#needed to keep it within what hed reasonably be able to get
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snobgoblin · 1 year ago
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HEHEHEHEH I was curious to see how much his outfit would be, you know, assuming he didn't steal it or find it in the trash (which he probably did) SO all of these items, NEW, would be this much! I tried to find reasonable prices, while also avoiding temu and shien and similar sites (which was way harder than you'd think damn, especially for the shoes) anyway I used Craig McCracken's list of the components of Aces outfit for this
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so that makes $153.47, which is $63.52 in 90s money (I don't know how much exactly each of these would have cost, I just adjusted for inflation)
interestingly, the boots, pants, and shirt were all listed as women's clothes
also- I debated adding the gel to this but calling it part of the outfit was a stretch, and I was already stretching with the shades... also I couldn't find an exact match for the vest unfort
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fyodors-husband · 5 months ago
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Hihi! Can i request some Verlaine sfw and nsfw hcs??? I hope you have a good day!!!
ANON I LOVE YOU.
(Also I assumed you meant x reader so i made them that way, i can make another if it's general hcs!)
Thank you so much for giving me a chance and reason to write for him 💜 he's my favorite!
I hope you have an amazing day aswell!
Also, I apologize if you've been waiting a long time for me to answer I've been less active since my semester is just ending now, but over the summer I'll be much better!
Anyways, here's NSFW and SFW Paul Verlaine HCs!
CW: smut, Very very very slight OOC (we don't mischaratarize verlaine here), stormbringer spoilers, no beta we die like the flags (I'm sorry 😭)
°~•~○~°~•~○_FLUFF BELOW THE CUT_○~•~°~○~•~°
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Verlaine is a very clingy lover, some might even say possessive, the thing about him though is he dosent want to control you
He loves you alot and he feels that your the only person who loves him, so he dosent want to loose you
But he also wants you all to himself, know what I mean?
during, and post stormbringer, he's a spy (post he's in the pm basement but still a spy)
So he's probably got money, and once of his love languages is definitely giving gifts
Another is acts of service. Definitely
Hes not to good at showing his affections for you, so he'll do things for you and buy things for you to try and make up for that
If you knew him pre / during strombringer, you'd be able to see how he's changed between during / post, especially pre / post rimbaud incident (death) and he'd honestly be so grateful that you still love him after all of that
Hed be insecure though, that you'd leave him, please reassure him you do love him alot
Hes definitely a fan of cuddling / snuggling up to you (after a while)
He wouldn't be very open to touch in the start of the relationship (maybe holding hands)
But as he comes to trust you and realize you do actually love him he's alot more fond of touching you and maybe even some PDA
Takes you on the fanciest dates, anywhere you want to go, to the most high-end restraints definitely (he'll have a subordinate get it for you and take it in if he can't leave the basement)
Flowers, lots of flowers, one of thoose guys who keeps one for himself so he knows when he needs to get you new ones
°~•~○~°~•~○_NSFW BELOW THE CUT_○~•~°~○~•~°
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Switch.
Definitely takes him alot of time to be comfortable enough to trust you with something like actual sex
Within the first few months you've had your first kiss and cuddled
After the six month mark you've most likely made out, but never done anything more
Possibly he'd service you but he's also nervous
Hes not a virgin per say, he definitely has experience, just not alot
When he finally comes around you will not regret waiting
So soft and gentle with you the first time, checking to make sure everything is okay, the most considerate lover
Hes take it very slow at first, especially your first time together, finding out what you like and what you dont and what he can and can't do
After all the foreplay and that, he could get a little rough, not on purpose because he'd never want to hurt you, (without previous discussion) and as soon as you tell him to slow down or stop he would
After the first time, you two talk about what you do and don't like and he's very respectful of it
If you like to be degraded, he'd most likely only say a little bit, he dosent want to hurt your feelings or mentality by accident
he's a hand holder during sex, or some part, he has to be holding onto you all the time atleast on one spot
Scared you'll disappear honestly
If you want to top him, he'd take some time to come around as that's a whole new level of trust but it wouldn't take him as long as it did to agree to sex
Maybe a week or two at most
If you do top him please be gentle, very into soft making love more than rough fucking
Don't degrade him he will cry :(
very very into praise, tell him how good he's doing and how pretty he is, he'll melt (and probably still cry, but not in a bad way)
Will absolutely die if you show any concern for him if he winces or groans, wouldn't think you cared that much about him
He still holds onto you even when he's on the bottom, wraps his arms around your neck
The position is definitely tame at first, he wants to always be facing you aswell, whether he's top or bottom, to make sure your okay and if you two can keep going
He miiiiight be open to positions where he isn't facing you but again, takes a couple weeks
Afterwards very clingy, dosent want to get up or clean up, just wants to lay and hold you
Basically no pillow talk, only because, as i said, not very experienced so he falls asleep quickly
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moodymisty · 2 years ago
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I always imagined Cross' eyes to be sensitive and get strained sometimes and when they do he'd turn into a teddy bear or smth he'd just want to cling to you and bury his face into your shoulder to keep the light away while so needy for cuddles or hugs and his squad is just like
🕴 that our Cross?? (bc before he met reader if his eyes got strained hed be the most grumpy gremlin his brothers have ever met)
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[ 𝕸𝖔𝖔𝖉𝖞𝕸𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖞'𝖘 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙 | 𝕬𝖔3 ]
Author's Note: This is so cute!! I love the idea that Crosshair has eyes just as or close to as good as Hunter's thanks to his enhancements
Summary: Crosshair might be a loner but even he knows that sometimes tender loving care is what works best.
Relationships: Crosshair/Gn!Reader
Warnings: Mentions of sensory overload, fluffy, Crosshair being a grumpy little shit that needs cuddles,
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-Hey. You busy?
Looking over at your datapad you see a message from Hunter, before glancing back at your computer. Hunter knows damn well that you're always busy, it's more so a matter of if you're too busy to sneak away and do whatever he has in mind.
Well, your work is practically done, so you'll message back in a few minutes once you're free. Because you know damn well that once you start with them, you'll be roped into whatever mess is currently happening. Before you have a chance to finish however, Hunter gives some much needed context to his earlier message. Not too much, however.
-Come here and help deal with Crosshair.
Since when did you become the resident sniper tamer?
Though Hunter knows you well enough, as even though you don't respond, you quickly finish up what you've been working on before getting up. Their barracks are a good ways across the base so it's a decent walk, enough that you can send a quick message.
-On my way.
Part of you is curious what in the galaxy could warrant such am urgent sounding message from Hunter; Though you'd probably never be able to hazard a guess. Hunter doesn't respond, largely because he knows you'll be there the moment he does. Their barracks are a good ways out of the way, but the walk isn't that far. Tech has it timed, actually; In another odd random bit of knowledge he has stored away in the brain of his.
It seems this time you were particularly speedy, as he's a few seconds off when you arrive, the door opening. The moment you enter you can feel the tension, as everyone hovers around the center of the room. Hunter comes up to you, and you whisper:
"What happened?" Looking over to see Crosshair on his bunk, with everyone glancing his way, but attempting to be subtle about it. His hand is pressing against his eyes and forehead, hard enough that he surely can't see very well. Hunter fills you in with the only word that is necessary.
"Flashbang." Oh no.
You know Crosshair's eyes are incredibly sensitive much like Hunter's, which also makes him very sensitive to things like bright lights. The two of them are the main reason why they have the lights in all their barracks, and the Marauder, dimmed so low.
Tech is hovering close by, the closest that the Batch has for a medic keeping an eye on a fuming Crosshair. Wrecker comes closer to check and gets venom spit at him, before he presses his hand back onto his face.
While his brothers are concerned and wanting to help, hovering and asking constantly if he's ok are both things that don't work intermingled with someone like Crosshair. You know that he just wants pitch black, and silence that's just as deep as possible.
Sighing softly you step away from Hunter, walking over to his bunk. You don't say anything, just sit on the edge and gently put your hand on his shoulder. You've delt with this Crosshair before, so you have a decent idea of what helps and what doesn't.
Within a few minutes he pulls you closer to him, forcing you to lean back more until you're partly laying down. He wraps his arms around your body, as his face presses against the black of your shirt above your chest but below your shoulder; Wrecker groaning and walks by yelling:
"Hey! Keep it clean, we're still here!" Wrecker jokes, laughing loudly.
Crosshair's hand quickly darts out to get a piece of Wrecker, who deftly dodges it.
"Fuck off."
He feels your hand gently on the back of his head, fingers playing with the short hair at the nape of his neck. His arms tighten around your ribs even more. His head is throbbing so much he doesn't care how he looks, or that what his brothers are saying isn't actually insulting. He'll just act like it is, and bite at them none the less. In a bit he'll be back to normal, but for now he'll indulge.
It's hard to believe that you've actually been a positive influence on his overall attitude, until you have times like this.
"Just leave him alone, Wrecker." Echo quietly speaks up from across the room, where he's cleaning dirt from the inner seams of his armor pieces.
You kind of wish you'd brought your datapad with you in hindsight, as now that Crosshair has you trapped, you have one hand completely empty as the other lays on the back of his head. It's also a little boring, just watching his brothers go about their individual work as quiet as possible.
A few months ago Crosshair would've never even considered doing anything remotely similar to this, but thankfully his edges have been buffed just the tiniest, tiniest little fraction.
You remember a long while back Crosshair had muttered that he didn't deserve you, and while you had vehemently denied the notion, he didn't seem to take it entirely to heart. You only hope these sorts of gestures help reassure him, relaxing with him as the thumping of his headache ever so slowly goes away.
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love4jhene · 1 year ago
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nsfw alphabet | chris sturniolo😛
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omg this is kinda awk, ive never written smut or anything related to smut but wtv i think off i start writing it, these r my preferences abt chris sturniolos nsfw alphabet 😭
A= after care (what there like after sex😼)
i feel like chris isnt big on after care, cuz ooo girl after he hits his high he can already feel the wave of tiredness come rushing over him, the second his head hits the pillow hes out like a light, but dont worry hell take care of you whenever he wakes up😛
B= body part (there favorite part of your body (his body too)
he guves me the vibes that hes a breast guy, and a thigh guy hed be staring 24/7 cuz there cs smack dap in his face?? his favorite body part of his are his hands, cuz he is able to touch every inch of your body with the palm of his hands👍🏿
C= cum (what does he do with it??)
ik hes a guy that likes to cum on your face, maybe give you backshots??? or js fill u right up!🤠 (only if your on the pill duh) he doesnt like to make a huge mess since it ends up in HIM having to wash the sheets but then again its for pleasure, if you want him to cum on your face nd shit hed do it within the moment you finished saying it😉
D= dirty secret (something that you dont know about until he tells you)
chirs definitely has a mommy kink and enjoys it when you pull on his hair, its not a bad secret but its more of an embarrassing secret. it gets less embarrassing when you do it more often to the point he just wants you do to it when your out in public.
E= experience (how many bodies?)
he has never had proper sex until you, ik he was a lil player😝 but it never got that far it would only be making out, and some grinding ykyk, but yeah nothing like what you guys have done besides one time hes had a actual p in v prodution.
F= favorite position (what position is the go to?)
he LOVESSSS it when you ride him LOVES IT, cuz hes able to see those big melons bounce😏 LMFAO and because hes able to see you struggle bouncing on his cock. if you arent able to then hed be grabbing your hips guiding you!
G= goofy (are they cracking jokes?)
hes definitely the type of guy to make a joke here and there, but not all the time cuz thats kinda awk.. but he’d definitely make jokes about his brothers walking in and blah blah blah
H= hair (do the drapes match the carpets? is that how it goes idfk😭)
imma keep it a buck w you. hes probably not big on trimming cuz hes too lazy or sum LMFAOO but he trys his hardest so you dont get grosses out, and he definitely likes a shaved cooter ykyk cuz he likes when yr able to feel his stuble down there WOAH
i= intamicy (how are they in the moment?)
he knows he wants to me all lovey but he cant help making jokes about your moans heres an example. hed make fun of you for saying “its to big, it wont fit!” then a couple seconds later your asking for more hed mock your moans fs😂.
J= jack off (how often?)
i feel like if he tells you hes horny and you say no hes straight up start jacking his shit while your right next to him, but no he doesnt do it often since he claimd he does wanna seem like a “wild animal” thats a horny 24/7, only when hes on tour and he cant help it
K= kink (what are some kinks, IDK WHAT TO PUT)
he defo has a breeding kink, the thought of him “filling you up” gets him so hard for some reason and hed tell you about it while straight up stuffing you, balls deep bro ik this man thinks about you pregnet with his kids😪
L= location (what places does do you guys do it the most?”)
he doesnt likes taking risk. i said what needed to be said, if his brothers arent home, hed wanna do it on the kitchen counter or the couch, but mainly the bed cuz hes able to knock out like a light as soon as you guys are done
M=???
N= No (whats a turn off?)
ANYTHING to do with piss or body liquids😭 he would walk OUT THE HOUSE if you suggest anything of that sort, also being rough with you where it gets to the point it comes to slapping, choking, js being rlly rough in general.
O= Oral ( uhm idk what to say)
hes big on oral, if he could he would stay in between your legs for hours, days, weeks, years. he loves pleasure his lil princess😛 he also loves when he sees YOU between HIS thighs, him pushing your head down ykyk and most of all he loves it when he covers your face w his cum
P= Pace (how fast? how slow?)
he can change between paces. you want him to go fast? hell go as fast as he can, you want him to go slow? anything for you!
Q= quickie (does he like them?)
he isnt big on them cuz if you guys are gonna have sex he wants it to last, only if its needed and if your lookin supa sexc he cant take his eyes off ya😉😏
R= risk (does he take em?)
hes a risky fella and he likes to break the rules! he wont go to to far tho.
S=??
T= toys
why need toys when you got each other.
u=??
V= Volume (how loud is he)
MANS IS A GROANER AND HE DOESNT CARE, he is loudddd and hell let every one know what yall are doing he does NOT contain himself.
w=??
X=x ray (WHAT R UNDER THOSE PANTSSS)
hes defo big and he knows it, id say rougly like 7.5 soft?? 8.2 hard?? idkk thats what im getting😭
y=??
z=zzz sleep
i alr said it out as soon as he hits the pillow he is OUT but he will take care of u in the morning, he needs his beauty sleep
i hope u guys enojoy this was a pain in the ass to write but its a okay!
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wedriftlikelonelyplanets · 2 months ago
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🍓🧃🧸🪲
🍓 - How did you get into writing fanfiction?
ALRIGHT SO I've been involved in the online RP community since I was like 15-ish...i think? Anyhow, I've been writing for literal years. I am, however, incredibly self-conscious about my own writing. I've dwelled in many a fandom space as well, honestly.
After getting into F1, I've felt like I've been kinda on the outskirts of a community I really love (not on the outskirts for a negative reason, I'm just incredibly shy and worry that I'm annoying), and it's given me kinda...I guess a little burst of confidence. I wrote my first fic after the Hungarian Grand Prix of this year because there was just...something SO COMPELLING about the dynamic between Lando and Oscar during/after that race. Since THEN I haven't been able to stop, and I've really been loving being a part of this community.
That, and the fact that the stuff that I've written has been so well received has made me more comfortable to continue writing within a fandom space.
🧃 - Share some personal lore you've never shared before
OKAY WELL THEN...Idk there's a lot I blab about on the internet so I've gotta think about this one.
I have what is probably undiagnosed hEDS (hypermobile ehlers-danlos syndrome), and likely never will be diagnosed because I'm a fat, female presenting woman. This means I experience a lot of chronic pain, and actually deal with regular shoulder subluxations that put a damper in my ability to do my job sometimes
Despite being an elder emo, I've never actually been to a music festival, despite my longing and desire. This is primarily in part due to the fact that I live in a small city in Canada that doesn't really get a lot of fun music in general
I blab about this a lot, but I'm a Registered Veterinary Technologist, and have been for 5 years, and I'm likely going back to school to actually become a vet, because I finally found a clinic that makes me love my job again!!
🧸 - what's the fastest way to become mutuals with me?
UH GREAT QUESTION. I guess interact with me, chat with me, my askbox AND my messages are always open. I don't specifically mean you need to like and comment on my fics, but like...interact with my content. I love to yap, give advice, and just chat. I've dealt with a sudden influx of followers since starting to write fanfic (this is not said to sound vain), and I feel like I can no longer just follow people willy-nilly anymore. Honestly I often do click through to the blogs of new followers, but I sometimes just get overwhelmed.
Hell, even if you just message me and are like "this song made me think of x, y and z" i'd love you forever.
And interact of anon. I love all of you darling anonymous folks that come into my ask box but i want to stroke your faces lovingly and reblog things from your tumblrs and I can't do that when I don't know who you are.
🐞 - Using this in place of the other beetle BECAUSE IT DOESN'T WORK ON MY PC but - Write 50 words for your current work in progress and then post that paragraph here
I see what you're doing, anon, keeping me on task and also getting some snippets out of me...(such a mean trick to play...jk)
“More?” Lando asks, and Oscar shakes his head. Lando places the mug back on the tray, reaches out to brush Oscar’s hair back from his face again, fingers catching in the tangled strands. Oscar leans into the touch, presses his cheek against Lando’s palm, presses a kiss to the inside of his wrist where he can reach it. Just a brush of his lips, softer than soft. It should feel infantilizing, to be cared for like this, but it soothes the part of him that makes him feel like he always has to be calm and collected, always in control
THIS IS MORE THAN 50 WORDS, MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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im-totally-not-an-alien-2 · 2 years ago
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Danny had never liked the guy.
Still, he never thought he would stoop so low to do something like this to his sister. Danny didn't have a lot of options. This world wasn't new to them anymore, they had been here since he turned twelve two years ago and while the superheros were new, people in general were not.
Jazzs boyfriend, Crapface Mcgee was going to get the stuffing beaten out of him once Danny got ahold of him. He pretended to be Jazzs dream guy and convinced her to come help out his family farm in the middle of nowhere because it was struggling.
Only once she got there his entire personality changed like someone flipped a switch. He and his family were horrible to her and she was forced to flee in the middle of the night into a pitch black forest with nothing but the phone her brother had modified to be able to work anywhere regardless of what plane of reality it was on. They likely only let her keep it thinking she wouldn't get any reception out there.
Oh how wrong they were.
Unfortunately for the siblings Danny was still hurting from a fight with some eldrich horror a few days ago and couldn't fly that far away and certainly wouldn't be able to carry her back.
Upon seeing Batmans plane parked somewhere in the dark of Gothams streets he got an idea and told jazz not to freak out and not to hang up. Hed be there soon.
.
.
.
"What are you doing?" Batmans face appeared via some kind of hologram projector while he was already high in the air and while he wanted to fanboy over the high tech he was too worried about his sister. "Look, I'm sorry. I am. But I needed a way to save my sister. It shouldn't take too long and I should be back before tomorrow night."
Batman seemed to process this information, but Danny didn't give him a chance to resond, "Tell me where you want me to park it and I'll be there waiting for whatever punishment you want to deal out." He paused, "Within reason, of course."
Suprisingly, Batman agreed.
And Danny upheld his end of the bargain with his big sister waiting by his side
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dumblemonchickenwing · 2 years ago
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i wanted to draw lesser dad comic continuation on my au about corrupt rouxls but I gave up. the rough script draft is under read more
Lancer magical stool forme
Rouxls facesplat on the floor
A headcanon that Lesser Fathere would rather break his own face than take advantage of his Biggere Son in any way whatsoever
Rouxls as Lady Gaga
(sorry, those above were rough ideas not related.)
=
This world is cruel and nothing makes sense
That “forever” is nothing but fleeting set of lies. Its just a lie you feed those you fail to stand for. You said you loved him and will forever love him, but look at you now. In fact, you heard them say that the world is cruel and you worried that nothing would make sense. You worried nothing you would say or do holds any meaning. 
Nobody knows the truth.
Mayhaps, the truth really is that way.
Perhaps, you really did have your eyes opened. And you know that this world is cruel, and nothing has any meaning.
Then.. if nothing has any meaning..
then why not do what you wanted to do?
if these words hold no meaning, then
why not say them, if saying
 or not saying them
 would make no difference?
You feel that nothing holds any meaning. You have none but evil inside you.
And still those words you wanted to say to Him, still havent gone.
Keeping them inside, doesnt let them go away
You worried so much that you do not deserve to say them
that it would be hypocritic
But days passs by
and that wish wont go away.
Like a bug that keeps crawling around within your ribcage.
He is right there.
Things will never be the same as they used to be.
And you grieve how everything was ruined.
“I could have been a Father.” But even so, right now
You want to come forth.
And he doesnt seem to mind.
In fact, he loves you.
Why do you hesitate?
You worry you will change your mind? You will betray him? You worry about your ever-changing nature?
You worry you will corrupt him as well
But look at him now. He is happy and okay right now. He has friends
that will protect him.
And look at you, Right now. You want to say it. You want to do it. Right now.
“What are you staring at him like that for? Dont you wanna like? i dunno, say hi?” (Susie)
“I am... afraid.
-Young Prince.. is too kind. I am afraid, he loves me, even though I am not the one he should accepteth in his life. He is too sweet, it would lead to his heartache. 
“Afraid? Of hurting him? Listen here, man.. don’t think you’re the only one who feels this way. Even tho Im buddies with him and I constantly drag with around with me, even though we’re having lots of fun and geniunely believe in each other. There’s still that huge part of me that is scared that one day it will all be over. I am terrified of losing him. I still remember how I hurt him. I still remember how I used to be. And I never forget that I’m not really super good. But you know what? I look at this dude and think - woah, he sure is a cool fun guy, itd suck if i’d lose a single day I could spend with him to me sitting alone and thinking about how much hed hate me. And then I get up, and force myself to come up to him. Because i remember, how much it sucked being alone and stuck with myself, every day. And i remember, how much it sucked for him to be alone, and.. who knows, maybe If i’d leave him because i of my inner thoughts, I’d leave him all alone and hurt his feelings.
And, I’m like, not a psychic or a god to decide whats best for him. Idunno, if, like, I wanted him to be my friend but he ‘d chose to leave me for whatever the hell reason he made up, if he would be doing THAT to me, I’d be damn hurt.”
Usually, adults say this bullcrap to excuse them not wanting to deal with their kids, But you.. you actually DO care? What’s your problem, dude? no one freaking stops you. Especially, not HIM.
You feel really helpless and confused, and you worry you will not be able to handle this world’s trials. But maybe this is why you need to return to him? maybe.. you dont have to ALWAYS worry about him? Maybe he feels helpless and confused too, and this is why he needs you, because you understand how he feels.. and thats all that is needed?
Besides.. it’s not just you against the world. We are here too.
He has his mother now, his dad. Susie, Kris. He has friends now. You don’t have to be the exact same you as you were back then. everything is different, but maybe its for the best. 
You dont have to worry anymore.
“Oh hia, Lesser dad!! You hang out with Susie and Ralsei? Cool! Huh? Whats wrong?”
“Oh, your lesser dad just..has some things he needs to figure out.”
Wdym?
“A, he just..has a certain little beetle he wants to visit but he cant decide”
A beetle? Oh I know! You collect beetles I get whatchu talkin about! Lesser dad, you want some advice??
When i was little, my dad used to keep a cool plane model in our mansion. I always wanted to play with it, but I was very scared because I didnt know if i was allowed to touch it. So we kept it behind the glass. i would stand there and stare at it until my dad decided to throw it away. I never truly was sure if i could touch it or not but I felt really sad that I never got the chance to play with it, when it was right in front of me. I was afraid id break it, but in the end, my dad broke it anyway.
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yandereaffections · 4 years ago
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Its rare for sebastian to ever react in any other way than passive to your childrens constant insults, and the times Sebastian did input some type of disciplinary action was when they were younger, now he expects them to be able to act respectful, though their rebellious actions seem to come from a place deeper than just teenage rage
While it may seem nothing more than managing your time between Sebastian and your kids, to them its a fight to keep you away from eachothers influence, especially when they actually start mentioning a divorce 
Sebastians spent years building up your relationship, trust and dependence, he wouldnt simply let his own kin tear it apart like paper. Due to your constant presence in each of your kids lifes Seb isnt able to be as forceful as hed like, cant scare them into submission nor manipulate without you stepping in
He knows theyre constantly on their guard around him, even if theyre just kids the concept of Sebastians relationship with you becomes very clear, how manipulative hes been just to keep you by his side and how hes basically taken you away from everything and everyone you once knew, they have valid reasoning towards hating their father yet no matter how much they try to point these things out to you it never seems to get through
Since why would you think sebatians evil in anyway when hes the one that takes care of you? Meeting the needs of both you and your child so quickly without hesitation, obviously he loves you, the kids must just be overexaggerating, possibly still holding a grudge against their father for being the authority in the family 
Sebastians quick to fill in any doubts you might have for him, assuring you theyre just going through a phase while soothing your anxieties within affections.
Domestic life will seem more aggressive than Sebs ever expected due to his children always trying to convince you to stray away from him, but its nothing to worry about, he'll always make sure hes the one with the upper hand no matter what the situation might be, Sebastian isnt going to lose his darling to some brat after all
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numbaoneflaya · 3 years ago
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You can count on me to pull up with a thousand of questions sbdhdh. A3, A22, C5, D3, F3 for Jilly ; A18, A23, B9, C1, H2 for Nirn ; A5,B9, C8, D1, I5, for Thurwen ; A9, A13, C1, E8, and G6 for Valkya? 😏
A3, A22, C5, D3, F3 for Jilly ;
A3.Do they have any emotional or psychological conditions? Are they aware of it? Do they try to treat it?
Shawty got that stockholm syndrome in a way. She is…. Sometimes aware of it, though she wouldn't call it that any more. Maybe at first in the basement she was more aware, but now that she can come and go she thinks its a thing of the past. tries not to dwell on it. Kind of in a “well its literally not that bad its kind of fun its kind of romantic were just quirky <3” way, will get mad if someone insists she has stockholm or that the relationship is fucked. Will get enraged and upset on Vincent's behalf, probably cry and yell at you.
A22. Is your OC intended to be found generally attractive? Unattractive? Average? Is there a reason why?
I intended her to be fairly average, maybe kind of cute. It's generally the way she dresses/acts in public that draws attention, not her looks. I tend to make most of my ocs on the average scale besides a select few.
C5. Do your OC’s morals and rules of common decency go out the window when it comes to those they don’t like, or when it’s inconvenient? Aka, are their morals situational?
Good question…. Jillys morals are pretty simple- always be kind and nice, murder and hurting other people is bad, and you shouldnt lie. She sticks to those pretty strictly herself despite the situations she gets put in, often to her own detriment. But she doesn't always put a stop to those behaviors from the people she surrounds herself with, so she's sort of accomplice to bad acts of violence just by not snitching. So somewhat situational? She tries not to think about it.
D3. How comfortable are they with the idea of death?
Not comfortable! She hadn't seen a lot of it before her early twenties and was always sort of sheltered. dead fish are flushed down the toilet bcs they go to the ocean to live again, right? Thought cows and such all died of old age peacefully before they were made into burgers until she was like… twelve. 💀Won't kill mice and other critters despite her prey drive bcs she would feel too bad. And this is just for animal death, she's much more uncomfortable with human death. Also a thing she tries to ignore.
F3. Could they ever live in a “tiny home”?
God no. She hates small spaces unless she's hiding in them and tiny homes have no room for all the shit she stashes! No room for zoomies, or climbing on the furniture, or wrestling around on the floor. It would be filled with junk within a week.
A18, A23, B9, C1, H2 for Nirn ;
A18. Do they get jealous easily? Do they feel bad if they do?
He's never had much to be jealous of, as he's never really been over involved in romantic relationships. They were usually mutually beneficial and somewhat clinical in nature. Hes also pretty sure of himself and his value as an asset and lover. If he finds someone who peaks his interest and they become an item though, he might get jealous if he catches them flirting with other people. Hell be peeved at first but know flirtation in business has its value, so to make himself feel better might flirt with someone else while they are nearby. Make a game of it, see who wins.
A23. Does your OC place much importance on their appearance? Do they feel confident in it?
Appearances are crucial to him and spends a lot of time and money making sure he looks his best. He needs to appear above the rabble and impenetrable, dressing well and having immaculate posture and an air of both grace and otherworldliness.
B9. What kind of humor does your OC like the most? Slapstick, ironic, funny sounds, scare pranks, xD sO rAnDoM…
Definitely not one to find fart jokes funny. Very rarely laughs genuinely or full heartedly, he keeps all his expressions of emotion close to his chest. Sharp sardonic wit is appealing to him in the right circumstances, even a jab directed at himself can make him chuckle if it's well formed enough. Irony almost always gets him, even if its dark irony or gallows humor. Bit of a hard nut to crack. Would laugh enough that hed have to cover his mouth with his hand if he were to see Felix fall face first into mud, though. More often than not you can tell he finds something amusing by a gleam in his eyes and a slight squint.
C1. Does your OC have a moral code? If not, how do they base their actions? If so, where does it come from, and how seriously do they take it?
Well he used to have a real moral code :/. Now I mean…. The ends justify the means. By any means necessary. He considers his family's needs first, then the good of the world, then any individual in the world. Has ordered executions of entire families, had babies stolen and sent away, sent armies to certain death knowing full well they would all die, commanded individuals be tortured for information, sacrificed many in what he considers to be a game of chess where he is the player and others are the pawns. He finds senseless violence and savagery to be unforgivable, but if violence has a sense and purpose to employ it, then he will do so.
H2. Is your OC a thoughtful partner, in whatever aspect of that you want to cover?
Nirn tends to be a very thoughtful and attentive person in general, just for the wrong reasons lmaoooo. But with a lover? He's going to be utilizing that to show them how much he cares and using his powers for good. Mention you like a certain fabric while shopping one time and then complain your favorite tunic has a wine stain in it several months later, he's going to be taking your measurements for a new one in your preferred material without a moment's notice. Very keen on picking up moods, expressions and tone. Also has a very good memory. He doesn't really think about it but gifts are how he shows his love. Also a great attentive listener.
A5,B9, C8, D1, I5, for Thurwen ;
A5. Are they good at handling change in their life?
I would say so, yeah. Shes been used to things constantly changing since she was little and has had little to no control on outside influences. Shes also not one to over think about the past and lament, shes more of a one foot in front of the other, the only time is the present kind of gal. Of course large changes like becoming a warden were a bit more severe, but shes mostly able to think in the present as long as she has immediate problems to deal with.
B9.What kind of humor does your OC like the most? Slapstick, ironic, funny sounds, scare pranks, xD sO rAnDoM…
Slapstick is always gonna make her laugh as long as nobody gets seriously hurt, even if its her own ass tripping into a tree. Not a fan of scare pranks, 0/10 recommend trying to scare Thurwen. You will end up with a broken nose at best and an angry elf. Likes puns, but she's the one to groan at them and try and hide the grin spreading across her face. Gallows humor but only if its her in the gallows, otherwise doesn't find it funny at all. If a little kid calls someone a fartcicle she will be tears in the eyes giggling, which is hard when your warden commander and everyone looks toward you to be serious and mature gyshsdhdfsghsd.
C8. Is your OC more practical or ideal morally? I.e., do they hold people to high expectations of behavior even if it’s not realistic for the situation, or do they have a more realistic approach and adapt their morality to be more practical?
She definitely holds herself to moral ideals and is very hard on herself, but has realistic moral expectations for others. She can understand self serving and people only wanting to survive and she will only give people a little bit of shit for it, no one's perfect. But then she expects herself to be perfect and berates herself constantly for not living up to the hero of ferelden warden commander ideals.
D1. How religious is your OC? What do they practice, if anything? If they don’t associate with any religion, what do they think of religion in general?
Atheist ever since her mom died when she was a kid, but now Shes in a weird mixed state ever since the urn of sacred ashes where shes like. fuck the maker, but Andraste is cool I guess. So respects/believes in the power of Andraste while thinking the maker is a piece of shit and the chantry sucks ass. Even she doesnt know what she really believes, but she did see the ghosts of Andrastes disciples and Shartan, used her ashes as healing salve, killed an old god, etc. So shes been in a weird place recently, crisis of faith/non faith pretty continual.
I5. Are they a good cook?
I mean…. She can cook basics. Shes been feeding herself and the alienage kids since she was old enough to walk so she knows how to get protein and make things edible. Does it taste good? Probably not. She didnt see her first spice till she was 17 years old, but she can skin a rabbit in seven seconds.
LA9, A13, C1, E8, and G6 for Valkya? 😏
A9. Does your OC make a lot of excuses? For themselves? Others?
She tries to excuse bad behavior of herself or others a lot, yeah fgdgdsfhdhs. Mostly she doesnt have to make excuses for herself because she can wholeheartedly be like “yeah i fucked up but whatever im sexy and large and awesome and everyone loves me 🙄whatever baby” and when other people fuck up shes pretty sympathetic even though they are not as large nor as sexy. Shes very used to forgiving and excusing herself its totally alien to her when she really fucks up and is suddenly like wait… valkya…. Did bad?? What is this feeling. Shame?? Guilt?? IMPOSSIBLE.
A13. Does your OC have any phobias? If so, where did they come from?
She hates those giant bugs in morrowind and valenwood a whole fucking lot but I wouldnt exactly place it as a phobia. Those huge mosquitoes and haorvers got no respect but she really hates the morrowind bugs ever since they knocked her over and jumped her while she was pants down peeing drunk as hell in the sand :/ never forgave. Never forgot.
C1. Does your OC have a moral code? If not, how do they base their actions? If so, where does it come from, and how seriously do they take it?
She was raised in a healthy household that tought the basics, prety much “harming others needlessly, stealing, torture, rape, dessecrating the dead, being selfish and not doing right by others, etc etc all basic bad things” are her morals. Her morality is basically treat others how you want to be treated. And if they treat you badly, then have fun beating the shit out of them to show everyone else not to fuck with you. Its a pretty nordic morality in that way. Her morality is also since she was ‘blessed’ with being so large and strong, that she has to also look out for the little guy who cant protect themselves. So If someone treats them how valkya wouldn't want to be treated, then beat the shit out of the person harming them to show them the little guys got backup. Her parents raised her to be a hero and thats p much how she sees herself, which has its benefits and its fuckin problems.
E8. What’s one of your OC’s biggest regrets?
Fucking up Dem and Dariens relationship for sure dude :/ valkya always gonna be sulking over that one. She doesnt regret becoming a vestige, even though it would have made her so much happier not to be because it ended up saving so many people and the world. She regrets not spending more time with Naryu, regrets always having other life saving business she had to run off to, regrets not cherishing the time they had together. Regrets not telling Lyris how she feels, either. Regrets not being able to save as many people as she should have, regrets she wasnt stronger in coldharbor and didnt break out herself. But she tries not to think about it <3
G6. Do they have any favorite childhood memories?
When she was seven she once spent two months training to hold her breath underwater, because her cousin always held it longer and won the gold bet. She trained for hours almost drowning in the river until she could comfortably hold it for up to three minutes. During the next holiday when they all got together again the competitions were on and they both went under- her cousin won, holding their breath for four more minutes before they decided to come up. This was the first lesson she learned that shocked her world view- you always need to know your opponents capabilities. (after she lost 26 gold in the bets, her mother later had to inform her that her cousin was an argonian.)
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thespiantherepist · 4 years ago
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Android Iida x reader pt.2 SFW
Iida had been feeling weird lately. He'd been relaxing more. Charging, and rebooting himself constantly. He wanted himself to be in perfect condition for you. He started setting his food compartment up daily, judt so hed be able to eat with you. Sometimes when youd come home crying, or have bouts of sudden emotion he'd drop everything. He'd put his arm around you, and hum a lullaby.
And everytime.
Everytime.
Hed get that thrum.
That soft, and fast rotating within himself.
The circuts underneath his face would heat up lightly due to the stimulis. Causing his face to light up red.
"Iida, im taking you to the hospital."
"SCRREEECH!"
His glasses glared, even without lights shinig on them. He stayed firmly planted on the fridge. On the top of the fridge rather.
Why did you have to take him to the programmer's?
Because you would hear clanking coming from him at night.
A loud tink in the middle of the night. Hums, and whirrs would comw out louder than normal for an android.
"Listen Y/n, we could talk about this!" He sputtered quickly.
"Either come down, and let me take you, or youll have to evaluate yourself."
Iida shivered, he hated, absolutely dispised where his evaluation socket, and cord connected. It made him feel violated. Although, he wasnt sure if he could actually feel.
"W-ee dont need to do all that MY STAR!" He said, getting louder as you probed at him with the stick of your broom.
"WHY DONT WE GO TO THE MOVIES OR THE ICE SKATING RINK INSTEAD!"
You glared at him. Then you started counting.
"Programms, set countdown forbtotal system reset. In 10, 9, 8, 7, 6..."
"My star?" Iida said scared, and confused. He felt his servos, and codes getting the programm ready, and it was then he realised what was happening.
Iida knew what he was feeling. He couldnt deny the reasons any longer. He knew he loved you. When he shut down for the night his systems warmed bringing back data from his memories of you.
He panicked.
"NOW NOW LETS NOT GET BRASH MY STAR!"
"...5."
"y/n. Theres." "4." "Theres nothing, wrong with me, its just." "3."
OOOH God he could feel everything in his body being strangled, and the humidity recyclers in his eyes started leaking his face scrunching.
"2."
"Y/N what I mean to say was!"
"1."
"I LOVE YOU, DAMNIT, THATS WHY MY SYSTEMS ARE LOUD. IT TAKES A LOT OF EFFORT TO PULL STORED DATA. BUT MY BODY WORKS HARD TO FIX IT. TO KEEP ME COOL!" He started sobbing, still crouched on the fridge. "I understand why you'd want to leave me. Or just reset me now." He said chocking on his tears. Trying to calm himself down.
"Cancel reset protocol, Iida baby come down here." You said it softly, a command, but a light one.
He gently came down, he felt much better.
"Mast-" You roughly threw your hands around hia neck, bringing him in for a kiss. Entangling your hands through his hair.
He was shocked.
You.
kissed.
HIM!
His servos damn near exploded.
"But Im."
You put a finger up to shush him.
"Youre more human than anyone I will probably ever know. I love you soo much!"
He grinned broadly, then started crying happily into your shoulder. Leaning down. Wrapping his arms around your waist.
"My Star?"
"Only yours."
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irameii · 4 years ago
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HEATHER:||: ERIC
Warnings:|| one sided love
Summary: I wish I was her....
A laugh rings throughout the air. One so familiar, you cant help but smiling automatically at the sound. His presence, one that illuminates wherever he goes. Slowly turning around, there he is ,your best friend.
There it is , a smile, a gesture so simple yet it causes a million butterflies to flutter within you and causes your mind to go fuzzy. Its like he doesn't know his own charm or the control he has over you, but no one knows. No one knows the feelings you carry within.
(Idkh these pov thingys work yet sorryy)
Eric: y/n!!!!!!. Eric yells as he jogs closer, and grabs y/n's shoulder y/n: yes Eric?* deep breath* Eric: did you do the homework for math class? * Breathe* y/n: Yeah I did.I actually finished it before class ended yesterday. Eric: you're gonna let me see it right??? *heart beating gets louder* Take a step back Y/n : nope. You should've done it. *starts walking down the hall* Thinking he's wandered off you let out a deep sigh... Knowing if you let him beg enough youd cave in and you knew better. He would never learn this way.and soon enough you could see yourself falling farther and farther into his grasp over time and he didnt even know it. You let out one more sigh before turning around to see Kevin , who cant help but look at you concerned. Kevin: whats wrong y/n?
.. You avoid eye contact. Kevin is one of those people. Someone who can tell when someones upset. He can read you well. So you knew you had to leave quickly. Y/n: I didnt get much sleep last night. So I'm feeling quite off today, its nothing serious. *nervous laughter*
He seems to kind of believe it since he just nods his head as if he can see it apparent on your face.. But something feels off, like he's pretending to believe you for your sake but you just excuse yourself and head towards the bathroom.Totally unaware he hasnt stopped looking your way since turning around as he nods to himself again as if comfirming somthing to himself before turing to head to his own class.
Y/n Pov
*splash*
*in a quiet voice* 'Whats wrong with me..'.. Its like the moment I look at him I cant help it. My heart begins to race, my stomach ends up feeling funny like there are millions of butterflies, and I get nervous and run away each time he gets closer... *Looks back at self in mirror* only if he knew...
(5 min later.)
*sigh* *walks towards math*
Other POV
You sit down before class begins , and there it is again , his laughter, but this time its different. You cant help but turn around to see whats caused the change in his voice, and its like your throat gets caught. Her. The girl he always is talking to you about.It seems like he was finally able to build the courage to talk to her. The one he wants to take to the movies to see his favorite movies with. The one he wants to show his safe places to . The one who keeps him up at night. The one he wants to wear matching clothes with. The one he wants to spend his holidays with. Her. Its her. Guess he didn't need the homework anymore afterall.
You quickly turn back around , trying to keep your emotions in. You feel yourself go colder with each sound. A tightening feeling in your chest builds everytime you hear them laughing . You sigh and breathe in slowly , praying the class ends quickly .
The moment class ended you jolt up quckly and grab your things and head towards your locker for the next class.
Y/n Pov
*sigh* *grabs snack for break*
Eric:y/n!!!
I dont respond.
Eric:y/n? Whats wrong .*looks concerned*
There he goes again.
Nothing Eric i say. He looks in disbelief. Knowing theres something off.
Eric: hmmm.You sure sure?. Hmm Well lets go with the rest of the guys. They are waiting for us for sure. *wraps arm around shoulder*
It was like a sudden new reflex. I didnt mean to. But jerking away from him seemed like the only thing that my body felt like I should do...
The look of surprise on his face made me feel embarrassed I reacted that way. And as soon as it looked like he was going to ask me what was wrong again I speed down the hall.
And there I meet the rest of the guys , thankfully.
New: thank goodness you're here. Look help me out. Changmin keeps saying this chucky doll here is cute... Come get him .
I cant help but laugh. I take a seat next to Sangyeons right side while Juyeon is on my left.
Juyeon looks towards me as i sit and smiles that crescent moon kind of smile. Of course i return it .
Y/n: I dont know about chucky being cute. But his bride is quite a beauty tho.
New:..... You... You two are something else with your horror movies... Like... You know what, forget it. *laughs in defeat.*
Y/n: *dramatic gasps* my oh my you say that like WE'RE the weird ones.🙄👀
Sunwoo and Q: periodt👀👏
Eric finally arrives.
Eric: Guys!! Guess what?
Sunwoo: you did your math homework for once?
Eric:.... Mm well Uh no, i didnt
Sangyeon: you didnt ask y/n for the answers this time?
Eric: no i did, but she said no. I got it from. H/n (her name)
Hyunjae: so thats what it is. You spoke to her?
*breathe*
Eric: yes and guys, like, I think I've maybe got a chance.
There he goes again... Her. Its all her. JUST her...
Jacob: so did you ask her out?
Eric: yeah I did. I invited her to our movie night tonight. I was gonna ask you guys if you guys were cool with it beforehand but I didnt think I would must the courage to.
Juyeon: anything for you to get the girl. We got you
New: IF he gets her. She just doesnt know the headache she's in for.
Sangyeon: Guess all that practice on y/n was worth it.
Practice...
Thats all I was....
He says it smiling towards me , not knowing the hurt his words have just caused subconsciously but I cant smile. Not even a forced one. I just pretend I didnt heard him.
Eric: yeah she told me she actually thought I was dating y/n but of course I could never. We're like siblings.
Ouch...
New: true...
Q: I dont even think eric is y/n's type anyways
I make eye contact with someone who seems to have been watching my every move.
Kevin...
He looks like he is observing everything... From my reactions to my responses.After another 3 seconds he looks away.Not saying a word either.
Everyones laughing. Everyones congratulating him.
Younghoon:y/n?
Everyone turns to face me.oh .
Y/n: hm?
I was too lost in thought. I spaced out.
Sangyeon: What time are you coming by?
Y/n: for what?
Sunwoo: for the movie. We gotta all be Eric's wingman here. He needs all the help we can offer.
Oh.. She will be there too? Can I handle it? Yes? No? No I cant handle it
Y/n: Uh i cant . I have something that just came up. I just remembered.
I lied. And sure enough. I was seen through.
Eric: like what?
Y/n: something
Q: really? What is it? Maybe we can help you out so you can come by and hang out.
Something is snapping within me. I need to leave.
Y/n: no thanks. You guys have fun.
I get up before they give me a response. I cant be around them . not until i get over these feelings. But its harder than i thought. But i dont want to take it out on them either so I should try.
Everytime We'd see each other after that. It was HER. It was either him with her or about her.
Everytime in class, itd be HER.
Every text , HER.
And the guys went along with it.
And everytime , itd hurt. A punch to the heart. And a bit tighter it would feel each time.
And the constant reminder that its just HER and will always be HER..
only if he knew.. I wish I was her.... its like the way he'd talk about her was like he was telling you the reason for his existence, the way his eyes shined when hed see her and then theyd soften when she'd smile at him,the smile he'd have when hed describe her or simply talk about her and trust me he was always proud to, or the way he tried to contain his happiness when she'd come around to speak to him just showed me all i needed to know.
He loved her. She made him happy . Thats all that mattered.
I felt one of those sad smiles form. Because though he was happy . I was not. I dont want to be reminded its not me constantly..so with thaat thought. I call it quits. Until I no longer feel this feeling. I'll distance myself so I can let go properly and move on with time.
I suddenly stopped responding to the gc messages. Slowly started to decline to hang out. But it seems it wasn't a big deal though. She was there eveytime instead.She became apart of everything they did. And with that I started to spend all my time in the library as a way to naturally distance myself. The guys were worried at first. But once i told them I needed perfect scores to get into my dream college, they decided me spending most of my time in the library for it was alright. It was for my other "dream college" so I should put it first they said. For my future they said.And then they also suddenly stopped asking me to hang out.It didnt take long.They also suddenly stopped directing messages towards me in the gc. Personal messages as well. Slowly one by one. We stopped having things to talk about ,like we've become strangers with time.. Now to just glances every now and then, that was all. Other than that, we became just like strangers. Strangers with memories....
Suddenly..
Kevin: y/n...
*Distant laughter*
I turn to look at Kevin.Sensing he had something to say but it wouldnt come out. He looks towards the table and I follow his gaze towards the table full of boys with her in it. I can only smile. I smile when they errupt with laughter at something new and sunwoo said. Happy they're happy. And with that I turn back to Kevin.
I can only smile at Kevin. No words. Just a smile.
The look on his face says he has something to say still present.
For the past 6 months. He would have that same look on his face when I'd walk past him. But hes never actually stopped me.
Kevin: y/n...
And just like that . Suddenly I'm wrapped in a warmth I didnt think I missed. And it's like it went quiet..and the sound of sniffling fills my ears , and his hold gets tighter. Oh Kevin..
THE END.
Authors note: Maybe I can male a Pt2? This one turned out bad tbh .
I did not edit this but i will later onnnn thank youuuuuu
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alexandria-morrowgrove · 4 years ago
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Healing.
Night fell and with it came the conclusion of another day. Another day in Stormwind dealing with the chaos the capital brought to the job Alex performed. Within two days of coming back to work after that bomb she’d been involved in yet another explosion. Another man seeking to avoid justice had taken a child hostage. When that failed to stop those chasing him for the refugee killings he’d committed the man revealed he was armed with powerful grenades, Alex was able to thank the holy man that managed to contain a majority of the blast in a bubble of Light.
Morrowgrove however had charged in blindly to save that child, hoisting it up and cradling it in her arms. A tiny Draenei who couldn’t speak she’d been so afraid. One safely returned to her parents at the cost of Morrowgrove’s hind legs feeling broken cobblestone and debris lodged in the lower portions of her knees and calves. The man with explosives had achieved his goal, he avoided authorities by...moving on into the next life sooner then the courts would’ve allowed it. The dead taken by his hand had their Justice now in the afterlife.
It was thoughts like these even now that kept the aging worgen thinking. Endlessly stressed and worried, nightmare ridden. She’d begun to work on it all, emotions, her feelings, meeting new people and making new friends. Alex despite her paranoia had been going out more, mingling more. She often worried this would result in more injury as it had in times past, the contract killers and hired on hands to take her on flashes through her mind as reminders of the dangers posed each time she left home or her office. At some point a diary was recommended but a diary was never something she’d write, not with the work she did.
Alex took a look now at her legs, the wounds all but tiny bruises from the grenades. Her back sore but functional from the bomb. Magic was the only reason she came back so soon, it was magic that kept her around now. Her mind often wandered now, drifting to the recent friends she’d made. One new another found, it’d been years since she’d last seen the proud elven ranger she’d met like most others. Through her work. For now she stood in her garden, watering her plants at home. Few pushed into the Captain’s hobbies, even fewer knew enough beyond the vast list of conflicts and injuries endured that she’d been a simple farmer’s daughter.
Plants were tended to, kept safe and healthy under her roof. Her plants were like her children, each blossom made her proud for the work done to aid in their growth. The summer heat proved a challenge for the delicate herbs grown with care. Perhaps her new friend had a good idea constantly mentioning corn. It was resilient enough to withstand the heat of the kingdoms summers. Though misguided in thinking she’s a corn witch. ‘It’s not what a harvest witch is about. It’s more then corn.’ She was almost confident that man would never change his title for her, in truth? That was fine. She returned the favor by calling this elite soldier and Ranger ‘The food Ranger.’
Her mind often drifted back to the elven ranger from years ago. In a time where she was deployed shortly after, Argus. Never again did she think it possible to encounter that man again or anyone related to him. Yet when she emerged from her garden there he was, humming along as he made a lunchbox for her to have the next day at work. Why? Alex often asked herself, whered he come from after a few years? They’d found one another and reconnected so seamlessly. A kind man that held no malice, no ill intent in his attempts to take her out.
On a date not the murderous way.
He’d been right there for her bomb recovery, without question hed offered and spoken fondly to take things at whatever pace they both needed to be proper. To be happy. Happy. A word that when said out loud seemed almost foreign to Alex. Yet here she was, attempting again the hand of fate when it came to matters of the heart. In therapy and through conversation she’d taken time to allow her heart to mend. In order to be open to others and feel free to speak she’d focused on herself, seeking a form of peace within. This wasn’t going to be a quick journey, she knew that. But there was hope yet, hope in watching others like the food ranger with his singing pigeons, hope in the children she’d saved, hope in the refugees she’d offered peace to by stopping a killer, and even hope in her unit, seeing those like Terran with his life progressing, Keith with his young child; Caspar getting to be grown up and enjoying adulthood at its finest.
She realized through self work and years of grief...she couldn’t do this alone. Life alone was unbearable, painful. It’d taken so much pain to reach the breaking point and now? The day came to a close, she curled up in her comfortable bed and allowed the world of sleep to take her. Not without the final piece of the puzzle however. It didn’t take long for arms she welcomed to hold her, the couple able to cuddle and dote on one another in silence. This was new, but this was moving forward. Alex allowed herself to heal. Others had begun to notice at work too, the comments made they were happy to see she’s happy.
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For once she agreed, though she’d never say it. She wouldn’t jinx something so new. Alex was funny like that, fearful of jinxing something by saying simple words. Right now however she’d drift off, safe and warm. Work would always be chaotic she knew that, but this? Her home? She’d do all she could to keep her home life stable and secure. Welcoming anyone into it was a challenge if only for brief visits. This was healing, this had to be right? She prayed in her sleep the spirits had granted her pain some reprieve and that with work this was the dawn of a new chapter.
Or this is her midlife crisis! Who knows? Either way she’d found joy. She’d hold onto it as long as she could.
( @terranlloyd @caspar-stamp @rangerhummus @the-elderarrow and @ssgtjohnston for mentions. Hope y’all enjoy! :3 )
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losangelesvalorant · 5 years ago
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interesting things from tactical crouch’s interview w fusion assistant coach chrisTFer on 1/21
christfer talks abt hero bans, why fusion underperformed in s2, and why their roster is what it is. ill update this post w the youtube link once its out
On hero bans
Christfer thinks hero bans would change EVERYTHING, every team would have to be able to think on the fly, strong ingame leadership, makes coaches' jobs a lot harder, have to practice every hero on every map. you'd have to coach fundamentals into players a lot more and more focus on quickly IDing win conditions and the enemy gameplan. very seriously hopes they aren't gonna drop it this season
if the goal is to have genuine diversity in hero pool, bans is the way to achieve that, but christfer thinks itll fuck up the competitiveness, level of play will go down. but any aspect that helps spectators is better for league overall
volamel thinks hero bans will excite and drive the audience bc banning players specific heroes would be hype as fuck. lotta strategy, lots of analysis. however he's skeptical bc if it happens midseason it's gonna fuck over coaches
christfer thinks if theyre gonna do it they gotta do it today. there's no other good time
yiska thinks it would be bad to implement it midseason bc the # of games teams play across the season is sooo spread out. teams have different amts of games every month
on why fusion underperformed in s2
Internally, fusion was kinda "naive" coming into s2, thought they were the 2nd best team and acted as if they were 2nd best. rarely felt happiness after scrims bc theyre "supposed" to be winning all the scrims. losing scrims also was hugely negative for the same reason
smaller roster makes it harder to kick people into gear, so lack of motivation was a big thing. they were just waiting for goats to die
thought goats wouldnt continue into s2, stage 4 was where they finally got motivation, fusion never completely understood the goats style of play or the fundamentals goats taught teams, they lost games they shouldnt have as a result. Not one big issue, lots of small issues
fusion held themselves to such high expectations that when they failed them and weren't enjoying the game as much so morale fell. (paraphrased) "as long as my players enjoy playing the game, it makes my job easier"
Christfer says fusion changed a lot for playins, changed coaching structure, overwhelmingly positive result. best theyd looked all season
shanghai had very particular strengths on certain maps. fusion was winning brawl comps vs brawl comps. got nervous and dropped maps they were supposed to take, but theyd given away too many of "their" maps to be able to lose shanghai's maps. 
felt like they hit the ground running on playins, but other teams levelled up across playins and christfer believed other teams wouldve developed more than they would have
even if coaching wasnt problem if team is in a slump you need new coaches to re-fire everyone up, which is what happened w fusion. 
on carpe and sado
carpe was able to play heroes he excelled at in s1, in s2 zarya was entirely different in elements of what makes a player good at the hero. carpe holds himself to a very, very high standard and playing zarya killed his morale because he wasn't so good at it. christfer considers it a failing of himself as a coach that he didn't help carpe work through that more
nobody on the team is worried about carpe’s performance. Christfer confirmed carpe wont play if he isnt up to standard (in response to reddit worrying abt how long his contract is and how much sway he has over coaches)
christfer is very upset about how people treat sado. sado is the "single nicest person you will ever meet." every single player/coach had 1 on 1s with tucker, everyone said they wanted to keep playing with sado. yiska emphasized how important it is that every player on the team wanted to keep playing sado bc for example eqo and carpe want to win more than anything and if they thought sado was the problem they absolutely wouldve said so
Other teams came to fusion wanting to sign sado
christfer said sado wasnt the greatest main tank player last year, but playing rein in a "dysfunctional" team makes the rein player look bad. 
christfer thinks this is the "season of sado." has complete faith in him
the complaints abt sado’s rein "[he] can understand," says to remember sado had never played pro before s1. he doesn't have as much competitive exp which hits him hard but he's grown wildly in the last year. 
sado's ability to hit every halt at the right time is incredible. compares him to alarm in how good his instincts are. excellent player in a team environment, kinda a big brother to some of the players on the team, sado is very important to the team
christfer agrees that if meta shifts and sado is sick, theres a problem, but says this is not a problem unique to fusion
on fusion’s new acquisitions
heesu surprised christfer the most. he’s “very, very, very very, very good.” hungry to learn, easy to talk to, they got a very good deal and christfer is surprised more teams didn't try to get him
heesu has a lot of respect for carpe, heesu said its a + for him to work under carpe
theyre trying to scrim w heesu daily, sounds like they intend to play him if the opportunity presents itself. excellent signing theyre very happy abt
the point of the chipsa signing was that they didnt need a 5th dps, their lineup is already perfect, they had to find someone that "made sense" from many levels. wanted a specialist. Christfer thinks chipsa understands the raw mechanics of doom better than any owl players, thinks he could legit play in a doom meta. also thinks chipsa could teach eqo doom in a doom meta. chipsa provides advertisement, no need for scrimming with him. if the situation is right he can play and if he's not playing he provides income, publicity, etc. christfer again restated he was originally against the signing. when tucker explained why hed be signed, christfer came around to the idea
having 2 way players is a headache in christfers opinion, so that was another reason why they didnt pick up a contenders player instead of chipsa.
chipsa has not had a scrim yet because he’s not in philly bc visa stuff, but christfer did not clarify whether or not he will scrim. 
of all players signed, funnyastro was by far the most in demand. they had to fight for him, almost every team wanted him. he's a "sponge" where he remembers whatever coaches tell him, incredibly coachable, very mature for his age, needs to adjust his playstyle a bit to fit into the team (bc he's going for plays he shouldnt sometimes) but if they can "tune him back" a bit hes great. want to find a middle ground bc astro's ability to kill everything and doing his job (brought up moth as the "glue guy" who enables everyone by doing his job perfectly)
alarm has insane awareness, has natural affinity for positioning, understands ovw instinctively. zero attitude issues, the nicest/perfect teammate. "the whole package."
yiska said ivy has a "special type of character," quickly clarified that it’s not a “problematic” character, but needs a dif type of coaching (christfer agreed)
thinks things got difficult for ivy on toronto bc he was moving roles so much, kdg puts a lot of stock into him, a lot of kr players do too. people from toronto think ivy is insane mechanically. volamel thinks ivy should have been toronto's standout
fury wasnt signed bc of bad synergy btween sado and poko. poko wasnt the problem. fusion is very serious abt winning everything and fury is a statement of that intent. fury/poko cover every base
on new coaches
Christfer really respects seita and kdg, happy to have gotten them. has worked w both of them in the past, considers kdg similar to crusty. they signed kdg like the second he became available, christfer asked for him specifically. 
seita will stay remote 
yiska says mobydik is nuts in terms of game knowledge. Christfer agreed, says he thinks abt the game in a very unique way, outside of the box
misc
Fusion has a system where all 3 supports are rotating in the current meta. nobody is benched. had main support play bap originally when bootcamping, but theres places u can play 2 flex sups, so fusion has a lot of flexibility. who plays depends on situations where you can always play zen/bap vs where you might have to flex to lucio
Christfer thinks main sups doing calling/single caller system is a bit outdated and more of a western concept, trying to build comm system where everyone communicates, everyone calls their own ults. can have ingame leaders, but wants everyone to call what they need to call. in this meta everyone has to make the plays and call their own ults bc its split second and only the person w the ult can see the optimal situation
Christfer thinks the positions where you need stability in ovw is main tank and main support. subbing dps players in and out is fine but you need consistency at mt and ms. 
really really think they dont need to fill their last roster spot
Christfer calls this season a "rebuild season" for fusion. if they dont do well this year christfer thinks it would be the fault of the coaches. too much talent to fuck it up. 
not taking home a title is not exactly a failure, but anything within the top 4 fusion is happy with
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katzuyas · 6 years ago
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blood drips from the fingers of the hand that suddenly rips through the flesh of the man who was bout to cut yuuri’s head off with one clean swing of his sword, and yuuri can’t exactly say he minds this sudden development. there is a clean hole in the man’s chest when he’s discarded to the side like a piece of insignificant dust, but yuuri’s too busy gazing at the one who saved him to look closer at all the gore.
because before him stands the most handsome man he’s ever seen.
it’s part admiration, part disgust that stirs in yuuri’s belly as he watches the man lift his bloodied hand to his lips and suck his fingers clean. something very disturbing seems to be happening before his very eyes, and yet... and yet, yuuri feels himself bewitched to the point of staying there and watching.
“did I scare you?” the man asks, licking his hand clean much like a cat. a hell cat. one of those feral beasts that feast on rotten flesh and--
“um,” yuuri swallows. “no?”
he’s risking it, he thinks, but when he considers it closer, it’s not really a lie that he gives in reply. he’s only partially scared. everyone would be after someone tried to kill them, and yuuri’s fear stems from that alone, it looks like. 
“oh?” the man cocks his head to the side. he looks at yuuri with bright blue eyes, which shine like gems and steal yuuri’s breath altogether. “so you aren’t scared of me?”
“should I be?” yuuri asks back, wondering where he gets the audacity to question a being who can rip through a human with enough ease as he just witnessed.
maybe it’s his close brush with death that’s given him the courage, or maybe it’s another feeling -- one of premonition of what’s to come -- that tells him his adventure into the land of the dead might not yet be far off, but yuuri finds strength in his limbs and lightness in his heart, so he stands.
and he looks the man in the eyes with no fear. “are you going to hurt me?”
the man seems to be as surprised at yuuri’s question as yuuri is at his own daring.
“hurt you? no!” he shakes his head and his silver hair flits about like spiderwebs on a light morning breeze. “why would you even think that? I’d never hurt you.”
“well,” yuuri clears his throat, looking to where the corpse of the man who tried to take his life has yet to chill. “that might have something to do with my question, but... if you aren’t here to hurt me... and you just saved me... then, how-- I mean, who are you? and why did you help me?”
the little breath that escapes from the man’s lips is much more hushed than a gasp. much more... disappointed, yuuri decides when he sees the crestfallen look on the man’s face.
“you don’t know,” comes the reply, and yuuri frowns.
of course he doesn’t? how could he--
“you called for me.”
“what?” yuuri blinks, surprised. “no, I didn’t. I would’ve known if--”
“but you did,” the man insists. “I wouldn’t be here otherwise. you called me, or, well, your soul did? when humans come close to death their souls resonate, you see, and some of you have the strength to call one of us.”
humans, yuuri’s mind repeats as it reels. one of us.
“who... who are you?” he repeats through trembling lips.
the man’s smile is a slow thing, and it’s beautiful. it’s beautiful, but all of his handsome face is. it’s in his eyes that the beauty ends, or maybe, maybe that’s where it truly begins, because his blue gaze glows with power that is darker than any yuuri has seen.
he shivers when the man steps up to him, almost jumps in unease when he kneels. yuuri’s hand is taken and brought up to those smiling lips. there’s blood stains on his skin now, too, from the leftovers of his almost-killer, and yuuri’s stomach turns when he feels a kiss pressed to the inner part of his wrist -- right where his pulse flutters like a bird trapped in a cage against its will.
“I am nothing but your loyal dog, my liege,” the man whispers.
his warm breath settles in the palm of yuuri’s hand, distracting, but not distracting enough.
“my what?” yuuri asks. his voice comes out broken, so he clears his throat, and says again: “I don’t understand. how...?”
“you called upon me,” the man explains. “and I answered your call. I am now yours to command until the day you inevitably die.”
“but I didn’t,” yuuri insists, this time harder. he shakes his head. “I couldn’t have.”
“whyever not?”
the man peers up at him. he looks so perfectly poised while he continues to kneel at yuuri’s feet that yuuri trembles within himself from how beautiful it makes him. he knows he shouldn’t, but... he was already set to die tonight and he didn’t. so maybe luck was on his side, after all. maybe... maybe enough of it to let him get away with even more.
he slips his hand away from the light grasp and bows over until he can take the man’s face in his hands and set their foreheads together in faux gentleness. and he knows it instantly when the man realizes the change in the atmosphere around them, for those brilliant blue eyes widen in surprise that is heavily meshed with awe -- the awe that somehow makes yuuri feel powerful, more so than usual.
powerful, and stupid.
it’s that feeling that makes his brown eyes glow red, and it’s that feeling, too, which has him give the silky whisper of truth that only sparse few have ever heard:
“because I have no soul to call you.”
the man’s breath comes fast and hard, but he hears the truth in yuuri’s words, sees it in his inhuman eyes. gently, he turns his head towards the corpse of what must have been his intended master, the one that called him and the one he should’ve served, and yuuri lets him. he lets go.
“oh dear,” the man says, yet his voice does not indicate much upset about the way things have turned out. “I guess... I made a mistake? now that is no fun. I will need to head back to hell then...”
he stands up, but... he doesn’t look like he’s in a hurry. in fact, he looks as if he wishes for a reason to stay. something to keep him here...
“before you go,” yuuri says before he thinks twice about it. “thank you for saving me. I would have died if he succeeded, so whatever trouble you’re in because of that, I feel like I should help you. so if you, well, that is, there is little I can do, but if you need a place to stay or to lie low for a while--”
“really?” the man blinks, and then breaks out into a smile so dazzling that yuuri feels the urge to shield his eyes. “could I stay with you then? I’m in no hurry to return, honestly. it’s so... dreary down there, you know.”
“but won’t you be in trouble if you don’t, I don’t know, report this? at least?”
the man shrugs. “they probably already know. besides, I’m glad I did what I did. I’d rather serve you than that pile of--”
“you don’t even know me,” yuuri tells him, a little amused, but mostly just too surprised at the turn of events to be fearful.
“but I’d like to know you,” the man replies easily. as easily as he slides up to him. as easily as he takes yuuri’s hand again, and as easily as he wraps his arm around yuuri’s waist almost in a parody of a dancing stance. “I’d very much like to know you... all of you.”
blood rushes to yuuri’s cheeks like it never has before, but even though the night is dark, he’s sure that this man can see it. he’s standing so close that he must, and yuuri knows it when he takes in the smile on his lips: a quirked, playful little thing that brings even more heat to yuuri’s face.
“how can I make a decision like that if you refuse to answer any of my questions,” yuuri says, but his protest is a feeble one. he already knows that he will not be able to resist this man’s charms. not now, not ever, most likely.
“then ask again, and I shall give you whatever it is you wish for.”
the man brings yuuri’s hand to his lips again, but this time he chooses to rest a kiss on yuuri’s knuckles instead of his wrist. if possible, it seems even more intimate than before, and yuuri’s heart beats double inside his chest.
“your name first,” he asks, unable to lift his eyes from where the man holds his hand in a grasp that is far gentler than yuuri would imagine. “and, who are you?”
“victor,” the man breathes. “my name is victor. and I’m a hellhound who answers the call of a human soul ready for eternal damnation. but, for you, I will be whoever you wish me to be--”
yuuri shakes his head as he looks up, right into his eyes. “no. you are who you are, and you will be who you decide to be. I have no right to change that, or ask it of you.”
victor’s surprise is clear, surely he hasn’t expected this. something in yuuri softens at the sight and it’s that same something that chooses to rest his trust in this man -- in victor -- whom he only just met, but whom he feels like he was supposed to meet all along.
“I’m yuuri,” yuuri says, and smiles when victor’s eyes meet his again. “yuuri of the katsuki clan. and I’m a vessel of the the squid god of hasetsu bay. my soul has already been claimed, but, with what little of myself there is left, I am pleased to make your acquaintance, victor.”
“oh, I assure you, yuuri,” victor chirps, sweet and playful, “the pleasure is all mine.”
he kisses yuuri’s hand again, yet this time his lips linger on yuuri’s skin just a bit longer while silver eyelashes flutter as victor closes his eyes. he breathes in deep, which makes yuuri flush all over again.
he quickly realizes why victor has done it, though. he’s a hellhound. he must have been familiarizing himself with yuuri’s scent, so that he could recognize it among the many others. and yet, once he figures it out, yuuri’s blush doesn’t go away. it only deepens, and deepens still when victor peers up at him with a gaze that is far more smitten than yuuri could ever hope it to be.
“you... um,” he bites his tongue from how fast he wants to speak, and needs to look away as embarrassment churns in his throat. yet, looking away from victor is harder than anything he’d ever done, and yuuri soon finds himself glancing his way again. “you said,” he tries again, “you said that you’d like to stay here, yes? if you still do, then my parents have an inn not far from here. we all live there, so if you--”
“I’d be honoured,” victor confesses, voice and eyes soft.
and yuuri, as he leads him by the hand which victor refuses to let go of, cannot deny that his heart feels oddly soft as well.
he was meant to die this night, but instead he has found himself with this strange man, who makes him feel strange things, and strangest of all? he has found himself trusting him, caring for him, and... before the cherry blossoms sprout their petals as spring takes her first steps, he finds himself loving him -- a hellhound from hell, who appeared in his life bloody, and who made all the blood in yuuri’s body run that much faster.
a hellhoud, a man, who showed him that even without a soul life has enough to offer to live, to love, and to be loved.
the hellhound, the man, whom yuuri has given what little of his was left to give: his heart.
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saxxxology · 6 years ago
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BITTEN - Ch.4
After getting bitten by a werewolf, Sam finds himself trying to adapt to a brand new lifestyle that brings him closer to the girl he loves, but threatens to tear him apart from his family for good.
PAIRING: Alpha!Sam x Omega!Reader
WORD COUNT: ~2200
WARNINGS: non-consensual werewolf bite (not sexual), a/b/o dynamics: heat/rut, knotting, claiming, breeding kink, angst, time hop (season 9 to 12), and more.
NOTE: Edited by @kayteonline and @kittenofdoomage - please heed all warnings and enjoy! This is NOT intended to be a dark fic, but if you read something that bothers you, it is your responsibility to stop reading, keep scrolling past it, or contact me for content clarification.
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Dean was in the kitchen when you walked up. He was cradling a large cup of coffee in one hand, and when he saw you emerge from the basement, his gaze fixed on you.
“How is he?” he asked urgently, “is he okay?”
You nodded. “It’s over. He’s fine, just hungry. Where’s Garth?”
“He went out with Bess. She’s in shock over what happened, so he took her to a safehouse out of state.” Dean watched as you pulled a pan from the rack on the wall and set it on the stove. “What do you mean by ‘fine?’”
“He’s not in pain anymore, his fever went down.” You cracked eggs into a bowl and whisked them around. “He just needs to recuperate for a few days, maybe a week.”
“Can I see him?” Dean asked.
You nodded and pulled a couple bagged chicken hearts from the fridge. “After he’s eaten. He’s gonna be stronger than normal for a while, so we gotta keep his human contact minimal.” You heard Dean exhale heavily as you started chopping the hearts into chunks. “Dean, I know you wanted to find a cure, but there’s nothing you could have done. I’ve seen people get bit and go through a lot worse. At least he’s alive. He’s a little different than he was yesterday, but he’s alive.”
Dean nodded and leaned against the counter. “You’re really intent on taking care of him, huh?”
“It’s my job to take care of my pack.” You replied, pulling four sausages from the fridge and tossing them in the pan, along with an entire pack of bacon. “Russ and Joba are gone. The Reverend’s… well, let’s just say I’m in charge of the pack, now. I care for Sam, deeply. If it were up to me I would have killed Joy myself so that didn’t happen.”
You heard Dean scoff, but when you looked at him you could see he was grinning.
“What?”
“Nothing.” Dean finished his beer and set the empty bottle on the counter. “Just… I never thought you’d actually spook over a guy getting turned.”
You shrugged. “I know when to care about someone getting bit. I wanted Sam to leave, I wanted him to forget about me, about the pack. I never wanted him to get bit.”
Dean nodded shortly. “The way I look at it now is, he could have been bitten and left to die. At least this way he’s got you and Garth and Bess to look after him, make sure he won’t get into trouble.”
You finished cooking in silence. Piling most of what you’d cooked onto a large plate, you slid one of the sausage links, a small pile of eggs, and several strips of bacon on a separate one, which you offered Dean. He accepted it gratefully, noting that you’d cooked the chicken hearts in  a separate pan. When you re-entered the basement, you found Sam sitting up and stretching his arms above his head.
“I could smell that from down here,” he muttered, turning his head to look at you, “is that normal?”
You handed him the plate and watched him begin to devour the food, shoveling a mixture of everything into his mouth with a fork that seemed comically small in his large hands. “Yeah, it’s pretty normal. And don’t worry about eating everything there, your appetite’s going to be pretty out there for the next couple days.”
Within minutes, Sam had completely annihilated the food on the plate. He tilted his head back against the wall, his lips parted as he sighed in satisfaction. “There was a heart in there, wasn’t there?”
“Two. Small ones, just chicken, nothin’ special.” You took the plate from him and set it down on the floor before snuggling into him. “How do you feel?”
Sam exhaled heavily and slipped an arm around your shoulders. “Not hungry anymore, definitely not tired… I feel strong. Stronger than before.” He flexed his arms, examining the muscles that bulged under the gray sleepshirt. He seemed bigger. “Actually, I feel like I need to run, get out…”
“There’s the punching bag.” You gestured to the slightly misshapen tool in the corner. “I can’t let you out yet, gotta know you can control yourself around humans.”
“Humans…” Sam looked down at his lap and swallowed. “That’s right, I’m not human anymore.”
You shook your head. “That’s not entirely true. You’re still human here,” you put a hand over his heart. “You’ll still be able to function like a human, your instincts are just rewired a bit, that’s all.”
Sam scoffed. “Yeah, what happens when I wolf out and go nuts?”
“That won’t happen.” You nuzzled his shoulder and stood with him as he shuffled over to the punching bag. He gave it an experimental nudge with his fist. “Want to see Dean?”
He nodded apprehensively. “Yeah, but I don’t wanna try to hurt him.”
“Sam, you won’t—”
“You don’t know that. Make sure I don’t try to hurt him.”
You bowed your head and trotted back up the stairs, closing and locking the cage door behind you. Dean was still waiting in the kitchen, and he stood upon seeing you emerge from the basement.
“You can see him, but we have to be careful,” you said quietly. “If he smells you he could try to get at you, that’s gonna be his first instinct. The cage door down there has silver on it, so if he tries anything it’ll hurt, bad, but I need you to stay on the stairs, keep your distance.”
Dean held his hands up as if in surrender. “Trust me, I’ll be keepin’ my distance.”
You led him down the basement, slowly, his boots clunking heavily on the thick wooden planks. You could hear the dull, repetitive THWACK of Sam’s fists against the punching bag, but after the basement door closed, they ceased, and the space fell silent as you and Dean came down the steps. A little more than halfway down, you motion for him to stop.
“Dean, stay here.”
He nodded quietly and waited for you to slip past the cage, locking it behind you.
Sam was standing in the corner by the punching bag, his arms folded across his middle. You motioned for him to walk over, but he shook his head. “Y/N, I can’t… I don’t want him to see me like this. I can smell him, I can hear his heartbeat.”
“You won’t hurt him.” You walked closer to him, reaching for one of his hands. “Sam, come on, I’ll be there. The door’s got silver on it, you won’t be able to get out.”
Sam lowered his voice. “What if I hurt you?”
“You won’t. Now come on.” You led him slowly over to the wire door. His heartbeat increased with every step, and you heard his breathing grow more and shakier.
When Dean came into view, you didn’t know if Sam was going to recoil or lunge at the gate. He could hear Dean’s heartbeat, steady and slow, the rush of blood pumping through his veins, traces of whiskey and cedar covering up the thick, coppery scent…
...No, stop it! That’s your brother! You wouldn’t bite your own brother!
“Sammy?” Dean’s voice was quiet as he took another step down the stairs. “Hey, it’s me.”
Sam paused, took a deep breath. “I know.” He looked down at the ground and closed his eyes, trying as hard as he could to stop from hurling himself at the wall of the cage. “How’ve you been?”
“Uh, worried, for one,” Dean chuckled in an attempt to lighten the mood, “I went out for a little during the night, tried looking for a cure or something…”
“Yeah.” Sam swallowed and clenched his fist. He didn’t know what the fuck was happening, but all he wanted to do was break out of the cage and rip his brother’s chest apart, get at the thick, pulsing muscle that was hidden behind bone and sinew, devour the warm, blood-drenched organ that kept his brother alive…
No! Goddamn it! Stop!
“I thought you’d be gone.” Sam cleared his throat as a fresh wave of hunger washed over him.
“Had to make sure you’re okay, didn’t I?” Dean caught your warning glance to stay where he was and decided not to take the last two steps down. Hell, he might be too close already. “How do you feel?”
Sam swallowed thickly as you increased the pressure on his hand. “Honestly, I feel good. I’m strong, I’m not hurting, just wanna get the hell out of here.”
“And why can’t you?” Dean shifted his gaze back and forth between you and Sam.
“Because if I get out of here I’m not gonna be able to stop myself from trying to hurt you or someone else,” Sam stated bluntly.
Dean seemed taken aback by Sam’s words. Apparently, he hadn’t considered just how dangerous Sam really was until he’d said it. “Sam, you wouldn’t.”
“You don’t know what I’d do, Dean, hell, I don’t know what I’d do.” Sam’s body trembled as he spoke, but he stood his ground. “The only reason I’m not going after you right now is that I know I shouldn’t, but if Y/N wasn’t here with me, if this happened somewhere else… I don’t know if either of us would be alive right now.”
You saw Dean swallow, saw his Adam’s apple bob in his throat, and heard Sam growl, low and deep in his chest.
“Sam, don’t say that.”
“You’re not in the place to tell me what to do, Dean.” Sam retorted. “I’m a monster, both of us know that. You don’t know how… how hungry I feel right now. I don’t have a friggin’ clue what’s making me feel this way, but if you weren’t my brother… I’d kill you, without thinking.”
Looking up, you noticed Sam’s upper lip beginning to twitch. He was starting to lose control. “Dean, I think you should go, this isn’t—”
Dean, obviously, didn’t listen. Instead, he did the worst thing he could. He took another step, closing the distance between him and his brother by another two feet.
Overcome by hunger, Sam snapped. You saw his eyes flash yellow as his instinct to attack sprang free. He snarled, his lips curling back over his teeth as his muscles bunch. He lunged forward, slamming all two-hundred pounds of his body against the cage. His long fingers were pointed in two-inch claws, which curled in the wire before he stumbled back with a yelp of pain; the silver on the wire had seared his skin.
Dean fell back when Sam crashed against the cage, bringing an arm up instinctively to protect his face.
“Dean!” You shouted, pulling Sam back against the far wall and holding him there. “Get out! Now!”
You saw Dean stagger to his feet his eyes fixed on the snarling beast of a man now ten feet away from him. He was staring at Sam with a mixture of fear, anger, and sorrow on his face. Sam took several half-gasping, half-growling breaths before reeling himself back in. He collapsed to the floor, his fingers pressing hard into the smooth concrete. He bowed his head as his body shook even harder.
“D-Dean, I’m sorry!” He gasped out. “I didn’t mean to, I couldn’t help—”
The door at the top of the stairs slammed before Sam could finish, and seconds later you heard the rumble of the Impala’s engine and the grind of her tires scraping on the dirt road as she tore out of the drive and down the road.
Sam’s shoulders heaved with a sob as he collapsed back, breathing hard as he fought to still his shaking hands. The claws had vanished and his eyes were back to hazel, but he still shook with panic. “I didn’t mean to do that,” he choked, “I didn’t—I didn’t—”
“Sam, it’s okay, he’s just gone to cool off.” You soothed him. “He’ll be back, I promise.”
Sam shook his head and reached to grip your hand as you rubbed his shoulder soothingly. “No way in hell. He saw me snap and that was it. He thinks I’m a monster.” He turned his head, and you saw tears streaming from his now hazel eyes. “I am a monster.”
You sat next to him and wrapped your arms around him as tight as you could. “Oh, Sam, it’s all right. You’re not a monster, you’re not. You’re adapting to a new lifestyle, and yeah, you have some different urges, but you’re just starting out. It’s barely been an hour since you woke up, I didn’t expect you to stay under control.” You hugged him tighter and let him bury his face in the curve of your neck. “Dean got spooked, that’s all. He’ll come back.”
“Will he?” Sam straightened his back and practically glared down at you. “How can you know that? Hm? Tell me how you know my brother’s gonna come back thinking I’m still the guy he grew up with.”
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golden-van-fleet · 6 years ago
Text
Your Song
Summary: Gwilym has loved you for a long time and will continue to.
Word Count: ~2.2k
A/N: Hi! I needed to write about Gwilym. I’m not sure about the format? Also on mobile for this one. Enjoy!
It’s a little bit funny, this feeling inside
I’m not one of those who can easily hide
Despite Gwilym being an actor, his fatal flaw was his inability to hide what was on his mind. The entire world knew how he felt about you, except for, well, you. It made his stomach turn, to see you with a man that wasn’t him, holding his hand, kissing his cheek, calling him “babe”. He hoped, wished, and prayed desperately to be that man.
I don’t have much money, but boy if I did
I’d buy a big house where we both could live
He knew you wanted a big house in the countryside. It’d been your dream for as long as either of you could remember. In fact, it was the first thing he bought with his paycheck from Bohemian Rhapsody. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t dream of the two of you living there like Allie and Noah in The Notebook. He didn’t want to buy your love, per se, but if he could afford what you wanted, he wanted to be able to spoil you. For only being your best friend, he treated you a hell of a lot better than that boyfriend of yours ever could. Any of them, really.
And it wasn’t lost on you. You’d lost a couple boyfriends because they felt they couldn’t compete with Gwilym, and they couldn’t. Gwilym was over the top for you and only for you. When he bought the house, you were stunned. He constantly had you over, one of the guest rooms unofficially becoming your room. You’d been by his side before the fame and the fortune, it was only fair in his eyes that you were still there after it.
If I was a sculptor, but then again, no
Or a man who makes potions in a traveling show
I know it’s not much but it’s the best I can do
My gift is my song and this one’s for you
Every performance he did as Brian May was with you in mind. Gwilym was willing to go to the ends of the earth to prove that he was worthy of your love, to prove to you that he was the one you needed. He knew, rationally, you never needed a man to be happy or to succeed. He also knew, selfishly, that he was the one for you. This was a man willing to bend over backwards for you at any given moment, knowing you would do the same.
And you can tell everybody that this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it’s done
I hope you don’t mind,
I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is, now you’re in the world
The day you met was a day he’d never forget. Your eyes piercing back into his own, a stare that sent a delicious shiver down his spine. It wasn’t a malicious stare, it was one of amusement. You were working at a local coffee shop while finishing your bachelor’s degree around the same time Gwilym began filming one of many up and coming projects. He’d come in with an agenda, a man on a mission, but when his eyes met yours, he babbled like an infant. You were so kind, you didn’t make fun of him, you smiled a little and let him compose himself.
Ever since that day, he made a point to visit you at work, seated at one of the tables in the corner as long as he could be without disturbing you, your coworkers, or the other patrons. You found it sweet, and your heart ached to get to know him.
So you did. He’d been to your apartment more times than the members of your family had over the course of the next year. It was around that year mark Gwilym realized he couldn’t live without you. It was also around the time you’d started your string of terrible boyfriends.
Gwilym couldn’t thank you enough for changing his quality of life. You breathed a life into everything that he’d never been able to find. Life by your side was beautiful. You never let him dwell on the bad, and as hard as it could be to find the good sometimes, he always tried. If not for his sake, then for yours.
I sat on the roof, and kicked off the moss
Well, a few of the verses, well they’ve got me quite cross
He had to tell you. He couldn’t say it to your face, but he couldn’t not say it to your face. He wrote letter after letter, page after page, hoping that something, anything would encapsulate his feelings about you. Late night after late night, he failed to document exactly what he wanted to say. He didn’t want to plan out what he wanted to say, but he needed it to be everything he’d had on his mind for years.
When you showed up at his door during one of those late nights, he told himself as soon as he opened the door he’d tell you. What he didn’t expect was to see you sobbing, throwing yourself at him. He caught you before you could hit the floor, catching a glimpse of you before you buried your face into his shoulder. Your eyes were puffy and swollen with tears, your face red and stained with tear tracks. It absolutely broke his heart.
“He broke up with me,” you whimpered. “Almost two years, I thought I was going to marry this man, and then suddenly I’m not good enough?”
But if only you knew how good enough you were. Gwilym saw the sun rise and set within you. You were the very center of his universe. He couldn’t tell you now, you’d just had your heart broken. He could try, in vain, to tell you how wonderful he found you and about the total joy you brought to his life, but his dark secret would have to wait a little longer.
You climbed out onto the roof outside the guest room window, the full moon hanging bright above your head. There was a gentle, almost imperceptible breeze floating through the summer night. This was your favorite part of the house. It was your hideaway, wrapped around the back of the house with a full view of the river in the background. It felt as though time stood still when you were there. You found yourself lost in the peacefulness of it all until Gwilym squeezed himself through the window frame to sit with you.
“He thought you and I had something going on on the side. I told him that you were my best friend, that you always would be, that without you there is no me. And he was jealous.” You sniffled, the tears of sadness now transformed to tears of resentment. “But maybe he had a reason to be jealous. You’re all I need in my life.”
Gwilym was nothing short of stunned. That was the first time in his life that he was utterly lost for words.
“I- I can’t be your rebound, Y/N. I’ve loved you for far too long to let myself be who builds you up for someone else to tear back down. You mean too much to me for that.” He felt a tear slip down his cheek. His heart was on the line. As much as he wanted to be with you immediately, to hold you in his arms and never let go, he couldn’t. Not right now.
“I’m not saying I want to jump from him to you. But I did a lot of thinking on the drive over here. You’ve always been there for me. You’ve been this support, this rock, and I can’t help but feel I’ve taken it for granted. And for that, I’m so sorry. I know the way you look at me when I’m not looking because I look at you the same way. I always have. And maybe I was too afraid of ruining what we had built up so beautifully. Rome wasn’t built in a day, but they were laying bricks every hour, and that’s what we did. We’re still doing it. So if you’ll let me, I’d like to keep building it, I want to know that it’s not going to go away after tonight.”
He forced himself to look at you, your eyes burning with unshed tears. It would never go away. It couldn’t.
But the sun’s been quite kind while I wrote this song
It’s for people like you that keep it turned on
Over the course of the following months, your relationship bloomed into the blossom it was destined to be. The dark cloud that hung over Gwilym’s head had finally given way to the warm rays of the sun, and he embraced them fully. Loving you was diving head first into a pool that had no bottom. There was always a new depth to be reached, and when he thought he’d reached his capacity, there was always more.
You noticed the change, welcomed it, and encouraged it. Gwilym was finally back to the man he was when you first met. The man that you thought you were going to fall in love with. However, you’d hung that up when he brought over one of his girlfriends, unannounced, to your flat the night you were going to tell him how you felt. It crushed you, but you couldn’t tell him that. To know that now, it wouldn’t happen again, he was yours? It was heaven in and of itself.
So excuse me forgetting, but these things I do
You see I've forgotten if they're green or they're blue
Anyway the thing is what I really mean
Yours are the sweetest eyes I've ever seen
He had to ask you to marry him. He made up his mind before the two of you had even been together six months. It took half a lifetime, or so he thought, to get with you in the first place. Hell, you’d moved in together after two months together, what difference would it make?
He found himself in the same position he was years and years prior, back in that tiny coffee shop. Your eyes were focused intently on his, your smile kind and your hand relaxed in his. Gwilym was in his element, at home, alone, with you. And there, in the comfort of your shared bed, he was going to ask you to be his wife, and he couldn’t choke the words out. All he could do was present you with the ring first.
“Marry me. Please,” he added, softening what sounded like a demand.
“Easily,” you smiled, pulling his face towards yours and locking your lips into a breathless kiss. “I would marry you a million times over.”
He found himself in the same predicament when it came to your vows.
“I’m not usually one to forget what I’m saying before I say it, but you look so beautiful I can’t help myself,” he began, chuckling as he bashfully wiped away a tear. “I had this whole thing planned about how you were the one for me and I knew from the moment I met you, but even to this day you render me speechless. So forgive me if I cut this a bit short, but I’d really love to call you my wife sooner rather than later.”
And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple, but now that it's done
I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world
When your daughter was born with your bright, beautiful eyes, Gwilym cried more than he ever thought he would. He was so gentle with her, so gentle with you… You couldn’t love him more if you tried.
Despite having your eyes, your daughter was Gwilym’s clone. She had her father wrapped around her tiny little finger from the first cry she let out the day she was born. Gwilym immediately switched into protective dad mode, refusing to let her go without a fight. Unless she was going to you, of course. But even that took a little convincing.
One night, about three weeks after she was born, Gwilym got up in the middle of the night to tend to her. He took the wailing newborn out of her bassinet in your bedroom to the rocking chair in what would be her nursery.
“Alright, love, it’s okay.” He’d done everything he could think of to soothe her and nothing was working, and the last thing he wanted to do was wake you. He unbuttoned the front of her onesie, placing the newborn over his heart. He’d been told to try skin to skin bonding whenever he could, and by some miracle, it calmed her down.
Gwilym didn’t realize he was humming until he started to sing lyrics to a song he didn’t realize he knew.
I hope you don't mind,
I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world
Your song had had its share of wrong notes and tweaked lyrics. It conveyed a full spectrum of emotions, highlighting the ups and the downs that came with life and love. Your song was unique, and Gwilym was blessed to share it with you.
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