#not a romantic rescue in the rain complete with umbrella cover

[gl-saveme]

I’ll help you find it. Come on. ☂️

[greenhappyseed]

BnHA 324 - Review, parallels, and comparisons

Ochako time again! Play to the crowd with your big hit sound! (See the lyrics for “Break It Down Again” by Tears for Fears; it’s 80s/90s new wave goodness.) Since The Speech is proving divisive, I’ll split it up a bit.

The good:

Screen time for Ochako! And fierce Ochako at that. Personally, the speech feels OOC to me, but then again, Ochako does that sometimes. Remember when the series mocked her “inconsistent characterization”?

Ochako’s not making decisions due to her crush. It’s pretty clear she’s acting as a hero and thinking about saving a fellow hero as part of a mission with her class.

If Izuku and Ochako are building towards a romantic relationship, then I think Izuku watching her be a strong hero is a prerequisite. Let’s be honest, Izuku only swoons for heroes.

This is the first time a hero saves someone who looks like a villain and citizens think is a villain. True, Izuku isn’t actually a villain, but if the crowd accepts him then it’s “one step” towards redeeming the actual villains.

Like last chapter, some of Ochako’s words (“he has a lot to learn”) can be read as insulting to Izuku. But it works. She called Izuku a plain-looking boy early on and has always seen his strengths and weaknesses up close (as 324 reminds us, they first met when he fell flat on his face and she caught him before he hit the ground). He’s not a perfect hero, or even a “complete” hero, but he’s worth saving all the same.

The bad:

It’s the spontaneous ramblings of a 16 year old and could never, on its own, persuade any rational adult. If the chain continues and we have more people speaking up to vouch for Izuku, and we end up going full Spartacus, then we might have something.

From a structural perspective, these chapters are broken up into tiny shards. One moment is spread over 3 (soon to be 4) chapters, interspersed with flashbacks from different characters and multiple narrators (Nezu and Ochako being the main ones, but Izuku takes over at the end of 324 and Iida has a bit too). Just figuring out who is talking — and when in the timeline they’re talking — is challenging and breaks up the flow.

It feels like every few panels is trying to hit a thematic beat and then assign that beat to a character rather than build out how each character reacts to a theme.

The pros and mentors are infantilized to a pretty extreme degree. Hawks wowed the crowd at the billboard rankings; Thirteen is a rescue hero skilled at managing disaster zones; Present Mic is a radio DJ and entertainer as well as a pro hero; and Jeany used to give speeches in Vigilantes about heroism. But in a series that has taken great pains to show the technical skill of the top adult pro heroes, it feels like they’re being nerfed to give Ochako her moment.

The …maybe?:

Ochako’s message calls back to the Top 3 press conference in Ch.306 (which she narrated). In 306, upon being challenged that he didn’t understand the pain of the average citizen, Endeavor asked if heroes showing their exhaustion and tears would fix everything. The reporter representing the “angry mob” said no, heroes need to take down every last villain. Endeavor agreed that action and a finding path forward was the right thing to do. He basically admitted heroes wear masks to hide their true feelings so they can focus on their jobs. But now in 324 (right side below), Ochako takes the opposite approach. She says she can’t reassure the crowd because she, and all the other heroes, are scared too. I can see how that helps the heroes, but not how it calms the crowd. Maybe Ochako’s speech is better read as a rallying call for others who will do the actual crowd persuasion.

Seeing 2 panels of Endeavor when Ochako talks about a hero hurting and heroES hurting is … a choice. My guess is it’s a nod to Endeavor as #1 and his failing to ever put people (including fellow heroes) at ease. When heroes are hurting and the pro hero profession is under criticism, it was, traditionally, on his shoulders to fix it as the #1. But it really shouldn’t be. If a coordinated raid of hundreds of heroes failed, then it can’t be on one man (who is himself a hero and not a strategist or administrator) to protect them all.

Ok, let’s talk about some non-speech bits!

Hell YES it’s Izuku’s hero academy and he’s earned his place there for the rest of his life just like All Might. (I suspect this means if he loses OFA at the end, Nezu will still accept him at UA). It’s a good reminder that Izuku still needs to hear that he has become a hero and he belongs with other heroes. Actions matter first and foremost, but words DO matter too.

The “smile together again” motif has been bothering me because it’s repeated by several characters. But IIRC it comes from Nighteye, and only All Might, Mirio, and Izuku think of “smiling” as such an important thing. Iida and Ochako weren’t a part of the Nighteye storyline aside from Ochako evacuating Nighteye post-injury, so it’s odd to hear them so focused on smiles. Same for Bakugo — the remedial class taught him about saving hearts but the smile thing is much more an All Might/Nighteye concern. The other mention of smiling this arc has been Endeavor and Hawks taking about AFO, who is always smiling.

Aizawa is in the hospital alone (sob!). His friends and coworkers are all off doing their duty, sacrificing a personal connection for the greater good. But…is he looking at a tablet? Like is he FaceTiming???? I want to know for real, but I’m also feeling spicy and want to see wrong answers.

The guy in the All Might shirt is fascinating. Last chapter he was dismissive of Izuku’s special power (not realizing Izuku is All Might’s handpicked successor or that Izuku’s power IS All Might’s quirk). This chapter he’s asking if the heroes expect him to be covered in filth. The irony here is that All Might very much expected Izuku to get dirty and do the unglamorous work of cleaning a beach as the “first step” to gaining entry to UA. (Oh, and Izuku was wearing an All Might T-shirt at their first beach meeting.)

(And remember, Izuku’s literal first step on the UA campus was when he fell and Ochako saved him.)

Finally, the umbrellas. Did anyone notice how the citizens started sharing their umbrellas at the end of this chapter? The guy in the All Might tshirt was offered shelter by starshirt dude. And the front line citizens who were previously pumping their umbrellas in the air and holding hands to stop Izuku are now bringing umbrellas down and using them for cover while their hands separate. Also, Mitsuki shares an umbrella with Inko. It’s like, I said I'll always be your friend, took an oath, I’mma stick it out til the end. Now it’s raining more than ever, know that we’ll still have each other. You can stand under my umbrella. Eh?

[nobody-wants-ice-cream]

Everything Wrong With The Umbrella Academy. Episode 3, Extra Ordinary.

We Only See Each Other at Weddings and Funerals

Run Boy Run

Usual disclaimer: This is all in good fun! I wanted to do a really nitpicky re-watch of the series and found some really cool and interesting things I didn’t notice before. This is meant to have a Cinema Sins-esque tone. However, I did take off a lot more sins than Cinema Sins would have because I do genuinely like the series and the people that made it possible. So all of the good things got one sin off and all the bad things got one sin added. This is a really long post, so grab some popcorn. If there’s anything that I missed, feel free to add it!

Vanya was clearly about to sell her violin. She looked dejected and sad and was detached from her violin case. This is in character for Vanya on her pills, who must have decided that she wasn’t good enough at one point. Sin for putting Vanya through trauma. +1

The Umbrella Academy comics are priced weirdly. The one on the right is $25.00 and the one on the left is $15.00. What makes the one on the right more expensive? It even says on the cover that the one on the right was supposed to be $0.50. So why the inflation? Taking a closer look, all six heroes are on the cover, so it’s not that either of them are pre-Five leaving and therefore more expensive because Five is on both of them. Though, the one on the right does have a picture of Luther, Diego, Allison, Klaus, Ben, and Reginald under where it says that the comic is 50 cents. To make a long rant short, the comics that Vanya looks at in the pawn shop window are confusing. +1

However, Gabriel Ba’s art. -1

The strange lack of technology means that Vanya’s book was written on a typewriter. +1

Vanya needed 6 pencils to write her book with. These are maybe supposed to symbolize Vanya’s 6 siblings, in which case, interesting detail, but still. Six pencils. As opposed to one pencil and a pencil sharpener? Why all the tools Vanya? +1

The six pencils (with two pointer up) symbolize Vanya’s six siblings, two of which turned around since the siblings they are supposed to represent (Five and Ben) are no longer around. -1

Vanya’s dying houseplant. Water that! +1

Vanya collects another houseplant and it looks relatively healthy. -1

The messy table garbage still has the same plate and same crumpled papers/napkins in the same position. Either Vanya was super lazy, or the set designer/director was. +1

Vanya replaced the dying houseplant with the fresh one. Poor houseplant. I will mourn you. +1

“Lost Woman” has some really on the nose lyrics. Playing the phrase “lonely woman” before Vanya starts narrating her book is ridiculously on the nose. +1

However, “Lost Woman” happens to be one of my favorite tracks from the series. -1

Luther should be part ape in this scene, (as it takes place five years ago, not seven), but he looks completely normal. This is a massive continuity error so I’m adding two sins. +2

“Starved for attention” is the line Vanya narrates over Allison reading it. On. The. Nose. +1

Diego is so pissed off at Vanya that he tapes her likeness to a punching bag and punches it. You know, like a rational adult. +1

Klaus is wearing birkenstocks and burgundy capris. +1

Also, Ben and Klaus work together to read a book. -1

But I have to ask, why did the rehab let Klaus read during group therapy. And shush his dead brother’s ghost. +1

Ben is pissed off by the line “and haunted by what might have been.” On the nose. +1

Five reads the harsh line “we all wanted to be loved by a man incapable of giving love” while next to Dolores, who is also incapable of giving love because she is a mannequin. Also, Five reads this book, full of vitriol and hate, as the last connection he has to his siblings, at age thirteen. +2

Reginald doesn’t read the book that his daughter wrote. As usual, Reggie is a dick to Vanya. +1

Vanya’s reaction to being late to rehearsal is so relatable. I swear I have done this a thousand times as a musician. -1

The Netflix captions (yes I watch with captions) say “Chamber music playing”. They have a conductor. +1

The conductor has the character of all conductors. Dick. +1

Vanya isn’t vibrating when the rest of the orchestra is. Late or not, you still need to follow the concertmaster, Vanya. +1

The rainy weather matching Vanya’s stormy mood. Foreshadowing. -1

Badass umbrella title screen. -1

However, why are all those people stopping in the street? It’s raining, get to where you’re going! +1

Allison and Luther watch the tape where Reggie dies over and over. This is weird, even if they are trying to figure out if Grace killed him. Who would want to watch someone die over and over? Not even I want to replay Reggie dying, and I genuinely hate him. +1

Luther says that Reggie thought people were out to get him. On the first watch, the audience can chalk this up to Reggie being a paranoid old man, however on the second watch we know that the Commission exists and that Reggie is probably not from this world. So either of those groups could have been out to get him. But who? This remains a sin until they explain it. +1

Training posters in the kitchen. The kitchen! Really, Reggie. +1

There’s this weird caterpillar thing with a face behind Grace in this scene. What the hell is that? +1

There was also a radio in the kitchen, which implies that Reggie either let them listen to tunes, or had training cassettes the same way he had training records. Either way, what the hell, Reggie? +1

There is a ridiculous amount of light sources in this one room. +1

Grace has a cactus full of toothpicks or skewers by the stove. Cute art project, whichever kid but likely Diego based on his fascination with pointy things. -1

The “your father was a great man” speech. Poor Grace. +1

Jordan Clare Robbins is an excellent actress. -1

Smiley face made of two eggs and a strip of bacon. -1

Diego doesn’t understand the chain of custody regarding evidence. Patch says that if he touches a piece of evidence, she can’t use it in her case. How many murderers have walked free because of Diego? +1

Hazel and Cha Cha use bullets from 1963. Dallas foreshadowing? Remains a sin until season two confirms the Dallas plot. +1

These bullets were found on the random local hires Five killed at Griddy’s. Why does the Commission use bullets from the early 60’s? Isn’t that a big red flag to their time organization? +1

Patch indulges Diego the Vigilante by asking for his help. You’re a police officer, you got this, Patch. Also, this foreshadows her death when she does things his way and gets killed for it.  +1

Diego tells Patch to investigate Five. Oh, the irony. +1

“I do give a shit” is such a weird line to try to portray as romantic with the music, tone, and lighting, show. +1

Beeman, unprofessionally, brings up the fact that Patch and Diego used to date while at a crime scene. +1

Vanya washes her hands for two seconds and then goes to talk to Helen. Almost like that was the real reason why she was in there. +1

Vanya attempts to compliment Helen Cho, who is overall, not interested. Is this Vanya’s repressed way of flirting? Pick a better time.+1

Seriously, what is with Vanya and starting conversations at the absolute worst time. It’s like she wants to get insulted. +1

No way in hell would one professional musician to another be this bitchy, Helen Cho. +1

Helen straight up calls Vanya talentless. What an awful thing to say! +1

She softens, as if she just gave Vanya legitimate career advice, but she didn’t. She really just insulted the time and effort Vanya put into her instrument. As a musician, I can confirm that what Helen just said is the equivalent of saying something really, really nasty. Tumblr hate anons have nothing on what Helen just said. +3

Vanya takes a pill after being called talentless. Pill foreshadowing. -1

Cha Cha uses a curling iron to cauterise the wound Five gave her from the shovel. Where did the curling iron come from? +1

“The entire fate of the universe” oh Hazel. Thanks for the irony. +1

How did no one in the history of this shady motel notice the hidden panel? You would think at least one person attempting to have shower sex or someone cleaning or  someone doing matinence should have noticed that, right? +1

Five stitches up his wound by himself despite the fact that multiple people are in the house that are capable. He’s going to pull a few of those based on the angle. Also, Five didn’t bother to clean the blood off his arm, so who knows if he bothered to sterilize the needle or his hands or anything. +1

The wound on Cha Cha and the wound on Five are eerily similar. However, what makes them interesting is that Cha Cha decided to cauterize where Five decided to stitch. Both are decent methods, but Cha Cha’s way is going to leave severe permanent scarring and Five’s way might heal. This could foreshadow the way they treat the end of the world. Cha Cha wants to end it, Five wants to fix it. Maybe not Cha Cha herself, but she does represent the Commission and their ideals. She is a stickler for their rules and uses her last moments to try to call them and get rescued. Point is. This is an English teacher moment full of symbolism, and I respect the show for this choice. -1

Billy the Choo Choo bandages. First of all, Five can never get away from the childishness of his current form. Second of all, Reggie let Five have “Billy the Choo Choo” licenced bandages??? +1

Or, Five chose to buy/steal these bandages. +1

Five puts a clean, white uniform shirt over blood that he still hasn’t cleaned up. At this point, that has got to be uncomfortably sticky. +1

Five didn’t bother to clean his wound until morning. “I guess I’ll go to sleep and bleed”???+1

Or, it took Five several hours to get the supplies. Bullshit. No way in hell did Reggie not have those supplies lying around. +1

Five still chooses to wear the full uniform ensemble even though he could at the very least get rid of the tie. +1

The teleporting kid gets the fire escape bedroom. It’s like Reggie was begging Five to sneak out of the house. +1

Dumpster Bagel: Do Not Eat. +1

“I’m done funding your drug habit” you never did in the first place? You didn’t pay him at all for that magnificent acting?? Unless Five did this before he left the mansion, in which case, Five funded Klaus’s drug habit. +1

Justin Min looks so incredibly creepy sitting on the dumpster. He has such a blank expression. Also, when did he move from the fire escape? +1

“I love you. Even if you can’t love yourself!” is a great line. -1

When Five drives away in the stolen van, he passes an absolutely bewildered guy. How the hell did Five function as an assassin? He can’t do subtlety. This contradicts “I know how to do everything”. +1

Was Aidan Gallagher actually driving in this scene? Because it kind of looks like the way a beginner would drive. This also contradicts “I know how to do everything” +1

There’s a lady passing Meritech that actually chose to wear a baby pink fedora. M’costume. +1

Five left his wife stuck in a bag and didn’t remember her. +1

He also left a bottle of some clear liquor on top of her. +1

“This is the place that it was made. Or will be made.” The delivery on this line was kinda bad. +1

Allison used her power on Claire. Claire was three years old. No matter which way you slice it, this is the shittiest thing Allison has ever done. She’s working on it, but the fact that it happened deserves a sin. +1

Emmy Raver-Lampman is a kick ass actress. -1

Allison has the most warranted case of impostor syndrome ever. Sin off because this is the one of the few scenes where two characters actually talk about their emotions. -1

Luther and Allison had that conversation sitting ridiculously far apart. +1

Leonard’s shop is called “Imperial Woodwares” Apparently, he delivers as well. How did Leonard get the business and woodworking skills necessary for running a relatively successful shop while in prison? +1

Leonard somehow knows that Vanya’s orchestra (which rehearses and performs in the Icarus Theatre) is far from Bricktown. At this point, he shouldn’t know that unless that is the only orchestra in the entire city. There is no way that that is the only orchestra in the entire city. +1

Leonard took up wood carving in prison. Is that allowed? +1

If a guy you just met makes a wood carving in your likeness you should run. Run like hell. Get a restraining order. That is so creepy. Obvious villain is obvious. +1

Also, I once read a fanfic (The Moon Laughs by Lady_Origami on ao3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/17959847/chapters/42417584) where a character is kidnaped by Leonard and tortured in this backroom where he’s showing Vanya the creepy statue. I can see where the inspiration came from. This back room has “place to keep the person I kidnaped and torture them” vibes.+1

Leonard stayed up all night to make the creepy woodcarving. He then insists that Vanya take it. And Vanya doesn’t recognize the creepy vibes. +1

And she does take it! +1

Leonard says that he made the carving for her and that she inspired him. Obvious manipulation is obvious.  +1

Leonard is a dick to Vanya by using Allison’s successful career. +1

Leonard doesn’t like the Beatles. +1

Why did Allison go to Bricktown to find Vanya when that is nowhere near the theatre or Vanya’s apartment? Was she just wandering around hoping to find Vanya? +1

Allison is the Queen of actually talking out her thoughts and feelings. She just apologized to Vanya and explained why she was so angry in the last episode. Well done. I respect that. -1

Allison and Vanya sisterly bonding. -1

Five sees children playing and then immediately starts having an apocalypse flashback. This shows that Five lost his childhood as soon as he time traveled to the apocalypse. I’m sad now. +1

Aidan Gallagher plays this really well. -1

If you look closely, you can see Five/Aidan Gallagher laughing at Luther/Tom Hopper because he can’t fit in the van. I can’t tell if Five is laughing at Luther or if Aidan is laughing at Tom. Either way, that slaps. -1

However, corpsing. +1

No one has written Klaus/Dolores fanfic yet. They really hit it off in the van, y’all. +1

Five throws an empty can at Klaus for messing with Dolores. +1

Klaus’s expression after Five says “does it matter, it’s Klaus.” Sinning because Five is a dick to Klaus. +1

“Did I ever tell you about the time I tried to wax my ass with chocolate pudding. It was so painful.” I love this line. God bless Robert Sheehan. -1

Aidan Gallagher contemplates this line then starts corpsing. I don’t blame him. I’ve been trying to figure out how that would be possible too. -1

How can you use chocolate pudding to wax any hair? +1

Aidan Gallagher laughs at this line, meaning Five found this funny, but didn’t want to give Klaus the satisfaction of laughing. +1

Luther and Five are dicks to Klaus. They kicked him out of the van! Assholes. +1

Luther is sort of trying to connect with Five, but he fails miserably because it comes out really condescending. +1

“I don’t think that I’m better than you, Number One. I know I am.” Hubris much, Five? +1

Luther is already sick of Five’s “I’m better than you, I’ve done things you couldn’t comprehend” schtick and Five has only been back for three days. And we make fun of Luther’s moon thing. We get it, Five, you’re a badass. Actions speak louder than words, old man. +1

On the side of the Variety Store Klaus steals from is a billboard for Clever Crisp Cereal, which is the cereal that  Reggie invented in the comics. I guess he did that here too. -1

Also, Klaus steals from the Variety Store and drops everything while running away. Why did you steal so much shit if you knew you were going to drop it all Klaus? +1

Ben’s reaction to this buffoonery must have been hilarious. Sinning the show for not showing us that. +1

“Now I’m starting to wonder if that was the wisest decision.” What? Kicking Klaus out of the van or Klaus deciding to rob the store? Because both were pretty stupid. +1

Does Agnes own Griddy’s? +1

Agnes just gave some valuable baking tips when it comes to doughnuts. Thanks, Agnes. -1

Agnes and Hazel are really cute together. -1

The Hazel and Agnes theme is my favorite instrumental piece from the whole show. -1

There are still bullet holes in the walls. Attention to detail! -1

Hazel and Cha Cha pretend to be social workers or private detectives concerned for Five’s well being. Oh, the irony. +1

“I mean who lets a kid get a tattoo” Reginald Hargreeves. That’s who. +12

Agnes is indignant about Five’s tattoo, citing his age. This whole episode has a ridiculous amount of irony. +1

Agnes draws the umbrella tattoo a bit too perfectly for someone who only saw it once and at the wrong angle. +1

Diego straight up threatens Luther at knifepoint. +1

This family meeting is a complete shitshow. +1

The monocle is likely to become a s2 plotpoint because Diego put it in a place where anyone could take it. If you’ve read the comics, you know why I think that’s important, but I won’t spoil it for anyone who hasn’t. Either way, that was a dumb way to dispose of the monocle, Diego. +1

Diego is a dick to Vanya until she agrees with him. +1

They are legitimately talking about killing their mother. What the fuck. +1

Klaus references the van when only Luther, Five, and presumably Ben know about it. This makes no sense. +1

Votes to kill Mom: Luther, Allison, Ben +3

Klaus hisses at Ben and no one thinks this is weird. +1

Grace definitely heard Luther and Allison voting to kill her. After she made them breakfast too! Luther and Allison are dicks in this scene. (And so is Ben but Grace couldn’t hear him.) +2

Grace tries to prove her worth by making cookies. Fuck Luther, Allison, and Ben for voting to turn her off. +3

Diego and Vanya actually have a civil conversation. Well done for doing the bare minimum, Diego? -1

Vanya’s pills suggest that she was friendlier with Diego at some point. +1

Pogo for sure saw that whole thing and he saw Vanya take the pills. Dr. Complicit. +1

Reginald is a total soccer mom in Diego’s flashback scenes. This amuses me. -1

However, Reginald raised six child soldiers as “crime deterrents” so +6

Luther is casually working out in his bedroom while the mission alarm is going off. +1

“Where’s my knives” was a phrase Diego practiced. Also, Diego would never lose his knives. +1

Vanya’s room is a fucking closet. +1

“Thank you, Mother” Dante Albidone is a treasure. -1

“Boys will be boys” this is the only time that phrase is acceptable. When you’re putting out a fire your son caused for no reason. -1

“You did it! I’m so proud of you!” -1

Reginald interrupts this. +2

Diego’s flashbacks were very unorganized, which makes sense. This is probably several years worth of mission flashbacks. -1

“It’s okay if you hated him” “I would understand if you wanted to hurt him”-2

David Castaneda and Jordan Claire Robbins nailed this scene. Two kick ass actors being incredible. -1

Did Five really sit there all day with no breaks? +1

Five is arguing with Dolores and losing. She is a manifestation of his subconscious. And she is winning this argument. +1

Aidan Gallagher looked directly into the camera. We made eye contact. It was weird. +1

Lance straight up sells those illegal prosthetics where anyone could see it. Lance is an idiot. +1

Agnes’s drawing led Hazel and Cha Cha to the Academy. +1

Cha Cha left the window down in the car. +1

Would that air thing actually work? If it wouldn’t then sin on Reggie for getting cheap locks. If it would, sin on me for not getting better locks sooner. +1

Hazel and Cha Cha don’t have their masks on. What if somebody saw them? +1

The portrait of Five comes back to bite the Academy in the ass. Why haven’t they gotten rid of it? Five has been back for three days. +1

Klaus has black nail polish on his toes. -1

No way in hell is Klaus able to have his eyes open in a soapy bathtub. +1

The ghosts are creepy. Sin because Klaus is traumatized. +1

“We’re Through” by the Hollies is one of my favorite songs to play on guitar. It’s a decent coffee shop piece and I like playing it live. Thank you show, for helping me discover it. -1

Klaus is taking a bath with the door open. +1

Luther has been eating his Wheaties, Cha Cha. If you call experimental ape drugs, Wheaties. +1

Luther describing sunrise on the moon. I like this bit of writing. -1

Where were Hazel and Cha Cha keeping their guns and masks? Special pockets? +1

Diego is the only person who could possibly bring knives to a gun fight and win. Diego is a badass. -1

Hazel and Cha Cha continue to have stormtrooper aim. There are so many times when either could have shot Diego, but magically miss because Diego has plot armor. +1

Reginald’s portrait gets shot though. Right in some lethal areas. This amuses me. -1

Grace is so out of it she doesn’t notice heavy gunfire. Reggie, you suck. +1

“Who the hell are these guys?”/”Who the hell are these people?” +1

Diego, Luther and Allison just saved your ass. Less arguing, more fighting the crazy people. +1

Reggie keeps convenient weapons everywhere like they’re lamps. +1

Vanya is still in the Academy hours after the meeting, and she doesn’t think to hide during all this crazy gunfire and fighting. Sigh. +1

Seriously, it’s like she’s trying to get killed. +1

But she doesn’t because she has plot armor. +1

“Hey, asshole” goes back to Five’s “hey, assholes” from episode one. So did Luther learn that from Five, did Five learn that from Luther, or did Reggie decide that that was an acceptable phrase to teach his children? I lowkey want to write all three in a crackfic. Nice. -1

Vanya probably has a concussion. Otherwise, she would have attempted to run, right? Please tell me she isn’t that stupid. +1

You know that b99 meme where shit is going down and Gina is just chilling with her headphones. Yeah. That. Klaus, get some situational awareness, please. Also, what are these magic noise cancelling headphones that can block out the sound of gunfire and where can I buy them? +1

Allison, I understand why you don’t want to rumor anyone, but your life is literally in danger. I think you can forgive yourself if you rumor Hazel and Cha Cha into not killing you and your family. +1

“You wanna rumor this psycho?” “I don’t need to because this bitch just pissed me off” These are both horrible lines. I can’t tell if it’s because of the writers or because of the actors, but both of these lines are genuinely terrible. +1

“We just want the boy”. Nice comics reference, Cha Cha. -1

Diego doesn’t attempt to fight Cha Cha and give Allison the upper hand. He just sort of stands there. What the hell, Diego? +1

And when he does fight her, he doesn’t use any long range weapons. Diego, this is your house. I’m assuming you know where the knife drawer is? +1

Ben attempts to give Klaus privacy. In this situation. That’s a sin. I would risk seeing my brother’s naked body if it meant he wouldn’t be shot. Just sayin’, Ben. Get all up in his face. Put your ghost hands through his head. Get his attention! +1

Luther and Hazel can go hand to hand as equals and the show never addresses why. +1

Vanya really is that stupid. There are plenty of doors. And the fire escape from Five’s room. Vanya, run!+1

Luther had plenty of time to get out of the way of the chandaller. Why didn’t he shove his siblings and follow one of them? The motion would have made sense. +1

This ape reveal makes no sense. It would have worked in episode one, but it’s weird in episode 3. Why didn’t they reveal this to the audience earlier? +1

The dinosaur footprint sound effect. +1

Why didn’t Vanya and Allison hear Grace humming? Also, why didn’t anyone hear Hazel and Cha Cha breaking in. It was established in episode one that there is no soundproofing. +1

Grace is cross stitching the moon exploding. Foreshadowing. -1

She is pulling the needle through her own hand though. +1

Who gave Grace that nice bracelet? That’s so adorable. -1

Diego killed his own mother. +1

However, it is a mercy kill. Who knows what Luther or Allison would have done to her if they had found out how screwed up Grace was. I’m really conflicted about this scene. On one hand, fridging, on the other, it makes sense. Therefore, it’s a wash. -1

What is this magic cloth that Allison gives Vanya to mop up the blood and where can I get it? Seriously, it cleans up blood ridiculously well. To the point where it doesn’t look like Vanya’s been injured. +1

Diego takes out his anger/sadness/frustration on Vanya. Also, Diego would be excellent at cinema sins. Vanya could have been killed and she was stupid to stay, but there is no reason to raise your voice at her like that, Diego. +1

“She is a liability”. And you are an asshole. Diego just said that line to Allison as if Vanya wasn’t even there. As if she was just some inanimate burden. Fuck Diego for this line. +1

Allison doesn’t even attempt to defend Vanya. Even if Diego made a good point, there is no reason to let him get away with that kind of emotional abuse. +1

The show kind of addresses Luther’s body image issues, but doesn’t let him talk about it. +1

When did Vanya get Leonard’s address? +1

“I didn’t know where else to go”. Home perhaps? To your apartment? And not into the arms of creepy Leonard? +1

Hazel and Cha Cha didn’t discuss what to do if shit went sideways. No wonder Five was better than them. +1

When would Hazel have kidnaped Klaus? We don’t see it happen so we should just assume that Klaus appeared there magically? +1

Hazel and Cha Cha have FRC 891 as a licence plate. Neverending Chaos. Google FRC 891 Umbrella Academy. -1

Overall Review:

I forgot just how important episode three really is. Here we learn just how harmful Vanya’s book was, that Vanya is in an orchestra, and more about Leonard. This episode carves out who Vanya is as a character before Leonard sinks his claws into her. We can see the effects of the pills on her ability to connect with others and her ability to play the violin. 

We also get a lot from the other characters. The Claire reveal is a big one for Allison. So is the ape reveal for Luther, even if it should have happened two episodes ago. 

As for acting shout outs, Emmy Raver-Lampman and Jordan Claire Robbins killed it in this episode. I can’t wait to see more of Emmy in s2 and I really hope that Jordan will return. 

There was some excellent use of irony in this episode. Like a lot of irony. What killed me was the Griddy’s scene. Hazel and Cha Cha pretending to care about Five’s well being so they can murder him and Agnes being indignant about someone as young as Five getting a tattoo is just amazing. 

As for plot things, this was really a Vanya-centric episode. It establishes a lot of things about her, which makes the twist at the end even more obvious. This is not my first, second, or even third rewatch, so I know what’s coming, but how did I not see it before? When I first watched it I thought that Five was the main character and that Vanya was a self-insert. Looking back, I can see that Five and Vanya had pretty equal backstory and screen time given to them. You could make the argument that they are the main characters. You could even argue that they’re the primary protagonist and antagonist, but to be frank, that discussion should be saved for episode 10. 

Total: 133

Sentence: Eating a dumpster bagel. 

[gone-to-fight-the-fairies]

Dirty Work Part 3

Series Summary: After joining the BMoL with Sam and Dean, the reader and Ketch are paired to track down the vampires who attacked the British bunker.

A/N: Thank you guys for being patient while I worked on the third installment. It's also given me a chance to outline and write a good portion of part 4 done, so that'll be coming soon. Also thanks to @room-with-a-cat for an idea for a Ketch-related insult. And anyone who wants to can still add to the taglist(which is below the cut) for part 4. Enjoy.

Pairing: Arthur Ketch x Reader

Word Count: 2514

Part 1, Part 2

"I'm glad to hear it."

The short phrase coaxed over in your mind. You struggled for any differentiating meaning for the five words other than the obvious; that Ketch liked that you were single. Which meant, he was developing some version of feelings towards you.

It was the most authentic conversation either of you'd had with one another. You were both equally equipped with wit and ability to ridicule the other. But was Arthur Ketch truly able to show sincerity?

Your doubt made you retract yourself, instantly allowing the vehicle to overflow with awkward silence the second Ketch alluded to having an interest in you. Ketch too resorted to silence, having felt he'd said too much. As the car filled with tension, the weather turned. Dark clouds replaced the clear morning sky, illuminating rain to come as though to emphasize on what had occurred.

"Did the forecast predict rain?" Ketch muttered behind the wheel, squinting up at the sky curiously.

Your lips didn't part for a reply. You didn't know what to say for the remaining time in the car. You couldn't help but internally dispute Ketch's statement because for the time you'd know him, he'd always had a wisecrack. And just days ago Ketch was the enemy.

But he was the man who'd carried you out of the vampire liar in his arms while you were injured and unconscious. He'd rushed you to the hospital, only changing course because you requested so, then insisted on bandages up the holes that had turned to deep tears in your skin. Now you were stuck in a car debating truth to his alleged affections.

With this angle in mind, you felt Ketch's statement was authentic. But, you didn't want him to like you because you were a damsel in distress. And you declined any reciprocating feelings, for your own sake. Mentally squashing down any romantic appeals you saw in Ketch. Maybe he was willing to become vulnerable, but you weren't. You weren't going to swoon because you felt he liked you for all the wrong reasons.

The ball was in your court, and you very much wanted to toss it out the window. It was a tug and pull with Ketch, neither of you ever showing vulnerability. Masking emotions over with sarcasm and wit. Nothing expositorily real. But his statement threw you for a loop and all you could think about was getting out of this car.

The remainder of the driver mirrored that moment, minus Ketch's occasional frustration bursts against drivers on the road. Claiming, under his breath, how driving on the other side of the road was more efficient, and that American drivers couldn't properly drive. You knew better thatn to make additional comments.

After what felt like many more hours, Ketch parked the Mustang out front of the bunker, but the rain began to pour down, pelting the paved path to the building. You fought a sigh of relief, hoping to put much distance between yourself and the Brit.

Before you opened the door to run out to the bunker, Ketch stopped you. "Wait here."

Ketch hurried out of his seat, swiftly opening the back to grab your duffle bag and an umbrella before walking around to your door, popping open the black umbrella in his grip. He held it over the door as you helped yourself out, keeping you completely dry.

"Thanks," you muttered, keeping any teasing thoughts to yourself as you huddle close to Ketch to remain underneath the umbrella.

"It'd be ill-advised to get your bandage wet," he provided, feeling the need to give an excuse to be a gentleman. "How is your neck feeling?"

You blinked a couple of times, wondering if Ketch wasn’t mad. "It's better, thank you."

When Ketch led you indoors, you quickly detached yourself from the Brit, attempting to make way to your room.

"Oh good, you're back," Mick called out from the other end of the hallway, abandoning what he was doing to meet up with you and Ketch. "Ketch, I was just about to call you."

Ketch frowned, instantly suspicious of his superior's involvement. "I already texted you that it was a successful mission."

"With a minor complication," Mick went on, eyes draping over you. "Are you quite alright? Ketch mentioned something about a bite." You watched his eyes drift over your neck, straining for a peek underneath your hair.

"I'm almost as good as new," you stretched the truth, trying to ignore the exhaustion, though, from the corner of your eye, you saw Ketch give you almost what could be considered a concerned glance. "I just need some rest, and I should be good by morning."

"Well," Mick began, "If that's true, I could use someone to check out a shapeshifter lead in Omaha."

Ketch was quick to step in. "I can handle that," Ketch assured, taking a step closure to Mick as though to block you from Mick. "I'm sure Y/N here would appreciate at least a day's rest after the events of last night."

You squinted in annoyance, feeling a complex of bottled up emotions from the day surface. "I don't need time off, and I really don't need some guy who I've worked one mission with deciding what I can and can't handle. No matter what you feel Ketch, I'm not your claim!" You turned to Mick, ignoring Ketch, "Text me the details. I'll go first thing in the morning," you led off, turning down the hallway toward your room for some well-deserved sleep.

Mick eyed Ketch curiously, "Eventful mission?"  

Ketch watched you storm down the hall until you were out of his view before he glowering down at Mick. "The girl almost died, and you're sending her into another case-"

"She's a professional, Ketch. And might I add, maybe you should act as one too."

"What is that suppose to mean?"

Mick gave Ketch a knowing look. "Don't go falling in love with the girl, like you had with Toni. Makes for messy business, but you know that better than anyone."

Ketch's frown remained on his face. "What does that have to do with your irrational decision?"

"If it were you in her shoes, would you wait a day to go onto another hunt? Especially if the opposite sex told you not to?"

Ketch threw a nasty scowl at Mick, before turning down the opposite direction of the hallway. Ketch knew Mick had a point, but felt another thought lingering in his throat. Ketch stopped abruptly, turning his head in Mick's direction. "She's not Toni," before continuing down the hall.  

The moment your head connected to your pillow, you were fast asleep, disregarding the need to replace your bandage. Sleeping through the remainder of that day, you beat the sun the following morning, perfect for beginning a new hunt. The blood loss put a damper on your sleeping schedule but allowed you ample ability to leave first thing.

Walking down the bunker hall, you carried the same duffle bag from the last hunt, filled with the remainder of your clean clothes, heading toward your Mustang where Ketch parked it the previous day. You felt well enough to complete the mission, but maybe that was pure stubbornness to prove to Ketch that you didn't always need help.

Met with an unfavored sight when you stepped out the bunker entrance, you felt your blood begin to boil. Ketch leaned against the driver's door of your car, decked out in a rich black suit, matching the car and the early morning sky.

"Sleep well?" Ketch asked as you confrontationally approached him.

"Did you and my car coordinate or was it a spur of the moment thing?" You sneered.

"How's your neck?" Ketch ignored your sarcasm, holding tightly onto his sincerity.

You, however, felt none. "What's your damage, Ketchup?"

His head shook of slight astonishment. "What did you call me?"

"You just don't get it. There's another hunt, another creature out there hurting people. I don't have time for this. Now get your shepherd's pie eating ass off my car!"

"I am not stopping you.” His tone began to change into the monotone one he used as a cover. "I am merely offering my services-"

You snorted. "This isn't a sperm bank, none of your services are needed. I'm not looking for a British baby daddy."

Ketch rose from his semi-relaxed position against the door, peeling himself from the vehicle. He glowered down at you with what you believed was disdain. "I fail to see a reason for your aggression towards me. What could have I possibly done to offend you while saving your ass twice now? Is this about me defending you yesterday because I was trying to protect you?" He sneered.

"No. Look, I know you made your feeling obvious, but I can't think about that right now, there's a case. So, if you could move I would very much appreciate it."

Ketch's eyes fell with disappointment, but quickly he covered the emotion with more anger. "I thought what I'd said maybe changed how you thought of me, how foolish of me to believe that you could consider me as anything other than a thorn in your side, despite the number of times I've come to your rescue. Forget I ever said anything."

"Ketch," you began, realizing you'd offended him, but Ketch raised a hand, motioning you to stop before turning back and disappearing inside the bunker.

But you knew you were right about one thing, you needed to get out on the road.

You hit an invisible roadblock during your second hour of driving. The sun had finished breaking dawn, and you had time to contemplate the events of the last thirty-six hours. And after everything you and Ketch had been through together, you realized you needed to formally apologize. After stewing for two hours, it sunk in how cruel you'd been. If it'd been one of the Winchesters in his position, you'd carve out the girl's heart.

Not to mention, you were growing weary, a slight side-effect from the previous blood loss and the constant ache in your neck.

You pulled off the highway and into a diner parking lot, figuring you could kill two birds with one stone. Seated at a booth, you gripped your phone in your hands for a solid minute, working up the courage to admit defeat.

Maybe he did want to help, or maybe he genuinely wanted to spend time with you. Sure the overprotectiveness had pissed you off yesterday, but you were trying to understand that Ketch meant well. And that the arrogant man actually had feelings.

You felt stumped over what to say. 'Hey, Ketch. Sorry, I was such a bitch, I'm just not used to men trying to tell me what I should do. Or handing me my ass.'

But that wasn't entirely true. Usually, if something had gone wrong on a hunt with the Winchesters, they'd force you to stay at their bunker far longer than you needed to make sure you were all healed before the next hunt. You just didn't like it when it was Ketch telling you what to do.

But you didn't consider Ketch family. He was just a man, a strange one at that. One who openly enjoyed the kill, and worked for a not-so-secret organization that was basically a rogue Hogwarts. But you realized that this man was more than his cold exterior; he had genuine feelings towards you. And he seemed to semi-care about your well-being. That scared you. But you couldn't tell Ketch that because that would render you completely vulnerable.

"Can't say I'm surprised." His voice reverberated through the phone.

"Sarcasm aside," you swallowed your pride. "I'm sorry about earlier. I was harsh. And look, I'm already a little tired, so I don't know how my stamina will be with the hunt, so would you mind?"

"Mind what?" You heard the smirk through the phone.

You took a deep breath, finding the irony that when you wanted to have a serious conversation, it's Ketch's turn to tease. "Don't make me say it."

"Well, since you mentioned it, a formal beg may be in order."

You rolled your eyes, wishing Ketch could see your annoyance in hopes that he'd stop. "Ketch, I could use your help on this case. Will you please drive up?"

The call ended, and you glared down at the device. "Asshole."

"You wouldn't want me to drive back now, would you?" Ketch's voice came from the side. Your eyes snapped up to see Ketch walking a prideful stride to your booth.

"Seriously, you tailed me?"

"I knew you'd come to your senses," he answered, sliding into the booth while eyeing you keenly, "besides, I'm wondering what the third time saving your rear will earn me."

You bite back your tongue for both of your sakes as the waitress came to take your order.

You drove separately the rest of the way to Omaha. Ketch had driven up on his motorcycle since you already carried enough equipment in the back of your vehicle. Even though shapeshifters were difficult to exterminate, luckily they only needed one thing to put them down. Silver.

When approaching the Nebraskan city, Ketch sped up ahead of you, leading you to a hotel he'd previously booked.

"Hey," you greeted in the parking lot. "If the hunt's going to be as simple as you say, then why are we getting hotel rooms?"

Ketch shrugged. "Safety net in case this takes longer than expected. Besides, it doesn't hurt to splurge a bit, since it's all included with the gig. Though, it is a shame we'll be in separate rooms," he winked before carrying both of your bags towards the lobby, leaving you behind to soak in his flirtation. You could only deny the butterflies in your stomach for so long.

Tagging: @quixoticcat, @blasted-with-salt, @deaths-maiden,

@em-isnotavampire, @wayward-mirage, @justafangirlinaspnworld-blog, @bananyaaa, @lumenella, @clueless-gold, @omgcupquak3stuff, @emmamikaelson95, @yumes-art, @wanderlust-querencia, @sjt2510, @fairytale07

If you wanted to be on this taglist let me know and I’ll add you, if you see your name but weren’t notified, that’s on tumblr’s.