#my trial is up tomorrow and that makes me sad

[excalibur-gone-missing]

Paring: LSM x fem!reader 

Requested: No

Genre:  soulmates!au, angst

Warning(s):  sad

Summary: Seokmin loves love. But love doesn't love him back.

Word count:  788

Other works 

disclaimer: this is not the exact representation of the subjects in real life. I just use them for my inspiration. 

a/n: I would greatly appreciate it if all of you could take a moment to comment on this fic. As an author, I find great value in your feedback, as it allows me to better comprehend my readers, and I thoroughly enjoy interacting with all of you. Constructive criticism is always welcome, so don't hesitate to talk about this fic or send me an ask. So please don’t be a silent reader.

a/n2: I don't know if I will make this into a series, but do tell me if you want me to do so!

[permanent taglist] [only for those interested, don’t fill the form otherwise]

Seokmin loves love. He looks at young lovers in the park sitting on a bench, leaning on each other or holding hands, and he hopes they stay like that forever. Hell, if he could, his official profession would be matchmaking. But after a bit of a trial run during his uni days, the man understood that he is horrendous at it. He has more chances of pairing Mingyu’s socks than pairing two humans. What can he say—he just likes to bring people together. The only problem is that he’s far more impatient than an alpha particle roaming around in a chamber.

Now, it must not come as a shock to you that this man has indeed fallen in love and, like most of us in this universe, has had his heart broken too. I mean, it was his fault for falling in love with a woman who had another man’s name written in the script of her fate. But hey, love is love. You never understand when it will attack, and, being the defenseless fool you are, you just fall for it.

Seokmin understands it was never meant to be, but that doesn’t mean he loved her any less. Unlike most, he was devoted to Somin. He loved her like a poet loves his poem, like the paper loves its pen, like the sunflower loves the sun. He remembers how his world would light up the minute she came into his peripheral vision. He loved her with every breath he took and every drop of water he drank.

But like every other forbidden relationship, this one didn’t last. Somin found her fated mate, her soulmate. And just like water melting from a glacier, she seeped away from his life with a sad look of apology toward Seokmin and an enchanting smile for her one and only.

Was Seokmin sad? Obviously, he was! Who wouldn’t be? That night, he drank like there was no tomorrow, and Chan still brings it up sometimes: “Hyung looked like he wanted to crush that new dude of his ex, but also looked scared when he remembered his face.” I mean, obviously, that man was built like a truck. As much as Seokmin claims he likes to do push-ups and lift, he could never be the hunk of a man Seungcheol is. Never!

But even after all that, he could never get angry at anyone. It was his and solely his fault for falling in love with a woman who was not fated to be his. The blame falls on him, no one else. They had promised to be each other’s forever, but somewhere deep down, he knew it wouldn’t last. He knew that all those talks were just talks. So when the inevitable happened, he wasn’t angry at her—just happy. No matter how brutally she broke his heart, she deserved to be loved the right way, and so did her soulmate. He would have broken off the relationship anyway the minute he knew about Seungcheol—no questions asked.

Now, this brings us to this very gloomy, rainy day at the bus stop. Seokmin hates the rain; it reminds him of tears, and he hates to see the sky cry. But everyone’s gotta cry once in a while, so he’ll let it go this time.

This is when he feels it—the sting on his back where his mark is. The beautiful fish painted on his skin feels alive. Not even a minute after the sting, he feels it—the pull, the pull to look at the passengers getting off the bus.

That’s when he sees her: the literal definition of beauty and grace, the beautiful butterfly in this gloomy world. His one and only soulmate. You.

That’s when you look at him, feeling the pull too. It seems as though the world has stopped for Seokmin. Time has allowed him this moment to stare at you and take in your grace and beauty. And suddenly, he realizes you’re heading straight for him. Straightening his back, he looks at you expectantly, hoping to hear your name pour out of those beautiful, glossy, plump lips of yours. And then he sees them move. But he doesn’t understand what you’re saying, because your beauty has rendered him speechless.

Then he hears the words—those ominous words that will haunt him for the rest of his life, maybe even eternity: “I don’t believe in soulmates, so let’s never fucking meet each other again, ever!”

And before the boy can even process the words you’ve just thrown at him, you’re walking away. And just like that, the Seoul rush engulfs you like a sea monster, not letting Seokmin reach you to at least ask why.

a/n: thank you so much for reading, please don’t forget to leave a review

[inafieldofdaisies]

Character Cards: In Hope of Tomorrow & A Trial of Errors |  Template by @marissources

WIP Whenever Tag | Tagged by @nightbloodbix @corvosattano @direwombat @socially-awkward-skeleton

Tagging, @strangefable @strafethesesinners @unholymilf @florbelles @euryalex @g0dspeeed @aceghosts @voidika @theelderhazelnut @purplehairsecretlair @clicheantagonist @cassietrn @adelaidedrubman @josephslittledeputy @josephseedismyfather @trench-rot @onehornedbeast @harmonyowl @shellibisshe @madparadoxum @macs-babies @carlosoliveiraa @wrathfulrook @dumbassdep and anyone with something to share <3

[fingertipsmp3]

What in Christ am I even going to wear to work. Like.

[tsukimefuku]

in another life :: higuruma hiromi

summary: the day before keita's trial, you and higuruma meet by chance in a small cafe.

cw: angst, canon compliant.

wc: 1k

notes etc.: I had the big sad and decided to turn it into everyone else's problem too. sorry, have my angst though.

In another life, I would've loved doing laundry and taxes with you

Higuruma wasn’t one to stare, but the moment you looked back at him sitting by the counter and smiled, he realized his gaze must have lingered on you longer than he anticipated. He quickly averted his eyes elsewhere, fumbling around with Keita's case files on the table before taking the cup of coffee and giving it a big gulp. He felt somewhat silly to be gazing at a random woman in a random cafe one day before Keita’s second trial, but oh well, here he was.

You happened to be at Morioka for the past week, still working as an underground healer using your RCT, glad enough that Jujutsu High hadn't caught up with you. This was your last day in Morioka before leaving for Hokkaido, for yet another job, and your mind wandered around until you noticed this man looking at you. 

You saw him when he came inside the cafe, carrying a big briefcase, some folders with what seemed to be piles of papers inside, and the most tired, exhausted face you had ever seen on anyone. He had a black suit on, wore a black tie and had a tiny pin on his lapel. The man, however, didn’t seem to notice you eyeing him as he put down his order for a single cup of black coffee before taking himself and his papers to a table in the farthest corner of the place.

Maybe it was the fact that you'd be leaving the city in a few hours, or that you instantly found him to be charming in an understated way, but you grabbed your own latte and walked towards the man, not failing to notice there was an empty seat in front of him.

”Hey,” you called, pulling his eyes towards you, “is this seat taken?”

Higuruma was surprised, confused, and wondered if maybe you wanted to take the chair to use on another table.

”No, it’s not.”

”Great. Can I sit with you?”

Now he felt even more confused.

”Why?”

You chuckled a little, and cocked your head to the side.

”Because I saw you staring at me, and would like to tell you I was staring at you too when you walked in. That should be a nice conversation starter.”

Oh, caught red handed, he thought to himself. That’s what you get from getting distracted instead of working.

”I...” he began, wanting to say he was about to start working, that he was busy and couldn’t possibly entertain any type of company, but out of his mouth simply came “yes, you can.”

Satisfied, you pulled the chair and sat with him, not placing your beverage on the table to avoid the risk of an accident involving your coffee and his seemingly very important papers.

”So, change of scenery? Came to work at a cafe for the day?” you asked, leaning back.

He seemed out of his element - something he probably was. Higuruma couldn’t recall the last time he went on a date sandwiched in between his gruesome working hours. Having an attractive woman sitting with him and asking him questions was definitely not on the list of things that might happen when he stepped foot out of his apartment that morning.

”Yes, I was feeling trapped inside the office,” Higuruma mindlessly replied, putting his papers down for a moment, “I’m concerned about this trial tomorrow and wanted to read these files again.”

Then, it clicked. The suit, the pin - that now, up close, was clearly a sunflower - and the put upon face.

”Oh, you’re a lawyer?”

He nodded. “You?”

”I’m a nurse,” was the trained answer you already had for when people asked you that. “What about this case is making you nervous?”

You had no idea why you were asking this man so many questions, but he seemed unendingly interesting to you. Something about him just drew you in.

He scratched the bridge of his hooked nose for a second, apparently pondering on his next words.

”I’m afraid my client, who was relieved to be acquitted the first time around, might end up getting crushed by the cogs of the criminal justice system.”

”Oh, so you’re a criminal lawyer?”

”Yes.”

”Wow. That’s...”

Crazy in a country with such a high conviction rate. Delusional. Dangerous.

”Admirable.”

He was taken aback, and his eyes widened a little as you both locked gaze.

”I mean, Japan has a very high conviction rate, right? I read it somewhere,” you noted, taking a sip from your latte.

”Yes. 99%, in fact.”

”99%?!” you exclaimed.

He nodded and kept silent, realizing how ludicrous that was. The fact that only 1% of criminally pursued cases ended up in acquittals. After so many years, one can get accustomed to any and every type of absurdity, it seems.

“Why do you do it?” you asked him.

”Because I have a terrible habit of not being able to ignore unfair situations. If I see someone being a victim of injustice, I just have to do something about it.”

“And how has that been working out for you?”

Higuruma thought about it for a moment, yet no words came to him. He could feel himself slipping away, but denied the very notion that working with what made him feel fulfilled was the same thing that was silently chipping away at his soul, one wrongful conviction at a time.

Realizing you might’ve hit a nerve, you thought it’d be better to change the approach, asking, “is your client innocent? The one who’ll be retried tomorrow?”

Higuruma acquiesced. “Yes, yes he is.”

You sighed, and with one big gulp, finished your coffee.

”Life isn’t fair anywhere, but I’m glad there are people like you trying to tip the scales back in place,” you told him, sparing him a warm smile.

He was slightly embarrassed, not knowing how to respond to the compliment.

”And you said you were a nurse, right? Why?”

You sighed and shrugged, “I wish I had the same ‘this is what I’ve always wanted’ drive, but it’s just where life pushed me towards.”

“And why did you wish you had the same drive?”

“Because... I guess, it’s because I only became a nurse after losing everything and everyone I wanted to keep in my life. There was nothing else for me to do.”

This seemed like an oddly intimate conversation to be having with a random stranger, but it felt comforting in a way. His attentive eyes, probably from years of hearing clients crying and pleading, never seemed to look past you. They stated, silently, I’m listening. I see you. 

“I don’t think that’s true,” he noted, being someone able to pry out the truth out of people even when they didn’t realize they were lying - to someone else or to themselves.

”What do you mean?”

”You’re what? In your mid twenties? Early thirties?”

You were confused. “Hm... Yes?” Is this some kind of pick up line?

”You probably had some years to acclimate yourself to that profession. You answered me quickly when I asked, which suggests that you’re accustomed to telling people you’re a nurse for a while now. What I mean to say is that you look at peace with that choice, and I’d guess you haven't tried changing careers or anything of the sort.”

The man really read you like an open book, and you were speechless, widening your eyes a little.

”I’ll take that as a confirmation to what I’ve just said,” he stated, noting your silence.

You scoffed and chuckled a little, realizing that you were now the one figuratively getting surprised with a random person butting themselves in your table. 

“I... I think I do enjoy healing people, even though it takes a toll on me, sometimes.”

Higuruma didn’t notice how his coffee had gone cold by this point, his papers now forgotten as you both talked for a good while.

”What did you mean when you said you lost everything before becoming a nurse?”

Your mouth fell agape, but no words came out. In a second, trying to look elsewhere to mask your uncomfortable feeling, you took a quick look at your watch, realizing that you had been chatting for a very long time. You had to run or you’d miss your train.

“Oh, that’s a conversation for another day, lawyer man, I have a train to catch.”

”Another day, huh?” he inquired, and you smiled, aware that he understood what that meant. 

You definitely wanted to see him again.

You pulled up a paper note, writing your name and number on it. Swiftly, you offered him the paper, and he took it from your hands, reading it.

”Now you have my name and my number. What should I call you?”

”Higuruma Hiromi.”

“It was nice to meet you, Higuruma Hiromi, criminal defense lawyer.”

He was surprised to realize how much he liked hearing his name in your voice. He hadn’t had what felt like genuine conversation for a very long time, and could say he was even pleased you had butt in his work to probe him around with questions.

He felt heard and seen, too.

“I unfortunately really have to go now, I’m leaving for Hokkaido for a few days,” you stated, blushing slightly before proceeding, “but you should give me a call.”

He nodded your way, and for the first time during this entire interaction, actually spared you a smile.

”Okay.”

***

It had been probably hours that Higuruma laid inside this full bathtub reminiscing on the last days of normalcy before his fallout. He suddenly remembered the day prior to Keita’s conviction, and how he met you at that cafe.

It all felt like a faint dream of events that happened years ago, and not something that had taken place only a few weeks prior.

Maybe I should’ve called her. I wonder if she’s safe.

He got the gist of the Culling Games from kogane, especially the fact that the Games didn’t stretch so far as to Hokkaido. Pulling him from apathy, he felt the mildest hint of concern and hope, expecting you’d be actually safe, given you were leaving for Hokkaido that afternoon.

At Hokkaido, you followed the news about the Culling Games, glad you had been out of the ground zero when shit went down. You wondered if the people you met in the past - friends and acquaintances, mostly - were alright, and for a second, the image of that lawyer came into your mind.

You wondered if he was safe too.

Unfortunately, only one of you two would be proven right. 

written by tsukimefuku ㋡ comments and reblogs are appreciated. do not copy, translate or repost. copycatting is for losers.

[marvelobsessed134]

Season of the witch

This is part of my spooky summer series! You can find the masterlist on the pinned post on my page!

Sorry this took so long but here we are!

Parings: Judge!Bucky Barnes x Witch!Reader

Warnings: 1600s!au, Salem witch trials, historical inaccuracy, unbalanced power dynamics, sex in exchange for freedom, teasing, and I think that’s it.

You sat in your cell alone and sighed. You were going to be hung tomorrow for all to see. It was sad, really. But you didn’t have a choice. The witchcraft rumors were true so, here you are.

You looked down at your dress. At least it was nice looking. Your hair resting on your shoulder in a braid. Hearing footsteps approaching you looked up to find none other than Bucky Barnes, your town’s main judge for the court. And for these executions.

“You’re not supposed to execute me till tomorrow.” You stated matter of factly as you stood up fast, as soon as he was approaching your cell.

“I know. That’s what I came to talk to you about.”

“What? Are you going to let me have a last meal? If so I’d like a buttered toast with-“

“Silence!” He shouted. His shouts echoed through the empty jail. Yeah, so you got caught after all the other women who were accused met their fate. So you’re the only one here.

You shut your mouth immediately.

He unlocked the cell door and stepped inside, stalking towards you before pinning you against the wall. Your corset feeling a little more tighter than usual, your tits popping up right into his chest.

“Let me have you, and you can walk away free.”

You gulped, trying to ignore the feeling between your legs, “Really? You promise?”

“Yes, my dear. I promise.” And he pressed his lips against yours. You moaned into the kiss as you kissed back, feeling his bulge against your crotch. The brunette moved his arms behind you and roughly pulled your corset apart, tossing it on the stone floor and immediately taking your tits in his hands.

He sucked and bit your sensitive buds making your moans echo through the empty space. “As soon as I saw you,” he whispered as he tweaked your nipples, “I knew you were too pretty to die.” You moaned as he continued to assault your nipples.

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful.” He hissed before lifting the skirt of your dress up and pulling down your undergarments.

He quickly took his cock out of his pants and teasingly rubbed the tip against your entrance. “Please.” You begged.

Bucky smirked, “Yeah? You want it?”

“Please Judge Barnes.”

That got him to slide inside of your wet cunt as he filled you to the brim. “Oh fuck! You’re so tight!” The brunette groaned as he thrusted in and out of you, gripping your hips tightly. You gripped onto his shoulders, your nails digging into the skin.

You were both moaning messes as he repeatedly hit your g spot. Bucky started to rub your clit with his thumb as he fucked you, sending you over the edge. “I’m almost there!” You cried.

“Yeah? You gonna cum darling?” He teased as he moved faster and faster, till you clenched around his cock and squirted all over him. It didn’t take long for him to finish as well, shooting his hot load inside of you.

Once he pulled out you immediately put your undergarments back on and he tucked his cock back in his pants. He caressed your face lovingly before giving you a passionate kiss, “Don’t worry, my love. You’ll be out of here by the morning.”

[louloulemons-posts]

Oil At The Coffee Shop V

Eddie X Fem!Reader

Summary : Someone new comes to work at the shop and you see Eddie again.

Word Count : 2.7k

Warnings : Not proofread, no use of Y/N, petnames, sad eddie, wayne comforts him, cuteness, fluff, more eddie x reader in this part.

Fic Masterlist

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

“Oh uh Hi,” you spoke awkwardly, trying not to stare. “Hi,” he grunted, taking a one step back, then fully retreating to his room. “I uh, I think that’s my cue to leave,” you said to Wayne.

“I hate to admit it, but I think you’re right Honey. Thank you for stopping by and for the treats.”

“Thank you for the tea, it was nice seeing you again Mr Mun-,” he gave you a raised brow, “Wayne.”

“You too Honey, I’ll be sure to stop by the shop soon.” You hummed, bidding the man goodnight and went back to your car, only then noticing Eddies van around the back of the trailer.

Well you had tried to make things better, but could only feel like you’d just made them a whole lot worse.

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

His body was screaming, his head was too. He ripped the towel off his body, running to his draws to find clothes. Throwing on a pair of sweatpants he paused in front of the mirror.

They were everywhere. Thick pale marks coated his skin, from his neck to his legs. Completely covered, they hadn’t faded in the last year. He let out a sob.

Falling to the floor he felt arms wrap around him, “It’s okay, Wayne’s got you. Ain’t nobody gonna hurt you again, I got you son, I got you,” the man spoke into his curls.

He didn’t know why he was crying. Maybe because she’d seen his ugliness and her face hadn’t changed. There was no malice. No disgust. Just surprise at him being there.

He’d been so cruel. So horrible. Shouted at her. Hurt her feelings. She just wanted to be kind and he pushed her away. Did that make him a monster too?

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

Sunday rolled around, the last sunlight of Summer dancing through the windows. Robin had been right, Steve called her this morning inviting her to a barbecue on Tuesday night. Which she happily accepted.

Opening another box, she emptied out more take away coffee cups and lids, taking the back stock to the storage room. The bell on the door rang, “Sorry we’re closed,” you said, walking to the main shop floor.

You smiled at who you came across, “Max! What are you doing here, it’s your day off!” you playfully scolded. “I have someone I want you to meet, this is El. She’s a friend of mine and is looking for a job.”

“Nice to meet you Honey,” you introduced yourself to the curly haired girl with dark ways. “Wait El? Your Hopper and Joyce’s daughter?” She nodded, a small smile on her face. “It’s nice to finally meet you, so do you have any experience?”

“Uh not really, but I’m a quick learner.”

“She’s a good baker, maybe she could help more with the pastries and cakes. Her and Joyce make the best banana bread,” Max told you.

You noticed how the redhead had decided to wear her glasses today - she wasn’t lying when she said her body needed to rest.

“Well if you’re not busy tomorrow, you’re more than welcome to have a trial morning. Me and Max can show you the ropes.”

“I would really like that.”

“Great I’ll see you both at 8am, now go and enjoy the rest of your day,” you ushered them out of the store, hushing Max when she said she’d stay and help with unloading and restocking.

You had to bake a lot today, things that needed to cool over night and be finished tomorrow. Along with changing up the Weekly Special menu, adding your aunts famous Pecan Pie with Maple Ice-cream.

Tying your hair up, you put on your apron and washed your hands. Preparing to bake cakes, and cookies along with many different fruity turnovers (mainly cherry).

Along with that you made some sandwich fillings, like pesto and put some meets into cook. It was a busy, warm and productive day. You knew Callie would be proud, you knew Scotty and the rest of your family would be too.

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

When your alarm went off at 6:30 you whined, not wanting to leave the soft comfort of your bed. Pulling yourself up you headed straight to the bathroom, washing your face, and brushing your teeth.

Sliding on a tighter pair of dark slacks, you tucked in your long sleeved white top, rolling the sleeves to your elbows. Tying your hair up and putting on your work shoes.

Taking a punnet of cherries out of the fridge, you headed down to the shop. Switching on the lights, you headed to the kitchen. The ovens were on straight away and you began finishing off what you began the day before.

Shortly after a knock came at the front door, heading it you were greeted by Max and El. “Morning ladies.”

“Morning,” El spoke in a sing song tone.

“Hm,” Max grunted, you’d learnt she didn’t enjoy an early rise.

You also noticed how she wore her glasses again. “Okay, so Max if you could make a start on getting the chairs down and starting up the coffee machine. I’m going to explain to El and show her the basics.”

The red head nodded, yawning into her hand and walked over to the chairs and tables. “Follow me,” you smiled at El. “So here is the kitchen, Max said you’re good at baking so you may become familiar with it very soon.

“People tend to have fruit and warm drinks in the mornings, so savoury you don’t have to worry about until the afternoon. Where I really need you is the counter - helping Max with taking orders and drinks.”

You picked up a finished tray of cookies, and heading back to the front. “You’ll be shadowing Max for today, mainly writing orders and helping her out with coffees and other hot drinks. I’ll show you how to do the cash too.”

After giving the girl a quick run down of what she had to do she smiled. “I think I can do that,” she spoke, her tone very gentle.

“Good, it’ll be great to have you. If you have any questions feel free to ask. I’m just going to finish up in the back, so you can help Max carry on setting up.”

She nodded and walked to her friend, who was labelling cakes. The pair fell into easy conversation, it was nice to see, the only ‘girlfriend’ you’d had was Diane, but she was an in-law, so you didn’t know if it counted.

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

Monday and Tuesday went around quickly, El did amazing on her training and started full time later on in the week. She wasn’t lying when she said she was a quick learner.

Her and Max worked great together too, you were a bit scared that they’d stand and chat all day, but they were hard workers. You were now headed to Steve’s for his barbecue.

He had said you’d meet his friends again along with some others. Max and El would be there, along with Lucas. You were looking forward to it, but could only assume that Eddie would be there - your stomach turned at the thought.

You understood why he panicked you really did, his scars weren’t anything to be ashamed off. You knew that, they’re healed wounds, but maybe Eddie was still healing from what caused them.

Pulling up to Steve’s you saw Jonathan’s car, along with Steve’s and Vickies. Eddies van nowhere to be seen. Heading to the door you knocked a few times.

“You made it!” Steve said, as he opened the door and gave you a huge hug. “You knew I was coming!” you laughed, allowing him to lead you inside. “Everyone’s out back, I’ll introduce you.”

The garden was full of new faces and familiar ones. Jonathan waved at you, coming over to greet you. “Hey,” he smiled, giving you a hug. “How’s it going?”

“Good how are you settling in?”

“I’ve jumped right into it so it’s great.”

A voice shouted your name, “Hey Robin.”

She came to you, her fingers linked with Vickies. “I wanted to formally introduce you to my wonderful girlfriend, Vickie.”

“Yeah introduce her before you get over the limit of tipsy,” Steve teased.

“Shut up Dingus,” she said, pinching the boys side. “It’s nice to meet you properly,” you said.

“You too, sorry we couldn’t last time. Bambi legs and all,” she motioned to Robin, which made you chuckled. “Hey Steve who’s this?” a curly haired teen asked.

Steve introduced you, “This is Dustin.”

“Nice to meet you,” you said.

“You’re the one everyone’s been talking about!” he exclaimed.

“Dude don’t make her uncomfortable,” Steve nudged him.

“Sorry,” he said, before turning to his friends and shouting, “Guys come here and meet her!” You face flushed slightly, but you calmed when you saw the familiar faces of Max, El and Lucas.

“Hi guys,” you waved to them. They all greeted you back. There were two more boys with them, one slightly familiar and another you were unsure of. “This is Mike,” El said.

Ah Nancy’s brother. “It’s nice to meet you Mike.”

“And you.”

“And this is my Will,” Jonathan spoke from beside you. “Oh my gosh, no way!” you exclaimed. “You’ve gotten so big!”

“It’s been a while,” he laughed shyly.

“Now all the introductions are done, would you like a beer?” he asked.

“Just the one,” you smiled. “I’m just going to say hi to Nancy and Argyle,I’ll come see you guys in a bit,” you said to the younger teens.

“How’s it going guys.” You say down next to Argyle, smiling at the pair. “Babe! It’s so good to see you again,” the boy gave you a smile, his eyes slightly red. “You too,” you smiled and the thoroughly relaxed boy.

“It’s nice to see you,” Nancy spoke.

“You too, oh my gosh I read your article yesterday. It was so interesting!” You had discovered that Nancy was a journalist for the local newspaper.

Jonathan often took the photos that would appear above her pieces, on the side of his own job. Steve plonked himself besides you, handing you a beer and resting his head on your shoulder.

“How’s Scott?” he asked.

“Good.”

“The kids?”

“Good.”

“Missing them?”

“Like you wouldn’t believe,” you sighed. Letting your head rest on his own.

“They’ll have to come and visit soon, they could all stay here. I have enough room,” he motioned to the large house. “I’ll tell him next time we talk.”

Steve went to continue talking when you heard more greetings being exchanged. “Munson! My man you made it!” Steve smiled, greeting the boy, you’d been so nervous to see.

Dressed in an old band tee, some jeans, a leather jacket. Your stomach flipped but in a very different way that you didn’t understand. You jumped when someone whispered in your ear, “Did you manage to make up?” Max.

“Well I spoke to Wayne. I need to talk to Eddie,” you told her quietly. She nodded and walked away from you, wrapping her arms around the taller boy. “Hey Red,” he smiled, like actually smiled.

He had deep smile lines near his mouth, dimples that sat perfectly on his cheeks, and slight crinkles by his eyes that you knew would result in crows feet as he got older.

It was beautiful.

Sharing greetings with everyone else, he spoke to you, “Hi,” he said.

“Hi.”

“How are you?”

“I’m doing good, you?”

“Good.” You nodded and he hummed. It was awkwardly silent.

“Well let’s start grilling,” Steve broke the tension. “I’ll come help,” you said, walking to the house with the boy. “What the hell was that?” he asked, raising his brow.

“What was what?”

“You and Eddie in the garden. What the hell?”

“It was nothing.” You began putting peppers, onions and tomatoes on skewers to make kebabs.

“Oh my god you like him!” You dropped a piece of pepper. “N-no I don’t!”

“Okay you think he’s cute at least and don’t even deny it I saw how goo-goo eyed you went when he was with Max.”

“Oh my god shush.”

“It’s true then.”

“This conversations done, go start the fire you shit head.”

“Okay okay, but we’re talking about this again.”

“Yeah yeah, whatever you say.”

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

You were all sat around together, some people on the ground and others on loungers, all happily munching away on delicious food.

“So you’re running the cafe?” Dustin spoke to you. “Yeah, along with Max and now El.”

Everyone smiled at that, proud of the pair of them. “How come you moved here?” he asked, taking a bite out of his food.

“Oh uh,” you began to speak.

“You don’t have to answer that,” Steve said, giving Dustin a stern look. “No it’s okay, I inherited the shop when my Aunt Callie passed, but I could only move recently.”

“Steve said you used to be a decorator.”

“I did. I decorated the whole store with his help.”

“In one week?”

“Mhm.”

“And now two of our friends work with you?”

“They do.”

“Do we get friend discounts?”

“If I say yes will you stop making me feel like I’m being interrogated by Hop?”

“Sure.”

“Then yes, you can have a friend discount.”

“Wicked.” You chuckled at the boy, he had nerve you’d give him that.

Everyone laughed at the interaction between the pair of you and the evening went on. Helping Steve clear up plates and wrap up leftovers you hear and squeal and a splash followed by, “LUCAS!”

“You coming in?” Steve asked, motioning to the water. “Probably not, might just roll up my jeans and dip my feet.”

“Fair enough,” he shrugged, taking a swig of his beer.

You did just that, sliding off your shoes and socks. Rolling up your jeans a few times, you laughed at the younger kids, currently playing chicken in the water. Max on Lucas’ shoulders and Will on Mikes.

Robin and Vickie were lounging away, smiling at one another. Argyle taking a drag of a cigarette that clearly wasn’t just a cigarette. Dustin and Steve stood in the water chatting. El held onto the side, talking to her big brother and his girlfriend.

Everyone seemed so content.

“Hi,” A voice came from behind you. Turning you head you spoke, “Hi.” It was Eddie, he began to get down next to you. “I um … I was just wondering if we could talk?”

“Yeah of course.”

Meeting the ground next to you, he sat with his knees up to his chest. “Before you say anything, I just want to say I’m sorry,” you said quickly, before he got a word out.

“Y-you’re sorry? What on earth for?”

“Well I didn’t mean to offended you, and then I was rude and then I was just at your home.”

“Sweetheart I was a dick to you. I snapped at you just because I felt insecure. You’ve been nothing, but kind and I’ve taken advantage of that. I can only apologise.”

“You have nothing to apologi-“

“Yes I do, and the trailer. I’m sorry I ran away. I just wasn’t expecting you to get there and um … my scars aren’t the nicest thing to see.”

“There’s nothing wrong with them. They’re pretty fucking cool actually. I noticed your tattoos too. How many do you have?” He seemed taken aback by your reply, “Oh uh, I’ve lost count now, when I remember I’ll let you know.”

“I’m thinking of getting one, right here,” you motioned to a space on your upper forearm. “Oh yeah, what would you get?”

“I’m looking for inspiration.”

“It’s where my first one is,” he said.

“Really?” He nodded, pulling his arm out of his jacket. His shirt was long sleeved so he rolled it up slightly so you could see. It was a demonic looking puppet with a hand controlling it.

“Wow that’s so cool,” you said, gently tracing the line work. You could feel the bumps and dips of scaring as you did so. His breath hitched and you met his gaze. Deep chocolate eyes. “Sorry,” you whispered.

“What does it mean?”

“I don’t know. Just thought it was really fucking metal.” You huffed a laugh at that, “It is, fucking metal.”

“Hey Sweetheart?” He said, rolling down his sleeve and tugging his jacket back on.

“Hm?”

“Do you think we could start over?” he asks. You smiled, introducing yourself to him. “I’m Eddie,” he grinned.

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

A/N: 👀👀👀

Thank you so much for reading 🤍

taglist : @corrodedseraphine @flawiette @witchwolflea @emxxblog @plk-18 @vintagehellfire

let me know if you want to be added 🤍

[memyselfandmya]

RAW REACTIONS TO JWCT

Spoilers below the cut, and warning it's long. My thoughts are all over the place rn so you'll get more organized posts tomorrow

Ep. 1

“Just the one.” FML

Darius you’re such a funny little guy

“I’m not talking about the island I’m talking about what happened after.” AHHHHHHH. The way this line was delivered and animated.

The family photos on the wall feel so symbolic. 

It’s sad how Darius has to go through this process of grief again.

What’s Brand doing to get himself into trouble?

*soft music plays* “And here with me live are the improbable survivors of the Jurassic World incident, the Nublar Six” CAN YOU HEAR ME FUCKING SOBBING.

Ben scrunched over that little compute please I can’t 😭

What’s especially sad about Darius’ grief is that he’s not just sad and depressed as if he’s accepted her death, it’s that he pushed himself into a sort of state of almost denial where he’s still calling her and stuff.

These raptors are freaky

1st episode over yayyyy

Ep. 2

Not the keys Darius 

The tensionnn

Ben and his driving skills 

Ben’s poor van

Ben still being the well prepared man he is

Ben…I’m concerned what is that board you have going on there

Why are these grown ass men living such horrible lives? Eating canned cheese out of a dirty mug? A spoon in a boot that makes sloshing noise?

Ben back at it w the shaving cream/ whipped cream. 

Darius is so unconvinced

BEN throwing Darius phone out like it was nothing plssss and his reaction 

BROOKLYNN I MISS YOU 

She’s so pretty though

Very ominous great way to emphasize Ben’s paranoia 

These poor traumatized kids

“Is your friend okay?” “No.” PLSS I’m glad he knows it

THE FUCKING FORESHADOWING 

OH THE SUSPENSE 

Ep. 3

Sammy’s ranch is so cuteeee

SAMMY MI AMOR THEIR REUNION IS JUST SO PRECIOUS 

The locs thing omg 

“Have you seen my pitchfork” she asks casually as if she’s a witch hunter during the Salem witch trials 

What do you mean Sammy isn’t talking to her parents 

Their reunion is soooo cute 

Sammy you are a queen and I love you.

FUCK YOU CARL

I forgot we were in Texas lmao

OH MY FUCKING GOD IT’S SAMMY SEEING BROOKLYNN FOR ME 😭 now it’s definitely for sure that Sammy died her hair in honor of B. Brooklynn’s jacket 😭

SAMMY 😭😭😭 “or Yaz pulling away from me”

FUCK OH MY GOD CARLS DEAD

Got me ugly crying 

Ep. 4

Darius’ humor is immaculate 

Everybody’s calling Ben by his full name and I love it

WHAT? GIRLFRIEND??

Nooo the brothers are fighting

Kenji has… downgraded

Oop- no the money loss

Sammy that kick was awesome marry me plz wait no u have Yaz marry her and then marry me

I knew they were fighting but god damn he rlly just shut the door or Darius like that

Kenji I love you dude but take this seriously 

Ooh the tension

Ouch, brooklynns death

Double ouch, Kenji blames Darius. Of course 

OH MY GOD HE’S OUT OF PRISON

“Once you lose my trust, you lose it. Forever.” Damn. Hang on let me go check off Kenji and his daddy issues off my bingo card rq

The girlies aren’t in a good place 😭😭 “why did she say something?” Plssss

I love how Sammy car jacked Ben by tickling him for his keys

Them abandoning Darius with Kenji 💀

I  love the rock climbing scene 

“where were you the night Brooklynn died?” Oop- we’re doing up this now?

OH!? oh

Awww fuckkkkkk 😭

That’s another mark on my card

YAY BROOKENJI IS OVER

but also damn… poor Kenji 

“Wait how do I get back down?” You’re so real Darius 

Aww bumpy noooo

Ep. 5

DANG THAT COMPY GOT SWEPT UP

“Hey that song kinda reminds me of that” *turns music off* oh

“Not taking family advice from a kid who hasn’t called his own mother in over a month.” OH. WERE YOU SILENT OR WERE YOU SILENCED. THE BOYS ARE TAKING SHOTS AT EACH OTHER 

YASAMMY

“Oh yeah, Darius warned me. LMFAO

Ohh she told you Benjamin. No more carob. 

The gyrosphereeeee

Oh fuck this guy whoever you are.

“Free the Dino’s.” YESSSSSSSS 

I had a feeling we’d see kenjis dad

“Did you have Brooklynn killed?” Oh going in hot ig

Oh shit- DAMN BEN AFTER ALL THIS TIME

OK, I feel bad for Sammy because even after all of these years, she makes one mistake by spying for mantah corp and people still kind of hold it over her head, even her best friends. that must suck 

Ooh the tension

“Don’t do the Japanese thing. You know I don’t speak it.” Ooh we’re bringing the culture too! JW ain’t playing 

Oh shit-

YOU DONT MANIPULATE MY SON ANYMORE OH SHITTTTTT

AHHH SAMMMYYYYYYYY

I love how Ben and Sammy take down a Dino abuser just as a little side quest

Aww they’re so cute  OH MY GOD WTF HE’S THE “WEVE GOT A PROBLEM DUDE”???

Poor kenji THATS RIGHT YOU STAND UP TO HIM KENJI FUCK YOU DANIEL

“Im not afraid to get my hands dirty” oh shit-

OH FUCK CAN THEY CAMOUFLAGE??

OHH SHIT

WHO TF IS THAT SHE LOOK LIKE A FUCKING DOLL I WANT MY MOM HELP

FUCK OH MY GOD FUCK WHAT THE HELL

POOR KENJI

THAT CANT BE A FUCKING REAL PERSON

WHO TF IS THAT IN THE CAR??

AWWWWWWWW FUCK KENJI IM SO SORRY

Ep.6

YAZ MY SWEET GIRLY HIIII AWW POOR GIRLY DAMN NOT EVEN A FULL MINUTE IN AND WERE ALREADY BRUNGING IN THE TRAUMA

she’s so pretty thoughhhh

Aww brooklynnn 

AWW THE BABY TALK

Aww the trauma poor baby I just wanna give her a hug

“Any particular reason I’m here and not Sammy?” Ooohh

Awwwww

Yaz I love you. You’re so pretty, and cool, and just a bunch of good things

OH MU GOD THAT PIC OF THEM IS SO CUTE

Are you gonna answer the phone Yaz?

YAYYYY SHE PICKED UP

MY GIRLIES I LOVE THEM

“Wait you’re coming here?” You can hear the panic in her voice.

IM SO GLAD TO SEE YOU YAZ

Yaz is definitely suspicious. 

AHHH THEY SAID THE L WORD

I love this episode already

It’s so amazing that they’re actually addressing their mental health. I don’t think I’ve ever heard children’s shows say the words  traumatizing and ptsd.

Oop. So this is where you live Yaz?

Awwwwww she’s waiting for them AWWWWWWWWWWWW (MORE LIKE A SHRILL SHRIEK) THEYRE REUNITED 

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH IM CRYING 

Awww I love Ben and Yazs friendship so much

Ooh time to drop the news

This place is so pretty and nice and Yaz genuinely seems to be happy. Also she knows people :)

“Benny Boy.” Aww

Sammy is not enjoying this place lmao

“You’re favorite.” Oop-

UH OH IM SCARED I DONT WANT TO SEE THEM FIGHT I THOUGHT I WAS READY BUT I DONT KNOW

WE GIT THE SCENE

BEN GET YIUR GOOFY ASS OFF THE GROUND

IM SCAREDDDDD 

Oh shit

AHHHHH 

OH FUCK FUCK I DONT WANT TO SEE THEM AGRUE DIDNT WE HAVE ENOUGH OF THAT IN CAMP CRETACEOUS 

I love that Sammy is trying to protect Yaz but she is taking it a little too far. Ben is me, I can’t see I’m blinddddd blinddddd blindddd

But also Yaz you didn’t keep in contact?? 

Oh shit Yaz has a point though *shrieking*

Not the fucking time Ben 

I take it back this isn’t my favorite episode I don’t love this episode

Ben struggling to give advice plssss. I love you dude

I love Yaz and Ben’s friendship so much though

“When me and my girlfriend—“ the swoop up, like right Yaz. “I’m sorry girlfriend?” Right. That’s what we’re all wondering

“Why does everyone act so surprised when I say that?” BECAUSE YOU’RE GAY??

OH FUCK OH FUCK PEOPLE ARE DYING OH FUCK RICH DIED

I DONT KNOW WHO HE IS BUT HE IS DEWD. EATEN. GONE OH SHIT POOR YAZ

aww poor Sammy I just thinks Yaz needs some great room. 

Sammy was definitely abt to say “how the hell”

WE GOT THE OTHER SCENE

The little side eye Ben gives Yaz after “big Ben’s got moves” <3<3

OH FUCK THEY ARE TRAPPEDOh dpw is here they got it

the little hand hold <3<3

OH FUCK THE DPW IS NOT THERE THEY DONT GOT IT THE DPW IS MAKING IT WORSE FUCK I HAD A FEELING 

OH FUCK THEYRE FAKLING IN THE WATER

OH MY GOD WTF

Ep. 7

Oh they are under under.

My worst fear lowkey

oh shit…

OH SHIT THEY ARE SO CUTE AWWWW

poor kenji… awww fuck this is so sad. 

Who is this guy??

Uh oh… the dpw

Kenji poor baby

WHAT ARE YALL JUST DOUING SITTING THERE???

Ben really? Ductape

That’s my strong girls 

Nah this shit is terrifying 

Oh thank god 

Oh shit we’re finding out what happened 

Aww a little girl 

Oop corruption… but for a good cause?

Oh shit

How tf did Brooklynn not feel those footsteps?

Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck.

Is Brooklynn actually dead? Moment of truth.

Awww no no no no 😭 Darius fuckkkkk 😢

I can’t believe they actually showed a pool if blood. Brooklynns pool of blood

Wait so they saw her dead body? So she’s actually dead? Or what?

Oh fuckkkkkklk 😖 

STOP 😭

AWWW YASAMMY IS SO FUCKING CUTW AWWWWv

Not the random Italian 😭

OOH FUCK NOT THE PASSWORD UH OH

STFU DUDE

Ben was WAITING to throw those phones

Yaz I love you. “I am so going to haunt them from beyond the grave.”

I KNEW THE ROOM WE SAW WAS BROOKLYNN’S PLACE

Her house is so cuteeee

Please Sammy your voicemail 😭 I love how we’re getting to hear everyone’s voicemail

Awww

Oooh the plot thickens

Oh shitttt BROOKLYNN WTF ARE U DOING?

A FEW MILLION?? PASS THAT ON OVER RIGHT OVER HERE

OH SHIT

Ep. 8

WTF ARE YALL DOING WHY ARE YOU DIRECTLY IN THE CAGE WITH THE DINO ARE YOU ACTUALLY INSANE ATP YOU’RE GIVING IT A FREE MEAL YAZ WTF ARE YOU DOING YALL ARE TESTING FATE RN

KENJI YOU CANT BE SCREAMING LIKE THAT ALSO WTF WAS THAT SCREAM but also I can’t judge that’s me when I see a spider 

Oh I forgot abt all of those voicemails Darius sent

Aw lowkey poor dinosaurs

Who is he?

Kenji you’re such a goofball. Eew no I take it back gagging barfing gross wtf 

No Brooklynn what’d we say abt the baby talk pls no

Yes, Darius I am sufficiently uncomfortable 

Uh oh the boys are tussling I’m getting flashbacks to Ben and Darius 

Awww dariusssss 😭

Camp fam try not to get recognized by strangers challenge quick, start

Damnnn Sammy that was smooth. 

Darius… why are you in that gross ass tub

Camp fam boys try not to be gross challenge 

WHATTT

HANDS TO MY MOUTH IM ACTUALLY SHOOK RN

WDYM “I WAS IN LOVE WITH BROOKLYNN”

I DIDNT THINK THERED BE DINOSTAR WTF

OMG

Please get out of the fucking tub

You don’t know what’s been done in there

Are we just abandoning all self respect we have 

HOLY SHIT

oh is it the video? The video of her death?

Bumpyyyy

Oh fuck… 

YAZ 😭😭😭 “boo.” Please I love youuu

Right, that’s my reaction lmao

Oop Brooklynns mad

Nah cause she stared at that dinosaur for 3 straight up seconds girl has your time on numblar taught you anything??

In my Abby Lee voice: “BROOKLYNN HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?!”

no wonder your ass got ate

I’m sorry that’s mean.

I love you girly

Oh fuck.

Girly is dead

😭😭😭

“You and me, we’re brothers right?” STOP YOURE BREAKING MY HEART 😭😭😭😭😭

Stoppppp

Will we ever find out why Darius wasn’t there??

Oop dinosaurs 

What’s wrong with bumpy??

AHHHH SHE SAID IT SHE SAID THE CHAOS LINE “maybe not”

“What are you looking at?” Pftttt

Uh oh. He’s dead…

Oh well

Oh now they’re really looking 

“Yeah I don’t like that at all.” Yeah but I loveeee you Sammy 

Ep. 9

Poor Sammy but girl you need to chill

Bumpy???

Awww. I love yasammy and seeing them work through the it issues. ASWWWWWWW

OOH the gangs all here

How tf did Darius and Kenji scale that fence

Oh shit,

Miss ma’am you are too pretty to be participating in nefarious acts like this 

Lmfao “okay we get it you’re a climber”

What did I tell you girl? Way too pretty to be doing this shit

Come on Kenji put those protein drinks to work

Yaz wearing a crop top 🥰

Awww bunny nooo fuck fuck

Awww Ben 💔

Oh fuck no I would not be climbing up there 

the gangs all here

Okay kenji 

Damn Sammy you stay trying to knock kenji out I love you ❤️ 

Also the part where Yaz is covering both their mouths? So badass

Awww reunion how sweet

PFTTT DARIUS 

BUMPY NOOOO 😭

Oh so when they said international they meant international 

Oh shit…fuck… Brooklynn :(

LMFAO BEN

Oh…Ben 

Bumpy…

OH SHIT BUMPY IS SHE HAVING…

OH WAIT SAMMY’S SO PRETTY

FUCK WAIT BUMPY

NOOOOOOOO WTF

OH WAIT WTF

SAMMMYYYY 

STOP FOOLING US

YALL R SO WROMG FOR THAT

LMFA “DON’T THINK ABT IT BUD” 

cmon did you rlly have to ruin the happy moment?

Ep. 10

HOLY SHIT LAST EPISODE 

Oh the plot THICKENS 

SAMMY I LOVE YOU

OKAY BIG BEN OH SHIT BIG BENS DOWN

SAMMY I FUCKING LOVE YOU

OH SHIT OH SHIT THE TENSION IS INCREASING

NOOONOT HER SHE SCARES ME

AHHH I WANNA GO HOME

SHE CANT BE FUCKING REAL 

oh shit…

WAIT so it was the atrociraptors that killed Brooklynn???

OH FUCK HOW IS THIS A KIDS SHOW

YOU KNOW WHERE WHAT!?!?

OH FUCK

OH FUCK IT SMELLS THEM

OH SHIT

OH FUCK?

what if it’s Ronnie?

Oh it’s Mateo okay. 

TORO??

Aww yasammy

DAMN THAT SHOT WAS COOL THE TREX AND THE EXPLOSION 

HE PUNCHED IT 

AHHHHHH YAZ SAMMY YASAMMY OH MY GOD “MY GIRL” OH MY FUCKING GODDDD

NOW THAT WAS A SHOT STRAIGHT FROM TEXAS

THE KICK!?.

OH MY GODDDD HES ABOUT TO DO THE THING 

HES DOING THE THING OH MY GOD THE PARALLELS 

HOLY SHIT THIS SCENE IS INCREDIBLE 

THAT FUCKING ROAR

Oh?? The Broker??

HAHAHA THATS WHAT YOU GET 

WHY IS THIS BITCH STILL ALIVE AND HERE?

OH FUCK BYE BITCH WITH THAT UGLY ASS HAIRCUT 

Lmfao not them shitting on kenjis camper

Are they going to Brooklynn’s apartment?? Abroad?? 

THE LOOKS OF SHOCK ON THEIR FSCES RIGHT BEN THAT WAS MY REACTION 

AWWW NOT THE UNREQUITED LOVE TROPE

AWW FUCK :( :(

YAY WERE GOING ON AN ABROAD JOURNEY 

JESUS FUCK MATTEO 

OH MY GODDDD WERE GOING ON A TRIP IN OUR FAVORITE CARGOSHIP 

RONNIEEEEEE HI DARLING

OH WAIT WTF RONNIE WHATE R U DOING DONT TELL ME…

wait…… is she texting…

Wait wait wait this could be either good or bad but I’m thinking good

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HOLY FUCKING SHIT I WAS RIGHT WE WERE RIGHT RUGHT 

OH MY FUCKING GOD OH MY GODDDDDDDD WE WERE RIGHT 

OH MY GOD SHES ALIVE AND SHE LOOKS SO BADASSS

[mytalemyworld]

Asi: You will always be by our side and never leave us alone. You won't do anything crazy, okay? Promise me. Yaman: I promise. But even if I left, Alaz would never leave you. Asi: What do you mean by that? Yaman: Nothing. The only thing I know Alaz is not like his former self anymore.

Yaman being a matchmaker between Asi and Alaz, meanwhile Alaz to Yaman: "forget Rüya, you have to seduce Leyla".

Alaz: Kiss it so it will heal. All right, obviously you won't do it.

His lip is bruised because of her but she isn't there to dress his wound. She is just sad to cause that. Alaz is aware of it too. That's why he gets his hopes up. He wants her to talk to him openly.

Alaz: Asi, why did you come here then? Asi: I was worried if you were well. Alaz: If you're well, I am well too. Asi: Thank you for being by my side today. Alaz: I am always by your side, Asi. Asi: I wish I could believe what you said. Alaz: Believe it. Asi: Tomorrow you will get back to your old self again. Alaz: I won't. Asi: You will get scared again. Alaz: I won't.

He's in sleeping attire which makes him look younger and looks at her innocently.

What a view!

Asi isn't scared of getting caught while going into his room. She really wants to believe him again. She expects from him to do something that makes her forget the heartbreaks he caused.

And Alaz now can scale her walls and tries to reach her inside. But there's not much he can do now. Only time can show his sincerity (which will be their worst trial.)

Alaz: Because my only fear is to lose you.

They look so lost in each other. She's defeated again. Just by one little kiss.

Alaz: Can I continue (kissing you)? Say I can. Please. Asi: You can…not. Alaz: Sorry. Are you smiling? Did I make you smile?

His begging, his smile, his voice. Her self-control must be appreciated. But I get her, if they continued it, they would never stop and would jump right into his bed.

And he makes her smile by showing how hungry he is for her.

They are not always like this, but they need this right now. They want to be vulnerable, open up to each other. And he misses her so much, literally begs her. I don't think I can write what I feel every time I hear "say i can, please". He. Is. Insane.

Asi: Good night. Alaz: Asi… You smile beautifully. Don't go. Sleep beside me, please. Let's just sleep.

He has won again. And if you think I will get used to this view you're wrong. He is her one and only pillow now.

Asi has never been with someone like this. Someone's holding her and not letting go even in her sleep. She’s getting used to being loved, so is he. They're just so beautiful and wonderful.

[throneofsapphics]

hello! absolutely love your writing, and i have a request. could you write a dorian havilliard x female reader one shot where the reader is a waitress who is nice and kind and always joking around and it’s after the war and dorian is learning to be happy again and it’s kind of a falling in love montage from dorians pov, please? i’m sorry for all the instructions, but i have this very detailed scenario in my head and i lack the writing skills to make it real. thank you!!

ps: sorry for the rant, and sorry if i accidentally sent a request twice!

tuesdays

Dorian x f!Reader

Summary: Dorian lives a second life, every tuesday. 

Warnings: nightmares, not proofread 

A/N: thank you for the request and don't be for the instructions! this was so cute. I hope I did your vision justice!

Dorian liked to shift, alter his features enough he was unrecognizable and spend time in his city. Time where nobody was gawking, where he could stroll the streets of rifthold, and feel almost normal. 

He found himself drawn to a particular cafe. It wasn’t fancy or formal, run by a family - he recognized the names as some of the rebels Chaol used to work with. 

Every tuesday, he’d make his way down there at noon. Right when he knew she would be working. It hadn’t started that way, originally he just enjoyed the tea and pastries. He still enjoyed them, of course, but her presence made everything sweeter. The laughter, the casual jokes, and utter comfort of knowing he’s being treated like a regular citizen of Rifthold. 

-

“Where do you go, every tuesday?” Chaol asked him. He knows his friend has wanted to, for weeks now. 

“Out,” Dorian replied mildly. Chaol raised an eyebrow but he wasn’t ready to share this part of his life yet. 

-

He watched her make her way over, laughing and balancing a star on one arm, asking a woman how her mother was faring. Another about her new baby, cooing at the small figure in her arms. 

“Back again?” She teased, approaching his table. He grinned at her. The same greeting, each time. He loved it. Dorian almost flinched at that word, echoing in his mind. 

“Of course,” he recovered smoothly, “I’d never miss the chance to try one of your mother’s new creations.” Every tuesday, they would roll out something new. A trial run, and if successful, it would reappear the next week. 

“I’d be sad if you did,” she smiled, a small laugh escaping her lips. He saw how her eyes lit up, shining with pure joy. No visible shadows haunting her. Were there any? He wanted to know. 

“Are you alright?” He blinked, refocusing his vision to see her worrying her bottom lip. “You spaced out for a bit there.” 

“Sorry,” he cleared his throat. “I’ll take your pick.” 

The slight worry left her eyes. “As expected,” she winked before making her way back across the room. 

-

Darkness enveloped him, pressing in on all sides as an unintelligible voice hissed at him. Then - a soft laugh and a hand. He held on, letting it tug him out of the darkness. 

Dorian shot up in his bed, his heart pounding out of his chest. He knew exactly who that laugh belonged to. 

-

Six weeks later, she slid into the booth across from him. His eyebrows rose in surprise. For the first time, he was late - nearly an hour, held up by some obnoxious courtiers. 

“I thought you weren’t coming,” she admitted, a sheepish smile on her face. 

“I’d never miss our date,” Dorian replied without thinking and watched as her cheeks reddened, knowing his were doing the same. 

“Well,” she glanced at the clock. “I’m off at noon tomorrow, if you’d like to take me on a real date.” 

“I’d love to,” he didn’t hesitate, and watched her pulse flutter. 

-

Dorian had never really taken someone on a date, he realized, with some horror. This was a bad idea for a thousand reasons - all of which he could and would dismiss. 

They strolled through the markets, he brought flowers from the castle gardens - those were interesting to sneak out, and ate fried fish by the docks. He watched how the sun glinted against her hair, the smooth curve of her neck, the blue shade of her tunic - a blue that would perfectly match his natural eyes. 

-

One date became the second, and then a third. She wrung her hands together anxiously. SHe never hid her emotions - never tried to, always wore her heart on her sleeve. Something he loved about her. Loved. That word kept popping up in his mind, over and over. 

“I figured out your little secret,” she cast him a sly smile. His stomach dropped, throat growing tight. 

“Pardon,” he choked. She sucked her lips inwards before pressing them in a tight line. 

“You can change your appearance somehow. Your eyes aren’t always the same shade of green. 

Relief and a smidgen of disappointment flooded through him. If she’d figured it out on her own, this might have been easier. Did that make him a coward? He’d think about it later. “I’m flattered you spend so much time studying my eyes,” he deflected. 

Her entire body seemed to flush. 

-

Dorian puzzled, for weeks, over how to tell her. How to tell the woman he was slowly falling … in love with who he really is. Preparing himself to accept whatever reaction there would be - anger, fear, rejection. He prepared for the worst. 

-

The darkness, the nightmares still came but there was always a soft laugh or a hand to lead him out. Always hers. 

-

They sat on a lush green hill, overlooking the city. A beautiful, serene, secluded space he scoped out in Raven form a few days before. 

It took him nearly half an hour to build up the courage, to tell and show her who he really is. Well, his true name and appearance. In veiled terms, he’d told her of his past, and she told him of hers. For all intents and purposes, he was more of himself with her than almost anyone else. 

She watched him, studying his true form for a few minutes before a mischievous glint crossed her eyes. “It’s about time.” 

“You knew?” He gaped. 

“I knew.” She confirmed. 

In that moment, Dorian decided he’d make her his Queen. 

[smileyerim]

i don’t care what we are it just has to work

“What you love the most will kill you”, the old proverb your mother used to say rings in your ear over and over again as you sit in front of your phone waiting for Chris to answer the FaceTime call. You’ll do anything to keep him close, even if it means destroying yourself.

inspired by: extremely personal events so please be nice :(Title comes from Understand by Hippo Campus

pairing: idol!chan x hannah’s roommate!reader

genre: angsty long distance situationship. some fluff

length: 2.9k

warnings: very very sad I’m sorry!!

net tags: @kflixnet @straykidsland

. . .

You’ve been looking forward to it all week.

Clearly, as you’re sitting on your bathroom counter, legs crossed underneath you as you skillfully twirl your hair around the curling iron in an attempt to look nice for him. It’s almost embarrassing how much effort you put into your calls with him.

“You talk to him more than I do at this point.” Hannah’s voice startles you, causing your finger to slip and make contact with the hot iron. You hiss a swear word and drop your hair and focus in on the red mark on the pad of your middle finger.

“Fuck, would it kill you to knock first to announce your presence?”

“Sorry you’re too busy fantasizing about my big brother to notice me.” She teases and a blush comes up your cheek. She wasn’t supposed to catch you like this, getting ready for your calls with him with too much effort.

“I wasn’t thinking about Chris.” You defend, unplugging the curling iron with a frown, deciding at the last minute that putting your hair in a claw clip is a better move. At least now that Hannah’s caught you primping when she knows that the only plans you have tonight are for a call with her brother. Her brother that you’re “just friends” with.

“Oh, suuure.” She draws out and turns to walk away from the bathroom, “whatever you say!”

You roll your eyes at her after her back is turned, still feeling bothered by your burnt finger.

She was right, though, you were thinking about him. You do that a lot lately. Running through the old memories of his silly pick up lines, fantasizing about telling him how you feel, imagining what your first time meeting him again will be like.

Yeah, you think of him a lot. Probably too much as your heart continues to lurch every time you think about a future that isn’t promised to you of you and him in love.

Still annoyed, you kick your bathroom door closed and lock it quickly before you begin on your makeup. Sure, you had abandoned your curls but you’ll be damned if you don’t put the slightest effort in after not speaking to him for almost 2 weeks.

He’s busy preparing for a tour that is, fortunately, making a stop in LA. Unfortunately, though, there’s not enough free time in his schedule for you to give your relationship the trial run you desperately want. It’s fine, though, you’re still just friends. Just friends who begin each morning with an “I miss you” text and flirt like tomorrow won’t come, but just friends nonetheless.

Your 5:55 PM alarm shocks you out of your daydream and you’re forced to scramble to apply your mascara, nearly smudging it on the bridge of your nose in your scurry but thankfully you avoid it.

It’s 5:58 and you’re emerging from the bathroom to a knowing look etched on Hannah’s face as she stares at you scurry to and from your room in prep for your FaceTime with her brother. She’s not an idiot, she knows what’s going on here. She saw it all happen in front of her two eyes.

She’s seen her brother in love before, high school puppy love that is, but she’s never seen him like this. During their first world tour in the US, Hannah had invited all of her new roommates to join her in the fancy VIP stadium box Chris had organized (and paid for) for the whole group to watch the show. You hadn’t heard of Stray Kids or knew who she was when you posted the empty room ad on your school’s Facebook page, so you were truly surprised to love the show as much as you did. Before the end of the evening, you and Chris were side by side knocking shoulders as you laughed uncontrollably at the inside jokes you two had just created. All Hannah could do was giggle along to the story she knows she’s about to witness.

Still, despite the chemistry, he didn’t ask you out. You assumed it had something to do with his schedule, or the fact that you’re his baby sisters roommate, or that he simply wasn’t interested.

Hannah can hear the excited screams from you both behind your shut and locked door and it makes her smile a sad smile for you as she decides to turn in for the evening.

“You almost gave me a heart attack!” He exclaims through the phone.

“What, why?“ you giggle, finding his swollen face and bed head ridiculously cute. Once a week you take the evening off of work and studies and FaceTime Chris 10 minutes after he wakes up. He’s known to complain that it’s so unfair that you get the time to look so beautiful while he’s just waking up but secretly you prefer it this way.

“You look so stunning it made my heart stop!” He giggles out and you fake gasp, heart beating just a little faster at the flirty comment.

“Oh, shut up, you scared me.” You say, setting your phone down to prop it up on an old Gatorade bottle on your desk.

“Hello, Y/N.” He says finally with a grin on his face.

You giggle again, “Hey, Chris. Missed you.” His eyes shut and he lets out a big sigh.

“I can’t wait to see you again. I think about it a lot, actually.” He says, head leaned back on his pillow as he stares at his ceiling. He doesn’t want to look at you as he admits that.

“Me too,” You admit sheepishly as he looks back towards his phone screen, “I hope it lives up to all my expectations.”

It won’t, though, you won’t walk away with him being yours and you’re unfortunately sure of that.

“What expectations are those, hmm?” He teases and you suddenly feel very shy. Now is not the time to admit your painfully obvious feelings towards him so you chose to play it safe, the same way you have been since you began your “friendship” a year ago.

“Chris, that night that we met was one of the most fun nights of my life.” You look at him as he stares back with a small smile on his focused face.

“Me too.” He admits and that honestly shocks you. You’re a simple girl who leads a simple life. You don’t have many groundbreaking life experiences to your name, but Chris does. He’s the leader of one of the biggest kpop boy bands of all time, he’s collecting major life experiences like they’re Pokémon cards.

“Really?” You say, surprised and he looks at you like you’re stupid, as if you were supposed to just guess that about him.

“I’m so used to feeling like such a celebrity,” you scoff at him at that and he laughs. It’s a common occurrence for you to tease him for his status although it often makes you feel small, “that night where I got to be just Chris and have fun with a pretty girl I had great chemistry with was amazing.”

You full on blush at this point with no words to say. Chris is somewhat of a flirt, that’s no surprise. He’s always shooting off some cheesy compliment or pickup line he stole from his fans but it’s not often he says the compliments with so much sincerity. Says it like it’s just a simple fact, not something he’s seeking to get a response from you on. When he does speak in this way you’re usually left to scramble to try and change the topic to save your heart. You can handle his flirty comments because you can brush them off the same way you do when your girl friends speak to you that way, but comments like that make it difficult to do so.

You hum, looking down at your thumbs as they twiddle, an anxious habit you’ve formed long ago. “You look great right now, by the way.” You decide to tease his bed head. You secretly love it but you know it makes him shy.

“Shut up!” He bellows a full laugh, flattening down his curls with his hand. You laugh with him at how ineffective it was. You can’t complain, you love it.

“I’m sooo sorry that I’m sooo eager to get to talk to you that I forget to get all pretty.” He teases and you giggle again.

“Yeah, you should be. Hurts my eyes a little bit.” You squint and put your hand up to block the screen.

He laughs again, “fine, then, I’ll just hang up if it’s so torturous for you.” He feigns a threat, but it still makes your face flush at the idea.

“Wait! No!” You lean in and pout to the screen, “please don’t leave you look sooo handsome your hair is sooo perfect.” You match his tone from earlier.

He rolls his eyes at you at that, “well I know that but thank you for clarifying.” He smiles satisfied at your defeated face.

“How’s tour prep going? Any changes?” He knows exactly what you’re asking, but he chooses to ignore it. He, just like you, wishes desperately for more than 2 successive nights. He wants his days in LA to be spent with you too, but the reality is much bleaker than that. He has a total of 4 waking hours to give, half of that he’s determined to give to his sister as well.

“We added another song to the encore. So now the show is a total of three fucking hours long.” He doesn’t swear in front of you often so it takes you off guard, but you understand. It communicates exactly what it needed to.

“I’m sorry, I can’t imagine. That’s so much work in such a short period of time I don’t know how you do it.” You whisper, all you have to offer is empathy.

He smiles at your dejected appearance in fondness, “It’s okay, my favorite pretty girl coming makes it worth it. I’m glad to put on a long show for her to enjoy.” He smiles wider at your expression.

“Oh please, I’m not even paying to go, don’t you care about your fans and the hundreds of thousands of dollars they’re paying to make the three hour show possible?” You reject his compliment.

He was just kidding with you, of course he cares about his fans but he was attempting another flirt. He knows he shouldn’t do it so often, he worries a lot about leading you on. Until his contract in Korea is completed, he can’t have you, simple as that. Three more years until he has the freedom to decide for himself who he wants to love.

He doesn’t like to think about the fact that once those three years are complete, he will probably choose to stay in Seoul to continue the career he’s built. Far, far away from you still then.

“I’m sorry, I’ll stop.” He gives you a smile. Yeah, he really feels guilty for leading you on in such a way.

“Any other changes?” You look at him with a sparkle in your eyes.

“I have one hour per evening two hours after the post concert interviews.” He says, same spiel he’s given you since the tour was announced. He watches as your shoulders drop in sadness.

After a beat and a sigh, you look up at the screen “I’ll take what I can get!”

He smiles sadly at you, the image of his face getting frozen for a moment. Damn your spotty Wi-Fi.

“Here’s an idea for you then. What if I upgrade my hotel room to get 2 beds and you stay over with me?” You perk up at his idea.

“Really?”

He laughs softly and his eyes sparkle in affection for you, “Yes, really. I can’t stay up too late since I’ll have early schedules the following day but we can spend some short time together getting ready for bed.”

You smile big and wide at that but your ears finally catch on to what he said. He proposed to share a hotel room with you that has two beds. You get whiplash every time you speak to him, simply unable to read his signs. Does he like you or not? You feel silly every time you presume that he does, but you feel even dumber thinking that he doesn’t. The mixed signals hurt your head.

“Two beds?” You say in boldness, catching even yourself off guard. You weren’t planning on speaking your mind, but the words slipped from your lips faster than you could stop them.

He sighs sadly at that, “Y/N…”

Deciding to ditch the boldness after it’s escaped you, “Two beds are fine.” Is all you say with a fake smile. There are many times that the topic of your budding relationship comes up in little ways, but you’d rather avoid it. Again choosing to save yourself from the potential pain of opening a wound that doesn’t need to be.

No matter what you end up heartbroken. Either because he doesn’t want you, or because you’re far from him.

“Look, beautiful, I have to go,” You frown, but the butterflies erupt in your belly at his cute nickname.

“I’ll talk to my manager about the room switch.”

You smile sadly at the screen, yet still very excited to get to spend the time with him.

“Oh, and, I’m sorry about this but you know that tour starts next week.” He pauses to gauge the look on your face.

“I won’t be able to talk like this until I see you in person, okay?” He says and that nearly makes you want to cry. You haven’t gone longer than 2 weeks without your FaceTime calls since you met him a year ago. With LA being the last stop on their your, this means four weeks without speaking to him.

“I understand, Chris.” You smile at him again and his heart nearly leaps out of his chest. He’ll never understand what he did to deserve your compassion and understanding towards him. Where your doubt comes in the way of having the same security, he doesn’t share those insecurities. He knows exactly how you feel for him and what you want.

“Thank you for understanding.” He says softly.

“Thank you for trying.” You whisper back before he’s saying his goodbyes and the call ends.

It’s not long after you hear the hang up chime that the flood gates open and the tears fall. You’re supposed to feel elated after speaking with him, not discouraged and drained.

It dawns on you in this moment as you curl on the foot of your bed, freshly applied mascara stained tears cascading down your face, that you love him.

This is no longer a simple crush to write off as if it’s nothing, this is full on love. The greatest love of your life so far and you suspect probably ever.

As you think on the love you have for him, the tears fall harder and your sobs grow louder.

It’s in this moment as well that you realize with a heartbroken smile that you don’t care what happens at the end, as long as he’s in your life you’re content, or, at the very least, you will have to try to be.

You don’t want to live without him, you never want to go longer than 2 weeks without your calls again.

Unbeknownst to you, Hannah’s standing on the other side of your bedroom door listening in with tears in her own eyes listening to your sobs. Her heart is broken for you both.

As she lies her head against your door, she feels overwhelmed with guilt having been the person to initially introduce you both. Yet, at the same time, she doesn’t feel that way entirely. She knows that at the end of this long road is happiness for you both. There’s no way that the universe would set you two up in this way to end in disappointment, she can’t imagine it. So all she has to do is sit, and listen, and feel your heartbreak through the wall.

On the other side of the world six thousand miles away Chris lies in his bed, phone loosely gripped in his hand as he lies back, eyes shut tightly.

The guilt he feels for leading you on and allowing your relationship to progress in this direction is real to him, realer than it ever has been.

He’s seen you sad, disappointed, longing even, but he’s never seen you heartbroken. Today, though, in front of his own two eyes he witnessed the moment he broke your heart when he told you that you’d go so long without speaking again.

That alone nearly broke him. He’s not sure exactly what to do with these feelings but he knows he can’t keep doing this to you without action. Either telling you exactly how he feels or letting you move on and have the college experience he wishes for his little sister too.

At the thought of you moving on, though, Chris’ eyes begin to threaten to release their own tears. He loves you so much. He wants you to have all the happiness and love in the world. He’s known that for months, but the idea of you moving on to a man that isn’t him hurts his head and his heart. If that’s what it takes though, he will try to accept.

Four weeks. There’s four more weeks until you two are reunited.

Fuck, where do you all go from here?

part 2: where we end is somewhere far, something hard to understand

[therantfairysblog]

Happy birthday Iguro san

✍️ notes : it so lateee for his birthday but I'm getting writer's block and I'm not good at writing sweet stuff. Sorryyy iguro san, happy birthday 🎈🎈🥳🎉

Humming, prettily under the tree, she took a look at a little bento box she prepared. Kanroji sit, under the tree, watching a group of children playing around. She chuckled.

She put out a little mirror, checking her hair she put in a bun, her pink kimono that she never wear yet, smiling a little, showing off her reddish lip.

"hmm, hmmm....🎶

......

Iguro walking carefully among the crowd, to be honest he dislike it. He was never get used of that many people.

Kanroji send her letter to met him today, but she never tell why and she looked excited too.

He arrive at their promised place. Kanroji was there sitting prettily with her new kimono. He stunned. She's always beautiful but that day, she looked like an angel.

"Iguro sann, you come," Kanroji waving her hand. Her smile is so mesmerizing.

"hi Kanroji,....you look fine today"

"hehe thank you. Iguro san too. Come here, i prepared something for you,"

.....

"happy birthday, iguro san. " kanroji put out her bento box, a basket full of sweet and cakes she made herself.

Iguro feels his cheeks reddening. Kanroji prepared a lot and she's absolutely stunning today.

The day was clear with fall wind caressing their face. Iguro watch the love of his life eating with a faint smile behind his mask.

"thank you Kanroji, you prepared a lot," despite his small appetite and his developed hatred towards food, watching kanroji eating, for some reason make him hungry. There's some foreign cooking that he never taste too but rather than afraid of it, he feel curious.

"iguro-san, i made this strawberry cakes by myself. It takes a lot of trial but thanks God, it's come out quite good at last. I hope you like it," Iguro startled when Kanroji hand out a piece of pink strawberry cakes to him, attempting to feed him. He hesitant for a while, it's remind him of his family, suddenly his chest feel heavy, sweating.

"are you okay, iguro san, I'm sorry, are you okay?" Kanroji's voice startled him again.

"yes...yes I'm okay," he slowly open up his bandage, although he still quite afraid of Kanroji's view on his ugliness. As pure as she is, she never complain or questioned his face, which he relief of it but feel sorry for. The cake taste so heavenly as sweet as her. Iguro smiling put her worry away for a bit. He doesn't want Kanroji to feel bad or worry about him.

"iguro san, i wish you happiness, have a long live, i hope we can remain together for a long time," her smile mesmerized him.

'if only, we could meet in difference circumstances, and I'm not an iguro, perhaps'.

"of course, thank you so much Kanroji"

.......

"I don't even remember my birthday, nor today is my exact birthday to be honest," iguro started their talk while walking along the riverside.

"oh...err I'm not stalking you or anything....i wonder iguro san birthday, so i just asking from rengoku san....i mean he told me you live with them for a while....so...hmm, please don't feel weird about me..." kanroji reddening face with her bit panicking gesture chuckled him.

'oh my, Kanroji san please calm down," he laughed.

" it's not that, the way you care about my birthday, is a precious gift alone for me. This day, is just the day kyujuro choose for my birthday, it's the day i was saved. It's not really my birthday,"

There's sadness in his voice. Kanroji stopping her walk, her hand naturally touching his haori.

"Iguro san, the day you born, the day you saved, the day we meet. I wish Iguro san never feel burden, i want iguro san to feel happy every day, today, tomorrow too. At the very least, i wish Iguro san could feel a warm happiness when you with me like this. " her face turned red.

It's not a confession but why his heart beating so hard. Kanroji stood in front of him, with her holding his hand.

"Kanroji san...if you allow it. Can i.."

She just nodding her head. Slowly Iguro pulling her into his arms, hugging her as tightly as he could. Mitsuri hugging him back, tightly.

"I'm so happy, kanroji san. I'm so happy, thank you," he let his tears fall slowly in his cheeks. Kaburamaru moving slowly, as if hugging them both.

That day is perhaps the best day and the happiest day he ever feel in his 21 years of life.

"Happy birthday Iguro san"

[theravencawsatmidnight]

Part Five . Ending

W! Violence

Summary: reader has been trying to escape the trials since she arrived. One night she stumbles along a house that is out of the way . It is occupied by Leland Coyle and he makes a deal with her: keep his house clean with dinner every night and you can stay here.

The ending to my little story. If you read along i hope you enjoyed ♥️

In the morning Coyle woke up first like he always did to see you asleep cuddled up with him, dammit this leaving everyday is pissing him off, leaving you all alone like this.. And last night.. Finally he knew why you had a sudden mood change. You wanted to leave, even if you said you did not want to , he knew you did. You missed the sun, the fresh air… the clouds. The man groaned as he got up and out of the old bed feeling heavy and not up for the day, hopefully it would be over soon so he could get back to you.. Just to do it all again tomorrow.

A bit later you wake up to an empty house, a dark fake sky, and the smell of death lingering all around you. Another day in this place, the never ending trial. Slowly you get up rudding an eye wondering how Coyle is doing, you just wanted him here everyday with you to keep you safe, watch movies with him and ask him to help you sew. With a sigh you dragged yourself downstairs skipping breakfast but still filled out the note asking for basic supplies and pulling in the basket from the previous note, you spent the day sewing some placemats for the table when a knock at the door scared you right to your bones.

Should you?! Who could it be? Why would someone be here?! You were scared, Coyle was not here. “Regent 47? Its Easterman i'd like to talk !” yelled the voice on the other side of the door. “Uhm..” your heart was beating in your chest now ringing in your ears making it hard to think. With caution you got up from the table to go open the door slowly to see Easterman and two large men behind him. He smiled waving and you just stared at this nicely dressed man. “There you are! We were worried about you, thought you were dead! “ beamed the man “ quite the little home you have here, “ You just started, unable to say anything at all. What could he possibly want? “Uhm..” the man held his hand up stopping you. “No need for an explanation, ive been observing you these past few days, are you alright? You have looked so sad lately” your eyes grew big . of course he had been watching .. cameras were everywhere…”y-yes… i .. just miss the sun i guess… Easterman i ..” he placed his hand on the door scarring you. “I'm sure you do Regent. Thats why im here, i have a proposition for you: come live with me, outside these trials, a nice big clean house, all the yard you could want to sit in the sun, you could be my little housekeeper instead of that damn Primes” a .. a way out but.. “What about Coyle? What will he do?” you asked him , trying to push the door back onto Easterman to close it but his grip was too firm. “He will be all alone again ….” the look on Eastermans face changed from happy to a little angry, his brow furrowed and he looked to be grinding his teeth a bit. “Hes a Prime , they dont have feelings Regent 47, who cares? Come live with me. I promise the nights with me will be so much better than that night with that damn cop” you stepped back letting go of the door allowing Easterman and his men to let themselves into the little house you made into a home. “You.. you saw…” you were speechless right now.. Why..how.. “Saw you riding his dick like you loved it? Many times.. Fucking slut im not asking again.” “please..get out.. Im going to ask you to leave.. “ Eastermans men grabbed you, bringing you to him, knocking over the little table in the process. “Oh Regent, this house was never yours, its mine. Everything in here is .. mine. And i'm going to make sure you understand that.” before you could say anything you were knocked out and taken out of the house.

Meanwhile, Coyles day was anything but exciting, he wanted to be with you dammit. On the way home Coyle was thinking of something, anything he could do to make you happy, maybe he could try to make dinner? Clean something? The man puffed heavily into his smoke feeling more and more irritated. “Hm? Whys the door open?” Coyle asked as the house got closer into view. He rushed up the steps looking all around. “Sweetness? “ he asked, going in to see the table flipped over and the sewing machine stabbing a needle into the table over and over. “Not like her to leave this on.” he was growing uneasy and worried. Coyle made his way back to the table flipping it back over seeing everything on the ground spread out. His head shot back up to the open door when he realized. “Sweetness…. Oh fuck.”

You woke up to a bright light shining on you and a headache. The room you were in was not the house.. It looked like a circus with mannequins everywhere. You tried to get up but the chain around your neck was making it difficult. The chain was attached to the floor and your hands were zip tied. “Look whos awake!!” yelled an excited voice. The man came into view and you shrunk into the dirty wall screaming for your life. It was Barbi , how?! Why?! “So ya think ya can just say no to the boss eh?” he stomped over kicking you in the stomach onto your back so he could stand over you . “lucky for me he said I could do whatever I wanted to ya! I hope ya like my friend here, “ he waved his shotgun around . “cuz its going inside ya!” he laughed as he continued to beat on you while laughing. Coyle was checking everywhere he could around the trials for you, you had to be somewhere, where were you?! He was growing panicked and not thinking clearly, Gooseberry found Coyle yelling and swearing up the black walls and rushed over to shake him. “Coyle! Easy! Ya lookin for your girl right?” the man turned to the woman pulling his sunglasses off “where.. Where is she Gooseberry” the woman pouted as she pointed to the tall building on their right. “Shes in there Coyle, but I cannot go with you” she told him, a little sad. Coyle took off for the building busting the door open to see a long hallway, your screams filled his ears making him shake in his boots. “Sweetness” he ran all the way down the hallway to see Barbi pulling at your pants trying to get them off you , he shoved the man off you taking his electric prod out to defend you. Your eyes were half swollen but you knew it was Coyle, the man shocked Barbi and brought his attention back to you to see you being lifted up by the Skinnerman so he could spray psychosis into your face. He ran away soon after and you started screaming as loud as you could, feeling its effect take over. Barbi was getting up and Coyle needed to find a way to free you , just as the man was about to grab Coyle a stun was sent his way hitting his back stopping the man in his tracks. Joy and Mika your friends ran over pushing Barbi out of the area, Joy kneeled down by you ignoring Coyle to slip you some antidote while Mika used a Rig Recharger for his stun. “We are friends of hers, listen she wants to get out of here. We are too far gone but shes not, “ Mika said, helping Joy up after she had freed you. Coyle quickly grabbed hold of you pulling you over his shoulder. “Where the fuck am i suppose to go” Coyle asked the two regents, you were a shaking heaving mess right now, bleeding, battered, bruised. “The way you came in, we have been doing some snooping, follow the twisted trees there's a gate, take the car outside, we rigged it, should work” Joy told the man as she pulled her stun out as well. “Please go, “ Mika said looking at Coyle, “we will be fine” Coyle handed the man his electric prod and held onto you with both hands as he rushed out of the room leaving the two regents alone with the Primes.

The car was right where they said it was and it was already on, quickly Coyle got in setting you in the passenger side , he sped off leaving the trials behind as he followed the trees, trying his best to doge garbage and what not, a gate was coming into view now. “Sweetness hold onto me” he told you. You felt all around whimpering, everything hurt, you could half see and wanted everything to just end. Your hands locked around Coyles arm as he drove through the gate hitting some security guards and broke through a double door. Both of you gasped and you had closed your eyes when it happened. The car evened out and Coyle slowly went down to a steady speed. “Sweetness… sweetness look..” Coyle said , shaking his arm around. You peaked feeling a harsh ray in your eye. “Ah.. ugn..” lifting your hand you realized it was the sun, the sky was visible… the clouds.. The air in your face.. The fresh air. You were out… you made it… you both did. Coyle placed his hand on your lap while he drove, taking one final look in the rearview mirror.

*******************

Little drabble to close out the story

*you and Coyle had settled into a tiny house a few states over. As soon as Coyle figured out where he was he decided to get great distance between him and the trials.

*a few days you were living in the car or sneaking into Hotels. Coyle had to bandage you up and keep you calm and quiet. The psychosis was gone but you were still very jittery and scared of everything around you.

*he requested help from the state and was given special treatment for his time in the service and how broken you were. You were unable to work because of the trauma .

*Coyle built the house ok the country side away from everyone and everything. No neighbors, no city, just acres of land the state owned .

*he set the house up just like the one in the trials for you so you would feel a sense of familiarity. He also set up a fence around the house

*you had gotten better but still were very anxious at times, always checking around your home. Leaving little night lights on at night and following Coyle around if you felt extra scared

* every morning, evening, and before you went to bed Coyle would check the perimeter outside the house. Every single day. He never found anything or anyone but that did not stop him from checking .

*Every monday the state would drop off supplies at the door from the mail. All you had to do was fill out the flyers they gave you and send em out every friday in the mailbox. It brought a sense of calmness to you , and it reminded you of the trial house

*the backyard was full of flowers, vegetable gardens and a little pond that ducks liked to swim in. You loved sitting outside during the day just staring at the yard and the sky

*Everynight after Coyle was done checking things you would both snuggle in the bed watching a tape .

[theadventurek9]

Long rollercoaster of emotions post below.

I think this is it for AKC obedience at this trial.

NQ in utility, first exercise was directed jumping.

She actually got a straight go out for the first send. Which was a win. I was so excited Then anticipated the jump when the judge said 'bar' almost took off. I paused to prove she didn't break her sit, rose my hand up and told her jump...and she took the wrong jump.

I felt so crushed. We get the go out for her to still just fail the exercise. Because of how crushed I felt I reacted poorly, told her no and set her back up again for the second one.

Because I told her no, I undid the success of the go out. She doubted herself and ended up not doing her second go out. She ran to the jump, she just went over. So I opted for the FnG.

She got the go out and the correct jump this time. So I left the ring, frustrated and sad. Aayla could tell.

Ended up in the practice ring to just play and do some very positive go outs and jumps, giving her easy sends and very clear cues. Brought her happiness up, but the damage is done.

I think I feel too stressed and unhappy about utility. I'm letting it affect me in the ring and how I interact with Aayla. Which isn't fair for her, she is doing her best.

I think I need to recognize we are out of time and it's time for her to retire from obedience in AKC and then from ASCA after finals. She hasn't Qed in AKC utility in a long time.

Why can't I just be unconcerned and just enjoy the game? Why can't I sit here and let the errors go? I keep feeling like I'm failing, that if Aayla just had a better trainer she could get this. That she could enjoy this even more. She loves working and once she is dialed in she is good. She is so solid for Open now. She has a 90% Q rate for open. I'm just not good enough to help her get there for utility.

She seems more sound and is moving better this trial. I think the adequan has helped and she seems more happy for obedience in general even if she is struggling with directed jumping. Which was one of the things I wanted to test at this trial, her desire and physical ability to keep competing. Which does seem like it's a green light on that front.

Maybe she could compete for another year but I need to seriously sit down and ask myself if I can handle another year. Now I'm the one with issues. Even as I'm writing this I've had time to cry and walk around and hug Aayla.

Aayla did get a solid go out the first time. She got excited to jump and took the wrong one. Not a big deal. She was EXCITED to jump. I shouldn't be upset about that. She wants to do it. If I had let the wrong jump go she probably would have gotten her second go out and probably had a nice run otherwise. For her the jump issue is an easy fix, she rarely gets that wrong and it's typically because I don't practice the directed jumping portion of the exercise. If I practice she won't mess that up.

Overall it's nothing big. Yet my reaction was big. That's a problem. A big problem. If I was to trial Aayla for another year I need to stop that. Take what happens with a grain of salt. But no more Q goals, just having fun with my favorite girl, my heart dog and enjoying our bind together.

Honestly I need that opinion for Aayla, Ryker and any future dog I have. I want my dogs to be accomplished but getting upset isn't going to get them there. Taking this silly game too seriously isn't going to get them there.

We have one more day and we are just going to go out to have a good time tomorrow and nothing else. I'll keep telling myself she can do no wrong and act accordingly. If it's her last time in the AKC obedience ring, so be it. We will make it a happy one

I have a lot to think through and a lot of self reflection to go over. I'll probably post a lot about it, so feel free to ignore.

[1moremilgram-enjoyer]

Amane T1 Cover - Positive Parade

Been a while, but we're back to covers! Time for the specialest girl ever, Amane and Positive Parade! I miss her sounding as happy as she does in this song, man. At least she seemed to be having fun in parts of Purge March too, but that was a different kinda fun. Anyways, let's go!

CW Cults and indoctrination, child abuse

Positive Parade is possibly the one covered song in Trial 1 with no explicit references to romance or sex, which in my eyes is a win for Amane, common best character w.

What also makes this song stand out is just how happy it is! It actually is an extremely optimistic and uplifting song, where the singer encourages someone else to follow their dreams and remain positive in the face of adversity.

Stuff your heart full with all your dearest dreams Go for broke on all the things you wanna do! “We can’t stop” Is this a good feeling? Or is it no good after all? On these never-ending nights, let's talk while dancing with the stars Even when times are tough, the light is always by our sides “We can’t stop” You’ll turn out okay! Because you'll find your smile fits you perfectly

(I'm using this translation because the translation in the Milgram wiki has very odd wording at times, so I think it kinda confuses the meaning a bit)

The 'never-ending nights' I believe represent the struggles of life, which at times feel endless. But the singer suggest to talk while 'dancing with the stars', while engaging with the light in the darkness. "Even when times are tough, the light [of the stars] is always by our sides." Optimism! Happiness!

There is the "is this a good feeling? or is it no good after all?" line which seems like it could imply some lurking horror, but there's a few ways to read that. I actually think the singer is asking if the person being sung to is happy with what they're doing, or if they should stop and move on to something else, which is similar to this line:

This isn’t enough, not yet I need to make sure I don’t mess up the words I want to say “I forbid you from pushing yourself too hard" "I’ll be right here” So you won't be discouraged by what comes tomorrow, if we could laugh together again... That's why you gotta stop those "what'll happen if"s!

The singer wants the other to make sure not to push themselves too hard, and reassures them they can rely on the singer.

The important part there is that the singer wants to be relied on. Not in like a dangerous way necessarily, just a "I'm your friend and I want to help you when you're down" kinda way. At least that's the vibe I get.

Heeeey, aren't you straight up bawling your eyes out? It's not normal for you to pretend that everything's fine. Even though you've got things you want to say Where's that sadness you've been shouldering? Come on, one day it'll just overflow "I'm sorry, I can't do it anymore, please help me" You don't want to imagine it, You don't want to hear it, do you? So before it comes to that, rely on me!

You know, I've seen people say that some people think this song is about toxic positivity, but to me it doesn't really look like it. The singer's literally telling the other that if they hide their pain, it's gonna overflow and that's bad. That's, like, the opposite of toxic positivity. And "you" don't want to hear yourself saying "I can't do it anymore, please help me", right? Just rely on the singer now before it gets too bad!

I guess you could say that sounds like a savior complex, which is definitely a way to read the song:

If someone tells you you're wrong, Even when you're not wrong at all I won't support anything that denies you You can take the opportunity to hold me close and you can share the burden of your worries with me You say it's embarrasing, but I'm embarrased too, you know! Don't laugh and say this isn't like me, It's my answer to meeting you. Rely on me, rely on me, please

Yeah, the "rely on me, rely on me, please" certainly feels a bit too desperate.

However, I still feel it can be read more charitably. Listen, this song was written as a theme song for a collaboration with a theme park named Yomiuri Land (Source, it's in Japanese but Google translate gives you the idea). There doesn't need to be a hidden horror here. While again, it's perfectly fine if you read it as a savior complex or something else, I personally see it as completely innocent positivity.

The line about both of them being embarrased by what's going on is very sweet. No big meaning there, I just like it.

So the singer either does or doesn't have a savior complex; at least they find quite a bit of happiness in helping others. If you're wondering about Miku shedding a tear in the artwork, it's probably a tear of joy from "dancing with the stars." In my personal opinion, there is no hidden horror in this song, it's just a really nice optimism anthem! The only way this would be horrifying at all is if it were being sung by, like, an abused cult victim or something.

... Oh.

Yeah this is where we acknowledge that, even though the original song may not be hiding anything too horrifying, it's being covered by Amane fucking Momose. And nothing this girl does ever fails to make us sad.

So, Amane here has the same "I want to make other people happy" attitude that we see in Magic.

[Magic] Only if, only if, only if I could be a good girl I hope, I hope everyone can be happy and smile Forever, forever together would be a dream

She's even called something akin to "Happiness Support Sister" in the credits. Amane wants everyone to be happy, that's ultimately her goal in everything she does. The thing is that the concept of "happiness" has been so horrendously twisted by her cult that a lot of the time it shows in a very... uh... concerning way.

Timeline 23/01/17 Amane: Happy birthday.Mahiru-san. How is your body feeling? Mahiru: ……ah, Amane-chan. Thank you. Yeah, I’m fine. Now I can move around if I use a wheelchair…… It’s all thanks to Shidou-san looking after me…… Amane: I’ll give you one warning. The two of you are dabbling in something tabooed. If you continue to go against the way of nature like this, you’ll just bring an early death upon yourself. Think hard about this. Mahiru: Amane-chan……? Are you really Amane-chan……?

Like, technically speaking, Amane is trying to make sure Mahiru stays happy. As in, not dead. She does something similar with Fuuta. Notably, she's only shown herself really hostile towards Shidou, who she dislikes for reasons even beyond the whole medicine thing. Long story.

But since this is Trial 1, she's likely not really speaking to anyone in the prison. So, who is Amane talking to? The most straightforward answer is that she's talking to her abusers, more specifically her mother probably. Because they are the "everyone" she's talking about in Magic; Amane thinks that if she can make them happy, she'll stop being punished and thus she'll be happy too.

Of course, this paints the entire song in a horribly grim light. Because now the singer's pleas to be relied on are Amane asking her abusers what she needs to do to make them happy.

You can take the opportunity to hold me close and you can share the burden of your worries with me You say it's embarrasing, but I'm embarrased too, you know!

The "burden" here may very well be the things Amane does """wrong""", so Amane might be asking what she needs to change.

Heeeey, aren't you straight up bawling your eyes out? It's not normal for you to pretend that everything's fine. Even though you've got things you want to say Where's that sadness you've been shouldering? Come on, one day it'll just overflow "I'm sorry, I can't do it anymore, please help me" You don't want to imagine it, You don't want to hear it, do you? So before it comes to that, rely on me!

Question: What do you think happens when "it overflows"? When Amane's abusers are frustrated at something? Not Amane, just anything in general. How do you think that goes? In a lot of cases, chid abusers will find any excuse to """justify""" hurting their child when they're frustrated by literally anything. That means it's very possible Amane now tries to make sure her abusers are happy all the time, because it's the only way she can think of to avoid being hurt.

This isn’t enough, not yet I need to make sure I don’t mess up the words I want to say “I forbid you from pushing yourself too hard" "I’ll be right here” So you won't be discouraged by what comes tomorrow, if we could laugh together again... That's why you gotta stop those "what'll happen if"s!

"I need to make sure I don't mess up the words I want to say" sure reads a lot more sinisterly when "messing up the words" could end up with Amane being seriously hurt.

Yeah like that.

If someone tells you you're wrong, Even when you're not wrong at all I won't support anything that denies you

And this definitely reads like something she'd say about the cult. She won't support anything that denies the cult or their doctrines, you don't have to worry about that! Please don't hurt her.

Stuff your heart full with all your dearest dreams Go for broke on all the things you wanna do! “We can’t stop” Is this a good feeling? Or is it no good after all? On these never-ending nights, let's talk while dancing with the stars Even when times are tough, the light is always by our sides “We can’t stop” You’ll turn out okay! Because you'll find your smile fits you perfectly

The chorus is a bit strange with this reading, since what the "dearest dreams" are is very debatable. It's possible it's just general positivity without referring to anything in particular, but if it is something specific, my best guess would be "following the cult's doctrines and going to [heaven or equivalent]". Apart from that, again, the other stuff is kinda sinister under this reading. "Yeah, focus on the good stuff! Don't worry about the sad things! Please don't get mad! Please please please don't get mad and hurt me!"

But the thing about "chasing the dream" being following the cult's beliefs makes the "we can't stop" line really mortifying. Originally that's just "we shouldn't let our doubts stop us in our dreams!" but now it's "we can't stop following the doctrines because horrible horribe things will happen if we do!"

[The Purge March] If you become a bad girl, monsters will come out This is the magic that stops that from happening

And wanna know a """fun""" little detail? I haven't been paying much attention to differences between the og songs and the covers, but Amane gets special treatment.

I invite you to listen to the "we can't stop" line from around 2:18 - 2:19 minutes into the song both in the original and in Amane's cover. In the Miku version, that's sung pretty much the same as every other time. However, in the Amane cover, it's sung in a noticeably different way. It's hard to describe, because it sounds a mix of exhausted, resigned, depressed, something like that. Think of it like this: if the rest of the song sounds like Amane is singing with her Trial 1 sprite, this one line is sung like her Trial 2 sprite. So:

Stuff your heart full with all your dearest dreams! Go for broke on all the things you wanna do! “We can’t stop” Is this a good feeling? Or is it no good after all?

Or translated for Amane:

"Follow your dreams of being a great follower and going to heaven!"

"Do all the things God tells you you should want to do!"

"We can't stop, can we? Even if it hurts, even if we are unhappy, we have to keep following that dream. Because horrible things will happen if we don't. And even if we try to change, then what was it all for? What did you hurt me for? There has to be a reason. Please tell me my suffering isn't meaningless. God will save us in the end if we keep doing this, right? That's the only thing I have left to hope for. We can't stop"

"Ehem- Doesn't it feel good?"

Or maybe I just like Amane angst a bit too much.

Anyways, that's the main takeaway from Positive Parade in my opinion. There is another way to read it, though, which I think is equally interesting. Mainly, that she might be singing it to herself, right before killing her mother. The "dreams" would be killing the mom, with the one more sinister "we can't stop" being there because it's a somewhat sinister dream. The "light in the dark" is a future without abuse I guess? The whole "rely on me" thing does come off as a bit weird, unless you go the "council of Amane" route and/or read it with the idea Amane has DID and then it just sounds like an alter, which would be something. "I won't support anything that denies you" and her mom did deny her... the issue there is that Amane also denies herself a lot of "vulgar" pleasures because Gozake ordainment. I don't think it works perfectly because of things like "I forbid you from pushing yourself too hard", but it's still a valid way to read the cover!

Anyways, hope you're not crying too hard! Take care!

[liminalpebble]

My dear friends,

I start my last semester at my job this week before my campus closes after Christmas. The days are numbered. I have 14 weeks. I love this space. I love the work I do. I love my students. This is going to be a very painful long goodbye, and the clock starts ticking tomorrow.

I'm trying so hard to stay positive and grateful that I've had this for some years now...and that I will still have it a bit longer. I'm trying to absolutely make the most of every ounce of it. I'm trying to keep my chin up, but...whew. I could just use a little extra love right now.

I've built this body of irl work over the years, mostly on my own, with trial and error and practice and study and blood, sweat, and tears. And I have 14 weeks to wrap all that up, try to take it with me, and build again.

I know nothing is wasted. I know it mattered. I know I will figure it out, and I know I'm being sad and whiny right now. But I think I just need to be allowed be not strong about it for a minute, in this little void, and admit that I'm heartbroken and change is hard.

And usually writing here is my joy. It's what saves me from how terrifying life is, but I'm even having trouble writing well at the moment. I worry that I'm disappointing those of you who read and are so kind and supportive of my work. I just don't know where to put all these thoughts and feels, so here they are.

Thanks for listening. You're lovely for listening, and read, and messaging, and just basically giving me hope in humanity as a whole by being lovely people. Thank you.

Peb

@muddyorbs @lokischambermaid @littlespaceyelf @loz-3 @jennyggggrrr @unlucky-number-13 @acidcasualties @ladyofthestayingpower @peaches1958 @gigglingtiggerv2 @goblingirlsarah @smolvenger @lemongingerart @tripleyeeet @holdmytesseract @thedistractedagglomeration @peacefulpianist @marcotheflychair @holymultiplefandomsbatman @itsfreakingbats @fanfic-collection @infinitystoner @unfocused81 @sailorholly @lokisgoodgirl @mochie85 @alexakeyloveloki @sweetsigyn

[sailor-aviator]

Farther Than Tomorrow

So, I know you guys come for my fanfic, but here's my original short story that I wrote when I was feeling some type of way about the cave paintings in France.

I remember every detail from the first time I did it. It had been an accident of course, but I had gone through the motions so many times now that it didn’t seem all that important how or even why it had started. Time travel had only recently become a possibility, and so some were assigned the task of observing historical events. To record every detail available to them without messing up the timeline, and reporting back to have their findings stored for posterity. Others had been given the task of actually changing certain aspects of historical events. The biggest one to date involved some event with a library, but I think it was still burned anyway, so the head honchos are still trying to figure that one out. I had been in the former group of employees when I first started out. That was, until I had accidentally been caught in the crossfires of the American Revolution.

I had hidden behind an overturned supply wagon, trying to catch my breath when I caught sight of a young boy. He couldn’t have been older than fourteen, and it looked like he still had some remnants of his baby fat on his face. He looked up at me, blue eyes starting to glaze over. He lifted his arm towards me, but it quickly fell back down to the ground with a soft thud. He tried to speak, but it came out as a harsh whisper, and a look of pure agony cracked across his face. His other arm grabbing his torso, and for the first time I noticed the brilliant scarlet coating his makeshift rebel uniform. He looked up at me, trying to speak again, but a sharp cry was all that came out as his body contorted in pain with the effort.

“Hey, now. Don’t speak. Everything is going to be alright now,” I cooed, crawling over to him quickly. I smoothed the hair out of his face, taking his hand in mine. Glancing down, I could see the dark stain growing bigger on his clothing.

“W-who are you?” he gasped, eyes raking over me. I wasn’t wearing any period clothing, so I could only imagine the sight I must have been to him.

“I’m from a time in the distant future. I’m here to observe,” I explained gently.

“I don’t want to die,” he cried, tears beginning to form. I could feel my heart wrench in my chest, and I carefully maneuvered him so that his head rested in my lap.

“I know, I know,” I soothed, stroking his hair. The small action seemed to calm him down, and he relaxed a little.

“If you are from the future,” he began, “then can you tell me if any of this is worth it? Does my death mean anything in the end?”

I paused, contemplating his words. He seemed to sense my apprehension because he spoke again. “Please. Tell me. I’m dying anyway. Please tell me that it’s not in vain.”

I took another moment to choose my words carefully, knowing I was breaking the biggest rule in the book.

“Because of your sacrifice,” I started, “something absolutely incredible happens. In two years time, the world turns upside down. The colonists win, and a new nation is born. A nation that will go through many trials and that won’t always come out on the right side of them. This nation will be known as the land of the free and the home of the brave. We become a great nation, one that rivals every other. We make mistakes, but this land and its people grow and become strong because of it.”

He stared at me in awe, his skin a sickly white at this point.

“We win?” he asked quietly. I nodded.

“We win,” I smiled.

“We win,” he breathed, a small smile creeping onto his face, and then, with a shuddering breath, he stopped moving. The world seemed to stop moving after that. I had never seen someone die before, and the sight left me in shock. I was put on leave with mandatory sessions with the department psychologist after that.

—

“How are you feeling after the entire experience, agent?” asked the doctor.

“I feel…sad. Like I should have done more,” I admitted quietly, staring down at my hands. The doctor nodded, giving me a sympathetic smile.

“That’s understandable. You weren’t supposed to witness any deaths on your assignment,” he noted, looking up from the file he had in his lap. I glanced over at him, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, not personally anyway,” he chuckled with a wry smile. “You were never supposed to be that close. I’ve heard they’ve fixed the coordinate machine though.”

“That’s great,” I hummed unenthusiastically. The doctor stared at me for a moment before leaning closer.

“There’s something else on your mind, isn’t there?” he asked.

“It was awful not being able to help that kid. But, in those last few moments, it felt…almost good to know I had comforted him in some way before he…” I stopped, not able to bring myself to say the word. The doctor nodded knowingly. There was another stretch of silence between the two of us before he spoke again.

“Maybe there’s something you can do.”

—

My director stared at me for a moment before letting out a long breath.

“And you’re sure you want to do this?” she asked, worry evident on her face. I gave her a hard nod, my mind made up.

“It’s something I feel needs to be done,” I said simply.

“Alright then,” she began, reaching down to grab a file. “This is your new assignment.”

—

From that moment on, I went from being a simple observer to being something so much more than that. I had made it my life’s work to travel across space and time to bring comfort to those on their deathbeds. I had visited everyone from simple Viking farmers to Napoleon Bonaparte himself. All to tell them how they changed the world into what we know it as today.

“I’m surprised at your work so far,” my director said.

“Is that good or bad surprise?” I asked with a smile. She returned it, and leaned back in her chair.

“Definitely good. Because of your work, we are able to put personalities to faces and people. It’s one thing to observe, but a whole different ball park to understand.”

“That’s very kind of you to say, Director, but I have a feeling you called me in here to do something else.”

“You’re right,” she said, handing me a thin file. Curious, I took it from her, flipping it open.

“What,” I began in confusion, “what is this?”

“It’s your next assignment, of course.”

“I don’t understand,” I said with a shake of my head. Closing the file, I attempted to hand it back to her, but she shook her head.

“This one is all yours,” she said.

“But…why? How can I possibly help? Can the Allspeak even translate for us?”

“Believe it or not,” she began, “a lot of observers requested this time period specifically. We’ve gained a lot of knowledge from the amount of people who volunteered to go.”

“Then why not have one of them go?” I grumbled.

“I think this will be good for you, and besides. You’re one of our best.”

—

And that’s how I ended up in a dark cave sometime in the Paleolithic era. The cave was empty, but not deserted. Several small fires were scattered about with stone tools and bits of food left around them. Not too far back, I heard a hacking cough echo to the front where I stood. Quietly and as quickly as possible, I made my way to where the man laid on his makeshift bed of pelts. Sweat drenched his forehead, and his breath came out in wheezes. He was dying.

At the sound of my footsteps, he opened his eyes, and they widened in shock at the sight of me. I put my hands up to show him I was unarmed, and he watched me wearily.

“It’s alright. I’m not here to hurt you,” I murmured, slowly continuing my way towards him. He continued to watch me, not moving. Finally, I reached him, and I slowly knelt down to sit beside him. We stared at each other for a long moment, both of us taking each other in.

“Who are you?” he asked.

“I’m no one important. Just an observer,” I replied with a small smile.

“You not from here,” he noted, giving me another once over. I chuckled, my smile growing with the action.

“That’s right. I’m from a far away place. A far away time.”

“Time?” he questioned, looking into my eyes. It shocked me to see someone completely human in them. For so long, we had been taught about the people of this time period. How they lived. How they survived. How they created masterpieces on the walls of the caves that still survive to this day. They seemed something other than human. But now, sitting there and staring into his eyes, it was like staring into the eyes of an old friend. Someone who wasn’t as otherworldly as first expected. Someone living from day to day. Just living.

“I’m from the future,” I told him. He furrowed his brow at me.

“What is…future?” he asked. Maybe they didn’t understand the concept of time beyond a certain point, or maybe they just didn’t have a word for future yet. I thought for a moment as to how to explain such a simple word to him.

“I’m from a place that’s farther than tomorrow,” I said finally. He seemed to understand that, and he nodded.

“What you doing here?” he asked before letting out another wheezing cough. I placed a hand on his chest, trying to give him some comfort.

“I’m here to see you.”

“Why?”

I paused, unsure of how to answer. The people of the Paleolithic era had always fascinated everyone throughout the ages. More specifically, their art had captured the imagination of everyone who had ever seen it.

“I want to know you,” I said finally. A different kind of confusion adorned his face now.

“I not family. I not important to you.”

“But you are,” I smiled, taking his hands in mine.

“How?” he wheezed, letting his eyes fall closed for a moment before looking at me again. I moved so that I was lying down next to him, and I pointed at the walls surrounding us. On every surface, a painting rested, holding a story that ran from wall to wall.

“See these?” I asked him, earning a nod. “These paintings will last longer than you and I will ever be able to understand. A long time from now, people like me will come here; long after everyone living here is gone. They’re going to come here, and they’re going to do everything they can to understand you and why you left these pictures here. People like me will cry at the sheer beauty of these pictures, and in doing so, will cry at the loss of you, at the loss of everything you represent. Their souls will mourn you and everything you’ve given to us.”

“Why they want to understand?”

“Because,” I whispered, “every single person that ever was or ever will be has come from you. By understanding you, it gives us hope that we can understand ourselves. That we can understand a time when we worked together to survive everything the world threw at us. We want to understand the time before we started tearing our world apart because we could.”

“And I give?” he asked, eyes turning to search mine, seemingly for answers to questions he didn’t even know how to ask. I nodded, feeling my heart break once again for someone who was already long dead.

“You give us the ability to understand the world around us and how we fit in a little better. You make us see ourselves for what we are.”

“What that?” he asked quietly, letting out a weak cough.

“Creatures that were able to overcome many trials and rise up to become something greater than what nature may have intended us to be.”

“That…good?” he whispered, fighting to keep his eyes open.

“Yes,” I said, “that’s very good.”

“I no want,” he coughed, his entire body jerking violently this time. “I no want to be alone. Family looking for food. No back for long time.”

“It’s okay,” I soothed. “I won’t leave your side.”

And I didn’t. For a long while, we laid there, staring at the walls. The fires around the cave danced, casting shadows that made those breathtaking pictures seem to move with them. We watched as the people hunted for the deer that seemed larger than life. We watched as the herds of bison raced against each other, forming waves of dark bodies against a sea of rigid stone. I didn’t realize at first when his hand fell limp in mine. When I did, I looked over to find he had completely stilled, departed to dance and hunt with his ancestors, and to be immortalized on the stone walls protecting us. Carefully, I arranged his hands so that they rested on his body, and I made my way towards the opening of the cave, sparing one last look at my new friend.

I didn’t go on any assignments after that. It seemed almost wrong to even entertain the idea of it. I retired myself to desk duty, handing out assignments when they came in, and making sure each person was assigned the cases they could handle. I still think about the man in the cave, and tell his story whenever I’m called to guest lectures.

“What inspired you to start this branch of the agency?” asked one student during a lecture at Harvard. I thought for a moment, not quite knowing the answer.

“I wanted to start it,” I began, “because I hoped that people in the future would look back on this and be inspired to continue to keep learning about themselves.”

“Where do you see our future being?” asked another student.

Smiling, I replied, “In a place farther than tomorrow.”