#never read it also. so i never answered questions. only went to girls camp cause it was fun not cause i like cared about religion

[plinkcat-gif]

every once in a while i remember i was mormon and i think it's so funny that kind of none of the mormon (or even christian) ideals made an impression on me simply because my attention could not be held in that boring ass church. like idk if you wanted me to read the bible or not drink coffee maybe you should've not been so fucking boring. spiky boring ass blue gray carpet. frosted glass windows i couldn't people watch out of. same jesus painting on either side of the building. all i remember liking from church was getting CTR (choose the right) rings because i thought jewelry was so cool but id always lose them like a day later lmao

[what-if-nct]

hiiii today's reminder is this might be just me but taemin's mv teasers and the new batch of pictures plus the heavy christian guilt symbolism he keeps adding into his songs are giving me strong closeted queer vibes. and that's not just me projecting/expecting queerness from him, I'm very very very strongly against assuming sexuality, but the mv teaser is giving me call me by your name summer followed by being sent to a religious boarding school because your parents found out about the call me by your name summer. something about the imagery just felt like the freedom of expressing your true self for the first time

Hiii, and I totally get what you mean, like the recent teaser kinda gave me the the same energy as the movie But I'm a cheerleader, if you've never seen it it's about a cheerleader who's family and friends suspects she's a lesbian and they send her to a conversion camp, she's completely unaware of her own sexuality but then she she falls in love with a girl there, there's a scene i watched at 12 that answered some questions i had about my own sexuality. So it did very much give that energy. But also as it went on I also got like a loss of childhood. Like the beginning felt like boyhood the joy of being an adolescent it reminded me of the Riize memories mv where they're playing in the water and they're carefree and happy. It was very much that energy but then having to be pulled away from that and put in a situation where you've lost your innocence and the childlike wonder of the world you had before experiencing something dark. But I could be reading too much into it. But I can't wait to see where it's going.

But speaking of, Riize, Wayv, Stray Kids and Taemin are all having comebacks at the same time I genuinely gave up on keeping track of anyone cause it's so much. What ever I see is just a draw of luck. There is a chance only one will actually catch all of my attention but I can't tell you who it would be but actually Riize might be the one cause don't hate me they're the only ones who've really held my attention. Like the 90s vibe really struck something for me. I thought their teaser was a 90s boy group throwback with that I'm sold. And Taro looks so good!! Stray Kids the teaser pics caught me but the newer mv teasers kinda lost me cause it's just not my vibe. Wayv honestly kinda got lost in everything literally so I have to refocus to them. I miss when all I had to worry about was exo. I haven't even watched the MV for cream soda my head is hurting just thinking about it. I think I'm going to need a kpop hiatus, I get easily overwhelmed. I'm tapping out it's too much. I just wanna drink tea and play with my dolls. I'm getting my scissors, someone's going to get a bob.

[sunfish-studies]

Moonrise

✄・・・ Feathery Ink [Karasuno Manager Series]

➜ Pairing: Karasuno x Manager! Reader

➜ Warning: none

➜ Notes: This is a separate series from Crisp Leaves. Similar to Crisp Leaves, manager in this story will be portrayed as a girl. She will be tall. This is just my appreciation towards tall girls, you guys are amazing.

Previous:  ‹ Greed › | Next:  ‹ Illusionary Hero ›

↷ SUMMARY ↶

It’s finally summer vacation training camp!

After the fight, Hinata and Kageyama weren’t really talking to each other–Coach Ukai even separated them during practice, Hinata in team B while Kageyama in the other. When practice was over, Kageyama was working on his tosses with Yachi’s help while Hinata drive elsewhere with his bike to practice on his own.

“Ah, he’s with my grandpa.” You asked where on earth did Hinata go, and that’s your answer from Coach Ukai. Apparently, Hinata was training with the previous Coach Ukai at their home. That left you with managerial duties and some extras like buying supplies for the training camp.

The injury you received of course was noticeable by the team–it almost send both Tanaka and Nishinoya into rampage, but you quickly said it’s not a problem and it would heal in no time. While you could make up some excuse for Daichi, Sugawara, and Ennoshita, you couldn’t with Shimizu. With a stern look from, you finally spilled the beans and she promised not to tell anyone.

While Kageyama wasn’t talking to Hinata, he’s definitely talking to you more now–along with walking you home if you chose to stay at practice longer. With that, you learn more about him and how he’s undoubtedly a volley ball dork through and through.

The time you had to depart from school to Tokyo for the training camp at night, he offered to picked up from your house so you could walk together to school.

“C-can I sit next to you…?” the raven-haired boy asked. Of course, you agreed wholeheartedly since Yachi will be sitting next to Shimizu and sitting alone didn’t seem to be fun. At first, you talked about some mundane things and watched a few videos saved in your phone before falling asleep leaning to each other.

“KAGEYAMA!!”

“HOW DARE YOU STEAL A HEADSTART!”

And it incurred the wrath of both Tanaka and Nishinoya when they realized. Thankfully, Ennoshita was quick to shut them up by slapping them on the head and Daichi glared at them menacingly for causing a ruckus.

.

.

“Well, the grand guest finally arrived,” when you carried the big bag filled with your essentials outside the bus, it was immediately gone from your hands. Kuroo plucked it from your grip so he could carry it instead, sending you a small smile.

“Kuroo-san, it’s been a while.” Greeting the older boy, you stepped to the ground.

“It’s nice knowing you stick to your promise,”

“Well, it’s impossible for me to not join the training camp. And,” you looked up to the building upon the stairs. When it was in Nekoma High School before, this time training camp was held at different area–however, you didn’t complain because even during summer, the place was cool with many trees surrounding and breeze swept by. “Why are we in a different place? I thought it’s being held only in one place.”

Kuroo hummed. “It’s a tradition for training camp during summer vacation happened in Shinzen. This place is cool, so it’s great. Why? You wanted to be cooked under the sun instead?”

“I’d rather not.”

“Hinata! Did you grow any taller!? Oh! Otohaku-chan!! You’re looking pretty as always!!”

“Lev, shut up.” Kenma scolded.

.

.

“[NAME]-CHAN!! Make sure to cheer for me, alright!!”

“She won’t, Bokuto-san. And please don’t call her by her first name when she didn’t mention you could.”

Thank goodness, Akaashi had a say because you didn’t know how to reply that without wanting to upset Bokuto in the process. The first match was Karasuno against Fukurodani and it didn’t go well–your team splendidly didn’t sync because everyone went to try the new moves their practicing, resulting they had to take a new kind of penalty.

Along with Yachi, you watch as everyone sprinting uphill. And it didn’t happen only one time, every time they lost a match, they had to do one before walking down and downing their drinks. It went until the last practice–which they splendidly managed to lost.

“Hitoka-chan, could you look over Kageyama-kun and Hinata-kun in my place,” you whispered to your best friend, referring to the duo who’s clearly itching for practice but couldn’t exactly say it clearly as they still in bad terms with each other.

“Yeah! I was thinking about that too!” the two of you nodded in determination.

“Uhm, [Name]-san,” Yamaguchi called out to you, rubbing his nape sheepishly. “I want to practice serve, could you watch over?”

Smiling you nodded, “Sure Yamaguchi-kun! Let me get my notes first, okay?”

The taller boy blinked in confusion. “Eh? Notes? What for?”

“To look over your progress overall,” you kneeled down to put on your outdoor shoes. “I’ll be back as soon as possible.”

“O-oh, okay.” Yamaguchi could only reply that as he didn’t know how exactly–he knew he shouldn’t be flustered or feeling special, but he couldn’t help to feel warmth bloom in his chest. He knew you were an attentive person, and it’s nice to know that applied to everyone on the team even though you’re mostly stick with Kageyama, Hinata, or Yachi.

Jogging towards the sleeping quarters, you could’ve arrived faster to pick up your notebook if Bokuto’s call didn’t halt you from doing so.

“OOH!! [NAME]-CHAN!!” he called out from the third gym. You noticed that he wasn’t alone, Kuroo and Akaashi’s also there and surprisingly Tsukishima. From that, you concluded that Kuroo must have something to do with it–probably taunting the blonde into joining. “Could you throw us some balls!?”

“Eh?” you blinked. “But, I have to get some notes for practice-“

“Just a few, come on!” Bokuto didn’t even give you a chance to explain–instead, he dragged you by the wrist.

So here you were, arranging an apology speech for Yamaguchi while throwing some balls for Akaashi to set. That and giving Lev some glances to check if he’s still alive or not on the floor. The setter already apologized to you in Bokuto’s place, but you immediately dismissed it since you didn’t mind either.

“Geh!? Otohaku-chan!?” Lev must be exhausted seeing as he barely noticed you’re in the same area.

It amazed you on how Bokuto still managed to kill the spikes viciously after series of practice match all day–his stamina is top-notch, nothing less from one of the best players in the country. Watching Bokuto’s spikes meaning also watching Tsukishima tried to block them.

Not once did he managed to successfully shut one out, but with Kuroo’s finally joining the cross was killed almost in an instant. While Bokuto is a formidable opponent in attacking, then Kuroo would be terrifying in defense. No wonder Coach Ukai was making him a great example for a solid blocker.

Tsukishima is indeed smart and calm as he read the opponent’s movement, but,

“Your blocks are pretty weak.” You flinched as Bokuto blurted out what you had in mind regarding Tsukishima’s block–and it sure pissed the taller blonde off. “Your arms are so frail that I’m scared I’m gonna break them. You need to stop the ball like you mean it!”

“I’m still a growing boy!” Tsukishima replied, clearly trying to hide his annoyance. “I’ve just started gaining muscles and getting taller!”

“Talk like that, and the little shrimp is gonna hog all the glory.” Kuroo remarked. “You guys play the same position, right?”

Ouch, you couldn’t help but thought. That hits the sore spot.

“I don’t think it can be helped,” Tsukishima said with a smile after a few seconds of silence. “The difference in natural talent between me and Hinata is too great.”

Before Kuroo could argue, the players of Nekoma began piling into the gym and Tsukishima finally managed to excuse himself successfully this time.

“Looks like you stepped on a mine, Kuroo-san,” Akaashi commented.

“You pissed him off,” Bokuto dragged. “At long last, Kuroo-kun, the master of provocation, has failed.”

“Well, I wouldn’t have thought that.” The black-haired captain sighed.

“Thought what?” Bokuto questioned.

“Karasuno’s shrimp is definitely strange and a threat, but in terms of technique and experience he’s like a baby bird. Plus, he’s really short. I never would’ve thought guy with glasses, who’s far taller and much smarter, wouldn’t only think they’re not equal but actually think the shrimp is above his level.”

Sighing for the second time, he rubbed the back of his head before giving you an apologetic look. “Sorry, I pissed off your middle blocker.”

“I don’t think you pissed him off,” you couldn’t exactly say that it’s fine because it’s not your place to do so. “But you did hit a sore spot, Kuroo-san.”

“Otohaku-san, shouldn’t you get going? We’ve hold you long enough from you whatever you want to do.” Akaashi reminded.

“That’s right, then I’ll excuse myself.” You bowed down and walked towards the exit–you immediately retrieve your note before finally helping Yamaguchi with his serves after being held for some time.

.

.

The next day, you’re helping Eri, Kaori, and Yukie cutting watermelons given by the parents from Shinzen High School. Surely, on this hot summer, sweet and cool watermelons would make anyone’s mouth began watering. It was also a great short break for the boys as they enjoy the watermelon while sitting on the grassy hill beside the gym.

“Do you want extras, senpai?” and just like other managers, you distributed the watermelons while asking if the boys wanted seconds or not. This time, you’re offering a few that’s still on your tray to Tanaka, Daichi, and Asahi.

“Ooh, don’t mind if I do, [Name]-chan!” Tanaka reached out for another slice.

“Me too,” after him, Daichi also took a slice from your tray.

“I’m okay with mine for now,” Asahi politely rejected your offer. “How about you eat some too? It’s quite a hot day.”

“I’ll go it after everyone’s seconds are done,” you remarked, intending to circle around the separate crowds for the nth time but Tanaka quickly interrupted.

“Everybody has their share already! I’m sure they don’t mind.” Your upperclassman commented. “Besides, our beautiful manager deserves to have rest!”

“Somehow, it doesn’t correlate…” Asahi muttered, smiling nervously.

At the end, you ended up sitting down beside Asahi and munching on a slice of watermelon. Your upperclassman was right for one thing–enjoying the fruit in a hot summer day was a great way to cool down, you instantly felt refreshed.

“Sorry, by the way.” The four of you looked up to the call, seeing Kuroo approaching and out of blue apologizing. Surely, your upperclassmen were confused with this except you.

“About what?” Daichi questioned.

“I think I might have pissed off your glasses guy yesterday.”

“What?”

To make it clearer, the cat captain sat down with his back towards you and began explaining the situation occurred the other day–you admired how both parties didn’t once interrupt nor getting things heated up, they knew this wasn’t something big and could be resolved by just a simple apology.

“Wow… Tsukishima actually helped out with free practice even if you cornered him into it,” Daichi hummed in understanding.

“Your manager too, but that’s Bokuto’s idea,” you didn’t know why on earth Kuroo decided to brough it up but seeing your upperclassmen were nonchalant about it (except maybe Tanaka, though he was quickly being shut up by Daichi) it’s also not a big deal.

“So, what did you say?”

“I provoked him and said he was going to lose to your shrimp over there.”

“I’ve definitely noticed that Tsukishima seems to feel inferior to Hinata somehow.” Asahi remarked, probably remembering a few words Tsukishima said to him.

“I’m not sure if this is relevant, but my sister mentioned someone tall named Tsukishima also joined the volleyball team during the Little Giant times.” Tanaka mentioned, surely this is new to all of you because Tsukishima wasn’t the type of person who talks about himself much.

Daichi’s head perked up. “Tsukishima has an older brother?”

“Oh, I’m not sure.” Tanaka quickly replied. “They could’ve just had the same last name and not be related. Do you know anything about this, [Name]-chan?”

“I don’t, but if I know, I think it’s not my place to tell since Tsukishima-kun would undoubtedly be annoyed because of it,” you answered, which made Tanaka hummed in agreement.

“Hey, we’re about to start!” Sugawara called out.

You didn’t know about Tsukishima having a sibling or not, however,

“This is just a club. Why do you put so much into it? It’s because you put so much into it that you suffer later.”

You couldn’t help but think it’s somehow related to what he muttered the night before.

.

.

Yet again when the sky softly bathed in orange glow, Karasuno had to pay their losing with penalty–you along with Yachi and Shimizu also Takeda-sensei and Coach Ukai watched as the boys bolted uphill accompanied by yelling (well, this was mostly Hinata, Kageyama, Tanaka, and Nishinoya).

“Here,” you offered a water bottle for Kageyama. He couldn’t even reply a ‘thank you’ from how harshly he was panting and you could only sympathize with him–more than five matches in a day plus penalties were rough.

“Thanks,” the raven-haired boy finally rasped after downing probably a half of the water from the bottle. You also handed him a towel so he could wipe away the sweat dripping down from his temple.

“So, how’s training going?” you finally asked, which triggered a sighed from him.

“No progress.” The frustration was getting to him definitely–while you were only watching for some time since Yachi’s already there to help him, you understood that Kageyama failed more than he succeeded. He knew he was getting nowhere and time was short, if he’s not geared up it will be a problem.

“I can’t give you any helpful advice but I think you should practice under Coach Ukai’s watch,” you mentioned, and Kageyama listened carefully. “He probably has ways that could help you. You couldn’t do this on your own Kageyama-kun, you need guidance.”

Nodding firmly, he replied. “Yeah.”

“I can’t wait to see your toss,” you then added, giving him a smile. “It’s going to be amazing for sure. You did pinpoint toss to Hinata all this time.”

The boy fell silent for a while, and you almost regretted saying those words–did you somehow step on a landmine? Did you piss him off? Did you touch the nerve-

“I promise to get done and you’ll see it.” The negative thoughts were gone from your mind as you stare at those blue eyes filled with determination. You found yourself smiling at his promise.

“I will be waiting then.”

.

.

“Sensei, what do you think of Tsukishima?” Coach Ukai asked your advisor while the five of you were watching the match between Karasuno and Ubugawa.

“I think he’s taking this seriously,” Takeda-sensei answered, although rather confused from the question.

“How about you, Otohaku?” and you didn’t expect to be involve in the conversation also.

“Uhm… he’s doing his work, but lack of effort? I think he’s not giving his all.” you replied but somehow became an unsure question in the end.

“You’re right,” Coach Ukai remarked. “I feel like Tsukishima gets a passing grade but never tries for 100%. I’m not asking for him to become more passionate, but if he’s not going to give his all, I’m gonna have to change regulars. I need players who can win a match on the court. He’s the tallest and essential to the team. If Tsukishima could become a strong blocker, our defense level would go up a lot.”

“I see,” Takeda-sensei nodded in understanding.

Not long into the game after Tsukishima served, there’s a collision between Daichi and Nishinoya for the ball–at first, it was nerve-wracking because if one of them was hurt it could be bad. However, seeing that the two dismissed it as if it was nothing was relieving.

“Everyone’s so motivated.” Yachi commented.

“Everyone’s more motivated now than I’ve ever seen them before,” Shimizu frowned in worry. “But sometimes it’s almost scary. Collisions like the other day can definitely lead to major injuries.”

Another spike went through but received perfectly by Kageyama, the ball bounced to the air and Tanaka was the second one to get it, passing it immediately to Asahi.

“It’s a little short,” you muttered, noticing the ball was hovering near the net–exactly to where Hinata was. From how he’s staring at it, he’s most likely to steal it–but then he tensed up, snapped his head to the side to give Asahi a stare and stayed in his place in the end.

“Let him know the ball is yours.”

You stared as Asahi successfully killed the ball even with three blockers–grinning from how he stole a score and holding them team together so it wouldn’t become lawless. The attempt was enough for you to let your shoulders relaxed.

“Maybe I didn’t need to worry after all.” Shimizu sighed in relief.

Asahi turned to face you, giving you a smile and an outstretched fist–you immediately returned it with the exact same gesture.

[idiotwhotalkstoomuch]

CW. LONG POST for the immortal!mc... I see lady yuu having a personality like toph from "Avatar the last Airbender". People are careful around her do to her status and doesn't know why she likes to hang around adeuce and grimm, but she likes how open they're around especially when grimm calls her "his henchmen".

Immortal!mc: *has been calling grimm for an hour* GRIMM!

Grimm: *ignores her*

Mc: *sigh* *dramatically* Oh the great and powerful grimm lord of flames

Grimm:*smugly* hmm~yes~

Sebek: *windows exp crashing noises*

Has a Harry Potter the Half Blood Prince moment in alchemy class.

Mc: *reading potion text book* *under her breath* cut up the moon bloom? You crush the moon bloom *notice a lot incorrect information in the text book* CREWEL!

Crewel: *walks over* yes mistress yuu?

Mc: You let these children brew these potions incorrectly? I hope they haven't been drinking them!

Crewel: with all due respect mistress yuu the information in the book is correct i can assu-

Mc: I know you're not telling ME of all people the steps in the potion book is correct?

Crewel: *gulps*

Mc: you crush not cut the moon blooms and you use the blue spider mushroom and not the yellow puff ball mushroom! And the final product should be yellow and not a lilac color!

I see her having a staff or something of the like and it has everyone confused because 'she doesn't have magic' yeah she doesn't have magic but she likes to uses it like a walking stick. She likes to watch the students with Ashton during P.E occasionally hit them with her staff.

Immortal!mc: *bonks student* No your form is all wrong! *shows them correct form* DO IT AGAIN!

Somedays when Trein wants to grade papers he'll have immortal!mc tell stories of her youth, she tells the a story of a flying ship with a captain with a hook for a hand, a medicine woman of a young emperor and her ditzy henchmen, a shady voodoo man she met at a tavern, and a woman just as old as her who kidnapped a princess to keep herself young.

During chapter 5 vil catches her in the mirror chamber one day and askes her about the mirror the beautiful queen.

Mc: *walks up to the mirror of darkness, touches the side resting her head on the frame of the mirror* It's been a long time my old friend

Mirror of darkness: *appears* I you my friend I you...

Everyone in the mirror chamber: 👀👀👀

Vil: *in shock and awe* ᵂʰᵃᵗ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠᵘᵘᶜᵏ..

During chapter 6 Vil comes to yuu during vdc training camp and askes her questions about her relationship with the mirror of darkness.

Vil: Miss yuu can I ask you about the mirror.. again?

Mc: *puts down her tea* oh yes! I never did answer your questions earlier

Mc: long ago I heard whipers in a village that a house deep in the forest lived a very handsome man who had magic... he had a daughter a real daddies girl.. I found her odd at first as she'd ask him everyday if she was beautiful and he'd reply 'the fairest in the land'

Rook: *knows where this is going*

Mc: but like most people around that time he became sick. One day me and the girl went around the forest collecting herbs for his medicine... when we came back he gone all that was left was a pile of his clothes and a mirror..

Kalim: *blinking back tears* then what happened 🥺

Mc: the poor thing was inconsolable.. she locked herself in her father's room and refused to comeout. Though I should have told her but I found a letter from him, detailing what he had done.

Deuce: *on the edge of his seat* them what

Mc: he used the rest of his magic to turn himself into a mirror for his daughter.. i'd seen that once before when I stayed the night at a beasts castle, but thats a story for another time.

Vil: was the girl you speak of the beautiful queen?

Mc: yes her name Grimhilde... in his letter he asked if I could look over his daughter make sure she lived a happy and long life... though I feel I failed him.

KINGDOM HEARTS HAPPENS AND YOU CANNOT WILL NOT CHANGE MY MIND!

When yuu has the prophetic dreams before overblot and she's mickey in the mirror

Mc: *notices a shadow in the mirror above the fireplace* that shape seems oddly familiar...

Mirror figure: Aha

Mc: *eyes widen* KING MICKEY

Mickey:*in shock aswell* YUU!

The first years remind her of Sora and Co. and catches herself reminiscening about them. They don't know what to do when they catch her crying.

Ace: M-Mc! Are you okay?

Sebek: WHO DARES MAKE LADY YUU CRY I'LL HAVE THEIR HEADS!

Grimm: *rubbing against yuu worried* henchmen?

Mc: No no.. I'm fine it's just you six remind me of some people I knew years ago.

During history trein asks mc about the great war and if she knew the inside scoop on why it started.

Mc: which one? there have been many

Trien: many..? I know only of one..

Mc: yes! There was the first keyblade war, the first human-fae war, Chernabog's war, the inter-species war, the second keyblade war and the second human-fea war.

Lila: *who came to drop off some papers* two human-fae wars..?

Mc: oh Lila! Yes the first one is when I crowned Maleficent as queen and the second one happend when a close friend of hers betrayed her...there was to be a third on but the human queen that started it was turned into a goat

Trein: keyblade war?

Mc: when magic was just becoming accepted..*clears her throat* it was revealed that there was a secret society of heros who wielded keyblades. It was believed there was a world where all magic come from.

Ace: are there still people who have keyblades?

Mc: no.. the hearts of people to day are to dark..

Deuce: to dark..?

Mc: back then people hearts where pure, why? The keyblade wielders protect people from the darkness. The people believed in a world where all from, only the Wilders could access the world.

Trein: *writing every thing down* what was this place called?

Mc: Kingdom Hearts... but as most stories go all of them wanted control over the world, but they needed the X-blade this caused a war of cataclysmic proportions. It pushed the world into darkness and killed many and shattered the x-blade and scattered across the world... kingdom hearts was to be forever lost.

Scarabia mob: you where alive during all that!?

Mc: no, but a close friend of mine was, but I was alive during the second

Sorry for my rambling and if i broke any of the rules during this feel free to delete of so.. but This is where I'm gonna stop as I've been typing this up for the past hour or so.. 🙇🏽‍♀️🙇🏽‍♀️

No rules have been broken (I didnt have very much anyway lol)

I really like this whole post lol though unfortunately I have not seen kingdom hearts so idk a lot of references here

Also Yuu does carry a staff in formal occasions. Lilia made joke on her saying she looked like an old woman with that but was promptly shut up when Yuu recalled a story of Lilia when he was younger

[snelbz]

I'll Be Seeing You {4}

Nesta x Cassian, 1940′s AU

Collaboration with @tacmc​

Summary: After Cassian gets injured in the war, he’s taken to a war camp to be cared for until he gains enough strength to return to his battalion. While he’s there, he falls for a nurse that couldn’t care less about his title and doesn’t put up with his bullshit. Once he’s healed and the years pass by, he finds that there’s only one thing he wants to remember from the war, and she’s only a letter away.

Trigger Warnings: war

Chapters will be posted every Monday.

Word Count: 2429

IBSY Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist 

October 1940, The Autumn Court

Major Cassian Nazari was bored.

Nesta could sense it from where she was, back turned to him at the other end of the tent. It had also been a sign when she came in that morning and he was complaining, loudly, to Madja. I don’t see why I can’t get up and walk around. I’m fine. And bored shitless.

Madja, of course, had told him, Very well, Major. Do as you wish.

Cassian had taken two steps before a wave of nausea hit him from the pain, and he was throwing up his breakfast. After a dose of pain medicine, he had fallen asleep.

Now, he was awake, his pains were dulled, and he was loud.

Loud, and having a one-sided conversation with the unconscious soldier next to him about his favorite brands of whiskey.

He was just getting to the pros of living near a distillery, back in Velaris, when Nesta approached his cot. He glanced over to her and gave him a smile. A sleepy, drug-induced smile. “Nurse Nesta.”

“Major,” she replied, sitting next to his bed. “How are you feeling this afternoon?”

“Feeling great. Ready to get back out there.”

“Really now?” She asked, feeling his head for fever. He’d been warm after getting sick and she wanted to check and be sure they hadn’t missed some sign of infection setting in. His skin was cool as could be now. “So this morning was just a reaction to the breakfast porridge?”

He got quiet immediately and rolled his eyes.

“That’s what I thought.” She helped him sit up and checked the wounds on his back. They weren’t healing like she would have liked, but it was also likely he could have used stitches over a few of them. His burns were healing nicely though, even though she knew they still caused him quite a lot of pain. The broken arm and shoulder were the same.

Now that his shoulder was set correctly, it was all about keeping him still, which seemed to be a continual problem for him.

“I can’t sit here forever,” he claimed. “I’ll go insane.”

“You need something to occupy your mind,” Nesta said. “I’ll bring you some books.”

Cassian snorted. “Your romances? I’ll pass.”

Nesta huffed and shook her head. “Has anyone ever told you how difficult a man you are?”

“On many occasions,” Cassian noted. “Mostly women.”

Nesta sighed and helped him fall back against his pillows. “I’ll be back.”

“Good,” he muttered with a yawn as she walked away. After telling her fellow nurses she’ll be back in a moment, Nesta exited the tent and walked to the one just across the way from it, where the nurses slept. She strode to her tent in the far corner and grabbed an old western romance that he would surely read if bored enough, then pulled a suitcase from underneath her cot and popped it open.

The old, folded-up wooden chess board that sat inside had once belonged to her father. They used to play often, before the death of Nesta’s mother.

All the pieces were slightly dusty, but still in good shape. She picked up one of the ivory pawns, wiping it off with the apron tied around her waist, careful not to get any blood or antiseptic lotion on it. Without the dust coating it, the piece shined and she replaced it in its home before cleaning off each piece. She closed the suitcase, carrying it, the book, and a small, foldable tray back across the camp, and into the med tent.

As soon as Cassian saw her, he zeroed in on the case. “What’s that?”

“First,” she said, sitting down and holding the book out for him. “I brought you this.”

His face twisted with a twinge of pain as he reached out and took it, opening it and flipping through it. He paused on a random page and read a few lines. His eyes widened. “This is…explicit.”

Nesta’s cheeks reddened.

“It’s a romance,” he groaned.

“It’s an old western,” she defended. “It’s one of my favorites. It’s a very good book.”

Rolling his eyes, Cassian sat it on the side table, but pointed at the suitcase, which she had set down to unfold the tray. “And what’s that?” He repeated.

Nesta set it on the end of his cot and opened it. “Until I’m needed, we’ll play chess.”

Cassian stared at her for a moment before repeating, “Chess?”

She lifted a brow as she set up the board, on top of the tray. “You’re complaining about the forms of entertainment I offer?”

Cassian hesitated, and Nesta secretly liked that hesitation. For once, a comment made by her actually made him think. Usually, he was so quick on his feet. She liked it when he wasn’t.

“Fine,” he said, at last, clearing his throat. “But, it’s been a long time since I’ve played. You may have to refresh my memory.”

She suppressed her smile, moving the tray just next to his bed, so it would be within his reach. “I can do that.”

He nodded, grunting as he got himself into a sitting position. Nesta made a move toward him, but he held up a hand, letting him know he could do it on his own.

Even if it was just barely.

She laid out the pieces, almost reverently, but quickly and efficiently. She didn’t have to think about where the pieces went and before he knew it, the board was set in front of them. The white pieces sat on his side of the board, the black on her own. She gestured for him to make a move.

He reached for one of the pieces in the front, but then pulled his hand back. Twice, he repeated the movement, before clearing his throat and saying, “Ladies first.”

“That’s not how chess works, Major,” she chuckled. “White goes first, black second.”

He nodded and stared back down at the board. “Right.”

Picking up one of the pawns, Cassian moved it diagonally, as if it were a checker.

Nesta blinked, waiting for him to move it back or chuckle as if he were playing a joke. “That’s not how you move a pawn forward.”

His cheeks heated and she knew he was embarrassed. “Well not all of us grew up as well off as you were.”

Eyebrows raising, Nesta was unable to stop the surprised chuckle from bubbling from her lips. “Excuse you, sir?”

“I’m just saying, only spoiled, rich girls grew up playing chess.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, but couldn’t bring herself to be angry at his words. “You don’t know how to play chess, do you?”

“I told you I would need your help.” He wasn’t looking at her, just the board and pieces.

“When’s the last time you played chess?” She asked.

He shrugged. “Never.”

Nesta stared at him for a moment, waiting for an explanation. “Never?”

Cassian’s head fell back and he groaned. “Nurse, are you going to make me ask you to explain the rules to me or do I have to make a fool of myself any longer?”

Nesta pressed her lips together to keep from laughing. “Very well.”

She went on to explain the rules to him, then just to make sure she was not setting him up for failure, she explained the rules to him, again.

The pawn can move one square, unless it is the first time they move, then they can move two. It can’t move backwards. They can capture pieces on either space, diagonally, in front of them.

The knight moves in an L shape. Don’t ask why.

Bishop is a bit of a roamer. It can move in diagonally, as many squares as it wishes.

The rook can move both horizontally and vertically, as many squares as it wishes, as well.

The Queen is basically the best, most important piece. She can move however she wishes, wherever she wishes.

Cassian stared at the board thoughtfully. “Hmm. And the king, again?”

Nesta chuckled, quietly. “He can move only one square in any direction.”

“And he decides who wins the game?” Cassian asked, head cocked to the side as he stared at the board, trying to imagine it all.

“More or less, yes,” Nesta said, watching him study the board. “When a player attacks the other’s king, it’s called a check. A checkmate, or the win, is what happens when the opposing king can no longer make any legal moves.”

“So you must protect the king at all costs, then?” Cassian asked. “That’s the purpose of the other pieces?”

“It is,” Nesta nodded.

“And that’s why the queen is such an important piece?” he continued, meeting her gaze. “Why she has the most freedom? To protect her king?”

Nesta narrowed her eyes. “Speaking like that, I cannot believe that you don’t admire a good romance novel.”

“I already told you, I don’t think women are meant to stay home and do nothing but become mothers,” he replied, reaching out and moving his own piece properly this time. “However, a boring book about two people falling in love? No, thank you, ma’am.”

“Falling in love isn’t boring,” she defended, moving her own piece.

He grunted in answer, making his move.

Nesta looked at him, gauging his non-reply. “Have you ever been in love, Major?”

“Now who’s asking the personal questions,” he muttered, waiting for her to take her turn. She did, silently waiting for him to answer. He picked up the piece, studying the board, though barely anything had been done to need strategy yet. “No. I haven’t.”

Nesta watched him for a moment before looking back down at the board. “Interesting.”

Cassian moved his piece at last. “Don’t worry, plenty of women have been in love with me, I just haven’t returned the feeling.”

Nesta couldn’t help but bark a laugh. “Of course you would think so.”

Cassian’s grin told her it was all just a joke, but Nesta had no doubt that Cassian had had his fair share of women throughout the years.

“What about you?” He asked. “I know about your ex, of course, but have you ever been in love?”

It was Nesta’s turn to be quiet, but she pretended to be thinking over a move. “Yes,” she finally admitted, moving one of her knights, which had finally been unblocked by her pawns. “At least, I think so, at least. Things with Tom were…complicated.”

“Complicated doesn’t sound like it’s a good thing,” he replied, mirroring her own move.

She narrowed her eyes at him, finally catching on to how he’d been playing. She said nothing about the game though, and continued on. “There’s a reason we aren’t together anymore, if you recall.”

Nesta moved another piece and he asked, “Would you go back to him? If you found out he’d been waiting for you?”

“I don’t know,” she admitted, still staring at the board, if only to keep from having to look at him. “His family was much better off than mine, which was the reason for our engagement anyways. I came here to keep my sisters from having to do so.”

“That doesn’t sound like love,” Cassian murmured, taking his turn.

“And what makes you such an expert on the subject?” Nesta snapped.

Cassian slowly met her eyes once he set down his knight. He didn’t look offended by her tone. Instead, he remained quiet for a moment, then said, “I may not waste my time reading romance novels, and I may have never been in love, nurse, but I have plenty of experience in what love is not.”

She couldn’t place it, but she didn’t like why his voice became so…sad when he said it. “I didn’t mean to react in such a way,” she replied, not even paying attention to the moves she was making at this point. “I’m just not…accustomed to talking to anyone about these sorts of things. Especially a patient.”

He nodded. “I get it.”

Nesta nodded and broke his gaze as her eyes settled back on the board. After a moment, she moved her queen and said, “Check.”

Cassian blinked, eyes darting to the board, trying to find how his king was in jeopardy. Once he saw it, he tried to figure a way out of it, but after five minutes of thinking, he knocked his king down in surrender.

Nesta suppressed her smile as she outstretched her hand. “Good game, Major.”

He chuckled and shook her hand. “Nice lie, nurse.”

“Perhaps we can play again tomorrow,” Nesta asked, with a questioning tone.

Cassian met her eyes, and the edge in them softened as he said, quietly, “I would like that.”

She nodded and began putting it away as a few nurses entered the tent with big boxes in their arms. “Looks like we got some care packages from Velaris, gentlemen.”

Cassian’s brows rose, and Nesta chuckled at the excitement that flooded through the tent from those who were awake. In a war, it was the little things that made it all better.

Nesta placed the chessboard beneath Cassian’s cot and rose to help the nurses go through the boxes. With everything they pulled out, there was an announcement.

We’ve got candies!

Homemade breads and jams!

The funnies from the newspapers!

Tea!

Nesta reached into the box and pulled out a big carton and announced, “Cigarettes!”

That one got a round of applause, but nowhere near the number of cheers that the whiskey got. It went on for another few minutes, and then for the first time in quite some time, something that resembled joy could be felt in their little war camp.

As the goodies were dispersed, Nesta’s eyes kept trailing to Cassian.

She was surprised to find his eyes on her as well. Carrying one of the small bottles of the cheap whiskey that had been sent, she found herself standing beside his cot. She set the bottle down on the side table, along with a pack of cigarettes, and said, “Might not be the brand you prefer, but it’s better than nothing.”

“I’d drink anything right about now, brand doesn’t matter,” he chuckled. “If you could possibly get me some of that sweet bread and blackberry jam though, it might make it just a bit easier to go down.”

She shook her head, saying, “You’re unbelievable.” But she knew she would get it for him, she’d make sure of it.

Because his smile was the first thing that made her own appear without being forced in quite a while.

[fbfh]

I think you've horribly misread the situation [shitty roommate pt 2] - leo x reader

wc: 2.3k

genre: contemporary drama, you're definitly going to get second hand embarrassment, cozy fluff

pairing: leo x reader, attempted isabella x leo

reader: gender neutral, they/them

requested: hell yeah

warnings: mild swearing, roommate tries to steal your man once again, mentions of various mainstream vampire media (twilight, the vampire diaries etc.), brief mention of castlevania (even though i haven't seen it yet lol), breif mention of videogames and assassins creed, very mild delusion (roommate is secretly convinced leo is a vampire that's in love with her), attempted age gap relationship (she's 17 and leo's 19, he shuts that down real fast), very bad poetry

summary: You and Leo are both looking foward to spending a long weekend together, and Leo is determined not to let anything interrupt it, even if it means turning down your roommate's attempts to seduce him in the kitchen.

a/n: absolutley no hate or shade or judgement to anyone who has the same or similar traits as isabella!!!!!! at her core she's annoying because she's the antagonist, not bc of any isolated trait or traits

also she's shitty cause she keeps trying to steal your boyfriend?????

Edit: I forgot to mention before, but this is a college au where you're both still demigods, so you went to camp and on quests and stuff together

This weekend is going to be all about recharging. Recharging from the ridiculous back to back closing and opening shifts at work, recharging from having to redo that stupid project twice because your professor couldn’t decide on a clear way to define the criteria, and recharging from Isabella having her townie friend Regan over almost non stop to “completely shake up her look” as she put it.

Between the constant presence of someone you’d barely consider an acquaintance and Big Time Rush’s self titled album blasting on repeat out of her giant airpod shaped speaker, it’s been harder than usual to get in some effective self care. You have no idea how many more times you can hear the phrase “I’m going for Jade West meets Elena Gilbert, with just a little Buffy Summers” before you lose your fucking mind.

Thankfully, the hard part is almost over. There’s some minor holiday tomorrow on friday, so you and Leo both have a three day weekend ahead of you, which you intend to spend entirely together. You planned ahead, frontloading homework, chores, errands, and everything you could think of to remove anything that isn’t cuddling or playing video games and watching netflix together from your horizon.

This includes going straight from work to the grocery store to stock the fridge and get any snacks you and Leo want. You had texted him a while ago asking for anything he was craving, and head into the store with a concrete list. After a while, you circle around some aisles, avoiding the check out.

“I feel like I’m forgetting something,” you muse, knowing it’s untrue, but hoping to trigger a memory anyway. You can’t put it off any longer, finally checking out and heading back to your apartment. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t avoiding Isabella just a little.

You know bringing in all these groceries would be way easier with Isabella and possibly Regan’s help, but you just don’t have the social energy to talk to anyone, much less her, right now. By some miracle, you bring everything in yourself, and hope to get it put away before you see Isabella.

You turn to the freezer, putting away the ice cream. When you turn back around, you’re suddenly met face to face with Isabella, who has opened one of the boxes and is picking at a pastry.

“Hey girlie,” she says, elongating the hey.

“Hey,” you reply lethargically, putting the last of the groceries away. She looks at the pastry in her hand like she’s just noticing it.

“Sorry, I can’t help it, I’m italian.” She smiles, endeared by her own behavior. You have no idea what being italian has to do with asking before you open a box of your roommate’s food, but this really isn’t out of character for her. She brings up the fact that she’s half italian more than Lele Pons blames her behavior on being latina.

She’s wearing sweatpants that say chaser on the leg in red and gold varsity font, and a tight tee shirt that says “it’s okay to love them both” with silhouettes of the male love interests from one of the vampire shows she always watches. You collect the plastic bags to put in recycling, and see a piece of paper on the counter.

It reads as follows:

Drowning in my mind

No one hears me cry

Who was I before society

Before society put me in a pink dress

And handed me blonde hair dye

And told me to lose ten pounds or be labeled a freak?

The happiest people cry the most

Let the lyrics be your story

But I’m not like the other skinny blonde pretty girls

I’m

Different

-b.g. xox

You hold back a sigh.

“I think this is yours.” you say, handing it to her.

“Oh, it’s just some of my poetry I left lying around, that’s so embarrassing.”

I know, you think, you do that all the time.

“Did you read it?” She asks, hopefully.

“Nope.”

“Thank god, that would have been so embarrassing. My poetry is something really… deep, and personal to me.”

“Uh huh. Hey, I’m going to be doing a lot of self care this weekend, so-”

“Oh!” she interjects, eerily similar to Phoebe Buffay - you guess she’s been watching friends again - “I wanted to ask… is Leo coming over later?” Her voice is riddled with subtext, the expression on her face a little too invested in your answer.

“Uh, yeah. I told you the other day we’re spending the weekend together…”

She cuts you off again, a sudden, intense look on her face.

“When will he be here?”

You check your phone, scrolling through your recent texts.

“By 7 at the latest.” It’s around 6:40 now.

“Oh my god, I have to change,” she rushes back to her room, presumably digging through her recent additions to her closet.

You’re frozen for a minute after the interaction, left with a furrowed brow and the beginnings of a headache. You blink, then choose to reschedule processing why she feels the need to change for your boyfriend to a more convenient time. That’s enough of that for today. You don’t care what else happens, you’re not talking to anyone besides Leo for at least the rest of the day. You retreat to your room to finally shower and change into something comfy. As you pass by Isabella’s room, you hear her talking to Regan.

“...There’s something almost… supernatural about him.”

You bite back a laugh.

“Do you think he’s a…” Regan begins, ending the sentence with something too quiet to hear, but you’d bet almost any organ she said vampire.

So close. So, so close, and yet… here you are.

Not much later, Leo texts you to let you know he’s here. You read his text, and run out to hug him in the living room before even typing a reply. He picks you up, and spins you around. The embrace is warm and fulfilling and familiar, and you wish it would last forever.

“Hi, Sparky.” you murmur into his neck.

“Estrella…” he says, rocking you back and forth gently and pressing a kiss into your jawline, “I missed you so much.” He punctuates the sentence with another kiss, this one to your lips, and you smile more genuinely than you have all day. You’re about to agree when you remember the good news you’ve been saving to tell him in person.

“Guess what I got on sale for like, half off,” you start, excitedly, continuing at his invested expression, “the Assassin’s Creed bundle I showed you!”

“No way,” he starts, and you nod.

“I’ll go get everything set up, drinks are in the kitchen!” He watches you retreat into your room, disbelieving how he could possibly get someone as perfect as you to fall for him. He’s not going to question his luck. He grabs a couple caffeinated sparkling ices, and meets you in your room, setting down his bag and grabbing some comfy clothes to change into.

As you both get settled in, you fill each other in on all the ridiculous shit you’ve been through this week. You finally conclude the bizarre - yet somehow standard - Isabella escapades.

“So I will be avoiding all contact as much as possible,” you laugh.

“Yeah, no shit,” he agrees, “Consider me your human buffer.” You thank him, hugging him again and pressing a kiss to his lips.

The next couple hours are spent cuddling and finishing season 4 of Castlevania. Both reeling from the season finale, you agree this is a good place to take a break, get some food, and decide what game you should start with. It’s already 10pm, which most people would consider too late for dinner, but you have all weekend to fuck up your sleep schedules.

“Let’s review,” Isabella says, holding up two red lipsticks. She turns to Regan. “Which one?”

“That one,” Regan says, pointing to the one on the left, then turns to her list, and continues. “Here’s what we know; we’ve never seen him eat, and he never seems tired. He’s really smart-”

“Almost too smart,” Isabella adds, selecting black rose dangle earrings from her jewelry. Regan agrees, and continues.

“He’s almost hypnotically attractive, and his smile is a little too dazzling.”

“There’s something… supernatural about him. Like he’s not… all human.”

Regan writes this down.

“Plus he’s always wearing black and red, and those flowy button up shirts? It’s all adding up, Ree. That dream that someone was outside my window, the ring, everything…” She says, referencing the black and red cocktail ring she’d found with her stuff when she’d first moved, “I’m not saying it’s definite, just that… there’s a chance.”

“What about…” Regan says hesitantly, nodding toward your room.

“Please,” she scoffs, “he’s only with them to get close to me, like Damon and Caroline. Edward couldn’t have just approached Bella out of the blue, he had to infiltrate her friend group first, to seem less suspicious. Not to sound mean or anything, but they really don’t seem like the type someone… like him… would choose.” her voice gets dreamy when she mentions him.

In spite of having seen most mainstream vampire media almost as many times as Isabella, Regan still considers her the expert on these things, and decides not to point out that Edward didn’t infiltrate Bella’s friend group. Maybe it comes up in one of the retellings she hasn’t read yet.

“So, what now?”

Isabella sets down her lipstick, and turns to her friend.

“I tell him.”

Regan’s eyes widen.

“You’re going to tell him you know?”

“No… not yet. It’s too soon, we don’t have enough evidence. I’m going to tell him I know he’s in love with me, then once he’s secure in our relationship... we’ll see where it goes.”

She stands up, assessing herself in the mirror. She chose her outfit carefully; short red dress with black roses and black mesh collar, black rose bracelet to match her earrings, snug faux leather jacket, and black stiletto ankle booties with a very skinny heel, the zipper on the outside gold, not silver. She fluffs her wavy hair and turns towards the door. She looks back one more time, holding onto the doorway.

“Wish me luck.”

Leo enters the kitchen, seeing Isabella already there, leaning against the counter seductively. She’s wearing an outfit and jewelry this late at night that makes Leo wonder if she’s going to an emo tea party. He puts the takeout in the microwave. She’s still staring at him.

“Uh… hey.”

She lets out a dainty giggle, looking him up and down.

“... Hi.”

At a loss for words, and really wanting the awkward silence to be over, he continues, “Did you need something?”

“What I need,” she walks closer to him, tracing her finger over his collar, “is you.”

What the fuck?

His brain seems to stall for a moment, and she uses this opportunity to continue.

“I know why you’re here. I know that you’re only using them to get closer to me. I know-”

“Woah-”

“That you’re in love with me.”

Okay, double what the fuck.

She takes his stunned silence as shyness, and steps closer, putting her arms around his shoulders.

“You don’t need to play so coy, I-”

This time she’s the one that gets cut off. He grabs her arms and gently steps away, trying to make it abundantly clear that he’s not into this.

“Woah, okay, slow down. First of all, you’re 17 and I’m turning 20 in a couple months, so that’s a hard no. Second, I don’t know where you got this idea, but I am not dating them to get closer to you. We’ve known each other since we were like, 15, and have been through everything together. I’ve only known you for a couple months. I love them. Probably more than I’ve loved anything ever. I thought that was pretty obvious.”

He doesn’t want to be mean, he really doesn’t, but he can tell from the look on her face that she still thinks this is all part of some game.

“So why don’t I ever see you eat? Why are you so smart, and always up at night? I know what you are.”

He has to physically hold back a laugh. He takes a step back, and places his hands on the counter.

“Isabella, I have adhd. And I’m literally an engineering student. Why wouldn’t I be smart and have a shitty sleep schedule?”

She starts to protest, and he pulls out the reheated take out from the microwave.

“And for the record, I do eat.”

Exiting the kitchen quickly and retreating back to your room, he hands you your food.

“I got the game set up!” you say excitedly.

“Nice!”

You take one look at his face and can tell something happened. He sees this, and continues.

“I just had a very… interesting interaction with Isabella,” before he finishes the sentence, your head is already in your hands. You let out a groan.

“What did she do?” you mutter from behind your hands.

He pulls you into his lap, rubbing your back.

“I’m not totally sure,” you laugh, “but I think she thinks I’m secretly in love with her…” you’re both laughing before he can even finish the sentence.

“No…” you laugh, “no fucking way…”

“Believe me, I put an end to that as soon as it started.”

“Oh, I do.”

He runs his hand over your back, and you’re quiet for a moment.

“You know,” he continues, “I think getting our own place has definitely moved up the priority list.”

You couldn’t agree more.

[dreamifics]

Love and Monsters

Steve Harrington x Reader!Henderson

Oneshot

Y/N Henderson's life was not like any other normal teenager's life, on a very young age her only friends was her brother, Dustin and his friends.. She was not popular in highschool, but she was not a nobody neither.. Y/N was just invisible, lost in the sea of students.. She was almost through highschool though, one day her life was turned upside down, literally and figuratively.. It's been months since the 'thing' happend, but she was still shaken up.

Y/N was laying in bed, My Generation blasting from her stereo.. She was home alone, her mother was out with some friends, her brother was hanging out with 'King Steve'.. Ever since Steve helped them about Dart, she grew closer to Steve but their short lived friendship ended when Dustin left for camp and Steve worked on their family business while she was stuck preparing herself for college.. Y/N misses Steve, his unfunny jokes and oh god--his laugh..

A loud knock startled her, she shot up from her bed, memories of what happend was flashing back to her.. Despite what she tells her friend, she was not okay.. She almost died twice and that opened up trauma's and issues within herself..

Another loud knock startled her, Y/N shakes her head and just ran to the door.. Reaching their front door, her icy hands made contact with the cold steel knob..

It revealed a disheveled Dustin and Steve, she could tell that there were excitement dripping all over them.. Steve was still wearing his sailor work uniform, he looked cute to Y/N but she once threw that thought in the back of her mind..

"What's up?" She questioned the two.

Dustin just smiled and pushed pass her, while Steve was reluctant to go in.. Steve avoided Y/N for almost the whole summer because of the daunting realization that he was catching feelings for her and that scared him.. Y/N was the kind of girl that likes to watch nerdy movies, spend hours playing games with a bunch of kids and save the world two times.. However, Steve was scared, he was still stuck in the unjustified rules of highschool and popularity. . He still wanted to be 'King Steve', but he also wanted to be Y/N's..

"Nice outfit, sailor boy.." Y/N winked and laughs at Steve, he just shakes his head and went inside their house..

Steve made his way to Dustin's room with Y/N right behind him, but before reaching Dustin's room, he passed Y/N's room.. He unconsciously stopped as he looks around, observing every corner of her room.

There were posters plastered all over her walls, books were all around her room in her bed, shelves and even floors.. In the other side she had a small collection of music that made Steve smile.. Because they had the exact same taste, she is the perfect girl.

"If you want to go in, you're free to wander around my room, anytime.."

Steve turned around to face Y/N, he misses her.. How Y/N sarcastic remarks leave her sweet lips or how she rolls her eyes whenever she see something stupid.

"I might just take you up on that.."

"Hm-mm.. You didn't even talk to me when Dustin left, you broke my heart, Steviee.." She jokes, but it sounded a little bitter.

Y/N did get hurt, Steve stopped talking to her when Dustin left, it seems like Steve didn't really like her as much as she thinks he did. Y/N was bored and got stuck just studying and sometimes hanging out with the party.. It was fun but she was looking forward to hanging out with Steve.

"I'm sorry about that, I didn't want to see my old friends hanging out with someone like yo---" Steve stopped his sentence, he didn't mean that.. His mind was a mess, he said those things because he didn't want Y/N finding out his stupid feelings

"Right..Yeah, I get it.."

"Y/N that's not what I me--"

"Cause King Steve shouldn't be hanging out with people like me?Gotcha.."

Steve didn't even had the time to reply, he was met with Y/N's slamming door.. He didn't mean that.. Steve loved hanging out with Y/N, he want to give her something special.. Steve wanted something more from Y/N.. He knew exactly what and he didn't need a reason why but Steve wanted to give Y/N something more..

Y/N was hurt, she didn't know why but Steve words brought devastation to her.. She felt disappointed and upset, Y/N was expecting something special.. She didn't know what or why but she was expecting something more from Steve.

Y/N was dropping off Dustin to the mall where Steve was working, her lips were in a unsual frown.. Y/N wasn't usally like this, she was having a bad week, Steve just hurt her feelings and she was taking it much harder, it was very unsual.. The two Henderson was making their way to the Scoops Ahoy shop, Dustin was rambling about a message he picked up while contacting his girlfriend.

"Are you listening?" Her brother asked as they reach the store.

"Yepp, you should go in now.."

"Y/N, this could be a good thing!"

"I know..If you need my help, you can find me in the food court.."

"Y/N.."

"Yeah, Dus?"

"Are you okay?"

Y/N's mind went blank, she hated lying to her brother but she didn't want to worry anyone.  She laughs and messed Dustin's hair.

"Of course.. Now go, you know where to find me.." With that she left..

Y/N was not okay, the last time she slept was a month ago.. Nightmares kept crawling back to her, she was growing more paranoid by the day.. She was not okay, but she couldn't tell anyone that.. Everyone else is okay, even Wil who had it more rough than her. And to top that up, she was broken hearted by Steve's rejection of their friendship.. Y/N just massaged the bridge of her nose, when will she be fine?

Dustin and Steve was in the corner of the mall with binoculars in their eyes, Steve saw Y/N.. Sitting alone in the corner, a walkman in her ears and a book in hand.. Y/N was mouthing the word as her eyes read every word on that book and Steve couldn't help but feel all giddy and guilty inside.

"You see anything?" Dustin snapped Steve back to their current task.

"Uh, I guess I don't totally know what I'm looking for.'' Steve answered honestly, Y/N distracted him again.

"Evil Russians."

"Yeah, exactly. I don't know what an evil Russian looks like."

"All blond, not smiling."

"Mm-hmm?" Steve's eyes didn't looked for any Russians, his eyes drifted to Y/N spot but she was gone.. Where did she go? He couldn't help but worry, was she talking to someone else?

"Also, look for earpieces, camo, duffel bags, that sort of thing." Dustin added.

"Right, okay, duffel bags." Steve darts his eyes away from Y/N seat but it only fell on a girl he asked out earlier.

"Oh, you've gotta be kidding me." Steve mutters.

"What?" Dustin questioned.

"Anna Jacobi's talking with that meathead Mark Lewinsky."

"If you're not gonna focus, just gimme the binoculars."

Dustin got annoyed by his distracted partner, he should have brought his sister along.. But he knew that Y/N was not okay, she seemed distant and lost in her own mind.. Always spacing out and Dustin can hear her cries from his room, it killed him to see her loving and hyper sister transform into a walking corpse.

"Aw, Jesus Christ, whatever happened to standards?"

"I mean, Lewinsky never even came off the bench." Steve rambled on, annoying Dustin.

"Dude, you are the worst spy in history, you know that?"

The two fought for the binoculars, but they just looked stupid.. Dustin initially gave up and gave the binoculars to Steve.

"I don't get why you're looking at girls. You have the perfect one in front of you."

"Seriously, if you say Robin again..." Steve closes his eyes waiting for Robin's name to come up but it never did.

"No, Y/N.. My sister.."

Steve's heart clenched at the mention of her name, he wants Y/N too.. What can he do? Y/N hates his ass now, he was a jerk and he didn't deserve Y/N.

"No, man, she's not my type." Steve answered while he diverts his eyes away from Dustin.

"I saw you staring at her closed door for about 5 minutes."

Steve eyes grew wide at the realization that Dustin was watching the whole time.. Dustin just shakes his head, if he was asked he'd say that her sister felt the same way..

"She's not even... in the ballpark of what my type is, all right?"

"What's your type again? Not awesome?"

"Thank you."

"Hm."

"For you information, your sister is too sarcastic, she's too nerdy for me.."

"Also, she's too...boyish.."

Beautiful, that's what he wanted to say..

"Dude, that's my sister you're talking about, and besides she's not like that.. She's nerdy but so what? Y/N's also not boyish, she's just secured with her masculinity.."

Dustin's word echoed throughout Steve's system, he already knew that.. But somehow hearing it from another person's perspective made him like you more.

"Y/N's just not my type.." He lied..

Y/N was everything he ever wanted in a girl.

"Thanks for the clarification, Harrington." A voice surprised the two.

Y/N was standing behind them, her arms crossed..  Steve's eyes widen in surprise, did she hear everything? He didn't mean that, what did he mean?

"I didn't mean t--"

"Dustin, if you told me you'll stalk people in malls, I should've brought you to a psychiatrist.." Y/N ignored Steve and just focused on her brother.. Y/N would be lying if she haven't felt more hurt by the words Steve dropped.. She had been listening since the talk about girls came up, Y/N spotted the two doing eccentric things and she decided to eavesdrop.

"No, it's called spying.." Dustin rolled his eyes at her sister remarks while Steve was still frozen..

"What's the difference?" Y/N asked, her eyes still focused on he brother..

"It's just different, okay? Were looking for the--" Dustin stopped and looks around to see if anybody was near..

"Russians?" Y/N continued in a loud tone.

"Shh!" Both Steve and her brother shushed her. Y/N was surpised, she glares at the two and moved closer to them.

"Fine, can I tag along? I'm bored and it'll be nice to be a national hero."

The two looked at each other, Steve was nervous.. Y/N obviously didn't want him around, but this could be a chance for him to apologize to Y/N.

"Sure, you can help us look for russians with dufflebags and camo." Dustin pulled her sister to his side.

"That's kinda racis--"

"No, it's not!" Dustin cuts her sister off making Y/N laugh..

"Whatever you say Dus.."

And that's how she ended up inside a theater with two kids and two drugged teenagere.. Y/N's breathing was heavy, they were captured by Russians just moments ago.. Adrenaline was pumping through her veins, she thought this town was finally normal again, but turns out she was wrong.. Very very wrong..

They needed to get out of this hellish mall, Y/N need to find out if there's still russians lurking out, looking for them.

"The two of you need to stay here and take care of them." Y/N instructs to her brother, she pointed at a floopy Steve and Robin.

"Wait--Where are you going?!" Dustin stopped her by pulling her arm.

"I'm going to see if those fuckers are still looking for us.."

"No, we'll come with you.."

"Dustin, you need to stay here and keep a low profile.."

"Y/N don't be a hero.."

"Hey, Dipshit!I'm not trying to be a hero, what I'm doing is protecting you guys because our two friends are drugged and beaten while we brought a little kid into our mess!And I will do everything to keep you all safe, even if that means I get hurt or killed!"

Dustin knew that there's no talking Y/N out of this, her sister was right.. Taking a deep breath, he just nods and hugs her sister..

"Just please, stay safe.." Dustin was in the verge of tears but Y/N held him tight in her arms.. Dustin pulled back, Y/N gave her brother a comforting smile, she rubbed his cheeks and pat his head.

"I'll be okay, I'm a Henderson for god's sake.."

Dustin laughs as tears stroll in his face, she kissed his forehead and walked away, trying not to attract attention.. Taking a deep breath she left the theater, she'll do whatever it takes to keep her brother and her friends.. Y/N's mind flew to Steve, she was pissed off but she was not sure anymore.. The way he saved them and got beat up for them, she couldn't find a reason to be mad at him, all she can think about is his childlish look and how hot he is in his sailor uniform. Y/N just shakes those thoughts away and tried to focus on her task..

Russians..

Steve and Robin were throwing up in a seperate cubicles, they were getting the drugs out of their system.. Retching and puking can be heard all through out the theater bathroom, Steve groans and flushes the toilet.

"The ceiling stopped spinning for me. Is it still spinning for you?" Robin's voice can be heard from the other cubicle.

"Holy shit. No. You think we puked it all up?" Steve rested his back to the mini wall inside the cubicle..

"Maybe. Ask me something.."

"Interrogate me." Robin said in a mocking russian accent.

"Okay. Interrogate you. Sure. Um... When was the last time you, uh, peed your pants?"

"Today."

"What?"

"When the Russian doctor took out the bone saw."

"Oh... All right, my turn."

"Okay. Hit me."

"Have you... ever been in love?"

"Yep. Nancy Wheeler. First semester, senior year." Steve imitates a gunshot.

"Are you still in love with Nancy?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I found someone else, she's a little bit better for me.It's crazy. Ever since Dustin got home, he's been saying, 'You know, you gotta find your Suzie. You gotta find your Suzie.' "

"Wait, who's Suzie?"

"It's some girl from camp, I guess his girlfriend. To be honest with you, I'm not 100% sure she's even real."

" But that's not- that's not really the point. That doesn't matter. The point is, this girl, you know, the one that I like, it's somebody that I... didn't even talk to in school. And I don't even know why."

"Maybe 'cause Tommy H. would've made fun of me or... I wouldn't be... prom king. It's stupid. I mean, Dustin's right, it's all just a bunch of bullshit anyways. Because, when I think about it, I should've been hanging out with this girl the whole time."

"First of all, she hates me now because of a stupid thing I said but when we hanged out, we were bonding and shit.. She was perfect for me, she's nerdy, hangs out with kids too much.. She likes the same things I like, her brother is my bestfriend.. Sometimes I wonder if she's real, because she's too perfect."

"Wait--You like Y/N?"

"Yeah, ever since last year.. I like her so damn much, I can't even believe that I said to her that I shouldn't be hanging out with someone like her."

"YOU SAID THAT?" Robin's voice boomed out all over the bathroom, Steve just sighs and slids out of the cubicle..

"Unfortunately, yes.."

Steve slid in to Robins cubicle, she was glaring at him.

"If you ask me, Y/N doesn't deserve someone like me.. She--She's too nice to be caught up in my miserable life.. And besides she would never like me.."

"I think you're still high.."

"No, I'm not.."

"Do you remember what I said about Click's class? About me being jealous and, like, obsessed?"

"Yeah?"

"It isn't because I had a crush on you. It's because... she wouldn't stop staring at you.."

"Mrs. Click?" Robin chuckles and just shakes her head.

"Y/N Henderson, I wanted her to look at me. But... she couldn't pull her eyes away from you and your stupid hair. And I didn't understand, because you would get bagel crumbs all over the floor. And you asked dumb questions. And you were a douchebag. And- And you didn't even like her then and... I would go home... and just scream into my pillow."

"But Y/N's a girl.."

"Steve.."

"Oh.."

"Yeah, now listen..Don't give me the 'she doesn't deserve me' and 'she doesn't like me back' crap.. Y/N was inlove with you since highschool, now you will tell her all about your mushy mushy feelings and you'll two will get married, have kids and you'll have me to thank for. "

"But what about you?"

"Please, I moved on.."

"Really?"

"Hell yeah, with my pretty face?I could find someone in a jiffy!"

The two were laughing when Dustin and Ericka burst into the bathroom.. Annoyance and frustration written all over their face..

"Okay.What the hell?!" Dustin asked very annoyed.

"Dude, we're normal again.."

"That's not the problem now, we need to find Y/N and go with the rest of the party."

"Y/N's not with you?"

"Do you see her?" Erica asked with the normal sass in her voice. Robin rolls her eyes at Erica who just glares at her.

"Where did she go?" Steve ignored Erica's sarcastic question

"She said she'll check the perimeter, but she hasn't come back since." Dustin answered, she was worried for her sister.. In their situation, who wouldn't?

"Shit." Steve and Robin both utter at the same time.

Y/N was changed into a much more inauspicious clothes, it was just some pants and a shirt tucked into it.. She fixed her disheveled hair and wiped her sweat.. She needed to blend in, her eyes wander around the mall.. There were Russians walking around, bviously looking for someone and that someone was them.. All the exits are heavily guarded by guards, there's no way out..

Taking a deep breath she walked back to the theater, praying that her brother and friends was safely still there but before she could even reached the theater, a russian man spotted her..

"I got eyes on one of the target!" The russian said into his earpiece, making Y/N run to the higher level of the mall, her heart racing and she was starting to feel tired.

Y/N just ran until she lost the russian, her breathing was getting shorter by the second..  Y/N's leg was starting to hurt but she ignored it and looked down to see if she can spot her brother..

And there they are, getting chased by guards.. Worries pumped into her brain as they run.. She needed to help them, if not they could get killed.

"Hey stupid spies!I'm right up here, morons!" Y/N screamed at the top of her lungs as she waves her hands around..

Steve and Dustin was horrified as they hide into the counters, Y/N was risking her life for theirs..

The guards that was chasing them made eye contact and targeted Y/N but before they could do anything a car honk.. The russians looked at each other, confused and dazed.. Eleven can be seen controlling the car, she throws it at the bad men and all they could hear were groans..

Y/N felt a surge of relief, she made her way to her brother.. Dustin, Robin, Erica and Steve pop out from behind the counter, steam hissing.. Y/N saw her brother and they all rushed up to hug her..

A tight hug welcomed Y/N, but this hug wasn't just from Dustin.. It was also from Robin, Erica and Steve.. Suddenly they all look up to see the rest of the party.. The hug was cut off by Dustin running to hug Mike and Eleven.

"Lucas?" Erica saw her brother and it made Lucas confuse..

"What are you doing here?"

Y/N who was just taking in deep breaths smiled to herself.. They were safe, but she knew this was not over.. Steve stayed in Y/N side, Robin's word replayed in his mind.. This is his chance to say his undying love to Y/N.

"Y/N?"

"Hmm?" Y/N saw Steve besides her, she was growing tired but Y/N needed to keep thriving for everyone.. Y/N saw that Steve was hesitant, he was nervous and it made her felt nervous too.

"I--I uhh.." Steve mumbles, his tongue was backing out.. Y/N had such a powerful effect on him, to the way she says his name, and everytime Y/N calls him, his heart skips a beat.. It sounds corny, but it was true..

"What?Do you need a speak and spell?" Y/N joked, it didn't help a struggling Steve.. He started to grew more anxious, he needed to get this off his chest.. This could be the last time they all see each other alive, there's no telling what could happen to them.

Y/N was just staring at him

"I have something to confess---"

Steve was cut off by El who was in pain and grunting in the floor..  They all ran to her aid and helped her with the pain she was going through.. Steve slightly curses at himself, maybe this was not a great time for a love confession.. He needed to focus on surviving this hellish adventure.. Again 

It finally ended.. Y/N was relieved, it was over.. They were safe, Y/N and Dustin were sitting in the back of an ambulance, a blanket around them as they hug each other..

"If this shit happens again, we're moving.." Y/N jokes.. Dustin chuckled, maybe they should.. However, the adventures were growing more fun and dangerous..

"Nah, we love being heroes.."

Y/N laughs as she held her brother tighter, she fixed his hair and wipe some dirt off his face.. Even if he's old now, he'll always be Y/N's baby brother.. She smiled at the memory of Suzie and Dustin singing in the middle of mayhem and chaos.

"Stooop, I'm all grown up now!" He stood up and made his way to his friends..

"Don't get too far, lover boy!" Y/N shouted causing Dustin's cheek to blush..

Y/N sighs at the sight of her brother walking away from her, this is the last time she'll save the world, she was tired of monsters.. Y/N was just enjoying the cold air of the night when someone cleared their throat.

"Hello to you Harrington.." Y/N smiled at Steve, he was just standing infront of her.. Y/N can't help but feel giddy when Steve's in his sailor outfit.. It saddens her that Steve was still stuck in his highschool mindset..

"I have something to tell you.." Steve mumbles incoherently, but Y/N understood it.. Steve was always nervous when Y/N's around, he remember the first time he saw Y/N..

Steve saw Dustin on the street asking for help, and he didn't believe at him first but he was soon convinced by how Dustin was nervous and scared.. They pulled up at the Henderson's residence, that's where he first saw--no that's not the right word..

That's where he first acknowledged Y/N..

She was sitting on the porch steps on her pajama's, there were dirt on her face and her hairs a mess.. Y/N's face lighten up when he saw Dustin getting out of the car..

"Hey Dus------What is he doing here?" Y/N's face dropped when he saw Steve also getting out of the car.

"He's our back up.." Her brother answered short and continue walking into the entrance of the basement.

"I'm back up..'' Steve said cocky at Y/N, she just scoffs and followed Dustin..

"For a guy with a black eye, you're awfully confident.."

"That's what seeing a pretty girl like you does to me.." Steve didn't know what he ate that time but he had this whole new confidence when he started talking to Y/N.. However, Y/N didn't seem impressed to his corny jokes and pick up lines, she was always scoffing and rolling her eyes..

"Yeah, you said that too when we were inside..That" Y/N's voice pulled him back to the present.. Y/N gestured at the burning mall infront of them.

"Yeah.." Steve cleared his throat, he opens his mouth, but the words won't come out he's chokin', how, everybody's jokin' now, the clocks run out, times up, over, blaow   .

"Are you gonna say something?" Y/N was starting to get nervous, did she do something to make Steve act strange? He was shaking, the sweat on his forehead is flowing like the Niagara Falls.. That's not attractive yet for some reason she found it hot..

"Oh--Yeah--Uhh.." He failed to say words again, why can't he just go straight to the point?

Robin who was with the rest of the party was staring at a stuttering and nervous Steve.. The rest started to notice even Jonathan and Nancy who was in each others arms..

"When is he gonna tell my sister that he likes her?" Dustin ponder as he stares at the two..

"I don't know, he's taking forever just uttering one sentence.." Lucas pitched in making the others laugh..

"I thought Steve was a suave and cool guy?" Mike jokes causing some of them to laugh, some was just quiet.. They were still having a hard time grasping all of this, especially Max..

"He's a nerd just like you guys.." Nancy answered, they all shake their heads as they watch Steve nervously fidgets..

"Alright, I finally had enough.." Robin whispers, the party turned to Robin, carefulky watching to what she had under her sleeves..

"HEY Y/N!" Robin shouts..

Y/N broke her gaze with Steve and brought it to a shouting Robin, not far from them.. Steve just froze to his place, panic started blaring out through his mind..

"WHAT STEVE'S TRYING TO SAY IS HE FREAKING LIKES YOU!" Robin shouted, and it all made them freeze.. Y/N blinked rapidly, did she hear that right? Steve l-likes her? What? When? How? Where?

Steve felt embarrased, he wanted the crawl in a hole and die.. Robin was dead to him, how could she do that? Now Y/N's gonna start to avoid him, she obviously doesn't like her back.

"I-Is that true?" Y/N finally asked the question she was dying to ask, she never really thought about Steve that way.. Fine, she's not gonna lie, there were some thoughts about Steve that kept her up at night..

"I can explain--If you don't feel the same it's totally fi----" Steve panicked and randomly said any excuses he can think off, not giving Y/N a chance to speak..

Y/N rolled her eyes at how Steve was rambling on, she smiled and stands up.. Pulling Steve sailor outfit, she kissed him..

Steve pressed his lips harder on Y/N, he wanted this kiss to happen since he first saw her.. And now it's happening, Y/N puts her arm around Steve's neck.. This was her first kiss and she was glad that it was to Steve.. They both kissed as the burning Star Court crumbles infront of them.  Y/N didn't knew that you can find love and monsters in this terrifying situation..

Dustin groaned at the sight of her sister and bestfriend kissing, he wanted to vomit and scoop his eyes out.. This was not a sight for sore eyes..

"Ugh!I don't want to watch my sister exchange salivas with Harrington!" Dustin sigh under his breath

"Get used to it, you'll be seeing a lot of him.." Robin teased making Dustin die inside.

"Dammit!"

Y/N was just thinking that some people lost someone special, Eleven lost Hopper.. Max lost Billy and the rest will wake up in the morning with terrible memories haunting them everyday, they can no longer feel the assurance that they're safe in the quiet town they grew up to. They knew everything that lies withing the depths of this ground, all the horrible things that Hawkin Labs brought.. Chief Hopper and Billy Hargrove died for them, they were heroes.. And the sad part is, no one will ever know.. Those who deserves to be recognized is no longer here, the heroine act they did save the world yet the world doesn't even know about them.. But Y/N and the rest knows that the sacrifices they made won't go to waste, they'll do everything in their power to keep whatever haunts this eerie town at bay.

I found this highly nice but cringey at the same time so bear with it, I also wanted to update my series about James Potter but I just can't seem to end it ughhhhh..Anyways, I hope you guys like this one..

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19 - The Dynamic Duo V Montreux

Hello folks. I was sitting around twiddling my thumbs and I thought I would give the old hard drive a clean up, so before I dump a load of rubbish I thought I'd better answer these before I throw everything in the recycle bin. Let's start with a lady from New Jersey who goes by the name of Dorothy who gave me a very interesting offer for the next time I'm in New York. If you're reading this Dorothy, could you send Jacky your email address so I can reply to you. I've just opened up a "secret" Hotmail account so I can send replies without pestering the lovely Mrs Smith all the time, and to test it I went to the guestbook and picked a few names at random. Maybe I should reply to the irate drummer, but if I do that he'll just reply to me and the girls in the office will miss out on laughing at him as well. Staying with the skin bashers for a mo, Ron Hansen in Madison is a drummer, and said he liked my jokes and reckons Mr Irate uses three sticks, two in his hands and one up his arse (his words not mine). Would I be correct in saying your a Zep fan Ron? Today's question is, "What do you get if you cross a drummer with a roadie?" The answer is a stupid roadie.

Moving on, last time around I mentioned a drink which we consumed in Brazil, and the charming Sonia and Dina informed me it was called Caipirinha, and a pleasant little tipple it was to. Somewhere in Australia there is a lady called Karen who is listening to the Offspring CD non-stop, so I'm gonna have to try and answer her question as she has such great musical tastes, even though she wants to know the..........(flashing lights, fireworks, drum roll) Hoover Salesman Story. ARGHHHH. Its actually a very short tale, and I think it's quiet boring but it seems to have grown in stature over the years, and as always I'm gonna drag it out and start from the first skiing expedition that I ventured on with RT.

Having checked my trendy little biog mag, I reckon the year is 1980, and the dynamic duo are in Montreux putting the finishing touches to Fun in Space and we have a few days off before a tour starts in Zurich when Rog says, "Let's go skiing." He had skied a few times before and was ok at it, but I had never put a pair of skis on in my life. I said, "Lets go, but you ski and I'll just get pissed." He then went on about what a buzz it is and how I would love it, etc. As we were touring soon our American crew had to fly out, so I called up Jim Devenney and told him to come over a couple of days earlier cause we were gonna ski. Jim is a great skier and was on the first flight available and I picked him up at Geneva airport ready for some fun. That night we hit the town and have too many drinks and Rog goes off to bed semi early, while Jim and myself sat out on the jetty of Duckingham Palace with a ghetto blaster, Derek and Clive tapes, and a vat of wine singing disgusting songs at full blast, which must have echoed over to France. Suddenly we hear a French voice screaming at us and we have no idea what he was saying so we carried on goofing around, and the next thing I hear is a huge splash as Devenney falls in.

Let me assure you that a drunk trying to get a drunk out of Lake Geneva is not an easy task, but we succeed and head back to DP and retire to our rooms. I'd just got into bed when I hear a crash and go to investigate, only to find JD had gone in the wrong room and was trying to get into a baby's cot, and getting him out of there was harder than getting him of the lake.

Next day Roger, Dave Richards, his wife Collette, Jim and myself set off to Zermatt, and on arrival we stock up on skis, passes and other skiing paraphernalia (big words now!) Dinner, drinks and off to bed. Next morning we're up and ready to go, and thinking I'll never ski again after this I refuse to waste money on a ski suit, so I wear jeans. My second wrong move, the first was agreeing to go. The hotel owner wouldn't let us leave the hotel without first drinking a couple of Sambuccas, not my idea of a good breakfast, eggs, bacon, tea, toast and Italian liqueurs, but who are we to refuse. Next I've got to try and walk in those godamn boots, and we eventually arrive at the top of the Matterhorn.

The OK skiers, RT and Dave set off on their own, Collette begins a very slow trip down while JD tells me he'll stay and teach me. On go the skis, and down I go, flat on my arse. Up I get and I'm off, for all of about 2ft before I'm down again. This is not any fun. After a couple more tumbles my great mate Jim said, "If you're gonna f*** around I'm going." And thats the last I saw of him all day. Thanks pal. I'm standing there watching people ski and think, "It can't be that hard. If you stand like this, lean like that, you can ski." So I stand and lean in the correct positions and I'm away, screeching down a mountain with only one very small problem, I have no idea how to turn or stop, so as I'm flying past Collette, and she reckons I looked very worried, I yelled for some advice and all she said was, "DIVE." Sound advice, so thats what I do, and by now I'm getting wet. I wait for her and then we set off together, the blind leading the blind, with me diving at the slightest bit of speed or bend in the piste. A million years later we eventually reach the bottom of this awful slope and it's finally over. Wrong. Theres a T-bar to get on so we wait in line till it's our turn. You're supposed to put the bar just under your bum and it drags you up, but I'm 6ft and Collettes about 5ft 5in, so the bar was either in the middle of her back or around my knees, and no one told me not to sit on the f***ing thing and we bounced around for a while until we fell off. I'm now getting really pissed off with all this, "Get me a helicopter," I demanded from Collete. She told me they don't just send them, you have to be hurt. I replied with, "I'll break my f***ing arm but I've gotta get off this mountain." Realising I'm not getting a copter I light a ciggie and ponder.

We agree to split up and go with someone our own height, so I ended up with a great German guy who was really helpful. Once on the T-bar I can see that it goes way up and I would have to ski back down to base camp, and in case you've forgotten, I can't ski, so I said that I was gonna bail out, and jumped off. I then head of in a straight line to the cable car, skis on the shoulder and wading through 3ft of snow in a pair of very heavy and very cold jeans. What seemed like hours of wading I make civilisation and head to the bar for a triple strength coffee and a triple scotch while everyone gawked at me cause I looked like I had a shower fully clothed. Yeah, I wanna do this again.

Dinner that night was great fun for the others cause they got to take the piss out of me. Their day will come. The rest of the nights activities shall remain sealed away, but a good time was had by one and all. The tour went smoothly and I try and put Zermatt behind me, except Collette, still to this day, takes great delight in telling everyone about it, and everytime she says it she makes me look more and more pathetic.

The next winter appears and I'm at home and the phone rings, "CT, wanna go skiing?" To which my reply was nothing like, "Oh I'd love to you fabulous little drummer boy." I can't believe he talked me into it again, but this time we were gonna do things correctly and go to Aviemore in Scotland and take lessons, this was the saving factor in his plan. So once again we pile into the Range Rover and aim north. We split the driving (for a change) and had a good journey up through the snow covered mountains till we get to the resort. A usual night was on the cards, dinner, drinks and bed, then up bright and early for some lessons and a good day on the slopes. This time we've both got the correct outfits so we head off to where our little group of idiot skiers are. We're all standing in a line, with Rog and me at the end, and each person gets to snow-plough a few feet. These clowns have less idea than my first try, and it's also incredibly cold and we've now got icicles hanging off our hair. It's our turn and we both look like olympic champions, but the only thing wrong with getting it right the first time is that the instructor then turns his attentions back to the start of the line. Here I am once again standing on the top of a mountain, freezing cold with two 'things' stuck on the end of a pair of stupid boots, and I inform His Royal Highness that the next trip away involves sand and sun, no excuses, end of argument. RT agreed that this wasn't much fun and thought my idea worth considering.

We finally heard the two magic words, "Lunch Break." We're gone in search of some good HOT food and a nice beaujolais, and we found both. We also found that the hotel bar had an amazing selection of whisky, and we had to try as many as possible. We're now semi pissed and decide that as we're warm we might as well go back to this lesson even though we are very late, and the instructor looked at us and said, "Where have you two been?" Rog came back with "Trying lots of your wonderful scotch's." He was fine with that answer and we carried on trying to learn something, and would you believe by the end of the day I could actually turn and stop.

Back to the hotel for a nap before dinner. Over a very nice meal and a couple of little drinkettes we agree that it's far to cold here and we'll clear off the next day, so into the bar we go with our earlier mission of trying all the scotch's. We were sitting at a table chatting away and cracking jokes with each other and end up talking to the couple on the next table, swapping skiing stories, needless to say mine were very short, and having a bit of a laugh, when the woman said, "What do you two do for a living?" God knows why, but I said; "We're Hoover salesmen." At first they didn't believe us but we both started going on about the difference between domestic and industrial cleaners, uprights, backpack types, ones you pull along the floor. We went on about the different wattage, suction power, the amount of pressure on Axminsters and Wilton carpets, even a couple of car expressions like overhead this and thats. What the hell do we know about vacuum cleaners? But boy are we good at this. After about 30 mins of utter bullshit the subject finally changed and they wished us all the best with our door to door salesmanship and off they went to bed. We then had to reassure each other what we actually did for a living, had some more drinks and tried to work out how we knew so much about cleaners as both of us have spent most of our lives trying to stay well away from them. We spent the drive back to London having a good laugh about the one day we spent in a Scottish ski resort.

Well that's it folks, the story of a small company, R & C Taylor,..... Hoover Salesmen. I did learn to ski quite well, and whilst in Gstadd doing the Shove it album Spike flew out cause he fancied learning to ski, and the fool asked me to teach him. I wasn't much help because everytime he fell over I burst out laughing cause I kept seeing myself in Zermatt, and Spike looked just as worried and stupid as I did.

Before I go I noticed that Jacky had to get her boiler fixed and said for me not to make a comment, but little things like that spark me off and I remembered that when we were recording in the Townhouse Studios I had a little, no a big affair with the studio chef. Every three months Virgin would do a magazine for all their staff, written by all the heads of various departments, airlines, studios, video, shops, films, etc. and they would say what was going on with their particular section. Alan Douglas, who was chief engineer of all Virgin studios wrote who was recording where, and he wrote, "Queen are in studio 4, and Crystal, their main man is stoking the kitchen boiler." I thought that was hilarious, but Jane went ballistic. That's it for now.

Loadsa luv Crystal (Carpet cleaner to the stars)

[oh-styles]

Something About a Beginning: Part II

First off, I want to thank each and every one of you for your immense patience. (More so than others, but I digress.) Writing on such topics when you yourself aren’t in the most healthiest mentality is a struggle alone, but we got here. 

Second off, if you haven’t read the first part, you can so here. These chapters implicate bouts of depression and talks of miscarriage, so read at your own will. 

I do want to note that I mention Robin in this story, and I was hesitant to include him because I felt it wasn’t appropriate, because he shouldn’t be used as entertainment purposes (i.e. in stories) but I mention him only with love and respect.

Again, thank you for your patience, and happy reading.

July 3, 2019 London, England

Harry lost his girl.

She vanished in the night – gone with the wind – and all that remained was a ghost of a woman, transparent and bleak. He hasn’t seen her smile since that night, coming close to a week now, and his gut retches at the thought he might never get his girl back.

She’s buried herself in the sheets; the window is opened a crack, and he spots an empty bottle of melatonin laying overturned on her bedside table. He stares intently at her body, watching as the sheets rise and fall to the pattern of her placid breathing, and he thinks for a moment that she’s finally found herself a better place. Not dead—not by any means. Whatever dream world she has found herself delved in, he knows she might have found a sliver of peace there, hopefully smiling.

“She’s sleeping, mum.” Harry says into his phone, taking a step back to gently close the bedroom door. “Rande and Cindy invited us to Muskoka but…” His words hung in the air, like the elephant in the room, but his mother knew all too well what was lingering on the precipice of her sons’ tongue.

But she’s too depressed.

But she can’t go a day without crying.

But I don’t think she has the energy to leave the house.

It’s been four days since the attack, and Harry hasn’t seen her take a step outside of their bedroom.

“Love, she’s wasting away in there. It might help her a little to get out, get some sun…”

“Mum, I can’t even get her to sit in the fucking garden.” He can hear his mother’s nettled sigh on the other end of the line, but how can anyone expect him to put her on a mother fucking airplane if she can’t even bother to walk the 30 meters to the fucking garden? “The sodding paps were outside the house last night.”

“They can’t—”

“I’m aware.” He begins to descend his way down the stairs, stopping to peer out from the front window – an old, worn out habit. “I think it’s best we get away for a bit. The story hasn’t died down… I think it’ll help—getting away. They won’t bother us there.”

Harry knew your answer before he even had the chance to ask; he knew he was wasting his time in even suggesting such a thing, but the guilt would eat away at him if he didn’t even try.

“Muskoka…Canada, remember? We went there last year.” He sat at the edge of the bed, running a hand over the sheets where a peek of your shoulder laid exposed. “It’ll be quiet. Nobody there to bug us. If you want to just hang out in the hotel room the whole time, I’d be fine with that. It’s just…”

I can’t stand to see you burrowed away another day.

“I’m really worried about you… I’m just trying to help.” He was powerless, and he knew it. He couldn’t take her by the arm and force her on a plane, but god forbid he try his damned hardest. “No paps, nobody. I promise. I wouldn’t take you there if it wasn’t safe.”

He feels a stir beneath him, and from underneath the covers, a small hand inches outward and lays upward, a silent plea for intimacy—a piece of familiarity he hasn’t touched in days. He reaches out and clasps her hand in his, and readjusts himself to lay beside her.

“You can think about it. I don’t need an answer this second, but give it a day or two, okay?”

He sees her nod, and her eyes blink open to meet his, only for a second, before they are closed once again for the remainder of the night.

*

July 6, 2019 Ontario, Canada

Muskoka came and went. Nothing advantageous to really capture your attention, though you kept your head nestled low in a book for most of your stay. You tossed a couple Stephen King novels into your bags without much thought, and by the time your trip was coming to an end, you had already completed one and started another.

A photo made its rounds online of you at dinner with Harry, Rande and Cindy, and even thinking back to that night, you couldn’t recount a time where you felt a pair of eyes boring at your table. You think it might be because you paid more attention to the drink menu than your friends, but you digressed. They only saw the back of your head, and not even the photographer mentioned you. You were also mistaken for Kaia on a couple occasions.

After Muskoka, you were back in London, and not much later Harry would be jetting off to Italy for Google Camp, and a few days after that, he was set to fly to Mexico for a video shoot. He was redundant to go, and even called Jeff to see if they could reschedule, but that would cause a delay for the next video they’d film only a week later. He asked if you wanted to join him, and you kindly declined. You were much aware of his past video sets, and how common it was to see photos and videos leaked online, and you were far from interested to be included.

You were much happier to find yourself under the watchful eyes of Anne Twist.

“I can meet you in Scotland if I’m feeling up to it.” You knew it was a scorching lie crawling right off your tongue, but if it meant he carried some hope with him, then you would feed him whatever white lies you could muster. Even Anne knew better than to believe you.

“I think Canada was good for you, love, but you need some rest, too. Can’t be travelling all over the bloody world, now, can you?”

It was a nice feeling to know she had your back.

In another life would a little green monster be envious of missing such a trip to Cancun, but the only desires you had were sitting in Anne’s garden being force fed a steady cup a tea and a plate of biscuits.

Anne didn’t pry; she knew well what you needed, but she would be keeping her sons promise on keeping you safe, and she knew there was no safer place for you to be.

It was August now, and the heat felt suffocating. You and Anne spent your mornings walking to the bakery her son once worked in, grabbing a quick breakfast before heading to the park. You would pick off pieces of your croissant and toss it at the squirrels, but you almost always scared them off. Anne told stories of when Harry was a child, and how he once tried to tell her Gemma was a drug dealer.

“She was only a child,” she hummed, laughing into her coffee. “But he was always a character to have around.”

“I feel like…between you and me, right?” You could hear in the distance the sound of a goose honking and a group of children wailing, running away. “I just…don’t want to upset him.”

Anne reached over and took your hand in hers. “Anything you say is always safe with me, love.”

“I’m mad he left me here.” There was a short beat, but you could feel your throat close, and that anger begin to well up in your chest. “This…this is also…”

“I know, love.” She scooted closer, squeezing your hand. “Everyone has their own ways of dealing with grief. Harry isn’t good at sitting around… Even when Robin passed, he didn’t like to sit. He needed to go do something.”

You remember, and yet you still recall him lying on his mother’s couch in tears. You don’t think he’s cried since the two of you left the hospital a couple weeks ago.

“He loves you, darling. He calls me every day to check in on you. Don’t think for a second he doesn’t care.”

Even with her words, you felt something was missing.

*

Harry was only in Scotland for a couple days before he was finally home, but it wouldn’t be long before he would be venturing off to Italy – again – for another work-related conquest. You weren’t sure why he was so content with country hopping every couple of weeks instead of resting at home with you, but you didn’t bother bludgeoning him with questions.

“After I’m through with Italy—I won’t even be there a day—I’ll be back home, but a couple weeks later, I have to go to LA for some meetings… I’d like you to come, if that’s okay.”

Again. There’s always something. It must be so fucking difficult to stay in one place for more than a couple weeks with your grieving girlfriend.

“Also…I was meaning to ask you. Ariana is in town in a few days… Wanted to know if you wanted to come with me and the guys… I think it’ll be fun.”

“Your child died a month ago and you want to go to a fucking Ariana Grande concert.” The words fell helplessly from you, but it was weeks of anguish and neglect that hit its final tier, and you were quite tired of hanging on. “Tell me….how does that make sense to you?”

“Excuse me?” For the first time that night, he looked at you. All before, he found excuses to shift his glances to anything but you, maybe in fear of reality finally hitting him in the face with what he’s been running from for weeks, but for the first time that night, he bared his eyes down at you, and his mouth fell open.

“I’m sorry—have I been hallucinating you just picking your shit up and leaving every chance you get?”

“I’ve had work—” He took to his feet, swiftly flinging his hand out to close the lid of his luggage.

“Any normal person—I swear, any normal person would stay home, and fucking grieve, except you, who wants to fucking fly everywhere and work, because that would require facing his fucking prob—”

“I have a job—I know it’s hard for you to relate to that, but I have commitments—”

“And what am I then? If not a commitment, then what, Harry?”

“You are a commitment—”

“Then where have you been? Why have I been staying with your mother? I know you invited me to go with you, but I shouldn’t have to. I’m fucking hurting, Harry! I don’t want to go to Cancun and Italy—I want to be here with you. Do you know how fucking hard it’s been dealing with this without you here?”

For once, he was silent, but he shifted on his feet.

��You haven’t cried. Not since the hospital. I can’t count how many times I’ve cried, and you sit around texting your band or going to video shoots… If you feel nothing—no grief or anything…if you didn’t even want the baby, just tell me. Make this easier on me, please.”

“How the fuck can you say that I didn’t want the baby? My heart is fucking hurt!”

“Then act like it!”

“You really think I can sit around every day and watch you fall apart? I have to be the strong one… If it can’t be you, then it has to be me, and I don’t like watching you hurt.”

“You know…you sometimes have a really shitty way showing people you care about them.”

You stood there, arms folded in resistance, and he couldn’t take his eyes from off the floor. He felt cornered, and he was defenseless with nothing else left to give. His bags still laid on the bed, clothes scattered over the sheets ready to be put up, and you knew this room was no place for you. Your purse was downstairs, and your phone in your pocket.

“I’m going to stay with Gemma tonight. I’ll have her pick me up. Please don’t follow me out.” 

*

She’s always been the quiet one.

The first time she met you, at a family gathering you were reluctant to attend despite the persistent reassurance from your other half, she knew from the moment she saw you that you were different from all the others. You held yourself different, much shorter, like you knew you could never become the center of attention.

You studied the room, holding onto Harry’s hand as he introduced you to his mother, and that’s when Gemma appeared from over her mother’s shoulder.

“About time I meet you,” she chuckled, reaching her hand out. “I’m Gemma.”

She watches you now from the edge of the driveway, sitting on the steps of the porch with only the light above you illuminating your surroundings. From behind you, she spotted the silhouette of her brother peeking through the curtains, keeping a close eye for just in case.

Your track record wasn’t a good one.

As she approaches, you perk your head up with a sigh of relief. For the first time, she was the Styles you nothing but needed.

“Come on, Magoo,” she chirps as she finally reaches you, lifting her hand out for you to take. “We can hit the McDonald’s drive-thru.”

Laura Nyro played over her car stereo, a melodious tune you recall hearing once before on a long drive in Cheshire. You shut your eyes, and the memory floods you like a storm, like a stampede parading across your chest, and you lean over to rest your head on the window.

Gemma reached her hand over to find yours, giving it three squeezes of solace.

I. Love. You.

The cut that was tucked away in your hairline was in its last stages of healing, and a scar would most certainly take its place. You always felt the erratic throbbing, like a little reminder that no matter how far you run, your problems will always be chasing you like the devil.

“Did I make a mistake?”

Gemma turned her attention from the road, lifting your hand up with hers, and planting a soft kiss to your knuckles.

“No, Magoo. I’m sorry to tell you, but you’re dating a dumbass.” She heard a muted hum in response. “Nobody is perfect… Not even that shithead. I can see where he thought what he was doing was okay, because he was sacrificing his feelings for you, but… that’s just not how you do it.”

You could drink to that.

Gemma spotted the golden arches and took a left at the light. “I’m glad you texted me… Haven’t had a bloody girl’s night in ages. It sucks under the circumstances but…” She turned back to you with a wink. “I’ll take what I can get.”

On the journey back to her flat, you pleasantly sipped at your chocolate milkshake and tapped your feet to the music, and even sporadically hummed along to the few chords you knew. It really didn’t take much to please you.

Gemma was never gifted a sister as a child. Though, she did want one, and was thoroughly distraught when her mother brought home a brother all those years ago, she did grow accustomed and grew to love the curly haired boy who she would then share with the world. But the girl beside her, who slurped her drink and choked behind a laugh of a joke about a time traveler who walks into a bar, had burrowed herself deep within her heart, much like she does with any counterpart she meets.

It’s incredibly difficult not to meet this girl and not hold some sort of placement in her life. Her heart is massive, but the love she radiates is gracious and touches anyone who dares get too close.

And the love Gemma has for her is just as the same.

Michal was asleep when the two of you arrived; you knew your way around, and confidently walked to the spare room down the hall, last door on the right. Gemma trailed behind you, holding your milkshake as you flipped on the light, and kicked off your shoes.

Olivia was already sprawled out over the comforter.

“Could you stay with me, tonight?”

“You don’t have to ask me twice, babe.” Gemma smirked, setting your drink down on the bedside table. “Have you ate?”

You shook your head, even trying to recall if you had mustered an appetite to have some breakfast, but even then you think you took a couple bites out of an apple and forgot about it.

“I’ll make you something—actually, Michal and I have spinach ravioli left over… Want me to heat some of that up for you?”

You graciously nodded. “You’re too good for me.”

“I just love you is all.”

The next morning, the spot beside you was visibly vacant, and from down the hall you could vaguely hear a low, sullen voice talking over the sound of the television. Gemma fired back in response, and from your feet, Olivia peeked her head from the covers, turning towards the disrupting noise.

“Let her sleep—she’s exhausted—”

“Just give me five bloody minutes!”

You knew any chance of sleep you wish you had was far gone.

“I’m up—just fucking talk!” You hollered into your pillow, your eyes still adjusting to the sunlight cascading into the room. You could guess it wasn’t any later than nine that morning, and before you had a moment to check, his unquestionable footsteps neared your door, and you heard a light tap. “I’m obviously awake.”

After you walked out the night before, he ignored your wishes and followed you downstairs where the shortest reaction he got from you was the front door slamming in his face.

“Can I talk?”

I don’t know, can you?

“You literally came here and woke me up from some incredible sleep, mind you, and you’re asking me if you can talk.” He was in a blind panic and darted his eyes around the room. “Well, talk.”

“I’m a fucking twat, I know this. It’s inexcusable what I did—what I put you through—it was selfish—I’m so fucking selfish—I can’t fucking deal with this kind of stuff, and I’m a bloody twat for leaving you because I can’t handle it. It’s cowar—I’m a coward! I can’t face shit—and I love you so much, and I left you… I’m so sorry, please believe me. I’m such a twat—"

“Shut up, please—you’re giving me a migraine.” You held up a single finger as you adjusted yourself in bed. “Look, I don’t even know how early it is, and you know how much I hate mornings.”

“I know, but…I didn’t want to wait until the afternoon to talk to you.”

“That’s fair.”

“It’s 10:30 by the way.”

“Did you practice that speech in your car, or did you just wing it?”

While you were in bed with Gemma, watching King of the Hill on her iPad, Harry resided to his office where he spent much of the evening hunched over his journal, scrawling out endless messages to you about how much of a wanker he is, and by the time the sun began to rise, he had his eyes in his hand and began waiting for an appropriate time to come and see you.

“I…thought a little bit about it, yeah.”

“You really hurt me, alright? It’s not something I can just forget because you said you were sorry. When I needed you the most, you weren’t there. What kind of partner is that?” He stood silent in his spot; his hands dug deep into his trousers. Suddenly, he was a little boy again getting scolded by his mother. “I had your mom, I had Gemma, but not you. The only person I needed. I get this wasn’t part of the plan, and we got our hearts broken, but that doesn’t give you the right to run off because you can’t handle seeing me upset.”

Olivia stretched her limbs out over the covers, purring against the sheets.

“I appreciate you coming, I really do. This isn’t something I can just forget and move on from. I want to work on this, but it’s going to take time… I still love you though.”

*

September 19, 2019 Los Angeles, California

“Your shirt looks like amebae under a microscope.”

He stifled a grunt, looking down at his shirt with concentration, and every so subtly did you see him glance swiftly at the bathroom mirror. “I’m surprised you even know what ameba are.”

“Or it looks like those eye floaties you get, but…colorful, you know?”

“Will you stop bullying me?”

“Only when you tell me how much you paid for that shirt.”

For a second, and you saw it flash through his eyes, he considered telling you, but figured that was a fight for a different afternoon. His silence was all the answer you needed. You nodded and left the room.

He found himself eminently lucky that you even agreed to accompany him to Los Angeles, but it was under the one condition that he takes you to In-N-Out whenever you oh so politely asked. Though, after you harassed him over his attire that morning, he was undecided to change his mind.

He didn’t.

You did, however, apologize and say he looked like a sexy ameba, and he then locked you out of the car for five minutes.

To be fair, you only accepted his offer to travel with him because you missed your friends, and they were the one thing that remained untouched from the summer. You felt the emptiness being carried with you with every passing day, and all the books and websites said that was normal, but finding distractions and hobbies to pass the time was coming close to becoming a sport – way too laborious for you.

You even found yourself searching “Losing interest in things I used to like” and you were considerably shocked to discover the rabbit hole Google led you down.

You didn’t consider yourself depressed, not by any means. Sure, you were sad most of the day, you never really gained your appetite back, you stopped painting and watching King of the Hill and Breaking Bad, and if you didn’t spend the entire day sleeping, you would lay in bed with your eyes closed, praying you would eventually grow tired enough to slip away for a little while.

Harry even signed you both up for couple’s therapy.

“This is for people who cheated on each other and refuse to break up!”

But regardless of your inherent fussing, he refused to back down. Where the two of you stood mentally, this was your last chance at redemption, and he wasn’t letting you back out. The way he saw it, if you didn’t make an effort to try and fix what was broken, there was no hope for the relationship moving forward.

That was when you realized the outcome was more than just losing your baby.

After the first session, you made an appointment with your physician, who later prescribed not only you with anti-depressants, but Harry as well. Your world was spinning madly, in every which direction, but at least you had your boy holding on madly with you.

The first time you encountered a fan since the summer happened on that very first outing in Los Angeles when you and Harry were arriving for your lunch plans. (Not In-N-Out, but you let it go.) If it had been solely one girl, you trust that you could easily fight her off if given the opportunity. I mean, sure, you didn’t fight off that other girl, but she had the upper hand, or so you tell yourself.  

But, no, she was with a group, and you felt the urge to vomit.

“I’m going to throw up—” You propel yourself in the other direction, ready to sprint back to the parking lot, and thinking back on it now, you can’t even remember the last time you even sprinted. “Let me sit in the car—let’s get the food to go—I don’t care—”

This is why we should have fucking gone to In-N-Out.

“Pet—you can’t run forever, okay? I know it’s fucking scary, but you have to face this one day.” You remember the exact quote Harry was reciting from the therapist, just with less profanity. “I won’t let them do shit, alright?”

They did stop him, of course, and you took a few steps away so they could have their moment, but you made sure he was still an arm grab away incase—

“Hey,” You had disregarded the voice, opening a game on your phone – Numberzilla – before you registered someone had spoken to you. “I’m sorry to bother you…”

At first glance, you could easily discern she was unsure of herself. She likely had a rush of confidence, and now standing blankly in front of you, she has lost all certainty. From behind, you peered up to find Harry staring at the back of her head, already inching into his pocket for his keys.

“Oh,” you gulp, clutching your phone in your hands. “Hi…”

“I just…was just hoping that you were doing okay.”

Doing okay, because of—

Your heart thudded to a stop.

“You alright?” Harry was at your side, and the young girl took a step back.

“Sorry—I’m sorry.” She gave a weak smile. “I just wish the best for you two.”

She was already walking off when you mustered up the words to thank her, but you were doubtful she heard you. Harry��s arm was in a tight grip around your backside, with his keys hung in his hand, ready to run.

The two of you cancelled your lunch plans and hit In-N-Out instead.

*

September 24, 2019 Los Angeles, California

“Is it okay?”

It was a Tuesday; you had a clear agenda for the day, and it was a little after lunch that you found yourself aimlessly clicking through channels, with your boyfriend sitting down by your feet, flipping through the pages of your current read.

You had felt the undeniable ache since the night before, and you thought maybe if you just ignore it, it’ll go away, but it only lingered, taunting you with its insatiable lust.

The itch you don’t want to scratch.

Your heart was racing, your palms were sweaty, and it didn’t matter how tightly you squeezed your legs together, nothing could rid you of this.

“H,” You poked his leg with your toe. “Bear with me on this, okay?” He didn’t respond, but he carefully set your book back down on the coffee table. “Will you have sex with me real quick?”

“I…you want to?”

“Do you have condoms? Because if not, I can take care of this myself—”

“Yes, yes, I have them. I have—they’re upstairs.”

And there you were, minutes later, his cock was inside of you, and he slowly rolled his hips carefully into you, dipping his toes into the water. He physically cannot express how much this meant to him, and how long he hid this desire deep in his gut, because God forbid he be the one to bring it up. If he had to wank off in the bathroom in between commercial breaks until you decided you were ready to have sex again, he’d find a way to tolerate it.

“Is it okay?” He choked out in between breaths; only minutes in, and he was cradling dangerously on the edge.

“Yeah—yeah, it’s okay. It feels good.” You readjusted your hips, stretching your leg out to wrap around his. “Maybe a little faster?”

“I’ll cum in a second—” He shook his head, halting his movements when that tiny, little knot inched closer to unravelling. “Just give me a sec.”

“Babe—”

“Hold—” He reached his arm under the bend of your knee, lifting it up as he thrusted back into you. “Fuck—”

He was relentless; you stretched your hand down between your thighs, rubbing and kneading that small bundle of nerves as his cock hit deep within you with no sign of letting up.

It had been way too long.

“Harry—fuck—” It was deep, pulsating, and you lifted your hips up as your orgasm radiated throughout your every limb, tightening around his cock as he thrusted hard, giving you one last nudge of pleasure as his grip tightened around the sheets, fucking into you with a lasting, animalistic moan, cumming thick ropes into you.

You made him access the condom, triple checking there wasn’t a hole unbeknownst to either of you, and after a fourth overview, he politely asked you if he could throw away his used condom now.

You would be okay this time.

He ran a bath a little later, and you submerged your body deep within the bubbles, letting them rest at your jawline. You felt like you lost your virginity all over again.

“H?” You asked, rubbing the bubbles up your arm.

“Yes, pet?”

“Do you want to get married?”

The question caught him, and he cracked his eyes open with curiosity. “I want to, yeah. You know I do.”

The conversation had only been passed around once, when you were terribly drunk and crying over some sob film where the boyfriend dies before they have a chance to elope despite their parent’s protests. The film stuck with you for weeks, and you always wondered, if you knew you were with the one, why wait? Why wait for tragedy to strike?

“Let’s get married.”

He chuckled, wiggling his toes against yours. “You’re mental.”

“No, I’m serious. Why wait? Seriously? I love you, you love me, and we aren’t getting any younger.”

“Pet, you’re 24.”

“And only getting older!”

“So, you want to find some Little White Chapel in Vegas and get hitched?” He leaned up a little, a smirk stretching out on his face.

“I want a real wedding, of course, someday, but right now…let’s do it. Let’s go to Vegas or Miami or somewhere, and just do it.”

It took an hour, but he eventually agreed, and was on the phone with Jeff to arrange a flight and hotel. The next day, the two of you ran around downtown to every consignment shop in the city, looking for a white dress – not as hard as you thought it would be – a diamond ring – a little tough, but you found one for cheap – and a nice pair of heels in your size – a lot harder; you bought a size too big by accident.

And in 24 hours, you would be marrying your best friend.

*

Miami, FL September 26, 2019

“Shit…fuck, we’re actually doing this?” You stuffed a wad of tissue paper into the toe box of your heels – one size too big – and stood up to test them for a final time. “No going back?”

“Cold feet, pet?”

“No, I’m fucking—it’s humid in here.” You swing around to face him, fanning yourself off with a loose People magazine, and its then you see him standing smugly in his slacks, a proper grin etching itself across his face.

“Cold feet—the expression, pet…”

“Harry—fuck, I’m nervous. My shoes are too big, I feel a pimple forming on my chin, and I’m pretty sure the wire in my bra broke ten minutes ago because something is stabbing my tit.”

“Well, I think your tits look great.”

“You can thank that bombshell bra I bought years ago for that.” You stroll back over to the sofa and toss the magazine carelessly onto the coffee table. “Did you have them sign an MDMA?”

“NDA, and Jeff got that covered.” Harry combs back a piece of his hair, that one strand that always gives him trouble. “Hold onto this for me?” You watch as he removes his H ring, and strolls over to the sofa. “Put it in your bra—can’t lose much in there.”

“You’re hilarious.”

“And you’re my wife.” His fucking smug grin falls over him like a tidal wave, and you wish you could just slap it right off his face.

“No, I’m not.”  

“Give it a couple minutes.”

Your heart hurled itself up into your esophagus, the tremorous pounding radiating all throughout your head to your toes. Harry appeared quite relaxed as he staggered to the full-length mirror to adjust his collar, and from the reflection, he caught your watchful stare.

“Your mom is going to be pissed.” You think back to Anne, and all the good she’s done for you, and you are now repaying her by having her miss her son’s wedding. “We’ll need to plan the real thing soon.”

“We’ll tell her when we want to tell her, but for now,” he swung around on his heel to face you, “This is about you and me…and the rest of our lives.”

You make a mental note to thank Niall later.

You think back to those years ago, and how you almost bailed on Niall that night to stay home and watch The Young and the Restless with your roommate. You weren’t thrilled to get that phone call, but as long as Niall agreed to pay for a couple drinks, you found it in yourself to put on a pair of pants and enjoy a night out. 

And maybe if you had inclined to stay home, your entire life would be a completely different world right now. Maybe you’d be in somebody else’s kitchen helping them prepare dinner, or on some lavish vacation with a guy you only met a month ago, or maybe you’d be alone in your apartment, binging a new show to pass the time you only let flutter by.

But you were here now, standing at an alter that smelled roughly of cigarettes and mildew, wearing shoes that were too big on you, in a dress that probably saw more weddings than you ever will, holding the hands of the man you were prepared to love for the rest of your life.

Nothing seemed to matter anymore, not the harassing, not the attack, not the stalking. It didn’t matter what anybody threw at you anymore; you were hard as fucking stone, and not a single person was going to damage what the two of you were building.

“You may now kiss your bride.”

[tommodirection]

18

Louis Tomlinson x Reader

Word Count: 2.2k

Warnings: swearing, pining

Masterlist

A/N: Heylo! I hope you enjoy this! I had the idea after seeing an ad about an internship, and so this fic blossomed! I’d recommend listening to 18 by One Direction while reading if you want! It’s truly one of my favorite One Direction songs! Thank you, and have a nice day! ❤️💕🥰

—

You didn’t expect much out of your internship at the network. You thought you’d just be another coffee girl, not actually getting the experience you wanted.

But what you didn’t expect was to be put as an assistant on the X-Factor, especially when you were straight out of school, only just having turned eighteen.

You were meant to do behind-the-scenes work, which included interviews, managing hair, costume, and makeup, and sending the contestants on stage.

It was astonishing, almost unbelievable, but you were grateful for the opportunity. Honestly, you loved the job. You got paid, you were now getting the experience you wanted, you met new people every night, and the most important thing, you were doing what you loved.

The downside of the job was the nerves that overwhelmed you each time you walked in and a contestant wasn’t ready, or each time a judge came to lecture you about the presentation of a contestant. But nothing you had ever managed before would ever prepare you for what you were about to encounter.

You were assigned to managing the boys’ group at boot camp.

At first, you were excited for the new leadership opportunity, but your anxiety sank in when you realized what you were meant to do.

You were supposed to be managing all of the boys, still managing everything, but that also meant you’d be having to actually deal with them. For five hours straight.

You had grown a tolerance for people after working with some of the tech crew for the show, but even your secondary school years couldn’t prepare you for this.

You stepped out onto the stage, standing tall, clutching your clipboard tightly to your chest. The boys were all chatting and laughing with each other, none having noticed you yet.

Your eyes drifted around the room, seeing boys in little clumps, from one group you heard someone playing the guitar, that crowd being the largest.

There were a few stranglers, some standing by themselves, heads down, hands tucked in their pockets.

You stood, waiting for someone to notice you, but a minute passed and no one seemed to acknowledge you, although it didn’t help that you were shorter than half the boys in the room.

You cleared your throat, quietly at first to see who was listening, no one turned their heads.

You cleared your throat a few more times, louder with each one, but no one even turned their head. This was going to be harder than you thought.

You had enough, resorting to the thing you hated most. Yelling.

You pressed your lips into a firm lime, taking a deep breath before letting it out. “Hey!” You yelled above the noise, a majority of the boys going quiet and the chatter quickly dying out.

Most of them had turned their attention to you, and few still refusing to look up. You waited for everyone to be quiet, but someone had to ruin it.

“Hey! Shouldn’t you be with the girls group?” A boy wondered aloud, several boys nodding in agreement. “I think you lost your way, sweetheart, you don’t belong here!” He shouted louder, a few boys chuckling along with him. “Don’t seem too smart, do ya?” This caused more boys to join in with the chuckling, although most stayed quiet.

You bit your lip, waiting impatiently for them to finish, “Actually,” you started, “I’m going to be your manager for the day, I’ll be in charge of everything you’ll be doing,” you cocked your head to the side, “I’m not lost, and I’m not dumb, you aren’t the first to underestimate me, and you won’t be the last,” you addressed the boy directly, “you aren’t anything special,” you gave a, fake, polite smile. You turned back to the group, “Anymore questions?”

One of the stranglers raised his hand, you pointed to him, and he squinted at you, “I don’t mean any offense, but how old are you? You seem a bit young to be running something this big,” he said, chewing on his lip.

“Well, you aren’t really wrong, I am a bit young, I’m eighteen years old, but just because a few of you may be older than me, don’t think I’m any less in charge,” you confirmed, giving a curt nod to the boy.

Another boy raised his hand, this one caught your eye. He had on a red beanie, brown hair peeking out from under the material. He had the most piercing blue eyes, ones that made you bite the inside of your cheek to control yourself. “Yes?” You asked, holding the clipboard tighter.

“What’s your name?” He asked, a small smile on his face.

You were taken back, no one ever asked your name at these types of events, they usually just called you ‘lady’ or ‘hey you’ but no one ever wanted your name. A gentle smile settled on your lips.

“My name is Y/N, Y/N L/N.”

—

Not long after the boot camp. You found yourself behind the curtain, watching as the judge’s made their decision on who would move forward. You stood next to Dermontt, jittering.

Your eyes were locked on the boy, who you had learned to be Louis. You had bonded, he was one of the only boys genuinely interested in how you got where you were, and so a friendship blossomed.

Each name that wasn’t Louis’ made your heart sink lower and lower, your best tightening when they got down to the final name. You held your breath, clutching on the pillar next to you, you tried to ignore the cackling from the makeup crew behind you.

They called the final name, and it wasn’t Louis. You gaped and he looked over at you, giving you a small smile, a sad one. You frowned, and waved him over, forgetting about the whole televised contest thing. He nodded in the judges’ direction, reminding you that he was being televised. You nodded in understanding, and felt Dermontt’s eyes watching you.

You snapped your head in his direction, he smirked and pointed to the boys, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

You rolled your eyes, despite the small truth behind his suggestion. Yes, you had gotten close with Louis, he was perfect. He was funny, kind, charming, sweet, polite, and not to mention deathly handsome, which also meant you had caught feelings, nothing too strong, but each time you looked at him, you felt yourself flush. So nothing to be concerned about.

The judges finished their heartfelt speech, and the boys made their way off the stage, all of the already crying, although you could tell Louis was trying to hide it.

You opened your arms when he was a few feet away from you. He collapsed into you, burying his head in your neck.

“I tried so hard, Y/N,” he mumbled, his voice cracking.

You stroked his head, trying to soothe him, “I know Lou, I know,” you whispered, your knees almost buckling when you felt a wet patch forming on your shoulder.

But unfortunately, you still had a job to do.

You held onto Louis, turning your head to your cameraman, pointing to the contestants, hinting to get interviews. You didn’t think it was morally right, but your superiors had ordered it, claiming something about getting a sob story. The cameraman nodded, then making his way around the boys, getting reactions out of each of them.

About fifteen minutes later, the boys were told to gather backstage for an announcement, and you were told to bring the cameras.

You walked with Louis, keeping a hand on his back as you walked. You gestured to all the cameras around you, ushering them to follow you.

When you arrived where the other boys were, you let go of Louis, pushing him into the crowd. He gave you a nervous smile, and turned to face the director.

He began calling names, among these were Niall Horan, Harry Styles, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne, and Louis. On that day, One Direction was formed.

You had plenty of fun memories on X-Factor with the boys. You had grown close, they were like your brothers at this point, well, Louis definitely did not feel like a brother.

One of your favorite memories from the X-Factor is when you were put in charge of filing the boys’ video diaries, so those were always entertaining, but you’ll never forget the first one.

The boys were joking around, poking fun at each other. You didn’t have much to do besides start and stop the filming, so you decided to have a little snack, a bag of carrots.

The boys turned to Louis, seeing what his favorite quality was in a girl, something at three him off guard. His eyes had flickered between your bag and your face before answering, “I like girls who… eat carrots.”

This caused the boys to look in your direction, Niall’s laugh echoing through the staircase. You stopped crewing, easily becoming flustered. Instead of doing a rational thing, you decided to playfully flip him off, sending the boys into another fit of giggles.

When they were kicked off the show, you were afraid that was the last you’d see of Louis, but he had invited you to be his personal assistant, well, the band’s personal assistant, and you didn’t hesitate to accept the offer.

You’ve been with the band for over four years now, falling deeper in love with Louis, although you never said anything. You were too scared.

You were scared of losing the best friend you’d ever had, scared of losing your job, scared of losing the love of your life, although the ladder is a bit hypocritical.

One of your favorite songs, scratch that, your favorite song of the band’s was 18. Although Louis hadn’t written it, it explained how you felt perfectly, something you had planned to thank Ed for.

You stood backstage, making sure the boys were ready, only a minute remaining before their platforms raised.

You went to each boy, making final adjustments to their hair and sleeves, making sure they looked perfect for their audience.

Finally, you had arrived at Louis, shaking your head when you saw him smirking. You let out a long sigh, reaching to fix his hair, not completely satisfied with it, “I swear to god if you get wet tonight because of your water fights with Liam, you’re not getting any hugs after the show, I don’t want to get wet,” you chided.

Louis bit his lip, trying not to smile, “I don’t want to get wet, title of your sex tape,” he teased and you groaned.

“Making you watch Brooklyn 99 was a mistake,” you mumbled and he chuckled.

“Too late to go back,” he said, nearly falling over when the platform began to rise. You waved him goodbye, making your way up to the wings of the stage, wanting to watch the show, but also wanting to remain hidden from the audience.

The show went remarkably well, as most of their shows do. You bopped along to some songs, giggling when Harry and Liam began trying on things fans had thrown onstage. Halfway through the show, Liam and Louis began their famous water fights, making you shake your head, although you couldn’t have been happier.

You were thrown off when the choreography for 18 was changed. Louis remained near the back of the stage, where you were within his view. You were about to go find the choreographer, but shrugged it off, they always broke their routines.

You sang along to the song, singing the lyrics under your breath. You waited in excitement for Louis’ solo, quite possibly your favorite moment of the whole show.

When he was to cue in, he turned to you, locking eyes with you, “I have loved you since we were eighteen,” he sang, making your jaw drop, not much, you weren’t sure if he meant it. “Long before we both thought the same thing, to be loved and to be in love,” he sang, still singing directly to you.

You pressed a hand to your chest, still in disbelief about what he had done. Was he messing around? Did he just do that to get a reaction out of you?

A part of you knew he wasn’t, Louis didn’t mess around with that stuff, and that’s what made it ten times harder.

The boys took their intermission, Louis hastily walking over to you and dragging you into his shared dressing room. He locked the door, turning to face you with his lip tucked between his teeth. “So…” he began, looking at you from under his eyelashes.

He was so damn pretty.

“Cut the shit, Louis, did you really mean it?” You inquired, crossing your arms over your chest.

He scrunched his face up, letting out a deep sigh, stepping over to you and grabbing your hands. “I really meant it,” he admitted, and you stared at him quizzically.

You stared at him for a moment, his eyes studying your face. You placed your hand on his cheek, bringing him down to you, placing your lips against his.

He kissed back, wrapping his arms around your waist, pulling you closer to him. You finally felt complete, after all these years, and although Louis had been there for years, your love was all you needed.

You didn’t rush with the kiss, after all, you had all the time in the world.

—

Permanent Taglist (If you want to be added just let me know!): @everything-is-alrightt @kaiaduke @franchesca-791 @alwayshave-faith

[ladynestaarcheron]

Fears All the Way Down - Chapter Four

ao3 - masterpost

hello all. not entirely back from my hiatus, but i decided i did want to share this on tumblr just in case someone isn't on ao3. i've been having a rough month and as it turns out, writing this really helped boost my mood, so maybe reading it can help boost someone else's. so enjoy!

---

Elain is hysterical, but Nesta expected that. Feyre takes her by surprise, though.

"How did they get in?" she keeps saying. "How did they get in?" Almost as though she can't say anything else at all.

"Azriel's taken them in for questioning," Rhysand tells her, rubbing her shoulders. "We'll know everything soon enough."

Nesta's mildly irritated that she's the one who was attacked and yet it's her who has to comfort her sisters, but no matter. They're upset and she...isn't.

"It's really all right. The House kept me safe." The House keeps her safe, actually. Safe and comfortable and healthy and warm and clean....

"You'll come to stay at home tonight," Feyre says, squeezing a shaking Elain's hand tightly.

Home being Feyre and Rhysand's mansion by the Sidra. "I...don't think I will, actually. Thank you."

Her sisters blink at her.

"You don't want to stay here," Elain says, the first thing she's managed since crying.

Nesta bristles slightly at the implied insult to the House. "I do."

"It kept her safe," Cassian says, speaking for the first time since he brought in Elain.

"But they got in!"

"Maybe it let them in so you could catch them," Nesta suggests. "But it's safe for me here. And...I don't want to go." How could she possibly give up her standing bath, her magically-warmed room? There's not a price one can put on a proper night's sleep and then starting the day clean.

Feyre and Elain glance at each other for a moment, then nod at her.

"All right," Elain says, brave face on. "We'll stay with you."

Unnecessary. But if it'll make them feel better. "All right, then."

Rhysand gives Feyre a kiss on her cheek and puts a hand on Elain's shoulder. "We'll leave you ladies to get settled, then." He gives Nesta a charming, reassuring smile--ugh. "Everything's going to be fine."

"You're going to those Illyrians?" she asks.

"Yes," Rhysand says. "You get some sleep. You don't need to worry about any of this."

She's not worried about any of this. Why is no one listening to her?

No matter, she decides again. She was never in any danger anyway. She can just...calm her sisters, and go to bed, and put this from her mind.

Except she can't. The House's damaged wall stays etched in her mind, and the sound of those Hyben soldiers chasing after her in the library in her ears. What if they get in? Illyrians, or Briallyn, into the library? During a session with Thalia or one of Calliope's lectures or jewelry making or weekly check-in?

As she gets more agitated, tossing and turning, the room warms slightly. The House lulling her to sleep.

Fine. Fine, she can sleep tonight. Thalia says that she shouldn't agitate in bed, anyway. It's counterproductive and illogical--she'll sleep now, then be well-rested in the morning, and then she can come up with...something. To ensure the library remains safe while she is here.

Because if she doesn't...she might have to leave.

And she realizes she's not prepared to do that.

Something a soldier learns quickly is that torture during interrogation needs to be handled with precision and care, because people will generally say absolutely anything to get the pain to stop, and then none of the information can really be trusted. On top of that is the act itself, which damages the perpetrator as much as the victim. Cassian knows all this, and yet, as he thinks of Nesta, he can't bring himself to care.

"Calm down." Azriel's icy voice cuts through the images of her in duress hitting him like a series of punches.

He only snarls in return, but Az isn't shaken.

"She's all right," he says. "Calm down."

"She could have died." There it is, the simple truth. She could have died . They could have killed her . Briallyn wants her revenge; she'll probably do it slowly and painfully.

"She was safe the whole time, Cass."

"She didn't even know anything was going on," Rhys says, agreeing. "She's not even scared."

So what? So she wasn't scared this time, so what? The other times she was scared. Next time she might be.

"I should have been there." He should have never let Feyre and Elain go through with this. Fought to keep her in Rhys' home in the city; surely even these Illyrians would not dare attack the High Lord's residence.

"That's enough," Rhys says sharply. "It's not your fault. She's safe. And you were there. Right as the alarms went off."

"You were there faster."

"What does that matter?"

"It's a good thing she was at the House, Cass," Az says.

Yes, good thing. Good thing the House can keep her safe, even if he can't. From his own people.

"What did they say?" he asks, voice a growl. Rhys had not let him in the rooms if he could not promise to control himself. He could not.

"Not much," Rhys admits. "Just confirmed what we knew."

"It'll take time," Az says, spinning Truth-Teller in his fingers. "But I would like to state for the record there is a way to speed up the process."

"We can't make them martyrs," Rhys says. "We can't just senselessly slaughter them."

"It's not senseless. They're collaborating with an enemy to overthrow the crown. They attacked a Lady of the Court. There should be punishment for that." Az's eyes are cold in a way Cassian's never could be when talking about his own. Yes, he wants them to die for what they'd do to Nesta. But the way his brother feels about their people as a whole will always hurt in its own way.

"So they're scattered throughout the camps?" Cassian says, steering them back towards the matter at hand.

"With their strongest presence in Windhaven, yes."

Cassian frowns. Even though intelligence had led them to suspect it, having it confirmed...Windhaven is a more moderate camp, with Devlon, it's leader, being mild enough that he had let him and Az participate in the Rite centuries ago. But perhaps Windhaven's structure had led to its rebels being organized enough to form a strong base.

"We should start by cutting them off at Windhaven," he starts slowly, "and then we might not even have to bother with the dissenters in the other camps. Should we start interrogating the males there?"

Az raises an eyebrow. "You want to interrogate every male in Windhaven?"

"I think it'd be easier to just kill anyone who won't swear fealty to Rhys and Feyre, but since you two want to go about this diplomatically--"

"That's not the diplomatic approach," Rhys cuts in. "And that's not what we're doing. That's a colossal waste of time."

"Keeping Nesta safe is not a wa-- "

"I didn't mean that," Rhys interrupts again. "But there are far more productive methods of ensuring her safety and also furthering our cause of diminishing theirs."

"And I'm not going to like it," Cassian says, scowling.

"No," Rhys admits. "I don't think you will."

Nesta had been looking forward to going back to the library, because Elain had looked at her all weekend as though she was already mourning her and Feyre had driven her spare with her constant reassurances that all would be well and safe. But being here now, with the girls who were so close to having their sanctuary breached--yet again, because of her--brings forth a new layer of guilt.

"You're quiet," Gwyn whispers to her in weekly check-in.

"I'm always quiet."

"Bad quiet. What's wrong?"

"Just tired," she says, softly.

It's something of a lie, actually. Despite her concern over the safety of the library and the House--and herself, she supposes--Nesta actually awoke today feeling refreshed. She sleeps well and can stomach a few small meals a day. She's even begun inserting small jogging segments during her walks outside, just to get her blood pumping. Sometimes she catches herself aching for a drink, but her head no longer throbs in pain and Thalia's exercises help her to rid her mind of the thought.

It's working with her hands Nesta likes best. The lectures are fascinating, but she still ends up drifting down some spiral, but the jewellery-making and book-sorting keep her focused enough that she can't think about how miserable she is.

And the thing is, here, now, she's not miserable. She's not happy, not by any stretch of the imagination, but she's not miserable. And that's...worth something.

She wonders if any research she might get assigned to will also help in distracting her...or if that might make her happy.

No, she thinks, looking around at the dozens of girls, plenty of whom don't even speak after decades or centuries of being here. Research does not make people happy. Perhaps there are some people who just aren't meant to be. After all, she does not think she has ever been so. Not in her wealthy childhood, not in her poverty-stricken adolescence, and certainly not here.

Not miserable is good enough. She can be not miserable for her sisters, be presentable and not so embarrassing for their sakes.

Elain and Feyre are still there when she leaves the library for the day, joined by Rhysand and a particularly stoic Cassian. In fact, she thinks as she studies him in the reflection of the mirror in the living room out of the corner of her eye, she cannot recall ever seeing him this...upset. He's glaring at the floor, bright hazel eyes dark and yielding nothing of his typical irritating, incessant character. He spins a dagger between his fingers, siphons glowing bright each time he nearly slices his fingers clean off.

"Did it...go well with the Illyrians?" she asks, trying to keep her focus on something else.

"If you're an optimist," Rhys answers, grinning.

Ugh.

Feyre catches her annoyance at his answer and throws him a sharp look. "We've confirmed that Briallyn is taking advantage of the rebel situation in Illyria to get to you."

"Is that different from what you already thought?"

"It's good to have it confirmed," Feyre says. "We know more about the rebels in our context--" she gestures to herself and to Rhys, "--than in hers. So we know the best way to combat it."

Nesta waits a few moments, but no one says anything. "Which is?" she prompts.

Elain's throat bobs. Nesta watches Cassian's jaw clench even tighter in the mirror.

"The Illyrians need to be reminded of their place," Rhys says. "They forget, because of the distance between us, that they answer to us."

Nesta doesn't particularly care about the inter-politics of the Night Court, but she suspects that if an organized Illyrian rebellion is now working with Briallyn to kill her in order to unseat Rhysand or separate themselves from him, there's probably more than just distance involved.

"So you're going to remind them?" Nesta asks.

"That's where we thought you might have something to do with it."

Cassian starts tossing the knife between his hands faster, almost stabbing at the air. Nesta ignores how her heart speeds up when he nearly drops it through his foot.

"If the Illyrians end up going to civil war, we'll win. But we prefer to tamper down the rebels. We think the best way to do that is show them, first and foremost, this isn't worth dying over. And they will die." Rhys' words are a cold promise.

It's--frightening. What does he want her to do?

"Come with us to Windhaven," he says, as though in answer.

Nesta blinks. "I...thought I was here to stay safe."

"You'll be safe the whole time," Rhys says firmly.

"We would never entertain this otherwise," Feyre adds, eyes wide.

"What would going to Windhaven do? A display of strength?" Seems like it'd be right up the Inner Circle's alley, but overall, in her opinion, useless.

"Precisely," Rhys says, satisfied she's understood. She stifles an eyeroll. "You don't have to do much. Just walk around. We'll give you a tour of the camp. You remember how terrified they were of you, don't you?"

She does. Witch, they had called her. "But they won't be," she says. "They must know I don't have any magic." There's simply nothing to be scared of. She is, perhaps, not quite as sickly and pathetic today as she was a month ago, but certainly nothing to look twice at. Nothing to fear. Nothing to note.

Feyre opens her mouth to object, but Cassian beats her to it.

"You're a female twice as powerful as any of them. They'll fear you." She has no choice but to look at him when he speaks, and he catches her gaze tightly, fiercely, and she can't look away, can't turn her head or even blink--

"We'll be with you the whole time," Feyre says, breaking the spell. She forces herself to look at the floor instead.

"I'll come too," Elain says, determined.

"You don't need to," Nesta says, voice softened. "It's fine. I can do it. I'm not scared."

Elain deflates a bit, in relief or in disappointment, she isn't sure.

"I'm sure you're tired. We'll go tomorrow, if that's all right with you," Feyre says.

Nesta of a month ago had no plans for the day or her life, but now... "Actually, could we go to Tuesday?"

The four of them look at her in surprise.

"There's a new lecture circuit starting." History of limb and organ transplants, led by Daphne, their healer. "I wanted to go."

"Oh," Feyre says, blinking. "Oh! Well! That's--yes, of course, we'll go Tuesday instead. Yes, that's...that's fine."

Her sister's attempt at being casual. Nesta stifles another eyeroll.

"Well, I think I'd like to wash the dust off before bed..." Lie. She wants to go for a walk and eat a small dinner and read. But she wants them gone. She's had quiet enough company for the day.

"Of course! We'll leave you to it, then." Feyre leaves with a smile, and Elain gives her a soft kiss on her cheek before leaving with the pair of them. Cassian follows, but he lingers in the doorway.

"You don't have to go, you know," he says, turning and taking a few steps towards her. Too many.

"I know," she says. "I meant what I said. I'm not scared." The House won't be there to protect her, but... "Aren't you coming?"

"I am," he says, voice low--lower than normal, that is.

She nods once, eyes trained on the floor. She can't look at him again. Not when there's no alcohol to muddy the intensity of his gaze, no promise of some other male to drive him from her thoughts tonight.

I have no regrets in my life, but this.

I have never in my life thought you were pathetic.

"Good night," she says abruptly, turning around and rushing down the stairs.

No, no other male. A book or a game with the House will have to do.

They travel to Illyria the same way they came up to the House, but in reverse. Cassian flies her up until they are out of the House's protective sphere, then Rhys and Feyre grab on to each of them and winnow them to solid ground, miles and miles away.

She had been here once, during the war. It was miserable. It hasn't changed much. The lack of the stench of death is a significant step up, though.

"We'll be meeting Devlon. Camp lord."

Feyre links their arms together and Nesta bites her tongue to keep from saying anything. She doesn't think she and Feyre have ever walked arm-in-arm like this before. She and Elain had plenty, once. She and her other human friends, back when she had them. Way, way back.

They reach a sort of training center soon enough, and the Illyrians do double-takes when they see them-- her . She sees familiar religious gestures and even recognizes some of the males.

"Morning, Devlon," Rhysand drawls to the one approaching them.

"What is this?" he growls.

"Lady Nesta heard some soldiers were interested in her wellbeing. She was curious too."

Devlon narrows his eyes and scowls, but some of the younger males behind him grow faint.

And she supposes...considering how all this might look to them...she understands.

For Rhysand is their all-powerful High Lord, magic rippling from his being. Cassian is their most feared warrior, and he flanks them from behind, seven siphons radiating enough heat that she can feel it through her cloak. And she stands with Feyre, their High Lady, their cursebreaker, in a fine gown indeed that the House had picked out for her (one the nicest she's worn in quite some time)...yes, perhaps this does look a sight to behold. Perhaps they do seem powerful, not worth the effort.

Still, she knows that she herself is nothing to fear. Any one of these soldiers are as strong as the ones from Hybern who pulled her out of bed, and she has not exactly improved in physical prowess since then.

"My sister would like a tour, please," Feyre says sweetly.

Nesta almost blanches at her tone. She doesn't think she's ever heard it before.

Devlon probably isn't allowed to glare at Rhysand or Feyre or maybe her either, so he settles on Cassian. She can hear him chuckle slightly, but she doesn't turn to see.

"This way, Lady," Devlon says finally.

Devlon's tour-guide skills leave a bit to be desired, but in his defense, there isn't much here.

"Don't you have a school?" she asks, interrupting his riveting description of the shops and the living quarters .

Devlon freezes in his tracks. "You will not touch our children, witch," he snarls.

Nesta rolls her eyes and makes to answer, but Cassian moves before she can.

"Don't threaten her again," he hisses, knives at the ready in his hands.

Feyre and Rhys don't act as though this disturbs them in the least. On the contrary.

"Answer Lady Nesta, Devlon," Rhys says, almost lazily.

After another glaring-match with Cassian, he does, pointing to a dilapidated building. "There," he grunts.

"Not in session, I see," she says.

He grunts again, and walks them a little more along the main road, not bothering to point out any more attractions.

"Well," Nesta says, when they reach the training center again. "Thank you for that...riveting experience." In truth, while she doesn't like Devlon much, all this day has done has shed some light on why the Illyrians hate living under Rhysand so much. Velaris' luxury seems ostentatious in comparison, even vulgar. She doesn't think she ought to bear the brunt of it, obviously. But there seems to be an easy path to calming the rebels.

"I didn't see any girls this morning, Devlon," Cassian says, stepping in front of her and Feyre to talk.

Feyre pulls her closer. "All right," she whispers. "Now, we're going to go back to the training center, and you can walk around the shops. Don't be scared," she hurries to say. "You'll be perfectly safe. I promise."

"I'm not scared," Nesta replies.

"Good."

After a few more minutes of discussion--with Cassian angry at Devlon for a lack of female soldiers, Nesta gathers--the four of them trail off, Feyre squeezing her hand in goodbye.

A few Illyrians loiter around her, pretending not to stare at her as she turns around and heads back towards the shops.

There aren't many here--a butcher's, a liquor store (Nesta had clenched her jaw the whole way past the first time, and she does again now), some clothier's. One of them, Nesta notes, is stocked with winter goods, while the others seem to be selling out quite nicely.

She makes her way inside. If only to escape the gaping from the Illyrians who can't seem to decide if they want to follow her or run away.

The shop is warm, quiet, and empty but for a female at the front, with her back to the door.

"Good--morning," she says, the pause in her words when she turns to see her customer and sees that it is Nesta. "Lady," she adds.

"Good morning," Nesta says.

"Can I help you with anything?" the female says bravely.

"Just browsing."

They both know it's a lie. The shop is far too small to pretend to browse. But she lets her.

The female looks younger than Nesta, but she might be older. The fae take longer to age, with Cassian's five hundred-odd years giving him a face that Nesta would guess is thirty-two, and Nesta's own body, frozen at twenty-three, probably looks to fae to be two hundred or so. She wears a simple dress--everything in the shop is simple, and makes Nesta feel uncomfortable in her finery. Like Velaris' vulgar beauty that she had thought of earlier. Nesta's clearly not here to browse.

"I had heard you were interested in a tour," the female says politely. "Was it to your liking?"

"Yes," Nesta says. "News...travels fast around here, does it?"

"Not much to talk about." The female turns to put away a folded sweater, and Nesta sees a horrible set of scars down her wings. She can't stop her mouth from falling open, and manages to say something with slightly more decorum than her original intended gasp.

"I'm Nesta."

The females turns. "I know. I'm Emerie. I own this shop."

Nesta cocks her head. "You do?"

"I do."

"That's very impressive," she said. "I used to own a business." Her own trading on the continent. She hadn't trusted her father with all of their finances again, and had insisted on running some of her own.

"Really?" Emerie says, clearly mirroring Nesta's sentiments. Which is--nice. That camaraderie. And outside of the library, too. "Well, it's nice to know there are other females interested in making a name for themselves."

Nesta huffs a noise of amusement. "It is." She's silent for a beat, then asks, "Is it...difficult? Here? For you, as..."

"As a female who's not cowed by this?" she says, gesturing outside. "It's...not as lonely as you might think. And that makes it less difficult."

Nesta nods. She understands what Emerie means, even if she doesn't quite feel it herself. Friendship, she means. Sisterhood.

All the same, it's nice to know. That it's out there, outside of the library, and in it. Even if she doesn't have it. Even if she...

"Did it work, then?" she asks Feyre, hours later.

"It did," she says, a smug smile on her lips. "You did great. Good job, Nesta."

Nesta nods, even though it doesn't feel as though she's done much.

"I'll see you, then," Feyre says, reaching Nesta's hand to squeeze it in goodbye. "Elain will be so pleased to hear," she says, partly to herself, Nesta thinks. She practically skips towards Rhysand, who sweeps her in his arms as they descend into the city.

"Wait," Nesta calls to Cassian, before she realizes what she's doing.

He freezes in his tracks, wings still poised to follow after her sister and Rhysand. He turns.

"I wanted to ask you," she said, suddenly very aware of her heartbeat. "If you'd--once you asked--I--"

Her face flushes crimson, but he doesn't mock or even grin. Only nods once, patient, and that spurs her.

"If you could perhaps teach me some self defense? Not--not training, not like those soldiers...but maybe, if they attack again, and they get to me, just so that I know--just so I'm not entirely--"

"Yes," he cuts in. "I will."

"All right," she says, nodding slightly. "Thank you," she adds, realizing she probably should.

He swallows. Starts to say something. Then, nearly flinging himself off the veranda, he flies away.

[deanandthephantoms]

We're a Perfect Harmony PT.3 - Reader x Charlie

This is Chapter 3 of my Perfect Harmony story. You can read Chapter 1 here and Chapter 2 here if you haven't yet. In this chapter we'll see what life after camp is like for y/n and Charlie.. Enjoy!

Missing you more than i should..

When I got home I was overwhelmed by the amount of silence in my home. I used to love being home, curling up on the couch watching a movie or reading a book in silence. I hated loud, crowded places and now I actually missed it? What happened to me? Who am I?! I thought to myself..

“Y/N is that you?” I heard my mom call out from the living room. “Hi mom!” i said while walking up to her and giving her a big hug. “How are you doing honey? How was it?” I hadn’t really spoken to my mom at all during the week, I had let her know once that I was doing alright and that was basically it. “It was incredible mom. I had the best group of people surrounding me..” and so I told her everything about my new group of friends and everything we had done during the week.. “Thanks for making me go mom.” “You’re glowing Y/N! I’m so happy you had such a good time. I honestly felt bad for making you go when I saw how nervous you were.” “yeah.. I kind of hated you for that.. but I guess sometimes mom really does know best.” After talking to my mom I decided to lay down for a bit all those late night chill sessions with Charlie and a night of not sleeping at all was really taking it’s toll, I don’t think I had ever been this tired before. I fell asleep with a smile on my face only to wake up the next freaking day at 10am. I slept for 15 hours I really had been tired.. I picked up my phone to see I was indeed added to the girls group chat, I was also in a chat with our entire camp group and Charlie had , like he promised, sent me a private text. Seeing that put a smile on my face. Now I know what you’re thinking.. but I really just liked him as a friend that’s all. I opened his message.

“Good morning Nugget! On a scale of 1 to 100% dead.. how tired are you?” I raised my eyebrow at the nugget part, no idea where that was coming from. Without hesitation I replied.. “ Hellllooooo! Nugget? What’s up with that? Very bold of you to assume that I was even tired to begin with by the way.. but to answer your question, I have slept for 15 hours.. that says something doesn’t it?” I was about to put my phone down assuming Charlie would take his sweet time to reply. But no. the 3 dots that told me he was typing appeared almost instantly and  seconds later this popped up on my screen; “15 HOURS?! Really? Are you sure you weren’t dead and came back to life or something? I thought I was bad with my 12 hours.. I’m blaming you for the fact I’m so tired by the way.” He’s blaming me?! Excuse me? “Pardon? What? What did I do?!” “You kept me up till at least 3am every night only to be woken up again at 7am.. i’ve never been so tired coming home after camp. So yes I’m blaming you Nugget.” “The nugget again? Really? Anyway. I’m not sorry. You kept ME up actually. I’m blaming you Charlie.” “Yes Nugget. You mentioned once you like nuggets. I’m calling you nugget now. You can’t stop me. Oh and I’m not sorry either 😉” “Riiight. Don’t expect me to start calling you after one of your gross foods.. but all jokes aside, i’m glad you’re not sorry. I mean, all those late nights might be one of my favorite things of last week.”  “Really? I genuinely thought I annoyed the shit out of you.” That text made me laugh. “Don’t get your hopes up Gillespie. You sure did. Apparently you’re just the type of guy who gets away with it.” I teased. “Ouch.. that hurt. :( “ is all I got as a reply. Which caused my brain to go in full panic mode, did I just really hurt my new friend? Oh god what if this ruined it all? As fast I could I sent him “I’m sorry! I’m just kidding! You know that right?! You didn’t annoy me at all dude, in fact you did the opposite you made me feel super chill and comfortable..” I stared at my screen for what felt like hours, in reality it was probably more like 5 minutes but I got no reply..

I sighed deciding to ignore my own stupid actions I got up from my bed and went downstairs making myself some breakfast. Sitting down at the table I actually found myself missing the man that had sat opposite of me the entire week. I was missing the man that made me feel sick with his strange food combinations. Missing the man that called me out for looking dead after 3 hours of sleep. Missing the man that annoyed me with how loud he was so early in the morning. Don’t get me wrong I missed the others as well they had all, in their own way, made that week a very good week for me. I had just connected with Charlie in a different way, he seemed to really get me, he understood where I was coming from. He had not once judged me, he made me come out of my comfort zone.. My phone buzzed on the table, my hand flew straight to it and picked it up only to see Charlie had replied. I felt my heart speed up and started feeling very nervous. Why was this happening? why was i scared for his reply? We had been teasing each other right from the start. This could not have been so bad that I ruined everything, right?!

With a deep sigh I opened our chat back up. “Y/N calm down. I know. I was just kidding too! Good to know I made you feel that way though. You do realize you did the same for me right? You made me feel better when I was feeling down. I really appreciate that.” I couldn’t help but let out a big sigh of relief. Thank god everything was alright. Why did I care so much? I had known this man for 8 days. Why was I already so afraid of ruining this friendship? “Charlie, I swear to god, you can never do that to me again! I thought I ruined it all..” I typed, but deleted. I didn’t want him to know a simple joke made me go into full panic mode, he’ll think I’m crazy.. so instead I went with “ha-ha, very funny Gillespie. And hey, cheering each other up, that’s what friends are for right? 😊” “Yeah definitely. You didn’t have to do that though, you barely knew me. Yet seemed to know me better than the people I’ve known for years. You noticed things others didn’t notice or they just decided to ignore it. You didn’t. You’re a good friend Nugget. I’m thankful for getting a chance to meet and know you.”

Reading that made me feel al warm and fuzzy inside I just sat there at the kitchen table with a dumb goofy smile on my face. That’s when my mom walked in. “What are you smiling about?” “ohhh nah it’s nothing.” I simply replied, hoping my mom would buy it. Too bad for me my mom knew me longer than today. “It’s a boy, isn’t it?” “Mom! I.. eeh.. no?.. I mean.. well technically.. Yes. But no. Charlie is just a friend mom.” And I truly believed I felt that way, my mom clearly didn’t though ..”oh alright, well we’ll see.” She replied. Before leaving me once again to get back to her office. I directed my attention back to the screen “You’re a good friend too Charlie. I’m thankful my mom made me go to camp. Thankful I now can call a few amazing people my new friends. I really miss you guys. Is that weird?” “Thank your mom from me for making you go! 😉 And no, that’s not weird. We all feel that way after camp. Don’t worry the feeling will vanish over time and we’ll keep in touch through texts and facetime!” “Facetime huh? Why don’t we facetime later, you can thank my mom yourself haha!” i texted half jokingly but Charlie seemed to think it was a good idea. We kept sending text to each other the rest of day and I noticed I was looking forward to seeing his face again. I missed his bright smile, his facial expressions that said everything for me. His eyes that showed he was fully invested in whatever you’re telling him. I missed his hugs. They really were the best hugs I had ever had. I sighed at the thought of having to miss those for a whole year.. Can’t exactly hug through facetime, can you?

Later that night Charlie called me on facetime, accepting his call I saw his bright smile pop up on my screen. “Nuggeeettt!” he screamed at me sounding all excited. I couldn’t help but instantly feel happy and laugh at him. I refused to get used to that nickname but also decided not to fight him on it tonight. “Gillespieeeeeeee!” I just screamed back at him earning a big smile in return. “Soo, first things first, get me to your mom, I need to thank her.” “Your wish is my command sir!” I reply as I get up from my bed to find my mom. I find her in the livingroom on the couch. “Hey mom, Charlie wants to tell you something” I say while handing her the phone. “Hello Mrs.Y/L/N!” “Ah, so you’re Charlie! I’ve already heard quite a bit about you.” If looks could kill I would have killed my own mom right then and there.. “Yes.. that would be me. I just wanted to thank you for sending your daughter to camp. She has been a good friend to all of us.” My mom laughed “You’re welcome dear. Thank you for doing the same to her” My mom then handed me my phone back. Giving her one last glare I make my way back to my bedroom. “Sorry about that..” I say to Charlie while walking upstairs. “Sorry for what? Your mom seems lovely. No need to be sorry.” Thankful for the fact he apparently did not pick up on the whole ‘heard quite a bit about you.’ I let out big breath I apparently had been holding in.

I sat back down on my bed and luckily for me Charlie had grabbed his guitar “so. How about we continue our little tradition of singing? Name a song and we’ll sing it.” He said with the biggest smile. I was just glad I did not have to explain why I apologized and quickly started thinkin of a song. “Do you know High hopes by Kodaline? It’s not the happiest song, but it’s sooo good!” “I’m kind of offended by the fact you’re even asking me if I know it.. It’s actually one of the first songs I learned to play on this guitar.” And before I could apologize for offending him I heard the first chords of High hopes being played. As if we were still on camp we sang a few songs, granted it didn’t go as smooth thanks to delay in the video and such but still it was nice. After a few songs I heard my mom come up and calling out a good night. “Char.. I think I’m gonna have to go. My mom is going to bed so you know I gotta be quiet now…” “Nooo! don’t hang up just yet. We can still just talk for a bit right?” I was caught of guard by his plea for me to stay. “I, eh. Yeah. Yeah we can. Of course we can. Give me a second though. I’m gonna change into my PJ’s.” and with that I threw my phone on the bed, grabbing my oversized Rush t-shirt that basically functioned as a sleeping dress. “Nice ceiling you’ve got there nugget.” I heard Charlie call out. Giving him a chuckle as response. Once I changed into my PJ’s I picked my phone up and brought Charlie with me to the bathroom. “Loving the house tour Y/N, where are we going now?” “To the bathroom. I need to brush my teeth.” “oh right let me go do the same!” and he sprinted of with me to his own bathroom. About a minute later we were brushing our teeth together. causing us both to giggle at each others charming facial expressions.

After I was done I went back to my bedroom and crawled into bed making myself comfortable. “sooo I assume you don’t want to be here when I go pee right?” “Eeew Charles! No. Either hang up the phone or put me somewhere far away!” He laughed at me “Yeah thought so.  I’m not hanging up so let me just put you down on my bed.” “ Oof.. That also sounds a bit strange sir.. But sure. You do that.” “kinda does, doesn’t it?” he laughed “Okay, I’ll be back, don’t go anywhere.” And with that I was staring at Charlie’s ceiling waiting for him to come back.. which he did incredibly quickly.

Crawling into his own bed he picked me up only to instantly put me back down again."You actually waited for me!" He said while I could see him taking off his shirt nothing I had not seen before but still a sight I sure was not mad about. “of course i waited, why would i leave without saying goodbye?” i reply before Charlie fell back down on the bed and picked me back up, trying to get comfortable he was tossing and turning a bit. “You alright there, Charlie?” I said half teasingly. “Yeah, quite comfortable actually. You? I really like your shirt by the way.” Why did I feel myself starting to blush? Acting as if nothing was happening to me I replied in my chillest and coolest way; “Yeah I’m alright. Very comfortable as well actually. Nothing beats sleeping in your own bed right?” “I don’t know about that nugget, I could think of a thing or two I totally would pick over sleeping in my own bed.” “Really like what?” When I see a mischievous smile appear on his face i’m suddenly scared of the answer I’m about to get. “Oh you know..” He falls silent with that same damn smile on his face. When I raise an eyebrow at him he continues; . “You know, Sleeping in a tent at festivals, or just camping with some friends in a beautiful piece of nature or something.” i let out a sigh of relief “oh righttt. Yeah i’m fully on board with all of that.”

Charlie and I talked for another hour while we we’re both laying in our beds. At some point I felt my eyes getting heavier and heavier, and I kept fighting it as hard as I could. I was enjoying this conversation way too much for me to go to sleep now. I totally believed I was hiding it from Charlie as well. I clearly didn’t though..“Hey Y/N?” “Mhhmm?” “You’re about to fall asleep aren’t you?” I’m silent for a while now really almost falling asleep. “Goodnight nugget.” I suddenly hear Charlie say softly. That wakes me back up a bit. “NO!” I clear my throat before continuing “I mean.. no I’m not tired..” “Oh really you’re not tired huh?” Charlie starts to imitate the way I had been acting and reacting the last 20 minutes. “okay okay Fine. Stop it Gillespie. You win, Nighty night Charles.” “night night Y/N. Talk to you again tomo.. well in a few hours,” He gives me one last sweet smile before I close my eyes and I hear Charlie hang up the phone right as I’m about to fall asleep. 

Charlie and I kept in contact like that every single day. We didn’t start our day without wishing each other a good morning and refused to go to bed without wishing each other a goodnight and giving each other a virtual hug. During our schooldays we took every free second to text and we made sure to hype each other up when something important had to be done. Late nights were still being made but the few hours of sleep never seemed to bother me. I was basically running on 4 to 5 hours of sleep each day and was doing just fine. i didn’t even come close to feeling tired and was ready to do it all over again the next day. Months passed spending my time just like that..

I had been in contact with all of them on the regular and today i was actually meeting up with Madison who lived somewhat close to me. I was so excited to see her again. We had agreed to meet at a train station and that’s where I was now waiting for her to arrive. Y/N! I hear Madison yell out. I look in the direction the voice was coming from, I see Madison and run up to her to embrace her in a hug. "Madiiiiii! I missed you! How youu doing?" I let go of her and she laughs at me. "How you doin? Charlie, is that you? " Leaving no room for me to defend myself she continues "kidding, I'm great! How are youu giiirl?" while catching up on how life has been we walk to the restaurant where we had made lunch reservations.

“Sooo” Madison said once we were sat at our table. “ Soo.. what?” i asked the girl who was grinning at me. “ Sooo what’s up with you and Charlie?” i give her a confused look.”What do you mean? We’re friends, Mads. You already knew that though..” Madi laughs at me. “ Really Y/N? That’s all you’re giving me? I know you and Charlie have been talking pretty much non-stop..” I can feel the blood flowing to my cheeks when I say “Well yeah, yeah we have. And yes I have enjoyed every minute of that. But that doesn’t mean anything is going on between us. We just get along very well. Besides, he’s still with Emma so I’m sorry to disappoint you but we’re just friends..” Madi just looks at me for a while before a smile spreads on her face.” What?” I ask her. “ You like him.” She simply states with the biggest smile.” What?! Mads I just told you..” I blurt out a little too loud and a little too fast to actually be somewhat convincing.. causing Madison to laugh at me again. “ Girl you soooo do! “

By now I feel like I'm looking like a tomato, bright red, and i don’t even know why. I truly believed I liked Charlie as a friend, nothing more nothing less. Sure he was the sweetest man i had ever met and sure he believed in me like no one had ever done. and yes we had this incredible connection and were on the same wavelength on so many topics. Yes he got me, yes I felt safe enough to fully be myself and fully be honest with him about everything. aaaand yes he was goood looking. But i didn’t like him like that. I Couldn’t. He was with Emma. Me and him were just friends. I would not let myself get a crush on this guy. It would ruin everything. “ Look Mads. I’m not gonna lie. I do miss hanging out with him in real life and Charlie does make me very happy. But i don’t like him like that. He’s just a good friend to me.” Madison clearly was not convinced.”Sure, keep telling yourself that Y/N.”

And I did. In the following weeks I kept telling myself I didn't like him. I just missed him that was all. The more I talked to Charlie and the more the girls teased me about liking him the less I started to believe my own excuses. Untill the day i couldn’t deny it any longer. I totally liked Charlie more than a friend..

- read chapter 4 here

[the-curious-butterfly]

How about a Lumity fanfic where 16-year old Luz has her memory erased and she's sent back to the human world, Amity visits her a lot and Luz feels like she knows her as more than a friend, but Amity doesn't know how, nor does she have the heart to tell her that they were dating before her memory was erased? Luz knows she's hiding something and digs deeper?

To say something felt off would be an understatement yet Luz had no idea why. By all accounts she had no reason to feel that way because everything was as it should be. Just her and her mom in their cozy little house and she was about to start her second year of High School. This is what normal life was for a teenager and yet why did it feel so wrong. 

And why would that feeling get worse whenever that girl would come to visit. That girl said she was a friend from the summer camp she went to when she was 14 but Luz had to admit that she didn’t remember her at all. Nor does she really remember much, or anything, from summer camp which was weird when you think about it. But the point is the girl, Amity she said her name was, was the most amazing and beautiful girl she’s ever met and considering Luz’s track record for making friends she doubted she could ever forget making a friend like her so she was certain there was something the girl wasn’t telling her. 

According to Amity her family just moved into the neighborhood but Luz has yet to even see her house or pinpoint in which direction she lives. And whenever asked about it, or if Luz were to offer to walk her home, the girl would just turn red and insist it was fine before changing the subject really fast. 

Luz also has never seen her ears, which true is a strange thing to think about and she’s probably being a weirdo right now, but the fact still stands that Amity was always wearing something, like a beanie, to cover them even if it was too hot to do so. And Luz was almost certain it wasn’t for the aesthetic cause the things she wore didn’t always match the rest of her clothes. 

Then there was the issue of her fang, Luz caught it when they were talking one day, and she doesn’t mean it in the way that one tooth seemed just a bit sharper than the others. It was a legit fang that had Luz leaning in all kinds of “too close” for the result was a completely red-faced, stammering Amity and if Luz wasn’t so focused on the fang she probably would have been more concerned cause Amity seemed one second off from hyperventilating. 

But even so Luz was conscious enough to see the signs of something that hinted at “more than friends.” Back when she “first” saw Amity, despite not knowing who she was at all, her heart pounded so heavily, almost painfully, in her chest. Not the kind of pounding you get when you see someone cute for the first time and wouldn’t mind holding hands with them but the kind of pounding that only comes with time. Time that Luz does not remember but god does she want to. So during today’s visit from Amity, Luz decided to tear the bandage clean off and ask the question she’s been dying to know the answer to for awhile. 

“Were we more than friends?” 

Safe to say the question took Amity completely by surprise that she had to spit out the tea she was drinking...directly onto Luz’s shirt. 

“Oh no! Luz, I’m so sorry!” she rushed to grab a napkin from one of the kitchen counters and hurried back to Luz who giggled as the girl did her best to clean the stain off. It was cute even if it was a hopeless endeavor which only added to the poor girl’s embarrassment to the point where she couldn’t stop herself from growling through her teeth.   

Luz was certain she’s never heard someone growl that way before nor that she imagined what Amity would say next. “If I could just use magic here I could have fixed this in no time.” Then she stopped right in her track, napkin clutched hand still pressed against Luz’s shirt but unmoving as Amity stared at her with wide eyes. Like a deer caught in the headlights. Luz could have brushed it off, could have chalked it up to Amity being an imaginative weirdo like her. But Amity didn’t seem like the type and it was obviously something Luz really wasn’t suppose to hear. But more than that was the fact that with those words suddenly something started to feel...right?

“What was that about magic?” 

Amity finally shook herself out of her stupor as she turned away from Luz. “Nothing! Just me being a dork. You know how much I love The Good Witch Azura too. Don’t read too much into it!” She spoke rather quickly as if begging Luz to believe her and for a moment Luz almost did. After all magic doesn’t exist...does it?

The quickest, tiniest flash of a memory played before her eyes and suddenly Luz was on her feet pulling the beanie off from the top of Amity’s head only to expose...very cute and very pointed ears. 

With her back turned Amity had no time to react when suddenly cold air brushed against the tips of her ears and she had to fight back a scream as she brought her hands up to hide them before turning to face Luz. 

“Luz?!” 

“You have pointed ears.” 

“That’s not the point, you can’t just do something like that!” 

“You have fangs.” The girl was angry but it was clear that Luz wasn’t listening. 

“YES I HAVE POINTED EARS AND FANGS OKAY!”

“We didn’t meet at summer camp.” 

“....no we didn’t” 

“You don’t live around here.” 

“No, I don’t.” Amity sighed in defeat. There was no use keeping up the charade now so she lowered her hands from her ears. “And we were...are more than friends.” 

That confession nearly had Luz jumping for joy until she remembered one crucial detail. 

“Then why were you hiding it from me?” 

Amity brought her hands up to hold herself steady as she tried to look anywhere but at Luz. “Because the reason you are here without your memory...it’s because of me.” Luz’s eyes widened but she said nothing. “But there’s no point hiding things now so...I’ll tell you everything, if you still want to hear it?” 

[randomly-a-fan]

Malon's First Time At The Hospital Pt. 3

Pt. 1

Pt. 2

At the hospital in Haddonfield, Malon was having her light breakfast before she has her temperature and blood pressure checked. Jason was looking out the window far out from the horizon, thinking about his home; he senses that something is wrong. He wanted to go out there and check, but he has no way to get there, and he didn’t want to leave Malon behind while she’s still recovering.

Malon’s coughs were getting less painful, so the medicine that the doctors gave her are working great. Just then, MJ came in with a ‘Get Well Soon’ balloon. “Hi, sweetie... How are you feeling?” MJ asked in a gentle tone while approaching her. “Hi mom... I’m starting to get less coughs, and my chest is starting to hurt less,” Malon answered. “But I still have to stay in the hospital for another night.” Malon said sadly. “I know you missed being home, but you’ll be going home soon; the doctor told me that you’re making a speedy recovery, and that we might go home tomorrow night if you get your appetite back.” MJ explained. Malon smiled to hear the good news.

*** 

Back at Camp Crystal Lake, Aquarius took her kids to check the Voorhees’ cabin, to see if there are any plants that needed to be watered. But as Aquarius entered in, she was shocked to see the blood on the walls and the couch. “What the Hel-- hel... hel--li--coptors...” Aquarius didn’t want to cuss in front of her kids, even though Archie has heard worse cusses than Hell, but she didn’t want Kandy to know the word since she’s only a baby. “Archie... Take your sister home... There’s something I got to do.” Aquarius ordered. Archie was shocked by his mom’s reaction, however, he was more surprised by the mess and how loud the music was. “Come on, Kandy, lets go home to daddy.” Archie said to his baby sister.

After Archie took Kandy home, Aquarius decided to clean the place up while observing the cause for this disruption. She was going to clean the couch until her cellphone rang. 

“Hello?” Aquarius answered.

It was MJ that was on the phone from the hospital. “Hi Star, I’m just calling to ask you a favor, would you or Pennywise mind checking on Camp Crystal Lake, Jason was having the senses that something is wrong.” MJ explained.

Aquarius didn’t want MJ or Jason to know about the mess in the cabin, since she knew it might infuriate the family, especially Jason. “Of course I will, well heck, I’ll even clean up the place if you liked me to.” Aquarius offered.

While being unaware, Michael approaches the cabin and saw what he thought to be a ‘trespasser’, so he took out his knife and approach to her slowly with his knife raised. Aquarius senses someone’s presence so she had to cut the conversation short. “I love chatting with you, but I must go now, bye.” Aquarius hung up the phone and quickly did the spin attack on her still-on roller-skates; she may have dodged the knife, but the ‘stalker’ did not get knocked out. So she pounced on him. Michael tried to choke Aquarius to death, but she was quick thinking and grabbed a knife that he dropped and stabbed his arm. However, Michael was not affected by the knife stab; which worried her since she’s in a deadly position. 

Aquarius tried to remove his hand, but his grip is too strong. As she was slowly perishing, his grip loosened as he was being grabbed. Pennywise came at a nick of time; the truth is that Jason called Pennywise’s place earlier back at the hospital and answered it. MJ called from Aquarius’s cell, so it was strangely ironic. Pennywise lifted Michael in the air with a mad glare. “No one strangles my wife... except me!” Pennywise scolded. Michael did not show any reaction as usual, but whatever Michael is saying in his mind made Pennywise put him down. “You’re an acquaintance of Jason Voorhees?” Pennywise asked while still holding him by the shoulder. Aquarius finished coughing out blood before she spoke up severely. “Ask him why he trashed the place! There better be a promising explanation for his behavior, or else I’ll eat off his face...” Aquarius threatened. “You’re going to want to answer that question, because she’s a sin-muncher, and I’m sensing that you’re responsible for a full amount of sins.” Pennywise said. Michael was surprised that he can read his mind, so if he can read his mind, he can explain his reasons for this mess.

***

At the hospital, Malon was eating her lunch, a lot more than usual; which is a good sign that she’s hungry because it means that she’s starting to get better. “My goodness, Malon, you ate up all of your food like a vacuum.” MJ joked. “Well I was hungry... I’m starting to feel a little bit better each time.” Malon explained. Just then, nurse Linda came in. “Hello Malon, I just thought I come up to see how you are doing; I see you’ve eaten all of your lunch.” Linda assumes. Malon nodded with a smile. “Since you’re getting better, I thought I take you over to the play area; we have a special guest coming today.” Linda explained. “Can I mom?” Malon asked her mom. “Of course you can, and I’m sure daddy will let you as well.” MJ said while smiling at her husband. Jason nodded as he accepts the idea of Malon playing with the other kids, so she wouldn’t have to be cooped up on her bed.

Back at Camp Crystal Lake, Aquarius frustratedly scrubbed the floors while Michael watches. “Michael, will you please stop staring at me? it’s annoying because I can sense you!��� Aquarius said in a grumble. “Don’t be a corpse in the weeds Pretty-Blue, at least what Michael told me about him getting rid of the trespassers that broke-in was pretty noble.” Pennywise said. “You know what, that’s great, maybe we can give him a treat; or even better, let’s keep him; Archie has been asking for a pet this morning, Michael would be perfect, we just have to take him to the vet and have him neutered!” Aquarius said in a sarcastic and sassy tone. Pennywise just chuckles and crawled towards her to comfort her. “Don’t be so dramatic, I know what’s best for everyone; no subconscious mind tells a lie.” Pennywise reassures before he kissed Aquarius passionately. 

Without realizing, they noticed Michael actually wiping the couch, almost as if there’s something within him that is so toxic and disgusting to his character. “Let’s keep cleaning the place up for the Voorhees, then we shall do something together as a family with our kids.” Pennywise suggested. Aquarius nodded and agreed, even though Pennywise is not the kind of being that likes to do chores, but he does get a lot of TLC afterwards.

***

When Malon was being taken to the Play Area, Jason wrote a note to MJ about what he wanted to do. “I’m thinking of going back home to check on the place, is that alright with you?” Jason wrote. MJ frowned, she thought that her calling Aquarius would calm Jason’s nerves, she even heard from Malon that her dad also called the Gray’s place. However, she can’t really tell him what he can or can not do, but she did gave him a reasonable response. “I can’t really stop you, since it’s my turn to spend the night with Malon anyway, but you should ask Malon and see what she thinks.” MJ suggested. Jason nodded and decided to take her advice.

Jason walked over to the play area to see Malon with the question that he have wrote for her. He was watching Malon drawing and coloring, he tried to get her attention until he saw what she was drawing. “What’s that you coloring?” The little sick girl asked. “That’s me and daddy; he was always there for me whenever I needed him...” Then Malon noticed her daddy and waved at him happily. Jason waved back at his daughter with a tearful smile; he looked at the note and then back at Malon, he decided to not worry about his cabin, his family comes first, especially Malon’s, so he tared up the paper and threw it into the recycling bin. Jason was going to go back to her room, until he spotted a Shetland Pony heading towards the play area, he assumes that the pony was the ‘special guest’ that Linda was talking about.

Malon and the rest of the young patients went out to meet the little pony, Malon has never seen a little pony so tiny that Malon teared up over cuteness. She was going to pet it until the man grabbed her by the wrist to stop her. “Don’t touch him, the sign said to not touch.” The man said, he didn’t mean any harm, but Malon is still tearing up, so she decided to go back to her room. Only to realize that she doesn’t remember where she came from or how to get back to her room; the nurse was preoccupied that she wasn’t paying attention to Malon.

Luckily, her dad was close by, so he caught up to her and gently lay a hand on her. Malon turned around and hugged her daddy while tearing up. “I want to go back to my room!” Malon mumbled into his shirt. Jason rubbed her back to comfort her, he saw the whole situation with the man and his Shetland Pony; if he weren’t in a public place, he’d kill him in a instant for making his daughter cry, but he has to hold himself back and not make a scene. Eventually, Jason guided her to her room and put her up to her bed. “You’re back quickly, everything okay?” MJ asked. Malon shook her head and decided to sleep it through from her depression. Jason wrote a note to his wife and explained to her about what happened. “Aww... That’s not fair... Service animals were supposed to be used for little kids to cuddle, like dogs and puppies... Did she cry?” MJ asked. Jason nodded sadly as he almost cried himself. 

MJ got up and walked towards Malon and gave her a lingering kiss by the cheek, which gave Malon a half smile with a dimple; just like when she was a baby. Even though Jason is sad over Malon’s disappointing opportunity, he’s glad he didn’t decide on leaving for home, or else Malon would have gotten herself lost from wandering through the hospital. He’s grateful for listening to his own family instincts and not think too much about his home.

To Be Continued

[lyranova]

A Fractured Diamond

Episode 2: A New Team

Hi guys~! So here’s the second chapter of Diamond! I’ve been working on this for weeks and I have to admit I got really mad at myself over this because everything I have planned is for later chapters. Also, I really suck at naming spells so I apologize they’re not very good. But anyway I hope you guys enjoy this ☺️!

Word Count: 2,554

Warnings: Violence (but its not really graphic)

Neva was pissed to say the least, this was the last thing she wanted. She did not want to be sitting with three other strangers in the dining hall trying to get to know more about one another. She couldn’t believe the Captain ordered her to do this, to be in a small squad of her own. Why couldn’t he just let her be for a change? Why did he always have to stick his nose in her business? Neva watched as Mimosa’s mouth moved but wasn’t listening to a word she was saying, she wasn’t interested in any of it if she were being honest. The royal appeared to be sweet and kind, but Neva wondered if that’s how the girl actually was or if it’s what she wanted to project to others.

Klaus meanwhile was how she usually saw him; as a suck up to someone of a higher status than him, and dismissive of the ones that were of lower status. Yuno, on the other hand, was very intriguing. He was sitting silently like her, looking like he’d rather be anywhere else than where he currently was much like her. Neva looked him up and down for a moment; when he was standing he appeared to be tall, he was lean, had jet black hair, and gold eyes. Yep this kid was going to end up being very popular with the ladies. Until they found out he was a commoner that is. Neva was pulled out of her observations when she heard her name.

“ What about you Neva? What’s your magical affinity?” Mimosa asked with slight curiosity, Neva crossed her arms and slightly shrugged her shoulder.

“ Diamond magic.” She answered simply, knowing the reaction she’d get. Mimosa’s eyes grew to the size of cylinders and she let out a small gasp while Yuno’s eyes only widened slightly but otherwise didn’t have much of a reaction.

“ D-Diamond magic? Does that mean you’re..?” Mimosa trailed off, seeming to be slightly weary of the answer she would receive.

“ Don’t worry I was born and raised in the Clover Kingdom. Otherwise I’m sure I would’ve been arrested by now.” Neva assured her with a small wave of her hand as the young girl seemed to release a breath she was holding. It wasn’t the first nor would it be the last time people asked her that question. Mimosa had then turned her attention to Yuno.

“ What about you Yuno? What’s your affinity?” Yuno turned to look at the royal.

“ Uh, wind magic.” Neva blinked at his answer ‘wind magic? Any mage that I’ve encountered with that power wasn’t very special? So what is it about him that has everyone so impressed?’ She thought curiously, she had to admit, it was going to be a very interesting first mission tomorrow.

———-

The next morning the four Golden Dawn members went out on their first mission together. It was to clear out a small group of bandits, nothing too complicated. Neva at first couldn’t understand why the Captain had sent them out on such a small mission like this, but the more she thought about it, the more it made sense. He wanted them to get used to working together. Neva wasn’t sure how well they’d work together since all their magics weren’t really compatible with one another; her’s was diamond, Yuno’s was wind, Mimosa was plant, and Klaus was steel. So how in the world would they be able to work with each other? Neva huffed. ‘The Captains probably thought of that as well.’ She shook her head, before hearing Mimosa call out to them from the steel carriage she and Klaus were in.

“ We’re almost there. It should be right in that clearing!” Neva and Yuno nodded, both having chosen to use their brooms instead of riding with Klaus and Mimosa.

They slowly eased down before landing a few feet away from the campsite and quickly hiding behind a few bushes. They watched as the men seemed to be standing around the fire, talking and eating, the perfect time to strike.

“ So what’s the plan?” Mimosa whispered as she turned toward the others, Neva smirked. ‘I can handle this easily!’ She thought as she went to stand up but suddenly she felt a rush of air fly past her and when she looked over she noticed Yuno was gone.

“ Where’d he go?” Klaus asked in a hurried whisper before Mimosa pointed toward the bandits camp and all three of their eyes widened at the sight.

Yuno was currently standing in the middle of the campsite, a vortex of wind swirling around him. He was currently trying to fight all the bandits at once! Neva gritted her teeth and quickly ran out from behind the bushes, with Klaus and Mimosa following.

“ Diamond creation magic: Diamond Shower!” She shouted as she pulled out her grimoire. Shards of diamonds began to rain from the sky and were aimed precisely at the bandits, although she wasn’t aiming to hurt them, she at least wanted to knock them out or immobilize them. She smirked as she was able to pin one to a tree and another to the ground, she quickly turned as she felt warmth near her side.

“ Flame magic: Dragon’s breath!” She heard a flame mage shout, luckily she was able to feel the warmth before she even heard him shout, she quickly dodged the spiral of flame and when she turned toward him she quickly made a hammer out of diamond.

“ Diamond magic: Diamond Hammer!” She quickly swung the mallet before the flame mage could even blink, hitting him square in the stomach, she heard him make an ‘oof’ sound before he went flying into a tree and was knocked out cold. Neva looked around and noticed the others had taken care of the rest of the bandits, Klaus had chained a few to a tree, and Yuno had either knocked them out cold or immobilized them with his wind magic. Mimosa stood by with a big smile on her face.

“ Good work team!” She cheered as she clapped her hands together, Klaus let out a sigh as he pushed his glasses up his nose.

“ It would’ve been better if one of us hadn’t rushed in without discussing a plan first.” He said as he glared slightly at Yuno, who only stared back.

“ It would’ve taken too long. They were right there and it was the perfect time to strike, they were distracted, had their guards down, there wasn’t a better opportunity.” Yuno told him bluntly, causing Klaus to glare further as Neva and Mimosa watched them.

“ M-Maybe so! But we still should have discussed it as a team!” Klaus argued as Yuno began to walk away. “ Don’t walk away from me! We’re not done here!” He shouted after him and Yuno just continued walking.

“ Oh I like him.” Neva said with a smirk as she followed Yuno, Mimosa shrugged at Klaus and also walked away.

“ Are you all going to at least help me with the bandits?!”

————-

After loading the bandits up, the small team carried them back to the capital and dropped them off at the prison before heading back to their headquarters. As they were flying back Neva couldn’t stop herself from watching Yuno; she had honestly thought the rumors about him were just that, rumors. She had no idea they would actually be true, but even she could feel how strong his mana was back in the woods, how powerful he was. It was like he was blessed by it or something, and in all honesty, it made Neva a little jealous. But the more she thought about it, the more she got a wicked little thought in her head.

‘I wonder,’ She smirked at the thought. ‘If I could convince him to help me become Captain.’ Yuno must’ve noticed her eyes on him because he turned to look at her. She jumped slightly and quickly turned away, missing the suspicious look in his eyes.

After the four of them had made it back to the Golden Dawn headquarters they began walking toward the dining hall for dinner when Neva cleared her throat.

“ Hey Yuno, do you have a minute? I’d like to talk to you about something.” Neva asked, Yuno blinked in confusion.

“ Uh, sure? I guess.” He said before Mimosa and Klaus continued walking toward the hall, saying they’d save the two of them a seat. “ What’s up?” He asked after they had gone inside. Neva sat on the short courtyard wall and looked at him.

“ I just wanted to say that I underestimated you. When I first heard the rumors about you, I’ll admit I was skeptical, especially when you said you had wind magic.” Neva started as she crossed one leg over the other. “ But I was pleasantly surprised, so I apologize for my earlier doubts.” He shrugged.

“ It’s fine. You’re not the first person to underestimate me.” He told her as he placed one hand on his hip before turning to look at her. “ Although, I doubt that's the only reason you called me out here.” Neva almost laughed at how perceptive he was, ‘No wonder my father always told me to never judge a commoner. Sometimes, they’re smarter than they want you to think.’.

“ You’re right, there is something else I wanted to ask you,” she started before looking down at her shoes. “ What’s your goal?” She asked, he looked slightly taken aback by her question but he quickly recovered.

“ To become the Wizard King.” Yuno told her, she could hear the slightest amount of passion in his voice. She looked back up at him with a small smirk on her face.

“ I can help you reach that goal, but I have one condition.” Neva told him, and instantly he frowned at her. “ You see, I have a goal myself; to become Captain of the Golden Dawn someday and I believe we can help each other.” His eyes narrowed skeptically.

“ I can try and get us the more serious missions, the ones that will help us rise up the ranks and if I’m being 100% honest, you’ll rise up the ranks faster than I will. So all I ask is that when you rise up to the rank of Captain, because you will eventually, that you make me your Vice Captain and when you become the wizard king, that you make me the Captain of the Golden Dawn.” She proposed, and instantly his face went blank. Neva hated it when she couldn’t read people's faces, it made her nervous.

“ Sounds like you need me more than I need you.” He told her after a minute and it shocked her so much she nearly fell off the wall. ‘My proposal was excellent! Wasn’t it?’ She thought in disbelief, she quickly pulled herself back up the wall and glared.

“ T-That’s not it-.” She started but he cut her off.

“ Yes it is. You said it yourself; I will eventually rise up the ranks, all the way to Captain in your opinion, so why would I need your help if you believe I’ll do it even without it?” Yuno questioned, Neva looked down at the ground. He had a good point. She basically gave him every reason not to agree to her deal, ‘Wow, I really suck at this.’ She thought with a small huff before hearing Yuno sigh.

“ Do you know why you suck at trying to manipulate people?” He asked her. “ It’s because you’re not a manipulative person, I’ve only known you for a few hours but even I can see that. You don’t need my help, or anyone’s for that matter, to make it to Captain.” He added with a small shrug, Neva’s face turned a slight shade of pink as she looked up at him.

“ Heh. It’s funny, I’m sure at least a majority of this squad would disagree with you on all those points.” She muttered and she saw him roll his eyes.

“ Then let them, what does it matter what they think?” He asked her. “ Come on, let’s go get dinner.” He added as he began walking toward the dining hall door, Neva stood up and followed after him before suddenly remembering.

“ You go ahead and eat, I have to go report to the Captain.” She told him before walking past him, Yuno nodded at her before opening the dining hall door and walking inside.

————

Neva made her way to Vangeance’s office, a small smile on her face. Even though she completely failed at trying to get Yuno to help her, it felt really good having someone to talk to, someone other than the Captain anyway. She came upon his door and began to knock but she stopped herself; it sounded like he had company. She couldn’t make out the other voice as it was a hushed whisper, but she knew it wasn’t her Captain’s voice. She placed her ear against the door to see if she could hear any bits of the conversation, but they were just being too quiet. It sounded urgent if the tones of their voices signaled anything. Neva heard his boots approach the door and she quickly pulled away and held her hand up, as though she were just about to knock on his door. When Vangeance pulled it open to see Neva on the other side he was very surprised.

“ Neva, I wasn’t expecting you back so soon. I take it the mission went well?” He asked her, his voice calmer than what she had heard a moment ago. Neva couldn’t stop the frown from appearing on her face as she tried to look around him to see inside his office.

“ Uh, yeah it went fine. Is there someone in your office?” She asked turning to look at him, a small smile appeared on his face as he tilted his head.

“ No why? Is something wrong?” He asked her his voice, sounding a little confused, she blushed slightly and scratched the back of her head nervously.

“ N-No nothing wrong, I just thought…” Neva trailed off nervously, Vangeance chuckled a bit before patting the top of her head.

“ Its ok, you’re probably just tired. Go get some dinner and then try to get some rest. You’ve earned it today.” He said as began to walk away. “ Oh by the way, I’ll be gone for a while, I was called away on urgent business. So if you need anything, you’ll have to try and get a hold of Langris. Goodnight Neva.” He added as he continued walking away. She turned to look into his office and her eyes widened.

It was completely empty. It had only been him inside the office, Neva quickly turned to look at her Captains retreating form. She had never known him to be the type to talk to himself and it would be even more odd if he used a different voice when doing so. Neva’s face immediately became concerned.

Something was wrong with her Captain.

————

I’m sorry it’s not very good 😔. I’m thinking about skipping ahead a little bit or maybe trying to talk to some of my mutual writers because I’m really stuck on what I should write next since I’m trying really hard not to directly copy canon events. But anyway I hope you guys enjoyed this I apologize if you didn’t and I will try better next time. Have a good day everyone 💞~!

[tomiokai]

Between The Pages || Spencer Reid

Masterlist

{not my gif, originally posted by @toyboxboy​}

A/N: Honestly there are so many cafe AU’s and it’s crazy how I’ve read so many of them. But per usual I wanted to write my own version with my own twisty twist. This fic has literally taken me so long to write! I just sometimes couldn’t find the motivation to write it and then I’ll just abandon it for a period of time and I HATE writing two fics at a time because I personally can’t do it because, I’m a control freak and everything needs to be in order so if you’re a writer and you can write two fics at a time, please teach me, you’re so gifted. IMPORTANT! Spencer had to go to prison and got out around February and May but this fic is set around the Christmas season so just roll with it. Fake dates. They aren’t real!! If you are not happy with this AU, the door is that way. ——> Also I write in Canadian English so some of the words might look weird. 

Summary: Y/n works at a very unique cafe, it’s a cafe plus a library, where there are shelves of the most classic books to the new poorly written rom-coms. A perfect, warm, and cozy place, to read, study, or even to hang out. Spencer Reid was one of the usual there and he may or may not have swept Y/n off her feet over the years. A poorly written rom-com following the lives of Y/n and Spencer Reid. Anti prison to post-prison Spencer.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Category: Fluff

Warning: Fluff. Angst if you squint. 

Word Count: 7.3k

_

November 30th:

‘Between The Pages’ was quite the most unusual name for a cafe, I had thought when I first started working here. The cafe was a cozy little building sandwiched between two bigger buildings, bringing all the attention it deserved away from it, but that’s how I had liked it. Only the usual elite that know about this place and a few drop by’s once in a while ever enters the small building, everyone who comes into the shop falls in love with it immediately, giving them a sense of home. The insides of the shop gave you old fashion tiny cute library vibes. The walls were covered in bookshelves full of books ranging from the classics to the very new ones that I would bring in every time I made my way to the book shop eight streets down. Through the door to your left was the display case for all the delicious baked goods and the counter where you place your order and pay. Where the door was, there were two windows and on one side there was a small comfy couch with a small wooden coffee table in front of it and the other had two couches facing each other with a coffee table in the center (the couples hot spot). Smack in the center of the room was a big round table where the college girls like to camp out for their study sessions, and around the room were numerous armchairs and giant fuzzy bean bags. The area was filled with warm colours, dark greens, dark reds, beiges, and browns. Small plants and succulents hung out around the windowsills and tables giving the area a nice nature vibe. 

Memorizing each and everyone’s orders was my very special skill. The usuals were a group college girls (a new set every four years) that come for their study sessions every Friday and Saturday, a group of teen boys that storm the bakery section of the cafe once a week during their lunch break, a nice middle-aged lawyer that stops by every morning for coffee, which might I add had given me his business card, says if we ever needed help we should call him, two young couples that regularly have double dates, a few other individuals, and a very nice looking man around my age. He was my favourite customer, he came to the shop almost everyday ordering a single large cup of coffee with milk and loads of sugar, but when it became fall his coffee would be switched to a pumpkin spice latte. 

Between The Pages have become my home the second I graduated college. The little old lady who owned this shop had taken me in as a daughter of her own, and I had my own room above the shop. I was a writer at heart, I loved writing stories that I would usually share with the bunch of college girls and my colleague Chloe who might also be my best friend. The life I’m living in was humble yet the best, I couldn’t think of another way to live. This shop gave me time to pursue my love of writing and interact with some of the best people I have ever met. I earn enough money that I am comfortable with, and live a life nicely, considering if I wasn’t here I would be nowhere. Let’s just say all my living known relatives are all gone after an explosive fire at a family reunion I had not attended in my Junior year of College.  Call it lucky but unlucky. 

Today was a quiet day, Thursday. The group of teen boys had already passed by causing Chloe and me to rebake today’s special treats again. Chloe was a wedding photographer (she’s here usually 60% of the time) but she also loved hanging out with me so much so that she got a job here with me after the year we graduated from college. We were literally joint to the hip together, ever since grade three when I first threw up on her because she showed me a disturbing picture of a giant spider with wings. We were in each other’s same classes, had millions of sleepovers, and we even went to the same college together. She lived in the room right beside mine, so yeah we are literally joint to the hip. I baked the sweets and made the drinks while Chloe usually took care of the sandwiches, wraps, and organizing everyday menu items. 

“I noticed that your boyfriend didn’t come today,” Chloe said as she grabbed out a freshly baked tray of cookies. 

“For the last time Chloe, Spencer isn’t my boyfriend,” I said rolling my eyes as I snatched a cookie off of her tray. 

“Ugh yeah, you guys literally look in love every time you see each other.” Chloe shot back. 

“Not true” I snapped.

“Not to mention your crippling crush on the guy.” Chloe sang with a smug lip on her lips. 

My eyes flew open and scanned the empty cafe. “You’re lucky no one’s here,” I said flipping her off. 

“Just watch Y/n. I better be your wedding photographer.” Chloe laughed stacking the freshly baked cookies in a perfect tower in the display case. 

“Not happening as much as I want it to happen.” I laughed back biting into the cookie in my hand.

 For the past few years, Spencer was the only person I had a crush on, he was always here and it just felt as if we had known each other for years, which isn’t a lie considering I have worked in this cafe since senior year of college and he started coming not long after. We got along very well and we always talked in the morning when he waited for his coffee. We knew so much about each other yet so little. 

“Is it okay if you run this place a few more hours on your own? I have some unfinished wedding photos to edit, one being editing the mother in laws white dress to another colour,” Chloe said as she removed her apron.

“How does one not know to never wear white to a wedding that’s not theirs, but yeah sure,” I responded pulling out a stool from under the counter. 

I watched as Chloe made her way to the back room where the staircase was and turned back around pulling out my laptop to the horror story I was currently writing. 

As I typed chapter twelve of my story the little bell on our shop door rang and my head turned to the grandfather clock in the corner and saw it was two hours before closing and then to the door. 

There stood Spencer, unusual to say the least he usually comes in the mornings. He was in dress pants with a dress shirt and a purple tie, unusual again, but as always his hair was tousled around wore a huge smile on his pink lips, travel bag hanging from his shoulders, and book in hand. 

“Hey!” I called brightly hopping off the stool I sat on. 

“Hey Y/n,” Spencer said back as he made his way to his favourite seat at the back of the room. 

“The usual?” I asked. 

“You know it,” Spencer answered sitting down and opening his big book. 

I smiled as I got out Spencer’s favourite mug, a simple black mug with a single purple stripe running through the middle of the cup. It always amazed me how fast he was able to read, spending basically seven seconds on each page. 

I poured Spencer’s coffee into the mug and added milk and loads of sugar into it. I picked the mug up and grabbed a slice of strawberry cheesecake and a fork and slowly made my way to where Spencer was seated. 

“Here I said, setting the mug and cheesecake onto the small coffee table in front of him. I then made my way to sit in the armchair right across from him. 

Spencer looked at the cheesecake and then at me quizzically. 

“It’s on me,” I said, realizing.  

“Oh no I can’t do that,” Spencer said, pulling out a few extra bills and holding them across the table for me. 

“No, really it’s on me.” I laughed pushing his hand back to him. 

Spencer closed his book and set it on the table and picked up the slice of cheesecake the fork and took a bite. “This is some good cheesecake.” He pointed out.

“Thank you,” I said with a smile. “Hey, you usually come here bright and early in the mornings. What's with the sudden change?” I asked out of curiosity. 

“Oh, I just got off from a long day of work and wanted to come here and relax,” Spencer answered, taking a sip of his coffee. 

“Wow, we’ve known each other for literally years now and I still don’t know what you do for a living, mind as I ask,” I questioned watching him. 

He set his coffee down and answered, “Oh I work for the FBI, I’m a profiler. What about you? Any other jobs other than here?” He asked out of curiosity.

“Wow, very impressive..” I laughed. Spencer joined in. “This is actually my only job, aside from another thing,” I responded. 

“Well, since I told you that I’m an FBI agent, will you tell me YOUR very secret job?” Spencer spoke.

“If I tell you, you have to keep it a secret,” I responded arching an eyebrow.

Spencer exaggerated his thinking face, looking up to the ceiling then back to me with a grin, “I will,” he said. 

“Well, I’m an author. But you won’t find my books by searching my name, I have a pen name.” I said as I stood up. I ran to a nearby shelf and took out one of the hard copy books and ran back. I hid it behind my back and spoke again. “Remember, secret,” I said sternly.

“Secret,” Spencer repeated, bringing his fingers to his lips to ‘seal’ his lips. 

I laughed as I pulled the book from behind my back and handed it to Spencer. 

Spencer scanned the book and looked back up at me with a shocked look on his face. “This is one of my favourite modern-day books,” Spencer exclaimed.

My face immediately lit up and I asked, “Really?”

Spencer nodded his head eagerly. 

I leaned back into my chair and whispered. “Wow, for a guy who reads like 100 books a month, he actually thinks mine is really good.” 

 Spencer broke out in a laugh and said, “I actually have the first edition copy of this,” placing the book onto the table. 

I sat back up straighter this time and exclaimed, “I’m actually writing a new horror book right now and my writing has improved a significant amount after I was done reading one of Shakespeare’s books.”

“Mind if I take a peak?” Spencer asked, finishing his cheesecake. 

I mocked him and looked to the ceiling with a finger on my cheek “thinking really hard’. “No.” I laughed.

“Why not, I won’t tell.” Spencer jokingly pleaded.

“Still no,” I laughed, “but once it’s finished I’ll let you have the first copy before I officially launch it.”

“I better be first to read it, I’m like your biggest fan.” He laughed. 

“False,” I answered, “my biggest fan is actually a lady named Penelope Garcia that sent me a huge gift basket, with a letter that proclaimed her love for my books.” 

“Wait did you say, Penelope Garcia?” Spencer asked looking shocked.

“Yeah. Is something wrong?” I asked.

“No, no, nothing wrong,” Spencer laughed, “She’s actually my colleague.”

“What a small world,” I responded amazed. 

“Yeah, now I have to fight her for number one fan,” Spencer said with amusement in his voice.

“Oh we’ll have to see Agent Reid,” I joked. 

“Actually it’s Doctor,” Spencer corrected. 

“Wait but you’re an agent,” I stated.

“Yes, but I’m titled doctor,” Spencer said matter of factly. 

“Alright Doctor Reid,” I laughed. 

We sat together discussing multiple things with each other and we just clicked. Lucky for him, he got me to spill a little on the new book I was writing and even gave me a few ideas from some of the cases he has dealt with. I asked him about his job and he immediately started talking joyfully, he really loved his job. He also talked about his team a lot.  

“Hey lovebirds,” I heard someone call. My head whipped around towards the counter and glared at Chloe so hard.

“We’re just talking,” I called back with annoyance dripping from my voice. I turned back around towards Spencer and saw that he was very flustered, his cheeks were all rosy and red. This made me blush seeing him blush. “I’m sorry for my friend, she’s a little crazy in the head,” I whispered the last part.

“No, no that’s fine,” Spencer laughed. He had found it amusing.  

Ring, Ring. 

Spencer pulled out his phone and held up a finger to his lips. His face was blank throughout the whole conversation, at times his demeanor would stiffen. After his phone call, he started chugging the rest of his coffee, and putting his satchel on, “I’m really sorry, duty calls,” He said.

“Hey wait, here I’ll pack some sweets for your team.” I got up quickly scurrying towards the desert display.

“Oh no you don’t have to do that,” Spencer said, a small smile on his lips. 

“No, no I insist, we’re closing in like 5 minutes anyways, we can’t let these go to waste,” I answered, grabbing out a light purple desert box and placing multiple chocolate chip cookies,  slices of pie and cake into the box. I closed it up and ran back over to Spencer and handed the box to him. His hands brushed against mine when he took the box from my hands and butterflies erupted in my stomach. 

I bit my lip and smiled, “See you, hopefully, tomorrow,” I said.  

“Maybe. Unless the case is going to be overnight, thanks for the sweet, it was really sweet of you.” Spencer responded with a wink pushing the door to the shop open.

“Bye!” I yelled back as he left through the door.

I turned away from the door with a big smile forming on my pink lips. I walked over to the table where we sat and picked up the mug, fork, and plate and carried them over to where Chloe was washing the dishes. 

“Dude you’re whipped.” Chloe laughed, drying the wet dishes. 

“I know,” I responded with a big smile still on my face. 

-

December 1st:

It was early in the morning and I was down extra early to bake pastries and cakes, the sign was switched to open and Chloe was sitting criss-cross applesauce by the special menus board drawing cute little cartoons. After I put in the last tray of danishes into the oven I started up the coffee pot for the early birds. Mornings at Between The Pages were always calm and peaceful, Chloe and I would both wake up, do our parts and not talk till 11:00 am enjoying each other's silence, then the morning guests were always calm and nice too, we would exchange some friendly words, I would give them their coffee and they’ll wave goodbye and leave. Here at the cafe, there's no such thing as a lunch rush so that's a big weight lifted off Chloe and I’s shoulders. 

As I was frosting the danishes the bell that hung on our door rang. I looked up from my frosting to see Spencer in a black suit walk in, my face immediately lit up but then dropped when a blonde female walked in right after him. The female had pretty blonde hair that was in loose curls with small butterfly clips on either side of her head and perfectly cut bangs, she wore a pretty light pink dress with black lace on it, over top of her dress she had a cute white cropped cardigan. Never would I have expected her to be his type, but no one’s judging, I personally loved her style, although I was jealous of her. Maybe they're just friends. Hopefully. 

I put on the best smile that I can manage and walked to the cash register and quietly waited for them to walk to me. Before I could register what was happening the blonde lady rushed up to me with a squeal and excitedly said, “Hi, I’m Penelope Garcia, Spencer’s coworker, you must be Y/n, Spencer was talking about. Oh and thank you so much for the sweets yesterday! The whole team loved them.” 

Spencer was talking about me?? That was what hit first, then reality. “Nice to meet you and yeah I am Y/n, and I’m glad you liked the treats!” I happily said back. I already liked her completely leaving my jealousy behind me. I turned to Spencer next and smiled even bigger, “Hey Spencer. You want usual?” 

“Hey Y/n, yeah the usual,” Spencer responded smiling back at me.

“And you Penelope?” I turned back to her. 

“Oh I’ll take a french vanilla with whipped cream and mini marshmallows please,” Penelope responded. 

“Hey! I’m Chloe!” Chloe cheerfully explained coming up from behind me and wrapping her left arm around my shoulder. “I’m Y/n’s best friend!”

“Hey, Chloe.” Spencer and Garcia said at the same time, causing everyone to laugh. 

“Chloe, could you get their drinks for me?” I asked walking to the back table to pick up a dessert box.

“Yeah sure,” She said to me then turned back to Spencer and Penelope. “Just a moment.”

I picked up the desert box and started placing two dozen danishes in it. They were  strawberry, blueberry, and chocolate cream danishes. I closed off the box and walked over to Penelope and Spencer. “On the house, for the team,” I said handing the box to Spencer with a wink. 

“Y/n! This is too nice of you, here let me pay.” Spencer rumbled reaching for a few more bills from his wallet.

“Spencer no, it's on the house,” I laughed, pushing his hands away. 

“Are you sure Y/n?” He asked.

“YES,” I exclaimed. 

“Oh you're the sweetest Y/n,” Penelope squealed joyfully, as Chloe handed them their drinks.

 “Be safe!” I called to Spencer and Penelope as they walked out the door of the cafe.

“We’ll try.” They responded together before disappearing around the corner. 

My heart pounded in my chest as I stared at the closed door, my mind never leaving the picture of Spencer smiling in my mind. How was I supposed to do anything if all I could think about is Spencer Reid? That stupid adorable smile of his whips me up every time. I snapped myself out of my trance and picked up my piping bag filled with creamy cream cheese icing and resumed icing the uniced danishes. 

The morning came and went in a blur, regular customers and newcomers here and there, the danishes were a hit and sold out fast with the coffee ordered. I was currently mixing some brownie batter when my favourite group of college girls walked in, they took their usual afternoon seats at the center round table and started pulling out their laptops, textbooks, and homework. 

“Usuals?” I asked as I already started their lattes and mochas.

“As always!” Cherry White, one of the blonde girls replied, rapidly typing on her laptop. 

After I poured their drinks into mugs for the girls I brought the mugs to their table. Their heads were all buried inside their textbooks and laptops studying feverishly. I placed all their orders by each girl and watched as they intently worked. Papers and pens were already scattered everywhere in a short time, laptops open and bright as the clicking of the keyboards filled the warm homey air. 

“Studying for midterms, girls?” I asked as I placed the last girl's coffee by her hand. 

A few of them responded with a quick ‘yup’ and went straight back to their studies.

I went back to baking my brownies while daydreaming about Spencer. The thing’s I would let that man do to me, I thought as I placed the brownies into the oven. 

I pulled out my own laptop and continued from where I left off from yesterday night, the chapter I was currently working on was almost done and I had used some of Spencer’s great ideas. Trying my best to focus on the task at hand my mind just kept slipping away to Spencer and the conversations he and I had had yesterday night. 

“Look!” I heard Darcy Shawma, a cute Asian girl with braces say. She was pointing to the windows by the front of the shop. Following her fingers' direction, I find soft snow falling from the afternoon sky. I sighed in awe as it was the first snowfall of the season indicating it was the perfect time to start baking Christmas sweets. 

Ditching chapter 13 of my book, I pulled up a new search tab and began scavenging google for the best Christmas baking recipes. As I searched I could already just taste the delicious gingerbread in my mouth and the sweet smell of sugar cookies. This had reminded me that I needed to get the annual Christmas tree out soon. This year I had already decided that I would get Spencer Reid a Christmas present. We’d known each other for so long now I just thought it would be a good idea. 

For the rest of that night, I surfed the net for yummy Christmas treats to bake and possible presents for Spencer. 

-

December 2nd:

The next day Spencer was a no show. Not thinking much of it I assumed he was away on a case as usual. Chloe and I started putting up the Christmas decorations. 

-

December 6th: 

He hadn’t showed up again for the fifth day in a row now. It could just be a long case, nothing to be too worried about. The book was going great. I was now halfway done. 

-

December 13th: 

Now I was getting worried. He never in his life has done this. He never not came back after a week. I didn’t have any contact with him so I had no way to know whether he was out on a very long case or he got hurt or if he got tired of the place or oven ME. 

-

December 14th:

I had gone full panic mode. When he hadn’t shown up in the morning I had a whole meltdown on Chloe’s shoulder. She tried telling me maybe he was just away on his own holiday but I didn’t believe her because every year he would tell me. 

-

December 16th:

To cope with Spencer being gone for so long I decided to start decorating gingerbread houses. They turned into piles of gingerbread frosting and candy, they looked as if they were going to be a part of Halloween rather than Christmas. They failed big time. That afternoon the group of College girls came by and they had gotten me a present! I was shocked and very flattered that they thought of me. They explained that it was their senior year of College and that next year they would be leaving, they noticed that I was constantly typing on my laptop that they had gotten me a brand new and updated laptop. The rest of the afternoon we hung out and decorated the leftover gingerbread houses together before they left for their holiday vacation with their families and friends. 

-

December 20th: 

Once again I had another meltdown but this time there were no witnesses, we had closed down for the holidays and Chloe was off in New York with her family. She invited me to come with her but I politely declined and stayed behind in case Spencer came. The book was finally done and the first rough copy was printed. After the holiday’s I would bring my book to my publishing company and they could take care of it from there. As for the first copy as promised, I tied the stack of paper that formed a story with a single red ribbon running horizontally and vertically across the book with a pretty bow in the center for Spencer. It was the best gift from my heart. Along with the first copy of my book, I wrote Spencer a letter of confession where I poured my heart out about my feelings for him. 

Dear Dr. Spencer Reid,

Merry Christmas! You’ve been gone for a really long time. I hope you’re doing alright! It’s so unusual not to make your daily coffee loaded with sugar. Chloe started asking about you too. We miss you, you know? 

I miss you.

We’ve known each other for so long now. Ever since I graduated from University you started coming here too. You fell in love with the place just like I did, I could tell by the expressions on your face. Ever since that day you started coming every possible day possible. I baked a strawberry cheesecake today in hopes the smell will attract you back. Sadly it didn't. 

When you walk in through that door everyday my day immediately gets 100x better. Your smile literally radiates serotonin to me. (Please don’t correct me on that, I know that’s impossible.) I really miss your smile, your voice, and your everything really. I wish you would walk through that door right now. 

By now you have probably picked up that I like you, I make it very obvious. I LIKE YOU SPENCER REID. There I said it. Chloe has been egging me on for forever to tell you. The day you walked through that door I fell for you hard, I was young and naive but even now that I have grown into an intelligent woman I still like you, you’re something else, Spencer. 

I hope this doesn’t affect our friendship, Spencer. I really like what we have right now but if it could grow into something more I would love that. 

Bottom line I think I love you, Spencer. God, I don’t think. I do! I love you so much! My heart hurts when I don’t see you, it hurts me when I think about you getting hurt or even seeing you with other girls. I love you, Spencer. I hope you’re safe and you’re having a good Christmas. 

With unhealthy amounts of love, Y/n Y/l/n.

-

December 25th: 

He didn’t come again. I left his gift leaning on the glass of the cafe with Spencer’s name written in loopy holiday cursive indicating it was for him and that he’d know it was for him and pick it up if he decided to walk past. He didn’t. For Christmas that year, I sat at the armchairs by the fireplace drinking hot cocoa and eating gingerbread cookies while watching SpongeBob cartoons on my new laptop. To be honest it was a sad way to spend Christmas. 

-

December 31st:

The cafe was re-opened up again. Spencer’s gift was tucked inside a cabinet where I kept my personal things downstairs. He still didn’t come. The worry was now burning inside me. I thought about just showing up at the FBI and asking for Spencer, but he and I weren’t anything. I had no reason to be there. 

-

January 5th:

My book was now officially launched. I tried holding it back for as long as I could but the due date was fast approaching and I had no choice but to publish it. The copies sold out fast and I already got new fan mail. I may have promised Spencer he would be the first person to read it but he was late and never showed up but he would still have the first-ever copy if he ever came back I suppose. Chloe also got back!

-

January 17th: 

The teenage boy’s stormed the bakery. The college girls finally return. The old lady, Granny Lizzie I would call her that owned the shop passed away sadly.

-

January 20th:

It was a sad day, it was Granny Lizzie’s funeral. I inherited the cafe in her will. 

-

January 29th:

Snowstorm. 

-

February 7th:

Chloe’s birthday! We shut down the cafe for three days and she and I flew out to LA together to celebrate her birthday. Lots of drinking. Maybe even a hookup. 

-

February 14th:

Chloe got asked out. No Spencer. Valentine day dates overflow the cafe. Red velvet cheesecake cookies, big hit. 

-

February 26th:

Started on a new book. More mental breakdowns. I really missed Spencer. Snow is gone now.

-

March 4th:

 Discovered one of the couples got divorced and no longer came to the cafe. Bummer they were really nice. 

-

March 20th: 

Rain. Closed off early to lay in the rain on the top of the roof. Relaxing. Cried for Spencer. 

-

March 26th: 

Spencer! 

-

10 minutes until closing.

The bell to the cafe rang and I boringly glanced at the door, not a single interest in me. I hadn’t seen Spencer in so long I gave up in hope. A tall man appeared in the doorway, he had longish curly hair and wore a tight black suit with a purple tie. It took me a moment to realize who it was.

“SPENCER!” I yelled as he approached the counter; the way he walked and carried himself changed, he no longer had a doubt in his steps, his strides were now confident and long. He carried himself with confidence and security and looked like he didn’t have a care in the world, he was more relaxed now and not uptight and stiff. 

My whole mood changed completely, I was no longer sad or bored and was now full of energy and excitement. Ditching the register I ran around back to get to the other side of the counter. As soon as I was close enough to Spencer I jumped into his arms and squeezed him tight. Immediately he responded and hugged me tight and held my weight. 

“Where were you?” I whispered, not letting Spencer go. 

“I was in prison,” He whispered back, his voice cracking. 

“Wait what?” I asked in disbelief but that wasn’t enough for me to let go of him. It didn’t matter. 

“I was framed for murder,” He responded no hesitation. 

I immediately relaxed again and melted away in the hug. 

“I missed you!” I grumbled, finally pulling away from the hug. 

“I know, I missed you too,” Spencer whispered. 

“Can I just kiss you!” I blurted out suddenly. 

Not needing to be told twice Spencer immediately captured my lips in his. His lips were what I had imagined soft against mine, and moulded perfectly into mine. The kiss was sweet but also hungry yet still gentle, his hands held my waist as mine tangled into his soft curls. It was probably the best kiss I have ever had. Scratch that it was the best kiss I’ve ever had. 

“I have something for you,” I whispered, pressing my forehead against his, our nose tickling each other. 

“Mhm, and what’s that?” He asked, smiling. 

“Go grab a seat,” I responded, already running around the corner to get Spencer’s very late Christmas present. 

Swinging open the cabinet door excitedly, I grabbed my wrapped gift for Spencer. 

Gripping the three-month-old gift tightly, I made my way quickly back to where Spencer was sitting. Our spot, I would like to say. 

“This is for you,” I said, handing him the gift with a wide smile. “You were supposed to receive it on Christmas,” I finished with a shrug. 

“You didn’t have to Y/n,” Spencer said, unwrapping the gift.

“I definitely had too,” I reassured with a warm smile.

“Y/n is this what I think it is?” Spencer asked, picking up the first-ever copy of my semi-new book. 

“Mhm, as promised Spencer you get the first copy, even though you weren’t able to be the first one to read it.” I shrugged. 

“This is great! I don’t mind, it was something both of us couldn’t control,” Spencer responded, picking up the letter I had written for him. 

“Read it!” I exclaimed.

Spencer nodded and unfolded the perfectly folded letter. It barely took him a minute to read the letter, it looked as if he just scanned the letter with his eyes but in reality he definitely memorized it. After his eyes landed at the bottom of the page he slowly looked back up to meet my eyes. 

“I love you too,” He breathed. 

“I’m s-sorry can you say that again, I heard you the first time, I just need to re-hear you again to make sure,” I stuttered happy tears escaping my eyes. 

Whipping the tears away Spencer leaned close to my ear and whispered, “Y/n Y/l/n I love you.”

“This is probably the best thing that has happened to me ever since my Junior year of University.” I happily cried. 

“Me too,” Spencer said.

“Does this mean we’re together?” I asked suddenly. 

“Yes, this does,” He responded.

“Good. I’ve waited for this for so long,” I breathed. 

“All throughout prison you were the only thing I thought about, other than getting out and trying to stay alive,” Spencer said.

“That’s flattering yet scary,” I responded with a light chuckle. 

“I guess it is,” Spencer responded. 

-

April 5th:

“SPENCER, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING! THE DRY INGREDIENTS AND THE WET INGREDIENTS NEED TO BE SEPARATE,” I yelled as I dumped burnt to crisp cinnamon buns down the garbage shoot. They were like pieces of black coal that were steaming a very unpleasant smell. 

“I forgot!” Spencer yelled back, unsuccessfully cracking an egg. 

There were three more hours until opening happened and baking was not being done. Well, it was being done, just very poorly. Spencer asked to come over very early in the morning to help me bake, he had reassured me that he would be helpful but right now he’s not really living up to his promise. 

Two batches. That’s it, two good batches was all we got out of a dozen.  

“I thought baking was easier,” Spencer puffed, ditching the eggs and plopping down onto a stool. 

“It’s just math and science Spencer,” I laughed. 

“Well it’s complicated,” He pouted. 

“Oh, boo-hoo,” I mocked, rubbing my eyes, fake crying. 

-

May 21st:

Chloe got engaged! So her date went well I would assume. I’m so excited, the weddings going to be so amazing!

-

May 30th:

CHLOE ASKED ME TO BE HER MAID OF HONOUR!!!!!!! It’s party time bitchessssss. 

-

June 3rd:

“SURPRISE!” Was the first thing I heard walking in through the doors of the cafe. Looking around the whole cafe was decorated in streamers and balloons for my birthday. 

“You guys! You didn’t have to do this!” I exclaimed. 

“But we did!” Spencer said kissing my cheek. Taking my hand in his he spoke again, “Come meet the team.”

I immediately stiffened at the thought of meeting Spencer’s team. He most likely noticed this and gave my hand a small squeeze. “Don’t worry they’ll love you,” He reassured. 

“I’m counting you on that,” I whispered. 

-

July 25th: 

Chloe’s wedding is today! The day was perfect and sunny for a beach wedding, everyone who was invited to their wedding flew out to California for their beach wedding. The groom’s name was Ricky Polern and he was actually a pretty nice guy, funny, and respectful. 

I brought Spencer with me as a plus one to the wedding and Spencer gladly came with me. Although I had to push some buttons with his team to drag him with me. 

The wedding was spectacular and everyone had lots of fun, the food was great, and fortunately, there was no case to steal Spencer away from me. Spencer and I even had our first slow dance together. He looked so handsome in the dim light and he had told me I was the one he wanted to grow old with. I cried tears of joy. 

I caught the bouquet! 

-

August 7th: 

David Rossi invited me over to dinner to get to know me better, it was VERY scary at first but he ended up loving me. Chloe was also finally moved out, it was very sad but we promised to call everyday.

-

August 22nd: 

Spencer proposed! I think I might die of happiness. I will die of happiness. 

-

“Spencer, what are we doing out here on the roof so late at night?” I asked as Spencer dragged me onto the roof. 

“I have something to show you!” Spencer excitedly responded. 

Spencer had set up a table with red table cloth and vanilla-scented candles with perfectly placed table utensils. All of it seemed so cliche but it was adorable coming from Spencer. 

Spencer pulled out a seat for me to sit at and I chuckled and gave a little curtsy before sitting.  Pushing me in gently making sure he didn’t push me in too much he ran over to his side of the table and sat down too. “So do you like it?” He asked.

“Spencer this is great,” I answered.

Spencer’s smile widened and he looked as if he was a child again and he had just discovered he was going to DisneyLand.

Pulling out a very delicious looking strawberry cheesecake out of a picnic basket, Spencer set it down between us and said, “I have successfully backed a strawberry cheesecake for you Y/n just like how you baked one for me.”

“Spencer you didn’t have too! This is so amazing.” I exclaimed, examining the perfectly baked sweet. 

“It took me a few tries but I did it,” He admitted. 

“What matters is that you did this for me,” I said reassuringly with a warm smile tugging at my lips. 

“Hey could you cut the cake, I need to do something,” Spencer said, handing me a small cake knife before he disappeared out of my sight. 

“Spencer, this has great texture,” I explained cutting into the fluffy cheesecake. 

“Y/n turn around,” I heard Spencer say from behind. 

Not giving it much thought I did. What I saw surprised me completely. Spencer was on one knee and in his hands was a beautiful dark purple velvet box and in it sat a beautiful diamond ring. The ring had a thin silver band and a beautiful perfectly round diamond. 

“I know this is really early in our relationship Y/n, but it feels like I’ve known you for my whole life. You’re the one person that makes me happier than the books I read and you make me feel so special. Your kind, beautiful, smart and you love everyone you meet. That day you met my team they loved you so much Rossi told me to marry you and when you caught the bouquet I knew I had too. Y/n Y/ln will you marry me?” He proposed smiling up at me.

At that moment I fell in love with Spencer all over again, to have him say those things warmed my heart to the fullest. I felt tears in my eyes when I answered, “Yes! Yes! Yes! I would love to marry you!” I cried.

Spencer gently slipped the ring onto my finger and jumped up and brought me into a big hug. Without much thought I crushed my lips onto Spencer and wrapped my arms around the back of his neck. This kiss we shared was beyond special as our bodies pressed together and our lips moved in sync. 

“I love you so much,” I whispered, pulling away.

“I love you more,” Spencer said, reconnecting our lips. 

-

September 1st:

I asked Chloe to be my maid of honour! She said yes! 

-

September 16th: 

I met Spencer’s mother and she was the sweetest person alive, she and I started the planning for the wedding. 

-

September 30th:

Wedding dress shopping!! 

-

October 1st:

Spencer and I had the best time together decorating the cafe with Halloween decorations. It was his favourite holiday and he was definitely living up to the Halloween spirit.

-

October 28th:

It’s Spencer's birthday! The team called me up in secret and we planned a secret birthday party for Spencer. He admitted he figured out we had planned a party for him because he knew we were sneaking around, but he still loved it. Everyone had fun and very very drunk.

-

October 31st:

Spencer unfortunately couldn’t spend Halloween with me this year, he was away on a case. But he promised he would make up for it when he got back.

-

November 15th:

Spencer and I were finally getting married. The wedding was beautiful, nothing grand but it was spectacular. The dress I wore was beautiful but simple, it was sleek and fit me well hugging all my curves and was floor length. Spencer looked very handsome standing at the altar as I was walked by Rossi to him.

The wedding vows were said and both Spencer and I had no hesitation. When we kissed the whole crowd cheered for us. The night was magical the best I’ve ever had, we danced the night away and in the end we took a jet to Sydney Australia for our honeymoon. But not before Chloe took mass amounts of photos of Spencer and me and rubbed the fact that Spencer and I did get married in my face.

It was great. 

-

December 25th: 

Spencer and I had our first Christmas together, it was also the day I told him I was pregnant. He was very excited. We were ready for children.

-

Somewhere in the future:

We had twins, Amelia and Claira Reid! Spencer is the best father ever, he loves his girls so much and would do anything for them. 

We ended up moving in together in a small beautiful house in the same neighborhood as Rossi, who treated them like they were his own grandchildren. I retired from the cafe and became a full-time author writing horror novels. Cherry White and her best friend Rossa Lenney ended up caring on the legacy and I passed on the cafe to her and her best friend. 

As cliche as it sounds, Spencer and I had a happily ever after.