#no but seriously I planned one build with this and now I'm like hmmm THINKING

[aesfocus]

In OTHER news uhhh if Hein/rix could pick for himself I wonder what he'd pick his Knight to be. hmmm

Rogue Trader continues to cause me to do things. (buy a non-t'au model who am I how did I get here)

[coupranghae808]

Birthday Blues

Pairing: Seungcheol x f.reader

Genre: Fluff, angst

Warning: Slight cursing, birthday blue depression

Summary: Seungcheol is always on time to self-congratulate himself on his birthday, you'd imagine he would do the same for others, except his timing wasn't perfect on Carat's birthday or even your birthday. But how can you rely on him to remember your birthday if he doesn't know?

A/N: This is my first ff, so bear with me y’all

The first year dating Seungcheol was a strange yet overwhelming journey, to say the least. As sweet as the first dates, first kisses, first "I love yous," first intimacy, and first everything, together really tested your small inexperienced heart, but as your first boyfriend, Seungcheol did everything in his power to ease the journey. I mean that's what the first year is all about, right? Getting to know each other and building trust on an intimate level. One fact that you learned about Seungcheol throughout your relationship was that Seungcheol always tends to be on standby minutes before his birthday to receive early birthday messages. In fact, the first couple weeks you two started dating, his brothers all warned you if you failed to congratulate him at midnight on the dot, he would become a sulky monster against you until the end of existence. Although they make it sound like an over exaggeration, sulky Seungcheol is truly a force to be reckoned with. It's not every day he gets showered in love and attention, so he always expects special treatment on his special day. You'd imagine he would do the same for others, except his timing wasn't perfect on Carat's birthday or even your birthday. But how can you rely on him to remember your birthday if he doesn't know?

The morning sunshine peeked through the windows, waking you from deep slumber. Tossing and turning in Seungcheol bed, hoping for early snuggles, your eyes opened, and you realized you were all alone in the empty bed. He must've left early for work It's not the best way to start the day, but you weren't going to let this ruin your day. The day immediately started with a phone call, not from Seungcheol but none other than your mother herself.

"Hello-"

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY Y/N!!"

"Aw thank you mom-"

Meanwhile, in the distance, Kkuma's ears perk up to the sound of your voice and dashes towards your end of the bed. She interrupts your conversation with sweet (aggressive) kisses; you have to calm her down with gentle pats brushing through her white fur.

"Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear Y/N! Happy birthday to you!"

"Wow, again thanks mom. That's all really sweet to say at 7 am."

"Oh please, can't I just celebrate my kid? It feels like just yesterday you were crying and screaming like a baby and now your__ years old. Gosh. Anyways, hopefully my gift arrives safely in the mail today. Any plans today? Maybe with that boyfriend of yours? Hmmm?"

Of course. Ever since you revealed your newfound partner to people, your mom especially, constantly pesters for any details about him or your relationship. However, dating a worldwide idol doesn't make your relationship any easier, so both of you agreed to be careful about what you share while protecting each other.

"His name is Seungcheol, and no, he hasn't mentioned anything to me, so I'll probably go on with my usual day."

"Ehhh? No, I'm sure he has something in mind like a surprise! *Gasp* How romantic would that be!?"

"Yeah sure. Look mom, I should really get going for today. Thanks for the birthday wishes."

"Yes, yes! Go on, come visit soon sweetie!"

"Alright, Love you-"

*Call Ended*

… Wow, for one who loves to yap, she was quick to end the call

You turned your attention back to Kkuma and cupped her fluffy tiny head in your hands.

"Do you think dad knows about today?" You asked.

There was a moment of silence as if she was seriously contemplating the question until she licked your nose as a pity response.

"Yeah, I'm not sure either. I'll try to ignore it, I suppose."

The mixed internal conflict running in your mind was condensed and released in the form of a heavy sign. Indulging in the peaceful hour, your eyes wander around his room, which eventually lands on the clock, reading 7:30 am!!

"Shit! How is it already 7:30? I'm going to be late- oh sorry hun."

The commute from Seungcheol place to your work only takes 15 minutes, but that wasn't even enough time to get ready. Kkuma, who becomes slightly concerned, watches you running left and right across Seungcheol’s place like a crazy maniac. It was a race against the clock, and there was only time for you to wash, dress, and gather your belongings. You miraculously managed to arrive in the nick of time. However, the moment you parked yourself dark storm clouds began to shroud the sky, and all your efforts to look put together were drenched, all in vain, by the cursed rain. To make matters worse, you misplaced your key card, which locked you out of the building.

Darn, I must've forgotten it back at Seungcheol's place. I almost made it too. Now what?

Sulking on your forgetfulness, you slowly approached the front doors, where you had to negotiate access into the building with security. To the security guards, you seem like an insane freak straight out of a horror film. It took several calls to your department to finally convince them. Once inside, you received several puzzled stares passing by as you trudged your way up the office. You finally arrived 30 minutes late to your desk only to soon be summoned by your authorities for a stern lecturing. You sat obediently through a literal bully session for your incompetence, selfishness, and inactive efforts that discourages your teams to meet deadlines. You've clearly seen better days before. Despite the cursed mishaps, you mask your disheartened feelings with a brave face and push forward. You mentally longed for Seungcheol to comfort you through this humiliating moment. Right on cue, when you attempted to contact him, your phone was on the verge of death, and you just so happened to forget your phone charger behind. *PerfecT*.

Meanwhile, in the practice rooms of HYBE INSIGHT, the seventeen members rehearsed their dance routine once more in preparation for their next comeback. After the dance coach instructed a 10-minute break, the members sat huddled together and took a moment to organize a celebratory party (but really an excuse to drink).

"This might be last minute, but why don't we have the party tonight? We could do it after practice at Mingyu and Wonwoo’s place." Hoshi exclaims.

"What dude? Just because I can cook multiple servings doesn't mean I'm gonna serve all your hungry asses," Mingyu argues. "Let's just go out to that new restaurant down the road."

"Oh, that sounds better! What’s the place called again? I'll get reservations ready," Seungcheol says as he searches for his phone.

"But Hyung, I thought you'd be busy tonight?" Seungkwan assumes with a confused face. This news alters all the members' attention towards him. Together their curiosity pierced Seungcheol for answers.

"Uh, nope. Why would you think that?

"Today is (insert bdate) right? I’m pretty sure that’s her birthday, so I figured you guys were going to celebrate."

"Birthday… I had no idea. She never said anything about a birthday." Seungcheol pauses in disbelief.

"What are you serious? You forgot?" Vernon hissed as he knocked him back into reality.

"Wait no, she never told me about her birthday. I need to call her."

His fingers fidgets through his phone to search for your contact. Seconds go by, and the ringtone eventually reaches voicemail. He hits the messages app in panic and spams texts nonstop, but there is still no response.

"Guys I think I really fucked up, she isn't responding back to me," Seungcheol whined while running his head through his hair. "What do I do now?"

"Hey, calm down it's not entirely too late, just-"

" Alright boys, break time is over now. Let's get in position for the last set." Seungcheol eyes widen

"I've got an idea hyung, let's get this over with so we can get out sooner."

After work, you stepped outside the building as the last person to finish. You had to work overtime to compensate for your tardiness this morning. You don't overlook the dark empty scenery before you. You let the cold breeze carry you toward your car and slump into your seat. This rarely isolated atmosphere allowed you to shed a few tears before you started your engine. You were well aware of your chronic case of birthday blues, yet each birthday seems worse than the last. Although you don't mind the attention people typically receive on their birthday, it breaks your heart knowing that most people in your life don't acknowledge you. You obviously can't blame Seungcheol; it was a miscommunication on your part, but you can help to feel unworthy, especially from the heck of a day you had. You just remind yourself that the day is finally over and you can ignore it like a regular old day.

You debated whether you should head straight home or back to Seungcheol place. Every fiber in your body wanted to return home, but you realized you still needed to pick up some essential items you had left behind after learning from your rookie mistakes today. You had no idea of Seungcheol's whereabouts; for all you could tell, he could still be practicing with the boys, asleep, or at home waiting for you. You prayed that wasn't the case because you weren't sure if you were emotionally prepared to confront and mask your weak self.

I'm just going to grab my stuff then leave without him knowing. Yeah… that's the plan

You stand facing Seungcheol's door and take a deep breath before entering. You glance up at the ceiling asking the universe for this impending fate to be in your favor for once. Once you stepped inside, the room was completely dark. There was a faint illumination from another room that piqued your interest. You silently slipped off your shoes and found a trail of rose petals on the floor leading to the light.

" Kkuma, no! Don't eat the roses, those are for Y/Nie. She should be here at any moment…*sigh* I hope she's safe." Seungcheol trembled while making some sort of commotion in the kitchen.

Now that you know Seungcheol is home, you wonder if it's too late to abort the mission, but your conscience reasoned that there is no turning back now. You haven't seen Seungcheol at all today, and he is expecting you. You tread carefully over the roses, following to the end of the trail and witness a sight to behold.

A candle-lit room with a soft romantic tune and the sweet aroma of all your favorite dishes traveled across the kitchen. Despite the pilling dishes in the sink, you realized his place was more polished than you remembered, decorated in fact. The dining table was set almost exactly similar to an elegant restaurant with wine, dinnerware, flowers, and even more candles. Then your attention averts to the man on the ground being all loving and affectionate with his daughter. She barks to alert your presence and struggles to escape her father's embrace.

"Hey…" he said breathlessly. He immediately stands and rushes to your side. You both stare lovingly until his arms engulf you in a warm hug.

"I missed you," he breaks the silence without letting go of you. "You didn't respond to any of my calls… l'm-"

Before he could finish his thought, you knew you had to clear the air.

"Yeah. Sorry, I had a bit of a rough day, and I left my charger here before I left for work," you release the hug to show him your inactive phone when you stare back at his gentle eyes. "So, My phone was basically dead the whole day."

"Oh…" He realizes. He struggles to find the right words to phrase his next thought.

"Look, babe. I'm not gonna pretend with you, especially when I *deep sigh* completely forgot your birthday. I'm so sorry." His voice cracked softly as he spoke the last sentence. He tilts his head up to hide his tears from rolling down his face.

"Oh, how did you uh, find out?" you stuttered.

"You were hiding it from me?"

" No I-"you left a sigh and avoided his eyes. "It's complicated, I didn't purposefully hide it from you… You see I don't exactly have a great relationship with my birthday. I don't know; I just always seem to dread the day because each year, I'm reminded I'm getting older and there’s still so much I haven’t accomplished… It makes me feel like a failure every time. When I was younger, every time I invited people to celebrate my birthday, I always felt guilty for forcing them into a party they would rather not be wasting time at, so I always found myself lonely on my birthday… I guess that's why I rarely tell people about my birthday."

You look back at Seungcheol's bloodshot eyes staring into you whilst he processes your words. His intense stare made you quiver and shrink in size. Before you could look away, Seungcheol slumped his head on your shoulder, and you could feel his hot tears staining your skin.

"You- How dare those shitty people make you hate yourself on YOUR DAY." You laugh in between your tears. Seungcheol takes a deep breath and kisses your tears. "Look I get it growing up sucks, but you can't be so hard on yourself. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, so it breaks my heart that you think that lowly of yourself."

You both probably spent a good minute hugging each other to digest each other's words when a soft beeping alarm from the oven catches both your attention. Seungcheol smiles and runs his hands from your shoulders to your hands, dragging you to the sound.

"I might not be the best first boyfriend, but I couldn't let the day end without celebrating it with my girl, so I, uh, tried to make you a cake and set up this special dinner."

He swears he saw the whole universe in your eyes when your eyes sparkled at his words. Together, you decorated the cake, danced hysterically to the music, sipped on wine, and dined with take-out before feasting dessert. All the early inconveniences that ruined you initially washed away with Seungcheol. Now Seungcheol lights the candles on the cake while singing to you.

" Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday, dear Y/N, Happy birthday to you~ Make a wish."

You clasped your hands together while taking a few seconds carefully deciding your precious wish. Once you mentally lock it in, you blow the flames out and watch the smoke dissipate between you and Seungcheol.

" What did you wish for?"

"I can't say if I want it to come true hmm?"

[kaledya]

In an alternate timeline, would Constantine and Serenity ever become an official couple?

I love both of their personalities, how different they are, but how well they balance each other out as well. Would Constantine be able to have genuine emotion of love for Serenity, would he ever consider a real future with her?

How would Serenity react if Constantine ever did hint of something more than a close friendship? Would she accept or deny it?

Thanks for reading, I love your work and your characters so much 🥹🫶🏽🫶🏽. Have a fantastic day Kaledya, keep UP the amazing work.

1) in SS AU I have no idea of ​​planning a romance between the two right now, in general I'm really trying to build a good friendship between them right now

//. But even if there's no romance between them There is a part where Constantin creates the illusion of 1940s New orleans to give as a gift to serenity and takes her there. (he wanted to give a gift that no one else could give) And in this way, he took Serenity to a place from which she could never return again, even if only for a short time,And plus he invented such a comprehensive illusion magic himself for this)

I really love this scene and find it sweet because before Constantine casts this spell, he asks Serenity to think about the place where her best memories are located.And when this illusion begins, Serenity appears in human form again, as does Constantine. They are seriously having fun and in the last scene, Serenity even goes to a place where her old house is (The spell is about creating a place with the memories of the targeted user, so the world they are in is Shaped according to Serenity's memories) I want to draw this scene. Serenity's reaction to what she saw in the beginning was very sweet. //.

But in another scenario, if Constantine were looking for a romantic partner, it would probably be Serenity. Currently, even in SSAU, And the only person who can understand what Constantine is going through is Serenity, and Serenity had similar experiences like Constantine when she was still alive. (I was even planning make a animatic with Loser Baby for them with changing the lyrics a bit )

And on the other hand, no matter how different they are, two people can understand each other. In general, I liken their relationship to Sherlock and Watson, or Marvel's Loki and Mobius, these two characters really complement each other.

Extra: And I'm really enjoying the dynamic of the two In fact, these days I am planning a orginal story about Crime(Detective) and adventure, not as an AU, but with Serenity and Constantine as the main characters. Maybe I can do some world building in terms of magic too. Idk

2) Hmmm, that's a really good question.If I were to think of such a scenario.Seriously, after so long of knowing each other(slowest slowburn) If Constantine realizes that what he feels is something more than friendship. He might try talking to Serenity about this. But I can already imagine Constantine seriously failing at the romance thing. (Ask this man the most difficult questions and he will give you the right answers without any hesitation or thinking too much about it. But ask this Man to tell you about his feelings and a knife event won't open his mouth)

Likewise, if there is friendship and trust between them, Serenity accepts the offer. And say something about it

"We were already like an old married couple, you just made it official."

It was my pleasure to answer your question!❤️❤️

And I'm very happy that you like my work.I wish you a fantastic day too🌟

[td-tbbg-official]

"Chef! Cheeeeef!"

"What? What's the matter?"

"What's taking the episodes so long? It's already been ages since the first one!"

"Um, nobody's demanding them. There's no pressure on us. It'll probably be out soon."

"How soooooooon?"

"I don't know. Am I supposed to know everything? The main producer's working on two other projects right now, with their interest in this one dying - obviously, things are hectic."

"Ugh, can't you at least give me an approximate date?"

"Fine, fine. Let me check my calendar. Hmmm..."

Total Drama: The Bridge Between Generations returns on Friday, June 7th, at 12 PM EST!

What glorious news for our fans worldwide - all seven of them must be rejoiced! But, in all seriousness, I hope you are ready for more misadventures with our 24-person cast, because next time, that number is going down by one!

The first team challenge and team vote of Total Drama: The Bridge Between Generations are just some of the things to be looking forward to in our next episode: Somewhat Happy Campers – Part 2! Be sure to have your eyes peeled for our awesomeness!

This has been Chris McLane – yours faithfully!

ooc note:

ok so i may or may not have gotten over my tdi interest. help.

making TD:TBBG was something i was really looking forward to, and to suddenly just have my interest evaporate (while keeping my disventure camp interest, which is a crime, someone get me out of this hellhole) is really disheartening. but with my rediscovery of my old fanfic series and the sudden need to rewrite it (and republish on ao3, so please if you like yandere simulator and/or my little pony, look out for it!! i promise despite YS' rep it's worth it because i hate dev as much as any sane person would), as well as getting back into TADC and my oc's story, i suppose it was inevitable.

TD:TBBG does have a few complete chapters. for the sake of not publicly embarrassing myself, i will not disclose how many. i can disclose, however, that there's not many. in fact, the 2nd, 3rd and 4th episodes may be all you'll be getting in a while.

i have a tendency of coming back to my interests after a great deal of time eventually - which is what has happened with yandere simulator, my little pony, sanders sides, detroit: become human, TADC, hitman and many others i am sure i haven't mentioned, countless of times. hell, this total drama phase was one of three.

so don't worry. i will eventually be back. and until i will fully be back, i will be pushing out these next three episodes. there's some good build-up and drama in them, so i hope you will enjoy them, but i'm really sad my heart's not fully in this anymore since i had a lot of good drama planned. i'm very hopeful however, and i think i will eventually come back to this. please just be patient with me.

thank you for your understanding and for following and keeping up with total drama: the bridge between generations!!!

[one-strugling-bean]

OFMD Random Commentary (Ep 4)

I like that you can see that they are both extremely uncomfortable at the wedding

Oh of course he was a father that played with his kids...

Ah yes, very kind of BB to watch over Stede as he sleeps

Not Lucius beating on the ship's handrail with a tiny hammer and the biggest bitch pose in the world

"Izzy, Izzy, come, they've got a bird guy!" Why is he precious

Oh, but Mary is actually trying and putting effort into their marriage, nouuu that makes it even harder for me to like Stedeeeee

The painting is honestly quite pretty too

Yeah, this is not a relationship I can take sides in...

Okay, he's Edward then

And he's got anger issues alright

He's looking at Stede so tenderly, my god

My boy Lucius really came in at a bad time

Stede would wear a hat to bed

Mary really tried for them... I really do feel bad for her...

Wow that hellish dream sequence was super scary ngl

Ed. Ed is nice, I like Ed

"Fuck off!" "Fucking mental..." Ed is me right now

Also, of course, Stede would build secret passages into his ship for fun

Omg, I get why she's annoyed, but the crew's questions keep getting dumber and it's honestly a little bit funny

So, one feels trapped in the aristocratic life and the other feels trapped in the pirate life - what a match

"You're a fucking lunatic and I like it" I get what he means I think, I also fell for Stede's lunacy in ep 1

I will say tho, I won't be surprised if this ship goes up in flames by the end of the season. They've been hinting at it so much

Omg, they switched clothes, this is amazing. They are so silly I love them both now, it's official

Not Ed playing with the wavy sleeves - I would do it too

Hmmm but Ed is a ticking bomb waiting to explode isn't he

Lucius with the countdown..... that was very good

Damn, so Ed really is a genius sailor

I feel like we might see more of this lighthouse metaphor

He brought them breakfast.... that is genuinely such a sweet thing. Stede just won a few more points with me

Bringing more marmalade instead of gunpowder, I love him

Ed is playing double trucies..... I know he'll regret it eventually, but still, that's meanie

Or maybe not?

Yeah, Ed is very much playing for his own side here. Just can't tell which one that is, yet

Okay, it's time for predictions. I honestly have no clue where this story is going but I'm gonna take a couple guesses anyway.

Stede will eventually find out Ed planned on betraying him and he'll be sad.

Stede's crew will at some point have to choose between sticking with their captain (aka staying loyal) or betraying him - honestly not sure what they would choose.

The Revenge will catch fire, and it'll start in the library.

This season won't end happily. And probably it'll end on a cliffhanger.

Stede might go back to his family by the end of the season. Something along the lines of "You go back to your old life and we'll spare your crew and paramour (Ed)"

Ed will have a rage outburst in front of Stede and depending on how seriously it's treated, it'll push Stede away.

Izzy will fuck things up on purpose thinking he's doing the right thing.

Aaaand that's about it I think. I can already feel my future self laughing at my idiocy from beyond the veil of time, but we'll see how wrong I am when I get there.

For now, let's keep watching :>

[love-advice-on-call]

hellooo Kinda a weirder one i think

I'm kind of looking for advice on how to not feel jealous

My long distance BF was in a relationship with his best friend of 10 years (Dated her for the first 6, just friends for the last 4) Theyre close but have made it very clear their romantic feelings dont exist anymore. The Ex Gf is in a great relationship with another one of their mutual friends and my BF dated other people in between ex gf and me. My BF even talked about it to make sure and disclosed to me what broke them up.

Consciously i know i can trust them, and that i know i have 0 worries in this ending in betrayal, but there's a feeling in my heart that makes it hurt when they're acting close and i'm around. part of what's made me feel like it's subconscious was my first interaction was her sizing up my personality over phone to see if i wasn't a bad person/not fit to date her friend and i want her to like me because i love my bf.

How do I let those subconscious feelings go?? I worry it'll cause problems later if i can't.

Hmmm I think it will be hard to let go of those feelings for you and I can see why. I mean, regardless of best friend or not, they dated for 6 years and have been friends for 4. That's a pretty big deal and a large amount of time to get to know someone. It can magnify when you are long distance and I get the feeling of this making you feel hurt to see them so close.

Truth of the matter is, you don't have the relationship your boyfriend and his best friend have. I don't know how long you two have been dating, but she's got the 10 years on you regardless of the dating. Knowing someone for that long just builds up a strong relationship and even if they never dated you might still feel the same way you do now. You are his girlfriend though which is also a different relationship. One where you two are trying to build a life together and have an end goal to be together and I think you should try to focus on that.

Like you said, you have 0 worries of a betrayal and I support that. I mean the way you talk does sound like everyone here is honest and straight forward. I think if you want to get over these subconscious feelings, then you need to be more mindful when you do slip into the hurt and you should focus on building a stronger bond with your boyfriend. Maybe even get to know this best friend better so you too can see the kind of value she brings to his life so you get more comfortable with seeing her. I also think, if you haven't already, that you and your boyfriend figure out how and exactly when the long distance will be over. In was long distance with my girlfriend and what really pulled us through was knowing when we'd be together in person again. Having that goal really gave me confidence in knowing that we both took/take the relationship seriously since you plan where to live together.

You can also bring this up to your boyfriend if you want, but be careful how you choose your words and make sure he knows you have confidence in him and that it's more about the feelings you get when you see how close someone else gets to be with you. Not that you want to stop it, but that you want to get more comfortable. As far as being mindful, you can try meditating so you can catch yourself when you slip into thinking about how you may be hurt about this and remind yourself that he is your boyfriend and what you two are trying to build together. As far as building a stronger bond, this is difficult, but not impossible to do when long distance. Make sure you guys see each other. Send each other little letters, voice messages, just do what you can to let the both of you know you're thinking about each other in your daily lives. This requires effort from both ends and you should do this regardless of this best friend situation. Have something to look forward to when you can't be around each other. You'll know for sure this is effort that his best friend isn't getting and he'll know that you're thinking about him on the daily.

Posted June 28, 2024

[themyzzinglink]

oh you wanna talk motherfucker?! *does this to you*

What motivates you to work hard?

What form of public transportation do you prefer, and why? (air, boat, train, bus, taxi, etc.)

What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve done lately?

What is your favorite thing about your career?

If you could live anywhere, where would it be?

Who is your hero?

What is your favorite book to read?

What are your hobbies?

What is your biggest fear?

If you could choose to do anything for a day, what would it be?

What is the best gift you have been given?

What really makes you angry?

What is your proudest accomplishment?

If you were a superhero, what powers would you have?

What are two of your biggest pet peeves?

Do you believe in second chances?

What’s been your biggest mistake so far in life and what did you learn from it?

What qualities did you inherit from your parents?

What do you most look forward to about getting old?

Are you passionate about collecting anything?

Awww shit they cast the "start talking, bitch" beam and it hit me like a truck.... Let's fucking gooooo

With my current job I try to work hard to get the mail around in time so I can be home earlier hhh And the money I get of course. But the real hard work will come in August when I start my new education and job and I will work hard to prove to myself that I CAN do it and to learn new things and to build towards a future I like.

Love trains! Busses are nice too but can be too crowded and sometimes make me a little uncomfortable. Once went with the local small bus here (bc my dad drove it) and it was lovely! I love a good long train ride though!

I haven't really done a lot of spontaneous things recently I'm afraid. Did go out today to get new glasses unplanned! I did really need new ones it seemed... Oh and I made a fire and sat by it last night for Beltane! Hadn't super planned that and just went let's just do it!

My favourite thing about my current job is getting to know some people in my rounds, chatting with people in the streets! With my new career idk yet! Probably will be being in nature and working with it!

I would love to live in some more foresty areas, more nature! Maybe somewhere in scandinavia! Though I really don't mind where I live now to be honest. Maybe Scotland or Ireland too?

I don't really have a hero I think! I don't really think of people in that way I suppose, never really thought about it.

I always love reading The Hobbit! Or Mort by Terry Pratchett. Or Murder on the Orient Express. Also Koning van Katoren as a Dutch book.

My hobbies are playing video games, going on walks, watching murder mysteries (and other films and shows), baking and I want to pick up reading again...

My biggest fears revolve around me losing the things I care about most and I don't really want to go into specifics with that. Not my biggest fear, but I can't sleep with my door open hhh

There are so many things I can't do that I would love to for a day... Idk... maybe be an actress in a series I like? Or like a michelin critic...

Best gift ever would be all the slakkies I got gifted over the years heheh. But aside from those the VR headset I got for my birthday one year that my closes friends put money towards. (big thank you still to all of youuuu)

I don't really get angry easily. But I get mad when someone does not take me seriously or keeps making fun of me. Also quite some right wing word views. And a lot of things that are happening in the world right now.

My proudest accomplishment... probably graduating high school. OH no wait it's quitting therapy because it had *really* helped and I didn't need it anymore!

Hmmm I would love to have teleportation powers. But I would probably have powers to give people a good sleep or something. Snork mimimi powers.

Pet peeves! I can't stand loud eating sounds and really dislike being interrupted (sometimes it just happens but if it's often grr)

Okay so I though that I found my biggest mistake but I was wrong so honerable mention: going to uni to study art history. Not because of the subject, I still adore art and museums and art history, but because academic studying is NOT for me. Sure learned that. And learned not to tie my self worth to my academic accomplishments!

Actual biggest mistake was not visiting my grandpa more often when he was alive. Not properly telling him I loved him. Learned to visit my one living gran more often.... Now I just gotta do it and not regret it all when she passes.

I do believe in second chances fullheartedly. It of course depends on how the first chance got fucked, some things I can't give another chance to. But generally yeah! People change! People grow!

Oh my parents and I are all very good at having a great time doing very little. Taking things slow, chilling out. We revel in calmth. Inherited being good with kids from my dad! Inherited my honesty from my mom maybe.

SO many things to look forward about getting old! Seeing the world, meeting people, falling down and getting up! But I legit look forward to being an old lady on a porch looking at the garden. Maybe find someone to spend my life with and be there with them. Making my own family, however that may go. Growing old and not fearing people's judgement, being a weird old prune!

Am I passionate about collecting something.... *profusely sweating* n... nooo... I mean... I have 31 of the same plushie in varying colours and sizes, all with their own names, amassed over the last 20 years... So yeah I collect the slakkies <3 <3 <3

HOO that took me a while but I am very grateful for the ask because I could babble on and on. Thank you, anon! <3 always love chatting away on here heh

[caranfindel]

Recap/review 15.18: “Despair”

THEN: The key to Billie's library. Billie wants to become God. Cas made a deal with The Empty. Chuck absorbed Amara. Jack absorbed Adam's rib. Dean pointed a gun at Sam (DEAN POINTED A GUN AT SAM.) Chuck is pissed. Jack is going to explode.

NOW: We begin right where we left off last week, with Jack about to explode with God-killing power. Sam half-carries him into the map table room, Cas tells him to take deep breaths and focus, and Dean gets all panicky and is no help at all. Jack wants the guys to just leave him outside in order to minimize the damage when he goes kaboom. {Sidebar... how far away would he have to be, considering that his explosive power could kill God? Discuss.} Dean yells at Sam to find one of Rowena's spells (and oh, Sam as Rowena's apprentice; there's a plot that was sadly wasted, wasn't it?) but he's interrupted by Billie and her scythe, which she's carrying in a very obvious way. She's furious, and tells them the plan to destroy Chuck was doomed "because of you." Billie can't stop Jack's earth-shattering kaboom, "but there is something I can do." She sends him to the Empty. Empty!Meg cheerfully points out that he doesn't look so hot, but then he looks explosively hot. Ah, there's our earth-shattering kaboom!

Bunker. Billie explains that The Empty was the only option to absorb the impact of Jack the Bomb. And that he's not necessarily dead, because taking out Chuck and Amara was the part that was fatal, not actually being the bomb. Hmm. So Jack's point of no return wasn't actually a point of no return after all. It's kinda retconny, but not really? I've decided it's logical and I approve.

However, if the Empty survives, "it's gonna be pissed." Particularly at Billie. And it's very strong. Billie and Sam remind us that the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned. They do not get into the details of what constitutes a summoning, but I'm sure that isn't important. And Billie might be willing to bring Jack back, assuming he survived, but not until Sam returns what he took from her. Chuck's death book.

Sam immediately goes on the attack. He points out that she was planning to betray them from the start, leading to the deaths of all the AU refugees and everyone who was brought back from death, including him and Dean. "Even if I give you the book," he says, "what's to stop you from stabbing us in the back? Killing us all?"

"Nothing," Billie says. She gets up in Sam's face and tells him Jack won't last long. Either give her the book now, or lose him forever. (Can I just point out that Sam is still a little bloody from Dean punching him in the face? After he pointed a gun at him?)

Meanwhile, in the Empty, we discover that Jack is still alive (yay) and that this episode was directed by Richard Speight (yay). He is surrounded by particles that gradually form back into Empty!Meg. And, as predicted, she's pissed.

In the bunker, Sam brings the book to Billie, but ignores her outstretched hand and slams it onto the table instead. It's a pointless little burst of defiance and I love it.

Billie flips to the end to read the new ending of God's book, "since you ruined the last one." She seems to like what she reads. Sam says "Wait, the ends of your books change? So me killing Rowena was presented as unavoidable fate but it really wasn't necessary at all?" No, he actually doesn't. But I do, on his behalf. It's a pointless little burst of defiance. Over in the Empty, Empty!Meg grabs Jack's head and says "you made it loud!" and this is a conversation I've had with my dogs in the wee dark hours of the morning more times than I can count because we just want to SLEEP, GUYS but before she can actually crush his head, Billie zaps him back to the bunker.

Billie tells the guys that Jack is hers because he's still useful. Dean responds by grabbing her scythe and swinging at her. She flings him away, but she's wounded and bleeding light. Oh, and she dropped the book. Sam and Cas ignore Dean crumpled over against the wall - Cas runs to comfort Jack, and Sam runs to pick up the book. Unfortunately, he can't open it. Dean says "hey, thanks for not helping me, guys" and Sam says "oh, I'm sorry, I guess I'm still a little rattled from you punching me in the face after you pointed a gun at me." No, he doesn't. But I do, on his behalf.

Several people have pointed out how skinny Jared looks in these last few episodes, but this is the first time I've noticed it. It will be interesting to see how he looks in the two that were filmed after their Covid shutdown.

Time jump. Dean is sitting in the library, drinking whiskey. And I've said it a million times but I'll say it again - I could watch an entire episode that was just Dean drinking. And then it gets even better when Sam walks in wearing only a v-neck t-shirt. Single layer Sam alert, guys! How long has it been? Dean slides the bottle over to him and we get a little bonus hand porn and then this happens:

Sam, I'm sorry about... everything.

Dean, you don't have to -

I pulled a gun on you. It's like I just couldn't stop. You know, we were so close to beating him. Like, I could smell Chuck's blood in the water, and I - nothing else mattered. It was everything. And I just couldn't snap out of it.

Well, you did. You've snapped me out of worse.

Hmmm. Am I missing a time when Dean snapped Sam out of something? I mean, I know in Stull, Sam was able to overcome Lucifer because of Dean. But that was Sam snapping himself out of it. And Dean convinced Sam to give up the trials, but that wasn't Sam under anything that he needed to be "snapped out of." I think if you're going to give Dean credit for snapping himself out of it when confronted by his teary eyed, bloodied little brother, you have to give Sam credit for snapping himself out of his own situations.

It doesn't matter. All that matters is these two sitting quietly in the dark, drinking whiskey together.

Dean's feeling some despair (nice) because Billie wants them dead, Jack is powerless (oh, wait, when did that happen?), and Michael isn't answering his prayers. No one is on their side. "Well, we regroup, somehow," says Sam. They drink a sad little toast to "somehow," and I die a thousand deaths.

Billie's library. Billie stalks angrily through the stacks. A reaper informs her he put up warding to keep the Empty out, and asks if the plan has changed. Yes, it has.

Elsewhere, a woman we don't know is cooking some seriously dry scrambled eggs. She thinks she knows what she's doing, because she's explaining to someone else in the room how to cook eggs so they're "not too runny, not too dry" but seriously. Gordon Ramsay would be appalled. {Sidebar: Gordon's eggs actually look a bit too runny for my taste, and my family would refuse to eat them, but this lady's dry crumbly eggs are still an abomination.} She turns around and we see AU Charlie sitting at the kitchen table. Oh, Charlie has a girlfriend! Sweet. And she must be in love, because she tells this girlfriend that they're the best eggs she's ever had. And also, she's still hunting. Guess she didn't retire to a mountaintop after all. Probably because she couldn't get wifi. Anyway. Her girlfriend's plate crashes to the floor because her girlfriend abruptly disappeared. (Aw, her name was Stevie. Stevie and Charlie. How cute is that?)

Time jump. Charlie's apartment building is called Kim Manor. Nice.

As Sam runs the EMF meter (and there's a nice wordless conversation where Sam lets Dean know he didn't find anything), Charlie talks about how they met (thanks to AU Bobby) and how she experienced nothing when Stevie disappeared. No sulphur smell, no cold, nothing. Dean and Sam have another wordless conversation about what they think happened.

Dean and Sam explain that Billie wants to send all the AU people back to their now non-existent worlds. So Stevie was from AU World too? I guess that explains how AU Bobby knew her. Coincidentally, Sam's phone rings, and it's AU Bobby. They have an extremely short conversation in which Sam learns that another AU hunter simply vanished. And there's no explanation on Sam's end, just "yeah, I understand." So have they already talked to AU Bobby about the Billie situation? Or was Sam and Bobby's conversation literally "hey, a hunter vanished into thin air, how weird is that" and "yeah, I understand" with no further discussion? Anyway. Dean says it's open season on anyone from another world (aw, sorry, Winchesters in Brazil), anyone who came back from the dead, and Sam gets a horrified look on his face and says "Eileen." Oh shit!

Meanwhile, out by the Impala, in broad daylight, Jack tells Cas that he feels strange because the plan failed and his destiny was averted. "I was ready to die, and I wanted to - for Sam, for Dean, for the world - I wanted to make things right. And now I don't know why I'm even here." OF COURSE HE LISTED SAM FIRST. Cas tells him he didn't need absolution from anyone, and that they care about him not because of his usefulness, but just because he's him. Somewhere Dean says "um, wait." Jack is scared because he's powerless and can't protect anyone. Cas is too. So, did Jack lose his powers after the earth shattering kaboom? Or earlier, and I just wasn't paying attention?

Nighttime. Dean speeds down the road as Sam texts Eileen. I don't know where Eileen is, but she must be pretty far away from Kim Manor. Sam told her to get out of her house, go somewhere public, and wait by her car. Now, I cover the guest star credits, so I don't know if Shoshanna is in this episode. But even unspoiled, I'm pretty sure she's not going to be there when they arrive. She starts to type a response, as evidenced by the bubbles, but then stops responding. Yep, just as I thought, no one is standing by her car. Sam finds her phone on the ground, cracked as if it were dropped (like, say, by someone who disappeared while holding it) and LOOK AT HER LOCKSCREEN. LOOK AT IT.

Some will say this is just the photo that pops up when Sam texts her but they are WRONG. This is her FREAKING LOCK SCREEN, PEOPLE.

Anyway. He sees the unfinished message she was writing, which says she's by her car. Aw, Sam. Dean tries to talk to him and he says "I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now."

Aw, SAM!

Sam compartmentalizes his grief and jumps into take-care-of-everyone mode. He says they need to gather everyone together, and they need to find a location central to everyone. Well, I mean, there is one place I know of that is literally the central most point in the United States, maybe you could go there? It's supposed to be secure from all things supernatural, too. Dean says that while Sam is going that, he is going to go end what he started. OH, GOOD. I WAS HOPING THEY WOULD SPLIT UP. "We couldn't make Chuck pay, but Billie? She left her blade. Her I can kill." Hey, wouldn't be the first time. Sam agrees, Cas says he'll go with Dean, and we get a brother hug. Once again, Dean does the two things I love when he hugs Sam: 1. he puts his arms on top, as if he were still the taller brother, and b. he looks away and packs up his emotions before he lets Sam see his face after the hug. "Let's go, Cas," he says. "Let's go reap a reaper." Cas turns and follows without saying anything at all to Sam or Jack, but I'm sure that won't be an issue.

Time jump - it's daytime. Sam's on the phone with Donna, who is standing outside her truck (but didn't she used to have a big black SUV?) at that bridge we've seen so many times. She's sending him to "the old Harmon property," which should be just what he's looking for because it has an abandoned silo. I mean, I wouldn't jump immediately to abandoned silo, but maybe there weren't any abandoned warehouses around. She says it's in Hastings, just south of her, and if you think I didn't confirm that the town of Hastings is in fact about 30 minutes south of Stillwater, Minnesota then you just don't know me at all.

Sam is at a gas station and oh, he's driving Eileen's car! That's not heartbreaking at all. I guess she didn't have her keys in her pocket when she disappeared. (Hah, like Sam Winchester needs keys.) Donna and AU Bobby are rounding up everyone they can think of. She asks what the plan is, and Sam bends down creepily to look at Jack in the passenger seat and says "I'm still working on that." I mean, I know they keep telling us Jack lost his powers, but the way Sam looks at him right here certainly suggests Jack is part of the plan, and maybe not in a good way. (Spoiler alert: seriously, why do I even bother.)

Sam comes around to Jack's window and tells him he needs him to drive, because Sam needs to work on archives and spells and stuff. And is that true, or is this just "I don't expect you to live through this part so I want to let you have some time behind the wheel of Eileen's 1970 Plymouth Valiant?" (At least that's what The Husband thinks it is.)

Bunker. Enter Dean and Cas. Dean declares that if Billie isn't in her library, they'll just trash the place to "smoke her out." It's an interesting choice of words.

Foreshadowing Dean as the new Death? (Remember, I'm completely unspoiled. I know nothing.)

Silo. Let's stick to this location for now. Sam and Jack pull up and are greeted by Donna. Jack goes inside to set up the warding, and Donna gives Sam a nice hug.

I want to be there.

She tells him she's sorry about Eileen and gets one of his sad little nods that I love so much. Bobby is already here, and she name-drops Garth and Jody and the girls, saying they're on "high alert." Sam tells her they're not on Billie's list, so they should be safe. And so should Donna. Well, that's good to know. Sam's surprised to see Charlie pull up. She tells him "I just don't want this to happen to anyone else." I don't know what you think you're going to be able to do, Charlie, but okay.

Turns out the silo is actually a Tardis, so I guess maybe it was a good choice. It's huge on the inside, and is also more finished than any silo I've ever been in (which is, okay, one silo, but still.) The interior is already heavily warded. Several people are milling about. {Sidebar: How many hunters were away from the bunker when Michael attacked, and why have none of them returned?} Bobby tells Sam that as soon as the hunters heard he wanted them there, they came running. "Whether you like it or not, you're the big man here." Hey, I wonder if the guy who called him Chief is here. Bobby, being a man after my own heart, is mostly concerned about the bathroom situation. Sam hopes they won't be there long enough for it to be an issue. He has a spell from Rowena (!) that should boost the strength of the wards, but that's all he has. Bobby doesn't look very reassured, and glances in a foreshadowy way at a family with kids. Sam looks around at all of these people he feels responsible for and takes a deep breath and oh, my heart.

Donna and Jack are painting more wards. Jack bends down to look at a plant, and Donna comes up to him and says "I'm no expert on this hoodoo stuff, but best we patch that up, yeah?" and I don't know what the hell she's talking about. What is this plant disturbing? Jack reaches out to touch the plant and it withers away as his hand gets close. Friends, I'm pretty sure this is a bad sign. Jack is too. He stares at his hand, and if he'd been watching a few seasons ago, he would have noticed that plants did the same thing when Amara touched them. Coincidence???

Later we see everyone watch as Sam recites the spell. (Yes, it's hot. Do you even have to ask?) The sigils glow red briefly and then fade, and the music turns ominous and I think this means his boost failed. But I guess not, because Sam says now they wait. But they don't have to wait long, because suddenly one of the children dissolves into smoke. One by one, all of the AU people dissolve like they've been snapped by Thanos. Charlie runs up to Sam and says "Sam, what do we do" just like Maggie did, and just like Maggie she's taken out immediately. Sam watches in horror as AU Bobby smokes out. He turns to Donna, who says "Mr. Stark, I don't feel so good," and then Donna is gone! Crap! Jack and Sam are left staring at the empty-except-for-them silo.

One more serving of despair, coming right up.

On to the other side.

Dean enters Billie's library, brandishing the scythe. Cas follows, bearing only a hangdog expression. Dean motions for him to go one direction and Dean goes the other, soon finding Billie. He thinks he's sneaking up behind her, but she says "So, I guess this is the part where I say hello boys. Hello, boys." Oh, I was wrong; Cas has his angel blade. Billie snarks about Dean's bad aim, and he says he wasn't trying to kill her then (which seems like a lie), but he is now, because of what she's doing to his people. Billie slams him against the wall again. She chokes Cas Darth Vader-style from a distance, and then the old fashioned way. "Remember when you stabbed me in the back?" she says. "Because I do." Oh, that's funny, because earlier Sam said she was going to stab them in the back. She should have said "like you stabbed me?"

Dean comes to the rescue by poking her with the blunt end of the scythe rather than the pointy end, so maybe she was right about his bad aim. Then he gets the blade against her throat (but still not the sharp end, just the back) and demands that she stop killing his friends. She says she didn't - it was Chuck. And Dean's wasting time.

I'm considering it time well spent, because it looks so nice.

Billie tells Dean the injury he gave her earlier is something she can't recover from - she's going to die. She pulls away her coat to show him a nasty festering wound, and I wonder why something so physical would kill her, but. Eh. She tells him she doesn't care about his friends or family. "But seeing you here has reminded me of something. There is one thing I'd like. One wish before I go. I'd like to see you dead." She grabs her scythe back, flings the boys around, and slowly stalks toward them. Dean and Cas rush through the door back into the bunker.

Dean is panicky again, trying to figure out what to do next. He's suddenly struck down by chest pain, and I expect to see someone sticking a knife (or a scythe) in his back, but it's actually Billie doing it Darth Vader-style again. Cas drags him away as Billie monologues. "It's you, Dean; it's always been you. Death-defying. Rule-breaking. You are everything I lived to set right. To put down. To tame. You are human disorder incarnate." Yeah, we know, Dean's awesome. We get this speech every season.

Cas and Dean end up in the dungeon storeroom. Cas gets Dean's knife out of his pocket and cuts his own hand to paint a sigil on the door. It looks like an angel banishing sigil, but apparently it block's Billie's power. Not permanently, though, because it fades as she pounds on the door. Cas says that since the wound is killing her, they just have to wait her out.

Yeah, and if we can't?

Then we fight.

We'll lose. I just led us into another trap. All because I couldn't hurt Chuck. Because I was angry, and because I just needed something to kill, and because that's all I know how to do.

Dean.

It was Chuck all along. We never should have left Sam and Jack. We should be there with them now.

Yes you should, Dean, you really really should. Dean is practically drowning in despair, which, you know. Is a good thing. 10/10 would recommend. "She's gonna get through that door," he tells Cas. "And she's gonna kill you, and then she's gonna kill me. I'm sorry."

"Wait, there is one thing she's afraid of," Cas says. "There's one thing strong enough to stop her." He tells Dean about the deal he made to save Jack in the Empty.

Friends, I'm going to do you a favor. If you haven't seen the episode, and aren't planning to watch the episode, I want you to read this paragraph and then skip down until you see the pretty picture of Dean. And start reading after that picture. Trust me. So, Cas summons the Empty just as Billie breaks down the door. The Empty kills Billie, but she also takes Cas. Dean is saved but Cas is gone.

{Sigh. Can I skip this part? No, I owe it to you.}

Cas explains that the Empty was going to come snatch him away as soon as he experienced a moment of true happiness. But happiness isn't having, happiness is knowing. And Dean is wonderful and "Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love." You just threatened to shoot your little brother for love, for example. Cas is teary eyed and Dean looks confused as hell and I pause the TV and turn to The Husband and we have this conversation:

I don't think I can watch this.

Why, because it's so sappy?

No, because I think they're going to kiss.

What? Why would they kiss? Is there something I'm missing?

Because part of the fandom WANTS them to kiss, and there's this group of fans that are super obnoxious about it, and they harass the actors and the writers and I think now the show thinks EVERYBODY wants them to kiss. Even though the guy who plays Dean* says it would never happen. Because I know he wasn't happy about the way the show ended, and I'm afraid this is why he wasn't happy.

...

I don't think they're gonna kiss.

If they do, I'm done.

*The Husband is not on a first name basis with Jensen.

So, let me point out that The Husband, who watches this show the way a normal human being watches a show (i.e., doesn't interact with the fandom at all), had absolutely NO expectation that they would kiss. Anyway, with some trepidation, I push play again. And Cas is still going. Dean is the most caring, selfless, loving human being on earth (OH GOD MAKE IT STOP) and knowing him has changed Cas.

Why does this sound like a goodbye?

Because it is. I love you.

Don't do this, Cas.

We see a black blob materialize behind Dean, because even though the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned, there it is. And I could argue about whether Cas being happy actually summoned the damn thing but I've already lost the will to live, so instead I'm going to describe to you how I watched in horror, with my finger hovering over the pause button, as Cas reached out to Dean and put his hand on his shoulder. But he just pushed him out of the way. Thank you baby Jesus. Billie breaks the door down as the Empty slurps into the dungeon. It surrounds Cas and Billie and sucks them into its depths. Dean is left alone. Oh, and he has a bloody palm print on his jacket from Cas grabbing his shoulder. I guess someone did watch a little bit of older seasons after all. Hard to tell sometimes.

I mean, at least he looked good, right?

Back at the silo. I've decided it must be mostly underground and isn't a grain silo like I thought. So what kind of silo do Yankees have that's mostly underground? Anyway. Jack and Sam emerge, having failed catastrophically at their mission. Sam is trying to call Dean, who isn't answering. He looks mildly panicky. "Sam?" Jack says, a little shaky. "Was it just them?"

OH CRAP. I didn't even think of that possibility.

"I don't know," Sam says, also shaky. And as we see an empty gas station and playground, it really looks like it wasn't just them at all. Sam and Jack look at each other, alone and terrified. And back in the bunker's dungeon, Dean's phone rings. It's Sam. He doesn't answer.

Despair!

So. You know how sometimes something really good will happen in an episode? And I'll say, no matter how bad this episode is, this 90 seconds makes it worth it? Well, sometimes the opposite happens. Sometimes you get a two or three minute scene - a horribly written, badly acted scene - and it's so awful that it ruins an episode. A season. A show. I'm angry that the showrunners pandered to a small, noisy minority of fans to throw something into the show that most fans didn't want and didn't help the story at all. I'm annoyed that, once again, Dean is put up on an embarrassingly overwrought pedestal. I'm kind of amused that they did this in the worst way possible. Cas's love was unrequited (unless they screw that up in the next episode), Misha's acting caused so much secondhand embarrassment that I had a hard time watching again, and from what I see on Tumblr, half of the Destihellers are furious because "Dean is a homophobe." Which is bullshit. Not returning someone's romantic affection isn't homophobia. It's consent. (I know... on this show? Ha ha.)

{Sidebar: If "Destiel" means the characters have mutual feelings for each other, doesn't this mean Destiel is not, in fact, canon? I mean, it was already so badly written that one could argue Cas wasn't proclaiming romantic love, but just a life-changing experience thanks to one human. Discuss.}

But I need to stop thinking about it. I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now.

And this wasn't even the Buckleming episode, friends. There is probably a Buckleming episode left.

I got so distracted by this nonsense that I almost forgot to talk about the Jack situation. So here's how I feel about that. I love Jack as a character. I love him as someone the Winchesters could lose (Basically, someone to stuff in the fridge? Why not.) But I don't want him to be one of them. I don't want Jack's story to be treated as if it were as important as the Winchester's story. Just like I didn't want Cas to have his own plots. I want it always, always to come down to Sam and Dean.

Anyway, I'm sure I'll have more to say. But for right now, all I'm saying is this: I pledge to stick with this show, to stick with fanworks, no matter how badly they fuck up the landing. But guys, you don't have to try so hard to fuck it up.

Two to go. As always, help me stay unspoiled, including casting info and episode titles.

[savrenim]

mx savrenim! mx. savrenim! I have a writing question: Im writing a story about people who can see the future, and I'm wondering how you made it feels more like a memory not like, a gut wrenching tragedy? Its deffo painful, but Im pretty sure you mentioned wanting to give it a happy ending? If so: how. The concept of future vision is so cool but the implications and the way it plays out is horrifying and heartbreaking rip. I just wanna give my characters some chance at a happy ending

gods okay this is a good question that I have a lot of Weird Strong Feelings about bc time is the single thing that I have the strongest opinions about let’s go under the cut

so the thing that makes your question interesting to me-- “how do you make a story with future powers not a gut-wrenching tragedy”-- is that..... to me, at least, there is absolutely nothing inherent in the setup of future-seeing powers that should imply that the story should be a gut-wrenching tragedy? your problem is assuming that there has to be anything tragic involved. free yourself from that perception and you will be free to write whatever you want.

ifmlam is a gut-wrenching tragedy right now because the feeling that I was going for was “hmmmm the exact gut-wrenching feeling that The World Was Wide Enough makes me feel” and it’s having a happy ending because I decided to write a fic bc “goddamnit I need a fix-it, like, right now.” Seeing the future is cool but it’s also just a plot-and-setting device. and the story feels the way it feels because I designed how it works around exactly how I wanted it to feel?

my current other major project, trash novel, is about a seer who hunts down other seers for dramatic stop-the-world-from-devolving-into-war-and-maybe-ending reasons. except the vibes are... SO different. the vibes are “shit there’s like a dozen way way overpowered teenagers and twenty-something-year-olds who hold the fate of the world in their hands except they’re being dumb assess getting overly involved in personal drama with one another and are maybe going to blow up the planet.” and so instead of this quasi-religious worldwide honor around a single Seer and visions of the future that work one particular way and the main character being this poor fragile darling that needs to be protected and the reverence with which the plot treats the usage of future-powers, the main character of the opus series named herself “Fuck You” and has the power to see like ten seconds tops into the future and uses it to be really fucking good at magic fistfighting and accidentally gets involved in trying to take over a foreign/soon to be enemy government while trying to make friends with the ambassador that it’s her mission to protect him and like spy on that government to make sure they’re not messing with the future, but because he’s really pissed off at his ex and his shitty parents kind of for trying to force him to marry his ex and also his entire home country for siding with his ex he decides to take advantage of the fact that Saes thinks that overthrowing a government is maybe appropriate friend bonding activities to Take Revenge. and overthrow the government. meanwhile his cousin just outright admits in her second scene that she is trying to take over the first their government in then the world and is like 90% of the way there and really isn’t trying to hide the fact that she has committed to a plan that makes everyone think she is The Villain but Saes in particular bc Saes doesn’t want her home country to be conquered, but while Saes thinks this makes them moral enemies Asterna thinks that Saes is very hot because Saes is the single person who can beat her in a fistfight. they get into a misunderstanding fake-dating relationship for at ~80k words of the first arc. the ex is also trying to take over the government partially bc he feels the family pressure to continue their influence and partially bc he’s still in love with Luka and wants to try to win him back. at least three main characters have very poorly thought out one-night stands with other characters just for spite. there’s a character whose name is “Godkiller.” 

you can probably tell from the description that it’s very VERY different vibes from ifmlam. there are seers with more longreaching abilities than 10 seconds in the setting, who are trying to use their powers to seriously manipulate outcomes of events, and some deep political implications of that; it’s not all flashy ridiculousness. there are parts of it that get tragic (gods do parts of it get emotional and gods are some of those emotions tragic), but it’s never terribly tragic for very long, and it never feels like a heart-wrenching tragedy as a genre. everyone is a gay mess, extra emphasis on the gay AND the mess, and it reads like ridiculous action drama intrigue almost like a DnD campaign? 

and it’s because of both (a) the seer powers that are being highlighted work differently but also (b) the seer pov character has a fundamentally different perception of themselves. Aaron Burr sees himself as pretty much a McGuffin and he hates it and there’s a large portion of his character and character arc and hence the plot itself that revolves around him not feeling like he has any sort of control over his life or the impact of his powers. he’s afraid of himself and what he can do, he’s afraid of letting people in and being used, he’s afraid of the impact that he or someone wielding him might have on the world, and he doesn’t quite see himself as a person, more like a glass statue of one housing powers -- and that contributes to the tragedy and vastly affects the tone of the whole thing. when the viewpoint character feels helpless, when the viewpoint character doesn’t believe in themselves, when the viewpoint character is pretty much a McGuffin: incredibly powerful and useful to powerful people, but unable to control their own fate -- that gives the story a certain feeling.

Saes Imirin is nothing like Aaron Burr because Saes isn’t afraid of herself. Saes is completely at peace with what she can do, and actually thinks it’s pretty cool. She’s working for the people she’s working for because she’s decided that’s probably where she’ll do the least harm in the world, and also because she likes her apartment. if she changes her mind she changes her allegiance. she has stared down armies and has never really feared for herself, because she’s a fucking badass, and she knows that she can always pick the future where she wins so why should she ever feel afraid.

if you don’t want your characters to feel tragic, then don’t have them be afraid of themselves. don’t have them doubt themselves. but also, construct the way that future-seeing powers work so that they’re not set up to be a tragedy. the biggest being the most important pair of questions: how accurate/specific are the powers? and how unchangeable is the future?

Saes Imirin’s powers are 100% accurate and 100% specific, albeit contained to usually one to three but at most ten seconds. The future is also 100% changeable; the way her powers works is that she sees all possible futures and then physically moves the way that she did in the one where she’s won. Aaron Burr’s powers are..... death visions I’d put at, like.... 90sh % “accuracy”? in that they always show a possible and in fact usually most probable for the timeline we’re on now sort of death for someone. but they’re also very changeable. but time itself has a momentum and “pushes back” against those changes in the plot of ifmlam (someone doesn’t die in one duel will die in another, etc) which lends to a strong feeling of inevitability despite the relative amount of freedom those powers have. 

imo, future-seeing usually lends itself to tragedy when it’s about seeing something terrible/attempting to subvert something that cannot be fixed because it is the future. if you establish early on that all visions/prophecies must come true exactly, that will usually put a fair amount of tension on your plot and it will make things feel tragic, especially if characters end up getting a future that they really really don’t like. the more unchangeable things are, the more it usually tends towards tragedy.

(I say “usually” because, like. I’m still waiting for a story in which future-seeing is absolute and someone gets a prophecy that “and if you choose to go forward and step through this room your fate will be sealed, you will die on this specific day in this exact way and nothing in the universe can change that”, the character goes “cool”, does it, and promptly begins taking advantage of their immortality up until that day to do Utterly Ridiculous Things to become a weird hyper luck-based superhero of, like, “I can jump off this building bc in the vision I was fine and unhurt so I can’t get wounded in any sort of way that’ll make me unable to run and jump around” “I can totally try eating this mystery goo let’s see what it does” “hmmm the enemy fired their superbomb into the heart of our capital guess I just have to sit here next to it so that it will keep malfunctioning in some strange unspecified way and not going off because it can’t kill me here and now my fate is set in stone” etc. just. someone give me that comedy p l e a s e. I’m picturing Monty Python level of shenanigans.)

but yeah, usually, the more set in stone a future is, the more likely a story is to take a turn for the tragic, because when the future isn’t ~set in stone~ prophecies function more as useful warnings that can be interpreted to do useful things and save the day and not terrible foreboding omens of doom. high accuracy with high changeability is a cool superpower. low.... specificity, at least, leads to stories where usually you go “oH SHIIIIIT” afterwards as you get the end and the last thing clicks in place and now the entire plot in hindsight is So Much Different and they only lend themselves to tragedy if they’re useless as warnings and are just “fuck oh THAT’S what it meant and if I understood it I could have changed it”. and then inherent low changeability is both easiest to lend to tragedy and imo the hardest to write because you write yourself into a corner? (and you also make some pretty deep philosophical statements about determinism and free will depending on how you characterize time.) but so long as everyone has a chance to change things, the story won’t feel hopeless.

this has gotten long and rambly bc it’s ungodly o clock in the morning and, like, if the heart of the thesis of your story is “knowing the future is Fucked Up and Fucks You Up” and your story is on the deep seated societal implications about a world where some measure of seeing the future exists, like.... there are ways in which things might be tragic, but there are ways to counter that by making things mundane? a la lightening benders in legend of korra working at electricity plants. having seers with tiny mundane powers and/or who don’t really care about their powers and don’t use them too much or who just think of them as annoying side noise, but at the heart of it, oops stealing also from mob psycho 100 bc oops I just rewatched it and am mildly obsessed with it and its message and just dear gods how it manages to pull off its emotional impact....

psychic powers are just another trait. like people who can run fast or who study hard or sing really well or have strong body odor, or have psychic powers. they don’t make you any more special than anything else. who you are and what you do isn’t set in stone, it’s choices that you can make.

and finally, if your world is tragic bc you’ve decided to lean into the “the public perceives seers as special / dangerous / other “ and so you don’t want to adjust how the powers themselves work and how the public sees it, there’s always the trick of just, like.... let characters’ actions have meaning. let them win. and it won’t be a tragedy, not really.

[feebledungeons]

My group recently just doubled in size (we went from 3 players to 6) and this is the first or second time they'll be playing. I'm the DM because I was the only one who had played once before. How do I keep a campaign engaging and fun for everyone involved? I've been trying to encourage them to develop the backgrounds of their characters in hopes of working it in somehow. I also want it to be appropriately challenging, but not so hard that they would die the first time they play. Any advice?

Wow this is the oldest ask in my inbox so I’m sure that you’ve managed to work this out on your own and I’m sorry I didn’t get back to you sooner!

However, ask for D&D advice and you shall (eventually) receive!

Doubling in size from 3 to 6 must have been a bit of a culture shock, Nonny, but I’m sure you coped with it. I’ll be honest 6 is my maximum, and what I run with my regular groups, which are players I’ve known for years and who are all familiar with my table and each other. Normally, I’d recommend a group size of 4-5 but 6 is completely workable.

Hmmm there’s a few different things here so I’ll go through them point by point under the cut.

How to Keep a Large Group Engaged!

You do need to work just a little bit harder as a GM with a larger group so here’s some top tips for keeping the game engaging while juggling that many PCs.

1. Keep Cheat Sheets on your PCs

I keep a running cheatsheet of what’s going on for each PC. I’ll review these cheat sheets when planning adventures and encounters. They are usually formatted as so:

Details: Character full name (including any aliases), physical description and run down of pertinent facts like race, class, age, etc.

Emotional Hooks: What the Player has told me are their BEST and WORST memories or their WISHES and FEARS, alongside my own notes on what I think the PC’s motivations are.

Backstory: Brief bullet-pointed backstory with important NPCs highlighted (alongside their relationship to the PC and possible ideas for re-integration into the story)

Current Story: Brief list of important developments to the PC during the campaign (i.e. they fell in love with an NPC, they were seriously injured by a werewolf, they are now a vampire) and ideas for re-integration.

The Future: Any other notes or ideas on how to engage the player and what their turn-offs are. I.E. This Player loves tragic role-play but doesn’t want any romance elements OR this player has a major fear of spiders so keep them away from the PC, etc.

2. Get your Players to keep campaign notes. 

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: you’re doing a lot of work as the DM keeping the world straight, the players should be helping you by noting down the plot. 

This accomplishes two things: 

It makes sure that they’re keeping notes to remind themselves of their own decisions AND it allows you to see what they’re remembering and paying attention to so that you can tailor the campaign to their enjoyment.

If I could give DMs only one tip for running a long campaign, it’s this one. It has helped me SO much.

3. Make sure everyone gets equal time by becoming ruthless with your timekeeping. 

This is not easy. 

I have been known on occasion to set alarms on my phone to remind me to move on but with practice it gets easier to have a little voice in the back of your mind saying ‘we’ve spend enough time with the Elf, time to get back to what the Gnome was doing’ and you’ll be able to judge scene length just on instinct. 

Until you feel confident with that, set yourself alarms or simply say to your players: 

���OK we’ll start with X & Y, then move to what A, B & C want to do and finish up with Z before we take a little break. Remind me if the scene starts to drag.’ 

Don’t be afraid to ask your players for help with this.

4. Encouraging back-story building from your players. 

This one’s fairly easy. Ask them to send you their PC’s:

  Best memory

  Worst memory

  Secret wish

  Secret fear

This is genuinely all you need to start building out stuff that is going to help them engage with your story.

If they don’t do it, they don’t get their backstory re-incorporated. If only ONE of your players does this, you’ve already won. As soon as the other players see the fruits of their companion’s labours come to fruition in game, they will ALL want it and you’ll get through PAGES of backstory. 

Just get one on board and the others will follow.

5. Setting challenge. 

This is something I struggle with to this day. 

Generally, I am not a combat-heavy DM and I tend to focus on role-play over action so if there are any combat-savvy DMs out there that can help with the technicals, please step in. 

My main tactic is to google ‘good CR level for X players level Y’ and then probably throw in 2 more enemies that I can nerf, if needed. 

I also ALWAYS have a plan for each PC if they ‘die’. 

With Strahd, I have a mechanic built into the game where the player can choose to have their PC come back but as some kind of undead monstrosity and I add a side quest where they can gain back their mortality at some cost.

I hope that was helpful and sorry it took so long!

[katedrakeohd]

The softer side of Neville..

I had fun writing this for @sirbeepsalot and the #SofterSideofNeville prompt. I hope everyone likes it.

Word count: 4164..( it kind of got away from me. LOL)

Writer tags: @dcbbw @choicesarehard @jovialyouthmusic @ritachacha @tornbetween2loves @bobasheebaby

Warnings: None really, I guess you could rate it PG.

_______

_Masquerade_

A month after King Liam's coronation the Capital city was abuzz with preparations for the annual Harvest Festival. It was the last social event of the year where the Palace and grounds were open to the public. All over the city Cordonia's citizens were gathering their family's best recipes in hopes of winning the pie baking contest.

A week before the Masquerade Ball, costume designers and local stores were busy with shoppers looking for something special to wear. It was a black tie event and by invitation only. Rumors among gossip magazines, entertainment blogs, and social media outlets were flying with who among Hollywood's elite might be there.

In a menswear shop on Fenton Street, the Capital's posh upscale shopping district, Lord Neville Vancoeur and his friend Earl Rashad Domvalier were browsing through designer suits.

"Neville if you show up in another boring Armani suit it's hardly going to be a costume." Rashad scoffed.

Neville rolls his eyes, "No kidding. So this time I'm looking for some inspiration. If I'm going to be rubbing elbows with commoners, nobility and celebrities alike I want to look good. For the first time in decades, Cordonia has a young King who everyone wants to get to know."

Rashad was looking forward to seeing the ladies at the Ball. His father was anxious for him to find a wife and settle down, but Rashad wasn't quite ready for commitment just yet. He was more interested in finding a hot Hollywood girlfriend. He wasn't sure about Neville's romantic ambitions though, he'd never seen his friend successfully pick up a date at any one of these events.

"So Neville, do you have a theme in mind for your costume? A rakish, well dressed comic book supervillain perhaps? Or  something more from a classic movie character angle." Rashad wondered out loud as he looked through a rack of pinstriped dark suits.

Neville pauses from where he was looking at dress shirts, "Hey, that's not a bad idea."

"Which one?" Rashad raises an eyebrow.

"Either one. Hmmm, do you think I could pull off that dark grey pinstriped suit and that fedora as a gangster or something?"

Rashad narrows his eyes, trying to picture Neville as Al Capone or Elliot Ness from the Untouchables.

"Eh, I don't know. But that dark suit with a top hat would make you an excellent Penquin from DCs Batman."

Neville tilts his head, trying to picture it. "You know what? I like it. I wonder if they have a suit jacket with tails?"

As Neville walks over to the shop employee to ask, Rashad chuckles to himself. He could totally see Neville pulling off the dapper yet cunning Oswald Cobblepot.

Rashad frowned in thought. What could he wear to the Ball? He wanted to look handsome, not foolish. Checking out his reflection in the mirror he considered his dark features, piercing eyes and slim but athletic build. What heroic movie character could he fit into?  Spotting a black pair of suit pants and an embroidered white shirt on a rack behind him in the mirror, his eyes go wide when his mind clicks onto an idea.

Zorro. Oh my goodness why hadn't he thought about that before?

Spinning back around, his eyes searched the shop for clothing pieces he could put together.

At the Palace boutique, Hana, Madeleine, Riley and Olivia were looking through dresses for costume inspiration. Riley would be on Drake's arm and she had convinced him to wear a tuxedo. He had balked at the idea of dressing fancy but she had insisted. Now she was wondering what to wear to look nice next to him.

"No, no, no." Olivia protested. "None of these dresses are the right style." She had planned to wear a sexy vampire costume with a mask. She'd already had the mask custom made to fit her face, and none of the Palace dress offerings were good enough to go with it.

Hana and Riley both roll their eyes at Olivia's whining. Riley speaks up, "You must have something suitable at home then. I know how much you covet the color red."

Madeleine turns away from the rack she's looking at and folds her arms, sneering at Olivia. "Oh please, she'd look much better in something black to match her cold dead heart."

Olivia scowls at her, "You're one to talk. Why Liam chose you as Queen is beyond me. Oh look Maddy, here's an icy blue dress that would suit your cold heart too."

Hana smirks, "Oh would you two just let it go already."

Riley picks up on the 'Elsa' reference and bursts out laughing. Olivia and Madeleine both scowl at her, not getting the joke.

Still giggling, Riley tries to catch her breath. "So Hana, do you have a date for the Ball?"

Hana bites her lip, "Not really. But I'm assuming Maxwell will be without a date either, so he'll make do as a companion."

Olivia scoffs, "You two are both so foolishly cheerful most of the time you make a good pair. I'm assuming Riley is going to stumble around the dance floor with the oafish Mr. Walker."

Riley frowns, "Hey, we've been taking dance lessons. I'm sure Drake and I will manage just fine."

Olivia turns to leave the boutique, "Whatever you say. I have some calls to make to my favorite dress designer. Good luck Ladies."

The night of the Ball, Drake goes to Riley's room to pick her up. Stopping outside her door he tugs at the white collar of his dress shirt, trying to loosen the strangled sensation his black bowtie was causing around his neck. Sucking in a deep breath to calm his nerves, he lets it out slowly then knocks.

Standing at her mirror, Riley fixes her earring. She was wearing a long black satin gown that skimmed her curvy figure in places, and hugged it in others. It was cut low in the back, and dropped into a deep vee in the front. She hoped the ballroom wasn't going to be too chilly. On her face she wore a black lace cat mask. Her hair was in a partial updo, secured with a black sparkly clip, the rest of her hair falling in chestnut curls  against her shoulders. Her makeup was simple, so as not to be ruined by the mask, and she wore a bright red lipstick that matched her fingernails.

"Come in," she says when she hears Drake's knock.

Drake swings the door open, "I hope you're rea-.." Then his mind goes blank. Wow, she looked incredible. Turning around, Riley smirks at his dumbstruck expression. Walking over to him she straightens his tie.

"What's the matter Drake, cat got your tongue?"

The cat's got my everything tied up in knots at the moment, he thought.

Having her so close to him in that ridiculously sexy dress, those red lips of hers turned up in a sly grin, he felt warm all over. He needed to get control of himself, quickly, if he was going to lead her into the ballroom and not embarrass them both. Damnit she was still touching him, smoothing the lapels of his jacket...

Drake steps back, brushing her hands aside. "Ahem, enough fussing over me Brooks. I already feel like I'm dressed like one of the waiters."

Riley scoops up her clutch from the desk and then takes his arm.

"Nonsense Drake, you look very handsome, even if a tux isn't really much of a costume. Who are supposed to be?"

Drake leads her out of the door then closes it. He hadn't a clue what to say at first, but then glancing at the cat mask she was wearing he had a spark of inspiration.

"I'm Bruce Wayne."

A red carpet lolled out of the doors of the Palace like the long tongue of a snake. Flashbulbs of press photographers bombarded each limousine and sleek luxury car as it pulled up to eject its passengers.

Flocks of Nobles from all over Cordonia and Europe, Hollywood movie stars, and local dignitaries were arriving. Some wore elaborate costumes, some wore formal wear and masks, and some were just dressed in formal wear.

Neville and Rashad shared the backseat of a limousine. Waiting in a long line of other sleak automobiles, they were both getting impatient at the delay.

Rashad shifted in his seat again, adjusting his mask, every time he moved the sword he wore at his side rattled. Neville rolled his eyes at him and sighed.

"Seriously Rashad, the Palace security isn't going to let you into the Ball wearing that thing. Even if it is part of your costume."

Rashad looked over at Neville. With his top hat, monocle, and cane he looked like the dapper gentleman. He felt kind of foolish in his black mask, bolero hat and tall boots. But he had no doubts about who was going to catch more attention from the women. He wish he could have arrived on horseback since it suited his Spanish persona better. The press would have eaten it up.

Hana and Riley are standing next to a table of hors d'oeurves and sipping champagne. Drake had ditched Riley shortly after they made their grand entrance into the ballroom. When the camera flashes had gone off, Drake's body had stiffened and Riley had to keep a death grip on his arm to stop him from running away. Once he had spotted Hana at the hors d'oeurves table he escorted her that far and then made himself scarce. Riley didn't mind, because she knew these sort of events weren't his kind of thing, but she had made him promise to give her at least one waltz before the night was over.

The two ladies were oohing and aweing over the various costumes and trying to pick out the celebrities and nobles that they recognized.

Hana, in her flowered goddess of spring costume dress was getting plenty of looks of her own. With Riley's dark and sleek next to her sweet and ethereal they were the perfect picture of opposites. Yin and Yang.

Hana took a sip of her champagne and then gestured to a group of men standing across the room, nursing drinks and plates of food of their own.

"I can pick out Drake for sure, because for once his dressed up tuxedo looks casual compared to the other guys. But who is that guy in the tophat, tails and gloves? I don't recognize him."

Riley takes a moment to appreciate Drake in his tux, and then looks over the other men. She didn't know many of the noblemen at court, but she could pick out most of the Hollywood celebrities.

"I haven't a clue but the tall man in the bolero hat and boots looks like a tasty snack."

Hana takes in his costume and frowns. "He looks like a cross between a thief and a pirate. What is he dressed as?"

Riley takes a sip of her champagne and then smiles as she catches his eye from across the room. "He's not wearing the sword, but that is definitely a Zorro costume."

"What's a Zorro?" Hana asks.

"Not a what, a who. He stole from the rich and gave to the poor, sort of a Spanish version of Robin Hood." Riley says.

As the orchestra begins the first waltz of the evening, guests start pairing up. Drake stays rooted to his spot, there wasn't enough whiskey in him yet to attempt any dancing foolishness. The costumed  men next to him were openly debating which available women they wanted to proposition to be a dance partner. He eavesdropped on their conversation, waiting for the chance to defend the honour of Riley or Hana if they received any harsh comments.

Neville sipped his wine, and listened to Rashad talk about his options as he scanned the room himself.

"The dark haired vixen over there keeps looking at me." Rashad says, tipping his hat at Riley.

Drake frowns and then interrupts, "Actually I think she's wearing a cat mask."

Rashad smirks at Drake, "Oh believe me, I know a fox when I see one. Pardon me, I think I've found my first partner for the evening."

Before Drake can protest, Rashad weaves his way across the dancefloor and makes his way over to Hana and Riley.

Neville notices Drake's frown deepen as Rashad sweeps his cape to the side with a flourish, removes his hat and bows low to kiss Riley's hand.

"You seem to be interested in her as well, do you know her?" Neville says turning to Drake.

Drake tears his eyes away from Riley and Rashad, just realizing that the stranger next to him had asked him something.

"Huh? Oh yeah, I know her." Drake says, downing the last of his whiskey. 

When he looks back across the room he sees Hana standing by herself. Damn, that Zorro dickhead took her for a dance. He searches the crowd for his ridiculous hat, seeing them both on the far side of the room.

Neville gestures to Hana with his wine glass. "Well now that Rashad has claimed the girl in the black dress, why not take her for a spin instead? She is quite attractive."

Drake attempts to swallow the lump in his throat. He knew he couldn't keep up with the rest of the gentlemen dancers on the floor. He decides to spare Hana's toes from getting stomped on.

"Go ahead. She's a nice dancer. Her name is Hana by the way."

Neville grins, pulling off his hat and gloves and handing them to Drake. "I wouldn't mind at all, she does have a lovely smile. Here hold these will you?"

Drake is left alone at the bar, reluctantly holding Neville's things, as he strides over and approaches Hana. Looking down, he shoves the hat and gloves toward the bewildered bartender and then walks away.

Riley smiles up at Rashad as he whisks her across the dancefloor. He was an excellent dancer, even if she had to keep moving his hand off of her ass from time to time. He kept blaming it on the slippery nature of her gown, but she knew better. He held her against him a little too firmly at times as well, but she just went along with it. The dance wouldn't go on forever, and he was ridiculously charming. From time to time she spotted Hana dancing with someone as well. The dance steps of Hana's partner were more precise than romantic, and Riley wondered who he was. She'd lost sight of Drake entirely, and her scanning the room for him meant she often fell out of step with Rashad. He kept correcting her, and was losing his patience from her not following his lead.

Maxwell, carrying a plate of appetizers, finds Drake standing alone in the corridor between the ballroom and library. "Hey there Drake, I thought you came to this shindig with Riley?"

Drake sighs with exasperation. "Yes I know, but dancing isn't really my thing."

Maxwell looks hurt for a moment, since he was Drake and Riley's dance teacher, "But you were doing so well with your lessons."

"Dancing with Riley in private is one thing. But dancing with Riley with everyone else watching is something else." Drake replies, he really hated the idea of Riley dancing with somebody else, but he didn't want his own limitations to get in the way of her enjoying herself.

Maxwell pats him on the arm. "I understand buddy, big events like this can be overwhelming. But she's your date, and I know she would rather dance with you, squashed toes or not."

Drake nods, swiping the last shrimp canapé from Maxwell's plate and eating it. "You have a point. I promised her a dance afterall."

Maxwell smiles as Drake turns and walks back into the ballroom. "Go getter tiger."

As Drake makes his way through the crowd, he sees Liam talking with Madeleine nearby. Liam waves him over. Once he's within earshot Liam smiles and says, "So Drake, how are you enjoying the festivities so far?"

Drake shrugs, picking up a glass of  champagne from a passing server, "The food is tasty, but the drinks are better. So everything is fine."

Madeleine smirks, "High praise from Mr. Walker, so glad we're keeping you entertained."

Drake frowns at her and then downs his champagne. Stifling his burp with his fist. He feels amused at Madeleine's look of disgust.

Liam just shakes his head and grins. "So Drake are we going to see you on the floor during the upcoming Cordonian Waltz?"

Drake's eyebrows shoot up, and his eyes desperately search the crowd for Riley. "Uh, if I can find where my date has run off to sure!"

He breathes a sigh of relief when he sees Riley walking over to them. "Oh look there she is."

Drake smiles as Riley steps up to him and tucks her hand under his arm. "Good evening your Majesty, Countess Madeleine." she says with a curtsey.

Liam looks Riley over from top to toe and gives her a warm smile.

Madeleine quirks an eyebrow, taking in Riley's risque choice of dress. "Good evening Riley."

As the orchestra begins the opening notes of the Cordonian Waltz, Madeleine pats Liam on the arm to draw his attention away from Riley. "Uh sweetheart, shall we dance?"

Liam's face flushes slightly as she leads him away, "Oh certainly..."

Drake slips an arm around Riley's waist, feeling how thin her dress actually was, sweeping his hand over her hip he didn't feel any discernible undergarments. Leaning in he whispers in her ear, "Please tell me you're not naked under this dress."

Riley turns her face toward him, her lips a breath away from his. "Maybe, maybe not." she says.

Closing his eyes, Drake groans and then looks away. "You're trying to kill me aren't you?"

As Riley leads him onto the dancefloor she whispers, "You'd die a very happy man Drake."

As guests start pairing up again, Riley sees Hana being led onto the floor by Rashad, Penelope is in the arms of his friend.

Taking up the starting position Riley checks Drake's form, he seemed to be ok. "Ready?" she asks.

"Yup," he lied. Drake was terrified.

As they sweep through the first few steps without any problems, Drake feels his confidence rising. Maybe he could do this afterall.

They both stumble a little but manage to avoid eachother's toes, and the other dancers. Drake holds up his arm and watches Riley do her spin. He smiles and brings her in close, her back pressed up to his chest. As the music changes, Riley twirls out of his arms again. When she gives him a slight curtsey and then turns toward her next partner, Drake starts to panic. Oh crap! I forgot this was supposed to be a group thing.

Drake turns to accept his next partner. It's a woman in a bluish green costume dress, he guessed by the design and the sequins she was supposed to represent a mermaid. She flashes a dazzling white smile at him as he takes her hand, leading her through the same steps as he did Riley. He tries not to step on the hem of her sparkly dress as he goes through the motions. Her red curly hair kept whipping him in the face, and he clamps his mouth shut so he doesn't have to taste it too. When he raises her hand and she does her spin she giggles and nearly trips over her dress. He gasps and reaches out to grab her by the waist to steady her. When she leans in close and attempts to kiss him, he panics and pushes her away gently. "Uh sorry, but no thanks."

Looking at the other dancers around them, to see which move he was supposed to be doing, he carefully turns her around and after giving her a slight bow, hands her off to the next gentleman.

He takes a quick look around the room to see where Riley was. She was with a man he didn't recognize, but by her smile and blush she did seem to recognize him. Drake tries to ignore the person who was tapping him gently on the shoulder with a shrug. "Um Drake?"

He turns to see Hana, and then breathes a sigh of relief. "Oh thank God it's you. Please tell me this waltz ends soon."

He takes Hana's hand, not fighting her as she corrects his form and they go through the rest of the steps smoothly together. "Don't worry Drake," she says with a smile. "I should be your last partner."

Drake doesn't mind dancing with Hana, as she participated in Maxwell's dance lessons with him and Riley. She knew how to avoid his clumsy feet and smiled and nodded as he performed steps of a dance correctly. She was an excellent and patient teacher.

Drake smiles as she dances gracefully next to, and with him as the music ends. As he bows and she curtsies to end the waltz he's deeply relieved. "Thanks Hana. I'm so glad you didn't turn out to be another drunk mermaid."

Hana giggles and takes his arm as he leads her off the dance floor. "Oh my goodness Drake you poor thing."

Drake and Hana meet up with Riley, Rashad, Neville and Maxwell by the bar. Riley smiles and settles in next to Drake. He wraps his arm around her again, laying his hand on her hip. She wraps her arm behind him as well, tucking her thumb into his back pocket and cupping his ass cheek. Drake shoots her a warning look and she just smirks back at him with defiance.

Hana cozies up next to Maxwell, giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Rashad and Neville exchange a surprised glance, assuming they're standing with two couples. Rashad removes his hat and mask, raking his hands back through his hair to fix it. He smiles and extends his hand to Maxwell in greeting.

"Lord Beaumont can you properly introduce us to your friends? I know we've both danced with these lovely ladies tonight but didn't know they were friends of yours."

Maxwell laughs and then shakes Rashad's hand, "Oh I'm sorry, sure. This lovely goddess of spring next to me is Miss Hana Lee of Shanghai.  Hana meet Earl Rashad Domvalier."

Hana and Riley remove their masks. Hana smiles, "It's a pleasure to meet you Rashad."

Rashad smiles, bowing low and taking Hana's hand and kisses it. "The pleasure is all mine Miss Lee. You are a lovely dancer."

"Thankyou Rashad, you're too kind."

No he's not, thought Neville. He's a lecherous lothario and if you only knew, you'd probably want to wash that hand Miss Lee.

Rashad straightens back up again, and then smiles, patting Neville on the back.

"Oh where are my manners? Lord Maxwell, Miss Lee, this gentleman next to me is Lord Neville Vancoeur."

Neville nods and smiles, "It's a pleasure to meet you both. And who are your other friends Lord Maxwell?"

Maxwell turns and indicates Drake and Riley. "Oh this is Drake Walker and Riley..."

"Riley Brooks!" ... Neville's eyes go wide. "Oh my goodness I recognize you now. Those tabloid photos of you and Tariq didn't do you any favours did they? You're far lovelier looking in person."

Riley's smile falters, not sure how to respond. Drake's arm tightens around her protectively.

Neville's expression goes from one of surprise to being apologetic, "Oh don't worry I don't believe the trash in the tabloids."

He steps forward and gives her a slight bow. "It is a pleasure to meet you as well Miss Brooks, and from what I've read you're being sponsored by the Beaumonts, a most honorable house."

Riley smiles, relaxing a little, "Thankyou Lord.."

Neville smiles, "Oh please, just call me Neville."

Drake extends his hand in greeting, "Lord Neville."

Neville shakes it, "It's a pleasure to meet you as well Mr. Walker... Walker?..Why does that name sound familiar?"

Drake braces himself for some kind of commoner insult. But it doesn't happen.

"The son of Jackson Walker I presume?" Neville's smile widens, he keeps a hold of Drake's hand, placing his other hand on Drake's arm to extend his warm greeting.

Drake frowns slightly. "You knew my Father?"

Neville shakes his head, "No unfortunately, but it's an honour to shake the hand of the son of a National Hero."

Drake grins, feeling a mixture of pride and embarassment. He'd never been acknowledged that way before. "Th..thanks."

Neville lets go of his hand, still smiling. He turns toward the others in the group. "Well now that we're all acquainted, why don't we all celebrate with a round of drinks?"

Drake glances at Riley, raising an eyebrow. "Sure, why not?" She says with a smile.

Everyone turns back toward the bar.

"Bartender? Six whiskeys please." Drake says.

-- the end--

[berryunho]

why is that so complicated omg😭 i think it might depend on the school?? but each class is with 0.5 credits if it lasts a term, 1.0 if it's a full year course, and 0.25 if it's quarter of the term. i also have a designated amt of credits needed for my major and im free to use the rest wherever. ajwriog why are you doing an overload 😭 i couldnt even handle 5 last year so now im take 4 courses

that's so cool!! how did you learn korean? was it like classes then watching shows with subtitles or smth?

omg haha i did all my biostat/stat requirements last year and really both of them were review of each other... it was pretty funny. that is so true!!! we'll see how things go. the neuro courses offered seem so interesting even if i didnt minor in it, i'd still take them ugh

haha my campus buildings are like that too. today's so windy oml it's also 15/60 but with the wind and all its fucking freezing like NO stop it dfgklj

YES LMAOOOO that was me last night doing my assignment. i finally sat my ass down and read over the textbook sections and did practice problems before attempting and i've got most of it down

it's okay i write too much in my asks anyway oigjrog pen pal vibes right?@?#@

i'm going clubbing tmr with a friend it'll be a nice way to wrap up the week if i dont freeze my butt off outside !!! do you have any plans for the weekend?

-mightychondria

yeah i have no idea who made that system up it really does not make sense now that i tried to explain it 😭😭 yours makes a lot more sense omg lsdkjf;asld im taking an overload bc im so scared of not graduating in 4 years for some reason so i basically take as many as i think i can handle every semester 😭

hmmm well i seriously studied daily. for. twoish. years. using talktomeinkorean and i completed their entire course JFSKLDFJLKSD the later lessons definitely have faded completely from my memory but the more relevant daily grammar/vocab stuck w me and i attribute that SOLELY to being a kpop stan bc i literally hadnt studied in 5 years before like 3 weeks ago when school started 😭😭😭 rn i typically try to watch things w korean subtitles esp like. modern dramas bc all the speech is so easy and standard but i typically give up when it comes to kpop content bc yk these idols talk over each other and yell and dont speak in full sentences and switch up formality BUT ANYWAYS highly recommend talktomeinkorean they taught me everything i know LOL

yes i totally get that !! fr there are so many classes that i want to take and it makes me sad that i won't possibly be able to take all of them :']]

no SERIOUSLY it was basically the same weather here today like why was the wind like that ... smh ... but i saw more than one person sleeping outside just. on grass. in the middle of the day. so ig it wasnt so bad 😭😭

literally chem is so ... KFJDKFJDFJL i find the only way to really learn it is to try it and then figure out where you went wrong 😭😭 takes a while but at least you'll eventually get it hehe

hehe that'll be fun!!! but yeah hopefully its not too cold omg i swear going to the club when its like 50/10 and windy in your clubbing clothes is something i can only do like twice a year LKFJSDF:LJK hehe my friends and i are gonna go thrifting in preparation for halloween !! i think ...... im gonna dye my hair red for the ateez concerts so i might do it early if i can think of a good red-head costume hehe

have fun and be safe clubbing !! hehe :]

[iamjomarj]

It was a privilege to feature on @EntreprUnite Community TweetChat on Tuesday 22nd of January 2018.

@EntreprUnite: Tonight, we have @IamJomar_J here to have a chat with.

I'll begin with the questions, and I'll let you know when to fire your shots.

Good evening Mr. Jimoh @IamJomar_J welcome to the cool seat...

So quickly tell us about you.

#EntreprUnite

#OurworkNG

#LagosTwitterCommunity

Me: My full name is Jimoh Razaq. A project Manager, Business Man and also the CEO of Jomarjimoh Universal Company Ltd. A small but fast growing Project Management firm.

Alumnus of University of Ibadan from Guidance and Counselling department. Had a series of training from Servant Leadership (Self taught), IT Security Settings (Maret Communication), Civil Engineering (From RCC), Counselling Psychologist (CASSON), to Interior Design.

EntreprUnite: I see you're packed! That's awesome! So, tell us about JomarJimoh Universal Company Limited

Me: JomarJimoh Universal Company Limited started out as a small scale contractor in Interior Decorations. It became incorporated in 2017 by the Corporate Affairs Commission as a private limited company under Companies and Allied Matters Act,1990 and since then has diversified into mainstream Project Management and building construction. For the building owner/occupier, we give better value for money through thoughtful design and quality construction process. While focusing on exceeding client's expectations, we ensure quality and excellence in our projects. Our strong relationships with consultants who are professionals of the built environment have been a major boost in our drive to assist building owners in achieving their dreams of a comfortable shelter.

EntreprUnite: From guidance and counseling to interior decoration to project management and building construction, how did that happen? We are curious

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#LagosTwitterCommunity

Me: Actually I just find myself in Guidance and Counselling (which I later fall in love with). My first University admission was 2007 to statistics department, I had little challenges, something like too know (effect of young blood) on the journey and that changed everything for me, I manage to end everything around 2010 but due to my passion for education and my parent's support I had to go back but this time as a Distance Learning Student and that's how I found myself in Counselling department.

But as DL student, it gives me room to channel my energy to another thing, I started hanging out with people that are older than me in everything, learn from them, do one or two businesses together. Though am the type that love fine buildings with good structure and nice interior so I put all my attention into it. And with the help of my older friends - I used the opportunity to learn one or two things that do with buildings.

And I forget to mention am from Engineering family, my Dad is a Civil Engineer, Mom is a builder (not practicing though) so I can say I continue from where they can't reach.

EntreprUnite: Impressive! Will you say you are where you want to be now?

#EntreprUnite

#OurworkNG

#LagosTwitterCommunity

Me: Career Choice? Yes.

But in growth? No. I want to keep growing, because there's no end in learning and making money. 😁😁😁

EntreprUnite: Yeah we all want to make the money!

Your company has come a long way, we would be kidding ourselves to think it is easy. What kind of challenges have you faced along the line and how did you overcome?

#EntreprUnite

#OurworkNG

#LagosTwitterCommunity

Me: Hmmm. To say the truth, without a right plug and rightful business behaviour, this type of business can't go far.

When I first started, I did most of the work like for free just for me to get a portfolio. I make sure I gave my clients what they deserve and at the same time make my team are happy. Then, some facilitators are the one getting all the profit that am suppose to make but I keep on doing it.

Sometimes clients will refuse to pay for balance after the work, workers fight on site, injuries, accident, etc. But all in all, the positive attitude, word of encouragement to myself, and the goal I set keeps me going and never for once it cross my mind to give up.

And because of my attitude towards my boys, they don't mind whatever we face on site, they work with their soul, supportive and understanding. Without them, we can't be where we are today.

EntreprUnite: Beautiful!

Do you have a philosophy you live by?

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#OurworkNG

#LagosTwitterCommunity

Me: Sure... Let me list some

*Believe you can do it and go out with all your might to get what you deserve.

*Thy shall not dish out what you can't take.

*When am wrong I don't pass the blame around. I don't claim to know what I don't and it gives room for me to learn more.

*I say more of "thank you and I'm sorry".

*There is no second chance for first impression, so I don't try hard to satisfy people, but I always make sure they meet the calm part of me, the one that listening more with less talk.

*I don't spend money that I don't have. I don't buy what I don't need. I don't know how to save so I invest more. I read books. I laugh always. I don't sleep angry. I don't think about unnecessary stuff much.

*I always want more, I always push myself to grow, I don't give up.

*I don't date who I can't marry. I don't rush my judgement. And my no is no, no going back.

Thank you.

EntreprUnite: You don't date who you can't marry, a lot of guys out here need to take a cue from you.

So what is your 5year plan?

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#lagosTwittercommunity

Me: ☺️☺️☺️ Thanks

My 5years plan is to be in Forbes list of under 35 doing great for his nation. I want to be at the top.

EntreprUnite: Great!

We all want to be at the top. Any advice for up coming project managers?

#EntreprUnite

#OurworkNG

#LagosTwitterCommunity

Me: Prepare for the worst "I don't want to say the road is rough so it won't be a sign of discouragement (but it is) keep working and hoping for the best. Be of your best behaviour, make sure you find ways to always be part of people's thought, don't take part in any unnecessary drama because it will come back to hurt you. And above all be ready to be a Servant Leader.

EntreprUnite: That's the only way leadership can be effective.

So, are you married?

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#LagosTwitterCommunity

Me: No. I'm single

EntreprUnite: Hey Ladies get in here, we have a single Brother!

Are you searching?

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#OurworkNG

#LagosTwitterCommunity

Me: Seriously I don't know for now. I can say searching but there is no enough time for me to split yet, and so far I think that's one of the mistakes am making.

EntreprUnite: Oh wow... You, a CEO, you make mistakes too?

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