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cuddlesslut · 4 years ago

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Part Eight: Hope

Atsumu x fem reader , Suna x fem Reader, Hinata x Fem reader

A/N: I’m so sorry it took so long to put out this chapter I’m gunna try to do better on posting faster. I’ve had a lot of stuff happening irl. I love see so many of your write in for the poll 😂 I did not expect Sakusa to pop off! I hope y’all like this chapter. Again it’s still kind of short but I wanted to get it posted. Also you can’t convince me Hinata doesn’t use an all in one cleanser!

Warning: crude language, not much angst, some fluff.

Part Seven: Regrets

Hinata stared at his phone questioning whether he should message you again. It had been four days since you ran out of his apartment. You had yet to respond to any of his texts. As concerned as he is he knows no good will come from spamming you. Although he wants nothing more than for you too talk to him. He was so confused where you both stood. But he was sure of one thing, and that was that things couldn’t go back to the way they were before. He can’t go back to pushing down his feelings and pretending he doesn’t want to be more. That he didn’t want to call you his and show you off to the world. To take you out on dates try new experiences and make memories with you. He can’t keep acting like he doesn’t dream of waking up to you in his arms every morning. He wants to be there with you every step in life and support you no matter what. He wants to show you that you are the most amazing woman he’s ever known. As much as the sex is amazing it’s not worth holding back anymore. He knows you may still not be ready for a relationship and he wouldn’t think about pressuring you into one after how horribly your last ended, he’d gladly wait for you to be ready but he has to be honest with his feelings instead of torturing himself.

The sound of his alarm snapped him out of his daze. Time to get ready for practice, he groaned pulling himself from the comfort of his bed before heading to the shower to start his day. He shuffled in the bathroom hooking up his phone to his Bluetooth speaker starting up with morning playlist beginning his morning routine. He loved jamming in the shower. He turned the water on letting the heat build as he brushed his teeth before climbing into the steaming shower bopping his head to the beat of silhouette by Kana-boon having to refrain himself from attempting to naruto running in the slippery bath. He stood there for a moment enjoying the heat hitting his back and loosening his muscles. Losing himself in the music as he grabbed his three in one, body wash, shampoo and conditioner. He scrubbed his hair and body screaming the lyrics to the next song. “Sawaras nai kimi wa shojo wa na no Boku wa yarichinbitchi no osu da yo !!,” he was jamming out when the song was interrupted by the sound of a notification. He thought nothing of it figuring it was just Bokuto-San. When the chimes continue his curiosity won out as he peeked out passed the curtain still covered in bubbles to see who was spamming his phone. His eyes grew wide as he saw your name lighting up his notifications. He rushed for his phone loosing his balance and slamming the shower wall to keep himself from falling on his ass as he scrambled out still dripping and soapy as he stood in bathroom unlocking his phone.

YN-Chan 🧡: Hey Shoyo

YN-Chan🧡: you’re usually up by now so I thought I’d message you to say I’m soo soo sorry for how I ran out the other day.

YN-Chan🧡: honestly I should have messaged you days ago but I’ve just been dealing with a lot . It’s no excuse but still I’m sorry.

YN-Chan 🧡: look I totally understand if you don’t want talk to me after how I acted but if you do I was hoping we could get together and talk?

Hinata could see the text bubble at the bottom showing she was typing but he wasted no time pulling up the call button needing to here your voice. It rang two times before connecting. His heart clinched hearing your soft hello.

“Hey Sho,” you answered.

“Hey there YN-Chan,” he greeted back.

He could here a sense of nervousness in your tone. “Hey sorry if interrupted anything.” He realized how hard he was breathing from excitement and from nearly dying trying to escape his shower.

“Oh no no, its fine I wasn’t busy,” he feigned nonchalance. There was a beat of silence as you both searched for words.

“Umm you had said you wanted to talk?” He questioned. He was really concerned for why you ran off that day.

“Oh yeah but I’d much rather talk in person, is there anyway we could get together soon I understand if you’re busy,”

“I’m free tonight,” he cursed himself for how desperate he sounded, “uhh do you want to come over tonight?”

You chuckled at his eagerness. “If it’s okay with you maybe we could go out... to like dinner maybe,” his heart froze his mind reeling with excitement you had never gone out before. Always just opting to have food delivered and eating in. He couldn’t help but let his hopes rise.

“I know it’s not what we usually do so I get if you’re uncomfor-”

“I’d love to!” He cuts you off. Not wanting to miss this chance.

“A-awesome um is 7:30 good for you?” You questioned.

“Yep!” He could feeling his heart soaring as the plans started to solidify.

“Great well I’ll message you all of the details later, bye Sho umm I’ll see you tonight.”

“Goodbye YN-Chan, can’t wait!” He heard a small laugh leave your lips before the line disconnected. There is a wide smile spread across his face as leaning against the wall next to him not even upset that his shower water was now starting to run cold.

Hinata’s day was instantly better with thought of seeing you tonight the Idea of having a date with you filled him with joy. Everyone could see the difference in the outside hitter today compared to the last few practices. It’s was like he was in the zone. He was all over the court making the cleanest receives and his spikes were just so on point. It was time for there first water break and stretch. He sat on the bench taking a gulp of water a big smile present on his face when he checks his phone to see a message with a restaurant address. His teammates shared a look at the way the ginger stared at his phone.

“What’s got you so happy Hinata?” Sakusa questioned.

“Yeah Sho you’ve been on fire today plus you won’t stop smiling at your phone!” Bokuto boasted wrapping an arm around his newest teammate.

“That obvious huh?” Hinata grinned. “Well uhh the girl I’ve been talking to wants to go on a date tonight!”

“Oh yeah?” Atsumu smirked “the same girl that’s been marking up yer back recently?” Bokuto and the Setter busted into laughter when Hinata’s faced turned red. Sakusa rolled his eye at the childish behavior.

“Uh haha yeah that’s the one,” he chuckled rubbing the back of his head.

“Well if you’re already fuckin her why are you getting all giddy over a date?” The setter asked

“We’ve actually never been on date before,” Hinata admitted.

“Damn Sho, first date! Why’d you wait so long dude?” Bo wondered.

“Really Hinata-Kun I didn’t take you for the casual sex type,” Sakusa stated

“She’s a friend but I’ve like her pretty much since we met but she’s just not ready for a relationship,” he explains “ she has some bad history but we kept fooling around as friends. I’m so excited cause she asked if I wanted to get dinner so I’m hoping maybe she’s starting to open up to the idea.”

“Ha well good luck then bro,” Bokuto smacked him on the back laughing. The rest of them agreed in the well wishes before the whistle blew signaling the end of their break.

They resumed their intense training. Right now focusing on their serves and some indurance training. The coaches were wearing them out today going over and over drills. Soon enough they were in the locker room showering up a bit and changing as they got ready for their lunch break before they’d have to return to practice. The locker room filled with chatter as they discussed different plays they wanted to work on or where they wanted to grab lunch. There conversation was interrupted when one of the coaching assistants poked their head in.

“Miya-San your fiancé is here to see you, she waiting by the gym entrance.” He stated before turning to leave. All eyes were on the setter when he dropped his phone a look of shock present on his face. His mind was going a mile a minute he was so sure he miss heard the man . There was no way you were here. He stood up rushing to finish getting dressed. There was a pressure in the room he was ignoring some of his teammates sharing a confused look.

“I didn’t know you had a Fiancé Tsumu?” Hinata asked excitedly as the team started following behind the setter.

“That’s because he doesn’t,” Sakusa stated bitterly. Atsumu shot a dirty look back at the wing spiker.

“She left him months ago before you joined the team Shoyo-Kun, she’s are really nice girl though always brought us the best snacks when she’d visit,” Bokuto explained his hungry mind straying as he thought back to her delicious cooking.

“Oh I’m sorry Atsumu,” Hinata apologized.

“Don’t he deserved it,” Sakusa scoffed.

The setter paid no mind to comment there was no point in getting angry with the neat freak he was completely right. It didn’t matter at the moment what mattered was seeing you. He stopped in his tracks when he saw you standing there. You were even more beautiful than he remembered. You were looking at your hands picking at your nails. He could see you were nervous. So was he. What was he supposed to say he knew he owed you an apology and much more but it felt like he couldn’t breath looking at you. You looked up at him your eyes locking. There was a look he couldn’t quite pin point. It wasn’t exactly a look of hated which it was what he expected but it also nothing like the looks of love he used to receive. He didn’t even realize the boys had stopped behind him watching the scene. His eyes only focused on you and nothing else.

That is until he hears a sharp breath from behind him as Hinata called out your name. Bokuto and Sakusa’s eyes snapped to the ginger some confusion present. Atsumu however didn’t look away from you not even when you gaze shifted from the setter to his teammate. This look in your eyes he could distinguish. It was one you used to look at him with. It shattered Atsumu as he realized right then you were the woman Hinata had been talking about. It obvious when he saw a similar look of happiness on Shoyo’s face. It felt like a kick to the gut. An array of emotions swirling through his mind. He was hurt to think you moved on. Disgusted as he thought back to his earlier convo with the man and how they had discussed the scratches on his friends back and now realizing how they were from you. He felt like he was going to puke thinking of his teammate with you in that intimate way. But he knew he had no right to feel this way not after all he put you through so he pushed those emotions deep inside. Returning to the moment.

“Hi Sho,” you gave a small smile as you shuffled nervously in your spot.

“I thought we were getting dinner? We can switched to lunch if you need to tho.” He stated.

Sakusa and Bokutos eyes grew wide finally coming to the same conclusion the setter previously had. Sakusa had to stifle a laugh as Bo muttered “oh shit” under his breath at the awkward situation.

“Um actually Shoyo, I’d still like to get dinner with you. I know this must seem really confusing, and I promise to explain everything tonight, but uhh.. I actually here to see Miya-San.” You explain sheepishly.

Atsumu tried not to flinch at the use of his last name.

You turned to the blonde with a stoic face. “Can we get lunch, we really need to talk.” He nodded not knowing how to use his voice.

You turned back to Hinata with a pleasing look. “I’ll call you later before our date, Sho.” Before turning to leave with Tsumu.

Hinata may be beyond confused right now not yet connecting the dots. But that didn’t matter he couldn’t stop his heart from skipping. Date. It’s a date. He wasn’t overthinking or wishing hopefully. It was an actual date with you! The woman he can’t get out of his mind. And that one little comfort was enough for him to trust the situation as he watched you walk away.

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barsformars · 4 years ago

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SOULMATES AU!ATEEZ

req: hiii, idk if you are still accepting requests, but im trying anyways. How about an headcanon of ateez as types of soulmates bonds/ which type of soulmate bond will suit them? Bye have a nice dayyyy

a/n: this one is kinda just like what soulmate aus remind me of them & what i think would wanna write if it was soulmates au and them hehet i hope i interpreted the request properly lmao

ot8 / w.c 1.1k / t.w none

seonghwa

reincarnation soulmates au

look ik everyone has been hyping up the seonghwa's first life thing so it's my turn to talk about it

the soulmate au where one is immortal and the other is mortal

seonghwa is the latter

and you just watch him from afar everytime he reincarnates, only talking to him once he is of age

and isn't the thought of being with him from his first life to his,, maybe 100th life,, just so,,,, bittersweet

bittersweet because damn obviously it hurts everytime he goes

hongjoong

dreaming of your soulmate au

you're in every dream of his and his in yours anytime the two of you are asleep at the same time

dreams with each other in it always feel so warm and fuzzy and you're always having a good time with each other

and sadly, nightmares when the two of you are not together in the dreams

but thing is you always wake up remembering everything except how he looks like and what his name is; same thing goes for him

*cue draw&draw lyrics*

he misses you and he wants to 'draw' you but he doesnt even know who you are physically

yunho

you can hear your soulmates thoughts au

but when you make eye or physical contact, you can't hear those thoughts

so imagine the two of you are seated across each other on the train and the thoughts go like

"omg they have nice shoes"

"why are his hands so pretty"

and those kinda thoughts just keep going and the both of you are just laughing internally at your soulmate because like "honey, im your soulmate, not whoever you're probably drooling over right now"

and then "wait im also drooling over someone else right now,,,"

and then the both of you just decide to lift your heads to meet each other's eyes and suddenly everything is quiet!!!!!!

also imagine later on when youre in a relationship with him and the two of you are just sharing a romantic moment and it's like:

"come on, you have to say it out loud because i can't hear you right now" AND THEN BEING ALL SHY BECAUSE OF THE NON-EXISTENT DISTANCE WHILE SAYING SMTH CHEESY

yeosang

your soulmate’s face is blurry to you au

this can be kinda sad because you will never really know how each other looks

but i think the sweetness lies in that the feelings you have for each other is genuine and purely because of their personality and all

and of course physical attraction is still important to a certain extent but think this:

the both of you are so familiar with each other through touch and a lot of experiences that you just know exactly where his lips are so you can kiss him pretty effortlessly

you know exactly where his nose ends so you know how to tilt your heads when you kiss so as to not bump noses

AND because you just are that familiar with him, you can kind of form a picture of each other's faces in your heads, like you have a rough idea how big his eyes are, how widely spaced, what his eye shape is etc.

idk but that just sounds really beautiful to me despite all the inconveniences that could arise

PLUS its so easy to spot each other in crowds because only one face is blurred to you lmao

san

you have a mark wherever your soulmate first touches you au

you are very disturbed because like half of your body is marked

like so much so that it's definitely not like an accidental bump on the streets or smth

so you're just there thinking "who in the right mind would touch a stranger to this extent and why!"

until one day you're minding your business while walking around and someone runs up from behind you and literally just engulfs you into a hug while resting their head in the crook of your neck

and of course, because you're panicking, you turn your head back to look who the hell it was

AND how coincidentally,,, your lips made contact with their brow bone

he releases you when he realises that you were not the friend he was supposed to meet around here

and because your long sleeves rolled up a little, you see the mark slowing fading away, and it just clicks,, he was the one

"this is truly unfair, i gave you a cute little mark and you give me that big ass mark"

mingi

you see your soulmate's memories when you touch something they have touched before au

and fate is cruel because it always seems like one of you is always a little later than the other

like if you or him walked a little bit faster and reached the same place a little earlier, maybe the two of you would have met

until one day maybe one day mingi is keeping the change after paying at the cashier and he drops some coins

and you're behind him so you help him pick it up and you suddenly get flashes of his memories

and so does he when you hand the coins back to him

fate is so stupid sometimes but it's cute ig

wooyoung

whatever you write on your skin shows up on your soulmate's skin as well

and wooyoung being wooyoung, loves to share things that makes him happy and things that he wish you would try out as well

and so you can expect his own food recipes, or maybe some lyrics that he's been trying to write, or like ideas for his vlogs and all

let's be real, it's 2021, the two of you could really just share social media handles and meet irl easily but both of you just love the comfort of anonymity

and knowing that someone out there is always listening, or rather, reading, whatever you want to say

jongho

when your soulmate gets hurt, flowers bloom at the same exact location

i think this one's kinda cute even tho it can be scary at times i guess

like imagine both of you just wanting to bubble wrap each other up because

"I HAVE A PERFORMANCE TOMORROW YOU CAN'T GET HURT"

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN ONE OF YOUR BUTT CHEEKS IS BLEEDING, HOW AM I GOING TO SIT NOW"

STOP BITING YOUR LIPS I DONT WANT FLOWERS ON MY LIPS"

i think it is the beauty of taking care of someone as much as you would take care of yourself or reversely, taking care of yourself as much as you wanna take care of someone else

#kwritersworldnet #kdiarynet #8makes1teamnet #ateezlovenet #ficscafe #ateez headcanons #ateez scenarios #ateez reactions #ateez imagines #ateez writings #ateez blurbs #ateez drabbles #ateez #ateez fluff #ateez angst #ateez soulmate au #requested #ateez ot8

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un2-verse · 4 years ago

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BILLY — Kim Taehyung (1)

》 News of a Sadistic Serial Killer nicknamed “Jigsaw” is spreading around town like wildfire… the nickname stemming from the puzzle piece he cuts from every victim’s body. No one knows who he’ll trap next but in a town full of delinquents and criminals, it could never be you. Right? 《

pairings: john kramer!taehyung x female reader

warnings: dark themes, angst, yandere, murder, torture, self harm, suicide, stalking etc.... (will add more when i know lol) although it is rather innocent in the first couple chapters(?) so idk it could be slow burn but i guess we’ll find out as i write it >< ,, it’s my version of saw if saw was a fucked up love story lol. Please don’t read if any of the topics mentioned trigger you!! 18+

this fic is exactly that, fiction!!!! the au does not represent the characters mentioned irl......

synopsis: you end up lost on the other side of town, where you cross paths with a handsome stranger, kim taehyung, only.... are you a stranger to him?

[a/n: daffodils represent; love me, sympathy, desire and affection returned...]

word count: 3k

series masterlist

part two

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Hiding behind a mask was something you were accustomed to. Your friend group and family were clueless to the torment you endured from simply existing. You were confident your masking had convinced the world you were happy with yourself. Unbeknown to you, one other person saw straight through your façade.

You wanted to end your life.

He needed you to cherish your life.

Nothing looked familiar. The café you frequented was nowhere to be found. Your usual hangout was most definitely not on the side of town you found yourself in. You felt anxiety slowly curl its way around your body, you were frigid. You tried and tried but couldn’t find it in yourself to run.

You lived in the more friendly part of town (so to speak) – where houses were colourful, gardens pristine, warm-hearted neighbours who would treat you like family and white picket fences are what surrounded you. That was your norm, sure, you weren’t exactly loaded but you weren’t exactly poor either. It was a healthy balance in the middle. That’s not to say you hadn’t lived or seen this side of town before.

Your Mother and Father had grown up on this side of the fence. Two young people brought up in the rougher, more unfortunate areas. Your Mother was tough; she looked like a naïve, weak girl, albeit that was not the case. She was strong willed, used to life on the streets and doing anything she could to get money to make sure there was at least some food on the table. While your Mum was the leader, your Dad was more of a sheep. He was easily influenced and was dragged into the wrong crowd (had his fair share with drugs and street racing). That was their life for a few years till they crossed paths and your Mum helped your Dad get back on the right track.

They didn��t tell you much about their childhood and adolescence but they told you enough to make you appreciate what you have and to always work hard for it. To stick with the right people, be wise and conscious of your decisions. Be kind to those around you.

Your family owned a garage; your Dad was the head mechanic. This was the sole reason you were here. You knew it wouldn’t be simple when you agreed to go to this side of town to get a few bits for your Father’s shop. However, you didn’t expect it to be this difficult. How could you be so stupid? Why didn’t you just ask Hoseok and Yoongi to come with you like your father told you to? Or at least tell them where you were… yet you decided today of all days to be stubborn and venture on yourself, knowing full well how unsafe the area was. There were rundown businesses on either side of the road, beggars at every doorstep; drug dealings happening in broad daylight, no one even trying to hide it.

You felt your phone buzz in your pocket, you took it out and sighed a breath of relief once you’d read the texts.

14:37— From Papa: U ok munchkin ??? Did u get the stuff ?

14:39— From Papa: its ok if u didnt. Yoongs rang said hes got majority this morning lol so be safe n get home soon . Love u

14:40— To Papa: ohhh ok pops, i couldn’t find the shop anyway lol i’ll head back soon, love u too x

*LOW BATTERY*

“Fuck, trust me to forget to charge the bastard.” You rolled your eyes as you stuffed the phone back in your pocket.

Muffled shouting was heard around you. People ran across the street, bumping into you as they ran past. You gathered yourself and moved further down the path. “Great!” you exasperated, “honestly I’m so fucking stupid! Yoongi’s gonna kill me for this, I knew, I knew I should’ve told him I was coming over here but no,” your head was hung low as you dragged your feet across the pavement, “maybe I could tell Hobi, he wouldn’t be as angry right? I’m sure he’ll come,“ A sudden scream ripped you out of your chuntering. You whipped your head to the right, you could make out some figures bustling about in front of you, a group of men were quite clearly fighting… your anxiety struck you and you held your breath as you saw a man pull a knife from the waistband of his sweatpants. All thoughts and common sense seemed to leave all at once. Statue like, feet stuck to the ground. You watched on as the group rushed towards the brown haired man, you scanned his figure: tall, broad, confident… he exuded an intimidating aura even when you were this far away from him.

How could someone be so sure of themselves? It was one against five, surely the loner had no chance?

The glistening of the knife brought you back to your senses. Fucking hell. How do you always end up in these situations when you’re alone? Why me? Why? Good Lord, I need to run. Just as you were about to leave, the group who were arguing charged past you; one gripped his side as another supported his weight. Holy fuck, did he stab him? you stood frozen, yet again, your mind raced a mile a minute. Panic bubbled in your chest.

“You okay there Doll?” His voice was deep, velvet-like. It flowed so smoothly you doubted it was real, it was so soothing like it had wrapped itself around you, embracing your body. You heard his footsteps before he planted himself beside you. His shoulder reached the top of your head, his hand brushed yours. Swallowing your nerves you dared a glance up. He was fucking breath-taking, like a fallen angel. The stranger shot you a small smile that you would’ve easily missed had you not been staring at his features… a blush crept up your neck as you nodded. His smile slowly twisted into a smirk.

Cute, Taehyung thought to himself. Couldn’t help but adore the way you slightly trembled under his gaze, the way your hands gripped and twisted your sweater paws. Almost like a puppy. He cleared his throat and reached his hand to yours, “Sorry, I should’ve introduced myself. I’m Taehyung.” you took his hand into yours, apprehensively you greeted him, “I’m Y/N.”

“Ah, Y/N. I haven’t seen you round here before, you new or something?” Taehyung cocked his head to the side, his eyes seemed to stare right through you.

“Uhm, I don’t live here. I live over the other part of Town… I was just grabbing some stuff for my Dad but, my phones about to die. I have no idea where I am or how to get home, I’m sorry, I promise I didn’t see anything!” a deep chuckle cut you off, Taehyung smiled and beckoned you to follow him.

“Come on Y/N, you’re not suited for this side of Town, I’ll walk you back. A pretty little thing like you, you’re easy prey to these guys.” your feet fell into a cautious pace behind him, he glanced over his shoulder, “hurry up Buttercup, I don’t bite.” Taehyung flashed a boxy grin in your direction, which caused you to speed up ever so slightly.

You were unsure how you felt about letting a complete stranger walk you home, Yoongi would definitely kill you for this. Especially with the recent news of some serial killer named ‘Jigsaw’, Yoongi and Hoseok had been very stern and their usual, overprotective selves when the news had broken out. “It’s on every headline Y/Nie! No more leaving the house on yourself, you need to go anywhere you ring either of us. Got it? Don’t talk to anyone you don’t know either. There’s some dodgy fucks about recently.” Although, you loved them dearly, sometimes their protectiveness was a...little overbearing. You already felt suffocated from your parents (you didn’t need it from your best friends as well). They were happy and believed you to be too; but that was exhausting, faking happiness. You had a constant façade, acted like a happy normal teenager with a happy family; when that was far from the truth.

Drowning. That’s how you’d explain the way you felt. Breathing was difficult and brought you more pain than it was worth. Growing up was tedious, you had grown differently to your peers which only brought ridicule and embarrassment for you. You had struggled with your speech (sometimes you still do), you often stuttered, mispronounced words, the list was endless. That was one of the first reasons you were a castaway. As you grew, the ridicule worsened. Verbal abuse turned physical from your classmates. They made you feel like you were a waste of space. The names they called you, you soon started to believe them. Ugly. Weird. Freak. Stupid. They took root in your brain, slowly they grew and grew till your head was overgrown with twisted, rotten weeds.

Eventually, you sought comfort in blood. You didn’t care that it hurt you; you were almost happy to feel pain. Like you deserved to.

By age 14, you had started to skip school. Only ever there for exams and a couple of art classes you had with Jeongguk. He was what you would’ve called a best friend, he supported you and was by your side till you left school. He went away to college and like always with school friends, you drifted apart. Nevertheless, he still texts you now and then to check in.

Although you were (once) close with Jeongguk. He never knew of your inner demons, the same with Yoongi and Hoseok. You didn’t want to feel like a burden and worry your friends when they had shit to worry about themselves.

Why devastate flowers that flourish beautifully with weeds that manage to twist their way around every crack?

You had walked for a few minutes now, having chatted absentmindedly about anything and everything. The roads still didn’t look familiar to you and you just wished they did, you didn’t want to be away from your home any longer, your feet were starting to ache, your phone was on 10% battery and it was fucking cold. You just wanted to be back in bed tucked up watching Lady and the Tramp or 101 Dalmatians for the millionth time. You felt safe and content when you indulged in your comfort films. Far away from the real world and wrapped up in the false reality. They easily distracted you and that's when you truly felt at peace. Your mind was always too busy thinking about how cute it was when Tramp calls Lady, Pidge or how in love Pongo and Perdy were.

Majority of the time you fantasised about having a love similar, but then again, why would you wanna make yourself vulnerable like that? Is the risk of being hurt (more than you are now) any good? Of course it’s not. Fuck that, life isn’t nothing like those shitty romance films or novels… It’s real and painful.

As you and Taehyung rounded the corner, a little cafe caught your eye, a dainty blue and pink building. Fairy Lights strung up around the windows, you could see a handful of people inside, busy sipping their drinks and chatting away to one another. ‘Aroma Mocha’ hung above the doors. It looked so cute and simple. Your previous thoughts left your mind as quick as they had come. You wanted to go inside, it had an enticing atmosphere.

Taehyung hadn’t realised you’d stopped walking until he couldn’t hear the soft thud of your footsteps behind him, he turned as he called out to you, your eyes still fixed on the cafe. He chuckled to himself, “Fucking adorable, like a kid at christmas,” he walked back over to you. “Hey Doll, you wanna go in?” He felt his heart quicken when you looked at him with those pretty eyes, “We’ve plenty of time to get you back before it’s dark angel.” You answered him with a nod as you turned your head from Taehyung to look back at the alluring little cafe.

Not a second had passed before Taehyung grabbed your hand and pulled you across the road to the entrance; you ignored the warmth of his hand as it intertwined with yours; you ignored the way your tummy erupted with butterflies. Taehyung had stopped to hold the door for you, you murmured a small, “thank you,” looking up at him, the heat that crept up your cheeks making your face resemble that of a doll’s he thought to himself. Once he ushered you fully inside, he placed his hand to rest on the curve of your waist as he guided you to the back corner of the room, where a quaint table for two was unoccupied, a little pot of Daffodils sat atop. How fitting...

Taehyung was quick to pull the chair out for you to take a seat, you pulled it in as you sat down and sent a shy smile his way, “I’m sorry, I know we just met Taehyung but this place is so fucking precious! I hope I’m not bothering you, if I am we can just carry on walking or, I could ring a Taxi? Is this weird? Oh god, I can’t believe--”, Taehyung threw his head back as he laughed, a sound that seemed to wrap its way around your soul, twisting around your heart in the nicest of ways, it was almost like a killer to the weeds taking over your body. A temporary release. You felt like you could really breathe in those short seconds of his laughter.

“Angel, if you were bothering me, I’d have kept on walking. That, or I would’ve called you a Taxi myself, it’s no problem honestly.” You ducked your head as he sent a wink your way, fuck sake Y/N get it together! Why are you acting like a fucking schoolgirl?

“Well I uh, appreciate it so, yeah thank you?” You don’t know what to do, you’re here with the most gorgeous person you’ve ever laid your eyes on… yet you have no clue if what you saw was real, did Taehyung stab someone? Could someone have had the knife who wasn’t Taehyung? Was he even the person you saw in that altercation? Did you imagine everything that had gone off?

Before you had chance to overthink it, a light bubbly voice greeted your ears, “Hi! Welcome to Aroma Mocha, I’m Jimin and I’ll be your server today. Is there anything I can get you?” Jimin held his gaze on you as he flashed you a friendly smile, Taehyung turned around at the sound of his best friend, “Oh, Tae! I wasn’t expecting to see you today, what are you doing here? And who’s this pretty little lady?”

“This is Y/Nie, she was in the neighbourhood so we thought we’d nip in for something to drink before I take her back to hers.” you sent a warm smile to Jimin which he gladly returned, “I’ll have my usual and can you get Y/Nie a Strawberry Iced Tea? Thanks man.”

Once Jimin had disappeared to make your drinks, you shot your eyes to Taehyung, “Uhm, how’d you know I like Strawberry Iced Tea?” Taehyung didn’t even look in your direction as he scrolled through his phone, eyes glued to the screen. A minute passed by and he’d still not acknowledged your question so you let it slide, it wasn’t that big of a deal right? Your mind drifted. Your fingers rested atop of your lap, hidden from the sight of onlookers, picking around your nails as anxiety flooded your body. You felt like you were about to suffocate. You shouldn’t be talking to anyone, you shouldn’t let anyone close. You were only going to fuck everything up in a heartbeat. It’s only natural. Self deprecating thoughts devoured and made their way through your veins, poisoning yourself further; your whole body felt as though it was alight.

Jimin brought you your drinks, placed them carefully in front of the pair of you as you both said your thanks.

The click of Taehyung’s phone being locked and the clearing of his throat brought you back to your senses. “The drink I ordered for you is popular here so, I assumed you’d like to try it. You wanna talk about what’s bothering you?” your eyes shot up to meet his, your head tilted a little to the left as your tongue wet your lip, so puppy like...

You stared incredulously, “I don’t know what you’re talking about Taehyung.” You leant forward slightly as you wrapped your lips around the straw and took a sip.

Taehyung saw the way you sucked your drink up through your straw, his eyes darkened. Thankful to have worn sweatpants that day, he shifted himself discreetly, “I’m not stupid Angel, I know what you’re doing under the table. I’m here, so talk to me. I’ll listen to whatever you gotta say.”

You stuttered as you wracked your brain for something to say, “I-I only met you like forty minutes ago, I don’t even tell my friends what’s wrong. Not that there is, everything’s fine.”

You met me just short of an hour ago, he thought to himself, “You don’t have to lie to me Y/Nie…” he grabbed your hands that were laid near the cup of your Iced Tea. His thumb rubbing circles onto the back of your hand. You looked small and fragile, like the Daffodils on the table; one little pluck and you’d be ruined. He wouldn’t admit it to you just yet but, Taehyung fucking loved how delicate you seemed as you sat across from him.

How easy it would be to take your life away. How easy it’d be to pull those weeds up that are poisoning you, torturing you every single day. He shook his head, as he cleared those thoughts. No, only Y/N can make that decision. I’m just going to help her choose.

Live or Die.

You visibly winced, “You don’t know me. Think whatever the fuck you want about me, it doesn’t matter.” your eyes flashed hurt as you went back to picking your skin. You knew it, this whole encounter was too good to be true. A complete stranger (well acquaintance technically) had just presumed shit about you, the fact he was right is what hurt more. You didn’t want anyone to know how you were feeling. Or how you were dealing with it.

You couldn’t exactly tell him to piss off, you still needed his help home and so you tried to distract yourself from the unsettling gaze that watched your every move. You let out a breath as Taehyung went back to his phone. Your eyes drifted as you picked up the local Newspaper, your eyes skimmed over the headline, ‘Jigsaw Traps Continue’. Taehyung noticed you staring at the front page, and chuckled, “you scared of Jigsaw Angel?”

You shook your head, why would you be scared of some nutjob who’s targeted criminals and drug dealers? You’re a nobody. “Of some psychopathic puppet?” if anyone did anything to you that would threaten your life, it would be you. Taehyung just laughed in return as you skipped the article and skim-read the other pointless stories.

You were fucking clueless as to who he was while he knew every little thing about you. He had watched you for months… His precious little Y/Nie… Oh how silly you were, taking your life for granted.

You hated yourself that much, you were willingly marking yourself up. Tainting your skin… oh your skin, how fucking beautiful and soft it looked, even with all the scars it still looked perfect… Taehyung wanted nothing more than to whisk you away and lock you inside with him. Forever. He didn’t want anyone touching what was his.

He knew you wore a mask when in public, too afraid to show your real self. Little did you know, he wore a mask himself...only he wore it to better other people.

He had a plan.

And you’d soon find out.

Let the games begin.

385 notes · View notes

4aloysius-porteu · 4 years ago

Text

i am your ally || tsukishima kei.

pairing; tsukishima kei x f! reader

genre: oneshot, drama, flangst, a little comedy

word count: 5.6k

details: 3rd year Tsukishima, artist reader

warnings: reader going missing, verbal abuse, crushing of dreams, lots of sadness, heavy parental argument, everything that happens here hits home

synopsis: tsukishima didnt know what is the right thing to say after he heard of (y/n)’s situation, but the words that stumbled out from his mouth were a surprise, yet it blossomed to a meaningful talk that happens once in a blue moon.

(a/n): wrote in the middle of my depressing days to find a little comfort from this character that I love with all my heart. inspired by true situations irl; if you, my friend, is feeling down today, i hope reading this work of mine can help. i might make this into a full story if this got enough attention tho.

(Y/N) was nowhere to be found.

It wasn't Tsukishima's habit to eavesdrop on other people's conversation, but he couldn't help but listen when he heard her name from her classmates. She was a consistent top student that will never neglect her studies, so it was unusual to know that she was absent today. He thought that maybe she got sick or she decided to go crazy and skip school. If it was the latter, he hoped that she knows what she's doing, because midterms are coming in 3 days, and he's not going to listen to her whines and begs to help her study for the tests.

And now he just happened to overhear that she was missing.

He saw her parents walk out of the campus after talking to the vice-principal and to the teachers. Gossip filled the corridors and rooms. Tsukishima went back to his room, clearly annoyed with the unnecessary noise.

He listened to the lectures of each subject and continued to write down important points, but the thought of (Y/N) lingered in his head. What could've happened that led to her disappearance? Was she kidnapped? No, he just walked her home last night and she'll never leave her place past midnight. Kidnappers won't dare to make a move in daylight because of the town's high authority visibility. There's no way she'll be lost in an area she's very familiar with.

She ran away from home. That is the only logical possibility he could come up with, but he couldn't think of an idea as to why. (Y/N), who loves to be cooped up in her room with music blaring in her earphones while drawing, left her home without a trace. Tsukishima was a little worried, but he won't let his face show whatever the hell he's feeling.

His plays and blocks aren't exactly bad, but Yamaguchi could sense that Tsukishima was thinking of something other than the volleyball practice. He approached his friend who was resting on the floor, his long arms covering his curled up legs.

"Tsukki, what's with that expression? Did you get a failing score in a quiz?" Yamaguchi started, in an attempt to lighten up the atmosphere.

The blonde's eyes darted to him, "Like hell, I'm going to let that happen. What do you want?"

He shrugged, "Nothing, I just noticed that you were a little quieter and more passive today. Normally, you would've chewed the first years out with their simple blocking errors, but you didn't say a thing. You're scarier in their eyes when you're silent."

"I was tired. I'll only waste my voice pointing out something I did a million times." A sigh escaped his lips

"Right..." Yamaguchi paused, "So, I assume you have heard?"

"Heard of what?"

"That (Y/N) is missing."

"Oh," A frown fell on his features. It wasn't his usual frown. People who really know him would notice that his eyes are full of worry.

He sat beside Tsukishima before he spoke again. "I know you have ideas on places (Y/N) could've gone to."

"I do not know what you're talking about."

The latter chuckled, "Oh, humor me, Tsukki. If you're that worried, I can excuse you for today's practice. No problem."

"Does that mean that you aren't concerned?"

"I am concerned. I want to look for her as well, but I have to whip the other players into shape. I'm sorry if I couldn't accompany you right away."

Tsukishima stood up and sighed again, "You will excuse me, you said?"

"Yeah."

There were silence and the background noise of balls and shoes colliding on the floor. He wiped the sweat off his face before replying, "I'll be leaving the gym in a few minutes."

He changed his clothes and packed his things up, causing the team to exchange glances.

"Tsukki!" Yamaguchi called, throwing his friend's large jacket to him, which the other caught. "Take care! I hope you find (Y/N) and get her home safe."

"I wish. Then, I'll leave it to you, Captain."

The green-haired middle blocker's eyes teared up and sparkled as he beamed a smile back, "I got it!"

Tsukishima started to look for (Y/N) at the places she liked to go to; the art store, the Central Park, the kid's playground, the museum, and the prefectural library. But there was no sign of her anywhere. He looked at the nearby places to no avail. He walked on while dialing her number, but her phone is out of coverage area. He spent 3 more hours finding the girl and soon received a message from Yamaguchi, telling him that (Y/N) hasn't been found yet and that he joined the authorities to help them find her.

He walked back to the direction of his home, panting softly. He had failed to find (Y/N), yet his brain won't stop thinking about her possible whereabouts. The cool breeze of winter hit Tsukishima's face and shivered at the contact. He had hoped again that she is inside of an establishment, safe from such cold weather.

Tsukishima's home has its lights out. Her mother was invited into her colleagues' reunion as said in her text, and both his father and brother are busy at work. He reached for his key in his pocket and was opening the door, not until he heard a loud sob from somewhere. Tsukishima looked around the place as the sobbing continued. He searched for the source and ended up in their backyard. He caught the sight of a small figure behind the bushes and went closer to confirm.

It was a cat. It had scurried away once he got close to it. Oh, how stupid he is to get his hopes up only to find a scared animal. But he was certain he heard a sob somewhere near. And cats aren't capable of making a sound like that. Or maybe he was only hearing things?

He dragged his feet to the main door to unlock it, but this time, there was a loud noise of scrubbing on the roof. What is it this time? He moved back and looked upon where it came from.

To his surprise, it wasn't another cat but a person. Their legs were curled up, arms covered around them, with their chin on their knees. Tsukishima turned on his phone's flashlight and there she was.

It was (Y/N). Her shoulders shook, either from the cold or trying her best not to cry out loud.

"H-Help me."

He stared at the girl, confused and fighting back laughter because of how scared (Y/N) looked. "How the heck did you get in there?"

"I climbed that tree and jumped off to break in and hide in your room. Turned out that the windows are locked. I don't know how to jump back and I-I was too high from the ground. You know I'm scared of heights! Why did you lock the window?! Stupid!"

"Of course, I would lock the window for the security. And wow, aren't you the stupid one for knowing how to climb and jump up to my window and not knowing how to get down? Why did you climb if you are scared of heights? Such an idiot."

"Fine, fine. I am an idiot. Now, can you help me get off this roof?"

He crossed his arms and smirked, "No."

"Ugh! Please, Kei. I've been trapped here for hours. I am begging you to help me get down. Please?"

He sighed in defeat and raised his arms. "Here. Jump."

For seconds, (Y/N) didn't respond as she was having second thoughts about jumping.

"What? Do you expect me to get a ladder? I'm sorry, but it's in the basement, broken." He said in a mocking tone. "Don't you want to come down?"

"Can you catch me properly? Are your arms stable? Won't you fall on your ass?" (Y/N) interrogated.

Tsukishima rolled his eyes, "Alright, stay there and freeze to death."

"No, wait! I was just asking! Come back! Don't leave meeee!"

The blonde looked up to her and raised his arms again, "Don't think. Trust me, I will catch you properly and you won't crash to the ground. You weigh like nothing anyway."

"Are you talking about yourself?" She retorted, pertaining to his weight.

"Can you please just jump?"

(Y/N) inhaled and went to the edge of the roof. It was a scary view for her, just looking down makes her dizzy, and want to throw up. She thought he would have the largest frown on his face because of how irritatingly slow she was, but there was Tsukishima waiting for her with the calmest expression. She smiled a little.

"Here I go..."

She took off, closing her eyes, and swallowing her fears. The gravity pulled her feet down shortly after, and Tsukishima readied himself for the impact as he reached her waist. He held on to her lower torso while (Y/N) placed her arms around his shoulders tightly and legs on his waist. The athlete's balance slightly went off, so he took a step back to support both their weights. It was now steady.

"I'm surprised you didn't lose your balance. Where's the weak boned beanpole 3 years ago?"

"I did for a second."

"Doesn't matter. You caught me. Thank you."

They had stayed in that way for a moment until Tsukishima spoke, "Do you plan to get off?"

"No. I'm tired."

"I am too." Yet she refused to let go.

He exhaled, carrying (Y/N) to the main entrance and finally unlocking the door. Her hoodie was cold and some parts are wet, but it didn't rain on that day. He took her in and placed her on the couch. Tsukishima went to his room, changed clothes, and brought a spare sweatshirt, handkerchief, and a towel. He went down but didn't find (Y/N) where he left her, so he walked to the kitchen counter and found the girl on the corner, shivering like a pup.

He tossed the clothing at her without further words. There was a note from her mom beside the curry in the table, saying she had eaten and she left rolls in the refrigerator. He was about to turn on the stove to reheat the food his mother left, but his eyes landed on (Y/N) who sat quietly, hugging the sweatshirt instead of wearing it. Her hair was disheveled, the sleeves and neck part of her hoodie was damp, her nose was red and her puffy, bloodshot eyes implied that she has been crying for who knows how long. He set the pan down to get her a glass of water.

"Everyone was looking for you." Said Tsukishima.

"No one was really looking for me." (Y/N) replied, clearing her nose.

"I didn't spend the last 3 hours tiring myself to scan the whole town for no reason." He sat beside her, handing the glass. "Care to spill the tea?"

(Y/N) drank first before speaking weakly, "I hate them. So much."

The male remained quiet, waiting for her to continue her dilemma.

"Remember when I told you and the class that I will be the most successful doctor in Japan after I finished my studies? It was a lie. It wasn't my dream to stay in a hospital and treat ill people, I only wanted to draw and paint. I didn't care if it never made them or anyone happy, I am happy doing it. And they are taking it away from me."

He knew from the start that her dream job as a doctor wasn't true. For years she stayed close to him as a friend or more, she won't blabber anything of the medical topic. She was terrified of syringes. He saw her reading an article about surgeries and like, but her focus was easily taken away.

She will get a pencil then start scribbling and drawing. Something that Tsukishima always sees her doing whenever she has a pen and paper, but she insists that it was a mere hobby. Her notebooks are well designed and organized, but the back is always full of artistic doodles instead of algebra solutions. She only has very few art materials yet she can make a portrait with only her fingers to shade. She makes digital art without a stylus. She would drag him to the museum after class to view some western and eastern paintings or any work of art while he admires the dinosaur fossils. For times she's watching an art tutorial and talk about art, draw and paint, she has those stupid sparkles in her eyes and a huge smile on her face.

"You know Tsukishima, after I finish studying and became a doctor, I'll become an artist and if the time let's it, I'll open my own art gallery. That's my ultimate dream." She looked alive and delighted.

Very much the opposite of what she looks like right now.

Even though she was a slave of art, as Tsukishima was a slave of his own interests, (Y/N) prioritized her studies so much. He understood why when he went to her house and met her parents before their study sessions. He had noticed everything but chose to stay quiet.

"I-I was drawing last night. Dad entered my room but I didn't notice so he ripped the music away from my ears and yelled. He said that I would always lock myself in my room and draw every night. It was never-ending and irritates the shit out of him. He asked why would I do something so useless that isn't even connected to any academic subject. He was looking down on my art like he was looking at a piece of crap. He told me to stop and threatened me if I didn't. Why would I get punished for drawing? I couldn't get myself to stay silent so I retorted. If he doesn't want to see me drawing, then he shouldn't enter my room at all. He should stop meddling with my hobbies. His anger only went up."

(Y/N) stopped for a while to wipe her tears and snot with her sleeves but Tsukishima placed a handkerchief on her hands. She muttered her thanks and blew her nose and soon followed with a sneeze.

"Soon, it became a full-blown argument. He said that he was checking out if I was doing my projects, but oh he was so disappointed only to find his daughter drawing for nothing. What the heck? I gave them the best grades I could get, and part of it was because of you, Tsukishima, but they still aren't satisfied? I balanced drawing and academics, but they made it seem that all I was doing was my hobby, completely ignoring my efforts at school. I finished the school activities and I reviewed for midterms and all I want is to be left alone and draw. What, they want me to go crazy by studying every hour with things I won't even apply in real life?"

Her fake laughter echoed in the kitchen for seconds before her depressed tone took over again.

"Mom heard all the shouting and joined the argument. Of course, she sided with dad without listening to my feelings and there they ridiculed their youngest child's interests and talent. They told me that everything I do is bullshit and wrong, that I was useless, that I was the huge opposite of their expectations, and... and how come God gave them a joke. She said they raised me so that I could help them, not to do such useless things. It hurts to shout back but I did to explain why I'm so passionate about art in hopes that they will listen and understand but, I was so wrong. I was suddenly slapped..." She placed her hand to her left cheek, her lips quivered a little.

"I-It stung so much. Mom complained about how the Internet generation is so rebellious and won't listen to the elders. They didn't raise and teach me to talk back at them, but here is their child being a bitch. They started comparing me to my elder siblings or relatives who focused on their studies and who are at the door of success. I know they only want me to achieve the best, but my success isn't up to them! It's on me!! And I've invested a lot for that! They shouted at me as mom pulled my hair. It was so loud I thought I was going deaf. Dad blamed the gadget's influence and my drawings. I have only drawn decent fanarts of fictional characters, people, and sceneries, but they believed that because of these, I turned into a mannerless bastard. So mom decided to get my phone and lessen my allowance so that I wouldn't buy any art materials that are a waste of fortune--"

She bit her lower lip that is trembling uncontrollably and her eyesight blurred as her fat tears got in the way.

"and... D-Dad... he... he... he tore m-my sketch pad apart..."

Tsukishima's eyes widened. (Y/N) brought that thing with her almost everywhere she went and it was filled with good drawings and art plans. She has a lot of them though, but Tsukishima could only imagine how she felt when her efforts were trampled over by someone important to her.

(Y/N) broke down, bawled her eyes out, and shrieked hysterically. He looked at her with a heavy heart. He had seen her crying sometimes, be it because of a sad movie or empathy, but never like this. A depressed, emotional wreck. Her eyes were sore enough after a lot of hours, but she won't stop crying. It was heartbreaking to see and hear his significant other in this state, yet Tsukishima didn't know what is the right thing to say.

But maybe there was no need to say anything at all.

Kei wrapped his arms around her weeping figure and pulled her towards him. Cry it out, pipsqueak. (Y/N) didn't expect this action, nonetheless cried in his shoulder He didn't care anymore if this meant he gets his clothes drenched in her snot and tears as long as she felt a little less lonely. He rubbed her back and hair in an attempt to comfort his lover. (Y/N)'s airways hurt, but she screamed the pain out, in hopes that the pain in her heart would vanish. Her weeping went on for long minutes until she choked in her own sobs that Tsukishima had to get her another glass of water.

"Tell me, Kei." She began, wiping her eyes, "Is there... something wrong with me? Is my dream really that insignificant?"

"There's nothing wrong with you. You followed your ideals. Anyone including me would've done the same." He answered beside her.

"I-It's realistic, right?"

"It is."

"Then... why did it turn out like this?" Her voice was cracking.

Tsukishima looked down, "The society is just very cruel."

"Yeah. It sure is. Such a cruel society to live with."

(Y/N) let out a dejected sigh and leaned on Tsukki's shoulder. "I couldn't look at them without such overwhelming fear and hate anymore. I wonder if... they knew that I was doing this for them. I'd like to make them smile with something I've made myself. Once, I made each of them a portrait. A realistic one made from a pencil. I couldn't afford a material set that can be used to paint realistically, but I tried my best to impress them with a charcoal one. Oh, if only you saw their faces when I gave them the portraits. They returned a half-hearted smile. It wasn't the same kind of joy I see whenever I give them perfect scores on tests. I didn't spend 3 sleepless nights just to see their half happy, half unpleased reaction. I wish they could feel more proud of their daughter who worked hard for them... I wonder if they threw it away as he did on my sketch pad..."

They let silence engulf the atmosphere for a while. (Y/N) had calmed down a little, despite shedding smaller tears from the side of her eyes. Tsukishima held the sweatshirt he gave her earlier to make her wear it on the top of her hoodie to lessen her shivering. He stared at her, while the other gazed down on the floor with dead eyes.

Tsukishima asked, "So, what are you going to do now?"

"What am I going to do now huh..." (Y/N) repeated. "I'll probably... put everything to an end."

"You know I won't let you."

"I'm not talking about my life, silly. I might stop drawing and all. I've lost it."

"Isn't your life and drawing one and the same? And I'm pretty sure you have that immense talent to continue."

"No... Besides, talent isn't a talent if it doesn't make anyone happy."

The blonde mentally scoffed. She just said that it makes her happy in the beginning.

"Oh? Fine, stop doing that one thing you put everything into. What would that girl you received a commission from would feel if she were to hear you though?"

(Y/N) was stunned. She had completely forgotten about the whole commission thing she opened in her social media accounts. Tsukishima accompanied (Y/N) on giving the commissioned charcoal portrait to a girl last 3 weeks ago. It was (Y/N)'s first commission for years she's making art. Someone liked her work for the first time and paid for it, and her client looks very contented and glad. The words she said filled her thoughts with inspiration.

"Wow, this is awesome! I'm so happy!! Thank you for making this, it was exactly what I've pictured on my mind! You're amazing! All the excitement I've bottled up for this day is so worth it," The girl, probably a little older than them paused and admired the painting she received from (Y/N).

"Would you ignore those words she said?"

'Please don't stop drawing, I'll be looking forward to your future works!'

A pang of guilt hit her chest. She wants to pursue art, but there are these shackles and chains on her limbs and around her neck that made it hard for her to move forward. She couldn't breathe. What happened yesterday night was too much. Her parents went overboard.

"B-But—"

A monotone voice interrupted her, "Don't. Never stop striving for something you have been building for years. You might be defeated now, but surely, you will win some time. There's no way you'll stay in the lowest level of the ladder after I saw how hard you worked. You will go to nationals again, and I will continue to support you. I'll cheer for you and stay by your side! So please, do not stop! Let me see those beautiful blocks that you execute in the game once more! And I will watch you reach the top! Doesn't matter how many times, I'll never get weary of watching you do amazing things!"

She was silenced by that statement. She had definitely heard those before, but couldn't quite remember where.

"Does the sentiment seem familiar to you? Those are the same words that came from your mouth when I was planning to quit volleyball after our huge loss to Date Tech last year. I am returning them back to you."

"Huh?" She replied with a meek voice.

"That time, you really did a good job meddling with my decisions. It annoyed me first, but what you had stated held a weight that I couldn't disregard. You gave me the small push I didn't know I needed. In the end, I'd like to pay you back." Tsukishima stated with a far away look in his eyes.

(Y/N) listened with watery eyes. This Tsukishima's side isn't definitely the one she gets to see every day so she couldn't feel anything but the warm, fuzzy feeling that is healing her heart.

"It's probably selfish for me to say this but, don't you dare give up. I didn't stop. No matter how long and hard the game is, no matter how tired and discouraged I get, and no matter how many pessimistic thoughts clouded my head, I didn't stop chasing after a falling ball and thinking of another tactic to counter the enemy. I kept your words with me in court. It was you who told me not to in the first place, and I'm not going to forgive you if you ever dropped everything. I won't let the stupid, starry-eyed (Y/N) die today."

The girl beside her started sobbing. "But you told me once that my drawing are ugly."

"Oh. That. I... kind of remember that. I'm not sorry about what I said because I did it to provoke and rile you up. It was a lie though. As someone who always sees you drawing, I can't call your work ugly at all. Your art is... astounding. You make it look like it's so easy to do. I think you forgot next sentence after I told you that."

"What was the sentence after?"

Tsukishima sighed, "I told you to keep doing it, right?"

The sound of (Y/N) crying engulfed the kitchen, "Oh gosh, why did I forget that... I'm sorry, I'm so idiotic..."

The blonde brought her back to his arms, "Will you stop crying, you've been too hard on yourself today,"

(Y/N) hid her face on his chest, muffling her speech, "c-couldn't help it... my mind is such a mess... I do not know..." She paused, coughing. "It's no use if m-my parents don't acknowledge me..."

"Hundreds, or perhaps thousands of people who follow you on social media account recognize you. People in school recognizes you. I recognize you. I am your ally. Isn't that enough reason for you to get back on your feet? I will support you just like how you supported me. You have a lot of people who admire you, but I only have a few people and you. Yet your words are enough. I'm certain that soon, you will reach your parents' standards and get them to acknowledge you. It's not impossible."

(Y/N) fixed her tear-stained face before looking up to him, "You know what? Who are you? Is a good spirit possessing your body? The Kei I know will either stay quiet or laugh at me for being pathetic."

"I was trying to be nice for once and this is what I get?" He frowned.

(Y/N) chuckled and hugged Tsukishima, "I'm sorry. Everything you said meant the world to me. Thank you very much."

She relaxed against his lean body, "I have a question though..."

"What?"

"You literally had no business in my art, it was my own problem. Why are you doing this?"

"Why don't you ask yourself after you argued with me that night? Why did you have to butt in with my choices?"

"Because you like volleyball! You might look like that someone stole your dinosaur collection when you're at practice, but you're good at it and have a future in it! It is a part of you, and you're deciding to throw it away? Your potential is too big to be wasted and I refuse to let that happen." Her voice is a little louder now, but hoarse.

"There's your answer, little gremlin."

"How is that— Oh."

"But I'd like to add something."

"What is it?"

"You look better doing what you really like. It makes you look less like a hag."

It was silent after that. (Y/N) punched his arm. Tsukishima didn't even wince but asked, "What was that for?"

"The last statement was unnecessary, and the first one is sweet yet cringey." She criticized.

"C'mon, I'm just a teenager. Aren't you the cringey one most of the times?"

She used the handkerchief to sniffle her runny nose away, "Why do you have a knack of returning everything I said to me?"

"I won't do it if it's not appropriate." Tsukishima placed his hands on her back and to her hair, "So, what are you going to do now, (Y/N)?"

"I'll think things through. My brain is still slightly messy, but I'll be fine, thanks to you. But Kei..."

He hummed as a response. "I don't want to go home. I want to run away."

"Not possible. You can't survive on your own. You're almost 18 and until now, you don't understand how a washing machine works with all your perfect scores in exams."

"This is just a thought. I didn't say I'll be alone. I'm taking you with me."

"I refuse."

"Why?"

"Couldn't you wait for more months until we graduate?"

(Y/N)'s eyebrows raised, "So basically, you're agreeing, but not this time?"

"No, but you'll be free of your parents' suffocating control. Who knows how huge is your potential by that time."

"How considerate of you." The girl smiled.

"Only this time. And no, we won't live in the same place in college. Not yet. Not until we finish our studies, have secured jobs, and get important things done."

"Will you be playing volleyball at college?"

He lazily replied, "Probably."

"Don't give me such an ambiguous answer!"

"Probably yes."

"Hmm. Fine by me. I'll continue to draw, then." (Y/N) rested her head near Tsukishima's neck.

He smiled a little at her answer, "Another thing though. I don't think... you should leave things with your parents like that. There'll be a time where you have to face it."

"Yes, that sucks... I don't want to think about it but I'll have to go back eventually... When that confrontation happens, I'll try to calmly talk it out with them. I will never be certain if it will end well. But my hate and fear of them won't change."

"You can always run back here if it didn't end well."

"Kei, don't want to see their faces just yet. Can I stay here for a while?"

"You even bother to ask. You are welcome anytime in this household. Just enter the house in the front door, not in my window."

"Right... thank you."

"Oh, now it's my turn to ask. How did you get in there?"

(Y/N) sighed, "It was on 4:30pm. I was on the loose and I looked for a store where anyone can't recognize me so I can eat for lunch. But there's this creep who kept on following me—"

"Did he hurt you?" He abruptly questioned.

"No. I ran as fast as I could before he could even get close to me, but in the next block, there were the town authorities with my mom, and I knew they were looking for me, so I blended into the people with my hoodie on and made my way. I climbed the tree in panic that they'll find me and hid there. It took me hours to notice that your house is just next to it, so I decided to climb to your window. However, the window was locked, and I was stuck."

Tsukishima sighed in relief. "It was a miracle that a klutz like you didn't fell off the tree and surprisingly, no one found you."

"I was high in adrenaline when I climbed the tree. My blending and hiding skills are in ninja-tier now, I beat you."

"Whatever. What did you have for breakfast?"

"...a melon bread."

"Just that?"

"Just that."

Tsukishima kissed her forehead before lifting her up with him. "Go change. Borrow any of my clothes. I'll reheat the food."

(Y/N) kissed his cheek, slowly got off him and went upstairs. Tsukishima opened his phone to text Yamaguchi about her situation and proceeded to reheat the spicy curry.

"Wait, Kei! Is it okay for me to eat?" She shouted from upstairs.

"What kind of question is that? Of course you can." He shouted back.

"Your mom left that for you, for your dad and for your brother. I'd feel bad."

"My brother and dad will come home late and I'm sure they've eaten already. So is mom."

"Are you sure? I can replace the food." She said while going down the stairs.

"Oh, you can cook? I'm afraid you'll burn the whole kitchen." He mocked.

"At least not the whole house." (Y/N) laughed, "Just kidding, I have a tiny knowledge in cooking."

"You don't have to, I told you they already ate. I'll bring out the sushi mom made if you still want to eat."

"Alright. Thank you for the food."

Few hours later, Tsukishima's mom came home and took off her shoes. "I'm home."

As she was about to enter the living room, Akiteru greeted her and placed his finger in front of his lips, indicating her to keep quiet. She wondered what was going on and saw her youngest son and his girlfriend leaning on his shoulder, asleep on the couch in front of the TV. He signaled her to read the note Kei left on the table.

To mom, dad, and brother,

Earlier in the morning, (Y/N) went missing and her parents and town authorities were looking for her. I found her on the way home, but it turns out that she ran away from her home because of an intense argument between her parents, and doesn't want to be found yet. Please let her stay here for a while. I'll do most of the household chores or any favor you ask me in return.

Mom, I shared the curry and sushi rolls with her. I left for some for dad and brother. (Y/N) said it was very delicious.

Love,

Kei.

She smiled after reading the note and looked at the sleeping kids. She took notice of (Y/N)'s eyes and quickly understood the situation. Before she left to rest in her room, she looked for a spare blanket and laid it atop them to keep them warm.

(Y/N) snuggled further to Tsukishima's arms, satisfied on how this night will end well, unlike yesterday's.

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songbirdsingingthings · 4 years ago

Text

Ice Skating - Shouto Todoroki x Reader

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THESE CHARACTERS, THEY BELONG TO KOHEI HORIKOSHI

DAY SIX OF 25 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS - 25 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS MASTERLIST - MAIN MASTERLIST

A/N: This is my favorite that I’ve written so far, also I don’t know a ton about ice skating so there might be some inconsistencies with the sport irl <3

Maybe a class 1A trip to the local ice skating rink wasn’t the best idea but it certainly wasn’t a boring one. With each student bundled up and topped off with hats, earmuffs, and insulated headbands, you were all seated and tugging on your skates. Two benches away from yours, you already see trouble stirring.

“Oi, dunce face, watch your waddling!” Bakugou exclaimed, standing up. In the process he wobbles slightly, but is stabilized by grabbing onto Kirishima’s arm.

“Haha, sorry Bakugou!” A sheepish Denki replies. You smile at the silly interaction and return your focus to lacing up your skates. You’ve always loved skating, ever since you were little, and you did it often enough that your parents had bought you your own pair of skates. You never went super far into the sport but you do know how to do a few jumps and tricks.

“Wow, Y/N, your skates are so pretty!” Uraraka complimented. You flush a bit, looking at what's on your feet compared to the others. The pretty ivory white did look quite stunning next to all the boot-like skates the rest of your classmates were wearing.

“Oh, thank you! They were a Christmas gift a while back.” You stand up with ease and stretch a bit.

“Have you skated before?” Poking out from behind Uraraka, you see Midoriya's face with a curious expression plastered on it.

“Yeah, I got lessons when I was a kid but I didn’t compete or anything. I knew when I got my quirk that I wanted to become a hero but it didn’t hurt to have a hobby.” You say, smiling as Uraraka helped the green haired boy to his feet, red faces exchanged between the two.

“I wonder if Todoroki has ever been ice skating. I mean he does have an ice quirk.” Uraraka wonders. You’re sure that she doesn’t realize that her hand was still holding Midoriya’s, but you make note of it to tell her later.

“Hmm?” A smooth voice questioned from behind you. Speak of the devil, you remark, turning around to see the boy the three of you had been talking about. Wearing a white, loose turtleneck and a soft pair of black pants, he looked great. You get lost in thought for a second but shake your mind from its grasp, flashing him a nice smile.

“We were wondering if you’ve ever been ice skating,” You say, reiterating Uraraka’s previous question. A small smile and... wait was that a blush? flashes across his face.

“I haven’t, actually. This would be a first for me.” He says, looking at the rink through the plastic barriers.

“Well then,” Uraraka starts to say, making her way - as best she could with skates on - over to you. Oh no, I know that tone, you think as she links an arm through yours. “You should ask Y/N to give you some pointers! She was just telling us how she used to skate when she was younger.” You panic a bit on the inside but show no fear on your outward expression. When Uraraka had told you about her crush on Izuku Midoriya a couple months ago, you had shared your small crush on Shouto Todoroki with her. You might be regretting that a little bit now.

“Uh, yeah, sure. Are you okay with that?” He asks you. You see something flicker in his eyes, but not being able to a finger on what it actually was, you let it go.

“Yeah! That’s cool with me!” Mentally facepalming for acting so weirdly casual, you make your way over to the gate. However, everything seems to calm as soon as you step onto the ice. The glossy surface beneath the blades of your skates felt so comforting, melting all of your previous worries. You take a few glides across the ice to get a good feel and turn back to wait for Todoroki. The rest of the class piles onto the ice in an… unorganized fashion, but they all look to be having a good time. You even spot Uraraka and Midoriya skate past you, very discreetly holding hands. This causes a giddy smile to break out over your face.

“They seem close.” Todoroki comments as he starts to shakily enter the rink. This causes a laugh to erupt from you. The red-and-white haired raised an eyebrow and you shake your hands in front of you.

“Sorry, that just caught me off guard. Are you ready to start?” You ask, looking over his stance. While he did stumble a bit as he entered, he seemed to be doing fine now.

“Yeah, uh, how do I move forward?” He asks you, heterochromatic eyes meeting your Y/E/C ones. You smile and skate so that you're parallel to him, granting him a better angle at looking at your movements.

“To start, I usually push off of my dominant foot like this,” you say, directing his gaze to your preferred foot, stepping forward in a somewhat diagonal angle. You step a few more times and turn back to Todoroki. He nods, his eyes on the ice beneath his skates as he tries to copy your movements and immediately succeeds. He looks up to find your eyes but is graced with a beaming smile. “Wow Todoroki! That was amazing, it took me ages to do it that well,” you praise, skating over to be next to him. The both of you start to glide in a synchronous manner, matching your steps exactly.

“So Uraraka was saying that you did this when you were younger?” He inquires as you make your second round around the perimeter. You nod and smile, effortlessly gliding across the ice. “Did you ever go into competitions?” His second question surprised you a bit. Of course, you had several conversations with each other about non school or hero related things, but him asking about what your younger self liked to do made you blush a bit.

“Oh, uh, I didn’t, no. At the age I was, I wouldn’t be able to compete properly with the other girls.” He nodded but you see that same flicker in his eyes as you did before.

“I used to watch skating competitions with my mother when I was younger. I, um, always thought they were quite beautiful.” You grin at him as you pause at the gate.

“That’s what drew me to the hobby originally. The intricate moves and spins always seemed to capture my attention.” Todoroki immediately agrees with you, leaning against the wall.

“Can you do some of them?” He asks, a small smile gracing your face. You nod, bashfully.

“None of the super cool ones but I can pull off a few doubles.”

“Could you show me?” Your eyes go wide at his request and only get bigger when, from behind you, Uraraka cheers.

“Everyone clear the ice! Y/N is gonna show us her moves!” Red rushes across your face which causes Todoroki to immediately start apologizing.

“Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to put you on the spot-”

“It’s fine, Todoroki. I’d be happy to show you.” Before you step out and glide to the center of the ice, a hand wraps softly around your wrist.

“Shouto.” He says simply, causing an eyebrow of yours to raise in confusion. “Um, call me Shouto.” If you weren’t already grinning then you were definitely beaming at him.

“Then I would like you to call me Y/N.” You swear you see a blush creep up onto his cheeks, but you skate to the center of the ice. That’s when you see that the entire class had stopped to watch what you were doing. A little stage fright, you glance around until your eyes fall back onto Shouto’s. Just his eyes meeting yours results in immediate solace. You start to skate around the middle, gaining speed as you prepare your first jump - a double toe loop. You prep, spin your leg, and jump off of the ice, turning twice in the air before landing. You were honestly proud of yourself - it had been a little while since you practiced these kinds of jumps but you were able to execute them and land almost perfectly. You do a few more jumps, one double axel and one double salchow, before you skate back into the middle and stand there, awaiting your class’ response. You don’t expect the class to erupt in cheers but that’s exactly what happened. You laugh a bit before you scamper off the ice, donning guards to protect your blades.

“Y/N, that was incredible! If I had roses I would throw them all on there!” Uraraka exclaims, her arms thrown around you in a hug. You thank her and give her a grin as you walk towards the water fountain, gaining several pats on the back while the class clambered back onto the ice. All of the class, except for one person.

“I don’t know much about ice skating but I know enough to say that what you did was quite beautiful.” Shouto says, leaning against the wall next to you. A happy expression broke out across your face.

“I’m glad you liked it.”

“I was also wondering if…” his sentence trailed off, your happy expression replaced with an eager one now.

“Yes, Shouto?” You urge him, hoping and praying that what he was about to say matched what you had in mind.

“I was wondering if you would like to study with me later tonight, in my dorm.” Now, normally this wouldn’t have been the greatest step for a regular relationship, but for Shouto it was leaps and bounds.

“I would love to.” You respond with a sweet look in your eyes. As the two of you step back out onto the ice, he takes your hand in his - subtly, like what Uraraka and Midoriya had displayed earlier - and starts to skate around with you. A few beats of silence passes which you are happy to break. “Would I be safe to assume that this study session would count as a first date?” You inquire cheekily, looking between him and what was in front of you. Shouto says nothing for a bit but you feel a squeeze in your hand.

“...yes, you would be safe in assuming that.” Oh, what ice skating does to bring out a boy’s courage.

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generallybarzy · 3 years ago

Text

i loved you first.

an: I wrote this mostly a couple nights ago when I was listening to my "ouch" playlist and sobbing so hard I got a 48-hour migraine over the fact that I'll never see my crush again and I can't do anything about it because a) I'm moving in less than a month and leaving everything I know behind and b) he has a girlfriend. But that emotion eventually evolved into "i'm never gonna see some of my best friends again after we move away from each other next month" and that just turned me into this big pit of anxiety where I felt like time was just moving too fast but not at all and I'll miss everything if I don't go do something. So. I was fucking sad and this was the result. completely unedited angst. probably sucks ass, but that's how I'm feeling right now. Anyway, I don't know if you've noticed, but I haven't really been around for a few days. I deleted all my asks so if you had something sent, its gone, and i'm just popping in to post this. idk when I'll be back this time, but i'm trying to take care of my irl relationships and moving and college and all that and it hurts a lot more than i can explain and everythings putting my anxiety through the roof lately. anyway........

song inspo: i loved you first- joan

word count: 2.3k

"You keep running away when I need you most

Running away when I get too close

My heart is full but yours is running out

I think I'm afraid of what comes next

Yeah, I'm afraid you've lost your head

Baby, you know that I loved you first

But now, you're in love with somebody else."

Mat was losing you.

You were his best friend. You'd grown together, laughed together, made stupid decisions together in the wake of your last breakup, he always came to to with his troubles, and, as much as he hated hearing the way your ex treated you, he kept his mouth shut and kept being the shoulder you needed to cry on again and again.

And Mat had been in love with you for as long as he could remember.

Ever since the night of your breakup, he'd been waiting for the right moment to tell you how he felt. You were fresh out of a breakup, and he knew that was the worst time to say anything, so he kept quiet. He helped you get yourself out there and smile once again. He brought that beautiful, gleaming smile back to your face. And it warmed his heart to know he had helped bring some of the sunshine back to your life. He waited and waited, comforting you after all your bad first dates and keeping his cool when you came over for movie night. He tried to ignore the way his heart pounded when you circled your arms around his waist and mumbled "At least I'll always have you, Maty." He tried his hardest to calm his heart and keep his eyes on the movie while you cuddled up with him, wearing his clothes, but the light of his TV betrayed him and lit up the way you were smiling against his chest, deep in sleep, safe and comfortable in his hoodie. He didn't tell you how he felt, all those years. He couldn't lose what he had of you in trying to get more. He would be happy with just this for now.

You rested against his chest, unaware of the way Mat was staring at you as if you'd put the stars in the sky all for him. He was so ready to give you his all, to tell you everything he wanted to say, to finally get to call you his, and hear you call him yours. He leaned down to ghost his lips across your cheek, letting the words fall before he even realized his mouth was moving.

"I love you so much, more than you'll ever know."

Maybe he said the words then because he knew you wouldn't hear, maybe he was afraid of actually telling you, afraid of the chance that he would scare you away with how full his heart was. But he didn't mind. He said it, and as long as he knew he loved you, he'd be content with staying like this for a while while you picked yourself back up and regained your confidence. Once you weren't still reeling from your breakup, he'd let it out. He'd tell you for real.

But then, one of your first dates went well.

He'd gotten his usual post-date text from you, the one he always made you promise to send just so he knew you were safe. He expected another letdown, a list of all the things wrong with your date, or ways they were just like your ex. Instead, you were gushing. Mat couldn't stand the hope in your messages, the way you were so excited, rambling on and on about this guy. He wanted to be happy for you, he wanted to be glad you were finding someone you liked, but he couldn't help feeling the pain from the sting that someone was actually taking you away from him again.

Soon, your movie nights together as friends were overtaken by date nights, and Mat was left alone in his apartment, sitting on the couch you used to cuddle him on, wearing the hoodie you loved to steal, and watching the TV show you introduced him to, half heartedly checking your snap story to see you in the middle of a date with him. He tried to hide his jealousy whenever you spoke of your boyfriend, he tried to appear proud and excited for you, but the hard truth he didn't want to face was that he was losing you. He was losing his best friend, the person he loved the most.

He didn't know when this started. He didn't know how to stop it, but you were pulling away from him. And that scared him. Mat couldn’t stand watching you fall more and more in love with this guy, not when he was right there, willing to give you all the love he had in his heart.

You were the one Mat went to on his worst days. The days when he felt like a waste of space, like he'd never amount to anything more than he was. The days it seemed like the weight of everyone's expectations was about to make him crumble to his knees. The days he needed you most. It only took a quick 'you free tonight? I need you.' text, and you knew exactly the state he was in. 'Of course Mat, I'm always free for you.' But ever since you started dating this guy, his texts went unanswered, unseen, and he was left alone on his hardest nights, with harsh reminders that the girl he loved was falling in love with somebody else right in front of his eyes, while he could do nothing but watch.

This guy had no right to come between you two. After all, Mat had loved you first.

He had comforted you for years over your shitty boyfriends, and this newest guy was no exception. Mat would still find himself, on rare nights, holding you in his arms while you sobbed about how your boyfriend made you cry again, whispering to Mat that 'at least I know you would never do this to me'. But the next day you were gone, running away from him as if you'd never snuggled up in his arms for comfort, as if the late-night conversations meant nothing to you.

'You're right, I would never do this to you." He thought to himself, watching you toy with the sleeve of his sweater and snuggle into his chest to dry your eyes with your best friend's warmth. "So why do you keep going back to the man who hurt you, when I'm right here?'

Mat had so much he wanted to say, and though he didn't want you to run away again, he could only hold his tongue for so long.

"I'm so glad you invited me out for lunch, Mat. He's been such an ass lately, so I'm glad to get away. It's been a while since we talked, yeah?"

Mat couldn't bring himself to answer. God, his heart was throbbing in his chest. He loved you so much, but you were falling in love with an asshole who didn't treat you right. You looked so beautiful sitting across the table from him. The sun was gleaming off your hair, but the beauty was made sour by the necklace that sat around your neck, the necklace your boyfriend had given you on your 3 month anniversary. Mat swallowed back his nerves. "(Y/N), I need to be honest with you."

Any trace of happiness on your face was gone, replaced with dread. Part of Mat felt like shit for making you feel like that, but another, more sinister part, felt a little glimmer of revenge. You'd been running away from him for months, abandoning your best friend for some shitty boyfriend who you still cried over to him, and maybe now you were feeling a slimmer of what dread he had felt when he thought of your crumbling friendship, and the love he had for you that he couldn't do anything with. "What's wrong, Mat? It seems really serious."

"It is." Mat took a deep breath. He couldn't meet your eyes. He didn't know when he started to feel uncomfortable around you. You had always been the person he could admit anything to. Now, you were pulling away from him. "We've been friends for so long, but recently, I feel like I'm… losing you."

"Mat, you're not losing me."

"Yeah, I am. I'm losing you to your new boyfriend.”

Finally, Mat met your eyes, and was astonished by the fear there. How could you spend the last few months drawing further and further away, and then be shocked when he confronted you? Hadn't you realized how little time you spent together? Hadn't you noticed how the only time you spent with him was when he was comforting you from something your boyfriend did to upset you? Hadn't your words- 'at least I know you'd never do this to me'- meant nothing?

"Look, I know you're happy with him, and I'm happy for you… no matter how much you complain about how he's an ass... but… we- you don't come over anymore.”

“I’m- I’m sorry, Mat, I’m more busy than I was when I was single-”

“No, it's not just that. You stopped answering my texts. You know… the ones… when I'm vulnerable. When I need you. I get that you’re gonna be busy, but I opened up to you about shit I would never tell to another person, and I can’t even get a response. You're running away when I need you most…"

He let the silence fall between you again. After a few moments, you spoke up, "Mat…" but your voice fell flat when you couldn't think of the right words to fill the air.

"You still come over, but only when you need someone to dry your tears when your boyfriend did something stupid. You come to me. You only come to me when you need my comfort, but you can’t give me the comfort when I need it, and I’m fucking tired of it.” His words weren’t bitter towards you at all. That’s not what he felt. He wasn’t angry at you, he was angry that either of you had let your boyfriend come between you, he was angry at himself for letting you go, for being too fucking insecure to tell you anything. “You- you keep telling me you wish you could find someone like me. But can't you tell how perfect I am for you?"

"Mat, stop." You were picking with your fingers, a habit he knew all too well.

“I know you remember that night.”

“Mat…”

“It was when you were still trying to date, and always came over after your bad first dates. We cuddled, we…. We got way closer than friends should. I thought- I guess I just thought there was something there. I thought we’d end up as more…”

“I-” Your throat was tight. You hadn’t even realized how much Mat’s words were affecting you. “You can't just… drop all this on me right now, it's not fair."

"What do you really see in him?"

"What?"

"What do you see in him? Does he really love you like you know I do?" You sat quietly, your mouth agape, eyes dropping to the table. Mat’s voice dropped quieter. “You know I love you. I know you know. Friends don’t just cuddle and… and fucking open up about every single little insecurity and promise each other they’ll never leave, and say ‘at least I know you’d never do this to me. I loved you. So fucking much. And it’s so hard to watch you fall in love with someone else, when my heart is so fucking full of love for you.” Mat scoffed in spite of himself. He knew he was fucking it all up, your friendship, any chance of a relationship with you, and it was making his words taste even more bitter. "You know what's not fair? How I have to sit here, watching you fall in love with someone who doesn't love you nearly as much as I do."

“Please stop, Mat.” You quieted him, your hands shaking, in fear of what would come of your surely-shattered friendship. “I- I didn’t know. I didn’t know you felt that way.”

“Bullshit.” Mat was well aware of the tears beading in his eyes, but he tried his hardest to ignore the burn of them rolling thickly down his cheeks. “I- I was always there to hold you… to comfort you when your dates didn’t go well or when your boyfriend fucked up. Can’t you see?”

The silence that fell between the two of you was deafening. Neither of you could make eye contact, and instead focused on staring at the table, not caring about the people inevitably walking around you and wondering what was happening.

“I’m… I’m sorry, Mat.”

“Yeah.”

“I didn't… I’m with my boyfriend. I can’t just…” You shook your head. “I don’t know what you want me to do.”

“Nothing.” Mat sat back in his chair. He’d said what he invited you here to say, and that was all he had planned. He didn’t think of anything else past this point. “I just… I had to tell you. I’m not gonna tell you what to do, I’m not gonna say you have to choose me or him, and I’m sure this fucked up our friendship like crazy. I just- I can’t keep watching this, okay? That’s all I had to say. I know you love him, and I… fuck, I still love you. I just hope you don’t forget about me, alright?”

“Mat, you’re my best friend.”

Mat stood up, sliding down some money for the drink he had bought earlier. God, he felt like shit, watching the girl he loved move on, knowing there was no way they could keep going on like this, no way she would want to keep seeing him knowing how he felt. But he couldn’t hide it any longer, and now, it was ruined.

“I gotta go.”

#this is probably shit and doesn't make any sense #i just had.......... emotions #welp

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mgg-theprettiestboy · 4 years ago

Note

Badboy Matthew blurb pls. Go to town, make it as badboy and smutty/fluffy as your ovaries want 💕🍑

hmmm i think i'm gonna do it like badboy college! Matthew au, cause irl matthew is only a bad boy in the sheets. everywhere else he is a babbling idiot and i love him

–

you loved your roommate, you really did. you didn't mind the excessive smoking or drinking or sleeping until 2pm, cause she was a nice person. but lily’s friends? they scared the hell out of you.

she only laughed when you told her.

“they're all harmless, trust me. i know a lot of the boys look kinda scary, but don't let them intimidate you. especially not gubler. he's got the whole dark and broody thing going on. but he's a good guy.”

and thats how you ended up going to a party with lily. well. it wasn't a party, more of a hangout.

you weren't an innocent sweet college girl, but standing in the middle of this house, you looked like an angel among devils. most of lily’s friends dressed in dark colours. more alt clothing, not like dark academia. you had put on a sexy as hell dark red dress, but you felt like you looked like a child.

you stayed sat on a sofa, and lily stayed near by, but was chatting to her friends. you were happily nursing a beer when you felt the sofa dip beside you. you glanced to your right to see matthew sitting there, a red solo cup in his hand that he drank from, before his eyes scoured over his friends in front of him, before landing on you. you realised you were staring, so you looked away quickly, but you knew he saw. you were just glad he didn't say anything. you were embarrassed enough.

you had to stop yourself from staring as a girl came up, practically leaping into matthew’s lap. she had a really pretty bralette on, and some shorts, and her short blonde hair bounced as she spoke. being bi was aa struggle. everyone was so good looking. she slowly stopped chatting, as she realised matthew wasn't responding to her.

“i was kinda hanging out with y/n,” he said to the girl, who just blushed lightly, “shit, my bad. i didn't think you guys were talking.”

she excused herself with a smile, before leaving.

“you know my name?” you asked, and he looked at you funny, “you're lil’s roommate.”

“i-i know, i just didn't think you knew who i was,” you said, and he shrugged, “we all know who you are. we make a point of knowing the pretty girls names.”

you didn't respond. didn't know how to.

“why did you tell her we were hanging out? we’re just sitting here,” you changed the subject, and he shrugged again, “thats hanging out. technically.”

“I guess,” you replied, and he looked to you, “do you want me to leave you alone?”

“no,” you said, meeting his gaze, “please don't leave me. i don't know anyone else here.”

he nodded, moving his arm so it rested on the back of the couch behind you, “don’t worry pretty girl. i'll take care of you.”

a few days later

“come on, lily, lets go,” artie whined as lily finished her makeup. she flipped him off, “beauty takes time. explains how you get ready so quickly.”

“where's your pretty roommate?” matthew asked, and lily raised a brow, but bit her tongue, “she's at the library. being a good student, or something.”

“we can pick her up on the way? gubler’s driving,” artie said, practically dragging lily out of the room. lily just laughed, “you know she's kinda scared of you guys, right?”

“no, really? I couldn't tell by her big wide doe eyes every time she sees us, and the fact that she goes all quiet,” artie teased, “she looked so uncomfortable when she came over to the house, i thought she was going to bolt.”

Matthew stayed quiet as he drove to the library, and waited outside when lily went in to kidnap you. he looked up to see lily dragging you out of the library, his lips quirking up as he watched you try hold onto the door handle as lily dragged you to the car. she opened the door and practically shoved you into the car, “shut up and get in! you have the rest of your life to study!”

“my test is at 9am! so I actually only have 12 hours!” you argued, grunting as you were shoved further into the car as lily climbed into the back beside you. she closed the door and rolled her eyes, “you're a smartie pants, you’ll be fine.” “i-i’m not even gonna argue anymore, I don't care. where are we going?” you sighed, putting on your seatbelt.

“we’re all meeting up in the park to drink and smoke. do you smoke, y/n?” artie glanced back to you as Matthew began to drive, “sometimes, yeah. i won't tonight, thought. cause I have that test tomorrow.”

“makes sense,” artie nodded, “i brought some sodas to mix with vodka and stuff, but you can just have the soda.”

“thanks,” you said softly, glancing out the window as you made your way to the park. when you got there, the four of you sat down on a blanket on the ground, and you happily hung out with them as they smoke and drank, and more of their friends began to join as well. eventually, lily and artie left to go... god knows where, and left you with Matthew.

you were both sitting in a comfortable silence, before you felt a warmth come over you. you looked to him, to see him moving back to sit after he had sat his jacket over your shoulders.

“i could see the goosebumps on your arms,” he said, and you nodded slowly, your smile beginning to grow as you put your arms through the sleeves, “thanks.”

he snorted a laugh, and you tilted your head as you looked to him. he smiled slightly as he explained, “you're drowning in my jacket. seriously. how tall are you?”

you rolled your eyes, “I'm 5′7. thats not exactly small.”

he deadpanned, “I'm 6′1. you're tiny.”

you scoffed, “I am not! take that back.”

“no, cause its true. you're tiny.”

you narrowed your eyes at him, and he just stared at you in return. you sighed and rolled your eyes, “I hate you.”

“you hate me? then give me my jacket back,” he said, beginning to smile again. “you’ll have to pry it off my body,” you challenged, folding your arms. he raised a brow, “oh, you're gonna regret that.”

“what?” you said, before you squealed as he easily pushed you to the ground, casually hanging over you, using one hand to prop himself up. you just giggled, feeling a little dizzy. he smiled, and you spoke before your brain could stop you, “you have a pretty smile.”

“yeah?” he asked, leaning down closer to you. you felt your heart skip a beat, before nodding slowly, “yeah.”

“everything about you is pretty,” he said quietly, resting his hand on your chin to tilt you head up before pressing his lips to yours. you could feel the coldness from the rings on his fingers, but the softness of his lips balanced it out. you slowly returned the kiss, enjoying it way too much to pull back. unfortunately, Matthew was the one to move away. he chuckled at seeing you pout, pecking your lips once before speaking, “i don’t want you to feel like i'm using you.”

you smiled softly, and this time, he felt his heart skip a beat, “i don’t feel like that.”

“good. cause I'm gonna do that again,” he said, before leaning down and capturing your lips with his again.

okay i kinda like this

also I got carried away and wrote too much what else is new

#mgg #spencer reid #mgg angst #mgg fanfiction #mgg fluff #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid x reader #mgg fic #mgg gifs #mgg x y/n #mgg blurb #mgg x reader #mgg smut

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barnesandrogersfanfics · 4 years ago

Text

Saving Grace - Part 16

A/N- FINALLY an update!! 🙈

Please like/share/comment etc 💕

I was woken up the next morning with Bucky kisses! The best way to wake up!

"Doll" i heard him mumble before pressing a kiss to my bare shoulder, then i felt him kissing my neck.

"Mmmm Buck...."

"Wake up pretty girl...."

"Nooooo" i moaned but started to giggle when his hands started tickling my sides "thats cheating..... stop!"

"Are you awake?" He laughed.

"Not by choice but yes, im awake"

"Im sorry but its important"

"Whats wrong?"

"Nothings wrong but i think i found us the perfect house! I called to ask about a viewing and they said its a popular lot and its gonna be snapped up quick..... butttt i managed to get us in to see it.... well Pepper pulled some strings....."

"What? Slow down Buck...." i chuckled trying to take it all in.

"Sorry I'm just so excited for you to see it! its perfect for us and the kids...."

"Okay baby, what time do we have to be there?" I smiled, i loved seeing how happy and excited he looked and id do anything and everything in my power to keep that look on his face.

"We have an hour"

"Okay I'm up" i nodded as i got up from the bed, Bucky grabbed me for a kiss before i could go far.

"I really think you're gonna love this place!"

The house Bucky took me to looked huge as we drove up to it, a solitary, two story house with a wrap around porch surrounded by woodland. I smiled instantly, it was exactly what we had been looking for.

After walking around the property with Bucky i found myself looking out of the huge floor to ceiling windows at the back end of the house that over looked the prettiest meadow.... this place really was perfect.

"What do you think?" Bucky asked wrapping his arms around me from behind.

"I love it Buck" i smiled up at him "i can see us living here"

"Me too, I'm so glad you like it.... I've kinda fallen in love with the place"

"We can't afford this though....." i said sadly.

"Yes we can, all you have to do is say yes and its ours"

"Are you being serious right now??" I turned in his arms to face him, my eyes wide.... he had to be joking!

"Deadly. We'd have to sign for it now to secure it though. So are you 100% sure that this is the house for us?"

I nodded quickly with a huge smile "100%! But how? Buck this place...."

"Is ours. I knew it from the second i saw it. I have money and Pepper put in a good word for us....welcome home" he beamed before pressing a kiss to my lips.

When we got back to the tower i sat down with Wanda gushing about how beautiful the new house was. Telling her about the meadows and woodland that surrounded the property.

"I mean its like something out of a movie! Its perfect.... its like my dream home"

"Oh my.... Y/N this place is stunning.... can i move in with you?" Wanda laughed.

"You're more than welcome to come stay whenever you want theres plenty of room"

"I'll be sad to see you guys leave again but I'm so happy for you and Bucky. This is a big step for you guys"

"We'll still stop by all the time it'll be like we never left"

"You better!"

"Of course we will. I still can't believe we have a house! I was not expecting this when i woke up this morning. I didn't even know Bucky was house hunting in his own time, we always done that together"

"Im not surprised, Barnes is sneaky!" Wanda laughed.

"It was so lovely seeing how happy he looked while we were at the house Wand's. Gotta say i was not expecting to wake up and go buy a house this morning! I actually thought Bucky was a little mad at me...."

"Why would he be mad at you?"

"because he found me training with Steve yesterday" i shrugged "he's worried he's gonna loose me and the kids"

"Well thats just crazy.... you'd never leave him"

"I know that but its obviously a problem with Bucky. He feels threatened because of the kids...."

"I get where he's coming from i guess"

"I do too but he's wrong. Id never go back to Steve, for so many reasons but i have to have some kind of civil relationship with him, he's the father of my kids at the end of the day and he's gonna be in our life" i shrugged "I don't wanna spend the rest of my life fighting with Steve".

"Do you think.... never mind" Wanda shook her head deciding against saying whatever she was going to say.

"What was you gonna say Wands?"

"Its just, do you think Bucky found that house as quick as he did to get you away from Steve? maybe he feels threatened having you under the same roof...."

"No.... we were already looking"

Was Wanda right?? Did he find the house so suddenly because he felt threatened... jealous even?

I spent the rest of the day constantly thinking about what Wanda had said and it was driving me mad!

Once the kids were down for the night Bucky and i decided to watch a movie before bed. It was about halfway through when I finally had to ask Bucky about the house.

"Hey Buck?" I looked up at him, my head was currently in his lap as his fingers ran through my hair.

"Yeah doll?"

"I need to ask you something....."

"Sure, what is it?"

"its just Wanda said something earlier and now thats all i can think about......"

"What did she say?"

"She just asked if us finding a house so quickly was because maybe you wanted me away from Steve?"

"No....of course not. I'll admit i was a little pissed after seeing the two of you yesterday in the gym.... i couldn't sleep, so i sat up looking at houses" he said looking unsure if he should be admitting how much he it got to him yesterday.

"I'm not gonna lie and say im not glad we'll be away from him though" he smiled "he's getting too comfortable around you and i dont like it".

"Bucky Barnes are you jealous??"

"No......" he blushed

"You have nothing to be jealous of babe i promise. You're the only man for me"

"What if im not enough....." he asked sadly avoiding eye contact. I sat up suddenly taking his face in my hands to make him look at me.

"You are more than enough and i love you so much".

"I love you more"

"Thats an argument you'll never win" i shrugged giving him a smile before leaning in to kiss him "how about you take me to bed Barnes and i'll prove it".

"I can never say no to you doll" he grinned before literally tossing me over his shoulder and running towards the bedroom.

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit @rynabarnesrogers-reading @rainbowkisses31 @rororo06 @supernaturalwintersoldier @hiddelstannerbarnes @bellamy-barnes @buchanansebba @rosalynshields @turtoix @dottirose

Saving grace tags @jennmurawski13 @kenzieam

@captainchrisstan @ms-betsy-fangirl

@damnaged-princess @farfromtommy @lbuck121 @billweasleey @heathens-takeitsl0w

@lacontroller1991 @supervengerslock

@mariswritingforfun @thummbelina @broco8 @ineffableg-irl @writeroutoftime @ek823 @cap-just-said-language @xxloki81xx @death-unbecomes-you @bellemile @buckyandsebastian @afuckingshituniverse @i-ran-out-of-fanfics

#reader insert #chris evans x reader #sebastian stan x reader #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader #chris evans #steve rogers #captain america #sebastian stan #bucky barnes #the winter soldier #saving grace

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peachbearies · 4 years ago

Note

omg ion know if ur taking. Requests rn but I was wondering just a cute lil imagine bout zion in which the reader and him are dating and it's they're one yr aniversary or sum idk lol but just zion being a cutie and telling how much he loves her and shiii (because we all know that his ass acts all big and bad but he is a 6'4 teddy bear irl) yaa ik that was supper cringey but shehej yee okay byee (ur an amazing writer btw I've read all ur work and may I saY I stan 💖)

Promise: Z.kuwonu

Requested

›› Synopsis: it’s your first anniversary with Zion, around this trademark period it makes you apprehensive but Zion reminds you how much

›› Genre: Fluff

›› Paring: Female Reader x Zion Kuwonu

›› Warnings: Slightly hinted nsfw, lots of cursing (I mean it Zion so…), a little glimpse of toxic behavior.

›› A/N: what?! This is not cringe at all baby! I admire cheesy romantic headcanons/ imagines like this. My likes and drafts are filled with fluffs or angst to fluff🤧. I’m sorry this is a tad bit delinquent And thank you for reading my work that means a lot I’ve been exploring a lot of vocabulary words to scrutinize my writing, this may be a long one I apologize I got too into it.

The marvels of what a year could do. From going through a hurricane of songster roaring at each other, the strikes of austere comments leading up to the thunderstorm of a anguish. Your ex-fiancé cheated on, with considerable women before you found out. The ring on your finger was nothing but a reflector and leverage for him, he wanted to appear a saint to the kingdom, but a devil in the moonlight. Apologizing and buttering you up like a slice of bread, didn’t make you dawdle.

Your lucidity and rectitude were more caliber than staying, so you moved out of your shared apartment a week later, during the rotation of moving haphazardly you’ve incoherent yourself from the boys' realm, nor have your inner circle heard of you. You dissipated from the earth. And if you had to be adequate, you relished it that way, what was anyone overlooking anyways? but you were silently asking for space, you would give your leg for it.

Zion stirring in disgruntle, pushing profanities in between his gritted teeth. Don’t get mistaken he wasn’t mad you were ignoring him, just by the way your handling things on your own, he knew it had to be really fucked up if you couldn’t come to him. The veins crawling up his proffered hands outstretched for the keys. The boys jumping up in fear he may do something reckless, Brandon putting his hand in front of the boys to halt them. “Listen—even if we stop him, say anything to him or follow him, he will remotely do exactly what you think he’s going to do, you know how much he cares about (y/n), all we can do is have faith in him” Brandon confirms, but deep inside that rickety heart of his fear was kicking his ass too. They all discern Zion, once the peak of anger overflows his eyes only opines vermilion.

Zion parked in the lot, not noticing your car ghosting its rightful place. His mind was set on figuring what was wrong with you. Climbing the flight of stairs, he knocks on your door, his foot tapping the pallid base. When the door swung open it was ex-fiance, their eyes met in pique just burning to throw punches and a few sparks of curse words. “What do you want?” Your ex tempts him.

For your sake, Zion never snapped in front of him the way he should’ve. “Not you that’s for sure” commenting on his current attire, which was shirtless and some sweatpants. “Where’s (y/n)?” He queries, a scruffy ‘tsk’ pass through his lips. “Not here, that bitch moved out after she broke up with me”

Zion looked at his watch the time read 9:35 pm. “Cool, all I need is nine minutes of your time” Zion tranquility explains to him. Swinging and docking him in the throat; the girl that was staying with him bolting into the living room finding the source of the thump. She screams for Zion to get off him, after give or take six punches, Zion walks away not giving him or her the slightest sight. “If I catch you or her around y/n, better make sure you have good health care insurance and dental”

The next day he waited outside your classroom leaning his foot up against the wall; few girls noticed him but that wasn’t on his mind. When your silhouette appeared, he excused himself in a rush to catch you. “Pretty rich seeing a smile from a ghost” your heart dropped; the voice you were scared to dump your problems on.

What lie could you conjure? “Hey Zion” you breathe, turning in his direction. “That’s my fault I’m sorry, dealing with classes and moving I lost track of time” which was half correct, but it wasn’t the biggest factor. Zion tilted his head, signature hand in hoodie pocket. Closing your eyes with a heavy sigh, you knew he didn’t believe you nor did he want to push you. “Zion—“ he groped your wrist pulling you to the parking lot, he leaned on his car's hood without saying a drop of words, he wants for you to stream all your worries.

“Well, that’s half the reason. Okay, I didn't mean to go completely ghost, life just wasn't easy for me lately, I didn't want to add more dead weight to your shoulder. Sorry” zion scoffs pushing himself away from the car with no hands. But they followed the path to your jawline. ”burden on my shoulder or not, they're made for you to cry on. Stop going through things on your own alright?, as long as I'm here you don't have to sink”

Ever since you and zion grew close, a year later and he still gazes at you like a diamond. Even after a year, the astonishment gets the better of you. The insecurities start raging in, fighting in a war of love and hate. Your phone was laid upon the cherry wooden table, the vibrations frightening you, the goosebumps crawling up your arms. The name it read was “Love🤍”

“Hello?” You answer still shaken up; Zion lets out a soft scoff that vibrates through your body “you’re still in bed mamas? you should be awake beautiful” rubbing your eyes slightly, the clock flashed the numbers ‘ 2:30 pm’ your groan only makes him smile bigger.

“Goddamn I love you, look how ravishing you are in the morning” Zion's eyes shimmering in adoration. Those eyes always reflected his emotions, deep down you knew Zion loved you wholeheartedly, but the fear of having something good taken from you. That is what kept you hesitant. “No, I don’t stop lying” you stroke his ego.

“Me? Lie? Babygirl, I can’t and won’t lie to you stop playing” Zion said in a low octave, your stomach stirred in feelings “do me a favor baby” “Which is?” You reply, Zion looks over on his nightstand smiling. “Why are you smiling? Are you being mischievous again?”

“Who me? Nah” Zion shrugs off. The ringing of the doorbell distracted you from his spreading grin “answer that” sighing you walk towards the door, propping your phone on the counter, Zion moans out loud. “Maybe I should’ve slept over last night! Who told you to look that good mamas?” Ignoring his flirty antics you open the door, glimpsing at fresh bouquets of your favorite flower and a self-care basket. “Baby!!!” You screech, Zion simpers at the brightest smile on your face. The sun doesn’t shine as bright as you did at the moment.

“Why?, why are you so loving to me” you start to happy cry “Nah baby none of that, I love you too damn much for you to self-deprecate” Zion shuts your negativity down. Flipping the card over you read the message. ‘You thought I’d forget the day you changed my life? I’ve always loved you and I’ll continue to love you, but it’s not your love that I adore the most, it’s those gorgeous eyes that look back at me. Like I’m some type of angel when we all know that’s you, it’s the way you’re compassionate about others, I love your free spirit baby you’re a dove to me, even though I get under your nerves, I wouldn’t want anyone else to deal with me or my problems happy one year’

You look up at Zion, his eyes were already glossing by admiring your figure. Oh, how you wish jumping through a screen wasn’t just a cartoon thing. “Fuck” you whisper covering your face “angel, you are beautiful” Zion reminds you “stop!!! I’m in my feelings!!” You Jokingly spat at him. “What you wanna do for our anniversary it’s up to you” Zion smiles.

“Can we go to a petting zoo then get tacos?” Your eyes sparkling as your lips turn into a pout, Zion looking up towards the ceiling as his Adam’s apple points at the camera. “Yes, how could I say no” twenty minutes later Zion was at your house, complimenting you the whole car ride. Protectively and passionately rubbing circles on your knees being careful not to raise his hand any further.

“Look! Rabbits” Zion follows your finger pulling you in that direction, you sit on the bench holding the rabbit in your lap feeding it the food. Zion takes pictures of you getting the best angles, falling in love with your beauty, even more, the way the golden light bounced off your skin. It made him think twice if you were real or just a lucid dream. Feeding the monkeys were the best part, they hugged you and Zion; even gave you two kisses. The giraffes were the most exciting to you, joking to your boyfriend “wow look something taller than you”. Walking into a blue-lit aquarium a class of fish surrounded the both of you. Your finger softly touching the fish that was pressed against the glass, it followed your every move. Never realizing Zion detached his hand from yours, it hasn’t hit you until a ring was slid on your finger.

“Not an engagement ring, but soon don’t worry this is a promise ring, and I promise that you’ll feel nothing but comfort and love with me” his fingers gripped into your waist “with a side of pleasure too” you smack his shoulder while smiling ear for ear. “You promise?” “Of course I do, I wholeheartedly promise, I will never hurt or disrespect you baby, you mean too much to me”

Once you were back to the apartment your body couldn’t even make it to the bed, but Zion helped you to the bathroom. To wash off the dirt and sweat, even helped you with your skin routine. His fingers padding over every inch of your back, your soft snores in the crook of his neck. “I’m so glad to be the girlfriend of your dreams” you whisper “oh lord she’s finally figured it out!!” Zion pushes your buttons “should I send you back home?” You test him, “you wouldn’t dare, you need me tonight” Zion teases his swollen lips attacking your neck upwards your jawline, a low gruffly growl trickles down your spine.

“So is this the side of pleasure?” You press your teeth into your lower lip “if that’s what you want”

“Well, you did make a promise” wasting no time Zion straddles you, your legs wrapped around his waist, giggling at how he fumbled to remove his shirt.

“You damn right I made a promise, and I’ll show you how serious this promise is” Zion kisses up your stomach “I love you”

Your hands cupping his jaw the breathing becoming erratic “I love you too”

#prettymuch #zion kuwonu #prettymuch zion

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sukirichi · 3 years ago

Text

[ BROKEN RECORDS ; asks ]

💌 — love letter from @kyriaan

from track 007.

Okay okay im still kinda meh'ish' but i really wanted to answer you so 😭 ill try to compile both my answer to your answer on my love letter and my hyped review on track 7 <3 so yeah another long ass rant from me 😩💕Suki... Suki pls I totally forgot Tsumu had a crush on us Suki... And then poor Tsumu ir there sulking cause he still likes u- JFBFBDVDVSJCHDHSIA omfg i wanted so much to hug him my baby I like him so much 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 and he was trying so hard to behave while just sitting there sad fhfhfvbbshsjfhbdjaofhffhsoshd TSUMU YOU'RE STILL IN MY TOP 3 BABY 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂

And then you throw the whole dancing scene with suna and I dont know whos on my top 3 anymore 🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃 SUKIIIIIIII THAT SCENE ALONE GJGJBFBSJCNFNKSOSNF OMFG IM FALLING SO HARD FOR SUNA I THINK? I think my top 3 had 4 dudes in it cause 3rd place has Suna and Atsumu tied?? Hfhfbfbfhdhsja I CANT PICK?? BUT BUT I WAS FEELING STUPIDLY DOWN WHEN READING THAT AND THAT SCENE ALONE MADE ME FEEL SO SOFT IT WAS SO CUTE AND OMG IF SUNA DID THAT TO ME I WOULD DROP ON MY KNEES AND ASK HIM TO MARRY ME CAUSE OMFGGGFFFF DUDE EVEN WENT AHEAD AND SAID THAT WHOLE 'HES GOING TO BE ONE LUCKY GUY'

Oh shit im crying again that scene lets me emotional 😭😭😭😭 someone get me a sunrin irl pls

Anyways the way that suna knows y/n is just.... FUCKING END UP TOGETHER ALREADY FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST JBVSHSJBEHSISJ

Also how powerful are we?? HOW FUCKING POWERFUL ARE WE TO SCORE SUNA KITA AND TSUMU?? ARE YOU GONNA TELL. ME IF OIKAWA MOFO TOORU APPEARED HE WOULD ALSO BE ON HIS KNEES FOR US?? (okay no wait... No nooo i would legit drop anyones ass for tooru hes that powerful for me like sorry suna was fun but TOORU)

Yo nah but the whole Kita sex scene- let me breath bestie LET ME BREATH CAUSE I WAS HOT BUT AT SAME TIME I WAS FEELING GUILTY 😂😂😂😂 ESPECIALLY WHEN HE WAS FEELING DISAPPOINTED NEXT DAY LIKE KITA PLS BABY WHAT WERE YOU EXPECTING?? 😬😬😬😬 But at same time his 'ill fuck the thought of him out of you tonight' I ALMOST MOANED YASSSSS TELL ME DADDY HOLY SHITTTTT

👀👀👀👀 Still not a kita simp ✌️✌️🤏✌️

Okay Kita deserves the best tho I mean okay he went there as a y/n mom's plan but he did ended up helping alot... Especially cause he knows no matter what y/n heart will always be suna's and pls give Kita the best ending possible cause he deserves someone who will trully love him and show him the world cause mah boy deserves it

*breaths in breaths out* i hated this scene- not in a bad way but shit i hate rejections... To the point im kinda afraid of confessing now cause i despise the feeling of being rejected... The best i can descrive it it like this coldness in your chest that descends your whole body and then you feel frozen in place.. Thats how it feels for me I hate it I absolutely despise it- its also the feeling i have when in a really bad situation and ugh...

The suna part made. Me feel this no matter how many times i reread it the feeling doesnt lessen it keeps being there cause (okay you probably are tired already of me saying this but) Suki I feel like I cant put it in words how much of a fucking good of a writer you are. Ill go ahead and say you are by far my favorite writer the fact i always feel so engaged and the fact i always feel like im there its just- it blows my mind.

I felt like suna was personally rejecting me and i hated it- i swear the moment he said prove it I almost screamed HOW? My brain had to take a moment to just slap me and say: 'kya you reading this is not happening chill-' cause i was already sobbing uncontrollably... I even whimpered the dont leave me 😬 my sadass went to bed feeling so sad thanks to suna... Man i wanted so much to hug him and i swear i would give him as much love as he gave y/n cause well i kin suna alot in this series cause im like that im a giver i treat others the way i would like to be treated (reason why ive been down lately ✌️) and i cant blame suna for finally setting boundaries- his call tho 'do i not stand a chance with you anymore y/n? Are you really not capable of falling in love with me?".... Oh suna... We are in love with you.. We always were we're just fucking stupid 😩

Also mari pls go jump off a cliff <3 youre in need dear cause sleeping with other man just to separate suna and y/n <3 i want so much to punch her 🙂🙃

Now for the love letter part (im so sorry for this being so long ✌️)

You said that if we asked suna he woukd say that he genuinely loved mari okay... Ill go ahead and say yes he liked mari he even learned how to love her and he genuinely cared for her BUT and heres where my personal view comes in so maybe ill be biased here still for me that was just a he loves her as in he cares you also love your friends and care for them but he didnt love her- and by this I mean- he could never be fully committed for her. Yes he loved her and he felt happy with her but like track 7 proved everything he would do in the back of his mind was y/n he deeply wished Mari was her and for that he just loved Mari cause he learned how to care about her- but he never forgot who he trully was in love it. Also the happiness he experienced with Mari was pretty much the one I experienced the bliss of having someone there and that bliss also made suna turn a blind eye to all the red flags from Mari cause to him all the jealousy meant she cared and thats toxic but suna was so desperate for some sort of 'she cares' that even all the possessiveness was bliss for him... And that makes my heart clench for suna...

'suna had to put an effort for the relationship' and saddly i feel like mari didnt... Mari didnt care mari was there because she was a fangirl of suna and got lucky, the way she just discarded him so effortlessly that proved-screamed how much she loved him- she didnt. She was just possessive over him she liked the whole 'hes mine' dynamic and suna was the perfect boyfriend cause he was giving her the world... What he wanted someone to do for him.

Also yeah suna and y/n might have been spurred from them being fuck buddies but well love doesnt really have an agenda- they just clicked, understood each other and had chemistry yeah they had tons and tons of sex but feelings started not because of sex but thanks to their deep connection... Also that dsncing scene in track 7 that alone spoke for their whole relationship- that alone is enough to defend their feelings for each other- yes it might jave started just as fuck buddies but ended up in them loving each other deeply and that is enough love after all doesnt need a perfect start. It can start out of the most stupid ways.

You said life with excitement and fun wouldn't be permanent or real.. Honestly i think it could be.. Cause i mean when you love someone that deeply your life always feels exciting even with the littlest things and that the purest kind of love. Even just going for a walk at the beach would be fun for them or even staying up watching movies i believe suna and y/n would always find a way to make their lofe exciting without much effort.

Also it kinda makes me. Sad when i see some anon saying that y/n and suna relationship are toxic? It makes me. Confused maybe because I was in such extremely toxic one (girl i sweat if you search for toxic relationship my ex's face will be there as an example 🙄) that Mari to me screams toxic! Possessive, manipulative, jealous and a few more if I think closely about it while with y/n and suna they are just two idiots that are hurting each other cause they're just that: idiots one that is afraid to get hurt and the other that keeps hoping- dont get me wrong what they're doing is not healthy but i dont find it toxic honestly

Sorry for the extreme long rant 8D I tried to keep it short but you always make me so hyped to talk about your works 😩

Hfbfbfhfhfieia

[ from saeren ]

NAHHH CUZ I LOVE TSUMU SO MUCH HERE HE WAS SO PRECIOUS. I didn’t write too much about them in college but Atsumu was so cute when he crushed on YN. he was always sending her memes and cute texts like “have you eaten” “good morning” and she’d feel so awkward because she doesn’t know how to let him down easy without hurting him. either way tsumu would feel hurt. AND YES PLS HE WAS SO SAD I MEAN, HIS CRUSH AND HIS BEST FRIEND NEARLY HAD SEX RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM SO THAT’S GOING TO HURT

SUNA AND ATSUMU TIED?? tbh I loved that dancing scene bcos suna is one of my faves and I really wanna do that with him hehehhehe. NAHHH PLEASE SAME IF SUNA DANCED WITH ME AND MADE A WEDDING PLAYLIST I’D BE LIKE boy what’re u waiting for let’s get married now !! n yes he said whoever YN will choose in the future will be one lucky guy IM SOBBING RN

naur cuz. there’s something about dating your best friend. I’m not saying a boyfriend wouldn’t know you as well but there’s something different when you’re best friends first. they could literally share eye contact and have a long ass conversation just from that. their connection is different.

HAJKALA AS FOR THE POWER, BR! YN IS A VERY CHARISMATIC AND FRIENDLY PERSON !! she’s like one of those people you meet that not only are they attractive as hell, but they’re also super approachable and down to earth. that’s why she’s so popular + she’s flirty and can make a stranger feel welcome or comfortable in the first meeting. SGSHJAK I WAS ACTUALLY PLANNING TO ADD OIKAWA HERE BUT I WANNA MAKE IT MORE INARIZAKI CENTRED

the seggs scene with kita SOBSSSS he’s such a soft dom IDC he knows where the clit is, he knows how to hit it. he’s a “your pleasure first before mine” type of guy. kita is perfect, PERIODT. HE GIVES DADDY VIBES HUH AHSKAA HE’S SO SWEET YET SEXY IM IN LOVE WITH HIM ISTG IF SUNA WASN’T OUR BEST FRIEND THEN I’D RUN FOR KITA ALL THE TIME. and I agree, kita deserves the best !! and don’t worry, I actually plan on giving kita the best ending, I promise you he’ll be fine (slight spoiler there)

YESSSSS OMG I’VE BEEN REJECTED BEFORE AND THAT’S EXACTLY HOW I FELT, MY BODY WAS SO COLD AND I WAS SO CONFUSED LIKE IT MAKES YOU THINK. am I not good enough, did I do something wrong, do you not wanna give me a chance or try it out but ofc I’d never say that out loud. AND KYAAA AAAH IM YOUR FAVORITE WRITER??? NO CUZ YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE ME CRY. I remember ur asks way back reckless era and you used to tell me that my writing made you picture the scenes easily and you felt you were there in that moment and I’m just so grateful thank you so much <33

NO BCOS WHEN SUNA SAID “prove it” I was like. this is it. that’s his hot boy shit moment. man’s has had enough of being thrown from one toxic relationship to another and he also deserves his good moments yknow. and you kin suna here?? BESTIE IM SORRY TO HEAR THAT, SUNA’S BEEN THROUGH A LOT HERE AHSJAKA. that’s true about suna tho !! he’s definitely affectionate + a giver. he’s happy being the one who gives most of the time but he’s a human as well, ofc he’d want to receive the same amount of love back. ALSO HIS PHONE CALLLLLL ugh tbh that part was the one that made me the saddest bcos he’s just. he wants to know if there’s really no more chance. all this time he never gave up. but he’s also tired so if yn says ‘no more’ then he’ll give up. its his way of respecting himself too ahsjaka

YOOOOO I AGREE WITH THAT. he cares for mari as a person but not 100% as a lover. but ofc he’s still thankful for how happy she made him because she was there at his worst. and that’s true, deep down suna still wishes that it was YN who’s right beside him. he will always ALWAYS want her back. he learned how to love mari in a way that was more out of mutual care but not in the way he loves YN. no that’s reserved only for YN – she will remain no 1 in his heart. AND YESSSSS the reason why suna overlooked the red flags was bcos to him, its something that was supposed to be “normal” like no perfect partner existed. he thought mari’s attitude of pushing YN away was normal, and its normal to want your partner’s best friend keep some distance but not to the point of mari’s place where she literally wants the two of them to cut each other out of their lives.

and aww I’m so happy that you realized how I wanted to portray suna and yn’s relationship. they’re….like the definition of youth in its freest form. they were fucking around and doing stupid things, but they had a connection. they had something deeper than just sexual intimacy. even if they never dated or even if YN never proposed the idea of it, they would’ve actually been still great friends. and oooh I actually don’t remember saying life with excitement and fun wouldn’t be real HAHAHAHA so I can’t comment further on that. but I think when I ‘said’ those I probably meant that it’s not always going to be all rainbows and unicorns in a relationship. there’s no such thing as a relationship that’s always happy and sweet 24/7, but ofc it can be sweet and it can be pure even with the little things <33 they just need to work on it.

hmmm tbhhhh… suna and yn are toxic in a way that they refuse to let each other go when they clearly can’t meet halfway. toxic doesn’t have to be limited in just being mari-like in which they are possessive or manipulative, because then if we’d drive deeper into yn’s personality, then she’d be stringing suna all along and that’s unfair of her. she knows suna wants more and yet she remained being friends with him, which totally isn’t a bad thing, but it’s because she keeps flirting with him and is so romantically comfortable with him that she doesn’t realize it’s hurting suna because he’ll give double meanings to that. their relationship is ‘toxic’ because they’re not entirely good for each other, they’re not that ready to be with one another yet and neither is the world letting them be in peace, so forcing their relationship to a point they’re hurting another is the toxic part.

[ from @kyriaan ]

Ah also not me feeling all proud and mushy cause my analysis made you mind blown fjfbdnsjdkpa 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 I guess its also because i see this story as a really big mirror of my own toxic relationship sonits extremely easy for me to get it... And oh boy the way i kin suna here

But dhdhfjdospdhfbsoa 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i feel happy now *huggles*

[ from saeren ]

and aah yes ofc, I’m really happy whenever someone can see the underlying details I scatter throughout the story !! yeah omg same hahahaha broken records is also half inspired by the toxic people I’ve met. I kin kita here tho and I’m so glad you’re happier now !!

#asks with naoya's trophy wife #series ( broken records )#tw: toxic

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neo-shitty · 3 years ago

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toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

#toff.asks #wild anon 🐺

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burnedbyshoto · 5 years ago

Text

Twice - Alphabet HC’s

a/n: this... actually made me appreciate jin so much??? like I never really thought of him romantically until now and... my heart D:

A = Affection (How affectionate are they with an s/o?)

He is big on affectionate. Even when experiencing large personality swings, there is one constant. You. he will always love you.

B = Breath (What could their s/o do to take their breath away?)

Taking his face in your hands and calming him down when he panics when his mask is gone. It’s small, it’s not even that big of a thing, but when you stare in his eyes… he feels whole, he feels split, and more importantly, he feels like there was nothing ever wrong

C = Cuddling (Do they cuddle? If they do, how and when do they cuddle?)

He LOVES BEING THE LITTLE SPOON OKAY???? HOLD HIM BETWEEN YOUR ARMS AND WHISPER SWEET NOTHINGS IN HIS EAR

Isn’t always in a cuddling mood though, sometimes he’s too jittery to sit there

D = Dream (What do they dream of doing with their s/o?)

He dreams of one day being able to leave his mask behind with your help. He wants to be able to feel comfortable with himself outside of the mask

E = Effort (How much effort do they put into a relationship?)

He puts in a lot of effort, even if he swings between being like “fuck romance” and “I love you with all my heart” the latter will always win, and he does. The. most.

F = Fear (What do they do if their s/o is scared? How do they handle it?)

He will be your guard dog. Holding you tight, glaring at anything and everything that comes near you. He will defend you, fight anyone. He will do this until you feel safe until you’re ready

G = Gifts (What type of gifts do they give their s/o? Do they want a gift in return?)

He gives you the weirdest shit ever. Like not in a bad thing, just things you would never buy yourself??? I mean you always love the small and intimate gifts he ends up bringing you but you’re like “...why do I need 50 kg of rainbow slime?” “because you were talking about it for 2 hours, and well, there was a sale!”

He doesn’t want gifts in return, but loves every single gift you’ll give him in return!

H = Hugs (Do they hug their s/o? How often?)

His arms are ALWAYS hugging you!!!!!!!!!! Okay??? He just loves feeling whole and you’re his missing link

I = Intimacy (How romantic are they? Do they have problems with intimacy?)

He’s the kind of guy that others don’t think are being romantic, like they’ll look at what he does and will ALL be like “uhh…” and look at you ready to hear you complain but are instead greeted with you sobbing and throwing yourself into his arms

J = Jealous (Do they get jealous? How do they act when jealous?)

Not a jealous bone in this baby!!!!! He trusts you to kick fucking ass to anybody who tries putting themselves on you. Will only intervene if you need him.

K = Kiss (Are they a good kisser? Do they like to kiss? How often do they try to kiss you?)

Not a good kisser, but his enthusiasm is highly and lovingly noted. He loves kissing you!!!!!! And will try to kiss you at least once a day, even if he has to go find you to do it.

L = Love (When do they say they love you? How often do they say it? Do they prefer to say or show it?)

He will say it before a year of you two dating. He knows he’s not the easiest to deal with, and the fact that you’ve stuck around, it really makes his heart go doki doki. He will say it all the time (“can you roll over? I need more blankets! Thank you, I love you.”) loves showing it and saying it.

M = Marriage (Do they want to get married? If so, what kind of ceremony?)

He wants to marry you, las vegas style.

N = Night out (What type of dates do they like to go on? How often do they like to go on them?)

He likes paintball dates. Those are his favorite dates. He likes doing things with you, like escape rooms, all that shit!!!! He also enjoys laying a blanket by the fire and just eating dinner there. Likes having dates about twice a week ;)

O = Out of the Ordinary (What’s something they don’t normally do with/for their s/o?)

He’s not a big texter! So if you don’t see him irl you won’t hear from him at all for the day

P = Playful (Are they playful in a relationship? If so, how do they play around/mess with their s/o?)

He likes messing around with you!!! Prank wars are a thing, and pranking others in the league is something that really tickles your funny bone.

Q = Questions (Do they ask their s/o their opinion on things? Do they share theirs?)

Always asks for your opinion on things, he’s first and foremost super curious about all your thoughts, and he has self-doubt. He is a very open and honest person, so hell yeah he shares his opinions!!!

R = Random (How spontaneous is their relationship? Do they do things on the spot or plan ahead?)

Its very spontaneous or super predictable. Jin becomes more predictable when danger lurks, so you’ve associated spontaneity with better times

S = Sleep (How do they sleep with their s/o?)

He sleeps with his head on your stomach, don’t ask why he just really likes having his face there! Plus it’s hard to breathe when he’s on your chest.

T = Trust (How much do they trust their s/o?)

If jin had to decide on one person in the world to shoot a gun on the apple on his head from 12434243 feet away, it would be you.

U = Unique (What makes them unique as an s/o?)

His enthusiasm. You just do not ever expect it and when you realize that he is genuine and pure in all of his feelings and thoughts, it kinda makes you feel weird. But you love it, and you wish more people were like him, bold and brash and true.

V = Vulnerable (How long until they can be vulnerable around their s/o? What are they like in this state?)

Being truly vulnerable doesn’t take that long. He is an honest person and if he loves you and knows you feel the same way he’s gonna open up like nobody's business.

Jin is a bit frantic in this state, crying, highly emotional, tearing between different personalities like a pendulum swinging, but you don’t leave him until he’s calmed down.

W = Wild Card (Get a random domestic headcanon of the character of your choice)

Jin is making a scrapbook, full of every little thing that the two of you have done together. Every movie, ever amusement park, he has love notes, and he has pictures you weren’t aware of in the slightest way

X = X-Ray (What would they do if their s/o got injured?)

He will cater to you without even blinking an eye. He will run to the store for you, making you soup, getting a thermometer, fixing your bandages, and always giving you more water to drink.

Y = Yuck (Do they have any pet peeves about their s/o? Are there any habits that might bother their s/o?)

Nope, he loves you just for you. All of you. No matter how weird you are, he wouldn’t change a single detail about you. Why would he?

Z = Zeal (Are they passionate as an s/o? Do they want or like passion?)

He is a super intimate and passionate lover!!!!!!! He does the most for you and most times does it without even realizing it!

NSFW:

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

He is bouncing off the walls. He will go and grab everything for you as quickly as he can, he’s a bit sloppy though, not going to lie, but you still appreciate a large amount of effort he puts into it.

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite feature is his hands, they’re just… a demanding focus on his body he thinks, and he knows how to use them in a way that makes you feel good. His favorite body part on you is your eyes. He loves that he can read exactly how you’re feeling by peering into your eyes. It’s just so much more satisfying than anything else. But if we’re talking body body, he’s an ass man.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

His cum is pretty thin and very milky, super fucking warm, and enjoys seeing it splatter against your face.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He’s nearly fucked a clone he made of you one day after not seeing you in a long time, and he was so needy, and nothing was working! He knows your proportions like his name and well when it came to penetration he just couldn’t do it and had to call you immediately afterward.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

He is actually sort of experienced, he had a healthy sex life before his mental dip, and it’s still evident in the way he loves you. But he’s just so gentle with you sometimes you think that he doesn’t know what he’s doing.

F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Missionary or reverse cowgirl.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

He can be humorous in bed, especially once he’s no longer so shy around you in bed, you two are the ones to argue about a Spongebob episode while he’s slamming into you

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

It’s really badly groomed. He just doesn’t have the patience to groom it correctly. There are a few nicks and uneven patches, but you don’t mind. And the carpet is darker than the drapes.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

He is a very intimate person when it calls for it. As long as you aren’t goofing off expect for his words to be a prayer to your body in your ear, his eyes peering lovingly into yours. His soul is yours.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Loves masturbating with you. Especially when the two of you are too lazy to actually fuck, he just loves watching the way your fingers fuck yourself as he madly fists away.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Isn’t that kinky, to be honest. Like he’s open to everything but there isn’t one thing that set him off because everything about you makes him horny.

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

He really likes fucking in a super big mattress, California king. He likes rolling around with you, so he needs the room.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

The thing that gets him going is after you’ve showered and you’re just waiting there for him. You look so pure and clean and innocent, but you’re not and welp there he goes.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

Will not ever put anything over his head. Blindfold, mask, gag. It makes him panic, it makes him freak out unless it’s his mask, but he tries not to wear it in bed with you.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Loves giving it more. His skill is actually pretty good with this because he just enjoys using tongue, so he’s not bad at it at all.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Slow and sensual all the fucking way. Not that he doesn’t want to fuck you until the bed breaks, but there’s just something so much more rewarding about fucking you nice and slowly, his lips dragging against your skin… it’s just superior.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Not into quickies unless that’s all he can do. He just loves the passionate foreplay that is proper sex and you can’t get that with a quickie.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

He is into experimenting as long as the two of you discuss it beforehand, he doesn’t like having things sprung upon him during a session. Discuss before enacting!

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

He can last a few healthy rounds, and he takes a while to come due to the slower nature of your sex.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Doesn’t own toys, but will buy them when the two of you want to be kinky. He enjoys watching you use them on him. He’s a little more of a sub!

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Doesn’t like teasing you at all, he’s very straightforward and won’t take you on a wild goose chase to get his dick in you.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He’s quite loud, he’s already very vocal, and well when you’re fucking him he has no restraint. Moaning and groaning are his favorite noises.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

He wants to one day use his quirk to fuck you. You want more than one of his dicks surrounding you when he does you, and he may not be quite ready for that, but one day maybe when he’s ready it will happen.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

He’s a bit smaller than average. 5 inches flaccid and 6.5 while erect. Very veiny dick that’s more concentrated along the front of his cock.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

He has a semi-high sex drive. Like he doesn’t need to fuck every three days, but he enjoys it.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

As soon as he’s done providing for you, he will pass out LOL

#twice x reader #bubaigawara jin #jin bubaigawara #jin x reader #bubaigawara jin x reader #bnha writing blog #bnha #bnha x reader #bnha twice #mha #mha x reader #mha headcanons #mha twice #twice smut

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whumping-every-day · 5 years ago

Note

if you’re still taking request fr bthb, anger born from worry in the gabriel series??

Guys, training is killing me. Nonnie, it has been 19692598796 years, but here is Anger Born of Worry! A direct continuation from this drabble.

Content warnings: Discussion of self harm, conditioning, pet whump, fear, y’all know the deal by now about the blurry line between creepy caretaking and comfort. Also I would not advocate for dealing with issues of self harm this way irl. Softer than it sounds?

Masterlist

–

Gabriel has never seen his Masters angry before, and he is afraid.

With First Master, it had been easy. Do what he was told, and do it perfectly, or he would be hurt until his performance improved. He should always be grateful for punishment, and thank Master for every lesson. Second Master was harder to read; he had left Gabriel underground, in the damp and cold, long enough for Gabriel to outgrow his cuffs and start to hear voices in the darkness. Then the man had found a use for him, and Gabriel had rediscovered obedience and fear. Second Master’s anger had been a terrible thing, easy to stir up and violent in its course.

These are things that Gabriel always learns of his owners. And now, in this warm, golden paradise his Master and Mistress have offered him… now Gabriel gets to learn again.

He is limp like a rag doll while Mistress pulls the shirt off over his head. It’s too late to earn mercy, he can see it in the way her hands shake - with fury, perhaps? Master looms in his periphery, trapping them in the kitchen.

He needs to learn this lesson, but he is afraid.

“You could have sent yourself to the hospital, young man,” Mistress is muttering. “You could have been really hurt, you have slipped, you could have – this knife isn’t even clean -” She’s rambling, and once she ascertains that the boy doesn’t need stitches she sits back abruptly, pressing the back of her hand to her mouth.

The silence stretches, heavy and loaded. Mistress takes a slow breath, and then she’s snapping back into motion and dragging the first aid kit closer.

There’s footsteps, then that large, dark presence is crouching beside his sister. “Mari,” Stefan murmurs. He reaches out to put a hand on his sister’s shoulder, and Maria shrugs it off in a quick motion. Something glistens on her cheek, but she’s already turning away.

“ ‘m fine,” she mutters. “He’ll be fine. I just – I need to do this.” This, of course, being tend to their wayward pet.

Master’s eyes tick down at the thought, and Gabriel shrinks under his gaze. He can only meet the man’s eyes for a split second before he’s hiccuping apologies again. There’s anger there, but there’s also worry, and sadness, and disappointment, and somehow that’s just as bad.

“I’m s-sorry M-Master,” he stammers. “I’m sorry, I d-didn’t – please, I didn’t mean to-”

“You didn’t mean to stab yourself with a kitchen knife?”

The words aren’t angry, per se, but they’re harsh, and Gabriel cowers as his mouth snaps shut. He gives a tiny, frightened whine, and he can only shake his head helplessly. He hadn’t meant it, he hadn’t, and he was so sorry.

“Stefan,” Mistress murmurs. The antiseptic and gauze are out again, just like the night they’d brought him home, and Mistress is examining where the knife is still buried in Gabriel’s shoulder. It’s a small knife, thank god, and not in very deep - but she still has to pull it out.

“You, deep breath.” It’s clear when she’s speaking to Gabriel as opposed to Stefan, and Gabriel winces and obeys. “Hold still.” There’s a quick, decisive motion and a quiet sshhk, and then an outpouring of blood. It feels worse coming out, and Gabriel can’t quite help the whimper of pain, curing in on himself just a little.

The pain is familiar, and Gabriel grits his teeth and breathes through it, squeezing his eyes shut as his Mistress’s hand approaches again.

This time he flinches at the contact, but Mistress is just dabbing something that stings onto the thin puncture mark. The pain is sharp but brief, and Gabriel keeps his eyes trained on his knees while Mistress expertly tapes a butterfly bandage onto his shoulder. She uses three consecutively, and then they are followed up with a thick wad of gauze and medical tape.

Meanwhile, Master is hovering, looking down at the two of them. “I’m not going to pretend he didn’t just scare the crap out of us,” he mutters to his sister. “And when you’re done patching him up, provided we don’t have to go to the hospital, I think we should sit down and have a chat about what just happened.”

Mistress sighs, but she just pulls out another wad of gauze and nods, and any hope Gabriel had of protection from Master’s wrath sputters and dies in his chest.

“Arm up, sweetheart.” Mistress has taped the last layer of gauze down, and Gabriel does as he’s told, terror and shame still prickling in his gut. There’s blood on the floor. He should have cleaned it up before they got home. Or he shouldn’t have spilled it in the first place, because it isn’t his to spill. He takes the smallest sliver of comfort in the fact that Mistress is calling him sweetheart again. He knows he is going to be punished, but perhaps afterwards, when he is lying bloody and broken at their feet… maybe they’ll forgive him for what he’s done.

He doesn’t try to talk again. He understands that punishment is imminent, and he tries to be as small and meek as he can as he waits. His injury is tended to with gentle and efficient hands, and it’s more mercy than he deserves. When Mistress is done, she sits back, snapping the first aid kit shut with an air of finality.

“You’re lucky you don’t need a tetanus shot.” She shakes her head again, and Gabriel chances a quick glance out of the corner of his eye. The lines around her eyes have eased a little, which he hopes is a good sign. But then she’s straightening again and jabbing a finger at his shoulder with enough feeling to have him flinching simply on principle. “If that starts to bleed through, you tell me immediately. Those bandages should be enough, but if not…”

Gabriel nods quickly. “I’ll – I’ll t-tell you, Mistress,” he whispers, fingers clasped in his lap.

A hand moves in the corner of his eye, and Gabriel’s heart misses a beat – but it is only Master, offering Mistress a hand up. She takes it, and there’s a moment where the two of them seem to be sharing some sort of silent communication. Her fingers dig into Master’s arm just a bit too tight, and Master responds by tugging her into a quick hug.

Gabriel quickly looks away. They are so soft with each other, these two, and the display of tenderness from one Master to the other is bizarre to him. This is something private, something he shouldn’t see.

Someone sniffs, and then the moment is over, and that same hand is being offered to him.

“Come on, bud.” Master is calmer now, it seems, and Mistress is wiping at her cheeks. They both seem shaken, and Gabriel still does not fully understand why.

He doesn’t want to take the hand. Those hands will bring pain, even after all the kindness they have dished out. But still it remains, and Gabriel gives a little whimper and pushes clumsily to his feet on his own.

“I suppose that works. Come.” The simple command is an immediate relief, flooding his system like a drug, and Gabriel immediately falls into step at Master’s heel. Even though he knows he’s about to be disciplined, there is an odd sort of comfort in something finally making sense.

He expects to be led to the basement, where his cries will be muffled and his blood can be cleaned up. Instead they take him into the living room, and Gabriel’s anxiety racks up a notch at the sight of the pristine white carpets. If he bleeds here, it will stain, and then he will be in even more trouble.

He doesn’t want to be in more trouble.

The couch is a lovely beige, and the pillows have white and cream threading and gold tassels. Gabriel is fixated on that, for some reason, as if his mind is grasping for other details to latch onto.

Master settles in the armchair like a king in his throne, and Mistress perches on the edge of the sofa like a jaguar surveying her territory. Separately they are intimidating, but together they are terrifying. Gabriel knows where to go without being told, and he sinks to his knees at their feet and waits.

They had tested him on the first day and invited him up onto the furniture… but Gabriel knows better than that. He knows the rules, he knows how to be good.

“Are you in any pain, sweetheart? Aside from the obvious?” Gabriel blinks at the question and dares a tiny glance up at Mistress’s face. Her brows are pinched, but she’s waiting for an answer.

“N-no, Mistress…”

“Okay. Good.” Mistress nods, almost as if to herself.

“We are both glad you’re alright, Gabriel.” The use of his name, as well as Master’s low baritone, have Gabriel flinching and immediately refastening his eyes on the carpet. He is reminded once again of just how much larger his Master is, and how easy it would be for the strength in those arms to be used in anger.

Gabriel doesn’t dare respond, not when his punishment has yet to be decided.

“We do need to talk about what happened in the kitchen, but there are a few things we should clear up first.” His Master leans back in the chair, but the lines of his body aren’t threatening, even as he watches the boy. “When we got home and your mistress found you like that, we both reacted in a certain way… and I want to make sure we’re all on the same page about why.”

Why? Gabriel stares at Master for a long moment as he replays the words in his head, trying to force them to make sense. There’s a trap here somewhere, surely, some sort of trick or test, but Gabriel can’t figure out where. Is he meant to guess exactly which aspect of his disobedience has angered them the most?

“M-Master?” It’s not an answer, but Gabriel doesn’t know what to do, and the shame curls even hotter and brighter in his gut. This isn’t a question he knows the answer to.

“You scared the shit out of us,” Mistress interjects flatly, and Gabriel flinches. She has her hands in her lap, and the tight lines around her eyes have eased a little… but they are not gone. Gabriel is already trying to make himself smaller, presenting a smaller target. “I don’t think I can pretend that I wasn’t angry,” she murmurs, and Gabriel whimpers softly. Mistress just shakes her head. “Anger is often a secondary emotion to fear or hurt,” she says simply. “I came home, and I found you bleeding on the kitchen floor with a knife in your hand, and I didn’t know what you’d done, or if–” Mistress’s voice wobbles, and it’s shocking enough that Gabriel looks up at her, eyes wide. She takes a moment, closes her eyes, then starts again. “I didn’t know how badly you’d hurt yourself, or if I’d be able to help you. I didn’t know if it was too late or not, or what you’d done.”

He’s never heard that kind of break in her voice before. His Mistress is always confident, always sure. Gabriel gives a quiet little whine, and there’s guilt swelling in his chest now now too. He was bad, but it wasn’t because he made them angry – it was because he’d frightened them.

Just the thought is ludicrous, preposterous. It sounds like a horrible joke, and he’s sure that there is a punchline coming soon.

“Your Mistress is right,” Master murmurs. The man shifts in his chair, and Gabriel trembles when the motion puts him within grabbing distance. “We promised to take care of you, and we will. But that’s hard if you’re hurting yourself.”

There’s silence for a long moment as they let the words sink in. Gabriel isn’t sure if he should speak, or try to apologize again, so he keeps quiet.

“Can you-” Mistress again. “Can you tell us why you did what you did?”

It’s a simple question, but Gabriel finds his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth.

“I’m - I’m s-sorry, Mistress,” is all he has to offer. “I didn’t – didn’t mean to be b-bad, I’m sorry -” Master lifts a hand to silence him, and Gabriel’s mouth snaps shut.

“This is not the time for apologies,” he says, and even though it’s soft, the reprimand makes him flinch again.

“We would just like to know why, if you can tell us,” Mistress murmurs. “There’s no wrong answer, sweetheart. I promise. We just want to understand.”

Absently, Gabriel notices that he’s wringing his fingers in his lap, and he can’t remember when he’d started. He bites his lip as the quiet stretches, unable to meet their eyes. Why had he done it? His reasons seem stupid in retrospect.

“I-” The first attempt at an explanation dies in his mouth, and Gabriel makes a pathetic sound and falls lower on his knees. “I – I d-don’t know, I’m sorry, I’m -” he clamps a hand over his mouth before he can devolve into apologies again, doubling over at the waist. His Masters want an answer, so Gabriel has to give it to them. He has to. “I w-w-wanted to be g-good,” he gets out, with some difficulty. His breathing has gone short and quick again, and Gabriel can feel it, but he can’t stop it. “I’m sorry, Master,” he gasps. “I – I w-wanted to be better…”

“And you thought that hurting yourself would make you better?” Master’s voice is not judgmental, not irate. Just considering, calm and cool as he questions Gabriel. The boy latches onto the easy show of control, desperate for something steady and familiar against the maelstrom of emotions. He manages a nod, and a wet sniffle.

“But why did you think you needed to?” It’s Mistress again, and her voice is worried still, not like Master’s. “Did we… have we made you feel like you aren’t good?”

It’s a distressed sound, this time, that bubbles out of his chest. “N-no! No, Mistress, please. I don’t, I don’t d-deserve it, you’ve been – so kind, and – and so merciful, thank you, Masters, thank you.” Gabriel slinks a little closer, cowering at their feet like a kicked dog. “I w-wanted to be good,” he whimpers. “I want to be g-good, and I have to – I have to be t-taught, y-you have to -” And that sentence gets cut off immediately, because Gabriel knows full well that Master and Mistress don’t have to do anything. “Please,” he gasps instead. “I have t-to – I have to learn how to be good. And, and the pain will t-teach me, it’ll m-make sure I st-stay good…”

It’s probably the most words he’s ever spoken in one go, and Gabriel feels wrung-out after, bare and exposed. He can’t look at them from where he is, and he doesn’t try.

“Oh, sweetheart.” Mistress sounds pained. There’s movement, then, and Gabriel winces as he waits to be kicked onto his side, or for a foot to slam down on his fingers. Instead a soft presence crouches beside him, and then Mistress’s hands are on his shoulders, gently pulling him up.

Gabriel moves with the hands, and he only flinches a little when one of them cups his cheek.

“We haven’t really been helping with this, have we?” It sounds rhetorical, and sad, and Gabriel can only blink up at her. She’s still displeased, but she’s touching him so carefully, and that has to be good, right?

“Thank you for helping us understand,” Master says. After a moment he also comes down to sit on the floor, and Gabriel shrinks away, biting down on a little whine. Sometimes the Masters will allow him to kneel for them, or let him sit at their feet. But other times it’s like this, when they insist on lowering themselves to his level, and it always makes him feel like he’s doing something wrong.

The spot where Mistress had cupped his cheek is cold when her hand falls, and Gabriel winces and braces himself, waiting for the slap. Instead there is a gentle hand on his knee, coaxing his eyes open again.

“You’re not in trouble, little one,” Master tells him. Mistress is nodding, sitting relaxed and cross-legged, even though it must be uncomfortable in her heels - and has she not even had the chance to take them off?

Gabriel feels the shame burn even brighter at the sight. He’s disrupted their evening so completely, made a nuisance of himself… he can’t believe that he isn’t in trouble. Not after the mess he’s caused.

“You’re not in trouble, but I think we do need to make sure this doesn’t happen again.”

There is is, Gabriel thinks. The but that always follows reassurances. He’s not in trouble, they say, but there are contingencies. He only bows his head, ready to accept whatever measures they wish to put into place.

“You were trying to punish yourself in our stead… that’s right, isn’t it? That’s what you were trying to do?”

It’s so much worse when she says it like that. Gabriel can hear the presumptuousness of it, now; thinking that he could take that choice out of his owner’s hands, thinking that he deserved to deliver his own pain.

“Yes, Mistress,” he whispers hoarsely. That was exactly what he’d tried to do.

Mistress nods again, decisively this time, and she glances over at his Master for a moment. Confirmation passes between the two of them, and Gabriel gives a shiver and a little sob at how easily they decide his punishment.

“Breath, little one,” Mistress murmurs, and Gabriel drags in a heavy gulp of air and lets it out in a shudder.

“We’re not going to hurt you, bud.” Master has mostly let Mistress do the talking, but he seems to understand the conclusion they’ve come to. Gabriel’s heart stutters at the words, but he can only whine and shake his head. No. No, he was bad, he was bad and he deserved to be disciplined.

“I mean it,” his Mistress repeats, and there’s just a sliver of sharpness in her tone. Gabriel cowers under it, but she is firm, relentless. “ We mean it, little one. You aren’t in any trouble. However, I do think it’s time for a new rule.”

A new rule? Gabriel looks up quickly, a misplaced surge of hope sweeping through him. He can follow rules - that will make it easier to be good.

His Mistress nods and straightens her shoulders, and when she turns her attention back on Gabriel, he shivers under the command of it.

“You are not allowed to hurt yourself.” Gabriel is trembling softly, and he can only shiver and nod as she continues. “You are not to intentionally injure or harm yourself in any way. And if -” she pauses just for a moment, then, and Gabriel’s heart pauses with her. “If you feel like you deserve to be punished. If you think you’ve done something so bad that you need to be hurt.” His Mistress’s eyes bore into him with single minded intensity, and Gabriel feels stripped bare and raw underneath it. “If that happens, you are to come to one of us. You are not to deal with it alone. Come us, and we will help you. Understood?”

It’s a lot; there are a lot of words to sort through, but Gabriel tries, rewinding and replaying them in his head until he thinks he understands. They will not allow him to hurt himself, because the right to do so belongs to them. That makes sense, and finally understanding something feels like a weight coming off of his shoulders.

He’s not in trouble this time. But the next time he is, or the next time he starts to feel that awful, insidious itch under his skin - next time, he can tell them, and they will help alleviate that pressure. He understands that helping him is only discipline under a different name. But he is still grateful.

“I understand, Mistress,” he whispers. “Th-thank you, Mistress, for my rules.” There are tears starting to dry on his cheeks, and his Mistress reaches up and, with the utmost care, thumbs the salty stiffness away.

“Promise me you won’t scare us like that again,” she says, and Gabriel’s throat feels tight.

“I p-promise, Mistress.” He still can’t fathom why they aren’t angrier with him. He doesn’t know why he isn’t being punished, if his actions had displeased them so. But his Mistress looks relieved, and the last vestiges of tension are easing out of Master’s shoulders.

“Good boy,” his Master murmurs, and Gabriel’s breath catches. Can it truly be this easy?

The man is careful when he extends an arm in offering, and Gabriel only hesitates for a moment before slinking closer. In the earlier days with his Master and Mistress, Gabriel had feared their touch - and he knew that it could still bring great pain, if he earned it. But he had also come to understand that they might offer comfort…

And Gabriel likes the comfort.

He is familiar with the cozy space between Master’s side and arm, and Gabriel nestles into it, timidly curling up into the warmth. He can still hardly believe that the oncoming pain has been averted. But Master is gentle when he curls his arm around the boy, even though the strength in just that one appendage is enough to lift Gabriel clear off the ground if he chose to.

They’re still sitting on the ground, all three of them, and Mistress gets up only to sit down again on Gabriel’s other side, so he is sandwiched between them.

She tugs her shoes off and tosses them a little distance away, before yawning and leaning back against the base of the couch.

“Well then. If there are no objections… I think this is a perfect spot for movie night.” She reaches to tug the throw blanket and pillows off of the couch, and the next thing Gabriel knows, Master is gently guiding him forward so that Mistress can position a pillow behind his back. It’s so he has something to learn on, Gabriel realizes, and he lets it happen purely out of surprise.

He opens his mouth to object, and Mistress holds up a hand. “Ah ah. One moment, sweetheart.”

There are enough pillows for all of them, it seems, and by the time Mistress is done retrieving pillows (more pillows than had been on the couch to begin with, Gabriel is certain) they are cocooned in their own little nest.

Master still has an arm draped across him, and Mistress settles with a satisfied sigh, pressed soft and comforting against his other side.

“There we go. Doing okay, Gabe?”

Gabriel just blinks up at her for a long moment, at a complete loss for words. His shoulder throbs dully, but that is a pain so familiar that is easy to ignore. She is waiting for an answer, kind and patient, and somehow Gabriel knows that she would accept it if his answer was no.

He nods instead, and timidly leans into her fingers when she reaches up to stroke his hair.

“Okay. What are we feeling like watching tonight, Stefan? Something light, I think…”

His Master’s side rumbles with his response, and Gabriel eases into the familiar pattern slowly, nervously. He likes this part, when he can curl up warm and small and quiet, but it is hard to believe that it is real. He had been so afraid just moments before, but they are already moving on, as if his transgressions are something that can simply be forgotten about. As if his mistakes can be forgiven without penalty.

For just a moment, Gabriel feels that same itch under his skin, and his heart stops. But this time time when it tries to push it down, it goes. If he is bad, Master or Mistress will tell him, and they will deal out his punishment accordingly. It is not his place to decide. For the moment, he is warm, and held, and he’s been forgiven for his wrongdoings.

Gabriel has no idea which movie they end up putting on, but he is fast asleep within ten minutes, curled snugly into his Master’s side while his Mistress plays with his hair.

[END]

#bdhb #sarah writes bdhb #gabriel series #captivity whump #conditioning #creepy caretaking #sort of #fear #mention of self harm

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bytemycupcakes · 5 years ago

Text

Changeling!Pabit AU

I said I was makin a post and I don’t care that nobody seems interested in him cause I love this little puppet boy and wont stop making aus for him.

Under a cut cause l o n g e

-Pabit only ever remembers Boris as his caretaker

-Not unusual for a changeling, really but it’s true

-Boris always says he just found Pabit on a walk. People usually take that as a joke, but he’s being serious.

-Ya see, Pabit wandered a bit too far from the fae as an infant, and Boris almost tripped over him on a walk in the woods.

-Boris picked up this strange little faerie baby, they made eye contact, and Pabits body shifted to resemble Boris.

-Well fuck I guess Boris has a kid now. The thought of calling the local orphanage doesn’t even cross his mind, it’s really just, “Ah fuck I found a kid.. Guess I’m a dad then”

-Really the fact that Pabit seemed to latch onto and form to look like Boris didn’t help with that train of thought.

-It didn’t take long at all for it to click in Boris’ head that Pabit wasn’t human. Obviously the whole shapeshifting thing, but this child was practically FERAL.

-In a non-babyproofed home, Pabit wreaked havoc. Being a master at hiding, scuttering Boris’ walls, and getting into everything, especially things that a baby shouldn’t be touching.

-It took ages for Boris to get the house at least somewhat Pabit-proofed.

-Pabit still manages to get into shit constantly, it’s like a talent.

-Just like Child!Au, Pabit is not Pabit’s actual name, it’s a name he gained later on because of how much he mimics Boris. (Whats his actual name? No idea)

-Pabit’s gender was literally assigned. He doesn’t have typical human anatomy, being completely androgynous, and thus Boris just... -stamps Pabit with “boy” sticker-

-By the time of the habitat, Pabit id’s as masc non-binary

-Boris considers the day he found Pabit as his birthday, not actually knowing how old he was when found, he counts up from that date, thus where Pabit being 15 comes from.

-Pabit is so tall both because he is fae, and because his body mimics Boris for its aging. So he’s just.. so fucking tall.

-Pabit has a shadow form, but didn’t seem to gain one until he first saw Boris do it when he was a toddler.

-For awhile he’d just randomly shift to it, until his subconscious realized it was primarity an anger-based “transformation”

-While Boris’ shadow form is just intense anger, Pabit’s becomes almost like a rage. As his body grows to adapt most of his non-human ability (strength and some subtle basic magic) into said form.

-Depending on the source of anger, Pabit can be incredibly destructive or eerily calm but a ticking bomb.

-Even Boris gets a bit scared when Pabit shifts to the form... One too many times he’s had his house demolished from this child- Or even being injured by the rage (Nothing serious, but more damage than an 8 y/o should be able to give a grown man)

-From a very young age Pabit always showed signs of adhd/autism. Though he doesn’t technically have these conditions because he’s fae, he’s found comfort in knowing he’s not just really weird, and if people ask about it, he and Boris will just say he has ADHD and/or is autistic*

*[Lil step back: This whole au exists because I heavily project my adhd onto Pabit. And my girlfriend, who is autistic, loves the changeling trope (We even call her one fairly often). So please don’t get hateful about this]

-Boris was always pretty open about Pabit not being human, never tried to hide it from him. He grew up as the outcast and couldn’t figure out why, he’s not gonna let his son feel that same lost and broken feeling.

-Pabit tends to speak in broken sentences. He can speak in full, but feels more comfortable doing more of a Hulk speech pattern. Thus he often talks in third person, and leaves out words he deems unneeded to understand the sentence.

-He’ll fall into proper speech when ranting or infodumping, though. Speaking much more like Boris, with proper and large words.

-He stutters over bigger words a lot, and sometimes gets frustrated and just uses “dumbed down” language in its place (this is how he’ll describe it)

-Pabit has a major hyperfixation of puppetry and puppet making, and a smaller one on musical theatre/acting.

-There is Pabit, and then an actual puppet Habit. It was a gift for fathers day, and though it’s not as pretty as the irl puppet, it’s still pretty damn good for a 15 y/o with claws. Boris keeps it on a shelf in his office, it’s Pabits favorite out of all the puppets he’s made.

-Pabit will nab it and, using Boris’ desk as a stage, will just talk to Boris as “Boris”.

-Boris finds this absolutely adorable, and goes along with it. He’s made several business deals with this puppet. Usually for teeth.

-Which yes, Pabit eats. (No Pabit au is complete if he doesn’t eat teeth, fight me.)

-Pabit stims. A lot. His most common stims are kicking, bouncing, or wiggling his legs, chewing (Yes teeth eating is a stim for him, but he mostly goes for more rubbery textures), hand flapping, and full body wiggling/bouncing. He’ll also play with his hair, but it’s not as common.

-Pabit will occasionally repeat things, usually funny things he hears while giggling.

-Pabit’s hair is so stupidly thicc and curly that no stylist in town will deal with it.

-Boris has learned to cut hair, which comes in handy more often than you’d expect in a house of two very long-haired people.

-aka: Pabits hair grows so fucking fast, its ridiculous.

-His hair sticks together so much that it almost acts like one solid pillow-like mass. No hairtie can contain it. (If it’s tied back, it’s usually an actual string litterally tied around his hair)

-Pabits ears can emote, they don’t move much, but it’s noticeable. They wiggle when he gets really heccin happy.

-Pabit’s pupils alwas seem to be slitted, but at general shock (among other various things) his iris’ will slit aswell, leaving Pabit with a line in some massive sclara’s.

-Pabit has gotten very good at sewing thanks to his love of puppet making. This becomes very useful since he usually has to tailor his clothes slightly.

-In the habitat proper, Pabit is surprisingly popular with all the kids. Most notably Tim Tam and Trevor.

-He knew Trevor (And of Nat) before the habitat. He and Trevor are classmates while Nat is in the class behind them.

-Trevor didn’t really acknowledge Pabit’s existence until he bit a bully and seemed to break skin effortlessly??? hmmmmmmmm.

-Thus Trevor started theorizing, nothing in depth, but the kid was on his radar.

-Trevor was really surprised to find Pabit in the habitat, and even more surprised when Pabit told him Boris is his dad.

-The most these two ever talked before the habitat was a single “peer review” assignment, but in the habitat they start talking a lot more cause they’re the oldest kids, know eachother a bit, and both need to infodump like crazy.

-It takes a while for Trevor to get used to Pabits broken speech, but he eventually finds himself mimicing it occasionally. and Pabit will mimic him as well (adhd solidarity, boys)

-Pabit and Tim Tam can communicate non-verbally with no trouble at all. Thus this is used to wreak so much havoc on habititians since they’re both feral little goblins.

-It doesn’t help that Pabit has special access to “employees only” areas since he’s Boris’ son.

-Trevor and Pabit have gone on massive theory rants about random musicals while Nat’s in the room and she just watches these two in confused awe because of all the little details they’ll pull out to support these wild theories.

-Nat seriously has no idea how these two can just. keep. going. It’s been three hours at least let her have a snack!

-Pabit has allowed Trevor to ask so many weird questions about him because Pabit is also very curious about what exactly he is.

-Boris isn’t going to question why Trevor was poking at Pabit’s ribcage with a pen and just let boys be boys.

-Nat supplies Trevor with books on mythical beings she steals from Trencils room.

-Even with the three of them mostly working together, they cant figure out exactly what Pabit is.

-Until they’re all going over it in the boiler room one day. Where Wallus can hear them.

-YES ONCE AGAIN WALLUS IS NOT HUMAN! AGAIN, FIGHT ME.

-Did three children just lure out the frightened janitor cause they’re describing changelings and Wallus, a fae, knows about these kinda things? Yes. Yes they did.

-Wallus really never got a good look at Pabit before he took refuge in the wall, Pabit never got too involved in his work, or his talks with Boris. So Wallus isn’t too surprised that he missed it.

-It takes a bit of courage building from Wallus and Pabit litterally dragging him to Boris’ office before Wallus talks to Boris about how he aquired Pabit.

-Lots of details short: Wallus actually remembers when Pabit went missing which is pretty neat.

-Boris was almost worried he’d lose Pabit to his birth parents... Until Wallus says they didn’t really worry too much cause he was supposed to be put into someones life anyway. Was only mildly concerning since the fae couldn’t keep an eye on him.

-Pabit barely processes any of this information. Same with nearly all fae information Wallus tells him.

-Its not that he doesn’t like it or anything, he just doesn’t really care about the details. He got a name for what he is and why he acts like he does, and now he’s done. Mission complete.

[I wanna type more but my adhd is being MEAN so I’ll stop here for now. Feel free to send me asks about this au tho cause I love it]

EDIT:

-One last thing: Pabit loves the night. He adores the moon. He loves sitting on the roof past bedtime just to stare at the sky

#smile for me #smile for me Pabit #smile for me au #sfm au #Boris Habit #sfm boris habit #Sfm Pabit #Puppet Habit #Trevor Garbo #wallus breadbear #Tim Tam #Nat Vancy

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