#no joke but there are fake ass fans who watch these shows and complain about nearly every character being lgbt

[hellaversity]

Normalize (non-homophobic, non-transphobic) cishet people being fans of the Hellaverse. Normalize straight ally Hellaverse fans.

[jakethesequel]

My Scott Pilgrim Takes Off Review

From a long-long-time Scott Pilgrim fan.

Quick-form style:

PRO: The animation is stellar, does a great job at both adapting and upgrading the original artstyle with a bunch of motion.

PRO: I especially love all the little background references. Not just the ones related to the original comics or whatever either, there's a lot that are just aesthetic references to gamer stuff or Toronto landmarks (Honest "Ed's"!). Does a lot to make it feel more like it's really set in late 2000s/early 2010s Canadiana. I think you could fill a whole wiki just categorizing all the little connections they fit into every episode.

PRO: Truly a once-in-a-lifetime voice cast, I'm actually amazed they got the whole cast of the movie to come back after thirteen years.

PRO: Extremely funny with the jokes, as the comics and the movie both were, but even more concentrated, especially if you're sharp enough to catch all the background details and references.

CON: The main storyline feels rushed. More on that later.

PRO: Both the licensed soundtrack and the original compositions go fucking hard, rivalling the movie's already impressive album.

PRO: A lot of characters who didn't get a ton of development in the comics or movie get extra screen time and are seen in a new light that really fleshes them out as complete personalities where they might have been one-note before.

CON: A lot of the characters who were more important in the comics or movie have underdeveloped arcs in the anime, so they feel half-baked.

PRO: The scene-to-scene dialogue, and the way the characters socialize with each other, often feels fresh and real the way they were in the comics. It's cartoonish, of course, but they talk like long-time friends talk.

CON: Lisa Miller, my favorite tertiary character, was not included. Unforgivable.

Overall? Takes Off was an enjoyable addition to the series. Even with all its glitter, it's not as good as the original comics, but that's a high bar. I would say that Takes Off is equal or even better than the VS The World movie, and that's a good ass movie! The attention to detail and production quality is substantial in both. I personally think that the story in Takes Off had a little more substance, but I think opinions are going to vary strongly on that, and I can easily understand the other side. In any case, if you're new to Scott Pilgrim, Takes Off is a lot of fun, and if you end up liking it, the comics are even better. If you already enjoy Scott Pilgrim, Takes Off is a strong spin-off and worth watching.

Points heavier on spoilers below, and heavier on details as I slowly forget what "point form" means:

PRO: From the start, the first episode is bursting with love for the original series. There are multiple scenes that are shot-for-shot recreations of the comic, and it's a real treat to see the comic panels animated and voiced by the movie cast.

CON: Knive Chau's introduction is kind of brushed over. They basically say "Knives Chau: Scott's 17-year-old fake girlfriend (more on that later)." Except: There's never really more on that later.

PRO: A lot of the first episode's changes are done in a really funny way that fits the vibe. Obviously the Amazon -> Netflix change is just corporate politics, but delivering Netflix DVDs makes it feel like even more of a period piece. And changing Scott's awkward infodump from Puckman to Sonic cartoons - "one guy playing two versions of the same character" - is a cute lampshade hang.

CON: A lot of people are going to be turned off by the show's central twist. Everyone expected this to be an adaptation played straight, since that's what was advertised. It sure as hell shocked me when Scott "died"! I have no doubt some people are gonna have a more intense reaction and feel shitty about the rug-pull.

PRO: However! I came around on it pretty fast myself once I figured out what they were doing. While I would have adored a direct adaptation from the comics, I cannot complain about getting a brand new story by the original creator, and I think the whole AU idea of "what if Scott lost to the Seven Evil Exes" is a really fun one to explore! Regardless of execution, it's a cool concept and I kind of admire the balls of sucessfully pulling a bait-and-switch on such a major production. Managing to keep your main plotline a secret while working for a major production company and hiring box-office-topping actors is no small feat!

PRO: Again, the AU-fanfic-type stuff is a lot of fun. It's great how the League of Evil Exes finally gets to do their whole evil plan, and succeed in killing Ramona's date, then fall apart when they realize this didn't actually get them anywhere.

PRO: Also, while their fight does kind of unfairly nerf Gideon compared to his other appearances, it rocked seeing Matthew Patel clean house. I'm just a sucker for when a weak early enemy managed to usurp power through some bullshit. And of all the Evil Exes, he needed the glow-up the most, he got the least scenes out of any of them.

PRO: METRIC'S BACK!

CON: Even though he comes back to life, the funeral scene has weird vibes. Scott's friends and family reacted more emotionally when the comics did the "extra life" gag, but this is to their knowledge an actual permanent death. Even if she feels responsible, it's jarring that Ramona, who knew Scott for like two days and has an established habit of running from difficult feelings, seems more affected by grief than friends Scott that had known for years like Wallace, Kim, Stephen, even Envy. Hell, Knives was "dating" Scott for longer than Ramona's one-night stand, but she moves on quicker from the death of her fake boyfriend than her comic/movie counterparts do from just a breakup.

PRO: The casket just having spare change in it is a fucking great visual gag.

PRO: KIM PINE YURI???

CON: Kim's backstory and character arc gets shafted, and Scott's backstory loses complexity. More on that later.

PRO: There's less typical-late-2000s-loser type jokes about lesbians, and less catty bodyshaming, which is good. It might have been realistic dialogue at the time but it'd probably feel out of place in a modern production, even a period piece.

PRO: Related, Ramona has less internalized biphobia and doesn't make "experimenting in college" excuses about her sexuality. Some may feel like this simplifies her character, because her treating Roxie like an experiment is an important flaw, but I think it's a positive change. I'd rather her character be a bisexual girl with relationship issues than a comphet girl with relationship issues. The latter just reinforces bi erasure too much for me.

CON: Ramona inexplicably feels more loyal towards missing-presumed-dead Scott who she has had one date with than comic Ramona felt towards comic steady-boyfriend-of-several-months Scott, despite anime!Scott not getting to apologize for two-timing Ramona and Knives like comic!Scott did. I think this oversimplified her character and weakens her arc. More on that later.

CON: There's obviously an issue of balancing plotlines with runtime, but Roxie has a much more involved and interesting role in the story in the comics. She even moves in with Ramona for a while. The drama!

PRO: It's very cute seeing Knives hang out with the Sex Bob-omb crew on her own terms. She does that in the comics too, after she and Scott break up, but it's mostly offscreen unless Scott or Ramona also happen to be in the room. It's also a good addition to have her involved with the music herself rather than just be a fan.

PRO: Dead Kennedys needle drop. Fuck yeah.

PRO: In general, spending time with all of the Evil Exes is a lot of fun and does a lot of work to make them feel like well-rounded, fully realized characters. For me, I think this is the biggest benefit Takes Off brings to the series, and something that genuinely makes re-reading the comics more enjoyable. The Exes' scenes in their books pop more with the added detail to their personality from this anime.

PRO: Each Ex (sans Gideon/Gordon) gets their artstyle-shift backstory with Ramona lifted right from the comics.

CON: Even so, the Exes' appearances aren't totally even. Particularly Roxie, Todd, and Gideon/Gordon. Matthew, Lucas Lee, and the Twins benefit the most from the extra screentime, but every Ex has a few of their bumps shined off. Mostly in their backstories: while I love the flashbacks, they're all a lot less confrontational with Ramona about her own faults than their other appearances would suggest, again simplifying Ramona's story and weakening her arc. In previous appearances, many of the Exes were a lot less "fight Ramona's new BF to win her love back" and a lot more "fight Ramona's new BF because she broke my heart and I want revenge."

PRO: Simon Pegg and Nick Frost guest cameos!! That's how you KNOW it's an Edgar Wright project through and through

PRO: Young Neil becoming a cinephile and an accidental screenwriter is a great storyline, and the ongoing lampshading of adapting existing storylines makes room for a lot of good jokes at the creators' own expense.

PRO: WALLACE WELLS YAOI? Well, that much was more expected. But Todd Ingram/Wallace Wells yaoi? That's new ground!

CON: Again, it's a question of managing runtime and work-hours, but the Envy->Todd<-->Wallace love triangle isn't as interesting as the "taking a full page out of this volume for a relationship chart" love lattice from the comics, though it's still hilarious and a delight to watch. It would be fully in-character for Wallace to steal Envy's boyfriend, but that's nowhere near as juicy as the web of jealousy and desire between Scott+Ramona+Envy+Todd+Lynette+Knives(+Gideon, later on).

PRO: I'm glad they didn't re-cast Kieran Culkin, but I'm also grateful they wrote in a mea culpa about casting straight actors to play gay characters.

CON: Envy herself has very little character in the anime besides being Scott's bitchy famous ex-girlfriend, where the comics paint a much more sympathetic picture. Maybe an issue of Brie Larson being busy with Marvel, but unfortunate all the same. More on that later.

PRO: "Edgar Wrong"

PRO: Narration by Weird Al Yankovic

PRO: They have a lot of fun joking about Scott Pilgrim VS The World thanks to the set-up. I feel like every time there's an in-universe joke about adapting Scott Pilgrim (real life guy) into Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life (movie) it also works as a fourth-wall joke about adapting Scott Pilgrim (graphic novels) into Scott Pilgrim VS The World (movie). If the writing was less tight I think it'd be grating and either feel too meta or too avoidant, but I think they walk that line with talent and make most lines work on both levels. It's nice to see the creators take a good-natured jab at themselves for the issues the real movie ran into adapting a not-yet-finished 6-volume comic into a sub-2-hour super-overbudget studio movie with a professional soundtrack from several major indie rock stars. That joke about the movie not being able to make up its losses didn't come from nowhere, unfortunately, but I'm glad they can laugh about it.

PRO: The Chau/Stills songwriting team is great. They develop their own friendship in the comics, too, but it comes to life way more here. It does see them relegated to more of a comic relief role, rather than their more complicated arcs in the comics, but more on that later.

PRO: Gordon Goose from North Bay Ontario is an inspired choice, as is him friendshipping it up with Lucas Lee after they're both broke, as is especially him hooking up with Julie. I could honestly even see them getting together in the comic or movie versions too, if the story had gone a little differently. They've got great chemistry that I never even considered.

CON?PRO?IDK: Gordon Goose from the anime is an entirely different character from the comic's Gideon Gordon Graves. Some parts could fit: him originally being a loser from North Bay, him hanging out with Julie and Lucas Lee, even the anime-binge depression spiral could fit if events conspired for him to lose everything. Other parts, though, are trickier. I mentioned that he was a far weaker fighter than in other works, but that's minor and idk maybe it's a rock paper scissors thing (Scott is stronger than Matthew, Matthew is stronger than Gideon, Gideon is stronger than Scott). The BIG changes are that he doesn't seem to have any of his evil genius plots going on besides the League of Evil Exes. In the comics, he infected Ramona (and later Scott) with the Glow, a kind of emotional infection that enables and encourages avoidance; and in the movies, he stuck a mind-control chip in Ramona. (Also in the comics he kidnapped and cryogenically froze his 7 ex-girlfriends sans Ramona in a giant machine to "save" them until he could convince them to take him back, because he's a massive fucking asshole.) He did both long before Scott and Ramona met, so it's odd that there's seemingly no counterpart in the anime. It's also super different that after losing his wealth he stops being obsessed with Ramona. Where the other exes might have been more revenge motivated, Gideon was the one who really did want to try and win Ramona back by any means. His main character trait is that he's pretty much incapable of letting go when women reject him. There's echoes of that when Julie talks about his high school years, which I think is a good addition, but it makes it odd that in the final few episodes he's almost entirely uninterested in Scott and Ramona. Maybe that's Julie's influence, but that's a hard sell without actually showing it. (Plus, Julie didn't want Scott and Ramona together either, so almost a shared goal.) All in all, this makes Gordon Goose feel way more divergent from comic/movie Gideon Gordon Graves than any other character is. Still, I'm hesitant to commit to calling this a negative. It's different, but it might have been a difference needed for Takes Off to do what it wanted to do. Part of me wonders whether a Gideon played a tiny bit closer to norm would have been better, but I'm not confident in that, so decide for yourself.

CON: Gideon/Gordon never mentions his fetish for dressing people (Envy in particular) up like dolls.

PRO: While I know time travel plots get tiring, I much prefer it to Scott just being dead, or someone having just kidnapped him regular style.

PRO: The aesthetic for future-Toronto - and especially Old Wallace's sugar daddy's Nintendo mansion - fucking rocks.

PRO: Old Scott's character design, both in his time travel gear and his street clothes, totally nails the "Scott Pilgrim from a Bad Future" assignment. No notes.

PRO: He keeps his X-Men jacket (of course) while literally playing out his own Days of Future Past storyline. You absolutely know he's loving that fact. He wants to be Cable so bad.

PRO: Lots of characters in the future timeline wear masks, and the bus has a little disinfectant machine. These are already kinda staple tropes for dystopian futures, but there's another layer that makes it even better: If you look at the timeline Old Scott lays out, saying that about 13 (or maybe 15) years have passed since Young Scott's era, it seems pretty clear to me that they're referencing the 13-year gap between the movie and final book releasing in 2010, and the anime releasing in 2023. Suggesting that Young Scott is from around 2010, and Old Scott is just from... this year. So it's entirely possible the masks and disinfectant aren't for ANY kind of cool futuristic reason, that's just how alt future Toronto dealt with Covid-19. Personally I find that detail clever and also hilarious, it really got me when I realized.

PRO: Old Scott, subtitle: 37 years old, looking a solid decade older than that. I know red hair can go gray quick but he is not looking great for his age. Which isn't at all surprising considering his lifestyle.

CON: Some people, especially those who were heavily invested in the Scott/Ramona relationship from the comics or movie, are going to be upset over Old Scott and the divorce/separation reveal. I get it. Especially in the comics, they go through a hell of a lot of growth, and learn to genuinely love each other in a way they never had with anyone else. It sucks to see them fall back to their worst habits, Scott turning a breakup into a neurotic attempt to fix anything except his own behavior, and Ramona running away from a relationship with zero communication or closure and creating another resentful ex.

PRO: However, I'm not one of them. I have my gripes with the time-travel plotline in general that I'll get to, but I think Old Scott and Old Ramona going through a separation and a rough patch after several years of marriage is realistic and an interesting place to go. The comic had (still has) the most deeply developed relationship between Scott and Ramona, and left them on the strongest footing possible for their happy ending. Even the comic, though, never really promised them "happy ever after," it just said that they had all the skills they needed to make their relationship work, and left it up to them to traverse that long journey. Now, maybe you disagree with me and you think that comic Scott/Ramona should have been able to handle a rough spot better than anime Old Scott/Old Ramona. Thankfully, the anime gives you an out here: Old Scott's VR photo album has a couple details that show his timeline isn't exactly the comic or the movie storyline, so we can avoid stepping on the toes of existing endings, and explore new possibilities without overwriting your old headcanons. Personally, I think that even with all the growth they've had at the end of the comic, it's believable that Old Scott and Old Ramona could have a big argument that leads to them temporarily separating. Even when you've got good interpersonal skills, big arguments happen, and even when you've worked on them, your gut-reaction coping mechanisms still come up. Whatever the argument was, it's not hard for me to imagine avoidant Old Ramona to put up space between her husband instead of dealing with a stressful argument. It's easy to imagine dumbass Old Scott interpreting their separation as a call for permanent divorce, and no matter the age Ramona Flowers is never the kind of person to proactively call up an ex to resolve a misunderstanding. I think it's a really interesting and juicy narrative choice. If they had really landed the execution with this, I would outright love it and think it was a great addition to their love story.

PRO: DP input for the VR vault which is a giant Game Boy. Sick.

PRO: THE VIRTUAL BOY! (Or "Virtual Guuy")

PRO: For some reason Old Scott bro-ing it up with the Old Katayanagis and making retro throwback music in the garage works really well? Like for some reason I could see it happen even in the comics continuity if they (a) came back to life and (b) did a redemption arc for kidnapping Kim Pine.

PRO: Callback to episode 1's sugar daddy joke, and they genuinely had me wondering if they were going to make Wallace hooking up with Scott on the rebound a thing.

CON: Honesty I think they should have just committed to the (not really that old) Old Man Yaoi! Live a little!

PRO: Silver Fox-y Wallace Wells living up to his destiny of being a rich drunk trophy husband. And aging more gracefully than Scott despite going fully gray.

CON: You've got to wonder where the rest of Scott's friends are. Again, we've got to consider the runtime, and that he's in an unusual life situation, but in the comics when he gets into a similar depressive funk, a lot of his friends and family reach out to him, and he tries to reach out to them. A "17 missed calls from: Stephen Stills" or a "Kim doesn't talk to me anymore" line might have gone a long way to excuse their absence. It's also notable that despite his extremely unsuccessful music venture with the Old Katayanagis, Old Scott seems to still be unemployed, which is an example of his character development being cut short compared to the comics. More on that later.

PRO: Old Ramona's character design is as stellar and on-brand aesthetically as Old Scott's, plus the benefit that Ramona actually knows how to dress cool. Fucking baller.

PRO: Also she looks exactly her age (not given in the show but likely 38). Not surprising given she's got a healthier lifestyle than Scott, but I guarantee her natural hair color has gone completely white by now. You cannot be doing a full bleach and dye job every morning ma'am! Those follicles are stone dead!

PRO: It's incredibly endearing seeing her try to undo Old Scott's time travel plan through giving Young Neil the screenplay, and even more endearing when she calls Scott her one true love. The contradiction between her thinking of Scott as her true love and going through this massive effort to stop his time travel plan, but not being willing to go to Old Wallace's house and actually talk to Old Scott, is great. It's the closest the anime has gotten so far to giving Ramona her original character arc, which really got sidetracked by Young Ramona playing Columbo. More on that later.

PRO: For those who weren't keeping track of the meta Scott Pilgrim story, it now goes: Scott Pilgrim (real guy, old timeline) -> Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life, a memoir by Old Young Neil (memoir) -> Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life (movie script adapted by Old Ramona, credited to Young Neil) + Scott Pilgrim (real guy, young timeline) -> Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Life (failed movie and making-of documentary) -> Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Musical (adapted by Stephen Stills and Knives Chao). It's also entirely plausible that all of these versions eventually inspire Old Young Neil to write his memoir and create a bootstrap paradox. Incredible. Plus, the musical part continues the metacommentary by being roughly analogous to the real-life anime!

PRO: Delorean rollerskates, need I say more?! Actually, the choice to use this kind of Back to the Future "one timeline that corrects and adjusts when time travel happens" is really smart. Especially when Old Scott says he doesn't want to send Young Scott back because he seems to always end up marrying and separating from Ramona regardless, or when Old Ramona's script doesn't stop the eventual divorce and Old Scott getting unstable. In this part of the story, it's a great way to show how them trying to literally change the past instead of resolving their current issues will never get them anywhere.

PRO: Old Ramona and Young Ramona failing to synchronize on a vibe for their photo

CON: This is where I started to feel the ending getting rushed. Over the final episode, it felt like all the existing plotlines sped on to a quick resolution to make room for the very sudden AK field and Even Older Scott climax, which itself felt in a hurry to finish.

PRO: Scott apologizing to Knives and taking responsibility for being an asshole creep.

PRO: Knives saying she's glad he's not dead but she's glad that it broke them up. Get his ass, Knives! He's earned it!

CON: While these are super important scenes to include for both Knives' and Scott's character arcs, and I'm super glad they made it in since it'd be weird if they left it unspoken, it does feel unearned. Scott has barely been away a couple of days, and it doesn't seem like either he or Knives have had the time for serious introspection they would need to get to this point. Scott could have been inspired to be better than Old Scott's example, I guess, but he clearly thinks of Old Scott as a different guy and doesn't feel responsible for Old Scott's actions. Even if the memoir/movie/musical/VR robot experience showed him Old Scott apologizing at some point, I don't buy that he's emotionally intelligent enough to internalize doing it himself, and if he did it would still feel unearned because he'd basically be following a walkthrough rather than understanding it himself. And Knives? From her perspective, in a couple of days her inappropriately older fake boyfriend introduced her to his band, cheated on her, and then died. Since then she's been hanging out with his old band rather than any friends her age, and writing a musical about the life of her dead ex. She has not been in a position to realistically process that their relationship was fucked up. Both the apology and Knive's response, though necessary, feel rote rather than genuinely felt.

CON: Likewise, Ramona and Scott being so madly in love when reunited. They've known each other for one and a half dates, 1.75 at most. Scott is slightly ahead because of the VR memories and meeting Old Ramona, but not by much. Now, Scott is honestly the kind of guy to fall headfirst into a romantic fantasy with a woman he's barely met, but Ramona is not, as shown in the anime when she decides to pull back and not have sex on the first date. In the comics they take things pretty slow to accomodate her needs there, not moving in together, not saying "I love you" for a while, taking a break from each other midway through, they go for a couple volumes before she even tells him how old she is. It's super out of character for her to go head over heels like this without hesitation. She has been trying to solve his disappearance for a while, but that hasn't really caused her to get to know him any better. Someone might argue it's because she's seen how their lives play out in Old Ramona's movie, but that has uncomfortable elements of predestination and denying free will that I'd rather not think about. If I was trying to fix this, I'd maybe say that talking with her exes and making peace with them while looking for Scott helped her get over her issues, or that being more impulsive than comic/movie Ramona is actually timeloop-style the reason their future marriage is unstable. But that would all be fanfic, it's not present in the actual text, so I've got to call this one against the anime's favor. In general, the anime tends to take a very love-at-first-sight ("sparks") view on love, which is in opposition to the comics' more mature view of love as an ongoing practice. More on that later, maybe.

PRO: AK (Anti-Kiss) fields taken visually and conceptually straight from Evangelion's AT (Absolute Terror) fields. I'm a sucker for eva! This and a few other references seem to make clear that the creators are gunning for Takes Off to be to Scott Pilgrim as the Rebuilds are to NGE.

CON: I genuinely don't think Old Scott is smart enough to come up with this. I know the Old Katayanagis are said to have designed the nanomachines, but I don't mean the technical side, I mean the strategic side. Scott is pretty stupid, bless him. Old Scott is still not very smart. Scotts Pilgrim are just not the kind of guy to ever consider a Plan B. I just don't buy that Old Scott would ever think to himself "I should have a backup plan in case my first doesn't work," he's too confident and too stupid for that. The AK field feels like a red herring for Gordon Goose going evil again, since it's similar to the Glow and mind-control chip, but it ends up going away without much fanfare. Even Older Scott even admits they would always figure out a way to get rid of it, so it's kind of a lackluster final mystery.

PRO: All of the evil exes showing up the musical but being totally uninterested in fighting Scott is a fun reversal of the norm. Especially the Katayanagi twins being totally fine acting on prophesies of bro-ship from their special little vegan robot oracle.

PRO: Despite being a downgrade from megalomaniacal genuinely evil ultimate villain to greedy but affably evil Saturday-morning-cartoon villain, seeing Gordon Goose get back to sinister plots is a big plus, and "It wouldn't hurt any of us! ...Maybe some cast and crew," is a great line for him. Even when he tells Even Older Scott that he has no interest in what's going on and wants to go back to the play, though it's an unthinkable sentiment from obsessive comic/movie Gideon, the line goes out with enough confidence and disrespectful disinterest that for me it actually makes up for it!

PRO: In general, I love when a show gets an opportunity to bring the whole cast to the event, putting all the personalities on display. Especially a formal event, because then sometimes you get fun new outfit designs! In Takes Off it feels even more special because this isn't just all the characters getting together at Scott Pilgrim the Musical for a last hurrah, it's also metatextually all the creatives from previous Scott Pilgrim projects reuniting against the odds in Scott Pilgrim the Anime for a last hurrah.

P: Speaking of all the characters getting together, there is - by technicality - an appearance by Lisa Miller, one-hit-wonder extraordinaire, in the finale. She's in the crowd of graphic novel characters drawn in to populate the musical's audience, face partially obscured. I do not consider this a proper appearance and will still count the lack of Lisa against the anime. However, in the sprit of fairness, I will offer a partially obscured PRO for this cameo.

PRO: Even Older Scott has clearly given in to the Satsui no Hado! Design elements like the hair, bandana, raggedy gi, wrist wraps, and inexplicable tan all call to mind Akuma and Dark Ryu from Street Fighter. I wonder if the Shoryuken input for Old Scott's vault was intended to tie in to this?

PRO: Even Older Scott acts like Master Roshi even though he's only 47. That's only like, Bulma in Dragon Ball Super years, man! How are you that buff but aged that poorly?

CON: Even Older Scott's plan makes zero sense. You've seen Back to the Future. You can't kill your younger self, dude! Total paradox! You'll cease to exist and therefore can't have killed your past self and therefore your past self should exist blah blah blah.

PRO: Even Older Scott is absolutely stupid enough to have tried it anyway. Especially after 10 years isolation.

PRO: "Even Older Scott VS Everyone" and "The World VS Scott Pilgrim" are nice wordplay, I'm here for it.

CON: The confrontation between Young Scott (and associates) VS Even Older Scott lacks emotional stakes, since it kinda came out of nowhere. There's the AK field, but Even Older Scott says they would figure that out anyway. There's the barebones stakes of Even Older Scott turning everyone into spare change, but nobody really seems to be afraid of that as a threat, and it's confusing what that would even mean with the time loop. Their dialogue suggests kind of a philosophical conflict between Even Older Scott trying to control Young Scott's life, and Young Scott wanting to make his own choices, but that also seems undercut by the time loop: if Young Scott was actually going to make different choices, Even Older Scott wouldn't exist. Maybe this is just the dialogue having some trouble getting the conflict across? They could be going for Even Older Scott futilely trying to change the past, VS Young Scott wanting to have the freedom to make those choices even if it causes him to suffer in the future, "better to have loved and lost" and all that. That's thematically cohesive so I think it was their intention, but I don't think it was communicated well in the fight.

PRO: Nevermind anything else, the fight scene itself is fucking fantastic. Expressive and punchy animation everywhere, banger music, and a chance to show off just about every character's personality as they contribute to the fight! Even some characters who haven't had major animated sequences yet get a shot in the spotlight, and often with a bonus to boot, like Knives finally getting her trademark knives from the comics/movie! We get even more chemistry between the characters when they team up and work together for combo moves, so not only does it give a moment of glory to everyone's individual personality, it gives us a spectacle to the relationships they've built, too. The circumstances surrounding the fight might not make a lot of sense, it's unclear why they're fighting or what they're fighting over, but in HOW the cast fights this whole sequence evokes an astounding amount of character.

PRO: Even Older Ramona. Gets another great design. Actually looks her age, and good for it. Actually looks like Bulma in Dragon Ball Super.

PRO: Even Older Ramona, to her credit, returns her original character arc. She stops running away from the romantic messes she's left behind, and comes back to fix it. A+

CON: I don't buy that Young Ramona has internalized that message enough to mind-meld about it. Ramona after 13 years of marriage and 10 years to think about it, sure. But not Ramona on her third actual date with Scott, 3.25th at best.

PRO: Human Instrumentality Quantum Super Reimona I'm drowning in Evangelion references here

PRO: Super Ramona finalizes Ramona's missing character arc! It might be a bit rushed, but it is a complete character arc. It might have taken her 23 years longer than the comic, but hey, this is a different story working at a different scale. They got there in the end.

CON: Even Older Scott never really gets his character arc. Super Ramona gives him a second chance and reverses his villain arc, but he's really at the same place at 47 that he was at 23, which kinda sucks. But, more on that later.

PRO: Super Ramona's "it's never too late to try and mend what you've broken" ending still leaves open the possibility of a rekindled Scott/Ramona romance, and at the very least implies they stop isolating themselves and develop a healthier, friendlier relationship. As far as I can tell, this fully resolves the timeloop AND gives a relatively happy ending to a complicated romantic relationship, both of which are hard as fuck to write. I salute the writers. Even if Scott and Ramona are destined to have a falling out 13 years down the line, they're also destined to forgive each other after 23, and who knows, maybe they've got a chance to get back together again in after 24. It's a messier narrative than the comics to reach the same basic message, but in it's own special way it's still beautiful.

CON: It does kinda leave Scott and Ramona's non-romantic relationships in the lurch, though, after a decade-long absence. Even Older Wallace deserves a thousand apologies and a foot massage for putting up with these two.

PRO: I love a good "where are they now" sequence! Matthew, Gordon, and Julie settling their differences and sharing the evil plots amongst themselves. Young Neil driving the mario karts on movie sets. Stacey getting some eye candy at the café and resolving Julie's joke from earlier about Luke getting a job there. Good stuff.

PRO: Knives fully joining Sex Bob-omb is a particularly genius choice.

PRO: It's true. As an anglo Canadian, our French does suck. (Our schools can never decide whether to teach us Parisien or Québecois and we end up speaking neither)

CON: Is it bragging if a Netflix show includes a scene of a video rental place shutting down? Feels like... when a cat wants to show off the mouse it killed lol

PRO: Simon Pegg and Nick Frost eating Cornettos. Magnifique.

PRO: Also hey! It's Mobile! Wallace's boyfriend from the comics! He's also psychic! And I guess works for Nintendo also? Damn, he's the total package.

CON: No real representation for Lisa Miller, the world's best D-list failgirl! 0/10

CON: NO STEPHEN STILLS YAOI! I joke, but I do consider it a major flaw that Stephen Stills never gets to come out. The movie got a pass because he hadn't come out in the comics yet, but there's no excuse here. The subtly concealed subplot in the comics of him breaking up with Julie and coming out of the closet in the comics is one of my favorite parts, and in the anime all he gets is an ex-girlfriend with no reference to him coming out at all.

CON: In fact, almost all of the original supporting cast gets this treatment. Scott, Wallace, Stephen, Knives, Kim, Envy. Even arguably Ramona, despite being the new protagonist. While their jokes are fun and it's a treat to see their personalities on screen, their pre-existing character arcs get neutered, disappeared, or straight up reversed. Sure, though I hate to admit it, it makes sense to cut Lisa's character, since she has no reason to show up in the first place if Scott's gone. But the rest of the supporting cast were the heart of the original comics; Their complex development over the books is what made the comics so special in the first place, and it's a heart all adaptations and spinoffs since have mostly lacked. I want to go into more detail on how these characters got done dirty, but I'll save it for another post. I'll link it here if I ever finish it.

PRO: Through the whole show, it's clear everyone loves Scott Pilgrim in all its forms: comics, movie, video game, anime. Bryan Lee O'Malley, Edgar Wright, the entire movie/voice cast, Metric, Anamanaguchi, and now Science SARU clearly have a lot of passion for these characters. There's a ton of work put in to bring this to life that wouldn't happen if they didn't genuinely care for the series. You think Chris Evans isn't getting better offers?

PRO: THE FUCKIN PLUMTREE SONG THAT STARTED IT ALL. FUCK. YES. WHERE MY HALIGONIANS AT

A NOTE IF YOU'VE GOTTEN THIS FAR:

I know I've written a lot about how the anime doesn't compete with the comics, or where it's fallen short, but I want to be clear that I actually really really like the anime. I think it's great! It's clearly a labour of love. It's just a lot easier to write a lot of words analysing parts that fail than parts that succeed. Scott Pilgrim Takes Off succeds at A TON OF THINGS!

I would honestly say that it succeeds far more than the movie, and people love that movie, myself included! It's a cult classic! The Scott Pilgrim graphic novels are just that good that it's hard for spinoffs to match up. If you ask me they're some of the best comics ever made, but I'm long biased by my personal history with them. You can never really be neutral about a high school favorite.

I think "spinoff" there is the right word, despite the show's marketing. It's not an adaptation by any means. It's not a sequel. It's doing its own thing, and it did it really well. If you expected an adaptation, I understand your frustration, it's shit as an adaptation. But I'd encourage you to give it another chance as a spinoff, it has a lot of value to add to the whole Scott Pilgrim experience, just as much as the game, and just as much as the movie.

[rendevousz]

not a secret anymore

natasha romanoff x fem!teen!reader

summary: nat reveals a secret to the public when your class takes a learning journey to the tower.

requested: yes

warnings: might come off as half assed writing because this probably is one of my worst works i'm so sorry 😭😭

word count: 1681

notes: i'm so sorry i haven't been writing much, i've recently just gotten extremely busy so i had no time to sit down and write (this one was literally written between all the short breaks i had 😫) and i have a few requests piling up so i hope you guys can understand if they come later <3

"hi, y/n!" ally, an agent, greeted you as you, along with your classmates, walked through the east wing hallway of the tower. your classmates—except for peter, ned and mj— turned to look at you with confused looks.

your class was having a learning journey at the avengers tower and you had contemplated on calling in sick to avoid people who worked in the tower acknowledging you around your classmates.

you were actually an avenger—yeah, crazy—, having been rescued during one of the many avengers' hostage rescue missions few years ago. you were able to single-handedly take down a few of your captors, hence why the team took interest in you then.

now, though you had been trained enough, they decided to keep you a secret in order to protect you. lord knows how many people would try hurt you if they ever found out the avengers had a new, teenage recruit. peter was technically still safe as his alter-ego is masked so you had no choice but to only go on missions that weren't in the public eye.

you also lived in the tower so the agents and staff were undoubtedly familiar with you, some even friends with you, just like ally, who had just passed by with a wave of her hand at you before turning the corner.

"did that lady just acknowledge you?" an annoying voice spoke from beside you in a mocking tone. you gulped, not wanting to respond to flash's irrelevant question.

"hey, loser, i'm talking to you," he nudged your arm with his elbow and you held the urge to grab it and flip his whole body upside down. it's not like you couldn't—you had the skills, obviously— but it's the fact that you didn't want to get in trouble for that.

you ended up keeping quiet, like you always did whenever the boy taunted you. peter taught you to do just that. if it were up to you, flash's stupid face wouldn't even dare to show itself in front of you anymore.

speaking of peter, he was nowhere to be seen by now. you internally rolled your eyes. it had only been two minutes and they were already gone. peter was probably showing them around the place. you had no idea how your teacher didn't notice the three of them missing from your group. you were so going to kill them for ditching you and leaving you alone when they knew they were your only friends. they were also the reason why flash still had his head to this day because they'd stop you from doing anything rash. now you weren't sure if flash would be safe from your fury.

"you probably work here as a cleaner on the weekends or something, huh? that's the only way people here would know you," flash jeered. you let out a breath, trying to control your anger towards the boy.

you rolled your eyes, opting to deliberately ignore his insults and walk away instead, hoping you'll bump into those three idiots of friends of yours.

"did you just ignore me?" flash asked incredulously, as if it was a crime to ignore his annoying ass. he pulled you back by your back collar, effectively halting you in your spot.

by instinct, you grabbed his hand that was on your collar, twisting it and turning his whole body around, pinning him against the wall with his twisted arm pressed against his back. it happened in just two seconds which totally caught flash off guard, the boy groaning in pain as he begged you to let him free.

you could hear a series of gasps from all around you and you internally groaned. this is why you always ignored flash's taunting. you didn't want to attract attention to yourself and have people wonder how you could defend yourself so well. but flash just had to provoke you. especially here, out of all places.

"what's going on here?" you heard a familiar voice ask and you sighed.

"oh my gosh! it's the black widow!"

"miss romanoff!"

"oh my gosh, i'm gonna need to get a picture for my mum later, she's gonna freak out!"

you stepped away from flash, releasing him as he dramatically kept rubbing at his arm. as if you even put that much pressure. flash smirked, seeing this as a chance to complain about you to an official avenger.

"this girl right here," flash points an accusing finger at you with a glare, like he wasn't just practically begging for his life twenty seconds ago. "attacked me."

you rolled your eyes, unamused. "i hardly attacked him." you told nat. the woman turned to you, an eyebrow raised as she gave you a knowing look. "this...?" she trailed off and you nodded, knowing what she was insinuating. you'd told her about flash one too many times for her not to immediately figure out who he is from a crowd of students.

"flash thompson. heard a lot about you," she turned to the boy. flash's face lit up, thinking he must've made a name for himself or something that even the black widow knew him. little did he know he did, but not for good reasons.

"i would prefer if you stop messing with y/n/n." nat gave him a sharp look and that grin was immediately wiped off his face. "i– y/n/n?" he stuttered, confused that the natasha romanoff is calling you by a nickname.

"you do know she can kick your ass if she wanted to, right? she's been silent all this while because she didn't want to hurt you but you just never seem to learn, huh?" nat took slow, calculated steps towards him until she was towering over him.

"she doesn't need anyone to protect her because she's fully capable of that but i'm just here to warn you, kid, that she, is not to be meddled with. i'm saying this for your own good, flash thompson. she's capable of much worse than whatever she just did to you. so if i hear you messing around with her or any of her friends," she pauses before continuing with a whisper. "i'll close one eye on whatever she wants to do with you."

you wished you could've taken a picture of the dead scared look on flash's face; it was priceless. you turned to nat once she stepped away from him and she put an arm around your shoulder, leading you both away from the watching crowd.

"i–i'm sorry, miss romanoff," you could hear one of your teachers say and nat stopped, effectively stopping you too as she had you in her hold. "but miss y/l/n is on a learning journey with us and she'll miss the tour of the tower if she leaves with you. we'll be discussing a lot regarding this trip in class and she won't understand what we talk about if she misses this tour. i hope you understand." he spoke nervously.

"with all due respect, y/n's seen the whole tower already," she smiles at him but you could tell it was fake. "even the avengers' residential floors which are closed to the public and most employees of the tower."

your teacher looked at her wide-eyed, mouth open but nothing coming out. nat smiles a fake one once again. "now if you'll excuse us, the both of us have avenger duties to attend to."

gasps could be heard all around you and in the midst of it all, your best friends came back and you made eye contact with them, all of them having the same shocked look on their face.

"avenger duties?! nat, what are you doing?!" you whisper-yelled at the woman who seemed to be enjoying the reactions of your classmates and teachers.

"y/n!" peter ran over to you, your other friends following suit. "oh, um hi miss romanoff," he greets shyly. "thanks a lot, guys, look what happened." you spoke sarcastically, rolling your eyes at them. nat proceeded to drag you away from your friends and the last thing you saw was them mouthing apologies and you half-heartedly mouthing to them back that it was fine.

"relax, y/n/n, the public were about to find out soon anyways." nat said nonchalantly. "what?!" you exclaimed once you two were in a different hallway.

"yeah, you're gonna have press this weekend for this. we're gonna officially announce you to the world as an avenger." she once again says nonchalantly, as if this wasn't the first time you were hearing this. "wait, wait, wait, seriously?" you asked in disbelief. no one had told you anything.

"yeah, i—ohh yeah, you don't know yet," nat remembers and you give her an unimpressed look. she wasn't usually this dumb; she only showed this side of her to you. "sorry, i uh, yeah.. i was supposed to come get you for this. meeting with fury and the rest, yknow?" she tells you and you nodded slowly, taking in the information.

"but tell me it didn't feel good that you got to do that to flash," the woman states excitedly and you playfully rolled your eyes at her. "you got to do something. i'm practically an empty threat to him," you stated matter-of-factly.

"not after this weekend you're not. he'll be afraid of you after. that's what you get for being a smelly bully." you couldn't help the little smile on your face. she really sounded like a child right now and it was adorable.

"alright, natty, whatever you say. let's go before fury releases his fury." you look at her hopefully, waiting for her to laugh at your joke which she responded with an unimpressed look. that of course didn't work as you two burst out laughing looking at each other's faces.

you walked alongside her, the woman resting an arm around your shoulder. you smiled up at her as she talked about her day.

god, you couldn't wait to be able to finally walk out in public with these people you considered family.

taglist <3

@amourtentiaa @rqmanoff @abitofeverythinggg @andreasworlsboring101 @cay-writes-fan-fiction514 @teenwonder @sevenmorningstars @fleurlovesbucky @marauvdersfate

[xneens]

side to side

Warnings: swearing

Word count: 4.6k

Summary: In which you're performing your hit single in front of your fellow Avengers cast-mates and Chris can't seem to take his eyes off of you, catching the attention of a few cameras.

"I'm here with the biggest pop-star of this generation, and she plays the very talented daughter of Tony Stark," the interviewer announced your name, smiling brightly at you as the camera panned your way. The hundreds of thousands of fans at home screaming when your face appeared. "How do you feel with all your nominations tonight?"

You smiled at the camera, giving a small wave at the people watching at home. "Honestly, I'm just glad I was even considered for these nominations. I mean, my girls Taylor, and Billie...they're amazing and I'm so happy to be put in the same category as them."

The lady grinned at you, her eyes twinkling. Or maybe it was her sparkly dress, the fabric nearly blinding you with how it shined under the lights. "If you ask me, you've got a pretty good chance at winning. I mean, your hit single—Side to Side—surpassed, like, a billion views in just a month? That's impressive."

"Well, I couldn't have done it without my fans." you replied, winking at the camera.

It was that time of the year again, where every artist, actor, and YouTuber hit the stage for the People's Choice Awards. With your crazy schedule, and the lack of sleep, you had planned to skip the award show until your friend, and co-star, Chris Evans—Captain America himself—convinced you otherwise. Even with the categories you've been nominated for had been more than a handful, but it was the begging and constant complaining from Chris that made you get off your tired ass and put it into a tight dress.

Your hit single, Side to Side, had everyone anticipated for your performance, unsure if you would be performing until the producers had put your name into the advertisement, making fans blow up Twitter. You were sure they had advertised your own song, along with your movie nominations, more than you ever had.

With nominations of Movie of the Year (Avengers: Infinity War), Action Movie of the Year (Avengers: Infinity War), Female Movie Star of the Year (Amara Stark), Female Artist of the Year, Song of the Year (Side to Side), Music Video of the Year (Into You), Beauty Influencer of the Year, and Social Celebrity of the Year, you had your hands full, which had only made your manager glow with happiness.

"Of course!" the interviewer agreed, glancing at the teleprompter filled with tiny words. "It was rumored that you wouldn't be coming, and a lot of us were upset, including me. Was that just a rumor or..."

"Actually, it's not that far off. I'm fucking—oh, shit—oh no!" you gasped, covering your mouth before anymore foul words could come out on live television. Instead of correcting you, the lady laughed, patting your arm softly. "Can't say that on tv. My bad. I, uh, with everything going on, I've been really tired, and I haven't slept in a week. I just wanted to chill, and accept my nominations at home but someone convinced me to come. So, if I say or do anything ridiculous tonight, I'm blaming him and my lack of sleep."

She nodded, clapping slowly. "I think that's fair. Is that someone, your onscreen father, RDJ?"

"He was one of the many people who unsuccessfully changed my mind, but no, it was Chris Evans. He promised me a day with his adorable dog, Dodger, and I couldn't refuse." you said, grinning at how his face had changed from hopeless to cocky as soon as he brought up Dodger.

"If I'm remembering this correctly, Chris Evans is that very handsome man you had kissed in your music video earlier this year. Into You, right? How do you feel kissing one of your co-stars outside of the movies your working on?"

"Technically, it was still acting, and I have kissed him before, so it wasn't awkward at all." you answered, glad Chris had accepted the role. Not only had it sky-rocketed the views and streams, but it made you feel better that it was his lips you were kissing and not a random model's. Yet, it didn't feel as professional as it had before when you pulled away after a take.

In scenes where you had to kiss the Boston actor, it was as professional as kicking Anthony Mackie's ass in Civil War but the kisses you shared on the set of the music video was definitely more personal. At the time, you had brushed it off as Chris being recently single, but now that you had broken up with Henry, you started questioning it again.

The interviewer nodded, squinting once more to read the words off the teleprompter before asking you another question that would certainly make the headlines. "I've been reading up on all those juicy tabloids and I've got one question that would satisfy my curiosity. Was Into You written about Henry Cavill or Tom Ellis?"

Usually, that type of question made you change the subject or altogether avoid the matter but this time, you wanted to joke about your failed engagement. "Henry, but Side to Side was written about Tom since I wanted more Grammy's considering the last album I put out won me a few. But this time, I'm gonna do it without an engagement."

The woman faked a laugh, surprised by the blunt honesty of your answer. "Um, you certainly do have a thing for British men, eh? I don't want to keep you up, but one more thing, for the fans. They've been dying to know if there's anything going on between you and Chris Evans. Any tea you wanna spill?"

"There's none to spill. We're just friends but it's always amusing scrolling through Twitter to find these edits of us." you replied, fidgeting slightly with the hem of your dress. Like usual, you had wondered if you should've worn something less extra but you had let your stylist play dress up with you for the past few months.

"Of course. Well, good luck to you, and I can't wait to see your performance." she said, giving you a little pat on the shoulders before announcing your name once again.

You got off the little platform, immediately taking Chris' awaiting hand, holding onto it as you climbed down the steps in your dangerous stilettos. Sighing, you leaned on him, trying to avoid the blinding camera flashes. "That was more exhausting than I thought it would be. You need to get me some caffeine after this is over because there's no way I'm making it to the after show without at least a few cans of Red Bull."

"So dramatic." Chris grinned, childishly sticking his tongue out as he guided you down the red carpet, stopping when told to take a picture. He let go of your hand, only to wrap it around your waist as you posed for the pictures. "Are you going to the after party?"

Posing seriously for a few seconds, you let your smile back on your face, facing the man beside you. "I was thinking about it, take a few photos, and head back home. Aren't you?"

"Actually, I was thinking we could ditch it and just hang out. You know, I did promise you some time with Dodger and you could waste a couple hours sleeping." he replied, his hand tightening ever so slightly on your waist. Flashing you a shit-eating smirk, he nudged you a little, pulling you away from the blinding flashes. "What do you say?"

You opened your mouth to answer only to be cut off by your manager, Alexandre coming out of nowhere to rip you away from Chris' arms. The latin man sighed in annoyance, glancing at his watch while giving you the look you've seen too many times before. "You're supposed to be in wardrobe right now. Get your ass backstage, and change before you miss your own performance. As for you, Mr. Evans, Megan wants your ass in a chair."

"I'll see you after." you say, getting dragged by your manager, winking at the actor before walking towards the changing area, the cameras following you until they couldn't enter the area.

Getting ready before a huge performance always calmed you down, maybe it was the smell of makeup or the feel of designer clothing made especially for you, but something about it made you feel comfortable and cozy. It was like a routine, especially with all the music videos and movies you had to film, the makeup, the hair.

They made you sit back, giving you your phone like a child while they made you even more sparkly than before, making sure you'd stand out against the flashing lights during the performance. A performance you made sure no one would ever forget. Smiling, you let your thoughts drift back to a certain super soldier as you were pampered.

—

"Welcome to the People's Choice Awards!"

The room darkened, the blue and pinks lights focusing on the stage as cameras all turned towards your shadow. Making sure your mic was set properly, tried to see past the darkness, to see a familiar face or two but with the headache coming on from the tight half-ponytail didn't help your case. The music started, the beat vibrating, you flipped your hair, and started.

"I've been there all night

I've been there all day (Nicki Minaj)

And boy, got me walkin' side to side (Let then hoes know)"

You rode the bike, belting out in your microphone, the attached headset limiting your movements a little. Gripping the handles, you made eye contact at the camera to your left, winking at it as you pedaled.

"I'm talkin' to ya

See you standing over there with your body

Feeling like I wanna rock with your body

And we don't gotta think 'bout nothin'

I'm comin' at ya

'Cause I know you got a bad reputation

Doesn't matter, 'cause you give me temptation

And we don't gotta think 'bout nothin'"

As you had sung, your eyes had adjusted to the bright spotlight focused on you, seeing a shadow of the one person you wanted to make you walk side to side. While you had answered the reporter's question, you hadn't been completely honest. Some of the lyrics had been written for the Bostonian; or to be more exact, your sex fantasies. With the chorus coming up, you let go of the handles, trying not to fall on your ass as you clapped your hands above your head, the claps matching the beat.

"These friends keep talkin' way too much

Say I should give you up

Can't hear them, no, 'cause I..."

Trying to be bold, you stared at him, his face in particular. The spotlight had blinded you so much that you couldn't see what his reaction was—or anyone's for that matter—but maybe it was a good thing. After all, his gaze always made you blush no matter how hard you tried not to. Pedaling faster, you threw your head back, hoping the motion would draw everyone's—Chris'—eyes on your chest.

"I've been here all night

I've been here all day

And boy, got me walkin' side to side

I've been here all night

I've been here all day

And boy, got me walkin' side to side"

With the help of a shirtless dancer, you got off your bike, taking the sheer jacket from him, and putting it on as you walked towards the front of the stage, moving your hips in to the beat of the song. Resting a hand on a shirtless dancer, you positioned yourself so you were grinding your ass against his crotch, throwing back an arm around his neck.

"Been tryna hide it

Baby, what's it gonna hurt if they don't know?

Makin' everybody think that we solo

Just as long as you know you got me

And boy, I got ya

'Cause tonight I'm making deal with the devil

And I know it's gonna get me in trouble

Just as long as you know you got me"

Sashaying to the little balance beam at the front of the stage, you made sure your hips swayed more than usual.

"These friends keep talkin' way too much

Say I should give you up

Can't hear them, no, 'cause I...

"I've been here all night

I've been here all day

And boy, got me walkin' side to side

I've been here all night

I've been here all day

And boy, got me walkin' side to side"

A few seconds after your note ended, you strike a pose on the balance beam, posing for a few more seconds while the cameras turned their attention away from you and onto the queen of rap herself: Nicki Minaj. The leather, pink bodysuit was identical to yours except for the color, her attitude fitting the badass outfit. She began to walk towards the stage, never breaking eye contact with the camera in front of her while the men pretending to work out to the choreo.

"Uh, yeah

This the new style with the fresh type of flow

Wrist icicle, ride dick bicycle

Come through yo, get you this type of blow

If you want a ménage, I got a tricycle

All these bitches' flows is my mini-me

Body smoking, so they call me Young Nicki Chimney

Rappers in they feelings 'cause they feelin' me

Uh, I-I give zero fucks and I got zero chill in me

Kissing me, copped the blue box that say Tiffany

Curry with the shot, just tell 'em to call me Stephanie

Gun pop, then I make my gum pop

I'm the queen of rap"

By the time she had finished her verse, you had caught up with the multitasking of both working out and singing, able to use your full singing capabilities for your high note. Nicki joined you on stage, hyping up the crowd while you built up for the high note, almost every camera pointed at you except for the one focused on capturing the headline-worthy expression slapped on Chris' face.

"These friends keep talkin' way too much

Say I should give em up

Can't hear them, no, 'cause I...

"I've been here all night (Been here all night, baby)

I've been here all day (Been here all night, baby)

And boy, got me walkin' side to side (Side to side)

I've been here all night (Been here all night, baby)

I've been here all day (Been here all day, baby) (Ooh, baby)

And boy, got me walkin' side to side (Side to side)"

Both you and Nicki motioned for the dancers to come towards you, curling your index finger at the sexy men. Singing the refrain, you both made them drop to their knees in front of you, as if they were kneeling at your command.

Just as the last note was sung, everyone clapped, the majority standing up, and more cheered. You noticed Chris hadn't done either, still sitting in his motionless while two camera men pointed their cameras at him. Your eyebrows furrowed, thankfully after the spotlight had shifted over to the miniature stage where the two hosts were babbling about nominations.

You were ushered off the stage along with the queen of rap herself, taking a few backstage photos before quickly returning back to your dressing room to change into your tailored dress. Your mind had wandered to why Chris hadn't applauded—not that he was obliged too, but a little something would've nice, especially with all the days put into the performance.

Taking a deep breath, you entered the big room, filled with your co-stars and other A-list celebrities. Little did you know you'd find out the reason to your question in the morning.

—

The loud ringtone woke you up, the sound obnoxious and borderline abuse to your ears. Beside you, Chris groaned, rolling onto his stomach, trying to muffle the sound of the call with his arm draped over his head. Putting him out his misery, you lazily reached for your phone, pressing the green button with dread, seeing the name across the screen.

"Hello—"

"You're trending on Twitter." Alexandre announced, happy with the results of the previous awards show. While it wasn't something as big as a Grammy or Oscar, judging by the amount of awards you had taken home, you became the people's favorite. "Hold on, lemme rephrase that. You and Chris are trending. Number one, world wide."

Glancing at the man sleeping beside you, you sat up, confused by the information given to you. You blamed Chris for making you stay up so late for your confusion. "Um, why? Did I accidentally have another nip slip?"

"What the hell?" Chris mumbled, rolling onto his back, his arm grazing your bare stomach. He immediately took it back, sitting up to look over your puzzled face. "What's going on?"

You shrugged, putting your phone on speaker so Alexandre could explain. Your manager chuckled, knowing you had stayed the night with Chris. He was just waiting for the day you'd finally have the guts to speak about the growing sexual tension. "Okay, Alex, explain."

"As much as I would love to go into full detail, I have other stuff to do so, I'm going to give you the basics. Chris' reaction to your performance went viral, people are shipping the both of you, and there's been thousands of memes made." Alexandre replied, a smile evident in his voice. "Anyways, I have to go. Got some interviews to schedule. Have fun getting your way out of this, Chris."

Your phone screen went back to the home screen, a picture of your family dog, Buster, smiling widely. Looking at Chris, you saw his eyes widened, his hands coming to rest of his face in embarrassment as he fell back onto the bed with a bounce, his head nearly hitting the headboard. "Oh, fuck."

"Are you going to show me what your face looked like or do I have to scroll through Twitter until I find it? Oh! Maybe they edited it in my performance." you thought out load, tapping on the YouTube app. You hadn't trusted yourself enough to log into your official account, knowing you'd probably make a mistake so you opted for having a secondary account where you could watch cat videos without the anxiety of posting something stupid.

Chris' hand snatched your phone away, tucking it in his pocket, the sweats he had slept in was somehow wrinkled, and his shirt damp from the warmth. "You wanna get some food? I'll cook some bacon but you'll have to make the pancakes 'cause the last time—"

"I wanna see your reaction." you whined, reaching across his stomach for your phone. Chris turned his body away from you, shielding the phone from your reach. "Chris!"

He waved your attempt away, rolling off the bed, his feet hitting the floor before you could fall back on the mattress.You poured, getting on all fours, crawling towards the edge. Chris took a step back, brows furrowing. "It's not important. Let's get you some food."

"Fine." you mumbled, an idea making you light up. Rolling off the bed, you glanced at his phone on the nightstand, exposed and easy to take. With quick reflexes, you grabbed his phone, rolling back on the bed until you reached the other side, making it impossible for him to reach for his phone back.

"Hey!" the Bostonian shouted, launching himself on the bed in attempt to get his phone back. He made a noise as you rushed out of your room, locking yourself in the nearby bathroom, laughing evilly when he threw himself at the door. He yelled out your name, his fist banging on the door. "I'm serious! Don't!"

Ignoring his begging, you opened his phone with your thumbprint. How ironic how much he didn't want you to look at his phone when he was the one who insisted you have the password to it. His arguments became louder as you opened up his Twitter, immediately heading to the trending section, seeing both your names at the number one spot.

"Damn, I look hot." you joked out loud, making Chris silent for a second before pleading for you not to continue. You smirked, scrolling through the tweets, trying to find his reaction. "Jesus Christ, what the hell happened to you? Did you fall on your face or something?"

Chris groaned, banging his head on the door in defeat as he heard your almost inaudible gasp, that quickly turned into little giggles. If he wasn't so embarrassed, he would've broken the door down to hold you in his arms. "Oh, no."

Bursting out into hard laughter, you fell into the large bathtub, hitting your head on the wall but you couldn't care less. The expression on his face during your performance had been borderline comical, the wide eyes, the jaw hanging open, the open hand resting on his chin while his eyes stayed strained on you the whole time, never wavering from your body, the sexy choreography making his jeans tight.

Cackling like the Wicked Witch of the West, tears ran down your cheeks, your stomach cramping from the maniacal laughter. Lifting yourself up from the tub, you stumbled to the door, your loud laugh ringing out towards the whole house. You let Chris in the bathroom, his phone quickly taken from your hand but it was too late. The blush on his cheeks wasn't going away anytime soon. You leaned against him, your head resting on his chest, while you panted out a question. "Why did you look like you were trying to attract flies in your mouth?"

Chris groaned again, covering his eyes with a hand while the other rested on your back. "You're not going to let me live this down, are you?"

"Oh, God, no." you giggled, wiping the tears away, beginning to calm down. Glancing up at him, you noticed everything above the shoulders was gleaming red, the embarrassment too unbearable for him. "Chris, you looked exactly like the first time we were forced to share a bed together."

"Yeah, you have that affect on me."

"You gonna tell me why you looked so ... shocked? Or do I have to search through Twitter and go with whatever fan theory makes the most sense?" you asked, unable to keep the smug grin off your face. Chris closed his eyes, wishing he hadn't made you come to the awards show in the first place. You raised an eyebrow, fingers itching towards his phone. "You know I'll do it, Evans."

The man raised his hands, taking them off of you as he paced around the bathroom, deciding if this embarrassing moment was the right time to finally confess. "It's just, you know, the dance was so ... sexual and hot that I probably wasn't the only one looking at you like that. You can't exactly blame me for being shocked, watching the girl I'm in love with—"

Chris stopped as you be watched the colors drain out of your face, immediately freezing when he realized what he had said. Both of you stared at each other, eyes wide, not moving a muscle, barely blinking; the atmosphere so tense neither of you were breathing, waiting for the other to talk. But neither of you wanted to go first, terrified.

It wasn't until you started to feel dizzy that you realized you hadn't been breathing, letting out a huge breath, trying to relax while Chris did the same, his hands shaking, a nervous tick he got whenever he was anxious. You got the courage to speak first.

"What?"

It was better than nothing.

Chris was so nervous he nearly ran out of the room. There wasn't some kind of handbook or script he could read, helping him tell one of his best friends how head over heels he was for her. So, he said what his brain was stewing. "What?"

"What—what?" you replied, unsure if he even said the L word, so lightheaded by the sudden confession.

The actor stilled, eyes widening even further, while his eyebrows shot up his forehead. "What?"

"What?"

"What?"

"Say what one more time, Evans, and I will make nothing but mac and cheese for the rest of your stay." you threatened softly, getting tired of not having an answer to your one-worded question.

Chris took a deep breath, hands trembling as he clasped them together, hoping to find the right words, hoping his inner thoughts would come out clear, giving you the answer you asked for. "I'm sorry. What do you want me to say?"

"What you were saying before. You know, before you looked like you saw a ghost and almost stopped breathing. I think that would be a good start." you replied, backing up to take a seat on the plush chair. Chris mirrored your actions, putting down the lid to the toilet before sitting down.

"This isn't the way I wanted you to find out." Chris whispered, his blue eyes trained on the emotions that flashed on your face. Your uncertainty of the situation didn't help his anxiety.

"Okay, um, were you going to tell me in the first place?" you asked, playing with the hem of your shirt—it had been a borrowed Patriots shirt from him. Looking back, you realized all the little things he'd done hadn't been because his platonic love for you. "Or were you just going to keep letting it be this way?"

Fidgeting with his hands, Chris peered through his eyelashes, seeing the hurt flash across your face before you quickly composed it. "Scott was hyping me up, trying to convince me to tell you before you got into another relationship. Do you know the real reason I broke up with Jenny? It hurt like hell when you announced you were engaged. Fuck, I couldn't even pretend to be happy because you were going to have the life I wanted with you, with someone who wasn't me. It was selfish and I got really mad at myself for being a dick."

"But—"

"And then the horrible, horrible relief I felt when you called off the engagement." Chris continued, his heart clenching. "Truth to be told, that was the day I found out I was in love with you, breaking things off with Jenny. Of course, I wanted to wait until you moved on, hoping to be the friend you went to but with my schedule, that was impossible. So, you seemed out comfort in Henry fucking Cavill."

"You're in love with me?" you whispered, hoping this wasn't some kind of cruel dream. If it was, you wouldn't mind staying.

The actor nodded, waiting for you to call him names and rush out. "Yes. You can leave or slap me or whatever you want to do but I love you."

You got up, running a hand through your hair. "Okay."

Chris' heart sank, wishing for any other kind of reaction, wishing you'd do something. Taking a deep breath, he got up. "Is this a goodbye?"

Frowning, you walked up to him, taking his face between with your hands, pressing your lips softly to his. You could feel his heart beat, the little organ beating so hard. You pulled away before he could recover from his shock, before he could kiss you back.

"Hello."

[dirtyrottenraskel]

my take on yueki's personalities

yue 

notes / personality

cocky (but also like understated confidence - r e g a l af) 

kind of a nerd

maybe a little entitled, and a little bratty and suki loves to indulge her or to rile her up depending on her mood

books

seems soft but made of steel

strong sense of duty

socially intelligent - can be manipulative and suki (the dork) thinks it is so hot 

aloof queen bee typa beat

supportive, both in ur day to day and in going after your big moral life goals 

deep water - steady and powerful, often underestimated

untold depths, private yet surprisingly nurturing - master of deflecting away from herself

political nerd - well read, and when she has someone she trusts not to take advantage of her, she goes OFF 

distrusting of most people, has been used and ignored and underestimated her whole life

patient - homegirl knows how to play the long game

excellent at pai sho / chess 

she and suki have epic battles of wits - dif types of strategy but both are really into it and get a little too competitive (multiple board games have had to be replaced over the years)

loves travel bc wasn’t allowed to much, esp when she was sick 

was super repressed growing up - never let her be herself or really have any sort of independence

used to sneak out and wander around in rebellion and casually sabotage plans and decisions she didn’t agree with 

introverted, many opinions but keeps them to herself, discreet but well spoken

weaponizes secrets and information - doesn’t often use it but...she could

definitlyyyyy worries and overthinks and re-evaluates - worries ab social politics a lot

obsessive about picking things - wants it to be perfect

shes growing into her confidence as a leader

prefers quite intimate places

incredibly romantic

classic lit

planner for the future - visionary

kind / sweet / gentle - yes, but that’s also her “front” to a degree (seriously, i feel like she gets painted as so sweet and submissive and one dimensional by the fandom a lot of times and it freakin kills me)

INFJ-T (The Advocate) ((yes this is from 16p which i know is not super accurate but u can still catch her overall vibes from it ya know)

Creative/insightful/principled/compassionate/altruistic

sensitive/reluctant to open up/perfectionist/prone to burnout/not a fan of the ordinary

friendships / relationships

(<> indicates that they’re one of her best friends)

sokka - puppy love crushes, laugh ab it now, get into deep late night talks about responsibilities and leading, water tribe culture, prank wars (no one believes sokka when he says yue is a mean prank master (expect suki comes to see it in action lol))

katara - <> badass women friendship, totally would go to matches and protests together, tough girl shit, waterbending practice/duels - start of cautious, but then get rough in a good way bc they trust each other, they do water tribe food adventures together

toph - indulges her chaos, bonding over stupid royal upbringings, odd yet weirdly endearing pair

zuko - both sort of standoffish gay royals, but once they come to see that they are friends - take up similar spaces though, so only hang out in a group or rarely by themselves, they do hang out at like political parties and stuff when they get more comfortable together

aang - <> he has an impressive world view, yue is super studied and well read, so she and aang nerd out over past cultures together, and also their peace keeping nature, they have tea together often - usually after she and katara wipe the floor w/ each other

clothing / aesthetic:

blues and pale colors

classy and understated wealth

like those cute feminine button down shirts

dresses

like cold weather classy

complicated braids

sort of soft girl aesthetic?

pleated skirts !!!

i feel like she would wear ethically sourced fur (i don’t wear fur but idk how to get it in an ethical way - maybe it’s just fake??)

knit sweaters and skinny jeans and heeled ankle boots

light academia !!!

hella funky earrings - to mark her native pride and also cuz gay

from my readings, tattoos have a lot of cultural significance for Inuit women, and so i feel like yue would totally have some (when she comes of age ofc) 

suki

notes / personality 

extroverted 

also very strategic 

more spontaneous tho - will totally calculate the odds in a spilt second in her head and then just go for it

like still a careful planner, but willing to say fuck it, yolo if it seems right 

reflects on her mistakes, but more in like a healthy way - unless it was a leadership mistake, then it eats her up inside - worries more ab keeping her girls safe and making the right call

likes lively places

total bashful romantic

manages the present and the short term - realist

loves to do lists 

a little punch happy - loves to make violent threats, but also does it out of excitement and she’s just a really physical person tbh

steady, can come off as stubborn and abrasive but she really just wants what’s best for everyone she loves

harsh on herself and worries about her girls a lot 

always ends up in the oddest situations 

totally would kick someone’s ass for being racist/sexist/homophobic/etc 

dedicated to her training and her regime 

not a great cook, but she can manage 

would drink monsters 

has a weird relationship with femininity - took her awhile to reconcile strength and toughness and being assertive and aggressive with also wanting to feel pretty and feminine and embracing being a girl and how those things can coincide and amplify each other

abandonment issues - parents absent/dead 

was imprisoned - obvi she had several almost successful escape attempts, but she got really close to breaking 

was incredibly independent really early, grew up really fast and tries to make up for that now by sometimes being reckless 

tough/assertive/woman of action 

dry sense of humor/sarcastic - not good at nickname/pun humor tho

practical/dedicated/strong-willed/direct/honest/reliable/loyal/patient

stubborn/judgmental/difficult to relax/difficulty expressing emotions/too selfless 

friendships / relationships

(<> indicates that they’re one of her best friends)

sokka - <>  man they’re like platonic soulmates - she beat him up, and now they spar all the time, totally funny and crack jokes all the time, go skating together, they do shitty art together, and then show their lovers after zuko and yue come back from their high society mixers, broke her out of prison, m/f friendship !!! 

katara - also sparring buddies (suki will throw down at any literally moment (and tbh so will katara)), not close but will hang in a group - go to each other for advice 

toph - <> listen these two wreak havoc together, they help each other out a lot, i feel like they’re shopping buddies (similar enough style to frequent the same shops) toph knows suki won’t judge her for wanting to feel pretty and suki knows toph will be honest, they are both blunt sarcastic assholes and get along like a house on fire 

zuko - <> shows zuko how to like,,,enjoy things (and how to let go of some of that pressure to be always right and the adult and in charge bc they were raised with so much responsibility on their shoulders even tho they were just kids)? she is also super protective of him (once she trusts him), one of the only ppl who can match suki fully in hand to hand combat, both do the Disappointed Parent Look when the group falls into chaos, but by themselves, the two of them end up in hijinks

aang- suki enjoys his optimism and they’re just chill bros, they love exploring abandoned placed together 

clothing / aesthetic

sporty and skater mixed 

ripped jeans, crewnecks, vans 

green and yellow and dark red 

gym clothes/athleisure - lifting style gym clothes - cut off t-shirts and bike shorts

skirts too, likes to play into femininity

she’s a gold jewelry kinda girl - but stuff that won’t hinder her movements 

necklaces that end in the hollow of her throat & occasionally rings

definitely cuffs all of her jeans (it’s just bisexual culture ya know)

so many crop tops - some came like that, some were more of a diy project

yueki’s relationship!!!

nerd/jock solidarity 

feel the burden of responsibility and the weight on their shoulders 

they create a safe space between them, full of trust and warmth and vulnerability 

yue will read suki sappy passages from poetry books while suki polishes her fans 

they slow dance in the kitchen a lot 

they get good at ordering takeout - and they have some weird decision making process that only they understand - bc neither of them are great cooks 

yue would feel jealous of suki and sokka, if it weren’t for how stupid in love sokka was with zuko and yue can see that suki really only has eyes for her 

yue is taller than suki and it amuses her to no end to pick suki up and carry her away from a fight (we all know suki could get away if she wanted to, but when ur hot tall sexy gf throws u over her shoulder,,,,,,u don’t complain)

joke they’ve adopted kataang and zukka, bc they’re all dummies, but in reality every last one of them is stupid LMAO 

they love to do each other’s hair and it’s like super intimate and really cute 

sometimes it’s these epic elaborate hairstyles and then at other times, they try to see how many ponytails they can fit on suki’s head and how many little braid yue can do 

they travel EVERYWHERE 

since yue is royalty and suki is her body guard,,,, well i mean, they totally have to see these kingdoms they are doing trade deals with in person 

it helps that they're friends with a lot of them 

they stay over in everything from camping so they can stargaze to ritzy hotels with hot tubs in the bathroom 

yue gives suki rocks she finds on all their travels and suki lines them up on their mantle around the pictures of them in increasingly weird locations 

suki loves guarding yue’s meetings bc she gets to watch her absolutely rip a new one into misogynistic old men and it never fails to bring her joy 

While yue doesn’t love getting attacked, the ruthless efficiency suki defends her with is like,,,,,stupid attractive 

[castlevania-afterdark-imagines]

Halloween Headcanons

HAPPY HALLOWEEN FROM MOD ROSE AND MOD SOVIET! Thank you guys for continuing to read the blog! We hope to be releasing some of the character matchups soon, but for today please enjoy this quick post covering the crew's holiday activities! Assuming modern for this post, kids probably aren’t trick or treating at Drac’s castle. 

Trevor

Costume for this year: Zombie, easy to make and fun to overdo when you've got the time. 

Favorite candy of all time: Snickers, he actively buys the fun sized ones for himself instead of full size because he knows his lack of self control. 

Favorite autumn treat: Baked apples, with a pint of whatever fancy autumn ale the local brew pub is trying out this year. 

Trick-or-treat etiquette: Leaves the candy in a big bowl on the front porch, which he guards by blending in with his ridiculous amount of decorations and scaring the daylights out of anybody who tries to take more than needed. 

Sypha 

Costume for this year: Mad Scientist,  complete with fake green blood spattered  robe and pipe cleaners shaped into *electricity* coming out of her floofed out hair. 

Favorite candy of all time: She loves all the tart and fruity things, but if you forced her to pick one she'd say Nerds.

Favorite autumn treat: Pumpkin bread, homemade and covered in a maple brown sugar icing. She tried incorporating the seeds into some sort of crumble on top but nearly burned the kitchen down trying to toast them.

Trick-or-treat etiquette: Answers the door, gushing over the kids who dress up and closing the door on teens who show up without costumes. She also keeps a small stash of allergy sensitive alternatives in case a parent asks for it. 

Alucard 

Costume for this year: Werewolf who just changed back to a human again, or at least that’s what he calls it when he realizes he forgot to get his costume together and wears a torn up shirt and pants with a little makeup to make him look haggard. (Offer to add on a dog collar and cuffs to sell the costume and watch him be really fucking prepared for next year)

Favorite candy of all time: Redhots, or any other cinnamon candy. They were always super easy to trade for, in that most kids didn’t want them so he just got to take them all home for free.

Favorite autumn treat: Hot and fresh apple cider, with a splash of brandy if he’s feeling particularly chilly that night.

Trick-or-treat etiquette: He’s not a big fan of answering the door every 5 min, but he manages a smile and a few pieces per visitor. Lights go off as soon as the sun goes down though.

Dracula

Costume for this year: He just fucking hauls some old ass armor from his closet and goes as a warlord and has won every costume contest every year. Cheater.

Favorite candy of all time: Dark Chocolate pieces, not too sweet and also no kid is going to complain if he fishes all of them from the candy bowl.

Favorite autumn treat: Homemade toasted pumpkin seeds, they’re infinitely better than the basic store bought ones you find year round, and he adds a little bit of extra spice to them in the form of ghost pepper powder. He can handle it, and it keeps people from filching them.

Trick-or-treat etiquette: His is known as the house that only the bravest kids go to, for no particular reason. The decor is pretty standard, the handfuls of candy are GIGANTIC, but Vlad is more than aware of the tall tales kids spin for each other about the giant who lives there.

Lisa

Costume for this year: She tosses a doctor’s coat over a long body hugging black dress, dawns a black big and dark makeup, and goes at “Morticia-n” Adams. It doesn’t matter if no one gets it, she knows and is smug as hell about it.

Favorite candy of all time: Caramels, just by themselves but she won’t turn down a caramel apple if one happened across her path.

Favorite autumn treat: All the fun autumn coffee drinks, she needs that caffeine hit for long hours at the doctor’s office and hey, gotta spice it up now and then.

Trick-or-treat etiquette: Loves answering the door, hypes up the kids over their costumes and kneels down to their level to hand them their candy. She doesn’t give them a ton though, doctor’s guilt and all.

Hector

Costume for this year: Elf, very much inspired by Lord of the Rings styling. It fits in well at the vet clinic with all of the animals and keeps him looking normal enough to not spook them.

Favorite candy of all time: M&M’s, they’re simply and easy to just fill a bowl with and munch on throughout the week of Halloween. Plus no extra individual wrappers that he was to worry about Cezar trying to munch on.

Favorite autumn treat: Caramel corn, again a simple and sweet finger food. But this one he much prefers to get at a festival booth when it’s still hot and you have the smell of it cooking lingering in your nostrils.

Trick-or-treat etiquette: He’s not a huge fan of answering the door, but he’ll put on a brave face since he knows for many kids this is a big deal. If he notices any kid getting bullied or jeered at he unceremoniously dumps the entire bowl in their bag and tells them to head home early to avoid any more issues.

Isaac

Costume for this year: Grim Reaper. It’s literally a robe and a scythe, super easy and minimal effort, but just enough effort to avoid being called out for not trying harder.

Favorite candy of all time: Not really a candy person, it’s all high processed garbage to him. But he does have a soft spot for butterscotch and strawberry hard candies like his grandparents used to have around all the time.

Favorite autumn treat: Pecan pie, he’s not a huuuuuuge sweets person but a slice of pie with a dark roast coffee to offset the sugar and he is instantly in a good mood.

Trick-or-treat etiquette: Always conveniently ends up away from home that night, mostly so he doesn’t have to hear the doorbell constantly. He’ll leave some candy out to avoid getting his house egged but that’s about it.

Godbrand

Costume for this year: Pirate, then he can make all the booty jokes and drink all the alcohol he wants.

Favorite candy of all time: He likes the chewy things, like taffy or Twizzlers but will honestly eat anything. More specifically, he will eat EVERYTHING if you don’t hide the candy meant for the trick-or-treaters.

Favorite autumn treat: Cinnamon rolls, cake for breakfast? Fuck yeah. (Nobody tell him you can have them year round)

Trick-or-treat etiquette: Is of the mind a kid has to go through a fuckin gauntlet of spooky yard decor to earn their sugar rush. Yes he is going to jump out and scare them in the yard, yes he is going to get nearly punched by a few spooked fathers, but he always rewards the kids with a decent candy haul.

Carmilla

Costume for this year: Banshee, it’s dramatic, dark, and scares the sweet jesus out of men.

Favorite candy of all time: Godiva chocolates, she buys a whole fancy box for herself at the beginning of each month. And then pretends she doesn’t eat them all in the first two days.

Favorite autumn treat: Cranberry things, like bars or jams. People have tried to argue with her that it's more of a winter thing but fighting with her over other things has never worked either so...her opinion stands unchallenged now.

Trick-or-treat etiquette: She’s hosting a very lavish party at her house, to be honest she probably rarely hears the doorbell. When she does answer it she lets the kids grab a handful from the ONE bowl she keeps by the door and when that’s gone she just turns off the outside light and stops answering.

-Mod Soviet

[purpleyellow]

Mae’s relationship with The boyz

The boyz 12th member

Mae’s masterlist

a/n: happy new year everyone!! Feel free to share your thoughts with me. Requests are open! 🧡

Sangyeon 

They are a comforting presence for each other. Mae would trust her entire life to Sangyeon as he is someone she’s sure will never outright judge her or demand something she is not comfortable with. On the other hand, I can see him not worrying too much about her but being careful when her mood seems off, and asking what it was afterward so he’s sure she’s fine again. 

The girl usually laughs at his impersonations or weird jokes, which instantly put her into his goody list, and Sangyeon is very thankful for having someone that will hear his random rants without getting caught up in it. More often than not, you can see him standing on the sidelines, cheering for her when he’s aware she’s doing something she’s not very confident in.

Jacob

Becoming trainees at the same time might have been the best thing for them, seeing as they often struggled with the same stuff, and pushed the other through their rough times. Mae sometimes wonders where she would be if it weren’t for Jacob and his insane amount of patience. Also, their personality is very comparable and they’re both soft-spoken most of the time, deobis aren’t even surprised whenever they find out something else they have in common.

They made a habit of going to karaoke rooms before debuting as a way to both practice singing and his Korean but to also rest and have fun. After Kevin joined the company he went along as well and after they became rookies all of the members would occasionally join in on the trio.

Younghoon

Soft, just soft. Both together and for each other. When she’s around Younghoon, Mae actually becomes more clingy and he’s the only one she goes out of her way to show skinship with (back hugs are her favorite). He also gets easily entertained by her antics and likes to joke that he’s her bodyguard.

Vlive moments that usually lead to him making an unintentional innuendo and she gets embarrassed and leaves the room so she doesn’t have to explain what just happened. On that note, Mae doesn’t like helping with English that much because it usually leads the members to getting entertained by her accent, but she makes an exception to Younghoon

Hyunjae

His number one hobby is to make her embarrassed, and considering they, as well as Haknyeon, have been roommates for the longest time Hyunjae has a lot of material to share. He clings to her at every opportunity and is constantly nagging about the amount of clothes Mae has as well as the closet space they take.

Surprisingly or not, he often helps her with choreography and is overall a good listener. She’s also not that bothered by his antics and has grown comfortable enough to tell him to knock it off once she gets over them. Fans didn’t know they were as close until she answered “Hyunjae” when asked which of them she’d want as an actual brother. 

Juyeon

The “looks tough but is actually soft” duo. Over the years, he became her number one dance instructor seeing as he’s mostly calm and doesn’t really mind pulling extra hours to help her. We know how Juyeon usually babies Eric, and many fans think he’s like that to Mae as well, but on the contrary, he also prefers to be wary instead of butt in on her business. 

Having that said, when the girl shows even 1% discomfort or annoyance in general he’s the first one to step in and help her out. Mae usually feels weird that he acts like that but it usually comes in handy when the group is having a discussion and she needs someone to back her up and be on her side.

Kevin

Kevin has taken pride in being the main reason for her meme awakening. Before he arrived, Mae and Jacob were as close as friends could get, but as Kevin and the boy hit it off, Mae expected to be thrown into the sidelines. She couldn’t be more wrong, considering that he also made a lot of effort into keeping her close, thus beginning the “Kevin getting frustrated at Mae not getting his references” saga.

Lowkey, they just want to chill and listen to questionable music together. Highkey, he wants to get her to twerk with him (he’ll kiss the ground the day she does). Again, Mae is a good listener and often joins in on his random thoughts or simply goes along with whatever he’s doing.

New 

Random high note battles and both of them silently judging the others. Chanhee and Mae often fall into a cycle of complaining around but instead of tackling the matter with him she often does nothing, which makes him complain ten times harder. Objectively speaking, he’s the member who helps her the most with organizing her stuff and adulting in general.

The girl randomly drags him with her to the mall to people-watch or makes him do vlives with her just for the sake of it. For some reason, it took them a little while to find common ground but once they did, New became one of her go tos when it came to sharing struggles. On a random note, Mae thought his math tricks were an absolute scam and believed none of it until they were actually tested.  

Q 

Playfully bickering 24/7. They have many fake arguments, usually around her struggles with some choreographies and his lack of patience when it comes to teaching her. Two months after their debut he decided to let that job fall onto Juyeon and his life became a lot more fun. Around the release of Right Here he went back to randomly giving her tips but please don't leave them alone in a practice room.

When it comes to interests Changmin didn’t think they’d have many in common but after many movie nights, he was quick to find out Mae doesn’t really mind horror and thriller which made her perfect to watch them with him. She does, however, have a problem with the creepy-ass dolls and masks he buys and has sworn someday she will make a bonfire out of them.

Haknyeon 

99 babies and eternal roommates. They’re an interesting pair considering Juhaknyeon is more laid back and outgoing and Mae is - according to him -  more high maintenance. They did find common ground around the fact that they’re both foodies and 99s vlive mukbangs are a very constant thing.

Also, kind of random but he’s one of the members she would stand by without a second thought. Hak just tries his best to make any situation lively and the girl appreciates it a lot, especially when she’s having a tough time herself, so as gratitude she’s ready to fight anyone for him. 

Sunwoo 

The other person she would stand by without a problem. It doesn’t really help that Sunwoo acts like an absolute child whenever Mae is near and constantly clings to her like she’ll solve every trouble in the world (flash news, she won’t). The girl finds it kind of comical how he’s always giving her puppy eyes and just pushes his head out of the way for him to snap out of it.

Back to Younghoon when I said someone gets entertained by her accent, that is Sunwoo. He’s constantly repeating the way she says some words or asking her to help him say something, which he knows she doesn’t quite like but does it anyway. Also, not her go-to pastime, but random rap battles are always fun when they happen and they usually end up with one of them on the ground laughing. 

Eric

Aka the non-Canadian half of the English line. Also mildly entertained by her Aussie accent but doesn’t show it as often as Sunwoo. When they first met, Eric instantly decided they were going to be friends but once she figured it out it was too late and she couldn’t back down anymore (that’s what she says at least, deep down we know she enjoyed his company just as much).

Mae is the introverted friend to his outgoing self, she usually has to tell Eric to calm down because she grew tired of following him around or got very embarrassed by him randomly approaching a senior. Also worth mentioning he’s her number one hype person and has multiple times made her embarrassed by complimenting her in front of deobis or just random people. 

Former member: Hwall/Hyunjun

Fashion buddies. Mae has a habit of randomly dragging him to go shopping and they’ve got to the point of adding items into each other’s carts when they think the other might like it. They have a fun time just walking around and chatting as well, before debuting they’d often share what’s bothering them before getting ice cream to cheer up.

Due to different scheduling, it became harder to keep meeting up but Mae often does her best to sneak around into whatever he’s doing. Also, late-night phonecalls became more regular which led the members into believing she had a boyfriend before finding out it was just Mae catching up with him.

[dweetwise]

Can you do a continuation of pyramid head x dummy tick reader with killers and surviors that are flirting or make sexual movements to the reader?

i apologize to all dummy thicc reader fans for taking so long! i got two requests, so i’ll do survivors for this one and more killers for the next <3 warnings for some nsfw suggestive language!

Survivor Thirst (survivors X dummy thicc reader)

Following Pyramid Head’s warnings (and in some cases, a very big sword through the gut), the killers, thankfully, seemed to leave you alone, sticking to chasing and killing you normally.

Even the Entity appeared to notice your annoyance, not calling you into trials quite as often as usual. That left you with more time to hang out with your friends and sneak out to Midwich to see your boyfriend, and you couldn’t help but think of how nice it was to get a break from the crazy shenanigans and embarrassment of the last couple of weeks.

Unfortunately, you couldn’t have been more wrong.

It all started relatively innocently when Steve, after a trial, excitedly bounded over to you.

“Hey y/n, feel my shirt!” he said, a neverending smile on his face. You tilted your head in confusion, before reaching to grab the hem of his sailor costume shirt. It felt like normal fabric, a kind of cheap polyester, and you failed to see what the big deal was. Did he wash it or something? “It’s boyfriend material,” Steve finally quipped, smile morphing into a smirk at his own punchline. You rolled your eyes and playfully shoved the teen away, hiding a small grin of your own.

The other survivors watched the exchange with varying levels of amusement. You thought they were just laughing at the horrible pick-up-line, but it would later become apparent that they took it as an invitation to try to get into your pants.

“Are you close with your father?” Ash asked you out of the blue when you were sitting by the fire, stoking the logs with a stick. The question took you a little off guard; normally, the man was all jokes and extravagant tales of his youth, and you never would have guessed he’d actually be interested in your past. Before you managed to answer, you saw a grin spreading over his lips. “Because you look like you need a daddy,” Ash leered, gaze glued to your generous cleavage from where you were leaned over the other side of the fire.

If you’d been able to reach him over the flames, you’re pretty sure you would have slapped him. As it stood, the disgusted scoff you made was sure to get the point across.

But then, there was Yui.

“So, uhh...” the biker started uncharacteristically meekly, approaching you in a semi-secluded spot in the corner of camp. “I saw you with the Pig the other day...”

Oh, fuck. If Yui had seen the killer glued to your back and sensually stroking your face, she must have gotten the wrong idea.

“Yui, shit, um,” you sputtered nervously, causing Yui to glance at you with hope shining in her eyes. “I don’t swing that way.”

At least you think you don’t. You’d always thought Yui was really pretty, but in a completely no homo way. Like right then, you could objectively see that she’s quite attractive, her crop top and short shorts showing off her muscular build—

Yui managed a quick apology and an awkward laugh, and you cleared your throat and squeaked out an “It’s fine”. Your eyes, as of their own accord, were glued to her ass when she walked away.

Okay, maybe a little homo.

If only Nea had been as sensible as Yui.

“Y/n, over here!” Nea called, waving you over when you walked back into camp after a stroll to Midwich. “Did I ever tell you about my cat?“

“No, not that I remember,” you said, sitting down next to her on one of the logs. “I know you like cats, though.”

“Mm-hm,” Nea agreed, her innocent smile morphing into something much more mischievous. “I sure do love a good pussy,” she practically purred, eyeing you up and down.

“You little brat—” you hissed, jumping back up on your feet while your face flushed red.

“So that’s a no?” the tagger had the audacity to wink at you, and you moodily walked over to the other side of camp to avoid the temptation of smacking her in the face with her own purple flashlight.

It couldn’t even have been a full day before you caught Dwight sneaking glances at you. He blushed furiously every time you noticed, and eventually you just let out a small sigh and made your way over, eager to get this over with.

“Something on your mind, Dwight?” you asked with a friendly smile, trying to give him the benefit of the doubt and even sitting down a respectable distance away from him so he wouldn’t get the wrong idea.

After a minute of nervous sputtering and trying to ignore the question, Dwight finally managed to spill the beans. “Feng said you, um, wanted to... k-kiss me?” he squeaked. You sighed long and loud, causing Dwight to nearly have a nervous breakdown. You tried to reassure and reject him without too much of your annoyance shining through, all while thinking of creative ways to get back at Feng for another one of her dumb pranks.

A couple of days must have passed and, thankfully, no more embarrassing incidents occurred. You were just about starting to think the others had managed to get it out of their systems, as no more potential suitors were lining up to harass woo you.

And then you unsuspectingly leaned over a log to rummage through your stack of items to look for a med-kit, and...

“Nice arse, luv!” David hollered from the other side of the campsite. In an instant you were up on your feet, glaring daggers at the brawler who didn’t look the least bit sorry.

When David proceeded to throw in a wolf whistle for good measure, you hurled your med-kit across the camp, turning on your heel and stomping out into the woods. Judging by the dull ‘thunk’ of the item hitting wood and David’s roaring laughter, you’d missed your target—his head.

Eventually you came across Jake in the woods, sitting quietly by a cluster of trees and stocking some of his toolboxes.

You slumped down next to the saboteur with a huff, crossing your arms and trying to think of how to get revenge on David. Jake glanced over in acknowledgement, but didn’t say a word before getting back to his task.

You felt some of your anger dissipate in Jake’s calming presence, watching him work with methodical composure. Jake may have been be a little anti-social, but at least you could always count on him to never think with his dick—

“We should fuck,” Jake said and your mind screeched to a halt.

“I beg your pardon!?” you squawked, causing him to finally turn to look at you properly.

“I think you’re hot. Do you wanna fuck?” he said, the same infuriatingly calm expression on his face, acting like he didn’t just proposition you in the crudest way possible.

You furiously stomped back to the campfire, leaving Jake alone with his tools and an angry red handprint on his cheek.

Upon your return the others, thankfully, seemed to sense your mood and nobody dared to bring up the David incident, leaving you to sulk in a corner in peace.

And then, Ace got back from a trial.

You saw him swaggering over, an annoying cocky grin on his face. He opened his mouth and—

“DON’T,” you warned, lifting your finger to interrupt him while giving him your dirtiest glare. Ace raised his hands up in surrender while one of his eyebrows cocked up in question. “I’m sick of being perved on! You guys are the worst!” you complained, taking the opportunity to give David the stink eye from across camp.

“Actually, I was about to ask if you’d like to play a game of cards?” Ace inquired, genuine curiosity in his voice. “You’ve seemed on edge for a few days, looked like you could use a distraction.”

You blinked in confusion at the words. “Oh,” you weakly managed, a blush rising on your cheeks and feeling a little bit like an idiot. Seems like chivalry isn’t dead after all—

“So, strip poker?” Ace suggested, the sly grin back on his face.

“You FUCKING—” you yelled while Ace’s hearty laugh echoed across camp.

--------------------------------

“So if you happen to come by any moris, nobody will really mind,” you finish your story, looking up at Pyramid Head with a sickly sweet fake smile that fails to betray just how much you’d like to get petty revenge.

There’s an echoing chuckle from within the pyramid, and then a couple of inquisitive grunts while he draws a hook shape in the air.

“Camping and tunneling?” you ask, feigning ignorance. “I think those are just legitimate strategies.”

[spn-headcanons-daily]

Hello people of the crazy spn fandom, how are we doing? (not well)

Wanna read some headcanons?

Since the finale, which brought me a new flavour of disappointment, I started to create a list of made up facts/headcanons (don't know how to call it better) of what should in my opinion happen to characters instead. Points about Dean and Cas from this list are slowly turning into my first actual fanfic, but points about Sam and Eileen are more difficult to write into a short story, so for now they are just staying as facts in a list. And I decided to post them here.

Will anyone ever read it? - Probably not.

Will that logical fact stop me? - Definitely not.

I'm going to post these ideas in order, one in each post. They can't count as actual fanfics, but they are long

Side note: I do not accept 15×20 as canon. Nope. It doesn't exist. I chose to completely ignore it, and by now I successfully erased it from my memory. Except for the part that in a few years Sam has a son named Dean (actually not really, but I'm going to call him that for simpler understanding, if you read it you will later find out why). And also Miracle the dog stays, he is a good boy and deserves the best.

I also should mention that in my imaginary world they saved Cas. And I have an idea how, and I think it's a good idea, but that's for another time, 'cause for that part I'm actually writing a fic (and it's becoming longer and longer, I don't know how to stop, it's out of control, please send help)

So they all know now that Cas is alive and he is okay.

Also you should keep in mind that English is my second language which I didn't study properly like a normal person but instead learned purely by watching tv shows, so feel free to kick my ass for any mistakes, there's probably a lot here.

If you read this shit below and liked it at least a little bit, please live something in the notes to make me feel less lonely and useless. Thanks :з

So, too much words, huh? Here is the first headcanon idea:

SAM WRITES A BOOK

After their big victory brothers still hunt monsters, of course, but now, when they are finally not constantly forced to save the whole world, their days are far less busy. They even have free time. And Sam makes a decision to do something useful with it.

Sam pulls together all his previous research, goes through hundreds of books from the library, adds other sources, and he writes and publishes a book. A really long book. It takes him almost a year from the first idea to the completion of it. This book is sort of a database, a full encyclopedia of all supernatural things that the Winchesters and the other hunters they know encountered over the years, with an accurate description of how those things look, what they do, what they want, where you can find them. And, of course, how to stop them, kill them, or protect yourself from them. The content is quite impressive, Sam put all his time and soul into it, checking and double-checking all information, comparing sources and trying to grasp the essence of each part of the lore and put it on the pages as short and simple as possible.

The book is called "The hunter's manual". Eileen insisted on that title - both Sam and Dean (who didn't help that much but nevertheless felt invested) right until the publishing kept offering something different. Sam wanted a long and self-explanatory name for his beloved creation, Dean wished for something more "pretentious and catchy".

It was supposed to be just a wiki-style website at first, but halfway through work Sam got excited about creating an actual book, so through some acquaintances they found a publisher, who knew about monsters and other stuff after his encounter with some vampires and another hunter, and agreed to publish a book in exchange for a right to sell its copies.

Eileen fully supported the idea of the book, but after a few weeks she gets quite annoyed by the fact that sometimes she literally can't pull Sam away from the book writing process. Dean jokes that his brother got married to book before he married Eileen, which somehow leads to a long serious conversation about marriage and love and life in general. But actually Eileen understands the importance of Sam's book for him way more than Dean, who thinks about it only from the practical point of view.

Sometimes Eileen is also worried for Sam, because he spends too much personal resources on his project, and she is the one who reminds him when he forgets to eat in time or not sleeping enough, and makes him remember to take care of himself. Eventually she becomes quite invested in the process, and she helps Sam with a lot of research and gaining information from other hunters across the country. She gets an honourable mention in the book's authors' information page, under a fake name, of course, but it still counts for them.

In a few years Sam's book becomes a handbook for almost every hunter in the US, and it even gets translated into a few other languages, because turns out it considerably eases your life to have one source for all basic material for the hunts, instead of going through the whole libraries of controversial information.

A few people got their book signed by Sam and Dean: the Winchesters at this point became sort of legendary figures in hunters' world. Dean complains that this is not the way he planned to become famous. Sam objects that his brother has no right to sign the book and therefore shouldn't be complaining when he lets him be part of his fame.

The hunters now often give a link to a digital version of the book to all ordinary people who had to face something supernatural and now know that it's all real - because if they are already aware of the nightmares of this world, this book's instructions will help them to be safer in the future. This digital version is also heavily redacted, to contain only information for protection: no summoning rituals, for example, as well as no any other things and information that could potentially hurt anybody. This version was created after some dumb teenagers, who encountered a ghost before, got their hands on an unedited book and decided that summoning a demon could be a good idea for a party entertainment. It definitely wasn't.

Ironically, some time later this book accidentally becomes fairly popular among the general public, as a book in the fantasy genre, and now passionate fans of the "supernatural" books in the long internet discussions are accusing mysterious author of "The hunter's manual" of ripping off their favourite series. Sam finds it amusing and sometimes when he is bored anonymously goes into some forums to argue with fans.

[fandomfindings]

Inside Joke

Pairing: (Damien Haas x Reader)

Word Count: 1.5K

Warning(s): Implied Smut and Swearing 

**

You were completely and utterly embarrassed. One of your best friends, Shayne Topp, had just woken you up from a dream, an explicit dream to put it mildly.

You knew what the dream was about and from the look on Shayne's face when he woke you up, so did he. He tried his best to hold in his amusement but Shayne being Shayne it did not work in his favor.

"Oh, Damien!" Shayne cried out jokingly as you two left the room you were napping in. You began to beat him lightly, causing him to run all the way to set in laughter. By the time you two got there, he was red in the face with tears streaming down his cheeks.

You were prepared to continue to chase Shayne past your friends, but a pair of arms stopped you in your tracks.

"Woah woah woah. What's going on?" asked a familiar voice. You looked up to see it was Damien, the man you had a dream about and your boyfriend. 

"Shayne is making fun of me," You complained, getting closer to Damien's side embrace as you glared at Shayne. He was doubled over in laughter, and since he was facing you and Damien, every time he saw your face, he would laugh just a bit more.

"Why is he making fun of you?" Damien questioned, looking to you and then his best friend that stood across the room.

 At Damien's question, you tensed up a bit. You were too embarrassed to tell him what happened, especially right now in front of all your friends. 

Damien felt you tense in his arms, so he looked back to you in confusion. You began to grow hot. You weren't sure if it was from the run or the embarrassment of the situation. 

You hesitated to answer, and everyone noticed, including Shayne. Your hesitation made him laugh even harder. After a while, you finally said, "It's nothing, nevermind," trying to dismiss the conversation so the humiliation would end.

Damien once again looked confused but let it be. He brought you into an actual hug this time to properly comfort you.

The incident never came up again, that is until three months later during a try not to laugh challenge.

"Welcome back everyone to another laugh challenge," Courtney started the video excitedly. All of you involved in the video shouted and waved to the camera frantically.

"Today we are joined by Y/N, who you all have seen before but haven't in a good while," Courtney continued as you sent a wave to the camera and said, "Hi guys."

"You all know the rules, and if you don't, it's easy to understand. Let's hop right into it," Courtney finished, effectively ending the intro.

The video was going by smoothly. So far Damien, Shayne, Keith, and Olivia, had gone and you had made all but Keith laugh successfully. Yourself, Noah, and Courtney were left to go, and it was now your turn.

 Everyone took turns trying to make you laugh, and the only two to succeed so far were Noah and Damien. Olivia had just tried her hand at making you laugh with assistance from Shayne, but it did not work. Olivia went back behind the partition while Shayne stayed in front with you for a second.

"I have never made Y/N laugh during one of these, so it is my new goal in life to make that happen," Shayne commented, looking between you and the camera as he spoke.

"Bring it on Topp," You said playfully before taking a swig of water into your mouth.

Shayne was the last person to try and get you to laugh, and you were admittedly nervous. You knew Shayne, and you knew he has been dying to try and make you laugh during one of these challenges. You also knew once Shayne set his mind to doing something, he would stop at almost nothing to do it.

Producer Garrett gave Shayne the go-ahead, and you knew the timer had started, you only had to hold out for 30 seconds. 

Shayne came from behind the partition and in front of you. He laid a pillow on the floor to the side of you and proceeded to place his head upon it. He curled up and pretended to cuddle deeper into said pillow.

Shayne slept in silence which confused you, causing your eyebrows to furrow slightly. He would surely lose if he didn't do something soon.

The peaceful smile Shayne started the bit with soon morphed into one of frustration but also...lust?

Shayne shifted from the curled up position on his side to an arched back position and then shouted, "Oh, Damien!" 

You immediately spit out your water, successfully producing a seemingly perfect spit take. Shayne quickly got up from the floor and wiped the water that got on him off, all the while laughing to his heart's content.

He clutched for his chest as you began to choke from the little water that remained in your mouth, going down your throat unexpectedly.

As you tried to regain yourself, you could only hear the laughter of others around you, mostly Shayne to your dismay. Once put back together you looked to Shayne with a glare. His face was beet red, and a vein was ready to pop on his forehead.

You hopped from the stool and began to beat your friend facetiously.  You knew the fans would get a kick out of the exchange and question Shayne's joke. 

As you hit Shayne with your fist lightly, he continued to laugh. He took the beating knowing you were merely joking, and giving him what he deserved. 

After the laughter and your hits to your friend died down Shayne spoke up still clutching his chest.

"I'm- I'm sorry. I had - I had to do it," He spoke, needing to pause now and then to take a breath or laugh.

"I hate you so much," You said, crossing your arms like a child might when frustrated.

"I'm sorry!" Shayne exclaimed, bring you into a firm hug as you fake pouted. He continued to laugh during the embrace nonetheless.

"Fanfiction writers have at it," one of your friends commented from behind the partition causing the laughter to be revived.

After just about everyone, including yourself, made Noah and Courtney laugh you all started the outro.

"Thank you all so much for watching, and thank you Y/N for joining us! You did a great job," Olivia commented, bringing you into a side hug.

"Except for when Shayne made you choke," Noah remarked jokingly.

"To be fair, it was a bit of a low blow. It is an inside joke of ours," Shayne explained.

Before anyone could question the context of the inside joke, you spoke up." It's all good. Thank you guys, for having me."

"Where can the lovely people find you?"Damien asked for the audience in case they wanted to follow you.

"You all can stalk me at Y/U/N on all my social media," You said, waving your hand under your username that would be added in post. 

"Don't forget to like, subscribe, and aggressively hit that notification bell," said Keith.

"Bye!" You shouted waving towards the camera, causing everyone else to follow your lead.

"And cut!" someone said from behind the cameras and other equipment. Everyone gave a quick cheer or clap for a successful shoot.

 After giving your mics over to the sound department you and Damien headed for the exit. You two were off to have a quick lunch before you had to return to edit and Damien to film.

When you two were about to leave, Shayne stopped you.

"Hey, are we cool?" Shayne asked, making sure he didn't cross a line during the challenge.

"No harm done," You said honestly to your close friend.

"Good, I was worried I- " Shayne began in relief, but you cut him off.

"It does suck that you had to stoop as low as an inside joke to make me laugh though," You said jokingly to the dirty blond.

"Is that a challenge?" Shayne asked with squinted and determined eyes.

"You bet your ass it is."

"Challenge accepted," Shayne stated as he stuck his hand out for you to shake, which you did. You both shared a quick hug before he left to go his own way.

"So what exactly is this inside joke?" Damien questioned. He had grown curious the minute Shayne yelled the phrase, and he was finally able to ask you about it.

"It's called an inside joke for a reason baby," You said, taking Damien's hand into your own and walking off set.

*Bonus*

"Hey sweets get a look at this," Damien said, coming into your shared bedroom where you read silently. 

Damien came over to show you his laptop, which displayed many comments. You realized the try not to laugh challenge was finally posted and as you predicted the fans were going nuts. 

Comments like: " I must know the meaning behind the inside joke." , "You smut writers ready?", and "My favorite part was Shayne's joke to Y/N," flooded the comments.

You ran a hand down your face in mock distress. Damien giggled at your behavior, knowing you were only joking.

 "I knew this would happen."

"You ready to tell me about this joke?" Damien questioned, closing his laptop and placing a balled fist under his chin.

"Not in a million years," You commented, placing a quick peck to Damien's lips and returning to your book. 

**

A/N: Thank you all so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I have been a fan of Smosh since 2013, and I am so happy to write a piece involving just a small part of who they are. To celebrate the end of Summer Games, I wrote a quick fic about our precious Damien. Feel free to let me know what you guys think!

Lots of Love <3 

[stella-monstrum]

Bobby Roe’s ‘Underestimated Gem’, “The Houses October Built”; [1hr 31mins, Rated R] (2014)

Admittedly, there is a lot to unpack in this review. 

I found myself at the relatable point of endless scrolling through horror films on streaming apps, hoping to find something that really challenged and rattled my thinking afterwards. Obviously, film taste is different for everyone, and I am CERTAINLY way too easy to scare. But this wasn’t a film made to elicit jumps—or screams for that matter.

I went into this viewing with a couple expectations. First of all, Hulu’s trailer for the movie was enough to grab my interest by itself. The clips of this group of friends exploring haunted horror attractions and the brief introduction to the eerie actors along with it pulled me in.

[Anecdote; Around the same time that the film came out, I’d gone to my first haunted house. I was separated from my group, and thrown into a “butcher shed,” and proceeded to have the living shit scared out of me. One of the actors knew that their mates had gone too far and pretty much came in to save the day. Afterwards, I thought it was the coolest thing and started to laugh at my own fear—which plays massively to the appeal to watch.]

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Before I go into the review... 

I will say that the thriller theme to this film made me squirm and made it difficult to watch all the way through. So if you’re squeamish, have trauma-like responses, or have epilepsy, proceed with caution or skip this one altogether. 

This film also contains a bunch of NSFW themes, torture, and graphic images (which basically delivers its main purpose, I guess).

(Written by Stella. Edited by Jacob J )

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The Cast:

Brandy Schaeffer as Brandy

Zach Andrews as Zach

Bobby Roe as Bobby

Mikey Roe as Michael (aka Mikey)

Jeff Larson as Jeff

The casting is fairly straightforward, with the actors playing overly exaggerated versions of themselves. Though technically under the lead of director Bobby Roe, the cast all had a hand in writing the film. Pulling double duty is a feat in itself. (It was unfortunate to find in my research that, after the 2017 sequel, the majority of the cast just dropped off the face of the Earth.)

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Summary:

The five childhood friends from Ohio seek out the thrill of the Halloween season, traveling through the deep south of Texas in an RV. They’re stocked up on junk food, booze, drugs, and pure joy that they’re setting out on this journey. For the six days leading up to Halloween, they visit six attractions in the Lone Star state. (technically) 

The team begins at a bar in Tyler, Texas, to celebrate the beginning of their trip. In their wasted stupor (and even while sober throughout the film), they make light and joke about how these “haunted attractions” are tame and as fake as the horror films they strive to represent. (Meta as hell, right?)

With each visit, the attractions grow scarier and freakier. Somehow, they piss off a whole gang of creepy-ass characters. Despite being essentially in the middle of nowhere, the aforementioned creep squad (we’re talking clowns, bloody bunnies, backwoods Vorhees groupies, etc.) stalk and terrorize the traveling quintet. The group moves on toward the ultimate attraction, The Blue Skeleton, which they desperately try to find. This leads them on a mystery hunt through word of mouth (and an online horror attraction forum, to the secret location). They eventually wind up heading towards the deep, dark heart of Louisiana, where The Blue Skeleton exceeds every fear that they wanted in the first place—and ends up being their worst nightmare.

The film also gives a small nod to George Romero, the man who changed the way that zombies were seen in pop culture and films, during their visit to a zombie-themed paintball attraction. On top of that, the creators made the film on a very small budget (allegedly). It was given a brief theatrical release in 2014, but years later became a niche gem with a continuing following amongst horror film fans.

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[Likes & Dislikes]

It was incredibly hard to want to complain, consider how the film left my state of mind after watching. But, ultimately, I had to find something for the sake of this review. So I’ll start with the dislikes first, because it’s so worth saving the best for last in this circumstance.

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[Dislikes]:

1.) The first-person filming: Although capturing themes and moments perfectly to keep suspense, it made me super queasy.

- Now, this nitpick isn’t an end-all film-ruiner. With any first person/found-footage deal, there’s a guarantee to feel the rollercoaster like adventure in your gut. (I recommend having a good bowl of ramen or some ginger tea on hand.)

- The filming style 100% captures and cranks every moment of fear, suspense, and terror. It makes you feel like you’re a part of the team. (Found-footage/first-person filming was the original VR, fight me.)

2.) The full on disrespect that the group shows to the attractions.

First attraction: They find a ladder (that’s conveniently left unsupervised, despite not being for patron use). Mikey decides to climb it and steals a megaphone as well. He causes a scene atop the ticket booth and attempts to get a crowd shot for their film at the Haunt House in Caddo Mills, Texas. This pisses off an entire group of creepy-ass clowns that follow them back to their RV. Living up to his unspoken title of Mister Dumbass, Mikey tries to confront them.

● Second attraction: One of the clowns and a broken porcelain doll actress proceeded to follow the crew to this location in Eureka, Texas. Mikey confronts the “doll” when they find her on the side of the road. She follows onto the bus, screams, then slowly leaves.

● Third Attraction: As the group enters Phobia, located by US Highway 248, they’re told not to film past the point of entry. The camera shuts off. When the camera (one that Bobby set up on the RV) comes back on, we see Mikey trying to hook up with one of the contortionist girls. Afterward, when Zach finds out more information about the acclaimed Blue Skeleton, they get confronted by yet another pissed off clown accusing Mikey of filming when they were told not to.

There’s an entire slew of other incidents that I won’t dive into, but I will say one final con:

3.) Brandy just minds her own business the whole time, yet gets the backlash and crossfire from the boys’ shenanigans and dumbassery. 

- Honestly the more she got caught in the middle, the more I felt looming dread. 

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[Likes/Loves:]

Amidst the (albeit small) annoyances, there was so much that I loved and enjoyed about this film. 

1.) Complete out-of-the-gate blurred lines of the entertainment-yet-fear that we seek out in haunted houses.

● Starting from the opening scenes, there’s VHS like footage of fun and upbeat tours from haunted attractions, which evolves into a slow burn of much much darker and horrible secrets/tragedies from them: 

- An employee found hung, mistaken as a prop;

- Houses allegedly hiring murderers and criminals without background checks; 

- & Actors going as far as breaking bones (but not killing) to scare patrons.

2.) Continuity that never strayed from the film’s theme and/or purpose. 

● Through all six attractions that the crew visit, the actors that they seemingly managed to piss off (looking at the real male hubris issues here) follow and stalk them whilst traveling in the middle of nowhere—even all the way to Louisiana.

● With each haunt, the scare level increases, starting with fun and simple baby-type scares and progressing to pure anxiety and nightmare fuel. 

(As an aside, I’m honestly still mad that there was no seizure warning for the amount of strobe lights they filmed in the name of fear.)

3.) Consistent foreshadowing

● At the very beginning, they show a gut-wrenching video of a bloodied and tied-up Brandy being shoved into a trunk

● Also, the film seemingly always lingers on Brandy, which gives a small clue as to the haunt creeps having an unhealthy obsession with her.

● At the first attraction, The Haunt House, while the crew films with high spirits, they convince Brandy to playfully get into one of the prop coffins, thinking it’ll be funny. Then the actor nearby shuts the coffin until she screams to let her out. 

      - Deeper into their travels, they joke about how much they’d want to get paid to be buried alive. At the end, that’s exactly what happens.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

(Final Thoughts)

There are so many heart- and gut-wrenching moments that force you to never look away from the screen. If I’m being honest, the style and story that Bobby Roe created is honestly on par with something you’d see from the acclaimed likes of Kubric and Zombie, among others.

 This is such an underrated find. Minus my nitpicks, I’m giving this [9/10] stabs.

 (This is the most I’ve been shaken up by a film in a good while.)

Want to get lost and vicariously (not literally) shit your pants? This is the film for you. 

[Just don’t piss any clowns off on your way there,K?]

[imaginesmai]

Tom Holland-The Impossible (1)

Plot: Your relationship with Tom is on edge. Work, paparazzi and not seeing each other for months is making you tear apart from each other. Thankfully, he’s an amazing boyfriend and propose you what you thought it would be the perfect holidays; Thailandia. The hot sun, the beach, a cute hut and privacy to mend your relationship. Neither of you thought you would be witnesses of one of the greatest natural dissasters of history

Warnings: right now, none. This part only has fluff, but there will be!

The sight in front of you was… indescribable. Tall and green trees stood proud in the middle of that village, where children ran from one side to another laughing and pushing each other. All type of people were there; from elders who were talking between themselves to pregnant women, from natives to tourists like you and Tom.

Birds sang as you looked up to the new country that would be your home for two weeks, a happy smile on your face. You closed your eyes and enjoyed the sun kissing your skin, so different from the cloudy weather back in London.

A feather touch in your hand made you open them again, and you saw Tom beside you brushing his fingers with you. You let out a happy giggle and showed him a full-teeth smile.

“I take that you’re happy” he teased, brown eyes warming your whole body. There was something about him that had you always smiling, even in your worst times. 

“You can’t even imagine how much” you sighed, pecking his cheek quickly. “Thank you so much for this, Tommy, I-“

“Hey, stop with the thanks, alright?” he cut you off. “I’ve already told you. We both needed a vacation.”

For the last month, your relationship with Tom, the man you thought you were going to marry, had been hard. He was away filming and you were busy with your own job, barely seeing each other once a month. And you had noticed that you didn’t kiss good night, made time for each other or something as simple as eat together. Instead of boiling it up until you exploded, you decided to talk with Tom about it. He promised to make it better, and the next day you found two tickets to Thailand; a two weeks holidays much needed just for the two of you.

No castmates, no family, no friends. Just you, Tom and the beach.

“Mrs and Mr Holland?”

You turned to see a short man with glasses looking at you with a kind smile, dressing the yellow overall typical of the hotel’s staff you had seen on the internet. Tom coughed to cover up a laugh, knowing how you hated to have your surname changed. If you did ever get married, he knew there wouldn’t be any legal way of making you take his.

“Actually, it’s-“

“Yep, that us” Tom said, still smiling. He took your hand in his and gave you a soft squeeze.

The man told you he was in charge of showing you around the village and your way to the hotel. As you walked, he started talking about the traditions. How, the night before Christmas, they threw a big flighting lights and let them disappear in the sky; a way of getting rid of everything bad that had happened that year. Tom moved his arm and wrapped it around your shoulders, bringing you closer.

He was the kind of man who didn’t have to use cologne to smell good. Even when he came from training or playing with his brothers, you always admired how well he smelled. Your arm made its way around his waist, and you pinched his stomach softly. It made him squeal away, emitting a strange noise that had the man looking at him with wide eyes.

After assuring him that he hadn’t been ‘punctured’ with anything, the man explained you the different risks of the plants and animals of that country. They were more dangerous, and the government couldn’t assure the proper treatment if you got infected by a venomous plant; although he assured you they would do everything they could.

“I can’t wait to see the beach” you whispered to Tom, a few feet away from the man. He looked ahead and then lowered his head to your ear.

“And I can’t wait to see you in the black bikini I saw you packing” he whispered, and you smacked his chest, chuckling. “What? Or without it, I can’t decide what is better.”

“You’re a perv” you teased, knowing that you would probably end up testing every surface on your hotel room. “We are here to enjoy the beach, the people and the customs. Not to satisfy your endless sexual drive”

“That hurt, love” he faked indignation. “Even more when I know that your ‘sexual drive’ is as big as mine.”

“You’re a weirdo, Holland”

“That’s why you love me, Y/N”

He tilted his head to kiss you, and you closed your eyes for a second. Enjoying the soft breeze that moved your hair, the sound of the leaves moving and the sun shining above you. You teared apart when the man cleared his throat, having stopped a few steps ahead. And you let your mouth fall open.

If you thought that the village and the nature were amazing, you were wrong; the hotel was the most amazing thing you had ever seen. Cute huts were distributed in an uncoordinated pattern around a beach bar and a pool. From where you were standing, you could see the blue and calm sea where some kids were playing with their families, and you could hear the waves hitting the shore. Tom said something to the guide and the man said his goodbyes, wishing you a good time and leaving. Your boyfriend looked down at your stunned face and laughed softly.

“I wish I had brought my phone” he complained, his eyes bright. “I could have you as my lockscreen for the rest of my life.”

“This-This is amazing, Tom” you let out an incredulous laugh. “How did you find this place?”

“Chris told me about it. Elsa and him like to spend their holidays here, with the kids and family” he explained. “It’s a good chance to, uh, you know, get away from the media. And press. To, um…”

“Make things right” you helped him, not wanting to say that the trip was a way of mending your relationship. Because you were sure it wasn’t broken yet. “I can’t wait to see our room.”

“House, actually” he smirked. “Each house is for one family, or tourist that come here.”

“Oh, couldn’t you have booked two then?” you joked, pouting. “I don’t want to be next to your hot ass all the time.”

“Such a shame that it only has a bed, Mrs Holland”

“Shut up”

Tom started walking to your hut, where your suitcases would be waiting for you, giving you a perfect view of his ass. You whistled at him and he blew you a joking kiss, shaking it for you. Running until catching up with him, you linked arms and pressed your cheek on his shoulder.

What a holidays

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The two first days passed too quickly for your liking. After the long flight, all Tom and you wanted to do was relax, so you spent the whole morning in the beach. The water was crystalline, and you could see the little fish that swam there. The rest of the day had been uneventful; making love, naps, making love again, going to the beach, almost having public sex, and having dinner. And, at night, making love. For the second day, you decided to go the village; met some people, learn about them and tried different foods, although Tom wasn’t a big fan of the spicy one.

It had been perfect, but your favourite moment without a doubt was the Christmas night. To avoid being distracted by phones, you and Tom had agreed of only bringing one, old enough to not have social media; only to call families and for emergencies. You had called your families and were in the beach, lighting up your flying candle, when you looked up.

Tom’s face was slightly tanned because of the sun, small freckles in both of his cheeks. He had his jaw clenched, focusing of not burning the whole thing down. In his brown eyes the small flame was reflected, which only made his face more perfect.

You smiled when your eyes landed on the necklace that one of children had made for him. Colourful shells with two feathers decorated it, and Tom had refused to take it off. Thinking about him with his own children made your heart swell with love.

“Well?” he asked, and you noticed he was looking at you, smirking. “Have you drooled enough or do I have to do anything by myself?”

“I thought Spiderman could light a candle without any help” you laughed, getting up from the sand.

“And miss a chance to do this?” Tom was by your side and pushed you closer to him, your arms locking behind his neck. “Not even Spiderman can resist that, love.”

You laughed and pressed your lips against him, Tom smiling in between. Laughs and happy screams surrounded you and, as you kissed the love your life, sand covering your bare feet, you found yourself happy again.

When you teared apart, Tom started leaving kisses all over your face. On your cheeks, nose, forehead, chin. You tried to push him away between friendly kicks, what only made him try harder.

“Tom! The light!” you finally pushed him off you, and he was back at trying to light the lamp, a small scoff on his face.

Walking in front of him, you took the stick with the flame and lowered it down, Tom watching you with his head on your shoulder. A yellow light surrounded you, creating a warm and comfortable moment. It remined you to those nights where you would stay over the Holland’s house, in front of the fire and playing board games with the family. The endless discussions between Paddy and Harry, Sam trying to cheat and Nikki not understanding why she was losing. It was your first Christmas away from home, and you missed them the most.

But then, you looked back and found yourself trapped in Tom’s arms, his nose brushing your cheek and eye lashes creating shadows on his cheeks.

You had met him five years ago, when he had thrown a coffee at you. It wasn’t like a romantic movie; it was hot coffee and your skin was awfully sensitive, so you got a serious burn on the middle on your chest. You had thrown every insult you knew at him on the way to the hospital, where he had offered to take you. And, two hours of waiting later and thirty minutes of treatment, you found the same boy who had thrown you the coffee with a guilty, nearly teary, look on his face and a new cup on his hand.

Best friends to lovers, that was your story. You giggled while remembering it.

“I love you” you blurted out, hugging him tight and pressing your ear against his chest, listening how it sped up at your words. It was not the first time you told him, but Tom’s reaction was always the same. “So much, Tom. I love you a lot, and I want to be always by your side.”

“Wow, those are major words” he joked. “Are you sure? Even with my huge sexual drive?”

“With everything you have” you rolled your eyes, and sneaked your hands until they touched his butt. “Especially this awesome ass you have, Mr Holland.”

“I’m glad to know I’m just a fucktoy for you?” Tom smacked your head softly. “Weirdo”

“Slut”

“Brat”

“Asshole”

“Gorgeous” he chuckled, knowing that neither of you meant those words.

“Love you Tommy” you closed your eyes, the warmth of the many lights hitting your face and making you go sleepy. “Thank you for this.”

“Love you more, Y/N. You deserve this and more”

In Tom’s eyes, you deserved everything. You had put up with his work since nearly the beginning, didn’t mind his family sticking around always and loved every imperfection he hated. That night, you watched the lights disappear in the sky as you hug each other, whispering sweet words or stupid compliments to each other, as if you were drunk of love.

You convinced Tom to carry you to your room, giving you a piggy back ride, and you almost fell asleep on his shoulder. When he laid you down, he pecked your lips and made its way down your neck, already planning in which way he could surprise you the next day. Because for him, you deserved everything.

Everything expect what was to come.

Tags:

@cutiepiemimi13

@van-horn-dashner

Want to know more about me? Here is my Masterlist! Feedback is always appreciated!!

[ubernoxa]

The Sip: A GNR Modern Name AU

Chapter 7: An Award Show Interview

Previous Chapters: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6)

Taglist: @str4nge-haze

Chapter Summary: Alanah still has doubts that Duff likes her. Sandy is getting annoyed with how stupid Alanah is.

“What do you mean it only takes you a couple of minutes to get ready?” I stared at Duff in bewilderment as I continued to get ready. I had already finished my hair, and was currently attempting to do my eyeshadow,

My stomach performed backflips as his laughter filled my bathroom. I smiled as I looked at my phone. I wished we weren’t FaceTiming. I wished I was sitting on his couch next to him giggling at his stupid jokes.

It had been two weeks since he came over to the apartment and helped me cook for my livestream. The first week was filled with hopeful texts of hanging out that were quickly canceled because Axl had scheduled time for them to work on some band related stuff. The second week was mainly filled with text and late night calls with no attempt at meeting up.

I didn’t ever ask him to elaborate because he seemed rather...frustrated by it. After the second time he canceled our hangout time (or as Sandy teased, our date), he left me a couple of voicemails that consisted of him drunkly telling me about how his day was or some crazy shit him and Izzy got into. There was always an apology though, he always apologized for canceling our plans.

“I just take a quick shower and then throw on some clothing,” He casually replied. How could this not be a big deal to him.

“Hey Alanah, do you have a sec to zip up my dress?” I froze when I heard Sandy call from the other room.

“One sec, I’ll be back in a moment or two,” I said to Duff as I went to Sandy’s bedroom.

Sandy had been freaking out for the past month about this event, and the fact that it was actually happening didn’t feel real. A few months back YouTube had asked us to perform some red carpet interviews at the AMAs, and we quickly agreed. A little while later Mark, my ex boyfriend (which still feels weird to say), informed me that he was the reason we received the opportunity.

Was it because Sandy and I were borderline influencers? Nope.

Was it all our hard work, late nights, and taking multiple jobs to get the YouTube channel to where it is now? Nope.

According to him, it was because his manager was having sex with some high up at YouTube manager, and was able to pull some strings to get us the opportunity.

I never found out the real answer to if we got it because of him or not, and part of me doesn’t want to know it.

“You okay?” I turned to Sandy as she spoke.

“Yeah why? This is a huge huge opportunity for us!” I faked a smile as if I had Vaseline on my teeth.

“God, you’re a terrible actress,” I could feel Sandy’s eyes on me as I tried to avoid her gaze.

“You’re thinking about Mark?” I continued to avoid looking at her not wanting to tell her she was right.

She leaned in close and whispered, “you are so much better off without him. You two were barely even dating for crying out loud. Thanks for zipping up my dress and say goodbye to your tipsy future boyfriend. We have an awards show to get to.”

I felt a smile cross my face as I walked back to the bathroom to say goodbye before heading out.

“Hey stranger,” I giggled as I spoke into my phone hoping to pull his attention from talking to Slash who also sounded tipsy.

“Hey, what does your dress look like so I can easily find you at the after party?” My cheeks felt like fire as he spoke.

“Umm I’m not invited to the after party,” my heart was racing from embarrassment as I admitted to him I wasn’t invited. He was a rockstar and I was practically no one.

“Wanna come as my plus one?” My heart skipped a beat. We were finally going to hang out in person again.

To say he caught me off guard was an understatement. I was screaming at myself to say yes, but words couldn’t come out.

“Or...” before he could continue talking I interrupted him saying, “yeah, yes, of course! I’d love to.”

My heart melted as a smile crossed his face.

FRIENDS.

He just wants to hang out. If it was he would have called it that. Friends, remember? There is a difference between being called a plus one and a girlfriend or date for the night. Plus I don’t have any feelings for him, not a single ounce. We were just friends, plus I just had a messy breakup. I should for I on my work right now.

I heard him shush someone who was in the room with him which only made me giggle. It was cute. It was cute, not him, it.

“So that dress? What does it look like, so I can find you?” He asked again, his smile never leaving her face. He was excited which only made my stomach, once again, perform backflips.

“I’ll give you three hints, okay? It’s sparkly, long and tight,” I grinned as he I watched him jokingly put on a thinking face.

“I like the choice. Can’t wait to see you in it,” he wasn’t helping the whole friends thing with comments like that, but he was a rockstar. Aren’t all rockstars just flirty? He probably had some groupie or supermodel he was spending time with as well.

————

“Who are you looking forward to performing tonight?”

Sandy and I stood at the red carpet for the non A list celebrities interviewing an up and coming indie artist. She was sweet, and it was a lot of fun interviewing her. I was defiantly going to buy her album when I got home.

“I would have to say I’m excited to see Motley Crue perform tonight...I can’t explain it, but something about bag boys,” my interviewee giggled as Sandy sent me a teasing look.

“Yeah, we get what you mean,” Sandy then smirked while looking at the camera.

Jesus Christ, I swore that she shipped Duff and I harder than our fans after the Duff’s and my cooking video.

“Good luck tonight,” I smiled as she left heading off to get her picture taken.

“So I take it you have been reading the comments on some of our videos?” I watched as a smirk formed on her face.

“We are just friends,” I whispered back as we waited for our next interviewee.

“Honey, are you in Egypt right now?”

I turned towards Sandy in confusion as she spoke. What was she getting on about?

“Because you’re in De-Nile! Get it because denial sounds like the Nile River,” Sandy laughed as if she thought it was the funniest joke in the world. I couldn’t help but roll my eyes.

“If Duff has said that you would have laughed,” she teased as she playfully pushed me.

“Speak of the Devil...” I looked over to see Duff and Slash at the fork in the carpet traffic. From what I gathered there were two paths. The first path was the one that the A list celebrities would take like Motley Crue, Beyoncé, Ed Shereen or even the Kardashians would walk down. Anybody who was anybody went down that path. We were standing on the second path where the minor internet stars, influencers, and smaller artists were sent.

I smiled as Duff sent me a small wave and weaved through the pack of people despite people clearly telling them to go down the other path. He looked excited to see me which didn’t help the nerves that filled me.

He looked hot. Did rockstars not need to wear a shirt under their jackets? Was that a thing?

FRIENDS, Alanah, FRIENDS.

Oh God I was staring, was it okay to stare? Were people noticing I was staring?

“Hey, ‘Lanah,” Duff smirked as he wrapped his arm around my waist.

FRIENDS

F R I E N D S.

He is just being flirty because he is tipsy.

“Hey Duff, hey Slash how’s it going,” Sandy cut in as I slowly began to panic on the inside. She could read me like a book.

“Can’t fucking complain, how about you?” Slash responded. I could barely focus as I felt Duff’s eyes undressing me as Sandy continued to interview Slash.

I wasn’t thinking when I touched his ass. I don’t know why I did it, I just did it. I looked up at Duff, worried to see a confused look on his face. I felt a smirk grow on my face as I saw Duff’s reaction. He liked it.

I was pulled from my thoughts as I felt Sandy lightly bump into me, prompting me to actually participate in the interview.

“Congrats on being nominated for two awards, favorite heavy metal artists and best heavy metal video. What do you think of your competition?” I asked earning a smile from Sandy who was growing tired of interviewing a drunk Slash who was borderline rambling. He was still a sweetheart thought.

“Well, if Axl was here he would say something cockily and condescending like...we don’t have competition. We’re in a league of our own, or we don’t pay attention to our competition,” Duff said with Slash joining him in laughter.

I sent Sandy a quick glance before Duff continued talking, “All joking aside, we are here for music, not the awards. We do what we do because we love what we do.”

“The nominations and awards are nice though,” Slash added before a security guy came by.

“Look like we’re getting kicked out, it was nice seeing you girls,” Slash commented as he watched the security guard walking directly towards them.

“I love the dress, can’t wait to rip it off you tonight,” Duff whispered in my ear sending goosebumps down my spine before his hand grazed across my ass. He sent me a smirk and followed Slash towards the security guard, so we wouldn’t get in trouble.

“Yup...just friends,” I turned to Sandy as she wore a smirk that would put Nikki Sixx’s smirk to shame.

[neshabeingchildish]

Hensley & Char: Friends or Whatever || Part 6

I have to warn y’all, this chapter has some sadness in it. I tapped into 15 year old me and how I was trying to navigate what I thought back then was me being bi, which IF someone calls me bi, I am not opposed to the able, even being technically ace, but for that time and for my feelings/experience and the language I had access to, that’s what I was considering myself as, but nobody knew that (though I was rumored gay by several people in high school, despite never seeing me in any relationships and me only ever speaking about male crushes to others) LOL, yes, Mama used to have male crushes irl, when I was a kid. But, I tapped into some of myself, but made it more Charlotte-like and leaned on the gay. Idk how well it will or won’t resonate, but I hope that I at least did Charlotte justice in her experience with looking inward, though her results may be disappointing, I hope that they at least come across as realistic, if not relatable or understandable. @just-a-j-reallly @junknstu1f @henryharts I’m not in a rush for feedback, as I know everybody has things going on. Hopefully my tags work out. A lot of people never get notified of them.

Also, as a heads up, the next chapter, whenever that might come, might also be sad too. I’m so sorry. 

The Jasper Juxtaposition

They had been trying to get Jasper into the fold of their outfit for a while. Ray wasn’t having it. Even whenever Charlotte basically throw her pride into a burning bin, seeping with trash juice, to pretend that she was secretly dating Hensley, but that they couldn’t tell anyone because, “Charlotte’s not out of the closet.” At this point, Charlotte was very heavily debating this ruse. 

There was an element of “people shouldn’t lie/joke about being in the closet,” which she strongly and firmly believed in… But… She went along with it anyway, because as she did her backstory for this test on Jasper, she found that she comfortably created the guise. 

“I can say that I’ve been curious about my sexuality for a while, and seeing you out of the closet, living your best gay life inspired me to come to you for advice on how to navigate figuring it out and in the process, we fell for each other and started dating secretly.”

Hensley laughed in her face and said, “It’s Jasper, Char. You don’t have to say all of that. Just be like, “We’re gay together, Dude.” He’s gonna accept it and be super chill about it. I’m not convinced there’s a pile of homo rattling around in him, if we’re being honest. PLUS, he thinks we’re both hot. He’s gonna get a kick out of us kissing and stuff.”

“I’m not kissing you!” Charlotte squealed.

Hensley turned up her nose, “What? Ew. No! Of course not. Ugh. This incites disgust, to think of it.” She shook her head, “Kissing a straight girl… in the mouth? I don’t know where your mouth has been. On boys, probably. I don’t want boy kiss transfer.”

“You kissed Chloe all the time!” Charlotte argued, unsure of why that was her response instead of arguing that she didn’t want to kiss Hensley (and hadn’t been kissing any boys, unless you counted kissing Jack Swagawitz at camp… which… she didn’t), and furthermore…

“Chloe was different, though. I really liked her,” Hensley said.

“You went out with Bianca as soon as you had a window,” Charlotte muttered.

“You told me to go for it! What? Now, I gotta stop listening to my smarter half?”

They bickered up until the moment that Jasper came over for them to feed him the lie. Whoa, were they bad at lying together… Fortunately, it was Jasper. Who, Charlotte was very disturbed by his fascination with the thought of them kissing. “Jasper is fetishing us, and I don’t like it,” she told Hensley.

“He’s not fetishizing you. He’s fetishizing fake lesbian you. It’s different.”

“Yeah, but… He’s… fetishizing lesbians!”

“He’s a dude. Dudes do that,” Hensley said, waving a hand. Charlotte didn’t like that explanation and it was often Hensley’s excuse for a number of sexist and problematic things that happened on her watch. Maybe it was for the best that Jasper didn’t pass the test. Then she’d have a problematic Hensley, and ANOTHER problematic guy at work. Ray was alright. He was nice, enough, but he said stuff sometimes that made her uncomfortable and he didn’t really listen whenever she pointed these things out. (Something that she had no idea would get worse over time, but that’s another subject.

Currently, the subject is Jasper. 

It took a while before Jasper came on board with the team. It took a while before he was ready for this secret. From the time that Hensley and Charlotte “broke up” until then, there were a lot of adventures that Hensley and Char saw together that made them really close in a way that Charlotte and Jasper were not, and even that Jasper and Henry were not. And in a way, for Charlotte, it was a lot like the fabricated story that she had spun - their secret involvement and the connecting together that nobody knew about… Also, since then, she had really been thinking about how easy it was for her to think of that, and how… relatable it felt, how natural it was to even imagine herself, keeping that sort of secret because she couldn’t tell people that she maybe… well… she didn’t really think it was so much a maybe these days… liked girls. 

More specifically, she maybe (and this WAS still a maybe), liked Hensley. Her hopeless heroine who she helped on a daily basis, and loved being so close to, even when she complained and fussed at her about the things that she deserved to be fussed at about. She would probably NEVER let her live down almost getting killed by Jasper’s crazy ex girlfriend, and she was so tired of Hensley always coming to her to get her out of stuff that she warned her about prior to the decision - like when she tried to go to the dance with Chloe as Kid Danger and Bianca as herself… STUPID HENSLEY! Charlotte decided, right around Jasper Dunlop Day that she wasn’t doing this anymore. She was going to explore her options and see what felt right. 

She bought a project board, some cards, and a science journal and she set up, literally in her closet, a little experiment center. She decorated the board, and across the top, had lettered, “Am I Gay?” Her hypothesis?: “I might be gay.” Procedure: Well, she supposed, she had to talk to some people, go on some dates, maybe kiss somebody? She shuddered. The amount of germs in saliva was terrifying to her. In fact, whenever she kissed Jack, she had threatened, “If you slip me any tongue, I’ll slip my fist right into your ribcage!” Needless to say, he slipped her no tongue.

But, her “experimentation phase” generally was not very successful for a number of reasons. 

First and foremost… meeting people? She wasn’t a fan. She joined the Student Council as a means to help her with a bit of self diagnosed social anxiety, but cared a lot about issues, so that she genuinely stayed in it to do community stuff and be a helpful member of the club. She met cool people, too! It was one of her things away from Hensley and away from Jasper, and wasn’t primarily academic, so she held it close to her heart as something for herself and decided against using it, and the fine people she met in it as lab rats for her orientation exploration.

Then, there was the little problem of personal space and unnecessary touching. There were very few people that she allowed into her bubble. Her parents, Uncle Roscoe, Hensley, Jasper, Piper, and Ray, and even with Ray, she tensed up for the longest time whenever he entered her bubble without warning. Even with that select amount of people who could be in her bubble, the only people that could casually touch her were her parents and Hensley. Sometimes Piper, but Piper had the respect to not touch her for no good reason. Unlike Hensley, who she simply had to get used to the fact that the girl was simply GOING TO just stand close, throw her arm around her, hug her, pick her up, play with her hair, tug on her backpack, or whatever she felt like doing at the time, and saying, “You should get permission before touching people,” just became background noise for Hensley, after a while, so Charlotte simply stopped saying it and adjusted. 

Jasper still sometimes got elbowed. It just wasn’t the same thing when a dude just touched you casually, she had initially thought. Maybe that wasn’t it at all and she just didn’t mind girls touching her as much, because she liked them? But… in order to figure that out, she’d have to let people in her bubble and let people casually touch her and see how she felt about it. 

So often, when it looked like somebody was getting too close, she stepped away, creating the distance of comfort for her and also, very clearly letting them see where it was. To the point that everybody who knew her knew not to get too close and everybody in her extracurriculars always did stuff like, “Hey Charlotte, I’m gonna take this lint off of you, okay?” (to which, she’d tell them to show her where it was and get it herself) or “Hi, Charlotte, do you mind if I sit here, or is that too close for you?”(To which she’d tell them to go ahead, but she’d move over more). She’d have to start telling people that being near her was okay, if she wanted to see her reactions to boys and girls and others in her proximity… And nowadays, they didn’t even ask anymore.

Even Mitch Bilsky would take one look at her and say, “UGH. The only space is by the queen of “don’t stand so close to me?” He’d then still do it, and even purposefully make her squirm, but she would resolve to ignore him and he’d get bored and move along.

But, she didn’t have very many times to test this out, and had to eventually rule out trying to get close to people (or let them get close to her) to see if she might feel a little flutter or not. 

Lastly, in addition to not being a people person and not wanting anybody in her personal space, The Man Cave was a whole ass full time job to maintain. She began to wonder what happened to people who previously worked for Ray/Captain Man? Even the ones that were there when she got there, and ones that would pop in and out for little assignments… after a while, she just didn’t see them, and she either was assigned their jobs, or took it upon herself to do them for worry of things going terribly wrong if she didn’t. Things went wrong in general, and she often felt like if she didn’t step in whenever she did, they could be downright disastrous. This job basically became her life. She never signed up for another marathon after dropping out whenever she thought the Super Volcano would kill them. She still had StuCo, but that was school related and when push came to shove, she only forsook the Man Cave for educational purposes, unless it was an extreme emergency.

In fact, she completely gave up on testing it all out and just let it bother her beneath the surface. Her conclusion: I’m more confused than ever, but technically… going to consider myself in the closet.

Imagine if I was as comfortable with myself as Jasper is…

You couldn’t tell that boy nothing. He protested stupid Swellview laws, jumped into hero mode to get his own hero day, wore belly shirts to everyone’s chagrin, was willing to go to tremendous lengths - sometimes extremely embarrassing ones - to get girls, and he overshared weird facts about his body with great excitement that just let you know that he adored these things about himself… 

She couldn’t even with certainty say that she MIGHT like girls, which, she was sure that she absolutely did, but she could hardly admit it to herself, much less out loud. What if it hurt her? What if it affected how she was seen by people on college boards or in the job field, once she left Swellview. Sure… there were YEARS before this happened, but Charlotte had been thinking ahead since she was small, and the moment she felt an inkling that her feelings may be… counterculture, she began to research related laws and statistics. 

Swellview didn’t have a big Black population. In fact, the demographics indicated that there were a lot more lgbt citizens than there were people who weren’t white, period. So, in Swellview, perhaps it wouldn’t be anything to be open about her sexuality… but… what if it was different for her, like a lot of things were. It was often different for her as a girl to be accepted in some spaces, to be listened to, to be respected. And it was frequently double different for her as a Black girl. Even the “good” people made her feel things that she often didn’t want to complain about, because they ALREADY thought she was an angry girl, when she couldn’t think of very many instances in which her anger was not justified. Research told her that was a common issue for Black girls and women. She didn’t have enough around her to touch base with, and was frustrated that she had to consider all of these intersections to even consider whether she would be free enough to have a sexual identity. 

Even with her academic record, immaculate articulation, and non-threatening appearance, Charlotte didn’t have many friends and didn’t have the best reputation. She was a nerd, but also, unfriendly. A Black girl in a male dominant world, in a white dominant city, and to possibly also be gay… she just… she couldn’t just toss that out there and have it attached to her name without knowing, and she felt like a coward for feeling like that. 

What would be the big deal, Charlotte? If that’s who you are… what would be so wrong about that? People be gay all over Swellview… but then again… everyday, she would see people be able to freely do things that she previously thought she WOULD never do, but as she got older realized that she wouldn’t do certain things, because she COULD never do them… not without possibly losing something. Chances? Respect? Heck, in certain areas of the world, her life. But, thinking this hard about it and not coming up with anything to push her to believe that she was indeed a straight girl, despite all of the reasons that it would be SO easy, and she loved easy things, despite her knack for tackling hard things. Why wouldn’t she just accept that she was straight, if that would make all of this anguish and confusion go away? She could just tell herself that she was straight and get it over with and move on… IF she was indeed straight. And if she wasn’t, no matter how much “experimentation” and hypothesizing she did, nothing would make her feel those feelings that she sometimes felt around Hensley, for some boy. 

So… She just sat with it. In her closet. She didn’t experiment and she didn’t hypothesize. But, in her science journal that she had previously been writing all of these things in, she scratched out her conclusion and wrote. 

Conclusion: I’m gay. 

But, she tore the page out and wadded it up. Then, she felt bad, straightened it back out, and slid it back into it's space. She tucked her cards into it and stuffed it into a lock box where she kept keepsakes and stuff, locked it in and got rid of her project board in the Junk n Stuff dumpster. 

She had been handling Kid Danger’s secret for a couple of years now and planned to hold on to it forever. She had time to figure out what to do with her own.

Besides… by the time Jasper got in on the secret… Things changed a lot, anyway.

[hoodmara]

Worth It •Nick Smut•

literally a concept I’ve been working on for THREE days and it’s long as fuck, so I hope it’s good lmao.

Concept: Nick is getting tired of jacking off, so Edwin tells him to fuck a fan (THAT’S BLUNT I KNOW IM SORRY)

Warnings: oral sex, language, lil bit of rough sex?

Please enjoy!

******************************************************

Nick’s right hand was growing tired.

He finished himself off with one last twist of his wrist and then felt the warm liquid hit the middle of his bare chest.

Letting out a deep sigh that he felt he had been holding in all day, Nick paused the explicit video he was watching and closed his phone.

He set it to the side and removed his airpods while grabbing for the rag that was hanging off of the small tv next to him. Cleaning himself up, he then jumped out of his small bunk to saunter over to the bus’ restroom.

Passing Edwin on the way, he let out a deep grunt in acknowledgement and kept it pushing. Edwin chuckled at his friend’s disheveled appearance and sent a quick wave his way.

“Another trip to the hub?” He asked jokingly, becoming very familiar with the boy’s masturbatory schedule. Nick’s eyes widened and he stopped in his tracks, turning to look at Edwin.

“Huh? What— what are you talking about?” Nick stuttered, the hand holding the soiled rag shifting behind his back.

Edwin teased his friend, but assured his privacy was not in danger. “Huh? What? Nick, come on, we both know that I’m not an idiot and that I can still see your fucking cum rag behind your back,”

Nick closed his eyes and ran his left hand across his forehead. He quickly opened the bathroom door and tossed the terry cloth into the laundry bag he kept behind the door.

Walking in, he quickly washed his hands and then retreated back to the lounge area where Edwin still held a goofy smile on his face.

“Ok fine, so I had a little alone time, is that a crime?” Nick inquired, plopping down on the couch across from his good friend.

“Look I’m not saying that I listen in on you doing what you do, but I’ve noticed you’ve been..uh...spending a lot of time alone lately and I just wanted to make sure that you’re good,”

Nick ran a hand through his hair and scratched the back of his neck, all the signs of a clearly stressed out Nick Mara.

“I don’t know, man...it’s been, like, a year since I’ve been with someone and I just— I get so..” Nick tried to make sense of his thoughts, but he couldn’t find a way to articulate them well enough. Thankfully Edwin picked up on his friend’s intended response.

“You’ve been bottling up your sexual energies and now it’s hit its’ peak,” Nick cringed at his friend’s honesty, but he knew he was right.

The idea of finally speaking about what had been on his mind was quite frightening. It wasn’t a big deal, everyone at one point got lonely, but Nick was someone who always put on a happy or unfazed face. Edwin pointing this out to him just made it feel like he didn’t do a great job of ‘faking it’.

“Do you have to say it like that?”

“What? Would you rather me say that you want to get your dick wet?” Edwin snickered, getting his daily dose of confidence from the way his friend was cowering at his words.

“God no, Edwin, what the fuck?” Nick groaned, making a sour face at the vulgarity of his friend’s words. Edwin laughed at Nick’s uncomfortable shifting and shook his head.

“When are you going to realize that you can talk to me about anything? It’s not like I’m gonna tell anyone, the rest of these bitches don’t even listen to me when I speak,” He replied, referring to the rest of their bandmates who were fast asleep on the bus. Nick felt bad about his standoffishness with Ed. He knew that if he had to talk about his…problems with anyone, it was best to do it with him.

“Look man, I’m sorry, alright? This just isn’t normal for me, I don’t get to a point where I can’t stop thinking about, you know, sex or being with someone,”

“Aye, I get it, it’s not something you want to bring up with the boys casually,” Edwin spoke, comforting his friend. He continued on, “especially with Zion, cause regardless of how much sex he’s not having, he will try to drag you.”

Nick laughed at the comment Ed made and nodded his head. Feeling more relaxed, he continued to speak on his problem in hand.

“Ok, so what do you think I should do? I can’t just keep rubbing one out ‘cause eventually, someone else is gonna catch me and I don’t want to explain myself,” Nick asked, hoping that Edwin would have a solution.

“Simple, just hook up with someone,” Edwin replied effortlessly, popping a cherry into his mouth from the forgotten bowl of fruit next to him. Nick shook his head in dismay.

“First of all, how? And second of all, I can’t just hook up with someone, we’re on tour, we live in a bus, and we’re constantly moving around,” He rattled off, not stopping after those few reasons, “not only that, but we have literal fans, Ed, what if I accidentally hook up with one of them and they start talking, huh? I can’t afford another scandal after I ran my dumb ass mouth that one time.”

“Hey man, you can call the shots all you want, it doesn’t have to be a random person, but let me just say this, getting with a fan was one of the best decisions I ever made,” Edwin smirked, running a hand over his freshly shaven head. Nick’s eyebrows raised at his friend’s confession.

“You slept with a fan?”

“Yeah, you remember that girl Rain? The one with the two nose piercings?”

“And the bright green hair? Yeah, I remember her, y’all were basically the same person,”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t meet her at a coffee shop, she was at the LA show last year and she slipped me her phone number afterwards,” Nick leaned back in shock, surprised that he never saw this coming.

He knew that the other boys did, in fact, hook up with fans, but he always saw it blow up in their faces. Zion actually had a girl threaten to pepper spray him because he never called her back and Nick did not want that same scenario to happen to him. But maybe Edwin knew something that Nick didn’t, so he gave the boy a chance to explain.

“How did you— like, how did that go? I’m assuming it went well, ‘cause y’all still talk, right?”

“Yeah, we’re really cool! We’re probably gonna meet up soon, too, ‘cause she goes to school in Michigan and she’ll be at the Detroit show,” Edwin smiled.

“And she’s not crazy or anything? Like, she’s not on twitter calling you out?”

“Look, I know Zion’s hookup story scared you off, but let’s both be honest, Z has shit taste in girls,” Nick couldn’t agree more, seeing as most of Zion’s exes have threatened to do or have done something crazy to him. Despite this truth, Nick was still having a hard time siding with Edwin.

“Ok yeah, but what if I get with someone who’s a fan and it’s great, right? But then I don’t call them after or I do want to call them after, but they tell those stupid drama pages? Like, what if—“ Edwin cuts Nick off before he can dive deeper into all the things that could go wrong.

“Nick, chill! Dude, it’s not that serious, alright? If you see someone that you find attractive, just ask for her number! Shit, if she likes you, you might not even have to ask. I’m telling you that Rain and I got along because she was a fan, we talked about the music we had coming out and what her favorite song was, it was a bonding experience,” Edwin inspired, hoping that Nick would see the good that came out of the situation.

“Alright Ed, I’ll take your word for it, but if this blows up in my face, don’t complain when I keep you up for another night at 3am to whine about it,” Nick replies, a small smile finally gracing his face.

Edwin grinned and stood up from his place on the couch. He walked over to pat nick on the shoulder.

“You won’t regret, Nick, I swear. Now, I’m gonna go to sleep because I’m tired as fuck, so don’t jack off too much back here,” Edwin joked, eliciting a chuckle and a quick ‘fuck you’ from Nick.

***************************************

“Yo, that show was fucking nuts, did you see that girl who flashed her titties? It was that one chick who always comes to the shows, I think her name is Allie?” Zion raved, rustling his dreads in a crisp white towel.

“Yeah, I saw that! She’s crazy, man,” Nick laughed.

Throughout the show, Nick couldn’t let Edwin’s words escape him. He spent the meet and greet, and a portion of the show seeking out someone who caught his eye. There were beautiful girls everywhere, some literally throwing themselves at him, but he just didn’t want to make the jump.

“I’m tryna go outside for a bit and talk to some people outside, you wanna come?” Edwin asked, walking into the dressing room from his shower. He looked directly at Nick, shooting him a wink. He knew that this was the best time to make moves, if any.

“Yeah, I’ll go out with you,” Nick replied, grabbing his phone off the table and following Ed into the hallway. The two boys crept quietly past some members of their team, knowing that they would try to stop them from greeting fans.

Finally rounding a corner into an empty hallway, Edwin spotted the exit that led towards the buses.

“So, you see anyone yet? There’s a lot of pretty girls out there,” Edwin inquired, speed walking to the door. Nick matched his speed and laughed.

“Not yet, man. But I’m not stressing,” Nick replied. The two finally reached the door and ran out, being met with a chorus of screams and greetings.

The two went out and mingled, saying hi to their beloved fans and taking as many pictures and videos as they could. Their staff eventually came out, along with a few security guards, to try and coerce the boys to get on the bus. Unfortunately for them, Edwin and Nick were much more stubborn than most, so they didn’t budge.

It was getting late and girls started to leave, particularly the younger girls, but many of the older ones stayed around. Nick was talking with a group of girls who travelled to Georgia from Tennessee and were planning to go the the New York show as well. A girl in the group stuck out to Nick, but he couldn’t make that known.

“So y’all are planning to travel back to Tennessee tonight? It’s one in the morning, you’re gonna be exhausted,” He chuckled, making the girls laugh.

“We’re in school still, so we got summer classes and missing those will get our asses in trouble,” one girl complained. Her friends all agreed, wearing the same annoyed face as their vocal companion. The girl looked behind her and pointed out the girl standing in the back, “This bitch is lucky though, ‘cause she gets to stick around for as long as she wants.”

The girl looked up and caught Nick’s eyes on her. If he could, he would’ve jumped over the barricade to get closer to her. The gold shimmer on her sepia brown cheeks shone bright in the street lights. She could feel her own skin getting warm from being the center of attention now.

“You’re not in school?” Nick asked her, genuinely interested. She shook her head and moved a little closer, finally able to be fully seen under the lights. The moment Nick got a full glimpse of this girl, his breath caught in his throat.

“Uh no, I just graduated! Also, my sister lives out here, so I’m staying at her place for a bit,” She responded, tossing a stray braid over her shoulder. Nick couldn’t help but watch her plump lips move as she spoke, responding to some of her friends comments. Nick nodded, finally digesting her words.

“I wish we could do another show out here, I love the ATL,” Nick smiled, the girls immediately agreeing. They all broke off into their own conversations, trying to include Nick but not talking directly to him. That gave him a chance to talk to this girl without it seeming shady. He moved a bit over to the side, leaning on the barricade where she was texting on her phone.

“Who you talkin’ to?” Nick smirked, jokingly trying to sneak a glance at her screen and getting a giggle out of the girl. She acted like she was hiding her phone from him and scoffed.

“Nobody told me that you were the nosey member of pretty much, they just said you were the cute one,” she replied. Nick’s eyebrows raised and he pursed his lips, making his classic flirtatious face.

“Oh, so you think I’m cute?”

“I mean, you definitely ain’t ugly, so when you do the math, I guess that means you’re cute or whatever,” she joked. The two laughed and shared a comfortable silence. Nick moved his body to the side to check on Edwin and in the process, brushed his hand over her own. Their eyes met quickly and she could see a faint blush happen upon the boy’s cheeks. She smirked and leaned forward, close enough so she could whisper, “are you flirting with me, Mara?”

Nick’s cheeks quickly went from pink to a darker shade of red, the boy cursing his genes for his ability to blush so easily. He couldn’t let her know that he was fazed, that was not in this ‘hookup’ plan. So he smirked like he always did when he tried to act tough and flirted back.

“Depends, is it working?” The girl kissed her teeth and tried to hide her smile. She could feel her own cheeks getting warm, but she was also too proud to come off as some fangirl who was trying to get in the pants of her favorite member. Even if that’s exactly what she was doing.

“What will it take for me to get you home?” she responded, fulling shooting her shot from half court. Nick chuckled and pulled his hat lower. He slowly pulled his phone from his pocket, opened it and slid it to her.

“Let me get your number and I’ll see what I can do,” He flirted. The girl took his phone and quickly tapped in her digits, trying to inconspicuously slide his phone back when she finished. Looking down, he saw her name and number.

Nick could see Edwin staring at him out of the corner of his eye and saw his teeth shining in the moonlight. He saw Ed start wrapping up his goodbyes and thought that he should do the same.

“So, Y/N, you free for the rest of the night?” Nick inquired, quietly. Y/N raised her eyebrows in surprise and laughed.

“Yeah, I’m free. My sister is on a business trip, so I’m watching her place,”

“No roommates?”

“No roommates,” She ensured. Nick smirked and nodded as he walked towards the other groups of girls, planning to say his goodbyes.

******************************************

“Where’s your bed?” Nick mumbled against the girl’s lips. She was straddling him on the couch in her living room, her long acrylic nails scraping down his bare chest.

“Down the hallway, last door on the left,” She replied, going right back to attack his lips. Nick moaned at the feeling, loving the way her teeth would tug at his bottom lip and then soothe the irritated skin with her tongue. He slid to the edge of his seat with her in his lap and stood, gripping tightly onto the back of her thick thighs. Effortlessly, he carried them both down the hallway, every once in a while running into a wall and eliciting a giggle out of the girl.

The moment Nick and Edwin met back up at the bus, Ed told Nick that he had to text Y/N to meet up. She was staying near their hotel and Edwin swore that he would cover for Nick while he was gone. He couldn’t argue with Edwin’s plea, especially because he really didn’t want to. With the way her red sports bra was accentuating her chest and the black bike shorts she wore hugged her ass, he didn’t think he could pass up the opportunity to spend one night with this girl.

Nick used one hand to hold Y/N in place as the other felt its’ way across the wall until it hit a curve and then a doorknob. Turning it quickly, Nick used Y/N’s back to open the door and he stumbled in, turning around and pushing her against the door, shutting it in the process.

He ground his hips into hers, both of them moaning at the friction. She was already out of her pants, so when Nick gently pushed his thigh into her heat, a spot of her wetness could be seen on his gray fleece shorts. Y/N tapped Nick’s hand under her thigh, signaling for him to let go so her feet could touch the ground. He obliged and gently let go of her legs. She stood in front of him and put her hands on his shoulders. Pushing him back, Nick fell back onto the bed. Y/N took that time to strip herself of her sports bra and kneel in front of Nick.

“Stand up,” she demanded. Nick quickly shuffled to his feet and moved to untie his shorts. Y/N’s hands crept up the sides of his legs and pulled down Nick’s pants, slightly giggling at the fact that he wasn’t wearing boxers.

“I was a little eager,” he joked, kicking the fabric away from his feet. Y/N smirked and began to play with Nick’s erect member. A breath hitched in Nick’s throat and his hands went to Y/N’s shoulders.

Trailing her tongue along the bottom side of his dick, she swirled her tongue around the tip once reaching it. She kitten licked at the precum seeping from his engorged tip, sending chills down Nick’s spine.

“God, you’re so good at that,” Nick commented, his words breaking as they came out. Y/N hummed on Nick’s member, causing him to let out a moan.

Soon, she took his cock completely, only leaving about an inch out. Her swollen lips latched on to his member as she hollowed out her cheeks and moved slowly. She gagged a bit on his size, but powered through. Nick couldn’t stand for much longer, his knees buckling at the sensation.

Y/N could feel the man weakening at her touch, so she removed him from her mouth and let him fall onto the bed.

“I’m not done, don’t worry, I just didn’t want you to fall,” she smirked. Nick rolled his eyes and shot a smirk back.

“I can’t lie, I was about to bust, but thanks for worrying about me,” he replied. The girl in front of him smiled and moved to take his erection back into her mouth, but Nick stopped her, “is it ok if I touch your hair?”

Y/N let out a loud laugh and nodded her head. Nick smiled and moved his hand to pull Y/N’s braids into a ponytail. She made a comment about Nick being a gentleman, making him laugh as she went back down to finish her work.

Skipping past any more foreplay, Y/N took Nick’s shaft into her mouth completely, choking a bit when her nose touched the base. Nick grunted at the feeling and help her out, moving her head in a steady motion. He could feel himself getting closer and closer to his breaking point. Y/N used her small hand to replace her mouth on the lower part of his dick. Her movements got sloppier as she sped up, her saliva making it easier as it coated his member.

“I’m gonna, I’m— I’m gonna cum,” Nick stuttered, his grip on her hair loosening. She mumbled a drawn out ‘mmhm’, pushing him to his climax.

The warm liquid ran down Y/N’s throat, Nick thrusting into her mouth to chase the last of his climax. Nick caressed the bare canvas of Y/N’s back, craving the feel of her soft skin. She let go of his cock, her teeth gently grazing the skin as she moved away. Y/N looked up at Nick through her eyelashes as she wiped the sides of her mouth. Nick let out an animalistic growl as he picked her up and tossed her on the bed. The girl laughed at the force, but was more ready than she had ever been.

“You treated me so nicely, baby, the least I can do is return the favor,” he smirked, pulling down her tiny black underwear. Immediately, he dived into her heat, his tongue licking at her clit fervently. Nick then took his finger and slid into Y/N’s entrance, curling up into her g-spot.

She fell into a moaning mess, not expecting the boy to eat her out. Y/N grabbed at Nick’s messy brown hair, pushing him farther into her heat. He continued to lap up her wetness until her moans began to come out much higher than before. He could tell that she was about to cum from the way she was clenching around his finger, so he moved away from her.

Y/N lifted her head when she felt Nick pull away. Shooting him a confused look, she kissed her teeth.

“What the hell, I was close!” She whined, making the boy laugh. He leaned down to grab a condom from his pocket and used his teeth to rip it open. Sliding it on, he pumped himself a few times before moving back onto the bed.

“I gotchu, girl, don’t worry,” he smiled, then continued, “you ready for me?”

Y/N nodded excitedly and pulled him on top of her. With one hand on the side of her head and the other one lining himself up with her entrance, Nick slowly slid his cock into her. A drawn out whimper came from Y/N’s mouth as Nick grunted at the tight feeling of her hole.

“Nick I want more,” Y/N begged, her nails scraping his back. Nick sped up his thrusts, the sound of skin slapping filled the room. He hummed as he left open mouth kisses on her neck. Y/N started to clench around Nick, prefacing her orgasm. The tightness of her heat made Nick’s eyes roll back, the hand that was holding him was shaking and pulling at the sheets. Y/N tapped Nick on the chest, so he met her eyes.

“I want to ride you,” she said. Nick’s eyes grew wide and he nodded quickly, almost coming at the thought of her on top. Quickly, he flipped the both of them over. Y/N moved into a squat position, lining Nick up with her entrance. Sinking down, he clutched onto her thigh at the new feeling. She bounced quickly on his dick, throwing her head back at the feeling. Nick moved his hands from her thigh to play with Y/N’s hard nipples. She moaned loudly and moved her own hand to toy with her clit.

The two of them were in complete bliss, nearing their orgasms quickly. Nick silently thanked Edwin for the idea and pushed his head back into the pillows, bracing for his second climax of the night.

“I can’t take much more, babe,” Nick mumbled, trailing his fingertips down her chest to rest on her thighs. He began to thrust up, meeting her own. Y/N had her bottom lip clenched in between her teeth in concentration. She fell to her knees from her squat position, but continued to slide Nick in and out of her.

“Me either, I think I’m about to—“ as she spoke, her orgasm hit, her mouth widening. The way she tightened around him and the look on her face pushed Nick over the edge, filling the latex with his warm seed. He kept messily thrusting up. Y/N had to put a hand on his pelvis to slow him down.

Falling forward, her chest met Nick’s and he wrapped an arm around her waist. Leaning over the bed, he picked up his phone to check the time. His clock read 4:18 and he hissed, shocked that it was so late.

“You have to leave, don’t you?” Y/N asked, weakly lifting her head up from his shoulder. Nick sadly nodded and frowned at the breeze he felt when she rolled off of him. He turned to sit up in the bed and placed his feet down on the carpet.

Nick grabbed his pants and began to slide them on. Y/N handed him his phone and got up to walk him out. She slipped on her panties and opened the door for him.

Collecting his T-shirt in the living room, Nick grabbed his sweatshirt and handed it to Y/N.

“Keep this, I’ll get it back from you the next time we hang out,” he said, making the girl smile. She pulled it on and shoved her hands into the pocket.

“So we’re gonna hang again?”

“I would like to, even though I don’t come out to Georgia or Tennessee often,”

“Well it’s a good thing I travel for work,” Y/N smirked, Nick raiding his eyebrow in response.

“What are you doing in a month?” He asked.

“Coincidently, I’m in California for a shoot,” she replied.

“Well, if you want to, I’d definitely love to see you at our LA show?”

“Are you sure that won’t compromise our little secret?” Nick thought about what Y/N said, since it was a concern of his to not get caught. But being around Y/N made the idea easier to bear, and much more exciting after their night together. Getting an alert on his phone that his ride had arrived, Nick smiled.

“Nah, and even if it did, I think you’re worth it,” he flirted, leaving the girl with his usual charm.

[lonestarbabe]

Holding Out For A Hero

Chapter 2: You Can Call Me Al

T.K. meets his new bodyguard, and Carlos immediately knows he has his work cut out for him.

T.K.

Substances rushing through his body, T.K. was in a great mood and looking for some sexual release. He searched the crowded gay bar for some who struck his fancy. His eyes landed on the biggest guy in the room, who couldn’t hide if he wanted to. His brown skin glistened with a sheen of sweat and the lights hit his brown eyes in a way that almost made them look green.

It took him a second of contemplation, but T.K. finally recognized the guy as a vague recollection of past encounters popped into his mind. Good times. The guy had stamina, T.K. knew that, but he couldn’t remember his name. All T.K. knew was that this dude had biceps the size of T.K.’s head and that Muscles’ mouth would be wasted on romantic words. I’m just looking for sex, not love, T.K. reminded himself. Muscles was the perfect sex tool for T.K. just as T.K. was to muscles. Mutual objectification—check. I want it rougher than sandpaper and as heartless as the tin man.

Sidling up to Muscles T.K. leaned his arms against the bars so that his muscles were popping. “I was thinking about getting out of here.” T.K. and Muscles skipped the small talk whenever they hooked up. Maybe that’s why I don’t know his name. It’s better off that way, anyway. Names can ruin everything. Adolph? Instant turn off.

“Looking for a ride, sugar?” Muscles asked with a cocky grin, which is well deserved.

T.K. winked, “Only if you have tinted windows. I’m careful about who I’m seen with.”

“Husband?” T.K. wasn’t sure if Muscles recognized him or not, but Muscles treated him like a stranger, which caused some identifiable feeling to curdle in T.K.’s stomach. Being known was scary, but not mattering to someone was horrifying. T.K. nearly walked away, hating the way this guy made him felt, but he couldn’t move his feet. I couldn’t even remember his name? Why would he remember mine? Being a celebrity, anonymity was nice and rare, but to not be remembered by a past lover was personal.

T.K. forced a smile. Flirting is my specialty. Well, not really, I don’t have to flirt much. I just have to be easy. “Definitely not. I can’t imagine being married. Let’s just say that some people in my life can’t appreciate what I do.”

“Ah, homophobes.”

“Nah, not that either. Just people who don’t know how to have fun.”

“Even worse.” Yeah, right, because hating people is so much better than sitting at home and reading for the evening. T.K. wasn’t going to go into a tirade on some passing comment that had been meant as a joke. Maybe it’s my fault for lacking a sense of humor.

“What the hell are you doing?” a firm voice rang in T.K.’s ears. For a second, he thought he was having an auditory hallucination before he turned around to see the hottest guy he’d seen in at least four months.

“Who are you?”

Muscles licked his lips, “I’m willing to share, but I’m in charge.” Two men, I can get behind that.

Hot Guy didn’t even look at muscles. “Come on, tiger, you’re not sleeping with him.” The guy pulled T.K.’s arms from the bar, and T.K. lost his balance, nearly falling before he was steadied by the newcomer.

“What? Are you his boyfriend or something?” Muscles asked, puffing his chest. His veins popped out, and he was clearly trying to look tough, but it was hard to take him seriously in the flowered bowling shirt he’d worn for Hawaii night.

“Who are you to tell me who to sleep with? It sure won’t be you.” T.K. turned to Muscles, shrugging Hot Guy’s hand off his shoulder. “Ignore him. I don’t even know who he is. As I told you before, I don’t have a boyfriend.”

“Husband. You said you didn’t have a husband.”

“I don’t have a finance either before you ask.”

Hot Guy pulled T.K. toward him with a gentle tug. Muscles pulled him back. This is not tug the T.K. Hot Guy won out. He spoke clearly. “I’m your new bodyguard. Carlos Reyes. I have the paperwork if you need to see it.” Carlos, now that’s a nice name.

T.K. waved him off, giving him a once over. “Oh, I bet you are. You look the part. Big, strong, no fun. You’re way hotter than most, but you still have responsibility in your beautiful eyes.”

“A bodyguard?” Muscles looked shocked. “Why would you need a bodyguard?”

T.K. shrugged. “Like I said, people in my life are killjoys.”

Carlos pulled out his I.D. to show it to T.K. “You shouldn’t take my word for it. I could be any old loser.”

T.K. looked skeptical “And you can’t fake an I.D.?”

“I also have the some paperwork in my pocket if you want to see that too. Signed off by Judd.”

T.K. laughed again, “At the moment, words just look like squiggles. He squinted at the I.D. again, seeing Carlos’ picture. ”Very pretty squiggles.”

Muscles was growing impatient. “Can we go now? Or would you rather talk to the guy with a stick up his ass.”

“Of course, I prefer you, muscle man,” T.K. said looping his arm around Muscles’ broad shoulders, ushering Muscles off the bar stool. Muscles was broader but Carlos looked like he knew how to win a fight if the steel in his eyes was any indication. “Don’t worry about him. I’m his boss. He’ll leave if I tell him to.”

“We’re going,” Carlos countered with stern eyes.

“Judd said you didn’t start until tomorrow, so the way I see it, you’re not my bodyguard yet.” I’m not going to let any hot guy boss me around, especially one doing so on behalf of Judd Ryder.

Carlos tapped his watch. “That was yesterday. It’s after midnight now. Judd told me—”

“Yeah, well, you don’t get to tell him who to sleep with,” Muscles rose from where he was leaning against the bar, standing to his full six-foot-five height.

“You’ll stay right there.” Carlos pushed the dude back down into a seat. “He’s too high to know an apple from a pear.”

“Who the fuck cares? We’re just having fun.” Muscles wasn’t going to back down, and T.K. really didn’t want to cause a fight. He just wanted to go home with a man who would show him a good time.

“He can’t consent when he’s like this, asshole. He probably won’t even remember tonight.“ The fire in Carlos’ eyes was sexy, but T.K. rolled his eyes at the sentiment. The forgotten nights were the best ones.

“I want sex, and I could tell an apple from a pear anytime,” T.K. complained indignantly, looking between Muscles and Carlos. “The pear is the one that takes like a watered-down apple.”

“I need to take you home,” Carlos said with only a hint of exasperation, which meant he was a lot more annoyed than he let on.

T.K. looked confused. “What? Are you mad?” A look of realization filled T.K.’s face. “Oh, he must be a pear fan.” Then, T.K. was giggling uncontrollably, and both Carlos and Muscles looked at him like he was crazy. I am. As crazy as a… something that’s really crazy… a dude named Tyler Kennedy.

Crazy or not, Muscles still seemed up for fun. “Calm down, bro. I’m not going to do anything that he doesn’t want. I know what T.K. likes.” He does remember me, after all.  T.K. felt a pang of affection that he quickly chased away.

“I don’t care what he wants. My job is keeping him safe, so go find someone else to screw. Preferably, someone who can stand up without swaying.” Oh, maybe that’s why I feel like I’m on a boat.

Before the topic could be discussed any longer, Carlos grabbed T.K. and dragged him through the crowd.  When they were outside, T.K. rubbed the arm where Carlos had grabbed him. He shivered. “You could have been gentler with me. Judd won’t like you hurting his best merchandise.”

“You’re fine, and don’t call yourself merchandise. You’re a human being. If you weren’t, Judd wouldn’t care so much.”

Carlos pulled out his phone and called T.K.’s driver. When T.K. tried to walk away, going who knows where, Carlos reeled him back in with his free hand. Why are his arms so long. He doesn’t have the biceps of Muscles, but he’s as close as you can get without steroids. After hanging up the phone, Carlos shoved T.K. down to a bench while they waited for the car to arrive. Carlos remained standing, looming over T.K. “What did you take?”

T.K. shrugged. “Just some shots.” Shots alone don’t feel this good.

Carlos didn’t buy the bullshit. “And?” He’d been around celebrities to know that T.K. had more than a few shots.

“I think some E, but I didn’t really look at what it was.” I’d have taken it no matter what it was.

“Fuck. You can’t take random pills and expect it to be okay. That could kill you, T.K.”

“I’m not dead yet.” Not sure whether that’s for the best.

“Did that loser give them to you?” Carlos’ fists were clenched at the mere mention of Muscles.

“Nah, Muscles is cool. We’ve hooked up before. He’s as much of a gentleman as I want him to be. Drugs and sex are part of being a rock star.”

“You sing pop songs,” Carlos countered.

T.K. grinned. “Rock star is a state of mind.” Carlos didn’t say anything, but he let T.K. press his body against Carlos’ side.

They sat in silence until a familiar car drive up to the curb. T.K. was glad to see his driver, but he’d gotten pretty comfortable on the bench. It would be nice to go to sleep, but he could do that anywhere if he could get his mind to shut off. He was always so tired, but he still felt wired from the substances rushing through his body. His brain was wired, at least. His body felt like a pile of noodles, slightly ahead of his racing thoughts that would soon come to a startling halt.  

“The car is here.” Carlos’ voice sounded floaty. T.K.’s body didn’t budge even though his brain told him he should get up. Carlos pulled T.K. up when he wouldn’t budge, moving him to the car like a ragdoll.

“Oh, man handle me some more. I like it,” T.K. said hollowly. T.K. felt his mind drifting, going to that faraway place where he wasn’t part of the normal world anymore. No matter how many people were around, he would feel detached from everything, even himself. It’s really nice. Calm. Easy. No complications.

“That what you want from that guy in there?” Carlos asked in a strange voice that T.K. couldn’t make sense of.

“There’s nothing wrong with liking it rough. I can give it as good as I take it.”

“No, there’s nothing wrong with it. But I don’t think you wanted rough sex from that guy. You wanted him to hurt you.” I wanted him to break me and not bother to put me back together.

“Is that so bad?”

“It is when you’re using it to punish yourself.”

“What would I punish myself for?” For being a purposeless waste of space maybe? For being an awful son? For being a poser? For hating myself?

Carlos shook his head. “Never mind. I don’t know you. Only what Judd told me about you. This conversation is wasted on you, anyway.”

“I’m wasted,” T.K. laughed tiredly, letting his head fall to Carlos’ shoulder. For someone who was so muscular, Carlos’ shoulder was a nice cushion, firm but with just right the amount of softness. If T.K. could find a pillow with that exact balance, maybe he could sleep without first getting high.

“Yeah, T.K., I know, but soon you’ll be back to normal.”

T.K. sighed before letting his eyes drift closed. “Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of.” He didn’t hear if Carlos responded. He’d already taken refuge in the blackness of sleep. It’s better than gray.