#not all men but all women are unsafe

[stfulara]

being a girl is fun and all until you dread the road to be safe so you could reach home without being cat-called, slut shamed, groped, abused, raped or murdered

[catboykilljoy97]

So, what I've gathered based on some online sleuthing in various trans communties, is that:

Trans men feel erased in queer spaces and in discussions of trans people. Most of the attention/resources goes to trans women. Isn't that awful?

2. Trans women feel erased in queer spaces and in discussions of trans people. Most of the attention/resources goes to trans men. Isn't that awful?

3. Nonbinary people are lumped into either "basically a trans man" or "basically a trans woman" based on AGAB. No, this isn't regressive at all. Trust us.

4. Everyone involved should violently fucking hate each other and throw as much blame as possible because of this

can i go be a hermit in the woods now. i know that's like, the whole thing i'm trying to escape, but honestly it sounds good rn

[apostate-in-an-alcove]

Torn between wanting to speak and encourage other women to speak about abuse and trauma they've suffered from men and living in a misogynistic society but also not wanting them to do that too publicly because men are unempathetic monsters who harrass, dox and threaten women who do so.

[queeraliensposts]

Cis people who respond to transphobia with other forms of bigotry are the epitome of performative allyship. Like caring about trans people means caring about

Trans POC

Trans women

Neurodivergent trans people

Working class trans people

Fat trans people

Diabled trans people

Trans immigrants

Trans gay people

Jewish trans people

Muslim trans people

Latine trans people

You either care about all of us or none of us

[lady-tortilla-chip]

I will say as much as I genuinely enjoyed the Barbie movie, I reallyyyyy don’t like the response to it

[psalmsofpsychosis]

--

not gonna dignify this post with a reblog, but i need you to know that people like this are the reason the f*minism movement has went to gutter and cannot climb back out: these women are victims with massive oppressor envy, they have not had a single original thought in their entire lives and they cannot concieve of a form of power outside the arbitrary "oppressed/oppressor" dichotomy, and the slightest chance they get to act of their own free will they become exactly like the very "men" whom they supposedly hate and fight against: shallow, superficial, socially acceptable mean, overgeneralising an entire half of the population thinking they're fun and hip with their barely disguised and unexamined disgust and anger. they're just as unbearable and unpleasant in their cheap gender essentialist judgements as the people who hurt them, and no, making it into a funnyguy joke doesn't save the sentiment. If the first chance you get at free expression has you literally talking and thinking like your oppressors, i'm sorry but you dont want out of the cycle, you just want the upper hand. You want to be the mean one and that's where you go whenever you can. You're literally no different people the people you hate.

[teabutmakeitazure]

what happens after an already shitty day:

goes to eat anti-allergen after finally getting home. waits for a second because of a sneeze. pops in pill and water. sneezes unexpectedly when it goes down. inhales the thing with the water because of the sneeze. births a huge blot clot down there because of the sneeze. chokes on tablet and water because of inhaling it because of sneeze. falls to knees. cannot get help because everyone is in the AC room and no one can hear me. recovers on my own after vision almost blacks out. stands up like nothing happened despite the watering eyes and shaking hands. ends up swallowing pill while recovering.

[wewontbesleeping]

still thinking about the time a couple weeks ago that a gay man was talking to me at the bar and started talking about the whole man vs bear thing, and was like. assuming he wasn't part of the "man" side because he was gay. and then making a joke about gay "bears" and how he'd love to be trapped in the woods with one....

[parasiticstars]

We should start ruthlessly gatekeeping and making fun of men for every single interest they have like men do women. Then we should quiz them on whether or not they’re real fans if they don’t know one (1) unbelievably obscure bit of trivia. Then tell them that x is “too feminine” for a RESPECTABLE MAN to like and he’ll never find a gf because of it, or that y is “too masculine” and he’s trying too hard and it’s embarrassing and he’s a pickme. :3

[moonstrider9904]

Dude today in a parking lot walking past my car stared at me while I was still inside gathering my things, and I felt eyes on me and made eye contact with him because usually pervs freak out when they feel someone's onto them. The dude walked on and I relaxed, but as I was about to get out of the car I checked out the window again and saw that he was at the edge of the parking lot still staring at me, and he even waved.

This was at a mall parking lot. I can't even feel safe from pervs staring at me in a mall in broad fucking daylight. And idk if this man's just stupid enough to think I was looking at him because I was into him (what a dumbass if that was the case) or if he was genuinely planning something else. You cannot be too careful.

Being a woman is fucking hard and dealing with perverted men on the daily is fucking exhausting.

[mosspapi]

This might just be a me thing but I'm so sick of the way that any GNC man is instantly assumed to be "an egg" or otherwise closeted trans woman, mostly in "progressive" spaces.

Like why is it that the second a man shows any form of femininity, it's because he's secretly a woman. Y'all do realize what that sounds like, right.

[rowanhoney]

but rationally Ik I’m going to be okay even though I feel like both a wilting flower and a black hole rn. Because 6 weeks ago my life was wonderful and I was extremely happy and not much has changed. And in 6 weeks again it will be spring which will utterly revive me. I’ll be okay. Seasonal depression is just so embarrassing

[genderqueerdykes]

I've been seeing a disturbing number of "queer safe spaces" describe themselves as things like "femme & them" and even worse "she+," conflating femininity & nonbinaryhood. cease this immediately. say it with me: nonbinary people are NOT women-lite and it is extremely violent and straight up incorrect to imply that all they/thems are fem adjacent. this is erasure and this verbiage does nothing but make gnc and nonbinary spaces unsafe for masc and male nonbinary people. nonbinary, genderqueer and other third gender people can be and are masculine and men, we can be hes as well as shes and theys, stop allowing yourself and your peers to view nonbinary as woman/femme-lite, signed a butch nonbinary person.

[lilgynt]

as a man thing i genuinely hate men and want them dead

[inkskinned]

what is with men being mad any time a woman raises her voice where did that even come from. someone posted a video of a small electrical explosion, and the top comment was of course the woman screams. the second comment is women try not to scream challenge, level impossible. i had to go back and watch the video again. there is, somewhat fainty, a little gasp emitted off-camera, more of a yelp than a scream. it is mostly lost in the crack of the explosion. afterwards, you hear her voice, shaken, say, are you okay?

i am helping one of my friends train her voice pitch lower, because she wants to be taken seriously at work. she and i do each other's nails and talk about gender roles; and how - due to our appearance - neither of us have ever been able to be "hysterical" in public. we both appear young and sweet and feminine. she is cisgender, and cannot use her natural voice in her profession because people keep saying she appears to be "vapid". we both try to figure out if our purposeful voice lowering is technically sexist. is it promoting something when you are a victim to it?

a storm almost sends a pole through a car window. in the dashcam, you can hear the woman passenger say her partner's name twice, crying out in alarm. she sounds terrified. in the comments, she is lambasted for her lack of calm. how is that even fucking helping?

in high school, i taught myself to have a lower voice. i had been recorded when i was genuinely (and righteously) upset; and i hated how my voice sounded on the phone speakers when it was played back. i was defending my mom, and my voice cracked with emotion. it meant i was no longer winning the argument: i was just shrieking about it.

girls meet each other after a long summer and let out a little joyful scream. this usually stops around 12-14, because people will not tolerate this display of affection (as it has the effect of being passingly annoying). something about the fact that little girls can't ever even be annoying. we are trained to examine each part of our lives (even joy) for anything that could make us upsetting and disgusting. they act like teenage girls are breaking into houses and shrieking you awake at 3 in the morning. speaking as a public school educator: trust me, it's not that bad, you can just roll your eyes and move on. it does not compare to the ways boys end up being annoying: slurs in graffiti, purposefully mocking your body, following you after you said no. you know, just boy things.

there's another video of a man who is not allowed to yell in the house, so he snaps his fingers when he's excited about soccer. the comments are full of angry men, talking about how their brother is unfairly caged. let him express himself and this is terrible to do to someone. eventually the couple has to address it in a second video: they are married with a newborn baby. he was trying not to wake the infant up. there is no comment on the fact women are not allowed to yell indoors. or the fact that it could have been really alarming or triggering for his wife. sometimes i wonder if straight men even like women, if they even enjoy being in relationships with them.

for the longest time, i hated roller coasters because it always felt inappropriate and uncomfortable for me to scream. one of my friends called me on it, said it was unusual i'm so unwilling. i had to go to my therapist about it. i don't like to scream because i was not raised in a safe situation, and raising my voice would have brought unsafe attention towards me. even when i am supposed to scream, it feels shameful, guilty. i was not treated kindly, so i lack a basic form of self-protection. this is not a natural response. it is not good that in a situation of high adrenaline - i shut up about it.

something very bad is happening, i think. in between all the beauty standards and the stuff i've already discussed - this one feels new and cruel in a way i can't quite express. yes, it's scary and silencing. but there's something about how direct it is - that so many men agree with the sentiment that women should never yell, even in an emergency - it feels different.

is the word shriek gendered automatically? how about shrill or screech? in self defense class, one of the first things they tell you is to yell, as loud and as shrilly as you can. they say it will feel rude. most women will not do this. you need to practice overcoming the social pressure and just scream.

most women do not cry out, even when it's bad. we do not report it. we walk faster. we do not make a scene. what would be the point of doing anything else? no matter what we do, we don't get taken seriously. it is a joke to them. an instagram caption punchline. we have to present ourselves as silent, beautiful, captivating - "valuable."

a woman is outside watching her kids when someone throws a firecracker at them. she screams and runs towards her children. in the comments, grown men flock together in the thousands: god. women are so annoying.

[thymechaos]

i just can't believe that oda fucking create sanji, a stereotypical ladies man who simps to an embarrassing degree for women while having his hackles comically raised around everyone he perceives as a man - and most notably butting heads with the more obvious ~manly man~ of the crew. haha, classic anime running gag, the kind that gets obnoxious at times but still makes you laugh.

AND THEN, like a billion chapters later, motherfucker steeples his fingers and goes "soooooooo... what makes a person Like That?"

and the answer is that he grew up in fucking Toxic Masculinity, The Kingdom. the answer is that he was always Different, in a way other guys instinctively perceived as weak, and that made him the target of visceral scorn and violence. the answer is that he was sensitive, sweet, caring, nurturing - feminine-coded traits which are only valued by patriarchy insofar that they're performed by women in service of men. the answer is that in a kingdom comprised almost entirely by violent men, the only ones who were ever kind to him, the only safety he ever had, were a girl and a woman.

so cooking is for women and servants, it makes you less of a man. only women will ever really value you for your passions and dreams. women are also actively hurt by the way the world works, they are unsafe unless they comply with men's violence, and you have to protect them.

(men will always know what you are, and they will hurt you if you let them.)

and even after he leaves... at baratie he is cherished and respected, but even that is an extremely masculine environment. we don't talk about our feelings, we don't let our guard down, the only love is tough love. when he tries to express his artistry and express himself through his cooking, rather than just filling orders and making money, he gets mocked.

so here is a man who will not raise a hand to a woman, because he rejects the masculinity he was raised with and refuses to become yet another man subjecting women to violence. he is desperate for women's attention and affection because it's SAFE, it's the only kind he can trust. other men are potential threats and must be treated as such. he must at all times be snarky, tough, Not Feminine, because to be perceived otherwise is to be powerless, to be hurt.

like y'all. the queer coding of it all? the overtly feminist themes? the active rejection of toxic masculinity and the way it's shown to be directly tied to imperialism? what the fuck.