#ngl im enjoying this more than i thought i would
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(Late) WIP Wednesday
Hi everyone! I was tagged by the lovely roop (@firenati0n) to share a wip so here's another snippet from the junora sickfic:
Nora had seen this coming. Her data-analyzing skills might’ve helped her out, but even without them, she could tell that June was going to catch the flu. It had been obvious, really. June had been grumpy and gloomy all afternoon, while constantly massaging her sinuses. When Nora asked her if she was alright, she simply said, ”I’m fine Nor, don’t worry about me.” Now, as she was sleeping on their shared bunk bed, burning up with a fever, Nora knew June wasn’t going to be ‘fine’ in a while.
Open tagging everyone with a wip to share!
#shbkabbcbnsnb#writing is fun#ngl im enjoying this more than i thought i would#junora my beloved#i love sickfics#nora you're so smart#first fic#wip#nora holleran#its actually late thursday here#anyways#bluergh#mildly terrfied of putting this out there buuuuuuut#im gonna be brave#and do it anyways
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not me immediately getting jude from this
who did you guys get? 👀
#idk any of them i just see jude around a lot so it made me chuckle#@/judejazza and their wonderful posts i often run into#victor is apparently my opposite from these options and elbert is my 2nd choice or smth#(friends and i usually do 'quizzes' 3x to get our main/secondary/opposite)#anyway im just snooping around now. still not sure how i feel abt it but was never too tempted for ikevil.#the less gacha in my life atp the better ngl ;;;;;;;; its why ive stayed away from most of the new games and tryna limit current ones#though if they ever do finally drop ikegen (unlikely asf) ..... count my ass in#i can't even be mad ikepri dropped bc ive enjoyed it so much more than i ever thought i would. easily my fav or 2nd fav bc ikerev#i still adore ikerev and magic and the world building and everything.. alice is just pretty dumb sometimes#which is why i adore b&tb-esque belle/emma so much. also why i like mai in some routes (ikesen humor op)#ikevamp has always just kinda been there tbh. usually the events feel more interesting than the routes ngl;;; charas are fun tho#anyway let's see how this bad boy goes#who did y'all get??#ikevil#ikemen villains#my post 📫#aerin.jpg#from the official ig acct btw
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Okay like i know they have to build up how haymitch knows all these people but it really feels like sunrise on the reaping just keeps pulling random characters from thg out of nowhere
#sunrise on the reaping#sunrise on the reaping spoilers#hunger games#i still love thg#im enjoying getting back into reading#i think ill re read eragon and get the new book#i neglected to buy it when it came out fhsbshsshsh#i dont have much extra spending money now. i only justified buying this book bc i had a $15 credit on amazon#i just got to where they introduce effie and im like#I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN#i had to close the book for a min#ngl i thought the same thing about tigris being snows cousin#ALSO I THOUGHT THAT WOULD BE HER CHANGED NAME NOT HER REAL NAME SHE WAS BORN WITH#also i always thought the character in the books was more of a drag queen than a cis woman
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If you have more ideas what should be added to the pole send an anon or a message and I’ll add it to the next one
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The Chosen One : ̗̀➛ Charles LeClerc
summary: as part of the f1 media team you get to meet a lot of the drivers, however there’s one driver who seems to take an extra special liking to you
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
liked by lancestroll, carlossainz55 and 79,302 others
ynusername: another fun week at the paddock, look out for some AM content coming your way on race day 🏎️💚
13,382 comments
username1: we love new yn content!! 🫶🏻
lancestroll: thank you for being the perfect partner to have with us this weekend!
ynusername: @/lancestroll it was awesome to spend some time with you 💚
carlossainz55: excuse me come and film some ferrari content asap
username2: cannot wait, i've been dying to see you in the aston martin garage 🤩
username3: now this i just know is going to be hilarious
lewishamilton: you're such a traitor...last week you were all over mercedes 🙄
username4: i always thought that green was your colour yn hahah
danielricciardo: it's been too long, come back and film with me kiddo 😭
ynusername: @/danielricciardo gimme a time and a date and i'm there
username5: the queen is back 👑
charles_leclerc: still waiting for you to hurry up and come and visit ferrari
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc blame my bosses not me
username6: everyone spam f1 until they let yn and go and film with c2 pls
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liked by leclercgirl101, ferrarifan7 and 1,482 others
f1content: rumours continue to swirl as charles and yn are spotted enjoying their downtime together in the miami heat ☀️
796 comments
username7: if this is true i swear i'll throw a party and everyone is invited 🙏🏻
username8: surely i can't be the only one thinking they look so well suited together
username9: is this why yn's been avoiding the ferrari garage??? 🤔
username10: two people do not colour coordinate for no reason fyi
username11: peep how comfortable they look to be together 🥺
username12: i refuse to accept that these two gorgeous humans are not dating
username13: yn is the only person i will give charles up for ngl 😂
username14: it's about time yn found happiness...praying charles is the man
username15: yn isn't even working this weekend and she's there, charles must be hella important to do that 🥺
username16: if this isn't true prepare for the sound of my heart breaking
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liked by pierregasly, estebanocon and 89,301 others
ynusername: another week = another garage. thanks to alpine for a great couple of days 🥺
13,694 comments
username17: my favourite creator and my favourite team, thank you f1 gods 🙏🏻
landonorris: fuming!! remember when you told me mclaren was your favourite team
estebanocon: don't think i've laughed like that for a long time, you're the best!! 😂
ynusername: @/estebanocon all thanks to the talented driver who joined me
georgerussell63: i swear these days you're more popular online then the actual drivers
username18: another week of impatiently waiting for yn to film with ferrari 🙄
charles_leclerc: EXCUSE ME WHAT ABOUT ME!?!? 🤯
username19: poor charles is gonna have a breakdown if yn doesn't appear soon
pierregasly: can't believe you refused to take the alpine shirt that i gave you 🙂↔️
ynusername: @/pierregasly do you know how many drivers would never speak to me again if i accepted???
username20: i wish the drivers adored me as much as they adore yn ngl
lancestroll: heartbroken that you've already left aston martin for the opposition
username21: how can one person be wanted by so many teams??
carlossainz55: i'll give you a million dollars to come and save my teammate 😂
username22: not charles being publicly thirsty for yn omg
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liked by charles_leclerc, olliebearman and 89,492 others
ynusername: apparently this is the only garage im allowed in these days 🤷🏻♀️
21,706 comments
username23: according to who yn wtf??? please tell me this is charles' doing 🙏🏻
carlossainz55: i always thought that red was your colour anyway
oscarpiastri: btw papaya definitely looks better than that!! 🧡
lancestroll: no way, green is definitely more your style yn! 💚
maxverstappen1: excuse me no one can compete with yn in navy blue thank you 💙
username24: not all the boys fighting over yn like she belongs to any of them
username25: clearly no one has ever seen yn in baby pink *chefs kiss* 🩷
charles_leclerc: it's about time you finally listened to me...
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc i'm yet to be fully convinced...
username26: the mic in hand...does that mean...content?? 🎤
username27: yn in red and charles in red seem like the perfect pair ngl
danielricciardo: just ignore them all and come and interview me instead, we'll have the best time 🥺
ynusername: @/danielricciardo omw now 🏃🏻♀️🏃🏻♀️
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liked by carlossainz55, landonorris and 101,486 others
ynusername: the interview you’ve all been waiting for, see what I got up to with the men in red during race weeekend 🏎️❤️
27,492 comments
carlossainz55: the best time with you, we love you yn!! 🫶🏻🫶🏻
username28: about time i can't believe it
landonorris: as much as i hate to admit it, you three are a pretty funny trio 😂
ynusername: @/landonorris i'll take that as a compliment coming from you!
username29: now THIS is the content that we've all been waiting for
username30: my heart just stopped for a moment to make sure that this is true 🥺
danielricciardo: i still confidently argue that we'd have a better time
username31: not me watching this on repeat for the whole weekend
charles_leclerc: my belly still hurts from laughing so hard...i hope you're proud of yourself 😂😂
ynusername: @/charles_leclerc ngl feelin' pretty smug rn
username32: screw the race, this is the content we came to see
arthur_leclerc: don't tell charles but he's not stopped talking about how great you are since this interview 🤭
charles_leclerc: @/arthur_leclerc you know this is a public comments section, right??
username33: do you know how long i've been waiting to see a post like this??
username34: all my christmasses just came at once
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liked by pierregasly, ynusername and 2,593,706 others
charles_leclerc: KING OF MONACO 👑🏎️
103,584 comments
username35: we're so proud of you charles congratulations! ❤️❤️
ynusername: such an awesome drive, couldn't be happier for you 🏎️🏁
charles_leclerc: @/ynusername thank you for coming to cheer me on!!
username36: about time...bow down to the king 👑
maxverstappen1: congrats brother, i'll catch you next time
landonorris: i can see how hard you you're trying not to cry here hahah
username37: you deserve this more than anyone else in the world 💕💕
oscarpiastri: no one deserved to win more than you today, thrilled for you bro
username38: enjoy the celebrations, they're so well deserved king 💞💞
carlossainz55: the only time i'll ever say that i'm happy to lose to my teammate hahah
charles_leclerc: @/carlossainz55 just call me the smooth operator lol
username39: someone please stop the tears from falling now 😭
georgerussell63: damn that was a pretty good drive charle
username40: i've never been so on the edge of my seat in my life
lewishamilton: enjoy the monaco celebrations tonight!! 🍾
username41: i'm not even driving yet i feel like all my dreams have come true
pierregasly: we're all so proud of you, all the hard work was worth it my friend
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liked by charles4life, ferrarifanforever and 1,707 others
f1wags: is this the proof that we needed? during the summer break charles and yn have been seen lapping up the french sun on a local private yacht 🤔🏎️
username42: nobody speak to me i am officially deceased 😭
username43: surely no one can argue with this now
username44: thank you f1 gods for listening to my prayers 🙏🏻
username45: look at those smiles, they're perfect for each other
username46: obsessed obsessed obsessed 🤩🤩🤩🤩
username47: it doesn't feel right to be so happy for two people who don't know who i am
username48: i hope they know just how happy all us fans are for them
username49: my heart is so happy rn ❤️❤️❤️
username50: just hope that all the fans can get behind them and help them see how adorable they are
username51: it's my birthday today, and now my wish has come true!!
382 comments
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liked by ynusername, lewishamilton and 3,592,103 others
charles_leclerc: shout-out to my biggest fan, thank you for always cheering me on 🫶🏻💕
193,605 comments
username52: not charles coming at us with the hard launch like this ❤️❤️
landonorris: at least now i'm not the only one who has to listen to you gush about yn
username53: i was not prepared for such an adorable set of photos 🥺
pierregasly: oh you have a girlfriend?? you should've mentioned it hahah 🙄
username54: how did these two ever think we wouldn't find out about their relationship
georgerussell63: excuse me, double date is when? 🤔
carmenmmundt: i second what george just said 🫡
ynusername: @/carmenmmundt i'm all yours whenever you want me
ynusername: couldn't be prouder of you...you never fail to blow me away 🩷🩷
charles_leclerc: @/ynusername i try my best just for you my love
username55: did i mention how obsessed with these two i am yet?
username56: my heart is racing a thousand miles an hour seeing these
carlossainz55: can't believe you tried to pretend that you two weren't dating to the whole team, as if it's not horrifically obvious?? 🙄🙄
username57: i'm so happy to see charles with someone whose rooting for him like yn does
username58: btw if there was a competition for cutest couple these two would definitely win 💯
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liked by charles_leclerc, oscarpiastri and 104,684 others
ynusername: I could get used to all this romance stuff with you 🥺💞
21,597 comments
˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗
#f1#f1 imagine#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#formula 1#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x you#f1 fanfic#f1 reaction#formula one#formula one x you#formula x reader#formula 1 drabble#formula one x reader#formula one imagine#formula 1 fic#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc drabble#charles leclerc x reader#f1 drabble#f1 fluff#f1 x you
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“diamond tiara crushed in two, my heaven crashes down for you”
synopsis - you are a royal, they aren't. would it be such a crime for them to be someone more than a companion of yours?
includes - argenti, aventurine, boothill, sunday, reca
warnings - gn!reader, fluff, slight crack, i have no clue what im doing, wc - 2.8k
a/n: ngl this only came about cause my fav artist dropped a new single... something else was inspired by that which idk if i want to work on that onrle rrr
argenti ★↷
↪argenti was once the commander of the knights that protected the region. well, he still was but now most of his time was spent beside you. as your very own personal knight.
↪it was agreed very widely that argenti was by far the best knight in the kingdom. so it was inevitable that he ended up in such a trusted position - and it was also safe to say that your safety was pretty much always guaranteed with him around.
↪naturally, he still held his title as the commander but spent most of his days by your side so normally he would put others in charge in his absence. although in honesty, argenti never minded.
↪argenti enjoyed his job as a knight, he liked helping people out and defending the kingdom he was proud to be part of. a part of him enjoyed the serenity of spending his days with you.
↪most of it tailoring to him following you around as you attended meetings and the occasional trips to the town. and even argenti had a bit more freedom as you always let him do what he wanted but even willingly, argenti would happily spend time with you.
– – –
you walked idly through the corridors, you had nothing to do as of late. bored out of your mind. your only real idea was to head out to the town and see if they had anything to satisfy your boredom, although to do so you thought it may be best to find argenti first.
you knew where to find him however. if you were going out you wanted him to accompany you, not just as your guard but as a companion - you didn't really need a guard in your opinion. but you quickly found the knight in the training grounds.
he was very dedicated to his training. it was always intriguing to you when you did catch him in action - in training or in a real life scenario. so you couldn't exactly help but take a seat nearby and watch as he trained.
you weren't trying to be creepy but it was interesting, and rather entrancing, so you watched. although you should've expected argenti to notice your presence as soon as you sat down. he huffed as he stopped swinging his ornate spear, stabilizing himself, he stopped and turned to you with a smile.
“is there something you need your highness?” argenti slowly walked closer to you and quickly noticed the flushed expression on your face at being caught.
you tried stammering out a response but quickly gave up and broke eye contact looking at the ground. argenti let out a small laugh, “if there's something you require of me, please do let me know”
eventually you managed to piece together a coherent sentence and explained how you wanted to go visit the town for a bit. argenti agreed, like he would ever not agree, and excused himself for a moment to get ready and don his armor.
argenti always loved when he got to accompany you anywhere. your presence was such a joy for him and a selfish part of him enjoyed knowing that he spent the most time with him - argenti knew you enjoyed his presence as well which always made his heart soar.
but he was merely your personal knight. he should be glad to be granted such a title, but when you take him by the hand and lead him to wherever you wanted with that smile on your face, he could convince himself that for a fleeting moment, you two were something more.
aventurine ★↷
↪a diplomatic representative of the stoneheart group who spent their time negotiating and delivering messages between various kingdoms. a neutral group who maintained positive relationships with all kingdoms to survive.
↪aventurine was always responsible for being sent to your kingdom, and so he would always make an appearance when your council met to discuss. a part of you was curious if he'd ever drop his position among the stonehearts to become a permanent member of your council.
↪he always had very valuable insights that always seemed to work towards bettering your kingdom as a whole rather than helping the relationship between the kingdom and the stonehearts. he also spent a decent amount of time rilling up your actual council members.
↪although, nowadays you noticed how he made more frequent visits to your kingdom, and specifically you. aventurine would occasionally come and find you just to drag you away from your duties and hang out - something you never actually minded, even if you should've..
– – –
aventurine walked through the lone halls of your residence, he found it almost laughable how easily the guards let him in, how much they trusted him. he could easily walk in with the wrong intentions and dismantle your kingdom from the inside out but you both knew he wouldn't. which was why he was here now.
bursting through your room's doors, you shot up from your paperwork before relaxing at the sight of the emissarie.
“hello to you too aventurine,” you briefly glanced over to your calendar “what are you doing here? seeing as we have no meetings…”
aventurine smiled as he sat himself on the corner of your desk “do i have to have a reason to see you?” he knew he didn't, he knew you'd always welcome his presence at any time.
“you know you don't want to be stuck here doing..” he looked at what was laid across your desk, making a vague shrugging motion “whatever that is, take a break! we can walk around for a bit!”
you knew you shouldn't listen to him, that he was a bad influence on you. but one look at your desk was enough to convince you that aventurine was right. you'd have even more work to do when you got back but who was going to tell you off? aventurine was definitely one of your best “advisors”.
he smiled when he watched you stand up and he followed suit, already talking about all the things that had happened since he last saw you (which was barely two days) and asking you about what you wanted to do.
suddenly your boring day filled with paperwork was actually going to be exciting, spent with someone you liked as more than one of your emissaries.
boothill ★↷
↪apart of a group of mercenaries known as the galaxy rangers. they take up whatever contract they agree with and pay the most of course. the “galaxy ranger” name is simply a convenient way of finding the best mercenaries in the regions - whether or not someone can get one to work for them is a different story.
↪boothill was once hired by a rivaling kingdom to bring down yours, he didn't exactly agree with his contractor but they did have rather deep pockets. that hesitation of his was what you used to save your kingdom. paying boothill more than what he had previously been offered.
↪and what better way to ensure your kingdom's safety than to constantly ensure boothill worked as a mercenary for your kingdom by paying him. it was a simple solution in your eyes and boothill wasn't going to complain.
↪although as time went on, boothill was seen less as a mercenary and more as a companion - seeing as you spent quite a bit of your free time talking with him and listening to his takes from traveling all over.
– – –
“so tell me again why i’m accompanying ya?” boothill poised as he watched you eye up some shop window displays
you hummed “because i gave argenti the day off for his hard work” turning to face him you continued, “and your nice company”
nice company huh? boothill would've never considered himself to be nice company for anyone but he wasn't going to argue your word. it wasn't entirely uncommon for you to drag him around the town when you were bored, always giving that same excuse or saying something along the lines of being blunt and just wanting to hang out.
boothill would be lying if he said he didn't enjoy this time with you. it was always peaceful, a nice respite from his daily activities - which admittedly became more calm themselves ever since you began paying him to be loyal to your kingdom.
even if you were to stop paying him, he reckoned that he would still never go against your kingdom. there was something about you that was enchanting to the mercenary, no wonder you were royalty. he could spend ages thinking about you, he had no clue why however.
boothill had no idea why he felt this way about you. you were just another stupid royal who was too big for their boots. and yet, he stuck around. he indulged in your conversations and requests, he genuinely enjoyed being around you and-
“say, why don't we stop for lunch on the way back?” your voice broke his chain of thought and that smile of yours practically rendered him entranced
“sure, your choice, your highness” and he reveled in your brightening smile that was caused by him, the one that made his knees weak and he couldn't care less about how you grabbed his hand and practically dragged him away.
sunday ★↷
↪the oh so prestigious high priest of the land. the one in charge of all the churches and so he had a spot on the royal council. not only as the main representative of the churches but also as an advisor.
↪he was a form of spokesperson for the people who confided their issues with him and some of his ideas had helped the kingdom greatly, so he definitely deserved a seat among your council
↪sunday was very reliable. he would always show up to meetings and always ensured that services within the church were planned and carried out to the nest they could be. a man devoted to fulfilling his role. although with how long you'd known him, he had a few flaws.
↪namely his “people problem”. not that he despised anyone but at times he could be quite uptight and rather condescending - namely when discussing with your other advisors which made for quite the trouble occasionally.
↪but you valued his advice and so he kept his position. although you also highly valued his companionship, something he would deny of but secretly indulge in your favoritism of him - like a bird preening in front of a mirror.
– – –
service had finished mere moments ago. sunday sighed and closed up his book as he kept an eye on the last couple stragglers exiting the sermon.
so he couldn't exactly miss the line figure that walked down the aisle to his position. in honesty, even if he did miss it then sunday would know it was you, after all you had developed the rather neglectful habit of visiting him after his services - neglectful as you were obviously shrugging away duties to be here.
his face resumed his stern look that he usually held before he addressed you “your highness, you know you mustn't be here”
but you both knew that even if he sounded annoyed he wasn't. you knew that he enjoyed your clear favoritism to the priest but he cared too much about appearances and positions to let it shine through, in your opinion.
“i don't think i do” you responded, sunday quickly picked up on that playful tone of yours, he knew what he was in for “would you mind enlightening me priest?”
oh aeons how he hated that dumb smile of yours. that stupidly pretty smile that made his heart skip a few beats. no, he couldn't let you break his act down so quickly, that would be embarrassing for him. so he collected himself and answered
“considering i enlightened you yesterday, i have no need to repeat. or is your memory that bad? if so i feel a trip to your healer is necessary then?” when he heard you grumble, he knew he'd managed to save his facade.
this wasn't exactly the first, or even the last, time that you slinked away to spend time with him when he had nothing going on. but you were the monarch. you had duties to attend to and so despite his true wishes of wanting this time with you, he always urged you to go back to your duties.
“fine then” you huffed “i'll be seeing you tomorrow then”
turning on your heel, you began leaving with a stumped sunday who was wracking his brain for any idea of what you meant behind you. but he couldn't think, so he had to ask
“what's tomorrow?” sunday hadn't got anything planned with you tomorrow, yes he had other things but nothing that you should've been aware of
you stopped in your tracks and turned around, feigning shock and hurt, you gasped “don't tell me you forgot! the meeting tomorrow?”
sunday paused, “but that's the day after, no? we agreed so at the last meet”
as soon as that smile of yours widened, it all clicked together in his head “oh it is? my.. well i already have a cleared schedule for that time.. wouldn't want to waste it?”
turning around again you continued, “so ill be seeing you at noon then” before walking away once more
sunday stood in confusion for a moment and before realizing fully and blurting out “you-” but you were already out of earshot, also missing the smile that crept onto his face.
reca ★↷
↪an infamous playwright who recently had taken residence in your kingdom. his plays were known far and wide by everyone, highly praised and honored. people always eagerly awaited even a whisper of what his new creation was.
↪and so naturally, you had become a patron of his. always sponsoring his plays as you were quite the fan yourself. whenever you saw that he had a new play that was being performed, you immediately cleared your schedule for that time and got your ticket - they were always in high demand.
↪reca was faltered that royalty such as yourself was so deeply invested in his writings and he greatly appreciated the sponsorship, it enabled his plays to reach greater heights. and so it was only natural that he started pandering some of his plays to you.
↪more based around subjects that he learnt you loved, your favorite troupes, anything you deemed intriguing and so on. of course, they all came out as hit plays but he knew they were slightly more special than just his average play.
– – –
reca stood from the sideline, hidden behind a deep maroon curtain, as his latest play came to an end. he watched as the actors he so desperately searched for took a bow as gifts were showered upon them for his characters he created for them.
but nowadays, he cared less about audience validation and more about a specific person - yes he still valued the opinion of anyone that saw his plays as that's what kept him going mostly but this play was special. he spent ages driving himself into sleep deprivation and stress trying to perfect it.
all because he tailored it for you.
his number one, and favorite, patron. he'd seen you take your seat and eagerly awaited your critique for his piece. reca wouldn't mind if you didn't pick up on the hints that it was tailored towards you, just as long as you enjoyed it. and his question was soon answered.
reca's ears perked up when he heard your voice call out to him. you shouldn't be backstage, but nobody would stop you. a confident smirk graced his face when you immediately starting rambling about specifics of his play, what you liked the most, how well it flowed etc etc.
he took your praise in strides, even more so when you poised him a question.
“oh! mr reca, you must tell me how you got inspiration for the main character!” you seemed so happy and so rene's smirked widened
“well if you must know your highness, it was about a special patron of mine” reca watched as your face twisted into something akin to confusion as you tried to figure out what that meant.
he nearly laughed when your expression portrayed a more shocked and embarrassed tone, you tried stammering out a sentence “so what about their lover-”
“well a writer must take some creative liberty, no? and one's subconscious might influence those decisions” he held back a laugh as your face flushed.
“your a tease mr reca” you huffed. and he only smiled back as you too let a smile creep onto your face.
taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @frankiesteinn
#—stellaronhvnters.#x reader#x gender neutral reader#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#honkai star rail x gender neutral reader#honkai star rail x you#hsr x gender neutral reader#hsr x you#hsr argenti#argenti x reader#hsr aventurine#aventurine x reader#hsr boothill#boothill x reader#hsr sunday#sunday x reader#hsr reca#reca x reader#mr reca x reader
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Silent Night



Summary - You're back from college for the holidays, and you've decided on exactly what you want for Christmas - Joel Miller's cock.
A/N: this was such a last minute fic im ngl rn. wasn't even planning on posting a Christmas fic, let alone my FIRST dbf joel miller smut?? anyway, i hope everyone enjoys. happy Christmas<3
Pairing: dbf!Joel Miller x f!reader
Word count: 3k
Warnings: smut, some good ole daddy kink, age gap (20+ years), Joel is pretty pervy in this, alcohol, divorce mentions. Not proofread because I'm tired
DO NOT COPY THIS FIC IN ANY WAY PLS AND TY.
When you left for college all that time ago, Joel didn't have any strong feelings towards you. You were his best friend's kid, so naturally he saw you often, and got close with you. You were a sweet kid, kind, smart (more than him, he reckoned), and very.. determined when you wanted to be.
Now you're back for Christmas, and as he sees you exiting your dad's car, hurrying over to him, yelling “Joel! Joel! Oh, I missed you so much!” he realises how fucked up his mind might be.
Any normal guy who was reuniting with a girl he'd known since she was a teenager, and a girl he had at least 20 years on, would not be looking at how her tits bounced in her crop top, or how her leggings were tight enough to let him see just how perfect your ass was.
But Joel wasn't normal, he wasn't a good man, so he was looking for all of those things. If he'd actually been looking at your face, maybe he'd have seen you smirking. Maybe he'd have realised you wore those clothes for exactly this reason.
-
Joel, or dad's best buddy, Mr Miller, as you'd known him until you were 16 and couldn't be bothered to pay respect to your elders, had been a part of your life for a while.
Ever since your mom took off, Joel was coming around far more often and, in his own gruff and quiet way, was taking care of you more than your own father was at the time.
Nowadays, you didn't really have any resentment towards your father because of this - he'd just gotten divorced, he was going through a rough time.
But teenage you definitely did, and having Joel step in like that definitely left you with mixed feelings.
If things weren't the way they were back then, you'd probably have developed this all-encompassing crush on him even earlier.
When you were leaving for college though, the crush suddenly dived into your life, crashing down and muddling up everything you thought you knew about yourself.
Now, as you returned back home at last, you knew you had to have him, or you feared you might just lose it.
He was everything a girl.. like you, could want right now. Old, brooding, mysterious, and so fucking hot.
So as you hopped over to him where he stood in his front lawn, you made sure to hug him tight and make sure he could really feel that you weren't wearing a bra. You knew he was looking already, so why not let him feel it?
He hesitated for a moment - probably struggling with his boner which you swore you could already feel - before bringing his arms around you and clapping you on the back.
“I missed you so much, Mr Miller.” You hum sweetly, looking up at him through your eyelashes. His own eyes almost flutter shut at the name you chose to use for him, and he manages to choke out a soft missed ya too, darlin’.
That darlin’ would be enough to make you come tonight.
Your dad finally turns around after unloading your luggage and turning the car off, greeting Joel before the two of you head to your house.
-
The next day, it's Christmas Eve. Dinner rolls around, and you check over your makeup one more time. You don't want it to be too much - it would look weird, considering it was only Joel coming over (your dad was a solitary creature) - but you still had to look good for him.
The doorbell rings and you almost trip down the stairs. “I'll get it, dad!” You yell, and he thanks you, completely unaware of your motives.
You open the door, biting back a smirk when Joel immediately looks you up and down, only just managing to tear his eyes away from your chest.
“Hi, Mr Miller. It's so good to see you.” You smile sweetly.
“Hi, sweetheart… told ya y’dont have ta call me that. Joel's fine.” He says softly, eyes still a little hazy.
You step back to let him inside and immediately take one of the beers he'd brought over once he sets the case down.
“Y’old enough to drink that, honey?” He teases, mind finally out of the gutter for now.
“I'm 21 in like.. a month. It's fineeee.” You smirk, tipping your head back and taking a big swig, showing off the long column of your neck and the swell of your breasts.
His mind is back in the gutter.
Your eyes are off him for now, so he allows him to drink in the sight of you properly. A silly Christmas hat atop your curled, gorgeous hair; red sweater tight around your breasts, little candy-canes dotted around it; your skirt, far too short and he's almost certain you're teasing him now, tights underneath making him want to rip them clean off of you. Your makeup looks perfect, red lips which he knows would look perfect around his cock, mascara which he can picture smudged and ruined from tears and sweat while you fuck-
“Joel, y’made it! Cmon, sit with me.” Your dad grins, and Joel's eyes widen. What the fuck is wrong with him? He cannot be thinking that way about you.
He shakes his head, muttering something to himself before going to sit with your dad.
-
Joel finally thinks he'll have some reprieve from your incessant teasing, letting out a tired sigh as he sits on the couch, your dad on the armchair.
“Tired already, old man?” Your dad teases.
“You're older than me, asshole.” Joel grunts, earning him a chuckle.
Just then, you appear in the doorway. Of course, of-fucking-course, you'd decide to watch TV with them tonight. It's soccer, for Christ's sake, you'd always get bored out of your mind and run upstairs to go on your phone whenever the game was on.
Not today though, much to Joel's dismay.
“What're you watching?” You ask, sitting beside Joel. He tries to mask his discomfort.
“Just soccer hon, I know you don't like-” your dad starts, but you quickly cut him off.
“No, no! It's fine. I'll try watching it tonight.” You smile softly, and settle in to watch.
You clearly get bored after about 5 minutes, sighing softly.
“You really find this interesting?” You murmur to Joel, now having made yourself comfortable on his shoulder. He tried to make himself as stiff as possible when you first lay on him, but you were persistent as always, and he just gave in.
“Ain't nobody forcin’ you to watch it.” He argues, and you keep quiet after that, eventually getting up to go get the food ready.
-
Dinner is yet another trial for Joel. You've gotten just as frustrated and impatient as he is, it seems.
Leaning in front of him when serving the food, giving him a clear view of your tits. Not to mention you never serve food, set the table, but all of a sudden you're acting like little miss helpful today.
‘Accidentally’ dropping a cup and bending over in his eyeshot to pick it up.
Sitting beside him at the table instead of with your dad.
When your hand moves to his thigh, he bolts upright, earning him a look from your dad.
“Bathroom,” is all he can get out before he's rushing upstairs.
“Fucking kid. Thinks she can fuckin’.. pull all this shit with me.. thinks she can act like this in front of her dad.. fuck me.” He mutters to himself, despite undoing his belt and pulling his cock out, barely stifling his groan when he spits on his palm and starts tugging at his length so fast it's almost painful.
His mind conjures up all sorts of unholy images, and he's on the brink of release when- “Mr Miller,” you coo, knocking on the door. “is everything okay? You've been gone for like 10 minutes. Was it something in the food?”
He's so angry, so pent-up, he wants to pull you in here and just fuck that goddamn attitude out of you.
He's deathly silent, flushing, turning on the sink as he pulls his pants up, blue-balled like he'd never been before, and exiting the bathroom.
“Everything is fine.” He grits out, fists clenched as he walks past you. You eye his bulge and smirk before practically skipping down the stairs.
“He said everything's fine, daddy.” You smile to your dad, and he almost collapses. He swears he sees god for a second.
That word coming out of your mouth should absolutely not turn him on like it just did - but it did.
The rest of dinner, he's almost silent, just gulping down beer and chewing on his now cold turkey. You don't try anything with him, actually a little afraid he might just get up and leave.
Instead, you wait until the movie.
Your dad puts Die Hard on, and after a lengthy argument about whether or not it even counts as a Christmas movie, - you insist it's not and will carry that with you to the grave - you settle beside Joel.
Joel thinks he's made it through the worst of the evening, but then you shiver. You shiver again, and then you pout, and he feels obliged to ask.
“Are you cold?”
“Yeah.. can I have some of the blanket?” You whisper. Your dad is practically falling asleep in the armchair.
He goes to hand you the blanket, and you, devious as ever, put it over both of your laps, cuddling up to Joel even more.
He's on full alert right now, stiff as a log, waiting for your next game.
The movie goes on, and then your hand creeps under the sheet. Moving from the side, to your own lap, to his arm, then to his leg-
“What're you-” he grunts, but you just shush him.
“I'm trying to watch the movie, Joel.” You huff, as if your hand isn't on his cock right now.
His eyes are darting between you, the screen, his lap under the blanket, and your dad. Way too much is going on, and as you start palming him, he lets out the most pained groan. He sees you biting your lip and he's so angry, so horny, he doesn't know what to do with himself.
Your dad suddenly wakes up, and the bubble pops. You pretend you're asleep on Joel's shoulder, and you know you've won when Joel tells your dad to just go on up, that he'll make sure she gets to bed.
As soon as your dad's bedroom door shuts, Joel grabs your jaw, glaring at you.
“Exactly what the fuck do you think you're doing, little girl?” He spits, and you giggle softly.
“‘m not doing anyth- ow, Joel!” You whimper when he squeezes your cheeks together.
“You gonna tell the truth now? Gonna answer me properly?” He says, tone and eyes cold as the ice on your driveway.
You nod, trying to stifle your whimper. He eases the grip on your jaw, still holding it, before asking you again.
“What do you think you're doing?” He says through clenched teeth, and you know he's not fucking around anymore.
“I.. I just..” Fuck it, you may as well shoot your shot, otherwise what was the point of everything tonight anyway?
“I wanted you to fuck me, Joel.”
Creak goes the step at the top of your staircase, and you squeak, jumping off the couch as Joel pulls the blanket and a pillow over his lap. You rush upstairs past your dad, hurriedly bidding him goodnight before slamming your door.
“Just came to grab my phone. Everythin' alright..?” He asks, brows furrowed at your skittish behaviour.
Joel nods, and your dad leaves him alone.
His cock has been throbbing for hours. So long that it's actually painful. But now he can't do anything. You and your dad are upstairs, you'll be asleep in 5 minutes, and Joel will just have to pretend it's your pussy wrapped around his length when he fucks his fist in the guest bedroom tonight.
-
Guilt gnaws away at him as he cleans his come off of his hand and stomach, tossing the tissues into the bin before changing into some sweats and managing to fall asleep after half an hour of tossing and turning.
The world seems to hate him, since he wakes up at 2am, heading to the bathroom only to walk past your bedroom and hear you moaning. He can't make out what you're moaning - but he has a good idea - and he's thankful your doors are quiet when he opens the one to your room.
You're facing away from the door, legs spread, face in your pillow as your hips buck, fingers working your pussy furiously.
“Joel, Joel, fuck-” you gasp, whimpering as you get close.
Fuck this.
If he didn't get to come for the entire evening, you did not get to come right now.
He walks over to you, morales abandoned, and growls your name.
You squeak, biting your lip as you turn and look at him. You'd been so close, but now you're too petrified to finish.
“Joel, I-”
“Not another word.”
It's the last thing he says before he flips you back onto your stomach, pushing your head down into the pillows.
“You're gonna be a good girl and shut the fuck up while I fuck this needy pussy. You understand me?”
You part your lips to reply, earning a spank to your ass.
“Can't fuckin’ listen, can ya? No talking, baby.”
You nod, whimpering as he pushes your head back down and pulls your soaked panties off, tossing them onto the floor.
“Fuck, look at her. Drippin’ for me, ain't she? Didn't know you were such a slut, babygirl.” He teases, knuckles dragging along your slit, and you cry into the pillow, hips bucking back against his hand.
Another spank, making you moan, trying to stop your hips from bucking once more.
“You take what you're fucking given. Do you understand me?”
You nod, having learnt from your mistakes.
“Good girl. Knew you could listen for me.” He coos, before he's thrusting two of his thick fingers into your dripping heat.
You gasp and whine, moaning his name into the pillow, almost tearing your sheets with how hard you grip them.
“That's right.. moan my name. Fuckin’ slut.” He grunts, head ducking down to tease your clit with his tongue. You almost lose it, starting to clench hard and fast around his fingers. You're right on the edge when he pulls away.
“Joel!” You practically sob, deflating as your orgasm drifts away.
“Shh, shh. You thought you could tease me all night and still get off? Y’thought wrong, honey.” He coos, mocking, pulling down his sweatpants and slicking up his cock with your wetness, giving you no warning as he starts to push in.
“Ohh, fuck. Knew you'd be tight for me, baby. That's it, good girl.” He groans, bottoming out. He allows you to cry his name into the pillow, but when he starts really fucking you, it gets too much.
He pulls out to the tip before slamming back into you, making you almost scream, back arching and hips bucking - unsure if you want him to get out, or fuck you even harder.
He decides for you, starting to pound into you. The only sounds in the room are your broken moans, his heavy breathing, and the rhythmic slapping of skin on skin.
“Joel- Joel- pl-please I'm gonna come- please Daddy-” you moan, and his hips stutter before he's pulling you up by your hair, his back to your chest when he resumes his aggressive thrusts.
“Shut- the fuck- up.” He pants in-between thrusts, and you whimper, brows drawing together as you get close. He starts rubbing your clit and you see stars, unable to stop yourself from coming.
“Fuckfuckfuck yes, yes daddy- oh my god-” you sob, before he's pulling out and manhandling you onto your back, thrusting back inside to the hilt, palm covering your mouth.
“You better shut up right now unless you want your real daddy to wake up, find us here like this-” you curse silently when you clench around him at the thought - what is wrong with you?
“Oh, you like that? Dirty fucking girl. Such a slut for daddy, huh?” You clench tighter at that, and his thrusts speed up, pace irregular. “Yeah, you fuckin’ like that.”
His hand leaves your mouth and you cover it yourself, not wanting to anger him anymore.
“‘s okay, baby.” He murmurs, taking your hand from your mouth and leaning down to kiss you. As he does, his hand goes to your clit, and you moan loudly, muffled slightly by the kiss, as your back arches off the bed and you come so hard you see stars, setting off his own release and making him groan, biting your shoulder as he fills you up.
It's quiet for a moment, save for your shared panting, before he pulls out.
“Fuck, honey..” he murmurs, watching your shared fluids dribble out of your cunt, gathering them up on his fingers and pushing them back into your tight hole.
“Made such a mess, didn't we?” He says softly, brushing your hair away from your eyes as you giggle softly, nodding.
“That was so good.” You whisper, and he nods, gathering you up in your arms.
“Joel, you can't stay in here-” you mutter, confused.
“Just relax, honey. I'll leave in the mornin’. Just let me hold you for now.”
You're utterly perplexed, but you're definitely not complaining, swallowed up by his warmth and drifting off within a minute.
-
The next morning, you're opening presents, and you bite your lip when he reads his card from you. At the bottom, you'd added - come to my room afterwards for the second part of your gift - and when he comes upstairs afterwards, it's safe to say he doesn't leave for a good hour.
Dividers by @adornedwithlight <3
Thank you sm for reading, I hope you enjoyed! Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated! Have a good Christmas everyone!! ❤️
#pedro pascal#pedro pascal characters#joel miller#the last of us#tlou hbo#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller angst#joel miller imagine#joel miller tlou#joel miller fic#joel tlou#joel x reader#joel miller fluff#joel miller comfort#joel miller fan fiction#joel miller fanfic#joel miller one shot#joel miller smut#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x reader#joel miller x reader smut#joel miller x you#the last of us smut#the last of us fic#tlou#tlou fanfiction#amyispxnk fics#pedro pascal character#pedro pascal fandom
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Break Our Ice - Chapter 1
pairing: paige x azzi
wc: 7.8k (what?? holy shit)
au fic what??, figureskater!Azzi x icehockeyplayer!Paige
fake dating, just like playful banter teasing relationship to lovers, basically paige and azzi dancing around each other
a/n: okay so!! first post/fic kinda nervy..AHAH all these great writers on here have really inspired me so yeahhh, I haven't written fanfic or really written anything in a REALLLYY long time so um yea im a little rusty ngl. anyway, the motivation needs to keep pumping so i would love to here some live reacts or just any comments and feedback, lwk unedited so like if u see anything just lmk so here goes nothing!! love y'all (wait also im from australia, yep, all the way down under, i tried writing this with like american spelling n what not cuz we use british english) - but if i made any mistakes again let me know <3
Over a decade of figure skating, and Azzi hasn't ever hit anyone with an ice skate.
She was currently considering it, but she figured that the fact she hadn’t was mostly a sign that she was a good person, on the account that she thought of it and was actively refraining. Surely, that made her a better person than someone who never had to resist the temptation.
“Thank you for that fascinating look inside your brain,” Caroline says when Azzi voices this thought. “I hope you see a therapist about these disturbing violent urges.”
“Nobody likes a backseat psychologist,” Azzi tells her, and twists away before Caroline can tell her she’s misusing the phrase or something unwaveringly supportive.
It’s easy to lose herself in the motions of this routine, which is a beginner practice she chose for a cooldown. And the quieter her mind gets, the less homicidal she feels, which is probably better for everyone all around.
“Oi,” someone calls from the spectator stands, and Azzi’s mind splashes red very briefly. “I just said we booked this rink.”
Paige, the potential victim of ice-skate homicide, is looking over the stands, her jawline clenched in a way that looks very lickable (but she very quickly buried that thought).
“Didn’t you hear?” Azzi says brightly, spinning away, one foot crossing gracefully over the other. “You aren’t allowed to book the rink on the first Saturday of the month! It’s free use!” She calls over her shoulder.
She spins back around in time to see Jana, the giant Egyptian on their team, straighten up to a full height of probably 6’2. “Oh, okay! Sorry to bother you!”
She turns to leave and is stopped by Paige’s hand gripping her shoulder.
“Jana,” Paige says, her eyes shutting briefly as if praying for patience. “Wisen up, huh?”
Azzi snickers, sliding nearer to see that angry jawline up close, but her fun is quickly spoiled by the sight of the hockey team coach approaching the rink, evidently coming to see what the hold-up was.
“Ah, well,” she says hastily, crossing to the other edge to exit the rink. “I tried!” She yells across the ice to where the team is, and she swears on her life she can see Paige try to hide a smile.
She meets up with Caroline in the locker room, because of course Caroline had left at the specified time instead of sticking with Azzi to piss off the hockey team.
It wasn’t that Azzi enjoyed it, really. She was just generally opposed to getting walked over. If the end result was that the delicious-looking vein in Paige’s neck began to show, that was only a side benefit.
(And if Azzi and Kaitlyn occasionally go to their games, Azzi will maintain to her dying day that it is actually to throw them off their game and not an attempt at manifestation.)
“A poked bear may stumble in its sleep but eventually its eyes will open,” Caroline tells her.
“Caroline, you really are a weird girl,” Azzi says. “Repeat that with real-life words, please.”
Caroline thinks this over. “One of those guys is going to snap and hit you one of these days,” she offers instead.
Azzi scrunches her nose in disdain. “You should be more worried about me snapping.”
“I am,” Caroline says. “I’m worried that them snapping will make you snap and then we’ll get banned from this rink.”
“Out of curiosity,” Azzi asks, swinging her bag of practice clothes over her shoulder. “Why are you getting banned in this scenario?”
“I wouldn’t cooperate with law enforcement when they came to arrest you,” Caroline says solemnly.
Azzi stares at her, strangely touched. “Thank you. I’ll try not to get arrested.”
This resolution is tested immediately after leaving the rink, which had admittedly not been in Azzi’s plans.
“Azzi!” Jayden yells at her, jogging over from where he had been standing by his car parked outside the rink. “Hey, Azzi, listen-”
“I’ll piss on your grave and listen to your corpse roll,” Azzi says, but only quietly and only to herself.
“I got two tickets to a hockey game a week from now,” Jayden says, catching up to her, smiling that horrible smile that makes Azzi want to knock his teeth out. “I got a lot of girls asking me to come, but I thought I’d take you out.”
“Oh, did you?” Azzi asks, as flatly as possible. She’s already walked to the bus stop, and now she’s stuck waiting there while Jayden talks at her.
“C’mon, we can make a whole thing out of it,” Jayden says, oblivious to the murderous vibes Azzi is projecting.
“Not interested,” Azzi says. “Take one of the girls.”
“Aw, but I want to take you,” Jayden says, almost whining. “Besides,” oh god here it comes, “you do kind of owe me, for the whole free rink access.”
There it is. There is how Azzi has been roped into accepting nearly every invitation this stupid bastard has thrown her way over the last few months out of some desperate attempt to try and buy his way into her pants.
“I owe your dad,” Azzi reminds him, though she knows it won’t work. “Who owns the rink. Not you.”
“You know my dad wouldn’t want you to turn this down,” Jayden responds, like he always does. “He wants us to get closer.”
Azzi, in no small way, owed Geno her career, a debt that mattered more to her than any other chain she was attached to. And, no, Geno would not want Azzi strong-armed into going on pseudo-dates with his son, but it would make him upset if Azzi started fighting with the bastard, which was bound to happen soon because Jayden did not like to be told no.
“I can’t,” Azzi says, more out of spite than anything else.
“Why not?”
“I-” Azzi licks her lips and stares at the pimple sprouting on Jayden’s chin as maliciously as possible. She hopes it explodes. “I have a girlfriend who wouldn’t like that.”
Even as she says it, she regrets it. She isn’t even sure why she said it.
“A girlfriend,” Jayden echoes, his tone incredulous.
“A girlfriend,” Azzi maintains, desperately committed to her sinking ship. “She’s kind of overprotective, really.”
God, she’s fucked the second Jayden asks to see a picture. Or by next week, when Jayden inevitably asks why her so-called girlfriend has yet to drop by when Azzi practices. And then she’ll have to explain that she lied, and then Geno will look at her all confused and disappointed like the time Azzi had basically melted the entire rink by accidentally turning off a master switch that killed all the power in the building, and then her career and all her professional relationships will be burned down and it’ll all be Azzi’s own fault because she can’t keep her mouth shut and deal with a couple hours with Jayden. And apparently she likes to self-sabotage.
Azzi feels like she’s going to vomit. She feels like the sidewalk she’s standing on is starting to cave in beneath her, like the sky is suddenly bearing down on her shoulders, too heavy to carry, so close to pushing her to her knees.
“Hey!” A familiar voice calls from behind her. “You forgot your skates!” Azzi manages to turn on shaky legs to see Paige jogging towards her in sweatpants and her hockey jersey. She’s carrying a pink bag that had been a present from Kaitlyn, which Azzi uses to store her skates when she’s taking the bus.
“Ah, Paige” she manages to say through the depths of her spiralling thoughts.
She’s got a light sheen of sweat on her forehead- she’s probably been practicing, Azzi thinks dizzily- and her shoulders seem especially broad with that jersey on.
“Here,” Paige says, holding the bag out. When Azzi doesn’t make a move to take it, she clicks her tongue and, in a shockingly gentle movement, pulls Azzi’s hand up herself, so that she can place the bag on her palm. Then Azzi takes it, clumsily adjusting her grip so she’s holding it properly by the handles. Her breath is still coming too fast, her lungs burning in his chest.
A heavy hand settles on her shoulder, fingers settling near the nape of her neck shaking her lightly so that Paige can peer up into her eyes. “Hey,” she says, in a voice so soft it could have given Azzi an instant warmth in her con other, much different, circumstances. “What’s wrong with you?”
Paige’s hair is in its usual braided style, always neat, yet effortless like someone hadn't even wasted a second of their time putting it up like that. She’s got nice eyes, Azzi's noticed them before. A sort of blue that pierces into your soul and stays there. Her eyebrows are currently pulled down low, making the skin of her forehead wrinkle.
Jayden, who had been blissfully silent, up until now, decides to chime in. “Is this the girl?”
Paige steps forward, frowning. “Who’s this?” She asks, and she’s talking to Azzi but she’s looking at Jayden, and Azzi’s never been quite this grateful for Paige’s slight resting bitch face before.
“Just a friend,” she says smoothly. “Azzi, properly introduce us sometime, okay?”
“Sure thing!” Azzi says, as nicely as possible, which makes Paige head turn towards him again. It doesn’t matter because Jayden is already slithering back into his car that cost way too much money, not to mention insurance premiums, making excuses about why he has to leave.
It’s only once Azzi can’t even see the fumes created by that hideous fucking car that she lets her shoulders drop, her forehead drooping to rest on Paige’s shoulders. A little voice in her brain pops up to tell her that, in normal circumstances, she would rather die than be this vulnerable in front of this girl. But right now, in these circumstances, Azzi has just barely avoided having a panic attack in public and Paige’s jersey smells sweaty but not dirty, and her shoulders are such a steady place to rest her tired head.
“Um.” Paige says, and then a hesitant hand is rubbing her back, up and down in comforting strokes.
“Thank god you’re so scary, p,” Azzi mumbles, fisting his hands into jersey material on both sides of Paige’s chest, unwilling to pull away just yet. Fortunately, Paige doesn’t try to move, just keeps running her hand down Azzi back. It’s oddly comforting, Azzi’s breath starting to level out again.
“Don’t tell me you were letting that guy bully you,” Paige says, disbelieving. “You? I once saw you make Nika cry. Actual tears!”
Azzi laughs, despite herself, and finally stands up straight. She reluctantly releases the jersey she had clenched in her fists, and watches the material stay gathered where she had grabbed it.
“It’s hard to explain,” she says. “And I think your teammates are looking for you.”
KK has, in fact, wandered out, her hockey stick held out in front of her chest like a protective barrier.
“They were probably worried we’d killed each other,” Paige says, and makes a gesture Azzi can’t see at KK, who beams and gives her a thumbs up before running back inside.
“She did look glad to be out of the crossfire,” Azzi says, amused.
“Ah, you scare her,” Paige says dismissively, and then looks at her carefully. “Hey, uh-”
Azzi’s not sure what she expected, but it wasn’t for Paige to step forward and chuck her under the chin. “Cheer up, alright?“
“You’re ridiculous,” Azzi says exasperatedly. She doesn’t say thank you, but she hopes Paige can see it in her eyes. Maybe not. Either way, Azzi thinks, watching the girl lope away, she had been a temporary solution to a much bigger problem.
“It’s not a problem,” Kaitlyn tells her that evening. Azzi thinks she might be rolling her eyes, but she can’t tell because her face is smashed into her couch cushion, so all she can see is the thin cracks beginning to line the fabric. Kaitlyn is prone to rolling her eyes when Azzi complains to her, so it’s a strong possibility.
“It is a problem,” Azzi says into the couch, not budging from her comatose position. “I’m never leaving my apartment again. My body will atrophy, and my flesh will rot, and you’ll find it here, on this couch, being eaten by flies.”
“You sure have a talent for dramatics,” Kaitlyn says, blatantly unsympathetic. “If figure skating doesn’t work out, I’m sure you have a career waiting for you in monologuing.”
“I think you would make a great Hamlet,” Caroline adds helpfully, perched on Azzi’s armchair like an overgrown crow, brown hair cascading how her shoulders.
“Or the evil witches in Macbeth,” Kaitlyn says.
“I wish you guys were dead,” Azzi says, and rolls over onto her back so she’s looking at the ceiling instead. God, her ceiling is so fucking ugly, and she can’t even get it fixed because she’s never going to the Olympics, and she’s going to be poor and useless and tragically beautiful for the rest of her life-
“What is wrong with you?” Caroline says, and Azzi realizes belatedly that she’d been saying all of that out loud.
“I’m so fucked,” Azzi says, and her voice shakes more than she had meant it to. “What do I do?”
“You could confess you lied,” Kaitlyn suggests. “And say it was a spur of the moment thing, whoopsie.”
“And then what?” Azzi says glumly. “I’m stuck following Jayden anywhere he wants to go for the rest of his life, and being polite to him even when he starts acting like I’m some kind of Oliver Twist orphan his father took in and nurtured and I owe him my first born child”
“Christ,” Caroline says. “Just get your little hockey player to pretend she’s your girlfriend.”
Azzi sits up at that, tousled strands of hair falling out of her braids. “Are you completely insane?”
“I think it’s a good plan,” Kaitlyn says, unerringly loyal to the end. “You’re so smart, carol.”
“It’s an awful plan,” Azzi hisses. “What am I supposed to say? Sorry I’ve been actively antagonizing you and your team for a bit, please pretend to be my girlfriend to keep my career alive, and also if you notice I can’t stop blushing when you’re near me, don’t pay it any mind, I just think you’re really pretty?”
“Not exactly like that,” Caroline says. “But yeah, that’s the gist of it.”
Azzi stares at her for a minute, trying to will Kaitlyn to show some sort of outward contradiction. When it doesn’t work, she collapses with a huff back onto the couch. “I’m fucked,” she repeats.
KK the first one to notice her the next day, hovering awkwardly around the entrance as the team wraps up. Azzi remembers what Paige had said about KK being scared of her, so she tries her nicest smile, giving a small wave with her right hand.
“Hey!” KK says easily, coming up to her. She’s still in her hockey gear, but her ice skates are off. “Are you looking for Paige?”
“I am, yeah,” Azzi says slowly. “How did you know that?”
KK blinks at her, her head tilting slightly to the side in silent question. “You’re always looking for Paige.”
“Am not,” Azzi says, too defensively but she’s saved from hearing whatever KK has to say about that when Nika comes up to them, slinging an arm over KK’s shoulders, and making a mean face at Azzi.
“Don’t bully KK, her nerves can’t handle it,” Nika says and then takes a closer look at her face, and stops, eyes narrowing. “Woah, what’s wrong with you today?”
Azzi can’t imagine what she looks like right now. She has trouble sleeping at the best of times, and last night had been one of the worst. She had spent most of it lying on her back and picturing herself penniless and destitute, until the swirling darkness had seemed to take on a physical shape and that shape had started to laugh at her. By the time she’d gotten up, she hadn’t even had time to fix her hair, or cover up the dark circles that had formed under her eyes.
She pictures herself, her hair tangled and her skin greasy, and a new zit starting to pop-up over her cheekbone and just about turns herself around and walks out of the building all together.
“Azzi,” Nika says, “Azzi, Azzi, Azzi.” She’s waving a hand in front of Azzi’s face, concerned eyebrows visible through the gaps in her fingers.
Azzi flinches and smacks her hand away. “Listen,” she says. “I’m not in the mood to argue today. Is Paige here?”
Nika and KK have matching flabbergasted expressions, which is less than flattering. “You’re not in the mood?” Nika asks, like Azzi has just told her the Earth is going to get flattened by an asteroid in thirty seconds.
“I’m just-” It’s occurring to Azzi that this is possibly a really terrible plan and she should go home and think it over some more, without Kaitlyn’s cackling laugh in her ear, or at least come back with her hair brushed properly. “Yeah, I’m not in the mood, I’m gonna go, honestly-”
“No, don’t go!” KK says quickly, her hand lashing out to wrap around Azzi’s arm. Azzi stares at her dead-eyed, and she winces and repeats, quieter. “Don’t go, Paige’s just changing out. She took a hard hit today, so we let her off without helping clean up. She should be here any second.”
“Azzi?”
“Speak of the devil!” KK says, sounding relieved and steps fully away from Azzi so she can see Paige approaching them, a long bag slung over her back. Her jacket is nice, Azzi notices, an expensive brand Azzi sees at competitions sometimes. It’s zipped up fully, the black fabric clinging tight to every defined muscle in her arms and chest.
“You don’t practice here today,” Paige says. She looks concerned too. Azzi is getting a little tired of these hockey players looking concernedly at her.
Azzi can think of fifty million different things to say here. Maybe a ‘how did you know that?’ or a ‘what do you care?’ or ‘hey can I talk to you?’
What comes out of her mouth is, “are you okay?”
Because Paige’s got a red, swelling mark on her jaw, sure to darken into a bruise over the next hour. She seems a little surprised by the question, her eyebrows lifting. “Yeah, just took a hit this practice. It happens.”
“Right,” Azzi says, because she knows that, because she’s seen a hockey game before. She shifts from foot to foot carefully. She’s become horribly aware of how her tongue is sitting in her own mouth. “Happens.”
“Yeah,” Paige says slowly. She looks like she wants to check Aziz’s temperature. “Do you want to sit down?”
“No,” Azzi snaps immediately, her shoulders rising to her chin. “Do I look tired to you?”
The answer is yes, probably, and it would be right. Azzi is exhausted, and she does want very badly to sit down. Still, something in her eyes must show that Azzi is running low on straws to grab at, because Paige doesn’t say yes immediately, just pauses and shakes her head slowly.
KK and Nika are both still there, Nika draped over KK’s back, watching the two of them like she’s seeing a particularly rough tennis match.
“What are you guys still doing here?” Azzi says, irritated.
Nika only smiles insufferably, lips curling up. “There she is. All back to normal. C’mon KK, let’s leave them alone.”
Azzi watches them traipse off, her irritation rising inexplicably when she sees they’re holding hands.
“I actually fell when I got hit,” Paige says apologetically, distracting her. “So if you’re here to see me, I’m going to need to sit down. For my leg. Which hurts.”
Azzi fixes her in place with a hard glare, her feet firmly planted where they are.
Paige’s eyebrow twitches, just a little. She grabs her leg, completely unconvincing. “Ouch.”
The glare is getting a little hard to keep up.
“Fuck,” Azzi says, after a moment, feeling the burning frustration in her throat subside. It hits her suddenly, as her mind clears, what she must look like to Paige, and her lips twitch. Paige’s eyes widen in alarm and Azzi breaks into laughter, a genuine laugh, rising up from her chest, her shoulders dropping back down, her body relaxing like a puppet with its strings cut.
“Sorry,” she says to Paige, who is staring at her. “That wasn’t hysteria. Sorry. I just realized I was being stupid. Also, you suck at lying. Let’s go sit down.”
Azzi kicks absent-mindedly at the legs of Paige’s chair, too nervous to look up and meet her eyes. “So, that’s the situation,” she says. It sounds more insane when she says it out loud than it had when she’d practiced it.
“Sure,” Paige says. They’ve sat down in a dingy little fast food place next to the ice rink, empty at this time of day, which is good for professional athletes who need to discuss crazy people schemes in relative privacy. A packet of limp fries sits between them, grease saturating the packet, spreading in blobs across the thin paper.
“Sure,” Azzi mimics. Her kicking grows faster, the chair legs squeaking as she hits them harder and harder.
A hand wraps around her ankle the next time it flies to kick the seat and Azzi finally looks up to meet Paige’s eyes.
“If you break it, I’m not paying for it,” Paige says warningly, and then releases Azzi’s leg.
Azzi kicks the chair one more time for good measure and then sweeps her legs under her own chair. “Can you just say something?” She asks, trying to cover the flush rising to her face. “And if the answer is no, that’s okay, but just so you know I’m trusting you to not tell anyone else that I asked you-”
Paige runs her hands over her face, groaning, and for the first time Azzi notices that her ears are bright red.
Knowing they’re in the same boat makes her inclined to be kinder, and Azzi settles down in her seat, determined to wait her out.
“Alright,” Paige says. “We need to talk about this somewhere else. People could walk in here any time and the last thing I need right now is to become tabloid fodder.”
“Ah,” Azzi says knowingly, both of them standing up. “Olympics selection is coming up.”
“Yeah,” Paige says, scrubbing a hand through her hair, making it even more frizzy. “Also, I generally don’t like seeing my face on newsstands.”
Azzi considers that, as someone who also does not love to see their face on newsstands and even more so on tabloids yet somehow always ends up on them. Azzi used to really struggle with all the added media requirements but it seems that it just seems so come with the whole ice skating package. “seems reasonable..”
“Oh, that’s right,” Paige says, leading them out into the parking lot. “You’re always doing all those modelling campaigns. I guess you see yourself a lot, huh?”
Azzi smiles. “I took two medals at last year’s Grand Prix,” she says. “I’m in high demand, p”
Paige looks skeptical. “Oh really? Ask one of your model friends to date you for real.”
“Why do that, when I could hang out with you?” Azzi asks, cheerful once again. They’ve reached Paige’s car, which is apparently the more private place Paige had been talking about.
“The windows are tinted,” Paige explains, as they both climb into the vehicle. It’s a nice car, Azzi thinks jealously, trying not to stare too obviously at the smooth, expensive-looking interior.
“Do you think any of the players from your team are going to get selected?” Azzi asks, leaning against the passenger side window to look at Paige.
“Well,” Paige says, slanting a crooked grin in Azzi’s direction. “Me, obviously.”
As the smirk turns into a soft laugh Azzi feels her heart constrict and tries to remember how to breathe properly. “Obviously,” she says, and if it doesn’t sound half as sarcastic as she meant it to, Paige doesn’t mention it.
“Nika, too,” Paige continues, thoughtfully.
“I guess I’ll see you there,” Azzi says, and watches the crinkle around her eyes make a reappearance.
“Why can’t you just use another rink?” Paige asks. “If you won two medals already, you can probably afford it.”
Azzi tips her head back and tries to think of the best way to explain this. “Figure skating isn’t like hockey, or football, or basketball. We don’t get contracts for the season. We get paid if we win, and the costs of equipment and training add up. A lot of professional figure skaters rely on their families, or work side jobs. Plus, we retire early, so I need to save up while I’m ahead.”
Paige is watching her steadily, blue eyes giving Azzi her full attention. Somehow, Azzi hadn’t expected her to be this good of a listener.
“And this rink is private, so no fans show up to watch you practice, and it’s near my house.”
“It’s near mine too,” Paige shares and Azzi stores that information away in a small folder of her brain with a picture of Paige’s face taped over it.
“That’s not even it, though,” Azzi continues. “Figure skating’s hard to get into, if you don’t have any connections. When me and my family moved here- our last city didn’t even have an ice rink. I learned to skate on a frozen over pond. When we moved, I used to practice before school, after school, weekends, whenever we could afford it. Geno set everything up for me, he got me a good coach, he made all the right introductions. I do owe him, whatever he might think about it. I don’t want to make him upset.”
Paige is silent for a moment and then slumps forward over the steering wheel, making a noise like a dog throwing up, her forehead hitting the top of the wheel.
“Paige?” Azzi says, immediately concerned. “What the fuck?”
Paige doesn’t lift her head up, just mumbles to the floor. “Have you just been secretly cool this whole time and I didn’t know it?”
It’s enough to startle a laugh out of Azzi, the second time today.
“I feel like there’s definitely a less insane solution,” Paige says, straightening up. “But I can’t think of it, so I’ll do it.”
“You’ll do it?!”
“Just said I would.”
“Oh my god,” Azzi says, beaming so hard her cheeks are starting to ache. “Paige, you are a lifesaver. I will never say anything about your hockey team again.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep. Do you want a ride home?”
Azzi nods, so incandescently happy, she thinks she might be glowing, practically bouncing in her seat as she turns to buckle her seatbelt.
When she looks back at Paige again, Paige is already looking at her.
Azzi blinks. “What?”
“Nothing,” Paige grinds out through gritted teeth as she starts the car. “Nothing.”
“By the way,” Paige says, as the two of them inch through the weekday traffic. “Why do you take the bus anyway? Aren’t you worried you’ll be recognized?”
“No one is looking for a figure skater on public transport, Paige,” Azzi says. “Besides, I never learned how to drive, I much prefer being a passenger princess.”
Paige looks over at her, incredulous. “You never learned how?”
“I was busy,” Azzi says defensively. “I’m only twenty-two, you know. And there’s lots going on in my life.”
“I wasn’t judging,” Paige says, “just surprised. I failed mine like three times.”
Azzi sits up straight in her seat. “Three times? How do I get out of this car?”
Paige tsks disapprovingly. “Relax, it’s fine. I passed in the end, didn’t I?”
“Yeah, on the fourth try,” Azzi mutters. “I’d probably pass the bar exam if I took it on the fourth try.”
“You are not funny” Paige says, but she’s smiling as she says it. “Better to try and fail than never try, right?”
“Personally,” Azzi says, as haughty as she can manage. “I’d rather try and succeed.”
When they pull up in front of Azzi’s apartment complex, Azzi is nervous again, fidgeting with the hems of her sleeves as Paige parks.
“Should we like,” she winces even as the words leave her mouth, “come up with rules, or a plan or something.”
“We could,” Paige says dubiously. “But if you say some corny shit like ‘rule one is don’t fall in love with me’ I’m gonna break up with you.”
“I wasn’t going to say that!” Azzi snaps. Then because she can’t help herself, she adds, “Anyway, that would be the last rule. For dramatic effect.”
“I can’t believe people think you’re scary,” Paige says.
“Shut up,” Azzi says, ineffectively, as she pulls out her phone. She opens up her Notes app, and types in ‘Rules’ into the header.
“Nerd.”
“Hush.” Azzi types in ‘Rule 1’ and then stares at it.
“Well?” Paige prompts.
Azzi scowls at her. “Rule number one is don’t be mean to me.”
“Rejected,” Paige says, and unbuckles her seatbelt to settle a little more comfortably into her seat.
“Fine,” Azzi says. “Rule one is, we have to keep going for about two months. That’ll be enough time to convince Jayden the relationship is real, and for him to get off my case.”
Paige agrees, so Azzi moves on. “Rule two is you have to go with me to weekly dinners at Geno’s house.”
Paige sits up at that, alarmingly straight. “Every week?”
“Well, not if you’re super busy,” Azzi says, a little taken aback. “I can try to get you out of the first few, but we’ll definitely have to go to a few.”
“It’s just,” Paige pauses, and then looks at Azzi, seeming incredibly pained. “I’m like, a really bad liar.”
The earnest worry on her face is too much to bear, and Azzi turns her head to stifle her laughter into her shoulder.
“I can still see you laughing,” Paige says heatedly. “I’m serious!”
“Sorry, sorry,” Azzi says, still giggling a little. She holds up her hands. “Not laughing at you, I swear. I’ll do most of the talking, you can just sit back and nod along. I’ll tell them you’re shy.”
“Of course you will,” Paige says, shaking her head. “Fine, yeah, that’s alright then.”
“Rule number three is,” Azzi hesitates, trying to think of something that’ll annoy Paige to just the appropriate level. “Rule number three is you have to drive me home from practice everyday.”
She looks at Paige expectantly, hoping to see that thrilling neck vein start to stick out, but the other man just looks thoughtful. “I probably can’t everyday,” She says.
“Paige” Azzi says, staring at her, wide-eyed. “I was just kidding, I obviously don’t expect you to just drive me around.”
“I guess it depends on how our practice schedules line up,” Paige continues, like Azzi hadn’t spoken at all. “Send me yours, and I’ll see, alright?”
“Paige-” Azzi says, bewildered by how quickly this conversation has gotten away from her, but Paige keeps speaking.
“Rule four,” she says. “Since we’re already doing this, I have a family function to go to about two months from now too. If I do this, you have to come pretend to be my date for that.”
“Ooh,” Azzi says. “The Paige Bueckers can’t get a hot date on her own?”
“You’re one to talk,” Azzi says, impassive.
Azzi sticks out her tongue, but adds it down into her notes. She isn’t sure what to do with rule number three, so she leaves it on there, and then shows the list to Paige.
“Sure,” Paige says affably. “There we go.”
Azzi hesitates. “Just like that?”
“Do you want us to spit and shake?” Paige says, amused.
“Definitely not.” Azzi looks at the list of rules in her phone again, chewing on her lower lip. “Just like, should we sign something?”
Paige sighs heavily, and then holds out her fist, pinky finger extended. When Azzi doesn’t move, just looks at her, she wiggles the finger impatiently. “C’mon.”
“Just checking- Are you seven years old, by any chance?” Azzi asks, but holds out her pinky anyway.
Paige doesn’t respond, but her eyebrows furrow slightly in focus as she loops their pinkies and then touches their thumbs together. “There. Now we’ve pinky promised.”
Azzi wants to pull on this girl’s cheeks. She wants to chew on her cheekbones. She wants to take Paige’s face between her two hands, and pepper little kisses over her nose. “Yeah,” she says helplessly. “Pinky promise.”
Azzi shows up at the rink again the next day, late in the evening after practice, and Paige waves her over from a bench where she’s wrapping up her gear and stuffing it into a bag. She’s wearing the same expensive jacket Azzi had seen yesterday, and for the first time, Azzi wonders just how much Paige earns in a year. Their team is good, she knows that, so she imagines it’s a lot. Definitely more than she earns, Azzi thinks bitterly. Nobody so much as questions her approach as she makes her way over, making Azzi wonder what Paige told her team. They had never really discussed it, so she guesses it’s fine if they know that Azzi needed a fake girlfriend.
“What’s that face for?” Paige asks as she gets closer, so Azzi makes an even worse face, scrunching up all her features and sticking out her tongue.
“Gross,” Paige says, and she looks like she’s going to say more but Jana and Ice are both coming over, the two of them together creating an almost overwhelming whirlwind of energy. They don’t question Azzi’s presence at all, looking vaguely eager as they approach.
“Hi Azzi, Paige,” Ice says. “Are you coming out with us for drinks next week, Azzi?”
Azzi turns to Paige, who shrugs as if to say up to you.
“I might,” Azzi says, uncertainly, and in an effort to be nice, she adds, “sounds like a real party.”
“The last time I was at a party was when my sister got kidnapped,” Jana says thoughtfully and Azzi isn’t sure which part of that statement should be addressed first.
“What?” She settles on.
“It was a search party, obviously,” Jana amends. “Not like a ‘ha-ha’ party. We were all very worried.”
“Sorry,” Paige says, looking as dazed as Azzi feels. “Did you say your sister got kidnapped?”
“It was a misunderstanding!” Jana says brightly. “You know, KGB agents and stuff. She was alright in the end.”
“Good for her!” Ice says, evidently not bothered by this story at all.
As the pair leave, Azzi turns to Paige and mouths kidnapped? Paige shrugs helplessly.
“What did you tell them anyway?” Azzi asks once the two of them are out of earshot. “About like- this whole thing?”
“About you propositioning me?” Paige asks, and Azzi winces at the word choice. “Nothing. I was going to lie and say we were dating if someone asked, but no one’s asked.”
Azzi pauses. “You were going to lie to your teammates for me?” She asks, feeling strangely warm at the thought.
“I would’ve tried,” Paige says, grinning. “I think I overestimated how much attention they pay to their surroundings.”
She pats the spot on the bench next to her. “Are you getting back from practice?”
“Yeah,” Azzi says, sliding onto the bench, so that she’s straddling it, facing Paige, one leg on either side. “Mats today.”
Paige hums a questioning noise, her eyes still focused on the tape she’s wrapping around her stick.
“When you do like jumps and stuff,” Azzi shares, feeling strangely shy. “You have to practice somewhere you won’t get hurt as bad before you try on the ice.”
“Can you get the same effect?” Paige asks, seeming genuinely interested. “Like, isn’t it different on the mats versus the ice?”
Azzi is struck, just then, by how strange it is to be sitting here, talking to Paige like a normal person, explaining the details of figure skating to her like they’re friends.
“Um,” she says out loud. “Yeah, it’s different. But it helps to get the footwork down.”
Azzi keeps talking, feeling like she’s separating a little from his body as Paige keeps working on her equipment, nodding along at all the right places, asking questions when Azzi stops speaking.
When Jayden slams a hand down on her shoulder, it feels like a sharp and unwelcome return to reality.
“I thought I’d drop by, but you weren’t at the bus stop,” Jayden says, in a stupid long coat that makes him look like three children stacked on top of one another. Azzi frowns.
“Paige is driving me home today,” she says, and Jayden turns to look at Paige who’s briefly paused her work to observe their interaction.
“So this is the girlfriend, huh?” Jayden says brightly.
Azzi nods, and stands up, moving to stand behind Paige, nudging her back gently. She feels a little jittery already, and she mostly just wants Jayden to leave, to let Azzi return to the conversation she had been having before he arrived.
“We actually have to leave,” she announces, and she can see Paige start to place her equipment into her bag again, starting to pack up. “Sorry to ditch as soon as we see you.”
“I was just wondering,” Jayden says, ignoring this, “because you guys don’t seem very coupley at all. Not to judge, or anything.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Azzi says sharply. “What does ‘coupley’ even mean?”
Couple things, she thinks desperately, what are couple things?
Her smile beginning to twitch at the corners, she reaches down and very hesitantly places a hand on Paige’s shoulder. Her face immediately begins to burn, blood rushing upwards so fast she’s starting to feel dizzy. That was so fucking stupid.
Straight-faced, Paige reaches up and pats Azzi’s hand. Pats it. Once, twice, and stops, returning to her task.
Azzi isn’t sure whether she wants to laugh or cry. This is where their attempt at public displays of affection ends, apparently. Azzi slowly lowering her hand onto Paige’s shoulder like she’s touching a hot stove, and Paige patting that hand twice.
She looks down to see Paige’s face and Paige looks back up at her, and when their eyes meet, Azzi can see that for once, they’re in complete agreement. We are terrible at this.
Jayden doesn’t seem to miss the terrible awkward exchange (it would be like missing an especially bloody train wreck, in Azzi’s opinion), judging by the narrowed suspicious eyes he’s aiming at the two of them.
“Strange,” Jayden comments, casually, so casually. “Azzo normally goes for brunettes”
That is both underhanded and untrue. She does not go for brunettes. Azzi doesn’t “go for” many people at all at all. People go for her. They might as well just show up at her house and form an orderly queue.
Azzi is currently less worried about the slander of her reputation and more worried about whether Paige would get worked up and hit Jayden over this.
“Really?” Paige asks, tipping her head back to look at Azzi for confirmation.
“I don’t chase,” Azzi says lightly. “I attract.”
Paige rolls her eyes, not meanly- something Azzi could mistake as fond if she didn’t know any better. “Well, there you have it,” she tells Jayden.
“She doesn’t like hockey players much, either,” Jayden says, clearly still on this. This part, at least, is true.
“Are you trying to ask a question?” Azzi asks, her tone biting.
Jayden is not phased by Azzi’s biting tone. “Just seeing if she’s really up to your usual standards,” she says, and Azzi wouldn’t even blame Paige if she hit him for that one. Still, she tightens the hand on Paige’s shoulder in warning.
Azzi shouldn’t have worried because Paige doesn’t even blink, just lifts her eyebrows, slightly sardonic. “Are we having a dick measuring contest? I would've brought my ruler.”
“Not a contest,” Jayden says, that fake smile slipping off his face. “I was just asking some questions.”
Paige snorts, continuing to pack up her gear. “Ask away.”
“Ask away later,” Azzi says hastily. “Because we have to go right now. No time for an interrogation.”
“Not an interrogation, either,” Jayden says, sticking his chin in the air. “Alright, I’ll go. Give you two some privacy.”
He looks at the two of them as though she’s expecting them to tell him to stay. When nothing is forthcoming, he turns on his heel and strides away, hands tucked into the deep pockets of that flaring coat.
“Looks like fucking Vader in that thing,” Paige comments, swinging her bag over her shoulder. “Cartoon supervillain.”
They start walking towards the exit, the small musty hallway that leads into the parking lot.
“You handled that surprisingly well,” Azzi says. “I kind of expected you to hit him.”
Paige glances at her out of the corner of her eye, that familiar scowl on her face again. “I’m not that easy to piss off. It takes a little more than that to rile me up. Give me some credit.”
Azzi stares at her, mouth agape. “Are we talking about the same Paige? You’re so easy to rile up. Incredibly easy. It’s thrilling every time.”
Paige comes to a stop, and turns to point a thick finger at her chest. The two of them are standing alone in the dark hallway leading to the exit door, one dusty light bulb flickering on and off above them. The bruise on her face is turning a nasty colour, unlikely to fade for another week.
“You,” Paige says, squinting at her accusingly, “are just a special breed of irritating.”
With that, she turns and walks away, leaving Azzi standing still behind her, watching her retreating back.
“Was that a compliment?” Azzi yells after her, not moving from her spot. The sound of Paige’s answering laugh echoes off the walls, bouncing back towards her, Azzi’s lips pulling up in response, as she runs to catch back up.
“Wait,” Paige says, once they’re in the parking lot. Night has already fallen, early in the wintertime, the pavement around them lit up by tall streetlamps, casting yellow light over their faces. “Here, I’ll get in the passenger seat, and you drive.”
“Are you sure that’s safe?” Azzi asks, not moving.
Paige shrugs, already moving around to the passenger seat. “Come on, the lot is empty, I’ll teach you how.”
“Do you even know how?” Azzi asks, reluctantly accepting the keys Paige is proffering towards her, “I kind of figured that you just annoyed the test takers with your persistence until they let you pass.”
“Bruh,” Paige says mildly. “Go on, get in.”
Once Azzi’s sitting in the driver’s seat, she just stares at the wheel. There seem to be an awful lot of controls.
She turns to Paige. “What now?”
“Well, first you have to buckle your seatbelt,” Paige says, and Azzi scowls.
“I know that.” She doesn’t move.
Paige sighs. She seems to do that a lot around Azzi. Then Azzi is frozen for a different reason, as Paige leans over her, one hand gripping Azzi’s shoulder as she reaches for Azzi’s seatbelt, smooth muscle shifting under her skin as she brings it over Azzi’s body and buckles it.
“Dear god,” Azzi whispers. Paige smells good.
“Relax,” Paige says, taking her mumblings for nervousness. “You can’t possibly mess up that bad.”
Azzi frowns. “How do you know that? I could be the worst driver you’ve ever met.”
“I doubt it,” Paige tells her. “I crashed the car the first time I took the test.”
Azzi stares at her. Then she starts the car.
“Right pedal is gas, left is brake,” Paige says. “You have to put the car in reverse to get out of the spot, and then press lightly on the gas.”
“Right,” Azzi says, and moves the gear stick accordingly before pressing on the gas. The car lurches forward, coming to a jerky stop right before hitting the curb in front of them, Azzi’s blood draining entirely from her face.
“So, that was actually drive,” Paige says calmly, one hand braced on the window. “Reverse is lower.”
Once Azzi gets used to the controls, they manage to go in large bumpy circles around the parking lot.
“How did you fail the second time?” Azzi asks, carefully executing another terrible turn.
“Try to stay on the right side,” Paige says, unbothered by the possible damage Azzi is inflicting on her car. “I almost hit a stop sign. They got really mad about that one.”
“I would be making so much fun of you over this if I wasn’t so tense right now,” Azzi informs her. "Remind me to do it later."
“Looking forward to it- make sure you’re slowing down before you turn.”
“What about the third time?” Azzi says. She presses too hard on the brake, and the car nearly comes to a full stop in the middle of her next turn.
Paige seems to be pouting, by the sound of her voice. Azzi debates taking her eyes off the road long enough to check. “I waited almost a full year before taking it the third time. I practiced basically everyday. It went so well, the instructor was telling me I was one of the best drivers he’d tested that year.”
Azzi snickers. “And?“
“And on the way into the test center parking lot,” Paige says, “I hit the curb. Automatic fail. They wouldn’t even let me test at that center anymore, I had to go out of the city. Never trusted a driving instructor since.”
Azzi gives up on trying to hold back and bursts out laughing. To her surprise, the car doesn’t immediately crash.
“You’re laughing,” Paige says, and her face is stony, but Azzi can hear the smile in her voice. “I share my deep, personal, insecurities with you, and you’re laughing at me.”
Azzi shakes her head, small giggles still escaping her. “Those poor test administrators, you must have made them miserable.”
She can imagine it very easily, a smaller, angrier Paige, marching into a testing center with the energy of a Marine off to combat. The thought makes her snort with laughter.
“You look pretty when you laugh,” Paige says, and it’s that soft, honest voice, so rare to hear from her. Azzi’s laughter breaks off as she turns to look at her, captivated by that gentle sincerity, so unexpected from this girl, so sweet to hear.
“Az- the brakes!”
The car rolls over a curb and comes to a slamming halt right before a small tree, the branches brushing the windshield, leaves already fallen off in the winter cold.
She called me Az, she thinks, and presses her forehead into the steering wheel and smiles- a small giddy smile, just for herself
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Hi!! Love all the stuff you have on this blog!! I was wondering about your wrong parent AU, how would this change how the boys grow up, like with more of a motherly presence than their rat dad (though maybe she is just as a “sensei” as splinter…who knows XD) or is this like a time travel situation? AAA sorry im excited about this awesome AU!!!
Anywho, sorry for my ramblings I don’t write asks very often and there is no pressure to answer! Thanks so much for all the cool things you do! Lol I love seeing your stuff on my dash :D
It'd be a lot different! I guess I can list a few I thought of,,,
So, Rat!Mom.
She’s still a bit paranoid (how can you not be with the Shredder actively trying to find out what happened to you, where you are, and if you're actually dead), but shes more focused on trying to give her kids as normal of a life as she can and definitely not hiding all her stress underneath endless piles of work.
Mikey plays alot of games and is more adept at cooking, Raph's painting more often and always trying to help his mom with cleaning(yes, hes a mama's boy), Donnie is creating and creating and always wanting to go bigger, and Leo and Karai(yes, Karai :]) play fight alot(so many wars...) when they aren’t watching Space Heroes 24/7 or trying to explore outside the home.
Then, maybe during one of her dumpster dives, she finds some convenient "Chris Bradford" training tapes that they start to gain an interest in ninjutsu. She's not too pleased with it, but since they enjoy it, she tries to be more open to it(she conflicted)
They do go out and about earlier than Canon(with a curfew), meet April earlier too(her and her dad are a little different), and Karai and April become BFFS. (Unless...)
The kids still call her sensei or variations of mom, which ones? Probably all depending on what they did.
Now, fighting bad guys? She did not raise them for that /hj
In reality, when she sees her kids scratched up from fights topside, they are usually pretty quick to inform her what happened(except for two). They get carefully patched up, and scolded before being told to rest for a while(grounded). Which is definitely not so she can keep an eye on them.
And she is certainly not stressed whatsoever👍
Also…
“She was as beautiful as she was kind, and as kind as she was intelligent”
- Splinter
…probably meaning emotional intelligence, or somethin but i think itd be fun if she was just…. Fred.
As in Traps galore, I mean imagine it-
You're Chris Bradford, greatest actor (and martial artist ig) of all time, and your chasing what you presume to be your bosses stubborn former lover,(who you kind of hate ngl) and then you think you have her cornered, just for the ground to cave in beneath you cause whoops, she boobytrapped the whole place.
She can still be emotionally intelligent too, but the traps are staying.
Other than the traps, I do think Rat! Shen will have some other types of self-defense training during the time she was in hiding. Girl is not risking shit.
When it comes to VS. Shredder bits, she'd definitely use everything she can to her advantage, especially her rat abilities. Climbing, gnawing, scratching, hissing; just get the fuck away from her and her kids.
There’s no planned ships atm (other than Shen x Yoshi, but that's the point- hes ded anyway)
Lastly, Im thinking of probably at least three separate versions or “alternate timelines” for the WP au, or two divergents of the wp au canon lol. One where the original turts find Shen and her turts pre-adventure, one post-adventure and/or during the shredder kidnap arc(i will not elaborate) and the least timefuckery timeline where Rat mom and her babies gotta march on without future “assistance” 🤷 im sure they’ll be fine(they willllll)
Thank you all for being interested in this ^ ^ "
I actually don't have much planned for this since it was just another random idea(you can probably tell hdgdhdg), but I'm always happy to see everyone's ideas! It helps a lot with my scattered-brain--
And one FINAL, final thing
Im not sorry.
#tmnt#teenage mutant ninja turtles#wrote this while on melatonin 🎶#art#tmnt 2012#vinny asks#asks#wp au#wrong parent au#tmnt tang shen#tmnt 2012 tang shen#might change some bits later but these are random thoughts-#so#sketch#sketches#thanks for being patient with the asks😭#turns out it comes in rounds and i got whalloped into only making sketches 😵💫#ANYWAYS mental issues aside#Rat!mom has definitely taught her kids the way of the traps#and yes; shes gonna have alot of character development#if i can do that lmao
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I saw your Drabble ideas 🥵
What about Lance Stroll ( I know he has like 10 fans but stay with me) with a pregnancy/lactation kink 🥵🥵 he’s really been on my mind lately
AN: I'm ngl Im not really a Lance girlie but I loved writing this so I hope you guys love it too!
TW: MDNI 18+ Lacation/ pregnancy kink. nipple orgams
WC: 950+

Y/N POV
Being 8 months pregnant in the middle of an F1 season is not necessarily ideal but Lance is finally on summer break which means for the next two weeks we get to do nothing but relax in Montreal before he has to go back to work.
"I think I'm starting to produce," I comment while rubbing my sensitive boobs softly.
"Oh, really?" Lance says while walking towards me to meet me in the middle of the room. When he gets close enough he's already rubbing my very swollen belly.
"Ya, Ive leaked through a couple shirts already and it's only 2 in the afternoon," I whine getting frustrated with going through so much laundry.
"Just wear nothing than," Lance smirks while jokingly pulling at the end of the Aston Martin shirt I had thrown on. I jokingly send him a glare but when he leans down and places a soft kiss on my lips I kind of just melt into his touch.
"I'm mostly joking, but what about one of your nursing bras with some breast pads in them," Lance says softly while still rubbing soothing circles on my bump.
"I tried that earlier but the pads where rubbing against my nipples too much and it was making them too sensitive," I respond which only makes Lance look at me with a soft smirk.
"Sensitive huh?" Lance comments which makes me look at him with a raised brow.
"Bet I could make you cum with just a little bit of nipple play," Lance comments with a smirk knowing I've been extra horny since being pregnant and it really doesn't take much to cum for him anymore. But just nipple play? I doubt it plus I was leaking which would make it all too messy, which makes me shake my head at the thought but the thought of it has my pussy slightly throbbing.
"You're thinking about it aren't you?" Lance teases making me look him in the eye and nod softly. Lance takes this as his chance to softly pull my shirt over my head leaving my top half completely bare given I hadn't put a bra on after leaking through the first one.
As soon as the air hits my already sensitive nipples I can feel a bead of my milk pebble out making Lance look at it before gently rubbing his thumb over it making me whimper at the touch.
"Oh I'm gonna have you cumming in the next 10 minutes," Lance smirks when he seems how sensitive they really are. He brings up the thumb that's gently coded in my milk before bringing it up to his mouth and sucking it off making me grow red in embarrassment but when I see Lance close his eyes and enjoy the taste I can't help but grow weak in the knees.
"Tastes so good baby," Lance says softly while pushing me towards the bed and gently laying me down on my back while he climbs into the bed next to me.
"Look so fucking pretty like this," Lance keeps praising while rubbing my swollen bump before slowly bringing his hand up to my slightly leaking nipples.
"Oh fuck," I moan gently when Lance pinches my nipples making more milk leak out. I can feel the pleasure from my nipples going straight to my pussy.
I feel Lance start kissing my shoulder and slowly moving closer and to my nipples where he instantly latched his mouth onto my right nipple while still teasing my lift one.
"Mmmm, so good," Lance mumbles when he gets a weak stream of milk filling his mouth. While Lance is sucking on my right nipple he keeps playing with my left leaving me a whimpering mess under his touch.
"Lance," I moan softly when I feel myself really starting to dampen my panties wanting to touch myself.
"More Lance please," I whine trying to push Lance's hand towards the waistband of my pants but he keeps a firm pinch on my nipples making me whimper at the feeling.
"I said I was making you cum just by playing with your nipples," Lance says before leaning back down and taking my nipples back into his mouth while giving it a small bite knowing how much I love a little pain mixed with my pleasure.
I could tell that I really was gonna be able to cum like this if Lance kept playing with me like this.
"Shit, Lance," I moan when he keeps pinching my left nipple between his fingers making me whimper when he starts pulling at them while pinching.
"Lance," I whine a little louder when I feel myself nearly the edge of my orgasm which quickly has Lance shifting slightly so he can take my left nipple into his mouth and start pinching my right nipple instead making me gasps as I feel the milk in my left milk start to spray out slightly.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I start loudly moaning as I feel myself starting to fall over the edge.
Thats when Lance gently bites down on my nipple and tugs it's between his teeth while pinching and pulling my other nipple helping me ride out one of the more intense orgasms he has given me while pregnant.
"Oh! Lance," I cry as I relax into the waves of my orgasm.
Once I slowly start coming down from my orgasm Lance gently releases me nipples but brings his mouth back towards each one giving it a gently suck to help sooth any pain he might have caused.
"I'm not gonna lie, you taste divine," Lance says with a smile playing on his lips before he leans down and gives me a gently kiss on the lips.
-----------
The end! I hope you enjoyed!
#formula 1#f1 smut#formula 1 x you#f1 x you#formula one imagines#formula one smut#f1#formula 1 smut#f1 imagine#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 live#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 fic#formula one#f1 art#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 2024#formula one x oc#formula one x reader#formula one imagine#formula one x you#formula one fanfiction#formula one x y/n#f1 edit#f1 memes#f1 fandom
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I need.....I NEED MORE SAIKI K X READER SHEWAS SCSKSB
I have been feed well by your small serie of saiki kusos x write reader 🤤
But may I request as saiki kusos w f!s/o who suddenly have makoto as a stalker?
(sorry if you don't understand this my first time requesting 😭😭)
AHHH IM GLAD YOU ENJOYED THE SERIES!!
that’s actually a great idea!! I’m super pumped to do this request! :)
Don’t worry I know just what ya mean!
⚠️stalking warning,⚠️ before I start, if I may 😵💫
💛
Saiki will know right away when he starts stalking you-
And ngl this is the perfect chance to get rid of him 😈🙏
just kidding! But seriously, he let go of all the times makoto’s annoyed him in the past, but now that’s he’s an issue with you? His girlfriend? The one girl he can actually tolerate, scratch that, loves??
yeah no buddy this one’s not gonna slide
unfortunately he cant punch him bc 1) Saiki’s too strong and 2) that’d draw a lot of attention to himself since Makoto is a celebrity
but what he can do?? Well, Plan A) pinch his cheeks till they hurt and threaten him, Upgraded Plan A) disguise himself then pinch his cheeks, Plan B) keep scaring the crap out of him every time he tries to follow you, Plan C) calmly talk it out with him that you two are an item, Plan D) tell Teruhashi and use her love for Saiki to his advantage, getting her to tell her parents and stop her brother, Plan E) Publicly expose that freak or Plan F) tell you you have a stalker if you haven’t noticed, and if you have, go to the police
wow! what well thought out plans! :) most of them won’t work
heres why!
upgraded plan A is better than just plan A but it will ultimately still draw attention
plan c is unlikely to work seeing as though how creepy that guy is, plus he doesn’t like Saiki
As of plan d Teruhashi can hardly stop him from being a creep to HER (😭⁉️) and i don’t know how well the parents will care, especially if he’s making them money..😟
plan e….seems like it would be successful..buuut i feel he would just use his celebrity status to will the evidence away, like speaking out about how he would “never” do that and doing charity 🙄 plus the fan girls probably won’t believe some rando who uploads that on the internet over they’re fav 😒
ngl plan F is really reasonable and has one of the highest chance of working, but yet again, the celebrity card will strike and he could pay off the police so they don’t do crap abt it 🤦♀️😑
therefore! Plan B it is! Seems the most likely to work + Saiki can get his revenge in a practically harmless way! :3
Thanks to his powers (for once 😭) no one is likely to believe even the Makoto when he says a flying guy dropped a pile of dog crap on him 😏🤷♀️
and even if they did when he tries to explain the full story he’ll have to keep lying to keep the lie of him not stalking you alive 👎
but he still will tell you if your unaware tho!
he’s likely gonna be hesitant if he knows you’ll freak about abt it but you deserve to know. And ofc he can always keep you safe (thanks magic powers, for being useful for once!) but he also would want your parents to know so if Makoto tries something they can have a lead.
so yes ultimately he tells you, likely at his house, in his room, and he tries to break it to you as gently as possible but…there’s no easy way to take that kind of info 😬😟
if you get scared or cry he’ll tell you his plan to make him leave you alone, and he tells you to tell your parents too. Essentially trying to console you
if you choose to trust him and react a bit calmer, maybe still worried, he’d ask if you still wanna go out in public knowing this, and if yes he’ll accompany whenever and wherever he can, especially since Makoto won’t wanna come up to you while he’s there, thinking Saiki’s your boyfriend
he is
Also If Makoto does anything perverted as far as taking sus pictures of you or imagining weird things with those photos he’ll rip them up and make the paper and random things fly around in his room, every time
He probably breaks his phones/cameras too, even if he buys knew ones, as punishment
onto the final battle!
let’s say your walking home from school and Makoto is following you, your boyfriend is close behind you both, monitoring the situation for a good chance to strike. First, you cross the railroad to get home, but Makoto has to fall back so you don’t see him, but when it’s his turn to go? Oh no! The trains coming! Where’d that even come from? there was no train?! CRAP!- huh? Wait..the trains gone..thank goodness?! 😭
oh wait! He needs to catch up to you! Well at least he knows where you live and what route you take through research! He needs to catch up! HOLY CRAP! What’s a mob doing here?! Did a fan see him?? How’d they find him..no way, don’t tell me they’re gonna find out what he’s doing..NO DONT COME ANY CLOSer…? They’re running past him? Well I guess he is in disguise..wait, they were running to this arch nemesis and top competition?! 😠 seriously?! That guy over him??
he proceeds to head over there to show the ladies who they should really be drooling over 😏 WAIT- HE CANT REVEAL HIMSELF RIGHT NOW?!- what?…where’d his wig go? THE WIND BLEW IT OFF?! HOLY- HE’S ABOUT TO GET FOUND OUT🫨 RUN 😭 🏃
aw man he’s outta breath, what are the odds the wind would blow his wig off near a mob of fans?! Now he’s gotta be extra careful following you! And it’s already late! Actually..it’s pretty darn dark….dang it! You’re probably in your house by now! Oh well…maybe you still have your window open and he can get some pictures that way! 👍
uh..is he starting to hear a second pair of footsteps..? But..no one’s around..why’s it getting louder..?! UH, it’s getting more aggressive now 😥….okay that’s it! he’s running..!
dang it! It’s chasing him! No way he can lead this creep to your house! (Ironic huh) he’s gotta take a wrong turn!
man! What time is it?! Midnight?! Has he really been running that long??? Why’s this freak still chasing him? And who is it?!?
alright! He’ll take a turn into that alley and lose ‘em! Then he’ll make a ‘U’ back to your house! Although there’s no way to be sure if your still up or not :/
hey! The footsteps are gone! Maybe think he lost him! Alright! He’ll take another turn and go back to your place!
🏃🏃
right as he turns the corner?
Saiki:👹
Jump scare!
he immediately calls his manager while running away, thinking he’s either a mass muderer, a demon or a stalker! 😱
and the best part is? Nobody will believe him 😊
ngl Saiki probably won’t let this slide even a couple days after he finds out Makoto’s stalking you, he’s quick to act and stop him bc no.
Super Saiki to your rescue! 🦸🤩😎
Ngl you’re beautiful so I see what Makoto sees in you but…..dude. Don’t stalk your crush.
🌸💐🌺
hope you enjoyed your hcs! -Brook
#anime#anime and manga#luffyvace#anime headcanons#fluff#fluff headcanons#saiki k#saiki k headcanons#the disastrous life of saiki k.#kusuo saiki#saiki#saiki kusuo#saiki kusuo no psi nan#saiki no psi nan#the disastrous life of saiki k#saiki x reader#saiki headcanons#saiki k x reader#tdlosk#saiki k fandom#x reader#fem reader#x female reader#tw stalking#tw stalker
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little dove (anakin skywalker x reader angst)
a/n: hi! welcome to my first anakin fic! i saw that he won the poll so im ngl i hit the bowl and closed my eyes for a second and now we have this!!! this was originally based off a prompt: "why are you lying to me?" and it ended up taking me about four days to complete this! i really really hope you guys enjoy this! this has become my favorite piece i've ever written. lmk if you'd like to see more <3 warnings: f!reader, angst, swearing, padmé is NOT nice in this, god forgive me i'm so sorry padmé. it hurt my heart to write her in such a way lowkey , forbidden romance, broken promises,
masterlist
w/c:8.5k
“little…dove?”
“i think it suits you. don’t you realize the symbolism of doves?”
“i’m afraid that i don’t, master.”
“to me, my young padawan, you represent peace, love, and freedom: some things i’m afraid the galaxy is lacking.”
—
y/n was laying on anakin’s lap and feeding him grapes on her balcony, the duo basking in the sun’s warmth together. neither one spoke, more than comfortable in the silence of each other. their shared time together had become habitual, but only recently did the pair realize that they felt more towards each other, more than simply padawan and master.
the sun shined brightly through anakin’s hair, the sun illuminating his blond curls and almost making them appear golden. streaks of sunshine broke through anakin’s loose curls, highlighting y/n’s beautiful e/c eyes in the bright sunshine. y/n lost herself in the jedi’s features for a moment, unable to form any other coherent thoughts besides wow, entirely unaware that anakin was thinking the same about her.
"what? is something on my face?" his voice a low rumble, disturbing y/n from her reverie, that signature smirk of his spread wide across his cheeks. she only smiled warmly in reply before speaking,
"beauty." it was y/n’s turn to smirk now, at the sight of anakin's cheeks flushing pink right before her eyes. it was the cutest thing y/n had ever seen and she wanted to be sure to commit the sight to memory. “you’d think the almighty chosen one would recognize my honesty through the force,” y/n teased, lightly prodding anakin’s chest, still adjusting to his new uniform.
anakin leaned down and kissed y/n’s hand that held the grapes softly, before stealing the grape from her fingers with his lips, eliciting a soft giggle from the padawan. “I think you might be feeling under the weather if you truly believe that,” anakin teased back lightheartedly.
a familiar sequence of beeps and boops interrupted y/n before she could reply, watching as the droid that was always at anakin’s side approached the two from inside the woman’s quarters. it had been on y/n’s to do list to commit herself to fluently learning binary, but alas, she once again had to turn to her master for the translation of what r2 said, just as always.
with a loud groan, anakin’s head dropped and his body nearly folded in half, his arms wrapping around y/n tighter so as to not knock her over from the sudden influx of weight she had to bear. based on his annoyance, y/n frowned and finally replied,
“you’re being summoned again, aren’t you?” y/n spoke, the frown on her face only deepening upon noticing anakin’s subtle nod. she pushed the jedi upward off herself, sitting up to give him a tight hug. she forced herself to smile hopefully as she spoke, reaching a hand up to push a stray, golden curl behind his ear, “will i see you later?”
“of course you will, my little dove. i’ll be back before you even know it, then we can have a lovely dinner together before evening training.” anakin promised before he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead, his gloved, metal hand on the back of her head to maintain some semblance of intimacy as long as he could. y/n closed her eyes and enjoyed anakin’s presence while she had it, leaning into his touch.
“i hate having to hide how much i love you, ani.” y/n said dejectedly, hoping that she'd finally be able to hear the words from him. anakin starting to rub the apples of her cheeks in a soothing manner, his gaze softening as the pad of his thumb continued to rub comforting circles on y/n’s cheek. the nickname she’d created for him made his heart skip a beat, his smile only widening.
“i promise you’ll see me later, okay?” y/n reluctantly motioned to stand with a soft nod, watching as her master stood. anakin extended his hand to help y/n stand, the woman gladly taking any opportunity to touch her secret lover and master.
y/n tugged anakin down by his shoulders, her hands resting on his new armor. she let her fingers run over the plate, in awe of anakin and his achievements. he never failed to disappoint or surprise her.
“i don’t think i ever had the chance to tell you, but i’m so proud of you for becoming a general, master. i knew you could do it. i can’t wait for what’s to come.” y/n said, a warm smile across her face despite how sad she was to see him leave. she let her hands rest on the armor for a minute, her eyes meeting his. she looked into those bright blue eyes of his, feeling herself melt into a puddle at that gaze, the one reserved for her.
anakin only smiled, pulling y/n into his arms, holding her tight—-so tight that it seemed like she would float away if he let up in the slightest. y/n pulled away slightly to hold the general’s face in her hands, connecting his lips with her own.
—
y/n was in her bedroom, pacing back and forth anxiously. even when he couldn’t immediately return to her, she always heard when anakin left and returned from missions, whether it was through 3po, r2, or gods, even obi-wan! it was driving her more than a little insane crazy that it was deep into the hours of the early morning and she’d heard nothing from her anakin. he promised that’d he’d be back in time to have a nice dinner with her before their nightly training, yet here she was, pacing back and forth, alone, in the darkness of her quarters.
the walls felt suffocating, as if she were confined in them. y/n felt her master’s presence on the planet, but she hadn’t heard from him. was he hiding from me? she couldn’t stop the anxious thoughts that had begun to swirl in her mind and abdomen, anxious nausea filling her body. no. she reminded herself, closing her eyes to steady her thoughts. she forced herself to remember her training, how to balance emotions as they came and letting them go before they fester after acknowledgment. it was beyond difficult and her optimism was starting to lose its spark, despite her hopeful nature wanting to assume this was simply anakin testing her. she was fighting herself to not spiral, which was seeming to be a difficult battle for the young padawan.
arguably, the worst part of being in a secret relationship with anakin was how y/n could never openly be his. she could never be whisked away on dates, never be kissed or hugged in public, she would only ever be viewed as general anakin skywalker’s padawan. she was a secret as far as she was concerned. the anxious thoughts continued to violate her mind before a memory from before she began her training with the general hit the back of her eyelids,
“y/n, trust me! being my lady in waiting would be so much fun! you wouldn’t have to do anywhere near as much as you’d think! you could leave behind all the fighting and rough housing, you could live lavishly with me! can’t you imagine how great it would be to have an official position next to your best friend? especially as a force-sensitive person, oh you’d be perfect, a force to be reckoned with.” padmé held y/n’s hands tightly, her eyes searching her best friend’s for what emotion she was feeling. “can’t you just imagine it?!” the older encouraged excitedly, her grip on y/n’s hands tightening ever so slightly before her expression faltered at the sight of y/n not sharing her reaction. “i’ve gathered more of an understanding of how things work after a full term as queen, and y/n, i feel you would really thrive by my side.”
“padmé, it’s not that i don’t wish to be your lady in waiting, really, I think it’d be grand, but, how i wish you’d asked me just a day sooner. as of yesterday, i’ve been invited to become general skywalker’s padawan.” y/n admitted, the excitement in her eyes prompting a storm of emotion in the queen. but, instead of speaking her mind, like she always did, padmé decided to withhold her true opinion, unbeknownst to her best friend. the queen forced a smile, remembering the day she’d met skywalker as a padawan, the day her own life had changed and he had stolen her heart.
jealousy coursed through the queen’s blood for the first time in her life. she’d never envied anyone, nor had she ever acted in her own self interest. it almost hurt her to be jealous of y/n, someone she’d known longer than she’d been queen of naboo, her childhood best friend. padmé’s mind raced with thoughts she knew she shouldn’t have had and instead of stopping them, for once, she let herself be selfish and indulge in them.
“wow, y/n! i’m so excited for you! the general is truly one of the most lovely jedi i’ve ever met. you’re going to become one of the strongest there are, especially at anakin’s side!” padmé wrapped her arms around y/n, her grip similar to that of a fully grown python. “i’m so proud of you, y/n/n.”
y/n smiled, squeezing the queen back tightly, relieved that her friend wasn’t upset at her. “ to tell you the truth, i’m ecstatic about this opportunity. thank you for being so understanding about this, padmé.” y/n spoke, her relief palpable. the queen’s grip only tightened at her thanks, a smirk making its way onto her face as she rested her chin on y/n’s shoulder.
“you have nothing to thank me for, y/n. i promise.”
as the memory faded away from the forefront of her mind, y/n had half a mind to close her eyes and let the force guide her to anakin, but as soon as the thought crossed her mind, the door swung open to reveal just the man who had been consuming her every waking hour, thoughts, and feelings.
“maker, anakin, i was so worried about you.” y/n approached her master, extending her arms in the direction of him for a hug. the general happily indulged in the contact, pulling y/n into his warm arms. she fought the urge to nuzzle her face into his chest, letting his presence alone soothe her anxiety.
“you’re shaking.” anakin observed, pulling away slightly to look into his padawan’s e/c eyes, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. it was his own quiet way of telling her he expected an answer to his statement. he was worried, y/n could gather that much from his tone.
“i just missed you is all,” y/n answered a little quicker than she intended, hoping her master wouldn’t catch onto how she’d already had an answer prepared for his question.
“your words tell me one thing, yet your body language defies you. why are you lying to me, y/n?” anakin asked, nudging her chin with his forefinger and thumb, her chin balanced in the empty space in between his fingers to make her look him in the eye. his words extracted the breath in her lungs, y/n’s head hanging in shame as she realized she was caught.
“what happened tonight? why were you so late? what about our plans?” y/n fought the tremble in her voice, though she wanted nothing more than for anakin to hold her close and reassure her as she fell apart in those strong arms of his.
guilt cast over anakin’s face like a shadow, “i’m so sorry, little dove. i was escorting the queen to a…” hearing the first half of anakin’s explanation sent a wave of nausea through y/n’s body. it seemed as of lately, her best friend wanted nothing to do with her, and only her master. it made her feel sick to her stomach, especially because padmé had reassured y/n that nothing was going on between the two of them, and the girl still felt this bothered by it.
but, she saw the way padmé looked at him. it was the same way y/n looked at anakin. but, she said nothing. its not like she would jeopardize her second term as queen, just for him, right? y/n was anxious, she was only falling victim to her emotions, right? anakin would remain loyal to her, there was no way he wouldn’t.
right?
“hey.” there was anakin’s sweet voice again, ringing through the chaos of her mind, the only thing she could see and hear clearly, “tell me what’s on your mind.” anakin leaned down a bit, trying to catch y/n’s dancing gaze before ultimately sighing quietly and tilting her head to look into his eyes again.
“you left me all alone, no contact. i could feel that you were here on the planet, why didn’t you immediately tell me when you came back like always? you were late, its early morning now, and you promised to be home before dinner and our lesson. can you really blame me for being so upset, anakin?” y/n gently breathed through her emotions, remembering her training despite her anxious and heavy heart. she pulled away from anakin’s touch, electing to cross her arms over her chest instead.
the general took a step forward, grabbing y/n’s wrist and tugging her forward, spinning her into his arms before he leaned in and cupped y/n’s face. he rested his forehead against her own, his free hand on her waist, “i’m sorry for being late, my love. will you let me make it up to you?” he whispered sweetly to her, placing gentle kisses all over her face. “let me make you something to eat, then i’m all yours for the rest of the day. i promise.” anakin ran his hand through her hair gently, being careful to not tug on her hair too harshly as he awaited her answer. y/n almost melted at the action, closing her eyes for a moment to enjoy the calming sensation. after a few moments, before she let herself be lulled to sleep while standing, y/n finally conceded,
“fine. but make my favorite.”
—
“what do you mean you’re stepping down from a third term? padmé, the people are advocating to change the law for you to be allowed a third term–” y/n asked her best friend in disbelief, her brows knitted together tightly as she processed what padmé was saying.
“i mean, that i feel like i’d be more helpful to my people if i were involved in more of the political side of things,” she answered, her tone unnecessarily rude. it almost startled y/n, as padmé was hardly ever short with her. but then again, y/n had noticed that the nature of their relationship started to change when she had become anakin’s padawan. but there was no way that was the reason their over ten year long friendship was rocky, absolutely no way at all.
y/n reminded herself of her training once more. only siths deal in absolutes, the words of master obi-wan kenobi as fresh in her mind as the day he’d drilled them into her brain, over two years ago: an off-the-cuff comment the day she was inducted as general skywalker’s padawan.
“what’s wrong, padmé? i feel you and i have been drifting apart, especially as of your last term. you never talk to me anymore, are you okay?” y/n asked, her tone concerned as she placed a gentle hand on the queen’s senator’s shoulder, the worry in her gaze evident. y/n’s worry was soon replaced with shock and a lightning strike to the heart as she watched padmé’s previously neutral expression be overtaken with disgust at y/n’s touch.
the padawan dropped her hand as if she had been burnt from padmé’s shoulder and she forced her heart to harden. the woman stiffened as padmé finally answered her question, “perhaps we simply don’t fit into each other’s lives anymore.” padmé being uncharacteristically rude and distrusting became something y/n could no longer bear. the pain of her friendship with padmé splintering became unignorable.
“what? what are you talking about? where is this coming from?!” y/n’s eyes were widened in shock at padmé’s ‘explanation’ of her sudden coldness towards her. “padmé, this doesn’t even make sense, talk to me like we’re still those little girls picking flowers in the garden together!” y/n pleaded, taking a timid step towards her childhood friend. the poor padawan sounded like she was close to tears, a heart-wrenching contrast to the queen who wore a blank slate as her expression.
padmé only remained silent, taking a step back as y/n attempted to close the distance in between them. y/n could feel her heart shattering into smaller and smaller pieces as padmé drowned her in the sound of silence. the young padawan let her hurt fester in her chest for a moment or more, storing the pain deep inside her mind as she’d be able to use it later in her training, hating that she had to treat the loss of her life long friend as a lesson.
“p-padmé…? are you not even going to say anything at all?”
y/n couldn’t take the silence anymore, regretting all the times she’d taken her friendship with padmé for granted. after a moment, y/n finally offered a simple, single nod to padmé.
“right, then. i can clearly sense you’ve made up your mind about this. i don’t know what i did to you, or what i could’ve possibly said, but, i wish you well, padmé. i hope we can one day fix this.” with that, y/n left padmé’s room, blinking back tears that begged to be set free from the prison that were y/n’s tear ducts.
later, y/n found herself in the training room, a bead of sweat starting to form at the edges of her scalp as she practiced using the force on the heaviest weights in the room. she’d been training for nearly an hour now, and once again, anakin was nowhere to be found. she checked his quarters, the council room, and not even the council knew where he was. reluctantly, back she traversed to the training room, electing to do something useful with her time instead of anxiously pacing around her quarters for hours at a time again.
she couldn’t even stay focused on her exercises, anakin’s absence weighing on her heavier than she was comfortable admitting. for a moment, she’d zoned out, staring at the tan wall across from her as images of her and padmé growing up together raced through her mind at several miles per hour. y/n felt a strike through her chest at the loss of padmé, letting out a loud grunt as she force pulled the weights about an inch in front of her foot from across the large training room. y/n let out a noise of disbelief, shocked at her new achievement. momentarily forgetting she was the only one present in the room, she grinned and turned around. disappointment washed over her in waves, the weight heavy enough to hold her down on the ground. her master wasn’t there, he hadn’t seen how much she had been improving.
anakin sighed, annoyance starting to spread through his body. of course, last minute, as he was on his way to train with y/n, master yoda had summoned him to the council room. he entered to see mace windu, yoda, and queen padmé present. “what’s going on here? why was I summoned?” the young general asked, fully aware of the fact that he was now running late. he hoped to the force that y/n would forgive him this time.
“there has been an attempt on queen amidala’s life.” mace windu’s words resulted in anakin narrowing his eyes. the jedi’s eyes found the queen’s, surprised to find her already looking at him. anakin’s eyes found master windu’s again,
“i see...but what does that-” anakin’s question was cut short as master windu spoke over him,
“it means you are assigned to be the queen’s bodyguard until further notice. you are to tell no one where you’re going, nor are you allowed to tell anyone your mission. the less who know, the better.” anakin’s eyes widened at the thought of being separated from y/n, his heart starting to race,
“surely my padawan will be invited along so i can continue her training in the meantime, right? and besides, she and the queen are lifelong friend-” queen amidala interrupted anakin this time, another wave of displeasure washing over him at the constant interruptions,
“we are not,” anakin took notice of padmé’s tone, not liking it one bit. he thought of how y/n would speak of padmé, her attitude not matching y/n’s kind descriptions of her. once again, he narrowed his eyes,
master yoda spoke now, anakin’s heart sinking at his words, “your padawan, continue her training with master obi-wan she will. worry, you must not, in good hands will she be." anakin wanted to argue but he knew it would only push him further from his end goal. with a sigh, he turned to padmé once more,
“tell me what happened in the attempt.” anakin crossed his arms over his broad chest, not even bothering to hide his obvious displeasure over his new assignment. he had to find a way to communicate with y/n before she thought he was abandoning her and forgetting about her again.
padmé seemed to be caught off guard by anakin’s demand, obvious from the way her breath caught in her throat and the way her eyes widened ever so slightly. the queen cleared her throat delicately before speaking, “well...i was in my bed room and i saw someone aiming at me with a blaster through the window.”
“that’s it…? nothing actually happened and now i'm being given the task of protecting you-?”
“watch your tone and remember who exactly you’re speaking to, young skywalker,” windu spat angrily, shaking his head at anakin’s blatant disrespect of the queen. anakin sighed loudly at the correction, rubbing his temples as he processed what was being said to him. he finally snapped his head up after a moment,
“when do we leave? can i at least tell my padawan that i-” yet another interruption, causing anakin to nearly roll his eyes. nobody ever let him express himself, not like y/n did, and quite frankly he was growing tired of it.
“you both leave tonight, we on the other hand will let your padawan know of your surrender of her training.” windu groaned, annoyed that like always, the young skywalker questioned everything instead of a simple nod and ‘yes, master.’ anakin’s eyes widened at windu’s words,
“i can’t have her thinking i willingly abandoned her.” his brows furrowed, his body growing more and more tense. “you’ll let me at least say goodbye…” he trailed off, almost surprised he hadn’t been interrupted this time.
“i think it would only benefit you to remember that jedi are not to form attachments to anyone, general. not even their own padawan.” mace windu’s words were a warning, or maybe a challenge, anakin thought to himself, before simply turning around and storming off towards the doors of the council room. “anakin!” mace windu called after him, soon realizing it was to no avail as the young jedi only continued to walk towards the door faster with no intentions of turning around.
padmé followed after anakin, lifting her dress to jog after him. as she approached him, they exited the doors together. anakin still hadn’t turned to look at padmé until they were at their assigned ship. something felt wrong about this whole thing, but then again, when didn’t anakin question the choices of others around him?
anakin stepped into the ship padmé led him to, his mind racing as he thought of y/n, closing his eyes in an attempt to communicate with y/n through the force. as soon as he felt y/n’s energy, the ship started to take off. his eyes shot open to the sight of padmé having booted up the ship, immediately noticing she typed in the coordinates to naboo.
“hey, wait a minute, I wasn’t ready yet!” anakin argued before he realized the ship was moving already, just slightly out of range of his padawan now. it almost seemed like something was trying to keep anakin and y/n apart. anakin swore he could feel it and he suppressed a growl,
“padmé.” anakin spoke her first name, “i told you I wasn’t ready yet.” with an annoyed sigh, padmé turned to anakin,
“well, maybe if you hadn’t stormed out of the council room like that, you would’ve heard that naboo is expecting us within the hour. why are you acting like this, ani? you’re never this disagreeable about an assignment.” padmé said with a frown, her gaze attempting to peer into the windows of anakin’s soul. with a scoff, anakin broke eye contact before shaking his head, the use of y/n's nickname for him for once igniting an angry blaze within his heart, disgust etching itself across his face,
“don’t look at me like that. i don’t like it, not one bit.” anakin insisted, ignoring padmé’s question. "and don't call me that, that isn't what i go by to you." a war was raging inside anakin’s mind, several smaller battles creating a mass conflict inside him. he felt like he was going to explode any minute.
he worried for his young padawan, he knew exactly how this was going to look to her and he despised it. he was furious he couldn’t explain to her what was going on, he could only imagine how much this was hurting her.
the thought that someone had found out about his and y/n’s secret caused him to stiffen before he forced himself to relax. he’d been on several missions protecting padmé as of recently, and before today he almost considered them friends.
anakin let his thoughts encase y/n, his lovely padawan. he hadn’t yet noticed that the queen was staring at him. his heart stung from the lack of y/n, his right side cold without her. he refused to tell padmé his feelings, he couldn’t. sure, his new assignment was to protect padmé, but his first priority was to keep y/n safe. he knew they’d both be forced into exile if anyone were to ever find out about their secret relationship, and that was anakin's worst nightmare.
padmé hated the silence she was met with and thought of some way, any way she could break through the jedi’s walls, get him out of his head and pay attention to her. padmé could tell what, or rather, who was on anakin’s mind, “if this is about me interrupting you earlier, i'm sorry. y/n and I had just gotten into a terrible fight shortly before you had arrived, my mind has been everywhere and nowhere all at once.” she spoke with an anxious chuckle. to her satisfaction, anakin finally looked her in the eyes at the sound of y/n’s name,
“what happened? is she alright?” anakin asked, his worry for y/n only growing. there it was, anakin’s weak spot, y/n.
“she’s been so different lately,” padmé lied, forcing a sad expression as she spoke about the woman she’d began to resent, “i’m sure its that man she’s been around lately, but she wouldn’t even listen to me, her childhood best friend!” anakin’s heart stopped at padmé’s words,
“what?” was all anakin could muster in reply, nausea rising into his stomach and chest. “what man?” anakin said almost bitterly, tasting the bile in the back of his throat.
a look of shock crossed padmé’s features as she covered her mouth, as if she could take back the words that she had already spoken, “she wouldn’t tell me who, but...she had mentioned to me that when she wasn’t with you or me, she was with him.” anakin almost vomited from padmé’s truth, having to force himself to take deep breaths.
anakin didn’t know how much time passed until padmé landed the ship, his eyes finally refocusing on the sight ahead of him, naboo.
—
“no, I refuse to believe that. anakin w-wouldn’t have left without at least saying goodbye, or telling me. something had to have happened.” y/n shook her head, unbelieving of the news she was being told. frostbite exploded across her chest, the warmth of shame and the icy truth of betrayal prominently battling within her, a moment’s weakness reminding her of the secret she had been forced to be, forced to keep. she felt like her heart was being ripped out of her chest.
mace windu narrowed his eyes at the young padawan, “master skywalker, for your information, has surrendered responsibility of you to master obi-wan,” he extended his hand to the side where obi-wan sat, a much less jovial than normal tone as he greeted y/n with his usual,
“hello, there.” he waved awkwardly, deciding for himself to take over the explanation from mace, knowing it would be less harsh of an explanation to y/n if he told her himself. he took a step forward to be closer to y/n’s line of sight, “don’t fret, young one. this wasn’t due to anything you may or may not have done, you can relax. i can almost feel your fear,” obi-wan said lightheartedly, accompanied by a chuckle in an attempt to soothe the padawan’s nerves. “this was a decision made by the council, as anakin was sent away on a new assignment.” obi-wan’s eyes were soft and caring as he spoke, worried for the younger jedi in training, noticing her extreme upset.
obi-wan noticed she had little to no reaction at his attempt at a joke and he turned to windu, a nod in his direction, “anakin had told me of the plans he had for y/n’s training, i'd like to get a head start on that if you wouldn’t mind, master windu,” obi-wan watched as he mulled over the thought momentarily before waving the two off,
“you’re both dismissed.” as master windu spoke, y/n flipped around and stormed toward the door, the resemblance of her master’s actions mere hours prior not lost on him. windu clenched his fists before standing up from his seat and turning away to look out the window.
the doors to the council room flew open with a nod of y/n’s head as she channeled the force to swing the doors for her. obi-wan quickly gained on her, following her back to her quarters, “i don’t get it obi-wan,” y/n let out dejectedly, before he placed a hand on her shoulder,
“quiet now. we shall discuss this in private.” obi-wan communicated through the force, the sensation almost foreign to her, only used to this form of communication with anakin’s voice on the other side. y/n stiffened, only nodding gently. her fists were clenched by her sides and obi-wan pretended not to notice as he took the lead, walking them towards y/n’s quarters. together they entered, obi-wan shutting the door behind him as he entered her living space.
“so, what happened?” y/n asked, her words flying from her mouth before she could stop them, “why did he leave? where did he go?” y/n’s heart hadn’t stopped burning since she’d found out, the loss of anakin weighing heavily on her mind and body.
“the council seems to have sent him away on a mission to protect the queen. there was an attempt on her life. so with anakin, the queen is hiding on a different planet until we find who attempted to bring her harm.” obi-wan explained, his gaze sympathetic, “i know you’re upset because your training is going to be different now, perhaps you even thought it would be halted until anakin came back--”
you couldn’t be more wrong about what i'm thinking, master. y/n thought to herself.
“your abilities came to you later than most.” obi-wan spoke, his hands folded together in front of him. it was true, y/n hadn’t realized she were a force sensitive individual until she was roughly fourteen. despite that though, she’d always been playing games in the garden with sticks as weapons, pretending she was a jedi. it was what padmé was referencing when she told y/n she wouldn’t have to fight anymore, when she had been invited to be padmé’s lady in waiting.
with a single nod, y/n looked up at obi-wan, waiting for him to continue, “well, young padawan, come with me. the next part of your training comes now, as per request of anakin himself.” her eyes lit up,
“anakin’s request…? have you spoken with him? is he okay?” y/n forced her voice to remain steady despite her frazzled state, why hasn’t he reached out to me? y/n thought hopelessly.
“anakin’s fine. though, he is far more worried about his little padawan rather than the queen,” obi-wan said with a smile, clapping y/n on the shoulder, “he’s just fine, as is the queen. he wanted me to apologize on his behalf for being unable to explain his circumstances, but to trust him and me, and everything will be alright.”
the pit in her stomach that accompanied her anxieties returned in full force at the thought of anakin no longer being her master, and the fact that padmé’s life was threatened after their big fight. y/n hoped and prayed to the force for her emotions to stop warring within her. upon seeing the distress on her young face, obi-wan gently took her wrists in his own,
“y/n, you must relax. your emotion is radiating off you in waves. calm down, he’s going to come back after this assignment and be your master again, he promises.” obi-wan smiled at her reassuringly, “now come with me, the next step in your training comes now.” y/n’s brows furrowed in confusion and maybe a little worry,
“the next step? master obi-wan, what’re you-hey!” obi-wan only kept walking towards her door and out of her quarters. the young girl chased after him, following behind him quietly. y/n called after him again from the base of his ship before she walked up the ramp, following him inside “master obi-wan!”
obi-wan finally turned to face y/n now, inviting her to take a seat. for once, she followed orders without questioning them and sat down next to obi-wan as he began to start up the ship, “tell me, y/n, have you ever been to the planet lotho minor?”
her brows furrowed at obi-wan as the spacecraft lifted off, flying towards the sky and away from coruscant, “lotho...minor? the wreck planet?” y/n asked, perplexed as to why the planet was relevant. “never. master anakin always told me that only crazy people would go there, that’s where most, including naboo would leave their waste. why? what’s going on, obi-wan?”
“well, your master had plans to bring you there himself, as no one would visit to disturb you, but unfortunately since plans changed, now i'll be bringing you there myself.” y/n wasn’t sure she approved of this, only trying to focus on the fact that this was what anakin had planned for her next.
obi-wan and she didn’t really talk much during the ride there, mainly because obi-wan hadn’t known how to talk to the padawan, really. as obi-wan landed the craft, he then finally turned to y/n, “how have you been enjoying your training? has anakin been good to you?” from the tone of his voice, y/n could tell that he was being lighthearted, trying to get a smile out of her. y/n smiled and nodded softly in response,
“yeah. he’s always been great, in all senses of the word. i never realized how much i was ignorant of, he’s taught me so much.” y/n allowed herself to gush over him, glad that someone had finally given her a reason to praise her master in a respectful manner. obi-wan smiled, finally having something to talk about with his apprentice’s padawan.
“you should be careful when you use words like ‘never’ and ‘always’, padawan. things are rarely so absolute. you should be more precise. clarity of mind is important for a jedi.” obi-wan lectured her.
y/n mentally groaned before obi-wan spoke again, “yes, yes, i know only sith deal in absolutes,” must everything be a lesson? she thought to herself
with a nod, obi-wan folded his arms behind him, “come on now, young one. we have things to do, things to learn,” he barely gave y/n a chance to reply before standing and walking towards the exit of his ship. “anakin wanted to bring you here for a reason. as you know, you should’ve found and forged your kyber crystal for your lightsaber many, many, years ago, but due to your late blooming, you were never able to make it to ilum.”
y/n raised a brow at the recollection of her past and simply nodded, “right… and what does lotho minor have to do with kyber crystals?” the young padawan asked, keeping up with obi-wan’s quick pace, following him into a den carved into the side of a dirt mountain.
as y/n followed obi-wan inside, she looked around and realized that there wasn’t much, other than a plethora of what she could only assume were kyber crystals, never having seen one in person before. y/n raced over to the group of crystals on the dirt, her eyes blown wide with excitement and joy, the first good news in a while, the padawan thought to herself.
she reached down, closing her eyes and let the crystals call to her. as she made her choice on the crystal in the middle, obi-wan chuckled softly,
“gods, you look about as excited as anakin does when queen padmé enters a room, or when he gets sent away on a mission with her.”
y/n’s head flicked up to obi-wan as he spoke, her grip suddenly tightening on the crystal in her hand, “what?”
—
anakin was staring into the fireplace, his mind still racing. it hadn’t stopped, not since yoda had pulled him to the side on his way to training with y/n. it started to cause him extreme discomfort, leaving him with the feeling of being unable to catch a full breath. the young jedi’s mind was bouncing back and forth between right and wrong and what defined each. he found himself starting to question the jedi code, something that had been becoming increasingly more and more common for him. he missed y/n, even though he knew he shouldn’t have.
why did he have to be sent on this mission now? why did his training have to be interrupted? all he wanted was to be with y/n, hold her in his arms. he wanted to-
“anakin, you’ve been quiet since we’ve gotten here, since i told you about y/n.” padmé sat on the couch next to anakin, curling her legs onto the cushion underneath herself. “what are you so worked up about?” padmé shuffled a bit closer now, but anakin’s eyes were still on the flames crackling atop the logs in the stone fireplace.
“padmé, i’d really appreciate some alone time to think right now.” anakin grumbled, not once looking away from the flames ahead of him.
padmé frowned, moving a hair closer to him, “anakin, whatever it is, i’m here for you. if y/n can have someone like him to confide in, you’re certainly allowed to, too.” the queen almost pleaded, watching as anakin stood from the couch, now starting to pace in front of the fireplace.
“i said i’d like some-”
with a soft, annoyed, sigh, padmé stood as well, grabbing anakin by his wrist and pulling him close enough to take his face in her hands, pulling anakin’s lips into her own. she was smiling as she kissed him, but her smile quickly diminished and was replaced with shock when the jedi pushed her away from him,
“padmé, what have you done..?” anakin sounded horrified, wiping her kiss off his lips with his sleeves, fear filling his eyes and heart. y/n. his thoughts were only of her, his young padawan, who was going to be devastated when she found out.
“i have to go.” the jedi said worriedly, his eyes flickering around every surface in the room until his eyes landed on the spacecraft key.
“anakin, wait, i’m sorry, come back! wait!” the queen called after him. as 3po finally began to clamber back up the hill from the market, a basket of food in his arms, he saw his very angry master storming towards the spacecraft they'd all arrived on, the wind flapping his robes behind him. anakin was a threatening presence right now, even the droid could sense it.
“sir, i have returned with the--oh, where are you going?” the droid asked, turning to direct his question to his master as anakin stormed past the droid,
“3po, stay here with the queen until i or another jedi comes back.” was all that anakin said, quickly throwing himself into the ship's cockpit.
in that moment, anakin had made a decision.
he would no longer standby and let the jedi code dictate his every move, thought, and action. he was the chosen one, it was time to choose something for himself and what he held dear. he was done being a weapon of the republic.
he had to find y/n, fast.
—
“it was…always her, wasn’t it…?”
“y/n, what have i told you about always and never, the more time passes, the more i swear you’re just like-” obi-wan’s eyes finally met the glowing crystal in y/n’s hand.
he drew his lightsaber out of pure instinct, his breath caught in his lungs, “y/n…” obi-wan whispered in disbelief.
y/n’s racing heart was ignored as she looked down at the red kyber crystal in her hand, her body on autopilot as she placed the crystal into the hilt of the saber, as if she had repeated the process multiple times in her life. the red of her lightsaber illuminating her face in the darkness of the cave.
y/n realized that obi-wan wasn’t breathing, her hand raised to use the force to expand his lungs out of pure habit, an action she'd learned from her master who had used the method on herself when she was panicking and couldn't breathe. she hadn't thought twice, fear overtaking her mind and body, “m-master? what does this mean?” the young girl was terrified out of her mind.
obi-wan powered off his lightsaber, the hilt of the saber placed on his side once more when he realized y/n wasn’t going to hurt him.
“run. run while i’m extending to you compassion that i shouldn’t.” obi-wan’s tone was sad, his heart pained for the young padawan. “i won’t tell anyone where you’ve gone, but you must run, y/n. i can no longer protect you.” y/n looked up at obi-wan, attempting to make eye contact with him, but he kept his gaze on the ground, unable to look at her.
“obi-wan, i-” y/n pleaded out softly,
“GO!” obi-wan yelled, turning his back to y/n, his fists clenched at his sides.
devastation filled y/n as she stood, forcing herself to her feet, “tell…tell my master i’m sorry i couldn’t say goodbye.” she mustered out before taking off deeper into lotho minor.
obi-wan heard her run off, his back still to her as she spoke. he found himself turning around to watch her frame disappear into the distance, swallowing his feelings. he watched for another moment more, even after she left his line of sight before heading back to his spacecraft,
alone.
when obi-wan returned to coruscant, he did not immediately report back to the council, instead electing to go straight to his quarters. he stared at his reflection in the mirror of his bathroom, unsure if he was proud or scared of the man looking back at him.
—
upon anakin’s return to coruscant, he immediately found himself at the door of his padawan’s quarters. he knocked on her door, calling out her name quietly. he received no answer, only making his heart race faster. he closed his eyes, using the force to sense her, but he didn’t feel her presence at all, not on this planet.
had obi-wan and she already gone to lotho minor? he hadn’t even been gone a full week, and obi-wan had already taken her to forge her crystal. he was distracted from his thoughts when he heard footsteps behind him.
it was grand master yoda approaching him.
anakin walked towards the grand master, not even remembering to nod his head respectfully towards yoda, the worry for y/n entirely consuming all of his mind,
“where’s my y/n? where’s my padawan?” the young jedi’s voice was laced with worry. he ignored the taken aback expression on yoda’s face at his words, his fear only monsooning at the grand master’s words,
“heard from her, we have not. master obi-wan the last to see and hear from her, he was.” yoda answered.
“how long has it been since you’ve heard from her?” anakin asked, trying and failing to remain calm. he couldn't stop his voice from trembling.
“the day her assignment under obi-wan began, saw her, last we did.” the day anakin left coruscant?
i’m going to lose my mind, the jedi thought to himself.
as anakin ran off towards obi-wan’s quarters, the jedi ignored the grand master’s calls for him, only focusing on finding obi-wan as fast as he could. fear threatened to swallow anakin whole, the fact that no one had heard from y/n terrifying him.
everything anakin was doing was for her.
anakin didn’t even knock when he found obi-wan’s quarters, using the force to swing the door open as he stepped inside, “obi-wan!” he called out for his master, stepping deeper into the room.
obi-wan had been on his balcony, leaning on the railing and staring out at the sky as he heard anakin approach. he didn’t turn around or even acknowledge the young jedi until anakin stood at his side.
“where’s y/n? yoda said you were the last to hear from her, you were the last to see her! where is she?” anakin was a mixture of anger and anxiety, a fiery ball of emotion that scared obi-wan.
“anakin, please calm down.” was all the older jedi said before turning to face anakin, his face troubled. seeing the burden that obi-wan carried on him and feeling the weight of obi-wan’s stress in the force only forced anakin to speak, needing confirmation that his worst case scenario wasn’t coming to fruition,
“obi-wan, tell me where y/n is.” he said after a breath, his hands on the banister of the balcony, squeezing so tightly that his knuckles turned white, as he gazed at obi-wan pleadingly.
“she…" a pause. "is no longer with us, anakin.” obi-wan said quietly, his gaze still not on anakin. anakin thought he was going to be sick, a cold sweat beading at the back of his neck and down his back.
“what do you mean, no longer with us, obi-wan? now really isn’t the time for jokes, i’d like to see my padawan and her new lightsaber that you two were supposed to go retrieve.” anakin's tone was one of deep denial, despite not knowing exactly what obi-wan meant by his words.
for a moment, obi-wan considered telling the young jedi that his padawan had died, to save him the pain of knowing that y/n was no longer a padawan, but a sith apprentice.
“she…” the words were stuck in obi-wan’s throat, unsure of where to begin in his explanation, “i think you should take a seat, anakin, perhaps we should go inside and-”
anakin slammed his hand down on the banister, the metal reverberating with a soft whine, “damnit, obi-wan, tell me what happened!”
“she belongs to the dark side, now, anakin.” obi-wan finally lifted his gaze to who was once his own padawan. “i brought her to the cavern on lotho minor like you asked of me, she picked up her chosen crystal, and i made a silly joke and laughed… by the time i looked up, she was wielding a red light saber. i’m so sorry anakin.”
“did you kill her…?” anakin asked, his chest constricting painfully as he looked away from obi-wan, “what did you say to her?!” it took all of his restraint to not grab obi-wan and throw him over the edge of the balcony,
obi-wan was silent for a moment, “no. i didn’t. i let her go, anakin. i couldn’t. she wasn't going to hurt me, that's why i let her go.” he took a deep breath before continuing, “she looked excited, beyond it, to set her eyes upon the crystals. i said something along the lines of her expression was similar to how you looked when the queen walked into a room, or when you were assigned on a mission with her, i thought she’d laugh. i still don’t understand what happened…” obi-wan shook his head, entirely oblivious that his poorly made and timed joke cost anakin everything.
anakin couldn’t stop himself before his hand found the hilt of his lightsaber, a desolate look on his face as he flicked the power button, the blue energy buzzing and whirring in the air alongside him.
anakin heard y/n’s laugh, pictured her smile in his head, his anger towards obi-wan only growing, i never even had the chance to tell her i love her.
“you turned her against me…”
obi-wan’s heart shattered at the sight before him, his hand hesitantly finding his own lightsaber, the blade still powered off as he spoke, “anakin, don’t do this. don’t let her twist your mind with the dark side!” anakin’s former master pleaded with him, his heart heavy already with the loss of a powerful padawan like y/n. he couldn’t bear to watch his own former padawan fall to the dark side too. “you’re my brother anakin, please-”
“don’t lecture me obi-wan, i see through the lies of the jedi, i do not fear the dark side as you do.”
obi-wan finally powered on his lightsaber, his own emotion threatening to consume him as he took on a defensive stance,
“then i will do what i must.” obi-wan whispered, unable to stop his emotion from breaking through.
"you will try."
#misguidedswagger#reader insert#fanfiction#angst#requests open#x reader#fluff#female reader#anakin skywalker x reader#star wars#anakin skywalker fanfiction#anakin skywalker#anakin skywalker angst x reader#darth vader#star wars prequels#sw prequels#obi wan kenobi#mace windu#yoda#fem reader#poll results#anakin skywalker x reader angst#anakin skywalker imagine#anakin skywalker x you#send reqs#star wars fanfic#star wars fanfiction#star wars fic#star wars fandom#anakin x you
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no bc imagine gamer blade with virgin/inexperienced reader 🥹🥹 (im in my gamer blade brainrot rn omg)
INEXPERIENCED.
— featuring ┊gamer ! blade x fem!reader
— warnings / content warnings ┊all consensual btw! not proofread cuz i’m a lazy bum, virgin!reader obvi.. blade referred 2 as “yingxing” bladie being all gentle with u but then it goes wrong (he loses 2 his demons), mating press, overall suggestive content. 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
— a/n ┊oooo ngl i lowkey feel like he would also be a virgin, like it’s his first time too but he knows more than u do, ykwim? (this has been rotting in my drafts for awhile here u go!!)
honestly.. it’s not like you were experienced in this sort of thing.. and it’s not like you were thinking about doing this kind of thing when you’re ready, you had knowledge about it but you weren’t told that it was gonna probably gonna hurt for the first time?!
here you were, hands gripping at the sheets from beneath your sweating frame.. trying your absolute best not to squeeze and clench around blade’s cock that was carefully buried deep inside your drenched cunt, it’s not like you weren’t enjoying it.. you loved it. you absolutely love the fact that it fits just right, filling you up only a few inches deep! he was not even barely in and you were already moaning out his name, nuzzling your nose against the flesh of his neck to hide the blush that crossed your face. it was embarrassing really, atleast that’s what you thought. you were inexperienced and blade knew that, he said he was as well but you didn’t quite understand just why and how he’s so good with using his dick, you didn’t know if he did this sort of thing before and he was lying or he watched played or watched some.. pornographic film, you didn’t even know! you were so deep in thought that you almost didn’t even feel the pain of him fully sliding himself into you so easily, forcing a choked moan from your throat.
out of reflex almost, your pussy pulsed around his cock.. the walls of your insides pulling him in even closer as blade threw his head back at the sudden movement, fighting the urge to thrust into you completely and break you tonight, but that’s not happening.. no.. not tonight at least. blade wanted to take it slow with you, be sweet.. but the way you were clenching around him made it more difficult to control those urges. “e—easy sweetheart, eaasy.. yeah that’s it..” his voice sent a line of electricity through your body, making you jolt. aeons, he really knew how to use his cock.. he knew how to use it pretty well and he knew how to show you just how good he can use it.
“yingxing.. y—yingxing ‘s too much already.. dunno if i can take it..” you whined to him, clutching tight on the cotton black shirt he always wore until your knuckles turned white, squeezing your eyes shut when you finally feel his cock sliding in and out of you, his thrusts were slow and sweet.. passionate and full of love. but yet, it was your first time and you had such a tough time trying to accommodate his length.. it’s like you could feel tears forming from the ends of your eyes already from how good it felt, yet it hurt like a bitch. you didn’t know if your tears were from the pleasure or pain, but it’s safe to say it was from both.
“you can take it, big girl. i know you can. c’mon, keep going.. you got this.” he praised, well that was a surprise. blade had his hands on your knees to help your legs spread out more, letting the cold air brush against your soaked pussy as you whined again, he bit down on your shoulder to try and restrain himself from ruining you for the night. sweat trailed down all over your body from how hot it was, blade could almost feel like his body was melting and burning from the heat of the moment, running his fingers through his hair as he looked down at you with a dangerous stare. that sight.. that sight of you beneath him.. how sweat dripped down all over your body, how your breasts were slightly bouncing from the impact of his gentle thrusts, how sweet you sounded every time you whispered “yingxing..” under your breath, how you had your hand on your mouth to prevent you from making any more noises.. oh how he stretched your poor pussy out from his cock alone, how lewd the sounds of squelching were.. it drove him crazy.
well, you weren’t wrong when you thought about how good he was with his cock! and there, blade lost control as his slow passionate thrusts became more quickened and desperate ones, his grunts growing louder the more he slammed himself into you, tightening his grip around your knees. “yingxing..?—“ “sorry.. i need this.. i need this now, angel. i’m sorry— ah..” was all he mumbled before his dick practically hit every spot inside your walls, you could’ve sworn you could feel your eyes gouging out of your eye sockets as his pace quickened further, grabbing ahold of your knees and forcefully pinning them against your chest, keeping them in place as he proceeded to dick you down, the sound of creaking from the bed increasing as well as your moans and the noise of skin slapping against each other, fuck.. he was getting more and more desperate the more he fucked his dick into you, egging you on to take more of his length and girth.
“fuck fuck fuck.. yingxing please!” your voice was muffled against him, wrapping your arms around his neck as blade bullied his cock deeper and deeper into your cunt, his tongue flicking against the skin of your neck as his fingers gently squeezed your breast. “mm.. does that feel good?" blade asked softly, his tone now filled with lust. “yeah.. more? you want more? i’ll fucking give you more..”
blade was completely out of it now.. squeezing you in a mating press as he pushed your knees further down your chest, the new position allowed his dick to access your deepest areas.. the pain soon disappearing as it was replaced with pure pleasure and euphoria, the euphoric feeling deep within your veins.. that euphoric feeling of how good he was fucking ypu to oblivion. “don’t squeeze around me like that.. you’re gonna make me cum, [name].. i can’t—“ blade bit his lip as he grabbed your knees, pinning them even further as he pounded inside your aching pussy, the position could make him come alone from how flexible you were.. damn. “yingxing!” the way you said his name, the way his named rolled so gently off your tongue, your teary eyed expression.. he wanted to see even more of it.
honestly.. you were inexperienced but you don’t think that.. you were inexperienced enough to take his cock. you knew damn well that night.. you took him like it was nothing.
perhaps.. maybe you can do it again more often?
#ᖭི༏ᖫྀ maryse’s diary ૮꒰˶˃̵ ^ ˂̵˵꒱ა#blade <33#honkai star rail smut#blade pussy destroyer#hsr smut#blade smut#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail blade#blade x reader#blade x you#hsr blade#hsr x you#hsr x reader
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y/n + her plants .
synopsis; just 3 little drabbles of y/n being the only extrovert and obsessed with plants.
trope; le sserafim x 6th member!reader, platonic , just silly poorly written stuff
wc; 2.0k
cw; none
a/n; im ngl this is just a self indulgent self insert of the author. i love female friendships! also i was half asleep writing this, but i really like the 2nd clip idk it makes me giggle a little :3 i had planned to write more, but i got tired soooo... also did not spellcheck at the end zzz please read my other works if u actually want decently written stuff
Clip 1:
It was your turn to turn in a vlog for the week, and you decided to utilize this time to do a room tour. You grin into the camera as you make your way to you and Yunjin’s shared bedroom, opening the door and showing the interior to the camera. It was a spacious room, with posters and photographs plastered all along the walls alongside other decor such as string lights, unique shaped mirrors, and endless figurines and trinkets lined on the shelves. One of the most prominent features of the room though was the amount of pure green all throughout. There were plants quite literally everywhere. On the windowsill, hanging off the ceiling, held up on the wall, on the floor, the tables, the shelves. It felt like just about any free space was touched by mother nature herself.
You grin sheepishly as you explain, “Not many people know this– well I guess now many people will know this, but I am a super big plant person!”
The camera slowly pans over all of the plants as well as some of Yunjin’s belongings, including her guitar, glasses, and some smiski’s you two co-parent. “Thankfully Yunjin doesn’t mind me hogging up some space for my babies, and I pay her back in smiski figurines!!” Grabbing hold of a little green man on the table that was struggling to put on a sweater, you shove its face into the camera as you giggle, “I think this one's my favorite, me and Yunjin are still trying to come up with a name for him.”
You look around, trying to figure out which plant to showcase first before you catch sight of one particular plant you enjoy. “Oh! I want to show you guys my favorite pot…” The camera pans to a comically large and rather beat up leather boot, which humbly held home to a mini monstera within its space.
“It was a random shoe I found near a river during filming one time. Viney here seems to enjoy it,” You grin, accidentally letting it slip that you name every single one of your plants as well as touch random garbage you find outside before you showcase another “pot,” being a mug that had the words “Live Laugh Love” plastered boldly on the side as you snicker, “this one just makes me laugh. Jen hates it, but I don’t think she can recognize the beauty in irony.”
You let out a sigh as you make your way towards your bed, plopping down onto it as you speak. “Y’know, I personally believe I’m a great candidate to collaborate on a show with Chuu, Tsuki, and Yuqi sunbaenim,” the ramble starts, completely derailing from the original topic of plants as you speak. Your tone is lighthearted and playful, but you’re being completely serious as you continue, “I want to do a bunch of random jobs and harass random people on the street!! I’m perfectly capable of doing that! I’d do that even if I wasn’t getting paid!”
You start to laugh, realizing how ridiculous you started to sound, but you didn’t care, you pressed the topic on. “If I weren't an idol I’d make a great farmer! Why haven’t I gotten invited to be a farmer with Chuu sunbaenim??” An endless string of various other jobs as well as explanations behind why you would qualify for every one of them begins to spew out of your mouth. You were always a major talker, and quite literally had no filter nor shame when it came to what you had to say. More often than not, you were leading conversations at social events if Chaewon hadn’t already beat you to it– and having alone time with your own thoughts and a camera to record it all was a recipe for disaster.
At the end of your rant, you find yourself slightly winded before making direct eye contact with the camera, pointing your finger directly into it as you announce, “If any TV company is out there watching this right now, this is my application to be a guest on one of your shows! Any job will do, I’ll do it! But just know I’ll leave you farmers in the dust if you put me out in the fields. Watch your back.”
As a last “threat” to broadcasters all around the world, you threateningly do a “I’m watching you” gesture with your hand before placing your hand over the camera, ending the vlog.
Clip 2:
Eunchae spins around the dorm building, giving the viewers on the livestream a living room tour as she looks around, coming up with random things to showcase on the spot. So far, she’s shown off the inside of the fridge, their oven, and underneath the couch. The young girl’s eyebrows furrow as she contemplates what to show fearnots next, her eyes landing on your precious arrangement of houseplants that you lovingly arranged in front of the balcony door. Eunchae clears her throat dramatically as she turns the camera towards your plants, squatting down next to them as she makes sure the audience can see both her and them within the frame.
“As you guys can see here, we have y/n’s plants… She's COVERED the apartment full of them, Chaewon unnie has to scold her every time she brings one home.” She giggles into the camera before shaking her head, “I’m convinced she loves those things more than us…”
Faint rustling could be heard within the background, and Eunchae turns her head, opening her mouth as if to call out to whoever was home, but she pauses.An imaginary light bulb goes off in her head as Eunchae gasps, looking straight into the camera as she grins mischievously. “I have an idea… Watch this!” She scrambles onto the floor, laying flat on her stomach on top of the floor tile as she props her phone up against the wall hidden behind a stool. The camera perfectly showcases the plants, the living room, and the curtains covering the screen door.
[ynniez] – oh no… [huhjin001] – this is going to be good [2ningz] - 🥸🥸🥸
The giggles can't seem to stop as Eunchae hops onto her feet and immediately dashes behind the curtains, pressing her finger up to her lips towards the camera in a “shh…!” motion before she disappears.
“Eunchae?” your voice rings out as you return to your living quarters, grocery bags in hand as the camera perfectly captures your entrance. You don’t think much of the silence that follows as you place the bags down, making your way over to your plants with a grin.
“Hello my lovelies~” You say to your plants, squatting down to examine them individually before grabbing hold of the watering can nearby. As you lift up the can, Eunchae suddenly bursts through the curtains, exclaiming “BOO!” as loud as possible, resulting in you screaming at a decibel twice as high.
Unfortunately for the maknae, she had failed to foresee the possibility of you watering your plants at this exact moment– resulting in you blindly chucking 90% of the water inside the can towards the culprit in a panic. Eunchae stands there frozen, oversized sweatshirt and hair absolutely soaked with her mouth agape as she stares at you in complete shock.
“What THE FU– EUNCHAE??” You yell out, watching the younger girl simply freeze in front of you like a wet cat. You switch to English for just one moment, simply saying, “Girl…” as you clutch your hand over your heart, trying to steady the rapid beating.
Eunchae’s shocked expression shifts into one of glee as her mouth still remains open, now smiling as her body rotates to where the phone hid, silently pointing in the general direction of the camera as she tries not to burst out into laughter on the spot.
You stare at her in complete confusion before following her finger, eyes finally landing on the livestream as your eyes widen, suddenly feeling very exposed in her own home. “No way you just got all of that on camera…”
Eunchae finally allows the laughter to flow, as she suddenly spreads her arms out, inching her way towards you. “You did this to me, unnie!!!” She roars, making attempts to trap you in a hug as you scream, running offscreen as the live abruptly ends.
Clip 3:
You’re seen with your face comically close to the camera, a habit that soon became a signature of your livestreams as you watch the viewers and comments roll in. You glaze over them before flipping the camera around, showing Sakura within the kitchen, wearing a pink apron and plastic gloves as she cuts up some vegetables. “Hi everyone!! Today, Kkura unnie and I are making omelets for the girls with microgreens I’ve grown MYSELF in OUR apartment!!” You loudly exclaim, shoving the camera close to the cutting board as Sakura rolls her eyes, chuckling at the sight as you eventually point the camera elsewhere.
“You did a very good job growing these y/n-nnie. They look great.” The comment from the older girl made you shy, and you flip the camera back to your face as you place a hand on your cheek, “hehe, thank you Kkura-unnie~” you coo, shifting your gaze back to the viewers before sighing.
“I grew all kinds of stuff in here, like basil, arugula, cilantro, kale…” You trail off, counting the number of edible plants you’ve grown on your finger before continuing, “but I could make so much more if I had a full blown garden!!” You whine, and Sakura could be seen in the background rolling her eyes, playfully commenting, “not this again…”
You dramatically lean on Sakura’s back with your own despite her already being hunched over while chopping as you sigh even louder this time, “I’m serious unnie!! The stuff I could grow for you guys.. You would have a whole salad in one place!!”
Leaving the older member to her task, you place the camera down before grabbing some eggs and cracking them into a bowl, impressively doing so with only one hand each as the comments complimented your skill.
[makna33] – master chef y/n?? [nay00n1] – girl what cant u do…
A laugh escapes your lips as you beat the eggs, “guys, its not that impressive. Besides, I don’t cook nearly as often or as well as Kkura-unnie.” The compliment garners a small smile from the other girl seen in the corner of the screen as you continue on, “anyways, if I had my own garden in the building, I would graft the best tomatoes ever… I’d be real life Frankenstien creating the perfect tomato!” You start, knowing that most likely nobody would actually care for your facts, but you shared anyways, this was YOUR live after all.
“Oh! We’re also using my basil today in one of the omelets. Guys, if you’re ever growing your own basil at home, make sure to pinch off the flowers! It makes it tastier!!” You point the chopsticks you used to whisk the egg at your phone camera, and some of the yolk is thrown onto the screen as your eyes widen, looking back at Sakura to make sure she didn't see what you just did.
You quickly wipe off the gunk before returning to your kitchen duties as if nothing happened, “These eggs are gonna be so good… Though, I did have a pretty bad mealybug problem with the greens at some point… Do you guys know what those are? They’re like these little white dusty bugs that suck the sap out of your plants if you don’t do anything about them. I had SO MANY. But I refused to give up on em and now they're critter free!”
“Yah! Y/n! Don’t talk about the bugs in your plants!! The girls won’t want to eat it then!” Sakura scolds, playfully kicking your side with her leg as she focuses on frying the eggs.
You giggle as you look into the camera, “oops– don’t tell them that there used to be bugs in their food.”
“WHAT?!”
The sound of Kazuha and Chaewon’s shrill voice rings out in the live, and you immediately slam your phone down, giving the viewers a black screen before the live ends.
#kpop x fem reader#kpop fanfic#gg fanfic#kpop#kpop x female reader#le sserafim x reader#kpop x reader#lesserafim x reader#le sserafim imagines#lesserafim imagines#sakura x reader#chaewon x reader#yunjin x reader#nakamura kazhuha x reader#eunchae x reader#le sserafim scenarios#miyawaki sakura x reader
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hey sorry if this is prying but im just curious, i noticed you had an anon awhile back that was like harrassing you about cnc and it made me wonder if you ever get anon hate or anything? and like what do ppl say? because i cant imagine anyone having a problem with sex ed. like its insane to me that someone would say something so shitty to you about cnc and im sorry they were an asshole :( your blog is great thanks for being so helpful about literally everything lmao
No apology needed, I think this is such a sweet question. <33
I get anon hate every couple days at least, ngl, I just don't post it.
Sometimes it's people angry I support porn/kink (I literally got two anons from a radfem telling me that meant I supported child slavery, along with several death threats), sometimes it's people angry I support trans women (that's more frequent), sometimes it's people really angry I'm a feminist (I get asks telling me I'm 'misandrist bitch' more frequently than you would believe).
I get hate messages because apparently telling people to go see a doctor or maybe look up XYZ medical condition they're having symptoms of is "advice only a doctor should give out!!!"
People sometimes get pissed about me talking to people about their experiences with sexual assault/rape/child abuse too (this is also apparently only something therapists should do and I 'have no business' explaining what falls under child abuse or sexual assault, ect).
I also get hate messages just based on things like me being Black, me being trans, me being autistic, which is less common now that I'm not being stalked so much lol but still unfortunately prevalent. (Got accused of race-faking and being a race traitor in the same ask a week ago, still can't quite figure out that one LMAO)
It is hard to imagine people having problems with sex education from so many standpoints but unfortunately, some people really DO have a problem with it and with people like me teaching it in particular. ;_;
Suffice to say, I don't post most of it because it just doesn't seem like that'd be worth anyone's time but I posted that one about CNC because in comparison to the type of asks I usually get, that was very tame and I thought there was a slim possibility it was just a misunderstanding.
I don't think it was because I got a very pissed anon afterwards over it but lol, sometimes you've gotta leave room for those misunderstandings even if they're not misunderstandings.
I got an ask from someone else afterwards, saying it was a very helpful response for them as someone who knew very little about CNC, so if for that alone, I count it as worth it!
Also, don't worry about that ask, it didn't bother me at all. I'm so glad you enjoy the blog, y'all enjoying it and learning from it very much makes it all worth it to me. <3
#sex education#asks#anon hate#\o/#your very sweet for asking anon#not sure if this is like.#a normal amount of hate anons or what#but yknow i roll with it lol
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my initial first-read thoughts for SOTR PART II: THE RASCAL there will be MAJOR SPOILERS under the cut but pls enjoy :)
chapter 10;
fake louella is so interesting, i'm excited to see where this plot point goes
"and someone's definitely rapping at my chamber door." we are 2 for 2 on The Raven references that's wild
"what breaks a machine?" "time." and the machine in question is the Capitol itself suzanne u kinda ate w that.
chapter 11;
whatever u do don't think about haymitch and burdock sneaking into victors' village to admire the luxury of the houses only for haymitch (and burdock's daughter) to spend great portions of their lives trapped in those houses drowning in their luxury
beetee entrusting this complicated ass plan to a 16 year old is crazy work bro
maysilee trying not to giggle at haymitch's singing... her and effie would be best friends i fear
haymitch picking up the word aphorism from snow immediately and using it himself ohhhh my sweet clever boy :(
chapter 12;
ceasar flickerman mention thank u jesus
guys... guys i'm not even joking i read the words "big, big, big day" and i burst into tears #normal
chapter 13;
ITS REAL ITS REALLY HER HOLY FUC K
OLDER SISTER EFFIE CANON
ngl i did not think we would get an effie cameo. not even a little bit. i didn't even let myself hope for it in any small way. life is so fucking good rn
okay so effie is obviously a Little Older than we've all be writing her huh
"well, she's swallowed the capitol propaganda hook and took the line and sinker with it, but at least she's brought us some decent footwear." TEARS. TEARS IN MY EYES.
i cannot believe i have lived to see the day where we actually get canon haymitch pov perceiving effie this is crazy
The Trinkets being slightly socially disgraced... interesting.
"For a moment, they're just two girls on a mission to beautiful the world." WHAT DID I SAY. I KNEW THEY WOULD BE BESTIES.
HAYFFIE CRUMBS HAYFFIE CRUMBS
not him jumping to pick up her shit for her... in a world of boys he's a gentlemen
EFFIE THINKS HE'S BEAUTIFUL :((((
"the capitol citizens lose it and so do i, until i remember the joke's not just on panache. it's on all of us stupid, clawed district piglets. animals for their entertainment." haymitch gaining class consciousness in real time
"and you, darling?" okayyy abernathy charm
effie just hanging around in the background in making me inexplicably happy. i am smiling and giggling
not her tryna shoot her shot by putting the flower on his label okayyy miss Effie Subtlety Trinket
chapter 14;
"sometimes she cries because things are so beautiful and we keep messing them up. because the world doesn't have to be so terrifying. that's on people, not the world." felt that one in my chest my god...
"i love you like all-fire. that's for always." this food is so fucking good suzanne
effie and plutarch going this far back is... interesting. then why didn't u save her ass from prison during the 75th SIR?
"i hate needles" PLASTIC SURGERY PHOBIC EFFIE CANON!!!!
another The Raven reference... what is going on
chapter 15;
mags mother of millions
MORE HAYFFIE CRUMBS SUZANNE I OWE U MY LIFE
haymitch asking her to make sure the token gets back to lenore dove... effie laying a hand on his chest and promising to do her best... the interconnected web that is haydove / hayffie has never been more alive
effie being the last person he sees before going into the arena is kinda insanely romantic??? "locking my eyes on hers until things go black" ??? hello??
chapter 16;
"the games must end. here. now." and then he's gonna spend so many years watching them happen over and over and over again suzanne how dare u
"i don't want one of my last acts to be taking out an ally, especially a dove-coloured one." he loves lenore dove sm im crying fr
"fire is catching, she'd say" ... suzanne is doing comedy now
chapter 17;
"i can't keep one of them safe. why do they flock to me?" just thought about him having this mindset for the next 40 years and cried :(((
chapter 18;
"in a way, it's a comfort that a bunch of people i know have gone before me." my baby :( spoken too soon girl :(
haymitch trying to blow this shit up katniss&haymitch fatherdaughterism has never been more alive and well
ampert :( haymitch's closeness with a lot of the victors makes so much more sense now. like it's not JUST that they hang out during the in-between years but their lives are tied so closely together from the moment haymitch enters the games.
is the goose and the common song silly? yes. is it important to remember that the enclosure of common land is historically and inextricably linked to (1) the rise of private property, (2) increasingly powerful centralized states, (3) the economic dependence of the labouring poor on their lords of the land. suzanne u big history nerd
he's so hopeful :( he believes so hard :( it's sad to know that that's all slowly washed out of him :(
more slightly intelligent thoughts! even more rambly nothing thoughts! either way i hope u enjoyed :)
#sunrise on the reaping#sotr spoilers#haymitch abernathy#effie trinket#hayffie#seph thoughts#i plan to finish the book tomorrow!!!
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