#no they both look so good im eating this up
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Cosmere Characters as Parents
As requested by anon. :)
If Cosmere characters who aren't currently parents (or who never got that chance) were parents, what would they be like?
1. Adolin
LOVES playing dress-up
Small child: And YOU'RE my servant, Radiant Princess Assassin Duelist! Adolin [solemnly wearing a princess hat and armor, carrying a large wooden sword]: I am at your service, Your Highness.
2. Siri
I'm seeing: Midnight Family Picnics.
Siri: Whose ready for Midnight Family Picnic?? Both kids: [cheering] Siri: Tonight we have a lovely assortment of sweet treats, assorted nuts for salt, and of course a Surprise Stew that the cook whipped up! Siri: Let's set up the tent, and we can get eating!!
3. Kaladin
Wants to support his kid in everything...but may be slightly overprotective
Small child: Dad, Dad look! I climb ALL the way to top! Kaladin: Wow! Great job!! Syl: Wow! I'm surprised you're letting him climb a rock that tall! Kaladin: Well, you know. It's good for a kid to get to explore and be fearless. Syl: ... Syl: Got him Lashed so he can't fall, huh? Kaladin: You know it.
4. Shallan
Has a little bit of trouble setting boundaries--she just doesn't want her kid to feel restricted, you know?
Teenager: See ya, Mom! Gonna go set a building on fire. Shallan: Hey, wait a second! Shallan: You got a good reason? Teenager: Yeah. Shallan: Got a plan to avoid being caught? Teenager: Of course. Shallan: Okay--have fun!! Radiant: ... Shallan: What?
5. Nikaro
As an emo guy, he of course ends up with a kid who is the opposite.
Akane: Are you wearing...a pink shirt with a heart on it? Nikaro: My daughter is obsessed with kawaii fashion. Nikaro: She wanted to style me. Akane: That also explains the sparkly eyeshadow. Nikaro: It does. Akane: ... Akane: Is your goth soul dying inside? Nikaro: Only a little.
6. Yumi
It feels inevitable that Yumi would give birth to a tiny Godzilla child.
Yumi: Look! Mommy made the stack sooooo high! Child: [shrieking with delight as they plow right into it, knocking it over] Yumi: [smile only slightly strained] A mother's love is a powerful thing.
7. Lopen
They say it takes a village, and Lopen definitely has that.
Sigzil: You know...I'm impressed by how well-rounded your kid is. Lopen: Ha ha! A Herdazian is always well-rounded--and very often round as well! Lopen: Every cousin teaches 'im something--he's learned to cook and talk quick and make friends and tell jokes and stick people to walls and all the things! Small Lopen child: [flips someone off] Lopen: He learned that from me! Sigzil: You don't say...
8. Tress
Raises her child on the high seas.
Child: [screaming a sea shanty at the top of her lungs while she swabs the deck] Ann: She getting punished for something? Tress: What? No! She just likes to sing and her favorite one is about swabbing the decks. Tress: I tried to get her interested in spores, but apparently that's not as exciting as swabbing the deck. Ann: [patting her on the back] Well, there's still plenty of time to share your incredibly dangerous hobby with your kid. Tress: Yeah, you're right!
9. Elend
Just doesn't want his kid to have a childhood like his
Elend: Wait a minute...are you reading that book after I told you that the thesis was juvenile speculation sprung from the mind of a man without two thoughts to rub together? Teenager: Yeah, what of it? I'm not gonna take your word for it! Elend: [sniffs] I-I'm so proud!
10. Vin
Just doesn't want her kid to have a childhood like hers.
Sazed: Wow so this is your baby, huh? Vin: Yup! Sazed: So....round. And happy. Vin: Yup! [The fattest, happiest baby you've ever seen gives Sazed a sleepy smile] Sazed: She's...perfect.
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Hi everyone, kind of a long update:
I booked an appointment at the doctors for the lumps in my neck, only to realise after some heavy googling afterwards that my lymph nodes are just swollen, which yes is weird bc I’m not ill, but they are relatively normal for swollen lymph nodes, as in they’re painful (a good sign), and they aren’t absolutely massive. So now I’m afraid I’m gonna look like an absolute knob to the doctor because i didn’t even know you had lymph nodes there 🫠
They have no apparent cause to be swollen though, so on a whim I did a little research to see if my 4n0r3x14 is what’s causing it, and I didn’t find any professional healthcare websites on this, but I did find a comment on an 3D forum of a girl who said she was 4n0r3x1c for just under a year and had permanent swollen lymph nodes in her neck.
Another commenter replied saying that it could essentially just be that her body is treating her as if she’s permanently sick, and so is mass-producing lymphocytes (white blood cells) to try and fight some invisible infection lol (when it’s really an 3D)
So if it’s anything, it’s probably that. But obviously I ain’t telling the doctor that, I’ve contemplated cancelling the appointment, but with my social anxiety I just feel like it would be an even bigger inconvenience to them and also I realllyyyyy hate calls.
Also, another thing I’ll mention here to see if anybody has any possible reason for this: I haven’t had my period yet, when I definitely should have. And I know your periods can stop with an 3D, but this fast? Really? I’ve only been back into it for 2 weeks. I’ve had the other symptoms that a period is coming, mainly my b00b$ (idk if I can say that without getting t3rm3d or smth lol), but yeah they’ve been very tender and heavy, which usually happens before my period, but I’ve just not had one still, and they‘ve been tender like that now for a good week and a half.
I definitely don’t think I’m pregnant, but my boyfriend is going to pick me up a test today just to bring me some ease.
Anyways, back to the actual 3D shit:
I haven’t eaten today yet, I had a C4 energy drink (15) before bc I was exhausted (I haven’t been to sleep all night), and I’m scared of gaining today if I eat my usual amount bc I haven’t been to sleep (idk the logic of that either really, I think my brain is trying to count it as adding onto yesterday’s c4ls lol).
It was supposed to be my fasting day today, but I got scared that the doctor was going to make me get a blood test (which he still might, but not today), and then it would show that I have barely any nutrients in my body. I haven’t eaten anyways, so either way, if he was gonna do one today I’d be fcked. But I’m gonna have a skinny bar or a fibre brownie or smth before I leave, just to hopefully keep me going for a little longer.
I’m also in work today, only on a 4 hour shift, which is both bad and good, bad for my money but good for my wellbeing lmfao.
Gonna take my rest day today since I haven’t slept, and I just know that going the doctors and THEN work straight after will drain the life out of me.
Idk how much I’ll eat today, I’m not feeling like eating much, but I will update you guys later on obviously with my daily rundown.
Im very scared, but I will be fine, everything will be done with soon, and I can relax and then just pure bash Minecraft when I come in lol.
If you made it this far, thank you, you’re very kind (:
Thank u all for being here.
#4norexla#thinspp#4nerex1a#ed but not ed sheeran#@na rules#light as a feather#4n@diary#4nor3xia#tw ed ana#an4m1a#an4r3xia#an4mi4#an4rexia#an4mia#ana y mia#anor3c1a#4n4m1a#4n4rex1a#4n4t1ps#4n0r3x!4#4narex1a#4n0rexic#4n4blr#4n4rexia#4n4tips#34t1ng dis0rder#3d but not sheeren#tw 3d vent#3d not sheeran#34t1ng d1s0rd3r
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big day for the wings of fire community
#wings of fire#clay looks so cool here im so happy to see more canon art of him#also why did they make scarlet cunty#why#no they both look so good im eating this up#ill devour any scarlet canon art I can find shes my favorite evil woman#shes serving so much boss bitch#wof limited edition#wof cover art#wof canon art#wof clay#wof queen scarlet#joy ang art#joy ang does it again
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first of all. v, i love your brain.
second. your writing skills???? this fic serves. i love this so much. the plot was so fucking good? AND THE TWIST? GODDAMN. i did not expect that. and the smut was hot too. i just went through a roller coaster of emotions.
third. i came here bcuz this looked nice and spicy, now my heart is broken into two.
annotations;
Corrupting Demon Hunters was delicious. Candy to the soul. If you truly had one.
grrr yes
That night, he was not engaging in conversation he was distracted. His gaze was set on you.
oh fuck, this is hot
Other times when he is burning with need, he would just go to yours, tail between his legs. Those times were the best.
im just a girl, i see a man like this, i fold so fast 🎀
No, the real root of his anger was that every night and every day, his mind was clogged with thoughts of you, like a disease eating away at his brain. Every time he blinked or took a breath you were present in there.
hehe 😌
He hated it.
not hehe 🧍♀️
Jeonghan blinked away, the tips of his ears red from both the third beer making his blood heat up and, obviously, from being startled by you.
it was just a wink, calm down
But gods, giving in felt so good.
forbidden tropes >>>>
As soon as you got to the tight, secluded alleyway of the pub, Jeonghan pressed your back against the exit door, pinning you with his body before grabbing your face with one hand, fingers digging into your cheeks before attacking you with a chaste kiss.
“Shut up. Don’t make me take a fourth,” he muttered darkly as he leaned over to plant a slow kiss on your lips. “I’d gladly kill you.”
At that, you laughed. “Sounds fun,”
asdfghjkl, i love their bickering. their dynamics >>>
You were unsure whether Jeonghan even realized that the reason why you were not feeding on human flesh was because you fed off his lust. His guilt and greed were so delicious that you did not need to reap souls.
damn, being a demon sounds fun
Past the scars and the bruises, past his skin, you saw his soul. It was a fiery, chaotic smoking light. Like a candlelight that dances erratically inside him.
GRRRRRRRRRRRRR, IM FERAL. FUCK, BRUISES? SCARS?? (i love his soul too <33)
But since everything he did with you was sinful, it was getting harder for him to tell.
asdfghjkl lmao
What have you done to me, the words echo in your head, making your pulse quicken. No matter how many times he has said this to you, or many other things equally as hurtful. It never failed to break you.
🧍♀️i love this
But you loved seeing that fire in his eyes, loved feeling the guilt pulsating in his veins. He smelled of fear, anguish, greed and lust. He wanted you, he hated you.
“You thought yourself to be special,” he gritted, pushing his cock relentlessly inside you, his fingers choking the life out of you. “You’re nothing to me. Nothing.”
something is wrong with me. why do i find this ... so hot
Jeonghan hated this. Jeonghan loved this. Hated it. Loved it.
RAHHHH 🦅🦅
“I hate you,” he said, his voice reducing to a mere whisper.
🥺 ok i'd actually cry tbh
Jeonghan would not want you had you been human.
wha-ow, that was uncalled for.
“I hate you more,” you said, though your tone was devoid of all venom.
aww, man🧍♀️this hurts
“Jeonghan, don’t go…” you said, sobs starting to coil in your throat.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
You were what smouldered the fire within him. You were the peace to his chaos. The bond he could never break not even in death, his soulmate.
WHAT? OH MY FUCING FGOD? R UFJVCJN SERIOSU? IM LITERALLY IN SHOCK
the curse | yoon jeonghan
› pairings: yoon jeonghan x female reader › aus: demon hunter jeonghan, supernatural au, demon reader › genres: angst, smut (18+) › word count: 4.6k
› 🎧: faux – katie | kiss&tell – ethan low and gen neo
› this one shot is part of my hannieween fest/kinktober special!
› warnings after the cut! READ THEM CAREFULLY 🗣️
› warnings: smut with little plot, exhibitionism, hate fucking, switch jeonghan, switch reader, humiliation kink, breath play, dirty talk, rough fucking, impact play, sadomasochism, monster fucking, a little bit of corruption kink, creampies, degradation/praise kink, hair pulling kink, no aftercare. pet names: wicked thing, baby, baby demon (hers)
› disclaimer: minors dni this post is intended for 18+ readers. please have your age stated in your description and try not to look like a bot please 🙂.
› author's note: as always, this is not proofread heh. i hope you enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing it..... i might write more things like this in the future
the curse
YOON JEONGHAN HAD EVERYTHING A DEMON LOVED TO CURRUPT. He was not the stuffy kind that would cross to the dark side to become evil after a little persuading, no. He was cruel and dangerous.
He had all the traits you would expect from a demon hunter. You had been told all your life to be weary of his kind. But what would life be without a little fun? Corrupting Demon Hunters was delicious. Candy to the soul. If you truly had one.
Jeonghan was sitting with his friends at one of the last tables of the pub. That night, he was not engaging in conversation he was distracted. His gaze was set on you.
You concealed a smile by biting your lower lip. You knew Jeonghan kept coming back to the pub to see you prancing around the tables. There he sat, a beautiful mess, riddled with a tension that he was too blind or too naïve to comprehend.
Hunters were not like regular humans. They could sense demons from a mile away naturally, they could resist the temptations that demons offered as easily as breathing. But that did not take away from the fact that they were mortal. They had a weakness in their being that demons loved way too much.
Even if hunters and demons hated each other by nature, too. Irresistible. That is one word that you liked to use whenever Jeonghan was around. Even if he was perched on his chair, eyes on you as if you were his source of entertainment, sipping on a beer slowly.
With your back turned to him, you felt his gaze piercing your back. It set your nerves ablaze, your blood thickening under your skin, making it prickle with a thrilling sensation. You wondered if he felt the same things the longer he looked at you.
Now, Jeonghan was no fool. He only came here the nights when he was craving for fun. Other times when he is burning with need, he would just go to yours, tail between his legs. Those times were the best.
But that night you knew he was trying to come off as uninterested. That is why he had not talked to you or even made a clear invitation to walk to his table. You kept yourself away from him, letting one of your co-workers serve his friends and him.
Jeonghan drank deeply from his pint, finishing it off with a pleased exhale. He lifted two fingers at one of the other servers, ordering another. You saw it on his face now more clearly, taking the advantage that his gaze had fallen on your pretty colleague. Jeonghan was pissed.
Why was he pissed?
It had taken everything in him not to arrive at the pub that night. He had been resisting the pull he felt toward you for almost two weeks. The root of his anger did not come from the fact that he could not let more than two weeks go by without coming to see you. He has gone even longer resisting you.
No, the real root of his anger was that every night and every day, his mind was clogged with thoughts of you, like a disease eating away at his brain. Every time he blinked or took a breath you were present in there.
He hated it.
Hunters learned to resist temptation. They invested time, blood, sweat and tears to become stronger, to be lethal to demons. Greatest weapons of the underworld.
You sighed as you set your hands on the countertop of the bar, waiting. You sneaked a look over your shoulder, winking at him once you found his dark eyes on you. Jeonghan blinked away, the tips of his ears red from both the third beer making his blood heat up and, obviously, from being startled by you.
There it was again, he exhaled the taste of beer, he could taste you as he took a breath. Like a drug making his senses go dull. He hated it.
You were a thing he could not make sense of. Yoon Jeonghan was a man of strategy. In this world, he could not afford to give in to his impulses. That gets people like him killed.
But gods, giving in felt so good.
He looked again, also knowing that you kept observing him. With great reluctance, he made a gentle motion towards the back door. It was a simple move, and easy to pass up. But you knew him.
Whereas hunters were cold and calculated, demons were alluring and carefree. Humans repelled demons by instinct, their allure being so strong and strange that humans found demons dangerous. So they would rarely mingle.
But there were exceptions. You were one of them. Jeonghan attributed your ease of blending in the human world to your beauty. Your beautiful smile, your soft hair, your radiant skin. And your eagerness to make friends made you likable. Those things humans felt attracted to.
They did not know just how fucking deadly you were. That was Yoon Jeonghan’s reason for existing, that was why he got paid handsomely: to rid the world of creatures like you, and those he could not kill, he would make them go back into hiding in the underworld.
As soon as you got to the tight, secluded alleyway of the pub, Jeonghan pressed your back against the exit door, pinning you with his body before grabbing your face with one hand, fingers digging into your cheeks before attacking you with a chaste kiss.
You grabbed the hand squishing your cheeks and tossed it off you. “Hi there to you too,” you said.
“No time for that,” he murmured with a gruff tone, you tasted the beer on his tongue. But aside from that, you tasted him.
Demons had more senses than regular humans did. A few more than hunters too. Hunters were superhuman, stronger, faster, and smarter. Demons were all of that too, but they had something hunters did not. Demons held the power to taste souls.
“It’s been a while,” you pointed between hurried kisses, quickly becoming drunk on his tongue, his taste was like nothing else you had ever tasted before. It made your blood thicken, it numbed you, and it gave you pure and uncontainable bliss.
“How many humans have you killed since I last saw you?” he muttered in between rushed, wet kisses, grabbing your wrists to pin them above your head.
“Why, do you care about humans now?” you bit back, grabbing him by the jaw to keep kissing him
Jeonghan cared about humans. Just not too much. His care for humans did not go beyond work-related. They were a necessity.
“How many?” he growled now, inching away from your face.
“One,” you said, pronouncing the syllable as though it were a tragedy. “How many demons have you killed?”
“Three,” he replied flatly.
“Holding yourself back?” you smirked, delighted that he too had been lowering his body count out of confusion.
Usually, you would take three humans per week. They were your source of energy. But you had a rule, not to Jeonghan’s knowing. You limited yourself to humans that were corrupted by transgressing against their kind. You found their sins were too tasty to pass up.
But ever since you started this push and pull with Jeonghan, your body count has decreased in number quite tragically. From taking dozens of lives a week, you barely could take more than three now. And even if Jeonghan does not operate the same way as you do, you satiate your hunger differently.
Jeonghan kills for money, he kills for duty.
“Shut up. Don’t make me take a fourth,” he muttered darkly as he leaned over to plant a slow kiss on your lips. “I’d gladly kill you.”
At that, you laughed. “Sounds fun,” you breathed, nearly swept away by his lips trailing down your jawline. “But are we spicing things up already? We’ve only been doing this for a year…”
Now, why has Jeonghan not killed you?
“Has it been a year already?” he asked aloofly, bending his knees a little before taking your thighs in his hands, you jumping to meet him halfway.
“Time flies when you’re having a good time,” you quipped, craning your neck for him to plant wet kisses down your throat.
“So they say,” he muttered, drunk off your scent but still lucid enough to come back with witty retorts.
There were plenty of monsters in this world. Creatures far deadlier and scarier than you. Nothing, no one in this world, human or not, wanted you as much as Jeonghan did. Why would he kill you? He has everything he wants with you.
You bristled. “Someone’s coming,” you whispered, your eyes flying open.
Like a mental slap, Jeonghan came back to his senses, pulling his head back and stopping his mouth on your skin with a disgruntled sound. He eased you back onto the ground and the exit door of the pub pushed open, you grabbed his wrist, taking him down the alley and towards the path that led down the forest.
You did not escape one of your coworkers seeing you drag Jeonghan to the sea of trees. If you were a human, it would bring you terrible shame to be seen scurrying off to the forest with a man to have privacy.
But being a demon, you knew no shame. You fed off pride, greed and lust.
Jeonghan slipped his wrist off your grasp as though your touch pained him. You were arriving at a small, secluded area covered by tall and thick trees, so you turned to him, just as he used his hands to push your shoulders.
You fell back onto your ass, but you were quick enough to use your elbows as support on the ground, raising your gaze to his fascinated face.
Jeonghan had used enough strength to break human bones. He followed your body, dropping to his knees between your parting legs. “Shall we do this quickly?” he asked, grinning at your eagerness.
“Why, do you have somewhere else to go?” you arched an eyebrow. You wished your words had been laced with sarcasm.
“Would you mind if I did?” he retorted, a hand snaking to find the hem of your knit sweater, pushing it up your chest.
You wanted to say yes. After hoping for two weeks to see him, it deflated you to think Jeonghan was slipping away from you so quickly. “No, of course not,” you replied, shuddering once he gave your tank top the same treatment he did to your sweater, leaving your tits bare.
“That’s what I thought,” he sighed, dipping his head to wrap his mouth around your left nipple.
You arched your back to his lips, just as he palmed your other breast, making you moan. You had gone longer than two weeks without fucking Jeonghan, but that was in the beginnings of this relationship. If you could even call it that.
That was before fucking Jeonghan became an addiction. Demons fed on sin. You were unsure whether Jeonghan even realized that the reason why you were not feeding on human flesh was because you fed off his lust. His guilt and greed were so delicious that you did not need to reap souls.
You have missed this. But you could not bring yourself to tell him that. However, it showed in your actions, arching your back on the ground, leaves and branches creaking under you as you sank your fingers in his long hair.
Jeonghan swallowed back a sound that sounded like a purr against the plain of your breast. “Are you hungry?”
He knows. You furrowed your brow, watching him lift his head to meet your eyes. “Yes,” you admitted.
“Take your clothes off,” he orders with a breathy tone, as if kissing your skin had robbed him of voice.
You sat up, as he knelt back, taking the chest harness off. He rarely removed his weapons when he fucked you in an open space. Whenever he visited you at your apartment, he would usually just leave his knife at hand, on your bedside table or the table he fucked you on.
You stripped the knit sweater, taking the tank top off, eyeing his skin with curious eyes as he took his black shirt off. Jeonghan was lean and strong, he bore bruises and scars all over his chest and arms. Knife, bite and claw marks.
He was beautiful.
Past the scars and the bruises, past his skin, you saw his soul. It was a fiery, chaotic smoking light. Like a candlelight that dances erratically inside him.
Seeing his soul was intrusive. But so alluring that you did not notice he was looking at you through his heavy set of eyelashes.
“What are you waiting for?” he cocked his head to one side, showing you a mocking smirk. “Do you think I’m going to undress you?”
“You did that last time,” you said between your teeth, but you lied back, lifting your hips to skitter off your pants, kicking your boots off with efficacy.
“Last time?” he frowned pensively, pausing before he placed his shirt aside on the ground. He shook his head lightly. “That was the second to last.”
“I get them mixed,” you shrugged, lying to him with ease.
Jeonghan knew whenever demons told a lie. He had been trained to sense whenever you performed a sinful act. But since everything he did with you was sinful, it was getting harder for him to tell.
He did not take his pants off, you did not ask why. You imagined that it was because he wanted to grasp what little dignity he had left in him. Maybe he did not want to strip completely because that gave him more power over you.
You were utterly bare under him. You did not care, you relished at the sight of him growing hard under his black pants either way.
“Turn over,” he said, gently palming the side of your thigh, urging you to move. “Hands and knees.”
You obeyed him, but not before you got to see him push his pants down, getting his cock out. He was fully hard for you, his veiny shaft standing up completely, his tip reddened and leaking precum at the slit.
You got on all fours, planting your hands and knees on the dirt, bracing yourself for him.
He used his knee to move yours on the ground, spreading your legs open a few more inches. “Mm, you missed me,” he noted with a low coo, running two fingertips on your folds. “So hungry, so wet.”
“Stop teasing me,” you bit back, though you were growing hot on the cheeks.
He found you out. But there was another issue. You were feeding off his lust and greed for you. But that did not explain why he also lowered the amount of demon kills he took. Was he doing it by pure choice?
Did Jeonghan feel guilty?
“Please, just give it to me,” you urged with a whimpery tone. You hated it.
“Alright, I’ll give it to you, you needy thing,” he replied with an empty laugh.
And then his fingers left your folds, you nearly whimpered at the loss. But then his fingers were quickly replaced by his cock, gently nudging its tip against your cunt, you clenched around nothing, but he felt your entrance throbbing with his cockhead.
“Fuck,” he sighed, grabbing you by the hips.
You closed your eyes, biting back a moan as his length started sinking in on you. The feeling was delicious, it made your blood surge and dance beneath your skin. It drew a moan out of Jeonghan, bottoming out on you.
He slid a hand from your hip, caressing your skin along the line of your back to meet your shoulder. He held you in place, a hand on your hip and the other on your shoulder before starting to plow on you, his hard thrusts knocking the wind out of you.
The feeling of his cock sliding on your walls was near-euphoric, the tip nudged at your g-spot quite quickly. Jeonghan knew your body better than you, his grip on you was harsh, holding you firmly as his hips jackhammered against your ass. The sound of skin slapping against each other quickly became an echo in the forest.
“Jeonghan…” you moaned blissfully, letting the trees surrounding you that he was making you feel like this.
“Hell,” he murmured under his breath.
You muffled a moan in your mouth, fisting the leaves beneath you as if that could support you from crumbling out of sheer pleasure.
Fucking demons was rapturous. They revelled in perversion, they were the epitome of lust. It was playing with death. No one in their right mind would dare to do it, any mortal would either die or be killed trying. The pleasure was almost mind-shattering.
Jeonghan was past giving a fuck. “Where are your horns?” he muttered, thrusting his cock inside you hard and fast, he sounded out of breath.
“I’m concealing them,” you replied, equally as breathless, already toying at the edge of your release. “Thought you didn’t like them.”
“I don’t,” he grunted, letting go of your shoulder, his hand sliding to the middle of your back. “But I want to see them.”
You shuddered as his hand caressed you with a foreign gentleness. “No,” you replied.
“Come on, baby demon. Show ‘em to me,” he rasped, and you turned over your shoulder to see him.
Jeonghan was beautiful, he was tipping his head back, leaving his throat exposed to your gaze. You saw his throat bobbing when he swallowed hard, he was looking at your face, waiting for you to show him your horns.
“No,” you said, smirking devilishly at him. “I might if you ask nicely.”
“Ha. Nice try,” he sighed.
“What’s wrong, notable demon hunter lost his manners?” you gave him an empty laugh.
Jeonghan lifted his hand on your hip, landing it on your ass with a loud smack. “Stop that,” he warned darkly.
The spank was harsh, he used his raw strength to spank you every time. Your eyes stung with tears, but you gritted your teeth through it.
“I might be a demon, but I like indulging in a man with decorum,” you teased some more, enjoying the quiet flames of his soul growing enraged. You liked toying with him without him noticing it.
“Fuck,” he rasped.
Then a hand tangled in your hair, grabbing a fistful to yank you up. You squealed, but he did not stop fucking you hard and fast.
“You’re the one that needs to learn manners, not me,” he growled in your ear, his lips brushing on your earlobe. He released your hair, using his hands to palm your breasts, his fingers lingering on your nipples.
“Fuck, Jeonghan,” you moaned, arching your back for him, enjoying his cock filling your walls nicely, its tip teasing your g-spot repeatedly, unrelentingly.
“You’re close?” he asked, his tone low and raspy, tickling your senses.
You nodded eagerly, closing your eyes to savour the pleasure brimming inside you. You felt him everywhere. Not just his hands on your tits, or his hips meeting your ass, his cock stuffing you full. His touch made your blood surge, it made your chest tighten and heave.
You loved it.
“Come on me,” he mumbled lazily, removing a hand from your breast to meet your hip. His thrusts were growing sloppy, you knew he was close. “Cream all over my cock, baby.”
You hated him.
You hated that he used that word. He knew that it was a weak point for you. You had no choice, you crumbled back against him, your orgasm washing over you in fiery waves. You moaned loudly, nearly screaming but you did not care. The pleasure was so great, it had you moaning until you had no voice, no breath.
Jeonghan followed, dropping his forehead on your shoulder, dumping his load inside you with sloppy thrusts. He had stopped caring long ago about the consequences that might bring. And you had as well.
“You wicked little thing,” he panted, not quite stopping his thrusts yet. “What have you done to me?”
You gave him no reply, instead, you felt him growing hard inside you, pushing his cum back in. He kept fucking you slowly, as if with each thrust he was giving into you again.
What have you done to me, the words echo in your head, making your pulse quicken. No matter how many times he has said this to you, or many other things equally as hurtful. It never failed to break you.
You used a hand to push his hips off, not caring that his cum slid down your thigh the minute you turned to face him, letting your body fall back onto the ground, bringing Jeonghan with you.
He gasped in surprise, but quickly recovered, positioning his arms around you, framing your head. “Round two?”
“Unless you have somewhere to go,” you smirked.
“I wish,” he replied, though you heard how numbly he sounded. “I wish I could stop wanting this,” he groaned, starting to thrust his hard cock inside you again.
“Careful,” you whispered, the smirk erasing from your face. “I know when you’re lying, hunter.”
His gaze darkened. “You’re not telling me to be careful,” he said. “You’re forgetting that I could kill you.”
“The fact that you haven’t tells me otherwise,” you said, though your tone waned as his thrusts started to become more powerful, you pushed your knees back, letting him drive his cock deeper inside you, drawing out a long moan from you.
A hand clutched your throat firmly, his fingers pressing on your windpipe strongly. You choked, grabbing his wrist to no end, because you let him strangle you.
“Why the fuck would I?” he growled, his face mere inches from yours. “You have the perfect little pussy, the perfect tits, perfect ass… I can’t afford to lose you.”
You blinked your watery eyes, your heart palpitating frantically, your chest constricting at the lack of air.
But you loved seeing that fire in his eyes, loved feeling the guilt pulsating in his veins. He smelled of fear, anguish, greed and lust. He wanted you, he hated you.
“You thought yourself to be special,” he gritted, pushing his cock relentlessly inside you, his fingers choking the life out of you. “You’re nothing to me. Nothing.”
Your lips curled in a smile at the way his body responded upon uttering that sentence. You closed your eyes, nearing the edge of another climax, which you let sweep through you, dancing in your veins.
You cherished the feeling of him inside you, fucking his first load back into you, only to then have it spilled out with each slam of his hips against yours.
“There she is,” he whispered, his dark eyes glinting.
The pleasure was so brutal, you did not realize you had stopped concealing your horns. His fingers stopped pressing on your throat, but his hand lingered there. You looked at him while his gaze coasted at the sight of the black horns that curved back from the crown of your head.
“Don’t,” he muttered when they faded out of his view.
You exhaled, bringing your horns back.
“Wings too,” he whispered.
Even if you could smell the shame coursing through him, you also removed the concealment from your wings, showing how they had been tucked beneath your body the whole time.
Jeonghan slid a hand to your side, caressing your skin before brushing a knuckle on one of your black wings. You shuddered, hard, arching your back and pressing your tits against his chest.
“Jeonghan,” you mewled, closing your eyes under the thrill of having his touch on you.
“Does this make you come?” he asked a hint of playfulness in his tone making you open your eyes to his wide smile.
“Do it again,” you breathed.
At that, he obediently ran the back of two fingers along the soft membranous skin of your wings, the euphoric feeling bringing out a cry from you. “Yes,” you replied to his question.
Though he did not need verbal confirmation from you, your walls clamped around his cock, making him moan too. “Fuck,” he mumbled. “Such a wicked little thing,” he smiled. “Go ahead, demon. Come again.”
Your cheeks grew hot at the derogatory manner he called you. But you did not follow his command exactly.
Jeonghan switched his hand, propping his weight to the other to touch your neglected wing. He sent you a curious glance, right before using the back of his knuckles to brush your wing.
The touch was so light, so tender against your skin that it sent you to another orgasm. It was so brutal that it brought tears to your eyes, it was so euphoric that it made you scream, your mind going blank.
Jeonghan looked at you, completely mesmerized. “Gods,” he groaned, thrusting his hips sloppily on you, giving you his second load. You shuddered, feeling the ropes of hot cum filling you up.
He moved his hand from your wing, his touch gentle and light as he searched your eyes, cupping your cheek before he gave you a surprisingly sweet kiss. His thumb brushed your bottom lip, looking at you the same way he always did before he said goodbye.
Jeonghan hated this. Jeonghan loved this. Hated it. Loved it.
“I hate you,” he said, his voice reducing to a mere whisper.
It was sickening, it made your stomach churn, but it was not enough to make you wish you were something else. Deep down, you knew that Jeonghan would not want you had you been human.
You gave him a hollow laugh. “I hate you more,” you said, though your tone was devoid of all venom.
Then, the familiar pulsating feeling came. It only happened once in a while. It overwhelmed you with something you both welcomed and rejected. It was like a tight hand gripping your very soul. Jeonghan felt it too, you felt his body tensing up, still connected to yours.
Here it comes. You braced yourself.
Jeonghan retreated, slowly. He used his hand on your lower abdomen to push himself from you, grunting slightly as his cock slid out of your walls. With a heaviness that made his limbs clumsy, he gathered himself, standing up in front of you.
He tucked himself back in, picking up the rest of his things, with a perplexed look. It always happened like this.
He slowly turned his back on you, staggering against a tree, using a hand on it for support, he started panting in panic. You saw his back rise and fall just as you sat up on the ground, wrapping your wings around you protectively.
“Jeonghan, don’t go…” you said, sobs starting to coil in your throat.
But he did not look back.
The pulsating feeling gripped you harder this time, and that was enough to make you choke back a sob. Jeonghan grunted too, resuming to walk away disjointedly until he disappeared in the crowd of trees.
You wondered if this would be the last time you saw him. You wondered if the next time he saw you would be when he finally killed you.
There are plenty of monsters in this world, and plenty of mysteries too. You might be a mystery to Jeonghan, but he was not to you. Finally, you wondered if he suspected that the reason why he could not kill you was the same as why he could get enough of you.
You were what smouldered the fire within him. You were the peace to his chaos. The bond he could never break not even in death, his soulmate.
› author's note: i've done it! i finally write a fic that's under 10k words!!! aaaaaaaa
i've got nothing to say. i just want jeonghan to split me open with his cock in the middle of a forest
anyways,
toodles (✿◠‿◠)
support me on ko-fi?
✧ READ PART TWO! ✧
© RIGHTS RESERVED TO HANNIEWEEN I DO NOT ALLOW TRANSLATIONS, CONTINUATIONS, REIMAGINATIONS OF MY WORKS OR THEIR REPOSTING ON OTHER WEBSITES.
#lola's recs <3#this was so fucking good#and such a delicious read#i regret not reading this in october 🧍♀️#i so badly wanna read the second part#but my bed is calling
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binding vow
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#megumi#fanart#jjk fanart#done....collapses#up until 3am last night n sitting fr another 8 hours today to finish....#g o d#the things i do fr him.....#let it no longer b said that i only do elaborate paintings rife with symbolism tht feature gojo. megu my one true muse#as is Correct and Just#real talk tho i was just sketching th things i wanted to include without giving much thought to the Themes#w the exception being the spider lilies lmao I Know What Those Mean#but i ended up with a REALLY good life/death/marriage/loyalty thing going on????#w the lotus/spider lily being purity+rebirth/death#((not 2 mention 'far from the one he loves' like HELLO?????))#also w the temari balls being associated w femininity but having him dressed in groom's attire#like???? 90% unplanned but i ended up both cooking And eating#also happy 2 report that betta fish were kinder 2 me than the koi were :) no trouble from these lil guys#in fact everything abt this piece kind of came easily beyond the initial colour swatch??#thank u fr being an easy subject megu ilysm im sorry abt all the death imagery i dont mean it pls focus instead on th Life imagery :((((#i put a ring on it so u gotta wake up.....cant leave yuuji @ th altar ....#SPEAKING OF THE RING IK ITS ON THE RIGHT HAND we've been over this and its Okay#if i read a single comment .........#sorry 2 that one person who was like 'the next binding vow better be at itfs' wedding' ik this probably wasnt what u meant#but it did inspire me smile :)#anyway i need 2 stop looking at this its been over 24 hours
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(do you love me like that?) you're a reckless driver (I'm a reckless driver) and one day it will kill us if I —
#yellowjacketsedit#yjedit#akilahmari#lyricsongifs#yellowjacketscentral#ok i WANT TO DISCLAIM. im not 100% sold on pitgirl mari im not 100% sold on anything. the show will tell me when its ready!#that SAID im incapable of giffing unless theres tragedy involved and also i think it would be an interesting trajectory for them#akilahmari work imo because while different they are both very vulnerable in the same way#they want to be seen and cared for and they arent in an environment where thats easy#and like. yeah the you tell me all the time to keep my eyes on the road gif IS the gay scenes#but its also akilah being in tune with people and their emotions. ofc she knows taivan love each other ofc she knows lottienat need a momen#and later ofc she knows lottie and nat need a moment!!! that skill serves her as tension escalates#whereas mari cannot read a room + does not filter herself. and akilah often gets the best of that from her!#but also. akilah shoots her a look when she presses javi about the missing bear meat. but also. mari isnt wrong to be concerned#mari is vulnerable and scared !!!AND!!! heavily concerned about survival. so whereas akilah and mari are both scared to hunt javi#mari is the second to run to grab javis body. akilah follows still horrified. mari is better suited to survive in a lot of ways#but also tends to step on toes!!! but also mari is so loyal and so like. attentive? eager? in a way akilah isnt#so mari says more controversial things but ultimately follows status quo in a way akilah is less inclined to#even in terms of skills mari can cook and akilah can sew but eventually what good is stitching people up when they need to eat. you know.#IDK i think theyre soooo interesting and im rly looking forward to their relationship hopefully developing bc i think theyre cute and fun#but i think their dyn could get sooooo interesting. even in terms of letting mari go. like. many connotations#akilah can giggle when the jokes are still funny and they can find each other in any given space. but does that matter if it cant save them#anyway ive run out of tags to tag the chars for my blog and im being really brave about it btw.#also its 2 am and i wanna post and im being even braver about that (not deleting this tag but its not 2 am my time as i post im drafting<3)
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Jack Marsh (2005), Friendship Otherwise - Toward a Levinasian Description of Personal Friendship
#saw carnation lily lily rose by john singer seargent irl today. it was basically at my doorstep all along idk why i never went to see it#it was placed at a corner in the gallery. me and my friend sat down and sketched the paintings of beautiful naked people quite badly. paper#provided by tate britain. she told me about how she couldnt look her boyfriend in the face after a harrowing film about war. when i say the#interview was informal i mean the person who was supposed to be my boss told me let me get you a cider and then he said after#50 years of life he knows people are inherently good and it only takes a little bit of kindness to save this world. he said he tricked#his wife into keeping the baby and then he said he quit his job at a US bank to help people find meaning and in it#he would have liked to find meaning. instead he started climbing with his friends. he said he chews his cigarettes because its a habit from#when he had to hide things from people. the entire time i felt uncomfortable and incredibly enlightened. this is my friends mentor. she has#his pattern of pauses and expletive and penchant for ends-justify-means attitude. i do think im not very clever#but maybe one day i will love you enough to make up for it. i wrote code i dont understand staring at the final error i thought about how#we both thought of how when we're too old to remember the voices of our friends we would like to stand in the pathway of the LHC beam pipe#cut it open and eat light in the freezing cold vacuum (kills you long before radiation will) the invisible puncture wound unfolding dna#back to the start larger than you ever were. you go to heaven once youve been to hell. my friend is in my bed#practicing calculations of eigenvectors by hand and she is uninterested in a visual proof you are uninterested in incompetence#we catch a train this is your kind of burden you tragic hero wincing at that word you only do this because you have to. im the only one#who can. i am a coward in this for the fucking poetry. the visual proofs. the pretty numbers. an architect who was horrible at maths wanted#to be a philosopher and accidentally ended up neck in deep in 70th Error On Visual Studio Code i want to kiss your eyes before we say#goodbye we both know there is no love in the way there should be. I still have your dress in my wardrobe. i hope you make art.#you think im alright head-wise i think you fucking hate me i think ill never be so clever you want me to tell you my idea?#if you wanted more of this world i would have liked to kiss you harder. we cant both be like this. im sorry i cant be with you the whole wa#the love is gone if you have to ask it. his breath catches his eyes feel stiff it is -1.9 kelvin he is near the beam pipe i miss holding#his hand i miss her singing voice i miss his hair and i found the antonym of pain thank you for carrying me home.
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Heddwyn "Wyn" Caldera is a freshman from Diasomnia. He's well known in alchemical circles for multiple revolutionary breakthroughs in the world of potions, the first of which he discovered at eight years old. Though invited to NRC last year at age thirteen, he waited a year before accepting a position at the school.
here he is my baby boy......!!!! been tossing this kid around in my head a lot lately and wanted to make a profile card for him to show him off to the world. imagine me as a proud parent and ive pulled this out of my wallet.
based off the black cauldron. both the movie and like. the cauldron itself. naturally he is good at potions. since the cauldron is essentially a mcguffin wanted by everyone the idea is that he's extremely good at what he does but is also pretty vulnerable to being used. he's also very stone-faced bc he's...... made of stone............ get it.............
template is from here!
#twst oc#twisted wonderland#his fave food is veggies bc i think being a 14yo boy who eats Spinch and Enjoys It is funny#im still turnign over his unique magic in my head........ i think the thing i initially wanted for him im keeping for his eldest brother#he and deuce get along well (he is a cauldron) but tbh i dont think he has many other friends#i think theyre parters in pe and i think he tries to tutor deuce in potions and i think both these things go badly. u kno how it is.#if he put as much effort into his magic as he did his potions hed be a prodigy there too. unfortunately he likes Stir and Brew.#doted on in science club. rook praises the shit he works on and he gets so excited and happy and trey is just glad theyre getting along#tbh i dont think trey realizes at first baby is literally world-famous hes just like. theres a kid in this club. ill be nice.#has a good rship with crewel overall tho theres always an odd line for him to walk btwn 'this person is a revolutionary genius at potions'#and 'this kid is fourteen and the most awkward child i have ever taught' u kno.#he ta's in the third years class sometimes. as you do#looks up to malleus and dislikes lilia (too playful/unserious for his tastes) respects silver a lot but finds sebek Very Rude#(they are seat mates)#OK THATS A LOT OF THOUGHTS FOR TAGS and i wnana lie down. think abt my baby please. ok goodnight#wyn stuff#how do you art
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I really hate how my physical body looks so so so much. unfortunately there isn't much I can do about it.
#ive got fat genetics from both parents families going back generations and ive been trying to lose weight forever#my stupod body likes being fat i can excercise like crazy and eat barely anything and i wont lose anything#i was excercising 2+ hours a day before i got sick and it made me stronger but i.stayed fat. now that im sick im weak and still fat.#and im not the kind of fat anybody can find pretty. if i could somehow not be fat id be decent to look at my face isnt bad#my skin is bad though my skin sucks#in my eyes im disgusting#and its so messed up because i dont think other fat people are gross#but i hate how i look so much that i cant imagine anyone being okay with it#like no matter how kind and understanding and sweet i am to people its never gonna make up for the fact that my body is grossly ugly#and i cant blame anyone for not liking me i get it.#sorry#this is a problem i have#bacause i just usually pretend my body doesnt exist and i wear pretty loose fitting dresses that cover me completely so but#even though i am what i am#sometimes you happen to meet a nice person and they are polite and dont seem disgusted by your existance so then your traitorous brain t#thinks hey maybe this person would be willing to marry us someday if they got to know us. which is so silly becuz theres no way thatd ever#so it makes me sad when i should be happy that a nice person talked to me. yay good job successful friendlyness. but it has to remind me#that i had this expectation from when i was a kid that id marry somone and have at least 3 kids and love my kids and take care of them and#give them everything i needed when i was a kid. and of course that never happened. because i never dated anyone. because people dont just#magically get married out of nowhere. its stupid. so i keep trying to be okay with whatever. but i guess i never stopped wanting a family.#which we know im aroace now so. i need to stop. but my brain is always bothering me about this.#why can't i just accept that no one will ever love me. why cant i be happy that they dont?#ive got cats#someday i will have irl friends again#sorry i think everything would be so much easier if i was just#this isnt a problem with an easy solutiom#i guess im gonna try to do the useless excercises again because at least it will look like im trying even though nothing will change
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saskia del norma. woman that you are. character of all time
#as a saskia girlie i've been eating good this season#and i am going through a lot right now and shitposting is the best way i have to cope for it#in the “Systems Hurt People And Systems Make Hurt People Hurt People” show (massive oversimplification yes i know)#thank you Saskia for being a thread of “People Can Help People Too”#the back half of s3 might have made her one of my fave chars in fiction. i think#shes up there for sure#midst#midst spoilers#saskia del norma#while im here. the moments where Saskia looks directly at people instead of looking past them#beautiful narrative device. beautiful#“with a fullness and a realness that both warms and paralyzes [Weepe]. It was always so heartstopping when she looked directly at you”#yeah! yeah i imagine so!
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i love doodling swapinverse like hello drawing characters aside from the normal mtt is lowkey therapeutic 🧡🧡🧡 anyways i FINALLY FINALLY finished crash's lore!!!! and vice.SER is connected to him,,,, theyre interconnected!!! i forgot how much i liked crash's design (not the design but all the little gimmicks in the design. figuring out all the hanging ribbon bits is annoying but hey it looks good)
#outertale does not exist in swapinverse anymore. how quaint#dude thalia and melpomene are th only ones that r like. 100% good#I NEED TO MAKE MORE GOOD AND NICE CHARACTERS😭😭😭😭#mst..... recreators (qip name 4 siphon n crash?) and vice.SER........ theyre all EVIL (or have evil goals)#i WAS thinking doing something with reaper because i adore his design and aesthetic and i wanna combine it with SOMETHING idk what#anyways if core frisk error which is supposed to be vice.SER exists then should normal core frisk exist too?????#i mean i dont think that just because a core frisk role esque person exists doesnt mean the role is instantly filled up#the mst and mtt co exist in swapinverse but those 3 are like.... NORMAL aus. not outcodss n stuff#i love the giant lance thing i gave crash. i mean the ribbons can form any weapon and take any shape (kinda like puella magi mami's guns)#but like..... it just is so cool i love characters that use multiple weapons#i LOVE (haha) every single little gimmick thing i give swapinverse characters. the tiny details is what i adore giving them#if you catch me not posting 4 a bit its probably just bc im working on swapinverse or jk fashion au. or maybe ive seriously just lost motiva#anyways i have a few banger rants in my drafts ive yet to elaborate om but just like....... i dont feel like it#someon needs to wrangle those posts out of my tired lazy arms#lowkey why do siphon and crash remind me of kanade and mafuyu. idk i cant explain#if you cut vice.ser in half it would be like jelly with binary in it. i wanna eat him#he would tingle on my tongue but thats just the static. eating yhe glasses would be difficult bit they dont have lenses so its ok#i drew them both looking at us but i think that vice.ser is the only true one always looking at US.looking out from inside#god i love swapinverse sooo much i wish i could get it done faster and be goatedly good with motivation. a shame#but i do think that i may be finishing up the character descriptions 500% ish sure#SO THEN THAT MEANS I CAN WORK ON THE ACTUAL STORY!!!! WOOOOO#ive already decided that theres gonna be mentions of me myself and i in it. i love meta storytelling#im cursed with perpetually sweaty hands i hate having to draw on slighty damp paper. nobody understands me#UGH im getting too happy in life im starting to act weird in public and offering to help people. i need to stop#anyways just school doodles!!! because in the period where they take our phones i have naught to do but draw#i need to get back (start) my english reading. and then help my friend with a few questions on her homework. how joyous#and then i can get back to my BETTER homework (working on swapinverse :3)#crash managed to destroy outertale in his lore i wonder how many worlds vice.SER will destroy#actually if hes supposed to be core frisk error then i should make him NOT destroy worlds right???? right#tricule rant
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getting to go back to being s*nnav*rstappen tomorrow… holy fuck. genuinely holy fuck.
#.txt#ill still be here really often. i dont think ill log back into my old blog on mobile#i think its rlly good for me actually to have a dash without eff one on it at all#bc it eats up my dash so much on my other blog. and i love having a space for all my other thoughts#idek if ill keep the same username on that blog#i dont… necessarily want to be associated w s3nna anymore even tho i rlly do like him#well. its more like. i love my boy so much more than him that it feels kinda weird having them in my username both#i have some rlly good usernames hoarded ill take a look at those#itll be wild to change. but i mean. i *have* changed.#ill still forever feel like s3nn4v3rst4pp3n. im sure. but maybe its time to move on from that username#idk why im having such a hard time w that??#autism??? maybe?????#holy fuck im writing a novel here#lmao 😭#diary#november 2024
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what if. Amy “fix-it” because hallucifer makes sam so paranoid about dean leaving for no reason that sam gives in and follows him and is witness to the whole thing
#hallucifer: wow. big brother really trusts us. (beat) so something’s up right? we know it’s never this easy.#sam: (visibly restraining himself from saying shut up. about to grab his scar.)#hallucifer: (aware he’s about to be banished) don’t listen to me if you want but. I’m just trying to help.#don’t blame me if you look in the papers tomorrow and find a obit for your brain-eating girlfriend. and… what was her kid’s name again?#sam: (touching the scar. not pressing down. face all screwed up.) || hallucifer: :3 it’s not like it’ll hurt anyone#if he really does trust you he doesn’t even have to know we’re following him. *and* you’ll know your brother still trusts you.#even when I’m here. maybe he won’t even punch you again. that still hurting?#sam: (grimace. because yeah. it does.) || hallucifer: door number two - he thinks you’ve lost it and he’s going to stab that woman to death.#so what’s it gonna be Sam? ready to gamble your friend’s life on if Dean gives a shit about your opinion?#[and that’s the point where sam goes to follow dean. still doesn’t talk to Lucifer. not there yet. but oh hallucifer is sooo pleased with#himself about this. because he’s Sam. and he picks up on what Sam doesn’t. and he could see all of Dean’s little giveaways that Sam was#turning a blind eye to. and now here’s the perfect opportunity to put a wedge between them and get sam to trust him more <3)#GOD. FUCK. IM UPSET NOW. WHY WASNT HALLUCIFER IN THAT EPISODE. MOST OF THE EPISODES?#such a good fucking concept. squandered.#anyway. idk if sam saves Amy but he DEFINITELY here’s Dean’s little speech to her about how she can’t change.#hallucifer with faux sympathy like (sigh) damn. well. i always told you what he was like. Michael. Michael-sword. no difference.#both of them want us dead the moment we step out of line.#and Sam just frozen there in horror with Lucifer’s voice sinking in. and he believes him. how can he not. with dean proving him right#hallucifer#spn#sam winchester#amy pond
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I think making sweeping generalizations of specific traits being considered "ugly" is not great the same way i think its rude and unnecessary to call others ugly, i also think its worthwhile to acknowledge that certain traits ARE considered "Ugly" due to societal beauty standards, that doesn't make them ACTUALLY ugly, bc beauty is subjective anyway, and can be found Anywhere, and even someone who seems to tick every single box of societal beauty Ideals will almost certainly have at least one trait or feature about their appearance that they are insecure about or feel is "ugly", bc even within the constraints of conventional attractiveness theres subjectivity
also this fish was so fucking Ugly and i adored it so much. i miss him.
he was also gorgeous.
#toy txt post#toy pic post#he passed in like. man. i want to say 2019? his name was Gus. he was a pink kissing gourami#the thing about albino fish is that they always look a little bit sickly and concerning. his head always seemed a little big for his body#like he was really old. when i got him he looked so bad cos he had wounds all over him from dads fish that got infected and the dude#straight up looked like a zombie. every day id wake up and prepare myself to find him dead. but he recovered and never went back in w the#fish that injured him. his face was hideous. he looked pale and sickly. his head was a little too big like he was super old#his scales were iridescent and pretty and shimmery. he had no concept of giving a shit about me finding him beautiful or not. not even on#his mind. simply not something he would think about. now. im sure he'd have some sort of beauty standard to hold himself to for mating if#that had been an option for him. but it wouldnt be the same. idk. i just. i love the idea. of animals that are not traditionally cute or#beautiful or charismatic and the fact that they do not give a single fucking shit what we think of the way they look. BOTH ways. a#a butterfly does not give a single thought tohow beautiful or inspiring you find the colors of its wings. the wolf fish does not care that#humans find it hideous and terrifying. it just looks the way that it does. its fine. its vibing. it just wants to live and survive and get#enough food. yes beauty is everywhere but so is ugly. and there is beauty in ugly. to me. there is beauty in not even thinking about#standards to be conformed to or not. the beauty is irrelevant. its not For You. it doesnt Matter. its just Existing. if you like how it#looks while it exists? great! good for you. if you dont? okay cry about it i guess. this ugly ass fish doesnt give a shit if humans find it#beautiful or not. he was just going to continue to use his lips covered in teeth to scrape biofilm and algae off the surface of rocks and#driftwood and play in the current of the filter.#let girls be ugly the way marine iguanas dont give a shit if humans find them pretty cos theyre just sunning themselves and eating seaweed#off rocks. all humans are beautiful. all humans are ugly. it doesnt matter. let us go dive into the ocean and scrape seaweed off the rocks#and then bask in the sun on a warm rock and not fucking worry about that#anyway also Yes ive seen uglier fish than him.i know they exist. but he was also special cos he was My Fish u see
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i just fucking hate having ptsd all of it. so many stupid fucking things send me into fucking hysterics it sucks and i hate it and i dont want itttt anymore i dont want it.
#i literally like. i didnt tell u guys bc it was embarassing#but i had to hype myself up to eat a fucking orange the other day. like i was shaking and crying and i nearly threw up.#bc it fucking reminded me of All that and also bc its one of the only foods i got to eat outside ofm my one meal a day#while i was living there. bc my coworker gave me oranges sometimes#and one time she gave me a whole bag of cuties which was wonderful of her i miss her#but i pretty much like. bc during m-f i had a meal at work#and i could get something from the vending machine if i needed to#but on the weekends i had to either order food (which would always make me insanely nauseous bc of. the money stuff. yk) or just eat#what i had in my room bc i couldnt use the kitchen bc the roommates would be mad at me#and they might kick me out and id be actually fucked. its so crazy looking back that i genuinely the entire time i fucking lived there even#b4 the breakup the entire time i was in terror that theyd evict me. bc i wouldnt have been able to do anything abt it#i mean thats why i didnt like. leave him after he . and stuff. both bc i thought i didnt deserve anything better and bc i was terrified#theyd evict me and i wouldnt have any way to get home. it was terrifying#but ya. so for a couple weeks i rationed myself One orange per day lol. and on weekends that was all i was able to eat rly#idk. i hate ptsd. basicalllyyyy is the gist of ittt. and i keep thinking abt random fucking things they did to me#me when they jokingly tell me to starve myself when i literally have a fucking eating disorder. and when i told The Only Person i knew in#that fucking house abt it he told me i was being dramatic and i was just being greedy and etc. and then later when i got off work today i#saw on their fucking whiteboard in the kitchen i wasnt supposed to use Eat more <3 as one of their goals. while i went to sit in the garage#for the weekend eating a single fucking orange a day. god#idk. ive gotten better with eating i still have the scale but i ws able to go months without using it until the medical call the other week#and i havent used it since but. everytime i think abt all that itmakes me want to go back to it. i cant tho everyone would notice#i do still eat a wholee lot less than i did b4 washington but idk. idont remember if i even ate today i probably should but i dont feel#hungry but i cant even fucking trust that bc i Starved myself for so fucking long im too good at ignoring hunger. and i never was super in#touch with my body but im constantly numb now. idk.#ed ment#a2t#i ws gonna say more but it ws tmi + tag limit anyway. its just insane that my fucking ed wouldnt have happened if it werent for him and it#graduated i wouldnt have been isolatedinever wouldve had an ed. like 50% of my ptsd would be Gone if i just hadnt joined that discord. lol
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Is it valid to get mad at your significant other for something they didn't do but that you feel could realistically happen or do I need to calm down
#i had a vision this morning where my fiance and i had a kid amd i made dinner for everyone#and the kid didnt like my dinner and i was like okay but you have to eat it i wont make anything else and its good for you#and then (still in the vision) my fiance said 'you dont have to do what she says go microwave a hot pocket'#and the fact that (in the vision) my fiance didnt appreciate the fact that id cooked and contradicted me in front of our (imaginary) kid#made me feel super disrespected and upset lmao#cuz he does sometimes not eat the food i cook!! granted its usually cuz theres something in it he doesnt like but it still hurts#like you could at least say 'looks good but mushrooms make me gag so im gonna have pizza' yknow??#i also read a very long comic last night about unequal division of labor in homes and household management#and just all the ways that (usually) men dont even realize their (usually) wife keeps the house together with like preventative care#and i tried to get my fiance to read it but he gave up after a couple of panels cuz he thought i was accusing him of smth :(#im gonna try again when he didnt just get off a shift where he had to clean up a dead body i think#anyways hope nobody read all that i love my fiance and he tries#its just hard to get him to understand why i get frustrated sometimes#amd it goes both ways im not faultless either#we try :')
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