#my room it’s big enough for how often I rearrange it lol

[bookpillows]

I definitely think will enjoy fall/winter and dark days if I properly revamp my room but other than getting a new chair and maybe a new desk idk what else to do :(

[justletmeplayminecraft]

It doesn't happen often, but sometimes Mumbo will find himself frozen in place, struck down with fear and doubt.

He'll find his mind echoing with the "but what if" and "you're not good enough to stop them leaving" and he'll begin to lose his vision as his eyes become clouded with tears.

He'll take out his communicator and, with shaking hands, send a message into chat;

<MumboJumbo>: Hey I need some reassurance, could someone stop by?

And the hermits will always stop by. Sometimes just one, sometimes many, but he'll always get at least one hermit at his side in a matter of minutes.

"It's okay" they'll tell him. "We'd never abandon you" they'll say.

"Wherever we go, you'll always be welcome. Until the end of time."

oh my gosh this is so good ;-; hold on lemme see what i can write

warnings for self-doubt, fear of abandonment, implied anxiety attack

Mumbo knows what caused it this time. A combination of late nights, feedback on the HCBBS and being in Scar's base. Everywhere he looks is an incredible creation, more amazing than he could ever hope to achieve. He's felt the thoughts building over the past few days, shoving them down as deeply as he can. Which is always a mistake.

Ironically, it all spills over when he's looking at those same tiny mushrooms that excited him so much before. It's just so clever! It's so smart! And it's something Mumbo would never think to do. He's not smart like this, doesn't have Scar's creativity. He has no idea why the hermits keep him around when they could have more people like Scar. Probably because they know he has nowhere else to go, because they're good people and-

No, no. He tries to remember Xisuma's advice. He needs to breathe. Don't spiral. Long breath in, hold, long breath out. In, hold, out. His vision is blurry, eyes stinging with tears.

He keeps that mantra in his head as he pulls out his communicator. Hands trembling, he manages to navigate to the global chat. He doesn't bother reading the previous messages.

<MumboJumbo> csb somebody come over? need somrone rn

<Xisuma> mumbo? where are you?

<GoodTimeWithScar> Mumbo?

<ZombieCleo> where are you mumbo?

<MumboJumbo> msgic village

<ZombieCleo> omw

<Xisuma> let me know if you need back up

<ZombieCleo> will do.

By the time Mumbo hears rockets overhead, he's curled into the base of a tree. The bark presses hard against his back, his face hidden in his knees. He focuses on his breathing. All of those thoughts are blocked out of his head. He knows they're stupid, he knows. The hermits must be so tired of this by now-

"Mumbo." A voice calls, derailing that notion. "Where are you?" He raises his head, rubbing his eyes with a sniffle.

"I'm over here." Mumbo's voice shakes as much as the rest of him. There's a crunching of grass, and he flinches when he hears a twig snap. Soon enough, a wave of red hair falls in front of him, Cleo crouching to his level. She has a gentle smile that is in such contrast to her usual sarcasm.

"Hey, Mumbo. You want to go inside?" He nods. He can't quite find the words to say, so he accepts Cleo's hand as she pulls him to his feet. His suit is crumpled, pulling in all the wrong places and it only feels more stifling. Cleo walks with purpose, searching each building until she finds one that's mostly liveable, with a fair amount of grumbling about Scar and chestmonsters.

It is nicer inside the house. She sits him down on an old sofa, ruffling through already messy locks. The suit jacket is discarded and laid carefully over an armchair. Mumbo tucks his feet onto the edge of the sofa, wrapping his arms around long legs. A blanket is soon wrapped around his shoulders. Mumbo snuggles into it, disappearing until he's a head and two black socks in a pile of blue fabric.

"There you go, do you want some tea?" Mumbo nods. Tea sounds nice right now. He gets a good hair ruffle before Cleo vanishes in search of the kitchen. He can still hear her moving around, cursing under her breath as she tries to navigate Scar's overflowing storage. Mumbo laughs softly, more air than noise. He closes his eyes, resting his chin on his knees.

Cleo's good to him. She came here so quickly, like she often does. If not Cleo, then it would've been another hermit. They always drop everything to come help him. He just- is he really worth that effort? He doesn't do anything in return for them. Maybe it was a mistake calling someone over, he should've just dealt with this on his own, they're going to get frustrated he keeps doing this-

"Mumbo," Cleo calls. Mumbo blinks as he finds himself back in reality. "I can hear your thoughts from here. Do you want honey in your tea?" Mumbo squeezes his fingers into the soft material of the blanket, listening to a distant kettle boil. He breathes in a scent similar to a library. Something old, with a hint of magic.

"Yeah, honey would be nice."

"Got it!" He occupies his mind by looking around the room, naming each of the things he can see. There's a bookshelf against one of the walls. The top two shelves are decorated by various trinkets. Little statues and toys, sentimental items that Mumbo doesn't know the meaning of. The bottom shelves are filled with books from various designers. Scar showed him some recently, pouring over the art with a bright grin. Mumbo hung onto every word he said. A solitary redstone book sits amongst them, and Mumbo huffs an amused breath.

When Cleo returns, he's looked at the curtains, one of them pulled tied open, the forgotten mugs on the coffee table, the various doodles scattered in sheets of paper, the plants that are somehow alive and Cleo, who isn't. She smiles, passing Mumbo the mug. He curls his hands around it, pleased the heat isn't unbearable.

"So which ones do I need to fight this time?" She asks. Mumbo chuckles. The blanket has slipped further back so his hands can stick out.

"You don't need to fight anything," he replies. Cleo crosses her arms, dropping into the space next to him.

"Really?" He looks into the steaming tea. Cold isn't a problem in the jungle, not during the day. But the heat is a good grounding point. Though he could get lost in the way the steam catches the light, shimmering white patterns painted in the air.

"It's the usual," he finally concedes. "With some added 'I'm only bothering you and you're all going to get tired of needing to help me.' You know." Cleo hums. She does know. Mumbo sometimes wishes his doubts would get more adventurous, and then remembers what a terrible idea that would be.

"Do you have the book?" She asks. Mumbo shakes his head.

"I think I left it in my- no, Scar's base." He would usually keep his book of affirmations in his enderchest, but he was a bit flustered with the whole move. He thinks he left it under his pillow.

"I'll ask Scar to bring it over later."

"You don't-" She gives him a look. "Okay. Thank you," he amends. Taking a sip of the tea, he sighs. Cleo knows just how he likes it. The honeyed taste is a much-needed treat.

"So, you know what I'm going to say?"

Mumbo smiles, telling her, "Say it anyway."

"Mumbo, you could be the biggest spoon in the world, and we'd still keep you around, right?" Mumbo laughs, falling into the script with ease.

"Right."

"You're our family. We don't care if you don't achieve these incredible feats, though you do, by the way. We're lucky to have you here, and it makes me smile everytime I see what you're up to. Big or small." He hides his wet smile behind a sip of tea. There's no hiding the tears gathering in his eyes. "Mumbo, you're an amazing person, alright? The best annoying baby brother I could ask for. Wherever we go, you can come with us. As long as you want to."

"And if that's forever?"

"Then it's forever. And I'll consider myself lucky everyday you decide to stick around." Mumbo sinks back into the sofa, finally letting go of the tension he was subconsciously holding. "Right. Now let me read all the chat messages."

Mumbo laughs, reaching up to wipe his eyes, "Seriously?"

"We care about you, you dork." Cleo sits forward, holding her communicator up. She takes a deep breath, continuing in her best gameshow voice, Mumbo laughing the moment she speaks, "And first up, we have Xisuma! Asking me to tell you that he cares about you and he's always here if you ever need to talk." Mumbo settles back, a wide grin on his face, content to listen.

-

Cleo carefully takes the mug from Mumbo's hands, the redstoner offering no resistance as he yawns. His eyes are half open, blinks growing longer every time. She brushes hair from his face, gently lying him down until he's resting in her lap.

"There you go," she soothes. Mumbo quietly rearranges, hugging Cleo's legs. "You've done so well. You can rest now." Mumbo's sleepy hum brings a smile to her face.

She watches as Mumbo's breath evens out, his body growing heavier on her. She carefully tucks the corner of the blanket in before pulling out her communicator, snapping a quick photo.

<ZombieCleo shared a photo>

<ZombieCleo> mission successful

<Xisuma> :-D

<Stressmonster101> awwwwwwww <3

<iskall85> some much needed sleep i'd say

<GoodTimeWithScar> I'll be over with the book when I find it

<ZombieCleo> don't worry, i think he'll be out for a while lol

She smiles at her communicator and the lanky redstoner in her lap. There are very few sights that warm her undead heart more than this. She leans back, and settles in for however long Mumbo needs her.

[koalitypop]

quarantined with bts

a/n: guys, i’m so sorry for not posting these last few months! i’m currently working on the third chapter of How to make a bookworm fall in love with (all of) you and there is a very long one shot that i work on. my dad got the coronavirus so i’m currently quarantined, so i guess i will have time to write and edit more. writing this while being quarantined was so much fun lol. anyways, i hope you enjoy this post! see you soon! 

warnings: smut (implied), spanking, cockwarming, hickeys, quarantine anxiety, burn-out

▸ Kim Namjoon 

Although he usually overworks himself, he’ll spend the quarantine relaxing and spending more time with you  

Not that he won’t work at all, of course not, he’ll probably spend good 3 to 4 hours a day at his studio at home, but 4 hours are nothing compared to working all day in his main studio at the agency

He’ll probably read a lot, something he truly enjoys but doesn’t really have the time to do

You two probably spend many afternoons cuddled up on the couch reading

As Namjoon’s taste is a bit too philosophical for you, you rarely read the same book, but you always discuss the books you are reading

When it comes to food, the first few days you try to cook together, making everything super romantic, but at some point, you realise that you can’t clean the whole kitchen every day because of Joon’s clumsiness and the often-following food fights, so you either cook by yourself or just order take out  

At first, he feels anxious and quite stressed out about being quarantined, not being able to leave the house freely and just live normally, but he quickly calms down and helps you out if you are also feeling stressed out  

He will get really touchy and needy from time to time, but overall, you won’t indulge in more sexual activities or skinship than you usually do

But you will surely try something new in the bedroom  

You have so much free time, might as well use it in the best way possible

Talking about sexual activities, spending so much time at home won’t affect him negatively, he will definitely need you just as often as he normally does

Taking into consideration that you are at home all day for a pretty long time he will leave more hickeys  

Will also spank you 100% as now you can always sit on a comfortable pillow or make yourself comfortable at home  

On the other hand, he will cuddle you a lot, especially in the evening  

As you want to be informed, you watch the news every evening

He holds you close while watching them, because he feels frightened listening about what is happening all over the country and all around the world, afraid that something might happen to you  

He will try to do things he has always wanted to do, now that he has more free time, but ends up realising that most of those things require communication and contact with other people and will quickly come back to you and ask you to do a movie marathon on the couch, to which, come on, you could never say no

▸ Kim Seokjin

Dedicates himself fully to you  

Normally he has to work a lot, he practices a lot sometimes more than he has to because he is still sometimes insecure about his skills (PLEASE SUPPORT THIS MANN, HE DESERVES THE WORLD), so he can’t always make time for you

But now everything is different!

All the cuddles you could ever ask for – you got them  

The first few days you don’t even enter the kitchen  

Because he is honestly such a good cook and you enjoy his meals a little bit too much to think of cooking  

In a few days, the guilt becomes too much and you cook for the entire day, later on, you split all the chores, so that you both have to do equal amounts of chores around the house

Jin tries to do everything he didn’t have the time to do with you  

Well, he can’t do exactly everything because of the lockdown, but he makes sure to try everything you can do at home  

He tries paint-by-number books and even orders a huge picture of you both paint by number

He also wants to rearrange some of the furniture in certain rooms

Now he finally has the time to fix some stuff around the house, which you thought you would need an electrician or just an expert for  

Jin is just that smart and knowledgeable

When it comes to trying new things, he doesn’t forget the bedroom  

Cockwarming becomes the keyword of your quarantine  

Probably tries everything he has ever wanted to try with you but didn’t find the time for  

On the other hand, he also wants to relax  

So maybe in about 10 days when everything is fixed, rearranged and tried, his sleep habits start to slightly change  

He starts to sleep more and you also realise that he sleeps much more calmly now

Jin knows that he can’t do much about this situation so he doesn’t worry his beautiful head too much  

If you are too stressed, he would definitely find a way to calm you down  

At a certain point, this quarantine becomes more like a big holiday he spends at home  

Now he has so much time he can spend with you, all he really needs is you, a quiet and peaceful atmosphere and your affection

▸ Min Yoongi

You may think that he will finally decide to spend some time to relax  

You thought wrong  

The fact that the entire world is closed down doesn't mean that he won’t work  

You would have to drag him from the studio and get him back home  

After you give him a piece of your mind, he will start relaxing more  

Will show you how thankful he is to you in various ways  

He will make you breakfast in bed  

Cuddle you and give you all the affection he is capable of  

And most importantly – that man will give you all of him in the bedroom  

As he always needs to pay attention on how much time he has till the next practice, meeting, concert or anything else, he often can’t spend as much time as he wants to with you, no matter whether you are having sex or just chilling on the couch

So this quarantine has allowed him to make up for all the time he has missed with you  

Because he is an introvert, he doesn’t truly stress so much about spending much time without going outside  

He mostly feels sad not being able to hang out with the boys as much  

Of course, he also misses the feel of being on stage, he genuinely misses the fans

When he is not spending time with you, he tries to take on new hobbies, work on some more music and do V-Lives  

As you often drew in your free time or when you just wanted to free your mind, he decided to give it a try

Sometimes he ends up doing something with you he would never do on his own and just starts thinking about how grateful he is for having you in his life

As he doesn’t work as much and you are not always with him, he has more time to think, which sometimes leads to overthinking

Fortunately, you are always there to take him out of the darkest places of his mind and cheer him up

From time to time he gets a bit too energetic than he usually is

Usually in these times he suggests on trying a yoga challenge or just working out, of which we all know he is not a big fan  

Will start to talk about the most random things out of the blue  

Like you are cooking in the kitchen and he comes to you with “Is a hotdog a sandwich?”  

Of course, most of the time he is more on the philosophical side “If we don’t know what happens after death, how do we know that we don’t live in the world after death?”  

Sometimes you can’t even come up with an answer, it’s that random

No matter what he does, he just wants you to be with him  

Because he realises that the world is going through some very dark times and he wants to make sure that you are always by his side

▸ Jung Hoseok 

The first few days you can’t make this man get out of bed  

Because he is always on the go, putting a smile on his face and trying to be super positive even when he feels like he wants to be all alone and cry, he just needs to take as much of this situation and stay in your guys’ quiet and warm bedroom

Keep in mind that if he doesn’t get out of bed that also means that the only reason for you to get out of bed is to go to the toilet or pick up the take out

No, you guys don’t even cook the first few days, you just want to enjoy the first peaceful days without work or anything else stressing you out  

After a few days of relaxation, Hoseok is ready to face the world again  

You spend the whole day doing chores and stuff like that

Which is still lots of fun because you’re with your lovely Hobi of course

Every night becomes a movie night now that you have so much free time

You are both cuddled up on the couch, not really watching the movie, more like enjoying holding the love of your life tight, some making out every now and then  

Well, this making out often lead to making love, but honestly, what else could be expected by you two – there is so much love and passion in your relationship that you simply can’t get enough of one another

He still tries to relax a lot tho, so don’t expect many experiments or trying outs of new kinks  

The man just wants to chill and love you, is that so much?  

Of course, he also works on some new music

You spend an entire day in the studio with him, he teaches how to create beats and you even record your own song together  

Although you will never show this song to anyone, it’s very nice to do something like this with you  

He doesn’t often go to the main practice room, he’d rather dance in the small dance room he has made in your house  

He soon misses the boys and ARMY, which leads to many V-Lives  

He even invites you to do a V-Live with you, but you end up too shy to participate  

He is very intelligent and interested in various topics, so you guys talk a lot about everything that comes to your mind  

At a certain point Hoseok starts thinking what the situation would be if it wasn’t just the two of you  

What if you had a dog?

Or a cat?

Or a child?  

Maybe two?  

Okay, three might be a little bit too much for now  

He talks with you about creating a family together, something he has thought about before, but now he sees that the time has come, you are at this particular level in your relationship when he can talk with you about marriage, family and babies

And your positive reaction definitely makes him realise that you are the one he wants to spend his best and worst days with  

So, you know, you should expect something like a ring when this quarantine finally comes to an end  

▸ Park Jimin

Oh dear, you are not ready for what is about to come  

You see, at first, he is very sad and overall, in a very dark place mentally because he can’t be with his members, ARMY, people are suffering all over the world

But he soon realises that he can make the best out of this situation by spending all the free time he has with you

He truly misses going out on dinner dates at a fancy restaurant, going to the park or doing anything else outside, but hey, there is plenty of stuff you both can do at home  

Prepare yourself for endless affection  

Cuddles? He has invented them.  

Will literally make the strangest excuses to cuddle

“Darling, the dishes are washed, come cuddle me!”

Everything is still pretty normal till the little demon in him comes out and he starts tickling you or just trying to get your attention when you are busy doing something

Speaking of demons, he finally has the time to do something he has wanted to do in a very long time – all day sex and cuddles

He’ll experiment a lot in the bedroom, especially now when he has all the time he could have asked for  

He is another one who will mark you a lot during the quarantine

But if you mark him, that will make him go crazy  

He will love it so much; he will show off your hickeys every time he goes outside

The fact that he doesn’t have to hide them just makes him love them more  

Normally you guys have a lot of movie nights (a lot taking into consideration his hectic schedule), but now that he can take his time you two choose to spend more time reading  

Jimin loves reading and is happy to finally have the time to do so  

If you share the same taste about books, he might even read you some of his or your book to sleep  

He still practices a lot

He sometimes takes you with him to the studio  

Shows you some of the newest choreographies and dances some of your favourite ones for you  

He tries to write a song for the new album  

Of course, the song is inspired by his love for you  

You are his muse for everything  

You guys go grocery shopping every other day and it’s honestly so? much? Fun

You have always seen grocery shopping as a chore, but now when it is pretty much the only excuse to go outside and as you are with Jimin, you just love it  

He just grabs random products and makes super weird jokes, but you love them  

He will also buy the things each member loves and make a gift basket, which he will leave by the door  

At first, he doesn’t want the members to know it was him but when he starts to ask them if they have received anything these days it will be obvious that it was him

At the end of the quarantine, you both figure out that you had a great time, only because you were together

▸ Kim Taehyung

He has been so tired and burned out for such a long time that he is honestly thankful for this lockdown  

Will spend the first few days eating take out, listening to some good music and napping and cuddling in bed with you

He enjoys just being with you, so the first few days you don’t talk as much  

After some time he just gets energised and has 2897492 ideas what to do  

He is not very vocal about what he wants, so sometimes you will have to guess what he wants to do  

Surprisingly it takes him a lot of time to start missing going outside  

Of course, he instantly misses the members and ARMY  

Randomly calls them asking them how are they coping  

Will watch the V-Lives each member does  

Gets more active on Weverse and Twitter  

When he finally starts to miss the outer world, but realises there is not much to do out there, he suggests creating matching outfits for when you can go back to being social  

You literally spend a whole day doing that  

You even take some photos together, which later you both use for lock screens  

He finds a set of lacy lingerie, which he has never seen before  

The price tag is even still on

He makes you wear it the very same night  

Let’s say that you won’t be able to go out of your bedroom for some time and the reason for that is definitely nor the quarantine  

You guys watch vintage films pretty much every night  

The whole aesthetic just inspires him

He writes a few songs throughout that time  

He is not entirely sure if he wants to record and post them anywhere because they are deeply personal

Which means that they are about you  

One day when you both are grocery shopping; he buys a few succulents and plants them  

Names each of flower after you and the members

Of course, your flower is exactly next to his  

When he does that you realise that he really misses them, but because of the virus he doesn’t want to visit them, because he understands that it is somewhat dangerous and it is in fact pretty anxious about this whole situation  

So you decide to invite the members for dinner  

Tae doesn’t know for this and when he opens the door to see Jimin, he is immensely happy  

Won’t admit it, but he even cried a little  

The guys stay for the night  

Well, they don’t really sleep, they stay late and talk about all the things they missed in each other’s lives throughout this quarantine  

▸ Jeon Jungkook

Is so stressed out  

He calls his family and the members every day to check up on them  

You can’t leave the house without a mask, gloves, disinfectant hand gel and tissues  

God forbid if you get late or don’t pick up the phone  

He is honestly so scared because he just can’t imagine life without you  

On the other hand, he will spend many days mainly gaming  

He finally has the time people normally do at his age  

At home, he fools around a lot with you  

Many pillow and tickle fights  

You always end up cuddling  

Every now and then he starts overthinking everything  

He gets so sad and depressed when this happens

Half of the songs he writes throughout the quarantine are based on the emotions he has felt because of his overthinking habits  

The other half is about you, of course

Apart from writing lyrics, he works on producing some new stuff  

It takes him some time, actually lots of time, but he wants to make sure that everything is perfect  

He also works on the latest choreographies and tries to come up with new ideas about choreographies for future songs  

When it comes to dancing, you often randomly start dancing in the kitchen  

Nothing particular, just swaying around and kissing

These kisses often lead to more sexual stuff, just keep that in mind  

Sex with him is always interesting, so nothing really changes  

Maybe you will have more sex in comparison to the times when you are both working

He will also ask you to teach him how to do various things  

He also admires you because you are so intelligent, one of the things he loves the most about you  

He picks up some of your habits  

He even starts talking a bit like you  

The members tease him a lot about that afterwards  

“Oh, and Jungkook, since when do you use the word invaluable?”  

Talking about the members, apart from calling every day, he will video chat with them a lot  

Like everyday  

One day you go to the kitchen, wearing only his T-shirt and some underwear, your hair is a mess because of the last night activities  

You don’t even see Jungkook talk with Seokjin till you hear Jin saying “Oh, and say hi to Y/n from me, she looks fabulous today”  

Since that day Jungkook always tell you in advance when he is going to talk with one of his members

taglist: 

@omg-sol-s-dreamland​ @salomea27​ @ireallylikefoodandyoutube​ @purpleheartsfortae​ @hodginss​ @forff101 @take-u-2-an0ther-w0r1d​ @livetay84​ @thefangirlsoul​

[artificialqueens]

Girls in Love, Chapter 1 (Viopearlax) - Grey Darling

A/N: Hello friends! It's been a while lol. Anyway, here's the first chapter of my new Viopearlax fic, in which useless lesbian Pearl must navigate the perilous landscape of polyamorous romance while trying desperately not to lose it altogether. This is mostly just setting the scene - things are gonna get shippy in the next chapter. Special thanks to @dollalpaca for beta-ing this literal centuries ago. Hope you all enjoy!

“I’m getting married.”

Pearl almost choked on her water. “I’m sorry. You’re what?”

When Scarlet had asked Pearl out to dinner that night, Pearl had assumed it was just for a catch up. She hadn’t seen her little sister for ages, so of course she’d jumped at the opportunity when Scarlet had messaged her that morning. All she’d expected was banter, a good laugh at all the stupid shit they used to do when they were kids; the last thing Pearl anticipated was for her baby sister to tell her she was getting married, while Pearl herself was struggling to get someone to go out with her on more than one date. Wasn’t the older sister supposed to find their soulmate first?

But Scarlet was beaming. “I’m getting married!”

“Since when? Jesus, Scarlet, I didn’t even know you were dating anyone.”

“You so do!” Scarlet retorted, pouting. “You literally met her last year.”

“I did? Who the hell was it?” At this point, Pearl had no idea whether to be angry or just confused. “I mean, seriously, Scarlet, you’re what, twenty? Twenty one? You’ve got shitloads of time before you need to make any big decisions like that. This isn’t the kind of thing you can just decide to do on a whim.”

Scarlet stared down at her half-empty plate, tugging at her bottom lip with her teeth. When she spoke, she was quiet. “I thought you’d be happy for me…”

“I am- I mean- I don’t know.” Pearl slumped back in her chair. “I just… I think you’re a little young, that’s all. Give it a bit longer with this guy, maybe a year or two. If you’re still into him by then, then by all means, tie the knot. But-”

“She isn’t a guy, Pearl. She’s a she.” Clearly upset, she stabbed into a piece of pasta with force. “I thought you knew I liked girls?”

“I do.”

“So why’d you assume she was a guy?”

“I don’t know! I’m not exactly in the greatest headspace right now, Scarlet. Fine, you’re engaged to a girl you barely know-”

“I do know her! And I’m in love with her!”

By now, it felt as though the entire restaurant was staring at them. Pearl shot Scarlet a narrow eyed look. “Can you keep it down?”

“No! I thought you’d be happy for me, but I guess that’s just too fucking much for you. I was gonna ask you to be one of my bridesmaids, but if you’re gonna be such a bitch about it I’ll ask someone else!”

Pearl sighed heavily, squeezing her eyes shut. By the time she opened them again, Scarlet was pushing her chair out from the table, the harsh scraping of wood against wood just making everything feel worse. “Wait, Scarlet-”

“I’m done. Good fucking night.”

Pearl just watched as her little sister stormed out of the restaurant, clearly not intending to pay for their meal judging by the way she breezed past the counter without so much as a glance. Well, this wasn’t how she wanted this meal to end.

Pearl knew she was right. She knew that Scarlet was way too young to be getting married, and she highly doubted Scarlet had known this girl long enough to make a serious commitment. If Pearl couldn’t even guess who this fiance was, it was a bad sign—if something important happened to Scarlet, Pearl was always the first to know about it. Surely if she’d met the girl of her dreams, Pearl would’ve received at least five essay length texts about her by now. But she hadn’t, and that made Pearl incredibly suspicious.

At the same time, she absolutely hated the idea of her little sister being mad at her. From the moment Scarlet was born, she and Pearl were as thick as thieves, and any argument they ever had was always resolved ten minutes later, both of them sobbing and apologising profusely to each other. But somehow, Pearl knew she’d overstepped the line this time, and that it would take a lot longer than ten minutes to win Scarlet’s forgiveness. And frankly, that made her feel sick.

Sighing, Pearl hailed the waiter, deciding that a stiff drink was in order.

***

“She still hasn’t texted you back?”

“Nope.”

“Shit. You must have really pissed her off.”

Pearl groaned, turning around to softly bang her head against the metal surface of Katya’s all American Russian food truck. It was a place Pearl would often go to for wise counsel and sage advice, although often the hardest part was figuring out where Katya had parked the damn thing. Katya herself, who’d been one of Pearl’s best friends since she moved to the city, reached through the window of her truck to pat Pearl on the head.

“There, there.”

Pearl glanced up at her with a glare, not in the mood for half-assed comfort. Katya raised her hands in mock surrender.

“Sorry! What do you want me to say?”

Letting out yet another groan, Pearl turned back around to lean with her back against the truck. “I don’t know. Can you tell me I’m not a massive bitch?”

“Ok. You’re not a massive bitch.”

Somehow, it didn’t sound as comforting as Pearl thought it would. But then again, she’d imagined it coming out of Scarlet’s mouth, not Katya’s. “Thanks, I guess.”

“You’re just a bit of a sour puss today, aren’t you?” Katya started rearranging the various condiments she had adorning the window of the truck, not having much else to do since the lunch rush had come and gone. “Or are you just having an existential crisis?”

“Probably the last one. I just feel conflicted, Kat.”

“Right.”

“I want to feel happy for her, but I’m also worried about her. Does that make sense?”

“Yep.”

“Good. So I’m not going crazy.”

Katya thought for a moment before responding. “I don’t think anyone would think you’re going crazy. You’re worried about your sister getting married when she’s like, still at college. Why wouldn’t you be?”

“But you should’ve seen her last night. She looked like I murdered her puppy or something.”

“I mean, by the sounds of it you did stomp all over her romantic dreams.”

“Oh, fuck off, I did not.”

Katya chuckled, bringing out that bright, toothy grin of hers. It was usually infectious, but not today. Pearl was inoculated with guilt. “Well, would it make you feel better if you met the person she’s getting hitched to?”

“I mean, I’m trying to convince her to meet up with me again, and I’ve told her she can bring her girlfriend - uh, fiance. But she isn’t replying. I’m literally blowing up her phone and getting fuck all in return.”

“Hmm. It’s a tricky one. Maybe she just needs time to cool off?”

“Maybe. I just don’t want to wait - I want to be friends with her again.”

Katya pursed her lips before reaching her hand out. “Gimme your phone, I wanna see what you said.”

“Katya, I’m not giving you my phone.”

“Come on! I wanna see if you’re being apologetic enough.” When it was clear Pearl wasn’t going to relent, Katya pushed harder. “Trix says I’m really great at being a warm and friendly person, y’know. Maybe I could write you a really good apology.”

Pearl shook her head. “That’s not happening.”

“Aw, why not?”

“Because I’ve fucked up enough as it is. I’m not going to be that disingenuous to let someone else apologise for me. If Scarlet finds out about that, it’ll just make things worse.”

“You’ve got a point. Well, I guess you’re just doomed to wait it out.”

“Fuck…”

Just as the curse left her mouth, Pearl’s phone pinged. Katya’s eyes widened as Pearl scrambled to grab her phone out from the pocket of her jeans. It had to be a reply from Scarlet, it couldn’t be anything else. Somehow, she must have subconsciously known how much Pearl was beating herself up over their disastrous dinner the night before and felt the need to text her and reconcile. That was how the universe worked, right?

Pearl grabbed her phone, Katya leaning out of the window so she could see the screen. Almost nervous, Pearl tapped on the home button, lighting up the screen and revealing the text she was so desperate to see.

SHEA: Can you fill in for my shift tonight? Not feeling too hot. Thanks!!

*** Being the good friend that she was, Pearl did fill in for Shea’s shift that night. No, spending an extra seven hours at the dodgy bar she worked at wasn’t exactly what Pearl wanted to be doing, but at the very least it would take her mind off of Scarlet.

Or at least, she thought it would.

No matter how many cluttered trays of drinks she was made to serve, she kept on replaying her and Scarlet’s argument in her head again and again, the sense of guilt almost too much for her. Every single female customer she served had her wondering - is that the girl my sister’s getting married to? She knew it was a ridiculous thought. Scarlet would rather die than spend a second with the lowlifes that frequented the bar, but that didn’t stop Pearl from worrying about it.

Maybe she should’ve just been a good sister and supported Scarlet’s idea to get married. It wouldn’t have been that hard, right? She didn’t have to go all responsible, killjoy big sister on her and crush her romantic dreams. Scarlet was old enough to make her own mistakes, right? And who even knew whether or not this marriage would be a mistake? Maybe Pearl was just being paranoid?

These were the kind of thoughts that plagued her the entire night. She’d arrived at work at 8pm, all decked out in her skanky waitress uniform, hoping that work would take her mind off of her current crisis. But there she was, three hours later, hiding out in the break room because she just couldn’t calm down about it. Did that make her a bad worker? Yes - her break wasn’t for another hour. But she’d be no good to anyone if she spilled a tray of drinks all over a customer because she was too distracted by the image of Scarlet crying her eyes out to look where she was going.

Scrolling through all the text messages she’d sent to Scarlet, Pearl began to second guess what she thought had been perfectly acceptable apologies.

PEARL: I’m sorry about last night. Can we meet up and talk about it?

PEARL: I didn’t mean to offend you. I’m just worried. Sorry again - let me know if you’re free to meet up?

PEARL: I’m sorry, Scarlet. Please text back.

PEARL: I could shout dinner? We could get Indian takeout and talk this over. Like adults.

PEARL: You could bring your girlfriend? I want to meet her.

PEARL: Sorry. I was a bitch last night. Please text me back?

And still no reply. Maybe Pearl would be able to get by on the theory that Scarlet had lost her phone, or was out of credit or something. But she didn’t believe any of that for a second - she knew perfectly well Scarlet was pissed at her and not answering her texts for that very reason. It was silly to try and assume otherwise.

“Pearl? Pearl, where the- Oh my god, could you please go back upstairs?” Pearl looked up as one of the other waitresses poked her head into the break room, her full lips shaped into a defined frown. “We’re dying out there, there’s so many people.”

“Sorry, Aja, I’ve just got a lot on my mind.”

“Yeah, and I’m probably gonna get my assed handed to me by dozens of impatient customers. Get your ass up here already!” With that, Aja was gone, her summons impossible to ignore.

Sighing, Pearl quickly checked her makeup in the mirror, straightened her dress, and stepped back out into the bar.

***

It should be illegal to make people work past two am. Pearl trudged into her tiny, cupboard sized apartment, head pounding from an unpleasant mix of not enough water and not enough sleep. At the very least, her daydreams (nightdreams?) about her bed and a nice, cool glass of water had distracted her from the Scarlet issue. So that was a small blessing.

Pearl flicked the light on as she arrived, wincing as the brightness made her headache even worse. She didn’t hate her apartment - it was tiny and under heated, sure, but there was space for a bed, a little kitchenette, a small bathroom off to the side, and her favourite bean bag chair. Plus, it had an amazing view of the city, something Pearl wasn’t planning on complaining about. Her artistic sensibilities had told her that if she didn’t get that view, she’d never forgive herself. She had to constantly remind herself about how great the view was when she was freezing her ass off in winter and would kill for a well heated apartment.

Making a beeline for the kitchenette, Pearl turned on the tap and poured herself a glass of water. It felt like magic as the water passed through her lips; the sticky, dry feeling in her throat vanishing in an instant. It even made her head feel a little better, although the brightness of the light cancelled out any progress on remedying it completely. You win some, you lose some, Pearl supposed.

After a second glass of water, Pearl didn’t even bother getting out of her uniform before collapsing into bed, dragging the duvet covers up to her chin and snuggling down into comfort. She was more than ready to drift off when she realised that she still needed to plug her phone in to charge. So, without making any effort to get out of bed, Pearl reached for her bag and pulled it towards her, digging her phone out from amongst the other items that cluttered it - wallet, pack of tissues, a worrying amount of receipts from Katya’s food truck. It was as she stuck the charger into her phone that the screen lit up, revealing a notification that made Pearl’s heart skip a beat.

It was a text from Scarlet.

Thoroughly jolted awake, Pearl scrambled to sit up and open the text, her thumbs impatiently tapping the screen as she waited for it to open. She bit her lip once it did, her wide eyes reading the text with more concentration than she’d ever read anything before.

SCARLET: Starbucks at 12. I’m bringing Yvie.

[dingletragedy]

Can you write something where Ben and Callum are getting it on (lol) and Ben starts to cry because he gets overwhelmed and can't hear Callum? Just thought it would be something that you would write really well :) x

i’m not sure if this is at all what you wanted anon but here’s a bot of hurt/comfort of you!!! thanks anon <33

The thing about being so close, so intimate, knowing each other so deeply, is that Ben is so easy to read, now.

And sometimes, he falls into these sporadic moods. They roll in quietly, like a brooding storm throughout the day, and by the afternoon, his eyes are distant and his shoulders are hunched in, and he plays with Callum’s hair idly and stares up at the ceiling with heavy breaths.

Ben is cheeky, sarcastic; he’s flirty and charming when he wants to be, eyes full and big. He sings loud and unashamed, watches the mouth of whoever is talking intently and speaks low. He’s responsive to the smallest of touches, pliant under Callum’s hands. He’s a wind-up, but to can charm the pants of anyone he wants.

And yet often, he’s the opposite. He’s closed in and quiet, distant and unaware, insecure and frightened. He’s an open book to Callum, and still, he remains the most private person he’s ever known.

So when his eyes cloud over, when Callum looks up from finishing another online police training course, and Ben is staring resolutely out the window, after lying awake for the majority of the previous night, shifting and breathing heavily and unknowingly keeping Callum up too, Callum doesn’t know why.

Callum settles his laptop on his bedside table, turns to cup a gentle a hand to Ben’s jaw and presses kisses there, plays with his hair and tries to get him to relax. 

Ben has a book held above him, a title that Callum doesn’t recognise against an offensively bright cover. His hair is sticking up everywhere, and his glasses are pressed close to his nose. He looks soft, sleepy, vulnerable. 

He’s been subdued all day, showing up to the cafe at lunch with soft bags under his eyes, claiming a fitful sleep. By dinner, he’d managed to convince Callum that he was absolutely fine, but his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes, and when Jay and Lola had dragged them along for a few evening drink in the Queen Vic, he sat silently in the corner and picked at a loose thread on his shirt.

As Callum pulls away from where his lips had found Ben’s neck, Ben moves the book away from his face slowly, so just his eyes are peeking over the top, silent and watching behind his glasses. Callum threads his hands into his hair slowly, scratching at his scalp, and Ben’s eyes flutter closed slowly as he breathes out. He lowers his book onto his stomach, tilting his head back a fraction.

Callum leans down and presses a delicate kiss to Ben’s forehead, hand still stroking his hair. He trails his lips down the bridge of his nose, so soft, then meets Ben’s mouth, warmth curling in his belly. Ben’s breath is hot and stuttered, Callum leans over him some more, tilting his head.

As their lips move together, Ben slowly rearranges his body, feet stretching down the bed and his whole torso shifting so they’re both facing upwards, so he can reach out and cup Callum’s jaw. He curls forward, curls towards Callum, and pulls him closer bit by bit. 

They find a comfortable position eventually. Callum settled in Ben’s lap, still twirling Ben’s hair absently in his fingers, pushing down to lick into his mouth with a tease of his tongue, trying to get him to relax, to stop him tensing his shoulders. Ben’s hands smooth down Callum’s shoulder blades like honey, settling on his hips.

It’s then, with a slow release of breath, a shift of his hips, and a tight tug at the curls in his fingers, that Callum tips them over gently and gets his hands on Ben properly.

“You good?” Callum asks. 

“Huh?” 

Good? He signs to Ben in response. 

“Oh,” Ben mumbles, cheeks flushed. “Yeah. I’m good. You?” 

“I will be soon,” Callum responds, but it’s obvious from the puzzled look on ben’s fave that words fall flat between them. “You’re all tense, Ben.” 

“Do something about it then,” Ben says, shifting his hips up impatiently. 

“Hm,” Callum raises an eyebrow, teasing. Maybe I will.

They’re both so quiet then, and it feels slightly strange. The radio ebbs around them, but it’s lost on Callum’s ears as he cups Ben’s neck, his fingers meeting at his nape, and feels his pulse against his palms. It’s skyrocketing, thumping, and Callum can feel the tiny tremors of his shoulders, the pressure of his slick mouth and his hands squeezing Callum’s thighs.

He wants to relax him, Callum thinks. Wants to touch him soft and gentle and leave kisses on every inch of skin. Despite the extensive amount of time they’ve spent tangled together, each time feels new, his nerves pulsing with love and desire. Callum wants to strip him bare, wants to push him onto his back and suck mark after mark on his soft chest, between his thighs. He wants him sated and calm, far away from whatever’s troubling him.

“Want you,” Callum says between kisses. “So much.” 

He grabs for the edge of Ben’s shirt and moves to tug it upward.

Ben flinches so suddenly, tears away abruptly, circles Callum’s wrists with an iron grip so hard that Callum lets out a sudden, surprised noise, heart slamming into his ribs. It hurts.

Ben’s head is bowed, his chest heaving suddenly.

“Ben,” Callum rasps in shock, blinking wide. “I’m sorry, I should have asked.”

He doesn’t reply, just continues breathing with a shaking chest, his shoulders quivering. His fingers tight around Callum’s wrists.

Ben,” he tries again. “What’s wrong? You’re scaring me, please?”

He shuffles away, releasing the grip on Callum’s wrist. His face crumples, and he tucks his knees into his chest, his arms wrapping tightly around his stomach, his fingers gripping the material of his shirt as he shakes. He looks so small, so broken, and Callum sits up slowly, unsure of what to do, unsure of what’s happened.

“I hate this,” Ben says, voice quiet and small. “I hate it so much.” 

“We don’t have to do—God, Ben, I wouldn’t ever want to do anything that made you uncomfortable,” Callum tries to apologise desperately, feeling his throat thicken. “I’m so sorry.”

Ben lets out a quiet sound, sliding his glasses off to wipe at his eyes. He throws them onto the floor and presses the heels of his hands into his eyes. “It’s not that.”

His voice is choked and thick, muffled behind his knees. When he wraps his arms around his middle again, eyes devastatingly hollow and mouth scrunched up, he looks fragile and afraid. Callum doesn’t know how to fix it this time. He doesn’t know what to do.

“What is it then?” He asks softly, keeping his distance as Ben wipes at his nose with the back of his hand. He heaves in a shuddery breath, twin droplets sliding down his cheeks.

“I cant—,” He cuts himself off and clenches his eyes closed. “I don’t know what you’re saying.”

“Ben, look at me,” he says, reaching a hand out. What’s wrong? He signs, hands slow and steady. 

When Ben doesn’t respond straight away, Callum continues. “Ben, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, or say anything you don’t want to. We can just lay down for a while, go to sleep, if you’d prefer?”

“No, I—,” Ben blurts, scratchy and strangled, his chest still heaving. “I can’t hear you, and that’s the problem. It all just gets so much sometimes. No matter how hard I try, how much I concentre on your lips, and hands, there are moments, like these, now, when I can’t catch what you’re saying.”

As he speaks, he curls further and further into himself. 

“Hey, hey, hey,” Callum shuffles forward quickly and pulls Ben’s hands away from where they’re digging into his knees, leaving marks, he rubs his thumbs over the knuckles. “Shh, you’re alright.”

He kisses over Ben’s fingers, hushing him and trying to calm him down. Hesitantly, he places a gentle hand on his back and rubs it in slow circles, worried he’ll scare him away.

“I’m sorry,” Callum says then, because maybe it’s irrational, but the guilt clawing at his stomach is unbearable. “I’ll talk slower, clearer, and I’ll sign, if it helps?” 

“No,” Ben cries. “That’s the point, Callum. It wouldn’t work. And it ain’t how it should be, is it? You having to say everything twice, pulling away from me every five seconds just to talk. It ain’t practical, not when we’re, y’know?” 

“It doesn’t matter, Ben,” Callum says, unsure of where he’s going with his. “Whether it’s practical or not, the main thing is that you feel comfortable, and safe.” 

They sit there for what feels like forever, Ben’s back shifting under Callum’s palm, tears dripping along his jaw and from the tip of his nose when he bows his head. When Callum starts to runs his fingers through his hair, brushing it away from his face, Ben’s breathing starts to slow.

“But do you?” Ben asks then. 

“Do I what?”

“Feel safe?” Ben questions, eyes worried, lip bitten redraw between his teeth. “With me? Here?”

“Of course I do,” Callum says, shocked. “You know I do, Ben.” 

“But you could be saying anything,” Ben explains at the furrow in Callum’s brows. “In the moment, when it’s all heated and—you could be—could be telling me to stop, telling me you love me, anything at all, and I wouldn’t even know.” 

“You know me though, don’t you? Callum says, waits for Ben’s nod of confirmation before continuing. “You know my body, my little ticks, what I like and what I don’t. You know my heart, Ben. And I know yours. That’ll always be enough.” 

“You think?”

I know.

“When you put it like that.” 

“It’s just you and me, yeah?” Callum goes again, because he wants to make this as comfortable, as normal, as possible for Ben. He closes his eyes, and continues, “it’s just you and me, in this room that’s become ours. There’s Bitter Sweet Symphony playing on the radio, it’s just started, still on that first stupidly long verse. There are a few stray cars travelling by, the engines rumbling through the open window, and there’s distant chatter pulling through too, but the voices are too far away to make out the words. The washing machine is on in the kitchen, spinning like crazy, the sounds vibrating up through the floor. And then there’s me, telling you that I want you, and that I love you. My voice all low and hoarse, that way it always gets when you’ve got your hands on me.” 

When Callum opens his eyes again, he notices Ben’s are closed. Shut so tightly there are wrinkles around the edges. He’s got this new expression on his face, his mouth now morphing into a slow smile, crease fading in his brow. 

He lets Ben breathe, lets him gather his thoughts. 

He lets him paint a picture of unheard sounds. 

Eventually, Ben takes in a wet, shuddering breath, and when he releases it, Callum’s heart fills with hope. “Thank you, Callum.”

“You don’t need to thank me,” Callum protests. “I wish I could take your pain away, Ben, more than anything. But I need you to know this, you being deaf, it doesn’t change anything, not for us. You’re still you, and we’re still us.

Ben kisses him then, wet and shaky, but it’s the best kind of kiss, where Callum can feel every current of energy flying through him, flowing through Ben and back to him again, over and over. They grasp at each other gently in the dark, chests heaving.

Ben is almost panting into his mouth, breathless, lips mixed with salty tears.

“Lie back,” Callum says hoarsely, guiding him gently to the pillows. The air around them is static, their gazes magnetic, made to be drawn to each other. Ben follows Callum’s words hesitantly, eyes big and soft, reaching for him.

Callum lowers himself down his body slow, keeping their eyes connected always. He wants Ben to be comfortable with this.

You’re beautiful, Callum signs. 

Cal,” Ben whispers. His hands find Callum’s shoulders.

You’re so strong, Callum kisses him again, moving down incrementally. He continues, murmuring praises into Ben’s skin as he moves, brave, inspiring, brilliant, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.

Ben pulls him back up then, kisses Callum with purpose, with love, with everything. “I love you.”

I love you too, Callum draws on the skin of Ben’s stomach, with one single, strong finger. He parts their mouths once more, attaches his mouth to the spot he’d just drawn a heart, and presses one, gentle kiss to the sliver of skin there. He hooks his fingers under the band of Ben’s boxers, before looking up in question.

Ben is watching him intently. He gives Callum a tiny nod, and drops his head back to stare resolutely at the ceiling, swallowing thickly.

[lotusss-flowerbomb]

Chocolate Cake

Bucky x reader

Warnings: FLUFF 

A/N: Yeah so, here’s some fluff. I wasn’t going to post this, because fluff really isn’t my thing, but @sapphirescrolls gave me the courage a few weeks ago and I’m finally getting around to it... It’s literally been done for months. Lol Thank you, Jen!!!

Word Count: 1,485

********

"James Buchanan Barnes, I am going to kill you!!" You ran through the compound towards the common room. Bucky's eyes nearly popped out of his head when he heard your voice. He knew why you were angry, he just didn't think you'd find out so soon. You came barreling through the door, jumped and slid across the table to get to him on the other side. He was too fast. He was already halfway on the other side by the time you'd made it all the way across. You slammed your fist on the wood cursing Tony for buying such a large table in the first place.

"You'll never catch me, unless I want to be caught, doll." Bucky said. You wanted to smack that smug ass grin right off of his face. You scanned the room. Nobody seemed to care that the two of you were at it yet again. It was just another day for them. "Rhodey, your gun?" You ask. Rhodey immediately reached for the gun he always kept on his ankle. A resounding "no!" echoed throughout the room. They all knew you'd shoot him for real. Rhodey just thought it was funny. You turned your attention back to Bucky. "Why did you do it?" "I'm sorry!" "Sorry won't bring it back will it?" You stalked around the table to his side. "Dude, whatever you took, just give it back." Sam chimed in. You crossed your arms over your chest, "Yeah, Buck, give it back." "I seriously don't see what the big deal is? You know, you become very irrational when you're –" he froze not daring to finish that sentence. But by the look on your face, he could tell that it was much too late. The room had gone completely silent. He quickly turned on his heels and fled. Bucky was one of the most feared assassins in the world, an expert marksman, a beast in hand to hand combat and could snap you in two without much effort, but goodness you were a scary little woman when you needed to be.  "You bring your ass back here and fight me like a man, Barnes!!" You ran after him. You knew you'd never catch him, so you hatched a plan to make him come to you.  ******** You retreated to your room for a few hours. You had FRIDAY pull up video from the gym and watched Bucky hit a punching bag with Steve on the other side holding it. "FRIDAY, please turn on the audio." You heard the familiar ping as the sound was added. "So would you like to share with me what earlier was all about?" Steve questioned. "It's stupid," Bucky continued to punch. "You hid in your room for two hours. What did you do?" "I did not hide in my room for two hours. I only made you people think that I did." He stopped and sipped his water. He didn't really need it, but he wanted to stop talking. Steve could be such a pest. You turned off the video convinced that Bucky wasn't going to fess up to what he did. You headed to the elevator still trying to think about what you could do to get back him. You could just go down and corner him in the gym... or, you had a thought, your finger hovered over the buttons before you decided to hit the one for his floor. You skipped off of the elevator and headed to his room. You weren't really surprised to find it so clean and everything in place. You'd bet that it would drive him mad if things were not exactly where he'd put them, so you opted for a bit of rearranging of his room. First, you went through his closet, of course it was color coordinated. Dork, you thought to yourself. You pulled out a hoodie that you saw him wear often and pulled it over yourself. It smelled just like him. You sniffed a few more times before continuing your mischief; slightly pushing things out of their spot and turning them the wrong way, switching drawers and finally jumping around in the neatly made bed. You lied down to await his arrival. You wanted to see the look on his face once he discovered what you'd done. Surely he'd be up soon to change out of his gross gym clothes. You snuggled down in his covers loving how cool and comfortable his bed felt. It smelled like him too. Before you knew it, you'd drifted off to sleep. ******** Bucky had finally decided he'd had enough of training for the day. He headed up to his floor, but could sense something was off the moment he'd stepped off of the elevator. He walked quietly to his room. The sound of your heart beat and breathing evident to him before he pushed the door open. His eyes zeroed in on you tucked under the covers. Then he immediately noticed that everything was out of place. He laughed and shook his head. You stretched and opened your eyes. Pausing at the realization that you were still in Bucky's room. "Well, hello there sunshine," he squinted his eyes at you. "Oh fuck, how long was I asleep?" You sat up. "Long enough," he flipped the page in the book he was reading. You reached over and smacked it out of his hands before climbing out of the bed and heading to the door. A quick look around showed you that he had already put everything back. "That's my hoodie," he said to your retreating back.

"You can have it back when you replace my stuff," you flipped him off and headed out. ******** You hadn't seen much of Bucky for two whole days. He'd made sure to make himself scarce since you wouldn't let this go. You were sitting in the kitchen with the rest of the team when he walked in with a bag. He sat it in front of you, but you didn't move. "You've been gone for a full 48 hours and you walk in here like you haven't been missing?" Steve said. "Chill out, dad, I was... on a mission," he rolled his eyes. "What are you up to, Bucky?" You ask suspiciously. You hadn't reached into the bag yet. You wouldn't put it past him to put something in the bag to get back at you for touching his room or taking his hoodie. "Just open it. I promise no tricks," he held his hands up in surrender. You reluctantly stuck your hand in and pulled out the adorable little black and white panda. He knew they were your favorite. Everyone did. Then you saw it resting at the bottom, a clear container with a slice of chocolate cake inside. "No fucking way!" You pulled it out, "how did you get this?" The cake was from your favorite bakery. A place back in your hometown that had closed its doors for good a few days ago. You'd made a special trip there for the closing just to get your hands on the very last slice of the world's best chocolate cake. "It took me a while to convince her to make it, but I worked my magic." He smiled proud of himself. You jumped out of your chair and hugged him. Planted a kiss on his cheek and chanted thank you over and over again. "So just like that, y'all cool? Sam raised his eyebrows. "Is that what this has been about?" Nat scoffed. "Yes, he ate my chocolate cake," you glared at him. The anger you felt rushing back immediately. "I got you more. We're even. Can I have my hoodie back now?" "Nope, I've grown to love this thing. Good day, sir." You grabbed your goodies and headed up to your room.

******** You tossed and turned for a while before throwing on Bucky's hoodie, grabbing your cake and heading down to the kitchen. When you walked in you saw him sitting on a stool at the island with his head down. "Everything okay?" You ask. His head popped up, "Yeah, I'm fine. Just enjoying the quiet." he gave a half smile. You grabbed two forks from the drawer, slid onto the stool next to him and offered him one. The two of you sat in a comfortable silence as you ate. He watched as you closed your eyes with every bite and forced himself to swallow the lump in his throat. "You did good, Bucky. I'll wash this and give it back to you tomorrow." You pulled on the string of the hood. "Nah," he softly nudged your shoulder with his, "keep it. It looks cute on you." He leaned over, kissed your forehead and strutted out of the kitchen. You ran your fingers across the spot where he kissed you and smiled as you watched him retreat.

[purplesurveys]

1220

The person you had the strongest feelings for dies, do you care?  I imagine so, yeah. I’d check up on her family and help in any way I can, if it’s still welcomed.

Is there something you’re happy about at the moment?  I share this all the time in surveys at this point but I’m just really giddy that it’s a Friday evening hehe. Also, I’m seeing Angela, Hans, and (finally!!!) Reena later! We’ll be going to UP to shoot some photos since Angela and Reena are graduating this year and we wanna take pictures with the sunflowers in the campus before they die out. I also never got to take sunflower photos when I graduated last year, so it will be my chance to do so as well.

Do you want someone dead?  Wow, no.

Do you ever wonder what your ex is up to?  It almost never crosses my mind, honestly.

Have you ever fed or taken care of a stray animal?  I’ve fed many of them before, yup.

What is something you tend to worry about?  Pending deliverables at work, especially ones that are out of my control.

What is something you do that is unhealthy?  Be in front of a screen as soon as I’m awake until the second I turn in.

What is something you do that is good for you?  I’m no longer afraid to prioritize myself when necessary.

What last caused you to force a smile?  Ooh I’m not sure. I haven’t had to do that in a while, which is a good thing. What was the last video game you played? Was it fun?  Probably Mario Kart on the Switch, but it’s been a WHIIIIIIIIIIIIIILE. Yeah it’s one of my favorite series for a reason.

What is something not many people know about you?  The fact that I’m obsessed with anything classic Hollywood and I’m a big Audrey Hepburn fan. The topic never gets brought up so I don’t really get the chance to say anything about that interest of mine.

What word describes your basic style?  Casual, laidback. I’m more than happy with just a simple t-shirt and denim jeans these days and I think I’m over my jumpsuit/romper phase haha.

Have you ever been told you were going to Hell?  It was referred to/threatened to me, but not directly with these words.

Have you ever wanted to kill yourself?  It was a regular occurrence before.

If yes, what convinced you not to go through with it?  I think overall I was just scared of fucking it up and fucking up my brain for life as a consequence. Also I knew no one was going to take care of Kimi as well as I do, and I would never leave him behind.

Have you ever rejected a guy, only to have him push the issue by asking “why?” and insisting that you just need to get to know him better?  Nope.

Is there something that you believe everyone should do and you can’t believe that some people don’t do it (e.g., recycle or go to the dentist regularly)?  It’s definitely an Asian thing but it will sometimes hurt my chest when I see people wear shoes in their homes.

Regarding the last good choice (healthy choice, kind choice, selfless choice, etc.) you made, what was your real motivation behind it?  I wanted to be kind to myself and finally let go of what had been keeping me from starting to be happy and pleased with where I am and have.

What is something that you have had to practice at to get the hang of it? If you can’t think of anything, that’s okay, what’s something you are currently practicing at and trying to master?  This is such a shallow answer lol but I’ve recently gotten into this rhythm game called Rhythm Hive that I found impossible to master at first, but after weeks of practicing I now breeze through all the songs at their hardest level.

Have you ever gone to the store to buy something, like a video game, when it came out at midnight?  I haven’t done that, but I’ve watched a movie premiere at midnight - for both times the Breaking Dawn movies came out.

Regarding the last novel you read, was there a romance included? If so, was it central to the plot?  Yes and yes.

Have you ever done relaxation meditations or listened to relaxation guides or positive-thinking/healing recordings?  Nope, they don’t really work on me. I have my own outlets that help me relax.

Do you have any interests that are also often shared by children?  Coloring is one. Also animated movies; I never grew out of those.

Is there something that could be a solitary activity but you really only like to do it with other people (e.g., watching movies, playing video games, etc.)? Definitely eating out. I’ve done it a couple of times before by myself and it does feel nice, but I also always can’t help but think it would be a lot more fun and that I would be much happier if I was sharing the experience with someone else.

Are you satisfied with the interior design or decoration in your home? Or do you think it needs a total home makeover?  Ugh god I need to rearrange and upgrade my room STAT. My K-Pop merch are starting to pile up but they’re all currently in just lazy heaps scattered around in my room since I don’t have any shelves or anything to properly display them on.

Is there something that you’d like to own but you can’t find it anywhere? If not, can you a remember a time when you wanted something? Did you ever end up finding it or did you eventually stop wanting it? This is always me with BTS merch...

Who makes you smile the most?  My friends.

What piercings do you want/have?  Just one on each earlobe. I’m not looking to have any more.

What's your favorite website?  Twitter.

Do you own a fish tank with fish?  We never had one, no.

Do you like the movie 300?  I’ve never seen it and will probably never have plans to. It’s not my cup of tea.

Do you pop your knuckles?  When I feel stressed or when my knuckles feel strained, yes.

Do you have Photoshop?  Nope, I have no use for it.

Do you use tinypic or photobucket?  Way back in the day. I’m not even sure if those websites still exist.

What’s your favourite song from the 1980s?  Heaven Is A Place On Earth.

How about the 1990s?  I’m not sure I have one.

Have you won anything recently?  Yeah we played this online game over Google Meets with my co-workers just this afternoon, before clocking out. My team won twice.

How often do you make Excel tables? What for?  Oh everyday. I work on a handful of sheets every single day at work, but I also like making spreadsheets for personal use haha. Right now the one I’m currently super invested in is my tracker for all the merch I’ve been buying so I can keep note of my pending payments and which ones I should already be asking for updates on.

What was the last baby animal you saw in the wild?  Not sure, I’m barely outdoors.

Are you always available or online?  Yup.

Do you have dietary restrictions? Or do you just eat what you like?  No allergies or restrictions.

Do you prefer gold, silver or steel jewelry? Or no jewelry at all? Silver.

Have you been binge-watching any shows lately? If so, what?  Not really. I’ve stopped watching Hwarang for now, but I do have plans to come back to it someday. I guess I just haven’t been in a K-drama binge-watching mood lately.

If you dye your hair, do you do it yourself or go to a salon?  I’ve never had my hair dyed.

If you have any, do you like your in-laws? I don’t have any. < Same.

Would it bother you, if your partner had cut contact with their parents?  It depends on the story behind it, but mostly no. How close they are with their family isn’t a priority matter for me.

Have you ever wondered whether you were adopted? All the time, especially as a teenager who wasn’t getting any emotional support at home.

What’s the best physical feeling in the entire universe?  When you work on something and expect mediocre results and feedback, but it ends up getting praised instead and you feel all the hard work pay off.

Have you ever grown a berry bush?  Nope.

Have you done something new to your hair recently?  It’s been untouched since the very start of the pandemic. My sister actually suggested that since I had it cut right when the pandemic started, I should wait out till the end of it and see how long it’ll reach. It sounded intriguing enough so now I’m indefinitely growing it out hahaha.

Do you have bad anxiety? If so, do you take any kind of medication for it? I’m sure I have it, I’ve just never been diagnosed before.

One thing you’ve experienced that you thought you never would have?  Managing to get over a rough breakup quicker than I ever expected to.

What was the last thing someone said to you that kept repeating over & over in your head?  It was when I was leaving Angela’s house yesterday and an “I love you” to her parents rolled out of my tongue so naturally I almost didn’t notice it; and when they said it back in a heartbeat. It’s when I realized that her parents are really like my second parents and that her house is a second home at this point. My heart was filled the entire drive home.

How often do you have late nights out?  Never because we still have a curfew.

If you could, would you work from home? Do you think that would make you more or less productive?  I don’t have a choice; it’s the set-up we’re required to live in. I’m pretty productive here at home but then again I don’t have a point of comparison considering I got my first job already in the midst of the pandemic.

If you had the ability to change the weather, what would you change it to right now?  I would like to bring snow to the Philippines.

Is there something that you really need to do, but can’t seem to get motivated to do it?  Upgrade my room and invest in shelves and other home decor/interior design stuff that would make the space more comfy and homey. Right now it just looks like a warehouse with my merch piled up in scattered places.

Most disturbing movie you have ever seen?  Eraserhead or I’m Thinking of Ending Things.

Has a life goal or dream ever come true for you yet? If yes, what is it? If no, do you think you’ll achieve it?  I have multiple life goals - some of them I’ve achieved, like getting into my dream university and simply getting employed, and some of them I’m still working my way towards, like getting a promotion. Yeah I feel like I’ll achieve my goals someday. I don’t like losing LOL so when I want something I usually put it above everything else.

Have you ever had food poisoning?  Yup.

What are you listening to?  Blue & Grey by BTS.

Do you think there will be a WWIII? I find it inevitable at some point down humanity's future. People are too hateful for it not to eventually. < Yeah, let’s go with this too.

Has anyone ever asked you if you were emo?  No.

Has someone ever liked you that you never thought would?  Yes. Tbh I never expect anyone to like me so I’ve always been surprised when I hear about someone who does.

In all honesty, can a person be too nice?  Yes, especially if they’re starting to be taken advantage of.

Has one of your friend’s boyfriends ever tried to cheat on them with you?  No.

Is mental abuse really as bad as physical abuse?  Any abuse is bad. :/

Do you shop at Sephora for make-up?  Nope.

Zelda: Twilight Princess or Ocarina of Time?  Twilight Princess only because I grew up with it and never got to play Ocarina of Time.

Do you own a rosary?  I did - I went to Catholic school. But I lost mine all the time because I didn’t really care for them lol I always had to buy new ones at the school bookstore.

If you were homeless, how would you cope? I don’t know.

[waejinyoung]

Can’t Swim - EP . 5

word count: 4.4k+

a/n: a quicker comeback unlike last time. i know the ending might annoy some people but i wanted to try out a cliffhanger having got the chance.

warning: swearing, thats it lol

EP . 1 , EP . 2 , EP . 3 , EP . 4 , EP . 5 , EP . 6 , EP .7 , EP . 8 , EP . 9

Well, Friday was unexpected. Friday answered many things. Jinyoung’s job. Jinyoung’s friends. Your feelings. Jinyoung’s feelings towards your feelings. So much happened in one day even you couldn’t believe your life had gotten so much action.

Now it was the weekend and luckily you had things to do to take yesterday’s doings off your mind. The eco-hotel.

Saturday Midday

You had Beck come over for the weekend to work on the eco-hotel together. The sheets for the new hotel plans were distributed across the living room floor and the sun was at its peak. You went over to your air con and switched it on. Beck wasn’t a stranger, so you were dressed in a pair of shorts and an oversized short sleeved top. Your hair was up in a messy bun with a pencil behind your ear. You had all your equipment around the room. To be completely honest, the room was an organised mess. Note the word organised.

“Y/N can we take a break? It’s boiling in this room.” Beck looked absolutely drained from the morning session working to finish the eco-hotel.

“I was about to ask the same thing. Want an ice cream or a cold drink?” You signalled that you were gonna head to the kitchen.

“A cold cup of water should do. I’ll be out on the balcony.” You headed over to your kitchen and grabbed a glass of cold water for both of you.

You made sure to manoeuvre through the sheets of paper without dropping a single drop on the them. You gave the drink to Beck. He downed the whole glass in seconds.

“Beck, if you were this thirsty you’re no stranger you could have gotten some water.” You chuckled at his obvious thirst. You sipped some of your water.

“I didn’t even realise how thirsty I was either. Let me go grab another glass.” Beck went back to grab more water.

“Be careful of all the sheets on the floor. No frog movements please, just be extremely careful.” You shouted back into your home hoping he got the message.

You thought to yourselves how you’ll be able to have all the drawings done for Monday morning. You and Beck decided that it was both of your faults for having one of the pieces of land stolen from the next door firm. Hence why you called off all your employees that were working on this project. So, it was just you and Beck until Monday morning

“It’s going to be a rough weekend isn’t it?” Beck came back onto the balcony and saw your nervous face.

“I’m so scared we won’t finish it on time. I even considered calling the client and completely blowing off the project.”

“Good thing you didn’t. I believe we can do it. Even if it does mean less hours of sleep. This is nothing new Y/N. This has been our lives since the first year of architecture school.”

“Speak for yourself. I didn’t cut any hours of sleep for our under grad.”

“That’s true and somehow you still completed your work with flying colours.” You brushed your shoulders and flicked your hair trying to act out the phrase ‘what can I say? I’m that good’ in actions.

“Don’t get too happy. We need those skills back in action until the end of this project.”

“I think what hurts is that this project is actually finished but the client wants hand drawings as well as digital orthographics. Who even wants hand drawings anymore?” You sighed at the unnecessary request by the client.

“Ya! Don’t say that, especially not near the client.”

“I know, I know. He’s a big deal. Everyone knows him and his creations. Who thought he’d want a hotel built in a small town like Jinhae?”

“I guess he heard about the increasing number of tourists coming to Jinhae, especially during the cherry blossom season. If you ask me, it’s a smart move.” You nodded in agreement.

“Come on, let’s get back to work. Enough chit chat.” You headed back into the living room. Beck straight behind you.

“I finished the floor plans. So, we have elevations and sections to draw. We’ve done the axonometric drawings digitally anyways. Mr Chan is gonna have to excuse us for one missing drawing. I may try and do it if we have enough time.” Beck looked at you with a shocked expression.

“You have all the plans done already? Why in hell are we stressing then?” Beck had a smile on his face. Why in hell is he smiling?

“Why are you smiling? We still have so much to do, come on.” You faffed your hands around trying to get Beck to now focus on his work.

“Okay, okay! I’m working.” You guys returned to working at a reasonably fast pace hoping to have most of the drawings done by the end of today.

6:00 PM

You both ended the day by 6:00 pm. You guys had most of the drawings done by then anyways. Beck had never actually had a sit down session alongside you and was shocked at how quick you were. You were done with your drawings, but he had a couple left which you guys both agreed on finishing for Sunday. You still insisted for him to stay the whole weekend which was the original plan.

You guys made eye contact having declared that was enough for the day.

“Takeout.” You both mouthed to each other at the same time.

“Great minds think alike.” Beck exclaimed as you grabbed your phone to call in your usual order. Pizza. A food that’s simple, easy and you just can’t go wrong with.

“Can you order a x-large for today? I’m feeling extra hungry.”

“Alrighty, give me a second?” You rang up the usual place and processed your order. The person on the other end of the call took your order and read back that it should be there in 20 minutes.

“We have 20 minutes to kill. What do we do?”

“I think you should make a call to the leisure centre too.”

“Why?” Were you missing something?

“The meeting is at 11:00 am. Your swimming lesson?”

“Ah shit. I was looking forward for that lesson too. Maybe I can move the lesson so it’s after the meeting. Are we available then?”

“Bad news. The client said to leave the rest of the day free after the meeting. He didn’t say exactly why but I say we listen to him.”

You were looking forward to seeing Jinyoung. More than that whenever you couldn’t make it for your lessons, Max would be the one to cover for your group. Although, everyone knew that wasn’t a good option considering the awkward situation. But you had no choice, it was now up to Jooheon to solve the issue.

You dialled Jooheon’s number.

“Hey Y/N!” He seemed really cheery. You were sure the news you were gonna give him now would kill the mood.

“Hi Jooheon, got some bad news.”

“What is it?”

“You know about the eco-hotel… The presentation for the project is at 11:00 am on Monday meaning I won’t be able to come for the 10:00 am beginners class.”

“That’s fine. I’ll let Max know he has a cover for Monday.”

You waited in silence hoping Jooheon got the idea why it was bad news.

“Oh shit…” Took him long enough.

“Yh… hence why I said bad news.”

“We don’t have anyone else free during that period too. You know about that.”

“I was going to see if we could rearrange the time but turns out the client wants the whole day off with us. No clue why.”

“I’ll talk with Max, you don’t worry. If you can contact Jinyoung prior to the lesson too that would be great.”

“I’ll try my best to squeeze in some time. We are busy as you could imagine.”

“You guys get back to work. I’ll solve the problem. You don’t need to worry. If that’s all I need to get back to my own work too. Talk to you later Y/N!”

“Thank you so much Jooheon!”

You hung up.

“Sorted?”

You nodded at Beck.

The afternoon continued calmly, and you guys discussed the eco-hotel presentation that’ll take place. The pizza arrived and you guys tucked into your food. Your anxiety was growing as the minutes went by. How was Monday going to turn out?

…

Sunday Evening

You guys were actually ready. You both were shocked after rehearsing the presentation for the 10th time how well produced all the work was.

“I wouldn’t have even thought that I’d be getting a night’s sleep before this meeting.”

“I think sleep was the big motivator. You know how I can last on a hand full amount of sleep.”

“That’s true. You’re useless when it comes to working during the night.”

“Wooow, rude much.”

“I’m kidding. You performed really well. You reminded me why I partnered with you to start up a company.” You smiled at this compliment.

“You gonna stay over tonight as well or crash at home?”

“Could I stay over so we can just go to the meeting together tomorrow?”

“Yeah sure, this is like your second home after all. I feel like you’d also want to take advantage of my signature breakfast.”

“Was I that obvious?” Beck laughed at his failed attempt.

“I can read you like a book. You don’t need to hide your intentions.”

“Damn it.”

“I’ll prepare the long awaited breakfast tomorrow morning. Be up for 9:00 am. Set an alarm if you have to. I’ll tuck into breakfast with or without you.” You headed over to your bedroom and waved Jooheon goodnight.

“Goodnight! Sleep tight, don’t let the cantilevers bite.”

You went back to react to his really dead architecture joke.

“Get in the bin.” With Beck laughing at this really bad joke, you went back into your room and headed off to bed.

…

Monday morning

“Beck get your ass up its 9!” Typical, he hadn’t moved a single inch for the past minute that his alarm has been going off for.

“Y/N 5 more minutes.”

“5 more minutes and you’ll get no breakfast.”

“Breakfast…BREAKFAST!” Beck jumped out of the bed and flung himself grabbing some clothing on the way straight to do bathroom.

“This guy” You laughed at his reaction.

You left him to get ready and went back to the balcony and poured both of you some rich black tea. You settled in your usual seat and started filling your plate with all the different delicacies you laid on the table earlier on.

“You’ve done it again! I love these Mediterranean breakfasts you make. I need to come here more often.”

“Be my guest. It’s sometimes lonely enjoying a feast alone.”

“I could imagine. Although, that should have changed no?” What was he on about?

“Once you’re gone I’ll be back to having lonely breakfasts.”

“No, I mean you and your new boyfriend. When were you planning on telling me? You’ve been silent all weekend about it- “

“Boyfriend?? In who’s world did you hear that I have a boyfriend?” You used all your strength to not spit out the tea you had just sipped.

“The singer-actor guy? What was his name again? You were making headlines with him all weekend have you not checked your phone at all?”

You leaped back inside and grabbed your phone. No messages. No calls. What? Was this some kind of joke?

“Beck I haven’t got a single notification. Are you taking the piss?”

He grabbed your phone from you and enabled your WIFI. He knew you would switch it off whenever you had important things to do like this weekend. As soon as your phone connected to your router, all sorts of things flooded your phone screen. You took it back off him and read all the headlines.

Love strikes under the full moon

Waves were not the only things crashing that night

GOT7’s Jinyoung and his secret lover

Who could she be?

Secret Girlfriend and Aspiring Actor kicking it off on the Beach

“You’ve got to be kidding me?! Right before an important meeting as well. The company’s image. My image. My parents. How in the hell did this all happen?”

“Y/N sit down. It’s kinda late. You’ll just have to explain everything to whoever asks. Don’t worry about the company’s image, we all know how hardworking and talented you are.”

“Give me a sec. I need to make a call.” Jinyoung must have seen all the news too. You gave him a ring but no answer. He might be thinking that he’ll speak at one point during the leisure centre and you hadn’t found the time to let him know you won’t be in.

“Y/N calm down. Focus on the meeting please. You can sort out whatever this is afterwards.” You sat back down and tried to calm yourself down. Beck was right. You guys had an important meeting to focus on.

“Sorry.”

“Y/N shut up. I don’t want to hear it. Eat up, we have a long day ahead of ourselves.”

You tried to eat something, but it just wouldn’t work. Every mouthful felt like labour. You guys cleared up the table and went to prep for the meeting. You brushed your teeth and took a quick shower. You knew you were ready for this meeting, now it was just time to act on what you knew. You took out a pair of cream shorts alongside a white oversized tank top and a brown belt. You grabbed your nude heals and the gold accessories off your drawers to put on as you left. You had your hair wavey from your twisted bun that you always slept with in and a little mascara, the usual. Beck had loaded your car with all the sheets to pin up for the meeting alongside all the small scale models you had at your house.

You locked your house and ran to your car. Beck was ready in the passenger’s seat running over the minor things on his iPad.

“Have you rung the company to check the room is prepared, refreshments all that jazz.”

“Erm… yeah but there’s apparently loads of paparazzi that security is trying to hold off.” Your head shot towards Beck. As if that was needed.

“Guess we are entering through the back entrance. Call the client at let him know to do the same.”

“On it.” Thank god for Beck.

…

20 minutes later

You were driving past the usual entrance of the company and saw the tons of people that the security was blocking off. In a million years you wouldn’t have thought you’d have paparazzi at your company door.

“Can today get any worse?” You questioned out loud.

“Don’t say that. Just get in through the back, it’ll be over soon.”

Your receptionist let you through the back entrance and you guys moved to the meeting room that was prepped for the meeting.

“The room looks great. Just like how we agreed on.” You smiled at your receptionist.

“The presentation team did a great job. I’ll treat them for a meal.” Beck offered. You agreed with his statement.

“Mr Chan should be here in 30 minutes. Let’s pin up the sheets and bring all the models to this room.” You both left your belongings in the room and went down to the fabrication labs down stairs. To head to fabrication, you guys had to walk past the front entrance. You peaked to see if the people had gone but no. It had gotten worse. There were more people we even bigger cameras. How on earth?

JINYOUNG’S POV

You were right on time for your lesson. You and the kids were waiting at the pool side for Y/N. You kind of felt giddy after what happened on Friday. What stage would you call you and Y/N now? You checked the clock and saw that she was 5 minutes late. This didn’t seem like Y/N, she’s always early. Or has been for the past 2 lessons anyways.

“Woojin, is Miss ever late?” Woojin shook his head no.

Jaehyun heard from his dock and decided to let you know about the news.

“Jinyoung hyung, Y/N has a really important meeting today. She called in to say she won’t be making it for this lesson meaning Max will be taking over for today.”

Max… is taking over? This isn’t going to go well.

“Thanks, Jaehyun.” Jaehyun saluted which is his way of saying ‘no problem’.

You were thinking why Y/N wouldn’t have told you until you realised… the missed call this morning. She tried to get in contact with you, but you weren’t available. Damn it.

“Jaehyun, do you know where Y/N’s company building is at?”

“Yh, it’s the one and only big fancy glass building in the town centre.” She works there? She’s very humble for a CEO.

“Right, I’ll be absent for today. You can let Max know when he does the register. Also, what time is the meeting?”

“It starts at 11:00 am, why did you ask?”

“I’m going to attend.”

Jaehyun started cackling, “Do you think you can just walk into a client meeting? You must be mad. Jinyoung hyung it’s a serious meeting, you can’t just barge in.”

“Fine, I’m going to wait for there then.”

“No can do.” Max was behind you ask he listened to the conversation. You turned around to face Max.

“I can leave if I want.”

“Kids, do we want Jinyoung to leave this lesson? We all want him to stay don’t we?” You couldn’t believe he was going to use the kids as bait for you to stay.

“Yes, Jinyoung oppa please stay!”

“Jinyoung hyung, don’t go!”

The kids started whining, hoping you would stay for the lesson. He used his weapons well; you couldn’t break the kids’ hearts especially when you knew how much Y/N cares for the kids. You were gonna stay for her sake.

You knelt down to the kids and gave them a smile, “Fine, I’ll stay.”

You gave a glance to Max and hopefully you both sided with getting through this lesson without any disruptions. And so, the lesson commenced.

“We will be doing a test today.”

“A test?”, Hyungwon gulped, “But Miss didn’t mention a test last week?”

“Well Hyungwon, this is a surprise test. I’ll be marking everyone on how well they perform on the things Miss taught in the past 2 weeks.” This guy is doing this on purpose.

“How will you be marking us?” You spoke up.

“3 columns. Speed. Technique. A race. The place you come in the race will determine how many points you get for the ‘race’ column.”

“I’m gonna beat you all.” Woojin was already hyped to get the highest score. You would have probably been as excited as Woojin if the teacher was different.

“Right, we will be starting with Technique. I’ll be going off the register order so line up in that order and I’ll be testing your technique swimming front stroke.” You lined up along with the kids. You were obviously last.

Max got to you. You had a feeling he was gonna try and do everything to give you a bad mark. You remembered all the things Y/N had taught you and starting swimming to the area Max marked. You hated that this man was good at something you weren’t. Knowing he was ahead in something gave him more say and material on you.

“I feel sad for Y/N,” You waited for him to continue to see what he meant, “For having such a crap student.” He jotted down a fat 0 next to your name under the technique column. Jaehyun heard from his dock the comment Max had made and made eye contact with you. He was pleading for you to not react to Max’s words since that was exactly what he wanted to do. You clenched your fists and took a deep breath. You weren’t gonna lose this easily.

“I feel sad for Y/N too. Different reason though.” You gave Max a dirty look so he got the idea that you were referring to him in some way.

“Max hyung, are we moving onto speed now?” Woojin separated both of your focusses onto him.

“Yes Woojin-ah, get ready I’ll be timing you guys. You all have to swim in whichever style you want from one end to another.”

“Get to the side.” Max turned his face back to you and spoke in a demanding tone. He was really grinding your gears. This was going to be a long hour.

Y/N’S POV

“Good morning Mr Chan. I hope your flight yesterday was well.” You shook Mr Chan’s hand as he took his seat in the meeting room.

“Good Morning Miss Y/L/N and Mr Longing. I arrived without any problems. I got some rest too. All in all, I’m ready for today’s meeting.”

“Agreed, Mr Chan. I’ll begin with the site analysis and our response with our design.” You and Beck agreed for Beck to start the meeting and then you to end it.

“So, as you may have heard one of the plots of land were taken out of our hands. There was some complications with the landowners, but we decided that one plot of land was enough to fulfil the criteria of an eco-hotel.” With that Beck continued with explaining the new updates on the hotel design after the land issue.

“Mr Chan, the maquettes and models are laid out in the order of development. This is how the overall design developed into the final result. The 3D printed large model at the end is the final version of the hotel in a simple representation of the surrounding area around it.” You moved towards the model and showed Mr Chan where the sun would be travelling throughout the day. You brought along all the hand drawings from the past couple days too to show what each individual room would look like from all angles.

“These look amazing. I’m really thankful for the models and the drawings, they give a really good idea of what the final outcome will look like.” You and Beck looked at each other and gave a smile. All the hard work you both had put on for the past couple days had come through.

“Although, I wanted to ask one thing.” You diverted your attention to Mr Chan.

“Yes, Mr Chan go ahead.” You were nervous from his sudden question. You were sure you and Beck hadn’t missed out on any information.

“It hasn’t got to do with the project.”

“What exactly are you referring to Mr Chan?”

“You, Miss Y/L/N.” You looked up at Beck. What could Mr Chan want to know about you?

“Go ahead, Mr Chan. I’m listening.” If you were honest, you weren’t feeling well. You started breathing heavier than usual scared of what Mr Chan was going to ask.

“The paparazzi’s at the front door. Why are they here?” Fuck. This should have been something you should have thought about earlier on. You looked at Beck for help. You had no answer to give.

“That wasn’t Miss Y/L/N, Mr Chan. There has been a misunderstanding. The news reports are still speculating who the person is and Miss Y/L/N has just been mistaken for the girl that the actor was with. As you may have seen the photographs were taken at night, so it is hard to tell who it is, as expected.” Beck covered up for you.

“I see… and Miss Y/L/N what do you plan on doing about the news.”

“I’m aiming to get in contact with the actor’s agency to speak up and deny allegations about my involvement since that is the truth. I’ll also be holding a conference soon to news outlets about the situation. I don’t want anything like this to throw dirt under our company’s name.”

“I thought it was you Miss,” Is he being serious?, “I was going to congratulate you on your new relationship. That was the reason for the flowers. You’re also human. I thought you were taking a step forward in your person life. I know about how popular you are among fellow architects, for your work and for you too.” Me? Popular among architects? Step forward in my person life? Can life stop throwing new surprises nowadays, you were happy with your boring life.

“Mr Chan.” Beck addressed your client.

“We thought you would be disappointed about the truth. If that is the case I’d like to firstly apologise for what I just said. I didn’t mean to lie Mr Chan, but we didn’t want anything to cause you to- “

“It’s fine Mr Longing. Congratulations Miss Y/L/N. It’s really nice to see the new generation finding love. I’m sure you have found the right person for you.”

“Mr Chan, I appreciate your comments although it’s a little more complicated than that. We are not exactly dating or haven’t exactly clarified it between ourselves.” You struggled to keep eye contact with your client at this rate. Beck eyed you knowing you could have just suggested that you had a fling days before an important meeting.

“I’m sure you guys will even end up getting married one day. I sensed it when I saw your photos side by side.” You just smiled at Mr Chan’s observations.

“I hope whatever is best for the both of us is what happens.” Mr Chan agreed and focussed back on the project.

“Was there anything else you’d like to ask Mr Chan?” Beck wanted to make sure Mr Chan was completely clear of the new changes in order to process the build.

“Can I decide on which trees and floors to have planted in the hotel? I know the botanic designers tend to do so.”

“Of course, Mr Chan. As long as the greenery you choose passes the climate test meaning they’ll stay alive in Jinhae’s weather conditions, you can choose which ones we decorate the hotel with.”

“Great, that marks the end of the meeting. You guys have done an outstanding job. Better than what I expected. What’s the estimated date of completion?”

“If everything goes well, the hotel should be completely finished and ready for service for the month of March 2022.”

Mr Chan clapped in happiness. You were happy to have made your extremely important client over the moon.

“I’d like to take you guys out for dinner. I hope you guys made sure the rest of your days are free-“

You were getting a call from Jooheon. You never get calls from Jooheon during meetings, he knows not to disturb unless it’s an emergency.

“Mr Chan, could I please take this call?”

“Sure, go ahead. Me and Mr Longing will decide on where to eat.” You smiled and left the meeting room and picked up the call.

“Jooheon, what is it?”

“Y/N.. I-“

“Jooheon please tell me. Did something happen?”

“Jinyoung…He’s in the- “

“The what Jooheon can you just say it already?”

“The hospital.”

“HOSPITAL?!?”

---

Oooooo… the suspense. I haven’t tried these sorts of endings before, so I wanted to give it a shot. I want to leave it up to you guys for now to imagine what may have happened. Until the next episode, see you! Next episode will be extraordinary, you can count on me.

writer-nim x

[tehrevving]

Rambling

I dunno if anyone’s interested but I just smashed out a brainstorm/draft 0 of a piece and I figured I’d share it here, you know, if anyone wanted to get some insight as to how my twisted mind works, or something, I dunno.

Anyway. When I started writing this I didn’t know where I was going with it apart from Devil Trigger Cock.... and well I guess now I do. lol.  This is my first pass, it has all my typos and probably doesn’t make much sense. It’s not coherant, it jumps around and it’s probably 5 rewrites away from being finished, the dialogue doesn’t have tags etc but, here it is if you wanna read. Enjoy :D

Song: https://open.spotify.com/track/33l1r0nOyFVOANL6gqmA00?si=_NxH7iV7RImRGw56g_9TKA

It was a lazy day at Devil May Cry. Dante had been sprawled out over the length of the couch, arm over his eyes, pretending to nap and wasting the day away.

 You sat up, moving back down his body until your hips were over his. He let out a soft groan as you sat down, you could feel his hardness through his pants pressing against you.

 “Don’t you think I’ve been such a good girl lately Dante?”

He lifted his head up to look at you.

 “And, good girls should get rewarded, don’t you think?”

 He sighed, “there’s always a catch with you.”

 “Do you know what we haven’t done in a while?”

 “hmm?” he intones, rising up at the end in question. He’s intrigued now, sitting up silghtly so there’s less strain on his neck.

 “What you haven’t done in a while.”

 You arch your back and see the way his eyes follow the curve of your form. You rock your hips as you settle back down and watch as his eye flutter shit for a moment before opening.

 “Well, you know what to do sweetheart.”

 You lean forward to kiss him again. His hips move impatiently, wanting friction tht youre simply too small to provide.

    You hold his big cock in your hands. Fingers wrapped around the base and pulling it towards your mouth. You press kitten licks to the sensitive spot jst underneath the big head while he squirms underneath you.

 “Danteeee~,” you whine at him.

 “Fine. Fine.”

 There’s a rush of energy, it moves through the room and concentrates between your fingers. You watch as the coverted object in front of you glows white with light, with a scorching sort of heat.

 In his Devil trigger, his normal one anyway, his cock doesn’t get much longer. Maybe another inch or so, he’s long enough already that it’s tricky to notice but the girth of it practically doubles. A long, fat cock, the skin a dark sort of brown tinged with veins that glow orange red and pulse. It’s ribbed and segmented all the way up, like it’s covered in scales. With a thick blunted head and heavy balls that hang low.

  It doesn’t take much for him to come when he’s like this. His devil cock is sensitive. Each orgasm makes it more sensitive, it comes a lot and often, and you’ve never seen it get soft. Not that you’ve ever tried, Dante always gies up before that point. Eventually his body gives out and his cock fades back into human form.

 “Babe,” he says as you take him as far between your lips as you can. It’s not much.

 You know it’s madness to try and take him without any prep, not like this.

 He’s out of it, but not enough that he’s not aware. His hands are tight on your hips in warning. The head of him lines up with you and he growls, a deep thing that rumlbles in his chest. Your legs are shaking as you try to hold yourself stretched up.

 “Nope,” he says, voice slightly distorted. He pulls you off him, not that you were really on him to start with. He lifts you effortlressly with both hands and pulls you until you’re resting your thighs on either side of his face.

 //fingers and then a demon tongue

  By the time Dante releases you, you’re shaking too much to stay upright.

 You look down to see his cock absolutely glistening with precome, a large pool of it on his skin.

 He sits up and plls you to his chest. He’s sticky and sweaty, but so are you.

 He holds you steady, gives you support because you don’t have any yourself.  You’re only human, he probably did too much, but you’ve got this fire in your eyes even though your body is almost limp in his arms.

 You cry out as the head of his thick cock, impossibly warm starts to press against your entrance. It’s so wet there, from your own slick, Dante’s thick demon saliva and the liquid pouring from his cock. It goes in this time. You feel his nails turn to points against your hips as his cock begins to sink inside of you. You cry out and claw at his shoulders, trying to find purchase on anything, the stitching on his shirt groaning.

 You’re incoherent and beathing heavily by the time he’s fully seated inside of you. Everything burns with this pleasure you can hardly stand.

 “You did it. Such a good girl,” he praises you. His voice gruff and distorted, he’s breathing hard, struggling to hold himself back. His hand threads through your heair and pulls it up to you’re looking at him.

 “Are you okay?” There’s concern in his eyes.

 You nod.

 He looks down at you like he doesn’t believe you.

 “Dante,” you whisper. “Please.”

 “Fuck, you’re so fucking tight.”

    You try to rock on him but between his large thighs and how much of him is fucking inside of you right now, it’s almost impossible.

 You reach down a hand over your belly while he thrusts, and that’s when you feel it.

 You take his hand, place it on your skin and try desperately to rock your hips so he can fele it.

 It triggers something primal inside of him. His eyes flashing red, flashing dark. Dante growls and it’s inhuman, it looks like his skin starts to tremble, and you wonder if he’s going to fully trigger.

 He lifts you up and pushes you back util you’re lying on your back on the couch. He’s on his knees, your legs around his hips. The bulge in your skin is larger here, you can see it. You lean up to watch it, and you can see his eyes are locked on it too.

 He pulls his hips back and it shifts, you throw your head back and cry out at the feel of it. The pleasure. The tight rush as your body grips his cock, not wanting to let it go.

 His whole body is vibrating now, claws digging into your hips. You’re bleeds from the pricks of his nails claws now, dripping down on to the couch.

 You come and you scream his name.

 There’s an unholy light, an impossible heat. You scream louder as something change sinside of you. You think the pressure might split you in half, it’s so big. Like his cock has tripled in size, maybe more. There’s a roar, something that shakes the very core of your being, shakes the room.

 Your eyes water from the heat, you can hardly see through them.

   This huge demon growls your name and swears as its fucking giant cock rearranges your insides as it moves. It’s more like it’s pushing and pulling your insides around it than it is thrusting itself in and out. It’s ridged everywhere, catching on your body. The pleasure is unbearable, the bulge in your stomach even larger now.

 You pass out from the heat, from the vibrating inside your skull as the creature comes inside of you.

 You wake up in pain, to a blurry, swearing Dante standing over you.

 Your body aches, there’s not a part of you that doesn’t hurt. Your skin feels like ribbons, like it’s been clawed away on your hips and your thighs. There’s an unbearable burn between your legs, that seems to stretch all the way up your body.

 You groan and even that hurts, like your lungs are bruised.

 The couch cushions are shredded underneath you.

 Your vision comes lsightly more in focus, but you can’t move

 There’s Dante, pushing something foul and chewy into your mouth and begging for you to swallow.

 You try your best, pushing the gross mush down your throat. You feel instantly better and worse at the same time. The pain starts to recede, but it just leaves a numb throbbing that’s almost worse.

   Dante helps you to sit up and there’s a gush of something. You look down to see a huge puddle of dark liquid between your legs. And then you notice that the couch is scorched black, the walls and floor are scortched black. There’s charcoal on the roof. You groan as your neck protests at the action of moving.

 “Don’t move,” says Dante, “just rest.”

 “What the fuck? Happened?”

 “I lost control,”

 “Lost?”

 “Lost, lost control.”

 You see a flash of a huge demon in your minds eye, glowing orange and red. Your body moves to flinch back but Dante’s there to hold you still.

[damienthepious]

hey, Lizard Kissin’ Tuesday Crew. we’re finally back on real, actual Second Citadel content, huh? But. here’s the thing. not even that can put me off my bullshit. How do y’all feel about a chapter two?

Scattered On My Shore (Chapter 2)

[Ch 1] [ao3] [Ch 3] [Ch 4] [Ch 5] [Ch 6] [Ch 7] [Ch 8] [Ch 9] [Ch 10] [Ch 11] [Ch 12] [Ch 13] [Ch 14] [Ch 15] [Ch 16] [Ch 17] [Ch 18] [Ch 19]

Fandom: The Penumbra Podcast

Relationship: Lord Arum/Sir Damien/Rilla, Sir Damien/Rilla

Characters: Rilla, Lord Arum, Sir Damien

Additional Tags: Second Citadel, Lizard Kissin’ Tuesday, Pre-Relationship, (for the three of them. it’s established r/d), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Injury, Injury Recovery,  Hurt/Comfort,  (this will also be), Enemies to Lovers, (for damien and arum eventually lol)

Fic Summary: Strange things wash up out of the lake near Rilla’s hut, on occasion. But this monster… this monster is certainly the strangest.

Chapter Summary: The monster should be on the mend. There are, however, one or two complications.

Chapter Notes: This chapter deals with a lot of medical talk, there's some mention of blood and more specific descriptions of injury, and description of something close to surgery. There is also some talk in this that hints at some mild suicidal ideation, so if you’re sensitive to that tread with caution. Also if anyone with any knowledge of actual real life medical stuff reads this i am desperately sorry, i know virtually nothing. Forgive me for my nonsense.

~

It’s difficult to really stabilize the monster. And of course it is- Rilla is essentially paddling with her hands over here, she’s reduced to guesswork (she hates guesswork) and trial and error (which is slightly less irritating, but it’s certainly too goddamn risky when it comes to trying to save a life) and his body is already so strange that it’s hard to figure out what’s actually damage and what’s just inherent to him.

One of his four (four) wrists is broken, but she notices that late because his wrists turn so strangely in the first place (there must be a purpose to that; maybe he’s partially arboreal? That sort of range of motion would be useful for- no, focus, focus, Rilla-) and she doesn’t catch the jagged slackness of one among the four until he winces through trying to move it during one of his rare moments of consciousness.

That, too, is hit and miss, how aware he is at any given moment. It’s difficult to find a sedative that works- she doesn’t know much about lizard sedation, let alone pseudo-lizard-snake-bug-dragon (potentially ashdragon, specifically) sedation, and he wakes at unexpected moments. Unexpected, and he is often still near-delirious when he rouses, still snapping ineffectually with his eyes rolling in instinctive panic and/or pain. Very, very occasionally he comes around to lucid, or close to lucid, and then he always fixes her with that frightened, suspicious violet gaze.

She tries to use those opportunities when they arise. If he can answer questions about his pain, she can at least get a better idea of what still needs mending. Or- she would get a better idea, if the stubborn ass would answer any of her questions without complaining or deflecting or, yet again, complaining.

“Your attention is both unwanted and unneeded, little human, and the very instant that I- ha,” he bursts into a whine, his throat whirring sharply as he pants, lifting a clawed hand to press weakly at his midsection.

“That one still hurts, then?”

“All of it h-hurts, you idiot.”

“But the pain there is sharper? More acute?”

He hisses, then snaps his teeth ineffectually in her direction. “I- I will not be patronized,” he says in a snarl, and Rilla rolls her eyes and gently finishes re-wrapping his wrist.

“Okay, okay,” she agrees gently. “Now, don’t move that any more than you have to, understood?”

Terrible patient. Just- abysmally bad.

Though, oddly, he hasn’t made any move to actually hurt her.

She had been expecting things to get fairly bad on that front, if she’s being honest. Right at the start, when he was barely, barely conscious, like absolutely tongue-lolling out of it, she obviously wasn’t worried about attack beyond just accidentally catching herself on his limp claws.

But even as he comes more aware, even as he complains bitterly and tries, with unpredictable frequency and an utter lack of success or self-preservation, to slip from his bed and towards either the door or the window, he hasn’t tried to hurt her. He hasn’t tried to bite, though he snaps his teeth at her pretty much every time he’s awake. He hasn’t tried to claw her, though he pushes her hands away with a scowl when he’s lucid enough to do so.

It’s just odd, honestly. Not that she’s complaining. She’d rather not have to don falconer’s gloves just to redress his broken wrist or to check his pulse.

“I do not need to be mmf-”

He cuts off as she presses the cup against his mouth, burying her smile in a stubborn frown.

“You can barely lift your arms, let alone a glass. Drink. I don’t care if you’re embarrassed, you need to hydrate. Losing blood is no joke.”

“And certainly you care about my hydration,” he says with a sneer, his teeth clinking against the clay. “You expect me to believe-”

“I expect you to believe that I’ve barely gotten any sleep in the last two days trying to keep you from dying, and I believe that you’re going to drink from this damned cup right now, yeah, actually.” She blows her frown out like a candle and smiles bright and dangerous instead. “Drink. Now. And shut up.”

He sneers, but she presses the cup against his mouth again and his tongue flicks out and he blinks, and she sees the moment the big stubborn idiot realizes how thirsty he is, and then with very, very bad grace he lets her tip the cup until he can take a few long, slow swallows, his entire frame sagging in relief. He sighs when the cup is drained, and she can tell that he’s drained, too. More tired than she expects, at this point, but honestly it’s hard to tell with a monster. He’s half-dozing again before she’s lowered the cup.

He doesn’t tell her that he’s cold. That one is infuriating, actually. Might have something to do with the excessive fatigue, which she has to fold into her theories and speculations. She should have guessed, too, from the way he always unconsciously seems to lean into her touch. He gets furious when he notices himself doing so, and she’d been distracted from the actual possible causes of that by the way his snout wrinkles when he’s embarrassed. It’s- almost cute, in a weird sort of way.

Or it would be, if his frill didn’t try to flare when he’s embarrassed, too. It’s still torn, and it’s a very difficult part of the lizard to bandage, so every time he moves it without meaning to (partially conscious motion, or at least partially conscious control- he can move it at will, she thinks, but it also moves reactively, maybe in a similar way to blinking when startled), he exacerbates the edges of the tears, delays the progress of his recovery at least in that one small way for that much longer.

The cold, though: she notes his subconscious leaning towards her own skin, at first thinks that’s just some natural, biological response, and of course she’s warmer than him and she assumes that warmth would be soothing for a lizard-type creature. She notes the way he tenses when the sheets of the cot are pulled away from him for the purpose of checking his injuries and redressing, and she assumes mostly that it’s just more of the embarrassment that he seems so prone to, more than anything. She puts the pieces together when he sighs in a rather dramatically satisfied way as she’s pulling the sheets back over him, though, and she blinks down as he eyes her suspiciously.

“Wait- hang on. Have you been cold this whole time?”

He frowns, ducking his head and burying his chin in the thin cloth. “Does it matter?”

Her mouth hangs open, too shocked by the stupidity of the question to even answer for a long moment. A really, really long moment, actually. She stands up, and she leaves the room before the words find her again, because obviously, obviously-

She comes back with an armful of covers and quilts and he eyes her in alarm as she clomps back to the bedside and dumps the entire pile onto the cot, onto his legs, where her point will be made without the added gentle weight potentially pressing on his injuries.

“There,” she says, frowning. “Saints, I could have warmed you up ages ago if you only told me, you idiot.” She reaches into the pile and starts rearranging, layering the covers over him with systematic attention, the softer sheets lower and closer to him, the warmer heat-trapping layers on top.

“You- little doctor do you really believe this necessary?”

“If you’re cold it could be exacerbating your lethargy, which could interfere with your recovery,” she says with sharp look. “Or, for all I know, it could be masking other symptoms. Next time, if something hurts or if there’s a way I can make you more comfortable, tell me.”

She pokes him in the tip of his snout lightly to emphasize her words, and he snarls automatically though his expression is more sheer surprise than anything, and he looks like he’s already settling into the heat, drifting sleepily down.

“I- I-”

“Don’t get embarrassed, don’t get all haughty, just ask. That’s what I’m here for. I can’t help you if you don’t let me.”

“Could have fooled me,” he mutters, and she flicks him in the snout again. He- laughs, then, a breathy and stunned sort of nose, before he lifts a clumsy hand to rub the offended point. “You are absurd,” he says, and he sounds a little impressed.

“And you,” she says smugly, “aren’t cold anymore.”

Eventually, after every injury she’s certain of is at least somewhat accounted for, wrapped, disinfected, dealt with, she starts to feel like it’s just a game of waiting for his body to start to fix itself-

But days later, he doesn’t seem to be improving. Even when he comes out of the sedation, his fatigue and his pain are still severe, and it almost seems like he’s more confused than before just after waking. His breathing continues to grow more shallow, more labored, and his arms have taken to wracking spasms. It was just rare, at first, but the frequency is increasing. Muscle spasms, difficulty breathing, lethargy and confusion-

Most troubling: his scales are developing patches of sickly purplish red. Subtle, at first, and difficult to notice among the rest of his dark green and black mottling, but once she notices the first one slowly discoloring his upper left pectoral, she notices the rest fairly soon.

Symptoms suggest a likely cause of infection. Possibly septicemia. Potentially lethal, when he should, by rights, be on the mend.

Complication regarding that potential diagnosis: Rilla has already started the monster on antibiotics specifically to combat a burgeoning infection in one of the scrapes on his arm, one that was pretty wretched before she got her hands on it. So, if any of his other injuries managed to get infected before she had the chance to clean and wrap them, her treatments should already be mitigating it. This, however, is progressing instead of healing.

Which means that Rilla must have missed something.

Obviously that prospect is infuriating, but Rilla’s not going to deny facts just because they’re inconvenient. Somewhere, somehow, she made a mistake. She’ll have to fix that mistake if she’s going to make any of this better.

She is systematic. She redresses his wounds, carefully noting the progression of his recovery with each (to a one: slow), looking for evidence of discoloration, of odd smells or discharge, looking for anything at all more amiss than just the injuries themselves, anything that might prove to be the cause of the lizard’s lack of progress.

(He hasn’t given up. She knows that, at least. Knows that isn’t a possible cause. For all his complaints and sarcastic pleas for her to just end his humiliation, he is struggling towards life with a fervor, she can see it. There’s something in his eyes- some fire, maybe, and Rilla knows that he hasn’t given up. He hasn’t- and she won’t either.)

One of the injuries on his midsection, a sloppy claw wound or possibly a bite from a strange angle, catches her attention. His progress is slow all around, but this one- it almost looks worse that it did when she dressed it. The edges haven’t even begun to knit back together, and it hasn’t quite stopped bleeding in a slow, sullen sort of way.

While he’s out cold, she examines the area more closely, pressing incredibly careful fingers around the wound, taking samples of the blood to compare to others she’s taken in the last few days, trying to decide if she can actually distinguish necrotic scales from just damaged ones with her current base of knowledge, but when she’s probing with her fingers she feels-

Something. She doesn’t want to press any harder than it takes just to feel the shape, but there is definitely something very wrong in this particular injury. Something hard, and out of place. A piece of broken rib, maybe? No- no she doesn’t think it’s that. Maybe something more malicious- her brain leaps to arrowhead but it’s not that kind of wound, of course. Speculation is rarely helpful, though, and she knows that if she wants this injury (and hopefully the rest) to actually begin to improve, she’s going to have to-

Well. It’s essentially going to be surgery.

The next time he wakes, he’s even weaker. She can tell by the way the nictitating membranes stay flipped over his eyes defensively, fogging his bright violet back to a soft, concerning lavender. By the way the hand he lifts to bat at her misses her wrist entirely. By the way he doesn’t even manage to pretend not to lean his cheek into her palm when she cups his face to make him look at her.

“Wh… human, what are you…”

“I know you don’t want to talk about what happened to you,” she says, voice firm but gentle, and after a moment he tenses. “I’m not going to ask, don’t worry, but I do need to ask-”

“Not going to- to tell you anything-”

“Is there any chance that whatever attacked you could have left something behind in one of your wounds? The tip of a claw, or a tooth, or horn? Anything like that?”

His brow furrows, and he finally seems to focus on her fully, his foggy eyes flicking between her own. “It… it is possible, human, why-”

“Is there any chance that there might be a poison or toxin involved as well?”

The membranes slide away from his eyes, finally, and he stares at her with narrowed violet diamonds as he pulls his face away from her hand. “Yes,” he says. “Yes, that is possible.” He inhales deeply, and the breath shakes out of him. “This protracted weakness. You believe-”

“It appears that there’s some foreign object stuck in one of your wounds, and you’re showing signs of infection or something worse,” she says, matter-of-fact. “I suspect it’s the cause of why you’ve been improving so slowly, and why it’s seemed like you’re about to start a backslide.”

“A foreign… object,” he repeats in a hiss. “Excellent. My injuries were… obviously not extensive enough already.”

“The point is,” Rilla says, sighing, “that I think you’re going to continue to deteriorate, unless the object is removed.”

He stares at her, blinks slowly, then raises one ridged eyebrow.

“Then it seems… your path is clear, does it not?” He pauses. “Unless, perhaps, this is precisely the excuse you were searching for, to allow the monster to die with as little effort-”

“Don’t be an ass,” she says, quiet but sharp. “I’ve been treating you, and that started when you were barely alive, let alone conscious. Obviously I didn’t ask permission for any of that. I couldn’t. But this- this is gonna be surgery. I’ll have to sedate you, and anything like that- there’s always a risk of something going wrong. And it- it’s different, now. You’re awake. You know what’s going on. You know that I’m not trying to hurt you.”

He scoffs, but he doesn’t interrupt.

“I can ask, this time. If I don’t try to remove it, you’ll probably get worse, but there’s also a chance that trying to remove it could… could go wrong. So,” she straightens her spine, curls her lip into a wry half-smile, and meets the monster’s eye. “Do you want me to try? If you decide not to, I can- I can try more aggressive pharmaceutical methods, but to be entirely honest I’m not optimistic that there’s anything I can change on that front that will make a difference, and-”

“Wh-what are you doing?”

Rilla blinks, watching the suspicious twisting of his face. “What do you mean?”

“Asking, human, what are you asking for? Why pretend as if you care about the input of a monster?”

“Be… because I do?”

He scoffs again. “Ridiculous. Don’t be absurd, if you think you can manipulate me into-”

“Hey, hey-” she reaches out, her fingers just barely, barely brushing the scales of his shoulder and startling him into a wordless hiss. “Don’t work yourself up. You’re already exhausted, you don’t want to make yourself even more tired.”

“I am tired, human, of you pretending as if-”

“I have a name, you know.”

He flinches, lips pressing together as he glares at her sulkily. “I do not care. And I do not care what you do with me, either. I will likely die either way, so I may as well leave it in the hands of the universe, even if the universe is acting through such absurd means.”

Rilla frowns, her heart pulling a little. “I’m not going to let you die. Not if I can do anything about it. Please, just- tell me what you want me to do.”

He clenches his jaw tight, still frowning and not quite looking at her. “I told you. Do as you like.”

“No. No, that's not how this is going to work.” She frowns, brow furrowing stubbornly, and she meets his sharp eyes until he quails, glancing away. “What do you want?”

He swallows, ducks his head, and she can see the turning of the gears in his head for a long moment.

“I… I would rather die quick than slow, little human. If you believe there is some poison in me, and the attempt to remove it may destroy me, I would rather be destroyed in the attempt than in some painful, protracted helplessness.” He pauses, then aims his sharp, tired eyes up at her again. “There. You have your answer. Act as you will.”

“Okay,” Rilla says, and then she sighs. “Okay. That- honestly I’m glad you feel that way. And- and it’ll be better if we do this sooner rather than later. I’ll have to prepare a little bit, but- is that okay?”

“I would rather not waste time putting it off, yes,” he agrees in a drawl, looking away again.

“I’ve-” Rilla pauses. “I’ve been meaning to ask. It- I’ve been feeling pretty damn rude, actually, just- what’s your name?”

He blinks, eyes wide with something like panic. “What?”

“Your name. I’m not just going to call you monster if there’s something else I should be calling you. And-”

And this might be the last chance she has, to ask. If things go wrong.

She can see the moment he realizes her thoughts, the morbidity of them, and something like resignation slips into his expression. Not exactly the desired effect. She wishes he didn’t seem so agreeable to the concept of dying, but-

“Fine. Fine, if you care so very much. I am Lord Arum, he who rules the Swamp of Titan’s Blooms. If you must call me anything, you may call me that.”

“Lord, huh?”

“Indeed,” he hisses, narrowing his eyes.

“Seems pretty formal, considering.”

“Indeed,” he repeats, more snarl in his tone, and she laughs.

“Okay, okay, formal, then. You may call me Amaryllis of Exile, oh Lord of the Swamp. Pleasure to formally meet you.”

His frown deepens. “Pleasure,” he hisses under his breath with a scoff. “Now. May we get this done? If you are so very concerned with my well-being as you claim, certainly you should not delay.”

“Yeah,” she says with a sigh, and then she stands. “Yeah, I know. If you’re ready, I can put you under.”

“As ready as I expect I will be,” he mutters as he watches her cross the room to fetch the sedative.

It’s a little unsettling, actually, how close he watches her as she draws the proper dose into the syringe, as she returns to the side of his cot.

“Okay,” she says, quiet with his eyes on her. “Ready, Arum?”

He scowls at his name in her voice, at the distinct lack of his title, maybe. He still nods, though, after a moment. “Do as you will, human.”

“I’ll do everything I can,” Rilla says, and he closes his eyes even before she injects him with the sedative. “Hang in there for me, okay?”

“As if I have a choice,” Arum says, and he must have already been only hanging on to the waking world with the tips of his claws, because he barely makes it through the sentence before his head slumps to the side, his breaths evening out.

Rilla takes a deep breath, stares down at the monster in her care, and then she turns to prepare what she’ll need to get this job done.

~

Rilla is so utterly focused on the monster beneath her hands that she does not register the noise in her front room. She hears it: the familiar creak of her door, the noises of footsteps approaching, but her eyes are fixed on the injury that is her current dilemma, fixed on the instrument she is using so very, very delicately to try to pull what her revised estimate assumes must be a broken piece of talon from between this monster’s ribs.

She does not register the noise. She doesn’t even register the much closer noises, the familiar voice, until there is a light knocking at the door to her exam room.

Even then she barely understands, through the buzz of her exhausted focus. She’s so close, she can feel the edges of the curved piece of sharpness that’s pierced him, and if she can only get the angle of her tool just right, if she can only get a little bit of grip, she’ll be able to pull it out. This is the source of the infection; Rilla is sure of that. Poisoned talons or envenomed fang, a tip left behind, bleeding more and more tired pain through his body. If she can just get it out, her other treatments will finally have the chance to make an impact, will finally be afforded the foothold they need to really help him.

The knock comes again, and Rilla mutters something wordless under her breath and she absolutely can’t pull her eyes away. She almost has it. Almost. The blood is making everything slippery but she can see a darker shade among it too and she needs to get this out of him, she just needs to, and she’s almost there-

The door opens. It was not locked.

“Rilla, my heart, you failed to answer and I-”

Rilla feels a very distant twinge of worry, but she’s still so damned close and she can swear she feels her tool catch a grip, just barely. She can’t afford to lose her focus, not now-

“A monster.” Damien’s voice is… utterly devoid of inflection. “Rilla- my Amaryllis- remove yourself from that creature and I shall resolve the situation in an instant-”

“’n the middle of something, Damien,” she mutters, and there is sweat on her forehead and she can’t pull her eyes away, not for him and not for anything. “Outta my exam room now.”

“That is a monster,” Damien repeats, and now there is a tone in his words. Dark, terrified, furious. With her? She can’t tell. Doesn’t really care at the moment, if she’s being honest. “Move away from it and I shall slay it for you.”

“Don’t you dare,” Rilla growls, and her hair must have come loose from her braid because wisps are falling in front of her face and she really, really doesn’t have time for this right now. The tool in her hand catches against an edge, pulls, and she feels the curve of the foreign object between Arum's ribs move, just slightly. “Almost- almost got it, c’mon c’mon c’mon-”

“Rilla before it wakes, before it sets upon you-”

“Don’t be stupid,” she manages. “Knocked him out for this. Obviously. Otherwise the pain’d be- too much. He’s not gonna wake up. Probably not for hours. Shut up and let me focus.”

“Rilla that is a monster-”

“Damien,” Rilla snaps, sharp and harsh and unquestionable, and when her eyes finally jerk towards him Damien’s spine stiffens, his eyes going wide. “I heard you the first time. You think I don’t know this is a monster?” She scoffs, and her throat hurts with the effort of not absolutely screaming at him. “What I am doing, Damien, right at this moment, is incredibly delicate. You are going to leave this room- no, don’t you dare interrupt me, I am talking right now. You are going to leave this room and wait outside. When I am done, and not a moment sooner, I am going to come and join you, and then we are going to have a conversation about him. About this.”

“Rilla-”

“I said that all as nicely as I am physically able, right now. If you make me repeat myself, Damien, I’m not going to get any nicer. Get out. Now.”

He opens his mouth, but she turns away, refocusing back on the task at hand. The task literally, literally in her hands right now. Her grip on the talon is miraculously maintained. Somehow it hasn’t slipped away entirely, or slipped deeper. She delicately, delicately starts to maneuver the object, and if she angles it just right she should be able to slip it right out without scraping the business end of the thing against anything else inside him- without doing any further damage. Removal of something like this is dangerous and delicate and-

And Rilla barely hears it, when the door clicks shut behind Damien again.

She almost has it. Almost.

She twists her wrist. She bites her lip hard enough that it might bleed. She holds her breath and twists and pulls so, so gently-

The small black curve of a broken talon (or, possibly, fang) slips out from between his ribs with not an ounce of fanfare. It barely looks big enough to worry if stuck in the sole of a decent boot. It doesn’t even have the courtesy to dramatically drip black poison. But-

It’s the source of so much of Arum’s pain, and now Rilla has pulled it from him.

Now she can really, really start to help him.

… if she can convince Damien not to kill him, first.

[->]

[y-not-loki]

“What do you think? Is purple my color?” Loki (can have a ship or no ships, I just wanna see Loki going clothes shopping lol)

HEEEEEELL YEEAAAAAAHHHHH. SOMEONE FREAKIN’ ASKED ME TO WRITE SOMETHING THAT’S OUT OF A WRITING CHALLENGE, EVEN THO I GOT SHIT I NEED TO WORK ON FOR WRITING CHALLENGES.

This is gonna be as short, sweet and sassy as I can make it, because I’m gonna go a mix of platonic/romantic and make Loki and Reader be those two people you think would make a great couple, but refuse to say anything on that matter.

Made a moodboard as well (in case it was for a moodboard not an imagine).

Anyway, I’m not going to use my usual layout for one-shots, but I will have warnings.

Warnings: Some swearing??? That’s about it. Maybe Loki getting pissed off enough to think up some nice bodily harm for a few store clerks who try to help.

“What do you think? Is purple my colour?” (Y/N) whirled around to see Loki in a purple suit, with a black tie and white under-shirt. Or whatever those things were. It fit perfectly, outlining that perfect, slim triangular form of Loki’s midsection and his toned legs.

Which was not good for (Y/N). She couldn’t have him out-shining him.

“Yeah, it looks good.” She responded, distractedly. before pulling out a matching purple dress that she grabbed before Loki (the diva he truly was when clothes shopping) dragged her off to find the changing rooms - “Surely, even if it is inferior to the Asgardian market places, it has changing stalls for privacy” “Lokiiiiiiiiii, at least let me-” “I’ll have none of that, this shopping trip is about me, and it will remain about me.” - and it may be true that it was about Loki, because Stark decided that it would be good for publicity if Loki made an appearance and actually behaved, so (Y/N) was tasked with the job of keeping him on track as they had been inseparable from day one.

Luckily, Loki liked to appear smart and well-dressed, so it wasn’t that difficult for him to get side-tracked with the suits.

Even if it was meant to be about him, (Y/N) needed new dresses, and she would definitely not have Loki of all people outshine her on the red carpet and at whatever gala or party Tony decided to throw.

It was a common, unsaid, competition between Loki and (Y/N), both wanting to outshine the other in the most mocking and ridiculous ways.

But that didn’t stop Loki’s looks taking her breath away. “(Y/N).” He whined, dragging out her name so she’d pay attention to him, and only him, not the current saleswoman approaching them.

“May I help you with anything? Are you just trying out clothes?” She asked politely, a blatantly fake smile on her lips as disapproving eyes fell on Loki’s face. He stiffened and shook his head.

“No, we are fine, mortal. Now leave before you are dismembered.” He hissed, obviously sensing her hatred.

(Y/N) leapt to do her job; damage control. “Loki, Loki, Loki, don’t say that. She’s just being polite and doing her job.” She pushed his chest lightly, stepping between Loki and the unfortunate woman. Neither noticed the paling of the lady’s face, or her hurried goodbye as she got out of there as fast as she could, Loki just stared down at her hand.

They didn’t often come into contact, and usually when it was, it was when (Y/N) was braiding Loki’s hair, or painting his nails when he came for Girls’ Night. He was the only male (or when he’s in male form) they refused to kick out (occasionally Stark could join them because he had gossip as well and didn’t mind getting his nails painted). Other than that, it was usually play-wrestling, pranking or sparring. They were close, but not the closest. It had only been a few weeks since Loki came to Earth - or Midgard as he and Thor put it.

“If you would kindly unhand me and let me know of your true feelings towards this suit, I would be grateful.” Loki spoke cautiously, eyes narrowed, and (Y/N) cleared her throat, taking her hand away and brushing imaginary dirt off. The light-hearted air came back as she faked offence.

“Well, I think it suits you, your hair really matches the shade of purple and it’s cut to your frame.”

Loki smirked, “Yes, I had to alter the frame a little, because it was slightly too wide.” He told her off-handedly, before turning around and admiring himself in the mirror that was next to (Y/N), at the end of the hallway that the cubicles were placed in.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, you’re a magical dude who can and will do as they want. My turn!” (Y/N) almost leapt into the cubicle, and closed the curtain with a wide sweep of her arm.

Which unfortunately opened the other side. Sighing, she got onto her tip toes and closed the other side properly and changed.

Stepping out, (Y/N) looked at Loki, who had stopped preening himself as soon as he saw her in the mirror. His face was wiped carefully blank before (Y/N) could register what emotion he was feeling as he turned around in a smooth motion. He glanced up and down her and frowned.

(Y/N) sighed, rolling her eyes, “Really, it’s that bad? It’s bad enough that you won’t even tell me what you think to my face?”

“Oh, I think it suits you, your body shape was made for such a colour and cut, but let me make a few adjustments….” His voice trailed off as green tendrils of magic swirled out of his hand and his eyes narrowed into an assessing glare.

She felt the fabric loosen, shift, then tighten and rearrange itself. The material wasn’t all too comfortable, and the seams rubbed painfully against her skin around her midsection, but she didn’t complain. If she complained, then Loki would just smirk and say nothing.

He always did that.

He was annoying like that.

And she often got him back for being so… Loki. Well, not Loki exactly, just seemingly unimpressable, yes that’s a made up word, but she often felt like nothing could surprise Loki, and nothing could impress him either.

The magic stopped, and he stepped back to stare at his work. Nodding, he smirked. “You look like a goddess.”

“I thought I do all the time.” (Y/N) returned, raising an eyebrow. “Are you saying I don’t?”

“No, I’m saying you look twice as alluring as you usually do.”

(Y/N)’s thought process immediately dampened, confidence was something that she was often still working on, with today’s society using weak, vulnerable women as the desired type, and everyone wanted to be desired in some way or form. “Two times zero is still zero.”

Loki frowned. “I hate humanity.” Before (Y/N) could defend herself, he continued. “Humanity is so stupid, they pride women as being less than human and simply breeding stock, and men as the capable ones, when it is the women that are keeping the world together. It was the women who created the clothing, fed the people, and raised the children. Why are they treated less when they should be treated more?”

“Woah, Loki, we’re clothes shopping, not good to burst out with humanity-hatred. But it’s only for the more dominant culture. I’m all for hating the social hierarchy, but please can we not do it in a clothes shop?” (Y/N) reminded him where he was, and he visibly relaxed, shoulders dropping imperceptibly, and she relaxed too, glancing down to see what Loki had changed.

He had changed the entire freakin’ colour of the dress, and she saw that it now had a sweetheart neckline, which was actually the horns of his helmet.

“Loki!” She exclaimed, punching his arm lightly as he cackled at her reaction and waved a hand to change it back to how it was originally.

“Well, I do like seeing you in my colours, but I guess that dress shall do. At least it matches my suit.” Loki grinned at her, and she turned bright red. Thor and Loki were in an endless bid to claim the little mortal that they deemed so breakable, and Loki having her dress in his colours was not the first time, but it was the first time that he had outright said that he liked it. “Now, we best get changed back into our normal clothing so we can blow all of Stark’s money on these garments.” Loki’s strange mixture of his own lilting speech pattern, mixed in with what seemed to be her speech pattern sounded strange. Especially with his voice.

“Of course, you don’t need to change, you can just magic it away.” (Y/N) grumbled, and got into the change room. As she suspected, Loki was staring impatiently at the curtain when she finally stepped out, in her normal clothing.

They paid, uneventfully, but Loki remained suspiciously quiet. He was never this quiet and had his head stuck in the metaphorical clouds unless he was planning a big prank.

It was all (Y/N) could do but pray that she wasn’t the target.

Edit bc I forgot the tag list (again, I’m a freakin’ mess and really have no excuse because school doesn’t start for a bit) and you can’t access tags on PC Tumblr, so I always edit in tags when answering asks on PC.

Taglist: @drakesfiance

[kpopfanfictrash]

The Distance [ V-Day ]

Author: kpopfanfictrash 

Pairing: You / Jinyoung

Rating: 18+ [ smut + angst + college!AU ]

Word Count: 2,845

Summary: A series of drabbles about Valentine’s day and semi-bad boy!Park Jinyoung.

Your phone is a square, silver screen in the center of your palm. There’ve been no new text messages for hours, but you kept looking anyways, re-reading the messages because the silence while you wait is unbearable.

Y/N: morning [9:02 AM]

Y/N: … are we going to talk about last night? [9:31 AM]

Jinyoung: what’s there to talk about? [9:35 AM]

Y/N: maybe… idk… how you hung up on me? [9:37 AM]

Jinyoung: you told me to! [9:38 AM]

Y/N: yeah, bc I couldn’t hear over the music [9:39 AM]

Jinyoung: babe, you know this is my job… [9:40 AM]

Y/N: I know. [9:40 AM]

Y/N: I just wish that, for once, I could say goodnight to my boyfriend like a normal person [9:41 AM]

Jinyoung: babe… [9:41 AM]

Y/N: I know, I know. It’s your job. [9:42 AM]

That didn’t make it any easier.

Shortly after graduation, you went off to college and Jinyoung – well, Jinyoung had a friend starting off as a DJ. He asked Jinyoung to design the logo for his set, then the merch for the show – one thing led to another, and Jinyoung now designs graphics for artists. Not just little ones but big ones, famous artists who gain him a lot of attention and notoriety. He travels cross-country for work, city-hopping every night while you attend class for your major. He has this amazing new job, and you know this is something he loves – but being his long-term girlfriend tends to be difficult because of it.

You suppose the word is applicable – long-term. You two have been dating for four years at this point; five, if you count the amorphous eight months when you were just hooking up. That’s a long time to be together, especially with most of that time being spent apart. Two and a half years since you came to college, two and half years of dealing with missed phone calls and text messages, rushed weekend visits which never seem to be enough.  

Years of Jinyoung calling from the road, speaking in muffled corners of clubs to tell you goodnight. It’s exhausting, and the past couple of months have been the worst yet. Jinyoung is always in demand, traveling both internationally and not – there are times you don’t even know where he is, much less when he’ll call. This was the case the other night, when Jinyoung called to wake you up nearly an hour after going to bed.

“Hullo?” you groaned, clearing your throat. The room around you was dark, quiet but for the sounds of the wind.

“Babe? It’s me.”

You opened one eye. “Jinyoung?” you asked, rolling over to check the clock. “It’s nearly 1:00 AM.”

“Ah, shit,” he mumbled, sounding further away. You heard laughter in the background, the sounds of something breaking – before a door was opened and shut and his voice became suddenly clearer. “That better?”

“Yeah,” you exhaled, falling flat on your back. “What’s up?”

“Well,” Jinyoung hesitated – he sounded nervous, you noticed. “It’s been a while since we spoke.”

You said nothing to this, chewed the inside of your lip because yes, it had been awhile – this was purposeful on your end because recently, you’d just stopped calling. You stopped being the initiator, stopping making the plans because you realized it was always you doing that. You were always the one trying, always the one asking and quite frankly, you were sick of it.

To be fair, you hadn’t told him all this – which would explain Jinyoung’s current state of confusion. Rather violently, you picked at your comforter – you weren’t angry when you first picked up the phone, but hearing his voice brought all these feelings rushing back. You hadn’t talked to him in a week and this was the first time he thought of to call. You texted, yes, but didn’t say much. Just sent each other videos and memes – things which made you think of the other without really conversing.

Jinyoung: lol Jaebum sent me this last night and I thought of you https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=glii-kazad8 [10:08 PM]

Jinyoung: why do cities put these ‘LOOK OUT, FALLING ICE’ signs on the sidewalk? What good could that POSSIBLY do, if ice were really falling? [4:12 PM]

Jinyoung: so. there’s this sea otter at the zoo and istg it’s your friend Youngjae [1:21 PM]

These texts are fine, and you responded to each of them – but the other day you were talking to your mom and she asked how Jinyoung was. Her question floored you, because you really didn’t know. You knew he was alive, knew he was working and knew that you missed him. That was about it, though – hence the current state of iciness.

Jinyoung was silent on the other end of the line. “It’s not my imagination, is it?”

Playing with your sheets, you managed a sigh. “No, it’s not your imagination.”

“O-kay,” Jinyoung began, and you imagined him running a hand through his hair. “So, what’s this all about? Don’t make me read your mind, Y/N… I have to go back in five.”

That tendril of anger formed into a ball, dropping straight into the pit of your stomach. “Why did you call, then?” you retorted, sitting up straight. “If you knew you didn’t have time to talk, why call me at all?”

Jinyoung made a small noise of frustration. “Would you rather I didn’t?” he asked, incredulous. “I’m sorry Y/N, for whatever I did. There were a few moments I had between sets, and I figured we could talk.”

“Well, you’ve got me here now,” you grumbled. “Is that all?”

“I just wanted to call you!”

“You don’t have time to,” you reminded, knowing this was petty. It was hard to refrain though, when you missed him so much and had no one to blame for it. No one to vent to, no one to yell at because it was all just so reasonable that Jinyoung was gone.

“Come on, Y/N. Don’t be like that,” he sighed, music growing loud in the background. “I don’t want to fight with you, I don’t have the time. I just wanted to… I don’t know, hear your voice.”

“You never have time,” you muttered, ignoring this last part. “And this is my voice. Sorry it’s not very happy, but I just woke up. I have a 7:30 class in the morning and this is the first  I’ve been able to sleep before 2:00 AM this week. And,” you blurted, “stop acting like you’re the only one who’s busy! Stop acting like your work is more important than mine, and like I should always rearrange my schedule for you.”

Jinyoung fell silent for a moment. When he didn’t respond immediately, you listened to the sounds of bass rattling the walls around him. “I don’t… think your work is less important than mine,” he clarified, sounding awkward. “I just think my schedule is… a bit more inflexible than yours, right now.”

“Oh, god,” you groaned, one arm over your face. “Are you kidding me? Just because you didn’t study in school, Jinyoung, doesn’t mean that I don’t. My classes are inflexible, just like your work. The amount of homework I have is inflexible, and if you even think –”

“Okay, okay,” Jinyoung interrupted, backtracking hastily. “I’m sorry, Y/N, really. I don’t think your classes are less important than my stuff, or – fuck,” he groaned, his name being yelled somewhere in the distance. “I really have to go. But –”

“Fine,” you huffed, closing your eyes – the skin of them was burning, tears ready to fall. “Just go, then.”

“I don’t want to,” he muttered, pained.

“I don’t care what you want,” you blurted, even though you did.

“Y/N…”

“Just go,” you inhaled, stopping. Suddenly sick, you were about to apologize – but then heard a click, loud in your ear. Stomach twisting, you pulled your phone back to look at the screen. Yes, the screen was now dark. He’d ended the call, hung up the phone and when you realized this, you turned your face into your pillow and cried.

Waking the next morning, the pain was worse. Jinyoung’s texts didn’t help – he said all the right things but they didn’t seem to matter, because the next day was Valentine’s Day and he hadn’t said a word. The next day was also your anniversary, but you weren’t sure he remembered this either. Jinyoung had the tendency to forget – he was meticulous, so overly concerned with detail he often forgot the big picture.

Big picture things like phone calls and anniversaries. Swallowing hard, you looked up from your phone before sliding this into your pocket. Walking forward, you struggled with the rest of the day. It was hard, really hard to ignore the aching feeling which came from missing him.

Jinyoung: hey [4:14 PM]

Y/N: hi [4:17 PM]

Jinyoung: I wanted to say that I’m sorry, Y/N [4:18 PM]

Y/N: mm. what for? [4:19 PM]

Jinyoung: for being so absent [4:20 PM]

Jinyoung: I know it’s my job, but sometimes I get so caught up in one thing I forget about everything else. I know we haven’t been talking as much and I know it’s my fault. I’m sorry, I promise I’ll do better. Just give me the chance, I swear [4:22 PM]

Y/N: babe [4:22 PM]

Jinyoung: you called me babe [4:23 PM]

Jinyoung: … does this mean I’m forgiven? 😇 [4:23 PM]

Y/N: babe, I don’t want you to feel guilty about loving your work [4:24 PM]

Jinyoung: I know this. I also know I love you, but don’t know if you realize how much [4:25 PM]

Y/N: oh? [4:25 PM]

Jinyoung: like, my job is cool and all but it’s driving me crazy. [4:26 PM]

Y/N: ha. How so? [4:26 PM]

Jinyoung: Well. I miss you, Y/N. I miss you so fucking much. I want this job, I know I have to do this, but just – everything would be better if you were here. [4:27 PM]

Jinyoung: you’re the first person I want to tell shit to. You’re the first sight I want to see in the morning and honestly, it’s a kick to my gut every time that you’re not. When I sleep, I stare at my phone and know you’re already sleeping and know I shouldn’t wake you, but fuck do I want to just to hear your voice [4:29 PM]

Jinyoung: Have I told you I save your voicemails [4:30 PM]

Jinyoung: I have a bunch of them saved and listen when I can’t fall asleep. I listen and it makes falling asleep easier, but not much [4:31 PM]

Jinyoung: I just… I’m sorry our schedules suck right now. Know I miss you and would drop everything in a heartbeat to see you, if I could [4:32 PM]

By this point, you’re just staring at the screen. Just watching his texts come in and trying to hide the sudden wave of emotion. Jinyoung doesn’t normally speak like this, is never so forthcoming with his feelings. You think you might cry – would’ve already, if you weren’t walking down the middle of the quad. Your last class ended ten minutes prior, meaning it’s finally the weekend and all you want is to get to your dorm and call Jinyoung in private.

Y/N: I love you too, babe [4:34 PM]

Y/N: I’m sorry. I know the past few months have been hard on us both. Thank you… for this. And btw, happy Anniversary : ) [4:35 PM]

Jinyoung: oh, fuck [4:35 PM]

Jinyoung: I knew I was forgetting something… [4:36 PM]

Rolling your eyes, you walk up the stairs to your dorm. Swiping your key at the door, you wander inside – still staring at your phone, at the sight of Jinyoung’s blinking ellipses.

“Guess my present better be good,” a voice announces to your side. “To make up for forgetting, huh?”

Startled, you whirl. Your mouth slowly drops, seeing Jinyoung standing there in the lobby. He’s leaning against your wall, dressed in that stupid leather jacket of his –  and the moment you see him, you’re running. When you reach his body, you crash into his chest and throw your arms about him.

“Y/N,” Jinyoung chuckles, arms wrapping firmly. “Did you miss me?”

Burying your face into his t-shirt, you shake your head. “No.”

Jinyoung laughs, pulling away to look at you. “No?” he teases, laughter cut short when you kiss him.

His breath hitches as his hands pull you tighter, lips parting with yours to urge a groan from his throat. When his hands find your hair, your hips press together – and you remember quite suddenly, you’re still in the lobby. “Come on,” you break away, grabbing his hand. “Not here. You’ll get me in trouble, if we fuck in the dorm.”

Jinyoung just grins, reaching for his bag while you tug him inside. His hair is mussed from your fingertips, lips still pink with cold as he follows you eagerly up the three flights of stairs. “What if I want to get in trouble,” he teases, grabbing your hips. “What if,” he exhales, dropping a kiss to your neck, “I want to be punished?”

Shivering, you unlock the door quickly, shoving this open to point at your bed. “Get over there, now.”

The first time you fuck is fast – a needy bruise of hips and mouths and limbs. Each groping for the other, fingers gripping tightly while you sink down on his length. There’s barely enough time to remove clothes, Jinyoung pulling your panties aside as he thrusts upwards. He moves hard, fast while fucking and it’s been so long, you’ve missed him so much that you come embarrassingly quickly.

Jinyoung has always been good like that, using his fingers to guide you along, adding just the right amount of pressure to push you over the edge. When you come, it’s blinding – you grab his hair only to choke on his name. Jinyoung comes following, hips gradual in their slowing.

The second time you fuck, it’s slower, lazier. Jinyoung lowers you down on the bed, kisses a soft, leisurely path down the slope of your chest. When he pushes his cock between your legs it’s slow – groaning, about how wet you are from before. He switches positions in the middle, lowering himself down on his back only to grab your hips and turn you around. You’re facing away from him now, legs straddling his waist as you sink slowly onto him.

Being in control is something you enjoy, as are the noises he makes watching your ass rise and full – until he growls impatiently, and flips you beneath him. “I want to see you come,” Jinyoung moans, kissing you as he pushes inside. His hands circle your wrists, stretching your arms overhead before kissing down your chest. He flicks your nipple with his tongue, hips rolling sensually while you arch up against him.

“Jinyoung,” you gasp, already tightening. “Please.”

“Please, what,” he whispers, lips merciless.

“Let me come,” you demand.

Jinyoung nods, hands traveling lower. He spreads your legs with his fingers – the sounds of him entering you slick and hard, while you grasp for control. “Jinyoung,” you whimper, biting down on his shoulder. “Please.”

“Fuck,” he hisses, hearing your desperation.

When you finally release, he comes as well and you shiver, forcing your eyes open to look at him. It’s been a while since you went on the pill, since you made it routine to be tested. Now that you have, that you know what his bare dick feels like, warm cum inside you – it’s impossible to return to before.

Jinyoung stays like that, buried inside you while brushing hair back from your face and whispering stupid things. “I missed you,” he sighs. “I love you. We should get chicken later, because Miami has the worst selection of Asian food anywhere in America.”

“Worse than Texas?”

“Much worse,” he groans when you smile. Gently, he removes himself from your body, grabbing for a tissue and cleaning only to fall back beside you. “I’m sorry. You know that, right?” he asks you, suddenly serious.

You nod, pulling him into you. “I know.”

“I just,” Jinyoung exhales, tracing a small circle on your hip. “What’s a couple of rough months, when I want you forever.”

You can only blink, staring back at him. Jinyoung never says things like that. He never discusses the future, never talks about what it could or might hold. This is the first he’s even implied that there is one, at least out loud.

“I,” you hesitate, still struggling to comprehend. “I guess, yeah.”

Jinyoung flushes, head ducking. “I don’t want to be corny,” he mumbles, into your skin. “I just fucking love you and want you to know.

Faintly, you smile – as your arms tighten around him. “I love you, too.”

And that’s the last (real) fight you have over distance.

[ V-Day Master List ]

© kpopfanfictrash, 2018. Do not copy or repost without permission.

[rivertellsstories]

Case of the demon’s den Chapter #6

Chapter 6: Jack and Crutchie have friendly conversations with the walls.

Tumblr refuses to post these in the newsies tag, but if you are interested, you can find the whole thing on ao3.

David takes a deep breath as he navigates himself through the house. With his eyes closed, he searches for him. He knows he's fucking with him, knows he is playing him like a damn fiddle, but the fact that he's actually able to, is most worrying. Around him the walls constantly rearrange themselves, forming new corridors and rooms but he ignores them until a wall materializes right in front of him and on his right side, the wall opens up and reveals a cozy looking room.

It's filled with more pillows than he can count and the sight of it makes him smile. "Thank you Leah, but you and I both know that hiding isn't an option when he wants to play." The entire house creaks, signaling it has definitely heard him, but the door opens a little bit further anyway. The house's protectiveness fills David with warmth, but he doesn't have the time to dwell on it. He'd rather find him, than be found by him. The wall disappears and David before he continues his quest, he asks the house to lead Crutchie and Jack out. What's coming isn't pretty and he'd rather spare them the sight.

As Jack and Crutchie make their way down the ramp, the place starts changing again and Crutchie halts Jack by holding an arm in front of him. "I think it's better to wait until it's done changing. We might get stuck in a wall otherwise." As the room slows down again, there's only one way to get off the ramp. The left, right and back have been blocked by walls and Jack recognizes the door in before them as the front door.

"I take it we've got to go?" Jack utters and the entire wall with the door in moves up and down, as though it's nodding. "But it isn't even sundown yet", he says and tries to not sound too disappointed. The wall drops and Jack tries to read its facial expressions. It's kind of hard because it doesn't exactly have a face, but when the lights dim a bit, Crutchie catches onto what the house is trying to say. "It worries you", he states and the lights return to their previous brightness.

"What can we do?" Jack asks, determined to help even though he has no idea what's going on. The door swings open and Jack and Crutchie peer outside in confusion. "There's nothing there." They look at each other and Crutchie shrugs. "Maybe the house is a bit confused."

Jack screeches as something touches his back while Crutchie calmly turns around. The wall behind them moves slowly forward, pushing them towards the door and right in front of it, it stops moving. It's then that it clicks for Jack. "You want us to leave." The lights flicker and Jack has the feeling that he's thinking in the right direction, but hasn't said the exact thing the house means.

It's Crutchie who hits the nail right in the head. "You don't want us to leave, but we have to. It's dangerous for us to stay, but only now." The lights flicker enthusiastically and Crutchie claps with his hand against the wall. "Crutchie, what are you doing?"

"I figured the house would appreciate a high five." Jack covers up a giggle by bidding the house farewell. "Bye bye demon's den. You're a bit wacky, but I think it's swell. See ya tomorrow!" Crutchie keeps waving at the house until it's entirely out of sight.

The last thing Leah had told him, was that both Crutchie and Jack exited the house safely and after that message, her presence had disappeared completely? Nowhere in the now cold walls of the house can he find her and he knows that he's on his own now. Well, not completely on his own, but he thinks he would appreciate it more than the Red Lady who keeps pestering him.

"David dear, take off that godawful hoodie, would you? It's not becoming of you." She sounds so awfully ingenuine and patronizing. If he could, he'd make her leave the house, but there's not a lot you can do against a ghost who's stuck to a house. Some time ago, he probably could've exorcised her without batting an eye, but right now, he doesn't have that kind of power anymore.

"Your hair is kind of shabby over here", she says while tugging harshly on the curls at the nape of his neck and he tries to ignore her at all cost. "Fine, be that way. Maybe I should talk to those other boys, they seem nicer than you." Fully knowing that she's baiting him, he stops and gives her a glare. "Leave them alone."

"Boo, you're stingy", she drawls, "share your new friends with us, Davey. We're bored too you know? That Crutch boy? Friendly enough, do you think he'd be up to any games? I'd be funny to watch him crawl-" With the tiniest bit of magic, he draws a sigil on her upper arm. Barely any thought and furious intention combine themselves and with a high wail, she pulls back from him. With flaming eyes she spits out: "It's no wonder you're alone. I certainly wouldn't stay around you if I had the choice."

"Then leave", he brings out between gritted teeth and as they stare each other down. The air hums with magic and David thinks, no hopes it'll come to an explosion. Some part of him yearns for confrontation with the woman who has been pestering him for two years. But as she turns up her nose and comes floating closer again, he knows it's not for today.

"David, you and me, we're stuck with each other for a little while. But, don't worry we'll part ways soon. Though it won't be me who's leaving." David's eyes darken and before he can retaliate, she waves it off. "Come now David, we both know it's inevitable. Make the most of the time you've got left, I'd say."

He hates her, deeply so, but she's the liveliest and most talkative spirit in the house and she's all he's had for two years. The sudden arrival of a rowdy group of teens isn't going to change the fact that she's the only person he could talk to when the longing for companionship got the better of him. Even now, the almost desperate craving for someone to talk to wins over his hatred and he speaks to her.

"I shouldn't get them involved." Although he says that, he can't help but want to involve them. He wants friends, wants to talk to people who aren't dead yet, wants to know what has happened outside the house for the past two years, wants... Of course he also has other wishes, but they are so unattainable that he shouldn't even voice them.

Hanging with those teenagers will only increase his hope for his deepest wish to come true and he knows that he would not be able to survive the disappointment that would certainly follow. He needs someone to crush his budding hope and as he looks at the Lady in red, he knows that at least one of his wishes will come true.

"You are right, dear. It would be utterly selfish of you. Endangering innocent teens because you think us ghosts aren't good enough for you? Dear child, how selfish can you get?" He shoves his hands in his pockets and looks away. "I won't let them in next time", he mumbles and the Red Lady sighs impatiently. "It's too late for that, dumb child. You should've scared them off the very first day. Do you have any idea what you've unleashed unto those poor children?"

When he doesn't answer, she forcefully grabs his chin and looks him in the eye. "Where is your grimoire, David?" As his eyes widen in realization, she lets him go and pushes him backwards. As David stumbles to the floor, she brushes a red strand of hair behind her ear and looks down on him. "It has chosen a new owner. You know what that means darling."

"Also David", she pauses and smiles with pure joy. He doesn't like that expression on her face, because it usually means bad news for him. "Yes?" He tries to not sound too skeptical, but as he feels claws getting jammed into his ribcage, mercilessly piercing through his flesh, he knows he should've paid more attention to his surroundings.

As he gets absolutely bludgeoned and blood stains the plush carpet underneath him, he catches the high sound of the Red Lady's utterly amused laughter. He hates her, but it's still nice that there's someone there. "You've been found, darling." G-d help him, the sun hasn't even gone down yet.

Katherine Pulitzer stares at the locked door in front of her and debates whether she should kick it in or not. Jack had told her that he would be here after school, but she has rung the bell several times and knocked and yelled loudly, yet no one had come to open the door.

Kath: Where are you? Been yelling at a closed door for half an hour now.

After she sends Jack the message, she spots an open window and decides to let herself in through that. Without any difficulties she smoothly gets inside and lays eyes on what seems to be the living room. Her phone vibrates in her pocket and as she reads the message, the window slams shut behind her.

Jack-o'-lantern: Me 'nd Crutchie left like an hour ago? U should go home.

CutestKath: Lol, my entryway closed itself. I'm going exploring boy!

The last message doesn't get send, but Katherine shrugs it off. She's close to the woods, there's a big chance that the reception is a bit wonky over here. She walks further into the living room and smiles when she sees traces of different newsies all over the place. There's enough ingredients to make a few five course meals (Henry's stuff, no doubt), a stray slingshot (one of Finch's. Sniper has slingshots too, but she doesn't carve F's into them), a sewing kit (hello there, Buttons), a prayer rug (also Buttons') and Specs' shoes.

She pauses for a moment and picks up the pointes from the floor and puts them in her backpack. For someone who's very eager to break gender rules in the world of dancing (without injuring himself though, luckily for him, his ankles can actually take pointe work), he forgets his materials more often than not.

Wandering through the house, she wonders if she'll meet the David Jack keeps talking about. A teenager living on his own is worrisome enough, but as soon as Jack mentioned 'Davey' she can't shake the feeling that she's heard the name before. Almost immediately she associated the name with the smell of coffee way too late in the evening, black ink in a messy handwriting and strangely enough, Sarah. The harder she thinks about it, the more the fragments of David disappear.

As she enters the hallway, she stumbles over something and lands against the staircase. "Fuck!" she yells and when she notices what she tripped over, she whispers a quiet: "Oh fuck."

The other teenager is laying on his stomach, face downturned and despite the torn state it's in and the gruesome red stains on it, she recognizes the hoodie he's wearing as Jacks. Carefully she kneels down beside him and with shaking fingers, she reaches for his wrist. His cold skin makes her fear the worst as does the absence of a pulse. 'He's dead', she thinks until his fingers softly grab her own wrist. The grip is weak, but she lets out a breath she wasn't ware she was holding. "I'm going to turn you around, is that alright?" she asks and his grip tightens the tiniest bit and looses again. Katherine takes that as a yes.

Ever so slowly, she grabs his shoulders and turns him around. His hand drops weakly back to the floor and as he lays there unmoving, she fears that the movement might've been too much for him. But then he manages to open his eyes and tries to get up.

"Easy there", she remarks and moves to support his back. As something warm and wet touches her arm, she looks down at his torso. There are horrid scratches, stretching all over his ribcage. "Do you think you can make it to the kitchen? That needs bandaging." He looks doubtful, but tries to stand up on his own anyway. His knees buckle and immediately, Katherine has one of his arms over her shoulder as she hooks her own arm underneath his armpit. "I meant with help, dumbass."

The comment draws a breathy laugh from his lips and immediately after, he clutches his torso. "Ugh, that hurts." Katherine clicks her tongue in sympathy and manoeuvres him unto the couch in the living room. "Stay here, I'll get some water and towels from the kitchen."

As Katherine is filling a bowl with water, cold fingers wrap themselves around her wrist and thirteen years of self-defence classes kick into gear. Swiftly she delivers a quick jab to her attacker's solar plexus and raises the bowl in her hand to bash it to the side of his head. Luckily enough for Jack Kelly, she does not do that. Instead she calmly puts it on the kitchen counter, while Jack groans. "Jesus Christ woman, what was that for?"

"Valentine's day when we were still a couple."

"Look, I thought we weren't going to bring that up again. Also, don't act like our anniversary never happened, you know what you did."

"That's fair."

"Here take these." She presses a bunch of towels in his hands. "What are we doing?" He asks and follows her to the living. As they approach the room they hear a woman's voice talking and both of them stop to listen. "It's awfully rude to spy on people", Katherine remarks and Jack nods. "We totally shouldn't do it", he agrees but neither of them moves. They quickly exchange glances, spit in their hands and shake their hands.

"We're gonna listen anyway, aren't we?"

"Oh absolutely. Let's look too."

Katherine and Jack peek around the corner and watch as a ginger lady dressed in a red dress talks to David.

"I'm disappointed you know. The carpet's ruined thanks to your blood."

The sarcasm drips from David's voice as he answers. "Oh, I'm awfully sorry about bleeding all over the carpet. I thought for sure that you'd appreciate the red, since you've got the whole aesthetic going on. I'll stop bleeding right now."

"I hate you, boy."

"The feeling's absolutely mutual, Madam."

The lady sits down on the sofa and slowly drags her fingers over David's wounds. "David, David, you keep making everything harder. That poor girl had to drag you all across the hallway, because your sorry ass couldn't be bothered to get up. The sun has gone down by now and the house won't let anyone out until sunrise, you know that. You made her lose time and now you ruined her chance of getting out. The poor lamb is going to die because of you, darling."

Jack can't keep quiet anymore and casually enters the room. "No one's gonna die tonight, Miss walking period."

[happybeeme0514]

Irreversible Final Chapter

Don’t worry, there WILL be a sequel! Obviously. Lol. Big thanks to @justjen523 for helping me out along the way and being my coauthor! <3

Chapter 14- Wonder

Another week passes by. The gods work as usual, doing their wishes and punishments, but in the shadows, the manhunt for Diefropos rages on. It’s beyond frustrating, just sitting here, waiting for something to happen, especially when Karno said that he could hide for thousands of years.

Sighing, Teorus plops beside me and turns the TV on, flipping through the channels until he comes to one called HGTV.

“These actually work here?” I ask, immediately intrigued by the high quality of the moving pictures and sounds. He nods, flipping through some papers Leon gave him.

“Some gods like them. Have you never seen one before, Eden?”

I shake my head, completely enraptured by the program.

Twin brothers are going around helping families renovate their old homes before selling them and moving them into a renovated fixer-upper house.

As I watch, spellbound, I can hear Scorpio and Zyglavis muttering to each other in the back.

“If Diefropos is in hiding, he wouldn’t be able to use any sort of magic, would he?” Zyglavis whispers.

“Not if he wanted us to catch him. Why?”

There’s a pause. My attention divides between the TV show and the conversation, even though I know eavesdropping is in poor taste.

Zyglavis speaks as low as he can, as if trying to avoid me hearing him.

“I’m worried about Eden.” There’s another moment of silence.

“Why?” Scorpio replies.

“She’s…acting differently. She’s feeding much more often, and in bigger quantities than she used to, and after that…well,”

I hear a rush of air as Scorpio silently chuckles. Zyglavis lets out a low hiss.

“But what’s most concerning to me is that, her emotions are all over the place. Yesterday, she cried for thirty minutes because Ichthys sneezed too loud.”

I frown. I hadn’t even noticed I had been acting so strangely, what with worrying so much about Diefropos and being so frustrated with his cowardice, I had pretty much taken a backseat to me. As I glue my eyes back to the TV screen, I try to brush off my strange behaviors as stress. Vampires get stressed too. That’s got to be all this is.

…

As day slowly creeps to night, Zyglavis and I retire to his room.

I went over it all day, thinking about Zyglavis’ words. I turned them over, rearranged them, looked them over backward, forward and sideways. The only conclusion I could come to was that, maybe he thinks there really is something wrong with me. And with my emotions so out of whack, I’m not proud to say I cried for about fifteen minutes...four times.

“Zyglavis, do you think there’s something wrong with me?” I ask him timidly as he loosens his tie. His head jerks, and he turns around to look at me, frowning deeply.

“What?” He asks, confused.

“I…heard you talking with Scorpio earlier.” I explain.

“Oh,” He sighs. His expression softens, and he walks over to me, softly wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close. “I didn’t mean that I think something is wrong with you, love. I just meant that I’m worried. With Diefropos on the loose, and you acting out of the ordinary, I don’t know what warning signs to look out for. If something were to happen to you…”

Zyglavis trails off, and his hold on me tightens.

I nuzzle closer to him.

So that’s what this is. I know what he means. He is mine, and I am his. Our lives are like two strings woven together into one single strand. Cut one, and you cut both. If I were to stop existing, he wouldn’t be able to live through it, and if he were stop existing, I wouldn’t be able to live through it. And everyone knows that a world, a universe, without Zyglavis is completely pointless.

But somewhere deep in my mind, I know his worry is unfounded. That I’m okay. Something whispers that what is going on is not at all sinister, though it can’t explain what is happening to me.

As I lean against him, an old, familiar sensation comes over me. It’s pleasant, my muscles relaxing and my eyes closing. It takes my slowing brain a moment to connect the dots, but once it does, I fall asleep.

…

When I blink my eyes open, the first thing I’m greeted with is Zyglavis’ worried face.

“You’re awake! Finally! You had me scared to death, Eden!”

“Sorry?” I mumble, barely coherent. I look around, and realize that I’m lying in Zyglavis’ bed, and that it’s morning. Golden light shines in through the curtains.

“She’s awake?”

Suddenly the bed is surrounded by all eleven of the other gods, each looking worried themselves. I sigh as I stretch, my body shuddering pleasantly.

“C’mon, guys. I was just sleeping,”

“You weren’t even breathing!” Zyglavis chides.

“Vampires don’t need to breathe, Zyglavis,” I reply.

“Why were you even sleeping?” Leon asks, clearly unamused. “Vampires shouldn’t need to sleep, right?”

Everyone exchanges anxious glances. I turn my eyes to Zyglavis. I know he’s thinking he’s right, that there must be something wrong with me. Some curse, some strange illness vampires can catch, but once again, that little voice in my head whispers that nothing is wrong.

It’s quiet for a moment, no one sure what to say or do. I look at each god’s face, and when my eyes land on Hue’s, I see that he looks oddly at ease. Our eyes meet, and he speaks.

“Fatigue, excessive thirst, mood swings, and, ahem, desire…these are all symptoms of something,”

I snap my head to look at him, my brain making the instant connection. Zyglavis does the same.

“That’s impossible.” I tell him.

“Is it?”

I just stare at him.

No. I’m right. I have to be. Vampires shouldn’t be able to…to do what he’s implying. At least, females shouldn’t. My body is dead. It can’t change. A woman’s body must change, must be able to accommodate, and mine just can’t.

Subconsciously, almost involuntarily, one of my hands moves down to my stomach, and I’m shocked to find that it’s soft, not hard like the rest of me. Soft and warm and round, there’s a bump sticking out from between my hips. How long has that been there…? It’s small, barely noticeable, but it’s there, and now that I’m aware of it, it seems unbelievably large. A wave of emotion comes over me, and I feel venom coat my eyes in a thin layer of tears.

And then, I feel it. Soft, tiny little fluttering, a gentle nudging—from inside my body.

I’m…wrong. I’m wrong. Hue is right.

A sense of wonder fills me as my fingers gingerly run over the bump that I’ve been ignorant of until now. I feel Zyglavis’ eyes on me as my whole world shifts. Only seconds ago, there was just one thing I could not live without, and now, there’s two. It feels like my heart has grown big enough to accommodate the two of them, swollen to twice it’s twice.

Ichthys looks around, confused.

“What is going on?”

Huedhaut smiles, the action slow and deliberate.

“Eden is pregnant.”

[sweetcatastrophex]

okay it’s time to record my thoughts. lately i’ve been feeling, not myself? idk i’ve been irritable and short with jake, giving him attitude, and he’s rightly upset and i think i’m projecting my worries onto him. it wouldn’t be the first time i’ve projected my anxiety.  this monday was the deadline for the biggest issue of the year and i was in production until 1:50 a.m. (my work day began at around 8:30 a.m.) i’m so relieved to be done with it, as well as the annual guide. between that and election coverage i’ve been feeling stressed (as i do around this time every year bc of election coverage. remember a couple years ago when i had to see a few doctors and have tests done bc i was feeling lightheaded all the time and having panic attacks? lol yeah). and a few nights ago i had a work-related stress dream. maybe i’m feeling burnt out? what else is new. but maybe i’m feeling burnt out bc i’ve taken zero days off this year bc of the pandemic and bc my company restricted our PTO days and i couldn’t attend my annual festival/camping trip bc it was canceled. i always looked forward to that trip not only bc it’s fun and exciting, but bc it was an opportunity for me to unplug / take a break from work and regular life and be immersed in nature and creativity and fun activities, all without worrying about work or my social life bc i have no phone service out there. i loved going off the grid for a few days, experiencing new things and meeting new, interesting people.  but that’s just it — i’ve been feeling like my creativity has been quashed. it’s funny, or ironic, bc you’d think now that we’re stuck home all the time i’d have time to pursue certain creative projects i’ve pushed to the side for so long, but no. by the time i’m finished with work i’m drained and exhausted and end up eating dinner and falling asleep with jake. i haven’t even had a sex drive...these past couple of months i’ve experienced the longest period of time i’ve ever gone without sex lol. wtf. i hate how my anxiety and worries manifest in my body physically. with that being said, i’m extremely grateful for my yoga practice and meditation (s/o calm app for being my meditation coach) bc it makes it manageable. without it i think i’d be lost, hopeless; a mess. i’ve been writing down things that i’d like to do or try in an effort, somewhat, to manifest them. things like cutting my hair even shorter and dying the ends blue, getting a tattoo on my arm, moving to florida, enrolling in yoga teacher training, trying hip hop dance classes, trying pole dancing, trying aerial yoga and lyra hooping... sometimes i feel like i’m gonna explode and spontaneously move and restart my life. i almost feel caught, trapped. i’m also experiencing discomfort each time i think about changing jobs. i’m concerned about the transition from journalism to PR — am i selling out? am i giving up my integrity? what if i don’t like the position and my duties? what if it doesn’t pay enough? it’s so expensive to live around here. i genuinely don’t understand how people afford it.  not to mention all that is going on in the world. the injustices i see every day are sickening and disturbing. this country has grown unrecognizable to me. when my generation was growing up we were told relentlessly how great america is and now we are watching all the dirty lies unfold before our eyes. i often wonder about Netflix’s role in the media, the way it has been exposing certain people and organizations. but that’s for another post. it’s all become so much. i get overwhelmed easily. and as an empath, i feel deeply for all of the people harmed and can’t help but cry a lot of the time. and lately jake has been putting on a docu-series about a man who manipulated women into joining a sex cult and who’s blackmailing them and it keeps reminding me of my abusive ex and triggering me. and he puts it on right before we fall asleep... which leads me to: i’ve been experiencing these weird jerks/twitches as i’m falling asleep which 1. isn’t new and 2. is normal. but still. i believe (and studies suggest) it stems from anxiety. it helps when i meditate before going to sleep but i usually meditate in the mornings.  i often watch youtube videos to learn tips about how to become more productive. i feel like i have this obsession with productivity — i tend to feel useless if i’m not productive. maybe that’s what brought me to work in public service / why i’m in the field of journalism. idk but i do practice self-compassion if i’m not productive. at least i think i do. i want to make some changes in my life. i want to bc i feel like i’m living the same day over and over again, always resulting in failure — i wake up somewhat late, slowly get into work, procrastinate, stop working, get high and play video games or go out for drinks, then go to sleep late bc i’m feeling like i could still tick some items off the to-do list or bc i’m self-sabotaging bc i didn’t get enough done. then i have trouble waking up early (i’m coming to terms with the fact that you gotta go to sleep early to wake up early). i’ve tried reducing the number of tasks on my lists... i think what i need to do is start waking up earlier. but for me that’s a big undertaking. i’ve always been a night owl — growing up i’d keep notebooks under my pillow for my late-night thoughts and poems — it’s when i’m most creative. but i just feel a shift. i’ve been reading and learning so much about people who are “morning people” and how they’re so productive, having accomplished so much before the clock even marked 10 a.m. so i want that. if i wake up earlier i’ll have more alone time (so! important!) to get things done. at least that’s what i’m telling myself.  which brings me to another point and then i think i’m done venting lol this was a much-needed journaling sesh (still got my ~physical paper~ daily journal and to-do list journal, in addition to my work notebook😂 and my new planner/organizer from youtuber muchelleb just came in! lol). alone time is so important to me. and i have had none of that lately lol bc i’ve been living with jake. and don’t get me wrong, i absolutely love living with jake and his dad and my fur babies morty and bailey (a long-haired chihuahua and a maltese, respectively). morty is the light of my life, my prince, my love. but i almost sense a loss of identity bc i haven’t been spending time in my room — my own space with my own belongings and decorations, etc. i also kind of miss seeing my family but don’t at the same time (i enjoy my mental health being stable). and also don’t miss my cluttered house that my parents refuse to clean and declutter. i can’t possibly think straight in a cluttered environment like that so i’ve been extra grateful for being able to stay with jake these past few months. idk how i would’ve been able to work and eat (somewhat) clean otherwise. so in conclusion, with the good comes the bad. it’s a balance. don’t they say you can’t have sunshine without a little rain? or something like that. there’s things i’m grateful for but there’s also things i recognize need changing. it’s time for action. i’m hoping i’ll feel back on track once i purchase and install a new bed frame with storage in my room. one positive that this “quarantine” time has brought is that jake and i have been overhauling my room — removing things, cleaning, rearranging. the energy is different. it’s time to finish the project, then maybe i’ll feel more apt to stay at my own house more often, once my own private space is ready for dwelling. i think some time apart would do me and jake some good. they also say distance makes the heart grow fonder. ;-) 

[whereisthefood123]

Writer Questions

Tagged by @theolddarkmachine and @nocturna131 thank you for the tag sweeties! I swear I’m not procastinating at work but if you want to send asks or distract me from my responsibilities I’m not going to complain lol

1) How many works in progress do you currently have?

Not counting the ones I just have the main idea or the outline? 14 works in progress that go from having just one paragraph already written up to 28 single-spacing-pages (and the 28-pages fic won’t be coming to light any time soon since there is so much editing to do!). Including outline or main idea: 32 (but some are very old, so I’ll probably just drop them but I still have them in a gdocs just in case). These include at least 6 multi-chapter fics that I haven’t been brave enough to finish or publish lol.

2) Do you/would you write fanfiction?

Yeap! I love writing fanfiction! I would have started years ago if I knew it was a thing lol. When I was a kid and got obsessed with a show or a movie, I tended to create all this alternative follow ups or side stories and I just enjoyed replaying them in my mind until I found something else to get myself busy with. So I don’t think I’ll stop writing fanfiction for a while. I might try to write an original story but not in the near future.

3) Do you prefer paper books or ebooks?

I’ll go with ebooks. I love the feeling and smell of paper books but for some odd reason, whenever I buy a new book I just store it away in my bookshelf and never open it lol kinda like I’m just hoarding books but never reading them xD Then I would look for the electronic version of it and read it in my phone or my computer lol. So, in a way I prefer both but I just read ebooks.

4) When did you start writing?

When I was 10 I used to write songs with a childhood friend (they were super silly cheesy friendship songs and we found the lyrics’ notebook like 8 years later and cringed and throw the notebook to the trash lol). Then, when I was 13 I wrote a small original story for a school contest and won two tickets for a concert. After that, I only wrote school related essays (engineering and environmental essays for the most part). A year ago I discovered fanfiction.net and I started writing my own fics for Cyborg 009 fandom and then for Fairy Tail fandom.

5) Do you have someone you trust that you share your work with?

I’ve shared my work with some of my tumblr friends when I’m doubting about triggers or I’m not too sure about my writing. But I don’t do this too often. I’m super insecure about my work and too proud to ask for help (lol worst combination ever) so if I’ve ever shared my work with you before posting it, it’s because I trust you so so much that I’m able to swallow my pride and my fears (if I haven’t shared it with you it has nothing to do with you but with my personal issues lol). I just tend to reread my work over and over and over again until I feel enough confidence in it to make it public. Honestly, that’s why I have so many WIPs. Some of them are practically finished stories but I didn’t feel that confidence in them so I just stored them away. 

6) Where is your favorite place to write?

I always get the best inspiration at work. Like, when I have a shit ton of reports to do, that’s when I feel the words flowing and the story taking shape real nicely that I just have to write everything down. Though I’m in dire need to change my writing environment at home. I can’t seem to focus any more in my room, so I might move to another place in my house or rearrange some things in my room to feel a different vibe. I might follow through @theolddarkmachine advice and start taking a notebook and a pen and write somewhere outside for a change. 

7) Favorite childhood book?

Honestly? I was never one to like books too much. I read some when I was a kid but I prefered watching tv or going outside. But I do remember one that I liked very much called “The Knight in Rusty Armor” and I think I still have it somewhere around my house. “Looking for Alaska” is another one I liked a lot that I read a bit older (though it had the fate described in question 3 lol).

8) Writing for fun or publication?

For fun definitely. I don’t think my writing is publishing material. Though if I ever get to the point where I deem my work good enough, I’d like to publish something I enjoyed writing.

9) Pen and paper or computer?

As of now, computer. But I’ll get my hands back to pen and paper to get my inspiration going! Though my handwriting is so awful that sometimes even I don’t understand what I wrote down (this was a big issue back in college when I wanted to study from my notes lol)

10) Have you ever taken any writing classes?

*nervous laughter* I haven’t haha. I took the normal classes in college on how to write a research paper and how to use references and that sort of things (both in english and spanish) but I never took any class on creative writing or something similar. I had the chance to take a creative writing class in college but I chose another class instead thinking I would fail creative writing lol. If I’d known it would be this fun I would have taken it haha. It probably would have helped me improve a lot lol well, live and learn.

11) What inspires you to write?

It highly depends on what I’m writing. Some fics are inspired by songs, other by prompts, other by posible canon divergences, and others by pure stubbornness of my mind to not let me sleep until I write that fic!! So my inspiration can come from any place actually.

Examples:

A fine Life was inspired by @bluuesparrow‘s art and by the movie “Tales of an Immoral couple”

Sun was inspired by a tumblr post

To the beat of my song was inspired by the song “93 million miles” by Jason Mraz

Broken was inspired by @neen-writes one-shot 

Auto-da-fé (coming soon) was inspired by that stubbornness I mentioned

Yes, I took the opportunity for some self-promotion time and to throw you the name for my newest upcoming fic (so it won’t be left into my pile of wips)

I’ll tag: Let’s tag a bunch of people, if you were tagged before or just don’t want to do this you can ignore it lol @ranunculus-fox @snowmadien @spikerr @writingissues @xambedo @moonbeammadness @sketcher1994 @aya-eisen @capaleran2 @mangaguitar96 @neen-writes @littlemumu and anyone else that wants to do this!