#ngl this is just a thirst set

[dat-town]

baby, you and me are a twisted fantasy

Characters: marine biologist intern!Leehan & siren!female reader

Setting & genre: dark urban fantasy au, angst

Summary: Donghyun finds a captured siren in the basement of the oceanology institute he works for and falls more in love with the sea while you learn that maybe not all humans are all bad.

Warnings: birth name used, blood, needles, cut wounds, captivity, unethical experiments, mentions of unorthodox surgical procedures, bodily alterations (MC’s scales are removed), starvation, drowning, crying, ideation about killing and dying, minor character deaths, lip-to-lip contact that’s not really a kiss? (this gets pretty dark ngl sorry)

Words: 4k

Author’s note: title from aespa - hold on tight. @restlessmaknae, you wanted angst, so i deliver… with love tho! see you in a few hours! <3

Donghyun was in love with the ocean before he was in love with you.

You hated him and everything he stood for before you even met him.

Physical pain was one thing. The way you could feel your lungs collapse, the thirst for just one drop of water before you suffocate, the blood dripping down when one by one your scales were torn out, the burn in your sea-soaked skin drying up…

Being a lab rat was another. It was white coats, needles and gloved fingers prodding into your slippery skin, touching places they shouldn’t with no questions asked. You wished you had enough power to fight back. To scratch, to bite, to kill.

But a bathtub worth of chlorine water was only enough to keep you alive, just barely. You knew they were doing it on purpose, they were smart enough to figure out that they couldn’t keep you locked down if you were stronger. They knew it when they fished you out of the ocean and let you starve, let your skin turn dry and warm. When the first fever hit and your scales started turning stone-like, they finally put you into water from your humid prison just so they could keep experimenting.

You had your eyes closed, too exhausted to move, to react, but you heard their whispers in the white of the room. Human language wasn’t that hard to understand, not with their greed and cruelty. You swore to yourself you would hurt as much as you could at the first chance. You would leave as much damage as you could before ending it all. You would rather have it your way then letting them cast you away like a used toy when they finished taking you apart.

The ocean didn’t forget after all.

Something cold touched your perched lips and your tired eyes fluttered open, waking from your dreamless sleep.

It was his eyes, the first thing you saw. They were the color of wet sand at sunset. They were gentle and kind with the warmth of the Sun. You flinched away nevertheless because you knew this dance, you knew this trick and you wouldn’t fall for it.

Even if every fiber in your body screamed for the water in the glass the boy brought, you turned your head away, letting your long, air-dried hair cover your face. Your cheek pressed against the cold tiles, a little comfort as you ignored the pain of moving with not enough water in your body. You breathed through your mouth harshly, something that didn’t come naturally but you had to learn to do anyway with the poisoned tap water barely reaching your waist in the small space you could call yours.

“You should drink.” Kind Eyes said and even his voice was gentle despite being deep like ocean waves. Humans were so two-faced. How could they lie with not only their words but with their voice too?

“I promise it’s just water,” he added cautiously and anger flared in you.

He knew then. Of course, he knew. That the water they brought you was not to help you but to make you less of a trouble when they unchained you. It made you drowsy, you couldn’t control your own body and dulled your senses. At least it paled the pain too, so when you were lying on their operation tables, you saw the wounds more than you felt them. You were full of zigzag white scars, healed only by water because you were the ocean’s daughter. Such a disappointing one, fallen into the trap of humans.

“Please,” the boy’s voice trembled and it was the last straw because he didn’t get to do that. He had no right to plead when he acted like he was doing you a favour and you were saying no.

You leaped towards him as fast and as hard as you could, your elbow knocking the glass out of his hand that went flying to the ground, leaving shreds of glass and water puddles all over. The metal dug into your wrists as the chains harshly kept you back, your face merely a few inches from the boy’s as you glared at him.

He didn’t even flinch nor did he pull away at the closeness. The other white collared men all looked at you with either disgust or with very human hunger in their eyes. But all of them were afraid of you. They all had their little needles prepared in case you attacked, in case you bared your canines like the predator you were.

This one, he seemed more fascinated than anything. He looked at you like you were a wonder and maybe that was the worst. You wished you could scare him. You wished you could taste his blood to have these humans taste their own medicine. You wished you could drown him in the chlorine of your poor excuse of a bathtub. You wished he stopped looking at you like that.

Because you didn’t know what to do with that.

Somewhere further down the hall of the basement a door opened and closed.

The boy with honey brown hair and doe eyes snapped out of his stupor and quickly stood up, looking around. He looked at the broken pieces of glass on the ground, quickly swept them under the sink with his shoes before looking down at you. His eyes were full of something you couldn’t name. You didn’t see this look on any human before him. It made you hate him even more.

The boy didn’t come back again after that. Not alone at least.

There were footsteps of four people. You could tell with your eyes closed. One of them was the bearded older man who ordered everybody around. He always talked about you like you were his trophy in a fatherly tone yet he treated you like a ragdoll. His voice alone made you want to tear his skin with your nails until he bled, preferably from his artery. 

“What you will see, Donghyun-ah, is strictly classified. You cannot tell anybody about this. It could be the discovery of the century. Our institute would be the first to…”

The man kept talking but you tuned out his voice. You became good at that: pretending not to feel, not to hurt. You kept your eyes strictly locked on at one point while the man whom the others referred to as senior doctor touched your turquoise scale-covered fin. You kept your mouth in a firm line when he pressed down hard enough to hurt. You clenched your teeth, breathing through your nose, willing yourself not to move while he grabbed your hair roughly to push it aside, revealing the gills at your neck. You stayed still like a statue, your eyes straight on the boy and his eyes full of horror. You could hear his heartbeat pick up like whispers of the ocean in a shell but you couldn’t tell whether it was from anger or dread, fear or something else. You kept eye contact nevertheless because you wanted him to see it: that you weren’t afraid, that you weren’t there to humor them. You were a survivor, a force of nature, you were the ocean itself and you would have your vengeance one day.

It hurt. Breathing.

The scales on your chest, just above your breasts were still healing from the metal digging into your skin where it was the softest. At weak moments like this, you just wanted to sleep, sleep forever. Become one with the water and the stars.

Sounds of approaching steps alerted you and you braced yourself for one more round of unwelcomed sterile touches and pain. You didn’t let your guards down even when it was the boy with the soft eyes. He might not have been the one cutting and pulling out scales from your skin one by one but he could as well have been. One day he would be.

He approached you slowly but not out of fear. He moved deliberately as if he didn’t want to scare you. He had a cloth in one hand and a bottle of water in the other. You eyed him warily as he sat down at the edge of the tub.

“I’m going to pour it on you. It might be cold,” he whispered and something deep inside you wanted to snort because this boy clearly had no idea how cold the deepest parts of the ocean were. But you kept silent, gritting your teeth, mentally preparing yourself for the burn, for a trick, for anything other than ease for the pain.

But then the water touched your skin, familiar and ocean-scented, dribbling down from your shoulders across the valley of your chest to your turquoise scaled tail and you felt a little bit more alive. You felt like you could finally breathe and your scales shone just a bit brighter and the angry red scars faded. You didn’t intend to let it show but your shoulders shrugged in relief. Maybe that gave the boy the courage or maybe he was reckless by nature but he moved closer.

“Your wrists,” he explained and before you could have protested, he lightly dabbed over the wet cloth along your metal-cut wrists tied to the not working tap, helping them heal too.

For the first time, it was you who studied him. The way he leaned over you to reach your arm. The concentration on his pretty face. The way his fringe fell over his honey eyes. He was beautiful in his fragile human way. Centuries ago he could have been a prince or a sailor you would have seduced into the waters.

He was so close you could hear his heartbeat clearly like the little chimes on fishing boats. Water was filling up your veins but you could still feel your hunger grow. It would have been so easy. He made himself an easy prey. It made you wonder whether it was just a ploy, whether they were testing you, whether he wanted something in exchange. He must have had some ulterior motives because humans were selfish creatures. Even if he wasn't, his death would have been a small price to pay for freedom.

You didn’t move even when the boy pulled slightly back to check on his work. Not when his gaze lowered to your face and your eyes met. He was so close you could feel his breath on your lips and you would have had to barely push yourself up to meet his. You imagined kissing him until all oxygen left his lungs, leaving his lips chapped and bloody.

You could have drowned him. Right there. In the water of his own body.

“Aren’t you afraid of me?”

You barely recognized your own voice. It had been so long since you had sung, even longer than you had spoken a human language. It surprised the boy too. His eyes widened and he blinked in confusion, but didn’t pull back.

“I could kill you now. I want to kill you,” you told him coldly because he was one of them and they deserved it.

The boy didn’t even flinch.

“Why aren’t you then?” He asked simply, so calm as if he knew no tidal wave came crashing.

“I don’t know,” you admitted because your only explanation was that he was an odd one. “Why are you helping me?”

You weren’t naive enough to expect the truth but you weren’t sure if a lie or pity was more humiliating.

“Nobody would deserve this,” came the answer as if he wasn’t one of the white coated people, as if he didn’t see you as a mere test subject.

“Not even a monster?” You asked with a tilt of your head because you had heard what they said about you, about your kind. You knew the tales mothers used to tell their sons about the beautiful, dangerous beasts of the sea in order to keep them from wandering around. You weren’t more of a monster than those men though. Not even with sharpened teeth and claws.

“You’re the farthest thing from one.” Doe Eyes spoke in the softest tone like he really believed what he was saying. Like he didn’t see your anatomy on a blueprint in those white walled operating rooms. Like he didn’t hear the rumors about you spilling the blood of his peers on capture day. Like the only thing keeping you back from tearing him apart wasn’t hanging on a loose thread.

So this time, you did snort.

“You have no idea.”

They starved you for two whole weeks. You could only keep track of days due to the unexpected daily visits and yet, they would have never guessed that your condition wasn’t worsening rapidly thanks to one of their own.

“I’m sorry,” the boy apologized in his honey voice after the sea water he brought healed the newest puncture wounds on your bare shoulder and you looked up at him in question, confused. “That I can’t do more.”

You couldn’t say you understood him. He was on neither side. He wasn’t with those men who just took and took and took nor was he brave enough to go against them and let you go. He was neither good nor bad yet he was doing more for you than anybody had ever done. You weren’t used to kindness like this, neither from humans, nor from your own kind, so you were wary of him and his apologies. If you had been meaner though, you would have told him that it wasn’t that he couldn’t, it was that he didn’t want to. But you weren’t the type to bite the hand that fed you. And who were you to blame him for his selfishness when you were the same? You both just wanted to survive in a harsh world.

His name was Donghyun, you finally remembered. It burned into your brain cells as clear as the scalper’s cut was into your tender skin when they forced the surgical tool into his trembling hands.

You saw the tears pooling in his eyes and you really didn’t understand why he was crying. You were used to the pain. You were used to being hurt.

Maybe he wasn’t used to being the one to do the hurting but his hands were at least kinder than anybody else’s.

Donghyun sat on the edge of your bathtub when you awoke. The first thing you noticed was that his hands were still shaking. The second was that one of his cheeks reddened in the form of a palm and something heavy and angry pressed down on your chest seeing him hurt.

Comfort didn’t come naturally to you, it wasn’t in your nature yet looking at him then you wished it was. You wanted to reach out to touch, to hold, which was so unlike you catching yourself doing so hit you like a heavy wave. For once, you were relieved that the chains held you back and you couldn’t move. It would have been a mistake to start caring now.

Yet, you started humming an old sea melody, the rhythm of waves washing up the shore on beautiful, calm mornings to fill the silence. It wasn’t enchanted like your singing but this was the most you could do. It wasn’t comfort, it wasn’t care, just to fill the silence, you told yourself.

Still, Donghyun looked at you in awe, his gaze mellow like you were a miracle and not just something broken. It somehow made you feel worse. He wasn’t supposed to look at you like that. Not without glamour.

The next day you carved four lines like a sculptor into the doctor’s old face. His blood was still under your nails when they dumped you in the damp metal cage with no water at all as a punishment. Your tail laid uselessly on the ground and your scales felt heavy on your body. Like this you really felt like a fish out of the water.

Time went differently without having Donghyun around. You didn't even notice how much you got used to his presence until you started missing it. You replayed his voice, gentle and deep, imagined his eyes on you, kind and free of judgement, naive, over and over again.

“Do you miss it? The ocean?” Donghyun had once asked.

It had been a stupid question. It was like asking if you were missing the oxygen but you answered nevertheless. If he wanted to make small talk so bad, you might let it just to hear his voice.

“Every breath.”

“How is it? Tell me about it,” he had prompted softly and you soon learned that he was fascinated by everything you told him about your home, a safe haven and a doom all the same. You had thousands of stories about how vicious the sea could be, how cold and unforgiving, but just as much about its beauty and Donghyun drank them all in. When he told you about the time he learned to swim or when he saved a turtle, you realized: he was nothing like the other white coated men who just wanted to take and take from the waters until they could. Until they drained it from its wonders… and horrors, like you. Donghyun was different, he just wanted to observe and understand. Not that you needed or wanted his sympathy. Or so you told yourself.

When Donghyun held your hand for the first time, you thought you were dreaming. It didn’t seem real. His touch was feather-like, butterfly wing touches against your dry skin. He was so careful as if you could crumble just from his fingertips.

“Hey.”

When you heard his voice, you wondered whether your mind was playing games with you. Whether the lack of water was starting to drive you to insanity finally.

You opened your tired eyes slowly and in the dimly lit basement room, Donghyun’s elegant features came out a little hazy. Or were you dizzy just from the thirst?

“I’m getting you out,” the boy said so confidently as if it was the easiest thing to do. If it wasn’t too exhausting to move an inch of muscle you would have laughed at him. Without the sea, you were nothing. You were less than a pretty shell.

In that state of yours, barely conscious, you couldn’t tell how he managed it: how he got you into a wheelchair or where he got the key to your chains or the card that opened every door but the next thing you knew was rain and wind hitting you in the face, sand and sea on the horizon. The salty air made breathing easier.

It was a typhoon, you could tell. It was the sky’s wraith and oh there was a reason why storms were named after women.

You were halfway down the beach right next to the research institute when the white coated monsters noticed your absence amid the chaos the typhoon caused.

“Stop! Kim Donghyun, don’t you dare!” The doctor’s voice boomed like thunder then it was followed by bitter disappointment when Donghyun didn’t even falter. “I knew she put you under her spell, you stupid child.”

Two long sentences full of curses later the ocean welcomed you in her waves like a benevolent mother welcoming her ungrateful child back in her embrace.

It was like food for the starving, like a drug for an addict in rehab. Being back in the waters made you feel a heady kind of powerful, like you could do anything. You could feel the waves coming, you could taste the salt on your chapped lips, you could feel the hunger and anger come back in full force. You could have just left. Now being able to swim freely without chains, without anybody holding you back, you could have just headed towards the deepest part of the ocean and never look back but you didn’t even think about leaving like that. Not when you could finally sing.

You will drown them all, you thought, a little wicked, because wasn’t it cosmic justice? Letting the sea take them after they had taken you from your motherland?

You could feel the enchantment building up around you, its sound was carried through waves and thunder, the storm helping you make a symphony. Surrounded by the water and its fury you felt power surge through your veins and just like that your siren song filled the air. It really was a bit like a spell, just as much you were a sea witch.

You watched with a content smile as the old senior doctor and all his followers struggled to get to you in the water, getting deeper and deeper. You let them drown one by one as they couldn’t keep up with the storm brewing and the heavy waves took them under. You didn’t pay much attention to most of them, your focus was on your main torturer, the old man, the doctor. You swam up to him with a sweet smile watching his face morph into a blissful grin at your closeness, then you grabbed him by the collar and dragged him underwater. You pierced your sharpened teeth through his wrinkly skin and bled him out like it was poison. You wanted him to suffer like he had done to you. Like they deserved.

Vengeance never tasted so sweet.

It was like waking up from a long slumber when you came to consciousness. Rage and adrenaline had left your body by then, leaving you exhausted in the calm after the storm. The beach was left in ruins all around and that was when you realized that something was wrong. Something was missing. Or rather, somebody.

Donghyun.

In your haste and delirious state, you forgot that even though he helped you, he was human too. That if he stayed close, he was just as affected by your song as all those sailors over the years. Him of all people, the only one who thought you weren’t a monster.

“No,” you whimpered when the realization hit you. “No, please.”

Frantically you looked around, swimming towards the part of the beach where the wheelchair was left, broken. That’s where you found him, near the rocks, lying in the sand, unconscious. Even as you got closer, you couldn’t hear his heartbeat and it was your fault.

You crawled over the sand, right to his side. Even in this state, soaked and pale, sand sticking to his skin and hair, he looked like an angel. But he had water in his lungs and a barely beating heart.

You could have left him there and nobody would have batted an eye, nobody would have even known that you killed one more but the thing was: your kind might have been selfish but you were loyal too. He had saved your life, so now you owed him.

“Come back,” you whispered as you leaned over him, watching his pretty, calm features before pressing your lips to his, evaporating the water from his body just enough to let him breathe. When you pulled back, you could still feel the soft tingle of his lips on yours and you waited until a flutter of his eyelashes showed that he would awake. Then you slipped back into the sea, out of sight, as if you hadn’t even been there in the first place.

You watched from a distance as he was found by an elderly couple and he looked around confused. You watched as he was treated with the kind of care and kindness you could have never given him because you belonged to the cold deep ocean sea and he belonged to the warm soiled land. You had no future together, nothing but a fever dream fantasy.

And if he heard your humming at night when he walked on the beach, some would have called it haunting but some would have called it a confession.

Because you weren’t made for love but he was. He deserved it all and this was the most you could give him. The love of the ocean, untouchable but always present.

[herejusttosufferalong]

Hello, SEX anon again.

YOOOOOO, we have been fed so well these past few days. Isn't it?! I was getting a little peckish and A03 wasn't really filling me up. Slutty smirk. Then poof. Everything I ever dreamed about, on my plate. In my mouth. Blessed with fresh pics of N at Wimbledon. White last year, black this year. I see you, girl. That dark side coming out but your face like an angel. Ta-tas for days. Good for fkn you. Can confirm all previous statements.

Then before that we get BTS of an actual, irl wedding between L&N. I was fkn sobbing uncontrollably. Look at her cute cherub face, talking about shitting herself, placing her hand on his god damn heart. Are you trying to fck with me? You are the realest person I've ever seen in my life, I love you and if I met you my eyes would pop out and I would die peacefully having breathed the breath that you breathed in my vicinity. Thank you, I love you.

Then there's that goofy L. Jaw on the floor. Eyes bulging. Drinking her all up. Breathing her in Hocus Pocus style. Being all David Brent when startled by the cameraman. Yeah, guy, you're being filmed. This is a set. GUY. LOOK at me. We're filming. HELLO? Nup, gone. And them just having those glazed over eyes, just emotionally spent, just overcome, just in love, but not aware or maybe are aware, but I like the way you feel physically, and you look perfect, and you smell nice, and I cannot stop looking at your lips and eyes and your lips, and oh bohy. It must be fkn draining. It must be so hard to get married and pretend it's fake. I imagine that would be so challenging, but you know, they the pros.

Full disclosure, I wasn't present when this gift came to light. I was minding my own business, getting slightly high with my partner (medical, of course), thinking of ways to confess my love of Lukola and get his ADHD male POV. That sweet anon with toddlers inspired me to come clean. But it didn't go so well initially, because I was all slowed down, and laughing nervously, and saying shit like "I need to tell you something... please don't judge me... oh god". He looked like L when some man touch N. So yeah, I wouldn't recommend. But it all turned out just fine. What would've taken 10 mins took about 2 hours to explain. Tangents upon tangents of Brazil and security guards and Rory and the forehead stroke. But we got there. Ngl, we analysed hard. Every position. It was hot af. Some insights:

After two seconds watching L&N interview - "that guy is lost, he clearly wants her though... got some self-confidence issues... giving me Karl Pilkington vibes... she's like his carer". Fkn lol. Me being like N defending L "but like he's a nice guy, like a sweet sensitive guy". "Yeah he seems like it but he's clearly out of her league...". Me holding onto Lukola delulu so hard, "I know but he could get to her level, don't you think?". Please for the love of god. "Yeah but it's all down to him. He's the problem". YEP WE KNOW.

L is a "leaf in the wind" blowing everywhere, no foundation in himself, that's why his behaviour is so confusing. L is not aware of his feelings on a conscious level or not fully accepting it. Flirty behaviour followed by odd looks explained by liking her touch and closeness but not wanting others to know he likes it. Thinks they caught feelings on set. Didn't go ahead because of filming and being 'in character'. Reunited after filming, cue pics of them together, and lots of chatter about them being together irl. Thinks that L's friendship group may have joked about it, gave him shit for it, and L buried those feelings deep. May have been getting thirst messages after 'glow up', pumped up by fuck boy mates, ego takes over. Opts for friend-approved doll. Feelings came up again during press tour when separated from friends. May have acted impulsively on said feelings - Brazil possibly. Possibly shut down by N due to timing and messy third parties. Back to London and influences. Lost again.

My desperate question, "Will he find his way back? To self-actualisation???" "It would be hard for someone like him to find his true self when surrounded by those people". Me still hopeful, "Oh but he'll probably be away from them when they start s4 filming". Him being logical af. "Could be a good opportunity... I can only see two ways of him changing... either he reaches rock bottom and starts to wonder why he's so miserable, and even then maybe not... or someone he trusts and respects talks him round... but it's going to be really hard for him... he's asleep at the wheel". Ok, gotcha. Fck this is gonna be a slow process, guys.

But then again they already married so who gives a fck.

"But then again they already married so who gives a fck."

I FUCKIN LOVE YOU ANON

PLS SEND MORE 💜🥃

[gojos-thot-patrol]

This can be SFW or nsfw or both, whatever you fancy hehe, but can you do turn ons and turn offs for the jjk men? Plz and thnx o holy one ☝🏽

Oh reader, Don't call me Holy, I might just fuck around and start a cult ♥️

Now Presenting...

Starring Satoru Gojo, Suguru Geto, Nanami Kento, and Ryomen Sukuna

Satoru Gojo

You existing is his main turn on.

Jk.

…..But not really.

When girls with enough hair tie it up OR let it down? That's his drug.

When you let out a little giggle at his stupid jokes? Heroin 

That look you give him when he’s being actively dumb? It’s going to make him act up even more.

The look on your face when you're concentrating? Begs him to break that concentration.

Also just like…dominant people. 

Honestly I feel like Gojo is a little bit of a masochist, ngl. So like, little pats on the back that are just a bit too rough do it for him

Honestly, say anything with a little bit of bass in your voice and he’s hooked

Thigh highs, he fucking loves thigh high stockings.

Thighs in general really, thick thighs save lives

The little dimples at the base of your spine? Drive him fucking wild. 

And your moans are basically an aphrodisiac for him.

Blindfolds on him? Eh. On you? Next level. 

Edge him, please edge him, he’s begging

As for turn offs

Spit, blood, piss, bodily fluids of that nature, off the table.

I’m going to keep it real with you, I do think he’s at least a little turned off by condoms. He thinks his pullout game is that strong enough and he’s so touch starved, that when he does get to that point with you he wants zero barriers between you.

Feet. He hates them. Keep your grippers to yourself.

Suguru Geto

He is verrrryyy….musically motivated. 

Certain songs really get him going, and no it’s not what you're thinking. 

You’re thinkin’ Nonsense by Sabrina Carpenter, I’m talkin’ Animal by Nine Inch Nails

Concerts in general are a turn on for him. The energy goes straight to his dick.

He takes you to a concert and half way through he’s fucking you in the filthy ass bathroom

For similar reasons, you singing is a major turn on for him.

Also, when you stretch to try and reach something and your shirt rides up and he can see your tummy?

He’s going to go feral. 

Stripteases are also a major turn on for him. 

You begging him to fuck you is far better than opium as far as hes concerned. It scratches his corruption kink 

Honestly? This may be controversial but he loves it when you say you hate him.

Cause that just gives him a reason to show you why that's bullshit. 

Head is another major turn on for him, both giving and receiving he is ALL ABOUT IT

Also he’s into voyeurism. Look at him. 

Call him sir and watch him lose all control. 

Call him daddy and watch him walk away LMAO

Vore is a major MAJOR turn off for him. It reminds him of swallowing curses and makes him GAG

Honestly anything relating to the jujutsu sorcerers or work turns him off ngl

Actively trying to be sexy is another turn off for him. Like, just let it happen naturally and be in the flow. He thinks people trying to force “being sexy” (Like thirst traps for example) Are often stilted and awkward and maybe even a little funny?

Nanami Kento

Some of Nanamis turn ons include:

A stable income

A 401k

A retirement plan!

Nanami is the most turned on by STABILITY. 

Nanami is more than willing to take care of his partner, but he does want to feel like this is a partnership. 

Now, all jokes aside, Nanami is a man of taste. 

He finds hip dips intoxicating, and loves the spine line along your back.

The way you laugh is an aphrodisiac to him.

But, he's not all fluff. If we’re talking nsfw…

He loves a solid matching set. Lingerie in general really is a huge turn on for him.

If you’ve read my NSFW headcanons (See: Here) you know why 👀

Dirty talk is another turn on for him, as he uses it to get consistent consent from you

Call him daddy. Call him daddy, I dare you, watch him ACT UP

He also l o v e s  LOVES  to see you covered in marks. He’s all about it.

Now, As for his turn offs..

Nanami is big on smells. This isn’t even like a “Bad hygiene turns him off” because, yea fair. No, I mean things like, Coconut or pear smells actively turn him off. Buy the wrong shampoo and face the consequences.

Also, blood. I don’t see him as a period sex guy, his job is too bloody for him not to be turned off by it.

Forcing your voice to go up in pitch. AKA: The uwu voice. If that’s naturally how you talk, that's one thing, but putting on a voice is another. 

Call him Daddy in the UWU voice, that will really confuse him. 

Ryomen Sukuna

Ryomen is fucked up dude, I’m not gonna front LMAO

Lets start light before we get fucked up.

It turns him on when you need him. When you need him to get something off the top shelf or open a jar or whatever. That shit turns him up to 10 because he loves feeling like you’re dependent on him

It turns him on as well when you try to question his authority. He loves to see that feistiness in you...and also cause he knows that he’s about to get to punish you.

In kinda the same vein, it turns him on when he sees you being bad, but not defiant against him.

Like, if he catches you being particularly mean to one of the servants? That scratches his corruption kink, he’s gonna lose his shit.  

Now, on to the main event

Remember when I said blood was a turn off for Nanami? THE EXACT OPPOSITE FOR RYOMEN.

He will purposely bite you until you bleed.

In the same vein, crying. You crying activates the predator part of his brain and he loves it

He’s a sadist, there I said it.

He also loves watching your tits bounce when he’s fucking you, that shit will make him go feral.

He loves when you get cock drunk for him, seeing you desperate for him to fuck you strokes his ego in all of the best ways.

He’s got a praise kink, but he won't admit that.

This is about to be so vulgar…watching his cum drip out of your pussy makes him want to fuck you full again. Yep, take that line in

And like, if he ever knocks you up, god help you both cause his breeding kink will not let either of you rest.

Now, turn offs for him?

Honestly I see Ryomen as constantly horny so there's not many.

You flirting with someone else would be a turn off for him, but he’s also going to kill you for it.

Getting food involved in any way I feel like would be a major turn off for him, that's the  vibe I get.

If you tell him you love him in the middle of the act it might scare his boner away, ngl.

….that's it.

[shmowder]

Your blog is making me want to replay Patho 2 again... I did play once on the intended difficulty, and then I replayed it afterwards on the easiest settings, doing everything and saving everyone and I'm ngl, that was some of the most fun I've ever had even though it wasn't quite in the spirit of the game haha

The so-called spirit of the game is this senior citizen wirh an overgrown 2000s anime boy haircut who shakes his cane at you sassily when you choose to only swallow a handful of razors as opposed to the razor muckbang the game offers.

I finished the game on the hardest difficulty

This was my first time playing the game ever. I straight up went to the intended difficulty, saved everyone, did everything, and never starved for a single day. I had 20+ Shmowders by the end. I was fully stocked on meat, I was fully stocked on homemade antibiotics and maxed the hospital shift each day.

All of that with only 3 Deaths

WHERE IS MY FUCKING CELEBRATION HUH? WHERE IS MY MEDAL? NO ONE THEW ME A PARTY, NO ONE INVITED BELLA HADID >:( MARK WASN'T IMPRESSED.

Fuck you Mark! ONE OF THOSE DEATHS WAS BULLSHIT YOU DUMB SLUT. YOU SPAWNED A GUY ON TOP OF ME WHILE I WAS PICKING UP HERBS, HOW THE FUCK DID HE ONE SHOT ME WITH FULL HEALTH HUH? YOU WHORE.

What I'm saying is. Look, we both finished the game on complete opposite extremes, yet we're both here. In a pathologic x reader blog on tumblr. We both had fun and shared a good understanding of the plot and characters. That's what matters. Everything else is just people patting themselves on the shoulder. You're the only one who will be impressed with the fact you beat the game flawlessly, and you're the only one who will be bothered by the fact you picked an easier difficulty

Because it's really not that different. To me, I have the kind of autism that makes games like pathologic smoother than water for me, I thrived on the ruthlessness of dark soul and did a no death run in darkest dungeon. But also. I absolutely suck at casual games, I can't play Stardew Valley unless I'm fully cheating, I can't for the life of me beat a single platforming game because I have a slow reaction speed.

Play Pathologic however you want! Ice-pick Joe isn't gonna pop from under your bed at 3am to beat you up with hammers. This is coming from the most tryhard difficulty elitism person there is in games.

Buttttt. I do recommend giving Pathologic classic HD a try. I promise anyone who beat Pathologic 2 on ANY difficultly will cuck tf out of the first game. There is no thirst! The vendors have unlimited money, and you can sell all of your trash to them! THE ECONOMY IS THRIVING I BOUGHT FOOD ON THE DAYS THE PRICES WERE SKYROCKETING BC I COULD AFFORD IT. I would've never financially recovered from buying food in P2 on any day that's not the first one. In P1, I rarely slept because I was deepthroating lemons and snorting coffee beans day and night since I could easily afford the health/hunger penalty.

Meanwhile, in P2, I'd save coffee beans to sell to get enough money to save up for army clothes.

The combat is so forgiving, the houses with good loot aren't the infected ones like in P2 but the burned ones! The AI in that game is so stupid you can trick plague clouds into disappearing if you stand still! You can glitch and jump over fences to take shortcuts through the town! YOU CAN SCAM THAT CUNT ANDREY STAMATIN FOR ENDLESS SHOTGUNS.

Lastly don't forget that 90% of the Pathologic fandom haven't even played any of the games at all. 70% probably never watched a single playthrough either and just video essays instead.

In the steam version of Pathologic 2, Only 10% of players who bought the game have ever reached the end.

10% !!! That's us there! Me and You! It doesn't matter how what matters is that we both did it while 90% of people gave up.

And the situation in the classic game is even more dire tbh-

Only 6% ever opened the game and made it through the first day. Only 3% ever made it to the last day.

So, really good on you for finishing the game! Good on me for finishing the game! WE DID IT! YAY! Someone really should give Bella Hadid a call.

Also, please do yourself a favour and ignore whatever the video essayist says about the difficulty of the games. They're good storytellers for building an interesting narrative to watch, but they're not good at videogames assessment. Each of their reasons is very personalised by their own experience and doesn't necessarily mean other people will struggle with the same issues. Don't listen to anyone who tells you picking an easy difficulty ruins the game either, Pathologic doesn't relay on its brutal gameplay to shine, it can more stand on its own as a narrative story walking game. If anything, it would probably shine better on easier difficulties when you have time to dig for context clues and plot without starvation breathing down your neck. I missed some flavour text quests because I was too stressed about balancing different objectives to do them or pay attention when something important was said.

[olsenmyolsen]

Chapter Fifteen: Long Distance Calls

The Farmer's Daughter - (A WandaNat Story)

Masterlist . Tag list: @xenaizogie

Summary: Natasha talks to her best friend, Clint Barton, about life and Wanda.

Word Count: 2.1K

Content: Feelings, WLW, Panic Attacks, PTSD, Crying, Talks, Soft Wanda

Natasha woke up in the middle of the night disoriented and thirsty. Like she needed cold, refreshing water or she'd die type of thirst.

So, as Natasha rose and stumbled around in the dark with only the moonlight as her guide toward her mini fridge, she realized a few things.

One. She was still naked.

Two. Wanda was gone, along with her dirty clothes and towel.

Three. Freezing cold water had never tasted so good. But it still came in second to what Natasha had earlier. (Wanda)

Natasha took a deep breath after chugging her water and walked back to her bed. Collapsing onto it as her body was exhausted from the previous day's events. Yet, Natasha still reached over and grabbed her phone.

1:13 am.

She squinted as her phone's brightness blinded her before her eyes adjusted and turned it down. Natasha went to an app on her phone and turned on her smart bulb so she didn't have to get up.

While Natasha's body was tired, her mind was now alive, and she knew she wouldn't be getting sleep soon. So she decided to check what notifications she had missed.

Several were from Wanda.

Wanda😊

im texting you as you're passed out next to me in bed and omg Natasha you look so cute.

im ngl i took so many pictures of you

[picture] [picture] [picture]

i would set an alarm for you for later but idk your password. omg if you read this later just so you know I'm not asking for it i was just saying. Promise!!! 🫶

okay i was kinda hoping you'd wake up by now but you seemed exhausted so im just going to let you sleep. i have to get going dinner is soon and knowing my mother she'll want to do a whole thing because mr. quicksilver being back. so if you're not awake when i come back to grab your laundry i just want you to know that these last couple of hours we spent together were fucking enchanting Natasha... i love how you made me feel... we can talk more later 😘

that was me kissing your forehead in case that wasn't clear

Pietro asked me where I went I said with you to the creek! just so you know

Natasha stared at the words on her screen and read them again and again. It wasn't a dream. She and Wanda had spent the later afternoon tangled in one another.

Natasha covered her mouth and shifted in her bed with a giddy smile. She hadn't felt this way in so long... but as her mind replayed Wanda's touches, hips, thighs, and whispered sighs. She came back to her PTSD attack, and her smile slowly disappeared.

It had been four months since Natasha's last one, which forced her to let out a tired sigh. She opened her notes app and went to a specific tab. Natasha wrote yesterday's date in between the lined rows.

The above dates traced back to five years ago.

Natasha exited the app, and before she could doom scroll anymore or get trapped inside her mind, her phone started to buzz.

It was Clint Barton calling her.

Natasha answered the phone at a rapid pace. It had been weeks since she last spoke to him. Days since she last tried contacting him. She missed her friend. "Clint!" She exclaimed as the call finally connected.

"Natasha?" He answered, sounding confused in turn, making Natasha confused. "Clint?" She said as her eyebrows furrowed. "Natasha!" Clint responded.

To the outside world, this must've been the dumbest way to start a conversation.

But this was just Natasha and Clint.

"Yeah! Hey!" Natasha answered. "Where the hell are you!?" She could loudly hear a helicopter behind Clint as he did his best to move away from the noise. "Hey! Sorry, I didn't get back to you sooner!" Clint yelled back before he was far enough away. "Couldn't talk while en route to base. Plus, my phone got destroyed."

Natasha lightly laughed. "Of course." If memory serves her, this would be his sixth phone since she'd known him. Clint smiled on the other side of the call. He, too, missed Natasha's voice. In actuality, he missed having his best friend on base, but long-distance calls would have to do. "So, am I allowed to know where you're at?" Natasha asked.

"Afraid not. It's a hot zone. Shouldn't even be making calls, honestly." Clint looked around even though he wouldn't get into significant trouble.

Just a normal amount.

Natasha hummed. She had been in his shoes before. "Speaking of... what are you doing up Natasha?" Clint intrigued. "You called me!" Natasha answered as she raised a hand in a "is he joking" manner.

Clint laughed. "Natasha, I was calling to leave you a voicemail. To let you know I'm alive, but I also know you and your voice when you've just been woken up." Natasha rolled her eyes. "So what's up!?" Clint asked.

"Honestly..." Natasha shifted in her bed. "Before you called, I just woke up from a nap." The call went quiet. "A nap?" Clint questioned. "You, Natasha Romanoff, took a nap?" Natasha sighed loudly. "Yes! I took a nap!" Clint started laughing, hard. "I've really heard it all." He started chuckling again. "How in the world did you manage to be that relaxed? Or exhausted?"

"A mix of it all." She replied, and Clint could sense there was more to it. "Did something happen?" A sigh slipped through her lips before swallowing. "Earlier today, I had a PTSD attack."

"Did anyone get hurt?" Clint asked before letting an air of relief escape once Natasha said no. "Are you okay?" He then asked. Natasha nodded. "I'm okay."

Clint smiled slightly on the other end. "That's good. If you want to talk about it, we can."

Of course, Natasha knew this but didn't want to rehash anything right now. "Maybe some other time." Clint was sure that was going to be the response. He and Natasha were similar in that way. "Did you make a note of it?" Clint asked. Natasha lifted her eyes and found her military bag. Inside was a journal she used to write all her thoughts, experiences, and trauma in regard to her time in the military and post it—a method suggestion to her by Dr. Helen Cho.

Natasha sighed. She hadn't opened the journal in a long time. But Clint knew that. He just thought that bringing it up would be a friendly reminder for Natasha. "I didn't," Natasha said with her voice low. Clint hummed. "Give it a shot, Nat," Clint replied, making the redhead nod down the phone.

Clint cleared his throat. "Well, I guess I have to ask you about the rest of your life." He laughed. "What's been going on?"

Natasha bit her bottom lip and smiled. "Clint, a lot has happened since we last spoke."

_

"Wait, so let me get this straight you let your ass get kicked?" Natasha was done with this man. "No, I didn't. I let her win, and besides-"

"Natasha, I've seen you take down men twice your size."

"Barton!" Natasha wanted to move on to the vital part of this ongoing call! "I could've won, okay. Yes, I didn't! Can you please talk to me about anything else?"

Clint hummed before slowly nodding his head.

"Be honest with me, Nat." He said, treading slowly. Natasha nodded back into the phone. "Okay."

"You're head over heels for Wanda, aren't you." Natasha smiled, and Clint could hear it. "She's got you, Nat, doesn't she?"

Natasha laughed through her nose. "You have no idea. It's embarrassing, actually." Natasha, now dressed in an old shirt of Wanda's, said as she laid out on her bed gossiping. Clint laughed at that before clearing his throat. "I'm happy for you, Romanoff. You deserve it."

A watery smile grew on Natasha's bruised face. "Thanks, Clint."

"Hey, maybe you and she could visit Laura and the kids soon. She'll be needing help around the house." Natasha thought about it a little. It would be nice."I could talk to her about it sometime,"Natasha said vaguely, not to set a date into stone.

Clint understood. "Think about it. We're always here." Natasha rolled over on the bed before her phone vibrated in her hand, making her pull it away from her ear.

It was a text from Wanda: hey, your light is on. Are you okay??

"Natasha?" The redhead heard Clint's voice over the phone before she lifted it back to her ear."Yes! Sorry, Wanda texted me." She slapped her head. Natasha didn't need to overshare, but of course, she was doing it.

"Oh, okay, well, then I'll let you go," Clint said with some humor, making Natasha groan."You know it's not like that."She said. "I know," Clint said back. "I should be going anyway. Call Laura and the kids. I'll talk to you soon, Nat."

"I will. Be safe, Clint." Natasha said as she smiled down the phone before it went quiet—the words from Wanda reappearing in front of her. Natasha decided to get up from her bed and look out her window.

She saw Wanda's light on, but no Wanda.

"Yeah, I woke up a little bit ago, and then Clint called me, so I was just talking to him." Natasha wrote to Wanda.

She looked back up towards the window and saw a figure walk past the lacy curtains. Natasha couldn't help but let a smile grow.

Her phone buzzed: "Clint??" Natasha laughed hard at that, realizing she had not spoken to Wanda about who Clint was.

"My best friend from the military. Nothing to stress about. He's married and has kids."

Natasha waited for Wanda to read her message as she stood by her window, looking at the shadow walking back and forth in her room.

"so I'm not your best friend?? 🥺"

Natasha shook her head with laughter at Wanda's words. "We do more than what friends do." Natasha typed back and saw the figure move her lacy curtains open with a smirk.

Wanda waved, and Natasha waved back.

They were cute and stunned at the beauty of the other person. Wanda blinked and looked down at her phone. Natasha waited.

"...truee so then what does that make us?"

Natasha looked back towards Wanda only to see the brunette missing. Natasha lightly cursed as she wasn't sure what to say. She was fairly certain she knew what she and Wanda wanted, but what if she was wrong?

Natasha didn't want to make the sole decision.

"What do you want it to be?" Natasha typed and waited for her message to change from delivered to read, but it didn't.

Instead, a knock came to her door, scaring the shit out of her.

She flung it open and was glad it was who she thought. "Wanda!" Natasha grabbed the girl's arm and pulled her inside. Leaving the night sky outside as the door closed.

"I want it to be what you want!" Wanda cut off whatever Natasha was going to say as she found herself rocking back and forth on her feet. Natasha looked towards Wanda and placed her hands on Wanda's covered hips. "And if I say I want us to take it slow?"

Wanda ripped her eyes from Natasha's lips to the greens off her eyes. "Then it'll be slow." Natasha kept her reaction to a minimum. "Exclusive but no labels yet...?" Natasha asked gently of Wanda.

Wanda nodded and spoke confidently. "I don't want you seeing anyone else." She laughed through her nose. Natasha smiled and couldn't help it when she pressed her body and lips against Wanda.

"Me too," Natasha said as she breathed. "Besides..." Wanda began to tease. "Kinda got to take me on a few dates before labels can be thrown around." Natasha raised an eyebrow. "Is that right?" She tilted her head and slowly backed Wanda to the bed as the younger woman smiled with glee and nodded.

"Let's do something Wednesday night? I'll plan it." Natasha declared to Wanda as she pushed her onto the bed.

Wanda loved it, but why did she have to wait days for the date?

"Why then?" She asked just as Natasha hovered over her body. Natasha smiled. She was smooth and knew it. "Because if I'm going to show you off, my face needs to be more healed than it is now, Detka." Wanda mulled at the pet name and lifted her head up to kiss Natasha deeply. 

Natasha melted before Wanda pulled herself away. "It's a date."

"It's a date," Natasha repeated. Before she knew it, Wanda played coy and slid out from under her. "I'll see you in the morning, Natasha." Natasha didn't want her to go, but it's not like Wanda could stay without everyone knowing. But as she opened the door to leave, Wanda glanced towards the window facing her room.

"Keep the curtains open. I'll do the same."

Natasha looked from her window to Wanda and back. "Okay." She nodded along. Wanda grew warm in her cheeks. "Night, Natasha."

Natasha's soft eyes found Wanda again.

"Good night, Wanda."

dividers by @/benkeibear

[hanasnx]

my thirsts for scott barringer are closed <3

i had a couple thirst messages for scott so i’ve compiled them here bcos i want to give them responses, but i didn’t wanna answer them indiv:

— via @xstarkillerx.

ngl donnie i gatekeep the shit out of your asks bcos theyre always so good. like id come into my box just to stare at this bcos oh my god. hooking his big long fingers in your mouth and making you look dumb and sound dumb bcos he makes you speak through it. "you look like a fish on a hook, you know that?" and you can only whine indignantly at him. if he wasn't mean to you, how could he justify making you feel good? fucking bars, donnie. fucking bars.

"your word is law" that's right baby that's the stuff right there. i do love the trope of a virgin who strays from her path of purity bcos a pretty boy set out to challenge it. scott talking about how her legs are "locked at the knee" when discussing her with his step sister.

maybe it's cos two girls were into scott at the same time in the show, he gives me poly vibes. a boy with two girlfriends simply because he couldn't decide between them quick enough for their liking, so they take the decision out of his hands in a less traditional sense. i wanna see him fuck the stepsister and the principle's daughter at the same time. make all three of them kiss at the same time :)

— via @st4rfckerz.

scott. you are such a window-enterer. i can see how his big hand covers your mouth because "shh, we gotta be quiet." rutting into you as you're folded over yourself. "daddy might chase me out with his twelve gauge. serves me right for touching his perfect daughter, huh?"

thank you, i appreciate it :) scott looks like he belongs with a short gf man he just loves bullying you. pushing you around and tugging at your hair. calling you his "little girl" and keeping both your hands pinned in just one of his 😵‍💫

[shalomniscient]

Hello, first I would like to say that I hope you and yours can stay safe and take care during the holidays and that you have a merry thanksgiving.

That said, I also come bearing a gift as yet another shameless thirst has stricken me and left me plagued with both wonderous and terrible mental images.

This may be something I make into a ficlet on here and ao3, but for now I bestow it upon you.

P.S. NSFW Ahead, let the SS Thirst set sail.

You recall the maid cafe idea I sent you?

Imagine that the chief decides to surprise some of the Sinner women by dressing up as a maid and taking care of them, namely imagine the reaction of Rahu and Shalom when they return from an assignment to be greeted by the Chief wearing a maid outfit and waiting for them.

Imagine she has made them their favorite meal, drawn them a bath, with the chief helping them bathe, and even gives them a massage to help them relax, that said massage includes a 'happy ending' that leaves them a puddle of contented warmth as the reader asks them if they want anything else, maybe something tight and hot and wet?

Or maybe they would prefer something thick and hard, maybe made of cold plastic or maybe it is made of warm and pulsating flesh and is already dripping from the tip?

Or maybe they are spent already, and just want to bask in the comforting warmth of the chief's body and lay together in the bed and cuddle?

Some, such as Rahu and Zoya, would be all to eager to take the opportunity and have some more fun, while I can imagine others like Shalom are already spent and while they may like to play more, they enjoy the idea of resting a bit more.

For those that want to sleep and cuddle, they find themselves either lifted off their feet, Shalom swooning as she is cradled against the Chief's body, and tucked into bed beside the chief, their head nestles against their chest with the heartbeat of their beloved echoing in their ears as the chief lovingly coos at them and strokes their hair till they relax and drift into slumber.

For those that want to keep going, the chief smiles at them and guides them to the bedroom, where they begin to undress until they have all of their clothes neatly arranged on the ground around them as they take a naked dogeza position as they tell the Sinners that 'This Chief is all yours, please use them till you are satisfied.'

If Shalom had not been tired after the massage, then this is the point where she goes full body red, just as Rahu and many others would I imagine.

After all is said and done, the Chief and the sinner sleep like it is described above, with both falling into a deep slumber.

As you can probably tell, I don't do ideas halfway lol.

That said, take care and stay safe.

hey hey back at it again !! and merry thanksgiving to you too my liege :)

once more, holy fucking shit ??? love love love the domestic/fluffier side of this, especially pampering the sinners when they get back from a long mission 🥺🥺🥺 shalom my darling my beloved ,,,, she would SO appreciate coming home to you. just, the fact that she has one is so special to her already. so many years spent as a tool to only go from one problem to another, never able to find somewhere to rest and take this burden off her shoulders—until now. until you. she doesn’t need any particularly grand gestures either, just waiting for her in the living room so she can fall into your arms at the end of the day is good enough for her. her home has always been you, anyway—she’d follow you to oblivion and back. AND RAHU 🥺🥺🥺 sometimes rahu wld take a massage over sex im ngl, being a bodyguard is hard work, much less a soldier for p*aradeisos. a nice, warm bath would be so heavenly to her that sometimes she straight up falls asleep in the tub LMAO she’ll give you lazy but sincere kisses in thanks before flopping into bed and wrapping her arms around you, ever so protective even in sleep. dgsgdhshdgksh in conclusion, the intimacy of domesticity with ptn women (might offer more brainrot about this down the line…………. who knows)

side note to be 100% honest w you the maid stuff is kinda secondary to me in that it’s cool but i’m kinda neutral about it lol ?? BUT ur brainrot is still fun to pick apart and expand on my liege and i appreciate ur asks nonetheless :) take care !!

[periprose]

The surge of people thirsting over Cooper Howard is so funny to me because like.. he's basically just the new mandalorian now. The women will always yearn for sci-fi cowboys❗️

LOL so true 🤠🤣 women are always here for rugged, morally ambiguous cowboy men in some post-modern setting. I bet it's because we all think we can either fix them or that they'll protect us 🙈

I miss the Mandalorian considering how good he was at capturing our hearts!! Maybe I'll write for him again (haven't been watching though lol)

(Ngl I feel this applies to Joel Miller and uhhh to a lesser extent Han solo 😍🥰)

[spinningbuster98]

Castlevania III Dracula's Curse Part 5: It's ok Alucard: we all gotta start somewhere!

And we’re back again! Only this time I’m taking a different route!

The game’s lower set of levels are its most atmospheric, truly great stuff that they manage out of the NES’ graphics and sound capabilities!

Unfortunately they are also the most questionable when it comes to their level design though that will mostly come into play in the next video...

In the meantime let’s all finally say hello to Alucard!

Yes, THAT Alucard

King of Pretty Boys, the Bishonen Prince, the Carrier of Boobs in the eyes of the Show

Alucard!

What? Don’t you recognize him?

Well...admittedly he does have slightly different hair...

I’m pretty sure that if you were to go back in time and tell fans in 1989 that this guy would later go on to become one of the most iconic video game characters and an object of incredible thirst for fangirls all over they’d look at you as if you’d just grown a second head

And I’m not just talking about his design either, gameplay wise Alucard here is...kinda lame ngl

He’s offensively the weakest of the bunch, attacking with his “Balls of Destruction”, which can be upgraded to shoot up to 3 at a time but they have pitiful power and weirdly limited range and can only equip 2 subweapons, like Grant

His main ability is turning into a bat, consuming 1 heart per second, in order to fly over obstacles. This is indeed useful don’t get me wrong but when you really think about it it’s not all that different from Grant’s ability to stick to walls. True Alucard’s flight is completely unrestrained but you can only use Alucard for the game’s lower route (well unless you’re playing on a new game plus after beating the regular game but that would also be hard mode so ehh), while you unlock Grant in the second stage and can take him through all of the game’s paths, making him more versatile overall I think

Yeah... so much for being the son of Lord Dracula, I guess this explains why he’d wait for strong warriors with whom to join in order to fight his father: he’s basically fodder on his own!

But don’t worry Alucard: we all have our growing pains! Your time will eventually come and you’ll finally be able to get back at everyone who mocked you back in 1989!

[jjsshit]

Are you implying Miguel has an only fans or did I misinterpret what your post/reblog about the spider society’s finances was trying to say?

HELPP- NOT THE ONLY FANS😭

But no, if i remember correctly- miguel is an ceo of the alchamex company and an brilliant scientist. Which its kinda big money if you think about it

in all honesty, felt like thats an lyla thing to do ngl- like she probably knows ppl are thirsting his ass and sets up an only fans acc just to see random pictures of miguel

Anyway, miguels rich and since hes some sort of an ceo/board of directors(?) on alchamex im sure he probably built or made all that stuff for the spidey society with along the help of Lyla

And his universe is setting on the future time, so it could be that also but ya know-

Im still trying to catch up the comics and stuff like that so i apologies if i get this wrong in advance

[sharpth1ng]

2/2

Stu sad watching horror movies and pining is great, definitely canon lmao. - yesss I have certain ones in mind I can see him doing this specifically to (Re-animator, My Bloody Valentine, The Prowler and Psycho were the ones that came to mind and I have specific reasons too lmao) I would love to know which ones you would imagine him watching in his sad boy mode too! Stu absolutely would buy multiple copies of that CD and he would give it to Billy as a gag gift on birthdays or holidays I reckon. the image of Billy smashing them with a hammer in an overly dramatic fashion and Stu thirsting but simultaneously bothering him even more like "There's plenty more where that came from" while pieces of plastic are flying everyfuckingwhere will not leave me alone.

SOMEHOW I FORGOT HIS DADS NAME IS HANK BAHAHAHAH GOD Billy would die. Such exquisite torture tbh. Artisanal. Bespoke. - IFKR it's perfect. Stu would never stop reminding him of it either like instead of referring to him as "your dad" or whatever he always says HANK.

Yo that’s so sweet Gah I’m legit so touched 🥰 my and my dumb lil fucked up fics thank you 🙏 you absolutely deserve it!😊 and thank youuu for blessing us with such awesome works.

Lmao and yeah Middle aged Billy absolutely destroying homophobes is my fav tbh. - saaame I love this so much for him! “You should be afraid of the gays because we’re fucking coming to get you.” YES God this is amazing and honestly so hot ngl Stu saying to the same victim "The bury the gays trope is over, now the gays are gonna bury everyone else!" (then Billy and Stu make out in front of said homophobic victim just to piss them off before they kill them together).

Thos are all great picks! And Stu would love reanimator. I think Halloween 1 is a big one, like its so obvious and they've seen it so many times but I think it was formative for them and I also think Stu had a great big crush on Micheal and parallels Billy to him a lot in a very romanticized way. Like he sees him as this quiet, unstoppable force who also has these fun silly moments occasionally and idk, I think he knows every line in the movie but still feels so tender watching it cause its just Billy for him.

Black Christmas is another- aside from the fact that I love the movie I think its one Billy liked a lot as well, like this slow building pace, the shooting style, and then the fact that it revolves around phone calls and everything. Like when Sid runs up into Stu's attic during the chase scene its set up like a reference to the movie up there and I can't imagine thats not because Billy and Stu were playing Black Christmas at some point.

Deep Red is another, It just strikes me as a Billy favourite and I think he gets really animated talking about his favourites, so Stu would have som really fond memories of that.

LMAO giving the CDs is a great touch, like theres shards of CD flying and Stu's like " aww babe you didn't have to make confetti, thats so sweet"

THE BURY YOUR GAYS TROPE LINE, YESSssss!

"this time the gays are going to bury you" would be such a good tagline for a movie someone give me a bunch of money so I can shoot a super gay slasher, thats the representation I need-

But yeah I do love a violently out Billy, (awww baby boy look how far you've come)

[humanpurposes]

🍎🍋🍍🍇🍊🍑🫐

oh HIIII (jfc why did you pick so many??)

fruity ask game if you wanna send an ask 🤠

🍎 Is there anything you straight-up won’t write?

Underage characters/actors, pure fluff, rpf, a/b/o dynamics, and there are a few kinks I don't wanna go near (don't wanna type it out lmao but it involves a specific bodily fluid). Outside of that I'm kinda down for anything.

🍋 What’s your favorite spicier trope to write?

No point in being shy I guess... to write? Obsessive/possessive vibes, hate sex, enemies to lovers, praising/degrading, anything emotionally charged, and tend to I focus on hands a lot. Also breeding and spit kinks.

🍍 What kind of AUs do you like? Are there any AUs you hate or just generally have beef with?

Modern AUs own my soul!! It's so cool to see how writers adapt into the modern setting. I also really love @valeskafics's film and TV AUs they're so fun to read, especially Scream for Me. ALSO I'm obsessed with cottagecore!Aemond thanks to @babygirlyofthevale's Simple Pleasures.

I don't really have beef with them but soulmate AUs irk me idk why, they just don't make sense to me.

🍇 Is there a particular scene/episode/book/etc that you want to just write a million fics about, over and over? Which one?

Not really? I don't like being too repetitive in my writing because then I'm like well what's the point?

🍊 Who’s a character you don’t write for that often, but keep meaning to write for more? (They’re so interesting! But maybe you have trouble pinning them down, or keep getting distracted by another blorbo…)

I keep saying I want to writing something for Daemon and Aegon, just haven't gotten round to it. And I've thought about writing for Tom Bennett but I can't think of anything interesting enough. But I do really wanna write something with Alicent x Rhaenyra! There's a criminal lack of wlw fics on my masterlist I need to fix that.

🍑 If you could make a connection between your favorite character and another work you care about (whether a crossover/fusion or a wonderfully “pretentious” literary reference) what would it be? How would it work?

I love a good reference ngl. There's this one quote from Wuthering Heights I love: "I know that ghosts have wandered on earth. Be with me always-take any form- drive me mad! Only do not leave me in this abyss where I can not find you!" Like that's so Aemond obsessing over Lucerra's 'death' in Karma is a God.

If we're talking crossovers, I feel like Aemond, Loki and Dream would be the ultimately sad boi trio. I can see them hanging out, complaining about their siblings, listening to Lana Del Rey and roasting met gala looks. (Aemond and Loki showing off their knife skills and Dream's just like "but sand.")

🫐 What’s your favorite underrated thing in your fandom? (A ship that only you seem to write for, a character there’s almost no fics about, a trope that criminally hasn’t been written yet, etc.)

I want more dark!Aemond fics, like let this guy be mean I love him. And more Rhaenyra x Alicent fics. And more Otto thirst.

[lover-of-mine]

hahahah did you mute him on insta bc of his thirst traps?? ngl that’s relatable 😂 i will send a pt2

I did lspakapalapkapala. I muted both Ryan and Oliver, Ryan over the boxing videos and Oliver after the second set of black and white portraits, I think I fully unfollowed Oliver in a panic but I wanted to know how the rescue dog saga was going so I remembered to check again, Ryan I just forgot to check back lol

[corgoship]

Rating the Breaking Bad cold opens (season 1):

1. Pilot - is there anything to say that hasn't been said already. The scenery. The physically impossible placement of the pants in the sky. The pure chaos inside the RV. Bryan Cranston thirst trap. The tighty whities. "This is not an admission of guilt". The suspense as to what the fuck is going on and how we got there in the first place. Hook, line and sinker! 10/10

2. The cat's in the bag - this one is long. It starts out slow, but then we jump into the 'present' and get iconic moments such as "man not my HOUSEEEE". The "oh shit" moment at the end is great too. Just doesn't feel much like a cold open to me. 6/10

3. And the bag's in the river - very haunting but also very intriguing. The flashback and the discussion of what makes a human makes you think... but it's also kinda dumb ngl like those percentages aren't exact lol. I'm not one for gore but I'll allow it. Love how it ties into the current situation. 8/10

4. Cancer man - Operation Icebreaker! What knocks this one down is that it doesn't really feel like a cold open to me either? Like sure, it's plot relevant, but it doesn't set up much. The ending is absolutely hilarious though so that brings it back up. 5/10

5. Gray matter - this one is also a little long but it gets bonus points for cute Jesse in a suit and the introduction of Badger. 7/10

6. Crazy handful of nothin' - this one is pretty awesome. The present mixed with the glimpses of the future leave you wondering, once again, what the fuck is Walt up to. Gotta love the irony to his words too, and the wrecked RV. 9/10

7. A no-rough-style-type deal - ok maybe hot take but i think it's very funny that Walt gets turned on by criminal activities. Brilliant irony in the school meeting but... name a single person who wanted to see that sex scene. I'll wait. 6/10

[shoheiakagi]

Unpopular Opinions of Shouhei

so i ended up rambling and added some headcanons cause why not? more under the cut:

Send me shit!

i like romantic! banshou to some extent, but theyre far from my otp. idk, i just dont really feel them in that way. i feel like shouhei/eric and bandou/chitose have better potential, despite not having much screentime together

when there used to be some blogs that would headcanon him to be gay just bc idk he wasnt seen thirsting over any girl like bandou and chitose lol. at the end of the day ppl are entitled to their headcanons bc this is a fictional character we're talking about, but idk i remember those blogs being fully convinced that he was gay just for that reason and it rubbed me the wrong way cause wow when was the last time you went outside and interacted with ppl

i do think looks matter to some degree for him when it comes to relationships and/or hook ups. i dont think hes as shallow as chitose, and i dont think looks would be a major deal breaker for a relationship, but i see him as someone who takes care of his own appearance, so of course he would also want someone who takes care of their appearance as well

when ppl make him to be this 100% nice and sunshine character -_- like, granted hes a very minor character with little depth, but i dont like it when ppl reduce him to that one character trait. especially when the manga and anime shows that hes very impulsive, impatient, a little selfish at first, can be a little skeptical at times, and was not hesitant to terrorize a high school with the rest of the gang. his character sheet even stated that he dropped out of high school bc he hung out with the wrong crowd, unlike some of the other members who actually did graduate from high school.

okay but let me just gloat a little about how a couple of my headcanons about him ended up being true! i remember making this post about shouhei probably being in a gang or the wrong crowd before he joined homra cause from the get go, he had his left ear pierced (which is apparently frowned upon in Japanese society and is associated with thugs and shit) and owned a motorcycle, only to be proven right years later when his character sheet stated that he dropped out of high school and hung out with the wrong crowd! shouhei being the more romantic one out of homra? his poeback chapter showed him holding the reader's hand while she was cupping his face, him blushing at her, him shoving chitose away when he tried to flirt with the reader, etc. shouhei being into girls more on the sweet and girly side? that one nickname audio drama where him, bandou, and yata were making up scenarios on how homra would be like now that anna was their king, and he had this idea that anna would be this sweet, delicate princess surrounded by the protective homra knights who are also fighting for her attention. although ngl i didnt like the part about the boys fighting for anna cause shes a minor and like their little sister (daughter, in kusanagi's case), so i wish k would stop pulling that shit (the amount of times chitose would be making some sort of suggestive comment about her)

while he would never cheat and would never want his partner to cheat on him, he has no problem being someone else's side dude

he's a little more possessive and territorial than he lets on. he would probably be the type who needs to set personal boundaries with his friends when he gets into a relationship, and not understand if his s/o gets jealous, but once he sees his s/o getting hit on by someone else?? oh its a wrap

[achoshistor]

tonser

i'm gonna take to writing here bc i literally have toooo many people on my ig close friends and lowkey nobody gaf so i cannot go on a public tweakout. i want to preface this by saying yeah i thought he was just like 3hollis at first but listening closer (and pondering a little more) he really has a distinctly different sound they just use the same instrumentos or something. like yeah sure i can put them into category of dudes on the west coast who want to be final fantasy (2hollis is lowkey how i ended up in that mess ngl and now everything looks like final fantasy to me but that will be in a seperate post) but tonser sounds one million more times european and evil geometry dash. i dunno what it is but hes just got that european dota darude sandstorme feel to his music while 2holly sounds like skillrex if he was more jovial and not republican. anyways i think this specific genere of music has big potential in the future bc you hear people talking about "omg recession music is back!!" but tell me u remember all of the evil party and scene music back then. 6arely human or odetari are simply the predecessors... theyre big right neow imo because that style is popular but i think evil geometry dash will take over the scene revival in due time—like even going back to that ff thing (this is WORSE than brainrot...) that specific aesthetic is becoming popular: death note, fatal frame, people thirsting over that man from devil may cry (Dante?? Leon?? i forgot his name and the game he came from tbh but u know what i mean) like i think its gonna go very much mainstream soon and then we will see ppl calling others posers (well YOU never had thumb cramps from playing too much ffviir...) much in the vein of tarayummy&co being called posers and lowkey as much as i dont like that specific set of influencers they do embody the aesthetic cause what else do they do but make money off of partying?

anyways this was really meant to be a post about tonser bc i was listening to his music while studying (procrastinating on my spanish sorry if some cognates autocorrect into spanish lol i have my thingy set to bilingual). i think the youtube recommendations prophecy will come true soon for him. every time i get notes on my post im like are people actually reading this like i cant believe people like my rambles lol i wish i could be more articulate right now but im soooo sleepy omg i nearly fell asleep in class 2day... i think final thoughts i wish this guy luck and i think he really does have the potential to make it big. matter of time before tiktok picks this up or he opens for a more popular artist and he is propelled to stardom