#my tags are messy ill tag later
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ghostinarotaryphone · 1 month ago
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New sketchbook. W.i.p for a page for one of my oc's.
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Caroline voorhees my beloved♡
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dontwanderoff · 1 year ago
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helen and dale are ONLY allowed to break up if they do whatever the newsreading equivalent of fleetwood mac's 1997 live performance of silver springs is btw
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mizzical · 4 months ago
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figuring out babygirl's colors and outfit and hair is hard
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brine-in-my-eyes · 11 months ago
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enby scott mccoolsvile fem presenting with long hair. who said that
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elegyofthemoon · 1 year ago
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day 2 and they are still very confused about what to do w me and i am also confused but at least i have a schedule.... i just need to wait for them to bring it back to me lmao
did have a very eventful morning and that was super cool except i spent it looking like >:O during the whole thing so
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oletus-manors-log · 2 years ago
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hello fellow idv writer, welcome to the shithole that is ashes of memory /lh
anyways in the title screen as well Alice is turning around [as China server accidentally leaked a 3rd image where she's facing the player]! We don't know what this means but, like orpheus, we're taking this as a symbol of her looking back, looking back into her past to embrace her future.
I'm also taking this as Ashes of Memory part 2 99% likely coming soon 👀
Ooh, hello fellow IDV writer! 👋 Also yeah haha Ashes of Memory has me in a chokehold rn.
And ohhh�� man I'm already excited for it coming soon! I just got back and if we have to wait for 3 years for the next lore drop? 😩 Hell no LMAO we don't need another episode of Orpheus lore not being dropped until years later LMAOOOO
Speaking of Alice, she's had my interest for a while and the way she's basically the grown up ver. of LG has me 👀✨ in potential lore (would also love to ask her on a platonic date like madame please tell me the shit you discovered, I'd love to know what you found out)
If we don't get to see more of her bond and the match she'll be on with the others, I'll throw hands WWWWW
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genderqueer-karma · 2 years ago
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manny post otd because i like thinking about him:
i feel like he has super illegible handwriting that's *technically* very neat. like it's all really fancy and flawless cursive, but most people, including those who can normally read the script, are like "bro what the hell does this shit say" or "what 18th century vampire's diary's ass did you pull this out of" or any variation on those
(not really part of it but tangentially related: based on his sprites he is left handed. not that i believe it plays a role in his messy handwriting or anything. i just think it's neat.)
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qwuilty · 10 months ago
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Im still working on stuff with setting this all up so i leave you: My s/i references because i finally sat down to make them
The first one is for CAD and the second one is for A&D, i imagine Cam would appear around 2008-2009 in the first and around the current time (2024 as of making this post) with the second.
(Please read my pinned before interacting!)
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jakesangel · 4 months ago
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lazy morning - 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒘𝒃𝒆𝒓𝒓𝒚 𝒌𝒊𝒔𝒔 event request
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preview : jake wanting nothing but to stay close to his love
word count + genre : pure fluff + 483 words / not proofread /
warning : kisses, hugs, sleepy n clingy jake, use of pet names
it's often jake finishes his dance practice late, coming over to your place when you're already asleep, happy to make you a morning surprise. but him finishing late also means he starts later than you, as work is calling for you really early.
but today is different that usual, the alarm didn't ring or you didn't hear it, making you late for work. and of course jake is all over you, his tight embrace and comforting smell, making it impossible for you to leave the bed. jake get off of me, you wisper yell, not even meaning it. he only makes grunts, rubs his face on your chest. come on jake, i'm late for work, he tightens his arms around your waist before humming, five more minutes please, he finally speaks. just two minutes then .
as you're making your breakfast, you suddenly feel a pair of naked arms h back hugging you and a chin coming close to your neck. mornin' baby, you hear his soft and low morning voice. the time seems to freeze, as he kisses your neck there or hms at the food breakfast your making. but you know once jake gets clingy it's hard to get out of his zone, jake not right now i'm late, you try to warn. it doesn't stop him. in fact it makes me clingier, his clingy puppy-ness coming out, as he wants something he can't have right now. he is also to tired to even think of the consequences of making you more late, but even if you lose your job, he'll be able to financially help you anyway. so he backs way a little, only to turn you around and hug you right there. jaaake you whine, without really wanting to leave him, you so warm and the bed is to empty and cold without you. he says as he smells your nape. he doesn't stop here, but hold you closer, stocking your hair softly. you know there is nothing you can do, but accept your beautiful fate. it also made you realize of his current attire : his grey sweatpants hanging low, showing off his hard abs and calvin klein boxer, his messy hair surrounding his precious bareface.
few minutes pass, and once his morning quota of his previous baby is finally fulfilled, he looks at you and kiss your forehead. lemme help you hm ? go put on your outside clothes, ill put your breakie in a tupperware, he sofly finish, a tired smile plastered on his face, alright ?
you're now in front of your front door, w a jake, still shirtless not really caring about nothing but you. there you go baby, he says as he hands you your food. he then put your hair right, so that you looks you arent 20 min late, and softly kisses you good bye, i cant wait to wake up in your arms tomorrow, my love.
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notes : there you go baby >< i hope you like it, let me know <3
⋆ ˚。⋆୨🍓୧⋆ ˚。⋆ tag list : @dreamiestay @jakesprincess1
perm tag list : @allurecile @luvj4key @stwrjvke @amouriu @neos127 @goldenretrieverjakezgirlbaby @jaeyunpinkyring @pockettwinzz @jwsdoll @heeheeswifey @sjylouvre @txnwvc @oopshee @luvlyhee @en-ner-jay @en-chantedtomeetyou @erenmyman @driedflowwr @hoonion
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ferigrieving · 4 months ago
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when hell freezes over.
⊹ ࣪ in which touya todoroki finds himself.
a.n sorry this took so long i rewrote it like ten times because it wasnt going where i wanted to and it still lowkey isnt but i think this is the best ill do and im too excited to get to the later chapters so i might just rewrite them all to be better when im done ! i dont know im just really passionate abt this fic i literally got a writing notebook just for it...
tag list ; @itgetzweird08 !
⤷ masterlist ; requests open ; two – 2006 ; four – 2010 ; 4.4k words
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touya todoroki was eight when his hair began to turn white.
his father had given up on him. said there was no point in training him. not when his quirk began eating away at his body everytime he used it.
every night, you would find more, and more burns. some more severe than the others, the skin peeling and rotting in ways you didn't know was possible. and every night, you’d place your cold, cold hands on him, and heal him as best as you could.
sometimes, you wanted to stop. your quirk made you feel like you had been plunged in an ice cold bath, hands holding you down as you struggled to breath. you could feel the ice creeping into your veins, threatening to freeze you from the inside out. but you kept on pushing. for touya. for the boy who couldn't give up, even if he wanted to.
“enji went to the doctor’s today.” touya spoke, leaning against the trunk of the big oak tree. “said i cant use my quirk anymore. ‘parently i have my mom’s body or… whatever.”
you could hear the anguish in his voice. his dream, no. his father’s dream was now a lost cause. all the hours, all the blood, the sweat, the tears, down the drain in an instant. all because he lost the genetics lottery. 
“what… what now?”
touya pushed away from the tree to look directly at you as he waited for his answer. the sun was beginning to set, casting an orange glow on both of you. you two never met in the daytime. afraid your parents would find out, that endeavour would find out. you were both on edge, and today’s news didn’t help at all.
“i dont know, toy’.” 
"you don’t know?” touya responded in disbelief. he was angry at the situation, and angry at himself. “of course you don’t know. you don’t know anything. do you even care?”
touya’s voice was harsh, cold. he didn’t mean to hurt you, he really didn’t. 
but when you’re an eight year old child who just had your dreams snapped away from you days after your birthday, it was a normal reaction. or as normal as one can be in a situation like this, anyway.
he began pacing, hands tugging at his hair with so much force you were afraid he would rip it from his scalp. touya’s hair had begun turning white in some places, and you didn't know whether it was from his mother, or from stress. you don't know which one you would have preferred.
you didn't know what to do. your parents never trained you on how to use your quirk at all. sometimes, selfishly, you wished you had a father like endeavour. a figure in your life that would help you hone your quirk the way enji did to touya. you could take it, the harsh words, and the unforgiving regime, if only it meant you could relieve the pain touya seemed to feel in every waking moment.
“i’m—” he mumbled, stopping to look at you.
touya looked like a mess. his skin was littered with burns and scars you couldn't heal all the way, his eyes bloodshot from tiredness and stress, hair messy and greasy.  his voice was soft, and if you really listened, you could hear him trembling.
“i didn’t mean that. i’m sorry.”
touya slowly walked over to your spot and sat down wordlessly. his shoulders slumped, and he brought his knees to his chest.  he didn’t say anything for a long time. the sound of cicadas surrounded the two of you, and the last of the sunlight faded away. the sky was dark, and a few stars had already begun to appear. the moon was half way dark, peeking out from behind the clouds in the night sky.
as touya rested, you slowly inched closer to him until your shoulder touched his. he didn’t flinch away, and instead slowly rested his head on your shoulder. 
after a few moments, he spoke softly, his voice barely above a whisper.
“what am i going to do?”
touya was a just a kid, but sometimes you forgot that. you forgot that he was just a child, not some grown adult that could handle the pressure of the world on their shoulders like endeavour had made him out to be.
“have fun.”
touya’s head moved from your shoulder to look at you. 
”have fun?” he responded in disbelief. “i can’t really have fun when my quirk— when my whole life is falling apart, can i now?”
"your whole life doesn't have to revolve around your quirk, touya."
“how is it not supposed to revolve around my quirk?”
touya sat up straighter, putting distance between the two of you. he looked at you with an incredulous look, like you had just suggested he run away with his tail between his legs.
“all i’ve ever done is train, train, and train. train and work my butt off for a quirk i never even really wanted. and now it’s all going down the drain like i’m nothing more than trash.”
touya sat back against the tree again, leaning his head back and looking up at the stars, emerging from their cocoon once more.
”this is all i’ve ever had. without my quirk, i’m nothing.”
he was bitter and resentful. at his father, for lighting this fire under him. at his mother, for giving birth to him. at himself, for not being enough.
to touya, the idea of suddenly stopping everything he knew seemed impossible. being the number one hero was the only thing on his mind since the day he was born. it was engraved into his brain, and all he knew to do. 
so now that he was stripped of that, where did that leave him? what was he supposed to do? who was he, if not the less than perfect successor for his father?
“what am i gonna to do now, huh? play outside? play with others? run around like a freakin’ kid?”
“yeah, actually.. you should play with me.”
“play with you?” touya responded sceptically, raising an eyebrow at you. “what are we supposed to do? have a tea party?
the idea of playing, especially in his current state of mind, seemed like a foreign concept. you two played sometimes, yes, but touya sometimes felt like he was going through the motions, if anything. he never really found anything in playing house with you, or pretending he was a villain and you, a monster. at least thats what he told himself, anyway. he’d rather keel over and die than admit he enjoyed spending time with you.
“if you wanna.”
touya looked dumbfounded. like you had just sprouted a second head. he knew you could be a little slow sometimes, but this was too much.
“seriously? we’re like… eight. we’re too old for that. we’re basically teenagers. ‘n’ you want to spend your time playing tea party? ” he said, making a face. “when we could be doing something actually fun, like skipping rocks or something? don't you have anything else in that head of yours?”
“...we could go to the park?”
“the park?” touya repeated, staring at you, a sarcastic lilt to his voice. “why do you wanna go to the park? so we can sit and spin around on the roundabout till we fall off?” 
“i mean.. no one's gonna be there. its late, so we’ll have it all to ourselves, touya.”
“that’s…” he began before stopping.  it actually sounded kind of cool. the idea of sneaking into an empty park at night with you. the idea of getting caught… excited him.
he let out a grumble, looking away. “fine. let’s go to the park.” he relented.
touya slowly got up from the ground and dusted off his pants before sticking his hands into the pockets of his hoodie.
“this better not be stupid,” he muttered as the two of you began making your way through the park.
it was late, meaning there was basically no one out except the occasional night-shift worker or the local drunkard. the only sounds to accompany you were the cars driving past, or the songs of the crickets. as the two of you walked, touya glanced over at you.
he noticed the way you walked confidently, almost with purpose. he would often catch himself stumbling as he walked, still not used to his gangly limbs. you, on the other hand, seemed to move so flawlessly. he was premature, and as a result, was shorter than fuyumi, and probably natsuo when he becomes of age. he was taller than you, sure, but that wasn't a feat by any means considering your height.
he kept his gaze on you for a few more seconds before looking away.
“hey,” he spoke suddenly, breaking the silence. “how come ya’ never play with other kids?”
it was a question that was bothering him for a while now. you never seemed to want to go hang around other kids, opting to stick by his side. touya could never really figure out why. maybe he didn't want to. he couldn't tell.
“why would i, touya,” you grinned, stretching out his name and slinging an arm around his shoulder, relishing in the way he recoiled. “when i have you?
a scoff.
“don’t say that,” he said in a deadpanned voice, but there was a light flush beginning to spread across his face.
he wasn't used to receiving praise from anyone, but when it came from you… it made him uncharacteristically embarrassed. touya didn't particularly know his emotions very well, especially not one that made him so flustered he wanted to throw up. not one that only ever seemed to show its face whenever he was around you.
“seriously, though. i’ve never seen you talk to anyone else like you do with me. how come?”
touya continued walking, casting an expectant glance in your direction. you didn't know what to say.
he had no idea why he wanted to know so badly. why the idea of you talking to other kids bothered him so much.  and he knew it was stupid. you were allowed to make other friends. hell, he was the one not letting you make friends with other people. but the thought of you talking to anyone else other than him sent a sharp pang to his chest.
he shook the thought away, forcing the feeling of possessiveness down.
after a few moments of silence, he spoke again, keeping his gaze straight ahead.
“...what makes me so special, anyway?”
“shut up, touya.”
touya let out a surprised huff of air at your response.
he stopped walking and spun around to face you so suddenly, that you nearly ran into him. there was a scowl on his face, and his eyes were narrowed.
“don’t tell me what to do,” he replied in a low tone, trying to sound intimidating the way his father seemed to be so effortlessly.
he wasn’t quite sure why. maybe it was the thought of you giving your attention to someone other him, or maybe he just wanted some sort of response from you. 
he leaned closer, using his barely-there advantage of height to loom over you. he watched your face, trying to figure out what was going through that dumb head of yours.
touya’s face inches closer to yours, close enough that you could feel his warm breath fan across your face. his eyes were locked onto yours, watching intently as you began to shift uncomfortably.
your hands began to feel a lot colder than usual as your fingertips began to turn white. the warmth in your veins was quickly replaced with a chill that you were all too familiar with.
your heart was beating quick and fast. you hadn’t realised how hard it had been beating until you felt your heart thump against your chest. you were sure touya could hear it, with how close he was. 
you could feel the heat rising to your cheeks as he leaned in even closer, his eyes still locked in onto yours. there was a determined look in his eyes, like he was trying to figure you out.
“whatever. i wanna go on the seesaw.”
touya’s expression soured at your nonchalant reaction. instead of the nervous stammering and stuttering he was hoping for, you had calmly responded, not giving him the slightest show that he had any sort of effect over you.
he watched as you looked away, avoiding his gaze. there was a faint redness to your cheeks, and a part of him felt satisfied at the sight of it. but there was also an undercurrent of annoyance at the idea of being dismissed like that.
he let out a scoff and backed away, putting some distance between the two of you.
“the seesaw?” touya repeated, raising an eyebrow. “what are ya, five years old?”
he wasn’t quite sure what he had been expecting you to propose, but it certainly wasn’t that. the thought of standing on a children’s toy, awkwardly swinging up and down and up again, was laughable.
you, on the other hand, seemed completely serious as you nodded. “yeah!”
he stared at you for a moment, contemplating whether or not you were messing with him. but your expression was as deadpan as always, giving no hint that you were anything but sincere.
he let out a heavy sigh, rolling his eyes as a look of resignation crossed his face. “fine. let’s go on the damn seesaw.”
you grinned, bounding over to it with way too much energy someone should have in the dead of night. touya rolled his eyes again at your excitement. he was not particularly enthusiastic about going on a child’s toy, but he begrudgingly followed you to the playground. you practically dragged him over to the brightly painted seesaw, eagerly taking a seat on one side.
he reluctantly took a seat on the opposite one, the metal frame of the seesaw creaking under his weight. he glanced over at you, a frown on his face. "this is stupid."
you, on the other hand, were having the time of your life. you bounced up and down on the other end of the seesaw, giggling as the metal frame made squeaking sounds. touya sat on the other side, arms crossed, but you could tell by the way his shoulders were squared that he was trying not to fall off without giving in and actually play.
"come on," you said, gesturing for touya to bounce as well. "it's more fun when both of us are doing it."
"having fun yet?" you called out, still bouncing up and down like a hyperactive child. the metal frame between the two of you was starting to groan in protest.
touya let out a huff. "this is dumb," he repeated. "i'd rather be doing literally anything else right now."
he continued to bounce, but his movements were more restrained than yours. the whole thing seemed so childish, especially with you gleefully giggling away on the other end.
“fine! lets go on the swings then.” you frowned, peeling yourself off the seesaw sadly and trudging over to the swingset.
touya let out a scoff, his hold on you reluctantly loosening “of course its the swings,” he said with a roll of his eyes, shifting his hands to rest on your hips. “you always wanna go on those stupid things.”
“yeah i do. they're the coolest!”
you quickly regained your composure, however, and looked back at touya with a raised eyebrow. "slides are lame. swings are where it's at. you can go up and down!"
he let out a scoff again, shoving his hands into the pockets of his hoodie. "slides are better. they're faster. there's more adrenaline. now c’mon,” he murmured, walking side by side with you, absentmindedly matching the way you walked. left, right. left, right.
touya watched you closely as you sat down, his hands resting gingerly on your shoulders until you were safely seated on the swing. he stood there for a moment, his heart skipping a beat as your hair blew softly in the wind, framing your face with a few strands of hair.
he quickly brushed the feeling aside, shaking his head as he walked around to stand behind you.
“im gonna push you now, alright?”
“‘mkay!”
touya positioned himself behind you, his hands wrapped around the chains of the swing. his heart felt like it was trying to beat out of his chest. he took a deep breath, praying silently that you didn’t notice how nervous he actually was.
“okay, on the count of three…”
he began to count down, softly at first but gaining momentum as he reached the end. on three, he pushed you gently, propelling the swing forwards.
as you began to swing, touya let out a long exhale, his breath leaving him in a shaky whisper. he stood behind you, watching as you soared through the air, a smile on your face bigger than the moon. 
he couldn’t help but notice how… carefree you looked. how your hair would sometimes brush against his knuckles as he pulled you backwards. how you would throw your head back in laughter every time you reached the peak of the swing. touya pushed you again, watching as you ascended even higher this time.
the sight of you swinging back and forth, your hair blowing in the gentle breeze, made his heart flutter. touya couldn’t tear his gaze away from you, his eyes fixated on your figure as you gained momentum.
he swallowed hard, trying to steady his breathing. he didn’t know why he felt so flustered, he had been pushing you on the swings for years.
this time felt different though. maybe it was the way the moonlight shone on your skin, or the way your shoulders shook with quiet giggles.
“push me touya! higher!”
touya let out a scoff of mock annoyance, though he knew he couldn’t deny you. 
“you’re such a pain in the ass,” he muttered under his breath, pushing the swing with more force. 
watching you go higher and higher, your laughter filling the air, touya couldn’t help but smile to himself. he wanted to know what it was like to be up there, to see the moon, and the stars. to feel free, even for just a moment. 
and touya never understood why in movies the main characters always seemed to be ‘stuck in place’. stood there, looking like an idiot as something that could have easily been prevented from happening in front of them. he was old enough to understand that it was for the plot, but he couldn't help but feel frustrated when a character wanders back into the house with a killer in it for the nth time.
but now, he was frozen, his whole body seizing as the you swung up, and up, fingers slipping from the chains and your body falling, encapsulated by nothing but the light of the moon.
time seemed to slow down at that moment. he could hear the thumping of his own heart in his ears, like a primal drum, beating in time with the seconds ticking by.
he tried to call out to you, to warn you about the impending fall, but no sound came out of his agape mouth. he could only watch, feet glued to the ground, as you came back down towards the ground at an increasingly high speed.
touya’s heart skipped a beat, his blood turning to ice as he saw you slip from the swing. he wasn’t sure what overtook him in that moment, but he felt his body moving on its own. 
within seconds, he found himself darting forward, arms outstretched as he tried to catch you midair. panic surged through him like electricity, his thoughts racing a mile a minute.
touya had no time to think, no time to weigh the risks or the consequences of what he was about to do. he acted, pure instinct taking over his body.
he moved with an almost superhuman speed, his long legs covering the distance between you and him in the blink of an eye. touya felt his adrenaline spike as he stretched his arms out towards you, his eyes locked onto your falling form.
he knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that this was a terrible idea. that he was putting himself in danger too. but in that moment, all he cared about was saving you.
time seemed to stretch on into infinity as he caught you, his arms encircling around your waist. he held you tight against his chest, the force of the impact causing him to stumble backwards. 
he fell onto the ground, landing on his back with a thud. the air left his lungs in a sharp exhale, his body tense as he tried to process what had just happened.
for a moment, touya laid there, his chest heaving as he struggled to catch his breath. his arms were still wrapped around you, holding you impossibly close against him.
“....touya?” your voice was small, eyes blown wide and terrified of every little thing that went bump in the night. you were always so strong, never wavering or faltering whenever you were around him. but here, right now, there was nothing you needed more than him.
"i got you," he breathed out, his voice shaky and ragged.
he held you closer, his hold on you tightening almost possessively. touya didn't know why his heart was pounding so hard, why his whole body felt like it was on fire.
he inhaled deeply, savoring the faint scent of your hair. it was a subtle, sweet fragrance that reminded him of wildflowers and sunshine.
"you're okay. i've got you," he repeated, more for his own reassurance than yours.
he sat up slowly, the movement causing him to wince slightly. his back was definitely going to hurt later, but he didn't care about that right now. all he cared about was making sure you were alright.
touya's eyes trailed over your form, searching for any signs of injury. he lifted a hand to gently cup your chin, tilting your face upwards so he could look at you properly.
he didnt know a single thing about taking care of others. didnt know how to put on a bandage, didnt know what medicine was what. didnt know how to comfort anyone, if at all. all he knew was what he saw his mother do, time, and time again.
his gaze softened as he looked into your eyes, taking in the sight of your tear-stained face. the sight tugged at his heartstrings, but he tried his best to keep his emotions in check.
he held your chin a little tighter, his thumb gently rubbing over your skin in a comforting motions.
"you're crying.”
“shut up. no– no ‘m not.”
touya couldn't help but roll his eyes at your reaction. even in moments like these, you were as stubborn as ever.
he let out a huff of amusement, shaking his head slightly as he used his thumb to wipe away the tears from your eyes.
"yeah, yeah, whatever you say," he said in a sarcastic tone. "because your tears are definitely just sweat, right?"
you nodded, shutting your eyes tight as you willed the world to stop spinning. you didn't know how people stomached going skydiving or riding rollercoasters, and you didn't think you ever would.
touya chuckled, his hand moving from your chin to pat your head fondly.
"you're an idiot, you know that?" he teased, his voice softening at the sight of your tear-stained face.
he hated seeing you cry. more than he knew he should.
the butterflies in his stomach stirred as he continued to hold you close, his hand still tangled in your hair. he tried to shake the feeling off, reminding himself that he was just being a good friend. that's all.
but as he sat there, with you in his arms and your tears staining his shirt, he couldn't ignore the fluttering in his chest.
he sat there for a moment, his fingers gently threading through your hair as he tried to catch his breath. he knew he should make sure you were actually okay, that your little stunt didn't actually get you hurt.
but right now, all he could focus on was you. the way your eyelashes fluttered against your skin as you blinked back tears, the way your lower lip trembled ever so slightly.
it was driving him crazy.
“can… can we go home?”
touya's heart ached at the sound of your soft, shaky voice. the way you looked so small and fragile in his arms right now made his chest tighten with an unfamiliar feeling. it was nauseating. you were always so strong around him, but seeing you like this was like flipping a switch in his brain.
he gently patted your head once more, his fingers lingering on your hair for a moment, before nodding.
"yeah," he responded, his voice quiet and hoarse. "yeah, we can go home."
he’d have to sneak you through the window again. as much as he wanted your parents to check you out now, it’d be too much of a risk.
touya's mind raced with thoughts as he helped you up onto your feet, his grip never loosening from your waist. 
he knew the drill by now. he would have to sneak you back into your room through your bedroom window, without getting caught by your parents. he took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart. he could do this. he'd done it several times before.
touya always walked you home after the first night. it was the least he could do, anyways. his father was cruel, but not cruel enough to not raise a gentleman.
and touya didn't mind walking you back home. in fact, there was a secret part of him that actually relished in the time alone with you. the comfortable silence, the gentle brush of your hand against his, the way the dim street lights illuminated your face.
he could pretend, even if just for a moment, that it was just the two of you in the world. no parents, no rules, no responsibilities.
it was a foolish dream, but he clung to it like a lifeline, nonetheless.
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am-i-the-asshole-official · 6 months ago
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AITA for having a mental breakdown over my extremely close friend (accidentally) posting (what I thought was) radfem propaganda?
(🧵🎤for finding later)
It’s a very long story and I’m gonna have so many mixed opinions on this, so buckle up broskies.
I(X, minor) had met 👑(F, at least 4 years older than me) 2 months ago after a close friend of her was exposed as a pedophile. Coincidentally, that same pedophile had spread lies about me being a sociopathic asshole a few months ago, so me and 👑 grew extremely close because of both the aforementioned pedo and also because we shared a favorite manga, and we quickly started talking everyday about our favorite characters from the manga.
Due to our close friendship, I educated 👑 about BPD (a disorder I myself have, this is important), genderfluidity, and radical feminism. And apparently, I should’ve educated 👑 a little more about radical feminism.
Also due to our close friendship, 👑 opened up to me about a traumatic experience she had with her stepdad. This triggered me slight flashbacks to an extremely nasty and messy fight I had with an ex last year, but I didn’t want to seem like I was victim blaming, so I kept my mouth shut.
2~ weeks ago, 👑 posted about the “Man or Bear” question, and chose bear. She also brought up the traumatic experience her stepdad inflicted on her in the tags.
(I personally believe the “Man or Bear” question is radfem propaganda because when women choose bear, they always bring up a traumatic experience a man inflicted on them in some way. To me this sounds like they are saying that all men are misogynists that want to see women suffer, which is obviously not the case.)
When I saw the post, I was quite pissed. Eventually, I saw it another time, and I started having a meltdown. I was actually crying, impulsively vagueposting about her and the post, and eventually when I had to go to sleep I angrily messaged 👑 telling her about the mental breakdown accompanied by a middle finger emoji.
When I woke up and checked my notifications, I saw that 👑 had messaged me 4 times saying she’s sorry, that she didn’t mean ill towards men and that she had deleted the post (which she did, but that did barely anything to comfort me). I, still extremely pissed at 👑, told her about how pissed I was, that I trusted her but now I can’t, and that she should fuck off. 👑 replied by asking if there was anything she could do to regain my trust, so I, in the mood to just make it known that I was extremely pissed, told 👑 to go harass a radfem. And she did.
Later that day, me and 👑 had an important conversation about what had happened. I explained to her that I was holding a grudge against her since she told me about her trauma because it reminded me of the fight between me and my ex, and that I thought she was slowly making her trauma her personality. She understood, and she apologized.
Me and 👑 are now in much better terms, but I am extremely scared that I ruined her opinion on me and that she dislikes me now because she’s an extremely close friend of mine and I had opened up to her about everything bad in my life, and I threw it all away because I didn’t want to be reminded over something that happened a year ago.
TLDR; I held a grudge against my therapist friend for opening up to me about her trauma because I got flashbacks to a fight with an ex, then had a meltdown when she posted about the Man or Bear question, and now I don’t know what to do about our friendship.
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mochamadeleines · 19 days ago
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Sins, Two Through Four <3
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Javi doesnt do good girls. Literally and figuratively.
Theyre nice, sure. Honeyed voices and beautiful eyes. But theyre just not for him. He prefers to stick with what he knows best. Messy, broken, women who are looking to distract themselves with him and his body. Sharp eyes topped with heavy eyeliner and eyeshadow. Women who know what to do with him.
Hes been soiled by the world, therefore belongs with others whove met the same fate. But, hes okay with that. (3.3k words)
tags!! 18+ javier peña x reader ! one shot! inoccent reader i guess?, no set era just vaguely somewhere in the late 80s early 90s :p, since its like entirely from his perspective hes only referred to as Javi and not javier sorry if that bothers u </3, corruption, religious allegories, steve and connie r there for five seconds, dubious I suppose cuz they be drinking, smut but its not like Good and its also there for about five second lolol.., p in v sex, blow jobs, rough sex, lots of depressing internal dialogue for javi Uhhhhhh, Sus thoughts abt causing harm to u I GUESS?? Toxic javi of course lol. kinda bad boy x good girl concept here but he wants to make u WORSE. mannn idk, some dom/sub dynamics if u squinttt
authors notes!! hi! Ok my first Javi fic LOOOOL been binging narcos and i had to take a break from my joel fic in the works to write this shit. I SPENT THE ENTIRE DAY PUMPING THIS OUT AHHHHH Beinf as that ive been working on it For One whole day it may not b my best work but i still had fun!! i kinda like the religious allegories Uhh IM NOT RELIGIOUS OR SCHOLARYLY OR ANYTHING so take whatever i reference with a grain of artsy salt.. enjoy!!!!
Javi doesnt do good girls. Literally and figuratively.
Theyre nice, sure. Honeyed voices and beautiful eyes. But theyre just not for him. He prefers to stick with what he knows best. Messy, broken, women who are looking to distract themselves with him and his body. Sharp eyes topped with heavy eyeliner and eyeshadow. Women who know what to do with him.
Hes been soiled by the world, therefore belongs with others whove met the same fate. But, hes okay with that. 
That brings him to now, at this crowded bar with Steve, later Connie. And you, he guesses. Hes never met you but hes heard of you. Tonight youre tagging along so thats that.
Anyways, Steve is updating him on his daughter and something else about enrolling her in private school but New York City is wildly expensive. Javis caught the eye of a pretty brunette further away from the bar hes sitting at. Shes in a black miniskirt begging to get taken off.
“Stop eye-fuckin’ her, Im talkin’ to you.”
“Relax, Im listening.” Javi takes another drag from his cigarette, tapping away the ash into a tray.”Youre a hard worker, Im sure you can find a way to move up and earn a little more for Olivias private schooling.”
Steve sighs, nursing his beer as he thinks. “Maybe. Just dont wanna be away from her more than i have to be.”
“Mm.”
The brunette beckons him over, and Javi is already sliding off the stool to meet her. “Ill be r-”
“Steve!” 
Connie is here, and so is her-
Friend? 
Youre wearing a baby blue slip with sheer white tights and a thin, white cardigan. Youre pretty. Its only when you introduce yourself and he meets your eyes that hes sure. Youre good. And he doesnt do good. Youre not his type, Javi decides. Lame.
He moves down a seat so you can sit next to Connie whos also next to Steve, and you seem nervous. He gets the feeling you dont come out to places like this a lot. Its too.. Grungy. People smoke inside and get crazy drunk and dance. Probably not your speed. Youre easy to read.
Steve, “Remind me again how you know each other?”
“From work! Shes a nurse.” Connie smiles at Steve first, and then to you. A nurse, of course. Because youre good and its practically oozing off of you. Maybe hes wrong. He hopes hes wrong. Only because youre so pretty, with pretty pink blush and lipgloss. 
You now, “I work in pediatrics.”
You work with children? Jesus christ.
You help people- help your community and take care of children. Javi had to watch children die, over and over, all too complicit each time it happens. No, youre not his type. Hes not into angels. Javi is far from holy and isnt about to desecrate you.
Then there's this feeling that starts to stir in his gut. An ugly feeling that wants to scratch through flesh and bone to get out.  He takes the final drag of his cigarette before smushing it into the ashtray. Why do you bother him so much? Maybe its because upon your arrival that pretty brunette he was eyeing disappeared. A real shame.
But youre here, and your breasts are softly spilling over the neckline of your dress, and while the length is enough to cover your ass when youre standing, the way it looks while youre sitting is a whole different story. Youre good eye candy. Glass half full thinking.
He clears his throat. “How long-” 
The bartender interrupts with a pearly smile. Hes asking if you want anything and hes obviously into you. Annoyingly so.
While youre ordering, Steve and Connie walk away to dance, and Connie stops by Javi, dipping her head to his ear. “Please, please dont fuck my friend.”
Ironic.
“Dont worry,” He leans his elbow on the counter, finishing the rest of his whiskey. “Shes not my type. Go have fun.”
You order three shots of vodka and apple juice. Its a little cute the way you hold your nose while you down each shot and chase it with some juice. Javis on his next glass of whiskey, watching how some of your drink rolls down your collar bone and into the valley of your breasts.
The sight of you is downright sinful. Its not fair.
“You need another shot or are you good now?”
Youre laughing, batting your hand dismissively. “No, No. Im good. I hate alcohol so I wanted to get this part over with and loosen up a little.”
“You dont have to drink it if you dont want to.”
“I like being drunk, just not drinking.”
“Fair enough.”
You fold your hands in your lap, and spin your seat side to side. “You were asking me something earlier?”
“How long have you been a nurse?”
“Three years now. I was working at a different hospital until recently. Thats how I met Connie.”
“Ah.”
“And you? What do you do?”
Javi lets the silence linger a bit. Fuck it. “Uh, CIA- but im retired now.”
“Oh- Yes! Right! Connie- She told me. Im sorry, you probably dont wanna talk about it.”
This is what makes his gums start itching. Most women- who are just as tragic as him- just bat their lashes and tell him its sexy he works for the government.
But you- Youre good. So you actually care about how hes feeling, and arent just trying to fuck him. Maybe that could change?- Ugh- No- no. Just no. Youll be ruined. Youd get dirty and thatd weigh him down like everything else does. Plus, Connie told him not to.
“Um. Have you done anything fun recently? Aside from all that?” Cute how you try to change the subject to spare his feelings.
Javi breaks open a new pack of cigarettes, slipping one out and putting it between his lips, then flicks his lighter on. Once, twice. A fifth time. No dice. The fucking thing ran out fluid. 
“Fuck,” He grumbles.
“Ah! Hold on!”
An eyebrow is raised.
You dig through your purse, and pull out a disposable lighter. You thumb the sparkwheel a couple times to get the flame going.
“Do you mind?”
Javi hums no and leans forward. You do too, cupping your hand over the flame in case it goes out. It lights, and he gets a good drag in.
“Thank you.”
“Youre welcome.” And youre smiling again and Javi wants to shake you around and see where youre hiding your halo. Hes good at getting information out of people. He could get you to confess.
“Any reason you carry around a lighter?”
“Uhh. For medicinal purposes.”
“Cheeky.”
You spin in your chair once, all the way around then wobble when you stop. Javi shoots his arm out to grab yours and keep you steady. 
“Careful.” 
“Thanks.” A short breath. “Still think I need another shot?”
Javi smirks. “Oh, definitely.”
And youre ordering two shots. Bold.
“To answer your question, I havent done any fun things, no- Oh actually, you know what? I went to the art museum the other day.”
“The MET?”
“Mhm.” 
“I went there a few months ago! Its beautiful isnt it? Do you have a favorite exhibit?”
“Probably European sculptures. The ones under the skylights were my favorite.”
“Yeah, those are beautiful.” You look off, dreamy. 
Youre a childrens nurse, youre bad at drinking, you like art, and Javier feels sick just sitting next to you. Theres so much ugly out there, hes sure youre aware, and yet youre as bright as ever infront of him. Youd probably fit right in with The Triumph of the Church. 
 Theres only one word that can describe that ugly feeling swirling in him. 
Envy. He wishes he could be as untouchable as you feel right now.
Theres a push and pull. He wants to taste your lips and roll up your dress and roughen you up, but he cant- he shouldnt. You dont deserve to get felt up by someone so unclean.
And yet,
Your beautiful smile, one that always reaches your eyes, and your precious laugh, and the way youve been nervously playing with your hands this entire time makes him want to break you. To rip those wings out and keep you from flying. 
Javi really is devilish.
“Okay, shot time!” You push one of the glasses towards him. 
“Im not taking a shot,” He takes another puff from the cigarette, then lets it rest on the ashtray.
“C’mon, Javier! Pleeeeeaaaase?” 
“Javi.” He emphasizes.
“Okay.” You nod, “Javi, please?”
“Fine.”
Alright, alright. It didnt take much, but to be fair ‘please’ and ‘Javi’ just sound so good together when you say it. 
Clink! 
You count to three, and together you take the shot. Javi only grimaces at the taste and youre scrambling for the juice after letting go of your nose. Youre so damn messy about it too. Javi gets the bartender to get some napkins.
“I think I'm done,” You cough.
“I think youre done too.” He smiles, “Do you normally spill your drinks on yourself?” 
You patiently hold still while Javi wipes down your mouth, then your chin, then your collarbone, careful to not get too close to your chest. He eyes the dainty necklace that carries your first name initial. 
“Noooo, it all just happens so fast, you know? Oh! And thank you for cleaning me up.” Youre smacking your lips together, “Ah shit, my gloss.” 
“Yeah, looks like you ate it all in the chaos.” He glances over at the four shot glasses, all stained.
You groan after digging through your purse. “Fuck, I left my compact at home.”
“Being a girl seems hard.”
“It is.” You sigh, albeit dramatic. “Ill be back.”
You slide off the stool and almost eat shit actually. At least Javi is there to catch you. Again. This might be a recurring theme tonight considering how many drinks you had. Must be a lightweight.
“Im sorry- Fuck, Im so sorry,” Youre laughing again, and it gets a laugh out of him too. Back on the stool you go.
“If you fall again Im not gonna catch you.”
“Thats okay, I wouldnt catch me either.” 
Javi thinks for a moment, curious. 
“I could, yknow, put the gloss on you. If you want.”
“Really? Youd do that?”
Your eyes are big and bright, lashes accentuated by your mascara. The way you look at him makes him feel oddly special. Its not sultry, or wanting. You have this natural allure to you. Angelic. That alone makes him want to touch you again. To yank you down from the clouds.
“Yeah, gimmie the gloss.”
You put it in his palm and lean towards him. Javi messes with the applicator, listening to the squish of product inside the tube. Seems easy enough.
Javi situates himself more comfortably in the chair, then holds your chin as he applies it. Youre well behaved the entire time, like he expected, except for the fact that you lost your balance again and gripped onto his thigh to keep you from falling. He clears his throat. There are blaring alarms in his head telling him to put distance between you both.
“Sorry.”
“Its alright. I dont mind.”
You swallow nervously. Any angel would be nervous if they were this close to an agent of hell. Get it? Agent?
Javi tucks away the fly aways first. The applicator swipes across your bottom lip, and hes squinting at the little sparkles in the gloss. Its a nice touch. His thumb rubs away any excess to keep it neat.
“Good job for not falling again.” 
“I had some help.” And youre both grinning now.
“Mkay, all done.” 
You smack your lips, nodding. “Thank you.”
This is the moment where Javi should let you go. He should excuse himself and find someone who isnt you, someone whos filthy just like him, and have them instead.
You tilt your head in his palm, letting him cradle your face.
But youre so pretty, and youre so sweet, and youre right there. 
That feeling from earlier is bubbling up again, the need to ruin you. You might look prettier covered in bite marks and sweat, with your hair messed up and your recently applied gloss all gone. Again. 
He shouldnt.
But then again, what are sinners even good for if not this? Converting others and carrying on the missions of the Devil himself, you know, the works. Fuck, its not like he wasnt doing it anyways. Shout out to the government.
Javi observes you, trying to make a decision. “Hey,” 
“Hiii.” 
“Can I take you home?” 
Its was easy, and you were so well behaved about it too. You did a little nervous yapping on the way to his apartment but it was cute. He learned you had a pet cat, and he tells you about the dog he grew up with. You talk about the shitty weather recently and Javi tells you he got rained on and slipped going up the stairs. It settles your nerves. Good. His phone keeps ringing in the glove compartment, but he just tells you to ignore it. Steve no doubt.
He makes sure to hold your hand on the way up to his apartment, giving it a squeeze before he lets go to open the door.
Javi’s heart never usually pounds this hard bringing any woman to his place, and its downright sinnister how excited he is. 
When the door closes, you both leave your shoes at the door. 
“Want anything? I dont have any apple juice but I can give you orange juice? Water if you want that instead?” 
“Orange juice sounds good.”
You begin to linger about his living room. Youre probably getting a feel for how impersonal it all is. Plain. His room is a bit more interesting, at least. 
Javi hands you the glass and shucks off his leather jacket, draping it over one of the kitchen chairs.
The first time he kisses you, is while walking through to the entrance of his bedroom. One hand gripping your hip and the other cradling the back of your head. He swallows ever whimper, every sigh, every squeak until the back of his knees hit the edge of the mattress. Javi pulls away, watching the string of spit snap and cling to your bottom lip.
“Are you good at following directions?”
“Yes-Yes. I am.” You choke out.
Now sat on the bed, “Great. On your knees then.” 
Tonight, youre going to pray. Youre going to sing.
You hesitate to get down, but do it with no complaints. Javi stretches over to the bedside table, grabbing a spare pack of cigarettes and lighter. 
Your eyes are on him, patiently waiting for another command. 
He continues to smoke at a leisurely pace, petting your head and caressing the apples of your cheeks. Youre leaning into his hand affectionately again.
Youre hit with some of the excess smoke he breathes out, coughing a bit. 
“Javi-”
“No more talking. Understand?”
A beat passes, and you nod again, only shuffling forward to rest your head on the inside of his thigh. Javi taps away the ash.
“Good girl.”
You stay down there for a little while, only squirming and wiggling to relieve the soreness settling into your knees. You dont talk, you dont whine, you dont go grabbing at him. You stay put because he didnt tell you to do anything else. Youre good. Angels are loyal to a fault.
When you do get a command, youre perking up like a dog. Cute. Javis telling you to take his cock out.
You go for it, and he tuts at you. “Do it slow.”
And so, youre doing it slowly now, pulling out the leather from under the buckle, opening it up and then popping open the button to his jeans. Your lips press into a thin line, looking up at him for reassurance.
“Go on.”
His zipper is pulled down at a snails pace, and your eyes widen at the lack of underwear. No surprise there. Javi sighs when you take him your hand. 
He lets you feel him up curiously, your thumb wisping over his flushed tip, smearing along the white beads gathering there. 
“Put it in your mouth.”
You stiffen, unsure. Javis reminded that youre good and you probably dont do this kind of thing a lot. 
“Its not hard, nena. Promise. Want me to teach you?”
Youre nodding now, more eagerly.
“Start by kissing it.”
Tentatively, you kiss starting from the bottom up- That much you know how to do- So its a good start. He sighs out the last bit of smoke and stretches over to the bedside again to put out the cigarette. 
After kissing, youre licking, and after licking, youre finally trying to swallow him. He groans, holding the back of your head and coaxing you to take more.
You gag, backing out to catch your breath then taking him in again.
“Jus’ like that- Fuck-”
And somehow the slight inexperience gives you the upperhand. You want to be good for him, and your  clumsy hands are doing as much as they can to make up for your lack of deep-throating capabilities.
Its when you suck harshly on the head that he hunches forward with a gasp. “Yeah-Yes.”
You do it again, and again, and hes so fucking close now but he stops you. Not yet.
“You did good.” Javi reassures you. “Get up.”
You wobble up onto your feet and hes pulling you into a kiss, hands exploring you all over with urgency. He needs it now, to do what he wanted to do at the bar when he first started talking to you. He needs to drag you down with him.
Javi pulls your cardigan off, and then your dress, and as more layers of your clothing come off the more he cant wait. Youre moaning under his tongue, only squirming when he nips at the flesh of your torso, leaving a trail of blossoming bruises in his wake. He tells you to lay down and you follow accordingly. 
Javi kisses up your stomach, and the junction between your neck and shoulder. You almost speak, almost. And it has his dick harder than he thought it could get. Youre still obeying. Fucking incredible.
He pulls your hips forward, making you whimper. A finger traces through your folds, and he practically gushes with pride just feeling what hes done to you so far. He hasnt even gotten to the best part.
“Talk to me,”
Youre babbling now, “K-Keep touching me- Dont stop. Please, Javi.” There it is again. ‘Please’ and ‘Javi’. He cant say no to someone whos been so reverent thus far.
He rewards you by tracing soft circles around your clit, watching the way your abdomen flexes at the pressure. The combination of nervousness and arousal has your thighs quaking around his forearm. You give in so easy. 
Javi tells you to lay on your stomach, Then, hes pressing kisses up your spine to soothe you. To sedate you. 
You practically crumble when his cock reaches all the way inside you. This is it. Hes going to rip those obnoxious fucking wings out of your back.
“Javi,” You wheeze, clawing at the sheets. His hand sits on the nape of your neck to keep you pinned down. Javi grunts, doubling forward over your back. Its almost like hes punishing your guts just because youre you. 
He grabs your wrists instead, pulling them behind your back and anchoring himself with one hand. The other curls into your hair, yanking your head up from the pillow you covered in drool. 
You sob, trembling when Javi buries himself to the hilt. Hes panting over your neck like a dog, licking and nipping there like one too.
“Thank you,” You sniffle, twisting your neck to get a glimpse of him. Your mascaras running down your face. Humble, even in the face of your own sacrilege. 
Javi shushes you with a sloppy kiss. Hell only accept your thanks when hes finally run you dry.
Tonight is the night you fell from grace. All because of him.
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bellarkeselection · 11 months ago
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Cross My Heart Promise
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Gif belongs to @miyagiverse
Request from Wattpad Treassuredavis33 reader has cancer and is in the hospital while Cole is her boyfriend she tells him to promise her something on her almost deathbed.
Tag list- send me an ask to be added @cognacdelights @connieisthesun @bbabycass
The Walter family had been forced to remain in the living room by Cole’s request when I collapsed on our date out tonight. I tried to lie and say it was nothing but now there was no way of keeping it a secret. He would know sooner rather than later I suppose now. Laying in the hospital bed I had an iv in my left arm. My hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail done by my boyfriend. “Y/n, I finally got the doctors to let me see you. What’s wrong?”
Cole came into the room dragging a chair right up to my bedside where I could see true concern in his green eyes. “Cole, I’m fine. I just…how much did the doctors tell you?”
“Nothing. They said that they will only talk with your parents or relatives. So what exactly is going on?” He asked me running his fingers through his hair.
Laying my head further back against the pillow I sighed tiredly. For our date we went riding out on horses like we did on our first date. He was riding in front of me while I felt myself getting dizzy and I fell off my horse. “I should have told you before now. I just didn’t know how you would react or if I could handle telling you what is going on because it scares me really bad…” I felt tears falling down my face getting emotional over this.
Unfortunately at the age that I am the doctor found out that the cancer that my mother had was passed down to me. My hair had started thinning meaning that it would start falling out soon. “Hey, hey, don’t cry on me. Just tell me what’s going on and I can try to fix it.” He reached forward, wiping away tears that had fallen.
“You can’t fix what is going to happen, Cole. So I decided that we should just end things now before we get too involved with each other.” I admit avoiding his gaze.
He shook his head confused. “Why would we end things? I know I’m not good at the whole boyfriend thing but I don’t want to break up with you.”
“Cole, we really can’t afford to be together anymore. I’m not good for you -“ He cut me off climbing up to sit on the edge of the bed and holding my face in his hands so I’d look him in the eye.
“That’s ridiculous Y/n. If anything I am not good for you. I normally do hookups and commit with girls. Until I met you…I want a real relationship with you.”
Blinking through my eyes I sniffed. “You’d want to be with someone who has cancer?”
“That’s what you weren’t wanting to tell me. Why did you think you couldn’t tell me about something? That’s a big deal to have cancer.” Cole declared in a baffled tone,
Shaking my head I felt more tears coming down. “Be for real, Cole. You don’t want to date someone who has cancer. You’re the popular guy at school and could have anyone else. I understand that so I’m ending this so you don’t have to deal with all the stress later down the road.”
“What makes you think that I’d want to break up with you over that? I don’t care about my reputation. It's ridiculous to me that people don’t consider I might be more than the guy who sleeps around.” He rests his forehead against mine. “I’d want to be with you no matter what Y/n L/n.”
Placing my head against his chest he wrapped his arms around my waist. We let silence fill the hospital room. He had his whole family in the room and they had all been concerned since I had a relationship with each of them. Cole kissed my forehead hearing me sniffing through some more tears.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I was just afraid you’d walk away from me.” I mumbled into his brown jacket clutching my fingers on his forearms.
Cole slightly pulled away from me and I saw some tears coming down his face too. “I’d never leave you because of your illness. I freaking have feelings for you so bad that I don’t want anything bad to happen to you. I want to make you happy and everything else. So you’d never be just a hook up to me.”
“I can’t believe you’re sticking around for me, Cole. I….I want a real relationship with you too.” I wrapped my arms around him in a tight hug and he hugged me back blinking away more tears.
A few minutes later he felt me draw away from him where he tilted his head downward to my gaze. “What’s wrong, Y/n?”
“Now that we talked about my situation there’s something I want to ask of you.” I trailed off and he nodded letting me keep talking. “I need you to promise me something important. I need you to promise me that you’ll be nice to Jackie if things get worse for me.”
Cole shakes his head not wanting to think about the worst happening. “Things aren’t going to get bad for us. Not while we are together.”
“I know you don’t want to talk about that. I don’t either but it is possible. So promise me, promise me that you will be nicer to her. She doesn’t deserve someone being mean to her after the trauma she has to deal with….so as your girlfriend I’m asking that you promise me this.” Squeezing his shoulder blades in my nails he didn’t waste a second in kissing me slowly.
I leaned into the kiss lightly smiling and he broke it whispering under his breath. “We’re gonna get through this, Y/n. But I do promise to be better around her for you.”
“Thank you, Cole. I appreciate it…” I smiled feeling him climb in on the other side of the bed once I scooted over. Cole wrapped his arms around me and I cling onto his embrace before we just let silence fill the room. Not wanting to talk about the struggles of me having cancer just yet. So we remained just holding onto one another for comfort.
Comments really appreciated ❤️
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sixosix · 5 months ago
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END NOTE | THAWED
a little love letter to my readers
to start off, i know that the series is based off the entire reputation album, but i like to think that this whole series was written around call it what you want.
how it started LMFAOOO
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This was previously titled ‘melt’ before i was like ‘nah ill make it, like, thaw” and earthtooz went, “Thawed?” little did earth know,, that name would literally take over my docs,,, my tags,,, my ENTIRE account
A message to my readers: From the bottomest bottom of my heart, if you have reached this series until the very end, thank you so, so much for reading. Read that sentence again. And again, until you realize how grateful I truly am as a writer. Thawed is such a big project that I still can’t believe I was able to even start. I genuinely never thought it would garner this much attention, and in all honestly, I was intimidated by it, because I had no idea what I was doing, and I was afraid I would disappoint.
This entire project was intimidating, and I considered so many times to just drop it and end it on chapter five. I struggled so badly to write after I introduced the characters, and I thought: “well, that’s it. I guess it was fun.” I even told my friends that I would do that; and yet 14 chapters later, look at where we are now 😭
Writing it was so exhausting. Working on a series while studying as a student really makes it difficult to remember details about my own story T__T I had to reread Thawed so many times to the point where I don’t even like it anymore.
But I know the reason why I decided to continue it! It sounds so horribly cliche, but it’s true. It’s thanks to all your overwhelming support :( Each ask, comment, reblog—they all fueled me more than you think. All those replies of even incoherent gibberish made me realize that, ‘hey, someone read it and liked it enough to send an ask about it. Maybe I am doing something right!!!!’
some thawed extras for readers who are interested
If you haven’t noticed, the chapter titles aren’t actually accurately about the chapter. Those titles were taken from the songs in the Reputation album, in order. And the chapters are loosely based around them!
reputation is, like, widely known as the edgy album from taylor, but in reality its such a big love letter and i know that other people noticed that, too! i think it’s very fitting to the story of thawed: it’s dark and messy, but at the end of the day, it’s a love story. do you get what i mean hehe. i hope that’s how the series came across…
im sorry if aether doesnt appear in the last chapter :( in my head, mc is coming home. and by then i dont think aether would be in fontaine at all! but rest assured they definitely have met up twice or thrice while in the other regions heehee. Also aether will ofc be there for their weeding. 🙏
i have nothing much else to say aside from thank you for reading! i hope u enjoyed thawed as much as i did
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watermelonlovershigh · 1 year ago
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Can you write something where Reader had taken care of Harry all night because he was sick and then she has to wake up to care for their child and maybe the child wants to give Harry cuddles to make him feel better.
Sick Daddy /concept/
AN: had this in my inbox for a while but am trying to clear some of my requests out so here you finally go. its very short because this ask just felt like it didn't need to be crazy long. hope you enjoy still. send you feedback. xoxo
This story contains: mentions of throw up, the rest is fluff
{ husbandrry - dad!harry - any harry era }
word count- 566
You and your son Oliver make Harry a breakfast to hopefully feel better because he'd been sick the previous night. Then after Harry's better, you and Ollie catch the same bug and Harry takes care of you both as you did for him.
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You'd been up off and on with Harry all night. He seemed to have caught some type of stomach bug and nearly every hour of the night woke up to be sick. Though Harry insisted you just stay in bed, of course you were gonna be right by his side. Placing a little clip in his hair to hold his bangs out of his face and rub his back as he heaved over the toilet.
Now it's eight in the morning and your little one, Oliver, who's five, is awake. Though you're dead tired from you lack of sleep, you go into Ollies bedroom and help him get dressed and brush his teeth. Once that's all done, Oliver asks, "Where's daddy? Wanna go see him."
Kneeling down to his level, you reply, "Daddy's feeling a bit ill today, loves. He'll probably be in bed for a while. But, how about you help mummy make daddy some tea and toast to hopefully feel better."
With a concerned look on his small face, Oliver nods, "Alright, mummy. Then can I cuddle daddy? Daddy cuddles me when I don't feel very well so it might make him feel better."
Thinking for a moment, you answer, "Maybe. We'll have to see. I don't want you catching whatever bug he has though."
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Oliver helped you prepare an easy breakfast for Harry. One that will hopefully not bother his stomach. Once it's ready, you carry it on a tray and Ollie walks up the stairs beside you, excited to finally see his daddy today.
When you walk in the bedroom, Harry is curled up under the covers sleeping, a thin layer of sweat coating his skin. You set the tray down and nudge his shoulder, "Harry babe, wake up for me. Got you something to drink and eat that you'll hopefully be able to keep down."
Harry slowly turns over and sits up. With his very messy bed-head, he croaks out, "Awe, thank you, m'love. I'll try to eat some of it. Not really that hungry though."
Oliver steps to the side of the bed and asks, "Daddy sick?"
Harry looks down and answers, "Yeah baby, daddy's tummy hasn't been well. But mummy is the best doctor around so I'm sure I'll be good to go in no time."
Harry sat in bed and munched on his plain toast and sipped his tea while you and Oliver sat at the foot of the bed to keep him company. After some persuasion, you finally let Oliver cuddle Harry. You knew it was a risk of him getting sick too but you were also at risk from just being in the same house as him.
Luckily Harry was able to keep that food down and with some more rest, got to feeling better within twelve hours. Unluckily to you and Ollie though, two days later you both woke up to sick tummies and it was Harry's turn to play doctor. With the amount of vomit he had to clean up he should become a professional cleaner.
It got so bad that he had to migrate everyone to the living room where he could watch you both at the same time. One moment holding up the barf bucket for Oliver and the next moment holding it up for you. He gave y'all tons of cuddles and extra love and within a day everyone was well again.
(PLEASE REBLOG BECAUSE WRITING IS NOT EASY AND IT'S FREE SO JUST DO IT)
(no more tags are allowed because i've hit my number limit. sorry : ( )
tag list: @one-sweet-gubler // @harryscherrysugar // @hsfanficsrecss // @lollypopsx // @harrycanyonmoonn // @itfeelslikemytherapisthatesme // @damnasstyles  // @mrsstylesharry // @softmullet  // @meetmyblondemuffins  // @thegirlnextdoorssister // @stanleystyles  // @haarrrys // @michellekstyles  // @skyangel57   // @the-gardener-31 // @lhharrylilpumpkin // @yousunshine-youtemptress // @clairestylessss  // @kissmyaxe140  // @goldenmelonsugar-hi // @kaitieskidmore97 // @florencepughily  // @alienorknight //@dancearoundthelivingroom  // @swiftmendeshoran
 // @luv-flor7777  // @alohastyles-x // @tenaciousperfectionunknown  // @sleutherclaw // @siredtohybrid // @whoscamila // @a-strange-familiar  // @golden-elodie // @mrspeacem1nusone //  @goldenkhae // @lntwithhrry  // @shadowygladiatorlight  // @manifestrry  //@mendesblurb // @sunshinemoonsposts  // @depersonalizationsucks // @academiaghost // @zendayassimp // @reveriehs // @vsnnstuff // @dancinsunflowerkiwi // @quinnsgrapejuice // @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite // @justlemmeholdyou // @hsonlyangelxo // @luvonstyles // @howdey
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My Masterlist Masterpost
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hvghes · 1 year ago
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can u write sum ab luke having a kid but u were the babysitter and luke falls for u😮 (the mom isn’t really in the picture cuz we won’t be that messy🤣)
how you get the girl - l.hughes
set later in the future warnings: none i think
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luke hughes, never did he expect to have a baby. that was until one day someone left a child at his doorsteps. that was almost a year ago, things were easier in the off season but once season hit he needed to find a babysitter. much to his luck he found someone who was able to watch his baby while he had games and practices. hockey surroundings were not most suitable for a young baby.
“and everything is still in the same places they should be. thank you again i know it was last minute you’re a life savior.” luke said before grabbing his hockey bag heading off to practice.
you loved babysitting for luke, his baby girl was such a delight, never gave you a hard time spending most of your time cuddled up on the couch. today was no different, you and ellie, lukes baby were cuddled up on his couch sleeping when luke got back from practice. he placed his bag down quietly before placing a blanket on you and the baby smiling to himself.
he tried to deny his feelings but seeing you care so much for his kid and how much his kid adores you, he couldn’t help but to think to himself his feelings for you.
another hour passed before you and ellie woke up and luke was sitting right next to you guys watching tv quietly.
“sorry did i wake you?” luke said turning the tv down more. “no dont worry, sorry i fell asleep ill head out now.” you said before sitting up gently handing ellie to him standing up, before he pulled you down. “its fine stay, dinner is almost done and she likes it better when you feed her and i was hoping we could talk after.” he said and you were nervous for the talk but nodded and sat back down. what if he didnt need you anymore, what was going on.
after feeding ellie and putting her to bed luke was putting away the dishes before you hopped up on the counter next to him.
“what’d you need to talk about?” you said looking down at him, voice clearly nervous. he stood between your legs looking up at you before letting out a shaky breath “this might be a lot but, i really like you. i haven’t liked anyone in this long. i know you’re a babysitter and its your job but you care so much for ellie and always respect my schedule, always dropping anything to be here, and ellie loves you. you’re super sweet and i stay up late at night thinking about what itd be like if you were mine, its okay if you dont-“ you cut off his rambles with a kiss. his hands cupped your cheek while yours held onto the collar of his shirt pulling him closer.
after pulling away you whispered to him “i like you too.” he let out a sigh of relief before kissing you again. glad he finally got the courage to get his girl.
tags: nini my fav @ghostfacd !!
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