#nearly 3k words wtf

[sweet-little-dude]

hi hi taku my love!! <3 this is the k polycule ask plus i remembered that i’ve been writing a bajiharu fic and i also wanna talk about that hehe. actually i’ll talk abt that first bc the k polycule is all happy and the bajiharu fic.... not so much. and you deserve healing :)

btw btw beware this is long. really long. i copied this message into a wordcounter and it’s 1.5k without the paragraph you’re reading rn... whoopsies. i insaned a little on my ramble. do tell me if i should shorten it bc it’s too long, and take all the time you need to reply afhjfdgjjgdfh

so okay the bajiharu (baji x sanzu just in case that’s not clear for some reason) wip is currently sitting at 15k and. wtf man 15k ?? i wrote that ?? damn. anyways idk how many of my posts abt it you’ve read but it’s p much a giant character/relationship study of the two. basically bajiharu across the years and timelines. canon compliant too, which sadly means that baji is dead most of the time but oh well. it is VERY angsty (i mean baji is dead that’s where the angst is starting already... and i mean sanzu’s canon life) and uh. i keep describing sanzu dying in nearly every future timeline but i’m having a ton of fun :D also it’s gonna be angst with a happy ending when i’m finished and probably around 30k words. a 30k one-shot. i don’t think i can even chapter it.... welp. accidents happen. yk this was supposed to be a maximum of 5k of bajiharu in the og shin timeline (the one in which he lives and mikey has the accident and ends up dying and stuff) and the final timeline but. uhh. uhm. yeah honestly idk what i did but my brain wouldn’t let go of them so here we are lol

i would summarise the plot of the fic but there hardly is one ?? like it’s just random excerpts from their lives. i mean some of them are like 3k long too and def have plots in and of itself but there’s no greater plot to be summarised 😭

tho what i can say is that they actually are somewhat together in the og timeline and they are.. happily together. they are NOT happy in fact they are miserable but they love each other in a tender way yk. but but they WILL be happy in the final timeline. and happily together too!! i just need them to be happy pls okay thanks. in between baji is dead so not many feelings on his part (😭😭) but sanzu is a miserable wet cat. also i have the most tragic death planned for him in the bonten timeline bc i am a ‘‘weird on-off-ish romance-ish but they don't wanna admit it's that even though it very obviously is and there is so much emotional (and sexual) tension and my god how can they live like this’’ bonten rinzu truther. wowie. and wouldn’t it be really fun if rindou accidentally shot sanzu on a mission gone heavily wrong that ends in sanzu dying in his arms? yeah <3

also!! akashi siblings!! i very much plan on writing abt them too in some timelines. specifically i think i’ll have sanzu move in with senju in the manila timeline before mikey kills him off (i am so excited to write this you don’t know istg) and i’ll have him move back in with takeomi in that one timeline in which izana takes over and naoto & takemichi end up dying in the future bc i hc that senju was shot dead in the past and sanzu has nowhere else to go after mikey’s death (bc he’s actually dead in that future...) so yeah. akashi siblings <3

also in case you wonder what my current 15k cover so far (i’m forcing myself to write chronologically for once bc i really wanna finish this and i’ve got a lot of scenes i’m excited to write i can use to push through the others), it’s the og timeline, the timeline in which draken gets killed by kiyomasa, one of the two following timelines in which draken survives and ends up on death row (i decided to cut one of them bc imo they’re too similar to write abt again), and some past stuff happening before that. which. is not a lot. just now realising how unmuch that is actually wtf it feels like sm more- okay anyways i plan on writing about the bad toman timeline with takemichi as executive, the manila future, bonten future, the future timeline after that with izana, and naoto & takemichi dying, possibly some tenjiku timeskip stuff, and then ofc the final timeline. (i. i gotta say i hope those 30k aren’t lowballing it by like 10k bc if you consider that i’ve written for three timelines plus some inbetween bits and i’m planning for another five whole timelines with inbetween stuff-- ayayay bajiharu is gonna be the death of me)

uhm this is already mUCH longer than planned help buuuut some k polycule stuff bc i love them and they love each other and they are happy. okay so ik you read my posts abt them so i’ll just start with them in their mid/late thirties, finally settled down somewhere they feel safe and they actually like :3 cough cough switzerland mayhaps ? cough cough. yk it can’t be japan anyways... and switzerland is far away...... and i know it well....

okay. they adopt a cat. or maybe two. probably two actually. two cats for them bc they’d like some company other than themselves and kazutora loves cats anyways. i believe that koko is actually more of a dog person bc inupi, but he’s the type of guy to go ‘‘ofc YOU GUYS can get a cat. it’s gonna be YOUR cat. YOU will have to take care of it. i won’t (unless absolutely neccessary.)’’ and then a month or smth after they get a cat kazutora & kakucho are away for a weekend for.. work or smth idk and when they get home koko & the cat are sleeping on the couch while he’s hugging the cat close to his chest, and there’s cat toys all over the floor bc he spent hours playing with the cat. he will still refuse to admit how much he loves the cat but he continues to play and snuggle with it whenever his bfs (husbands? i feel like they’d wear matching wedding rings and call each other husbands even if they legally aren’t bc poly marriage is forbidden) aren’t there to see. also this is really random but kakucho is the small spoon, kokonoi the middle spoon, and kazutora the big spoon. or two of them just sleep hugging the third person.

kazutora would work at a pet shop again i think. maybe he’d even study medicine to become a vet assistant? tbh i’ve always seen him doing that more than chifuyu or baji (tho i love vet student baji too <3). struggling with giving the other two jobs bc after bonten i don’t think kakucho would still want to work with kids (tho i def see him doing some kind of charity work in his free time) and kokonoi... he can’t sponsor anyone like this nor could he do finances for anyone, and he would never ever work at a bank. he’d still like a high paying job/smth at least loosly related to money tho. maybe like some sort of secretary for someone in finances? idk. very open to ideas for these two bc well i am stuck lol.

i think they’d mostly just try to take it slow and enjoy their more peaceful lives now (well kazutora’s life was pretty peaceful before too.. but kokonoi & kakucho) without having to worry about illegal and dangerous and whatnot else stuff. they deserve it okay they all had to go through too many things 😭

also more random stuff about them. kokonoi is banned from the kitchen not because he’s a safety hazard or because he burned down the kitchen once or smth but because he keeps wanting to cook overly expensive gourmet foods, and while they do taste good they are way too expensive and take way too much. plus he HATES having other people in the kitchen with him (he straight up locks them out) and refuses to leave the kitchen while he’s cooking even if he has to wait two hours for something to slowly simmer on low heat so essentially he AND the kitchen are gone for half a day if he wants to make dinner. he doesn’t really mind the kitchen ban though so it works. i think kakucho enjoys cooking the most, but he and kazutora both cook a lot. and sometimes kokonoi forces himself to wake up extra early on weekends (like. 6am. and then he’s done at 7am. and the other two wake up at 9am when early, more like 10am to 11am bc weekend and kokonoi has to wait with his beautifully prepared breakfast for hours) to make pancakes for them all <3

uhh that’s everything in my brain rn i think. i hope. and this is already a fucking essay so whoopsies. anyways that was it, i very much hope you enjoyed my long ass rambles <3 fr fr i missed writing these rambles for you,, but aa i can do that again!! :D

hello elys my love <333 but allg!! i actually read this whole thing a few days after u sent it initially but ive been rlly drained these past like 3 weeks so i hadnt been able to get to it :(( apologies again my love

no cuz fr 15k crazy!!!!! good job!!! no cuz like that lil description of ur rinzu is actually so real.... (this is making me miss my tokyorev hyperfixation so bad ngl) but ur bajiharu fic sounds so good!! the idea and concept of it is so well thought of i applaud u so muchhh

NO CUZ FR WRITING ABT THINGS UR FAMILIAR WITH >> its like u know it so fuckin well which means u can go into rlly good amounts of detail like !!!!!!!!!! ok so first paragraph is so :333 koko being a softie for the cat is so sweettttt omg

i think the jobs u chose for them are good !! suits them all very well but yes agreed they most definitely deserve it <33

ofc its kokonoi doing that, but u cant blame him fr hez just being a good husband </3333

it was fun having this in my inbox again !!! i miss doing these too and i hope the late reply doesnt discourage u <333

[minty-pepps]

some thoughts on comics

this has less to do with comics as they are in their current state in the industry and more about the artistry possible with the form, maybe even artistry in other mediums as well. this is something i’ve thought about a lot, and it’s rather long and a bit rambly, a bit elitist and maybe even pretentious, but i’d gladly appreciate it if you read it!

(this contains some spoilers regarding The Killing Joke by Alan Moore, the film and novel Drive, respectively by Nicolas Winding Refn and James Sallis, Devilman by Go Nagai and Persona by Ingmar Bergman.)

while discussing art with an art examiner, i came across a particular topic which has been bothering me for a while. i mentioned my interest in comics and their influence upon my work, and one way or the other, i can’t particularly remember how we got to the point before we moved on, she said “yes, but you need to use your influences in the high arts”.

a typically familiar distinction was made once again: comics are low-art, cheap and mass-produced, with little artistic viability; all visual arts besides it have the potential for high art. 

had i been the person i was a few years ago, i may have agreed. i may have also extended the idea of “high visual art” being only possible within the classical mediums of visual art: painting, drawing, sculpting. 

but as i’ve gotten a little older, a little more open-minded, and a little more willing to see things from others’ perspectives, i’ve realized just how much artistic expression is possible in other visual arts as well. photography, film, comics, collages, printing, 3D art, etching, animation. all of these visual mediums possess inherent strengths that can create extraordinary images, can communicate things otherwise impossible in other ways.

but, as i wrote in the title, this is about comics; or, maybe, more specifically, the concept of comics and their potential. 

so, to give a definition of comics, let me use scott mccloud’s definition: “comics are juxtaposed pictorial and other images in a deliberate sequence, intended to convey information and/or produce an aesthetic response in the viewer.” 

this is ripped directly from mccloud’s book “understanding comics” (which is a great read and sort of inspired this write-up, i’d advise you to check it out) and while this may be the most accurate description of the form, it’s possible far more things may be done outside this definition, which could also fall under the idea of comics, but we will have to wait and see. 

it works well for now, however, and can possibly, with a backwards look at history, relabel some pieces of art as comics. an example of this, given in “understanding comics”, is the triptych, which typically is 3 paintings placed alongside each other to convey an overlying idea within the culmination of the works, with each work conveying their own specific idea. 

this gives one possible insight into the possibility of comics, and that is their ability to explore ideas in a “narrative” way via their images, whether it be actual narratives on display, or themes which link and provide context to each image. 

in other words, comics can explore singular ideas belonging to larger ideas, with each piece of art in the sequence informing the context and/or meaning behind the others, providing a framework for the entire comic from which meaning can be derived for each individual artwork.

 this ability of comics, for each piece in the whole’s meaning to be able to affect the overall whole meaning of the work, and vice-versa, falls under the idea of semiotics, and i believe it is this direct connection to semiotics which gives comics a large range of visual artistic expression beyond only narrative, beyond only language and beyond only imagery.

to give you an idea of why semiotics is such a powerful thing, let me illustrate for you; imagine a dog barking, wagging its tail, and running around in a field - see how it runs, jumps, and chases, in a friendly game, after a bird. now imagine a man, laughing, holding his belly, with a soft, loving smile on his face, a dog collar and leash in hand. finally, imagine a pickup truck parked in front of a house, its back canopy dirtied with mud and hair, with a man about to clean it up, a tired look on his face.

the logical association you could make here might be an obvious one: a man who loves his happy dog, after returning home from letting the dog run on a field, hates the process of cleaning his truck after bringing the dog back home in it. your mind has automatically made a logical framework to provide meaning to each idea shown.

but what if the man carried not a dog leash but now a shovel in the second idea? what if his face showed not happiness, but anger, hatred and disgust? the tired cleaning of the final idea can now carry a far darker association, yet it is entirely a created one within our minds. in fact, our entire perception of the relationship between the dog, the man, and the truck is created by ourselves. 

and it is with this perception of the whole, with our mind creating a logical connection between each individual element that comprises the whole, that gives comics its ability to convey artistic themes extraordinarily lucidly and at the same time also give the potential of intentional ambiguity and different interpretation (this intentional ambiguity i believe being the most important part of what people classify as “high art”). 

with this in mind, i believe comic artists have the ability to depict not only stories but thoughts and human ideas beyond the limitations of both narrative and visual arts in a vividly clear way which only our individual minds, informed as they are by our personal perceptions, can understand.

 but it does not happen, or if it does, it does not happen nearly enough. and this, i believe, is why comics are perceived as a “low art”, that comics are only a form that can only communicate simply and explicitly. 

so what are the limitations that, i feel, limit comic artists from being perceived as “high artists”, as artists with something serious to say in their respective form? 

i believe there are many reasons, reasons beyond the control of artists themselves which i can understand immensely (such as comics being a form of industry, which limits artistry a lot), but there are some beliefs and ideas which i believe are perpetuated within and around the form that limits comic artists from fully utilizing the medium in an artistic manner (this is also where i have to engage some elitist opinions of mine but nevertheless i believe they are necessary).

1) Comic art =/= Fine Art

(please note that this is dealing with artistic proficiency, not artistic intent or authenticity)

this is usually the first reason why comic artists are dismissed as “low art”. narrative propels comics, usually, and with the narrative behind comics providing the necessary framework for meaning to be connected between each frame in a comic, this usually has the unspoken implication that art in comics does not have to be technically proficient, or at least proficient to the standard of “amazing art” which most people expect from the visual arts.

i think, if you’re on tumblr, you can inherently understand why this is ignorant. if not, if you’ve ever given visual art a proper go, you can also understand why this is wrong. if an example must be provided, please look at this

this was made by Ashley Wood, an illustrator and comic artist, for his comic Automatic Kafka. i think this demonstrates how comic artists can display remarkable technical proficiency, and why i think the idea of comic artists not being able to be as technically proficient as a regular “fine artist” is a flawed belief.

However, even if a comic artist is technically proficient, what often drags them away from being considered a “serious” artist is

2) good art and good writing =/= good comic

(this is also handled in scott mccloud’s book, i highly recommend “understanding comics” once again”)

now i might sound elitist here, but listen, i think this is something that needs to be vitally understood by anyone who believes in comics as “high art”/a serious art form: any visual story when driven by plot, by actions, by thoughts, by things which can be tangibly translated into language and have a narrative formed from that, is inherently going to be inferior as an art when compared to literature; maybe not all forms of literature, since lots of “low art” fiction relies immensely on imagery to create scenes or events (which would be rendered a lot more elegantly and simply in a comic), but it’s simply due to the fact that words are far more useful for many abstract ideas which cannot be communicated simply by images alone. 

for example (and i’m going to use an example of a novel considered cheap, pulpy stuff to illustrate the problem here so that one gets the sense that it isn’t just “classic novels” that do narrative better than comics), if one takes a look at the film Drive by Nicolas Winding Refn, then compares it to the original novel by James Sallis (which, admittedly, the film adapted loosely), one will immediately notice the difference in tone between the two, but also what’s strikingly different is the way the Driver is characterised. 

In the film, the Driver is portrayed as a stoic, quiet and friendly guy, a sort of Man With No Name, with a dangerously efficient, criminally-inclined hidden life, whereas in the novel the Driver is shown to interally monologue a lot, and often in a cynical and acerbic way, while being a sort of anti-heroic moral judge, giving further insight into the character’s relation to the rest of the narrative, while still illustrating the abstracted Driver from the film. this could not be done as easily in the film, nor would it contribute to the film at all and quite frankly the novel’s Driver is a lot less of a character appropriate for the film in general but ignore this for now

this illustrates the problem of comics being believed (both by audiences and creators) to be only a narrative-driven or art-driven form. with this i must say there is nothing wrong with comics being narratively driven, it is just incredibly reductive to think of the possibilities comics may have if they’re only seen as narrative-driven and/or art-driven.

and, this is going to sound very elitist of me, a lot of the stories presented in comics are very schlocky, convoluted and contrived, and do not use the medium to its fullest extent to work on possible themes as best as they could. even highly acclaimed comics are praised primarily on their story lines and/or their art, perhaps some may throw in a nod to panelling, composition and so on, but there is rarely appreciation for how these comics use the form of comics, and often times, they don’t, really (i’ve had a couple of friends admit to skimming over the art in various acclaimed comics and manga they’ve read, such as Watchmen, The Sandman, Berserk and Goodnight Punpun, because “they’re secondary to the story”). 

to give an example of how i think comic form can be utilized to its fullest in narratives in a very good way for that “intentional ambiguity” i mentioned earlier, i’ll use the last page of The Killing Joke by Alan Moore

this is the culmination of the entire story, and it ends ambiguously for the reader (i suggest reading the comic for the full effect of this page, plus it’s a really good comic). 

is the joker being taken away by the police in the final panel? in the middle panel, is the joker being strangled, or is batman simply placing his hand on the joker’s shoulder? is batman laughing with or at the joker? is he being sympathetic, or is he trying to conceal his anger? does the laughter’s disappearance in the final 3 panels indicate resignation or death? 

we’ll never know, and thus we’re given this ambiguity which we can weigh against ourselves, reflect upon as human beings, and use as an insight into the overlying theme of the work. 

this may sound a little too serious for some, but I feel that dismisses the real issue here: it’s not about what approach an artist takes to approach their theme, nor what themes they have, it’s about how “seriously” they handle what they try to do - whether it illustrates the joy of familial love and care or the unseens horrors of war and their effect on everyday life, a certain level of gravitas should be employed by the artist to do so.

however, this comes to another point which i feel needs to be addressed, and it’s something i feel needs to be understood, as i feel it will help bridge the divide of comics and “high art”, or, more satisfactory, destroy the ridiculous barrier which prevents the form being appreciated or used for serious artistic expression, and that is

3) cliched and pulpy subject matter

(this is a bit of a rant and more rambling than my other thoughts, but i think this one is the main issue)

this ties in with a point i mentioned earlier, being that comics are seen as “narrative-driven” or “story-driven”. this often leads to extraordinarily convoluted plots having lots of “plot logic” and “lore” to justify many of the events that occur, as well as give a scenario for the emotional climaxes occur and for the themes to be explored. 

 now, let me say here, in addition to the earlier point about “serious handling of subject matter”, i personally, and i think some may agree with me, cannot stand having long and unnecessary trimmings surrounding a core theme, nor do i think justifications need to exist for anything and everything; if it works towards the emotion or ideas being explored, it works. 

for example, Devilman by Go Nagai is a pulpy action horror manga, that is its primary intent and the general expectation one gets going into it. i don’t really think i can get much exploration of any themes in the work beyond an “eh” touching on an anti-war theme in the second half with subsequent rereadings, but as a primarily action-focused manga with the intent being to entertain, Devilman is just perfect for that. there’s nothing wrong with that, but it’s first and foremost a pulpy story, done interestingly and satisfyingly; anything further than that is entirely a reading of my own, since everything else within the work contributes to its main explicit intention of the work. 

it wants to create a fictional reality where the events in the story can occur, so it does that, and it does that knowing the story as its end to the means of the plot’s logic and events, nothing more (i think this is where most people get irritated by seeing others do in-depth analyses of anime, manga and general other “trashy” stuff like 80s horror B-Movies but I digress).

i’ve got a big space opera dealing with the horrors of war. i do not see why i would need to divorce war from its inherently political-social implications on earth. 

i’ve got a fantasy chosen one journey, with elves, orcs and warlocks, with a side-theme of racism. yes, this may add interest to the fictional world created, and that may be interesting to consider when applied to real life, but it is honestly too distant, too alienated from the context of real life to adequately consider in real life, and i feel that that cheapens the value of any possible interpretation or intended meaning.

(do note that i am not derriding people who wish to such with fiction, with comics, or with any form of art, but i feel this is simply the issue that causes such a divide between “high art” and “low art”.)

let me use an example of what i feel handles its artistic expression well, without the trappings of logic or subject matter (thus moving into that “intentional ambiguity” which i feels gives serious art its timeless quality), though it is a film: Persona by Ingmar Bergman (something which i’ve had a couple thoughts on, which i plan to write on).

this film, from what i understand, deals with the personas which make up one’s self, and how our personas, even if we try to distance them from ourselves, are ourselves. how it does this is not shown in a structured, logical or plot-driven way, even if there is a plot which gives context and drive to the events being able to explore it. it instead uses the elements of film to explore this in ways which only film could: acting, imagery, sound, continual movement of time. when the lead characters enter the beach house in the film, reality become less rigid in structure, as it seems to merge with dreams (hallucinations even), and things don’t generally seem to work within reality’s logic, but instead operate for the needs of the emotion, the themes, the ideas that wish to be conveyed.

and that’s how the film “works”; not because of the material around what the artist wants demanding things be this way,or that, but allowing what is wished to be expressed instead steering the artist and their internal artistic logic. it is this whole idea which is expressed by the entire work that should be given priority, not the clutter, i feel, and the minor ideas surrounding this whole idea should give both insight into the meaning of the whole idea, as well as its surrounding informing our perception of its own individual meaning.

and, as i’ve said before, this is semiotics, and comics have the most direct connection to it in all artforms outside maybe film, and as our entire human consciousness is formed from individual experiences and elements from which we derive meaning in both their entirety and in their individual context, this is why i think comics have such immense potential for artistic expression: they are the easiest way for us to express, as closely as possible, the human mind.

thank you for reading!

[littleoddwriter]

So this is my first time requesting so it’s probably really hard to read.

Maybe Ns/fw of our boy the riddler <3? Ed as the dom if you write him that way.

The reader is male, a bit shy and is Eddie’s neighbor.

When the reader introduces himself Edward gets absolutely smitten.

Somehow IDK, they become friends and the reader confesses, albeit a stuttering mess and Ed finds it so cute yet is also really flustered (poor boys).

Just two socially awkward men figuring it out

You're Mine | Edward Nashton/The Riddler x Male!Reader | N/SFW (18+)

Hi there! You did very well, it wasn't hard to read at all. :') Gosh, thank you very much for this request, I really hope you like what I've done with it! He's more of a soft dom, who just becomes a bit possessive at the end, heh. Hope that's fine! <3

summary; See above.

notes; (Cis) Male!Reader; Meet-Cute; Friends to Lovers; First Kiss; First Time; Lots of Consent because consent is sexy; Blowjob; Handjob; Light Dom/Sub; Possessiveness; Both Reader and Eddie are Virgins; Socially Awkward Men; Love Confessions; Fluff and Smut. Minors DNI.

Moving out all on your own was scary; especially after having lived with different people for all your life up to this point. After you had first moved out from your childhood home, you shared multiple apartments with all kinds of roommates, but now you felt like it was time to finally be on your own. Thus, you searched for a small apartment you could afford, not particularly in the centre of crime in Gotham City - although that was a hard feat, considering all of Gotham was a pool of various criminals. But you had found an apartment to your liking and now you had finally moved into it. 

For the first couple of days, you were simply busy unloading all your stuff and setting things up in-between work and sleep. And while you did that, you debated whether or not you should go and introduce yourself to your neighbours. You've seen people do that before and they had even become friends with their neighbours, so maybe you could do that as well. But you were afraid, too. You had no idea who your neighbours could possibly be and maybe it was better that way. Right? 

The decision was eventually taken from you when you were running up and down the building to load the trash from moving into your car to get rid of it the next day. 

On your way out of your apartment with another box full of waste you've created - mostly cardboard and Styrofoam - you crashed into another person, who was probably just walking past your apartment to get to the one next door or the stairs. 

Instantly, you dropped the box on the floor, which spilled all its contents over it, and you also lost your balance, landing on your ass. 

Jolting up, you kneeled and started putting the things back in the box, while apologising frantically, "God, I'm so sorry! I hope I didn't hurt you or anything. I'm sorry. I didn’t see anything with the box in front of me—" 

You interrupted yourself when you saw a second pair of hands starting to pick up your trash to put it back in the box. Looking up at the stranger, you saw it was a handsome young man with clear-framed glasses, wearing a white button-up shirt underneath his opened blue jacket, and neatly combed dark blond hair. You were kind of floored by how beautiful he was to you. 

He even smiled at you. You only wanted to see him smile more often. 

"It's all right. Nothing really happened," he said gently, continuing to pick up the rest of your things. 

"Thank you for helping me," you told him sincerely. "Uh, I'm Y/N, by the way. I just moved in this week." 

"Ah, so you're my new next door neighbour, then!" the man exclaimed in recognition. "I'm Edward."

"Nice to meet you, Edward. I've been meaning to introduce myself all week long, actually. I'm kind of glad this happened now," you admitted softly, feeling a little embarrassed about it. 

"Me too," he smiled, "I mean, I'm glad too. Yeah,” he chuckled awkwardly. “Anyway! My door is always open if you need anything. I know moving out is scary. I'm kinda assuming this is your first apartment. Correct me if I'm wrong, please."

"No, you're right. I've lived with a bunch of different roommates before this and so it's quite scary to just be on my own all of sudden. So, thank you. I might have to take you up on that offer eventually,” you said with a small smile on your lips, getting up from the floor with the box back in your hands. “I should probably let you go now, though."

With a few goodbye’s the two of you parted.

______

A couple of months after this initial meeting, Edward could barely believe his luck. You and him have grown to be great friends. He’s certainly put in a lot of effort to make that happen; even though he was far too awkward and feeling slightly uncomfortable throughout. It was worth it. 

Ed has been absolutely smitten with you ever since he’s first met you. You were so sweet and shy and kind of awkward, which he was relieved to notice, and you seemed like a genuinely good person. A rarity in Gotham. He’s wanted to make you his ever since.

And so he’s put in all the work to make it happen. He rang your doorbell every other day at first, talking to you, checking up on you and offering his help to you. Every time you took him up on it. He’s almost spent more time in your apartment than his own during that first month or so. 

After that he let you hang a little on purpose, seeing as you had fully moved in by then and gotten used to everything. All he wanted to see with that was whether or not you would come knocking on his door after a couple of days of not talking to him at all. It would prove for him that you liked him back, and that you were worth pursuing further.

And, lo and behold, you did knock on his door after just two days, asking to come inside because he’s only ever been to your apartment, while you had never seen his. Smiling to himself, he let you inside. Things were going according to plan for him.

Now, you two sat beside each other in his bed, listening to music, while you were talking. 

It has become sort of a routine for the two of you on a Friday night to unwind from the week you’ve had respectively. 

“Uh, Eddie?” you suddenly voiced shakily, after a comfortable silence had settled between you two.

“Mh, yes?” he turned his head to look at you. 

You weren’t looking at him, as you gnawed on your bottom lip and wrung your fingers nervously.

Edward wondered what was going on with you. What kind of terrible secret were you going to tell him that made you act like this? You haven’t been this nervous around him in a while, actually. Both of you had grown pretty comfortable with each other. He loved that. 

“Uh- well- So, over the past couple of months,” you stuttered out, briefly looking at him, “we’ve become really good friends. And, uh, I really like you. And I don’t, um, I don’t- I don’t want to ruin things between us, but, uh-”

“Y/N, it’s okay,” Ed interrupted your absolute mess of whatever you were trying to tell him, “It’s just me. You can tell me anything. I’m sure it won’t ruin what we have.”

Inhaling deeply, you exhaled slowly before continuing, “I’m, uhhh, I’m in love with you, Eddie,” you quickly shot out, squeezing your eyes shut and curling in on yourself.

Feeling his face grow hot, Ed laid his hands on yours, causing you to slowly look at him. He couldn’t suppress the huge smile that fought itself on his lips. While he had wanted to be the first to confess his love to you, it made him feel all sorts of wonderful things that you had taken it upon yourself to do it before him.

Chuckling awkwardly, Edward tried to compose himself, but by God, he was so flustered by your sudden confession, he was speechless. 

Eventually, though, he was able to voice his own for you, albeit not any less clumsy than yours.

“Oh, Y/N, uh, I- God. My God,” he breathed, chuckling nervously, “Um, I’m so in love with you, too. I really am.” 

He could feel his neck, his ears and his entire face becoming hot with embarrassment. He was so flustered and in awe. 

Even though this was exactly what he’d been working to achieve, he could barely comprehend that it had actually worked. That you had actually fallen in love with him. He’s never been with anyone. He had tried, but everyone had always rejected him. But not you.

“May I, uh, may I kiss you?” was your response to his own confession.

Nodding frantically, Ed shifted around so he could cup your face in his clammy hands. You held onto his neck and shoulders.

Smiling at each other, you both moved in for your first kiss.

Once his lips pressed against yours, he heard angelic choirs sing in his mind, while electricity seemed to explode from his lips and run through his entire body.

When you parted, both of you only leaned back enough, so you could breathe and speak freely, while merely a few inches apart. 

Shyly, you licked your lips. He followed the movement with his eyes, feeling his cock stir slightly. 

“Wanna do it again?” he asked after a moment. His gaze flickered between your eyes and your lips.

You simply nodded and leaned in to capture Ed’s lips in a chaste kiss. But he didn’t want it to stay innocent. He wanted more. He moved his right hand to the back of your head and tilted his own slightly, so he could deepen the kiss, putting all the love and passion he felt for you into it. 

Edward heard you make a surprised, but excited, sound in the back of your throat in response. He wanted to elicit more of those noises from you. 

As he licked your lips, you opened your mouth for Eddie’s tongue to explore it, making you moan slightly. He could feel your face grow hot under his hand that held onto your cheek. 

As he kept making out with you, he shifted you both so he lay on top of you, between your spread legs. When your crotches touched and he could feel your hardening cock against his own, you both moaned in unison, breaking the kiss at last.

“Too fast?” Ed asked, looking you over to assess you.

“Perfect, actually,” you admitted shyly, “I, um, I’ve been thinking about this a lot.”

Smiling, he pecked your lips, “Me, too.” He paused and then asked, “How far do you want to go tonight?”

Hesitating, you opened and closed your mouth a couple of times. He thought you were entirely too endearing and kissed your cheeks.

“I don’t know,” you said softly, “Let’s figure that out as we go, okay?”

“Okay,” he agreed before capturing your lips in another passionate kiss.

This time, he broke it pretty soon, though, and kissed along your jaw and down your neck. Experimentally, he sucked on your skin there. As you let out a moan, he felt assured enough to keep going. He wanted to bruise you, so everyone knew that you were his now. 

When he thought that there would be a nice purple bruise, he let up, admiring your reddened, spit-slick skin. 

“God, you’re so beautiful,” he breathed, exhaling slowly and letting it turn into a groan.

He was so far gone for you.

In response, you hid your face in your hands and shook your head, “Thanks.”

Chuckling, he gently took your hands into his and removed them from your face. 

“Believe me when I say that you’re the most gorgeous man I’ve ever seen,” Eddie told you sincerely.

Looking dumb-founded, you nodded, “Okay,” you swallowed thickly and continued, “I think that’s you, though. The- the most gorgeous man, that is.”

Edward really couldn’t believe his luck with you. You were absolutely perfect to him in every possible way.

Gently running his hands down your torso, Ed took the hem of your shirt into his palms, silently asking to take it off. You nodded. He pulled it up and you sat up slightly so he could pull it over your arms and head. 

Uncaring, he balled it up and threw it over his shoulder. Both of you smiled at each other, enjoying yourselves.

Then, he took his own shirt off and quickly let it join yours wherever it may have landed.

Leaning back down, Edward supported himself on his forearms, as he made his way down your naked torso with his lips and tongue, following a trail from your collarbone to your nipples, which he swirled his tongue over until they stiffened and you thrust your hips up in desperate need. He kissed down your stomach, nuzzling your happy trail, and eventually reached your pants’ waistband. 

“May I?” Eddie asked, pointing at your crotch. He could see the outline of your hard cock and it made his mouth water. God, he wanted you so badly.

“Uh, sure!” you smiled nervously at him, making Ed pause in concern.

“We don’t have to go any further, Y/N. Just be honest with me, please. Okay?” he said, stroking over your thighs soothingly.

“No, no, uh, I want this. Please, Eddie. I’m just nervous is all. I really want this, though.” 

He believed you. He trusted you.

And so he undid your pants’ button and unzipped your fly, pulling your pants off and letting them fall to the floor. Your underwear and socks soon followed, leaving you naked and vulnerable underneath him. This was the first time he felt powerful when he wasn’t being the Riddler. It was absolutely intoxicating.

“Can I touch you?” he asked after he took off his glasses and put them on the bedside table.

Nodding, you smiled bashfully, “Yeah, I’d like that.”

With a smile of his own, he wrapped his hand around your hard, dripping cock and just held it for a second, admiring its weight and its warmth. You made an appreciative sound in the back of your throat in response. 

“Tell me if you need me to stop,” Eddie said before he shuffled down, so he was face to crotch, and planted a short kiss on your tip, making you moan in surprise and pleasure.

“Okay, keep going,” you told him, as your hands found his hair, gripping it lightly.

While Ed has never actually done this before and he was feeling anxious of fucking it up, he trusted you to not judge him for that. From what he could tell, he was your first, too. 

With that thought, he held your cock around the base and licked the pre-come off the tip, taking the head into his mouth and lightly suckling on it. The taste was a little weird, but he would get used to it quickly, he knew. 

Hearing your moans spurred him on, and so he started to take more of your cock into his mouth, stopping when he could feel himself resist. He didn’t want to gag on it. 

Breathing shallowly through his nose, Ed stayed like this until he couldn’t take it anymore. 

“Is it okay like this?” he asked, feeling uncertain, but unwilling to stop or to outright tell you that. He could do this.

“More than okay, actually,” you said, breathing heavily.

Feeling assured, Edward took your cock back into his mouth, less this time, and wrapped his hand around what he couldn’t take otherwise. Then he bobbed his head slowly, trying out how it felt to move with your dick in his mouth. Once he got the hang of it, he went a little faster and sucked on it whenever he reached your cock head. With his own spit slicking the way a little, he also started moving his hand along with his head. 

He internally felt relieved that he seemed to be doing a decent job so quickly, as he heard you moan and groan loudly above him and you seemingly involuntarily pulled at his hair, making him gasp in surprise. 

“Fuck, Eddie!” you exclaimed, “I think I’m gonna come soon!”

Letting up, Ed raised his head and kept stroking your spit-slick cock with his hand. 

Staring at you with half-lidded eyes, he firmly said, “Tell me that you’re mine.”

Moaning, you arched your back a little, thrusting your hips up to meet his quick strokes. 

“Tell me that you’re mine,” he repeated.

“I’m yours, oh, fuck, Eddie, I’m yours!” you groaned in pleasure, throwing your head back, “All yours!”

“Come for me,” he commanded, letting whatever possessed him to go down this route suddenly take charge. He needed this.

Moaning loudly, you arched your back, let go of his hair and buried your hands in the sheets, gripping it until your knuckles turned white, while you came all over your stomach and Edward’s hand.

“I love you, Eddie,” you sighed, once you’ve come down from your orgasm and he wiped down his hand and your stomach with wet wipes he kept in his bedside table’s drawer.

Smiling, Ed kissed your lips and murmured, “I love you too, precious.”

You closed your eyes with a blissful smile on your lips. He knew you were beat and that you would probably drift away within seconds, so he didn’t even attempt to remind you of his own erection, which was still straining against the confines of his pants. He could wait until later.

Lying down beside you, Eddie pulled up the blanket over your naked body, so you wouldn’t get cold, and wrapped his arms around you.

“All mine now,” he whispered, smiling to himself.

[mystic-writings]

REMEMBER THE NIGHTS | bright lights, big city

SUMMARY: Newt surprises Y/n with a trip to New York, where she gets to see her friends again. During the day, though, both of them are questioned about their supposed relationship by Y/n's friends.

WORD COUNT: 3,030

WARNINGS: cursing

NOTE: ironically, this chapter's plot is the original plot of the series before i spiraled even further into madness- also 3k words??? wtf????

PREVIOUS | MASTERLIST | NEXT

THE FURTHER INTO THE MONTH you got, the colder the air grew. There were only a few days left of October, and you were already considering wearing your winter coats to school. Every tree you saw was bare, leaves scattering the ground and crunching under your feet with every step you took.

You would’ve been thankful it was Saturday if it weren’t for the fact that both Newt and Thomas had told you to be up early. Last night, when you went to Mickey’s and the playground, the glances between your brother and friend weren’t missed by you - or anyone else, for that matter.

The pair refused to elaborate on their sketchy demeanors until the end of the night, when you asked Newt, who simply told you to wake up a little early tomorrow morning for a special surprise. It was a little unnerving, so when you went to Thomas, hoping for some sort of clarification, the fact that he gave the same response as his friend made you feel even more on edge.

You still did as told, though, the curiosity of their so-called ‘surprise’ taking more of a hold on you than the unnerving feeling of their secrecy. So, even though you didn’t want to, you were up at 8am - as opposed to the 10am time you woke up on Saturdays - to take a shower and get dressed.

When you finished your coffee and muffin, your phone pinged with a text from none other than Newt. He was simply telling you that he would be there soon, and that he hoped you were ready for your surprise. Again, the curiosity battled the anxiety as you waited, scrolling through your Instagram feed on the couch.

Maggie and your dad had come downstairs while you waited, the two of them sharing cheeky smiles as they ate their breakfasts. It was nice to see your dad happy. Of course, he was almost always smiling when he was with you, but the smile he wore when he was with Maggie was different.

When knuckles rapped against the wood of your front door, you nearly shot up from your seat. Newt waited at the front door, hands stuffed in his usual Sherpa lined collar jacket, a playful smile on his face.

“Morning,” he smiled.

“Good morning.” You greeted. “Where are we going today, then?”

His smile widened. “Somewhere fun. You’re gonna need to pack a bag, though.”

Once more, the curiosity piqued. “A bag?”

“Yeah. Just a small one, though. Wallet, phone charger. Stuff like that. We’re not gonna be staying overnight or anything.”

You nodded, pulling the door open wider to allow the boy inside. He stepped in, greeting your parents before following you up to your room. He sat on the bed as you grabbed a small backpack from your closet before stuffing it with the essentials. Your wallet, charger, a hair tie, chapstick, and a few other knick knacks.

After saying your goodbyes to everyone, you stepped in the car, unsure of how long the journey would take, or where your destination even was. Once the journey was underway, Newt let you play your music through the speakers, the two of you jamming out to songs both of you knew.

Though, that didn’t last very long, when you started trading stories about Thomas. The blond laughed his way through the time that Thomas broke his arm one winter when he and Minho were racing and he had slipped on a patch of ice-covered snow, and you recalled the time that he spent three month’s worth of his allowance on a giant Pikachu plush - which still sits in the corner of his room, even two years later.

“Have I ever told you guys about this one guy I went to school with?”

“I don’t think so, no.”

You had to push down a giggle. “Ooh, this is gonna be fun. His name was Mitch; he was a grade ahead of me at my school and I shit you not, almost every girl I talked to had a crush on him. If you didn’t have him in your class, you’d swear up and down that he was a student teacher or something.” You rambled. “I talked to him a few times in my photography class, but that’s not the point. The point is that he looks almost exactly like Thomas. All he needs is to shave closer to the skin and style his hair differently and it’s like they’re the same person.”

“No way,” Newt shook his head, but you saw the glimmer in his eyes.

“Yes way.” You confirmed. “In fact, I’m sure that if he’d transferred a year before he actually did, or if I hadn’t met Thomas when I did, I’d probably have had a crush on him, too.”

Newt breathed something between a scoff and a laugh, a bemused smile on his face. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

“I can show you, if you want. I have his Instagram.” Then you remembered that Newt should probably focus on the road. “Actually, just so we don’t get into a multi-car pileup because of the shocking similarity, I’ll show you when we get to… wherever we’re going.”

The mindless chatter resumed once more, occasionally broken when you turned up the volume to belt out the lyrics of a song or two. Cars passed you by on the highway, and you were so caught up in the bliss and free feeling of going on a road trip with Newt that you barely paid attention to your surroundings.

That is, at least, until you realized that Newt was struggling to find a place to park near a familiar entrance to Central Park. Your heart stuttered as you smiled, turning to Newt. “You took me back home?”

“Not quite,” Newt smirked, turning the steering wheel to reverse into a parking spot. When the engine was off and you stepped out, Newt began to lead the way as if it was him who had spent his whole life in the city and not you.

You walked past the metal gates once again, and you were reminded of the times you’d walk this path with your friends, fresh from the froyo shop or school, not wanting to go home just yet. “Newt, where are we going?”

“Just wait, you’ll see.”

And that’s when you saw them. Sitting on the bench a little ways away were your friends. Seeing them nearly took the breath from your lungs, and you didn’t stop yourself from shouting out to them. “Grace! Val!”

They shot up, smiles taking over their features as you ran toward them. They pulled you into a group hug, laughter spewing from your mouths as you pulled back. “I’m so happy to see you guys.”

Grace chuckled, squeezing your arm. “So are we.”

“How is this even happening? I mean-”

Valerie smirked. “You can thank your Godsend of a boyfriend for this. He’s been talking to us, Thomas, and your dad for weeks to arrange a time when we were all free to meet up for the afternoon.”

You barely had the time to realize that she was talking about Newt when Grace cut in with a groan. “I wish Elliot did stuff like that for me.”

“Grace, he literally took you to Coney Island for your anniversary last week and you went on almost every thrill ride. Those things are expensive.” Val reminded the brunette, who nodded thoughtfully. “And besides, at least you have someone.”

Your smile widened further, missing interactions with your friends like this. As they continued to bicker back and forth, like they normally did, you realized that this was all because of Newt. Glancing over your shoulder, he was waiting where you last left him, hands in his jean pockets and a smile on his face.

Quickly, you left your friends to bicker before running back to the blond, your body colliding with his as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him into a hug. He stumbled, barely catching himself as he pulled his hands from his pockets before winding his arms around your torso.

“Thank you so much, Newt.” You said, tucking your face into his neck for only a moment before pulling away, arms still around his neck.

Newt’s eyes scanned your joyful face before he responded. “You told me you missed them a few weeks ago, so I thought I’d take you to see them. Even if it’s just for the day.”

It was true. Your friends was one of the many things you talked about in the few hours you spent under the willow tree that night, and you were somewhat surprised that Newt had even remembered.

“I don’t care if I only got to see them for an hour, dummy.” You laughed. “I just care that you went through the trouble to get me here to see them.”

Newt shrugged casually as a laugh spilled from your lips. You pulled him back into the hug, trying to savor the way his hands felt as his fingers splayed across your back.

A whistle broke through the air, causing the two of you to jump and pull away completely. “Oi, lovebirds! Let’s get a move on, I’m hungry!”

Your cheeks burned as you and Newt caught up with your friends, beginning the trek to the froyo shop to eat the best dessert you think you’ve ever had before heading off to the mall.

You truly did miss Anne’s Froyo Factory. If you had it your way, you would marry the store in a heartbeat.

The group spent the better part of an hour sitting in a booth by the window, similar to the way your group in Woodstock sat. You and Newt on one side, Val and Grace on the other. The conversation flowed easily, mostly questions from the girls about how things were going at your new town.

They gasped when you told them about the shopping cart race and showed them the now-healing scabs and bruises that still littered your forearm, but were glad that you had no issues when it came to finding people and fitting in. That was, according to them, the thing they worried about most when it came to the move.

From there, you all took Newt’s car to the mall, where he parked in the underground parking instead of going through the torturous experience of attempting to find a parking spot outdoors.

Despite how packed it was, you would never not have fun when you went to the mall. You went into every store that caught someone’s interest, and you paid close attention to Newt, since he’s never been in this mall before. You had to make sure you didn’t lose him in the crowds of people.

Unfortunately, access to a bank account and being in a mall were the two things that ended up being your greatest downfall. You spent entirely too much money on a few new outfits, along with a lightsaber keychain for Thomas’ truck keys and a Lord of the Rings figurine for Chuck.

At some point, while you were between stores, Newt spotted a photo booth tucked just out of the way, and insisted that you go inside. Though you acted reluctant, the smile on your face told Newt that you were just as eager as he was. With your bags tucked at your feet, you shoved a $5 bill into the slot and closed the curtain, unsure of what to do with yourself.

Newt, who was tucked against the side, seemed to know what to do, though. Just as the countdown hit three, Newt turned to face you, as you did him, as he blurted out, “Gally watches Glee, but he refuses to admit it.”

You erupted in laughter and Newt followed, in time to hear the shutter click. This time, in the pause between photos, you figured out what to do. Newt faced the camera, a wide, cheeky smile on his face as you ruffled his hair, eyes still on his features, your smile softer than his. Then came the third photo, for which you put on the brightest smiles you could muster, so wide that neither of your eyes were open as you pressed your cheeks together. Though you didn’t know what to do for the final photo, it seemed as though Newt had that one covered, too.

You opened your mouth to speak as the countdown neared one, but before you could say anything, Newt’s hand cupped your face as he pressed a kiss to your cheek in time for the shutter to go off.

Stepping out of the booth with your bags in hand, you couldn’t muster the control to stop the burning on your cheeks. Two film strips were deposited from the machine, one for each of you. You tucked yours in your bag, Newt folding his in half and putting it in his wallet before finding your friends waiting by a GameStop so you could continue on.

By the time you made it halfway around the mall, where the food court was, almost two hours passed, and you all decided that the froyo from earlier just wasn’t cutting it anymore. So, you all went to your own places to order food before struggling to find a table to eat at.

Newt bought himself some Chinese food, Valerie brought back a take-out tray from the Greek restaurant across the food court, and Grace carried a tray of New York Fries with her. You had, unsurprisingly, bought a burger and milkshake from the Burger Palace, which earned a chuckle from Newt.

As everyone dug in, you frowned slightly as you sipped on your shake and took the first bite of your food.

“What? You don’t like it?” Valerie asked. “I thought you loved Burger Palace?”

You swallowed the food before you spoke. “It’s no Mickey’s, that’s for sure.”

Newt laughed, chopsticks full of lo mein halfway to his mouth. “Nothing’ll ever beat Mickey’s, Y/n. His recipes are homemade and secret.”

The girls, though they knew what you were talking about since you explained what the group did once a week, shared a look before returning to their food. The meal passed mostly in silence, until you excused yourself to go use the bathroom, and your friends moved in.

As soon as you were out of earshot, Valerie asked, “So, how long have you two been dating?”

“What?” Newt nearly choked on his drink.

“You guys can’t have been dating for very long. She’s only been gone for like… two months.” Grace stepped in.

“Oh,” Newt realized. “Yeah, um, we’re not- we’re not dating.”

Her eyes widened. “Really? I could’ve sworn-”

“No, no,” he blushed, “we’re just good friends, that’s all.”

“Well, you should ask her out.”

“Val!” Grace balked.

The girl shrugged. “What? I’m just saying. They obviously like each other, and if they managed to convince us that they were dating, then there’s seriously something there,”

Grace only shrugged, considering the girl. Newt observed the conversation, hoping the red that painted his cheeks wasn’t as obvious as he believed. Their conversation was cut short, however, when you came back, resuming your meal.

When you were all finished and all your garbage was thrown away, you decided that exploring the other half of the mall wasn’t worth the aching feet and worn muscles. After all, it had been two hours since you first entered the shopping center, and it was nearing 3 o’clock. So, you headed back to the car, this time with a trunk full of bags from various stores, to go grab something at a café before saying your goodbyes.

When you arrived back at the park entrance where the day started, you felt the tears welling up in your eyes. You and the girls stepped out, Newt opting to stay in the car while you said your farewells.

“I hope I get to see you guys again soon,” you said, fighting tears.

Grace laughed, wiping the bottom of her eye to keep the tears from falling. “Don’t worry, Y/n. You can’t get rid of us that easy.”

“Exactly. We’re like boomerangs; we always find a way back.” Valerie smiled, though you could see the sadness swimming in her green eyes.

Without a word, you pulled the girls into another group hug, savoring the moment as much as you could. When you pulled away, though, you couldn’t help but hug them separately.

“Take care of that boyfriend of yours.” Grace commented. “He knows how to treat you right.”

You rolled your eyes, a playful smile toying on your face as you tried to calm the burning in your cheeks. “He’s not my boyfriend, Grace.”

“He might as well be, seeing as he planned a whole day with us and drove you two hours just to come see us.” Valerie told you.

With a laugh, you hit both girls jokingly on the arm. You departed after another round of hugs and well wishes, getting back into the warm car and driving off.

The drive back was a lot different from the drive into the city. It was calmer, most of the silence being filled with the low volume of the radio as you and Newt finished off your drinks from the café. At some point, however, you felt it necessary to bring up the conversation you had with your friends before you left.

“Oh, you got that conversation, too?” Newt asked.

“‘Too?’ What do you mean, ‘too?’”

“When you went to the restroom during lunch, they practically ambushed me.” Newt chuckled. “Apparently, we make a very convincing couple.”

You couldn’t help but laugh along with him.

The night ended at your doorstep, Newt only popping in to say hi to everyone and assure that nothing went wrong with the ‘master plan’ that apparently everyone but you had been informed of.

You thanked the British boy once again, assuring him that it was one of the best days you’ve had since moving to the small town. From there, after saying your goodbyes, you watched Newt’s car disappear down the street before stepping inside.

Today had been a really good day.

TAGLIST: @sunny-reys @ghostofscarley @badbatch-simp24 @xhenix @virginia-peters (open!)

[just-some-random-blogger]

Death By Bagel

NCT Culinary Student!Mark Lee x Fashion Design Student!Reader Summary: Mark makes a cake cause he's realized he can't lose you to some f-boy. Word Count: 3k+ Warnings: Fluff, childhood au, college au, slowish burn, slight cursing, reallllly fluffy, some broksi-dude action, typos sksksksks, etc.

R E Q U E S T my friend: mark lee, slow burn, friends to lovers

A/N: I wrote a fic that already had like 1k+ word then I LOST IT (i think i deleted it) thus this. It took me 10 years to write this msmsmkskskks. PLEASE TUMBLR IS MESSING WITH ME AND MIXED UP THE ORDER OF SOME OF THE DIALOGUE

“As a doctor, I don’t think you should be doing that,” Mark says, not even bothering to look at his patient seated rudely on the floor. Oop, he’s lying down now.

Mark huffs and looks up from the clay block he was molding on his tray, “YOU’RE SO UNPROFESSIONAL!”

Mark’s mother nearly spits out her coffee upon hearing the words of his five-year-old son. Her husband snorts, “He got that from you.”

The woman throws a look at the man and was supposed to give a snarky retort, up until the sound of the doorbell ringing. She grins from ear-to-ear and dashes to get the door.

When she comes back to the living room, she’s accompanies by another woman and a tiny version of her.

“Markie! Say hello to your Auntie!” Mark’s mom calls.

Mark from the carpeted floor looks up and blinks, examining the stranger-woman and its human-ling. Mark turns to his father who was sat on the couch and receives a nod of approval almost. Mark purses his lips and waves at the woman.

The woman waves back and then crouches down to the little girl, “Baby, say hello to Mark.”

Unwilling, she shakes her head.

“Aw come on, baby. Don’t be shy. Mark over there is a really sweet boy. I knew him when he was in his mommy’s tummy, just like Mark’s mom knew you when you were in mine. You’re the same age so you’ll get along just fine.”

With the unnecessary explanation that gave no justification to the scene whatsoever out of the way, the girl was fooled into peeping up, “Hi, Mark.”

“Hello,” Mark says, not particularly interested, as his patient was still in the midst of dying in his office. He turned to his stuffed toy called Mr. Lion and attempted to stand him up once more.

At this point, the girl makes her way to Mark.

“We’ll be back in two hours, honey. Keep an eye on the children,” Mrs. Lee tells his husband who had been occupied with TV the entire time.

“Yeah. I got this,” he smiles to his wife then goes back to watching.

The bumble bee clad figure sat down to Mark in blue and watched him play.

Mark ignored her for a few seconds, needing to assert all efforts on standing that dumb toy up. Once successful, Mark turns to her, “Do you play doctors?”

Mark was then met with the same lack on enthusiasm. She hums, “I like playing baker doctor.”

All at once, Mark gasps, “ME TOO!”

It was unbeknownst to the children it was oddly specific and the chance of this happening was pretty slim.

And in a blink of an eye, excited giggles erupt in the room, as if they had been having so much fun before this scene. It was here and there the two would become best friends to the very end.

... so I guess it means the reckoning is upon us.

“MARK LEE I SWEAR TO THE FU--” “WHAT! WHAT!?” Mark laughs.

"YOU ATE MY BAGEL! AGAIN!" I growl in a loud whisper, throwing the wrapper at him and his flat head before he could think to dodge it while he annoyingly laughs.

"I asked if I could have it though!" he says, fully knowing his sins.

I glared at him and say lowly, "I thought you were referring to my notes, bread for brains."

Mark snorts loud enough for our teacher to wake up from his nap. Once the class notices, we all pretend to be doing something productive and Mark plays it off with a cough.

"Mr. Lee." Mr. Kim says sternly, clicking his tongue, blinking his eyes rapidly.

Mark finishes coughing and turns to our seated professor, "Yes sir."

"Don't go to school if you're sick and going to cause a racket with your coughing."

Mark nods firmly and Mr. Kim closes his eyes again, mumbling, "page 65 is due tomorrow."

The entire class grumbles. Mark beside me scoffs and makes a face, "Yeah, yeah, Doyoung."

I turn to him and elbow his side.

"Whatever," Mark shakes his head, "professor bunny-teeth won't hear me."

Once class ended, we both get our things and head out for lunch. We walk to our canteen, fussing over assignments, deciding we should do it together later in our mutually free period.

I groan and narow your eyes at him as we have an argument over how he hasn't finished the essay for English, "That's not the point."

"Yo Mark!" a voice calls from afar. Mark and I turn, looking for the voice, and I spot the dimpled senior, Jung Jaehyun, in a table with the rest of his squad.

I nudge Mark and point at the pale guy seated by the corner.

Mark throws him a smile and waves. I follow closely behind him as he walks over to the table. "We're going to sit with them?" I say in some sort of gasp.

"Yeah." Mark replies simply, not bothering to turn to me, "they're cool."

I knit my brows at that and nod, "Yeah I know. But I'm not cute today."

Mark stops in his tracks and throws me a confused look, "what?"

"I didn't put any make-up on today, also I'm pretty sure there's a visible stain somewhere on my jacket, I just don't remember where."

Mark scrunches his face up again, even more confused. "What? How do you... forget a stai-- that's not the point. Why do you wanna look cute today?" He scoffs and continues lowly, "hardly as if you ever look cute."

I let out an annoyed groan and punch Mark's shoulder. "Like when you panicked when Seulgi came over and asked for notes."

Mark openes his mouth, "That is so not the same! Jaehyun's a fuck bo-"

"Just shut up already," I snap and shove him forward so he'd continue walking. "Let's not keep him waiting," I add and mumble, "also I know. Dong Sicheng however is very cute."

Mark chuckles, "he's dated every girl on the dance team."

"Okay, maybe not that cute."

"Ya, Mark," Jaehyun grins and greets the said person with a high-five and chest bump. He turns to me and speaks my name with a smile. I smile back politely and wave.

I'm about to sit next to Sicheng, but Mark shoves me and so I end up sitting on the other side of the bench table with Jaehyun. I turn to Jaehyun with a small, non-awkward smile and shoot Mark a glare. He seems unbothered though.

"So, you up for a round later?" Jaehyun asks Mark.

Mark talks over me, "you know it, dude."

Jaehyun flashes his dimple smile all the stupid girls fall for. I'm only half falling for it cause I'm only half stupid. He raises his brows, "you bought the dough, right?"

This makes me knit my brows.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I really did this time," Mark mumbles quickly. "It's my turn anyway."

Jaehyun gives an off look, "that's literally what you said last time bro."

"Yo, no for real. It's in my bag, if you wanna check."

Jaehyun shakes his head when Mark begins to scramble for it, "no, Lee, it's good. We wouldn't want you friend to get dirty."

Is it just me or do you feel slimey all of a sudden?

Jaehyun then gives me a somewhat, somehow sincere smile, "so. I hear you're in fashion design."

I give a soft chuckle, "yeah. That's me."

"I could tell from a mile away. Mark looks horrible next to your getup."

I look down at my sweater and ripped jeans. Mark exclaims in protest, "shut the hell up, Jae."

I give a soft smile at Jaehyun, "don't know where that comes from but thanks I guess."

Jaehyun chuckles, "I'm kidding," he eyes Mark, "I saw your Fashion Design pin on your bag when you sat down."

"Oooohhhh, haha, okay, that makes sense."

"Ya, Jeff," Sicheng calls for Jaehyun, "it's almost time."

Jaehyun turns to his friend and nods. He turns back to me and Mark, "well, it's nice to meet you. Mark won't put a sock in it even if I beg. See you around, fashionista."

He stands and slaps Mark's back, "see ya later, broski."

"Yeah, bruh," Mark replies.

Once it's just Mark and I, I snap at him and blurt out in a whisper yell, "YOU'RE ON BROSKI LEVEL WITH JUNG JAEHYUN?!"

Mark gives me a weird face, "bruh, I think he calls the principal broski, for real."

I smack Mark, making him whine, "you know what I'm talking about, Mark! And what, are you doing drugs?!?"

He shakes his head in confusion, "Wait, what!? Who the hell told you that?"

"Uhhhhh you were talking about dough and showing up later. Sounds like you owe him money for drugs, Mark."

"??? In what universe did we even mention drugs?? Does this," he slaps his face, "look like a face of a drug addict to you?"

"A gullible idiot maybe."

Mark's jaw drops, "oh wow, okay. I'm done with this conversation." He proceeds to stand attempt to walk away. I scoff, "not on my watch bitch."

Like the true idiot that he is, Mark begins to legit run away from me, like a criminal who stole my cookies. It's embarrassing that he, a man much taller than I, could not even outrun me. I suppose I should be grateful, but this just fortifies my thoughts of him being an idiot even more.

But okay... I wasn't actually expecting this... like... Mark and Jaehyun... like... actually baking bread after school with dough Mark premade at home. Also, uh, Jaehyun looks super cute in an apron that I'm having a mental breakdown. And what's new, so does Mark.

"I can't believe you thought I was a drug dealer," Jaehyun says in a soft pout as he rolls out dough on the marble counter of his friggin large kitchen in his friggin large house. Like dang, I knew he was rich, but he's like Rich™ Rich. Rich with a golden diamond encrusted Rolex watch rich that's in a glass display rich-- wtf.

Mark wheezes in his telltale high pitched laugh as he opens a pack of unsweetened chocolate pellets, "she thought dough was some sort of metaphor or something."

"Cute," they say at the same time. Mark turns to Jaehyun in slight surprise and Jaehyun turns to me. I roll my eyes, though I feel my neck burn. I avert my attention to the scene I was sketching on my pad, Jaehyun and Mark baking croissants. I clear my throat, "I'm just making use of the single braincell between us, cause if he doesn't die falling down the stairs, he's gonna pull some idiotic stuff like baking with Jung Jaehyun."

Oddly, it's Mark that reacts to that with a, "hey!"

Jaehyun rubs his chin on his shoulder, "I also can't believe you think so little of me.'

I break a sweat but decide to answer honestly, "... ... ... You have a reputation."

"Of being a fuck boy?"

Mark loudly transfers the chocolates into a metal bowl, making the two of us snap at him. Mark makes a face, "oh gosh, sorry."

Jaehyun sighs, "well. I admit I get around, but that's only because I get dumped every time."

I raise a brow.

Jaehyun purses his lips, "nah, let's not make this weird. The croissants will be flat."

"Dude," Mark turns to him, "that's literally only because you messed up the recipe."

Jaehyun grits his teeth, "no. It's because Kun's a little teacher's pet and sabotaged me so he could get the best grade."

"No, but like Kun is really nice, he helped me with the fold techinique."

Jaehyun scoffs, "He stole me vanilla extract, Mark. Who does that?!"

"No, listen, he's cool, like, for real--"

"No, you listen, he's a little shit and--"

The two begin to bicker like a married couple, and I begin to draw inspiration form the scene to design some random sketches of wedding dresses.

I look back to the two and still can't get over the fact that I learned Jaehyun was a culinary arts major with my best friend, and that I was currently in the Jung's boojie home because I thought Mark was buying drugs from him. Not what I was expecting at all my day to go like, but I'm not mad this is how it went.

"No, no, no, no," Jaehyun says. He turns to me and points, "let's just get an outside opinion. Babe, what's your favorite color?"

"BABE?!" Mark barks.

I take a moment to reply. I blink slowly, "uhh... pink?"

Jaehyun bites his lower lip and claps his flour covered hands, "Right. Pink croissants it is."

Mark shoots him a glare and turns to me, back to Jaehyun, "she has a name."

Jaehyun nods, "yeah, and she wants pink croissants."

Mark makes a face and Jaehyun examines it, chuckling under his breath. "Wah, you two are something, huh."

No one really responds.

We began to always eat lunch with Jaehyun and his friends. It's funny cause I realized Jaehyun, although I still firmly believed he was out to get nasty with every other girl he sees, he was actually just like Mark. A total loser with a love for cooking.

"Hey," Mark says with a snippy tone.

I give him a look and suddenly receive a paper bag to my face. Mark sits on his chair next to me, as per usual. I smell the thing before I realize what it is. It's a freshly baked bagel. I perk up and smile, "Aw, you baked me a bagel?"

Mark raises his upper lip, "no. Jaehyun did."

I knit my brows, "what? Why?"

Mark narrows his brows, "do you, like, like him?"

I give him a look. I take a bite of the bagel, making Mark look at me in disbelief. I answer, "You do know I only hang with him cause you do, right?"

"Then why'd you eat the bagel then?"

"Uh, a number of reasons. 1) it's a bagel, 2) free food, 3) I'm starving, 4) it smells amazingggg."

Mark does a face, "fair. I've been meaning to ask how he does his seasoning for a while now too." He releases a breath, "and anyway, I'm pretty sure he made a bagel cause I told him you liked them. Never talking about you to him anymore though."

I look at him, "why do you talk about me so much to him anyway?"

"Uh because you're amazing," Mark says instinctively.

I feel my heart skip at that. I coo and place my hands on my chest, "wait that's really sweet."

Mark looks at me. His face begin to shift, "too bad it's a lie- haha."

I give him a look and rebut, "jerk."

"Loser."

As quickly as I found out about Jaehyun being Mark's friend, that's about as quickly as I found out he didn't like hanging out with him anymore. It's kind of a shame I never got to go back to his boojie house.

There was this one encounter I had with Jaehyun though... which was a little weird, not gonna lie.

He was waiting for me outside my Tailoring class, smiling and waving when he saw me. I Reluctantly reciprocated and walked over to him.

He releases a breath, "I've been waiting for about 20 minutes for you. I didn't know when your class would end."

I raise my brows, "you could have asked?"

"Well I would need your number for that, and that would have ruined the surprise," he pulled out a brown paper bag, reminiscing the same one Mark chucked at my face.

"I made you two this time," he smiles.

I take a moment to reply, "you don't have to make me bagels, Jaehyun."

He grabs my hand, "yeah, but I want something out of ya," he places the bagels in my hand. He proceeds to lead us off and we begin to walk down the hall.

Truth be told, it's a little scary that his ulterior motive is up in the air. Jaehyun places his hands in his pockets, "I like your dress, by the way."

I smile, "thanks. I made it."

He smiles and nods, "right. That makes sense as to why it suits you well."

I can't help but blush at that, and simultaneously feel conscious when I realize a bunch of girls in my course are looking at me and Jaehyun as we strut down the hall.

"So, what did you want, Jaehyun?"

"Well, I clearly wanted to ask you out."

"..."

"..."

Jaehyun smiles and give a soft laugh, "is it so ground breaking?"

"... Uh..."

He sniggers, "hey, you can say no. I mean I hope you don't but you can." Jaehyun leans in and raises his hands, "I won't like it, but a man should take rejection from a lady well."

I turn to him as he straightens up. I turn to the bagels he made me and bring it back to him. He laughs, "no, I made them for you really. It's not poisoned, in fact it's made with love."

I visibly react to that, which makes Jaehyun wheeze. I can't help but laugh back, "that was hella tacky."

"Worth a shot though," he says. "Good luck with Mark."

I look at him with silence and he chuckles, "ya, you can't fool me."

I'm about to retort but then Jaehyun gets called by one of the frats dudes I identify as Johnny Seo. Jaehyun does a curtsy and clicks his tongue, "see ya later babez."

"You know, I would have said yes if you didn't do stuff like that."

Jaehyun purses his lips, "no you wouldn't."

I shrug, "worth a shot though."

Jaehyun places a hand on his chest, dramatically calling, "Uh, rejection hurts, man."

Yeah, I never went to Jaehyun's boojie house ever again.

Silver lining though was Mark's dorm smelled equally as nice because of all the food he cooks, although it came with a whiff of axe body spray from his roommate, Lucas. It's cool though, he was almost never around for me to smell it in its whole intensity.

"Aite," Mark calls from his side of the dorm. I perk up from the two seater dining table they had and turn to Mark who was covering the cake he was making for his finals.

"Don't, like, peek, okay. I want you to see the cake all at once and give me your honest reaction to it. Please, like, all my lives kinda depend on it."

"How many lives do you have?"

"9, I'm pretty sure."

I stand from my seat, "not you faking your life as a cat, but get it I guess."

Mark raises a hand at me as I walk over, "can you not, I'm high-key panicking right now."

"Over what? You literally made a box of donuts for your midterms and it looked better than Misty Mreme! I'm sure your cake is hot."

"It was in the minifridge for a day. I mean it barely fit cause of all of Lucas' mountain dew."

I groan, "just show me it, Mark Lee!"

Mark whined and dashes over to me, grabbing my shoulders, "okay, but like, don't be mean about it. I swear, I might cry."

I give a sound and fake cough, "it's ugly."

Mark doesn't respond to that particular jab, "I'm serioussss. Please be kind, okay?"

I look at Mark's nervous face and give a soft pout, "Markie, please, not that I think it would be ugly, but I promise you don't have to be nervous about my reaction."

He isn't soothed by that, but he does release a sigh, "okay. So for context, Mr. Moon wanted the cake to be one or two tiers, but I went with one, cause there aint no way I'm going to the other side of the campus to freeze a two tiered cake. Then, the theme was something from your childhood, so, I, uh, thought this was fitting. The exam is 60 percent decoration, 40 percent taste by the way."

Mark gives me a hesitant look, but steps way for me to see it. I then see a heart shaped, medium sized cake in my favorite pastel pink color. By the top there's a little boy on the floor playing with a toy oven set and little girl in a bumble bee dress, holding a stethoscope. At the bottom of the cake, there were jelly letters spelling out, "I like you."

I cup my cheeks at the sight of it and feel my eyes start to well at the sentiment.

Wait... was this really happening?

Mark heaves in and out, "okay, so like when Jaehyun began to like hit on you, that sucked pretty hard because he's known for getting girls and I thought maybe he'd get you too and I got panicky. Anyway, I....... have liked you since we were kids... And... I know you probably don't feel the same way but I have to try, you know.... Yolo."

My feel my tears retract from what I hear. I rub my eyes. I turn to Mark and find his nervous face. "Did you just say yolo in your confession, Mark?"

He looks like he's about to throw up.

I can't help but chuckle and pout, "dude..."

I prolong the moment. Mark gets even more nervous as he repeats softly, "dude..."

"We could have dated in grade school all this time."

It takes a moment to register in his head.

Like, a really long moment.

I sigh, "Mark! I like you too, dummy."

He freezes and blinks. His face begins to burn. He breaks into a soft smile, "nice."

I break into a laugh.

"... Uh... So... Can I like... Kiss you?"

I snort and feel my own cheeks begin to burn, "I think you should refrigerate your cake first."

Mark snaps out of this trance, "oh shoot, you-" I give him a quick peck on the lips.

He is dumbfounded.

I feel butterflies go wild in my stomach.

"I'll wait over there for when you've fixed that."

Mark watches as I walk away, "yooo.... That's not fair though."

[worldsentwined]

(No)NaNovember

Since November is right around the corner (wtf where did this year go) the annual NaNoWriMo hype is starting up again. I love seeing all the energy and excitement for writing that it produces! But. I am in no way, shape, or form capable of writing 50k words next month without running myself into the ground. I’m not really in a place where I can commit to doing anything every single day for a month unless it’s already something I do every day to keep myself alive. Last year I attempted NaNo, wrote 30k words (at least 10k of which were unrelated to my main “project”) and then couldn’t write for months. So I’m not going to do that to myself again.

Instead, I’m going to try to make progress on some of the many, many works-in-progress that I’ve started and left unfinished over the past year or so. Maybe I’ll write a sentence or two. Maybe I’ll try to actually iron out some plot problems. Maybe I’ll do silly ask/prompt games to get me thinking outside of the box. Or maybe I’ll draw character art instead of actually writing because sometimes when I tell myself to write all I want to do is draw instead. 

Some of these stories might be familiar to folks who have been following me for a while - I’ve either posted excerpts or promised spinoffs/continuations. I figure if there is excitement out there for some of these stories, it might make it easier to work on them? So I’m going to lay out the ones I’m thinking about, partly to keep my brain organized and partly to see if there’s interest in reading a particular story. If something piques your curiosity, feel free to ask questions about it!

Dual Citizenship

On my first night in this apartment, I couldn’t sleep. I was exhausted, worn down from a stressful day after weeks--months? Years? Of anxiety. I should have fallen asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow, but I couldn’t escape my circling thoughts. I was going to live. I was going to live here, in an unfamiliar space with unfamiliar people. I told myself back then that it didn’t matter who I lived with, and it didn’t matter what I had to do as part of this new society the robots were creating. I had enough insulin to stay alive and a safe place to sleep. That was all I needed.

I can’t sleep tonight either, and this time my insulin stockpile is cold comfort.

~15k words (with nearly 5k of extras/deleted scenes/notes) I saw this writing prompt about a robot apocalypse in which a person with an insulin pump gets dual citizenship due to being a cyborg, and some of the replies made me so angry that I decided to write a story as a giant “fuck you”. But then I got really invested in it and now I just really want to tell this story about a cranky diabetic dealing with their weird roommates and also emotions. Delves into the inherent ableism of our capitalist society and some of my own repressed medical anxieties. Also there’s an nb/nb romance that keeps trying to take over the plot even though it is so not the point of the whole thing, oops. This is the story I’ve actively been working on for a few months so it is the one I’ll most likely keep working on if people don’t chime in about other stories.

Operation: Wingpeople

Second pressed a button--all of their monitors went dark--and tossed a set of keys to Greg. “You’re driving. We need to stop by my place first, though.”

Greg caught the keys. They were his keys; they had been in his pocket, last he checked. He sighed. “Sure. What are you thinking, bugs so we can keep an eye on the place? I wonder what their security system is like.” That was Second’s area of expertise, but they’d worked together long enough for Greg to pick up some basics.

“No, I already have my surveillance kit,” Second said, extracting themself from the bean bag and tying their hair up in a loose bun. “I need to get my ball and shoes.”

“Your...what?”

Second opened the door and waited for Greg to follow. “My ball? My shoes? We’re going bowling, Greg.”

~3k words When I wrote Operation: Boyfriend in a frenzy last spring, it went from being a silly idea that I was going to write out and post in a day and forget about (ha!) to being my most popular work on AO3 ever. I had a lot of fun writing Sasha and Charlie’s story, and apparently people also enjoyed reading it. I also became very fond of Sasha’s henchpeople, Greg and Second, and had this idea to write a spinoff about what they get up to while Sasha is busy being a lovesick disaster. Enter this story, in which Greg and Second go undercover in a bowling league (to sell one of Sasha’s more ridiculous lies) and discover a secret plot. No romance here so far, but I’m putting up as many neon signs saying “this character is asexual and probably some flavor of aromantic” as I possibly can. 

A Stitch In Time

Three things make a stitch in time, Mom always said. A piece of the past. A piece of the present. A hand to guide the needle. With my prize in hand, I start the stitch.

The world puckers. Time folds around me, and I close my eyes, feeling my way through the weave of it. I never know exactly how far back an object will take me until I get there--the farther I go, the worse the distortion usually gets. This house is old, though, far older than the jacket, so I’m expecting familiar surroundings when I arrive. 

So it’s a shock when the stone floor and cheerful yellow walls of my kitchen are replaced by some kind of--research facility, all chrome and glass and inexplicable translucent white surfaces. In the time it takes to recover from the stitch and get my bearings, three things happen.

First: an announcement over a loudspeaker. Welcome to the Bureau of Time Tailors. Your current chronology is 14:35, the ninth of May, 3021. 

Second: something wrenches the jacket from my hand, and cool metal clamps around my wrist.

Third: the person standing in front of me, all crisp blue uniform and neatly coiffed graying hair, smiles. “Ah. I see we’ve caught you at last, Ellis Corvi.”

~6k words (and it’s SO close to being finished but I was having trouble sticking the ending so it’s been left lying) Yet another one from a writing prompt, this one about a time traveler who travels through time by touching objects and going to when they were made...who unexpectedly ends up in the future. Enter Ellis Corvi, recent college graduate and casual “stitcher” - a person who can move through time - and their best friend Rigel Crow. Turns out that messing with time isn’t quite as consequence-free as Ellis thought, and the details of their own past are more of a zigzag stitch than a straight seam. No romance, but lots of friendship and family dynamics.

Meeting of the DKP Squad - Continuation

Some said the first dragon had cursed the kingdom with its last breath, dooming them to repeat its reign of terror. Others said it was a protective spell by a benevolent witch, ensuring that a hero would always rise when the kingdom needed one. A few select scholars argued that perhaps the dragons had some ulterior motive for appearing, such as migration patterns or territory expansion, and only stole the princesses by coincidence--but most people dismissed their ideas as flights of fancy.

Even as a little girl, Princess Magnolia had thought the “fanciful” scholars had a point. Curses and spells were tricky things, easier to imagine than to set in motion. But she could appreciate a finely-woven story. In many ways, a well-crafted tale could serve just as well as magic.

~4k words (including the already-posted section) I wrote the first part of this story and posted it on Tumblr a while back, and I promised I would continue it but uh. I got stuck because Plot. Basically a knight, a princess, and a dragon are best friends in private and enemies or lovers in public. This is a problem, because the knight (super gay, pining for a hot magic student) is supposed to marry the princess (also pining for someone hot, not interested in marrying the knight) and before the wedding he’s supposed to kill the dragon (who’s just, really into hot sauce). Anyway I know parts of how this goes but I haven’t figured out what the Plan is to stop the wedding (it doesn’t have to even work, but the characters have to think it will). So this one will probably stay on the backburner unless I get a brilliant idea for it, but I haven’t forgotten about it. The plan is to have both m/m romance and f/f romance in this one, depending on how things work out.

[what-a-messsss]

2x2 rewatch

Eeeeehehehehe, why the fuck am I laughing this hard when I realized it was the roadkill compost episode?  That is not in the least funny, it’s actually pretty gross, but I’m literally paused 3 seconds in chortling to myself so hard that I’m having to wipe away tears.  ...I think the stress is getting to me.  Anyway, back to fictional Wyoming!

It’s actually a pretty genius business model, to be honest.  Taking a sadly repeating resource and using it to enrich the soil?  Tough work, no doubt, physically and mentally, but a smart and very niche thing.  I hadn’t thought about the fact that cleaning up roadkill would have been part of Walt’s job as a deputy.  Lucian said in S6, in his fantastically circuitous way, that it had been 10 years since he and Walt had worked together (if I remember correctly).  Which... wait, is that right?  Had Walt really only been sheriff for 4 years when the show started?  Which is a single term, before Branch ran against him.  I think I’d had the impression that he’d been sheriff for longer than that.  Or is my math just super borked?  (A very real possibility.)  Who were Walt’s deputies before these three?  Branch has  probably been a deputy for a while, Vic was hired a few months before the show and it isn’t clear for Ferg but it’s implied at least a chunk longer.  So who were his deputies for the rest of those 4 years?  (Aaaaaand this is how I grow OCs.  Shit.)

She names the roadkill?  Eeeeeh...

Branch, you douchecanoe.  You are very clearly not welcome in her home anymore; the fact that she hasn’t moved the spare key isn’t a fucking invitation to break in and invade her privacy, oh my gods I hate you so much.  This is predatory behavior.  You need to either go through official channels with the department to do a wellness check or FUCK RIGHT OFF into the deepest reaches of hell.  Excellent plan, fucking off.

Henry,  I adore you beyond measure.  “Thanks-taking.”  Vic... Seriously?  “God, you people really hold a grudge.”  Somehow, I think they’re kind of entitled to, what with all of the wars, genocide, stolen land, racism, broken treaties, and the like.  Get bent.

Genuinely, Henry’s dry as anything sass is quite possibly the best thing about the whole show.  We didn’t get nearly enough of it during the later seasons.  And his little smiiiiile at having made Walt chuckle, oh my heart.

The “Hands up!”  O.o  “Hands down!” little comedy gag is totally sold by KS’s face, haaaa.  And Ferg’s bafflement, but collected response to those truckers thinking he was a rentboy was solid.

I kind of have to applaud that sex worker’s gumption to just try to take off in the truck.  Not the best thought out plan, to be sure, but gutsy.

Ok, Branch has just had a line establishing that they’re not in Absaroka, and then Vic and Ferg look annoyed/confused when Walt tells them to cut the sex workers and customers loose, but then Branch finishes with, “Absaroka County wishes you all a fine evening... at home.”  So are they in Absaroka, or not??

Kudos to Walt saying, “Which will allow you to get out of here.  If that’s what you want.”  Not falling completely into the savior complex bs is good, and acknowledging that she is an adult who can make her own decisions, even if they’re ones he would wish she wouldn’t is good.  ........If only he could extend that same courtesy to his own daughter.  

Branch, wtf.  It’s a felony to even have burglar’s tools.  Legit, it’s a felony punishable with up to 3 years in prison or up to $3k, or both.  Unlawful entry is 10 years and/or $10k, and I’m pretttttyyyyyy fucking sure you don’t have a warrant to be in Cady’s house.  FUCK OFF.  You giant douchecanoe.  (Min and I also have a headcanon that the random coloured empty frames are Branch’s fault, because they don’t really go with any of the rest of the decor, and we hate them.  So we decided that when he saw the Andy Warhol style print she had that he got those for her and she just never got around to taking them down after they broke up.)  And isn’t tampering with someone’s mail a federal offence?  You are the worst.

Aaaand then Walt calls the Collettes showing Ross Lanten’s wife video of him with prostitutes “interfering in his marriage.”  Okaaaay.  Because helping get a woman and kids out of what has several hallmarks of an abusive marriage is “interfering,” I guess.  Not the happiest about that word choice, I’m not gonna lie.

Aaaaaand then Whitish is super racist, and I hate her.  Henry handles it with grace, but fuck, I cannot imagine how wearying that must be.  And Branch makes obnoxious and offensive assumptions (playing to his strengths, natch), and Henry once again demonstrates how he is also the Actual Best.

Nobody has heard from Cady recently, but the tiny little hesitation Henry has before he confirms that he hasn’t heard from her either is so good.  LDP is so good.  Just from that, it reinforces how much that bothers him, and that he’s worried, but also that he really doesn’t want to talk to Branch about any of it.

“If you do, will you let me know?”  “I most certainly will not.”  Such a classy way to basically tell Branch to fuck off and get wrecked.  

A lady threatening Henry with a knife and I should not be focusing on how great he looks in a vest, but heeeeere we are.  (I do love that brown vest.)  And even after she is drunk and rude and racist and threatens him, Henry’s look when she says that she knew the dead man still has concern and compassion in it.  Waaaaaah.

Do I remember what Walt did to his hand?  Was that something from this episode that I’m not remembering right now, or are they actually having some intra-episode continuity and that bandage is him still recovering from the start of frostbite?  [Dang it, my Xbox controller just pooped out.  Now I have to go swap it out for the other one and stick this one in the charging dock.  But I’m so cozy in bed with my jar o’ tea and everythinggggg.  Boo.]  ...  [It has been long enough since I wrote that last bit that my Xbox has shut itself down twice in the interim.  Oops.  I’m super great at focusing.]

Fuck, that “I was some place I shouldn’ta been” hits hard.  This whole seen in rough.

Aaaahaha, why is the fact that Ferg is also standing there looking at Walt when he wakes up so much funnier than if it had just been Vic?  And his little grin.  And Ruby with a mug of his toothbrush and such for Walt!  Rubyyyyy!  (Holy shit, the fact that they have this little set up is alarmingly adorable, and I heckin’ adore Ruby.)  And then she sasses Branch, and I just want nice things for her.  

Walt’s “If you want,” to Ferg came off to me more like, ‘waste your time if you want to,’ (though that could well be my own issues projected” but I’m proud of Ferg for running with it.  And I do appreciate Walt calling the sex worker a lady.

Of course, he pulls Henry into his bs, getting him to solicit a sex worker.  Why does Henry put up with him?  I’m sorryyyy, but the pointing is so awkward and I cringe so hard, but what else is he going to do, I guess?  And how does he recognize her anyway?  Did Walt take a picture of her before letting her go, or something?  It doesn’t seem like he even got her name, to pull up a picture from a rap sheet, sooo...  Why am I even worrying about it?  And at least Walt doesn’t think that it’s not rape just if it’s a sex worker.

The flashback scene sure hits hard, too.  Damn.  I’m trying to remember the last time I saw anybody other than Vic actually pull on a glove in consideration of fingerprints.  I think there might have been one time or something, but nothing comes readily to mind.

For all that I rag on Walt for just collecting his assumptions and taking them to the bank, there is heavy irony with him now laying out the reasons he’s not arresting Whitish, because there is reasonable doubt in the form of the Collettes.  

Ooooooope, and then Branch brings up Cady.  I sure this can only go really well.  Aaaaaaaaand of course Walt has one of his Longmire Epiphanies and just walks off in the middle of the conversation, such as it was.

Does a college registrar’s really have your birth certificate on file?  I’m pretty sure I didn’t have to submit a copy to mine, but I also don’t really remember?  But that seems weird.

Ah, the bandage was about the frostbite.  I appreciate the continuity.  

Hmmmmmm, Cady leaving her phone at home when she drove to CO seems unlikely.  It seems unlikely as a generality for her generation, and on practical levels (directions to the precinct and such?), and just... That’s pretty hard to buy.  If I don’t want to talk to somebody, or even a bunch of people, I’d ignore calls or even block numbers, but her not taking her phone gives the impression that there is literally nobody that she would want to talk to, and that plays into this really weird bit of characterization void that the writers fell into of Cady just not knowing any single person other than her dad, Henry, Ruby, Branch, and Ferg, and I guess Vic.  As if she just doesn’t exist outside of her relation to one of them.  She doesn’t want to talk to any of the 6 of them, so there is not a single other person on the planet who she would want to be able to talk to/have them contact her?  There’s not a single other person on the planet that she knows who if they called and said, “I have an emergency, can you talk/help?” that she wouldn’t want to be available for?  Bullshit.  The entire rest of the series when she’s onscreen is showing how much she cares.  She’s a fucking Hufflepuff, and she’s not going to leave her damn phone at home while she drives 6 hours away into another damn state.  If you so desperately need to that she’s not even seeing his call, have her leave it in her car when she goes into the Denver station.  Like, unless she has a second phone that she did take, I’m not buying it.  Even as an attempt at “she’s so caught up in her mother’s murder now, oooo, Longmire tantrum and singular focus’ characterization.  Just, boo.

[what2finish]

Creator Post: Rudearrow

Rudearrow’s WTF Creator Post (Auction #1001, #1002)

Creator’s previous works: Here!

Link to GDrive Folder of WIP Summaries/HCs/Plot Bunnies Creator is Offering: Here! 

you can contact the creator before bidding at:

email: rudearrow@gmail.com

Likes:  fantasy au, sci-fi au, plotfic/casefic, found family, Redemption Arc With Hard Work, Demonstrating Contrition, and Learning to Love Yourself(tm), wingfic, lesser known pairings and characters, crossovers, whacky ideas taken seriously, whacky ideas taken whackily, bdsm

Do Not Wants: no non-con, torture, incest, or underage. no harder kinks, ie: scat, waterworks, gore, etc.

Preferred Charities of the creator: Any

Full Charities List

___

Auction #1

Type of fanwork: fanfiction

Fandom: Marvel, DC, Stranger Things, Game of Thrones, Supernatural, Mo Dao Zu Shi/The Untamed, (honestly, just email me if you like my writing... if I know your canon, I'm probably down)

Pairing(s): I'm a multi-shipper who loves underdog/rarepairs, existing WIPs are for Winterhawk, Winteriron, Winterironhawk, Robb/Theon, Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington/Dean Winchester. Platonic/grey-ace pairings welcome!

Character(s): there isn't a character from any of the canons listed that I won't write

Rating: General, Teen, Mature

Marvel WIPs:

Crimson & Clover: Urban Fantasy AU; 616 Clint & Bucky, endgame Winterhawk. Clint Barton has finally done the Right Thing(tm) and left his life of petty crime with Cirque du Nuit behind him. He’s got a GED, a bow, and coffee- and not much else. In the process of rebuilding his life, he runs into a not-so-tall, dark, and handsome stranger. Literally. He thinks a spilled latte and a bump on the head will be the end of his encounter, but with each successive run-in, he realizes that maybe luck just isn’t on his side and outrunning his past might not be in the cards after all. Current WC: 15k.

Half-splitting the Problem: Winteriron canon reversal! Feared dead after an attack on his convoy in Afghanistan nearly three months ago, the CEO of Barnes Industries has once again defied expectations. Having survived the attack and his subsequent captivity by the terrorist organization, The Ten Rings, James ‘Bucky’ Barnes has returned to American soil and turned his company upside down. Tony Stark, a young man from humble means with few options, has been working his internship with SI R&D for nearly a year now. He’s noticed activities that can only be described as ‘iffy’ at best, but with a boatload of student debt and a work history peppered with reprimands and missed deadlines he’s decided to keep his head down for the almighty dollar and hope for the best... Until he stumbles across Obadiah Stane’s personal project. Current WC: 1.5k

Seraphic (Hallowed Incorporeal Entities) Liaison Division, AKA: S.H.I.E.L.D.: Winterironhawk wingfic! Bucky Barnes has been assigned a new Seraph partner and he’s not happy about it. Tony Stark is that  Seraph and while he’s not thrilled either, it really is a lot of fun to push Barnes’s buttons. Clinton Francis Barton, unbeknownst to him, is their first assigned charge. And honestly? He could use all the help S.H.I.E.L.D. can spare. Current WC: 3k

Misadventures in Solitude: Clint Barton-centric, fwb Winterhawk, open to endgame romantic Winterhawk, alternative Clint pairing (except Nat. Sorry, for me they are always platonic soul mates), and/or poly. Just a day in the life of Clint Barton, coffee-riddled, exhausted corporate cog. He did all the “right” things- went to school, got a decent white-collar job, moved to the big city- so why is he so unhappy? And lost. Except, shit... he’s actually lost. Where the futz is he? Current WC: 1.5k

Part I:  The Space Between Us: 616 Winterhawk; Space! Kidnapped Clint! BDSM. This is technically part one to the fic I finished a few months ago on my linked Ao3, Show Me the Miles. Bucky has been chosen for the “away team”, as Stark likes to call it. While Bucky is bored almost to tears watching Stark and Rogers schmooze with extraterrestrial royalty, Clint is snatched while on a milk run mission back on Earth. Bucky, suffice it to say, doesn’t exactly take the news well. Current WC: 5.5k

Marvel HC:

Fairytale Winteriron AU: Bucky/Tony Bucky is a sprite with moth wings. Tony is a sprite with butterfly wings. Their peoples have centuries of animosity and sharp words for each other. Then ‘the fire(fly) nation attacked’ and [choose which one here] is injured, only to be saved by the other! Begrudging friendship and appreciation turn into more. Endgame is sprites in love. \o/ 

Completion WC Estimates:

Crimson & Clover, Estimated 40k+ upon completion. 

Half-splitting the Problem, Estimated 15-20k upon completion. 

Seraphic (Hallowed Incorporeal Entities) Liaison Division, AKA: S.H.I.E.L.D., Estimated 20k+ upon completion. 

Misadventures in Solitude, Estimated 10k+ upon completion.

Part I: The Space Between Us, Estimated 15-20k upon completion.

Fairytale Winteriron AU HC, Estimated 15-20k upon completion.

GOT WIP:

Manual for Spaceship Westeros: Robb/Theon; Space Colony Au! There is tension between the loose planetary alliance that calls itself Westeros. Robb Stark, as the only full-blood Stark son of age, is sent to negotiate a stronger alliance with Iron Born, a terrifying clan who has made a small water planet habitable through the genetic modification of its ancestors, sweat, and blood. Robb arrives to seek an audience with The Greyjoy and make his offer- the hand of his sister Sansa. But The Greyjoy deems this insufficient and Robb quickly finds himself on the offering plate. Current WC 2k.

Completion WC Estimate: 20-25k

Stranger Things & Supernatural: 

Billy Dean Was My Lover (working tongue in cheek title): main pairing Steve/Billy (possibly Steve/Billy/Dean?); Billy/Dean; crossover plot-ish fic! When his dad called and ordered Dean to pack up Sam then head for the Midwest, he didn’t ask questions. Apparently, strange things were happening in small town Indiana; which was usually a Winchester’s bread and butter. Yet even Dean and Sam aren’t quite prepared for the kind of strange Hawkins has, especially with John failing to meet them at the town’s motel. But there was something even more surprising than the super-powered teenage girl and a whole new world of monsters... 

Hearing the name of Dean’s tape-swap penpal out of some preppy, polo-wearing guy’s mouth. Current WC 1k.

WILDCARD, AKA: ANY HC/PROMPT FOR THE ABOVE PAIRINGS AND FANDOMS LISTED.

If you like my writing but aren’t into the WIPs here, I will write a fic that is a minimum of 10k for any character, ship, platonic pair, for any of the fandoms listed above. I’m also happy to write for material/canon I know but that isn’t listed above. If I know it well enough, I’ll write it for you! (Exception being RPS.) Just message me if you’re curious and I’ll confirm that I’m familiar with the source material. :)

Starting Bid: $10

Creator Notes:

Like my fellow mod, Mei, I am willing to work my winner's likes into my stories and am open to brainstorming sessions!

Feel free to email me to learn more about any of the WIPs stories and if you like, I will give you my Discord handle. I am willing to work with my winner's pairings as long as they don't fall into my DNWs. For Marvel the only two pairings (of the ones I am most familiar) that I just cannot see romantically/sexually are Clint/Natasha and Bucky/Steve.

Current Bid Spreadsheet: Here.

Please check what the current bid is at before bidding.

Bids might take a few minutes to load.

Bidding ends on November 28th 11:59:00pm CST. The highest bid before that deadline will win the auction.

Bidding Form: Here.

Please check the Bid Spreadsheet and bid higher than the previous bid.

You will not be notified if you have been outbid. Only the winner will be notified after bidding ends.

___

Auction #2

Type of fanwork: fanfiction

Fandom: Marvel, DC, Stranger Things, Game of Thrones, Supernatural, Mo Dao Zu Shi/The Untamed, (honestly, just email me if you like my writing... if I know your canon, I'm probably down)

Pairing(s): I'm a multi-shipper who loves underdog/rarepairs, existing WIPs are for Winterhawk, Winteriron, Winterironhawk, Robb/Theon, Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington/Dean Winchester. Platonic/grey-ace pairings welcome!

Character(s): there isn't a character from any of the canons listed that I won't write

Rating: General, Teen, Mature

WIPs/Prompt:

Literally the same as Auction #1!

Staring Bid: $10

Creator Notes:

Like my fellow mod, Mei, I am willing to work my winner's likes into my stories and am open to brainstorming sessions!

Feel free to email me to learn more about any of the WIPs stories and if you like, I will give you my Discord handle. I am willing to work with my winner's pairings as long as they don't fall into my DNWs. For Marvel the only two pairings (of the ones I am most familiar) that I just cannot see romantically/sexually are Clint/Natasha and Bucky/Steve.

**In the unlikely event that both winning bidders want the same fic and you don’t want any of the other WIPs listed, I will offer up a fic of equal or greater length for whatever HC you desire. Within, of course, the same DNW parameters listed above. This includes the Wild Card option!**

Current Bid Spreadsheet: Here.

Please check what the current bid is at before bidding.

Bids might take a few minutes to load.

Bidding ends on November 28th 11:59:00pm CST. The highest bid before that deadline will win the auction.

Bidding Form: Here.

Please check the Bid Spreadsheet and bid higher than the previous bid.

You will not be notified if you have been outbid. Only the winner will be notified after bidding ends.

[fleetofshippyships-archive]

Fanfic Author Meme

Tagged by @diligent-thunder and @rockmarina​ =)

Okay, so I’m me, and I talked way too much, so I’m putting this under a cut to save your dashes. You’re welcome 😘

Please do not reblog this post.

Author Name: 

Fleetofshippyships + Knowyourincantations + Legendaryroar

Fandoms You Write For: 

(in order of decreasing # of fics) Harry Potter, Voltron, Merlin, Yuri on Ice, Star Trek, Star Wars and then a few one-offs that aren’t really worth mentioning.

Where You Post: 

AO3 primarily, Tumblr, trying to post more on Pillowfort, I also post on a couple of sites for knowyourincantations

Most Popular One-Shot: 

Fleetofshippyships: Potter’s Insatiable Cock (Drarry, Explicit (duh XD), 20k (viewable only for logged-in AO3 users)).

Knowyourincantations: A Decent Start to Things (Pansmione, Teen, 7k)

Legendaryroar: Finding Time for Rest (Sheith (Voltron), Teen, 3k)

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: 

RestraintNone of my old multi-chapter fics are available to read at this time and I don’t really write multi-chapter fics anymore.

If oneshot/drabble collections or two-shots count, then:

Fleetofshippyships: Vanilla and Sweet Spices (Drarry, Explicit, 2 chapters, 20k)

and this really doesn’t count, but technically it has multiple ‘chapters’ soooooooooo

Legendaryroar: Kinktober 2018 (Multiple ships (Voltron), Explicit (duh), 31 ‘chapters’, 26k)

Favourite Story You Wrote: 

I don’t think I ever have a static favourite, I’ve just written too many things, I too quickly move on to the next (and frequently forget some of my own fics exist XD), but recently I re-read In Pursuit of Red Wine (Dreville, Teen, 29k) and really enjoyed that again, and I am really attached to it cos it was my first longish rarepair fic, kind of proving to myself that I can write longer rarepair stuff. 

I also recently re-read Unburdened (Merthur (BBC Merlin), Explicit, 2k) and really enjoyed that too, had a total disconnect from having written it since it’s been so long, so I was able to read it without self-judging, and oh boy that was nice. 

I’m also quite proud of Healing What’s Left (Parkgrass, Teen, 2k) for some reason, I dunno, maybe the dark political backdrop of the fic, or maybe just cos it’s the first time I’ve written Daphne as the main character and I’m happy with the result and now have some headcanons about her rather than her being an unknown blank character to me. 

I also binge read a lot of my Voltron stuff recently and had big feels over that so....I also specifically enjoyed re-reading The Perks of Skincare (Klance (Voltron), Explicit, 3k) again cos I dunno, I like how I wrote Lance XD and also the Sheith fic I linked earlier is a fav for sure. Shiro/Rest is the ultimate OTP.

It really depends how soon after I write something or when I go back to re-read it as to what my fav is at any given time (or people commenting on it and hyping me up for it again).

Story You Were Nervous to Post: 

Everything. But most recently I was terrified out of my mind before posting: 

Friday Night by the Fire (Harry/Neville, Teen, 583 words) because I have a lot of fears about screwing up trying to write ace characters and somehow not even making that a focal point of the drabble made it even more terrifying,  No More Waiting (TianShan (19 Days), Teen, 2k) because it was a new fandom to write in, Harry Potter and the Maudlin Merman series (Drarry, Teen+ Mature, 3k +6k) due to my feelings of inadequacy because it would be better as long fic but I struggle too much with writing these days to write long fics and can only manage short things. I’d rather write this as a long fic, but then I’d never finish it so connected oneshots are the best I can do right now, but I still feel it’s not good enough and have a meltdown whenever I post one. And speaking of which, I’ve been sitting on the next one for months and should probably just fucking post it already.

Actually, most recently: Minding One’s Limits (Cho/Ginny, G rated, 1.5k), because I gave Cho a disability modeled off my fibromyalgia and wrote a scenario similar to something I’d dealt with myself, it was incredibly uncomfortable to write in the first place, and then terrifying to post, even though it’s so short. But in the end I’m proud I finally wrote about it a bit? I dunno, might take me a while to work up the nerve again though XD (also was my first time writing that ship, so there was a lot of nervousness over that too)

Oh, and I was a super ball of anxiety posting  Kinktober 2018 (Multiple ships, Explicit, 31 ‘chapters’, 26k) because for almost all of those it was the first time I was writing those kinks (and some were kind of squicks for me but I wanted to see if I could write them anyway cos I’m dumb like that) and in a lot of cases those ships were completely new for me to write too, in addition to trying to write and post 1 a day, so...yeah. Also that was my first time writing tentacle and human/werewolf smut so...yeah. I was an absolute mess that month and not in a fun way. But I’m still really glad I did it, it was fun =D

In summary, I’m always an anxious mess posting anything, but most especially if it’s something I’ve not written before or is personal to me XD

How Do You Choose Your Titles: 

Most of the time I’m staring down the empty title field in AO3 cursing like a fucking sailor when I choose titles XD Sometimes it’s a line/theme/feeling from the fic. Sometimes it’s totally random and just comes to me. Sometimes I just grasp the first thing that I can no matter how stupid it sounds cos it’s been three days and I still don’t have a title and I’m over it and ready to post before I lose my nerve.

And tbh, it’s only getting harder to think of titles as my number of fics increases, and I’ve now started thinking of the perfect titles only to realise I already have a published fic by that title so....TITLES CAN DIE A FIERY DEATH

Sometimes, not so much anymore, it would turn out that I would give a wip doc a name just so I’d know what it was, sometimes as a joke with whoever was reading it and cheerleading while I wrote it, and then I would refer to it by that and think of it as that so much that when it came time to actually give the fic a title, it was too late and I could not think past that stupid file name, and that’s how Potter’s Insatiable Cock happened, and how I very nearly called a Merthur fic Arthur’s Wanking Tower (saved that one at the last moment thank god cos the tone of that fic is actually really serious and emotional and wtf was I even thinking with that file name and actually I linked to that fic above XD it ended up being called Unburdened). 

Potter’s Insatiable Cock slipped through cos it’s actually relevant to the fic content and I could live with it.

But needless to say, I don’t give my wip docs joke names anymore XD

Do You Outline: 

Only if I never want to actually write the idea...once I outline, it’s over. I can’t write to a detailed plan. It stifles me. I’ll always get stuck having to try and think ahead to the plan, and then I lose the flow and nothing works because I’m a pantser/intuitive/instinctive writer not a planner. Sometimes I jot down ideas but in like, the vaguest of ways, usually more focused on emotional development than actual scenes or events or anything because then I won’t be able to write it (and I rarely stick to those vague ideas anyway). 

I can really only write when I’m staring down a blank doc with no idea where it’s going and discover it as I go (which is why writing is so fun for me). I can only finish a fic if I don’t think too hard about what’s going to happen next and just let it happen as I write. 

This of course means that editing is a fucking bitch when I finish anything, beginnings often get totally re-written, but if I plan, it just doesn't happen at all, so I’ll take the extra editing if it means I manage to write something.

I do have a lot of detailed plotty fic idea outlines...and I mourn them cos I’m never going to write them now, but they’re so goooooooooood XD

Complete: 

Online (across all 3 accounts): 381 (incl. my hidden drarry fics as they are technically online just hidden, not incl. individual oneshots/drabbles in collection ‘fics’, of which there are ridiculously many). Offline: 20 (I have the worst habit of just sitting on completed fics and I really need to stop)

In-Progress: 

Too many to name, last time I counted it was ~60 but that wasn’t even including my vld wips so...I don’t actually know. I hoard wips and just switch up what I work on all the time depending on mood/interest levels/effort required. 

Current main focuses are a 50k+ plotty Drarry (*fingerscrossed* cos this is my first time seriously attempting something long (will probably reach 80k at least) in a very long time and I put it down for a few months and thought that was it but then I picked it up again recently, yay!), and re-writing some hidden fics I can’t put them back up in the quality they’re in, I just can’t guys, they’re awful.

I’ve been thinking a lot about working on the longish 8th year Pansmione fic I started for the wlw big bang before I had to pull out of cos stupid life stuff. I might pick that up again for a bit too, couldn’t be more different from the Drarry one so it’d make a nice focus break =)

Coming Soon/Not Yet Started: 

I don’t even plan fics I’m writing, I sure don’t plan ahead to stuff I haven’t even started XD The only think I can think of for this category would be me re-writing my hidden long Drarry fics.

Oh, and there will be a Merthur oneshot coming (hopefully) soon, because @april-thelightfury115​ won my custom fic giveaway with a merthur idea. Just waiting for my brain to cooperate so I can start that and not suck XD but I’m so fucking excited to write some Merthur again, you have no idea.

Oh, and lots more Sapphic September drabbles coming too, I’m way behind and only just posted day 11 cos this month is literal hell for me, but I am still planning on finishing the prompt list, no matter how long it takes, but no plan for those, not even which ships, I just sit down with the next prompt and a blank doc and see what happens.

Do You Accept Prompts: 

Yes, I love writing to prompts, I’m take them via google form here, but I’m in such a bad space with my health I’ve been really struggling with writing lately, managed to do a bit of editing (fuck knows how), but writing new stuff is so hard, so there’s a long wait while I wait for my fibro fog to ease off to the point I can write new stuff with more regularity (and less stupid errors I have to edit out later).

Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write: 

Again, I so don’t plan. But I really want to be making more progress on the long plotty drarry wip I’m trying to write. I’m still not sure I’ll have the guts to post it even if I do finish it, given its subject matter (it would make a great careers or consent fest fic tbh), but damn I’m really excited by it. Not sure I can maintain it being plotty and not revert to focusing on the relationship (which is easier for me), but I can only try and see what happens. (trying to write a non-relationship plot without planning is a nightmare but I don’t have a choice if I want to write it at all XD)

I’m also now excited for my longish pansmione wip too actually, just because it’s already longer than my Dreville long-ish fic and it’s exciting and scary to do longer rarepair stuff. I’m way out of my comfort zone with the fic itself, but I dunno, I re-read some recently and fell in love with it all over again, like, flustered lesbian-awakening, disaster for Pansy (but sure she still hates her) Hermione? YES PLEASE! and also, I am guilty of not writing female characters as much as I should because, well, canonically, they don’t have much depth and I’m very meh about them, but in this there’s a huge focus on them because they’re all determined to band together for 8th year and Hermione is making friends with them (Parvati is like, dragging her along all the time XD) where she once dismissed them so it’s scary but exciting =D I’m getting more practice with all the sapphic I do over on knowyourincantations, so I feel more confident working on this wip now =D

I’m also kind of excited about re-writing my old long fics, because they’re all 3 years old now, and my writing tastes (and skill, yikes) have totally changed, so it’s like I’m writing the story again but how I would write it now while maintaining the overall same plot, so it’s really interesting, like discovering the story all over again. Like in one (Making Malfoy Blush) I’ve gone as far as introducing a new side character to replace another’s parts because I no longer feel those parts are in character for them. It’s super terrifying, but it’s fun at the same time =) it’ll take me forever to do these though, so I dunno about ‘upcoming’ really, I only chip away every now and then when I’m unable to write new stuff but am still coherent enough to do something.

Eh, it is what it is, I can’t write like I used to, hence me being inactive more than active these days, but I’m trying to work within my new limitations instead of getting frustrated with them and just giving up entirely =)

---

Now, who to tag....I think anyone I would tag has already done it, and if not..I blame the fog if I’m forgetting someone obvious, if you wanna do it just say I tagged you so I can be nosy and take a look =)

Again, please do not reblog this post

[katahnisharma]

It’s Official

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Word Count: 3K (not sure if I should do more parts but if you think I should just send me an ask!)

Warnings: None just frustrated reader and slight make out session?

Summary: What happens when a fake date makes you wish it were real?

A/N: Just a one shot requested by @peachfuzz2221 for prompt 23. “Just pretend to be my date” with a slight alteration, hope you like it! 

masterlist || add yourself to my taglist!

You impatiently stirred your coffee, glancing around the cafe as you tapped your foot on the hardwood floor. Tom had called you here, your usual meetup, on some sort of emergency and he wasn’t even here. Who’s late to their own emergency? Frustrated, you were just about to get back to your book when you heard your name.

“Y/N!”

Looking up, you scanned the floor until your eyes fell on a very sweaty and panting Tom, dressed in what appeared to be a button down shirt and a new pair of jeans. Of course the shirt was unbuttoned slightly at the top and he was wearing a pair of hideous sneakers, but it was definitely a change. You narrowed your eyes as he moved through the line at the counter to get to your table, giving you a sheepish grin. He pulled out the chair across from you and was about to sit down when you swung your leg onto it.

“Now just a minute, you called me here remember? You said it was some sort of emergency and could I be here in less than 5 minutes, and so I came because that’s what friends do. But dude, what the hell? You’re forty five minutes late!” you whisper-shouted. Tom sighed and gingerly moved your leg from the chair as he took a seat.

“I’m so sorry Y/N, I really am! I swear it’s an actual emergency. I almost broke five laws trying to get here on time!” Tom cried, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. You huffed.

“Alright, fine. But at least tell me what the emergency is, I had to cancel a date for this.” you said, shutting your book and giving Tom your full attention. Tom looked shell shocked.

“What date, you didn’t tell me you had a date!” he asked, his voice rising in pitch slightly. He looked slightly… jealous?

Okay that’s ridiculous, we’re just friends. Friends Y/N. There’s nothing else here.

“Yeah, it was last minute. Just a guy from work, it’s very casual so it’s probably going to amount to nothing really.” you shrugged, twirling your coffee stirrer in your cup. Tom frowned, fiddling with his fingers.

“Sure, but I’d still liked to have known.” he mumbled, his lips turning downward into a sight pout. You quirked your eyebrows curiously.

“Why? I mean it’s not like you tell me all the girls you go out with Tommy.” Tom’s eyes widened and you could see him mentally backtracking.

“Well, it would have been nice to know. You know, since we’re friends I guess. Not that you have to tell me everything-definitely not everything you know? I mean don’t tell me what you do with dates after because-oh my god I’m going to stop talking now.” Tom babbled, his head hitting the table in embarrassment. Your jaw dropped.

“Ew, Tom! God not on the first date, do you even know me at all?” you laughed, punching him lightly in the arm. Tom looked up and smirked.

“Yeah, you’re not the type. Too much of a good girl I’d say.” he teased, wiggling his eyebrows at you. You scoffed and leant back in your seat, rolling your eyes as you chuckled.

“Uh-huh, sure. So what’s the deal, don’t think I’ve forgotten about your ‘emergency’.” you asked. Tom looked at you nervously.

“Okay, first just hear me out! I know this is crazy but you’re the only person I can think of who would do this for me.” Now you were scared.

“This sounds bad, you better just tell me before I really freak out.” Your hand went to your mouth, biting your knuckles slightly. Tom swallowed loudly.

“Ineedyoutopretendtobemygirlfriend.” He blurted out. You almost choked on your own breath.

“I’m sorry, what now?” Tom hesitated a minute, studying the wtf look etched across your face.

“Yeah, uh, it’s Harry. He started joking that since I don’t have a real girlfriend, he could set me up with someone. And, for obvious reasons, I don’t want him to play matchmaker for me, so I need to prove to him and my family that I can stay with a girl for longer than a couple hours. So maybe, just pretend to be my date?” Tom sighed, running a hand through his hair. Okay hold up, did he just say…

“Wait, why did you say family? Would I have to…” Tom nodded slowly.

“Yeah, I’m going to my parents’ tonight for dinner and I was going to bring you along. Only if you agreed of course, I mean I know it’s weird and totally last minute” You managed a small concession of a smile, even though internally you were freaking out. Oh my god, what if I accidentally say something that complicates everything? And you knew exactly what that something was.

“Wow, I definitely didn’t think the first time meeting your family would be like this. I mean, as your pretend girlfriend.” Tom couldn’t stop himself from laughing.

“So, does that mean you’ll do it? Because I’d be forever in your debt, Y/N, honestly!” he pleaded, giving you his sad puppy eyes and clasping his hands together. You smirked and rolled your eyes.

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll do it. But I’m holding you to that whole debt thing!” you giggled, finally taking another sip of your coffee, while Tom grinned like a maniac.

And that’s what lead you here, on what should have been a typical Friday night of binge-watching TV slash eating insane amounts of ice cream. Or in the case of today, what should have been the first date you’d been on in a very long time.

Well, it’s a date of sorts, you thought, as you smoothed down your hair for the millionth time.

Even if it’s fake.

Whatever, you were determined to have a good time tonight. You looked pretty good, you had to admit. The dress you were wearing was your favorite. It reached just above your knees and was the perfect shade of dark red, the color you looked best in. The waist was cinched, with a asymmetrical hemline that showed off your lower legs and a beautiful off the shoulder neckline. You had done your hair so that it fell loosely in soft waves down your back, and kept the makeup minimal with just some lip gloss.

Maybe this is a bit overdone, this is the first time I’m meeting his family. I don’t want to look ridiculous.

On the other hand, everything else was at the dry cleaners and you probably shouldn’t turn up in a sweatshirt.

You were just debating on whether or not you should make a mad desperate dash to the cleaners for a more casual outfit when the doorbell rang from the other room.

Crap, it’s Tom.

Swallowing loudly, you slowly walked toward the front door.

Here goes.

Opening the door hesitantly, you were met by Tom with a bouquet of flowers. And he looked perfect.

He was wearing one of his numerous black t-shirts and a pair of ripped jeans, but somehow Tom made it look like he was made to wear it. His hair was delightfully curly, and it stuck out slightly like he had just woken up.

Not fair. At all. How does a person do that without even trying?

“Hey, sorry I’m a little early I know but I wanted to give you these and-” Tom started, handing you the flowers with a smile, but he froze when he noticed what you were wearing.

“Oh, Tom these are so nice.” you blushed, as his eyes practically drank you in. He had never seen you look so beautiful. He didn’t even think it was possible for you to look more beautiful. Unconsciously, Tom bit his lip to keep him from grinning like a madman.

“Wow, um, you look so beautiful. Perfect actually… I think. Have-have you worn this dress before?” he stammered, stepping inside as you let him through. You smiled to yourself.

“Yeah, it’s my favorite, but I probably haven’t worn it around you before. We usually don’t do this sort of thing, you know?” you replied, coming to a standstill right in front of Tom. The two of you were now face-to-face, you a blushing mess and he trying really hard not to just come out and say something he’d wished for a while now. That this wasn’t a fake date.

“Well, you should wear it more often, around me. Hope you canceled that date.” he smirked, taking your hand and kissing it. Your face turned bright red and you grinned.

“Yeah, yeah okay lover boy, let’s go.” you joked. Tom chuckled as the two of you joined hands and headed to the car.

The ride to the Hollands’ house was incredibly fun. Tom turned on the radio and the two of you went crazy singing all the songs that came on. Occasionally, Tom would do impressions or sing in a ridiculous voice, which caused the two of you to burst out laughing until you felt like your sides were splitting. It very nearly felt like nothing had changed. But you both knew something did. The way you two looked at each other during the drive was proof enough. Tom kept staring at you with so much love in his eyes that you felt like kissing him right there and then. But you needed to calm down, this was fake remember?

“Do you think they’ll know?” you asked, as you bit your finger nervously. Tom chuckled and took your hand in his as you both waited for someone to answer the door.

“I don’t think so, we look pretty convincing.” he said, giving you a smirk. You blushed a deep scarlet as you tried to bite back a smile.

“Stop, this is serious! It would be sooo awkward if they picked up on it, I’d never be able to come back here!” you hissed. Finally the door swung open and you were face-to-face with Harry, Tom’s younger brother. He looked at the two of you and smiled.

“So… this is Y/N, the one you talk so much about, Tom? I honestly thought you were lying when you said you had an actual girlfriend, but okay. You were right.” he teased, punching Tom lightly in the arm. Tom’s eyes widened.

“Yeah-uh… I mean I talk about you sometimes. Not a lot though! Just a normal amount, you know?” Tom stuttered, glaring at Harry. You quirked an eyebrow.

“Oh-yeah. No problem?” you offered, confused at your own words. What were you saying? He’s just nervous, calm down!

“Ha, yeah um let’s go inside, shall we?” Tom raced, squeezing your hand lightly as you moved past Harry and into the living room. There in the middle, all sitting down, were the famous Holland family. You gulped as you could feel the nerves rising. Oh. My. God.

“Hey everyone, this is Y/N.” Tom said, smiling broadly as he put an arm around your waist. The physical contact made you feel warm and you unconsciously moved closer to him, which he responded to by gripping your waist tighter and drawing small circles on your back.

“Hi!” you said, giving them all your best non-forced-because-i’m-freaking-out smile. It must have worked because Nikki immediately stood up and rushed over to give you a hug.

“Y/N it’s so nice to meet you! We’ve all heard such lovely things about you! We were so happy when Tom finally said he had asked you out.” she beamed, holding you at arms length to get a good look at you. Tom looked at the two of you and grinned, ecstatic.

“Thanks for exposing me Mom” he laughed, as he guided you to sit down next to him. Dom waved at you from across the room

“It’s lovely to meet you Y/N! Why don’t we all eat now, though, I’m really hungry.”

______________________________________________________________________

“So, Y/N? How did you and Tom meet again? No offense, but you both seem pretty different.” Sam asked, as Harry nodded emphatically. Everyone had made it to the dinner table, and were obviously curious about the new girl Tom had actually wanted to stay with. You smiled, Tom looking at you with a smirk.

“You’re definitely right about that. I met Tom at this coffee shop I always go to. He was a little tipsy and asked if the seat across from me was taken. And then he asked me what I was reading and we started talking, it’s a little cliche I know.”

“You were tipsy in a coffee shop?” Dom asked mockingly. Tom groaned and put his head in his hands.

“Well, I’m never going to hear the end of this.” he replied, nudging you. You shrugged.

“Hey, totally not my fault! You shouldn’t have been drinking so early!” You laughed, the two of you locking eyes and smiling for a minute before breaking and coming back to reality. The Hollands looked at each other knowingly.

“Hmm well I wish he wouldn’t party so much, but if it led to him meeting you dear, I can only say it was worth it.” Nikki said, reaching across the table to take your hand. Your jaw dropped slightly before you quickly recovered and smiled slightly.

“That’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.” You whispered, your eyes welling up. God you hated lying like this, Nikki really believed you both.

“Well, I for one think Mom’s right. Too bad Paddy missed out, I knew he shouldn’t have gone camping today.” Harry said. Dom looked up and caught your eye.

“Oh Y/N I meant to ask, what are you studying in university? Tom tells us you’re at the University of London. That’s incredible!” You gave Tom a look of surprise. He told them where I’m going to school? Why? Tom anticipated your thoughts.

“I told them because I’m so damn proud of you babe. It’s an amazing school and I’m an insanely proud boyfriend.” He said, and this time there was no big grin. It was a soft smile, so rare and full of emotion that you were shocked. You’d never seen Tom smile that way before at anyone. For a moment it felt real.

Dom cleared his throat softly and the two of you broke eye contact for the second time, both of you smiling awkwardly.

“Sorry Mr. Holland, I meant to say that I’m studying to become a journalist. A war correspondent actually, like Christiane Amanpour? She’s one of my idols.” You responded, as the twins gave you impressed looks. Dom and Nikki looked at each other with the same expression.

“That’s incredible, I’m very impressed. There aren’t a lot of women who want to be war correspondents so it makes me happy to hear that!” Dom said with Tom nodding beside you.

“It is, but Y/N’s always been that way. She’s a force and she can do anything she sets herself to.” Tom said. You laughed.

“Hardly, I still can’t do a cartwheel!” You replied, and everyone burst out laughing.

After dinner, Tom excused the two of you since it was now pretty late. The Hollands gathered at the front door to say goodbye, with Nikki leading the pack. Just as you had said goodbye to everyone else, Nikki came over to stand in front of you. Tom looked at you, neither of you knowing what was going on. Suddenly, she moved forward and gave you a massive hug. It took you a second, but you finally responded and hugged her back, feeling like you could die right there. Before she let go, she whispered softly into your ear.

“Now, if my son doesn’t officially ask you to be his girlfriend in the next two days, you call me okay? He’d be mad not to and I’d be terribly angry if he didn’t” you gasped softly, but Nikki had pulled away and gave you a small wink. She knew…

“Oh, yes Mrs. Holland thank you so much for having me, I had a lovely time.” You managed, giving her a slight smile which she returned in full. Tom looked back and forth between you two.

“Uh-okay then, we’ll be heading out I guess. Bye Mom, Dad.” He said, giving his parents a hug. The twins smirked at him.

“See you two divs later, yeah?” he smirked back, hugging them as well. You smiled at the sight and smiled even more when Tom gave you his hand and the two of you walked to the car, with the Hollands waving from the door. When the two of you were inside the car, Tom and you sighed quietly.

“Look Tom, today was amazing and I loved meeting your family but I can’t do this. This lying just makes me so uncomfortable, and when Nikki said that stuff at dinner I felt so guilty.” you exhaled. Tom swiveled to look at you.

“Yeah, I know. Which is why there’s something I need to say right now before I chicken out.” he whispered, cupping your face lightly and brushing a loose strand of hair behind your ear. You looked at him, trying to read his expression. What’s going on?

“Tommy?” You whispered back. He smiled at you adoringly.

“I love you Y/N, if you haven’t already noticed because I can’t really keep it to myself very well, so would you want to maybe be my girlfriend? For real this time?” he asked, biting his lip anxiously, nervous for the first time in his life about a girl he didn’t think he’d be able to live without. You felt your heart flutter. You tried to open your mouth to speak but there were no words that could describe how happy you felt in that moment. Tom slowly took his hands away from your face, now aware that you must be rejecting him.

“Sorry, that was weird. Forget it, I’d rather have you in my life than lose you. Is it okay if we just forget this ever happened?” he asked, fumbling around distractedly for his keys. No, it’s not okay, say something Y/N!

“I-Tom-I..” you started and Tom turned to look at you once more, waiting for the words to fall. Screw it.

Before you could rethink it, you leant forward, grabbed his shirt and kissed him hard. Tom was so surprised he froze for a minute, but when he realized what was happening he couldn’t react fast enough. His hands snaked their way down to your waist, pulling you into his lap while he deepened the kiss even further. You moaned quietly as your fingers went to clutch his curls gently, running them through his hair desperately. Tom let out a moan of his own and brought you even closer, before the two of you finally ran out of breath and broke away reluctantly, gasping for air.

“So that’s a yes then?” he chuckled, kissing your neck softly. You brought his hand up to your mouth and laughed.

“Yeah, I’d say so, wouldn’t you?” You asked. Tom looked up at you and smirked.

“You would? Hmm I’d say that was you finally succumbing to my charms.” he whispered into your ear. You gasped.

“Shut up, Tommy, I wasn’t always in love with you! I definitely wasn’t when you came in drunk at the coffee shop.” You giggled, smacking his arm lightly as you rolled of his lap back into your seat. Tom rolled his eyes jokingly.

“Yeah yeah, I guess I wasn’t too attractive that day. You know, I can’t wait to tell them that this is official now.” he grinned, putting the car in reverse with one hand while the other held yours. You smiled and shook your head.

“Um, about that. I think your mom’s not going to be too shocked that this was fake.

“What, why?” You cocked your head slightly.

“Oh, just because. Let’s just say I have a feeling” you replied internally smiling to yourself, as Tom swung your hand up and down.

“You’re a weirdo, but you’re my weirdo. Want to go hit the coffee shop? We can have a cliche You’ve Got Mail kind of first date.” he laughed. You grinned happily.

“Um, yes!” You yelled as you and Tom sped down the road, smiling like lunatics but finally official.

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[themandylion]

2018 Project List

@chibinightowl tagged me on this. I actually used to do regular bunny/WIP updates back in Ye Olde Livejournal days, but clearly I’ve gotten out of the habit.

I really wanted to finish the next fic of Team RedBird by next month, since I’ve finished and posted installments of that series on the same date for the last two years, but I don’t see that happening this year. I’ve got a solid intro, but there’s a lot left to write and there are some plot points I still haven’t figured out (mostly in regards to Bruce’s amnesia and the whole mess that is Mother). This is Big Project #1.

Big Project #2 is a sequel/follow-up/fix-it of @chibinightowl‘s short JayKyle PI AU (or, as I call it, “Kyle Solves Some Mysteries!”). The doc says there’s nearly 7k of this written, but I know about 500 words of that is my outline/babbling and there’s some more in various notebooks that needs typing/fixing. This’ll probably be about 15k spread across three parts and may or may not have a threesome. There will definitely be multiple mysteries and some cliffhangers, because yes.

I have also started on fills for the JayTim week in November because I am super excited!! I don’t wanna say too much and give plot away never mind that I have been doing just that to anyone who’ll listen on the JayTim Discord for the past week, but things I’ve started may include:

A genie AU that has the potential to become something longer in the future.

Another prequel to Of Cats and Conjugals, this one featuring how Stray and Redwing initial hooked up. I may post the first couple scenes as part of JTW and the rest in pieces later, because it’s kind of ballooning as I try to work in backstory I didn’t get to before and it turns into Stray & Redwing’s Great Big European Vacation. This is already over 3k and it’s insane.

Yet another marriage fic, wtf. I did not used to write marriage stories all the time, I swear. They are not, in fact, a favorite of mine, but they somehow keep happening in this fandom. @my-one-love-is-music and I apparently had the same idea for Day 4 of JTW (College/Vegas Wedding), so it’ll be interesting to see what they come up with! I have no idea where this is going, there’s over 2k with no end in sight. I may just start throwing in random tropes.

Urban fantasy AU where Tim is a possessive part-Fae who does not want to share his person with anyone and probably does the cat thing of digging in claws every time Jason tries to take his hand back (and then gives I’m-sorry licks afterwards to apologize for hurting favored person).

I have an idea for a Viking AU and am really put out that the AP apparently got rid of the book I was going to use for reference. Now I’ll have to just use the internet like everyone else, UGH. :\

At some point in time, I’d like to write something more in the space opera universe, but, like. I don’t really have a plooooot?? Just some vague ideas involving Steph’s daughter (who very much exists in that AU). I should probably just bite the bullet and write Damian & Jon’s Adventures in Space Boarding School, but, like. Who would play the part of the dead body? These are questions that keep me up at night.

There are also two long WIPs lingering from my last fandom that I want to theoretically finish at some point in the vague future, but eeeh. That fandom is dead, there’s not much interest, and I don’t want to write fight scenes. >.>

[kimcheolwoon]

sorry if this is annoying/u already answered this but how did you go about getting tickets?

18 days…it’s taken me 18 days to answer this because I am a literal menace and yeah health blah blah blah…but whenever i actually did find the time and energy to sit down and answer this i would get distracted and poof! there it goes…

BUT ANYWAY you’ve probably already like figured everything out because if you’re anything like me, you probably researched relentlessly and asked around and figured out that hey some info isn’t hard to find if you look in the right places with the right words and blah blah i talk too much

ANYWAY ANYWAY i got ticket to SW 2017 special edition in tokyo dome through the SM Global Package (an aggreagate of their current packages are found on their travel website here *make sure to create an account!!!!* and they also have a twitter which sends out updates about tours and packages that will open). I am going to tell you right here and right now and forever DEPENDING ON THE TYPE OF PACKAGE YOU GET/WANT, THIS THING IS NOT CHEAP. IT WILL BREAK YOUR BANK IF YOU DO NOT PROPERLY PLAN/BUDGET. With that said, my package was a total of $979 x 2 because I bought a twin package (which i will talk more about later. wow i am on a roll with words today ^^), but i have seen packages for some tours that are as low as $250 and as high as $1010 (but there is a reason for this huge disparity that i’ve noticed and will comment on later). However, the price for each package includes hotel booking, transportation to and from the venue, and meals. it DOES NOT cover things your flight ticket!! I’m from the US of A. I want you guys to know that after everything…i ended up spending nearly $3k on this trip. (Now $2k was for the package and the flight ticket…but the extra $1k was me splurging on my unworthy friends and buying all the things i needed while in Japan like binoculars and food and souvenirs for myself because fuck i’m in SHINee land!)

Okay so #1 is PACKAGES. i bet you’re like wtf????? I’m gonna use Taemin’s Off Sick GP as an example. 

Every single hmmm is it row or column??? ROW…every single row that you see is a package. These packages, at least for Korean concerts, are grouped by type (deluxe, superior, or economy) and by the number of people attending (single or twin). The single or twin option is actually more for your hotel room booking than anything else. Which is why Twin packages are cheaper by person than singles. They are also divided by “Course”. This is what that means:

Course A and B are always the exact same except for the concert date. (which is why i didn’t include it in the top picture). So essentially for packages, you show up the day before, check in to your hotel, get your nice shi*t, sleep, wake up, eat breakfast if you want (it’s freeee), and then meet up to travel to the concert, go crazy, go back to your hotel, sleep, and if you’re lucky to get a C course, do it all again the next day whoop! The number of courses depend on how many concert dates there are. SM usually always only starts out with the standard two day concert, and then LATER as if it’s some big surprise…will add another day or two. If they do add another day or two and you already purchased a course C GP, no you cannot just have them add the extra dates. You would literally have to buy another GP. DO NOT DO THAT. At that point you’re already in Korea and there’s always people selling extra tickets at the venue the day of a concert or whatever. Just buy a ticket from a local. 

Every GP buyer gets this cool benefit where they get to pre-order goods and idk about yall but i saw those queue lines at TD…i walked those queue lines at TD…i vowed that i would never ever stand in a queue line like that ever. I had friends who went hella early and STILL spent three hours queuing for goods…ONLY FOR THEM TO RUN OUT!!! It’s insaaaane. So yknow what you guys should do? Thank your GO peeps profusely if they ever had to stand in a queue to get goods for you. These things are no joke. 

Deluxe package buyers get the most for their money i swear. When you buy deluxe you stay in the nicest fucking hotel omfg i looked it up and everything. It’s almost always decked out in like pillows and covers and stuff of the artist you’re going to see and you get to take that stuff HOME along with all the other free stuff (i keep refraining myself from saying sh*t because this stuff is not sh*t) that SM gives you. Deluxe peeps also get a free tour of the co-ex atrium where they will literally SHUT DOWN THE ENTIRE STORE just for you guys and they will jam your artist loud through the speakers and monitors land it’s just so so nice. AND they give you a free meal voucher to a nice ass restaurant and/or you can join in the meal that they set up for the deluxe package holders which is ofc hella fricking nice. So I had a lot of people tell me before that getting the GP was not worth your money blah blah and i say one thing YES IT IS YES IT IS YES IT IS! If you wanna go for it because you are afraid of being in a foreign country by yourself, then buy it. If you wanna go for it because you’re like me and cannot get around or book a hotel (under-aged) to save your life, then buy it. If you wanna buy it for all the free stuff and cool activities, then BUY IT. 

Uhm, so disparities between Korean and Japanese concerts. Since SM does not own Japan like they do Korea, things are a lot less limited. For instance, where Korean concert packages will almost never have less than 12 separate packages, Japanese concert packages only have six or less. This is because in Japan SM doesn’t make the distinctions between deluxe, superior, or economy. Everyone stays in the same hotel. Everyone gets the exact same free goods. No one goes on an elaborate tour or eats at an elaborate restaurant. You’re all on the same playing field. The only price difference you’re paying for is course type and twin/single. 

Now now now listen, let me tell you this now…getting a GP for a Korean concert is…how do i say….FUCKING HARD. So before trying for SW 2017, i thought i would mock try for Taemin’s Off Sick concert (the first one) I was on the moment it opened…and there was only 4/12 slots left. His GP sold out in less than three minutes! I had a friend who tried for SWC V last year and literally got KICKED OFF THE PAGE because there was so much traffic. It is gruesome I’ll have you know. But getting a Japanese package is soooo much easier…i wonder why???? No i don’t. It’s because when you’re trying for a Korean concert, you are also competing with Japanese fans for the exact same spots. And there are a lot of them, and chances have it they are way more experienced at this game than you are. So, i’ve had a lot of people tell me that when they’ve went for a Korean concert GP, most of the other participants were Japanese…like 90% of them are Japanese. Which is really not surprising at all considering how almost all SM artists promote in Japan. So my advice for you there is GOOD LUCK MY CHILD cause you’re gonna need it. 

ah this is long. okay last thing (i think, i hope). Japanese GPs are usually more (read: waaay more) expensive than Korean concerts becaaauuuussseee so far, the only GPs SM has done in Japan have been for dome tours. So this is Tokyo Dome, Kyocera Dome and like obviously these are legendary stages that usually bring a different level of concert experience. So i get it. Like yeah hike up those prices! Also, we stayed in the Shinjuku Washington Hotel and idk if yall ever looked into it or anything but 1) it was hella nice and located near a business district in Japan and 2) apparently it was for rich people. So i really enjoyed my time in Japan and i do not regret dropping nearly $1000 to see my favorite concert in Tokyo Dome. And I had such an amazing time in Japan, I can’t possibly regret anything because getting the GP allowed for me to experience a once in a lifetime opportunity. Also our tour guide was the absolute cutest i think i fell in love with her every time she spoke. And i even got into an elevator with her and she talked to me about Jonghyun so i was literally almost dying on the floor because too to too much. Her name was Lily, Such a sweet name for a lovely person. (she was also the tour guide for Jonghyun’s The Letter Agits during one of the weeks and she saw my tote bag i had from his concert and that’s how the convo started and just *dies*)

Okay i think I covered everything (and more)…i refuse to read back through this long thing because aaaahhh i wrote a lot i’m sorry but i hope this compensates for being fuck ass late. (I cuss too much i’m sorry) 

[theheaterishotjournals]

06/16/2020

Statuses

Me: Alright, I guess? Feel stupid? I dunno. Numb? Depression numb?  Sunflower Charlie: So tall. Daniel can’t even reach the top. 7′ now?? Gonna bloom soon.  Sunflower George: Almost reaches Charlie. Rivals.  Sunflower Miriam: 4 blooms! Gonna get more. Bees all the time, so cute. Yellow jackets, less cute. But good for pest control.  Tomato: They’re starting to grow. More flowers coming. Needs pruning.  Mint: Needs pruning. Keeps getting eaten by bugs.  Money plant: After the sun burning, growing so many buds now. Growing nicely. Bigger pot??  Rubber Plant: Doing well.  Pachira: Better now that the fan isn’t pointing at it.  Palm: Surprisingly alive.  Succulents: All good.  Đậu Đen: She’s doing good. Healthy. God, I hope she ain’t pregnant. 

Dear you, 

Today I went to work, still depressed. Elliot was kind enough to ask how I was doing and give me advice. I love Elliot. I don’t care what the rest of the crew says. I’m thankful for him.

Ervin told me he had to call out on Friday as well. He has hypertension. He keeps eating red meat though. I’m worried about him. I wish he could stay forever but come August, a new rotation.

Jeff wore a new hat today. It was, like. A golf cap? Instead of his usual cowboy hat. It looked good on him! I also appreciate Jeff. 

Did runs. Easy day. Picked up Hydrogen Sulfide detector. The jambalaya Daniel made was so delicious. I love that he helps me get my lunch ready. I love Daniel. 

Daniel kept sending me pics of the kitten today. I was so excited to see her. The second work ended, I drove home and ran straight to her (after dealing with mail). She seemed so quiet and lazy. It got me worried. It surprised me to roll her over and see 12 toes on her hind legs. Daniel said not to worry, she was probably napping. I couldn’t help but worry. Worry’s my middle name. Thanks to anxiety. He was trying to get me to calm down and convincing me to eat. 

While eating, I tried to calm down. Told him to put on spongebob. But I kept thinking about what I had read online. The lethargy. Kittens were supposed to have energy. Her gums looked white. She meowed weakly. 

Daniel could tell I was worried. He went out and got Đậu Đen and brought her inside. We had her and her kitty meet. It looked like the kitty kept trying to rub up on her and Đậu Đen kept walking off. It made me cry, I thought she was trying to abandon her. Daniel calmed me down, saying I was just being reminded me of my childhood. Eventually, the kitten kept rubbing up on her mom and Đậu Đen kept licking her like crazy. I felt so much relief. 

We watched the two. The kitten kept weakly going up on her mom. Đậu Đen licked her, ate, and would walk off. I was wondering if we should get the kitten back to Đậu Đen but she wouldn’t take her. We called a hospital earlier, the hospital said hard to tell if it was an emergency and that walk ins would end soon. 

I still didn’t feel right. I looked up a 24 hour animal hospital. I told her she was weak. Then I thought about it and told Daniel to tell them the kitten seemed like she was breathing hard. They said it didn’t sound right. We loaded her up in the cat carrier and took her to the car. 

Đ���u Đen walked with us, we tried to see if she wanted to come in the car with us. She didn’t. I figured ‘cause she had the other two kittens to worry about. We made off to the hospital. 

There was a car there before us. A white couple with a beagle. I noticed the girl wiping away tears. It was hard to see. I wondered if we were taking up valuable timer with our kitten. 

The hospital staff quickly came out and retrieved the kitten. We waited in the car. They quickly called us and said they needed a $500 deposit to get some vitals up. No info on what was wrong. I took a deep breath. I made a lot of money now but $500 was still nothing to sneeze at. I looked at Daniel, he said it was my money. I thought about how I had $2200 in checking and $3k in savings. I said to go for it. 

I took out my embroidery. We joked around. I listened to a podcast. I felt bad joking around while the girl in the car next to us was crying. 

Daniel and I had decided to name the cat. Noticing she was polydactyl on her hind legs, she had 12 toes total. Daniel decided to dub her Doce, the Spanish word for 12. I had named Đậu Đen so it only seemed fair to have one with a Viet name and one with a Spanish name. 

Another call. They took down some info, transferred me to the doctor for the low down. The doctor explained Doce had been infested with fleas. She was a tiny cat, less than 5 weeks. With not much blood to spare, the fleas had sucked her down to nearly nothing. She asked if I had fed her. I told her just sugar water that we fed with a plastic syringe like thing we had used to give Đậu Đen her antibiotics. Then some salmon/water cat treat. I was on the verge of tears telling her this. I thought the doctor was gonna get mad I couldn’t feed her enough.

The doctor merely asked if she ate those things. I told her she did, the cat had licked at them. I think it was a good sign, that it meant Doce still had some energy. The doctor said the kitten was in critical health, knocking on death’s door. It was a good thing we had brought her in. They asked if I was willing to care for the cat, I said I was. She transferred me to billing.

While we were on hold, I joked with Daniel I hope it wasn’t $2k, knowing how much I had in the bank. 

The billing went down. 

“The doctor would like to do this test, that is $200. Then a fecal test for parasites. Another $200.” 

As she listed the items, my stomach dropped. 

The kitten had to be in an oxygen tent. $500. Luckily, she was small so IV would be cheap. Cheap as in $130. Another several hundred for transfusion. Another several hundred for blood test. 

It went on and on and my stomach was clenched. 

“Total comes to around $2,008. Not including the $500 you had put in as deposit earlier. The complete total is $2,508. What would you like to do?”

Was it expectations? Was it my inability to turn people down? I said yes. But I mentioned that I did not have enough in the bank. The billing lady said I could apply for carecredit. 

I immediately remembered the first time I applied for carecredit. I was making $9,000 a year. I had severe dental problems and the dental bill was $1,200. I cried at the dentist’s office. I couldn’t afford it. CareCredit gave no interest for up to two years if you could pay within then. I was so thankful, I thanked them profusely even if they had nothing to do with it. 

I looked at Daniel. He shrugged and told me it was my money. 

With no hesitation, I went on my phone and applied. We called billing. It was all good. The nurse loved Doce’s name. Everyone marveled at the credit limit I was given. I felt somewhat good and happy about that. 

The hospital said we could go home. They handed us the bill. 4 weeks and 3 days, they estimated Doce’s age. 

Daniel went to go get the bill. The couple next to us, I guess they were finally called to bring the dog in. The guy opened the girl for the girl, banged the door on my car. I saw her cradle her dog and hurriedly left. I couldn’t care less they banged my car. I was mad, briefly, like, hey, wtf. Pay attention. But I saw the dog. Remember my car was dinged up anyways. Felt bad I was upset. Told Daniel. He also didn’t care, he also saw how they felt about their dog. 

On the way to get gas, I realized by the time we got home, I’d have nearly 0 hours to relax. I told him he couldn’t tell anyone I spent this much. He agreed. He could tell I felt ashamed. Told me it was my money. Not in a way he didn’t care. But that this was what I wanted to make money for. I wanted to care for others. I wanted to donate most of my money. I’m saving a cat and I was looking for a pet. This is perfect. I asked what if the doctor says the kitten belongs to her mom? He said he’ll try to ask the vet if there’s any way we can keep her. Since it seems she got infested with fleas. We’ll find a way.

I hope so. I hope we can keep her but I just want her to be happy and healthy.

I felt dumb and stupid and insane for dropping this much money on a stray cat I’ve just met. I had to talk to Nevi. Nevi calmed me down, said it wasn’t a waste. 12 years of a cat’s life, this was nothing. I saw my money and knew it wasn’t completely necessary for now. I budgeted for it. I saw the value of the money going toward the cat. He helps me so much. I love Nevi with all my heart as well. 

I watered my plants. I couldn’t sleep. I should be sleeping right now for work tomorrow but I’m too energized and nervous. 

I don’t believe in God, but Daniel saw me do the sign of the cross in the car waiting to hear back on the news for the cat. Even being an agnostic, I find comfort in believing in a higher power. 

I told him he knows I don’t believe in God but does he think God sent the kitten to us? Knowing we could help her? That’s why Đậu Đen tried ot get us to see her kittens. That’s why she left the kitten with us? ‘Cause after the antibiotics, she felt better and she knew we could help her? Did she know? Did God send her right when we were looking for pets, not having one yet, so we had extra money to care for her? 

Did believing in God make me feel less guilty about spending the money on her? I think it did. 

I donated money earlier this week to grassroots organizations that supported BLM. I hope to keep donating more money to those organizations per paycheck. 

I hope that everyone stays happy and healthy. That there’s more community resources. I hope Doce survives and we can take her home and show her to Đậu Đen and Đậu Đen can see how happy and healthy she is. I hope we can be a happy and healthy family.

I love Daniel. I love Nevi. I am going to stay up and do some craft work. I love Daniel even though he’s making me shower in fear of fleas and I hate him for that. 

I go to tomorrow with hope things turn out well. And work goes out well. And Ervin stops listening to conspiracy theories and takes care of himself. I hope BLM works out and we get changes we need. I hope I get enough rest tonight so I can work well tomorrow so I can make money for the cats and for Daniel and for my future pet dog. 

I hope for everyone’s health and happiness. 

-Vi