#need this essay written

[themoonstonechronicler]

damn this sucks

[girl-archie]

me: archie and paddington you have to stop. your eyes too brown. your soul too whimsical. your heart too kind. they'll kill you

archie & paddington:

punisher by phoebe bridgers

(you can't even be joyful and optimistic anymore because they will frame you and have you put in jail :/)

[sparta369]

I bought slay the princess but haven’t started it ‘cause it kinda intimidates me, can you convince me to play it?

Ok now I know you just asked me to convince you to play it but hear me out

Don't play it yet

There's a huge, Free Content expansion coming out on the 24th of this month, in just 8 days called The Pristine Cut, which is going to expand the game by about 35%. The Devs themselves have said to wait for the expansion release if you haven't played it already lol

That being said, I'd never pass up an opportunity to gush about one of my favorite games ever created

I realized far too late that I'd accidentally written far more than either of us probably wanted. So I'll try to sparknotes it, and leave the full thing below the cut.

The less you know going in, the better. However, it is still a horror game. You can find a list of content warnings here. It's just a list, so it doesn't really reveal very much.

A single playthrough lasts about 3-4 hours on average, though I can guarantee you'll want to do more than one. The game is positively dense with choices. It's impossible to see everything in one playthrough, and one would be hard-pressed to have the exact same playthrough twice.

Words cannot really capture how much I love this game. It's story masterfully crafted with a vast ocean of choices for the player to make, all of which make a true and profound impact on the narrative. If you enjoyed Disco Elysium or The Stanley Parable, You'll like Slay the Princess. The game was lovingly hand-drawn, pencil on paper, and the music was beautifully composed. The voice acting, featuring the talents of Nichole Goodnight and Jonathan Sims, are also, in my opinion, phenomenal.

I truly cannot express the emotional impact this game has left me with. It's a game I'll carry with me for the rest of my life.

Whether you intend to stop here or read on, I'll leave you with this one screenshot. It's only text, and it's literally the second thing you see upon booting up the game, so don't worry about spoilers lmao

"Whatever horrors you may find in these dark spaces, have heart and see them through."

"There are no premature endings. There are no wrong decisions."

"There are only fresh perspectives and new beginnings."

"This is a love story."

Oh boy you clicked the "keep reading" button :o) I wrote this over the course of most of my day today before I realized exactly how long it was. Besides a small change to the end, I'm going to leave most of it un-touched, just for the sake of preserving whatever the hell was going on in my head at the time :o)

Slay the Princess is one of those games where, the less you know going in, the better, So I'll do my best to convince you without revealing anything.

Still, though, It is a horror game. If you would like to look through it just in case, you can find a list of content warnings on their website here. It gives a list of many things you may encounter, but there is a 0% chance that you will encounter all, or likely even half, of the things described in there. In addition, they present these things in a way that reveals as little as possible. Still, I would personally recommend against reading through them, but there's no shame or judgement if you go dig through it. You know yourself better than anybody, if you think ya need it that's fine.

There's also some flickering image effects & a parallax effect that has caused motion sickness for some players, but both of these can be disabled in the settings.

With all that out of the way...

Words truly cannot explain how much I love this game.

It is an absolute masterwork of interactive narrative storytelling. No other game I've played or heard of in my life gives as much weight to every single choice you make, every little thing you do. There are so many choices and possibilities, and not once does the game ever make you feel like you've chosen "wrong." It's impossible to see everything in one playthrough, and you would be hard-pressed to get the exact same playthrough twice. Quite literally, every time I've watched somebody else play the game, they happened upon something I'd never seen before, despite me having 100% of the achievements.

One playthrough usually takes around 3-4 hours, but you will almost certainly want to do more than one.

There are also a number of places where you can safely and logically pause and come back later, should you need to.

The narrative itself is expertly woven. The storytelling is phenomenal, interweaving paralyzing fear with heart-aching beauty, while also carrying a healthy amount of comedy at carefully chosen places. The themes carry through beautifully. I've cried actual tears on more than one occasion, and it's not easy to get that out of me. Slay The Princess is a story that will be a part of my heart for as long as I live.

If you've played and enjoyed Disco Elysium, you'll enjoy Slay The Princess.

If you've played and enjoyed The Stanley parable, you'll enjoy Slay The Princess.

I know that I often struggle with games that require a lot of reading, and that includes a lot of visual novel type games.

Thankfully, the game is, for the most part, fully voice-acted :) The very few bits that aren't voiced are that way for narrative reasons hee hoo

The voice acting itself is, in my opinion, phenomenal. Both actors put their heart and souls into their roles, and their care shows in their performances. The Princess is voiced by Nichole Goodnight & the Narrator is voiced by Jonathan Sims (Who you may recognize from The Magnus Archives, if you were ever into that).

The art of the game is beautiful. It is all lovingly hand-drawn, pencil on paper. Thousands of images, and even a few animations, all coming together to form a wonderfully unique visual style that lends itself well to the game itself.

The soundtrack of this game, composed by Brandon Boone & with vocal performances by Amelia Jones, is absolutely breathtaking. It does a phenomenal job setting and supporting the tone of the game, whether it be tension, fear, hope, joy, or anything between and beyond. I can't put it's beauty into words.

Brandon Boone actually just recently won the "Game Music Award" at the World Soundtrack Awards for his work on Slay The Princess, and I deeply believe that it was 100% deserved.

This is... probably far more than you ever asked for. But I mean it when I say that Slay the Princess is one of my favorite games of all time. I mean it when I say that Slay The Princess is a story that will be a part of my heart for as long as I live. I'll take any opportunity to make more people play it, in hopes that it might impact them even a fraction as much as it has impacted me. I've bought a total of 11 copies of this game (1 for myself, 9 which were distributed to friends, and one that's coming with the Collector's Edition)

As my final word, I'll once again remind you:

"Whatever horrors you may find in these dark spaces, have heart and see them through."

"There are no premature endings. There are no wrong decisions."

"There are only fresh perspectives and new beginnings."

"This is a love story."

[abnomi]

EVERY REASON (that i can think of) AS TO WHY TURBO/KING CANDY IS NEURODIVERGENT 💥💥

i would like to make a disclaimer first and foremost about the obvious, being that Turbo/King Candy is heavily implied to have narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). Very often, characters with these disorders are portrayed as villains, and Turbo is no exception to this. There's nothing wrong with antagonistic characters having said disorders, per se, but when the only representation available for people with these conditions are found in characters you're not supposed to root for, it can be really disheartening. i won't be erasing these parts of him because i feel it would be in poor taste to gloss over those core elements of who he is, but plz keep in mind that having any kind of personality disorder doesn't make anyone inherently evil!!!🌞 your ACTIONS make you, not your brain

Also if anyone has any suggestions or other ideas for his neurodiversity, i would love to hear them! please do share!! I LOVE PSYCHOANALYZING CHARACTERS AND HEARING OTHER PEOPLE PSYCHOANALYZE THEM !!!! YAY🎉 if u agree or disagree with any of my points I'd love to discuss them further :-]

without further ado... click read more to find out…😈 be ready for a lot of reaches

💥 ADHD 💥

STIMMING

Turbo's constantly moving around in some way; he's a very expressive character! even as King Candy, he can't seem to conceal his frequent giggling. it's a big habit of his; he seems to do it involuntarily to regulate himself, including when he's nervous or uncomfortable.

he seems to display other repetitive behaviors as well, like doing his iconic thumbs-up pose, sticking out his tongue, or hopping around gleefully. he is but a jovial court jester..

i personally like to think that his phrases, "Turbo-tastic!" and "Have some candy!" are vocal stims of his, although i equally really love the interpretation that these (and the aforementioned stims) are tics :-]

another headcanon; i think it would make a lot of sense for him to have an oral fixation of some sort (ignoring the whole sigmund freud part of the term ermm...); just lots of biting, chewing, needing to have something in his mouth. It would align with the whole idea that he smokes, too

HYPERACTIVITY

we can clearly see throughout the film that Turbo has a lot of energy, made abundantly clear by his mannerisms and general behavior. he's constantly moving, using exaggerated expressions and gestures to communicate + express himself. He's one of the most animated and bouncy characters in the movie, next to Vanellope! it's silly how a character not very grounded in reality is such a threat, but i suppose that's what makes him so threatening in the first place...

another factor in this is how he is very adrenaline-seeking, craving activities that give him a rush (sugar rush...😂😂). more on that in a bit!!

HYPERFIXATION

Turbo's fixation with winning is all-consuming for him; it's an obsession. he doesn't appear to care about much else, if anything besides it. this could be interpreted as a hyperfixation for him (or special interest if ur all about that autism lifestyle), as it overtakes all of his focus and impedes every process of his mind.

it's clear that racing is much more than a passion for him, and while that fact is due to how he was programmed, it's a major character trait of his regardless that could be correlated to neurodivergence.

HYPERFOCUS

There seems to be a big theme of "all or nothing" when it comes to Turbo. he will either be fully dedicated to something or brush it aside without a second thought. it can't be denied that he fully wraps himself up in what he wants, whether it's a conflict he can't let go of or a new pursuit he's hungrily chasing after. 

ultimately, his dedication varies depending on if it is relevant to him and his interests or not, but this aspect of him still shares patterns with neurodivergent thought processes.

INSTANT GRATIFICATION

Seeing as he has a tendency to cheat in his use of code to spawn in whatever his heart desires, it can be assumed that this could do with Turbo wanting instant gratification to fill that bitter, empty void inside of him. while this could simply be brushed aside as greed and his belief that he is obligated to have access to whatever he wants, this trait is consistent with his generally dopamine-seeking behavior and wanting to be instantly rewarded by his actions. His obsession with needing to feel good directly relates to his need for another buzz, constantly after the next rush. (a sugar rush if you will☺☺☺)

ADRENALINE-SEEKING

Closely related to the previous speculation, Turbo always seems to be chasing his next high. he loves the thrill of action and being surrounded by crowds of people below him. it's why his big thing is racing! people cheer him on, he can do whatever he wants, he can go really fast and look cool..

it's possible that a big aspect of why he does this is to distract himself from any kind of pain, because pain = vulnerability. bro does NOT know how to independently cope with his own problems.. HE MAD AS HELLLLL!!! 😂😂

STRUGGLE WITH SELF CARE

(i know this is reaching but bear with me... 🐻) going off of his appearance and tendency to make poor decisions, it can be gathered that this man lacks skill in the self care department. his yellowing teeth and sunken eyes not only serve to complement his design, but also give way to the idea that he neglects himself in favor for whatever weird scheme he's up to.

of course, Turbo does prioritize himself above everyone else, but he doesn't strike me as the type to care much about how others think he smells. him being a bother to anyone isn't a concern of his. he cares about whatever gets him the most praise and attention from as many people as possible, which is winning and racing. Who cares about how clean he is when he's up on a podium holding a shiny, golden trophy, anyway?

It's likely that he had to step his game up when he went under disguise as king candy, which is why he looks well-groomed in comparison to his more corpse-like appearance. Ugly hoe. it can also be assumed that he's had more time to focus on himself because everyone loves him without question... Well, except for Vanellope, but who cares about her, right?

also, i know he makes a condescending comment to Ralph about how bad his breath smells, but it's made abundantly clear that Turbo is a massive hypocrite. his comment doesn't erase the possibility that he has suffered from such "halitosis" as well.

💥 ANXIETY 💥

GENERAL ANXIOUS BEHAVIOR

i know, i know, this could technically be chalked up to be "Turbo is nervously giggling and shit because he's scared of getting caught," but guys. g

even in the flashback scene, we can see how easily stressed he can become in an alarmingly short period of time. he is extremely insecure, therefore i am led to believe he is not only emotionally dysregulated, but also by extension, anxiety ridden.

yes, this is purely speculative, but who's to say that he wasn't like this before? being high-strung and intense are significant facets of his personality consistently portrayed throughout the film. as long as he is getting exactly what he wants, he is happy; the moment he loses even a blip of control, however, he immediately grows extremely tense.

if Turbo wasn't anxious about his disguise as King Candy before, he was anxious about how much attention he was receiving on a given day. if not that, then he'd be anxious over how he presents himself. He hates how he can't control how other people perceive him, which is why he is constantly trying to act like he's better than he is.

its why he justifies his behavior to himself, proudly making others refer to him as the "rightful ruler" of sugar rush and relishing in the attention of his countless underlings. Any secure and stable person would NOT ACT LIKE THIS!!!!😭😭😭

FIGHT OR FLIGHT

As we can see a handful of times on screen, Turbo's instinct to protect himself is very easily activated.

 his fear manifests in anger and aggression. we can see at multiple points how easy it is to upset him or fluster him; his anger is one side of the same coin, the opposite end being his fear and paranoia.

Going off of this point, have you noticed that Turbo is either satisfied or furious without much of an in-between? how the second something isn't under his manipulation, he lashes out and fights back? I'm led to believe that this is how he responds to fear (AAUAAYAUUUUGGHHH 🐡🐡🐡🐡🐡🐡🐡). This guy is so against the idea of being vulnerable, that even when afraid, he will utilize violence to regain his dominance over the situation at hand.

CONTROL + PARANOIA

Turbo's always trying to writhe or fight his way out of uncomfortable situations, unable to exist outside of his comfort zone for seconds at a time.

his defensive, paranoid, and controlling behavior are all reflections of how deeply insecure this man is. He feels such an intense need for everything to go exactly how he expects it to go that the moment he senses any kind of threat, he instantly jumps to defend himself and what he feels that he has "earned," regardless of whether there truly is a threat or not.

this could potentially be a coping mechanism for his anxiety and sense of stability; can't forget to mention how territorial he is!! he jumps to conclusions about what others' intentions are before they even get a chance to reply, as seen with his first encounter with Ralph in the movie. 

the racer is so internally discombobulated that he seeks any sense of stability on his environment, including on those around him. his sense of self is so warped that he copes with constant distraction; being under the spotlight, being actively racing, having to be showered with attention, having others make him feel good because he doesn't know how to do it for himself. he needs to feel like everything is under control, lest everything falls apart.

"...if there's ONE thing I can't abide, it's ANYTHING out of order!"

💥 NPD 💥

INFLATED SENSE OF SELF IMPORTANCE

Turbo's most in-your-face trait above all else. It's made more than crystal clear in every scene he's in that his arrogance is a determining factor in how he interacts with others. This is exactly what drives him to desperately crave admiration, to chase after others he's envious of because he thinks he is obligated to take what they have.

he seems to genuinely think he is entitled to get whatever he wants, just because he is inherently "special" or "better" than everyone else. Why else would he have made himself a king, a step above princess?

EXCESSIVE NEED FOR ADMIRATION

Turbo's self worth is COMPLETELY dependent on the opinions of children and teenagers. I think i don't need to say any more than that, but i will. (Evil).

As cartoonishly massive as his ego is, i think that it's fair to assume that Turbo has a very unstable sense of self, distorting his perception of his own worth down with it. his near-constant flaunting and need to be the best is a dead giveaway to his deeply-ridden self-doubt. The foundation of his stability is built around how "good" he is (at racing and winning), how powerful he is, whether or not he is being prioritized above everyone else, whether or not he is the absolute best, etc. etc.

The racer outright manipulates others to shower him with admiration and undeserved appreciation. He is incapable of forming a true sense of internal value, instead heavily and codependently relying on others to form it for him. if he isn't the best, he may as well just be nothing.

INTENSE JEALOUSY

He reacts so severely to what he perceives as others taking away what is rightfully his that it only goes to solidify my previous points even further. the second someone else is getting more attention than him, Turbo will bend over backwards to rip back the praise he believes he so rightly deserves.

being extremely competitive, he will one-up against anyone he thinks of as a threat, dedicating himself to taking them down to the best of his ability, and making sure they STAY down to top it all off.

INABILITY TO HANDLE CRITICISM

if we really dissect the entire one-off joke with Turbo insisting that his stolen pink castle is actually "salmon," along with all of his other domineering behaviors, we can garner that he is very persistent in how he wants others to view him. i wholeheartedly believe that this would translate into him not only being defensive over his supposed "ownership" of Sugar Rush, but also over himself and his own insecurities.

He needs to feel good about himself or else he will die and quite literally try to kill everyone.

LACK OF EMPATHY

He appears to have a fondness for making jokes in very poor taste. Turbo has a big sense of humor, but it's always at the expense of others. Be it a pun about a "fungeon," or jumping to protect himself with a joke about "hitting a guy with glasses," he has a tendency to take serious situations very lightly. It's not that he's unaware of the weight of it; he simply doesn't take it Seriously.

its admittedly impressive how he was able to feign empathy so well for Ralph; it goes to show how he is very capable of understanding that what he's doing is wrong, but ultimately does nothing to change his behavior because it doesn't impact him personally. 

i would like to honor this part of him, because even in the possible alternate path of a redemption arc, his struggle with empathy can be explored in a variety of interesting ways :-] he can understand complicated emotions and situations on an analytical level, but he doesn't feel for them unless it has to do with him specifically. (this obviously doesn't make him inherently evil, his ACTIONS make him evil)

💥 ASPD 💥

LACK OF REMORSE/GUILT

One of Turbo's core characteristics is just how far he is willing to go for his own self-interest with lack of regard for how it impacts everyone else. he has absolutely no concern for how anyone else feels besides himself, willing to go so far as to attempt to mutilate a 9-year-old to achieve his petty goals.

Turbo is shameless when it comes to how he goes about getting his way. While I'd like to believe he isn't fully incapable of feeling regret, he doesn't showcase feeling it in the movie itself. The most regret he'll feel is when he slips up and exposes himself. anything else is the fault of everyone else; he is untouchable in his eyes.

DECEITFUL TENDENCIES + LYING

Where do i even start with this one.

well, first of all, let's acknowledge the... erm, horse? in the room? 🐎😅(Please someone help me there is a horse in my room help helphel) being that Turbo went under disguise as King Candy for at least a decade. Even before this, there's a good chance that he's already had plenty of experience with lies and manipulation. i'd be willing to bet on this!!

one of his specialties is being proficient in manipulation, be it the code of games or the minds of people. theyre basically the same thing to him, anyway... I'm sure you all know the scene where he uses 16 manipulation tactics against Ralph and wins. this was Obviously not the first time he'd done this.

REPETITION OF HARMFUL BEHAVIORS

Time and time again, Turbo can't seem to help himself when it comes to poor decision-making. he never internalizes that his bad choices aren't JUST bad for others, but also for himself, continuing to escalate further and further into very dangerous behaviors until he literally dies.

Here's a list of bad decisions he has made! (at least, that we know of)

Pinning himself above his peers

Harassment + stalking

Carelessly charging through GCS with his car, endangering countless civilians

Attempting to take over a game that isn't his x2

Vehicular manslaughter

Implied mass murder + attempted murder, attempted mutilation

Mass endangerment

Breaking and entering, theft, usurpation, plagiarism

and more!!!!!!!

AND HE LEARNS FROM ABSOLUTELY NONE OF THIS!!! with some of the items listed here, he's attempted to do multiple times! Absolute buffoon.

RECKLESS DISREGARD FOR SAFETY OF SELF AND OTHERS

Considering how he was willing to charge into a game that wasn't his own with the awareness that it could permanently kill him, going as far as to recklessly crash into another car (albeit it's possible this was unintentional), it's easy to gather that he doesn't seem to consider anyone's safety at all in the spur of the moment.

IMPULSITIVITY

his impulsivity and disregard for safety both go hand-in-hand. When it gets to a certain point, Turbo's emotions will boil over and blow up in a cold rage, thus causing him to spiral and act on impulse, becoming a detrimental force to himself as well as everyone around him.

What's interesting is how much restraint he is capable of; he typically is very strategic in how he orchestrates his plans! but once he reaches his breaking point, he snaps and leaves all of his hard work behind in favor of something that calls for his immediate attention.

💥 ETC. 💥

extra tidbits i didnt have enough energy to fully delve into :-]

BPD

Fear of abandonment

Blurry sense of identity

Feelings of emptiness

Self destructive tendencies

Emotional instability

Explosive anger

ODD (oppositional defiant disorder)

He seems so infatuated with his own autonomy that he gets to the point of being resistant and defiant

Resisting against the rules of the world that he directly caused as a result of his own actions, being that one shouldn't "go Turbo."

Enjoys upsetting/getting a rise out of others. this is more speculative as i am going off of the assumption that he thinks pissing people off is funny, based on his other behavioral patterns. (cruel sense of humor, wanting to feel above others via control & manipulation, enjoyment of inflicting pain onto others)

Forcefully defends himself and refuses any kind of criticism

Lashes out when he feels slighted

Excessive persistence despite all odds, whether it's beneficial to him or not

ok bye!! thank you if you managed to read this far ^^ peace and love take care of yourself! all in all turbo is so neurodivergent ok please Okay <3 get this thing his meds

[taradactyls]

So I could be totally wrong but, I believe it was sort of expected that men/gentlemen lose their virginity before marriage in regency times. But I also there’s some fandom ‘debate’ about whether or not Mr Darcy would’ve had sex before getting married. So I was just curious about what your canon for Mr Darcy in T3W is. Is he a virgin or not?

I knew someone would ask me this eventually, haha. I've actually had really long conversations with my beta reader about this trying to figure it out. It sounds like this might all be stuff that you’ve already seen discussed in the fandom, but I’ve never thought about it deeply before and so these are new thoughts to me.

I keep going over the historical real-world likelihood, the authorial intent, and the text itself but I’m still not 100%. I’ll explain my thinking and what I find most likely, but here’s your warning that it’s not a clear cut yes/no.

Because on one hand, at that time period it was most common for men in his position to have seen sex workers or have casual encounters/mistresses with women from their estates. Though I do absolutely believe not all men did that, no matter how much wealth and power they had. To go back some centuries, William the Conqueror seemed to be famously celibate (no hints of male lovers either according to the biography I read) until his marriage, and there's no evidence of affairs after it either. The best guesses as to why are that it was due to his religious devotion and the problems that had arisen from himself being a bastard and not wanting to recreate that situation. Concerns over religion and illegitimate children would certainly still have been applicable in the regency to men who thought that way. And in modern times I've seen sex workers say that when an 18/21yo is booked in by his family/friends to 'become a man' often they end up just talking and agree to lie about the encounter. After all, it’s not like every man wants casual sex, even if they aren’t demisexual or something in that vein. But, statistically speaking, the precedent of regency gentlemen would make Darcy not a virgin.

On the other hand, just how aware was Jane Austen, the very religious daughter of a country rector, of the commonness of this? There’s a huge difference between knowing affairs and sex workers existed (and no one who had seen a Georgian newspaper could be blind to this) and realising that the majority of wealthy men saw sex workers at some point even if they condemned the more public and profligate affairs. The literature for young ladies at the time paints extramarital sex - including the lust of men outside of marriage - as pretty universally bad and dangerous. This message is seen from 'Pamela' and other gothic fiction to non-fiction conduct books which Jane Austen would have encountered. Here's something I found in 'Letters to a Young Lady' by the reverend John Bennett which I found particularly interesting as it's in direct conversation with other opinions of the era:

"A reformed rake makes the best husband." Does he? It would be very extraordinary, if he should. Besides, are you very certain, that you have power to reform him? It is a matter, that requires some deliberation. This reformation, if it is to be accomplished, must take place before marriage. Then if ever, is the period of your power. But how will you be assured that he is reformed? If he appears so, is he not insidiously concealing his vices, to gain your affections? And when he knows, they are secured, may he not, gradually, throw off the mask, and be dissipated, as before? Profligacy of this kind is seldom eradicated. It resembles some cutaneous disorders, which appear to be healed, and yet are, continually, making themselves visible by fresh eruptions. A man, who has carried on a criminal intercourse with immoral women is not to be trusted, His opinion of all females is an insult to their delicacy. His attachment is to sex alone, under particular modifications.

The definition of a rake is more than a man who has seen a sex worker once, it's about appearance and general conduct too, but again, would that distinction be made to young ladies? Because they seem to simply be continuously taught 'lust when unmarried is bad and beware men who you know engage in extramarital sex.' As a side note, Jane Austen certainly knew at least something about the mechanics of sex: her letters and literature she read alludes to it, and she grew up around farm animals in the countryside which is an education in itself.

We can also see from this exert that the school of thought seems to be 'reformed rake' vs 'never a rake' in contention for the title of best husband, there's no debate over whether a current rake is unsuitable for a young lady. And, from Willoughby to Wickham to Crawford, I think we have a very clear idea of Jane Austen's ideas of how likely it is notably promiscuous men can reform. This does not preclude the possibility that her disparaging commentary around their lust is based more on over-indulgence or the class of women they seduce, but it's undoubtedly a condemnation of such men directly in line with the first part of what John Bennett says so it's no stretch to believe she saw merit in the follow-on conclusions of the second part as well. Whether she would view it with enough merit to consider celibacy the only respectable option for unmarried men is a bit unclearer.

I did consider that perhaps Jane Austen consciously treated this as a grey area where she couldn’t possibly know what young men did (the same reasoning is why we never see the men in the dining room after the ladies retire, etc) and so didn't hold an opinion on men's extramarital encounters with sex workers/lower-class women at all, but I think there actually are enough hints in her works that this isn’t the case. Though, unsurprisingly, given the delicacy of the subject, there’s no direct mention of sex workers or gentlemen having casual lovers from among the lower-classes in her texts.

That also prevents us from definitively knowing whether she thought extramarital sex was so common, and as unremarkable, as most gentlemen treated it. But we do see from her commentary around the consequences of Maria Bertram and Henry Crawford's elopement that she had criticism of the double standards men and women were held to when violating sexual virtue. Another indication that she perhaps expected good men to be capable of waiting until marriage in the way that she very clearly believed women should. At the very least, a man who often indulges in extramarital sex does not seem to be one who would be considered highly by Jane Austen.

She makes a point of saying, in regards to not liking his wife, that Mr Bennet “was not of a disposition to seek comfort for the disappointment which his own imprudence had brought on, in any of those pleasures which too often console the unfortunate for their folly or their vice.” This must include affairs, though cheating on a wife cannot be a 1:1 equivalent of single young men sleeping around before marriage. However, the latter is generally critically accepted to be one of the flaws that Darcy lays at Wickham’s door along with gambling when talking about their youth and his “vicious propensities" and "want of principle." Though this could be argued that it’s more the extent or publicity of it (but remembering that it couldn't be anything uncommon enough that it couldn't be hidden from Darcy Sr. or explained away) rather than the act itself, or maybe seductions instead of paying women offering those services. I also believe Persuasion mentioning Sunday travelling as proof of thoughtless/immoral activity supports the idea that Jane Austen might have been religious enough that she would never create a hero who had extramarital sex.

So, taken all together this would make Darcy potentially a virgin, or, since I couldn't find absolute evidence of her opinions, leave enough room that he isn’t but extramarital sex isn’t a regular (or perhaps recent) thing and he would never have had anything so established as a mistress.

I’ve also been wondering, if Darcy isn’t a virgin, who would he have slept with? I’ve been musing on arguments for and against each option for weeks at this point. No romantasy has ever made me think about a fictional man's sexual habits so much as the question of Darcy's sexual history. What is my life.

Sex workers are an obvious answer, and the visits wouldn’t have raised any eyebrows. Discretion was part of their job, it was a clean transaction with no further responsibilities towards them, and effective (and reusable, ew) condoms existed at this time so there was little risk of children and no ability to exactly determine the paternity even if there was an accident. It was a fairly ‘responsible’ choice if one wanted no strings attached. In opposition to this, syphilis was rampant at the time, and had been known to spread sexually for centuries. Sex workers were at greater risk of it than anyone else and so the more sensible and risk-averse someone is (and I think Mr Darcy would be careful) the less likely they would be to visit sex workers. Contracting something that was known as potentially deadly and capable of making a future wife infertile if it spread to her could make any intelligent and cautious man think twice.

Servants and tenants of the estate are another simple and common answer. Less risk of stds, it can be based on actual attraction more than money (though money might still change hands), and is a bit more intimate. But Wickham’s called wicked for something very similar, when he dallies (whether he only got to serious flirting, kissing, or sleeping with them I don’t think we can conclusively say) with the common women of Meryton: “his intrigues, all honoured with the title of seduction, had been extended into every tradesman's family.” And it isn't as though Wickham had any personal duty towards those people beyond the claims of basic dignity. Darcy, who is shown to have such respect and understanding for his responsibilities towards the people of his estate and duties of a landlord, would keenly feel if any of his actions were leading his servants/tenants astray and down immoral paths. Servants, especially, were considered directly under the protection of the family whose house they worked in. I think it's undoubtable that Mrs Reynolds (whose was responsible for the wellbeing - both physically and spiritually - of the female servants) would not think so well of Mr Darcy if he had experimented with maids in his youth. It would reflect badly on her if a family entrusted their daughter to her care and she 'lost her virtue' under her watch. Daughters/widows of others living on the estate not under the roof of Pemberley House are a little more likely, but still, if he did have an affair with any of them I can only think it possible when he was much younger and did not feel his duties quite so strongly. Of course lots of real men didn't care about any of this, but Darcy is so far from being depicted as careless about his duties that the narrative makes a point of how exceptional his quality of care was. Frankly, it's undeniable that none of Jane Austen's heroes were flippant about their responsibilities towards those under their protection. I cannot serious entertain an interpretation that makes Darcy not, at his current age, at least, cognizant of the contemporary problems inherent in sleeping with servants or others on his estate.

A servant in a friend’s house would remove some of that personal responsibility, but transfer it to instead be leading his friend’s servants astray and in a manner which he is less able to know about if a child did result. That latter remains a problem even if we move the setting to his college, so not particularly likely for his character as we know it… though it wouldn’t be unusual for someone to be more unthinking and reckless in their teenage years than they are at twenty-eight so I don’t think having sex then can be ruled out. Kissing I can much more easily believe, especially when at Oxford or Cambridge, but every scenario of sleeping with a lower-class woman has some compelling arguments against it especially the closer we get to the time of the novel.

Men did of course also have affairs with women of ranks similar to their own, though given Jane Austen’s well-known feelings towards men who ‘ruined’ the virtue of young ladies we can safely say that Darcy never slept with an unwed middle- or upper-class woman. Any decent man would have married them out of duty if it got so far; but if he was the sort to let it get so far, I think it impossible Jane Austen would consider him respectable. Widows are a possibility, but again, the respectable thing to do would be to marry them. Perhaps a poorer merchant’s widow would be low enough that marriage is off the table but high enough that the ‘leading astray’ aspect loses its master-servant responsibilities (though the male-female ‘protect the gentler sex’ aspect remains) but his social circle didn’t facilitate meeting many ladies like that. Plus, an affair with a woman in society would remove many layers of privacy and anonymity that sex-workers and lower-class lovers provided by simply being unremarkable to the world at large. It carries a far greater risk of scandal and a heavier sense of immorality in the terms of respecting a woman’s purity which classism prevented from applying so heavily to lower-class women.

I think it’s important to note here that something that removes the need to think about duties of landlords towards the lower-classes or gentlemen towards gentlewomen is having affairs with other men of a similar rank. But, aside from the risk of scandal and what could be called the irresponsibility of engaging in illegal acts, it’s almost certain that Jane Austen would never have supported this. For a devout author in this era the way I’m calculating likelihoods makes it not even a possibility. But if you want to write a different fanfiction (and perhaps something like a break-up could explain why Darcy doesn’t seem to have any closer friend than someone whom he must have only met two or so years ago despite being in society for years before that) it does have that advantage over affairs with women of equal- and lower-classes. I support alternate interpretations entirely – it just isn’t how I’m deciding things in this instance.

I keep coming back to the conclusion that, at the very least, Darcy hasn’t had sex recently and it was never a common occurrence. It wouldn’t surprise me if Jane Austen felt he hadn’t done it ever. Kissing, as we can see from all the parlour games at the time, wasn’t viewed as harshly, so I think he’s likely made out with someone before. But in almost every situation it does seem that the responsible and religious thing to do (which Jane Austen values so highly) is for it to never have progressed to sex. I also don’t think it conflicts with his canon characterisation to say that he wouldn’t regard sexual experience as a crucial element of his life thus far, and his personality isn’t driven to pursue pleasure for himself, so it’s entirely possible that he would never go out of his way to seek it. So, I’m inclined to think that the authorial and textual evidence is in favour of Darcy being a virgin even if the real-world contemporary standard is the opposite. (Though both leave enough room for exceptions that I’m not going to argue with anyone who feels differently; and even if you agree with all my points, you might simply weight authorial intent/textual evidence/contemporary likelihoods differently than I do and come to a different conclusion).

Remember that even if Darcy is a virgin this wouldn’t necessarily equate to lack of knowledge, only experience. There were plenty of books and artwork focused on sex, and Darcy, studious man that he is, would no doubt pay attention to what knowledge his friends/male relatives shared. Though some of it (Looking especially at you, 'Fanny Hill, Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure') should NEVER be an example of appropriate practice for taking a woman's virginity. Darcy would almost certainly have been taught directly or learnt through exposure to other men talking to make sex good for a woman – it was a commonly held misconception (since Elizabethan England, I believe) that women had to orgasm to conceive. It would be in his interests as an empathetic husband, and head of a family, to know how to please his wife.

Basically, I’m convinced Darcy isn’t very experienced, if at all, and will be learning with Elizabeth. But he does have a lot of theoretical knowledge which he’s paid careful attention to and is eager to apply.

[hestzhyen]

Chapter 73 Sob Posting

Head in my hands, heart crushed, brain only sending sad signals. Let's go dear void- it's time to cry again.

Editor's notes: First Page: 破られた記憶の封印... [yabura reta kioku no fuuin...] "The seal on (their) memories has been rent asunder..." This doesn't specify whose memories, exactly, are unsealed but we can infer based on what's been happening the past few chapters that we are seeing both Samura and Iori's memories at once to tell a cohesive story. The audience gets to know everything even though the characters have things only they know and all that. It's my interpretation at least. Last Page: 国重殺害により現実味が増す"蠱"座村は... [Kunishige satsugai ni yori genjitsumi ga masu "kodoku" Samura wa...] "With Kunishige's murder, the "Malediction" becomes much more real to Samura...

Thank goodness VIZ translated the text on the colour page for once so I don't have to. Congratulations to the contest winners! Also, 925 entry submissions for a manga without an anime for this kind of contest is pretty crazy. Kagurabachi is definitely going to be a WSJ mainstay.

Small note before we begin: the title of the chapter in Japanese is 黎明 [reimei], "Daybreak", same as in EN. It can mean "dawn of a new age" as well, which I think has some connection to what happened this chapter. There are plenty of words for dawn/daybreak in Japanese (明け方 [akegata], 夜明け [yoake], 暁 [akatsuki], etc.) but reimei was the one chosen, y'know? My guess is due to the Hishaku successfully engineering what seems to be the beginning of the end...

Iori

Oh my god this poor kid.

It's not, but it's also not your fault at all...

She's so strong trying to bear the bullying on her own. She's smart, too, for realising that her dad will send her away if he catches on to what she's trying her best to endure. So she lies with a smile to protect the little bit of happiness she has.

Iori loses her mom to something no one can control, then tries to control what she can to keep the dad she came to love after all by her side. She only wants to live with him no matter what it costs her. How can a person's heart not break for Iori? She's being bullied by her classmates, the adults are enabling it, people are trashing her home all the time, and she still wants to stay so she doesn't have to lose someone else.

No kid should have to suffer like this and I want to give Iori a huge hug for doing her best under supremely shitty circumstances. Once again, much like Hakuri and Chihiro, we see a kid suffering the consequences of bullshit going on among the adults. Kagurabachi is many things and "a story that examines the impacts and consequences of older generations' issues on the younger ones" is one of them.

The interesting thing to look forward to now that my heart has been thoroughly minced into fine particulate matter: who is Iori's aunt in the Kamunabi? Is it the woman she was living with, or since it was specifically her mom's younger sister, could the theories of this lady being her aunt come true?

NAME, PLEASE?!

She's the only one of the three folks who sealed the Shinuchi we haven't seen pop back up yet- Prince Nez got a surprise showing last chapter, Beard guy was in the panel of the treaty being signed. I like the theory of her being the aunt mostly because it would help us segue back into checking on the folks we left off at Kamunabi HQ. We simply don't know yet though, so... more waiting.

Poor Iori, though. Separated from her parent again and she couldn't do anything about it in the end. But I can't really blame Samura for his decision to upset her so badly.

Before we move on, though... the first of more-than-usual TL notes.

Iori...! You'll find happiness again soon, I hope!

"Six months" is incorrect, it should be "year and a half". Iori lived with Samura for a year while her mom was in the hospital and this chapter takes place roughly six months after Inori died. The JP was correct, as was French and Spanish, so this is an EN-only error apparently.

Samura

I sure as hell woke up when I got to translating this part at like 4 am.

He fears for her so much that he's worried she'll fucking hang herself. His anxiety is definitely overblown here, but that's a parent's worst nightmare isn't it? To find their child committed suicide... unless they're Kyora, who wouldn't have minded much if Hakuri's suicidal leap in ch. 24 had succeeded. Fortunately (or unfortunately) Samura's got different failings as a father and he makes the most rational decision he can: he removes Iori from his home to live with her aunt. To spare her from his issues and having to suffer consequences she doesn't deserve. If anything, Samura doesn't deserve her.

There are some extremely cool comparisons we can make between Samura and Kunishige now. Both war veterans with literal skeletons in their closet who didn't necessarily want their kid to emulate them. Both teaching their kid their craft despite some having some reservations. Both loving their kid a hell of a lot. But where Kunishige wanted to walk Chihiro through every step of learning about the world -including the "not so bright and shiny stuff"-, Samura tries to shield Iori by sending her away and abandoning her again.

I can't be mad at him for doing that even if it's such a heart-wrenchingly painful thing to see happen to Iori. She was crying herself to sleep and being worn down by the resentment towards her father echoing down to her as well. Living with her dad was a kind of happiness for her, but it was a huge risk too. Even if she didn't hang herself like he feared she would still be deeply affected by so much negativity aimed at them both. So Samura did the responsible thing by sending her away to somewhere safer even if it broke his little girl's heart. Part of being an adult is making difficult decisions like that and credit to him, he did it.

I can't fault him for any of his actions that he took before he went off the deep end in the present either. I mean, really:

Protect the father for the sake of the son... sorry, Shiba, I know you tried your best.

Samura didn't try to keep this burden to himself! He talked to his superior and informed him about everything John told him, who spread the word to at least a few other folks who could do something about it. He asked Shiba to look after the Rokuhiras. And he tried to be a proactive presence in Iori's life even if he was awkward around her.

Samura did everything right and still lost.

My personal theory is that the Hishaku targeted Samura for this plan because he'd be the easiest to manipulate. His negative feelings are strong- anxiety, grief, guilt, self-hatred, etc. That makes him easy to predict. Maybe telling Samura was vital to the plan because all these dominoes needed to fall and he was the right piece to push first. In other words, they knew he'd inform everyone and relied on that to make this catastrophic prediction come true.

Regardless of what we learn, it's hard not to feel for Samura when he was genuinely doing everything he could to protect the people he cares for. He made responsible moves based on what he knew and didn't try to tackle it alone. The reason for how he came to be so misguided in the present is bright and clear now- each step he's taken in his life so far has been logical, responsible, and with good intentions. But losing so much despite doing the right thing at every turn amplified all his negative traits and feelings. So he decided -again, with clear and sober reasoning- that he needed to tackle the root of the issue by himself. Kill the Master Swordsman, kill the Kamunabi's mole, kill the other Bearers, kill the Hishaku, kill himself. Kill everything that's causing problems and restore peace. He's drowning in despair over this Malediction prediction coming to pass and will stop it by any means necessary. That's my impression anyway.

An observation before we move on:

Bad news...

The change of seasons here gives us a rough timeline of when Chihiro and Shiba visited before Kunishige's murder. In the preceding page they're all wearing clothing for spring or autumn- long sleeves but no coats (other than Samura's unkempt suit) and the plants in the backgrounds are full of foliage. Then we transition to this page with a bare branch to show us that it's late fall/winter when Samura gets the news. So anywhere between a month to about six passed and Kunishige died late in the year or early in the next one.

Aaaaand a small TL note because this is impossible to really bring across in EN:

Heckin' punks.

Glasses guy says the same thing in the second panel in Japanese: あっ 座村 but this is giga turbo maximum disrespect towards our favourite blind guy. Not using a -san honorific for someone older than you is incredibly rude, and it speaks volumes for how these kids see Samura even before the other guy gives his little speech.

It's related to this scene:

Samura I can't believe I'm saying this, but you have nothing to apologise for.

These guys in the background watching Samura fall over himself to apologise for Iori fighting with his student's kid don't have a great impression of him. And neither does the guy he's teaching and apologising to! The kids bullying Iori heard all that slander from their parents and are using it to torment her. The adults are being duplicitous and respecting Samura to his face since he still has that War Hero status, but they've got doubts and issues with him in private that their kids are picking up on. Iori's getting all the blowback since she's just a child who can't slice them to ribbons and Samura fucking hates that, as he should- which only amplifies those guilty feelings he never quite got rid of.

Lastly, just one small thing I found amusing:

Samura, eternally Going Through Some Things

Samura refers to Yura as 奴 [yatsu], "that guy (derogatory or familiar)". Since Samura's not exactly chums with Yura it's more like "That bastard's been spreading that story?".

The Hishaku

I wanted to murder John and Hatshaku myself after translating wall of text after wall of text this chapter. May God rest the official translator's soul.

So, first up, a translation note... 民族浄化 [minzokujouka], "ethnic cleansing" never appeared in John's explanation here in the original. There wasn't even verbiage alluding to the incident in that way. The text in the bubble was:

町にばら撤いたのは 条約と剣聖の事件の一連を記した文書と条約の調印式の偽造写真 "We scattered leaflets around town... detailing the treaty and the Sword Master incident, as well as forged photos of the treaty signing ceremony." I wonder what the official EN TL was going for here. 事故 [jiken] is a neutral term simply meaning "accident/incident" or "circumstances"- the official Spanish and French translations also didn't include the "ethnic cleansing" terminology. That's a pretty loaded concept to include by mistake, you know?

At any rate, John's been carefully laying the foundation for years now. We still don't know exactly why he's doing this but he's patient as hell and willing to do things slowly so they're done right. I'm all in on bets for him using Samura and telling him about the prediction to ensure that the Malediction event happens- dollars to doughnuts he's going to be the one who causes it, assuming it's not thwarted by Chihiro et. al.

I appreciate the writing for this nefarious plot quite a bit. Hokazono-sensei understands how these plots usually unfold through careful manipulation instead of an obvious misinformation campaign that somehow totally wins over the populace. What's important isn't to get the truth out right away but to plant seeds one by one- first sow doubt, then build mistrust, so on and so forth. This is very true to life and honestly just as scary as whatever the Sword Master's got going on with Magatsumi. The Hishaku are deadly serious about this plan with the patience to see it through.

Okay, dear void... no idea what we'll see next, but I'm comfortably strapped in and ready for whatever it is. Hopefully I can reassemble my heart in time for it to be shattered again. Take care of yourself this week and give yourself a little praise, just as a treat.

[daeneryscel]

fiction mimics reality in the sense that mary i is remembered as ‘bloody mary’ despite having only executed 300+ people during her reign as opposed to her father who executed 50,000+ people during his. cut to rhaenyra who is remembered as ‘maegor with teats’ because she raised taxes after tyland lannister hid the royal treasury right before she retook king’s landing; all while her half-brother aemond was complicit in massacring the riverlands and the wiping out of house strong, along with her *other* half-brother daeron being liable for the atrocities that are bitterbridge/both battles of tumbleton. funny how that works.

[krashlite]

I think that c!Jimmy liked being a Bad Boy and a Big Dog because for once in this series a role let him be reckless without being mocked/put down by his allies and without truly harming anyone through the risks he took. In this essay I will explore his character through this lens

LONG post under the cut!

Jimmy is an extremely optimistic character, almost always seen smiling and laughing about whatever’s going on. Not in the sense that he laughs when he’s nervous, but in the sense that he makes light of whatever scenario he’s in. On a deeper level, this also translates into overconfidence in a glass-half-full type of way. If there’s a chance a plan could go south, he only focuses on the potential benefit. If there’s a chance he loses a fight, he only focuses on winning

This isn’t to say he’s unaware of negative outcomes, he just chooses to ignore them. The result is him making poor decisions over, and over, and over again. Jimmy knows exactly why he did that but from an outside perspective he’s regarded as stupid

This is seen as early as 3rd life, with Scott practically putting him on a leash to stop him from fighting Ren and his army. Specifically when they manage to chase Dogwarts away from Joel’s base, Jimmy goes to give chase and Scott immediately stops him. They’ve won, and he doesn’t understand why Jimmy would push it further. Jimmy, on the other hand, is thinking about how they’ve been chased across the map like rabbits and knows DW will be back unless they establish themselves as a threat. Now’s the perfect time, since they have the upper hand

But again, Scott doesn’t see this. In his mind, the battle is won and they shouldn’t expend more time, energy, or resources on it. Ultimately he doesn’t want to see Jimmy hurt and believes that restricting what Jimmy does will protect him from harm

I think this shows a fundamental difference in how they interact with the world. Scott’s more practical- he only does what he feels is necessary and is humble enough to know when the risk isn’t worth the reward. Jimmy, on the other hand, wants to test the limits and see what he’s able to accomplish through, once again, taking unnecessary risks.

But this is where things get messy

Again, there is a fundamental difference in their thought processes. This causes them to clash, and since Scott is the one who held more “power” in the relationship (being the one to decide many aspects of their base and being the one to make most deals and plans for the both of them), resulted in Scott putting Jimmy down A Lot. This started with Jimmy returning from the desert without several of the armor pieces he left with and continued throughout the war.

Jimmy, in response to this treatment, started acting More reckless as a means to prove himself. He wanted to be seen as just as strong, smart, and capable as the people around him. Ultimately, he wanted to be respected in his own right, and that didn’t really happen this season!

Nor did it happen in LL,

LL was an entire mess for so many reasons and most of it was due to the game mechanic itself. Lives being treated as currency caused rifts in many alliances, especially the Southlands

This coupled with the fact that Jimmy is already back in 3L habits, trying to prove himself constantly, makes an incredibly messy situation. His efforts in monopolizing sugar cane are downplayed and mocked, he spends so much time getting spyglasses just for Mumbo to lose them. These are meant to be harmless jokes (and really, they are) but Jimmy’s coming off of an unbalanced power dynamic and a tiny bit of it eats away at him and he can’t figure out Why.

Jimmy doesn’t understand why he doesn’t feel valued in the team, so he starts looking at arbitrary reasons Why. The reason he settles on is the life count, with Grian’s death making it known that Yellow-Names are on the brink of being exiled.

This comes back to the game mechanic. Jimmy sees Martyn with four lives, with the ability to either a) bring Grian back to Yellow or b) offer a Yellow-Name in the alliance a life to keep them safe, and Martyn Doesn’t. This tells Jimmy that Martyn either doesn’t trust him or doesn’t value him enough to even attempt to protect him

I think this was even voiced a couple of times during LL, with Martyn closely guarding his lives and finding every reason he could to justify it (he was fully in the right for keeping them, even if doing so hurt others). Jimmy backed off, but there was just a small amount of bitterness that lingered

With Martyn, I think Jimmy picked up on the fact that Martyn was more concerned with protecting his Alliance than the people in it. He needed a group around him, but wasn’t terribly concerned with them otherwise

And that’s what fueled his decision to steal the life. If Martyn doesn’t respect him, if he doesn’t trust him, if he doesn’t care enough to protect him, why should Jimmy do the same. Why should he be a human shield for someone who barely looks his way. Impulse and Mumbo could stay if they wanted, but he wasn’t going to

Which makes it hurt so much more when Martyn asks to run away with him, when Martyn says he cares about Jimmy more than anyone else in the alliance. I want to remind you, Jimmy’s an optimist. He looks at the half-full cup. He doesn’t consider Martyn could be lying because he wanted so badly to just be Seen. So Jimmy gives it back

As it turns out, Martyn was lying. He calls him an idiot, and Jimmy is exiled immediately

All the resolve that Jimmy had in stealing the life crumbles then and there. He starts hanging around the Southlands alliance like a lost puppy, basically begging them to take him back. Martyn’s little ruse inadvertently showed Jimmy that, really, all he wanted is to be valued and supported. The life counts stops being an issue because he’s able to recognize the real issue- he feels undervalued and he feels stupid

That’s a factor even after the Southlands reunites, after he’s almost unanimously voted back in but Grian’s insistent on a recount. I think it’s the main reason why he’s so risky when he goes down to red- with him falling for a trap that he easily could have avoided

Again, it’s the same as 3L. He feels disrespected and undervalued so he takes unnecessary risks in order to prove to himself and to others that he’s just as strong, just as smart, and just as capable as they are.

This is later coupled with Mumbo’s extreme bloodlust when he turns Red. On Red, Mumbo was needlessly violent and is basically the only Red to swing at anything that moved. And I do mean Needlessly violent, he got himself and others into several dicey scenarios because he was impulsive and wanted to Stab. He gave the server a reason to be cautious of Mumbo and any other Red-Name. If Mumbo was a loose cannon, how would others be?

Except Mumbo was only aggressive towards Non-Reds (obviously) and was otherwise supportive of those on his side

I think this actually greatly influenced Skizz’s decision to leave BEST behind, with him seeing Mumbo as someone worth defending/standing by. Not only was he a visibly strong ally with a reputation, he genuinely cared for and supported those who were at his side. In Skizz’s case, he offered a source of stability where BEST couldn’t, and I think the same is true for Jimmy.

Jimmy sees this, and sees Mumbo as someone who can both show him how to be dangerous and respect his abilities in this game. Mumbo was respected as a threat and genuinely cared for those in his company. So he’s the perfect ally, right?

Actually, no, and this isn’t where the Skizz comparison ends either. Remember, Mumbo created the reputation that Reds are a worthy threat and that they’re violent without cause (“oh but what about Joel?” Joel was a joke at best and an annoyance at worst. He I think he definitely did influence Mumbo’s actions but that’s another essay entirely). Mumbo influenced Skizz’s aggression this season, with him becoming more bold in who he threatened or even attacked

So how does this compare to Jimmy? Both of them were coming off of alliances where they were unsupported, so they leaned more into Mumbo’s habits- good and bad. Except they didn’t really see it. Good traits were associated with Mumbo, their friend, and bad traits were associated with their shared condition, their Red-Life.

The plan to trap the bunker played on both, but was coupled with Jimmy’s bad habit of shooting for the best possible outcome. Mumbo had previously turned tail and ran whenever a plan went south, but that’s not how Jimmy is. Jimmy only focuses on the possible gain and ignores possible dangers. When the trap didn’t set off, he insisted on pushing Grian into it. And that actually goes back to him trying to chase Ren’s army- he didn’t know when to call it quits

And of course this causes both of their deaths. To Jimmy, his death caused Mumbo’s. He caused the death of the one ally who actually stood by him. I think this is when he fully internalizes criticism from 3L and LL as a whole. He feels weak, he feels stupid, he doesn’t feel nearly as capable as those around him.

And this carries into DL

Except DL was a much different season than the previous two. The soulmate mechanic in DL meant that you and your ally have to rely on each other, you have to support each other because failing to do so will surely spell your doom

Not only that, but Jimmy was finally paired with a supportive ally from the start. They made their base together because they trusted the other to build more than they trusted themself. When Jimmy came back with cows, Tango’s immediate response was to exclaim “you’re amazing!!!” Instead of criticizing him like previous alliances had- even back in 3L!! This is the first time Jimmy got a fully positive response to his efforts. Tango was overwhelmingly supportive towards Jimmy and Jimmy returned the favor. The base didn’t look perfect, but it was theirs. The server didn’t want them to have a horn so they devised a plan to get one.

Tango had also been following a similar arc up until now- with him being undervalued by his alliances. Except in those alliances, he was pushed to the side or physically harmed instead of being an object of ridicule. I think this is part of why it isn’t really out of place for them to meet through dying. Tango was expecting to be harmed and so was Jimmy, so neither of them blame the other

With Tango being pushed to the side, he also shied away from leadership positions, finding it more comfortable to follow. This paired well with how Jimmy typically takes charge of things, with Jimmy making most plans for the both of them (most, not all)

But again, this is where things get messy

Remember, Jimmy uses risks to prove his worth. He wants to see what he can do, but is also still recovering from previous seasons. He still thinks he’s the reason why him and Mumbo died, and doesn’t want to cause the death another ally, especially one who loves him. Instead of staying careful, he devises a plan to steal livestock, to steal Scar’s horse. It’s for the ranch, it’s for Tango

I think Jimmy realizes the problem when the Ranch is burned. He’s forced to confront this when he sees Tango fly into a rage and almost try to fight a group of people he’d surely lose to. Jimmy cannot be reckless here, he has to talk Tango down from the proverbial ledge.

With this, the roles end up reversing, with Tango being the reckless one and Jimmy trying to steer him to be more tactical. And Jimmy is So careful about this too, not wanting to act like Scott or the Southlands. Because of that he never actually tells Tango no on his dangerous plans- ESPECIALLY the plan to release Rancher’s Revenge, the warden- but instead suggests ways to make the plan better

The dilemma here is that Jimmy needs to choose between being risky and being safe. Both would benefit Tango, except Jimmy knows from experience how much it hurts to be bound in bubble-wrap all the time

Jimmy sees no way to avoid risks without hurting Tango. So instead of fighting against that part of himself, Jimmy leans into it. He accepts it as a key tenet of his identity, even as it puts the both of them in harms way. Yes they went down in the end, but they went down together, Always Together.

It didn’t matter if Jimmy was a “worthy” ally, he didn’t need to be Smart, he didn’t need to be Strong, he didn’t even need to be Capable. He learned that he deserved love not in spite of his flaws, but alongside his flaws.

And this is the lesson he carries into the next two Seasons, with both alliances being fully centered on being reckless

The Bad Boys acted dangerously, but they acted as a unit- ESPECIALLY him and Joel. Bad Boys dig straight down, Bad Boys water bucket clutch from the build limit, Bad Boys care about each other not in spite of endangering themselves, but because of it

And this is because Joel had a nearly identical arc. Joel in previous seasons had a habit of acting recklessly in the same way Jimmy did, and was cast aside because of it. In 3L he ended up a Lone Wolf, in LL he was forced into a position where he’s the villain, and in DL he and Etho leaned into the danger in the same way Jimmy and Tango did. Their stories run parallel so it only makes sense that they’re the ones who end up supporting each other in LimL

And Joel was Jimmy’s main source of support that season, with Grian representing the criticism of previous seasons. This gave Jimmy the ability to confront said criticisms through, again, leaning into them. He did something stupid? Yes, but him and Joel were having fun. A plan went south because of unnecessary risks? Yes, but Joel was being risky with him. Joel gave Jimmy the ability to basically cut through the aforementioned “bubble wrap” Grian was trying to put around them

And I think it’s also important to mention Grian did this out of both love and cowardice, not malice. Ultimately he didn’t want to lose either of them and was trying to keep them alive longer. But because Grian never learned the lesson they did- that it’s more important to act together than to survive alone- Grian chooses survival and ends up alone.

Anyways, recklessness being the foundation of Jimmy’s alliances carries into SL as well

Jimmy was on the brink of death for almost the entire season, man was not thriving whatsoever and that was known. Funnily enough, he ends up with Martyn, who again was previously more concerned with his own safety than the people around him

But Martyn is just coming off of a victory, of finally achieving the very thing he’d been working towards and the thing he centered his motivations on. Without that goal, he’s left with his methods- which was mostly having dangerous ideas and seeing them through

With Jimmy, Martyn introduced plans that involved them being risky and in everyone else’s faces. This, to Jimmy, echoed both Joel and Tango’s behavior. He was able to fully settle into the fact that, for him, good things come from being reckless, from shooting for the best possible outcome and refusing to back down

Jimmy maintains his optimism and his recklessness, traits that had previously been challenged but traits he stubbornly holds onto and values in his Life

[booberrybawls]

sweating bullets eyes rolling What if you were death and you stole away my firstborn child with gentle hands and left me crying in the woods & then I killed enough people that you should have been appeased for good, but death is always hungry so when I picked up a stray by the scruff of its neck of course you came for my second child, and I couldn't run anymore so I took your face in my hands-- you were death--- and we kissed with tongue and your hands were still gentle when you buried my body under flowers. happened to my good friend agatha harkness

[quaxslay]

No dialogue has ever hit me as a trans person quite like Nimona saying, if she couldn’t shapeshift, “I wouldn’t die die. I just sure wouldn’t be living.”

It’s exactly what we mean when we say that transition and trans healthcare is necessary and lifesaving. Transition can mean the difference between simply being alive and actually being able to live.

[blueskittlesart]

I've heard that while most people really really love BotW and TotK, some people hate those two for going open-world, and some people hate TotK specifically for something about the story. As the resident Zelda expert I know of, what do you think of those takes?

"something about the story" is a bit too vague for me to answer--if you look at my totk liveblog tag from back when the game was newly released or my general zelda analysis tag you may be able to find some of my in-depth thoughts about the story of totk, but in general i liked it.

the open world thing though is something i can and will talk about for hours. (I am obsessed with loz and game design and this is an essay now <3) breath of the wild is a game that was so well-received that a lot of the criticism from older fans who were expecting something closer to the classic zelda formula was just kind of immediately drowned out and ignored, and while i don't think it's a valid criticism to suggest that botw strayed too far from its origins in going open-world, i am more than willing to look into those criticisms, why they exist, and why i think going open-world was ultimately the best decision botw devs could have made. (totk is a slightly different story, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.)

Loz is a franchise with a ton of history and a ton of really, REALLY dedicated fans. it's probably second only to mario in terms of recognizability and impact in nintendo's catalog. To us younger fans, the older games can sometimes seem, like, prehistoric when compared to what we're used to nowadays, but it's important to remember just how YOUNG the gaming industry is and how rapidly it's changed and grown. the first zelda game was released in 1986, which was 31 years before botw came out in 2017. What this means for nintendo and its developers is that they have to walk a very fine line between catering to older fans in their 30s and 40s now who would have been in nintendo's prime demographic when the first few games in the franchise were coming out AND making a game that's engaging to their MODERN target demographic and that age group's expectations for what a gaming experience should look like.

LOZ is in kind of a tough spot when it comes to modernizing, because a lot of its core gameplay elements are very much staples of early RPGs, and a lot of those gameplay elements have been phased out of modern RPGs for one reason or another. gathering collectibles, fighting one's way through multilevel, mapless dungeons, and especially classic zelda's relative lack of guidance through the story are all things that date games and which modern audiences tend to get frustrated with. for the last few releases before botw, the devs had kind of been playing with this -- skyward sword in particular is what i consider their big experiment and what (i think) became the driving force behind a lot of what happened with botw. Skyward sword attempted to solve the issues I listed by, basically, making the map small and the story much, much more blatantly linear. Skyward sword feels much more like other modern rpgs to me than most zelda games in terms of its playstyle, because the game is constantly pushing you to do specific things. this is a common storytelling style in modern RPGs--obviously, the player usually needs to take specific actions in order to progress the story, and so when there's downtime between story sections the supporting characters push the player towards the next goal. but this actually isn't what loz games usually do. in the standard loz formula, you as the player are generally directly given at most 4 objectives. these objectives will (roughly) be as follows: 1. go through some dungeons and defeat their bosses, 2. claim the master sword, 3. go through another set of dungeons and defeat their bosses, 4. defeat the final boss of the game. (not necessarily in that order, although that order is the standard formula.) the ONLY time the player will be expressly pushed by supporting characters towards a certain action (excluding guide characters) is when the game is first presenting them with those objectives. in-between dungeons and other gameplay segments, there's no sense of urgency, no one pushing you onto the next task. this method of storytelling encourages players to take their time and explore the world they're in, which in turn helps them find the collectibles and puzzles traditionally hidden around the map that will make it easier for them to continue on. Skyward sword, as previously mentioned, experimented with breaking this formula a bit--its overworld was small and unlocked sequentially, so you couldn't explore it fully without progressing the narrative, and it gave players a "home base" to return to in skyloft which housed many of the puzzles and collectibles rather than scattering them throughout the overworld. This method worked... to an extent, but it also meant that skyward sword felt drastically different in its storytelling and how its narrative was presented to the player than its predecessors. this isn't necessarily a BAD thing, but i am of the opinion that one of zelda's strongest elements has always been the level of immersion and relatability its stories have, and the constant push to continue the narrative has the potential to pull players out of your story a bit, making skyward sword slightly less engaging to the viewer than other games in the franchise. (to address the elephant in the room, there were also obviously some other major issues with the design of sksw that messed with player immersion, but imo even if the control scheme had been perfect on the first try, the hyperlinear method would STILL have been less engaging to a player than the standard exploration-based zeldas.)

So when people say that botw was the first open-world zelda, I'm not actually sure how true I personally believe that is. I think a lot of the initial hype surrounding botw's open map were tainted by what came before it--compared to the truly linear, intensely restricted map of skyward sword, botw's map feels INSANE. but strictly speaking, botw actually sticks pretty closely to the standard zelda gameplay experience, at least as far as the overworld map is concerned. from the beginning, one of the draws of loz is that there's a large, populated map that you as the player can explore (relatively) freely. it was UNUSUAL for the player to not have access to almost the entire map either immediately or very quickly after beginning a new zelda game. (the size and population of these maps was restricted by software and storage capabilities in earlier games, but pretty muhc every zelda game has what would have been considered a large & well populated map at the time of its release.) what truly made botw different was two things; the first being the sheer SIZE of the map and the second being the lack of dungeons and collectibles in a traditional sense. Everything that needs to be said about the size of the map already has been said: it's huge and it's crazy and it's executed PERFECTLY and it's never been done before and every game since has been trying to replicate it. nothing much else to say there. but I do want to talk about the percieved difference in gameplay as it relates to the open-world collectibles and dungeons, because, again, i don't think it's actually as big of a difference as people seem to think it is.

Once again, let's look at the classic formula. I'm going to start with the collectibles and lead into the dungeons. The main classic collectible that's a staple of every zelda game pre-botw is the heart piece. This is a quarter of a heart that will usually be sitting out somewhere in the open world or in a dungeon, and will require the player to either solve a puzzle or perform a specific action to get. botw is the first game to not include heart pieces... TECHNICALLY. but in practice, they're still there, just renamed. they're spirit orbs now, and rather than being hidden in puzzles within the overworld (with no explanation as to how or why they ended up there, mind you) they're hidden within shrines, and they're given a clear purpose for existing throughout hyrule and for requiring puzzle-solving skills to access. Functionally, these two items are exactly the same--it's an object that gives you an extra heart container once you collect four of them. no major difference beyond a reskin and renaming to make the object make sense within the greater world instead of just having a little ❤️ floating randomly in the middle of their otherwise hyperrealistic scenery. the heart piece vs spirit orb i think is a good microcosm of the "it's too different" criticisms of botw as a whole--is it ACTUALLY that different, or is it just repackaged in a way that doesn't make it immediately obvious what you're looking at anymore? I think it's worth noting that botw gives a narrative reason for that visual/linguistic disconnect from other games, too--it's set at minimum TEN THOUSAND YEARS after any other given game. while we don't have any concrete information about how much time passes between new-incarnation games, it's safe to assume that botw is significantly further removed from other incarnations of hyrule/link/zelda/etc than any other game on the timeline. It's not at all inconceivable within the context of the game that heart pieces may have changed form or come to be known by a different name. most of the changes between botw and other games can be reasoned away this way, because most of them have SOME obvious origins in a previous game mechanic, it's just been updated for botw's specific setting and narrative.

The dungeons ARE an actual departure from the classic formula, i will grant you. the usual way a zelda dungeon works is that link enters the dungeon, solves a few puzzles, fights a mini boss at about the halfway point, and after defeating the mini boss he gets a dungeon item which makes the second half of the dungeon accessible. He then uses that item in the dungeon's final boss fight, which is specifically engineered with that item in mind as the catalyst to win it. Botw's dungeons are the divine beasts. we've removed the presence of mini-bosses entirely, because the 'dungeon items' aren't something link needs to get within the dungeon itself--he alredy has them. they're the sheikah slate runes: magnesis, cryonis, stasis, and remote bombs. Each of the divine beast blight battles is actually built around using one of these runes to win it--cryonis to break waterblight's ice projectiles, magnesis to strike down thunderblight with its own lightning rods, remote bombs to take out fireblight's shield. (i ASSUME there's some way to use stasis effectively against windblight, mostly because it's obvious to me that that's how all the other fights were designed, but in practice it's the best strategy for that fight is to just slow down time via aerial archery, so i've never tried to win that way lol.) So even though we've removed traditional dungeon items and mini-boss fights, the bones of the franchise remain unchanged underneath. this is what makes botw such an ingenious move for this franchise imo; the fact that it manages to update itself into such a beautiful, engaging, MODERN game while still retaining the underlying structure that defines its franchise and the games that came before it. botw is an effective modern installment to this 30-year-old franchise because it takes what made the old games great and updates it in a way that still stays true to the core of the franchise.

I did mention totk in my opening paragraph and you mention it in your ask so i have to come back to it somehow. Do i think that totk did the gigantic-open-world thing as well as botw did? no. But i also don't really think there was any other direction to go with that game specifically. botw literally changed the landscape of game development when it was released. I KNOW you all remember how for a good year or two after botw's release, EVERY SINGLE GAME that came out HAD to have a massive open-world map, regardless of whether or not that actually made sense for that game. (pokemon is still suffering from the effects of that botw-driven open world craze to this day. rip scarlet/violet your gameplay was SUCH dogshit) I'm not sure to what degree nintendo and the botw devs anticipated that success, (I remember the open world and the versatility in terms of problem-solving being the two main advertising angles pre-release, but it's been 7 years. oh jesus christ it's been SEVEN YEARS. anyways) but in any case, there's basically NO WAY that they anticipated their specific gameplay style taking off to that degree. That's not something you can predict. When creating totk, they were once again walking that line between old and new, but because they were only 3ish years out from botw when totk went into development, they were REALLY under pressure to stay true to what it was that had made botw such an insane success. I think that's probably what led to the expanded map in the sky and depths as well as the fuse/build mechanics--they basically took their two big draws from botw, big map and versatility, and said ok BIGGER MAP and MORE VERSATILITY. Was this effective? yeah. do i think they maybe could have made a more engaging and well-rounded game if they'd been willing to diverge a little more from botw? also yeah. I won't say that I wanted totk to be skyward sword-style linear, because literally no one wanted that, but I do think that because of the insane wave of success that botw's huge open world brought in the developers were under pressure to stay very true to botw in their designing the gameplay of totk, and I think that both the gameplay and story might have been a bit more engaging if they had been allowed to experiment a little more in their delivery of the material.

[paceywittters]

yes, i do think lucy has fault in their relationship breakdown - happy to talk about that elsewhere if you want

okay, so @to-the-east asked me to expand on this thought from my other post and while i know this is an unpopular opinion on a beloved character, i don’t mind talking about it (even if it’s become a really polarizing thing for the rookie fandom). the fact that lucy's flaws get looked over in favor of constant praise for her actions is kind of odd to me.

a note before you see how long this is: this is just my opinion about a tv show, i am allowed to have it just like you are allowed to have yours! if you don't agree with me that is ok i will be fine and so will you. please don't come at me for typing my little essays, if you've been here long enough u know i just like to yap.

also just to be clear: i think lucy's a great character. i think she's good at her job. she deserves happiness personally and professionally in whatever way that looks like for her. i also, however, recognize that as a three-dimensional character, lucy's flawed - and i like that she's flawed. i want the show to delve further into those flaws the way they do with basically every other character rather than pretending they're not there. me saying lucy has flaws is not an attack on her character. it is observation and analysis of the source material. that is all.

ok now you may proceed if you want lol

some chenford fans looked at the breakup in season six and saw tim’s issues, tim’s faults, tim’s lies, etc. as the root cause - and they were absolutely part of the cause, but there were bigger things at play than just what was happening in the moment. tim’s knee-jerk reaction to his deception/inability to see himself in his actions/breach of his moral code during 6x06 was to break up with lucy, because he didn’t know who he was. he couldn’t trust himself with himself, so he certainly couldn’t trust himself with her. we’ve all heard this a hundred times over, i’m sure, but it’s worth repeating because i actually think the breakup happening like this did a major disservice to the characters. while i wanted a breakup, after sitting with the way it’s played out, this breakup didn’t scratch the itch for me, so to speak.

throughout the end of season 5 and the beginning of season 6, tim and lucy both wind up facing a major shift in their lives. they decide to be together in 5x08/5x09, and this is where we begin to see the…lack of consequences, more or less, for lucy’s actions specifically.

just to reiterate, because i'm about to sound harsh: i want lucy to succeed, and i want her to grow. i am not trying to say lucy should have to face consequences for things while others shouldn’t - this isn’t meant to be a comparison to anyone else in the cast, but an analysis of what we’ve seen laid out in front of us.

throughout the show’s run, lucy’s had fairly good luck when it comes to not facing disciplinary action when she should’ve - but this goes absolutely batshit crazy in season 5 and 6. in the span of a season, lucy:

breaks up with her boyfriend of at least 6 months who has been expressing interest in living with her, giving little to no reason re: why (regardless of how you feel about chris, this should've have some kind of consequence or challenge attached)

begins dating her superior officer in secret without disclosing that information appropriately despite knowing she is supposed to legally (skirting around rules, ultimately without any consequence)

devises an inter-departmental swap with a group of colleagues in order to find a way to benefit her personal life without consulting tim, who this would directly impact (she does eventually face a professional consequence for this, but not a personal one)

expresses no remorse to tim when she gets caught and he is, rightfully, irritated (she quite literally says “sorry, not sorry”)

learns that someone within the inter-departmental swap is not happy that she’s manipulated a bunch of people for her personal gain and doesn’t seem to understand this is a problem (again, she will eventually face a consequence with this - but does not appear to understand why, which is the issue)

continuously appears to understand that her boyfriend, who has baggage surrounding undercover work, is struggling with her decisions but is trying to put on a brave face and doesn’t call him out for a lack of communication (to be clear, this part is very much also on tim - in moments even more so than lucy - but we’ll get to that later)

picks fights with her boyfriend for doing his job/treating her like his colleague when she has directly asked him to do so (i will not be engaging on the discourse surrounding tim's behavior in 6x01 other than to say that lucy asked him to behave like a TO and he did)

pushes her boyfriend again on his stance on undercover work when he’s openly trying to resolve his issues with it in order to keep their relationship stable (6x01/6x02 pre lie detector test is wild)

makes some deeply dangerous and mostly unnecessary calls that put her in extreme danger in order to make herself stand out because she doesn’t feel she’s getting enough recognition at work (lucy getting that dinged up radio as a trophy was sweet but we veer away from the fact that lucy quite literally chose to do something she didn't need to for kudos and could've died because of it - instead, we see her praised and applauded for her efforts without any ounce of "but you didn't have to do all that")

ignores the fact that she knows going into her detective’s exam that one of the proctors is not in favor of her, and then doesn’t anticipate the fact that it will impact her score/opportunities moving forward (again - this is a time where she does face a consequence, but does not anticipate it whatsoever, which i think is part of the problem)

and that’s just the big stuff. lucy consistently doesn’t face consequences for her actions - the detective’s exam thing is probably one of the few times i feel like i’ve seen her actually find herself in a pickle due to something she’s finagled. i love the fact that lucy can be crafty and creative, it’s one of the things i enjoy the most about her character…but a lot of the writing in the last season or so has felt less to me like she’s being crafty or creative, and more like she’s just skirting any legitimate consequences for her actions/ignoring any faults she’s shown as she’s moved through this phase of her career. even when she does have to face her decisions head-on, lucy often winds up trying to justify her behavior rather than admitting she was just...deeply over-achieving, or trying to do something to better her situation. she rarely sees a consequence coming, which is confusing when her character is clearly someone who can analyze situations for others.

with that being said, let’s get to this part: tim and lucy had problems before their breakup, and neither of them wanted to talk about them. think about the back half of season 5 - we see tim struggling with lucy’s uc work, lucy struggling to talk to tim about it or get him to own up to his feelings.

early on in season 6 we see them confront this a little, but it comes to no resolution whatsoever - and while it’s tim’s problem with lucy’s uc work, lucy chooses to act like that’s the only problem in their relationship. in 6x02, tim’s discomfort with uc work is treated like it’s their biggest issue when we as viewers know that there have been multiple times lucy’s just straight up lied to/withheld information from tim, either because she doesn’t think he needs to know or doesn’t want him to be in the know. lucy’s long-preached having great communication skills/knowing that open honest communication (5x18) is the key to her relationship with tim…but she doesn’t actually practice it.

lucy, unfortunately, is a bad communicator who thinks she’s a lot better at sharing her own feelings than she is. lucy is good at facilitating communication for others - it's a major skill of hers - but she's far less in touch with her own self, and we've seen that many times through the course of the show.

seeing her refuse to acknowledge her faults to tim, who she’s supposed to be sharing herself with fully, is a struggle throughout the beginning of season 6 - and so the tension was brewing for chenford when tim’s whole past-life-army-drama came into play.

now, here’s the thing: tim also has some serious baggage that he brings into this relationship (and just being real, in your 30s/beyond who is not bringing baggage into a relationship? i would be offended if they didn’t) and he has his own level of fault. the direct cause of their breakup in 6x06 is a tim thing. he’s not communicative, he’s a people pleaser (this is what i meant when i said we’d get into that later - tim’s people pleasing tendencies, esp in interpersonal relationships, are huge, to the point that he needed to be hooked up to a lie detector to even really grasp that he had issues with lucy going uc. that man gaslights himself into thinking things sometimes, and he’s always going to try to be amenable to the people he loves because he doesn’t want to lose them - which is a big flaw and a big reason why he broke up with lucy, but i digress), and he’s the kind of bitch that self-sabotages. things got difficult and he fucked up and he took himself out of the equation because leaving is easier than getting left - which, honestly, is probably a new feeling for tim.

but. this is about lucy, and the fault she has in the breakdown of their relationship. to be clear: they share fault. they are very much both at fault for the breakdown of their relationship (again - the direct break up was tim’s call, but we’re talking about what led to that), and i don’t think either of them grasps it just yet.

lucy has become used to getting her way more often than not (not all the time, obv, but enough) and if she doesn’t get her way directly, she can usually find a path into what she wants without much consequence. she doesn’t speak directly about her feelings or find herself probing for the feelings of others in tough situations where she’s directly involved. it's a strange dichotomy for lucy, who comes from such a psychology heavy background - and i often think it's one of the most interesting parts of her character, but the way she's been written in the last season and a half has really brought to light how misused it feels as a trait when she doesn’t see it.

so, tl;dr: lucy has flaws in her communication style and often finds herself lucky enough not to face the consequences of her actions, so when they do crop up at times, she's gutted by them. her chronic over-achieving has become her fatal flaw, as she's often trying to overdo things to make herself look good, rather than taking a step back to actually consider situations. while we can see these things on screen, they’re not addressed by the show which can be frustrating.

these qualities of lucy’s wrapped up in a bow make for her own set of issues that lent directly to the slew of issues that simmered into a boil of a breakup for chenford. while i don't think lucy was the whole problem by any means, i'm also not going to put that fully on tim. i want lucy to be able to grow and change and receive recognition for her work in a meaningful way, but without actually focusing on her flaws and acknowledging them, i don't really see how the rookie can do that in a way that serves the character.

ok don't hate me bye

[dotedlover]

I need you to yap about your oc……….

YES YES YES I LOVE HER SM,,, she's my main oc,,,

The Caregiver | Cecille Maduro

"I miss my babies. All I wanted was to be a mom."

Dear Detectives, warmly welcome the Caregiver to the manor and she will make a special spot her you in her heart! Time spent with her is always comforting and she will enjoy the time spent with you.

Character Profile:

Name: Cecille Maduro

Career: The Caregiver

Item: Blanket

Role: Rescue/Assist

Faction: Survivor

Hunter Identity: Weeping Angel (not yet developed im NOT locked in)

Difficulty: 1.5/3

Birthday: February 29th

Gender: Female

Age: 25

Height: 5'7

Ethnicity: Native American/Spanish/Mexican

Voice Claim: Kara (From "Detroit: Become Human")

Symbol: 🫂

Kamoji: (∴◓᷄‸◓᷅∴)

MBTI: ENFJ-A

Alignment: Neutral Good

Likes: Quality Time, Baking, Toys

Dislikes: Fire, Loud Noises, Fireworks

Character EP (The songs they've been releasing for characters): Almost ANYTHING made by Øneheart. absolute melancholic music.

Abilities:

Sacrifical Comfort: The Caregiver carries a blanket with 3 uses per match. She comforts a selected survivor, allowing the survivor to decode 5% quicker and the fear radius grows by 20%. When dealt damage while wearing the blanket, the damage will transfer over to the Caregiver, leaving the attacked survivor unharmed and making the blanket dissapear. If the offer of comfort is rejected, The caregiver decodes 10% slower for 20 seconds. She is able to see the survivor with the blanket at all times until it is no longer in use. 

Urgency: Due to the Caregivers nature, she worries greatly for her teammates. Once a survivor is hit, they will be highlighted to her for 10 seconds. When a survivor becomes chaired, movement speed increases by 20% and time to be rescued is decreased by 15% percent. Once rescuing a teammate, she will immediately pass on a blanket if avalible. If the rescued survivor gets damaged within the following 5 seconds, both the rescued survivor and the Caregiver will recieve 0.25 damage.

Sensitive: The Caregiver has an incredibly low tolerance for paid. When dealt any sort of damage, healing time increases by 5 percent and can be stacked up to 4 times (20% total). Additionally, due to having sensitive ears, the loud sounds of the cipher machine gives her a headache. Decoding speed is reduced by 10%. If a callibration is failed, she decodes 15% slower for the next 15 seconds and the setback is 2% more than a normal survivor. Bleeds out quicker by 15%.

Empathetic Soother: Having taken care of others for the majority of her life, she is soft and gentle with her hands. Heals 10% quicker. Knowing when others are in pain, she is able to detect injured survivors from 20 meters away.

Lore:

(now for the juicy part 😈)

Character Introduction:

Born as a twin in a low income family with absent parents in the West Coast of America, Cecille and Caden had to fend for themselves. Cecille took upon a more domesticated home life as her twin scavenged for food when they had no money. Cecille took up a position to aid wounded soldiers to have some sort of revenue, and here is where she met a man named Silas Barnett, the two soon fell quickly in love. Dreaming of having children of her own, the couple realized that Cecille was infertile. Falling into a depression, Silas decided to move them both to a new life in Britain. When Caden was urged by her sister to join them, he declined, not wanting to leave their home and a strong dislike of Silas.

From there, Cecille and Silas opened up an Orphanage/Daycare center where Cecille slowly began to recover from the news of unable to have children. This quickly became her entire life, she loved taking care of children and finally felt fulfilled when Silas proposed to her. However this dream didn't last long. Soon, Silas realized that this hadn't been the life he wanted and urged Cecille to close the center. She obviously struck the idea down, and their relationship became extremely rocky. Silas felt as if she began to nitpick on habits around the children such as no smoking, drinking, or any behavior that would be a negative stressor for the children. On the other hand, Cecille was worried about Silas completely calling off their marriage because they constantly argued about the life they were living.

On New Years Eve, the two had a major argument when discussing New Year's resolutions. Cecille decided to send everyone to bed early (mainly because these children being extremely young), and slept in a separate room than Silas this night. Silas at the end of his patience, decided that he was going to start his new life without Cecille and leave this behind. In a fit of rage, he pours gasoline sets the entire building on fire. Everything was set off rapidly to the point where Cecille barely had time to react, thick smoke already flooding the rooms. Cecille grabbed the crying infants that she slept next to and ran outside, though most of the damage was already done. Many people quickly came to Cecille's aid with the children she held in her hands, and she impulsively ran back in to attempt to save more small children from the crumbling building. People ran after her as she made her way inside because everything was already lost. Her entire body covered in burn scars, she cried as she looked at her life burning down in flames as fireworks went off to celebrate the New Year.

Everyone but Cecille dies in this fire, even the babies she initially saved. Their young and developing lungs couldn't handle the smoke inhalation and passed shortly after. Waiting for the police report, Cecille quickly has her wounds treated and she is released to a small home that she and Silas bought in the past.

As soon as the police report gets back to Cecille, she is told that they have all the bodies accounted for except for Silas and the fire had been deemed intentional. This is solidified because neighbors outside waiting to celebrate the New Year seen Silas leave the building shortly before the fire roared. They are unable to find Silas and with this information, Cecille has a mental breakdown. Looking at her engagement ring in disgust, she yanks it off her finger and begins to have a manic episode. She destroys everything in the house, shoving everything off of countertops, tipping over tables and breaking chairs, smashing glass and windows, shredding photos of she and Silas all while screaming and crying. Ripped bedsheets that the two confided in together and stained them with whatever she could find.

Manor Invitation:

Torn by the events and everything she's lost, Cecille receives a mysterious invitation that proposes an offer that she cannot pass up: Participate in a "game" for ensuring the capture of Silas.

Character Lore Summary:

Growing up with many hardships, she worked to change her fate and soon made a wonderful life for herself. Unfortunately, said life came crashing down in flames. Grief-stricken and in unbearable sorrow, the losses of the ones she called her own left her in heartache. She has to hold him accountable and can no longer bear to call him her "lover".

Cannon Oletus Manor:

I haven't created or stabilized enough OC's to create a survivor cannon match for her. However, she DOES have a hunter identity.

In the match where Cecille is the hunter, Weeping Angel, two survivors that participate in the match happen to be Caden and Silas. Both are TRAUMATIZED to see what she has turned in to. She runs into the both of them arguing (rightfully so, Caden was devastated to hear about what happened to the orphanage, and it turns out Silas had been keeping all the letters he wrote to her, which is why he never received a response since Cecille believed that Caden hated her after she left). Cecille is shocked to see her twin, but immediately turns her attention to Silas where she,,, murders him. She does NOT care about capturing anyone else and focuses directly on torturing her ex-fiancee.

Fanon Oletus Manor:

Fannon Manor Events (which I focus more on because tee be ache, its much more fun) differ. A little but of background: I used to ship Cecille with Eli until I felt guilty because Eli literally has Gertrude so I just decided to traumatize Cecille even more by making her "the other woman" (LANA DEL REY REFERENCE????) (im evil 😈) Im not going to get to it here but ill do some angst fics with them in the future.

Eli and Cecile start off pretty solid, they're both caring and generally work out together well. Lowkey a power couple until Cecille finds unsent letters to someone from Eli that she is NOT happy about. She feels stupid because the signs were always there, for she had comforted him on nights where he broke down but never told her why, though never pushed it for his own privacy. Cecille feels used, betrayed, all of the above. Though she takes it like a champ and while she would rather NOT interact with Eli, she won't be an asshole if she has to be around him.

Then Ganji arrives at the manor and they kiss and they're in love and no one or anything can ever separate them and,,,, AOUGH I just love cecille x ganji so much im going to THROW UP

ill lock in with them soon,,, trust,,,

CECILLE FUN FACTS YAYAYAY:

(just little worms about her that eat my brain)

SO SO SO SO SO kind and giving. She's just a comfortable character to be around and won't react negatively to some intimate actions. Share a drink with her using the same straw, literally undress butt booty naked and she wouldn't question anything (though the latter might come from her usually seeing people naked due to taking care of them.) ask her to take you a bath, for a kiss, to have her sleep in the same bed if you've had rough matches. All platonic and she's just so sweet. hold hands with her as you travel with her around the manor or during a match. ask for a massage or for a well cooked meal. her love language to others is DEFINITELY acts of service, but everything she's willing to do might as well be all 5 of the love languages. (please make ur oc x cecille art im all here for it)

On the other hand, she's also honest. She doesn't sugarcoat anything and WILL point out if you've done something wrong. Scolds people for treating others unfairly for no reason. (stuck up characters like Edgar and Freddy are usually on the receiving end of her scolding for this reason) She doesn't treat them disrespectfully, but will just be blunt of what they've clearly done wrong.

Positive traits: Empathetic, loving, hardworking, patient, encouraging

Neutral Traits: Unassuming, firm, cautious, analytical, frugal

Negative Traits: Melancholic, overbearing, worrywart, wary, sensitive

She CANNOT stand arrogant and rude adults,,, she literally LOOSES her mind and think of how disappointed their parents are because,, she's just appalled.

She's lowkey a little silly,,, Cecille LOVES having quality time with other survivors that are enjoyable to be around. She won't mind baking for them, or making an abundance of food to get fat while they are together. (She sometimes throws secret "parties" in her room that she invites anyone who won't tell) (Emily has caught her on multiple occasions)

Tries to unwind at the manor. She never had the chance to experience the lack of responsibilities because she raised herself and her adopted children afterwards. Does try to experience some things she wish she'd done when younger.

She dosent smoke, but she enjoys a nice alcoholic beverage once in a while.

isn't one of those annoying mother characters that infantilizes others, she UNDERSTANDS that people are adults. wont say stuff like that "omg dont curse" or continuously does things that puts people in those situations that make you wonder why she's treating them as if they're 12.

Though, she WILL baby and spoil people who outright ASK for it. who is she to deny when people come to her for it? however, she sees that not everyone wants her to be affectionate and if she is rejected she won't offer again until it is asked for. (she might be a little butthurt but its okay, she'll get over it without holding a grudge)

literally body blocks for EVERYONE.

bleeds out a LOT!!! with the time to bleed out decreased, going up against Percy or Joseph is her worst nightmare.

Sometimes, some hunters might just be dicks and bleed her out for fun

When meeting someone new she's usually formal, calling them by their last name unless specified otherwise

enjoys some sort of physical initiation when meeting up with someone (hug, pat, handshake) but still understands if thats not someone's thing

She loves bonding with the hunters so much, loves Leo, Bane, and the grumpy old man Burke to death

KEVIN!!! SHE LOVES KEVIN SO MUCH,,, they're besties and id lowkey ship them together too #mexicansinlove

this specifically has always been brewing in the back of my mind, but I feel like Kevin still carries much guilt with Angelina and he somewhat connects the two together which draws and pushes him away from Cecille in a romantic sense,,

cuts her hair when it gets too long to let go.

LOVES eating. LOVES cooking to eat. professional big back right here (her model is OLD OLD, ~2 years. id love to visit it again to make her chubbier)

she dosent have much stamina, but lord is she STRONG!!! can pick up almost every survivors in the manor

probably teases ganji when they're doing smthn sporty together, (I dont think ganji can lift her up, but she can FOR SURE carry that man) they're racing and she's huffing and puffing but she tells him in a shit ass teasing voice, "just dont let me catch you, gupta." cecille being bold makes ganji WEAK, he dosent know if he should let her catch him or run faster

holds ur hand when youre venting to her!!!! one of those people who you just know who actually cares about what youre saying

some of her habits are:

paints her nails just to scrape the paint off

rhythmic blinking

just bumps people with her hips randomly or when playing around

her hands are for some reason always cold as fuck???? so she always puts them under or between her thighs to warm them up

ALWAYS!!! and I mean ALWAYS!!!! has butterscotch candy on her. her ABSOLUTE FAVORITE THING

like, she's munching on that shit mid kite

She enjoys baking/cooking and cleaning

Trivia:

Cecille was actually originally made to be a self insert until I was really unhappy with the idea and she became a oc

Was originally meant to be a therapist until Ada was released! Her abilities were extremely similar to postman but worse since the characters would have to find each other mid match to receive buffs

she dosent mind that she's a little overweight, actually really loves her body! the only reason why she's always covered up is because of the burn scars on her body that she's embarrassed of

her birth certificate reads "cecil" and not "cecille". the nurse made a mistake on the spelling (reference for when I made her my dumbass thought that cecil was pronounced cecille. smh my illiterate ass)

despite hating loud noises, she can tolerate children. maybe she's grown deaf to it over the years

going back to the therapist and then ada being released, net ease has always been my opp when it came to ideas with her??? her once skin was meant to be her in a wedding gown and the skin was going to be called "promised day" and then the Mary skin came out. Then her deduction star would have been "Dorthy" from "The Wizard of Oz" then Memory received that skin as well. Lastly, Ada's "Everlasting Night" Skin is THE EXACT same concept I had for a skin for Cecille but it would have been called "Bleeding Blossoms" and would have been white instead of black. cant believe u net ease

Cecille's favorite flowers are babys breath, Lilly of the valley, and forget me nots

Playlist:

Harpy Hare - Yaelorke

Die in a Fire - The Living Tombstone

Evelyn Evelyn - Evelyn Evelyn

I Bet on Loosing Dogs - Mitski

The Other Woman - Lana Del Rey

Nothings New - Rio Romero

Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want - The Smiths

It's Been So Long - The Living Tombstone

The Moon Will Sing - The Crane Wives

Little Soldiers - The Crane Wives

Army Dreamers - Kate Bush

(there's probably more for her playlist but im so tired rn)

cecille if you were real you would have loved Lana del Rey and mitski and would kin Emily from corpse bride and loved Anya from mouth washing....

NETEASE!! ADD HER TO THE GAME RIGHT NOW!!!!

tytyty new oomfie for asking about her,,, I love yapping about her she makes me mentally ill

they,,,

[rambrandt-the-painter]

i hate reading and im checking mariam webster to figure out how to use punctuation marks but im still writing weirdly artful furry porn.

never give up on your dreams!!!!

[bijoumikhawal]

Tagged by @idonotbitemythumbatyou !

Rules: make a new post with the names of all the files in your wip folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. People send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, then post a little snippet or tell them something about it!

I dont have my ask open rn so i supoose just comment on this post/reblog

Gatak Nila (trans: may indigo find you, an Egyptian idiom/swear meaning something like "go to hell")

Raska and Kel

Oral lessons

Julian contraption

Julian gets ASIT bc garak is hanging onto life by a thread

Julian and Sisko co-domming

Garak tries to get Julian to Dom him post Empok Nor

Weeds and Panache

I tag @dreamerdrop @tokidokifish @wanderingwriter87 @oddeyelesbian and anyone else who wants in!

[samanthamulder]

THE X-FILES (1993-2018)

SEASON FIVE — What do you hope to find? I mean, in the end.