#non-evidence based practice

[tofixtheshadows]

I've been thinking a lot lately about how Kabru deprives himself.

Kabru as a character is intertwined with the idea that sometimes we have to sacrifice the needs of the few for the good of the many. He ultimately subverts this first by sabotaging the Canaries and then by letting Laios go, but in practice he's already been living a life of self-sacrifice.

Saving people, and learning the secrets of the dungeons to seal them, are what's important. Not his own comforts. Not his own desires. He forces them down until he doesn't know they're there, until one of them has to come spilling out during the confession in chapter 76.

Specifically, I think it's very significant, in a story about food and all that it entails, that Kabru is rarely shown eating. He's the deuteragonist of Dungeon Meshi, the cooking manga, but while meals are the anchoring points of Laios's journey, given loving focus, for Kabru, they're ... not.

I'm sure he eats during dungeon expeditions, in the routine way that adventurers must when they sit down to camp. But on the surface, you get the idea that Kabru spends most of his time doing his self-assigned dungeon-related tasks: meeting with people, studying them, putting together that evidence board, researching the dungeon, god knows what else. Feeding himself is secondary.

He's introduced during a meal, eating at a restaurant, just to set up the contrast between his party and Laios's. And it's the last normal meal we see him eating until the communal ending feast (if you consider Falin's dragon parts normal).

First, we get this:

Kabru's response here is such a non-answer, it strongly implies to me that he wasn't thinking about it until Rin brought it up. That he might not even be feeling the hunger signals that he logically knew he should.

They sit down to eat, but Kabru is never drawn reaching for food or eating it like the rest of his party. He only drinks.

It's possible this means nothing, that we can just assume he's putting food in his mouth off-panel, but again, this entire manga is about food. Cooking it, eating it, appreciating it, taking pleasure in it, grounding yourself in the necessary routine of it and affirming your right to live by consuming it. It's given such a huge focus.

We don't see him eat again until the harpy egg.

What a significant question for the protagonist to ask his foil in this story about eating! Aren't you hungry? Aren't you, Kabru?

He was revived only minutes ago after a violent encounter. And then he chokes down food that causes him further harm by triggering him, all because he's so determined to stay in Laios's good graces.

In his flashback, we see Milsiril trying to spoon-feed young Kabru cake that we know he doesn't like. He doesn't want to eat: he wants to be training.

Then with Mithrun, we see him eating the least-monstery monster food he can get his hands on, for the sake of survival- walking mushroom, barometz, an egg. The barometz is his first chance to make something like an a real meal, and he actually seems excited about it because he wants to replicate a lamb dish his mother used to make him!

...but he doesn't get to enjoy it like he wanted to.

Then, when all the Canaries are eating field rations ... Kabru still isn't shown eating. He's only shown giving food to Mithrun.

And of course the next time he eats is the bavarois, which for his sake is at least plant based ... but he still has to use a coping mechanism to get through it.

I don't think Kabru does this all on purpose. I think Kui does this all on purpose. Kabru's Post Traumatic Stress Disorder should be understood as informing his character just as much as Laios's autism informs his. It's another way that Kabru and Laios act as foils: where Laios takes pleasure in meals and approaches food with the excitement of discovery, Kabru's experiences with eating are tainted by his trauma. Laios indulges; Kabru denies himself. Laios is shown enjoying food, Kabru is shown struggling with it.

And I can very easily imagine a reason why Kabru might have a subconscious aversion towards eating.

Meals are the privilege of the living.

[helthcareproducts]

Balmorex: A Respite for Back & Joint Pain

[voidartisan]

you know i was thinking about it and since both the force and the inner workings of the human mind are arguably non-observable phenomena i think force-based academia should look a lot like psychology. current arguments and achievements of note include:

are the living and universal force actually different???

are the living and universal force actually connected at all???

those two factions of academics who hate each other's guts and theories and methodology (feat. pragmatists who figured out that the theories work together really effectively when practiced??? just saying)

FIGURING OUT WHY IT WORKS IS SECONDARY TO THE FACT THAT IT DOES WORK, JOCASTA

YOU CANNOT JUST DO THINGS WITH THIS METHOD WHEN YOU CAN'T ESTABLISH ITS SCIENTIFIC VALIDITY, YODA

that one researcher who accidentally won the space nobel prize in physics while trying to figure out how it is Physically Possible for the Jedi to do That One Thing

we have no empirical evidence that "the force" exists and therefore we can ONLY make conclusions based on observable events--- (loud angry yelling)

incredible amounts of popular misinformation and pseudoscience being distributed to the public still somehow

psychometric abilities: discrete or dimensional?

look. this experiment was completely unethical and we would never do anything like it today BUT---

this used to be true but then we told people about it and it changed as a result of that awareness. no we're not lying to you----

everything can be 100% traced back to a biomedical source

nothing can be 100% traced back to a biomedical source

force abilities are actually linked to overarching social factors like socioeconomic status of parents and--- *yelling from the back* OKAY BUT WHAT DO WE DO WITH THAT

look. listen. 60% applicability is golden in this field. you're a hard science researcher you wouldn't understand how hard it is to study an invisible energy field with a mind of its own

and, of course, the interdisciplinary argument staple

that isn't actually a real science :/

[brucewaynehater101]

About Tim's kill count: I think Tim tries really hard to be okay with murder. He's accepted that's something other vigilantes do, that sometimes it's the most practical answer. He knows that self defense is a thing, when it's you or them... Well, no one can be blamed for choosing themselves over a villain. He is the smart, logical Robin. He can be rational about murder. Stars know someone has to, and B is too much of an emotional mess when it comes to that particular subject.

So when Tim has to blow up Ra's bases, he tries really hard to be okay with it. He gave them a three minute warning (it's not much, but he knows how fast they are), so technically it's not like it's his fault if they decided to stay. He had to do it, it wasn't even just self defense, he had a civilian hostage to take into account. It was the only logical solution that allowed him to save Batman too. So yeah, he knows his reasoning was completely sound despite the circumstances. Honestly, he deserves Kudos for not losing it considering the amount of stress he was under and the fact he nearly died and lost an organ.

So yeah, he is pretty sure he's okay with it. He knows that if Batman ever truly catches up un his RR reports of that time he's not gonna be happy. He figures he can deal with that (he can't, he can barely deal with his own guilt. Deep down he knows he'll collapse like a wet napkin).

But instead of Batman the one to confront him is Jason having heard from Talia or finding the evidence on an outlaws' mission. And Tim is relieved because this should be easy. Not only is he a master manipulator: Jason is okay with murder, extremely emotional and still feels guilty about Titan's Tower. He's not even on talking terms with B. Tim has the upper hand in this encounter.

Cue to Jason's pov and it's just so painfully obviously that Tim is trying to rationalize the guilt away. Jason doesn't know whether to acknowledge it (the kid looks like he needs to actually talk about it, sue him) or to let him be delusional for a bit longer. He isn't the biggest expert on healthy but that doesn't look like it.

Tim succeeds in getting him to promise he won't tattle to Bruce, and is really proud of himself for handling the situation. Jason is now panicking thinking about what would Bruce do if he finds out (Tim doesn't know the extent of Batman's reaction to Jason killing at first).

(I got a little carried away with the idea of Tim being convinces he's okay with murder and Jason, who is pro murder for certain people, seeing right through him like "Oh honey")

Oh!!! I've seen some fics that cover what would happen if the Bats found out about Tim's kill count or the bases, but I haven't really seen ones with dark/abusive Bruce.

Tw: abuse, murder

Here's what I'm thinking:

Jason is fantastic for being the first to find out. He'd be supportive, understanding, and non-judgemental. He'll have no moral issues with murder. Perhaps he could have some mental breakdowns on the fact his younger brother had to resort to that or the high number of deaths or that someone younger than him had to stain their hands (which could also lead into him finally processing Damian's kills as well), but he wouldn't have any issues with Tim commiting murder.

Then we contrast that with Dick. He doesn't blame Tim. He's fiercely protective of his brother and will beat up anyone who gives Tim shit for it. On the other hand, he does have moral issues with murder. He'd probably have an internal debate with himself. He wants to support Tim, but the kid killed so many people (in this AU). Tim killed in self-defense. Dick has a particular understanding due to his time as a cop, but his vigilante rules have always contrasted with his cop ones (not just killing. Breaking laws, how civilians are treated, who your "allies" are, and whether you can trust your coworkers to do what's right). He's devastated that Tim was in that position and blames himself (maybe even takes those deaths upon his own moral conscience).

Both of them love, care, and support Tim in this. They also have very different ideas about murder.

Tim is also trying very hard to deny to himself how much death is actually on his hands. He's struggling to pretend he's fine and trying to logically convince himself that the deaths are acceptable.

In this AU, Bruce obviously flips the fuck out and acts like a piece of shit. Feel free to hc how far he takes that shit.

However, this has important ramifications against Damian. Whatever his feelings are about Tim at this point, watching his father abuse a kid he adopted (and considers his own) for the sin of killing? For self-defense? What if Damian ever kills again? Would Bruce react the same? What if there was no other choice? Also, does this mean that his father will never truly love him? Will his past always be held over Damian's head? Will Bruce ever forgive him? Is his father's love conditional? To add on, Damian has complicated feelings about LoA as well. He'd need to process the extreme destruction Tim enacted against the LoA. Just Damian having mental breakdowns.

Cass's confliction with murder and her love for Tim could also be added into this. I don't know much about the arc where she becomes a villain, but that would add to her turmoil.

Now, Alfred is a confusing one. How dedicated is he to Bruce? Is this the characterization where he sasses the man, not so subtly hides his guns around the Manor, and will stand up to the man? Or is this the one who will follow Bruce's lead even if it means psychologically torturing his grandkid? Is he somehow both at the same time? Can the kids trust Alfred to protect them or choose them over Bruce?

Babs would be protecting Tim (and the others in their support of Tim) to the best of her ability. In my mind, she's chill about murder due to her dad being a cop and her working with murderers (like Harley). She'd run interference to protect Tim until Bruce finds out, and then she'd be trying to get him away from Bruce.

Anyways, I'd love to see all of the characters, their feelings/experiences, and the conflict expanded on.

[amuyyi]

How Sweet .

synopsis: you somehow find yourself in Vietnam with your best friend Hanni, and the heavy southeast asian heat leaves hanni to her own devices... trope: non-idol!hanni x non-idol!f!reader, best friends to lovers, summer vacation, high school seniors, fluff

wc: 3.9k

cw: none

a/n: hello hello! this is my first fanfic in a long long time, and ive never shared on tumblr before.. but i love hanni's fuckass bob ! please let me know what you guys think, im bit rusty in terms of writing ^^'

-------------------

“So… What do you think?”

You stare at your best friend, mouth agape in complete and utter shock as Hanni stood in front of you. With a sheepish expression on her face, your eyes glaze over the silver blades within Hanni’s left hand as she holds a long lock of her naturally jet black air within her right. As your eyes travel upwards, you’re met with a rather uneven, extremely choppy bob planted on the top of your friend’s head alongside some hastily cut bangs. You would’ve thought it was a poorly done wig if she wasn't already holding evidence of her own wrongdoing within her hands. There's an uncomfortable silence that passes between the two of you as you simply stare, your jaw practically threatening to fall off of the base of your skull as you could see the other girl’s eye twitching ever so slightly in response to your silence. 

“Can you please say something?! It's not that bad I swear!” The vietnamese girl whines out, spinning on her heel and making her way back towards the bathroom where she had initially emerged. With Hanni no longer in your line of sight, you snap out of your daze, shaking your head as your brows knit together in confusion, just now beginning to fully process what you had just seen. You practically fall out of your seat on the couch as you scramble to your feet, following after the other girl as you call out, “wait, wait, what?! When did you do that???”

Hanni had made plans for the summer to visit her family back in Vietnam, and had graciously extended an offer for you to join. Excited and albeit a bit nervous, you instantly agreed, having been meaning to make some fun summer plans between the two of you for a while now. Your best friend’s family was sweet, having met her grandmother alongside a few aunts, uncles, and multiple younger cousins who were all pleased to meet your acquaintance. 

Despite the lovely first day of introductions and adjusting to the horrible jet lag you two experienced once landing, you soon learned that summers in Vietnam were, for lack of a better word, brutal. For the entirety of Southeast Asia, the heat during these months were ruthless, practically leaving everyone in sight panting, sweating, and doing anything possible in order to relieve themselves from the scorching sun– and the humidity. Oh, the humidity. The air felt thick and heavy in a way you’ve never experienced before. It almost felt hard to breathe sometimes because everything around you just felt so… sticky. How did Vietnam manage to make even a supposed nice summer breeze feel hot? Hanni had conveniently managed to not mention the intensity of the weather at the time, and as a result, left you two practically melting into the couch, marinating within your own sweat as Hanni’s grandmother left the two of you home alone for the day.

You practically break down the door to the bathroom to find a distressed Hanni increasingly becoming more panicked the longer she looks at her reflection.  “My Ba used to always cut my hair like this whenever I visited over the summer, I thought it’d be easy to replicate!” Hanni exclaims, staring herself down within the mirror as she tries to assess the damage that has been done at every angle possible. Honestly, the whole situation was almost too good. Almost like a scene from a sitcom or something.

Fighting back a snort, you smirk teasingly, “has she always made it so uneven?” Your unsolicited comment left Hanni clicking her tongue in offense, raising her hand holding the scissors threatening to hit you before shifting her gaze back towards the mirror, letting out a distressed groan in defeat. “I don’t even know what came over me, y/n. I think this unbearable heat actually fried my brain,” she runs her free hand through her hair, some poorly cut strands falling out as she winces, “I don’t know! I don’t know! My Ba made it look so easy!” You watch as her eyes dart around, not talking to anyone in particular as the panic seemingly begins to take over, “I can fix it though! If i just cut–”

“Nope.” You firmly grab Hanni’s wrist as she begins to lift the scissors back up towards her hair, cutting her words short as you wrestle the blades out of her grip. “Y/n–” she starts, “Hanni.” You begin, your voice a tone that is similar to that of an owner telling a dog to sit, eyebrows raised and head cocked to the side as you lock eyes with your friend. She silently stares back, mouth open as if to retort, but it soon closes as she sighs, sitting down on a nearby stool in defeat as you also let out a breath you didnt you know you were holding. At least she didn't have free reign over the scissors. 

“Now let me see what I can do about… this,” You hum, dragging the stool closer to where you stood as you get a better look at Hanni’s hair. The scissors she used were very obviously not haircutting scissors, but you doubted she had anything better on hand. Alongside that, she somehow managed to cut drastically uneven halves of her hair, and it was obvious the cuts on both the left and right side were not a clean process, leaving multiple bluntly chopped bits all within her hair. As for the bangs, thankfully she didn’t cut them too short, actually leaving a lot of hair left to work with. Knowing Hanni, she was probably too scared to commit to the act after seeing what she did to the rest of her hair. Now, you were no hair cutting expert, but anyone with eyes could see what needed to be done in order to fix this mess. Hanni awkwardly avoids eye contact seemingly out of embarrassment as you examine her, eyes looking practically anywhere but within yours as you contemplate your next steps, her cheeks faintly dusted a light shade of pink. You raise the scissors and start off by trying to even out both sides of her hair, the quiet snipping sounds filling the bathroom as Hanni sits up as straight as she can, hands placed a bit too formally on her lap. 

“Do you even know what you’re doing?” 

“Apparently more than you.”

“That's not very comforting.”

“I can always leave your hair like this.”

“Don’t you dare, y/n.” 

Soft, lighthearted giggles erupt from the bathroom as the banter between you two continues. Even in a situation like this, you and Hanni always managed to make each other smile– It's what drew you two to each other. You recall the day you two first met. Through some common friends or the other, somehow you ended up at a picnic within the local park, Hanni being one of the first to arrive. She had brought a container full of fruit to share, and practically dominated the conversation with her cheery attitude– but not in a suffocating kind of way. She somehow managed to know everyone who arrived and they all seemed to naturally flock towards the girl. You were no different than the people she attracted, but you were lucky enough to have her full attention the whole day, her large round eyes attentive and focused on you as you told stories and cracked with everyone. Ever since then, the two of you have been practically inseparable. Always waiting for each other after classes and somehow ending up in comical situations such as this.

After a few more snips of the scissors, you take a step back, taking in your work as Hanni’s eyes flutter open, blinking a bit as she stands up. She approaches the mirror, eyes lighting up as she sees the result. Thanks to your handiwork, her hair had ended up in a lovely dark layered bob with straight across bangs that actually looked intentional. It was a bit shorter than your liking, having the ends land just above her chin, but the other girl didn’t give you much to work with.

“Wow, this actually looks… really good.” Hanni spoke, her voice laced with awe as she continued to admire her reflection, “I kind of look like Mathilda! Y'know, from that kid assassin movie or whatever?” She comments, looking back at you expectantly as you pretend to think for a moment.

“Ah.. That's unfortunate, I was really trying to go for an Edna Mode kind of look… Maybe a bowl cut…” You trail off, feigning regret as you twirl the scissors in your hand, eliciting a snort from Hanni, punching you in the shoulder as you let out a laugh. 

The other girl doesn’t hesitate to pull you into a hug though, even through all of the laughter, and you tense up for only a moment before melting into her touch, your arms wrapping around her waist as her arms snake comfortably around your neck. The light smell of flowers emerges from the embrace, unintentionally causing you to sigh with pleasure as you can feel the vibrations of Hanni giggling into your neck in response. The feeling left your stomach fluttering with butterflies for some reason. Hanni had always smelt really nice, but this time it was a little different– a little more fresh? Maybe the tropical air was doing something to her. 

“Thank you,” you hear her whisper into your ear gently, and you could feel your cheeks warm at the praise as you pull back shyly tucking a strand of your own hair behind your ear as you shrug, “It really was no big deal,” You trail off as Hanni’s gaze shifts back onto her reflection. “Still, I wasn't expecting it to be so… Short.”

You arch a brow at her as you bluntly state, “Well you didn't give me a whole lot of leeway with your little scissor-happy act over there,” which rewarded you with another punch on the shoulder and a tongue stuck out in a childish manner from the short haired girl.

As the two of you exit the bathroom, Hanni lets out a relieved sigh, “aaah, that feels SO much better!” She cooes, stretching her arms and shaking her head, letting her short hair fly as she grins. You also smile at the sight of your friend so happy, but let out a tired breath shortly after. “Well I’m glad you like it, but it's still hot as hell in here.”

An imaginary lightbulb goes off within Hanni’s head as a grin forms on her lips. “I know a place, c’mon,” Hanni grabs your arm, guiding you outside as you immediately get hit with a wave of heat and a flash of light. Squinting, you use your free arm to try and shield your eyes from the sun above, “Do we HAVE to be outside?” You whine, feeling beads of sweat forming on your forehead almost instantaneously as you’re guided to a rather charming looking vespa parked nearby. It was pastel yellow in color, and had some stickers plastered on the side. You watch in awe as the other girl hops on it with confidence, taking a pair of keys out of her pocket as she pats the free seat behind her, “do you HAVE to keep complaining and not trust me?” 

You are once again brought back to a dumbfounded state as you slowly approach the vespa, admiring its quality and state before your eyes go back to Hanni, “Can you actually drive this thing? You never told me!” An almost cartoonish glimmer shines within her eyes as she winks, pressing a finger to her lips as she playfully grins, “There's a lot you don’t know about me, y/n.”

Very hesitantly, you slowly make your way onto the back seat of the vespa, awkwardly sitting as a brief second of silence passes. Hanni rolls her eyes, chuckling lightheartedly at your uncertainty as she grabs your arms and places them around her waist, “You can trust me with this y/n, I promise.” Her voice was soft and reassuring, and she looked at you with her all too familiar warm eyes that made it nearly impossible to not trust her at that very moment. Besides, Hanni wouldn’t actually let you get hurt, you knew that much. Reluctantly, you let out a sigh and tighten your grip on Hanni’s waist, saying a soft “okay…” which resulted in an unseen smile from the other girl and the sound of the engine to rev confidently.

-

If there was one thing Ho Chi Minh City locals perfected, it was the art of organized chaotic traffic. You fearfully bite back a scream as you watch as oncoming traffic simply did not stop for anyone anywhere ever. People did not look before crossing the street and every vespa, motorbike, car, or other miscellaneous vehicle simply maneuvered around one other to get around. You swear your grip on Hanni at this point would cut off all circulation in her body as she lets out a loud and hearty laugh amongst the chaos, speeding up as she weaves in between pedestrians with ease, as if she's been doing this her entire life. “Hanni what the HELL–”

Soon enough the two of you made it out of the city, and Hanni guides you through the dusty terrain of the more rural areas of Vietnam. You were a bit nervous at first, unsure if you were a fan of the bumpy nature of the rocky road that was debatably either safer or more dangerous than those in the city. Once you realize Hanni was no longer entertaining your fears though, you take a moment to finally get out of your own head and live in the moment. Inhale. Exhale. Your eyes glisten as you take in the sights around you. It was so… Green. The lush flora coats the environment with a serene green glow, and the feeling of the wind flying through your hair was such a freeing feeling. Your grasp on Hanni loosens as you let out a loud cheer, laughing as you let everything go. The dappled spots of light from the overhead trees rush past your vision below as you look forward, spotting multiple ox and farmers ahead within the flooded fields. The clouds ahead looked so incredibly soft, and the sky looked bigger than ever– even bigger than how it looked on the plane ride here. You can't help but wonder if it were nighttime, would you be able to see the stars here? You press your cheek against Hanni’s back as you relish in the feeling for a bit, closing your eyes in bliss as the sounds of the nature around you fade.

Before you knew it, the green forestry surrounding you was slowly diminishing, eventually being replaced with a more beige sandy soil. A small gasp leaves your lips as you look out, spotting a small beach with an even larger body of water. The waves glistened beneath the summer sun and you were surprised such a place had absolutely no human traffic. “I found this place when I first got Sunny here,” Hanni practically reads your mind, also glancing over at the ocean before finding a place to park her vespa and hop off, “It's a place the locals keep a secret, and now you also know of it as well.”

You tilt your head a bit in confusion at her comment, hopping off of the vehicle, “Sunny?” Hanni raises her eyebrow as she points to the back end of the Vespa, a large sticker labeled ‘Sunny’ in large white letters is proudly showcased on Hanni’s vespa, and you mentally facepalm as the other girl giggles. Still, it left a warm feeling within your chest knowing Hanni was sharing a hidden area like this with you.

“Come on, let's go in the water! It's hot out here!!” Hanni exclaims loudly, immediately booking it towards the ocean ahead, kicking her shoes off and into the sand in the process. Your eyes widen as you chase after her, hastily taking your shoes off as well as you call out, “Hanni, wait! We didn’t bring our swim suits!” You hissed a little as the sand was unrealistically hot from the sun practically cooking it throughout the day, muttering out little “ow, ow, ow’s” as you hopscotch your way into the water. You couldn't help but notice Hanni was unbothered by the temperature, her new hair allowing a newfound freshness within her step. It truly seemed like she was made for the beach.

“So…?” Hanni extends the word playfully with a grin, already calf deep into water by the time you awkwardly trudge through the ocean towards her, kicking up liquid in the process and splashing Hanni’s shorts. She gasps in shock at the cold sensation and you open your mouth to apologize before getting cut off by water getting shot directly into your face. Salty water entered your mouth and nearly up your nose and you spat it out, wiping your face with your hands as your eyes focused and landed on the culprit, who stared at you with a mischievous grin, bent down within the water to prepare for her next attack. 

“Oh no you dont–” You immediately side step and just narrowly miss an icy cold splash of water before you, bending over to counterattack with twice as much. A high pitched scream followed by genuine laughter followed suit, and the two of you go at it for a little bit, splashing water back and forth in between fits of laughter, completely drenching your clothes. You were happy. Being here, being with her. You took a moment to truly take in the sight of the girl before you. Eyes crescent shaped as she laughs from her heart, a toothy open mouth grin that you knew was genuine and grew to love over the years, and the way her newly cut hair was soaked and stuck to her cheeks and forehead charmingly. You loved the energy Hanni always brought to the table, her constant smile and the endless surprises she had up her sleeve. You were glad she chose you of all people to be her best… friend.

…Oh.

Hanni however, is not aware of your current sentimental and affectionate internal thoughts towards her, and decides to up her game with a new strategy, smirking to herself as she backs up, building up energy while you were catching your breath. You were so worn out and lost within your own thoughts you only noticed the charging bob-haired girl all too late, “Hanni WAI–” 

Practically all of the air got knocked out of you as Hanni strikes you down with a full body bear hug, sending the both of you into the water with a loud splash. Satisfied with her work (and quite worn out by now) Hanni doesn’t even make an attempt to hold you down, going full dead fish on your chest with an innocent grin and multiple giggles as you prop yourself up within the water with your arms. Coughing pathetically, you use one of your hands to wipe your face and slick back your hair as you look at Hanni, who rests very comfortably between your legs and on your chest, her arms wrapped around your waist as she looks up at you with those big dark brown eyes. Your breath hitches as you realize how close your faces are to one another. It wasn’t like you two haven't been this physically close before, but that never stopped you from being flustered. Something about the way she looks at you sometimes always caught you off guard, and you never knew how to handle it. The last time this happened was at your last sleepover together, having talked about past crushes, relationships, and how dating would work after high school graduation. Something about the way she looked at you underneath the sheets after asking about your crushes made your mind go blank. She had that look in her eyes again, and it drove you crazy how you couldn't read it. Cheeks reddening, you instinctively whip your head away, needing to look at something other than Hanni to keep yourself propped up within the water.

Frowning at this reaction, Hanni reaches a hand up and cusps your cheek, guiding your head to face her once again, forcing you to make eye contact with her. “y/n…” Her tone was soft and airy, if anything it was a bit needy. The blush on your cheeks was apparent at this point, and you still had no idea why you were even blushing in the first place, but the way her eyes flickered down to your lips for a split second intensified the color tenfold. You watch as her eyebrows knit together and how she subconsciously bites her lip, a habit she had whenever she was lost in thought– a sight you were familiar with. Even so, it felt different this time. 

You watch as Hanni closes her eyes and leans in, softly pressing her lips against yours. It was a gentle kiss, a very hesitant one at that. Just a small peck. You could tell it was Hanni’s way of “testing the waters” (ba dum tss) but to you? It was everything. You quite literally felt fireworks within your stomach as she kissed you, and the shock left you simply frozen in place, eyes comically wide open for the very brief moment. All too soon, she pulls away. She looks up at you again, a glint of fear and uncertainty in her eyes as she waits for your reaction.

You take a moment to simply sit there dazed, mouth agape in the water once again as panic settles within Hanni at the silence. “Oh my god. I'm so sorry y/n. I-I thought—“ She had begun to hurriedly make her way off of your chest when you quickly grabbed her wrist, pulling her back into you as you brought your lips together. Now it was Hanni’s turn to freeze up, but it was only for a moment. Almost immediately after, you could hear her blissfully sighing into the kiss as her arms snake their way around your neck, your free hand moving down her back and landing comfortably on the small of it.

Her lips were soft, and tasted ever so lightly like berries despite having been splashed with saltwater multiple times. You’d never think you’d find yourself within the beaches of Vietnam, kissing your best friend, yet here you were. The sound of waves surrounds the two of you as you find yourself lost within the movements of her lips. You felt her pull away for air and you almost let out a whine at the sudden lack of contact before she starts peppering kisses all over your face. Your cheeks, nose, chin, forehead, everywhere. “You look so pretty right now y/n-nie~” Hanni cooes as you roll your eyes, pulling her in closer as she focuses her kisses onto your cheek. 

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’ve been wanting to do this for a long time,” you tease, getting a hum in response as Hanni brings you back in for another kiss, whispering “you have no idea..”

“So… Do you have a crush on me or something?”

“Do you not like me back, y/n?”

“Well… I don't know about that...”

“I'm going to leave you here.”

“Noooo~”

Several splashes and giggles erupted from the both of you, and suddenly summer just became a little sweeter.

[euphoricfilter]

regret:

pairing: jungkook x gn! reader

genre: non-idol au || angst ||

summary: regret is the worst emotion

tags/ warnings: kinda just angst… the ending is ambiguous so you can try make it happy if you want

notes: a little ramble based on how i feel at the moment as a little treat before bed <3 i feel very rusty because i haven’t written in so long

☆ where you can find the rest of my stuff!!

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆.

the knowledge that the thing you want to say is going to hurt someone you care about is the worst feeling. a strange sinking in your chest, malleable guilt that chews away at your mind and your heart.

words tacky on your tongue as you rehearse them in your head over and over, a well practiced script. because ending something with someone you like a lot hurts. really, truly, hurts.

it hurts knowing you’ll hurt them and it hurts not knowing how your relationship will be after you utter the miserable set of words stuck in your mind.

jungkook was your first.

jungkook was your everything.

he was perfect, within whatever limitation human perfection has. he treated you like you were the best thing on the face of the earth. you were the light of his eyes, perfect in all your imperfect ways. a piece of you tucked away in his mind all hours of the day.

quick to message back when you text about your day. always on the other end of the phone. always there. the one person in the universe who loved you for who you were, the one person who loved to spend time with you all hours of the day. just the silent comfort of knowing you were there enough for him.

gentle as his fingers would run through your hair, legs tangled together and breathing soft as you linger between the waking world and gentle sleep.

his love for you was all consuming.

which is why you didn’t understand why it felt like your world was crumbling. a phantom hand wrapped around your delicate neck, constricting every breath you took.

a constant spiraling anxiety, tugging you further and further into this abyss of worry and self loathing.

the strange self loathing you have when you don’t know yourself anymore. unsure why. what reason there is to your existence. why people even liked you when it felt like you had nothing else to offer.

and at the time you thought you needed a break.

palms sweaty as you hold the phone to your ear, boyfriend understandably concerned by your recent lack of communication.

“hello..?” jungkook answers.

you swallow, “hi” it comes out quiet, throat already lodged, eyes glossy.

“what’s wrong, baby?” he hums, you hear him shuffle on the other end of the phone.

your lungs inflate as you take a deep breathe

“i..” you start, all that practice getting you nowhere as your mind stops, guilt clawing it’s way up your throat.

“baby?” he presses on, worry evident in his voice.

“i don’t know if i can do this anymore” the bitter words slip off your tongue, “you don’t deserve this”

and of course jungkook had been baffled. though maybe a small part of him knew that this was coming, how you’d slowly started to creep away from him. the unintentional distance scratching the surface of what was rattling around your mind.

“if this isn’t what you want… then that’s okay” he breathes, “i just want you to be happy”

you feel the tears trickle down the mounds of your cheeks, “no” you huff, “god, jungkook please don’t be nice right now”

“what do you want me to do?” he laughs, though you can feel the lack of humor, laugh dry as it’s pushed past his lips.

you wipe your wet cheeks, “call me a bitch or something”

“i’m not gonna call you a bitch” he sighs.

“but you don’t deserve this… i should have at least come in person or… i don’t know” you cry, “i feel like such a horrible person”

“you’re not a horrible person” he hums, “i don’t want you to feel bad”

“too late” you murmur, “i feel like shit… you’re just so nice and i really like you…. but i don’t think i can do this anymore”

the fact he has been so nice had made it harder. the sadness in his voice as he reassured you as you cried. the moment sinking in when you finally put your phone down. you’d shattered something so lovely. you’d ripped away the only person who made you feel seen.

and the week after was no different. he didn’t message you. so you never tried reaching out, how could you when you’d broken his heart.

it felt selfish missing him. wanting any sort of contact you could get.

and when he messaged about bringing some of your stuff over back to your place, that wasn’t enough. you knew that the small exchange wouldn’t be enough because you missed him, and asking for friendship after you ended the relationship chewed away at your mind.

sometimes missing someone is a strange feeling. knowing that the dynamic you once had is totally different, that it might never be the same as it was.

and sometimes missing someone hurts a little less than the guilt that eats away at you for what you have done. or missing someone can hide that slither of regret you have, wishing you knew you’d hate life without them as much as you did with them.

the world is lonely when you don’t feel seen.

dread wrapping around your mind. slowly sinking further and further into the darkness. nights spent thinking about the moments you’d shared together. that maybe you want what was once there.

you missed jungkook more than you’d like admit and it was eating away at your heart.

all it took was a week. a week of silence. a week of being alone and figuring out life by yourself.

you tip your head up, full moon shining down on the street as you stand outside jungkook’s apartment building, feet shuffling against the ground as you hold your phone to your chest. you’d written a message, rewritten the message, thought about what you’d say.

and that selfish part of you wants to send it. that selfish part of you wanting him to be there, for you to touch him, know that he’s really there and you can change what had happened.

[save-the-villainous-cat]

“Where would be the fun in telling you the whole story?” the villain asked. They leaned forward in their chair, handcuffs rattling. “C’mon, you’re clever. Surprise me.”

“I know you’ve murdered a supervillain. An incredibly powerful non-human being. Someone, well, something I’ve been chasing after for years.” The hero crossed their arms in front of their chest. Was it really that easy? An entire threat being reduced to nothing because of the villain? “People might start calling you a hero.”

“A hero? Would that make me your what? Partner?”

“Well, right now you’re under investigation for murder. Even if it’s a supervillain, it’s still a crime.” The hero couldn’t wrap their head around why the villain would kill an ally that easily. It wasn’t like the villain was a particularly active one. More or less, they were like a puppet master, controlling other people from behind the scenes. That was dangerous enough in itself but the villain being active, being a threat instead of controlling the threads was even more worrying.

“You are the one who questioned the supervillain’s humanity just now. They’re something, not someone,” the villain pointed out.

That was foul. Using the hero’s words against them wasn’t new but both of them were fully aware of the contradiction here — was it wrong to kill a bad person? And was it right to get convicted for that?

“Is that a confession?”

The villain cocked their head, smirking even.

“You tell me. Is that enough to lock me up?”

“The evidence speaks for itself.”

“You’re drawing conclusions based on assumptions,” the villain argued. “And after all, they were a friend of mine. Why on earth should I kill someone who’s my friend?”

Indeed, the motive was the only inexplicable part in all of this.

“We have found samples of your DNA at the crime scene.”

“The victim and I used to meet there quite often to discuss work. You can ask my employees, I have a perfect record of my whereabouts for the last few months.” They looked the hero up and down, as if this was a date instead of an interrogation. They smiled when the hero’s eyes met theirs.

“You have bruises on your arms,” the hero pointed out. “The…victim was struggling before they died. There was quite the fight.”

Suddenly, the villain didn’t look as amused as before.

“You have bruises on your arms as well,” they said.

The hero blushed.

Unfortunately, a week ago the hero had actually attempted to take down the supervillain. They’d been beaten to a horrific degree and only thanks to modern medicine, they were walking and breathing.

Two days ago, some of the supervillain’s henchmen had “visited” the hero to make sure they’d gotten the message. They were still limping, refusing to go back to their medic again.

“My bruises are from practice. You can ask my martial arts teacher, I was with him yesterday.” They eyed the hero’s bruises, so the hero pushed down their sleeves.

The hero sighed.

“I’m sure all your ‘employees’ and your ‘martial arts teacher’ are in on this?” The hero closed their eyes, letting their hand go over their face a couple of times. “I know it was you. But…why? I’m a good detective. I will get more evidence. And I will most certainly figure out why you did it.”

The villain stared at them, their interest focused on the index finger the hero was holding up. They looked up at the hero eventually.

“Don’t break your pretty little head thinking too much about it, hm?”

[kitkatscabinet]

KINKTOBER 03 - Drugged

John Mactavish x f! Reader

Warnings: non-con, drugged reader, delulu Soap. This is fucked up. For @bunnyreaper <3

Your head was pounding, mouth full of cotton as you attempted to gain your bearings through squinted eyes. Any attempts to sit up are met with immediate and violent protest from your body. The world lurches and you practically fall in a boneless heap against the mattress.

In your brief struggle to orient yourself, the blanket covering what you realise is your naked body, had slipped down to your waist. Exposing bare skin covered in various bruises and bite marks.

Horror seized your body, bile filling your mouth as your still fuzzy mind caught onto the implications of what had happened. Tears filled your eyes, blurring your already fuzzy vision, as you desperately tried to recall what had happened.

Despite your best efforts you remember nothing but arriving at the small party that had been thrown in your honour. A recent promotion had come your way, something that required you to transfer bases, thus the joint celebratory/farewell party.

Had you really gotten so drunk that you’d fallen into bed with someone? Unfortunately, the door opens before you have time to properly gather your thoughts. Your visions still not the best but as the figure gets closer you manage to make out a few distinguishing features.

“Mactavish?” The hoarseness of your voice leaves you cringing a little. He’s close enough that you can see his brow furrow, bottom lip jutting out slightly in a pout.

“Thought I told ye to call me Johnny.” He sets what you now realise to be a glass of water and plate of some sort of breakfast down on the small wooden bed side table as her perched on the mattress. “How’re you feelin?” He raises a hand to gently cup your cheek, blue eyes gazing adoringly into yours.

To say you’re confused is an understatement. You and John Mactavish didn’t exactly run in the same circles, more than acquaintances but certainly less than friends. Even if his eyes did seem to intensely focus on you whenever he was near.

“What? What happened?” You manage to get out, just barely managing to prevent yourself from flinching at his touch. His frown deepens even further at your words, hand dropping from your cheek and your heart begins to pound.

“You don’t remember?” There’s a palpable hurt in his tone. Not good. Even in your unnaturally lethargic state, your instincts are screaming.

Bits and pieces had come back to you, but trying to remember felt like staring directly at the sun. Though you do remember leaving with Soap, his concerned blue eyes flashing in the forefront of your mind at your drunkenness. “I… everything’s a little blurry, remind me?”

“Ye had a bit too much to drink, I brought you home, sobered you up.” His words are clearly not the entire truth, the evidence of what he’d done painfully evident on your skin. He must realise what your silence met as he continued on with a smile as if there was nothing wrong.

“Wanted to wait till you were awake for our first time, but you were so gorgeous lying there, teasing me in yer sleep tha’ I couldna help myself.” He apologised, pressing loving kisses on the inside of your forearm.

You want to scream. Tears already sliding down your cheeks at the verbal confirmation of what you already knew.

Warm hands are instantly cupping your cheeks, attempting to wipe your tears before your face is peppered with kisses. There’s slight alarm in his tone as he says “don’t cry lass, hate to see your pretty face covered in tears that aren’t from pleasure. It’s ok.”

Suddenly the blanket, your only shield, is thrown away and John’s mass is on top of you. “If I’d known you’d be so upset about forgetting our first time then I’d have waited. Let me make it up to ya lass.” With that he’s dipped his head down to claim a nipple between his teeth.

You screech, uselessly weak arms attempting to shove his head away as your panic reaches an all time high. He simply huffs through his nose in amusement, and to your horror let’s out a satisfied groan as your nails scrape against his scalp.

He lifts his head abruptly to claim your lips in an open mouthed kiss. It’s an aggressive clash of teeth and spit as his tongue greedily darts into your mouth. He takes your moment of surprise to bury his already hard cock in your ill prepared pussy. His mouth swallowing your surprised shriek of slight pain as he pants in bliss.

He sets a brutal pace immediately, giving you no chance to adjust as his hips piston relentlessly. Soap only pulls away from your mouth to babble a string of expletives as he hooks one of your legs over his shoulder.

“S’fuckin perfect, so pliant and perfect for me, sucking me in where I belong” he grunts, hands gripping bruises into your hips. You’re powerless to do anything but take it, shaky arms scratching at his chest only eliciting a laugh.

To your horror, the pain doesn’t last, your body betraying your minds will as one hand snakes down to roughly press on your clit. His thumb moves in slow circles, greatly contrasting the increasing speed of his thrusts as he mouths at any available skin he can reach.

Involuntarily you moan, clenching down on him as the assault of pleasure becomes too much.

“There’s my good girl, doing so well f’me” Johnny's voice is a little strained, sweat dripping from his forehead onto your chest as his movements falter. “Need you to cum for me lass” he grunts, and before you can attempt to stop yourself, you do, eyes fluttering shut as you whine pathetically loud.

The feel of your tight walls clenching down on him even harder proves too much for Soap and the dismayed cry you let out at feeling his cum full you is overpowered by his groans.

The sound of the door opening has your eyes shooting open, a sliver of hope filling you as someone else steps in. John on the other hand, doesn’t seem to care about the intrusion, his hips continuing to move as he overstimulates the both of you.

As the figure steps closer you finally recognise Ghost, though all your hopes are cruelly snuffed out when he speaks. “Johnny you done? People will get suspicious soon.”

You didn’t think you could spiral into even more despair but Ghost’s words shatter you. Soap is decidedly very unhappy with the news, though mercifully he pulls away, letting your body rest.

Seeing the devastation on your face Soap frowned, leaning down to place a loving kiss on your forehead. “Don’t worry bonnie, I’ll be back soon, and then we’ll discuss your attempt at leaving me.” With that he followed Ghost from the room, locking the door behind him and leaving you to your despair.

[candycandy00]

Little Miss Nobody Part 1 - A Gojo x Reader Fanfic

You’re a weak, lowly sorcerer who barely qualifies as an assistant, but you get the opportunity to work on a mission that includes THE Gojo Satoru. Unbeknownst to you, he finds you incredibly attractive despite privately looking down on you as a nobody. On the last night of the mission, he invites you to his hotel room.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Smut. 18+. Gojo x short/thick/curvy fem Reader. Loss of virginity, rough sex, oral sex, etc. Gojo is unintentionally an asshole.

You couldn’t contain your excitement when you were chosen, along with five others, to be assistants on a two week long mission that involved THE Gojo Satoru. You never thought you’d get to work with him. After all, you were a weak, low grade sorcerer who came from a non-sorcerer family. But someone needed to run errands, take notes, and basically act as a gopher. You were eager to take on that role if it meant you got to be near Gojo, if only to watch him work. 

Three years ago, when you were still a third year at your tiny local Jujutsu school, you had technically met him. You and a few other third years had been sent on what was supposed to be a very easy mission. Things went south quickly when a special grade curse appeared, and all you and your classmates could do was flee and hide. Gojo had apparently been in the area at the time on unrelated business and was called over to bail your group out. 

You still remembered how cool he looked as he destroyed the curse with seemingly no effort whatsoever. Then he called the lot of you out from hiding and told you it was safe. He’d been friendly enough, but he didn’t stay to chat. Someone like him was probably busy. 

You couldn’t be sure because of his blindfold, but you thought he never even looked your direction. 

Of course he didn’t. 

Now, you worked mostly as an assistant to other, more powerful sorcerers. But you didn’t mind. You were happy that you could contribute, even in small ways. 

When you arrived at the meeting place to get acquainted with the sorcerers you’d be working with and go over the plan of action over the next two weeks, you tried not to stare at Gojo. He was so much taller than you remembered, and up close, his presence was imposing. He joked around with everyone and acted casual, but you could feel it: his intimidating aura. 

It was your first time seeing him without his blindfold, but his sunglasses prevented you from seeing his eyes. What a shame, you’d heard they were breathtaking. 

You introduced yourself and said the expected pleasantries, and you giggled at his jokes, but that was as far as your courage could take you. For the rest of the meeting, you tried to stay quiet and stay out of the way. 

************

Gojo Satoru noticed her the moment she showed up for the meeting. How could he not? Even under fairly modest clothing, her incredibly erotic body shape was evident. Large, shapely breasts straining against her sweater, thick, plush hips and thighs that looked like they’d been poured into her jeans, plump lips that he couldn’t help imagining wrapped around his cock, all wrapped up in a short frame that could so easily be thrown around in bed. 

She was his type. So much so that it seemed like she’d been designed top to bottom by the gods to drive him wild. But he never let on. He talked to her the same way he talked to everyone else, and his dark sunglasses kept her from noticing how he stared at her curves. 

As the mission commenced, Gojo found himself going to talk to her often, even though she was a weak, practically useless nobody. She was a sweet little thing though, always trying to be helpful in whatever ways her extremely limited abilities would allow. She even made homemade sweets in the kitchen of the condo they’d rented to be their base of operations. Her confections were delicious, and Gojo definitely noticed how much she blushed when he told her so. 

He noticed a lot of things, like the way her eyes seemed to seek him out whenever the group was gathered in one place, the way she stared at him with rosy cheeks when she thought he wasn’t looking, the way she seemed to talk with a bubbly smile with the others but became quiet and shy when he was near. 

Gojo knew he was a very attractive man. He’d seen these signs before, many times. This sweet girl with the lewd body that had him jacking off in the shower while thinking about her… she had a crush on him. 

He had mixed feelings about that. On one hand, it meant getting her into his bed would be no challenge at all. Hell, he probably could have fucked her on the first night if he’d tried. But on the other hand, it was a nuisance when someone lowly like her developed feelings for him. He always tried to let them down gently, to avoid breaking their hearts, but that was much harder to do after he’d fucked their brains out. 

Gojo wasn’t a cruel man. He never made promises, and he never intentionally led anyone on. In fact he tried to be very clear about what he wanted and sometimes avoided sleeping with people who had obvious crushes on him altogether, just to avoid drama. But sometimes the person in question was hot, and he couldn’t resist. And often, even though he felt he was being upfront about only wanting a one night stand, people who had developed feelings for him had a hard time accepting that truth. 

He watched the young woman, whom he’d mentally dubbed “Little Miss Nobody”, as she bent over to get some clean dishes from the condo’s dishwasher. She was wearing a skirt that fell to a modest length when she was standing, but bent over, her soft thighs were exposed. Her perfectly round, thick ass was in the air. Oh, the things he wanted to do to her. 

She stood back up and began placing the dishes in the cabinets. She stood on her tip toes and reached up to try to place something in the top shelf, and both her skirt and T-shirt rode up her body. She was clearly struggling, her short height making the task difficult. Gojo enjoyed the view for a moment from the living room, then walked into the kitchen and stood behind her. “Need some help?”

The poor girl almost jumped out of her skin when she heard his voice so close to her. She blushed and pulled her shirt back down. “Uh, yeah, I’m having trouble reaching the top cabinet.”

He moved in closer, his body brushing against hers as he reached around her and placed the cups in their cabinet. Fuck, he wanted to lift her up and shove her face down on the counter, letting her short legs dangle in the air as he pounded into her from behind. She’d probably let him right now, even with the others in the living room, able to see the whole thing. Her face was red, she was so flustered it was adorable. 

That’s when he decided, after the mission was over, on their last night in town, he would invite her to his hotel room and fuck her as much as he wanted. 

When the last night arrived, everyone had gathered at a sushi joint to celebrate the successful end to the mission. Gojo made a point of sitting next to Little Miss Nobody, making sure his arm brushed against hers whenever he reached for something on the table, making funny remarks to hear her tinkling little laugh, and enjoying the shy, nervous energy she had. 

As everyone stood up from the table, Gojo placed one hand on her shoulder to get her attention, then leaned in to whisper, “Wanna come to my hotel room?”

She looked shocked, her face turning instantly crimson. Her eyes darted about frantically, and she reminded him of a frightened rabbit. “Um… I guess so…” 

He laughed, slipping an arm around her casually. “Don’t be so nervous. Let’s have a night of fun before we leave town.”

She nodded, wearing a small, sweet smile. “Okay,” she said, and she walked out the door with him and up the street to his hotel. 

Having her body pressed against his as they walked was getting him amped up. He was already hard by the time they stepped into his room and shut the door behind them. 

Gojo wasted no time turning her around and pushing her against the inside of the door, covering her hot little mouth with his own, kissing her deeply, his hands on the hem of her shirt, pulling it up. 

He was so wrapped up in trying to get her shirt off, he almost didn’t notice the weak hands pressing against his chest, trying to push him back. She might as well have been trying to push a boulder. 

But he stopped and looked down at her. “Is something wrong?”

She looked like she might cry, and for a moment the terrible thought that he’d been entirely wrong about her struck his mind. But she was still blushing furiously, and her eyes were full of desire. 

“No, nothing’s wrong,” she said, and he felt immense relief, “but… I think I should tell you… I’ve never done this before.”

He cocked his head and grinned. “Never fucked a guy in a hotel room?”

She shook her head. “Never… been with a guy at all.”

His grin vanished. “Wait, you’re a virgin?”

She nodded, averting her eyes. 

Fuck. She was a virgin. He hadn’t expected that. Sure she was a little shy but with a body like hers, she had to have been turning men down left and right. And while he couldn’t deny that being the guy to pop such a sexy girl’s cherry was hot to think about, there were other things to consider. Deflowering someone usually came with emotional baggage he just didn’t want to deal with. 

He knew he should just call the whole thing off. Tell her it was a mistake, make up a lie, anything. But she was here, inside his hotel room, ready and willing to let him fuck her. She was looking at him with glassy eyes, her lips slightly parted, her shirt pulled up to just under her tits. 

He wanted her. He’d imagined doing countless filthy things to her these past two weeks, and now he had her all to himself. How could he possibly resist?

************

You knew what you were getting into when you agreed to go to Gojo’s hotel room. Even as naive as you were, you could figure out that much. You’d been so shocked and flattered that you hadn’t even considered saying no. THE Gojo Satoru wanted you? A weak, useless little peon? 

He’d been nice to you throughout the whole mission, talking to you, including you in strategy meetings even though you had nothing to do with strategy, giving you praise for completing even simple tasks. But he was friendly with everyone. He laughed and talked with everyone. 

Now you were in his hotel room. He’d kissed you, touched you, and you knew where this was going. The thought of losing your virginity to Gojo was thrilling, but also a little scary. Would your inexperience be a turn off? He’d seemed a little hesitant when you told him this was your first time. 

But soon he was kissing you again, his hands pulling your shirt over your head and tossing it aside. He stepped back slightly to look at your lacy bra, but before he could reach around to unhook it, you stopped him again. 

“Can I see your eyes?” you asked, looking up into his sunglasses. “Please?”

He smiled, then reached up one hand and pulled the sunglasses off, letting them drop to the floor. You couldn’t suppress a gasp when you saw his eyes for the first time. They were so unbelievably gorgeous, like pure blue crystals. You wanted to look at them all night. 

“You like them?” he asked with a grin. 

“I do,” you answered. “They’re so beautiful…”

He shrugged. “Some people say they’re creepy.”

If you were being honest, they were a little creepy, but in a “so beautiful they’re inhuman” way. 

Gojo started kissing you again, leaning over to kiss your neck as he unhooked your bra and pulled the straps down your shoulders, finally discarding it on the floor. Then his hands were groping both breasts, lightly squeezing the pillowy flesh. He bent further down, trailing kisses down your collar bone until his mouth closed over one nipple, his tongue running over it. 

“Ahh!” You couldn’t help letting out a small moan as he licked one nipple while his fingers pinched the other. 

He slid down to a crouching position in front of you. The metal door felt cold against your bare back as you reflexively backed into it. You watched with bated breath as he unzipped your skirt. Then he looked up at you with those eyes as he slowly pulled your skirt down your hips, your thighs, your calves, and then let it pool at your feet. He only took a moment to look at your pale pink panties before he pulled those down too, then he leaned back to get a good view. 

You closed your eyes. You’d always been a little self conscious about your body, but having this incredibly good looking man stare at your naked body made you feel like shrinking into a ball and hiding. 

But then you heard his voice. 

“Fuck, you’re even hotter than I imagined.”

You opened your eyes. “Really?”

He was wearing a sultry expression, leaned back on his heels with his thighs apart. That’s when you noticed the prominent bulge in his pants. He tilted his head toward your face and said, “Do you not realize how sexy you are? You had me wound up for two weeks. I spent half the time imagining…” His voice cut off. Perhaps he thought it best not to continue, but now you were curious. 

“What were you imagining?”

He rose to his feet, and his tall frame towered over yours as he stepped closer. “All kinds of things. Fucking you on the couch at the condo. Bending you over the kitchen table. My cock in your mouth…”

Your breaths were coming quicker as you listened. You had no idea he’d been thinking such things about you, but knowing it now made your whole body tingle. 

“Think you can do that for me?” he murmured against your neck as he began kissing you again. “Suck my dick with that cute mouth of yours?”

Your heart was pounding. You wanted nothing more than to please him, to be with him as long as you could. “I can try,” you said with a shaky voice. 

He pulled away then and took you by the hand, leading you over to the bed. He sat down on the edge of it, and gently pushed you to your knees in front of him, between his spread legs. You looked from his crotch to his face, waiting for him to open his pants. Instead he yawned dramatically and said, “I’m just so tired from the mission. Can’t even get my own dick out. You can do that for me, right?” Then he grinned at you. 

You couldn’t help smiling. He was clearly trying to lighten the mood so you wouldn’t be so nervous. You reached out and unbuckled his belt, then carefully unbuttoned and unzipped his pants. You hesitated for a moment, then you slipped the waistband of his boxers down until his cock bounced free. 

You’d never seen one in person before, but even you knew it was an impressive organ. It was much bigger than you expected, tall and pale, standing straight up. It was perfect, just like the rest of him. 

With one hand, you lightly gripped him and leaned forward, giving it a quick, feathery lick. You’d seen porn before, so you had an idea of what to do, but you still felt a little awkward. 

“Take it in your mouth,” Gojo said in a soft voice. And you did as told. You wrapped your lips around his cock and took it as far into your mouth as it would fit, gagging slightly as it hit the back of your throat. 

“That’s good,” he said, his hand resting on your head, his fingers entwining with your hair, “now slide your lips up and down it. Use your tongue, that’s it.”

With Gojo’s coaching, you seemed to be doing a decent job of performing your first blowjob. He certainly seemed to be enjoying it, as his cock was twitching and leaking in your mouth as your tongue circled it and your lips closed tightly around it. You kept this up for several minutes, following any instructions he gave, and finally you felt him grow suddenly tense. 

Without any other warning, he came in your mouth, shooting it down your throat and coating your tongue. You didn’t know if you should pull away, so you remained still until he emptied himself out. When he was finished, you backed up, and realized you had a mouth full of his cum. Guys liked it when girls swallowed it, right? So you gulped it down and looked up at Gojo to see his reaction. 

He was staring at your face, smiling. “Now that’s something I’ve been waiting to see,” he said, then patted your head. “Good girl.”

You blushed bright red upon hearing his praise. You made Gojo Satoru feel good! A nobody like you! 

He took your hand again and pulled you up, then pushed you onto the bed, on your back. He climbed onto the bed and pushed your legs apart. 

“Wait,” you said, and he froze, meeting your eyes. You worked up your courage and said, “Are you going to take your shirt off?”

He laughed, raising up to his knees. “You want me to?”

“Yes, please!” Your voice came out more desperate than you intended, and you felt embarrassed until he pulled his shirt up his torso and then over his head. At that moment, all thoughts in your head froze. All you could focus on was his toned body. It looked like it’d been carved from stone, like the statues of angels you’d seen pictures of from museums in Europe. 

Maybe he really was a god. 

He bent back down between your spread open legs and used his thumb to stroke your slit, smearing your wetness around. Then his long fingers parted your folds and he leaned his face forward, running his tongue across your clit. You nearly jumped from the bed. The pleasure that shot through you left you gasping, but he didn’t give you time to catch your breath. He dove back in, using both his fingers and his mouth to stimulate your clit, switching between different motions, keeping you from getting too used to a specific sensation. 

Your body quivered, your hands gripping the sheets, little mewling moans escaping your lips. Unlike you with your clumsy blowjob, Gojo knew exactly what he was doing. You tried not to think about what that meant. 

The pleasure built up, over and over, making you feel like you might burst. Finally, like a dam breaking, you felt delicious release, your legs trembling on either side of him as you rode out the high. 

He looked up at you, his lips glistening with your juices and his eyes shining. “Feel good?” he asked. 

You could only nod, words failing you. 

He rose up again, this time pushing your knees up to your chest and placing your legs on his shoulders, nearly folding you in half. You could feel his tip poking at you. He leaned down close and said, “Ready?”

“Yeah,” you said in a small, unsteady voice, “I think so.”

He gave you a quick kiss on the lips, and then he was pressing himself inside you. It hurt more than you thought it would, a stinging sensation shooting through you, as if you were ripping. You whimpered, closing your eyes again. 

You heard his voice saying, “Fuck, you’re tight.” Then he pressed further in. You clutched at his arms, and he paused. “Hey, look at me.”

You opened your eyes. 

“Do you want me to stop?”

You shook your head, murmuring, “No, I don’t.”

He grinned. “Good. I’m only halfway in. You can take more of me, right?”

You nodded. You weren’t sure how more was going to fit, but you didn’t want this to end. You wanted to please him. 

He kissed your neck, mumbling against your skin, “I bet you can take all of me.”

“Y-yeah,” you said, still clutching his arms. 

“Good girl,” he whispered, then thrusted into you. You winced, feeling like he was splitting you in two, but there were so many other things that felt good. His perfectly sculpted body against yours, the tips of his soft white hair grazing your face and neck when he kissed you, and those angelic eyes looking down at you. 

You thought you would have agreed to letting him cut off your arm. 

He plunged in so deep, you imagined he was reaching your womb, his thrusts becoming faster, rougher. “Fuck,” he muttered, “you feel fucking incredible!”

Suddenly his hands were on your waist, gripping you hard, his hips banging into yours, his thrusting becoming painful. You looked up at him in alarm, only to find a wild look in those beautiful eyes, as if he were possessed, as if he’d lost himself in the pleasure of fucking you as hard as he could. 

You didn’t ask him to stop. You couldn’t bring yourself to, not when he seemed to be enjoying it so much. You simply let him do whatever he wanted with you, even if it hurt. When tears stung your eyes, you tried to wipe them away quickly. 

Deep down, a small part of you liked it, liked the pain, liked the way your body was making Gojo lose control. And that part of you wanted him to fuck you forever. 

************

Gojo knew he should have been gentle with her. It was her first time and he was fucking her like a whore. But something about being inside her turned him into an animal. Even seeing her crying couldn’t make him slow down. The only thing that could have stopped him was her literally telling him to stop, and he didn’t think that was going to happen. 

Because despite her tears and whimpers, her pussy was soaked, clenching him tightly, and her eyes were lusty as they peered up at him. 

He hadn’t bothered with a condom, figuring he would just pull out. But now he was overcome with the desire to fill her with his cum. So when he felt his own orgasm approaching, he drove himself as deeply within her as possible and shot his load. 

Panting, he slowly pulled out of her. His cock was sticky with cum and blood. When he looked down at her face, he realized her eyes were closed and she was breathing quietly. Had she passed out? Shit. Maybe he had been too rough with her. 

He decided to let her sleep while he took a shower and dressed. When finished, he nudged her awake. Her eyes fluttered open and she looked around the room as if she couldn’t remember where she was. Then her eyes met his and she sat up suddenly, pulling the sheets up to cover herself. 

“It’s late,” Gojo told her, “you better let me walk you to your hotel.”

The assistants were staying at a different hotel down the street, closer to the condo. She blinked a few times, then slid out of bed, pulling a sheet with her. He took the hint and turned around while she dressed, thinking it a bit silly after what had just happened. 

He turned back to face her after he heard her pulling her shoes on. She was looking down shyly, avoiding his gaze. “Um, I had a good time tonight,” she said. 

“Good,” he said with his usual smile, “I’m glad you did.”

She lingered beside the bed, not moving toward the door. “Would you… like to have my phone number? In case you ever want to chat sometime…”

Ah, shit. She was getting attached. He’d hoped this wouldn’t happen. She was a nice enough girl and hot as fuck, but she wasn’t the kind of person he could start a relationship with. She was a mere assistant. They were important and he appreciated their work, but as head of the Gojo clan, there were certain expectations about who he should be with. And a girl with so little cursed energy she barely qualified as a an assistant at all was never going to be that person. 

He sighed. Best to just go ahead and rip the bandaid off than to let her get her hopes up. 

“Look, this was just a one time thing,” he said, keeping his voice even and flat. “A night of fun, remember? Nothing more.” He could see the hurt forming in her eyes, but he had to go on. It was for her own good. “You’re real sweet and all, but you and I… we’re just not compatible. Do you understand?”

She looked at him with her bright eyes turning wet. “I get it,” she said, her voice breaking slightly on the words. “I knew this was just a one night stand. Really, I did. But I just thought… maybe we could be friends.” She wiped her eyes as the first tears began to fall. “I’m sorry, that was really stupid of me. Someone like me could never be around someone like you.”

Before he could say anything in response, she ran out the door, not even closing it behind her. 

“Fuck,” he muttered, feeling every bit the asshole so many people accused him of being. He walked over and shut the door, then glanced at the floor, where something shimmery caught his eye. It was one of her earrings. He picked it up and shoved it into his pocket. He moved over to the bed, trying to avoid looking at the red stain in the middle, and picked up the sheet she’d wrapped herself in. It smelled like her, a sweet and bright fragrance. 

He flung the sheet down, shaking his head as if that would somehow shake her presence from his mind. He’d done the right thing, even if it hurt her. She’d get over it. Before long, he would just be a bad memory to her. Hopefully, she would eventually be reduced to a sweet memory for him. 

Tag List:

@snowprincesa1 @pandoraium @hitori979 @famousdestinyland @gloomysel @noodlejitsu @postmancat @lanecass @aquamarine001 @officialholyagua @lil-bexie

If you’d like to be added to the tag list, comment to let me know! You must be an adult! Either have your age in your bio or tell me specifically that you’re an adult please!

[a-silly-alterhuman]

Anyone who doesn't support astro listen up ok? (Especially the 2 blogs I will TRY and tag who I've been going back and forth with)

(THIS IS EDITTED I HAVE CHANGED MY OPINION)

I have changed my opinion on astro, after seeing more stuff and proof on astro abt the sexual harrasment I am grossed out and no one deserves that and it's gross. I do not support them ANYMORE I did at first tho which is what my other posts where abt. I still stand on being an anti endo ok? I understand spiritual practices can cause something like being a system or stuff that's non traumagenic but if you call yourself a system (did, osdd, p-did) as an endo and say it was formed not due to trauma is not real, you aren't a real system due to those disorders being formed due to CHILDHOOD trauma it cannot be formed not due to trauma. I'm sorry I had said most people I saw faking a disorder were afab, it's just a fact I have seen and stand by however I was not judging them based on that I usually judge people on how nice they are to a person or their vibe I was just stating and no I was not guessing they were afab I was going off what I saw on what they said on their accs not assuming. Astro is weird I will admit that and have unfollowed them I no longer support them due to those claims and evidence. Thank you for ur time. Have a good day. I will try and make this my last post abt astro.

( @imjustaf444keriguess , @alsoapparentlyaf444ker let me know if you don't want ur @ here I don't mind editing this.)

(Also astro if ur possibly reading this, hi! I'm (not really) sorry I stopped supporting you after defending you but you are weird with all that evidence and stuff)

[belle--ofthebrawl]

holy holy holy (Kinktober Day 4 combo: CNC/Anal)

Rating: Explicit

Relationship: Swiss/Rain, Aeon/Rain

W/c: 3.6k

Tags: Consensual Non-Consent, Consensual Kink, Anal Sex, Rough Body Play, Rough Sex, Light Sadism, Non-Consensual Spanking, degradation kink, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Cuckolding, Revenge Sex, Angry Sex, Masochism, Painplay, Slut Shaming, Consensual manipulation?? consensual unhealthy relationship dynamic?? Trans Male Character

Summary:

Their eyes meet as the first droplets of Aeon's cum start leaking out to slip hot down the inside of his thighs.

“Heya toots.” Swiss drawls, looking at Rain with heavy lidded eyes. “You look like you had fun.”

Inspired by @divine-misfortune posting about Phantom/Aeon secretly taking his condom off mid-fuck to really feel how good Rain is. Well, I thought. If Swiss is Rain's boyfriend (see: if you want to, I can play the victim) he's probably not going to be too happy about that...

Think I covered all my bases in the tags but there is no check in and no in text discussion or use of safe words. This whole thing was set up in advance and Rain is enthusiastic about his own degradation and suffering. I did my best to imply that with certain lines but please let me know if I'm missing any tags or warnings. I want people to know what they're getting into but I'm not interested in inserting any pause so the characters can have the RACK talk. This is a fantasy scene that goes perfectly with nothing wrong.

Ao3 or Below.

Rain feels guilty leaving Aeon alone, but he promised Swiss not to spend the night. Besides, he rationalizes as he quietly closes the door behind him. Aeon had practically fallen asleep mid conversation. The wonders of good sex on an anxious soul.

“Fuck.” He mutters, resting against the wall and crossing his legs together. He doesn't have much time before it starts dripping out and he’s not keen on leaving an evidence trail behind on the hardwood flooring of the wing. What he needs to do is get to the showers, or even his own room and clean himself up as best he can before going to see Swiss. 

Whose room he has to pass on the way to either of those places. 

Whose door is open to show the light is still on. 

Who calls out to him as he tries to sneak past.

“Is that my sweetheart?” Swiss sounds so happy to see him. It only serves to worsen the guilt and shame twisting in his heart. “Lurking in the shadows doesn't suit you baby, come in and let me look at you.”

It's like Swiss has him enthralled in some kind of trance. Instead of telling him to wait, Rain enters his room. Shuts the door behind him and takes in the multi-ghoul lounging on his bed. He looks like he's just woken up and Rain’s heart melts at the sight of his soft smile and a sleepy expression.Their eyes meet as the first droplets of Aeon's cum start leaking out to slip hot down the inside of his thighs.

“Heya toots.” Swiss drawls, looking at Rain with heavy lidded eyes. “You look like you had fun.”

“I’m sorry,” Aeon whimpers in his mind as his hips stutter in their pace. Rain moans as a new heat begins spilling into him, so hot and thick and right. Lost to his own orgasm, he didn't notice how much wetter his cunt had gotten. If there was a single shred of sense, he put the feeling to being with a new, albeit unexpected, partner. “You just feel so good like this, just like- just like he said-”

Rain shivers. Swiss tilts his head with a lazy grin.

“Cold, honey? C’mere, let me warm you up.”

He doesn't want to let Swiss warm him up. Doesn't want his hands to go from rubbing his arms, to his chest, to between his legs; where that awful secret lies waiting to be discovered. But he's pulled by a force beyond him, something he wants to blame on pure habit and not the way Swiss’ eyes are glinting with unnatural light.

“Right where I want you.” He purrs as Rain crawls up on the bed next to him. “You were nice to him, right? Didn't bully the new kid too much?”

“Can I have a kiss?” Aeon asked. It started so innocently. A kiss as forfeit for losing, which Rain gave gladly. His kisses were easy, one of his best favors to give. And Aeon had been so sweet and shy as Rain pressed their mouths together. Aeon had certainly been kissed before but each time he acted like it was his first, color blooming on his cheeks as Rain pulled away.

“That's not encouraging me to win, you know.” He teased. “Anyone ever tell you how cute you are?”

“Psh.” Aeon replied, drawing his legs up to his chest, shifting uncomfortably. “All the time.’

“So why does it still give you a boner when I do it?” Rain smiles, laying down to get more comfortable, but more so Aeon can see the lines of his body as his clothing drapes and accentuates it. The dip of his waist, the gentle swell of his chest. Aeon seems especially entranced with the curve of his hip bone as the band of his pajama pants shifts to expose it.

“Uh.” Aeon says intelligently. “You're just…really pretty, I guess.”

“I feel as good as I look.” Rain teases, just to see the expression on his face.

“Swiss told me “ Aeon confesses and Rain throws his head back to laugh.

“Swiss likes to show off his treasures.” 

“Does he ever…I don't know, share?”

Maybe Rain shouldn't have been so surprised at what happened next. It was practically like he had asked to be taken advantage of.

“I was on my best behavior.” Rain says carefully as he falls into bed next to Swiss, who grabs him by the waist and pulls him close. Giving him no chance to wiggle away. “We played videogames. Talked about stuff.”

“Mm.” Swiss chucks the underside of his chin with a knuckle, pulls him in for a kiss. Rain shuts his eyes and prays Swiss can’t taste anything unusual as their tongue dab together, when Swiss kisses him deeper.

“You want me to leave so you can take care of that?” Rain asks with an arched eyebrow as Aeon covers his crotch and the obvious way his stiffy is poking up. “Or…I can stay and watch?”

Aeon whimpers, giving himself a squeeze. 

“Maybe…” Rain says with a lilt to his voice. “Maybe something else?’

Aeon looks at him with wide, innocent eyes and for the first time in his life, Rain understands what drew Swiss to him, all those years ago.

“There's my gorgeous Rainy baby.” Swiss says as Rain peels his clothes off without a second thought. “Never understood how anyone could look at you and think you had to be clothed all the time. Should keep you naked for everyone to look at and no one to touch.”

Rain watches from somewhere outside himself as Swiss' hands trail down his stomach, ticklish and feather light. 

“Wet for me already?” He laughs but the amusement leaves his eyes as he strokes between Rain’s folds to where the truth of his betrayal lies. His smile falls, face hardening as he crudely shoves two fingers inside, jostling Rain and making him yelp as Swiss scrapes against the walls of his cunt and withdraws. When he holds his fingers up in the light, Rain can't look at them.

He's adorable in his desperation to fuck Rain. So unused to the feeling of a warm and welcoming cunt around his cock instead of his own hand and some lotion. Fast, uncoordinated bunny humps that jostle Rain against the bed and nearly make him laugh at how single-mindedly Aeon is chasing his second orgasm. 

"Slow down!" Rain says with a laugh. "Savor it, I'm not going anywhere."

"Sorry..." Aeon replies meekly. His thrusts do slow down though, dragging his cock out until it slips out. "You feel so good, Rain...I can't help myself."

If he hadn't been too busy stroking his own ego over the compliment, maybe he would have noticed the way Aeon was moving. Nervous. Shaky. Maybe he would have heard the sticky sound of the condom being taken off. Maybe he would have felt the difference when Aeon slid back in and moaned so dizzily in raw pleasure. How his cock felt, rubbing inside him unprotected.

Too late for maybes.

“You easy little slut.” Swiss says, and smacks him. Smears Aeon's cum along his cheek and lower lip before he grabs Rain’s chin and digs his fingers so hard into the skin Rain swears he can hear it breaking. A thumb forces its way into his mouth and he lets it drag his jaw open wide for Swiss to inspect. A finger prods his tongue, his teeth, going in nearly too deep but Rain’s gag reflex has long been trained into suppression. Still, it tickles the back of his throat before Swiss takes his hand out just to slap him again. 

“Gave him your mouth too?” Swiss sneers. “You could have hidden that bruise if you hadn't been too damn lazy to clean yourself up before crawling back to me.”

Aeon had been meaner than Rain expected, pulling him by the hair to hold him still as his hips bucked frantically. Rain was out of his depth quicker than he expected, thinking he’d tease the little quintessence ghoul with his tongue longer, see how much he could take but the second Rain opened his mouth wide enough, Aeon took advantage and fed him his cock so fast it made Rain’s head spin. 

“Oh fuck, oh fuck Rain-” 

Already, he's cumming; shooting fast and hot down his throat, cramming himself in as deep as he can. Rain’s face is crushed to his hips, delicate skin scraped by his hair as Aeon holds him tight to avoid spilling a single drop. He goes limp as Aeon shakes below him and finally lets go.

“You're so good at that.” Aeon breathes reverently and despite his loss of control, Rain preens at the praise. “Can I use my mouth on you? Can I taste you too?”

Hands are already tugging his sweats down, Aeon marveling at the way he's already shiny with slick, ready to be devoured. One finger pets down the center of his folds and before Rain can even think to say no, it's curling inside and Aeon is kissing his clit with clumsy enthusiasm.

One finger turns into two and what little control Rain has over the situation is long gone by the time he automatically chokes out “Condom, use a condom” when Aeon's naked cock brushes up against his thigh.

“Right! Sorry…” Aeon says quickly, sounding embarrassed. “It's okay though, right? I can fuck you?”

Rain opens his mouth to tell Aeon it's gone too far. He promised Swiss as long as they were together, no one else could have Rain’s body like that. But Aeon looks so hopeful as he uses one hand to hold the little foil packet to his mouth, carefully tearing it open with his teeth while the other tugs at his soft cock. The sight is so endearing and so different from how Swiss usually treats him. Bullying his way between Rain’s thighs and taking what he wanted. Aeon looked so helpless and sweet, even as his eyes fluttered shut from the pleasure of his own hand. What would his face look like when he slipped inside for the first time? And if he wore a condom, then…then it would be fine, right? Just like a toy. The small little dildo Swiss bought to see him blush at the sight of it.

And now here he was underneath someone else.

Excuses. Too much time thinking up the excuses and not enough time telling Aeon to back off because his cock is hard now, he's rolling the condom on with shaky fingers, plucking and settling the band until it sat comfortable. Falling on top of Rain with a clumsy kiss and clumsier thrusts. Keeping Rain’s mouth so full of his tongue he can't say no to the easy way his cock makes a home of his body when he finally slips inside.

“You know when I was bragging to him, that wasn't a fucking invitation to take you for a spin.” Swiss shoves him down, man handling Rain into a suitable position for what's about to happen next. “Just let it happen, you fucking whore.” Swiss spits when Rain kicks his legs and lets out a wail as he's easily dragged in, thrown over Swiss' lap. “Too late to fight back now, Rain .”

The first spank hits so hard his ears are left ringing. It doesn't get easier from there. Swiss is angry and he's taking his fury out on Rain’s body however he wants; spanks and scratches, pinches that will no doubt leave bruises scattered on his skin. Fingers are stuffed up his cunt again, scooping out cum that he’s forced to clean off until Swiss deems him empty enough.

“You're so damn loose.” Swiss hisses. “Can you even tell how many fingers I’m using?”

Rain moans and gets a cruel twist on his nipple for the effort.

“Four.” Swiss informs him. “But you're so stupid off someone else's cock you probably can't even count that high right now.’

He's spanked again. And again and again and again until his skin is no doubt cherry red and hot enough to split and bleed if Swiss keeps it up. He might, if Rain can't find a way to distract him from the single-minded focus Swiss has on hurting him. 

“ Please-” He mewls with a tremor to his voice. It's enough give Swiss pause, his hand coming to rest gently on the burning skin of his cheeks.

“Do you have something to say for yourself?” He asks, entirely neutral. Rain’s mind is long gone to the sensation, thoughts wrapped in fuzz and slow to surface but eventually he parses out something Swiss might like to hear.

“Remind me?” He asks hesitantly. “Remind my cunt…how much it loves you?”

“Oh, honey.” Swiss says kindly. “I think you're too stretched out for me to feel anything at this point. Don't you?”

He punctuates the statement with another slap and the dam inside Rain breaks, tears quickly overfilling and spilling down his face as Swiss swats him again. He isn't losing strength or stamina; if anything, his rage only makes him stronger and every single one of Rain's tears gives him another reason to keep spanking him.

“Be grateful I don't feel like using my belt.” He warns after an eternity of pain. Rain sniffles and shakes and nods, gasping out thank yous like Swiss expects. He's hot all over, throbbing with bruises already blooming and still, he doesn't think Swiss is quite done yet. Not by the hard jut of his cock in his pants, or the strong flex it gives when Rain peers up at him through tear-damp lashes. 

“Your mouth is better off apologizing. Pussy’s all used up.” Swiss gives him a leer, one that has Rain rolling off his lap in apprehension. Crawling back as the gears turn inside his lover’s head, drawing to a swift and terrible conclusion Rain can only guess at.

“Rainy, baby.” Swiss croons and Rain freezes at the sudden, loving tone. It proves to be his downfall, as Swiss lashes out. Grabbing him by the throat, just firm enough to hold, to trap. A thumb smooths over his gills as Swiss gives him a lascivious once-over. 

“You might have something I want after all.” He drawls with a nasty smile. One that makes Rain’s heart skip a beat as his stomach sinks. Swiss is already pushing him down, caging him in with his body and Rain can't run away. Doesn't want to run away because if he does, then he thinks he'll lose Swiss forever for this accident and he can't bear the thought of sleeping alone again. 

But he's not sure if he can do what Swiss wants him to either. 

“You gave me your first everything, baby.” Swiss says softly, stroking a fingertip up Rain's cheekbone. He twines a curl around his finger until it slips off. Brushes it to the side and kisses his forehead. “First kiss, first blowjob. First real fuck instead just fingers. You were so good at all of it, weren't you? Took to it all like you were born to be a slut.”

“But I'm yours.” Rain whispers, lips numb. He has to remind Swiss that underneath all the anger he still loves Rain. That at the end of the night, Rain still returned to him. That has to count for something, right?

“Yeah.” Swiss hums. “You're mine and I turned you into a real whore, didn't I?”

Swiss kisses him on the mouth, the first kindness shown to Rain ever since his secret was discovered. Carefully, so Swiss doesn't think he's about to fight back, Rain embraces him. Holds him close as Swiss gives him his tongue. He's a much better kisser than Aeon, though maybe it's just because he knows Rain so well. His legs part willingly and Swiss moans in approval. When they part, Rain searches his face for any trace of forgiveness, any hint that his ordeal will be over soon. He just wants his Swiss back.

“Roll over.” Is the only thing Swiss says. “I'll be taking what's mine now.”

“Swiss?” Rain asks. He gets a millisecond of Swiss looking at him before he's backhanded across the face. Rain cries out as he's forced onto his stomach, Swiss tossing him around as easily as a ragdoll. Hands are clapped to his sore asscheeks, nails digging in the new bruises as he’s spread and …and inspected. 

“You look wet here too.” Swiss murmurs, petting at the tight little hole Rain hardly thinks about. “But pink. New. At least you kept one thing safe for me.”

Swiss falls silent. Rain's tail twists around itself in anxiety, his ears straining for any hint about what might happen next.

Swiss spits on his hole and it's akin to an electric shock.

“Have you ever tried…you know.” Aeon asks. He's blushing. He just took Rain for the ride of his life and he's blushing.

“Anal?” Rain asks casually, feeling so worldly and experienced over the sweet new summon and his softening cock. The high of his orgasm has yet to fade, he has yet to look between his thighs and discover the selfish thing that sweet new summon did to him. “No. Swiss pesters me for it, but I don't know. I want to save it for a special occasion.”

“No.” Rain says, louder than he expects. Fear washes over him, cold and overwhelming. “No Swiss- you can't, not there, you can't.”

Swiss is laughing by the time Rain says his name, sharp and mirthless.

“I can't?” Swiss asks lowly. “I’m not the one you should be saying no to. Remember? You're mine.”  

Swiss sits his full weight on him, letting the weight of his clothed cock rest between his cheeks as threat. He leans over, grabbing Rain by the throat again to whisper his next words close.

"You go around acting like a slut, don't get upset when I fuck you like one. Whores don't get the luxury of choice." He's given a shake to let the message sink in before Swiss has his fingers prodding his lips, wiggling inside.

“Get them nice and soaked.” Swiss tells him. “Because that’s the only lube I'm giving you. I want you to hurt tonight.”

Like he isn't already. But he obeys. There's no way out but through it. Swiss rocks against him the entire time, moaning deep in appreciation of Rain's talented tongue. Keeping his cock pressed close so Rain can't forget the reason he's doing this. He shivers when Swiss takes his fingers out and trails them down his spine. Taps at the base, then even lower. Rain stops breathing as a pad rubs over the puckered skin of his hole, smooth and easy from how wet he is. No catching. 

"Maybe you don't need it after all." Swiss says thoughtfully, almost to himself. "Or maybe I don't think you deserve even that." The fingers leave and Rain breathes again. Only to gasp as the heavy weight of Swiss' cock smacks his bare skin.

“Scream.” Swiss orders breathlessly, wedging the fat head of his cock inside Rain’s unstretched hole. “Show me some appreciation for still wanting damaged goods.”

It's shocking how easily Swiss slides in, Rain’s body greedily gulping the thick length of him down like it was all he was ever meant to do. But Rain still screams, hiding his face into the mattress as Swiss forces his way deep inside. Everything else shuts off as his mind narrows in and focuses on the burn as Swiss' cock pushes him open, wider and wider . He feels so much bigger like this, taken where Rain had never let anyone go before. His hips slam in a cruel pace, too much and too fast, the sounds of their bodies so awful and loud.

“Slow down!” Rain cries. “You’re too big, it's not going to fit!’

“I'm making it fit.” Swiss says darkly. “Stop whining. It's your own fault I'm doing this, could have just kept your damn legs shut, could have just sucked his cock and been happy but no, you had to try and sneak around-”

Rain’s crying into the mattress now, sobbing and hiccuping as Swiss fucks him harder; carving Rain up with his nails, coring him hollow with his cock, chewing him up just to spit him back out. His whole world is Swiss, as it should be. 

Swiss, breathing hot in his ear. 

Swiss, warm and heavy on top of him. 

Swiss, using Rain however he wants, putting his cock wherever he wants because at the end of the day, Rain is his to play with.

No matter how much it hurts. 

And Rain will always allow it because it means Swiss loves him.

“M sorry!” Rain gasps, turning his head to the side for a breath of fresh air. “Swiss, please stop, I’m sorry!”

“You won't let it happen again?” Swiss growls. Despite Rain’s begging, he doesn't slow down. He goes harder. Meaner. Rain’s already given up but Swiss pushes him further into the mattress, pulls all the way out to groan at the way Rain’s hole gapes for him.

“No!” Rain wails, as Swiss drives the full length of his cock into him again, turning his answer into an extended cry for mercy. It's ignored. He's pulled up by a hand grasped tight to his hair, forcing him into a brutal arch as his ass is slapped, Swiss aiming to renew his already fading handprints.

“Keep. Apologizing.” He's jerked up higher, Swiss’ cock stuffed so far up into his guts he can't even breathe. “And keep telling me to stop. It makes my cock harder. Can't you feel it, sweetheart?"

He can't feel anything else.

“What do we say?” Swiss says, all sickly sweet. He kisses a tear off Rain’s flushed cheek.

“Thank you.” He hiccups miserably, feeling his cunt clench down on nothing. His clit feels swollen and hurts worst of all with how it needs so badly to be touched. He's so close. Swiss will keep him here, dancing on the edge for ages.

“Again.”

“Thank you.”

[raleighrador]

Jedi recruitment - ontological necessity or political pragmatism?

The fact that Jedi almost exclusively recruit pre verbal children is easily one of the most controversial aspects of the Order, in universe and amongst fans.

The debate broadly centres on why they do it and what the results (for individuals and at a systemic level) are. I would argue, based on what we see in material both pre and post the Disney acquisition, that this practice is not strictly necessary and is at least as much a successful political tool that benefits the Jedi as it is anything else.

So, why do the Jedi do it (according to them/their supporters)? There are basically 2 arguments that are made: i) untrained force sensitives are dangerous to themselves & those around them and ii) The Jedi order are the only appropriate institution to train them (both practically and philosophically).

On the first - this just isn't at all clear, and the Jedi's behaviour is further evidence that this is far less of a problem than they like to imply.

So far as we know the most natively powerful force connections in the Star Wars universe are Anakin Skywalker, Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa, Rey Palpatine/Skywalker. People like Ben Solo/Kylo Renn, Mae and Osha Aniseya, Yoda, Sheev Palpatine all plausibly fit in to some kind of top 10. Anakin is probably/definitely at the top and the rest all fit in behind him.

Anakin, Luke, Leia, Rey, Ben, Osha all started training ranging from later than the Jedi ideal through to when they were full grown adults. All became powerful and dangerous (in the way that all people with super powers are), 3 of them fell to the dark side with dire consequences and 3 didn't. That is probably an argument in favour of Jedi style training if not recruitment, because their method seems to have significantly higher success rates (though not a perfect one).

It is also the wrong frame of reference. Far more interesting & insightful are all the children the Jedi DON'T recruit. There are basically 2 drivers behind these un-recruited Force sensitive children: Jedi only take children with the parents' consent & the Jedi only have jurisdiction inside the Republic.

I personally am very dubious of the claim that every child who was ever recruited by the Jedi was done so with the parents consent. For this argument I am willing to assume it is true.

Why do the Jedi only take kids with parental consent? If untrained force sensitives are so dangerous surely they should be taking all children regardless? This introduces 2 points of tension: either the Jedi don't always respect consent or they do, and the reason they do is because it isn't actually as strictly necessary to take these kids as they like to imply.

The fact that they only operate within the borders of the Republic is a second proof point. The Republic is the largest but not the only geopolitical body in the GFFA. You have Hutt space, Wild Space, the Unknown Regions, Hapes Cluster etc. If untrained force sensitives really were such a great threat that only the Jedi can handle them a) it is a very dubiously defensible for the Jedi to say "ah shucks the border is here" b) it would suggest that the other political entities would have at least some sort of co-operative agreement with the Jedi and c) you would presumably see dozens of rogue force users operating in these non-Republic spaces with grave consequences.

You don't.

I get that Force sensitives are rare but they are sufficiently common that the Jedi Order has pretty clear and constantly renewed generations. You don't ever see only a single youngling, there aren't years or decades where there are no padawans because the seekers haven't found anyone for 20 years.

So presumably - like Anakin and Rey and Mae and Osha - force sensitives are being born pretty frequently outside the Republic. They by definition aren't being found and raised by the Jedi. Yet we don't see any especially dire consequences of this.

It therefore doesn't seem at all clear that it is a necessity for the Jedi to take these children - and the Jedi's own behaviour reinforces that conclusion.

The second claim is that the Jedi - and only the Jedi - can appropriately train these children. I think there are 2 elements to "appropriately train": the first is mechanical ie the Jedi a actually know how the force works and can teach you to move rocks or whatever and the second is a question of values or philosophy ie the Jedi teach you selflessness.

Notably, the Jedi actually blend these 2. They explicitly discuss "right" and "wrong" ways to achieve the same outcome. You can find your calm centre and channel the Force dispassionately to lift a rock, you can also tap into your emotions to do so. These achieve the same output with - seemingly - the same mechanic but the Jedi consider the latter pathway dangerous and inappropriate.

On the purely mechanical - they are clearly not the only people who can teach this. We know about smaller "legitimate" Force cults (like the Guardians of the Hills, Fallanassi, Sorcers of Tund, Yacombe - notably for seeking balance between light and dark in their own practice) as well as "illegitimate" cults like the Night Sisters (it is not clear to me if the Dathomiri Night Sisters and the Brendok Coven are factions of a single group or distinct) and the Sith. They were all able to manipulate and use the Force. They were all capable of teaching these abilities to others. The nature of their abilities were not perfectly consistent - different cults could do different things, including things that members of other cults would not even recognise.

Not only were there other people out there who could use the Force and teach others to do so, they were also teaching and using techniques the Jedi didn't know or understand. So the Jedi clearly were not the only people capable of this instruction.

What they did have was an effective monopoly on legitimate instruction. All the other cults mentioned were either literally illegal (Sith), totally unofficial and unrecognised and suffered some degree of official persecution (Night Sisters), or were significantly smaller and more localised than the Jedi. None enjoyed "official" status or the backing of the largest government in the GFFA like the Jedi.

On the question of values or philosophy it is clear that the Jedi don't have a monopoly on selflessness or being a good person. Nor is it evident that the very specific Jedi interpretation of "goodness" is the only tool (or even a necessary tool) to prevent Force users from becoming dangerous.

The evidence for this is the fact that with the exception of the Sith, none of the above cults seem to ever have posed some kind of meaningful or sustained threat to peace or stability in the GFFA. There have been individual members who have done bad, even monstrous things, but there is nothing inherent in their philosophy that makes them or their use of the Force dangerous.

Equally, it is worth coming back to the prior point that the Jedi have - throughout history - been the single most common source of Sith. In fact they seem to be the only one of these cults that has any record of inadvertently being a source for future Sith. That is to say - all Sith seem to either be raised from "birth"/only ever been trained by other Sith (like Maul, or Palpatine) or to be former Jedi.

So we are now in a place where i) untrained Force sensitives don't actually pose some kind of existential threat ii) the Jedi are not the only people capable of providing technical instruction in using the Force and iii) there is nothing particular about Jedi teachings that makes them especially resistant to the dark side in general and Sith in particular. If anything, they seem more likely to inadvertently produce future Sith than the other cults.

A small diversion to explore what it is the Jedi seek to teach and how: Attachment is bad.

I would argue the Jedi restrictions on emotion are significantly more extensive than that. It is functionally all forms of love or affection that they are opposed to or at least very disapproving of. Equally they don't seem to have much room for other emotions. Certainly not anger but not even grief or sadness. These latter 2 are in many ways the most illustrative - there is Yoda's advice that Anakin rejoice for those who transform into the Force; and in the Acolyte we got Jecki's "It's always an honour to witness anything or anyone transform into the Force".

That is bizarre as hell. Always? It is always an honour? This is the instinctive rote response to "I feel very bad for getting that animal killed"?

I am not saying that Yoda and Jecki and the Jedi teachings are completely wrong. I am saying that they don't sound like they make room for the full gamut of emotions. They don't teach "feel sad, own it, acknowledge it, process it, and let it go". They teach "don't be sad".

That is not a very helpful philosophy. It just doesn't engage with the reality that emotions are totally natural and largely unavoidable functions of human (and presumably in GFFA other sapient) physiology.

It presumably has more to it than I am acknowledging but either way it doesn't seem especially compelling. Why can't this be taught (consistently successfully) to adults? I would have reservations about ANY philosophy that openly explained that it basically only works on children who have no competing frame of reference or adults who have lost all their friends and family. That is deeply suspicious.

Even if it isn't the philosophy itself per se it says nothing good about the pedagogical methods of the Jedi.

The other consideration here is that the sensible bits of the philosophy are pretty shallow - and not at all unique to the Jedi. Especially in fandom when basically any "bad decision" by a Jedi or other Force user is explained by "oh ho they're thinking with their emotions and attachments" while "good decisions" are "Jedi-like" and must come from a place of detachment.

2 examples - Shmi's decision to let Anakin go with the Jedi is often described as "Jedi like" and demonstrates a lack of selfish attachment that Anakin would have done well to emulate. This is nonsensical for a number of reasons, not least of which being that Shmi had literally zero agency in this situation. She isn't make a real, informed choice either way. More than that, the alternative is "my child stays a slave'. Many parents all over the world (and presumably the GFFA) make sacrifices for the good of their children all the time. So these relationships clearly don't preclude someone being selfless or "unattached" as the Jedi define. Yet it remains the most commonly prohibited relationship by the Jedi. It is explicitly the one relationship they are guaranteed to prohibit for every one of their members. Mother Aniseya in the Acolyte is another example - I think her decision making around Osha is bonkers. However it is held up as selfless and unattached that it is her who chooses to let Osha go with the Jedi, and everyone else who ruins it by being attached. What is missed though is WHY she makes that decision. "I choose Mother". It is expressly in choosing to prioritise her familial relationship with Osha over her political one with the Coven that she "let's go" of Osha.

So not only do you not need to be a Jedi to make these sorts of decisions and learn these lessons, you definitely don't need to be isolated from familial relationships.

I would argue an even more interesting example from the Acolyte is Mae. In the season finale she is the only one who comes at all close to some kind of "Jedi like" decisions. She doesn't want revenge, she wants Sol to confess his crimes and face systemic justice. This from a girl whose life was ruined by the Jedi and then at some point she got found and trained by the "Sith" (I am not sold Qimir is a de jure Sith but I digress).

She was almost as far from a Jedi as possible but still came to the "Jedi like" decision. There are also lots of people with less extreme background who do the same.

So what gives? What is so special about Jedi training? I would suggest that from the perspective of teaching people the technical skills to use the force and the values to not abuse it... not much.

Certainly not enough to warrant a state backed effective monopoly that empowers you to test any child you wish and take the vast majority of them.

Even if you accept that the Jedi (and other Force cults) are right that only the Light Side can be safely used, the Jedi are not the only people who believe or teach that. So why do they deserve to be the only ones allowed to (en masse) recruit and train children?

So why then do the Jedi do it and why do the Republic allow them to do it? To me it seems much more about maintaining a monopoly on legitimate violence and use of the Force.

What taking children in early and separating them from their family, denying them any material possessions outside of their role in the Order, does is ensure they are loyal to you and don't have any other options.

The extent to which people are free to leave - formally and practically - seems very limited. In the thousands of years of the Order's written records, only 20 Masters have left. Even if we assume (eg per the Acolyte and TCW) that more non-masters have left, it remains a very small number. The practical limitations seem most pertinent - as per Osha, as well as our own observations - being raised a Jedi just doesn't prepare you to do anything except be a Jedi. Add that to the lack of network or resources outside the Order (as well as eg material threats of slavery because people want access to Force sensitives), and it becomes very difficult to leave willingly.

@redrikki has written compelling on this but the Jedi are demonstrably a cult. A significant element of that is the concentration of political, material, and in Star Wars metaphysical power.

Specifically recruiting and isolating and raising children serves the Jedi's aims of i) ensuring their ongoing hegemony and ii) is a mechanism for preventing or suppressing conflict. You simply diminish the number of people who can actually enter into conflict with you because you do your best to ensure they're all working for you. This is plausibly at least partially noble - you head off any conflicts that might require your intervention.

That nobility is thinned by the earlier discussion because it begs the question of what kind of conflict are the Jedi preventing (or gearing up to fight)?

Let us be clear - the Sith are a toxic, destructive ideology that should be opposed. Their philosophy is self-serving and violent. They are quite literal evil.

I just don't think their existence justified the children taking and isolating as many children as they can. This is especially true in the 1000 years leading up to the Prequels. As far as the Jedi believed, there were no Sith. So not even the Jedi were using the Sith - and any conflict with them, which I would say is a justified conflict - as the justification for the policy.

What kind of conflicts were they therefore seeking to prevent? I would suggest they were attempting to avoid any conflict over resources or support or legitimacy with other smaller Force cults. Even worse, I think they were avoiding a scenario where it became plausible to argue that the Jedi weren't necessary at all.

In a world where the Jedi are not actively recruiting children I would imagine 2 things happen: other Force cults become larger and more prominent, sufficiently large to start exerting political influence. This is not necessarily counter to the Jedi or a threat but it is also not necessary aligned with the Jedi. Even if not malicious, it would be a different set of priorities and a different set of philosophies that the Jedi (and the Republic writ large) would need to engage with.

These cults are different to each other and the Jedi. They by definition do not agree on all/some of the mechanics of the Force, the values and philosophies that govern it, its appropriate use, and the role of Force sensitives in the Galaxy. If they were perfectly aligned they wouldn't be distinct cults. These different groups operating in the galaxy, recruiting, preaching, proselytising pose a necessary risk (or at least complication) to the Jedi's role.

At minimum it likely results in someone somewhere asking "what is up with all these cults? Are they all Jedi? Do they all get the same rights and privileges?" and this opens up a series of conversations as to which groups get what and why. In a broadly pluralist context, as the Republic seems to be, it isn't clear to me that you could neatly draw that out in a way that is clear and practicable to the Senate.

If they do start actively behaving or advocating in ways that are counter to the Jedi's interests, it is unclear how the Jedi could respond. Let's assume the Jedi have the best interest of the Republic at heart. Let's assume the other groups do too (or at least are willing to say they are, even if self-serving). How would these disagreements get resolved in a way that is systemically defensible and legitimate in the eyes of the galaxy? "The Force says so" is not really an option when both parties can legitimately use it.

It is far simpler for the Jedi to just head this off by ensuring these other cults remain small, or at least the Jedi remain significantly larger and more wide spread.

The other thing that happens if the Jedi don't have a near monopoly on force sensitive kids, is many of these kids grow up... basically fine. Sure they're lucky and fast and good at telling when people are lying, and probably crazy good at Space Baseball and whatever, but they don't pose any kind of major threat to the galaxy. Based on what we have seen, and the lack of rogue force sensitives going on rampages outside the Republic, this seems like the most likely outcome.

How do the Jedi justify themselves to the Senate then? How do they maintain their independence and status if you've got non-Jedi force sensitives running for office or serving in the diplomatic corp? Non-Jedi force sensitives in the policing and security services?

A significant element of the Jedi's status and privilege is that they are legitimately very, very good at things. The Force does make you better at discerning the truth, reading people, sensing the long term outcomes of decisions, combat etc. It makes the Jedi significant assets.

They're also a mysterious and poorly understood religious order. For historical reasons this has been tolerated, and the Jedi have justified their ongoing independence through effectiveness and lack of alternatives.

Lots of non-Jedi Force sensitives, with access to non-Jedi teachers who can still teach them the mechanics of the Force, severely challenges that status.

Again this is not a wholly or even mostly nefarious concern for the Jedi to have. In the same way that more planets/entities having independent militarised security forces ala the Trade Federation might be a challenge to stability, having more (potentially militarised) Force sensitives has a risk. However, the policy of Jedi monopoly on recruitment is only one way of managing that risk, and it is a way that simultaneously cements their position in the Republic.

Importantly - this also all suits the Republic itself. While I am sure some people want their own Force sensitive armies, no one wants someone else to have them. I also imagine no one is excited about having to fund a second or third mysterious religion filled with (potentially) super powered warrior diplomats. No one wants more competing interests and jurisdictional debates etc.

So I don't think this is an example of the Jedi somehow tricking the Republic or behaving deceitfully or doing anything except their very best to do what they think is right.

That just doesn't mean this isn't a political policy.

[mindblowingscience]

Researchers have found evidence that wild savannah elephants in Kenya label each other with specific vocal sounds, which they then use to communicate. The research is not yet peer-reviewed, but if the results can be verified and reproduced, it would make elephants the only known non-human animal to communicate with random names. Bottlenose dolphins can also call to certain individuals by imitating their unique signature whistles, but scientists say this is slightly different from what we humans do. Our names aren't usually based on imitations of unique noises we make ourselves (like Pikachu), but are generally reflections of something more abstract and less tangible, buried in cultural practices and values. It is this arbitrary nature of human naming that now seems to apply to elephants, too.

Continue Reading

[sh0tanzz]

hii can u do sohee as bf?

SOHEE AS YOUR BF based on astrology ~

reminder: this is for fun and astrology is smth I study for a hobby, these are all inferences based off of observations and not exact fact unless I knew him myself !!

Scorpio Sun: The stereotype that scorpios suns are secretive is so played out they're just technically shy imo im sorry LMFAOOO. Once a scorpio fully trusts you or has something they genuinely want to tell you they just keep GOING. And the same probably applies to him especially since his Mercury is in Sag. In the beginning he might seem hard to crack or not one to spare many details but once he's sure of you and you two are officially together and solidified oh he's a plain open book. Ofc he's not gonna pour every aspect of his heart out but being secretive really won't be an issue. He has an aspect of sun and uranus so he won't really act in ways that aren't true to him, his freedom, or expression so he'd practice authenticity even within the relationship so you better be in it for the real him !!

Libra Moon: Similar to Wonbin he'd be pretty considerate and would weigh pros and cons before doing anything to ensure fairness. His chart makes up of placements centered around truth, fairness and morals so ngl being equal+in balance is something he'd want for the relationship. Sometimes there's a tendency for Libra moons to end up complacent or non argumentative to keep the peace but I think it wouldn't be as severe considering his sag placements. Rather than being complacent he'd be pretty passive, he'd be willing to engage in trivial debates and significant convos but wouldn't break his neck to prove his point or show that he's right unless it was absolutely necessary. His moon is sextile his venus so emotional balance is crucial so he'd avoid constant disturbances in the relationship so you two remain in harmony; downside he might become TOO passive and too invested in harmony to where needed conflicts are dismissed or he doesn't express himself fully.

Sagittarius Mercury: So...blunt LMFAOO. Honestly Sohee probably says crazy stuff or is more sassy behind closed doors he has sm mercury aspects even some with pluto and mars. He might be conflicted sometimes, has moments of being super blunt and even saying stuff without thinking and then his libra moon brings him back into peaceful mode and he's like "uuuhm my bad". Probably likes fake arguing or small debates. Makes fun of you most definitely but compared to Eunseok it'd be easy for him to apologize if he realized it was too far or hurt you. Instead of yelling he might talk pretty fast and "word vomit" whenever he's dealing with big emotions or anger (especially with his mercury square mars) and due to this he might go quiet during arguments (if they ever even happen) because he knows when dealing with his outbursts he could say the wrong thing or be hurtful when not meaning to. Likes to be playful and even a bit nonserious and childish in convos and tries to make things lighthearted.

Sagittarius Venus: Sigh omg a bestfriend and boyfriend in one quite LITERALLY. Sag Venus has a hard time settling down because they value their freedom and life path so much and they don't really get into -serious- relationships unless they're genuinely enamored with you and can see you fitting into their expanding life. So once he's with you and realizes he's actually in love with you and it's beyond just flirting and pining he's essentially all in. Freedom will be evident in the relationship and there may not be a super specific power dynamic laid out outside of the cheesy "look at how my gf takes care of me.”. He wouldn't abandon his career for the relationship but wouldn't completely abandon the relationship as a whole either but just know there'd be an attempt to split both. He'd be loving and wouldn't be too restricting, flirts via jokes quite literally he would end up being the funniest man you know especially with that sag mercury on top. He values optimism and change and would implement that into the relationship as well.

Pisces Mars: His Sag Venus paired with his mars could show that he'd be ok with someone being the initiator or taking the lead but would still be ok with wanting your attention and doing things to get it (not in a toxic way ofc) . Like he'd want to impress you with unconventionally/casual romantic things or "best friend dates" that soon lead to more. Aw man he's probably a friends to lovers trope type of man like anton :((. Tbh him having a Sag Venus + Pisces Mars such a chill relationship like I said earlier it'd be just like dating your friend.

[arcanarix]

Fated Divergence Ch.4 // Yandere! Suguru Geto X Non-Sorcerer Darling

AO3 (+previous chapter)

CW // coerced oral scene (fem receiving), death, kidnapping (time for "The Cage" :3)

Word Count: 7.2K

Activity quieted down for a while, and Satoru paused mid-text, his thumb hovering over the send button to his text thread with you. The exhaustion in your voice from his last call ought to be indication enough that he should leave you alone. He slammed the backspace button, choosing to let you breathe as you adjusted to the weight of your world and the current position Suguru Geto placed you in; he needn’t complicate things further. Satoru remembered the determined look on your face when he met you at the clinic, how the way you handled your patients differed so greatly from the victims of cursed spirits he exorcised on the daily. He knew you worked in a place of science and certainty, a world built on concrete evidence and fact; something which the world of jujutsu sorcery possessed little value.

As Satoru ambled down the bustling streets of the district of Shibuya, he envied the oblivious faces of the public. To humans, curses were myths, Japanese folklore and nothing beyond that. Silly stories to scare children over campfires. But for someone like him, curses were a very real thing.

Satoru found himself bouncing back, lingering over your words, your honesty. In his world where gratitude was practically a luxury he didn’t know, your understanding felt like a breath of fresh air. He still scanned over the already long text thread, treating each message you sent him like little priceless trinkets he kept to himself, that he’d protect with his life and his heart. While you might have long forgotten about these interactions, he revisited them often; your messages to him felt like a warm embrace from a lover on his lonelier nights.

Which, for someone like him, he pondered further as he flash backed to the long-gone days of his youth, where Suguru’s concern had once been a constant presence in his life, now disappeared? Lonely nights were a common occurrence.

With the students dispatched on missions far from Japan, Satoru’s thoughts kept circling back to you in his free time. Something about you just didn’t quite add up, like a mis-solved derivative…Suguru’s desire for you only added to the confusion. Did anything ever make sense in the world of jujutsu, and in Geto’s mind? Satoru smirked at the absurdity of the thought; why entertain it at all? Seeking answers in Suguru’s lack of logic was like defying gravity. Nothing about Suguru’s interest in you made sense based on prior and current knowledge of his ‘true’ feelings toward humanity.

Nothing beyond, perhaps, personal interest which may have little to do with Suguru’s ‘grand plan,’ which was subpar, at best. And the curse user was likely aware of such odds being against him.

There had to be a point to what Suguru ever did, at any time. Satoru just didn’t figure that out yet.

The sky blushed with soft, glowing hues of orange and pink, and a soft breeze rushed through Satoru’s hair, grounding him in the present moment in spite of the onslaught of tumultuous, torturous thoughts storming just beneath the surface. It reminded him that he was safe, that he was okay.

For the moment, at least.

He wished it was someone holding him and comforting instead of relying on nature.

His thoughts drifted to the idea of you doing that for him, and he squashed the notion the moment it manifested in his mind. Satoru’s hand twitched toward his phone which he had already stashed in his back pocket, having half a mind to text you again like a desperate teenaged boy trying to court his first girlfriend. But he relented, challenging his self control. He wished to protect you, not to pursue you.

He focused on the walk, intent on seeking clarity and not more confusion and conflict, inhaling the fresh air, observing the people walking past him and the array of colors dusted across the evening sky.

Satoru exhaled, slow and steady, quelling the raging storm in his mind. His line of duty demanded mental sharpness, mental acuity, to focus on the real threats ahead, and not just on the possibilities.

He paused for a moment, his electrifying sky blue gaze sweeping over the bustling streets, swarmed with the enviable, ordinary lives unfolding around him.

But his mind kept pulling back to you. The way you remained dutiful, stern, unyielding. The way you carried yourself with an air of unwavering confidence. The way you seemed genuine with him, from the few interactions he had with you. He already loved the way you laughed, that little, innocent giggle, like you were still an innocent girl who hadn’t been torn apart by the world’s atrocities.

Satoru clenched his fists until his knuckles whitened, a flash of irritation across his eyes at the way he kept thinking about you when he should be focused on other matters. More important, pressing matters. You were already in danger just being in Suguru’s radar. The last thing you needed in your life was him complicated things further with these feelings for you that just kept festering the longer he fought them.

Satoru straightened himself, brushing off his intrusive thoughts. He often prided himself on his self-control, on being above such distractions which were only a privilege for the youth.

Or so he convinced himself…

Satoru strolled down the block, hands stuffed in his pockets, easily sidestepping passersby while pondering his choices. Not realizing he drifted so deep in his thoughts, he brushed past the face of the man he hoped not to see any time soon.

But then again, Satoru thought upon further reflection as he met Suguru’s piercing violet gaze, his senses even picking up on that natural musk of his, maybe he needed to confront him right then and there.

“Satoru! Long time no see! What a pleasant surprise,” Suguru greeted, with Nanako and Mimiko in tow. “I just had to take these two to the hospital. Those girls love their sweets so much that they got food poisoning.”

“Geto!” Nanako pouted at being called out like that! Suguru patted her head, and she eyed him beadily.

Satoru didn’t seem all that interested in their antics, more just on Suguru, and what the hell was happening? What the hell did he want?

“Do you not have proper medics in that fancy temple of yours, Suguru? Not even a sorcerer with Reverse Cursed Technique?” Satoru inquired in a suspicious tone, without turning to look at him. “With how averse you are to non-sorcerers, I didn’t think you’d even bother going to human-ran hospitals even if your girls were on the brink of death.”

“Ah, I suppose all of these monkeys serve their purposes one way or another,” Suguru replied with a dismissive wave over his shoulder, before examining his nails. “Especially that one nurse—oh, yes, the one you’ve met as well! The girls seem to like her very much. Isn’t that right?”

“Is she going to come visit us?” Mimiko asked, who, in spite of her monotone voice, still seemed excited at the prospect of Geto having someone around, and someone she could bond with—another womanly figure around her and Nanako would be a strong positive influence on them both.

“We’ll make arrangements for her visit,” Suguru assured her with his classic, charming smile, that smile which beneath it hid nothing but malice and disdain for the rest of your kind—yet another unusual twist of events Satoru couldn’t solve just yet. “She cannot refuse the offer.”

“What are you planning with her?” Satoru demanded a straight answer—one he knew better than to expect from Suguru. “She’s not a sorcerer.”

Suguru’s lips curled into a sneer, his violet eyes narrowing into slits as he locked onto Satoru—a warning flashing in that gaze.

“It’s none of your concern, Satoru. Mustn’t you give it a rest?”

Satoru frowned, loosening his blindfold to reveal his brilliantly sky blue eyes, rivaling nature’s blue sky itself.

Deciding now than never, he confronted the curse user.

“So you sensed it with her, too, huh?” he queried, perceptive as ever.

Suguru’s jaw dropped, his face darkening, but he should have known. Of course Satoru would know why he became so intrigued by her aura, her essence, the power lying dormant within her. Why did he expect anything different? He was Satoru Gojo.

“Yes, I did. Something about her…a power I cannot even begin to explain or to quantify…” Suguru mused as he tapped his chin in thought. Even Nanako and Mimiko peered up at Geto with curiosity shimmering in their eyes before they exchanged a glance with each other. “Not even your Six Eyes can determine what that power is?”

Gojo inhaled sharply, biting back a smart retort, because that wasn’t going to solve anything in that moment.

“She doesn’t have anything that points to her potentially being a sorcerer,” Satoru responded as his eyes studied Suguru. “It still doesn’t explain why you’re so keen on spiriting her away.”

“That’s for me to know,” he quipped as he adjusted his robe. “Well, I would love to stay and chat, but these girls are eager to return home after an unprecedented hospital stay. You understand?”

Suguru was just about to brush past the man with Six Eyes, and then—

“—One more thing,” Satoru began as he rested a hand on his shoulder, stopping Suguru from retreating too quickly. “Did you latch those curses onto her?”

Suguru grinned until his face cracked, his eyes gleaming with a dark, unspoken vow.

“I did,” he purred, making Satoru’s hairs stand on end, huddling the twins close to him. “As long as it brings her closer to me.”

Shaking his head, Satoru sighed, the implications of Suguru’s words gnawing at his gut.

“I can’t believe you.”

“It won’t happen again!” Suguru lied right through his teeth while placing a hand over his heart for theatrics’ sake.

Perhaps he hosted far too many of those faux sermons on live television…

“It’s not too late to just walk away from this now,” Satoru suggested with a shrug. “She doesn’t seem to hold much regard for you.”

Suguru shot another glare, but refrained from commenting.

Smart, Satoru mused to himself, tightening his blindfold once again. He only smirked at Suguru, who scoffed back.

Satoru, as undeterred as ever, adjusted his composure, preparing to leave, not before giving Suguru a final once over.

He gestured to the Buddhist monk fit.

“You seriously go around in that as a disguise?”

“Of course,” he replied as he ushered the girls to follow him. “I must sell the persona to these monkeys somehow, and they love over-the-top spectacles.”

As they walked away, Nanako climbed up on Geto, murmuring, “Do you think she likes playing Mario Kart or watching Lord of the Rings?”

“Perhaps,” Satoru heard Geto respond before their voices faded with the crowd. “You can find out soon, my love.”

Shaking his head, he continued his solo stroll, just as the horizon swallowed the last sliver of sunlight, leaving behind a myriad of stars across deep indigo hues. He needed a drink, something to dull that growing sense of unease which threatened to consume him.

-- -- -- -- --

Meanwhile, across town, you and Mei found yourselves at your usual spot, the pub that had become your haven for venting and unwinding after grueling shifts. You two poured your guts out to each other over cheap sushi and drinks, as per tradition since your college days together. Mei droned on and on about how she loathed the dating scene and how she couldn’t seem to get past the talking stage anymore with men, and you pointed out how that was the last thing on your mind with how stressful work could be. You both found common ground in that men were the least of your concerns, but that didn’t stop Mei from inquiring constantly about the two new men who entered your life, particularly Gojo.

“So, what’s the story with blindfold guy?” Mei inquired as she chewed on salmon sashimi.

Shockingly this restaurant remained open at such an ungodly hour, and you loved coming here after trying shifts. And after these past weeks…

Ugh. You wanted to drown it all out and forget about it, think ahead and about the future. You always did that and it always helped, especially when you believed you were about to go so far off the deep end…the stress life brought could be so meaningless, at times.

“He’s nice,” you replied, idly sipping on your martini. “Sorry I can’t give much else about the guy. I don’t know much about him except his weird sleep schedule.”

“We’re no strangers to that,” Mei snickered as she brought her glass to her lips. You also snorted.

“No kidding.” Your eyes twinkled upon recognizing a figure over Mei’s shoulder. “Well speak of the damn devil…”

Mei tilted her head, quirking an eyebrow at your statement. “Is blindfold guy here?”

You pointed somewhere above her shoulder.

“Yeah, by the bar. Turn around, but don’t be obvious!”

Leave it to Mei to be discreet! Mei had always been a real one!

Her eyebrows flashed as she got a good eyeful of Satoru. Yes, even you conceded to the fact that Satoru was objectively a handsome man, and this was the first time you saw him with his blindfold off. He, like anyone else, probably just wanted to forget about this week’s trials and tribulations.

You heard Mei sigh dreamily and you couldn’t help but chuckle. Still, you agreed with Mei. Those were the deepest, electrifyingly blue eyes you’ve ever seen in your life.

She whistled to herself as she continued to ogle him. “That is one fine piece of ass and you’re saying you don’t want that in your bed?”

“I’m not thinking about that right now, Mei!” you whispered in a harsher tone than intended. You calmed yourself down as you continued. “Besides, I seem to be more of a charity case for him right now.”

Mei seemed confused at that bit for a moment, before the realization dawned on her.

“Is it that whole thing with Geto? I didn’t even know those twin girls were his,” she remarked, “I was just as shocked as you were.”

You shrugged, stabbing your fork into some steak. “It wasn’t like they took his last name. And you weren’t on shift when they were admitted, right? That’s not your fault.”

Mei gave you a blank stare, pausing before continuing.

“That’s the weird thing, actually,” she pointed out as she tried to recall the details of this week. “I didn’t see their names in the roster unless the person before me forgot.”

You blinked, dumbfounded by that new bit of information. You then remembered how Asuka died tragically just before the girls were admitted, and you couldn’t help but think the worst…but instead of entertaining that thought, you put it behind you, thinking that would be something to address to Gojo once he sobered himself up.  

“That’s really weird,” you stated, that same churning feeling in your stomach bouncing back. You tried to ignore it—you wanted to enjoy a nice dinner with your friend, one of the few luxuries you could afford in this lifetime.

She nodded, sipping most of her drink until it was nearly empty and setting it back on the coster. “No kiddin’.” She saw something in the corners of her eyes and her eyes twinkled in that classic mischievous, Mei way. “Hey, someone’s on his way to chat it up with your sexy ass.”

“Mei,” you groaned as you felt heat rushing to your cheeks at the mere thought. Why you were behaving like a young schoolgirl all of a sudden, you hadn’t the slightest idea, yet here you were! Completely blindsided by the fact that someone like Satoru Gojo wanted to know you at all…

“Fancy seeing you here this time of night,” Gojo greeted with a smug grin, flashing his eyebrows at you. Before you responded, he gestured to Mei, extending his hand toward her. “Who’s this?”

“Hi! Mei Sato,” she introduced herself, returning his offer for a handshake. “We work together but I just work at the front desk.”

“Hey, no need to sell yourself short here. It’s a pleasure, Sato. I’m Satoru Gojo.”

Gojo leaned closer to you, and you could smell a faint hint of alcohol, perhaps he seemed like a whiskey kind of guy judging by how pungent the scent off of his breath was…? You tried not to seem to put off (not like you weren’t drinking tonight either, likely not as much as he was though), but nobody ever truly liked the smell of alcohol, did they?

“Geto hasn’t given you much trouble since we last spoke, yeah?” he asked, tone laced in curiosity and slightly slurred, indicating he might’ve had a bit too much tonight for his own good. You tried to ignore that part, focusing on the conversation rather than his drunken state.

You shook your head, offering a small smile as if to reassure him. “I haven’t heard from him since he took his girls home.”

You froze as Gojo patted your head, his touch tender and affectionate and completely out of left field for you. From the corner of your eye, Mei shot you a knowing look with a grin of her own, making a sucking-off motion with her hand and mouth and you wanted to tell her off right then and there!

“Good,” Gojo replied, keeping his hand on the crown of your head for longer than necessary. “He really is bad news and has a few screws loose. Take it from someone who knew him well.”

You exchanged a glance with Mei, whose jaw dropped at that plot twist. That was…a revelation if you ever had one.

“Stay out of trouble, ‘kay?” he saluted you before twisting on his heel. Not before bidding farewell to Mei out of decency, but he didn’t seem that interested in her more than you.

Mei covered her mouth from his view and mouthed, “How drunk is that guy?”

“Might be a lightweight,” you mouthed back.

“Shoko!” You both jumped as you heard Gojo yell giddily at a friend, perhaps. A very beautiful red-haired woman who seemed too absorbed in her own world to care about Gojo. “Just the girl I wanted to see! What a sight for sore eyes!”

“How many have you had already, Gojo?” ‘Shoko’ seemed beyond fed up with Gojo’s antics, in the middle of lighting a cigarette. “I thought you swore off alcohol.”

You and Mei giggled at the exchange.

“Alright, I’m stuffed. We should head home. You going to be alright?” Mei asked.

You smiled. “Of course. I’m happy having friends like you.”

“Hey, we’re sisters forever and don’t you forget it,” Mei replied with a smile. Before she could pay the check, you swiped it from her and gave the waitress who came by your credit card instead. She gawked, glaring, and you stuck your tongue out playfully.

“Can’t let you spoil me all the time,” you teased with a wink. “Seriously, thank you, Mei. I don’t know where I’d be if I didn’t have a friend like you to keep me in line.”

Mei smiled, clearly taken aback by the sincerity of your tone. “Always, girl. You do the same for me. You’re practically my rock, you know.”

“GOJO! GET YOUR GRUBBY GROSS HANDS AWAY FROM ME!” You both heard a woman shriek and you guys both glanced in his direction. Now he seemed to be bugging a woman with long black hair.

“Utahime~! You’re so easy to rile up,” he laughed as he towered over the girl, “You gonna cry again you wittle baby?”

“NO! AND I AM OLDER THAN YOU DAMMIT! You’re such a piece of shit!”

The two looked like they were going to face off.

“Oh God,” Shoko sighed, burying her head in her hand.

“You’re not going to win a husband with that attitude,” Gojo teased with a wag of his finger.

You shook your head. “Gojo’s still a man, I guess.”

“Yep,” Mei conceded as she watched the scene unfold with you. “Shall we be off?”

When you paused in front of your apartment door, you froze upon seeing a box addressed to you.

‘Sweets for my sweet little lamb.

-Suguru Geto’

You snapped a photo of this and sent it to Gojo, who, might not be able to have a proper response until after he treated that killer hangover he would definitely have tomorrow morning.

True to your nature, your inclination to be curious got the better of you and you decided to open the box, only to find more, smaller boxes. Each came with a slip of paper taped to the back explaining its contents. Sweets from different corners of the world, Suguru claimed in the first main slip of paper, and some remark about how humans scrambled for sweets the same way monkeys scrambled for their bananas, which had you raise an eyebrow. You opened some other boxes, which contained expensive jewelry. You weren’t an expert, but given Geto’s status, these were certainly real jewels, diamonds, pearls, gold…and you were pondering selling them to the nearest pawn shop for quick money.

The box on the bottom caught your eye, especially with what the note attached to it stated.

‘I met with one of your patients…the night the twins got admitted.’

At that moment, your blood ran cold as the worst of your thoughts swam like schools of krill away from a whale in your mind. Asuka…Asuka, that poor defenseless girl, he didn’t mean her, did he? Did he have something to do with her dying so suddenly? With trembling hands, you pried open the lid of the thinner black box, to find—

--you shrieked, face gone as blank as a canvas; your worst nightmare realized. This man held little regard for the lives of others.

The blood-soaked teddy-bear Asuka cradled her entire stay. The one you bought for her as a token of comfort. You remembered the way Asuka’s tiny hands clutched this very pink teddy bear during those endless chemo sessions, her pale, tired face lightening up only when you waltzed in to treat her an comfort her or to tell her the latest gossip of her favorite Korean Pop band to distract her from the pain.

While nothing about this particular teddy bear stood out, you just picked it up from the souvenir shop attached to the hospital; the only thing remarkable about it was that you made sure it was pink, Asuka’s favorite color…now it was completely stained red in her blood.

Another note had been attached in a ribbon, also stained with her blood. Your trembling hands held it, as you tried to make out what it said.

‘Do consider a stay in the temple if you wish no more harm to come to your patients…or your colleagues.’

That sick son of a bitch!

She didn’t deserve that!

She was an innocent, young girl! She barely got to live a life!

Only caught in the crossfire between you and a madman.

You tried to quell your tears, as a presence approached you. Sniffling, you glanced up to meet the electric blue eyes of Satoru Gojo.

“You sober up quick,” you observed, attempting to wipe away the now dried blood on your hands on your clothes, which had you wince.

Gojo’s typical smug expression faded as he gazed upon you with those sky blue eyes, at your tear-stained face, his lips pursed.

“I came here as soon as I got your text.”

“How did you know where I—?” You paused, reconsidering that question. “Don’t answer that, actually.”

“I’m so sorry,” he began, his tone remorseful. “I told you—he’s dangerous, completely out of his mind. I should tell you that he has committed countless heinous acts like this. I won’t get into detail just yet. Once he decides to go after something, he won’t stop, especially if his conviction in his cause is strong.”

The blood drained from your face, your breath hitching as the gravity of Suguru’s actions overwhelmed you like a tidal wave, a heavy weight on your shoulders like you were suddenly responsible for all of this. All of this needless suffering. Even though just weeks ago you never gave a damn about who Suguru Geto was, and he didn’t even give a damn about who you were, either.

This defenseless, frail little girl he killed, to him she was just another casualty in his hands and was nothing more than a means to an end, which sickened you to your core. Your stomach twisted as bile threatened to rise in your throat, as a memory flashed of Asuka thanking you for your service.

How could someone be this cruel; how could someone hold such little regard for someone like Asuka? Another image of Asuka’s strained smile flashed in your head, her pigtails bouncing as she laughed at some joke you cracked that only a child would find funny.

“She was just a child, Gojo!” you shouted, vision bleary through your endless streams of tears. “Just a child! How could he do something like this?”

Gojo’s face went bleak, his own frustration for his former friend apparent. “I can’t tell you for sure. I want to give you an answer that makes sense. Believe me, I do. There’s no logic to his madness anymore. There never has been. He’s beyond reason, and that’s what makes him so dangerous.”

“Burn this.” You gestured to the box full of sweets and jewelry and the blood-stained teddy-bear, kicking at the box. “Burn it! Why are you still looking at me like that!? BURN IT!”

“Hey, hey, come on…” Gojo tried to comfort you, pulling you into an embrace (if you’d allow it), shushing you and attempting to help quell your sobbing. He admired how soft you felt in his arms, but tried to ignore those feelings, focusing on you instead, on your wellbeing. He came secondary here. Your safety was the number one priority for him. “Let me help you inside. Don’t worry about that. I’ll dispose of it. What do you want me to do with the teddy bear?”

“Dispose of it too,” you replied through uncontrollable sniffles, hastily wiping the continuous tears. “I can’t let her parents find that.”

You allowed him into your apartment, which had been the first time you let a man into your place since…well, college, actually.

Gojo hummed, eyes scanning the cozy apartment—even if it did look like it was in desperate need of a remodel. Small but filled with personality, just like you. You barely noticed his words. Your hands still trembled, your eyes kept darting between the door and the windows, half-expecting Suguru to show up.

“Quaint,” he remarked, eyeing the walls aligned in bookshelves filled to the brim with a variety of medicinal textbooks, and books and various studies written by medical professionals. There had even been some novels here and there, mostly focused on science fiction and fantasy. Gojo’s eyes flitted over the rows of books, pausing at the familiar figures of heroes and villains from comic books and fantasy worlds. A small smile tugged at his lips as he spotted an Aragorn figure next to a Batman one.

“Big reader?” he asked in a gentle tone, taking note of the way your shoulders still tensed up, and how distant your eyes were.

You managed a curt nod, your voice barely above a hoarse whisper, worn from the crying.

“Kind of have to be,” you answered, as your eyes landed on the sea of books. “But yeah, it’s one of the few things that keep me sane.”

As your sobs subsided into quieter sniffles, you saw Gojo’s tension easing slightly. You offered him a reassuring smile, however strained. You sauntered off to clean yourself off with a shower, and he made himself at home far too quickly for your tastes as he sprawled himself out on your only velvet green couch.

When you came back in more casual attire, you perked an eyebrow.

“So, who were those girls you were talking to at the pub?”

“Colleagues,” he replied as he glanced up at you, taking in the sight of you in your pajamas but deciding to spare you any comments given what just happened. “I’ve known them since high school.”

“Oh. Cool,” you said, fidgeting in your spot. “Where’d you go to high school?”

“The place I teach at now,” he replied. “It’s some Buddhist school.”

“Oh, so you teach?” you hummed in understanding. “That explains the uniform you usually wear.”

“Ah, yeah, they’re pretty particular about that stuff, even if I am a Sensei,” he said with a wave. “But that’s all boring work stuff. No one likes to hear me yap about it. My students are out on mission trips, and they won’t be back for another month or so probably since they’re out of Japan.”

“Mission trips?” you asked out of curiosity, joining him on your couch. “Oh, uh, how rude of me. Do you want some tea or something?”

“Nah, I’m okay. Thanks for offering,” he assured you with a smile. “And yeah. You know, going around, talking to people about Buddhism and stuff. Preaching. Volunteer work. All that hunk of shit…”

You scrunched your eyebrows. Something about this didn’t add up, but you decided not to pry too much. You figured Gojo would reveal key information in due time.

“So…did Geto attend this school of yours too?”

“Ah, you’re an intelligent one. I can see why you’re a nurse,” he chuckled as he adjusted his posture. “Yes, he did. He was in the same year as me. But he got expelled, when all that stuff went down.”

You weren’t sure how delicately you should approach the topic, but how else were you going to know unless you asked? Or at least…tried to gain some kind of understanding? Maybe it was the training and education instilled in you, but you wanted to get all of the pieces of the puzzle yourself.

“Why did he��become this way?”

Gojo met your eyes, and you bit back a gasp at how intense his eyes could be up close.

“I wish I knew.”

For a brief moment the pain he often masked flashed in his eyes, and you were taken aback, your breath hitching. Had he been closer to Geto once before than he let on…?

“It would be selfish of me to keep you here,” you said after a period of silence.

He took your hand in his. “Will you be alright?”

“Not now,” you admitted, but you managed a smile, even if you must have looked rough with your blood shot eyes from all of that crying. “But I will be. I always am.”

“Atta girl,” Gojo encouraged with a grin. You bade him farewell, not before offering him a little token of appreciation (just lent him a book), and he disposed of the ‘gifts’ Suguru sent to you for your sake.

You had never been more grateful for a man in your life until you met Satoru Gojo.

-- -- -- -- --

Another restless night. Tossing, turning, those numerous eyes back and fixated on you. Cold sweats. The wind knocked out of your body every time you shot back awake, alone in what should be the comforting darkness of your room but you wished someone could hold you and tell you everything was alright, that you were safe, that nothing would get you. For as long as you could remember, the only shoulder you had to lean on had been your own. Now you had Mei. Now you had Gojo, but you didn’t wish to push them more. You learned your own self-soothing methods for your own reasons.

Throughout the next weeks, you couldn’t ignore more signs of meddling. Mei pulled you aside and told you she needed to go on leave, complaining about how since that night at the restaurant, she hadn’t been able to hold down any food. She needed to be taken to proper care to manage these symptoms she couldn’t understand herself. She promised you she’d keep you updated. Some of your patients disappeared. Some stopped calling, checking in on loved ones admitted.

Colleagues began to act strangely around you, inquiring of your well being, inquiring whether you should go on leave yourself.  

Wherever you went, it felt like someone followed you. You didn’t have a moment of reprieve from the torment. Even when you tossed your head over your shoulder and saw nothing, you couldn’t shake the feeling of unease. You had nothing to protect you at the moment. Not too long ago, Gojo told you of some emergency going on at work, and that he had to accompany his students who were still away on those mission trips. He wasn’t going to be back for a while, so you had to fend for yourself for the time being.

Each night, more nightmares plagued you. More hands all over your body. More cold sweats.

More exhaustion.

You found it harder and harder to fight it off and the only person to lean on was yourself.

-- -- -- -- --

Expectedly, your situation didn’t improve for you at all.

Each passing day, every near freak accident you deftly avoided frayed at the edges, and your swore you would lose your mind at any given moment. You’d just stand idly at a cross walk, and a car would nearly zoom over your foot. While you organized your home, objects would fly across the room and shatter. You felt like everything began to fall around you—every shadow you came across now a threat, every creak of the floorboards of your apartment a vow that Suguru was watching you, closely, with that diabolical glint in his eyes. Not even sleep could grant you any true reprieve; still plagued with nightmares, still plagued with cold sweats and sensations of hands roaming all over your body. The comfort of your bed and your solitude couldn’t save you. Every time you tried to sleep, you saw the malicious flash of his smile, his mocking cackle.

And even that churning feeling in your stomach returned, suddenly unable to hold any food you consumed. Frequent visits to the toilet each night worsened your already mucked up sleep schedule.

After you deftly dodged another near death experience, you sprinted down your street toward your apartment. You didn’t focus on the things in front of you, which led you to crash into the last man you ever wanted to see at a time like this.

“Why are you in such a rush, my dear?” Suguru cooed as he helped you back on your feet, refusing to let you go, though. He tightened his grip on you, and you stared up at him with a defiant glint in your eyes.

“I just want to get home,” you retorted. “Please. I don’t want any trouble, Suguru.”

“There will be no trouble at all, my love, although,” he trailed off, eyes flitting to the things around you, and your hairs stood on end as that cold, prickly feeling came on again. “It seems there are more of thees damned spirits I must exorcise from you. A stream of bad luck, lately?”

Your face hardened, gawking at him like he’d sprouted five new heads. “How do you know about these things?”

“It’s what I do,” he replied, tone even. “Perhaps you found unexplained cold spots in your home. Objects flying across the room. Your things knocking over. Occasionally you feel like you’ve forgotten how to breathe. And some nights, you dream you’re being assaulted.”

“But…!”

“And let me guess, you’ve also had symptoms that are akin to food poisoning. Unable to hold your food down. Like that friend of yours. That blonde receptionist.”

Where was Gojo when you needed him the most?

He cupped your face, gazing down at you with a malicious glint in his eyes.

“I can make it disappear, my love. All of it. But you must cooperate with me. If you are having those dreams, you must allow me to exorcise it…in a way I know I don’t have to explain to you. Some of these spirits aren’t so easy to absorb, you see.”

Did you really have any options at the moment? How much longer could you wait for Gojo to return before you died from another freak accident?

Lips pursued, you nodded. You led him to your apartment, and you allowed him to rest you on your bed.

“I do wish there was another way to exorcise these stronger spirits,” Geto said in a remorseful tone. “Thank you for trusting me.”

But you didn’t. Never in a million years would you ever willingly trust Geto, or believe in these spiritual whoo whoo stuff, but if he could help you, like he did before…shouldn’t you just accept the help when Gojo wasn’t here to do that?

A low wisp of your skirt and underwear flying across the room caught your attention, and you dared to look down as he spread your legs, bony fingers cold against your bare, supple skin.

“Trust me, my love, I’ll make this worth it.”

He pressed his fingers between your folds, and you choked on a gasp. He hummed in approval, inspecting the slick already building up.

“My, my, this is a concern,” he purred, “Allow me to make it all disappear.”

He lowered his mouth to you, closing over that sensitive nub filled with nerves, and your fingers dug into your sheets. You tried not to enjoy it, but he was being kind, focused on your relief, not just from these ‘spirits’ he claimed to have haunted you.

Each orgasm he coaxed out of you mounted to such a degree you never thought possible. He drew little patterns with the tip of his tongue between your soaked, sopping folds.

He managed three. Three orgasms. Each more mind-blowing than the last.

Finally, he pulled away, licking off his fingers drenched in your slick and letting out a lewd groan.

“Absolutely divine,” he praised, “Luckily these spirits don’t need the full meal to be exorcised. You’re welcome, my dear.”

“Do let me know if you sleep easier tonight,” he finished with a kiss to your forehead. “I’ll help you clean up.”

-- -- -- -- --

Geto: sleeping better, my dear?

You stared at the screen through blood shot eyes. 3:33AM. Not at all since you opened those gifts he sent you, or that night when he stole you away, but he likely had a fair idea already. Ignoring the rage boiling in your blood, you typed up a response; you knew you couldn’t make him angry or test his patience.

You couldn’t let him snap—not again. No more blood on your, or his hands.

You: no.

Geto: really? Perhaps I might need to pay you another visit, exorcise those demons from you once and for all.

You: I’d rather you didn’t, that night was a mistake.

Geto: my dear…please. Never say that. While I wish our first time was under different circumstances, I quite enjoyed myself.

You: you’re a sick bastard

Geto: darling, you look absolutely repulsive when you’re sad. Fix yourself up before I come get you.

Your eyes flitted to the window, only to see no one there.

You: you piece of shit…

Suddenly, before you could think, everything faded to black.

When you woke up again, you didn’t meet your own ceiling. You weren’t in your room. The ceilings were much higher, and upon further inspection, you noticed that the room was devoid of any true personality, and only contained the cushion which you rested upon. You realized your head pounded incessantly, and you clutched it, groaning as you struggled to remember what happened.

“Welcome home, my love.” Chills danced up your spine at the sound of a voice you hoped not to hear for a while. As you adjusted, you realized your legs were chained to the wall across from you, and you shot a glare at the man standing at the door.

“Scream all you like,” he laughed as his lips stretched into a sadistic grin, matching his equally manic features. “No one will hear you, and no one will help you. Satoru certainly won’t any time soon.”

You didn’t scream. You wanted to, but you bit into your cheek so hard you drew blood, feeling some of that metallic tang rush onto your tongue. You refused to give him that satisfaction.

“What do you want?” you spat, but in spite of the strength in your tone, your lower lip quivered and you hated yourself.

“My motives are simple, darling,” he replied as he approached you, and you wished you had the power to crawl away but the chains to your legs prevented such autonomy. “You. You are what I want. I’ve never seen such an anomaly like you amongst filthy humans—someone who radiated purity. I wish to harness that purity, to shield you from the horrors of the world, inflicted by species as invasive as those worthless monkeys.”

You jumped at the sheer vindictiveness in his tone.

“You must see it within yourself, my love,” he purred, resting on his knees as his eyes raked your form up and down. “You have such a strength to you, such a beauty that is unmatched, and I am a simple man beyond my ambitious dreams. I need such a strong force to ground me, especially if I intend to see through on my plans…”

Your jaw locked as he rested a hand on your knee.

“I desire someone who cannot break,” he added with a sadistic laugh. “No matter what happens.”

“Don’t touch me,” you hissed, but he didn’t relent, tightening his grip on your knee and pulling you toward him until your eyes were level with his. In spite of the situation you found yourself in, you glared, and that only seemed to make him giddy.

“You are exactly the partner I need,” he whispered, pressing a possessive kiss to the crown of your head, which made you whimper. “In the new world I hope to create. Even if you aren’t a sorcerer, you are perfect for me, my dear. You have already taught me that perhaps there are some exceptions. Not all humans were built weak, after all. Some can adapt to a world ran by sorcerers, the peak of human evolution.”

Sorcerers? What the hell kind of drugs was this guy snorting?

“You will help bridge the gap between who is worthy and who isn’t, my love,” he went on, running a hand through your hair and cooing at you like you were his pet. “You will be that beacon of hope for those who desire to live when I rid the world of the weak monkeys.”

“Stop touching me,” you demanded once more, but of course, he didn’t relent. He didn’t humor you for a moment, pressing another feathery kiss to your forehead.

“Rest, my dear,” he finished, pulling away. “For tomorrow you begin your new life in our little family. The twins will be so happy to see you here safe and sound.”

[batmanlovesnirvana]

— How Faith Shapes Superman’s Identity | analysis

SUPERMAN is best known for his incredible superpowers, such as super strength and invulnerability, but an often overlooked aspect of his character is his faith. This belief system plays a crucial role in shaping his moral compass and can even provide practical advantages in challenging situations, giving him an edge over other non-believing heroes like Batman, who also may not share the same convictions.

Though Superman was created by two Jewish writers, he was raised by Jonathan and Martha Kent, a Christian couple who instilled in him a sense of morality and ethics. However, Superman's faith is not rigidly tied to any specific religion. Instead, based on his extensive experiences as a superhero, he believes in a higher power or a God-like force. This broader spiritual outlook allows him to reject specific religious doctrines, such as the concept of Hell, which he doesn't believe exists. Interestingly, in Jewish teachings, Hell—or "Gehinnom"—isn't seen as a physical place of eternal suffering but rather as an intense feeling of shame for one's misdeeds. This spiritual anguish, a temporary state, serves to purify the soul. This concept resonates with Superman’s beliefs, acknowledging a higher moral accountability without subscribing to the idea of a punitive Hell, subtly nodding to his creators' Jewish heritage.

This belief becomes particularly significant in *Batman/Superman: World's Finest #3*, written by Mark Waid and illustrated by Dan Mora. In the story, the villain Felix Faust traps Superman, Batman, and Billy Batson in an illusion designed to mimic Hell. The illusion is so convincing that Batman struggles to cope with the experience. In contrast, Superman remains calm and composed. His serenity allows him to see through the illusion and identify Faust's location, ultimately disrupting the sorcerer's magic.

Superman's super-hearing aids him in pinpointing Faust's position, but his composure stems from a deeper source: his conviction that a benevolent God would not create a place of eternal torment like Hell. This strong belief prevents him from being psychologically manipulated by Faust's magic. For Superman, the idea that Hell does not exist is a fundamental part of his worldview, which gives him clarity in situations where others might falter.

This incident highlights the practical benefits of Superman's faith, especially since he is typically vulnerable to magic. Magic users often try to exploit heroes' fears, but Superman's strong conviction acts as a shield against such psychological attacks. Unlike Batman, who, despite being an atheist and not believing in Hell, still falls prey to the illusion, Superman's firm belief provides a unique form of resilience. This suggests that merely not believing in something isn't enough; it takes a strong and positive faith to withstand such deceptive tactics.

Superman's religious beliefs are a key component of what makes him a remarkable hero. While his physical powers allow him to confront threats far beyond the capacity of ordinary humans, it is his unwavering commitment to justice and morality that truly defines him. Without this deep-seated faith, Superman might be more susceptible to believing in a punitive and unjust concept of Hell.

Even if future storylines in DC Comics depict his son Jon as an atheist, it is evident that faith remains a core aspect of Clark's character. Superman's belief in the non-existence of Hell not only strengthens his resolve but also serves as a vital tool in overcoming villainous deceptions, proving that his spiritual beliefs are as significant as his more tangible superpowers.

A.N : any other opinions are welcome. Don’t hesitate to leave a comment or reblog, I would appreciate it :)

Also should I do the same for Bruce/Batman ?