#no I haven't been working on this for a week and a half

[the--falling--titan]

fr like I was just sick for a week and a half. I haven't been sick this bad during a semester since middle school. now I'm in college. in middle school my teachers just waved away all the work I missed because I also had a lot of personal stuff going on and they felt bad for a depressed 13 year old kid with the flu.

unfortunately none of my professors feel bad enough for a depressed 19 year old with the flu to wave away all the work I missed

one of the most fucked up aspects of being an adult is really how life-goes-on everything is. like you can be dealing with the most fucked up trauma-drama-grief and still have to sleep and eat food to survive and like. poop. pooping while you're really sad shouldn't be a thing but it is. we don't have a say in the matter. life goes on

[starcandybby]

rings and realizations

haechan x reader

summary: while shopping with Jeno, Jaemin, and Renjun on a rare day off, Haechan lingers to long at the jewelry store which prompts questions and encouragement.

minors pls dni

warnings: shitty writing, reader is only in a flashback. reader has she/her pronouns, FLUFF, talks of marriage and engagements, 00z tease haechan but he takes it like a champ, haechan is referred to as donghyuck in this because I can, italics are flashbacks!

─────── ౨ৎ ─────── ౨ৎ ───────

It's a rare day off for Donghyuck. In between NCT Dream and 127 schedules, he'd be lucky to sleep in before practice. But an entire day off? Maybe once in a blue moon- and probably not even that often.

Donghyuck would have liked to spend the day with you- preferably in bed, maybe playing video games with you nestled between his legs. However, much to his dismay, when you heard Jeno, Jaemin, and Renjun invited Donghyuck to go shopping, you encouraged him to join them.

"Baby," Hyuck huffed, "I see them all the time. I don't need to go shopping with them."

"But, working with them is different! When was the last time you spent some quality time with them- without the pressure of cameras and practice and idol life?" You returned, soft but firm.

Donghyuck rolled his eyes, knowing you were 100% right. It is different spending time with his friends without the context of their jobs; it was more natural. He didn't feel like he had to embody the persona of Haechan from NCT. It was freeing. But, Donghyuck was also stubborn. What was so wrong about wanting to spend time with his girlfriend on a rare day off?

"Plus!" You continued, only encouraged by his eye-roll, "You've been so focused on 127 activities, you probably haven't seen them in a few weeks." A pause, "And, passing them in the company building doesn't count Hyuck." A soft smile graced your lips when you finished, letting him know that you were teasing him. If he really didn't want to go, you would drop the subject and welcome him with open arms on his day off.

"Yeah, yeah fine I'll go." You smile grew at your boyfriend’s response. "But! I get to sleep in, I want to have lunch and dinner together, and I want extra cuddles after dinner."

Your smile was extra wide now, causing the end of Donghyuck's lips to slightly turn up, unmasking his attempt at being serious.

"It's a deal!" And you sealed it with a kiss on his cheek.

So, here he was. At a luxury department store that was seemingly deserted when the four idols arrived. He suspects Jaemin and Renjun had a hand in that. He's half listening to the three discuss what stores they want to stop in; the other half of him is wondering which stores he'd like to stop in himself. Donghyuck isn't committed to a particularly style or brand; if he likes a piece, he'll buy it.

God, he misses you. And, at this moment, he really misses shopping with you, and how your eyes would light up when you really liked a clothing item on him or how you'd get all shy when he returned the compliments.

"Let's stop by Ferragamo first?" Renjun's question snaps Donghyuck out of his daydream. The younger one nodded and followed the three others.

-

Donghyuck hated to admit that you were right. (You always are). But spending time with his brothers felt good. There was no pressure; they could be themselves.

So far, Donghyuck had picked up a few things for himself- new glasses frames, a belt, and a new shirt. For you, he found a luxury purse and matching bracelets for you both. Anniversary gifts secured.

Now, the four men found themselves in Tiffany & Co. Jaemin had mentioned wanting to find some accessories for an upcoming event. While Renjun and Jaemin talk with the sales associate, Donghyuck decides to wander around the store.

He wasn't looking for anything in particular; he had enough jewelry at home and he's not sure Tiffany & Co is his style anyway. So, he just walks around the display cases to pass the time.

Donghyuck has seen so many diamond necklaces, bracelets, and earrings that they're all starting to blur together.

Until, he stumbles upon three display cases of rings.

He almost just walks by but something sturs in his chest seeing the diamond rings. A feeling that tells him to stop, even for just a second.

Donghyuck's eyes move over the rings, taking note of all the different cuts, sizes, and styles.

And he finally caves.

He lets himself imagine which ring would look best sitting on the finger of your left hand.

Which one would you like? What does your dream engagement ring look like?

You two had never discussed marriage or your weddings in depth. But, phrases like: "in our first home", "our kids" , and "when we're married" were not uncommon in such casual conversations about your futures.

Donghyuck was sure hopeful that you would say yes to his proposal, someday.

His eyes continued to move across the display cases, his brain analyzing what you might like or dislike about each ring. He doesn't even notice a faint shadow that appears next to him.

"Getting married soon are we?" Jeno asks smugly. Donghyuck need not to even look at the man to know the teasing smile he's sporting. He's too in his head right now to play along, so he ignores Jeno's question.

"Do you see any that you think she'll like?" He asks; voice coming through serious, almost as an attempt to mask any kind of vulnerability that might lie in it.

Thankfully, Jeno picks up Donghyuck's vocal queue and drops any teasing remarks he may have had prepared. He starts to assess the rings as closely as Donghyuck.

Jeno points out some rings that Donghyuck agrees you'll like. The latter continues to eye the pieces of jewelry while the former now observes his best friend.

Donghyuck. Engaged.

When Jeno first met you, first saw how you and his brother interacted, he knew you were it for him. He just didn't know that his friend was so serious about it so soon.

Soon? Well, you and Donghyuck have been dating for 2 years now, Jeno muses.

"Didn't know you were thinking about asking." Jeno tries to casually begin. He wants Donghyuck to be honest, but he doesn't want to broach the topic too seriously for his best friend to close off.

"I wasn't but I am now." Donghyuck absentmindedly answers, eyes still trained on the rings. But, Jeno doesn't miss the way his eyebrows pinch together and how his fingers can't seem to stay still, always fidgeting in some way.

"How soon?" Jeno continues.

"Not yet." Donghyuck replies.

A moment passes, and another.

"But soon."

Jeno's lips curl up at that. And this is his queue to shift to a more teasing tone.

"Our Hyuckie is getting married!" He shakes Donghyuck's shoulders, finally pulling him away from staring down Tiffany's many rings.

Donghyuck rolls his eyes and shakes Jeno off him, "And you're not going to be the best man so don't even ask."

Jeno feigns shock, "If I beg to Y/N, she'll make you make me the best man."

"I can resist her no problem."

To this Jeno howls in laughter, catching the attention of the other two as they make their way over, shopping bags in hand.

"What's so funny?" Renjun asks, eyebrows raised at Jeno.

“Hyuck just said he can resist Y/N!” Jeno said; words paired with a teasing smile.

"Ah! You're funny." Jaemin lightly slaps Donghyuck's arms, in which he rolls his eyes and freigns annoyance.

But, it's Renjun who notices the merchandise before them, making the connection quite quickly.

"Are you proposing to Y/N?!" Renjun asks, holding a tone of surprise, yet excitement.

Donghyuck feels too shy to confirm Renjun's suspicions confidently. But, his bashful smile and avoidance of eye contact tells the older brother all he needs to know.

"Are you serious?" It's Jaemin's turn to become excited, eyes sparkling at the thought of Donghyuck getting married, to you no less.

The fiancé-to-be nods and rubs the back of his neck.

"It's seriously no big deal. Plus, it won't even happen for a while. I want to wait until everything calms down. So no need to get all excited..." Donghyuck says sternly. But his brothers know better.

As he was rambling, Renjun, Jaemin, and Jeno's smiles only grew. Donghyuck is nervous. They're sure they can count the number of times they've seen him this nervous on one hand.

"Okay, okay. We get it. We'll leave it alone." Renjun lets it go for Donghyuck's sake and starts to lead the group out of the store.

Jeno and Donghyuck trail behind the other two. The older one can't help but get one last comment in:

"She'll say yes, you know?"

To this, Donghyuck doesn't say anything. But, Jeno doesn't miss the blush that blooms on his cheeks.

─────── ౨ৎ ─────── ౨ৎ ───────

disclaimer: This is purely fiction- nothing in these works reflect real of these people.

a/n: ahhh thank you for reading! I'm in my hyuck feels as always. I wanted to write something small to get me back into writing a little bit. likes, reblogs, and comments are always always appreciated <3

[weirdgenetic-fuckup]

Dom current slash smut please🙏

A/n: This is kind of short and I had better ideas for this but got tired half way through so I apologize

Warnings: Smut, riding, sweet to rough sex, if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!

After a long day of work all you wanted to do was curl up in bed and sleep for a week, but Slash had other plans to help you destress.

With his hands planted firmly on your hips he guided you up and down his cock as he leaned back against the bedframe. "That's a good girl, taking me so good... fuck, just like that." He praised.

You were straddling his lap, arms wrapped around his neck while he moved you nice and slow. You'd pictured a relaxed night of cuddles and kisses, this was much better. His cock stretched you out so good, veins dragging against your gummy walls while his tip repeatedly hit that spot that made your vision go white.

Your eyes fluttered shut, lips parting in moans. "That's it, just let me make you feel good." He purred, leaning closer to kiss up your neck. You tilted your head to the side to give him more access, a hand lacing through his hair and holding him there.

He began rolling his hips up into yours, only making your moans louder but it didn't matter since it was just the two of you at home. "Fuck, Slash... just like that." You mumbled, he liked when you thought you had some control. He was moving you, he was fucking you on his cock, you were just there to be his fleshlight.

"I know, sweetheart, I know exactly what you want, just take it." He answered, hot breath fanning over your neck as he started moving faster. Your breathing picked up with his pace, grip on him tightening.

Your moans fell right onto his ears, his favourite sound. His hold on your hips grew tighter as well, forcing you down on his cock harder to make you whine. He sucked on your neck, nipping at the sensitive spots that made your nails dig into his shoulder.

Your hips bucked helplessly, aching for more but you were already pulsing around him. "You can touch yourself, sweetheart." He assured, lips travelling up, caressing the shell of your ear. "Had a bad day, deserve everything you want." You didn't have to be told twice, hand already slipping between you two, fingers finding your clit and rubbing yourself nice and slow, mismatching with his pace completely.

"Ah! Oh fuck, Slash, I-I can't- can I- can I cum? Please, I've been such a good girl." You pleaded, to which he chuckled at.

"Been a very good girl, haven't you?" He said, pulling away to look at you. His own face was flushed, chest rising and falling rapidly, the slight jiggle of his tits every time he moved you. You gawked but you knew it was taking a lot for him to not focus only on your chest, to throw you on your knees and fuck your own tits. "Think you deserve to cum on me? What about my day?"

You raised a brow at him. "Your day?" You asked softly, hand sputtering in its movements on your clit.

"My day, sweetheart." He said, lifting you up and laying you down on your back. "My day was great until you came home sulking." He said through gritted teeth, his thrusts getting rougher. He held your hips in place now, pinning them to the bed. "Could've used a good girl to make me feel good, gotta break you down a little." Your breathing got heavier, you loved when he was sweet with you, but getting to end your day like this wasn't so bad.

[the---hermit]

28|04|2025

First day of the second half of this semester. I am not ready for it to start again. Depression has been kicking my butt, and I am honestly scared about what more responsibilities will do to me at this moment. I originally planned to start studying during my break, which I did not because I needed all the rest I could get, but I don't feel really rested at all. I should probably try to get back into a new study routine slowly, but I don't really have a plan yet. What I know now is that I have lectures to go to in person, which is going to take a lot of energies out of me, and I also have a book to read and study for the same class. I haven't got my materials for the other class I plan to work on in the next couple of months so I need to get them. I should also email professors who have not gotten back to me in these weeks, but for that I might wait a few days or even next week. I really need to force myself to do one thing at the time, and not load myself with too many unfinished tasks, or else that will surely get me overwhelmed.

things on my to-do list:

general to do list for the week

pack my school backpack

check and fix the notes I took during the last lecture of the first half of the semester since I have not done that yet

download the online materials regarding that lecture

look for the materials for the other exam

water the plants in my study

duolingo

text my therapist since due to holidays and stuff we couldn't schedule a forthnightly appointment as usual

commute + go to lecture

[abysskeeper]

Trick, mistake, secret and skin

This 100% did not start with me thinking Trick was one of the words

Yeah ok, my secret is that I'm always on my bullshit about Trick too. Another readmore because I uh...always always ramble hard about my girl.

skin: How comfortable is your OC in their skin? Do they grapple with anything that lives inside them—a beast, a curse, a failure, a monster? How do they face the smallest, weakest, most horrible version of themself? Are they able to acknowledge it at all?

So, the key to writing Trick in any way, shape, or form is that she is, 99.9% of the time, never comfortable in her own skin and always contending with some type of monster writhing beneath her skin. Is she confident and capable in her abilities? Yes. Willing to lead and make the tough decisions? Yes. Self-assured and secure in who she is? No, never.

Is it a contradiction in a lot of ways? Yes, but the girl's a mess of martyr complexes and insecurities. She almost always, honestly believes she is the most horrible version of herself (a coward and a monster), and though she would only call herself as such in a conversation where it's directly referenced, she never denies the accusation and does all she can with her actions to try and make up for her perceived shortcomings. In reality, the worst version of herself is the girl who gave up for a time (there's usually some point in her history where she went selectively mute and actively tried to kill herself), and in that regard, Trick often pretends that girl actually succeeded. She rarely acknowledges that time existed, ashamed as she is by it, and on the rare chance it does come up...well, the ensuing conversation isn't pretty.

As for the monsters beneath her skin, it varies by verse, but she's usually contending with some type of darkness or beast that's a thinly veiled allegory for her rage, desperation, and trauma (because I'm like that). A few examples, in no particular order:

Pack-verse: In Trick's original universe (a dystopian urban fantasy/sci-fi mashup), she's a wolf shapeshifter who was experimented on as a kid, which ultimately resulted in the line between human and beast blurring within her. Meaning, she has a tendency to go partial-to-full werewolf when deeply upset, among other differences (improved senses, heightened instincts and reflexes, etc). She's terrified of her capabilities and tries to repress herself as much as possible, which only backfires. The whole character arc there is about her coming to terms with who she is and what happened to her, and accepting that that side of her (the rage, the desperation, the trauma) is not actually a bad thing (and is actually more heightened because of her human choices, not the animalistic ones).

SWTOR: I took the Jedi Consular story and ran with it. The effects of the Force plague linger after chapter 1, even after Morrhage is defeated. I figured that lending out your soul to protect fellow Jedi against a Dark plague probably means you don't get everything back properly, even if you did everything right. She doesn't suffer from corruption so much (I actually believe she's not corruptible because she learned the shielding technique), but she's almost constantly, subconsciously using the shielding technique on herself to battle off the bit of Darkness she inherited from those she shielded. Other parts of her are missing altogether. It causes her a lot of chronic pain, but over time she learns to deal with it...until chapter 3 when she secretly starts shielding the Children and accidentally inherits some of the Emperor's power. KOTFE and KOTET are the worst time of her life, and she never knew so much relief as when the Emperor finally died in EOO.

BG3: My new project and current brainrot. Trick's issues are a little different here, as she's dealing with divinity instead of darkness (her backstory fic I'm working on is literally subtitled "You've Been Touched by Something Holy"). Instead of dealing with darkness, she's dealing with the fact she's literally been touched by the God of Death and bares the scars (both physical and emotional. I'm using this as an excuse to finally make this a valid design and not just metaphorical) that set her apart from her peers. It's still very much a metaphor for her rage and grief, but has a new and exciting flavor that I'm still working out all the kinks of.

secret: What's one secret your OC never wants anyone to know about them?

Again, depends on verse, but Trick always has at least one, world shattering secret she's keeping to herself. Generally, no matter in what iteration, there are deaths in her past she doesn't want anyone knowing about. The numbers and her exact involvement often vary, but she always feels a sense of guilt for people she either directly or indirectly killed through her actions and/or inactions. Otherwise:

Pack-verse: Her primary secret she wishes no one knew is, exactly, the number of people she's been responsible for killing as an agent of the government. However, that isn't a secret she can hide, as most people know and/or remember her committing those crimes. Instead, the secret she's trying most to hide is the aforementioned experimentation and ensuing consequences. She doesn't want anyone to know just how monstrous she really is, and how utterly disgusted she constantly feels about herself.

SWTOR: She tries to take the fact she was born an Imperial slave to the grave, but it does come out eventually to the Republic or Alliance. Instead, the one thing she will take to the grave is what happened to her as a result of the shielding technique. She'll never speak a word about the non-corruption corruption (thus, she'll never ask for help) because she fears how people will view her or treat her if they ever knew. The only exception is Cipher Nine, sometimes, but that man can and will both take a secret to the grave and never once consider betraying her trust.

BG3: The fact she died and was resurrected by a God. It's kind of hard to avoid in full, given the golden scarring is a dead giveaway of something divine happening to her, but she doesn't easily share the full story. And having died and being resurrected stands in direct contrast to being a cleric (and unrealized Chosen) of Kelemvor, nevermind the fact it was Kelemvor who asked her to live and resurrected her in the first place. It's complicated.

mistake: What's the worst mistake your OC ever made? What led to them making it? Have they been able to fix it? How have they moved on?

Trusting Torren, in every verse. The worst mistake she ever made is trusting her...ex? Abuser? Mirror image and narrative foil? All of the above?

Regardless, Torren is always her worst mistake. She tried so hard to fix him, but he was one of those people who couldn't be helped, and did nothing but manipulate and use her further because of her goodwill. People got hurt and died because of it, no matter the verse. She got hurt (usually assaulted), no matter the verse. Torren is always the worst mistake, no matter what, and the only reason she ever trusted him was because she was young and naive and just wanted to help.

Usually Trick rectifies it by, eventually, killing him. It's the only way she feels like she can rectify everything he's done (to her and to others), and it is her burden to bare alone (though sometimes Tav insists on doing the honors). Even after he's dead though, it takes a long time for her to move on from everything that happened. When she has Tav, he usually helps facilitate her moving on quicker, but she can get there on her own with enough time away from the situation and a metric fuckton of painful self-reflection.

[forgettable-au]

The comic is coming back this week! WOHOO

Start of chapter 2!! Yayy!

[yoonia]

I don't share a lot of personal stuff lately unless it's related to my cats or work (lol) but I just want to share that for the past few months, I've been struggling as I'm taking care of 7 (yes, seven) sickly kittens. We've lost three over the course of 3 months since last December, and last night, we just lost another one due to a virus outbreak, with two others (Mai and Robbie) still dealing with cold and fever from a bacterial infection.

If you enjoy my writing and would be interested in helping me out with the piling vet bills (as I'm also looking into getting the remaining kittens vaccinated soon), you can drop some love and donate the funds through my ko-fi page. Any amount of help will be much appreciated!

You can also take a peek at my shops (1, 2) if you'd like. There's not much on there yet, but I'm selling the worksheets that I shared through my Patreon writing class for beginner writers who are looking to practice how to start writing a story/novel.

Thank you in advance and I'm so sorry for sharing such a dreary update :(

[july-19th-club]

i have no mouth and i must scream speech but for about insomnia hate hate hate let me tell you how much i have come to hate being awake

[alchemistc]

Gave myself a sort of day off yesterday for the first time in almost three weeks and I cannot tell you how much I regret it. My body hurts, I don't want to get out of bed, everything is awful.

[the-zephyr-zone]

👀

[hannie-dul-set]

latest nabi moment. it's 4:23am. good fucking night.

[joyridingmp3]

tomorrow plan: seduce rego man into giving me another $30 pink slip because i am so poor i will have literally $2 to my name if he does. and then charm my mother into giving me free drugs. 🤞 love being a libra.

[wewontbesleeping]

tomorrow is going to be such a long day and it's also going to be sooo fucking cold. idk how i'm going to handle it!!!

[guinevereslancelot]

snow!!! 🤯

[mostlyihyperfixate]

I have decided I'm gonna just have to put down Spirit of Justice and play Investigations first. If I can't get into my tags without spoiling myself, how will I know when new fanfics get posted???????

But not tonight. I am exhausted, and also weirdly committed to making mundane things I've been looking forward to ~~~special~~~, so it's gonna have to wait until I have access to a bathtub again--or at least until I have had a good night's sleep.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

mordecai is the first funny bitch like spends 90% of his time literally just standing there going "i'm dapressed" to himself while everyone in the vicinity takes potshots and then he's clocking in for the night shift where for the next 9 hours people go "god mordecai would it kill you to act like you're having more fun at the [kills you] factory"