#no guarantee itll work but trying is better than not trying

[mariacallous]

Ugh this probably says more abt me and my circles than anything else but like. Its legitimately mood-alteringly disappointing rn trying to talk to or deal w other people. It doesnt matter what issue we're talking abt - democracy at home or abroad, international conflicts, climate change, poverty, capitalism - all anyone wants to do is agree abt how shit it all is and then like hope or root for the end of the world somehow and then like wow look how smart and "real" we're being it cant go on like this etc etc like SHUT UPPPPPP!!!!!! People would really rather just HOPE for things to get immeasurably worse bc they dont want to do the work to think abt solutions or even the fact that there ARE things within our power to improve is somehow idk annoying to hear abt?? I guess??? Every time i try to point it out they act like im naiive or childish somehow, they dismiss me showing up to abortion protests as doing nothing AND when i canvass for county level protections as nothing???? If i bring up water catchment systems as a solution to water insecurity in our area (arizona....lol) "itll never work" "zoning boards would never do anything" its like. I feel so stunted like im TIRED of listening to people give up like this, and i hate being dismissed for pointing out real solutions!!! Actually getting 50 people excited about city elections IS more impactful than posting through it!!!!!!!!!!! Idk how IM the dumb one here it feels lonely and isolating rn tbh anyway thank U for being one of the ppl i consistently follow who doesnt just give into sensationalism and exhausting knee-jerk reactions etc

I mean, on one level they’re right - these things WON’T happen, at least not if anyone doesn’t do anything. So it becomes a self-fulfilling masturbatory prophecy.

It’s also easier to ignore all the examples of when people showing up does work - when the right candidates get elected and now the right policies and laws can be passed. The right people speak up at the right meetings and the organization makes different, better choices.

The problem is that life isn’t a movie where we can move through a montage of the scenes and work to get to those moments. You have to live and work, and also recognize that success is not guaranteed. Sometimes the other side is better organized, better funded, better positioned. But you keep fighting and working. You look at what’s not helping or benefiting and make changes. You identify the new allies to complement the ones already there. Reach out to the inactive and under approached.

There is so much we can individually do that adds up on a larger scale.

[xurkitrainer]

My completely disorganized thoughts about the AI professor. Im only gonna refer back to Turo since i only played violet.

I dont think the AI ever planned on going through the time machine. That was a last minute decision it made after the paradise protection protocol (PPP) happened. It didnt know about the PPP.

Turo chose not to tell AI about PPP. It has all of Turo's knowledge and thoughts, and yet it didnt know about PPP. Turo made sure it didnt know. Even though the mechanism he put in place for PPP to lock all pokeballs except those by the professor wasnt exactly hidden, it was in a note on a desk in the very same room the AI had to stay in. Im wondering why Turo would prevent AI from knowing about it. Maybe to ensure absolutely nothing could possibly stop it?

The amount of precautions Turo took to ensure nothing could stop the time machine... well, its obvious when the AI says "was keeping the time machine running truly all the professor cared about?" I think the answer there is, yes. That is all he cared about. He made sure the AI could battle better than anyone else, he made sure the time machine could only be activated by his personal copy of the violet book, he made sure the time machine could be reactivated if, for whatever reason, the AI wasnt able to protect it, he made sure that the AI could be completely overrun by an entirely different program in such an event, he made sure it could be reactivated over and over again as long as the AI was there. I wouldnt doubt it if Turo purposefully didnt tell AI about PPP because he may have thought about the slightest possibility of the AI going against his wishes, so he wanted to ensure that itll work out the way he wanted it to no matter what.

AI Turo wouldnt have gone through the time machine if it werent for PPP. It only made that decision because it realized that PPP would still be active along with the machine if it stayed. AI wanted to stay. Even if it did want to see the future world, i think it wouldve prioritized staying in present paldea. I think AI cared more for Arven than Turo did.

I think the AI never processed its own feelings until we meet it. It clearly intended to speak to Arven about the entire situation, probably one-on-one. It wanted to reconcile with him. I fully believe that when it says "your father truly loved you", it actually meant it was itself who loved Arven as its own son, and it just wasnt capable of seeing its own feelings as anything outside of Turo. Not that i think Turo stopped caring entirely, but he definitely didnt care as much as the AI thought he did, or shouldve. But Turo was the only other person it interacted with, other than the player and Clavell, and then later on the friend group. AI only knew about people from information and memories from Turo. It doesnt know how to properly normally communicate, and it tries its best to act normal about everything thats happening, especially when Arven tries to speak to it directly, and even more especially when it glitches out. It was trying to find a good time to tell Arven about Turo's death. It wanted to turn off the time machine to save paldea, even if it meant going against what Turo wanted, because it cared for the region. It knew what was best for the people there, and it definitely wasnt future pokemon destroying everything. It knew Arven was still out there, mostly alone.

Its yearn to see the future comes from Turo. But its not what the AI really wanted for itself. And then theres the issue of the AI itself and how it functions. It tells us that its kept active by the tera energy all throughout the lab and then says thats why it cant leave the lab. And it knows this. Going through the time machine had no guarantee of keeping it active. Maybe it could see the future world, for a little bit, but ultimately it would die without the tera energy. And it is well aware of this. It wanted to stay with us, with Arven, but couldnt because if it did, it would put everyone in danger. So it made sure the time machine could never be activated again by going through the machine and taking the violet book with it, shutting the whole thing down permanently. It tells us that there is no way back through the machine, that a person who goes to the future would not be able to come back, but i think its doubly true for the AI since not only would it be stuck in the future, it would also just be dead. Of course, it wouldnt just tell everyone that, especially not Arven. It tried its best to reassure Arven despite the circumstances, so it wouldnt just straight up tell him that now it has to die to save everyone. It would at least allow Arven to believe his last connection to his father is still alive, somewhere in some other time, and be able to move on better.

[charkie-ee]

NOOOOOO THE SUN CANT TAKE YOU SEMIFONTOS YOU’RE TOO POWERFUL TO LOOSE!!!!! that damn bastard. when i get the sun its all over. … yes for me. dont let me get the sun.

hope you’re feeling better!! stay hydrated & find as much shade as you can when outside!!! (i have to remind myself this everyday too dw)

HEELPP LMFAOOOO

who let you be this funny. i cant compete anymore. you cant just make me laugh while reading your post every time. where are the funny police.

honestly tho? if you really want to try them again, there are two options: 1. if you wear them, say they’re for sunglasses so you dont loose them? itll maybe work? idk. no guarantees. 2. make em yourself! for household items, a thicker yarn/chain necklace and rubber bands will probably do the trick. or, you can buy a bracelet/necklace making set and workshop an eyeglass strap(thats the actual name of it btw- i had no idea lmao).

ahhh, gotcha gotcha. honestly? i think i went thru the same thing. like— sure, the glasses helped my eyes a lot when i was younger but now, when i take off my glasses my sight is a lot worse than it was 6 years ago.

oooouuuuuuu golden rimmed circular glasses are the absolute BOMB!! i used to have some a few years back and i looooved those. buuuttt then i started looking for more ‘masculine’ frame shapes to help with dysphoria. ever since then ive been stuck with metal square shaped frames. sighhh, bein a cool guy comes at a price.

however, if i could choose any glasses nowadays, i would either choose a really funky shape- like the ones they have at hot topic(it always comes back to that store..), or golden rimmed aviators.

like these? idk. this is fire in my eyes.

dang!! i always forget how expensive prescription glasses can get. i’m glad the frames weren’t all that expensive. i remember one time i had just gotten a new prescription, and the place that i used to get my frames was closing down, so they had a sale for 2 prescription glasses, sunglass or regular, for roughly 400 dollars(~145k forint). and. holy shit. did i ride that wave. i didnt buy a new pair for 2 years.(probably not good but yknow)

thats the downside of being near sighted, when you’re with other people who can see its like WHAT. THAT SIGN SAYS WHAT. ITS HOW FAR AWAY AND IT SAYS WHAT.

ahem. here is a totally accurate and not at all exaggerated drawn 2d interpretation because i was bored and didnt feel like going to bed. enjoy.

what the sign actually says btw:

hey all of the like. 6 followers i have. if you dont have prescription glasses you have to leave. sorry guys i dont make the rules. /j

i trust semifontos math, much more than any other math classes ive taken. honestly you could create a whole new measuring system and id be 110% on board with it. id say yep. its semifontos math, it checks out.

(also i said i was gonna draw this and i did)

@semifontos

GRAAAAAAHHHHH!!!! (i crawl out of my grave but this time kill bill style)

IM STILL ALIVE!!! I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMISE I PROMI—

but it is done!!!! i did it!!!!! after years in training, various classes in alchemy, and many many engine failures!!!!!!! it is FINISHED!!!!!!!!!

behold, the SEMIFONTOS DESIGN:

im so so sorry that this took so long and might not be as high quality as my other art— but i hope you enjoy it!!

gonna be honest, a screw was loose on my glasses and my right lens fell out just as i started working on this again. so. if any lines look wonky you can file all complaints to my prescription glasses.

but, yea!! there it is!! i plan to start being more active! i swear! i just have a lot goin on rn!! may reblog/post some other things later. we’ll see how it goes. luv u pal & thanks 4 bein patient!!

[crowsent]

How do you stay so cheerful? I read your tags and you seem like a funny and happy person. What's your secret?

had this ask for a while and i had no idea how to tackle this. lowkey no idea how you thought i was a funny and happy person from my tags since all i do is bitch about shit but uh. thanks? no idea how you got this impression of me but its very kind of you to say this. so. anyway.

im not cheerful. i havent been genuinely cheerful since the third grade. when i was in fourth grade i was already bitter and cynical and constructed so many walls around myself and my emotions that now, years later, i have no idea how to bring them down. by fifth grade, i became an angry and petty person. by sixth grade i developed trust issues. by seventh grade, i learned how to use humour to deflect everything and ignore the world. i think my first depressive episode was when i was ten. i straight contemplated whether or not i should be alive when i was ten and it only got worse from there.

me trying to be as kind as i can to others doesnt necessarily mean that im cheerful. its just that me being sad and tired and angry does not mean that i can be cruel or unkind to other people. its unfair of me to take out my frustrations about everything in my life on the world, so i try my best to be good and kind and be as respectful and courteous as i can be. the peppy excitable attitude i have is a farce so i dont bring in my negativity onto people who have nothing to do with my issues.

BUT. that doesnt mean that i cant try. people say fake it til you make it and thats what im doing. or trying to. im not actually genuinely happy but trying to keep my spirits up is infinitely better than just stewing in my depression. its a struggle to put on a smile and not say the first cynical thing that pops into my head, but i have to try. recovery is a process. its not a race, its a marathon. and for me, its a marathon with the goal being moved further and further away every so often. but if i dont at least try to run, then im never getting anywhere.

life is shit. for me at least. my depression is painful. i have chronic pains that sucks like a fucking turbo powered vacuum and sometimes i get suicidal ideations and have to lock myself in my room so i dont wander into the kitchen. but that doesnt mean that itll be shit forever. or that itll be bad every day. if today was something conjured from the depths of hell, maybe tomorrow would be good. or at the very least, suck less. so ill pretend to be happy, maybe crack a few jokes, and thatll distract me from the now.

and if my writing or my jokes or the comments i make brings a smile to someones face or makes their day brighter by a fraction or even makes them forget the present, even if its just for a little bit, then good. just because im miserable, doesnt mean that everyone else has to be. if i can make someone smile then im happy.

if youre struggling with depression or anxiety or something in your personal life and looking for a reason to be cheerful, then find a reason. any reason. maybe you have a pet. or maybe you have a fav show or book or something. maybe you have a hobby. maybe you have some friends you promised to hang out with or some chores you need to do or some yoga or singing or whatever. i cant give you a secret way to be cheerful because i dont have one. the method i use for dealing with suicidal thoughts is to lock myself in a room where there’s nothing i can use to hurt myself with and wait for the ideations to pass. that method might make things worse for you. it might not work. i dont know your situation. the only advise i can give you is to keep living. any reason to live is worth it. dont care what the reason is. hope. faith. love. spite. find a reason to live and live. the best i can say is that most of my joy comes from writing so try and find a hobby that you like.

tl;dr: anon. i try to just be as kind and positive as i can be and hope for something good happening tomorrow. kinda got derailed a lil bit there. sorry.

also. i feel like i should mention this.

im not cheerful and im not happy. im just a very good liar.

[thoi2020]

u have advanced??????? wow. tips to qualify mains please??? help me with my modules.how do i solve them?????????

hnnng idk bestie here's some short tips n like if u want something more specific u can send another ask or dm me?

pay attention in class. sit in the front. listen out for what things the teacher puts an emphasis on. ask questions. yes, even the stupid ones. especially the stupid ones bc those are fundamentals u cannot miss bc a shaky foundation leads to a shaky building. also pay attention to ur teachers. theyve been doing this since before u even knew about jee they know what theyre doing. most of them want whats best for u, and if not specifically that, whats best for them n their institute which are usually similar things. im not saying blindly trust them without criticism but have some faith. dont dismiss them they prolly know better than u. if id followed my teachers instructions i prolly wouldnt have had to drop (but thats a discussion for another day lol).

revise notes on a regular basis. like. the day u studied it in class. then the next day. then a week later. then 2 weeks later. then a month later. google the curve of forgetting for more accurate time stamps. use flashcards for formulae n stuff that u have to memorise like inorganic chem.

analyse past papers. recognise the most important topics. but also there are some small chapters that are quite easy and some people skip them thinking there wont be any questions from them. ive given 4 papers of mains, and i can confirm that is utter bullshit. 1 question each from units and measurements, mathematical reasoning, stats, chemistry in everyday life, polymers, are guaranteed. u can easily secure at least those marks by spending just a little bit of time on them. esp for jee mains its relatively better to cover a wide range of topics with medium depth instead of just some but with deep understanding (the latter works well for advanced tho).

make a friend or two whos in the same boat as u, preparing for jee n try to keep each other accountable. tell each other everyday what ure going to study that day n then check back the next day. remind each other hlep each other out. also be friendly with the class toppers sometimes they can solve ur doubts better than teachers just bc something they explain clicks better. whenever i get confused about logarithms i think back to what my 9th grade classmate told me when i asked him to explain in 1 sentence n had him repeat it slowly to me multiple times. its burned in my memory and helped me so much. 

practice tests. set the proper 3 hour limit and solve them. be honest w urself ure doing this for u. no point scoring 256/300 to impress ur teacher if u cheated bc on the day of the exam ure going to be screwed. in the beginning try out different strategies, different ones work for different ppl. like for me, math is my favourite and i find it easier than the other 2 so i do it first and it gives me confidence. then i move on to physics and then chem. some people look over the entire paper n solve the easiest from every section first, then the medium ones, then the tough ones. experiment in ur practice tests n figure out whats best for u n ur test taking. after the test, analyse. see what u got wrong, why u got it wrong. clarify doubts. mark problem questions to revise and solve again later. no point in solving more n more questions if theres no retention or learning.

for solving books specifically under the cut bc this is getting too long lol:

stick to 1 or 2 books max per subject. make them ur holy books and swear by them. if ure doing coaching then the modules provided by them are a very good option bc theyre specifically for jee and will cover what u need. coaching teachers will have a lot of experience with them too so u'll have an easy time with doubts clarification. if u choose other books tho, still consult with ur teacher and ask them to tell u what's relevant and what isnt and dont waste ur time on whats not. it might make u look or feel smarter to be solving questions on stuff thats beyond the scope of the exam but u literally dont need it and the syllabus is already very vast so ure just going to waste time and brainspace. like sure if ure interested study it in ur own time but dont make it an Important Must Do thing.

ok now that u have ur book with everything relevant to jee, make sure u devour them. study the theory alongside ur class notes. solve a few questions of corresponding topics the day they are covered so u dont have so many questions lined up at the end of the chapter. like if i studied friction in newton's laws of motion today, i'll solve the questions relevant to friction today itself. or u know this week. like,, keep it current. then while solving, speak out loud and explain the problem to urself like ure teaching someone else (or better yet, find someone to teach them to. stuffed toys, younger siblings, ur classmate, grandparents, online friend, whichever works). mark all the questions that took u longer than 5 mins or u cant solve at all. dog ear the pages. try them again the next day. then again a few days later. take the ones u still cant solve to ur teacher. try n ask for just a hint once and try again. and then if u cant then ask for the solution. DO NOT go on the internet. ur brain doesnt have to work for it then n u think u got it but u dont got it. make ur brain work for the solution so it'll remember. 

now that uve given a good shot to every question and figured out where u stumble. analyse a bit. find a pattern if theres any: like a certain concept that is weak or something ure not understanding. read the theory for it if u have to n ask questions to clarify. then solve these problem questions again and again until u know every question well enough to be able to explain to someone. skip over the easy ones u dont gotta do them again n again, focus on the ones u stumbled on. theyre the weak spots. no use strengthening whats already strong enough.

and uh keep a notebook of the solutions of the questions u solve so that u dont have to go crazy searching for them in an emergency. like ur paper is tomorrow and u cant figure out this question that uve been trying for 1 hour then its a good time to review ur previous solution and refresh ur memory. often if uve practiced enough n its just exam stress etc thats making ur mind go blank then just a hint will be enough to remind u.

also this is more general but just. be consistent. small consistent efforts over multiple days instead of a big one in 1 day. u’ll retain better and ur brain does better with multiple small chunks spread out over an interval than a lot of stuff in a small one. and its ok to to have an off day dont kill urself over academics ur health is more important always. not getting into ur dream college might fuck u up but itll heal but ur health is more precarious and not getting enough sleep or food will def fuck u up and the consequences are a lot harder to deal with. dont think about the big picture or u’ll freak urself out just think about the next small step u can take. getting 99 percentile feels impossible but solving 10 questions for it does not. dont get disheartened by test results if ure working hard n smart u wont fail. even if u dont get into ur dream college u’ll have an excellent work ethic that’ll take u places u never thought of in ur wildest dreams. more than anything, be kind to urself and work n play hard.

[disappointmentprofile]

Why don't you and your recent ex try to just be friends or on decent term....... your soul glows when you try to work things out and I want 2 see you be some1 good. Talkin' abt your recent cuz you both good but just too young

Honestly it's just such a huge misconception people had about our relationship bc all the good things were out there. But bc I dont speak up on a lotta things nobody really knows about the amount of disrespect and humiliation that that one person put me thru

I mean imagine dating someone that's telling people out there that you're this horrible human being and all the while you're sleeping next to him thinking everythings perfect. No, nobody does that. Maybe its the fact we were "young". Even in my most heated moments and all the let downs I went through I did NOT say a single bad thing about him to anyone.

Nobody knows the amount of nights I stayed up crying in his face, nobody knows about the threats I received, as if I was the one to leave him? Nobody knows about how he insults me in front of others, nobody knows how horrible my anxiety was in a way he does and yet he did everything to make it worse. Nobody knows the amounts of things I excused but couldn't get the same in the return.

All of this hurts not bc he did this to me but bc I wouldn't have ever in my ENTIRE life take this disrespect from anyone but yet I let him. That's what I've not gotten over to this very day. I'm not saying I was a saint I made mistakes too but the only difference was that I learned.

And we tried a whole year after our relationship to be good friends and keep everything aside. It didn't work it was the same hellhole the same trash talking and just overall complete negative environment from which I've developed the worst anger issues. It was still me letting him control me ..always going through my phone with or without my knowledge, always telling me how horrible all the guys I talk to are and whereas I wasn't even allowed to know his phones passcode. I found out certain things tho but I couldn't tell anyone and had to keep it to myself and that was just me being in denial.

We tried a lot to be friends but all he did was continuously apologise and go ahead and the do exact same things he promised he wouldn't and he lies constantly ...its like he looks at me thinks wow shes so stupid I can keep going on this way. He intentionally does everything to hurt me and his excuse being "anger". We had the same fights over and over and OVER to point it got mentally and physically EXHAUSTING. And to this very day I can guarantee u he definitely speaks a whole lotta crap about me.

Our relationship ended horribly and so did our friendship all for the same reasons tho. It didn't matter. Cause change cannot be all on one person. I'm not saying all these are the only reasons there's a lot that contributed to this too my college life put me in a horrible place and his insecurities took over him.

I'm only ranting SO MUCH bc I'm honestly fucking tired of hearing this, yes he was a HUGE part of my life and IVE PRAYED COUNTLESS TIMES THAT THINGS WERE BETTER BETWEEN US...but it isn't and I dont know if itll ever be. I've lost all my trust bc for the past three years it was lies, lies and MORE lies. And tumblr is just this completely emotional and personal place (safe place)for me that I feel okay w saying this and bc I cannot feel this okay-ness of saying all this anywhere else.

Theres wayyyy more to this than anybody can ever imagine and I wouldn't wish this upon anyone. Theres my story and also his. This wont be his truth but it is mine.

One day I hope I'll be able to put all of this behind. I want too but the damage is far more than done.

(Also I hate that I said sm, sorry bye 😂)

[rabblerauser]

Hey man. As somebody who chased internet popularity for a good few years now, and briefly achieved it in some circles of the net, trying to get popular will give you complete brain rot. Absolutely share your stuff, and it's fulfilling and great to get notes- don't ever stop working for recognition. But as soon as you dedicate yourself to a fandom or subject for the fame and cater too much it becomes soul sucking FAST.

Not to be a downer of course. I guess what I'm saying is, be dedicated to improving and expanding, but draw what YOU want to draw. You don't have to tie yourself down. I can't guarantee that you'll get as much recognition as quickly, but it also won't fade nearly as fast, and you'll be much more content getting recognition because you deserve it rather than catering to someone. Have a good day!

--

that is EXTREMELY valid....i can totally understand that. maybe i should have thought of that, having run a few fandom dedicated blogs in the past it is super tiring... thank you for these really, i appreciate your advice! yeah it might be a longer road, but true, itll be more fun and better in the long run.

[wurmeatworld]

Arguments ppl use to keep others from killing themselves that I hate.

1. “But this person has it worse than u and theyre still smiling!” God I hate this one the most. How do you know they have it worse? I smile too sometimes, it doesnt mean jack shit. And if they are happy? If theyve found true contentment and joy in their life? How the hell are they worse off than I am?

2. “Youll hurt your loved ones!” Ok this one works, up to a point. But once youre past that point you get so sick of hearing it. I really hate that its the go-to argument ppl use. Before you start guilt tripping a suicidal person, maybe try being compassionate instead? Youre just making things more painful for them. I guarantee it.

Maybe instead of making suicidal people feel like shit by focussing on how OTHERS feel, maybe we should be focussing on how THE SUICIDAL PEOPLE feel. You know what keeps me going? The things I enjoy. The things I have yet to experience. The kind things people have said to me. The hope that itll get better someday.

Not guilt trippy bs.

[fearsbellsarchived]

[me? Thinking about a gf fairytales au instead of being productive? More likely than u think!!! think ou.at buT BETTER and w/o the real world dimension hopping part. under the cut bc i just copy/pasted my tags from forever ago to put them in one place

mabel and dipper are hansel and gretal

paz is sleeping beauty 

bill is maleficient 

if we’re gonna get disney about it wendy as merida 

i LOVE the idea of tambry as rapunzel??? 

mabel can also be like...eric from the little mermaid 

so mermando can be ariel 

gIDEON AS URSULA/VANESSA IN THAT VEIN THO 

bill is also rumplestilskin 

stan can be the huntsman (idk from which story cause theres a fEW BUT)

ford is the sorcerer from fanstasia 

ford is teaching dipper magic....and instead of a true love’s kiss that’s how he wakes paz (maybe?)

the northwests made a deal w bill like in the most famous version of rumplestilskin but instead of wanting paz for himself he just wanted to steal her body at 16

so when they lose the deal they ask for help from ford and ford’s like “yo i can maybe change the deal??? a little bit???” so instead of bill taking her over when he goes to she falls asleep ​

so dipper wasnt supposed to wake her up but he found her and fords notes and he and mabel went on an adventure

bill is all the villains 

billains 

so stan has to leave mabel and dipper in the woods (idk y it wasnt for long the twins are just impatient) so stan disappears and the twins are like “lETS EXPLORE THE WOODS”

they come across some creepy old house w a lot of spiderwebs (can u guess the villain yet?)

an older woman comes out and is like “why are you guys lost in the forest?”

mabel points to the glitter trail “we’re not lost”

dipper looks behind them ‘mabel!!! where’s all the glitter?!”

(ACTUALLY MAYBE ITS YARN???) 

so they lose the trail 

meanwhile stan is losing his fucking mind

he follows the stray glitter but it’s blown all over

he feels “LOST IN THE WOOOOODDDS!!!”

so the old lady offers for them to stay the night bc its getting late

dipper is SUPER sus but he plays it cool surprisingly

mabel is So In!

long short...stan eventually saves them from darlene’s trap

usually shes just a maneater but look

when u live in the woods u do what u can

so stan hauls them back to their cottage

dipper knew there was weird shit out there but he wants MORE

he starts going through his great-uncle’s journals (*cue the dipper squee*)

he reads about bill and his deal w paz’s parents

he’s like....’maybe we should rescue her?’

ford wont tell him why they cant

so dipper and mabel sneak out

they steal the grunkles’ boat

mabel falls over board???

dipper tries like HELL to save her

but then he sees mermando save her

SO MABEL IS SAVED BY MERMANDO!!! 

gideon (who had long-loved mabel from afar) finds out

he visits the merman to trick him

all mabel remembers is his voice

so YES mermando trades his voice for legs just like the movie

sue me okay w his distinct accent it makes sense!!!

so the twins get sidetracked bc mermando shows up out of nowhere

they dock on a small island for a pit stop and thats when ‘kiss the girl’ happens

they dont kiss so they move on

they dock on another stretch of land the next day

AND GIDEON APPEARS

the twins have only heard about him from their grunkles so mabel hears his voice and goes *heart eyes*

mermando is Distressed

dipper is Focused on getting to this sleeping princess

mabel makes fun of him for liking her

SO GIDEON HAS MERMANDOS VOICE!

at one point dipper catches him w/o the amulet that makes him sound like mermando

and he tells mabel and its kinda like “the hand that rocks the mabel” or whatever the ep was called

it takes dipper and mermando being threatened (and gideons voice slipping) for her to catch on and she breaks up w him

dipper wants to throw him overboard

they just leave him on the next inhabited island they find

mermando got his kiss but decides to go back to the ocean anyway

he promises to write

mabel is Sad

SO BACK TO OUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED ADVENTURE!

the twins come across a land near the one paz is on and decide to stop for food and to stretch their legs and other hygiene things

they find out there’s some archery thing going on and mabel is like ’ooooh can we try?!’

turns out its for neighboring kingdoms’ princes to win a princess

mabel and dipper think this is RIDICULOUS so they crash it

mabel steps up to shoot and everyone’s like ‘wHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?’

then dipper steps up beside her. neither of them have shot a bow before

they shoot at the same time. mabel’s like thisclose to the bullseye. dippers too far right

THEN!!! PRINCESS WENDY COMES OUT OF NOWHERE

DIPPER AND MABEL ARE IN AWE OF THIS VALKYRIE. THEYRE BOTH READY FOR HER TO KILL THEM BC THEY THINK ITLL BE AWESOME

but wendy is like ‘ACTUALLY ILL SHOOT FOR MYSELF THANKS’ and splits like three arrows down the middle w her accuracy

she looks at mabel and dipper and is like ‘u dudes look fun! ive never seen u before who are u???’

and they’re like ‘WELL!’ and launch into detail about their adventure w overlapping voices and sound affects and VAST description

anyways. i cant decide how old people are rn okay 

so wendy is like “hey dad??? im going on an adventure w these guys!” and her dad is like “unusual but u DID just win ur own hand. so ill allow it”

“YES! can i take soos too?!” 

“sure!”

sO THEYRE OFF AGAIN!!! lemme tell u the ship is filling faST!!!

they get to paz’s land. and the first thing they find is a girl in a tower with long purple hair.

everyone is pretty much just making ‘wtf’ faces for like....ten minutes.

finally wendy calls up the tower like “YO! WHATS W ALL THE HAIR?!”

tambry leans out the window w a bored expression and goes “its mine. im tambry. who r u?”

they introduce themselves and are like “u wanna come on our adventure?”

then....ROBBIE APPEARS!

and he knows where the princess is!!!

”oh yeah. her. shes also in a tower. its got a door but its guarded by gnomes.”

then robbie climbs tambrys hair pecks her cheek and ducks in the tower

they decide to head for the tower robbie directed them to. but they have to pass the castle. Northwest Castle

robbie warned them about the northwests. said that the princess was one and before she disappeared she was the snottiest brat hed ever met

so they became friends despite the fact that he plays music for a living (and not very well either)

her parents told her of the spell when she was twelve

so robbie’s like “they are not nice people and neither was she??? most of the townsfolk are glad shes asleep tbh”

but dammit! dipper came here for an adventure!!! he wasnt going to stop just bc the princess wasnt what he expected!

so they continue on!

mabel is like “maybe she doesnt KNOW how to be nice!”

and soos is just excited to be there!

and wendy is just...u kno...chill

they start to get close to the castle and they feel like they’re being watched

and then soos notices the PEACOCKS!

they assume theyre spies for the king and queen. which is half true?

they can also warn bill if someone is near pacifica

oh damn imagine that

being stuck asleep w a DREAM DEMON in ur head

sorry for the accidental psychological torture paz

WHICH IS THE ONLY TORTURE SHES HAD!

i think to make up for risking her life as a baby ther parents were like “we’re just gonna spoil u rotten and PRETEND u do no wrong eVERYTHING IS FINE”

so dipper is reading the journal and he FINALLY gets to the true loves kiss part of the deal

and he looks around at the party like “oh shit true love what do we do???”

mabel suggests he at least try and everyone agrees that yeah okay thats the back up plan

but dipper wants to use a SPELL!!!

so the king and queen see him w the journal and remember ford having the same one

so everyone is brought to the king and queen

theyre like “pRINCESS GWENDOLYN?!”

bc this is MY STORY and if i wanna give wendy a more princess-y name thEN I WILL

i say as i continue to refer to mason as DIPPER!!!

SO THEYRE MEETING THE NORTHWESTS!!!

wendys like “yes that is me the princess” and then everyone else introduces themselves...w dipper introducing himself as mason bc it just sounds more fairytale-y

soos is jesus (hey zeus! not jee sus)

soos is like....wendys bff/personal servant but mostly bff

so they explain their adventure to the northwests as quickly as possible

preston is no patient man and he’s is like “tbh its probably important she be here for her 18th bday soooo??? as long as she wakes up by next year why not???”

but only bc dipper was like “i wANNA USE MAGIC I DONT WANNA KISS HER THATS PLAN B!!!”

plus u kno...even if he DOES whats the guarantee itll work???

the guarantee is me being a filthy shipper tHATS WHAT!!!

so they continue to the tower!

there is probably a sidequest thingy with giffany bc i liked that episode

also soos needs more screentime im sorry

SO THEN!!! FINALLY!!!! THEY MAKE IT TO THE TOWER!!!

WHICH IS!!!

IN FACT!!!

GUARDED

BY

GNOMES!]

also theres a manotaur/multi-bear sidequest i just thought of bc i like THAT episode!!!

is this gf, a fairytale, sk.yrim, or a d.n.d campaign now??? WHO KNOWS!!! ITS NOT ME!!!

SO THEY GOTTA GET PAST THE GNOMES!

first they offer safe passage in exchange for mabel as their queen

after thats declined theyre like “or the redhead. well take her!”

this is also declined

finally jeff tells them to attack

at first the party tries to fight them off and they do okay

uNTIL SOME GNOME WEAPONIZED SCHMEBULOCKS RAINBOW PUKE!!! (i think it’s toxic tbh but i dONT REMEMBER)

finally mabel just pulls out her trusty crosSbow (aka “GRAPPLING HOOK!���) and they just make a tightrope to the window above the door

wendy goes first and NAILS it

then everyone else follows

soos almost falls and gets left to the gnomes but everyone helps him balance and they all make it through the window

coincidentally. the window leads to the princess’s room

OH MAN WHY DIDNT I USE THE PTERODACTYL?!

oh well. anyways.

everyone is looking around the room and like...taking it all in

dipper takes a moment...then walks over to the princess

he isnt sure if waking her will also wake the demon

crossover even more w my old paciphera au??? idk probably not

so dipper tries the spells he narrowed it down to

none of them work

all his friends have returned to the princess’s room and mabel is like “u gotta kiss her brobro!”

so dipper...poor poor dipper...just leans forward and kisses her

paz pretty much snaps her eyes open when dipper is a half inch from her face while he’s pulling back 

and even tho she was forewarned she wasnt expecting DIPPER so she SCREAMS

dippers ears are ringing

she shuts her eyes and stills her breathing and sits up.

AND SEES EVERYONE ELSE AND SCREAMS AGAIN

“i dIDNT EXPECT U TO BRING *FRIENDS*!”

so once shes a little more calm they explain the whole adventure to her

paz feels a little honored they came all this way just for her

also since True Love beats everything bill is like.....back in his home dimension. also paz has been fighting him for like....over a year.

so paz is like....ready to Go. u kno. just wants to go HOME.

they get pazs shit together and exit the tower through the door

she says goodbye to the gnomes. all by name.

“oh yeah mom and dad made them my personal guard when i was like...eight. theyve been prepping for this my whole life. they’ll meet me back at the castle.” so then she starts telling them about herself and her last like 

two years of being asleep w a DREAM DEMON

“sometimes i got the weirdest nightmares??? and they never ended. but when i woke up i couldnt remember anything specific.”

she and dipper talk away from the group. he tells her about how hes her true love and everything “okay well. we’ll have to lie to my parents and say it was a spell. bc they will NOT approve of us being true loves and if they hurt you...”

“then they hurt *you* too!” dipper finishes (idk maybe a combo w a soulmate au thing?)

meanwhile mabel is like...whining about boy problems??? and wendy is like “this is y boys r dumb.”

soos is like...wandering off. I WANNA INCORPORATE MELODY BUT WHO SHOULD SHE BE?!

paz and dipper start like....arguing about how to deal w her parents

apparently they actually ARENT that nice. if she doesnt marry a prince they’ll give her over to bill completely...or something idk

SO theyre nearing the castle!!!

theyve written theyre grunkles okay no worries. also mermando.

thats y mabels complaing about boys.

mermando and that manatee wife of his!!!

paz is not exactly ready to face her parents so she convinces the party (roll for charisma) to go the long way

which is actually just circles

anyways

we run back in to melody and soos and the party is like ‘wHOOPS WE DIDNT EVEN NOTICE GLAD U DIDNT GET EATEN BY A SPIDER LADY!

maybe melody is like....a fairy???

something light and ‘childish’ bc thatd fit her personality

soos is like “ive BEEN here. u dudes have been going in circles.” and everyone glares at paz.

“im sorry!!! i just dont want to go back!!!”

“ur dad made us promise to have u back for ur 18th bday.” says dipper while he tries to stay mad at his future wife

paz is like “YEAH SO HE CAN MARRY ME OFF TO A PRINCE!!!”

idk why paz and dips are being better at being soulmates here okay i was like....sleep-drunk when i first wrote this

so the party has a choice to make.

take paz back home where she wont be able to be w her TL (which in some cases has probably led to death) OR!!!

sneak her out and take her home w them?!

wendys probably gotta go back to her own kingdom tho.

and soos wants to stay w melody

U KNOW WHAT I JUST REALIZED?!

sTAN NEVER GOT TO BE SOOS’S DAD!!!!

SORRY SOOS!!!

so anyways

mabel and dipper decide to help her sneak out

luckily she knows all the blindspots

it takes longer but they finally make it back to their ship

they say theyre goodbyes to soos and melody and paz wishes them well in her kingdom. she promises to return when shes ready to rule

they load the ship and sail to wendys kingdom next

they stay a few days to recuperate

paz has trouble sleeping bc when she does the nightmares come back.

cue a kat.niss/pee.ta thing where paz sleeps next to dips bc it keeps the nightmares away

wendy has to explain why soos isnt w them to her dad who kinda shrugs it off?

“u proved u can protect urself.” or something.

after like.....a whole fucking year the twins are heading home.

paz and dipper sleep together on the ship too bc its just fucking easier

paz is nervous to meet the grunks

she and dipper arent exactly....dating??? its def more like soulmate au

where theyre AWARE theyre supposed to be together but they dont even rly know if they WANT to be together.

paz is p much “i dont rly wanna be w anyone else. ill let u kno if that changes.” and dips is like “tbh same.”

mabel is already planning a big royal wedding.

iDK Y BUT I WANT THEM TO FIND OUT THEYVE BEEN ROYALTY ALL THIS TIME??? probably just bc i LOVE that trope!!! but theyre not so its whateves.

so they FINALLY get home. mabel has been writing letters this whole time. to mermanso. to soos and melody. to wendy.

shes the captain of the dip.ifica ship and shes gotta keep her crewmembers in the know!!!

the twins also wrote to the grunks the whole time so!!!! no worries!!!

paz tries writing to her parents...but she can never find the right words.

meeting the grunks isnt as bad as she thought???

stan loves her off the bat. partially bc shes rich and bc she doesnt take shit

ford is pleased to meet the girl he saved and shes v v thankful to him for saving her life as best he could.

it takes her like a YEAR to write the letter.

she promises her parents she’ll return. AFTER shes married.

at this point she and dipper ARE together. they figured all theyre confusion out and are just living the good life!

mabel and wendy are doing the long distance thing. shes still friends w mermando.

robbie and tambry found paz and they write back and forth.

u CAN TAKE ROBBIE AND PAZ SIBLINGS FROM MY DECOMPOSING HANDS!!!

everything is as happily ever after as it can get.

and then dipper proposes despite knowing what it means.

BUT THATS A WHOLE OTHER ADVENTURE!!!!

*end credits roll. an epic theme song starts playing*

[torturedwarrior]

My fears and how I vanquished them!!!!

Driving can be a good or a bad thing. What actually is scary about them? Even though If you have a car and don't mind driving it around, then you're well on your way to earning hundreds of dollars on the side every month., Driving is scary and working is very stressful because when work stress becomes chronic, it can be overwhelming — and harmful to both physical and emotional health. Unfortunately, such long-term stress is all too common. and I wont be able to control the car I may cause an accident. If you have a car and don't mind driving it around, then you're well on your way to earning hundreds of dollars on the side every month. One great thing about Door Dash: you are guaranteed a minimum of $10 per hour even if business is slow enough that you wouldn't otherwise make that! Average pay is anywhere from $10 to $20, and up to $25 per hour. Plus, as a consumer, Door Dash is my current favorite food delivery service. If you're a college student you might try Tapingo, which focuses on campus delivery. Otherwise your options are pretty much legion! Another example is, you can use your own car to be a courier for Amazon using Amazon Flex. You can make $18 to $25 an hour. Like with many delivery services, you schedule a block of availability. Then you pick packages up from an Amazon warehouse and the app gives you directions for delivering them. Even though If you have a car and don't mind driving it around, then you're well on your way to earning hundreds of dollars on the side every month., Driving is scary and working is very stressful because when work stress becomes chronic, it can be overwhelming — and harmful to both physical and emotional health. Unfortunately, such long-term stress is all too common...an example is, Certain factors tend to go hand-in-hand with work-related stress. Some common workplace stressors are: Low salaries, Excessive workloads, Few opportunities for growth or advancement, Work that isn't engaging or challenging, Lack of social support, Not having enough control over job-related decisions, Conflicting demands or unclear performance expectations. Another example can be, A stressful work environment can contribute to problems such as headache, stomachache, sleep disturbances, short temper and difficulty concentrating. Chronic stress can result in anxiety, insomnia, high blood pressure and a weakened immune system. It can also contribute to health conditions such as depression, obesity and heart disease. Compounding the problem, people who experience excessive stress often deal with it in unhealthy ways such as overeating, eating unhealthy foods, smoking cigarettes or abusing drugs and alcohol. The most important reason Driving is scary is because I wont be able to control the car, I may cause an accident. Nothing is scarier than Driving; you have to make sure to watch for other drivers and controlling this ton machine. An example can be, there is nothing scary about it. But you and (past me and) all those who dont know how to drive may have any or multiple of the following fears: I wont be able to control the car, I may cause an accident, may hit a pedestrian, may hit another car, may fall the car off a cliff if its a hilly area, I may hurt myself during the process of driving, I may not be able to park, I may not be able to take the car uphill - it will start going back, I may not be able to brake the car on a main road when required, And, worst of all - I may kill somebody. Some solutions I have tried and overcame are, Try to learn driving from a professional - a driving instructor, Try to learn driving on a small - hatch preferably – car, Try to learn driving on an auto transmission car so that you dont have to worry for changing gears, Dont worry about the dashboard of the car as there might be so many buttons and numbers - just get yourself adjusted with steering wheel, accelerator, and brakes (after these of course you will have to know how to give indicators and use rain-wipers), Once youre well-familiar with the above things, ask your instructor to take you to an area where there are less cars and less people, Practice there, Practice daily, Practice in different conditions - rain, night, day, MOST important: Tell yourself that you can do it. Its not a rocket science. Believe me after a few lessons itll become your habit. ALWAYS STAY CONFIDENT AND POSITIVE And, NEVER EVER TRY TO OVERSPEED. And follow all other rules REMEMBER: so many bad things can happen anywhere - while youre on the road walking, or in a train, or in a car with someone else driving, or anywhere but they dont always happen! Youve to be positive! Another example is Breathing when you are driving and when a panic attack comes on do breathing and grounding techniques to stay calm. So, it is clear that although If you have a car and don't mind driving it around, then you're well on your way to earning hundreds of dollars on the side every month., Driving is scary, and working is very stressful for two main reasons. First, when work stress becomes chronic, it can be overwhelming — and harmful to both physical and emotional health. Unfortunately, such long-term stress is all too common... But most importantly, I wont be able to control the car I may cause an accident. When you think you cannot do work because it is stressful try tracking your stressors like keeping a journal, develop healthy responses instead of alcohol try making good choices, take time to recharge like on your off days try and take a relaxing bubble bath, talk to your supervisor and letting him/her know it is to stressful and you might need something less, and get support from family and friends. Work Cited: "Coping with Stress at Work." American Psychological Association (APA). 2019. Web. 27 Jul 2019. . Farrington, Robert. "10 Interesting Ways You Can Make Money Driving." The College Investor | Millennial Personal Finance and Investing Blog. 23 May 2019. Web. 27 Jul 2019. . "Is driving scary? What exactly is scary about it? - Quora." Quora - A place to share knowledge and better understand the world. Web. 27 Jul 2019. . "Working is stressful - Google Search." Google. Web. 27 Jul 2019. .

[dulciscoeur]

Not to sound cheesy or anything but literally all i want is for everyone to treat each other better. To find those whose smile isn’t as bright as it used to be and do something about it, even the smallest gesture that would make a huge difference. To offer flowers, compliments and smiles to friends and strangers. And to do so freely, without thinking about it or feeling embarrassed, making an habit out of it. Imagine how much warmer the world would be if we said every positive thing that’s on our minds about other people, without having to shut those thoughts down because we may come off as weird, flirty, too-outspoken or whatever. Like hell yeah I like your skin, and I’m gonna say it. Oh, guess what, I’m fascinated by your brilliant mind and I’m not sorry for voicing that opinion. That hairstyle of yours that took all morning to finish? It’s killing it! New shirt? I’m in love. You have such pretty eyes, and you, your hair is the softest thing I’ve ever seen. !!! It ain’t that hard but why are we sooo shy when it comes to actually saying the things we like about other people with honesty? Why don’t we normalize that behaviour instead of keeping it to ourselves? I sure as hell want to know whether someone like my dress, my hands or the way I think. As long as you express those opinions with respect, then what’s there to lose? I may not know the woman that bumped into me on the train, but I like her purse so why not say it? It’ll put a smile to her face, and mine. For free. 

[transgenderteensurvivalguide]

I'm ftm (pre everything) and am in choir but I also want to sing and maybe pursue it later but if I go on hormones then I'm afraid I won’t be able to. Advice?

Lee says:

I like singing, how will T affect my voice?

We can’t tell you what will happen to your voice- people tend to be able to sing well (once their voice is done changing!) if they could sing well before, but there are instances of people losing their singing voices.

We’ve anecdotally heard of some people on T being able to keep their high notes, but it’s much more likely that you lose your high notes as your vocal cords thicken. 

T will most likely deepen your voice so your range will change, but as long as you continue to practice and don’t overwork your voice into notes you cannot reach anymore your singing voice probably will be okay- different, but okay.

But we can’t guarantee this, and it’s your decision whether testosterone and passing/being comfortable in your body are worth the risks of losing your singing voice for you.

This post has a bit more on singing

The Changing Female-To-Male (FTM) Voice

The Changing Female-To-Male (FTM) Voice Pedagogical Notes 

Testosterone And The Trans Male Singing Voice

Training the Transgender Singer: Finding the Voice Inside

Followers, any examples of trans singers on T for us to add? Or any personal experiences to add on?Followers, any personal experiences to add?

Followers say:

aeolianchemistry said: have a lot to say about this! i may not be the most coherent bc im half asleep lol, but anyone feel free to message me about this anytime and ask for more details!,

this was my biggest Thing when i was deciding to pursue hrt. ive been in various choirs for years, and its a very Important part of my life. but also my voice was my #1 source of dysphoria, and the #1 thing i needed to change. i searched for weeks to find anything about what to expect from hrt as a singer, esp bc ive heard stories of trans ppl losing their siging voice entirely. i was terrified, and couldnt find resources to shed any significant light on the topic.

and so, in no particular order bc im half asleep, here are some things to expect and things that i’ve experienced so far (almost six months on hrt):

- practice while your voice is dropping! feel it out every step of the way. get to know your voice while it’s changing, and try to maintain those high notes. i didnt do a v good job of this and my high range kinda just shriveled up. i cant be sure that it wouldve been hugely different if id practiced more, but ive heard it does help

- yoir voice will feel different. unfamiliar at times. you wont be using it the same way youre used to. technique will change, placement will change

- my speaking voice shifted downward after just a month or two (i had mild hyperandrogynism before, so this wont be as quick for everyone), before my singing voice did. i didn’t start getting new low range until later, but within my pre-t vocal range, my voice just sat a bit lower than it used to. my low alto filled out more. than i started getting new notes, slowly

- there will be periods of time where it cracks or breaks or is unreliable. dont push it, but dont despair either. keep practicing as well as you can

- my voice is somewhat fragile. if i yell (which i can only somewhat do currently) or push it or force it thru cracks/breaks/weak spots, it will get tired easily and take quite a while to recover. be nice to your voice. dont push high notes if they cause strain. dont push the low notes either, even tho im sure youre excited about them

- your voice will be weak while it’s shifting. this can cause frustration and anxiety. i’m two months into my choir season singing w two and a half choirs, and i’m dealing w lots of Complicated Feelings bc my voice just cant do all the things i want it to. i cant project much, and i certainly dont have the strength (yet) to audition for any of the solos i’d like to. Patience

- the Weird Spots and the Weak Spots will continue to shift around. i have this one area in the middle of my range (currently its about Ab3-B3, but a few weeks ago it was B3-C4) where its weird and weak and its kind of like a break in register but also a bit like a black hole, bc i Cannot Project there and theres no good placement for singing those notes, and notes in the vicinity of those are also Weird but Less So. it’s slowly sliding downwards, and i am learning to navigate it better. i’m hoping it will settle and go away soon, but we’ll see

- breath support is v important. as mentioned, your voice may be quite fragile, and putting strain on it could cause it to glitch out on you for a while. supporting your voice w lots of breath will put less demand on your vocal chords

- NEVER SING IN A BINDER or compressive garment. you need those lungs!

- you’re going to miss out on some of the nostalgic singalongs of old choir songs, bc you no longer have the range to sing your old parts. this is possibly the #1 consequence of transitioning that im the most sad about lol

- i have a very weird quality to my high range rn. it seems to be caught midway between the head voice it used to be and future falsetto or whatever it’s moving toward. for now its just Strange to listen to

the current state of my voice is this:

low range is down to almost the bottom of the bass clef. i can sing down to Bb2, A2 on a good day.

from there up to F3ish is quite comfy and possibly the strongest part of my singing voice, but i do find that if i spend too much time down there it can strain the rest of my range (i used to have this problem before too: if i sang in my low alto range too much or too enthusiastically, my sop range would get tired).

from G3-C4, it’s Awkward. the Awkwardness shifts around, and some parts of it can be more comfy than others sometimes, but it’s all v inconsistent. i cant project much here, and placement is veryvery Weird.

D4-F4ish is typically comfy but has a bit of that Strange quality to it. these notes are a bit floaty, but not bad.

G4-B4 are unreliable. somedays i can get up there. some days it’ll blink out or crack or break or just Not Be There. i am predicting that once my high range settles into a proper falsetto, i’ll be able to work on this range more and it’ll have less of that Strange quality to it, but only time will tell

again, apologies for being Scattered, it’s 1am and ive had a long day. any of yall are welcome to message me for more details ☺

there is a lot of weirdness and weakness and Awkward in the transition period. but while i’m frustrated at times, i’m not worried. everything i’m dealing w is temporary. now i can’t be 100% sure how my voice will settle or when, but i’m not afraid i’ve lost it forever. as far as i’ve heard, the stories of trans ppl who lose their singing voice on t are very rare cases. youre going to go through weeks or months where singing is Weird in constantly shifting ways, but itll keep on moving and developing, and personally i’m so excited to see where it goes.

i’m currently singing tenor2 in my choirs, and occasionally i get to take a trip down and sing baritone. im not even 6months in! that has transformed my choir experience to be even better than before, even w all the awkwardness. it was so weird and beginning to get verg uncomfy to be in a place like choir, which is so important to me, which i love dearly, which has had a significant impact on my life, but which revolved around the use of my one most dysphoric feature. but now i don’t have to worry about that. now i can sing the parts i’ve been wanting to sing for years.

i do occasionally miss some of my old voice. i miss soaring soprano lines, i miss all the old alto parts in songs i used to know. i miss the confidence and strength of a familiar, complete voice. and im allowed to miss those, i dont feel bad about having that longing or sadness, bc i have zero regrets. i also occasionally miss playing with and styling my super long hair, but in five years i have not once regretted cutting it all off. i own those memories and that nostalgia, but i keep moving forward to new and better things

pinesboi said: If you keep working at your voice and take lessons to make sure you never let it get out of practice, everything should be okay. I’m on T now about 3-4 months, and I’m still singing high tenor musical theatre

[write-this-shit]

Thoughts on CM season finale *spoiler alert*

Okay first of all:

But yeah, now I’ve had some time to process that whole episode I have some opinions. JJ’s confession was a major mistake on the writers behalf, that I can agree on that. Whether or not the writers have jumped the shark with it, idk.

The start was great, I love the quirky fun times that the BAU have to break up from what can be a dark and brutal show at times. Also, did Luke swear or did I imagine that? because I replayed it three times and couldn’t tell and there was no closer captions. But I wish the episode had more focus on the team being all happy and whatnot, but since it’s the finale they of course needed that spicy drama to get viewers up.

As for the whole JJ/Ried hostage situation, it was intense situation with lazy writing which made for a tacked on ending. In one sense, the unsub wasn’t going to believe a thing JJ or Ried said and that was pretty clear from the get-go. She literally admitted to losing a child and the unsub shoved her to the ground! I get the feeling JJ thought she was about to die regardless of what was said. Admitting to Spencer she ‘loved’ was clearly there for shock value and drama in an attempt to keep interest. I’m kinda glad she didn’t answer the truth of the question, because there’s a whole lot the show has to unpack with that. But at least it’s only between Spencer and JJ as far as we know, because this whole scene would have been worse if it was done in front the whole team. Or god forbid, Will heard. So there’s no guarantee they’ll actually act on this whole nonsense, although they’re trying their best to suggest itll happen. There’s so many god. damn. blurred. lines. here!

This whole JJ/Ried thing is random, and could have worked better if JJ wasn’t in an established relationship already. Or hell, even if she’d flat out said “I love you like a brother” or some shit. They work well as friends and don’t need this forced het relationship now because the show is ending. It was heavily foreshadowed that JJ can fool Ried with a good lie so they clearly could have done something with it, and it would have been less awkward than not answering. I know love is complicated and the show is coming to an end so they’re trying to stir things up, but jfc. That being said, I’m not going to stop watching because this is my emotional support crime show, and I’d rather see things played out further and give them benefit of the doubt. Considering the backlash, I’d hope the writers fix things. I will literally not complain if they delayed the final season to fix it at this rate.

[sontwine88]

Residence Improvement South East London.

Do I Need An Architect For An Expansion?

Content

Just How The Property Restoration And Refurbishment Providers In London Work.

Rj Repair Services.

Beginning Your Task.

Tiny Orangery Conservatories As Well As Glass Conservatories.

Allow The Sunlight In! Everything You Wished To Know About Sunrooms

I know this is a late posting, but in trying numerous high quality develops, one I'm currently making use of htat is rather intriguing is the NR/quality. The reality that this tool is offered rather early in the game, paired with the large damage it can handle every hit, makes it one of the very best tools in Dark Souls by a nation mile. In fact, the only tool that is probably far better than the Zweihander is another preferred greatsword. The Longsword is quickly among the most trustworthy weapons in Dark Soulsand a fantastic tool for any individual seeking a Quality develop.

Exactly How The Property Restoration As Well As Repair Services In London Work.

So what I need to be asking is whether or not making a high quality develop is viable or if locating a tool I such as, infusng it and alloting points as necessary is the method to go. The most effective means to raise your damages is to focus on one stat that scales one of the most with your weapon. If you are a Ninjyutu individual as well as want to level up successfully, Kusarigama is the perfect tool kind.

It is also the only stat that boosts your natural damages. The very first soft cap goes to 25, after which the returns lessen up until the 2nd soft cap at 50. Not all spears make good high quality tools as far as I'm worried.

Rj Refurbishment Solutions.

It has a frostbite quality, which slows endurance regrowth for foes, in addition to high damage scaling on each upgrade. The only issue with it is that it calls for Twinkling Titanite to upgrade, which is an unusual upgrade product. Even then, it'll scale to 200+ damage quicker than your Broadsword, and its frostbite feature is a cool perk.

All round outstanding expert solution, we are really completely satisfied clients; highly advised undoubtedly. Qualitybuild have just recently completed a spectacular, large downstairs bathroom consisting of shower, wc. Simon as well as his team have the highest possible standards, take pride in their job as well as pay very close attention to the tiniest information. He wants designing as well as drawing what the consumer wants, as well as has the experience to make sound recommendations to address any difficulties.

Can a sunroom be built on a deck?

Building a sunroom on an existing deck is often a great idea because if the deck's framing and foundation meet the current building code usually the homeowner can save up to 35% and the project can be completed in less time. The foundation can be piers, footers or similar.

Begin Your Project.

completely pleased with the work they did the ended up work looks fantastic. As the job was all completed to a high typical i have asked him to do some more job and also i would gladly suggest him. From the area of our advancements, to the layout of the residences to the materials selected, we guarantee that our remarkable attention to information goes to the center of our quality construct procedures. Quality Build Shrewsbury were acquired to make as well as build a Garden Room and also landscape our very high grass. The Yard Space was well intended and also implemented to a high quality.

Because most tools can be instilled with tailored stat bonus offers, in most cases all that matters is including enough of a tertiary stat to be able to make use of a weapon, and after that pumping stats right into the primary incentive stat. also at 150 in bloodarena with all the tryhards, high quality develop still sensible if you make the most of tool button. Instilled and also buffed tools are normally stronger for the time of the buff. Infusing physical STR or DEX weapons generally kills the scaling, no matter what the scaling-letter states. I came across quite a few to warrant additional investigation, as well as have not truly discovered much that was existing, and even from SOTFS.

Tiny Orangery Conservatories And Also Glass Conservatories.

If adhering to a Stamina construct, remain to go for the complying with stats by heart degree 50. Presuming you're choosing a Stamina develop, you may intend to aim for the following statistics. Keep in mind that Toughness as well as Dexterity are highlighted in red to denote that it's your selection as to how many factors you place in these two stats relying on what weapon and also bonuses you're aiming for.

What's the average cost of a single story extension?

https://sexfather20.wordpress.com/2020/10/29/pulte-homes-agrees-to-acquire/ per m2 for an extension outside of London is between £1,200-£1,500. In London and the South East, the average cost per m2 is around £1,500-£2,000+. For two-storey extensions, add 50% to the cost of a single-storey extension. If you want to add a bathroom or kitchen, add £5,000-£10,000.

How you spend your statistics depends greatly on which weapons you wish to make use of. You might favor Strength weapons, like the Butcher's Knife, or perhaps Quality based tools that include both Stamina and Mastery into their base bonuses, like the Sellsword Twinblades.

How do you calculate glazing area?

The glazed area for each zone in your model is calculated. This is the total area of planes that are tagged as glazing in your 3D model and that are external glazing. In the example above: 1. Floor area = 20m2. 2. Total window free area = 2 windows @0.6m2 each = 1.2m2. 3. Free Area for room = 1.2m2 / 20m2 = 6%

The tool is quick sufficient to land 2 hits and afterwards roll away from any kind of threat, leaving the adversary without any hint as to what happened. It's one of one of the most cherished weapons in the whole game, and also it's simple to see why this holds true. When crafting a Quality build for Dark Hearts, it is essential to get ready with only the best weapons to suit a gamer's staminas and skills. Visceral damages ranges off your Skl stat, the gems slotted within your tool, and your level. Purchasing this stat will enable you to major fast, light tools.

When an issue came up, Nathan would certainly offer it with prospective remedies to select from. Fantastic versatility with our stop/start task as well as was extremely fitting of our random demands.

It is recommended to maintain this stat over 50 as weapons are made use of invariantly in the video game. In-game your personality has a variety of statistics differing from Arcane to Stamina. And as you progress in the game, defeating all enemies and also finish the projects and also objective, you level up which permits you to level up the stats. Towards the end of your time in Undead Negotiation you will be given a Irithyll Straight Sword after killing an Outrider Knight. This weapon is extremely effective, resembles the Lengthy Sword, and also can last you the entire video game if you take pleasure in the fast attacks of straight swords.

Take a virtual tour, tailor your house throughout, or obtain inspired by our picture galleries.

Mostly all services happen in the client's home or the neighborhood w here the problems are taking place and, eventually, where they need to be dealt with.

HOMEBUILDERS ® therapists deal with risky households involved with the youngster protective services system.

Kid safety and security is made certain through small caseloads, program intensity, and 24-hour a day solution schedule.

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contrasted to various other statistics, so it's finest to level up Body and Heart to 10 overlooking your tool of selection. We used Nathan for a tiny renovation to an existing building. Initially we liked his very easy way and also wonderful communication.

So I guess what I'm mainly asking is whether these situations are still the same? Maybe what I review was simply individuals trying to construct as optimally as feasible.

Let The Sunlight In! Whatever You Would Like To Know Concerning Sunrooms

Recently Developed Residences.

i mainly implied the tools that receive darksoulswiki under straight swords. You can go with 40 toughness 40 dex, itll offer you space for health and wellness and also endurance with alot of weapons to expirament with. i was very pleased with the job that was accomplished by top quality constructed they were very dependable very specialist and also spick-and-span.

Do sunrooms need foundations?

If you are building a sunroom from the ground up, you will want to start with a slab foundation. If the land that you want to build your sunroom on will not be able to be graded and leveled for construction, you will have to build a framed foundation using concrete or cement block walls.

When you strike around 35 to 40 Vigor, you may want to think about putting points right into Vigor to be able to bring heavier tools or armor. Having a large swimming pool of health and wellness is only completely efficient if your Estus Flask can recovery you up to complete promptly without numerous usages. So, exactly how you stabilize Vigor, Vitality, as well as Stamina from mid to late game depends partially on the amount of Estus Flask upgrades you have actually obtained. Note that heavy armors aren't as reliable as in previous games, yet do aid you mitigate damages.

[rqs902]

now im watching last week’s ep of tco4 bc i havent had time to get to it yet and i need to take my mind off snzm 

UGH its sad to hear xy, fsc and xiao huang talking about their rankings rip but their laughing makes it even more sad

UGH NOT FRUIT PLANET I REALLY LIKE THEMMMM sigh i gotta face the reality that theyre likely gonna get separated... but PLEASE AT LEAST SOMEONE SAVE XIAO ZHI PLEASE THATS ALL I ASK, im not gonna be greedy :(

oof i respect ma zhe saying that he doesnt want to win bc he recognizes other kids like FRUIT PLANET KIDS, zy and xiao zhi, are so skilled. he knows winning is just a numbers game and would not serve as proof of his skill. thats a tough place to be in, and it isnt uncommon but i think i rarely hear a contestant say it like that. “i dont want to win bc im not worthy” “i dont want to win bc i know im not as talented” 

wow i was a little confused as to why they were doing these solo spotlights but actually this is really nice! its nice to see them really going hard at their strengths and really pouring their all in to show off a bit. it can be hard to do so in a group setting all the time, and really it reminds you that there a lot of really talented musicians among these kids. i think itll also be good to remind the kids who are picking later what the other kids’ skills are and what they’re capable of. 

oh whoa i thought about there only being 2 bassists, i didnt realize there are only 2 pianists too

hm maybe im just biased but i thought xiao li’s playing was a litttleee bit cleaner than szb’s heheh but i respect that they attempted to even play a duet from across the room, thats a challenge 

i respect muji’s playing 

LOL why do xiao huang and zhao ke’s voices singing together sound so strange to me LOL 

LOL switch to ljt’s group and im just !!!!! HIS VOICE !!!! I LOVE LIAO JUNTAO’S VOICEEE and also the cafe vibe is so him LOL this group is so him

wait so someone explain to me why ljt wasnt in the solo section? is he considered a vocal? but what about his guitar skills?? 

im kinda sad jym isnt smiling when drumming anymore :\ 

YAY FRUIT PLANET !! i love how happy xiao zhi and wsh look when playing hahah 

AW talking about xiao zhi being like a dad and 包容 and taking care of them im ughhhh UGH THIS IS A MINI XIAO ZHI FEATURE IM CRYINGGGG THIS CHILD DESERVES THIS “the one who’s left standing when everyone else falls down” hes just so supportive and warm.. ugh watching him break down crying thinking about all he couldve done better and you can tell he feel so guilty and blames himself that fruit planet isnt doing well

HAHAHAHA EVERYONE WANTS XIAO ZHI !!! except szb lol but at least i know if they do get disbanded, hopefully xiao zhi will still be safe :’) im glad they all recognize his talent and the importance of having a bassist!!! 

oof xiao xiong talking about hyt being overbearing and reminding him of his ANGRY DAD thats a big ouch. it is true that xiao xiong’s skill level may not be up to hyt’s standards, but i can see hyt doesnt respect him enough as a team member. the more familiar hyt gets with him, the more he isnt afraid to show his true feelings of frustration. esp bc theyre in such a stressful situation, it must be rough as a leader. also seems rough for xiao li to be stuck in between this. from the beginning hyt has shown himself to have high standards and he demands high quality so he isnt gonna be the soft, encouraging leader xiao xiong probably would prefer, unfortunately. ouch the way hyt straight up says “this is going to be painful” like theres nothing he can do about it and they just have to accept it. like ps says, he’s not good at understanding other people’s feelings, like he doesnt seem to be willing to try to understand xiao xiong’s. 

the way hyt lists what other people are doing and then asks xiao xiong “那你呢?” ouch........ that seems really mean? manipulative? harsh? but at the same time, we dont really know all the context so this is just want tencent wants us to think.

hyt also wants xiao zhi???? I cant imagine xiao zhi in this group, even tho itd probably be good for his possible debuting prospects, but xiao zhi gives me such a laid back, warm, taking care of everyone, creating a nice, supportive environment type of leader, and this group is literally the opposite of that??? ugh and yet, despite their superior group environment, fruit planet is at risk of getting disbanded... so sad. 

man with the way these votes are trending hyt is gonna win and ljt wont debut? :(

lol tencent cutting the speeches of less popular contestants not surprised 

wait wat. isnt qiang ge very popular??? what happened to his votes? wait what. im confused. what???

LOL FRUIT PLANET IS SAFE IM SO RELIEVED HAHAH okay i know i came into this show for ljt but xiao zhi has become one of my picks too, i cant deny anymore LOL and also xiao li -- but hyt’s group’s dynamic makes me feel uncomfortable at the moment. but yea ljt, xiao zhi, xiao li are my top 3... too bad they DEF wont be in the same group / wouldnt mesh well in a group together LOL 

i love fruit planet group dynamic :’) watching them talk to each other just makes me smile

OH MY GOODNESS XIAO LI IS LEAVING?????? i can understand though, this grouping is not ideal from a music making standpoint either, like why are there so many vocalists lol but also i respect that hes putting his music first and he knows what he wants and needs for his music. even if it means leaving hyt who is basically a guarantee for popularity on this show. im so surprised xiao xiong isnt saying he will leave too.. or even hyt himself at this point. theyre all just... crying.... but honestly how can they make music without xiao li??? 

AWH my heart.... xiao li asking xiao xiong “你會恨我嗎?” i have never felt “do you hate me” hit me in the feels like this before. its such an OOF. and xiao xiong saying hes super close to xiao li, you can tell hes been under such emotional duress and xiao li has supported him through and now hes just conflicted between betraying hyt (who he wouldnt be here without) and suffering with hyt without xiao li there to help. this is so sad to watch..... ok but honestly just seeing how in this emotional time, ma zhe and xiao xiong are talking to xiao li and NOT hyt says something about how theyre afraid to touch him. 

what xiao li says about hyt being kidnapped by his popularity makes so much sense, with what hyt said about chasing after his expectations and trying to live up to them. hes really not relaxed. ever. and i think thats what xiao li doesnt want to work with. i respect that he wants to be recognized for his music rather than just be recognized. 

wat is this show doing why did they just stop and let them wallow in their feelings for hours??? wtf?? i mean i appreciate they respect that its a difficult and important decision but shouldnt they make them move on more efficiently?? what a waste of everyone’s time...

lol hyt learning some eq? yes you have to take care of your group members’ feelings, theyre people....

L O L XIAO LI GOING BACK ON HIS DECISION IM DYINGG HAHHAHAHAHHAHA WHAT A WASTE OF EVERYONES TIME HAHAHHAHA WHAT IS THIS SHOW. but okay yes i respect xiao li for having the guts to say he wants to leave, bc that hopefully gave hyt the wake up call he needed. BUT ALSO i do think staying with hyt makes sense career-wise. gaining popularity first isnt a bad thing. and he can always (continue to) prove his worth and make all different types of songs in the future, whether during or after his time with hyt. but staying with hyt = exposure, and thats never a bad thing. its just... hopefully they can resolve their emotional issues from here on out.

technically the smart move is to pick a popular contestant like zhao ke, to boost your group’s popularity overall. BUT hyt is so popular it really doesnt matter LOL 

L O L xiao li being like well i cant get the group i want anyway, so idgaf lets just keep on “戲劇化” HAHAHAHHA he gives no effs anymore

but also i cant imagine them with another non-instrumentalist LOL and what kind of style will they have now? 

ok wait let me go back to look at this:

hm yea the only other person of choice that would be helpful for votes is qiang ge. but i also cant imagine him on fruit planet???? ugh i wonder if qiang ge turned them down bc he feels like he’d ruin them like he blames himself for ruining his past groups. 

i cant believe xiao li said he tried to talk to qiang ge for 3 hours until 6am... to convince him to come to fruit planet? wild. 

UGH so sad that fruit planet didnt get a successful pick but honestly i am kinda glad mty didnt agree bc i kinda really would like to continue seeing xiao zhi play bass..... but ofc i guess it would be nice for him to show other skills too, ah im conflicted. but he really looks so carefree and like hes having so much fun when playing bass, id hate to take that away

LOL BASICALLY SZB CONFESSING TO MUJI HAHAHHAHAHA IS THIS A HIGH SCHOOL DRAMA ALL THE SUDDEN HAHAHHAHA actually i havent seen them interact before but i can kinda see muji’s personality meshing with their group’s, like hes kinda quirky and strange too LOL its cool they do get along tho

OOF SO MANY REJECTIONS. but also muji’s right, last time he wasnt strong enough, so i respect that hes really trying this time. 

omg szb throwing a tantrum and trying to force muji’s hand is not very respectful to muji’s wishes and it makes muji look like a bad guy :( im glad muji’s standing his ground tho, this is not the time to indulge a child’s tantrum lol

on the bright side, i love xiao zhi’s laugh, so at least we got something out of this LOL

LOL xy so easily pulling fsc over LOL why cant they all be like this LOL save tencent editing time LOL 

i knew there were too many emotions on ljt’s team........ i cant believe as soon as szb is like marginally okay, jym is like NOPE....... L O L 

.....i cant believe..... they’re just.... cutting it off...... like this....... WHAT IS THIS SHOW AHHAHAHAH okayyyyyyyyyyyy thennnnnnnn 

oof wasnt 車站 ljt’s last song before elimination? i just got hit with a wave of sadness and memories oof i wasnt ready 

man its so interesting bc i feel like on other shows, the contestants are always like “i dont want to get eliminated!” but here its like “i dont feel like i can fit into their music, id rather be eliminated.” its an interestingly different type of setting. i respect that they respect their own music, but i guess theyre not thinking enough about their future career progression? if they really want to make it in the music industry? idk. its interesting bc i feel like ljt has struggled so hard since getting eliminated from the first season that i assume / hope he has more of a mindset of wanting to make it to the end.

anyway im kinda surprised fruit planet made it so high LOL but yay for them, i really wonder what will happen with them picking their 5th member. im surprised qiang ge’s votes are so low? itll be sad if he really leaves though. ugh only 2 out of 4 groups successfully regrouped and one of them took an extra 2 hours to decide.... lol. i still dont understand why that was allowed in the first place but okay. this is the most struggle elimination ep ive ever seen LOL 

[germanicandhispanic]

basically any pasta bake you make, i guarantee you putting some heavy cream in there will make it 5 times better

on the subject of pasta bakes, cook the pasta before hand only slightly - remember, itll still be cooking in the oven too

furthermore, dont just put raw pasta into a pasta bake before you put it in the oven, all the other ingredients are already cooked and will burn if they have to bake as long as the pasta needs to cook

my go-to yummy vegetables are petit-pous (baby peas) fried with garlic (and bacon bits if you eat meat) - quick, easy to do, and absolutely delicious

find out if you're baked good are baked through by sticking a skewer in it - if it comes out clean, its cooked, if it comes out smudgy leave that sucker in the oven a bit longer

vegetable prep always takes longer than you think it will, you'll make your life so much easier if you prep before you actually start cooking, otherwise you'll be stressed af trying to get things ready before other things need to be done

FOLD your batters, dont stir them, it helps integrate/keep in air that will make the end result light and fluffy instead of stupidly dense

herbs (especially dried one) go in LAST, otherwise its almost impossible to taste them with any distinction

it seems counter-intuitive, but if you're not a huge fan of vegetables, put loads of different ones in a pot and cook them all together, the end result is usually a delicious stew sort of thing, even if you dont like those vegetables individually. usually works best when you've fried some kind of meat in the pot and then chuck the veggies in over it

it probably needs topping with cheese

too lazy to cook? but its winter and you want warmth? tinned ravioli in tomato sauce, bit of tinned tuna, bang 'em in a dish, cover with cheese (gouda or edam works best), bake 20 minutes et voila, food with basically 0 effort or cost

you WILL need more pepper than you think you need

you want good mashed potatoes? butter is your friend. more butter. always more butter. and a bit of cream (or milk if youre in a pinch)

(don't be afraid to chuck some chives in there either)

find an awful button down that you hate (or already has stains on it) and make it The Cooking Shirt - covers more than an apron

My friend asked how I learned to cook and the answer is I didn't. I know like 5 things about cooking and they are:

Always use more garlic than the recipe calls for

"Ehhh fuck it close enough" is a great measurement tool

Find like 5 recipes that you like, adjust them how you like them, make them until you hate them

Clean as you go

If a recipe is from a mommy blog, you will need more spices

If anyone wants to add, please do