#not all men but all women are unsafe

[stfulara]

being a girl is fun and all until you dread the road to be safe so you could reach home without being cat-called, slut shamed, groped, abused, raped or murdered

[spengie]

Genuine question. I'm a single mom with two young boys, a sole small business owner, and a homeowner. I have massive student debt, healthcare is always expensive, and I underpay myself so I can pay more money and benefits to my employees. I have a second job to try to make up the difference.

Do I stay and fight, or do I run? I'm terrified that my entire means to support my family and my ability to continue to support my family and my employees and their families is going to be taken from me.

I understand the benefit of showing my kids how to stay and fight. But I also desperately want them to not have to fight for basic human rights. I don't want them to be where I am, massively in debt, struggling to pay for basic necessities, working 60-80 hours a week to keep my dream alive. To keep my community alive. To keep my kids alive.

My personal instinct is to stay and fight. My mom instinct is to protect my boys and flee.

They are at war. I am at war, with myself.

[catboykilljoy97]

So, what I've gathered based on some online sleuthing in various trans communties, is that:

Trans men feel erased in queer spaces and in discussions of trans people. Most of the attention/resources goes to trans women. Isn't that awful?

2. Trans women feel erased in queer spaces and in discussions of trans people. Most of the attention/resources goes to trans men. Isn't that awful?

3. Nonbinary people are lumped into either "basically a trans man" or "basically a trans woman" based on AGAB. No, this isn't regressive at all. Trust us.

4. Everyone involved should violently fucking hate each other and throw as much blame as possible because of this

can i go be a hermit in the woods now. i know that's like, the whole thing i'm trying to escape, but honestly it sounds good rn

[embraceyourdestiny]

It’s crazy how many parts of the quarry are good examples of the patriarchy getting away with shit. If you truly care about abi it’s CRAZZYYY to 1). See nick be aggressive with abi 2). To see nick GRAB Abi 3). And then To see nick THROW HER ACROSS THE FUCKING ROOM and you still don’t shoot him??? If he was attacking a male character or even if a girl was attacking abi way more people would shoot with zero hesitation but the amount of people who are like “let’s keep everyone alive!” And then hesitate when he fucking ATTACKS her is crazy. Y’all wanna keep everyone alive but don’t even protect abi like WTF????

[lady-tortilla-chip]

I will say as much as I genuinely enjoyed the Barbie movie, I reallyyyyy don’t like the response to it

[wewontbesleeping]

still thinking about the time a couple weeks ago that a gay man was talking to me at the bar and started talking about the whole man vs bear thing, and was like. assuming he wasn't part of the "man" side because he was gay. and then making a joke about gay "bears" and how he'd love to be trapped in the woods with one....

[parasiticstars]

We should start ruthlessly gatekeeping and making fun of men for every single interest they have like men do women. Then we should quiz them on whether or not they’re real fans if they don’t know one (1) unbelievably obscure bit of trivia. Then tell them that x is “too feminine” for a RESPECTABLE MAN to like and he’ll never find a gf because of it, or that y is “too masculine” and he’s trying too hard and it’s embarrassing and he’s a pickme. :3

[crumbs-of-bread]

TW violence, SA

The point didn't even miss your head, it striked a missile in the opposite direction huh.

The excercise is NOT about what is more dangerous a bear or a man

Of course you have NO chances with a bear

Its about everything else really

See it that way

A bear will kill you

A man can rape and leave you to live with it

A man can torture you

A man can kidnap you

A man can take you home and then stalk you

A man can do all of those things, kill you AND hide or mutilate your body so your loved ones never know closure

Of course nOT aLL mEn but a predator is not somehow marked for you to recognize them

Men arent more dangerous than bears

But if a bear attacks you and you somehow survived nobody will say

"what were you wearing? You probably triggered him. Its as if you wanted the bear to attack you. At least you can feel special now, you know you're desirable."

Or even better

If you told someone you were mauled by a bear people would believe you.

Its not about "hurr durr a bear is more dangerous of course you choose a man a bear will kill you"

Everybody knows that

But you are almost guaranteed that every bear will kill you, but you never know WHICH man is evil and you never know how evil. Bear is better cause its sure and being mauled by it leaves you with a bit less of a lasting lifetime trauma than being kidnaped assaulted and tortured by someone you thought you can trust.

Not to mention the excercise is also about how men actually react to the answers. They do it with agression.

Countless and i mean countless videos and comments of angry men calling women dumb cunts, whores, bitches, telling them in the most graphic way what a bear will do to them and that they, of course, deserve it

Because they didn't choose a man.

A massive self report of thousands of bitter men, yelling at women "what do you mean you would feel safer with a bear you fucking bitch, bears are wild animals, but you will be torn to shreds and i will gladly watch" proving exactly the point women were making

Bears are more dangerous, you have no chances with a bear.

But a lot of men REALLY hate women, and that is way scarier than an animal that runs on instinct.

i am reminded, my coworkers were discussing "would you rather be alone in the woods with a man or a bear" and i was experiencing Complete Perplexment cause they were like "I would pick the bear" and then I learned this was a whole internet Thing, where women were saying they would rather be alone with a Bear than a random human man, and I was like okay first of all, the status of wildlife education in this country is truly pitiful.

but second, are you telling me that if you were stranded in the wilderness and you saw a bear and in the opposite direction you saw a man coming towards you, you would run from the human person and go TOWARDS the wild bear?

[opashoo]

I'm absolutely losing my mind seeing "We need to not treat men and masculinity as inherently evil and worthy of hatred, and not fall back into biological and gender essentialism because that hurts everyone, including trans women" being misinterpreted as "Women need to stop oppressing men", "I think trans women are actually men" or "You specifically who have trauma around men need to get over it because men are the real victims". It's so willfully disingenuous. It makes me sick how willing people are to read in bad faith, especially how willing other trans women are to suddenly start harassing and dogpiling another trans woman.

I am a trans woman too, I understand what it's like to feel unsafe, but it helps no one this cynical attitude that crops up every time someone suggests being kind to men in our lives. "You could save a man you know from falling down the alt-right pipeline" is not the same as "It's your fault that men murder you". "There are people who could be on our side if we don't meet them with immediate hostility" is not the same as "You need to shut up and stop criticizing power structures for the sake of your oppressors' feelings" (I promise there are a lot of people who can be taught about their complicity in oppression without immediately shutting down but you need to work with them). This kind of attitude isn't somehow more informed or correct. It's just lashing out to avoid considering one's own agency.

Making a better, safer world for ourselves requires all kinds of work, but it's always work. It's hard to try to reach out to people who could very realistically harm us, it's work that not all of us can afford to or are able to do and that's fine because we're all just trying to survive. But some of you would rather condescend, tear each other down, and make more enemies before even considering it a possibility.

[bunny-jpeg]

raw

lando norris

tags: smut/pwp, unprotected/unsafe sex, half-assed pull out method, doggy style, back shots, friends-to-lovers, best friend!lando

lando had to be dreaming. the type of dream he didn't want to wake-up from. he would much rather be here than anywhere else right now. especially as you crossed your arms, letting the mclaren logo stretch across your pretty tits.

the tits that lando had been eyeing for years now. you were his best friend since childhood and now you were in your hotel room for the evening after silverstone with a single request for the grand prix's winner.

fuck me. and fuck me raw. lando had to be dreaming.

you uncrossed your arms and leaned back on the bed with your arms stretched behind you. you gazed up at him. the face of your best friend, the one who knew you better than anyone else. and after years of skirting around the issue, you finally found your words and asked him. and he looked you dumbfounded.

"you? me?" he said as he tried to process your words. you felt a tightness in your chest at the anxiety that was eating you up inside. you didn't know what to say or do.

"am i speaking french, lando? i want to have sex with you, it's about time we resolve this tension. it's been going on for over ten years." you said as you maintained eye contact with him. you felt a little bad for not being the most romantic.

it was hard for you to admit. your entire life you stood firm on the fact that men and women could be friends without any complications! and while you still felt that, you also found yourself with complicated feelings for lando. so, with all the bravery you could muster, you asked for sex.

he shifted from one foot to another, "i don't know how to respond... i mean i do. i just don't wanna sound like a pervert." he chuckled nervously and you only grew warmer in your face.

"do you want me, norris?"

he took his hands out of the pockets of his joggers and cupped his barely hidden erection. he gave you a gentle smile as he said, "i do. i do want you, you've been the subject of my fantasies for a long, long time." and started to take his shirt off.

you did the same, slowly revealing more skin to one another. you felt excitement race up you and you couldn't help yourself. you rubbed your thighs together and felt your pulse pick up.

"lando."

"i know, babe. i know." he chuckled as he got into bed with you. he got his boxers off before he was completely nude, his hands trailed across your body in a manner that left you excited all over.

if your friends knew what you two were doing tonight, hell even your own families, you knew that there would be exchanging high-fives and possibly money over bets made ages ago.

"may i?" he asked as he leaned in closer.

you leaned in to meet the distance and kissed him on the lips. soft as you imagined and his hands only held onto you in a way that made you shudder under him. you moaned into the kiss as he rubbed up against you.

"you tell me if anything goes wrong, okay? don't hide from me." he said, "one thing i hate when it comes to sex, no communication. i want to make my best friend feel good."

you looped your arms around his neck and pressed your chest against his, "i have a feel after tonight we're not going to be best friends."

lando replied, "well, you'll always be my best friend. you'll just also be my girlfriend." then winked before he went in for another kiss. it grew heated and his touches grew more bold.

you looked at him and he smiled down at you. he cupped your cheek while you held him close. it felt right to be this way, to be so close. you kissed him once more and he exhaled deeply against your lips. you two fit perfectly together, just as you always did.

"you want it raw?"

"yes."

"i'll pull out, alright? gotta play it a little safe." he kissed the apple of your cheek before you ended up on your stomach. he hiked you hips up letting your back curve as he pressed himself against you. now on his knees and his cock at full attention.

you looked amazing, beyond amazing. a certain type of beautiful that when lando sank into you wet cunt, he felt the race of excitement through his body. he held onto your hips and carefully inched himself into you. he moaned a little louder, the feeling was intense, there was nothing else he could compare it to you. you were unlike anyone else he had ever slept with. it was different because you two were so close, you shared everything. now you were sharing a night of heated passion.

he admired your backside as he rocked against you. his hand trailed down your back and he loomed over you. you felt amazing, you left a certain want in the back of his throat as he moved against you. lifelong friends, partners through and through. now lovers in bed together, moving together in a heated ecstasy. you both wanted each other, it was painfully obvious.

"you feel amazing." he said softly, "really amazing."

"glad i have a glowing review from lando norris." you chuckled lightly as you held onto the covers under you, your back arched a little more as he hit all the right spots, "can i put that on my tinder profile?"

he pushed you further down onto the bed by the shoulders and moved against you faster, "no way. because you're not going on tinder." he kissed the center of your back as he held you, "because you're my girl now. how does that sound? no more lackluster tinder dates and finally being with the guy you had a crush on for years." then laid another sweet kiss on your heated skin.

you felt the stimulation, your brain felt a little hazy. you moaned a little bit and tensed up for a moment. you panted, "fucking hell, lando. always a way with words." you looked over your shoulder at him as he thrusted against you, "got us into trouble and out of trouble over the words."

he gave you a wicked grin and replied, "oh yeah, and you love it," then pressed into you further. hands on your hips once more as he worked himself against you. the pleasure was zaps in his blood and the feeling was immense.

this was his best friend, and maybe years of pining left him feeling desperate for you. he spent years trying to find you in other people. turned out the whole time he just could have had you. and that made him feel a flutter of love in his chest.

"you feel amazing." he said softly, "better than i could ever imagine. you spoil me, honey." he chuckled lowly as he kissed the shell of your ear as he continued to move against you a little faster.

"fuck, lando." you exhaled deeply, paired with a soft whine as his cock hit against all the right areas. it felt good, better than you could imagine yourself. you knew a younger you would be blushing at the idea that you finally got with lando. having sex in a spacious hotel room and letting him just have his way with you. you fit together quite well, it didn't hurt that you were soaked in the process.

achy for sex. achy for him. you were needy for the sexual pleasure between the two of you. like two magnets drawn together no matter the distance. you were his best friend, and now his lover. his girl.

you moaned a little louder as the pleasure started to reach its peak inside of you. you held onto the covers under you and arched your back a little further. you cursed into the covers and the sight of you was beautiful. to come completely apart under his touch.

"beautiful." he said softly.

"fuck, lando." you shuddered and was met with a hard pat on your behind. the feeling of his hands on you, "you better fucking pull out or i'm gonna kill you."

"of course, of course.' he cooed, "save the kids for after marriage." his tone was cheeky and your pussy clenched around him. he chuckled and leaned up against your ear, "cute." and you whined.

his quickened his pace and he felt the hunger for you in his core. he couldn't believe it. part of him believed that he got hit in the head on the track and this was a fantasy of his. but, hey, if he was currently in the hospital with a goose egg on his head from being hit and this was what his rattled brain could come up with. then who was he to deny it. especially when you felt so good under him.

you tensed up around him once more and gasped against the covers. your eyes squeezed shut as you let out such a sweet moan. you shuddered as you felt yourself reach your orgasm, "fuck." even swears sounded heavenly on your lips.

he remembered trading pokemon cards with you, the time you watched him kart and cheered the loudest out of everyone. the times together, the totally platonic sleepovers. everything, fuck. to have you now, not as a friend but as a lover. that was everything to him.

you climaxed and it only pushed lando further. he pushed right up into you and made you near scream from the sensation. you two moved against each other roughly. but lando had to keep a sense of control or else he was going to finish inside of you.

"that's it. baby, that's it. fucking perfect for me.' his voice heavy with lust and it made your head throb. your cursed into the covers and lando fucked you harder, "next time i'm gonna make you finish twice. burn out your brain." he kissed your cheek, "perfect girl deserves all the orgasms she wants."

"flirt." you whined, face shoved into the covers, which only made lando laugh.

"glad you finally picked up on it, after fifteen years as friends." he thrusted into you a few more times before he pulled himself out and rapidly jerked off his cock against your back. it wasn't the same as the what of your cunt, but it would have to do. his pants were heavy as he said, "that's it, baby. fuck, look at you. you have driven me crazy my entire life. no one else can compare to you."

you laid there panting, your core swamped with wetness and your back curved to let him paint your back with his cum. you whined when you felt the splash of his cum against your backside.

"fuck." his voice was guttural, his breathing heavy and his eyes near rolled back into his head as he came across your hot skin. he felt sparks in his brain and could barely form a coherent thought as he came.

when it was all said and done, he rested fully on his heels, his cock limp between his legs. he rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands and exhaled deeply.

you laid there, not wanting to get cum all over the sheets. as the temperature in the room cooled, you lifted your head a little and said, "lando... can you help me clean up?"

and your best friend turned lover woke back up from his sexual trance and said, "oh, of course! yeah!" then quickly went to find a towel in the bathroom.

you knew you'd had to have a conversation about what you were now. but with butterflies in your stomach you knew you wouldn't be walking out of your hotel room without a lando as your boyfriend <3

[thymechaos]

i just can't believe that oda fucking create sanji, a stereotypical ladies man who simps to an embarrassing degree for women while having his hackles comically raised around everyone he perceives as a man - and most notably butting heads with the more obvious ~manly man~ of the crew. haha, classic anime running gag, the kind that gets obnoxious at times but still makes you laugh.

AND THEN, like a billion chapters later, motherfucker steeples his fingers and goes "soooooooo... what makes a person Like That?"

and the answer is that he grew up in fucking Toxic Masculinity, The Kingdom. the answer is that he was always Different, in a way other guys instinctively perceived as weak, and that made him the target of visceral scorn and violence. the answer is that he was sensitive, sweet, caring, nurturing - feminine-coded traits which are only valued by patriarchy insofar that they're performed by women in service of men. the answer is that in a kingdom comprised almost entirely by violent men, the only ones who were ever kind to him, the only safety he ever had, were a girl and a woman.

so cooking is for women and servants, it makes you less of a man. only women will ever really value you for your passions and dreams. women are also actively hurt by the way the world works, they are unsafe unless they comply with men's violence, and you have to protect them.

(men will always know what you are, and they will hurt you if you let them.)

and even after he leaves... at baratie he is cherished and respected, but even that is an extremely masculine environment. we don't talk about our feelings, we don't let our guard down, the only love is tough love. when he tries to express his artistry and express himself through his cooking, rather than just filling orders and making money, he gets mocked.

so here is a man who will not raise a hand to a woman, because he rejects the masculinity he was raised with and refuses to become yet another man subjecting women to violence. he is desperate for women's attention and affection because it's SAFE, it's the only kind he can trust. other men are potential threats and must be treated as such. he must at all times be snarky, tough, Not Feminine, because to be perceived otherwise is to be powerless, to be hurt.

like y'all. the queer coding of it all? the overtly feminist themes? the active rejection of toxic masculinity and the way it's shown to be directly tied to imperialism? what the fuck.

[spiltcandycoatedpunkblood]

The more I've thought about it recently, the more I realise how ridiculous gendered bathrooms and changing rooms and sports and just spaces are. It does nothing but enforce a gender divide, cause culture wars that distract from the government fucking us all over, intimidate anyone who doesn't conform to strict gender lines and roles and bring about the illusion that social norms and constructs are biologically inherent. And usually, prioritise cis men above cis women and erase all biological differences within the binary group and make sure intersex people are altered to fit them.

[zucchiniegg]

bro one of these days I’m going to walk right into the ocean and not come out again till all of you have logged off of tumblr dot com and taken the time to read one (1) book with your real human eyes

[mxjackparker]

"Rent needs to get paid and food needs to be put on the table whether we're on our periods or not, so what's a sex worker to do?"

An article about how sex workers keep working during our periods and why we often need to. Sex workers are frequently left out of conversations about period poverty and unsafe menstrual products, yet we're one of the groups most incentivized to take risks with our menstrual health so we can keep working!

P.S. This article uses gender neutral language intentionally, including trans men and non-binary people who sell sex and also have periods. As a trans hooker and the guy who wrote this, I'd appreciate people not defaulting to assuming sex workers dealing with these issues are all women!

[drdemonprince]

have you defined the meaning of “white woman brain” anywhere and if not, can you? /gen

Many Black and brown feminist writers have discussed this phenomenon and I encourage you to seek out a lot of writing about this subject, because there are a variety of perspectives, but to distill it, white woman fragility brain is a phenomenon that is not exclusive to either white people or to women, but is especially common among those who can weaponize white womanhood, and it consists of the following qualities:

A view of oneself as a helpless victim that is constantly in threat of being attacked, especially by strangers (even though statistically, this is not the case).

A refusal to consider oneself as capable of doing harm to others, especially a lack of consideration toward others' body autonomy or consent. (even while being highly concerned about one's own autonomy and consent).

A generally passive or passive-aggressive orientation toward the world: seeing oneself as a romantic or sexual object to be approached, but never wanting to initiate (or feeling that one never can), never feeling comfortable directly communicating displeasure or one's desires, believing that others instead must guess at it. (and then resenting people when they don't, but never expressing it).

A tendency to cry, excessively berate oneself, complain about being made to feel "unsafe," or give up when criticized or challenged, especially when challenged by people of color.

A tendency to associate a person's body type with how much of a threat they are. For example, feeling unsafe around people with penises and expecting a social space to accommodate that fear to cater to you, a fear of people who come from cultures where it's common to speak loudly, a fear of those who are large, assertive, and/or darker-skinned.

Instinctive fawning-type responses to stress, and a pattern of feigning happiness, agreeability, and ease when one is not genuinely feeling it, and expecting all other people (but especially other women) to feign happiness as well, paired with a deep-seated resentment of anyone who violates this illusion and expresses any negativity (being especially punitive toward women of color).

Instinctively "smoothing over" conflict between other people before it even begins, even when healthy conflict is necessary and not at all your business-- often performed by gossiping behind other people's backs, triangulating information when it is not yours to share, asking people to alter their behavior in order to avoid a reaction from somebody else, presenting your concerns as if they were somebody else's ("what will people think!"), tone-policing the airing of grievances, derailing hard conversations with more light-hearted topics, and excluding people who are known to be candid and assertive.

Here are some articles on elements of the phenomenon and why it is so dangerous:

Now, I single white cis women out a lot when I am describing this phenomenon, because they have the most to gain from exhibiting these qualities, but make no mistake: this is a pattern that many types of people can and do use. I have seen white trans women use white women's tears to silence critique. I have witnessed women of color being passive-aggressively derailed and silenced by a Black manager who was in a position of institutional power over them. Multiple of the women who sexually harassed me in the story linked above were not white. And LORD knows I see plenty of t boys falling back on this shit, as well as cis men from wealthy backgrounds. It's a mindset that has deep colonial roots and we all must be on the look out for it in ourselves and others, and we must be vigilant in uprooting it.

[plaidos]

well guess what Punkitt? you are making your transgender sisters feel unsafe by insisting that feminist critiques of the way men (of all backgrounds) treat trans women are “insisting that masculinity is Genuinely Evil in some way”. you are making the entire transfeminine community with a strong enough backbone to stand up for ourselves alienated by intentionally misinterpreting transfeminism as “man-hating”, just like antifeminists like yourself did back in the men’s-rights-activism “not all men” era of the early 2010s.

if you genuinely believe these things, you are an antifeminist, period.