#none of this is cohesive and will make sense to anyone who doesn’t know what my new job is

[scottspack]

i need a real diary but the online public one will have to do. im feeling so many things lately and have had such a crazy year of intense sudden growth and change and im trying to keep my head above water while also trying to appreciate and enjoy the new challenges as they come but also trying to synthesize and learn lessons not just go from one fire to the next without learning anything from the one I just put out. I want to be an intentional leader who leads in a pre meditative and considerate way and not in whatever instinctive and reactionary way first springs to mind when im in a situation. I want to make good decisions, not just acceptable ones, I want to build good habits, not just easy ones, I want to act, not just react. I’ve done a lot of maturing, but not enough. I’ve made a lot of progress, but there’s still so much room to grow. I’m proud of the decisions I’ve made, but I know I’ll look back on some of them in the future and see all of the ways I could’ve done better. I’m proud of myself and impatient for the future version of me that’s better at all of this.

[dantekidd]

Words to the Wise - Dante Kidd

TW: Mention of drug abuse

May 17, 2023

Dear Mama,

I have written and rewritten this letter over six times now. Unable to form my thought into cohesive sentences, but perhaps that’s the whole point of this, no? So I’ll try this one last time, and I’ll try to be as honest as I can be. I miss you so much. I don’t feel like I’ve been able to properly say my goodbyes to you after three years because it doesn’t make sense to me. You’re gone, and yet you’re still here. Everywhere I look, and everywhere I go. So much has happened in the last couple weeks. My entire world and life has changed in ways you would not believe. I sound so dramatic as I write, but I cannot handle my own emotions. I feel too many. There’s hurt, loneliness, sadness, anger and hope? Makes no sense does it?

HURT. I hurt for the disloyalty. It didn’t matter how bad someone could hurt my feelings, grams, I always stayed true to myself. I never lied to anyone that I cared about. Never overstepped my boundaries where I shouldn’t have. But I have been hurt in ways unimaginable to me. Someone I called a friend. Someone I called the love of my life. I don’t know how else to address that. Then there’s S. I know what she did had nothing to do with me, and that I should learn to hear and not judge but it’s difficult to do when my heart is so heavy. I understand why she kept her addiction from me, but I can’t comprehend how it happened to begin with. Not like she’d truly tell me everything.

LONELINESS. I miss you so much. When you left this world it felt like you took a part of me with you. No one knows me like you and papa. You saved my life mama. I don’t know where I would be right now had it not been for you and papa. Perhaps dead? An addict getting high under some bridge as I mourn the sad and depressing life that the world punished a six year old me with? Despite all the love and care you guys gave me I cannot escape my thoughts of that night. Of being alone, hungry, and cold. I have worked so hard to not ever feel that way again. I don’t think I ever told you the reason why I wanted to be an artist. This is why. Despite my love for music I knew that if I made it big I would prevent all that pain and emotions from coming back, but it didn’t work.

SADNESS. I am broken. My heart is broken in so many pieces that not even a piece of tape could put me back together. I wished too bad and too hard, and I am paying for it now. Was it wishful thinking on my part, Mama? After so many years of loving her, I couldn’t see another way out. I craved for her. Stopped everything I worked on so hard, just to finally be with her. None of it mattered to me. I just wanted her. . . For the past three years I’ve changed so much about me to try and mold myself into a man you could be proud of. Someone who was ready to finally stop running and . . . settle. And for what? It was nothing more than another waste of time. . . but I didn’t just lose her, mama. I also lost a good friend. . .

ANGER. . . This one is hard. I’m angry at Bella. Angry at Zekai. Angry at Sawyer. Just angry. So fucking angry. . . but also at myself. Why am I angry? My first and only love hid one of the biggest news of my life from me because she didn’t want to ‘ruin my life’ or some shit like that. Zekai. . . he was a friend. . . he was a good friend but I don’t know if I could look past what he did mama. The betrayal is too much for me. . . Sawyer. . . that one’s so much harder. I love her with a passion but her actions caused so much rage in me. It’s selfish to even say as she is going through her own pain and torment, but I’m so angry with her. Of all things to turn to why the drugs? Why not pick up a damn phone and call? 

GUILT. That one kind of sneaked in last minute. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . help me, mama. I don’t want to feel. . . It’s so hard to feel anything right now without thinking myself selfish. I think that I’m just too understanding. I’ve hit rock bottom, and come back up unharmed. . . not many can say that. Or have the support that I did. So feeling anything other than gratitude feels wrong to me. I don’t want to feel anymore. But it’s so fucking hard. 

HOPE. Despite everything messing with my current mentality I can see the light. I have a purpose in life other than music now. I have a child to care for, and to love. I have someone to give my all to like you did with me. Kaia is that light at the end of the tunnel. When everything around blinds me, she gives me clarity. It’s odd I’ve only known her a couple weeks, but there’s no words to explain this feeling. It’s so fresh and so pure. I can’t imagine a world without her anymore. She makes my heartbreak worth it. 

This would have been the part where you tell me what to do. . . but I guess you did everything you were able to with me. Now it’s time for me to figure out the rest. I think I know where to start. 

Location: Nightrest Cemetery Date: Sunday May 21st, 2023 Time: Approximately 6pm.

After sealing and delivering his letter to his grandma’s grave, Dante sat in his car contemplating life. For the past three years since he moved back to Nightrest he had been working on a project of his own. A home. Their dream home. When he was younger he remembered walking around with their hands interlocked as they fixated on their lives together. Their wants, their needs, and what their future might look like. Almost each afternoon after school the two would walk by this ranch style home that looked like it belonged in movies. He remembered how much she had loved it. The changes that she said she’d do when they moved in, and how happy the two were at the thought. 

Dante glanced down at the deed in his hands. Kaia Amora Reyes it read. . . 

[fancoloredglasses]

[RERUN] 7 Little Superheroes (a good ol’ fashioned...kidnapping mystery?)

[All images are owned by Marvel Disney. Please don’t sue me]

This is a review that suffers from some serious “wall of text” issues, in that there’s not a SINGLE image or video clip from the episode save the title screen! Well, we’re about to fix that! If you wish to slog through what is essentially a book report, you can do so here.

I’m sure most of you have heard/seen a variant of the “Ten Little Indians” trope in which someone invites a group to a secluded area with no chance of escape, then composes a cryptic poem about the means in which every one of them will die, one by one. In fact, Rooster Teeth did one of these in which they “killed off”  most of their executives.

Anyway, the writers of Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends thought this would be a great story to adapt. Just three problems...

1. The “Spider Friends” were just three. No worries, we’ll just bring in 7 guest heroes!

2. The show is only half an hour long (minus commercials and credits, so more like 20 minutes) No problem, we’ll cut the cast to 7 total.

3. That damn issue with violence on kids’ TV, plus do we really wanna kill off heroes like Captain America? Ummmm...right...they’ll just be...captured?

The villain of the episode is the Chameleon. I’d never heard of him before or since viewing the episode, but a quick Wikipedia search says he is the half-brother to Kraven the Hunter and a master of disguise (given his name, that makes sense) His voice seemed familiar, so a quick IMDb search revealed the actor also voiced Thorin Oakenshield, King Under the Mountain, from the Rankin-Bass Animation production of The Hobbit (a much better version than Peter Jackson’s production as it was more cohesive while being less than 20% as long, but I digress...)

If you would like to watch the episode, Disney+ has your hookup.

The episode begins with the Chameleon spouting the first lines of the poem...

7 Little Superheroes vanish one by one...7 Little Superheroes, soon there will be none!

We switch to Spider-Man swinging through New York, when he encounters a letter addressed to him along his patrol route (is he that predictable? Why hasn’t anyone set a booby trap on one of his regular perches?) inviting him to Wolf Island Mansion for some sort of gathering (not in the least suspicious...especially since Iceman and Firestar have similar invites...seriously, booby traps!)

Peter informs Aunt May that the three of them are going to a house party. Aunt May decides to invite their dog Ms. Lion along as well. Peter objects, but do you really think he could say no to Aunt May?

When the heroes reach Wolf Island, Iceman’s ice slide accidentally covers the lake that Prince Namor of Atlantis, the Sub-Mariner (hero #4) was swimming in. Iceman apologizes, but Namor insults them and flies off (yes, the undersea prince can fly. Don’t ask me, I just report this stuff!)

Upon entering the mansion, the group encounters the Sorcerer Supreme, Doctor Strange (hero #5), Captain America (#6), and Shanna the Jungle Queen (who? I mean #7)

[NOTE: the comic version is Shanna the She-Devil, but the writers understandably changed her name for the episode...I mean, no sense pissing off the parents! Either way, I’ve never heard of her...]

The Chameleon makes his presence (and intentions) known. This pisses off Namor (what doesn’t?) and he decides to leave...

...only to run into a force field (bet that pissed him off too) which covers the mansion, trapping everyone on the grounds! Then we get our first clue as to who’s on the chopping block...

7 Little Superheroes in quite a fix...One will meet fire, and then there will be six!

The group deduces that their “host” is the Chameleon, and that he very well could be disguising himself as any of them! (I thought he just disguised himself. Can he mimic powers too?)

Namor (no doubt in the most pissed off way possible) decides it’s best to work alone as he can’t trust appearances. (know what Namor is an anagram for? Mor...an? hmmm, doesn’t quite work, but you get my point)

(Thanks to Imperius Wrecked)

You’d think he’d be able to smell the difference between water and alcohol...)

Namor attempts to fly over the pool to the exit...

...but the Chameleon ignites the alcohol. The heat further weakens Namor and he falls into the fiery pool!

Meanwhile, Spider-Man is searching on the roof of the mansion, but falls into a trap panel (on the outside of the building? The Chameleon must have a hell of an issue with squirrels and raccoons getting in...), allowing the Chameleon to assume the web-head’s identity.

Let’s check in with Iceman and Captain America out on the grounds, shall we?

6 Little Superheroes trying to stay alive...One will step into quicksand, and then there will be five!

Seems a bit specific, don’t ya think? I mean, all you have to do is stay off the ground, right?

Iceman falls prey to a snare trap that suspends him about 10 feet off the ground. Cap rushes to his aid...

...only to catch a tripwire of his own, sending flying barbs his way. They’re easily blocked by his shield, but there are a lot of ‘em. “Spider-Man” arrives on the scene, suggesting Cap dive into a nearby pond until the barbs stop flying. (three guesses what the “pond” actually is...)

Captain Gullible dives in, and is pulled down by the quicksand. Iceman freezes the rope to free himself (why didn’t he do that before?) and is about to freeze the pond to save Cap, but “Spider-Man” offers to use his webbing to pull him out instead, only the webbing doesn’t stick to Cap and he sinks below the surface...

...as “Spider-Man” swings away, chuckling menacingly as Ms. Lion snarls at him.

Firestar and Doctor Strange arrive, and Firestar deduces that it must have been the Chameleon. The three follow Ms. Lion back to the mansion...

...where we see Spider-Man finally freeing himself from the trap panel by climbing down the flue (seriously, how does the Chameleon not have a problem with woodland animals invading his home?) just in time for Iceman to hit him hard with a blast of frozen mistaken identity.

The group quickly realizes their error when Ms. Lion shows concern for Spidey.

Let’s check in on Shanna the She-Devil Jungle Queen. She has climbed a nearby spire to get a view of the surroundings. I’m sure the view is impressive, but instead of getting your breath taken away by it...

...shouldn’t you be watching the Chameleon setting off the explosions in the very spire you’re standing on? (he does get around, doesn’t he?) Shanna falls into a pit (what? no poem?), but not before she sends a telepathic distress call (wait, she can do that? I honestly don’t know, as I’ve never heard of her) to Doctor Strange. The Spider Friends and Strange rush to her aid.

Unfortunately, by the time they arrive, the Chameleon has changed into Shanna. (This is beyond being a quick-change artist. This is shape-shifting!)

“Shanna” then jumps down and hangs off of a nearly ledge (you’d think someone with Shanna’s agility could get herself out of that predicament) as the group approaches. “Shanna” falls just in time for Spider-Man to swing in to catch her.

The group might have been fooled if not for Ms. Lion not liking her (who knew cartoon dogs were such excellent judges of character?), so the now-revealed Chameleon takes his revenge...

...by opening a trap door under Ms. Lion! Fortunately, Spider-Man grabs her before she falls.

The group chases “Shanna” into a maze of caves (pretty sure you can guess what happens here) The Chameleon hides as Firestar flies by, then transforms into her.

5 Little Superheroes want to know the score? One will run into herself, and then there will be four!

First off, shouldn’t that be “4 Little Superheroes”, since he already took out Shanna? Second, it’s now pretty apparent (well, a 50/50 chance) to the group who the next victim will be (unless the Chameleon plans on targeting Ms. Lion)

Fortunately, the group guesses correctly (or have they forgotten about Shanna?) and run after Firestar, who was scouting ahead, (have these people not learned to not let ANYONE out of their sight when there’s a shape-shifter around?!) but not fast enough...

...as Firestar encounters “Firestar”, who blasts her with freezing air, incapacitating her as she falls down a trap door!

Meanwhile, Shanna manages to free herself from the rubble (guess the count was right after all) and goes looking for the group (pretty sure we all know what’s about to happen...)

“Firestar” starts a recording as he joins the group, making everyone think he’s the real deal.

4 Little Superheroes, scared as can be...A demon will devour one, and then there will be three!

Right on cue, a robotic “demon” shows up to attack the group. Shanna chooses this moment to find the group, distracting them long enough for the demon to blast the group, sending everyone except Doctor Strange flying...

...then he eats Strange! Spidey deduces “Firestar” is not who he says he is, so the Chameleon runs off.

3 Little Superheroes, racing to pursue...But one will fall right off the bridge, and then there will be two!

In the middle of the Chameleon’s poem, he starts a tremor as Shanna falls (heh) behind. Spider-Man tries to web her...

...but she falls into the chasm below before the web reaches her! (not sure why he couldn’t try again...)

So with just the wall crawler and Iceman left, things seem grim. In desperation, the pair heads outside so Iceman can try to break through the force field again.

2 Little Superheroes out in the sun...the Iceman will be melted, and now there is but one!

Once again, the Chameleon strikes before he finishes speaking...

...this time with a heat ray that nullifies his ice powers, then a tractor beam to draw him back into the mansion!

[Gonna hit the pause button and go back 41 years to when I first saw the episode up to this point. I honestly was shocked that the show would kill off Captain America and Doctor Strange (I had no clue who Shanna was and, to be honest, Namor was being a complete ass and deserved what he got), but in both Iceman’s and Firestar’s cases, their fates were a bit more benign as Firestar was being incapacitated by icy jets of air (so essentially tortured instead of killed, then?) and Iceman was captured rather than given a death scene. I guessed this was because they had “star power” immunity and would eventually be rescued (I mean, they wouldn’t kill the title characters, right? Right?) Yes, now I know how things worked better, but my younger self...

Pause over, let’s resume]

It seems that Iceman and Firestar are imprisoned next to each other, so the Chameleon tricks them into using their powers on one another.

Meanwhile, web-head has re-entered the mansion. One rotating wall later, he falls into a web (ironic)

1 Little Superhero eaten to the bone...Leaving myself, the super super villain, all by myself alone!

A giant robotic spider comes across the web, hoping for a bit of cannibalism (of a sort, I guess...) Spidey discovers the “web” is made of electrical cables...

...so tears the end from one and jabs it into the spider, shorting it out with a jolt of deus ex supershit.

Escaping the room, he finds a room where all six “victims” are alive. (Cap, Strange, and Shanna are imprisoned, while Namor, Iceman, and Firestar are incapacitated by their weaknesses)

That’s when the Chameleon announces he has rigged the island with enough explosives to level it!

OK, the show time counter is at 21:21...let’s see if the bomb can be defused by 22:21.

[While we’re on the subject of suspension of disbelief, how the hell did the Chameleon get Namor out of the fire, Cap out of the quicksand, and Shanna out of the abyss...not to mention moving Iceman and Firestar from their cells to this chamber...when he has been sticking close to the heroes or in his control room the entire episode? Strange was obviously transported there by the robotic demon, but how did the Chameleon keep him from casting spells?

Soapbox over, now for the thrilling conclusion!]

First, Spidey redirects the heat lamp drying out Namor onto the block of ice imprisoning Firestar (wouldn’t she have suffocated by now?), with the melt flowing around Namor, reviving him, and Iceman, dousing his flaming cage. (29 seconds left according to the show time counter...) Namor then destroys the generator near the cage (guess it was electrified...? That explains why Cap wouldn’t just use his strength to bend the bars. 9 seconds to go, by the way...)

The Chameleon takes off in his helicopter (22:34; Everyone’s dead, including the Chameleon) and deactivates the force field. Doctor Strange magics everyone to the roof...

...and Spidey shoots a web onto the chopper, pulling himself up and inside. (Nice to know the Chameleon is polite enough to let the authorities know what vehicle he’s in)

Meanwhile, the timer is obviously running slow as it’s reading T-minus 20 seconds one minute and 49 seconds after the one minute timer started. (did you follow that?)

We switch back to the chopper where Spidey has finished tying up the Chameleon with webbing. (obviously the Chameleon got beat up off-camera where no parents could object) Spidey then grabs a megaphone and calls to the others.

7 Little Superheroes, get together gang...Swing on my spider-line cuz there’s gonna be a bang!

(No shit! It should have happened over a minute ago!)

The heroes fly off, abandoning poor Ms. Lion!

(The timer should have gone off a minute and sixteen seconds ago. The Chameleon really needs to not skimp on his timers next time) Firestar realizes they forgot the dog.

Spidey takes aim and shoots a line, snaring Ms. Lion and pulling her to safely as the explosives go off a minute and thirty-five seconds late!

The web-slinger give Ms. Lion the props she deserves for giving the heroes an unexpected edge as we fade out.

I really wonder what this tale would look like today with (limited) violence being allowed in televised animated programming. While Marvel obviously wouldn’t kill anyone, they could put the heroes in dire peril enough to take them out of action without seeming as contrived.

[glorified-red]

The Batboys' DnD Alignments

word count: 1,700~ warnings: none I briefly mentioned a DnD Alignment in Tim's Character Analysis and after an hour of thinking I realized I was wrong. I have since not had a cohesive thought other than DnD Alignments until I figured them out correctly. Also, being sick sucks

Dick Grayson: Lawful Good

Lawful Characters follow the rules, they respect a natural hierarchy, and believe in the power given by society

They also believe in honor, following traditions, and being trustworthy to their comrades

Dick Grayson has shown time and time again that he believes in the hope that Robin brings, he follows the rules laid in front of him by Batman and doesn’t consider breaking them often

Rules are in place to keep people safe and to instil the trust that the Robin mantle brings

Dick constantly sounds noble because of his Lawful alignment

Pair that with his second alignment, Good, it makes him sound even more charming

Good characters care about others and act in ways that help and benefit them

Dick will always strive to protect the people of Gotham because he cares for each of them so deeply

He also respects the symbol of hope on his chest and all the good it brings

Combined, Lawful Good characters always do the right thing as expected by society—Dick isn’t called the Golden Boy for nothing

Dick tells the truth and helps people because he likes to build trust and order, he’s a team leader and his team is built on morality

Dick has faith in social authority because he’s hardly put in a position where authority figures in his life let him down, his parents especially

Without rules there would be chaos

Justice is very important to these characters and we can see Dick upholding justice by law rather than his own personal sense of justice—he even became a police officer briefly to uphold social justice in a way that Robin couldn’t

He doesn’t like it when people get away with breaking the rules so he will step in to ensure chaos doesn’t win

Dick is often uncomfortable breaking the rules or going behind peoples backs, when he does, he has to talk himself through why what he’s doing is right

Whether thats for the betterment of society or the people he loves

He rarely does things for the sake of himself meaning he’s constantly putting others above himself and his needs

Lawful Good characters may seem noble but they can come off as arrogant or inflexible, stubborn or stuck-up

They may fail to understand why an individual would pursue their own freedom/interests over the greater good

Dick has this downside sometimes as well, he struggles to understand Jason’s morals and will try to bring him back to the family’s code

He’s constantly raising Damian to abide by the family code as well

When others persuade him to deviate from his codes, he can get incredibly uncomfortable, he’ll stand his ground in his beliefs despite what anyone tries to tell him

Jason Todd: Chaotic Good

Chaotic Characters aren’t random or disorganized in their actions, they just align on the opposite side of the ethics spectrum to Lawful Characters

Instead of abiding by the rules of society, Chaotic characters follow their own rules

They believe in personal freedom, individuality, and reaching their fullest potential

Jason is often defined under this

He works alone a lot because he doesn’t like following the orders of others and would rather life by his own terms

He distrusts and personally dislikes authority figures, he’ll even dismantle them himself if he wishes

He works with Outlaws like himself who don’t fit under the Lawful umbrella because he doesn’t need people telling him what to do

He knows what he’s doing is right and he doesn’t care how he goes about doing it

This usually makes Jason ethically gray

Jason’s ethical code is flexible to fit whatever situation he’s in and how it fits in his own agenda, regardless of the consequences

While this may sound like anarchy, Jason does have a moral compass, and a pretty Good one at that

Same as Dick, Jason cares about others and will go out of his way to make sure they’re taken care of

However, Jason will protect the innocent and weak because he’s seen society fail them

He’s not protecting them for the better good, Jason is protecting them because he’s been there and cares for these citizens from an empathic standpoint

Combined, Chaotic Good characters do what their conscience tells them is right in the given moment

Rules don’t matter, it’s about what is right

Jason will speak up for the people without voices, especially the people silenced by societal rules

He hates seeing good people being held back by unrighteous laws

Jason often seems strange or disorganized for not fitting into the expectations set out by his family, but he is still bringing hope and good to the world around him, he’s just going about it in a different way

Tim Drake: True Neutral

With the ethical Neutral Alignment, Tim follows rules and traditions, especially for the sake of honor and trust, yet he also abides by his own rules

Tim has never been known to following societal rules because he believes in them, he follows them because its convenient

He also follows his own rules quite often

He swings from both ethical sides of societal rules and the structure given to him from others while also abiding by his own ethical code

This is where Jason and Tim can seem very similar and may even hold the same alignment

However, Jason has a set code of ethics within himself, no structure, he also has a set form of morality

Tim has neither

He doesn't have a set ethical or moral compass, he swings from both side like a pendulum depending on what fits the best

Thats where he differs from the chaotic alignment despite it seeming like he’s chaotic

Tim is often seen as the “perfect” Robin because he follows Batmans rules to a T, yet behind the scenes, it’s quite a different story

He can work alone and go about things in an almost “evil” way

It’s not foreign for Tim to partner up with villains for the sake of achieving his goal

His morals are also incredibly unpredictable

This is why Tim has the second alignment of Neutral 

Neutral characters thrive in the middle ground, they fluctuate between the opposite sides of the spectrum but never hit the extremities

They wont harm innocents but won’t fail to step out of line

With Tim being on the neutral side, his loyalty to others is what drives his ethical code so even that is subject to change

He follows the action that has his best interest or the best interest of the people he cares about in mind, sometimes he'll even abide by societal expectations in the right situation

Combined, a True Neutral character behaves in a way that is unpredictable, flexible, and adaptable

Tim will follow the rules set out before him, but the actions he takes can sometimes be considered Good and then considered Evil by others

He helps people and carries out the Robin mantle for the betterment of those around him but in the same breath he’ll fail to tell the truth to his comrades

Tim mostly alignes with good actions because it results in a better outcome rather than him having a good alignment but that doesn’t stop him from stepping into an evil alignment

Tim doesn’t care about what his brothers think of his actions, he cares that his actions lead to the outcome he desires, and oftentimes that is for the sake of the mission

He likes rules, order, and proper organization—he likes structure, but his structure can be found in societal rules, family rules, or in himself

Tim also has no qualms with stepping out of that structure if the mission calls for it

Damian Wayne: Lawful Evil

Now a lawful character follows rules and structure, but no where does it say where that structure comes from or even if its good

Damian was raised under strict rules and a strict hierarchy to abide by, the structure he’s used to is cruel and harsh

Damian still believes in honor and in those traditions, but none of them are good and certainly don’t align with societal justice

A downside to lawful characters is blindly following rules without question, even if they don’t make sense

Damian blindly follows Talia and his grandfather because they are blood related, his loyalty lies with them

Damian can harshly judge others who don’t follow the same rules as him and will place his loyalty into structure rather than friends or family

This is Damian’s downfall, he is working on it though

With the way Damian was raised, he had no time for trustworthiness or loyalty to anyone else aside from the Demon Bloodline

It’s hard to shake that structure out of him, so when the Batfam eventually does, Damian still abides by structure, its just shifted to the Detective side, especially because of his relation to Bruce

A lawful character often has a dilemma when their structure is challenged or even shifts

The entire Robin run was Damian’s struggle with his ethical code changing

So when it shifts to a more positive light, Damian’s habits die hard

He’s used to following the rules by any means necessary

This is where his second alignment of Evil comes into play

Damian has never showed remorse for when he causes harm to those around him, he will take action against anyone whether they’re innocent or not (Tim)

Most Evil characters are aligned that way for a reason, Damian’s reason is mostly from following Ra’s

Combined, Lawful Evil characters follow their ordered system with little care for how they go about doing it

Evil characters often follow an evil moral code because of an evil ordered system, they just so happen to be following a leader blindly

This means that the second their Master stops adhering to the code, overthrowing them or finding a replacement can happen—Damian is no exception

Evil combined with order often leads to some very powerful movements and their ethics can be spread through force

Lawful Evil characters often preach their code or try to convert others to their code

Damian is seen doing this a lot, even after his ethics change to fit better into the batfamily’s

He's proud, what can he say

Taglist ♡

@anothertimdrakestan

@sunhats-and-candycorn

@missredrobin

[oh-my-moomin]

NGE: You Deserve Love

This is an analysis based solely on the og NGE anime series and not the movie or rebirth series so I won’t be mentioning those.

NGE is a psychological horror/apocalypse story dressed up as a mecha. This farce is only totally dropped in the last 2, even 3 episodes. This can make the ending jarring and seem in cohesive, but ultimately my understanding is that none of the ‘plot’ really matters. Seele doesn’t matter, where the angels come from doesn’t really matter, and the final battle doesn’t matter. This is a story exploring loss, the need for connection, loneliness, and humanity. We see this through not only the interactions of the human characters but also through the angels.

THE HUMANS

The Children

A defining trait of all the characters is that they are lonely. The isolation from human connection is brought on both by the high stress apocalypse they all live in, as well as the personal demons they face. The characters all attempt to create bonds with other people, but are held back by their insecurities, fear of vulnerability, and past traumas.

Let’s start with Shinji, as the main character. Having lost his mother at a young age, and being abandoned by this father, he was never able to feel secure. Therefore he takes on a people pleaser attitude, constantly apologizing. His want for validation (particularly from adults in his life) causes him to continue to take action that he doesn't want to, including piloting the EVA. His self hate and insecurity makes it hard for him to make and trust his own choices. So he relies on others to guide him. When this fails, when he doesn't get the love and validation he craves he tries to quite entirely. But this often leads to the people he cares about being hurt. He's trapped between a rock and hard place.

Asuka was also abandoned, however rather than craving support like Shinji, she chooses to live for herself. She craves independence. She needs to know that she is no longer a child that can be hurt and vulnerable. This is largely shown through both her overt sexuality, and her piloting the EVA. She must be in control of the EVA, she must have power, she must be able to prove herself as the best, the strongest. Because inside she still feels like that hurt desperate child, and that is what she hates most about herself. Unlike Shinji, Asuka is brash and rude, and she expects others to give her the same. She barks and expects you to bark back, but can’t always handle it. 

Both of these characters are constantly looking for connection, with both their peers and adults. While Asuka often pushes herself on to people, out of a need to be seen. Shinji cannot take active moves to make meaningful connections, and will shy away from people trying to connect. Asuka hates herself and needs to prove that others love her. Shinji hates himself and cannot imagine that people love him. 

The Adults

One of the running themes in the show is motherhood. Typically it is the mother that is expected to love and care for the child, to raise them, show unconditional love, give unwavering support. None of the characters have had this, Shinji and Asuka search for validation that they lost in adults in different ways. Unfortunately for them, none of the adults present are suitable to be parents. 

The show makes a point to show that the adult characters are all more complex than the children. They have lived longer and therefore had more time to make mistakes, to get stuck in toxic ideals, to ‘be problematic’. They are not concretely good or bad people (mostly), but rather the result of people who grew up in a post apocalyptic world, trying desperately to stop the salvage it, while also trying to make their own connections. Like the child characters, their past traumas make it harder for them to be more open, vulnerable, and weak, to form that human connection. 

I am going to focus on Misato and Ritsuko, since they act as foils when it comes to human connection.

Misato being left as a lone survivor to a terrible accident has left her scared both physically and mentally. Before this she had issues with her parents, as her father seemed to abandon his family in favour of work, leaving her mother devastated. Misato doesn't want to become like her mother, abandoned by a loved one, and she also doesn't want to be her father, a slave to work. To counter this she looks for easy connections, but she never wants to get too close.

When her relationship with Kaji was beginning to feel too real, she began to find flaws. His resemblance to her father was terrifying, so she broke it off. Similarly, when in scenes with Shinji, talking about his insecurities or his want to give up, she is hidden by shadow. She cannot be seen as weak, she cannot offer comfort, she cannot be a mother figure to Shinji. Other ways her searching for easy connection is her drinking beer, or eating take out. She searches for the most basic ways to fulfill her needs, so that she can focus on her main goal of defeating the angels. 

Ritsuko is also desperate to find human connection without vulnerability. By fully closing off the whole world she can have no weakness, something which she resents in Misato. She views herself as above the need for connection in that way, and would rather follow in her mothers foot footsteps as a scientist and a woman. 

She loved and admired her mother, and hated her. She wants to follow in her footsteps but also would hate to fail in the same ways. She saw how her mother failed to actually mother her, and chose to completely reject that part of herself. Instead she cares for cats, and uses those as a surrogate to having a child. She continues her mothers work as a scientist, constantly striving to improve. And when it comes to the ‘woman’ that her mother was, she knew a stubborn woman who focused solely on one man. So Ritsuko also focused on him, to the point of giving up her cat to her grandmother. Both women tried to create an easy connection with him, both felt that they were his equal, and that they found the one connection that mattered. When it was proven to them that they were a second (third) woman this caused them both to break down. For Ritsuko this meant that even though she closed off the whole world, except for one man, she was still too vulnerable. And her only response was to completely shut down. Because she had no one else.

All of the characters are constantly searching for this connection, trying to show affection without getting hurt. Trying to make sense of the end of the world while also making sense of interpersonal relationships. Their own inner demons getting in the way of honest connection. 

Rei

As a clone Rei is a particular case. She is aware that she is not a ‘person’, she isnt meant for human connection. Her isolation is so ingrained into her, planned before she is even ‘born’ so she feels no need to care for anyone except Ikari. She latches onto him, would do anything for him, and has no value in her life because she is aware that she is not real. 

However, she still has a human source, Shinjis mother. A human person, who also needed human connection. Rei, when given the chance, does care for people. Shinji is the first person to see her as a peer, and to treat her with kindness. With this start of forming connections, she begins to feel more human, to develop a further need to connect. Even if it's hard to fully separate from the man who created her.

THE ANGELS

The angels act as a foil to the human need for connection. While all of the human characters are lonely and searching for connection with each other, the angels are also lonely and trying to learn what that even means. 

There is no scene where the angels are working together, they are solitary, all having the same goal of reaching Adam, but incapable of planning together to achieve it. They instead try to create connection to humans, trying to bond and understand them, without knowing that their methods are harmful. 

I believe this can be first seen with the 12th angel. When Shinji is absorbed into the EVA, it is safe to say that the angel was able to understand the merging of human and EVA. This connection allowed Shinji to control the EVA to break free of the angel's shadow. The following month where Shinji is trapped within his EVA, is our first insight into what the human instrumentality project will be like, as well as the goals of the angels. 

Since angels cannot connect to each other, the 15th angel attempts to create connection by forcing itself into Asukas mind. It wants to understand her, her emotions, her thoughts, her connections, her love. For her this is a painful experience, akin to rape. She feels dirtied after it. But the attack is a beam of light, with holy music playing, what should be a calming experience. I believe it is fair to say that the angel cannot understand that it is putting her through pain, as it cannot understand any human experiences. Angels are incapable of understanding their own feelings/experiences/wants, and try to use humans as a study from which they can learn. 

The following angel confronts Rei about her loneliness. Instead of breaking into her mind through light, it directly entered her body. While talking with her, it questioned what loneliness was, trying to understand its own pain and isolation through understanding hers. Its solution is to merge with Rei, as it believes this would solve both problems. 

However, when she refuses, the angel then tries to find another source of connection. Rei cares about Shinji, as both a clone of his mother, and a friend as her own person. The angel can see that this connection is something that she finds precious and tries to take it for itself, as it cannot understand why Shinji wouldn’t feel the same. It cannot understand how complex human connections are, that it cannot simply take Reis form. However, it has learned what pain is, and how to communicate its own pain. As seen when Shinji attacks it. Whether this pain is physical or emotional doesn't matter, because it is the first pain that the angel could express.

The angels discovering what loneliness is acts as a way for the human pilots to begin to explore their own isolation in more depth. For better or worse.

THE FINAL MESSENGER

Our introduction to the final angel is him singing. He takes a human form, can fully communicate to other humans, and doesn’t immediately attack them. This is such a contrast to all other angels that it isn't immediately clear that he even is an angel. Kaworu's first words are (as per the netflix english subtitles)

“Arent songs great? Songs enrich the heart. They're the crowning achievement of Lilin culture” 

He loves humans, human culture, human lives, and the human world. He is the first angel who is able to show this. His ability to understand humans allows him to form human connections, and he does so with Shinji. 

Kaworu loved Shinji. He would seek out Shinji, take time to bond and communicate with him, and help Shinji open up. He wanted to be close with Shinji, and knew how to be gentle in ways that no other human or angel could. He was patient, because he had time. And Shinji was able to open up to him more than with any other character. Shinji  was able to take the initiative to ask to stay with him, to try and form that connection.

All the human characters are struggling with their own demons, with an apocalyptic world. The whole earth is at war and Shinji is in the front lines, surrounded by adults who may want to help him but ultimately can't. Saving everyone is a higher priority to saving one kid, especially when that kid is your strongest soldier. Throughout the series Shinji is given conditional love. It is only when he pilots the EVA, defeats the angels and saves the day that people give him validation. Then comes this boy, who is gentle and kind, who listens. And it's easy, its comfort, its understanding and unconditional love, and its exactly what Shinji has needed for the whole series. 

But as a messenger he could never stay, he's temporary and by the end of the episode he understands this. He still is driven to ‘Adam’, he has a mission, but instead he is confronted with Lilith. Kaworu understands that humans and angels cannot live together in harmony, only one can survive. Both Adam and Litlith were made in god's image, but only Adam could stay in the garden of Eden. Death and Life hold equal value to Kaworu, so he doesn't mind the sacrifice, he would rather die to protect humans, to protect Shinji. He can  also understand that this is difficult, this is murder, this is killing a friend. So he says “thank you” and he waits.

In other episodes when in a battle, Shinji is constantly being yelled at, told what to do, under constant pressure. But here there is just the same patient understanding that Kaworu has always shown him. No rush for him to take action, just time to process and grieve. Because Kaworu knows Shinji will make the hard choice and he waits, and he smiles, and he continues to love Shinji. 

The final angel came down as a messenger and said

“You are important. 

I want to talk to you, to know you. 

You are in pain, you are fragile and should be protected. 

You are worthy of my affection. 

I like you. I love you. I was born just so that I could meet you. 

Our kind cannot survive together, one of us must die. And you deserve to live. 

I will take this burden of death because you deserve a future. 

I am glad I could meet you, thank you. 

I know this is hard, and I know you need time. I will wait.

Thank you.”

That was the last message to humanity.

And because Shinji is human he says back

“We are the same. I love you too. If only one of us could have lived it should have been you. You are better than me. You should have survived.”

[crashdevlin]

Opposites Don’t Attract (A Witcher Fic)

Author’s Note: This was written while I was fighting Covid19...so I’m pretty proud of that. I'm aware that not everyone likes the Witcher but this was the only thing that would could out of my head that week so...

I took bits of lore from the show, the books, and the games and mixed them all up into a cohesive awesomeness...also, the smut is pretty good, but the banter is where it's at with this one. If you guys like this, I might make it a series...so, let me know how you're feeling on it.

Summary:  Y/n is a witcher from the Cat School (a nomadic school that is one of the few that actually makes female witchers) who keeps running into Geralt of Rivia...to her great pleasure.

Pairing: Geralt x Female Witcher!Reader, mentions of Geralt x Yennefer and Geralt x Triss Merigold

Word count: 3869

Story Warnings: 18+! HERE BE SEX!! DON’T READ IF YOU’RE A YOUNG’UN!!!, unprotected sex, creampie, mentions of infertility, little bit of angst (it's a Cassie story...what do you expect?)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn’t often you crossed paths with the White Wolf. The Continent was vast and you both had work to do. But it was always a treat when you walked into a tavern and smelled the man.

"Geralt. What brings you to Kagen?" you asked, taking the stool next to him at the bar.

"A contract."

"Always so succinct, Wolf...and just a bit disrespectful. Isn't my school the one that's supposed to birth disreputable thugs?"

Amber eyes turned on you as you fiddled with your medallion, a silver coin with a cat's head on a silver chain. It hung right between your breasts and never came off.

"Here to kill a monster...or be a monster?" he asked, his voice a deep rumble.

A zing of indignant fury went through you but you stifled it instinctively. "I haven't taken a contract against a human in nearly twenty years. I've learned the error of my ways. I told you as such when we met last. Remember? The bard's impromptu celebration in Lyria." He grunted softly at you and looked away. "You do remember, don't you, Geralt?"

"My memory is fine, Feline."

"Then you remember folding me in on myself and making my body quake?" You set your hand on his thigh and watched his face for a reaction.

He gave no indication he even noticed your fingers over the conditioned leather. "Since when do you call them 'humans'? When last we met, you were still calling them by the slur."

You rolled your eyes. "That was a single slip. Another thing I've seen the error on. I've developed, I've grown. You have to admit that some things are hard to shake, like a word you shouldn't say or a prejudice you were taught as a small child. I wasn't really given a choice on who to sympathize with in the conflict. Cats and Elves, we go together. Call it a commiseration of outcasts."

He let out a long sigh before dropping his hand to yours. "You talk too much, Cat."

"Well, someone has to fill the silence around you. Jaskier doesn't seem to be around right now, so I'll take that mantle." You licked your lips and hummed as his fingertips slowly caressed the back of your hand. "I could help you fulfill your contract. Two witchers are better than one. What are you after?"

He turned his head just enough to catch your eyes. "You want to help me?"

"I want to fuck you, but I feel you're going to be distracted until you've got your coin so I might as well hasten that instance."

"Can I trust you to have my back in battle?"

You pulled your hand away and shook your head. "If I can alter my preconceived notions of humans, you can alter your notions of Felines. Or, in the very least, of me." You caught his eyes and held them without blinking. "I have known you for decades, Geralt. Can you trust me to have your back?"

He held your eyes for a few moments before he picked up his ale. "It's a graveir. Strength is more important than speed."

"Well, then I'll just have to pull its attention and hope it is hungry for witcher." You smiled. "And you can kill it before it eats me."

He smiled just a bit as he set his mug down. "Perhaps I'll let it eat you, kill it while it is sated and happy."

"Aww, but then the great White Wolf would never get to eat his fill of this Feline ever again."

He smirked as you set a coin on the bar and requested an ale of your own. "And what brought you to Kagen, Y/n?"

You smiled at the use of your name. "Tracking a man." His eyebrow went up so you clarified. "Just tracking. He's a historian. There's some question of the authenticity of some of the Aen Seidhe artifacts he's 'found'. He's at the whore house two down so I thought I'd have a drink while he was busy. A lucky stroke to find you."

"If you help me with the graveir, you might lose him."

You took a drink of your ale and turned on the stool. "You think we can't take down a graveir and have a fun night before a middle-aged human historian wakes from his well-deserved nap after a night of lust away from his wife?" You leaned next to his ear and whispered, "Are you underestimating me or yourself?"

"I could never underestimate you." He tipped his head back and finished off his ale and you chugged down your own. It was time to work.

As you moved to follow Geralt out of the tavern, a tall man with a sunburned face stepped in front of you.

"I didn't know they made witchers with tits," the foul-smelling farmer said with a guffaw at the end for good measure.

"Well, you've never seen the Butcher of Blaviken with his shirt off, have you?" you snapped, stepping away from him.

"You're a real one, then? You got the eyes, I see. They do all those mutations on you? Hear witchers are like a bitch in heat but cain't procreate. Now there's a perfect woman, right? Always ready to be filled, but never able to give me any more little brats."

Geralt sneered at the man's words but you just shook your head. "I guarantee no woman wants to be filled by you or your brats. Especially not this woman."

The drunk looked offended for a moment before he scoffed. "You're not a woman. You're a fuckin' mutant. Wouldn't want your-"

A blade was in your hand and held against his throat in a flash. "I'm a fucking mutant and a fucking woman and I want nothing to do with you."

"Apologize," Geralt demanded, quiet and intent.

The drunk looked down at the knife and blinked a few times, then nodded. "Sorry."

Your blade was back in its sheath on your hip before he could take another breath. "Let's go, Geralt."

"Hmm." He pulled open the large wooden door and walked out, you followed.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"When's the last time you saw the Caravan?" Geralt asked as you headed for the woods.

"You really don't think I've changed, do you?" He gave a noncommittal grunt so you rolled your eyes. "Even after that slime back at the tavern? I didn’t kill him. I didn't even hurt him. I didn't even spout off and call him a...well, if anyone deserves to be slurred, it's a man like that and I held my tongue." You reached out and slapped your hand across his chain mail. "Haven’t seen hide nor hair of Dyn Marv in…"

You rubbed your fingers across your eyes and shook your head. "I abandoned the Caravan the day I met you. The ideals were harder to shirk but I left my school the moment I realized that Gezras wasn't quite the savior they claimed. You had it right. You and the others up at Kaer Morhen, you know how...how a witcher's supposed to act. You were trained in the codes and morals, I wasn't."

"No, you were trained blindfolded on a tightrope across the rooftops of Oxenfurt."

"Let it never be said that Cat School is without our flair." You smiled over at him. "And it was Oxenfurt, the Cintran Capital, and Vengerberg. Nomads and all that."

Geralt looked over at you and smiled. "I can imagine the Cintran guard were very happy to have a bunch of witchers crawling across their roofline."

"Oh none of them ever cared for having a bunch of witchers in their city let alone running training exercises across their roofs. But not a one tried to stop us. You'll recall, there was a time when most feared and respected us more than they hated us."

"I don't recall people ever fearing Cat School," he teased.

"Ah-ha, you're so hilarious, Geralt. My sides are in stitches from all this laughter," you responded dryly.

You walked in relative silence for a few moments, your boots making no sound on the tall grass. "I didn't know meeting Vesemir affected you so much," he said eventually.

"Oh, yes. It was wise old Vesemir that showed me the error of my ways, not the dashing white-haired man who rode into Novigrad after him."

"Dashing. That's a new one."

"I'm absolutely certain it is not a new one, Geralt. Not for any woman who's had the pleasure to make your acquaintance." Your cheeks heated up in a way you imagined his never did. Wolves dulled emotion. So did Bears, and Vipers, and most schools. Most pushed down emotions to make a witcher less susceptible to fear and anger and sadness. Cat School was different. You were reminded of that every time you were around Geralt. "I bet 'dashing' would be one of the first words they'd use to describe you: the Triss Merigolds and Yennefer of Vengerbergs of the world."

He looked over at you as you approached a cemetery filled with recent dead from a bandit attack on the outskirts of Kagen. "Hmm. Is that jealousy I hear?"

"No!" you responded just a little too loud. "What do I have to be jealous of? They're two supernaturally beautiful sorceresses who've been part of your life much longer than I have. Besides, none of us really gets you for more than a night or two, right?"

He grunted softly in agreement, then offered a potion from his belt. You took it and swallowed it down, feeling your already-fast reflexes get a boost. "You're supernaturally beautiful too. It will make you better graveir bait."

You couldn’t focus on the compliment he'd given you as he pointed to a bloated ghoul digging into a fresh grave with short, strong claws. He was gone by the time you looked back but you could sense him moving around the outside of the cemetery.

Normally, this was the point when you'd draw your silver; approaching a ghoul as it ripped a limb from a corpse to make its meal for the night. The sword stayed on your back with your steel, however. You were to take its attention so Geralt could kill it from behind.

It was fairly easy, actually. You and Geralt, working in tandem, had the graveir as dead as his dinner before there was a chance for real trouble. It noticed you, it rushed you, you dodged and dodged and threw a punch or three to its ugly face and then Geralt appeared in your vision and the graveir met the sharp blade of a witcher's silver sword. No muss, very little fuss, and very little blood.

"You did good as bait," Geralt commented as you walked back toward the city. "Maybe I should have you play the snack on hunts more often."

"Oh? A snack for the monsters or a snack for yourself?"

"I'm serious. We work well together."

"It's not the first time we've worked together."

There had been, in fact, two other monsters that you helped Geralt with. A wraith terrorizing a man in Novigrad that you helped him with when you first met each other and a wyvern you encountered on the road. Geralt happened to have the contract on the wyvern and showed up to take it down as you were in the midst of killing it.

He graciously shared a portion of the coin garnered from his contract.

He hummed in acknowledgement. “You should come with me.”

You stopped and turned to look at him. “What?”

“Once you’ve fulfilled your contract on the historian, you should saddle up and travel with me. You said it yourself, ‘two witchers are better than one’.”

You looked up into his eyes and blinked a few times. “You miss Vesemir so much that you would travel with me just to have another witcher at your side?”

“Why don’t we leave it at ‘I enjoy your company’?” he suggested.

You started walking again, heading toward your mare, a Konik named Daisy, and Geralt’s mare, Roach. “Will you be staying in Kagen for a while?”

“I have a room at the inn. I can stay in Kagen until you return.”

“You’re serious about me coming with you? I thought sweet nothings were whispered in the throes of passion, not in the aftermath of battle.”

“You don’t have to come with me, Y/n.”

You shook your head. “I’ll have to think about it, Geralt.” You didn’t want to anger any sorceresses. You climbed up into Daisy’s saddle and grabbed her reins. “For now, let’s go to the inn. A bath and a bed sound amazing,” you said, before riding toward the city.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The tub was small but you weren’t large. “How do you fit in this thing?” you asked, dunking yourself under the warm water.

“I’m very good at fitting into tight spaces.” Geralt stepped up behind you and kneeled down, setting his chin on your bare shoulder. “Do you need help getting clean?”

“No. But I’d love a bit of help getting dirty again after I’m done.” He hummed and nodded, turning his head to press his lips to your neck. You hummed happily and turned your head to give a bit more access and he took the invitation, running his hand down your body and under the water. You gasped as his fingers brushed your curls. “I’m not clean yet, Geralt.”

“Clean enough.”

You pressed closer to him, arching your hips and reaching back to grab the back of his head, pulling him further down. “More,” you whispered. He chuckled, slipping a finger down to tease your entrance. “Fuck, don’t tease.”

“Why not?” He nipped at your jawline and gave a low hum. “You know...the first time I heard your voice, I knew I’d have to hear you moan.” You gasped as his finger slipped into you down to the knuckle, your fingers digging into his scalp as the heel of his palm pressed into your clit. “I knew I’d have to feel you cum on my cock when I smelled you in the heat of battle.”

You moaned at the thought of Geralt, barely knowing your name, deciding that he’d have to have you just based on scent. It was something so animalistic, so inhuman...so uniquely witcher.

You twisted in the water and wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a fierce kiss. You didn’t wait for an invitation into the cavern of his mouth, tugging on his bottom lip with your teeth as he gathered your body in his arms and carried you to the lumpy bed across the room. You pushed at his clothes without breaking the kiss, desperate to taste and feel him. Your fingers skimmed across the lines of his back muscles as you pulled his shirt off. His fingertips dug into your hips and moved to put bruising pressure on your ass as you started untying his trousers.

The man was a specimen. The mages at Kaer Morhen made the best of him. You didn’t have time to examine the body and the cock that were so prominent in your wettest dreams because he was obviously just as desperate for you. He got his trousers down and reached between your bodies, taking his length in hand and smearing the head of it in the wetness seeping out of you. You were just about to start begging when he slipped his cock into your cunt.

You lifted your hips to get more of him inside of you. You needed him stretching you and stuffing you. You needed him pushing you to the absolute limits. He fit you better than any ever had.

He rocked his hips against yours, his pelvis putting pressure against your clit as his cock barely moved against your walls. You wrapped your legs around him, ankles crossed at the small of his back, urging him deeper. He growled and grabbed your wrists, pulling your hands from his shoulders to pin them to the bed above your head.

No other man could put you in such a position. No other man controlled you like Geralt. You would never think to let it happen. No man, not even another witcher, could play you like such a fine instrument. A beautiful lute.

Part of you wished you didn't heal so efficiently, so quickly. Part of you wanted to wear his marks upon you for days, but his marks, just like the scent of your coupling, faded far too quickly for your liking. It left you with nothing but the memory and that just wasn't enough. Not when the man you were remembering was so...amazing.

You whimpered out a faint request and he heeded it, slamming his hips into yours harder. You struggled against his grip, desperate to get your hands in his hair, wanting to tug on the white locks, but he refused to relinquish control of your wrists. He gave you everything you needed, but not necessarily what you wanted.

Like you wanted to hear his voice, but the only time you really needed to hear it was when he leaned down next to your ear and demanded, “Cum, Cat.” Your toes curled and your head pressed back into the pillow, your hips arching closer to his as that finally cracking pleasure fell over you. Geralt lasted a while longer before he filled you, his cock pulsing against your walls as his breath caught in his chest, fingers tightening around your wrists as he came.

He pressed sweet kisses along your jawline as he pulled his half-hard member from your dripping pussy and his hands released your wrists to slide his fingers up to entwine with yours. You ended up with your legs tangled with his, neither of you seeming to care about the wetness of sweat and cum sticky between both of your thighs. You kept one of your hands clutched in his, but pulled the other away so that you could run your fingers through his hair as you stared at the ceiling.

“Do you give it much thought?” you asked, quietly. He made a questioning noise and popped open one eyelid to look up at you from where his head was on your breast. Your cheeks heated up and you licked your lips. “What they did to us. What the mages made of us. What they took from us.”

“Took?”

“Options. The options they took from us. We were children, Geralt. We were babies. They stole…” You cut your words off with a shake of your head. “I guess I’m the only one who thinks about it...and I can’t really imagine being some normal peasant wife with a litter of children and a world of misery, but I...I guess there’s some sweetness in the simplicity of their lives, you know? And I hate that I was never given that option. I was deprived of simplicity before I was even aware there was a difference between the folk in the Caravan and the rest of the world.”

Geralt was silent, but the way his fingers tightened their grip upon your hand filled you with a sense of calm. “People hate us, Geralt. They think us heartless, emotionless, cold. I learned to fake it, because that’s what people expect from someone with two blades on their back and these lovely eyes, but-”

“Cat School doesn’t dull emotions.”

“No. Not even with training. That’s a learned reaction to the outside world. I miss Dyn Marv fiercely sometimes because it’s...lonely away from people who understand. It’s hard to walk the Continent alone.”

He closed his eye and shifted a bit against you. “Why aren’t you with them, then?”

“Differences of morality.”

He was silent for a few minutes, just the sound of your breathing filling the room. “Opposites attract.”

“What?”

“It’s something the bard says. The idiot heard it from an alchemist once and he likes to believe it applies to relationships too. It’s why he goes after beautiful, cultured, married women. ‘Opposites attract’.” He sat up and looked down into your eyes. “But it’s horseshit. We look for companions that remind us of us. It’s why all of his women are as enamored with him as he is. Opposites don’t attract, Y/n...and that’s why you are someone I can’t say ‘no’ to.”

“Because we’re so alike?” you guessed.

“Yes.”

“Just because I’ve changed though, right?”

“No. You changed because you weren’t truly that woman. You were what the mages made you. What your teachers made you. You changed when you decided to.”

You licked your lips again and sat up a bit on your elbows. “What about your sorceresses?”

He smirked a little. “I don’t have sorceresses, Y/n.”

“Lovers. Ex or current?” you simplified the question.

“Current. Obviously,” he said, sarcastic humor in his voice as he ran his hand down your body.

You rolled your eyes and tried to ignore the way his touch lit your skin aflame with sparks of desire. “Geralt, I’m serious. If Yennefer were to ride into Kagen right now...if she knocked on that door…”

“Yen would just walk in. She’s never been one for other peoples’ privacy.” He leaned his head down when you didn’t express amusement at his jest, pressing his forehead to yours. “I could lie.”

“Not really. You’ve not proven yourself a good liar, Wolf.”

“True. I prefer honesty.” He sighed and looked away, sitting up to lean his back against the wall.

“Would you turn her away? Would you turn away Triss?” You sighed heavily. “I’m not trying to sound...like such a sodding woman, but...Geralt, you asked me to come with you. That seems like-” His pensive face made you question what you were even trying to get at. “You know what? I think it’d be better if I just head back to my job following Professor Lery and-”

“Don’t.” He grabbed your arm as you moved to get off the bed. “I care for Triss and I think I...loved Yennefer. But I...don’t think we’ll be an option again. She’s been upset at me since Triss.”

“Won’t this-”

“Stop questioning everything.” You closed your eyes as he leaned over and kissed you again. “Stay.”

“I have to finish the contract, Geralt. I’ve already been paid a hundred-fifty gold for it.”

“Then come back,” he demanded softly.

You smiled at him and nodded, but your heart was far less resolute than you were pretending. “Of course. Don’t go anywhere.” You rolled off the bed and grabbed your trousers and shirt, dressing hastily before grabbing your swords and potion belt. You kissed him one more time before leaving the room, swiping a loaf of bread off of a table in the tavern on your way out.

You weren’t sure if you were coming back to him. You wanted nothing more, but you weren’t looking forward to the moment one of his sorceresses came to call. “I’ll decide while I finish this job,” you told your horse, patting her lovingly. “Maybe it should just stay you and me, huh, Daisy. Maybe two witchers aren’t better than one.”

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: January 28th, 2021 (Part 1)

And we’re back with many more ask answers! Thank you for waiting.

Is lizzie/the main character tripping over a rock a random event in barbecue? or does it require certain choices? i picked the same choices in multiple different playthroughs but ended up with three different outcomes (1. nothing happens 2. liz trips 3. i trip)

Yep! It’s completely random. Just a little moment of life you don’t have control over, haha.

wait just double checking you stated that derek would be another romantic interest you can pursue in step 4 right??? im just asking cuz hes my fav character 

oh wait and btw i was the one that asked the question about derek being in the step 4 just now, and will you have to pay extra for like a dlc or something bc i play the free version rn and i just wanted to check!! 

Yeah, you will eventually be able to romance him, but unfortunately it is a paid DLC. Cove is the only love interest who’s entirely free-to-play. You can  follow our social media for when we giveaways for a chance to win a key for it, though.

i know that y’all said the step 3 dlc and step 4 will be released early 2021, is there any update to that? for example, a rough amount of days/weeks until release? no pressure at all, i’m super excited!! <3 

The Step 3 DLC will be about in maybe two-two and half months or so. Step 4, we’re not entirely sure. Maybe a few months after the Step 3. We don’t want to give set dates until we’re really close to the release since otherwise we wouldn’t be able to 100% guarantee them.

First off love the game. Second I'm a little confused on how the nsfw dlc is gonna work. Because based on some stuff you've said it sounds like a patreon only thing and others make me think it could be an itch/steam thing after the fact? Would you mind clarifying for me 😅. Also if it's a patreon only thing do you need to become one before it's released? 

It’s not going to be on Steam/Itch. The actual game of Our Life is safe for teens with no adult content. Any 18+ stuff we’re releasing is separate bonus content. Right now the only for sure plan is having it available through Patreon. If there’s another hosting site that’s not Steam or Itch that’d be easier for people than Patreon we might consider uploading it there too, but nothing else is set.

If you want the bonus Moment you’d have to join once it’s already out or sometime after the release. Joining now would get you our current rewards, but wouldn’t get you future content that’s coming later.

this is probably an awkward question and i apologize, feel free not to answer, but i just wanted to address the elephant in the room....will step 4 acknowledge covid/2020 world events?? i kind of hope not bc i'd like to just exist in a fictional version of the world where things are happy in this quaint seaside town and the world isn't falling apart, but i'd understand if there are some references to it. just thought i'd ask so i can Prepare if that makes sense

Step 4 isn’t going to include Covid or even reference it. When we set Step 4 in that year we definitely didn’t know there’d be a global pandemic during it. It’s too late to move the timeframe earlier or later, but we’re not going to make Step 4 stressful for anyone because the real world became so much more stressful. The universe of Our Life will just be an even more idealized place than it was before.

hiiiii! i'm really sorry if this is a bother. i was just curious if cove has a canon setting for each step, like is it canon that he stays candid the whole game and is super sporty for instance and the rest are variations? thank you for your time!

None of those settings are canon. They’re all equally valid.

I love the game and Cove so much that I ended up spending most of the holidays playing it. Definitely worth it! Idk if you're taking suggestions/criticisms, but I chose the peach skin tone and seeing it written as "my peach skin" in the game broke immersion for me because I kept thinking it was referring to the fruit instead of my skin color. I think that skin color is most commonly referred to as "fair" but "peachy" or "rosy" would work too if you're looking for a different word 

Thank you for sharing your experience. We’ll change it to “peachy” in the next update!

So I accidentally overwrote a save file with a different one, is there any way I can recover that save? 

Sadly, there isn’t. Not unless you had a backup of the actual save file files in a separate location you can get. I’m really sorry. You can try using the skip feature to quickly speed through the game and get back to where you were though.

Do you try to maintain the color scheme for the clothing throughout the years in Our Life? 

Yes, though in hindsight not as much as I wished I did, haha. It could’ve been a little more cohesive. It was a bit too broad in my opinion.

I noticed that Cliff mentions he wasn’t much older than Cove before finding out he was going to be a father when he finds MC in bed with Cove during Part 3 so doesn’t that Cliff and Kyra were teenage/young parents? 

Yeah, Cliff was nineteen and Kyra was eighteen when Cove was born. They were just a couple of kids.

Does Cove have a favourite holiday? 

It changes depending on the year. Around Step 1 he’s not a huge fan of a lot of holidays because he’s not together with his whole family for them. But once he’s older and Kyra comes around more, he starts appreciating major family holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas more than other holidays because he knows how it feels not to have that. Though summer vacation is of course his most favorite all the time, if that counts as a “holiday”.

I tried to join your patreon but I can’t seem to? The website keeps saying something went wrong and to try again. 

I’m sorry you’re having trouble! I think contacting Patreon support would probably be the best option if the joining process itself is having issues.

How much is it to become a part of your Patreon? I don’t have a lot of money currently but would love to help you out more than just buying the games and dlcs. 

Aw, I appreciate you wanting to support but the Patreon is really optional. You don’t need to push yourself to join if you don’t have extra funds for it. To still answer the question, the tiers are $1, $5, $10, $15, and $20 in USD. Each come with different perks.

I had this idea for a future daughter for the MC and Cove being named "Poppy", after the flowers on their hill~

That’s a really sweet idea! I’m sure Cove would be a fan.

So if you don't mind me asking, how do you get Cove to propose to you in Step 4 and not the other way around? 

I’m afraid that’d be too big of a spoiler to give away before the epilogue’s release, at least in terms of specifics. Generally you’ll just have to be patient and try not to propose first, haha.

will we get to move in with cove in step 4 😮?? or is that a secret 

You can be living together with Cove in Step 4! Though you wouldn’t get to see the place itself. That’s up to your imagination.

Is it bad that I'm completely in love with Cove's dad... What I gotta pay to romance Cliff 😭 (I don't mean as Jamie because that would be wack) 

That’ll cost one million 20 twenty dollar bills, haha. I’m really glad you like him, though sadly we aren’t able to make a separate game where you can romance Cliff. I wish we had enough time to make tons of new scenes/extra stories in the Our Life world, but it just takes too long. Maybe people will make fanworks about it.

—–

We released a new FAQ! It answers common questions and we’ll keep adding more to it. Please check there before sending an ask. FAQ   Also, if you prefer to just see the main posts without all the asks/reblogs, feel free to follow our side account instead: GB Patch Updates Blog  

[shoichee]

Hello and congrats on the 100 milestone! Can you do prompt #19 for Midorima? 😁

MAN OH MAN IT’S BEEN A LONG TIME BUT I’M FINALLY BACK, TSYM for being here since the beginning, i rlly rlly appreciate it <333 so HERES SOME FLUFF

Midorima x Reader

19. “I think I’m in love with you, and that scares the crap out of me”

Word Count: 3349

prompt list here

»»—————　☼　—————««

“Seriously, are you sure you’re not secretly related to Shin-chan?” Takao shoves another helping of rice into his mouth and you instantly frown at his messy eating habits.

“Takao, it doesn’t hurt to wipe the grains off your cheeks with napkins that the cafeteria always abundantly provides,” you say, not once taking your eyes off of the study guide you compiled for the class final. “And please don’t talk with your mouth open.” You can easily sense Takao groaning before slapping his eyes while leaning back in frustration, but you still carried on in skimming your notes instead.

“And that’s exactly why Shin-chan doesn’t know how to approach you,” he petulantly mumbles. You spared a glance above your packets, not catching his inaudible words.

“Pardon?”

“Never mind,” Takao sighs, settling to childishly stabbing the shrimp tempuras with his chopsticks and popping them into his mouth. “You werdn’t gert it.”

“What did I just say about your eating manners?” You roll your eyes, choosing to brush off his words as you continue to devote your attention to your papers. Takao simply opts to noisily munch on the rest of his lunch while being deep in thought, letting you study in some relative peace. He then gets up, tosses his trash away, and plops back down on his seat, and he props up his chin on his arm, watching you completely engrossed in your own world and figuring out how to exactly figure out his next best course of action.

“Y’know what? Screw this, I’m not getting paid to be a wingman for two difficult people,” he dramatically sighs, purposely trying to get your attention, and it worked. “You might wanna start paying attention to poor Shin-chan before he over thinks himself to death.” Takao does an exaggerated shrug and a shake of his head to emphasize the “seriousness” of the situation. You merely frown.

“You never cease to amaze me with your convoluted words. If you want something from me, just spit it out already.” You reluctantly let down your papers to give him your undivided attention, and Takao leans closer, dropping his voice to a hush.

“Look, I know you see him in a different light from the others,” he whispers conspiringly. “And he does too.” He makes pointer-finger motions in front of him to represent “you” and “Midorima.”

“... This again?” You pinch your nose bridge and release a harsh sigh, but you nonetheless let Takao continue.

“Come on, would it really hurt to do a confession? For someone so blunt and straightforward, you’re really dragging this out for way too long.” Takao frowns at your deadpan expression but continues his little movements with his makeshift “finger puppets.” “Once you”—he takes his left index finger—“and Shin-chan”—he brings his right index closer to his left—“do the chu”— he brings his index fingers together to imply the situation—“I can finally be free from the clutches of Shi—”

“I already told you,” you smoothly interrupt, “that we don’t see each other that way. He’s been a reliable partner in class projects and a very helpful person to share notes with. I’m very certain it’s like that on his end with me too.”

“Why do you sound so disappointed when you say it like that?” Takao slowly grows a shit-eating (yet hopeful) smirk. You scowl at his implications. Takao amusedly notes that you’re way too similar to his best friend.

“There’s no chance that we’ll ever get to that stage… ever. Okay? Satisfied now?”

“So you are disappointed at the possible outcome,” Takao gleefully says, his face showing all signs of plans being concocted in his mind. You completely widen your eyes at your simple slip-up.

“I… it’s not a possible outcome, damn it,” you vehemently insist. “It’s a guarantee.”

“Puh-lease (y/n)-chan, how do you know unless you try it?”

“Alright Takao,” you dryly reply. “Why don’t you try staring directly at the sun first before confirming that you become blind from that?”

“That’s not the same!”

“Same logic,” you huff. “Look, you know Midorima-san more than anyone, and even you know how he thinks. He finds the concept of friends and teammates to be pretty unnecessary, and frankly I can empathize with him. If he finds camaraderie to be a hassle already, dating is already beyond off the table. It takes much more to be a genuine friend to him than your average person, and if I do, by chance, confess, I’d be throwing away everything that I built up with him like an idiot… just being like this with him is more than enough for me. Besides, a relationship isn’t important right now, not when class takes up most of the time.”

“Well, normally yes, but in this specific case, there’s an excep—”

“I already came clean with this,” you say, furrowing your brows. “So can you finally let me study for this class in peace? Obviously, it’s a given for you not to open your mouth to anyone else about this.” With that, you tune out any further noise and burrow yourself into your class materials, and Takao could only sigh as he tries to wrack his brain for another way to play wingman.

“... Seriously, they’re both so stubborn.”

———

“(y/n)-san.”

“Hm?”

You turn around from looking at the bulletin to the person who just addressed you. Midorima stares down at you quite seriously before he promptly clears his throat.

“You’re blocking the way, nanodayo.”

“Ah… I apologize,” you say, immediately stepping closer to the bulletin to clear up the hallway. You turn your face to appear fixated on the bulletin board, but still sensing Midorima staring at you, you reluctantly peek at him from your peripheral vision. “... Is there something else you need, Midorima-san?” Midorima looks at the bulletin board for a moment before he turns back to your face.

“Regarding the group project we were paired to do in chemistry,” he starts, “the teacher praised our work very highly and wants to know if he can use it as an example for future lectures. I’m here to hear your answer on his behalf.”

You mentally sigh from the secretive disappointment. Of course Midorima was here for straightforward business. Nothing more, nothing less. Still, Takao’s words begin flitting through your mind now… of all times.

“Of course he can use it,” you smile. “I think it’s an honor to have our project regarded so highly like that, especially since so much effort was put into it… although… I think you’re the reason why we received such a high score, Midorima-san.” You train your gaze on Midorima, trying to gauge his reaction from the compliment, but he gives no such sign away, not any that you were aware of as far as you were concerned.

“(y/n)-san, I believe your own efforts and work ethic shouldn’t be trivialized,” Midorima replies, briefly closing his eyes and adjusting his frames. “After all, you are the one who made this project a cohesive final product, one that is also comprehensible to other peers in our presentation.”

“Ah… well…” You were definitely thrown in for a loop, not expecting Midorima to compliment you back so openly, albeit probably not for the reasons you were hoping for. “... Thank you, Midorima.” In an attempt to curb your growing flusteredness, you opted to stare at the bulletin board again, pretending to be occupied in reading the pinned papers.

“... Right.” Midorima softly clears his throat. “I’ll be taking my leave back to the faculty office. It was good talking to you.”

He swiftly turns around and walks back in the direction he came from, and when you were certain that he was walking judging from his footsteps, you turn your head to stare at his back before averting your gaze.

You frown once he exits out of your sight as you ponder about his particular diction.

“It was good talking to you”? Had Midorima ever said that to anyone before? You sigh to yourself and pinch your nose bridge to chastise yourself. Takao was right; you might’ve fallen a little too hard for the reserved individual, but even still, a relationship isn’t something you wanted to actively chase after.

Amidst your dilemma, you were completely unaware that Takao watched the entire exchange, holding back his laughter from seeing you uncharacteristically look like an absolute love-stricken fool. He got too much of a kick out of seeing the both of you trying to flirt… and an even bigger kick when he saw Midorima turning around to briefly “discreetly” stare at you while you were having your inner monologue.

———

“Takao, I’m having none of your bullshit today.” Midorima simply scowls as he prepares to leave the main building to the gym. Takao merely tags along while taunting him in a sing-song voice.

“Come onnn,” Takao insists, slapping Midorima’s back a little too harshly. “You said it yourself didn’t you? Favorable outcomes come to those who prepare the most. Don’t lie, I know you’ve been planning to naturally bump into our (y/n)-chan in different scenarios. Like yesterday in the hall—”

“You knew?!” Midorima jumps out of his skin to shoot an accusatory look at him, but Takao merely struggles to hold back a snicker at his reaction.

“Shin-chan, how hard is it to say three specific little words to someone else?” Takao sends a frustrated look. “You’ve always gone the extra mile to prepare your lucky items, read the Oha Asa predictions, and do little rituals not just for yourself but also for (y/n)-chan too, yet you don’t want to do a simple thing like confessing?”

“A confession isn’t that simple,” he retorts. “It can alter my fate for potentially worse if I’m not prepared.”

“Jeez, only you can take this so seriously,” Takao sighs, which only earned him a withering look from Midorima’s end. “But then again, it’s nice that you see it as something serious… but when are you actually gonna do it?” His response was only silence, as if he didn’t really give much thought about it until it was brought up now.

“That’s none of your concern.”

“Oh come on, Shin-chan!”

“To be honest,” he says, stopping in place. “The horoscope says that Cancers would be rejected by signs like of (y/n)-san’s, much less be compatible. Predictions state that such relationships between the two would be troublesome.”

“Okay, Shin-chan,” Takao says, patting Midorima’s shoulder. “I know I constantly joke about this Oha Asa and this entire thing with (y/n)-chan, but”—he stops when he sees Midorima giving him another scathing look—“even if the horoscopes state it so, it’s like you said: favorable outcomes come to those who do the most. If you did everything you could, I see no reason to be scared. Plus, you have me to help you.”

“... It’s not that. Part of this is beyond what I can do to prepare. Whatever I do will not influence (y/n)-san’s answer, and that is something out of my control.”

“You know, you could just say that you’re nervous.”

“I am not.”

“Well, if you want me to be honest,” Takao says. “I think it’s because the two of you are so eerily similar that you find it hard to approach (y/n)-san. Like, when’s the last time you’ve met someone as serious and stiff as yo—I’m kidding, I’m kidding! Please don’t raise your fist at me!”

“That being said,” he continues, “Just talk to (y/n) like you’ve talked to everyone else. I mean you both always hit it off when you talk together in class.”

“I… suppose…”

“Trust me,” Takao grins, slightly elbowing Midorima’s ribs. “I’d like to think of myself as an accurate guy in ball-passing and in detecting social cues.”

———

You really tried to carry yourself normally.

You really did.

But a part of you is becoming hyper-aware of everything Midorima does, and being your normally collected self is suddenly becoming a lot more difficult. Studying at your own desk is nigh impossible with both Midorima’s words and Takao’s implications running through your mind. Even Midorima, who normally minds his own business, shoots you pensive looks here and there during class, and he approaches you during break after.

“... Your sign is at one of the lowest ranks in luck today… may that be the reason why you’re not being your usual self?” He studies as you pull yourself together.

“Erm… somewhere along the lines, yeah. Most likely woke up on the wrong side of the bed today,” you mumble, rubbing your neck to ease the nervousness.

“Is that so…” he says. He pulls out a small toy that was found in the local gachapon down the street. “Ahem… I hear that your lucky item is this today.” He holds it out in front of you, silently waiting for you to take it, and you gently pluck it out of his large hands.

“Well, what about you?” you inquire. “I’m sure you got this toy for a reason, like say… for your own good luck?”

“Well,” he coughs. “I have my own. I am always prepared for such occurrences should things go awry.”

“You’re always so prepared for everything,” you quietly laugh. “Not that it’s a bad thing, though. I do wish I was more like you in that regard.”

“W-Well, I think you have your own admirable traits to be proud of, er…” Midorima slowly turns red and contemplates backtracking on his words. “I-If you excuse me, I must get going for health committee duties, nanodayo.” He heaves his bag on his shoulder as you wave at him, and he lingers there, debating on something that you aren’t sure what it is. “Might you have time afterschool today?”

“Uh… not that I think of,” you reply. “Are you already looking ahead to the next partner assignment?”

“Actually, no… it won’t take much of your time, (y/n)-san. It’s something quick. Can we meet at the vending machines near the gym? I do have practice around that time, so I hope somewhere nearby could suffice for you too.”

“That’s fine with me, because… I feel like I need to tell you something too or I won’t be able to study at this rate, but if you have practice, shouldn’t you be focused on that more?”

“It’s fine. This one takes… a higher priority.” Midorima fixes his glasses and readjusts his grip on his shoulder bag as he ponders about your own words. “If this arrangement is fine with you, I will be seeing you after school.” You only nod as you wave goodbye at him again, and you exhale a long sigh of relief and nervousness once he leaves. You really wonder if telling Midorima that you had something important to tell him was a good move on your part, considering that you can’t backtrack your words on someone as stubborn as him. Takao may or may not have seen Midorima’s attempt in being forward and silently laughed himself to oblivion in the corner of the classroom.

———

“Were you waiting long, Midorima-san?” You briskly jog with your heavy bag to the destined location to see Midorima thumbing through his book before he looks up.

“You are as punctual as always.” He closes his book with a thud and places it in his bag on the bench before he stands up to face you. “Which is always appreciated considering it is not as common in others.”

“I just think it’s common courtesy.”

“Not quite, considering I asked you rather suddenly to meet me here,” he says. “You aren’t obligated to even agree in meeting me, yet here you are on time, just like with our past project sessions.”

“Well… you did say it was important enough that you put practice as a second priority, and I do want to tell you something too.”

“R-Right…”

An awkward silence dominates the exchange after Midorima clears his throat and goes silent as you patiently wait in agony. You eye at his troubled expression, wondering what sort of thing he was going to tell you that got him so worked up. At the same time, you grew slightly antsier, quietly tapping a foot or rubbing your neck, and you wonder if Midorima was actually waiting for you to say something first.

“I… I think I’m in love with you, and that scares the crap out of me.”

“I-I believe I may have developed feelings akin to attraction for you.”

“Uh…”

“Ahem…”

Both of you stare at each other in unadulterated surprise.

“... You… like me?” Midorima murmurs, his eyes still full blown in shock.

“L-Likewise,” you reply, opting to stare at Midorima’s bag on the bench instead. Another awkward silence ensues as both of you take in each other’s sudden words and Midorima clears his throat again.

“... Why are you afraid of liking me?” Midorima restores his composure, staring at your flustered state with furrowed brows, thinking that he somehow made you uncomfortable at some point throughout the year.

“Wait… no! That’s not what I meant!” you say, mildly shaking your head. “Uh, let me rephrase that…” Midorima silently watches you as you continue. “Well, you weren’t the person to have romance in your mind, let alone have feelings, let alone for me, and… my friendship with you is something that I treasure, and I don’t want to hinder you with such things that can make you uncomfortable in being around me. That was why I was afraid, although I’ve been in denial about it until recently.”

“I see.”

“And um, I thought that confessing to you would end the friendship we had.”

“... Likewise.” Midorima uses your word against you with an upward curl of his lip. It almost seems like he was teasing you. You grow redder at his response, but he continued. “I suppose the lucky item I gave you provided the most favorable outcome for the day.” You only nod as you processed everything that just happened in a few moments, and both of you went quiet again.

“...”

“...”

“So…”

“... I’m not sure what to do next,” Midorima frowns. “I wasn’t prepared for this particular situation, nanodayo.” You only smile at his own flusters.

“Well…” you say. “We could date, but I don’t think that’s important right now, considering that we still have to focus on school… I mean unless you want to, then we can try to make it work?”

“Ahem, while I do think these things are quite frivolous,” he says. “I suppose we can learn to balance our relationship with other aspects of our lives accordingly.”

“I would like that,” you smile, walking to approach closer to Midorima. “Could we… um, hold hands? If you’re not into that though, that’s okay.” He says nothing in response but his hand slowly reaches out for your own to gently clasp, and closes his eyes in bliss before he opens them to look at you.

“... I must go to practice soon. It’s almost time.”

“I see,” you mumble. “If that’s the case, I’ll be inside the library to cram in extra lectures.” You pull your hand away to separate, but he holds you tighter. “Midorima?”

“... I’ll walk you there, nanodayo.” He peers over your face to gauge any objections on your end, but when he finds none, he gently tugs you along as you both walk to the building next-door.

“I never knew you were into hand-holding.”

“N-Not really,” he quietly says, his ears turning red.

“Actually,” you say, bringing Midorima’s attention back to you in light of the topic change. “I need to thank Takao tomorrow… he’s the one who pushed me to confess.”

“Hmph,” he scoffs. “I do suppose that the idiot has some merits to his words.”

“I do now see what he means when he keeps insisting that we’re too alike in personality and preferences.”

“That just means we’re more compatible than what fate initially predicted, nanodayo.”

“You checked the horoscopes for relationship compatibility? Never would I have thought that such things occupied your mind, Midorima…”

“Urk—That’s…”

[crossdressingdeath]

i think, while cql obviously had no choice but to censor mdzs, they didn't have to make it impossible to read their relationship as romantic through subtext either,

because wangxian's relationship in cql makes no sense. once minute they're soulmates, the next it seems like they're barely more than acquaintances. and then, of course, like i don't need to talk about that rain scene or separating at the end bc we all already know it was Bad and Stupid.

but this just makes it impossible to make any sense of their relationship, in either a romantic or platonic context. cql could have at least given us a cohesive deep soulmate """"friendship"""" and with the subtext that's already there, then as viewers we could at least understand the romantic relationship that was meant to be there, even if everything was censored.

but.... instead they gave us nothing?? there is no substance to cql wangxian at all, just stupid queerbaity-esque scenes that have no real meaning and go no where and don't even make sense in their relationship development.

like they tell us that tying the forehead ribbon to someone means marriage, and then wangxian did that, but afterwards they're still not even friends?? i mean they could have used that subtext at the end to imply actual marriage but instead it just feels like they throw in scenes like that all over the place without any thought at all for what it implies abt wangxian's relationship

i mean it just so obvious that they put no effort or thought into at least conveying something of the source material, like they're just so disrespectful to wangxian??? as if their relationship can be reduced to some nonsense subtext about chickens and bunnies and forehead ribbons and annoyingly drawn out gazes, just sprinkled in throughout the story with no thought whatsoever to even developing a believable friendship between wwx and lwj

and then people have the cheek to say cql wangxian is better and you know they're full of ---- because even just read as friendship... there's nothing to cql wangxian!!! you can't look into their relationship, analyse the interactions between them and what it means for their characters, because none of it makes sense!! no matter how you look at it, there's just no logical coherence to anything that happens in cql. because the writers just?? couldn't be bothered?

i genuinely feel so bad when i see people who are new to the fandom or people who just like cql trying to make sense of the story, and i think, just don't even try??

The thing with CQL is that they wanted to change it so that LWJ and WWX bonded before everything went to shit, which is fair, but then they failed to consider the knock-on effects that change would have. For example, it makes sense that book WWX doesn’t trust LWJ to have his best interests at heart; they aren’t friends. He respects LWJ a great deal and I think does have some romantic feelings towards him even during the Sunshot Campaign, but he has no reason to believe LWJ would prioritize WWX over righteousness and the rules of his sect. Nor does WWX have any reason to tell LWJ the truth about his core and demonic cultivation. Meanwhile in CQL they’re close friends and soulmates; why the fuck wouldn’t WWX trust the guy he says knows him better than anyone else?! Why would he assume that LWJ wanted to take him prisoner, why wouldn’t he tell LWJ about his cultivation? Why would he and everyone else assume LWJ hated him? “Oh, we’re best friends, but clearly he loathes me!” It doesn’t make sense! The writers literally just changed things and made zero attempt to make those changes make sense, this is called Terrible Adaptation Decisions 101. Also LWJ is so much less respectful of WWX’s wishes in CQL; think about how he pulls off WWX’s mask while he’s unconscious (I guess to double-check his identity? I don’t know) even though WWX clearly did not want to tell him who he was while novel LWJ kept the fact that he knew to himself until WWX returned to him of his own free will after they were separated so that he knew WWX wasn’t staying just because LWJ knew who he was. And of course there’s the whole thing where WWX very obviously wants to stay with LWJ and LWJ is basically like “lol you thought” and goes off to do a job he didn’t want, leaving WWX entirely alone in a world that still lowkey wants him dead.

[arthurtristankingsmen]

More and longer theory chatter with @flash-the-geist with guest stars who popped in. This one is longer since it’s theorizing but turned into something Flash affectionately named the ‘Esprestissimo AU’ which I am keeping because I love it so much.

Most of this mainly features Duet thoughts and then shenanigans ! The most I did was add a missing thing in my own comments for clarification or that my brain skipped over when typing it before, or where I adjust the order of the messages for cohesiveness

please enjoy jdjd

flaaaash — Today at 4:35 AM

hmmm what if the note-taker is Duet, taking notes about "Solo"? that implies they're two different people

Arthur — Today at 4:36 AM

that's what i was thinking-- that the ‘He’ in the note is reverb, and this note is in reference to reverb, but also a comment on Solo, and the Duet 'wrote' this character profile as like-- a case file if they're in charge of the organization

so duet is like 'solo' claims she still needs to study him for research in a note on the file he's taking on reverb or something like that

flaaaash — Today at 4:37 AM

this might be my deep, unfortunate familiarity with bureaucracy talking, but- if the person in charge is also the one taking notes, it's a very small organization

Arthur — Today at 4:37 AM

oh yeah

i imagined it was tiny personally

tempo seems on the smaller side so if it's all based there, i was imagining it was relatively small

flaaaash — Today at 4:38 AM

not international then, perhaps

adkjfakjf oooh now I want to make a little card for Flash

Arthur — Today at 4:39 AM

yeah no-- at least since the name tempo of the town following the motif like seemingly implies it's based in/related to the town since if follows the reference style

or that's my thinking anyways?

flaaaash — Today at 4:39 AM

very true

imagine if Tempo is just Like That and the rest of the world is totally normal

Arthur — Today at 4:40 AM

i personally think vivi didn't grow up in tempo now more tho-- because i think if she did and there is an organization, they woulda gotten wind of her and she probably would've been recruited since she's smart and clearly into that kind of thing

and if she was in the org and knew what she was doing, i don't know if she would've gone to the cave if she was at all in the Know 

flaaaash — Today at 4:40 AM

or they would have tried to study Mystery?

Arthur — Today at 4:41 AM

that too!!

even if they brought her in just because of mystery i imagine they would've brought her in

flaaaash — Today at 4:41 AM

maybe that's what the "her research into "REDACTED" is referring to. Research into mystery?

it all does seem to come back to him

Arthur — Today at 4:42 AM

or maybe she's relatively new to tempo still, and duet gave her a job because they intended to bring her in at some point but hadn't yet

like there were steps to take and like-- the cave happened before things could get fully underway

i mean at my job i applied in like-- march, and i didn't get an interview until may, and then i didn't get any training until november, and then i didn't get brought in to learn the job until december. so it'd be easy to imagine that if there was a reason, bringing her in could be a slow process 

flaaaash — Today at 4:43 AM

that might also explain why there were all these "go back" signs in the cave

clearly someone with English language skills put the signage there

Arthur — Today at 4:43 AM

that too! it definitely felt like it was to warn off people and keep them from tresspassing

but the gang were kids and also ghost don't haunt the places that aren't super scary and dangerous! so of course they gotta go in!

flaaaash — Today at 4:45 AM

maybe they weren't expecting someone like Vivi at all

she was a wild card that popped up and threw a spanner in the works accidentally

Arthur — Today at 4:45 AM

yeah!

i can imagine her just coming in and completely bamboozling everyone

duet is like 'okay we'll get her in on this but we'll take some time to sort everything and judge where she's at skill wise since we have time and it's not like she can get into any danger with all our protective me--oh no'

flaaaash — Today at 4:48 AM

that calls Duet's motivation into question a lil bc - there's at least a significant amount of time between Lewis dying and them finding him again

since their search is reasonably extensive and Arthur's had time to heal up. So why didn't Duet do anything during this time?

Arthur — Today at 4:50 AM

hmmmm--- well we know it's been less than a year since the cave happened at least, and i think the way Ben talked about it  sounded like it was a relatively short time table of only a few months, so maybe they wanted to give them recovery time or they weren't sure how to broach it-- i'm not sure. maybe the comic will give some kind of insight hopefully if the case is that vivi came in like that

i feel like it'd be interesting and make more sense given what she has available magic wise and mystery-wise if she wasn't in town until much later in life to explain why she wouldn’t already be working with the organization. but i'm still like hmm

because you do have a point that there would be a fair bit of inaction, unless for some reason vivi's memory issues or something was a problem or something happens in the prequel to explain or hint

tho now that brings into question if duet knows Lewis is dead, how are things not being managed better

i mean i've had arthur say in the past and i've said once or twice that like-- i think arthur was already working with prosthetics. so he could've had an arm mostly built and just had to make a more functioning one so that could've been fast. so hopefully maybe the prequel comic is set a bit before and might explain duet helping or something in a way that could make sense of it?

especially given he did make galaham's wheels already and such. he might've already built one but needed to make a new one set up for him

flaaaash — Today at 4:54 AM

I'm fairly sure people would at least know he's missing

I guess it's possible that the 'memory magic' thing that makes Vivi forget - it could affect everyone except Arthur and Mystery?

Arthur — Today at 4:56 AM

that's possible--

we have only seen mystery and arthur in the world seeming to know what's going on, so we don't know who knows what. just that vivi doesn't know lewis

but maybe nobody else does either to some degree

flaaaash — Today at 4:56 AM

Arthur being possessed at the time, and Mystery being a magical being himself. We don't have any evidence that anyone else remembers Lewis, although he seems to still be in pictures

Arthur — Today at 4:57 AM

people did seem confused arthur was freaking out in the store in the comic and like

idk. if i knew he lost his best friend i'd be more sympathetic/not look at him like he was crazy. I’d assume something set him off but probably feel bad for him if i knew what happened in the last year?

because i would imagine mental health is in the toilet after going on a trip and losing a friend even if he was only 'missing'

and the way arthur mentioned lewis and when vivi forgets he's just like 'nevermind'. if no one really remembers Lewis, then maybe giving up trying to explain is because he’s used to no one knowing who he means

flaaaash — Today at 4:58 AM

yea h

Arthur — Today at 4:58 AM

what if arthur only remembers lewis? (and mystery does)

Don't forget to take your meds ❤ — Today at 4:58 AM

In fairness most people would be confused if they saw someone having a panic attack in public, no matter how much was known about the person

flaaaash — Today at 4:58 AM

also if Lewis looked like himself for a moment just before dropping Arthur - does that mean Lance saw him?

or did he only see skele-version and thus didn't recognize him as Lewis

Arthur — Today at 4:58 AM

hmmmmm--- i lean to skele vision. he turned back pretty quick iirc

flaaaash — Today at 4:59 AM

I'm torn between analysing between a storyteller perspective and an in-world perspective

Arthur — Today at 5:01 AM

por que no los dos?

also

hmmm-- i think given people were like 'what's up with that guy', it seemed either not knowing what was going on with him or what it could stem from, but if lewis disappeared in a small town i feel like a lot of the details would've spread. so they might assume it had to do with that instead-- so it feels like maybe most people don't know

which seems strange in a smaller community because stuff gets around

flaaaash — Today at 5:01 AM

especially since the Peppers own a restaurant

Arthur — Today at 5:01 AM

yeah-- in a small town place a restuarant is usually a social hub of sorts

so if lewis disppeared i'm sure people would talk given he was a waiter and thus kind of a face for the restaurant

flaaaash — Today at 5:02 AM

also if they think he's missing and not dead, his family would be looking for him too. which means missing persons pics and all that

Arthur — Today at 5:02 AM

yeah and we didn’t see any. and some people not knowing or visitors i could get, but everyone seemed surprised by arthur freaking out, and if they knew lewis was missing and lewis and arthur were friends, it feels odd to like-- none of them to even look sympathetic

i would imagine if they knew lewis was gone they'd assume arthur would be more emotionally reactive than usual-- unless they have no idea that something is going on with arthur because you know-- lewis is erased jdjd

i mean the reason we know vivi doesn't remember is because her eyes glowed as lewis got phased out of the photo

but who knows maybe him being phased out was in general and that just meant she was affected too. everyone gets amnesia

flaaaash — Today at 5:03 AM

also slightly cracky theory but - if they ended up accidentally in the research facility during Ghost, that would explain why Vivi found a fully-stocked fridge alkja;gl

Arthur — Today at 5:04 AM

DSJDDLJSDLFJDSJL

that would be hilarious

lewis is his own scp in his tantrum mansion

they just keep an eye on the lot

flaaaash — Today at 5:05 AM

well what else are they gonna do with him??? xD

Arthur — Today at 5:05 AM

dslsdjdsfljdsfd

''welp no one knows who this guy is soooooo manor in the middle of nowhere time'

flaaaash — Today at 5:06 AM

"so the waiter turned into a vengeful spirit?" "oh uhhhh ok put him in a box i guess until we figure something out?"

ok theory- Duet knows Lewis is dead, but is trying to figure out a way to help/break the memory magic on Vivi, and that's why he's in the mansion/cave for a while before Ghost?

Arthur — Today at 5:06 AM

i like it! i think them knowing and approaching arthur in the comic and using 'rancid vibes' as an excuse would make sense

flaaaash — Today at 5:07 AM

"so that Vivi person wandered in again somehow and now the vengeful waiter ghost is loose?" "for fuck's sake you had ONE JOB-"

Arthur — Today at 5:07 AM

they know what's actually going on but they kinda act like everyone else while also getting arthur something that might help him in that book that i think will be important in the plot of the prequel

DL;G;HDGSAL;HKGSDHL;DGS

flash you have the biggest brain

 flaaaash — Today at 5:08 AM

,kadjgalgkj

"also there was this killer tree-" "I do not care about the tree, one problem at a time"

Poor Duet is having A Week

but the mental image of them trying to avoid Arthur and Vivi investigating, while trying to find ??? and re-capture him while shoving Lewis in a box is hilarious, and then they run into Shiromori and just throw their hands in the air like "can u not????". And then Murder Mystery shows up and they just quit

Arthur — Today at 5:10 AM

dlaajldkljjdl;dldjlfkfd

duet is just like

on their tenth cup of coffee

Don't forget to take your meds ❤ — Today at 5:10 AM

Arthur: Those are rookie numbers

Arthur — Today at 5:11 AM

they see murder mystery and go back inside the shop like 'can you add like 5 espresso shots to this'

flaaaash — Today at 5:11 AM

explains why they're like "Arthur pls your vibes. Do you KNOW what I've been dealing with"

Arthur — Today at 5:11 AM

asdl;;dfslhsdahg;as;dghkghsdllhsgd

flaaaash — Today at 5:11 AM

"five extra shots and a red bull chaser please-"

Arthur — Today at 5:12 AM

(also just still crosses my fingers for medium/spiritually-sensitive!arthur to be canon but if not it will live on in my fannon)

dsldjllssfdf

they just start shoving coffee grounds directly into their mouth

flaaaash — Today at 5:12 AM

this series has a lot of antagonists

akjdalgj just crunching beans down whole

Arthur — Today at 5:13 AM

i need-- to draw duet

looking tired with a coffee

flaaaash — Today at 5:14 AM

Duet with a giant cup of coffee, staring at Murder Mystery with a deadpan stare and going "Absolutely not, I forbid it, there is not enough coffee in the WORLD."

Arthur — Today at 5:14 AM

flash and will if i share this chatter on tumblr would you be okay with it ? or would u rather i block out names if i do

i feel like some of this is hilarious and people need to experience it

flaaaash — Today at 5:14 AM

akdflaf no go for it

I will out myself as a sham of a storyboarder

Arthur — Today at 5:15 AM

duet is that gif of the ghost busters lady going 'mmm nope not today, room full of nightmares'

and turning and walking away

duet is doing their best and needs a nap

tired as Arthur

flaaaash — Today at 5:15 AM

Duet walking around the corner to see the gang facing down Murder Mystery: swivels on one foot and goes right back the way they came

Arthur — Today at 5:15 AM

ldjldljd EXACTLY

Don't forget to take your meds ❤ — Today at 5:16 AM

Heheheheh

Arthur — Today at 5:16 AM

like look at this person

look at their eyebags

they are Tired

they have deal with this bullshittery

they have sass to provide

but they also are Tired and done with this shit

flaaaash — Today at 5:16 AM

I want Duet and Arthur playing a game of caffeine chicken

Marshy — Today at 5:16 AM

Huge massive sigh as they see the whole bullshit situation go down and turns around to go back to the bookshop

flaaaash — Today at 5:16 AM

just lined up at the cafe bar, espresso shots in rows down the counter as they lock eyes-

who shall win- the CAFFEINE-OFF?

Arthur — Today at 5:17 AM

flash

pls if you right that i will pay you money

or maybe art

Marshy — Today at 5:17 AM

It's me I'll win

flaaaash — Today at 5:17 AM

SLFKJLKGS

Arthur — Today at 5:17 AM

dlasd;sdgkd;djslj;dags

i'm rooting for you take those nerds OUT

flaaaash — Today at 5:18 AM

"Duet gives him a look of Supreme Weariness and Nopery. Arthur counters with a double eye-roll of Resignation and Angst. In the true synchronicity of the Absolutely Done, they each take an espresso shot and slam it down."

Arthur — Today at 5:20 AM

djdasd;ds;lsda;ldj;lkdsl;jkdsj;lkasljkdjlkdg

they clink the little cups together first before taking their respective shots

flaaaash — Today at 5:21 AM

they do the thing where they turn it upside down to prove it's empty

by the fifth they're trying to outcompete each other with anecdotes

by the tenth they've moved onto toasting each other

Arthur — Today at 5:21 AM

Bonding!

Don't forget to take your meds ❤ — Today at 5:22 AM

The anecdotes get concerningly similar to each others

flaaaash — Today at 5:22 AM

by the twelfth, Arthur begins weeping. Duet pats him in solidarity and knocks the next shot clean off the counter due to caffeine-induced twitching

Arthur — Today at 5:22 AM

DSGLAHGLDGHDGHAAHDSGDG

EXCELLENT

i

want them to be friends now

flaaaash — Today at 5:23 AM

by the thirteenth, the barista stages an intervention and starts giving them decaf

by this point, they don't notice 

Arthur — Today at 5:23 AM

asdlaadjsdsajd

thank you they owe you their life

they could taste the difference if they weren't vibrating into the 28the dimension atm

flaaaash — Today at 5:24 AM

after the fifteenth shot, the counter is clear and they're both full of sympathetic outrage for the other's plight. They sprint from the cafe, steamroll right over Shiromori, and punt the colours right out of Murder Mystery in a fit of industrial-strength caffeinated indignance.

Don't forget to take your meds ❤ — Today at 5:24 AM

Hahahaha

Arthur — Today at 5:25 AM

h;lsadlf;dsldj;fsljl;dfsajdfsa

flaaaash — Today at 5:25 AM

The newly Monochromatic Mystery has to then help Vivi contain the pair before they wipe all paranormal activity off the face of Tempo.

Arthur — Today at 5:25 AM

that's how the fifth video ends

flaaaash — Today at 5:25 AM

Lewis narrowly escapes by hiding in a box. THE END

Arthur — Today at 5:25 AM

dsal;gsdhldgsa;dgsdgs;hldgs;lhdsa

beautiful thank u flash

i owe you my life

flaaaash — Today at 5:25 AM

you're welcome it's my magnum opus

Arthur — Today at 5:26 AM

A+ story telling

i'm including it in the post

flaaaash — Today at 5:26 AM

ALKJGAGK

it's okay I don't have a reputation to ruin xD

Arthur — Today at 5:26 AM

dlasdl;dhsgldgdgs

this is a callout for flash being the funniest person alive--

or undead

flaaaash — Today at 5:27 AM

dead-

sfkjga

l

Arthur — Today at 5:27 AM

djdjdjdj

i thought about it and corrected myself xDD

flaaaash — Today at 5:30 AM

ok I have no idea if anyone will get this pun, but I dub this the Esprestissimo AU

Arthur — Today at 5:36 AM

djalsd;ldsjdsjldf

i LOVE THAT

music puns but espressos EXTRA ESPRESSOLY

flaaaash — Today at 5:49 AM

xD

[frangipansi]

Hi! If your inbox is open, I'd like to request a scenario with all (or any) of the demon brothers, + undatables reacting to a blind MC? Like, none of them expected to have a blind human and Devildom and they have to revamp everything to make it as safe for MC as possible. Can be she/her or they/them pronouns for MC. Bonus points if MC is extremely talkative and won't shut up lmao. Thank you!

OKAY! So, finally got this one out. I’m sooo sorry for the wait, but I wanted to try and do this right, not just some Daredevil nonsense, but I didn’t want to make the mistake of a ‘helpless blind MC’ either; because they’re not helpless.

I am also lucky enough to have a regular customer at my work that happens to be blind and she has been very happy to give me a helping hand to make this ask more real. She’s such a delight and her guide dog is beautiful and I could ramble on with our interactions, like one time she scolded us for moving the fixtures because she had just memorized the layout of the store then told her guide “you’ll earn that pay check today!”

SO! With her in mind, more so from her younger days that she reminisced with me; I have decided to work this piece around this customer’s condition specifically so I’m not just pulling shit out my arse.

To give you an idea, this MC suffers from Retinitis pigmentosa; their symptoms being tunnel vision and night blindness. So while they are legally blind, they can somewhat see. They use a cane when going out, use their hands and/or cane when inside a place knew to them – that happens to be in poor light (Devildom) – until they have the layout in their mind and move more confidently.

~

This also took a while because I couldn’t get a fic/scenario to work cohesively and hc was just not working either! But I’ve hopefully gotten it now, and I do hope you like it. I’ve also placed this under the cut because I’ve waffled on here.

Diavolo:

Interested. Anyone within the Devildom without eyesight, are generally the souls of the damned who aren’t permitted to move freely. Heck, he’s removed some of their eyes himself.

He wants to know instantly if there is anything he needs to change and improve to make sure MC’s stay is not only comfortable but enjoyable.

Absolutely loves how open MC is. He’s amazed at the resilience of humans; delighted to hear MC say how capable they are, though he does insist on one of the brother’s remaining her escort for the duration of their stay. Capable or not, he is well aware of how demons would use MC’s lack of sight to their advantage.

Really wants to ask how amplified their other senses are; disappointed to know most things depicted in movies are – for the most part – an over exaggeration.

Organises a tablet for them with all RAD textbooks uploaded so they have that ability to zoom in so they are able to read the text at their own comfort. Other systems such as braille, text to talk etc are also implemented if that is something MC prefers to learn by.

Lucifer:

Considers Cerberus as a guide dog? Impossible, the human would be eaten alive. Perhaps another smaller hellhound? Goodness no, they’d still be eaten.

Asks MC about their condition –on behalf of Lord Diavolo of course – so he is aware of anything that may help their stay in the Devildom.

Very pleased to see how receptive MC is, very talkative and informative about her condition; he’s surprised to learn the varying levels of visual impairment. Consults Diavolo on brighter lighting to improve her movements around RAD and already planning on improvements within his own home.

During MC’s first few nights in Lamentation, Lucifer appears on edge; always keeping an eye when they’re moving about on their own. Enjoys watching how they learn to memorize layouts, quietly telling themselves how many steps it takes from one room to another, touching hallway objects.

Ready to run to their side that one time MC walked into the wall; turning into the kitchen a little too soon; until he hear them chuckle to themselves and ran their hand along the wall until they found the doorway and walked through it. No damage done. He’s learning to leave them be, understanding that he doesn’t need to dote on them.

Mammon:

MC is blind? Ooh yeah! The things that boy could swipe to make some quick Grimm, and right under their nose. It was gonna be too easy!! Completely stunned when they still catch him out. “How’d ya know it was me?!”

Watches them narrow their eyes as if trying to spot him before coming up beside him and close the drawer he was just rummaging through. The nerve this human has to threaten The Great Mammon by saying they’ll use their cane to whack him.

Surprised at MC’s explanation on how they knew it was him. They recognised his scent; not only did he have his favourite cologne – which he didn’t think he wore that much of – they noted how he had a metallic smell, like the kind you get when touching coin constantly.

Likes to watch MC move around their room; at first using their hand to remember the layout and then moving as if they saw as well as he did. Considered rearranging things to see what would happen.

Okay, so MC isn’t helpless… but, other demons don’t know that. Considers using MC as bait; distract idiots so he can rob them and sell their things for a little Grimm. “I, The Mammon, am a genius!” “No, Mammon.”

Levi:

Couldn’t even imagine being in their position; all that manga he couldn’t read, anime they couldn’t watch… never knowing what Ruri-Chan looks like!!! Gasp! No way. Poor MC!

Really confused when he sees them one day, curled up on a chair in the common room, wearing a pair of glasses and a book in hand. Wanders over and looks over their shoulder before questioning what was going on; nodding when they told him that with reading glasses and preferably larger font, they could indulge in many a storybook.

As their relationship blossoms, he has a dedicated reading nook in his room for the two of them, including a lamp to brighten the area to help improve what sight they have. Likes that they’re happy to listen to him read to them his TSL series. He thinks about writing to the publishers for the next editions to have larger fonts; that way he could buy MC a set of their own.

He likes to sit and watch them bring things close to their face to inspect them better; his figurines which they – to his relief – handle with great care, or his manga comics to see which characters he’s fawning over.

He secretly loves that MC likes to chill by his fish tank wall. Why? They state that while there’s too much distortion for them to actually make anything out, they enjoy the ambient colouring and light; the two eventually just listen to music together like that as a means to relax.

Satan:

Of course he is utterly curious about MC’s condition and is glad to see how open they are to talking about it. He’ll look things up himself in his own time but nothing like hearing it from someone’s own experience.

Asks if those romance and crime novels are accurate; “so, do you touch people’s faces so you know what they look like?” finds it interesting that for the most part, this doesn’t happen; but it makes sense, he wouldn’t be too thrilled by someone he barely knows putting their hands onto him.

Writes down notes that he considers most important from the board during lessons and offers them to MC should they need them for their studies.

Another one who likes watching MC learn their way around Lamentation, like how they touch cupboard handles until they find the one they need while grumbling about how crappy the lights are.

Shared appreciation for just lying on the ground whenever a cat is near them, all responsibility out the window as number one priority is giving adorable little hellcats their undivided attention. Loves that MC is willing to con Lucifer into believing a cat makes a wonderful guide animal.

Asmo:

Oh poor MC, unable to see just how beautiful he is… Oh, they can kinda see? If he gets real close? Oh he can definitely do that! Bummed that MC promptly puts in some boundaries but once their relationship develops they do enjoy the closeness with him.

Learns – albeit slowly – that his looks aren’t going to win MC over, and instead begins to better understand the value of personality and getting to know a person. Should MC like Asmo, it’s because of who he is and not for all the fluffing he does with his looks.

Whenever he happens to be the brother escorting MC, just know he’ll always detour to the main hub; treating the two of them to manicures and pedicures, facials, all that fun stuff.

When shopping, he loves how MC feels the fabric of things he grabs for them and has an even bigger appreciation for how things feel on him. Absolutely enjoys offering explanations whenever MC would ask about colour or cuts if they can’t make them out should the lighting be too poor for them.

Will starting looking around for ‘fashionable’ canes. Yes, he knows it’s about practicality and he’s not going to take that away from MC, but what’s wrong with wanting to match their cane with that gorgeous outfit he’s picked out from them?

Beel:

Having no experience with a visually impaired human, he’ll ask MC if he should carry them places; it’s no big deal, they looked pretty light after all. Apologises if they happen to get a bit defensive so keeps close while they walk together, worried they may walk into or trip over something.

He’ll be curious about whether or not other senses are heightened due to the loss of another and is lowkey disappointed that they wouldn’t be able to hear someone in the kitchen stealing his food when they’re somewhere else in the house.

He loves cooking with them; the tastes of what he creates seem to be more balanced and they’re more than happy to sneak him a few snacks while Lucifer is occupied elsewhere. They’ll fool around, tasting things to see who can pick up more notes.

Things turn into a game between the two of them; if he spots MC in a room he’ll sneak up and try and get to them before they realise he’s there. “Too heavy on your feet,” or “you were giggling,” is something he hears a lot when trying.

Though MC can’t really see while he’s training or playing a game, he really appreciates that there still there to cheer him on; he’s taken to wearing a bright headband in hopes that they’ll be able to spot him out a bit better. They don’t half the heart to tell him they still can’t find him.

Belphie:

In the beginning, he’ll use MC’s lack of sight to their advantage; sly and manipulative to lure them in. Watches how they react to his voice, how their eyes or head move in the direction he’s in, learning how they work their other senses.

Tensions between the two would be tight after that moment and he’ll feel tremendous guilt for what he did to them; keeps himself at a distance, afraid they’ll recoil if they sense he’s too close and understands if they would.

Amazed that they find it in them to forgive him and help mend bonds between him and his brothers, and will spend whatever time he’s able building up trust with MC; whether that’s being their escort around Devildom or just being there for company.

He loves – when trust is established – that MC is just happy to lay with him while he star gazes and talks about what he sees, trying to paint a picture for them while they huddle up together in a fluffy blanket, sharing his cow print pillow.

Simeon/Luke:

They’re angels; their job is to look over and protect humans. So they are already well aware of how capable MC would be – Simeon more so than Luke since he’s younger and more interested in Michael – but they will still offer their assistance should MC need it.

They’re also the sort to take notes down during class that MC may not be able to see on the board; but they’ll ask before assuming.

Simeon has taken to writing a little bigger if it’s something he’d like MC’s opinion on his work; the two forming a bond through fiction and history. The two can be found losing track of time and just talking about any given thing.

Luke enjoys cooking with MC; asking them what they think of the taste of something he creates and asks how he can make it better. He’d love to be able to wow Michael upon his return to the Celestial Realm and MC will always critique his work rather than sugarcoat like Simeon would or just outright scare him like demons would. With a little push from MC, he takes lessons from Barbatos.

Solomon:

Quite unphased; he’s dealt with various impairments before seeing as he is still human despite being a very powerful sorcerer. He doesn’t offer assistance but will give it should MC ask him for help.

He has many a spell in his books that could quite possibly cure or ease symptoms of various impairments and is very tempted to bring this information to MC; but decides on holding back until he can figure out how to approach the subject. He’ll ask them how they feel about their situation and go from there.

Would also offer heightening other senses should MC want them; even temporarily if they’re just a little curious. “Let’s see what’s so crash hot about being Daredevil!” “My thoughts exactly MC.”

[saipng]

re7 anon, im bad with horror in general so im progressing really slowly but i genuinely thought losing hands was a re8 thing and i felt quite bad for ethan when he lost his left hand like .. he got it back but also i wish he could keep his hands. also if you don't mind me asking, why is re8 a bad game? i dont know anything about this franchise i just jumped straight into the 7th game with 0 knowledge

man oh man how i WISH you hadn’t asked that, for both our sakes. cuz now it is 5 am the day after my birth and there is no way that i am not going to go into an overtly long rant that idk if anyone will care about. but hey, you brought this upon us, so.

without spoilers, why is re8 a bad, bad game?

well, you see. that is simply because it is not a game.

it is a part of a franchise.

listen. listen here. what the hell is that supposed to mean???

there are plenty of franchised games, right. just because a game is part of a franchise, or even a sequel to another game, obviously doesn’t make it automatically bad.

the reason re8 is bad, however, is because that’s all it’s meant to be. it is a sequel and a prequel to yet another sequel. it is not a game.

because, if you look at it from the point of view of a self contained game, it is bad.

the story is all over the place. absolutely nothing is answered or explained, and only more questions are created with the promise to be explored in future games. new characters are introduced only to be very obvious sequel baiting, and absolutely none of them are explored beyond the surfacest of surface levels.

moreover, the reason for things to happen simply isn’t there. the story is so bad, the characters in canon literally cannot explain it to you. the reason is ‘just cuz’. it feels like capcom threw all of their budget into rendering every follicle on dimitrescu’s tiddies as opposed to actually creating a cohesive narrative that doesn’t fall apart at the simplest probing.

see, the reason that re7 worked and re8 doesn’t was because re7 was a GAME. any person, even a person like you, who has never heard of anything resident evil before or even cared about the franchise, could jump in and enjoy their experience with it. the horror works, the story works, the characters work. the pacing is immaculate. i’m not saying it’s a perfect game obviously, but it WORKS and it is FUN. and, for those who DO know resident evil, you get the hints and implications and the lore and even a familiar face and eventually, the dlc. it was an AMAZING reboot to the franchise.

re8 though? re8 assumes you’ve played all of resident evil games before and you’ve enjoyed them immensely and you want more and you will play again and again and again.

im not saying that a game, especially a sequel, has to be completely free of references or call backs to previous games or work alone without any previous knowledge. i mean. that’s not how sequels work.

but in the end, they’re still supposed to make sense. a game is supposed to be that - a game. doesn’t matter if it’s the first or eighth or seventeenth.

re8 feels like a weird wobbly bridge that you got across before the other side is finished building. it is awkward. it feels incomplete, stitched together from different concepts and ideas. they brought back ethan winters only to have no idea what to do with him. they introduced the lords only to be short term hype generators. they shoehorned in chris redfield because he is chris redfield and it really doesn’t matter how much he doesn’t fit.

in my humble opinion, the game needs to be at least 5 hours longer for it to actually start making sense. at LEAST.

the characters, protagonists and antagonists alike, need to actually be explored, the pacing fixed, flimsy writing tied together, map expanded, puzzles actually added in. then, it would be a better game. i don’t know about good. but definitely better.

that being said, you may be thinking. why the HELL is everyone obsessed with this trainwreck????

well, because we’re all mentally ill, that’s why.

okay, serious answer - because the less the assholes give us, the more power it gives us to project and play around. they created these extremely fun concepts and didn’t bother developing them despite the enormous potential and that pissed us all off. well, me. it pissed me off.

and, as we all know, NOTHING motivates me more than spite at this point. so me and the other content creators basically ripped the lords and ethan and rose and all the others out of capcom’s undeserving hands and said ‘okay thanks ours now’.

because dammit, resident evil village could have been SUCH a good game. the idea of it is FUN and we all love it.

the execution? perfectly terrible.

and again, i’m not saying that you’ll hate it. i think you can, and should play it (or at least watch a playthrough). and moreover, i think you’ll enjoy it. i think you’ll have fun, still. i think you’ll like it a lot, as did many others.

none of that erases the fact that it is still very much a bad, bad game.

now, i could go more into how the horror elements greatly suffered because of capcom’s desperate need to rehash re4, or just how much of re4 they actually ripped off and shoved into this game; i could talk about how ethan winters (and mia, to an extent) is a terrible character in this game and reason he works in re7; i could talk at extent why the bakers were truly scary and the lords very much arent; i could even mention all the unnecessary mechanics and how much they truly contributed jack shit to the experience.

i could, but i’m not gonna. this is long enough as it is, and i hope it all made sense, at least somewhat. i tried to not include any spoilers (as much as was possible).

and i also really hope i didn’t dissuade you from giving re8 a try.

because, like i said, it’s still fun. capcom gave us steel beams and pieces of plastic and said ‘go wild’ and we built our own playground. it’s like that post that’s like ‘this amazing new restaurant everyone talks about and you finally go there and they serve white toast bread and everyone brought their own jam’. literally that.

but it can be so good, if that’s something that you can be into !!!

oh and. this is my own personal take on the game, of course. draw your own conclusions, yada yada. but if you’re bad with horror, you’ll find this game easier to digest for sure.

anyway. periodt.😩✌️

[rwbyvein]

Firen Lhain: Chapter 704: Shaken:  Part II / III

Blake's head appeared from overtop of the guardhouse atop the tower, looking upside down at Aurora. She was shocked when Aurora looked up at her, though smiled when she saw her smiling face. "You're really good at that."

"Anticipating your mistress' needs is quite important for a servant."

"You are a REALLY good servant." Blake said, her head still upside down.

"I am paid QUITE well for it." Aurora stated. "You seem to be more comfortable." Blake flipped off of the roof and stood in front of Aurora, who was seated at the comms station. Blake looked at her curiously. "You seem more at home."

"Maybe because it is a home." Blake said, and spun about, "Castle?"

"It's not just that," Aurora said to her, "you are more comfortable being a Faunus." Blake gave her a shocked look. "Was it Jaune?" Aurora asked. Blake paused for a moment before lightly nodding. "He has done wonderful things for me as well." Aurora stated, and stood, taking a couple of steps towards her until the two were but a few feet apart, looking into each other's eyes. Aurora then looked out over the parapets and down the mountain beyond. She walked over, and Blake stepped up beside her. The two made their way to the parapets, looking between two of the rocky hills. "Before my mistress hired me, I had been rebuked at every attempt at improving my lot in life. I had worked long and hard to develop my skills, but... was only hired by unsavoury sorts. I honestly don't know why I applied to be her assistant."

"Did you know?.."

"Of course not." Aurora stated, "her father spends a lot of money to make sure that information does not get out."

"Well," Blake said, "it's a good thing you did." She then jumped up to the top of a parapet, sitting like a cat. She looked at Aurora and nodded her head to the other parapet. Aurora simply looked at it, nervously, hesitantly. "I know you can climb." Blake said to her.

"It," Aurora voiced, "doesn't mean I'm okay with heights."

"You wanted to be a CEO and are afraid of a little tower?" Blake asked her.

Aurora slipped off her shoes, felt the parapet with her hands. Her fingera stuck to it, and then her toes, and she breathed in deep before climbing up. Slowly she ascended, until she reached the top, eight feet higher than when she started. She squatted down, ensuring all of her fingers and toes were stuck to the parapet.

"In Menagerie, we have the greatest taboo." Blake voiced.

"There is... one thing..." Aurora slowly voiced, "that all cultures consider taboo..."

"Acting like an animal." Blake said, and Aurora's head snapped over towards her. "We spend all of our lives trying to be Human, but... we're better than Humans." Aurora scowled at her. "I don't mean it in that way. We can do things they cannot. I don't mean that any one person is worth more than another. But, I have cat ears, so I can locate things better than Humans. I can climb and jump better than Humans, and I can see at night better than any Human. Why should we spend so much time focusing on being Human?"

"To guess?," Aurora asked, "to prove to ourselves that we're not just wild animals." She paused for a moment, and turned to Blake, "Do you know what separates people from animals?"

"Uh, tool use?" Blake asked.

"A good answer, but no." Aurora stated, "I watched a video of a crow using the principle of displacement to solve a puzzle."

"Opposable thumbs?" Blake asked.

"Monkeys and Beringels." Aurora stated.

"Aura!"

"Ruby and Yang have a dog, right?" Aurora asked, and Blake instantly, reflexively recoiled. She stood on her feet before Aurora continued, "Now, did he really get launched at high speed into a Paladin?"

"In a fire ball." Blake said, nervously nodding her head.

"Aura?" Aurora asked, and Blake's eyes grew wide with shock.

"Alright?," Blake asked her, "what do you think it is?"

"Cooperation between unrelated males." Aurora said, and Blake looked at her curiously. "No other species has that level of cooperation between them."

"Wolf packs?" Blake asked, thinking about Ruby.

"Families." Aurora said with glee. "No one else has kingdoms."

Blake thought for a moment, ants were all related, and their armies female. A lot of species had groups of females, typically related. Herds weren't cooperative, they just followed each other. She looked over at Aurora curiously.

"The kingdoms are what make us people." Aurora stated.

"But what about Menagerie?" Blake asked.

"Basically a kingdom. None of the kingdoms are really kingdoms anymore."

"We are like a republic," Blake voiced, "sort of. So as long as we maintain social cohesion?," Blake asked, "we'll still be people? That makes a weird kind of sense. Are you sure about this, though?"

"This is what I can gleam from Jaune," Aurora said to her, "who seems to have a vital definition of self. For him, being a Faunus isn't really a thing. Sure, we have traits different from Humans, but that doesn't change our value. Our differences are what define us, not divide us."

"Are you sure you're not into him?" Blake eagerly asked her, head rapidly moving towards her, "like, seriously into him?"

Aurora thought for a moment, "I have a lesbian boycrush on him."

Blake thought for a moment, "That," she voiced, "makes a lot more sense than it should. So, what were you up to?"

"Making contacts." Aurora stated.

"Of course." Blake added.

"I don't have the luxury of being on a honeymoon."

"Are you jealous?" Blake eagerly asked, her head once again lunging towards her.

Aurora smiled before replying, "Of course I am."

"Of course you are..." Blake voiced.

"But," Aurora continued, "don't mistake that as a complaint. I am more content than I have ever been in my life"

Blake just smiled and looked out over the rocky approach. Aurora smiled and joined her.

* * *

Jaune leaned back on the couch with eyes closed. Weiss was elegantly snuggled up beside him, eyes closed as well. Ruby and Yang walked up to them. Weiss opened her eyes, "Can we help you?"

"Ruby and me want to fight."

Jaune's eyes opened, "You mean spar."

"Yeah, that." Yang said, and a pregnant pause followed.

"Can?," Weiss asked, "we help you?"

"We need a place!" Ruby exclaimed.

Jaune's head turned around a few times, "Uh?' he asked.

"Like, flat." Yang said.

"That is a quandary." Weiss stated.

Jaune's eyes unfocused for a moment before refocusing, "Well, I guess we have to use the space we have."

"I guess that makes sense." Yang said, and turned to leave, Ruby eagerly turning to follow her.

"But," Jaune said, and they stopped and turned around. "Two conditions."

"Shoot." Yang stated.

"And they are?" Ruby added.

"One," Jaune said, "when knocked down, the fight stops until you recover."

"I guess that makes sense?" Yang asked.

"But?!" Ruby asked.

"Her fighting style..." Weiss stated.

"Involves ground fighting." Jaune finished, "But until you get comfortable fighting there, that's the rule."

"And if we don't follow the rule?" Yang asked.

"You will be spanked." Weiss quipped.

Both of the sisters just looked at them blankly. "You keep this up, Ice Queen, it might be your pretty little butt that gets whacked."

"I shall endeavour to keep it's integrity." Weiss stated, "Except, well, you know..."

Yang started snickering while Ruby's head and tail nervously moved about.

"And the second?" Weiss asked.

"Have someone to watch you," Jaune said, "to make sure you don't hurt each other."

"What?," Yang asked, "like Ren?"

"Yes." Jaune stated.

* * *

Aurora awkwardly, nervously climbed down the parapet until she was back on the roof.

* * *

Jaune sat on a rocky prominence, Weiss sitting elegantly beside him, looking down at RBY + NR below him. He looked around curiously. "Ilia?" he asked, and she appeared beside him, her skin returning to normal. "And I thought Contrary was bad at that." he voiced, "We're all here!" he shouted, "Alright, here are the rules!"

Nora stood up, augustly inflating her chest, "Says who?!"

"Your king on high!" Jaune bellowed.

"You're not so tall!" Nora shouted at him, which caused Yang to start snickering. "What?" Nora asked her.

"Perhaps because he quite literally is." Ren stated.

"Okay, yeah?," Nora asked, "but he's still sitting?"

"Still taller than you." Ruby said to her.

"A lot of people are taller than me." Nora replied, "I just don't let it bother me."

"The rules are for everyone's safety!" Jaune shouted. "Now, we don't have much of a training area, so we have to use what we have!"

Blake's eyes quickly looked around, Nora craning her neck. "Where is it?!" Nora asked.

"Everywhere!" Jaune stated, "That's the problem. We have a lot of space, it's just a bit uneven."

"And a high grade!" Weiss added.

"I don't know what makes you think it's so good?!" Nora asked.

"She means steep." Ren stated.

"It is kind of steep." Nora replied.

"This is the terrain we have!" Jaune continued, "Which, would teach us to fight better on uneven terrain! Anyways, rules! Rule 1, you need a referee!"

"For like points?," Nora asked, "because, like, I'm really bad at that!"

"No!" Jaune simply stated, "To make sure we don't get hurt. If the ref tells you to stop, you stop."

"That seems too easy?" Nora asked, "What's the catch?!"

"The what?" Jaune asked.

"She is waiting for the other shoe to drop!" Ren shouted with a bright smile.

"Stop when the other person gets knocked down!" Jaune shouted. "As long as we have enough aura to take the fall... and a bit of rolling down the hill, we'll be fine. Worst thing that's going to happen?," Jaune asked, "is I break my antlers, and I'm not going to get too worried about it. I just don't want to see anyone get hurt."

"Except him." Yang stated.

"Exactly." Jaune replied.

[thewayshedreamed]

This Time— Part 2

A Nessian Fan Fic

Fic Masterlist

Alright, here it is! All of your responses to my first post were so encouraging, so I thank all of you for that! I was so nervous to post anything that I’ve written, and y’all made me feel so welcomed. Anyway, here’s the continuation of my angsty Nessian fic, This Time. It’s a long one, but I wanted to give some insight into Nesta’s headspace while also setting the occasion for the next part! Hope y’all enjoy it.

If you missed part one, you can find it here.

———————————————————————————-

A dull throb in her temples caused Nesta to stir in the early hours of Sunday morning. She was vaguely aware that it was raining, thunder rolling in a steady rhythm. She turned onto her back and gritted her teeth at the intensifying pain in her head. It suddenly radiated from her temples, meeting in the middle of her forehead and behind her eyes. For the briefest of moments, she wondered about the luck she had (or didn’t have) to wake up feeling like this. No recent illness, no allergies, no alcohol the night before. She blinked into the darkness as she considered, willing her cognition to catch up to her conscious state. Her answer became apparent when her eyes felt gritty as she blinked, and upon rubbing them, she felt a faint tenderness over and around her lids.

Ah, that’s right. The crying.

The events of the previous night flooded her memory.

I’m so gone for you...

You should go...

We can’t be friends after this conversation.

You don’t mean that...

The maddeningly soft click of the door echoed in her mind repeatedly, emulating the rhythm of her heartbeat. She slammed her eyes shut and turned sharply onto her side to bury her face into the pillow.

So often, people talk about the all-consuming relief that comes with waking from a nightmare and realizing none of it was real. These are the stories told at dinner with family or friends, at lunch with co-workers, or at larger social gatherings. Account after account is shared of cheating spouses, car accidents, home invasions, etc., followed by an expression of overwhelming relief at realizing it was all a dream.

Almost never do people discuss the ugly alternative. The micro-interval of time immediately upon waking where one exists in blissful ignorance, followed by the sudden gut-punch of recollection. The ambush of emotions surrounding some life-altering event.

Nesta caught herself grasping for that tiny shred of time, just moments prior, where she was only navigating a headache.

She felt her pulse quicken and her body start to flush, both being clear indicators of her heightened anxiety. Her heart thundered in her chest, and she felt a slight tremble starting to run through her chest and stomach. She closed her eyes as tears threatened to pool yet again and focused on taking a few deep breaths. She lazily reached out, feeling around until she located another pillow across her too large bed. She clutched it tightly against her chest and abdomen, willing it to ground her somehow. Tucking it close to her body and keeping an iron grip, she started to count her breaths until she finally drifted back to sleep.

———-

She had to cancel lunch with Elain and Feyre that Sunday, having slept long enough that she didn’t have enough time to make herself presentable. After explaining that she was suffering from a crippling headache (with no mention of its origin), they sent their well wishes and told her to call if she needed absolutely anything.

Her mornings persisted in a similar manner for the rest of the week. Usually one to rise on her first alarm, she couldn’t find the motivation to do so no matter how hard she tried. She snoozed her alarm a half-dozen times, finally dragging herself out of bed to dress quickly, grab a protein bar, and fly out the door for work.

Work served as a decent distraction from current events. She stayed busy and engaged, allowing her to completely ignore her phone and avoid any personal questions. She knew her sisters would be worried after telling them she was ill, and it was a matter of time before news of her and Cassian’s fight permeated their group of friends. Her sisters would likely put two and two together. Busy bodies. Fiercely loyal, protective, and supportive, but busy bodies all the same.

Several evenings that week she had received several variations of “check in” texts from them, as well as a couple of their friends.

Elain:

”Hey, Nes! Hoping you’re feeling better. Just wanted to check in and see how you are!”

Feyre:

”Just checking in, sister! I hadn’t heard from you since we cancelled lunch, so I hope you’re doing okay! Love you!”

Mor:

”Hi, love! I haven’t seen you in DAYS. Far too long. Please tell me I’ll see you soon! And that you’re alive and well. <3”

Amren:

“Alright. Spill. What’s going on with you? You haven’t responded to anything I’ve sent you, and I’ve sent you some funny shit.”

Nesta drafted one text, copying and pasting it to each and every one of them. She didn’t have the emotional energy to answer the question at all, much less several times over.

“Hey! Thanks for checking on me. I’m sorry I’m just getting back to you! Things have just been crazy this week. I’ve been busy, but I’m fine! We’ll get together soon.”

She stared at the lie over and over again.

I’m fine...

I’m fine...

Although, deep down, she knew. If she were fine, she wouldn’t keep scrolling to a certain text thread. She wouldn’t be reading and re-reading their previous conversations, and she definitely wouldn’t be focused on the date and time stamp of the last received message from days ago.

———

Nesta had been conflicted about Saturday all week long. She had very specific plans: sleep as late as her body would possibly allow, have coffee on the back porch, catch up on her reading, take a long nap, stream as much nonsense television as she could handle, have a bottle of wine, go to sleep. She had been looking forward to the peaceful oblivion of deep sleep, yet she found herself dreading the passage of her free time. It had taken a couple of days to land on an acceptable itinerary, and she felt better with a certain course of action.

She awoke to her covers being abruptly pulled away and the pillow pulled off the top of her head. She groaned dramatically and turned over to identify the offender, fully prepared to sling insults their way for interrupting her sleep. Before she could formulate a cohesive thought, a deep, familiar voice interrupted her.

“Enough of this, Nes. Get up. We’re going to brunch,” the voice announced, his tone dry and neutral.

Nesta’s eyes shot open, falling on a pair of hazel eyes that dared her to be uncooperative.

“What the fuck, Az? How did you even get in here? And what if I were naked?!”

”Look, I pulled the short straw. You’ve barely spoken to anyone all week. When you did, your responses were short and contrived. Your friends and family are worried, and I got volunteered to enter the lion’s den as the only one who isn’t afraid of waking you up.”

”That doesn’t answer all my questions,” she muttered as she sat up and rubbed her eyes.

“I’ve driven you and your sisters home on enough drunken nights to know where your spare key is. And I saw the sleeve of your sweater before I pulled the covers off. Give me a little credit.” He turned away from her to walk out of her bedroom. As he crossed the threshold, he paused with his hand on the door jamb. He glanced over his left shoulder as he said, “You have 15 minutes. I’ll be in here waiting for you.”

Nesta really contemplated throwing a full-scale temper tantrum by throwing herself under the covers and refusing to get up. A deep rumble in her stomach ultimately made her decide against it, so she stood up and padded over to her closet. She selected her favorite pair of jeggings, silently thanking the Cauldron that she had worn them once already so that they were perfectly stretched. She grabbed a sports bra and a long-sleeved tunic, put on some casual sneakers, and walked over to her bathroom to finish getting ready.

She wasn’t one for much makeup anyway, so she opted to wash her face, moisturize, and apply a little mascara. She brushed her teeth, applied a generous layer of chapstick, and quickly French-braided her hair down the center of her back. She glanced down at her phone; 12 minutes. Suck on that, Azriel.

She walked out of her bedroom, down the hallway, and found Azriel perched on the arm of her sofa, scrolling through his phone. Sensing her approach, he locked his phone and stood.

“All ready?” He grabbed his keys from his front pocket.

“Sure. Whenever you are.” She looked around for her small purse and grabbed it off of the coffee table. “Wait... did you clean up in here?”

She knew there was something different when she walked in, but it had taken her a minute to realize what. Gone were the take out containers from her countertops and coffee table. All the various cups she had left all over her apartment were nowhere to be seen, and her blankets were folded neatly in a stack.

Azriel cleared his throat and looked around. “Not really. I noticed your trash can was full when I threw my gum away, and I thought it would be pointless to bring it out and not get everything.”

She bit her cheek to stop her smile at his sheepishness. He had always been a good friend to her, but she knew he preferred when it went under the radar. No one blushed faster or got more awkward than Azriel on the receiving end of appreciation or a compliment.

“Ah. I see. And I guess the blankets folded themselves, then. Or did you need to fold them to ‘get everything?’”

“Nes, you know I cleaned up in here, so can we go already?” He was already turning toward her door, flustered and mildly irritated with her teasing. She gripped his bicep to turn him around before he made it outside.

“I’m sorry, Az. You’re a wonderful friend, and I don’t deserve you. Let’s go have some brunch and forget it, ok?”

He gave her a sideways smile and playfully shoved her shoulder. “Fine. But next time, you’re walking.”

———-

The drive over to the small cafe was short, so the pair sat in comfortable silence on the way. Upon arriving, Azriel found a small table in the corner of the patio, instructed her to sit, and walked inside to place their order. When he returned, he was holding a mug of coffee for Nesta and a mug of earl grey tea for himself.

“The food should come out in about 10-15 minutes. I couldn’t remember how you take your coffee exactly, so I just brought you a ton of shit.” He wasn’t exaggerating. He placed a handful of different creamers and sweeteners in the center of the table.

Nesta gave a small chuckle at his gesture, noting that it felt good to laugh for the first time in days. She couldn’t help but feel grateful that it was Azriel who had pulled her out of bed this morning, if it had to be anyone. They were more alike than most would assume, and they had made very fast friends all those years ago. She loved the purity of their relationship, built on years of trust and mutual respect, but never crossing beyond anything other than platonic. Cassian had always joked about being “outnumbered” around the two of them, commenting on their likeness and how he managed to find kindred spirits as his best friends.

The thought of him elicited a slight pang in her stomach, and she quickly shoved it down. She was pulled from her thoughts by Azriel’s voice.

���So. You want to talk about what’s going on?”

”Gods, Azriel. I haven’t even gotten the caffeine in my system.”

He took a sip of his tea, only breaking eye contact to blow gently on the hot liquid. He regained eye contact as he set his mug back down.

“We haven’t heard anything genuine from you in a week. Forgive us for being a little worried. I’m assuming it has something to do with Cassian?”

As she suspected, hearing his name struck a nerve and caused a certain heaviness in her chest. She felt herself becoming defensive, and even though her logical mind knew it had nothing to do with Az, she was snapping at him before she realized it was happening.

“Why is everyone acting like I’m off the deep end?! Maybe I’ve just been busy for a week. Cauldron forbid if I take some time for my damn self. And why the fuck would you immediately jump to him? As if my life doesn’t exist beyond all of you? And beyond him?” She felt herself flush out of anger. Or embarrassment. Who the hell knew anymore?

Azriel seemed almost entirely unaffected by her verbal lashing. He took a couple of seconds, leaned forward with his forearms on the table, and clasped his hands in front of him. He looked at her intensely, and she knew she was not going to get anything sugarcoated in this conversation.

“Need I remind you that I know both of you like the back of my hand? I’m not shooting in the dark here. You’ve been essentially MIA for a week, and that timespan directly correlates with Cassian being an absolute terror to be around. The odds of that being a coincidence are incredibly low. So, Nes, I’ll ask you to please cut the shit.” He voice remained even and steady. There was no true malice in his words, just the bluntness that exists between two close friends. He picked up his mug, leaned back in his chair, and waited.

Nesta’s posture softened slightly as she rubbed the bridge of her nose with her thumb and middle finger. She let out a long breath and looked up to meet Azriel’s gaze again.

“Look, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that. And I should also realize by now that you notice fucking everything.”

He merely nodded, acknowledging her apology and prompting her to continue with one simple gesture. She blew out another breath, preparing herself to explain everything. In the meantime, their food arrived, so she waited until the waiter walked away before beginning her story. She told him everything, even the uncomfortable details. Cassian’s confession. Her reaction. His anger. Her anger. The devastation on his face. As much as she could remember of their interaction. And finally, the words she couldn’t stop replaying in her mind. This time, it’s on you.

He listened intently, only offering small nods or slight facial expressions during the more intense parts of their conversation. Once she was finished, he let out a long whistle and said, “Damn, Nesta. You’re officially the most savage of the Archerons.”

“I’m sorry... what?”

“I’m not saying that to be insulting. I just meant that you kind of handed him his ass there.”

Nesta started at him, urging him to elaborate before she felt inclined to jump down his throat again. He picked up on her prompting and continued.

“Well, to be fair, Cassian’s full of it. The fact that he thought he was going to be able to sleep with you and continue being friends is short-sighted at best. Can’t blame him for trying, but considering how long he’s been in love with you, he was setting himself up for failure there.”

Now, she was gawking at him. How was he being so nonchalant about this bombshell? How long had Cassian been in love with her? And why the hell had he waited until now to say a damn word about it?

”How long, Azriel?” Her voice was so quiet that she wasn’t sure that he’d even heard her.

It was his turn to look surprised. “Are you telling me you didn’t know? Anyone within a mile of the two of you could have seen it.”

She shook her head, realizing she didn’t think she could handle the direction of this conversation. “Never mind. Regardless, we had an agreement that our friendship was too important to risk on anything serious and that it was supposed to remain purely casual. It’s done now. It’s not like it matters.”

A few seconds passed before she glanced up at Azriel. His brow was furrowed, conflicted with what he was going to say next.

”What? Just tell me.”

“Don’t you think that’s kind of bullshit, Nes? I get that you both agreed on those terms, but I think it’s kind of fucked overall. You’re telling me that the potential of a relationship wasn’t worth the risk but casual sex was worth it? That doesn’t make sense.”

She breathed sharply out of her nose before she responded. “Had the agreement been honored, we could have enjoyed our time together, and we could have stopped once life events called for it. If one of us started dating someone... if one of us moved... things like that. It’s fairly straightforward.” She wasn’t trying to hide the bite behind her words, but he still didn’t seem offended. She tried not to find his level-headedness infuriating, but her patience was thinning by the second. To her surprise, his composure slipped a little.

”And how did you think that was going to play out? You both would shake hands, go your own ways, and continue to hang out with each other as before? You would have been totally fine with Cassian dating another woman? And do you really think Cassian would be a-okay with sitting in the front row at your wedding one day? Has it ever occurred to you that you two always dislike anyone that the other dates? No one ever loves Cassian the right way. No one ever makes Nesta happy enough. Why do you think that—“

”Alright, alright! I get it.“ She held her hands up in supplication. “The fact remains, though, that it’s over. It’s done. We screwed up, and it cost me my best friend. We’ll never be the same.” She felt her eyes brimming with tears.

She was vaguely aware of Azriel apologizing for his outburst and suggesting that they head back. She forced a nod, stood up from her chair, and walked to his car. Once inside and buckled, he turned to her.

”Hey. I really am sorry.”

”Don’t apologize. You were being honest with me, which is something I’ve always valued so much in you. Don’t go soft on me now.” She managed the smallest of smiles.

“Deal. But the same goes for you. Our mutual honesty has saved us a lot of trouble over the years. Makes our friendship easy.”

”You’re right. Why couldn’t it have been us to fall in love?” She huffed a laugh, making sure he knew her comment was in jest. She turned to look at him as he finished backing out of their parking spot.

Azriel hit his brakes a little harder than usual at her words. He chuckled, turning to look at her with a small smile. “What good would that do us? What would we do for fun? Brood?”

Nesta laughed, truly laughed, at the truth in his words. Azriel made a wonderful friend to her, but there would be very little personal growth within their hypothetical relationship. She smiled at him, squeezed his forearm briefly, and said, “Fair enough. I guess we wouldn’t push each other to grow all that much.”

He continued to drive, eyes straight ahead. He still wore signs of amusement on his face, but his tone turned a little more serious. “No. We wouldn’t. I think that’s why Cassian has always been a great balance for people like us. We get way too comfortable in the dark.”

”Mmm. People like Cassian, for sure. Maybe people like Elain, too?” She gave him a knowing smile.

He pulled up in the driveway and placed the car in park before looking at her. She could see the faint blush on his cheeks at the mention of her sister, but she wouldn’t push him. She knew he was smitten with Elain and had been for some time. She hadn’t spoken to him plainly about it, but she could tell by the way they interacted that they were a matter of time. Inevitable, even.

“We’re not talking about me today. Only you.”

She giggled at his deflection. “Thank you again for today. I needed the coffee, the waffles, the venting, and the swift kick in the ass.”

”Of course. Speaking of Ellie, what’s your plan for her birthday party next weekend? You know Cass will be there.”

“Oh, man. I think I blocked that out.” She opened the door, stepped out of the car, and peered down at him before adding, ”That, my friend, is something I will have to play by ear.”

——————————————————————————-

A/N: Sorry for no Nessian interaction this time, but I just love the idea of a Nesta x Azriel brotp. I couldn’t help myself. Nessian interaction to come, I promise!

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@polireader // @lord-douglas-the-third // @justgiu12 // @notyournymphetish // @sjm-things // @strangeenemy

[queenerdloser]

okay i finally (finally!) finished gr*duation after what felt like three hundred years and i have many thoughts that i just.. want to get down to process my own very VERY mixed feelings on this season

overall it was a fun romp at the end with some highly enjoyable goofs. i enjoy fitz maplecourt so much & relished griffin being able to do a character. the firbolg lives in my heart. argo is great. 

that said, the plot was, overall, messy as shit, considering at the end i still had very little clear idea of a) what exactly order/chaos wanted to achieve and b) why the fuck they were even doing what they were doing. we spent all that time on a hog heist that, in the end, had... very little to do with what was going on at the time. (would the narrative have been significantly changed without the hog heist? if, instead, hog hadn’t responded due to their internal greed/indifference - something that’s already been established in world and isn’t a stretch to imagine - and thus had the exact same ramifications and end result as the heist gave us? like don’t get me wrong, the heist has some of my favorite goofs in it, but it’s essentially like six episodes of nonsense that, in the end, has almost nothing to do with the main plot & whose end goal could have been summed up in the finale.) the whiplash of suddenly taking gray on as an ally to we’re heisting hog for reasons to actually the real threat was the demons at the castle attacking now for reasons is... bad plot. (look at how many times i have to say ‘reasons’ bc there’s no real in-universe or external force that explains why something is happening at that specific time.) 

i haven’t listened to the final ttazz about grad but it kind of felt like travis just gave up on his narrative arc and this sloppy plot mess is what we have left. like, okay order/chaos is a cool concept but what were they actually trying to achieve? why could order just be booted out of their shared body and why didn’t they just do that instead of having that whole climatic battle? why both using fitzroy at all for anything if they could always just take over the world with demons? why did we have all these characters allied together if in the end we were going to op the three pc and have them fight basically one-on-one with order? why did the commodore suddenly and inexplicably switch sides after working with the boys literally like three episodes ago other than to shoehorn in a conclusion to argo’s arc that, ultimately, fell short bc it was so utterly anti-climatic? 

and like!!! maybe some of these questions were answered but none of them to an extent that felt grounded enough in the narrative that they made sense, lingered, or didn’t feel like a macguffin to cover a sudden plot twist or plot hole. a lot of plot felt sacrificed for cool concepts and fun character twists and i get that, but when all you have is cool concepts and fun character twists, there’s no real foundation for it to rest on.

i AM going to compare to amnesty bc i do think amnesty is the strongest arc plot-wise of the three major seasons of taz. balance recovers in the back half but the first three parts are very loosely connected to the major plot and then there’s that huge info dump in crystal kingdom so like - it’s also messy there, even though it manages to make it work in a way that graduation doesn’t. but amnesty is tightly plotted from the beginning - there’s a clear trajectory, foreshadowing built in, characters have actual arcs that make sense, most of the major villains and antagonists have motivations that make sense and even the act three twist is something that’s reasonably built in from the beginning. even if it wasn’t ALL planned (such as billy the goat’s involvement) it’s clear that new elements were worked into an already existing framework with an eye towards cohesiveness. i know people complain about the main three not being “together” enough or “friendly” enough with each other (as if that’s all that matters in a good story lmao) but i also think that amnesty has the strongest character arcs of the three seasons because we do see all three major characters start in one place and end up somewhere radically different, make movements in cohesive and reasonable ways, and change in a way that is not off-the-wall or just for a fun twist. 

graduation... doesn’t really do that. the main three are a fun time but in the epilogue i was genuinely struggling to get why fitz decided to suddenly be a lawyer or why the firbolg, who has never shown any interest in having a name before that moment (quite the opposite, really) is suddenly emotional over having a name. argo, who has spent all of his time honoring his mother, decides to... run a cruise ship? and even leaving aside the epilogues, these characters... don’t really have an arc. argo is the closest and even his emotional narrative falls flat bc the commodore’s ending is so anti-climatic and bc, other than the trial scene, he and the commodore largely don’t interact. if the commodore had played a larger part in the actual narrative maybe it would have felt less like an aborted attempt at an arc but. he didn’t. fitz also has an attempt at an arc but it also falls flat bc so much of fitz has remained unchanged from when we first meet him. he’s a little more empathetic and better at magic, but how has fitz really changed since the first episode?

(tangent: thinking again about justin having to ask why the firbolg was doing what he was doing during that whole dog-is-the-headmaster reveal portion, to the point of asking travis point-blank why his character was doing the things he was doing. thinking again of how travis just told the boys point-blank that this side character they couldn’t even remember the name of was their best friend. and then again about how that “best friend” just like... fucking disappeared from the narrative after that, never to be seen or heard from again until the epilogue twenty episodes later for two brief seconds. in fact pretty much every character except rainier just disappears from the narrative at a certain point and i’m pretty sure it’s in reaction to the complaints about the numerous characters - but the answer to those complaints wasn’t to just mysteriously cut everyone else from the narrative without warning or reason laksfsafjlfj. what happened to that one villain posh guy from the first episodes???? what about the accounting owl teacher??????)

this is just my rambly processing of grad bc i’m trying to figure out what about it fell so dramatically flat for me that it was a literal slog to get through most of it even though i found the characters themselves delightful and enjoyed the mcelroy goofs as much as ever. and i think the thing is... for some listeners, the most important thing is going to be the interaction with the players or the goofs or how friendly and found family-ish the main group is with each other. which is great and fine! but for me, a good story or good character arcs or something well thought-out and plotted out is always going to be more engaging, no matter how much i like the found family or how much i like the goofs. it’s why i struggled to get why people complained so bitterly about amnesty - who cares if the main three are always together or getting along really well or being friends if they’re having interesting, satisfying character arcs and personal growth set in an interesting, dynamic plot? in graduation, that foundation is just missing and i’m sure part of it was due to the unnecessarily vitriolic backlash against travis (that’s enough to steal anyone’s thunder) but also just like... an underdeveloped plot in an overdeveloped world, a trap so many authors have fallen into. (like travis can describe in minute detail the inner workings of hog that are only applicable for about five episodes but chaos/order’s motivations are largely handwaved despite them being the central antagonists for the entire season.) 

anyway. once again, great goofs. i would die for fitzroy maplecourt. but i can’t imagine ever listening to the whole thing again or even more than a couple of episodes here or there (ironically of the hog heist, which, despite how unnecessary it was, was a fun romp and had some of my favorite moments. so, you know. sometimes unnecessary is still good lmao). 

[cicaklah]

It hurts me to say this...

But Star Trek Discovery season 3 is a fucking mess. It's a mess that I am seriously struggling to be enthusiastic about watching. Its not the setting, its not the acting, its not even the characters really, although it is, but its because the writing has taken a tumble off the deep end. No one writing this show has an idea what they are doing. And none of them seem to give a shit. Disco is struggling with something that was a problem in Picard too - there being too many characters and too many plot threads. This is something that was coming since the show decided not to have a conventional cast and have the command crew be non-main characters. However, it ends up with a severe epidemic of idiot ballitis.

The command structure of the Disco makes no sense, and it never has. But now it makes even less sense, and it gave up a great opportunity to fix it, to promote some people to main characters, to build an ensemble cast that didn’t feel disparate, to have that found family vibes. They did none of it. They did the same thing they do EVERY SEASON, which is introduce some new characters and bloat the cast further. There’s no time for characterisation, there’s no time for anything, we’ve got HUGE OVERWHELMING MYSTERIES TO SOLVE!!!

Some characters have lost their entire personality, thinking specifically of Stamets here, but also Tilly... and then who other than Michael and Saru are there who is an original character who got actual screentime and development? Georgiou’s gone now, Culber probably should have stayed dead lbr, and the whole bridge crew are attractive ascended extras. As usual, Disco does what it does badly, introducing YET MORE new characters to join the ranks of the underused (Book, who is baffled to be there other than to be sexy and handsome and have a good cat) or there to advance the plot at great expense (Adira, who is better than everyone despite being a literal child and its not being used to highlight how out of time the characters are. But we get so far, an A plot and 2 B plots detailing Adira's backstory, which boils down to 'Trills aren't supposed to be in human bodies whoops' aka, a plot TNG did far more efficiently 30 years ago. Oh and as of episode ten, just saying nothing) I quipped in my post about the first episode that the plot was going to be climate change until they forget about it, but I didn’t expect it to happen so quickly. Instead, the plot seems to be THE BURN but also THE MUSIC but also THE FEDERATION MIGHT BE EVIL and now THE MIRROR UNIVERSE, but not the plot thread that was dangled by David Cronenberg about how the Terran empire fell after Spock gave them feelings, but a two parter of (enjoyable) overacting in old costumes that takes another 2 episodes away from THE BURN/THE MUSIC/THE FEDERATION and sets up a spinoff series that will likely actually be far better than it should be, because Disco isn’t allowed to be the flagship show, it must be the seed tray for the other ideas everyone would rather spend time on.

There are so many other things I have HATED this season (Gabrielle becoming a Romulan murder nun oh god the fLAMES ON THE SIDE OF MY FACE) but really the main, overriding, all consuming problem I have is with Saru. It’s such a good setup! Finally the captain, but obviously unprepared, with a crew who aren't cohesive, are traumatised, and a computer that somehow has a personality. He throws a dinner that ends badly. He takes the advice of a sentient computer and scores a win. Even though control happened 5 minutes ago, he is fine with this. Even though he has always had problems with fear and then now the absence of it, he now absolutely has no qualms about any of this. They're stranded in the future and need to find Starfleet, but it takes about a week and then they do. The starfleet of the future is kinda mean and very overstretched, but they have the solution to their problems! Future Starfleet is breaking a thousand laws and they’re now a dirty secret...so they future up the disco, but don’t give them new uniforms or use them, or seize their dilithium for their ships, nah, they just....do nothing.  He appoints Burnham as his 2IC, who then immediately soft mutinies against him so he fires her. He then appoints a 23 year old ensign (Burnham's best friend, protege and literal roommate) as his 2IC. No one has a problem with this. LITERALLY NO ONE HAS A PROBLEM WITH THIS. Not Stamets. Not Burnham. Not Detmer. Not anyone. Including, somehow, the future starfleet admiral?? Was I the only one who watched the 5 or so TNG/DS9 episodes where they hammered home the 'Being a captain takes a lot of experience' peg, into the 'prodigies are bad' hole??? SEE: Red Squad, Valiant, Wesley fucking Crusher??? So you've got an unprepared rookie captain, who by his own original character arc never got the captain training he wanted. He got a year being 2IC to Lorca, then a year of being co-captain with Pike, during which he went through a significant trauma and he and Pike weren’t exactly sharing captaining tips by the fire. He's visibly, obviously struggling...apart from the show doesn't think so. The writing doesn't think so. Am I supposed to be having a sense of dread about this? Have they all been possessed by brain worms? The ones that are the cousins of the Trill in the beta canon novels perhaps??? (drink)

He’s now obsessed with some dead Kelpien scientist even though admiral underused says that as far as he knows Kelpia is fine and a member of the federation, but instead of having an episode where Saru gets them to jump there, he just does...other dodgy, stupid, bullshit that feels incoherent, feels wrong, but no one but me seems to care. The writers don’t. Just, when Lorca was our morally dubious captain, we were supposed to think there was something hinky because the other characters responded to him. Saru hated him. Stamets hated him. Culber hated him. Cornwall was aghast at him. We're ten episodes into this season and we're in the past in the mirror universe I assumed at the behest of a Q but is actually some TOS proto-Q bullshit and I am JUST VERY TIRED AND ANGRY THAT THIS IS ALL HAPPENING.

The first episode of this season was SO STRONG. There were some GREAT ideas. Since then, Disco has become what its critics have said it was and it breaks my fucking heart.