#nora is in here somewhere

[wolfprincesszola]

Aphrodite's Visit (Miraculous Ladybug)

i actually really love this couple so much. i wish they had more exposure + they had a better romance arc than just suddenly getting together, but we take what we have to take. still not good at titles (and maybe need to start working on my summaries), but I hope you enjoy! <3

Masterlist ——————– Summary: Nino Lahiffe had just been face-to-face with Aphrodite herself and thinks he managed to curse every love interaction he would ever have in the future with bad luck. Is he truly as screwed as he think he is, or will he come to terms with some feelings he has for his best friend, Alya Césaire?

Trigger Warnings: None

Content Warnings: Food (Boba) ——————–

Nino Lahiffe had just been face-to-face with Aphrodite herself and had managed to curse every love interaction he would ever have in the future with bad luck.

To be honest, Nino was not one to believe in Greek gods. He wasn’t really religious so he stuck to science. Nothing was ever unexplained with science and that was enough for Nino to know. There had been nothing to disprove his beliefs either, so it was fair to assume that Nino was surprised to find that Greek gods did in fact exist by running into Aphrodite herself.

It was a normal Thursday morning when he went to go get boba for both him and Alya. Because they were supposed to study together for their latest math quiz, Nino thought it was a good idea to grab some boba before seeing her. He texted her asking what type of boba she wanted, and she sent a shop that Marinette had recommended them. Alya also texted her order and Nino had quickly routed to the cafe.

The Girl of All Trades Tea and Coffee Shop. Huh, Nino wondered what that meant. When he walked in, he was surprised to find that there were very little people in the shop. There were only three people, not including Nino, in there. A cashier, a barista, and someone sitting in one of the booths.

Nino walked up to the front to order, "Hi, can I have one Aphrodite's Heartbreak Tea with brown sugar boba and one Yue Lao's Red String Coffee with brown sugar boba? Thank you."

"That will be €10.57." The cashier smiled at Nino. Nino gave a €20 note to them.

"Thank you. Feel free to sit anywhere. We'll call you up when your drinks are ready." The cashier gave Nino the receipt and Nino nodded before scanning the cafe. Considering the cafe had just opened, it was generally understandable why there was only one customer at 11 in the afternoon. Looking at the person sitting in one of the booths as he was now at an angle where he could see them, he was surprised. He walked over to the booth, sitting across from the girl.

"Alya? What are you doing here? I thought I was coming over to your house after picking up the drinks. You even sent me your order."

The girl's lips upturned into a small smile, amusingly snorting, "I'm not Alya."

Nino blinked only to find that in place of Alya was another girl that he had never met before, but was a conventionally beautiful blonde, who looked nothing like Alya. "Oh, uh, sorry, I must've mistaken you for someone else."

"No, it's okay, Nino." The girl smiled once more, now a completely different person. This time, she was an attractive blue-haired dark-skinned girl. "It takes everyone some getting used to."

A chill ran down Nino's spine as he stared at the girl, constantly changing appearances with every blink of his eyes. "How do you know my name?"

"I know everyone's names. I think the question should be, how do you not know mine? I thought it'd be obvious by now who I am."

Nino tried to focus on the girl's eyes to get any hint on who she was, but it just kept changing. Brown, blue, green, hazel, heterochromia, amber, grey. It seemed on the tip of his tongue, as if knowing the girl's name was natural and something he should know.

"Sorry." Nino gave an awkward smile.

"It's okay."

At least in every single one of her variations, she looked kind. She looked patient, and she looked caring.

"Should I know who you are?"

"Yes."

"Sorry." Nino hung his head low in embarrassment, "Are you a family friend or something? I just don't know."

The girl kept changing appearances. Maybe it was a trick of the light. Maybe he was going insane. Maybe he was hallucinating.

"Don't worry about it, Nino. I know you're still adjusting to what you think I look like."

She was right. Nino didn't know how a trick of the light could change someone's eye color or skin color. Even her hair color was changing every millisecond.

"Who are you?"

"I'm really surprised you don't know this." The girl pouted and for a second, he saw a flash of Alya once more. "Anyways, that's not the real point we have here. Your drinks are coming out soon and I'd like to still have time to talk to you rather than have you freak out the entire time. You're struggling right now, aren't you?"

"Huh?"

"You're having a hard time expressing your feelings, especially to the girl you love."

"What?" Nino choked on his own spit, "Sorry? I...think you have the wrong Nino. I'm not in love with anyone."

"Oh really?" The girl raised an eyebrow and suddenly, she had stopped flickering between different appearances. Instead, she was in front of him, presenting as an identical version of Alya, but it wasn't Alya. She didn't have the same mannerisms as Alya, nor did she have the same voice. The only thing was that she looked exactly like her. "Then who am I?"

"You keep asking that. I don't know!" He huffed.

"Then tell me, do you think I'm attractive?" Faux-Alya blinked innocently. "Am I everything you wished for and more? Tell me that much at least."

Sure, he thought Alya was cute. He thought she was attractive even, but Alya was just his best friend. Nothing more. Besides, he liked Alya for who she was. He didn't think only that parts of her were cute. Sure, he liked how pretty her eyes were, but he also liked how they crinkled at the edges when she smiled. He liked her lips, but he liked the mannerisms of her speaking more. He liked a lot of Alya's physical appearance, but he liked her personality better. He liked the sound of her voice and her laugh. He liked how kindness made Alya look more attractive. He liked how her hair flowed with the wind and how carefree she looked when she was having fun. He liked how she was always unafraid to be bold and courageous. He liked her as a person, not just her beauty.

By Faux-Alya looking like Alya, she had gotten rid of every part of Alya that Nino liked. Without her mannerisms and without her voice, Alya wasn't the girl he was sitting across. She was just some regular girl that Nino would pass by and note that she was pretty. Alya, however, transcended his beauty standards all together.

"No."

"What?" Faux-Alya gaped as she stood up in surprise, "What do you mean 'no'?"

"You heard what I said. Do you want me to repeat it to you? No. You're just a random pretty girl. You're not attractive, and definitely not everything I wished for and more." Nino snorted.

"B-but how?" She stuttered. "You have to have seen the girl of your dreams. The love of your life. The person you've been having a hard time expressing your feelings. You've been running from your feelings."

"I have two drinks for a Nino?" The cashier called out.

"I seriously think you have the wrong person, ma'am. All I see in front of me is my best friend, and you're not doing a very good job of mimicking her. I don't know if you're a doppelgänger or just someone that was hired to pretend to be Alya, but I'd advise you to look towards honing your craft." Nino bowed as he stood up, going to grab the drinks. He smirked as he walked out of the shop, seeing the girl gaping and dumbfounded at what he said. Good, it should keep her from making anyone else more gullible fall for her tricks.

As he placed the two drinks into the front cupholder of his car, he froze in fear. The name that had slipped his mind had finally come back.

Aphrodite.

He had insulted a literal Greek goddess. He had told the literal goddess of love and beauty that she was not attractive. He had told her that she was a scam.

No, no, maybe he was overthinking this. Maybe he should stop by Adrien’s house first to ask him about what he knew about Aphrodite.

No...that would also be overthinking. Nothing happened. He wasn't just talking to Aphrodite. He hadn't just insulted her. It was just some random girl trying to prey on him with Alya's looks. That was all it was.

He was shaking for no reason. He was going to be perfectly fine.

He tried his hardest not to focus on the fact that he had run into Aphrodite or the fact that she kept saying he was running from his feelings or the fact that she chose to stay in the form that looked identical to Alya, but he couldn't shake the feeling off throughout his entire hangout with Alya. They were supposed to study with each other, but Nino kept making careless mistakes. He would be forgetful, zone out, and overall not be present with her.

"Nino!"

Nino blinked, getting out of his thoughts once more to find that he had been staring at a scribble of incoherent notes for the past few minutes.

"You okay?" Alya asked worried, "You've been getting every single practice problem wrong when you never fail those concepts, and you don't really seem fully there when we're reading the textbook."

"Hm? I'm fine. I guess it was not a good idea for me to study with very little sleep." Nino lied through his teeth. Even Alya knew he was lying. "Maybe I should lie down.”

“Yeah, feel free to take up the couch.” Alya replied worryingly as she moved to let Nino collapse on the couch. Maybe a bit of sleep wouldn't hurt him.

Nino woke up a few hours later to a bright flashlight in his face. He blinked awake, surprised to see Nora looking at him.

"What the hell?" Nino muttered as he was rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He sat up in surprise. "What's going on?"

"I'm checking on your health because Alya was pestering me to." Nora rolled her eyes, "Your friend is fine. He's getting the recommended amount of sleep and it looks like he just wanted a nap. He doesn't have a fever or some weird condition."

"Oh, okay, good." Alya nodded, kneeling down to Nino to make sure that he was okay. Nino was still adjusting to his environment.

"And why are you here?" Nino accused Marinette, who was sitting upside down on a chair, scrolling on her phone.

"Woah, I didn't even do anything to you. Why are you upset?" Marinette snorted, "But if you really must know, I felt lonely at home, so I came to bug Alya."

"Don't you have your own boyfriend to bug?" Nino shot back.

"Wow, you're fiesty today." Marinette snorted, "Adrien’s been really tired recently from his dad overworking him, so he's been sleeping all day to regain his energy, but you're right. I should get home soon to help my parents close up the bakery, so I guess that's my cue to leave."

"Alright, bye, Mari." Alya waved as Marinette went to go hug her best friends before leaving.

"Wait!"

"Oh, wow, now you want me to stay? Make up your mind." Marinette snorted, rolling her eyes at Nino, "What's going on with you? You're acting really weird."

"Can you tell me everything about Aphrodite that you know? Alya said you were a big fan of Greek mythology. I wasn't, so I'd like some advice."

"Well...what do you want to know? She's the Greek goddess of love and beauty. She's said to be the most beautiful woman in the world and that she often flickers between appearances of different women because beauty is subjective. The first person you see her as is defined as your version of beauty. She's portrayed to be a jealous and arrogant woman who can't take insults about not being the most beautiful. She's also portrayed to curse anyone that crosses her. I doubt the last parts are very accurate."

Great....was Nino going to have to start worshipping her? Does that mean that she would curse his love life? It was already in the ground; how much worse could it get?

"Thanks." Nino replied as he let Marinette leave and suddenly, his world was back to crashing down. Great. He was utterly and morally screwed.

"You sound defeated." Alya remarked as he walked back into the room.

"I'm out of it today. I'm sorry, Alya." Nino mumbled, "Maybe I'll go back to my house and rest again. Maybe that'll help me."

"Okay, feel better." Alya replied. She looked worried for Nino. Nino felt awful about making her worry, but there was nothing else he could do.

With that, he drove back home, his mind numb. When he reached home, he made sure to double-triple-check that he locked the car, that he was unlocking his house. Then, when he got into his room and locked the door, he yelped upon seeing Alya laying on his pullout couch, smirking at him.

No...it wasn't Alya. She kept changing heights, hair types, colors...

It was Aphrodite.

"Remember my name now?" Aphrodite asked, smirking at him as she kept flickering through different types of women. She walked over towards Nino, who was starting to bow at the goddess, "I want to hear you say it."

"Aphrodite."

"Good boy." She hummed, crouching down in her heels until she was at eyelevel with Nino, "Why are you on the ground?"

"To show respect towards a Goddess."

He really needed to start going to temples to pray for her, didn't he?

"That's too outdated." Aphrodite pulled Nino up, "A lot of the negative things your friend said about me is also outdated and completely sexist."

"So you're not going to curse me for crossing you?"

"Oh Olympus no." Aphrodite giggled as she went back to sitting on his couch. "Us gods aren't like that. Nothing like how the myths depict us. We're here to help the humans. Nothing more, nothing else."

Nino was nervous, but soon took the seat that Aphrodite offered him across from her, as if it wasn't his house.

"So the Greek gods are real?"

"Yes. And so is your God, and so are the Chinese gods and the Hindu gods and...you get it. Anything that anyone believes in is real. We actually work together to help every human out there. We're kinder than depicted in every tale about us." Aphrodite remarked, "I thought you were a really interesting case though, so I came down to help you."

"Me?"

"Yes, you. I've seen a lot of cases of love, but it's rare to find one as pure as yours. Your heart is so pure, and so is the girl you love, but you won't open yourself up to those feelings. I know you were hurt before, but that shouldn't determine you not opening your heart up to more love."

"Tch." Nino looked away, crossing his arms. "How would you know anything?"

"Nino, I am the literal goddess of love, but uncommon to popular belief, it's not just romantic love. It's also platonic love, familial love, and most importantly, self-love." Aphrodite replied, "And I know that you have no problem with any of the other types. You only struggle with romantic love. Why is that?"

"I don't know."

"Alright." Aphrodite sighed before standing up. She was flickering between entities and then suddenly, it stopped and stayed on Alya's appearance. "Who do you see?"

"My best friend Alya."

"Who you're in love with."

"What?" Nino flushed in confusion, "I'm not in love with her!"

"Then tell me why you see her."

"Because I think she's attractive? That's not a bad thing. I think all girls are beautiful in their own way."

"But don't you see? I come in all forms of beauty, but beauty is subjective, so the person you see right now is the person you think is the most beautiful person in the world. And that sort of beauty blossoms from love."

Nino hesitated.

"Have you ever thought about wanting to be more than friends with Alya?"

Nino hesitated with his words, "No, because when I met Alya, she had just moved to a new place and as much as she didn’t want to admit it, she came from a really dark place in her life. I didn't feel right wanting a relationship with her during that time, and even after she adjusted to her new life and gained great friends, I guess I had just been so used to telling myself that we were just friends that I couldn't see us as anything else. Even if I wanted to."

"So think about it now. Would you want to be more than friends?"

Yeah, he would. More than anything in the world. He had been no stranger to the electricity and sparks that came from an accidental brush of the hand, or the awkwardness that came from them hugging. He had gotten so used to the way his heart pounded in his chest upon seeing Alya that it just felt natural to be like that around her.

"No. We're better off as just friends." Nino sighed, standing up to start putting his stuff back. He still hadn't unpacked from being at Alya's place.

"You can't lie to an all-knowing deity, especially not to the goddess of love about love. I know what you want, and I'm just here to tell you that maybe it's better if you open yourself up to those feelings. What's the worst that could come out from it?"

"I lose the best friend that I've learned to rely on." Nino pointed out. "I still don't understand why you're helping me. You're an all-knowing goddess about love."

"Like I said, you have a really pure heart, something I don't see in any other man in the world. I like to meddle with love, even if I've been told countless times not to. I guess that's just the flaw in me, but if you think you're so special, think again. I always meddle in Yue Lao's business, especially when it comes to his red string makings."

Nino froze at that, looking at Aphrodite, "Alya's my soulmate?"

"Well-" Aphrodite began, clearly being caught with revealing too much information, "Would you believe me if I said no?"

"No."

"Good. I hope you know that it's not scary to open your heart up to these things and that sometimes it's better to be heartbroken than to forever be cursed with loving someone from afar." Aphrodite winked, "Now, I've got to get home. I'm terribly late for a date with my husband. Ares is waiting for me."

"Husband?" Nino stuttered. "Wasn't it-"

"They've really got to update those mythology books on us." Aphrodite gave a small smile before she was gone, disappeared in a blink of an eye.

As soon as she was gone, his phone rang and Nino was quick to pick it up, not even looking at the caller ID. "Hello?"

"Did you get home safe, Nino? I know you've been feeling out of it today." Alya asked.

The symptoms flooded through his system again. Butterflies, fastened heart rate, goofy smiling, shaky hands, flushed face.

"Thanks for checking in. I'm feeling better after all that rest I got. I'm sorry for worrying you, and I'm sorry for not being 100% when I was with you today."

"Hey, you're my best friend, you don't always have to be 100% when you're with me." Nino could hear Alya smiling through the phone, "Don't push yourself for school or anything."

"I won't next time. I promise." Nino hummed.

Maybe Aphrodite was right. Maybe it wouldn't be so scary to think about Alya other than a friend, if he was feeling like this all the time.

"Listen, I wanted to ask you if it would be alright." Alya's voice was starting to shake nervously. She was never nervous, or at least, she never showed her nervousness. Nino wondered what she was going to ask about.

"What would be alright?"

"If we could go for boba tomorrow." Alya replied before adding, "Only if you're up to it!"

"Of course. Why would I ever say no to spending time with my favorite person in the world?" Nino asked.

"Not as friends though."

"What?" Nino asked, confused.

"Maybe...as more than that?"

Nino smiled. He had known Alya for a very long time. Despite Alya being the boldest and most confident person he had ever met, Alya wasn't one to try and make the first move. If she was willing to do this, it meant that she was getting sick and tired of Nino ignoring his feelings. Maybe this was a sign.

"I'd love to."

"I'll come over at 3 pm?"

"It's a date."

"It's a date." Alya confirmed and he heard her voice melt with relief as she hung up.

Okay, Nino could work with this. All he had to do now was find a way to thank the goddess that helped him guide his journey. He was sure she had some part in meddling with Alya's sides of things. He really hoped he didn't have to sacrifice any virgins or doves to thank her.

[jeanmoreausautismstickers]

and when i write jean moreau with "property of riko moriyama" etched into his lower back in jagged lines what then?

[gfl-neural-cloud]

[Doll Archive] //:_Nora

VOICE I Mai Fuchigami CAREERI Playwright The EW-55 is a writer Doll by Cyber Media, primarily intended for narrative design and scriptwriting. In order to address isues with Doll-produced prose, such as dullness and a lack of congruency, the EW-55 is specially equipped with an information procesing system possessing a degree of randomness, allowing the EW-55 a chance to generate new ideas from any received information, thus simulating the process of "inspiration" experienced by human writers. As a Doll screenwriter, Nora's works spanned the fields of film, television, literature, games and many others. In order to give her the chance to collect more material for future work. Nora's studio decided to enter her into Project Neural Cloud.

"I'm Nora, though that's a pen name. Idle chatter aside, I'd like a quiet environment... My deadline is approaching and I haven't written a thing yet."

[boffinsandbeasties]

i spent a week and a half stressing that my cold was covid and i would get somebody sick (and wasted So much money on tests) and felt finally in the clear only for my poor roommate to come home from a trip with Actual covid. i’ve said it before i’ll say it again our new world is a fucking hellscape for anxious bitches and it could be so much better but it never will be because humanity’s greatest technological advancement for information access has been co-opted by the worst of us as a disinformation machine. barring major, unimaginable change i think smallpox will be the first and last disease we as a species eradicate and i think that’s a FUCKING travesty

[hier--soir]

a lover's pinch | seven

joel miller x f!reader

pairing: professor!joel miller x f!reader rating: explicit, 18+ mdni summary: things get a little messy after returning home. a confrontation sparks the beginning of a new stage in your relationship with joel. warnings/tags: au, university professor joel, age gap [20 something years diff], ethically dubious relationship due to inherent power imbalance, angst, miscommunication trope, self-doubt, alcohol consumption/hangover, joel is 50 and he texts like it, les mis spoilers???, phantom of the opera spoilers???, jealous!joel, food/eating, hurt/comfort, professor DAD, professor COWBOY, soft emotional smut, unprotected piv sex, cream pie, oral [f!receiving], joel says dadgum cause i think it's so classic him and so cute. word count: 11.1k jesus series masterlist | main masterlist chapter moodboard a/n: merry christmas to all that celebrate. as always, thank you for your patience and kindness. the love for this series is nothing short of mind blowing, and i appreciate you all endlessly. i hope you enjoy this angst and potentially the most flowery + emotional ALP smut yet [if that's even possible]. also rachel i love you i'm sorry. without further ado, the beginning of our descent into The End Times x follow @hier--soirupdates if you'd like to be notified when i share my writing this is part seven of ALP. you can read the previous parts here: one, two, three, four, five, six.

Tuesday.

It's nine thirty in the morning and you buy a Coke anyways.

It’s raining heavy outside; fat droplets of water that splatter against the windscreen of your car and dribble down, slipping through the crevice at the top of the bonnet, searching for the engine, for the oil gasket, for somewhere undercover to dry out.

You tuck your legs beneath yourself, sit criss-cross in the driver’s seat, and take small sips of fizzing black sugar. Allow it to moisten your lips, coat your tongue and your teeth in that sickening, viscous way soda always does, before it slips down your throat.

There’s something unearthly about the day, unnerving—it’s Tuesday morning and you’re hungover. A dull ache behind your left eye, a kink in your neck. You check your phone.

Thick, rolling clouds loom across the sky. Occasionally, a flash of lightning, a thrum of thunder. You tear open a packet of peanuts and pluck one out, and then another. Eat until your lips are dry and puckered, and then take another drink. More peanuts then. Salty, sweet, salty, sweet.

It’s all you can stomach as your liver pumps and spasms, still working to cleanse your blood of the night before, spent sprawled on the couch with Trin and Nora.

Wearing sweaters and thick socks, gripping full glasses of wine, and watching Les Misérables. Nora, tears on her cheeks, had sung along with Hugh Jackman—'This innocent who bears my face, who goes to judgement in my place, who am I?’—and you, bleary-eyed and tipsy, had discreetly checked your phone.

You didn’t cry during I Dreamed A Dream but you’re crying for this? Trin rolled her eyes.

He sacrifices his freedom to save that man, Nora whimpered.

You woke up starving and the traffic was slow. At every red light and stop sign your fingers itched against the wheel, desperate to press inside your bag and pull out this little packet. And now, safe in the campus parking lot, you feast. Salty, sweet, salty, sweet. You feel a fleeting moment of pity for people with peanut allergies, and then you check your phone.

Still nothing.

Since you left New York on Monday morning there’s been no sign of life from Joel. No get home safe, no see you on Tuesday; no acknowledgement at all.

You stare dejectedly at the messages you’ve sent him.

First from yesterday afternoon:

Home now. Enjoy your last day in the big apple x

And then from late last night, two bottles of wine deep:

It’s raining and miserable here

Wish I was still in new york

With you

Sitting in your car now, glowering at the blank space where his response should be, you reconcile with the thought that perhaps he wants what happened in New York to stay in New York. Stolen glances and all-too-brief touches in a conference hall, his hand on your wrist at the museum, skin against skin in his hotel room, and in yours—perhaps it was supposed to happen there, not here. The lowering of walls came with a change in location, and maybe that was his intention. But those thoughts don’t ease the sharp twist in your chest when you think of him. Doesn’t take away how much you wish he would give you something – a morsel of communication, even a single word of acknowledgement. For as hard as you try to understand, you can’t forget the look in his eyes when he touched you at the cloisters, the way he breathed your name into your mouth. Sewing the seed of JoelJoelJoel into in the soft folds of your brain, impossible to forget.

You don’t think about his dinner with Rachel. Don’t consider that something may have happened that night, something that changed his mind about you. Something that made him rethink the entire weekend as you slipped into the shower and out the door, leaving him alone in your hotel bed while you headed to the airport.

No. You don’t think about that at all.

When you make it inside, clothes wet and cool from the rain, you shake your hair out like a dog. Let droplets fly across the hall as you make your way into the lecture theatre; a drizzled trail left in your wake.

The room is full when you step inside, but there’s no sign of him yet. You collapse into an empty chair in the front row and wait. The final few students filter in through the door, shaking out umbrellas and wiping their feet. And for another ten minutes you, foolishly, still expect Joel to show up.

It’s only when the door creaks open and an old man walks through, that you let the hopeful feeling rest.

He lays a worn old satchel against the desk and turns to smile at the room.

“Hello,” the stranger smiles, and his jowls quiver as he speaks. “I’m Jerry Dorfman, a Professor from the literature department, and…”

You zone out for a second, eyes darting down to your phone screen. Nothing.

“Oh, and Professor Miller,” Dorfman says, as if he’s just remembered that he shouldn’t be here. Shouldn’t be standing up there, in his spot. “Is tied up with a family matter. I trust he’ll be back with us later in the week.”

A family matter?

Slick with rain, staring at this stranger stood in Joel’s place, you feel like a kind of newborn. Some fresh lamb, soaked in the blood and amniotic fluids of her mother’s womb, staring through unseeing eyes, hoping to glean some understanding of this moment. This sudden burst of light, this shocking cold after so many weeks of warmth, of sweat and strong hands on your skin, holding you close. But this is Eros; the blacksmith, the limb-loosener, the crusher. A deviation from stoking the flame to the suddenly desperate, grasping loneliness of feeling as though you are standing by a lover’s window, staring helplessly through the glass, and watching them from the outside. Alone.

Dorfman tries and fails to connect his laptop to the projector.

Numb fingers type;

Are you okay? Where are you?

But no response comes.

No, not until later that night, not until you’re tucked beneath the covers of your bed, showered and sleepy, does he finally reach out.

The clock has just ticked past midnight when your phone vibrates.

Hey, I had to stay in the city another day. Just landed at PWM. See you on Thursday.

A hot, jagged feeling swims in your gut as you read the message, and then reread it. Twice, three more times, searching for some hint of familiarity. Some indication that he has been thinking about you as much as you’ve been thinking about him. That the past weekend meant something to him, like it meant to you.

Minutes pass, and when you don’t find what you’re looking for, you fall asleep without responding.

Thursday.

Nora wakes up with a stuffy nose.

This always happens to me, she sniffs. I hate being sick.

The tiles in the kitchen are cold beneath your bare toes and rain smears heavily against the windowpane. You can hear fat blooms of thunder bellowing outside. Nora’s sullen, husky voice paired with the steam rising from your mug are all it takes to convince you to stay home with her.

The two of you spend the day curled on the sofa beneath blankets. You stare at your laptop, a document open on your screen with the title of an essay sitting pretty at the top. The cursor blinks and blinks at you, taunting you, daring you to write something, anything. But Sex and The City is playing on the tv, and Nora is snoring at the other end of the sofa, and you can’t help but watch the minutes tick by on the clock. Listen to Carrie and Miranda argue about Big, and wonder if Joel has even noticed your absence.

Trin gets home from class, and you follow her into the kitchen. Peel and slice oranges and apples and lemons while she tells you about her day. Boil them in sugar with cinnamon and star anise while she complains about an argument she had with her boyfriend. Add red wine and brandy while she tells you that her Dad sent her some money, and she’ll order take out for the three of you.

So together you huddle in the lounge and eat hot Indian food with your hands. Soak pieces of naan in tarka dal and saag paneer and top if off with mulled wine, unphased by the clashing of flavours in your mouths.

And you don’t check your phone, or look at the time, and you don’t complain when Nora asks, with glassy-eyes and spinach in her teeth, if she can put on another musical.

He’s a freak, Trin frowns at the TV.  

He loves her, Nora implores, staring doe-eyed at a masked Gerard Butler.

Nor, Trin scoffs, he put a wedding dress on a mannequin that looks just like her. In his fucking lair, no less. That’s freak behaviour.

He has amazing sideburns though, Nora grins. So he gets a pass.

Your phone vibrates as Erik strokes a passed-out Christine’s face, singing help me make the music of the night.

Careful that Nora won’t notice, you pull it from beneath your thigh.

Where were you today?

You stare at the words for a moment and feel your lips curl into an disbelieving sneer.

“Oh, fuck off,” you mutter, and shove your phone into the crevice between the sofa cushions.

Wednesday.

A week goes by with no word from Joel.

No word from you either.

You stay home every day. Write and read and catch up on work and take Benadryl and sip soup and then you wake one morning, relieved to find that Nora’s cold has finally left your system.

So you tug on jeans, a sweater, and share a pot of coffee in the kitchen. Share quiet conversation with Pete in his shitty old Beamer as he gives you a ride to campus, and walk into Rachel’s lecture with zero expectation that today will be the day you finally see Joel again.

“We understand that Antigone is a victim of her father’s sins,” Rachel explains. “In the wake of patricide, of incest, every one of her actions is seen as a direct consequence.”

“Even her fate to be buried alive was sewn by her father’s unwitting actions,” she pauses, eyes searching the faces across the room, gauging reactions. “And, of course, this concept isn’t unique to Greek mythology. We see it plainly in the Bible, in Exodus; the sins of your father are to be laid upon the children… these themes of ancestral curses, of the inevitability of fate – they are integral to understand when looking at our tragic heroines. We saw it with Medea, we see it with Antigone, with Iphigenia, with Electra. Electra herself said, we are bound to acquiesce—”

An interrupting knock sounds against the door. Rachel’s head swivels around, eyebrows knitted in frustration as she calls for whoever it is to come in.

The door creaks open and her expression lifts. A saccharine smile spreads across her face, shoulders loosening.

“Joel,” she says warmly. “What can I do for you?”

A shiver wracks down your spine, toes curling in your sneakers.

The broad mass of him rests in the doorway. His head peeks past the wood, just a glimpse of his curls, his glasses, visible from where you sit. Your heart thunders in your chest, palms going damp at the prospect of this being the moment you finally see him again.

He speaks a few words in her direction, too quiet to catch, and then he’s taking a step into the room. His hand grips the edge of the door, keeping it open, and he casts a glance out towards the audience. Dark brown and searching, those eyes filter through countless faces until they finally land on yours.

And for a second, he doesn’t say a word. Just gazes out at you, eyebrows pulled together in the middle of his forehead, and then—and then he fucking looks back at Rachel. Your stomach goes hollow when you see the smile on her face. She lazes against the corner of her desk, and it feels like minutes go by as the two of you stare at him. And there’s something about waiting, you think, that feels like torture. That slow, painful build-up of pressure as you sit and stare and prepare yourself to discover who he’s here for. You or her.  

You’re reminded painfully of a Graham Greene quote. A passage from The End of the Affair – one you’d, perhaps foolishly, found romantic when you read it that first time. Chosen words that had warmed your chest and made you feel light, lighter than air; the way only words could do sometimes.

‘Yes, Henry?’ and then ‘You?’ She had always called me ‘you’. ‘Is that you?’ on the telephone, ‘Can you? Will you? Do you?’ so that I imagined, like a fool, for a few minutes at a time, there was only one ‘you’ in the world and that was me.

Now, as you stare at Joel in the mouth of the doorway and memory of that passage sinks its hooks in, you feel only contempt for Greene.

For you had always read that passage imagining yourself as Sarah. And someone else, some misfortunate Maurice Bendrix, had fallen into your lap, and he was the ‘you’. But not you, never you. And it’s that pride which deceives. That pride which lulls us into false senses of security.

Joel says your name then.

Says, “Can I speak with you?” You, you, you.

And it should feel like relief, to hear your name on his lips again. But you catch the way he spares another glance, soft and sympathetic, in Rachel’s direction, and that sickly hurt isn’t abated.

Her face falls, but she smiles at you. Nods her permission for you to leave the room, and only when you’re halfway across the lecture theatre, bag swung over your shoulder, does she continue speaking to the class.

Palm flat against the door, he holds it open for you, making you press against him as you slip out of the room. It clicks shut behind you and he begins to move down the hall, leaving you to follow behind with no explanation. You assume that he’s going to lead you to his office, or anywhere more private than this, but a metre from the door Joel pauses abruptly, turns, and you slam into his chest with a huff.

“Jesus,” you mutter, stumbling a few steps back.

“Where have you been?” he glowers, brows drawn tight and angry over his eyes.

“What?”

“I’ve been busy,” you grit, glaring back. “Where have you been?”

“Busy?” he scoffs, shaking his head. “Yeah, I’ve been busy too. Busy teachin’ the classes that you don’t even show up for.”

“I’ve been sick,” you roll your eyes, unable—or perhaps just unwilling—to stray from nastiness, from spite. “My apologies, Professor.” 

“Don’t—” Joel snaps, and flinches as quickly as the word comes out of his mouth, surprised by how harsh it sounds in the air between the two of you. He takes a step closer, voice low now—“Don’t call me that.”

“Fuck, what is your problem?” you huff, eyes widening, exasperated. “I missed two classes, it’s not a big deal.”

“And the silence?” Joel takes a step forward as he says it. Close enough now to see the smudges on the lens of his glasses. Close enough to see the muscle in his jaw twitch. Too close for public; too close for here. “Can’t even text me back, huh? What the hell is goin’ on with you?”

Your body pulls taut at that, hands balling into fists at your sides.

“Oh, you don’t like silence?” you hiss, matching his volume. “You can’t be serious. Joel, I didn’t hear from you for days after New York. Why would I waste my breath when it’s obvious you don’t want to fucking hear from me?”

“It was barely two days,” he shakes his head, shakes off the insinuation, shakes off whatever blame you’re trying to put on him.

“Two days,” you nod, smirking angrily. “Two days after we spent an entire weekend together. Two days after we kissed and fucked and practically went on a date.”

And the word date must elicit something in him. Some minute, man-brain trigger that snaps him to attention and helps him understand the hurt on your face, the tremble in your hands. Because he says your name, voice softening, posture loosening, every bit of his body language screaming out that he wants to step forward and touch you.

And he’s speaking again, voice low, but there’s people coming down the hall, heading your way. Two figures that you can’t make out through the haze of Joel in your immediate vision. So when he reaches out and touches your hand you flinch, jutting your chin over his shoulder. A warning. Don’t do this here.

One of them calls your name and you pause, mouth open. Drag your eyes away from Joel’s features to watch the figures get closer.

“Pete,” you force a smile. “Hey.”

You realise quickly how it must look; your sullen expression, Joel staring down at you with his shoulders hunched. He must understand at the same moment, because he takes a quick step away, folds his hands behind his back.

“Hey,” Pete takes a step closer. He glances warily between you and Joel, confusion colouring his face. “Everything cool?”

Stony faced, Joel looks between the two of you, posture stiffening the longer he stares at Pete. So much larger than him, taller and broader and far more intimidating. But a man with a secret to keep isn’t one to jump quickly at confrontation, so he keeps his mouth shut. Let’s you do the talking.

Ian catches your eye over Pete’s shoulder and offers a sleazy sort of smile. You swallow down a glare and hold Pete’s gaze.

“Everything’s fine,” you lie, taking a step towards them. A step away from Joel. “What’s up, what are you guys doing in this building?”

Pete��s eyebrows pull together, and he cocks his head at you. “Said you needed a ride home today. This morning, remember?”

“This morning,” you repeat, nodding slowly. You raise your hand and pinch the bridge of your nose, thinking quickly, mind a mess. “I, uh… right, look, Pete, I actually forgot I have a meeting with Professor Miller about my final essay this afternoon.”

“Your final…” Pete trails off, frowning. “Isn’t that due in like a month?”

“Yeah,” you say vaguely, and do not look at Joel. “I’ll find a way home later, okay?”

“I mean, sure. I guess,” Pete agrees reluctantly, reaching up to grip the strap of his satchel. “Call me if you need me okay?”

And Joel’s face turns to stone at the insinuation in those words. The idea that Pete could give you anything he couldn’t. That anyone would need to swoop in and save you from him.

The pair of you stand in silence for a moment, eyes trained on Pete and Ian’s retreating backs as they head down the hall. You watch and watch until they turn the corner, disappearing from sight, and only then do you exhale a breath of relief.

You contemplate leaving him there. Turning your back on him and returning to Rachel’s lecture, ignoring his texts and letting this all fade into some painful memory. But when you look at him again—at those big brown eyes that gaze back at you—you know you couldn’t if you tried.  

“You look tired,” he frowns, and it’s not angry anymore. A little sad, maybe.

“I am,” you admit, and wonder if your face betrays how much of a role he plays in that exhaustion.

“Are you hungry?”

You stare for a moment, blinking slow, and then say, “Yeah.”

Joel nods, attempts a crooked smile, and says, “Let me take you to get something to eat.”

It’s silent in Joel’s car, aside from the soft patter of rain against his windows and the dull squeak of his windscreen wipers sliding it away. The truck glides through the winding streets of Biddeford, cruising down the main road and into the left lane of a fast-food drive thru. Orders you a burger, fries, nothing for himself, passing the bag into your lap and then continuing to drive.

The bun is soft beneath your fingers. Grease soaks your skin, and you taste beef, taste onions so soft, so sweet. A crimson dot of ketchup spattered onto your pants; a bright shock of mustard on your tongue. A fry here and there. Joel’s hand, outstretched fingers, sneaking across the centre console to steal one. You shift the paper bag on your lap, tilt the opening so it faces him, easier to access, but he doesn’t take another.

He grips the wheel and asks, “Do you want me to take you home?”

You think about Pete waiting for you at the house. Think about if Ian and that filthy smirk on his face and whether or not he’ll be there too. Think about having to flesh out your excuse, your lie, and finally say, “No.”

Joel keeps driving. You eat until your pants feel tight and the greasy brown bag is crumpled in your fist and he’s pulling his truck off the road and into a short driveway.  

“Full?”

“Very.”

“Good.”

“Is this your house?”

“This is it.” He drags the keys out of the ignition and knocks the door open. It’s not long, barely a second, before he’s pulling yours open with a rough yank and a soft, “Door always sticks on this side.”

A vague sound spills from the back of your throat, and he guides you up a path towards the small home. Single storey, with a large brown door and windows decorating the outward façade. Your immediate thought is that it’s very Joel, but you stop the idea in its tracks. Remind yourself that maybe it isn’t your place to think things like that.

Inside it’s even more silent, even more tense. The two of you stand in the entry way, toeing off damp shoes. Your eyes flit around his front room, but it’s difficult to focus on anything. Too much to look at, too much you want to know, and you find it easier to just look at him.  

“Realised you’d never been here,” Joel murmurs after a while. He shifts awkwardly on his feet, decidedly unsure of what to say as he rests beneath the weight of your stare. “This is the, uh, the livin’ room. Kitchen’s over there.”

When you don’t respond, he clears his throat, ticks his head towards the hallway. “Bathroom is down the hall. Bedroom too.”

You feel your face shift. Deadpan stare turns to surprise, to incredulity, to blatant anger.

“Oh, the bedroom, huh?” you smile, sardonic, cutting. Your throat feels tight. “S’that seriously why you brought me here? Ice me out and then come crawling back when you want something to fuck again?”

“Woah, hey,” his eyebrows shoot up, hands drifting forward like he’s trying to calm a startled animal.

“Don’t,” you hold up a shaking hand, eyes wide and wet suddenly. “Just… don’t touch me right now, okay? What are we doing here, Joel? Seriously.”   

He says your name hard and fast, surprised by how quickly it’s all unravelling, spilling from you in a tidal wave.

And spill it does. The words are wet and watery, a tsunami of pent up emotions pouring from your mouth without permission, without forethought.

“I mean, we haven’t seen each other since New York. And I… I thought being there changed things between us. But maybe I was wrong… and then you pull me out of a lecture, bring me here and say my bedroom is down the hall? Am I just… do you just like having someone to fuck whenever you want? Is that it? Someone at your beck and call?”

Joel repeats your name, sharper this name. “Don’t put fuckin’ words in my mouth.” His face pinches in anger, hands dropping.

“When it’s not convenient you try to shake me off, but when it is—at a bar, or out of town—” you list them off on your fingers, eyes growing wider and wider. “Oh, you want me then?”

“That ain’t fuckin’ true and you know it—”

“Do I?” you scoff.

“I came that night when you texted,” he implores, voice raising, all wild-eyed and pleading. “You were drunk, and textin’ and you needed a ride.”

“I didn’t ask you to do that—”

“You didn’t ask me not too either,” he crosses his arms across his chest. “You wanted me to come. Don’t fuckin’ deny that now.”

You open your mouth but he’s too quick, matching your spill with his own now.

“And as if you’re any better?” he bares his teeth now, voice low. “As if you didn’t find out I was your teacher and keep fuckin’ me just for the thrill of it. As if you actually wanted me, and you weren’t just gettin’ off on chasin’ some forbidden fantasy.”

“I…” you gape at him, unafraid to let the hurt show on your face. “Is that really what you think of me?”

“What the fuck am I supposed to think?” he hisses, exhaustion evident in the way he runs a hand through his curls and sags against the door. “You tellin’ me I should believe that you just want me for what I am? A fifty-year-old teacher who spends his time giving fuckin’ speeches to people that are hardly listenin’? Who goes home to an empty bed? That’s what you want?”

And it deflates you, a little. The wounded expression on his face – the devastating truth in those words, splashed across his expression so plainly for you to see. Disbelief.

“Is that such a crime?” you ask quietly. “To want you… and have it be that simple?”

“You shouldn’t,” he shakes his head. Grimaces. “You shouldn’t want me, I’m—I’m no good for you.”

You swallow. Feel tears hot and sharp behind your eyes.

“Then why do you keep letting me?”

“Jesus,” he exhales, and his hand is on the hem of your shirt, pulling you closer, closer, until you’re pressed against his chest, hands coming up to grip his shoulders and steady yourself. “Because I can’t fuckin’ quit you, alright?”

“Because I don’t just want you when it’s convenient,” his lips curl around the word, disgusted by the insinuation. “Because I think about you all the god damn time and if I can only have you some of the time then I guess I’ll take it. Because if you want some fucked up fantasy, then I’ll play my part if it means I get you, I don’t care—”

You cut him off, lips firm and searing against his. He goes still for a moment, mouth parting with a surprised exhale, warm when you press inside with your tongue. And then warmer, salty; tears on his cheeks, on yours.

“That’s not what this is,” you whimper into his mouth, desperate for him to believe it. “It was never about that, it was about you, Joel. I want you.”

He kisses you again, slow. All of the anger and hurt and frustration pools out of the both of you, spilling from your mouths and into the air. His lips mould over yours and his hands are warm on your waist, your back, holding you tight against his chest. When you sniffle, he pulls back, forehead heavy against yours, and sighs.

“I’m sorry,” he rasps, eyes closed. “I missed you, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean for—"

“Where were you?” you interrupt. “What happened in New York?”

He hesitates for a moment, nervous and calculating as he stares you down.

You wilt a little; dejected all over again. Recoil from him and quietly ask, “Why won’t you let me know you?” 

Joel’s hand hovers in the air, as if contemplating reaching for you again, but then it drops and he says, “I was with my daughter.”  

You blink.

Daughter.

Daughter?

“She lives there now,” Joel sounds a little breathless, cheeks pink as the words spill from him. “In New York, with her girlfriend. I’d planned to spend an extra day there with her, and then Nina—Nina cut her hand open at the studio and we had to go to the ER, and she had to get stitches and—” He pauses, waiting for you to jump in, to interrupt, to say anything. When you don’t, he takes a breath and continues. “And I wasn’t gonna stay any longer but Ellie was worried, and she needed me. She needed me there, and—and I’m never fuckin’ there, because she never needs me anymore. So I stayed, and I’m sorry I went silent but I was… I was takin’ care of my kid.” 

You think it might be the longest—and the fastest—you’ve ever heard him speak outside of a lecture hall.

His eyes drift to something over your shoulder and his entire body seems to sag a little. But it isn’t sad. It’s a resigned, sort of relaxed thing that happens – the corners of his mouth tilt up and he smiles weakly.

You turn, follow his eyeline until you see them.

Pictures, so many pictures, lining the walls of his home. Ones you’d paid no attention to when you first stepped inside, but can now see clearly. Bright eyes and wide toothy grins.

Some of Joel younger, leaner, smiling beside a little girl with curly hair. Some of him as you know him now; scruffy and greying, beside a different girl. This one lanky and pale and grimacing toward the camera as if she were forced into being placed in front of it.

There’s one picture of the girls beside each other, teenagers maybe, sat on either end of a seesaw. The curly-haired girl is on the upper end, grinning madly at the lens, while the other sits with her feet planted firmly on the ground, laughing up at her. Two of them. Two daughters?

“Please say somethin’.”

There’s a picture of Joel and he’s holding a tiny little bundle in his arms, and he looks so young and so fucking afraid. Dark eyes wide and teary as he gazes down at chubby cheeks, his index fingers crooked around the edge of her swaddle. A warm feeling swells in your chest and your body softens the longer you look at it. He’s a father.

Joel says your name and when you turn his face is all twisted up, and he looks the smallest you’ve ever seen him. Almost curled in on himself.

“I should’ve told you,” he nods, brown eyes darting across your face in an attempt to decipher your silence. “I know that, and I—”

“I’m an asshole,” you interrupt softly, and the tears never left but now they feel heavier on your waterline. Begging to spill over again.

“Hey,” he frowns, hand coming up to cup your cheek. His thumb swipes at the soft skin beneath your eye, begging the wetness there to disappear. “Hey, hey, no—”

“I didn’t think…” you trail off, sniffling. A sickly cocktail of embarrassment and guilt and shame swirl in the pit of your stomach and you try to swallow it down, try to send it away, but it’s persistent. “I never stopped to think that something had actually happened, that you had… I feel selfish, Joel, I’m sorr—”

“You’re not,” he hushes, fingers curling into the hair behind your ear. “You didn’t know. I should’ve told you before, and I’m sorry.”

“I thought you were staying away because of me,” you offer a watery smile. “I thought maybe you and…” You can’t bring yourself to finish the sentence. Can’t make your lips form the name Rachel.

“No,” he shakes his head, jaw tight, as if reading your mind.

“Is she okay?”

“Ellie?”

“Ellie,” you roll the name around in your mouth. His daughter.  “Yeah.”

“She’s okay,” he smiles, nodding. “They’re both fine.”

“And…” You look back at the pictures. Two. “And the other girl?”

“Sarah,” Joel says softly, pointing at wild curls and brown eyes that look just like his. And he must see the questions swirling in your brain because he speaks again. “I was twenty. My, uh, my girlfriend at the time didn’t know what to do. Didn’t wanna be a Mom, but didn’t agree with abortion, and we were so young and… well, I asked her to marry me cause it felt like the right thing to do, but she didn’t…” he shakes his head a little, a faraway look in his eye as he remembers it. “She said no. She never wanted that… so, after Sarah was born, I told her that she didn’t have to.”

“Didn’t have to?” you repeat the words, eyebrows furrowing.

“Didn’t have to stay,” he clarifies. Your lips part, surprised. “So, she didn’t, and we ain’t seen her since Sarah was a few months old.”

“Shit,” you whisper, eyes widening as the information finally starts to sink in.

“And Ellie,” he laughs then, gazing at a picture of auburn locks and shock grey eyes. “Well, that one showed up on my door some time fifteen years later. Been in ‘n’ outta foster care for years, and just started followin’ Sarah home from school one day. We did this little dance for a while; dinners and sleepovers and me slipping money into her backpack so she could buy lunch at school. And then one day she just… begged me not to make her go back to her own house. So I didn’t.”

“Wow, I…” you blink. “You adopted her? Alone?”

“I…” Joel pauses. Wets his lips, frowning as he collects his thoughts. “Alone is… I don’t think that’s the right word for it. You see Ellie was… Sarah and me, we just knew. She was family so fast. It was the only thing that made sense, you know?”

And it does, you suppose. The image isn’t hard to conjure. Joel at the dinner table with two teenagers on either side of him. Arguing over homework, over curfews, over what movie to watch. You can see the fondness in his eyes as he talks about them – the emotion laced through his words; we just knew.

“Tell me what you’re thinkin’,” Joel says, and that line between his eyebrows is back and it’s so deep that you can’t help yourself from reaching up and smoothing it over with your thumb. He catches your hand and holds it against the centre of his chest. Lets you feel the way his heart thuds heavily beneath the skin, a sturdy rhythm against your palm.

“It’s… it’s a lot to take in,” you confess, and his hand tightens over yours. “But I’m glad you told me.”

Brown eyes search yours, gaze heavy. “You sure?”

“Yeah,” you nod. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

“Okay then.” 

You flex your palm against his chest. Dig your fingers into the flesh there a little.

“Can I…” he hesitates, eyes flickering down. “Do you… Can I kiss you?” You, you, you.

Your heart beats fast, and you feel his do the same, and Joel is a father, and two daughters, and I can’t fuckin’ quit you, and you’re breathing into his mouth yes, yes you can kiss me, please kiss me.

It’s warm and it’s gentle and it feels like such a kindness to kiss him now and feel less space between the two of you. Feels like a thousand apologies and explanations slipping off his tongue and you opening your arms to him, saying I understand, saying thank you for telling me.

And when you pull him closer, wrapping an arm around the back of his neck, he meets you in kind, pressing your back against the wall. He shifts his hips between yours and shows you how much he’s missed you, and only when his hand drifts beneath the hem of your shirt do you pause.

He stills, warm breaths drifting across your mouth as he looks into your eyes.

“Talk to me.”

“I’m exhausted,” you admit shyly, twisting a finger through a frizzy lock of hair at the nape of his neck. You tug at it, not meeting his eye, and watch it bounce back into a curl when you let go. He nods and kisses you again, closed lips soft and not asking for anything, never asking for more than you want to give, before he takes your hand and leads you through his house for the first time.

He runs you a bath. Makes you sit on the edge while he lays out a towel and checks the temperature every few minutes. Only when he’s satisfied that the water is perfectly warm does he help peel the clothing from your body. He grips your hand and helps you step into the tub, lowering you down into sudsy water. And when you’re settled, he pulls a stool nearby and sits, keeping you company as you soak.   

“S’nice,” you tell him quietly, dragging a foamy sponge across your arms. “Thank you, Joel.”

The weight of before hangs over you a little, pressing down against your shoulders as you watch him. Gauge him. But he doesn’t seem angry or upset anymore. He leans over the lip of the tub. Runs his hands through the water, over the skin of your calf, your knee. Feels the coarse hairs that have grown there over the past fortnight and smiles when they scratch against his palm.

“Said you were sick?”

“Mhm.”

“What kind?”

“Just a cold,” you whisper. He squeezes your knee, palm against your patella, fingers soft in the flesh around it. “M’fine. Past it now.”

In the soapy water, his skin feels like silk against yours.

“Changin’ of the season,” he muses with a nod. “Normally gets me too.” 

And you laugh a little at that, because it’s such a fatherly thing to say and you can’t believe how naïve you’d been to not see it before. Can suddenly picture him doing this a thousand times over; resting by the bath while one of his little girls floats in the water, nose all stuffy from the flu.

At the sound of your laughter he smiles, gaze dropping to your mouth, and the skin beside his eyes pinches. Little wrinkles, so soft and so beautiful that you want to reach out and brush your fingers across them.

“You’re so beautiful,” Joel murmurs, and his voice is hushed, so low in the small bathroom.

His fingers skirt against the inside of your thigh and you splay your legs open for him, knees knocking against the sides of the tub. He glances down through the water to where you’re spread open for him to see, shameless, and smiles.

“So fuckin’ beautiful,” he repeats.

“So are you, Joel.”

“Psh,” he rolls his eyes, offering a delicate little smile. So shy, so feeble, and so desperate to believe you. A little glimpse of that wary weight, still pressing down on him as well.

“Mean it,” you insist in a whisper. You lift a hand from the water, wet thumb grazing the corner of his mouth. Feel the bristles of his moustache, the hairs on his cheek, prickling against your skin.

“Swoony type,” you say, smiling when recognition flashes in his eyes. Stroke the fresh blush on his cheeks. “Long hair, bedroom eyes, cheeks like wine.”

“Hmm,” he murmurs, turning to press a kiss against your palm. “Can’t get away with plagiarisin’ Carson in this house, baby.”

“She just said it so well.”

“She did,” he agrees. “So did Tartt.”

“Tartt?” your mind wanes, the warm water lulling you into a sleepy sort of daze. You rest heavy against the side of the bath, gazing up at him

“Beauty is terror,” he quotes tenderly, eyes bold and earnest as he holds your stare. “Whatever we call beautiful, we quiver before it.”

You wrap an arm around his shoulders, water droplets staining his shirt where your fingers grip the material, and pull him forward to kiss you. Joel grips the inside of your leg and kisses you until your skin prunes and wrinkles. And when he notices he laughs with you, gripping your hand to press his lips against fingertips that look like raisins. Worships the soaked skin of your fingers until you pull his face back to yours; jealous of your own hands, fearful that they might come to know his kiss better than your lips.

And when the water goes lukewarm and you don’t know what time it is anymore, he dries you off with a soft towel and offers once more to take you home. But you say no, so he smiles and kisses you again—your lips, your cheeks, your eyelids—and leads you to his bedroom.

He drags a too-big shirt over your head, helps you loop your arms into the sleeves. Dark blue and warm, so warm, against your skin.

The two of you slip beneath the covers on his bed and he drags you against his side; lets you press your cold toes against his shins without so much as a flinch.

Facing each other on your sides, those hands slink beneath the shirt, rough palms cradling your ribs, your back, holding you tight against his chest until your breathing falls in sync. And those hands don’t stray, don’t move down, they just embrace you. A carefully held apology that promises I want this, to hold you, to be with you, too.

It stays like that, nothing more, until your eyelids are heavy, and his breathing has evened out. Stays like that until your hand drops from his back to the band of his boxers, sleepy little fingers plucking at the material, trying to slip underneath.

“You should rest.”

But you whine softly; needy and insistent as your fingers press harder.

“What do you need?” Joel rasps into your neck, helping you shift them down his legs.

“Need you,” you whisper back into the darkness of his bedroom. “Wanna feel you, I—”

His mouth is soft against yours, plucking those words from your mouth and swallowing them down. He sucks your bottom lip between his, prying your mouth open so he can slip his tongue inside.

His hand in on your knee, pulling your leg up until your thigh rests heavy around his hip and you can feel the hot weight of him against your core, still slick and warm and needy from when his hand rested on the inside of your leg in the bath.

And if you’d ever subscribed to the meaning behind words like sin you suppose that once this might have counted as one. An act worthy of being sent to reside in that second circle of hell, reserved solely for those overcome by lust; left to blow back and forth in the storm of their own desire. Two people who cannot touch, should not touch, who hold their hands out to feel anyways. A touch once spiteful, once desolate and removed, now so forthcoming. A touch that says this is the only way it could have ever been. And there can be nothing sinful about it anymore. No more shame or derision behind heavy eyelids, no more you shouldn’t or I’m no good for you. Here you rest comfortably in the hurricane of that second circle, and you welcome the breeze as a comfort.

Lips against yours, Joel feeds his cock to you in slow, careful passes.

Ensures you feel every ridge, every hard line of his body. And with each gentle press inside he murmurs against your mouth. Incessant, low nonsenses of so fuckin’ beautiful and god I missed you and that’s it, baby, I know, I know. His kiss smooth as an almond, tender as a fig. Ripe and wet and tremulous as his tongue finds a home against yours, over and over.

The comforter on his bed stays pulled high, up to your shoulders, and it traps the warmth of your bodies between you.

He coaxes rough, gasping sounds from you with every shift of his hips.

Long fingers grip the back of your thigh, using his hold there to rock your body into his over and over again, slowly, making sure you feel every second of it. Slick seeps out of you around his length, smearing against the inside of your thighs and his, and he groans at the wet sounds that slip from where the two of you are connected.

Joel says your name, low and gravelly, praising every syllable. He tells you how good it feels, how perfect you are, and every word is like an undressing of the flesh. Like you’re some tender butcher, peeling back layers of his skin to let the air hit hot, red, pulsating matter, flashes of thick, porcelain bone swimming amongst it all. He keeps you close, hardly an inch of your body not touching his, and yet you can see all of him. The whole surface and everything underneath it now too. And when you say his name in return and he moans, begs you to say it again, say my name again, it’s hearts on wings, thin fire racing beneath the skin, eyes unseeing, drumming filling your ears. It’s the cold sweat on his hands that hold you shaking, that feel the way you tremble and grip tighter. It’s wanting to take those bones of his and suck them clean; lick past the gristle and taste the marrow beyond it.

It's everything and it’s nothing and it’s that silly little four-letter word that you can’t bring yourself to say, let alone think, and it doesn’t even matter because he’s here and that’s enough.

His nose rests in the hollow above your collarbone and he inhales, smothering soft kisses to skin and bone there.

He says, “You smell like me,” and when he looks up and presses his forehead against yours, he almost looks wounded by it. He stills, holds himself deep inside and just stares, and his eyes are screaming I can’t fuckin’ quit you, so you lay your thumb over the dimple on his cheek and smile. “S’my clothes, my soap…”

Your body flutters and tightens around him, and your mouths fall open in soft moans, lips slotting together again.

“You like that?” you breathe into the kiss, and he tightens his fist around the back of the shirt, pressing inward until your back is arched, and your stomach is flush against his and he’s groaning yes.

“Want you in my clothes all the fuckin’ time,” he pants, and the tip of his cock presses so deep inside that you’re gasping, mouth hanging wide open. “And when you give ‘em back I’ll wear ‘em and smell like you, and then we’ll be even.”

“Even?” you laugh a little, nipping at his bottom lip. He smiles, eyes glinting in the darkness.

“Yeah, even,” he repeats it and presses forward in a sharp thrust to emphasise his point. You don’t need to hear it again to know exactly what he means.

“Tell me you’re mine,” you whisper, and he grunts, hips shifting a little faster against yours. You feel him pulse inside of you, his stomach tightening against yours.

“M’yours,” Joel murmurs, voice like velvet and honey, so soft as he leans forward to kiss you, licking the words into your mouth. You say it back, spell it out against his teeth, his lips, his jaw. Yours, yours, yours. 

He says something else then, lips soft against your chin, and you’re so close; can feel it hot and burning in your gut, almost at tipping point.

“Hmm?”

“Baby,” Joel nips at your jaw, sharpening your senses. “Tell me you’re on the pill or somethin’.”

“I am,” you whimper honestly, and his body seems to sag against yours, hips shifting in sluggish, tired movements.

Something snaps at the base of your spine, and you tremble against him, gripping the back of his neck. Soon enough he’s shuddering into you, arms going tight around your back, trapping you against his chest as his cock pumps inside your core. And it’s warm and wet and sticky and his seed drools out of you, down to your asshole, smearing against the inside of your thighs, his sheets. Your legs wrap around his waist, holding him to you, keeping him there as long as you possibly can. Riding out your highs, and then the trembling, stuttering aftershocks in each other’s arms. He pants into your mouth and all either of you can say is mine or yours, until the words mix together and become a meaningless blur of sound murmured between locked lips.

It could be minutes or an entire hour before you manage to separate from each other. All eager little kisses and whines as his soft cock slips from your hold, thick spend seeping out of you in his absence. And you just want to sleep, want to curl up in his arms and never leave, but you slink off to the bathroom first. Wet your face and drop down on his toilet. Urinate and feel his come drip out of you. And where once, with someone else, you might have cringed at the feeling, you only feel warmth; calm.

In the bright lighting of his bathroom, you can see yourself reflected in the mirror above his sink. Hair a wild mess, cheeks and lips swollen with warmth. This woman in the mirror stares back at you and she has bright eyes. She smiles at you, and you feel your lips peel back, teeth on show just like hers. You stare at her and think god, she looks happy. When you wipe between your thighs and stand, she does too. And with your finger on the light switch, a wet handtowel clutched in your other palm, you give her one last look before turning out the light, feeling lighter than you have in weeks.

Thursday.

Joel sleeps on his stomach. At least, that’s how he ends up overnight.

Face buried deep in a pillow, one leg slung outside of the covers, with a heavy arm out to the side. When you wake, at first, you’re careful not to move. Not to breathe too heavily, not to cough or jostle him awake. He looks so peaceful like this. Heavy breaths puffing from chapped pouty lips, forehead smooth and devoid of the stress and exhaustion that often lines his face. A large hand rests close to you. Despite you drifting a part in the night, the body heat getting too much for you both, his fingers remain outstretched in your direction. The tips just grazing the skin of your stomach as you lie on your side and watch him.

A low murmur escapes from his mouth, face twitching a little, and then he’s relaxing again, humming in his sleep. You smile, and let your eyes wander.

There’s a pile of books on his bedside table, reading glasses dropped haphazardly atop them.

An Idiot’s Guide to Space, one of the weathered spines reads. Interesting.

A framed painting rests above a set of drawers on the side of his room. A vast landscape with a herd of horses galloping across it. Gorgeous hides of orange and brown and black splashed across green grass and blue sky. And on the back of his door… hangs a cowboy hat.

You move slowly, careful not to wake him as you rise and tip toe across the room. Coming to rest directly in front of the closed door, you slip it off the hook and admire it. You don’t even hear his breathing change as he wakes up.

Dark brown with a curved brim; the felt is soft beneath your fingers. The image of Joel wearing it, perhaps often, while living in Texas flits through your mind and you can’t help but smile. And then warm hands are on your hips, arms snaking around your waist to pull you back into a warm chest.

You gasp in quiet surprise, but your smile only broadens when Joel rests his chin on your shoulder, peering down at the hat in your hands.

“Mornin’,” he murmurs, voice gruff and deeper than usual. A pang of arousal swims in your core at the sound of it, but you ignore that, turning in his grasp.

“Good morning, cowboy.”

Joel groans, sleepy eyes drifting closed as he hugs you to his chest, swaying the two of you from side to side.

“Wanted to lie in,” he grumbles. “S’too early for this.”

“For what?” you blink in mock confusion, holding the hat against your chest.

“For you to see that.” He moves quick, tugging it from your grasp.

“Hey—” You gasp, wide eyed and ready to steal it back. But before you can Joel just lifts it onto his head with a heavy sigh. “Oh.”

“Oh?” he repeats, eyes narrowing.

Warmth simmers in your stomach and you smirk, stepping back to give him a quick once over.

“I could get used to this.”

“Jesus,” he rolls his eyes, moving to take it off but you grip his hand, shaking your head fiercely.

“Not so fast,” you coo. “I want the whole experience.”

“And what exactly is the whole experience?”

“You know—” You shimmy your hips a little. Imitate twirling a lasso in the air, wiggling your eyebrows. “Show me some tricks.”

Joel laughs at you, and you can see the desire in him to say no, to refute it, but the longer you stare him down, the more it cracks and fizzles away.  

“Go on, cowboy,” you try out your best Texan drawl, falling down to sit on the edge of his bed.  

He adjusts his legs, elbows bending as he waves two finger guns in your direction. You suck your lips into your mouth, swallowing down a laugh as he makes a small pchew pchew noise out the side of his mouth.

“Oh,” you smirk. “Is that all you got?”

“I’ll have you know,” Joel huffs, pretending to holster one of his guns. Hip cocked now, still dressed in nothing but his sleep shirt and boxers; he stares you down. “I’m startin’ to think this town ain’t big enough for the both of us.”

And that gets you. A sharp, barking laughs slips from your mouth, and Joel grins in return, the skin beside his eyes creasing as he adjusts the Stetson over his curls.

As your giggles calm, he just shakes his head, still smiling, and murmurs fondly, “Dadgum, you got a good laugh.”

Your face warms beneath his stare, and you just shake your head, bottom lip snagged between your teeth. Moving quick, Joel pinches the brim of the hat and places it onto your head. It’s a little big, and the brim falls down, obscuring your eyesight before he adjusts it for you. Then he takes a step back, hands on hips.

“How do I look?” You bat your eyelashes up at him, smiling shyly.

“I don’t know,” he fakes an air of contemplation, giving you a long look up and down. “Think you might be all hat ‘n’ no cattle.”

“Hey,” you pout. “I’d make a great cowboy; just need a pair of chaps.”

“Well, you can wear the hat and the chaps all you like,” Joel murmurs, gaze heavy. “But you ain’t a cowboy ‘til you prove you can ride like one.”

Your thighs tense and you arch an eyebrow, trying to remain nonchalant.

“Is that right?”

“S’right.”

“Mm,” you hum. You lick your bottom lip and watch the way his gaze darkens, eyes trained on the movement. “Gonna let me show you what I got?”

And so you end up back in bed, straddling Joel while he smirks up at you, long fingers twisting around the hem of your t-shirt. But when you slip a finger inside the hem of his boxers, the movement so reminiscent of last night, he laughs a little and gives you a look that says, really?

You pout, confused. “I thought you wante—”

“Uh uh,” Joel shakes his head. “Not what I meant.”

“Then what?”

“Get up here.” He lifts his chin upward.

Your eyes widen, stomach tensing a little.

Desire warms the inside of your thighs, and you murmur, “You want that?”

“Do I wa—?” he cuts himself off, eyes darkening a shade. “I said, get up here.”

Heart racing, you shimmy up his chest until your knees are planted on the mattress on either side of his shoulders. He smiles, encouraging, and you grip the hem of his shirt, prepared to pull it over your head, but he stops you.

“No,” he exhales, hand quickly gripping yours. “Leave it on for me.” And then he leans in and presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh, and you can only nod, holding your breath as you wait for him to reach where you want his mouth the most.

Face tucked in the cradle of your hips, Joel sighs your name. A rough exhalation, nose pressed into your skin. And it feels a little silly at first – your face is warm as you stare down at him, the wide brim of the cowboy hat tilting forward.

But then, breath hot and heavy against you, he mouths at the crease where your hip meets your thigh. Slow, drawn-out kisses that have your legs tensing over him, his hands slip beneath the shirt, tracing light patterns into the skin over your spine, all the way up to your shoulders. He keeps going until you’re shivering, a wet trembling mess in his hands, hips twitching forward with every touch of his mouth to your skin until he finally glides his tongue through your folds.

Your breathing hitches as he pants against you, chest vibrating with low sounds as he licks thick stripes up the entire length of your pussy. Eyes closed, he tastes all of you; tongue slipping over every piece of exposed skin that the position grants him. And with every broad stroke of his tongue, he dips inside your weeping hole and finishes with a gentle flick against your clit. So soft and so slow, building you up over and over until finally you break and begin rocking your hips into his face.  

Joel grunts at first, a little surprised maybe, but in a second his hands are dropping to grip your thighs, locking you in place against his face.

At first, he guides you. Helps you find a rhythm that works, that feels good. Flattens his tongue and uses his grip to rock you back and forth over his face, groaning as you roll your clit against him, huffing and panting quiet little pleas. But soon enough your fingers are carding through his hair, holding him tight against you as you grind down into his mouth. Sharpening his tongue, he dips it inside of you and then drags upward, pulling your clit into his mouth and sucking gently.

You gasp, vision going hazy as you try to keep your eyes on him, try to watch, but it’s too good. He knows exactly what you like, and it all moves far too quickly for your liking. You can already feel your hips winding faster and harder against him, breaths falling shorter, everything in your stomach pulling tight and hot.

Joel can tell – he can always fucking tell – and one of his hands drifts over your ass, fingers slipping between your thighs from behind until his middle finger is circling your entrance.

“Fuck,” you inhale sharply, jaw going slack as he prods at your cunt, tongue lapping lazily over your clit all the while. “Please, your fingers, yeah, ohhh—”

A long finger sinks inside and you moan, head falling back.

“You like that?” he murmurs, pulling back to graze his teeth along the inside of your thigh. A second finger presses inside, and he curls them against that soft spot, fucking you slow and steady until you acquiesce, whimpering yesyesyesfucksogood towards the ceiling.

“Good girl,” he hums, slick tongue finding its way back to your clit.

He eats at you so lovingly. So generous as he lathes firm circles around your nerves, only ever pausing to suck you into his mouth again or press wet, open-mouthed kisses against the entirety of your cunt. Nose buried in the short curls over your mound, he doesn’t let up until your moans turn high pitched; strained little whimpers of his name falling from your lips as you press down harder and harder.

“Oh fuck,” you cry, hips rocking back and forth, faster now. He breathes you in, jaw shifting from side to side, matching the intensity of your movements with sharp flicks of his tongue. And when you fall apart, shoulders sagging forward, he moans, taking and taking and taking every last drop of what you have to offer.

And what an image it must be – you, wearing a Stetson, riding Joel Miller’s face. You almost wish you’d filmed it, for posterity’s sake.

He presses a small kiss to one swollen lip of your pussy, and then the other, before his head is falling back into the pillows and he’s smiling up at you.

The lower half of his face shines, lips and facial hair slick with your come, and you can’t help but grin back, a tired snort of laughter slipping from your mouth.

“How’d I do?” You grip the brim of the hat, tipping it down at him.

Joel smirks, hands squeezing your thighs, helping to shift you up and onto the side of the bed so he can sit up.

“I’d say you more than proved yourself,” he hums, leaning in to steal a kiss. You sigh, whining against his warm wet mouth, and reach a hand down to press it against his abdomen. Shifting lower, you trail your fingers over where his cock strains against his boxers, but Joel just tuts, pulling away and slipping off the bed.  

“Hey,” you huff, gripping his shirt and trying to pull him back down, but he just shakes his head, laughing, and drags you to your feet.

“Gonna be late,” he tells you, squeezing your hips and pressing a kiss to your temple. “And you needa eat.”

Late. You’d almost forgotten that you had a lecture this morning. Joel’s lecture.

He turns, rifling in the chest of drawers, pulling out clothes, a pair of socks, while you stand behind him and watch, knees still shaking, with a fucking cowboy hat on your head. After a moment he turns, stares, and a rough laugh hits the air. Shaking his head, Joel grips the brim and tosses the hat back up on its hook before pointing towards the ensuite, telling you to shower.

“You coming?” you ask, and he just shakes his head, tugging on socks before padding towards the hallway.

“Cowboys don’t shower, baby,” he flashes a smile over his shoulder at you and winks. “They just dust off.” 

When you make your way out of the shower, Joel is in the kitchen. Ironed black trousers and a neat white shirt cover his frame, and from across the room you admire him. That strong back, the pert rounded muscles of his ass. Fuck.

He manages to over scramble the eggs and burn the bacon because he can’t stop looking over his shoulder at where you rest at his dining table. Head resting heavy in your palm, you smile back at him. And when he puts a plate of food in front of you, you don’t have a single complaint.

The two of you eat fast, plucking little pieces of eggshell out as you go, smiling and laughing shyly as your feet tangle beneath the table. He watches you; makes sure you clear your plate before he takes it to the sink, murmuring something about how he won’t make you sit through me talkin’ for hours on an empty stomach. Says he’s pretty sure that counts as torture somewhere, baby.

And when he turns, dirty dishes forgotten in the sink, you’re staring at him, heart on your sleeve, and he must see it in your eyes. You know that it has to be clear as day; that forbidden four-letter word blazing across your forehead in bold letters.

Joel clocks your gaze and moves to hover over where you sit, wordlessly cupping your face in two broad palms and slotting his mouth over yours. And as he licks into your mouth, tasting the remnants of eggs and bacon and every unsaid word, you start to believe that maybe confessing wouldn’t be so bad. That maybe forbidden is a word you’ve prescribed to this feeling all on your own – that he might just be feeling the exact same way.

But he pulls back, presses two more quick pecks to your mouth and tells you to get ready, says he’ll drive the two of you to school, and the moment slips from your grasp.  

Back in his car, you feel relieved to replace the memory of yesterday with this one. Windows down, the air is cool and calm against your skin as he drives you through town, sated, dopey smiles across both of your faces.

A Bob Dylan song drifts from the speakers and Joel sings along under his breath.

“We’ll meet again someday on the avenue. Tangled up in blue.” Voice low and breathy, left hand on the wheel, right hand on your thigh. You nod along to the lyrics, your fingers tracing the veins and tendons on the back of his hand all the way until he pulls over.

“Shouldn’t be seen walkin’ in together.”

“Yeah,” you agree, understanding. “Best not.”  

The truck idles on the side of the road, somewhere inconspicuous down the street from campus, and you slip out his passenger door. Close it with a thud and peer in at him through the open window, eyes devouring every part of his face as if you won’t be seeing him within the hour, stood up in front of the room giving a lecture.

The truck peels away from the curb, Tangled Up In Blue still whining from those speakers, and Joel sends a quick wink out the window at you, his face a blur as he drives off. And you just smile, chest warm despite the cool Spring air on your face, walking along in the same direction – because you know exactly what that wink means. And you love it.

Our little secret.

a/n refs:

in Dante’s Inferno he said that those overcome with lust were doomed to the second circle of hell, wherein they would be buffeted back and forth by the terrible winds of a violent storm, without rest. slay.

the bacchae tr. by anne carson [read if you have mummy issues, a massive ego, or just like the idea of frolicking in the woods for a while...]

the secret history by donna tartt [read if you like unreliable narrators, strange professors and stranger students, and the nursery rhyme 'the farmer in the dell']

the end of the affair by graham greene [read if you like weird intense guys and angst and infidelity]

eros the bittersweet by anne carson [read if you're cool as fuck]

thank you for reading! x

[t4t4t]

Hi !

I got bottom surgery on July 25th ! :3

I'm recovering really well ! I've been told I can walk around more but still can't bike/swim and strenuous things of that nature. I'm unsure when I can work again, or even what to do with my experience and wanting to be covid safe.... receptionist ? Idk. I'd work in a nursery but I doubt they'd hire me. I'd like to find something before my FFS on January 28th that would be sympathetic to my taking off some time for that, but I'm not sure how possible that is.

Collie and I will need rent help for October/food/gas/utilities/lube/pads/etc. We're broke rn after paying September rent/food/gas, after food stamps ran out... I got my stamps again by now but yeah, had to reapply for hers and she hasn't gotten it again yet... but yeah no money for transportation costs for appointments this week rn...

Collie withheld 300 that ended up as "hers" somehow in her mind for a week this past week because she kept on threatening to prefer being homeless and taking it, and like, the roommates were concerned we weren't going to pay rent because I wasn't saying anything because I didn't know what to say. She caved when it was expressed the roommates didn't have money to pay what was left.

I have no idea if we'll find a new place before her bottom surgery in November (she's been given the date of 11/13) but she's threatening still preferring homelessness to being here. She's saying she can't recover here because she doesn't feel safe because of an antagonistic roommate and I'm not sure how to respond to that.

We shouldn't be homeless... I'm not sure why she would prefer it. I'm not even sure she wants to be with me... we have to get rid of the broken van that gives her athsma attacks more than we need to leave because of a roommate that makes us both uncomfortable... I hope her mom helps with that soon but we haven't been given much explicit information how or when about that. We should try to sell the van but she threatens to pack up and leave almost every day...

We got rent in the nick of time last time (we had 622 before Sep 1 but yeah she did hold onto part of it for a week...), I think it's probably not impossible we get 6-900 again this month but I'm not sure I can expect donations enough for us to move like because of a deposit or smth...

It would be ideal if we could get help enough to feel comfortable enough to leave and that we find somewhere who's sympathetic to us not having a "proof of income" like where we are now is, and maybe they wouldn't have a deposit, but we'll see... OHP "Flex Fund" may respond for either of us but may not.

I also need 100 to pay for 6 months of the PO box we've had for the past 4 years of struggling to find housing and mostly being homeless.

Anything helps !

Thank you everyone so much, y'all have saved our lives. <3

0/922

https://www.paypal.me/NoraEstherRose

https://venmo.com/u/nora-esther-rose

https://www.paypal.me/androgynophore

https://venmo.com/u/Leah-Esther-Rose

[gilverrwrites]

“If you will have me, I am yours.” 

Pairing: Human!Castiel/Fem!Reader (Season 9)

Reader has AFAB body parts & feminine pronouns' are used.

Plot: The reader is a retired hunter, who develops feeling for Cas after he moves in with her. After living in domestic bliss for a while, its only a matter of time before feelings are confessed, and sex is had.

Please remember: to keep going, and keep growing.

Content: Rough/Kissing, blowjob, rough blowjob/face-fucking, vaginal fingering, p in v sex, dirty talk (Cas doesnt really have a filter) rough sex, swearing, accidental cuddling, intentional cuddling.

Rating: M/18+

Words: 3,377

Notice: The follow up: Takeout Tuesday is now available here.

Excerpt: You vaguely recall falling asleep around 40 minutes into a Capra film, but when and how you’d nestled yourself against your flatmate was a mystery. Despite your instinct to jerk away, you remain still when you feel his fingers brushing against your bare shoulder. Between the warmth of his skin on yours, and the soothing beat of his heart, you are soon lulled close to sleep once again. Until the sound of Cas’ low voice in your ear rouses you. “Are you awake?”  When you nod, he continues, “Is this okay?” You nod again, and quietly add, “This is wonderful.”

Having Castiel around was pleasant, if a little surreal. You’d always considered him a friend, but it wasn’t the same. Previously you’d only really been around each other on the hunt. Or if Cas was involved, more like stopping an apocalypse. Your relationship had been entirely based on proximity, and necessity. There was never really time to bond beyond that. Until now. 

You’d decided to attempt retirement a while ago. You’d found a job and started subletting a decent apartment from a friend of a friend, on the preface that they could still crash on the couch when travelling across country. The hunting trade was a small world after all. 

In fact, your new landlord was exactly who you’d expected to see when someone came knocking on your door in the middle of the night. Not a tired, bloodied, and bruised Angel. Confused, you’d let him in, patched his wounds, cleaned him up, and let him sleep it off in your bed. After almost 48 hours of continuous sleep, he’d explained everything to you, thanked you for your hospitality, and told you he’d be out of your hair soon. You’d assertively informed him that the only place he would be going is from your bed, to your couch. 

From there you easily fell into a routine together, effortlessly bonded over shared experiences, old and new. It was nice, seeing his toothbrush next to yours, bringing home his favourite takeout every Tuesday. When he worked the early shift, he’d always make you a coffee before he left, on the late shifts he’d bring home a bottle of your favourite. He did the dishes, and you did the laundry. You were a secure little domestic team.

The surrealness came when you realised just how much you enjoyed it. You welled up with pride whenever he complimented something you’d cooked him from scratch. Starting your morning in his presence calmed any nerves, and on stressful days, coming home to dinner and a film with Cas was your respite. 

You were confused by the bitterness you felt when he called you one night to say he would be home late, citing a date with his boss, Nora. You were truly sad, but relieved when he informed you he had misread the invitation. That he was actually there to babysit. That’s when it hit you. Somewhere along the way, in between all the household chores, and the late-night Hulu binging, you’d fallen for him. 

You’d always thought he was hot, ever since he’d introduced himself as ‘Castiel, an Angel of the Lord’ all those years ago. However, you no longer needed to accidentally catch him leaving the shower, or bending under a table to feel flushed. Ever since the figurative penny dropped, all it took was a smile, or the brush of your chests in a tight hall to make you blush. 

Thoughts of Castiel and your myriad of complex feelings now plagued you, particularly as you lay in bed at night, knowing he was only feet away from you, just on the other side of your paper-thin walls. Paper-thin walls that did nothing to protect you from the sudden and deafeningly loud sound of the TV at 2AM. 

Not bothering to throw on bottoms, you stumble to your bedroom door in just a camisole and panties. The sight of Cas sitting on the couch, clad in nothing but boxers, desperately fiddling with the remote in an attempt to turn down the volume greeted you upon entry to the living room. 

Upon noticing you, Cas drops the remote and hastily reaches for his discarded comforter to cover himself with. In turn you rotated your entire body, averting your gaze in favour of the wall, primarily to respect his privacy, secondarily to hide the blush creeping up your cheeks. 

“I’m so sorry!” You blurt.

“It’s okay.” He responds quietly. “I’m sorry for the noise. I couldn’t sleep, I didn’t mean to wake you.” 

“It’s okay.” You repeat back to him. “I was awake, I couldn’t sleep either. You just made me jump.” 

“You can look now.” He informs you. Hoping the dim light from the TV doesn’t reveal too much of the colour in your face, you spin back. He was now covered from the waist down, but you couldn’t help noticing his bare chest, particularly the definition between his pecs, and the sharpness of his collarbones.

“I guess I’ll leave you to it.” You say, trying to re-direct your eyes to any other part of the room. 

“Unless…” He gestures to the television. “Would you care to join me?” 

“Sure.” You answer hesitantly. You weren’t sleeping anyway, what was the worst that could happen?

Castiel smiles amiably at you before returning his attention to the remote. You linger in your spot as he begins flicking through the different apps. When he makes no effort to locate and put on trousers you slowly settle down next to him, careful to leave enough distance to prevent any accidental skin-on-skin contact. 

“So, what are we watching?” 

 ————-

You vaguely recall falling asleep around 40 minutes into a Capra film, but when and how you’d nestled yourself against your flatmate was a mystery. Despite your instinct to jerk away, you remain still when you feel his fingers brushing against your bare shoulder. Between the warmth of his skin on yours, and the soothing beat of his heart, you are soon lulled close to sleep once again. Until the sound of Cas’ low voice in your ear rouses you. “Are you awake?” 

When you nod, he continues, “Is this okay?”

You nod again, and quietly add, “This is wonderful.”

You can’t see his expression from your current position, but he exhales, and you think he sounds relieved. 

It could be the scarcity of sleep, a ‘mind after midnight’ mirage, but this is when it occurred to you that maybe, just maybe, he could be interested in you too. Why else would be lying beneath you, half-naked and seemingly completely at ease? Doubtful that you’d ever have this courage again you tilt your head up to look at him and ask; “Do you ever think about us?”

“I do.” He responds, he looks perplexed, which admittedly was his default expression.

“Do you ever think about us, as more than this?” When he doesn’t immediately answer, you resume. “You know, like romantically? Or even intimately?” 

“I frequently think of you amorously.” He speaks tentatively, each word spoken very deliberately. “When Metatron took my grace from me, I never imagined that this was how my life would go. Of course, I never thought that my grace would be taken, or that I would live among humans as one of them in the first place.”

He seems to take a moment to compile his thoughts, sucking his bottom lip in concentration. You remain silent. Hoping he can’t feel the rapid thrum of your heart.

“I thought at first that I was broken. The fall, losing my wings was bad enough, but now, without my angelic abilities, I can’t do anything. Well, nothing of merit, at least where the needs of humankind are concerned.”

“That’s not true.” You interject, you move to sit up, to be at eye level with him, but due to your already precarious position, the only way to do so is by shifting a leg over his lap, thus straddling him.

“I know that now.” He says as he grips your wrists and brings them to his shoulders, offering you extra support. “Without meaning to overstep, or make you uncomfortable, but living with- existing beside you has been a far more fulfilling experience than most of the things I have accomplished in the many billions of years I have existed.

I have very little practice in the ways of human sexuality, and even less so with courtship. However, I would be honoured, and extremely happy if you would allow me to explore such things, with you.”

“Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

“If you will have me, I am yours.” 

There's a tense moment of silence between you both in which neither of you dare to break eye contact before you surge to him. You instigate the kiss, but Cas is fast to take control, his arms pull your body to him, driving your lips to press hard against his. When he rocks his hips up, kneading his semi-hard cock against your clothed core, you gasp. Cas immediately slips his tongue between your lips. You can’t hold back the groan that escapes you. His mouth tastes like coffee and artificial grape. You savour the feel and aroma of his lips before pulling back momentarily. 

“Only if I can be yours too.” You finally respond before he’s on you again. You freely open up for him, allowing him to explore your mouth once more. His tongue eagerly swirls against yours, exploring every crevice. His hands drop to clutch your waist, holding you in place as he ruts against you from below. 

It was you who broke the kiss again, locking your eyes with him as you climb off his lap. 

“Let me take care of you.” You chime as you drop to your knees on the floor below him. Cas quickly follows, sitting up straight, and planting his legs on either side of you. The comforter banished to the other end of the sofa.  

“You… You look so beautiful like that. On your knees.” He smiles down at you and reaches out to cup your face, strong fingers gently brush along your jaw before his thumb extends up to your lips. You press a kiss to its pad before parting your lips and taking him in. His skin tastes clean, with a hint of salt, and something florally. 

“Let me suck your cock.” You state, voice muffled by the pressure on your tongue.

His cheeks are tinted pink. You’re unsure if it's from arousal or nerves but he stands to pull off his boxers and settles back down. You can’t help but lick your lips when his cock is revealed, it's long and already hard. 

You don’t waste any time, immediately situating your tongue on the underside of his shaft and running it from tip to hilt. You stop momentarily to plant a kiss on his balls, before running back up his length. When you look back up Cas is watching you intensely, brow furrowed, lids heavy, lips between his teeth. You smile before wrapping your mouth around his cock. Pausing only slightly when you feel Cas cup the back of your head. 

You inch yourself down his length slowly, getting a feel for him, his thickness, and how much you can take at once. When you feel his tip hit the back of your throat, you pull back, before bobbing back down. The sound of Castiel’s’ hitched breathing drives you until you’re relaxed enough to take him completely. His thickness stretches your throat, making your eyes water, his pubic hair tickles your nose, and the look of bliss on his face makes your pussy drip. 

After a few seconds, you come back up for air, but the relief in your lungs only lasts a second before you feel Cas’ fists tighten against your scalp. 

“You look even better with my cock in your mouth.” He grunts as he pushes you back down. “You feel so good.”

Unable to respond, you hum your affirmation, drool escaping the corners of your mouth. Cas moans his approval, eyes and head lolling back for a moment before he plants his other hand firmly on the back of your head, holding you in place as he shifts to the edge of the couch and begins bucking his hips into your mouth. 

You plant your hands around his calves to steady yourself, and keep them out of the way as he continues to use your mouth. His thrusts grow heavier, his moans raspier, as you fight your need for air. Your cunt growing hotter, wetter every second, while your throat closes, and your head grows dizzy from the lack of air.

When he finally lets you go, your lungs are burning. You lean back, unable to control the wild rise and fall of your chest as you pant for air. Your lips feel sore, swollen, but your pussy aches. 

“I’m sorry.” Cas reaches over to cradle your face, tentatively brushing the tears from your eyes. “Was that too much?” 

“No! No not at all.” You whisper between breaths. You reach out for his hand, and he takes it. His head tilts to one side as he looks down at you sceptically. You smile back as you guide him between your legs. You brush his fingers against your panties, encouraging him to feel the wetness soaking through the fabric.

“I did that? I made you this wet?” He asks. When you nod his mouth cracks into a smile.

Within seconds he drops to his knees before you, pulling you in for another hot, open-mouthed kiss. Your tongues meet in another fierce, uncontrolled kiss. You cry out into his mouth when you feel his fingers press firmly against your clit, rubbing you through the thin fabric of your underwear.

Without warning Cas clutches onto your panties and pulls until the elastic snaps. He releases the offending article and quickly returns to your wetness. He strokes your clit repeatedly, swallowing your moans, holding you to his chest to prevent you from involuntarily withering away.

You break your lips away from his just long enough to plead; “Fuck me Cas, please fuck me with your fingers.”

He doesn’t hesitate to do as asked, immediately delving two fingers into your pussy. Once situated inside, he massages them against your walls, feeling you out and making you sputter. You grip his shoulders for support, digging your nails into his skin as he starts to thrust in and out of you.

“Like this?” He questions, you’re not sure if he’s being coy, if he’s teasing. Or if he truly is curious. Either way, you’re too gone to really answer. You open your mouth but all that comes out are a series of strangled whimpers. The feel of his thumb returning to your clit, gently brushing just the right spot, pushes you to breaking point. 

“I’m- I – ahhh.” You cry, trying to warn him. When you jerk your head back there is resistance. Cas releases his hold on your back, to grips your head forward. You peek up at him through half-lidded eyes, Cas stares, his blue eyes bare down on you, unblinking. If you weren’t already cumming, that would have been enough. 

You lean into Castiel’s body as you come back down, limp, and incoherent. A low hum escapes you as Cas languidly removes his fingers from inside you and brings them to his lips. You watch lazily as he gives them a tentative sniff before placing them in his mouth. His face seems to melt, and he closes his eyes, visibly savouring the taste. 

When he’s done, he grins at you and ponders aloud; “I’m not sure which is better.”

Still unable to string two words together you watch him, waiting for him to continue.

“The way you look when you reach orgasm, or the way you taste.” 

Instantly your cheeks begin to burn, and heat pools between your legs again. Without a second thought you reach down, grabbing your cami by the hem and lifting it over your head, your entire body now exposed to Castiel. 

He’s on you again in an instant. His mouth latches to one of your nipples, rapidly but lightly his tongue darts over the sensitive nip. Both hands come up to cup each breast. His fingers pinch and roll at your other exposed nipple. When you feel his teeth grazing the sensitive skin you flinch, fisting your hands into his hair. 

“Cas, please!” You gasp.

“Please what?” He responds, speech distorted by his refusal to remove his mouth from your body. 

“Please take me to bed.” You whine, needlessly pulling at his hair to garner his attention. “Please Castiel, take me to bed-”

You’re interrupted by the jolt of your body being lifted. Cas continues his oral assault, kissing, sucking, nipping at your neck as he carries you back to your bed. He sits himself on the edge of your bed and positions you to straddle him once again. You pull his attention back from your neck, sinking your lips onto his as you guide him down, until he’s lying face up.

You lean back and he sucks in a breath as you wrap your hand around the base of his cock. You line him up at your entrance and he begins gradually rocking into you. You steadily sink down, the feel of his cock stretching you out making you shudder. Cas’s head rolls back, he bites his lip and grips your hips, barely fighting not to slam you down onto him.

When his cock is fully inside, you pull back up until only the tip remains inside before you drop back onto him.

With a loud moan, Cas engulfs your body with his own and flips you over. He holds you beneath him with the weight of his own body as he gives a few shallow, testing thrusts. Satisfied he begins building pace and force, until the sound of skin slapping against skin can be heard between ragged breaths and moans. You raise your lower body, trying to match his rhythm but his hands lock onto your hips and push them down, pinning you to the bed.

His lips are tight between his teeth, his brow furrowed, and his skin glows with a sheen of sweat. You can’t help but paw at his shoulders, bringing him down so you can plant kisses on his face and neck.

“Cas, fuck. Castiel that feels so good.” You praise.

In response, he catches your lips in a desperate kiss, all tongues and teeth and jumbled sounds that may once have been words. Your toes begin to curl, as your climax grows near. You lock your fingers in Castiel's hair, pulling his face away as you arch your back. Your eyes close tight as you chant his name.

“I love it when you moan my name.” He murmurs in your ear. He releases your hips, and grips your face, forcing it back up. Your eyes peek open as growls his next words. “Look at me, and don’t stop saying my name.”

At that, the tension in your cunt snaps. Your body jerks and your walls clench around him as you hit your climax. Castiel rides you through it, his strides slowing, but he continues fucking into you at a steady pace until he’s seemingly overcome by his own orgasm. His movements becoming laboured and erratic, he pants your name through gritted teeth as he spills his cum inside you.

You remain wrapped up in your position as you come down from your highs, the warmth of his breath tickles your neck, and your chests collide as you fight to catch your breath. Your mind races, trying to find the right thing to say next, not wanting to spoil your post-orgasm bliss. Eventually, you nudge his shoulder, and he moved away, allowing you to sit up. His cum seeps out of you as you do. Before you can make a move to clean it up Cas attains the tissues from your dresser and begins delicately wiping you down.

“Thank you.” You smile at him as he finishes and begins to clean himself up.

“I… ah.” He smiles back at you, still flushed from your activities. “I feel I should be the one thanking you.”

You laugh at the absurdity of his statement, especially after the performance he’d just given. Cas soon reciprocates your laughter. You stretch your arms out, inviting him back in for an embrace and he eagerly obliges, wrapping his arms around you and falling back against your mattress.

“Will you sleep in here, with me tonight?” Your eyes catch the clock on your bedside, and you note that it is almost sunrise. “Or, for the rest of the morning?”

He kisses your forehead and pulls you in close. “I would enjoy that very much.”

[sapphoherselz]

howdy!! two literal people have asked for some andreil rec so here they are!! my most favest fics EVER in the first 60 ao3 pages (I'll keep updating tho as I read!)

Not yours to bleed:

The Pros were never in the cards. Not for an ex-medicated alleged psychotic with a dysfunctional family and an Exy career he’d rather not have. But even if it wasn't his first choice, no matter what happens, it can’t possibly be worse than that one fucked up sophomore year when he stood toe to toe with the Yakuza-and won.

At least, that’s what Andrew thinks until a familiar face shows up.

Another Raven!Neil AU. Or, the one where the boys don’t meet until the Pros.

 

**Updates every other Wednesday, whatever hell may come.**

The Sun Still Rises:

Somewhere on the road, Mary Hatford gets pregnant with her second child. When she passes, she leaves behind not only Neil, but his toddler brother. Survival is difficult without also raising a kid. Worn out and desperate, Neil still somehow ends up at Palmetto, only this time, he brings his four-year-old brother with him.

TALE OF A MARTYR IN XII PARTS:

Neil closes his eyes and counts the things that he knows:

One: Death has a name.

Two: He has met Death before. Several times, in fact.

Three: Someone is trying to kill him. Permanently. But it's only kind of working.

Or, the one in which Andrew is the Grim Reaper, Neil is very, very good at dying, over and over and over again. They teach each other a few things over the centuries.

Hearthlines:

The Fae king and queens have gone away, closing the knowes behind them and abandoning their offspring to the mortal world. As the Fae have spread far and wide, their bloodlines thinning if not vanishing forever as they flee from mortal persecution... two Fae have found a way to reopen the knowes - Kayleigh Day and Tetsuji Moriyama. The Fae regroup once more, the balance of power shifted amongst them, and 'changelings' appear now and then in the mortal population.

Andrew Doe is one of those changelings, a young child suffering in the foster system, shunned by his peers for some reason and hearing voices in his head.

Alex - the latest name gifted to him by a charm - is on the run along with his mother from his father, using their talents as shadow walkers to slide between worlds and stay one step ahead of the powerful Fae. Except even that is not enough anymore. Except that's not Alex's only talent.

*******

An urban fantasy where I throw Fae, necromancy and magic at TFC characters, pretty much!

Scared to Live (But I'm Scared to Die):

Neil Josten goes to the Nest for Andrew, but he stays for a lot more.

~

"I'm sorry Coach," he muttered.

"For what kid?" Wymack shifted. "You've got to give me something to work with here."

Wymack watched the thin traces of sorrow as paper exchanged hands and he was looking down at a contract with the Edgar Allan Raven's.

"I signed them Coach, I'm sorry."

~

The one where Neil doesn't come back from Winter Break.

Amor Vincit Omnia:

“I said it already,” the man said, “Your cluster.”

“But what does that mean?” Neil asked.

“It means that you are no longer just you,” the man said tersely, “Congratulations.”

It didn’t feel like anything worth celebrating.

A Sense8 AU where the foxes all share one subconscious and kick a lot of ass

The Real Thing:

Andrew was more than willing to turn down the Ravens' offer to be their newest goalie, unwilling to play five more years of Exy - let alone for someone with a too-sharp smile and a manic gleam in their eyes.

That was, until he realized that a member of their Perfect Court was his soulmate. (That was, until Riko Moriyama realized that Nathaniel Wesninski, the Ravens' #3 in waiting, was Andrew's soulmate.)

Andrew always knew that Fate loved tormenting him, he didn't need a reminder yet again via a too-attractive soulmate who appeared to loathe him. Yet things aren't always what they seem, especially in the Nest.

mad girl says she's wolf-proof:

Keeping her grip light on Nina’s throat, Andrea drops her gaze to her plump lips. She smiles—coldly, slowly. Fangs on fangs. Salt tombstones. It is not a nice smile, none of Andrea’s smiles are, but Nina’s eyes are stuck in it regardless. “And I will answer, all the better to eat you with.”

 

(Andrea Dobson vs girlhood and lycanthropy.)

lessons in caretaking:

Neil was acting shifty, and Andrew knew why; that motherfucker was leaving. Despite the promise between them, Neil was prepping to run. Andrew wasn't upset about that, not at all. After all, if notorious Neil "No-Swing" Josten needed to leave after Andrew admitted his desires regarding his proximity to Neil's shorts, who was Andrew to stop him. But that doesn't explain why Neil was stealing socks, or why he wanted Andrew's clothes.

Whatever. That was probably unrelated.

Sauntering Vaguely Downwards:

They’ve known each other since the Beginning. Not the Beginning Beginning—they didn’t meet until after the War in Heaven, where they kept to their own sides, or until after the subsequent Fall. It wasn’t even until after the Exodus from Eden, but only by a couple minutes. They’ve witnessed the rise and fall of empires, sampled all the cuisines the world has to offer, and weathered several very silly fashion trends.

Andrew doesn’t think they’re friends, exactly, but it is natural to become accustomed to the presence of the only other being who has been around more or less consistently for six millennia. It wasn’t anything more meaningful than that.

A Good Omens AU where Andrew is a grumpy angel, Neil is a sharp-tongued serpent, and it takes them literally six thousand years to figure out they belong together.

[palmettoshenanigans]

also ALSO-

I know the old "AFTG is badly written" jokes but hold the FUCK on for one goddamn second

I have been writing for almost 20 years. I got my college degree in English and the only reason my specialization wasn't creative writing is because I had bad time management skills and missed my chance to do my final creative writing workshop. I'm autistic and Storycrafting and Wordsmithing are my special interests. I understand writing pretty well.

AFTG opened my fucking eyes to a blind spot of the utter craftsmanship of writing sticky characters that infect you with brain worms, and here it is:

The Conflict of Material and Form

AKA the Character Creation version of Nature versus Nurture

"This isn't who I truly am. This is who I've had to become, what I've had to fashion myself into to survive. The original me is buried in there somewhere, if only you knew how to look. If only you knew to look beyond the mask."

Easily exemplified with our fave lil guys-

Neil Abram Josten:

Material: smartass with a smart mouth, attitude problem, cares about people deeply, sharp tongue to cut a bitch with, kinda feral, a lil unhinged, oblivious idiot

Form: quiet and hidden, liar liar pants of fire, run rabbit run, docile and tame, hyper-vigilant and hyper-observant

Andrew Joseph Minyard:

Material: caring, protective, strong sense of justice, gentle even, cares deeply, give me sugar or give me death, yearning

Form: cold, apathetic, ruthless and unforgiving, allow me to introduce you to my knife, regret? don't know her, i want nothing nothing nothing

Why am I using 'material and form' instead of 'nature and nurture'? Because I am a subscriber to "Characters are not meant to be real people; they are mirages of real people meant to encapsulate a function or idea that serves the story". But use whatever terms click with your noggin.

This isn't about 'want vs need'. This isn't about 'lie believed and truth learned'. This is about Presentation and Basic Action - how would this character react here? Which part are they reacting from?

With Material vs. Form, one isn't the 'true' version and the other the 'false' version of the character. They are both true and real in their own right. The Secret Sauce is that the Material and the Form fight 1v1! And regardless of which part wins, there will be consequences and rewards; so which rewards do we want and which consequences are we willing to suffer? And this fight happens beat by beat, scene by scene, plot point by plot point.

At one point in TFC Neil laments his inability to shut his fucking mouth because his Form of 'don't stand out dipshit' and his Material of 'initiate smartass.exe' are disagreeing with how to respond to his circumstances! It's that fucking meme "My healed and unhealed versions of myself deciding who is going to handle this situation" but as Storycraft!

Now, I don't think this is a new idea by any means. But sometimes to make the essence of an idea truly stick, it must be presented in multiple different ways until one triggers a "Eureka! By Jove! Aha!", and this was the way that truly made this concept stick for me. And why did it stick? Because AFTG is a labor of deep love and passion for Characters and all their complexity and inner machinations, and that depth of devotion had to manifest as some good ass writing somehow my homies in christ.

I have a collection of my favorite Storycrafting Wisdoms and one of them is effectively:

"Put Compelling Characters into a Compelling Situation and see what happens."

And Nora does Compelling Characters beautifully

[joejhang]

my aftg hot takes

most of these are pretty lukewarm but i'm gonna get flamed for them anyway but whatever. spoilers ??? ahead ??? idk read at ur own risk

i don't think andreil ever say i love you to each other; i feel like the discourse about this is virtually endless ever since nora said it but honestly her explanation was so valid??? they're such a show not tell couple it just makes so much sense for them to show the "i love you" in their actions than ever saying the words out loud. esp bc neither of them have ever really heard those words and have them mean anything real or true or actually loving. personally i think their little percentages and the "i hate you"'s and kisses and keys mean more to them than an "i love you" ever could. i'm not a purist on this tho i do think i could visualise it happening maybe somewhere along the road i just think nora's explanation for this is very very in line with canon andreil.

i don't hate thea muldani; i've made a post abt this but basically my thoughts around her are literally just: she's a human being, and she's never gonna be perfect. i also find it very...interesting how the fandom likes to flame thea (an explicitly stated woman of colour) for being "problematic" and a "terrible person/character" when she doesn't act all that different from andrew, neil and kevin (white men) ??? idk it seems a little strange to me bc she seems pretty on par with them on whatever moral compass this batshit crazy fandom has decided to impose on these fictional and very much morally ambiguous characters. anyway go check out my post i go a lot deeper into thea's character and why she does a lot of things wrong but i don't rlly think she's deserving of the insane amounts of hate she gets in the fandom.

i don't think andreil ever get married; this MIGHT be me projecting bc the idea of marriage is just a very complicated and rough concept in my mind but also just i feel like there's something so beautiful about andreil never really putting a label on their relationship??? like they never define it by calling the other their "boyfriend" or "husband" they just are. they have nothing "concrete" binding them like a marriage certificate but they choose to stay with each other through everything. idk it's real to me but again i'm not a purist people can do whatever they want.

i've said it before but i'll keep saying it till enough people hear me: the aftg fandom mischaracterises literally the main fucking characters; i'm mostly talking about andrew and ESPECIALLY neil here bc neil is not a sweet, sunshiney, oblivious, blushy softboy and andrew is not a cold, unemotional, stoic, "conceal don't feel" stone. since i've already bitched on and on about neil's mischaracterisation let's just talk about andrew for a sec. i think andrew is actually a deeply emotional person and is fully aware of the feelings he experiences. does he vocalise or express them often? no but more often than not they show themselves anyway. him crashing out after neil was kidnapped, letting himself get walked like a dog by neil for three books straight, choking allison for slapping aaron, idk i could go on. but yeah you get it.

i don't actually think neil is that oblivious; before people come at me like "but nora said!" or whatever yeah, i know she said he's as dense as a brick when it comes to people flirting with him. considering how much of the ec the aftg fandom likes to disregard allow me to disregard this little bit of it, yeah? this isn't me tryna impose my own projections onto nora's characters, this is lit just me tryna explain how i understand neil josten (he's my bsf btw). he literally clocks his feelings for andrew in trk (after his deep convo™ with nicky) but he just files it away for later bc he doesn't consider attraction or romantic interest anything to be thinking about considering he's got the mafia and his serial killer dad on his tail. i also don't really blame him for not catching onto andrew's feelings earlier (tho doesn't he get pretty fucking close during that one convo they have in exites in trk???? someone correct me if i'm wrong but) bc dude andrew was out here sending fucking mixed ass signals like bro was saying "you are a pipe dream" and "i hate you" in the same fucking conversations like??? neil has always taken andrew at face value and he's not about to question him now. he's also never confused or uncertain about nicky or marissa and what their comments about him meant, he just genuinely does not gaf about them so he doesn't acknowledge them or pay them any attention in his narration. i truly truly think his dismissal of all the advances made upon him in aftg were borne out of indifference, not obliviousness.

have already said this in detail but i don't think andrew's actually a misogynist; the wording doesn't feel right. i'd probably describe andrew's distrust of women (esp. those in motherly/mother roles) as a similar ingrained wariness that neil has for older men. this is something borne out of trauma and shitty experiences that takes time and trust to unlearn. nora says a lot of things the fandom disregards and for me, this is one of those things i'm a little iffy about. misogyny actually isn't reflected in andrew's actions at all, i'd say. does he respect women? no. but he doesn't respect anyone unless they've actually earned it. and among the people he does respect and care for there are women (renee, bee). he doesn't treat women any differently and obv doesn't think they're any weaker than men are (considering renee wipes the floor w him their first sparring sesh). andrew's an equal opportunity hater and i don't think he actually has any sexist or even misogynistic tendencies. i think what is there is just a slightly biased worldview of disliking/mistrusting mother figures, given his bad experiences w tilda and cass (they've left him w more long-term emotional damage that's probably rlly difficult and complicated for him to work through esp considering cass did love??? him and he did want her enough to be willing to suffer dr*ke to be close to her; there's more to it but for the sake of word count i won't go into it) but honestly it doesn't actually show that much??? if people wanna say he hates women, sure, but for one, he doesn't hate a lot of things he's just very indifferent to them and two, he holds a pretty similar apathetic distaste for most people and things, so it's not like a very big distinction. i also think the whole "no girls" thing w aaron was very much a personal thing, and his mistrust of katelyn probably came from aaron's past (apparently negative) experiences w other girlfriends and friendships in general. and if i remember correctly the deal wasn't even "no girls" it was just "family only" which is why aaron didn't make friends w the rest of the foxes either. i digress but i don't think saying "andrew isn't a misogynist" is robbing him of any nuance as a character.

i like nicky and honestly feel similarly towards him as i do about thea; he isn't perfect and never will be and i think while the way he acts towards neil and others (see: matt, kevin) is pretty untoward and inappropriate, i also do see where he's coming from, esp after aaron's explanation of it. that it's a defence mechanism coming from someone who's experienced a lot of prejudice and harm because of his sexuality. obv i think everyone can agree his assault on neil was fucked up but i think nora was right in saying that nicky was high and drunk and not rlly in his right mind at the time, and he does apologise and i'm pretty sure she also said he and neil work it out privately anyway. he's a messy character and definitely not perfect queer rep but again, he's pretty realistic, and i think he's honestly a rlly well-written and complex character.

[juanarc-thethird]

Good day, Given your use of fan drawings and similar media for RWBY and Jaune, have you ever though of doing a small story based on this image? Sadly don`t know who the authors is, would add them if I did.

Same, I remember seeing this style of art somewhere but I don't remember the name. ------------

Before the disaster: JNPR is on a mission

Pyrrha: Nora, where did you say you got this information about our objective?

Nora: A girl named Neo gave them to me.

Pyrrha: Neo? Neapolitan? As Roman Torchwick left hand man?

Ren: Woman in this case.

Nora: The same one.

Pyrrha: And she gave it to you just because? She didn't ask for anything in return?

Nora: Nah, she asked to eat ice cream from Jaune.

Pyrrha: You meant, eating ice cream with Jaune, right?

Nora: Nop, she said she wanted to eat a Sunday on Jaune's muscles.

Pyrrha: SHE WHAT?!!

Ren: Oh boy.

------------ Back to the present

Jaune: *His hands are tied to the headboard of the bed*

Jaune: *Blushing* C-Can you hurry? It's really cold.

Neo: "Nope, I'll enjoy this until I'm satisfied🤤💕"

Pyrrha: NEO!!!

Jaune: Pyrrha?

Neo: "Oh boy, she's here 🙄"

Pyrrha: How dare you do this to my leader!

Jaune: I'm srry Pyrrha, but it was for the mision

Neo: "Is not a big deal😒"

Pyrrha: Without inviting me!

Jaune: Huh?

Neo: "Wut?😐"

Pyrrha: I brought 1 gallon of Neapolitan ice cream and chocolate syrup. Not extra spoons.

Jaune: No spoons?

Neo: "Oooh~ I see what you're planing😏"

Pyrrha: So... can I?

Neo: "Go ahead😉"

Pyrrha: Grand!

Pyrrha opens her gallon of ice cream and begins scooping it out.

Jaune: Pyrrha? Where are you going to put- Oh god!! It's cold! IT'S COLD!!!

[thinkingaboutbetterdays]

the power of love. ( max thunderman x reader)

gif belongs to me

Strange things were happening in Hiddenville and Phoebe was determined to figure out what caused it. It all started at breakfast one Saturday morning when Max spent a little longer on his hair - something she didn't think was possible. On the weekends he usually slept in but her twin's sleeping habits were the least of her concerns as he left the house just after nine am with a backpack that he had kept over his shoulder after he made himself toast instead of stealing it from someone else's plate.

When he returned in time for dinner, his mood only seemed to have improved. Everyone was stunned when he took plates from their mother, saying, "Let me help with that," and for a brief moment, Phoebe wondered if her twin was replaced with an alien.

A short while after dinner, as he did a few nights a week, Hank continued their training sessions and Phoebe noticed how much attention he was paying to their father, for once not making jokes, just standing with his arms crossed, appearing to be listening intently.

The next day Max stayed in his lair, only coming out for food which he took down to his bedroom. Phoebe began to speculate about where he went yesterday and why he hadn't come out of his room most of the day. When their mother called them for dinner, Max left his lair and Phoebe snuck inside, looking around at the dimly lit bedroom/lair for any clues as to what Max was doing - suspecting he was building a new device.

"There has to be something in here somewhere." She muttered.

"Talking to yourself again?" Dr. Colosso spoke up from his cage.

Ignoring the former supervillain, now rabbit, as she walked to one of the desks, noticing how tidy it was. She looked around the bedroom and realized it had been tidied - impressive considering she had never seen Max clean anything.

"He's definitely up to something." She sighed when her mother called her name and headed upstairs, joining the family at the dining table.

If Max felt her suspicious stare, he showed no signs, talking to Chloe who asked him where he went yesterday.

"The park?" Phoebe echoed in disbelief. "You went to the park?"

Max shrugged.

"You spent all day at the park?"

"Yeah, he just said that. Try to keep up." Billy told her.

When Max finished his dinner he stunned the table into silence as he complimented his mother's cooking and noticed the stares he received when he carried his plate to the sink. "What?"

"Is he possessed?" Nora whispered to her father who was equally perplexed.

"What? I've put a plate in the sink before."

Everyone shook their heads except Phoebe who was more certain that he was up to something. Max took the slide down to his bedroom and while her father was distracted by the television and Nora and Billy were upstairs, Chloe sitting in the kitchen with their mother as she washed the dishes, Phoebe snuck into the lair which was in darkness. She flicked on a light and quickly noticed her brother was nowhere to be found. She climbed onto the rock when she saw the window was open slightly, allowing him to come and go as he pleased.

"Max!" She grumbled, growing more certain that he was up to something.

On Monday morning she woke up early, preparing to confront her twin about what he was doing on their way to school, but he was already gone. Phoebe hadn't expected to see him at school, believing he was ditching for the day, but Max was standing with his friends, typing on his phone. The curve of his lips made her uneasy. He was up to no good. She could feel it.

The opportunity to confront him didn't come until later that night when they finished their training session with their father and she followed her twin into the kitchen, crossing her arms as he took a sip of water.

"What?"

"I will figure it out." She warned.

"Okay…figure out what exactly?" Max asked.

"Whatever you're up to. I can feel it, you're sneaking out of the house and I will find out where you go, Max."

Max chuckled, "Wow, you are really paranoid."

"Ah-ha! So you are up to something!" She pointed at him, raising an eyebrow.

"I don't know what you think I've done or what I'm doing but I am completely innocent." He said, holding his head higher. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have totally innocent things to do in my room."

He sipped his water as he walked down the stairs into his bedroom and Phoebe realized that it was the first time she could recall him ever calling his lair a bedroom - used to him arguing that it was a villain's lair where he was set on becoming a supervillain.

She opened the hatch quietly, hearing his voice carry up the slide as he spoke to someone.

"It's not that I don't want to see you - I do! My sister is getting suspicious and I'll lay low for a while until she forgets about it." He paused as the person on the other end of the phone spoke, answering when they were done. "Tomorrow? Sure!"

Phoebe frowned as she closed the hatch. "What are you planning, Max?" She whispered.

The next morning Phoebe did not want to risk Max sneaking off again and woke up early, racing after him when he left for school early and kept a safe distance, hiding behind trees or newspaper stands when he glanced over his shoulder.

He was definitely up to something, given how cautious he was.

Phoebe followed her twin to the high school which was almost deserted at this time aside from one or two teachers. She followed him inside and hid while Max looked around, and Phoebe hid behind a vending machine as his phone chimed.

A smile formed on his lips and he looked at the stairs, beginning to climb them two at a time when a girl appeared around the corner. Max's smile softened as he stood two steps below her, matching her height.

"Hey,"

"Sorry for all the smoke and mirrors." You placed a hand on his shoulder and Max shook his head.

"I understand. Really, I do. You have no idea."

You smiled softly as you wrapped your arms around his neck, burying your head in his shoulder as his arms embraced your waist, lifting you briefly. You placed a hand on his cheek as your feet touched the ground, and Phoebe was stunned when you kissed her brother.

Was this his plan? Some kind of love potion?

Your bracelet beeped and you sighed as you pulled away, sending Max an apologetic smile. "Sorry. Duty calls."

"I'll see you later?" He asked hopefully.

You nodded, "I think I'm getting the hang of using a cell phone." You stepped forward to kiss him passionately one last time before running up to the second floor, while Max sighed, hooking his thumbs in the straps of his backpack.

Phoebe stepped out as he turned and his eyes widened when he saw his sister, her expression telling him all he needed to know.

"What are you doing here?"

"I followed you, Max." She explained. "I knew you were up to something. Who is she? A daughter of a supervillain?"

Max shook his head, descending the staircase, "No, and I can't tell you. Just leave it alone, Phoebe. It's better that way."

He walked away and she shook her head as she turned to watch him go. The lights began to flicker, the ground trembling for a few seconds, and she missed the smirk on her twin's lips as he headed to his locker. Phoebe decided to chase after you and demand to know what you were doing with her brother. But all the doors were locked - except one.

She climbed the short staircase to the rooftop and her eyebrows furrowed when she saw no one was there. Deciding to use the extra time before class to check her essay for the fifth time, Phoebe headed to the library, writing in her notebook about the encounter in the hallway.

Max hadn't said your name so she simply documented you as 'the girl from the stairs'. What she couldn't figure out is, was Max tempting you to the dark side or were you pulling him further away from his superhero family and taking him one step closer to his dreams of becoming a supervillain?

That night she waited for Max to sneak out of his window to meet you but he never did. She wondered what happened to change their plans and if he told you that she knew.

The next day passed by uneventfully. Max didn't leave early for school and Phoebe began to question if the plans you had made were called off when she saw Max leaving his lair and raced after him. Tonight she would get to the bottom of it. She was sure of it.

Phoebe was confused as to where her twin was going until he entered the park and realized he had circled around several times in case she was following.

"It's going to take more than that, Max." She muttered as she kept a certain amount of distance between them.

Max approached a statue and you crept up behind him with a smile when his back was turned, and Phoebe was not surprised by your ability to fly, creating enough height to cover his eyes with your hands.

"Guess who?"

"Uh, Wonder Woman?"

You laughed as you removed your hands. "Very funny."

Max turned as you landed on the ground and you smiled when he placed a hand on your cheek, his eyebrows furrowing when he saw the healing bruise on your head.

"What happened?"

"He caught me by surprise. It won't happen again. Although he finally discovered which metal slows my advanced healing ability, it still heals faster than non-superheroes like you." You turned your head to kiss his palm before meeting his concerned gaze. You heard the sound of stones crunching and moved away, looking around alertly. "Someone is here."

Max looked around the park and knew if it was your archnemesis he would have attacked by now, and quickly deduced whose footsteps you heard.

"Phoebe." He grumbled.

You raised an eyebrow at your boyfriend, "Who is Phoebe?"

"My twin sister," Max called for her to reveal herself and you looked between the twins warily. "I told you not to follow me!"

"I had to stop you from joining them." Phoebe held her ground and you glanced at Max.

"What did you tell her?"

"Nothing!" He turned to his sister, "Phoebe, get out of here!"

Your back straightened when your archnemesis appeared behind Phoebe and you pushed her aside, taking the brunt of his heat blast. "Look out!"

You recovered quickly, performing several back handsprings and turning your body slightly, fists clenched as your civilian clothes changed into your superhero outfit.

"Max, take your sister and get her to safety."

Phoebe shook her head, "No, we can -" Max covered her mouth as he pulled her behind the statue as you faced off against the supervillain. "Okay, what is going on?"

Max revealed your superhero name and explained to a stunned Phoebe that you met in Metroburg when he had ditched school to spend the day there and used your shield to protect him from a supervillain's power. You assumed he was a non-superhero and Max was too stunned at the time to correct you, leading him to continue the charade that he had no powers throughout your relationship.

The twins felt the ground shake when you took off into the air and weakened the supervillain with your powers until he lassoed you, the electric shocks causing you to fall to the grass.

"We have to do something!" Phoebe exclaimed.

"I know! I know! Just stay here!"

Max stepped out from behind the statue with the knowledge you could end your relationship for what he was about to do. He believed you enjoyed dating a non-super, someone who could teach you how to use a cell phone or go to the movies with you, teaching you how to blend into a crowd. Max used his knowledge of Hiddenville to give you an escape, even if it was only for a few hours.

"Hey, what's up big guy?" You looked at your boyfriend as you flinched from the shockwaves pulsing through your body.

"Max, run!"

He sent your archnemeses back a few feet using a telekinetic blast and released the lasso around you with his telekinesis. You moved to stand beside him, his twin flanking his other side.

"You have powers?"

"I'm the son of Thunderman." He explained.

Your eyes widened at the revelation, but your attention was drawn to the supervillain getting to his feet.

"You ever fought a supervillain before?" You asked.

"We did help capture Dark Mayhem," Phoebe answered.

You glanced at the twins, your gaze lingering on Max, releasing a shaky breath as you nodded, accepting their help. "Fine."

"This is so awesome!" Max grinned. You swatted his arm and he cleared his throat. "Right, sorry."

You put up a forcefield around the three of you when your archnemeses blasted flames towards you. When he pulled back to try again Max and Phoebe froze his hands and you flew towards him, kicking his chest, knocking him to the ground. You felt a hand pull you back and rolled over Max's back, shielding him as he used his telekinesis to hit the supervillain with a dumpster.

You relaxed your stance when the supervillain was pinned to the ground with the weight of the dumpster and while Phoebe remarked about how easy that was, you put up your forcefield to block the fire spreading from his hands, melting the ice and propelling him into the air.

"Coward!" Phoebe called.

Max had heard enough about your archnemesis to know that he did not want his sister to anger the injured supervillain enough that he came back. He froze her with his freeze breath and you tapped your necklace, your civilian clothes returning - an invention Max had created to grant you less time to worry about a wardrobe change.

"So…" You began, "son of Thunderman…yeah, you kept that quiet." You crossed your arms and looked at Phoebe who was beginning to thaw herself out before meeting his guilty gaze. "Why did you lie, Max?"

"You wanted to forget you were a superhero, and I liked that you didn't know I am the son of Thunderman." He sighed, "I would've told you, you know…eventually. But I just wanted you to know me for me, not my family."

You shook your head, opening your mouth to speak when Phoebe broke free and glared at her twin. You glanced between the two siblings, taking a step back. "Thanks, for all the help tonight." You sent them a small smile.

"Wait -" Max stepped forward and sighed when the ground rumbled as you shot into the sky. Phoebe frowned when she saw him close his eyes in quiet resignation.

The next day he spent his time at school before hiding away in his lair until it was time for another training session with their father. When it was over, Max leaned against the kitchen counter, checking his cell phone, his mood worsening when he saw he had no new messages.

As she observed her brother head to his lair, sulking as he took the stairs, Phoebe discovered the catalyst leading to his strange behavior. Falling for another superhero - a highly respected one despite your young age. She understood why he was changing his habits, and paying more attention to their father during training. She knew she was to blame for it falling apart, although she knew you would have found out about Max's powers on your own eventually, and decided to fix it.

Max was listening to music as he worked on his latest invention when he saw you at his window. He was surprised to see you and hastily climbed onto the rock, opening the window to let you in.

"Hey," You greeted with a timid smile.

"Hey," His eyebrows furrowed as he took in your civilian clothes. "what are you doing here?"

You raised an eyebrow at him, "You sent me a message asking me to come here. You had something to show me?"

"What? I never sent any message -" Max took out his cell phone from his jeans and grumbled his twin's name a few moments later.

You smiled in amusement, looking around his bedroom, and approaching his workbench. "What are you working on?"

"Uh," He scratched the nape of his neck as he followed you, "civilians have this thing called a smartwatch, so I gathered a few spare parts and tried to outdo it."

"Tried?" You sent him a knowing smile and Max grinned.

"And succeeded."

You listened as he put the watch on his wrist and showed you the features. You smiled fondly, feeling the atmosphere shift as he awkwardly set the watch down. "I'm sorry for disappearing like that it -"

"No, I get it." He shrugged off but you grabbed his hand and stopped him from turning away.

"No, you don't." You took a deep breath as you wet your lips, moving to sit on the foot of his bed. "I thought you were just a civilian. I didn't want to bring you into my life because I was afraid of putting you in danger." You clasped your hands on your lap as he sat beside you. "But you held your own. You were really great out there, Max."

Max smiled softly, bashfully rubbing the back of his neck. "Thanks." He cleared his throat, "We made a good team."

You giggled, nodding in agreement. "We did." You looked at your hands and Max wet his lips anxiously.

"I'm sorry for making you believe that I was a non-super." He apologized. "I wanted you to get to know me, so that when I did tell you the truth you weren't won over by my parents."

You shook your head, "I'm over it." You noticed the way his shoulders slumped slightly and quickly added, "No, not you! The fact you have powers. I'll never get over you."

At this, Max perked up and your eyebrows furrowed when music began to play before he could speak and looked over your shoulder as Max addressed the animal in the cage.

"Dr. Colosso?" You stood up and approached the rabbit in the cage on his workbench.

"Yeah, he was turned into a rabbit," Max explained. "And kind of my best friend."

"Kind of?" Colosso shrieked.

You looked at Max with a smile and he hushed the former supervillain who ranted about their friendship. "You are full of surprises."

Max chuckled, raising his arms, "That's me. Surpriso boy - wait, scratch that. Forget I ever said it."

You covered your mouth as you failed to suppress your giggles. "No, I don't think I can."

Max smiled when you leaned against his workbench as you caught your breath. "I'll invent something, don't worry."

You smiled softly when he tentatively raised his hand and stepped forward as he placed a hand on your cheek. "I must confess a secret of my own." You began, earning a curious raise of his eyebrow. "The reason I was so interested in the non-super world is because I wanted to connect with you. You know, when I thought you weren't a superhero."

Max's features lit up, "Really?"

You nodded, biting the inside of his cheek. "Can we start over? Well," You paused as you stepped closer, placing your hands on his chest. "not right from the start."

His other hand rose to your cheek as he exhaled a relieved breath, nodding distractedly, his eyes flickering to your lips. "Yeah, I'd - we should -"

You closed the gap between you and Max wrapped his arms around you, bringing your body closer as he kissed you passionately. You cupped his jaw in your hands, smiling against his lips as you melted into the kiss, matching his intensity.

Phoebe slowly closed the hatch and smiled to herself as she took a seat on the cushion. "The power of love." She whispered as she headed upstairs.

[rachetmath]

Jaune Revenge

Winter: Ruby we found her.

Ruby: Cinder. Everyone it's time.

Yang: Ruby no-

Ruby: I have to stop her. I am the only one.

Jaune: What?

Ruby: It has to be me.

Jaune: Who the hell- who the hell decided that?!

Ruby: She is my problem.

Jaune: I know this- oh hell no she- Ruby!

Ruby: Farewell my friend. I pray that I return.

Jaune: Oh hell-

After a minute what seemed like hours of fighting.

Cinder: Yes finally.

Ruby: *barely catching her breath*

Cinder: After all this time… you finally die Ruby R-

*Boom*

Cinder: *screams in pain*

Ruby: *looks behind her* Jaune. 

Jaune: *throws the gun away and slaps Ruby across her face* The f*** is wrong with you?!

Ruby Ow.

Jaune: You really think I would let you steal my prey? My kill? After all the bull**** that b**** put me through. The f***!

Ruby: Jaune I-

Jaune: I had dreams. Dreams of when I have this b**** in my sights. As her life is now in the palm of my hands. Having her beg for forgiveness has I take what little breath she has from her now feeble hands. Oh God yes… 

Ruby: …. Um

Jaune: And have you learned nothing from your people? Penny? Pyrrha? Alyx?!

Ruby: Whoa Jaune don't be–

Jaune: Stop running off somewhere, prepared to die. We do not do 1 v 1. We jump people. It is the most effective means to win. You are not built for that kind of time. There is no shame in having a squad, especially for enemies.

Ruby: But-

Jaune: Like your uncle, he sucks. He has lost a one-on-one every time since Beacon. Winter, hit him. Tyrian poisoned him. Hazel could have ended his career.  Your uncle needed two other hunters to take Tyrian in. He even required Tyrian to fight Clover. Your uncle isn't about that action. 

Ruby: Well sheesh…

Jaune: Now you excuse me- *pulls out the sword* I will finish this.

Cinder: You weakling. You piece of crap. What are you going to do to me huh? Kill me. Don't make me laugh. You don't have the- *stab in her arm* Ah! *mouths is covered*

Jaune: Oh no Fall maiden, we are just getting started. 

Cinder: *scared*

Nora: Ruby, sorry we’re late but-

Cinder: *screams in agony* My legs! My legs!

RWBY: *shock*

Jaune: Nah-nah we ain't done yet. This is for Pyrrha.*beats Cinder down*

Cinder: *yells in pain* Help me! Help me! Ruby help me! Please!

NERO: *scared*

Jaune This one's for Penny! *Stab Cinder's chest*

Cinder:  *screams*

Jaune: *healing and stabbing Cinder repeatedly* No, you gonna feel this. Yeah. Yeah!!

NPRA: *Summer and Alyx are shocked while Pyrrha and Penny fist pump*

RHAW: *Glad they never met Jaune*

Adam: Oh it was good that I didn't try to fight him on the train.

Hazel: Even though I know I can beat him…. It scares me that he could have a chance of killing me himself. 

Ironwood: Oh so he finally learned. Thank God. 

Clover: Sir please-

Ironwood: We died because of these kids, Clover, I have a right to be like this.

Cinder: No. No. Not my eye. Not my last eye, please! *screams as her eye is pulled out*

Salem: *watching from a far* Oo she will die. Not my problem.

Jaune: *exiles* 

Cinder: *dead* 

Jaune: Finally. And Oscar.

Oscar: Um… yeah-yeah what is it?

Jaune: Are you Ozpin now?

Oscar: N-no. Nope. I'm still here.

Jaune: Your girl. Your problem. I am tired of being the third wheel. The seventh wheel really.

Weiss: I mean -

Jaune: Figure out what you want in life then we'll talk.

Emerald: Oh my God I have maiden powers. I was Cinder’s last thoughts. I-

Jaune: *readies his sword*

Emerald: Jaune-Jaune calm down. We are good. We are good. Best behavior.

Jaune: You damn right b****.

Emerald: Jesus what have you been through on that island?!

Jaune: Isolation is a b****!

Cinder: *in hell and curled up in a ball*

Rogue: How was your freedom as a slave?

Cinder: Shut up. And why are you here?

Hazel: Are you serious? He left you unsupervised, and in a family where you were put through extreme work conditions to survive. 

Adam: You were a slave and the only thing he did was train you. 

Roman: He didn't even get you out. He abandoned you. He is a monster.

[solarmorrigan]

space au neighbor au steddie

So I wasn't actually sure what a space AU is meant to entail, so I hope a little vaguely Star Trek-inspired AU is okay?? This was a challenging combination, but it was fun!

Fanfiction Trope Mashup: 22. Space AU + 11. Neighbor AU

cw: vague mentions of injury, mentions of background character death

-

Lieutenant Steven Harrington transfers from the U.S.S. Nora and onto the U.S.S. Forrest about six months into the Forrest’s mission. He works in security. He can usually be found stationed somewhere on the ship, but sometimes he’s called up to go planetside.

(He’s also too pretty for Eddie to believe he’s one hundred percent human, but that’s neither here nor there.)

Eddie knows all of this because Harrington gets the previously vacant room right next door to his.

It isn’t bad, really; sometimes the sound of someone shuffling around on the other side of a wall that had previously been silent is comforting. Much as Eddie loves the hum of the ship around him—you can’t really work in engineering and not be a little enamored of the sound of the engines purring—sometimes human noise is what he craves.

(Particularly out here in the void of space. Eddie loves his job, loves working in the guts of a starship, but he wishes sometimes it didn’t come against the backdrop of an endless dark nothingness.)

Eddie doesn’t have reason to see Harrington very often during the day, but they work the same shift rotation, and they catch each other coming back to their rooms now and then at the end of a shift. They mostly exchange nods or waves, brief pleasantries if one of them is in the mood, but that’s really it.

At least, that’s really it until a few weeks in, when Eddie gets back to his room and sees Harrington still standing outside his own, mashing the buttons on the keypad and swearing quietly.

“Everything alright?” Eddie asks as he draws up at his own door.

Harrington lets out a long sigh. “Uh, yeah, just–” He shakes his head. “Apparently if you get your code wrong too many times in a row, the keypad locks you out. And you can’t get into your quarters. Which is… great.”

“You forget your code?” Eddie can’t help but ask.

“No,” Harrington snaps, then softens a little, looking sheepish, even a little embarrassed. “No, I just– sometimes the numbers get a little jumbled.”

“Ah.”

“Yeah. Anyway, I’m gonna have to go find someone from maintenance to reset this and let me in, so…”

“Nah, don’t bother. You’ve got in-built tech support right here.” Eddie gestures for Harrington to move aside and crouches down in front of the keypad to reset it; doors and security locks aren’t technically his remit, but it’s not like they’re hard. It’s the work of moments to get the keypad to unlock, and Eddie shuffles back out of the way. “Go ahead and try it now.”

Harrington steps up to the keypad and slowly punches in the six-digit code that should get him into his quarters, and this time, instead of beeping angrily and flashing red, it chirps and gives him the green light. His door slides open and Harrington sighs.

“Thank you,” Harrington says, turning a smile so bright on Eddie that he momentarily forgets how to function. “You’re a lifesaver.”

“Nah, t’weren’t nothin’,” Eddie says for some insane reason, slipping into a ridiculous accent like he does when he’s running tabletop games in the rec room with a couple of other guys from engineering.

If Harrington thinks he’s being weird, he mercifully doesn’t mention it. Instead, he sticks a hand out towards Eddie, still smiling. “I’m Steve, by the way. I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced.”

“Eddie,” Eddie says, taking the hand to shake (Steve’s hands are big, and strong, and warm, and Eddie tries not to think about it).

“It’s nice to meet you, Eddie. And not even for the obvious reasons,” Steve says, nodding towards his door.

“Yeah, you too,” Eddie says.

He then realizes that he’s still shaking Steve’s hand. He lets go, but Steve is slow to draw back. They’re quiet for a moment, both unsure how to end the encounter, before Steve lets out a little huff of a laugh.

“Well… have a good night,” he says, backing away towards his door.

“Yeah, you too,” Eddie says again, wondering where the hell all his eloquence has gone to.

With one last dorky little wave at Eddie, Steve disappears inside his room, and Eddie does the same.

They talk more, after that. Whenever their schedules coincide, they spend an extra few minutes outside their doors, learning more about each other, bit by bit. Eddie talks about why he’d joined up with a starship even though he really hates space (he’d had to get out of his small-minded hometown), and Steve talks about how he’d ended up really enjoying his work even though he’d only joined to appease his dad (captain of another ship, one Steve prays he’ll never, ever be assigned to).

Their conversations edge past five minutes, past ten, past fifteen. Eddie talks about his uncle, who taught him at least half of everything he knows about fixing things, who had encouraged him to reach for the stars. Steve talks about his best friend in the galaxy, who works up in communications and speaks “about a million languages.” He mentions that they’d met as ensigns, both stationed on the U.S.S. Butterscotch, but he doesn’t say much more than that (and Eddie won’t make him; he knows the story already. The ship might have had a ridiculous name, but the fate that had befallen it had been anything but: it had been taken over by hostiles and eventually gone down in flames. The number of survivors had been abysmal, and fact that Steve is here at all is a small miracle).

Steve learns that Eddie loves music and roleplaying games. Eddie learns that Steve has a knack for avoiding medical staff after altercations planetside and for brushing off minor-to-moderate injuries.

He’s not as good at avoiding Eddie, however, who makes a point of dragging him down to medical one evening after spotting a still-bleeding gash on Steve’s arm.

“One of these days, you’re gonna come back with something you can’t walk off,” Eddie warns him, “and I’ll be there to say I told you so.”

“Well, as long as you’re going to be there, I guess it won’t be so bad,” Steve replies, and Eddie tries not to be swayed by the flirting.

When Eddie turns out to be right, though, he doesn’t even have the heart to say I-told-you-so, which he feels a bit cheated about later.

The evening starts out so promisingly: Steve and Eddie are loitering outside their doors, Steve gravitating further and further into Eddie’s space as they talk, and Eddie is just about to pluck up the nerve to invite Steve inside when Steve’s communicator goes off.

He frowns, pulling it from his pocket to check the message, and his demeanor immediately turns serious. “I have to go,” he says, and apprehension prickles at the base of Eddie’s skull.

“Everything alright?” Eddie asks.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine.” Steve offers Eddie a brief smile. “We can pick up where we left off as soon as this is taken care of.”

Eddie wants to ask just what “this” is, but he finds out soon enough. The promising evening turns into a hellish night with too little sleep and too many hits to the machinery for comfort, under attack from some unknown, hostile force. When things finally calm down and reports start rolling in, things aren’t as bad as they could be. No casualties, minor damage to the ship, and minimal injuries. It sounds reassuring, until Eddie finds himself standing next to Steve’s bed in the infirmary.

“I’m going to be fine. Stop looking at me like that,” Steve says, even though his eyes are closed and he can’t possibly know how Eddie is looking at him.

And the thing is, Eddie knows he’s right – Steve might sound an awful lot like he’s in pain right now, but the medical tech on the ship is top of the line, and the staff is equally good. Steve will be fine, but that doesn’t give Eddie any comfort right then, realizing how lost he would feel without his and Steve’s hallway conversations every day.

How lost he would feel without Steve.

It scares him– for a moment, it scares him enough that he wants to run from it, to put a halt to things before they get too serious, before this really hurts him. But even more than that, there’s a feeling greater than the fear: one of rightness when he’s with Steve, a feeling that’s worth the risk, that’s worth holding onto.

Eddie reaches out and takes Steve’s hand where it rests on the bed.

Steve cracks his eyes open to look at Eddie.

“You know…” he says slowly. “They said I should be fine on my own by tomorrow, good to go back to my own quarters, but– I’d feel a lot better if there was someone nearby. Just in case.”

“Like someone right next door?” Eddie asks, a tease of a smile beginning to grow on his face.

“Maybe a little closer than that,” Steve says, squeezing Eddie’s hand in his own.

“I think I can do that,” Eddie says, finding that he’s prepared to do a lot of things, if it means he can keep Steve close.

[l0vegl0wsinthedark]

Zoom In.

Muggle AU, professor of 18C literature and poetry Draco, celebrity Harry ✨️

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Violet was the first to log in - again. In the minutes before class began - in the "waiting room" - while she stared at her blank screen, it felt like the only real few moments she truly had to herself.

She spent all those moments, like so many others, thinking about Professor Malfoy.

To every single straight girl, and the singular gay guy, in class, Professor Malfoy was prime wank material. Violet hadn't known her classmates to be as desperate for a good word on their assignments from any other professor. To think homework would feature so high on the to-do lists of some of the biggest lunkheads she knew...there was definitely something about him, that Professor Malfoy.

She could see the appeal. The eerily pale eyes, hair, and skin made to appear warmer by the fluffy jumpers - all in elegant shades of scarlet, burgundy, emerald, wine, golden yellow - he wore over crisply ironed button-downs and tailored trousers; the way he used his hands when he talked, long fingers like a pianist's; the slim golden spectacles he was constantly misplacing on his own head, the rich precision with which he pronounced the olde names and subjects that he spoke of - it was very difficult not to admire Professor Malfoy.

All of that, but nobody really knew much about him outside of uni.

They'd switched to virtual classes a week ago; hurrah for the new pandemic. The idea that she didn't have to sit in class with her tittering classmates, a stray cough sounding now and again, made Violet automatically sit up straighter and smile, just as the little boxes on her screen began popping into life.

"Aaaayyyy!"

"Tell me we don't need to have our faces on display."

"So, yes, before anyone asks: this is a real lip ring. An actual piercing. Yeah, I'm not blowing you, Greg, sod off."

"Is Professor Malfoy on?"

"No, I don't see him here yet. Did he grade your essay?"

"Yo, can someone please tell me how to turn this camera off, I am smashed out my--"

"Click on the camera icon, Bryan--"

"It's not even noon, what d'you mean "smashed"?

"No, you've turned off your mic. No, we cannot hear you screaming."

"First icon on the bottom left," Violet said, rolling her eyes.

And then Professor Malfoy was in class.

There was a beat of silence before everyone called out greetings, a chaotic round of cheerful hello's that nobody could quite make sense of. Least of all Professor Malfoy.

He was peering into his screen, his slim nose scrunched.

"All right, so I can see me. Can you?"

Cacophonic confirmations.

"Okay, so nobody can see or hear me. Right."

More shrill reassurances. One loud beer-belch.

"Damn it all to hell, I knew this would happen, I told him that I'll need--"

"We can see you!" shrieked Preiti.

"We can hear you!" Nora bellowed.

But Professor Malfoy was already twisting around in his chair, scowling heavily, and screaming, "OY! COME IN HERE, YOU MISERABLE WANKER!"

Violet, along with her classmates, just stared in mystified silence. The professor never spoke like that. He ticked them off if they did.

A tall figure in a too big hoodie appeared suddenly, hissing back at Professor Malfoy. There was a golden lion printed on the maroon jacket. The hood was drawn in close, and Violet could just barely make out the light from the computer screen glinting off a pair of round glasses, on which a shaggy fringe of dark hair fell.

"You need to turn the volume up. Git," said the stranger. "Your camera's already on."

"I hate technology," Professor Malfoy seethed.

"You hate so much else. I'm getting fish and chips." The man was already walking off.

"I want mushy peas too, with mine."

"What kind of sick bastard." The room door was shut with a thud.

"Sorry about all that. We are now officially in session," Professor Malfoy said, smiling and restoring his glasses upon his nose. "Do you all have--?"

There was a muffled shout from somewhere behind the professor. Pinching the bridge of his nose, Professor Malfoy called back, "No. No, I don't want a curry dipping sauce."

There was more muffled yelling.

"Harry, get out right now!" shrieked Professor Malfoy, and Violet, along with the others, just ogled.

Malfoy sighed. "Sorry 'bout that. Just my idiot husband."

"You're married?!" Violet had asked before she could stop herself.

Professor Malfoy sighed, flipping open a thick, spiral bound folder. "Yes. You've heard of Harry Potter, I'm sure. He's the poor idiot I married."

[empressdede]

Disrespectful

Chapter Two

After that interaction, London tried her best to create some distance between her and Roman. She would avoid his calls, texts messages and if she did finally get back to him, she would decline any outing he would invite her to.

She didn’t trust herself around him. She knew the longer she kept herself around him, the more she would want to jump his bones. The little moment between them made her feel like a horny teenager all over again. She had no business at her big ass age of 34, dry humping another man against the wall like she was some 16 year old virgin. And even though that’s all that they did; she couldn’t shake the memory away.

The way he held her up against the wall with ease, the way he grunted and groaned softly in her ear, and especially the way he demanded that she cum for him. Every time the thought entered her mind, It made her body shiver with want.

And that’s where her problem lied. She knows that she wants Roman; no matter how many times she tries to push it to the back of her head.

“You can’t keep avoiding him, London. Be a grown up and tell that man you need your space.” London’s sister, Nora, advised.

“I don’t have to do anything but be black and die when the time comes Nora. If I don’t want to talk to Roman right now, then I’m not. What we did at that party - his wife’s party no less - was a mistake. We’re both happly married and it needs to stay like that.”

“London, you’ve been with James since forever. Don’t you think this is your body telling you to venture out and try new things?”

“James is a good man Nora. I’m not going to ruin my relationship with my husband just because I’m feeling like I want a quick fix somewhere else.”

Nora rolled her eyes. “Girl, if James was beating the pussy up like he supposed to be doing, you wouldn’t have ran off with Roman in the first place. Then you ran off to go dry hump that man, bitch you ain’t never heard of no quickie?”

“Nora-“

“Bitch I’m being serious. If you was gonna step out anyway, you might as well have went out with a bang. Vibrator to the clit while he hitting it from the back & that 20 minutes could’ve been a whole fuckin round.”

Images immediately flashed through her mind as she thought about it. Her dress bunched up at her waist as he thrusted inside of her at a quick pace. Bodies close together so he could keep the vibrator to her clit and she could practically hear his voice in her ear. “I barely even started and look at you about to cum for me.”

London let out a sad sigh. Her sister’s didn’t help her with trying to push Roman to the back of her mind. If anything, Nora kept trying to push her straight into Roman’s arms.

“If I see him, I’m going to fuck him.” She admitted and Nora shrugged.

“So do that. James will always be here and who knows; maybe this is just a phase and you need him out of your system. Whatever the case may be, I say go for it.”

“You’re not even trying to give me good advice Nora. You keep telling me to cheat on my husband.”

“You already cheated girl and I wasn’t there to tell you that. You cheated emotionally and physically, you might as well just go all the way.”

Her sister’s words echoed in her head and she thought about it for a second, what it would really feel like to go all the way with Roman. She just knew he would snatch her breath away. She could almost feel him, a picturesque expression on his face as he took her hair into his hands pulling it towards him to stop her from hiding her moans. Damn…. She really did see it and even though she yearned to fall into temptation, London decides that she was going to stand on business.

She had a husband for everything she thinks she wants Roman for. She also decided that since she was going to be the woman she promised to be as a wife, she was going to throw herself into her work. What better way to distract herself from temptation than to work?

But Roman though? He was getting tired of waiting on London. He considered himself a realist - if he was going to be cheating on his wife, he was going to fulfill all the fantasies he had about London. They’ve tried to deny their sexual attraction towards each other for almost two years now; if she didn’t want him the same way he wants her then what happened two weeks ago wouldn’t have transpired. So after being ignored for two weeks, Roman decides he’s had enough. If London didn’t want to see him, so be it. Now he was going to go see her…. and with how distant she’s been he knew exactly where to find her.

"Mrs. Murphey, we have a Mr. Heyman downstairs waiting for you. He says it’s an emergency." Mariah states as she walks into London’s office. London lets out a tired sigh; she knew she didn’t have long before he started sending his minions to do his dirty work.

"Tell him I’m busy." London responds to her without even lifting her head to acknowledge her assistant. She didn’t really have time to entertain that bullshit today.

"Don’t seem that busy to me." She heard from where her assistant stood and her head snapped up to see Roman standing behind Mariah. And poor Mariah, she really tried her best, bless her heart but she knew when it came to Roman himself, he was going to finesse his way up here one way or another.

"Um sir you can’t be he-" Mariah tried to speak but Roman cut her off, keeping his dark brown orbs locked on London.

"You ready to talk to me like an adult?" He questioned. Mariah looked between the two of them, obviously sensing the tension but if her boss said she was busy, then she needed to get rid of this Mr. Heyman guy.

"Sir, you can’t be here. I’m going to have to ask you to leave or else I’m going to have security escort you out the building." Mariah warned. Roman stared at the younger woman in front of him with a blank face for a couple of seconds before laughing in her face.

"Okay lady, if you could close the door behind you, that would be great." He instructed, walking right past her to stand in front of London’s desk.

London finally snapped out of it when she got her over her feeling of shock from seeing him. "You don’t get to walk in here and tell my employees what to do. In this building, there’s only one person who runs it and that’s me." She enforced, getting up from her seat to glare at him. "Just like I can’t walk in yours and start telling Paul what to do."

"London-" Roman tried to speak again but was cut off by London’s assistant again.

"Um… Sir, you still need to leave."

"You can close the door behind you Mariah, you can leave. Let everyone know that I’m in a meeting and will be available afterwards. Come find me in 30 minutes." London instructed

"An hour." Roman replies, and this time he raises an eyebrow, challenging her to see if he wouldn’t keep her for the hour.

The two stared at each other for a while in silence, both of them challenging the other. London knew herself, an hour alone with Roman and she would be stepping out of her marriage. She also didn’t want him to think he had any power over her with his dumbass suggestion of having an hour of her time instead of 30. And as much as she didn’t want to admit it, the longer they glared at each other, waiting for the other to succumb in defeat, her sister’s words were ringing in her head.

"Maybe this is just a phase and you need him out of your system."

London finally rolled her eyes in defeat, turning to look at Mariah; "An hour. And not a second less."

When Mariah left, Roman let his eyes roam around her office. "You’ve been cooped up in here, I bet."

"What are you doing here Roman?" London asked getting straight to the point.

"You haven’t been texting me back for a while. So if you don’t want to talk over the phone, you definitely want to talk in person." Roman turned his head back to face London. "I can’t get you out of my head London, I keep hearing you cry out for me and when I try to call you to … talk… you don’t even pick up."

"Because you’re married Roman. To Tiara, not me. What we did a couple of weeks ago was a mistake. It shouldn’t have happened."

"If that were the case, you wouldn’t have worn the panties I bought for you."

The room got silent, energy in the room changing as they stared each other down. London really didn’t want to fall into this trap. That’s what Roman was, coming in here with his tight collared shirt and slacks just to tempt her. A walking fucking trap.

“You could’ve just walked in wearing anything; But you didn’t.” Roman started, walking around the desk in slow calculated steps. Like a predator stalking its prey.

London watched him, and she couldn’t move even if she wanted to; it seemed as if her feet were glued to floor the closer Roman got to her. “You wore my dress and you put on those pretty panties just for me. It wasn’t a mistake… you wanted to cum for me that night; tell me I’m lying.”

With Roman standing right in front of her, she couldn’t really think. His scent was clouding her senses, she should be moving away from him, fighting her temptation. But he was telling the truth, she wanted him that night. Still wants him, she just doesn’t know how to go about it.

“Roman.” She whispered out but Roman didn’t want to listen to anything she had to say unless it was her crying out for him again.

“Tell me.” He demanded quietly, his hands moving to hold onto her waist to pull her into him. A gasp slipped through her lips, her eyes closing when she felt his nose trailing up her neck.

He planted a kiss under her ear before whispering in her ear, “Tell me you wanna cum for me London and I can make that happen for you.” He rasped out.

And she could practically hear Nora now.

Bitch stop fighting and fuck him already!

It was obvious Roman wanted her just as bad as she wanted him, and London was a weak woman.

“Make it happen then.” She replied almost challengingly and it caused Roman to smirk against her skin because he came on a mission.

________________

"Fuucckkk" She loudly moaned when he pushed himself back into her. Legs on his shoulders with his hands holding onto to the back of her thighs. The immense feeling made her forget she was still in her office, where if anyone got close enough, they could hear her. But Roman didn’t give a single fuck. And when he leaned forward, pressing his body closer to hers, which pushed her legs closer to her chest making it easier to get deeper she couldn’t help but get lost in the pleasure.

Loud moans were flying out of her mouth, and Roman’s eyes stared down into her with a dark look in them. She knew exactly what he was doing, that look told her everything she needed to know. He was trying to find her spot, with no other intensions other than abusing it until she was cumming in waves for him.

"You done runnin’ from me?" He asked tauntingly, and she knew he wasn’t talking about running from him during the activity they were currently partaking in. He wanted her to give into him every single time they had the chance to be like this.

He slid his hands down her thighs and pushed them down as close to her chest as they could get, looking down between them to watch his dick slide in and out of her enjoying the small white ring of cream she left coated on him. He slowed down his pace purposefully to sew how loud she would get whenever he hit somewhere new. London couldn’t remember the last time she felt like this.

She tried to bite onto her lower lip to keep from screaming every time he went in deeper. Muffled moans came from her, nails denting his skin as she latched onto his back. Roman looked back up to watch her, eyes squinting as he studied her expressions and slightly moved to the left to hit a new area. He felt her clench around him and watched her eyes water from that specific spot. Found it

"Ouuu shit." She cried out.

"Right there?" He questioned as if he didn’t already know.

"Yesss, right there." Roman started moving against it, poking at her spot faster and faster as he let one of her thighs go and slid his hands up her stomach and breasts until he reached her neck. She let another loud moan as he loosely squeezed her neck.

"You never answered my question, you done runnin’ from me?"

London wrapped her arm around the leg he let go so she wouldn’t be so sore, she was so lost in the pleasure she almost didn’t hear him. "Huh?" He questioned, as he kept poking at her spot even harder now staring right into her eyes. She kept eye contact, responding by moaning louder and nodding her head.

"I can’t hear you, you done runnin’ from me London? Huh? When I ask you to come see me, you gon come see me right?" He asked, squeezing her neck a little tighter as he thrusted even faster.

He could’ve asked her for the world in the same moment and she would’ve agreed to give it to him. That’s how good he was making her feel.

Tears spilled from her eyes as she felt her stomach tightened and she clenched down on him. "Yessss, I’m done runnin’ Roman Please."

"Please what? Tell me."

"I-" She was cut off by her own loud moan, feeling her eyes roll to the back of her head. Roman continued to relentlessly pound into her, pushing to make her cum for the fourth and final time.

"C’mon baby, beg for that shit." He teased, enjoying the mess he was leaving her in. This was what he wanted to do to her the first time and he was glad he was able to redeem himself. The only thing that could be heard were their heavy breathing, her constant moaning and their skin clapping against each other’s.

"Please. D-don’t stop please" She stuttered out as she felt her legs start to shake; she was on the verge of cumming again - this time she knew it was going to me much more intense then the last one.

"You gon cum for me?" And he really didn’t need to ask, she placed her hand on his stomach to try to get him to slow down. Roman let go of her neck and quickly used his thumb to rub on her clit as he hit her spot over and over again. Her hand slipped from his stomach and she tapped on the desk, she couldn’t hold it anymore.

At the sight of her literally tapping out, he smirked and it did nothing but boost his ego. "Go head baby, cum for me." He permitted and with a silent scream she let her body arch off her desk and came all over him. He let out a groan at how tight she clenched around him and quickly pulled out of her and stroked himself with a few pumps and emptied himself on top of her; staking his claim.

If cheating on his wife felt like this - he didn’t give a damn about the consequences.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s been a minute huh? Here’s the second part - and I promise you guy’s wont have to wait that long for the next part😭😭

Comment if you want to be added to the next part and please show me some love🥺🫶🏾

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