#not *just* an excuse to look at pretty pictures -- for science!

[tamoscringecorner]

FiddleStan headcanons! (HORRAY NO MORE TOXIC OLD MAN YAOI!!)

-Fidds is the one who cuts Stan's hair and generally takes care of it and Stan in general

-Stan owns one of those cheesy "kiss the cook" apron's and each time he is cooking he jestures to it saying "food ain't free ya know, pay up, honey" with a smug look on his face and much go his surprise after Fidds had a quick laugh at his boyfriend's stupid yet adorable antics he'd do so

-Stan is the one who makes breakfast and when he does so he always cuts the eggs into hearts or drizzles the syrup to say "morning Fidds" on it

-Fidds adores saying cringe nerdy science pick up lines like "are you a pile of bones? Because i dig you!" Or "my love for you is like pi, never ending!"

-As a response Stan would say something back like "Damn baby, are you a parking ticket? Cuz you've got fine written all over you" and they would go back and forth till they were dying of laughter and one managed to it fluster the other

-They sometimes tease each other with playful insults like "country bumpkin" or "city rat"

-Stan always insists on Fidds wearing his clothes because frankly he finds it concerning how many years he spent in just overalls and a hat

-Every year they celebrate the day Stan opened the mystery shack and when Fidds recovered from his insanity

-Fidds is making Stan cut back his drinking and smoking and so far he has made good prgress

-If they are walking outside and it's 0 or just -1 Stan will offer his coat and if he refuses then he pulls him closer and makes some lame excuse like "this is just to make sure ya don't freeze yer ass out here, idiot.."

-Stan likes to flex on Fidds by lifting a table for example with Fidds then casually picking him up with one arm while he is reading without a care in the world

-Fidds owns a yt channel with him posting lovey songs he made for Stan and Stan sometimes helps with the melody of the banjo or being a guest and singing along with him providing lyrics

-At first Stan hated or pretended to hate it when Fidds would call him "pretty boy but now he just blushes and says "really..?"

-Fidds sometime relapses and has meltdowns whenever he sees something from his such as a picture of his son or old newspapers with him in it and would just disappear for a couple of days

-When Fidds would return to his senses he would be rather embarrassed of his behavior but Stan would always be there to comfort him

-Stan sometimes due to PTSD wakes up in the middle of the might shaking and sobbing from nightmares, each time this happens Fidds is next to him and spends the whole night if needed to comfort him

-Stanley's greatest fear is messing things up with his new family and his bf

-Fiddleford's greatest fear is losing his memory and losing and forgetting Stanley like he did with so many others

Like what ya read? Welp don't worry! There is more coming soon depending on how this post does!

[distracted-and-diffused]

Could the Cat King be partially-colorblind?

All of the debate about Edwin's eye color had me thinking: the Cat King has cat-shaped eyes. Cats are generally understood to be red-green colorblind. (They can distinguish yellows and blues pretty easily, but not reds and greens.)

What if the Cat King is red-green colorblind?

And then I did a little bit of research and found that it really wouldn't change much.

The deep yellow and old gold tones that the Cat King favors in his wardrobe would likely be really appealing to him; these colors might pop for him in a way that other saturated colors wouldn't.

And it strangely wouldn't make that much of a difference in his perception of Edwin's eye color; Edwin's irises would still look like a blue background with gold flecks (if slightly more muted), which the Cat King would understand from experience that most humans would interpret as green:

It does mean that "emerald eyes" would likely be a poetic turn of phrase, designed to appeal to Edwin more than as a description of how the Cat King sees them. If he were doing an actual, direct comparison, he would probably find that Edwin's eyes are much prettier than cut emeralds:

For color comparisons I used the DaltonLens colorblindness simulator, using the Brettel 1997 method for deuteranopia. Cat King costumes from this Tudum interview (images there courtesy of Kelli Dunsmore). George Rexstrew's right eye from his headshot photo. Emeralds from the Wikipedia article.

Inspiration for this post thanks in part to the Cat King's tiger-striped sequined jacket and Fenell et al. (2019), which I will forever think of as the "green tiger study".

[chosove]

18+ mdni | touch starved toji :(

an. lowk made toji a gooner😭

pairing: toji fushiguro x f!reader

single-dad toji, who doesn’t have any time between balancing work and being the father of two fussy kids to find a date- but luckily does have enough time to find a babysitter. it was on a complete whim, all his friends had been telling him hes getting soft (in more ways than one- but the dadbod was definitely a positive if the way he was ogled in the snack aisle at grocery stores was anything to go off of), that he needed some good ol’ camping with the guys to get back that natural edge he was always praised for in his glory days.

of course he wanted some time for himself, but what was he supposed to do? let just anybody around his kids? he spent way too long changing his own vocabulary and dietary habits to have some stranger come in and ruin all his hard work. he didnt start saying ‘gosh darnit’ and swapping out soda for juice (still working on the sugar stuff- its an upgrade tho!) to have some rando spend a couple nights undoing all that effort.

this was all that was running through toji’s head as he did his weekly grocery trip, making sure to get gumi’s flinstone gummies and tsumiki’s special request for “dunno dad just get cute barettes its not rocket science”. as he browsed what he thought were barette’s (they were not btw- they were headbands and he was losing hope), he saw you, giggling at how out of place he looked in the aisle.

“somethin’ the problem? a man cant look at cute shit like…detanglers?”

at the gruff voice your cheeks slowly tinted, shaking your head and ensuring you just thought it was cute and wanted to know if he needed any help. after letting you know tsumiki’s alleged ‘easy’ ask, you were bursting at the seams looking for all types of pretty accessories for his daughter, excitedly showing him the different varieties.

in the end he’d just picked a random one from your pile, but also made sure to get your number- as a potential babysitter of course! and just to be safe you weren’t like, a weirdo or anything, he also took you to dinner to get to know you- for the kids wellbeing! he couldnt have some creep around them. and when you sent him little smiley faces along with selfies of you throughout the day, of course he saved them- only if you turned out to be a creep and he had to show what you looked like to authorities. he slowly ran out of excuses when he started to open up his folder of your pics late at night though, always going back go that pretty picture of you with rosy cheeks from the chilly weather, the sight of your pouting lips enough to make his dick twitch.

god, he was such a creep. you were so sweet to watch the kids for two nights while he finally got some man time, sending him a video of the kids in bed with you retreating to his. you innocently smiled at the camera, tucked in and giving the camera a quick peck before waving goodbye. it was just so adorable, why’d he have to ruin it by fisting his cock to the thought of you choking on his dick every night he was gone?

he thought it’d be easier to get rid of these thoughts when you stopped babysitting, but you just wouldnt stop messaging- even going as far as calling him late at night, letting him know you were just so bored and alone and couldnt sleep. you probably thought he was sick for cumming to the sound of your voice, phone in his hands as he listened to you speak about your day, browsing through the various photos you sent him that week.

“f-fuck doll…” toji’s voice groaned, the gasp you let out to his exclamation letting him know he had in fact forgotten to mute himself.

“t-toji?” you gulped, voice sounding so fucking cute saying his voice in that curious way you always did. he meant to respond, but it wouldnt change the fact you already registered what he was doing, a notification buzzing toji’s phone. “you could always l-let me help” your sweet voice spoke, a picture of your pink cotton panties soaked through with your slick, the sight of your fingers teasing your lips through the fabric enough to push toji to the edge, a whimper of your name on his tongue.

“sh-shit…made me make a mess. come by tomorrow baby, need ya to take care of me this time.”

[cosmerelists]

Cosmere Characters as Teachers

As requested by @little-cute-pink-horrible-being :)

If Cosmere characters were teachers, what would they teach & what would it be like?

1. Jasnah: History teacher

Let's just say that she has, uh, high expectations of her students.

Jasnah: Anyone can memorize facts and dates. Jasnah: You all will do that, of course, but you will also learn to draw conclusions from those facts, track historical trends, and maybe, if you work hard, you can come up with a theory of your very own. Bravest student: Uh, miss? We are seven. Jasnah: I do not tolerate excuses.

2. Hammond: Philosophy Professor

He has a hardcore group of students who are huge fans of his.

Student 1: Hey, you're in Professor Hammond's class? Student 2: Yeah. Student 1: Isn't he the guy who wrote that book So What if the Poor are Genetically Destined to be Poor? Revolution is Still the Answer? Student 2: That's him. Student 1: And that's why your an anarchist now, huh? Student 2: Listen, he's pretty persuasive.

3. Elend: Political Science Professor

Elend, a Political Science professor at a university, is the sort of teacher who assigns a LOT of reading.

Elend: Remember: politics is for people. Even when the people you serve suck. A lot. Student: You...sound like you're talking from experience? Elend: You have no idea.

4. Shallan: Art Professor

She mainly teaches drawing and painting classes.

Shallan: You all need to decide what your art means to you. Shallan: Whether it be capturing a moment or representing a person's essence or seeing into realms not normally discernable to human eyes--as long as it's art from your soul, it will be right. Student: What, uh, was that last part? Shallan: Art should be from your soul? Student: N-No, the part before that? Shallan: Anyway, everyone start drawing!

5. Painter: Also an Art Professor

I mean, it's literally his name.

Painter: The key to art is repetition. Painter: When a Nightmare is staring down at you, you don't want to be hesitating over what to draw! Student: Professor Nikaro, please, we've been drawing bamboo for a week! Painter: ...I'm not sure what the issue is?

6. Sigzil: Science teacher

Sigzil is one of those general science teachers you get in middle school.

Sigzil: Remember: the key to science is...? Students, as a chorus: Writing things down! Sigzil: That's right! Sigzil: Now let's see what's the heaviest thing we can stick to the wall using glue--last year we managed to stick me to the wall for a couple seconds! Students: [cheering] Sigzil: ...I'm better at this than I would have expected.

7. Wayne: Theater Teacher

Wayne teaches theatre at a high school.

Wayne: Acting is all about not acting. Wayne: You gotta just be the person. Wayne: Understand their past, embody their present... Student: ...wear their hat? Wayne: Exactly!

8. Kaladin: Also a Theatre Teacher

Look me in the eyes and tell me that Kaladin doesn't understand drama.

Kaladin: [talking to an school administrator off to the side while the class watches] And you can tell the school board that the next time they want to cut funding to the arts, I will be there. Kaladin: I will be there at every meeting where even a word of funding reduction is breathed. Kaladin: I will haunt those meetings, carrying pictures of my kids doing their plays and being happy. Kaladin: And I will make them look me in the eyes if they dare to vote to take that away! New student, hesitantly: Performance art? Student: Nah, he always talks that way.

9. Sarene: English teacher

If only because I don't think they have dedicated fencing professors at most places.

Sarene: English is not simply about reading books--it is about learning to think and interpret information. Sarene: You can take the skills you learn in this class and apply them very widely: to understand the news, to read between the lines of what a person says to you, to craft effective rhetoric to get your own way. Sarene: Read everything. Sarene: Remember: you cannot defeat an enemy unless you understand your enemy. Student: ...enemy? Sarene: Don't worry: you'll have enemies when you're older. Student: Yay?

10. Navani: Engineering

Navani would be an engineering professor at a college.

Navani: Your job, students, is to get this ball through that window high up on the wall. You can do it any way you want. Student: I'm immediately seeing: trebuchet. Navani [nodding sagely]: Go with your heart.

11. Pattern: Math teacher

...Listen, I'm not saying he's a good math teacher.

Student: [staring gloomily at their test] Friend: That bad, huh? Student: Mr. Pattern wrote "Mmmm delicious lies" all over it! Friend: So...you failed? Student: Yeah...

12. Raboniel: Chemistry Teacher

She may seem strict, but she actually quite likes kids.

Raboniel: ...And that, students, is how you build a very effective chemical bomb. Students: ... Raboniel: Any questions? Bravest student: Uh, miss? We are seven. Raboniel: So...basically adults, right? Wait, how fast do humans age again? Teacher's aide: [whispering frantically] Raboniel: ...I may have made an error.

[selfmessages]

Miguel O’Hara x reader | reader is referred to as ‘you’

synopsis: he masterbates to you

warnings: gn!reader, masterbation, nsfw[mdmi], sex(not actually), slightly rushed

Miguel can't remember the last time he got laid. It’s pathetic, really. With his looks and build, he could easily get sex from anyone, man or woman. Since he can remember, he’s been using his hand to get any sort of release, stroking his cock to naked bodies with no particular person in mind, but those times are few and far between.

So why? Why is he huddled in his bathroom, fisting his cock, while he has a guest in the other room?

You, of course.

You were the guest in his house, and you were the one he was masterbating to. Miguel isn’t sure when it started; it might’ve been when you first started working for him, all bright-eyed and naive, so painfully eager to work with him, so painfully eager to please him and gain his approval. You weaseled your way into his life and his mind, completely taking over his every thought. If Miguel wasn’t a man of logic and science, he would’ve thought you put a spell on him.

Seriously, what was so goddamn special about you to make him pitch a tent from being in close proximity to you? You had only moved closer to him to show him some research you thought was important, pressing your thigh and shoulder against his.

That. That was all it took for Miguel to abruptly stand up and excuse himself to the bathroom. Closing the door behind him, he ran his hands down his face, which would’ve been comical if not for the situation he was in. He looked down at his crotch, seeing his embarrassing bulge present.

Miguel let out a heavy sigh. There was no way he could wait for it to go down; it would take too long, and that would make you suspicious. Miguel shook his head in shame and quickly undid his belt buckle, pulling down his pants just enough for his semi-hard cock to spring out.

He stroked it a couple of times, letting it become fully hard. He closed his eyes and sped up his strokes, biting his lip to keep himself quiet. He tried so hard to keep his thoughts ‘clean,’ trying to revert back to his old ways of picturing faceless nude bodies, but to no avail. Every time he tried, the ‘faces’ would morph into yours. He groans, stroking his cock even faster, wanting to get this over with as soon as possible.

Unfortunately for him, his mind wanders. Images of you flash through his mind, and he can’t stop himself from thinking about how you would moan. What position would be best to take you in? Would his dick even fit in your tiny hole? How fast could he make you cum? Would you ride him? Miguel grips his cock tighter as pre-cum starts to stain his hands.

-

He’s over you and fucking you hard. You wrap your arms around his neck as he plows into you. Your back arches and your eyes roll to the back of your head. The sound of your skin slapping together and your moans fill the room. Miguel grips your thighs, pushing them forward too, so he can see his thick cock slipping in and out of your pretty hole.

You can’t help but cry out. "M-Miguel please-!!"

"Shh, don’t cry, you’re taking me so well."

All you can do is moan and mumble incoherent words. He has you completely dumb on his cock. Miguel can’t help but stare at the sight in front of him. Your fucked-out face is truly a sight to behold. Miguel pushes your thighs forward even further, completely folding you in half. He thrusts harder into you as you cry out and clench against him. His thrusts start to get sloppy. He thrusts into you a few more times and-

.

..

…

Miguel looked down at his hand. It was completely covered in his cum. He swears that was the most he’d ever cum. He looks around the bathroom and sees tiny stars dance around the room. A sharp knock on the door causes him jump. Your voice rings through the silence.

"Mr. O’Hara, are you alright in there?"

God, you were going to be the death of him.

[ganondoodle]

(oh hey, we didnt have a long rant in a while, this wasnt supposed to be so long, as per usual with me ... i looked up some refs of the botw sonau ruins since i wanted to see how to combine its design to my sonau design in my totk rewrite- and this happened ... in case this sounds too angry or aggressive, its not meant like that, im not imploding about it, its just frustrating and annoying to me)

i have a problem with pretty much every inch of totk, and theres lots of big problems, and lots of things i find absolutely bafflingly stupid decisions-

one bafflingly weird and stupid decision to me, though there are way more important ones, is the nigh complete seperation from botw sonau (zonai) design aesthetic and totk sonau design aesthetic- its so .. weird and utterly unecessary it will never stop bothering me, its one that has relatively little impact in development but huge impact on the believability of the world

you have these ancient ruins of long gone people (that imo should have stayed a mystery, since that sense of lost history you cannot grasp makes both the world more believable and real feeling and will never let you stop thinking about, if you care about that kind of stuff at least- but i talked about that in length before im sure), but whats left leaves you still with a pretty clear design aesthetic, at least in the buildings that remain (the armor less so bc it really doesnt look like anythign ancient and just doesnt really fit together)

and then you make a game around them- but ... completely redesign their aesthetic .... in a rather big contrast too, for literally NO reason, there is not a single reason to do that, not even the excuse of trying to seperate the two games in their core aesthetic (like in the case of the shiekah- though that too is stupid bc ITS A DIRECT SEQUEL- IF YOU DONT WANT TO MAKE MORE OF THAT DESIGN THEME or leave it in for that matter THATS CORE TO THE PREVIOUS GAME DONT MAKE IT A DIRECT SEQUEL YOU DUM-) can do any work here, the botw sonau ruins werent many, it was background stuff, it wasnt a main theme and it didnt carry any importance in the game itself

like, botw sonau architecture was dark stone with red highlights (a color that usually fades rather quickly, imagine how strong it had to be once, maybe it was even more colorful at some point), bird, boar and dragon carvings, torches in bird shape, alot of swirls and round patterns among the blockier rough shapes, its was pretty detailed with patterns and pictures all over it --

totk sonau? blendingly white stone, all blocky shapes like unfinished blender models, not a swirl to be found, green hologram lights (or cold white light, i dont think there are any totk sonau torches, just those weird candle things- most light sources are lamps in impeccable shape all giving off that cold white light) and gold blocky script, theres rarely alot of detail on them, the pattern most often present beign a scale pattern ... one which i dont remember appearing anywhere on the botw sonau ruins in that way/that often, the only animal motif is a dragon head every now and then and it honestly feels tacked on, like they scrambled to try and connect the two in any way shape or form, white gold and green, theres nothing red anywhere, they neither connect to the botw sonau architecture nor to the one armor set- or its description, totk sonau have nothing to do with the phirone (faron) region (aside from that one quest that could have been placed anywhere), they are weirdly modern and techy, theres nothing "barbaric", not even their clothes are in any way connected (im so sick of all that gold tbh) even their magic isnt really .. magical, it all feels like science fiction type tech stuff (even though they said they wanted it to feel magical, couldnt be further from that tbh) the design of their magic symbols dont line up with their own building aesthetic or anyone elses even, its so messy

if you do the quest to get the fith sage its even more apparent- its the direct contrast between botw and totk sonau, its like a cut into a mod, theres no overlap, you cant argue that its bc the botw ruins where exposed to the elements and thats why the color differs- the totk sonau ruins left to rot both in the underground and in the literal sky are all just as if not more exposed, yet they all remain in rather good shape, all keeping the white and often completely colorless look, most damage being just some clumps of mold (?) or something having fallen over, and if they were protected so their color didnt change? wheres the red? the colors all should be in pristine shape then but its not bc there is no color

their excuse of "uuuh the hylians build those things in honor of the sonau!!" they tried to give doesnt work, like all other excuses, if they did why the hell does it look so different? sonau stuff was all over the place, you have the blueprints right there, WHY even build it? in those regions nonetheless that were of pretty little importance as far as we know, if this were the case they should be on the forgotten plateau or around hyrule castle but they are not- ALSO if the hylians built them for them .. so after they died out .. why then is there some weird mechanism with their actual aesthetic there in the ones in phirone? if they built it while they were still there ... why make it look so different?? ADDITIONALLY hyrules style of architecture is closer to the totk sonau one than the botw sonau so you cant even say it was influenced by their own style bc botws sonau is more different than both of them

it also adds to the .. feeling of something being off about the entire game (like it felt to me even shortly after starting to play), while i dont want to touch on the stupidness of how they handled totk shrines since thats another long rant i already did before, the sudden appearance of totk sonau style stuff literally everywhere (and the disappearance of anything not plot relevant shiekah bc it just went poof according to interviews and neither that nonsensical excuse nor anything in the game making sense- bc in the end they just wanted it gone and didnt care) would seem LESS weird if it was in the style of botw sonau, you know that style, its been here the whole time and more of it appearing would seem much less jarring, even if it doing so in completely non sensical ways- it would at least lessen that weirdness

i do not get why you would do that, did your designers have nothing to do so you made them make an entirely new aesthetic? did you not want your holy perfectly goodest god king to be anything but the most clean and kingly looking so you didnt even go for the barbaric idea from botw?(which i am not a fan of either) bc of course someone supposed to fill the role of perfect example of how to be good king of holy hyrule to zelda couldnt look "primitive"? was that given to the ancient hylians instead? with their designs going, to me, rather close to a mix of native american and ancient greek aesthetic (uh oh)- to contrast them to your superior alien that brought the idiots on earth technology since we didnt have enough tired tropes in here already? thought that design theme was more sellable? simply didnt care? (tbh, most likely in my eyes given the carelesness of the game to connect in any way to botw, much less in a meaningful one)

(those where written like questions but i dont expect anyone to answers for, it just sounds better)

[cjlouwho]

Uncle Eddie- Chapter 2

Two and a Half

(read here, on ao3, or start at the beginning)

At least once a month, Eddie would come over and watch Juniper while Tommy and Buck went out on a date night.

On those days, Juniper would spend most of her time at Tommy or Buck's heels, asking when her Uncle Eddie was coming.

“You an Papa get dress!” She exclaimed, pushing at Buck's legs to try and get him to go into the bedroom.

“Juniper, it's only three,” Buck said with a laugh. He lifted her up in his arms and took her over to the old grandfather clock in the corner of the living room. It was something Tommy's dad had left him when he died. Tommy hated it, but also couldn't seem to let it go, so there it stood.

“What number is this?” Buck asked, pointing to the three on the clock.

“Tree!” She squealed.

“Right.” He moved his finger. “What number is this?”

“Five!”

“Good job!” He gave her a high five before turning back to the clock. “When this,” he said, pointing to the hour hand over the three, “gets from here to here,” going back to five, “that's when Uncle Eddie comes.”

She pursed her lips together, staring intently at the clock, as though she could get it to move with her mind. After a moment she wriggled herself out of Buck's arms. She stood in front of him, staring up at the clock. “I wait here.”

Buck smiled. He knew she wouldn't be there longer than a couple minutes. She'd get distracted with her dolls, or her toy cars, or the episode of Bluey that was about to begin.

He got his phone from his back pocket and took a quick picture, sending it to Eddie with the text:

Waiting for the clock to strike five so she can see her Uncle Eddie.

As much as Juniper looked forward to their special time together, Eddie was pretty sure he enjoyed it even more. With Christopher at college and the house feeling quieter every day, he relished the moments he got to spend with her, filled with play time, imagination, and endless laughter.

So, after seeing the text, he couldn't help it if he ended up at Buck and Tommy's place by 3:45 with the excuse that they could get ready without distraction.

He ignored Tommy's, “She's got you wrapped, man,” in favor of bending down on his knees, arms stretched wide, as Juniper ran to him as fast as her little legs would allow and launched herself into his arms.

*****

“We'll be home around nine,” Buck said as Eddie and Juniper walked him and Tommy to the door. “Junie- She's been getting into karate lately. Thinks she, uh, she can kick people in the shin and as long as there's a hi-yah attached to it it's okay.”

“We'll be fine, Buck,” Eddie assured him. He makes a mental note to buy her some boxing gloves. Never too early to start learning some techniques.

“And she has to have her yellow blankie to fall asleep or she'll scream.”

“I am not new to this, Buck,” Eddie reminded him.

Tommy placed a hand on Buck's back. “He's got it, babe. They'll be fine.”

They went through this every time. Buck was the more overprotective of the two. Always worried that some sort of danger was looming around the corner. It wasn't like Tommy could blame him, with his tendency to get seriously injured on the regular.

Tommy was slightly more laidback, although Eddie knew he was just as protective on the inside. He was simply better at hiding it.

Buck bent down to Juniper, who wrapped one arm around him while keeping the other hand latched onto Eddie's finger. “Bye, babygirl.”

“Bye, Daddy.” She patted him on the back, “Have a fun.”

Tommy bent down next. Juniper put her hands on her hips, raised an eyebrow at him. He mirrored her.

It was something they had started months ago. At random times she'd give him the look and he'd have to return it, then try to “read her mind.”

“You're thinking of... the number three!”

She shook her head, a smile washing over her face. “Two, Papa!” she shouted. It was always the number two. Every single time.

“Darn!” He looked up at Eddie. “I never get it right.”

“Being a mind reader is not an exact science. Don't beat yourself up about it.”

Tommy smiled, leaned in and gave Juniper a kiss on the cheek. “Who do you call if something bad happens?” he asked.

An eye roll. “Nine and one and one.”

“Good job!”

Tommy stood back up just in time for Juniper to turn her hand and begin shooing them out the door. “Daddy, Papa, go.”

Buck turned to Tommy. “I cannot believe our child is kicking us out of the house.”

“It's a tragedy.”

“You heard the girl,” Eddie said, waving them out the same way Juniper was. “Daddy, Papa, go!”

As soon as Buck and Tommy were out the door, Eddie looked down at Juniper.

“What's your name again?”

Juniper let out an exasperated sigh, hands back to her hips. “Chewpiner.”

Eddie snapped his fingers, “That's right. How could I forget? Mind if I call you Chewy?”

She rolled her eyes, brought her hands to her face and pushed hair back from her eyes. “Fine.”

They played this game every time Eddie came over. Although, to Juniper it was not a game at all.

If her dads were home, she'd be walking over to them right now, a very serious look on her face, and tell them, “Uncy Eddie forgot my name... again!”

To which Buck would ask dramatically, “Uncle Eddie, how could you?!”

And Tommy would add, “It's Chewpiner!”

“Let's go, Uncy Eddie!” She yelled, heading for the back door.

“I'm comin', Chewy!” Eddie followed closely behind. They always had to play pirates first. She'd been fascinated with them since she was eighteen months old, watching old episodes of Jake and the Neverland Pirates. On her second birthday, Eddie and Tommy spent the day building a pirate play set in the backyard while Buck kept her busy. Eddie will be forever grateful he recorded her as she came outside and saw it for the first time. He'll also never forget the neighbors calling the cops, thinking someone was being murdered from the sound of her excited screams.

She'd had the play set for six months now, but loved it just as much as she did on day one.

*****

After pirates was dinner. Eddie fixed peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for the both of them, along with some carrot sticks and goldfish.

When he placed the plate in front of her she looked down at it... unimpressed.

He knew this would happen. Happened every time. She always forgot that he was not a gourmet chef.

She glanced up at him. “Daddy makes ri- riso... risotto.”

“Oh does he?” He sat across from her, taking a big bite of his sandwich. “Did he also teach you the word risotto just to mess with me?”

She tilted her head to the side, scrunched up her nose. “Huh?”

He shook his head. “Nothing.” Pushed the plate closer to her. “Eat.”

Sometimes Eddie couldn't believe what a perfect combo Juniper was of her two dads. Not just her attitude, but looks as well.

Technically, she wasn't biologically Tommy's or Buck's. Eddie still remembers Buck getting that call. Everyone was at Bobby and Athena's, enjoying a barbecue dinner, when Buck excused himself from the table.

A few seconds later he returned, tapping at Tommy's shoulder and telling him they had to go.

“One week old,” he explained poorly. “Girl. Hospital. We. Us. Now.”

Everyone got the gist, tossing out congratulations as Tommy and Buck rushed out the door, then Tommy ran back in a few seconds later when he realized he forgot their keys.

Still, it was hard to believe. Her eyes were identical to Tommy's. A deep ocean blue with specks of hazel. It wasn't something Eddie would have ever noticed on his own, but once Buck showed him twenty side by side photographs, the resemblance was uncanny.

She had a birthmark on her left arm that was a near match to Buck's. Tommy had sent everyone a picture on the group chat as soon as they got to the hospital. Buck, smiling with tears pouring down his face as he held up her little arm to show the camera.

Her hair was light brown, just like both of her dads, with loose curls that clung to her head when they'd get wet.

“It's like she was made just for you guys,” Eddie said the first time he ever held her. It was an offhand comment, spoken as he stared down at the most adorable little girl he'd ever seen.

It also brought both Buck and Tommy to tears.

Buck couldn't even speak, just nodding his head in agreement.

Tommy wiped his own tears away before they could fall too far, muttering out a, “Yeah. Yeah, she was.”

*****

Dinner turned into a discussion about her dolls. She had to tell Eddie each of their names, how old they were, and apparently each of them had a whole backstory.

Eddie was pretty sure Buck was behind that one.

When dinner was cleaned up, they colored. Juniper proudly held up a drawing that was just a rainbow of colors scribbled on the paper, “For you, Uncy!”

Best. Drawing. Ever.

Afterward, they had ice cream while they watched reruns of Bluey.

That damn show always made Eddie cry.

Soon enough it was time to get ready for bed. He got Juniper cleaned up, teeth brushed, changed into pajamas, then brought her back out to the living room to brush her hair and put it in braids.

Learning to braid was quite the experience for him. Tommy and Buck were far more natural at it than he was, but he made it his mission to learn because Juniper was always asking him to braid her hair.

So he went to YouTube and watched as many videos as he could. Actually learned to french braid while he was at it, and now he was her favorite braider.

Once he was done he turned off all the lights except for one dim lamp, put Cinderella on, and she snuggled up in his lap. He tossed a blanket over her and her eyes immediately started to close as she drifted to sleep. “Wove you, Uncy Eddie,” she mumbled, her thumb coming toward her mouth but making no actual effort to put it in her mouth.

He leaned down, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “Love you too, Chewy.”

He could have turned off the movie once she was good and asleep. Could have gone and laid her in her room, turned on a basketball game, and scrolled through his phone as he waited for Tommy and Buck to get home.

He didn't though. He kept her in his arms, continued watching Cinderella, and made mental notes of different parts of the movie. He knew she'd ask him about it the next time he saw her. Even if she didn't make it through a movie, she'd remember what they had been watching, and ask Eddie his favorite parts.

*****

When Tommy and Buck got home an hour later, Juniper was still sleeping soundly in Eddie's arms.

“Hey,” Tommy greeted quietly. He smiled at the sight. Juniper lying there, mouth open wide, little snores escaping with each breath. She had a hand latched onto Eddie's shirt, her other curled up underneath the blanket. “I can take her to bed. Thanks, Eddie.”

He scooped Juniper up in his arms, Eddie only slightly reluctant to let her go.

Buck rubbed a hand down Tommy's shoulder as he passed by. “I'll be there in a minute to tuck her in.”

“M'kay, babe. We'll be waiting.”

Buck turned back to Eddie as he stood and started folding up the blanket.

“Oh, um, where's her special blankie?” Buck asked, looking around. “She'll have to have it if she wakes up.”

Eddie shrugged. “Still in her room, probably. She never asked for it.”

Buck stared at him. “You're magic. I swear to God, you're magic.”

Eddie smiled, "When you're right, you're right," he said, beginning to gather up his things and head out.

“Thank you, for tonight.”

“I've told you a million times, Buck, you don't have to thank me. I like hangin' out with my niece.”

“Yeah, she loves it too. You really are so good with her,” Buck said. “We never have to worry about her when she's with you.”

Eddie eyed him knowingly.

“I never said I didn't worry,” he corrected, “just that I didn't have to worry.”

Eddie laughed. Before leaving, he took a detour to the dining room table.

“You ever think of having another one?” Buck asked.

Eddie laughed harder. “God no,” he replied, picking up the scribbled drawing Juniper made him, “but getting to be her uncle is pretty cool.”

[hollywoodroses]

basic instinct (a dave mustaine fan fiction)

this story is not based on the film basic instinct, it’s an original story idea

“After spending the school year at a university exchange program in italy, you are invited by your housemate to spend christmas/new years with her family. When preparing for the trip home with her, she forgot to mention she had a troubled brother who would later set his sights on you.”

this is the first time I am writing about dave mustaine, please bear with me. I really hope all of you like it!

a/n: I couldn’t wait and wrote this at midnight

Warnings: heavy smut including, spit!kink and cum!eating, masturbation, language including sexual language, mention of violence, a character passes away, and cigarette smoking.

minors please do not interact

While spending the school year in a university exchange program in Italy, you became friends with your housemate who was from Los Angeles. It didn’t take her long to find out you had no family, you lost your parents in a car accident when you were 18 years old. Since you were of legal age at the time, you were considered an adult and you were forced to move out on your own.

You had spent the time in Italy while choosing whether you wanted to go to law school or nursing school after spending two years studying political science with a minor in world languages.

It was time to go back home, your housemate invited you to spend Christmas and New Years with her family. You were so excited to spend time with people as you had always felt alone. She explained she had a mother and aunts, uncles and cousins that would be there. She forgot to mention her brother Dave, well didn’t really forget. Her family doesn’t talk about him, he was a bit troubled and labeled the “bad-seed” of the family. He did petty robbery with his friends and led women on with a promise of having a sexual encounter with him. He was 22 years old and still living at home, refusing to grow up and mature.

The plane ride from Italy seemed like a lifetime, you had so much energy you spent the flight talking with your friend, more like best friend. You didn’t realize the plane was landing when you were about to take a rest from all the chatting.

You are surprised to see a taxi waiting for you, ready to take you to your friend’s house and for the party to start.

-AT HOME-

Just as your friend was about to open the front door with her house key, you noticed a figure of a young man leaning against the side of the house. A flame from a lit cigarette burning in the dark. You are curious of the mysterious man. You decided to brush off what you are thinking as you are greeted by the family you would spend time with.

You spend hours chatting with the family you are with sitting with two women looking at baby pictures of your friend. While laughing at how cute she looked as a toddler, you noticed the young man from outside was sitting on a couch opposite you. Was he checking you out? You thought to yourself, he had a soft smirk while he gazed at you. It kept you speechless and a little uneasy as you tried to ignore him while listening to the women talk about their plans for the new year.

After awhile you excused yourself to go to the washroom. When you are finished your business, open the door and are shocked to see the nameless man who was checking you out earlier. You try and scream but he covers your mouth with his hand, pushing you back into the washroom and warning you to be silent.

“What’s your name, pretty girl?” He asks.

“Y/N.” You whisper with an innocent look in your eyes.

“I’m Dave and when I saw you for the first time I knew I had to have you”.

You feel turned on and a wetness begin to form in your pussy as you heard him confess to you. You didn’t understand but you wanted him too. Licking your lips, not realizing you are temping him he kisses you gently. You open your mouth and let his tongue explore you. Feeling his hands on your chest, you break the kiss and encourage him to rip off your blouse while you take your panties off under your skirt.

You sit on the countertop, you can’t help but feel horny. You pull Dave close to you and kiss him as you begin to grind against his dick that is covered by his jeans. Breaking the kiss, you moan as you speed up your grinding feeling like you can squirt at any moment. Suddenly, Dave puts his hands on your face and whispers lovingly to you, making you stop and get back to reality. Getting a wicked idea, you wet your fingers with your mouth and proceed to finger yourself as Dave watches you with a dark look on his face. You continue to fuck yourself until you orgasm, sucking your fingers clean.

You jump off the countertop and kiss Dave one last time, or is it the last time? You couldn’t get enough of him. He smirked at you as he left the washroom before you as not to cause a scene. You turn to look at yourself in the mirror and notice your face is red and you feel a chill all over your body. You put water on your face as you wait to cool yourself down. Once you feel better, you head back to the living room where everyone is.

-BACK AT THE PARTY-

When you are finally back in your seat downstairs, you see your friend talking to Dave. She seemed upset, even going as far as losing a few tears. You swear you over hear her talking to him.

“Please leave my friend alone, you remember what happened to Daisy right? Because, I remember how fucked-up you can be!”

Thankfully her family didn’t hear her conversation, they were all on the fancy kitchen table getting ready to eat.

“Y/BFN” Her mother called her.

You look at Dave, wondering what his sister meant when she talked about this unknown girl.

You see, Daisy was a smart girl. She was the daughter of their mother’s childhood friend. Daisy got good grades and excelled in piano, she was planning to go to Juilliard to learn how to be a piano player for classical concerts but her dream was to play on Broadway. Unfortunately, this all changed when she met Dave in her senior year of high school. Daisy had just turned 18 while Dave was a high school dropout. he met Daisy at a house party and she was intrigued by him.

When Dave found out, Daisy had a school-girl crush he decided to make a move on her. This encounter caused her to get pregnant and she was forced to live with her grandparents in San Francisco. This way, she would be far away from Dave and his wild antics. The person who was hit the hardest from the loss was his sister, she was the same age as Daisy and they grew up together.

You try and have a good time at dinner and once it’s all cleaned up, the family puts on a Christmas movie. You seem uninterested and get excited as you look over at Dave. Walking up to where he is sitting, you make a silent move to grab his hand and walk him to your bedroom. You fail to notice that his sister saw the whole thing. She couldn’t say anything as you and Dave are free to make your own choices. She just hopes you won’t get damaged like Daisy did.

Once you are alone with Dave, all bets are off. You push him onto the bed and crawl on his body, sitting on his lap. You move out of the way a little and unbutton his jeans. Pulling his jeans down along with his boxers, you start to rub his dick. Slowly at first than faster. As you are doing this you feel yourself get wet. You watch Dave in awe as he closes his eyes and moans. It doesn’t take long for him to cum all over your hand. You look at him as you lick your hand clean of his juice. You can’t help of moan as you savour his taste. Rolling his cum in your mouth with your saliva, you crawl up towards him, encouraging him to open his mouth for you, you spit in his mouth as you kiss him. You and Dave spend the whole night exploring each other. Both falling asleep in sexual bliss.

Once it is morning you wake up to an empty bed. Wondering what happened to Dave, you put on his discarded t-shirt and walk downstairs to the kitchen. You find Dave’s sister with her mum, crying. Along with a newborn that was sleeping in its carrier.

“What’s going on.” You ask.

Dave’s mother sits you down at the counter and explains everything to you.

“Dave went out last night, to see Daisy. She was giving birth to his child. While at the hospital, Daisy’s brother got into a fight with him. After Dave’s daughter was born, he ran off with Daisy due to threats from her family. While getting their belongings, Daisy’s brother and his friends tracked them down and shot Dave. He died of his injuries and they took Daisy away. All we have left of him is his daughter. She was left at our door in the middle of the night”.

You are shocked to learn everything. You truly felt in love with Dave but you were just a toy in his dangerous game. A game he played with another innocent girl that cost him his life.

the end

[a-twistedheartslonging]

So! Everything I’ve learned about spooders is from my aunt Angie, and Exotic Lair on YouTube and now I’m talking about Idia!

Spiders rub their thorax with their legs to kick their little hairs at predators or enemies, they actually get irritated really quickly (no I personally haven’t had kicked hairs in my arms, but my Auntie has and we had to drive her to the hospital cause the topical ointments were causing an allergic reaction) so all I’m picturing is if you scare Idia, and his back to you he kicks his hairs at you. Make sure to knock before entering his room! Nobody makes this mistake twice…

Some tarantelas keep small frogs in a symbiotic relationship where the frog protects the spiders eggs, and the spider protects the frog, so honestly…Ortho is a frog boy. Maybe not a full frog boy but like he wears froggy outfits. He has a bucket hat with the frog eyes, and everything!

Spiders use their webs as an extended sense of touch, so as much as I want to say Idia uses his webbing for wiring and electronics, I’m worried he would electrocute himself…he probably does periodically and you and Ortho yell at him to STOP! This is the third time!

Spiders HATE blowing air and wind, so he uses it as an excuse to avoid the outdoors. « It’s so windy out though! » it actually can cause overstimulation for them, and they can get sick from too much wind! So windy days I bet he gets a bit of a fever every time. His little hairs also shake to try and calm down. He looks like he’s vibrating

So there are burrowing spiders (which are the ones I know about) and arborils (or the tree livers…) and since he prefers the indoors, he would be a burrower! Also cause then I can talk about him! Also cause he would prefer the dark, damp, and he would totally burrow into his blanket fort, and his super fluffy hoodie!

After he molts he’s SUPER pretty, as all spiders are! They’re so vibrant and bright blue. I bet Idia would be a cobalt blue tarantula, and if Ortho is a spider, I bet he would be a rose hair. Rose hairs are best for beginners, as they’re pretty docile, and just live and let live, while cobalts choose violence more often. Rose hairs also choose violence, but more as a last resort. Both kick hairs, but cobalts also bite…

So spiders teeth are actually like straws (if I’m remembering correctly) so just picture him crunching a soda can and he sucks it all down! Just a SHLURP, and he’s hydrated! But I bet he still likes the crunch of chips. (Weird asmr too look for is tarantula feeding! Don’t watch if you have a weak stomach)

Spiders don’t have bones and use more of a hydrolic system to move, with their heart pushing blood into each leg to move forward then pull it back. So I say Idia has very few bones, or none, and his human torso is highly flexible. Without his exo he would be very bendy.

Spiders have retractable claws AND PAW PADS! They only have two of each on each food, so 16 paw pads to squish! But spider pads are different from other animals, as they have tiny hairs that help them stick to things and climb. (Once scientists found web residue in spider foot prints so they were like « they stick by excreting webbing from their feet! » and another groupe was like « bet, there is webbing everywhere! How do you know they’re not trailing it like toilet paper?» and covered a spiders butt with wax to keep the environment more clean, and there was no webbing there! I love science beef) his little feet’s are still probably sticky from webbing, so use a baby wipe or something to clean him up.

Males leave their burrows to go try and see if someone wants to mate (I’m not going into how they have to carry their little sperm web bag with them, because yes they have to take the sperm and put it into basically a little bag to put in the female!) so only when he’s actually interested does he start to leave his room for you! He helps clean up ramshackle I bet! Or uses robots to help clean it…

Different breeds have different mating styles, but the peacock spider does a little dance, shaking his butt around and he’s like « please, please, please, please plea-«  or they also tap a little pattern on the females webbing to see if she’s willing,

Spiders don’t have genders until I think their third molt, and that’s just a free fun fact!

So many cute and interesting things.

I think of Ortho being a dif creature from his brother. Maybe cuz of their parents are dif creatures with one being a spider and the others something else or current or past ortho was a spider but always wanted to be something different so Idia decided to be a cool bro and make him a body that lets him be whatever he wants.

So, imagine he has all these diff creature bods. Dog, bunny, frog, bee, spooder, and whatever else.

Part of me thinks Idia helping to clean would just him picking you up under the arms like a cat and lifting you to reach things which would be so funny to see.

It would be cute if Yuu kept baby wipes with them and helped Idia keep those spider feeties clean when he needs it.

It would be pretty freaking cool Seeing Idia do the soda can thing, i feel like he would try not to do it around you at first but forgets but then you act all impressed and tell him it's cool and he's flustered.

Poor Idia on those windy days. Makes me think of that orange cat that hates the beach cuz it was windy.

He makes that face whenever it gets windy.

Hmmm the hairs though...in this AU I think of the hairs he has being soft of fluffy baby they get stiff when scared so he can do that thing, or it becomes that way cuz magic.

....I'm just picturing him doing his scared yelling while doing it and I can't stop laughing. It's just such a silly mental image and I love it.

Thank you for all the information and Ideas, I love them.

[tiramisumin]

wishes + kisses

pairing: choi hyunwoo x f!reader 𝜗𝜚 word count: 1.02k 𝜗𝜚 content: fluff, established relationship but implied f2l + mutual pining, one (1) kiss scene, that’s it afaik!!, not beta’d or proofread but  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

synopsis: in which hyunwoo thinks you forgot his birthday.

୨ৎ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR FAVORITE MAIN VOCALIST, OUR FAVORITE YAPPER, OUR FAVORITE FOX BOY!! it’s no longer his birthday in sk but it is here in the states so it counts ok… >:(

Hyunwoo has never really cared much about his birthday. 

It was just another day of the year, really. Another trip around the sun. Sure, he was grateful that he was alive and that he was brought into this world by his parents. But honestly speaking, celebrating his birthday wasn’t a big deal for him. 

Or at least, that’s how he felt until you came into his life. 

The two of you met in middle school after being partnered up in science class. You shared similar interests so it was relatively easy to become the best of friends. As you grew older, your bond only strengthened and, well, you know what they say about guys and girls being friends. It never lasts too long before one catches feelings for the other. Thankfully, however, your feelings were mutual. 

You made birthdays fun for Hyunwoo. Throughout your friendship, you’d made it a tradition to spend the whole day at the local amusement park rather than throwing some extravagant party. If his birthday fell on a random day of the week, you’d skip school. After all, it wasn’t an excuse to skip out on tradition, now was it?

This year, though, was the first birthday you’d spend together as a couple. Hyunwoo gathered the courage to ask you out a few months ago and you’d been going strong ever since. He was most excited for this birthday, because he was hoping to do what he’d been dreaming of for years now— kissing you at the top of the ferris wheel at night. 

He doesn’t exactly remember which birthday he started wishing for it, but it’s been in the back of his mind for an embarrassingly long amount of time. He can just about picture the scene in his head; you sitting on the bench across from him in the cart, the colorful lights of the amusement park painting your pretty face, the cold December air blowing through your hair, the sparkle in your eyes as he finally leans in. 

Unfortunately, he doesn’t think that’ll happen. 

He woke up that morning anticipating his phone to be blown up with the usual ‘Happy Birthday’ messages from you and his friends. When he turned over and unlocked it, that was not the case. Not a single one of his friends texted, not even Minjae, who never seemed to forget anyone’s birthday. You had sent him something, but it wasn’t what he was expecting. 

you: good morning sleepyhead! i’m hella craving pancakes rn and was wondering if u could take me to get some :P you: pretty please??? <3 

Hyunwoo doesn’t believe his eyes. In fact, he closes them and lays back down for a couple seconds just in case he’s actually making this whole scenario up. (He’s not.)

Perhaps you really did forget. You had the tendency to have a goldfish brain at times, so he wouldn’t put it past you. Although you've celebrated his birthday together for so many years now, it didn’t really make sense that you would. You looked forward to spending the day at the amusement park more than he did. 

He sighs, but doesn’t comment on it when he replies to you, instead hoping that maybe you might remember when you see him. He’s grateful that he’ll still get to see you anyways, so it’s not that much of an issue. It just stings a little. 

hyunwoo: sure  hyunwoo: i’ll be there in 10

Though, when you see him, nothing changes. You don’t tell him anything other than, “Hi, I missed you,” with a quick kiss on the cheek. You just hop into the passenger seat of his car and await your impromptu pancake date. He does think it’s a little odd that you’re so dolled up just for a trip to IHOP, but he keeps his thoughts to himself. 

Breakfast goes well and Hyunwoo thinks that’s that. You’ll go your separate ways for the day and he’ll spend his birthday all alone. But, you have other plans. 

You tell him that you left something at a friend’s house and it would be great if he would take you to retrieve it. The address you give him sounds familiar, but he doesn’t question it, handing you his phone to punch it into his navigation system. When you’re most of the way into the drive, Hyunwoo becomes confused. And when you arrive at your destination, he can’t help the surprised look on his face. 

The amusement park entrance is within view, a ‘Happy Birthday Hyunwoo’ banner hung over the welcome sign and all your friends gathered to await your arrival. You turn to him in your seat with a radiant, warm smile. “Did you really think I’d forget my favorite day of the year?”

He laughs, shaking his head slowly. “For a second there, I kinda did. How could I ever doubt you?”

You drag him out of the car towards where everyone is, the crowd surrounding him to give him different variations of the yearly wish. The rest of the day is damn near perfect, too. He learns that you all pitched in to rent out the whole park just for your group. It was nice not having to wait in long queue lines for the rides. 

To put icing on the cake, his favorite part of the day is just as special. It was a little colder than it usually is this time of year, so you sat on Hyunwoo’s side of the ferris wheel cart, cuddled up to his arm for warmth. You look even prettier up close. 

“I had a really good time today, Y/N. Thank you.” He says, wrapping an arm around you. 

“You deserve nothing short of perfection.” You respond, leaning further into him. 

He reciprocates, brushing his nose against yours as a silent ask for permission. Rather than answering verbally, you minimize the small gap between you, connecting your lips in a soft, sweet kiss. Imaginary fireworks explode in the sky around you and the stars twinkle just a bit brighter. 

“Happy birthday, Hyunwoo.”

Staring at your slightly kiss-swollen lips and awestruck gaze has him thinking this is the best birthday ever. 

© 𝒕𝒊𝒓𝒂𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒊𝒏.

[artsyannierose]

Nene’s Dead Corpse and her ghost bf

randomly made a crap ton more sense to me

why?

fricking school (screw school I hate you (no not rly I’m just stressed))

Anyway I’m a biomed class where unit 1 is studying medical investigations forensic science style

and one of the things is like, what happens to a person after the body has been dead for a while (post mortem or sum, see im learning :D)

Things like algor mortis, livor mortis, I’ve heard of. In fact I’ve even studied the clouding of the corneas before, but it never got to me till today

maybe it’s cause I cannot for the life of me study forensics without my wild imagination giving me nightmares or just panicking when I’m alone but aNyWays

I tend to imagine characters associated with death in these scenarios so I don’t lose it in class💀

*cough* Nene *cough cough*

So as I was taking notes on the slideshow, some of the images of clouded corneas reminded me strangely of something familiar, but at that point I couldn’t tell. There’s something haunting about the eyes (or maybe it’s just my over-analytical brain loving small details like this) they’re GORGEOUS

LIKE

IDK THEYRE PRETTY

Maybe it’s ‘cause the true color of the iris is completely visible in all its glory, without the pupil obscuring it

(something like this?? A little vivid tho lol)

but like

there’s no

life

no reflection, no emotion…nothing (which is so hauntingly beautiful leave me alone I’m a sucker for this now)

it’s literally just an eye with nothing but color

and then it hit me…it’s exactly the look Nene had when Mirai fast-forwarded her time

you can see in the image it’s just her plain magenta eyes with a fuzzy de-saturated blob in the center…aka clouded corneas

And that honestly made me realize that in this scene she’s not—she’s not even unconscious

No she’s literally, physiologically dead

THAT IS A CORPSE HE IS HOLDING

she is literally a dead body this hits me so hard😭😭

and I can imagine algor mortis kicked in by then, her body was probably cold to the touch

so imagine how he felt, and I’m aware people have analyzed his emotions but just think about it

he’s always seen her so full of life and hope, and now all he has left is an empty shell of her, cold and dead with no life left inside

…just like him

the more I think about it Hanako is just an animated corpse

he has no reflection in his eyes most of the time because he is ✨dead✨

I mean Mei, Mitsuba, and Hanako don’t have a little white reflection dot like Nene and Kou

Or maybe I’m overthinking it and Nene’s eyes are just super reflective

even for someone who presumably took his own life, he probably never saw tsukasa’s body start postmortem and actually feel dead bc it looked extremely bloody ngl (I’m guessing he killed himself right after 💔)

and now he’s holding someone he cares about like this for the first time and I’ll bet that scarred him

and he figured out that never, never ever did he ever want to see his sweet assistant like this again, lifeless in his arms

and so after that, cue Hanako in his villain era who basically became a yandere the entire picture perfect lmao

and he was unbelievably adamant about it too

I mean honestly if I held anybody I knew lifeless like that I’d be scarred for life and crying for days

seeing the light drained from someone’s eyes is so interestingly sad to me

Look at the difference:

Happy

vs Sad/Determined

vs Depressed (ig??)

vs Dead

She still has so much emotion in her eyes

and then d e a d

literally looks like a porcelain doll

wait she looks so pale in the last image compared to the others now that I think about it

I love aidairo’s eye for detail it’s so fun to figure out

Well anyways thanks for coming to my Ted Talk essay atp-

IT’S PAST 1 AM AND I SHOULD BE STUDYING FOR SAID BIOMED CLASS AND HERE I AN GOING ON A TANGENT ABOUT A FICTIONAL CHARACTER’S EYES

send help

anyways excuse me while I grab a box of strawberries to munch on and cry my eyes out all over my homework before I sleep-

[hoboblaidd]

Headcanon: Solas is 6'1.

Theory of the case: For all of Inquisition until Trespasser, Solas is doing an Apostate Slouch™ to appear more like a humble, unassuming elven apostate. Even then, he's taller than your average elf. From Trespasser on, he holds himself more like he is, aka, with good posture.

End of the day, this is my headcanon and I'm not claiming it's canon. It's not serious and the image "proof" within is iffy at best. This is just how I'm rolling on my blog.

The last three images are Veilguard spoilers. Tread carefully.

For reference, here's the apostate slouch in action. You’re not fooling anyone pal:

A note on the heights: Frankly, the Inquisition heights are a little all over the place, so they're not law to me. Everyone's posture in Inquisition also sucks but that's ok, it came out in 2014. But in the interest of science, I'll do an unscientific deep dive.

Here are the models. The person who took these photos said that the models for each character are the same height for every character of the same race/gender, so imo we can’t really use that (also his feet are pronated which is really bad for the knees/hips):

Same height as Cassandra (possibly slightly taller since she's in the foreground):

Hi Varric:

Solas is just shy of a head taller than Lavellan here:

About the same during the balcony kiss - she's looking up, he's looking pretty well down:

Here he's actually slouching, and they're the same height:

They're closer in height below - could be just to make the romance scene more cinematically balanced, or could this be a rare alternate form of the apostate slouch, the apostate shitty breakup slouch? (and, is this entire post an excuse to post my Lavellan? 60 minutes investigates tonight at 9):

This user put Solas side by side with the Sentinels. They’re a bit taller than the standard elves - here is an elven Inquisitor next to the hunched Sentinel guide. At best, Lavellan and old sentinel are the same height:

And here's Solas with the same. The angle's a bit weird, but you get the idea:

Here’s Solas (with a slight apostate slouch, please fix your posture) next to Abelas. About the same height, with Solas maybe a hair taller:

With Mythal, she's a human model and he's close to her height (factoring in the dual slouches):

For reference, here's Mythal-Flemeth with Garrett Hawke who is, as we know, a beefcake:

In Trespasser, Lavellan is closer to the camera and looking up. Solas is a good bit taller (but Karen, it's not that much taller! Well stfu. Also this is my favorite picture of him, it's so cold):

And finally, the reason I bumped him from 5'10 to 6'.

***********VEILGUARD SPOILER***********

Here’s Solas in front of Neve. The image quality sucks and the angle's bit weird, but he's about a head taller. She's a little closer to the camera in the first picture, but not by a significant amount:

For comparison, here's Neve on about the same plane as Emmrich (tallest save for Taash):

The end.

In sum, this is just my headcanon. I'm not claiming this to be canon and it's clearly not perfect. BUT since it's my blog, this is how I have his height. Ergo, he has two tiny adopted daughters.

[shalscumbunny]

Dear Doctor | Chapter 2: Depravity

Summary: Shalnark suffered a small injury while investigating some things for the Gen'ei Ryodan, his intention was that a doctor would cure him and nothing else, unfortunately that doctor was you and what you least expected is that one of the most wanted criminals in the world would end up becoming obsessed with you.

Pairing: Shalnark X F.Reader

Warnings: Stalking, theft of clothes, male masturbation, cum shot, cum tribute, Shalnark being a degenerate pervert as always

Author’s note: I always mention it in all my writings in English, but better safe than sorry, English is not my native language so it is very likely to find many mistakes and also that I know practically nothing about writing “X character and Y/N”

I am not a doctor so I will say my life excuse for everything, “I am a social science student”, so if something is wrong I apologize

Sites: AO3

From one day to the next you became a very important part of Shalnark's life, he loved to follow you everywhere and see you without you noticing, that only made it more exciting for him.

Soon his computer began to fill up with various photos of you being distracted, working or simply doing nothing, but the most valuable photo for him was the one he took with you, that photo was his wallpaper, just the two of us, together, smiling, your cute, beautiful and perfect smile.

However, Shalnark is not the type of man who settles so little, the times that he stalked you, the idea of taking something of yours as a souvenir began to haunt his head.

One day when you were coming out of your guard at the hospital, you dropped a package, obviously it was Shalnark who picked it up and took it to his house at a cheerful pace.

When he arrived, he saw that they were clothes that you had worn on guard duty, a smile adorned his face, all of that smelled of you, there was no better smell than that, however, there was a garment that caught his attention above all.

A perverted smile formed on Shalnark's face when he took your underwear in his hand, he instinctively brought it closer to his nose, beginning to sniff it shamelessly.

"Oh... my doctor smells so good" he gasped as he kept sniffing, sticking the garment to his nose and seeing your cute smiling face on his computer.

That delicious aroma of yours was driving him crazy, he was getting addicted, trying to memorize it as the arousal began to pump through his body.

It was a matter of minutes before Shalnark started patting his pants and soon after he started stroking his cock, he was so hard just from smelling so intimate from you.

His mind began to wander as he closed his eyes, Shalnark imagining his beloved doctor so inappropriately lewd now, speeding up in his hand.

"Y/N... You're so perfect... It feels so good... So good" Shalnark moaned, feeling his pleasure rise.

You looked so good in Shalnark's mind, you were so perfect in his dirty imagination of him about you, you were his cute, pretty doctor, it made him moan more desperately.

He was enjoying it, he was having fun smelling your underwear, caressing himself and undressing you in his mind, he could only smell that underwear like a needy madman.

He didn't take long to spill out, reaching ecstasy and dirtying his hand, but that depraved act was dedicated to you and only you.

"Y/N! Y/N! Y/N! I need you!” He moaned out loud feeling his heart rate quicken.

He was breathing heavily, on the edge, but he didn't care, he just went back to caressing himself and rubbing your underwear on his nose, moaning your name over and over again.

Your scent had him like an animal, panting and growling, imagining his dirtiest fantasies in that work of art that he held in his hands and that he would probably treasure forever.

Shalnark only became more and more degenerate when he thought of you and how much he loved and needed you, he ended up depriving himself of his climax and raised his hand starting to print your picture.

When the photo was ready, he put it on the desk and stood up starting to caress himself again with more vigor and sniff your underwear while looking at your pretty face in the photo, totally unable to blink.

“Doctor… How can you be so beautiful? Oh... you're beautiful... so perfect...” Shalnark praised you like a deity, dedicating this act so sick and impure to you “Soon I'll make you mine, don't worry... Soon you'll be mine alone, okay?”

Shalnark was panting with excitement looking at your photo until he finally climaxed again, watching with pride as your pretty face in the photo began to get smeared with his thick milky cum.

"Doctor... my semen looks so good on your beautiful face..." Shalnark moaned in your underwear

Shalnark had to sit down after that, the last climax was too intense, the best part where he let all his semen stain your pretty face, now he just smelled your underwear to calm down.

"God... that felt so good" he said, still sniffing and taking the photo with his other hand "I don't know how long I can take it, doctor... I need to see you in real life with my semen decorating your face...

Shalnark was freaking out about you… it was amazing how just a small act of kindness from you was enough to make him go crazy for you, but surely the best thing was that you didn't suspect anything at all.

Thank you so much for reading my shit 🖤

Chapter 1 <- Chapter 2 -> Chapter 3

[moorheadthanyoucanhandle]

ULTRA BEAUTY

Now on Netflix:

Ultraman: Rising--The very name Ultraman is a madeleine for me, evoking powerful childhood memories, often thrilling, just as often frustrating. As a kid in rural northwestern Pennsylvania in the early '70s, I used to try to tune in UHF Channel 29 from Buffalo, New York, on weekday afternoons to see reruns of the late '60s Japanese TV series about the solar-powered superhero who battled all manner of bizarre kaiju threatening humanity.

When the weather was clear, especially in the summer, I would often have a good signal, and I'd get a clear picture of the weird psychedelic paint swirls out of which the show's opening title would take shape. When the weather was lousy or wintry, I'd usually get nothing but snow, and great would be my indignant disappointment.

In the early iteration of the show that I loved (1966-67), created by Godzilla special effects master Eiji Tsuburaya, Ultraman was the alter-ego of Clark Kent-esque Hayata, an intrepid member of the "Science Patrol." This agency was tasked with animal control duties on the myriad massive monsters that regularly inconvenience Japanese society and threaten its infrastructure. When the situation became sufficiently desperate, Hayata would excuse himself and press a button on the "Beta Capsule" he carried, thus transforming himself into the sleek android giant, who would then fight the creature in question with a combination of martial arts and a variety of rays he could shoot from different parts of his body.

Ultraman's might was short-lived, however. Very early in the fight, a small warning light in the center of his chest would begin to flash, and the narrator, in the English-dubbed versions I saw, would gravely intone (if memory serves): "The energy which Ultraman draws from the sun diminishes rapidly in Earth's atmosphere. The warning light begins to blink. If it stops blinking before he returns to the sun, Ultraman will never rise again!" Or something like that. It seemed pretty urgent, every episode.

The franchise has continued in Japan throughout the decades, over dozens of series with differing characters, as well as movies, comics, video games etc. I never followed any of them. This animated feature from Netflix, however, is of American origin, though it's set in Japan and is an unmistakably loving homage. Directed by Shannon Tindle from a script he wrote with Marc Haimes, this one gives The Big U a new alter-ego, a handsome baseball star named Sato, who is estranged from his father, a scientist who once had the Ultraman secret identity gig.

Early on, a winged monster's baby imprints on Sato/Ultraman (voiced by Christopher Sean) and regards him as his parent. The story involves our hero's efforts, aided by a flying robotic sphere (Tamlyn Tomita) to protect the baby from the schemes of the kaiju-hating Dr. Onda (Keone Young), and also to mend his relationship with his Dad (Gedde Watanabe).

The old show was deeply silly but visually elegant; this new feature is visually elegant but balances the silliness with a sincere attempt at solid characterizations and relationships. It's an entertaining movie, but it does have a large downside, at least for me: I found the baby kaiju grotesquely cutesy; it looks like a mutant human baby in a tacky Halloween costume. It's like an Anne Geddes photo gone nightmarish.

In general, I could have done with more full-grown kaiju action. But the finale of Ultraman: Rising is fairly spectacular, and there's a lot to like in this movie. I would welcome future installments in this series. I particularly like the idea of an Ultraman who treats kaiju as humanely as possible. Or, rather, ultra-humanely.

[decibly]

Valerie knows that something is up with Danny. Just today, he ran out of three different classes and lunch, always claiming that he needed to go to the bathroom.

This had been happening for nearly three years.

Ever since Danny turned 14, he kept vanishing, almost every day, always claiming that he needed to go to the bathroom.

Valerie didn't pry into it, not normally. But lately things hadn't been normal, and Danny had been vanishing more than he ever had before.

About a week and a half ago, Valerie had made a decision. Whenever she brought up Danny’s disappearances, he always redirected the conversation, stopped talking and ran off, or just ignored it,

But no more.

(Well, Danny probably still wouldn’t answer any of her questions, but that wasn’t the point.)

Valerie was going to get some answers, goddamnit, even if she had to go rifling through all of Danny’s things.

Like she was about to do.

Danny had left class two and a half minutes ago, two minutes before the rest of the class headed home. He just took off, not bothering to take his backpack – decorated with pictures of stars and galaxies, of course – or even give a token excuse to the teacher. This was perfect.

Valerie raised her hand, and spoke. "Miss Black? Can I take Danny's backpack to his house if he doesn't show up?"

The teacher nodded, not bothering to speak, and gave her a dismissing wave of the hand. Valerie put her bag on in one swift motion, and picked up Danny's from where he had been sitting next to her. This was her chance, and she couldn't afford to screw up. Who knew if Danny would trust her again if she did.

Valerie hid herself away in a distant, dimly lit corner in the library that almost no one used, and set down both bags she was carrying. She thought briefly about setting up some sort of disguise, so that no one would be suspicious about what she was about to do, but quickly decided against it. Besides, setting something up would probably be much more suspicious and likely to get her noticed. Best to just get it over with, then.

She took a deep breath, held it for a few seconds, then released it. For no particular reason, she decided to start with the smallest pocket of the star-splattered bag. That had nothing in it except a phone with a case proudly displaying the NASA logo with words around it saying "IT'S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE… OH WAIT, IT IS!" and a well-worn paper copy of Danny's timetable. Valerie considered looking at the phone – even if she wasn't 100% right, she had a pretty good idea of what his passcode was – but decided to wait until she had gone through the rest of the bag.

Next up was the middle pocket. Inside was Danny's English book, a few papers for homework, a book on Biology, and a small laptop with – what else – space stickers. The laptop also had a few other stickers, with the most noticeable being stickers of a greenhouse, a PDA, and a green blob ghost. Still mostly space though.

Finally, the biggest pocket. Valerie held her breath, opened it, and was severely disappointed. There was nothing but a thermos!

Then Valerie realised what the thermos was. And the person who really owned it.

"DANNY'S HELPING PHANTOM? AND HE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING?"

A redhead on the other side of the bookshelf dropped his book on conspiracy theories, then groaned. "You too?! Why does no one believe me?!"

Valerie instantly retorted back, " because your theories are crazy Wes."

[quietbluejay]

Spotlight: Ultra Magnus

Hit it, Mags!

"independent war crimes arbiter ultra magnus" would have been really cool to have

Swindle's first appearance!

comics are fun

there's a whole crowd of the alien dudes also i do want to say it's fun to see all these other aliens showing up

First Alien: You have no authority here, Cybertronian, and Swindle...is under my protection. Guards...

First Alien: execute him!

Ultra Magnus: hm

we get to see his HUD and it's focusing on each of the weapons the guards have

nnnot entirely sure i like this ultra magnus design tbh

one guy starts reaching for his weapon

Ultra Magnus points at him

Ultra Magnus: don't

guard dude takes his hand away from his weapon

"Hey, Magnus!"

Ultra Magnus and Guard Dude look up

he fires it and Ultra Magnus jumps out of the way

Swindle collapses on his back

Ultra Magnus points his very large gun down at Swindle

Ultra Magnus: Just...

Ultra Magnus: ...give me an excuse!

Ultra Magnus slaps glowing cuffs on Swindle

then he points at the guy Swindle was working with

Ultra Magnus: as for you, Karzai Lorcha, you have a bad habit of offering miscreants safe harbor in return for, shall we say, utilization of their violent or criminal proclivities

Ultra Magnus: do so again, for other wanted Cybertronians...

Ultra Magnus:…and I'll bring the walls of Zull tumbling down

Swindle sneers at him

Swindle: Well, see, I'm not so sure. In my experience, everyone - no matter how unbending they may seem - wants something

Swindle: even you, Magnus...

Ultra Magnus turns and starts walking away

Ultra Magnus: no, nothing you have to offer would make me compromise my sworn duty

Swindle: oh yeah? not even…Scorponok?

Ultra Magnus turns his head towards Swindle

(heh)

Scorponok: the winner in the "how many different war crimes can you commit" contest

Ultra Magnus: one of the fundamental tenets of the allied Code of Interplanetary Conduct is the Non-Interaction Accord...

Ultra Magnus:...which limits the sharing of Cybertronian science

"…and pooling resources to create new and deadly variations on a militaristic theme" but hm. "morally ambivalent species" hm. hm

there's a picture of a crater

Ultra Magnus: the mutual aspect of the arrangement lasts only as long as it takes Scorponok to absorb the choicest cuts of local innovation and infrastructure. After which...

Ultra Magnus:...he carefully erases all traces of his machinations, and moves on

Ultra Magnus fiddles with the controls of his ship

Ultra Magnus: Grudgingly, I concede that Swindle is right. If he knows Scorponok's current whereabouts, and if that knowledge means I can take him unawares before he has a chance to cut and run...

Ultra Magnus:...then he does have something I want

"But is it enough to make me 'bend'? In my book, one compromise leads to another…and another…and pretty soon…"

Ultra Magnus crosses his arms

"…you've crossed the line you're supposed to be holding"

there's a shot of Ultra Magnus' ship leaving a red planet

he did, in fact, agree to cut Swindle loose

but left him on "the remotest, least savory trading post of the quadrant" without a cent to his name UM, did you steal Swindle's money and possessions? for shame :p okay but no seriously did he

it's the planet of the 80s!

Ultra Magnus is in truck form, scoping the place out

"But I have to be sure"

wait no, green guy is his holoavatar

next panel is him talking to a receptionist in purple

UM narrating: replicated identity documents and a certain amount of creative commercial bluster get my holomatter simulacrum past security and reception...

"…and into a meeting with the consortium's Director of Marketing"

this Ultra Magnus (international lawman of mystery) is a pretty fun character

"...and a quick realignment of the holomatter matrix"

now he looks like the director

"...I'm all the way in"

"Cybertronian technology, without a doubt. Enough of it, anyways, to let me know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, I've found what I'm looking for"

he goes to examine the tube

"I take a closer look…"

trauma buffers, huh

love it

"…I feel it!"

somehow the electricity travels through…idk what medium, to electrocute UM's cab

"It's a race against time"

"Can I reach him before he strips out all the essential data and hardware…"

it's 3v1

and UM is wondering about his Scorponok is planning on taking the organic-Cybertronian blend to a whole other level

"If so…"

they start shooting at Ultra Magnus

"Then stopping him…"

the shots basically just bounce off of him

"is an even greater priority"

Ultra Magnus drives off, having knocked them out

"I spare no thought for my would-be executioners. They're just animated, auto-piloted armour. The real enemy..."

"...is within"

Ultra Magnus arrives on the rooftop, and goes back into robot mode

"And, en route to Scorponok's sub-surface lair..."

"...I get into character"

Ultra Magnus, out loud: Scorponok...

Scorponok: in the past, I've simply wound up my operations, and moved on, but I've on the verge of something quite breathtaking in scope here…so…

Scorponok: it's you who must go

he throws Magnus back

Scorponok: as in dead and gone!

he throws Magnus through a wall

Scorponok: since our paths last crossed, Magnus, there have been…

his tail is glowing

Scorponok: Zarak? No!

Scorponok: Get back! I can't st-

unfortunately he can't stop it from firing

but Ultra Magnus uses the distraction to get out of the way

Magnus grabs his gun

Scorponok: Maaagnus...

Scorponok: This is all your fault!

Magnus: Scorponok, stop!

Magnus: Don't...make me...

Ultra Magnus fires and hits Scorponok in the corner of his head

Scorponok walks it off, Ultra Magnus is too winded

UM narrating: somehow, driven onwards by some ruthlessly stubborn streak of self-preservation...

"...he doesn't go down"

"And by the time I'm on my feet..."

"…whatever it takes…"

"…I will bring him to justice!"

decepticon high justice huh

"I will never forget that vow, but as time passes I start to wonder...just how far I will go to get the job done!"

Swindle: so...let's deal!

The end?

and that's the UM spotlight

some notes:

(my friend said this originally, I slightly rephrased it) this is very mildly spoilery but this shows a repeated pattern of behaviour with Scorp where he gets protective and melodramatic over his modified partners in crime

you know this was UM's first appearance also I think first appearance of Swindle and the term "tyrest accords" it does imply that the Decepticons do have some kind of war crimes that overlap with the Autobot idea of war crimes, which is interesting and also that there's some level of cooperation regarding rogues from both sides

on the topic of Furman:

I think he's quite good at storytelling within a comics medium friend: his flow is great friend: barber and scott both have their hand in multiple layers but furman specializes in doing one layer really well

on the topic of Cybertronian-alien relations:

friend: let's remember, Ultra Magnus in this issue:

in one he blows up a base, threatens people, and shuts down a fruitful business relationship

here he's breaking into a semi military think tank with the intention to shut it down

and in between those he dumped swindle on a random space port, probably without actually telling any of the locals about it

me: ultra magnus, may i remind you, canonically has a good rep with the Galactic Council he's the "calm, straightlaced one" yeahhhh there's a reason they go around in disguise lol

other friend: cursed thought Cybertronians are the Spike Witwicky's of the galaxy

(we all agreed that this was accurate and also we hated it so much)

on the topic of Scorponok:

me: scorponok is the literal worst but somehow he is like a sad wet worm that you see on the sidewalk and want to rescue friend: scorponok is the literal worst but at the same time you can't help but want him to achieve his dream of settling down somewhere and making an army of increasingly fucked up cyborgs

there was the detour where I talked about my scorp&tarantulas teamup AU but some of it's spoilery for Laurafic (though tbh even mentioning this is spoilery) buuut I'm gonna share some of it anyways because it's funny

me: scorp gives off the vibes that he would go 0 to 100 in terms of attachment friend: i don't even think there would be a clear line from the 0 to 100 friend: he'd be monologuing about how he's using his creations to take over this pitiful planet and the next day you're wondering if packing a box lunch is a necessary part of the plan and if you feel like arguing about it me: they (Scorp&Tarantulas) wouldn't fix each other and they wouldn't make each other worse, but instead, some secret third thing friend: they'd support each other's hobbies in a way thats healthy for them and apocalyptic for the wider world

unfortunately for spoiler purposes I have to stop there but it did end up discussing how introducing Tarantulas to Homestuck should probably be illegal under the Tyrest Accords

(and also we talked about some interesting AU stuff with Scorp but it's spoilery for some more immediate comics stuff. so. putting a pin in this one)

and I'm gonna do a few Hot Rod notes as a separate post cause that came up then too