#naomi s. baron

[the---hermit]

How We Read Now by Naomi S. Baron

I don't know where this book review will go, but to be honest I can predict it will kinda look like a rant at some point, because me and this book got beef. The worse 25 euros I have ever had to spend for uni. This is one of the books I have to study for my history of libraries and reading class, and if it weren't for that I would have dnf-ed this pretty quickly.

This is a non-fiction book that focuses on the differences between physical, digital and audiobooks. Its aim is to analize data to conclude on which is the best option for learning. It is said that the audience it is aimed at is made of teachers, educators and parents. I don't know if it was reading it from a student perspective, but the tone of the author felt so patronizing. It was incredibly annoying, and the worse thing is that I agree with a good amount of what the author is writing about, but the tone was so annoying it made it difficult to read and to agree with. There's so many things I didn't like about this book, I don't even know if I'll remember all of them. The general critique I have read about this book is that it's pretty dry, because there's a lot of statistics, and technical stuff about researches and analysis they did. It's true, but it's not the worse part of the book in my oprion. Firstly this book is so repetitive it hurts. If you could eliminate all the times the author adds unnecessary lines to say "as we have said in chapter x" or "as we will see in chapter y" the book would miss a good 50 pages at least, it was so overdone it made it difficult to focus on what the author was trying to say (and to be honest at a certain point it looked like it was simply a way to make the book longer). And then as if that wasn't enough the chapters in which she tries to give advices on how to have the best results from different types of reading the tips are always more or less the same for all three kinds of books, so again repetitive like crazy. While we are on the topic of these tips let's just say that they are beyond the line of being banal. I spent all that money and time to have someone tell me that to have a productive reading session I have to focus on what I read and minimize the potential distractions. As I mentioned reading it from a student perspective made the tone of the author feel incredibly patronizing, anytime she talks about students it feels like she comes from the point of view that all young people are drowned by technology and social media to the point of being stupid. I am not saying this is the opinion of the author, but it's the feeling I got while reading the entire book, and it was so annoying. Another thing I personally didn't like at all is how this person is trying to find the way™ to get people to read productively, almost without considering that not only everyone has their preferences but depending on what and how you study and who you are things might change drastically. The general idea given by the author is that at the end of the day you should mix mediums but physical books are the best for learning/studying. I do agree, because I prefer physical book, but the way this opinion is carried in the book made me want to disagree just to go against the author. Not the most mature way of dealing with this but that was my natural reaction. Overall the writing annoyed me so much to the point I struggled to focus, and against the author's advices I did way more skimming than close reading because of how repetitive this thing was. I do not recommend at all this book, it's not worth it. Read articles online if you are interested on the topic, this was a waste of money, ans if you couldn't tell I am still very much pissed at this book.

I read this for the non fiction prompt of the 2023 genre bingo.

[tinynavajoreads]

I just finished reading Legends & Lattes by Travis Baldree and I have to say that it has been a while since a book make me giggle and guffaw and want to find minis as close to the characters as possible so I can paint them! They are so lovely and I want to visit Viv's coffee shop so badly now!

I'm also currently making my way through the other two books, Words Onscreen: the Fate of Reading in a Digital World by Naomi S. Baron and Anime: a Critical Introduction by Rayna Denison. Words Onscreen is more for my personal enjoyment and Anime is for a class I'm helping out with this semester.

Both are interesting to me for the reasons I picked them, but also because I never would have thought to pick them up when I was younger. One, I never thought the way I read words, on a screen vs. on a page of paper, would affect the way I absorb information, and two, didn't know there were scholarly readings on anime to very honest. But I'm learning more everyday and I love it!

What books have you dived into this past week or weekend? Why did you choose to pick them up?

[jhavelikes]

The most nauseating, addictive thing about writing is the uncertainty—and I don’t mean the is-anyone-reading? or will-I-make-rent? kind. The uncertainty I’m talking about dogs the very act. This business of writing an essay, for instance: Which of ten thousand possible openings to choose—and how to ignore the sweaty sense that the unseen, unconceptualized ten thousand and first is the real keeper? Which threads to tug at, without knowing where they lead, and which to leave alone? Which ideas to pick up along the way, to fondle and polish and present to an unknown reader? How to know what sentence best comes next, or even what word? A shrewd observer will note that I am complaining about the very essence of writing itself, but that has been the long-held privilege of writers—and they enjoyed it in the secure comfort of their uniqueness. Who else was going to do the writing, if not the writers who grouse about writing? Now along come these language engines, with suspiciously casual or mythopoeic names like ChatGPT or Bard, that suffer not an iota of writerly uncertainty. In what can only be called acts of emesis, they can pour out user manuals, short stories, college essays, sonnets, screenplays, propaganda, or op-eds within seconds of being requested for them. Already, as Naomi S. Baron points out in her book Who Wrote This?, readers aren’t always able to tell if a slab of text came out of a human torturing herself over syntax or a machine’s frictionless innards. (William Blake, it turns out, sounds human, but Gertrude Stein does not.) This unsettles Baron, a linguist who has been writing about the fate of reading for decades now. And it appears to be no lasting consolation that, in some tests, people still correctly recognize an author as artificial. Inexorably, version after version, the AIs will improve. At some point, we must presume, they will so thoroughly master Blakean scansion and a chorus of other voices that their output—the mechanistic term is only appropriate—will feel indistinguishable from ours.

AI and the End of the Human Writer | The New Republic

[engineofourdisruption]

AI impacts our ability to express ourselves

[bunkerblogwebradio]

Por que cientistas defendem livros didáticos em papel

Dá para abrir mão de livros físicos e estudar só nas telas? Como isso afeta o desempenho dos alunos em idade escolar - e a sua capacidade de leitura?

Essa discussão foi alimentada pelo anúncio, agora parcialmente revertido, da Secretaria de Educação do Estado de São Paulo, de que alunos da rede pública nos anos finais do ensino fundamental e no ensino médio contariam apenas com livros didáticos digitais, e não mais em papel.

O Ministério Público Estadual abriu uma apuração do caso (mais detalhes abaixo na reportagem), e o governador Tarcísio de Freitas acabou afirmando que tanto livros didáticos impressos quanto digitais serão ofertados.

Diferentes acadêmicos e entidades debatem o quanto do material didático deve ou não migrar ao ambiente digital, mas evidências científicas sugerem que o papel ainda é o meio mais eficiente para ensinar a habilidade de leitura aprofundada e crítica - particularmente em países com tantas desigualdes como o Brasil.

Ao mesmo tempo, há pesquisadores que lamentam que questões igualmente importantes - como a qualidade dos livros - têm sido ofuscadas pela mera oposição entre papel e digital.

A leitura em papel

Alguns dados importantes nessa discussão vêm do Pisa, o principal exame internacional a comparar o aprendizado em vários países.

No ano passado, a entidade organizadora do exame, a OCDE (Organização para a Cooperação e Desenvolvimento Econômico), identificou que estudantes de 15 anos que tinham o hábito de lerem livros em papel fizeram em média 49 pontos a mais na prova de leitura do Pisa 2018, em comparação com os jovens que raramente ou nunca liam livros.

Esses 49 pontos equivalem a mais ou menos 10% da pontuação média total dos países na prova de leitura do Pisa.

Além disso, estudantes com o hábito de ler em papel também costumavam demonstrar mais prazer com a leitura do que aqueles que liam textos digitais.

"Os resultados do Pisa confirmam que o acesso a capital cultural, como livros, é um forte preditor do desempenho dos estudantes", aponta a OCDE.

A leitura digital tem vantagens importantes, como poder rapidamente buscar fontes de informação e checar dados. Mas uma preocupação dos cientistas é de que, nas telas, nossa leitura seja mais superficial do que no papel - ou seja, de que "passamos os olhos", em vez de ler de verdade.

"As pesquisas dos últimos dez anos mostram que, se você medir a compreensão - o quantas pessoas se lembram do que leem -, ela é quase sempre melhor no texto impresso, especialmente para textos longos", diz a pesquisadora Naomi S. Baron, professora emérita de Linguística da American University em Washington (EUA).

O texto impresso convida a uma leitura mais lenta e concentrada do que o texto em tela, que geralmente é ditado pelo ritmo das redes sociais e do multitasking, agrega Baron.

"Muito do que fazemos no mundo digital é veloz: olhar para um post no Facebook, uma foto no Instagram, os resultados de jogos de futebol, e daí seguir adiante. Com o texto impresso, presumindo que você não vai estar checando o seu telefone, você tende a focar mais."

Leitura crítica e 'impaciência cognitiva'

A experiência sensorial do texto impresso - de manusear e voltar ou avançar páginas manualmente - também parece favorecer a concentração, segundo Baron.

Nas suas pesquisas com jovens em idade escolar, diz ela, "eles nos dizem que, se estão lendo uma história de ficção, conseguem ser muito mais absorvidos pela leitura (em papel) e se identificar com personagens".

Ponto semelhante já foi levantado pela neurocientista americana Maryanne Wolf, cujas pesquisas sugerem que a leitura superficial poderia prejudicar a capacidade humana de entender argumentos complexos, de fazer análises críticas e até de criar empatia por pontos de vista diferentes.

Em entrevista em 2019, ela argumentou que nossa habilidade de ler e interpretar não é inata: depende de circuitos cerebrais que levaram milhares de anos para serem desenvolvidos até o ponto atual, em que conseguimos processar argumentos, sutilezas, ironias e emoções expressos na forma de texto.

"É isso o que me preocupa nos mais jovens: eles estão desenvolvendo uma impaciência cognitiva que não favorece (a leitura crítica)", disse na época Wolf, que é pesquisadora da Universidade da Califórnia em Los Angeles e autora de O Cérebro no Mundo Digital - Os desafios da leitura na nossa era.

"Deixamos de estar profundamente engajados no que estamos lendo, o que torna menos provável que sejamos transportados para um entendimento real dos sentimentos e pensamentos de outra pessoa."

No âmbito da educação pública, um caso que tem sido observado por especialistas é o da Suécia, que a partir de 2015 investiu na digitalização de seus materiais didáticos a partir da pré-escola, mas agora avalia ter ido "longe demais".

Em entrevista à imprensa local, a ministra de Educação, Lotta Edholm, se queixou do excesso de telas e de os livros estarem mais ausentes da vida das crianças desde a digitalização.

Qualidade dos livros

Mas há questões importantes que se perdem quando o debate meramente coloca os dois meios de leitura em campos opostos, em vez de identificar qual o melhor contexto para cada um, diz a professora Natalia Kucirkova, que pesquisa o tema na Universidade de Stavanger, na Noruega.

"É uma pena que por tanto tempo se persista nessa dicotomia de 'impresso versus digital', porque, na verdade, as tecnologias já estão integradas nas experiências do dia a dia", argumenta Kucirkova.

Ela defende que o foco seja direcionado à qualidade dos livros (impressos ou digitais) e como cada meio pode proporcionar uma experiência de aprendizado e de engajamento diferente.

Como exemplo, Kucirkova diz que tem experimentado com livros digitais sensoriais, que incorporem na leitura em tela a experiência tátil e olfativa que é tão valiosa na leitura em papel.

Ela também defende livros digitais que não sejam meras cópias em PDF de seus pares impressos, mas sim agreguem personagens que interajam ou sejam controlados pelo jovem leitor.

O desafio, aí, é garantir que essa experiência interativa engaje a criança, em vez de distraí-la da leitura, explica a pesquisadora. Mas, se esse obstáculo for superado, livros do tipo têm potencial de favorecer a leitura em contextos novos.

"Por exemplo, de avós que possam compartilhar pelo Zoom o mesmo livro digital com netos que estejam distantes. (...) Já existe também uma biblioteca de livros digitais criada para atender crianças ucranianas refugiadas, que foram separadas de seus livros físicos", ela explica.

Além disso, Kucirkova diz que crianças que demonstram menos interesse pela leitura - os quais ela chama de "leitores relutantes" - também podem ter a chance de encontrar prazer nas histórias digitais.

Mas como esse debate se insere no Brasil, que ainda não equalizou o acesso nem à educação, nem à tecnologia?

Paula Adamo Idoeta

[swldx]

RNZ Pacific 1308 8 Mar 2023

7390Khz 1259 8 MAR 2023 - RNZ PACIFIC (NEW ZEALAND) in ENGLISH from RANGITAIKI. SINPO = 45434. English, s/on w/bellbird int. until pips and news @1300z anchored by Koroi Hawkins. The initial estimate of the recovery cost following Vanuatu’s twin cyclone disaster is estimated at six billion vatu (US$50 million). Cyclones Judy and Kevin caused extensive damage and plunged parts of Vanuatu into a state of emergency. However, Prime Minister Ishmael Kalsakau said the true cost is yet to be determined. He said at the moment he is focused on reinstalling confidence back in the system. While communication in Port Vila is, for the most part, up and running, lines to other islands remain cut off. Former Fiji Prime Minister Frank Bainimarama has resigned from Parliament just two weeks after copping a three-year suspension for making seditious comments. The appointment of former Nauruan president Baron Waqa to the Pacific's most senior diplomatic posting has drawn criticism from human rights groups and former political opponents. Mr Waqa, who has a controversial record on human rights and press freedom, has been selected to lead the Pacific Islands Forum as secretary-general starting next year. The choice was part of a deal to bring Micronesian countries back into the fold after they threatened to leave the intergovernmental body in 2021. But there are already calls to reconsider Mr Waqa's appointment to the position, which was announced at a special meeting of Pacific leaders last week. In her speech to mark International Women's Day on Wednesday the Samoa Prime Minister, Fiame Naomi Mataafa, spoke of the benefits that would accrue from gender equality. She said less than seven percent of women are national leaders when Sustainable Development Goal No 5 says gender equality means ensuring full and effective participation and equal opportunities for leadership. A new, university-wide platform is gearing up for launch in April with a goal to build Pacific research leadership and excellence. It will act as a landing place and home for all Pacific researchers at Waipapa Taumata Rau. Commentators have been calling for the Commerce Commission to step in and investigate bank profits, with one campaigner finding banks were making $2000 a year per New Zealander in profit with mortgage margins four times higher than in the UK. Former Labour minister Ruth Dyson has admitted she has not read the code of conduct governing her position as a Crown entity board member. The revelation comes after fresh attention on Dyson's tweets promoting Labour and attacking the National Party despite a requirement she remain politically neutral. North Korean leader Kim Jong Un probably will test a nuclear device again in his drive to build a nuclear arsenal that he sees as "the ultimate guarantor" of his rule. Kim also is likely to continue firing nuclear-capable missiles in an effort to normalize Pyongyang's missile testing. It would be the first nuclear test by North Korea since 2017. Sports. @1308z "Pacific Waves" anchored by Lydia Lewis. Backyard fence antenna, Etón e1XM. 100kW, beamAz 35°, bearing 240°. Received at Plymouth, United States, 12912KM from transmitter at Rangitaiki. Local time: 0659.

[lindsaywesker]

Deaths In 2022 (to date)

January

5: Jessie Lee Daniels a.k.a Jessie D, 57, American singer (Force MDs)

6: Peter Bogdanovich, 82, American film director (‘The Last Picture Show’/’Paper Moon’/’What’s Up Doc?’)

Sidney Poitier, 94, Bahamian actor (‘In The Heat Of The Night’/’Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner?’

Calvin Simon, 79, American musician (Parliament/Funkadelic)

7: R. Dean Taylor, 82, Canadian singer/songwriter (‘Indiana Wants Me’/’There’s A Ghost In My House’)

8: Marilyn Bergman, 93, American songwriter (‘You Don’t Bring Me Flowers’/’The Way We Were’/’The Windmills Of Your Mind’)

9: James Mtume, 76, American songwriter/producer (‘The Closer I Get To You’/’Juicy Fruit’)

12: Ronnie Spector, 78, American R&B singer (The Ronettes)

13: Sonny Turner, 83, American soul singer (The Platters)

15: Jon Lind, 73, American songwriter/musician (‘Save The Best For Last’/’Crazy For You’)

Nino Cerruti, 91, Italian business man/stylist (founder of Cerruti)

18: Dick Halligan, 78, American musician (founding member of Blood, Sweat & Tears)

20: Meatloaf, 74, American singer (‘I’d Do Anything For Love’) & actor (‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’)

21: Louie Anderson, 68, American comedian/actor (‘Coming To America’)

23: Thierry Mugler, 73, French fashion designer

February

2: Monica Vitti, 90, Italian actress (‘L’Avventura’)

6: Syl Johnson, 85, American soul and blues singer (father of Syleena)

8: Bamber Gascoigne, 87, English TV presenter (‘University Challenge’)

9: Betty Davis, 77, American soul and funk singer

Ian McDonald, 75, English musician (King Crimson/Foreigner)

12: Ivan Reitman, 75, Czechoslovak film director (‘Ghostbusters’/’Meatballs’)

16: Jack Smethurst, 89, English actor (‘Love Thy Neighbour’)

19: Gary Brooker, 76, English singer/songwriter/musician (Procol Harum)

22: Mark Lanegan, 57, American rock musician/singer (Queens Of The Stone Age)

24: Sally Kellerman, 84, American actress (‘M*A*S*H’)

27: MC Skibadee, 47, English drum & bass artist/MC

March

3: Denroy Morgan, 76, Jamaican singer/musician (father of Morgan Heritage)

4: Rod Marsh, 74, Australian cricket player

Shane Warne, 52, Australian cricket player

Lynda Baron, 82, English actress (‘Open All Hours’)

11: Timmy Thomas, 77, American soul singer (‘Why Can’t We Live Together?’)

12: Traci Braxton, 50, American soul singer (The Braxtons) (sister of Toni)

13: William Hurt, 71, American actor (‘Altered States’, ‘Broadcast News’)

25: Taylor Hawkins, 50, American drummer (Foo Fighters)

Bobby Hendricks, 84, American soul singer (The Drifters)

29: Donald Shaw a.k.a. Tabby Diamond, 66, Jamaican singer (The Mighty Diamonds)

April

1: Fitzroy Simpson a.k.a. Bunny Diamond, 70, Jamaican singer (The Mighty Diamonds)

C. W. McCall, 93, American country singer (‘Convoy’)

3: June Brown, 95, English actress (‘Eastenders’)

12: Gilbert Gottfried, 67, American comedian/actor (‘Saturday Night Live’/‘Aladdin’)

24: Andrew Woolfolk, 71, American saxophonist (Earth, Wind & Fire)

26: Klaus Schulze, German composer/musician (Tangerine Dream)

30: Naomi Judd, 76, American singer/songwriter (The Judds)

May

6: Jewell, 53, American R&B singer (First Lady Of Death Row Records)

8: Dennis Waterman, 74, English actor/singer (‘Minder’/’The Sweeney’)

15: Kay Mellor, 71, writer/actress (‘Families’/’Fat Friends’)

17: Vangelis, 79, Greek musician (Jon & Vangelis/’Chariots Of Fire’)

19: Bernard Wright, 58, American jazz and soul musician/singer

26: Ray Liotta, 67, American actor (‘Goodfellas’/’Field Of Dreams’)

Andy Fletcher, 60, English keyboardist (Depeche Mode)

29: Lester Piggott, 86, English jockey

June

5: Dom Phillips, 57, British music journalist (editor, Mixmag)

6: Jim Seals, 79, American singer/songwriter/musician (‘Summer Breeze’)

9: Julee Cruise, 65, American singer (‘Falling’)/actress (‘Twin Peaks’)

17: Ken Williams, 83, American songwriter (‘Everybody Plays The Fool’)

22: Patrick Adams, 72, writer/musician/producer (Musique/Universal Robot Band/Inner Life/Black Ivory)

July

4: Mona Hammond, 91, Jamaican actress (‘Desmonds’/’Eastenders’)

5: Manny Charlton, 80, Scottish rock guitarist (Nazareth)

6: James Caan, 82, American actor (‘The Godfather’/’Rollerball’)

8: Tony Sirico, 79, American actor (‘Goodfellas’/’The Sopranos’)

11: Monty Norman, 94, English composer (‘James Bond Theme’)

14: William Hart, 77, American soul singer (The Delfonics)

15: Paul Ryder, 58, English bass player (Happy Mondays)

21: Taurean Blacque, 82, American actor (‘Hill Street Blues’)

23: Bob Rafelson, 89, American film director (‘Five Easy Pieces’/’The Postman Always Rings Twice’)

24: David Warner, 80, English actor (‘Tron’/’Titanic’/’The Omen’)

25: Sandy Roberton, 80, Scottish record producer (Steeleye Span)

Paul Sorvino, 83, American actor (‘Goodfellas’/’Law & Order’)

27: Bernard Cribbins, 93, English actor/singer (‘The Railway Children’/’Doctor Who’)

Tom Springfield, 88, English musician/songwriter (The Springfields) (older brother of Dusty)

30: Nichelle Nichols, 89, American actress (‘Star Trek’)

August

5: Issey Miyake, 84, Japanese fashion designer

7: Roger E. Mosley, 83, American actor (‘Magnum, P.I.’)

8: Lamont Dozier, 81, American singer/songwriter/producer (‘Going Back To My Roots’)

Olivia Newton-John, 73, English singer/actress (‘Grease’)

9: Raymond Briggs, 88, English children’s writer (‘The Snowman’)

11: Anne Heche, 53, American actress (‘Psycho’/’Donnie Brasco’)

16: Duggie Brown, 82, English comedian/actor

18: Josephine Tewson, 91, English actress (‘Keeping Up Appearances’/’Last Of The Summer Wine’)

22: Creed Taylor, 93, American jazz trumpeter/founder of CTI Records

25, Inez Foxx, 84, American R&B singer (‘Mockingbird’)

September

2: Angus Gaye a.k.a. Drummie Zeb, 62, English reggae drummer (Aswad)

8: Mavis Nicholson, 91, Welsh writer/broadcaster

12: Ramsey Lewis, 87, American jazz pianist/composer

13: Jean-Luc Godard, 91, French film director (‘Breathless’)

Jesse Powell, 51, R&B singer (‘All I Need’)

16: Marva Hicks, 66, American R&B singer/actress

22: Stu Allan, 60, Welsh dance music artist (Clock)/radio broadcaster

John Hartman, 72, American drummer (The Doobie Brothers)

23: Louise Fletcher, 88, American actress (‘One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest’)

24: Pharoah Sanders, 81, American jazz saxophonist

28: Coolio, 59, American rapper (‘Gangsta’s Paradise’)/actor

October

4: Loretta Lynn, 90, American country singer/songwriter

6: Ivy Joe Hunter, 82, American songwriter (‘Dancing In The Street’)

11: Angela Lansbury, 96, English actress (‘Murder She Wrote’)

13: Joyce Sims, 63, American R&B singer/songwriter (‘Come Into My Life’)

14: Robbie Coltrane, 72, Scottish actor/comedian (‘Cracker’/’Harry Potter’)

20: Bettye Crutcher, 83, American songwriter (‘Who’s Making Love?’)

Josephine Melville, 61, English actress (‘Eastenders’/’The Bill’)

24: Leslie Jordan, 67, American actor (‘Desperate Housewives’/’Will & Grace’/’Ally McBeal’)

27: Geraldine Hunt, 77, American R&B singer (‘Can’t Fake The Feeling’)

28: Jerry Lee Lewis, 87, American singer/musician (‘Great Balls Of Fire’)

November

1: Takeoff, 28, American rapper (Migos)

3: Noel McKoy, 62, English soul singer

5: Aaron Carter, 34, American singer

Tyrone Downie, 66, Jamaican keyboardist (Bob Marley & The Wailers)

7: Leslie Phillips, 98, English actor (‘Doctor In The House’/’Carry On’ films)

8: Dan McCafferty, 76, Scottish rock singer (Nazareth)

9: Gal Costa, 77, Brazilian singer

11: Keith Levene, 65, English guitarist (The Clash/Public Image Ltd.)

Rab Noakes, 75, Scottish musician (Stealers Wheel)

21: Wilko Johnson, 75, English guitarist (Dr. Feelgood)/actor (‘Game Of Thrones’)

25: Irene Cara, 63, American singer (‘Flashdance’)/actress (‘Fame’)

30: Christine McVie, 79, English singer/songwriter/musician (Fleetwood Mac)

December

5: Kirstie Alley, 71, American actress (‘Cheers’)

Jim Stewart, 92, record producer/co-founder of Stax Records

6: Jet Black, 84, English drummer (The Stranglers)

9: Ruth Madoc, 79, English actress (‘Hi-De-Hi’)

10: J. J. Barnes, 79, American R&B singer

11: Angelo Badalamenti, 85, American film and TV composer (‘Blue Velver/’Twin Peaks’

13: Sol Amarfio, 84, Ghanaian drummer (Osibisa)

16: Rick Anderson, 75, American bass player (The Tubes)

17: Mike Hodges, 90, English screenwriter/director (‘Get Carter’/’Pulp’/’Flash Gordon’)

18: Terry Hall, 63, English singer (The Specials/Fun Boy Three)/songwriter (‘Our Lips Are Sealed’)

Martin Duffy, 55, English keyboard player (Felt/Primal Scream)

19: Sonya Eddy, 55, American actress (‘Barbershop’/’Daddy Day Care’/’Coach Carter’/’Seinfeld’)

20: Iain Templeton, English drummer (The La’s/Shack)

21: Harvey Jett, 73, American guitarist (Black Oak Arkansas)

22: Thom Bell, 79, Jamaican-born American artist/songwriter/arranger/producer (‘Betcha By Golly Wow’/’I’ll Be Around’/’You Are Everything’/’The Rubberband Man’/’La-La (Means I Love You’))

23: George Cohen, 83, English footballer (member of 1966 World Cup-winning side)

[atlabeth]

(not so) simple pt2 - anthony bridgerton

masterlist

summary: coercing lord bridgerton into pretending to court you to avoid the affections of a baron is very simple — that is, until it isn't.

a/n: okayyy attempt no2 in trying to get this thing to show up in tags lol. i worked way too hard on this for it to just be invisible and idk what word i used that tumblr doesnt like but im gonna try again lmao (thank u naomi for the advice)

im gonna keep the other one for now so there's just gonna be two versions of this floating around for a lil lol. hopefully this works

wc: 7.1k

warning(s): historical inaccuracies, basically all fluff

Anthony had a surprising pep in his step as he returned to his estate. Promenading around the marketplace with you was… nice. He had to admit it. The reticule he’d selected for you went perfectly with your dress—another thing he had to admit, you looked quite lovely in blue. 

He blinked a few times. This ruse was already getting to his head.  

But as nice as the promenade was, it was certainly not in his schedule, and so once he passed through into his estate with nods of greeting to the doormen, he had the intent of heading straight to his office. He was not given the chance, though, when he saw his mother coming down the stairs. Anthony had the briefest thought of avoiding her, but only one look at her showed that he would not get the chance even if he wanted it. 

“You were gone quite early today, Anthony,” she said with a slight smile, folding her hands in front of her as she stopped in front of him. “I don’t suppose this has anything to do with Miss Worthing.” 

“And if it does?” he asked offhandedly. 

“Then I am very proud of you,” Violet said. “If Miss Y/N will make you happy, then I see no reason for you not to pursue her. She is a lovely lady with an amiable family—it is all the better that we are already good friends.”

Anthony hummed in acknowledgment. He almost wished his mother did not approve of you so — he did not know if he would have the heart to explain to her the reality of their situation once the two of you parted ways. 

“Is there anything else you would like to tell me?” she asked, and though her tone was pointedly innocent, Anthony was well aware she wanted to fish for anything she could find. 

“We enjoyed a lovely promenade this morning,” Anthony said, “that is all. And as much as I am enjoying this interrogation, there is work I must attend to.”

She gave him a knowing smile as she bowed her head. “Of course, dearest. Enjoy the rest of your morning. Just do not forget to break your fast.” 

He nodded back at her politely before he continued on to his office. When he opened the door, though, he nearly jumped out of his skin. 

“Anthony!” Eloise popped up from her seat—her smile was inviting, but all the years of living with her had taught Anthony that, in the case of his dearest sister, appearances were often deceiving. 

“Eloise,” he said stiffly, trying to hide his obvious shock at his sister’s appearance to avoid any teasing as he walked behind his desk, gathering some papers and stacking them just to give his hands something to do, “may I ask what you are doing in here?” 

“You may,” she said as she placed her hands on the top of the chair, “but only if I am allowed to ask a question of my own.” 

“Do I even want to know?” he asked dryly. 

She did not give him the opportunity to back out. “I am here because you have decided to court my best friend. Which leads into my question—why, for the love of all that is good, have you decided to court my best friend?” 

Anthony laughed and shook his head. “So that is what this is about? I am courting Miss Worthing because I am a man in need of a wife and she is a woman in need of a husband. Is that simple enough for you?” 

Eloise shook her head. “Explain to me, brother, in true form, why you have decided to take away my best friend in quite possibly the worst way.” 

Anthony frowned. “I do not see how I have taken her away from you.” 

“You are courting her!” she exclaimed, “you are to marry her! Anthony, you are going to marry my best friend! That is the most horrid thing I have ever heard of!” 

“I am not forcing her into a marriage, Eloise,” Anthony said. “Have you considered that she is the one that approached me in the first place?” 

Eloise scoffed. “She would never do such an ill minded thing. And frankly, I cannot see why you would engage in activity like this, with her of all women! Not even a day earlier we were airing our frustrations at the very concept of marriage, all the while you could not cease your ranting of her apparent misgivings, and now you are not only courting her, but she is allowing you to do so willingly?” She threw up her hands in disbelief. “It is unforeseeable!” 

“Unfor— unforeseeable?” Anthony could not help but laugh at his sister’s dramatics. “Eloise, is my courting of Miss Worthing truly that strange? She is the sole child of one of the ton’s poorer families, and she is rapidly approaching spinster age. Perhaps she has finally realized her views will not help her family and this is her attempt to make amends before it is too late.” 

Eloise shook her head as she finally sat down. “You do not know Y/N like I do, dearest brother. We were due to meet for a promenade of our own tomorrow, but if she is so capable of providing you with one, then I assume she is more than willing to indulge my presence this morning instead.” 

“Eloise—” Anthony started, and she looked at him with raised brows as he rapidly stood up from his desk, nearly poised to lunge over the thing. 

“Such athletics,” she remarked, and he huffed. 

Anthony walked around his desk to the door and glanced outside to ensure their privacy, and then he shut it behind him. Though all of their employees were loyal and trustworthy, he was well aware of what insidious gossips some of the staff could be when they had something good enough in their hands. “If I am to inform you of… further knowledge, you must promise not to speak a word of it to anyone.” 

Eloise could barely manage to hide her excitement. “So there is something you are not telling me!” 

He sighed deeply and pressed a hand to his forehead. “It is not… a true courtship, in a matter of words. She wanted to avoid a betrothal to Lord Cardew, and so she approached me that night and all but begged me to act as her courter. I agreed, and we are now each other’s fake partners for our own benefit. We both get to dodge any suitors that may come our way, and we will part from each other at the end of the season as spinster and rake alike.”

Her eyes widened. “You must be joking.”

Anthony shook his head. “Regretfully, I am not. What possessed me to accept her offer the other night I am not quite sure, but regardless of it all, we are bound to each other for the length of the season.”

“But it is nothing more than a scheme,” she said, “right?” 

“Yes,” he assured. “There is nothing between us, and we are certainly not to be wed. You need not worry.” 

Eloise sighed. “Anthony Bridgerton, I do not think I will ever understand what goes on in your mind.”

He offered a thin smile. “Nor I, sister. But now that you know something with quite a bit of weight—”

“I will not repeat a word,” she confirmed with a nod. “You needn’t worry. But, ah—” Eloise gave him a coy smile— “you will need to worry about nearly every other thing. We are such close friends for a reason.”

Anthony simply sighed. “You are truly skilled at lifting spirits.”

“I know,” she said happily. 

And as Eloise turned to leave, she stopped by the door, her eyes twinkling with amusement. “You know, brother—I think I will enjoy this season after all.”

Anthony sat back down as he rubbed his hand against his forehead, heaving another labored sigh. It was hardly even past the time to break his fast and he was already exhausted. 

When even Eloise was on board with this horrible idea solely for her own enjoyment of a surely sinking ship, he knew he was certainly in for something.

-

You did not think you would ever truly get used to this.

You may have despised the season, the ton, and everything it stood for, but that did not mean you were immune to marveling at the riches of your peers. The Kennington estate was far grander than you could have ever imagined, and though you despised it, you could not help the streak of jealousy that ran through you at the sight — perhaps if your family were blessed with riches of this sort, you would not be depended on so heavily to find a husband. 

Nevertheless, you were expected to be at the ball, which Lady Kennington had decreed an event that absolutely could not be missed. After her daughter had been chosen as the season’s diamond by word of the queen, she had gained a bit of an ego. It was no surprise, then, that the party was something so extravagant. 

When you arrived, men and women were twirling across the dance floor together, their movements fluid as water. Musicians sat together off to the side, stringed instruments played in perfect harmony, and of course, in the midst of it all, members of the ton stood, watching and gossiping. 

You inhaled deeply and let it out slowly, trying not to let your nerves get the best of you before anything had even taken place. With the exuberance of it all, it was difficult not to be overwhelmed, but knowing you had the protection of Anthony’s courtship eased your worries the slightest bit. While an overly pushy suitor may not have listened to you, they would certainly listen to the Viscount Bridgerton. 

It was as if the universe were capable of reading your mind—the moment you thought of Anthony, your mother was leaning to whisper in your ear. 

“The Viscount and Lady Bridgerton are coming this way,” she murmured. “Please, do not act out in front of your future mother-in-law.” 

“Mother-in-law—!” you began to protest, but you were unable to get any more out as a wide smile took over your mother’s features, and she jabbed you lightly with her shoulder to force your posture to straighten. 

“Lady Bridgerton!” she exclaimed as they stopped in front of the two of you—Anthony bowed as a courtesy, and it was an effort to hide your amusement. “Viscount Bridgerton! How wonderful it is to see the two of you. Violet, you look just as lovely as ever.” 

“You are too kind,” Violet said with a smile. “It is just as good to see you as well, Cecilia. And my dear,” she looked to you, “you are a sure sight to see! I can hardly believe you’ve debuted—it seemed only yesterday you and Eloise were playing together in the drawing room.” 

You smiled at the memory. Conversation with the Bridgertons had always been pleasant—your ruse did not need to change that. “Thank you, Lady Bridgerton. I admit that I certainly miss those days, before all the responsibilities of a debut. Though I cannot say that my visits with Eloise will cease anytime soon.” 

“And I do not expect them to—we enjoy your company far too much.” Violet then chuckled. “I allowed her to stay at home with the promise that she practice the pianoforte during the evening. Tell me, do I have a chance at all of her listening to my request, or will I return to the estate to see her reading in the same position I left her?” 

You grinned. “I am certain you know the answer to that, Lady Bridgerton.” 

“Oh, please,” she brushed off your words with a wave of her hand, “there is no need for titles. Violet will be just fine—you are to be a part of our family soon anyway, if what I hear from my son is true.” 

Anthony’s eyes widened, his cheeks flushing red. How amusing that a simple sentence could revert him back to a blushing young man. “Mother!” 

Of course, you could not poke fun at the viscount in any way—you were sure you looked similar, what with the way you felt the heat rush to your cheeks and your eyes widen as well. Your words came out in a stammer: “I— well, I—” 

“Oh, you needn’t be so coy,” your mother teased. “A gentleman would certainly be nervous around the lady he is courting, especially one so beautiful as my daughter.” 

Anthony cleared his throat as he offered you a smile of his own, trying his best to recover from the embarrassment. “Yes, Miss Worthing. You are the image of perfection tonight in that shade of pink.” 

You could not even imagine putting up with these compliments for the rest of the season—it was far better than dealing with real advances from real suitors, of course, but you did not know if you would be able to stifle your laughter every time Anthony had to flirt with you in the presence of your mothers. 

“Thank you, my lord.” You bowed your head slightly in place of a curtsy. “You look quite… spiffing yourself.” 

The way Anthony was barely able to hide the mirth in his expression, you knew he was amused by your choice of words. If he made fun of you for it, you would blame it on your mothers. Your act did have to be convincing. 

You were just able to catch Violet’s pointed glance at her son before Anthony stepped forward and offered his hand. “I’d be honored to have your first dance of the night, my lady, if you would so indulge me.”

You did not have to look at your mother to know she was doing the same to you—you decided to save her the pain as you offered a practiced smile and took Anthony’s hand. “It would be a pleasure, my lord.” 

You entered the dance floor at the perfect time, just when the musicians were beginning a new song, and you took your place across from Anthony. You did not even need to ask what was on his mind as you began your side of the dance, the mirth in his expression telling you all you needed to know.  

“I’m not talking because I am focusing on my steps,” you muttered. “I am not as skilled at dancing as I am at many other things.” 

His lips quirked up at the edges. “So you mean to say you are better at irritating me than dancing with me?” 

The laugh that bubbled out of you caused you to miss one of your steps, but luckily it was at the exact moment you joined hands—Anthony covered for you with ease as you stumbled into him, a glaring reminder of just how much he knew in comparison to you as a result of his title and position.

“Thank you,” you said. “I suppose I am not capable of multitasking while on the dance floor.” 

Anthony hummed. “I can tell by the deathly grip you have on my hands.”  

You loosened your hold on Anthony as you continued to dance, offering an apologetic smile. “I apologize. This waltz is not my favorite, nor is it my forte. Most dances, truthfully, are not my forte.” 

“I am more surprised by the fact you have a favorite dance,” Anthony said, his own smile slightly cockeyed. “Though I should think more of our appearances together should be on the dance floor—you are much less mouthy. I already feel more confident without your constant insults.” 

You huffed a laugh. “That is because this is nowhere close to my environment. I am comfortable surrounded by books, or arguing with irritating viscounts. I am not comfortable dancing in front of a crowd this large with the man they all think I am to marry.” 

“Ah,” Anthony chuckled. “It is strange, isn’t it? That everyone thinks we will end the season as happily married, and though we are lying to each and every member of the ton, not a single one knows it.”

“Indeed. I truly do not know how you have handled the attention all these years, as a viscount and a Bridgerton. I have been associated with you for hardly a week and I am already tired of it all. If it were not for an even less desirable fate awaiting me without your status protecting me, I would have surely run off to the country by now. Perhaps not even the country—an entirely new country sounds marvelous.” 

Anthony raised his eyebrows. “Those are certainly not words befitting a future viscountess. Running away from responsibility is something more suited to a second child—perhaps you should’ve taken this journey with Benedict instead.” 

You gave him a sideways smile. “My words do not have to be those of a future viscountess, not when it is just you and me. I suppose that is a benefit of this arrangement.” You tilted your head to the side slightly. “I do think I would enjoy Benedict’s company better, though. He is a joy to be around, and I just love hearing about his artistic endeavors.” 

His lips quirked up. “You may indeed be a better pair, then—he certainly needs someone that will listen to him talk about his latest works without complaint, and he irritates me just as much as you do.” 

“Impossible,” you stated. “No one can irritate you as much as I do.” 

“And for taking the burden of that role, I am eternally grateful,” Anthony said with mock austerity. 

“Of course,” you nodded. “Know that I am truly here for you.” 

Anthony could not help but laugh at that, and you smiled inwardly as the dance ended and the two of you bowed to each other. 

“That was rather pleasant,” he said, “was it not?” 

“I’ve yet to experience a better one,” you said, and Anthony simply smiled. 

“I await the day when you no longer use sarcasm in our every conversation.” 

“You will be waiting a very long time, then, my lord.” 

You looped your arm around Anthony’s, a gesture that was already becoming familiar, and began to walk off the floor together. 

“I do hope my mother will get over the allure of our pairing soon, though,” you said. “She brings you up in nearly every conversation—our parting argument will have to be convincing indeed, otherwise I fear we may entirely break her heart.” 

Anthony chuckled. “I will certainly do my best to prevent that. Though I understand part of your plight. My siblings have not stopped bothering me since they got their hands on the latest edition of Whistledown. Eloise in particular is not a fan of us together.” 

“Eloise,” you muttered. “I completely forgot to tell her of our plan.” 

He raised his eyebrows. “You were going to tell her a secret that could ruin the both of us?” 

“Oh, please,” you admonished. “We both know it would only ruin me. Besides—Eloise already knows nearly everything about me; news of a true courtship between us would be far more shocking to her than this ruse of ours.”

“You are correct,” Anthony said with a slight laugh. “She cornered me in my office when I returned after our promenade the other day and practically demanded I explain myself — but rest assured, she is informed of the truth and is sworn to secrecy.” 

You smiled. “That sounds like her, alright. I did not expect her to reveal it in the first place, but it is good to know I have a confidante. In case I need to complain of you, of course.” 

“Oh,” Anthony nodded. “Of course. I shall go to her as well if I am in need of the same. She will most certainly not get annoyed at either of us.” 

You laughed. “I fear that if we resort to her as our sole alleviant she will most certainly reveal our secret.” 

“Eloise doing something out of pure annoyance? I do not doubt it.” 

You snickered at that, but then Anthony lightly touched your shoulder and gestured with his head towards the other side of the ballroom. 

“I should let you go,” Anthony said. “I believe your mother has some things she wishes to say to you.” 

You sighed. “I can only imagine just what she has to say. But it looks as if your mother has the same thing in mind.” 

He looked over and sighed, though it was not without a slight smile. “Then I shall see you tomorrow?” he asked. 

“Tomorrow?” You pretended to think over it. “That seems far too soon, my lord. I am in need of my rest, both to handle you and maintain this image.” 

“I suppose I am in need of a break as well,” Anthony said, “as I have to handle you just as much as you I.” 

“We are certainly a troublesome couple,” you said with mock austerity. “It would be no surprise if our courtship were to dissolve completely just before the end of the season.” 

Anthony nodded seriously. “It would not be a surprise at all. It would be for the best, truly.” 

“The best,” you agreed. 

The two of you shared smiles, the sort that only those with secrets could indulge in, and then you parted ways to your respective matriarchs. 

And as you walked back over to your mother, your head held higher than usual and an unmistakable confidence in your step, Anthony could not tear his eyes away—could not help but smile. 

“Dare I say this is the most I’ve seen you smile at a ball?”

Anthony turned to see Benedict approaching, a glass of wine that was far too full clutched in one hand. By the dazed grin on his lips and a look in his eye that showed he wasn’t all the way there, it wasn’t too hard to tell that his younger brother was already quite far gone—that must’ve been why he showed up on his own, rather than leaving with him and their mother. Certainly for the best, as Violet did not exactly need to see her son getting drunk. 

“Dare I say this is the earliest I’ve seen you drink at a ball?” Anthony answered in turn. 

“Of course it’s not—I’ve indulged even before arriving on certain occasions. It was the only way I was able to get through half of Daphne’s season.” Benedict’s eyes twinkled as he took a sip from his glass. “It made it far more enjoyable. I would suggest that you try it sometime, but it seems that you are already enjoying the night quite a bit.” 

Anthony glanced behind him to see you talking with your mother—or rather, her talking to you, he noted with a slight smile—before looking back at his brother. “I suppose I am having a rather decent time.” 

“Far more than decent,” Benedict insisted. “I would even go as far as to say that you actually like Miss Worthing’s company.” 

Anthony chuckled a bit. His acting must have been good, to fool even his brother. Though, to be fair, Benedict would not expect him to do something of this sort—honestly, this was more in his territory. Perhaps he was not wrong about telling you his brother would be a better option. 

He felt a strange twist in his chest at the thought, but pushed it away just as quickly. 

“She is a lovely lady,” he agreed, “and she will make a fine wife.”

Benedict laughed. “Coming from you, brother, that is a declaration of love. My most sincere congratulations to you—you deserve this more than anyone.” 

Anthony offered a small smile as his brother patted him on the shoulder and began to walk off, and he called after him: “Do not do anything too stupid, Ben!” 

He held up his wine glass in response, not turning to look back at him, and Anthony just shook his head, though not without mirth. 

His brother was right about one thing, though. You were the reason he did not have such a terrible night. 

-

“Hyacinth, stop teasing your brother. Benedict, straighten your cravat. And Colin, dear, please do not bore the Worthings with talk of your travels. They have heard them a thousand times, and a good image is imperative.” 

“Mother,” Colin said with a frown, “you always say you enjoy my stories.” 

“And I do, each and every time,” Violet said with a motherly smile, “but now is not the time to tell them of your exploits for the hundredth time.” 

“But we are already good friends with the Worthings,” Gregory said, “and we have had dinner with them so many times. Why do we need to make a good impression?” 

“Because this dinner is the most important,” Violet said. “Anthony is courting Y/N, and though it should move ahead very smoothly, we need to ensure that you all make a good impression. We will be one family soon enough.” 

“Y/N is to be our sister?” Hyacinth exclaimed. “Oh, that is so amazing! I read it in Lady Whistledown, but I am overjoyed it is actually true!”

Eloise rolled her eyes. “I still cannot believe this is happening. My brother courting my best friend—a true nightmare, perhaps.” 

“Eloise,” Violet admonished, “this is a good thing. Be happy for your brother, at least when you are around him.” 

She then looked around the room and sighed. “Where is Anthony, anyways?” 

“He went to fetch the Worthings,” Benedict supplied. “To ensure that things would go smoothly from the start, show off his effortless gentleman act, and charm her parents all over again—everything of his usual sort.” 

“And likely to do things in private with his bride-to-be,” Colin said, earning a snort from Benedict and a glare from his mother. 

“Colin Bridgerton, do not say things like that. Especially in front of your siblings.” 

“My apologies,” he said, holding his hands up in defense, though he could not help but crack a smile, “but it is likely true.” 

It was then that the door was opened by one of the servants—your parents walked through and you and Anthony followed behind them, both you and your mother holding onto your respective beau’s arms. 

“Oh, good!” Violet exclaimed, and she gave her children one last gesture with her head to silently ensure they would behave. “You’re just in time—Cecilia, Philip, it is so good to see the two of you. And Y/N, you look lovely tonight. Your dress is simply sublime.”

“You are far too kind,” you said with a smile, bowing your head in lieu of a curtsy. 

“It’s just as good to see you, Violet,” your mother said. 

Your father nodded. “We were honored to receive the invitation. It has been far too long since the Worthings and Bridgertons dined together.” 

“It certainly has,” Violet agreed. “I’m sure we are all hoping it will become a more frequent affair.” 

You could not return Anthony’s knowing gaze as he led you around the table, pulling out your chair for you before he took his seat next to you. Your parents took their own seats next to Violet’s head of the table, and you busied yourself adjusting the edge of the tablecloth, unable to even look at Anthony beside you. 

“I apologize, Mother, for the delay,” he said. “Our conversation ended up lasting longer than I expected.” 

Violet smiled and brushed it aside. “Think nothing of it, dear. You are right on time.” 

Anthony spoke the truth, though it was wholly simplified—you could not even look him in the eye after all your mother had said. You did not ever plan on him knowing so many details of your childhood, but you ended up not having a choice in the matter. 

He had come to charm your parents and escort the three of you to his estate—it was overboard for a normal suitor, but not for one that was purposefully trying to annoy you as well as completely earn the favor of your family. And it was certainly not overboard for a Bridgerton. 

When Anthony arrived, his plan was to meet your parents, converse for a bit to get them fully on his side, and then your mother would fetch you and they would all be on their way. Instead, the moment he listened to your mother and sat down with her in the drawing room, she launched into an entire spiel, solely of you. Honestly, you were thankful you weren’t there, as you do not think you could have handled the embarrassment. Anthony, though, enjoyed it far more than he should have. He also had far more ammunition than he deserved, some of which he had already used against you in whispered conversations on the way here.

(You had already made a plan to get back at him, of course. The next time you were with Eloise in private, you were going to ask her for every single piece of information about her brother, even the most undignified shred. You were certain she would go along with it, and happily so.) 

“Are you really going to marry our brother?” Gregory suddenly asked, and along with your eyes widening you felt the heat rush to your cheeks. You thought you were getting used to the idea of this whole thing, but as of now, it seemed you were doomed to the embarrassment each time someone brought up the marriage aspect. 

“Not just marry our brother, Gregory,” Hyacinth said, “she will be our sister!” Her attention turned to you, all bright energy, and you could not help but smile the slightest bit. “I cannot wait, Y/N, truly! You must teach me to play the violin once you’re wed, please.” 

“Sister-in-law,” Anthony corrected hastily, and you noticed his throat bobbing after a quick glance at you, “she will be your sister-in-law. And she will have other matters to attend to over teaching you to play instruments—if you wish to learn violin, I’m sure we can get you a teacher.” 

“Do not be like that, Anthony,” Violet admonished, and she smiled at her daughter. “I’m sure that there will be plenty of time for you to learn things with Miss Worthing. That is,” she glanced over at you, “if she is alright with that.” 

“Of course,” you nodded immediately. “I do not think myself the best teacher, but I would love to help you wherever I could. And please,” you smiled, “if I am to call you Violet, you must call me Y/N. Formalities are certainly not needed there.” 

“What instruments do you know, Y/N?” Colin spoke up. 

“I am most skilled at the violin,” you said, and when you looked at your mother she smiled, “but it is only through countless hours of work. Mother can tell you just how much of a disaster I was at the beginning.” 

“Oh, do not say that,” your mother said, brushing it off with an offhanded gesture. “No one is an expert at the beginning—I dare say you picked it up quite fast. Is that not right, Philip?”

“Hm?” Your father’s attention was brought back by your mother saying his name, and he blinked a couple times before he looked at you. “Ah, yes. Yes, she did. Our daughter is very talented.” 

You stifled a laugh at that. Whereas your mother was involved in your life at every twist and turn, your father was more focused on the family finances and keeping the Worthings afloat. It was an important job and you were ever grateful for it, but it left him with neither time nor energy to focus on much else. 

(You also did not think he cared much for high society anyway—he wanted you to marry in order to secure your lineage as well as garner the protection that a good marriage would bring you, which explained his offer to Lord Cardew, but otherwise, he was hardly involved.) 

“What else?” Gregory asked.

“Other than violin, I also know how to play the pianoforte quite well,” you said. “Beyond that is the cello and the viola, though my viola skills certainly need work.” 

“Amazing,” Hyacinth breathed, and she looked at Violet. “Mother, you must let me learn more instruments! I'm growing a bit tired of the pianoforte."

“Because the pianoforte is boring,” Eloise contributed. “After listening to Daphne play it nonstop all those years trying to perfect it while she prepared for her debut, I can hardly stand the sound of it anymore.” 

“Are you saying you do not wish to bear audience to my impromptu concerts anymore?” you asked, your scandalized tone a mockery. 

“I am afraid so,” Eloise said, her austere words a joke as well. “I can no longer handle the noise of those wretched keys—it makes me want to plunge my knitting needles into my eyes.” 

“Eloise!” Violet interrupted. “Do not say things like that!” 

“Apologies, Mother,” she said, but the secret smile the two of you shared was hardly enough to stifle your combined laughter. 

Benedict set down his wine glass and looked at you. “I must ask,” he said, and his slight smile set you at ease, “how have you and our dearest Anthony been getting along? You must be doing something right, as I can certainly attest that he has become more pleasant to be around since he began courting you. I must thank you for that, of course.” 

Your smile grew as you looked over at Anthony next to you, and though he was trying to hide any sign of emotion behind the brim of his glass, you could tell that he was not as unaffected as he wanted you to believe. “Is that true?” you asked. 

“Oh, certainly,” Colin spoke up. “The other day, we were having a family picnic in the park—Eloise stole a biscuit from him, and he did not even get annoyed. I believe it was the day after your dance at the Kennington’s ball. There has to be a connection there, right?” 

“He was in a good mood there!” Benedict agreed, and he looked at you again. “Oh, after you separated, Anthony could not stop smiling. Y/N, I think he has smiled more than ever in the weeks he has been courting you.” 

“Well,” you said, smiling yourself as you turned to Anthony, “I am glad to have been a source of happiness for you as of late.” 

“Yes,” Anthony said, and he smiled as well. He looked to be doubling down in this, determined to not let you win in your little game. It was a shame, truly. “I am very thankful for your presence, Y/N; I’ve thoroughly enjoyed every moment together. You’ve been a—no, the light of my life. I’m not a poet in any sense of the word, so forgive me for being blunt, but I cannot wait to marry you.” 

“Colin,” Eloise said, speaking up suddenly, and you were thankful for it as it took all of your strength to tamp down on your laughter, “weren’t you telling me earlier about how beautiful the mountains were during your visit to Greece?” 

“Oh, they are amazing,” Colin said, and you could hear Violet sigh as a waterfall of information began to pour out of him. You assumed Eloise wanted just as much, as she gave you a very pointed look from across the table. You just smiled at her. 

You looked at Anthony next to you as the conversation carried on without you, mouthing “very nice” with serious eyes. He responded by rolling his own, though unable to fully conceal his smile. 

Friends, you surmised. It appeared the two of you were actually becoming friends. 

-

“The light of your life?” you exclaimed, raucous laughter emerging after it. “Oh, Anthony—you are certainly becoming creative.” 

He let out a small laugh as well, shaking his head some. “Can you blame me? Benedict and Colin seemed intent on embarrassing us completely, in front of your parents as well! I had no choice but to either give in to their teasing or double down on our love. And of course, I could not let my brothers get the better of us.” 

The two of you had escaped to the outdoors once your dinner together was over—your parents had to retire for the night, your father claiming he had important business matters to attend to early the next morning and your mother citing plain old exhaustion. You requested a promenade with Anthony, purely so you could discuss everything that had gone on between the two of you, and they agreed with the promise that Anthony accompany you on the carriage ride home. You were meant to have a chaperone as well, but either by accident or purpose you ended up alone. Now, you walked throughout the greenery of the Bridgerton estate, barely able to get through your words without laughter alongside it. 

“Of course,” you said sagely, “it was certainly a strategic move, complimenting me so. I don’t know what to do with myself, knowing that you actually don’t hate me.” 

“I should be the one with that reaction,” Anthony said. “Whatever am I to do without your endless jabs at me? I may actually gain some confidence.” 

“Oh,” you shook your head, “do not worry, my lord. I will always be able to humble you, even after we are married. It is one of my many talents; surely, you are aware.” 

“Certainly so,” he said, but then he sighed. “The longer we go on with this, though, the more guilt I feel. The advantage of not having to deal with countless daughters is quite nice, and I’m thankful you get to avoid that lecher of a man. But,” Anthony shook his head, “seeing how my siblings reacted, I cannot help but feel bad for them.” 

You bit your lip and nodded. “Hyacinth was overjoyed about it. The excitement in her eyes when she talked about my becoming her sister, and learning the violin…” You chuckled. “It is almost enough to make me want to go through with this in reality.” 

“I know how you feel,” Anthony said dryly. “A marriage borne out of Hyacinth-induced guilt is certainly not out of her power.” 

“Can you imagine when the reverend asks us for our vows?” you laughed as you straightened your posture and grabbed his hands, exaggerating your voice. “Anthony Bridgerton, I do not love you, but I do love your sister. I could not stand to see the sadness in her eyes if we do not go through with this, therefore I will marry you.” 

He laughed again at that, and he squeezed your hands before he pulled away. “Be careful with what you say, my lady. You may not know this as an only child, but the magic that a younger sister holds is a mysterious one indeed. She has gotten her way many a time in this family purely by doing just that.” 

“I do not doubt it,” you nodded. It was then that the two of you walked past a pair of swings, hung by ropes tied to a tree. You tugged at one of the ropes and looked at Anthony. “What are these here for?” 

He smiled a bit. “My father and I built them together when I was younger—I couldn’t have been any more than ten. He had the idea to make them for us—not just me and the three other siblings that were there, but the future children that they planned to have. My father decided to make it himself rather than outsource the work to a carpenter or a servant, and I begged him to let me help. He let me, and even though all I did was walk around rope and tie knots, I had the most brilliant time.” 

Anthony walked over and picked up a knot, one tied in the middle of the rope. “This is the first one I made. It’s completely useless, and honestly, it would have been better if Father just took it out, but he kept it there; he just worked around it when he had to string it all up. It looks like nothing—truthfully, it looks like a mistake, but it’s… it’s a priceless reminder of him. I’m thankful he left it.” 

“That’s beautiful, Anthony,” you murmured. A moment of hesitation passed before you slowly reached out and, before you could doubt yourself, placed your hand over his as gently as you could. There was a moment of surprise, visible from the slightest flinch to his widened eyes as he looked at you, but it faded just as quickly, replaced by a feeling you couldn’t describe. 

“It’s a part of him,” you said softly. “Proof of the time you spent together—proof that he was here, that he was with you, that he loved you. That he will always love you, even if he is no longer here. You are a part of that too, Anthony—do you realize? He lives on in you, in the way that you love and take care of your siblings.” 

Anthony swallowed thickly, his throat bobbing as he looked at you. His gaze was the softest thing you’d experienced, the warmth of his hand enveloping yours as he turned his over to squeeze your hand. It felt like the world around you had stopped as you looked into each other’s eyes, your breath hitching in your chest both at the feeling of his hand on yours and the proximity that had gotten closer without you even realizing. It must have struck Anthony suddenly, because his eyes widened slightly and he pulled away, taking a few steps in the opposite direction. 

The air returned to you as you put on your own distance, your eyes widening the same way as you realized what had just happened. 

What had just happened? 

“It is getting late,” he said hastily, “we should get you back to your estate.” 

“Of course,” you agreed, nodding far too many times. “My mother is likely worried.” 

“Of course,” he repeated, and Anthony cleared his throat before he looked at you. “I will send for a maid to accompany you when we get back to the house instead. We should—” he cleared his throat again, “I have things I need to attend to, unfortunately. Finances to go through, papers to sign.” 

You nodded yet again. “That is for the best. That— that is smart.” 

This time, it was his turn to nod. “Yes, of course.” 

The silence hung in the air between the two of you for one long, charged moment, before you spoke. 

“We should go.” 

“Yes!” Anthony said, and before you turned to start walking you were able to see his frown, his thoroughly vexed expression. You felt the exact same way. 

And as you walked back to the Bridgerton estate, the space naturally occurring between the two of you despite the strange atmosphere that had been created, the thought once again popped into your mind. 

What had just happened? 

-

sorry for tagging again but thats the way it is. i hope this works lol

perm tags: @dv0412 @siriuslyslyslytherin @maruchan77 @simonsbluee @kwyloz @masteroperator 

bridgerton tags: @theonewithallthemilkshakes @rach2602 @milkiane @korol-lantsov

anthony bridgerton tags: @gwenebear @lurkymurker @likeballet

not so simple tags: @ifilwtmfc @readers-posts @fangirling-galore @funkydinosaurs @baby-i-am-fireproof @mess-is-my-aesthetic @likeballet @mdkfh @brezzybfan 

[shanie-the-toyaddict]

You know, maybe it's time people just called it a day and left.

And by that, I mean EVERYONE.

My faves, your faves, everyone.

Just LEAVE.

Sami, Kevin, Cesaro, Adam Cole, Elias, Baron, all of you. Just pack your shit and leave.

Bayley, Sasha, Bianca, Piper, Zelina, Naomi, all of my underappreciated ladies. Find a better home that appreciates you.

Shane, go back to Ideanomics and save yourself the hassle.

Hunter, go build your own empire elsewhere. You can start by building a roster out of all the highly talented people your father in law has thrown in the dumpster the past two years. Nail your Theses to the Performance Center door and take everyone with you.

This company is showing day after day that it doesn't give two squirts of piss about any of you, it caters to an audience of one and you don't matter. NONE OF YOU DO.

Leave the WWE and leave Vince behind.

There's enough talent all around that;s involved here that you could build your own shit from scratch if you found the right backers.

I'm sick of watching Vince burn his company to the ground at the expense of everyone who helped built it for him.

Just LEAVE.

ALL OF YOU.

[the---hermit]

27|02|2023

Yesterday I spent most of my day reading and it was great. Today didn't start as planned tho. It has snowed from yesterday afternoon to today's late morning, and I was so afraid the bus would cause problems (because they do when the weather is fine, so snow for them is a big deal) I skipped class. I decided to avoid commuting for a two hour lecture and the risk of being stuck in the city. I still woke up at 4:45, because of course it was a last minute decision, so I didn't even get the real benefits of skipping class. I did get some studying done of course. As for how I am feeling, it's definitely slowly going better, I am still not at my best, but I want to be grateful of all small emprovements. At the end of the week I will have my monthly therapy session, and I am very much looking forward to that. On a completly different topic I have almost filled it the journal I am currently using for daily entries, which is making me really excited, because it means I will get to buy new notebook! I am doing my best to stay excited for small things, so here it is a small thing that I look forward to. I might go on the hunt for it tomorrow, I don't know yet, and I don't know yet what type of notebook I am looking for, I think I'll just get the one that calls to me the most.

Productivity:

Posted this updated of the 2023 genre bingo

Did a bit of planning of uni materials I have to study for the classes I am taking at the moment (I just wrote everything down on my bullet journal so I can see everything all at once and break it into smaller steps, this way I have an overview of what I have to do and what I have done already)

Started reading and annotating the second set of protohistory notes provided by the professor (for some reason I am working very slowly on them, I don't know if it's me still being quite tired or just the process of working on those specific notes)

Started reading and annotating the first book I have to study for my history of libraries and reading class

Practiced Irish on duolingo

Continued reading Harrow The Ninth (my brain is melted by this book, I am stuggling to put it down when I read it because I need to know more)

Self care:

Read in the morning

Drank lots of water, and probably even more tea

Journaled

Face scrub

📖: Harrow The Ninth by Tamsyn Muir, How We Read Now by Naomi S. Baron

[writinglionqueen]

SmackDown Recap (12/17/21)

~kicking things off with Sasha Banks and Toni Storm vs Shotzi and Charlotte Flair

~Toni pins Charlotte

~Viking Raiders vs Jinder Mahal and Shanky

~Vikind Raiders win

~Happy Talk with Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss with their guest, Drew’s sword

~They make fun of Drew McIntyre before they try to pull Drew’s sword from the desk

~Drew interrupt

~Ridge Holland vs Cesaro

~Ridge Holland wins

~Naomi wants her chance again at Sonya Devill

~Sonya says no, that she can face Sonya Baszler who blindsides Naomi before Sonya has rhe ref ring the bell

~Naomi gets a win

~Baron throws Madcap to Drew next week

~The New Day vs the Usos

~Kofi wins

~Roman Reigns is back

~Roman asks Paul Heyman questions

~Roman wants to know if Paul is protecting Brock from him

~Paul says he is protecting Roman from Brock

~Roman fires Brock before delivering a Superman Punch to him

~As Roman is setting Heyman between two chairs, Brock Lesnar interrupts

~Brock bulldozes through the Usos

~Roman attacks Brock with the chair in his hands but Lesnar delivers 2 F5’s to Roman

[dear-indies]

hey y'all! just wondering, do you have any face claims suggestions similar to the singer alexis krauss? i'm going for a 80's glam metal vibe and i feel like she fits perfectly but there's not many resources for her unfortunately </3 thanks!

Pauley Perrette (1969) - asexual.

Katherine Moennig (1977) - lesbian.

Krysten Ritter (1981)

Alison Brie (1982) - her role in GLOW.

Levy Tran (1983) Vietnamese.

Mon Laferte (1983) Chilean.

Lights Poxleitner-Bokan (1984)

Jaimie Alexander (1984) - her role in Blindspot.

Maika Harper (1984) Inuit.

Ryan Ashley Malarkey (1987)

Daniella Pineda (1987) Mexican.

Naomi Watanabe (1987) Japanese / Taiwanese.

Ksenia Solo (1986) - her role in Lost Girl.

Taylor Lashae (1988) Colombian and French.

Nadia Hilker (1988) Tunisian / German - her role in The Walking Dead.

Tania Raymonde (1988) Ashkenazi Jewish / Corsican Italian.

Mae Whitman (1988) her role in Jack - pansexual.

Úrsula Corberó (1989)

Billie Lourd (1992) 1/4 Ashkenazi Jewish 3/4 English, Scottish, Scots-Irish/Northern Irish, Welsh, German, Cajun/French - her role in AHS: 1984.

Lina Ahn (1994) Korean.

Britt Baron (?) African-American - her role in GLOW.

Natasia Demetriou (?)

also!

Asia Kate Dillon (1984) - non-binary and pansexual - they/them.

All of these people have resources at the time of posting too!

[thecomedybureau]

The 100 Best Things in Comedy We Were Witness to In No Particular Order of 2019

OK, 2019′s officially over and we’ve wrangled our 100 truly favorite things in and around comedy (and it really spans all of comedy) that are not ranked whatsoever. It’s just like the title says and, it’s, as it is every year, quite long, so we won’t waste any more time with this intro. 

Oh, in case you forgot and/or curious and/or need a quick refresher, here’s our 2018 list. 

1. Rory Scovel Live Without Fear-This documentary follows Rory Scovel and his journey through six nights of completely improvised hour sets. In a single word, it’s inspiring. You see the way Scovel truly connects the audience and keeps it that way through his indelible charm and endless curiosity. The near unbelievable story of the Relapse Theater in Atlanta is also beautifully threaded in the doc as well. The clips of the improvised performances capture the magic that stand-up comedy can be that’s absent from the majority of comedy specials. You should be required to see this whenever and wherever it comes if you have any level of interest in comedy at all. 

2. Naomi Ekperigin-From her own stand-up, to her podcast with husband Andy Beckerman, Couples Therapy, and her writing across TV, and everything else she does, Naomi is such an thoroughly commanding, yet delightful presence that we love seeing every time anywhere (and she should already be way bigger of a star already).

3. Cait Raft’s Presentation on “Bradley Cooper’s a Star Is Born Takes Place in an Alternate Reality Where 9/11 Never Happened”-Witnessing the imagination of Cait Raft up close was a privilege for us. This amazing dissection of the zeitgeist left us in stitches and with our mouth agape for how thoroughly it proved its point.

4. Corporate Season 2-The second season of the ultra dark workplace comedy delivered once again on its hysterical nihilistic satire that’s so prescient, yet still so unbelievably funny.

5. Mom-Prov Presents Family Therapy-Improviser Izzy Roland was daring enough to have her mom and her grandmother, both of whom are also in showbiz, to join her on stage for one of the most madcap, fourth wall-breaking, entertaining improv shows we’ve seen all throughout 2019.

6. Jena Friedman-So, this year, Jena delivered yet again with her subtle delivery and calm demeanor that hides her absolutely killer jokes. The follow-up to her Adult Swim special, Soft Focus, upped the ante with an interview of a gun-toting John McAffee and her brilliant Conan set about everyone’s true crime obsession.

7. Brendon Walsh’s Afternoon Delight-This last year, Brendon Walsh let everyone know that he was and still is one of the best at pulling prank calls, which is so much harder now than it was even ten years ago. This live show actually has Brendon place live prank calls in between stand-ups and the ride you go on is absolutely thrilling.

8. Jacqueline Novak’s Get on Your Knees-Novak’s solo show has more than earned its spot as an Off-Broadway show with bringing such an exquisite, almost never before seen comedic sensibility to the topic of blow jobs.

9. #F*ckF*ckJerry-Props to Vulture Senior Editor Megh Wright for sparking the fire to take out the egregious social media accounts of F*ck Jerry that just lifted jokes from comedians all across the Internet without pay or attribution.

10. Lorelei Ramirez-We’ve known distantly about Lorelei Ramirez for so many years, but seeing them up close was a breathtaking experience that had us laughing so hard. Their artistry in comedy that gracefully borders on performance art and even horror is absolutely inspiring.

11. Aaron Urist-Denver’s Aaron Urist is such a killer joke writer and joke teller and has been for years. We just were reminded about that with his burning bush joke during his latest LA trip.

12. Booksmart-Olivia Wilde’s directorial debut was not only a reinvigorated take on movies that specifically hone in on the end of high school, but also had a sincerely hopeful vision of the future generation. We hope that Booksmart finds its way to the top of the coming-of-age comedy films pantheon.

13. Rachel Mac on Lights Out-One of the highlights of Lights Out with David Spade is how unfiltered and raunchy they let comics get during their sets on the show. Rachel Mac took that amount of comedic license and thrived in getting into the nitty gritty about her last teaching job.

14. What We Do In The Shadows-The FX TV adaptation of the seminal Taika Waititi and Jemaine Clement film in 2014 exceedingly succeeds in nailing the comedy of minutia in the world of the undead that also happens to be in a (somewhat) grounded reality.

15. PEN15-Maya Erskine and Anna Konkle’s vision of 2000 and their performances as teens were so spot on that PEN15 would deserve acclaim just for that. However, the heart of this show made its humor stand out in an ever crowded field of coming-of-age comedy.

16. Tiffany Haddish’s Black Mitzvah-A lot has happened for Tiffany Haddish since her last special (she’s a legit A-list celebrity now), but it’s clear that she is still her unapologetically positively, life loving self. This special is evidence of that, especially with her bit about her New Year’s show that she got undeserved flack for.

17. Straw Men-Lindsay Adams, Danny Palumbo, and Sam Wiles (and producer Kimmie Lucas) put on what is our favorite imagining of a comedic debate that we’ve seen thus far. The encouragement to make the most ridiculous, baseless arguments and being transparent about the whole thing is a golden goose of comedy.

18. The ending of Gloria Bell-Well, we can’t very well give away the ending to this English language dramedy remake from Sebastián Lelio that has Julianne Moore shine as bright as she has ever shone before, but just know that we stood out of our seats, applauding what she did to John Turturro right at the end.

19. I Think You Should Leave-Tim Robinson’s unflinchingly absurd sketch series unequivocally has many of the best sketches of 2019. The hot dog costume and Mexican restaurant sketches will have us busting up through, very likely, the next decade.

20. Les Miz and Friends-Bonkers (and we mean that in the best way possible) doesn’t begin to describe how wild this meta and great this puppet and human hybrid take on the theater institution of Les Miserables. The sheer cleverness on every level is awe-inspiring. 

21. Dave Ross’ The Only Man Who Has Ever Had Sex-Ross has been a longtime favorite of ours for the contrasting bounciness and darkness of his comedy. His debut album captures this dichotomy perfectly.

22. Nikki Glaser: Bangin’-Nikki Glaser’s first Netflix hour special started off with a bang, pun intended. Her frank, but heartfelt exploration of all facets of sex is so damn funny that Glaser gets away with being as blue as she wants.  

23. Super Dating Simulator-This live, interactive version of various Japanese video game dating simulators is one of the more innovative and surprisingly charming things we saw this year. Creator Sam Weller did a bang-up job not only making a video game work as a stage show, but doing so with a very off-beat sub-genre of video games

24. Emmy Blotnick’s Party Nights-Blotnick’s latest album shows Emmy at the peak of her delightful observational powers. The concept of a “Self-Potato” is just priceless.

25. Tammercise!-Folks in comedy are getting all sorts of clever these days to redefine traditional formats and disciplines and push the art form forward. Madeline Wager does this exquisitely with a solo show of a woman unraveling that doubles as legit aerobics class.

26. The Cherry Orchard w/Chad Damiani and Jet Eveleth-Damiani and Eveleth explore a new angle on postmodern clowning by supposedly doing a Chekov play going through dress rehearsal without any of the players knowing what they’re supposed to do. The back and forth between the live direction and the tomfoolery on stage is truly hysterical.

27. Bake Stuff with Lindsay LIVE-It’s about time for a comedic cooking show that actually does teach you a wonderful recipe and also explores and resolves(?) childhood trauma. Lindsay Adams’ Bake Stuff with Lindsay, which we indeed saw live, accomplishes all of that and inspires all those watching to cook through their feelings.

28. Shalewa Sharpe’s So, You Just Out Here?-Shalewa imbues homespun wisdom with marvelously colorful descriptions all throughout this very satisfying album.

29. The Amazing Johnathan Documentary from Ben Berman-The Amazing Johnathan’s life story is pretty captivating as is. The story about Ben Berman trying to tell his story amidst several other people trying to tell his story is absolutely engrossing and is somehow all true.

30. Julio Torres’ HBO special “My Favorite Shapes”-Torres’ special is simultaneously one of the most daring and silly hour specials in recent memory and his elevation of prop comedy to a whole new level is to be commended.

31. The Underculture with James Adomian-James Adomian has been one of comedy podcasts’ most in-demand and bright shining stars. It comes as no surprise that his own podcast that revs up all his characters has some of the best, most dynamic, absurdist interviews in political and pop culture satire. 

32. Daniel Van Kirk’s Thanks Diane/Together Tour-Van Kirk’s first, complete hour that he both toured with and released as an album is so impressive with how deftly Dan manages a balance of sincerity and mischief from wire-to-wire.

33. Conan in Greenland-Conan marvelously turns his travel specials series Conan Without Borders on its head by attempting to buy Greenland based off of Trump’s stupid tweets.

34. Mary Beth Barone’s Drag His Ass: A F*ckboy Treatment Program-Mary Beth Barone’s live show exploration into her dating life is illuminating and hilarious throughout, but the actual interview that she does live with a “f*ckboy” is transcendent.

35. Obvious Plant’s Carnival of Toys-Jeff Wysaski AKA Obvious Plant really outdid himself this year in his quest to permeate everyday reality with a satirical twist. He not only made a whole line of custom toy figures that satirize pop culture on so many levels, but opened up a whole pop-up museum for several days to exhibit them in all of their bizarre glory.

36. Sports Without Equipment with Coach Keith Alejo-This Dress Up Gang sketch is one of those ideas that are simple, yet so out-of-left-field. Literally, they take sports without equipment to its funniest conclusion.

37. #Squatmelt-Howard Kremer’s desire to keep the spirit of The Meltdown with Jonah and Kumail alive has evolved into its own very special thing in the form of a DIY stand-up comedy show/walking tour that periodically migrates around LA.

38. Catch-22-Trying to adapt such a monumental literary work like Catch-22 is almost a fool’s errand, but writers Luke Davies and David Michôd do a smash-up job for not only bringing Heller’s immortal words to life, but also sticking the landing for all the darkly absurdly comical moments that run rampant throughout the story.

39. Get Rich Nick-Even if they didn’t have the fantastic banter, riffs, and asides from the very funny duo of Nick Turner and Nick Vatterott, this podcast that explores how to make money real quick is one of the best new podcasts of the whole year. Fortunately, Nick and Nick’s humor runs rampant through every episode and makes Get Rich Nick engrossing and makes you actually laugh out loud.

40. MK Paulsen-The comedy of MK Paulsen can be faster than a bullet, but as satisfyingly silly as a gun that shoots a flag with the word ‘bang’ on it. Every time we see him do stand-up, it’s a fun, rollicking ride that’s equal parts offbeat whimsy, clever wordplay, and an agile sense of timing and play.

41. Father Figurine by Matt Kazman-The dour faces of the family in this dark comedy short play to the highest comedic effect perfectly. A dead patriarch and an apathetic family make for some of the best dry humor in 2019.

42. Funk Shuffle-Danny Cymbal, Dennis Curlett, and Michael Gardner comprise Funk Shuffle, an improv group that manages fly freer and more untethered than almost any other improv group that we’ve ever seen. They make their defiance and experimentation with improv forms really work due to the trio’s unflinchingly playful spirit.

43. Gary Gulman’s The Great Depresh-Gulman, as one of comedy’s premier craftsman, of course, delivers an hour of stellar comedy with this special. He also manages, this time around, to destigmatize depression and, in general, be hopeful. That particular comedy trifecta is such an impressive feat that very few can accomplish.

44. Greener Grass-The scope and ambition of Jocelyn DeBoer and Dawn Luebbe’s directorial debut hints at some really special things to come from them in the future. Their absolutely demented, pastel drenched absurdist vision was a shocking delight through and through.

45. Jenny Slate’s Stage Fright-Slate’s best comedic strength is her unshakeable vulnerability. This hour special lets Jenny present that trait as intimately as she has ever presented it and gives an in-depth look as to where that hilarious vulnerability comes from. 

46. Heather Anne Campbell swatting a baby out of someone’s hands in an improv scene-At this point, it should come as no surprise that Heather Anne Campbell is one of our absolute all-time favorite people in comedy and thus, she kind of just ends up making it on this list annually on her own someway, somehow. This year, during a performance of her improv group, Heather and Company, we laughed as hard as we’ve ever laughed at Drew DiFonzo Marks initiating a scene by rocking a baby back and forth and then, Heather insanely swatted it out of his hands and stomped on it. It sounds ludicrous, but trust that Heather made that so unbelievably funny. 

47. Adam Cayton-Holland’s Happy Place-Cayton-Holland’s live solo show based on his critically acclaimed book of the same name pulls off oscillating between cleverly wrought and self-aware comedy and some of the most heartbreaking stories you’ll ever hear about his late sister. Holland’s focus and calm make it all miraculously blend together.

48. The Authorized Unauthorized My Favorite Murder Musical-In the world of unauthorized musicals about things that you wouldn’t really think about being adapted into unauthorized musicals (it’s a bigger ever-burgeoning world every month it seems), the staged reading of this My Favorite Murder-inspired musical that we saw was phenomenal. The full stage production to come in 2020 will undoubtedly be something really great. 

49. Pedro Gonzalez-Pedro’s jokes are so expertly written and crafted that you forget that he immigrated to America as a teenager from Colombia and learned English as a second language.

50. Garry Starr Performs Everything-UK comedian Garry Starr’s solo show is a genius send-up and celebration of theater as a whole. The physicality and the sheer madness of the whole show are so thoroughly hysterical.

51. Kira Soltanovich-We just want to take a moment to appreciate the agility of the comedy of Kira Soltanovich. Not only does Kira play any room or any show as far as we’ve seen, but her drive is just unstoppable (see ep. of The Honey Dew).

52. Mike Birbiglia’s The New One-Though it seems almost too routine that Birbiglia comes out with a new hour special that garners tons of acclaim for its ornate and complex and, ultimately, very satisfying tapestry of stories, Birbiglia delivers exactly once again with one such solo show/special on fatherhood.

53. Michelle Buteau-We saw Michelle headline just a few months ago at Dynasty Typewriter and were reminded of just how good Buteau is. She combines being heartfelt, having a fun bit of attitude, and an absolute command of the stage in such a beautiful way.

54. Gareth Reynolds’ Riddled with Disease-Many folks know how great Gareth is from his madcap riffing on The Dollop, but Reynolds shows he is fantastic with a sharp, hilarious, yet still fast-and-loose-feeling hour.

55. Sara Schaefer’s LIVE LAUGH LOVE-Sara, above most folks working in comedy today, goes to great lengths to be considerate, inclusive, and vulnerable in her comedy and it’s so, so wonderful because of that. This album is yet another great example of that mix.

56. Sean Patton’s Scuttlebutt-Sean Patton’s latest album is a fantastic note to any and all that Sean is, hands down, one of the best comedians ever to spin a yarn (and also share some damn fine true stories) and deserves way more accolade and attention for that now and going forward. 

57. Matt Rogers’ Have You Heard of Christmas?-Rogers had quite a 2019 in putting culture on notice, but his queer and subversive holiday musical extravaganza might be one of the best pieces of holiday themed comedy of all time.

58. The Chris Gethard Show with Robby Hoffman-Not only does Robby Hoffman keep the punk rock, conventions-be-damned spirit of TCGS alive, but she makes it so much her own and lets her hilarious, domineering persona transform the show into another very special, unique round of controlled chaos.

59. The taping of Eddie Pepitone’s latest special-Eddie’s sound and fury and his irreverent stream-of-consciousness-seeming comedy were flawless in this latest hour. Everyone in attendance, including ourselves, were in stitches for the whole taping. Props to director Steven Feinartz for one of our favorite looks of a special that we saw last year (which you’ll all get to see soon in 2020).

60. Eric Dadourian’s closer on Nebraska 2-Dadourian is always all in for the sake of a real bold, imaginative bit and, as such, pulled off one of our favorite closers of the year on his very first full length album.

61. Jessica Kirson: Talking to Myself-Kirson’s hour special on Comedy Central really let Jessica cut loose and let her showcase her stand-up expertise. From the way that Kirson contorts her face to her deep well of voices/characters to razor-sharp quick wit to, of course, her signature asides to herself, Jessica really kills it in this hour. 

62. Brody Stevens-Long live the “jock doing performance art” comedy (one of our favorite descriptions of Brody’s comedy by his dear friend Zach Galifianakis) and may he rest in peace. Yeeeees! Enjoy It!

63. Byron Bowers on Colbert-Byron Bowers and his clever, yet sincere, dark, vulnerable comedy put up one of our favorite late night sets this year. From the opening to his frank jokes about his dad make us think that it’s just a little crazy that this is his network TV debut.

64. Desus and Mero on Showtime-With the upgrade of being on Showtime, Desus Nice and The Kid Mero are having the most fun in late night with the freshest voices and format (and they’re able to pull that off with only being twice a week).

65. Fleabag Season 2-creator and star Phoebe Waller-Bridge assuredly has more masterpieces ahead of her, but managing to top herself from one masterpiece season of dark romantic dramedy with another one is something that deserves all the accolades and awards that it has gotten.

66. Kenny DeForest on Corden-Kenny dismantles toxic masculinity so incisively through the whole set that he most certainly earns all the applause breaks he gets the whole way through.

67. Josh Gondelman’s Dancing on a Weeknight-Gondelman is often thought of as one of the best, sweetest people in comedy. This latest album, for all of its being clever and genuine, is proof that he indeed really is that sweet and funny.

68. The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Season 3-The perennial prestige comedy from Amy Sherman-Palladino earns its keep by having some of the best writing (it’s almost impossible to write jokes that are contextualized for the 50s/60s and make them actually funny for 2019 audiences) and also being one of the most gorgeous looking shows in all of television.

69. Nick Ciarelli and Brad Evans-Whether it be pulling pranks on Twitter, their plethora of hysterical sketches doing an impression of Jack FM on shows around town, or their monthly live sketch character showcase Atlantic City, Nick and Brad are a damn fine comedy duo and have been for quite some time. 

70. Caitlin Gill’s Major-It’s quite the magic trick to make an hour of comedy that’s entirely clean and have it being clean not be a thought that you’re thinking about at all when listening or watching it. Caitlin Gill spectacularly does just that with this album as Gill can make all of her earnest rants, imagery, and observations work in any way that she needs to.  

71. 97.9 The Rat Race-Ben Roy’s satirical reimagining of a morning radio “zoo crew” is so spot on, then gets real twisted to make this one of the most surprising and rewarding podcasts of 2019.

72. Mike Lane’s Picture Frames-This short film from Lane heightens the idea of remembering those you love after they’ve left this mortal coil to such a ridiculous level every step of the way (and is more and more enjoyably unpredictable the further it goes).

73. Paige Weldon on Corden-Paige’s upbeat self-deprecation is just hard to resist and it makes the best impression in this late night set on The Late Late Show with James Corden.

74. The Righteous Gemstones-Danny McBride’s latest HBO series that darkly and comically dissects the South might be his most ambitious yet, but, of course, he nails it. The constant suspense perpetuated by hysterically tragic characters in the world of televangelists is profound.

75. My Friend Chuck-Comedic erotica author Chuck Tingle (one of the absolutely most unique voices and cadences we’ve heard in awhile) and friend McKenzie Goodwin celebrate their friendship every week for a podcast that’s preposterously funny and, also, more heartwarming than almost anything we’ve heard or seen. 

76. Joey Clift’s Telling People You’re Native American When You’re Not Native Is a Lot Like Telling a Bear You’re a Bear When You’re Not a Bear-Clift makes such biting, pun intended, commentary with this short film/PSA that is also so playful that the message about Native identity will undoubtedly stick with you.

77. Megan Gailey’s My Dad Paid For This-Gailey strikes a wonderful balance of charm and attitude and fervent desire to burn down the patriarchy. Such a mix accents her very delightful observations about herself and the world around her in this marvelous debut album. 

78. Robin Higgins as Baby Yoda at Tournament of Nerds-Higgins might have made one of the best, first attempts at Baby Yoda cosplay. She also, for what’s supposed to be a roast-style competition between fictional/pop culture characters, perfectly imagined how Baby Yoda would roast someone while maintaining Baby Yoda’s sweetness that has captured the hearts and minds of the Internet.

79. The Man Who Killed Don Quixote-Terry Gilliam went through hell, did a few laps, and came back over several years to get this meta-quixotic tale about reimagining the legendary novel Don Quixote made. The finished film, for us, was worth the wait. 

80. Jo Firestone on The Tonight Show-Jo’s sense of play is so pure and present that it’s kind of irresistible. Combined with a perfect amount of self-deprecation, Jo really delivered a terrific set we’ll probably never get tired of.

81. Paul Rudd continues his time honored tradition of playing that one clip of Mac & Me on Conan-Rudd evolves the arc of this long running bit on Conan where, instead of playing a clip of what he’s on Conan to promote, he plays the same exact clip of the universally panned alien comedy Mac & Me. We all know what’s coming and yet, without the benefit of surprise, Rudd’s annoyance of Conan still keeps on being so damn funny.

82. Billy on the Street featuring Reese and Mariah-This year, we were lucky enough to get two instantly classic episodes of Billy on the Street with Reese Witherspoon and Mariah Carey that gave us our fix for our obsession with Billy Eichner yelling at strangers on the streets of NYC.

83. The Dollop England & UK-As Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds embarked on an entire England & UK tour of The Dollop, they thought it prudent to do a mini-series specific to Great Britain and did a smashing job making fun of British history. The Cyril the Swan episode is particularly brilliant.

84. Lost Moon Radio-The live musical sketch comedy theater troupe (Lost Moon Radio truly lives up to such a description) marked their 10th anniversary and put on an absolutely fantastic “Summer Block Party” this year that both showed that they still got their ingenious musical sketch comedy chops. 

85. Nate Bargatze’s The Tennessee Kid-The calm with which Bargatze pervades all of his comedy is part of what makes it beloved by nearly any and all that see or hear Bargatze’s stand-up. That’s such the case now that Nate gives updates to stories from previous specials on this latest hour. 

86. Beth Stelling on Kimmel-Every detail of this set on Jimmy Kimmel Live is pretty stellar. That includes Beth, in general, for her warm demeanor, smile, and cleverness, the Chippendale’s story, Beth’s mom being there in the crowd, and, of course, the surprise guest at the end. 

87. Liz Climo’s Please Don’t Eat Me-This illustrated book is just the latest in a long line of uber-adorable and genuinely-funny-for-all-ages books from Climo. Liz seems to have quite the knack for making unlikely animal friendship jokes. 

88. John Hodgman’s Medallion Status-Hodgman’s journey through the various statuses of airline privilege/celebrity is a superb serving of existential humor, done up with Hodgman’s painstaking attention to the exactly right details. 

89. Jane Curtin’s 2019 New Year’s Resolution “My New Year’s Resolution Is To Make Sure The Republican Party Dies”-Said during a CNN interview with the SNL alum, this was the first thing to make us heartily laugh in 2019.

90. Alex Kavutskiy’s Squirrel-Kavutskiy’s short film dives into the concept of forgiveness unlike we’ve really seen and, as is Kavutskiy’s style, is so darkly spellbinding and so pointedly funny at the same time.

91. Astronomy Club: The Sketch Show-The long running comedy troupe known as Astronomy Club really ran with their chance to do a full-fledged sketch series on Netflix. They’re so endlessly clever on in their sketches, especially when it comes to the subjects of identity and oppression, and pack in so many jokes and sight gags that you’ll definitely want to watch it more than once so you don’t miss anything.

92. Dolemite Is My Name-Eddie Murphy seems poised to make a real return to comedy (and stand-up comedy in particular) and this marvelous biopic of comedian and blaxploitation star Rudy Ray Moore AKA Dolemite is the perfect way to start.

93. Anna Drezen on Corden-Drezen has such a perfect sense of farce and misdirection and puts on a beautiful display of those two things from start to finish in this set on The Late Late Show with James Corden. 

94. BUTT’s Yoda themed dating app sketch-This sketch is so prescient of the resurgence of the world’s current (baby) Yoda obsession. Also, while this is so absurd with its deep dive into various Yoda fan art and cosplay, Joe McAdam and Chris Stephens’ take on dating apps is so sharply and deeply funny. 

95. Mel Brooks Unwrapped-The never ending bit of attempting a documentary between Mel Brooks and the BBC’s Alan Yentob is yet another display of the true, unquestionable genius of Mel Brooks.

96. 50 First Stephs-The amazing, hysterical Steph Tolev kicked off 2019 with a show where 50 or so of her compatriots and contemporaries did various impressions and characterizations of her. Part roast, part loving tribute, part amazing showcase of the depth of creativity in LA comedy, Tolev’s night for herself was something really special.

97. The Bongo Hour with Sandy Honig and Peter Smith-Honig and Smith brought their wild variety show that featured such wonderful bits, characters, drag, and burlesque to LA and showed, truly, how much better life is when you’re fluid about nearly everything.

98. How Did This Get Played?-Hosts Nick Wiger and Heather Anne Campbell and their take on the “worst and weirdest” video games do their namesake, the beloved How Did This Get Made?, proud. Even if you’re not a gamer, the way they dissect the most bizarre video games ever made along with Heather and Nick’s chemistry is very, very enjoyable.

99. Joe Pera Talks With You Season 2-This second season of Joe Pera’s unique talk-to-the-viewer series is so calming that the comedic twists sneak up in the most delightful way possible. There is a certain beauty to Pera’s show that makes us want to have Joe Pera Talks With You playing on a loop in a contemporary art museum.

100. John Mulaney & The Sack Lunch Bunch-John Mulaney does “it”, yet again. “It” being releasing another hour of comedic brilliance that’s so markedly different than whatever he did before, yet, somehow still stamped with an indelible mark of Mulaney’s comedy of obtuse hyper-specificity. 

[twistedstxrs]

All the even questions in the ask for muns meme.

♛➺Aɴsᴡᴇʀᴇᴅ

☽↬Anonymous↫☾

Q: If you HAD to choose, who’s your favorite muse? 

A: Steve & Jace

Q: Is there a muse that not a lot of people roleplay with?

A: Yes, I’ve only really used a few more than once unfortunately. 

Q: Which one of your muses have you been playing the longest?

A: Daryl / Norman 

Q: What is each of your muses otps? notps?

A: You know for quite awhile the list of otps and notps for my muses was in my rules but I took it out because meh lol. But I’ll give a few because I do have quite a bit of muses lol 

Otps; Steve & Jonathan, Steve & Billy, Daryl & Jesus, Daryl & Beth, Daryl & Rick, Barry & Harry, Brian & Sean, Brian & Logan, Jack & Will, Frost & Pitch, Blue & Owen, Alexa & Baron, AJ & Baron, AJ & Alexa, Baron & Tyler, AJ & Tyler, Alexa & Tyler. Akira & Regulus, 10k & Red

Notps: Daryl & Carol, AJ & Charlotte, Baron & Naomi, Alexa & Murphy, Brian & Ted, Jack & Elizabeth, Steve & Tommy, Steve & Carol, Jesus & Aaron

Q: Which muse is the most fun to write for?

A: Steve, Jace

Q: What is something everyone should know about your muses before interacting?

A: They’re canon-divergent, and most  of them aint straight. Only Alexa is straight lmfao.

Q: Which muse has the most aus or verses?

A:  Steve LMFAO

Q: Which muse is most willing to fight another muse?

A: XD 100% Blue. I would have said AJ, Baron, Alexa, Tyler because that’s their job but outside their job, no. 

Q: Would you ship any of your muses together? Who?

A: Lmfao, yes if you look at my OTP list you’d know that I would and do. As for who, I’d all ship together from my muses; Steve & Jace, Jace & Parker, Jace & Ryker, Steve & Ryker, Barry & Harry, Daryl & Jesus, Daryl & 10K, Laney & Daryl, Jack & Sereia, Jace & Kiani, Parker & Kiani, Phoenix & Jasper.

Q: Have you ever considered making a multimuse/Is it easier having a multimuse?

A: Yes, obviously I have considered it :P Honestly in some ways its easier to have a multimuse instead of having to run some many blog, at least that way I can give them all my full attention. 

Q: Which muse is most likely to make new friends?

A: Without a doubt Jace, I mean there are some others too but definitely Jace

Q: Is there someone playing the same muse/s as you and you really look up to them?

A: Yes, because I adore them so much.

Q: Which muse is most likely to have kids?

A: Honestly they’d all have kids if they could, they aint exactly against the idea? Some of my muses are already a parent so lol. 

Q: Can you sort your muses from weakest to strongest?

A: I most certainly can but I won’t lol, because it didn’t say I had to, it just asked if I could :P 

Q: Most importantly, are you having fun playing each one of your muses?

A: Yes!!