#neither good nor bad emotions it just wasted my time

[soupnoodle]

my friend who went to see the new master and margarita movie, not familiar with the book: what the fuck is going on

me, watching the new master and margarita movie, familiar with the book: what the fuck is going on

[ofallthingsnasty]

If your inbox is open could I please request a yandere sae where he traps his Darling by getting them pregnant and also this is around the time where he kidnaps them and they get Stockholm Syndrome if you're uncomfortable with this feel free to ignore my request

hey hey!! sure it's pretty much always open 🤗 thank you for giving my brain something to chew on - this really tickled me bc he isn't necessarily the first character i think of when i think yandere bllk! a cold one, for sure 🥶

tags: yandere, sae is 20+, emotional abuse, baby trapping (no pronouns used for reader but they can get pregnant), noncon mention, smidge of unreliable narrator word count: 0.6k

Sae is one thing: selfish. He knows you're here against your will and he simply doesn't care. He gets what he wants. You won't ever know why exactly he picked you out of all the possible people to obsess over because he won't ever treat you like one would a spouse. He's blunt, he's brash, he's an asshole - even to you. He doesn't keep you small on purpose, Sae is just like that. Unlike some others, he doesn't criticize you to snuff out your self-esteem, he truly thinks what he says. You'll learn how to play by his rules and admittedly - he is fair, at least as far as he is concerned. Neither cruel nor sadistic, he simply expects you to conform and be perfect for him. Deviate from his vision for you and he'll let you know- but as long as you are good for him you won't hear a single word.

He actually strikes me as one of the few from Blue Lock who would choose to kidnap you - it's easier and keeps you by his side. He's pragmatic like that. And because Sae doesn't need your love - he simply takes what he wants - he doesn't care for all that lovey-dovey shit, either. Watch him simply lock you away even though you have never talked to each other. He's convinced you're perfect for him and that's enough. He really wastes no time. In his opinion, your predicament isn't all too bad, even beneficial. Isn't this what so many people strive for? Marry rich, be pampered for the rest of your days, no more worries, no more hurt? Really, you should be over the moon to be the spouse of a famous soccer player. He'll tell you as much; that you should be grateful for the roof over your head, that you'll never have to work another day in your life because of him, that you'll have everything you'll ever want - and that being kept like this is the trade-off, that he expect payment from time to time. All your fighting, your scratching, your crying - it doesn't matter to him. It's annoying, sure, but it won't stop him at all. (Although even Sae has his limits. If you keep screaming at him how you don't care for the designer clothes, the expensive furniture and his stupid house, he isn't above showing you what you're taking for granted right now. Some nice, quaint nights in the basement with little food and water and no clothes should set your head straight. Not cruel. Just pragmatic.)

And because he takes such good care of you, he deserves something else in return, doesn't he? A baby is perfect. It's easy to realize that dream - he's expecting sex from you regularly, anyway and never really bothers with birth control. In the beginning, he humored you a little by using condoms (to soften the blow, so to speak) but by now he simply doesn't care anymore. The thought of you pregnant with his child excites him more than he'd like to admit. It isn't necessarily about keeping or trapping you - he just wants to start a little family with you. (And maybe, just maybe, he is actually a tiny bit in love with you, not just obsessed.) He won't tell you of his decision, he simply fucks you more often. But you're smart enough to catch on, with time - too bad you don't stand a chance against a pro athlete when he bends you over for the tenth time this week and tracks your periods, waiting for your fertile window. You can only grit your teeth and take it, terrified of the day he actually knocks you up.

And as always, he doesn't get why you're making such a fuss; you only have to be good for him. He'll take care of you and your child, you'll see.

[tomorrowxtogether]

In the name of youth! TXT dreams of tomorrow

TOMORROW X TOGETHER’s teasers that were released prior to dropping their new album entitled minisode 3: TOMORROW traces along the team’s past.

The first one, “TXT minisode 3: TOMORROW Concept Trailer Teaser” in which the members appear donning crowns is a nod to their debut song “CROWN”, while the photos and concept clips of the other three versions “Light”, “Ethereal”, and “Romantic” overlap with the many moments since their debut up till the present. “Light” in which the members look like young princes amid nature that they have all to themselves reminds us of the group’s early years, when they landed on the music scene as fresh, mysterious young boys up to their “Blue Hour” period. The members look like fallen angel-turn-rockers in “Ethereal” which reminds us of the rock number “0X1=LOVESONG (I Know I Love You) feat. Seori” where the members emulated young boys who got lost along the way. In “Romantic” the rose from the music video of “Good Boy Gone Bad,” which is a song about a boy’s overwhelming emotions over breaking up with his lover, makes another appearance except it has now withered and dried up. It’s indeed a “Deja Vu” much like the lead single off minisode 3: TOMORROW. The same events are repeated, but they’re not quite the same. TOMORROW X TOGETHER dance in the “minisode 3: TOMORROW Concept Trailer” just like they did in the “Blue Hour” music video. But instead of in a beautiful plain in “Blue Hour” they dance in a wasted forest with overpasses running through, trees strewn about. Things in the present have gone miserably wrong, unlike in the past. They are in the real world; the members jumped in willingly in the last album The Name Chapter: FREEFALL. Here, nobody believes that they were once young princes. 

“I’ve fun away countless times” in “Deja Vu” recalls the lyrics that asks us to run away with them in “Run Away,” that they want to run away in “CROWN,” and that they are running away in a gray car in “LO$ER=LO♡ER.” “Before our dusty crown” is reminiscent of “CROWN” and “A big crown on my, they aren’t hideous horns anymore,” and of the relationship between horns and a crown. “Deja Vu” is a culmination of TOMORROW X TOGETHER’s past. All of their pasts made TOMORROW X TOGETHER who they are here, in the real world. Just like in the opening of “CROWN,” there’s a Morse Code in the second track of the album that comes before “Deja Vu”: ‘- --- -- --- .-. .-. --- .—’. This signal that marked the team's appearance is still being sent out today. However, the signals in “Deja Vu” are “Morse Codes from the ruins” The boys have come to the present from the past, from fantasy to reality, but their present, right here is in ruins. The brutal reality of the present demolishes all the good times, just like the waves erode the sand. The beat and melody of “Deja Vu” continue, like Morse Codes sent from the past reaching us in the present. However, just like TOMORROW X TOGETHER’s past that is reflected in “Deja Vu”, the past that remains in their memories stops them from accepting reality just as it is. They want to keep believing that they were young princes, even if nobody would believe them. And reality is here to aggressively eliminate this wish. This is how they become overcome with an emotion that is neither just sadness nor rage. While “Deja Vu” is a mix of lazy trap and emo-rock, it is more of a combination of complex feelings than a simple mash up of genres. The slow buildup of pent-up emotions along with the beat erupts in the latter half of the second verse in an emo-rock sound with guitars and drums at the fore. It seems like we are severed from our past, but the past can also be the driver that awakens our emotions that have been suppressed by reality. It can create the miracle of tomorrow like in “Miracle,” the track that follows “Deja Vu.” The emotions that are repressed in “Deja Vu” climaxes in the second half of the second verse, then transforms into a bright explosive rock sound in “Miracle” - “tomorrow is visible when your eyes are closed.” We’re not sure if this miracle of tomorrow will ever come true. But like in the last track “Quarter Life,” save for the acoustic rendition of “Deja Vu,” “Deja Vu (Anemoia Remix),” they are in fact stumbling through a dark time, just “a quarter way into a long, long tunnel,” which is quite a far way from nine and three quarters. The adults say, “you only get these beautiful days of youth now,” failing to understand the younger generation, but the boys want to shout out “which way do we go”?! TOMORROW X TOGETHER’s past journey that has been compiled into minisode 3: TOMORROW flips the young people’s relationship with the past and the present, their dreams and reality. Adults in the real world say that young princes don’t exist, that we need to live in the real world. But minisode 3: TOMORROW tells us that all our dreams and love of the past is the way to a “tomorrow” that transcends reality. Young boys who are born in the age of hip hop meets rock to leap into tomorrow. 

Once you’ve listened to the whole album, go back to the first track “I'll See You There Tomorrow” and give it another listen. While you may not know which way to go and things may feel bleak, “Quarter Life” tells you to tells you to wander a little, work your way through it, then “I'll See You There Tomorrow” tells the young child who told me “see you again tomorrow” when “I wanted to run away,” and says “I believe that we are meant to be, it’s okay if you’re late, I will always wait for you tomorrow.”  In this moment, “I'll See You There Tomorrow” becomes the last moment when TOMORROW X TOGETHER passes through the dark reality and reaches “tomorrow” together, while showing us a glimpse into TOMORROW X TOGETHER’s future as the first track of the album. Reality is depressing, miserable. But future TOMORROW X TOGETHER invites themselves in the present, and the child that says “see you again tomorrow” to the beyond. The explosive voice from "Deja Vu” expresses the overwhelming emotion of tomorrow’s arrival without too much strain, accompanied by electronic sounds. 

TOMORROW X TOGETHER’s journey has been moving through the dreamy past and the present reality, and towards the future. minisode 3: TOMORROW encompasses the past, present and future all in one album to show us that the young boys are about to embark on a new journey. It seems like they have made it through a quarter of their lives in reality, but in the far future, they may be completely different luminous people. Like the message of the fourth concept trailer “Promise,” reaching what is “beyond” together is all a part of the youthful days shared by TOMORROW X TOGETHER’s generation. 

[galakaz]

Time killing time spoilers (aka i talk about my thoughts on the event)

Oh we eating excellent today. The mostly comedic tone i feel was a good thing to have after what happened in canto 6 (ishmael getting karma, the outfits, mei, going for that A.S.S, ace detective rodion). Before the event came out i know people were debating on why vergilus picked that team either for their skills or because it reminded him of his old crew which could still be the case but its comedic to me that the reason mersault didn't join is because he didn't volunteer also this yi sang moment

ya like to see your boy happy We get reminded that the city is indeed a bad place. and we finally get some more characterization for rodion cause by god she needed it her canto was not long enough and it was exelent, the the facade is now painfully obvious if you didn't see it before and she still has her doubts of being useless and not special especially after seeing sonya's effects in the world.

the time killer themselves rocking up in a clean suit body and quite an interesting antagonist built around the concept of wasting time and the guilt from that, carmen did a good job that day clean workmanship (still fuck you carmen). Hubert turning out to be who we really are and planning to stop time to achieve his goal is 100% gonna bite us in the ass especially when LIMBUS IS SELLING HIM THE FUCKING CORUPTION PILLER LIKE

IM WITH YOU VERGILIUS WHY IN GODS NAME IS THIS COMPANY SELLING THE BLOODY PILLARS THATS NOT LIKE SOME RANDOM WEAPON THAT THING LITERALLY CAUSES DISTORTIONS THAT IS FUCKING DANGEROUS THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS COMPANY. ALSO DAMNED CONTRACT STOPPING THEM FROM ACTING ON THAT. (but we did get vergilius content from this and by god i am dining on that shit like i havent eaten in 3 days) anyway

Hong lu thats not just something you can casually bring up. but it did help with understanding ones feelings to try and cheer rodion up (hong lu is gonna be quite interesting when we get to his canto with his emotional intelligence)

I just wanted to yap about my thoughts

(the pic is there to separate this)

Oh yeah and its funny how outis realised she aint all that when neither dante nor vergilius didn't pick her (and it 100% effected her)

[pink-sparkly-witch]

The Widow - Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Summary: Sam and Y/N are happily married, but everything changes after a fatal car accident leaves her a widow. The Winchester motto: "Family Don't End with Blood," takes on a whole new meaning for Y/N as she navigates her new normal with the help of her brother-in-law, Dean. But what no one can tell her, is what happens when she falls in love again?   

Pairing: Sam Winchester x F!Reader (past) | Dean Winchester x F!Reader (eventual)

Warnings: grief, angst, fluff

Words: 2,450

A/N: I am so sorry for making so many of you cry or get emotional from the last chapter. Although I made myself cry writing it, but I never thought it would have the same impact on the readers *hugs*. This one shouldn’t be so bad 🫣💖

You can catch up here!

My Masterlist     AO3    Ko-Fi

One Month Later

Grief is a funny thing; on the good days, you can function like a normal adult by eating and sleeping quite well. But on the bad days, you stay on the sofa just staring at the wall, wearing pyjamas that – like your hair – haven’t been washed in days, and you can’t remember the last time you ate because everything tastes like ash.

Today though, is a good day. You’ve eaten, showered, done the laundry, and now you’re washing the dishes from the lunch you had with John and Dean. One of those things on its own is a huge achievement, and the fact you did them all feels like it should be worth celebrating, but your sense of accomplishment is whipped away just as quickly as it had appeared.

“Have you thought any more about clearing out Sam’s things?” John speaks softly and carefully, like he’s dealing with a caged animal. But when he’s met with silence from you, he lets out a sigh. “Darlin’, it’s not healthy staying cooped up in the house all day surrounded by his things.”

“Dad…” Dean attempts to shut down the conversation.

“Look,” John continues, ignoring his eldest son’s plea. “I know you’re hurting, believe me, I do. And honestly, it’s gonna be like that for a long time. Maybe even always. I’m just trying to make it easier for you. All these things you’re doing,” John gestures around the open-plan living area of the home you shared with your late husband, “aren’t healthy.”

You don’t need this right now. This is a good day. So, you do what you always do when John brings it up; you walk away.

Dropping the plate back into the soapy water, you quickly dry your hands, pick up the basket filled with clean laundry from the kitchen table, and walk away. You know it’s childish, but his argument is one you don’t want to hear because you know he’s right. You know seeing Sam’s things everywhere doesn’t help. You know wearing clothes that still hold a little bit of his scent will only prolong your grief. And you know that calling his number to hear his voicemail message several times a day isn’t healthy. You’re just not ready to let go yet. And that’s something neither he nor Jody seems to understand.

“Dad, you need to drop this. She’s grieving,” you hear Dean say as you step into the hallway. “Do you want to push her away? Because that’s what’s gonna happen if you don’t leave her be!”

“I’m only trying to help, son,” John sounds defeated, and you pause to listen to what else they have to say about you. “She’s a good girl, Dean, and she’s choosing to waste away by locking herself in this damn house day after day!”

“Sam only died last month! Her husband has only been dead for six weeks,” Dean yells. “He’s barely cold in the ground, just let her grieve!” 

You smile softly at the way Dean always has your back. That’s why the days he comes to check in on you are your favourite. He listens and understands you – or at the very least, pretends to. He gets why you’re still holding on. He gets that it’s not as easy as putting your big girl panties on and getting back on the horse. You lost your husband. The love of your life. You don’t just get up, dust yourself off and walk away from that. And Dean seems to be the only one who understands, which surprises you because John lost Mary when he was around your age and you thought that might make him understand what you’re going through a little more.

You hear John sigh, and from the scratching sound, run his hand over his stubbled face. “I just hate seeing her hurting. In all the time I’ve known her, I’ve never seen her do anything other than smile, and now, I never see that smile. Some days, like today, that hurts more than the loss of my son.”

“I know, dad. I miss her smile too, but she’s going through a process, and she’ll take her own time to do it. What she needs is for us to be supportive and stop pushing her to move on before she’s ready.”

You smile again, grateful beyond words that Dean gets it. Gets you. He’s always been good at reading people and emotions. He knows you better than you know yourself. Better sometimes, than even Sam did.

You’ve heard enough and make your way upstairs to put the laundry away, taking the time to stop, breathe, and reset because today is a good day.

Deciding you’ve hidden away upstairs long enough, you make your way back down to your guests, but stop short when you see John standing at the bottom of the stairs.

“I gotta get going, darlin’. I’m sorry if I upset you, it wasn’t my intention. I’m worried about you and trying to help.” he steps towards you and places a kiss on your forehead.

“I know,” you smile softly. “And I appreciate it… Sometimes.” You smirk, and John chuckles.

“I’ll see you in a few days, alright? I’ve been putting this hunting trip with Bobby off for a couple of weeks and I’ve run out of excuses!” he chuckles again.

“It’ll do you good to get away. You work too hard, and you’ve been taking care of me too, you deserve a break.” John’s been getting the family business ready for Dean to take over for the past few weeks, and you have the suspicion he isn’t quite as ready for retirement from Winchester Auto Repair as he says he is.

“Alright, I’m going. Dean, take care of our girl. Y/N, take care of Dean,” he jokes, and you let out a bleat of laughter, the sound now so foreign to the men in your hallway that they grin like little kids on Christmas morning. With a hug and another kiss on your forehead, John heads out.

“I’m sorry about dad, sweetheart. When mom passed, he didn’t have a choice and had to keep going because of me and Sammy, you know? I think he thinks everyone should be able to do the same.”

“I get it, I really do. But I don’t have anything to fight for, and I feel like I’m barely treading water most days,” you chuckle sadly. “Jody says the same kinda things, you know?” You glance up at Dean and see he’s got his whole attention on you.

“Her latest is: ‘Honey, when are you gonna stop wearing his clothes? Surrounding yourself in his scent constantly is tricking your brain into thinking he’s coming home…’” You mimic Jody’s voice perfectly, albeit a little whinier than she really is, causing Dean to chuckle. “I know she’s right… and so is your dad, just don’t tell them I said that!” you point at Dean in warning, and he holds up his hands.

“Your secrets are safe with me, sweetheart. No one needs John Winchester knowing he’s right about anything,” Dean chuckles before asking the question you know is coming. “So, if you know they’re right, what’s holding you back?”

“Because some days it comforts me. Wearing his clothes, smelling him, seeing his stuff exactly where he left it, makes me feel like he’s still here. Like literally here, watching me,” you sweep your arms around you, “and that makes me feel safe and comforted and loved. And I’m not ready to give that up yet.”

“You said some days,” Dean brings up. And of course, he picks up on that.

“What?” You ask, in a bid to delay the inevitable.

“You said, ‘some days it comforts me’. Are there days it doesn’t?” 

“Me wearing his clothes, leaving his stuff around… it’s my choice. But sometimes I catch his scent when I’m not expecting it or find something in a drawer, and it hits me so hard, and I feel like I’m drowning in anger and grief and I–” your voice catches and you stop to take a deep, shaky breath. “Those are the days that kill me. The days I don’t move from the couch or even get out of bed. It’s like if I do these things – even though I know it’s not healthy – it feels better when it’s a choice I have and not forced on me.”

“So, it’s about controlling your grief?” Dean questions and it makes you stand a little straighter and give him your full attention. “They say the last stage of grief is acceptance, right?” He looks at you with a raised brow and you nod your head. “Sweetheart, I think you’re almost there, standing right at the line, but you’re not ready to cross it.”

“What are you, my therapist?” Your attempt at joking falls flat because you know he’s hitting the nail on the head.

“Hey, I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with it. I’m just trying to understand where you’re at and what’s stopping you from getting to the other side.” He stares at you intensely, and you can feel the heat rise from your neck. “Come on, sweetheart, help me out here. I just wanna figure out what’s going on in that pretty head of yours to see if I can help.”

“What if crossing that line means I’m forgetting him?” You mumble meekly.

“Y/N/N–” Dean starts but you cut him off, realising the need to say it out loud.

“If I clear out Sam’s things, get rid of all his clothes, put the photographs away, I’m removing every trace of him from this house. Our house. What if by doing that, and without seeing those reminders of him every day, it makes me forget him?”

“That’s never gonna happen, Y/N. Your relationship with Sam, your love for him and his for you, will always be a part of you,” Dean takes your hand and pulls you with him to the sofa and sits you down. Rather than take the seat next to you, he sits on the coffee table facing you. “I can tell by the look on your face you don’t believe me, so let me ask you a question.”

“Okay.” You’re dubious but agree anyway.

“Who was your first love? And I don’t mean Sam,” Dean states before you can try that argument. “I mean your first, first love. I’m talking like middle school and the first guy you thought you couldn’t live without.”

“Billy Richie.” It comes out of your mouth before your brain fully registers his question.

“What was Billy like?” Dean smirks, and you grin back at him, understanding where he’s going with this.

“He had blond hair, blue eyes, and a really cute smile. Oh! And he wore a leather jacket all the time, whatever the weather,” you giggled. “He sat next to me in Math class, he was always chewing gum and would wink at me every time he sat down.”

“Oh, Billy was a bit of a bad boy, huh?” Dean chuckles.

“Nah, he was a big teddy bear. He just looked the part.” You smile at the memories Billy Richie is stirring up. “He was my date to prom, and my first kiss.”

“And with that smile on your face, sweetheart, I’d say you remember him just as well now as you did fifteen years ago,” Dean holds your gaze, even gently pulling your chin towards him when you try to look away. “My point is that if you can remember bad boy Billy Richie so clearly after fifteen years, you’re gonna remember Sam even clearer in fifteen years because he was your husband.” Dean leans forward, placing a kiss on your forehead.

“I get that you’re not ready to take that final step, and trust me, I have your back against anyone who tries to push you over that hurdle before you’re ready to make the jump. And when you do jump, I’ll be right here with you.” Dean smiles softly as he takes your hands in his. “But I do want you to think about doing one thing for me,” Dean’s voice is kind and gentle, and you know whatever he’s going to say to you is a suggestion rather than an order.

“I would really like you to think about going back to work. Seeing people, getting out of the house and having a distraction for a few hours a day will do you the world of good, sweetheart.” 

Dean stares at you with such intensity and all you can see is how much he cares about you. It’s clear that he thinks this is the best thing for you, and the more you think about it, the more you agree with him.

“You know what? I’ll think on it a little more, but I think you might be right,” your answer is not what Dean expects by the way he looks like he’s just won the lottery.

“Awesome,” Dean declares. “Now we’ve got that out of the way, The Lost Boys is on tonight. Wanna order pizza and watch it?” He grins at you, and you can’t help but smile at how boyish he looks when he does that.

“Dean, it’s Friday. Don’t cancel your plans with whichever girl is your flavour of the week to spend the night in with me,” you tease.

“I, uhm,” he rubs his hand over the back of his neck, “haven’t had those kinda plans since the night Sammy…” he doesn’t finish his sentence. He doesn’t need to. “Even if I did,” he continues, “One: you are much more important than some girl in a bar, and two: I’d much rather spend the night watching movies with you.”

“Dean–”

“I mean it,” he insists. “You’re not a burden or an inconvenience – I know that’s what’s running through your head, don’t even try to argue with me! So, are we watching this damn movie together or are you gonna make me go home and watch it by myself? All alone. On a Friday night.” Dean’s feigned grumpiness makes you laugh.

“Fine! I’ll order the pizza! But I don’t have any beer, so if you want some, you’ll have to go to the store.”

“On it!” Dean stands and leans over to press another kiss on your forehead, something that was second nature to all the Winchester men where you’re concerned, but you aren’t going to complain about the sweet gesture. “You need anything else?” he asks as he picks up his car keys.

“No, all good. Just… please promise me you’ll drive safe,” you beg, worrying at your bottom lip.

“Always, sweetheart. I promise.”

Next Chapter>>

@deans-spinster-witch @muchamusedaboutnothing @kazsrm67 @twinkleinadiamondsky @waters-2567 @leigh70 @waynes-multiverse @jesllianaquilesrolonsworld @chriszgirl92 @stoneyggirl2 @marilynnlew @ilovedean-spn2

[einsatzzz]

[OC] Ninomiya Kanako (Kana) - Character Profile

🍎The cold but resolute asocial who's obsessed with her Family! Ninomiya Kanako!🍎

You can go to this link to our Oniyanagi Wiki site for her full character page!

"Kurumi is my twin, so do treat her well. That's neither a request nor a suggestion."

Kana is one of the two 10th generation bosses of the Oniyanagi yakuza family (alongside Kurumi). She is a talented assassin who's fortunately currently under a temporary restriction, so you're totally safe as long as you don't get in her way.

Age: 15 Birthday: December 13 Zodiac Sign: ♐︎Sagittarius Height: 157cm Weight: 46.5kg Gender: ? Country of origin: Japan MBTI: ISFJ Favorite author: Osamu Dazai Favorite food: "Anything sweet will do", Kurumi's cooking

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PERSONALITY: As if she's in a perpetual game of poker, she keeps her cards close to her chest with an unreadable expression.

Kana has a stoic demeanor and her expressions are often devoid of any emotion (even in the face of life-threatening situations). When she does show it, it usually means bad things (not for her). She is also a natural liar and can be very manipulative.

She's an old soul who doesn't like wasting time on things that don't matter. She doesn't have any special interests and also doesn't derive any pleasure or regret from her talent, or so what she says. When in truth, she has a large amount of hidden bloodlust that she has trained to keep under control - for her Family's peace of mind.

One of the very few exceptions that stands out from this dull and empty existence is her love for her twin. Kurumi's safety is also your safety.

SPECIALTY: If it's for her Family, there is nothing she won't cut down.

Kana is a swordsman but she also has a special talent for assassination. She can somehow use any item into a murder weapon, no matter if it's a pencil, a soda can, a piece of twig or even a toilet paper. It's also easy for her to hide her presence because her footsteps has no sound (even when she's running in the rain). Out of habit, she sleeps with her eyes open and it creeps a lot of people out.

DAILY LIFE: Despite certain difficulties, she wants the people that she cherishes to live freely and be true to themselves.

Her Family members are quite the pieces of work - a very lonely, miserable and dishonest bunch looking for a place to belong in this fleeting world. And she is also the same as them. Caring for this Family (in her own way) is a responsibility she took on for herself. She promised, after all. So they should just do whatever their heart desires. Because she's not able to do so for herself anymore.

—Within reason, of course. If Yui were to start causing construction work level noise while working on his robot projects at ungodly hours, she won't hesitate to punch a hole through the wall and tell him to keep it down. If some asshole scum of the earth is trying to court Kurumi? Unacceptable. Fortunately, accidental deaths are a common occurrence.

RELATIONSHIPS: A new school doesn't change anything for her...supposedly.

Reborn: No comment.

Tsuna & Lambo: Don't get ahead of yourselves just because Kurumi is fond of you.

Gokudera: His sister's cooking isn't that bad. Skill issue.

Yamamoto: He's a good kid.

Hibari: This bastard's gonna have to graduate from middle school at some point, right?

Dr. Shamal: There are people in this world who deserve to die. But fellow weeds don't die so easily, don't they?

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Thank you for taking the time to read this! This character...is kindaaaa complicated, so I have a bit of a difficulty coming up with words for her profile. This character can pack so much spoilers lmao. Anyway, I did my best (lol).

Any questions about her or the story is very much appreciated! For credits, all Oniyanagi OCs are by me and @amiahoshi! While for the intro audio, Kana is voiced by erushaVA and I also got the background music here from MusMus! The audio art used above is inspired from En/kidu's April Fools art lmao:

"Kana outright doesn't care and doesn't think about gender or pronouns."

The next one will be Yui's, but that will be for late-July/early-August since I'll be too busy studying in the coming weeks. I think I'll start on the webcomic once I'm done with Yui's ref sheet.

[thewadapan]

Launch codes to nuke "73 Yards" from orbit - Doctor Who review

CW: discussion of rape

So I've been watching a lot of Moffat Doctor Who lately, which is broadly dogshit, but each new episode of Russel T. Davies' return to the show's helm is really pushing the boundaries of what it means to create bad television. I actually would believe that this is part of a grand plan to destroy the BBC from the inside, by blowing millions of pounds on a singularly dreadful Disney+ show, but RTD's original run on Doctor Who was also much worse than people are typically willing to acknowledge, so this is obviously nonsense.

"73 Yards" has apparently proven very divisive, with some people lauding it as one of the best Doctor Who episodes in ages (this means nothing to me, I didn't watch any of Chibnall's stuff), and some people taking a CinemaSins-esque "look at all these plot holes!!!" approach to criticising it. This essay definitely resembles the latter, but I want to clarify right away that I don't care about plot holes in and of themselves. If a story coheres on a metaphorical level, I can overlook nonsense plotting. Any given Doctor Who episode, including many of my favourites, will have at least a few major plot holes. It's like swiss cheese, the holes are the hole point!

The thing is, this episode is like a block of swiss cheese which is all holes. As in, there's no cheese there, just an empty plate. It neither furthers the overarching plot of the series, nor reveals anything substantive about the characters. If you watch Doctor Who for the vibes, you can perhaps get something out of the spooky images and buy into the intended emotional content of each scene. That has unironically always been the best way to watch Doctor Who and enjoy it without becoming incandescent with a kind of impotent, essay-provoking fury—so genuinely, good for you if you're able to do that. I just kind of think that it's possible for television to be good, so.

The episode is titled "73 Yards" for the distance our companion du jour, Ruby Sunday, finds herself at all times in this episode from a strange indistinct cognitohazardous woman, who follows her at a "semperdistance" (a word coined by the episode in an excruciating scene where an old lady goes, "well, I don't think there's a word in the English language like that, so to coin one from Latin, it would probably be 'semper distant', meaning 'always distant'"). I knew immediately what this title referred to the moment the woman appeared—great, I roll my eyes, at some point Ruby is going to walk past a really big ruler, and she'll go oh my word, why that woman, she's exactly 73 yards away from me!

At the start of the episode, the Doctor and Ruby step out of the TARDIS and—after a very conspicuous bit of exposition about a dangerous future Prime Minister from Wales—they almost immediately accidentally break a magic circle. Doctor Who has always struggled with one dissonant bit of narrative convenience, which is that no matter where the TARDIS goes, there's always some horrible ghastly supernatural alien shit going on. While writers have attempted to justify this in-universe, really it's just the anthropic principle of the show's narrative: if the TARDIS were to arrive in a normal boring inoccuous place, why would we watch that episode? We have to take it for granted that they're going to stumble onto something—and RTD increasingly seems disinterested in wasting time explaining the contrivance each episode—so in this case, it's that a magic circle happens to be right there underfoot and they step on it. Call it a "coincidence", fine, I gather that's what the series mytharc is about this time around. Now, later in the episode, the story seems to want to strongly suggest that the curse is a consequence of Ruby's actions—she has disrespected the magic—but as originally presented, it seems more like she's completely oblivious to the presence of the magic until it's too late. Ruby doesn't actually exert any agency in this introduction, nor in most of the episode, so the breaking of the circle fails to reveal anything about her character. By the same metric, I think most ordinary people would behave pretty much the same way, so this really tells us nothing about who Ruby is.

At this point, the Doctor disappears because of magic. The TARDIS remains, but without the Doctor, is inaccessible to Ruby. In just the preceding episode, "Boom", one of the many scenes in its already-bloated denouement saw Ruby being given a TARDIS key, which she tries in this episode, and it doesn't work, showing the viewer that this is spooky magic bullshit. I think this is bad showrunning, because the ending of "Boom" seriously needed trimming, so why bother if it only creates the narrative busywork of needing to show "and the key doesn't work" in this one? Why not have the Doctor give her the key after an episode with a beat similar to this, where Ruby needs to get into the TARDIS but can't, and he wants to stop it from ever happening again: "don't worry, the TARDIS doors will always open for you from now on!" As written, it strikes me as very clumsy plotting.

Ruby walks down the cliffside and encounters a hiker, who is actually the mysterious old lady who's recurred in every episode of this series in seemingly unrelated circumstances. This mytharc structure is the only kind I have ever seen RTD even attempt; Moffat rarely does better, but at least on occasion will take a token stab at tying the mytharc easter-egg into the themes of his series or individual episodes. (The crack is really, really good for this.) This time, Ruby recognises the woman on some level, to clue an inattentive audience into the fact that "ah, I guess this character was in the previous episodes, and maybe I was supposed to notice, because that might be relevant in some future episode!" No threat of it being relevant this episode, of course. Anyway, this hiker makes a bit of fuss about how Ruby's not dressed for the weather. I don't recall if the episode intends to suggest that the weather has suddenly turned evil after the circle was broken, or if Ruby and the Doctor arrived on a windswept cliff by accident, or if Ruby really is just ill-prepared—none of this is interesting.

Poor Millie Gibson has been given nothing but terrible material this episode, but where better actors have managed to salvage this kind of fare in prior episodes, she's not really up to the task here. Apparently this was the first episode she filmed for the show, which is a baffling decision—how is she supposed to establish the character without any series regulars to bounce off of? Why would you lead with an episode that's very pointedly building off a relationship developed over the course of the rest of the show? Regardless, between the script and Gibson's performance, not a single interaction where she talks about her stalkerly apparition to another person is remotely plausible as a way any real person would actually behave in this situation. I'm not even sure she tries to approach the follower at any point? She clearly tries to communicate with it, but it refuses to acknowledge her. This is Ruby's fifth adventure with(out) the Doctor, it should by this point be obvious that the woman is supernatural, dangerous, and related to the magic circle in some way: but the episode at this point seems to suggest this hasn't really occurred to her yet. Or, perhaps, that it has occurred to her, and she just thinks the hiker wouldn't believe her—but then if she does already think this is spooky magic, why does she throw the hiker under the bus by asking her to go talk to the entity? The entity ignores the hiker, and then lo and behold, the hiker is suddenly subjected to some kind of supernatural effect that causes her to flee screaming. How unexpected!

Oh well. Ruby continues to the village and goes into a pub, commencing the worst scene in the episode by a significant margin. In terms of set design, this pub is the kind of sterile nondescript establishment The World's End mercilessly lampooned, but I don't get the impression this was the intended effect. A half-dozen stereotypes inhabit the bar, all seeming to know each other, all dropping their individual interactions to singularly focus on Ruby from the moment she arrives. Again, they make fun of her for not having a coat. Ruby politely asks the innkeeper if they have any rooms going, and the innkeeper names a price. Ruby has no cash on her, so she asks if she can pay with her phone. Incomprehensibly, the innkeeper feigns ignorance of the entire concept. The idea here is that the episode is trying to trick you into thinking they've actually arrived in the early 2000s, before contactless payments were a thing. Ruby tries to rephrase the request, and the innkeeper remains committed to the bit. Finally, Ruby tries to explain that it's to do with online banking, and—this apparently being the desired reaction—the innkeeper at last reveals, ahah, it was all a ruse! Of course I have a contactless card machine. Everyone in the bar laughs at Ruby's supposed prejudice, and the innkeeper is implied to overcharge her £5 for a glass of Coke.

Look, I've been to pubs like this, and if the bartender tried to pull this shit on me, if everyone else in the room made it obvious they didn't want me there, I'd walk out and find another pub. And there'd be one, because I refuse to believe there's a single coastal village in this country with just a single pub, and if I told the people there what had just happened to me, they'd almost certainly be like—what the fuck? Or maybe, oh yeah, we know those guys, they're notorious freaks in the local area and everyone hates them. I'm sorry, who the fuck in any service job would pull something as mean-spirited like this? Like of course I could see it, if we're talking about an absolute scumbag customer, someone who walks in and spits on the counter and orders you to wipe it up. But I just don't think the scene as written remotely sells the impression that Ruby is behaving in a way that could possibly be construed as offensive towards anyone. Instead—and I realise why this isn't the case, but—it kind of does just create the impression that they're the ones prejudiced against this clearly-lost English girl?

And the episode isn't even done. Next, another old lady at the bar reacts to Ruby's fear of the magic circle by pretending to believe in the supernatural, rattling off a bunch of local folklore (which, in the wider context of the episode, turns out to be entirely true). At the mention of "fairy circle", a young girl laughs and points at her goth friend, saying "you can ask him about that!" to implicitly call him a homophobic slur. Everyone in the bar seems onboard with this old lady's yarn, and when there's a loud knock on the door, they all react with seemingly genuine terror. FUCK! It's Mad Jack, here to kill us all! The goth says something like, "He'll kill me first! You know why that is, don't you?" No, go on, Russel, why is that? Because he's gay, and he thinks that Mad Jack is homophobic?

Finally, the big surprise: this person outside, banging repeatedly on the unlocked pub door, is actually just a guy carrying a big tray of Cornish pasties. To a small Welsh pub. With like four customers in. In the late evening. And instead of, like, just barging in with the tray, or even setting down the tray to poke his head in and ask for some help, the guy has apparently loudly knocked multiple times while carrying this tray in both hands for some customer or member of staff to invite him in. What is he, fucking Dracula? Anyway, big laugh from everyone in the pub. Can you believe this Ruby girl thought that we believe in witchcraft! What a stupid twit! The old lady calls her a racist to her face. I can't believe what I'm watching. RTD is Welsh, of course, and I'm English, so maybe through some lens of demographic essentialism I have to assume that he is simply expressing something here which I can never understand, because racism is something which transcends my understanding, it transcends race, it's really just to do with when there's a foreigner. Isn't this all so very miserably misanthropic? Doesn't it just want to make you blow your brains out?

But fine, whatever, I can accept this stupid caricature land that we've suddenly been deposited into. Hey, maybe it's part of the mytharc, maybe breaking the magic circle has sideways transported us into a dimension where everyone is a prick. Genuinely, the allegory for this episode is meant to be something along these lines, but practically every other scene in the episode has people behaving perfectly kindly towards Ruby right up until the exact moment they directly confront the entity, so clearly this isn't even an attempt at interesting metatextual bullshit, this is just these people behaving according to their supposed nature. Taking all that for granted, we can imagine that perhaps the little arc for this sequence will be that Ruby makes peace with the Welsh, is meaningfully enlightened in some way about her own internalised bigotry, or whatever, and they finally warm to her.

Pff, so we can imagine! No, we cut to a day or two later, and the innkeeper insists with real venom that Ruby is forbidden from staying in the pub any longer, because one of the other regulars (scared by the following lady) refuses to return so long as Ruby is there. She takes a train back to London and we never see any of these characters again. Oh my fucking lord.

The next two sections are just recapitulations of the supernatural conceit. Arriving back at home, there's a lengthy scene where Ruby listens to her mum make misandrist remarks about how the Doctor, like any man, probably just wanted to lock himself in his shed, nevermind that the Doctor was literally just a woman, nevermind that the Doctor is totally nonbinary now for real in a way which will matter to the narrative and mean something. For some fucking reason, Ruby decides it'll be a good idea to experiment on the supernatural old lady who appears to strike mortal terror into anyone she talks to with her own fucking adoptive mum who she loves more than anything. The old lady strikes mortal terror into the mum, who flees from Ruby and kicks her out of the house. Next, Ruby meets up with Kate Lethbridge-Stewart, a character who for me is roughly equivalent to a walking textbox which spans the screen with a helpful disclaimer reading "THIS EPISODE OF DOCTOR WHO IS CURRENTLY PISS DRECK," so it's obvious to anyone watching that the episode is piss dreck. Kate, supposedly the most competent member of Britain's best government agency, idiotically sends a whole taskforce to intercept the cognitohazardous entity while remaining in contact to facilitate the spread of any cognitohazards. Hasn't she read There Is No Antimemetics Division? Steven Moffat certainly hasn't, at least according to his lawyers, but at least he seems capable of thinking about his fictional thought-hazards for more than two minutes to work out how characters might try to act around them. Where this kind of conceptual bullshit is usually a hallmark of one of Moffat's better episodes, for RTD it's definitely an indicator that shit's going to get very stupid. Kate Lethbridge-Stewart decides she wants nothing to do with Ruby. In a slightly better version of this episode, the soldiers literally holding guns would physically open fire on Ruby, forcing her to flee.

That's one of the things about Doctor Who which has always consistently floored me: even in earlier series where they're clearly straining against the budget, the show is constantly failing to thoughtfully devote its budget towards anything narratively compelling—speaking both on the micro-level here, within each individual episode, and in a more general sense of "why do they keep giving these hacks so much fucking money". It also floors me how, despite clearly having Disney bucks behind it, the show somehow looks worse than ever, desaturated to shit with flat lighting and sterile compositions. Despite being a present-day Britain episode—or perhaps because of that—the budget for this episode oozes off it, with countless sets polished to a mirror-sheen, tons of costume work for Ruby, a whole military taskforce. But woe betide we edit some stock muzzle flashes onto these guns in Adobe After Effects! Wouldn't want this episode getting too exciting, now would we?! I can see how this episode is attempting to say something about fear and alienation—basic themes which Doctor Who has explored countless times before in significantly better episodes, and even mid episodes by RTD like "Midnight" (see, it's even in the title)—but with that being the case, if you're going to do a whole thing about nukes anyway, why not just show the government just fucking shooting at the poor girl? Is that image too politically-charged for the BBC? No, actually, tell me, why exactly would the BBC object to such an image?

Ruby retreats oop Norf and we enter a montage intended to make it obvious to everyone watching that yes, Ruby is not going to be stuck here without the Doctor for hours, or days, but rather for years. In the same breath, of course, it immediately makes it obvious that nothing which happens in this episode will ever stick or matter in any in-universe sense, because it'll all be reset in some way, so the best we can hope for is that the events of the episode will teach us something about who Ruby is as a person. (In the formulaically-similar Rick & Morty, a consistently better-written and more thoughtful show than Doctor Who—stop booing me, I'm right, I'm not even going out to bat for Rick & Morty it's just that Doctor Who is usually rubbish—plotlines like this happen roughly once a season and will always, always stick... or if they don't, the fact that they don't will crush you somehow.) RTD's wondrous imagination fails to conjure a single idea of what Ruby does as a person in this time. She is depicted dating a series of interchangable men who are not the Doctor, being distracted by the apparition unceasingly signing at her from the corner of her eye. Finally, she catches a news report about a Welsh politician called "Mad Jack"—the name of the fae entity supposedly contained by the magic circle—which she takes as a sign that the plot is finally being allowed to begin.

She joins Mad Jack's campaign team and he immediately makes it clear that he is a slimeball who hates foreigners and really really wants to just fucking nuke everyone. Of course, Mad Jack isn't running for an actual real-world political party, he's running for some fake political party which has no realistic views whatsoever, even if yes I'm sure there's a lot of foreigners the Tories really would like to nuke if they thought they could get away with it. There's an incomprehensibly unconvincing news segment where Mad Jack delivers implausible rhetoric about phone apps and the cost of living, in 2046, which is so close to making some kind of meaningful satirical point that I'm going to scream. When Mad Jack speaks to Ruby for the first time, she practically sics him on this other woman in the campaign team. Again, the episode fails to commit to explicitly saying what it is that Mad Jack does to this woman, but it's probably that he rapes her. Later, the other woman vaguely tells Ruby that Mad Jack is definitely "a monster". Towards the end of this sequence, one of the male campaign members later suggests that Mad Jack is going to be hosting a "wild" party and that he's invited this specific woman by name, implying that he's planning on raping her again. Shortly after, that guy explains how Mad Jack is finally going to be getting the nuclear launch codes for real, and for some reason this is what makes Ruby go, oh fucking shit, it's go time babey! She gives a heartfelt apology to the other woman for not intervening against her presumably-rapist sooner. Then she walks out into the middle of the venue to stand exactly 73 yards away from Mad Jack, and finally he notices the old woman. The old woman strikes mortal terror into him and he resigns immediately, averting the bad future the Doctor recounted at the very start of the episode. Again, all of these characters basically disappear from the episode at this point.

I cannot stress enough how much I hate everything about the implied rape stuff here. After it happens, Ruby appears to be made aware of it, appears to already have a plan to send this guy to the shadow realm—and yet she does nothing! The narrative ultimately presented is that she chooses to overlook this for the greater good, to prevent a miscarriage of justice, because she has to be sure the guy is a horrible nuclear rapist. And the thing that really gets me, what really blows my mind, is that the way she plans on dealing with Mad Jack doesn't kill him, it doesn't send him to jail or anything, all it does is end his political career. Dude is fucking fine! She knows he'd be fine, because she's seen this before with dozens of other people by this point, with her own mum. And hell, she literally has foreknowledge that the guy will become the most dangerous Prime Minister ever. So why doesn't she just pull the trigger right away? Why couldn't she just have a modicum of female solidarity with this other complete non-character victim? Assuming I'm not completely insane, it's staggering to me how closely Ruby's behaviour mirrors the real-world narratives that get trotted out whenever some public figure is involved in a sexual assault scandal. It deeply depresses me that our protagonist, supposedly at forty, would make these choices.

Anyway, Ruby grows old, and finally they switch out her laughably-youthful forty-year-old makeup for an elderly actress. She revisits the TARDIS, which is now effectively a grave for this alien she went on four adventures with sixty years ago, and says some nondescript words. Then she's seen dying in a future care facility, and in what's maybe intended to be an ironic beat, a young nurse assumes that she doesn't know how voice-operated lights work. Ruby protests because obviously we had Alexa or whatever in 2024. The nurse leaves, and in what's definitely meant to be the big emotional climax of the episode, the old Ruby expresses feeling as if everyone in her life has always abandoned her, but that she nonetheless has constant company in the form of this inexplicable old lady ghost. In a genuinely spooky moment, the lights flicker on and off, and we see the old lady—now facing away from Ruby—slowly approaching her, like a Weeping Angel, until Ruby reaches out her hands...

...and finds herself back on that cliff in Wales. Except this time, she's looking at the TARDIS, at the Doctor and herself stepping out of it. She waves at herself, and we finally hear the old lady saying "don't step! don't fucking step you dumb ass!", and this time, young!Ruby notices the magic circle just in time to stop the Doctor from breaking it. Old!Ruby, her own ghost all along, disappears, her purpose apparently fulfilled at last, and it's implied young!Ruby has some vague awareness of her lifetime spent in this circle.

So hang on, if it was just Ruby all along, then what the fuck was she saying to all those people to strike mortal fear into their hearts? What the fuck did she say to that hiker? And why would she choose to say it? I legitimately don't give a shit what the answer is meant to be, I know there isn't an answer, what I'm saying is that if you're going to do a twist like this, then it needs to actually serve the narrative: it needs to recontextualise the events we've already seen. In this case, it's just not fucking good enough to say "ahah, it was Ruby all along!", because that's meaningless, there was nothing Ruby-like about the old woman's behaviour throughout the episode, and nothing to explain why her behaviour would've changed to be like this. In RTD's grand political morality play, what the fuck does it mean that Mad Jack's omnicidal campaign was undone by Ruby's old-lady future-self ghost saying something which we never get to hear? Maybe RTD means to suggest that it is impossible to stop these monsters in the real world, because of course, magic like this isn't real in the real world.

And seriously, why the hell did the Doctor disappear—the old lady didn't talk to him! Did she beam bad psychic thoughts at him or something so he'd flee in mortal terror despite being 73 yards away? The episode is uninterested in these questions, and certainly doesn't care to give us anything concrete about how the spell works. Look, I don't even care who Mad Jack is, obviously he's just another guy like the Toymaker or the Maestro or whoever the fuck is going to be the next one of these all-powerful impotent demons, but give me something. Everything that happens in this episode happens "just because", or through Ruby's passivity, rather than through character actions or self-consistent setting details.

I've seen it suggested that all of the inexplicable dialogue in this episode, from the point of the magic circle being broken, is actually just Ruby exerting her own beliefs on reality. Through this lens, the people in the pub go through such incomprehensibly wild behavioural shifts as a diegetic result of Ruby's own gut feelings about how they should be acting. Similarly, Ruby's mum and Kate Lethbridge-Stewart are only reacting the way Ruby feels they should, deep down. I find this argument unconvincing because it's never explicitly mentioned or alluded to in the episode itself, so if this were what was going on, it would immediately be an order of magnitude more subtle than any other bit of writing in RTD's entire series so far. There's been little to nothing in previous scenes with Ruby's family to suggest these kinds of feelings are even latently present; she seems quite secure with her adoptive mother, simply harboring natural curiosity regarding her biological mother. (My girlfriend, who watched this episode with me, and who I have promptly abandoned to write this incendiary review, suggested that a subtler approach with Ruby's mum could've been much more effective: perhaps her mum simply suggests that it's about time Ruby moved out, they can't really afford to keep looking after her, isn't she old enough, wouldn't it be good for her anyway?) Rather than it being some kind of deft narrative masterstroke, the simplest explanation for these scenes being uneven and unrealistic is that RTD is an uneven writer who has always written extremely wooden character interactions in this vein.

This episode invites comparisons to various fascist-Britain political pieces from RTD, such as his plotline with the Master/Harold Saxon. I generally don't think those episodes of RTD's were very good anyway, but this one is objectively worse. Ruby's plotline, meanwhile, is most closely reminiscent of "The Girl Who Waited", one of the better episodes from Moffat's tenure, written by Tom MacRae. In that episode, our companion at the time, Amy Pond, winds up stuck living out years of her life along in a facility. She plays directly off her younger self, and the episode revels in the dramatic irony that everyone involved—both Amys, Rory, the Doctor, and you, the viewer—know it's a foregone conclusion that the older Amy will be wiped away, sacrificed to the status quo. It's fucking fantastic stuff. It's visually arresting. It's emotionally harrowing. Yes, the makeup department struggled almost as much to make Amy look forty as it did with Ruby, but both effects are better than the CGI homunculus that the Doctor became in "The Sound of Drums", so who's to say if they're good or bad.

This episode depressed me thoroughly. I thought the implied rape was a flippant inclusion, and if RTD wasn't willing to do it justice, it shouldn't have been in the episode at all. I thought the stuff in the pub painted an unrealistic and uncharitable picture of what people on this island are like to one another. But these feelings aren't why I think this was an objectively bad episode. I just cannot conceive of a lens where this episode isn't objectively bad, because I believe I fully grasp the themes it was attempting to convey—xenophobia, superstition, abandonment—and reckon there are many aspects of the plot that fail to communicate those themes in a self-consistent way. The nonsensical object-level plot and the intended allegorical throughline are in constant conflict with one another, rather than supporting one another.

Worst of all, I think RTD has continued a running trend of failing to achieve even his most basic mission statement with this new series. He's been determined for Doctor Who to veer more towards fantasy, more towards escapism, more towards feelings of unrestrained joy and wonder. Yet practically everything decays towards deconstruction, if not the exact opposite of presumably the intended message. Nonbinary furby Beep the Meep is actually an omnicidal little monster. The episode about the joys of music is practically devoid of it. There's an episode entirely about the horrors of war and capitalism where like half the cast just die. Rape is something that it's best we don't talk about, at least not in anything more than veiled terms, because that might be inconvenient for people who are more important than you. Isn't this fantastic? Aren't you escaping? Look, "Space Babies" is by no means a perfect episode, but it has come closest to fulfilling the mission brief. At least it made me smile. "73 Yards" is no fun, and no good.

If you enjoyed this review, you can find more of my writing over on Letterboxd. If you didn't, then... sorry?

[hughiecampbelle]

Cicatrix (Kendall Roy Oneshot)

Character/s: Kendall, Logan mention

Word Count: 1,440

Warning/s: scars, scars mention, self-harm, self-harm mention

A/N: Baby girl!!! He deserved happiness and joy and I just love him!!! I've been feeling really bad about the scars that I have from not being in good place mentally so writing this is a teensy bit for therapy lol. I just know Baby Girl would love someone with scars so wholeheartedly 💞 Feedback is always appreciated 💜💖💜

FIC MASTERLISTS/TAG LIST 

The intern, the one with the scars. Thats what Logan calls you. Behind your back, to your face, it means no difference to him. At first you were shocked, rightfully hurt. That was before you realized he could say whatever he wanted regardless of others emotions. Before you came to the conclusion you were the only human in a team of vultures. Carnivorous bastards, starved, left to watch him indulge. The one with the scars. As if that’s all you’d ever be, these marks on your body, massive reminders of all the things you’ve been through, survived, escaped. You wore long sleeves, even when the weather was sweltering. Your legs were always covered. You made sure your attire, your body, was safe from the cool air of the office, from the looks and stares of your co-workers. Sometimes your sleeve slid down, your pant leg rose up. Seconds of exposure were enough to catch his eye, to make yourself known. They all know who he’s talking about. There are scars on your hands, too. Everywhere you could reach, in those moments, were fair game. Raised, faint, but still noticeable. Always noticeable. Gerri couldn’t take her eyes off. You thought you were alone. Stupid. Foolish. Naive. You thought you were alone and you took off your jacket and your sleeves were rolled up. The heater was broken and blasting into the office. You just needed a minute, that’s all. She stopped in the middle of her sentence, an order, another coffee run. She never finished her thought. Karl followed close behind, a look of pity settling into his expression. A perfectly good body, wasted. Ruined. You’d seen that look before. By the time Frank had come in, you were already out the door, excusing yourself to the bathroom, your arm stuck in the sleeve of your suit. 

It made you want to scream. 

Where are they, the one with the scars? The statement sits in your head, sinking in the pit of your stomach, when you hide in various offices trying to catch your breath. Fighting back tears, poorly, that’s when you run into him. Forcefully, around the corner, your hands pressed into his chat before you can register you’ve just bumped into someone. He stands so solid, shocked, ripping off his headphones and sunglasses. You went down like a ton of bricks, unsteady on your feet, the tears falling before you could stop them, too ashamed to look him in the eye. The one with the scars. Thats’ all you were, would ever be, besides the intern who smacked into the boss’ kid. You. rightfully, feared his reaction. You’d only been working with Logan a few months, but you knew his emotional outbursts pretty well. The yelling, the anger, the slammed doors and name calling. That was on a good day. You flinched at the idea of what his children could be like. He held out his hand for a moment, then understood you weren’t looking, you weren’t comprehending, instead crying. He bent down, brown eyes wide, almost helpless. He had no idea what to do when people cried. Hed never learned to comfort anyone. A-are you hurt? D-did I hurt you? He checks himself and you for blood. No, no you just banged into one another. Then why were you crying. Oh, right. He knew where he’d seen you before, a few times. Running around the office, in competition like a dog with your peers. Interns were expendable limbs to his father. D-did my dad do this? He meets your eyes, his tone neither condescending nor angry. This struck a nerve you didn’t know he had. His hand was on your shoulder, burning through the fabric of your suit, all the way through to your skin, your scar tissue. You wanted to shake him off, wipe your tears, pretend nothing happened, but you were locked in place. Defeated. You just shake your head no, not wanting to cause any problems. No, no I’m okay. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to- Don’t worry about it. He doesn’t mean to interrupt, he just can’t stand it. Of course Logan said something, of course he was making you cry, who else would do this? How many interns quit under him? Not enough. Everyone too afraid to stand up for themselves against him. He had to say something, anything, to get this to stop. The look on your face, it broke his heart, whether or not you’d intended it to. 

He had to say something. 

He climbs into bed beside you, pulling the blanket out from around you, a whoosh of cold air frozen against your exposed skin. It prickles. You giggle, falling into him, his warmth. He smells like the sheets, a familiar scent of detergent and a hint of sweet sweat. His smile is so easy, so careless, so bright, burying the two of you under the covers. He can’t take his eyes off you. The mess of your hair, the bags under your eyes, the creases of your face, all of it is a work of art. Proof of God. It’s rare he catches you in this state: comfortable in your own skin, comfortable with him. He can’t take his eyes off you, not wanting to miss a moment. You sleep like a baby squirrel. You had no idea what that meant, but it was cute, endearing coming from him, and he meant it as a compliment. A baby squirrel, curled into yourself, your head against his chest, your breathing shallow. You looked so serene, so sweet, the heat of your face warming his chest. He never wanted to leave you, ever. He wanted the whole world to fade away. Your first encounter was months ago. Neither of you expected it go anywhere near here, but it did. It did and you couldn’t be happier. Ken had said something to Logan, about making his interns cry. It didn’t change anything, not really, but he felt proud to have stood up to him for you. For the next week, he’d linger in the office, by his father, wanting to talk to you again, to have a real conversation with names, with plans. He liked you, he couldn’t stop thinking about you. Not because you were sad or scared, but because you were thoughtful, even towards a monster. You wanted to protect a man without a soul. Anyone else would have thrown Logan under the bus, would have sacrificed him and cashed out. Thats when he learned what he’d been saying, what everyone was saying. The one with the scars? They’re just being sensitive. Even Gerri had shrugged at the comment, as if it weren’t appalling. Horrifying. As if his father hadn’t gone way too far. 

Kendall had seen all of your scars. Every single one. He’d touched most of them, running his fingers over the lines you couldn’t see, but could reach, the first of them before you realized you had a problem, the newest that brought you the most shame. It was hard to stop, to put and end to it. There were periods of rest, lasting months, possibly a year, but you always went back to it when life was cruel and there was no one to go to. He insisted you go to him, and you do, but you can’t burden him with everything. You can’t put all this on him. He doesn’t patronize you or get angry, ever. He’s never raised his voice at you. It would kill him to do so. He reminds you he’s there for you, always, that you have nothing to be ashamed of or feel guilty about. You’d been so afraid to show him your skin. The words flash into your mind every time you slipped off your jacket or unzipped your pants, the kind that everyone had been telling you your whole life. Everyone had something they were ashamed of. Sometimes it was outer, on the body, sometimes it was inner, in the mind. For him it was his blood, his name, his legacy. Scars were nothing. They didn’t shock him or scare him, he wasn’t disgusted by them like you’d been anticipating, they were just another part of you. Another part to love, to care for, to enjoy. After his little outburst, no one referred to you by that name again. They stared, of course, they couldn’t take their eyes off your hands, and arms, and legs. But they never said that horrible name again. Just yours. Just y/n. His y/n, you reminded yourself. You weren’t alone in this anymore. It was you and him now, together always.

[aortaobservatory]

Hello! I've been following your blog for a while and I saw your classpecting questionnaire. I also saw someone else submit their own answers to get a classpect, if that's okay.

1. What is most important to you? - I want to live the life that I want/makes me happy, and I want to create something really good, good enough that people talk about it and it gets remembered after I die.

2. Why is this important to you? - I think the first part is obvious, but also I don't feel like I have a lot of control in my life already and as far as I know I only have one, I don't want to waste it. As for the second part, it's half related to what I just said and half because I feel like art, especially writing, is my calling in life.

3. Why do you do what you do? - I honestly don't feel like I really do much on a day-to-day basis. I'd like to do more, but I don't feel like I have a lot of opportunities, or friends to do stuff with (see below question about flaws)

4. What frustrates or upsets you most? - In general I get frustrated or upset pretty easily, mostly because in general I feel my emotions very strongly (especially negative ones). What frustrates/upsets me the most is people telling me what to feel/think/believe, or telling me that what I'm thinking/feeling/believing is wrong. Doubly so if I'm disagreeing with them on something and they just can't comprehend the idea that they might be wrong about anything.

5. What is in your way? What are your flaws? How do you overcome this? - I'm good at coming up with ideas and starting projects, but I'm bad at finishing them. I'm also shy and (usually) avoid confrontation, and neither like nor know how to initiate conversations. If I knew how to overcome this, I would've done it already.

6. Are you okay with that? - I'm not sure what "that" is referring to. Answers 1, 2 and 4, sure. Answers 3 and 5, no.

(freedom -> Breath), (to mean something -> Light? legacy, to be remembered, to leave an impact -> Doom, Rage, Knight-Page)

(little control -> Prince-Maid), (Hope-Rage), (Space)

lack of Blood, (acquire friends as a form of freedom?), (stuck, desire to do more -> Doom-Life, Space-Time), (lack of control, little opportunities -> Prince-Maid)

Hope-Rage, (inverse -> Hope), (Sylph-Maid, Knight-Page)

(Space, inverse -> Time, good with ideas, bad with commitment? -> Rage, inverse -> Hope), (Sylph-Maid), (Breath, inverse -> Blood)

(unclear -> Maid?), emphasis on freedom, holding strong to the self's own truth

A desire to live the life you want, a life that makes you happy, means you are not currently living that life, and that is visible to you to the point of upset frustration. You hate being told what to believe by others and you're unsure how to move forward, but you lack opportunities and you lack control. Your answers spoke to me as a very frustrated, confused Maid/Page seeking answers.

I have been attempting to pin down a classpect for you from these answers, but there is no one thing that uniquely stands out to me other than you most likely being a passive class within the Sylph-Maid (Enhancers) and Knight-Page (Utilizers) classes.

There are really quite a lot of interesting elements in your answers here. They could combine in any number of ways. I believe you may be Rage-bound, but you could just as likely be Breath-bound or Space-bound, as you have elements of inverses for each, and none overpower any of the others.

I'm still not entirely sure of your aspect; I could make an equal case for each of the three I pointed out. I almost feel as though I was not told something, so, I will leave the decision of your aspect entirely up to you. Your class took me a long time to narrow down, but I am convinced that if you are not a Maid, you may very likely be a Page instead.

For your consideration:

Maid of Breath

Maid of Rage

Maid of Space

Maids start off pushed around by others' view of their aspect, but eventually allow their aspect to heal, restore, and enhance themselves, making them into an entirely new person and purifying their aspect to themselves. They start out relying on others for their aspect or being told by others how to interact with their aspect. Their challenge is to listen to themselves instead of others, and to not let others opinions dilute their aspect as they restore it for themselves and allow it to make them into a new person.

Page of Breath

Page of Rage

Page of Space

Pages start unskilled in their aspect, learning how it works and how to use it to its full potential over time. In their many attempts to master their aspect, they teach others the value of their aspect, becoming an unintentional source of inspiration. Their challenge is to keep at it, learn from failure, and eventually master their aspect, being able to confidently provide their aspect to others.

I do apologize for the wait; I've been horribly sick and am only just now recovering enough to post this for you. Speaking of, if you'd like to follow up with me on this, you're more than welcome to! I'm certain with a bit more information I can point you in a more concrete direction than this, and I can't deny I'm intrigued by all the possibility you have. However, in the end, only you decide what fits.

[2n2n]

ch 109

we're going to have good funny times.....

thinking about popping everyone open like pezz dispenser (: maybe Tsukasa was just going to sleep in the big cage in assumption that he'd be brought out to the clockkeepers.... here he is, right where he wants to be!!

ugh its like a dream come true every other panel still... between them...!!! mirroring twins...!!! MOuuuuuu....!!

ugh shes so ... small ... n

the girls look at each other curiously......!

I'm very surprised the official documentation is using his real living name. He's almost always only No. 7 or Hanako in the professional sphere and I had the impression his 'real' name just wasn't relevant in this way to anyone, anymore ... even if they knew it. It's not as if this is a government affair, get out his ID... Amane himself looks kind of weirded out to hear it.

not so business title anymore....

of course, Akane already knows his identity (+the existence of a brother, named Tsukasa-- not that he'd know from this encounter that 'Tsukasa' is still around in the school or why) after the Severance, as Nene-chan had informed him of all of that:

♥

so pleasantly introducing himself. Amused you don't know him. I think Tsukasa enjoys his own ambiguity. But I like that, being given 'Tsukasa', Akane can fill in the rest. Right, the twin brother...

aida-sensei really enjoys drawing Tsukasa's pupils as different as can be lately, it is very moe....

meanwhile.... mr. bitch....

foosy foosy fussy hussy... it's too funny his response is to be like.. I DIDD'N DO ANYTHING...! huff...! wasting my precious valuable time, annoying....

thank you Akane for not trusting EITHER Nene-chan nor Tsukasa's possible testimony on Amane.... ♥

Amane getting his karma at last for being a gnasty fuck, GOD BLESS!!! you deserve this so much .... this arc is about Amane getting everything he's had coming to him.... wwwww I'm sorry, you didn't want your otouto to hear you talk like that? Hmmm... but you talk like that in front of Nene-chan all the time! So unfair, your brother should get to know all sides of you, too!

is it worsened x1000 that he has some history of clock tampering Tsukasa just earlier verbally remembered to him...?. it's a bad look Amane.... Tsukasa's innocent staring eyes, he's listening, he's adding this informations to his memory bank... forever and eternally ever... can't take this back.... become pervert brother... brother who wants to do erotic stuff.... Amane, you want to do erotic stuff? Ne? Amane? Amane, do you? What kind of stuff Amane ? Amane would do erotic stuff if time was frozen? Amane wants to have time powers for that? Hmm.. hm. hm. Informations processed into the Tsutsu

god amazing panel love it.... Nene-chan already knows, so the devastation is truly from Tsutsu hearing and commenting, isn't it?

I feel like Amane doesn't think about what he says ........ he gets so capricious and thoughtless .... there are consequences, Amane....

I was joking the other day with my husband, that... Amane's problem, is that neither Nene-chan nor Tsukasa have the 'full picture'. Nene-chan knows he is a pervert (as the one sexually harassed by him so often...), but doesn't really understand the depth of his mental problems, how dangerous he can be. Meanwhile, Tsukasa grasps the depth of Amane's mental problems and how dangerous he is, but has no experience with the pervert. So unfair!!

Truly, Amane will only find peace when all of his girls understand all of his heart.

I'm glad for both Amane getting to experience learning of this plan and I am glad for Tsukasa getting to once again observe Amane having interesting emotions. Another one for the bucket as well in my ongoing crusade to assert to people Tsukasa really is not jealous, he's just interested/curious in Amane's emotions. You wanna kiss? You wanna do erotic stuff? You like when she says that? I take in tha data.

he's a good and honest boy! he tells the truth! maybe when Amane wishes he wouldn't sometimes!

definitely my favorite page of the update, and my favorite addition to the canon.... ahhh!

I love how well this expresses the discrepancy in their characters, their thinking.... Amane, attempting to utilize the powers that exist, to modify the clock, to take control of something established... while Tsukasa wonders what would come of utterly destroying it.

I love Tsukasa having such a thought during his life, seeing Amane toil... it makes me wonder if he even knew of the mysteries then, or not; could he know of the implications of destroying it, or was it a simpler kind of fantasy? Tsukasa... has a side of him that is protective of others, defensive even.... when Mokke go after Amane in twitter doodles, Tsukasa tends to come to punish them. Seeing the clock torment Amane, I wonder if it made him resentful of it for disappointing Amane, for evading him, wasting his time... the clock certainly deserves to suffer for failing to amuse Amane, or help him, in his life. I hope it is serene and refreshing to at last get to disintegrate it. Tsukasa having fantasized about it for some time, makes how he revels in it and his particular mood during its destruction so cute ~~ must feel nice to spin its gears around his fingers and dance around on its corpse~~ la la la ~

so many reasons to be so pleased~~

kind of super relieved in Kako is just some sort of, automaton thang . construct. I'm interested in how Natsuhiko referred to the big clock as a kaii itself, so ... I wonder what No. 1 really 'is' at all?

I wonder what the inside of Mirai is like~

and I wonder what Amane and Teru are going to do about all of this! I'm glad Tsukasa has simplified the altercation. I kind of hope Kako himself is just out of the picture.. we could thin this cast out a little bit.

It's a very action-heavy chapter so I don't have much of depth to offer hehe, it gets like this some times... I'm glad we'll be having a bonus After-School Boy to munch on in just a couple weeks (the 28th?) >w<

[stevetown]

Final Fantasy VII: Rebirth

Playtime: 59h 29m Completed: April 17, 2024

I put off writing this entry because I didn't want to admit to myself that I really did not care for Rebirth. Remake was my favorite game of the last decade, and I rarely get hyped for new titles nowadays, so to swallow the bitter pill and admit the last four years of hype were wasted...hurts.

It happened sometime around Costa Del Sol. After a lengthy chapter involving a card tournament, which itself was followed by a chapter whose climax hinges on a rhythm game parade segment, here was another chapter where you had to complete multiple required mini-games to get tickets to dress our favorite cast of destiny defiers for the beach. On its face, Rebirth should have been exactly what I was looking for. I love these characters so much that just hanging out at the game's equivalent of Atlantic City should have been an easy slam dunk for me. And there are good, if fleeting, character moments to be found here!

But at this point in the game, it became apparent there's no pathos and no forward momentum pulling the party forward other than "I guess we'll bumble around looking for black robed figures." It's a confusing approach to the middle chapter considering even the original was so clear about the stakes for each character and what they were after once they left Midgar. Remake was also so keen on engaging with our knowledge of the original's plot. "You can't fall in love with me" sent me reeling. Rebirth offers no such assurance that it knows nor cares about what's coming.

Emotional catharsis is nowhere to be found. Character moments like Barrett and Dyne's reunion and Red XIII's Cosmo Canyon homecoming are offensively brief, having little to no lead up and no follow through indicating those events had a lasting impact on anyone. The few beats where the game does take swings and add new material are almost never talked about amongst the cast, leading to narratively clashing moments that left us scratching our heads and screaming at the screen for anyone to talk about anything of importance. Whenever the game begins to build any kind of emotional crest, you can count on it falling short of a satisfying conversational resolution if it wasn't interrupted by Yuffie screaming about materia for the thousandth time this chapter.

It's not all bad. There's good stuff here with Cloud and Tifa's relationship. Vincent and Cid's character introductions are highlights that got some good belly laugh's and felt like old school Remake character magic. The second visit to the Gold Saucer got the waterworks going. The combat is more of the same, which is to say fairly good, but it's hard to keep all of the character play styles straight in your head and the Folio system is the worst character upgrade system since Final Fantasy II.

Then there's the climax, which I'm honestly too exhausted to get into. It's not that I hate the idea of what they're going for here, but during the moment where the game needed clarity the most it decided to muddle the message and leave us shrugging more than salivating for part III. It's clear this Final Fantasy VII remake experiment wants to have its cake and eat it too, offer titillating change and remain faithful to the original, but instead offers neither. I'm not left with confidence that Hamaguchi, Nomura and co. know how to wrap this up and deliver a satisfying conclusion to what they kicked off with aplomb and intrigue in Remake.

I did have fun with Rebirth! I put a lot of hours into it, despite the game's incessant efforts to make me hate it at almost every turn (I never want to hold down triangle for three seconds every time I need to do anything in the environment, thanks). There are good nuggets buried deep within the expansive nothingness that is the game's take on Ubisoft map design. But this is a game that is impressively all fat with little meat to chew on. Golden moments are spread too thin, not explored to satisfaction, and at worst become utterly confusing. I know in a year I'll still be pining for the last installment, which is more of a testament to how enduring these characters are than anything Rebrith itself did. I might as well see this through, but I'm left feeling disappointed that Square has shown this experiment to be what I wasn't looking for after all.

[sweet-s0rr0w]

My first Five Faves of the year. It's been A While, I know. I have drafts for others in the pipeline, and then @oknowkiss went and posted two bangers within a couple of weeks and it all went out the window because I just had to go all oknowrec, ya know? Look, whenever I read anything that I ADORE, the first people to hear about it are always my buddies @tackytigerfic and @sitp-recs - and you know I mean it when it's full on caps lock raving DMs - see also @wolfpants' The Hollow and @moonflower-rose's Pissing For England (reclists for both authors hopefully coming soon!) I swear I must have spent a full week going on about the first Elaine fic I read, any day now. I mean, truly, I went through all the emotions with that one: elation at finding such an amazing author, grief at my own inadequacy, anger that it was over - it was a rollercoaster, believe me.

Elaine's turn of phrase is always spot on, her inventiveness in world-building is second to none, and her fics somehow seem to retain this fabulous lightness of tone that keeps things just on the right side of heartbreakingly raw. She's undeniably hugely talented, and now has a fabulous AO3 back-catalogue for you to sink your teeth into, so please waste no more time in checking out her fics!

Read oknowkiss' work here on AO3!

💋 Historians (E, 30k, fake relationship, Gryffindors (and some hangers on), bad skiing, bunk beds, hot tubs, getting together)

Summary: It’s the Dumbledore’s Army Reunion Holiday, and Harry’s found himself in hot water with his friends once again, after telling them he has a boyfriend he definitely does not have. In an attempt to fix things, he’s made it his colleague on Level Nine, Draco Malfoy’s problem too. Featuring a ski chalet in Switzerland, a pair of bunk beds, and an agreement that should’ve been simple, were it not for all the bloody feelings getting in the way.

💋 in between two tall mountains (there's a place they call lonesome) (E, 8.3k, Relic Chaser Harry, researcher Draco, campervans, treasure hunting in Oregon, inappropriately timed wanks)

Summary: In the shadow of a mountain on the Oregon coast, there may or may not lie a shipwreck, on which there may or may not be a magical relic, lost hundreds of years ago. Harry's been tasked with finding it, and Draco is there to take notes, and they're stuck in a campervan pretending to be married, and it's all going to be just fine. That's what Draco's gotten rather good at telling himself, anyway.

💋 any day now (E, 17k, prisoner Draco, Auror trainee Harry, secret codes, a feelings puppet, morally grey everything and everyone)

Summary: Draco supposes he should be grateful. 

The rehabilitation centres were the Minister’s idea, or that’s what the Prophet said anyway. Their stated objective is simple: to provide a safe space for low-tier Death Eaters and high-tier sympathisers to reconsider the entirety of their life choices. All guests–because no one is a prisoner here, the literature brags–are to be provided with shelter, food, clothing, and the guided support of a Mind Healer via a programme they call “ideological restructuring,” which is, of course, mandatory. 

OR: Draco Malfoy considers the circle.

💋 draco malfoy's substitute murder service (E, 11k, curse breaker Harry, various incredible mythological monsters, Christmas)

Summary: When Harry joins the Curse Breakers shortly after his twenty-fifth birthday, he’s surprised to find himself assigned to the Department of Creatures, Cryptids, and Associated Calamities.

OR: the one where Draco goes goblin mode, and Harry has a thing for monsters.

💋The July Tree (E, 52k, Eighth Year, Greenhouse Four, Draco Malfoy does Muggle Scotland, The Who, First Times)

Summary: Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet, nor hail… nor well-meaning friends, nor questionable communication skills, nor seven years of hating each other’s guts can keep Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy from falling in love.

OR: It’s Eighth Year, and Harry Potter has detention. What else is new? Well, since you asked: Greenhouse Four and the Tree of Life, for a start, and then there’s the new shared Eighth Year common room, and Harry’s sexuality, and these pesky dreams he keeps having about a blond man pushing him into things…

Previous Five Favourite Fic Posts: thestarryknight | vukovich | fwooshy | lq_traintracks (and 10 more) | tackytiger (and microfics) | m0stlyvoid | peachpety | magpie_fngrl | shiftylinguini | onbeinganangel | veelawings | shealwaysreads | loveglowsinthedark | birdsofshore | maesterchill | frayach | graymatters | bixgirl1 (part one/part two | skeptique)

[anfie-in-the-box]

Dreamtale_Not_Found & Aftermare Week

Notes

Another difficult day, but once again I did it! And I do feel better already. Bend but never break.

As usual, minor spoilers for the main work — Dreamtale_Not_Found.

。。。

Neither fight nor flight

"so how're things with the villagers?" Geno asks with barely concealed worry. They rarely talk about Nightmare's troubles in Dreamtale, but when they do, there are always heartfelt words of reassurance and love at the end of their conversation. Geno's always had a way to see right through Nightmare, to know when he needs help the most.

Today isn't a bad day though. They sit together on the carpeted floor of Geno's room, chatting about everything and nothing when Geno just asks out of the blue. Surprised and perplexed, Nightmare answers, "Most got bored a long time ago, but that also means only the worst ones stayed; but you already know that. Why ask?" 

Geno looks at him, calmer than before, "i don't know. maybe i just anticipate good news?"

"You know what? I have no idea how you do it, but you're right again," Nightmare admits. "I think… I think I no longer care about them or what they do to me. It was a long journey, but I'm finally here. A few days ago Dream brought a piece of fabric and together we made a cape for me so I could go to the village unnoticed. Not because I'm afraid but simply so no one wastes my time."

Geno blushes bright red suddenly. 

"What?" Nightmare asks, alarmed. "Was it something I said?" 

Geno smiles widely and whispers, as if sharing a secret, "it suits you to feel so confident and strong." 

Nightmare pretends to be surprised (and not flustered, nu uh, no way) and exclaims, "So you're enamoured! Why, Geno, that's so sweet of you!" 

"quit teasing, i'm simply telling the truth; whose fault is it that you're so ethereal?" 

Embarrassed, Nightmare tries to change the topic, "Are we flirting or talking about my life?"

"flirting while talking about your life, especially when it's getting better," Geno grins. "any complaints?" 

"None whatsoever." Nightmare smiles in return and makes a hand heart. Geno pretends to shoot an arrow, and Nightmare falls on his back, gasping, "My heart!" They laugh and then stay comfortably silent for a few moments. 

Nightmare is the first to continue their conversation. "Today was actually the first day I tried the cape on and went to the village," he says, quietly. "Nobody cared for who was likely just another traveler. It was so… freeing. Exhilarating. I finally got to explore my own world." 

Moving closer to Nightmare, Geno murmurs, "you felt trapped all your life; you were trapped, the same as me." 

"Yet so differently," Nightmare adds.

The conversation ceases. Geno lies down close to Nightmare; their shoulders would be touching if Nightmare were tangible. They glance at each other, their eye-lights shining with fondness. Both can't help smiling; or at least Nightmare can't.

"you know what?" Geno suddenly asks. 

"What is it? Do tell." Nightmare looks at him, interested. 

"ever heard of the fight-or-flight response? don't answer, it's a rhetorical question. what i want to say is, you got to the stage where there's neither fight nor flight anymore. even before, at least for just a moment, you forgot all about those who hurt you so terribly. and now, they have no control over you at all. you're your own hero. you're stronger than them, and i said it already but will repeat it again — oh, how it suits you to feel confident and strong."

Nightmare hangs onto every word, enchanted with Geno's emotions — there's so much love, so much pride in his soul, it'd be impossible to ignore even if Nightmare wanted to.

"Neither fight nor flight… You're absolutely right," he whispers. "I love you so much. You're so very loveable; and, as you and Dream remind me, so am I. Let's not forget that."

"together."

"Yes. Together."

。。。

Credits

Undertale © Toby Fox

Nightmare!Sans © jokublog

Aftertale © loverofpiggies

Aftermare Week © @bluepallilworld

。。。

Notes

I had no ideas for either of the prompts, so I used both and neither at the same time, and it worked!

Take care 🌻

[theambitiouswoman]

Hi. I have been reading your posts lately and got so much inspired. It was helping and suddenly it feels like I'm back to square 1. Also this boy I'm talking to online, he's literally a red flag with insecurities, defensive,kinda misogynist,andrew Tate's fan etc., and we had so many senseless arguments because he thinks I have opinions on everything,one time he called me dumb, useless, lame, a waste of time and that's bad so I thought he hated me. But 2 days back he was telling how he always liked me and he thinks I'm cute and he likes talking to me,like how is it possible like we have had arguments everytime we talked immediately after that he said he thinks I'm hot and he touches himself thinking about me. Like wth, like for some reason I'm attracted to him so I'm still talking to him. I don't like this. It feels like I'm going off track. And it's been distracting, his words. I don't know what to do. Feel so helpless. I have an important exam in 2 months, it's literally life and death for me. And I don't feel motivated. My brain is all scrambled it seems to me.

Hi!

I want to emphasize the importance of taking care of your well-being and mental health. It's concerning to hear that the person you've been talking to online displays some red flags such as insecurity, defensiveness, and misogynistic views. It's crucial to remember that you deserve respect, kindness, and support in your relationships. Engaging in constant arguments and being subjected to derogatory comments is neither healthy nor productive.

I would strongly encourage you to reconsider your involvement with this person. It's not healthy to continue talking to someone who disrespects you and makes you feel helpless. You are not even dating this person, and there is already conflict. Conflict which shouldn't exist considering we date people because we have some level of compatibility. I think you might be addicted to the highs and lows, the challenge of the situation as a whole. Maybe even the attention they give you. The fact that he goes back and fourth from arguing to complimenting you in a sexual manner shows that he is not a great guy. A man, especially a man who is just starting to court you should not be sexualizing you and as a woman who would be interested in a romantic scenario would not allow disrespect from a man who she barely knows.

It's important to recognize that words can have a powerful impact on our emotions and self-esteem. When someone repeatedly puts you down or makes derogatory comments, it's natural to feel hurt, confused, and even distracted. But it is also important to remember that no one good for us is going to serve as a distraction. And someone who takes your focus from your own goals and studies, is doing just that. There is no added value or benefit in this scenario for you. No one who likes you is going to put you down, criticize you or do anything to risk their chances with you.

Be kind to yourself. It's normal to feel off-track and overwhelmed at times. Remember that setbacks are part of life, but what matters is how we respond to them. Take one step at a time and trust in your own resilience to overcome challenges.

Wishing you the best of luck with your exam and a brighter, more positive future ahead!

[ellestra]

Better without action scenes

I waited a week to write down my thoughts about the Secret Invasion and I'm still not sure what they are. There were moments when I almost liked the show but then they were instantly squandered by some baffling and incomprehensible decisions.

It's one of those shows so hellbent on keeping its viewers guessing it becomes impossible to either track or care what is happening.

Peple concentrate on the things like bad CGI or boring fights but the truth is bad special effects never really stop people from engaging with a story (see Doctor Who or puppet shows). You will suspend disbelief if you want as long as the story is engaging enough. As long as you follow emotional journeys and plotlines. When they become all scrambled by trying to shock the viewer it all falls apart.

MCU uses to be really good at remembering that but recently they are slacking. It becomes an exercises of going from one cool idea to another cool idea but the connection between them seems to drawn by crayons.

Like everything between Fury and his wife was great. The history between them, the love, the hurt, the distrust and the longing was played beautifully and it was easy to believe it was always there throughout MCU even if we saw her the first time in second episode of this series.

Same with Talos when you can feel both the decade long friendship and all the times it failed. And generally a lot of word battles work great Fury with Rhodey and with Grvik and with Sonia (even if the final one is undermined by it not being Fury there).

But then you have everything that fails and most of it is plot. The need to keep us guessing leads to lack of proper set up of many of the plot points and then half of them is just dropped or leads to nothing. Like Skrull Council was pointless, so was New Skrullos, and so were the deaths in the end. The show introduces characters that seem important but they get couple of scenes that were so underwhelming you ask why even waste time on them - Pagan, Beto, Sonya's boss (what a waste of Tony Curran - again) etc.

What was the point of the rebellion against Gravik beside death of all those Skrulls he recruited? I'm sure the idea was something about him also selling false promises and then disposing of people he used just like he says Fury does but the show did absolutely nothing to sell it. Also the whole plan of killing 8 billion people so 1 (one!) million Skrulls have somewhere to live is ridiculous. Just like there being no other place in universe for them. One million is so little. With Superskrulls they could've just find themselves their own Knowhere.

It's worst with G'iah who is so enigmatic a character and the show tries to keep so many things about her in the is she or isn't she limbo there is no real sense of why she does anything. She seems to be close to Gravik but also not. She switches side to work for her father again but doesn't believe in him (she's right - his plan is one a teenager would thought out not a gown man who saw how humanity reacts to refugees for decades). She dies, she lives, she gets superpowers and the most reaction we get to all of it is when she is with Priscilla. Both her parents are dead. Everyone she believed in failed her and you can barely tell what she thinks about it. Or what she wants. She's just there. And I'm not blaming Emilia Clarke for it. I blame the show for trying to hide so much about her she ends up with no character at all.

They try to shock us with death of important characters like 4-5 times (Rhodey doesn't really count I suppose) with like half of those being fake out but instead of being shocked I ended up being just angry. Neither loss of Maria Hill nor Talos really did that much to make the story more poignant. It didn't even do that much for Fury's character development (his talks to Varra were much better at this). It all just left bad taste in my mouth. And the constant so who is really dead dead didn't help either. And the show doesn't properly emotionally engage with those deaths so neither do ewe as viewers.

For me the most ridiculous isn't the big battle but when Fury changes clothes in the mausoleum. It supposed to be this badass moment of him regaining his mojo or something but it just underwhelming. Like the whole show.

The less said about Ritson the better.

In the end my favourite parts where the ones with Olivia Coleman. This show justified its existence by introducing Sonya Falsworth and I'm actually looking forward to her and G'iah working together in the future.

[splendentmoon]

Incorrect Quotes/2/

I was surprised that many liked the randomness of the squad.

So here's more on the chaotic squad.

enjoy!✨

---------------------------

Jin: Red Son's relationship with his two supposed best friends is on the one hand...

MK: I really care about your feelings!

Red Son: I really care about YOUR feelings!

Yin, turning his head: ...and on the other side...

Red Son: YOU DON'T HAVE TO COME WITH ME WHEN I COME TO THE HOSPITAL!

Spindrax: I WOULDN'T HAVE TO SPEND SO MUCH TIME WITH YOU IN THE HOSPITAL IF YOU'D STOP INSISTING ON FIGHTING EVERYONE WITHIN A FIVE FOOT RADIUS OF YOU!

---------------------------

Jin: What does "take out" mean?

MK: Food.

Yin: Dating.

Spindrax: Murder.

Red Son: and can be all three if you're brave enough

---------------------------

Red Son: -visiting the squad- Hello, I just came to-

Red Son: -sees Jin pushing Yin into the washing machine while Spindrax records and MK just watches-

Red Son: -walking away- Something suddenly came up.

---------------------------

Red Son: Huh, Yin? Spindrax is in the pool and I don't think they're waterproof.

Yin: what?

MK: I think they meant, Spindrax is drowning.

Yin: WHAT?!

-In the meantime-

Spindrax: -chokes-

Jin: OH MY GOD, SPINDRAX! KEEP SWIMMING!

Sprindrax: I can't swim, idiot— -sinks-

Jin: SPINDRAX!

------------------------------

-Chaotic Squad's thoughts on the stabbing-

MK: I would never stab anyone.

Yin: I would stab someone in retaliation.

Spindrax: Scream "I won't hesitate, bitch!" first.

Jin: I would stab without warning.

Red Son: I would stab as a warning.

------------------------------

Yin: Alright everyone! Let's take a vote!

Jin: A secret vote. Everyone close your eyes.

-the squad closes their eyes-

Spindrax: We don't see the result!

Jin: Well, say your vote out loud.

Red Son: Won't we recognize each other's voices?

MK: Yin is right.

-------------------------------

Yin: How would you like your pancakes?

Red Son: Flat.

MK: With sparks!

Spindrax: chocolate chips.

Jin: Potatoes.

-Red Son, MK and Spindrax look at Jin-

Jin: what? Together they are good.

----------------------------

Jin: Hey, can we stay in your bedroom tonight?

Yin: why?

MK: Spindrax fiddled with a ouija board and cursed ours.

Jin: and neither she nor Red Son know how to banish the spirits, so they just throw salt at them and yell "DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A HOTEL TO YOU?!"

-----------------------------

Red Son: Did you bring MK?

Yin -gesturing to Jin-: No, but I brought the next best thing.

Red Son: Jin? The next best thing would be Spindrax.

Jin: I'd be offended, but Spindrax is freakishly strong.

------------------------------

Yin: If you had a drink every time you made a bad decision, how drunk would you be?

Jin: maybe a little drunk?

Spindrax: Drunk.

Red Son: Wasted.

MK: Dead.

------------------------------

Yin: What makes you all smile?

MK: Friends and Family.

Jin: Snacks.

Spindrax: Victory and success.

Red Son: Muscles of the face.

----------------------------

Jin: You lying piece of shit!

Yin: Oh yeah? You're the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do, WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!

Spindrax: I'm going and taking MK with me!

Red Son -collecting cards-: and that's enough Monopoly for today.

-----------------------------

Jin: Look guys, I need help.

Yin: Love help?

Red Son: Financial help?

MK: Emotional help?

Spindrax: Help move a body?

-Everyone looks at Spindrax-

Spindrax: What?

--------------------------------

Spindrax: Are oranges called oranges because oranges are oranges or are oranges called oranges because oranges are oranges?

Yin: Which came first, the orange or the orange?

Red Son: Orange was first used to refer to the fruit 1,280 years ago, but it wasn't used as a color until 1,000 years ago.

Jin: What was the color called before then?

MK: There was no color, duh! Everything was black and white!

--------------------------------

-In a group chat-

Red Son: A pegan just flew into my window.

Jin: Do they hit?

Yin: what?

MK: Oh yeah, my favorite bird, Pegan.

Spindrax: I thought you said penguin for a second, LMAO!

MK: Just a normal day with flying penguins crashing through my window.

Yin: Do you have pigeons flying towards your window? I can't relate, I have penguins flying up to my window.

Red Son: I literally made a typo.

---------------------------

MK: Do plants have feelings too?! What is this? Now I can't eat!

Yin: You can eat a stone.

Jin: Air.

Red Son: The fabric of time and space.

Spindrax: Drinking a bottle of bleach can solve all your problems.

MK: You guys are not useful.

-------------------------------

Yin: What's the worst thing you've ever done?

MK: I rickrolled my teacher in 4th grade.

Jin: I kicked Yin in the shin.

Yin: -So I kicked Jin between the legs.

Red Son: I burned down a city.

MK: What?!

Spindrax: What the hell is wrong with you?!?

Red Son: Many things.

Jin: No shit.

-------------------------------

I hope you enjoyed it!

thanks for the support!

See ya!✨