#nikolai: it's true enough

[oceantornadoo]

ch1 something borrowed something blue (mafia!price x simon's sister!reader)

masterlist | next

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“Yer gettin’ married next week.”

You scoff at your brother staring at his Scotch whisky like it holds the answers to the universe.

“And you’re the king of Egypt. Funny, Simon.” He doesn’t laugh. Instead, he glances at Johnny, his husband and right-hand man. The two have a silent conversation, a head twitch followed by a pursing of lips. Johnny’s lips are cracked and split, something you can’t imagine your brother is attracted to. Superb mental health does not run in your family.

Johnny rises out of his chair, a wooden thing that creaks with effort, and takes his leave. He ruffles your hair on the way out while you try, for the thirtieth time, to shove his side. You are, yet again, unsuccessful. He’s built like a tank.

“M serious, love. ‘Ve been in negotiations the past month. It’s happenin’ next Saturday, St Etheldreda's Church.” You run through a list of churches in your head. St. Ethledreda’s is not in Manchester. In fact, you’re pretty sure it’s not in your territory. Which means…

“Why’re you naming a church in London?” Simon’s quiet as his eyes bore holes into yours. This is one of his favorite tactics to use on his men - staying silent until they find the answer themselves. You hate when he uses it on you like you’re under his command and not his younger sister. 

“You can’t be serious.”

“We need an alliance an’ they offered.”

“Then write a fuckin’ treaty! Not a marriage certificate.”

“You know it doesn’t work like that.”

“It’s the 21st century.”

“Not in this family.”

That’s something you can’t argue against. Most people outside of your immediate circle don’t even know Simon’s married to Johnny, let alone into men. When he first came to power, you created a sob story for him - early marriage to his (female) childhood sweetheart, then fast-spreading cancer, ending with a man struck by grief. It allowed him a known reason for turning down arranged marriages while making him seem more human than your shared father. No one paid enough attention to you two as children to know the story wasn’t real, and fake certificates of marriage and death are a dime a dozen. Everyone knows he’s close with Johnny, his right-hand man, and that’s that.

“What about my bookstore?” It’s your pride and joy, plus it’s 95% legal. Mostly. 

“There’s bookstores in London.” London. Only 200 miles away, but it’s like another world. Another world where you can’t walk down the street where every single storefront owner knows who you are. Where the cops are on your family’s payroll and don’t blink an eye at the gun strapped to your hip. It doesn’t matter if you were raised away in your formative years, losing your accent and most concepts of slang that baffle you. It doesn’t matter if you only share a father with Simon, that your mother was a Riley employee and not Mrs. Riley. Manchester is your home. 

It doesn’t occur to you that you have a choice, mainly because you know you don’t. The firm, or mafia, gang, or whatever you want to call it, still operates as if women are objects to be traded and bought. Marriages are merely political agreements. Getting to run a bookstore, or cash-cleaning business, as a woman is almost unheard of where you’re from. Others might call you lucky, but it’s more like being a bird in a gilded cage. A glimpse of what a true, normal life might look like. Living in a flat above your store, hosting local book clubs, setting out free cookie samples - all to be ruined when Johnny stumbles through with a gunshot or the newest recruits are sent to grab more bullets from the basement. Every other week, you snap back from your daydream and remember that you’re a mafia princess at the end of the day, though duchess seems more adequate since the Rileys don’t have that big of a territory.

“And who is my husband-to-be in London?”

“John Price.”

“I’d rather marry Nikolai. In fact, I might just go elope.” Simon glares and you glare back. “I’m not marrying John Price.” You clarify, for emphasis. Simon leans forward in his office chair, looming over his desk like a puppet master. You’re in the chair across from him, crossing your legs casually like you’re not discussing your arranged marriage and potential future. “Contract’s done, love. Jus’ waitin’ on yer signature.” Your signature, the one change from the barbaric practices of old England. You could say no, but then Simon would have no choice but to cut you off. It would be a sign of weakness to the other families if he let a delinquent bastard half-sister run his decisions.

“I want to negotiate the contract.” It’s the closest your brother has ever been to rolling his eyes. They twitch with restraint, blonde lashes flickering. “This isn’t a TV show, kid. Yer not negotiatin’ yer bloody contract.” You uncross your legs, hands on your armrest like you’re about to leave. “Fine. Let me go call up the NCA, tell them all about my brother and his scary gang.” He sighs deeply, then pulls out his phone. “Bloody hell. Can’t wait t’ marry you off, fuckin’ arsehole.” You grab the bright pink stress ball on his desk, a stocking stuffer you gave him as a joke, and throw it at him. He doesn’t even bother to look up from his phone, huffing as the ball hits the side of his head. 

“Here.” He tosses you the phone that’s already ringing. There’s no contact name, just initials. JP. “Riley. Got a problem?” A smooth baritone emits from the phone’s tinny speakers. “Hope you’re not busy this weekend, future hubby. I can’t wait to see you.” Simon sighs at the consequences of his own actions. John’s silent on the other end, processing your words. Bit thick, that one.

“An’ why’s that, sweetheart?” It’s a term of endearment but he laces it with vitriol. “We’re having tea on Saturday at my store. Bring your contract and favorite lawyers. See you then!” You hang up before he can answer, tossing the phone back to Simon. He shakes his head at you.

“Smile, Simon. It’ll be nice to bond with your brother-in-law.”

This is going to be a very long marriage.

If you even get down the aisle.

-

Why does reader hate John? Why is she also a little shit? All will be revealed :)

[osamucide]

thinking abt bsd men after u leave a lipstick mark on their faceedd

this is an ages old ask but it really struck me today… anon you’re so right….

I know CHUUYA buys you the most expensive lipstick. He knows you don’t mind a decent drugstore lip if it means he doesn’t have to break the bank, but sometimes he can’t help himself—he loves to spoil you. He loves an autumny shade on you, one that almost matches his hair, but his favorite is that rich garnet Guerlain Rouge G, and he wears your $80 lipstick kisses all day like badges of honor. (He might even hairspray it a little so it doesn't sweat or rub off.) The last thing an enemy will see before Chuuya empties a clip in their skull is the deep red kiss mark you left on his jaw that morning before work <3

ANGO is not a shallow man, but I think he loves the old-money feel of having your lipstick marks all over him, especially near the corners of his mouth. Another one who won't hesitate to open up his wallet, I can see him seeking out velvety vintage lipsticks for you to smudge all over his shirt collar. He does hope that the pigment distracts from the blush dusting his face, though—no matter how many times you stain his pretty face, and no matter how hardnened of a gangster he is, he still gets all giddy and hot when you shower him in such affection. Might have to pull you into the nearest bathroom to see where the color looks stained elsewhere. . .

Your ever-enthusiastic NIKOLAI already thinks of your kisses as rewards, but this—oh, god, seeing the true red creme lipstick, the one you let him pick out, decorating the corners of his cheeks makes him absolutely glow. The gentle dot where you pecked the tip of his nose matches his aesthetic so well; he thinks he should go out like this all the time, you should do this every day, and he'll beg you for more, more lipstick kisses! Until you can hardly see an inch of his pale skin from the neck up. You'll just have to move to his hands next! It might look ridiculous, but he never feels more beautiful. How wonderful it is, he thinks, to be adored by you.

Now, BEASTZAI and his mental gymnastics. . .he'll flip the script in his mind and puff himself up with the notion that your lipstick kiss on his cheek is somehow another token of his ownership over you. After all, you're the only one he'd ever, ever, in a million years, allow close enough to his person to leave such a mark. He'll protest emptily about how it'll diminish his prestige in front of his subordinates, but it's not like they don't already know he's just as whipped for you as you are for him—and he knows this too deep down, so he won't move to wipe it off. In fact, he finds himself going out of his way to preserve it all day until evening when he's home and you can cover him in the other kind of kiss mark <3

And finally, I think canon timeline DAZAI would eat it up for the purest reasons of any of these men. Of course he'll tease you about it, lecture you playfully about how insatiable you are—you just have to let everyone know he's yours, huh? But, really, when he shuffles off to the bathroom and catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror with your tender kiss preserved on the arch of his cheekbone, tears threaten his lashline. He can't pull his eyes away from it. He won't cry, he can't fuck it up—but he lets his fingers hover over it, amazed at such concrete evidence of your love for him. He tries not to think about it too hard while he barges back out into the office where you've brought him lunch, half-singing, half-begging for more lipstick kisses on the beautiful face of your beloved boyfriend, please!

[trueseeking]

contrary to his words, she highly doubts there would be anything remotely pleasurable about it, just more logistics to contrive. but it's not that that draws a laugh from her, finally. ❛ and on just which foreign prince are you planning to place the blame for my abduction? ❜ elia can't be bothered to point out the many ways in which it's as far-fetched a story as he could possibly conjure. ❛ I doubt any would appreciate the slander. ❜

she reins in her humor, stifles her laughter, and more somberly continues, ❛ but, no, while anyone who knows me might die of shock to know I said this, I think maybe I've had enough of unlikely stories. for now, at least. ❜ elia does possess enough self awareness to reflect, even as she says the words, that she's likely to recant them as soon as she's had a proper night's sleep — if not merely a nap. thus ends her solemnity. ❛ and, frankly, your meddling hasn't been great for my career so far. ❜

there was not one aspect of her life that went undisturbed by their misadventure, it seemed.

❛⠀ i can assist you with that. i have contacts in every port, and we can have a story about you being spirited away by a foreign prince for a private performance before word of your cancellation arrives. ❜ is it not so far from the truth, but elia does not need to know that. for her sake, he'll adopt every measure, take every action to erase the time she spent aboard this ship from her mind; it will become a passing memory, a nightmare without a name or a shore for it to take root in her mind. ❛⠀ it will be my pleasure to ensure it. ❜

there is no shortage of people who owe the privateer favors, and no shortage of courtiers who will hear soon that the prince of ravka has taken an interest in music. they'll flock to her shows, whisper they saw the elusive prince, and she'll have nothing to worry about. he can do that. he will do that. he has to do that.

[quarterlifekitty]

hello!! love your writing so much 💗

which guys do you think are more gullible? like could be guilt tripped or manipulated into doing things? and most importantly, which ones are faking going along with it so that they can turn the tables on you later on?

ok so, obvious but

cw: manipulation (this time it's reader doing it lol)

Most gullible award goes to Soap. He's the most outwardly emotional and completely wears his heart on his sleeve. He's obedient to a fault and he loves to please, so while it might not always be called manipulation, it would be really easy to lead him on if you wanted to get him to do things for you. Would Ghost let you do that to him? Not in a million years.

König is also incredibly easy to manipulate and guilt trip. He feels naturally guilty, anxious, and insecure over your relationship. He has constant imposter syndrome and is not-so-secretly terrified that you'll realize what he's really like, and will leave him. You could very easily harness that fear and desperation to cling to you directly into control and get him to do things for you.

Ghost and Gaz both know when someone is tricking them. Gaz more or less always knows because he's an excellent reader of tone and intention. Ghost believes he always knows, but this isn't true. While it is much harder to manipulate him, he does have his own weaknesses, and if you know him well enough and have enough talent for acting sincere, you might be able to push just the right combination of buttons to get him to do what you want. But most of the time? Any "successful" manipulation of Gaz or Ghost will come back to bite you ten times as hard.

Nikolai, Price, and Rudy will do what you want, but it has nothing to do with manipulation-- you both know what's going on. It's an exchange. Nikolai's servitude is condescending, there's this sort of edge that implies he's doing this because you can't do it on your own, his competence somehow supersedes yours. Price likes to play the role of the "whipped" husband, it fits perfectly into his sort of nuclear-family-dynamic fantasy (@/pricegouge made a post about him preening when his wife calls him "well trained" in front of her friends and I believe in that 100%). Rudy is just plain worshiping you, and gets enough satisfaction from that on its own, really.

[atlabeth]

mine forever

request from @nghtwngs

pairing: nikolai lantsov x fem!tidemaker reader

a/n: SO sorry for posting this early and having to delete 💀 i was formatting and didnt realize i was not saving it as a draft lmao. but thank you for sending this in love!!! and PLEASEE send in as much nikolai as you want i miss writing for him so much

wc: 1.4k

warning(s): hurt/comfort. reader is insecure, nikolai is the sweetest as usual

join in on my 3k celebration!!

“You’re avoiding me.” 

Your eyes didn’t move away from the horizon when you heard Nikolai’s voice, though you felt your muscles tense. 

“Clearly not well enough,” you remarked. “Seeing as you found me.” 

“You know I’ll always find you,” Nikolai murmured. “But that means little if you will not talk to me.” 

Of course you were not talking to him. You did not know how to talk to him—not when you so clearly didn’t understand the issue plaguing you. 

All you’d ever known was the life of a Grisha. You were tested when you were young, revealed to be a Tidemaker, and whisked away to the Little Palace, where you’d been honing your abilities ever since. You rebelled against the one thing you knew, joined the side of the Sun Summoner, and now you were in the midst of a war for the very survival of your people. 

There were so few Tidemakers left after the Darkling’s massacre, which meant Alina and Nikolai were counting on you more than ever in their fight to reclaim Ravka. 

But when you needed your powers most, they disappeared. 

You— you just didn’t understand, because it didn’t make sense. You’d spent years studying the Small Science and how to wield it, how to manipulate the water around you no matter how miniscule. 

This was not merzost. You had never tampered with the way of the world, never attempted to bastardize the abilities you’d been granted.

Like called to like. There was a part of you that connected to the water, that allowed you the affinity for all of this.  

You had just… lost it. For no apparent reason. 

“There is nothing to talk about,” you stated simply. The cold of the railing shocked your fingers as you set your hand down, but you welcomed any sort of feeling. 

“Do not be ridiculous,” Nikolai said wryly. He came out onto the balcony and stopped beside you. You could see him looking at you through your peripherals, could feel his intent gaze. “Nobody avoids me unless they have a reason.”

You huffed a bitter laugh. “I certainly have a reason, moi tsarevich.”

“So we’ve gone back to titles?” Nikolai’s lips quirked up. “Shall I start referring to you as Grisha? Tidemaker, even?”

You scoffed. “That would be inaccurate.”

“Ah,” he nodded. “We’ve reached the root of the problem.”

“We hardly did anything,” you said. “Do you talk just to hear the sound of your own voice?”

“I do, as a matter of fact,” Nikolai said. “But you should know your scornful words have no effect when I’m aware of your true feelings.”

“If you are aware of my true feelings, you should know I would like to be left alone.” 

“You want to be left alone because you feel useless without your power,” he said. “Any man worth their salt would not fall to that, and fortunately, I’m worth quite a lot.” 

You finally turned to look at Nikolai, though you could not muster the full force of your anger when you did. He had that slight smile still, the glint in his eyes, and all you could think was that you didn't even deserve this kindness. 

“Because I am,” you said. 

He shook his head. “You are not. Far from useless, actually.” 

“You served in the First Army, didn’t you?” 

“I hardly see how that’s relevant—” 

“Just answer my question.” 

“...Yes,” he said. “I was infantry. The 22nd Regiment.” 

“And if you had lost the ability to shoot a gun, would you be allowed to stay on the front lines?” 

Nikolai shook his head. “I will not participate in hypotheticals to help you feel worse.” 

“Because you know it’s true.” You looked back out at the horizon—the sun was steadily setting. “I have no place here anymore.” 

He said your name with a slight huff. “That is not true.” 

“I’m not Grisha anymore!” you exclaimed as you whirled back to face him. “The only reason I have ever gotten anywhere— the only reason I am here, the only reason I ever met you in the first place— it is all because of my power.” You pulled your jacket tighter around yourself in the wake of a cold wind. The material was noticeably thinner than your kefta, but you could not bring yourself to wear it anymore. “I’m useless now. To— to Ravka, to the Second Army— to you.” 

His brows furrowed. “You are not useless to Ravka— and you could never be useless to me.” You averted your eyes, unable to meet the full weight of his softened gaze, and his frown deepened. “That’s what this is about then? 

“Don’t act like it’s so ridiculous,” you muttered. 

Nikolai had the nerve to laugh, and you glared at him. He held up his hands in defense, but he could not fully bite back his smile. 

“I apologize, lapushka, but I did not even consider that as an option for why you were so upset.” 

Nikolai took your hands in his, hands that had been the key to your power the entire life, that were failing you, and he held them like nothing else in the world mattered. “Do you know how absurd the thought of me not loving you is?” 

You glanced away, but Nikolai gently cupped your chin with a few fingers and tilted you back to meet his eyes. 

“Because it is,” he continued, letting his hand fall back down to grasp yours. “I love you with everything in me. I love you because you are you—not because of your powers. Not because you are Grisha.” 

“Who am I if I am not Grisha?” Your voice came out as little more than a whisper, near a desperate plea. You’d never felt weaker, never felt smaller. The only thing you’d known all your life had been ripped away from you, and you felt as if you’d been shoved into an endless void. 

Nikolai said your name softly as he squeezed your hands. “You are a soldier of great renown. A revolutionary on the right side of history. The most loyal friend someone can have. And lest you somehow manage to forget it, you are the woman I love.”

“You deserve better than—” you swallowed the lump in your throat. “—than some broken, failed Grisha.”

“You are not broken,” Nikolai murmured, and he never looked away from your eyes as he lifted your hand to press a kiss to the back of it. “We are merely on… a different path.” 

“A different path,” you repeated, and you could not help your wry laugh. 

“Yes,” he nodded. “And we will go down every step of it together. Do you understand that?” 

Nikolai fought for everything he had, despite his standing as a Lantsov. He was a soldier on the front lines, he rose through the ranks on the sea under a pseudonym, and now he was clawing his way through useless formalities in order to take back the throne that he deserved. 

And here you were—someone who was given everything because of some power inside you. And now you didn’t even have that. 

It just did not seem right. It did not make sense. For a man as powerful as Nikolai to stick by your side despite such a misgiving. 

“If you don’t, that is alright.” Nikolai shrugged. “I will just have to spend extra time showing you how much I revere your very being.” 

“Nikolai,” you murmured, and his grip on your hands tightened. 

“I cannot pretend to understand what you are going through,” he said. “I cannot lose what you have lost because I’ve never had it in the first place. But I can promise you wholeheartedly that we will figure out what is wrong. Together.” 

“And what if we don’t?” you asked. You couldn’t help it. 

“Then nothing will change,” Nikolai vowed. “Milaya, nothing can tear me away from you, whether you are Grisha or not. Do you understand that?” 

A part of you still could not. Who were you if you were not of use? 

But when you met Nikolai’s eyes, those beautiful hazel eyes that seemed to glow with the sunset, full of softness and admiration and love, you found that you could start to.

You may not have believed in yourself, but Nikolai did. And that had to mean something.  

“I’m beginning to,” you murmured. 

“Good,” he said, and his lips quirked into a smile. “But fear not, milaya. I hold enough love for you inside of me for the both of us in the meantime.” 

[creantzy]

Defying God - a parallel between Fyolai and Stavrovensky

The Demons brainrot is taking over, and you know what happens when I acquire a new interest: my brain WILL find a way to connect it to my other interests, whether I like it or not!! And this is essentially what it's about xD I've come here to present a parallel I found between Fyolai (Fyodor & Nikolai from BSD) and Stavrovensky (Verkhovensky & Stavrogin from "Demons" by Dostoevsky). Before I start I want to clarify a few things:

• I don't think these two pairings are similar, I just love picking up any crumbs of connections I can find between my interests, even if it'd count as reaching.

• This interpretation (in either character's case) is in no way "the only true way of looking at it". It's merely one interpretation out of many and I chose to focus on just a few aspects out of the many others there are to explore in these complex characters. 

• Feel free to add onto or disagree with anything I say! I'm interested in your thoughts :D

WARNING: There will be spoilers for Bungou Stray Dogs and Demons.

The reason Nikolai wants to kill Fyodor is because he feels affection for him. Emotions are a prison to him, and he basically seeks the opposite of what his emotions make him want to do. Thus, in the face of affection, which makes you want to be closer and wish the best for your friend, he does the opposite and decides to kill said friend, going directly against his feelings in an attempt to prove free will. But here I want to focus more on the "You want to defy God in order to lose sight of yourself" part, specifically the bit about God.

One part of my interpretation is that Nikolai associates God with control. If there is a God who controls all, how can there be a free will? He wants to go against Him and His creations (the human mind, morality, etc.) to prove that it's possible. But God is very abstract - the idea of God is influential but varies depending on cultures, etc. For this point, I'll use the example of the biblical God, or, more specifically, some attributes commonly assigned to the idea of God:

• omnipotence (all-powerful)

• omnipresence (all-present)

• omniscience (all-knowing)

What I am leading up to is the fact that these traits can, in one way or another, be applied to Fyodor. Fyodor's character represents everything Nikolai wants to defy. Nikolai hates control; he wants to fight the idea of God and prove the possibility of complete independence. Fyodor (though not in a "direct" way) could be seen as a symbol for God. He knows everything, he is always present (metaphorically and sometimes literally, the way he spawns sometimes I swear-), and he seems to control everything. Only few people actually see him, but he pulls the strings behind the scenes, and his power is felt everywhere. For Nikolai, to kill Fyodor is not just a protest against his feelings of affection, but can also be a symbolic act of defying "God", of killing "God", by killing Fyodor.

This is supposed to be very symbolic and not taken literally. I feel the need to repeat this because I personally dislike the notion of Fyodor as a literal God (and disagree with the idea of him having a God-complex), so this is merely about the God-like traits he possesses, like a "substitute" for the idea of God, and how it interacts with Nikolai's philosophy. (I've also exaggerated some points for the sake of simplification - for example, I don't actually believe Fyodor is in control of absolutely everything, etc.)

Moving onto Demons:

Pyotr Verkhovensky grew up religious and (assuming based on Stepan's description) with a fear of God.

Now he's an atheist and very anti-religious. He plans to overthrow society, and destroying religion + everything it preaches is part of that plan. But interestingly enough, he picks not himself as the official future "ruler", but someone else: Nikolai Stavrogin. He chooses Stavrogin to be the role of the leader in Verkhovensky's ideal society. But not exactly the "leader" in the traditional sense, because he wouldn't necessarily give Stavrogin all the power. He would simply use him as a "pawn" (for lack of a better word) while himself pulling the strings behind said society. With that, Verkhovensky puts someone else above himself, in a God-like position, but he wants to do it while still keeping full control over Stavrogin. By doing so, he would overcome his childhood fear of God because instead of being controlled by God, *he* will control God.

(Same case here, not the literal God, but the character who he assigns God-like traits to.)

I am undecided (with both Nikolai's and Verkhovensky's character) whether this could be read as a solely subconscious intention or if it would make sense as a conscious one as well. Given that both have a different "main" goal (Nikolai focuses on emotions and Verkhovensky on the revolution) I lean more towards thinking it's subconscious (if present at all - like I said, just interpretations!)

It doesn't help that Verkhovensky describes his vision of Stavrogin's leadership as "hidden": Everyone believes in him and his power, but only very few people are said to actually have laid their eyes upon him. When I first read this part, I was honestly reminded of Big Brother from Orwell's 1984, but eventually realised that similar things can be said about God as well.

While these are parallels, they don't come without differences. Nikolai needs Fyodor dead, Verkhovensky needs Stavrogin alive. Nikolai wants to kill Fyodor for a sense of freedom, Verkhovensky wants to keep Stavrogin for a sense of control. Yet both symbolic goals are bound to fail:

Fyodor turns out to be unkillable, and Stavrogin ends up dead.

At the end, "God" stays untouchable.

[mariamegale]

Alexey Luchin, former Ice Pick Lodge employee, has commented to support the allegations against Dybowski, giving more insight and making additional accusations regarding grooming, physical and emotional abuse.

One of the most noteworthy things is his claims about Dybowski's current relationship with IPL. According to Luchin, Dybowski has not cut any ties with IPL or vice versa, and is only claiming that to avoid alimony payments:

Nikolay formally removed himself from the company (IPL) in a legal sense, in order to avoid paying adequate alimony. The payments on the screenshots are as low as 100$, which isn't nearly enough. [...] He's still working, the maneur [sic] is only to avoid alimony. Though I must say, these days the team is "carrying" him mostly. New Ice-Pick Lodge is great, there are lots of motivated people who gre up on old Ice-Pick games and are doing their very best!

Full comment thread here.

I will also post his comments below, for those who may not have or wish to visit Reddit. Special thanks to user Winterlings for asking follow-up questions, and of course a massive applause to Luchin for being willing to share this under his own name.

As a former colleague (I worked on Pathologic 1, The Void, Cargo, and a bit of uncredited work on Pathologic 2), I am sad to confirm, that this is most likely true. There is a link to follow the ongoing court considering the child alimony payments, and it looks like there will be another one, considering recent occusations. (As link to Russian websites are banned, see original source in the mod comment. You will need a VPN to go further down the first link in the post to see the court progress, or use google translate on that link to bypass the need for VPNs) I know Nikolay well, from at least 2006, and unfortunatelly his "misbehaviours" have been an open secret for a long time, on which I didn't comment for two reasons. One - he is not the studio, and isn't involved much in development since The Void - do NOT take out your anger on the talanted and good people working of Pathologic 3. Second - I've been kind of a coward, until I've learnt in 2018 or so, that a girlfriend of mine was also groomed by him, while we were still dating, and since then I broke all ties with Nikolay. He has been a raging, violent and erratic alcoholic, a sociopath and a pathological liar all these years. I personally know at least 10 people who he harmed directly in relation to public accusations (but it's their stories to tell, not mine). He is a manipulative sociopath, that is very good with words, another reason why these stories only surfaced now. The reason I'm speaking up right now is because I figured that after the last ephebophilia and grooming accusations, that cost him his job as a univercity teacher, and danger of going to court, he would change his ways. But things have gotten worse and more rotten since then. There isn't a reliable "reputation institution" in Russian gamedev, but it must start at some point. I believe the best path for Nikolay would be to leave Ice-Pick Lodge to not tarnish their reputation with his own fuckups, and leave the current studio to work as is - they're doing a great job on Pathologic 3, and they once again should NOT be harrassed for a single person's misdeeds.

When asked about identity verification:

I'm easily googlable by my handle, my name is Alexey "The LxR" Luchin. Though my work is uncredited on both Pathologics ironically, but also I'm falsely credited on Knock-Knock, which I haven't worked on. Anyhow, it'll be easy to find me in the credits for The Void and Cargo and by traces of my active participation in building the early game communities on the forums. :) Also possibly another colleague of mine in this thread may verify that it is indeed me, though I'd understand if they wish to remain anonymous.

Whether or not we as a community should hold IPL as a company responsible for this in some way, or go through with some financial boycott, I am leaning more and more towards at the very least requiring some kind of statement. Not only because of what Dybowski has done in his personal life, although that's more than bad enough, but because this crosses the line into actively having an impact on the dev team, the games, and in turn the community. I want to be able to know that this is something they take seriously and that Dybowski is gone, before I give them more money. But that is just my stance, and any nuanced take is of course welcome.

[dicksoutforakutagawa]

bsd characters at metal shows with you

author's note: i go to metal shows a lot. i saw iron maiden live. metal shows are actually so fucking fun. but bring earplugs because the music is SO loud

other note: i have never seen anybody be flirted with or hit on at my local metal shows. apparently my local metal scene is full of very respectful people. i've been in mosh pits with a bunch of drunk 6'0+ men and felt perfectly safe and i think metal shows are beautiful for that

features nikolai, chuuya, atsushi, akutagawa, and dazai :3

nikolai

he is crowdkilling.

his six foot tall ass is in the mosh pit flailing like he's been electrocuted

nikolai is that one cunt in the pit who gets you with a fist to the face but then helps you stand up again. and his smile is too pretty for you to stay mad at, even though you can already feel the bruise forming

he is the guy who will drag you to the very front right up at the stage and headbang to hell and back

look at his long beautiful hair. you cannot tell me that he would not utilise this when headbanging

does not wear earplugs. he is raw dogging the hearing damage

stays for the whole set and very loudly cheers on the local bands as well as whatever big one has come touring

wears a band shirt and gets really sweaty. you're pretty sure he gave someone a concussion but, between the strobe lights and the way he's flailing, it was kind of hard to tell

will point out his favourite bands to you and tell you weird trivia you didn't previously know

he WILL try to make you get in the mosh pit with him. i'm sorry. it's unavoidable. he will accept a no but he will go mosh without you for a few minutes

if you mosh with him he will be absolutely fucking delighted. will probably kiss you (with tongue) in front of everyone because he is just Like That

headbangs at the front of the stage with you. when you both get dizzy, he grabs the railing and wraps his other arm around your waist. you're suddenly very thankful for the bad lighting because you can feel your entire face going red

he will walk you home but he will also invite himself inside because he is drunk. falls asleep on your bed before he can even take his shoes off. he makes up for it by making breakfast the next morning

akutagawa

reid said that you'd see him in the pit and think 'i could knock him over easily' and when you slam into him he doesn't move at all and i think this is so true

he stands on the edge of the mosh pit. he may only be like 5'8 but somehow nobody knocks him over

does not wear a band shirt. he rocks up in his lame gothic attire and is the prettiest boy there

he does not headbang much because it gives him headaches. he just stands there giving the band members a death glare

is actually REALLY enjoying the music

he does wear earplugs. he values his hearing

will buy you drinks but will bitch and moan about it. he is careful not to get drunk though because he sees those large men in the mosh pit beating each other up and he does NOT trust that

stays for the whole show. he paid for those tickets and he's not leaving

actually has a really good time but will never admit to being as much of a metalhead as he actually is

his favourite part is standing there next to you but he is very very shy. he might hold your hand if he's feeling brave enough but may also just resort to standing shoulder to shoulder

will not mosh with you if you ask him to but he will stand there to grab you in case you get knocked over

he spends about 50% of his time actually watching the musicians. the other 50% is spent looking at you and admiring you. he is secretly swooning over the fact that you enjoy metal as much as he does

will drive or walk you home. walks you right up to your door. he very shyly goes to kiss you goodbye but then gets nervous and kisses your forehead instead. when you grab him and kiss him properly his knees go weak and he nearly falls over

he is immediately trying to find more metal shows to go to once he gets home

atsushi

has never been to a metal show before

'no i won't need earplugs', he insists. the band starts playing. he immediately asks you to give him the earplugs

metal is not really his thing but he discovers that he enjoys headbanging and the general atmosphere

does not own a band shirt to wear to the show. he purchases one once he decides which band is his favourite

he stands at the back of the crowd near the bar because the music is too loud and he is scared of the mosh pit

(after a few drinks he gets brave enough to enter the pit and he discovers that his ultimate skill is knocking people over in the pit. he has a great time. he feels a little bad once he sobers up though)

stays for the whole show. cheers on all the bands but very quietly because he is slightly intimidated by the aggression

he has fun. he asks you after the show why they kept blaspheming christianity and you realise that you did not explain to him the histories of metal music

if you mosh with him he'll get very excited but he will also get nervous because he is vaguely aware of how much he's wrecking everyone's shit

he does buy you drinks. he does not have the funds for it but he will try to pay for drinks for the entire night. do not let him do this. the agency's pay is not good enough for him to afford this

spends the first band's entire set working up the courage to hold your hand. his hand is SO fucking sweaty and it is shaking a little bit because he's so nervous and excited to be here with you

if you buy him a band shirt he will get excited enough to kiss you. in front of the merch table. and also in front of everyone in line. his face goes BRIGHT red when he realises what he's done and it goes even redder when all the metalheads start clapping and cheering instead of making fun of him

he walks you home. he does not have a driver's license but he walks you home. he'll carry you bridal style if your feet hurt. he doesn't even realise how sweet he's being. he's just too worried about your sore feet

he keeps going with you but only to cheap local shows because his pay is shit

dazai

does not wear earplugs because he is stupid

he does not go in the mosh pit. he went to a show with chuuya when they were 16/17 and he got immediately knocked over and winded and has not been in the pit since

will buy you one round of drinks but you have to buy the next because unfortunately the agency does not pay him that well

he doesn't own any band shirts that still fit him. he wears his usual bandages and they smell very sweaty and terrible by the end of the show

he'll stay for the bands he likes. if you want him to stay for the whole show then he will, but usually he taps out after he's seen all his favourite bands

he stands at the back near the bar. he still vividly remembers entering the mosh pit as a skinny teenager and getting knocked into next tuesday and, given that he hates pain, he is not going anywhere near the mosh pit

he does not headbang. he just kind of bops his head to the beat

follows you like a puppy dog. as much as he wants to pretend to be cool and aloof, he cannot stop himself from trailing after you the entire show. even if you go near the mosh pit

will spend at least an hour psyching himself up to hold your hand. his hands are gross and sweaty when he eventually does it. he's too proud of himself to care

after he loosens up, he stands with an arm around your waist while he listens to the music. he decides that actually, metal music isn't so bad, especially when he's here with you

he walks you home. he has to consciously stop himself from giggling and kicking his feet when you kiss him goodbye

he will continue to go to shows with you but only cheap local ones

chuuya

chuuya gets right into it. he headbangs and sings along to the lyrics he knows. he can do a surprisingly good fry scream

he owns several band shirts. he forced dazai to attend multiple local metal shows in their youth and bought a shirt from every show. he wears his favourite band's shirt to the show and will buy you a shirt as well as himself

he buys you drinks. gets pleasantly drunk but not absolutely hammered

he enters the mosh pit and uses his gravity manipulation to weigh himself down so that his 5'3 ass doesn't get mashed into the ground

definitely wears earplugs. will also force you to wear earplugs. you cannot listen to metal if you go deaf

he also stays for the entire show and he cheers on all the bands

chuuya likes to stand at the very front up at the stage but will stand wherever you want to be

he proudly holds your hand

if you come up to stand at the railings with him, or if you mosh with him, he genuinely swoons and has to take a moment to stop himself from asking for your ring size

he makes sure not to send you flying in the mosh pit. he's considerate like that

he buys you as many drinks as you want. he will also buy you a band shirt. he'll buy you a band shirt from all the bands that performed if you ask him to

walks you home. kisses the back of your hand goodbye like a gentleman. is squealing to himself the whole way home because he's SO excited that you came to a show with him and the blush on your face when he kissed your hand was SO cute

is overjoyed when you want to continue going to shows with him. gets very excited and starts trying to take you to all the shows for his favourite local bands

[theanimeoftheblackbunnymask]

What type of yandere do you think sigma and nikolai would be?

Sure!

Links: {Masterlist} {Jouno and Tecchou Yandere Idea}

Nikolai Gogol (Yandere Idea)

Nikolai is a lot to deal with, privacy is no longer a thing. Nikolai will never give you moment of peace. He's always talking to you, throwing random quizzes at you, using his ability to either see you, touch you or just mess with you.

But don't let this fool you, Nikolai is quite the manipulator. Nikolai tends to guilt trip you a lot, and likes to mock you and degrade you for his personal amusement while he hugs you.

A question you ask yourself a lot is if he actually loves you. It's not on a "He treats me like shit," kind of way, it'd more like, "He treats like I'm a pet/doll."

Nikolai often dresses you up in little outfits and has you help out with his tricks, even if they're super easy. Nikolai confuses you a lot. He claims that he hates human emotions and will kill you eventually, but his actions often contradict himself.

Also, out of all the yanderes, his punishments are the most cruel. His often energetic personality becomes a lot more sinister when he's upset. His smile wouldn't have any joy, it would sadistic and filled with anger, and the look in his eyes send a chill down your spine. When it comes to actual punishments, I can see Nikolai being on the more physical and emotional side of things. His punishments are often a mixture of emotional and physical pain. He'd always start his punishments off as a game, giving you two options on which game the two of you will be playing. This really fucks with your brain because he'll purposely make the game you choose harder and more painful. Games often very, but all of them end with you hiding in a dark corner, hugging your knees as you cry. Nikolai would only laugh at your expense and tell you that you're no fun. But keep in mind, his energy and joy during punishments is all an act, if you tic him off during these punishments, even a little bit, the facade will drop.

If it wasn't clear enough, Nikolai is definitely on the more playful and teasing side of things as a yandere, rarely taking things seriously and constantly being a pain in your side. It takes a lot to make him mad, he's attempting to lose all emotions afterall, but if you do, he just becomes a husk of a person, a truly terrifying sight.

King of stalking. He can literally disguise himself as anyone, and he uses this skill to his advantage. He often pretends to be the worker at places you often go to. That one Cafe across the street, oh yeah, he was hired there last week.

However, despite his strong desire to kill you, his biggest fear is losing you. You make him feel something, you make feel love, you make him weak. You keep him bound to the chains of emotions and make him never reach true freedom, so he wants to kill you, to be freed of you. But, the way you smile, the way you cry when he hurts you, the you walk, the way you yell at him when you grow sick of his mind games and quizzes, he grows more and more obsessed. He can't let you go. He just can't.

Fyodor influences his actions like crazy ngl. He loves talking about you, especially to Fyodor, and one day Fyodor told him that if he truly wanted you to love him, even if he does cruel things to you, he'd have to break you down into nothing, make you dependent on him for everything, and then build you back up in his image. However, Nikolai wants a doll that still has a lot of life in them, making you cry and scream would be much more enjoyable when it's sincere. But, a sweet, quiet, obedient doll, he wouldn't mind that either. With Nikolai, I feel like your actions will dictate how he'll want you.

Nikolai is very hard yandere to understand, and if his darling even wants to try and use Manipulation to get their way, you got another thing coming. Nikolai is far from dumb, and is also extremely aware, so sure, he'll play into the idea that you're gaining control over him day by day, but in reality, it's the other way around.

So in conclusion, Nikolai is definitely one of the more scary yanderes. He's extremely deceiving, but if I had to compare him to Fyodor, Dazai, or even worse, Jouno, than he's a fucking angel.

Sigma (Yandere Idea)

Sigma would be the sweetest fucking yandere, dear lord.

Sigma is probably the only yandere in BSD that wouldn't be abusive in nature. Maybe a little bit manipulative, but that's damn near about it.

I can see Sigma being a very protective darling, wanting to keep you away from any harm, emotional and physical.

He would do everything in his power to keep you a secret. He's already in a very dangerous position as a member of the DOA, but if Nikolai, or even worse Fyodor, finds out about your existence, he can't help but imagine what they'll do to you.

I'd say the relationship Sigma would have with his darling would be pretty normal for the most part. Whenever he comes home after a long day at the casino, he always makes sure to get you a gift, may it be flowers or a piece of jewelry.

Sigma would be very awkward with his love. He's barely lived life, let alone been in a relationship. The feelings he has for you are very foreign and often causes him stress, but whenever you do something romantic for him, he often goes blank.

Now, would Sigma kidnap you? Ehhhh, maybe, it depends. Sigma doesn't want to hurt you in anyway, and if you're not very keen on the idea of being kidnapped, he'll have to find another way to get to you.

When it comes to the topic of punishments, Sigma hates them. Sigma is extremely patient, so making him so upset to the point he'll punish you is a fucking talent. But, his punishments would be very light. He'll lock you in your room as a punishment, but the moment you start crying and begging to be let out, he caves. He has a massive soft spot for you and just wants your love and affection.

One downside of being with Sigma is your freedom. Sigma is very concerned about your safety, so in the beginning he would keep you hidden while he tended at the casino. However, as time went on, his paranoia began to grow. What if someone finds you and you get hurt? What if you get kidnapped? What if you left him? Thoughts like that would race in his head while at the casino, causing him to not be at the top of his game. So, he decided to keep you at the casino with him, keeping in his office while be worked. Keeping you secret from the DOA became significantly harder, but at least you're not alone.

You would definitely get stockholm syndrome with Sigma, if not just fall in love with him normally. Sigma is such a sweetheart, probably the best boyfriend in BSD. He is very awkward in the beginning due to him being unfamiliar with romance, but once he gets more comfortable, he becomes the perfect boyfriend.

[bloodyknucklesforme]

Pomegranate | Nikolai x F!Reader

Bonus content!

This is just a scene that I couldn't fit into the previous chapters but I wanted to treat you guys for being so enthusiastic over the last update 💕

cw: cw: dark fic, dubcon/noncon, reader is being trafficked, human trafficking,

Masterpost

There was a pale pink box sitting on the bed when you got out of the shower. Nikolai always found a way to make your jaw drop. It was a gorgeous lingerie set. Black silk with sheer tulle and blue-pink beaded embroidered flowers. Bra, panties and garter with matching stockings. He left the price tag on. You didn't even know a bra could cost almost a thousand pounds.

He was waiting for you in the living room, lounging on the couch, cigar in hand.

"You dance at the club, no?"

"Sometimes." It wasn't your strongest talent. You could shake ass when needed but you weren't a big moneymaker on stage like other girls.

"Want you to dance for me." He fiddled with the remote, dimming the lights and turning on music. "Come here."

You stood between his knees, trying to sway to the beat the best you could. He had a small smile as you turned to sway your hips and ass in his face. He looked more amused than turned on.

"I'm sorry." You stopped. You shifted between your feet. "I don't really do this part."

"You are not good, that is true." He stuck a finger under the bottom elastic of your bra. "Still pretty."

He snapped the elastic, "On your knees, over the coffee table."

Nik kept you between his legs on the couch, panties wet with his spend dripping out of you. You traced his tattoos. You wanted to ask about them. You'd heard a lot of Russian tattoos had deeper meanings.

"Kolya?"

"hmm?"

"What does this say?" you asked, underlining the Cyrillic letters on his chest. He huffed. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-"

"It's my mother's name. She killed herself when I was young."

"I'm sorry." You kissed his left pec. It was easy to forget that you both existed outside of this building. That you each had lives before this. You could guess all the horrible things he'd done to get to where he was, you never thought about all the horrible things that could have happened to him.

His face didn't betray any emotion as usual. He had two stripes of white in his beard, just faint lines. How old he was, you supposed you'd never know. Old enough to be born in a country that no longer existed, watch the wall crumble and all the chaos that followed. You dragged your fingers across the lines.

He chuckled and caught your hand, pulling your fingers into his mouth to nip at them.

"Don't remind me I'm old." His teeth skated across your knuckles.

"I don't think you're that old." He raised an eyebrow at you. "Most old men don't leave bruises on my hips like you."

He laughed, tugging you flush against him.

"Keep talking like that and I'll never send you back." A flutter of hope. Nik was a deeply awful man and you'd come to understand that what he did to Marcus was a show of restraint. He was the snake in the garden, Hades in the underworld, a fae - dangling fruit in your face hoping you'll take the bait.

He'd never let you go if you did.

This is pretty unedited but I felt like I owed you guys once again.

[literatureloverx]

Just use this blog! I would love to get your thoughts in Chuuya since you do such an amazing job with Fyodor. Would be awesome to know your ideal types for the other bsd guys (..well chuuya mainly)

Such a cutie patootie request 🥹 I love it, and I’ve been wanting to write about this for a while now!

I’m a bit nervous about writing a character who isn’t Fyodor, but I really hope I can meet your expectations. ❤️ I would hate to disappoint. 🥺

Just a heads-up: I’m also planning to write about Dazai’s, Nikolai’s, and maybe even Akutagawa’s ideal types at some point. ❤️

Chuuya x fem!reader, Chuuya x ideal type!reader.🧡

Chuuya’s ideal type

In my character analysis post for Fyodor, I mentioned that Fyodor is not a "darling-neutral" character, which suggests that he has a very clear and non-negotiable ideal type.

However, this is certainly not the case with our beloved Chuuya.

Chuuya is genuinely "darling-neutral," but I’d like to depict an ideal type nonetheless, as I believe he has some aspects he would greatly admire in a woman.

Although I can’t recall where I read it, it was mentioned somewhere that Chuuya appreciates elegant people with a good sense of fashion.

When I think of such a person, I immediately picture an elegant woman who knows how to carry herself effectively and gracefully.

A good sense of fashion often indicates high self-esteem and self-worth.

This leads me to believe that Chuuya’s ideal type would definitely be someone confident.

It’s important to clarify that confidence doesn’t mean being loud or mean.

Imagine someone who is elegant, feminine (but not hyper-feminine), and confident.

This person would not be gracefully meek or silent but would act, look, behave, and move with class and confidence.

Given Chuuya’s own pride in his male strength, his keen sense of fashion, and his confidence brimming with pride, I believe he would fall for such a person almost immediately.

However, his ideal partner should not challenge him in a way that disrupts his sense of harmony.

This is precisely why he says he hates Dazai; it’s not that he hates Dazai himself, but rather the constant challenges Dazai presents that unsettle him.

Chuuya is a proud man in every possible way, and he wouldn’t easily tolerate disrespect or undue challenge.

In terms of physical appearance, I don’t think that attributes like hair or skin color, height (even though he is 5'3"/160 cm), or weight would be of significant importance to him.

However, I don’t believe he would be attracted to someone who is obese. Don’t get me wrong—he is strong enough to carry someone regardless of their weight, but it’s simply not his vibe.

“If a person’s body is prominent, it should be due to athleticism.”—Chuuya, probably.

Still, I don’t see him caring much about your fitness level either.

When I said he is "darling-neutral," I genuinely meant it.

I believe that Chuuya could easily fall in love with a shy, more masculine, sincere, or careful partner.

He has a beautiful and deeply humane heart, which allows him to see the best in his partner, no matter their characteristics.

However, this is not in a naive way—he would guide his partner to the right path if he sensed something might be off.

On the emotional side, Chuuya loves challenges, but his life is already filled with them. He might seek rest in his partner’s arms rather than being constantly challenged.

He would likely get bored with someone who is only loving but not truly engaging, as he is not a passive person himself.

Chuuya is active in whatever he does.

Chuuya is active in everything he does, so he needs a partner who can at least keep up with his lifestyle.

As a feared man and a valuable part of the Port Mafia—an executive, no less—his position should not intimidate his partner.

This is why I believe he wouldn’t keep his situation a secret.

He wants a true partner, someone loyal to him who also has a life of her own with meaningful activities, so she doesn’t feel alone or isolated when he’s not around.

His ideal partner should be independent and capable of taking care of herself, but also willing to let him take care of her—not because she needs it, but because she wants it.

This is how Chuuya expresses his love, through grand gestures and physical affection.

His partner should accept this wholeheartedly.

Loyalty is one of the most important aspects of Chuuya's relationship with his partner. He is loyal until the end of time, and he expects the same in return.

Then there’s his expensive wine collection—he’s not a heavy drinker, but he enjoys a good glass of wine now and then, especially when celebrating or unwinding after a long day.

He would expect his partner to share these peaceful moments with him. His vulnerable state when he drinks and relaxes gives him a sense of domestic warmth.

I’m not sure if this is a common interpretation of Chuuya’s character, but I see him as a somewhat possessive lover—perhaps not possessive in the typical sense, but definitely territorial.

Sexually, he may be very possessive, but in other aspects, he’s more about asserting his territory.

Because he won’t take it lightly if someone flirts with you or eyes you, you’ll need to be someone who can maintain a certain distance from others when necessary.

This is why I envisioned an ideal type for Chuuya who is classy, carrying herself with elegance and confidence, rather than someone who is chatty or bubbly.

Chuuya is territorial, and while you’re free to do as you please—go shopping with friends (he would even give you his black card), meet them anywhere, or engage in any activities you like—he barely has time for himself.

So, when he does have time for the two of you, he would expect you to set everything else aside to spend that time together.

That is why he needs someone who is ready to make sacrifices when needed.

Edit: I practically forgot to mention any real sexual content about his potential darling, so here they are:

I don’t think he would care whether his partner is a virgin or not, but if you are, he’d be very proud to be your first and would strive to make your first experience as beautiful and sensually unforgettable as possible.

However, I can’t see him being attracted to someone who is "too open" with sexual encounters, like someone who sleeps around.

This simply doesn’t align with the image of a woman who carries herself with confidence and grace.

[osamucide]

Hi! I love your writing sm!!🥰 can I request a jealous Nikolai or Fyodor (nsfw pls) it doesn’t matter either one 🙏

jealous – nikolai gogol + fyodor dostoevsky . . . .ᐟ

NSFW CONTENT - MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

wc: 1.5k

cw: explicit sexual content, gn!reader, language, dirty talk, brief mentions of ownership/belonging, toxic ass men. nikolai: mentions of injury/threats/murder, edging mention, oral (m!receiving), rough facefucking, wrist restraints, cum eating, nicknames (dovey, angel, sweetheart; kolya for him); fyodor: teasing, mild degradation, mild spanking, one religious reference, fingering, penetration, i love yous, nicknames (pretty, my love, whore, милашка/milashka=cutie; fedya, my only/everything for him)

reid: hey anon, thank you so much for the kind words uwu why not both?? inspo for this struck me as hcs/scenario format, hope that's okay <3 this is my first time ever writing for nikolai! he's so insane and he was actually a lot of fun to take a shot at. enjoy!

. . . .ᐟ

i can see NIKOLAI being easily made jealous.

even if you don't mean to provoke it, he's got a screw or two loose enough that his paranoia will get the better of him

and in true nikolai nature, he'll do some unhinged shit in the name of protecting his relationship with you.

he definitely maimed, shot, and mutilated a couple innocent flirters before you could really sit down with him and express how much you...disliked that methodology.

he does not play about you.

he gets better about it further into your relationship - no more murder on your behalf, you tell him, and he can manage that much! with this man, however, the unfortunate soul who fucketh around shall still findeth out.

oh, how he enjoys the look on the handsy stranger's face when he slinks up behind you to curl around your waist and portal-hold the tip of a blade to their chin

likes your reaction even more!

the way you squeeze his arm when you realize it's just your beloved jester behind you -

the blush on your face as you explain to the scum that this is your dear boyfriend (and apologize for the knife pointed at their face) -

the smooch you whip around to press to nikolai's cheek while he withdraws the weapon but never breaks eye contact with the stranger as they back away -

it all works like a charm!

what he loves most, though, comes later...

He's been edging himself with your mouth for god knows how long.

"If other bitches get to hear you talk, it's gonna be with that pretty voice wrecked," Nikolai groans, out of breath. "Feels- ngh, s'fuckin' good."

You can barely take it anymore. The blood's rushing to your head, first of all - it's been hanging off the edge of the bed practically since the minute you got home. Your jaw aches as Nikolai continues to use your throat. Most frustrating, though, is the pulsing heat between your legs that you can't even sate because your lover has bound your wrists up near your chest - all you can do is arch when, off and on, Nikolai reaches down to play with you while he fucks your mouth.

But he's getting needy, you can tell, because he loses himself a bit - he hasn't touched you in a good few minutes and his thrusts are getting greedier. He's long quit letting you come up for air. You think you've run out of tears - all you can do is breathe furiosly through your nose as he holds each side of your head and grunts from his chest as he ruins you.

You claw at him. "So good, dovey," he tells you, "almost done. Keep bein' good f'me- yeah."

You move your tongue how you can, hum around him when you can - eventually your dedication is rewarded when he pulls all the way out and strokes himself frantically over your tongue - and you cough a little, curling up into yourself.

You can hardly help your open-mouthed smile, however, when Nikolai releases the rough grip on your jaw to caress your cheek as he cums in thick spurts across your face. Your lashes flutter, he's moaning - "fuck, angel- angh!" - and you let out the garbled beginnings of a giggle as you lap up what makes it in your mouth.

You feel him scoop his load off your skin before his finger's in your mouth. Immediatley after you suck the rest of him down, he's bending down to kiss you sloppily and uncuff your wrists.

"That's my dovey," he affirms (more to himself than you). He peppers your face with kisses, his messy, snowy bangs brushing your face. "C'mere."

He works you upright just to lay you back down, more comfortably this time, finally and with fervor circling his fingers around your clenching hole.

"Kolya-" you rasp, sore.

"Took me so good, sweetheart," Nikolai shushes you, eyes alight with mania as he starts trailing kisses from your neck to your stomach. "Now that you remember who owns you, 'm gonna show you none of those motherfuckers could make you feel as good as I can."

. . . .ᐟ

oh, demon FYODOR.

i think he's less jealous than he is simply possessive.

he's not super concerned about people flirting with you, doing things for you, checking you out...in fact, he kind of likes watching those things happen! not that he doesn't expect it, you're perfect after all <3

because he knows, as you settle in his arms to whisper about the compliment you received or giggle at the person who offered to pay for your coffee, none of it will ever compare to the sweet words and pure love he showers you with, and he relishes in that fact. they can try anything they want, but you will never belong to anyone but him.

doesn't go needlessly far with expressing his jealousy when it does crop up - he's a tactful man, and he's not going to act out in a way that might put you off like nikolai will

he's patient, too. he's so composed around others. no one expects it - anyone who doesn't know better would assume the idiot who makes a pass at the demon king's beloved would get the whole room aired out in a matter of seconds

on the contrary, fyodor will sit with the closest he can get to a humorous grin on his face while he waits for you to make your way over and kiss him or sit on his lap or hook your arms around his waist

he'll tease you a little about it. "getting some attention?"

if you smile at him reassuringly, lean in, and tell him, "none that truly concerns me," all will be peaceful.

if you tease him back, however - maybe cross your legs away from him and shoot him a smirk and a quick "maybe so" - oh yeah, you're in for it.

He works you up, makes you a mess - then he throws it in your face.

"My gosh, милашка-" He doesn't take the Lord's name in vain even while he's drawing downright sinful noises from your body. "-listen to yourself. Shameless."

Fyodor's a patient man, as mentioned before; he uses it to his advantage in situations like this. He's stretching you out on his lithe fingers, slowly, almost painfully - his other hand traverses your thigh, landing a hard spank to the side of your ass each time you roll your hips unwillingly. You really can't help it either way - you have to watch and feel his pretty, pale fingers disappear into your hole, so it's either squirm and get smacked or whine and get mocked.

You're in a lose-lose situation, it seems. It felt amazing at first, the slow curl of his knuckles inside you, the gentle circling of his wrist, the concentrated sighs that left his rosy lips as he watched you relax into his touch, but now it's just torture. Now, you can only clench furiously and cry out please, please, just a little faster, Fedya, please!

Your eyes water when he finally gives in a little, moving fractionally faster.

"Do you deserve it, my love?" He cocks his head, looking at you as if he really values your opinion on the matter. "Or, my whore - since you're comfortable entertaining the advances of strangers."

You weren't, you must've sworn up and down ten times by now. You were being polite, you promise, but he shakes his head, his soft black locks waving as if mocking you too.

"Polite? You're lucky I haven't forced that filthy mouth shut. That's what got you here, after all," Fyodor explains excruciatingly. Sure, you got a little sassy with him after he accused you of being just that, a whore, after you'd flashed a humble smile toward the fellow restaurant patron who'd sent you a drink. And sure, that was tone deaf of them, considering Fyodor was very clearly holding your hand across the table and sporting your love bites on his neck, but you just couldn't be rude.

His eyes soften when a fat tear rolls down your cheek.

"Oh, pretty, don't cry." He shifts his legs beneath himself; his pace stays the same, but he reaches deeper inside you. "You remember who you're talking to, yes? You learn your lesson?"

You nod frantically. You whimper. "Of course, of course, Fedya, my only, ‘m sorry..."

You yelp like you've been burnt when he pulls his fingers out of you, but soon enough his hand is gripping your waist, his tip is teasing your entrance, and he's cooing into your ear, "Your only. You only love me, right? Say it."

You cup his face, grab at his shoulders, grind into him as you tearily reply, "Only love you, Fedya. I love you. You're my everything, please. My everything. I love you."

He knows you do. He just has to make you say it - make sure you know you do.

Fyodor's tongue finds yours as he thrusts into you - you're his everything, too, and he won't admit that, but he'll fuck you so good you know it's true.

"Relax, my love. Let me make you cum."

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

I’m just going to throw down my thoughts now real quick. Someone is obviously going to get taken over by Fyodor. This takeover seems to require blood to activate. Here are the potential options, rated lowest to highest by my own personal interest.

Random character we’ve never met - the easy and boring answer. Fyodor will body snatch one of the vampire guards he was communicating with. Fair amount of likelihood since he could easily have made the transfer of blood at any point, though I’m not sure yet if it needs to be an instantaneous thing or if his blood can lie dormant. Either way I think it’s a bit of an ass-pull with no stakes on our cast so I’m hoping this isn’t the case.

A named character outside Meursault - Probably someone he’s had a lot of contact with, so Fukuchi. This depends on the blood having a latency period and is also insanely contrived. I actually hate it more than the random guard.

The Catgirl thief - I’m assuming this is extremely unlikely since the host needs to be alive. But anyways. Women lovers here’s how we lose even worse.

Having said this now, I think it’s fairly obvious it has to be one of the other Meursault four. This is appropriately thematic and tragic, given that all of them place a lot of value on free will and self-determination, which a takeover by Fyodor would rob them of.

Chuuya - He spent a lot of time around Chuuya to be sure but there’s no blood on him. If there’s a latency period though, it is possible. I’m not feeling this one though, to be honest. I don’t see what narrative purpose it serves - Chuuya hasn’t had enough of a role in the manga for this to mean much, other than royally pissing Dazai off (which to be fair is definitely in character for Fyodor). I think it far more likely that Chuuya is going to be a witness for whatever comes next.

Sigma - High likelihood. He did get stabbed and had the memory transfer. I can’t remember whether Fyodor touched him with his wounded hand. It would be brutal for this to happen to him after he’d just broken free from his manipulation. But honestly I don’t know that Sigma getting taken over is all that interesting. For one, they’re going to need his knowledge (though that may be a reason for Fyodor to off him truthfully), and for another, I just don’t think Sigma’s… done enough as a character. I feel it would kind of render his arc in Meursault pointless to end his story here.

Nikolai - The most likely possibility to me. He is holding Fyodor’s severed hand, which he touched to his face. Fyodor’s ability probably kickstarts after his death, and Nikolai was the first to get his blood on him. Sadly, I suspect that if this is the case, this will be the end for Nikolai. If he gets taken over, I can’t see a reason or method to restore him to himself. What a horribly tragic end this would be to our favourite clown, his freedom snatched away for good by the one person he couldn’t help but get attached to.

Dazai - I dismissed this off-hand at first. Of course I did, Dazai is immune to abilities. I also want to be clear that I seriously doubt Asagiri will off his favourite boy like this. But oh man. What if Fyodor’s ability isn’t an ability, much like in the first skk manga team up? What if them both being there is a call-back to Rimbaud who snatched corpses, and Lovecraft who could hurt Dazai? What if Fyodor really has become no longer human - and this is the proof? I was kind of hoping the Meursault arc would end with Dazai (temporarily!) out of the picture, and this would be a way to do it - Atsushi and Akutagawa would have to step up, Chuuya could be more relevant. We could even have more Kyouka if what I’m starting to wonder is true - that Fyodor was involved in the death of her parents. At the same time, Dazai’s special boy plot armour nullification and mysteriousness gives us a plausible reason to bring him back. And all the while maybe they could continue their mind games, with Dazai being an annoying little pest in the back of Fyodor’s mind.

[kaorikarma]

( soft)YAN!BSD MEN HEADCANNONS

How they show their love + Act in their relationship

Nikolai Gogol, Sigma, Chuuya Nakahara, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Dazai Osamu, Bram Stoker, Mushitaro, Jouno x reader

Warnings: Yandere, manipulative (fucking fedya & Kolya 💀), suggestive (chuu toy and Daz),straight up nsfw (Chuuie), PAINFUL AWKWARDNESS (bram)

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Nikolai Gogol

Nikolai... is interesting. His love isn't apparent most of the time. Just like he masks his true demeanor with humor and his eccentric attitude, he masks his love as well.

Even when you begin dating, don't expect him to open up much. Everything stays the same as when you were friends, with the exception of an occasional teasing kiss.

Emphasis on teasing. Part of Nikolai's expert plan (in his mind) is to free you from emotions too, by breaking you down. That occasional kiss is rare- withheld for only when you please him or to give you a rare spot of hope when you begin feeling hopeless about the relationship.

He does love you, but it's begrudgingly; a great source of irritation for him; after all these years of fighting against his "human nature" he is still privy to human weaknesses.

When he does genuinely express his love, it's when he's being serious with you, trusting you with the man under the mask. It may not seem like the best relationship, and certainly not love-- but if you peer between the lines.. you might set your eyes on the shadows of affections.

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Sigma

Sigma is so, so, suffocatingly cautious.

Can you blame him? Everyone either uses him or leaves him. Sigma's expression of love could be just so much deeper-- but he's learned his lesson, he's already half-broken and you're the only one gluing together the edges of deep-running cracks, but leaving the center to shatter.

When you first start dating him, he still doesn't even leave the casino. Doesn't even bother, since it would be better to stay in case something happened, after all what if the power failed, or somebody crucial called out sick, or--

You spend a lot of time breaking him from his anxious thoughts.

He eventually begins opening up to you, laughing with you, letting you listen to his opinions and thoughts with minimal cares. He loves your kisses and dreams of things with you he never once considered in his short life. And about his short life--

He still hasnt told you of his origins.. it's not that he doesn't want to, but he doesn't know how.

He worries sometimes about your relationship, which seems to be going just so well. Will you hate him? You'd leave him, surely!

Worry is the center focus of Sigma's love, and his life in general. Don't expect him to ever stop worrying about one thing or another, from a date night to marriage, his sense of anxiety seems engraved in his bones.

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Chuuya Nakahara

Chuuya's love is so aggressive, in more ways than one.

Chuuya's loss of everyone he loved makes him utterly convinced he's going to lose you. You matter more than anything to him, and it is that loyalty that strains your relationship; particularly, your disdain for his membership of the mafia. He struggles with himself, day and night, not being able to choose between you and the mafia. It's like asking him to choose between his family and his lover.

The fights aren't enough to deter you from pestering him about it anyway; he doesn't let you see how badly the topic upsets him. Mentally, he's begging you to drop it. There's always a little bit of tension. Chuuya's short fuse coupled with the (albeit small) problems you have, makes an sometimes explosive bond between the two of you.

Try as he might, he just can't excuse some of the stupid things you do when he's not constantly watching your every move like a toddler. Maybe none of the mistakes you make are big, but Chuuya is annoyed by every little thing, so there's no such thing as a "small" problem.

When the goings' good, however, it's good. Chuuya spoils you with lots of affections, drowning you in his deep - sometimes frankly obsessive- love. Chuuya will come home with flowers, and gifts or whatever details you had that needed tying up if you haven't gotten to them yet. His heart is so big and open when it comes to you, he can't even really hide it. He just loves you so, so much.

(NSFW) Chuuya's sweet, happy love, however, has to be balanced out by the roughness he displays in bed. If you aren't interested in sex for a long time or for whatever personal reason, you might as well call it quits. Chuuya's sex drive is insanely high, and he's absolutely, torturously, wild in bed. He needs you; sex goes beyond simple want for him.

All in all, Chuuya's expression of love runs as deep as his loyalty, so you'd better not betray it.

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Fyodor Dostoevsky

Fyodor is a very manipulative man, and even more so a lover.

If you have something he wants, he bleeds you dry of it- and that could be love or information. It's all the same protocol. Deceive and achieve.

Fyodor's "love" consists of the sweetest phrases and whispers of passion at the beginning, and eventually you find yourself at his beck and call, more of a slave than a lover, a partner, what you long to be with him.

He teases you, brings you to the edge of how much he 'hates' you, and then pulls back the reigns, showering you with love and apologies and the promise of change. Fyodor's real love is rough and cold. You're in a better situation with the fake affections than the real ones.

Give yourself to him. All of you. Let him love you.

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Dazai Osamu

Dazai is all smiles, jokes, passion and cruelty.

It doesn't seem like it, but under the surface Dazai's demeanor is cold, calculating, and cruel. Frightening to you, in a relationship, even though he never physically harms you. But the threats... are enough to keep you in check. Luckily, most of the time Dazai keeps up that happy facade, even with you.

Your relationship becomes strained when he lets that facade down too much, but the truth is so well-hidden most of the time that for the most part you consider your relationship happy and fruitful.

Dazai's affection is plentiful, with many gentle kisses and passionate nights . You often have open conversations, attempting to decode and outwit his high intelligence, which, for the most part, was to no avail. He was just too smart, and always on top of you, more quick witted than you ever could be. He would deflect your more probing questions and problems with a joke, and turn the situation back on you.

Dazai, on the whole would be a great lover, but an even greater enemy.

Should I make a Dark Yandere Headcacnnon post for Daz? Because I feel like this man would hold his own suicide over your head right off the bat, so you would never know he was suicidal to begin with. He gets a 10/10 in the manipulation catagory.

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Bram Stoker

Bram's affection is apathetic.

It isn't his fault, really. It's hard to love on someone when you're only a head and shoulders mounted on a sharp blade, but even when he has an opportunity, Bram feels more jaded about love and getting close to someone than anyone else, and it's hard to get him to open up.

Given your relationship is really just watching movies and talking, you don't get to be as close to Bram as you would like either, but in rare moments he will allow you to carry him, not like fukuchi, but resting his head in the crook of your neck like a hug. He won't admit it, but he adores being held like this. If he had arms, he'd hold you crushingly tight.

Many conversations with Bram are awkward, both because of his conflicted emotions and his lack of modern knowledge. Prepare for some downright painful misunderstandings and embarrassing explanations.

Bram doesn't know how to express his deep love for you, especially in a modern world he has trouble adapting to. He thinks, if he had a body, he would have already taken the opportunity to take you far away from everyone, from evil people he knows more about than you. Lying beneath his polite disdain for many things, he's worried-- fearful of what will be done to you to manipulate him, and he won't be able to protect you.

Bram knows he can't protect you, but he'll be damned if he doesn't try.

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Mushitaro Oguri

Mushitaro's affections are meticulous, almost as meticulous a him. He wants your kisses and affections, don't get me wrong; but not in public, limited in private, and only in certain places, like the couch or the bedroom. He even goes as far as to request that you not kiss or touch him in certain areas, for no other reason than him finding it improper (although you really think he's just being bashful).

His personality, as a whole, makes him very hard to be in any sort of partnership with. He's picky about everything, from the food you make him to the things even you wear.

In a relationship, he's loving, stipulations aside. His love is more protective than you think is normal, at first, but you quickly sink into your normal routine of going everywhere with Mushitaro and only Mushitaro. He doesn't care for your friends but lets you hang out with them on occasion, a long as you are with him and he finds them decent company. After all, your image reflects his as well. You wouldn't want to ruin his image, now would you?

Mushi isn't a hardcore yandere, much to your luck. Eventually, there comes a time where his nature is finally apparent to you, but there's not much you can do about it and not much you would do anyways. You already know, it's simply not a concern that he may go too far; the strength to truly harm you isn't within his reach.

The best thing you can do in a relationship with Mushitaro is to please him as best as possible, love him with all your heart, and settle into your strictly-regulated relationship.

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Jouno Saigiku

Jouno's relationship with you is forceful. He tries to make it feel natural, with fake affections and gifts, but doesn't know how to properly conduct a meaningful relationship; after all, your first "date" was when he showed up to a Café you regularly frequented after you had previously turned him down numerous times, infinitely agitating him.

He often spoke of his association with the hunting dogs, hoping to impress you, although you'd never been overly interested in his stories. It wasn't that you didn't love him at all; you wouldn't have agreed (after much pressure) to live with him if you didn't, but his expression of love feels strained and you pick up on it.

With the lack of affections, you can sometimes become upset, and moreover unbalanced by the rejection of your outright asks for his affection. However, if Jouno senses that he's really, legitimately fucked up, he will probably give you a nice cuddle, and perhaps, if you voice that it's an issue that plagues you, he will kiss you on the cheek on the way out the door each day.

The issue at hand is that Jouno does really love you, but he doesn't know how to balance love, work, and his own sadistic nature. He does care for you a lot, and will show it, but it may be in manipulative ways, sometimes with poorly disguised threats or pressure. It's not that he can't be more kind and caring with you, but part of him won't allow it, so he follows his own warped personality.

Loving Jouno isn't easy, but the sweet moments have unimaginable value, and Jouno will always care for and protect you, in his own cute little ways. Love him, or face the consequences.

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Wow! Hi, thanks for making it to the end. This is the first time I've written in what feels like forever due to health issues but I am so glad to be back and feeding the fires of fandoms again. Requests are open! Love yall!!

-April 11th-14th, 2023-

-Kaori-

[what-the-stories-have-foretold]

The True Queen´s Jester

Nikolai Gogol x fem!reader

Navi.

Warnings: blasphemy?, royal au? Queen!reader

Autumn Festival 2024

Wordcount: 500+

He stepped through the marble hallways, the constant jingle accompanying him as always grounding him. It was surprisingly warm, still, he wore his usual attire. The knights passing him regarded him with disgust, or pity, yet how could he care? After all, only he was favoured by you. So, the jester walked on, you on his mind when apart, eyes solely on you when in front of you. His devotion never wavered.

The great, heavy wooden doors were opened for him. He was unsure why you needed so many to attend you. Would he alone not be enough?

Finally, you were revealed to him for the first time on this day, and the soft orange rays of the rising sun crowned your lovely head.

“My Queen, you look as enchanting as ever. So radiant, all the stars must fight even just for a place behind you.” He bowed to you, deep.

“Kolya.” A shudder went through him at the soft call of his name. “Come here, have you slept well? Tell me, did you dream?” His heart soared as he followed your command, taking your outstretched hand when he reached you and knelt to kiss it. Then, he looked up at you. The kindness in your bright eyes never ceased to amaze him. He had served many a queen, but none as wondrous as you.

“I have slept well, my Queen.” His thumb gently brushed over the back of the hand he was still holding. Your hand, he marvelled, was so soft, he wondered if you had ever truly worked. “And dreamed, well, I believe it was an Enchantress I had followed through the woods. So stunning, I believed her to be you, and she promised to bring my lost soul back home.” He dramatically touched his chest.

His eyes glimmered at your chuckle.

“And? Did she bring you back to me?”

Nikolai hummed and bowed his head.

“Are you certain she was not you, my Queen?”

“Ah, now that you say that,” you pretended.

Your jester looked up again, his eyes soft as he regarded you.

“It couldn´t have been anyone else. Only you know the place, Keeper of my Soul.” He fully ignored the glares of servants and knights sent in his direction. All he wished for in that moment – and always – for you to look at him as you did now. Full of curiosity and wonder. “Anyhow, I was lead then by the Enchantress,” he continued with a hushed voice, and you leaned forward as if conspiring with him, “to an abode filled with golden everlasting and red dahlias and fluffy pillows forming a fort. There were even little stars to illuminate her home.”

“That sounds like heaven,” you sighed and the brush of your breath on his already flushed skin made him light-headed. Nikolai grinned at you.

“See, you must be the Enchantress.”

You shook your head, giggling. “I don´t have an abode like that.”

“Then you shall have one!” He jumped and pulled you up with him. The shriek you let out alerted several retainers, though you both ignored them. Laughing, you let him tug you out of the throne room.

“Where are we going?”

“To build you heaven, my Queen. All shall be yours, after all. No god to rule over the realms, only my Queen crowned with golden flowers with her humblest servant by her side.”

[creantzy]

The Path To Freedom [PART 7]

Read from left to right

Fyodor said that the priest is foolish because he recognized that behind his brainwashing ability there are no skills. The priest knows little of human psychology and doesn’t have good manipulation skills for example because he always had it the “easy way” with his ability, he never had to learn it. This way Fyodor knew he was easy to fool. Nikolai had kept his own ability a secret from the priest, so their goal was to catch the priest off guard but also not scaring him enough to be panicked and using his brainwashing ability as a defense. When he was suddenly in a different room, his confusion was supposed to be bigger than his fear, so that when he asked Nikolai what had happened he wouldn’t use his ability on him since he wanted the true answer to his question.