#neil is demi.

[sillysapphillean]

Just saying but this too is erasure of neil's demisexuality

Yes there is a level of obliviousness leading up to neil's realization that he's into andrew, but that still only started after a build up of a bond between them.

Stop trying to find ways to twist his experience into something allo. Stop equating his first moments of trusting & developing a bond with anyone outside of his mother to catching feelings. This was the start of the groundwork necessary for neil to be able to develop feelings, not the the moment he started developing feelings.

[chaoticas-hell]

Neil being demi is actually so important I will fight people on this. It fits his character so perfectly and I get upset when people erase his ace-ness just my demi king live his demi life

[doorhanginoffthehinges]

Interviewer: if you could kiss anyone in the world who would it be?

Neil : my beautiful husband andrew minyard

Interviewer: that doesn’t count. You do that anyway.

Neil, not hesitating: Your Mom

[satanic-foxhole-court]

One of my favourite types of Neil fics is Neil coming to terms with the fact that’s it’s okay to want Andrew. That it’s perfectly appropriate to crave him, think of the what it’s like to feel Andrew’s mouth on his body, to fantasise.

From an asexual spectrum experience I have incredibly rare sexual attraction (and romantic but not the point here), and it’s so relatable for me to read Neil being ashamed, confused and even annoyed at himself that he’s like that because it wasn’t like that before. A level was unlocked, a wax seal was broken, a fire was started and there’s no undoing it. Time for Neil to get used to the new normal of wanting Andrew in a sweaty, sexual, craving, crawl into Andrew’s chest if Andrew let him way.

[foxhole-pipe-dream]

The most important updates from Nora's recent tweets, TO ME.

[joanofexys]

pssst friendly reminder that the only canon label we have for Neil's sexuality is demi (aspec) and that he's otherwise unlabeled. hc what you want but stop trying to push it as canon or putting it over his only canon label.

i'm tired of seeing y'all erase aspecness as a valid sexuality and always feeling the need to pair it with another identity as if aspec people aren't valid just identifying as aspec and also erasing us from the conversation entirely

[koldefingre]

Pride month andreil <3 sketch

[jean-meowreau]

I'm ready to give. A hot take about asexual Neil.

Because as an ace-spec person who enjoys sex as an activity for my partner(s) involved, people trying to erase poly/multi-shipping Neil by saying "He's demi so he wouldn't fuck them" have me really on edge. Sex isn't always about deriving personal pleasure. Sex can be an act of intimacy between partners where one gets more out of it physically than the other. You are aware good, consensual sex can happen between partners where one(OR EVEN BOTH/ALL!) of them don't orgasm?

Outside of just a kink scenario with a scene that is meant to instill frustration/not end in orgasm, you can just make out for fun. You can give handjobs and touch and finger and stroke and fondle and pinch and bite and suck and lick and fuck and enjoy just one partner getting their fill. You can top or bottom and not orgasm and still enjoy the experience for what it brings the relationship. (Not to mention Stone Tops are a real thing.)

Sex comes in many forms. Sex doesn't have to end in an orgasm for all involved. And Sex isn't always a defining characteristic for a relationship.

All I'm saying is is stop your ace erasure because you have a preference to only ship Neil a certain way. Your preference is valid until you use a label and twist its meaning to get what you and only you want.

Enjoy your Neil time, but also beware that everyone has their own Neil doll and can play with him however they want. He can slut it up(so to speak) or he can never have sex or experience sexual attraction except once a decade on a night with a specific moon cycle when the conditions are perfect - fandom is meant to be a space to enjoy these characters as they are and/or however we want.

From an ace/demi queer person, please stop taking my sexuality and using it to hurt others who want to enjoy Neil differently than you. Thank you.

[biawstenknight]

I'm probably the nth person to say this but we rarely get any aspec leads so for neil to be canonically confirmed demi is a pretty important thing to me and regardless of whatever other orientation he is in addition to that he's still queer, and if I see one more post ignoring that just for shipping purposes I'm going to throw hands

[cyndaquillt]

Baffling to me how Neil Josten is unbelievably good at flirting but also unbelievably dense about it

[jortenthusiasst]

Neil josten probably:

"But I'm an exy player !!!"

Haha but I'm a cheerleader reference

[chaoticas-hell]

Andrew: can I have my sweater back?

Neil: can I have my virginity back?

The Foxes:

Kevin: now you all understand my suffering

[youdontknowhowtodiequietly]

neil josten is demisexual, and, i argue, demiromantic too. he said he didn't swing because he was never allowed to form any meaningful contact with anyone outside of his mom. but he was aware he was capable of attraction. that is why he is demi. i love Nora, she gave demi people recognition in a time where everyone was very hostile to asexual people in general (tbf they still are hostile because people are fucking idiots) and i think it's beautiful

[aaron-minyard]

happy pride month to the fruitiest team in all of collegiate exy

[mostlymaudlin]

not responding directly to that post abt Neil’s demisexuality bc i have no ill will toward op or anyone reblogging it but also I have thoughts. it’s a very slippery slope to put rules on what’s ooc or not in fanworks. its nice to be able to see ourselves in characters and it’s totally fair to not enjoy portrayals of said characters that we disagree with. but when we find a connection with the source material, then imo that’s the end of where we get to claim any type of ownership of a character — fanfiction is the wild west and there’s no point in introducing morality to it when so much exists and it all caters to different audiences. to me, “ooc” is not a real thing, because every fic writer is going to portray the characters different than the source author does, because that’s how art works. so if people want to make neil more sexual in fanworks then that’s their right — we have the power to grimace and close the tab when we find fic we don’t like. it just means it’s not for us. but it’s not inherently wrong. esp with neil, his backstory and relationship to sexuality are so complex. he literally avoids thinking abt it at all in the books except for what’s happening right in front of him with andrew. there’s actually so much wiggle room! like, he literally says allison is “hot but off limits” at one point before spiraling into thoughts abt his mom — im not at all saying this proves he’s not ace/demi, or that he’s attracted to allison, but there’s lots of ways to interpret that. and there’s plenty of things about neil that people might connect with beyond sexuality — like, that’s not the only reason to be writing about him. fic writers might be more focused on exploring other aspects his character and that’s their right. and ofc worth mentioning that the aspec experience is soooooo vast like for me, i am aspec but if i vibed w someone even on a platonic level right away and they wanted to, i might smash bc im sex-neutral & it could be fun even if I’ve got a different relationship to attraction/arousal.

ANYWAY fanfiction is a contribution to a community, but individual works are not community-owned… we’re free to dislike anything, but i think it sets us all up for failure to make claims abt what’s a right or wrong way to portray characters in fic