#nah it is pretty funny LMAO
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qcomicsy · 11 months ago
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AITA for firing my 18 year old from his job?
I (M33) have my son (M18) working for me nonsalaried in the family business since he was 10 years old. We had our share of arguments (regarding the job and other personal matters) and he started to live with his friends in another city ever since he moved out for college. He has his own job there too (with his roommates), but since it's a city away, his college, other job and personal life has making lack on the job I gave him lately, (even though he should be absolutely capable of assuming both responsibilities).
So last month when he showed up late to the job again, I told him that this job is serious, that it's a war out there, and I need my second lieutenant, anything less than total devotion is a waste of time and fired him off the job. After that, he told me he was leaving, I asked him to give his uniform back, and we haven't spoken with each other ever since.
I thought (and still do) that was the most logical conclusion to make but ever since my fight with him, a close family member (M??) (that helped me raise him) said I was out of line and I have “impossible standards” regarding my children, at pretty much the same week a friend of work called me asking if I didn't go too far this time (he knows about the altercation because my son visited him to ask advice about the matter). Also, the same family member who I mentioned previously refuses to talk to me without any snark or bitter remark as some form of “punishment” ever since my fight with my son.
My son hasn't called yet about the matter and I won't call him either.
On an unrelated note, I also just adopted another child (M12) and put him to work in the place my eldest had in the family business, and he's (my eldest) been acting extremely upset over that even though he tries not to show it. I don't understand why, since he couldn't do the job and my youngest wanted it. It just felt logical to put another person to do it.
TLDR: My son was unable to be a reliable person to keep the unpaid work I gave him ever since he was a child because of his other job, college and personal life in another city so I fired him and put my other new adopted son in his place and now work colleagues and family members has been implying I'm an asshole for it
AITA?
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mango-mya · 6 months ago
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Lmao a sudden headcanon pops out of my head. What if emperor awesome and Elora used to be exes?. Wonder what peepers reaction to that.
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This probably
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achillean-knight · 4 months ago
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Y'know, I always thought it kinda stupid that (spoilers for final fantasy 15 btw), that after the timeskip, literally EVERY dude in 15 has some sort of facial hair
But in retrospect... That seems pretty normal? LMAO I KEEP SEEING PEOPLE FROM MY CHILDHOOD HAVE GODDAMN FACIAL HAIR! Actors, voice actors, youtubers, where did y'all get that facial hair from HUH???
Except I do still think Ravus looks like Colonel Sanders, Boi shave that shit off
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slashersweethearts · 22 days ago
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really luv pondering the duality of my oc ships bc both amber and richie pulled the cute but weird girl w little to no real connections outside of them who had literally never been w anybody else.
n yet amber wound up w the most obsessive bitch to walk woodsboro’s 2 streets and 1 cornfield who would need the jaws of life just to be kept away from her bc she will NOT leave her tf alone BUUUUT she is down bad enough to be willing to kill for her. even after getting broken up w and stabbed in the shoulder.
meanwhile richard is out here fighting for his LIFE just tryna get his bitch back bc it turns out his detached from others to a clinical level shawty (who didn’t even date him out of any romantic interest. she saw him as like a brother she just didn’t know how to turn him down w/o being and/or feeling mean abt it 💀) surprise surprise could also just detach herself from him w relative ease 😭 and he only cheated ONE TIME!!! (that she knows of 😭)
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bootyful-seventeen · 9 months ago
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Anyways as a resident senior to many, I urge you to get physicals of the media you love because you don’t know if they’ll ever remove the digital version of it
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monty-glasses-roxy · 1 year ago
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The Ruined pizzaplex is steeped in death and disrepair, it’s almost to the point that when the others are finally Meteor-ed, they don’t even know if they’ll survive escaping the damn place. None of them know, it’s a death trap. I don’t even think some of them expected to live for long after they escaped
But then they do, and they’re in a completely unfamiliar world that’s saturated with life and it’s unlike anything they’ve ever been exposed to before. Fazent always carried that touch of death, yknow? They never knew any different.
But then they claw their way into the light and someone is wrapping a blanket around their shoulders and giving them a bottle of water and asking if they’re ok because they must’ve just been Changed, they look so disoriented, and they don’t know what to do.
But they have each other, they’re *alive* again. The scars will never go away, but they have each other, and they desperately hope that’s enough.
YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE-
Fsdfsdf nah though you're on the right lines with this... may I offer...
The Plex is dead. It's stagnant, forever unchanging and is left to rot like all the other bodies under the floorboards. Those that remain are rotting and hurt, discarded like broken and unwanted toys and abandoned in the ruins of what is the only world, the only home they've ever known.
... But it's not dead.
How can it be? They're still there. They're still alive.
And like a phoenix rising from the ashes, they'll realise that for themselves and start laying the kindle for their fire.
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the-mehlwurm · 2 months ago
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god was i average in school
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amethiosspouse · 5 months ago
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me after loving AresOri only to find out people dont like it that much:
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i understand both sides of the argument and i dont wanna get into a whole ass debate abt it, its just that i find it funny that all the fandoms/pieces of media i tend to enjoy within a franchise tends to be the most hated ones within the community.
beyblade burst, ina11 ares-ori, pkmn scarvio (or any newer pkmn games in general) and for some reason people hate the 2021 shaman king version cuz it doesnt have the same art style or smth along the lines of that. i just find it funny that this has happened on multiple occassions
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rockium-z · 8 months ago
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A S S.
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frogmascquerade · 1 year ago
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.
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diorstarr · 2 years ago
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anxiety is so weird. like wdym i can’t start a show/watch a movie or whatever bc there’s too many choices. girl. to give yourself less choices you have to start somewhere!!!!
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ham1lton · 5 months ago
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omg i had a similar idea about how yn’s birthday would be what exposed lewisyn but i didn’t send it bc i didn’t think you’d like it 🫣🫣🫣 i was just thinking that he’d get her something REALLY nice and everyone’s like 🤨🤔 whose boss would get them this….(as a kpop girlie my headcanon was that he flies her to coachella to see blackpink vip LMAO but honestly your choice)
author’s note: LEWISYN LEWISYN *we all chant in unison*. this is a part of the dream girl universe but can be read as a stand alone! also i’m posting the oscaryn fic tomorrow! so keep an eye out for that :D
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liked by bestie1, alexandrasaintmleux and 728,928 others.
yourusername: when your boss pays for an all inclusive holiday for you and your girls for your birthday, but you miss his dog so you force him to send you updates every day 😔
view all 47,982 comments
user1: happy bday girl but this isn’t normal 😭
-> user2: bye she’s so real for this because if i could get exclusive lewis hamilton selfies I WOULD 😭
user3: you posted a darry ring box on your story? who bought it for you?
-> yourusername: lewis! :)
-> user4: hey babe… that’s literally INSANE
-> user5: idgi? what’s a darry ring? why is it insane? it’s just jewellery 🤷🏾‍♀️
-> user4: you can only buy ONE darry ring per LIFETIME. they make you submit your id so you can never buy another. it’s meant to be for your soulmate 😭 and lewis bought one for his ASSISTANT 😭
-> user5: nah, they GOTTA be fucking.
-> user4: worse. they’re in love.
carmenmmundt: HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET GIRL ♥️
-> yourusername: i can’t even believe it but thank you babe!!! mwah!! we’ll go out as soon as i come back!!! :D
-> user6: my fav wags :(( gonna miss yn when lewis goes to ferrari :((
bestie1: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BESTIE!!! SEXIEST GIRL EVER!!!!!!11!!!111
*liked by yourusername.*
user19: people talking about the darry ring like what about the HOLIDAY TO HER FAVOURITE PLACE??? like that is literally CRAZY???
-> user19: … you hiring? lewishamilton 👀
-> user21: fuck that, do you have an opening in your relationship? lewishamilton yourusername? 👀 bitch scooch over!! i want y’all 🤷🏻‍♀️
user20: what f1 driver wants to have a weird codependent relationship with a romantic subtext with me?
-> user21: i didn’t realise how much of a wattpad ass trope lewisyn is 😭 rich older famous hot boss and younger funny pretty employee who does whatever she wants while the boss is just fondly endeared.
-> user22: THAT SHOULD BE ME!!!!! 😔
-> user20: we can still do it oscarpiastri
-> oscarpiastri: no thank you! 🙂‍↔️
user28: yourusername are you and lewis dating be honest?
-> yourusername: NO 😭 i am definitely still single. lewis and i are just close friends that’s it!
-> user29: he said ‘happy birthday to my favourite girl, i want to spend all the rest of them with you’ in his post to you…. THATS A BOYFRIEND ASS QUOTE DONT LIE 😭
-> yourusername: that’s really normal??? like i’m sorry that you don’t have a decent relationship with your boss? 😭
user10: this whole bday thing is so funny cause why is yn trying to pass this as a normal employee and employer relationship 😭
-> user11: like you don’t see charles taking his assistant on romantic candlelit dinners do you 😭
-> user12: maybe if he does that, he’ll win a wdc. lewis does it, and he won eight, to ME!
user26: her insta stories are packed with all the gifts he bought her omg. someone tallied it all up and why did it amount to 2.7 million?!????
-> user27: IM SO JEALOUS
alexandrasaintmleux: next time brunch is on me ! 🥰 happy birthday honey 💕
-> yourusername: ily alex :(
-> user7: 1644 got the baddest bitches i know that’s right!
user13: lewisyn be normal challenge: FAILED!
-> user14: lewisyn be hopelessly in love with each other and co-parent lewis’ dog together challenge: COMPLETE!
user15: everyone talking about how weird it is that lewis spoils yn for her bday but why can’t we NORMALISE this?????? i want MY lazy ass boss to see shit like this and feel so ashamed that he books me on a cruise or some shit 😭
user17: LEWISYN CONFIRMED !!! WE CHEERED !!
-> user18: did you see his birthday post to her? babe it’s BEEN confirmed 😭
user24: im new to this. is yn lewis’ wag?
-> user25: no! she’s his assistant.
-> user24: don’t believe it. sorry.
user16: to everyone thinking this is weird, lewis’ team are like family to him. yn has been with him for almost a decade. like ofc he’s gonna reward loyalty? especially when she’s gotten offers from other celebs and brands. she could have pivoted to being an influencer but she likes working for lewis and it’s clearly mutual?
*liked by yourusername.*
landonorris: did you get my flowers?
-> yourusername: no?? :(
-> lewishamilton: roscoe ate them. my bad.
-> user8: MESSY ASS 😭 that dog did not eat those damn flowers.
-> user9: roscoe at home rn like … what he say fuck me for 🐶
-> yourusername: dw lando!! we’ll still have our weekly movie night when i come back!!
-> landonorris: :D
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— dream girl taglist: @flowergirl1134 @laur20a23 @greantii @rafebun @sumlovesjude @papayadays
— all works taglist: @luvsforme @yelenasloverrrrr @donttouchthegnote @chelle1306 @bloodyymaryyy @aliciaablueprint @lennnooshh @km-23mr @stinkyjax @f1kenzzz @ctrlyomomma @theblueblub @lavisenri @marshmummy @23victoria @ourlifeforchaos @namgification @tallrock35 @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @ariellovelynn @shhhchriss @lifeless-firefly @xylinasdiary @evie-119 @itseightbeats @tsireyasgf @landososcar @yongi-lee @maxlarens @velentine @m1892 (if you were on more than one of the taglists, i’ve only tagged you once! :) also if you’re on the solo lewis taglist, i’ll tag you in the mentions as tumblr limits mentions at 50 per post!! :( and if you’d like to join either taglist, fill out this form! make sure you read the explanatory box, fill the form out correctly and allow your account to be tagged or i can’t tag you!)
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othercrossee · 2 years ago
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For me, making Irida and Adaman into their late 20s is actually very good for the development and more history for both of their relationship
#z rambles#to makw things more concrete (?) ig lmao#irida was chosen as clan leader at 20 when sour her relationship with palina until the growlith incident happen and it got worse at 23#same year when she became clan leader. here shes def indecisive and lack confidence. due to worries shes unable to see the bigger pictures#adaman becsme clan leader at 23 too so 2 years before irida. he was....def clumsy at first due to his impatience he got into trouble a lot#the war actually was put on pause for years due to the clan leaders failing health. before the pearl clan leader died-#he asked for a meeting at jubilife with kamado and with the newly appointed leader adaman. he annouced that hell step down#and irida will take his place and that he hope kamado will see the clan relation thru and make them as he said.#*better than what me and that old coot did* and i csn tell u already those two did NOTTT WASTE ANY TIME ON THE BICKERING#It came naturally to them and the old pearl leader is like ah just like me before fr but dont let the bickering turns to war kids 👍#the old pearl def said sth like *that miserable old man is probably gonna scold me for wasting too much time tryibg to die peacefully*#i feel like what he said here will be used years later in a convo with those two#their relationship def involve bickering still as usual but i think it had serious very real malicious intent in it than a one off#they were pretty young then#if ur asking sbout the old diamond leader desth#he basically almost drop dead celabrating adaman succession to the role and sinner was like OLD MAN IS DYING 💀💀💀#and immediatly got a smack with his cane cuz hs is not dead. he died tomorrow👍ssying sth snout being the one whos punctual even till desth#sinner: nah is he throwing shade at the pearl leader even in death wth 💀😭// adaman: can u read the room🧍‍♂️#so funny to kmow the two old guys who caused thr war ended up being oretty chummy with each other in their ELDER years#its jsut funny like u csnt be doing this but it is very on brand for old people to do that tbh#honestly if this makes no sense and doesnt correspomd to info given to us in the game idc 😭😭😭😭
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landograndprix · 8 months ago
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╰┈➤ ❝ desire • l.n c.l ❞ xi
part ten - part twelve
➪ Charles hasn't paid much attention to you after your daughter was born but a certain Brit does.
➪ charles finally realizes things between you and lando are in fact serious.
➪ mom!reader x dad!Charles x lando
➪ sorry this took so long :') charles needs professional help <3
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milliexoxo
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liked by y/nusername, logansargeant and 5,784 others
milliexoxo okay but my mom speaks italian
tagged: landonorris, y/nusername, carlossainz55
view all 583 comments
norrizz NAH MISS ZOE LECLERC SIT DOWN IM NOT READY FOR YOU TO STAND
↳ yukisan HONESTLY WHATS NEXT WALKING?!
bott_ass HAVE Y'ALL NOT SEEN MILS LATEST VLOG SHE DOES WALK ALREADY
norrizz NAH SEDATE ME IM NOT READY FOR THIS
norry4 Y'ALL FORGOT ITS HER 1ST BIRTHDAY IN LIKE 2 WEEKS?!
landoscar look at mom and dad :(
julieeeexo refuse to believe that's zoë, why is she growing so fast?!
carlandooo carlos and zoë?! 🥺
↳ sharl16 charles punching air rn 😂
charliecharlie aw I'm becoming the biggest y/nlando shipper 😩
logansargeant love the new haircut. 🔥
↳ hamilt44n asjklmsks arianna what are you doing here?!
grussell63 @.y/nusername help your kid out 😭
landonorizzzz pls @.y/nusername adopt logan as well 😭
landofourr wait is this considered a y/nlando hard launch?
↳ chilisainz girl they don't need a hard launch, it's so obvious with everything they do 💀
versainz155 carlos casually hanging out with lando and his little family is what I'm living for <3
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y/nusername posted to their story
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charles_leclerc replied to your story
charles_leclerc
Where's zoë?
y/nusername
with millie
charles_leclerc
What hotel are you staying in?
y/nusername
we rented a place, zoë is not stuck in a hotel room if that's what you're hinting at, she's able to crawl and walk around all she want.
charles_leclerc
You go on a lot of dates with lando and leave zoë with someone else
y/nusername
you're joking, right?
you're becoming a real asshole, Charles
get a grip
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y/nusername
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liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell and 768,523 others
y/nusername quando in Italia 🧀 🍝 (when in italy)
tagged: landonorris, milliexoxo
view all 1,176 comments
norry4 not the bucket hat, my girl has been hanging around with lando to much 😩
milliexoxo I told y'all my mom speaks Italian
↳ charlesgirlies your 'mom' speaks Italian because her baby daddy is half italian
oscarpastry charles is not half Italian 💀
charlesgirlies girl, he is in spirit lmao
bobnorriz lando and zoë content y'all 🥰
norstappen not really sure if I like the fact zoë is walking but okay..rude :(
el645 when are you going to admit you cheated on charles?
↳ hamilt44n oh god the stalker made its way to insta 💀
yukisan when is charles going to admit he cheated on y/n?
el645 aren't yall curious why they broke up?
charlescharles dude we don't need to know why they broke up? 🤡
landonorris been cooking with my best friend 💜
↳ hamiltonh SHUT UP 😭😭 😭
milliexoxo close to turning a year and still a better cook than you
bott_ass girl you're never going to get along with your stepdad if you keep bullying him like this
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y/nusername
📍 Nice, France
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liked by milliexoxo, maxfewtrell and 675,458 others
y/nusername a year ago the tiniest little girl changed my life for the better, happy 1st birthday to our silly little bear ❤️❤️❤️❤️
view all 1,425 comments
bott_ass happy birthday zoë!
maxfewtrell happy 1st birthday to my best friend ❤️
riabish happy birthday pretty girl! 💜💜
logansargeant happy 1st birthday zoë!
↳ hamilt44n I love this, I hope y/n adopted Logan 🥺
milliexoxo my silly little girlfriend, hope you have the happiest of birthdays! <3
carlossainz55 happy birthday to the funniest girl ❤️
norrizz this girlie is so loved 😭 happy b-day little princess! 😍
el645 funny for someone who didn't want a kid in the first place
↳ chilisainz Noelle get your ass out of here
norry4 man's must be blind, this woman LOVES her daughter
lando happy birthday to our little bear 🐻
↳ y/nusername ❤️❤️
landonorris ❤️❤️
yukisan everyday I come on this app and cry :(
charles16 Monaco gp week? Nah, it's been Zoë her week ❤️
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y/nusername
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liked by milliexoxo, maxfewtrell and 698,452 others
y/nusername the bestest company. <3
tagged: milliexoxo, logansargeant, landonorris, liamlawson30
yukisan Logan had been officially adopted 😭
↳ grussell63 and Liam & his girlfriend?! 😭
lewisham Liam and y/n gave little brother big sister vibes back when Liam took dr3 his seat for a while, I'm not surprised!
norrizz I don't think y'all realize y/n started socialising way more after she left charles, I wonder with who she's hanging out with 👀
landoscar lando and oscar content thank you queen!!!!
norry4 mom and dad with their kids <3
chilisainz wonder where the die hard y/ncharles shippers are right now..
↳ yukisan probably still skipping around in delululand
mcnorris lads, she's still dating charles, lando and y/n are just friends...duh 🤪
yukisan if that's what it's like to have lando as just a friend, can I have him as a friend as well 😭
lawsonbaby LIAM?! CANT WAIT TO SEE THE VLOG
carlando they're insta official 🥺
maxfewtrell cute but where am I?
↳ milliexoxo this post is meant for the cute people..
landonorris and yet you're in it..
milliexoxo 😲
y/nusername contrary to popular beliefs, I'm actually nice and didn't want to turn you into another meme
maxfewtrell I appreciate that, thanks mate ❤️
nortrell MATE?! Best buds these two 😭
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Desire taglist; @fangirl-dot-cm @sainzluvrr @writingworlds @chezmardybum @lewisvinga @xjval @fanficweasley @rockyhayzkid @aundercover @thecubanator2 @minchedchilli @crimeshowjunkie @alisoncasey21 @eeviepepi08 @shamelesspotatos @sleepybrokenmelle @leireggsworld @janeholt3 @iamahalicinationn @dessxoxsworld @kapsylia @22yuki @dark-night-sky-99 @sheslikeacurse @nerdreader
Everything taglist; @thomaslefteyebrow @hopefulinlove @smoothopz @softboystarkey @honethatty12 @cixrosie @parkersmjs @ireadthensuetheauthors @celestialams @be-your-coffee-pot @heli991113 @kodzuvk @reality-is-a-con @80sloverry @bibissparkles @myescapefromthislife @lanando4 @elliegrey2803 @ravisinghs-wife @harrysdimple05 @minkyungseokie @pretty-little-bunny382728 @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @severewobblerlightdragon @cherry-piee @namgification @mycenterfold @devineendevers @celestialend
Lando taglist: @beatricemiruna @simp-for-fictional-people @landossainz @christianpulisic10 @bored-brunette2 @i83andrew @mcmuppet @justdreamersdream
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whorelaud · 19 days ago
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꒦꒷ 𓈒 𓈒 𓈒 birthday sex ¿¡
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pairing bf¡drew starkey x fem¡reader
summary just reader dealing with horny drew while hes away on his birthday
contatins fluff, slightly suggestive, age gap, drew texting like an old man!!
a/n little birthday texting oneshot because i love him so much agh!!
word count 702
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ml <3: Where is my happy birthday?
You grinned, perking up when you noticed the message you received from your boyfriend. You typed in a quick response, knowing how sulky he gets when you take long to reply, especially when he’s away. 
You: okay damn straight to the point
You: it hasnt even turned 12 yet :( 
ml <3: Gurl 
You: men used to go to the war
You: now they have sass competitions w/ their girlfriends 😒
ml <3: Lolll 
ml <3: That’s not funny
You: why are you loling then old man
ml <3:: Hey! I’m not that old
You: well
You: u JUST turned 31 
You: HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABYYY I LOVE YOU
You: I wish I can see you :( 
ml <3: Hahaha thank youuuu!
ml <3: I love you beautiful 
ml <3: I can't wait to land I miss my pretty girlfriend 
You: stawppp blushes like a slut
ml <3: ??? Excuse me! 
ml <3: Proof? Send picture
You: u nasty
You: are u into that degrading shit
ml <3: I mean
ml <3: I don’t mind it 
ml <3: If you like it then I do and if you don't then it’s okay. Either way I am happy as long as you’re content baby!
You: stop why’d u take that so srsly i was joking
You: is this the perks of turning 31
ml <3: Ugh 🙄
ml <3: You always do this!
You: ugh ure so cute i cant believe ure 21
You: 31* oops
ml <3: Are you shaming me for growing now?
You: no i love u
ml <3: You* 
You: i have a surprise for u
You: i cant wait for u to land 
ml <3: YOU HAVE A SURPRISE FOR ME??? 😇
You: yeahahh 
ml <3: What is it
ml <3: Please show me Please Pleaseeeeee
You: its a surprise i cant :( when u get home i swear!
ml <3: Did you get me condoms? 
You: pardon me!
You: when have i ever gotten you condoms for ur birthday
ml <3: 😏
You: get that skunky face off my screen
ml <3: 😒
You: LMAO 
ml <3: Tell me!
You: i cant baby that will ruin the surprise 
ml <3: Are you like… 
You: ??? am i what
ml <3: did you actually get me condoms
You: why do u keep bringing up the condoms is it on ur birthday wishlist or something
ml <3: It’s not a bad present 
You: DREW. 
ml <3: Can we fuck when I get back
You: oh
ml <3: Ugh I miss you
ml <3: Jus’ thought about fucking you and now I’m horny
You: are u like
ml <3: Am I what baby
You: are u trolling ahaha is this a joke
ml <3: …
You: drew omff
You: why would you say that
ml <3: Sorry baby
ml <3: Fuck I miss your lips
You: which ones
You: i take that back please dont answer
ml <3: Both
ml <3: Can we have birthday sex please
You: hello??? where did that come from
ml <3:: Sorry I’m horny
ml <3: Do you think it feels different from normal sex
You: well if i had to guess it would probably be more thrilling, maybe?
ml <3: We should test out that theory
ml <3: Verify whether it’s true 
You: shush omg
You: u suck
ml <3: My dick
ml <3: can you suck my dick when I’m back
You: omg shut up
ml <3: Is that a no? :( 
You: yeah… ur 31!!! too old 4 me
ml <3: Nah you're right I could be your father
You: k its not that bad
You: it’s only 4 years
ml <3: 6*
ml <3: actually
ml <3: 7 now what the fuck
You: STOPP 
You: ure so cute please marry me 
ml <3: Lol 
ml <3: I’m horny
You: drew omg
ml <3: Should I rub one out in the plane bathroom?
You: 🤦‍♀️
You: just wait until ure back 
ml <3: Wait
ml <3: WAIT AXTUALLY? 
You: WHAT
ml <3: ARE YOU BEING SERIOUS
ml <3: Omg I am so Excited 
You: loser 
ml <3: So, birthday sex yeah?
You: i hate you
ml <3: i love you too baby 
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all-purpose-dish-soap · 4 months ago
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hi hello!! i love both your mer aus theyre wonderful omg
could we mayhaps have more of gaz seeing through remora readers shit and being so over it? like (if i remember correctly) he likes annoying the real her out when he feels like shes sunken too deep into the brainless lil fishy thing, but what exactly does he do? now that im actually thinking abt it i lowkey just wanna see them sass each other lmao
-- monstie >:3
pspspsps mer Gaz enjoyers @thoseofmonsters @persephone-kore-law @cod-z
47 / 1.2k
...
You peek out of the water's surface next to Gaz. He's laid out on a smooth, flat rock, sunning. You'd think he's indulging himself, but he does this all the time.
"Gaz?" you pipe up. "Aren't you drying out?"
Gaz peels an eyelid open, squinting in the sunlight as he glances over to you. The motion is lazy in the heat of the day. "Nah."
You glance up at the gulls gliding by overhead. You don't trust them. "Well... aren't you hot?"
"S'pose. Not uncomfortable, though." Gaz closes his eyes again, basking leisurely. He pats the rock next to him, offering the open space. "Sit with me."
"No, thank you."
Gaz cracks a single eye open at that, frowning. "Why not?"
You clutch the edge of the rock with nervous hands and glance over your shoulder. "There are boats over there. Humans."
"So? You like humans.”
"When they're in the water," you mutter. You eye the boats in the distance. They're small, but they're not diving boats. "But not like that."
Gaz rolls onto his side, propping himself up on an elbow to look at you. He doesn't so much as glance in the direction you're looking. "I'm not gonna let anything happen to you if that's what you're worried about."
"Don't they look at you funny? When they see you up here?"
"Maybe." He rolls onto his back again, stretches his arms overhead, arches his back, and lets out a content sigh. Then he laces his fingers behind his head. "Don’t care. I like being out here. They can ogle me as much as they want."
You notice the boats aren't coming too close, either. "They don't try to talk to you?"
"They do." The corners of Gaz’s eyes crinkle. "I ignore them. Most get the message pretty quick and steer clear.” He glances at you. “What's wrong? You're more skittish than usual.”
You grab his hand and tug it. "Come on, we need to go back to the reef now."
Gaz peers down at you over the ridge of his bicep. "Not quite yet." He closes his eyes again. "I’m comfy."
"Please?" You rummage around your brainthoughts trying to come up with a reason. "I need your help with something."
"With what something?"
"With something. And you're the only one who can do it."
"Yeah?"
"And it has to be now."
He smirks at your pitiful efforts to budge him. Your persistence is cute. "And what is this it that I have to do right this instant?"
"It's... taking me to the cliffs where the seabirds nest."
"You know how to get there."
"But Ghost will get mad if I go alone.”
"Then say I took you. He's asleep. He won't know."
You huff. "Gaz, that's lying."
Gaz rolls onto his side again to look down at you. "Oh, tsk, tsk. Poor little thing. Always so honest and forthcoming yourself, aren’t you?"
Heat pinches the hollow of your throat. He's shaming you.
Gaz leans in, his voice low and lazy. "Tell me something, darling. Do you pretend your head is empty because you can’t help yourself, or because you’re afraid not to?"
You sink down into the water until only your eyes peek out. Heat licks all the way down your chest, radiating against the cold water. "You're being mean."
"Am I?" he croons, his lips curled smug. "I don’t like it when you play dumb. Makes me want to be mean."
If you were a bolder creature, you'd call him a brute.
He reaches out and gives your ear a fond flick.  "S’cute when you pout."
"So you're not coming with me?" you mumble.
"Mm, I didn't say that." Gaz glances up at the sky as he pretends to consider your wants. The corners of his mouth tug up into that dimpled smile of his that never quite disappears. "I'll take you there if you lay with me."
You grasp the edge of the rock again, pulling yourself closer again in relief. "You will? By the cliffs?"
"No." He pats his sunning rock again. "Here."
You look down at the salty, ocean-smoothed stone. "But people will see."
"Don’t care." He pats again, more firmly this time. "Come up. Get warm. You're worrying so much it’s wearing me out just watching you.”
You glance over your shoulder again. It's not like you haven't laid out in the sun before. You like to snooze in the sun as much as any mer. But it always seems to attract attention. Human attention. You're not scary-looking to them like Gaz is. You're more like a novelty. A bauble. Something from old sailing stories.
Humans get way too close to you if you give them the opportunity.
Gaz watches you. “You really think I’d let anyone lay a hand on you?”
"No, but..."
Gaz reaches out and gently grips your face, turning you to look at him again. “Now," he says calmly.
You nod at the command. "Okay. Now. Yes." For Gaz. Your fingers flutter over the edge of the rock as you look for a place to pull yourself up. You try to tune out the ambient human noise behind you.
Gaz helps you pull yourself up out of the water, depositing you on the sun-warmed rock next to him. You end up on your side, mirroring him chest-to-chest.
You stare at his collarbone. "Hi."
He slides a warm, rough-skinned palm up under your jaw to tilt your chin. “Hi yourself.”
His sharkshin feels strange when it’s dry. Not bad, but... strange. Still smooth, but grainy with salt. And it's cold up here. Even in the sun, the breeze makes you shiver and duck into Gaz's chest. You still feel so exposed with your bare back to the busy shallows.
“Relax. Fussy thing.” Price’s words. Gaz pulls you against him, one arm curled over you. Then he stretches out on his back, bringing you with him to sprawl over his chest. He drapes his hand over the fin that trails down the base of your spine, rubbing his thumb over the arch of your lower back.
"Better?" he asks, his voice barely above a rumble against your ear.
"I guess so." Not really.
"Don’t pout. No one’s gonna come up to you while I’m here, you know. Only thing snatching you off these rocks is me. That make you feel safe? Cuddling up with the most dangerous thing here?”
You give him a flat look, still feeling your earlier embarrassment. You’d push him off this stupid rock if you could.
His grin widens. "Don't look at me like that. You started this."
"I'm telling Ghost."
"Tattle-tale."
"Hmph." You wriggle over until you slide into the crook of his other arm with your hand on his chest. This way, you can see the humans and their boats over him, but you're mostly hidden from view.
"Sullen little…" Gaz's other arm slides over your back, holding you snugly to him. One big hand comes up to cup the back of your neck, his thumb rubbing in a way that makes your eyelids flutter. His mouth is right next to your ear. "Now will you stop flinching every time a boat passes?"
“Okay."
"Good. Now stay," he orders in a low voice, "and stop wriggling."
...
more mer au / more Gaz / masterlist
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