#no because he was literally like NO NOT BILL
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I have to admit this has been a bit of my thing since... like 1985-ish. Because I ran into the idea in a favorite story line.
It was made clear just how much damage a healer could inflict. The same power that could heal a bone could stretch one out into an alien configuration that couldn't work the same way anymore. The same power that could help with childbirth could make something otherwise incapable of survival thrive in spite of all the reasons it shouldn't. The same power that could trade away a wound from someone dying so they have a leg up to heal themselves can give that wound to someone who can't take it and dies of it instead. The same medicine that makes a heart beat reliably can burn it out. And "the horror of it," from the point of view of the healer, was that it was EASY.
It's partly why one of the creepier guys in Knights of Day is Doc Stevens. Great healer. Unless you're the cancer he's cutting out. Can literally heal the world a little bit. But that isn't so great for anything that calls the broken/sick parts home.
He's actually got a mention in H&M, Emma mentions that he gave her a clean bill of health. He's already Dink's doctor, too.
You're the healer of the group. The rest of the party has always treated you like you're made of glass. You were content to stay out of their way and let them do their thing. Until they all got downed leaving you the only one standing. That's when you show them how deadly healing magic can be.
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oki look im back on my "binghe and airplane are similar and i love it" bullshit
except this time i want these two whiny cut-throat bastards to run a cafe together
like binghe is the chef, obviously, and airplane handles the business side of things, and between the two of them, they absolutely make the cafe succeed through underhanded means
like
could they succeed as a business with just binghe's talents as a cook and qinghua handling the bills while the both of them charmed their way through customer service with their fake ass smiles? abso-fucking-lutely. but would they? oh no
qinghua is like releasing rats into the neighboring cafes and salting their sugar in espionage to make sure that everyone knows that the surrounding coffee is shit and the only place for Good Coffee is their cafe. he's making multiple alts online to just destroy their competition through online reviews and switching out the labels on dairy milk with non-dairy milk so that all the lactose intolerant customers are throwing fits on the regular because look, qinghua knows that a small lil cafe cant stand up to the big chain restaraunts, but he CAN destroy the reputation of all the closest chains to him like an absolute bastard
and oki, maybe binghe doesnt NEED to mansplain, manipulate, and manslaughter his way through everything, but gosh darnit, it's second nature to him. he is absolutely gonna hunt down any threats to their establishment and break their arms. and literally everyone who looks down on his establishment or leaves a bad review or otherwise gets in the path of his vengeance trail? loooookk, he cant be blamed for the way he smiled to their face while stabbing them in the back. they had it coming! they insulted his mothers lemon square recipe and thats an arm breaking offense oki
between the pair of them, they have the entire area quaking in confused fear. cuz okay, something i wanna talk about, the pair of them are two-faced and terrifying but like... 99% of people dont know that lmfao
(off topic but a personal pet peeve of mine is when fanfiction has characters immediately notice that binghe or qinghua are lying liars who lie. like "he smiled but it didnt meet his eyes etc" and im just guys. it's VERY established that the pair of them are VERY GOOD lying liars who lie. binghe's main character trait is that he can lie so convincingly that even shen yuan isn't always sure when he's sincere or not. and qinghua was literally a double agent for HOW LONG without getting caught? dude HAS to have a convincing fake smile. so all im saying is that people wouldnt immediately be able to see through that)
so like, yeah, all the bad luck and shit started happening when these two chuckle-fucks opened up a cafe in the area so like, logically it has to be SOMETHING to do with them but binghe and qinghua are literally the two most harmless and charming lil dudes ever? qinghua looks like a harmless pathetic hamster and binghe will thank you tearfully if you like his lemon squares and these two are literally the most wholesome and sweet business owners in the area so clearly they're not behind it
like i just need people to losing their minds a little bit because bingplane have gaslighted them all into submission like the evil cut-throat two-faced fuckers they are.
i honestly cant decide whats better tho. the pair of them having a drink after work together where the vibes are "lmfao we're so evil lets bask in our victory" glow OR the two of them actually only have a faint idea that the other is ALSO an asshole x'D
oki i think i lean toward the latter bc i think thats funnier.
like binghe doesnt pay much attention to airplane bc, as stated, airplane is a pathetic lil whining worm and he legitimately could not care if the twerp lived or died so long as the taxes are filed on time. but tbh, even then, he's competent enough that he doesnt /need/ qinghua around. it's just kinda convenient to keep him around. so mainly he's just apathetic and ambivalent to qinghua, but like, he does sorta notice because they spend so much time together that theres a distinctly... ratty quality to the dude. like, qinghua disappears for an hour and no less than five minutes after his return theres a roach infestation found in their closest competition? sus as fuck. and theres a little bit of a game recognizing game type of energy, but bc binghe could not be paid to care about qinghua's existence, he doesnt really look into it
similarly, qinghua is like 80% sure that pathetic crybaby of a chef is just that, but also, look, he's not dumb and the last three customers who insulted his lemon squares came back to the cafe in casts and binghe is a little too quick to turn off the customer service charm sometimes. and qinghua has basically decided "i actually really dont wanna know". ignorance is bliss, whatever level of psycho his coworker is, he honestly does not care so long as the crazy fuck continues to bake like a god. he absolutely 100% does not get paid enough to know whether his coworker is a serial killer and he also has the self preservation to understand that the less he knows, the better
so they both kinda have vague hints that the other is a two-faced motherfucker, but it's something that they figured out over time. there was no immediate meeting and "oh i know what you are" it was like "oki we've been working together for a year and yeah, im starting to think this guy isnt what he seems". slowburn them into realizing that they have similar personalities, if you will
now as tempting as it is to taking this au in a bingplane direction bc im ngl, i am multishipping trash, i am much more interested in slowburning this as a friendship. or like, grudging companionship LOL because also that gives the opportunity for:
"i just had to ask the worst person i know for love advice" shenanigans
followed by "the worst person i know gives good love advice, fuck" shenanigans
maybe they're having a drink and it's friendly and binghe kinda jsut wants to go home because again, he does not give a fuck about the fact that qinghua is alive, and qinghua also sorta wants to go home but they've both sorta committed to the "we're friendly coworkers" bit so here they are at a bar and trying to map out the Soonest Possible Good Time To Leave when binghe unthinkingly asks
"how do you get someones attention?" because he kinda ran out of pointless weather-related topics and it was on his mind and he really didnt expect qinghua to give him a half decent answer but then qinghua DOES and also knows who binghe's crush is and also is tactfully NOT saying that he knows who binghe's crush is with the casual "look, as an example, that specific person might like~" type of thing
havent decided on a binghe ship tbh lol. like bingyuan is obvious but also would be fun to do some bingliu or bingmo instead lmao maybe bingning? look im a happy multishipper and binghe is shippable with Many Characters. tho for the purposes of this freeform au thoughtless drabbling, the binghe ship doesnt actually matter so i'll keep it vague lol
the point is that qinghua gives really good fucking advice and binghe is just Not Ready for that because he's absolutely seen what a Nightmare scene it is when qinghua tries to flirt
which is somehow how the two segue into a relationship where they talk about flirting and love interests and that sort of shit in the most "we are two stereotypical gossiping middle school girls on the planet who are giggling and playing truth or dare about our crushes" type of way lmfao
because yeah, they're both cut-throat two-faced assholes, but they're also both utterly Weak in love
might be fun if they cycle through a few different failed crushes, but still kinda have fun at each others houses in like pillow forts with martinis that binghe made and gushing about "omg he was like so cute, did you see the way that he brushed me off? ahh imma die, so hot" because also they realize that they both share a Type. they are both absolutely into the Cold Beauty type, altho luckily they haven't crushed on the same person at the same time Yet, but like, it's only a matter of time okay and they know it and they are fully planning to Destroy the other when the time comes bc it's not bros before hoes for them, ohno, it's "to get that hoe, i will bury my bro in concrete" between them and they both lowkey know it LMFAO
and look, mobei jun did not ask to be the culmination of that particular building battle between them. he just came for coffee okay. what the fuck is happening. why is this is life now.
because okay when the pair of them were crushing on individuals who popped into the cafe or people they met outside, there wasnt any sense of urgency to it because they'd just shoot their shot and usually it wouldnt work out, well, it worked out for binghe whenever he went after chicks but he quickly figured out that he was like Cursed with "women simp after me" virus and while it can be flattering to have a simp, it really isnt fun to DATE a simp, ya know? so those relationships usually ended badly. qinghua just has no game with men or women lol
but see, when they realize that they're BOTH after the same guy, then theres the realization that if they fail, theres actually the chance the other one will Succeed and that would be Bad because then they'd have to see the object of their affections dating a coworker and NOPE NO CANT DO IT, WOULD MURDER HIM, I NEED TO GET THAT MAN JUST TO SPARE MY COWORKER FROM BEING MURDERED. THIS IS REALLY ALTRUISTIC OF ME ACTUALLY
so now they're just A LOT more persistent than they've ever been before lmfao they are pulling all the stops, they are using every weakness, they are ready to fucking WRECK the competition
maybe i should aim for a bingyuanmoshang ot4 endgame lmfao. mobei jun and shen yuan are just a happily married poly couple and shen yuan is having the time of his life laughing his ass off every time his husband comes home from the coffee shop like "i dont know whats going on but im scared and weirdly horny" and when bingplane realize that the solution is that mobei jun has two hands (and a very attractive husband), things calm down lmfao
or alternate route for this path, instead of them both thirsting after mobei jun, shang qinghua just has the most pathetic crush in the world, so luo binghe decides to have mercy on his coworker and be a wingman. only he Very Accidentally catches mobei jun's attention instead and now airplane is actually kinda lowkey ready to kill him bc he thinks that binghe snaked him but for once binghe is innocent! he didnt mean to do it! and it's moshang endgame when mobei jun gets over his crush on binghe and notices the angry hamster desperate for his attention
OR OR OR WAIT I THINK I THOUGHT OF THE VERSION I LIKE BEST
oki instead of bingplane actively seeking out love at every corner, what if they're just not. like they do bond over crushes and stuff but actually they're kinda too busy with the cafe and life and hobbies to really think about romance more than a "omg he was so cute~" kind of way. so neither of them notice when they have customers who are just Actively trying to ask them out
like mobei jun has been desperately trying to flirt with the oblivious barista for MONTHS now and he's actually dying because qinghua will just say shit like "wow you're literally the most handsome guy ive ever seen" but then brush him off when mobei jun tries to ask him out bc qinghua just assumes he isnt serious and he's busy with the expresso machine and he has no idea that this man is just PINING behind him while he sighs pathetically to binghe later abt "man it's fun having crushes but dont you just wish someone could like you instead?" and binghe just like "look im actually desirable, cannot relate"
thinking bingliu route for this version bc i feel like liu qingge is just a lot more fitting for Uselessly Pining After The Barista than shen yuan is lol. also his attempts at flirting are basically just picking fights with binghe and he always loses and binghe has absolutely no idea how far gone qingge is for him LMFAO
also now that i think about it, mobei jun should be kinda bad at flirting as well LOL so shang qinghua is like 90% sure that mobei jun sorta wants to kill him
bingplane having their weekly gossip sesh in a pillowfort like "man oki idk why they keep coming to the cafe if they hate us so much... but also man they make for good eye candy, if they werent such assholes, i could see having a crush" and then maybe a terrible game of truth or dare results in both of them daring each other to flirt with the Mean Eyecandy Man and now moliu are about to get Wrecked LMFAO
look basically i think that this sort of au could go in multiple very delicious directions but at the base, i just want evil comrades bingplane running a cafe together with all of the gap moe in the world LMFAO
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The complete lack of nuance on Reddit never ceases to astound me. Like I don’t know what I expect. Someone posted on the cat help subreddit because their cat was sick and their parents wouldn’t take it to the vet and the adults of Reddit literally started calling the kids work to try and get them fired and shit? Like this is ongoing. And the kids getting death threats and starts lashing out and everyone is like ohh he’s sooo evil for not taking his cat to the vet. While the cat is in the vet with a 5k vet bill in the next update and people are still berating him and calling him cold hearted and shit? Fellas it’s Christmas. My god. When it comes to animals people truly have no sense whatsoever
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Another weird GF dream 🤷♀️
So this dream was like a Total Drama AU. Bill was Chris and he brought everyone to this secluded island called Gravity Falls from a blue ferry. The contestants were Mabel, Dipper, Teen Stan and Ford, Wendy, Teen Soos, Robbie, Pacifica, Candy, and Grenda. It was kind of a mix between Total Drama and Squid Game. There was a lot of drama and fights going on, and Bill was manipulating EVERYTHING. He ends up being “redeemed” in the end though because Mabel learns about his past and offers to take him back home to California. He accepts, and all is well (but they still threw him into the ocean like in TD).
Also there was a lot of weird Dipper slander, idk why. I clearly remember this one line that said: “Why does your heart still beat?” Like DAMN Bill leave the kid alone 😭 (It wasn’t even said in like a curious manner, it was literally aggressively annoyed.)
#gravity falls#dipper pines#mabel pines#gravity falls au#stan pines#ford pines#wendy corduroy#robbie valentino#pacifica northwest#grenda grendinator#candy chiu#soos ramirez#bill cipher#total gravity au#weird dreams#i’m making this an au#just keeping this here for memory#hehe :3
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book eddie and bill DEFINITELY had a crush on eachother when they were kids and you can't convince me otherwise
#spoilers for ch2#when the eye thing got bill Eddie IMMEDIATELY ran towards it to let go of him#no because he was literally like NO NOT BILL#it book#it stephen king#eddie kaspbrak#bill denbrough#it chapter 2#it chapter two#reddie
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Continuation of this
#trying to write bills cipher in character is harder than it looks#I HAD to finish this comic but I have so many other things to do so now I gotta go do that#it’s nearly 1am help#my art#gravity falls#twins in time au#Stan pines#Stanley pines#bill cipher#I think the idea of bill weaponising Stans fear of losing his brother is so interesting a concept#especially because he literally does lose him in the future#baby Stan having to atone for the actions of his future self when he just wants his cool brother to like him#:((((
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A phone call between brothers (takes place AFTER this incident and Fiddleford's phone call)
Sorry if this is OOC!
#mama~ just killed a man~~#<- PLEASE get that reference#anyways- the lipgloss is popping and the girlies are slaying <3 (literally)#psychologically messing with the doomed narrative brothers just for the fucksies and the funsies#as per usual#been planning on this lore drop for a WHILE but got sidetracked- so here it is later than never#A brief insight on how Stan got roped into the whole mess and why Ford is so insistent on bringing Bill back#there's a little more to it like how Bill kinda acted like a parasite in Ford's brain?? and it latched onto his mind until he became#like codependant and INTEGRAL to his brain and whatnot#and then Ford killing him from his mindscape was basically the equivalent of him smashing the load bearing pillar of his mind with a#big ass hammer#sooo it left a GAPING hole where Bill used to be- making Ford believe Bill cursed him or did something to him during his last breaths as#revenge#(which Bill obviously didn't because he was busy DYING- altho it's completely fair of Ford to believe that of Bill- that narsty skank)#so he's trynna bring Bill back to figure that shit out- BUT also ALSO keep in mind that Ford is a leetol bit frazzled atm#he's not in his right mind- so he's making stupid decisions and stupid thoughts#anyways#gravity falls#gravity falls au#stanford pines#ford pines#grunkle ford#stanley pines#stan pines#grunkle stan#bill cipher#my art#my writing#HWINEBHABWNAJCAHOWEEATOWEUB AU#tw graphic descriptions
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Blood Blossom Au: Baby's First Commissioner Meeting :)
TL:DR This Post: Danny (orphan) gets poisoned with blood blossom extract by Vlad. He runs away from him and ends up under the care of one Pre-Robin Battinson Batman! Starry is loudly pushing her batdad agenda.
(Also known as "Late At Night, When The Nightingale Sings" on my ao3!)
This was a fun rough idea I've been sitting on for weeks, thinking about how Commissioner Gordon and Nightingale's first meeting might go.
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Commissioner Gordon likes to think that he's adjusting to the new normal of Gotham very well, -- the new normal being grown men running around dressed like bats, in military-grade strength body armor, committing acts of vigilantism, -- and slowly, little by little, he was no longer being surprised when this new normal pops up out of the shadows like the world's most terrifying daisy. His shaving lifespan thanks him for it.
....
The kid is a surprise though.
Granted, he seemed to be a surprise to the Bat too.
There's been a string of murders lately, -- which, in Gotham, is kind of like saying there's been another storm during monsoon season. And there's just been another; in some dilapidated building down in south Gotham, with the broken, boarded-up windows and mildew-crawling walls to match. The victim is a man in his thirties, multiple gunshot wounds to the chest, left in the center of the room for the blood to pool out around him.
The place is already secured when he arrives, the building swarmed with officers and the forensic detectives. The Bat emerges shortly after he does -- or, he might've been here the whole time, hiding someplace dark and shadowy. For his own sanity, Gordon doesn't think about it too hard.
The kid is a surprise, and he appears like a bolt of lightning.
He shows up in the middle of a conversation Gordon is having with the Bat.
A whistle, sharp and loud, slicing through the air, meant for open air rather than a confined space. Gordon's ears pierce and protest the sound, and the solemn, murmured chatter floating through the room abruptly cuts off like the swing of a gavel. As he turns towards the sound -- as they all do -- he swears, up and down, that he sees Batman's shoulders jump, just slightly.
At the source, perched on the window, is a boy. A boy in a gray-blue scarf and an oversized black hoodie, one that hangs off his frame and has ace bandages wrapped around the wrists in some attempt to cinch the sleeves. The hood is up, big like the rest of it, and threatens to swallow the upper half of the boy's face whole in the fabric. What upper half Gordon can see, is smeared with some kind of opaque, black face paint. He's holding onto the side of the frame with one hand, on his hip is a grappling hook. A familiar grappling hook.
Gordon has multiple questions, and his officers tense up.
Martinez puffs up, brows furrowing as his face shapes into a frown. Shoulders rolling back. "You can't be here, kid--"
The reaction is immediate, like a spark to gunpowder, the boy yanks his fingers from his mouth and his mouth twists into a scowl. Head snapping over to Officer Martinez, his hood manages to stay on but Gordon swears that as he bares his teeth, the glint makes them look sharper than they should be. His voice is rasp and quiet and harsh; snappish in its hissing; "Put a fuckin sock in it, Martinez. I'm not stayin."
Martinez reels back, and the boy immediately veers his attention off him. Like a switch, his demeanor drops. Despite half his face being covered, his mouth twists into a cringing, apologetic smile. Slanted and off-beat, embarrassed. It'd be disarming if this wasn't Gotham, and if he didn't just hiss at Martinez like he was about to bite his head off.
"Sorry." He whispers, voice deceptively polite and softer now. Gordon has to strain his ears to hear him. "I was looking for him."
He points his finger towards-- Gordon? No, Gordon follows the direction, and finds himself looking at -- the Bat.
The Bat, who always looks stiff as a pole, now looks even stiffer. Somehow. Well, the explains the grappling hook attached to the boy's waist.
"What are you doing here?" The Bat says, gruff and unable to completely smother the stumble of surprise in his tone.
The boy still holds a sheepish smile, and slips off the window ledge. His feet hit the creaky boards with a near-silent thud, the Batman finds his feet and rapidly begins crossing the room.
Gordon notes the slight tremble in the boy's legs as he straightens. He adjusts his scarf, which droops close to his knees now that he's standing, and slings a backpack -- how long has had that? -- off his shoulders. When the Bat reaches his side, he does as he always does, and looms over the boy like a spectre. A threatening mass of shadows cloaked in all-consuming black. Standing next to him, the boy looks teeny in comparison.
The Bat is a man who terrifies even the most hardened criminals, Gordon has seen grown men shiver in fear at the mention of his name. And yet when the boy looks up at him, he doesn't even flinch.
Instead, his sheepish smile melts away like ice under the sun, holding only traces of his previous embarrassment. It remains as a shadow on his face, a small upturn at the corners of his mouth. The boy pushes his hood back just enough to reveal glinting, ice-flint eyes surrounded in tar-black face paint. He holds the backpack up with one arm. "You forgot this."
#I have never seen Batman (2022) so really I'm just using battinson and crew as templates for my fic. but hey what else is new lol#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc#dpxdc crossover#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc fic#dpxdc au#dp x dc au#dpxdc fanfic#i dont know shit about detective work or true crime so forgive me for any bad terminology or incorrect procedure for how these things work#just a fun rough idea for how i imagined gordon's first meeting with nightingale goes LMAO. im sticking to the idea that danny doesn't#officially join the field for a *while* due to more than just health reasons. so his first appearances are brief and usually to give B smth#danny: im only here as express delivery for vader's little brother over there. yall stay safe tho.#bruce: *kill bill sirens bass-boosted* ohmygodwhatishedoinghere#batman: how did you get here... | danny: you have so many spare grappling hooks it was pr easy to just grab one and go#also danny is whispering on purpose because he doesn't have his ghost form to fall back on as a secret identity. so he *is* actually taking#extra steps to keep his identity safe. and people usually sound different when they're whispering. he also has personal beef with#office martinez despite the fact that they've never met. Danny's HEARD of his ass. he hATES his ass.#Martinez: *to batman* freak | danny: im going to Bite Him. | batman (reluctantly): hmr. please don't. | danny: im going for his shins#Martinez and Nightingale have this whole thing going on between the two of them. danny WILL slap a sticky note on Martinez's back that says#'asshole' on it and its the one spot square on his spine that martinez can't reach.#someone: why are you beefing with like. an actual 12 year old | martinez: HE'S A LITTLE RAT. THAT'S WHY. he's here to torment me#battinson: *did you grapple the whole way here* | danny: yah. it was kinda fun. i would've gotten here faster but i kept having to stop#battinson: *hnnn* im driving you back | danny:.. are you sure? | battinson already pulling him out of the room: y e s#i've been thinking about this for literally WEEKS. what did bruce forget? good question! i'll figure that out if or when i get to this#danny has Issues behind the word freak so its like a mini beserker button for him regardless of who the word is aimed at lol. lmao#martinez calls batman a freak once while nightingale is within range and its just the doom ost as danny simply Disappears from sight#like oops. you are now. In Danger. rip couldn't be me.#blood blossom au
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Meet the people of Woodward Ranch! To most West Virginians, the place is just a normal animal sanctuary, but to those in the know, it’s a cryptid conservation ranch :)
Wyatt Woodward is the grandson of the man who used to own the ranch (I haven’t figured out that guy yet so…). His grandfather passed and left the ranch to Wyatt in his will, despite Wyatt only having met the man once or twice when he was little. Now he’s tasked with running the place, as well as grappling with the reality that monsters, cryptids, and the supernatural are very very much real
Lucy Lovejoy is a farmhand / wrangler on the ranch. She grew up living there and is miffed that Wyatt was given ownership. She believes she’s entitled to it because she actually knows the place and Wyatt didn’t even believe in the supernatural until he came to the ranch
Dr. Herschel Finch is the ranch’s science boy (that’s probably not the official title) and he does his magic + science stuff to keep the ranch safe as well as be the resident cryptid expert. He’s very chaotic neutral and would probably kill someone…yknow…for science! Nobody really quite knows his history, despite him telling lots of strange backstories about his past.
Denny is a feral little orphan werewolf girl that lives on the ranch and has deemed it her home. She causes trouble for Wyatt because he’s easy to mess with, but she’s also the one (other than the Mothman) who sees him as family the fastest
The Mothman is one of the cryptids who regularly stays at the ranch. He was Wyatt’s grandfather’s favourite, and so Wyatt quickly becomes the new favourite of the Mothman. Just look at him 🥺 he’s so,,,🫶
Bonus:
Cryptoria is Finch’s ex-wife. Nobody on the ranch has actually met her, but Finch’s reasoning for why they got divorced was that “she was evil”. They question why he didn’t take that into account when marrying a literal demon, and also why that was the dealbreaker, seeing as he’s not one to be opposed to some evil from time to time, but he doesn’t elaborate. He does explain, however, that she tried to kill him. Despite that, he also actively laments the relationship, clearly missing his hot demon wife. Cryptoria divorced HIM because she found him annoying. They’re soooo toxic for each other. They’re the kind of exes that simultaneously hate each other but would totally make out again if they had the chance.
#doctorsiren#siren’s oc#woodward ranch#mothman#wyatt woodward#lucy lovejoy#dr herschel finch#denny#cryptoria#digital art#my art#oc art#procreate#finch and cryptoria are ‘me and the bad b I lost by being autistic (i was annoying)’ /silly#wyatt and mothman are very much like hiccup and toothless I’m realizing (this was an accident)#also yes finch is my favourite type of character: square autistic nerd man 😍😍#see. he’d be the type of guy to summon bill and build the portal and then learn his true intentions but go along with them because science!!#idk what species finch and lucy are quite yet haha still workin on those#but yeah these are some rough concepts I’ve been cookin the last few days#finch fumbled cryptoria so badly dude WTF you had a hot demon lady as your WIFE and you still messed it up#…okay well she did try to kill him but he was kind of into that-#the name cryptoria literally came to me in a dream#anyways YEAH some OCs! 🫶💥
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can I say something is this a safe space. it's kind of fascinating that ford is meant to read as a deeply repressed character and a capital s Scientist no less but he leads this other half of his life entirely dedicated to the occult. in the 70's-80's. like the historical connotations of the occult and what they represented in the united states at least seems kind of interesting in this context. for no reason in particular I find the dual aspects of "extremely dedicated to presenting as a logical, steadfast researcher trying to earn respect and social acceptance to the point of hinging all of his self worth on this vision for the future working out" and "deeply tied to the paranormal and "unsavory black magic" and everything Weird/freakish but feels like he needs to hide this aspect of himself from even the people closest to him" Very interesting. hiding six-fingered hands compulsively behind his back even if it's the emblem he puts on his journals. "what are you attracted to?" and "maybe you're simply attracted to things that hurt you" from two different points in the book. sweet dreams (are made of this) on the record player. hey does anyone know what that tarot card with a snake on it is meant to represent
#lab notes#utterly incomprehensible post sorry guys#and it drives me insaneeeee because people just don't talk about this aspect of him as a character. which like okay yeah makes sense#one half of the fandom would use it as shipping fuel and the other half probably don't want to think about it#but oh my godddddddddd oh my god. you could write psychology textbooks about this guy#to make it more obvious I think ford is not Just repressed about being gay and I think people go about it wrong#he is on some much weirder shit than internalized homophobia#and representing it through his falling in with occult studies/practices is fascinating to me#his 'the only way I can get what I want is if I sacrifice All my boundaries and autonomy' moment. real self-haters understand#[they start dragging me off stage] and do you ever think about how bill was literally a cult leader if we take the billville pages as canon
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Thinking about the "trilion and 12 years old" joke about Bill and thinking about his psychological development after the Euclydia massacre
In the show, we see that while he can plan ahead and manipulate people, he's often foiled by his own impulsiveness/anger/emotions. His ultimate goal is to escape the Nightmare Realm/Dimension 0. And sure, he says this is because he promised the Henchmaniacs he'd help them, but ultimately as others have pointed out, Bill is terrified of death. He wants to live forever - have "a party that never ends with a host who never dies". All he cares about is himself, his own survival and hedonism
All this to say, Bill has the emotional development of a teen. He hasn't gotten past the self-centredness nor the reward/adrenaline seeking behaviour, but has emotionally evolved enough to be able to manipulate people and such (and be able to feel guilt, even if it's just a picogram). Though his immaturity shows when he doesn't get his way.
One might think that, being a trillion years old, he would've developed a bit, but here's the thing - major traumas can "freeze" people at certain developmental stages. We don't know how old Bill was when Euclydia was destroyed - though considering his behaviour I would bet he was a teen.
(Or whatever the equivalent of that stage is for his species. They have exoskeletons- do they have instars then? Whatever, that's not on the topic of this post)
Seeing his entire dimension destroyed after (what was probably) a well-intentioned attempt to show them what he saw ("They'll see. They'll all see.") permanently emotionally stunted him. However it was he got his powers, he was a teen/young adult with powerful abilities who had just erased an entire dimension from existence and was now accountable to no one but himself while also being deeply traumatized. His constant partying and implied substance use were probably the only coping mechanisms he could think of, dissociating because he has no idea how to actually confront what happened. The way he talks about the massacre - he detaches himself from it yet still admits guilt ("A monster."). Only post-divorce does he implicate himself in the event, though still obscuring its true nature ("I liberated them.").
Being surrounded by individuals who are similarly maladjusted for most of his trillion-year lifespan certainly didn't help things. The Henchmaniacs are likely somewhat stunted as well, or at the very least don't offer much in the way of mature/emotionally adult conversation, especially since Bill reacts so poorly (read: homocidally) to any sense of malcontent.
Which is to say, I think part of why Ford was important to Bill was because, compared to him, Ford was more emotionally developed (Ford is emotionally stunted in his own ways, but not as severely as Bill IMO). Subconsciously, their relationship was reaching a hand out to the scared teenager in the centre of Bill's psyche and offering him someone to lean on- someone who had their shit a little bit more figured out. A kind of figure Bill hadn't had since he killed his parents.
Of course, such vulnerability probably felt so alien that Bill tried to distance himself. I always wondered - why didn't Bill just lie to Ford about his plan to take over Dimension 49'\ ? Ford would've believed him, finished the portal, and Bill's plan would've been fulfilled. Well, I think it was Bill trying to burn the emotional bridge. In his own impulsivity, his own desire to dissociate instead of confront, he would rather make sure that he would never be able to be vulnerable to Ford than fulfill his grand plan.
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I don't remember where I was going with this. There's no conclusion. I'm spinning this triangular multidimensional tyrant at physically impossible speeds in my mind and if I didn't write something about him my skull was going to turn into a fine powder. It's almost 2 AM, so it's entirely possible this post makes 0 sense, in which case feel free to inform me of that in the notes.
#for those in the audience who piss on the poor: i am NOT saying that bill is LITERALLY A TEENAGER nor am i saying he is 'mentally' a teen#im saying he has not psychologically progressed past concepts that are meant to be grappled with at that age#bill is still an adult. no matter how immaturely he behaves#if i see anyone in the notes turning this into shipcourse i am going to turn your spine into a lamp and use your skin as the shade#gravity falls#euclydia#bill cipher#ford pines#billford#not explicitly but you could read it as billford#i think there was some romance going on there. but idk when im tired im like 1000% more aromantic so i cant be arsed to consider romance rn#anyway bill is bpd coded and not because hes clingy. the impulsivity. the mood swings. the difficulty forming relationships. the sudden-#-hatred or love seemingly at random. keeping everyone at arms length so theres no risk of hurt.#though he also gives npd vibes. though ford is more strongly npd coded imo i mean like the inconsistent support from his family ???#bro was not getting outta there egotypical#brick wall
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Reading journal 3 again is a reminder that... Well Ford is kinda an asshole towards Fiddleford. It's not just Stan. Like he's so focused on himself and his project and his ambition that anyone/thing else blurs out (him disregarding Fiddleford's nervousness around the gremloblin because he wants to sketch it, and when it goes sideways, him talking about the safety of the project parts BEFORE how Fiddleford was doing in his journal, multiple times. Priorities much?) and he's demeaning towards Fiddleford's own project (which ends up being wayyyy more important then Ford's discoveries)... Like damn Fiddleford, u left ur wife and young son for this guy?
#gravity falls#ford pines#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddleford hadron mcgucket#ford squared#like... i get where reading the journal so its more of Ford unfiltered thoughts but it REALLY shows his priorities#and yeah I'm nor saying there wasnt good things in their relationship but Ford still is very much by this point extremely self-absorbed#and it SHOWS and its not... it bot very pretty. like we joke about Bill fumbling Ford and how great Ford is but like ..#compared to McGucket who earnestly cared Ford... was extremely self-absorbed and selfish. and like McGucket definitely#began to help Ford step out of his self-absorption and solely being driven by his ambition but in the end it ended terrribly#literally McGucket feeling so unsafe in the relationship and where he was that he made the memory gun and then USED IT UNCONSENTED on Ford#because he couldnt destroy it and Ford demanded him too... like yikes#anyways theyre all a fucking delight to chew on#this is not supposed to come off as ford squares disliking this is me going those two arent as wholesome as u might think when they were#younger. or maybe since im not a lurker in that part of the fandom i just have a poor conception of what its like compared to like. billford#like you can REALLY see what Bill likes in Ford#hugin rambles#hugin rambles gf
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The lack of media literalicy and victim blaming is really bad in this fandom when even the people who claim to love Ford so much are fucking victim blaming him
#ford pines#stanford pines#gravity falls#fuck it i AM main tagging this i HOPE you all see this#i genuinely hate this fandom this fandom coming back was a fucking mistake#and the Ford victim blaming somehow got EVEN worse after tbob#which is insane to me bcs tbob literally straight up SHOWS you how much Bill manipulated abused and tortured Ford#it's literally ALL OVER YOUR FACE#ya'd think this fandom would have sympathy for ford after we're shown every terrible thing bill did to him but noo#instead they go and victim blames him bcs they live in their own little made up gf where ford is this terrible selfish egotistical guy#whilst ignoring the fact he was an outcast his whole childhood abused and manipulated#and also that he wasn't like that until bill came around-#because they don't think it matters even tho it fucking does
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Yes I hate Stanford Pines with all my heart and it I ever met him it would be ON SIGHT. Yes, I am also writing a gay sex fic about him and the triangle...what about it.
#gravity falls#i literally despise him#i like him as a character but if he was real and i met him id fucking hate him#he would be so like...insidiously misogynistic#like im that way where you cant tell until its been completely normalized#also hed flex his ego all the time and i would HAVE to intentionally find ways to humble him#again i am writing a gay sex fic about him because i...as would many people...have a fucked up 1 night stand with him#but long term? Id kill him#tags are long winded sorry#stanford pines#ford pines#bill cipher#billford#my post
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hello gravity falls tumblr, someone write a fanfic where the pines family have to break bill out of rehab to help defeat a greater evil and my life is yours
#i need this so bad im going insane#make an ongoing gag where bill gets tazed whenever he does anything too evil please#i would write it myself but i don’t think i could in a way that makes sense and is entertaining simultaneously#plus i am NOT creative enough to think of someone more evil than bill#it just sounds like it would be a fun read yk#whenever something bad happebs they all just assume it was bill and bill has to fight for his life to prove it wasn’t so he doesn’t go back#imagine bill and stan as a duo#would literally die for that#imagine a plot point where bill HAS to possess someone and everyone argues on who it should be#none of them really want bill to be in their heads obvi so they just r like#nooo pick me its fine you guyss while really hoping they do NOT get picked#it was gonna be stan but bills to traumatized to go back there#soos was the one who gave them the idea to free bill just because#i need to stop abusing the tags on this app#bill cipher#gravity falls#stanford pines#dipper and mabel#stanley pines#fanfic#fanfic ideas#tiptoethewordsgo
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i honestly cant get mabel haters cuz like. you are literally being manipulated by bill to blame a 12yo for the thing he literally 100% caused
#like he literally manipulated her like on screen#multiple times too#and that scene in sock opera is literally bill trying manipulate dipper too btw#people who course correct and blame ford for this arent welcome here btw#like yeah its 100% more his fault than her#but thats because of the trust issues he has which‚ while arent JUST bill's fault‚ are far worse than they wouldve been without him#like half the post is in the tags oops lmao#gravity falls#gf#mabel pines#gravity falls mabel#mabel haters are weak and will not survive the winter#bill cipher#gravity falls bill#gravity falls bill cipher#bill#gf mabel
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