#naked man friend

[lickthecowhappy]

Ineffable May - Day 2

Naked Man Friend

Day 1 | Ineffable May 2024 Repository | Day 3

“How's your naked man friend?” she asked me with a wink. “He isn't-” I began to fret, What will my husband think‽ “He isn't naked anymore!” I cried with great distress.  My husband looked at me like I had something to confess. It's true that I was harboring an unclothed, man-shaped being, but I had covered up the parts I was not keen on seeing! If it had been my other half who’d showed up in the nude,  I think that I would not have felt like such a skittish prude. Instead it is my former boss who's giving me the shakes and so I'll hyperventilate and have some Eccles cakes.

This one came together fairly easily. I spent more time on it than I intended but it's ok because it turned out really fun.

Day 1 | Ineffable May 2024 Repository | Day 3

[lordroma]

2. Naked Man Friend

Tumblr don't ban me please 😰 it's just a drawing

[sangitakoos]

Ineffable May - Day 2 🥰

Naked Man Friend

[void-of-existence]

Day two: Naked Man Friend

‘Ding!’ The bell rang as Nina and Maggie walked into the bookshop.

“Coming!” Aziraphale shouted, closing his book and getting up from his desk in the backroom. “What can I- Oh! Hello Maggie, Nina. Do you need something?” He grinned at them, locking his hands together behind him.

“Well, since everything happened so quickly after you came back, we never got to congratulate your return. So we just wanted to say welcome back.” Maggie started with a bright smile.

“She wanted to say welcome back. I just wanted to thank you for taking Crowley back. All he ever did while you were gone was complain, and cry, and get drunk. And I had to deal with his dumbass.” Nina corrected.

Aziraphale gave a short chuckle, “I’m sorry you had to deal with that. I know how Crowley can be.” A door slammed shut upstairs. “Speak of the devil.”

“Angel! What did you do with my pants?” He shouted.

“You don’t have to yell, Crowley, I’m just downstairs- and why would I have your pants?” Just as Aziraphale answered, Crowley tripped down the spiral staircase only in boxers.

“Well you- oh. Guests.” He stopped and stood next to the angel, leaning on his shoulder.

Aziraphale looked over at him, blushing. “Wh- …Why aren’t you wearing any clothes? It’s the middle of the day!”

“Is it really?” He looked up at a clock on the wall, “Well I’ll be damned.”

“Can’t you just miracle your clothes on or something? You’re standing practically naked in the middle of my bookshop, in broad daylight!” Aziraphale said, “It’s like the Jim situation all over again, except I’m pretty sure everyone on this street thinks we’re together.” He shoved him back towards the staircase, earning a few snickers from Maggie.

“Aren’t we?” Crowley looked back at him.

“Well, yes, but that’s not the point.”

“Then what is the point?..”

“The point is for you to go get dressed!” Aziraphale gave Crowley a kiss, then sent him back upstairs. “I am terribly sorry about that, now where were we-“ Nina and Maggie were already gone.

[xdestinykey]

Ineffable May Day #2- 😳 Naked Man Friend 🫢

“You’re funny. I love you. 😇”

[luke-o-lophus]

Ineffable Drabble for Ineffable May Day 2: Naked Man Friend

(757 words, prompts by @blairamok)

10:20 pm, Soho, 8 years after the apocalypse that wasn’t

“Look at this! This is why we never go to a bar”, Aziraphale almost whines, glaring at his own reflection on fancy sunglasses.

“So, a man slipped you his number. Big deal”, Crowley shrugs and downs the rest of his whiskey. A long hiss of satisfaction follows, earning him curious looks and more than one saucy wink. “No…Crowley, he stuffed it in my trousers! In...in my back pocket!” Aziraphale holds up the crumpled paper with his very fingertips, as if holding a dirty rag. That gets Crowley to look up.

“Repeat that for me, angel?” he takes a step forward, crowding his space. His shielded eyes momentarily look over the angel’s shorter corporation, scanning the crowd, then back to his wide eyes. Angels are supposed to sense love, but in that moment Aziraphale can almost taste the anger radiating off his demon.

“He…”, Aziraphale drops his hands and tosses the paper into a nearby bin. “My dear…can we just go?” Crowley nearly hisses out a scathing protest when he catches a faint tremor on pouting lips. “Fine”, he relents, pushing off the wall.

He follows his angel, making a beeline for the exit, as the sea of drunk people miraculously part before them. But he may have glanced a bit too long at a particular part of Aziraphale’s corporation, and the moment of distraction is enough for someone to breach the containment of his demonic miracle. A tall, blonde guy stops the angel in his tracks.

“I saw you throw away my number”, his tone is icy. “That was a mistake.” He then seems to notice Crowley and gives him a once over, “Could’ve just said you want your guard dog in it too. Could’ve fucked you both, you know.” Crowley’s eyes narrow behind the shades, but he knows not to react unless Aziraphale indicates he wants him to step in. Wait…was he a guard dog?

“Now there really is no need for that, and I am truly not interested”, Aziraphale is polite but firm, chin tilted up in quiet determination.

“They all say that, darling, but once they…”, the man’s hand reaches up towards his collar. But neither his sentence nor his arm have the chance to reach their destination. In a speed higher than perceptible to the human eye, Crowley’s hand had shot forward and grabbed his wrist before it could reach Aziraphale.

“You’re not his type, blondie,” Crowley’s voice is cool, his hold just strong enough to restrict without hurting. “You should go.” The man’s eyes are wide in disbelief, but when Crowley lets go he abruptly turns and disappears into the crowd. Whether it was another miracle or sheer fear, Aziraphale didn’t know. He clears his throat, trying and failing to offer an awkward smile at all the eyes on them. He feels a touch on his arm, a touch he knew well enough to not jerk away from even in this situation. “Come on, angel”, said Crowley in a voice that’s usually never heard outside the bookshop.

Half an hour later, there’s a wine bottle open between an ethereal and an occult being. Few words have been spoken. Crowley’s glasses are uncharacteristically on. From the experience of the last eight years, more so than the six thousand before them, Aziraphale knows there’s some guilt being drunk away across the table. He tries to say it wasn’t that big a deal, or that he doesn’t blame Crowley for convincing him to try out a bar. In the end he settles on, “That was very nice of you.”

Crowley’s mouth opens to just make some unintelligible noises, and the angel can’t help the warmth rising in his chest. So he pushes with a cheeky smile, “Whatever did you mean he wasn’t my type? Sounded like you do know what that is.”

Crowley’s brows shoot up over the top of his glasses, and he carelessly takes them off. “Oh yes angel”, he hisses with no real venom in his voice. “I recall you had a visitor some years ago, no? The street couldn’t shut up about your naked man friend. Tall, dark hair, no humanlike genitalia – yeah, the works”

Aziraphale gasps in mock indignation, hand to his chest, “I’ll have you know that’s but a filthy rumour! Well, the last two at least”

Crowley wishes his immediate choking on wine was also mock. But how can he complain much when that gets his angel to rush over and rub his back till he’s better?

Read: Next (bookshop) Prev (Before the Beginning)

[hjbirthdaywishes]

March 10, 2025

Happy 54 Birthday to Jon Hamm.

[nofomogirl]

Ineffable May: #2 Naked Man Friend

(check out the full list of prompts here)

Dear Diary,

being tasked with preparing for the Second Coming turned out to be unexpectedly uneventful. The only thing of note today was that I was compared to my predecessor right in the open. Usually, the angels try to be respectfully discreet about the topic.

Apparently, it's surprising how much less grace and dignity I possess.

Obviously, I kept my opinion to myself, as it would be in extremely poor taste to reveal such intimate details of another person's life but I really wished those angels could see just how dignified their previous Supreme Archangel had been when he showed up at my doorstep.

Oh yes, so graceful and dignified, he earned himself the title of my Naked Man Friend, the highest honour among humans.

It's okay, the angels don't know any better.

I will fix it.

[mx-anthony-janthony-crowley]

the fact that nina doesn't seem to have met crowley before surely means he's either been asleep since lockdown or Something Happened™️ and he hasn't seen aziraphale for a while, right? like she and aziraphale seem to know each other fairly well, she's been in the bookshop by the sounds of it, there's no way if crowley was hanging around like usual she wouldn't have met him yet...

[pirate-fanatic]

✨DAY 2 - NAKED MAN FRIEND✨

A knock at the door - Former archangel awaits, Undressed and clueless

[effin-ineffability]

[hjbirthdaywishes]

March 10, 2024

Happy 53 Birthday to Jon Hamm.

[melbatron5000]

I never saw jealousy either. Surprise and curiosity, yes. But Crowley knows it's just him and Aziraphale, that's the end. Aziraphale seems flustered, but wouldn't you be?

I interpret the coffee shop scene in S2 Ep 1 a bit differently than what I’ve read.

I don’t see jealousy at all.

This seems like a surprised reaction from Crowley. (Astonishment maybe?) Aziraphale got called out by Nina, and is clearly uncomfortable. Crowley could tell.

So later in their conversation, he teases Aziraphale, questioning why they aren’t in the bookshop.

But Crowley only wants to help Aziraphale. He knows the “something’s wrong” voice, is concerned and wants to find out what has upset Aziraphale.

When they go back to the bookshop, they’re in “us” mode, and Crowley casually holds the plate of eccles cakes while Aziraphale unlocks the shop. No signs of jealousy.

Once they enter the shop, Crowley tells Aziraphale that something a bit weird is going on with his old lot. No mention of a naked man. Our favorite demon is confused when Aziraphale says he might have an idea of what’s going in and calls for Jim.

Side note: How adorable is this? ❤️

I don’t think jealousy is even on the agenda. Aziraphale and Crowley know each other. They trust each other. It doesn’t even seem like it would cross either of their minds that anyone could interfere with the bond they have. Everyone else is in the periphery. It’s always just them. The group of the two of them.

[brainwormcity]

When the lady who sells you coffee mentions a naked man at your bookshop and now your husband thinks you're stepping out on him:

[moonlit-ady]

how's your naked man friend?

[monkeymomgnome]

What cracks me up about S2 is that so few people are talking about Jon Hamm's hams after everything else that happened.

JON HAMM Good Omens S02E01 "Chapter 1: The Arrival"