#nine's done already eek

[angelmichelangelo]

on my hands and knees give us more crumbs from your human au pls

AH thank you!! im so glad you’re interested because it’s all that’s basically been on my mind for the longest time now :’) im up to like 38k words now? im currently working on chapter nine :] there’s still some big plot beats i still gotta work through but im very much excited to get round to it :)

i still kinda flip flop on the whole thing just cos. it’s got some pretty heavy themes. i know that’s not everyone’s thing when it comes to reading fic and i totally get that but it’s still pretty scary putting that out into the world, not wanting to feel,, idk judged in a way? writing this fic has been super cathartic in a sense. plus, sometimes darker themes are a way to kind of expand how you write — not everything is sunshine and puppies all the time and i quite like a bit of heavy hurt/comfort so yeah! hopefully other people enjoy it in that sense but it’s still a bit. EEK having to think about other people eventually reading it lol

here’s an little sneak peak, fair warning it IS angsty and unedited lol but hopefully you enjoy :D thanks again for your enthusiasm on this, it’s so super appreciated !!

x

He returns home before Raph and Alopex do, drowned out by the rain, it’s still not nearly enough to wash away the thousands of sins that seem to burn hotly against his skin as he’s reminded of what he had done with each step towards home.

He’d done so much for so little. He’d pushed and pushed, teetering until his toes were balancing over the edge. He’d let someone like Hun get right under his skin and latch on like a parasite.

He heads for the shower to drown away more of the mistakes he’d made so far.

When he’s finished scrubbing his skin almost red raw, he stands in the middle of the boxy little room, dripping wet, he reaches a hand out and swipes it through the condensation that clings to the mirror, revealing his sad little face from beneath it.

Ms Katri had told him once with a lot of conviction that most older people carry, that he was a frightfully handsome young man. Leo used to say it all the time too when they were little, tracing his fingers over the lighter patches of his skin over the bridge of his nose, telling him that each one was a kiss from an angel, because that was where he’d come from.

He wasn’t spat from his mother’s womb on a cold, dirtied kitchen floor. He wasn’t a child unloved and unwanted by a mother that bore the same sickness he’d inherited from her all these years later.

To Leo and to his brothers, his existence was still, somehow, supposedly a blessing.

His cheeks are drawn in and hollow, his eyes empty and dark. His hair is limp and untended to and looking past the bruises that still wrap around his skull and the red raised line that cuts through his bottom lip, looking back at the boy in the reflection, he can spot a thousand wounds and scars that he’s already had to carry in just nineteen, short, dreadful years.

It doesn’t feel like much of a blessing. It feels very much like a curse.

[pearlzier]

okay i Lied, i’m Not faceless, it was actually Me who sent beau + puppygirl!gf😧 i just got scared to send it like.. Not on anon, cus i just never know how ppl will react to certain things and i get nervy, but like i also trusted in a way that You Would Get It, and you Do so i’m not nervy anymore😸🤞🏼

i definitely have plans to write abt this (maybe multiple parts, idk yet) but it’s just been Eating away at me for awhile now and i can’t keep these thoughts in or i’ll explode and die so i’m glad you’re in the brainrot with me now. i may or may not also make a bot, who knows.. i’m already planning a couple sling themed ones with beau (cus my beau sling coded brainrot also goes crazy)

anyways, MORE BEAU AND HIS PUPPYGIRL THOUGHTS!!!!!

she definitely gets excited every time they go to the store and see Anything relating to any of her hyperfixations. like beau literally can’t even let her go to the store by herself anymore cus she has absolutely zero impulse control and will buy All of it and go broke.

irdk what is and isn’t okay for me to say here in regards to nswf things so i’ll keep those to myself for the moment

she Absolutely is texting beau while she’s getting her nails done and asking him what colors she should get. one time she got a cute cowboy/sheriff themed set for him (like cowboy hat, longhorn skull, belt buckle, badge, the whole nine) and he tweaked tf out.

CAR RIDES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i can go into My More Specific Details on this, but it mostly speaks for itself.. just- CAR RIDES💗💗

she made him buy a small outside couch for the deck of the trailer so they could cuddle more easily when they watch movies, and she’s Definitely laying there curled up with her head in his lap while he plays with her hair…. and she ends up falling asleep only a few minutes into the movie like Almost every time, cus her hair is a weak spot and he has Magic Hands.

she’s one to wear the frolicking in a flower field at 4:00 dresses with stomp a hoe at 5:00 big chunky platform boots combo (has the black demonia camel-311’s to match beau’s black aviator jacket, and the og ‘camel color’ tan ones to match his tan suede jacket)

my beau + puppygirl!gf and beau + stoner!gf headcanons kinda go hand in hand, so… she definitely also smokes🤞🏼 (this is more of me projecting)

So. Many. stuffed animals

OCT..... THE BRAINWORMS IM HAVIN AT THIS VERY MOMENT I CANT EVEN !!!&!;;@;# when i read the first thoughts i was thinking you'd LOVE them so much when i see beau i think of u most definitely GUYS LISTEN TO THIS GENIUS :((((( BEAU X PUPPYGIRL!GF IM TWEAKING OUT SO HARD AUGH im freaking the FUCK out 😞💓 STUFFED ANIMALS!!!!!!!!! EEK

[dietlemonadee]

12, 9, 48, 60, 77, 91, 100

[acewithapaintbrush]

You remember my headcanon for how and why MK drew the company logo for Pigsys shop? I haven't written fanfiction in years but I got inspired and typed this up. English is not my mother language but it should be alright, please enjoy:

***********

Here we go again.

Pigsy stirrs the noodles in his old reliable pot and sighs rather deeply. He does his best ignoring the tuft of hair darting in and out of the corners of his sight but that will only get him so far. As he knows very well from experience by now.

“Kid. Get over here already."

A giggle is his only answer as the small and scrawny boy climbs onto the only rickety chair that stands in front of Pigsys noodle cart. Brown eyes peek through unruly hair and a wide grin meets the pig demons stare.

"Hi Mr. Pigsy. Sir."

"Just Pigsy is fine kid. The usual?"

"My name is MK!" The boy, MK has an impressive pout, Pigsy will give him that. "And yes please!"

Pigsy prepares the bowl. The kid always orders the smallest dish but if you ask him, the boy is way too skinny. Pigsy always adds a little bit more to the dish, not that he would ever admit that.

"So, school alright?"

"Mei wasn't there today so it was really boring and Len tried to steal my pencils again but Ms. Guz stopped him. And then-"

Pigsy grunts here and there, not exactly ignoring the ramblings of a school boy but not exactly listening either. MKs voice is a surprisingly nice background noise and the constant chatter is definitely better than the silent and sad staring the boy had done the first few times he had braved Pigsys noodle cart.

"Well," Pigsy interrupts the retelling of the day and places his definitely larger than it should be order of noodles on the counter. "Sounds like a riot. Here you go."

In a well practiced dance, MK grabs the bowl with one hand and throws the money on the counter with the other. The first few times Pigsy was disturbed by the way MK would guard his bowl and devour the contents in a manner of minutes but by now the actions only bring a tired frown to his face.

"Slow down kid. You're gonna choke."

MK tries to answer and promptly chokes.

*********

Something is not right.

Pigsy steals a glance at his watch and frowns. The kid should have been here by now. Did school let out later that day? Is it a holiday that he forgot about?

Pigsy gives in and sticks his head out of the noodle cart to look up and down the street and ah, there is the tuft of brown hair. Half hidden behind a dumpster. MK peeks out, sees Pigsy watching him, gives a little 'eek' and hides behind the dumpster again.

What the heck is going on?

"Kid!" Pigsy yells and is gratified when the boy peeks out again. "What are you doing over there? Get over here!"

MK shuffles over, head down and fiddling with his ratty old backpack. Something about the sight bothers Pigsy. A lot.

"Your usual?"

"I'm. I'm not hungry today."

Pigsy narrows his eyes. MK is many things, but a good liar is not one of them.

"Try again."

And Pigsy is shocked to see tears in the corners of the kids eyes and a deep flush taking over his cheeks.

"I couldn't find -. I mean, I don't have enough money today."

And Pigsy is a hard business pig. He works many hours. Every day. He saves money so he can finally leave the noodle cart behind and afford that wonderful empty restaurant down the street and live his dream.

He has nothing to give away for free.

And while all that is true, he nonetheless fires up the pot and prepares a huge bowl of noodles for a small boy.

"Mr. Pigsy, I-"

"This one's on the house." At MKs doubtful look he elaborates. "You are my most loyal customer. Would probably be out of a job without you by now. Only this once, though. Got it?"

And maybe no money exchanges hands that day but MKs blinding smile might just be payment enough.

********

Turns out, Pigsy gets some payment after all the next day.

He stares at the picture the kid shoved into his hands with a kind of baffled amazement.

"You did this?"

The kid looks everywhere but at him. "Sorry it's not much. But I wanted to thank you for yesterday. So-"

Not much turns out to be a beautiful drawing of Pigsy with a bowl of noodles. Strong lines, happy colors and a grin on drawing-pigsys face that threatens to break out on the original as well.

"This is amazing! Can't believe you did this. I mean, what are you? Five?"

"Hey I'm nine!" MKs indignation doesn't last long. "You really like it? Really really?"

"I really like it. Thank you."

MK glows. There is no other word to describe it. The worries of the world he seems to carry with him some times fall away and Pigsy is left looking at a small child that is bursting at the seams with happiness, all because a old grumpy pig said he liked his drawing.

And Pigsy's chest aches, in all the right ways.

"Tell you what. This is gonna be my company logo as soon as I get my own restaurant."

MK blinks. "What?"

"It's perfect. Of course, as the creator I need your permission. Do I have your permission? I'll give you free noodles for the rest of your life at my new restaurant if you say yes."

Pigsy can see it in the kids eyes. MK doesn't believe him, thinks he is just pulling his leg, but MK wouldn't be MK if he wasn't up for some leg pulling.

"Sure Mr. Pigsy. But I want the big bowl."

"Deal."

And they shake on it and later at home Pigsy puts the picture up besides the photograph of the place he will buy sooner or later, even if it kills him, and every time he looks at it he is reminded of the fact that he has a new reason to keep going.

He's got a loyal customer to feed.

*****

When the kid is 15 he is already way taller than Pigsy so when the pig man shows him his new restaurant and the logo all over the place Pigsy almost collapses under the weight of a crying and laughing MK. His back is gonna kill him tomorrow but it will be worth it.

Everything was worth it.

"Come on kid. I owe you some noodles."

[sherrybaby14]

Prove Yourself

Prompt: Oh gosh, that blow job gif! Now I’m just imagining Dark!Bucky coming over to talk business with Dark!Tony and Tony asking Bucky if he wants a blow job while they talk, and when Bucky says yes. Tony tells you to be a good girl and give Bucky what he wants.

Pairing:  Bucky x You x Tony

Warnings:  Hmmm…maybe dub-con (I mean, read the prompt).  Also you’re a prostitute. Smut. BJ

A/N:  The gif was a Deadwood gif, but I am setting this as a mob AU

Words: 2500 (I don’t know how to drabble).

The sounds of the club were muffled by the door.  You were eager to go out and work the floor, but for now you waited in the Boss’ office.   The room looked impressive, a large desk with a giant mahogany chair and then two low seated chairs with a coffee table.  You imagined the artwork hanging in here was worth more than anything you had ever owned.  

You squirmed in your skin tight little black dress.  It was low cut and you were concerned your breasts were going to spill out if you took too deep a breath and barely covered the top of your thighs.  The black stilettos were the only other item of clothing you had on, if shoes counted as clothing.  

The door opened and your heart almost jumped out of your chest. Could you do this?  Sell yourself?  It wasn’t exactly the street corner, but there were still some ethical hang ups on your mind.  When you saw it was Natasha the adrenaline rushed out of your body.  

“Relax.”  Natasha walked over to you.  “Tonight is a test run. Prove to Tony how good you are and he will hire you and trust me, it’s a sweet gig.”  

“I think my dress it too small.”  You put a hand to your stomach and breathed in.  

“You look perfect.”  She gave you a reassuring smile.

It was easy for her to say that though. She was the madam of the operation and thus dressed in far less revealing clothing.  Natasha screamed management.  

“Where’s the confidence you displayed in your interview.”  She put her hands on your shoulders.  

You opened your mouth to respond when the door to the room opened.  Natasha spun her head and your jaw almost hit the ground when the man himself walked in.  You knew how dangerous he was, hell everyone knew he pretty much ran the city.  But seeing him in person, dressed to the nines in a suit, it filled you with awe.  

“Hey Nat.  This the new girl?”  Tony walked into his office.  His eyes scanned you up and down. “Very nice.”  

“Mr. Stark.”  You held out your hand. “I’m eager to show you my abilities.”  

A smile spread across his face as his eyes were glued to your chest.  

“I’m eager to check them out Miss, but unfortunately business calls.”  He twisted your hand and placed a kiss on your knuckles that sent a chill through your spine.  

“Mr. Barnes.”  Natasha’s voice made you look to the doorway.

James “Bucky” Barnes leaned against the frame.  They called him the Sergeant. You’d seen his picture before too, he was part of the Brooklyn mob.  He’d made a few headlines, but you never expected to see him here.  Weren’t they rivals?  

“Bring her back in when we’re done.”  Tony snapped his fingers at the other man, who strolled into the office.  

Natasha wrapped her arm around you and pulled you close, almost making you stumble in the heels.  

“You’re staring,” she whispered through gritted teeth and you dropped your gaze as she led you to the door.  

“Sorry,” you whispered back.  

“It’s alright Doll.”  Bucky’s voice made your nerves go on edge.  “I don’t mind the eyes on me.”  

Embarrassment flooded your veins.  You wanted to leave the room and never come back.  Maybe you weren’t cut out for this life.  

You were almost to the door when Tony spoke again.

“Wait.”  

Natasha spun both of you around.    

“As a show of good faith,” Tony spoke to Bucky. “You want a blow job while we talk?”  

A flash of heat came over you and saliva started to pool in your mouth.  The thought of sucking that beautiful man’s cock excited you like never before.  Change of mind, this was the life you were meant for.  

“Sure.”  Bucky took a seat at one of the low chairs.

“Wait for me outside.”  Natasha dropped her arm.  

Disappointment came now.  Of course they were talking about Natasha.  Tony didn’t even know what you were capable of, why would they let you suck off a VIP?  

“I want to try the new girl.”  Bucky clapped his hands. “If you don’t mind?”  

He wasn’t asking you, his eyes were on Tony.  For some reason that made you even hotter.  

“Be my guest.”  Tony sat in the other low chair.  “You will have to deliver me a report on her skills.”  

“Here’s your chance.” Natasha held out her hands, signaling for you to walk over.  

She winked at you, obviously aware of the eagerness you were feeling.

You took a step, but you weren’t used to the get up and almost fell out of your heel as your ankle wobbled.  

“She must be new.”  Bucky raised an eyebrow.  

Confidence.  That was what Nat mentioned.  You through your shoulders back and stepped out of the shoes.  You dropped to your knees and you noticed Tony started to smile.

“And full of surprises.”  He moved his jaw from side to side.  

You didn’t speak as you put your hands on the floor and started to crawl toward them.  The top of your dress was threatening to give and you almost wished it would.  Each motion forward your dress hiked up your hips and you were certain Natasha could see your ass and pussy, but then you heard the door click and realize she had left you all alone with these men.  

This wasn’t you, crawling toward two strangers, ready to blow one of them.  It was a better version.  One you hoped you could pull off.

With every slide of your legs you could feel the dampness growing.  How were you this excited this soon?  Why question it.  You were going to prove yourself, join the ranks of Tony Stark’s mafia, fuck these hot dangerous men and get paid for it.  You were practically drooling by the time you reached Bucky.  

You looked up at him through hooded lashes as your hands went to his belt.  He did not look away as you opened the buckle.  You felt for the button and undid his fly.   He lifted his hips and slid down his boxers and the top of his pants.  

To your surprise there wasn’t much prep work needed as he was already rock hard.  But then your eyes went wide at the monster in front of your face.  You realized it was going to take some work to get that down your throat.  

“That’s a good reaction.”  He reached out and pinched your cheek.  “Think you can handle me?”  

You didn’t know how to respond.  Honestly?  Which was uncertainty.  Or confident?  Like Nat advised.  

SPANK!  

“Eek!”  You jumped forward as a hand came down on your ass.  

It stung and you turned to see your potential employer glaring down at you.

“Be a good girl and give the man what he wants.”  Tony’s expression hardened.  

You gave a nod and turned your attentions back to Barnes.  

You dipped your head and went to the base of his shaft, making sure you had enough saliva on your tongue you ran it up the entire length and then took the tip into your mouth.  You lightly sucked and flicked your tongue over his head, wanting to let the saliva pool.  

“Back to business.”  Tony’s voice would not distract you from your mission.  “Why should I be interested in setting this deal?”  

“It’s a win win for all parties.”  Bucky wasn’t even paying attention to you.  

It sent a strange wave of jealousy through you, like his attention should be on you.  You brought your hand up and cupped his balls, lightly tugging them.  

“Ahhh.”  Bucky let out a weird noise.  “I mean, umm..there’s money to be MADE.”

He accentuated the word “made” right when you started to lower your head, taking more of him into your mouth as you forced your jaw to relax.  A surge of power ran over you,  maybe you could keep his attention.  

“Details?”  Tony stood up behind you, but you didn’t stop forcing Bucky down your mouth.  “I’m making a drink.  You want one?”  

“Yeah.”  A hand came to the back of your head and nails ran lightly across your scalp.  “I’ll take a drink.”

He tasted like man, tough and strong with a bit of salt mixed in, of course that was from the precum.  You let out a moan as he pushed your head deeper.  

“Fuck.”  Bucky let out a hiss.

You continued to swallow him, trying to lap at his shaft and suck lightly while your hand tugged at his balls.  

“She that good?”  Tony asked from across the room.  

“She knows her way around a blow job.”  Bucky relaxed the pressure on your head.  “When she moaned it was a new feeling for me, her mouth sort of vibrates.”  

It was wrong, but you loved the way they were talking about you, like you weren’t even in the room.  But more so you loved hearing the praise.  You relaxed your jaw further and took a deep breath through your nose before taking more of him, fighting past the gag reflex and burning in the back of your throat.  

“Damn.”  Bucky’s hips shifted as he fisted your hair.  “I’d say she has some skills.”  

“Well there is some business to discuss.”  Tony’s voice told you he was behind you again.  “Are you going to be able to keep talking?”  

“Ummm, yeah.”  There was the sound of two glasses clinking.  

You didn’t like that one bit.  His answer should have been no.  You knew better than to give too much too soon, but you had enough spit on his cock you could move faster, so you slowly picked up the pace, making sure to keep your tongue pressed hard against the bottom of his dick.  

“You were saying?”  There was an annoyance to Tony’s voice.  

That made you hotter.  Was he annoyed it wasn’t his cock you were sucking?  Or was he mad that Bucky wasn’t paying enough attention?  Either one suited you.  

“That money is going to get made.” Bucky sounded too clear.

You gave a harder tug on his balls and sucked down, lightly scraping your teeth against him.  

“FUCK!”  His hand returned to your head, pushing it down.  

“What’s the trade?”  Tony ignored Bucky’s outburst.  You were selfish, wanting the conversation back on you.

“Fifty fifty.”  Bucky relaxed his grip, but you didn’t lift your head.  

You could take him deep like this on your own and wanted to prove it.  His cock was getting even harder in your mouth.  

“No.” The sound of Tony swirling his ice cubes echoed across the walls.  “Sixty forty.”

“Fifty fifty is fair.”  Bucky was still paying too much attention for your liking.  

You started going even faster, bobbing your head and breathing through your nose.  Taking him deeper and deeper with each movement.  

He let out a groan and you’d never been more proud of yourself.  You increased your speed again, savoring the taste of the man as you took him down.  

“She is really good.”  His hands were still in your hair, but he wasn’t guiding you, more like holding on for dear life. “This might be the best hummer of my life.”  

You moaned at the acknowledgment and got another wince out of Bucky.  It made you move even faster, deeper, harder.  You started to think about how his cum was going to taste.  You were going to drink every drop of it.  

The fantasy and need were taking over as Bucky grew harder.  He was close to cumming and you wanted to take him over the edge.  

Another set of fingers was on your head and suddenly your neck was snapped back.  You cried out as your mouth was empty, but then you looked up to see Bucky with the same shocked look.  

“Sixty forty of you walk out of here with the biggest blue balls of your life.”  Tony’s mouth was right next to your ear.

You realized your chest was heaving and you looked at Bucky who looked pained and desperate.  

“Fine.”  He waved his hands in the air.  “Sixty forty.”  

Tony let go of your hair and you fell forward, catching yourself on Bucky’s knees.  You sighed in contentment, wasting no time taking his cock in your mouth.  

“You said you like it when she moans?”  Tony pushed up the back of your dress, leaving you completely exposed.  “Let’s see if we can help that along?”

A finger slid into your soaking pussy and you squealed in satisfaction, not realizing how empty you’d been feeling.  

“Oh shit.”  Bucky put his hand on the back of your head again, but there was no guidance.  “Keep doing that.”

You didn’t know if he was talking to Tony whose finger was sliding in and out of you with ease or you who was bobbing away on his cock again.  

“I’ll do you one better.”  There was the sound of a finger popping out of a mouth.  “This will really get her going.”  

Wet pressure was applied to your throbbing clit and you fell forward as an inhuman noise left your mouth.  You’d finally taken Bucky all the way, but any sort of burn in your throat was shadowed by the rubbing on your pearl.  

“Holy shit.”  Bucky groaned.

You managed to pick yourself back up again, half choking on him as you tried to slide your mouth up and down his cock and buck your pussy against Tony’s hands.  His skills were masterful and you were so eager to cum.  You started whimpering, unsure which part of your body needed more of your control.  

“FUCK!”  Bucky yanked your head down all the way and you felt him spasm, shooting his load straight down.  

Tony pressed down hard and you tried to shriek as the orgasm spread through your body.  But your mouth was too stuffed and you couldn’t even breathe, let alone cry out.  But you didn’t care if you ever had oxygen again as long as there were more climaxes like that in your future.

Bucky’s hand left your head and you lifted off of him, drooling and coughing as Tony continued to slowly rub your pussy until his fingers vanished.  You slumped over to your side on the edge of Bucky’s chair trying to collect yourself.  

“Are you going to hire her?”  Bucky pet your head.  “Because if not I’ll take her to our joint right now.”

“No.” Tony sounded stern.  

Disappointment flooded you and you wondered what you had done wrong as you turned your head to look up at your would-be-boss.  

Tony locked eyes with you and brought his finger to his lips, it was glistening with your juices as he pressed it into his mouth.   The visual sent a small aftershock through you.

“She’s going in my personal collection.”  He gave you a soft smile. “My use, and those I chose, only.”  

Your heart was about to pound through your chest at his declaration.  

“Now get out of here so I can enjoy my new girl in private.”  Tony’s eyes never left yours as Bucky stood up from the chair.  

You didn’t know where your life was headed, hell you didn’t know where your night was headed, but both looked good.  

[acotartogfan]

Can you do prompt 19 for Nessian?? I need some good nestaxcass baby times. I’m having fluff withdrawals ❤️❤️❤️😭😭😭

I hope this, in whatever tiny way possible, helps with the withdrawals. (i know i’m certainly feeling it too.) ㅠ.ㅠ

Prompt: “Why’s there a pregnancy test in the trash?”

Nesta was sprawled comfortably across the couch when Cassian came barreling down the stairs. 

Standing on the landing of the steps, the male leaned against the railing, bewilderment written all over his face. He held a short, white, plastic stick for Nesta to see. “What’s this?” 

Nesta said nothing.

He knows. 

Her heart began to pound sporadically as her gut twisted into a knot. She was going to tell him when she found the chance, but this was not how she wanted him to find out. 

“Why’s there a pregnancy test in the trash?” Cassian stepped off the landing and cautiously walked over to where Nesta was lying. “Nesta?” he crouched down and murmured softly, “Is there something you want to tell me?”

Nesta waved him off and did a mini eye-roll. “Stop being so patronizing.”

“Sorry,” he apologized quickly. “Um... I just feel like we should talk about this.”

Nesta inhaled deeply and exhaled, clearing her mind. “Yeah, we should.”

Cassian ran a hand through his long hair and exhaled through his nose. “I thought we agreed we weren’t going to try until… later.”

Nesta looked at him through her lashes. “After seeing Feyre’s baby, I decided a child wouldn’t be that bad.”

“Nesta,” he sighed, “you have to tell me these things. We could just have talked about it. Communication is key.”

“I know, I know. Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he rested a hand on her thigh, rubbing it gently. “Just… tell me these kinds of things.”

“I will.”

“So… the test came back positive if I’m correct,” he hesitated.

“It did,” Nesta said, searching Cassian’s eyes for some kind of hint for what he was feeling.

Nesta continued. “The question is, how do you feel about it?”

Cassian stood up and sat beside her, the couch dipping near where he sat. “I think… well… I love kids, and I would be happy with whatever you’re comfortable with. Whether or not you decide to keep the baby, it’s pretty much up to you. I mean,” he huffed a laugh, “you’re the one who’s going to carry the baby for nine months, so... It is your decision. And if you do decide to keep the baby, I will gladly support you and help you raise it. Starting a family with you, Nesta, is... It’s more than I ever could have imagined and/or hoped for.”

Tears slipped down Nesta’s cheeks at his confession. “Thank you,” she whispered fiercely, hope shining in her eyes. “Feyre told me how hard it is for the Faes to conceive, and I think we can do it.”

Cassian chuckled quietly. “We already did it.”

Nesta’s answering smile told him everything he needed to know. “Now, we’ll just have to wait and see.”

The male gazed at Nesta’s belly fondly, smiling softly. Nesta nearly combusted on the spot. She could thank all the gods for this beautiful, loyal, understanding male, and it still wouldn’t be enough. She wondered what she had done in her past life to deserve him. When she had wasted a year of her life on drinking and sleeping around, he had gently picked her up. When she danced with death and Hybern, he had offered his life for hers. When she had fallen into a depthless void of darkness and constructed a cage of thorns around her heart, he was the one who had thrown the net and wrested away the thorns. He had saved her again and again, and she figured she would repay him, both of them, by bringing a result of their shared love, into the world. 

Cassian’s voice broke her away from her listless reverie. “May I?”

A soft smile graced Nesta’s lips, and she nodded.

The warrior tentatively put his head on her stomach and stroked it with heartbreaking gentleness. “Hi,” he whispered, and Nesta practically melted. She wondered idly how he managed to stay single for centuries. 

Cassian placed a soft kiss to her clothed stomach. “I’m going to be your dad,” he whispered quietly, so quiet Nesta was sure only her Fae ears allowed her to hear it. 

“Thank you, Cassian,” she murmured.

“No, thank you, Nesta, for this wonderful gift.”

Haha sorry, I’m very new to writing fluff. This is my second time(?) writing fluff, so sorry if it isn’t great eek. It’s a learning process I guess.

You can find my prompt list here! Feel free to send me a fanfic request! I don’t bite ;)

[jokertrap-ran]

BAD MEDICINE ~Infectious teachers~ [PC GAME] Kashu Remu (Chemistry) Route Translations (Part 9)

MC’s name is retained as the original MC name Kawana Hina.

* Words within ‘   ‘ are spoken in English – *Spoiler free : Translations under cut!

Prologue / Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9

Choice A: Play catch

Kashu: Let’s play catch today~

Kashu: Come on~ What are you spacing out for~? Of course it’s part of the Chemistry Club’s activities~!

Hina: Uh, exactly what does catch have to do with the Chemistry Club…?

Kashu: Well, that’s...

Kashu: Well, don’t worry about the trivial things♪

Hina: ………...

Hina: (I should have already left the Chemistry Club by now; strange. Did he perhaps not accept my club resignation form? I bet that’s the case here…)

Hina: (Besides, considering what happened before, I don’t think that I’m in the position to refuse either…)

Kashu: Hey~ Can’t we? Let’s play catch~

Kashu: The experiment we did before didn’t turn out all so well, you see? So I thought that it would be a good change of pace to take down and record other kinds of data instead~!

Hina: Experiment? You mean...that medicine?

Kashu: Yup, that one! I’m really troubled that it’s been nothing but failures~

Kashu: That’s why, let’s do a new experiment! I’ll be the demon chasing you! Okay?

Kashu: Oh! Did you want to be the demon? I don’t mind being chased if you’re the one doing the chasing~

Kashu: But in exchange, I’ll do my best to set up a strange trap!

Hina: ...I’ll run.

Kashu: Eh~ You sure? Well, both are the same to me anyway. Let’s start!

Hina: Alright...

Kashu: You’ll do it~!? Yay~!! Thank you~!

Kashu: Then, allow me to explain the rules! Ehe~!

Kashu: The field will be the entire school compound. Everywhere’s fair play except for the places where entry is barred~

Kashu: I’ll start chasing after you 10 seconds after you run~

Hina: I get only 10 seconds!?

Kashu: Hm~? Is 10 seconds too short? Of course not! How can that be? You’re just overthinking it~

Kashu: I mean, you’re younger so this time frame should be perfect for you!

Hina: That...might be true, but still!

Kashu: It’s fine, it’s fine~ I’m always cooped up in the labs, you see~?

Kashu: So, I’m sure that my physical capabilities aren’t as strong as yours! I might be on the weaker side~

Kashu: Now then~ Let’s start the countdown! Okay, please do your best to run away, okay~?

Hina: Eh? We’ve already started!? I’ve yet to prepare my heart for this...

Kashu: Oh yes, you can’t run in the hallways. The courtyard’s fair game though~

Kashu: Oh! You can run in the gymnasium and the rooftop too~ Now, let us begin~! Ten, nine, eight...

Hina: (I’ve gotta run, in any case!)

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Hina: Haa, haa, haaah…S-Sensei…? What do you mean...you don’t...have the stamina for this!? ...Haa...haa…

Kashu: Eh~? I really don’t~ I mean, it took me this long to finally catch you~!

Kashu: Ahaha~ That was really fun though~! We’ve really chased each other round in circles all over the school~!

Kashu: It’s not bad to have such a thorough work out once in a good while~ It’s really refreshing!

Hina: I’m...definitely going to get muscle aches tomorrow...

Kashu: Eh? Why~? That’s weird; you’ve been taking physical activity classes every week, right~?

Kashu: Ah~ But it was still really fun! I’ve not played catch in such a long time~

Kashu: She’s the only one I’ve ever played together with the same manner I did with you~

Hina: Huh? She…? You mean, that girl?

Kashu: Hm? Ahh…You remembered? Hehe.

Kashu: Yeah, that’s right. She was the only one who was willing to play with me back in that orphanage...

Kashu: We didn’t have much toys to speak of, so we all mostly played catch and hide-and-seek.

Kashu: It was really fun. It’s fun...to not be alone.

Hina: Sensei...

Kashu: ...Now then! I’m amply re-energized right now so let’s end the club activities here for today~☆

Kashu: Oh, but before that! Maybe I’ll give you an after-service for working so hard!

Kashu: Hmmm...would this place do? Yeah, I suppose so. It’s at the right height too~

Kashu: Okay, sit on the step here~ It’s fine, so just do it~

Kashu: Okay, preparations are all done! Here we go then~

Hina: …...!? Sensei...!?

Kashu: You said that your muscles are aching from all the chasing and running we did, so I’m guessing that it must be the muscles on your legs? Your calf, perhaps~?

Hina: (He’s massaging my leg!?)

Kashu: Whoa, whoa!? Don’t start struggling all of a sudden~!

Kashu: I’m not playing a prank on you or anything~ Didn’t I say that this was an after-service?

Kashu: Come on~  Weren’t you the one complaining about how your muscles would definitely be hurting come tomorrow~?

Kashu: You see~ The thing about muscle aches is that the symptoms will become much more manageable if you massage it in advance~

Hina: Um, Kashu-sensei? It’s fine, I can do that myself!

Kashu: It won’t disappear completely, but it’s still much better than having to suffer the full-blow of it, don’t you think?

Hina: (He’s not even listening to me!)

Kashu: So just stay still~ Let’s see...

Hina: Eek!!

Hina: (That tickles!)

Kashu: Around here? How’s it feel? A pleasant pain?

Kashu: It won’t do if it hurts~ Putting too little strength into it won’t cut it either~ This is really hard~

Hina: It’s ticklish…!

Kashu: Eh~? It’s ticklish? Then that’s no good either. Should I put in more strength?

Hina: Uh, ummmm!!

Kashu: Like I said~ Don’t struggle. Do you want your muscle ache to get worse?

Kashu: Yes, now that’s a good girl. Stay still, okay? Oh, but please relax and don’t stiffen up.

Kashu: Hmm, here we go...how does this feel?

Hina: It feels...pleasant.

Kashu: Yup, this is good. Just enough strength to cause a pleasant sort of pain~ I’ll just stick to using this much strength then!

Kashu: Pain, pain, fly away~♪ May the muscle ache disappear somewhere! May it go to Kakeru-kun~!

Kashu: Because there are still many, many more experiments that I wish to carry out with you!

Kashu: So, this muscle ache of yours has to hurry and disappear♪

Kashu: ...Because you’re the only one who knows my secret and I’m the only one who knows yours...

Hina: ………...

Kashu: ...Okay~ I suppose this does it? How do you feel? Better?

Hina: Y-Yes. Um...Thank you.

Kashu: I see, that’s good to hear♪

Kashu: Oh, right! How about I massage your shoulders too since I’m at it?

Kashu: I could add on a special service to the after service if you wish~

Hina: N-No thanks! I’m fine! Thank you for the offer, but I’ll have to refrain!

Kashu: Ehh~ You sure…? How boring~

Kashu: Well, whatever! It’s about time school’s over anyway~

Kashu: Good work today, Kawana-san♪ You’re free to go home now~ See you~!

Kashu: I wonder what I should do~ I’m in really good spirits right now so maybe I’ll continue with my experiment~♪

Hina: (I feel like I don’t ever want to play another round of catch in my entire life, but...)

Hina: (I suppose it’s fine if it served as an ample distraction for him...)

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Hina: What should I do now? 

Choice A: Play catch  Choice B: Peek into the school’s courtyard

[tonitheloftwing]

UnShelled: The Freak The Mighty And Unwind Crossover No One Asked For

The image had stayed in Max’s head for ages. The image of Kevin, spraying chili powder into his father and captor’s eyes, sending him back to jail where he belonged. If this new law passed, there could be the possibility that his father could be unwound and shelled. Killer Kane, Killer Kane, a parts pirate soon to have no brain. He hadn’t known what shelling was originally, when he’d first heard of it on the news, so he’d asked Grim. 

“Shelling’s a horrible thing. They unwind you and then throw out the brain. You’re not alive in a divided state if they shell you, I sure think,” Grim declared.

 “Of course you’re not alive without a brain,” Max said. “No different than being a zombie then.” Even though Max was pretty sure he had no brain- he was a massive butthead. He wondered- would he want shelling to be his father’s fate, or was it too cruel? Better than the death penalty. At least his stupid body would be helping somebody. 

“I heard the only type that shell is that foreign unwinding place,” Gram said with a shake of her hand. “What do they call it… The Zah Dey?”

“It’s the Dah Zey,” Grim corrected. “Something for flesh market.”

“Kevin said it’s Burmese,” Max interrupted. Kevin had… a very strong stance on unwinding. 

“How unchivalrous! It’s a horrible practice, and should never be performed on anyone nor supported,” he claimed. “I know they can’t unwind me because I’m ‘unclean’. Well, I’ll show them unclean! I’ll protest against unwinding until this nonsense stops!” 

Max had always admired his friend’s courage and way to speak his mind. He admired that he even had a mind, something Max always felt that he had lacked. Freak was his mind; together, they were Freak The Mighty, nine feet tall and with the biggest brain you’d ever seen. Even separate, they were a menace. Freak had led to the arrest of a notorious parts pirate, and Max had passed the eighth grade! They were unstoppable! 

Max thought about unwinding a lot. No doubt if he’d been adopted out instead of taken in by Grim and Gram he’d be a pile of organs by now- a big pile of organs. He was probably worth a lot on the black market, an extremely tall, boeuf 13 year old, the prime age for unwinding. Maybe his dad would have raised him a tithe if he “found the light” earlier. Max chuckled at that. The thought of him, a tithe! He’d probably be the biggest tithe of all time. Maybe they could put him in Ginny’s World Record book or whatever it was called. 

Max also thought about parts pirateering. When your father was someone who was so cruel to send his own wife off to be unwound by the Burmese Dah Zey, you had to. Iggy and Loretta were still tied up in that business, and Max vowed to stay away from them for that very reason. Even if Loretta had saved his life once. Maybe she was just eyeing up his parts. She always acted like she was, anyways. 

One day, Kevin declared that he had a quest. “We must go to where I am to receive my robot body! To the Medical Research Center, noble steed!” 

And so Freak hopped up on Max’s shoulders and they became Freak The Mighty once again as Max galloped off into the sunrise with the smaller boy on his back. This was Max’s favorite thing in the world; the wind blowing through his hair, Kevin on his shoulders, off on a wild quest to who knows where. He loved Kevin, Freak, whoever the hell he was, he knew he did. He wasn’t sure what that love meant or what kind of love it was, but it was there. His butthead was too stupid to figure out what it was. The only way would be to ask Freak, and then he’d know that Max was a butthead too stupid to understand love, and then where would they be? But Kevin never treated Max like a butthead. He seemed to be the one person in his life who understood that even if he was one, there was no need to treat him like one. Teach the big goon to read and write, eek eek. Then call him a noble steed. 

“The castle looks just fabulously ravishing today, doesn’t it?” Freak said from atop his steed. 

“Ravishing? Hungry?”

“No, that’s famished. Ravishing means beautiful, alluring, bewitching…”

“So all the things your mom is?” Kevin smacked Max with one of his crutches. “The noble steed will not make comments about his rider’s mother.” Max untied one of Kevin’s shoes playfully, a game they always played together. Kevin always pretended it ticked him off, but Max knew it didn’t. Then when he got off of him, Max would tie his shoe back up. Kevin was originally surprised he could even tie a shoe. 

“So, when are you getting your robot body?” Max asked curiously.

“Why do you ask?”

“I’m really nervous for you,” Max admitted. “I mean, you’re getting a bionic body. That’s pretty freaky.”

Kevin sighed. “Max, it’s time you know. There is no robot body. It’s just as fictional as Arthurian legend. I came up with it to help myself cope with the inevitable, the inevitable being my soon but sure demise. It’s called manifestation. If I lie to myself enough, it becomes true to me.”

Max didn’t understand most of what Freak had said, but seeing the tears in his eyes told him most of what he needed to know. “You’re… going to die?” Kevin nodded. “My organs are just getting too big for my body, and since I refuse unwound organs, I’m not going to last long.”

“Why don’t you just take them?” Max asked, trying to plead with him. “The kids got unwound anyways.”

“Do you know how hard it’d be to find organs small enough for my body?” Kevin asked. “They’d need to unwind a three year old. And they’d have to make it so the organs couldn’t grow either,” he explained. “It’d be far too complicated. And possibly illegal.”

“But you can’t die!” Max exclaimed. “Without you, I’m just… The Mighty. I need my Freak.”

“That which comes cannot be avoided,” Kevin said seriously. 

But Max would find a way to stop it. He knew he could.

First, he needed money. Lots of it. But where does one get lots of money? He swore to never be a criminal, but that might be the only way. Kevin would have called what he was doing a quest of the unnoble variety, but he needed the money. Enough money to bribe someone who probably had all the money in the world. 

So, he ransacked all the abandoned houses in town he could find. Eventually he’d stolen one, two thousand dollars? He’d been able to find a diamond necklace he’d been able to pawn off, and he had his cash. Now, time to go to the people he’d needed.  

“Loretta? Loretta, you in there?” Max asked, banging on the door. Eventually, the woman with the fake eyelashes and droopy lips greeted Max tiredly. 

“What do you want, kid?” She asked. “No, I’m not lending you money.”

“Oh, I’m not asking for money,” he said with a smirk. “Quite the opposite. You’re going to become very rich.”

“So, let me get this straight…” Loretta thought, long and hard. “You’re going to pay us to take you to the Dah Zey?”

“Well, not quite. The money is to bribe the higher ups into letting me do what I want. But yes, I’m submitting myself to you as an AWOL. No one has to know, and the Dah Zey will still pay you.”

“Well, your plan’s crazy, but you got a deal, kid,” 

Soon enough, he was on a plane to Burma, going to be unwound… maybe. He could admit he was scared out of his shorts, but this was something he needed to do, or else innocent lives would be over. He must do this.

Loretta and Iggy wouldn’t be making this journey with him, as they claimed that they were too small in the parts pirateering business to meet the owners of the harvest camps themselves. According to them, they didn’t even know what happened at the harvest camps, at least no more than anyone else knew. It had recently come out that the Dah Zey experimented on children, when the doctor had publicly made an appearance with his chimpanzee-footed assistant. Max had bigger dreams than being put on postcards, but he had a similar goal to Mr. Chimpanzee. To become an experiment of the doctor’s.

When Max arrived at the Dah Zey, they threw him in a cell, by himself. “Volunteers get special permission. You don’t go with others.”

Max wasn’t bothered by the man’s poor English; he was just anxious to meet the doctor. Only then did he realize how miserable the existence of the prisoners at Dah Zey were. 

Despite being a volunteer, Max was given very little food or water, and only a bucket to eliminate himself in. For entertainment, he was given a crappy old TV with only movies buttheads would ever want to watch, and especially enjoy. But he put them on anyways, because he was a butthead. I mean, what kind of butthead would turn themselves into parts pirates for a friend?

Apparently an impressive butthead, as later Max received a private audience with the doctor. 

“My name is Doctor Rodín,” he said, sitting down. “And you purposefully… volunteered yourself for experimentation?” 

“Yes, although you’re only allowed to experiment on me if you do exactly what I want and as I say.” 

The doctor snorted. “And why should I?”

“Because.” Max took out wads and wads of cash from his pockets. “I’ll make you very rich indeed.”

“Boy, I see more than that in a day,” he said, and Max couldn’t tell if he was bluffing or not. “But I love to meet someone with my same interest in human experimentation. So, pitch your idea to me.”

“Imagine,” Max started. “A nine foot tall giant, with a brain just as big to match. He’s super smart, like, super duper smart. He could probably invent world peace or something. Or something that’d make somebody rich.”

“I’ve already done experiments for giants,” he scoffed. “They went poorly, though. The person survived, but they’re completely bedridden. I’ll have to come up with another way than stacking spinal columns.”

“Sir, I’m already 7 feet tall, and I’m only 14. Imagine how much taller I’ll be when I’m older. Or you could give me, let’s say, a two foot spinal column addition.”

The doctor looked intrigued. “So, what exactly are you proposing?”

“I have a friend who’s a supergenius, but he’s going to die soon, his organs grow but his body doesn’t. So, why don’t you shell him…” “And then shell you…”

“And then put Kevin’s brain inside my body. Oh, yeah, Kevin’s the supergenius. And, we’ll be normal enough that we can pass as a normal person, someone who could maybe publicize your experiments as not cruel, but rather innovating.” Saying all these things made Max sick, but it had to be done to save Kevin’s life. 

“I see. And what shall we call you?”

“Freak the Mighty.”

“I like that.”

Kevin woke up one day, no memory of what had happened to him or where he was. 

That was when he noticed how big he felt. His hands felt heavier, his feet reached further down in the bed than they ever had before, and when he sat up, he felt two tons of extra weight. Well, not two tons, but that was what hyperboles were for. 

He wasn’t himself. This wasn’t his body. He was Max. 

He noticed a doctor looking down on him curiously. “Hello, Freak The Mighty.”

[sandalaris]

For the writer asks: 5, 10, 17, 22, 23, 30, 45, & 54!! :D

Finally getting around to answering these XD

5. Books or authors that influenced your style the most.

I read so much I feel like I can’t narrow it down. My favorite author is Ilona Andrews but they write almost exclusively in first person and have their fair share of action in their novels that I don’t think they’re that much of an influence on me. I’m trying to think of who I read that did the whole “people usually feel a mix of emotions over just one” thing that I know I’ve adopted, but I can’t think of who it is. (I can think of an author, who I do love the books of, who did the opposite and I found myself always confused about a character was supposed to be feeling/thinking and they probably influenced me to not do that, but I do like their books and that seems too much like I’m trying to be negative about them.)

10. Pick a writer to co-write a book with and tell us what you’d write about.

If I got to pick anyone, it’d be Marissa Meyer who wrote the Lunar Chronicles. It would be for one novel/novella, because I feel like the Lunar Chronicles has one more sort of side story in it and would want so badly for it to fit what the author has already written. If you haven’t read the series, it’s basically a retelling of various fairy tales just set in the future, like Cinderella has a metal prosthetic foot that keeps falling off and Rapunzel is a hacker living in a satellite orbiting earth. Everything is set up to perfectly fit a Beauty and the Beast side-story. Genetically altered super soldiers who are big and hairy and given animal aggression and had all their teeth surgically replaced with fangs for failing to pass a test as a child? Check! Now all we need is to write a story about the bookish daughter of a geneticist who gets blackmailed into staying with the “beast” and slowly learns that there’s a man inside of the monster and ends up figuring out how to reverse some of the alterations (because we already got the “I love him just as he is, fangs and all” thing from Scarlet and Wolf so we can have a little “curse breaking” this time around.) It can be set post-series, when some of the wolf-soldiers ran off and disappeared into various countries.

I once co-write a novel with my best friend about an evil warlock who fell in insta-love with a ditzy elf and spent the rest of the novel trying to avoid her so he could dodge his fate of retiring from villainy like his father and grandfather before him. He was determined to be the one villain in his family who actually went through with his evil master plan, dammit! It was a comedy, and kind of a spoof since we were at that age where romance novels were the thing to make fun of, but it still ended with him deciding he could do evil masterminding later and running off with the elf. What can I say, we were like twelve.

17. On average, how much writing do you get done in a day?

Eek, the problem with averages is that any sort of outlier knocks everything else off, and I have a lot of outliers, lol. I go through writing spurts, sitting down and all but knocking out an entire chapter/one-shot in one sitting followed by days where I won’t even open a word document. And then there’s sort of my inbetween times where I’m usually typing away on something, but it’s more editing than actual writing, so maybe 100 or so new words might get written, but what I’ve previously written looks better by the end, lol. This has been the norm especially lately with school and work taking up the majority of my time. And then it hits me and I just need to let the story flow out of me? Between 2k-5k a sit down session.

22. How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied and a project is ultimately done for you?

I don’t really do true drafts. I write, I edit, I post, and then I suddenly see all my typos. On the rare occasion editing doesn’t fix the issue, I might cut the scene into chunks and sort of look for the line(s) that don’t fit and start branching off from there (like maybe someone’s acting out of character *glares at current chapter* and I just needed to look at it in smaller incriments to see where they started to veer off). Only once have I ever just completely reworked the extremely extremely rough draft I had written, but that was an original work I did for Nano and so was more concern with getting words on a page than editing as I go.

I suppose editing could count as a second draft, so two? Maybe three? What is considered One Editing? If I leave off and come back, is it an all new edit/draft, or am I picking up where I left off?

23. Single or multi POV, and why?

Nine times out of ten I seem to veer towards single, although I’ve had some fun with multiple POVs before.

Not really sure why. Maybe I just find it easier to burrow into one person’s headspace and go from there? I know there are times when I want to jump to another character for one specific scene, but I always feel like I’m already committed to telling things from the one character’s POV. Or maybe I just like the limited narrator thing.

30. Favorite line you’ve ever written.

Err.. I don’t know that I have one. How about a line I rather like? This is from a kind of Amaru/Brasa fic (kinda sorta. He’s got that whole mix of love and hate and resentment and worship thing going on, and she has her own twisted attachment to him) set in those six months between seasons. These lines are from a moment where Kate surfaces and Brasa fantasizes about taking out some of his resentment of Amaru on Kate. (He never actually physically harms her, Amaru would never allow someone to mark her vessel simply because its hers, but he likes to imagine.)

He thinks about wide green eyes looking up at him with fear, filling with tears as she whimpers out a “Please.” Imagines pressing a hand to her shoulder, pressing down down down until she’s kneeling before him, trembling as he cups her jaw, forcing her head back. He wants to press his thumb to the plump swell of her bottom lip, dig his nail in until the blood, her soul, comes to the surface. Filling the flesh with color until it spill across her chin in a vibrant slash.

and to give you an idea of how Kate is handling Brasa’s attempts to take his issues out on her...

He can see the muscle at the hinge of her jaw tighten, hear the harsh edge of every exhale, as she turns to look up at him mere inches away.  

“My name,” she clips, “is Kate.” She bites off the last, harsh sound, almost snapping her teeth at him.

45. Worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten.

I’m trying to think of actual feedback and not just like angry comments/reviews from people who didn’t like my fics (which tbh I haven’t gotten that much of because people aren’t generally that big of a dick to leave flames on fics these days.)

Someone tried to tell me that a character dropping the f-bomb was unnecessary and jarring and I should remove it from one of my fics. And hey, to each their own, but I personally felt it fit both the character (who cursed in canon) and the story and so kept it in. People certainly can write great literature without every putting down a single curse word, but there’s also great stories that wouldn’t be the same without a bit of foul language. What bugged me most about it was their insistence I should remove it.

Besides that the only other bad feedback I’ve gotten (besides obvious flames and people not liking the direction I’m going/have gone with a story), was someone who said that my clearly labeled unhealthy relationship fic was romanticizing abuse and they didn’t appreciate the one character manipulating the other character like that. They were actually fairly nice about it (if a bit of an anti about the whole thing), I just remember being a little bugged at the time because I had already tagged it as unhealthy/manipulative.

54. Any writing advice you want to share?

Don’t be afraid to experiment! And in that same vein, try out writing rules and discard them just as quickly if they aren’t for you, because there’s no set in stone way to doing things. Break all the rules if you want, the point is just to write. XD

Thanks!!

[hitchell-mope]

Nine months ago

Harry (bursting into the diner): IT’S GON-AH HA HA

Uma: what?

(Harry waggles his eyebrows)

Gil: OH! M

Harry: don’t say it’s name Gills. It’s personage no grating

Uma: first off it’s persona non grata. And. WHAT. She’s gone? Look me in the eyes and say that. Slowly.

(She’s holding Harry’s face in her hands. And he appears to be melting from the contact)

Harry: hur hur. Gone. The genie. The one that stabbed me. The pup. And that bitch what hurt you

(She drops him and he falls to the floor)

Uma: they’re gone. They’re. They’re they’re. They’re. Gone (laughing now) and we’re still here. Hahahahahaha

Gil: yay. Uma’s happy. I love it when she’s happy

Harry (rightfully worried): she ain’t laughing love.

Gil: if she’s not laughing what’s she doing

Uma: it’s not laughter. It’s hysteriaaaaARGH

(She throws a bottle at the shelf behind her and the whole thing sets fire)

Uma: if I ever see her again I’ll kill her

(She stands in front of the fire. Harry looks like he’s just seen god for the first time. Gil’s rushing about fetching water and damp rags. Everyone else looks terrified)

Uma: no quarter. Is that understood

Everyone: yes cap’n

(Dizzy walks in completely unfazed)

Dizzy: I was wandering if you heard the good news. And judging by the bonfire you have. Isn’t it brilliant.

Harry (childishly imitating her): ooh isn’t its brill don’t (normal voice) nobit us not brilliant. Uma should be over there not them.

Dizzy: but Uma. Didn’t your mother lose to a fish?

Uma: mermaid actually. They have human brains. Though they’re still useless sheep my cousin included. God! How did she win. How does she keep WINNING? Every damn time

Dizzy: if it helps I don’t think she wanted to go. She looked upset

Harry: oh you poor little runt. It’s just a rose

Uma: ruse Harry. Ruse

Harry: right. Ruse. Now fuck off and I’ll see ya tomorrow for collection

Dizzy: you mean extortion

Harry: yes

(He drags her out by the arm and dumps her just outside the door. Dizzy gets up and dusts herself off)

Dizzy (muttering): tch bastard

Six months ago

(The coronation is being shown live across the kingdoms. Maleficent has just crashed it. Dizzy is watching on the tv in the salon. The sea three and the crew are watching it on the restaurant. Dragon Maleficent has just gone for Mal)

Uma: 🎶kill her kill her kill her kill her kill her kill her🎶

(She stands up on the counter conducting the crew with a soup stained ladle.

Crew (with Harry’s voice rising above the others): 🎶kill her kill her kill her kill her kill her kill her🎶

(At the salon)

Dizzy: don’t die don’t die don’t die. Please don’t die.

(...and Maleficent is now a harmless lizard)

Harry: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Uma (turning around and seeing that Mal has triumphed again): ...FUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!

Dizzy (gloriously happy): YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!!!

Two and a half months ago

(The kings trip to Agrabah is in the screen. Mal makes a face)

The crew: choke choke choke choke choke choke

(Uma again gets on the counter and conducts them with a ladle. This time to the tune of “look down” from les miserables. On the tv Mal rushes too near by pot and throws up her entire dinner into it. She rest her head on the outer edge in shame while Uma and her crew laugh their collective heads off)

(In the salon)

Dizzy: oh poor Mal

(Behind her she’s marked the days since Evie has left the island)

Two days ago

(On the tv)

Newscaster: there appears to be a cyclone in the middle of Auradon prep campus with king Ben in the eye of the storm nobody quite knows what AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

(The newscaster has turned to dust. The picture vanishes. But you can still hear Mal screaming in pain)

Dizzy: oh my god

(At the restaurant)

Uma: Oh. My. God. Nobody could survive that. (She starts laughing shakily) Oh this is the best day of my life.

(She continues laughing)

Gil (worried about her): is this historia again?

Uma (still laughing): no. Oh Gil. Buddy second mate. I’m happy. Actually genuinely ecstatically happy. For the first time in years. Would you like know why?

Gil (happy): why?

Uma: because that disgusting little bitch finally got what was coming to her. And now she. Is. Dead. HA HA

Harry (bursting in): is it true. Oh god please tell me it’s true

Uma: yes. She is dead. And so is the king.

(Harry crows in triumph. Uma cuts him short by pulling him into a kiss that lasts for two minutes. When she releases him his giggles once. Then faints. Everything around Uma darkens. Behind her is vision!gil)

Vision!Gil: don’t fall into euphoria quite yet. For all you know she could be alive

Uma: don’t make me feel bad for finally being happy for the first time in eight years. She’s dead. I won. End of story

Vision!Gil: very well my girl. Have it your way. But don’t come crying to me when you’re proven wrong

(He disappears. Everything else returns to normal)

A day and a day ago

Harry (his arm hanging awkward and painful at his side): she’s back

Uma: what

Harry: the bitch is back.

Uma: what happened to your arm?

Harry: it broke my arm

(He puts on his best puppy face. Uma takes his arm gently in her hands her eye glow turquoise and the arm heals. Then her eyes glow brighter and several glasses explode and some of the plates spontaneously combust)

Uma: this is not fair this is not fair. She keeps winning and I keep losing. WE. WERE SUPPOSED TO GO. But ohhhh no. She goes. She gets the life we deserve and she doesn’t even have the common courtesy to DIE

Gil (pulling her into a hug): hey. Hey. It’ll be alright. It’s a big island. You’ll hardly see her.

24 hours ago

Gil (bursting into restaurant absolutely ecstatic): uma! 🎶Uma Uma Uma🎶 guess what guess what guess what

Uma: you killed your brothers and you want out help getting rid of the bodies? I could make the corpses into the Thursday special. Hades knows we need a new one

Gil: huh?

Uma: never mind. What’s the news

Gil: the king is here. In jay’s hat

Uma (intrigued): what

Gil: Ben is here. With jay Carlos and that crazy girl who stabbed Harry in the leg

(Harry pointedly rubs his right shin)

Uma: what about the hat?

Gil: I dunno. They looked like Harry when he cut open Anthony’s che

Harry: I don’t think we need to relive that. Do we Gilly?

Gil: eek. Now I’m done

Uma: So they looked like a group of shifty bastards?

Gil: yes

Uma: OH. OH HO HO. They’re here to get it back. Kicking and screaming. You know what? I do believe we could work this to our advantage. Harry!

Harry (halfway out the door): already on it.

Gil: what’s happening? Did I do something wrong?

Uma: c’mere. (She leans up and pecks him on the forehead). Gil my friend. You just did something very very right

[jumukus]

A3! Event: The Floral Prince Chapter 3 Translation

Citron and Guy have come to help the members of Summer Troupe be a proper prince.

Izumi: I’ve invited special instructors for us today!

Tenma: Special instructors?

Citron: I’ll teach you how to be a no bra prince!

Tenma: It should be “noble,” you know!

Yuki: You’re not noble at all.

Izumi: Then, Guy-san, please teach us things about a prince from a retainer’s point of view.

Guy: I hope it’ll be useful.

Citron: All right then, the first lesson will be about dance!

As a prince, you have to be able to dance about one, two, three or nine step counts. I shall escort the curry lady.

Director, may I have this dance?

Izumi: Huh!? Me!? I’m not good at dancing….

Citron: You can just move your body as I say.

Right, left, right…. That’s right--you’re good at this! Director, your basic skill is perfect!

Izumi: Whoah, amazing. I’m dancing! My body still remembers Homare-san’s special training.

Yuki: Huh, so the instructor is doing it.

Kazunari: What a real prince!

Kumon: Amazing! I expect no less from Citron-san!

Muku: You’re cool, Citron-sama! I wonder if I can do that.

Citron: Obviously! All right then, let’s line up there, guys.

First, go to the right, left, right left… Before both of your hands move diagonally, you need to--.

Yuki: Say, don’t you think this is weird?

Misumi: It’s different from the previous one~.

Muku: It’s not cool at all… This must be because I’m a overboiled, flabby pasta...

Tenma: Hey, isn’t this the loach scooping dance*!?

Citron: Ahaha, my mistake.

Izumi: (Will, will this be all right….)

Guy: As a retainer, we have to move while anticipating every single command from our master.

Citron: I talked too much; I’m getting thirsty now.

Guy: Here’s your water.

Citron: It’s been a while since I last danced. My feet are sore.

Guy: Here’s a cold pack.

Citron: I’m brongry.

Muku: I’m brongry?

Yuki: What are you talking about?

Guy: Here’s your sandwich.

Izumi: Did you possibly mean, “I’m hungry”?

Tenma: There’s no way we would understand that one!

Kumon: I didn’t understand at all!

Yuki: Normal people wouldn’t understand that.

Guy: So he did actually say he was hungry….

Tenma: You didn’t know that!?

Guy: I just guessed it with my retainer’s instinct.

Kazunari: You’re way too competent, Guyguy!

Misumi: A retainer has it tough, huh~.

Manager: Kyaaa!!!

Muku: !?

Yuki: Isn’t that manager’s voice?

Guy: It’s from the courtyard.

Izumi: Let’s go take a look!

Manager: E, eek…

Izumi: What’s wrong, manager!?

Manager: Ha, ha, ha…..

Tenma: Hahaha?

Misumi: He’s laughing~.

Manager: Y-you got it wrong! Please take a look at that!

White Horse: *neighs*

Izumi: A horse!?

Kumon: It’s a white horse! How cool!

Kazunari: It’s so beautiful! I’ll take pics and posts it on Insta!

Izumi: Anyway, why is there a horse here in this place!?

Citron: Oh, I forgot about this! I borrowed it for the horse riding lesson!

I actually wanted to bring my favorite horse in Zahra, Pochi. But I’d feel bad because of how long it’d take to bring it here, so I gave up.

Tenma: Pochi, you say--that’s usually a name for dogs, you know.

Yuki: But to think you even went all the way to prepare a horse, you sure are serious about this.

Citron: A prince must have a horse, you know! This is Muku’s proud moment, after all, so I want to contribute too.

Muku: Thank you, Citron-sama.

Citron: Anyway, the timing is perfect. Let’s start our horse riding lesson!

First, try to mount it, Muku.

Muku: M-me?

Guy: I will support you, so you can relax and mount it.

Muku: Y-yes!

…heaves, ho.

Citron: You can mount it by yourself, Muku?

Muku: I’ve ridden a horse before….

Citron: Excellent! There’s nothing to teach you, then.

Next is Tenma!

Tenma: I don’t need to do it, you know.

Izumi: But it may be useful for our future performances.

Tenma: ….It can’t be helped, then. I’ll give it a try.

Guy: You need to grab here first--.

White Horse: *whines*.

Tenma: !?

Misumi: The horse didn’t want Tenma to get on it~.

Tenma: Hah!?

Yuki: You can talk to horse too, huh, Triangle Alien.

Tenma: Why did it not want me to mount him!?

Misumi: Hmm….

White Horse: *neighs*.

Misumi: No reason, it said!

Tenma: What’s with that answer!?

Tenma: *sigh*.... I’m tired.

Kazunari: That was hard.

Misumi: Being a prince is difficult~.

Muku: But I’m glad we got to learn it well.

Tsuzuru: ….

Izumi: Huh? Tsuzuru-kun? What’s wrong?

Tsuzuru: ….

Yuki: He’s moving without saying anything.

Kumon: It’s scary.

Kazunari: What’s wrong, Tsuzurun? Are you okay?

Masumi: “The script is done.”

Muku: He spoke!

Izumi: But this voice is Masumi-kun’s?

Kumon: Now that I look at it closely, Masumi-san is controlling Tsuzuru-san from behind!

Yuki: Tsuzuru’s eyes are closed, so he must be sleeping.

Misumi: He’s moving while sleeping~.

Tenma: More like, he’s being moved.

Izumi: I-In any case, you’re bringing the script with you, right? Thank you.

Masumi: “Yes.”

Izumi: Masumi-kun, let Tsuzuru-kun sleep already...!

Masumi: Got it.

Tenma: I’ve thought that Tsuzuru-san has gotten better treatment, but it’s actually reached to the point of controlling him.

Yuki: He couldn’t even manage to do that before he becomes like that.

Muku: Tsuzuru-san always pushes himself too hard…

Tenma: Let’s read the script for now.

Izumi: Y-you’re right.

(The title for the play is, “The Floral Prince”....)

Muku: Whoah…!

Izumi: What’s wrong?

Muku: So, so-sorry! I’m kind of surprised when I see the first name of the cast….

Izumi: (The first name of the cast…. I see. “Prince Florence - Muku Sakisaka,” is written here.)

Yuki: Why are you surprised?

Tenma: Pull yourself together, lead actor.

Muku: Y-yes!

Izumi: (To think that Muku-kun’s first time leading a play would be welcomed like this, I’m really glad.)

(I need to work hard so that our play can be successful as well!)

t/n: *This is a video of loach scooping dance to get better idea of what the dance looks like: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uNZCjUJ1u3g < Chapter 2 | Masterlist | Chapter 4 >

[pass-the-bechdel]

Teen Wolf season six (part 1) full review

How many episodes pass the Bechdel test?

90% (nine of ten).

What is the average percentage per episode of female characters with names and lines?

42.52%

How many episodes have a cast that is at least 40% female?

Six, just over half.

How many episodes have a cast that is less than 20% female?

None.

How many female characters (with names and lines) are there?

Seventeen. Nine who appear in more than one episode, six who appear in at least half the episodes, and two who appear in every episode.

How many male characters (with names and lines) are there?

Twenty. Thirteen who appear in more than one episode, nine who appear in at least half the episodes, and one who appears in every episode.

Positive Content Status:

Standard for this show, i.e. decidedly higher quality than most of what’s on tv, with dynamic variety in powerful female characters, emotionally mature and expressive male characters, and a loving, up-front embrace of queer sexuality. Nothing stands out as especially wonderful about it all this season, but it’s an average mark against which other shows regularly pale (average rating of 3).

General Season Quality:

Fantastic! Easily their most intellectually heady concept thus far in the series, and they do some wonderful crazy things with it. 

MORE INFO (and potential spoilers) under the cut:

Their best male:female ratio yet!  The majority of episodes at/around gender balanced, zero of them wildly male-dominated! Almost a complete Bechdel pass, which isn’t much of a thing to crow about, but at least they tended to pass significantly with the passes they had, rather than a roster of single-line-single-pass episodes. And they didn’t score a raised content rating out of the bunch, but content ratings are variable based on series standards, to an extent: if the representation in this season were mirrored in, say, a Stargate season, I’d be gushing about what a fantastic turn of events that was. I have sometimes wondered if I was too generous with Teen Wolf’s scores in the past, but compared to pretty much everything else I’ve reviewed? Nah, it’s deservedly up the top of the heap. It has set a lovely high standard for itself, and failing to outstrip that standard still leaves it above and beyond most every other standard around, so. It’s a very good problem to have. It’s the right kind of problem.

That happy ratio is owed in part to the challenge which informed the entire season: how to keep the show alive without Dylan O’Brien as a regular? This isn’t the first show I’ve reviewed that has juggled the loss or limited availability of a primary actor, but it is easily the one that has done so with the greatest success. The X Files strangled itself in its original run by pretending that Mulder was still the centre of its universe even in his absence, refusing to commit to plot advancement with its new characters and format. The Librarians has made explaining away Flynn’s latest departure into the tool that shapes each season’s arc, and it’s wearing very thin (and has at this point possibly contributed to the show’s cancellation). Stargate SG1 made more structurally sound decisions with the dilemma that initially worked, but they turned into awkward as Hell character moves later down the track (and I will be SALTY FOREVERRR!!!). Teen Wolf wisely did not introduce a new replacement character to misuse and be uncomfortable with and ditch as soon as possible, and while it does make Stiles’ absence a centrepiece and driving force of the season, it does so without allowing that to choke off personal narratives or other plot threads for the characters who remain. The characters all continue to function, and we see the empty space that Stiles has left in their lives and how that affects them, but there’s no implication that they or the show cannot function without him, and that’s a compliment to Stiles, not an insult. It’s not that he’s the glue that holds the whole thing together, but he is irreplaceable, in the cast and in the lives of his friends, and this season is a celebration of him at the same time as being a soft introduction to the way that the show can keep moving forward without him in the future. The question everyone would have been asking before this season was ‘can Teen Wolf still work successfully without its secondary character, fan-favourite, and arguably best actor?’, and obviously I think they answered that with a resounding but respectful ‘YES’.

The absence of Stiles also allows a decisively larger space for the rest of the characters to move in, since he was never a character to be shuttled off and underused of a season - to the extent that he has been the centrepiece of another past season already. I do wish that Lydia stepping up to fill that space was less anchored around her blossoming romance with Stiles, and not only because - as established in the individual episode posts - I feel like they tried too hard and overplayed the OTP card, and I didn’t really buy that the bond was as profound as they wanted us to believe. Regardless of where you stand on the relationship itself, the reality was that Lydia had an awful lot of screen time that was not about her, and obviously this blog is not here for female characters having their personal stories co-opted by dudes. Arguably, the same fate would have befallen any character who was used as the primary conduit for the Stiles side of the storyline, but I’d argue back that if it had been Scott, as the lead character on the show he would be able to balance that weight (plus his established long-term relationship with Stiles would make it easier since it’s already part of the backbone of the series, whereas the official blossoming of a relationship with Lydia and Stiles is a new development being added on top of all the pre-existing emotions at play). The Sheriff, likewise, could take the weight of Stiles’ absentee narrative without having his character drowned out by it, because Stiles is his son and he has always played a supporting role for Stiles, for that obvious reason. The loss of Stiles is successfully used as a lens through which to further explore the Sheriff as an individual here, and it’s one of the best parts of the story. Lydia, on the other hand, as her own character who does not exist within the narrative because of her relationship with anyone else, was swamped by the Stiles arc and allowed no real exploration of her own; the closest she got to her own stuff was the prospect of being the sole survivor of Beacon Hills, and that was a nonstarter. As such, while I mostly applaud the way Stiles’ absence was handled, I cannot ultimately condone what it did to Lydia, and I can’t help but wonder how that dominance of her arc could have been softened and improved by removing the forced romantic angle. I’m reminded of how they fumbled the introduction of Malia around getting her with Stiles, and the awkward attempt to set Stiles up with Cora Hale before that, and the messy Stiles/Erica dynamic before that. I think this show just didn’t know how to give Stiles a love interest in an organic story manner, and the unfortunate side effect each time has been the detriment of the female characters who are assigned to him, which makes Stiles’ love life one of the least lovely representational aspects of this entire series. Eek.

The good news is, my gripe with the way they handled Lydia is my only serious beef with an otherwise stellar season; it had other imperfections, certainly, and I wouldn’t call it their best, though it had moments when it looked that way. I coulda done without Theo, to be honest, and I’m not sure he added anything necessary to the season. Malia was kinda under-played, though I don’t mind too much because she was still a strong presence, her personal plot stuff was subtle and that’s not a bad thing. Hayden was more underplayed, and that’s less ok because she’s newer and not as clear a character as Malia, plus I feel like Theo in the last couple of episodes could have been traded out for Hayden and it wouldn’t mess up anything (valuable story time taken up by Theo scenes in general is something worth frowning about). They didn’t really explain why Douglas could control Parrish, which left our poor Dreamboat as a pawn for most of the season for no apparent reason beyond it being narratively convenient. Also they had some weirdly-spent time in the late-mid episodes of the season (starting from the same episode Theo returned...) that could have been better paced and structured to make the finale even stronger. I could sit here and complain and nitpick, but these are ultimately fairly minor quibbles (many of which can be narrowed down to one central culprit: Theo) that prevent this from being a series-best season in my eyes, though it’s still up there as a top contender and when the season was on point, it looked unstoppable. They still successfully turned in some excellent television despite the loss of one of the show’s best assets, and they still told a story about metaphysical existence that was coherent and consistent and never talked down to its audience, and that’s really something to be happy about. They still gave us a Nazi Alpha werewolf in a subplot that was as outrageous as it was restrained, plus they made good use of Corey, whose presence I was not sure would work out in the long run for the show. I will always be available to rail against unnecessary romances and unnecessary Theos, but that doesn’t change the fact that this show remains a delight and a blessing, not only in terms of the positive representation it offers this blog but also for the wild, bombastic, unashamed imagination it offers us all.

[sinrau]

President Trump returns to the White House from Walter Reed medical center on Monday. Win McNamee/Getty Images

One day after President Donald Trump posted a video on his Twitter account that raised more questions about his health than it answered, he called into Maria Bartiromo’s Fox Business show for his first live interview since he announced his positive test for the coronavirus nearly a week ago.

Trump sounded hoarse, but ultimately the interview will likely raise more questions about his mental than physical health. That’s because over the course of an hour, Trump made comments that were nonsensical — even by his standards — about a variety of topics, including the coronavirus and how he possibly got it, and his desire that his political rivals be prosecuted for unspecified crimes just weeks out from the election.

The interview began with Trump announcing, “ I’m not going to waste my time on a virtual debate ” and that he will pull out of next week’s scheduled second debate with Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden, which is to be held remotely because of Trump’s coronavirus diagnosis.

Trump clearly wanted people to believe that his reasons for doing so are about his objections to the format, but the rest of his public therapy session with Bartiromo suggested his team might also have concerns about the debate turning out to be even more of a debacle than the widely panned performance at the first debate last week.

“Remember this: When you catch it you get better, and then you’re immune”

As you’d expect, Bartiromo began by asking Trump a string of questions about his health and how he’s feeling after his hospitalization and at least two coronavirus-related health crises. Trump responded with wild boasts — “I‘m back because I’m a perfect physical specimen, and I’m extremely young” he claimed — and dangerous lies.

Echoing the line he’s recently been pushing about how Americans shouldn’t let the coronavirus dominate their lives, Trump told Bartiromo, “Remember this: When you catch it you get better, and then you’re immune.”

“Remember this: when you catch it you get better, and then you’re immune” — this is a lie. There are already documented cases of people getting coronavirus twice. pic.twitter.com/auXWPN5F90

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 8, 2020

But not everyone gets better. The coronavirus has killed 210,000 Americans and counting and has ruined the health of thousands of others who survived. Furthermore, there are documented cases of people being infected more than once, so it is not true that someone who gets Covid-19 ends up being “immune.”

As the White House refuses to say when Trump’s last negative coronavirus test occurred — fueling speculation that he may have exposed Biden to it at last week’s presidential debate — Trump suggested he might’ve gotten infected by Gold Star families at an event that took place the day after a reckless event nominating Judge Amy Coney Barrett to the Supreme Court, which has been linked with a number of cases.

“I met with Gold Star families. I didn’t want to cancel that,” he said. “I can’t say, ‘Back up’ … they wanna hug me and they wanna kiss me, and they do.”

“I met with Gold Star families. I didn’t want to cancel that … I can’t say, ‘back up’ … they wanna hug me and they wanna kiss me, and they do” — Trump on now suggesting Gold Start families gave him coronavirus pic.twitter.com/7F2dBzRFgi

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 8, 2020

Blaming military families for his coronavirus diagnosis is on brand for Trump, but there’s no reason to believe it’s true. And instead of doing robust contact tracing to determine the origins of the White House case cluster, the Trump administration has instead tried to sweep the whole issue under the rug and move on with campaigning as quickly as possible.

Regardless of how he got it, Trump wants people to believe he’s the first person in the world to contract the coronavirus and feel better less than a week later. Despite his haggard voice and sickly appearance in the Twitter video he posted Wednesday, Trump told Bartiromo he feels “perfect.” He said he hadn’t been tested for coronavirus recently but added, “ I’m essentially very clean.”

Trump’s authoritarian rhetoric about Democrats is completely over the top

On the topic of Wednesday’s vice presidential debate, Trump’s analysis was basically limited to smearing Sen. Kamala Harris as a “ communist ” and “ monster.” Without a shred of irony, Trump repeatedly made dark insinuations about Biden’s health, claiming at one point that the former vice president “won’t make it two months as president.”

But arguably even more unhinged was Trump’s repeated calls for Attorney General Bill Barr to bring charges against Biden, Barack Obama, and Hillary Clinton for unspecified crimes, just weeks before the presidential election.

“Unless Bill Barr indicts these people for crimes — the greatest political crime in the history of our country — then we’ll get little satisfaction,” he said. “And that includes Obama and it includes Biden … we have everything … I say, Bill, we have plenty.”

“Unless Bill Barr indicts these people for crimes — the greatest political crime in history of our country — then we’ll get little satisfaction … and that includes Obama and that includes Biden” — Trump calls for Obama and Biden to be charged with crimes pic.twitter.com/g4hVYx98ZJ

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 8, 2020

Later, as Bartiromo tried to bring the interview to an end, Trump shouted, apropos of nothing, “Why isn’t Hillary Clinton being indicted?!”

To be clear, Trump is not making a credible accusation in saying that Biden, Obama, or Clinton actually committed crimes. But he appears to be trying to recreate October 2016, when he exploited the FBI’s renewed attention on the Clinton email investigation to damage her just enough to eek out his victory in the Electoral College.

The problem for Trump is that polls currently show him trailing Biden by about nine points nationally — a spread far wider than the lead Clinton enjoyed over Trump at a comparable point in the 2016 campaign. Instead of grappling with that reality, however, Trump told Bartiromo “I don’t believe the polls” and touted MAGA boat parades and truckers.

“They have a boat thing, they have 5,000 boats, they have thousands of trucks all over the country. I don’t believe the polls,” he said.

“I don’t understand it. I don’t believe ’em … they have a boat thing, they have 5,000 boats, they have thousands of trucks all over the country. I don’t believe the polls” — Trump on polls showing him trailing Biden by a dozen or more points pic.twitter.com/Y072VS7VKq

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 8, 2020

While it might be tempting to surmise that Trump’s compromised health has resulted in his odd behavior since his coronavirus diagnosis — including a number of bizarre photo ops and incoherent, angry binges of posting on Twitter — the truth is all of this is more or less on brand for Trump.

For instance, during his interview with Bartiromo, Trump repeatedly made a total mess out of easy questions about what he hopes to accomplish in a second term. But mangling softball questions of that sort has been a staple of his Fox News interviews going back months.

Asked what he wants to accomplish in a second term, Trump says “I have done more for Black community than any president except Abraham Lincoln.” He remains unable to answer this extremely basic question. pic.twitter.com/c9NWho6QLX

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 8, 2020

Ultimately, to the extent that Trump’s interview with Bartiromo indicates he’s feeling better physically, that’s a good thing. But amid questions about the side effects of his ongoing Covid-19 treatments, he will need to do more to convince voters he is mentally and emotionally prepared for the rigors of the presidency — and the campaign trail.

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Trump just did his first TV interview since his coronavirus diagnosis. It did not go well.

[thebluemeany]

Alexander Siddig Master Post: What to watch and where to watch it

WATCH: Good Candy

Peaky Blinders: most shows mash up all their cool shots with a soundtrack for their trailer. Peaky Blinders is that, only all the time. It’s beautiful, slick and oddly soulless: like a Vanity Fair photoshoot come to life. Siddig’s only in the romantic subplot of Series Three (£9.49 Amazon), but wait to buy as it’s on Netflix from September.

Cairo Time: Set in Egypt. Nice little love story. Surprisingly British in a repressed ‘I’d better go/ yes you better go’ sense. Except they all drink coffee rather than tea and smoke hookah. On YouTube. Worth cost of DVD.

Hannibal: Elephants crossing the Alps on a BBC Drama budget: what’s not to like? Actually done very well and in a sort of documentary style. Added bonus that Scipio is Rose Tyler’s Dad. On YouTube.   ☩

Spooks: Nest of Angels episode: Traumatic. Remember seeing it as a kid in 2003 before UK suicide bombers were a thing. It’s harder to watch now. But definitely do as it’s a bold early attempt to tackle a lot of issues. It was and still is a brave piece of drama. On YouTube.   ☩

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine: 7 Series, all available on Netflix: hour after hour of episodes. Say goodbye to at least two months of your life. Noticeable increase in quality and complexity Series 4, 5, 6.

Lawrence After Arabia: interesting, well written and with a young Ralph Fiennes. Pace and style is more like a play than a film. Can rent for £4.00 on Amazon.

WATCH DEPENDING ON YOUR TASTE:  aka. The Marmite flavoured Liquorice

Doctor Who - 1001 Nights (audio play): Really neat idea at the core. Doesn’t really get to Siddig’s story until episode four, but listening to the other parts really adds to the build-up. Yes, it’s £12.99, but it’s made by Big Finish (all round reliable candy makers) who employ a lot of old UK actors & writers, so resist urge to torrent.

Waking the Dead:  Endgame part 1 and part 2. Don’t be fooled by the CSI set up - this is a level up in violent and gruesome. You can watch it on the BBC YouTube channel for £1.99.  ☩

The Phantom of the Opera (audio play): faithful to the novel. Adapted by a Dalek. Good Commuting Material. Tad expensive at £12.99. Slightly cheaper if you use monthly credit on Audible.

Syriana – complex little film, full of a great cast. Intriguing, realistic and with worrying similar themes to Lawrence After Arabia but set a century later. Tad heavy going. Available free on Amazon prime.  ☩

The Flat Earth (audio play): Weirdly like Lost. Don’t listen to it on a flight. I think the writer may have been going for a sense of the transcendent in a way that was meant to be life affirming. But it actually conjures up some pretty horrific mental images…so, yeah… part 1, part 2  ☩

OKAY IF YOU’RE BORED: aka. Chewing Gum

Inescapable: the landscape is shot nicely but the story is dull. £5.10 to download on Amazon, but you can rent for 99p on iTunes which is fine because it’s not a film for repeat viewing.

True Love: only improvised drama series broadcast ever on BBC One. Turns out there is a reason for that: actors need writers.  Siddig is in episode four, which is the least mundane of the bunch. Bonus of Jane Horrocks.

Doomsday: post-apocalyptic movie. Oddly similar ‘flee to Scotland’ vibe as Reign of Fire below.  Not done well. 99p on Google Play, but seriously just go watch the infinitely better 28 Days Later instead.  ☩

Doctor Who – Sisters of the Flame/ The Vengeance of Morbius (Audio play): Worth it to hear Siddig play a centipede. ‘Cause its radio you just hear the hundreds of feet pattering every time he enters. £8.99 so try and buy when Big Finish have a deal on. Part one is both better and has more Siddig than part two. ☩

Un Homme Perdu:  version in Arabic & French but I can’t find a copy with English subtitles. That said, there’s not a lot of dialogue: if your French is moderate like mine you can muddle through. Intention kind of reminded me of the British 60s film Blow-Up. Kind of dull in an ‘art-film’ way even without language barrier.  

24 - Season 6: By this point of watching the back catalogue, I’ve got to admit I was getting pretty fed up of variations on Islamic Extremism stories. Siddig’s in episodes 2 – 7 and 9. £7.99 for whole series on Amazon, but low res version available on Dailymotion.  ☩

Reign of Fire: so the poster looks AWESOME (dragons destroying London, hell yes!). But that all happens off screen. Lacking dragon destruction, Siddig, female characters or emotional stakes. Contains FAR too much Matthew McConaughey. Rent for £2.48 to watch Christian Bale valiantly attempt to make the best of a bad job.

BARELY IN: aka Empty calories

Game of Thrones: you’ve probably seen the whole series already. If you want to watch just the episodes with Doran in, these are limited to Series 5: episodes 2, 6, 9, 10 and Series 6, episode 1. The entire globe has downloaded it illegally already, but ignoring that, you can buy it on Google Play for £1.99 per episode. ☩

Turmanbay (audio series): available free on BBC iplayer. Game of Thrones but on the radio. Bit repetitive.

Atlantis: in various episodes across Season 1. Scrappily put together and feels like a kids programme. It’s £12.49 to download on Amazon but I wouldn’t bother. 

Primeval: Theoretically in all of Series 4 and 5 – but in reality very little actual scenes until last two episodes of Series 5 (and even then, the amount of acting is debatable). Crappy production values and scripts lacking depth. If you really want to watch it, its £6.99 to stream on Amazon. ☩

Strike Back: Episodes 5 and 6: SAS video game masquerading as a TV show, or one of those books where the cover has a desert and a bullseye on it and the name of the author is in bigger print that the title. Generic variation on Islamic Extremism story…again… ☩

Doctor Who – The Wreck of the Titan: It’s not bad, just a sort of average Sixth Doctor story and for £12.99 you can live without it.

Merlin: meh, not worth it. Series 1, Episode 10: On Netflix. Better than Atlantis and Primeval though. ☩

The Nativity Story – feels like something they make you watch in school. Pretty, but totally lacking humanity or emotion. Part with Alexander Siddig as the Angel Gabriel is here.

DON’T WATCH: Just plain bad

Clash of the Titans: APPALLING MOVIE. WARNING, WARNING. DO NOT WATCH. Can rent for £3.00 on Amazon, but again DO NOT WATCH.  Should also be under ‘barely in’.

The Diary of River Song: “I went to a marvelous party” episode (audio play): Story is boring and heavy handed on the allegory. Add to that the fact it costs £30.00(eek!) makes it a ‘skip it’.

OTHER/ STUFF I CAN’T FIND

Recon: Seriously does this movie even exist? I can’t find it anywhere. Possibly just an elaborate front set up as a tax dodge…

The Big Battalions: missing, presumed wipe. I work near the BFI so went in to see if they have a copy. They didn’t even have a record it exists. Still, it was made by Carnival Productions (who thirty years later churn out Hollow Crown & Downtown Abbey) so was probably good with high production values.

Wild Arabia - documentary narration kindly recommended by little-Vulcan for its ‘dope landscape shots’. On Netflix

[constantfluxx]

Also, I have a new prompt! How do you feel about genderswap? Returning from a mission one of our four favorite shadowhunters (aka jace) does reply to one children "trick" just for the fun of it, but it turns out that that children is a seelie/warlock and turns jace, clary, Alec and izzy in the opposite sex for a day.

👻The Spook Cruise👻

Port of Call: Shadow Squad!Itinerary: Genderswap Trick! ♀️😈♂️Captain: @thefandomicaopens ✨

[-submit a prompt-]

“Trick or treat~?”

The four Shadowhunters stopped dead in their tracks, hesitantly turning to glance over their shoulders at the young, sweet voice that had sang out from behind them. They stared at the child, puzzling over her question for a long while until Clary at last finally replied, “I’m sorry, what was that?”

The little girl beamed up at them. “Trick or treat?” she repeated.

She was dressed in a cheap, knee-length dress of layered, sheer fabric. Her hair was done up in braids and decorated with bows, and glittering purple-and-pink makeup danced across her round, cherub-like cheeks. A pair of wings flopped unevenly from her back, a kind of hose material stretched over thin, wire frames, the whole piece hung from her arms by thin, elastic bands. One hand held out a plastic bucket shaped after a Jack-o-Lantern, and the other clutched a tiny, sparkling blue stick that ended in a thick, pearlescent star stuck upon a tuft of white down feathers.

Clary smiled wearily at her, crouching precariously to be a bit more level with the little girl. “You’re a fairy princess, are you?” she asked, guiltily eyeing the girl’s empty bucket.

“A fairy, yes!” the child giggled, moving her bucket closer to Clary. “Trick or treat?”

Jace’s patience was growing thin. Beaten, worn, and covered in a mixture of sweat, blood, and demon ichor, all of them were far too exhausted to be dealing with a random child’s Halloween antics, to be honest. He simply voiced their weariness the soonest, and the loudest, reaching down to pull Clary back up to a stand. “Look, kid, do we look like we have any candy on us?”

Izzy glared at him. “Jace, be nice,” she hissed, though there was something in her tone which dually thanked him for the interjection. Without it, she imagined Clary would have conversed with the kid all night long, and it’d be well past midnight before any of them finally got to shower.

The girl turned her large, pleading eyes to Alec. So far, he’d remained withdrawn and silent, arms folded across his chest. His eyes narrowed at the little girl, trying to ignore the way her innocent charm tugged at his heartstrings. Children had always claimed a soft spot in his heart, but something felt off with this one in particular - something unseen, unheard, unfelt.

“So… trick, then?” she somberly asked, her long lashes drifting lazily up and down her eyes.

“Yeah, sure,” Jace grumbled, urging Clary towards the rest of the group before turning around himself. “Trick.”

Still watching the little girl, Alec was the only one to catch the fleeting gleam in her eyes as a wicked grin broke across her face. “Okay!” she chirped, half-hopping after Jace and lifting her toy wand. “Trick!”

“Huh?” Jace grunted, jerking away from the sudden touch of the plastic star to the flesh of his wrist. Whirling upon the child, he meant to irritably scold her, but already the girl had turned and began skipping off, her bucket swinging haphazardly from the crook of her arm and her wings bouncing erratically from her back. He rolled his eyes, then turned to lead them the rest of the way into the Institute. “Kids. What a nightmare.”

Alec woke the next morning feeling… heavy, strangely enough. Probably because he’d spent the night at the Institute, he figured. Sleeping simply wasn’t the same without Magnus by his side, but by the time they’d actually finally gotten back from the mission he’d been barely awake enough to shed his soiled clothes, much less make the trek back to the loft. He groaned, rolling onto his side to try and eek out a few more minutes’ sleep.

He frowned. His arm felt… higher than it should be. Just how many covers had he slept with, anyway? He couldn’t be too surprised - he had to make up for the absence of another body, after all. He peeked an eye open to check…

…then shrieked. A horrified hand clapped against his mouth the very moment the sound escaped him. Meanwhile, he’d thrown himself out of bed with such frenzy his feet got caught in the twist of his sheets and he crashed upon the floor. Still, the pain that now throbbed through his rear and the back of his head did nothing to quell the panic exploding through his every limb. He shot to his feet and scrambled across the room, barreling his way into view of the room’s mirror.

No way. It’s impossible. It can’t be.

And yet, as he stood staring at the reflective surface, eyes glazing slowly up and down the figure staring back at him, a deep revulsion twisted his innards, and a hand moved to cover his mouth in stunned horror.

“By the Angel,” he whispered, too shocked by what he was seeing to be bothered by the far-too-honeyed sway of his voice. Full hips, smoothed limbs, rounded breasts… I’m… a woman… ?!?!

“Alec!”

He jolted out of his stupor at the voice, diving towards his dresser to frantically rummage through the sparse pile of clothes he kept at the Institute. “J-Just a sec!” he yelled back, lowering his voice as much as could to try and keep it normal-sounding. He was… mostly successful, but it still wasn’t right, a fact that irritated him more than he cared to admit.

In any case, he had far more pressing concerns. He’d managed to find a shirt that had been large enough on him that it could handle his newly-added mass, though the way it stretched was rather… well, obscene. Unfortunately, none of his jeans came even close to making it over the curve of his swollen hips, and all of his sweatpants were at the loft. At the very least, he wore his boxers baggy enough that they fit him now with still just the slightest bit of wiggle-room. He’d have to make do with that, though he didn’t see how in the nine Hells he was going to be able to even leave the Institute at this rate.

Maybe Magnus can portal me home, and then—

“ALEC! By the Angel, open the door!!!”

Alec practically tripped over his room’s sparse furniture in his mad dash to answer the door. He threw himself against it, hand grasping the metal knob between two clawed fingers, and finally yanked his door open, still wide-eyed and panicking.

Immediately, a blush consumed his face, much to his embarrassed frustration. Some guy was staring back at him - he quickly looked Alec head-to-toe, bringing Alec to throw his arm across his chest. “Wh-Who the Hell are you?!” he demanded, half-shied behind his door. He’d been expecting… Well, he wasn’t really sure who, because the voice hadn’t sounded anything like Jace, but at least someone he recognized from the Institute. This person certainly did look familiar, but in a way which disturbed him to the core: aside from the hair that flowed like an inky river down to just below his shoulders, the man looked uncomfortably similar to Alec himself.

After a moment of shock, the man suddenly smirked, then reached out to comb his fingers in Alec’s hair. “Damn, I’d look pretty cute with short hair.”

Without a second thought, Alec smacked the hand away from him. “What the fuck do you—” He broke off when his eyes fell to the man’s chest, then widened at the thick, black Nephilim rune situated perfectly centered between his pecs. His expression grew wide with realization, causing the man to laugh as Alec finally gasped, “…Izzy?!”

Izzy laughed, then pushed her way past Alec, ignoring her brother’s endured stupor. “The one and only, big brother!” She turned and eyed him again, chuckling, “…Big sister? Hmm…”

Alec scowled, grabbing the nearest thing to him - the thigh holster hanging on the wall, apparently - and throwing it at her. “This isn’t funny, Iz! What the hell happened to us?!”

“Not just us,” she clarified, catching the thigh holster easily enough and turning it over thoughtfully in her hands. “I just came from Jace and Clary’s room. Imagine how awkward that would have been to wake up to!” The moment she mentioned it, she looked up and tapped her chin in thought. “You think Clary swings both ways?”

“I don’t know, and I don’t care,” Alec grumbled, snatching his thigh holster out of his sister’s hands. “What are we going to do? I can’t go out looking like this!” As if there were any question about what he referred to, he gestured wildly up and down his body, his exasperation clear in the erratic movement.

“No kidding,” Izzy remarked, her face making no attempt to hide her opinion of his outfit. Turning around, she started stripping off her clothes - her black slacks and a peep-holed top that now hung a little loose on her now-squared body. “Come on, you can wear this, and I’ll borrow yours.”

Alec quickly shut the door and scurried over to his sister, catching her shirt mid-air and gawking at it. “You gotta be kidding me.”

She turned to him with a raised brow, plucking the sleeve of his too-tight shirt. “Unless you’d rather wear that and have your tits bursting at the seams all day.”

Absolutely not. Alec glared at Izzy, then grumpily pulled off his shirt and replaced it with his sister’s. To his great relief, she’d modified it to contain its own bra pads, smoothing everything out nicely without him having to endure a too-tight chest harness digging into his skin on all sides. The top fit him perfectly, as did her slacks, and when he turned around to observe himself in the mirror he was relieved to find everything as normal-looking as possible… save for the part where he was still quite female.

“Alright,” Izzy sighed, fastening Alec’s belt around her hips and straightening out the shirt she’d commandeered. The look she gave her reflection seemed none-too-pleased with the outfit, but it’d have to suffice. She strode past him to the door, the silver bangle hanging about her wrist one of the few things still betraying her true identity. “Let’s find the other two and figure out what we’re going to do about this.”

Alec sighed with grateful relief, grabbing his bow, quiver, and thigh holster and rushing out after her. “Yes. Please.”