#nomorehiding
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TRUE HAPPINESS
Throughout my life, I haven't made the best decisions. I went left instead of right when I should have stayed right and vice versa. I have hit when I should pass. I chose violence when things didn't go my way like a bratty little boy. I tried to bully when people made mistakes, and I couldn't take criticism to save my life. I felt like there was never a choice for me. I had to be this angry, disgruntled, young man and I was raised to believe that was the way it had to go. For years I believed that lie, felt sorry for myself when I caused all the havoc and chaos. Now I know better.
We tell ourselves stories to make ourselves feel better. Whether justifying terrible things we did to people, giving up on something we were working on, or procrastinating on something we need to take care, it's more comfortable to do so. We want to feel that feeling that we don't need to change. And beside do you know how much work we would have to do to change? Man forget that noise. However, I made the decision to get better, and it has been hard, hard work.
Every time I thought I was doing better, I was quickly slapped with the realization that I had more to learn. I had more layers of the onion I had to peel, and yes, they made me cry. I had a therapist who told me I needed to shed the asshole skin. I was nowhere near where I needed to be. And the thing was, when people challenged me on it, I would get really upset defensive and you guessed it, angry. I think I wanted the world to see what I was feeling and although many people said they saw changes; it wasn't everyone and deep down in my gut I knew there was still more layers to remove.
I would find myself on Facebook crying about my life and how unfair it was. One of the biggest lessons I have learned, and it's a stinger, is you are responsible for everything that happens to you. You make decisions, take risks, roll the dice if you will, and the outcome always is different. Sometimes favorable, sometimes not. However, I need to know I am the one who holds the keys. I drive the car as much as I can within reason. I blamed other people for their reactions to me, when in reality I pushed really hard. Yes, I have borderline, and that is something we do. However, that does not give me an excuse to be a shitbird.
One of the things I really have learned and honed in on is its always a good idea to think about how things affect other people. Then you ask yourself, would I like someone to do that to me. See I really didn't have the respect for myself that I should have. I would talk badly about myself, feel hopeless and depressed, and I took that out on people constantly. Even when I knew I was wrong and trying to grow. It really hurts to see what your experience has been, and how some people don't have the same experience you had.
Since my trip to Arizona, I have learned a lot about energy. How to attract good energy and how to do things differently. I faced many of my demons head on and did some amazing work. This summer I was forced to confront a lot of the stories I told myself finding out that many of them were bullshit. So, I had to do what any good yogi would do, I had to let that shit go man.
Once I did, things opened up. I realize I do have a say in what happens. I am practicing the art of response versus reaction. Noticing how I feel when I get triggered and remember it is I who assigns a trigger meaning. No one else. I am in full responsibility of what I say or do. I own all of it. The good, the bad, the ugly; all of it. I have finally come to terms with this.
The yin-yang is the merging of light and darkness. There is not one without the other, We can pride ourselves on that we do nothing wrong, but we are perfect. However, we are good if we continuously hold space for ourselves for self-love and forgiveness. Understanding practice makes progress, not perfection. Live life one breath, one moment at a time and feel everything and cherish it. And feel grateful for all of it.
And that my friends, is true happiness.
Love and namaste
M
#mindfullness#breathenbounce#yogainspiration#selflove#mindfulness#mindset#yoga#gratitude#bpd#love#faceit#nomorehiding#true happiness
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Made my facebook name my actual name #nomorehiding #revealingwhoitrulyam 🥺🥺😜
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Affirm to yourself today, NO MORE EXCUSES! Time to embody the greatness within your Ancestral lineage to live as their manifestation today! Remember if you don't learn to lead yourself, others will lead you....astray! Make the decision to learn now: www.ancestralvoices.co.uk/filmsbooks LINK IN BIO 'HOME-STUDY COURSE' #affirmations #affirmation #affirmationsoftheday #positiveaffirmations #affirmationaddict #heritage #nomorehiding #nomoreexcuses #embraceyourself #blackancestors #lead #leadership #leader #leadbyexample #leadershipdevelopment https://www.instagram.com/p/CDjFimPDJn5/?igshid=1pt0e5lfqyyf0
#affirmations#affirmation#affirmationsoftheday#positiveaffirmations#affirmationaddict#heritage#nomorehiding#nomoreexcuses#embraceyourself#blackancestors#lead#leadership#leader#leadbyexample#leadershipdevelopment
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I used to think I had to "get good to get God," that I had to earn it and keep earning it. I was a slave to the hustle of faith. So I'd keep my prayers light. Safe. Proper. I'd hide the parts of me that weren't shiny and successful, holy and good. I'd hide my questions and shackles and shame. Then I came to know the truth- you can't hide anything from God AND there's no need to hide. God sees it all AND welcomes us just the same. All can be opened to the Light and made new. So dear ones, come as you are. Bring it all and bare it all. Come with God to the wide, clean wilderness of prayer. The Eternal One, Our Maker, knows We are seen and we are searched No need to harden your defenses No need to hide It changes nothing All that is found is loved The blessings and the brokenness The wins and the worry The success and the sin All is found and all is loved So rest Rest in this promise and blessing Rest in God in the wilderness Release it all Surrender to your Beloved As clay to the Potter As song to the Singer As seed to the good, dark earth buried, but made ready to burst forth with New Life Breath Prayer: Here I am... Psalm 139:1-3 O Lord, you have searched me and known me. You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from far away. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. #lent #selfreflection #honestwithyourself #nomorehiding #godsgrace #godsgraceandmercy #youbeyou #graceupongrace #godsgraceissufficient #restingod #soulcare #selfcare #spiritualcare #spiritualpractice #mindfulnesspractice #restingingod #encounteringgod #blessingofgod #godsblessing #stoplooklisten #fullypresent #godisnear #christianspirituality #christianprayer #scriptureprayer #newbirth #newlife #righteousness #spiritualmaturity (at Sarasota, Florida) https://www.instagram.com/p/B9T6N5DFWAT/?igshid=189n7o3uhu8tm
#lent#selfreflection#honestwithyourself#nomorehiding#godsgrace#godsgraceandmercy#youbeyou#graceupongrace#godsgraceissufficient#restingod#soulcare#selfcare#spiritualcare#spiritualpractice#mindfulnesspractice#restingingod#encounteringgod#blessingofgod#godsblessing#stoplooklisten#fullypresent#godisnear#christianspirituality#christianprayer#scriptureprayer#newbirth#newlife#righteousness#spiritualmaturity
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MY ABUSE, PART 1 -
It started when I was eight years old, my brother started something that would define the rest of my life. For most kids of that age, life is supposed to be filled with happiness and joy, and honestly I can't look back on good memories of my child hood, for the most part I can't my teenage years either, it's only filled with darkness, hatred and fear, I've tried to think of the happy times but I can count on one hand how many real good moments I can recall.
The sexual and mental abuse he forced upon me continued almost every week til the age of eighteen coming onto nineteen. For eleven years, I was mentally imprisoned by him, I couldn't escape, always too scared and ashamed of what my life had been for so long. I lived a life of fear and hurt. For eleven years, I wanted to scream and shout, I wanted to cry, but my mental state would not permit it, I was stuck in a mind set of protection for so long that I couldn't do anything that could risk further pain. Always too scared to act. Always stuck as that terrified child he started with.
During the later years, when I was in secondary school, he had my neice, someone I knew I had to protect from the monster that is her father, every chance I got I was round there, keeping an eye on her, looking after her until his wife got home. Only to realise that I wasn't just protecting her, I was making sure that she didn't take my place, he would continue to abuse me, but at least I knew that for as long as I was there, he could never lay a hand on her. She wasn't going to suffer the same fate I did...
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Part 3? Story of my life. 😐
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So let's talk about the fact that Tay is using butterflies to symbolize a new era and and in Selena's song revival she mentions that she was under self restoration and it's her time to butterfly!
@taylorswift
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My Favorite Smile...
Quit hiding behind the mask. Diamonds & jewels must go away as well. Be raw. Let the sun guide you through it all. Let the wind mess up your hair. Let go of all your inhibitions. When you allow it, you will finally smile. I want to be the one to remind you what it is like to smile…⚡️
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Word of the year | Phrase of the year. ⠀ Share yours below, let’s lift each other. ⠀ ⠀ #liveyourtruth #holywomanhood #holymotherhood #nomorehiding #samastitihi #writeclubnow #nopantsbestpants #takeoffyourbra https://www.instagram.com/p/BsOe6PXl4MV/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1s1w3c56y14e8
#liveyourtruth#holywomanhood#holymotherhood#nomorehiding#samastitihi#writeclubnow#nopantsbestpants#takeoffyourbra
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Peek-A-Boo I See Me! #peekaboo #iseeme #iam #myfirst #selfcare #selflove #mytrueself #nomorehiding #likeitornot #iamme #unapologetic https://www.instagram.com/p/BpBJFJMHfB-/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1hlmff443w4gz
#peekaboo#iseeme#iam#myfirst#selfcare#selflove#mytrueself#nomorehiding#likeitornot#iamme#unapologetic
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Boys
There is a story not to be told
about a boy whose heart is of gold
his feelings were not to be seen
and his tears not allowed to meet thee
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I am Trans and I am beautiful.
I used to be ashamed of who I am. I used to hide my sexuality, and my gender identity. I grew up feeling like I wasn’t normal. Like I was a freak. I hated pretending to be someone I wasn’t. No more. Trans is beautiful. I am beautiful. And I will hide it no longer.
#transgender#trans#transbeautiful#no shame#couragetobeme#nomorehiding#beyourself#iamnotafreak#courage#coming out#transition#dont judge me
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Summer is CALLING! Are you ready to step out in style?! For many of us it’s been a while! For many of us the anxiety has only gotten worse, and the body image … and maybe even the identity … it’s perfectly understandable! We’ve been through a lot! But the world is waiting! I designed Fashion Therapy because I see so many passionate, brilliant women struggle with a fear of being seen, self sabotage, and difficulty expressing themselves. I help tune in to your Spirit Style to discover and unearth your unique Personal Culture and together we connect that with your Higher Self. Your passions, values and mission are way more important than what you wear, but when what you wear aligns you can communicate and attract effectively. This is what makes personal style the ultimate life hack and why I love teaching women how to leverage the power of personal style as a communication tool, and even healing modality. The work we can do together in Fashion Therapy is confidence boosting personal growth, and not only will you look fabulously you, you’ll feel empowered and embodied and excited to be get out of bed, get dressed and show up. How would that feel to you?! 👣 💃🏻 💪🏽 . . . #personalstyle #anxiety #socialanxiety #spiritstyle #fashiontherapy #showup #fearofbeingseen #selfsabotage #stepout #levelup #visibility #imageconsultant #stylecoach #confidencecoach #coachescoach #getreadyforyourcloseup #timetoshine #nomorehiding #faceyourfears #bigmoment #momentinthesun #standout #emerge #passion #nostyle #prostyle #stylelab #stylistapproved #stylist #designer (at Themis and Thread) https://www.instagram.com/p/CdZmWNMOqi1/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
#personalstyle#anxiety#socialanxiety#spiritstyle#fashiontherapy#showup#fearofbeingseen#selfsabotage#stepout#levelup#visibility#imageconsultant#stylecoach#confidencecoach#coachescoach#getreadyforyourcloseup#timetoshine#nomorehiding#faceyourfears#bigmoment#momentinthesun#standout#emerge#passion#nostyle#prostyle#stylelab#stylistapproved#stylist#designer
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A little late posting. Last weekend’s shenanigans at the SLO Spartan Race. Got to hangout with fun peeps 🎉to do the Beast , Súper and get my 3rd Trifecta 🙌🏾 No Atlanta Spartan Race this weekend for me🥲 . Wishing all Atlanta racers a great race! Next up San Antonio Spartan Race 🏃🏽♀️ 🙌🏾 Gotta love the #Blackriflecofee stickers #spartanrace #spartanslo #mudocr #ocr #trifecta #beast #super #run #outdoors #gettingback #spartanstrongwomen #spartanwomen #hairisback #nomorehiding (at Santa Margarita Ranch, Santa Margarita Ca) https://www.instagram.com/p/CbU2cW6rBRL/?utm_medium=tumblr
#blackriflecofee#spartanrace#spartanslo#mudocr#ocr#trifecta#beast#super#run#outdoors#gettingback#spartanstrongwomen#spartanwomen#hairisback#nomorehiding
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Chillen with the ham in our new place. She finally got comfortable enough to venture out of the closet #teddythecat #nomorehiding #newhome https://www.instagram.com/p/CaTuApYrevQ/?utm_medium=tumblr
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I won't often post anything too serious unless it is something serious about comedy. I'm breaking that rule I have for myself. I just need to say this and be done. #NoMoreHiding https://www.instagram.com/chuckfurycomedy/p/CYs0YfLuV2V/?utm_medium=tumblr
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