#no one wants to get married for tax benefits and also because you're a little in love with your best friend anymore!

[watery-melon-baller]

theres people who only have one ship and people who don't have any ships and multishippers well im inventing a new kind of shipper and it's "all of these people are gay and a little in love with each other but the romance is up to interpretation"

[ramen8008]

Okay so.... how's Kaz gonna propose. Because I am sure that no matter how much Inej wants to she will 100% make sure it's Kaz who proposes. Because that's how she was raised and she won't let anything the world threw at her from thinking she deserves any less.

But like...

Kaz: so I have a... proposition for you. This benefits both of us I mean there's tax benefits and all and I believe that if you say yes to this it will...uh be very... favourable to you.

Jesper: .... You know you are practicing for a proposal right?

Wylan: This is a marriage proposal right?

Kaz: yes.

*Nina in the corner shaking from trying not to laugh.*

Wylan: Maybe try being a little more....I don't know...direct?

Kaz: I am always direct.

Wylan: why can't he simply just say "will you marry me?" And we can give him some sweet little speech to memorize

Jesper: No we can't do that. Inej will know he's simply reading off a script. She needs a proposal that comes from Kaz

Nina dying in the corner holding back her laughter.

Jesper: okay try being really straight forward...ask her in one sentence maybe?

Kaz: will you sign this legal bond between us tha-

Jesper: wait right stop there.

Wylan: just ask the question and be more... enthusiastic

Kaz: will you sign this legal bond between us tha-

Jesper: Okay stop right there. We can make this work

Wylan: Yes try being more...happy about it.

Kaz: *stares at Wylan*

Wylan: Nevermind... Saints! He's never gonna get this if he doesn't even try. Do you even want to propose?!?

Kaz: *Glares* Of course I do why else would I even bother being here with you-

Jesper: Okay shut it! Wylan I need a glass of water this is going to take a while. And Kaz do as we say or you're not getting my blessing

Kaz: I don't need your blessing. What are you? Her father?

Jesper: If you really think Inej will marry you without our blessing then you shouldn't even bother proposing

Kaz: *sighs in frustration* fine

Nina, pokes in: yeah he's not getting my blessing

Kaz: What?! Why?!

Nina: I am sorry I might be mistaken but weren't you the one who referred to Inej as your "investment". *Blinks innocently*

Kaz: THAT WAS A LONG TIME AGO!!

Nina: Your fault that you just happen to call the love of your life that, maybe if you weren't such a dense idiot-

Jesper: I said shut it! Nina go back to your corner and Kaz I need you to pay close attention. Make it short and simple where you ask her to marry you and also tell her how much you love and cherish her, alright? Can you do that?

Kaz: *sighs* yeah...

Jesper: okay start!

Kaz: ....

Kaz: I want to-

Jesper: wait...what was that pause at the start

Kaz: well you said to keep it short so I was shortening it.

Jesper: what do you mean "it"

Kaz: I never speak without filtering and around Inej there's too much to filter so I keep it short but since there's so much I want to say sometimes it takes awhile to gather my thoughts.

Jesper: and these things are like what? Compliments?

Kaz:....sort of I guess. More complicated though.

Jesper: YES! THAT'S WHAT YOU SHOULD DO! Tell her all you think about her without filtering or changing anything. Just let your heart speak for itself. Don't think about it

Kaz: What do you mean "don't think about it" that's what I d-

Jesper: that's the problem. You dwell on it too much and don't let yourself be vulnerable but you love Inej right? So what's a better way to show it then be exactly that! Omg I am a genius

Kaz: No, you are an idiot. Why would I want to be vulnerable

Jesper: To show Inej you care! That you are willing to let down you guard for her

Kaz: That's the most stupid thing I've ever heard. I did that once, I spoke without thinking. It was fucking embarrassing

Wylan:*raises an eyebrow* and what happened?

Kaz: ... Shit he's right

Jesper: SEE I was right, the last time you did that you got Inej

Kaz: I still think that's a stupid idea

Nina: and you wonder why it took you so long to get anywhere. You need to show her love and romance but since you dwell so much on your thoughts you treat her like everyone else MEANING you treat her like shit.

Jesper: Shush Nina! Don't say that to him, poor guy just wants to propose.

Wylan: Kaz like you said you have a lot to say about Inej to her that you don't. So when you propose just tell her everything you want her to know. Don't dwell on it or anything just listen to your heart and speak

Nina: yeah like he has a heart. My waffles are capable of more human emotions than him.

Kaz: FINE! WHATEVER I'LL DO IT ON MY OWN!

Jesper: just listen to what Wylan said. We know Inej and as much as you might think otherwise we want this to work.

Nina: I-

Jesper gives Nina a look

Nina: What? I just want Inej to be happy and if it's with him then fine

Kaz: Whatever I'm going

Wylan: Just remember! Let your heart speak and don't think about it!

---------------------------------------------------------

Kaz:*thinking* shit shit shit shit

Inej: *Lands behind him*

Kaz *turns around*: Hello... hi? Hey?

Inej: *amused* ...hey?

Kaz: ...

Inej *smiles*: so why did you call me here?

Kaz: *thinking*: shit she's smiling what do I do

Inej: Kaz?

Kaz: *thinking* shit okay I need to stop thinking, just say anything that comes to mind, okay you can do it

Inej: Kaz? Are you alr-

Kaz: Iloveyou!

Inej: *confused* ...thanks? I love you too. But seriously are you alright Kaz? You look like you're about to pass out.

Kaz: No I'm not. I just need to tell you something

Inej: okay.... I'm listening.

Kaz, deep breathes: okay. Here goes nothing

Kaz: I need to tell you that you are lovely and brave and better than anything I deserved. That I am twisted, crooked, wrong, but not so broken that that I can't pull myself together into some semblance of a man for you. That without meaning to, I'd begun to lean on you, look for you, to need you near. I love your laugh and if I could bottle the sound and get drunk on it every night I would. It terrifies me.

I memorized your favorite flower, favorite song, favorite sweet, just to see you smile. Your smile is one thing I would die to earn again. No saint has ever looked after me...but you have, Inej. I want you, Inej. And I'll have you anyway you want, without gloves, head turn your way so we can kiss. I'll give you myself without armor for you to have.

Please, my darling Inej, treasure of my heart, will you do me the honor of marrying you.

[sweetiewrites]

𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙖𝙗𝙘'𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙝𝙤𝙗𝙞𝙚

𝙎𝙔𝙉𝙊𝙋𝙎𝙄𝙎: the sfw abc's of hobie!

𝙒𝘼𝙍𝙉𝙄𝙉𝙂: mostly just fluff !!! gender neutral reader !!!

𝘼𝙐𝙏𝙃𝙊𝙍𝙎 𝙉𝙊𝙏𝙀: i just decided to answer all of them because uhm uhh i got a lot of asks for them and i dont feel like answering them individually (´ ε ` )♡

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?) hobie is a super affectionate partner. if you two are together he usually wants to have some kind hand on you or arm around you; kisses are literally his weakness. he also shows affection through acts of service so expect him to do literally anything and everything for you.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?) hobie is a great best friend. he's one of the types that says they'll do anything for you and genuinely means it. he would do just about anything for his friends and most of his friendships start because he's at shows causing trouble.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?) oh my goodness hobie is a cuddle monster. he loves cuddling and any time you ask him to cuddle he will happily do so. also he isn't really picky on how you two cuddle, big spoon, little spoon; just touch him please.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?) being a spider person (and a punk star) hobie will never really properly settle down. the closes he gets is more falling into a comfortable routine (and even that's difficult). hobie cooks decently well. it's not the best food you've ever had but he definitely tries. cleaning for him kinda falls off the way side just because he can be pretty busy with life.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?) honest and open conversation. hobie would sit them down and have a conversation with them about it. above all else he appreciates genuineness so there wouldn't be any built up resentment, or miscommunication or anything like that. for a break up it's very not dramatic on his part.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?) hobie feels like marriage isn't needed when you're committed to someone already. he's ready to commit with you, but the only reason he would really want to get married is for tax benefits.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?) despite popular opinion (and appearance); hobie is actually a big gentle giant. physically whenever he holds you it's always very sweet and soft and emotionally he's very in touch with other peoples feelings. unless he doesn't like you then he's pretty soft and sweet.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?) hobie is the best hugger alive. i don't care what anyone says. he gives the best hugs and they're so gentle yet so reassuring. hobie doesn't usually hug his friends it's usually reserved for you (partner) so whenever you want a hug or he's feeling particularly touch starved he's hugging you so much.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?) it takes him a very long time to say it. he has a lot of conflicting feelings on that word and most of his affection is non verbal. so when he finally does say i love you then it's an event that should be celebrated.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?) ehh... hobie is not the jealous type despite popular belief. he's very confident that if someone is flirting with you then you'll tell them to fuck off and he doesn't really compare himself to people.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?) amazing. hobie's kisses are just amazing. each one is filled with passion even if it's just a little peck. his lips are nice and full and that lip ring is perfect. hobie's favourite place to kiss you (besides your lips) would be your neck, he's always planting kisses on your neck. his favourite place to be smooched is his knuckles.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?) we've all seen it. he's great with children. the best uncle/god parent.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?) hobie is not a morning person in the slightest. most of his mornings are spent holding you and listening to the radio (if you have a phone he's watching youtube). he isn't even that interested in breakfast, his appetite doesn't pick up till later in the day around lunch time. morning's are especially lazy.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?) on the other hand, hobie is a night person. if he isn't being spider man than he's usually exploring the city, going to show, putting on shows, making music or working on his own projects on the houseboat. hobie is most active during the night so hopefully you'll stay up with him or at the very least you'll snuggle up to him in the night.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?) hobie drops pieces of lore about himself very randomly. he's not an open book in the slightest so he'll know everything about you long before you know things about him. the key is don't rush him to open up, ask questions if you're interested, and pay attention to what he does say.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?) he doesn't get angry easily at all. there are very few things that will make him angry. usually when he's upset it's because of grander things like the government or society, not usually at individual people. he's a very patient man.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?) hobie remembers everything about you, literally every little detail. he can be quite forgetful, but when it comes to you it sticks to his head like glue.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?) the first time you spent the night on his houseboat. he still remembers you snuggled up to him, your arms latched around his body. he remembers it so vividly because he's never had someone spend the night in his bed before (gwen tried and she promptly got kicked to the couch), but you just fit so naturally into his life that he had no problems sleeping with you.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?) if you're a spider person he isn't too protective but if you're not then he's kinda always on edge around you. hobie attracts trouble and he's well aware of that so he's kinda always ready to fight for you if need be. and hobie doesn't need to be protected but he does feel appreciated when you get a little over protective; it's cute and he feels special.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?) SO MUCH EFFORT. my god, sometimes his date plans are chill but usually since he doesn't want to spend too much money he's doing everything from scratch and he's making the things that need to be made on his own. even if it's just a picnic he's doing his absolute best to make everything absolutely perfect.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?) there are so many. hobie always forgets to do dishes, not to the point where it'll create mold or maggots but he just doesn't remember. if there's a partner that will clean while he cooks or vice versa than it'll balance out.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?) not too vain. he cares about his appearance to the capacity of he wants to look good for himself. his piercings, clothing style, hair, all of it is for himself. also he knows he looks hot.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?) no not necessarily. hobie doesn't believe in people completing each other, you should be whole enough to stand on your own. that isn't to say he wouldn't be incredibly depressed if something happened to you.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.) hobie is so queer coded to me. he chooses not to label himself (obviously), but he would date anyone regardless of gender or sex as long as your morals align.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?) a partner that expects him to change who he is as a person or change his morals, don't try to pressure him into being someone he's not. also loyalty, if you're disloyal that's a huge ick.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?) his sleeping schedule is erratic, but when he's gotten into a rhythm he stays up late and he wakes up late. he likes to hold things when he's sleeping even before he met you so he may have a stuffed animal or two. even though you're not supposed to he loves eating a big meal before he sleeps.

[meekmedea]

for the holidays, and because of majority vote - a Hector and Max 'happy' AU.

Shoutout to Lily @persephoneprice, as I hadn't tried to give them a happy AU until you brought it up

~~~~~

Really sorry to does who love Cleopatra, but in this AU she's dead. So it's just Hector and Endymion (who's like 3-4). Hector does cut down on his trips to 11, because of the risks. He's still funding things in the background. As much as he'd like to treat people there, he doesn't want to run the risk of his son catching anything. And while there's nannies that he could hire, he isn't keen on this idea.

For the first few years, nobody suggests the topic of remarriage to him. Ludius is a scary guy, even if he's 60+. Plus it's obvious Hector is grieving. It's only after his father dies that it starts getting brought up. Hector's still fairly young, and - oh, it'd be terrible for Endymion to lose out on having a second parent around.

Hector is pretty annoyed at this. Like his father had been in a similar situation, he did fine! So why can't I?

There's still some Dovecotes hanging around (cadet branches), and like in our usual universes, they get a bit bold with only Endymion and Hector being left from the main line.

Some possible attempts on Endymion's life might be made.

But one things leads to another, and Hector considers a political marriage. Only to keep his son safe. He vows to not have any more kids though, so to not risk the other child usurping Endymion's position as heir.

`

Except Hector's plan isn't really to get married, it's just to keep people at bay. In a way, it mimics Penelope's challenge to her suitors in the Odyssey.

The challenge: He'll consider marrying whoever can outshoot his father's record, using his father's firearm.

This was definitely said on the impulse.

Slight thing - Ludius' gun was custom, and the bullets are as well. And Hector never said anything about providing the bullets.

Also, they've only got 1 shot at this. No retries.

Hector 'Trust me, it'll work' Dovecote and Maximinius 'This is an awful idea' Ravinstill

Max is 100% paying off people who can shoot fairly well to NOT participate. Or like sabotaging them in the background. Also most people tend to be a little unnerved when the President stares daggers into you. (What can he say, he's just a supportive bestie, making sure nobody is cheating.)

I like to think someone complains that this is a farce and it's impossible. Max jumps to Hector's defence: Don't be ridiculous, you're just peeved that you're unable to accomplish this. See?

He then proceeds to take the shot, it lands. (Don't ask why he had a custom bullet ready for this. Just don't.)

`

They both proceed to have a mini crisis in private.

Hector: You weren't supposed to take the shot!!!

Max: Well they were accusing you of being a liar!!!

Neither man is very composed. And against all odds, it ends with Hector agreeing to marry him. If you thought Max was all suave and sly proposing marriage, you are absolutely wrong. This man was panicking. (ie. errr... tax benefits? please help get my mother off my back about marrying someone?) Hector being "Ok. If I had to be in a marriage of convenience, at least it's with my best friend."

A conversation that probably happened afterwards:

Volumnia: I've never seen someone fail so badly, yet somehow succeed.

Max: The important thing here is that he said 'yes'.

~~~~

The Ravinstill's reactions:

Max's mother, Asteria, has surprisingly less complaints about this than Max initially imagined. Then again this could be due to her odd friendship with Ludius (Hector's father).

Max's brother, Caesar to Hector - "Wow, you're like the brother I never had." / Max: ...

Max's nieces/nephews: they now have to differentiate between Hector and Max. Drusilla says it's 'Uncle President' and 'Uncle Hector'. As the eldest of Max's nieces/nephews, her word becomes law.

Now whenever they see Max, it's: Uncle President!!

this is getting long, probably a part 2 to follow...

[fuckingfinwions]

hallo your au has inspired me to write a short fic of my own c: it's sort of fluff of geode au fingon/sold as pet maedhros. can i have your permission to post this on ao3 at some point?

-

"You want to what?" Fingolfin stared at his eldest as if he grew a second head, momentarily untangling his fingers from Maedhros' curls.

"I– I said I want to marry Maedhros," Fingon repeated.

"That's... Fingon are you– Why??"

A good question. Fingon didn't really know why. He barely understood his growing feelings for Maedhros let alone considered marrying him. He always thought he'd marry someone from a more respectable family not the biggest whore in all of Arda, but the sight of his father's hands all over the elf who showed him so much trust and love in the past few weeks urged a sense of chivalry in Fingon that he thought he was no longer capable of.

"Why does anyone marry anyone? For love, of course."

"Not true, you could always marry someone for politics or even tax benefits. Marrying this harlot will only break your heart."

"Not as much you're breaking mine right now. Maitimo loves me father, if he didn't I think I'd have lived my days not thinking much of him either. But I find that I have become infatuated with him as of late and would like get to know him more outside the bonds of servitude."

Fingolfin studied him as Fingon steeled his gaze, Maedhros the only thing between them shaking like a leaf. He made little effort to stop the king's molestation but it was clear from Maitimo's big wet eyes he still wanted Fingon's approval first. It took all of Fingon not to run to him and embrace him and tell him everything would be okay.

"So be it."

Fingon sighed out air he didn't realize he was holding.

Fingolfin for his part was not entirely convinced of his son's declaration. Sure he has noticed Maedhros had been acting a little strange as of late and he did see the appeal in it but Fingon's attention never stayed in one place too long and he'd probably grow bored of Maedhros' shtick eventually. Fingolfin had other pretty Feanorians to fuck in the meantime.

Besides this might be an opportunity for his reckless son to learn a thing or two about responsibility.

"Try not to damage him Findekano." His father stood and brushed away the crease in his robes just as easily as he shoved Maitimo away. "If he is to be your betrothed I expect him to act like one. You'll feed him, wash him, and teach him all the ways of court. And since you're engaged people need to see that you're actually taking the whole thing seriously, so no fucking anyone else for at least a year. Am I clear?"

"Of course! I'll be the most well-behaved husband in all of Arda!" Fingon promised as Fingolfin left the two newly betrothed alone.

This is amazing! And yes, you can definitely post it on ao3, you wrote it! I'd appreciate it if you link either this blog or my ao3 (also called fuckingfinwions) as inspiring it, and also then I can stop by to leave a comment.

Fingon is so sweet, and yay for sticking up for Maedhros! Not actually consulting Maedhros as an equal partner, but maybe they'll get there in time. And Fingon obviously cares about what makes Maedhros happy, not just jealousy of other people using Maedhros.

Fingolfin doesn't believe that the wedding will actually take place, but I have faith in them! In other timelines Fingon is known for his faithfulness, and he's not going to drop Maedhros once he's made up his mind to keep him. And Maedhros is extremely devoted to Fingon, he's definitely going to be trying to make this engagement work. Maedhros isn't stupid either; he doesn't know how a prince is supposed to behave but he can learn, and if that's what his master fiance wants from him, he'll dedicate just as much energy as he does to any of Fingon's other orders.

(Also, was Fingolfin literally about to get a blowjob from Maedhros when Fingon "proposed"? Am I reading the "crease in his robes" and "untangling his fingers from Maedhros' curls" right? Because that sure is some timing on Fingon's part!)

[forests-creatures]

Me and a friend have been working on food themed friend labels! They're meant for establishing some boundaries and also helping neurodivergent people label their friendships, but also can be used just for fun to see what sort of friendships you have with your friends. The two of us started working on it at first due to us being both neurodivergent, and we both like categorising things XD

∘₊✧────────────────✧₊∘

Tea - Friends that have no filters whatsoever. they don't need to worry about making the other uncomfortable, because they don't really care about oversharing

Water - friends that can always hyper focus on one topic constantly, and it never gets old. they can talk about the same thing for ages, always returning to that conversation and it doesn't get any less interesting or fun

Chilli - Friends that always subtly have each others backs. Its not obvious, but no matter what shenanigans one gets in, the other subtly gets them out of the chaos in ways people often don't notice immediately if at all

Popping candy - like chilli, but its very obvious and is basically "I will beat someone up for you if you needed me to"

Apple seed - friends that shouldn't be friends. usually dubbed by people outside of the friendship, or if one person feels trapped in the friendship and feels that cant escape. very toxic

Cherry - when friends agree that if one forms romantic feelings that aren't returned, it wont get in the way of the friendship. Its like an agreement that it will not ruin the friendship if something forms and doesn't quite bloom

Freezer - can not talk for months or even years, but still get along super well when they talk again as if they didn't have a huge break in between chatting

Wine - been friends for 5+ years

Blueberry - friends who are always there to emotionally support the other if one is going through a tough time. whether through venting, or being the friend to make you your comfort meal and just help cheer you up

Sugar - friends always arguing over who pays for things, because they want to be the one who pays and not let the other pay

Cream - friends with benefits

Cookie - Friends that are chosen family, or you have familial like bonds with! Whether there's that one friend who is like a mum to everyone, or the two of you are like siblings

Passion fruit - Friends who would marry each other for tax benefits

∘₊✧────────────────✧₊∘

Little explanations for the names:

Tea - Can be made without a filter unlike coffee Water - something everyone should ideally have everyday. It cannot get old simply because our bodies need it Chilli - has very strong flavours, but people who are not eating it may not notice how many sensations it is causing Popping candy - other people do notice you're eating it because of the popping noises. Also it's a very loud food Apple seed - Apple seeds are poisonous to eat! Cherry - not too sure, just fit well and was is fruity Freezer - The friendship has been perfectly preserved and has been defrosted Wine - the friendship ages like fine wine Blueberry - Because one friend is feeling rather blue when this friendship becomes obvious Sugar - A bit like sugar daddies, but with friends and there's nothing being asked for in return, it's just two people arguing over who pays Cream - need i say more? Cookie - Cookies are a rather sweet and comforting food Passion fruit - The name just oddly fitted this one

∘₊✧────────────────✧₊∘

Feel free to suggest your own!! I would love to see what sort of friends you guys come up with :D

[resetting37]

World Building Wednesday: Marriages and Weddings in Evelow

Hi and welcome to worldbuilding wednesday ! A brand new segment I'm coming up with because I want to share more oc lore, in this case, specific to their setting. the setting of RESETTING that is....

So I take inspiration from other fantasy interpretations of marriage. But also I don't stray away from mainstream versions.

If you're a normal standard civilian in Evelow, you get married because you want to (love 💕). There are some societal benefits, such as being granted bigger living quarters when applying for relocation. (Although this also applies to families, whether parents are married or not.) There are also tax benefits, etc. (Yes, taxes exist in Evelow. I'm not a financial or government expert, but I think they have to.) Polyamorous marriages are accepted too. However, one has to specify in documents who in the relationship they're married to. If you don't care about documental proof, then it doesn't matter though.

In ruling houses, however, marriage can be used for political power or for growing your family, therefore potential legacy. Ruling houses include the senate, district heads, judges, the council, and the empress. Evelow is such a powerful civilization, even houses from outside the city will travel to offer their hand in marriage to an influential Evelonian.

The Empress and the council are the most sought after positions, which is why it's not common, or even "encouraged" for a councilman to marry another. This is seen as combining the two families, thus, leaving a seat available** (so maybe this form of marriage is great for someone to grab a seat in the council, which is otherwise mostly inherited from one person to another.)

Marriages are arranged more so in other ruling houses, such as senators seeking alliances. Arranged marriage isn't the end-all though, as many leading houses still marry for love*** and people still seek out concubines despite their marriage.

•

I have less to say about weddings. They're not required in Evelow, although there is usually a ceremony. There's no one way to have a wedding, much like it is in our world, but unlike our world, it is very much encouraged for everyone to dress their best. Don't worry about out-dressing the celebrants.**** It's their problem if they didn't dress their best lol. But again, every wedding is different, so if the ceremony asks their guests to make their way to the temple at 10pm and wear all red, then be respectful !

•

Again, I hope you liked my little story talk, and thanks for reading this :-)

** An in-story example would be councilmen Crystal Camryn 5.0 and Kenzo Yamazaki agreeing to marry off their children. Many peers, including Atlas Vespira, saw this as asinine, however, Crystal and Kenzo argued that because it was their second born children, no seats would be available and this marriage was rather an alliance for the Camryns and Yamazakis. Something Atlas then viewed as a threat !

*** I don't have many ocs that are canonically married, but one example of this is Samson Hadler, a son of a councilman who has three spouses because he loves them all :-)

**** look, I couldn't find a good gender-neutral word for bride and groom. 'Couple' kind of disregards everything I said about polyamorous relationships and 'marrier' does not roll off the tongue well at all. So we're sticking with 'celebrants.'

[ace-and-slutty]

11, 36, 47, 48, 53

I'm so sorry for the slight delay! Classes just started in earnest and I'm still figuring out how to juggle them both haha!

11. I just paused underworld blues by the mechanisms to answer this ask without getting distracted!

36. My top three dreams are pretty cliche haha, but I'm writer so I'd LOVE something of mine to be published one day!! And I hope one day that one of my plays make it to Broadway. I also want to get married one day. Definitely not a big or expensive thing and at least partially for the tax benefits lol but I do really want it. I want someone in my life that means that much to me and that I mean that much to them.

47. I am such a basic bitch but most people don't see much beauty in my body so if you do I am immediately wet for you. I also really like it if you're taller than me because I've always felt Too Big and it's been a huge insecurity of mine so getting to feel small? I MELT for that. I also love feeling like I've pleased someone or that I've been good for them and I am a SLUT for being marked up. I want to be able to look at my body and see that someone has marked me as theirs in some small way, that I have that connection with them especially if I won't see them again for a while. Also if you praise me a little bit? I am essentially at your disposal haha

48. INTERUPTING ME OH MY GOD. And like if we're both excited, that's one thing! But if you have no interest in me outside of what's between my legs? You're not getting between them sorry. General asshole-ry of course, if we're on a date and you're rude to our server? That's an automatic nope. Same if you don't like animals. Also, phrasing this as nicely as i possibly can, I personally find ageplay really really off-putting and honestly some of the writing is SO CRINGEY holy fuck. Baby talk is NOT SEXY OH MY GOD. also if you have tagged something r4pecock? That's so fucking stupid. Like cnc is totally valid and I'm even into it to an extent. But I can't take you seriously when you write like that.

53. Top one is definitely my cat Antigone!! She features in several of my nudes because she's nosey as fuck and I love her SO much. Second, another basic choice but I have a really lovely family and some really good friends (one friend stayed with me in the hospital for TEN HOURS holy shit). Third is carbs my beloved. Especially pasta I mean have you had pasta??? Al dente texture makes the Autism brain go happy brrrrr. Fourth is writers because novels AND podcast AND fanfic have gotten me through some really really rough times. They've all really helped so i don't want to limit it to one kind. And lastly is this blog! I'm trying to rebuild my confidence in my body after a couple of things kinda shattered it and believe me when I say I cherish every friend I have made, every kind word, every post celebrating bodies out of the norm like mine, it means the world.

Thank you so much for the ask!

[imagining-in-the-margins]

CM Wedding Fic Challenge

The following are prompts including a wedding or proposal! Reader or OC fics AND Character/Character ships are allowed!

This event is over (Masterlist of Fics here), but you are welcome to use any of these prompts. If you would like to be added to the existing Masterlist of entries, please check out the Rules below!

Open Prompts

There is a wardrobe malfunction the day of the wedding.

Explain why the couple is late to their own wedding.

It's a little unconventional to meet the family at the wedding, but the couple just couldn't wait any longer.

The team finds out about the wedding five minutes before it happens. Possibly less. They've gotta literally run to the courthouse if they're going to make it.

Four members of the team come forward to offer something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.

Everything goes wrong and Character A is convinced that its ruined. Character B reminds them they only need one thing for their wedding to be perfect - each other.

After a crazy night out in Vegas, the couple wakes up with ring pops on their fingers and a certificate that proves the impossible.

Character A catches the bouquet... and tosses it to Character B. Does that count as a proposal?

Character A asks Character B's child's permission to marry their parent.

Character A could not have picked a worse time to propose to Character B.

Always the bridesmaid/groomsmen, never the bride/groom.

Character A falls head over heels for Character B, who is the adult entertainment at their best friend's bachelor(ette) party.

This is a marriage of convenience, but one of them really wants a wedding. They fall in love during the planning.

The couple discusses the moment they realized they wanted to marry one another.

Character A keeps trying to propose at the perfect moment, but keeps getting interrupted.

The team was already suspicous about their "friendship" but really didn't expect them to come back from a long weekend with matching rings.

Character A is very nervous about marriage to Character B because they never really had a positive example as a child.

Dialogue Prompts

"Is the (gun) holster really necessary? On our wedding day?"

"Are you asking me to marry you?" "Very poorly, yes."

"I don't think that's what they meant by a shotgun wedding."

"You're getting married? Why?" "For the tax benefits, mostly."

“Speak now or forever hold your peace.”

“Sorry, I must have misheard. I thought you just asked me to marry you.”

“This was not what I envisioned when I was a kid. It’s much better.”

Character Specific Prompts

[Tara] Tara's nervous about marriage after a divorce and a broken engagement, but seeing how well Rossi's *fourth* marriage seems to be working out for him has changed her mind.

[Hotch] Jack is the ringbearer and he informs the bride/groom that he’s lost the ring… a couple hours before the wedding.

[Spencer] He has the same dream he had before with Maeve. But this time, when he lifts the veil, he has no doubts.

[Spencer] The team thought he was visiting his mom in Las Vegas, so they weren’t expecting him to come back with a spouse.

[Spencer or JJ] A rewrite/expansion of the aftermath of Truth or Dare at Rossi’s wedding.

[JJ] She says goodbye before she makes the decision to marry Will.

AU Prompts

[Victorian/Royalty AU] Characters A and B are in an arranged marriage and meet for the first time on their wedding day.

[Soulmate AU] Characters A and B are soulmates. Character A is a romantic who wants to be wooed. Character B doesn't understand why they should have to do that if they're soulmates.

[Fairy AU] Character A thought they were clever enough to deal with fairies. Then they accidentally married one.

Rules

The fic can be a Reader insert, or a character/character ship. It can feature any Criminal Minds character.

Tag me in the fic, or send it to me in a Direct Message. It can be already written, or you can write it just for the challenge - I’m collecting both! You can also tag it “#mentioningmargins” which is a tag I track.

The fic can be any genre, but ONLY send me smut if your bio states you are 18+. I DO NOT WANT smut written by minors. Ever. At all. I will check. Platonic ships and pure, fluffy fics are 100% allowed.

Please include Content Warnings and a one-sentence Summary of the fic in your post.

Have fun!

[thoughts-of-a-trying-tree]

marry me

word count: 2712

warning(s): references to fics i've never written, cursing, dialogue heavy, and my brand of self-indulgence (also the word uwu is said. im so sorry)

Read on AO3

-----------------------------------------------

"Peach, toss me the wrench, would you?" Clang! "Thanks, and also the—" Clang! "Oh, yep, that's better actually." Bzzzzzzzt. "Perfect, marry me." Thwack! "I meant thank you!"

'*'*'*'

"Harleyyyy! HAAARLEEEEEYYYY!"

"What? Where's the invasion?" Slap!

"Pick your stupid fuckin' socks up! Tits and their respective gods, I have to do everything around here and there ain't no pay in New York Cit-ay."

"You could always marry me for tax benefits if you're that worried—"

"And pick your stuff up for the rest of my life? I would rather eat my shirt. Better not see anything in the lab!"

"Mhm."

"..."

"…"

Wham! "Harley Fuckin' Keener, why did you leave YOUR socks on MY stuff? Stop laughing!"

'*'*'*'

"Babe. Fox News thinks we're married."

"Fox News? Hell the why?"

"We are, ahem, and this is beautifully written, 'promoting an ideal of relationship that does not prioritize the continuation of the human race nor its wellbeing and,' get this, 'are worse than the aliens invading New York.'"

"I thought they agreed not to call them that, now that we have so many extraterrestrials on Earth? 'Cause it's offensive, right?"

"Is that really the first question you have? Not even the implication that our marriage would be worse than the Chitauri?"

"I mean, I'm down if you're down, peach."

"Down bad? Down under?"

"Why not both? Ahem! Peter Middle Name Parker—"

"Everyone knows my middle name, get off the floor—"

"—will you make me the most horribly selfish man in the world—" Sniff. "—and marry me?"

"Oh my God. You're ridiculous. Get off the floor."

"Is that a yes?"

"I would rather marry DUM-E for their intelligence."

"Hey!"

'*'*'*'

"So I've been thinking—"

"Should I call an ambulance?"

"Omigod, you're so funny aha, marry me uwu—"

"Alright, get on with it."

"I've been thinking—stop it—I was thinking—"

"Spit it out!"

"You won't let me!"

"Fine, I'll shut up."

"I've been. Thinking."

"...And? Go on?"

"…"

"…"

"I forgot!" Snicker.

"No. For real?"

"Yeah! Fuck you!"

"Please, that's the most you thing ever!"

"It's all your fault!" Whack! "If you had just shut up!" Whack! "This wouldn't!" Whack! "Have happened!"

'*'*'*'

"So when are you two getting married?"

"Haha! Can't say we have plans for that, huh Harls?"

"Ha, no, guess we can't! I mean, would you marry me, Peter Parker?"

"Haha, don't be so funny, Harls! Maybe after we've finished all the restoration work we can answer silly questions about our personal lives that no one should have an investment in, right Harley?"

"Yeah. I was expecting a little better, Peter." Click-click-click-click shhhh.

"T-that's a wrap! Thank you Peter Parker and Harley Keener for coming to represent the Stark Relief Fund and Stark Industries! Stay tuned for an interview with Shuri on behalf of King T'Challa of Wakanda after the break!"

'*'*'*'

"The charity ball has us down as Harley and Peter Parker."

"Oh, that's good. One thing off the list. Pass me the fluid, please?" Clink. "Thanks."

"No, they have us down as Harley and Peter Parker."

"Yeah? What's wrong?"

"They have us down as a couple. As in Harley Parker and Peter Parker."

"Your name sounds so weird with mine."

"Rude and not even the point, peach."

"No, I mean like. Different." Whirrrrrrrrr click! "As if you'd take my name anyway."

"Hey! I don't have that big of an ego. Besides, would you take mine?"

"Sure, I guess. It's my first name that matters, right?"

"Nah, because I wouldn't want to ruin your little alliteration. Was that what you were going for when you picked Peter anyway?"

"Shut up."

"Wait, actually? Ow! For real? Ack! Why is that such a transgender and you thing to do, you absolute idiot, OW, marry me!"

"Too late babe, according to the guest list, we've been there, done that."

"Mhm, but if we don't want to ruin the alliteration, we can't do a hyphenated name either, so maybe we could combine them or something? Like... Pareener?"

"Ew. That sounds like a vacuum brand."

"Parkner?"

"Why are we even having this conversation?"

"Uh. Hm. Oh! Charity ball, cross it off the list."

"Right. What else is on the list?"

"Our wedding—"

"Don't annoy a man with a scalpel in his hand!"

"Why the FUCK do you have a scalpel?"

"Tinkerin' the toys, honey."

"Fingerin' the—Ow!"

'*'*'*'

Peter stood like a bird on a branch, shaking and yet, perfectly still. Watching Harley walk towards him had eased the beating of his heart, but now it was swelling and pulling him into the sky with it, though through anxiety or elation, only time would tell. He drew in a breath and willed himself to stay still. Harley took his hands in his and stared into Peter's eyes, beaming.

An excited voice. "Do you, Peter Benjiman Parker—" Ned crashed into Peter from behind.

"Dude! There's this ginormous hologram of you in the middle of the floor!"

"Ned, you fucking stole my thunder!" Harry groaned, throwing an arm over Harley's shoulders. "Pause and rewind. Do you, Peter, have a clue of how big these people think you are? Well, my friend, allow me to show you!" Harry grabbed Peter's elbow and steered everyone through the legs of a white A in the colossal STARK EXPO sign in front of the tower. Peter found Harley's hand again as he ducked through, and immediately tightened his grip as he made eye contact with a giant hologram. Of himself.

"Holy fuckin' shit. I'm huge." Harley snickered.

"For once, you're taller than me." Peter shoved him, laughing.

"I'm not done growing! And FYI, tall people are assholes so—"

"Peter!" Tony Stark jogged towards him, flashes of light trailing behind him.

"Mr. Stark!"

"How are you feeling?"

"Like I just choked on the world. But I think I'm ready."

"Good, because Harley can do the Heimlich, and you're up in ten."

"My cans–?"

"Behind the forehead section of the audience. Get 'em, kid."

"Will do, Mr. Stark." Harley took both of his hands again and Peter turned to face him.

"You got this. You've practiced your ass off and planned out a show like no one's ever seen." Peter resisted the urge to laugh. If only he knew. "You're amazing. You're gonna do amazing."

"Thanks Harls."

"I love you, peach."

"Love you, too."

"Now go show this crowd what they're been missing out on." Peter pressed his lips quickly to Harley's and practically skipped to the backstage area, which was really more underneath the stage.

Time passed like frozen honey until, finally, someone called his name. "Peter Parker, up now." He walked up the coordinator, who smiled down at him. "Good luck, honey."

"Thank you."

He shook out his hands, channeled his inner Tony, and ran up onto the stage, grinning wide like he didn't have a care in the world. His heart raced at the size of the crowd as it cheered for him, and his eyes landed on Harley. He nodded at him, and Peter slid to a stop center stage.

"Hello, New York!" The crowd screamed louder, and Peter took his cue. He pressed a button on his earbud, and small black dots rushed out of the blue cans in the back of the room. The crowd went silent before bursting into confusion. The dots raced between their feet and hopped over their shoes, some breaking off their streams and crawling to the ceiling and covering the chandelier. The dots on the ground gathered around Peter, and then came together and formed a hand.

The chandelier flashed red and blue. The dots fell off like raindrops and connected with the hand on stage, revealing that the chandelier was now in a completely different design, and the crowd gasped. Peter wiggled his fingers at the crowd, and the hand on stage followed suit.

"Hello, New York," he called again. "I'm here today for three different reasons. The first?" He grinned, almost wolf-like. "I think the tower needs some renovating, don't you?" The dots making the hand – microbots, now everyone could tell – fell in a crash and surged to the wall near the stage, forming a black box across it.

Everything went still.

Then they fell through the metal and plaster, revealing empty space, and the microbots moved through seemingly nothing – until they moved farther out and left new floors, ceilings, and walls in their wake.

"Welcome to the new addition to the Stark Tower. Would anyone like a tour?"

It all went perfectly. Rooms Peter described appeared in front of astonished eyes in seconds, before the black mass moved on ahead of them. The separate rooms were furnished, and refurnished as Peter playfully designed them, and he explained on the tour what the bots were.

"3D printers. Armed with magic – although a friend would say that on Asgard, magic and science are one and the same – and Wakandan technology. Combined, they form a future we never thought possible. Skyscrapers built in minutes without error or human endangerment. Imagine a world where your dream house is exactly how you imagine it. Imagine a world where renovations take the time it takes you to have a cup of tea."

By now, the crowd and Peter were near the end of the new wing. The bots were finishing up the last wall, the dead end, and Peter turned his back to it.

"I told you I had three reasons for being here. This is one. A new way to build, with lower cost both monetarily and in a human sense. These little guys will be released within six months, with this wing as their final test." The bots had finished and were now forming different animal shapes and moving through the crowd, delighting them with shapeshifting. A little spider rested on Harley's shoulder. "But what's the point of a new wing with nothing to use it for?"

A few of the bot-animals scrambled back to the dead end and shifted through random letters of the alphabet. "That brings me to my second reason." He hesitated dramatically, enjoying the awe of the audience. "Ladies and gentlemen, you are here to witness the launch of the next generation of Stark Expo." The bots fell back and revealed gleaming letters on the wall.

STARK EXPO: UNRESTRICTED

"The Stark Expo has been limiting to young people, people of color, people who don't have the resources for innovation, and more. That changes today." He paused, giving the audience a moment to take everything in.

"Stark Expo: Unrestricted is a unique mix of a nonprofit scholarship program, internship, and expo for anyone who has something to show. Those in New York can apply online at SEUnrestricted at no cost and with no requirements. No restrictions."

"Those outside of New York have an application process also at no cost, in which an essay, the details of which are on all sites connected to Stark-owned organizations, should be submitted. Those chosen will not have to pay a penny to receive the resources of Stark Industries or, if wanted, to come to New York and work side-by-side with the best."

The bots melted back into streams and formed a cruise ship next to him. "It's an all-expenses-paid trip and we can make it happen. Who wants in?" The crowd burst into a shock of loud applause and Peter grinned wildly, letting it die down as the all the bot creations separated and slowly returned to their cans. All but one. His eyes landed on Tony, who cupped his hands around his mouth.

"What's the third thing, Peter?" He yelled. Peter laughed.

"So glad you asked, random citizen!" He took a deep breath. "I couldn't have done all of this alone. Through breakdowns at three a.m. over miniscule details and hours on end locked in the lab with me as I spent all my time not paying attention to anything but these bots, I've never been alone." He started making his way into the crowd, which parted around him.

"As I enter this next chapter in my life, everything will change. But there are some things I hope never do, and so this last reason may be the scariest of all." Peter stopped in front of Harley, and the spider hopped down from his shoulder and formed a thick, spinning O in Peter's hand.

He sank to one knee and Harley took a step back, eyes wide.

"Harley Keener. I never want you to change. I never want to go anywhere or do anything without you. Through the past few years of my life, you have been the brightest point." Peter had a whole script but he could barely remember the words now. "You've asked me this before as a joke, but I've never asked you, and—" He fumbled, nearly tipping over. "God, this is not easy." A couple in the crowd glanced at each other, and the crowd rustled with mirth.

"Harley Keener, I love you with my whole heart and all of my life." The formerly spider bots stopped spinning and skittered into Peter's sleeves, revealing a ring with blue and red stones set into the top of a band with the tell-tale gleam of vibranium.

"Harley Keener—"

"Yes—"

"Let me finish!" The crowd laughed, but neither boy noticed.

"Harley Keener." He was nodding, tears sliding down his cheeks. "Will you make me the most horribly selfish man in the world– " Harley choked out a wet laugh. "–and marry me?"

Harley fell to his knees and pressed his face into Peter's, planting kisses where his tear-streaked face could reach. "Yes, you absolute idiot, I will, I will, I will—" He broke off to kiss him again, and Peter's eyes sparkled with wetness.

"You didn't even put on the ring, Harls," he whispered through kisses.

"Oh!" Harley pulled back and held his hand out, and Peter slid the ring onto his finger. Harley stared for a moment, then looked up at him.

"Do you... like it? Because I tried to find a normal one but I didn't think you'd like any so I thought I could make it and—" Harley interrupted him with a hard kiss.

"I love it. I love you." Peter laughed wetly.

"Okay."

"Okay." The crowd cheered again behind them, and Tony and a few Avengers all started ushering them away. Once the room had cleared, Harry, Ned, and MJ ran in, Ned squealing.

Harley laughed and got off the floor, pulling Peter up with him and picking him up bridal-style.

"You guys knew?" Harley went ignored through all the excitement.

"Peter!" Ned yelled. "You're engaged! To Harley!"

"Yeah!" Peter laughed and curled up into Harley more. He kissed Peter's forehead.

"No," MJ groaned. "You guys are gonna be even grosser than before!" Harry pretended to flick a tear from his eye.

"It's like watching my babies grow up, so sweet." MJ punched Harry's arm, and Ned awkwardly hugged them both.

"I'm so happy for you guys," he sniffed.

"Ned, are you crying?"

"No, it's just allergies, don't worry!" Everyone laughed, and Peter leaned up to kiss Harley.

"We're engaged," he whispered.

"Hell yeah."

'*'*'*'

In the end, it was a small party. Abby was the maid of honor, and Morgan the flower girl. May sat with Tony and Rhodey, and Bucky and Steve were guardian angels, keeping the reporters away and staying within six feet of the happy couple for anything they needed. Thin strips of peaches decorated the top of the cake and, if you looked carefully, seemed to form a spider web and Hello Kitty whiskers. Coincidence, of course.

May cried her eyes out and pretended she hadn't, and Pepper made sure everything went smoothly. Harry, Ned, and MJ sat first row, and if Ned and May were in a competition over who cried the most, the judge would've started sobbing in sympathy.

Harley and Peter had whispered their vows to each other, low and soft so not even Steve with his super hearing could understand them. They were riddled with inside jokes, cracking the other up, and each word was said with such love that both of their hearts felt full afterwards.

"How are you feeling, peach?" The first dance.

"Like I'm holding the world." Inexplicably new.

"I'm holding my world." Inextricably linked.

"And I'm holding mine."

And that love would last forever.

[maira-writes-shit]

Salt, saltier, Yahaba and Shirabu

Haikyuu Yahaba Shigeru and Shirabu Kenjirou friendship

Fluff, mild angst, Yahashira childhood friends

Yahaba and Shirabu met when they were 8.Some may ask: How did that happen? Well this is the story:

Both of them had been dragged to a business dinner by their parents...

Shigeru’s parents were business people. That’s just what they were.Everything they did, they did it for business.

They got married for tax benefits and to combine their companies. Sure they did love each other but that wasn’t the main reason they got married.

They got children for image. They used them to seem closer to the „average family“, to try and seem more trust worthy and kind.

So that’s what he was here for.“And this is our son Shigeru.“,his mother said with a fake smile on her thin lips. She was talking to a small woman with copper hair. Something suddenly moved behind her legs and Yahaba tried to get a glance.

The woman took a step back and a boy with the same copper hair as the woman became visible.

He was a little bit shorter than Shigeru, had chocolate brown eyes and a pale complexion.

“Well this is Kenjirou!“, Shigeru’s mother put out her hand, she had to crouch down a little do to her wearing the heels that her son always wonder how she could even walk in, the boy -Kenjirou- took her hand and nodded to her.

The two women walked away chatting with equally fake smiles and cheerful voices, leaving their sons on their own.

The awkward silence between stretched out for multiple minutes until Kenjirou sighed.

“I’m Kenjirou Shirabu...“

“Well I know that.“, Shigeru whispered looking away.

“Hey jerk! I’m trying to talk to you!“ „Well you're not succeeding!“ „You’re talking to me, right?!“

Shigeru opened his mouth but shut it again.

He was right

The taller pouted.

“Why are you like this?“

“I’m trying to not fuck this up for my parents.“ at that Shigeru looked up at Kenjirou.

„What do you mean?“ „We just moved here and my dad says he needs friends under the other higher ups...“...“I’m Shigeru Yahaba. You’re the first other kid I’ve seen here.“

“Really?“ „Yeah. I only come along for the image.“„Well I guess we will probably have to cross paths a few more times so-“, Kenjirou extended a hand with a sly look on his face „-We should probably get along.“

Start

They were 11.

They had ended up on the same middle school.

Easy to say:The teachers both hated and loved them.

Both were smart and talented people and they knew it. And they abused it.

They didn’t pay attention in class and would always make snarky remarks only loud enough for each other to hear because they knew they could keep up.

Fun

They were 12.

“You know...I think I wanna join the volleyball club.“

Kenjirou looked up from his homework a bit startled.

“Huh?“ „I mean every time we play in gym class I just have so much fun and it makes me feel good! You know?“

Do I know? Yes I do know.

“I feel like I have the control yet at the same time I can play in a team!“

“I want to join too!“ „Really?!“ „Yeah! We can play together!“

Friendship

They were 14.

Sweat was dripping down Shigeru’s face.

24:23 for the other team...it seems useless...

The silver haired boy turns his face to his best friend.

I can’t do it. It’s too much.

Those thoughts wash away as soon as he sees him.

He was determined.

That’s what he admired the most about Kenjirou...he didn’t give up.

Shigeru was weak alone. All it took was a B on a test to send him spiraling but Kenjirou was always there.Kenjirou was his setter and Shigeru was his spiker.

They were feared for being able to know exactly what the other was thinking.

They were a threat.

Shigeru couldn’t do it on his own...but he wasn’t on his own.

Kenjirou was there and he was looking at Shigeru with that look of determination that always made him go though with all the shit they thought of.

They won.

Determination

They were 14.

This wasn’t normal.

He shouldn’t feel like this.

But he did.

Chikara Ennoshita.

The brown haired boy had been his and Shigeru’s friend since the start of middle school. He was smart, determined, kind and he was able to handle the combined salt level of both Shigeru and Kenjirou.

He had been his first real friend after Shigeru.

And now here he was...having a crush on him.

That’s all it was though: a crush. Still...he was a guy...This wasn’t right.

“Kenjirou? You ok?“

The copper haired boy jumped a bit at his best friends voice. He looked up and-“Shigeru I think im gay-“

Why did I say that? I never planned on telling anyone! Let alone Shigeru...what will he think of me now-?

“Same.“

“Wait what?“

“Well I’m not completely gay- I do also like girls...so bi? Maybe even pan or something...I don’t know yet.“

„Wait you aren’t surprised?“ „Shirababe...nothing about you staring at Chikas ass is subtle. Turn the horny down child!“ „I AM OLDER THAN YOU!“

“NO YOURE NOT! WELL AT LEAST NOT MENTALLY!“, Shigeru threw a pillow into Kenjirou‘s face.

The shorter got hit right in the face and let out a dramatic gasp while throwing the pillow right back.

“STOP WITH YOUR MENTAL SHIT, ASSHOLE!“

Acceptance

They were almost 16.

“Wait what?“

“I said I’m going to apply for Shiratorizawa.“

“But-we said we would got to Seijoh together!“

“Well there is still the possibility of me failing the exam because we both know I won’t get a sports scholarship.“

“Oh who are you kidding!? You are going to pass that exam with flying colors!“

“Well thank you.“

„KENJIROU YOU PROMISED!“

“I WAS LIKE 13!“

“YOU SAID- You said you won’t leave me alone...“

“Oh boo hoo! Little baby Yahaba can’t take being alone!“

Yahaba? He had never called me that...

“Well that may have to do with the fact that you always need to show me that your better than me in everything, Shirabu!“They stared each other down.

Sure they had had fights over the years but nothing quite like this.

There was so much to lose.

But also so much to gain.

I can’t do it. It’s too much.

Shigeru walked away.

Fear

They were 16.

Kenjirou had made it to Shiratorizawa.

He looked down at his test results with a grain of salt though.

He had passed with flying colors...just like he had said...

They hadn’t talked since their fight. They had graduated without a word to each other and now they were separated.

Shigeru got his test scores back some time ago, he would go to Seijoh after summer break.

Ennoshita would go to a different school as well.

Kenjirou‘s Heart hurt a bit at That thought as well. Not only was Chikara his only other real friend but Kenjirou also still had his stupid crush on him.

Kenjirou Shirabu was sitting in his room alone.

He was alone.

He had forgotten what that felt like.

Ever since that faithful day 8 years ago Shigeru- no Yahaba- had always been there somehow. Kenjirou had always seen him or texted him in some way and even when they were fighting he would always have Chikara to talk to.

But now both of them were gone.

Empty

They were 16.

Everything reminded them that the other wasn’t there.

It hurt.It hurt worse than when Yahaba got rejected by the girl he liked.

It hurt worse than Shirabu being beaten in his favorite subject.

It hurt more than the punches exchanged when they fought over something so seemingly little now that they forgot what it was.

How do you feel after the person you spent half your life with leaves?

Broken

Lost

Alone

They were 16.

„Yaha-Chan we Are playing a practice match today and I want to put you in.“

The dyed brown haired teen turned around a bit startled.

“But Oikawa-san I’m not even that good! I just started really playing this position! I can’t possibly-“ „Trust yourself more Yaha-chan!“

Yeah as if that’s so easy...Kenjirou was my setter and I was his spiker...I honestly just wanted to try this position but-

“I can see you overthinking Yaha-chan!“, Shigeru’s senpai snapped him out of his spiraling thoughts.

„You are a great setter Yahaba. Don’t forget that.“

The younger looked up from the ground.Instead of the usual sing songy voice of Oikawa those words were said with a kind yet very stern voice.

He cracked a little smile.

Change

They were 16.

Winning.

That was what he did all of this for.

Winning.

So this was being part of a real team, huh?

He only stood on the court for a few minutes but here he was...screaming, laughing and hugging his teammates.

The last time I was this happy I was with Shigeru-

The copper haired boy turned around to the other side of the net.

There he was.

Yahaba Shigeru was crouching over a third year crying on the floor.He went around giving everyone water bottles.

He hadn’t played.

He had sat on the bench observing and filling up water bottles.

Anger rose in Kenjirou. How could they not let him play? There was definitely more than one of the third year spikers that was way worse than Shigeru!

Why won’t they let him play?

Or did he choose to not play?

Did they think they could win against Shiratorizawa and then use him as a secret weapon?

What was up with him?

He was slapped on the back by his senpai, their setter Semi Eita.

One eye contact was all Semi need to check up on him...

One eye contact and he could feel himself falling.

He wanted to tell Shigeru.

Longing

They were 16.

Loss.

That was the worst part about this.

Losing.Shigeru was on his bed looking up at the ceiling, like he and Kenjirou used to do when they told story’s till 2am.

His phone pinged.

Bangsie:

“Heh“, Shigeru smiled. He had forgotten to reset the nickname.

What does he want though? Rub his win under my nose? Tell me how much better than me he is again?

He picked up his phone anyways.

Bangsie: Shigeru we need to talk...same place

Same place.

Shigeru knew what he meant by that.

When his older brother was younger their parents had bought him a little treehouse at the outskirts of the woods not far from the Shirabu residents.

They would go there when Shigeru‘s little brother was being noisy, they wanted to get away or they just didn’t feel safe enough at home.

The Fake brunette sighed and put on his shoes.

Fixing

They were 16.

He came.

They sat in silence.

Until The copper haired boy broke the silence: „I’m sorry.“

„I know I made a promise and I knew what it meant to you but-“„No no I get it! Shiratorizawa fits your needs as a person and for your future more...I was being selfish.“

“But you had all right to be! Your brother left you behind and he was the only one there for you, I did the same!“

“Don’t fucking blame yourself for my problems!“

They stared at each other down for a good minute until they broke and they ended up hugging and crying.

The next hours were spent catching up.

Shigeru learned about Kenjirou’s crush on his upperclassman Semi.

Kenjirou learned about a guy named Kyoutani that absolutely drove Shigeru crazy and now even quit.

He also learned that Shigeru had switched to being a setter.

The night ended like many nights in the treehouse ended: with them curled up in blankets falling asleep on each other.

Home

They were 17.

I need to get better. I need to work harder. I can’t stop-

„Yahaba!“

The ball dropped on the other side of the court and he turned around to see his spiky haired senpai Iwaizumi.

“You are overworking yourself, Yahaba...“ „Oh I’m sorry I didn’t-“ „Oh no you know exactly what you’re doing! I already have one of you dumbasses!“, he looked at Oikawa, standing in the door talking to a few fan girls.

“Don’t freak out too much, ok?“, he sounded concerned...

“I’ll try, Iwaizumi-san!“

Shigeru hurried out of the locker room.

He was late to his and Kenjirou’s weekly movie night!

While he was mentally crossing all the things in his bag off a list as to not forget what to bring the boy ran into someone...and crashed to the ground.

“Hey watch were your going!“ the guy he bumped into only gave a little growl as answer.Kyoutani.

Of course it was Kyoutani.

“You’re good...“ came a little murmur from besides him where Kyoutani had apparently set off into the same way as him home.

Shigeru raised an eyebrow.

“You’re a good Player...“ Shigeru shoot around at that.

“Wh-what? You t-think I’m a g-good player?“

“I mean yeah...“Shigeru could feel a flush creep up his cheeks.

Wait what? Im supposed to hate him! He quit the team! But...

Diffrents

They were 17.

“This arm has to be a bit higher.“

Kenjirou was maybe having a so called gay panic.

Semi was too close. He was also correcting his form and touching him in all these places- Kenjirou couldn’t do this.

He threw the ball into the air, jumped and smashed that ball to the ground.

“Not so bad-Not so bad! But there is still some things you need to work on.“

“Well I wanna see you do a jump serve.“, he whispered.“As you wish, Shirabu my highness.“ The older said with a little bow before he got up to serve.

Kenjirou refuses to admit that his heart danced a little cha cha cha when Semi said his name.

The ash blond threw the ball up into the air, the perfect hight, he took two large steps and leaped into the air and finally his hand made contact with he ball and hit the ground with a beautiful thudh.

Kenjirou stood in awe for a few minutes before he excused himself to the bathroom.

Beauty

They were 17.

The ball dropped.

They lost.

Again.

Shiritorizawa won.

Again.

Again

They were 17.

They were sitting in the treehouse again.

„You guys played really well you know...“The copper haired boy looked over at his best friend and found the tear rolling down his face.

Neither one of them have ever been good at putting their feelings into words so all Kenjirou did was hold him.

Hold him while he crys.

Emotions

They were 17.

Karasuno.

Every point was a battle for power.

Yahaba got to play again...

He got to feel the ball in his hands again...

He made points!

He let the ball drop...This was his fault.

He thought he could be better, he thought he could finally face off against Kenjirou but no.

He was still weak.That’s all he was.

Weak

They were 17.

“This will be our first practice match with you as captain Shirabu.“, Kenjirou’s Coach looked at him. „You can do it.“

The new captain smiled and walked behind his team again.

“Hello and welcome at Seijoh!“ a familiar voice said. Kenjirou smiled.

“It’s a pleasure to win agains you.“

“Hahaha win? Yeah sure! We will stomp you to dust, Shirabu.“

“Game on, Yahaba.“

“Well what do we have here?, a singsongy voice said from behind Shigeru.

Oikawa Tooru

To be continued

[the-last-airblender]

Chapter 4: Run

He looks at you one more time, aims and fires.

Masterlist with the previous chapters

Word count: 5,6k

Notes: Din Djarin x reader

Warnings: angst, violence

Summary: You get prepared for your marriage to your much older cousin, but neither you nor Din are planning on letting it go through.

Moodboard for this chapter:

~

Your knees buckle and the firm grip on your arms is the only thing that keeps you upright as the guards escort you down the hall. Your father's words are still echoing in your head.

'I want to ask you not to get in our way this afternoon, Mando', he said. 'This is simply none of your business. Unfortunately, I will have to take certain measures to ensure that all of this runs smoothly. Too much is at stake here. Our cities will benefit enormously from this union, as our alliance will be stronger than ever. Plus, a big wedding party later this week is sure to make the people forget about the new tax law.'

'You can't force her to get married', Din tried to object.

Signas snorted. 'Oh, I sure can. And don't think you can stop this. It is happening.' He got as close to the Mandalorian as he dared. 'So keep quiet and you are free to leave tonight. If you don’t, I can’t guarantee the safety of that cute, green child you have with you.'

Din had flown forward in rage, but was stopped - with difficulty - by the guards, who basically had to hang from his arms with their full weight to do so. He wasn't quite sure what he planned to do when he reached the mayor, but he could still do a lot of damage with his hands cuffed. Signas knew this and had jumped back, but quickly recovered from the shock. He wiped imaginary dust from his sleeves.

'I knew he was valuable. Don't get me wrong, Mando', he said. 'I don't want to hurt that child-'

‘If you come anywhere near him, I'll tear your limbs off', Din growled, anger beaming off him as if it were sunlight. 

'Then don't give me a reason to', Signas said coldly. 'If you had just given me my daughter like we agreed, none of this would be necessary. You would've been a whole lot richer than the first time we met. So really, you're to blame if anything happens to him. '

This time the guards weren't able to restrain Din and he broke free from their grasp without warning, but they weren't complete idiots. He had barely taken two steps when the now familiar crackling sounded and his beskar loudly made contact with the ground. You grimaced in sympathy, the memory of the pain still fresh in your mind.

'Take him downstairs', Signas ordered irritably.

As they lifted him by his armpits and dragged him out of the room with much groaning, he turned to you. 

'The same goes for you, by the way. I'm sure you wouldn't want anyone else to get hurt because of you, let alone a little kid as big as your nephew. I suggest you keep that in mind today.'

You already know where the guards are taking you before you’ve even reached the door in question. A push makes you stumble into your bedroom, where you’re met by your stepmom Avlin and your aunt Taska, who watch in silence as your handcuffs are taken off. Your eyes dart across the room and are drawn to what lies on your bed: a long, red dress, richly decorated with gold thread, and a matching headscarf that won't be allowed to be taken off until the wedding night. In any other situation you would’ve loved the dress, but now it only adds to your anxiety.

The door closes behind you and you hear a guard cough. One shout and they'll come running back in, but for now they'll give the women the privacy they’d also get on a normal wedding day: it is tradition for the mother and mother-in-law of the bride to prepare her for the ceremony. Avlin is the closest thing you have to a mother, although your father has always forbidden you and Samick to call her that. He married her when you were very young and you love her to bits. You only wish you could say the same of him. 

Usually, this dressing ritual is an intimate, loving moment for the bride and her mother before she separates from her family and begins her own life with the groom. Today, however, it’ll be a lot more difficult.

You stay where you are, tense as a bowstring. You look at Avlin with wide eyes and the exhaustion and pain on her face seem to emphasize the wrinkles starting to form around her eyes and mouth. Her black hair falls on her shoulders and she fiddles with a loose thread from her long, yellow dress, clearly chosen for this occasion. She had disagreed with the whole situation, but you know she was too scared to argue with him. A part of you hates her for it, but then again, you're not much better. No one dares to rebel against him, because everyone knows what happens when someone attempts to do so. You quickly push the memories of those moments back into the most secluded part of the archive of your brain before they can reappear completely.

'Honey ...', she begins with a sigh.

Then, you can no longer stand it and you fly into her arms.

~

Red eyes stare at you in the mirror on your desk. Avlin is braiding your hair and your aunt is sitting next to you, frowning with concentration and decorating your arm with a tube of gold paint. Via the mirror you look at your other arm, which is already covered in curly patterns and countless flowers. You used to dream for hours about your big day, how you’d look so beautiful that all the guys in town would regret ignoring you. How you’d walk to the priest, where the love of your life would be waiting for you in the most beautiful of robes. How he’d shed a tear at the sight of your beauty and your broad smile. How it’d be the happiest day of your life.

You clench your fists to keep the anger off your face and get rewarded with a slap on your shoulder from your aunt.

'Don't move', she orders irritably.

Taska is your father's sister and like the rest of that branch of the family, she is very conservative -which in this case means she has absolutely no problem with this marriage. In fact, she is head of the city guard and will soon also oversee Chavez's city guard. She's therefore dressed in her ceremonial white guard uniform, with her shiny badge proudly pinned up and her blasters on her belt, instead of a festive dress like Avlin. You don't doubt she was furious when she heard about your escape and nearly had to say her promotion -and the considerable raise- goodbye. The fact that the situation now seems to be under control is probably the only reason she’s decorating your arm instead of chopping it off. 

Unbelievable how your relationship changed so quickly; she's the one who had been training you and your brother since you were kids. You owe your fighting skills to her and now she happily contributes to this nightmare, ignoring your opinion and dismissing your strength.

You force yourself to take a deep breath and look at yourself in the mirror again. You have no tears left to cry and instead, anger is brewing deep inside you. Your fighting spirit is back in business. Still, you’ve got to be patient and approach this smartly. Cooperate for now and strike when everyone has dropped their guard. Now that the guards have electroblasters - undoubtedly courtesy of your cousin, who’s involved in the weapons industry - you won't underestimate them a second time. That feeling is most likely mutual, considering what you’ve done. Plus, your aunt is a problem in itself: even if you manage to get your hands on your weapons, you're not so sure you could beat her in combat. Maybe if you could get a hold on one of those electroblasters…

Avlin twists your braids into a bun and secures it with hairpins from the tray on your desk. Then she takes the red headscarf from your bed and starts wrapping it deftly around your head so that any hair disappears underneath. Your long, gold earrings rattle with every move. Once she has pinned the scarf in place, she puts her hands on your shoulders and squeezes them encouragingly. Before you can stop yourself, you've put your hand on hers. As much as you hate that Avlin’s allowing all of this, you know it's not her fault. Leaving her behind is gonna hurt like hell.

'You look regal', she whispers.

Despite everything, you cannot suppress a small smile. However, it disappears right away when your aunt approvingly adds: 'Chavez will not be able to resist you.'

Your chest tightens at the thought of your cousin's greedy gaze, which has followed you since long before this marriage was proposed.

'I'm glad that Mandalorian took you back', she continues without looking up and you don't feel like correcting her, fearing that you'll explode doing so. 'What a ridiculous situation that was! You clearly fail to see how this marriage will profit you as well. The life of a mayor's wife really isn't the end of the world. Think about it: wealth, status, servants... You can buy all the clothes you want and you won't even have to work for it!'

You grit your teeth and ignore her.

'Really, your father is doing you a favor. So put a smile on that pretty face of yours when we go downstairs, would you?' She puts the cap on the tube of body paint and proudly admires her work.

'Beautifully done, Taska', Avlin says diplomatically, before the sales pitch can continue. 'Hey, didn't you have something for her?'

Thanks to your familiarity with the Duuganese tradition you already know what she means.

'Oh yes, that's right', your aunt sighs, getting up and looking around. 'Where did I put that thing?'

'I believe I last saw it in the kitchen.'

Taska looks around one last time and then frowns as she walks towards the door. 'I could’ve sworn...'

As soon as she's gone, Avlin grabs something from under your bed and puts it in your hands. You observe the object, which has been wrapped in a piece of fabric.

'What is this?', you ask.

'We have to hurry', she whispers. ‘Open it.'

You unfold the package and see that it is a metal bracelet. You weigh it in your hands and notice it’s surprisingly light, although one side appears to be heavier. It’s about ten centimeters wide and subtly decorated with a floral pattern.

'It had to match your wedding attire, otherwise people would get suspicious', she explains. 'I had it made for you as soon as I heard about the wedding. Quick, put it on.'

You slide it around your right wrist and look at it from different angles. Only then do you see a small opening on the inside of your wrist.

'Now do this', she says, extending her wrist so the back of her hand moves toward her body. 'But be careful.'

Your brow furrows and you copy her movement. Suddenly, a small, flat blade shoots out from the opening and you nearly yelp, but swallow it just in time as you nervously glance at the door. As soon as you bend your wrist back, the blade shoots back inside the bracelet. Your confusion immediately turns into fascination and you try it a few more times. The blade is about eight centimeters long, razor sharp and sturdy, and invisible when retracted into the bracelet. With a wide grin you let it pop in and out a couple more times and notice that it makes virtually no noise. It’s a fine piece of craftsmanship.

'Pressing this disables the mechanism.' Avlin points to a small flower that, upon closer inspection, indeed looks like a button. 'You don't want to accidentally cut yourself or others.'

You throw your arms around her neck.

'Thanks, mom', you say into her long, black curls, now feeling even more rebellious.

She presses a kiss on your cheek and then pulls away to give you a serious look. 'I know I should have done more, that I should have put a stop to all this. I just...'

You shake your head. 'I know. This isn't on you. '

Her hand squeezes yours.

'Use this wisely', she warns. 'Wait for the right moment.'

You nod and lower your eyes.

'You know I have to leave, right?', you mutter.

A warm hand lifts your chin and forces you to look at your stepmother. She smiles sadly.

'I know', she whispers.

The door opens and your aunt enters with another bundle of cloth in her hand. You get up, feeling safe and self-assured now you have a weapon on you again, and turn around for the final part of the ceremony. Your aunt's fingers deftly attach something to the back of your headscarf and the next moment a thin gold filter falls over your world and the scent of attic and memories reaches your nose. It’s your aunt's bridal veil, as tradition dictates, and you have to admit it is beautiful as well. The edges are decorated with swirling, gold embroidery and the fabric is so light that you hardly notice you're wearing it. Thankfully, you can easily see through it, because it will stay on till just before the 'I do'. Then Chavez will lift it up. You swallow and turn to your aunt and Avlin. The latter looks at you with tears glittering in her eyes.

Before she can say anything, however, your aunt claps her hands excitedly. 'Time to go!'

~

'This isn’t fair', the female guard moans at the ceiling. 'Just as something interesting is about to go down, I have to babysit in the wine cellar.'

'Tell me about it', her colleague grumbles. 'I would’ve liked to see that bitch's face. She deserves everything that’s coming for her considering what she's done.'

Din only half listens to their complaints. His back is leaning against a large wine barrel and his hands rest on his bent knees. Every muscle in his body whines and his left arm still twitches every now and then. Being shocked twice in a short amount of time has left him in a horrible mood and now that he's back in control of his limbs, he's more than ready to end this shitshow.

Crappy, fluorescent lights cast a cold light into the sizable cellar, which is filled with at least a dozen large wine barrels in untidy rows. Cobwebs hang from the ceiling and it’s clear that nobody has bothered to clean in here for a long time, as people with dust allergies would surely drop dead upon entering. A couple of wooden crates with Maker-knows-what in them are stacked against the wall across Din. He suspects that his weapons have been put in one of those crates, because a few meters to his right the child looks at him with concern from his pod. How relieved Din had been to see him safe and sound. Oh, they’re all gonna pay for even threatening to hurt him.

'I would have preferred to chop her head off myself', the guard agrees. 'This is as close to a real punishment as we're gonna get, I guess. She's gonna spend the rest of her life wishing she never came back here.'

'That little brat should be in jail at the very least! She killed three of us and Signas is acting like she didn't eat her vegetables at dinner!'

Din takes a deep breath. Party time.

'They had it coming.'

The guards whip their heads around and the woman immediately explodes.

'What did you just say?!', she yells.

Her colleague tries to grab her arm, telling her that he isn't worth it, but she shakes him off, her furious gaze locked on their prisoner. Din's willing to bet she was close with the guards that were killed. He moves his hands to the right of his knees, pulling his feet further towards him, as if to hide a bit from her. The tension in the room is almost tangible. Good. Angry people make mistakes.

'They shouldn't have gotten in her way', Din shrugs. 'Have you seen those knives of hers? They brought it upon themselves.'

That's all it takes. She storms over to him, cursing and shouting and so caught up in her tirade that she has no time to react when Din suddenly moves. He draws the vibroblade from his boot, jumps to his feet and catches the woman in his arms, the blade against her throat. Immediately, the swearing dies away and she's wise enough not to move.

'Anna!' The other guard has drawn his blaster and is aiming it at Din, but he doesn't shoot. His colleague serves as a living shield and the Mandalorian wisely moves them between the guard and the child.

'Put the blaster down', he barks.

'Put the knife down', the guard counters.

'You want another one of your colleagues to die?'

He hesitates for a second, his face crumpled in anger, but then decides against creating another vacancy and drops his blaster on the ground.

'Where are my weapons?', Din demands.

'Don't tell him, Val!', Anna yells.

Val keeps silent and glares at him.

'I won't ask again', Din snarls, pressing the blade against her throat.

The guard reluctantly points to one of the crates. 'That one.'

'Open it.'

He walks over to it and opens the lid. Din drags his hostage along with him and glances into the crate. Relieved, he sees that his blasters, bullets and gauntlets are all accounted for.

Suddenly, a heel harshly meets his crotch, making him grunt in pain, and simultaneously Anna pushes his hands away from her throat, quickly diving away from his grip. Normally this could never have happened, but with his hands still handcuffed he is a lot less mobile. Enraged, she kicks him in the stomach, causing him to stumble backwards against the wall near the crate.

She really shouldn't have done that.

Both guards grab their blasters and keep them aimed at him.

'Bastard!', Anna spits, rubbing her throat. 'I'll get you for that!'

Din stares at them, panting but well aware of the fact that he's now standing right next to his weapons.

'I'll kill that little gremlin of yours, I swear', she continues furiously. 'I'll skin him alive!'

'Speaking of that little gremlin,' Val says slowly, 'what's it doing?'

All three of them look over at the child, who has his eyes closed and his hand raised in their direction. A small smile appears on Din's face under the helmet.

The next moment, his handcuffs click open.

~

With every step you take towards the palm tree filled courtyard, your heart beats faster. A Duuganese priest waits by the beautifully overgrown gazebo, dressed in black robes and holding a ceremonial staff. Once the 'I do'’s have been exchanged, he will hit the ground with it and loudly announce that the marriage has been approved by the gods. Chavez, richly dressed in bright blue and golden robes that lightly flutter in the wind, awaits her next to the priest. His long, black hair is tied into a bun on the back of his head and a big scimitar hangs from his belt - just for show. You know he can't actually wield it. His brown eyes are fixed on you and a shiver creeps down your spine.

‘You'll be okay’, you quietly tell yourself. ‘I won't let anything happen to you.’

Words Samick said to you years ago when he first taught you how to drive a speeder. Now he waits by the small artificial pond a few feet from the gazebo, his arms folded. The inner conflict is visible on his face and for a moment you wonder if he also remembers his words. When he averts his gaze, you’re sure.

Your stepmother, your aunt and you stop right in front of the priest. The two women bow to him and step aside. On the other side of the priest is your father with a smug expression on his face and to your left and right guards are watching your every move. A gentle breeze rustles the trees.

Chavez reaches out to you with a grin. 'Let's do this.'

Wait for the right moment. With a sweet smile you take his hand and he pulls you closer, as if he can hardly wait to do Maker-knows-what to you. The priest hits the ground with his staff and begins his story. You hardly hear it as you scan your surroundings as inconspicuously as possible and wonder how you’re going to tackle this. In any case, waiting for the 'I do' would be a bad idea, because that’s when all eyes will be on you and as soon as you say yes, you’ll be married in the eyes of the gods and the law and you want to prevent that at all costs. The thought of Chavez having any kind of power or claim over you makes your stomach turn. You need a diversion.

It's as if the gods heard you. Out of nowhere, shots echo through the courtyard and two guards fall to the ground. Avlin screams, your brother and your father look around in alarm, searching for the source of the blasterfire, and Chavez protectively pulls you to his chest. You immediately tear yourself loose from his grip. Your aunt is the first to spot the Mandalorian and starts firing in his direction.

How he slipped into the courtyard with all that beskar on is a mystery to you, but the fact that he’s here at all makes your heart leap with joy and relief. You rip your veil off and fly to one of the fallen guards to grab his blaster, while the shots continue without interruption. The other two guards, like the rest of your family, managed to hide behind trees and they fire at a  certain point behind the gazebo, where Din pops out of the thick vegetation for a second and continues to make things real difficult for them. You don't bother hiding, knowing that you stand out in your red dress and that Din won't shoot you anyway. Just as you’re about to start firing at the two guards, you hear running footsteps behind you and when you whirl around, you see even more guards coming: not just your father's, but also your uncle's. You’re outnumbered. 

You start firing at the hallway nonetheless and several hit the floor, but more keep coming. You duck behind a tree after all, splinters flying around. A look over your shoulder tells you that the other two guards have lost the fight and the fight now appears to be between Din and your aunt, who seem to be quite well matched and fire at each other from the cover of the dense vegetation.

You keep shooting at the entrance from behind your tree, but there’s just too many opponents and the first manage to reach the courtyard and seek shelter in the vegetation. A well-aimed shot makes you dive away and as you press your back against your tree, your gaze crosses that of Samick, crouched helplessly behind a bush. He looks from you to the guards and then to the fallen guard right in front of him. Then his hand moves to his blaster and your heart sinks in your shoes.

‘Please,’ you quietly beg the gods, ‘don’t make me fight my brother.’

He picks up the gun and gets to his feet.

'Samick!', you beg over the sound of the blasters going off all around you. 'Please!'

He looks at you one more time, aims and fires.

You dive sideways, but then you hear a heavy thud and a now familiar crackling close behind you. He runs over to you and joins your spot behind the tree. You exchange tiny smiles and that’s all you need. As if on command, you both jump up and open fire.

~

Damn, where’s that woman?

Din looks around with narrowed eyes, but the vegetation is too dense and your aunt is nowhere to be seen. She should be somewhere on the floor right in front of him, since that’s where he'd heard the scream, but he can’t see her and all his instincts tell him to be on guard. His helmet shows the many footsteps in the garden, but both of them have run back and forth quite a bit and it is difficult to see what her most recent footsteps are. Then he sees footsteps leading to the edge of the courtyard and when he realizes that they are circling around him, it’s already too late.

'Drop it', says a voice behind him.

Gritting his teeth, he puts down his blaster and stands up, turning towards your aunt.

She smiles triumphantly. 'I can be sneaky too. Now walk.'

She gestures with one of her blasters and he starts walking ahead of her towards the gazebo and the clearing where he'd just seen you during the ceremony, all red and gold. He couldn't resist admiring you from the bushes where he hid. You were by far the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.

As he reaches the gazebo, he is surprised to see at least a dozen additional guards, lying motionless on the ground or still jerking from a electroblaster hit. You’re standing next to your brother, who seems to have taken your side, as you both keep your blasters pointed at Signas and the priest. With your headscarf slightly undone, dirt on your face and a blaster in each hand, you look even more beautiful than before. Avlin stands to the side, fear in her eyes as she seems torn between her children and her husband. There's no sign of the groom.

'Put down those weapons!', Din hears Signas angrily say. 'Stop this madness!'

Neither of you move and everyone turns their eyes towards him and your aunt as they step into the clearing. Your eyes widen in surprise and concern.

'Drop the blaster, aunt Taska', you say in a steady voice, your blaster now pointing at where she’s using Din as a human shield.

She snorts. 'You put that blaster away, child. You're not gonna kill your own aunt, now, are you?'

You cock your head. 'You're right. I'm not.' And without blinking, you fire.

It's a direct hit. She drops on the ground like a bag of flour and starts shaking as the electricity violently takes over control of her muscles. Din looks at her and then at you. That shot was impeccable: he'd felt it go right past his hip, to where Taska apparently wasn't entirely shielded by his body. An unstable and incredibly tiny target, but you hit it without hesitating, not worried in the slightest about accidentally hitting him and it is clear why.

Then, he turns to Signas and the priest and drily announces: 'I object to this wedding.'

Despite everything, you grin and throw him one of your blasters, which he easily catches. Then he grabs Signas by his robes and pushes him towards you. 'What do you want to do with him?'

You hesitate, your blaster still pointed at your father, not sure what to answer. What to do with the most influential man in town? The man who made your life so miserable?

'I don't know', you whisper.

Signas bursts out laughing and you cringe.

'Go ahead', he grins scornfully. 'Shoot me. Kill me! You wouldn't dare.'

You grip the blaster firmly, but you both know he's right. Din looks from you to your father, waiting for your response.

Then Signas suddenly grabs your wrist, snatches the blaster from your hand and grabs your throat so tightly that stars appear before your eyes. In a reflex you try to push him away, gasping for breath like a goldfish on dry land, but in the process you extend your wrist and the knife shoots out of your bracelet.

And digs into your father's abdomen.

Much later you still won’t be able to say with certainty whether you meant to do that. Signas's expression changes from furious to bewildered and he looks down with a frown as he is pulled away by your brother and Din, who rushed over to you, and the pressure on your throat disappears. You gasp for breath, even though the whole thing lasted only a few seconds. The two men lower the now wailing Signas to the ground, knowing he won't be a threat anymore. With wide eyes you stare at the knife on your wrist, blood dripping off the blade.

‘Are you okay?’, Samick asks, his eyebrows raised in worry.

'I didn't ... I ...', you stammer as he puts his arms around you.

'I know.’

You make sure to retract the knife before embracing him tightly and you bury your face in his neck.

'I'm so sorry', Samick whispers. 'For everything. I should have helped you sooner, I was a coward. Please forgive me. '

You let go, tears streaming down your cheeks, and smile. 'Of course.' Hesitantly, you turn to Avlin. 'I'm sorry-'

She shakes her head and there's no grief or anger on her face when she walks over to you and takes your hands.

'Don't be', she sighs. 'I won't miss him in the slightest.'

Suddenly, you hear a voice in the distance.

'City guard!', someone shouts. 'Everything alright, mister mayor?'

The color drains from your face as you look towards the entrance and start to panic. Not all the guards are dead and when they come to, they will certainly make sure to tell everyone what went down here. You're screwed.

Avlin, though, keeps her head cool and quickly hugs you before grabbing your shoulders and looking you straight in the eye.

'Go, quickly', she commands softly. 'Take the speeders. We'll hold them off - I'll make something up.' You start to protest, but she interrupts you. 'Don't worry about us. We'll be fine, we'll leave as soon as we get the chance.' She sternly ushers you towards the other door. 'Run! Oh, and check the second drawer in your father's desk!'

'I love you', you tell her and Samick before you and Din hastily make your way towards the exit. Your brother walks over to the entrance, where the first city guards appear just as you enter the hallway. You blink away your tears and take a left turn, the Mandalorian right behind you. The hall runs around the courtyard and you wait until all the city guards are in there before you quickly walk towards the main entrance. Then you pass your father's office and after a short hesitation you duck inside.

'There's no time!', Din hisses, having heard what Avlin said.

You ignore him and run to the desk, pulling open the second drawer. On top of a pile of papers is a red, velvet bag of credits. It's your dowry, you realize. You grab it and grin. You’ll make good use of this.

As you walk down the hall, Din pushes a button on his gauntlet and soon the pod with the child comes floating down the hall. He coos at the sight of the Mandalorian.

'I'm happy to see you too, kid', the Mandalorian says in a hushed voice. 'But we have to get out of here.'

A press on another button closes the pod's panels as you walk into the entrance hall, where you nearly trip over your bag. Apparently it had been thrown there carelessly and you sling it over your shoulder as you pass it. The guard who had taken it from you had also taken your daggers and blaster and put them in the bag, you notice after a quick glance at the contents. Nice.

You run out the door and luckily no city guards remain outside.

'This way!', you shout, turning right to where the speeder bikes are.

Din quickly attaches the pod to one of the speeders while you hop on another and start the engine. A few seconds later, you both race off.

~

Weyfel meets you at the workshop. He spreads his arms in an apologetic gesture.

'Sorry guys, I'm afraid the mayor doesn't like me very much', he says, laughing awkwardly. 'I'll lose my business for sure if I get in his way.'

Din ignores him and keeps walking towards the Razor Crest, which, thankfully, now looks fully finished. The pod hovers after him.

You, however, glare at the mechanic, snarling: 'Thanks a lot.'

He looks after you as you stomp away, no doubt confused by your outfit. You don’t care.

At the base of the boarding ramp, you stop and look up at Din, who’s almost inside. He hears your footsteps stop and looks back. You rub your neck hesitantly. He might have said you could hitch a ride to Nevarro, but who knows, he might have changed his mind. You certainly wouldn't blame him after today's events. He got shocked twice thanks to you.

Din follows your thought process and for a second, he asks himself the same question he did last night. The second after, though, he knows the answer.

‘Come on’, he says, turning around and disappearing into the ship's hull.

A smile splits your face in two and you can only just stop yourself from skipping up the ramp. Something tells you that your life is about to get a whole lot better than before.

~

Tag list: @buckysalefty @dark-academics-and-florals

[clatterbane]

(Previous was apparently from 6 May. Update as of one week later. Of the same year, whether or not it feels that way. 🥴)

Lucky Friday the 13th, this time around! I now officially exist as a person in the Swedish Population Register. 😁 Yay?

Mr. C checked his info on Skatteverket's portal again a couple of times yesterday morning, because that is evidently a thing he has quietly been doing on the regular. And the second time, I was showing up as married to him and all--with an actual personnummer displayed!

And the notification letter from them was also waiting in our mailbox when he checked it? 🤔 Timing seems a tas unusual, but OK. Just relieved to get both, honestly.

Next up in this quest line: more fun with Skatteverket! This is another round of more or less just finishing up some loose ends, to finally get an actual national ID card also somewhat bizarrely issued through... Skatteverket.

(And apparently not to be confused with the ones actual citizens get, which are handled by the cops who also issue passports. They are supposed to function exactly the same, however. Supposed to.)

But, of course we can't just do that through the little multiagency service center branch near our place. Only a few of their larger tax offices in the whole country are set up to issue the photo IDs. One of those three offices is actually the original place downtown here in Malmö, where we stupidly went the first time, out of the required order. 😒 Some benefits to ending up in the 3rd largest city, after all.

But, of course they didn't have any appointments showing as available over the next few months. Because of course you need to book an appointment in advance to basically get another driver's license photo taken.

But, thankfully you can book a time at any of the three (3) offices in the whole of Sweden that you want! There were actually multiple slots showing as open in Göteborg/Gothenburg on Monday. He snagged the latest one available, at 3:30 p.m.

(Easy enough to book online, btw, if you have the necessary e-ID credentials to log into the system and actually pay them the fee! 🙄 Luckily, I do have a pet Household Swede for assistance in such matters. Guess you're really fucked if you can't find someone willing/able to help who is already bootstrapped into the system to the required point. Seriously, not even joking.)

So, on the plus side? I'm finally getting to visit Göteborg! On every other side? SKATTEVERKET! 😑

So, the current plan is to basically just cab it to the appropriate station on this end on Monday morning, to avoid needing to navigate public transport in a hurry with a wheelchair. Catch a several hour direct train to Göteborg Centralstation (hopefully with some packed lunch/backup snacks!)--then cab it from there to spend another lovely afternoon with Skatteverket.

After that's over, I am certainly hoping to at least get a chance to stop somewhere and get at least some nice fika into my insulin junkie ass--which is still slow as hell trying to get solid foods somewhat safely swallowed. At least finding GF food while I'm out is really not a big problem here! 😎 I do not want to spend a whole day chugging damned protein shakes and probably Thermos coffee again, but will if nerds must.

Then, it's right back on a train to Malmö. And quite possibly a several day coma. Actually getting to poke around Göteborg, like, at all, will just need to wait for that elusive some day in the future. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

We may or may not need to drag ourselves back there to pick up the damned card in person. But that should have Skatteverket out of the way for the foreseeable future? Pls? 🥺

Everybody's (and my) first experience in Sweden it seems

Indeed. 😩

Though, we did get my second personnummer application turned in yesterday afternoon, and maybe the documentation they copied will be enough this time. (!)

Again, there is absolutely no way I wouldn't qualify as a legit legal resident who is entitled to Official Personhood here. (Which is honestly how it feels.) But, the tax office. And bureaucrats gonna bureaucracy.

[omglr]

dumb as bricks dude

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You both like feminism.

Stranger: hi

You: hi

Stranger: asl

You: 32 F

Stranger: m 22 canada

You: cool, i am also in canada

Stranger: Vancouver

You: Toronto

Stranger: cool

Stranger: Feminist?

You: yes

You: you?

Stranger: im a man so... DUH.. NO

You: kurt cobain was a feminist

Stranger: never knew that

Stranger: our retard PM is a feminist.

You: eh... is he though?

Stranger: claims to be but hes useless regardless

You: yeah

Stranger: so why are you a sexist?

You: lol

You: in what way?

Stranger: feminism is hatred of men

You: i like kurt cobain

Stranger: hes dead

You: yeah, he was good dude though

Stranger: yeah.. but feminist men are pathetic

You: mmmmeh

You: it kinda sounds like you're the one who is sexist?

Stranger: how so?

You: cause you think that feminism is about the hatred of men, and that men who are feminists aren't manly enough

Stranger: exactly

You: and that says something about how much you value women

Stranger: feminism is about female superiority and any man who supports it needs to grow a pair of balls and realize hes the superior one

Stranger: I dont value women.

You: yeah

You: so you are sexist

Stranger: and women dont value men so...

You: mmmm, that's also pretty obviously wrong

Stranger: sure

Stranger: lets say a woman has a boyfriend.

then she meets a better looking, stronger richer man whos showing interest in her, shes dumping the current BF for the new guy.

You: women rarely value sexist men, so maybe you just didn't recognize that your attitude was effecting how people treat you and creating a feedback loop

Stranger: LOL I avoid women now

You: yeah, maybe you need to get a hobby?

Stranger: I have hobbies

Stranger: I've had 3 girlfriends, and guess what

You: are you MTGOW now?

Stranger: yeah.

Stranger: its freedom

You: have you considered castration?

Stranger: why...

You: that's freedom from sexual needs

Stranger: I can jerk off

You: focus on playing the chello or whatever

Stranger: sure

Stranger: if women were not so shallow and heartless I wouldnt be MGTOW

You: i think that's the self fulfilling prophesy speaking

Stranger: well, im not good looking, im not 6'2 and I dont make $100K a year after taxes, im of no interest to a woman .

You: you're 22 though

Stranger: I know. and?

You: dudes still look like teenagers at that point

You: at like 35 you're probably gonna look pretty good

Stranger: not really, people have guess that im 30...

You: eh, i mean, it just seems like you are giving up too early and getting advice from other dudes who also gave up

Stranger: I gave up 3 years ago

You: you are gonna let a teenager tell you how to live?

Stranger: no

Stranger: I decide how I live

You: yeah but its never to late to change directions

Stranger: also, my dream job is bus driver, I cant say how it is at the TTC, but here, the pay is awesome, the benefits are great, the pension is fat, once im older and driving a bus women will probably want me, but not for me, for the perks that come from being with me, the fat pay checks, the family benefits etc

You: yeah that sounds good

You: go for it

Stranger: yeah, so, sorry girls, im not interested in you.

You: its ok not to be interested in girls

Stranger: im not gay

Stranger: im just not a betabux

You: it is a bit weird to think women are mostly interested in money though

Stranger: but its the truth

You: like, women are interested in feeling secure

Stranger: because god forbid she has to work to support herself

You: and couples who are financially insecure tend to have a hard time unless they work together

Stranger: ok

You: like most women have goals and shit they want to do with their lives, no body is really expecting to be a stay at home mom in this economy

Stranger: i know

Stranger: but they want a man to get the money to pay the bills while her money goes for fun stuff

You: i've never been in a relationship like that

Stranger: then you've never been married

You: i have been married

You: have you?

Stranger: FUCK NO

Stranger: why would I do that?

You: it just seems like you were speaking from some authority

Stranger: I know what a marriage is like

You: how?

Stranger: by listening to other men

Stranger: its bullshit, nothing but being controlled by a wife

You: lol, ok

You: those dudes probably shouldn't be married

Stranger: and she'll get bored and cheat sooner or later

You: did your parents get divorced?

Stranger: never married

You: where they partners?

You: were^

Stranger: they were dating.

Stranger: Anyway the 3 girlfriends i had were nothing but lying whores

You: and this was before you were 19?

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: your point?

You: teenagers are dipshits

Stranger: sure

You: and treat eachother terribly

Stranger: thats odd, I treated them fine, I guess im just smarter than they are

You: mmmm, maybe

Stranger: obviously

You: you sound pretty arrogant though

Stranger: oh well

Stranger: women need to learn how to respect men and how to treat a BF

You: ehhhhhh ok, what do men need to do?

Stranger: nothing, they are fine

You: how come their needs aren't being met then?

Stranger: because women dont value men

You: perhaps...

You: but maybe its because men need to learn how to communicate?

Stranger: nope

Stranger: woman -is mad-

man "are you ok"

woman- still mad- "im fine"

but men cant communicate... ok then

You: like the men who are married and being controlled by their wives and are expected to pay the bills and shit

Stranger: its either that or get divorced and pay alimony and child support

You: could have had conversations with their partners about responcibilities

Stranger: LOL a woman taking equal responsibility

You: eh, unpaid labour is often taken for granted by dudes

Stranger: aww, did she make dinner?

You: shrug, i don't know, I'm giving you a lot here

You: but its boring me,

Stranger: well women are boring

You: like, you can keep repeating sexist shit until you die alone and unloved

You: like, i don't care, really

Stranger: im not good looking, im not worth of love

You: dude your self esteem is bonkers

You: stop listening to men who tell you shit like that

Stranger: but they are right

You: stop listening to women who tell you shit like that

Stranger: but women know what women like

You: focus on your bus goal, read some fiction by diverse authors, take a fucking pottery class, stay off incel and mgtow message boards

Stranger: but MGTOW and Incel is the truth

Stranger: I am an incel

You: get your shit together, drop your shit attitude and stereotype nonsense, and change your stupid life

Stranger: nah

Stranger: I live the truth

You: next time i'm in vancouver I'm gonna slap the shit out of any busdrivers over 6 feet

Stranger: have fun judging their height when they are sitting, plus any new buses purchased after 2018 have a driver barrier

You: they all take smoke breaks

Stranger: no

You: ok, well, i'm not actually going to, i forgot what the point of that comment was

Stranger: lol

Stranger: I'll be too busy driving to have a relationship

You: maybe go see a dominatrix or something where the value exchange of sex for money is clear and you don't have to get all resentful about it

Stranger: nah, I like keeping my money

You: mmmm you ever go on rollercoasters?

Stranger: long ago

You: you ever go for a fancy dinner or a 3d movie?

Stranger: no and yes

You: back massage or dentist appointment?

Stranger: no

You: yeah, 22 and you haven't seen a dentist?

Stranger: well long ago

You: before you had to pay for it?

Stranger: yeah

You: you still got your wisdom teeth?

Stranger: nope

You: lol, lucky you have a mom to take care of your teeth

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: Anyway when im driving a bus I wont have time for dating

You: oh yeah?

Stranger: yah

Stranger: there is so much available OT to do so when will I have time to try (and fail) to get a girl

You: when you are walking your dog in the park

You: like a responsible adult

Stranger: I dont care for pets

You: ok, well, i've spent a lot of time here trying to problem solve your stupid shit, do you have any questions about feminism?

Stranger: why is feminism even needed?

You: to fight for the rights of the marginalized and prevent social regression

Stranger: sounds BS

You: meh

You: its pretty awesome honestly

Stranger: not its not

Stranger: women are not oppressed, they are just greedy and demanding

You: lol, but imagine their was a mgtow/incel support group for woman

Stranger: nope

You: except not shitty

Stranger: sure

Stranger: dating is shit

You: https://www.mmiwg-ffada.ca/

Stranger: what is that?

You: website for missing and murdered indigenous women and girls

Stranger: dont care

You: ok, so you don't care about the parts of society where women are oppressed

Stranger: nope

You: no wonder you didn'

You: t notice

Stranger: ever seen a homeless man?

You: yeah dude

Stranger: "oppressed" men

You: capitalism man and conservative pollitics man

Stranger: ok?

You: socialist feminism is about getting the needs of homeless men met

Stranger: nope

Stranger: socialism is bullshit

You: lol

You: but a workers union for bus drivers?

Stranger: yes

You: bs or no?

Stranger: nope

You: welcome to the labour movement

Stranger: socialism is bullshit.

You: its fuckin socialism

Stranger: "free" "free "free"

You: you dork

Stranger: "Socialism cause I dont want to work, I want it free, paid for by those who do work"

You: you don't actually know shit about it

Stranger: sure

Stranger: lets raise taxes for the rich so you dont have to pay for shit

You: mmmm, well that doesn't sound too bad

You: are you rich?

Stranger: nope

Stranger: you know why those people are rich?

You: exploiting the working class

Stranger: nope, working hard

You: no dude, they extract value from the work and pay them as little as possible

Stranger: well, get a new job, maybe a union job, they pay more

Stranger: stop being lazy

You: lol, dude, if you don't want your boss to exploit you and take 95% of the value created by you working your ass off, guess what helps with that?

You: fucking forming a union

You: fucking socialism

Stranger: yeah, but not socialist bullshit

Stranger: "boo hoo, I have to work hard boo hoo"

You: UNIONS ARE SOCIALIST

Stranger: nope

You: lol, ok

You: tell that to the guys when you are applying for your union job

Stranger: I will enjoy my union job

You: and you'll be an ignorant hipocrit

Stranger: I'll be richer than you simply by working.

You: lol,

You: jesus

Stranger: so stop being a crybaby and get a job

You: i have a job, and i'm in a union

You: but i know what i'm talking about

You: i'm not regurgitating capitalist bullshit

Stranger: no you dont, you seem to think those who work harder than you should pay for your stuff

You: lol dude

Stranger: what

You: i don't know where to start

You: you are just really thick

Stranger: nope, just smarter than you

You: ok, so remember how you had your mom pay for your dental care

Stranger: yeah

You: remember how your teeth are growing out of your skull

Stranger: yeah...

Stranger: get on with it idiot

You: and how if you had head trauma you could get free health care at a hospital

Stranger: GET ON WITH YOUR POINT IDIOT

You: but if you have a tooth problem you have you pay hundreds of dollars

Stranger: whats your fucking point moron

You: dentistry could be socialized like the rest of healthcare

You: and it would be better for society

Stranger: "boo hoo, I dont wanna pay when I have too, boo hoo

Stranger: "

Stranger: "make it free cause I dont wanna pay, wwwaaaaa"

You: and it wouldnt cost people much and it would imrpove the quality of life of lots of people

Stranger: sure

You: that's the kind of free shit socialists want

You: not Ipods

Stranger: sure

You: although, with the savings... you could buy an ipod

You: but then apple would also get taxed properly

Stranger: they want free college, higher taxes for those who work so social assistance rates can be raised for those who cant be bothered to work

You: and pay for dentistry....

Stranger: aww, did you have to pay a bill like an adult?

You: dude, you already said you have never paid a dentist bill in your life

Stranger: but did you

You: yeah I'm 32

Stranger: yeah but you act like a child

You: dude you don't even understand taxes

Stranger: i do

You: yeah, you are worried that your taxes which you pay for will be used for something usefull for society

Stranger: but I' be paying MORE taxes, I dont want that

You: and you are worried that people who make millions of dollars more than you are going to have to pay more

You: progressive taxation doesn't work like that

Stranger: well, they earned it why should they have to pay more?

You: because they have extracted that value from the world, and that's what taxes are, for taking care of the world

Stranger: sure

You: yeah

Stranger: im not intrested in your bs

You: lol

You: i mean, you're a piece of work buddy

Stranger: thanks

You: i mean, you've got a lot of growing up to do

Stranger: I could care less what a socialist loser thinks

Stranger: I worked for it, its fucking mine

You: lol

You: jesus, ok

You: lets start over

Stranger: you want it? work harder

You: "I worked for it, it's fucking mine"

Stranger: yeah

You: yeah

You: agreed

Stranger: so you want something? work harder and earn it, dont expect someone else to pay for it

You: you get hired for a job flipping burgers

Stranger: no thanks, I can do better than that

You: you work 9 hour shifts, and cook 300 burgers an hour

Stranger: is that your job?

You: you get paid, 12 dollars

You: no i'm an electrician

Stranger: then why do those shit jobs matter?

You: but this person gets paid 12 dollars for making 300 burgers sold for an average of $4 each

Stranger: your point is?

You: they process the food that made the company $1200

Stranger: ok and?

You: and got paid 1%

Stranger: your point is?

You: the $1200, I WORKED FOR IT, I PRODUCED IT, ITS FUCKING MINE

Stranger: nope

Stranger: you get paid $12 per hour worked, not per item cooked

You: yeah dude its the same shit, you are worried about the people who took 99% of the wealth from a shit job employee having to pay more taxes and give poor people dental care

Stranger: if they want to get paid more go get a higher skilled job than flipping burgers and salting fries

You: it can be a fucking hard job

You: like, seriously watch a fast food employee next time you are in one

You: they are always having to do shit

Stranger: I did, she was cute and bent over

You: yeah, you should have paid her for that

Stranger: nope

You: you stole a look

Stranger: paid her to pick up trash from the floor? I believe the company pays her for that

You: again, the wealthy will pay their employees as little as they legally can, and keep as much money as they can and pay as little taxes as they can

Stranger: oh

Stranger: well

Stranger: get a higher paying job?

You: and you think that these people are working harder

Stranger: there is no skill in burger flipping

You: when they are just working hard enough to exploit resources of other people and hoard wealth

Stranger: sure

You: so yeah, burger flipping is a job that is grueling and bullshit and annoying

Stranger: well, get a new one

You: but the metaphor is applicable to most jobs

Stranger: sure

You: you figure out how much the company is making off of you, and you realize it is a lot more than they are paying you and they should be respecting you a lot more for doing your job well

You: that's why unions are fucking awesome

You: because they can protect you from exploitation, get you better wages and services

You: and fight for you if you are wronged

Stranger: yeah, so those burger flippers can go get a new union job

You: the burger flippers can also start a union, but mcdonalds is pretty keen on union busting

Stranger: I've had to repeat my order to some of the morons working there and sometimes they still cant get it right, so why should they be paid more?

You: again, you don't have to focus on burgers,

You: like, shit man

Stranger: oh well

You: anyway, your bus job sounds cool and i hope it treats you well and you learn from your coworkers what the union is doing for you

Stranger: yeah

Stranger: because I have the high skill required to drive a bus, I will be paid more than a no skilled worker in a store or Mcdicks

You: i mean... some would try to say that driving a bus doesn't take much skill at all

Stranger: explain to me how to do a right turn while driving a bus,

You: like it's basically sitting on a couch

Stranger: sure.

You: i mean, what goes on a double mcRib, no L, ex P,

Stranger: dont know, dont care

You: yeah, dude people undervalue the labour of workers

Stranger: sure

Stranger: "duuurr I put cheese on a burger"

You: "I made 600 burgers today, and some shithead started screaming at me for getting onions when he asked for no ketchup"

Stranger: well, do your job right

You: lol, show some compassion and empathy in every aspect of your life

Stranger: nah

You: yeah, dude

Stranger: if they cant figure out what "no ketchup" is they are not too bright

You: i think you missed the part where the guy didn't ask for no onions

You: he only asked for no ketchup

Stranger: oh well I dont care

Stranger: get a better job

Stranger: I've seen quite a few downright useless fast food workers, so tell me why they are worth more than $12 an hour?

You: your anecdotal evidence is as flawed in observations of fast food employees as it is with women

Stranger: sure

You: you have no empathy and only think about yourself

You: you are short sighted, ignorant and arrogant

Stranger: I had to repeat my order of "2 double cheese burgers and 1 regular sized M&M Mcflurry " 3 times

Stranger: only to get slow service and an oreo Mcflurry

You: yeah dude, i had to repeat unions are socialism like 5 times and you still don't understand

Stranger: but unions are not socialism you fuckward

Stranger: if you want to get paid more EARN IT

You: fuckin' you want me to crack open wikipedia

Stranger: dont care

Stranger: I dont care what some socialist moron thinks

Stranger: burger flippers are skilless, so they get low paid

You: ok, but you understand the central theme though right?

Stranger: high skill= high pay

low skill = low pay

You: a burger flipper does a variety of tasks for 8 hours a day and gets paid 1% of the value they produce, or less

Stranger: burger flipper has no usefull skills

You: YOU EAT THE FOOD DIPSHIT

Stranger: and?

You: THEY MADE THE FOOD FOR YOU!

Stranger: making food isnt hard

You: YOU DIDN"T MAKE THE FOOD AND YOU GOT FOOD

Stranger: they are paid to make the food

Stranger: I bought the food

You: ok, so you paid a company 99% for them to exploit a worker tyo make you a burger

Stranger: yeah, so what

Stranger: why do you even care? its not your job

You: we move up, and look at the day shift managers, the night shift managers, they get paid quite a bit more than the employees but aren't working much harder

Stranger: managers are overpaid slackers

You: they might actually be working less hard

You: yeah, and above them, managers of the local franchises, and up ward and upward to a ceo who is perhaps having a meeting once a day? and getting paid how much more than their lowest employee

Stranger: oh well\

Stranger: I dont care about the useless burger flipper

You: again, its not burgers, its everthing

You: its you right now

You: you don't even have this kushy bus job

You: with union support

You: you are probably unemployed

Stranger: you realize their job is pretty much

cooking food

taking out trash

sweeping the floor,

stuff you do at home, its simple shit

Stranger: I have a union job

You: what is your job?

Stranger: loading trucks

You: and that takes how much skill?

Stranger: a fair amount

You: in what way?

Stranger: gotta load 4 trucks, sort it according to the load sort, keep up with the pace of freight coming to you

You: but anyone with muscles could do it?

Stranger: if your loading a company truck keep count of the number of stops, if its owner op dont count it

Stranger: muscles and a brain

You: ok

Stranger: harder work than burger flippers

You: i mean, I was gonna scrutinize it further to make the point that your job seems pretty simple but you have lots of insider knowledge about the challenges of the job to say otherwise

Stranger: exactly

You: it could be argued that it is an unskilled labour possition though

Stranger: harder job thus for higher pay

You: maybe, or a labour rights movement that had your back

Stranger: no the unskilled is unloading trailers, all it takes it watch your head, watch out for the guy your with and put the labels facing up onto the conveyor

Stranger: still not socialism you idiot

You: i mean, i don't need to argue that rain is wet

You: you can deny it if you want

Stranger: nah

You: you can even call me an idiot for saying the rain is wet

Stranger: your dumb enough to think the morons at fast food deserve higher pay so I cant take you seriously

You: but it only reflects on your arrogance

Stranger: sure

Stranger: "2 double cheese burgers and an M&M Mcflurry"

I had to repeat it 3 times and they still couldnt get the order right.

but you think they should be paid more?

You: i guess should have picked a better metaphor

You: you are really hung up on that eh?

Stranger: its an example to prove you wrong

Stranger: picking up an empty cup from the floor is so hard, oh poor girl

You: it proves nothing really

You: except that you hate poor people

Stranger: it proves they are not worth more than min wage

You: and that they deserve worse treatment than wealthy people

Stranger: no, they just need to work harder to get higher pay

Stranger: also whens the last time you were in any fast food place?

You: and that caring about the needs of the marginalized and downtrodden is outside of your wheelhouse, and that you should eat shit and die alone

You: simple as that

You: fuck off

You: and die

Stranger: lol guess what

You: mgtow to hell

Stranger: I used to be homeless

You: yeah, sounds made up

Stranger: well its not

Stranger: you see, I did what was needed to get off the street, finish school and get a job

You: and you have internalized all sorts of capitalist bullshit along the way

Stranger: so what

Stranger: hard work is all you need

Stranger: get a skill

You: lol

Stranger: why are bus drivers paid so much?

high skilled job

gotta deal with shitty people sometimes

You: you're still pretty thick

Stranger: also, since you dodged my question, most fast food workers are high schoolers anyway, so who cares if they make min wage, most of that money is just blown when they hang out with friends anyway

You: ok, but that's not actually true

You: most fast food employees are between 28 an 40

Stranger: odd. I was in Mcdonalds today, the oldest guy there looked 20

Stranger: hmm, then how come I've seen people from my old highschool working there? they were a grade or two below me as well...

You: cause of the neighborhood you live in doesn't represent the majority of fastfood service jobs?

Stranger: I've been to quite a few and its all highschool looking kids workin there

You: and so you know a lot of workers who are 18-20 but that doesn't actually mean that's the average

You: https://groundswell.org/fast-food-misconceptions/

Stranger: want higher pay? get hire skill

You: 40 percent of the workforce in the fast food industry is 25 or older, and the average fast-food worker is 29 years old.

Stranger: get a skill

Stranger: https://www.monster.com/career-advice/article/best-paid-job-skills

You: but also, tax the rich and give services to poor people

Stranger: so tax those who work hard and have skills to pay for things for people who are lazy and have no skill.

Stranger: https://www.marketwatch.com/story/these-10-skills-you-need-to-earn-higher-wages-may-surprise-you-2017-04-18

You: alright lazy brain, i gotta go to bed

You: got work in the morning

You: gotta put these skills to work

Stranger: get a skill to get higher pay

Stranger: dont want to flip burgers? get a skill

You: dude I'm an electrician

Stranger: exactly, so your paid more than a burger flipper cause your usefull

You: not everyone can do this work, we need a diversity of workers doing all sorts of shit

Stranger: there are plenty of skilled jobs

You: you're dumb as bricks but you are getting paid decent with your loading job

Stranger: yeah, because its skill

Stranger: and im not dumb as bricks.

You: i want a society that takes care of you even though personally I hope boxes crush your legs and a woman shits in your mouth

Stranger: lol

Stranger: see, your so bitter

Stranger: you cant accept that not everyone agrees with you and you freak out

You: yeah, its just cause you are 22, a bitter misogynist and unable to process new information

Stranger: I have processed it

Stranger: and its bullshit

Stranger: you dont get high pay for low skill

You: eh... your bs assessment skills are weeeeeek

Stranger: everyone knows that to get high pay you gotta work hard

Stranger: take from those who work to give to those who dont, your fucked in the head

You: aight duder

You: eat shitbricks

You have disconnected.