#no wonder she's been fucking ignoring my texts on the matter for the past 6 months

[thatdykepunkslut]

MY HOUSEMATE IS GETTING FUCKING MARRIED AND MOVING TO FUCKING GEORGIA AND SHE CHOOSES TO TELL US THIS 2 WEEKS BEFORE OUR LEASE IS DUE TO BE RE-SIGNED???

WHAT THE FUCK???????????

[slytherweasley]

Cam girl (George Weasley x reader)

Warnings: Smut and swearing

Summary: George logs onto his computer every week at the same time to watch his favourite cam girl because she reminds him of a girl he used to have a crush on at Hogwarts. One day he decides to pay to private message her and she responds.

George logs onto his computer at 10pm, the same time every Monday, Tuesday and Friday. Today’s Friday, the last day of the week until he has to wait until Monday. For the past month George has been watching a cam girl, she goes by Honey but that’s not her name. The thing that excites George about it all is that she’s anonymous, no one knows what she looks like under the mask.

You setup your computer so the webcam can get everything, you find all the toys you want to use and line them up. You put on your mask and watch the time as it hits 10pm and press stream. The viewers get transferred to your livestream. People assume everyone there is old men but you’ve seen pictures in private messages and some of them are quite good looking. Your job isn’t all sex, for the first 10 minutes you have conversations with the viewers and sometimes people just want to private message you to have some company.

George has never typed anything in the chat before because he’s too nervous too, he doesn’t know what to say. He watches you as you sit on the bed and answer comments from the live chat. He originally clicked on your stream because you reminded him of a girl he used to have a crush on at Hogwarts. She was in Hufflepuff and he had said only a few words to her but he knew so much about her.

You stop answering questions when you check the time and get ready. You ease into it by touching yourself over your lingerie. George tries to stop himself from touching himself so early in the show but the way you moan and mutter dirty things makes his mind go insane. You start to strip first revealing your breasts and you see the chat comments speed up as more new comments roll in and more viewers tune in. You get an average of 5-25k views, it all depends on the day.

You strip until you’re fully naked and lay down spreading your legs out. You use your fingers to spread your pussy open and tease your clit. George starts to palm himself through his pants. You get out a pink dildo, the men prefer 6-8 inches and bright coloured so you tend to use them but you have a large collection. You get closer to the webcam and lick up the dildo putting it in your mouth and making it wet.

You put it inside you once you’re satisfied with how long you’d been deepthroating it. George pulls his pants and boxers down and touches himself right away, wasting no time. He usually cums twice, it doesn’t take too long for him to get hard after once because he watches the whole show.

You liked doing the show because it is a way to let out all your stress and you have a desirable body that thousands of people want to see and you get generous donations during the livestream and to pay to private message you. You stay up for a few hours after your stream to talk to people because the more you talk the more they spend money on you.

Once you’d cum a few times and filled up the time you end the stream by reminding people about private messages, $5 to talk the whole night. George felt an urge to message you but he decided not tonight, he had to go to work the next day and help Fred with the shop. He took a shower and couldn’t stop thinking about you, he got ready for bed and closed his eyes and realised he couldn’t sleep if he didn’t attempt to message you. It was a couple hours after your show had ended and he decided to message you. You probably get hundreds of messages a night.

Ha pays the money to send a message he types in something simple “Hi, I watch your shows every night” he presses send and waits a bit doing other things, the notification pops up on the corner of his screen and he sees you answered. “Thank you, it means a lot, we haven’t spoken before, have we?” it was polite but George was thrilled you actually answered. He immediately types back “No we haven’t but I’ve been watching for a month now, I never got the courage to even send a live chat until now.”

George stayed up for hours talking to you. You signed off for the night to all the other men in your chats just to talk to him. He seemed like one of the guys who was nice and you were both the same age, he’s 25 as well but you don’t give out your age or actual name. You could pass for younger or older. Every night even when shows weren’t on you’d talk, the more detail you knew about him and the more sexual the conversations were the more you liked him. You’d stay up extra late to talk to him and you found yourself realising you’re getting attached and giving him false hope that you’d meet up one day.

“What’s your real name?” He asks “I can’t tell you, it’s apart of the mystery, besides you haven’t told me your name yet” “I understand and I do prefer not knowing, my name is George just so you know.” Your heart skips a beat and you feel as though you’d been transported back to Hogwarts, you had a huge crush on George Weasley, you didn’t know him well but you fancied him and your friends knew, you had common friends but never became friends. You used to be so shy and that is the one thing you wish you got over sooner so you could become friends with George. As far as you know he’s been doing very well for himself at Weasley’s Wizards Wheezes. You always thought about going in there but thinking about how shy you were makes you feel insecure and shy.

“I love that name, I used to know someone with that name, he was a great person, just like you” you reply “I’ll admit I’m so surprised you’ve been talking to me everyday for a week” “I’ve grown to like you, George.”After talking for another week you couldn’t get him off your mind and you knew that you were in too far.

“I don’t want you to keep paying every night, here’s my number. I trust you enough.” George just assumed you talked to everyone the same as him but you seemed to like him. He saves the number in his phone under Honey.

As the weeks went by, you were talking more than just at night. You became friends and you started to hate that George was calling you Honey. “I wish I could talk to you in person” he types “Why don’t we do it then?” “In person?” “Lets meet up, we can hook up at my place if you’re comfortable” you couldn’t believe you were doing this. “Are you sure? Neither of us know much about each other’s physical appearance, you don’t even know what I look like.” “I don’t care, I’ve fallen for you and we should meet up.” You send him an address to meet up a couple blocks from your house just in case he isn’t as sweet on the internet.

You get there early and stand on the busy street, each man that goes by you get hopeful until you see him, George Weasley standing there looking around for someone. In a matter of seconds everything clicks in your head, you’ve been talking to George Weasley, no wonder you were so in love with this guy you’d just met online. You apparate out of there before he sees you. You get into your apartment and send him a text “I’m so sorry George, I just threw up and I’m not in the mood to see anyone, I hope you know I’m not an asshole.” He texts back almost immediately “I get it, don’t feel bad we can reschedule” “Thank you for understanding.”

The next couple days you ignored his messages and he even tried to contact you on live chat but you wouldn’t message back. “I’m sorry if I wasn’t what you expected, I think I got the message” George knew it seemed weird she would text right as they were supposed to meet, she definitely saw him and ran. Your heart breaks and you feel obligated to message “Are you free right now?” You text back “Why?” “Let’s meet up, same spot and I promise I’ll be there to explain everything” “I’ll be there soon.”

You use magic to clean up your house just in case he isn’t grossed out by you and does want to come back to hook up. You apparate and see he is already there waiting, he seems shocked that you apparated “Honey?” He asks trying to get closer to see your face in the dark. You take a deep breath and get closer to him so he can see your face “Y/n?” “Hi George” “Did you know?” “No, I had no idea until I saw you and got scared so I apparated home.” “What do you think?” “I could ask the same” “I asked you first” “I’ve always fancied you, since about fourth year but I didn’t know you so I didn’t say anything.” “We knew each other just weren’t close” “So what do you think?” “I’ve fancied you since fifth year so I’m happy, I’m shocked though, you were so shy.” “I’m a different person to what I used to be” “I can tell” “So what do you want to do?” “Love, this makes this so much better, let’s go to yours.”

You take his hand and apparate him into your apartment. You help take off his coat and lead him to your bedroom. “Wow, this looks so much cooler in person” “It’s probably because you’ve only seen one wall of the room.” He walks around “Do you want to see the toys?” He nods and you open up a few drawers full of them. “Wow, that’s a lot, do you ever use magic?” “Sometimes if I’m tired of doing it myself but never on camera.”

You make the first move and kiss George, his lips are cold but your warm lips pressed to his feels nice. “Can I undress you?” “Of course, just promise me you won’t treat me differently now you know I’m me” “No way, I get to fuck you on the bed I’ve seen for months, I’m not going to treat you any differently than how I told you I would.” You smile and bite your lip trying to hide your excitement as he discards your clothes.

“You’re just as beautiful in real life” he kisses down your neck to your breasts and sucks on one of your nipples and you let out a whimper, he kisses down your body and hovers above your pussy. “Please George” you moan, he licks from your core up to your clit. He fingers you with two fingers first before sucking on your clit and curling his fingers inside you. Your fingers grasp his soft hair and pull on it while the other grips the side of the bed,

“George! I’m going to cum” you yell and he pounds his fingers into you “Fuck” he pulls his fingers out of you and licks them off. He takes off his shirt and unbuttons his pants while you’re recovering from your high. “I’m ready, I need your cock in me, George” you palm him through his pants and slide a hand into his boxers, jerking him off. He pulls them down “Lay down” you do as he says while he strokes himself a few times before lining himself up with your core.

He slides himself in and groans at the feeling “Fuck” he moans and slowly picks up the pace until he gets used to the feeling. “You’re so fucking tight, Y/n” he pounds himself into you, you feel yourself sink into the mattress with every stroke. Your eyes roll to the back of your head and you let out a loud moan. “So fucking hot” You grip onto his bicep and look into his eyes when you are about to cum. Without saying anything he already knows “Come on, you’re so close” he rubs your clit with his other hand and you finish around him. “Holy shit, feels so good, you’re throbbing on my cock” you feel him finish and he lays beside you.

You lay your head on his chest “Thank you” he says “No, thank you, that was great” “I know you don’t do this for everyone so thanks and if you you did like it and want me to come around again I’ll be happy to.” You kiss his lips “George I want to see you again, a lot more often but also do other things like go to dinner or something.” You wait to see what he will say hoping he will agree. “Are you asking me on a date?” “No im asking you to be my boyfriend” “Really?” He sounds surprised “You don’t have to say yes I was just saying I’d like that” “Yes.”

George was fine with you doing your job, your shoes ever night and private messaging other guys because he knew that’s what you had to do to earn money. If he couldn’t be at your apartment one night he’d just watch your livestream.

[lottiebagley]

7 things- Draco Malfoy

I probably shouldn't say this But at times I get so scared When I think about the previous Relationship we shared

"I hate this," Hermione Granger complains as she drops her bag onto the table opposite her best friend

"And what's this?" The girl speaks with no emotion. She looks almost numb. Clearly tired of everything going on in her life.

"You. You being all sad and depressed. If you like Draco this much just be with him,"

"It's more complicated than that and you know it," she speaks in a harsh tone, her voice low as she glances up to see if Draco and his friends had heard the girl's conversation.

"It doesn't have to be. It's like you guys went through all the drama of getting us on board for like 6 months and then just broke up," Hermione comments, staring at her friend trying to work out what she can say to force her to go and tell her ex-boyfriend she's still madly in love with him.

"Look, Draco decided that I wasn't worth the trouble and that's fine. I am fine. Clearly, he is fine. It's all-"

"Fine you've said," Hermione quips

"Then stop pushing Hermione," she snaps. Hermione's eyes widen a little, not expecting to the reaction but one glance at Draco, who has a slytherin girl from the year below draped across his lap in the library, is enough to let her know that her friends anger wasn't directed at her.

"I can't be here. I'll see you later," she gathers her books, stuffing them into her bag and exiting the library.

Hermione watches Draco, seemingly ignoring his friends as he watches her leave, his usual smirk replaced by a look Hermione isn't quite sure what means but would bet meant he was as in love with her best friend as she was with him.

It was awesome, but we lost it It's not possible for me not to care And now we're standing in the rain But nothing's ever gonna change until you hear My dear

Draco Malfoy was not a stalker, he was not the kind of boy that lurked around just to get a glimpse at a girl. Especially not a muggle born Gryffindor.

He repeats this over and over in his head, willing himself to turn around and walk around while he still can. He could leave right now and no one would ever have to know he was here.

But he couldn't.

Watching her in her quidditch robe, drenched in mud and rain but seemingly happy as she laughs with Fred Weasley, he couldn't just leave. No matter how much he wanted to.

She's walking in his direction, her and Fred at the back of the group but they all walk relatively together. Oliver Wood, who is at the front of the team talking with George, is the first to see him, scowling as he mutters something to George who shoots Draco a dirty look.

She stops when she sees him.

"You go ahead Freddie," she assures

"He's an arrogant prick," Fred mutters, purposely shoving Draco with his shoulder on his was past.

Once the team have retreated far enough to be out of ear shot she lets out a sigh.

"You'll catch a cold standing around in the rain," she comments

"Maybe," He smiles gently before letting out a sigh  "I wanted to speak to you though,"

"We share almost all out classes. And they are inside, in the day, where it's not pouring rain,"

"I know that," he snaps, sighing a little "I couldn't talk to you there. I-"

"Oh of course you couldn't. Cause heaven forbid any of your little blood supremacist friends know you want to speak to me. Least of all your new girlfriend, Isabella right? Or is Lilliana this week?"

"Come on. You know they mean nothing," He protests

"They mean enough that you'll be seen with them in public. Which is more than I can say for me,"

"Well I wouldn't wait around in the pouring rain for them," He smiles gently, it drops when the scowl on her face doesn't change

"Is that supposed to be romantic?"

"Kind of," He smirks, she lets out a huff, trying to ignore how much she wants to kiss him

"What do you want?"

"To see how you are," he shrugs

"I'm not your problem anymore Draco. We said we'd both tell our friends and I did and you didn't and then you dumped me. So you don't  get to check up on me anymore," she states simply

"I still care about you," he sighs, she could cry on the spot. She forced herself to stop crying over Draco Malfoy weeks ago, but now he's so impossibly close and all she wants is him. She hated that she wanted him.

"Well you shouldn't. Now get inside and warm up before you catch a cold," she demands, he softens, hearing the slight crack in her voice but she slips past him before he can say anything else.

The seven things I hate about you The seven things I hate about you Oh, you You're vain, your games, you're insecure You love me, you like her You made me laugh, you made me cry, I don't know which side to buy

"Mr Malfoy your partner is Miss Y/L/N, go and switch seats with Mr Weasley please," Professor Snape demands, moving onto the next pairing of people.

Draco nods when his friends mutter condolences for being paired with her but on the inside his heart is hammering in his chest as he approaches her.

"Hi," he smiles gently, dropping into the seat me to her

"Careful, someone will see," she mutters, he chuckles under his breath, not wanting to draw any attention to them.

"As long as Lilliana doesn't I'm all good,"

"You like her?" She questions, cocking her head to the side in curiosity.

Draco shrugs, beginning to slice the dandelion root as she works on the bat wings.

"Not as much as I like you," he speaks, she rolls her eyes trying to fright the blush on her cheeks "That was smooth right?" He teases

"Until you ruined it by asking," she smiles despite herself, he laughs, turning into a cough when Theo Nott turns around to look at them in curiosity.

"You really do care way too much what other people think Malfoy," she comments

"Yeah," he nods, surprising her a little when he doesn't shoot her claim down.

"Right. Well. Stop doing that," she stumbles a little over her words. He glances at her blushing cheeks.

He doesn't do anything. Doesn't speak. Doesn't smile. Doesn't scowl. Doesn't smirk.

He just stares at her for a full minute before turning back to the cauldron.

Your friends, they're jerks, and when you act like them, just know it hurts I wanna be with the one I know And the seventh thing I hate the most that you do You make me love you

"What the fuck are you looking at mudblood?" Lilliana, Draco's new girlfriend, spits from under his arm.

She had been staring at Draco, wondering if he was as really happy and wishing he'd cared a little more.

"Not you, but that much is obvious," she snaps back, getting to her feet from the bench on the courtyard she'd been sat, only half listening to Harry and Ron while the group waited for Hermione.

"And now you're going to run off all scared? Pathetic,"

"If you think I'm scared of you, you're wrong,"

"Not quite, I think you're scared of my friends," Lilliana speaks, pulling away from Draco's grip and walking towards the girl "I think you've heard what we do to scum like you and you are scared,"

"Don't talk to her like that," Ron demands, jumping to his feet and Harry doing the same

"Oh, oh Dray isn't that precious? Mudblood's hot herself a boyfriend," Lilliana smirks

"Don't call her that," Harry snarls.

"My, my my, it's  a love triangle," she continues.

What hurts the most isn't the words, it's Draco. Draco who is still sat next to Blaise, Theo and Daphne with a passive look on his face.

The girl reaches for her wand but Harry's hand jumps out to stop her.

"She's not worth it. None of them are," Harry grunts, really he means that Draco isn't and she shouldn't let him hurt her, pulling her away with Ron following behind, muttering something about sticking their heads up their asses.

She heard clear as day, Draco Malfoy's laughter ringing through the air. He was truly just like them. Yet, when she glances over shoulder he raises an eyebrow in question asking if she's okay, his friend's blissfuly unaware of the interaction. It takes everything in her to keep her face blank and turn back around.

It's awkward and silent as I wait for you to say But what I need to hear now, your sincere apology When you mean it, I'll believe it If you text it, I'll delete it Let's be clear Oh, I'm not comin' back You're taking seven steps here

She is anxious as she sits in her seat in potions, waiting for Draco to arrive as she bounces her leg. She doesn't know what will happen when he arrives.

Will he act like everything is normal?

Will he apologise for his friends behaviour?

Will he apologise for joining in?

Will he ignore her?

Will he mock her just as they had?

She glances up at the feeling of someone watching her. Eyes landing on Harry who has turned around to see if Draco has arrived, knowing his friend was anxious. He smiles. A comforting and warm smile that she tries to reciprocate although she fears it probably looked more like a grimace.

Draco sits down next to her, immediately his eyes are on her. He can tell she's nervous. Her bouncing leg. Her eyes staring straight ahead. Her bottom lip drawn between her teeth as she chews on it. Anxious habits she hadn't displayed due to his presence in a long time. His heart hurts a little.

He reaches his hand out, placing it gently on her knee to stop the bouncing and is pleasantly surprised when she doesn't pull away from his touch.

"It's just me. You don't need to be nervous," He whispers, butterflies in his stomach when she eases immediately, melting into his touch. Unable to stop herself when she loves him so much

"I wouldn't do anything to hurt you," he whispers.

His heart sinks when that seems to pull her to her senses. She jerks he knee away from him.

"You already did," she speaks lowly and before he can reply Snape has entered the room.

Even when the class are told to work with their partner she remains silent. Draco doing the same. Unsure what to say. Glancing at her and his chest feels tight. He hurt her. He never wanted to do that and god did he love her and everything was a mess.

The class draws to an end and he knows this is his one shot at saying something.

"Look, I never should have ended it. I should have been brave enough to tell my friends- I just- I can't explain it. I'm sorry," He speaks quietly, hiding his voice from the other students in the loud hustle and bustle.

"That's not what I want you to apologise for," She states, shoving her book into her bag.

"Then for what?"

"You let them talk to me like that, you laughed along. That hurt me Draco. You have all this power over them and let you allow them to talk to me like that days after you tell me you care about me,"

She turns on her heel and marches towards her friends who are waiting for her leaving Draco to wonder how he ever thought that anything he was doing was okay.

The seven things I hate about you You're vain, your games, you're insecure You make me laugh, you make me cry I don't know which side to buy Your friends, they're jerks When you act like them, just know it hurts I wanna be with the one I know And the seventh thing I hate the most that you do You make me love you

Draco doesn't see her at all on Saturday although he looks for her at every meal and forces his friends to hang out in the courtyard he knows she likes.

On Sunday though, she seems to be everywhere. At breakfast eating with the twins. By the quidditch pitch as he practices and she goes into Oliver's captains office. Helping Ginny and Luna with some test prep in the library. Flirting with Dean Thomas at lunch.

It's only a matter of time before his friends say something, he knows that, and sure enough when they enter the courtyard Pansy can't keep her mouth shut.

The girls is lounging on a bench, head resting on her hand as she watches the game of exploding snap Harry and Ron are playing from their seats cross legged on the floor. Hermione is sat under the tree next to them, back against the tree as she reads a muggle fiction book. The group look utterly at peace as they enjoy the hot day.

"Oh look, everyone's favourite mudbloods," Pansy groans loudly, drawing the attention of the group.

"Shut the fuck up, Parkinson," Ron snaps, turning back to his game.

"Dean Thomas seems to quite like one of them," Daphne chimes, dropping onto the bench next to Theo a few feet away from them.

"Well he would, word on the street is that her blood isn't the only thing that's dirty. Apparently, she's a whore," Pansy jeers.

At this both Harry and Ron are on their feet, ready to defend their friend as Hermione moves to squeeze her hand comfortingly. What surprises everyone, including the crowd of people watching scene unfold, is that before the boys and Hermione can begin their defensive arguments Draco Malfoy speaks up.

"Shut up Parkinson, just cause you can't get any," He drawls, taking his seat on the bench, eyes trained to the girl who is staring back, utterly bewildered, next to Ron Weasley.

"Merlin Draco, anyone would think you fancied the girl," Pansy smirks, in her mind there was no way the boy wouldn't join in after that comment.

"Just cause I wouldn't go near you with a 10 foot pole doesn't mean you need to be so bitter. Now shut up and drop it," He commands.

Pansy blushes a little but makes one more attempt

"She's a mudblood Draco, what do you care what I say to her,"

"I told you to shut up and drop it, fucking listen to me or leave," He practically growls and Pansy finally gets the hint that he means it, sinking to her seat in humiliation.

The crowd of people watching, all of which are in awe at this point, are only more shocked to see him shoot the girl a smile before turning back to his friends, "You were talking about your mother's latest conquest Zabini," He reminds. Blaise stumbles for a second, confused as to what on the earth is happening but with one sharp look from his best friend he continues with his story.

And compared to all the great things That would take too long to write I probably should mention the seven that I like

Draco is sat alone in the corner of the library, nose in a charms textbook and essay half written in front of him. He doesn't notice anyone's presence and jumps a little when she talks.

"Can we talk?" She asks timidly, looking around the quiet room, it's late and the library is practically empty. He looks up at her with an unreadable expression "Here, I mean. I know we don't talk much in public but-" He cuts off what he is sure will be a nervous ramble

"Take a seat," He commands, it's gentle though. Soft enough she could easily say no.

She doesn't though. She takes the seat opposite him as he puts his quill down.

"What's up?" He questions

"I just wanted to thank you. For defending me earlier and getting her to stop,"

"Well, she was wrong. You aren't a whore and no one has the right to call you that," He shrugs casually

"Would you have stopped her if she hadn't said that? If she had just called me a mudblood I mean?" She asks the question timidly, fingers ringing together on the desk, she stares as she can't quite bring herself to look at him.

"Yes. You were right, I have the power to make them stop and I never did. I should have. I care about you and I like you, merlin I might even love you, and I let what everyone else thought and what they would say stop me from being happy, I do that a lot, but I never should have let them hurt you. I won't forgive myself for that,"

She glances up at him, wondering if she can believe him, but something about the look on his face and the gentleness of his eyes makes her believe him.

"Thank you,"

"I know it's probably too late, but could I ever win you back?"

"Yeah. Easily, lord knows I'm half in love with you already, but I can't put myself through it again. I can't be someone's secret," She explains, he nods "I'll see you around Draco. Thanks again,"

The seven things I like about you Your hair, your eyes, your old Levi's When we kiss, I'm hypnotized You make me laugh, you make me cry But I guess that's both I'll have to buy Your hand in mine When we're intertwined, everything's alright I wanna be with the one I know

The next two weeks the entire school seems to be watching. Curious as to why all of a sudden Draco Malfoy is smiling at her in the corridor. Why none of his friends even look at her funny. Why they are laughing together in potions. The shift in their relationship is the talk of the school and everyone seems to care.

It's a Saturday morning and she is walking towards the black lake where most the school were, her friend group included, having decided to meet them down there after she wrote back to her mother.

Draco is leaving his dorm, on his way to look for her. Draco Malfoy is a man on a mission.  A look of determination on his face and a fire in his eyes. Having received a letter from home that morning, full of complaints and faults he was done. He was done trying to be the perfect son. He was done trying to live up to expectations. He was done making himself unhappy. Most importantly, he was done pushing away love.

His eyes fall on her the second he exits the castle, she's a few metres ahead, smiling happily and greeting Neville Longbottom on her way past. Draco can just about make out her voice telling him to come and find her and some other Gryffindors later to join their drinks and party games. It was game night in the Gryffindor common room, something she had told Draco already in potions.

Neville scurries past Draco as he speeds up, falling into step beside the girl. He grabs her hand in his and continues walking like nothing is happening. She, however, stills forcing him to stop too, a few feet in front of her.

"What?" He questions casually, she looks between him and their hands a few times, blinking in confusion.

"Dray," She sighs, she wasn't angry but also she didn't want to be led on. Didn't want to be so close only to have him drop her hand the minute anyone sees.

"I don't want you to be my secret. I like you a lot and you are way too good to be anyone's secret. I don't care what anyone thinks, not my friends, not your friends, not my parents. You mean everything to me and I'm not letting you slip through my fingers, so for merlins sake let me hold you hand while I walk you to your friends," He rambles, unaware she feels like she's floating.

She grins, pressing a kiss to his cheek

"I think you missed," He smirks, she giggles a little, a sound Draco wants to hear on repeat for the rest of his life, before pressing her lips to his.

She pulls away way to quickly for Draco's liking "I like you a lot too,"

"Come back here and kiss me then," he pouts dramatically

"I thought you mentioned walking me to my friends," She teases

"You think you're so funny," he complains, hands gripping her waist to pull her back to him. Chest to chest as she beams up at him.

"No you definitely said it, besides, good boyfriends walk their girlfriends places," she smirks.

"Boyfriend?"

"You know you want to be," She shrugs

"I do," he grins "But from what I heard, good girlfriends kiss their charming and attractive boyfriends,"

"Add the word needy to the description and it'll fit you,"

"And then I get a kiss?"

"It's what the good girlfriends do," She agrees, a teasing smile on her face

"All right. Fine. When it comes to you I can be a little needy, but only for you and you can't tell anyone-" She cuts off Draco's ramble by leaning up and pressing her lips back to his.

And the seventh thing I like the most that you do You make me love you

**

Masterlist

[horansqueen]

Stuck With You - Chapter 18

Chapter 18: I Want You

🡪chapter 1  🡪chapter 2  🡪chapter 3  🡪chapter 4  🡪chapter 5  🡪chapter 6   🡪chapter 7  🡪chapter 8  🡪chapter 9  🡪chapter 10  🡪chapter 11 🡪chapter 12 🡪chapter 13 🡪chapter 14 🡪chapter 15 🡪chapter 16 🡪chapter 17

College Enemies To Lovers AU

characters // masterlist // instagrams // mood board

Any time I need to see your face I just close my eyes and I am taken to a place Where your crystal mind and magenta feelings taken shelter In the base of my spine, sweet like a chica cherry cola

I don't need to try and explain, I just hold on tight And if it happens again, I might move so slightly To the arms and the lips and the face and the human cannonball I need to, I want to

Come stand a little bit closer Breathe in and get a bit higher

Ooh, I want you I don't know if I need you But, ooh, I'd die to find out Ooh, I want you I don't know if I need you But, ooh, I'd die to find out

But a look, then a smell of perfume It's like I'm down on the floor And I don't know what I'm in for

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NIALL

                                                      My phone had been ringing and beeping constantly in the past hour. Every time I checked, though, it was a new call or message from Mandy and I was desperately trying to avoid talking to her. I knew I wouldn't be able to run away from her for too long but I was determined to at least try. I marked all her text messages as 'read' and got out of my car again, getting inside Lewis' apartment building for the second time on that day.

I felt nervous and I was not sure why, but I kept twisted the insides of my jeans pockets as the elevator moved up. My heart skipped a beat when I glanced at the spot where Devon and I kissed but I swallowed my feelings and quickly walked out of the elevator. It didn't take long for Lewis to open the door and when I walked in, I noticed he had cleaned up everything. I was impressed, especially when I remembered the mess we had made, but I didn't mention it.

"You know you don't have to come visit many times a day, mate." Lewis pointed out before his lips curled. "No need for me to get used to your ass in this apartment, your girlfriend messaged me and said it was too expensive for her."

I wanted to point out that she was not my girlfriend and never would be but the words got stuck in my throat and I decided it was better to ignore it and not fuel the fire. I took my hands off my pockets and passed one in my hair with a sigh.

"Look, Devon really needs a place to stay."

"I thought you'd be happy to keep her with you in your room." Lewis wondered with a frown.

I took a seat on the other couch, close to him and shook my head. "She wants out, okay." I explained, shaking my head slightly before sighing again and leaning my back on the couch. "I mean, she really wants to leave."

Lewis stared at me, frowning slightly more, and finally moved his upper body closer. "That's how much you love her?" he asked in a soft tone, making me shrug. "Enough to let her go?"

"Don't say stupid things."

"No, you say stupid things, Horan." he added a bit louder. "Instead to love her enough to let her go, why don't you love her enough to be honest with her? I've seen the way she's been looking at you. She's literally waiting for you to make a move."

"I've hurt her enough already okay?" I replied a bit rudely. "She wants out and if that's what she wants then that's what she'll get."

This time, Lewis didn't answer but he rolled his eyes at me, letting his back fall on the couch. "You're a fookin' idiot."

"Thanks, I know."

"You let one girl fuck you up, and then you fuck the others. Nice move." he replied again with sarcasm.

"Fine, sue me!" I let out, now getting angry. "I'm just here to ask you to send her a message again, and tell her you'll charge her half of the rent you proposed first."

Lewis raised his eyebrows at me, blinking a few times. I knew he was getting annoyed but I didn't care. "Why would I do that?"

"I'll pay you the other half." I explained, closing my eyes. "But you can't tell her! Ever."

My friend stared at me and I knew he wanted to add something about the girl that broke my heart and fucked me up to the point where I rejected any form of romantic love, but he didn't and I felt grateful for that. It's not like I was not aware that it was not a normal thing. I knew people fell in love, fucked up other people, hurt them, got their heart broken... and started all over again. Most people had this urge and this need to love and be loved, knowing they could get hurt but hoping they won't. I didn't have that need, because I felt like the happy times were not worth the pain. I couldn't lie and say Devon didn't make all my principles falter, but I was trying hard not to do to anything about it, despite how bad I was craving it... how bad I was craving her.

"Propose her a ride to school every morning." Lewis finally said, taking me out of my thoughts. I blinked a few times and frowned before shaking my head. "Seriously, do it." he continued. "If you do that, I'm good with you paying half the rent and not telling her."

I stared at him for a few seconds before looking down. I liked the idea but I was not sure she'd agree to it. I also was pretty convinced it was a bad idea. How could I stop feeling all these things for her if I spent time with her every single day? Anyway, the reason she wanted to move out of our room was because she didn't want to be around me anymore, and picking her up for school every week days sounded counterproductive.

"Why does it matter so much to you?" I finally asked, looking up at him as he got up but totally resigned to do what he asked me to do.

"Because even if you pretend the opposite, it really matters to you." Lewis confessed, making something stir in my stomach. "So, we have a deal?"

I got up too, glancing at the hand he was holding out before looking up in his eyes. I would never tell him, but if Devon agreed to let me give her a ride to school every morning, it would make my heart lighter. As much as I hated to admit it, I took so many decisions with my heart recently that there was no doubt I'd end up in deep shit very soon. Did the fact that Devon was about to move out make me change my mind? Would it turn me into the pathetic human being I was whenever she was near? The same one I used to be around my ex girlfriend right before and even after she broke my heart?

"Deal." I just let out firmly, grabbing his hand and shaking it hard once before letting it go.

"I want my money every saturday and you're the one driving here to give it to me, making it your problem."

"Ever heard of bank transfers?" I asked with a scoff.

"I want it cash."

I knew he just wanted me to come over and I understood why but I was too mentally exhausted to argue and maybe it would also give me the chance to see Devon. I should run away from here and break all the deals I had made with Lewis but I couldn't. I was tired to fight, I was tired to repress everything I was feeling in hope it would disappear.

"Okay, but you don't ask for the money in front of Devon."

"Who do you think I am? An idiot?"

I chuckled but rolled my eyes before nodding, grateful for what he was doing. It was tough to push away someone who made me feel so many things. It felt like every fiber of my body, everyone around me, and even fate and destiny made it impossible for me to stay far from Devon. I knew deep down that I couldn't stay physically away from her forever. It felt like my own body was going to rot or die if she'd stay far, and I knew it was a stupid example but those were the only words I could come up with. Perhaps it was not really that. Perhaps it was just that my heart would stop beating, but either way, I was not ready to let go. Not completely.

I wanted to thank Lewis for everything but just as I was about to, someone knocked at the door, making me jump slightly. I moved away to let Lewis pass but when I heard the voice on the other side, I felt my heart jump in my chest.

"Lewis, are you there?" Mandy's voice let out in a soft tone. "I forgot something last night!"

I placed my hand on Lewis' chest as he walked past me and looked up in his eyes, shaking my head. "I'm not here." I mouthed, making him frown and throw his hands up.

"You're gonna have to face her at some point, right now is perfect." he replied in a whisper, walking up to the door and opening it before I could think of something else to do or a good place to hide.

As soon as her eyes met mine, I pushed my hands in my pockets and her face lighted up.

"Niall, hey, tried to reach you all day!"

"Yea, sorry my.. phone was on silent." I lied, sending her a small smile. "I was about to call you back as soon as I left."

"I just feel very lonely today." she pointed out, sending me puppy eyes as she took a step closer, putting her hand on my chest. "Do you want to sleep in my room tonight?"

My eyes roamed on her face for a few seconds as she gripped my shirt. I knew looking at her should make me feel something, but nothing happened. It was not because I was used to her, or because I had had too much sex encounters with her, no. It was simply because I felt nothing for her and probably never felt anything except lust. The fact that i didn't feel any desire for her anymore was a shock and my lips parted as I blinked a few times.

"I'm busy... tonight." I cleared my throat and took a step back, turning to Lewis to hug him lightly and tell him goodbye. I could feel Mandy's eyes on my back and it suddenly made me feel uncomfortable. When I turned back to her, she raised her eyebrows and I smiled. "Do you need a ride?"

"Yea, thank you! Let me just grab my bra really quick."

I frowned, turning to Lewis who just shrugged as Mandy disappeared in the hall only to reappear a minute of two later as she pushed her bra in her purse. I didn't ask because I didn't want to know and as we left, I glanced at Lewis' phone and moved my chin in its direction. He just nodded and I followed Mandy to the elevator.

I watched as she leaned against the wall in the exact same spot Devon and I had kissed but closed my eyes as images invaded my brain, appearing behind my eyelids like a movie I could never get tired of.

"Are you okay, Niall?"

I got out of my thoughts, trying to push away the thoughts in my head where Devon was straddling me and I was kissing her lips gently after a claustrophobia crisis, to turn to Mandy. "Yea, I'm good."

We walked together until my car and I drove in silence. She put her feet up on the dashboard and I felt my lips curl into a small grimace at how annoyed it made me but when I parked, I turned to her with a serious face.

"Look, Mandy, I think we need a break."

"A break?" she let out before chucking. "Niall, we're not dating."

"I know I just.. I can't do this anymore."

She tilted her head to lean it on the bench before turning her body slightly my way. She sighed low and a sad smile appeared on her lips before she licked them. For some stupid reason, it made me think of Devon. Again.

"It's because of that girl, right?"

"No." I lied, shrugging both shoulders and looking away, making Mandy laugh.

"I didn't even name her and you knew who I was talking about." she pointed out, making me grimace again. "It's okay, Niall, I see how you two look at each other. I didn't think she was your type but hey," she shrugged. "I get it."

I stared at her for a few more seconds, just trying to process what she was saying and when I frowned, she started laughing, rolling her eyes.

"Don't make this face! What did you expect?" she asked, an amused smile spread on her lips. "It's not like I was in love with you or anything!"

Without waiting, she got out of my car and I finally did the same. We walked together near the building and when we were about to part, I turned to her and sent her an uncomfortable smile.

"So... bye?"

She laughed again, shaking her head, and took a step closer. "I'm really gonna miss your ass." she let out, pinching it and making me tense immediately. She got on her tiptoe and pressed her mouth on mine, taking me my surprise, before taking a step back and raising her eyebrows. "Bye!"

I stood there, motionless, a sensation of relief washing over me as some of the stress I wasn't even aware I had disappeared suddenly. I pushed my hands in my pockets and when I turned back to get inside, I noticed Devon not so far from me, staring at me. My lips parted and my heart dropped when I realized she had seen what had just happened with Mandy and I was tempted to tell her it was not what she was thinking but instead, I swallowed my words as she walked closer.

"Your friend Lewis messaged me." she explained, glancing in Mandy's direction before looking back in my eyes.

I looked down at her, my eyes roaming on her face and lingering a bit too long on her lips. Why couldn't I get her off my mind? Why was it so tough for me not to grab her and kiss her right here and right now?

I started thinking about my ex girlfriend and the feelings I had whenever she was near, and it made me realize how different the two emotions were. The way I loved my ex girlfriend was needy, pathetic and ugly. The way I would do anything she wanted just because I was scared she would leave, the way she made me jealous on purpose, or simply did anything she wanted without caring if it would hurt me. I fell in love with someone who used me and it was for that same person that I had given up on love. Even now, after months of her breaking my heart, she still had an impact on me. She was still controlling me without even knowing. I was letting what she did to me ruin my life and I had no idea how to get out of it.

"Oh yea?"

"Mmhm, he said he cut the rent in half, and I think I can afford it."

"Alright." I just said, sending her a small smile.

"You don't seem surprised." she asked with a frown, tilting her head.

"No I mean, I know Lewis, he's cool." I shrugged, sending her a sincerely smile that she slowly sent back.

The way Devon made me feel was different. She made me feel good in a way I was not sure I understood yet. I could relate to her, and even if she didn't talk much about herself, she still let me in, somehow, by allowing me to look at her art and tell her how it made me feel. She allowed me to kiss her whenever I wanted and push her away after, as if she was always ready to give me a chance... a chance that I never had the guts to take. I was just realizing that maybe I was wrong and she was leaving.

"Oh, by the way, one of my friends has a mattress he doesn't need, so if you're interested, I can bring it to Lewis' apartment this week?"

Her eyebrows raised and her lips curled on the right. "Really?"

"Mmhm, oh, and since you don't have a car, I propose a ride to school every morning, how's that?"

This time though, she shook her head. "No, I can't accept that."

"Come on, I drive near there every morning anyway for breakfast, so it's all good."

It was not a complete lie but it was not the whole truth either, but I didn't care.

"No really, I can't."

"So you can accept Lewis cutting half the price of the rent, and a mattress from a guy you don't know, but when it comes to accepting my rides to school, it's too much?" I asked jokingly, a bigger smile on my face.

It made her chuckle and roll her eyes. "Fine!" she gave in, making my heart jump in my chest. "But let me pay you, okay?"

"Okay, but I decide the price." I explained, taking an other step closer. Her body was so close to mine now that if I moved, It could brush against hers. "I want that painting."

"My.. my painting? The one I wanted to throw away?"

"Mmhm," I admitted, nodding gently. "I want you to sign it, and give it to me. In exchange, you get rides and breakfast every mornings of the week."

She shook her head slightly, still smiling, and brought her shoulders up, near her cheeks. It was so endearing I almost kissed her right there.

"Niall, this painting is horrible. It'll never be worth anything."

"Deal?" I asked, ignoring her short rant.

Her traits softened and I brought my hand up, running my thumb on her cheek gently. I didn't know why I was doing that, I didn't know why I felt the need to touch her. All I knew was that feeling her skin against mine brought in me a feeling I was trying so hard to suppress, and I immediately felt the need to write a song. I let my arm fall back on my side, realizing she was not smiling anymore. Her lips were parted and she just nodded very slowly.

I suddenly got scared of everything this could imply. Would I just close off again and hurt her? I knew it was a possibility. I knew I could wake up in the morning realizing my mistake and turning into the cold hearted man I was with her only a few days ago. What would happen, then?

"Okay." she whispered. "Deal."

[seagreen-meets-grey]

When Lightning Strikes Ch. 17

When your life is nothing but a cloudless sky, lightning can come and strike you so unexpectedly, you won’t even know what hit you.

Or: When Hiccup and Astrid meet, it is as if lightning strikes.

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5] [Chapter 6] [Chapter 7] [Chapter 8] [Chapter 9] [Chapter 10] [Chapter 11] [Chapter 12] [Chapter 13] [Chapter 14] [Chapter 15] [Chapter 16] [Chapter 18] [Chapter 19] [Chapter 20]

Crossposted on ao3 and ff.net

_______________

“I’m in love with you.”

Fresh raindrops were hitting the windscreen in an increasing rhythm, the backdrop to her thoughts.

“I’m in love with you.”

She turned on the wipers.

“But I can’t be your friend anymore.”

His voice was haunting her, words replaying in her ears over and over, accompanied by an electric jolt stopping her heart for a beat every single time. She almost anticipated a flash of lightning on the horizon, a crack of thunder rolling through her chest.

The drive back to Berk had never felt this long, the allowed driving speed never this slow. Eyes on the road, she fumbled for her phone, managing to connect it to the car one-handed. There was a call that absolutely could not wait.

It rang a few times, then cut off. Did she have no reception here? Didn’t he? Did he decline her call? Nervously tapping her steering wheel, Astrid flung the phone onto the passenger seat. She would try again if she got stuck at a traffic light. But traffic flowed freely and not much later, she parked in the same spot as mere hours before. She couldn’t believe so little time had passed since she had gotten ready for her lunch not-date (that had totally been an unofficial date).

Dashing through the rain, she quickly made it to the front door and rang the doorbell. But after fifteen minutes of repeatedly pressing the button, she concluded that he either wasn’t home or really did not want to open the door. She tried his phone again, but it just kept ringing and ringing. Which was weird, because he had specifically asked her to call him back, hadn’t he? Why would he not answer her calls now? Had he changed his mind, was he mad that she’d just left like that?

She racked her brain for where he could be, but the weather wasn’t leaving her a lot of options. He couldn’t be at work because it was a Sunday. She didn’t know where any of his friends lived. Hell, she only knew two names, maybe three if she counted the ex-girlfriend. Perhaps he’d gone to the forest again, despite the weather?

But his car was still parked to the side. Was he home after all? She tried the doorbell again, then rang for his neighbor. They could let her in so she could pound at his door, just in case his bell wasn’t working.

“Hello?” came a grumpy voice out of the speaker.

“Ah, yes, hi. I’m trying to get a hold of your neighbor, but he’s not opening. Could you let me in, please?”

“No.”

Briefly taken aback, she blinked a couple times. “I really need to–”

“I don’t know you. If they’re not opening, I won’t either. Good day.” The speaker crackled and went silent.

“Yeah, fuck you too,” she mumbled. “You got great neighbors, man.”

He still wasn’t answering her calls. At this point, she didn’t know whether to be annoyed or worried. Texting him a quick ‘where are you????’, she returned to her car and deliberated her next step. One option was to just wait here for him to get back. Call him over and over again until she got a reaction.

“Ugh!” With a frustrated groan, she threw her head back and closed her eyes. There was a way for her to reach someone who knew him, but even if she was successful, it would be a mighty awkward phone call and she would have to swallow a bit of pride.

“I’m in love with you.”

“Dammit!” She hit her steering wheel, accidentally setting off the horn. Hopefully, it had made Hiccup’s neighbor jump.

The next call went unanswered as well, but that only boosted her determination. There was no stopping her, not so close to her happy ending. She wanted to hear his voice, wanted to look into his wonderful eyes and scream at the top of her lungs, let out all her suppressed feelings that she’d been harboring for him ever since the moment his presence had first struck her like lightning. Three words, one breath. The clear answer he needed to hear from her, the one she needed to speak out loud.

She found Dagur’s contact in her list and sent him a short text, hoping he would help her out first and ask annoying questions later. And lo and behold, twelve minutes later, she had Heather Oswald’s number.

She picked up after the fourth ring. “Hello?”

“Hi. This is Astrid Hofferson, um... We’ve met a couple times, I’m–”

“Yeah,” Heather interrupted her in a tone Astrid couldn’t decipher, “I know who you are.”

“Oh, okay. Great. Uh, I’m looking for Hiccup, actually, and he’s not home or answering his phone. You’re the only person I could get a hold of who might know where he is or…”

“I have no idea.”

“Ah, well then, do you have an idea where I could look?”

The line went silent for a moment. “Without a clue about what’s going on, it’s hard to narrow it down.”

“Oh. Well, maybe–”

“Look, Astrid?” Heather interrupted her. “I know it’s not my place to say. But Hiccup is one of my best friends and he’s been pretty depressed because of you for the past two years. He… cares about you a lot.” Astrid tried to get a word in, but Heather didn’t let herself be interrupted. “I know you two are friends, but you’re not doing him any favors as long as you’re not honest with him.

“Heather, I-”

“Whatever it is you want from him, please tell him so he can stop driving himself crazy.”

“Yes, I know, that’s why I’m looking for him!”

“You are? Good. You might not be aware of it, but you have the power to absolutely break him. I’d rather you didn’t.”

Astrid gulped. “Yeah, believe it or not, he actually has the same power over me. Why do you think I’m calling his ex-girlfriend for help?”

Heather chuckled. “I haven’t heard from him this weekend, but I can think of a few others who might have. I can give you their numbers.”

“Thank you, seriously!”

“I’m doing it for him. Good luck.”

The line went dead and Astrid let out the tension in her shoulders with a sigh of relief. She didn’t have a new lead, but she had gained new options. And she’d just gotten the dad talk from her ex’s best friend’s sister.

Her phone buzzed with a few messages from an unsaved number, sending her a few contacts. She assumed the two people with Hiccup’s last name were his parents and decided to make them her last resort since there was no need to worry them about their son being uncharacteristically unavailable. Besides, they didn’t even know her.

Discovering she actually knew the other people Heather had referred her to, she decided to call Fishlegs first, hoping for not another lecture on how to treat one of his best friends. The one had been uncomfortable enough. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Hiccup, even unintentionally. He was way too important to her, had taken root inside her heart the moment he’d first smiled at her.

She still remembered how he’d been able to make her forget about the sea of people around her in a matter of seconds, joking around about something trivial, grasping her full attention so easily she’d even blinded out her own fiancé, who’d been right there next to her. Looking back, she could only shake her head at her own stubbornness in admitting her immediate attraction and the connection that had been there from the moment their eyes had met. Her skin tingled at the memory of that bolt of lightning striking her to the core…

With a wince, she pulled herself from her daydream, concentrating on the task at hand and making the next call. Fishlegs picked up almost immediately, voice a little wary of the unknown number calling him on a Sunday evening. The horizon was darkening gradually, the last rays of sunlight drowning in the incoming wave of night, the streetlamps outside flickering on one after the other.

Fishlegs didn’t know where Hiccup was. “Maybe his phone is dead? He sometimes forgets to charge it before it’s too late.”

“Nope, it’s ringing. The signal’s getting through. Which means that’s not it.” She didn’t want to waste her time theorizing about why he wasn’t picking up. She wanted to find him, then she could ask him and punch him for leaving her hanging like this. “But do you know where he could have gone on a Sunday night while it’s raining?”

“Hm. You say his car is home?”

“Yes.”

“Well, Snotlout lives nearby, that’s an old friend of his–”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know him.” Tucking her phone between her jaw and shoulder, she started her car. “Where does he live?”

Fishlegs gave her the directions and offered to stay on the phone so she could keep him updated, but she quickly thanked him and hung up before pulling out of her parking spot. This was the worst scavenger hunt ever. At least she could cross calling Snotlout off her list.

Severely hoping to either catch Hiccup this time or at least get a solid lead, she pushed the doorbell ten seconds long and then hit it repeatedly in a short span of time until she heard the static of the receiver.

“Whoever the fuck you are, fuck you. Hiccup, is that you? I want my jacket.” Well, so much for finding Hiccup here.

“No, it’s Astrid, we met once, I think you tried to flirt with me.��

“Wait, the Astrid? Hot Astrid? Hot-strid?”

“Call me that again and you’ll find out how hot my fist is!”

“Okay, okay.” She noted with satisfaction how he was trying to cover up that he was intimidated. “What are you doing here? Came here to get a taste of the Snotman?”

Deciding to ignore his immediate new attempt at flirting (she would handle that another time, for sure), she just rolled her eyes. “Have you seen Hiccup?”

Expecting the same answer she got from everyone else, she was surprised when he said, “Yep. He was here.”

“When?” She jumped on the information, leaning closer to the receiver.

“I don’t know, some time in the past couple hours? I was busy, I don’t check the clock on a Sunday.”

“Did he say where he was going?”

“Out.” Oh, she wanted to break the door in and slap him.

“But where, Snotlout?!” A dog started barking very closely to the intercom, making Astrid flinch away.

“Shut up, Hookfang! I don’t know, he wouldn’t tell me. Sit, you dumb dog! He just came by for a jacket, he was kinda drenched. Pretty stupid, actually, because he had an umbrella and it wasn’t even raining when I looked outside.”

She bit her lip and frowned. So he was out somewhere, probably still in the rain. Great, so she just had to drive through town and search all the streets of Berk until she found him. At least she had some kind of solid plan now.

“Thanks, Snotlout.”

His answer was drowned out by the barking dog, then the intercom fell silent with a crackling static, but she was already sprinting back to her car. She tried calling Hiccup again, but then gave up with a groan; she wouldn’t reach him. He hadn’t read her text yet, either. So what now, call his parents if he had walked there? She didn’t even know if they lived in Berk.

Reaching for her phone again, she replayed his message. The butterflies tumbled through her stomach again when he said the five words she would never grow tired of hearing. There was the sound of traffic and rain in the background, but that didn’t help a lot, so she replayed it again. And there it was, another lead – he said he’d been at her parents’ place, looking for her. Of course! Maybe he’d mentioned more to whoever had answered the door.

She sped through town, parking right in front of the front door, something her father hated. But right now, she couldn’t care less. Fumbling with the keys for a minute, she pushed the door open and yelled into the house.

“Mom! Dad! Anyone?!”

Her father stuck his head through the door to the living room, glass of wine in hand, wearing his comfy couch pants. “Hello, daughter. We were wondering if you were still showing up for dinner.”

“Sorry, I forgot to cancel, I had something important to do.” She trudged down the hallway to the living room, leaving dirty footprints on the floor.

“Astrid, your shoes!” her father chided her, but she ignored it.

“Was Hiccup here?”

“Who?”

Her mother turned around on the couch. “Yes, your boyfriend was here. He was looking for you.”

Astrid scooched by her dad who almost spilled his wine. “When? What did he say?”

Wilma clucked her tongue in disapproval, shaking her head at her daughter’s wet shoes, two steps from the new carpet.

“Mom.”

Frederick put a hand on her shoulder, holding his glass out of her reach. “Why don’t you take your shoes off and join us? This crime thriller is very entertaining and there’s more wine in the fridge–”

“Mom!”

“Like I said, he was looking for you. I don’t remember when, but it was still light outside. He didn’t say what he wanted, though, and left as soon as I said you weren’t here.”

“Who?” Frederick repeated, confusion written clearly on his face. “The young man you spoke to earlier? What was that about a boyfriend?”

Astrid didn’t have time for explanations to be exchanged. “Which direction did he leave in? This is very, very important, mom!”

“What’s going on, dear? Why don’t you–”

Astrid rolled her eyes with an impatient growl, contemplating threatening to wipe her feet on the carpet if her mother didn’t just come across with the information, but figured that would only spark an entirely different discussion. “Mom, I swear – please just tell me, please!” The desperation had to be showing in her eyes because her mother gave in with a sigh.

“Down the street to Marram Lane, he was on foot so my guess is he was heading for the bus.”

That didn’t make her chase any less frustrating, but it was better than nothing. “Anything else?”

“No–”

“Okay, thanks, bye!” She dashed past her dad who took a surprised step back. Before the front door closed behind her, she could hear him complain about his spilled wine on the new carpet.

Jumping into her car, she deliberated showing Hiccup’s profile picture to every bus driver she could catch, until one of them remembered him and where he got off the bus. But chances were he’d taken the route home and was already back there while she was looking for bread crumbs all over Berk. So she decided on one last attempt. If he didn’t open his door now, she would go home and probably not sleep all night.

If it hadn’t been for the red light near the park, she would have missed it. Tapping her finger against the steering wheel, she absentmindedly glanced outside while waiting for green.

It was the jacket that caught her eye. Chipped print of faded red flames climbing up the dark sleeves, wide and short on a body too tall and lean for the cut. It was him.

The umbrella shaded him from the light of the streetlamps, but she immediately made out the wild auburn hair, the line of his jaw, the slope of his nose, eyes cast down. He was heading for the park, on a shortcut to his house that she couldn’t take with her car.

A honk from behind her alerted her to the green light and she stepped on it, crossing the intersection and pulling over onto the sidewalk as soon as she got the chance to.

She ran, only just bothering to lock her car. The rain was coming down in buckets and she splashed her entire right leg when she stepped in an overly large puddle, but that wouldn’t slow her down.

“Hey!” she yelled. “Hiccup! Wait!”

He had almost disappeared behind the next corner and a few trees when he suddenly stopped and turned around. “Astrid?”

Panting, she came to a stop. “Finally. I looked- I looked everywhere for you.”

“Oh- oh yeah. I’m so sorry.” He pulled his phone from his pocket and showed her the screen. There was a large crack right down the middle and her unsuccessful calls finally made sense. He hadn’t been suddenly ghosting her, after all. “Did… Um, did you get my…”

“I got your message.” Her instincts told her to just grab him and haul him in for a kiss like she’d wanted to for so long, but he’d asked her to talk and she wouldn’t make any rash moves; there was just too much on the line.

For a beat, he looked at her nervously, before he noticed the water running down her face, darkening her hair and clothes. He stepped closer, holding his umbrella over the two of them.

“Thanks.” She wiped wet strands of hair out of her face. Every now and then, a gust of wind blew cold rain underneath the umbrella like a lawn sprinkler that had lost its rhythm. She was exhausted. She’d had a very long day.

It didn’t escape her how his eyes briefly dropped down her face, awakening the memories of his lips brushing hers earlier that day, numbing the tips of her fingers for the fraction of a second, before he averted his face. “I’m sorry if I sprung all this on you, but…”

“No, I’m the one who has to apologize.” His eyes settled back on hers and the shiver running down her spine had nothing to do with the weather. “You were absolutely right, I had been running from my conflicts, and my feelings. I went home to talk to Eret.” She took a deep breath. “We decided to break up.”

His eyes widened in surprise. “Oh, I… Was… Was it true, then? About him and…”

“Dana? That wasn’t what I thought it was. You were right about that, too.”

“Well, I’ll have you know I am always right about everything,” he said with a one-shouldered shrug and the hint of a shy grin.

“Hmm, sure.” Her lips were twitching and the invisible string attached to her heart was pulling at her chest. The rain was cold and the heat his body was emanating was driving her insane. The proximity to him, the way he was looking at her, the light of the streetlamps reflecting golden specks in his deep green eyes sending a parade of tingles over her skin. “He hadn’t been cheating on me any more than I cheated on him.”

His brows furrowed; head cocked to the side ever so slightly.

“Emotionally. Not with Dana. And that’s only one of the reasons me and him didn’t work out.”

Shaking his head, his frown deepened. “So… What does that mean now? Astrid, why are you here?”

She mirrored his expression. “Because you wanted to talk–”

“No, I mean, why are you here? In the rain, soaked to the bone? You could have called later, or tomorrow, or any other time.”

“No, I couldn’t,” she replied, trying to lay all the sincerity she felt into her voice. “Like I said, I’ve been running away for way too long.” The world began to blur around her, the traffic and the rain faded, vision narrowing in on him, capturing his gaze so intently, it caused her palms to sweat and her hands to start shaking from the intensity. “I love you. Okay? I love you! I want to be with you, Hiccup! I- I love you.” Her heart was rapidly pumping liquid lightning through her veins from finally saying the words out loud.

The earth stopped spinning as she looked at him, waiting for a reaction. His lips were slightly parted, eyes posing as windows to his soul, alive and starry, burning into her like fireworks into the summer night. With bated breath, knees weakening under his gaze, she felt the electricity buzz around her, charging for the final blow. Seconds passed, small eternities, in which she couldn’t move, the current pinning her to the spot.

Then, he suddenly surged forward, grabbing her face with both hands, and lightning crashed through her as they finally connected in a blinding flash of blue and white. Her chest exploded; high voltage was coursing through her every nerve, every vein, blood alive, heart pounding in sync with his; it was like their souls were magnets, caught in each other’s magnetic field, too strong to disconnect.

Her heart was soaring, quaking, pulsating, the world empty but for them. Their heavy breaths and the deafening thunder in her soul the only sound reaching her ears. Space and time became foreign concepts, the universe narrowing down to where they stood, hands roaming over shoulders, necks, limbs and through hair, unable to linger, always seeking out more, lips chasing lips.

She had to hold onto him as the ground disappeared underneath her feet and she went falling, flying, tumbling through the clouds. Her stomach was doing somersaults, backflips, pirouettes; the lightning strike had left her blind. She couldn’t get enough of his touch, lungs screaming for air, but she couldn’t care less about breathing, reconnecting with his lips after every hasty intake of air, drowning in the feeling of wonder, of pure euphoria.

The only thing she knew to be real was the warmth of his body, the passion that let their lips collide over and over again until she felt dizzy from the lack of oxygen and the intense electric current running through their bodies like one.

Eyes still closed, they eventually parted for much required air, their foreheads touching, breaths mingling. Her hands were slowly sliding from his neck, resting over his erratic heartbeat, mirroring hers. His fingers trailed down her spine, settling around her waist.

“Did you feel that?” Her voice was shaking.

“The lightning?”

Her eyes fluttered open and her chest swelled with affection at the raw emotion in his eyes and the fact that he felt as much for her as she did for him. She nodded with a gulp.

“I did.” He lifted a hand to her face, gently wiping something hot and salty from her cheek that she hadn’t even noticed herself. “Is this real?”

“I certainly hope so.”

“Hey, if not, at least we’re stuck in the same dream, right?”

“Right.” Getting lost in his gaze again, she blinked when he suddenly cleared his throat and looked around, as if remembering that there was a whole universe out of their wonderful, perfect little bubble.

“We should probably go someplace dry.” The umbrella was discarded somewhere on the ground, dirty and forgotten. “I keep getting drenched today, how is that?!”

The laughter breaking out of her and the look he gave her in return were nothing short of breathtaking, and she wondered if she was ever going to get used to that, already addicted to everything about him, everything he was doing to her. “My car is back there.” She pointed in a general direction over her shoulder.

“Okay.” He leaned down and softly pecked her lips again, followed by another toe-curling, heart-stopping, world-shaking kiss, slow and deep, her fingers clutching at his soaked shirt. Their noses brushed, wet and cold. “Okay,” he repeated himself in a whisper and stepped away enough to entwine their hands, starting towards where she had pointed.

The skin of their interlaced fingers was frigid, but Astrid did not feel the cold. She just felt… free.

His thumb brushed over her knuckles as she steered him back to her car and the contact crackled through her nerves like an inextinguishable fire. Just this morning, she’d been shaken by her own confession to herself, still anxious over the fight she’d had with Hiccup the day before. Entire lifetimes had passed since then.

Glancing at him, she caught his eyes and the blinding smile on his lips. Oh, those lips. She had discovered a new drug and she was already high on it. With a weak fist, she punched his shoulder. “That’s for breaking your phone.” He blushed, rubbing his neck with his free hand. With her own, she fished her car keys from her uncomfortably wet jeans, pushing the button and glancing over him once more. “And what the hell are you wearing?!”

_______________

- End of Part 2 -

_______________

[viastro]

there for you | chwe vernon hansol

ミ★ synopsis: in which you can’t admit you’re in love with your best friend, vernon, so joshua takes matters into his own hands.

ミ★ genre: best friends to lovers!au, humor, fluff, some angst

ミ★ warnings: none!

ミ★ word count: 3,752

ミ★ pairings: vernon x female reader

ミ★ notes: hi guys! I just wanted to start off by saying thank you so much for following me! I just hit 100 followers last night and that was really crazy to me HAHA. It really means so much to me and I’m so grateful that 100 people like my writing, so thank you so much ! I hope you enjoy this oneshot for vernon! <3

“I just think that megalodon is still out there, like what if they’re just swimming at the bottom of the ocean!” You exclaim, Vernon turning to look at you with a scoff. 

“You’re crazy, there’s no way that big ass shark bitch is still alive.” You frown at those words, choosing to shove him off your bed as a response. 

“BRUH.” Vernon shouts from your carpeted floor, and you let out a content sigh. 

“Don’t disrespect my boy megalodon like that.” You simply tell him, and you can feel him roll his eyes from your floor. “Don’t roll your eyes at me!” You say, leaning off your bed to point at him.

He gives you an evil grin, and before you know it, he’s grabbed your arm and pulled you down on top of him. He lets out a loud, “OOF!” and you laugh in his face, making him chuckle and roll you off of him. 

“I was not expecting you to literally knock the breath out of me. Holy fuck I wasn’t ready.” Vernon groans and you giggle, staring up at the worn out glow in the dark stars on your ceiling.

You and Vernon became friends in your freshman year of high school. You met each other through your mutual friend Joshua, who may have had secret matchmaking intentions, and the two of you instantly clicked. You started hanging out after school, going to the library to study together, joining drama club for fun but getting kicked out for being too loud during the actual play itself. 

You and Vernon are quite literally two peas in a pod (or is the phrase three peas in a pod?) Either way, you’re best friends. This is proven from the fact that you’re both in your last year of college, about to graduate and obtain your bachelor’s degree, and are still hanging out just the same. You both almost got an apartment together, but you decided to room by yourself and Vernon would room with Joshua. However, it’s almost as if you guys live together anyways by how much you go over to his apartment and he goes to yours. 

No matter how busy you both are, you still try and make time to see each other. Especially on Fridays, those were your cooking nights. Joshua joins in on this tradition as well, considering that it involves eating food. The three of you research recipes to offer to the table on Friday, whoever’s recipe gets the most votes, then you guys make it. It’s the highlight of your week, if you’re being honest.

Those around you have always thought you and Vernon were dating at some point in knowing the both of you, but you and him have never made any move to push your friendship into something more. The only thing you guys have done is be each other's first kiss, which is actually a very anticlimactic story. no it’s not.

It was the winter of senior year, you and Vernon were making it a mission to build an igloo due to the recent heavy snowfall that hit Seoul. You were focused on building the igloo, but Vernon had other ideas.

“Vernon, please! I wanna at least get this base layer done-” You’re cut off when you get hit in the face with a snowball, knocking you over from your crouched position. You close your eyes, hearing Vernon’s loud laugh at your tragic fate.

“I’m gonna kill you Chwe Vernon.” You mutter, standing up and making a snowball. 

“If you can catch me yn!” He taunts, thus beginning your chase around his backyard. 

“I swear to god! I just wanted to make an igloo!” You yell, laughing when he slips and falls backwards, knocking the wind out of him. You run up to him, placing your snowball right on top of his nose. He lets out a small laugh, making you giggle as well. He grabs your arm and pulls you down so that you’re laying beside him in the cold snow. 

“Have you ever thought about the fact that we’re eighteen, and still haven’t had our first kiss yet?” Vernon asks you, turning to glance at you. You stare at the small snowflakes falling, watching your breath expand into the sky due to the cold.

“What makes you think I haven’t had my first kiss yet?” You challenge, turning your head to look back at him. He scoffs at that, immediately calling out your lie, “Yeah, okay. Says the girl who literally ran away from her crush when he tried to give her back her pencil.” 

You sit up, hitting his stomach and he lets out a loud laugh, “You’re gonna look at me and tell me that I’m wrong?” He asks, sitting up as well and turning to face you.

“I mean, you’re not. But still! I hate that memory with a passion.” You say with a pout, and he smiles at you. “Why would you even bring up that topic though?” You ask and he shrugs, turning away.

“I don’t know. I was gonna ask if we could be each other’s first kiss, to get it over with, ya know?” Your eyes widen once his proposition falls past his lips. The tips of his ears are red, and you can’t tell if it’s because of the cold, or because of what he just suggested, or maybe both. Either way, they’re red, and your face is very warm.

“You’re crazy.” You sputter and he shakes his head.

“It’s not a bad idea though, like if anyone asks we could say that we’ve had our first kiss. We don’t even need to mention that we were each other’s first kiss! This is strictly for the sake of our egos.” Vernon says, and you hate how right he sounds. 

“Ugh, fine.” You mutter and Vernon’s eyes widen, turning to look at you to make sure you are serious.

“R-really?” 

“I’m about to take it back if you don’t kiss me now.” You state, turning towards him and closing your eyes. “See! My eyes are even closed, just get it over with.” 

Vernon lets out a nervous chuckle, taking in the visual of you with snowflakes on your hair, the snowflake on the tip of nose, and your ridiculously pretty lips. He knew that he didn’t have feelings for you, and that this was simply a… platonic… kiss, but he knew this image would be ingrained in his mind for the rest of his life.

He reaches his hand out, slowly brushing it against your cheek. You let out a small huff of air through your lips, and he smiles. That’s when he decides to lean in and give you both your very first kiss.

“Oh shit, I have to go get ready.” Vernon says, snapping you back to reality. He gets up off the floor, and you stare at him with a dazed expression.

“Why? It’s only 5-”

“I have a date tonight.” He tells you with a small sheepish smile, and you feel your heart slowly sink into your ass.

“Deadass? With who?” You ask, feeling a strange sense of DEATH linger in your ass.

“You know that one girl I partnered with in my intro to literature class, Minji? I asked her out the other day because I’ve been interested in her since we did that project together, turns out the feelings were reciprocated. We’re going on our first date at 6, so I should head back to my apartment to get ready.” Vernon explains quickly as he grabs his wallet, phone, and charger. He pats your head and heads out of your room. 

“I’ll text you later tonight!” He calls, then you hear your apartment door close. You stay in the same position for awhile, wondering why the fuck your heart sank into your ass.

You and Vernon are just friends! Besties! Bffies! Of course he’s gonna go find a person to date, so are you! College is the time for exploring and possibly meeting the person you’re gonna spend the rest of your life with! It’s such a good thing that Vernon has found himself a date! You’re his best friend! You should be ecstatic over this!!

So why the FUCK are you sitting here feeling like your heart got ripped out of your ASSHOLE .

“It’s probably because I’m jealous,” You say, feeling your stomach twist at the sentence, “jealous of the fact that she might replace me and Vernon won’t need a best friend anymore. Yeah. That’s better.” it’s not better.

“Oh God, I’m gonna call Joshua. I feel like I’m gonna hurl.” You mutter, whipping your phone out of your pocket to text Joshua to come over.

✿✿✿✿✿✿

“Have you considered the thought that you might be, I don’t know, jealous?” Joshua asks from your kitchen as he whips up two eggs for the both of you. Joshua came as soon as you called, and you sat down at your kitchen island to tell him the story while he went into your kitchen to cook you some comfort food.

“Yes! That’s the conclusion I came up with-”

“Oh thank fucking God. I was wondering how long it was gonna take for one of you to realize that you both like-”

“That I’m jealous of the fact that Minji might take my place! Like, I’m pretty much one of the only girls in his life aside from his mom and his sister, so I feel threatened! Especially because Vernon has never been on a date in the duration of our friendship. That’s why I’m jealous. It makes perfect sense.” You finish, taking a large gulp of your green tea. Joshua stares at you, realizing how stupid you are. 

“Uh, you okay Shua? Your eye is like… twitching…” You point out, and he raises a hand up to his eye, letting out a small exasperated chuckle.

“I’m fine…” He responds, realizing that his two best friends are fucking idiots. I didn’t introduce the two of them to each other in freshman year of high school JUST for them to stay best friends god DAMN IT. He thinks to himself, placing the finished eggs on each of your plates.

Joshua walks over to your kitchen island, sitting down on the stool and handing you your plate. You mutter a small “Thank you, Shua.” then you both begin to eat, seemingly ignoring the subject to focus on filling your empty stomachs.

Also because Joshua thought he was gonna explode if he spent another second discussing it.

Actually no he’s gonna say ONE LAST THING.

“Do you really think you’re jealous of that? Like, do you really think-”

“Yes! It makes the most sense Shua, what else would I be jealous about-”

“Maybe because you have feelings for Vernon that you’ve been suppressing all these years due to the fear that he might not reciprocate them?” He suggests, turning to glance at your reaction.

You freeze at his words, staring down at the yolk oozing out of the egg onto your rice. You can’t help but feel like you’ve been caught, but you haven’t been caught? Because it’s not true… right? it’s true.

“That’s not true.” You mean to say this confidently, but you mutter it so quietly that even Joshua has a hard time being able to understand what you said.

“What?”

“It’s not true!” You announce, feeling more upset and sick by the minute. Joshua can’t help but feel guilty, but he knows that this conversation is important or else you’ll always hold in these feelings.

“Yn, you know that it’s true.” He says softly, and you let out a shaky breath, “I’m scared.” Joshua cocks his head to the side, confused as to why you’d be scared.

“Why?” He asks, and you bite your lip. You turn your head and give him a small smile, feeling tears flood your eyes.

“Because if I say it, then it’s true. It’ll be out there. It won’t be the secret I’ve been hiding since I was nineteen, the day he got me cotton candy at the store for no reason, simply because he knew it’s my favorite.” You answer honestly, wiping away the stray tears that fell. 

“I knew it then. That was the day I really knew my feelings weren’t just adoration and love because we were close friends. It was because I really did love him. I had a feeling that what I was feeling towards him wasn’t really… normal in friendships. That I was actually developing feelings for him, but I always just pushed it back.” You explain, avoiding eye contact with Joshua. He stays quiet beside you, and you anxiously shove two spoonfuls of egg and rice in your mouth. 

“Why don’t you tell him? If you don’t say anything now then it’ll be too late-”

“It already is too late Joshua! He’s already on a date with a girl he’s been interested in for awhile. I,” You sigh, taking in another shaky breath before continuing. “I haven’t told him or tried to initiate anything because I didn’t wanna ruin our friendship either. It’s so cheesy and like the most generic excuse someone could give for falling for their best friend, but it’s true! If he doesn’t feel the same, and I confess how I feel, then it all just gets awkward. We won’t go back to how we used to be.”

You shove the last spoonful of rice and egg in your mouth, standing up with your plate to go and wash it. Joshua watches you with sad eyes as you aggressively start soaping up your plate and silverware.

“I just,” you turn off the faucet and place your hands on the counter, gripping it to keep you in place. “The day that him and I kissed? Just for the sake of us having our first kiss? It taunts me. I didn’t even like him at that time, but the memory is like a slap in the face. It was hard to not fall in love with him, I still failed at that though, right?” 

Joshua lets out an agitated sigh, “I have to tell you something-”

“No, don’t say that he loves me too. Don’t give me false hope like that Shua, it’s too late anyways.” You tell him, turning and giving him a sad smile. 

“But it’s not! He’s literally crazy about you yn!” You open your mouth to object, only to be cut off by a knock on your door. Joshua gives you a look as if to say, were you expecting someone? To which you give him a look that means, no, I didn’t.

Joshua walks over to look through your peephole to see who’s at the door, only for his eyes to widen when he sees Vernon waiting on the other side. He turns to look at you, motioning for you to come over. You wipe your wet hands on your kitchen towel before walking over. Eyes immediately widening when you see Vernon through the peephole.

“Yn? Are you home?” He calls, and you let out a small squeak. 

“Alright, I’m coming in anyways.” He responds, taking out your spare key from his pocket. Joshua turns to look at you with wide eyes and you give him a panicked look.

“He has your keys?!” He whispers as you both run to your kitchen to act as if you didn’t hear Vernon.

“Of course he has my keys! I have your guys’ key too!” You whisper back, frantically turning on the sink. Joshua shoves the last of the rice in his mouth before walking over to your side to act as if he was helping you wash dishes.

“You have our keys?!” He whisper shouts and you swat his arm, muttering that this is not the problem at hand.

“Yn?” Vernon calls as he steps in, noticing another pair of shoes beside your door.

“In the kitchen with Joshua!” You call back and Vernon nods his head, placing the bag of store bought goods on your kitchen island.

“Yall hung out without me?” He asks with a pout, and you almost giggle out a response before Joshua beats you to it.

“You were on a date anyways Vernon, we wouldn’t want to fourth wheel.” He teases, but Vernon notices the slight edge in his tone that you’re unable to.

“By the way, how was the date?” You ask, trying to ignore the pang in your heart as soon as the question leaves your mouth. He shrugs, sitting on one of the stools in front of your kitchen island.

 “Kinda disappointing I guess? It wasn’t a proper fit, her and I.” Vernon says, and you scold yourself for feeling a twinge of hope.

“Oh, I’m sorry.” You respond, and Joshua nudges you. You turn and look at him, and he gives you a look that basically means, TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM BEFORE I DO! You glare back at him, shaking your head NO!

“So now you guys are speaking in code too? Damn, what did I miss in those two hours.” Vernon jokes. 

“If you don’t do it, I will. I’m tired of seeing you two act like you’re not hurting.” Joshua whispers and you glare at him. “You wouldn’t dare Joshua Hong-”

“Yn is in love with you Vernon.” Your mouth drops open when the sentence leaves his mouth, and so does Vernon’s mouth. 

My god he really done diddly dared.

“N-no I don’t.” You sputter, turning off the sink and wiping your hands on the kitchen towel.

“Yes she does. She’s been pushing her feelings away this whole time. Also, yn,” Joshua says, turning around to face you. 

“Vernon’s been in love with you since you both had your first kiss when it was snowing. I’ll be taking my leave now, please use protection if this newfound information takes you to that route once I leave. Love you! Update me later!” Joshua says, waving goodbye as he leaves your apartment. 

Leaving you and Vernon to just stand there, staring at each other with wide eyes and warmth rushing tp your faces. You look down at the kitchen floor, unsure of what to do now that your feelings are literally out and about, but you know that what you had feared didn’t come true.

because vernon loves you.

“I uh,” Vernon starts, coughing into his arm before continuing, “bought us cotton candy ice cream to eat? We can eat it while we talk if you want?” 

You feel your heart melt at the fact that he bought your favorite ice cream flavor in the world on his way home, so you nod your head. You grab two bowls and two spoons, placing them on the kitchen island. Vernon scoops out the pink and purple colored ice cream into each bowl. Once he’s done, you place the tub in the freezer, and you both head towards your couch. 

He sits down, and you sit down beside him. For the first few minutes, you both kinda just sit there eating your ice cream. In those few minutes, you’re both having an internal battle in your minds.

Until you break the silence and turn to him, causing him to look back at you, spoon in his mouth and all.

“I love you. I’ve loved you for years, I just didn’t accept it until now.” You state, but he’s staring at the small dribble of ice cream at the corner of your lip. He reaches out and brushes it off with his thumb, before bringing his thumb back to his mouth to suck off the ice cream. 

“D-did you hear what I just said?” You stutter, currently a panicking mess at the previous move he pulled even though he’s done it countless of times before. It’s different now.

“Yes, and I’m currently losing my marbles internally over that because I’ve been waiting for this moment for so long.” He says, giving you a small nervous smile. He places his bowl on your coffee table, taking your bowl as well and placing it beside his. Now that your hands are empty, he grasps them, giving them a small squeeze.

“I knew from the moment you closed your eyes, waiting for me to kiss you as the snow fell around us, that I was in love with you. I thought you were the most beautiful thing I’ve ever witnessed in my eighteen years of living at that time, and I still think that you are the most beautiful, precious person that I have been blessed to have in my life.” Vernon confesses, and you feel an intense rush of warmth flood to your cheeks as he stares into your eyes with the most genuine look you’ve ever seen on him.

“I love you, yn. I’ve loved you since we were eighteen. I went on that date with Minji today because I thought I could try and get over you that way, which is dumb I know, don’t need to tell me twice. I just, fuck. When we were at the restaurant, I’d look at her, right,” He makes a hand motion as if he was looking through a pair of binoculars and you let out a giggle.

“And I would wish that she was you. That’s why the date didn’t work out, because she and I didn’t fit. I can’t try and date someone else when all I wish is for them to be you.” Vernon says and you bite the inside of your cheek, feeling your heart pang against your chest. You squeeze his hands, and he lets out a small laugh.

“That being said, will you go on a date with me?” Vernon asks, and you smile, nodding your head softly.

“I’d love to.” You answer and he gives you a big smile, opening his arms and pulling you in them. You wrap your arms around his waist, hearing his loud heartbeat against his chest. He presses a kiss to the top of your head, smiling happily.

“I love you.” He whispers and you let out a small squeal, making him laugh. You raise your head up from his shoulder, looking into his deep brown eyes.

“I love you too.” You whisper back, closing your eyes and pressing a kiss to his lips. He responds right away, squeezing your hips softly. He lets a smile break loose, making you smile as well until the kiss is just teeth clashing. You pull away, laying your head in the crook of his neck once again. 

“I’ve been wanting to do that again since the first time. Jesus Christ, it’s been four years since we had our first kiss.” He mutters and you laugh, lifting your head up again so that you’re facing each other. 

“Can I kiss you again?” Vernon asks and you smile.

“You don’t have to ask if you can kiss me silly.”

“Of course I have to! I need to respect women!”

“Oh my God, your mind.”

meanwhile...

Joshua is at his apartment, playing his guitar quietly. He’s at peace knowing that all is well and his ship has finally sailed happily.

“I better be his best man for pulling that one.” Joshua mutters to himself, smiling at the prospect that you and Vernon are finally together. 

All because of ME BABY! All ME!

JOSHUA FIRST WIN!

[imonthinice]

The Criminal Psychology Majors, Jason Todd x Fem!Reader Part 9/?

Word Count: 1.7k

Author’s Note: Y/N- Your Name, A/N - Any Name (Your Best Friend’s Name)

I am sorry. lmao.

Half of my links are glitched tf out fuck this shit, touched grass yesterday but that grind don’t fuckin stop babey

Warnings: Angst - Injury, Description of said injury, Mentions of Jason’s past, Swearing, Dark Themes, no beta bitch we die like Jason Todd

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16) (Part 17) (Part 18) (Part 19) (Part 20)

Jason clutched his right side as he gasped for a long breath of the cold, rainy air surrounding him. Everything hurt and he could barely move enough to text Dick that he was down. He would hold and add pressure to the stab wound sitting directly on his waist, but he could feel the blood seeping through the gaps in his fingers as he held it. His hands were covered by the blood and he was losing it fast.

He wasn’t going to walk this off by any means, he was going to need Dick to go get him and bring him back to the hospital wing of the Batcave because he couldn’t move and he felt his eyes drooping as he waiting and tried to keep his breathing in check, while Dick was scrambling to go get him.

There would be a few questions he would have to answer to Y/N. Not even just Y/N, to Lian, his Goddaughter, who he was planning on seeing in the morning since Y/N was going to a dance competition, or at least he thought she was.

But in that moment, so many memories flew back into his head, the hopelessness as he sat there for a few seconds, bleeding out after the explosion that Joker had set off on him. And then the minutes in the Lazarus Pit as he drowned himself back to life, the water filling his lungs as he cried and screamed. But no one came.

This time, however, Dick came.

Dick swooped his baby brother up and onto his back and he tried to run to the Batmobile as fast as he could, knowing time was of the essence for saving Jason’s life. Jason had broke off from Dick for a few seconds before this moment, and it was the only thing Dick was worried about. That Dick had said to come back to him, alive.

In the car, Dick put his hands on Jason's gaping wound, trying to press his hands into it as well to slow the bleeding, the Batmobile had the ability to drive itself, and Dick thanked whatever God was watching that it did. Jason was struggling for breath at this moment, and Dick was terrified.

“You’re going to be oaky, Jase. I swear. Please. Don’t die on me, it feels like yesterday that I got you back,” he leaned into Jason’s face, “Not again, please,” Dick begged and begged as he rushed Jason to Alfred, who was waiting to operate on Jason.

--------------------------------------------

Y/N woke up as always, this time, without a text from Jason. She thought nothing of it, thinking he was safe in his house with his loving family. She went to go get coffee to kick start her day, and A/N wasn’t in the kitchen. She, still, thought nothing of it, since A/N’s lover was over the night before and she had to turn up her music to ignore the sounds coming from the other side of the house. She sent Jason a quick text,

Good morning, Jay. I hope you slept well.

And she returned to her room, coffee in hand, to write some quick little stories about  what she had placed in her journal. Not many of the ideas in there were able to be built off of, but she still tried her best with every idea she had, to see if it could be something more.

It normally never was, but it was always something she craved. The ideas of writing a book always enticed her, but she never thought she was talented enough to do so.

She heard her roommate’s door open and then the front door as A/N waved off her lover. It was a quiet Saturday morning, and Y/N loved that as she dove further and further into her work, immersing herself in the story of two lovers who were destined to meet after one moved to the hometown of the other to pursue criminal psychology.

She couldn’t get her mind off of Jason. They hadn’t even known each other for a week but she knew he was worth her time. A few hours passed by from when she sent the first text.

---------------------------------------------

Dick held Jason’s hand as he was hooked up to many different machines, he could breathe on his own, but the IV and the blood bags were hard to keep Dick’s eyes off of. If only I had been watching a little closer, he thought.

Jason fumbled in his pain-induced sleep, moaning and groaning as he did so when he opened his eyes to find a worried, sleep-deprived and very rough-looking Dick at his bedside, to which, Dick collapsed on Jason in a hug.

“Thank God,” Dick breathed.

“What... what the fuck.... what the fuck happened?” Jason stuttered, like a blanket of sleep and drugs had limited his mobility and brain function.

“I don’t know, Jase. That’s what I was hoping you’d tell me, but then again, your blood alcohol level was suspicious.”

“I... I didn’t drink... drink that much.”

“No, you didn’t. But you did drink, who was with you?”

“I don’t... know.”

“I think you were roofied so they could get the upper hand on you. You almost died, Jase.”

“Come...c’mere,” Jason managed to say, and when Dick came to him, he moved on of his hands onto Dick’s cheek, “Big... big annoying... big little annoying brother.”

“Shhhhhh, little wing,” Dick comforted his little brother, “You weren’t supposed to grow that much taller than me,” he laughed, “Dickhead,” he laughed again, then sighed, and stepped back from Jason to pace back and forth, he was stressed, “I told Roy-”

“Will.”

“Will, sorry. I told Will that you won’t be able to see Lian today, he asked what happened, he might drop by.”

“He should... shouldn’t have to... see me this... this way,” Jason said, eyes pooling with tears, “No one... should.”

“Don’t know how we’re going to explain this to your little girlfriend.”

“Oh... Man... I like... I like her.”

“I know you do, and that’s an issue when you’re high as a kite in a hospital bed, bleeding out, Jase,” Dick tried to explain, “Especially when she doesn’t know you’re Red Hood, dumbass.”

“Oh,” he said.

“I know, Jase. If it was me and Barbara didn’t know, I wouldn’t know what to do,” he sighed, “Haven’t even met this girl,” he laughed.

“It’s... it’s only been... 5 days,” he stuttered.

“and 3 back-to-back, multiple hour, spanning days, worth of dates. You don’t do that with someone you don’t think should meet your family.”

“You’re... stubborn.”

“And you’re my brother. It doesn’t take blood to exhibit the same traits.”

“The meds... are... are wearing off.”

“Do you need more?”

“Not... yet,” he struggled with his words, “Phone?”

“I mean, yeah I can give you your phone,” Dick said as he went to go unplug and hand Jason his phone, realizing that Y/N had texted Jason he said, “Guess you have someone who wants to know where you are more than Will does.”

“Will cares,” Jason said as he took the phone and read Y/N’s text,

I guess it isn’t morning anymore, huh.

Well that’s on me for texting you at 6 in the morning after I know you’ve been working late.

And I’m going to see my Goddaughter today, so I’ve been sleeping in to preserve energy for her.

Can’t forget that she’s what, 1 year old? Girl must have a lot of energy.

Her name’s Lian, and yeah. She’s a ball of energy.

He said as Lian and her dad, Will, formerly known as Roy, walked into the hospital wing of the Batcave. The secret wasn’t hidden to the little girl yet because she couldn’t remember a lot. But, she sure did recognize her Uncle Jay when she screamed her name.

Will brought his daughter up and put her beside her Uncle, and she cuddled into him, he would hold her back.

“Hey... Will.”

“You look like shit, Jaybird.”

“I feel... feel like shit.”

“You’re also talking slow, bud.”

“Drugs... do that... Will.”

“At least you’re not dead, I have no idea how I’d cope or even explain that to Lian.”

“She... she has your... eyes.”

“She’s growing into my nose too.”

“Your nose... looks like shit... on your face.”

“Okay, dickhead. You’re bedridden but yeah, attack me like you used to, I’ll just pull the plug.”

“Lian... would hate you... you for that,” he groaned as he said it.

“Do you need more drugs? I can tell Dick,” Will asked.

“Yeah... I think-”

“Don’t worry about finishing that, Jaybird. I got you.”

------------------------------------------------------

The wet ground surrounding the house Y/N lived in was a representation of what she considered, the bad things, washing away from her life as she got to know Jason more. She wished they could talk more that day, but she did not want to take away time from him and his Goddaughter. Family matters a lot to Y/N, so a thought like that just seemed selfish for her to think when she knew that little girl needed him.

She didn’t think he got injured or anything from the Office, it was a safer place than the fuckin Wayne Manor hallways. She texted Artemis,

So, you’re Wally’s girlfriend, and Wally is Dick’s best friend? Am I hearing you right?

That’s basically the intertwine we have here, yes.

So once you’re in this family, you’re IN, huh?

Nervous?

Not a chance.

The thrill of flipping off pap hasn’t left you yet?

Does everyone know about that? And yes, it’s still massively fun to do.

Wally says Dick is the only one who doesn’t think its that funny.

Lame.

C’mon now, that’s my best friend, but yeah, that’s pretty fucking lame.

You’re the fun best friend, then. You see the fun in making a fool of the pap.

You know it.

Artemis knew of what happened on patrol between Jason and his unknown attacker. Dick had told Artemis to distract Y/N from wondering why Jason seemed drunk, if he seemed drunk. The extents they went to to hide the fact that they were the vigilantes protecting the city, they didn’t know if she was going to be able to keep the secret.

Jason would talk to her after that message,

That storm last night was terrible.

I wish that we were together when it happened. I hate lightning.

Well, you were in Cali.

Did I not tell you? My competition was cancelled because the entire country is fucked with weather.

Oh. That sucks.

Do you want to spend the night here?

---------------------------------------

Do you want to spend the night here?

Jason stared at that text for a while. He did, he wanted to spend the night with her, but he was in pain, hooked to machines, with obvious wounds and bandages. He couldn’t spend the night with her.

I can’t. I’m in Metropolis with Will and Lian. Can we reschedule?

Of course we can. As long as you make sure we actually get to spend the night together.

He asked Dick in that moment, “How... how long... long til I heal?”

“Depends. You’ll be okay-ish in 5 days, but in 7-10 we have to take out your stitches if you’ve been taking care of them,” he said.

“That... that long? Damn.”

[obx-adventures]

Butterflies

Summary: From dating in junior high to high school best friends is quite a trip.

A/N: I’m having some writers block so I’m hoping this little imagine based on real life will bring the creativity back so I can get started on The Fall.

——

“What’s wrong?” Nick asks as we approach the Chateau. I look over at my boyfriend of 2 months and immediately feel guilty. His face is full of concern for me, so I summon a small smile and pretend to be excited for my birthday party tonight.

“Nothing, sweetie. I’m great.” I grab his hand as we walk up the steps of the porch.

I steel myself before I walk through the door, trying to protect my heart before I see JJ but also worrying that he won’t be here tonight. His girlfriend of 6 months, Amanda, has been keeping him away from the Pogues a lot lately, which has been particularly awful for me. Spending time with JJ is my favorite thing to do but it’s also incredibly painful. Unrequited love is a bitch.

When we walk inside, I’m met with a cacophony of laughter and music. Kie sees us first and runs over to embrace me. She picks me up, spins me around, and yells “Happy Birthday” over and over. Her drunken energy lifts my spirits, buoying me up from edge of despair. Soon after, Sarah, Pope, and John B swarm around me and I’m suffocating in the middle of a group hug.

When they finally release me, I ask the question I’ve been dreading, “No JJ?”

I can’t interpret their responses. John B looks angry, Sarah and Kie are giddy, and Pope is concerned. It’s Pope I focus on and await an answer.

“Umm, he’s in the spare room. He’s… not really in a party mood.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Amanda broke up with him.” I raise my eyebrows at Pope and then look over at Sarah and Kie, finally understanding why they look so happy.

“Ding dong, the bitch is gone!” Sarah exclaims while laughing. None of us liked JJ’s girlfriend, especially when she started isolating him from us three months ago.

Without speaking to any of them, I head toward JJ’s room. I knock softly but let myself in before I hear a reply. I find the room completely dark and see JJ curled under the blankets.

“Hey, J…” He pulls down the blankets enough for me to see his eyes. They’re rimmed in red and his cheeks are tear stained.

“Happy Birthday,” he says softly.

“Thank you. You going to come out to the party?”

“Not in the mood.”

“I know, love.” I sit on the edge of the bed and reach over to brush the hair out of his face. “But maybe being around my sunny disposition would help.”

“She fucking dumped me…” His eyes well up again but he keeps himself in check.

“Pope told me. I’m sorry.”

“I bent over backwards to make it work. And she still fucking left.”

I crawl under the blankets and wrap my arms around him. As soon as he’s in my arms, his tears break free. I hold him tightly and stroke his hair to soothe him.

“I got you, J. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Why doesn’t anyone love me enough to stick around? First my mom, then you, now her. What’s wrong with me?”

I breakdown with him at the reminder of my biggest regret. JJ and I have known each other since kindergarten. We became friends in junior high when we sat next to each other in English. Our friendship turned into flirtation and then eventually we started dating. Dating in 8th grade is full of angst and drama but through that, real feelings grew, and I panicked. Right before we started high school, I ended it. I distanced myself from all the Pogues and we didn’t speak for all of freshmen year.

“JJ, nothing is wrong with you. I ended things with us back then because I was scared.” I realize immediately that I’ve revealed too much in trying to comfort him. He lifts his head from my shoulder to look at me.

“You were scared? Of me?”

“No, of course not. I panicked… It doesn’t matter now. I just need you to know that you are amazing and if Amanda doesn’t see that, then fuck her.”

We lay together silently for a while, allowing me to think about how he and I got back to this point. I thought JJ Maybank was out of my life for good after our breakup, but fate had different plans. We ended up in the same class for sophomore English and I was shocked when he sat at the desk next to mine. We reconnected quickly and I was reminded of the purity of his soul, falling in love with him all over again. But at this point, JJ had become the ladies’ man that we all know. He hopped from girl to girl as I sat and watched as one of his best friends. For awhile I thought he had completely soured on relationships after we broke up but then he started dating Amanda. Watching him get closer and closer to her nearly broke me.

“Where’s Wonder Boy?” JJ’s voice breaks me out of the melancholy of memories and it takes me a moment to understand what he’s talking about.

“Oh shit!” I scramble out of bed and turn back to him with my arm outstretched. “C’mon, we need to get back out there. I bolted in here when Pope told me what happened, and I left him out there with everyone else.”

JJ chuckles as he pulls himself out of bed. When he stands up, I have to tear my gaze away from his toned torso before he notices. Once he pulls on a shirt, we rejoin the party.

“He’s alive!” John B yells, throwing his arms into the air in celebration. “Pope, you owe me $10.”

“You couldn’t leave him alone, Y/N?” Pope asks as he hands over the money.

“Nope, he doesn’t get to mope on my birthday.” I jump when I feel Nick’s arm wrap around my waist.

“I thought you forgot about me.” The rest of the group laughs, thinking Nick’s teasing me, but I hear the wounded tone in his voice and feel guilty all over again.

“Course not, sweetie.” I lean in and give him a peck on the lips.

Kie notices the weird vibe between us and breaks the tension by suggesting Truth or Dare. As we gather around the living room, I end up with Nick on my left and JJ directly across from me. Though he’s trying to put on a happy face, his pain is still evident, breaking my heart even more. When he catches me watching him, he offers a small smile to reassure me he’s ok. Nick reaches over and clasps my hand, causing JJ to roll his eyes. I chance a look over at Nick and his face is set in anger.

----

“Y/N, what the hell was happening last night?” I try to avoid Kie’s questioning eyes but Sarah nudges me for an answer. I had a feeling this was going to come up when Sarah invited us over for a girls’ night.

“What are you talking about?”

“JJ, you, and Nick. I thought Nick was going to kill him at one point.”

“Yea… Nick is pretty pissed at me. We got into a fight on the way home. He asked me why I brought him if I was going to ignore him all night. I tried to tell him that I was just worried about JJ, but he said it was all bullshit. He didn’t talk to me the rest of the way to my house. We sat outside for like 5 minutes without saying anything. I finally gave up and went inside. I don’t get why he was so mad.”

“Y/N, it’s just us here,” Sarah says kindly. “JJ followed you around like a lost puppy and I talked to Nick more than you did. What’s going on?”

“Really, nothing is going on.” I desperately want this conversation to end. “Stop looking at me like that.”

“Oh shit… you still love him!” Kie almost shouts. “I thought we were past this, Y/N. You’re with Nick now.”

“Kie, I’m not… I’m past it. JJ was just having a rough night and we had a weird talk when I went to check on him.”

“About what?”

I’m saved from talking about my conversation with JJ by my phone ringing. I look at it in confusion when I see that it’s John B calling.

“Hey, JB. What’s up?” Sarah and Kie are equally confused.

“Y/N, I’m sorry for calling while you’re at girls’ night but I need you to come over.”

“What’s wrong? Is JJ ok?”

“No, he’s really drunk and crying. I can’t really understand what he’s saying but he keeps asking for you.”

“I’ll be there in 10 minutes.” I hang up before he has a chance to respond and start gathering up my stuff. “Sorry, ladies. I have to go. JJ is a mess and John B needs me to come over. What? Why are you both looking at me like that?”

“Nothing, go take care of JJ. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

----

“Is Y/N here?” John B looks over at me and opens the door further so Nick can come into the Chateau.

“Hey, Nick…” I look around at the Pogues and my eyes linger on JJ before taking Nick’s hand and leading him out to the porch. “You’ve been ignoring my calls and texts for a week. What are you doing here?”

“I just wanted to let you know that I’m going on a fishing trip down in the Keys with my dad.”

“Oh, how long will you be gone?”

“Three weeks.” My eyes widen and he looks away from me.

“Wow, that’s a… that’s a long time.”

“Yea, I just wanted you to know I’d be gone.” He still won’t make eye contact with me and is shuffling his feet. I step towards him and grab his hands to get his attention. After a few moments, he finally meets my eyes.

“So what does that mean for us? We haven’t talked since my party last week and now you’re leaving. Are you still mad at me?”

“I’m not mad, Y/N.” He drops my hands and takes a step back while running his hands through his hair. “I’m… fuck, I don’t know. What the hell is going on with you and JJ?”

“Nothing! God, I’m so fucking sick of people asking me that! JJ’s having a hard time and he’s one of my best friends so I’m here for him. Is that so fucking horrible?”

“Helping your friend through a rough patch is fine but why the hell do you think people keep asking you about him?!” He takes a breath and looks away from me for a moment. “Are you in love with him?”

“Nick, come on. You’re reading too much into this.”

“Are you in love with him?!” He yells, causing me to jump. I move closer to him and place both hands on his shoulders.

“I’m with you, Nick. You need to let this go.” He meets my eyes finally and looks like he’s trying to find an answer.

“Fuck this.” His face sets in anger as he steps back and turns to leave. “I’ll be back in a couple weeks.”

“Nick, wait!” He stops at the bottom of the steps and turns back to me. “Where does this leave us?”

“We’ll talk when I get back.” He leaves without another glace back at me.

I sit down on the couch on the porch with my head in my hands. I feel terrible for the pain I’m causing him. Why can’t I just let JJ go and commit myself fully to Nick? Nick is a great guy and he was patient with me when we first started spending time together. He could tell I was trying to heal but he never asked me what caused my pain. Maybe if he had, we could have avoided all of this trouble. Maybe I would have told him about my feelings for JJ and I wouldn’t have let him sweep me away into the hope that caring about him would make me care less about one of my best friends.

“You ok?” I lift my head to look at JJ and wipe away my tears. He sits down next to me on the couch and pulls me into his side. “What happened?”

“Nick… um, he’s going out of town with his dad for a few weeks.”

“And that’s why you’re crying?”

“No… he’s still angry. I don’t know where we stand right now.”

“Why’s he angry?���

“He thinks… nevermind, don’t worry about it.”

“Nope, you’ve been taking care of me all week. Talk to me, love.”

I steady myself and meet his gaze. We started calling each other pet names back in junior high as a joke since everyone assumed (correctly) that we liked each other. Then we picked it right back up as we became friends again. ‘Love’ is the one that stuck, and it never went away when he was with Amanda and I started dating Nick, we just only say it when it’s just the two of us.

“Let’s go back inside.” I stand up before he can respond but he grabs my hand to stop me. “JJ, I can’t get into this right now. Ask me another time, ok?”

When we head back inside, everyone’s questioning eyes are on me. Instead of talking, I get myself a beer and chug it down. The Pogues pick up on my avoidance and resume their conversation. I can feel JJ watching me but continue to avoid his gaze, unwilling to show him the storm of emotions that I’m trying to suppress.

----

I’m awaken in the middle of the night by a noise I can’t place. It takes me a moment to understand that it was a knock on my window. I groggily climb out of bed and shuffle over to open the window, not bothering to open my eyes all the way to see who my visitor is. Since Nick left 2 weeks ago, JJ has come by almost every night when he can’t sleep.

“I told you to just come in.” I mumble at him.

“Felt like a creep comin’ in while you were asleep.”

“Don’t care, I’d still be dreaming.”

“What were you dreaming about?” He lays down next to me and brushes the hair out of my face. “Love, don’t go back to sleep.”

“It’s ‪2am‬, J.” He laughs a little at how grumpy I sound.

“I know but I want to talk to you.”

“About what?”

“I don’t care, whatever you want.”

“I want to sleep.” I grope my hand over to find his face and cover his mouth. I feel his smile before he pulls my hand away.

“Please… tell me a story.” Usually when he comes over, I let him in and we quickly fall asleep next to each other. Something must be bothering him.

“JJ, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I just want to talk to you.”

“Why?”

“Because I like the sound of your voice.” One eye quirks open at this and I furrow my brow at him.

“J, what’s going on? You normally aren’t this chatty.”

“I have to tell you something.”

“Ok… what is it?” I push myself up onto my elbow so I can see his face.

“I don’t want to say it yet. I was hoping you talking would settle my nerves first.”

“Don’t be nervous. Just say what you need to say.”

When he’s quiet, I lay back down and try to relax. Just as I’m about to fall back asleep, he opens his mouth.

“You give me butterflies…”

“I what?!”

“Whenever I’m around you, hell even when I’m just thinking about you, I get butterflies in my stomach. Which is really fucking weird because I’m always thinking about you. So… butterflies all the time.”

I’m stunned into silence. He rolls over so our faces are inches away and tentatively cups my cheek in his hand, rubbing soft circles with his thumb. I close my eyes at his touch and feel my heart start to race. I give JJ butterflies. Me. And he said he’s always thinking about me. When the hell did that start?

“Since when?”

“Since always.”

“Always?” I ask, confusion lacing my voice. “Like since we became friends again?”

“No, since we became friends the first time. Since 7th grade. I thought it went away when we didn’t talk for all of freshman year but then I walk into sophomore English and I thought I was going to pass out when I saw you. It’s never gotten better, even when I was with Amanda, which was the whole reason she stopped hanging out with the Pogues.”

“Huh?” Now I sit up, hoping to finally understand why Amanda kept JJ away from us all that time.

“The last time she did, we all went to the beach. You and I got into a splash fight in the water while she was sitting in the sand. You dunked me and I lifted you up and threw you. When I got out, she said she wanted to go and then she spent the whole car ride back to her place yelling at me about flirting with you in front of her. So, she didn’t come around anymore. But then she heard about that Boneyard party a couple of months ago when you fell asleep leaning against me around the fire and I carried you back to the Chateau. She didn’t want me to see you anymore.”

“That’s why you were never around?”

“I thought that it was for the best for us to be apart for a while, maybe the damn butterflies would go away. But it didn’t do any good. There were a few times when we saw you out on a date with Nick and it felt like I was sucker punched in the stomach. When she broke up with me, I thought it was because of you.”

“Was it?”

“No, she said she found someone else. That’s why I was so upset, I don’t… I don’t do very well with being left. But you’ve been with me these past couple weeks… and once I got past the rejection, I remembered she was never the person I wanted anyway.”

I turn away from him and sit on the edge of the bed, thinking furiously. Everything he said makes sense, but none of this feels real.

“Can I ask you something?” I turn back to him and nod, not trusting my voice. “Why has Nick been such a dick since your birthday?”

“He thinks I’m in love with you.”

“Are you?”

All I can do is nod again. When he moves forward to kiss me, I put up my hand to stop him. “I’m still technically in a relationship with Nick, love.”

“I know but –”

“No buts. How could I ask you to trust me if I cheat on him with you?” He growls in response but lays back down.

“When does he come back?” I lay back down too but we both keep to our side of the bed.

“A week, I think.”

“We’ve waited this long, I guess another week won’t kill me.”

——

“You have got to be kidding me?!”

I jolt awake the following morning at the loud voice and am shocked to see Nick standing at the foot of my bed. He’s staring in the area to my left and I suddenly remember JJ is in my bed.

“Nick, it’s not what it looks it!”

“Really? So I’m imagining JJ in bed with you?”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it. Nothing happened between me and JJ.”

“Oh sure, that’s totally believable.” He throws his hands up and leaves my room.

I turn to JJ who is smirking at me. I roll my eyes at him and get up to follow after Nick.

“Where are you going?”

“To talk to Nick, to explain.”

“Why does it matter? You were going to break up with him anyways and I don’t think he’s going to believe you.”

“It matters to me. Even if he doesn’t believe me, I need him to know the truth.”

I run out of my room and catch Nick as he’s getting in his car.

“Nick, please let me explain!” I catch him as he’s opening his car door.

“Did you have sex with him?” His anger and pain are written all over his face.

“No! We didn’t even kiss.” When he scoffs, I add, “I promise.”

“Your word doesn’t mean a lot here. You also told me nothing was going with you two.”

“Nick, I’m sorry. Really, I am. I was in denial... You know how I was a bit of a mess when we started hanging out? Well, that was because I was in love with JJ and he was with Amanda. But I swear, I thought I had gotten past it when we actually started dating. Being your friend, spending time with you, helped. And I thought the feelings for him were gone when I realized I had a crush on you.”

“When did you figure out that you’re still in love with him?” I chew on my bottom lip and look at my feet. “When, Y/N?”

“When we ran into him and Amanda at the Wreck, maybe a month after we started dating.”

“That was 2 months ago! You could have saved us all a lot of fucking pain if you just ended it then.”

“I... I’m sorry, Nick.” My voice drops to a whisper as I add, “I thought it would get better if I gave it time.”

“What about me?! While you were trying to get over him, I was falling in love with you! I spent the past two weeks moping instead of fishing, which is why my dad brought us home a week early. He told me I was being a jackass and to come straight here to apologize. He said it would be romantic to just show up, to surprise you. I guess it’s a good thing I didn’t call, who knows how much longer this charade would have gone on. Were you ever going to tell me?”

“I was planning to tell you everything when you got back...”

“Great... well, consider us over. You two deserve each other.”

After I watch him drive away, I walk back inside and find JJ waiting right inside the door. He wraps his arms tightly around me and kisses my temple.

“I am such a shitty person...” I start crying into his shoulder while he strokes my hair.

“No, love, not at all. This was a fucked up situation for all of us.”

“I hurt him so badly.”

“He’ll be ok.” When I scoff at him, he adds, “Eventually.”

We stand there in each other’s arms for a little bit until he pulls back to tell me he needs to go to work.

“Can I come back later?” I nod at him and he kisses my forehead before he leaves.

——

It’s been two weeks since Nick and I broke up and JJ and I have spent almost every moment together. But nothing has happened between us yet. No kissing, no more talks about butterflies, nothing. At first I thought JJ was just trying to give me space after how awful things went with Nick but now I don’t know.

“JJ, what are we doing?” I finally ask him. Instead of watching the movie, I’ve spent most of it staring at him laying on his side of the bed, trying to find the courage to ask him what’s been bothering me.

“Umm, watching this shitty movie that you picked.” He turns towards me and sees the tears building in my eyes. “Love, what’s wrong?”

“I thought... what happened... did the butterflies go away?”

“Fuck, no, of course not.” He brushes away the tears that slipped down my cheeks. “I didn’t know if... you were so upset after you talked to Nick... I didn’t know if something changed or if you thought you picked the wrong guy or, shit, even if you were forced into your choice because he found me in your bed.”

“JJ, you’ve always been my first choice. I got scared when we were kids because I realized that I will always want you. I just never thought I could keep you. Even at 14, I knew you are the man of my dreams. But I’m just me. I thought if I said goodbye first, I might be ok. But I’ve regretted it every day since. I’m so in love with you, JJ. I always have. I think I always will.”

We stare into each other’s eyes for almost an hour as we lean against my head board. In those ocean blue eyes, I see his internal struggle. I give him time to process everything I’ve said, knowing that it’s contrary to everything he’s been told his whole life.

“You aren’t just you, love.” He leans closer to me, our noses are centimeters apart. “You’re the most important person in my life. I love you.”

He closes the remaining distance and kisses me gently. I press closer and he deepens the kiss, resting his hand softly on my cheek. He pulls back and gives me my favorite JJ smile.

“The butterflies definitely didn’t go away, love.” I smile back at him and go back in for another kiss.

[rhapshie]

This was from a writing challenge I had in my discord server a while back. Never really shared it outside, so I thought I’ll throw it here. I don’t think I’ll ever post it on my AO3

Title: - Rating: M Pairing: Aomine/Kagami TW: Suicide. The other dies in the end too but due to an unrelated incidence.

17 January.

Am I okay? I feel like I'm falling back down. I never knew how much I like his presence until he's not there anymore.

.

Kagami was pretty sure he was in love.

But no one should take his word for it. After all, he didn't know the first thing about romance, so this could just be a stupid infatuation for all he knew, but he really couldn't help it. Aomine was... unreal. He was convinced that the Touou player wasn't human because how could someone be so dazzling? It didn't even matter that he had such a cocky attitude. If anything, it made everything that much better.

Because what was wrong with confidence when he had the skill to back it up? Besides, Kagami found that kind of sexy.

In fear of his own emotion, he hid.

Over the course of his second year, he slowly grew more and more distant from Aomine after convincing himself that this was for the best. It would be much easier on his heart if he never confessed, therefore he'd never get rejected.

That didn't stop him from pining from afar, though.

.

21 March.

Satsuki suspects that something's up but I really don't wanna worry her more than I already do.

.

It all happened too quickly and too suddenly.

Kagami was eighteen years old, attending the last year of high school in Seirin when he felt something was amiss. Initially, he ignored it, thinking that the sudden throbbing in his heart was just his imagination and he continued playing basketball. Interhigh was just around the corner and their first opponent was Touou, so he couldn't afford to get distracted.

However, the nausea persisted throughout the night. Kagami tossed and turned in his bed as he wondered what could possibly cause such agitation. Cold sweat ran along his back as he forced himself to get some shut-eye only to finally succeed at too-late o'clock.

Something was seriously not right, but he couldn't pinpoint what exactly.

.

1 April

I hate this. I don't know what the point is anymore. There's only so much that basketball can numb and I'm fucking hurting all over. I don't know how to reconnect with Tetsu and the others and I damn well don't wanna go to Kagami. Where is he anyway? Haven't seen him around lately...

.

Aomine wasn't there for their match.

And he wasn't the only one absent either. The spot next to Harasawa where Momoi usually sat was empty and the entirety of Touou seemed extremely distracted. Their focus was at an all-time low and they looked uncharacteristically distracted. Was it simply because of their missing ace? Kagami had a feeling that it was something else entirely. Judging from Kuroko's body language that conveyed discomfort, the redhead grew more certain that something else was gnawing on them.

No one wanted to tell him where Aomine was. They all simply turned their heads the other way and walked away, frustrating Kagami to no end. While he knew that they didn't look like the best buddies, he respected the other power forward. Kagami would go as far as to admit that he had a massive crush on Aomine.

Of course, it wasn't something he'd say out loud. In fact, instead of acting on it, he chose to stay as far away as possible. He figured that if he never showed any affection, he wouldn't have to get rejected. Better safe than sorry. Aomine looked like he was far from gay, so Kagami wanted to spare himself the heartache.

He knew he had no right to pry, but he felt like he deserved to know why Aomine didn't come.

.

13 May

All I do is hurt everyone near me even when they're just trying to help. Maybe it's better if I don't ask for help... It'll just be a pain in the ass. At the end of the day, it's my problem. I got no rights dragging other people into it, especially after what I've done. I'm so fucking tired. I'm so sick of feeling like this. If it wasn't for basketball, I... maybe I'd be long dead or something. Guess I'll have no choice but to keep playing.

.

Gone.

He was gone.

There was a deafening ringing in Kagami's ears when Momoi broke the news that Aomine had passed away. He had overdosed on paracetamol the night before the match. His parents were away on a business trip, so he wasn't found until Momoi broke into her childhood friend's place and saw Aomine's unconscious body in the kitchen. His skin was pale, deathly blue and icy cold.

Kagami didn't know what to say or how to react, so he only stood there.

He didn't cry. He couldn't.

.

11 June

I can't sleep. My head hurts. It's so pathetic but I feel so lonely... I still haven't told anyone, but I think I really should see a psychologist.

.

In the coffin lied Aomine's dead body. His silky blue hair was neatly brushed and there was no crease on his forehead. It was an unfamiliar sight for Kagami who could only stare at the man who would never again look at him with his electric navy eyes. Kagami would never again face him in a heated battle, would never again scream or be screamed at. There would be none of that infuriating lopsided smirk, that mocking laughter or the obsolete 'the only one who can beat me is me'.

He should be happy to finally be rid of Aomine's cocky attitude, but he wasn't.

Because it meant he would never see Aomine in his raw form, glistening in sweat and the joy of a child as he played the sport he loved ever again, nor one of his rare sincere smiles. There would be none of that husky voice haunting him at night when he only had his right hand as a company. Soon, the seat that Aomine occupied in Maji burger when they had dinner with the rest of the Generation of Miracles would be empty.

Kagami once again stared at the man who'd never again open his eyes. He looked so peaceful in death, unlike how he usually carried himself when he was alive and breathing.

And that was what hurt Kagami the most.

.

19 June

I can't do this anymore. No matter where I look, I don't see anyone who can help me. Besides, it's embarrassing to talk to them about this... shit. And I don't have money for psychologists either. Why are they so expensive? I sure as hell can't ask mum and dad because they'll end up grilling me about it.

.

In the months following Aomine's death—suicide, Kagami felt empty.

They found a journal under the man's pillow that detailed his slow spiral into depression. While he had his good days and things looked promising a couple of years ago when he finally regained the love of basketball that he thought he had lost forever, it didn't last.

He thought about all the missed opportunities that metastasised into regrets. There were multiple occasions when he was able to lend a helping hand, but all he ever did was chicken out. He was too scared of his own feelings for Aomine that he ended up running away.

Kagami wondered if he had talked more to him, he'd still be here right now. Maybe he was part of the reason why Aomine killed himself.

.

1 July

I'm getting really worried... The voices in my head won't stop. Earlier I had to call Satsuki just so I can talk to someone. I don't wanna worry her... I really don't. But between her and my parents... I guess I don't have a choice.

.

They said time healed all wounds, but Kagami started to suspect that maybe some wounds were simply too deep to ever disappear.

It had been too many years since Aomine's untimely death and he could barely remember the guy's face or voice anymore, but it never hurt any less when he remembered the arrogant Touou ace.

"Papa!"

Kagami looked away from the newspaper on his hand when he heard his little girl running towards him with glee. Her fingers were stubby and she was still unbalanced on her feet. The sight never ceased to warm his heart.

Despite living with his beautiful wife that he didn't deserve, Kagami never really truly let go of his past. He'd done well concealing it, but he knew that his wife suspected that something was up.

There were lingering what-if's spinning in his head. If he had asked Aomine for a one-on-one that evening, maybe none of this would ever happen. Maybe right now, they'd be living together with a child of their own. Or maybe they'd still be friends, rivals, whatever. 

Maybe if they celebrated their birthdays together, maybe if Kagami gave him that box of homemade chocolate hiding in his fridge for valentine's, maybe if they spent one more day together in Maji's, maybe Aomine would still be alive right now. Even if they ended up drifting apart or hated each other's guts, it would be much better than this.

It was stupid to wallow in regret, he knew.

However, the diary that Momoi insisted he kept burned a hole in the nightstand. It was a grim reminder of his failure; of his cowardice that cost him the one person he wanted to see smile.

.

6 August

What would he say if he were here?

Where did he go, seriously... it's been so long since we've last met or talked.

I guess it's the interhigh soon. Maybe I'll see him again then.

.

He didn't even know when he started to grow such intense feelings for Aomine. For years he searched, but could never really pinpoint the exact time.

"Kagami-kun, it's time to go." Kuroko gently put a hand on the door and glanced at his old friend with a pair of sympathetic eyes that turned even more mellow when he saw the worn diary on Kagami's lap. "Don't you think you've carried this weight enough?"

The redhead stared at the wrinkly paper before he put it neatly in his suitcase on top of his clothes. "I'll carry it to my grave."

"It wasn't your fault." Said the lithe male with a monotone voice, but full of sadness for those who knew him.

Maybe if Kuroko actually read through the diary, he'd change his mind, Kagami thought.

.

12 August

I really wanna tell him how much I like talking to him.

This is so stupid.

I texted him but he never replied. It's been 3 weeks.

Maybe he hates me now.

.

He knew that one of these days, he'd get himself in a pickle he'd never get out of. Today so happened to be one of those days.

Regardless of what would happen, he was happy that he had divorced his wife and she had the custody of their daughter. As for his friends... well, they'd live. Everyone knew what being a firefighter would entail. Lots of rescuing cats from the tree, fetching lost keys from the gutters, running into a burning building and in some cases...

Death.

Yeah, that was a thing too.

With a forced laughter, Kagami curled his head under his chest to avoid inhaling more smoke than he already did. However, all openings were sealed and he had nowhere else to go.

He really should've chosen another path. NBA, for one. By now, he'd probably be past his prime. 35 years old. He'd be retired with a lot of money. Definitely more than he would ever get by working as a firefighter.

As the fire licked the space around him and burnt wood toppling down from the ceiling, Kagami waited for the moment when one would crush him and put him out of his misery. Or maybe his friends would come in and drag him out.

"...gami..."

The redhead lied on his stomach, eyes glassy as he watched the building structure crashed down all around him.

"Oi, Bakagami! How long are you gonna sulk for?"

"I'm not sulking..." He mumbled under his breath. "...Ahomine."

Ah, yeah. That was what he sounded like. Low, husky and seductive voice that he couldn't get enough of.

"C'mon, let's play." Those lips upturned into a grin and even though the rest of his face was obscured by the light, Kagami could clearly see beautiful deep blue eyes and frown lines on his forehead. "You were the one who bugged me, so just get up already."

"You're not an early riser, idiot. Why are you so—" he coughed after a particularly nasty inhale," so eager..."

"Hurry or I guess we won't play. I'll give you five minutes."

"Five minutes? I'll whoop your ass in three." He snorted inbetween his coughing fit.

"After all that talk you're just gonna lie there? I know you only had like, 3 hours sleep, but I thought you've been looking forward to this."

He felt his eyes slowly closing.

"Daiki..." He heaved tiredly. A piece of wood fell on his thigh and he bit out a scream when it charred his protective gear. Even through it, he felt the deathly heat. "I—Argh!" He didn't even know what the fuck that was but he was pretty sure it crushed his left leg. "I'm sorry. I'll be there soon."

"Fine," The light slowly eased as Aomine's head blocked the source of light to create a halo. Tanned skin, boyish grin and eyes that were positively brimming with life. "I'll wait for you."

.

15 August

If there's a life after death.

I wonder if they play basketball?

If they do, maybe I'll get to play with him again one day.

[drawlfoy]

The Wonders of Ohio P.5

masterlist (check here for parts 1-4!) request guidelines

pairing: draco x reader

request: from 14 year old me babey

warnings: cringe, mentions of drug use, mentions of sex, language, and just bad writing

summary: y/n is in her senior year of high school when she is asked to take on an exchange student from britain that’s a little...different. this is NOT a nonmagic AU. draco is still a wizard and this will become and integral part of the story shortly.

a/n: heyyyy everyone. i graduated from high school this week and i’m posting this as my happy-one-year-to-me. as some of you may know, i posted my very first fic on this day a year ago. i’m really happy to see how i’ve grown since and i’m so lucky to have shared this with all of you. anyways, nittygritty--

this part is really the last slow exposition chapter. chapters 6 on will be a whole whirlwind beginning with homecoming and i hope that you guys are willing to stick around. i promise itll be worth the wait. y/n is going to get the story arc of a lifetime and also please do not hate heather she is just going through it ok 

anywayssssssss

tags tags tags  @gruffle1 @missmulti @cleopatera @hahaboop @accio-rogers @geeksareunique @eltanin-malfoy @war-sword @cams-lynn @itsivyberry @ayo-cowbelly @nerd-domland @erisdogwood @loveissupernatural

word count: 4.6k (;))

song recs: 

strawberry blonde -- mitski 

in your neighbors garden -- mimi bay

wishes -- beach house

ode to artifice -- samia 

pink in the night -- mitski

enjoy <3

The seatbelt buckle scorched the side of Y/N’s exposed neck as she turned to face the disheveled blonde in the passenger seat.

“Do I need to teach you to set an alarm?” 

Draco let out a huff. “Stop. Do you have a….a comb, or a brush, or something here?” His hands looked abnormally fidgety. Their actions were shaky, varying from patting his pockets to running through his hair. He seemed more and more frustrated each time his hands left his pockets empty. 

How curious Y/N thought as she racked her brain for any remembrance of putting a brush in her car. It was always a mess, and she honestly couldn’t blame Draco for assuming that anything could be in there.

“I don’t think there’s one here,” said Y/N, trying to sound at least a little sympathetic despite the fact that his tardiness had them 10 minutes late. “You can look around if you want, king.”

“What’d you call me?” His voice was suddenly sharp and awake.

Y/N rolled her eyes so hard that she thought they’d get stuck in the back of her head. “You don’t--ok. It’s a joke. You can call guys here that.”

“And it means that I’m…?”

“It means I’m acknowledging that you exist, I guess. It’s not like it has a strict negative or positive connotation. Like, I can say ‘Ok king’ to any man telling me something and it can either be sarcastic, or it can be because I don’t know what else to say and just want to let him know I heard him.”

Draco’s eyes looked a tad glazed over when Y/N dared a glance in his direction.

“I know it’s confusing. I’m sorry. I’ll try and ease you into the world of American slang.” 

He granted her a little “uh-huh” before opening up the glovebox with great difficulty and rummaging through the mess. Y/N would’ve felt more embarrassed about the tampon that fell on the ground in the process if he seemed like he actually knew what it was. 

Her attention turned back to the road as Draco continued to sift through things. Y/N couldn’t help but wonder if there was anything embarrassing hidden away in the corners of her car--after all, it hadn’t been organized since the beginning of summer--and decided that it was better to pretend it wasn’t happening.

It wasn’t the eerie silence that eventually prompted her to turn to look his direction--no, it was the weird energy in the car, like the feeling right before a thunderstorm. All the hair raised on her arms, and she shivered...but it was stifling hot in the car.

“Oh, did you find a brush?” she asked. His hair laid as perfectly as always, but his hands were lying shaking in his lap, palms to the sky. No hairbrush was in sight.

“Er... “ He was paler than usual, which was quite the feat for someone who looked like a ream of paper. “No. Just remembered a trick my father taught me.”

She tensed at the mention of his father--the very first time Draco had done so. “Oh. Okay. Glad you got it figured out, king.”

Her voice lightened on the last word, hoping she could coax a little smile out of him. 

“Don’t call me that.”

“Ok.”

oOo

 There were many things Y/N thought she understood, but Draco Malfoy being in her Physics C class was not one of them. She took pity and sat next to him as he fumbled his way through the first lecture. His notes, while neat, were littered with crossed out portions and question marks. 

You do know there’s an eraser on your pencil, right? she jotted on a note that she sent his way. His brow furrowed and he seemed to tap at the end of the eraser for just a few moments before deciding otherwise and xing out another practice problem he’d done incorrectly. Symbols that she’d never seen before were scattered all throughout his notes. 

Maybe the UK kids just learn stuff differently.

By the time that Physics came to an end, Y/N was eager to get away from the storm cloud that was brewing over Draco’s perfectly smoothed and infuriatingly pretty moonbeam colored hair. The amount of attention he was getting from all the other girls made Y/N want to jump off a cliff--suddenly everyone was her “best friend” “just wanting to check up on what happened over summer”. She was grateful to see the face of Lizzy, grinning and looking mischievous during their break period.

“You must be Draco,” said the redhead, a glint in her eyes. He looked a little scared.

“Er...yeah.”

“Mind giving us some privacy? Y/N and I have some urgent matters to discuss,” she continued, looking him up and down. Y/N attempted to ignore the twist in her gut as she watched him swallow and nod, turning away to go brood elsewhere. Once he was out of sight, Lizzy grabbed her arm and yanked her into the girl’s bathroom.

“It’s so funny how he’s following you around like a lost puppy,” Lizzy said. “Also, he’s gorgeous. If you don’t at least try to get some of that, then I’m never trusting your judgement again.”

“But, Li-”

“The boy’s a fucking walking Wattpad story cover. Dark, tragic past, unbelievably sharp jawline, rich parents, exotic accent....honestly, Y/N, I don’t know what else you could want.” 

“Mom literally called him my host brother,” said Y/N. The bathroom was starting to smell suspiciously like cotton candy. “That’s wrong. On so many levels.” 

“But you’re not related!”

“But it’s gross! And predatory! The kid doesn’t even know how to do basic algebra! I’m all he has!” 

Lizzy’s eyebrow found its new home in the middle of her forehead. “You’ve gone absolutely batty if you think that every girl cursed with attraction to men in Cincinnati wouldn’t jump his skin at the chance. Use your head, queenie. He’s not alone. Shoot your shot.”

Y/N opened her mouth to serve back a retort--that was definitely there, thank you very much--but decided against it once she realized that the bathroom had become dead silent. “Um...maybe we can go over this later.” She flickered her eyes over to the line behind them that was now intently hanging on their every word. “I forgot I had to talk to the counselor.”

Lizzy was smirking as they exited the bathroom and began the search for Draco. It didn’t take long--the circle comprised of Heather and her friends was more than enough of a giveaway that he was about. 

“Draco, sorry to make you wait,” Y/N called out. It took all her effort to abstain from cringing as her voice rang out across the group. Heather turned to send her a big smile.

“Hey Y/N! You didn’t tell me that Draco was from London!” 

“He’s not,” she responded. “He’s from Wiltshire.” 

“Wiltshire. Of course. That’s what I meant.”

Draco’s smile was tense as he looked down at Heather--who stood roughly 4 inches below him--but he was smiling, and that wasn’t something that Y/N was on the receiving end of frequently. She didn’t know whether to be offended or relieved.

“I’m sure. Break’s almost over, Draco. I can show you where the English department is before the time is up.” 

 He paused, looking down at the blonde grinning up at him. “Er, actually, Heather already offered to show me around for the rest of the day.”

“Yeah, for sure. I’ll see you in French.”

Y/N was shocked at the sheer amount of jealousy that rose up in her throat as she turned away and made her way to Art History---the only class Y/N and Draco didn’t share. The walk was strange. Being in solitude after having a gloomy British boy attached to her hip was understandably eerie. Because that’s all it was. Adjustment. Nothing else.

She settled in at a table full of her friends, namely Sylvia. The tall girl was always a bit whimsical, but Y/N found that she was a breath of fresh air compared to everyone else. It made sense that Sylvia would take Art History--her dark academic inspired aura and the perpetually hot mug of black coffee just screamed history nut. 

“How’s your new brother?” she asked after the teacher had taken attendance. “I say that because I haven’t heard his name yet.”

“Ick, it’s gross to think of him as my brother,” Y/N responded. “And I know! We need to catch up. I’m sorry about not talking to you for a bit. The time difference was a bit weird during your trip.”

“It’s ok, I get it. I was away on family business, anyways. I didn’t expect you to spend your days staying up until the wee hours of the night to tell me all about your exchange student. Anyways. His name?”

“You’re gonna scream when you hear it, Vie,” she said. “Draco Malfoy. It’s so posh. You have no idea. It definitely suits him, though. He’s very...You good?” 

Sylvia’s olive toned face looked a bit paler than usual. “Yeah. Yeah, I just remembered that I forgot to take the trash out this morning. I’ll have to text my mom about it.” She adjusted the wool cardigan that hung around her shoulders and came up looking composed. “Draco, huh? His parents must hate him.”

“At the very least! He’s so rude. And uptight. I can’t tell if it’s just a Brit thing or if it’s because he’s an asshole.” 

Sylvia laughed. “I mean, when I was there over the summer, it was a different culture for sure. We’re by far louder. But I didn’t meet many mean ones. You must’ve just got a bad apple, then.”

“I guess so. He is pret--”

“Ladies, is there something you’d like to share with the rest of the class?”

“No, Mrs. Jensen,” Sylvia and Y/N said in unison. 

oOo

“Thoughts, king?” 

“I told you not to call me that.” Draco glared at her as he tried to open the passenger side door to find that it was locked tight. “Unlock? Please?”

“And I told you not to get cozy with ASB kids, yet here we are,” said Y/N as she slotted the key into the lock and turned. 

“What’s it to you?”

“Nothing. I’m just looking out for you.” She slammed the door shut and threw her bag in the bag. The line of traffic to get out of the school was long and stuffy, and she was eager to just get it over with.

The wait was so hot that Draco peeled off his stupid formalish jacket that was on thin ice of being called a blazer and probably worth more than her car. Y/N tried to look away as his hair became slightly ruffled, but she couldn’t pry her eyes away. It was endearing, almost, how someone who could look so posh and serious could have ruffly hair--and hair that naturally light, too. She had asked him one night if it was dyed, and he scowled at her and told her the grammatically correct term was dead, and that his hair was alive, just like the rest of him, thank you very much. She dropped it. 

Y/N finally rolled down her window after the AC simply refused to satisfy her, and the wind was a nice reminder to keep in her own lane. Draco was beautiful. There was no other way to put it. He had a feel of power to him, like he was capable of anything but just held it back. But he was just as inaccessible as he was pretty, and there was nothing she could do about that.

“Y/N?” He asked after a few moments of sitting in silence. “What’s Homecoming?” 

“Who told you about that?” 

“Heather. She asked if I had a date. Is that like a ball here?”

“She asked you if you had a date on the first day?”

“Yeah.”

“Fuck. ASB kids never do sleep, huh.” 

“What?”

“Homecoming isn’t a ball. It’s like a...an…” Y/N paused as she saw Draco raise his eyebrows. “It’s, like, uh….Well I guess it is like a ball. An American one, though. Way less extravagant. It’s an excuse to get dressed up and run around the city. There technically is a dance, and all the ASB kids have to go, but literally no one else does but the underclassmen. Normally I go out with my friends and a date to somewhere fun and take pictures. And then get trashed afterwards.”

“Classy,” said Draco. “I think you can go now.”

A honk behind her emphasized his point as the space in between her and the car in front widened substantially. 

“Thanks. Anyways, it’s not really a big deal. I’d suggest not going with Heather so you can skip out on the dance portion. Or if you want to go with her, get her to come with us into Cincinnati because I am not going to spend my last homecoming watching a grind circle.” 

“A...what circle? And I don’t want to go with her.”

The relief Y/N felt was embarrassing. “Um...better if you don’t worry about it. You have a long time to figure it out anyways.”

He seemed satisfied with that answer, propping his elbow up on the center console. The pristine button up he was wearing had ridden up, exposing the pale skin and the bottom of the tattoo she had seen a hint of earlier. “Do you have a date?”

“Um. No, not yet. I don’t think anyone except for couples do yet. We have until the end of this month to figure it out, so I’m not too worried about it.”

He nodded as Y/N’s car finally left the school parking lot and began picking up speed. 

“I’m assuming you had balls? At your posh boarding school?” 

“Er…” Draco ran his hand through his hair, ruffling it further. “We only had one. It was when I was 14. We called it the Yule Ball.”

“Why only one?”

“It was for a special occasion. We had two other schools join us as well. It was quite a good time.”

“So every student only has one ball in their lifetime?”

“Of course not. Some of us--the ones from old families--have events like that regularly.”

“I’m sorry if this is overstepping my bounds,” began Y/N, noticing how he tensed up, “So you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. But, I’m just wondering, what is your family like?”

“What do you mean?”

“Like are they nice?”

“Oh.” The line in his forehead relaxed. “No. They wouldn’t like you.”

“Glad to hear it,” she said. “Do you like them?”

She heard the breath hitch in his throat. “I don’t know anymore.”

“I’m sure it’s hard to think about it when you feel like they’ve just shipped you off without anyone,” she added. “I’m really sorry, Draco. I know I’ve been a bit mean to you. I know that I’ll never be able to understand what you’re going through right now.”

The slight smile that spread across his face would’ve knocked her to her knees if she wasn’t already sitting down. “It’s okay. I wouldn’t expect you to understand.”

The silence that awaited them for the rest of the journey was comfortable.

oOo

School began to pick up the pace after the first few days. Y/N got into the swing of homework and her extracurricular workload. Draco was having a bit more difficulty, she presumed, but he’d never admit to it. She took pity one evening and gave him her laptop opened to a Khan Academy tab for Physics and was pleased to see that he showed up to class the next day with completed homework. He asked to borrow her laptop on a much more frequent basis after that. 

The routine they settled into had her heart leaping into her chest almost constantly--they’d eat breakfast together at the table, Y/N would try to ignore how pretty he looked across the table as they shared a pot of black tea (earl grey, which Y/N was thrilled to learn was his favorite as well), they’d get in the car, she’d write him notes in physics to help him (even though he never asked, he always smile and give a little shake of his head before unfolding them and intently staring at her writing), they’d drive home together and bitch about their French teacher, he’d retire to his room and do whatever pretty blonde Brits do in the afternoon, they’d meet unexpectedly at the same time in the late evening to have a final cup of tea, and then they’d go to bed and do it all over again. 

It was difficult for her to admit, but Y/N was falling very quickly for Draco. It was gross, and wrong, and manipulative, and completely against the code of conduct for exchange families, but she couldn’t help but spend her days fantasizing about how his gold-spun hair would feel as she ran her fingers through it or how gently she’d trace her fingers around the tattoo on the soft flesh of his forearm…

But Y/N knew those thoughts weren’t right. And they would go away. Eventually. 

“How’s it going?” Sylvia asked, effectively snapping her out of her thoughts. The Art History sub told them to go into independent study, whatever that meant. Y/N was not very good at either of those words.

“Pretty good. I can’t believe it’s been 3 weeks already,” she said. “It’s gonna be Halloween before we know it.”

“I can’t fucking waitttt,” said Sylvia. “I’m gonna be Wednesday Addams.”

“Again?”

“What else would I be? I get a new high collared black dress every year. It’d be a shame if it were going to go to waste. What are you gonna be?”

“One of the thousands of students finishing their UChicago ED app hours before the deadline.”

“You’re kidding. Can’t you just finish it the day before?”

“Where’s the fun in that? And, plus, I don’t have an idea as cool as Wednesday.”

Sylvia smirked as she opened up her planner and began to jot down something. “How’s Draco doing? I haven’t seen much of him lately. It seems like he never hangs out with us at break anymore.”

“Yeah, I ended up getting him connected with the Physics teacher. He’s getting tutored now. He thinks it’s all bullshit, but I don’t want to be the reason he doesn’t get into a good school.”

“Is that all you care about?” She smiled at Y/N. “Lizzy was telling me that you’re interested in him.”

“First of all, keep your voice down. Second of all, I’m not supposed to be, so I’m not.” Y/N hoped that the edge in her voice was convincing enough.

Her friend raised her eyebrows so dramatically that her glasses nearly slipped off her nose. “Y/N, who’s gonna hear about it. You guys are both going away at the end of the year anyways, and I’m sure he’s not going to be writing to his dear mum about his love life. If it’s consensual, there’s nothing wrong with it. I think it’d be good for both of you.”

“I see that, but let’s put me in his shoes right now.” Y/N shuffled in her seat and clasped her hands. “I’m rich. I’m British. I’m very hot. My parents throw extravagant balls for me and I kiss pretty girls that say water like ‘wota’. I’ve spent my life in silk and I only drink the finest teas. My family is so important that I had to be shipped off halfway across the world just to be safe. And now my incredibly expensive life has reached a peak because I’m sleeping with a random girl in Ohio that has run approximately 4 stop signs since I’ve met her.”

“You’re sleeping with Draco?” 

Y/N turned to see Lauren, a wide-eyed, obnoxious, but well meaning girl staring at her. She heard Sylvia stifle a laugh behind her. “No. I was kidding.” The smile that she followed with was awkward and showed way too many teeth. 

“Oh, okay,” said Lauren. “Do you know if he likes anyone?”

Sylvia’s smirk widened.

“No, actually, he’s a pretty private guy.” Y/N sent her another tense smile, and Lauren finally turned away.

“Jealous, huh?”

“Shut up, Vie. You know I wouldn’t go for him. Even if I had the chance.”

She just raised an eyebrow and smiled. 

The afternoon brought its own set of struggles. Their French teacher had blown up at another student who had been caught cheating on their last test, and it was all Y/N could do but hold back her snickers until they were out in the parking lot.

“I can’t believe they still managed to conjugate their cheat sheet wrong.” Y/N was gasping for breath as she unlocked the car door and threw her stuff inside. Draco was watching from the passenger seat, his lips in a soft upturn. “Can you imagine? Oh my god.”

He just shook his head and turned to look out the window, but she could see the smile slowly stretching across his face. “Ridiculous. You could totally tell Monsieur enjoyed it, too. I bet he gets off on making kids like Joey cry.”

“I had a teacher like that,” he started. “He was a Poti-a chemistry teacher.”

“Oh? Did he ever attack you?”

“No. He liked me. Family friends and all.”

“Ah. I almost forgot that your family was rich and influential. Thanks for the reminder.” She reached across and lightly punched his shoulder. His smile, though still remaining, seemed to shrink. “Hey, what’s that in your bag?” 

Y/N motioned to the cardstock peeking out of his nondescript black backpack that always seemed to fit more than it was meant to. She could make out a few words written in what looked like a bright red sharpie--something that did not exactly scream Draco Malfoy aesthetic.

He froze up. “Er. It’s from Heather. I think she called it a Homecoming ask?”

Y/N’s throat dried up to the point that no words would willingly make the climb from her diaphragm to her tongue; instead, she settled for giving him a little nod and what she hoped was a convincing smile.

“I told her I’d think about it,” he continued. “I remember you saying that the school dances sucked. So I let her know that I wasn’t sure yet.”

She nodded again. “Super cool. You can do whatever you want, though. You can come with my group if you’d like, but you’re welcome to go with Heather’s.”

“What? So you aren’t coming with me if I go with Heather?”

“Fuck no, dude. I don’t hate her, but I would way prefer to spend a night with my friends than some girl from my French class that only talks to me because she thinks you’re hot.” 

The expression Draco made reminded Y/N that he would never get comfortable with American girls calling him hot. “Ok. Have you found a date yet?”

“Chad from Econ asked me yesterday.”

“Is that why my seat was covered in glitter?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you going with him?” Draco’s hand was clenched tight in a fist in his lap.

“I think so,” said Y/N, steeling herself and deciding to just go for it. “But, of course, if you asked me I would say no to Chad. Just out of principle. I am supposed to be your tour guide, after all.”

The only parts of him moving were the few stray wisps of his hair being pushed around by the AC going. 

“But that’d be weird. I’d only expect you to take that up if you really didn’t want to go to the dance itself.” She swallowed and pulled out onto the main street, putting distance between them and the school. He was silent for a few moments. The quiet, normally comfortable between them, was stifling and strange. She pretended to ignore the way he was fiddling with his cuffs. 

“Yeah, it could be,” was all he said before slumping against the window and closing his eyes.

Mrs. Y/L/N was sitting at the head of the coffee table when the two arrived home, carding between a stack of letters in front of her. The mug of something--probably that new decaf blend she hadn’t stopped raving about--was sitting lopsided on a coaster, just barely about to topple off the edge. She looked like she hadn’t moved for hours, the novel she had been previously reading sat face down to preserve the spot next to her no doubt lukewarm drink.

“Hey Mom,” Y/N said as she set her keys down. “Anything good?”

She looked up, her expression morphing from startled to happy. “Other than the college brochures? Nothing, except...hm, what’s this?”

Her well manicured hand pulled at a crimson envelope, with sloping writing that seemed to shimmer in the light. 

To the Y/L/N Family, it read. The loopiness of the writing looked like it wiggled at the ends, but that had to be a trick of the light. It was dim in the kitchen during afternoons, after all. 

“It looks cool, open it u--”

“No!”

Draco’s voice had never sounded so loud as it did then as he lunged across the kitchen, snatching it out of her mother’s hand and clutching it to his chest. “Er, it’s for me. I recognize the handwriting.”

 “Cool, see you later,” said Y/N. She was up the stairs and slamming her door before either of her housemates could say another word. After the horrible embarrassment that was technically Draco’s rejection, she needed to be alone. 

Even burying her face into her pillow and squeezing her eyes shut didn’t keep the scenes from their car ride at bay. She had been so stupid, so stupid. Why did she even think he wanted that? He was her brother, after all. Oh god, does he think we’re all from Alabama or something?

She wallowed for a few more mournful minutes before deciding that she had to pick herself up and handle it like an adult. After all, she was going to be 18 in just a few months. There was no excuse for her to act like a child anymore. And, plus, it wasn’t like she couldn’t just play this off as a pity invite. Yes,that’s what she’d frame this as if he ever asked her about it again. She felt bad for him was all it was. 

Once satisfied with her internal dialogue, she rolled out of bed and made for the foyer where her bag was still on the table. She’d first walk on Legos barefoot before she had to let a stupid boy--especially one that didn’t know how to turn on their shower and had to ask for her help every time--come between her and her 4.0. Never.

Her thoughts were cut short, however, when she heard a new sound from his side of the hallway. She froze, listening closely. 

Draco was crying.

[tuanhood]

rumor

pairing: kim yugyeom x reader

genre: smut, enemies to lovers au (kind of)

warnings: 18+, public oral sex (female receiving), cursing

word count: 5k+

summary: the bane of your existence, kim yugyeom who has been bothering you consistently for the past 6 months comes to find you in the library, because well... he heard something.

a/n: keeping it going with the smut i GUESS. my russian mother would literally die if she knew i was doing this instead of writing my dissertation. :) this is barely edited but go easy on me OK. 

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Here you were. Another Thursday night in the library, endlessly highlighting the printed-out text in front of you. Your eyes shifted towards the other portion of the table you were sat at. It was filled with papers by students from the course you were TAing for and its placement in front of you was another overwhelming reminder of the work you had to accomplish before the weekend. A thought occurred to you that maybe it was worth it to take a break before you really got into grading, but as you glanced at your phone for the first in what felt like hours, you realized there was no time for a break if you wanted to finish everything on time. 

It wasn’t always like this, you used to have fun, but as time passed and you went on in your collegiate career, there was more time for work and less time for play. You wanted to say a big fuck you to your friend Mark and his “work hard, play hard” motto, because who the hell could do both equally and not ruin their life? 

Just as you were about to text Mark and ask him for 500 words on how his life mantra could be applicable to literally anyone, you heard heavy footsteps coming from somewhere on the floor of the library you occupied and it was almost as if your comfortable atmosphere shifted. As the footsteps grew closer, your body tensed up in preparation for the interruption you felt that you were about to endure. 

“Shove it Yugyeom,” you said without looking up at the tall boy. Kim Yugyeom had bothered you so much in the past 6 months that you practically had a sixth sense for whenever he was within distance. 

“Dude, why are you so mean to me?” 

Sighing, you pinched the bridge of your nose in frustration, “how many times do I have to tell you that just because our moms are friends, doesn’t mean we are.”

He pulled a chair from the table and flipped it with the back facing you, plopping down, his arms folded on the chair’s back. “Okay but the reason I’m here is actually really important.” 

Knowing Yugyeom and judging on his insistent tone, you knew it wasn’t actually going to be important. The two of you had known each other most of your lives because of your respective mother’s being lifelong friends. You had always wondered what it must have been like for them, having such a strong bond of friendship that they would make it a pact to have children at the same time and force them into being friends. Unfortunately for them neither of those things really happened – your mother became pregnant with you and it wasn’t until two years later that Yugyeom’s mother followed. However, despite the small age gap, they still tried to manufacture a friendship between the two of you. By the time you were thirteen, they gave up. 

For months Yugyeom had been finding you on campus and was constantly bothering you with things that he deemed to be paramount, but instead were things such as “what bedding do you think I should get?” or “hey are you going to your mom’s birthday party? Should we carpool?” Obviously, you would be going to your own mother’s party, so why did he have to ask you? All of his questions, comments or concerns, could easily be discussed over text, but for some reason he had to come find you in person. Every. Single. Time. 

At first you blamed it on his age and innocence. He was two years younger than you and his common appearance in your life with things that were “important,” probably had to do with his adjustment to university life. You were the only person he knew, so it was a given that he would come to you with questions or in need of advice. But after 6 months and the large friend group Yugyeom had grown on campus – you knew that had nothing do with it. 

Losing your place in your notes, you groaned and looked up at him, realizing as long as he was in your presence you wouldn’t be able to get any work done, “what is it Yugyeom? What could be so important that you had to come bother me yet again.” 

You noticed Yugyeom cower back a bit at your annoyed tone, clearly striking some kind of nerve within him and it almost made you feel regretful on how you’ve treated him lately. It was certainly much worse than you had been with him in your childhood. 

He clicked his tongue as if signaling that he meant business, “well… I came to ask about a rumor.” 

The order of business that brought Yugyeom into your midst today immediately made you let out a snort from your mouth. He still didn’t understand what “important” meant, even after all this time. You especially didn’t pay any mind to what was or wasn’t going on with Yugyeom’s little friends. Rolling your eyes, you picked up your forgotten highlighter and put it back on the page, you predicted that this visit couldn’t last much longer. “I really don’t care about what’s going on with lower classmen.” 

“It’s not about anyone in my year… It’s about you.” 

You paused, dropping the tool in your hand, once again forgotten, wondering if you had misheard him. Campus was full of hundreds – probably thousands of students more interesting than you. Nothing you’d ever done could be warranted as interesting enough to be circulated throughout campus whether real or not. “Excuse me?” 

“I heard a rumor about you.” And a rumor that was widespread enough that it could somehow make it to Yugyeom? You were certain that he had to be mistaken. 

His eyes looked around the room. You noticed they wandered to the sheets of paper in front of you, your hands and the shelves of books surrounding the table. He licked his lips before speaking to gain confidence before he continued on, “I want to know if it’s true.” 

Usually conversations with Yugyeom contained a lot of back and forth. There was never this much air that left room for thoughtful pauses or awkward silence. It had always been him asking random things or making comments that led to you snapping at him. This time you weren’t really sure what to say. Being so perplexed by the encounter and why he was concerned about a rumor regarding you, left you unsure of how to respond. 

“It’s about you and Park Jinyoung. I want to know if it’s true,” Yugyeom bit his bottom lip so hard, you thought he would draw blood. 

Blankly, you blinked at him, wondering why anyone would be fixated about you and Jinyoung, “first I kind of have to know what the rumor about the two of us is.” 

“Ugh I knew it,” Yugyeom narrowed his eyes at you, and it’s perhaps the first time you’d seen him show any kind of negative emotion. Even after all of your countless ignoring and bitter words towards him in the past, he would always maintain the same bright smile and puppy dog look in his eyes. It was something you actually admired about him. 

“Knew what? I didn’t say anything! I’m asking you what you heard. What the rumor is!” You whisper shouted, in an effort to remind yourself that you were in the library after all. 

“If it wasn’t true you would have just denied it!” Yugyeom insisted. 

Now it was your turn to be angry, through clenched teeth you asked him, “what the fuck is your problem?” 

He stood up briskly and the chair shook from his sudden stance, “you fucking Park Jinyoung, that’s my problem.” You widened your eyes at him, especially since you had hadn’t really ever heard Yugyeom curse, “what?” 

“People are saying you guys slept together.” 

His words caused you to freeze up for a moment, but you felt a need to play it off, to not show your hand. “Yugyeom… Jinyoung and I TA for the same intro Lit class. That’s it. People like to create drama… especially if it’s about their superiors.” The way you defended yourself made the hair on the back of your neck stand up. Ultimately, you had no reason to explain anything to this guy who wasn’t even classified as an acquaintance to you. Kim Yugyeom had no real place in your life. “And why does it matter to you? I can sleep with whoever I want… Not that it’s any of your business or anyone else’s.” 

For some reason you found yourself unable to look up at him. It felt different then the times you simply avoided his gaze as a method of ignoring him in the hopes he would leave. This time you felt just nauseous. First you were being defensive with him and now you felt too nervous to look at him? What was wrong with you? “So, it’s true then, huh?” 

At his words, you sighed, lifting your eyes up slowly to finally look at him again. For a moment, the thought entered your mind to lie and you had to shake the delusion out of your head. Why lie to him? You had nothing to hide, nothing to be ashamed about… and yet why did it cross your mind to be dishonest with Yugyeom, as if to shield him from it? Before you could regretfully change your mind, you responded, “yes, I slept with Jinyoung, but it was literally forever ago. We’re just friends. I don’t understand why it’s even coming up now.” 

It surprised you when you noticed his hands had clenched into fists at his side and you tried to conjure up something in your brain that could explain why he cared about this so much. Your heart pained a little from his aggression and you wondered if you were going to start wondering why you care so much about this. 

“Why do you care?” You asked, rolling your eyes to put on an act of nonchalance. 

“It’s embarrassing!” 

“Why the hell is it embarrassing?” 

His fists finally unclenched and he threw them down in annoyance at your question, as if you were supposed to be able to read his mind. He answered you as if his reasoning was the most obvious thing in the world, “my friends keep teasing me about it!” You couldn’t help but notice the way he whined at the end of his sentence, like a small child being annoyed about finishing their food. 

“Yugyeom… I don’t think I’m following. Why does who I do or don’t sleep with embarrassing for you?” 

“Because…” he took a deep breath in as if contemplating whether he should go on and there was a long pause before he continued, “because it’s embarrassing that this is going around about someone I like.” 

Shock washed over the features on your face. This was it? This was the reason why he had been acting so ridiculous? You certainly weren’t expecting that. “You have feelings for Jinyoung? I-I’m sorry Yugyeom, but I swear it’s in the past… and if it makes you feel any better it wasn’t even that good of-” He cut you off briskly not wanting to hear where you had been going with the thought.

“No, I don’t like Jinyoung.” He rolled his eyes out of frustration at your lack of understanding. 

“Then I don’t know what you’re talk-” this time you cut yourself off when your brain finally caught up to the rest of you. If he didn’t like Jinyoung... that meant he likes the other person in the rumor… and that other person in the rumor was in fact you. Which meant that Yugyeom must like… 

“Me? You like me?” Your voice got higher, a nervous habit that continued to grow whenever you were in a stressful situation. A situation you couldn’t easily see the conclusion of. 

Judging on Yugyeom’s gaze, one could say that the conversation didn’t faze him – that he was confident even, but as you glanced down, you were met with the fidgeting and shuffling of his feet. “Yeah. I do, so what?” 

After all this time and after everything you had said or done to him, he still liked you? 

You looked back up to his face and saw the hard and cold exterior he tried to put up between the two of you. He was attempting to make it seem like he didn’t care. That putting his feelings for you out in the open and holding his heart out in front of you was no big deal. You knew from knowing Yugyeom from all these years that this was no simple feat for him. You knew he was probably shaking inside, nervous and afraid of the rejection that he had expected to come from you. He had put on an act, because he thought that’s what you wanted and because he didn’t want to show you his true feelings when the hurt that he knew was coming finally came. 

You studied his face for a moment, his features and glimpsed into his eyes that you knew would hold how he really felt. 

Yugyeom felt the silence between the two of you get heavier and heavier with every moment that passed. He felt uncomfortable and he just wanted you to tell him what he knew he was probably going to hear from you. “I bet I’m ten times better than Park Jinyoung,” Yugyeom mumbled quietly to himself, clearly not meaning for you to hear it, but hear it you did. 

His words shocked you and you felt a nervous flip in your stomach, but the good kind. For some reason you couldn’t help but think back to Mark’s stupid motto as you looked Yugyeom up and down, checking him out. Before you could process what, you were doing, you began to gather all of your things on the table without a word to Yugyeom. When you were finally done you saw the panic in his face as he wondered if you were just going to leave him without a word. Instead you surprised him, placing your backpack in one hand and you grabbed his hand with the other, “follow me.” 

He didn’t move and you almost fell back against him at his pull, “where are we going?” 

“You’ll see come on,” you rolled your eyes at him and tugged him forward once again towards the stairwell of the library. Both of you climbed the stairs in silence, and you found yourself grateful that he followed you. It was difficult for you to understand what it was about the situation that had you more nervous – that he had come with you or that you were doing this at all. 

When you finally reached the fifth floor you led him through various stacks of books and multiple rows of shelves until you were both in the back corner of the floor. You stopped in between two shelves and he glanced around the books surrounding you, “why are we in medieval literature?” he asked.

“Because no one ever comes up here.” 

He blinked quickly, not understanding your reasoning for bringing him up multiple flights of stairs to be amongst more dusty books. 

“And there are no security cameras up here,” you continued, hoping that something would click for him. If it took him much longer to figure out what you were trying to communicate, you were afraid you might lose your confidence in doing this. You tapped your foot lightly against the ground, “so are you going to show me?” 

“Show you what?” He asked completely oblivious. At this point, he was just grateful that you hadn’t kicked his ass after he had confessed to you. He had to be honest with himself, he hadn’t come to find you expecting to tell you about his feelings for you. He thought they had been clear from the beginning, but after the third or fourth time you had reacted negatively to him appearing in your life during these past 6 months, he figured that you would never see it without him explicitly telling you. And judging on how much you seemed to hate him – he had come to the conclusion that he would never tell you. But after hearing about you and Park Jinyoung from his friend Bambam, he couldn’t stop himself from marching to the one place he knew you would be on Thursday night – the library. 

Yugyeom had always pictured your reaction if he was to tell you about his feelings for you and it always ended with him having a bloody nose, a new bruise or a pain in his foot after you stomped down on it in anger or disgust. The worst part of this situation was that so far you hadn’t done any of these things and for once he didn’t know what to expect when it came to you, somehow that scared him more than being flat out rejected. Wait… maybe you were bringing him up to the isolated section of the library to do your damage and hit him? 

“Jesus fucking Christ Yugyeo-” You cut yourself short when you noticed your hands had involuntarily thrusted towards him, clenching as if you were about to wring his neck and the way your tone shifted to frustration. Exhaling, you relaxed your hands and put them down, rubbing them against your thighs to calm yourself down. You weren’t trying to be your normal self towards Yugyeom, you were trying something… different. Much different. 

It seemed to you that the only way you’d be able to get Yugyeom to well… get it was spelling it out for him. 

“You said you bet you were ten times better than Jinyoung... so show me.”

Nothing leaves Yugyeom’s mouth in response and he stared at you blankly. Had you read this wrong? Were you embarrassing yourself? At his lack of words, you felt your confidence chip away piece by piece and your face grew hot. 

Then everything seemed to fall into place for Yugyeom as his mind begins to compute the words leaving your soft pink lips that he’s wanted to kiss for so long. He noticed the way that your eyes are no longer fixated on him, and instead begin to look over the place nervously, pretending to find the books around the two of you more interesting. 

Due to the lack of response from Yugyeom, you’re surprised when you he takes a step closer towards you and you feel his hot breath near you just as your eyes became glued to a text about women’s literature in the Middle Ages. 

You looked to his brown eyes which stared at you so deeply you felt as though you’re about to suffocate. Although Yugyeom’s always been much taller than you, you’ve always somehow felt bigger than him – older, wiser and more mature. But for the first time ever, under his hypnotic gaze you felt innocent, small and like all you wanted was for him to take care of you. 

As he took another step forward, you took one back until you’re pressed against the bookshelf, unable to take back your decision, but you could feel that deep inside of you that you didn’t want to. Both his hands went to either side above you on the shelf and he looked down at you, a new lustfulness in his eyes that wasn’t there before. “Is this okay?” 

Nodding your head, you bit your lip to stop the smile that dared to spread across your face and Yugyeom caught it immediately. He brought his right hand down to your hair and brushed some of the strands out of your face softly, “you know… you don’t have to pretend to be this cold, mean person all the time… If you want to feel something, you should just… feel it.” At his final words his hand moved to a permanent position on your cheek as he leaned down to connect your lips together. At first you remained frozen, but as his left-hand slides from the bookshelf to land comfortably at your waist as if it was always meant to be there, you melted into the kiss. Your lips parted and his tongue slipped into your waiting mouth softly, without rush or urgency and somehow that gentleness alone made you feel like all that existed was that softness and the mixing of your breaths. 

The slow, sensual pace that you savored soon began to pick up as Yugyeom deepened the kiss, pushing himself closer to you on the shelf. Your hands that had remained mostly stagnant and at your sides soon began to drift up to run through his hair as if they had a mind on their own. When you first heard him let out a small moan from your tugging on his locks, you felt a fire ignite inside of you that told you that you wanted to hear more. With every tug, Yugyeom’s fingers dug into your hips and soon he let out a sigh of content as his hands moved to rest on your ass. Your lips worked seamlessly together as if it was the missing puzzle piece you never knew you needed. 

“Let me show you something else I can do better than Park Jinyoung,” Yugyeom said through a raspy breath, against your lips. His hands squeezed your ass before they moved around to the button on your jeans to undo them. It feels as though he works in slow motion as he pulled down the zipper and moved his hand inside, slipping them over your panties. His lips still on you and his hand in a place where you never thought you would need him; your breath grew heavier and heavier. 

Your knees buckled as Yugyeom’s fingers suddenly brushed your clit through the thin cloth and he grinned into the kiss as he wrapped his arms around your waist to hold you up. You tried to focus on the feeling of Yugyeom’s fingers rubbing your through your underwear, but soon he withdraws them. You whimpered at the loss of his fingers against you and he gave you one last soft peck before he disconnected his mouth from yours as well. You missed the contact, wanting to make your lips even more swollen than they probably already were. 

Yugyeom chuckled at your needy reaction and he caressed your cheek in a reassuring manner, “don’t worry it’ll be worth it.” 

You grew confused, wondering what his next move would be, but as he crouches down onto his knees in front of you, pulling your jeans and underwear down with him it begins to dawn on you. You felt yourself grow more wet at the thought. 

“I need to taste you,” he practically whined, “let me clean up the mess I made between your legs.” If Yugyeom had said anything remotely close to that in the past, you know you would have smacked him across the face, but instead you felt yourself involuntarily moan, turned on by his words. 

Still leant up against the bookshelf, you spread your legs apart, which was proven difficult with the jeans and underwear around your ankles, but Yugyeom grabbed them in an effort to help you. When you were comfortable and well situated, he settled himself between your parted thighs and grew closer. 

First all you felt was his hot breath on your clit and he softly blew to tease you, as if paying you back for all the countless you shrugged him off. When you let out a whimper that sounded a little too desperate, even for your ears, he decided his short-lived teasing was better off short. He took one last look into your eyes before he leaned in without hesitation. His tongue first gave a slow lap as if savoring your taste, and he let out a groan that made you feel more wet than you already were. Soon he began to pick up the pace and he used the way your hips moved against him and the little sighs coming from your mouth to feel what it was that you like and don’t like. When he sealed his mouth around your clit in a soft suck, your hands instinctually went back to his hair to bring him even closer to you. 

“How do you taste so good,” he mumbled mostly to himself, followed by a noisy kiss and delving into you further. 

A sudden and continuous swirl of his tongue against your clit caused you to let out a loud moan that you couldn’t hold back even with all of the strength in your body. With his lips still attached to your clit and continuing his ministrations, he tapped his fingers on your thighs in an effort to remind you to be quiet. You both may have been in a secluded part of the library, but you were still in the library. 

It was when you really looked down at Yugyeom that you felt as though you were going to combust. For some reason to see the younger boy that you had completely written off for most of your life, and especially the last 6 months, with his mouth on your clit with a look of pure satisfaction on his face made you feel closer to your high. 

His sudden harsh sucking as if he was a man eating his last meal, caused you to lift your hips off against the book shelf and into his face further. 

“Yugyeom…” You moaned out with eyes squeezing themselves shut. Hearing his name fall from your lips in bliss – something he had always wanted and dreamed about – edged him to go even harder and faster, wanting nothing more to see you fall apart before him. 

When he slipped two fingers inside of you, pumping them quickly, with his lips still attached to your core, you began to feel dizzy just at the pleasure. He pulled his mouth away for a moment to watch his fingers sink in and out you, pleased to look up and see how overcome you were with the way he was making you feel. You let out another cry when his fingers curled in you, finding your g-spot with ease. When he reattached himself to your clit and his fingers found that spot in you once again, it all became too much and you felt yourself closer to your climax. You tried to push his face away from you, trying to let him know that you were close. 

“Cum on my face. I want it, I want it all,” he said muffled against your core at your effort to move him away from you. 

At his words and the continual, brutal pace of his tongue and fingers, you felt your hips buck into Yugyeom’s face and yourself clench around his fingers, orgasm washing over you hard. You attempted to keep your moans in, but the feeling you get through out your entire body is too much to contain as you let out a load cry from your release. One of your hands left Yugyeom’s hair to aggressively grip the book shelf behind you, causing a book to fall from the shelf and hit part of Yugyeom’s head and his back on the way down. 

“F-Fuck Yugyeom I’m sor-” He shut you up as he continued to lap at your core, letting you ride out your orgasm as if he was in his own world where a book didn’t just fall on him. 

After a few moments in your own blissed out state and deep breaths with your head against the book shelf, you looked to see Yugyeom getting up off of his knees. His mouth and jaw glistened from you and if he minded how wet your release was, he didn’t show any sign of it. On his way up to stand before you, he lifted your underwear and jeans up your legs. 

He smiled smugly, “not bad for a kid, huh?” 

You shyly looked away from him, feeling like the kid. 

“Yeah whatever, Kim Yugyeom,” You said rolling your eyes, and he catches the smile that was written across your face. When your eyes met again, he stared at you so deeply with so much fondness that you felt yourself grow weak for the second time in the last few minutes. 

Bringing your hand up to gently rest on his cheek, you pulled him in for a kiss, wanting to show him the same pleasure he gave you. He let out a loud groan when your hands reached his jeans in an attempt to unbutton them. 

“Um… hello?” 

You both froze at the voice and broke apart to look at each other in panic.

“Shit,” you whispered to him. 

Yugyeom widened his eyes as if asking you what to do, “don’t look at me!” 

“Is uh… someone there? Or… two someones?” The unknown voice called out into the stacks. The sound of the voice made you feel sick. You didn’t know how long they were there or how much they had heard and especially because you were 90% sure you knew the voice. 

When Yugyeom looked at you again with fear in his eyes, you realized the roles had been reversed once again and you were back to being the older, wiser one out of the two of you. This time however, his look to you for guidance didn’t annoy you as it had in the past. Instead, you felt your stomach flip and it go straight to your core. 

Your eyes wandered to the floor, where you see the piece of literature that fell and hit Yugyeom. Reaching down to grab it, you motioned for Yugyeom to crouch down with you, “okay, on the count of three, you’ll grab my backpack and I’m going to throw this the opposite way. They’ll probably hear it and go look where the noise came from. That’s when we’ll run towards the exit.” 

“Why do I have to carry your backpack?” Yugyeom whined. 

Rolling your eyes, you answered him, “because a gentleman always carries a lady’s things.” “You just want to be the one who throws the book.” 

You shrugged, pretending like he didn’t have you figured out already, “now come on,” both standing back up you nodded at him to signal the beginning of your countdown. 

“One…” you whispered, looking back at Yugyeom who licked his lips in anticipation, “two…” 

You paused hearing footsteps, “three!” you scream whispered at him as you threw the book in the opposite direction, in one of the book stacks, praying you don’t get seen. At the end of the countdown, Yugyeom grabbed your backpack and your free hand, both of you running towards the exit. 

You both practically stumbled down the stairs of the library, unable to contain your laughs as soon as you’re free and on the front steps outside. 

When finally caught your breath from the running and laughter, it dawned on you the events that had just taken place and what you actually just did in the library. “Holy shit… I can’t believe we actually did that. That was kinda fucked up wasn’t it? That we did that in there?”

“You said no one goes into the Medieval Lit section!” Yugyeom complained as soon as he’s caught his breath. 

You bit your lip and nervously looked at him, “Well for the most part no one really does! There’s only one person I know of that does…” 

“Who?” 

“Park Jinyoung.” 

He let out a snort, “I can’t believe you.” 

You shoved Yugyeom lightly, “It’s not like I knew he would show up!” At your words he pulled you towards him and close enough until his mouth brushed your ear, “I bet you wanted him to catch us. You dirty girl.” 

With widened eyes and once again turned on by none other than Kim Yugyeom you moved away from him gently and take his hand in yours, “come on.” 

“Where are we going?” He asked for the second time of the night.

“My place. I have something I want to show you,” You answered him, attempting to pull him forward again. “Oh and what’s that?” He had a smug smile on his face, clearly wanting to torture you. 

“Kim Yugyeom, I swear to God,” you wondered if he was really going to do this to you, “you better come with me so we can finish what we started or I’m starting a rumor about you.” 

He pulled your arm until you were back against him, your body flush with his front and you felt his hands go to your ass, “nah I know you wouldn’t do that.”

You pushed your hips against him and he let out a soft groan at the contact against him, his hardness being neglected this entire time, “try me.” 

He smirked at you, “fine… let’s go before I fuck you on the steps of the library. Then there’d be a rumor about both of us.” 

“If that happened that wouldn’t be a rumor. That would just be fact,” you explained to him, grabbing his hand again. 

“So that’s a yes?” 

You rolled your eyes at him and smiled. Kim Yugyeom was doing things to you and making you feel things that you couldn’t deny it any longer, “come on Yugyeom.” 

“Yes ma’am.”

[minyoonmeme]

Normalcy of the Pretty Posse

Chapter 1 

Word Count: 2494

Pairing: reader x ?????

Genre: like 90% fluff, 10% stupid jokes and bad humor

Description: Stupid Jeongguk and his cute sweaters and pretty posse of hyungs. 

(Disclaimer: This will probably have some typos. I started writing this instead of doing some Statistics homework and spent so long on it that I have zero time to edit. Sorry~)

next

masterlist

There was no game plan. There never really had been, at least not for me. Making it past 16 was something I had never foreseen, never imagined I could do. And now, here I am, alone in a country in a university far from home with no idea how life is supposed to go. Okay, maybe I’m being pessimistic because I’m not completely alone. I have friends if you count the two idiots who don’t let me drown in takeout boxes on weekends. They’re wonderful, they really are, I promise. 

Yoonjin is the sweetest person I’ve ever met no matter how much I want to strangle her into putting herself first. She’s the one who calls me about anything and everything. Don’t tell her that I secretly love that she calls me first when something happens. Chaebin is my right hand gal. My broski. My homegirl. My uh… well she’s great honestly. She’s all bark and no bite with the strongest affiliation for cute things, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. These two are pretty much my whole life other than the impending doom of my failing future that I have chosen to personally personify. Makes it less scary if it's punchable, honestly. 

“Are you gonna actually do your work or are you gonna stare at your coffee all day?

Rolling my head to the side, I eye Chaebin with the blankest face I can muster. 

“I didn’t ask to be criticized when I asked you to come to the library with me.” 

“No, but you did ask me to make sure you finish your paper in time for practice tonight. Yoonjin will cry if you let her go by herself again.” I groan, throwing my head against the cushion of the booth’s chair. She’s right, I know she is. I’ve missed two weeks of dance workshops and Yoonjin, without missing a beat, after every workshop comes knocking on my door teary eyed and sputtering about how she was all alone and lost without me there. Food usually helps soften her up. 

“You think she’ll forgive me if I miss just one more week?” Chaebin twitches her eyebrow up as she side eyes me from her computer. I slump even further and push my laptop farther away in favor of laying my head down. “You’re right. She’ll probably accuse me of abandoning her and our friendship if I skip one more time.” 

“I’ve literally seen you pump out a 12 page research paper in 3 hours, just go dance or whatever tonight and stress yourself later.” 

“Anxiety and Red Bull are a toxic combo, but I’ll have you know that I got a 94 on that paper.” Smiling smugly, I turn my head to look at her. She’s not wearing her glasses today, so it’s hard to tell if she’s glaring at me or blind today. “If I bail, are you gonna be okay by yourself? I can swing by afterwards with Yoonjin, so you don’t have to walk home alone tonight.” 

Her glare softens as she shakes her head no before grabbing some eyedrops. Oh. So she is wearing her contacts. “No, I’ll be okay. I came packing.” Her right hand pats her bag before she smirks and continues searching through her syllabus. 

I eye her bag warily and half jokingly say, “Please, tell me you don’t have a gun.” 

Her face scrunches as she stares at me. “Are you stupid? Why would I have a gun? I meant I have my phone and a taser. Do I look like I know how to shoot a gun?” 

I shrug and start packing up my bag. My joints scream and pop from being stationary so long. “I am, do I look like I know how to shoot a gun? You never know Chae, I could be a highly skilled marksman just waiting to take someone out. I might not even be a real college student, just a really good undercover assassin.” 

Her nose twitches as she clicks open a few browsers. “You almost cried last night when you saw a stray cat ignore you. I highly doubt you’re killing anyone these days.” 

“Animals love me and that one hurt, don’t use my feelings against me. Don’t you remember when you cried because you thought I was ignoring you last year?” Her face dropped as she coughed into her shirt, trying to hide the red splotches. “I was literally sick for three days and you came to my apartment with food because you thought I hated you. What was it you said? Something about not being allowed to hate you if you fed me.” 

“We don’t talk about junior year, I was going through it.” Her voice was tight, but I could tell she was amused. “It’s almost 6 o’clock, you should text Yoonjin and tell her that you’re not abandoning her tonight.” She slides my bag towards me and lets me scoot past her out of the booth. 

“Yoonjin and I will be by later to walk you back to your apartment around 9:30. Sound good?” My legs wiggle as I try and get a feeling back into them from sitting so long. When I stand there longer than normal, her eyes flash up as she nods and waves her hand at me to leave. 

To: Yoonjin the Trash Bin

You wanna meet outside the commons tonight or walk over together?

From: Yoonjin the Trash Bin

WAHH 

YOU”RE COMMING? No more awkwardly standing in the back by myself!?!?!? :)))))))

[crying egg dog.pdf]

let’s meet in the the commons

To: Yoonjin the Trash Bin

7? By the double doors upstairs?

From: Yoonjin the Trash Bin

No, no, no my friend come ASAP. We have much to discuss.

To: Yoonjin the Trash Bin

Uh okay???? See you in like 10 minutes I guess??? 

From: Yoonjin the Trash Bin

See you! <3

_______________________________________________________________________

“You actually did come.” Yoonjin’s hand reaches out and pinches my arm before she settles back against the wall. “I thought for sure your text was all some weird daydream I had conjured up.”

“Chaebin convinced me that our friendship was on the line if I left you alone at another workshop for the third week in a row.” My bag landed on the ground as I slide down next to Yoonjin. Her hair, newly cut and dyed to a short choppy greyish purple bob, was still something I needed to get used to. Yoonjin had failed her midterm last week and as a result decided that her hair would rejuvenate her life and, thus, her will to study. I still don’t think she’s bought her textbooks for this semester yet, but that’s not my business. 

“As she should! It was your idea to start coming to these dance things, and you left me!” Despite her anger, she still turned her smoothie toward me as an offering. “I look like a loose limbed monkey in there. At least with you there, you explain the steps to me.” I choke on the smoothie a little bit, as she crosses her arms.

“Loose limbed monkey? Yoon, you look fine! These workshops are meant for people who don’t have dance experience. It was your idea to try dancing, I just found a place to do it” Her face contorts as she sips on her smoothie again, shaking it to mix it up and get some frustration out. 

“It wouldn’t be so bad if people like you or Jeong-fucking-guk didn’t kept coming. It’s not fair to suck and then have to watch you two just like magically do it.” Her head gets thrown back with a thud as she grunts. Immediately I laugh and rub the back of her head in oder to soothe the soon to be ache. 

“I can go if you want since you seem to not want me or Jeongguk here apparently.” Her eyes dart over to me in the most non threatening but threatening way possible for someone like her. “Okay, so I’ll stay. Make your mind up Yoonjin, I can’t keep playing these games with you.” I click my tongue against my teeth as she smacks my thigh closest to her. “You said something about Jeongguk coming right? Since when does he come out to these things? I thought he was a dance and choreography minor? Shouldn’t he be with the big dogs or something in like a real class dancing?” 

Yoonjin hums, offering me the rest of her smoothie. It’s a green looking health smoothie from a self proclaimed health bar down the street. It’s for sure my favorite, and definitely not her’s, so I take it and nudge her as a thanks. “That’s the thing, I didn’t even know he went to these things. Usually I just hang out with you and everyone else who hides in the back with me, but last week he came up to me and asked if you were still coming.” I raise my eyebrows in surprise and nod for her to continue. “I told him you’ve been busy and he kinda just nodded and shuffled away. He did tell me to tell you to take it easy though.” “Were you ever planning on telling me that a boy approached you about me?” 

“I'm telling you now and that’s all that matters. Besides, I thought you swore off men after the mishap freshman year with that one Tinder date.” 

Immediately my face heats up, and I grimace at the memory. “We don’t talk about that for a good reason, you brat.” If she’s mad I called her a brat, her smug smile doesn’t show it. I go to open my mouth and further yell at her for bringing up the traumatizing story when a pair of black heavy boots skids to a stop by my stretched out legs. 

Okay, so here's the thing about Jeon Jeongguk . He is terrifyingly good looking. So much so that looking at him hurts, like physically hurts. Jeon Jeongguk could punch me in the face and I would say thank you for the attention and bow before passing out. Okay, that’s perhaps way too far but he is attractive and built. God, is he built. And he’s not even an asshole about it! Most guys who exercise thrive on showing off their bodies and flaunting their muscles. Not Jeon Jeongguk , though., Nope! Jeongguk wears sweaters and button ups that make him resemble a Korean version of Mr. Rogers. All smiles and kind eyes with a heart of gold. Men like Jeongguk are the reason I have heart issues and top notch acting skills. 

“You’re back!” My eyes blink a few times at Jeongguk before I register that he's looking at and me actually speaking. When I don’t say anything Jeongguk fiddles with the sleeve of his shirt and looks at Yoonjin before letting out a cough. He speaks a little calmer now, more airy and rushed. “Yoonjin said you’ve been busy and I was worried you weren’t gonna come back ‘til next semester. Not that I worried about you or like not not worried about you, but uh…” He sputtered a little and lets out a small huff of air before ruffling his hair back. My lips pressed together as I swing from internally swooning over his cuteness to the attractiveness of him pushing his hair back. “It’s good so see you back. Hobi hyung, says it's good to have some experienced people in the class to encourage and help beginners.”

“Is that why you keep coming too?” 

Maybe he doesn’t expect my question or for me answer him at all, but he blinks a little too hard and shyly looks over my shoulder rather than my face. It’s cute and maybe it makes a smile break out on my face. Just maybe though. “Yes! Hobi-hyung asked me to help him since he can’t uh ya know help everyone at once.” He doesn’t sound too sure of himself, but I let it go seeing as this is our first comprehensible conversation. 

“That’s sweet of you to help your hyung for free. Does Hoseok-shi think I’m there to do the same? I feel a little bad missing the past two weeks if you’ve been doing it all by yourself.” I frown and pinch my eyebrows a little tighter, looking the direction of the doors. Should I apologize? Yoonjin beside me, I can tell, has grown more and more interested in our conversation as she undoubtedly is texting our group-chat with Chaebin about what's happening. She nudges me to focus when the conversation stalls a little. The nerve of her, I swear.

Jeongguk , getting redder and slightly more panicky, shakes his head no a little too roughly. His hair looks a little messed up, and I nearly squeal with the need to fix the adorable mess that he is right now. Outside, however, I just smile softly and encourage him to explain. “Hobi-hyung and I are okay, you’re just like an added bonus to class cause you know you obvious have some experience with your technic and seem to pick up the dances quickly.” It’s a little rushed, but I think I make out everything he’s saying.

“Are you trying to say I’m a good dancer Jeongguk ?” It’s meant to be lighthearted and playful, but Jeongguk physically widens his eyes and looks everywhere, but in my direction for a few seconds before he stops trying to voice anything out just nods. My hands clasp in my lap as a I suppress a smile and will the flush to disappear from my cheeks. “Thanks, you dance really well too. I can see why you’re studying dance.” 

Jeongguk whispers the faintest, “Thank you,” before shoving his thumb in the direction of the door indicating that he’s gonna help them set up for the workshop. I wave goodbye and watch as he does the same and dashes behind the door. Now that he’s gone, I can breathe a little easier. That was probably the weirdest experience I’ve had today, or this week for that matter. Pretty people don’t just go up to me and talk, let alone me of all people. And when I say pretty people, I mean pretty people like Jeongguk and his pretty posse of friends.  Jeongguk and his hyungs are just uncommonly so pretty and somehow together all the time. Even now Jeongguk is inside with Jung Hoseok, a graduate student who hosts the beginner dance workshops on Thursday. The fact that  Jeongguk even talked to me, or asked about me last is enough to twist my insides a little. Normal people talk to people all of the time, but  Jeongguk was not normal and his hyungs are not normal. I mean they are, but they project this ethereal aura that just intimidates everyone. So, why for the love of God was Jeon Jeongguk just talking to me?

“Are we gonna talk about what just happened or are you gonna keep staring at the door?”

“Shut up, I'm trying to process everything.”

[horansqueen]

Stuck With You - Chapter 15

Chapter 15: Some Say

🡪chapter 1  🡪chapter 2  🡪chapter 3  🡪chapter 4  🡪chapter 5  🡪chapter 6   🡪chapter 7  🡪chapter 8  🡪chapter 9  🡪chapter 10  🡪chapter 11 🡪chapter 12 🡪chapter 13 🡪chapter 14

College Enemies To Lovers AU

characters // masterlist // instagrams // mood board

I will find the time, we will find the timing 'Cause you are on my mind, I hope that you don't mind it

And I know it might sound stupid but for me, yeah yeah I just gotta keep believing and I've heard

Some say you will love me one day And I will wait, I will wait to get your loving one day Just say you will love me one day And I will wait, I will wait to get your loving one day

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                                                I felt my heart threaten to jump out of my chest as we both stood motionless. Niall's eyes met mine and I shook my head slightly.

"No..." I whispered, suddenly finding back the use of my legs and taking the few steps separating me from the buttons. "Fuck, no."

I started hitting all the buttons as my heart was racing until I felt Niall's presence next to me. He put his hands over mine to stop me and grabbed my fingers, pulling gently on them to make me turn around.

"Devon.."

I looked up in his eyes and for a reason I ignored, it calmed me immediately. I blinked a few times, barely believing that once again, I was stuck somewhere with Niall, and I was starting to wonder if it wasn't a joke from fate. Someone out there was probably having a laugh from locking us together and I just closed my eyes and sighed.

I was trying to sober up but it wasn't easy, and when I opened my eyes again, I could swear I saw anxiety the way Niall was looking at me. He gripped my fingers tighter and all the anger I felt towards him faltered, almost disappearing.

"Okay, I'll call Lewis."

He let go of my hands, making my arms fall on each sides of my body as I watched him. Quickly, he grabbed his phone from his pocket, almost drpping it, and composed a number after putting his phone on speaker. It took half a minute for Lewis to answer, and I was feeling more and more nervous with every ring.

"Maaate, where are you? It's complete darkness here! Even the lights outside are off."

Niall glanced up at me before looking back down at his phone and licked his lips. I didn't know if it was the alcohol running in my veins but I ended up staring at his mouth for way too long and took a step closer.

"Okay you need to call your landlord, I'm literally stuck in the elevator." Niall quickly explained, ignoring everything his friend told him.

"You are?" Lewis asked before bursting into laughter. "What were you even doing there?"

This time, Niall looked up in my eyes and his lips parted. "I'm.. I'm here with Devon."

"Wait wait, you're stuck in the elevator with Devon?"

Once again, he started laughing so loud I actually moved my upper body slightly back, as if it would change anything. Niall just rolled his eyes and sighed, waiting for him to stop laughing.

"Come on, just call your landlord will you?"

"Everyone here started doing nasty things everywhere in the dark." Lewis added with a chuckle. "And Mandy is looking for you."

My heart dropped in my chest and Niall's gaze moved away from mine, avoiding it. "Lewis, you know I can't stay here okay, call someone. I don't care if it's the fucking police okay? You get someone to make that fuckin' elevator work again!"

Once again, his words hurt me more than they were supposed to. Was being locked with me that bad that he couldn't handle it even just a few minutes? Or was he just too impatient to go find Mandy?

"Yea yea, no worries, i'm on it. I'll text you about it." Lewis replied as I took a few steps back slowly and leaned again the wall. He started laughing again and I heard Niall sigh for a second time. "I can't believe you're stuck there with Devon! This is the most hilarious shit that happened tonight!"

I didn't understand why it was so funny but perhaps Lewis was just too drunk to be coherent, or I was too drunk to get the joke.

"Yea. Hilarious." Niall let out sarcastically.

"Oh hey mate while you're there, maybe you could tell Devon about-"

I held my breath when Niall took off the speakers and brought his phone to his ear before turning his back to me. It made me frown, wondering what Lewis was about to say that was so bad that Niall didn't want me to hear. Was he asking Niall to tell me how much I annoyed him? If that was the case, it was clearly not necessary. I knew I had been annoying Niall since day 1 and I probably always would. It was true, he has actually been kind with me in the past 24 hours and I was still not sure why, but he had been rude and mean to me way more often than not. Of course, he had kissed me twice also, and those were moves I still didn't really understand.

"Shut up and get us out of here!"

He hung up quickly and turned back to me, his eyes now roaming on me as I leaned my head against the wall. "What was so funny?"

"Nothing. He's just pissed."

"Are you impatient to get out of here so you can go back to her and let her literally sex-kiss you in front of everyone?"

His lips curled slightly on the right in an amused smile. "Sex-kiss me?" he repeated, raising his eyebrows.

"Yea. Pushing her tongue so deep on your mouth and making sex sounds."

"Is that what she did back there?" he asked, his smirk growing as he took a step closer.

"You should know it. She's probably not the first or last girl you'll be having sex with." I pointed out rudely, making him lose his smile and frown.

"Okay, what does that mean exactly?" he asked cautiously as I nodded. "Are you slut-shaming me?"

His expression surprised me but I just shrugged. "Tell me I'm wrong."

He scoffed and shook his head, placing himself in front of me, forcing me to raise my chin up to look in his eyes. "So basically you think I sleep with every single girl I meet? That I just see a pretty girl and kiss her or bring her to my bed to shag her? You don't know shit about me but you just judge me and decide what kind of person I am by just looking at me?"

"She doesn't even have to be pretty." I pointed out, feeling my heart jump at my confession.

It took him a few seconds to understand and his face changed. His shoulders moved down and he seemed to relax slightly, closing his eyes for a few seconds and sighing again. When his eyes met mine, I could tell he knew I was talking about myself. I could read it in the way he was looking at me.

"For your information, Mandy is the only girl I slept with since... well, she's the only girl I slept with in over a year. Happy?"

No, I was not happy. The fact that he literally only had sex with her made everything even worse. It was impossible to shag someone for so long without developing some sort of feelings for them.

"Why did Lewis say you'd kill him if he accepted that I moved in with him?"

Niall turned around and grabbed his phone, checking to see if he got a text message. "Because Lewis is an idiot, that's why." he looked up and stared at me for a while. I could feel he was a bit angry at me and I was not sure why but I probably deserved it. "Why were you leaving?"

"Because." I just replied in a low tone, looking away.

I wrapped my arms around myself like this move could shield me from his words, from his questions, and from his eyes.

"Because what?" he insisted a bit louder. "I answer your questions now it's your turn!"

"Because you.. you kiss me! And you.. you press your body on me and, and and your cock is pressing on my thigh! And you pull away and leave like it didn't matter! Like you do that to random girls all the fucking time! And you like my instagram posts in less than a minute like you actually turned the fucking notifications on! And then you invite me here like we're friends or some bullshit like that! But this girl is all over you and she literally makes out with you in front of everyone!"

I felt my heart beat so hard in my chest that it throbbed all over my body. Normally, I'd be ashamed of all the things I had just thrown at him but at the moment, stuck in an elevator and totally drunk, I really didn't care. In fact, it made me feel better than I thought it would.

"You know you're making no sense right now."

"Oh shut up!"

We remained motionless and silent for a few minutes and he finally moved back to lean on the other wall, his arms crossed on his chest. I finally let myself slide down against the wall until my butt touched the floor and sighed loud.

"I don't do that all the time, okay." he finally talked. "It just... It just happened!"

"Twice?"

"Yes ok? It just happened twice!" I didn't answer but simply rolled my eyes and he continued. "And about instagram, well I just happened to be scrolling through it."

"Right."

I sighed low and closed my eyes, trying to empty my mind from all of this, but after a few minutes, I heard him curse low. I opened my eyes and he was crouching down, his face looking at the floor, and it made me frown.

"Niall?" I moved my head, trying to see him better. "Are you alright?"

I watched as he gripped the back of his head with his hands and let out a short groan as I felt my heart skip a beat. I crawled to him on my knees slowly and finally sat on my legs, tilting my upper body a bit. It was making me nervous and the fact that I was so drunk that everything seemed to be slightly moving around me didn't help.

"Seriously, Niall, what's wrong?"

"Lewis texted me and said that we may be stuck here for a while and I just..." he seemed panicked and held my breath. "I'm.. I'm claustrophobic okay?"

Out of anything he could have told me, that was one thing I didn't expect at all. I put my back straight again and my lips parted. I shook my head a bit and licked my lips before looking at his hands as they gripped his own hair.

"But we've been stuck together in places before..."

"The basement of the library was big, and there was a window in the bathroom." he pointed out very quickly.

So the reason he wanted to be out of here as soon as possible was not because he couldn't stand to be with me, or because he wanted to see Mandy. I felt extra guilty for thinking about that at that exact moment and shook my head, trying to get rid of that thought.

"What am I... what should I do? How can I help?"

He didn't answer, he just let himself fall on his butt, his legs spread, and leaned his head against the wall, his eyes shut. I placed my hand gently on his shoulder and his eyes fluttered open. He seemed so fucked I thought he could pass out.

"Hey, look at me, okay?" I whispered, raising my eyebrows. "We can breathe together. Okay?"

He blinked a few times and nodded. I searched for his fingers and grabbed them, licking my lips. I was getting nervous too, and I honestly had no idea what to do to help him.

"Nothing's gonna happen to us, okay? So when I squeeze your fingers, we slowly breathe in, and when I stop we breathe out."

"Okay."

"Okay."

We did this for a few minutes but stress was slowly invading me and after a while, he finally closed his eyes again.

"Help me change my mind, Devie, I need to think about something else than the fact that we're stuck here." he let out a bit louder.

"I don't... I don't know what to do." I admitted, feeling myself tear up at how powerless I was.

"Anything, just, do something!" he insisted, making my heartbeats accelerate suddenly.

That's when it happened. I just crashed my mouth against his. My lips pressed on his but after a few seconds, my body relaxed a bit and so did my lips. I closed my eyes and pulled away slowly, feeling extremely stupid.

"Why did you do that?" he asked as I opened my eyes again. My gaze softened despite myself when it met his and he shook his head a bit.

"I don't know." I admitted in a whisper. "It's the first thing that came to my mind."

"Do it again."

"What?" I breathed out, my eyes getting bigger.

"Do it again." he repeated just as low. "Please."

My lips parted and I started panting as my heart thumped hard in my chest, so hard that I felt like it wanted to escape. I moved closer again, tilting my head slightly and brushing my lips against his. Every single time I felt Niall's lips against mine, it was driving me insane, and now that we were both not only drunk but also in a crisis situation, I felt every single pore of my skin shaking. His lips were warm and wet and I kissed him a bit harder. I don't know what suddenly got into me but quickly, my lips parted his and I made the kiss grow deeper. I thought it would surprise him as much as it surprised me but it took only half a second for his arms to wrap around me before he pulled me closer. I moved my knees on each side of him as I felt his fingers sink in the skin of my back through my clothes. He tasted amazing and I let a whimper escape my lips without shame as I sat on him, grinding down against him. It made me feel so dizzy I started seeing yellow spots behind my eyelids and I knew it was not the alcohol this time. It was him. It was always him.

I slid my fingers in his hair just as one of his hands reached for the bottom of my shirt, slipping under it and reaching for my breast. My lips parted again and I whispered a low 'Oh my god' as I pressed my legs more on the sides of his thighs. His fingers grabbed one cup of my bra and pulled it down a bit. I felt his knuckles rub against my nipple and I kissed him again hard, shutting my eyes tight and barely controlling my own body anymore. I could feel my inner thighs throb even harder and I pressed myself on him again, feeling his cock swell between my legs.

That was not what I had expected at all but I didn't want to stop. It's only when I heard him whisper my name as his free hand traveled down my back to reach my ass that I snapped out of it. I moved away slowly, my lips still parted as i panted, and waited for him to open his eyes. We stared at each other and I finally licked my lips as he leaned his head back on the wall, his eyes never leaving mine.

"I'm sorry." I murmured. "It probably didn't help you much."

He chuckled and his lips curled enough to show me his teeth as he shook his head slightly. "Actually, it did."

"Really?"

"Devie, it's hard to think about being locked in a confined place when your dick is hard."

I pressed my lips together, trying not to laugh too, and his hand slipped out of my shirt to fall on my thigh. That position, I had dreamed of it since the first day I met Niall, and I didn't want to move away. He let his fingers trace a few shapes on my jeans and my eyes fluttered at how soft he was being with me. He brought his free hand and moved a lock of my hair behind my ear before letting one of his fingertips brush against my jaw and down my neck before sliding between my breasts. His hand finally reached for my other thigh and he squeezed both at the same time.

I couldn't pretend my inner thighs weren't throbbing anymore, but somehow, it was for an other reason. I had never been excited like that by someone being so soft and gentle with me but it made me want to kiss him again.

"Thank you." he whispered as one of his hands left my thigh to move behind my head.

He pushed me gently to him and I let him. There was nothing I wanted more than to kiss him again and when my face got close enough to his, he kissed me softly and slowly a few times. I tried to remain motionless and eyes closed, focusing on the way his warm lips peppered tender kisses on my mouth as his fingers played in my hair. It was an incredible contrast with the last kiss we just had but I enjoyed it just as much.

"Niall, why do you-"

I was cut by the sound of his phone and he sighed as I moved back to give him space. He grabbed his phone on the floor and checked the message he had just received before looked back in my eyes.

"They'll put back the power any minute now."

As if on cue, the lights changed and the power came back. I remained sitting on him as the elevator brought us to the main floor and felt my heart sink in my chest. The moment was almost over and all that would be left of it would be the memory playing over and over in my head probably forever.

"Come on, Devie." he said in a low tone. "Let's get some fresh air okay? I really need it."

I nodded and got up in silence, holding out my hand to him to help him up too. He rubbed his sweaty hands on his jeans and we got out. It was still warm outside despite that time of the year and we started walking in silence. I kept glancing at him as we wandered around the streets and he was focusing on his feet, his hands in his pockets.

"Are you ever gonna share your story with me?"

Hearing his voice again made my heart jump in my chest. "My story?"

"Yes, You know about the girl who broke my heart, partly because of Louis." he explained, turning to look at me for a few seconds. "But you never told me who broke your heart."

I brought my arms around myself as a shiver crossed my back. I hadn't shared that with anyone but somehow, I wanted to share it with Niall. It's not that I felt like I owed him, it's just that if anyone could understand what it felt to be betrayed, it was him.

"When I started my second year at my old college, I met this guy... he was my professor and he was everything anyone could wish for. He was hot, smart and funny. Everyone was in love with him and I was head over heels." I scoffed and rolled my eyes at the thought. "He showed interest in me and I.. I couldn't  believe it, you know? With all the gorgeous, perfectly-shaped and sexy girls in that school, he still had picked me."

I could feel Niall's eyes on me and he started walking slower. I followed his pace and breathed in before sighing.

"So we started seeing each other in secret. I was.. in heaven. I thought it was real, you know? I thought we had something great, something epic. And someone caught us. So he denied me. He denied our story, and he broke my heart. I changed school because everyone knew, everyone talked behind my back, everyone pointed their fingers at me and whispered when I walked by. The person who caught us literally told everyone."

"That's shitty of them."

"It was my best friend." I admitted, raising my eyebrows and sighing.

"Ouch."

"Mmhm."

"So you really loved him? Your teacher?" Niall asked after he stopped walking and turned to face me.

I realized we were back in front of Lewis' apartment building and I swallowed hard. "Yes. But I was just one of the girls he slept with. Found out the hard way."

Niall took a step closer and I tilted my chin up to keep my eyes locked with his. Once again, he moved a lock of my hair behind my ear as one of his fell on his forehead. "He didn't deserve you."

"Just like your ex girlfriend didn't deserve you."

His lips curled slightly on the right in a mix of melancholy and softness and he finally sighed.

"Come on, Devie, let's go get a rest. We're both too drunk to drive and I'm exhausted."

[writingwithadinosaur]

“Under the Knife” - Part 6

“Under the Knife” - Part 6

My Masterlist - Here

Story Masterlist - Here

My Tag List - Here

Hannibal Lecter x Reader, Will Graham x Sister!Reader

Word Count: 3,500-ish

Key: Chunks of text in italics are (Y/N)’s thoughts. Y/N = Your Name, H/C = Your Hair Color, E/C = Your Eye Color

Warnings: Cursing, Mentions of Death, Murder, and Violence

Summary: You are Will Graham’s sister who works with him at the FBI. When you get offered a job promotion, life starts to change. Some changes for the better; Some for the worst.

Author’s Note: This is my first Hannibal piece and I am proud of it. There aren’t too many stories for Hannibal, so I figured I would add to the collection.

This does take place in some happy medium where they are all alive and work together. Sort of a happier season 1 era.

This is beta-read by @theeactress​, but please let me know if there is something that we missed or that we should look at again! 

If you would like to be tagged in any of my future pieces, check out my tag list above and let me know! And as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!

<3

- DreaSaurusREX

Tag List: 

@fruitloopzzz​ @theeactress​ @melconnor2007 @ashenfallsof @geeksareunique​ @all-by-myself98​ @sj-thefan​ @fuck-your-bad-vibes-dude​ @ntlmundy​ @a-person-unlabled

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The last few days were weird for you. While working the Virginia Scalpel case, you still had to give lectures and work the occasional museum shift. Luckily you were able to give more and more of your museum shifts to your coworkers, saying that you needed the time to focus on the case or to finalize your lecture outlines. 

Between two lectures and a museum shift, you were able to narrow down your suspect list even more. Pulling every male doctor within a 50-mile radius who fit the height range and who wasn’t super young, old, or generally weak looking. You dropped it off to Jack’s office while he was in a meeting of some sort, thankful that you wouldn’t have to talk to him just yet.

After that night at the Pencalt crime scene, things seemed to take more energy than you expected. You could get up and function through your work day, but when it came to socializing or even having to have work related conversations, you found yourself doing them through email or not at all. This included talking to Hannibal or Will.

Both of them had tried calling or texting you, and you’d try to respond with a “Can’t talk right now,” or an “I’m busy.” But sometimes you didn’t have the energy and straight up ignored them. 

You knew what they wanted to talk about. And you had to admit that after letting it settle in your brain, you wanted to too. But you knew that that conversation would be a long one that required patience.

Which is why you decided to call in sick and work from home today. You weren’t scheduled a lecture or a museum shift, and everything you planned on doing in your office could be done at home. 

You understood the urgency of this case. The team only had about a week left to catch this guy before another doctor would be found in pieces. But you weren’t the only one working this case, and you were still waiting on results from Beverly, Price, and Zeller. So you justified taking today a bit slower and tried to fit in some breaks for self-care as you worked.

The day started out with a peaceful breakfast, something you hadn’t had since before you joined Jack’s team. It was different and odd feeling now, but you tried your best to enjoy it and let your mind relax. After you put your stuff in the dishwasher, you sat down where your work stuff was set up at your dining room table, and felt your mind wander.

I know I should talk to Will or Hannibal, but that would be so draining right now. No. Just focus on breathing and getting as much as you can done today, alright, (Y/N)? We don’t need you combusting over personal shit while your killer is still out there. Now, what haven’t we gone over yet?

You started to sift through some of your scribbles as a piece of paper slid out of place from within your notebook. You slightly tilted your head and pulled the paper out, seeing that webname that you had learned to hate.

“Tattle Crime”

You were going to shove the article back into your book, but you knew that your curiosity would only grow the longer you didn’t read it. With a disapproving sigh, you went ahead and read the article. 

Freddie Lounds didn’t spend much time talking about the killer. She states that Dr. Pencalt was found like the other victims, and how he was a doctor with no obvious correlation to the others. Her “article” tends to focus more on you, Hannibal, and Will. 

“Much like her brother Will Graham, who we have talked about before, (Y/N) supposedly has a gift for the psychologically strange and unusual. But we have to wonder why he isn’t working this case? Will Graham has successfully assisted Jack Crawford and his team on multiple cases in the past. So why bring on a rookie when you have a prized horse in the stables?

Maybe that is why Crawford decided to bring in Dr. Lecter, who was also an integral role in some of the cases that Will Graham had worked on. He has years of medical knowledge outside the realm of psychology that could be helpful in this case, considering the Virginia Scalpel is suspected to have a medical background.. Maybe he will be the key to locking the Virginia Scalpel up for good?”

She then went on to talk more about Hannibal before bringing up the case again. You couldn’t even fully grasp at what you were reading or how to feel about any of it before your phone rang beside you, bringing you back to reality. Only, you didn’t really want to deal with reality when you saw that the caller ID said “Jack Crawford.”

“(Y/N) here.” You tried your best to not sound unenthused, but you couldn’t help the obvious apathy in your voice.

“How soon can you get here?” You knew that this would end with you coming into the office for who knows how long, so you begrudgingly stood up and started to try to find a comfy but work appropriate outfit to change into while talking to Crawford.

“I mean… An hour? Maybe? Give or take 10 minutes. Why? What happened?”

“Got that evidence you were waiting for.” You couldn’t discern if he was at all happy about that.

Of course the one day I try to take it easy is the day we get results. You took a deep breath in and tried to form a coherent sentence.

“I--Uh… Okay. I’ll try to--”

“I’ll see you in the lab in an hour.” Jack interrupted and then hung up before you could say much else, knowing that that was an order, not a suggestion. You put your phone down and groaned before starting to get dressed.

~~~~~~~~

Pulling into your normal parking spot, you saw that you had made it to the office with 15 minutes to spare thanks to you not having the energy to do your hair or makeup today. 

You got to your office and left the door open, knowing you would only be there for a minute or two. While you unpacked your bag, you heard someone clear their throat from your doorway. Turning around, you saw Will standing in the threshold with two cups of coffee. 

“Look what the cat dragged in.” He tried to joke, but you just shot him a look. He winced and extended one of the cups out to you. “Peace offering?”

You sigh and accept the cup, not sure of what to say other than a quick “thanks.” Will stood there while you took a sip and continued to set up your stuff.

“You haven’t answered any of my texts.”

“I’ve been busy. And I’m still quite busy. I have to go and meet with everyone in,” you look at the clock on the wall. “5 minutes.”

“Jack’s really got his hooks in you, huh?” 

 “I tried to take a sick day and work from home, but lab results are in. Which means I’m also in.”

“Sick Day? You never use sick days.”

“First time for everything, I guess.” You turn around and try to walk past him but he stops you.

“(Y/N), I-” 

“I really don’t want to talk. At least not right now. You and Hannibal are on thin ice right now. And there are more important a-and time sensitive things that need to be taken care of.”

“Look, (Y/N), I can explain--”

“Explain what exactly? That you really didn’t trust me when I said that I could handle myself? That you really think I am going to let Jack push me so much during my first real case that you had to have Hannibal step in as some sort of watchdog? I know you’ve had bad experiences with Jack, but goddamnit can’t you just let me learn and experience whatever happens on my own?”

“You’re upset--”

“No shit, Sherlock.” 

“And I-I get that, but just--”

“No. I have a job to do.”

“Then come by the house later. Have a drink, o-or we can get takeout, and I can tell you my side of the story.”

You paused as you looked down slightly and started to fidget with your ring. Will is looking in your general direction, trying to figure out how to ease the anxiety that was surely coursing through your amygdala and hippocampus, or at least some of the resentment that had fought its way through your eyes.

“Even if you don’t want to talk and we end up just sitting around, I’m sure the dogs would like to see their favorite aunt.”

“I’m their only aunt.” You both smiled at the joke. His smile was more out of relief while yours was just a quick smirk. His fades quickly as you rub your face and sigh out, “We’ll see. I have no idea what’s waiting for me in the lab. So I can’t promise anything. And as upset as I am with you, I do miss those dogs.”

“Just let me know when you decide and we will make time for it.”

You just nod and he lets you walk past. Will follows you out and closes the door behind the two of you. Before you could hit the elevator button, he spoke out to you. 

“Despite what you think, I do care about you, you know.” 

You stop in your tracks and turn around to face him. You could see the pain on his face even though you know he was trying to hide it. Your heart broke as you took a large inhale.

“I know you do. We’re family. We’ll always care about each other no matter what.” You give him a small smile to try to reassure him that what you were saying was true. He nodded and headed back towards the lecture halls and you hit the button to call the elevator, preparing yourself for as much insanity as you could.

~~~~~~~~

“(Y/N), right on time” Jack announced as you walked into the lab. Everyone was there and ready to go, including Hannibal who was on the other side of the table facing you. You hoped that he wouldn’t put together how off you were feeling today from your rushed appearance.

“Sorry, I would have been here sooner, but I had a run-in with my brother. What’ve I missed so far?” You opened up your notebook and joined the circle around the exam table that had Dr. Pencalt’s body on it. You internally winced as you realized that Hannibal was most likely going to ask you about your ‘run-in’ with Will after this meeting. 

“Nothing yet. We were just about to start.” Zeller spoke up as he clapped his hands together and began his presentation. A lot of it was information that was similar to the previous victims. All of the cuts were made with surgical tools to ensure clean cuts, no obvious mutilations outside the killer’s usual, all focus was on the doctor as opposed to his wife, and so on.

“The paralytic that was used on Dr. Pencalt was the same as the other vics. It was a high enough dosage that he felt the effects within a minute or two.”

“Do you have the location and angle on the injection point?” Zeller nodded and handed you a printout that had various information about the small needle mark: diameter, insertion angle, depth, et cetera. 

“He was pricked right here.” He used a gloved hand to turn Dr. Pencalt’s head and point to a small dot on the side of his neck. You just nodded and tried to imagine the killer coming and attacking him. You were starting to solidify the height range of your suspect.

“The angle is pretty flat, which means our suspect is either the same height as him or maybe an inch taller or shorter. How tall was Dr. Pencalt?” You heard Jimmy open a file and hum a note as he found out.

“5 foot 11.” You nodded and saw the height range of the shadowy silhouette of the killer in your mind narrow.

“So our killer is between 5’10” and 6’.”

“Is that all?” Jack asked in an audibly annoyed voice. You weren’t sure if it was directed at you specifically or at the situation in general. Jimmy, Brian, and Beverly all looked at each other as if they were kids who had broken an expensive vase and had to tell dad. Beverly was the brave kid that stepped forward.

“No. There is one more thing.” She turned around and got a tray from the other side of the room, bringing it back to the circle. “This was found lodged in his throat.”

On the tray, there was a distorted but still legible article from TattleCrime.com, the same article that was in your apartment. The only major difference was that this one was highlighted wherever it mentioned Hannibal or you. 

“We tried to pull any sort of prints or DNA off of it, but the only thing we got was Dr. Pencalt’s blood and saliva. The article is from our favorite tabloid, Tattle Crime. It’s about the case, but it also talks about (Y/N) and Hannibal...”

You tried to control your breathing as Beverly kept speaking, forcing yourself to take slightly deeper breaths than normal hoping no one would pick up on it as you finally spoke up.

“So, fun story…” Everyone’s eyes landed on you. “I have that same article printed out, but I didn’t print it. Someone slipped it under my door the other night.”

You saw Jack readjust his stance, a frustrated look growing in his eyes, and started to speak, but you cut him off, already knowing where this was going. 

“I didn’t bring it up because I honestly thought Hannibal or Will had slid it into my apartment as a way to try to scare me and make me resign from the case. For personal reasons, I have avoided talking to either of them unless it was absolutely necessary. So I never confirmed my theory.” 

You couldn’t bring yourself to look at Hannibal or Jack. But if you had, you would have seen the small bit of guilt in Hannibal’s face. He knew no one else would pick up on it because he was a master at keeping his mask on to others, but after being with him as long as you had, you could see between the cracks. 

Jack looked towards Hannibal.

“Dr. Lecter, did you send the article to (Y/N)?”

“I did not. I’m just as taken aback as everyone else here.” 

“And did you receive a copy of this article at any point during the last week?”

“No. I have not read anything from Miss Lound’s website for a significant amount of time now.” Jack took a breath in and tried to be logical and figure out what the next step needed to be.

“Alright, you guys get me a list of every medical facility that supplies that paralytic. (Y/N), get your copy and give it to Price to see if he can get anything off of it. Then I want you and Dr. Lecter in my office.” Jack walked out before anyone could say anything.

You stood there in a bit of shock as you looked at the soiled article in front of you. You tried to read through the bits of blurred text. Everything involving you or Hannibal was doused in bright yellow marker. 

“Um… (Y/N)?” You couldn’t help the small instinctual jump as Jimmy tapped your shoulder. You quickly looked to him, trying to look okay despite learning that your name was literally in a key piece of evidence. “You okay?”

“Hm? Y-yeah! I mean, not really, but we’re not gonna talk about that right now.” You let out a forced exhale that you tried to make sound like a chuckle through a very forced smile. Before Price could ask anything else, you spoke up. “Here. It-its right here.”

“And you were the only one to touch this, right?” Price asked as he carefully grabbed the corners of your Tattle Crime article with clean and gloved hands. You just nodded in response. “I’ll let you know if I find anything.” 

You mutter a quick thank you and then make your way back to the elevator and back to your office to write out your notes on the killer’s more specific height range and the highlighted sections of the article in your notebook. 

Why us? I can somewhat understand Hannibal being chosen from an occupational standpoint. He is not only a psychiatrist, but he used to be a surgeon. But he has no ties to any of these other doctors. And what’s so special about me? I’m not a doctor of any kind. I don’t fit the killer’s m.o.

Your mind kept going on this internal monologue, trying to find any solid reasoning as to why both of you are now being focused on. It got even more frantic as you realized you only had about a week to figure it all out. 

Before you could write out much, you heard a soft knock on your open office door. You didn’t even bother looking up.

“Will, I really can’t do this right now. I told you I would text you when-- Oh. Sorry, Dr. Lecter.” You expected Will to be impatient and try to talk to you again, but instead you were met with the careful gaze of Hannibal. 

“No need to apologize.” He shut the door behind him and took a seat. “I thought you were comfortable with addressing me by my first name, (Y/N). Has that changed?”

“Look, I know you’re not really here to talk about that. But I’m not okay enough to talk about our personal lives at the moment. And if you’re here to ask about the Tattle Crime shit, I have no idea how--”

“I came to check up on you because I am worried about you, (Y/N).” You were taken aback for a moment. Not only does Hannibal usually never interrupt you when speaking, but he isn't always the most forthcoming when talking about emotions or concern.

“I’m fine.” You go back to trying to write out your ideas, knowing that if you gave him a fake smile, Hannibal would see right through it.

“The fact that you clearly stated that you were ‘not okay enough to talk about our personal lives’ and that you planned on taking a sick day today says otherwise.” 

You took a deep inhale and closed your notebook. Trying to not dump all of your thoughts, work related or personal, on him.

“It wasn’t really a sick day. It was supposed to be a day where I worked from home to try to remind myself to take a break and eat an actual meal, or do my laundry that’s been piling up, or maybe finally hang up that frame I bought three weeks ago. But apparently that wasn’t in my cards today. Yes, I’m tired. Yes, I don’t want to be around people right now. Yes, I really don’t want to be talking to you or Will about anything other than work right now. So if I need to be here, then I’m here. That’s my job.”

“But no matter how stressful a job is, you need to be able to recalibrate your mind so as to not overwork yourself until you become a hindrance. Holding on to the frustration and betrayal that you feel are surely contributing to that lack of ability to rest, (Y/N). If you allow yourself to talk to Will about it, or even myself if you feel more comfortable--”

“All of my focus is trying to go to this case, moreso now that you and I may be targets. I am your colleague and your friend. But I really don’t want to ruin the good relationship that we have by talking to you like I’m one of your patients, because I’m not one of your patients. So please, just--” 

You stopped yourself as you felt something click into place. Hannibal watched as you had a similar look in your eyes like how he had witnessed at the Pencalt crime scene. 

“Patient…” You were slowly closing your mind’s eye and seeing things clearly.

“You’ve figured something out, haven’t you?” Hannibal leaned forward in his seat in curiosity, truly enthralled by watching how your brain worked in these situations.

“A patient! The killer is a patient! Oh my god! We gotta go now!” You quickly stood up, grabbing your notebook as you did. “I think I just figured out who our killer is!”

[theolddarkmachine]

Imaginary - Chapter Seventeen

Midoriya Izuku’s life was turned upside by fate.

Eri’s life was turned upside down by circumstance.

And Bakugou Katsuki is about to learn that even imaginary friends need to grow up.

Chapter 17 of 19

Also on AO3

A/N: It’s another kinda shorter one but FAO;IJSELDFJ DOST MINE EYES SPOT THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL? After this, only one chapter and an epilogue left! also, fun fact, tsuru was my grandma’s maiden name!

***********************

The sun is bright and warm, heating Katsuki’s skin as he lets his feet carry him along the sidewalk. He’s distantly aware of the continuous chatter beside him as his latest assignment goes over the tactics of their most recent game of capture the flag with the other neighborhood kids at the park.

Tsuru Yuji, age 6.

Target of schoolyard bullies.

Colorful personality trapped behind a stoic, quiet demeanor.

In the beginning, Katsuki had thought that he’d be a bit of a tougher case, one that would keep his mind from tracking back to the house just two streets over with the girl with the happy smile, and the man with the all too bright eyes.

But things never went the way he wanted them to, apparently, since it had only taken a matter of days to break Yuji from his shell, and just a couple of weeks for the change to completely turn his school life around. Now Yuji had friends, and the inability to stop talking.

“Mr. Bakugou?” His name shattered his reverie, pulling his attention down to the kid at his side. The sunlight glinted off of Yuji’s too big glasses, blinding him momentarily.

“How many times do I have to tell you to drop the ‘mister,’ kid?” Katsuki gruffs without any heat as he returns his gaze back to the pavement stretched before them.

Yuji’s reply comes in the form of a high pitched giggle before he continues on about how next time, they should make the top of the slide their home base.

“Then, we could just slide down if we need to get away fast!” He exclaims, hands shooting upward as if the revelation is groundbreaking. And maybe it is.

Who was Katsuki to say for sure?

“You’re too damn smart, kid,” he replies with a halfhearted laugh of his own as he keeps his eyes trained forward.

The first time they’d taken this route back to Yuji’s house, he had told himself it was a mere accident. His feet had grown so used to this street that they’d automatically made their way here before he could even acknowledge the direction they had gone.

Not that it had mattered, as he had told himself, as he’d stolen a quick glance at the Midoriya household just days after he’d left it for the final time. While a bit out of the way, this path still technically did lead to Yuji’s house.

The second time they’d taken it, Katsuki had told himself a bit more walking was good for them both. Nothing wrong with a bit more exercise and all that.

Now, a month later, he had run out of excuses to tell himself.

It had broken just about every big rule in the imaginary friend handbook, but he couldn’t stop himself from trying to catch just one more glimpse of the pair that had worked their way so far under his skin.

When he had left the Midoriya household for the final time, he had left a bit of himself behind. The gaping open maw of his chest had been exposed and raw, leaving him filled with a painful ache unlike anything he had ever felt. Katuski had felt loss in the past, but this had been wholly different, and in those first few days, he had wondered if he might never be whole again.

It was a dramatic thought, of course. One he had to swallow down like a bitter pill as he’d taken on his next assignment.

The ache remained, it had just numbed enough for him to be able to finally breathe again.

But that didn’t stop him from walking by their home whenever the opportunity presented itself.

Just to be sure things were still okay.

At least, that’s what he told himself.

Gaze still ahead, and Yuji’s droning voice filling his ear, Katsuki feels his heart stutter at the sight of movement in the Midoriya’s yard.

The honey colored sunlight twists in Eri’s hair, making it shine bright as she cheers happily at something Izuku says. She looks absolutely elated as she crawls her way up into the car and waits for her dad to get her buckled in. When Izuku closes the door, and turns to walk around the back, Katsuki can see the wide smile that’s still stretched across his lips.

They look so happy, he thinks, and something about that knowledge fills his lungs with acid.

Katsuki watches as Izuku makes his way around the vehicle, his wide frame pausing at the driver’s side as he looked out toward the street.

For just one fleeting moment, Katsuki feels his breath stall in his chest as that familiar green stare passes over him. It’s gone almost as quickly as it has come, but it still leaves his heart racing as he watches Izuku climb into the car.

“Mr. Bakugou!” Yuji’s voice is indignant as he calls his attention back to him. Snapping his gaze away from the car as it backs out of the driveway, Katsuki hums.

“Yeah, yeah, kid,” he says, trying to ignore the strain that leaves him sounding breathless. “I’m listening.”

***

Katsuki was fucking angry.

And tired.

So goddamn tired.

Tired of the pitying looks his friends shot him when they thought he wasn’t looking. Tired of feeling like hole had been punched through his fucking chest. Tired of the emerald colored dreams that haunted him.

And especially tired of being summoned to the fucking Administrator’s office.

He’d woken that morning to the text that had the audacity to proclaim a meeting time for just an hour from then, and he already knew what it meant. Time to move on. Because it was always fucking time to move on.

Katuski would never be able to stay in one place for long, never allowed to be something permanent.

And that pissed him off.

His angry steps punctuated the otherwise quiet of the lobby, making the poor sap manning the front desk jump as they looked up from their coffee towards him.

“Mr. Bak—” they start to say, eyes going wide as he growls.

“Don’t call me that,” Katsuki hisses before he throws open the doors. The loud crack of the wood against the walls cut through the air in a dramatic way that would normally fill him with some sort of thrill. Now, it just settles somewhere in the vast expanse that sits at the center of his chest, lost to the empty feeling that’s slowly expanding.

“Lively as ever this morning, young Bakugou,” the Administrator says, not bothering to look up from the folder he’s holding open before him.

The sight of the unassuming tan of the file only serves to push the burning fury through him faster as he lets the doors fall shut behind him with another loud crash. It feels as if the air in the room is sucked out by the bone shaking sound as Katsuki fixes his fiery stare on Toshinori.

“Cut to the chase, old man,” he snarls, mouth twisting into a sneer that’s full of teeth and sharp rage.

A soft sigh brushes through the space as he watches the Administrator close the folder before gently pushing it toward the edge of the desk.

“Please take a seat,” Toshinori offers, keeping his attention forward.

“I’d rather just get this over with,” Katsuki bites out in return.

There’s another weighted pause before Toshinori sits back, his gaze finally finding Katsuki’s as it flashes with the steely silence of a command. For all the kindness and fun loving nature that encapsulated the Administrator, he had almost forgotten that he was the leader of the Imaginary Friends fo a reason.

Swallowing the sharp taste of his pride, Katsuki walks to the bean bag chair, falling into it with a muted thud.

“Talk,” Katsuki snaps, whittling the single word down to a barely there syllable as he keeps his gaze trained on Toshinori’s. His stubborn defiance is the only reason he catches the shift in the Administrator’s stare as it sweeps over him. Softening into something fond, and almost sad, it cools the inferno tearing through his veins, if only for just a moment.

“Have I ever told you about my predecessor?” He asks, solemn and far off, as if lost to the track of time.

“You brought me here for a fucking history lesson?” Katsuki growls, hands curling into tight fists where they sit on his knees. Toshinori’s eyebrow raises in silent admonishment. It forces a low string of grumbles from his mouth as he folds his arms across his chest and slips lower into the bean bag.

“His name was Banjo Daigoro, and he was a great Administrator,” he sighs at the memory. “But I was never his first choice for successor.”

A spark of interest lights the cavern of his insides as he cocks his head to the side.

“Originally, he had chosen one of my closest friends,” the Administrator continues before taking a steadying breath.

“Shimura Nana.”

The name rocks through Katsuki, sending a chill rocketing down his spine as his mind spins around the words that had encapsulate Shimura Nana’s terminated friendship.

“She was in training to take over the position, but was still going out into the field. Loved working with kids, you know?” He says, a small chuckle weaving between his words as his gaze goes distant at the memory.

“Banjo had assigned her a final case before she was going to be officially promoted. But then, she was seen.”

Shimura Nana reports child caretaker made verbal acknowledgement of her presence.

Katsuki remembered. She had only been with her charge for a week before it had happened.

And then—

Friendship terminated.

“Torino Sorahiko,” Toshinori rattles off, voice void of inflection as he recites what was written in the file word for word, as if it laid there before him.

“Lost both his parents. Was showing aggression towards his uncle, who had taken him in. He was a good kid, Nana was adamant about that. Then one day, his uncle saw her, and spoke to her.”

The blue of his eyes goes perfectly clear, settling into a cutting blue as his gaze returns to the present. Finding Katsuki once more, they whittle away at him until he’s flayed open, raw and exposed beneath the Administrator’s stare.

The feeling of being seen clings to him like a premonition. It’s equal parts awe and terror as it works its way through him.

Swallowing thickly, Katsuki speaks.

“What happened?”

But he knows. Has known for far too long.

Friendship terminated.

“We aren’t exactly supposed to be seen by anyone other than our charge, especially not by their parents or caretakers, as you know,” Toshinori says, pausing long enough to arch a brow at him before continuing.

“And Nana knew that too. Probably better than most, given the position she was going to take.”

He pauses again as his lips quirk sharply upward with bygone amusement and his voice falls into a hush, carried by the weight of his memory’s past.

“Funny thing is, that didn’t change anything. Even knowing hadn’t been enough.”

Katsuki’s breath catches deep in his throat and threatening to choke him as Toshinori speaks.

“Officially, they terminated the friendship. If you found Torino’s file right now, it would say as much. But Nana had returned after that, and they could still see her.”

Silence settles between them as Katsuki notices the way Toshinori’s eyes shine wetly.

“So, she made a choice,” he finally concludes with a shrug, as if what he had just said was nothing. As if he had just been talking about the weather. Katsuki might have even found it funny, how mundane he had made it, if it wasn’t for the fact that every single one of the Administrator’s words had been shrapnel that had torn him apart.

“What did she choose?” He hears himself ask, voice twisted into something even he doesn’t recognize. It hurts, the way it scrapes itself through his throat, and he could swear he tastes blood at the back of his tongue.

And yet for all the ways Katsuki ached, Toshinori just looks him over before fixing him with an all knowing smile.

Slowly, he reaches across the desk and pushes the folder closer towards him.

“It’s time to move on, young Bakugou,” he says by way of answer. The statement rings with a finality, one that doesn’t allow for argument or further discussion.

Sighing loudly, Katsuki grabs the folder, defeat hanging heavy across his shoulders in a way that makes him think he might find himself crushed into the ground with it.

Maybe that would be better, anyway, he thinks as he flips it open. With his eyes fixed down at the file, Katsuki feels his heart rate spike as it ratchets inside the cage of his chest.

“What is this?” He asks, not looking up. His pulse is deafening as it beats its soaring rhythm in his ears as his eyes trace back and forth across the folder, as if he’s missing something.

Except he knows he isn’t.

What could he possibly miss when the file itself is empty?

Katsuki’s tongue sticks to the roof of his mouth as he finally shifts his attention upward. His confusion is met with another smile.

“Even imaginary friends need to grow up,” the Administrator says. The words circle around him, overlaid with the memory from months ago, when he’d been in this same spot, only the folder before him then had held information about a little girl and her dad.

Then, he hadn’t known his life was about to change.

Now, he feels the sudden click of a realization deep in his chest as his gaze falls back down on the empty folder in his lap.

A rush works through him, filling the chasm at the center of his chest as his lips slowly turn up into a smile.

************************

[musedblues]

Born To Love You [Part: 6]

summary: When Gwilym ropes you into a lie, the truth becomes painfully obvious. When Joe makes things harder, there’s no telling if he even has a clue.

a/n: Well, this one is a dozy. There's plenty of angst, a dash of sickeningly sweet fluff and vague mentions of sex, but blink and you'll miss it. (Just be mindful!) After this... is just the epilogue! I cross my heart to get that bit out soon. I'm sorry for leaving you lot on a cliffhanger for so long! But I'm so so grateful for all your sweet feedback and kind lovely words. I'll really be looking forward to everyone's thoughts on this second to last chapter! 💖

w/c: 9k

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

You couldn't wait to get home. You couldn't wait to toss your suitcase full of laundry in the wash room and face plant into your familiar bed. But when you got there, and your bags were stored away and your favorite sheets beckoned you to bed, you still felt like shit.

What's worse, was the quiet. James and Andy had gone off to tend to renovations in their new home, during the weekend you settled back into the flat you'd shared with the two for years and years. So you sat alone, adjusting to the new normal. Adjusting to the hollow void where your heart should be and the echoes of it's once fierce beat surging through your ears loud enough to keep you awake.

And when Gwilym rang to hold one-sided conversations with his daughter and ask how you were, you didn't even pretend to smile. He hated to see it. But a small part of Gwilym's soul settled slightly, to see you'd dropped the act of fake grins and scripted answers. And because he sort of figured you'd hang up on him if he brought it up, and you sat on the edge of your seat every time he rang, you never spoke about what happened. Not until James and Andy came home.

///

"My dear, it's been ages!" Andy beamed, tossing his bag to the sofa and taking giant strides to wrap his arms around you. His jubilant smile was a lovely sight to see, it was hardly rimmed with the question you knew must have been on the tip of his tongue. Because Andy in all his brilliant blonde wonder had remained almost entirely out of the loop. James only knew some of the bits of the story you'd stirred up over the past month. But you figured he must have told his better half what he did know. Because it was Andy who asked, after all, in the usual way any of your friends might have for a few years now.

"How was the big trip to see your lover, then?" Andy teased, just like everyone who knew you and Gwilym well enough always had, before. Only this time you had no witty come back. You had no sharp-edged jab to defend yourself. You only let your demeanor crack, at last, letting hot, humiliating tears slip down your cheeks.

His asking was the final straw, because even though you were home, nothing felt the same anymore.

"Oh way to go, Andrew." James scoffed on his hurry in the door, reaching out to grab your shoulders, pulling you in for some kind of protective hug. You heard Andy stutter out a disoriented apology.

"It's okay." You sniffled, halfway peeling yourself from James' embrace. It was your brilliant, fiery, quick witted best pal who made you pour everybody a drink and gather around the kitchen table to spew your guts; after they spent a good hour trading Olive back and forth for several dozen welcome home hugs.

Olive was fast asleep, and it was quite again, like it had been since your return. Only now instead of letting those same old thoughts echo through your head, you spewed them all, swallowing your pride with shots of whiskey. James and Andy listened all the while, taking quick drinks when you did, wincing over your pathetic, deadly details.

"Well... It's really just like that scene in My Best Friends Wedding.'" Andy mewled, trying to equate the pickle you found yourself in, to something that was fixed on a movie screen in the matter of one easy-going scene. You shook your head as James did too,

"This is clearly way more like While You Were Sleeping, except Gwil's been awake the whole time." James pointed out, getting up to reach for the bottle of alcohol on your counter.

"This is Anna Karenina." You whined gravely, letting your head drop to the table with a sorry thud. Andy gasped as James gently tugged your hair to get your attention as he said,

"Fuck that. You're getting that happy ending, love. Just give it time."

Your flatmates promised to see you through your latest greatest disaster; swearing that even after they moved away you'd still be welcome to crash in their guest room, swearing everything would be okay.

///

Halloween ended when Olive scraped her knees. She stumbled over an uprooted tree branch, scuffing up the socks you found to perfectly match her chicken costume.

You left James and Andy in their nondescript punk rock get ups and headed home with your unsettled babe for the night. You woke up early the next morning, around the same time your flat mates were creeping in from whatever party they got sucked into the whirlpool of. They told you goodnight as you totted Olive into the living room for the day. It was filling up with halfway packed moving boxes that served as reminders for you to get a move on. So while an old Julie Andrews film played, you scrolled through some listing as Olive clamored to the sofa at your side.

And right when you'd found the perfect neighborhood; A call you were anxious to answer interrupted your interest in a reasonably priced townhouse close to a quaint school district.

"You promised you'd facetime last night!" Lucy's delicate whine was music to your ears.

"I sent you a picture of Olive in her chicken costume! But we had to cut festivities short." You explained Olives tumble and apologized for missing out the chance to facetime your friend all dressed up, like you once promised through text.

"Not to mention you missed getting a glimpse of our killer halloween party, over here. I'd never seen Gwil so drunk." Lucy snorted. You chuckled too. "I wish you would have been there."

"I would have loved to see you, Luc, but I'm sure I wasn't missed by anyone else."

"I beg to differ. I wasn't the only one who was sad when you didn't call, last night. In fact, Joe said-"

"Lucy." You cautioned. Olive rested her head in your lap, and you ran your fingers through her curls in an automatic attempt to keep that familiar sickness from rising in your throat. Lucy stalled for a moment but spoke up again.

"Joe talked about you all night, actually." She seemed to realize. "To me, anyway. We sat while the others played some dumb game... and he asked about you. He had been drinking, though, and kept saying something about the aquarium?"

"I'm going to hang up if you keep-"

"Y/n..." Lucy bit for your undivided attention.

"Joe... well... you should talk to him. It would do you both some good."

"I don't think that's a good idea in the slightest. I'm not over-"

"Just... talk to him. For me?" Lucy begged, sweetly. You said okay, but not because you planned on phoning the guy, but because you were desperate for your friend to talk about anything besides Joe.

///

Gwilym came home for the holidays. You fetched him from the train station, settling into his familiar company right away. And for a week, you spent most of your time in his spacious home, baking sweets and taking naps on his big comfy sofa. You mixed drinks for the members of his massive family who stopped over, bearing gifts, and telling stories. All while Gwilym kept Olive on his hip, when she wasn't trailing behind his stride.

You spent Christmas morning the same way you had for years in a row. Only now was the last time you'd be joining James and Andy around the table for your traditional pancake breakfast. It was the last time you'd huddle around the moving box cramped living room, trading decorated parcels and reading new storybooks to Olive. You laughed the whole day, in place of crying, because you knew you would if you brought up the elephant in the room.

You couldn't tell them how much you'd miss them. How much you already did.

Your pending ex flatmates took a trip the week leading up to new years eve- filling both their cars with boxes and vowing to finish fixing up repairs to their almost home sweet home. Gwilym noted, over and over again, that you were welcome to stay with him till you found another place to settle.

You slept on the idea, in Gwilym's guest room over on New Year's Eve. The two of you were fast in bed long before the new year kicked off. You started the fresh new morning when Gwilym gently jarred you awake with a tender reminder of the promise you'd both made to Lucy.

///

James and Andy were more than happy to keep Olive for the weekend, as it was the last chance they'd get to spoil the kid for a while. They waved you off at the train station as Gwilym held out his hand for you while you climbed the narrow steps.

"I hope you know how much I really don't want to do this." You huffed, plopping into a seat facing Gwil. He grinned, peering to you past his glasses, past rays of the dull rising sun.

"I'm sorry." Gwilym nodded. You narrowed your eyes in wonder, silently prompting Gwilym to explain why he sighed so gravely.

"I'm sorry for the way I ruined things, for you. I know how much you came to care for everyone, and how you now feel like everything is destroyed. But I think you'll find your reputation isn't completely tarnished." Gwilym smiled, glancing at his feet as you bit your lip, considering his words.

"I'm not sure if that makes me feel better or worse." You let out a breathy laugh, watching the train slowly chug away from the platform. Wouldn't it be better to be excommunicated instead of tiptoeing on eggshells around people who used to consider you their unconditional friend?

"But thanks, Gwil." You quickly added, hoping he could tell you were moved by his attempt to ease your worry. You really couldn't imagine life without your unconventional friendship.

///

You tried to ignore how much more like home Gwilym's airbnb felt than your own beloved loft. You unearthed a change of clothes and left your bags in the back of his rented car. You'd be staying with Lucy this weekend, after her sister's gallery opening. You doted on your flatmate back home. And you put yourself through small hell for Gwilym. But there seemed to be a growing world of things you'd only ever dream of doing for the sake of Lucy's happiness.

You dressed for the night out, stuffing your phone and some money in the clutch Lucy gave you on the first night you met the girl. The small bag that's stitching was decorated fossilized gemstones was designed by Lucy's sister, whose gallery full of creations you were off to admire.

Gwilym filled your time with anxious chatter about what Lucy had told him to expect tonight. You couldn't tell if he was excited, or rambling to ease your clearly nervous state.

///

Lucy and Rami were waiting in the vestibule, donned respectively in black silk and pink chiffon. You didn't have time to second guess yourself before your well-dressed friends stormed your way- wrapping their arms around your shoulders and gently squealing in your ear.

"No way, I'm not even close to done yet." Rami squeezed his arms tight around you when you started to peel yourself from him. You let out a warm laugh, hugging him back all the same.

"If you must disappear for so long ever again, you've really got to do a better job of keeping in touch, you know?" Rami rang over your shoulder as you leaned into his surprisingly welcoming embrace.

Lucy yanked you from Rami's clutch and pulled you in her stride, rambing right off about how her sister had been anxious to meet you. The girls gallery was full of boldly decorated gowns, painted shoes, and upcycled handbags- true works of wearable art. Before you had time to admire any of it, Lucy pulled you straight to the back of the room, where a girl who looked very much like your friend was entertaining a group of guests sipping champagne.

Lucy introduced you to her sister, an equally elegant and bubbly girl who smiled at you with the same warmth your good friend had always shown. You proudly clutched the small purse Lucy had gifted you, flashing it out for all to see. You boasted about how you adored the thing, and how much you admired the girls creations you'd caught glimpses of on you breeze through, so far. Lucy stayed glued to your side, as if she'd never left it, bragging about her sister to the group who still listened on.

"Go one then, everyone. I'll fill more drinks while you enjoy all my hard work." The girl laughed, waving about the gallery full of eye catching instalments. Lucy took you around every corner, telling stories about the outfits you gazed upon. Some stragglers would listen on, while others shouldered past to find more drinks. One of the shoulders that brushed yours belonged to a familiar blonde. Ben turned to give a nod in your direction before scuttling off to the sound of his name being called.

You couldn't make out the look in his eye before his face turned away, and you couldn't be sure if he'd caught the look in yours. You couldn't tell if Lucy pulled you closer to distract you from it all, or if she really was as excited as she seemed to point out the display of umbrellas before you.

When Gwilym reappeared with a flute of champagne for you in clutch, you took it, and stayed near Lucy as she floated from one place to the next. Lingering too long near the father of your child felt more like a dare than ever, in such mixed company.

It was then, Joe showed up; before Lucy had floated too far. When you saw him, you pretended your breath didn't catch in a theatrical gasp. Rami pretended not to notice. And Ben swooped toward Joe, guiding him in the opposite direction with an over blown greeting, as you shooed Lucy to keep on walking.

///

Lucy set you up in her lavish guest room, made up of pastel walls, sheer curtains and cozy sheets. You dumped your bags in the corner and watched the girl primp her hair in the guest room en suite before the others arrived. Lucy was throwing some kind of after party in her sisters honor, where more trusted and true friends were meant to show up ready to mingle the night away.

"Since Sami is in town, too, Rami and I thought it was the perfect time for everyone we adore to dance the night away, together." Lucy mumbled past the bobby pins between her teeth.

Rami's brother seemed lovely, based on the short introductions you shared back at the gallery. Sami was one of the first guests to burst into Lucy's flat, balancing a few store bought desserts and asking for your help setting them across counter tops. Lucy was always looking for an excuse to gather everyone together huh? You smiled over the realization that everyone seemed to be just as eager for whatever overblown gathering the girl planned next.

Soon, the home was full of faces you'd come to recognize throughout the night. You chatted with Lucy's sister, while music kept changing genres with every new soul who was awarded control of the bluetooth.

But as drinks and hugs were passed around, you'd yet to see any of the people you'd come to know during the pantomime of a time you'd spent in London, last. Not until you floated toward the kitchen.

Ben was there, head tossed back as a swallow of whiskey disappeared down his throat. You crept in, assessing the drinks that linked the counter- more eager to extend your greetings to the blonde than you had been for whatever you'd come in here for in the first place.

"Hi Ben. You look well." You spoke, admiring his tousled hair and the fitted clothes he wore. The blonde twisted and looked right at you for the first time all night.

"Oh, thanks. I'm just so glad you're back round." He slurred in cold disdain. His tone was flat and his eyes were empty. As you registered his disposition, you recalled the look in Ben's eye every time he caught you playing house with Gwil. If anyone was fooled by your act it was Ben. He'd admired your picturesque family. You'd burned his rose-colored image to the ground.

"No, yeah I really wish you could have been round for Halloween. You could have gone as Bebe Buell. Gwil could have been Steven Tyler and Joe would have been Todd Rundgren. Hell, you wouldn't have even had to have dressed up for that role." Ben ended his tipsy address by slamming his empty glass on the counter, causing a crack to race up to the rim.  You stood there, heart shattering in place, too...

"I swear to God if you break Joe's heart I will-" Ben pointed, darkly.

"Ben, what the fuck?" Lucy cursed, spinning into the room like a hurricane. She ripped the broken glass from Ben's fist and gave him a disappointed glare.

"Apologize to her right now!" Lucy boomed. You stood stone still, watching in shock. You'd been prepared to deal with every blow Ben delt you, because that's what you deserved. You did nothing to merit Lucy's displays of friendship.

"Fuck that." Ben spat, looking right to you. "You're a fucking liar."

Rami appeared as if he was just breezing by, but grabbed Ben along the way, clasping his shoulder and dragging him out of the room. Lucy scurried over to you, while you started to apologize and plan your escape route.

"I knew I shouldn't have come, I'm sorry-"

"Yes, you told a lie. But you've apologized, and explained, and given it time. So has Gwil. It's over now. Dealt with. Ben had no excuse for losing his cool like that." The brilliant blonde petted your arm as you held fast to the anchor of regret that had found a residence in your belly.

"I hurt his feelings Luc. That's excuse enough."

"Well, I don't think so. He should apologize. He doesn't need to like what you did but you're not going anywhere. So, he'd better get used to it."

Lucy spoke decidedly, reaching for a martini glass. You smiled, and shrugged, and mouthed thank you as a few folks you didn't know pranced into the kitchen.

When you rounded the corner into the busy living room, you were halted on your mission to find a bit of quiet.

"Here, you're gonna want some of this before Gwil eats it all."

Joe was stood in front of you with a small purple plate of cake. You glanced from the buttercream and back up to the man with fossils for eyes. He was dressed in clothes you remembered him wearing before, a bit of stubble covered his jaw.

Your hand lifted to take the plate from his grasp as your eyes locked on his, too many words to choose from sticking in your throat. He started to turn back to wherever he came from, but then nodded his head for you to follow along.

"Are you kidding me? You're a shit friend." Gwilym cried from the sofa, as you approached. "After I asked you so nicely to fetch me another slice." Gwil's gaze turned from the dessert in your clutch, shaking his head in Joe’s direction.

"That was the last piece and you already had three." Joe pointed to the plate in your hand as he plopped next to Gwilym on the sofa. You eased across from the two, moving faster than you could think otherwise.

"He's always stealing Olives snacks, too." You laughed a little, hoping like mad that you didn't seem as nervous as you were. "I'll take this as pay back on her behalf." You grinned to Gwil, raising a bite of cake to your lips.

As Gwil started to defend himself, Sami breezed by, settling into the nook you'd found yourself among, it didn't take him long to learn you and Gwil were trading banter about the same little girl.

"Oh, you two are together?" Sami asked, trying to connect the dots, like so many others had before.  And in a flash, after shooting you a look, Gwilym answered.  He assured you weren't a pair. That you only stuck so close because of the kid you shared. As he rambled about Olive, you wondered why it couldn't have been that easy, every other time.

You picked sorrily at your cake, accepting the new normal. Accepting the same white noise that blasted through your ears while your throat closed around the apologies you felt you'd never say enough of. And while Gwil pulled up a few photos of your darling daughter to show Sami, you glanced up, noticing Joe turning his easy going expression toward you.

"Thanks," You decided no sooner than you started speaking. "Ya know... for not hating me."

Joe's delicate gaze turned. His brow furrowed and his smile twisted as his eyes studied your own for a bit. You turned back to your cake, eating as much as you could before the permanent sickness in your stomach was too all-consuming.

Then you got up to toss your rubbish away. You left the people you knew mixed among the strangers who didn't know enough of you to cast appropriate glares on your creep through the kitchen. As you lingered in the back of the room, Lucy's sister led a group of girls in from the cold. She warned you the fire burning on the patio was close to dying out as she guided her friends indoors. You  took it as a strange invitation to float out back to the empty ring of patio furniture. The head pounding music and bouts of laughter echoing from inside nearly became silent as you shut the door and drifted to sit on your own. This was the escape you'd been in search of earlier. But you weren't solo for long.

"You alright?" Joe's voice cut through the cold, after the storm door creaked shut behind him. You glanced up to the guy, who braced his arms at his chest, and waited to move closer until you gave the green light. You were afraid of what might happen when you answered.

"Yeah." You nodded smally, after a sigh. Joe floated toward the bench you'd sunken into, willing the cushions to swallow you whole.

"I don't know why you think I'd hate you." Joe stated, sending your mind to reel as if his daring to single you out wasn't enough of an emotional frenzy.

"You know why." You responded in an easier breath than you knew you had in you. Joe sat at your side on Lucy's posh patio furniture, while you turned your head, watching the fire die out.

"No, I don't. Even though it was all fucked up... I just... I guess I understood." Joe started, taking his time explaining things from his perspective. Explaining how he'd watched you and Gwilym fit together, and clash. How he heard some of the things you and Gwilym hissed at each other from other rooms. How you'd look at eachother with warnings. Joe said that when the truth came out, he was more relieved to know it, than offended. But you weren't totally convinced. You weren't relieved at all.

"I'm never not going to be sorry, Joe." You shrugged, casting your eyes toward him for a daring beat.

"What for?" Joe asked quietly, in a tone that suggested you didn't have a thing to be sorry for.  Your eyes turned to your lap, searching for the right way to say what you felt you needed too. After a pause that seemed like eternity, you said,

"I wanted things to be so different..."

And then Joe said,

"Yeah. Me too."

Damn it. If you'd only just done something, anything differently, back then. You'd tried taking it all back. You'd tried letting time pass. Like all the movies said to do. So why did it feel worse than ever? Why couldn't you help but to hang your head, catch your breath, and bite back tears? You prayed the moment would pass. You prayed Joe would get up and leave you to suffer, leave you to adjust to your new normal.

You wouldn't let yourself cry. Not even when you felt the weight of Joe's hand in your shoulder. You held it together still, when he gently spoke your name, a vague invitation for you to let go, but you wouldn't. Joe wrapped his arm behind you. And when he did, all your practices nearly rendered useless. But instead of crying, you sank into Joe's side and closed your eyes. He let you.

///

He walked behind as you decided to head back in. And he said goodbye soon after, leaving with a tipsy Gwilym in tow.

Rami stayed to help clean up. Then he left Lucy with a kiss goodbye, on his way to enjoy the last of his brothers company in London. The house was quiet, but still buzzing with new born memories of laughter and commotion. Lucy was tired, and so were you. It was easy to pretend that you just craved sleep, and not an entirely different set of realities. So you saved expressing your regret for the shower and vowed to enjoy the rest of the weekend with your friend; who'd been looking forward to having you over since she conceived these plans at the beginning of the end of last year.

You always figured it would be easier to ignore your feelings. To steer clear from Joe. But with the way all your mutual friends seemed to enjoy each other's company, your plans fell through. So if you had to wind up so near Joe, you figured you'd better enjoy the slightest bits of his company. Because he'd smiled so easily at you. He'd been so kind. You didn't deserve any amount of his attention, but hell, you'd take it.

///

The next day you wandered down a few streets in the surprisingly warm London air. Pepperings of snow had melted away and you could have been fooled into dressing for spring if the wind didn't pick up every now and again. But still, you strolled alongside Lucy until you reached a small bistro, where she insisted on buying your lunch. She also insisted on listening to you talk, even though you were much more anxious to hear the deadly details of her much more exciting life.

She listened to your stories about Olive and Christmas time with Gwilym. She listened to you tell how nervous you were to come back to London, ready for some reality television show level of drama to bog you down. Lucy laughed at the prospect and kept pulling her phone into view when you stopped to take sips of your drink.

You realized why she'd been so taken with texting when your date was crashed. Of course, Lucy didn't tell you she'd invited Joe along. And of course, as he joined your table, Lucy stood to leave.

"Right, I've got to meet Rami to see his brother off. I'll see you later, doll, don't have too much fun without me!" Lucy shrugged into her coat and spun around after leaving you with the gesture of a kiss.

You couldn't help but laugh as she disappeared around the corner. Joe grimaced when he discovered that you'd been left out of the loop, swearing he hadn't dreamed of catching you off guard. You decided it was the way of things, in London. Anyway the wind blows... right?

It only took you the usual dread filled second to get past your blush. To assess Joe's windblown hair and his familiar posture. And just like that, after he ordered some tea and you sent Lucy a message full of hot headed emojis to decode, you and Joe delved into one of those conversations you always had with ease. The kind where he'd tell you an exceptionally long winded story about the madness on set. One of his exaggerated quotes would remind you of something from a long past summer camp, and then you'd get to talking about growing up. One thing always led to another, until there was no topic left to turn. Until the conversation you were never sure might come to life was the only one left to have.

It was Joe, in fact, who'd brought up some stupid thing Gwilym said on one of their days off. How he'd misheard an expression and argued with Joe, and Google, slow to admit his misunderstanding.

"Sounds like Gwil." You laughed, but only a little. Only to suppress the scream in your throat. You glanced down to see if Lucy had responded to the message in your lap, but only to avoid Joe's fossilized gaze. She had. She told you she had no clue when she'd be back home and reminded you where her spare key was hidden in case you became stranded.

And when you looked back up, Joe hadn't shifted his intently watchful eye.

"You know, we really should talk."

He was right. This was always coming, somehow, someway. Even as the universe tried its darnst to prevent it, still. Lunch hour had ended, and the bistro was closing. But all the reasons you'd said no to Joe in the past didn't exist anymore. So you asked if he fancied to walk back to Lucy's, where he could leave you be after giving you an earful.

The whole way there was sprinkled with mindless chatter to fill the gaps. The calm before the storm, you decided. You found Lucy's spare key with your heart in your throat, and tried to remember all the good things you'd come to adore about Joe that might mean he'd let you down gently. But you really deserved a good talking too. A totally battering of the heart and soul.

You floated to the kitchen, rambling through the same speech you'd given Lucy hours ago, about how uncertain you'd been about showing up in London after everything. How you expected to have heard many more curses from everyone, by now. How Ben's scolding you last night was only surprising due to the fact that it was cut short.

Joe listened, shaking his head every now and again, settling into the chair nearest you as the setting sun turned the room a dark, sad blue.

"Ben will come around." Joe nodded, after you cringed at bringing up how he spoke to you in this very kitchen.

"Well I'll understand if he doesn't." You assured. You'd come here expecting to spend time with Lucy, and find some kind of closure with everyone else. Even though you didn't want to.

"He will. He cares about you, y/n. We all do. Things like that aren't so easily changed."

You couldn't help but grin as your eyes rolled. Then, with all the compassion Lucy had shown you, and all the assurance Gwil had always given, Joe spoke up. He rambled for a bit about how September seemed from his perspective. How he was more relieved, than upset, when things boiled up and over. Because then, at least he'd hoped, all the times he'd caught you and Gwilym hissing at each other from the other room, would have ended. Joe hoped, when he found out the truth, that it was as simple as it seemed.

You laughed, because his definition of simple boggled your mind a bit.

"All I'm saying is I'm glad you and Gwil cared enough about each other to pretend to care a little bit more." Joe chuckled. "It all could have been much worse, ya know?"

"You're impossibly optimistic. But I'm glad." You pursed your smile, settling deeper into your seat, feeling less like your heart might explode.

After another bout of expressing your regret, and Joe assuring you had nothing to be sorry for, everything sort of felt like it used too. Your conversation floated from one thing to the next, like it always did. You spent the entire sunset yammering with the guy you'd always been too nervous to stand just near.

"Just exactly how long are you staying?" Joe seemed to suddenly wonder, when you chatter started to dissolve.

"Only until the weekend is up. I promised Lucy..." You noted, wondering if this surprise set up was something she'd had in mind all along. You wouldn't have put it past her. "She's apparently got very big plans for us the next couple of days.""

"Right," Joe shifted, his lovely smirk deflating every so slightly. "Well then it looks like this is our only opportunity to talk like this, huh?"

You figured so, trying not to look so distraught over how badly you really didn't want to leave Joe's company. It always got better each time. It always took you by surprise and put you at ease in one go. And maybe that was because you dreaded the times he wasn't near worse than the times he was. And this was one of the last, without another to look forward too.

"So, then, can I just say something I was hoping to have much longer to think through before speaking?" He grinned, but his tone was serious- deadly. A lethal pause started to set in, Joe shifted his weight and sucked in a breath. You did too, then nodded, doing your best to brace yourself accordingly. Joe seemed to consider his thoughts for a beat longer, each silent nanosecond sending your pulse into overdrive.

"I meant what I said when we met." Joe gave one sure nod before locking his forest colored eyes onto yours. "I still do."

"You do?" You asked, not forgetting the words he chose careful after knocking into you; but not understanding that he might have held onto them all the same.

"And when I told you I wish we'd met differently... this is what I meant. This was the kind of chance I had my fingers crossed for." Joe gestured between the two of you in the dim kitchen as the light started fading below windows.

"What? To remind me of the things you said without the fear of Gwil overhearing?" You laughed a little, still too afraid there was some kind of catch. An inevitable "but" that would show up and spoil the sweetness.

"No." Joe smiled, shaking his head. "No, not just to remind you of those things." His eyes searched your face, and there was no time to save the way your stomach filled with waves that reached your heart.

"Do you realize what you're saying right now?" You asked in a nervous waver.

"Yes. Everything I never got to before... and worried I might never get too."

You kept your gaze locked on Joe as he swallowed and looked to you in a way he never had before.

"All I'm saying is that I can't imagine I'll ever feel this way about anyone else, ever. And I don't want you to leave, at least not like last time. Preferably, nothing like last time. I liked you before I even knew who you were. That minute before I knew about Gwil. And even after then, too. And just thinking about letting you get away a second time kind of makes me want to cry. I'll understand if you think I'm fucking insane from now on, but... I don't want you to go."

"Where would you rather I be?" You dared to ask in a hush. You could make out Joe's piercing hope filled expression in the dim kitchen, but you couldn't believe he was looking to you like he had all those times before, still.

"With me." Joe said.

"You can't be serious." After everything? Even now?

"I've quite literally never wanted anything more."

Then, you thought, If he let all those months go by with time enough to grow resentment toward you, he didn't. He had time to find someone much more worthy of his adoration, but he didn't. He said he wanted you, perhaps more fiercely than he had when you collided for the first time. But there had to be a catch.

"Gwil will always be around." You reasoned. He was your rock. He was every bit of parent you couldn't be on your own. You weren't about to let go of his helping hand.

"He's my best friend." Joe shrugged.

"And Olive-"

"Wouldn't have it any other way." Joe grinned. And for another while, as you pitched cons, Joe batted back pros. He reasoned with all of your outlandish what if's and put all of your thought up worries to rest.

"And what do you suppose we do now, then?" You asked, in one final attempt to find a fault in his desperation. A crack in the daydream that was seeping into real life.

"We can figure it out as we go. I waited this long without you, what's a little while longer with us finally on the same page?"

You went quiet, searching Joe's pretty, stubble covered face. You'd already made up your mind long ago, hadn't you?

"Okay. I have at least seven hundred more questions... but okay."

"Yeah?" Joe asked like he couldn't believe he'd talked you into it.

"Yeah." You sat up a little, feeling more at ease than you maybe ever had.

"Well now I really don't want you to go." Joe grinned, drawing his brows close as he realized just because you'd decided to work through things didn't mean they'd get easier in a flash.

"Then..." You decided, because you'd done more than enough procrastinating and debating, "Why don't you stay?"

Because this might be it for a while... but you were damned and determined to make it better than ever before. "I agree that we shouldn't just jump into things..." You explained, considering your mission to move house and Joe's pending trip back to the US. "But I think you'd better kiss me, now."

Joe must not have wanted to waste another second, either. He leaned in before you'd even finished speaking. But just like before, when he'd almost kissed you, he moved slow. And you felt his breath fan over your face. But instead of lunging away, Joe kept inching closer until your lips collided. And then he kissed you the way you always dreamed he would. You kissed him back with every bit of stored up feeling you could pull out in such a hurry. It was a sweet kiss. A long time coming. It was a moment you could have frozen and stayed in, content. But it grew and grew, like the unstoppable way forests take over old roads once there was nothing stopping their sprouting.

Joe reached out, his fingers disappearing into your hair as you kissed him like your life depended on it. You couldn't stop the way you were drawn to him, not anymore. It was impossible to tell who moved first; if Joe yanked you closer or if you'd flung yourself into his lap. All you knew was that's where you ended up, and where you longed to stay for the rest of time.

You were too entirely lost in the way his mouth opened against yours. All you could focus on was how he'd kept you so close when the pair of you moved from the kitchen to the guest bedroom. It was some kind of miracle your head was clear enough to lock the door after Joe kicked it shut and pushed you against it.

You'd wanted this for so long. You'd always wondered what Joe's lips might taste like every time he stretched a smile across the same room as you. You'd pushed away daydreams every time his eyes locked on yours and lingered long enough for you to get lost in.

Now you didn't have to wonder what he might whisper in your ear, or the way his fingers felt against your skin. You got to know what it was like to look in Joe's fossil eyes, before they rolled back while you settled into his lap. You got to run your fingers through his hair and take a deep breath, thinking back to all those little times you'd dared to wonder about a time like this before. You'd always been so certain and scared it wasn't in the cards. But in the span of an evening long conversation, you were sorted. How could it have been so easy? How could it be real?

"I've wanted to be with you for so long." You whispered, hoping Joe knew exactly what you meant. The way you spoke of so much in one statement. You ran a set of fingers through his copper hair, trying to ground yourself from getting lost in the worry you'd become so accustomed too.

"I'm all yours." He assured, speaking in the way he did, that used to make you wonder if his tone was just in your head. It couldn't have been the case, you realized. Not when he spoke low in your ear in the same way, now. Maybe there was lots more to figure out. But this was more than enough for now. It was enough to accept the way he wanted you. And Joe must have really wanted you by the way he'd grabbed hold of you and moved to prove it. You knew better than to take a nanosecond for granted. You knew to relish the way Joe glistened before you. You swore through your fluttering lashes you spotted a halo. Even if it was a ring of light cast from the bedside table- it fit Joe's crown well.

///

Lucy came home long after you'd fallen asleep. The beaming of her headlights through the curtains and the sound of her car door shutting and locking roused you from slumber, barely. All you registered was her homecoming, and Joe’s arms and legs tangled up with yours. The pace of his gentle breathing at your side sent you back to sleep just as peacefully.

When you woke up again, with this rising sun, Joe was still out cold. You could hear Lucy humming in the kitchen, knocking about pans like she had the morning before. So you decided to take the cue to greet the day. You scurried to the en suite, tamed your hair and waltzed out to find what your friend was cooking up.

You had half the mind to scold Lucy for abandoning you, last afternoon. But she always had a knack for gifting her friends exactly what they needed, even if they hadn't really asked, hadn't she?

"You're up early for someone who was out so late." You playfully jabbed, shuffling past Lucy whose pretty face lit up upon seeing you. She stood near the stove, fussing over pancake batter and a tin of blueberries.

You were already halfway through your mission to pour a cup of coffee from the fresh pot across the room, as Lucy greeted you warmly as ever. She rambled for a bit about taking Rami's brother to dinner when his flight got delayed. You turned from resting your piping hot mug on the table in time to notice Joe had awoken, and was leaning against the frame of the kitchen doorway.

"Pancakes? Nice." He stifled a yawn, dressed in the joggers he'd worn the day before. Lucy spun on her heels with a startled yelp at the sound of his voice over her shoulder. Her tin of blueberries went flying, and you managed to catch it before too many tumbled to the tile floor. Lucy let out a string of curses, and a few steady breaths, as Joe was quick to apologize for scaring her into making a mess, crouching to collect the few stray blueberries as you handed Lucy the tin with the smallest grin. She returned your smirk before shrugging back to the stove.

"Breakfast for three, then." She said, obviously trying to keep an excited squeal at bay.

You poured two more cups of coffee and settled in for the most important meal of the day. While you ate, Lucy sat back, demanding to know what was going on. You and Joe traded between turns explaining, telling how you'd talked through most everything last night. How you had lots left to talk about, and lots to decide. But that you'd agreed to figure it out as a pair along the way.

After you'd finished your story, and thanked her for making breakfast Lucy dramatically wiped a faux tear from her eye. She stood to collect your empty plates, and urged you to get ready. Apparently, she'd gone all out, booking a day out on the town for the two of you.

"Sorry Joseph, but I've called dibs on this cutie. You can hang around here if you'd like. I'm sure we'll be seeing lots of you this weekend either way." Lucy giggled, yanking you through the kitchen door and toward your guest room.

As you rushed to fix yourself up and finished your makeup in the spacious en suite, Joe slipped in to tell you goodbye. He collected his wallet from the bedside table while you asked what he was up to today, only a little gutted to part ways.

"I've actually got plans with Ben." Joe rose a brow, leaning against the sink as you tore your gaze from your reflection and uttered a worried "Oh."

"I'll talk to him, okay?" Joe nodded. He'd been so certain last night, that Ben would come around. You'd been accepting of the fact that might not be true, but now the same fact worried you worse than before.

"Okay." You agreed with caution, turning to evaluate your reflection once more. Then you glanced to Joe's image in the same mirror, already missing him. Already anxious about the next steps you'd decide to take together. Everything between you and Joe happened pretty quickly, after such a torturous build up. But now you were back to taking it slow. You knew that was for the best. You knew Joe was worth it.

"See ya later?" You gave a small shrug, unsure of the proper parting phrase, after the conclusions you'd come too.

"No doubt." Joe smiled, pressed a quick kiss to your hair, and spun out of the room, yelling for Lucy to come and tell him goodbye. You didn't have a reason to suppress the butterflies in your stomach as you perfected your lipstick. You simply enjoyed how light your feet felt as you glided into another bright day.

///

Lucy dragged you from shop windows, to expensive stores. She pulled you along to try free samples of sweets and insisted you try on a pair of shoes that couldn't fit her feet, or your plebeian budget.  You ordered tea and stopped in the middle of streets and markets to laugh until it hurt. When you'd wound up in the middle of a manicure with a glass of wine and a couple of nail techs who were eager to gossip with you; you had to stop from pinching yourself and messing up your fresh polish.

Lucy kept bringing up Joe, and all the times she'd caught him staring at you. All the times she thought she'd notice you stare back. She reckoned it was a good thing you'd finally found a way to go about giving each other a chance, no matter how strongly things came to be. She agreed fate was at hand. And so did you, because as you spoke so liberally of the lad, you seemed to summon a text message from him.

Joe: Ben wants you to meet up with us for dinner. He promises not to be mean anymore.

You read the message aloud to Lucy whose eyes grew wide. Your nails were dry by then, as you strolled about the city together. She insisted you skip her movie night plans, nudging you to agree and work things out with everyone's favorite stubborn blonde. You asked if she was really sure. Because you'd already missed one night of fun you could have had together. Lucy figured you could make up for it in the next night and a half you were still around, making loose plans to see each other in the near future all the same.

You admired Lucy's tenacious and tireless efforts at preserving your friendship, and agreed to see her later in the evening.

///

It was the same restaurant you'd come to that first night you met everyone. You couldn't be sure if the boys picked it on purpose, or if it was really the only nice joint open at such an hour. You glided through the doors with a keen chuckle. No matter how or why, everything seemed to come full circle. And with that you'd always be certain.

Ben and Joe were lingering near the back, at a table in the least bust section of the place. You noticed them notice you, and held your breath as your feet traveled closer. One thousand versions of the same sorry came to mind, as you felt Ben's eyes on you. The thing's he'd spat your way echoed in your head. You hated to think you hurt his feelings, broken his heart.

When you were close enough to open your mouth and say all the things Ben deserved to hear, you didn't get too. Because Ben stood up, and spoke first.

"I'm sorry." He croaked, reaching to pull you into a hug without question. You were stunned, for a second, but hugged him back tight. His jumper smelled like expensive cologne and his arms nearly squeezed your shoulders out of place. You tried to hug him back with matched intensity.

"Well, I'm still sorry too." You spoke, voice muffled by his jumper. "I did a stupid thing. One that could have been fixed a bunch of times."

You pulled away to look at the handsome guy you'd always been so humbled to call a friend.

"But you did it for Gwil." Ben nodded, giving your shoulders a final squeeze. He gestured for you to sit, and you followed his lead as Ben said something more.

"I'm not sorry for being angry. But I am sorry for how I acted and the things I said."

You shook your head, feeling the warm sting of tears press against the back of your eyes. "I deserved to hear those things. I needed someone to tell me how stupid I was being."

Ben commiserated and wrapped an arm around your shoulder as you leaned in for another hug. You'd missed his company so dearly, you missed how passionately Ben cared. He promised he'd always be around to knock some sense into your head.

"And anyway... all is well now, from what I hear?" Ben shrugged as you sniffled and cast a glare across the table to Joe, who was waggling his brow and sipping some fruity drink.

"I wish things were always this easy." You let out an airy laugh, reaching for the menu that listed the drinks.

"I'm just glad they finally are. Let's drink." Ben snatched the list from your grasp as you laughed, settling into your new reality. It wasn't much different from the one you'd known and loved, after all. After ordering, you dodged a couple of very embarrassing questions from Ben, and managed to talk Joe out of answering them. The three of you chatted most about the way things had been. Your favorite parts of the month you'd spent with Olive in tow. The boys claimed to miss her, but neither more than you.

Then Ben got a call from Rami. And through a short conversation you only heard one side of, you came to understand the leading man was coming to crash your dinner party. This was of course good news. You weren't sure you'd get the chance to see him again before the weekend was up, let alone spend with the cast you'd come to know and love all at once.

You weren't surprised to see Lucy had tagged along with her man. She cast him across the table next to Joe, so she could sit next to you and complain about the way she'd already chipped a very expensive nail.

"Somebody better call Gwil, he can't be the only one left out. Imagine the Instagram comment's he'd leave out of spite." Lucy piped up, glancing across the table full of your favorite people. Joe was first and fastest to volunteer, putting Gwil on speaker to overwhelm the guy with plea's  from across your table for him to come and join.

When he finally showed up, and your waiter took everyone's orders, everything finally felt normal again. You sat in the middle of your five favorite people,  arguing over each other, stealing chips, sharing laughs. And all the tension from before vanished. You hadn't realized how all captivating the stress from before had been, until you'd settled into peace. Until you felt Joe's knee knock against yours while he grinned as if to ensure he'd meant to catch your attention. You'd smiled back before taking a swing of your liquor for good luck, hoping a silent toast to the feelings that spread in your chest when you caught Joe staring you, would superstitiously keep those glances coming.

When you'd down a couple of drinks and Lucy had switched seats to take some ridiculous photo with Joe, you'd been instructed to use your phone to capture the moment. When you blindly reached into your bag, you pulled out something that wasn't at all what you'd been looking for.

It was Olive's beloved toy bat. The one she'd throw a fit over if it wasn't in view. The toy had been lost in your purse the whole time you'd been away from the girl. You locked wide eyes with Gwilym across the table and each of you let out an "oh shit" in unison.

He'd already been clutching his phone, giving you a look you knew meant he was checking in with the group chat that himself, James, and Andy made up three fourths of. Having been put ever so slightly at ease, you snapped the photos of Lucy and Joe toasting their drinks to each other- for good luck, you decided.

Before you could toss your phone away, it buzzed to life with a message from your flatmates. You checked in a hurry to make sure their world wasn't turned upside down by the baby they were sitting who was missing her prized possession.

The first message was a photo of your daughter, curled up at Andy's side, the stuffed penguin from the London Aquarium tucked under her other arm.

James: Think she's got a new favorite anyhow!

You smiled to yourself, tucking your phone away. Gwil would see, and be put at ease when he checked his end of the group chat later. For now, he was debating the best kinds of breakfast foods with Rami and Joe, each steadfast in their answers. The lot of you stayed there until Ben was slurring about Frankenstein, and Lucy had waited long enough for her one drink to wear off.

Gwil left you with the promise he'd see you again in a couple of days to give you a lift to the train station. Rami and Ben took turns trading hugs with you and everyone else, before piling in to head home.

Lucy corralled you and Joe to her car, insisting to both of you that Ben and Rami couldn't hear your exaggerated ongoing goodbyes from inside the car they drove off in.

And when the three of you piled into her ride, Lucy made plans to keep on drinking, and watch a few bad movies together, while you still had the time. She invited Joe to join in, not because she was quite keen to spend all night hearing his drunken rambles, but because she knew you were. He worried that he didn't have proper movie night attire, and Lucy insisted she could loan him some of Rami's joggers. You were buzzed enough to lean a little closer to whisper something in Joe's ear about not needing to worry about wearing any clothes, later. The two of you subdued snickers like a couple of virgin teenagers.

But it still took Joe the whole ride to Lucy's to gain the courage to hold your hand. And when his fingers laced through yours, you dared not let go for the rest of the evening. You were determined to hold on for the rest of the weekend. For the rest of forever. You weren't about to let Joe slip away, no matter what happened next. You were in it together, now. 

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

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