#ngl this looks sick as hell on my wall if i do say so myself

[ravinoforre]

Happy 19th Anniversary Pokémon XD, my favourite game ever!

To commemorate the occasion, I've spent the last week and a half hand painting the game's cover! It was a lot of work, but I'm really happy with how it turned out!

ˢᵒ ᵘʰ...ˡᶦᵏᵉˢ ᵃⁿᵈ ʳᵉᵇˡᵒᵍˢ/ʳᵉᵗʷᵉᵉᵗˢ ᵃᵖᵖʳᵉᶜᶦᵃᵗᵉᵈ ᶠᵒʳ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵒⁿᵉ 🥺👉👈

[lastoneout]

CW: Discussions of weight loss, fatphobia, eating disorders, and cancer.

I still cannot get over how when I dropped 30lbs in part because I had a massive IBS flare for like two months that was so bad I was going to get multiple tests to make sure I didn't have cancer and yet I could not and STILL can't even mention it to a doctor(or most people) without them congratulating me. Like there are a few things a doctor can say that piss me the fuck off but congratulating me for dropping 30lbs during a period of my life where I thought I might be DYING instantly makes me hate them. I'm STILL having to say "I got really sick and lost 30lbs" to make people shut the fuck up. I was getting skinny so fast it was scaring my family AND me but whatever I guess being skinny is SO great and I should be thankful I went through hell that permanently changed my body in a way that I genuinely don't like!

'Cuz that's the other thing, I don't like how I look now. I gained like ~8lbs when I was in bed with the blood clot and ngl I started actually liking the way my body looked again. I don't like how I look rn, my fiance does(he loves how I look 100% of the time and I appreciate that endlessly) but even he admits I looked happier and healthier when I weighed 160lbs and now I kinda just look like I'm exhausted. When I got up to 143lbs I was looking in the mirror like "oh, I almost look like myself again, I forgot what it felt like to be happy with my body" like I looked healthier!! But nah the weight is already falling off because 135lbs is my new baseline and there's nothing I can do about that. (Also I hated how I had to get new knee braces made because my old ones don't fit anymore and I had to buy new clothes because the ones I enjoyed don't fit anymore and augh the only thing that is making me like my body rn is dressing butch, if I didn't have that I'd be going insane.) And I still have to deal with people acting like this thing that has legit ruined years of body positivity work is a good thing. Because at least I'm skinnier.

Society is so sickeningly "skinny positive" it legit disgusts me. And like this isn't even a drop in the bucket compared to what fat people go through, and it's why I'm so fucking passionate about fat liberation, I've watched tons of people I love completely destroy themselves to look more like me and I have to sit here and not only feel awful because I love them and don't want them to have to go through this but also because I know even looking like me wont be enough. Doctors still tell me to lose weight because I'm like a couple of lbs outside of "healthy" on the BMI scale, which is insane I weigh less than 10lbs more than I did when I was SIXTEEN atm and I can't say anything because I know they won't listen if I explain that even just being this thin is making me hate myself and feel like shit.

Fatphobia is so fucking evil. It absolutely destroys people. I genuinely baffles me that most skinny people can't see it because it's being used against us too, just in an affirming way and to me that is genuinely repulsive. Every compliment on my weight loss makes me want to punch through a brick wall. Knowing my story is going to be used to bludgeon other people with my condition becuase I lost weight without doing anything so "everyone" should be able to makes me so angry I could cry. It actually makes me feel sick to be praised for this, to know I'm a "success" story, to be lumped in with people who hate the people I love for the way their bodies naturally are, who want my loved ones to destroy themselves, who think I'm better than them when I am absolutely not.

Fat liberation is what we need to work towards, not "skinny positivity" or whatever, this is a systemic issue just like sexism and racism and homophobia and ableism and it must be dismantled if we want to create a better world for us all.

[sleepysnk]

hey hey! i'm back with some stuff for Eren because tbh i really liked this scenario. this kind of makes me happy because i feel like this happens often, and ngl, i see Eren kind of like this? not exactly sure, but i hope you guys enjoy! 🖤

Ditched

Pairings: Eren Jaeger x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Slight angst, mentions of cheating, mentions of alcohol, fluff at the end

A sigh came from Eren's mouth as he leaned up against the wall at the party he was currently at.

He got invited to this party that Reiner was hosting, of course Eren wasn't going to say no to a party, and Reiner being his friend he couldn't necessarily deny it would be bad. Reiner always threw some bangers and knew how to get all kinds of people to come. It was no lie to say Reiner was like a damn celebrity.

Eren on the other hand, wasn't having the greatest time.

He was waiting for someone. More specifically, Mina Carolina.

Eren and Mina had been talking for a few weeks and the two were starting to get to a point where they could reach a serious relationship, and Eren figured he'd invite her to the party. He genuinely liked her, but recently she started acting way different towards Eren. She became more dry and only interested in what Eren had to... offer. His friends explained that maybe she was just going through something, but something in his gut told him that things weren't right.

Here he was now, waiting for about 30 minutes or so. She still hadn't replied, nor showed up. It slightly made Eren's heart feel heavy, he felt like he had his time wasted.

He looked down at his phone, going to her messages.

8:28 <-Eren: hey i'm here

8:35 <-Eren: did you get the address?

8:47 <-Eren: Mina? where are you?

8:51 <-Eren: are you even coming?

9:01 <-Eren: hello??

Read: 9:05 P.M.

Eren clicked his phone off, placing it in his pocket after realizing she most likely wasn't showing up. Another disappointment in a talking stage, he was certain Mina was a nice girl. She was introduced to him Sasha, she never said anything bad about Mina. For one, Sasha always talked Mina up to Eren, but he guessed she wasn't into it anymore.

"Hey Eren! Did she show up?" Connie yelled over the loud music. "We've got some sick jello shots!" he said, smiling excitedly at him.

Eren didn't even feel excitement anymore, he just felt upset. His whole mood just crashed and he wanted nothing but to go home and sleep, maybe a nap would do him some good, or maybe some McDonald's.

"I think I'm gonna head home!" Eren shouted back, looking at Connie.

Connie nodded. "Are you sure?! Did she ditch you or something?!" he asked, looking around to find the black-haired girl who was no where to be seen.

"I guess so!" he yelled, looking at the time on his phone.

Eren felt the fullness of his bladder from the alcohol he consumed. He needed to pee before he leaves or he'll explode.

"Hey where's the bathroom!?" Eren asked, shouting at Connie.

He rubbed the back of his head. "Upstairs! Third door on the left!" he yelled, turning to walk away. "Drive safe by the way!" he added, walking away.

Eren shoved his phone back in his pocket and made his way up the long stairs to find the bathroom, his ears having a slight ring from going further away from the loud music that blasted below him.

As he made his way up the steps, he passed different people drunkenly falling down the stairs, or couples who were eating each other's faces. Making him cringe as he passed by as he heard the soft kissing noises coming from them. Gross.

He passed the multiple doors, hearing soft moans from girls who decided that hooking up with college guys was a good idea, or he heard different people yelling at those who were taking shots or hanging around in those usual smoke circles with marijuana.

"Third door on the left.." Eren said to himself as he stopped in front of the bathroom door which was shut.

The light was on and someone was clearly using it, so he decided to just wait for whoever was in there to come out. Eren kept looking at his phone as he waited, a few people passing by him and heading into the bedrooms. He assumed they were going in there to do the usual.

After about 10 minutes of waiting, Eren was starting to get antsy. Why the hell was someone in the bathroom for this long? He thought the person could be sick or maybe two people decided to go and hookup in the bathroom.

He decided to just knock, approaching the door he used his finger to knock on the door.

"Yo! Open the door! I gotta pee," he said, leaning against it so whoever was in there could hear him.

No response.

He sighed, whoever was in there clearly heard him, because he heard shifting behind the door.

"Look, just open the damn door. A line is going to form soon," Eren said, knocking once again on the door.

No response once again.

Eren decided to just say fuck it and open the door. He hesitated a bit and put his hand on the knob, nobody was really around to see him. He looked around and turned the knob which was unlocked, pushing it open he was faced with a girl.

She was leaning against the sink, a red solo cup next to her. Eren took in her features noticing dark mascara smudged around her eyes, along with tears going down her face.

The girls head snapped towards him. "Oh my God! I'm so sorry... um, I was just in here. Were you trying to come in?" she asked, wiping the tears from her cheeks.

Eren stood there for a moment taking in her appearance. "No don't worry.. um my bad for slamming the door open. I just needed to pee," he replied, rubbing the back of his neck. "Why are you crying? If you don't mind me asking," he asked, looking at her puffy eyes.

She sniffed. "Um.. it's really stupid, especially telling a stranger. I'm sorry, also don't apologize for coming in. I didn't hear you, I'm gonna go now." she said, grabbing her items.

Eren felt guilt washing over him noticing how sad she looked, she had nobody around her. Usually when he found girls crying at parties they were surrounded by their friends, but she was alone. Something about it didn't sit right with Eren, and he wanted to know what was up with her.

"Wait!" Eren said, stopping the girl in her tracks.

She looked back with her brows furrowed. "Huh?" she said.

He looked away and then back at her. "Look I know I may not know you, but you seem really upset right now, and I know how it feels to be alone. If I can, I'd like to know why you're crying in a bathroom." he replied, crossing his arms.

The girl stopped and stood, looking down at the floor. "Um.. well, it's a lot and I feel like it'd just bother you really. I need to call an Uber anyway," she said, going onto her phone. "Thank you really but it'd just burden you," she added.

Eren leaned against the door frame. "You had a shitty night and so did I, least I can do is help you out. Of course no force," he said, shrugging.

She thought for a second. Maybe he was just trying to be nice? He didn't seem like a creep, considering he didn't seem dressed to impress anybody.

"Um sure I guess..." she replied, putting her phone away.

Eren was surprised at her answer. "I need to pee first if you don't mind," he said, smiling a bit.

She felt a small smile grow onto her lips as she moved outside the bathroom. "Take your time," she replied, leaning against the wall outside the bathroom.

Eren finished his business and exited the bathroom. He saw the girl standing outside, she seemed to be in deep thought.

"Let's go," Eren said, taking his keys out of his pocket and heading down the stairs.

The girl slowly followed behind him as he made his way outside, she felt the cooler air hit her skin causing her to shiver. She totally forgot how chilly the air was, rubbing her arms for warmth she stopped noticing the car he walked up to. He had a nice car, tinted windows, freshly clean, he seemed to know how take care of it.

"Hop in," he said, unlocking the passenger side door.

She got in and shut the door, feeling the cool leather of his seats go up against her skin. Making her shiver and goosebumps litter onto her skin.

Eren couldn't help but notice how nervous she seemed, he wasn't a creep. He didn't have bad intentions with her at all, she just seemed to be having a bad night, so he wanted to be of some help. Even if she didn't ever speak to him again.

"I know you're nervous and I know what you're thinking, but trust me I'm not going to do anything bad to you. I just wanted to be a cool person and help you out, since you were crying and you were by yourself." Eren said, breaking the silence between them.

She nodded, swallowing thickly. "I see.. what's your name?" she asked, nodding.

"Eren.. and you?" he asked, turning on the car to heat it up.

"(Y/N)," she replied, putting her seatbelt on as he began to drive his car away from the house.

Her name was pretty to Eren.

"Do you want to get some McDonald's? I don't know about you but food makes me feel better," he said, throwing a smile her way.

(Y/N) looked his way and smiled a bit. "Yeah.. sure, um I can pay for myself," she said, searching through her small purse she had with her.

Eren looked over. "Nah don't worry about it. I can pay for ya," he replied, turning into the McDonald's. "What do you want?" he asked, looking into her (e/c) eyes.

She pondered for a moment on what she wanted. "Chicken nuggets," she replied, giggling a bit.

Eren shot her a toothy smile. "Those are my favorite so I'm gonna get the same," he said, turning to the drive-thru.

He ordered their food and gave the bag to her as he drove to one of the empty parking spaces. She felt a bit more comfortable with him now, he seemed chill. She was starting to trust him, she felt relieved knowing he wasn't trying to do anything weird or dangerous.

Eren looked at her before putting the car in park. "Alright, let's get snacking." he said, removing his seatbelt.

(Y/N) gave the bag to him, moving her body so she was against the door. She removed her seatbelt and watched as Eren tossed her chicken nuggets. She put it on the armrest between them, and watched as he started eating.

"Thank you... for the food," she said, looking up at him.

Eren looked up and nodded. "Oh yeah, no problem! Party food was the worst, I drank too so I wanted something to eat." he replied, taking a sip of his drink.

(Y/N) started to eat her food and the two chatted about things. Getting to know each other, which made her feel a little more comfortable. They actually went to colleges that were close by, and they knew a few of the same people.

"Then this one time I almost poured the chemicals down the drain, and the teacher almost killed me!" Eren said, laughing at the memory. "I never saw a teacher more pissed off than ever," he added, rolling his eyes playfully.

She giggled a bit, looking down at her food. "Duh! That's like, one of the first things you learn in chemistry!" she replied, laughing even more.

He rolled his eyes once again, adjusting his bun. "So what? Sometimes you gotta live on the edge or whatever," he said, looking at the different cars driving past on the road. "Oh! By the way, what's your address? I'm sure you'll want to be home after this," he asked, taking his phone to open Maps.

(Y/N) looked over at him. "Oh! Um.. let me put it in," she replied, taking his phone from him. She felt a bit sad that it had to end, she kind of liked his vibe. He seemed chill and like a cool dude.

She handed his phone back to him after putting her address in. "Alright, you don't live too far. Let's get going," he said, putting his seatbelt on and starting the car.

"Wait!" she said, looking at him.

Eren stopped and furrowed his brows. "What's up? Did I do something?" he asked, nodding at her.

She looked away for a second. "Um.. Eren, do you have to drop me off right now?" she asked, avoiding his gaze.

He furrowed his brows in confusion. "I just figured you wanted to be home since it was late, why?" he asked.

(Y/N) sighed. "I just... um, would it be weird if we hung out a little longer? Of course we don't have to," she asked, nodding.

Eren smiled. "No that's not weird at all, just tell me where you wanna go," he said, looking at her.

She felt heat rush onto her cheeks seeing his smile, Eren was charming to (Y/N) and even though they just met, she enjoyed talking to him.

"Um.. just take me wherever! We can go anywhere," she replied, putting her seatbelt on.

Eren smirked. "Alright! I know where to go," he replied, putting the car in reverse and driving out of the parking lot.

-

The rest of the car ride was so much fun. Eren and (Y/N) jammed to music, cracked jokes, stopped for ice cream, and even told each other funny stories.

Eren pulled into this clearing on a hill, showing a view of the city and the highway. The lights in the distance gave a perfect view of everything. (Y/N) was surprised seeing such a pretty view, she never knew something like this ever existed. If she knew she'd come up here often, she was always a fan of views, and so was Eren.

"Let's go," Eren said, opening his car door and exiting his car.

(Y/N) followed and stood next to the hood of his car, which Eren was sitting on. She felt a bit awkward and shy in the moment.

"Oh.. my bad, my ass takes a lot of space. You don't have to sit," he said, giving a weak smile.

(Y/N) laughed a bit, climbing to sit next to him. She felt the metal on the back of her legs, causing her to shiver, as well as the cooler air that surrounded her.

"You cold?" Eren asked, looking at the way she was shivering.

She giggled a bit and nodded her head. "Y-Yeah.. my fault for wearing this," she replied, adjusting the skirt she was wearing.

Eren got off the hood of the car and went to the backseat, he grabbed a black cotton blanket he always kept back there. Sometimes before classes he would take a snooze in his car, and he used the blanket for warmth.

"Here.. I uh, take naps before class." he said, handing the blanket to (Y/N).

She reached for it, feeling his fingertips brush against hers, making small sparks come from his touch. His fingers felt.. warm. She wrapped the blanket around her frame, feeling the warmth surrounding her made her feel cozy.

"Thank you.. really, you didn't have to do this." she said, looking over at Eren.

He stared at the city lights. "It's no problem, you looked like you needed some cheering up anyway," he said, bumping his elbow into her arm.

(Y/N) looked into his green eyes which were twinkling in the light. "You never mentioned why your night was shitty," she said, nodding her head at him.

Eren felt the disappointment coming back to him about Mina. "O-Oh! Yeah, uh.. it's a lot really," he said, looking towards the girl. "I can tell you," he added.

She smiled. "I have time," she replied, adjusting herself a bit and wrapping the blanket around her a bit tighter.

Eren sighed, staring at the ground. "I got ditched tonight by a girl who I thought liked me. I was kind of stupid to ignore how she was acting, I guess in a way I should have taken the signs, but I liked her too much. She was supposed to join me tonight at the party but she never showed, so I guess that's the end of that," he said, shrugging his shoulders.

(Y/N) felt bad for him, nobody deserves to have that happen to them. Eren seemed like a nice guy to her as well, she couldn't exactly see why a girl would pass up on him.

"That's really mean... I couldn't imagine being ditched by a guy. I'd probably feel so embarrassed," she said, looking towards him. "How long have you guys been talking?" she asked.

"Three weeks? Almost maybe a month? I was planning on asking her out tonight too but I guess she had other plans," Eren replied, leaning on his elbows.

(Y/N) nodded, staring at the ground.

"Say... you never told me why you were crying, do you wanna talk about it? No force," he asked, leaning up to look at her face.

A frown formed onto her lips thinking about the events that occurred. "Yeah I feel like I need to vent," she replied, putting her knees to her chest.

Eren turned to face her. "Ready when you are," he said, giving her a reassuring smile.

Her smile grew as he looked at her. "Well um, my boyfriend- well now ex-boyfriend cheated on me a few weeks ago, he hooked up with someone I was close with. My friends brought me to that party to sort of 'let loose' in a way, then they ended up ditching me. I didn't know anybody there, so I just went to the bathroom and broke down." she explained, feeling a few tears well into her eyes.

Eren felt a tug at his heart hearing what she had to say. He couldn't imagine what she was going through right now, especially with her ex.

"I'm so sorry (Y/N), those people aren't your friends for sure. You should honestly stop talking to them," he said, crossing his arms.

She laughed a bit, wiping the tears from her cheeks. "It's just been hard you know? None of them seemed to care when he cheated on me, and they sort of just brushed my problems away." she said, shrugging her shoulders. "It sucks telling you this," she added.

Eren placed his hand on her wrist. "I get it, what you're going through is so difficult. Having people around who don't care are the worst and it sucks seeing you this way, you seem like a really cool girl! Well, from what I've seen anyway. That's besides the point, you're really cool and those people don't deserve you. Your ex is also an asshole too," he said, rolling his eyes.

She smiled a bit at his words. Nobody really said that kind of stuff to her before.

"Same goes to you, you seem like a nice guy, and whoever that girl was who ditched you, she's missing out." (Y/N) said, smiling at him.

Eren chuckled a bit. "I guess in a way we both had a shitty night, but it ended pretty great." he said, looking at the sky.

"Eren... thank you for everything. If you didn't find me in that bathroom I probably would be eating ice cream and sobbing to Twilight right now," she said, laughing a bit.

He smiled. "No problem (Y/N), if I didn't find you I'd probably be at home watching some stupid sports compilation," he said, laughing along with her.

(Y/N) leaned against the windshield. "Do you want to head back?" she asked, looking towards him.

He sat up, stretching a bit. "Yeah sure," he replied, standing up and heading towards the drivers seat of the car.

The two hopped in and drove back to (Y/N)'s apartment, the drive felt long, but their company kept each other in good moods.

Eren pulled into the parking area and looked towards (Y/N). "Tonight was fun," she said, smiling at him.

A smile grew onto his lips. "Yeah it was, you made tonight great." he replied, putting his car in park.

(Y/N) grabbed her stuff. "Well... thank you really, you made me feel a bit better. I appreciate you a ton," she said, unbuckling her seatbelt.

"Yeah, no problem at all," he replied, looking towards the front of the building.

He unlocked the car and watched her get out.

"Wait!" Eren said, stopping her in her tracks.

(Y/N) looked back at him. "What's up?" she asked, nodding a bit

Eren grabbed his phone from his pocket and handed it to her. "May I.. get your number?" he asked, smiling a bit at her as a blush formed onto his face.

She felt heat rush onto her cheeks, taking his phone in her hands. "Of course," she said, smiling as she entered her number into his phone. "Text me tonight, we should facetime." she added, handing his phone back to him.

Eren smiled, taking his phone back. "I'd love that," he replied, smiling again at her.

"See you then, and drive safe!" she said, closing his car door.

He watched as she entered her apartment building, Eren smiled to himself thinking about what happened tonight.

Who knew being ditched would lead to this?

[thou-crusty-batch-of-nature]

Je me laisserai derrière

-I will leave myself behind-

requested by @seriouslysiriuss: hello :))) could i request with prompts 9, 12 and 18 with either sirius or remus?? congrats again on 100 followers!! 🤍🤍💕💕

9."I love you!" "Lying has never been a good look on you.."

12."She's not yours." 

18."Is that my shirt?" 

A/N: ngl i spent so much time working on this fic and i hope with all my heart that you like it:)) thank you so much @approved-by-dentists​ for beta reading it and letting me rant about this fic<333

pairing: sirius x reader

warnings: fluff and a lot of angst™ (i warned you)

gif not mine

You could feel every wall you tried so desperately to hold up shatter one by one. You could feel your heart bleed from the shards they left behind. How could you pretend you were fine? You held your breath and squeezed your eyes shut, trying to hold your tears back, but your mind kept replaying all those moments you spent together. As if it tried to show your foolish heart what went wrong - where and when you stopped being enough. But how could you ever be enough for him? 

You let your head fall back, hitting the bedpost. You saw your reflection in the mirror on your desk and your eyes - your betraying eyes - slipped to the side of the bed where he used to sit. Where he used to hug you and play with your hair, then tell you how everything would be alright. You needed that lie right now. 

You slid against the bedpost until you let yourself lie on the floor. How many lies did he speak as truths?How many times did you believe him, even when your instincts told you otherwise? He could have told you the sun sets in the east and you would have believed him. You felt numb. You felt like a fool. You still loved him. And that hurt you the most. 

You started crying again. 

***

You got up. It was 4:11 am and you couldn't sleep. It was unexpectedly hot for this time of the year - it was autumn, for crying out loud, you only had jumpers packed! And with Sirius, the human-heater himself, holding you in his arms all night - not that you were complaining :) - you felt like a pumpkin pie in the oven. 

You catch sight of Sirius' t-shirt thrown on a chair. Should you…? I mean, no one was wearing it right now, so who would mind? You confidently slid out of his arms, careful not to wake him, took the shirt and quickly changed your festive pajamas. T’was a bit oversized, but it’s too comfortable for you to mind. You quietly went back to sleep. 

You were woken up by the sound of your alarm. You opened your eyes and saw him - you thought he looked angelic in the morning; his dark curls messily fell on his chiseled face, his full rosy lips sketching a smile every time he felt your touch. You slowly grazed his cheekbone and kissed him, and he tightened his embrace, giving into the kiss. 

He opened his eyes, seeming more awake than ever. He gave you a ravishing smile and kissed you again. 

"Morning Sirius is my favourite." you admitted, aware of the blush blooming on your cheeks. 

"So do you just take advantage of me in the evenings and afternoons? You are so cruel." 

"No, I also love Padfoot." 

"Do you now? I didn't know I was that good at licking…" he unceremoniously declared. 

"You aren't, I just like it when you don't talk." 

"How fascinating!" He propped his chin in his palm, smirking. "Then let me show you what I can do when I don't speak!" 

He tried to kiss you again, but you quickly pushed him and jumped out of the bed. "As much as I wish to do that, we have Transfiguration in 10 and I don't think Minnie would love it very much if we arrived late for the third time this week." you explained, though Sirius wasn't listening. He wasn't even pretending to, as his eyes were travelling all over your body. 

" Is that my shirt?" he got up and asked you in his morning raspy voice. 

" Yes… I was too hot last night and it was the only thing I could find. I can take it off if it bothers you or-" you played it off innocently. Oh, how you liked this game! 

"Love, the only thing that bothers me right now is that we have to go to class." Then, he plodded to the bathroom and took what you assumed to be a freezing cold shower.

***

Sirius lit his third cigarette. 

He didn't think he could hate himself more. Why did he have to ruin every good thing he had in his life? Every time he closed his eyes he saw you. You, sitting with your head in his lap, roses bloomed on your cheeks; you, in the library working on your essay, biting your lip in frustration and now you, sitting by the door of his dorm, blood drained from your face as you saw him with that girl. 

He knew he lost you. He ran after you to your dorm, and when you closed the door in his face he realised: you were gone. He ruined everything you two had, he ruined you. 

He let himself get scared. He had everything he wished for and more, and when he realised you weren't going to leave, he panicked. 

He waited. He waited three hours by the door, listening to your sniffles, then screams, then silence. The silence was the hardest to bear - it was when he realised how deep the scars he left behind would be. 

After that he left. And now he was by the lake. He finished his cigarette and threw it in the water. He hated himself. 

He let his head fall in his hands. Then, he cried. 

***

"You see that? That geometrical hotdog dog constellation, that is Canis Major!" He drew the figure with his wand. "And that -" he pointed to a star "-that is Sirius!" 

You were lying on the quidditch field, watching the stars. "It really is the brightest star in the sky!" you pointed out. 

"Well, did you expect any less from me?" 

"My petty small puppy!" you cooed. "Who is the brightest? You are, yes you are!" you ruffled his curls, earning a growl. "You know, sometimes you act more like a dog when you are a person than when you transform!" 

"I sometimes think you like Padfoot more than me!" 

"I do, but you do know I'm a cat person, don't you?" you asked in your most nonchalant voice. You didn't think you'd ever seen Sirius this disgusted before. 

"But - but they are so MEAN!" he whined. 

"Relax - I'm kidding! Cats are barely in my top 10!" 

"Then which are your favourites?" 

"Definitely stags!"

***

Lily was tired. 

She got to her dorm late after spending her whole afternoon in the library, studying with James. She felt her heart clench when she saw you sleeping on the floor, dried tears glimmering in the dim moonlight. 

She carried you to your bed and tucked you in, then sat next to you. She stayed up all night, holding you tight, making sure you wouldn't be alone if you woke up. The next morning, she kissed your forehead and promised to bring you breakfast when you refused to get up. 

She sat down next to James, who seemed just as tired as she was. He pushed a plate filled with food in front of her. 

"Sirius too?" The boys nodded. "The cheater - heartbroken! As if it wasn't his choice!" she retorts angrily. 

"It was a choice he made he will never stop regretting. He hates himself for what he did." James tried to calm her. 

"As he should!" She cut him. "Y/N doesn't deserve this! No one does! Why, why would he do this?" 

"I wish I knew." he whispered. 

"How is she holding up?" Remus asked.

"I found her on the floor last night. She cried herself to sleep." She could swear she saw something break in Remus' eyes.  

After breakfast, she went back to her dorm with a large plate in her hands. She was entering the common room, when she saw him on the sofa, staring at the crackling fire. 

"Lily, wait!" 

"What do you want, Sirius?" Lily snapped and turned to face the boy. Oh, if looks could kill! For a moment, though, she felt bad for the lad. It was safe to say, she thought, that Sirius Black looked just as miserable as you. 

"How is she?" 

"How do you think she is?" 

Not a flicker of emotion, nothing - his face was a blank canvas. "I need to see her." 

The way his voice broke made her eyes soften "She's not yours. Not anymore. I'm sorry." 

Sirius turned to leave. "Why did you do it?" she demanded. He faced her, and Lily saw the tears pooling in his eyes. "Because I'm an idiot. Because I love her so much that I got scared." 

He got up and left. 

***

With the Marauders Map in your hands, you made your way through the deserted halls, trying to find Sirius. You had seen him on the seventh floor, but then his name mysteriously disappeared. You stopped in the place where you'd last seen him and waited. 

Suddenly, an enormous wooden door came into sight. You reluctantly opened it, only to find yourself inside an posh, ancient house. You were in a spacious dark green room, decorated with intricate tapestries. 

The main tapestry depicted several small portraits, all connected through a tree. 'Licorus Black', 'Magenta Black', 'Phineas Nigellus Black', 'Arcturus Black I', 'Hesper Black', and there was 'Sirius Orion Black'! It was the Black's family tree, which meant that you were inside the Grimmauld Place! But where was…? 

You saw Sirius sitting in a corner with a crumpled piece of parchment in his hand. "Sirius?" you asked softly. He lifted his head and you could see pearly tears rolling down his cheeks. 

You sat down next to him and hugged him tightly. "I am here for you. I'll always be. You can tell me when you're ready, or not tell me at all, but I want you to know that you are not alone." His hands sneaked around your waist and he buried his head in the crook of your neck. 

"They disowned me" you heard him whisper. "And I knew I shouldn't care, hell-" his voice broke, "-I hate them, but it still hurts so much." 

You were left speechless.You hated the Blacks with a burning passion, but you knew your fury wouldn't make him feel any better. So you kept quiet, holding him close. 

Sometimes, words weren't enough. Sometimes, simply being there for someone was the only thing that helped. You gave them time and space. And sometimes, that meant the world. 

***

You skipped all your classes and called in sick. You stayed in your bed for two days, thinking and crying. The only times you tried to act fine were when Lily came in the evenings. Even then, you'd ask her about him. You felt pathetic. 

Today it was the Hogsmeade trip, which meant you could go anywhere in the castle and be all by yourself. Truth was, the weather was fantastic; it was the first sunny day in months of cold gloomy autumn. It was 12 o'clock when you made your way to the kitchen to fetch some food, then ate it in silence in the Great Hall.

After that, you walked by the Black Lake and sat down in your usual spot. This place carried so many memories, memories you grew to hate. You were staring at the water, watching the sun reflect off the waves when you saw the shadow of a silhouette nearing you. 

Of course it's him. He sat down next to you, copying your actions. 

"So many things have happened in this spot." he said nostalgically. 

"What are you doing here?" you retort. 

"I'm sorry." 

"Answer the question. What are you doing here?" 

"I needed to talk to you." 

"Why?" 

"I owe you an explanation." 

"You owe me a fucking big explanation, Sirius Black." you responded, "But that's not what I was talking about. Why did you do it?" you tried to hold your tears back. 

"I got scared."

"You got scared!" you chuckled drily. "Of what? Me?" 

"Of myself. I lost so many things, Y/N. When you came into my life, it was as if I saw the sun for the first time." A tear rolled down his cheek, but he didn't bother to wipe it. "I loved you so much that I got scared that if I ever were to lose you, I wouldn't be able to bear it. That it would destroy me." he turned to face you. "I still do. I love you."

"Lying has never been a good look on you." you scowl. "If you'd loved me that much, you wouldn't have cheated in the first place." Tears were streaming down your face. "Was it me? Was I not enough?" 

"I wasn't enough. And I will never be. I don't deserve you." he admits. 

"You are a fool, a stupid fool, Sirius." 

"I am truly sorry, Y/N." 

"Me too." 

You both stayed by the lake for hours without saying a word - pretending that you're fine, not wanting to let go.

***

"I love you, Y/N Y/L/N. I love you more than anything in my life." he whispered, taking your hand in his. You stood next to him, your head on his shoulder, watching the sun hide under the waters of the Black Lake. 

"I love you too. And I could never stop loving you."

 taglist: @futurewriter2000, @puppycat714, @booksbeforebois, @screennamealreadyused, @fific7

[violexides]

fic recs (part 1?)

hi!!! so @n3tn0b0dy sent me an ask about fic recs, and i am stupid so it took me a few mins to like. compose myself and figure out what this is. i am definitely absolutely going to miss a few fics here, which is why it is a part one. i will probably keep this short-ish??? maybe go into more detailed ones later :eyes: 

(i am realizing i am going to write essays for these and for that i am very sorry)

something close to domestic, maybe by @mystxmomo (hi!)

definitely one of my favorite danganronpa fics, currently and (probably) forever. it’s a mature rated kamukoma fic, following an AU in which, instead of the remnants being captured and taken to jabberwock, despair sort of... fizzles out on its own, leaving the remnants of despair-- and the rest of the world-- to sort of heal with it. it’s in a series with another fic, that is in the same universe but following a different narrative with different central characters, and though it only has one chapter rn i highly rec that too. 

i like this fic for many reasons and to avoid prattling on, i will bullet point it.

- easy to follow. there are not overly complex structures-- not that that is inherently a bad thing, i also tend to love that style-- which makes it easy to digest.

- strong emotional impact. this fic has made me cry very, very often.

- really good characterization. mystxmomo is very good with characterization overall, especially with kamukura and servant, and that really shows with this fic.

- a compelling plot that still retains a slice-of-life format. i don’t really know how else to elaborate here.

- an idiosyncratic look into their dynamic. this fic explores kamukoma in the process of them healing, which is pretty distinctively different to a lot of kamukoma fics. obviously, this is not to shade those other fics, but, yeah. i really like it. 

okay sorry for rambling very much there, i really highly recommend it, it is a ongoing multichapter (i should have said that earlier i apologize) and the writer is also very cool. 

--

postscript by zombiekittiez

this is actually a series. it currently has three fics-- one that is fully completed (defy you stars), one that is a completed oneshot (supersonic man outta you), and an ongoing multichapter with pretty frequent updates (prince of a thousand). this follows a post-SDR2 storyline, with a lot of ships and dynamics within it, but heaviest emphasis on komahina. 

more bullet points! yay 

- the characterization is god-fucking-tier. this author is very, very good at characterizing these characters and i will not shut up about it ever actually. they feel real, and distinct, and flawed, and alive, and i love everything about it.

- good exploration of dynamics! i think the latter two fics especially shows this off really well. the friendships and relationships built are all pretty different from each other, but all feel like a pretty natural progression, sticking true to the characters, and feels very... real. which i like a whole hell of a lot.

- there are so many literature references and i am happy about it. there are also sparknotes-ish things at the ending notes of each chapter, which translates the quote, explains the significance within its own text, and applies it to the fanfiction. they are used in ways that make sense, too-- they don’t feel forced.

- the plot and plot building is SO fucking good. prince of a thousand has so many cliffhangers and i am very happy but also dying.

anyway, i really rec this series! be mindful of the tags and the ratings on some of the fics, but they are really, really good reads. 

--

absent mind by galaxyaqua

okay. this is a v3 oneshot rec, exploring pregame rantaro, as well as his relationship with tsumugi shirogane. it’s rated “teen and up audiences”, and. holy shit, okay.

- the writing style of this is GORGEOUS. i don’t know what it is about the writing style, but it feels so much like rantaro is talking, which is so fucking cool, and i love that so fucking much??? i can’t even explain it, but it is seriously super neat. 

- the EMOTIONS. this fic is so fucking emotional, honestly? it shows you this realistic, flawed, you could consider broken, character, shows them finding some hope, and shows the loss that comes with that. it’s so fucking incredible, and the lines have stuck with me even now, and it’s been a bit since i’ve last read. i think about the last couple lines especially a lot.

- these impactful one liners. holy shit. every line means something in this fic, and it’s so fucking cool and incredible, and i just??? holy shit??? i really love this fic???

i will say that this fic is sort of depressing in places, but i highly, and i mean highly, recommend. it is not a super difficult read, and it’s super, super fucking good. so i really recommend it. 

--

this sickness will save us by starrylitme // i believe this is @magioftheseas i am super sorry if it isn’t

okay. super, super fucking big content warning. this fic is a yikes, and the tags can sum it up a LOT better, but yeah. just keep that in mind. 

that being said, this is a really gorgeously written oneshot centered around soulmate au kamukoma, exploring the sort of... unhealthy aspects of their relationship. and i. Wow. okay.

- these fucking one liners. holy SHIT. i remember some of these scenes and lines so very well, and it does live in my head rent free. 

- the tone of this. the tone, and the mood created, is so fucking... i don’t even know how to describe it. terrifying? eerie? super fucking intriguing? it shows this shitty situation in an appropriately terrifying light, and it inflects so much emotion and connotation into the scenes, and holy shit. like, if i wanted to do a case study of incredible tonal work and diction and all, i would absolutely grab this fic.

- the characterization. while kamukura and komaeda are placed in a very interesting predicament, they still manage to stay pretty damn close to being in character, which i personally think is super remarkable. it almost enhances the circumstances too, ngl. 

- their dynamic. their dynamic in this fic is NOT healthy, and that is shown in full “glory”, in a very messy and dysfunctional and terrifying way, and i absolutely love it. it has a kind of realism to it, almost a cautionary tale but not quite, a sort of “this isn’t very good but it still feels grounded in realism”. and wow. Wow. it’s so fucking good.

mind the tags, but definitely rec this one. 

-- 

some scattered accounts i will gush about and if they have a tumblr account i will do my best to tag it. 

@kidcarma, same name on ao3. 

- okay, cam is just super fucking talented with characterization, and i adore all of their fics so fucking much? the way they characterize komaeda, kamukura, and hinata resonate super hard, and i just. really love their stuff. they are also absolutely wonderful so please support them do it why aren’t you doing it just kidding haha unle

@celestial-nova, celestial_nova on ao3

- nova is my best friend and i fucking love her, also her writing is fucking art. does a lot of naegiri and some stuff out of this fandom, but i seriously recommend her stuff. she’s really fucking talented and absolutely incredible and i adore her so very much. 

sinnohremaker on ao3

- their stuff is MAJORLY cathartic to me and they are also super sweet, love them a lot.

shutupnerd on ao3

- SHE IS REALLY TALENTED, I LOVE HER WORKS!! they are also super cool and i just appreciate her a lot fksdc,mxv, her fic “an account of events” is really good

@whatsupscythia, hinataisnothim on ao3

- i fucking love her writing, does some really good hinata prose, highly recommend it

----

i am ABSOLUTELY forgetting people, i am ABSOLUTELY forgetting fics, and i am ABSOLUTELY going to bash my head into a wall when i realize i have forgotten people, but uhm here is an impromptu list. i hope this was good? idk how to do fic recs. uhm yes support all these people they are dope

[jamariaaaa]

Late night confession pt 1:

TRIGGER WARNING; S*lf h*rming & S*icide

The ending of 2019 beginning of 2020 was the worst months of my life. (December- April.)

My brother (dog) died five days before my birthday.

I lost a lot of my friends..

My boyfriend aka the only person I could trust left me for my friend.

My parents found out I was depressed and didn’t do anything about it.

I realized I was being taken advantage of. But we aren’t going to get into that today.

Let’s start with my friends.

Friends: so I knew my dog was dying, but I didn’t expect him to die before my birthday. So I began to distance myself from everyone, this girl stayed by my side no matter what, and so did my boyfriend. He knew not to talk about dogs around me, because I would automatically breakdown. Obviously people thought I was being fake, and they left then and there. I can say it’s my fault, but I didn’t want to cry around people 24/7 about an animal. That’s very obnoxious right?

Getting left for my friend; Getting taken for advantage: so it’s December 2nd. Four days before my dog dies, 9 days before my birthday. I had a sinus infection so I was feeling like shit. My boyfriend at the time came up to me, he could see I was distraught. He took it as if I was mad at him, it hurt to talk. I didn’t want to talk. I wasn’t ignoring him. So I tried to talk to him, but he pushed me away. So I went to gym, yeah I lost most of my friends but I had some good kids in gym who liked me. So my best friend came up to me, she could tell I was PISSED, hell even some of her homeboys could tell I wasn’t having it. So there I was, I hot mess, stuttering, shaking. It was bad. And the worst part was, I had class with him after that. That continued for two days until the fourth. I finally had enough, he wasn’t going to talk to me, so I got my cousin. My cousin is around 250 pounds and up, (113 kg.) I finally got him to talk to me. I was already pissed once again. And when I’m mad, I start crying. So I was crying, I guess that ‘broke his heart’ because once he seen that I was crying he started apologizing, my dumbass accepted that shit.

The taken advantage part.. sheeesh. I never noticed but this ass, took advantage of my body BAD. I hate people touching me, but he would always find ways to touch my bum or even seek his hands into my pants, NOT OKAY. But I never wanted to say anything because I was afraid he was going to leave me. Which he did in the end. Whatever. But after we did breakup, it seemed like he still wanted me around but hated me at the same time. We had Spanish together so that was worst. Every time I would see him, I would automatically go into a shaking/twitching spell, and it wouldn’t stop until class ending. Anyway one particular day, I was sitting with him, and we were talking random shit. Sometimes I say things that don’t come out right (18+) and I guess he took it For real. When I looked back up from my paper, I seen his dick. Like he whipped it out it class. I tried to ignore him, until I had to tie my fucking shoe. GOD I HATE MY SHOE NOW. After I tied it, he grabbed my head and shoved me down on to his member. Very disgusting, we weren’t dating anymore and this was fucking forced. Ngl I had feelings for him still, I did touch it a couple of times, I’m not going to make him the villain, but what he did wasn’t right.

Back to the break up topic: it was January 22nd(?) idk fuck the date. So we got in an argument for whatever reason, and that’s when he broke up with me, I was already suffering, I felt like the black sheep in my household and I didn’t have a shoulder to lean on and cry. That sucked the most. So after he broke up with me, I just went incognito. I stopped going to school for a couple of days. And even when I did go to school, I would call my grandma to come get me. It made me so sick, I woke up shaking one day. Could barley walk nor talk. I was hurt. I felt like my world was ending. I wanted to die. Not because of getting broken up with, but just not being enough for everyone. My grades were slipping and so was my mind. There was a bunch of times where I would just think about killing myself then and there. Nobody knew of these thoughts but my sister.. even so then she told my mom and what did I get? Yelled at. At that point I wasn’t having it. I was self harming myself and all. The cuts were pretty bad to the point where, when my heart would beat you could see the heartbeat movement thumping through my left breast. Yes it’s supposed to do that when your heartbeat is hard or something like that. I think it only happens when you’re nervous. But every time I would step out of a quiet place, I would have an anxiety attack, even if it was going on the bus.

This leads me to my last topic, my parents finding out I was depressed: this was in April, the found out from my eldest sister. They acted like I didn’t know what love was and how it felt to be heartbroken. They said I didn’t have depression and it was for attention. They didn’t even try to have a talk with me about anything, just constant yelling. Even my middle sister said it was wrong for them to do, I really didn’t want to live after that. I couldn’t even sleep in my bed that night. I got in the shower and sat on the floor facing the wall for twenty minutes, just rocking back and forth, I didn’t feel loved at all. That night I slept with my sister, she knew how I felt. I actually prayed that I would die in my sleep that night. But to them it was just tough love.

Honestly it took me a while to write this confession. I haven’t healed completely from the twitching and anxiety. But I’m fine now. I think the entire yelling part from my parents helped me out, because now I’m not as soft as I was anymore. I know this is all over the place but I tried to write it without crying like a dumbass, I SUCCEEDED!! Well yeah, this was an late night confession:))) heh I really do like those pictures :)) (while writing this, I’m listening to crossing fields by LiSA. I WANNA DANCE.. but it’s 4:22 in the morning. Hahah)

[lil-loucifer]

ONE OF US MUST CHANGE AND IT AINT GONNA BE ME YOU FOOL. Ps 1-100 on the ask away tumblr asks

Hayden you f u c k

1. What have you eaten today?

A shit ton of pizza

2. Who was your last kiss with? Was it pleasant?

The most intimate touch I have ever felt was a hug

3. What color shoes did you last wear?

Black. Boots :P

4. Who has made you laugh the hardest in the last week?

Probably my sister??

5. What is your favorite scent?

Freshly baked stuff

6. What is your favorite season? Why?

Winter, because most if not all of my clothes are fucking winter sweaters and coats

And also because I like the cold

7. Can you do a handstand or cartwheel?

Nope!!

8. What color are your nails?

Natural?

9. If you had to get a tattoo on your face to save your life, what would it be?

A tiny star near the corner of my right eye, behind the mole so I could just hide it under my hair if I had to

10. What is something you find romantic?

Fucking flowers??? I dunno dude pretty much anything you devote some time and/or effort into doing for someone else in the name of affection?

11. Are you happy?

I dunno tbh

12. Is there anything in particular making you happy or sad?

For one thing, I did a fucking bomb-ass job on a presentation I had to do in front of a class, even though I couldn’t log into google drive and couldn’t access my fucking notes for the presentation and had to improvise it

13. Dogs or Cats?

Both!!!

15. Which do you prefer:a museum, a night club, the forest or a library?

A tie between a library and museum, but it depends on the museum. 

15. What is your style?

Scruffy as fuck, with some degree of hipster/punk, but mostly just slobbish.

16. If you could be doing anything you like right now, what would it be?

Affording material possessions I want to buy

17. Are you in a relationship or single?

“It’s complicated”

18. What makes you attracted to the person you like right now?

Emotional dependence???

Also probably mutual trust and care

19. If you could replace your partner/best friend with a celebrity of your choice, would you? Who with?

I don’t think I would??

20. Are you holding on to something you need to let go of? If so then what? 

Certain text conversations and shit my last ex and I had. It didn’t end well between us.

21. How did you celebrate last Halloween?

I stayed home and handed out fuckin candy

22. Have you recently made any big decisions? 

I dunno.

23. Were you ever in a school play?

Nahhh, I’m not a good actor

24. What movie would you use to describe your life?

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

25. Is there something you have dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

HAVING FRIENDS BUT I CAN’T BECAUSE I HABITUALLY ACT LIKE A HUGE BITCH ALL THE TIME AND AM INTIMIDATED WHENEVER I’M INTRODUCED INTO GROUPS AND YET I’M STILL CLINGY AS SHIT

26. Complete this sentence, “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…”

Video games. I dunno man I just like playing games with people

27. What are two things that irritate you about the same sex?

A lot of guys are really gross and shit, and also sexist or alpha male-like. I catch myself exhibiting similar behavior sometimes and hate it

28. What are two things that irritate you about the opposite sex?

I’m too immature to understand anything

29. What is the best thing that has happened to you this week?

Pretty much reached a lvl 2 friendship with someone after we both let it slip that we were bi within three minutes of each other

30. What is something that makes you sad when you think about it?

Sad friends

31. How long was your longest relationship?

One business week

32. Have you ever been in love?

You know? I dunno 

33. Are you currently in love?

I think so?

34. Why did your last relationship end?

We were both in really bad mental places and decided to break up so we wouldn’t hurt each other

35. What jewelry are you wearing right now, and where did you get it

I’m not wearing any???

36. When was the last time you cried and why?

I don’t remember when, but it was definitely over feeling super alone

37. Name someone pretty.

Deborah Ann Woll??

38. What did you receive last Valentines Day?

I didn’t do shit last valentine’s day

39. Do you get jealous easily?

Kinda, but I don’t let it fuck up my relationships

40. Have you ever been cheated on?

Maybe?

41. Do you trust your partner/best friend?

Yeah!!

42. Ever had detention?

Kinda? I don’t remember it well but I think I talked my way out of it

43. Would you rather live in the countryside or the city?

I don’t know to be honest, probably the city if I could afford it

44. What do people call you? 

LUCIFER, THE DARK LORD OF THE NINE HELLS

45. What was the last book you read? 

The Ship of the Dead, by Rick Riordan

46. How big of a nerd/dork are you? 

Huge, but I don’t look the part. Someone once asked me “Hey, do you watch One Punch Man?” and his other annoying friend hastily whispered “Does he look like he watches One Punch Man?? Don’t annoy him bro” and they never asked again

I was, in fact, fully caught up with the anime at that point

47. What kind of music do you listen to?

All fuckin kinds bruh, mostly punk rock, metal and hip-hop tho

48. How tall are you?

5′10′’ I think??

49. Do you like kids?

Not really

50. Favorite fruits?

Grapes, apple and watermelon

51. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?

I haven’t owned a pair of sweatpants since I was ten

52. What’s your earliest memory?

I was still really young, maybe two-ish?? Either my sister or my mother--she was female--put me down on the floor in what would become my sister’s room, long before we moved most of her new furniture in and repainted her walls, next to a belt she would keep for the next ten years and an old comb she still has now. It was mid-day. 

53. Ever had a poem or song written about you or to you?

Nope!

54. Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Behind! Photography is fun~

55. Do you have a collection of anything? 

Video games?

56. Do you save money or spend it? 

I suck at saving money ffs

57. What would your dream house be like?

Simple and clean, full of my stuff

58. What top 5 things make you the angriest?

1: Maliciousness

2: Oppression

3: Bothering my crew

4: Bothering me

5: Losing repeatedly in video games

59. What top 5 things always brings a smile to your face?

1: Things that make me laugh

2: Writing a story easily

3: Pretty much anything to do with you ngl

4: Friends!!

5: Seeing an asshole get what’s coming

60. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

Y o u r e g o n n a h a t e m e i f I a n s w e r e d h o n e s t l y

61: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

Honestly I’d probably tell everyone I’m dying and face it with open arms

62. Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

Beat

63. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

I dunno???

64. Do you like the beach?

I like the aesthetic appeal of the beach?? But I hate water and heat and sand, so... 

65. Ever sleep on the couch or a bed with someone special?

Never had a chance

66. Do you have a middle name? If so what is it!

Mayor

67. Do you talk to yourself?

I think out loud sometimes, but otherwise, no

68. Describe your hair.

Floofy

69. What is the meaning of life.

To find one

70. What is your ideal partner like?

You ;)

But for realsies, someone I can trust and feel comfortable around

71. Do you want to get married?

Not really??

72. Do you want to have kids?

NOT REALLY???

73. Like or dislike your family?

Neutral

74. Are you Chunky or Slim?

Chunky?

75. Would you consider yourself smart? 

No

76. What would you change about your life? 

My drive do do literally anything

77. Religious or Not?

Kinda?

78. You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?

The cop that pulls me over for drunk driving

79. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?

I dunno man depends on how long I’m alone there

80. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?

You

81. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?

Either cuddling or legitimately fighting each other over who changes outfits in Animal Crossing

82. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in?

They are already here

83. Do you like when people play with your hair? 

Yeah, if I let them.

84. Do you like bubble baths?

I dunno, I haven’t ever had one.

85. Have you ever been pulled over by a cop?

Nope!

86. Have you ever danced in the rain?

Yeeeaaaah! And I didn’t get sick!

87. Do you trust anyone with your life?

Not really

88. What was your first thought when you woke up this morning?

As usual, “whhhaat fucking time is it??”

89. If money wasn’t an issue, what top 10 places would you travel to? (You get to stay at each place for a week) 

I’m not really into travelling???

90. How was your day today?

Average

91. Play an instrument? 

I suck at anything musical

92. Describe the what you think of the ocean.

Boundless, infinite. Terror beneath. 

93. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts?

Both!!

94. Honestly, are things how you wanted them to be? 

I can’t really say. I had a goal in mind, and just planned to improvise until I got there, so...

95. Do you have a mean bitchy scary side?

Yes and it is my default demeanor for most of the time

96. When are you vulnerable?

...All the time

97. How much free time do you have?

Too much, honestly

98. Do you like to go hiking? 

Hell no

99. Odd or Even Numbers?

Even?

100. Would you ever go sky diving, bungee jumping , cliff diving, wing suit gliding, parasailing, snorkeling, or other extreme activities? 

The most extreme thing I’ve done is knife fighting, does that count?