#my sister as a rodeo clown

[fel-ix665]

Here are just some sketch dumps that I did throughout this year and last year. :O

[wh0rezs]

MIRRORBALL

PAIRING: SULLIES X HUMAN ADOPTED DAUGHTER/SISTER! READER

SUMMARY: Being the Sullies only human child is much more difficult than most realize described by Taylor Swift’s “Mirrorball”

WARNINGS: angst, mentions of parents death, abandoned issues, seeking comfort in anyone, major character death (not Neteyam)

“And they called off the circus”

“Burned the disco down”

Your family at the RDA was something you called a circus. Not all only was it your soldier mother and your scientist father but Grace Augustine and Max Patel. Parker Selfridge even took you under his wing, and your mother’s team lifted you onto their shoulders.

Trudy took you flying, Grace gave you piggyback rides on her avatar body, Colonel Quaritch would let you fire a gun, Lyle once let you glue a wig onto his bald shiny head. Your own circus. You were even deemed “honorary sister” to the child growing in Paz’s stomach. The RDA was like non-stop disco but everything good must come to an end.

And the end came with Jake Sully. You liked Jake, he was buff soldier surrounded by a bunch of skinny armed scientists, and he raced you in his wheelchair. But something changed when Jake got accepted into Omaticaya.

The scientists left RDA, moving to remote location and along with them went your father. Your mother cursed his name, saying he had gone soft hearted on the animals which plagued this earth. You felt trapped but you still had some of your circus left.

But then it burned down. A war came with both of parents fighting on the opposite sides of it. Your father in his avatar body and your mother in her helicopter. You were left alone with Max Patel, praying that they would both come back to you. Neither of them did.

Your mother had been taken out by Ikrans and your father was shot repeatedly in his avatar and then choked on Pandora’s air.

So your circus was called off and the disco burned down.

“When they sent home the horses”

“And the rodeo clowns”

After the war, humans were forced to leave, expected you and MJ. You watched as Jake, Norm and many other Omaticaya guided your family into the ship.

You had hidden out of sight but Parker Selfridge had seen you. You liked Parker. He had sure you were entertain expect that one time he forced you into school. Your parents often describe him as a clown, so you did too. But you mentioned right in front his face.

You remember everyone in the room going silent, waiting Parker’s reaction. He laughed, saying that you had spunk. Oftentimes when he was taking care of you, he would carry on the circus theme by calling the workers under him horses.

Yet here they were leaving you. You knew they did terrible things but they were your circus. Parker nodded his head for you to come out, so you did, running to him for one last hug.

“You gonna be alright,kid. I am giving you my number in case you need to call but I heard that Sully has adopted you, per your father’s request.” Parker spoke as he wrapped his arms around your back. Parker would never admit to it but he really thought of you as his kid.

A large blue landed on your shoulder, pulling you away. Jake stood way above you and signaled for Parker to start walking again. Once he reached the plane’s entrance, he waved and headed inside. You turned into Jake’s legs and cried.

They had sent home the horses and rodeo clowns.

“I’m still on that tightrope”

Before your father met his untimely demise, he asked Jake to watch over you if he died. Jake honored his promise. He had spoken to Neytiri many times about you and Neytiri knew your father’s avatar, so she agreed.

The whole adoption process was like walking on a tightrope. You had to balance out, carefully staying on that thin line. Most Omaticaya couldn’t say stuff to you, due to you being the Olo’eyktan’s daughter but you didn’t want to lose your balance, tipping off any of them. Omaticaya would never really accept you as human, especially after what they did as Hometree. Many of the People would send glances full of fury with their hands tightening around their bows.

Your adopted parents took care of you but soon they were welcoming a son. An Na’vi son. One who looked like them.

So you remained on that tightrope once Neteyam, your brother, was born.

“I’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me”

You found yourself in Parker’s position, a mascot. The human mascot for the growing family of the Sullies. You liked your baby siblings but they couldn’t tell you how proud they were of you.

As the mascot, you tried to keep your family happy. Trying to get them laughing even on the days when your adopted mother would send hateful gazes towards you.

Soon you realize that you just power through those days, and still make sure your family was laughing.

“I'm still a believer but I don't know why”

You liked to believe, considering yourself a believer. You liked to believe that you were the first born Na’vi daughter of the Sullies, a profound warrior like your mother or future Tsahík like your grandmother.

Yet you were pulled back into reality as you peered at your reflection in a stream. You had your father’s eyes with your mother’s hair. You shared their skin color, which wasn’t a blue.

You like to believe that they were still alive,too. You and them had nice little cottage inside the forest along with your human brother, Spider. Your mother help teach young Omaticaya fighting while your father took care of injuries. Spider and you grew up close with the Sullies, and at night your small family would join them, then walk to the cottage.

Yet once again you pulled back into reality as you heard Jake shout your name, calling out it was lunchtime.

You were a believer yet with painful stuff to believe and you didn’t know why.

“I've never been a natural”

“All I do is try, try, try”

Contrary to what any people believe, you couldn’t do anything relating to Na’vi training.

Unlike your siblings, you couldn’t shoot an bow nor climb a tree under 3 minutes. You couldn’t fish, hunt or fight. You were useless. Your father would tell you nonsense, saying you helped Mo’at and Kiri with healing and injuries but you couldn’t help your feelings.

So all you did was train but you were no natural. Even Spider could do more than you, but you tried. And tried. Tried again but your abilities never honed.

You weren’t a natural at anything but you did try, try again and try.

“I'm still on that trapeze”

Many years had passed since your adoption and you finally made it off the tightrope, yet now you were on a trapeze. Swinging from being a honorary Omaticaya to trying to catch onto being a human. Luckily, this time you had Spider being your trapeze partner.

Spider knew the pains of being a human in a Na'vi world but sometimes he felt closer to the Omaticaya unlike you. You felt at home with humans considering 7 years of your life you were raised by the RDA. So you lost your trapeze partner, flipping onto one bar waiting for the other one to come without the force of another.

So you were still on that trapeze.

“I'm still trying everything”

“To keep you looking at me”

In the forest, you had always tried to have someone’s eyes on you but in Awa'atlu you can’t get away from watchful eyes. As your family settled into the ways of Metkayina’s, you remained a stranger.

Strange and dangerous creature is what the Metkayina would tell their children, as they glares bullets into your skull. Then after a half of year living with them, the RDA found your family again.

Everything after that point was a blur, you can remember Lo‘ak leaving to rescue his ‘brother’, your siblings and you with the help of the Metkayina children pulling off the tracker off of Payakan.

Then the ship came and some of your siblings were taken but you and Neteyam saved them. Lo'ak convincing Neteyam to rescue Spider, which you three did but then every stopped.

You had pushed your three brothers into the water, has you held off the avatars. Just you were about to jump into the water, a searing pain flared in your chest— a bullet had hit you. Stumbling into the water, your brothers cheered until you announced you were shot.

You were brought to an rocky island where Tsireya began to address your wound while your brothers comforted you— Spider holding your hand as he talked about your childhood with him— as your parents arrived. Your final wish was to see home again— your circus, rodeo clowns and horses. To stop believing, and trying. To finally come down from that tightrope and trapeze.

You felt peace as you walked through the forest,reveling in your new home with your father and godmother Grace.

Jake and Neytiri were brought to first time you three were a family. Oftentimes, you would flicker in between you as child to you as an adult. Though you would always mutter the same sentence.

“I tried everything to keep you looking at me.”

[echoingbirdsofprey]

Lightning On My Lips (Every Time You Kiss Me)

15 - Don't Wanna Wind Up Missin' You

Pairing: Tyler Owens x OFC Georgia Tennley

Rating: Explicit (MDNI!)

Warnings: mentions of pregnancy and heavy emotions for both Ty and Gee

A/N: The puppies!!!!!

Playlist

The hum of the diesel engine was a welcome sound as Tyler, Georgia, and Boone drove toward his home in Arkansas. He was going to drop Boone off in Little Rock where, with the paycheck Tyler provided him for the season, the ex-rodeo-clown was going to buy himself a truck. That truck was going to get turned into something similar to Tyler’s for next season so over the off-season they had a lot of work to do. 

And Tyler had a conversation he had to have with Georgia. He waited until he knew Boone was fast asleep. Luckily, and unluckily, Boone was the heaviest sleeper Tyler had ever met. On the seat next to him, were the three puppies, Grits, Waffles, and Pancake, all curled together, soaking in the warmth from Boone's sleeping form. Tyler reached over the center console for Georgia’s hand.

“Hey.” He said softly, gaining her attention. She took his hand and squeezed, smiling wide. He brought her hand up to his lips, softly brushing over the back. His tone was low so as not to wake the puppies more so than Boone. “I'm gonna talk to your momma about the house.”

“Okay.” Georgia said flatly and Tyler raised a brow.

“Just okay?” He asked and Georgia’s stare turned hard.

“I just don't want to piss Emmaleigh off anymore than she already is...” She said and he intertwined his fingers in between hers and squeezed reassuringly. 

“You don't worry about that. I'll go to war, figuratively of course, to get what I need to provide for you and my...sorry...our kid.” He murmured and Georgia felt tears well for a second. 

“I just don't wanna lose her too...” She said and Tyler understood what she meant.

“If your sister doesn't want to be involved with you because you took the house off her hands that she didn't want in the first place so that she could get exactly what she wants...she's not gonna be supportive of anything else that you and I do. How do you think she's gonna react to you bein’ pregnant? Especially since it's my kid? You know she hates me anyway. So make it be all my fault. I'm okay with that.” Tyler explained and Georgia stayed quiet for a few moments while she digested his thoughts. He made a good point. Emmaleigh never liked Tyler, so she certainly wouldn't be happy to hear that he was having a kid with her sister, let alone anything to do with the house. And he was right about the house. Eleanor, their mother was constantly texting Georgia saying, ‘guess what your sister is complaining about today’ and rattling off issues about the house. She was definitely getting tired of it, and she wished her mother were still in state. 

“Y’know, Ty, every time you’re around, nothin’ can be normal. I mean...in a little over two weeks, we got back together, I’m probably pregnant, you just bought three puppies, Boone is basically living with us at the moment, we’re driving to fuckin’ Arkansas, after we just survived a giant fuckin’ tornado, and fixed your truck in less than a day and...jesus...” Georgia rattled off everything that had happened and Tyler just chuckled. He could tell she wasn't complaining because she had a huge grin on her face as she said everything and she laughed at the end of the list.

“No, no, no, not ‘normal’. The word you’re lookin’ for is ‘boring’. Boring is not a problem for me. Ever. And...” Tyler’s smirk was wide as Georgia interrupted him. 

“Oh and you asked me to marry you too. That was the most unexpected part of all of this. Like, the tornado wasn’t even that wild.” She said with a smile.

“I did that, yes...wait, did you think I was just gonna getcha pregnant and not put a ring on your finger? You should know by now I ain’t that kinda guy, Gee.” Tyler mused as he kissed her hand again, this time taking his eyes off the road fully and looking at her through lascivious sage orbs.

“No, I just wasn’t expecting you to ask so soon, I guess.” She shrank in her seat a little under his gaze, feeling like she needed to hide from the intensity of his stare, but not out of fear. It was out of arousal. She felt a fire stoked low in her belly and that was a first for her. Sure, she’d been horny before, but this felt different, Something she couldn’t quite describe. He grinned, seeing her squeeze her thighs together, and the road drew his gaze where it should be.

“So soon? C’mon, we’ve known each other for so long.” He said and Georgia straightened up, leaning closer to him over the center console. Her eyes flicked to the back seat, noticing one of the puppies shifting position to get more comfortable. Boone was still very much down for the count.

“Tyler we really haven’t.” She said, tilting her head, her gaze piercing, but he was largely unfazed. 

“Look, Gee, what we had before, it all just felt right and now we’re back together and it just feels like that again. At least to me, it does.” His voice became unsteady. His breath quickened, panic filling his chest. She thought for a moment and then responded.

“This doesn’t feel like that to me, Tyler.” She said and he glanced over, a solemn expression, before she spoke again. “This is so much better.”

Tyler smiled and his expression softened. He wanted to stop the truck and jump over the center console and make out with her, but they weren’t too far from Little Rock, where they’d be dropping Boone off so he had to reel in his feelings for a little while longer. 

��️ ⛈️ 🌪️

When they arrived in Little Rock, Tyler had to shake Boone and let the puppies crawl on him to get him to wake up. He awoke to puppy kisses and Tyler yelling, “Boone getchur ass outta my truck!” Boone yawned and stretched, then hopped out of the truck. Tyler helped the puppies down so that they could go to the bathroom before they headed back out on the road. They’d stopped at a gas station with a restaurant so Georgia headed to the bathroom as well. She hugged Boone before she did that and let him and Tyler say their goodbyes as well. Their plan was to have Boone meet them back in Stillwater at Georgia’s house. They had to be there in about a week to take care of her horses while her sister headed out to a horse show. 

When Georgia exited the bathroom, she took a quick stroll through the gas station shelves and noticed a couple of pregnancy tests. She thought about grabbing one, but she decided not to. She wanted to know of course, but she also didn’t want to know at the same time. She knew Tyler wanted this to happen more than anything, but Georgia was still feeling like she was in limbo. It felt like she was waiting for something to happen to give her a greater purpose. She felt empty since leaving the rodeo circuit and while the thrill of chasing a tornado down a back road was exciting, it just hadn't hit the spot like rodeo had. Then again, she had an empty feeling inside her chest since she left Tyler, so maybe it wasn’t even the rodeo. Maybe it was Tyler. It didn’t matter what that greater purpose was though, as long as she was with Tyler while trying to achieve it.

Once they were all settled back in the truck, Georgia felt sleepy. She didn’t understand why, as soon as she got in his truck, she could just fall asleep so easily. Maybe it was how comfortable the bucket leather seats were, or maybe it was the smell of his cologne that always lingered faintly in the cab, or maybe it was the low rumble of the Cummins diesel as he drove. Maybe it was the way he drove, so steady and calm, but only when he wasn’t chasing a tornado. Whatever the reason, Tyler noticed and he reached over to place a hand on her thighs and rub for a few moments before speaking. 

“Hey, there's one more stop I wanna make before we get to my parents' house, if that's okay?” His voice was low and quiet and Georgia nodded, then drifted off to a dreamless sleep once again. She awoke easily when she felt the truck roll to a stop. She opened her eyes and gazed out over a beautiful view of the setting sun. Tyler had stepped out and come around to her side and opened the door. “C'mon, wanna show you somethin’.”

Georgia took his hand and he helped her out of the truck. He kept a hold of her hand and led her a few minutes of a walk to a spot overlooking a river and a wide expanse of trees. He'd locked the truck with the still sleeping pups inside.

“Over to the west is where my parents live, to the east a ways is where Jake and I used to go muddin’ and do other stupid shit with our trucks as teenagers, and then right about through the middle here leads directly to the center of my hometown. We're standing on Dardanelle Rock right now and there's an old Native American story about a Cherokee by the name of Dardanelle, who waited for his lover, a Choctaw woman named Leonietta. They were gonna meet and run away together but when she didn't show after he waited for days, he figured she wasn't comin’ so instead of live another day without her, he jumped to his death. So the rock was named after him.” Tyler explained and Georgia’s brows furrowed as he took her hands in his.

‘That's sad.” She said and he nodded, as he gazed down into her pretty blue eyes. "It's always been a spot for lovers to meet though." She held his stare as he took her waist in one hand and one of her hands in his other. She placed her other hand on his bicep and he pulled her close. He paused for a moment, reaching for his phone. He pressed play and put it in his back pocket, turning the volume up just enough so they could hear the beginning guitar chords to “Wind Up Missin’ You” by Tucker Wetmore. Tyler took the lead and guided her into a steady rhythm as the words flowed through his phone speaker and over the soft rustle of the leaves that were just beginning to get some color other than green.

I know I might look like another ballcap on a barstool underneath a PBR light, saying everything under the moon to get you in my arms tonight. 

Georgia’s eyes locked on Tyler's, and she tilted her head with an easy smile as she allowed him to set the pace. This was one of her favorite things about Tyler. Sometimes, when he didn't feel like using his words, he would just pull her into his arms and dance, always taking the initiative. 

You probably heard it all a thousand times but it ain't what it looks like. Girl let me tell you what it looks like. 

Tyler never had a problem articulating what he was feeling, except in the case of Georgia. The words would get stuck in his throat and he couldn't bring himself to say exactly what he was feeling because it would turn into a five minute monologue. He could pour his heart out for her and it still never felt like he could express exactly how much he loved her.

And you look like waves on a sunset, and you can crash on me all night, and you look like wine on a truck bed, and a little what I'm doin’ for the rest of my life.

He could bare his soul and that still wouldn't express his feelings in those moments, when he felt so much love pass between them. He placed her hand across his heart, his much larger one covering hers, and touched his forehead to hers as he continued swaying back and forth, letting the song say everything for him. 

You look like I'm done lookin’, but girl the hard truth is, if this night don't turn into two, you look like I'm gonna wind up missin’ you.

In those moments, Georgia knew to listen, to let the words and the music soak in. To let it wash over her and try to absorb what Tyler was trying to show her.

I've gotta tell you baby, I've been the kinda boy your daddy never wanted you to go and fall in love with. The kind of boys you're probably done with their dumb shit, yeah.

Georgia felt tears sting her eyes at the thought of her father, and how Tyler would never get to meet him. Sure, maybe Tyler was a bit of a bad boy, but Georgia felt like that line might be wrong. Tyler was exactly the type of man her father would've wanted her to be with.

I bet you've heard the stories, can't say I'm proud of that, but I've turned the page on the old me and now I ain't lookin’ back cause

Tyler noticed a tear roll down her cheek and he reached up to wipe it away before stopping their little dance. He leaned down and kissed her as the chorus flowed to their ears again. 

You look like waves on a sunset and you can crash on me all night, and you look like wine on a truck bed, and little what I'm doin’ for the rest of my life. 

When they parted, the sage green of Tyler's eyes had softened to catch her brilliant blue in the fading sunlight. She placed her head against his chest and listened to his heart beat, and he sang along softly. Another thing she loved about him was when he sang to her, because he thought he was a bad singer when he actually wasn't.

You look like I'm done lookin’ but girl the hard truth is, is this night don't turn into two, you look like I'm gonna wind up missin’ you.

She felt the words rumble in his chest as he spoke, one of the most comforting feelings in the world that she'd never get enough of. 

“I know nothin’ is guaranteed, and I know that what we've been through so far has been fuckin’ insane, but if you can make me one promise, Gee, no matter how hard things get...don't ever leave me again...’cause I don't ever wanna miss you again. I don't ever wanna be on this earth without you again. I can handle a lot, but that's the one damn thing I just can't handle. I can't ever miss you again.” Tyler explained and Georgia heard unsteadiness in his voice. She heard the cracking of his composure. She heard the brave and unshakeable Tyler Owens, rattled to his core with the thought of her ever leaving again and that was when it really hit Georgia what she had done. Of course he had forgiven her because that's the kind of man he was, but in that moment Georgia vowed she would do whatever she could to love Tyler and never leave him, ever again. She'd built a fear in him and it was her job, no one else's, to rebuild trust. Like a naughty colt who'd had a difficult go of things, Georgia still had to convince him that everything would be okay. 

“I don't ever wanna miss you again either, Ty. I feel too empty without you...too incomplete.” She whimpered, moving to touch her lips to his. “I swear to God, Tyler Owens, I can't ever be without you again either.”

[chongmiz]

I heard I can fo it with a broken heart on the radio

And aside from the chorus being kinda awkward (I'm so depressed I act like it my birTHHHdaayyyyyYY)

I think this whole 'i sold you a lie you think I'm doing well but I'm not but I'm killing it so I'm a #girlboss try come for my job' is so embarassing

Because everything shes done over this last year I've thought 'theres a woman doing real bad'

Like I'm not trying to dispute the effort and energy that goes into touring like she does, but a lot of her decisions both professional and personally have made me think uh oh

Its giving 'could a depressed person do this?' But it's about dating the worst men on the planet and looking like shes going to cry on stage half the time

💌 come talk to me, a veteran swiftie in the anti- tag in the same way that martin luther still thought himself catholic

where i land with it lyrically is in conversation with four songs: "mirrorball" from folklore, "nothing new" from red TV, and two other ttpd tracks, "who's afraid of little old me" and "clara bow"

per the long pond sessions, she wrote "mirrorball" partially about COVID's effect on touring ("and they called off the circus, burned the disco down / when they sent home the horses and the rodeo clowns"). pair that with the much discussed WAOLOM asylum line and... it might be because she says "circus," it might be that while i have no personal experience of involuntary hospitalization i Do have basic empathy, but i think of the two great blond celebrity memoirs of the last few years: britney spears' the woman in me and jeannette mccurdy's i'm glad my mom died. which is all to say, she doesn't Have to do it with a broken heart! actually! "the asylum where they raised me" sounds like her pursuit of fame was coerced by say, a stage mom or an abusive contract or monetary need (it wasn't), if she was in an urgent health crisis like ICDIWABH suggests ("even when you wanna die"), she has all the power to postpone or cancel dates. she's not in a conservatorship, she's not being Made to tour; i can imagine feeling obligated to pay the hundreds of people it employs, but she is an actual billionaire, i think she can afford blue cross blue shield PPO plans for a militia. you can interpret "all the pieces of me shattered while the crowd was chanting 'more!'" as resenting the audience, but there's other performers in smaller venues with less freedom and power who need to be onstage to afford food. idk.

then there's the "try and come for my job:" extremely vague as to who is coming for it, and the popular reading is of other pop stars on tour. "clara bow" is my favorite track on ttpd by a long shot in part because it feels like a more mature version of "nothing new;" it's a little kinder to the ingenue and seems to respect her predecessors, recognize that She was the ingenue once, but it does not match up to her actual conduct in public. this is where i become very asian, but besides her being uhhh... pretty drunk at the grammys this year, i think her behavior is more a symptom of white american culture as egoistic and ahistorical—this is the kamala harris "you think you fell out of a coconut tree" meme, yes, but more broadly my complaint is filial piety. acting up in front of the likes of celine dion and tracy chapman and joni mitchell, especially on a night that celebrates all three of them, is absolutely unacceptable to me. they're your elders, they paved the path you're on (nothing new: "she'll know the way, and then she'll say she got the map from me"), but her teenage fans who've never heard any other music don't know or accept that she Isn't actually the progenitor of acclaimed women singer-songwriters

she wants to be seen as a "cool big sister" mentor to younger pop girls or boosting indie acts like boygenius, but afaik she herself hasn't shared the stage with an older female musician since alanis morrissette as a surprise guest on the 1989 tour. sure, she showed up to induct carole king to the rock 'n roll hall of fame, with a solo stage. but as much as people first cringed at luke combs' "fast car" cover, he acquitted himself with his grammy performance. there is true reverence there. if taylor brings stevie nicks (who wrote a poem?? for the ttpd physical editions) onstage at some point soon, i'll Maybe start to believe she doesn't see women over 40 as piles of dust she's either embarrassed to stand near Or, you know, who expose that she did not in fact fall out of a coconut tree, and have more stage presence sitting down than she does in sequins

[mysticstarlightduck]

Incorrect Quotes Tag!

Tagged by the very cool, @rickie-the-storyteller! Find her post here!

This is the link to the generator.

Since the last time I did this, I used my characters from The Last Wrath, this time, I did this tag for my main cast of Tales of Wilted Flowers!

It is mostly platonic, the only ships here are: Rylisan/Eiralis, and Xarian/Lorelai.

Micah, Caladin, Arista, and Neoma'ka are their friends and adventuring companions. Kaellel is Eiralis' estranged older brother and Niven is one of Rylisan's many siblings.

Xarian: Is something burning? 

Lorelai (leaning seductively on the counter): Just my desire for you. 

Xarian: Lorelai, the toaster is literally on fire.

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Kaellel (flying down to camp like nothing’s wrong in the world): Sorry I'm late, I was doing stuff.

Rylisan: YOU PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!

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Eiralis to Rylisan: Turn that frown upside-down!

*a little while later*

Eiralis: What are you doing?

Rylisan, trying to do a handstand: You told me to “turn that frown upside-down” but it is not working.

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Xarian: I'm going to ask you to be respectful.

Caladin: I will politely decline.

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Rylisan: Did you just refer to a knife as a “people-opener”?

Arista (a dhampir with issues): …

Arista: …Should I not have?

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Neoma’ka: While you were caught up in your heterosexuality, I studied the way of the blade!

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Lorelai: Do you have a self-care routine?

Kaellel: "Keep going bitch,” said to myself in different accents.

Eiralis, coming into the room: Kaellel, no.

-------

Rylisan, stoically amused: Do you need help getting up?

Caladin, after a drunken brawl: Nah, I'm cool down here on the floor.

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Eiralis: Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way.

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Xarian, incredulous:... You’re giving me a sticker?

Lorelai: Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying “me-wow!”

Xarian: … 

Xarian: I’m not a preschooler.

Lorelai: Fine, I’ll take it back-

Xarian: I earned this, back off!

-------

Kaellel, eyeing Rylisan with a death glare: It’s not that I don’t trust Eiralis, I just... don’t trust my sister's impulse control. Especially when it comes to you.

-------

Eiralis: *eating a cinnamon roll*

Rylisan, feigning shock: Cannibalism.

Eiralis: *confused chewing noises*

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Micah: Now, if I may speak for good-looking people everywhere...

Kaellel, walks past: Only as their rodeo clown.

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Lorelai: Neoma’ka, no.

Neoma’ka, cracking her knuckles, walking towards a fight: Neoma’ka, yes.

--------

Lorelai: Why do humans have different blood groups?

Caladin, looking at Arista: So mosquitoes can enjoy different flavors.

Arista: *vampiric hiss*

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Rylisan: What can therapy do for me that screaming for 30 minutes can’t?

Niven: I have several questions... Namely why are you like this?

-------

Micah: Maybe the true treasure was friendship all along. But I hope not, because I can’t spend my friendship on new clothes.

-------

Rylisan: You're violent.

Arista: Yeah but I'm also short and that's adorable.

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Caladin: I was arrested for being too cool.

Xarian: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.

--------

Xarian: Isn’t it a bit dangerous?

Lorelai: Xarian, please. We’ve been in a lot of unexpected predicaments before and we always escape unhurt.

Xarian: …

Lorelai: Okay, we sometimes escape unhurt.

Xarian, narrows his eyes: ...

Lorelai: Alright, we escaped unhurt once... Then we hurt ourselves on the way home.

---------

Rylisan: Do we have any orange juice left?

Kaellel: *pours the remaining juice into their cup without breaking eye contact*

Kaellel: Sorry, we’re all out.

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Xarian: What is the most illegal thing you can do with one gold?

Neoma’ka: Exchange it for a hundred copper, put them all in a sock, and then beat someone to death with it.

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Rylisan: Niven, I screwed up, big time.

Niven (downing a glass of wine, done with life): Brother dearest, given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific.

---------

Arista: Now it's time for some witty back and forth banter. You go first.

Caladin: *sobbing*

Arista: Look, my dude, I'm not sure where to go with that.

---------

Lorelai: That was so hot, Xarian.

Xarian: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets.

Lorelai: I'm so in love with you.

---------

Kaellel: You know, Micah, you are the sun in my life.

Micah: Why? Cause I'm smoking hot?

Kaellel: Because it hurts my eyes looking at you. LEAVE MY HOUSE-

---------

Neoma’ka: What do you do for a living?

Rylisan: I exist against my will.

---------

Eiralis: Hey, Rylisan, do you have any hobbies?

Rylisan: Swimming..

Eiralis: Really? That’s cool. I never expected you to-

Rylisan: In a pool of self-hatred and regret.

---------

Micah: As a responsible adult-

Caladin: *chuckles*

Micah:… As a responsible adult—

----------

Lorelai: Wow, that was quick thinking on that phony sacrifice stuff.

Xarian: Oh, that was all real.

Rylisan (interrupts): Wait, you were trying to help them kill us?!

Xarian: Well, If I’m gonna be sacrificed, I’m gonna do it right!

Lorelai:... He has a point.

---------

Tagging: @writernopal, @tabswrites, @cabbojage, @clairelsonao3 and @liv-is.

[orphancookie69]

10/2024: City of Industry Rodeo!

After going to my first Rodeo, my sister "dragged" me to a local one and I was hee haw ready to go! Boots, check. Fringe, check. Cowboy hat, check. LETS GO.

This is my second rodeo, my first one was in Lake Havasu City, AZ. This is a much smaller one but it had a hell of a crew. The local talent was also amazing! Super clean event. It was a covered arena too!

There were protesters there, of course its California right? And really, we as Americans have the right to protest. But man, if you stood around long enough to listen to them they were just being rude. Like, we truly are in a time of too much prosperity if people can be rude in the name of "exercising their American rights" and not need to have to work to pay their bills.

There was a small amount of vendors for food and shirts but good prices and cash. Good quality to food and shirts. We took too long to get a seat but we were outside as the national anthem was sung, and the crowd carried most of the song. It gives me hope for America.

There was a lot local people participating in the events. We have some amazing talent in this great state. The crew running it was really good. I loved the rodeo clown, and the host was on a horse right where all the action was happening. There was a lot of families and really young children there.

I was a little shocked, and really only in California, but there was a gentlemans club that sent their "workers" to the rodeo in branded skimpy clothes. This was a family friendly event, there is no way they could of been a sponsor so to pull that was really messed up. I think they got in trouble as some of them ended up changing.

Here is the link for more information: Industry Hills Charity Pro Rodeo (industryhillsrodeo.org)

I loved it and really can't wait for the next one. I really want to go to rodeos in other states to see what personality the other places give the event! This event sold out before it could even take place, did you go? Would you go next time?

[andfasterthings]

📄

📄What’s a WIP you never finished that you would like to go back and revisit?

for tkpat, i've gotten to a place where i've kind of cannibalized a lot of my backburner/graveyard wips in one way or another. if not stealing the trope(s) than it's the genre or concepts.

but the two that i'd most like to revisit if i ever could are the true blood fusion fic i mentioned earlier and the rodeo au.

rodeo au is one where pat is part of this, like, rodeo royalty family. his grandpa did it. his dad did it. his mom did it. his sisters do it. he does it. he doesn't really love it. but it's... legacy. it's what he's always done. and he's good at it. then here comes this hotshot upstart former rodeo clown dickhead (tk) who is good at it, though unpolished and unrefined—and worst of all—he loves it. very clearly loves the rodeo in a way pat doesn't anymore (if he ever did). i was thinking of making it a duel timeline fic. then and now. then being the summer they met on the circuit, having this semi-forbidden rivals-with-benefits thing going on, where tk is very clearly into pat and pat is "ok fellow associate" about it. now being when tk shows up at the patrick family horse ranch to work—and to win pat's heart.

anyway. won't ever get around to it but... i think about it a lot.

[andromedia5]

this is a rant proceed w caution

ok so I think what drives me so crazy about people being like “omg Dick Grayson is such a mirrorball!!!” is not that I’ve always associated it with Donna since its one of the songs on folklore that corresponds to Betty and . . . you know

but for me its really like such a mirrorball experience that Donna literally IS the older sister complex and yet people hear a song about that and are like “YES! WOW!! YOU KNOW WHO THIS REMINDS ME OF?” and then point to the man standing next to her

like no Dick doesn’t have an older sister complex. one he’s literally not a sister and I am making it about gender cause girls are expected to do more younger, its just a fact, and two, HE LITERALLY DOESNT HAVE ONE

my man was like not involved at all until Tim (which is fine, im not hating on him for that im just saying), even then he was sorta just in it to fall of trains upon hearing about his gf being pregnant 

and anything people cite as evidence to the contrary is always drumroll please something from dc’s crusade to give Dick any and all of Roy’s interesting relationship dynamics and character traits

and when the part of the song that people are freaking the fuck out about is when she (Taylor) mentions a circus . . . but the situation she's describing is so much more donna than it is Dick

like hear me out

And they called off the circus, burned the disco done 

Hayleys post the Graysons’ death

When they sent home the horses and the rodeo clowns

Dick’s childhood being essentially over   

 I'm still on that tightrope  

Donna forcing herself to do something she isn’t prepared or capable of doing (because she, Dick was a literal baby) and carrying literally everyone’s emotional baggage while having plenty of her own 

I'm still trying everything to get you laughing at me                                             

throughout their entire childhood being the one constant source of joy and quasi-normalcy 

the rest of the song is also very her (I’ve never been a natural the fucking purple laser thingy) but yeah that's my spiel, goodnight new york

[thedevilsdom]

just a cowboy and his dog!!

[fel-ix665]

Yeah, I also forgot these to add to the WIPs but here...

The first one is from a DTIYS on instagram for an artist who is making their own video game based on Alice in Wonderland.

Next, my sister wanted to draw her as a rodeo clown but I didn't like how it turned out so I left it til recently.

[stephspurs]

A Family Affair | Euro 2020 Football Fanfiction

Life is beautiful and life is cruel. A window into the souls of the victorious and the vanquished. In a way, football did come home during the summer of 2021. Follow along Amelia’s journey, navigating the football world as a tactical analyst for the italian football team, with a brother and father part of the three lions. Will Amelia leave Italy and come back to England? Will she leave the Serie A for the Prem? Will she set aside the bianconeri stripes for new colours, leaving behind friendship for love? Maybe she can have both...

EEEEEEK here's part two!!! Part two sees more of Amelia's beautiful brain, the love she has for her team, and her brother, & her friendship with Kyle Walker. Hope you guys love it as much as i do - please let me know what you think - i'd love to hear from you all!

Love always,

Steph xx

UPDATE as of 31/07: I've made some additional editing changes due to some feedback about the confusion between ben white (her brother) and ben chilwell (not her brother LOL). Nothing has been added to the story, just the addition of either surname has been added where i think it could be more straightforward - for future readers!

Part 2. | seconda parte

warnings; none - just a whole lot of feels.

word count; 1469

writing tools; third person until dashed line, first person thereafter.

next update; Wednesday 28/07 5pm AEST. Updates are twice weekly (Sunday & Wednesday)!

Tags (as requested by users); @footballffbarbiex

link to fic masterlist here

11 July 2021 | The Final Match.

The players for both national teams lined up side by side down the tunnel. Chiellini & Kane, both confident in their teams ability, captaining with great authority and mentorship for the ten men stood behind them. Amelia stood at the back of the tunnel, watching the scene ahead of her. Her dad, walking up the centre aisle between the two teams, shaking the hands of his players, confident in his preparation. A gentle hand to her brother's shoulder, saying everything it needs to say. It was the same hand that rubbed the back of her neck as he walked past, communicating the same thing. Go your hardest, you’re ready for this.

It was her turn, she started at the back of the line, and in true Italian style, a kiss was placed to both cheeks of every player up the line. When she reached Jorginho, a player she came to appreciate for his technical mindset and intellectual approach to the game, she kissed his cheek and turned to the player opposite him - her brother, who was trying his hardest to face forward and pay his little sister no mind. She knew what he was doing, but she wasn’t as heartless as the rest of the England squad probably perceived her to be. Reaching out, she rubbed her hand along the back of his neck, just as her father did to her, leaned in and pressed a kiss to his cheek, before continuing down the line of her players to the front. Shaking hands with Gareth Southgate, who no doubt had come to realise who the girl was in relation to his team, and a kiss to both cheeks of Mr Mancini, she walked out and took her place on the bench, ready for the game of her life.

120 minutes of football later.

Life is both beautiful and cruel. Whilst she hadn’t anticipated the early goal from Shaw, Amelia had predicted every play by the english and made sure her team was there waiting for them to turn and run. They knew to never let Harry Kane have the space to move the ball, to make sure Mason Mount was marked at all times and to pay attention to the silky smooth skills of Raheem Sterling. They knew that every player on the english side had the talent and skill to shoot and score, no matter if they're a striker or full back. In the end, the endless taunts from the british crowd and constant reminder of “it’s coming home” only fuelled the Italians further and pushed them harder, to their limits. Eventually both sides met with equal force and completed extra time at a draw, leading to penalties. All of Amelia’s preparation with Gianluigi Donnarumma would present itself now. She went over the preferred sides of the penalty takers she presumed would be stepping up for their country, and reminded him of all he has achieved & what there is still left to be done. After all, they are the masters of their own fate.

Donnarumma’s block of Bukayo Saka’s penalty rattled her bones and sent a chill down her spine. They had done it. The boys had finally brought football back to Rome for the first time since 1968, and while she can’t take all of the credit, she knows she single handedly played a part in this victory. As soon as happiness filled her body, guilt and sadness flooded her heart. She had been part of the problem that caused her brother so much pain. Her dad knew how to handle rejection, this wasn't his first rodeo, and could see with an open mind just how they had managed to achieve greatness. But her brother had truly believed they had it, that football was coming home to England.

After being surrounded by her boys, cheering and hugging her, screaming in relief that they had done it, Amelia took a step back and took a deep breath in. Looking over to the players in white consoling each other with looks of understanding and pats on the back, hugging those with the unfortunate fate of missing their penalties, she found her brother.

_____________________________________________________________

Squatting down with his elbows resting on his knees and hands covering part of his face, his eyes showing disbelief that the moment had escaped them. Jordan Henderson, the figurative big brother to my big brother, leaning down whispering what one can only assume is words of encouragement and strength to him. A voice to my right startles me, not because I wasn't used to the noise, but because it was a voice I haven't heard directed at me with anything other than venom in a very long time.

“He wants you to be there for him, don’t ever think for a second that he doesn’t want you around.” Kyle Walker speaks into the open, whilst looking around at the fans still in the stadium. The fans behind us right now would be watching with speculation, wondering why the english player is talking to an italian so soon after defeat.

“I don’t think he doesn’t want me around, i just don’t think he wants me around right now” I spoke back, trying to reason with myself and Kyle as to why i haven't gone up and offered my condolences to my brother.

“I think the only thing that can pull him out of this is you. He was beating himself up last night after your argument, and while he turned it into motivation for today, it's still weighing on his conscience. He’s happy for you, we aren't that mean so as to deny him the pleasure of being proud of his little sister...even if she is working for the enemy”

“You’ve always been one to be the voice of reason, whilst still being the clown I grew up to know and love”

“Does this mean we’re friends again? I’m sorry about last night” Kyle admitted.

“Last night wasn’t what ended our friendship...we stopped being friends the day you left Spurs.” I joked back to Kyle. I turned to look at his over-expressed shocked face and walked backwards a few steps while giggling, before turning and sauntering over to my brother who was now surrounded by some more teammates. Upon seeing me and noticing my solemn expression, finding comfort in the fact that I wasn't there to rub my win in their faces, the boys left my brother to himself.

I stood there, staring into the eyes of my brother, who after a few minutes reached out and pulled me into him as though I was a life raft and he was stranded in the ocean. We stood there, hugging, saying everything we needed to say through the way we were gripping to the backs of each other's team colours.

“I am so proud of you, you put up one hell of a fight Ben. Certainly made my job harder” I spoke into his shirt. He was the taller of the two, but I wasn't that short. Almost immediately after, I felt him push more weight onto me and sink a bit lower so he was in my neck, shedding a few tears he didn't want seen by those around us. Not even 5 seconds later, he stood up straight, wiping his eyes and offering me a smile.

“God, I wish you weren’t better at your job than I am at mine” he joked back to me. I smiled up at him, shaking my head.

“I would say you’re wrong but the medal that's about to be around my neck would say otherwise” i joke back with him. I was not about to dull my sparkle for someone else's sun to shine, whether he is my brother or not.

“We have to talk about everything that went down last night but i’ll let you enjoy your night with your team” Ben says as we turn and begin to walk toward the stage being set up for the ceremony.

“Thanks Ben, family dinner on Sunday? Tell your friends to come, you and i both know mum will have enough food to feed everyone without even trying”

“Of course, I'll put it in the lads chat & see who’s still around. Kyle will see it in our family chat - who even put him in there anyway!?”

“Honestly...I think it was mum. You know she loves her son, Kyle.”

As I walk back to my team, and into the arms of Fede and Jorginho who wrap me up in an Italian flag and start jumping around, I can't help but smile and laugh at my amazing life. Who knows what the future has to hold, but for tonight, the azzurri are the champions of europe and the trophy is coming home, to Rome.

Part 3. | parte terza

[thatgenderfluidiot]

I went to a my first rodeo today. One of the biggest ones in my state, maybe the biggest. I knew everyone there would be redneck, homophobic, anti-vax, etc, but I thought that the rodeo itself wouldn’t have a political agenda??? Well I was very wrong, it was much more than just people racing horses. Here were some of the not-so good highlights:

1. When the intro was all about how “we’re gonna be patriotic and say politically incorrect things and leave if you’re offended” and I immediately knew it was going to be full of conservative nonsense

2. When they went on a big rant about “America is the best and most respected country and the most free because on Sunday you can go to any church you want”

3. When they had a big Christian prayer before it started (honestly it was kind funny tho)

4. When they were like “please stand and put you’re hand on your heart for the most BeAuTiFuL song in the world: our National Anthem”

5. When the rodeo clown made the joke “I’m s fat guy who identifies as a skinny guy, guess you could say I’m transSLENDER” while the whole crowd roared with laughter while me, my sister, and my sister’s trans friend just sat there like 👁👄👁

6. When I made the mistake of wearing my converse with pride flag beads on the laces AND was the only one at the whole event wearing a mask (there were probably thousands of people)

7. When my sister, her friend and I were the only visibly queer/non-redneck/non-republicans there 😬

8. When they causally dropped a joke about the January 6th capitol raid

9.Also calf roping/wrangling??? Why is it a thing? I’m pretty sure it should be considered animal abuse and it was really hard to watch

[birdlimes]

Attack for my sister @dinosaorwithwings of her rodeo clown magical girl, Dixie!!

[its--fandom--darling]

Headcanons that I have about FLW!Sy

to kick off my 800 follower celebration, here are a few things that I know about my version of Sy to be true. please feel free to send any questions about either Famous Last Words!Sy or The Specter!August and I’ll answer them as long as they don’t spoil the plot of the story. 

(gif by mrcavill)

 1. He was super gangly and sensitive growing up, his sister was the popular one but once he hit his growth spurt in highschool and started playing baseball he become more popular. Still very socially awkward.

2. He and Willa were raised by a single mom. Hence him drinking his respect women juice all day, every day.

3. On his first deployment, he picked up smoking. He came home and Willa tore him a new one. He quit that month.

4. He is fiercely over protective of his mom and sister.

5. Studied karate as a kid, but it was short lived. He was an orange belt.

6. When he was 11, he wanted to be a rodeo clown. He doesn’t like to talk about, Willa brings it up whenever she can. All because his uncle took him to the PBR tour.

7. Willa used to pay him to do her math homework, because he was freaky good at it and took AP math all through high school.

8. Graduated in the top 20 of his class out of 600 kids.

9. Joined the Army because of his Uncle James Syverson. He was their father figure and Sy adored him.

10. Has a massive sweet tooth, which Willa loves to exploit and which is part of the reason Sy works out as hard as he does.

Tagging:

@littlefreya @persephone-is-here-omg @radaofrivia @littlewrenofrivia @salimahbicharara-comun @nuggsmum @kmuir1 @gearhead66 @poledancingdinos @geralt-of-baevia @iloveyouyen @connieisland @henrythickcavill @hoeforhenry @hope-to-hell @inlovewithhisblueeyes @cavillsharman @cavillryarchive @cavillsbestgal @cavilladdict @devterra @eldarwen333 @raspberrydreamclouds @lookinsidemyhead @avantgardium-leviosa @palaiasaurus64 @fuckoffbard @foodieforthoughts @oddsnendsfanfics @ohmygoodie @oh-for-fic-sake @hell1129-blog @angryschnauzer @viking-raider @wendimydarling @x-abi-sharp-x @whatbecameofsubtlety @brandycranby @khadineberry @winchestersister55 @winchwm @achaoticaugust @mindingmyownbusiness @frostsoldier @beck07990 @asylummara @summersong69 @wolvesandhoundshowltogether @killjoy-assbutt-1112 @wheretheriversrunintothesea @trinitylovexox @mary-ann84 @thelastsock​ @the-soot-sprite​ @maizyistrash​ @omgkatinka​ @hail-horror-queen​ 

[kathyprior4200]

Welcome to Wacky Wally Wackford’s World!

Greetings, I say, greetings demons of all ages! The name’s Wally Wackford, an oh so suave man of business! You may not know me, but surely you’ve seen me…pretty much everywhere. Yes, I’ve never been the type to stay in one place for long. Life can be pretty wild at times. But that’s what makes it oh so fun!

 So what’s my story, you say, you say? Well look no further, ‘cause I have a tale to tell.

 I’ve been doing freelance work off and on, laboring at one job, moving onto the next. The jobs vary a lot, but I’m a Wally of many trades. (Yes, I’ve been fired many times as well, figuratively and literally…it is Hell after all.) Early on, I found out that living in poverty is never a lot of fun. I quickly learned how to scam other people…and boy did I enjoy it! It was the only way I could inch toward the top, get some power of my own. I’d make a few deals here and there and then when clients got desperate, I’d say something like, “Oh I’m so sorry but there’s an extra fee you have to pay. Forgot to mention that.” Then I’d point to that small scribbled section on the contract I added in moments ago.

 “I’m starving, sir!” they’d say. Or, “I left my money at home,” or my favorite: “Shove it up your trickster rear!”

 Sometimes they did pay me extra. Other times they didn’t…and those were the ones who soon forgot about everything forever. (chuckles).

 Anyway, moving on.

 Sometimes when my days got long and hard, I’d go to saloons for a nice bottled drink. The emerald colored Greed Mead is my favorite. Twirling my thin black mustache, I’d wink at some pretty imp gals nearby and say, “Hey there. You’ve been in Hell for a long time. Is that why you’re so hot?”

 Most of the time, I’d get a swift punch to the face in response. The glares on their pretty faces, “Take that remark to the Sloth Ring, lazy bootleg fucker.”

 So many aggressive people these days. I could tip my black hat to many imps and they’d either fall to my charms or roll their eyes. I was fine with that. There’s not much else to do in Hell then to live your life and amuse yourself with watching others struggle. In fact, pretty much every sin is encouraged, so why not keep going?

 After stalking around looking for more people to scam, I came across Loo-Loo Land in the Ring of Greed. I’ve always loved that place, its vibrant atmosphere emitting joyful fun and chaotic flair. I walked on over and asked the vendor, “I say, you have any jobs here?”

 “I’ve heard of you, Wacky Wally,” he said at the ticket stand. “You may be a good pick-pocket, but your skills are nothing compared to Mammon. In fact, this whole place is a fucking rip-off of Lucifer’s Lu-Lu Land!”

 “All the more reason to love this place!” I exclaimed.

 “Robo Fizz is putting on another show at 7pm tomorrow,” said the beefy imp vendor. “Made in Mammon’s factory and modeled after the famous imp Fizzarolli.” He then spoke in a low whisper, “It includes some behind the scenes moments for the VIPs…you know, with tentacles and ‘special features.’”

 “Oh that sounds delicious!” I said with a slow grin. “It’d be great to see how his…mechanics work someday…”

 The imp vendor rolled his eyes and flinched at my lighthearted comment. Always know what to say to get that grimace reaction.

 “Anyway,” said the vendor, “We’re running low on staff, so you can go sell those torches over there.”

 The imp pointed to a pink cart with Mammon’s jester face on it. I shrugged and got to work.

 I happily rolled my cart around, selling torches wherever I went. I could honestly stare into those mesmerizing green flames all day.

 “Torches here!” I drawled in my Foghorn Leghorn southern accent. “66% off when you buy four! Parties, decoration, destruction and more!”

 One time on my break, I got to talk to Robo Fizz about money, shows, sex and chaos. We even cracked some jokes together. The robot seemed a little nervous in my presence but then again, he was very unpredictable on a daily basis.

 “A duck, a frog, a demon and a skunk go into a bar. The bartender told them that the drinks were one dollar each. How did they pay for them? Answer: The duck had a bill, the frog had a greenback, the demon had a soul…but the skunk only had a scent!”

 “Hahahaha!” Robo Fizz laughed, sparks flying near him. “Your jokes are much better than Blitzo’s corny puns!”

 “Why thank you,” I replied. “But nothing beats your organ-playing animatronics in your ‘Wonderful World of Evil’ puppet show you did last month.”

 Robo Fizz grinned at the compliment. “You do anything else besides selling torches?”

 “I scam, I kill, I do a little bit of both. Oh and I’m also a great inventor!”

 “How marvelous!” Robo Fizz grinned. “Perhaps if you have enough mayhem in you, you could perform with me at the next Fizzarolli N Friends show!”

 “I say, I’d love that! I’m sure your show will be top notch, copyright be dammed…won’t it?”

 Robo Fizz smiled widely, hiding a strain. “You bet it will!”

 It was during one interesting day when I pushed my cart by a large tent where several Robo Fizz posters were posted. I held up a troch with a hand and called:

 “Torches, I say! I say! Get your inconvenient torches here!”

 Then before I knew it, the robot and a random imp crashed right into the cart.

 “Ow, I say OW!” I cried as the green flames quickly spread around. After getting the flames off me, I ran for the hills out of the burning park. I sat, dejected shortly afterward. So much for that job. Along with figuring out what to do next, I also happened to watch the imp fight off Robo Fizz…and the robot falling into the dragon’s mouth.

 How unfortunate.

 After helping Robo Fizz from the dragon’s insides, (killing said dragon, pulling out said robot, cleaning and making quick repairs), I inched closer to him and said, “You made some new friends, I say.”

 Robo Fizz stood tense with just long wires for his body, a metal skeleton of his previous appearance. “Yes…an old time co-worker of mine. A clown of an imp named Blitzo. He and his sisters were once part of a circus act called “The Amazing Imp Siblings. A bit dowdy if you ask me. ”

 Robo Fizz looked around. “Hahahaha! That was some chaotic fun. But now the park is ruined!”

 “I say, if I were you,” I told him, “I’d do all I could to get this park repaired and back on track. Costs a whole lotta money. The last thing you need is to have your boss disappointed in you.”

 A brief look of fear came on his face. “Oh yes, yes, good idea, Wally.”

 “And your friend…whether you upstage him or what, you’d best be sure Blitzo stays out of trouble. I lost my job and almost my life because of that fight!” My yellow eyes shined in a show of sadness.

 “I-I will not let master Mammon down…not that I have a choice.”

 “Let Asmodeus know what’s up as well.”

 Robo Fizz nodded, spun away and laughed. “Time to find that rodeo clown imp!”

0 0 0

 Later on after leaving Greed, I got a brilliant idea. It was after I saw some old fashioned 1800s snake man in Pride plow down buildings with a metal bulldozer vehicle. That was it! I could start my own business!

 I walked over to 666 News station. “Oh Katie,” I said in my sweetest voice.

 “What is it, scum?” she asked, sitting at a mirror and doing her hair. “Can’t you see I’m preparing for a back to back broadcast right now?”

 “I was considering doing my very own commercial about me exploiting…erm, employing other demons for my new factory.”

 Katie barked out a laugh. “Good luck with that, filthy old man! Now get out of my studio.”

 “Very well,” I said. As quiet as a hell mouse, I snatched a camera with an eye at the center and made my way out the door. The rest of the materials I needed came from a nearby junkyard. (Thankfully I avoided the wrath of some hungry kangaroo parasitic queen demon). I was running out of money fast; with no job around the corner, I figured I’d start my own!

 Even I don’t really know where I got my inventing skills from. Many say it was my natural trait. Others say I learned from other experts in the trade. After all, one of the quickset ways to a man’s wallet is through the latest technology.

 But I, Wally Wackford would not settle for your standard modern devices. No. I preferred to make things…well, wacky.

 In no time at all, I had built myself my own mini studio where I could film my commercial! Now, what to call my company? Hmm…

  The Onceler One In a Lifetime Opportunity? No, not enough Ws.

 Wowing Whimsical Wonderous Wonders? Nah, too many Ws.

 Ah…of course! What is a company if you don’t have your name on it?

0 0 0

“Uh huh, keep going, keep going, keep going!” Blitzo insisted at the I.M.P. office.

 Moxxie switched the channel again. This time, an imp appeared wearing a large black top hat, a white shirt and pants, gray vest, black bow tie and black boots. He held a cane in his hands and he also had a thin curly mustache. A mischievous grin of sharp teeth appeared on his face.

 “I say, I say!” the imp exclaimed, briefly pointing his cane at the camera. “Are you looking to get work making crazy contraptions and goofy gadgets?” “Crazy Contraptions” and “Goofy Gadgets” appeared in bold spiked icons to the imp’s left and right. The imp twirled his cane.

 “Well call me at Wacky Wally Wackford’s Wacky Idea ‘Factory!’”

 He pulled down another screen. The title appeared in bold red, gray and white letters surrounded by pinkish circles reminiscent of classic cartoons. “Factory” appeared in quotations. Wally Wackford appeared again.

 “Where you make the things and I make the money!”

 Wally Wackford then got up closer to the camera with a pleading look. “Please, I’m very desperate!”

 “Bingo!” Blitzo called, shooting and exploding the TV again.

 0 0 0

 It was actually really easy to find where Blitzo was and the new sinner inventors. The killing company of imps had me very curious. If they could start a business, why shouldn’t I? And being in the company of amazing inventors…

 I could almost see the soul dollar bills floating into my hands.

 I snuck up to the building, merged into the floor, eavesdropped on their fascinating conversation…

  0 0 0

Crash!

 A metal plank crashed into the room from above as Moxxie scurried out of the way. Loopty Goopty strolled down the plank. “Blitz!”

 “Loofa!” Blitzo called, saying his name wrong. “We can explain everything. I was…”

 Crash!

 Millie pulled Moxxie out of the way before another metal plank landed in the spot where he would’ve been. From on the floor, Blitzo’s butt was very much in view. Blitzo glanced down at him and remarked, “Oh chill out Moxxie, if you kiss my ass any harder you’ll go right inside me.”

 Moxxie turned beet red in the face and scooted further back. Millie helped him up again.  

 “Thanks for saving me again,” Moxxie said. “I would’ve foamed at the mouth and maybe died again.”

 “Why would you think I would ever ignore you?”

 Moxxie shrugged.

 Just then, the demonic form of a man rolled down the plank. His body was black and spherical, with a mint green head wearing a black bowler hat on top. He had a large bushy light gray mustache and pince-nez goggles with dark red spirals on the lens like Loopty. His grinning teeth resembled piano keys.

 “Lyle Lipton?!” Millie, Moxxie, and Blitzo asked in unison.

 “I don’t understand,” said Millie. “We thought you went to Heaven.”

 Lyle Lipton chuckled. “Heaven?” He rolled toward Loopty Goopty. “You don’t make millions in technological advances in robotics by not experimenting on the poor!” He laughed.

 Loopy Goopty grinned as he unleashed his weapons in front of Lyle Lipton. “Finally! We meet again at last! Now that you’re dead, you have no money to keep from me!”

 “Well, I’m a better inventor than you!” Lyle scoffed. “And I’ll make the most money here first!”

 “Nonsense you no good son of a bitch!”

 “Tie yourself in a knot, loony Loopty!”

 “Roll in your grave, fat shit inventor!”

 “Two robotic inventors?!” called a nearby voice. A steampunk blimp hovered in the air and a well-dressed snake demon appeared from a hole in his ship.

 “Who is that guy?” Lyle Lipton asked.

 “I’m the one and only Sir Pentious!” he declared. Several Egg Bois were steering his ship. The eye on his dark top hat peered at the other sinners in curiosity. “With my dominating machines, I aim to take over all of Pentagram City!” Then he muttered, “The repairs were a fucking nightmare to endure.” He glanced at the leftover cracks and holes on the metal sides of his ship.

 “Oooh!” Loopty exclaimed in admiration. “I’ve only seen such inventions in old time history books. How long have you been here?”

 “Since eighteen eighty eight!”

 “Love the loopy numbers!” Loopty grinned, making three small eights with his contraptions. “I’m Loopty Goopty! Lyle is my could’ve been partner in crime but actually rival!”

 “When you’re rich as me, who needs a dead partner!” Lyle exclaimed.

 “You’re dead too, you know!”

 “Where did you cowardly sinners get here?” Sir Pentious asked.

 “Well we just got here,” Lyle called. “Experimenting on the poor made us millionaires! Just…be careful when messing with anti-aging machines. Made us both old.”

 “A machine that changes one’s age?” Sir Pentious pondered. “That could prove to be ussseful in the future,” he hissed.

 “Oh, you should join us, snake man!” Loopy suggested. “Or me, rather.”

 Sir Pentious briefly glared. “Hmm. While I’m perfectly capable of spreading my constrictive terror on my own…I suppose having some…lackey sidekicks would suffice.”

 “Don’t call us lackeys!” Lyle sneered. “And I’m not working with him!”

 “Maybe if we briefly collaborate as a team…”

 Lyle grumbled in annoyance.

 After a moment, Sir Pentious sighed. “Okay, you may join me, but…”

 He spread out his hood, revealing pink eyes. “Don’t even think about crossssing me.” He pulled his hood back. “Now go gather your contraptions and help me manage those scrambled fucking eggs!”

 A bunch of eggs in top hats and suits rolled out and jumped on the two inventors, who were stunned.

 Loopty then laughed evilly. “Inventors to inventors it is!”

 Just then, I popped out of the ground in the room.

  “Did someone say, I say inventors?! Name’s Wally Wackford, and I am lookin’ for creative new people to exploit! I mean employ.” I twirled my mustache with an evil grin.

 At last, a chance to expand my business of the mass production of robotic Fizzarollis! All of Hell will go crazy when they get a chance to buy all the sex robots, the merchandise, everything...and all to profit ME!

 “Everyone, stop fucking up my walls!” Blitzo yelled. “Moxxie’s gonna have to fix all this shit! Satan’s balls! First we deal with Heaven’s table-scraps, now this?”

 I smiled. “Well I guess you can say, you say, you have a holey operation here, Blitzo!”

 I slapped my knee and laughed at my own joke.

 “Get out,” Blitzo muttered.

 Soon I doubled down on the floor laughing. “Oh! I said, ‘o’!”

 Blitzo yelled, “No, I’m serious, get the fuck out!”

 Everyone in the room looked at Blitzo in shock and surprise.

0 0 0

 And then, that one other time where I helped host the Harvest Moon Festival Pain Games!

 Wally Wackford a.k.a. me…stood on the wooden stage, holding a gray microphone decorated with an eye in the center and small horns on the top. I wore my usual white shirt, vest, white pants and dark boots. I twirled my black cane and tipped my black top hat.

 I spoke dramatically through the microphone.

 “Welcome, I say welcome all to Wrath Ring’s annual Harvest Moon Festival! To kick things up, we have the great prince Stolas-a here to user in this here Pain Games!”

 Stolas took the microphone from me and chuckled in slight embarrassment.

“How kind, Wackford.”

 Stolas then addressed the audience. “Greetings tiny Wrath Ring imps. I hereby welcome you all to another year of celebrating the spoils of your labor that continue to feed the citizens of Hell!”

 A crowd of imps glared at him and several boos were heard. Many of these Wrath imps were impoverished farmers who lived on scraps, meat or good crops if they were lucky. The food they worked so hard to produce was consumed by royalty and those in the other Rings. But the reward for their work was being underfed, underpaid and underappreciated instead. The unbalanced cycle had lasted for generations.

 I, too, stared at Stolas with a glare in my eyes. That rich royal thinks he can parade around, doing whatever he wants. Well unfortunately for him, I have plans of my own. Once he sees what I’m capable of…

 He will know who really rules the roost.

 Stolas obliviously continued. “I’m happy to kick off the start of these games that will challenge the toughest imps to show their skill and dominance.” He did a little wave with his fingers. “Good luck to you all!” He noticed Blitzo in the crowd beside Moxxie and Striker and spoke lower. “Especially that sexy little one there! Yoo-hoo, Blitzy!”

 “Oh fuck me,” Blitzo scowled.

 A gun went off and the games began.

 The first event was the race. Moxxie was instantly trampled by the other racers.

 The second event was the high jump. Striker climbed over the high wooden ramp structure with ease and raced after Blitzo who jumped past him. Moxxie struggled to keep his balanced as he reached the top. He slipped down, trying to use his claws to hold on. He fell with a splash in a small puddle…and was promptly chewed on by a monstrous black and white shark with several red eyes.

 The third event was an event with rope. Striker grinned as he held a tied up Blitzo. Blitzo’s arms, legs and horns were all tied up. Moxxie gulped as a stronger grinning imp tied him up with ease.

 The fourth event was tug of war. The crowd cheered as the two teams pulled hard. Striker, Blitzo and Moxxie were on a team. Moxxie stumbled and fell into nearby water, where the shark attacked him again.

 The fifth event was mud wrestling. Blitzo and Striker grinned as they wrestled each other, Striker getting the upper hand as he held Blitzo down, arms locked. Moxxie was instantly crushed in a football hurdle by a group of imps. As they got off of him, Moxxie sat up. And the shark leaped out of the water and over the fence.

 “Mother fucker!” Moxxie screamed as the shark crushed him. (Moxxie somehow survived all this.)

 I hopped back on stage.

 “I say, I say for the first year ever, we have a tie, for the winner of the Harvest Moon Pain Games!”

 Stolas took the microphone from me again.

 “The winners are…Striker, and my darling Blitzy!” Stolas did a one-legged pose as the crowd cheered.

 “Just say my name right!” Blitzo complained. He muttered “Fucking dick,” as he and Striker walked onto the stage.

0 0 0

After the event, I noticed that I.M.P. and Stolas had left. After sharing an undiscernible look with Striker, we parted ways.

 I soon returned to a special place in Greed, tired but determined. I walked alone down dark hallways, torches burning green flames on either side. I wagged my pointed red tail.

 I pushed open the double doors and came across a marvelous sight.

 Gold. Heaps of it, just shining brightly all around the vast spacious chamber. Gold pillars held up the cavern-like ceiling, a chandelier made of bones and diamonds hung from above. There were chests of necklaces, precious gems, goblets and weapons of every shape and size. Hanging on a far wall, concealed in shadow were angelic weapons…at least half a dozen.

 I stared around in amazement. Even Lucifer would be surprised if he could see this place.

 I raced around and tossed the gold coins into the air. In a craze, I rolled around in a nearby pile of green dollar souls. With a grin, I stood up and stared with pride at the grinning face of the jester printed on there.

 A face confident in his ability to deceive others, pursue wealth and bask in endless entertainment.

 The grinning face was all too familiar…

 …because it was my face.

 Wally Wackford leaned his head back, mouth open in a high pitched shriek as dark magic flickered around him. The imp form fell and morphed into shadow. In the imp’s place, a large black beast with thick fur, razor sharp claws and red eyes decorating the body. The figure stood up on two powerful furry legs and sat comfortably in a giant golden throne that occupied the center of the chamber. Angular jester clothing of red, gold and purple stripes adorned the wolf body. And finally, a large spiked black crown sat atop the dark loopy jester hat with bells at the ends. A white and gold jester face showed sharp white teeth and glowing yellow eyes. Dark clawed hands juggled fresh demon skulls into the air and popped them into his large mouth. He crunched loudly before swallowing every bit.

 My imp disguise was perfect. Literally no one else save for Robo Fizz and a few elites knew who was underneath. And even then, my magic was so powerful it could easily confuse anyone around me.

 Being an imp has its advantages; you can travel anywhere and gather information along the way. You can track imps from a killing company and find out where they’ll likely travel to next. You can affiliate yourself with your own robotic creations, some slave imps and succubi…and then in your own form, work with a fellow Deadly Sin on the next stage.

 A wolf in sheep’s clothing.

 Funny, really. Wally Wackford could easily be a separate being, born into poverty, learning to scam others at an early age and go up from there. I, however, didn’t need to learn anything…deceiving others and attracting material wealth was a natural talent. As was shapeshifting.

 Lucifer might not be happy with me coping his idea of a theme park…but business is business…and in Hell, anything goes.

 That incompetent prince Stolas would be dead soon enough. No more Goetia showoffs to get in the way of my rule and reputation. At least the prince’s wife was rightfully concerned with maintaining tradition that has existed for centuries. Aside from my dear friend Lucifer, I was, and should be, the most powerful being in Hell. I’ll keep exploiting those I choose because money is money.

 Those I.M.P. assassins have no idea who they were dealing with.

 I let out a crazed evil laugh, intermingled with a wolf’s howl. With a single touch of my hand, my nearby scepter turned into gold. I admired its shiny flawless sheen. Asmodeus, Leviathan, Lucifer, Satan, Belphegor, Beelzebub and myself…the Seven Deadly Sins…circus-loving rulers of the Overlords and in charge of maintaining chaotic order in our respective Rings.

  I, Mammon, had much to do.

[ambrial-blog]

The Devil’s Dealings.

Returning home,  soaked to the bone, Blitzo dragged his worn body all the way up to the top of the building where his apartment was located. 

Walking past the shrine of pictures the decorated his walls. Prime examples of relationships he yearned to have. His stomach was empty. His heart ached with a memory he had long since buried. 

The scarlet imp grabbed a loaf of stale bread and a couple of thin blankets.  Shivering, the red devil glanced around. He couldn't afford his heating bill again- he barely paid off rent this week. He would have to raffle through his chest of memories and see what he could sell. 

Blitzo sits half curled in on himself, sifting through his phone, looking at faces from the past.  He gave a pained smile, tracing his face. It was a picture of him and Fizzouolii as children grinning into the camera while Lord Mammon snapped a photo of the charismatic duo.

 Fizzorolli had his arm wrapped around Blitzo's neck, shyly kissing him on the cheek. 

"We'll be together forever BlitzO,  You and I- Loo-Loo-land, will never end! I promise you that nothing will separate us"  Fizzaurolli's childlike voice echoes through his head. 

Blitzo swipes a few pictures before his thumb, still on a faded photograph of his mother with her two children.  Lord Mammon didn't touch on the subject much; all Blitzo knew was that she was terribly sick, and she was just gone.  

And then there was his sister, Barbie-Wire, who outshines him on his best days. 

Blitzo's hand reaches for his mother's choker, which is around his neck. He bites his lip as he traces her face with a finger. Loo-Loo-land, a bitter-sweet place, full of bitter-sweet memories. 

This was pointless. Everyone had made it abundantly clear that the fire imp was a loveless fool.  

What was he thinking building a career off of stupid, silly little dreams?  Moxie and Millie only put up with his ass because he was the boss. And Loony, she hated his guts. 

He was alone. Always alone. 

Maybe it was time to find something new, something exciting. Leave IMP to Moxie and Millie and move on with his life. 

There had to be somewhere. No one has heard of BlitzO, the Rodeo- clown, and if they did, no one would really care. 

As Night slowly crept on and Blitz succumbed to fretful slumber, clutching tightly onto memories of the past. 

A shadow creps by the open windows. A tall figure, long and slender, slithers through the apartment. Sickly yellow eyes pierce through the veil of shadows.  Take notice of the memorial and the many scratched-out photographs of Blitzo's face. 

"Your more pathetic than I thought, Bossman, hisses the snake.  Quietly sifting through Blitzo's phone.  Smiling down, at a smaller version of Blitz with big amber eyes acting Goofy along with Fizzoralii. 

Others were of the vermin and his misses, acting, lovey-dovey. The Cowboy growls, deleting them, along with various pictures of Stolas. 

Striker is visibly taken aback when he peers over the couch; seeing Blitz shiver, his skin is like ice: cold to the touch.  The snake imp leans over, wiping away a stray tear before taking a quick picture. 

" Wait for a bit longer, darlin, and we can be together. It won't be long now, I'll have full-filled my contract, and  I'll be able to open your eyes to the world around you- and we can move on to the next ring".

  "Soon, you won't have any use for these vermin. As soon I put a bullet in birdy's brain, I plan to drag you, kicking and screaming into the Night." 

Striker keeps tabs on Blitz, tracing his every step watching his interactions, and charting them down.  As Blitz strays down a path of uncertainty away from the watchful eyes of IMP and the steely gaze of the owl prince. 

Blitz stumbles into an abandoned apartment building. Feeling uneased, he looks around. Finding a shrine of pictures of himself decorating the walls, photographs, and sketches.  

Images of him, going throughout his day, pictures of him inside his office, drinking his coffee or with a member of IMP, standing accusingly over him. 

IMP, Loony, Mildred, and Moxie: their faces were scratched out like a mockery of-   his face pales as his heart races.  As he flings open the door, a hand reaches out, pale fingers wrapping around his wrist, tugging him back inside. 

"Been a while, Blitzy, Striker purrs into his ear.   It's not too late,  darlin. You can still join me in my hellish crusades. 

When Striker reveals himself to Blitz, cornering him inside an abandoned apartment.  

"Do you know what a devil's deal is, darlin, hisses Striker. "I want to make one with ya. I'll give ya anything you want, Sugar-cube."  

"The only thing you have to do is open the window, the prince will never see it coming." 

Will Stolas realize the danger that his little impish plaything is in,  as Striker offers more than just a partnership?  But a binding of souls. Will the commander uncover that this was all some clever ploy to lure Blitz away?  

Can the Owl and the rest of IMP piece together the clues Striker has left behind. 

Is the Cowboy working alone, or will a childhood friend from the past shine some light?   

Will Blitzo escape Striker in time, or will his fate be sealed as he is meant to play a crucial role in the devil's dealings?