart fluttering softly in your chest at the sensation of his slow passion.

He breathes out a sigh, rubbing the length of his nose against yours. 

“Fuck. There aren’t words.” He hums to himself for a second, “Hold on let me think of some.”

You smile, opening your eyes when he raises his head a little, deep in thought, your eyes find their way to the beautiful snake inked onto his perfect skin.

“You don’t have to,” You whisper, “...Find the words I mean.”

“I really do, I need you to understand how much you mean to me.”

“I know.” You protest softly, pressing your palm to his face, moving over his jaw, and down his neck.

He blinks, looking down at you.

“I want to feel your body crushed next to mine in the morning when I wake up. I want to memorise the colour of your eyes in the darkness before I fall asleep.”

He pauses, his eyebrows drawing together as he searches the deepest parts of his brain for the right words.

“I want you to reach out and touch me anytime you want, because when you do, you remind me that there’s a person out there that sees me- all of me- and you’re not scared of it.”

You take a slow breath, trying not to disrupt his thoughts, desperate, hanging on to his every word.

“I’ve spent my entire life trying to be worth something, to convince people that I belonged wherever I was, but I never really believed it… until I met you.”

He finally meets your gaze, tilting his head, giving you a small smile.

“I don’t just love you. It’s more than that. You’re my reason. You’re why I breathe.”

Your breath hitches in your throat, an ache in your chest as you look into his eyes. 

You say his name softly, fingers tangling in his hair as you coax his mouth down to yours.

He groans into it, cupping your jaw to tilt your chin higher.

“My wife.” He whispers into your mouth, before he kisses you again and again.

You grin.

“My husband.” You reply.

.

“What’s taking you so long?” You call from your spot in the warm bath, glancing at the open door, trying to catch any sight of Billy moving around.

“Patience, wife, I’m just getting something.” He calls back.

“Get it faster,” You whine, “I miss you.”

He steps into your line of sight, grinning at you as he raises one of those fancy water bottles in explanation.

You almost want to ask, but you assume he’s bringing water and not wine because of the copious amounts that ‘Dave’ has seen you drink in the last week.

He places the water on the ledge beside you, before kicking his boxers down his legs. You lean forward, allowing him to slide in right behind you, smiling when he grips your hips to pull you into his lap in the warm water.

“I remember our first bath.” He teases, bringing a hand up between your breasts just like the first time, to wrap his slender fingers around your throat.

“What was it I said? Nothing feels more right than this.”

You laugh, closing your eyes, settling against him.

“I have something for you.” He murmurs, and you open your eyes, turning your head to look up at him, thinking about all the possibilities and zeroing in on the most probable.

You can’t help your grin, raising your left hand out of the water expectantly.

Billy blinks in surprise, before he chuckles, reaching to pick up something on the ledge beside him, before he slides it onto your finger.

“You might know me a little too well.” He acknowledges, as you watch your wedding ring glint under all the suds clinging to your hand.

You link your left hand with his right, letting it settle under the water as you relax into him once more, a small kiss to your head.

“If there was anywhere else in the world you wanted to be right now… where would it be?” Billy asks after a few moments, his voice is low and calm, as at ease as you feel.

The corner of your mouth ticks up in mischief.

“I would be… hmm… in a cozy little cabin in the snowy woods.”

He hums, amused.

“All by yourself?”

“No, I have my bodyguard, Dave with me.”

It’s not an answer he was expecting.

“Dave?” Billy asks with an incredulous tone.

You giggle.

“Yeah, it’s cold, and I want to get cozy, and I sort of annoy my bodyguard Dave by making him do things for me because I’m not the best at keeping tabs of everything, so I boss him around a lot, the poor guy.”

“I’m sure Dave likes being bossed around by you.” Billy thinks aloud, playing along.

You nod.

“Yeah, but I’m especially bossy this time, and the snow gets worse, and I make the mistake of drinking a little too much alcohol because it makes me feel so warm.”

You can almost feel the air supercharge with electricity when Billy realises where this is going.

“Definitely, a poor choice, princess.” He murmurs, his breath tickling the shell of your ear.

You clench around nothing, trying to stay perfectly still.

Nodding, you continue talking as if nothing is wrong, “Dave would probably be so angry, having to take care of me, I doubt that’s even his job.”

“On the contrary,” Billy interjects, “His job is to protect you, even if that’s from yourself. If you push him enough, there’s no telling what he might do- or how he might go about teaching you discipline.”

A low moan of delight leaves your throat, you find your hips rolling in need, desperate for friction.

“He’d probably pull my clothes off, so he could touch every part of me, cuffing my hands behind my back-” You shudder when Billy’s fingers find your clit, rubbing generously at the aching spot under the warm water.

“He’d fuck you so hard you wouldn’t be able to walk, mark your pretty skin so that you knew, deep down, who’s really in charge.” Billy raises his other hand to pluck gently at your stiff nipples.

You grin, nodding.

“And then, when I’m nice and full and dripping with his cum, he takes a few pictures so that he can tease me about them later.”

“That’s quite a dream, little wife.”

You smile, turning your head to kiss the column of his neck.

“No rush, we’ll take our time working up to that.”

He kisses the top of your head.

“Of course.”

You shift your hips, feeling his stiff erection under you- telling you exactly how he felt about your pretend scenario. 

There were so many things you wanted to do with him, and you couldn’t wait, the prospect of a lifetime with Billy Russo made you happier than you could imagine. Even better, the knowledge that he was just as content with you, as you were with him, made all of the hardships of the past, present and future seem absolutely worth it.

Because when it really came down to it, you were together now, and it didn’t matter how it started, whether it was accidentally,

Or on purpose.

.

.

.

[madamdeathbees]

I wanted spoilers </3

Oh! Well then here we go, part 2 of bee's impressions of Marazhai's submissive romance, this time with 100% more spoilers

Under the cut, for those who do not want spoilers

All right, so subMarazhai is, in my humblest of opinions, Marazhai's true form. It's much more satisfying to watch a creature like Marazhai, a Drukhar, so proud and arrogant, the true inheritors of the Aeldari legacy, bend the knee to you, a simple human, a mon-keigh.

At first, and he admits to this in Act 5, the dynamic he creates between you–one of dominance and submission–is a game. One that he fully expects you to bow out of, to think is too twisted and frightening to fully appreciate. After all, you're a simple human and you could never understand the depth of emotion that Drukhari are capable of. But....you do.

Over the course of the romance, he tests you multiple times. He pushes at the boundaries of that dynamic that he creates (and demands!) and is disappointed if you don't remain rigid in your role. If you dominate him, then do so consistently! Bully him, tell him to shut his mouth and do as you say, call him your pet xenos. He loves it and will absolutely obey you.

I also think it should be noted that even despite his supposed desire to submit to their dominance, subMarazhai retains physical dominance over the Rogue Trader. He is bigger and stronger than they are, he looms over them and grabs their chin, digs his clawed gauntlets into their skin–if you don't mind me saying so, it's incredibly erotic and thrilling, he knows exactly what he's doing. He tells you that he can literally sense your craving when you approach him for "alone time," and it's true. With the same senses that he uses to feed on pain, he feels the Rogue Trader's desire for him, and he uses that to his advantage. You can't lie to him, not about that ;)

(I could also talk about the fact that while I think that Marazhai is absolutely a submissive, he is a Top through and through, but that's an opinion that many seem to disagree with 😅)

I've talked to people irl about this before, but after reading the Path of the Dark Eldar books by Andy Chambers (HUGELY recommended if you like Drukhari in general, holy shit, they're so good) I like the idea that Marazhai is making the dominance/submission, owner/owned dynamic up as he goes along. Drukhari society is truly not so rigid, roles are constantly shifting and changing. After all, Asdrubael Vect was only a slave before he became the great tyrant of Commorragh. The dynamic that Marazhai creates is one that HE desires, he wants consistency, something that he cannot expect out of Commorragh. Honestly, I think it's rather cute.

Anyway, by the end of the romance, if you're consistent in your "role", he confesses to you that he didn't expect you to understand what he wanted, to understand the "true Aeldari soul," but that he is pleasantly surprised that you did. He tells you that the way he feels at your side is unlike anything he's ever felt, that every raid and feast before you pales in comparison to what it's like WITH you.

Threaten to break up with him after he tells you this. Just do it, trust me, it's so worth it, Will de Renzy-Martin's performance in the last romance scene is fantastic and what you see of him in that moment, his fear and desperation is just. Mwah. Chef's kiss.

Speaking of kisses, make sure you kiss him after your first feast. He says he doesn't like it, but don't let him fool you, he just feels like you're not playing the "game" right. This comes up a lot, especially when you bring up decidedly human notions–he gets pouty and tells you that this is "different," implying that your relationship is something better, more enlightened. Make no mistake, this is love, just Drukhari-flavored.

Under all the blood and gore, the relationship between the Rogue Trader and subMarazhai is incredibly sweet and a delightful twist of Drukhari behavior. He would never say it, of course, but by the end of the romance, it is incredibly obvious that he loves the Rogue Trader and would do anything for them.

So, uh, yeah. This was incredibly rambly, and I'd love to write more, but these are a few of the thoughts that regularly rattle around in my head regarding his romance. I hope this was closer to what you were looking for!

[isabella-2025]

Love you from Dusk Till Dawn Chapter 4 . Warnings: Cursing and that is all.

Let me know what you think?

Any predictions? Comment below

Thank you for all of the love and support. 😊

Evelyn had just finished getting herself a drink when she saw all of the bloodline walk in. She runs up to them and hugs each of them and says

" Hey guys im so glad all of you could come."

" Well duh you know we wouldn't let you celebrate on your own." Trinity says

" Oh Hi Sami and Tama I didn't know you knew these guys." Evelyn says

" Yeah, we've known them for a while." Tama and Sami say at the same time.

" OH okay cool small world, I am gonna go pesters the DJ now okay." Evelyn says

" Okay you go do that birthday girl." Trinity says

As Evelyn walks over to pester the DJ Trinity looks at everyone and says

" We need a plan for if shit goes wrong."

" If she starts to transition Tama and Sami you cant be anywhere near her." Jimmy says

"Why" They both say at the same time.

" because Sami you can barely control yourself as it is when she starts to transition your instincts are going to kick in and you will bite her and hurt her more than she already will be " Jey explains to him.

" Yeah, I dont wanna hurt her." Sami says

" Tama, you can barely control your wolf, when she starts to transition your wolf is gonna take over and mark her and that will hurt her worse than she already will be." Solo explains to Tama.

" I dont wanna hurt her either" Tama says

" So now that we have established that who is gonna hold them back." Roman asks

" Me and Solo will hold Tama back." Tonga says

" Me and Jey will hold Sami back" Jimmy says

" Okay when she starts to transition I will do my best to help her." Trinity says

"Now what are we going to do about the Cody situation?" Solo asks

" well Jacob is the alpha he's the strongest so him and Roman can work together to stop him." Trinity says

" Okay, now we have a plan we just have to watch her carefully." Tonga says

Everyone nods in agreement

The party is in full swing now and Evelyn asks people from the bloodline if they wanna dance Sami and Tama both say they will at the same time. Evelyn laughs and says

" Tama I'll dance with you after Sami gets a turn."

" Okay" Tama says

Sami pulls Evelyn to the dance floor and wraps his arms around her waist. He leans down to her ear and whispers.

" Happy birthday Eve."

" Eve, is that my nickname now Sami." Evelyn jokes with him

" Yeah its simple but elegant and it suits you." Sami says gently kissing her under her ear and he feels Evelyn shutter.

" S-a-m-i what are you doing." Evelyn stutters

" nothing its just you smell so nice." Sami says while gently kissing down her neck.

" Thank you Sami, um I'm gonna go dance with Tama now." Evelyn stutters out.

" Okay" Sami says sadly.

Evelyn walks up to Tama and says

" your turn"

Tama says nothing he just gently grabs her hand and leads her to the dance floor. He gently wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her close. They sway for a few minutes and then Tama leans down and whispers in her ear.

" Happy birthday lynn."

" Lynn, okay I kind of like that nickname." Evelyn says

" Good, it suits you." Tama says

Tama gently presses a kiss under her ear and he feels her shutter. He pulls away, looks at her and says

" I'm sorry I don't know what came over me."

" It's okay Tama." Evelyn says looking him in the eye but she notices something different.

Tama notices her looking at him weirdly and says

" what is it."

" Nothing your eyes were brown and now they look black." Evelyn says

"Oh, um I don't know what that was I'm goanna use the bathroom, okay?" Tama says

" Okay" Evelyn says

Tama walks away frantically and grabs Jacob to talk to him.

Sami grabbed Jey to talk to him as well.

Tama looks at Jacob and says

" I think she is about to transition my wolf is begging to get out and mark her."

Jacob looks at Tamas eyes and notices they are black signaling that his wolf was tryig to take control.

" I see that, you did good walking away before you lost control." Jacob tells him

" Yeah it was really hard." Tama said

" I know it is, hey lets go talk to the others and see if Sami felt anything funny." Jacob says

Tama just nods and they walk over to where Sami and Jey are.

Sami looks at Jey and says

" I think it is going to happen soon I almost lost control and bit her." Sami told Jey

" Well you did good walking way." Jey told him

" I know it was so hard." Sami says

" I know it was." Jey said

Tama and Jacob then tell Sami and Jey that Tama felt the same things and that they all believe that Evelyn's transition will happen soon.

Meanwhile Evelyn had walked around and mingled with the rest of her guests when she suddenly felt off. She walked outside to get some air hoping that she would feel better. She felt extremely hot and cold at the same time and her head was pounding and she wasn't the only one that noticed.

The bloodline had all found there way back to each other and were congregating. Tama and Sami's eyes turned black signaling that there wolf and Vampire had taken over. Everyone hears Evelyn's loud scream from outside and they all run in that direction. They get to where they are and see Evelyn on the ground sweating and shivering at the same time her back is arched and her eyes her jaw is locked in place. She cannot stop screaming. Trinity looks at the others and she runs over to Evelyn and says

" Hey, its okay your gonna be okay look at me please." Trinity says

" what is happening to me Trin ahhhhhhhh hurts so bad." Evelyn yells

" I know it does I will explain everything later just grab my hand and try to stay calm." Trinity says

Evelyn grabs Trinity's hand and squeezes it so hard her knuckles turn white.

Looking on Tama growled loudly and his wolf had fully taken control. He went to rush toward Evelyn but Solo and Tonga hold him back.

" LET ME GO NOW." Tama growls

" No, you can't you will hurt her." Solo says

Tama says nothing and just growls.

Sami is having a hard time controlling himself to. Sami hisses loudly and his fangs are on full display and he rushes toward Evelyn but is held back by Jey and Jimmy.

" LET ME GO NOW. " Sami hisses out.

" No you cant you'll hurt her." Jimmy says

Evelyn is still thrashing around but it has gotten slower and that's when Trinity realizes her transition is almost over. She looks at Evelyn and says

" Good job its almost over okay."

" Okay, God I'm so thirsty and I feel like I could run a mile." Evelyn says

Trinity noticing that Evelyn had calmed down said

" Yes, it'll be like that, come with me and I will explain everything."

They get up to walk inside but are stopped dead in their tracks when they see Cody and Evelyn's dad Jake. Jake looks at Evelyn and says

" Well, Hello sweetie did you miss me."

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….. Did the transition go like you thought it would?

Do you think Tama and Sami controlled themselves well?

How will Evelyn react to the news Trinity will tell her?

How will Evelyn and the others react to Michael and Cody?

Tune in to chapter 5 to find out.

@trippinsorrows @acute-crashout-jeyuso @punksyeet @uceyliyahh @empressdede @southerngirl41 @usoinked @femdisa @holycollectivekitty @bloodlinemadness @livslunaticdamiansdisciple18 @eringobragh420 @officialeve24 @bossbitch-25 @purplementalitybluebird @jstarr86 @madhatterbri @mytribalnightmare @duhitzkay380

[waitlexist]

YEAH NO LUNA IMPRINTS HARD ON THE PEOPLE SURRONDING HER(<- just like me fr...). LIKE SHE COULD THINK SOME SHIT IS SO DUMB AND THEN SOMEONE SHE LIKES LIKES IT AND SHES LIKE "oh no actually it's not too bad ☺️" SHES SO MF SIMPLE.

otherwise i do think she would accidentally yap to Bell for his devious little blog. like she has no clue(i imagine by the time she meets-- or more accurately starts to hang around-- Bell she's dropped that wariness from her homeworld) about the devious intentions. "Oh my Sevens, I found out this really embarrassing story about Ace as a kid, it was SO fucking funny--"

next day, after a devious post: "WHO COULDVE DONE THIS?!" <- idiot

anyways random silly thoughts because ya girl's silly

Fun fact, Azul and Riddle are some of the few that actually call Major... Major.

And even Jade calls Bellamy 'Bellamy'.

...Corwin isn't fond of him. So he uses Major deliberately.

[ahhrenata]

I’m having an ‘oh’ moment while you bandage my hand, man

MY THOUGHTS FOR THIS ONE ARE IN THE TAGS :)

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

hero/villain showdown but one of them has a spontaneous medical emergency and the battle gets put on hold while their archnemesis drives them to Urgent Care

[rosicheeks]

Aftercare is necessary

Everyone say it with me -

Aftercare is necessary

I can’t hear you -

AFTERCARE IS NECESSARY