#my only posts have been abt blocking ppl who support him

[starlightkun]

not to be one of those "google is free" bitches (bc in some instances they do more harm than good) but i did just search "nct l*cas allegations" (w/o the censor) and found several articles, a reddit masterthread, and some twitter threads recapping the situation (with varying degrees of reliability, proof, bias, etc.) in about ten seconds of scrolling, about the same amount of time that it takes to send me a message. so please! do that instead! i do not want to waste any more of my time/energy thinking abt that man, nor do i want anybody to form their thoughts or opinions solely on information they get from me! that's way too much pressure and responsibility to put on me.

[b3achysurfer]

SBG POST!! (hxh moots please ignore this 😓)

** disclaimer: DO NOT SEND HATE TO ANYONE!!!! whether or not they agree with what I’m going to say, please don’t send hate to them. if anything I say comes off as harsh/rude, just know that’s not my intention.

deadass wasn’t gonna say anything because I genuinely don’t care, but some of my friends/supporters are getting hate and it’s starting to annoy me. also my name got dragged in so it’s free game now 😛 **

posting this on my main for reach, but my side blog for sbg is @b3achysurfur !!

Someone sent me a post that was talking about how the fandom thinks it’s okay to hate Logan for being a nerd but not anyone else for the tropes they’re based on. They also said that people have been “getting defensive about their right to hate a charater”. The person probably has me blocked and won’t see this but idrc bc they were talking about me (to some extent).

no one is getting defensive about their “right to hate a character”. from what I’ve seen (and posted) it was just people pointing out how silly it is to say “oh you can’t hate this character 😡”. that’s literally it lmao. that’s not being “defensive”, it’s just pointing out how stupid you guys sound. also, it applies to you too? you can hate/like whoever you want.

“i'd be stabbed 27 times and set on fire for saying anything remotely bad about aiden but logan gets away scot free bc he's a ‘nerd’ and ppl simply dislike him bc of his trope? the double standards are just odd, that's what i'm addressing.” Scot-free? No I didn’t “get away scot free”. I got sent death threats, sm1 attempted to dox me, my dms were full of hate, and there was post after post of people saying things about me (some of which came from people you associate yourself with op). It just looks like I “got away scot-free” because I’m not a little bitch and can deal with backlash for my opinions.

you guys created this environment where everyone has to like everything! everyone has to feel the same way about everything! and a lot of you have this mob mentality and just follow the crowd instead of having you’re own opinions. There is no “double standard”. You guys hate on anyone and everyone for their personal opinions.

“what's the difference between them and everyone else? i'm "allowed to hate" these characters, but if i posted my opinion on someone like aiden, who is a mostly beloved character by the fandom, i'd get Rattled.” Nothing! There’s no difference! Only problem is none of you have the balls to express your opinions out loud. Not that I blame you tho, from my experience the fandom is very agressive when you disagree with them. And by the way, I was never “allowed to hate” Logan. Can’t even count how many people made posts saying, “dni if you hate Logan/any of the main cast” lol. Which also confuses me op. You can’t really complain about it when you’re apart of the problem, no?

“and anyways i'm talking abt the fact that people are defending beachy for their opinions, the majority of us dislike them but it's still insane the difference” I know people hate me, idrc ab that. but the fact that you complained about not being able to dislike any of the main charaters than added that you (as well as most of sbg tumblr) don’t like me bc of my opinion is so hypocritical. Do you not hear yourself?? Also people defend me because you guys get nasty quick. most of my posts are JOKES. yes I hate Logan, but I’m not being serious when I write things about him. Not to mention most the people who defend me now were at my thoart when we first started interacting.

Having different opinions on characters and vocalizing it is very important to fandom growth. You guys need to understand this. If you force everyone is like a charater then not only does it make the fandom boring to interact with it but it also creates drama. AKA THE WHOLE “LOWAR”. SHI WOULDVE NEVER HAPPENED IF I WAS ALLOWED TO DISLIKE LOGAN LMAO??? Not to mention, it allows you to see different perspectives and versions of the same charater just through someone else’s eyes. That’s why our fanon versions of charaters are just copy and paste of the canon versions. Because you guys never give anyone space to be creative. As soon as you don’t agree with it, you all jump on the person and make it a problem. It’s annoying.

If you don’t want to be attacked for your opinions on a charater then stop attacking others for their opinions. Obviously this problem won’t be fixed immediately but it’s one person at a time yk? Just know if you hate a character, you should expect at least a bit of backlash and debate. Shi I still argue with people and it’s been like 3 months. Just remember to be open minded, respectful, and have fun!!

“Hating” on a charater doesn’t have to be negative/drama. it’s you guys that make it into that. Relax a bit and have a little more fun. Or don’t, it’s ya life 🤷‍♀️

—- btw if you ever have a problem with me, talk to me about it or stfu. Stop attacking my friends/supporters. you can dm me, tag me in a post, send me an ask, comment, reblog, idc. I’ll respond (on my sbg side blog). Or just block and ignore me. Thanks 😛

[inchidentally]

Firstly just want to say I love your posts and opinions <3 Sorry this is a bit long, I only lurk around so I wanted to share my thoughts with someone (if that’s alright!)

As a Lando fan through all his teammates, I really love his dynamic with Oscar the most. I love that Lando always brings up how good Oscar is (even though everyone in the world loves to spread the narrative that Lando is washed because a rookie beat him*), and I love that Oscar is always supportive of Lando’s achievements too. They both put the team first before all else, and what happens in the race will stay in the race (no hard feelings after). Despite what the media pushes them to say or the narratives in articles, they both have a quiet understanding of each other and a lot of respect. What they have now is really sweet and I’m really hoping none of this would change for the years to come, even if they have a race winning car. Of course as a Lando fan first, I want him to win all the races, and I’m sure Oscar fans want Oscar to win all the races, but I hope that everyone can also learn to let what happens in a race stay in the race, just like them. For me anyone who shades/hates on either of them in any way just gets an instant block, I don’t want to hear it <3

*I hate how people always turn to shitting on Lando instead of saying Oscar is also good and equally competent?? I know Lando is supposed to be more experienced but he’s also young and he’s apparently never allowed to make mistakes. And I think not giving Oscar the credit is also disrespectful to him.

I also do hope this year they are even more comfortable with each other and will hang out more outside of races (even if they don’t share it). More than the media stuff, I am always so much more happy when they do something on their own, like how we found out Oscar was also in one of the planes from the recreating Instagram photos video, or that photo of them playing cards, that photo of them eating together in the paddock, or “what happened in Vegas stays in Vegas” that still haunts my mind….. (hate Vegas GP though, burn it).

tldr; Oscar is good for Lando and Lando has always been good in Oscar’s eyes, and can next season come faster

tysm anon and I'm sorry to be so late replying !!

god I am the same anon - I don't personally have favorites bc his dynamic with Carlos and Daniel was so much abt him being the baby duckling (and that on track Lando struggled privately w insecurity so much his rookie season whereas his confidence was building separate from what Daniel was experiencing). but what I love about the Oscar era is the way Lando just like, blossomed into McLaren being his home and his team when Oscar made such strong gestures to acknowledge Lando that way.

like so many ppl questioned Lando's ability to be in the senior/experienced/leadership role and wondered if he'd always prefer to be a little brother for a couple more years yet (and I think Lando wondered that too).

god yea I am so happy to leave ppl who try to pit teammates against each other in their own filth. like, enjoy being full of impotent rage ig?? bc apart from a VERY few instances these teammates are always able to be professional - and if they were already friends, remain friends. not only has Andrea instilled this from the start with Lando and Oscar, neither of them literally ever has had a history of friction w teammates or w each other. we've been through Monza before their relationship had even gotten settled so we're fine lol

and anon so far I'm genuinely amazed at how much content we're getting of them, of their own volition and McLaren's sm. the McLaren media fell off so hard right when the double podiums happened so I was worried that was how it was going to stay for 2024. hopefully stays this way!

[virocci]

wahooie

henlo and welcome back to the life update

featuring me,, viola

i dunno how to start so like hehe

sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo i finished alllll my exams :3 i got 4 days free since exam break so i been chilling :D i acc think i did pretty well on my gr12 exams, i alrdy got my grades for ela back and i got 80 on the written and reading comprehension!! thats acc quite good for me lol, i always usually get like 70 on comprehension so am happy :3 am js kinda nervous cuz it takes a minimum of 3 weeks of chem and math to get posted which suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks :(

i also got new glasses today!! i acc choose them back in december but they took 5 weeks to come back :( i think they got lost in the mail or lab lol.

i have work tmrw and its like 2;30am heehe, i acc have hsr farming for sunday relics rn hehe

since i got THE herta ive been building sunday and surprisingly got some good relics for him :3 my only prblem is that my mini herta is kinda trash ehe. ive been tryna pull for jade by js farming for jades but tis kinda hard since non of my teams r rlly good enough for alotta end game content. i have a problem with pulling only supports lol... i also still havent built rappa and i got her day one of her banner... i kinda regret pulling for her since ion rlly even have a team for her :( i've also looked to see abt building rememberance tb but ill prbly do it at a later time to see if they r needed in meta or smthin.

i also havent touched zzz in a while, i should prbly log on to check up on events and stuff ehe. i am still saving for the vtuber girls and i think i have like 100+ pulls and a guarenteed so am js hopin i have enough :D

side notes:

i got miku in fortnite :3 i got her full set since my brother gifted me two emotes from her pack so now im almost done the music pass and have all her stuff :D

I also have been meaning to play p5 royal again except im js too lazy to use my switch...

AND!!! i found out the dude i befriended on strinova is like 30yrs old (WHICH IS CRAZY) so like idk. if vro tries anything ill js block hehe, i have experience, unfortunately. also strinova's new battle pass is acc so cute, i LOVE the medal u get for completing it, its SOOOOO cute. i think imma end up buying this pass as well when i get to lvl 85 hehe.

anyhoodles,,,

eggrolls texted me :/ he asked me for math notes since he's doin math 30 next sem, i told him id send him the notes but kinda js forgot. he also attempted following me back, i js accepted cuz its wtver. he js annoys me now. he would always talk and try to seem deep but tbh he's kinda shallow. he js tryna seem cool i think... me and my wives have a theory that he has some self esteem issues and that js makes his self value be placed in his gf. i wouldnt be surprised if it was his gf who told him to js ghost me. still sucks but who cares ig. i think i'll send him the notes later, am too lazy rn.

my sleep schedule has gone to shit again :( ive been going to bed at 4am everynight, its rlly bad... i shud prbly be going to sleep earlier but i feel like im always up and js not tired :p

tbh the weather has been so shitty, and ive been feeling so shitty. its like so bleh to even do anything... i need to clean out my backpack for the new sem but i havent even done it yet and ion even know where tf my classes are :,) im js NOT looking forward to having to make new friends :( i js hope the ppl in my classes r decent ehe.

oh yahhhh, after my math final i walked in like -20°C (or smthin) to the mall hehe. i called my mom the entire way i walked, it was cold but i was able to go through a hospital nearby to warm up :> when i was there i got a rlly cute tokidoki blindbox figure (it was from the gems set, i got topaz) and like a flocked kirby mini figure with a hot topic giftcard i got from christmas :D I also bought an aventurine (AVENTURINE MY LOVE I LOVE AVENTURINE) keychain from makers as like a reward for doing exams for myself :3

anywayz, am too tired to continue, i duped enough info lol

im kinda excited for sem2 but also kinda scared cuz like ion have classes with any of my friends unfortunanty :( but that js means i have to talk to ppl which kinda sucks hehe

byebye now :3

song for u bcuz ur kool :D

[lliwless]

important edit 18/12/24: this is outdated from like over a year ago, i dont use tumblr anymore. find me on bluesky under the same username yaaaaaa

pls note: i dont support wilbur soot, i keep up my artwork bc it's my fuckin artwork, i'm celebrating my skills and accomplishments, not him as a person. thanx

blog info n stuff

hi my username is lliwless, find my names and stuff here. i am queer, i go by they/them and i am a whole 20 years old (wowie!)

this blog is to showcase my artwork as well as post unapologetically about my interests. block tags if you don't wanna see certain stuff! you can find my original posts with the following tags: #lliwless art - for all my artwork #lliwless animation - for all my animations (rarely posted) #lliwless rambling - for text posts where i'm vordvomiting thoughts #lliwless aus - for alternate universe ideas bc i have too many.

boundaries:

i swear a lot, block me if you don't like that

i use a lot of banter/unserious and lighthearted aggression towards my friends and interests, block me if you don't like that

i avoid posting discourse, block me if you don't like that

i'll be friendly back to minors who interact with me, but i do not want to get involved on a personal level with you

i don't like anything sexual or romantic in nature and will probably block you if you interact with that intent. this includes self shippers with my artwork (more power to you, just do it away from me pls!)

I LOVE SEEING PPLS COMMENTS ON MY ART IN THE TAGS!!! it makes me very happy, dont worry abt rambling too much or anything. i encourage it!

extra stuff below (long post)

i'm "new" to tumblr as in i have been here since 2014 but pretty much only lurked; i am unfamiliar with Social Etiquette here. please let me know if i do anything strange so i can correct myself :) i'll often ramble in textposts and tags, and i'll post probably cringe stuff abt my interests since this blog is meant to be for me to be freely autistic on main abt what i like lol. i'll make sure to tag things properly so people can blacklist stuff if they want

long-term interests:

wilbur soot & stories he's written/characters he's played

professor layton (clive + alfendi enjoyers PLEASE interact)

pokemon

hyperfixations:

minecraft

youtubers (RTgame, slimecicle, grian, sneegsnag)

just roll with it

generation loss

lovejoy

persona 5 royal

persona 4 golden (currently playing)

bungou stray dogs

cookie run kingdom, especially red velvet + cakehounds

i'm usually happy to talk about any of these at any time, but will mostly post about the stuff in bold italics

ask box is open for anything - talk abt shared interests, tell me abt ur day, send smth funny idk!!! doodle requests are open under the condition that i have full creative liberty + sending a request does not guarantee i actually draw it :thumbsup:

[autisticangus]

anyway im so out of the loop on the mcelboys

i pretty much only keep semi-up to date with Sawbones at this point, not cuz i dont still LIKE everything else, just a lot has been goin on in my life

if anyone wants a long and rambly update on All Of The Bullshit im gonna stick a read more down here, asks are open and its cool to message me abt any of it if u want cuz i have some really nice and cool followers/mutuals here that make me comfy talkin abt that shit

as far as the future of this blog goes i wanna start using it more again! the mcelroys have gotten me out of some really dark places before so i hope having more connection to this community and the people here and their content again will help me like it has in the past! ill probs post more general mcelroy content here than previously rather than just taz btw i just gotta fuckin uhhhhh,,,, catch up on a bunch of shit again before this blog is even semi active lmaoo but im like alive and on tumblr regularly again!!

Wow u clicked on this and wanna hear me talk? Ur awesome and sweet, thanks for caring!

These past two years have been extraordinarily tough. This is gonna be a pretty long and detailed post that deals with the sensitive topics of emotional abuse, abusive relationships, and alcoholism. Please read on with caution.

Back in March of 2019, so this was about 3-4 months after i left tumblr, I got a new boyfriend and things started out really good, he was kind of a "bad boy" and it was fun at first. Im kind of a goody-goody so it was very interesting for me at first to be with someone so different who had such different life experiences than me. I liked hearing his stories of living in a traphouse, and running with gangs, and selling drugs, and knowing people who had killed people. I assumed a LOT of it was lies, obviously, who just brags about that shit u know? I just rolled with it, didnt take it seriously, and found the imagined scenarios interesting to listen to. So much of it was obviously played up to make him seem cooler, and I shouldve seen that as the red flag it was, and all my friends did but I didnt. 

He had a serious alcohol problem, I mean I had coffee in the morning and he had 2 four lokos before noon. it was bad. about 6 months into the relationship he decided i was cheating on him with my ex who i had recently reconnected with, we missed being friends and things were really going well talking and being friends again, he was really important to me! but my boyfriend saw this as yet another thing i was doing wrong. when he decided i was cheating, that become his focus of alcoholic rage. nearly every time he got drunk, which was several times a week, he would accuse me of things, he would yell and scream, he would call me horrible names and make me cry for literal hours, he never hit me but that shouldnt even matter, i was emotionally battered and mentally bruised and everything hurt. he gaslit me into believing i said and did things i never said or did, i admitted to things that were not real, and then i was yelled at for admitting them. i didnt know what to do.

he was threatening my ex too, he would get drunk and say he knew where he lived (he didnt) or he knew what car he drove (he didnt) and explained to me many times that although he had never killed someone, people had been killed before at his command. he said a bullet in the back of my ex’s brain was just a phone call and $500 away. somedays he would tell me he was just going to do it himself, with a hammer, or a kitchen knife, or whatever weapon he could get his hands on during his explanation of how he would do it. my only option was to agree, to say it didnt matter to me what happened to him, i had to pretend my on

/ly concern was him going to jail for the crime, if i showed any sign that i didn’t want my ex murdered, it clearly meant i was cheating on him. 

i pretended to block my ex on social media to get him off my back and it worked a little bit but he still brought it up. and even if he didnt directly mention him, he would always tell me when he was drunk that i was the cause of all his problems, i was why he was so self conscious, i was why he drank so much, i was why he had to work so hard, i was why every single issue he had was happening. logically i knew it was wrong, but i was so conditioned to it by then that i just went with it. i knew that agreeing and apologizing made the fighting end quicker.

things spiraled this past summer. his job needed us to relocate so we moved like 4 states away, away from all my family and friends, and lived in a tiny hotel room for a month. during this time, his drinking was somehow worse. he was drunk literally every night but he was passing out so we didnt fight and i was relieved. i was depressed being stuck in the hotel room all day alone, but thankful i wasnt being abused at least. then he started getting into drunken fistfights with his coworkers in the hotel parking lot. one day he came home just in time to find one of his drunk coworkers trying to break into the room with me there desperately trying to keep him out. i was terrified and wanted to go home but he convinced me to stay. a couple weeks after that we travelled for his work again several more states away. his drinking got a little bit better here, but i was so depressed and lonely, i was so isolated, he was all i saw day in and day out besides his coworkers and i was nervous around them. one day the guy who tried to break in on me, purposefully, while drunk, hit another coworkers car and totaled it and tried to run the guy over and i saw the whole thing. a week later my boyfriend was also fired because he got so drunk he passed out in the hotel parking lot and the company needed to save face with the hotel after the whole car incident. 

so we travelled back home, but not my home, to his where we lived isolated on a mountain with no phone signal or wifi. the house was old and not well kept from being empty for several years, half the appliances didnt work. i was more isolated than i have ever been in my life. for 4 months i stayed there and just dreaded him coming home because i knew he would be drunk again and he'd yell or accuse me of things or otherwise belittle me. it was horrible. my friends all said to leave and my parents said to leave but i was so brainwashed into thinking that if i was just a good little housewife and if i just stayed home and did the dishes and the laundry that he would be nicer but he still found things to point at and say i was cheating. he was also becoming really controlling about my food intake and weight and i already struggle with an eating disorder so that just made me feel even more like i had to stay, my brain felt like if i wasnt under his watchful eye id gain weight again, like somehow it was thanks to him i had lost weight and not my own choices.

one day last week i expressed to him wanting to leave, saying how unhappy i was, i told him how sad i felt and how i didnt think we were such a good match. he didnt take me seriously, so the next day when he got sloppy drunk before 5 pm i packed a small bag and went to my moms. i was just gonna stay for a night or two but he called and screamed at me for leaving without telling him, i told him he just didnt remember me telling him because he was so drunk, and he accused me of not caring about his feelings and made me sound like the bad guy for leaving without his permission. i told him it was just for a few days but the angrier he got the more i knew i was in the right and told him i was done. i told him we were breaking up and id come get my stuff soon.

i got my stuff while he was at work this past weekend and moved in with my best friend. im safe and happy now. things are looking so much better for me and im so thankful to my friends and family who supported me all the way to the end.

i just wanted to make this post because, i know its not mcelroy related, and a lot of ppl probably dont care for stuff like this on this kind of blog, but i think its important.

its important to friends and family of people in abusive relationships to be steady. dont give up your ground. even if the person keeps pushing back and wont leave the person, keep being there for them, it can take a long time, it took me almost 2 years to leave, it takes some people even longer, but just stay there for them and be there for them when they finally make that step. dont give up on them.

and to those who have been in these kinds of relationships, and especially those who are there right now: it is not your fault. it is so, so hard to leave, i know, but please try to find help and support and resources to do it. if all your friends dont like someone, theres a good reason for it. please dont fall into the trap of thinking your friends dont have the best intentions for you. there are so many things you may overlook in the moment that others can see from a mile away are horrible. especially if you have been abused in the past. its incredibly hard to tell what is a red flag when your gut instinct is that anything and everything is a red flag. surround yourself with people who you can trust and listen to them

and trust me, i know how hard it is when youre stuck in that spot of KNOWING you should go but fearing that first step away. its scary. its difficult. but it is worth it. find someone safe you can be with. and if you arent sure, find a reason to leave for just a few days, an excuse, anything. give yourself space from the abuser, tell yourself youre going back in a couple days, just get out from under the thumb long enough to clear your head and things will make more sense with the fog lifted.

when i first got in my car and put my kitten on my lap and told her we were going to my moms for a couple nights, i didnt know if that was the truth. i planned to come back and i knew i didnt want to. i only took enough stuff for a couple days. i couldnt imagine my life changing so drastically. where would i live? how would i make money? who take care of me? i had no clue about any of those things. but after a couple days away I realized i would take care of me. i remembered that i had worked jobs before i was with him, i could do it again. i remembered that i had options of where to live. all of those things were so clouded when i was with him, they felt like impossibilities. once i was away, even just for a short time, things were so much easier to parse.

and i know i had many privileges in this journey not everyone is afforded, and my heart goes out to those who read this and are in this situation and the options i had just arent accessible to you, i am so sorry, i wish i had something more to offer you but all i have is my story, and a wish that it gives you some hope at the very least, and a promise that if you need someone to talk to, im here, i will listen, and you will be heard and loved.

i just want everyone who reads to take something small but important away from it. love your friends, love yourself. please stay safe. please dont give up. remember love should not hurt.

[skimblyshanks]

Ok, my thoughts on first viewing:

First, this is something that I always have to remember when watching his videos: A singer/Dancer/actor he is not. While he will vouch for performers against poor direction, he is acquainted with the orchestral side of things first and foremost. This is a glaring flaw in Part V which is probably the most muddled part of the video. While I’ve yet to see him full-on go after an actor alone, he got close this time w/ Corden and Sir Ian, though this was mixed with his general issues about how orchestration was run, I wasn’t a fan of that aspect of this.

I have comments on Part V toward the end of this post.

It might feel like a “Not 1998, so movie bad” argument, but this is based on the score and decisions in music direction

that said, 98 was clearly his primary reference. He didn’t really look at M+R for this reason which I feel was a bit of wasted potential bc if he looked a bit more into the OLC’s score it would highlight how much they screwed Danny over

He used the CATS wiki during his research for this

A lot of small jabs aat the show, but they’re small, scattered, and he doesn’t let his own personal distaste for the show taint his analysis of the score

Very hostile to the film’s musical direction, and calls the vocal performances p bad, but he isn’t knocking the actors on that so much as hooper’s continued decision to put the actors’ performances in control of the orchestra’s tempo to the point they had to set up a 5 track audio system during shoots

I’m forever going to be aware now of the orchestra in Memory and the off-beat cockroaches

related to the above, There is a claim made that most of the singers didn’t properly know the music, due to the level of score mismanagement, and says that the two cleanest numbers tempo-wise, Tugger and Skimbleshanks, are likely so because they are carried by ppl very actively dancing/moving for the most part to the beat of the original piece. He isn’t 100% on that claim, but it’s still one that I wouldn’t give all the weight in the world to.

Personally, I’d say it was more likely that ensemble dance-heavier numbers got away mostly unscathed bc the cast rehearsed those at tempo and came in for shoots knowing them at tempo. He says this himself, bc he talks abt how awkward some of the numbers are for dancing in this portion of the video. so yes, there is still room for his argument, and he was also mostly directing it towards Corden, Wilson, and Sir Ian than all the numbers, but I think it’s worth considering how much of that is also just. You can know a piece, and know it at tempo, but when you’re thrust into a situation where the accompaniment follows you and the click track isn’t the first and p much only line of action while performing this live and seperate from the orchestra like how Hooper does it, the first instinct is to drag, speaking from similar experience.

Still very mad at Hooper

Inadvertently and absolutely unintentionally gave me music-theory tuggershanks justifications

All in all:

Parts I-IV were pure catharsis. He managed to break down and analyze the narrative outline of CATS superbly, and provided it in a way so the unexperienced could understand it beyond “Lol cat ppl cult try to die” and even if he doesn’t care for the show, he clearly understands the story beats and the strengths of the score. I can sit through his negative tone for that. He attacks the writing of Victoria as protagonist, but not because there could never possibly be a protagonist, rather because in introducing her as the protagonist they undermined Jemima’s role in the original story, and saw Victoria touching Grizabella as special because it was Victoria, and not bc for the first time, no one stopped her (All of the younger cats tried to get close to Griz in act I, Vic included, and were stopped. While she is the most visually striking choice, he argues that the impact is meant to be in the fact that this time, she’s allowed freely. Her acceptance is facilitated by the tribe’s acceptance at large). There’s also discussion on Beautiful Ghosts’ placement making her seem unsympathetic, and her generally confused character writing. He addresses how multiple instances of blocking and choreo are directly in opposition to proper breath support. He does a mahor takedown on the way Hooper runs his audio for his movies; having the orchestra follow actor, always.

Part V is the weakest section of the video, bc he ends up spending time arguing that the actors didn’t know the music even when explaining that Having the orchestra submit to the actor was detrimental to all parties back in Part IV. Part V is named dance rehearsal, and you’d think then that he would adress the number of dance rehearsals vs the number of vocal rehearsals, which is where I thought the part was going, but it wasn’t. Good points were raised thru Tugger and Skimble’s numbers; both being fast-paced, dance-intensive, and dancer-led all likely contributed to their objective musical quality being maintained, but there really is a lot to examine in the way of vocal rehearsals, bc for all we know solo actors could have been told to learn their songs at their own pace and not fret the tempo so much, in which case it is ultimately a failing moreso on the director than them.

Part V really highlights Sideways’ distance from the performers’ side of things. While it’s true that when Orchestra enters rehearsal, you should already know the score by that point, this is where an examination of the rehearsal process for this movie would have been most needed, bc for actors there are vocal rehearsals before orchestra is introduced, and if Hooper didn’t have them rehearsing with set click tracks, if he or the vocal director weren’t advising them to practice at tempo, there’s only so much blame to be laid at the actors’ feet. After establishing in Part IV how very muddled the audio system was during shoots, it might also have been good to mention the utter crunch everyone involved in the movie was under, including actors. He ignores that the cast is largely made up of dancers, and in doing so implies that Francesca was unprofessional and didn’t properly learn her song when she had almost no time to learn it. It was a section of wasted potential, basically. He talked in the Les Mis video abt the danger Hooper put his cast in with his directorial practices, but we don’t get a condemnation of the utter lack of proper prep time actors were given before being sent to shoot with a piano and orchestra that weren’t allowed to follow the set tempo.

A reminder that p much all active production for this movie, including dance and vocal rehearsal was done within the year. Times where that works: the 1998 film, where the cast was made of alumni and current cast members, working with largely universal choreography by Gillian Lynne, and all having prior stage experience.

Times that doesn’t really work: When you have a cast with several new ppl, alumni from various casts who learned different choreography, and an entirely new set of choreography to be learned on top of that, along with not casting any alumni in parts that carry large numbers, save for Dame Judi Dench, who instead of playing the role she was once slated for, instead had to manage a role usually played by an operatic Baritone. Francesca and Steven both learned to sing FOR this movie. a good handful of the performers have not been in stage productions before. With the production schedule of this movie, and the convoluted setup for live performances while shooting, it wasn’t fair of Sideways to position it like the actors ought to have known better and shown up with the songs all at tempo, especially when he himself established earlier on and in his Les Mis video that Hooper assumes his actors know what they’re doing and won’t step in.

[outragedslime]

I'm not that anon and neither am I against meat Roxy but some people don't seem to like that iteration bc of the widely accepted reading of Roxy as a transfeminine character. Idk how much of it is canon-supported and how much is just hcs tho

I mean if ppl liked transfem roxy then go ahead but. I like transmasc roxy and making me tag my own art in a way that lets people blacklist my art out from my blog makes me Super uncomfy. Like?? If u dont like it just unfollow me or if u dont wanna see my art in the roxy tag u can block me its not that deep... idk how to phrase this well but ive so many thoughts abt this. Again ill say i woke up almost 22 hrs ago so im v sleepy so i might phrase things wrong but here we go (also sorry for rambling here but i rly wanna get this out bc its been bothering me for ages and im!! Upset! This big rant isnt specific @ u this is like in general i wanted to type it in a post anyway but i was scared but fuck it ykno.) Id do a read more but im on mobile ill edit it later

Like we all agree that its bad to erase canon gay charas right? So like...why is it g to erase canon trans characters. Like yeah it was a popular headcanon but like......?? Headcanons get deconfirmed sometimes it happens??? It makes me feel like having a woman hc for roxy is more important than having a transmasc canon, which is. A constant self doubt of mine like i worry people will see me as lesser bc im trans and ive also seen it happen! So thats not very nice! To see the fandom treat a canon trans character as "lesser" bc theyre not trans in the way they want!

Also roxy is literally the only positive transmasc character ive ever seen in any piece of media. Ever. So that adds to it. The amnt of ppl who i seen say shit like "give her back u dont deserve her" like? That shit hurts!! Im sorry but it does! Constantly being told that a character being revealed as transmasc is "not worth it" is one of the things that makes me wanna leave the hs fandom bc holy shit!! Thats so transphobic!

Roxy is also rly rly important to me bc ive never seen a canon nb character who uses he/him either and like! I never saw rep lile that! If ur srsly mad abt transmasc roxy and want to be able to filter him out bc u prefer a different hc pls take a step back and look at urself and see how that can be transphobic. Like u can recognise that a character was important to u and like... be mature enough that u dont make ppl feel like shit when they now vibe w that same character? I used to hc transmasc vriska and i drew a few super self indulgent drawings that i didnt post publically and it was a Super important hc to me but i wouldnt draw that again now that vriskas confirmed transfem bc im not an asshole? If u see a trans character and ur first thought is "theyre not trans in the Better way though so i hate this and will make it clear to the people who like this that i hate this" thats transphobic.

Do u have to like transmasc roxy? Fuck no! U dont have to do anything. But srsly @ that anon earlier: like if thats ur reasoning, why would you go to me when i clearly take a lot of comfort in this character (i even Said seratonin time like. I draw roxy and i get an instant boost of euphoria) and imply that u do not want to see it. Like if u do not want to see it u can just unfollow or block me. Instead u make me feel like shit if im being honest! Ik that wasnt the intention so i dont blame u ily n im sorry if im bein angry this has just been building up for a long time. Like "tag this Canon trans character u relate to and love so i dont have to see him" that..doesnt feel good. Pls be mindful of that h,,

Like if u hc roxy as transfem im not gonna stop you like you do you, im not saying this to bash at transfem hcs. But i literally mean it in the nicest way possible, u dont have to interact w my stuff if u dont like it or if it makes u feel bad. Instead of coming to me and making Me feel bad. U can just unfollow and thered be no hard feelings. I draw stuff to make me happy, and if that stuff doesnt make u happy u dont have to stay, but i dont want to post art of the only positive canon transmasc character i know that makes me feel euphoric and tag it deliberately knowing theres people out there who will actively blacklist that specific drawing. Im not saying its bad to blacklist it, u can blacklist it, but im personally rly uncomfortable w that happening w my art of this specific character so if u dont want to see it u can just. Unfollow. Like 100% no hard feelings im not trying to be cheeky i just think itd be most comfortable for everyone involved bc i dont wanna sacrifice my own comfort and euphoria for other ppl.

Sorry for writing so much and ty if u read this ✌

[volgotha]

I hope this isn't too personal of a question but, that friend your ex jumped to.. from what you posted it sounds like you have up on helping her? Wtf is that?

+So, the night I decided to cut ties with her was back in April 2015. My ex had just left to her place, and the story then was that he was going to come back, he just needed some time. Before I knew it, two weeks had gone by, and still there was no news, and she had started to behave verrry strangely over text, until the night my ex told me it was over for good. Y’know, after letting me twist in the wind. :/

Now at this point, during those two weeks, I was experiencing a continuous anxiety attack, like for two weeks straight i needed some ativan to fall asleep. I had begun to research my situation online. I typed up the mean shit my ex would do, and I was always redirected to things like “Grey Rock Guide” and “You May Be Dating A Sociopath”, and “Signs of a Psychopath” and stuff like that. It was the first time in my life I had ever seen shit like that.

The night he came to get his things from my house, he was a different person. Its was like he had stopped playing a character and was being himself. His true cold, cruel self. He told me while grabbing some things that he was planning to “take over Gabe’s guild”, and other very strange things to that effect. Affter he left, for the next few days, the anxiety got worse, because ppl had started to fall off my friends list and I ddn’t know what was going on. I became suicidal, and she was the only person I could go to.

At first she was kind and helpful, but then she said something cruel that my ex would always tell me when he was abusing me, and that’s when I understood what was going on; my ex was a psychopath, a real one, that sudden change of character was him dropping the mask, and the reason ppl were dropping out of my life like flies was bc he had started to spread bullshit lies abt me being the abusive party, and now he was trying to get me to kill myself through my best friend by getting her to repeat his cruel words to me in my hour of need. I had no choice, I had to block her to save myself. He still had his tendrils in me through her. I had to go No Contact. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t feel like shit about it.

Then earlier this year, I found out that she had been cheating on me with him behind my back when he and I were still together, and that a friend of a friend knew bc she had confided in them abt it. She was probably never really my best friend. the whole friendship was probably engineered by my ex, so he could jump to her after the devaluation phase with me. 

idk what to say rly. I think I’ve been through enough, and I did all i could. I stuck my neck out and warned her, and any mutual of hers and mine who would listen. Hopefully one of them is watching over her, and she’ll have a support system when he inevitably strikes, bc that’s honeatly all i could do for her in this situation. And if I’m honest, I’m pretty sure she’ll still come out hating me forever, because in that group, even if the person who told them bad things about me is a proven toxic abusive shitlord, they still hold on to the bad things they were told about me.  

That’s why i just… moved on. There was nothing more I could do. This whole thing was exhausting, I just.. want it all to dissapear into obscurity and forget it ever happened at this point, I’m finally at a place mentally, 5 years later, where I can forget it ever happened.  I don’t really want to waste anymore of my energy feeling guilty, yknow?

[channiekyun]

chick or chic?//cube ent./pd101//seonho

pairing: yoo seonho/reader genres: fluff, bullet list word count: 1870 summary: “he always stayed by you because of your smile, but what happens when the reason you lose your smile is him?” a/n: i think this is the longest thing i’ve ever posted but, dear by lord i love this boy. pls support him and his debut!!

baby chick debuting with a mini album?

an hour to write before I fall asleep?

bring it on.

ok,

you and yoo seonho have been friends since you were like 6 bc your moms both dropped you off at the same daycare center

how convenient right

but you haven’t met seonho ‘till a while so bear with me here

I like me some backstory to the story

you’ve been coming to the daycare center for 4 months

you were so-so at making friends, kinda shy, but most of the times energetic

like literal spikes of energy could be seen coming out of your back lmao

sometimes you’d be called out on it by some of the kids or supervisors but like

u didn’t care 

anyway, you’ve pretty much gotten your name thrown everywhere in the daycare center 

and you were just playing with blocks and crashing toy cars into them (that’s what kids do right?)

then suddenly some of or supervisors start coming to you with a cake with lit up candles

“happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear (Y/N), happy birthday to you!”

and your 6 yr old brain was all like-huh?

but then they told you to make a wish and you blew out the candles

and you know how things done can’t come undone?

well, there’s your explanation for that being done

and then everyone just started cheering

plus the supervisors were all like: “I can’t believe your already 6, (Y/N)! you’ve grown so much!!~”

but again you’re just like: “im already 6??!??”

but your 6 yr old self just thinks that this atonement for not celebrating your birthday before you even went to the center

keep in mind you’ve only been there for 4 months so

ppl kept crowding you and the adults just starting distributing the cake

and this boy that you’ve never ever seen before sits next to you 

and he just whispers into your ear “it’s my birthday too.”

“oh really? it’s not even my birthday today anyway!” you giggle

and this boy’s like huh

but seonho doesn’t do anything

nuh uh

he likes it when you laugh and smile

so you share your big slice of cake with him and play with him the entire day

you guys got picked up at the same time so your moms were just waiting by the door and you were saying bye and your moms were like “isn’t that just cute aww”

then suddenly one of the supervisors came and started bowing

“I’m sorry Mrs. Yoo and Mrs. (L/N), we switched up (Y/N)’s and Seonho’s birthdays so we ended up celebrating (Y/N)’s birthday today!”

and your moms were just like “that’s fine” but Seonho just looked a tad bit disappointed

and an unhappy Seonho makes an unhappy you so

you started crying, legit out of nowhere bc you felt so bad for him

plus you started screaming stuff like “it’s all my fault” and yea

and the adults try calming you down, but no, that didn’t work

but then seonho comes up and hugs you

and you surely calmed down while you held to his shirt

you felt reassured

and the grown-ups found this amusing

like you only met today but who knew?

next morning you brought a huge cake+a gift for seonho to make it up to him (ofc with your mum’s consent though)

you tell him to open his present and he did

what laid inside was a chick stuffie

it wasn’t big or anything, just average

and seonho’s grateful and all but he asks why you gave him that

“because you remind me of one?” you laugh

he likes to think that that laugh was also a present for him

and you play with him for the rest of the day

fast forward, your moms became acquainted then soon began to hang out with each other

which made you happy bc you got to see seonho more

when you guys were still at the daycare center you would bring him food

like juice boxes

but then like juice boxes turned to chocolate bars and then that turned into muffins

fast forward a little bit more to where you were now, both of you 14 and in high school, and you were still close af

oh and muffins turned to legit rice lunches bc he never had enough to eat lol

and you called him out on it a lot and he would either act offended or not care at all 

that’s where he got his love for food from~

there were a couple loose strings here and there but that happens

you shared secrets, shared friends, shared test answers

you even got close to his brother and he got close to your sibling(s)

but everyone knows there’s gotta be a secret here and there somewhere

but you made several plots at 2AM to get to the bottom of whatever he seemed to hide even though it may not be your business

you were each other’s businesses anyway, right?

anyway

seonho had a dream of becoming famous

you admired him for that

and the school was going to be hosting an event where he would be starring in

and you were proud and almost started shedding a few tears

you: *sniff* so proud~~

him: not again (Y/N)

when the day of the show came on, he acted like a stuck up celeb 

and you weren’t sure whether this was all just an act, or if it was just him but you weren’t gonna have this

you pulled him out of the corridor and slapped him just for him to get his sense back+you also gave him his rice box so

during the talent show when seonho was performing with the piano and singing you were videotaping him while standing up 

you: “yeS, WORK IT SEONHO. gUYS THATS MY BEST FRiEND” (a total regina goerge’s mom moment here guys)

you were that extra lmao that seonho was mixed abt what you did but he felt so happy so you just cuddled (non-romantically) at his house after the show

next morning, you were waiting for seonho out of his house so you could walk to school together

but oh

he JUST HAD TO WALK OUT OF THE HOUSE WITH A LEATHER JAckET INSTEAD OF HIS REGULAR OL’ CARDIGAN HUh ASDFGHJKL

((i tried to look up seonho in a leather jacket and there were no images, pls someone get him into one i will die omfg lord))

and you just walked like you usually do, but this time in silence and no hitting or kicking

was he acting cold again?

he wasn’t talking at all

and even ppl started to stare

you just kind of avoided him for the whole day

it’s the type of thing that would get on celeb headlines: ‘(Y/N) Splits From a Cold Seonho?!?’

you were walking down the hall just mindlessly, wondering what to do with that extra rice lunch you had in your bag

but then you hear a couple girls whispering in a corner:

“oh my god, did you see seonho at the show last night? he has so much talent”

“but like did you see him today? he’s wearing a leather jacket and acting all cold today haha”

“he even drove (Y/N) away today, and they’ve been friends since they got here”

“that’s pretty chic though to be honest lol”

and there were murmurs of agreement to the last girls statement

and once you got outside you started laugh

cuz they just started calling seonho “chic”

you never thought that you would’ve ever lived to the day where someone would call that tall, clumsy, cutesy boy something along the lines of “chic”

but you felt a pang of jealousy when the girl’s started talking about him

yes, you were aware of your own feeling, you weren’t stupid like that

you went to his house, said hello to his mom, and went to his room

you didn’t want to mess around with anything but there was one thing couldn’t keep your eyes off

that chick plush you gave him when you were 6

it was sitting on his bed

you picked it up and admired it but quickly set it down

on the high bookcase shelf there was another chick plush

so you reached for it and looked at it in your hands

it was the exact same one but with a bow? which makes you confused

“what are you doing?” you hear behind you

oh shit

“um-really nothing” you turned around to seonho still in his leather jacket

“uh, then (Y/N), why are you holding that?”

you dropped the plush on the ground

“holding what?”

seonho just looked at the floor, not responding

and naturally..

you took the opportunity to slap him

“why were you acting like that the entire day? why with the jacket, dude??”

and he looked up at you with honest eyes and quietly said “for you”

that’s when your entire world started crashing down

“..for...me.?”

“i thought that if i acted cool you’d like me better, I guess that didn’t work though..” his eyes still tracing an outline of the floor

“you acted cool, just so i would notice you more?”

“i guess.”

and naturally...

you took that opportunity to kiss him

and his eyes grew wide and he just hugs you like you usually would and it was all just so damn perfect

you pulled away and was all like “seonho, honey, I love you but can we get you into that cardigan instead of this stupid jacket”

and he just jeered at you with “I love you too (Y/N) dearie”

that’s how you went from making out with seonho in a leather jacket to cuddling on his bed with seonho in his oversized white cardigan (which was fckn adorable btw)

man, you would love having a relationship with seonho, anyone would tbh

you even spoon fed him the rice lunch you had packed in your bag

his mom would call your mom to tell you what the hell was happening at her house

you and seonho’s mom fangirling over your relationship with each other

at the next show, you and seonho had a duet with him playing the piano and you singing

he got you a matching leather jacket and you were like “ew no,” but after he saw your reaction he made puppy eyes and said “but couple’s outfits” and you just said “i’m sold, just for gags though, seonho”

a happy seonho

a beagle seonho

you match each other so perfectly bc if soulmates were real, and they are, you found your match

one time you were helping seonho catch up on homework in an empty classroom after school and you got curious

“hey, seonho, what was that chick plush doing on top of your bookcase. it looks similar to the one i gave you”

he blushed and shyly said, “i was going to give it to you for your birthday..”

and you just kiss him

and when you pull away you say: “I can’t believe they would call a baby chick chic..”

ps i realized how bad i was at summaries mianhae

[transbonmoved]

some things that piss me off sm abt saisai’s post: Asian culture by no means has ever supported hitting kids. Sure, a little jokey slap on the back or a pinch but never that giant swing of an arm I should know I’m from South India which is more aggressive to kids than in Japan. My mother has said some horrible things to me and that is never excused but she always apologizes, same with my father. In fact, Japanese culture promotes extra special treatment of kids to a certain age. (1/?)

sure maybe mitsuki didn’t slap around her son as much as endeavor. but what she said to him about the kidnapping? there’s backstory there and you can tell, it’s bad. that’s probably why he’s always wanting to be better bc his mom has never had enough from him. (that’s actually really asian right there, but not to the extent of actual child abuse). Bakugou is a spoiled brat but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t abused. He was amazing to everyone but his mom, that’s what it seems. Dads not great either

and let’s be real, if mitsuki was a guy the entire ~fandom~ would be all over bakugou’s tragic past and sad sob story which goes to show the sexism there too. women aren’t inherently good and pure!! and he didn’t even fucking do anything abt todorokis past he was a big dick abt it in fact.

honestly theres so many layers to saisais take on the matter, but smth thats been REALLY grating on me is also the comment on it somehow being normal in japanese households. i couldnt find in her bio or anything if saisai is white, but either way, shes trying to say that abuse is acceptable in a non-white culture & due to it she doesnt care about the situation. saying “its normal there” is basically saying that if it were a white kid you would care. i originally described it as softcore racism i think? but the more you look under the surface its just unapologetic, especially how shes blocking everyone who disagrees with her.

the way ppl are talking about mitsuki too is very transparent. people are all for shitting on endeavor- rightfully so, but when a mother lays a hand on her child the same way all of the sudden theres excuses. of course this stems from the misogyny of forcing women into the nurturing role & basically only seeing them as that, and it being seen as funny when a woman hurts a man bc the men are always supposed to be in charge, but i digress. even if she didnt smack him she still called him a little bitch & blamed katsuki for his kidnappings! thats still emotional abuse! victim blaming your own goddamn kid, and i doubt thats intentional but it makes the connection to katsuki feeling like its his fault for all mights retirement. he blames things out of his control on himself, which, when meeting mitsuki, makes perfect sense. as always, ppl are under the assumption that if you arent always miserable, or always thinking/talking about it, you werent abused. 

its easy to buy todorokis abuse bc his experiences of abuse have been the center of his character, even baring a scar due to not only his dads but his moms abuse (which, interestingly enough, lots of ppl dont think she was abusive either, lots of bnha moms get free passes it seems). todoroki is a reserved character that often seems to dissociate so of course people will buy into endeavor being an awful person, hes not someone as quirky as katsuki. the narrative also frames endeavor in an obviously evil light, while mitsukis abuse is framed in a comedic light, which i already mentioned why ppl think thats funny.

you could really just go on and on forever about all the bullshit saisai & others are bringing up

[elvesofnoldor]

i mean yeah, ofc he’s right about the chantry, like that’s basically common sense at this point. it’s just the course of action he decided to take that people have disagreement on. plus whomst like templars lmao like, i know there r a few pro-templars in this fandom but they are quite and we don’t mess with them lmao.  i mean, my biggest beef with a*ders is that he’s super mean and hypocritical to merrill aka my damn wife lmao, also he would verbally approve hawke selling fenr*s back into slavery AND he’d give hawke friendship points for selling  fenr*s back into slavery. A lot of ppl argued that its ooc cause they actually agree with a*ders when a*ders tried to argue that mages in circles are slaves (they are not) and they can’t stomach the fact that their fave don’t care abt actual slaves and only uses that analogy to try to gain fenr*s’ sympathy and potential support to his cause. They can’t stomach the fact that a*ders only care about his fellow mages’ plight and did not truly give a fuck about other people’s very real struggles at all then turned around and whined about other people (specifically hawke’s companion) not supporting him.  i didnt hear any banters b/w a*ders and isabela cause i never have isabela and him at the same time but i can imagine this dude being condescending and rude to her. i dont feel bad for not liking a*ders a whole lot, i just find it disheartening that if you say one (1) thing that suggested you don’t like a*ders or don’t quite agree with what he did, it’s like you are #banned! (plus i was mainly sad that this one a*ders stanning artist i liked and was probably mutual with me hard blocked me out of nowhere even tho we never interacted, like it made me feel like oh geez i did or said something bad or whatever or we had beef when it was none of that lol like they could have just soft blocked instead but no) it’s just so funny that they put a*ders on a pedestal and treated him like some sort of groundbreaking freedom fighter when he was just a guy with his heart at the right place and wished to pursue justice for his fellow mages but ultimately made a messy choice due to many different controllable and uncontrollable factors in his life. In regards to what he did, shit is nuanced, but no we can’t recognize that i guess. What’s funnier is that they’d just turned around and ignored or shit on Actual Freedom Fighter briala who’s been working hard to cultivate a better future for her socially disenfranchised and marginalized people and actually know what the fuck she’s doing, unlike you know, a*ders. It’s also funny that grown folks act like a*ders is the most Oppressed and Hated character in the da fandom when h*nders is literally one of the most popular ship involving hawke, and that among the fans on tumblr he’s still quite popular, they just can’t stand one a few posts joking about a*ders being a terrorist when he licherally committed uh something that can be categorized as a terrorist act??? i wouldn’t call him a terrorist since blowing up a building symbolizing institution of oppression is not terrorism, but still it’s only a few posts and the chantry isn’t even real! mages aren’t even real! Not to mention the explosion he set off has destroyed and set most of the city on fire lol, cant blame folks for mistaking what he did as act of terrorism when he sabotaged thousands of innocent lives lmao. i’ve literally seen clowns arguing that varric is lying about the damage when he’s putting his own money in reconstructing kirkwall which anders destroyed! 

[arohart]

Diamond Edge in NY Concert Experience

sorry i’ve been so inactive lately, you can blame the entirety of my trip to New York and the Seventeen concert :,) 

Anyways, I posted all of the videos I got on my Instagram (@/justpeachymomo) and I talked about the whole experience in a thread on Twitter (@iamumisonoda) so feel free to check those out if you’d like! If not, I’ll put some of the key moments in this here post

waiting in line was a fairly decent experience. we were in the shade, there were plenty of nice people, i did a lot of dancing, etc.

BUT thanks to the sidewalk, my hands were FILTHY within minutes

hi-touch was moved from after the concert to before the concert @ 5

i was expecting to be able to have a few minutes to freshen up, but as soon as i walked into the venue @ 5:00, i made direct eye contact with minghao and panicked

not only did i 1) not prepare anything to say that soon but 2) my hands were filthy and I hadn’t been able to wash them as there were no bathrooms nearby

regardless, hi-touch was wild. it went by so fast and i think i was so shaken by how sudden it was that i forgot to make eye contact with about half the group. here’s who i did get a good look at though!

minghao and jun: both are so incredibly handsome in real life and, after i made eye contact with minghao for two seconds while walking in, he just had this half-smirk on and jun did too kinda??

jeonghan: jeonghan....,,, is so pretty, so ethereal in person. i stg i was so shook i don’t even remember who was on either side of him, i was just focused in on him

woozi: as someone who is 5′2″, woozi wasn’t that much taller than me but that just made it easier to make eye contact with him lmao. he looked so sweet and kind and iaodighlidj

seungkwan: seungkwan was GLOWING i am sure of it. he looked just so amazing?!!! i told him “you’re so beautiful” and he just had this really wide and bright smile that reached his eyes and was so genuine and i wanted to cry

dk: dk was so tall and handsome, i felt so incredibly blessed to see him so close. his features are all so sharp and i absolutely love it. as i was passing in front of him, he had this face like: <:o, like a very happy, surprised expression?? idk if it was bc i had this face glitter on or bc lots of ppl in line had these “Carats <3 DK” stickers including myself but !!!!

joshua: SO JOSHUA OOOOOOOH BOY, okay.!!! joshua was the only member i had something prepared for. but, since hi-touch was going by so fast i had to scrap it. i ended up looking him in the eyes and saying as sincerely as possible, “i love you SO much” and he just looked back at me and said “thank you” in his gentle voice and WOW also his hands were kinda soft but also cold?? 

(damn i can’t believe i missed 1/2 of performance unit and the whole hip-hop unit gdi izzy)

despite having a vip ticket, i ended up kinda way in the back bc i couldn’t see and there was this little bar area that was elevated since the venue is normally a club

i spent the whole concert with a support beam partially blocking my view :)

there were so many LIT remixes of their songs (there was a rock ver. of OMG, Rock had an extra dance break at the end, Don’t Listen in Secret sounded sorta gothic/vampire-y)

hoshi, wonwoo, and jun taught everyone the point moves in Crazy in Love, Rock, and Chuck and shaded the 2nd and 3rd floors for not dancing

hoshi said wonwoo’s body was sexy and jun motioned over wonwoo’s body

hoshi said how u need to use ur hips in Crazy in Love and jun just cupped wonwoo’s ass

seungkwan was in the middle of talking but cut himself off to point to a little kid in the audience and ask “how old are you??” in english and the kid said seven so he was like “Ah you’re seven? You’re seven, we are Seventeen!” and everyone LOST it

at some point they showed old photos of the boys and i almost cried

dino sang a little bit of Single Ladies by Beyonce, What Do You Mean by Justin Bieber, Uptown Funk by Bruno Mars and ended it w/ Billie Jean by Michael Jackson (ofc)

woozi sang a little bit of I’m The One by DJ Khaled and hoshi, vernon, and dk did the juju on that beat move

coups and seungkwan did aegyo 

the whole venue got turnt when they said “i check in New York City” in Check In

mingyu gave coups a piggyback ride during Healing

during one of the members’ ending ment, minghao whispered something to vernon and vernon held onto minghao’s shoulder and looked at him with this face like “you right :o” and they kept whispering back and forth 

it was so funny i wish i knew what they were talking abt

and that’s about it!! i didn’t want to mention any of the negative stuff that occurred for the sake of keeping the post positive (especially bc i’m sure plenty of other people have already talked about the bad). overall, the concert was great and New York fans were respectful for the most part except for the bad eggs who in no way represent all of the fans that were there. i certainly had an amazing time and i’m glad i could have this experience. hoping i’m able to see them whenever they come back! 

[volgotha]

Holy shit I just read your text post I'm so sorry! How are people so easily sold on bullshit??? What happened that lead up to all that?

Okay, strap yourself in. I’m only typing this mess up once more and then I’m never mentioning it again as long as I live. I’m not going to tag it with anything relevant either so once its posted, i’m letting it get lost in the sea of reblogs. Here we go, warning; this is gon be long.

In 2006 I went to college. From 2006 to 2009 I hung out with 5 friends and my bf at the time, Andre. It was in 2007 that we started to poke our heads into the 2C11 room (the clubspace room). Matt and his best friend Jogn Carlo started coming with us to Rocky Horror, a thing only myself and two of my 5 friends would do together, along with ppl they knew from their old highschool. By 2009, we had formed a big gang of friends from the clubspace, and we all started going to movies and sushi together. One of my friends organize panels for Otakuthon, where we’d all meet up.      

But in 2009, two of the 5 ppl I hung out with had a falling out. They stopped being friends. One went to university, the other was around for one more year then she went to university in 2010. That’s when the old group began to change from a family to a clique: In 2010 new members joined the club, and became new staples in the old group–most importantly, a guy named Tin.

It used to feel like a big family, but when the new semester started in September 2010 and new members flooded the club, everything changed. Tin instantly gave me a strange feeling in my gut, like there was something off abt him I couldn’t articulate. Shannon was dating Alex, the then club president, who stepped down in disgrace after I and one of those 5 friends went to the student union to complain abt him being the Harvey Weinstein of the club,. He wanted to permanently ban her from the club bc that summer when he was making a shitty youtube movie, he asked her out and she said no. The only reason he stepped down is bc I helped her take it to the student union and took him down. So when 2010 came along, Tin swooped in and became Alex 2.0, and when I warned ppl abt him they didn’t listen.

Fast forward a year to 2011, and the shitstorm happens; My mom had bvee battling with cancer since 2009. She had a hysterectomy but it didn’t work, and the cancer came back with a vengance.

January 15th 2011: My mom comes into my room and tells me her doctor doesn’t give her 1 year left to live. A few minutes after she leaves my room, Tin talks to me on Steam. He starts trolling me, I exploded on him. I felt bad about it so I tried to apologise to him, and I wrote on my facebook wall a message: “Just found out my mom has a year left to live, not in my right head, plz stay away from me for a while” so i wouldn’t explode on anyone else. I said I tried to apologise to Tin on steam, because him being an abujsive sociopath, instead of just accepting the apology or not like a normal person, instead he starts demanding that i admit to being a shitdisturber. I ignore him at that point, tell him im sorry, wish him good night and then sign off steam, and go to bed.

The following day, Shannon heads me off as I’m in the 2C11 hallway heading to the clubspace room; she warns me that Kelly is having a shit fit and screaming about how much of a horrible person I am, that apparently Kelly thinks my facebook post is me using my mom as an excuse to get away with being a bitch. I run to confront her, because excuse me, no it fucking wasn’t yknow? and whatever trauma she hasn;’t resolved yet doesn’t give her the right to twist my meanings and paint me as a monster. Thats when she goes into the Oliver’s caf so I follow her, and she screams at me calls me pathetic and heads back into the clubspace, and everyone followed her and left me in the caf crying with Shannon and Alex. :/

The situation was made ten times worse later that night by a certain person named Mathew, remember him? He was supposed to be my friend. Instead, he took the opportunity to write a huge post on fb tearing me down, on which everyone else joined in taking a public jab at me. Matt was seen as the community leader at the time. He could have used his power to calm the situation down, instead he made things worse. To this day, I suspect that troll Tin is the one who twisted my words to trigger Kelly and cause all of this, and that he also had Matt in the palm of his hand, but i digress; Matt’s post convinced most of them to ditch me. That devastated me in an already overwhelmed state, and I attempted suicide a few nights later.

That summer, I saw that my former friends were all having a big party, “What Killed the Dinosaurs? The Bad Movie Night.”, and I wasn’t invited. Shannon saw how much it hurt me, so she invited to her bf’s party instead, and that’s where I met Paul.

The following school year of 2011-2012 went by without much incident. The people who had ghosted me slowly added me back, Matt even apologized for his shit, and things seemed to be on the up and up. It looked like all this drama was behind us. I was wrong.

After I graduated, I decided to go visit the club in Fall 2012. Big mistake.

I saw someone I knew, Sarah, crying on someone’s lap, and asked her what was up. She told me she was in an abusive relationship with Tin. For giving her the advice to leave him, Tin came at me on steam again, and I told him that he was an abuser, that he would not intimidate me and to go fuck himself, and I blocked him. Suddenly, Matt was trying to extort 100$ from me for 2 locks I had broken the year before, which should’ve only cost 42$. Where did that come from? Well, Tin was the club’s Treasurer that year. He was trying to get back at me for standing up to him and helping his victim escape, and he was doing it through Matt, who was going apeshit on me on MSN for refusing to pay 100$. I insisted I should only have to pay what I owe, which was 42$. He kept freaking out on me, so finally I threatened to get a lawyer involved, and that’s when he backed down. I still paid the money I owed for the locks I had broken but I blocked Matt, having had enough of his bullshit, and that’s when suddenly a bunch of ppl from the group ghosted me for good.

Why was I ghosted when Matt was clearly the one in the wrong? Because Tin. They ghosted me bc Tin told them to. Tin and Matt told them all sorts of shitty things about me and they believed them. They don’t hold Tin or Matt to any of their shitty actions though bc they don’t want the same abuse that happened to me to happen to them. They turn a blind eye to every shitty thing Tin and Matt do. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to understand there’s an extremely toxic abuse dynamic at play in that group.

But the story doesn’t end there. Remember that party I went to with Shannon, and that guy I met named Paul? From november 2011 to march 2015 we were together. I was isolated from whoever was left, only hung out with him and his friends. In 2014, I became close friends with a girl name d Ariel, a member of that old groiup who ghosted me. But that was probably a manufactured relationship manipulated into existance by Paul, so he could jump to her when he was done with me.

Paul was extremely abusive when no one was around. The night he left, we had a huge fight. I tried to escape the situation by running upstairs. He chased me and when I ran into my TV room and closed the door behind me, he started pounding on it and trying to push his way in. When he did manage to get through the door, I panicked, picked up a glass bottle and threw it at him, and then slammed the door again when he backed out. The bottle broke, and cut his finger very deep. He used that cut to get everyone present during the situation on his side. Nevermind all the crazy abusive stuff he had just pulled in front of them, no, I was the bad guy, and once he had them convinced, he left to my then bff’s house, who later became his new gf.

He posted a picture of the wound on facebook, and because of that and previous drama from years ago that never really went away, most of the friends I had left from Dawson believed him, and ghosted me. I couldn’t tell them that a week earlier he had raped me, and that’s why I was scared enough to throw that glass bottle at him.I filed a police report, I warned everyone who would listen to me about him, and I warned her. I did all I could.

 I was too scared to tell this story for such a long time, because if asking for understanding while my mom was dying was twisted into me using my mom as an excuse to get away with being a bitch, then asking for understanding for the outbursts I had after being raped would just be twisted into me using my rape as an excuse to get away with being a bitch. I couldn’t handle the idea of my rape being trivialized as just some excuse–and Mathew is in part responsible for it all, because of that fucking post he made publicly tearing me down. Had he not posted that, I would’ve never lost my support system, I would’ve never gone to that party with Shannon, and I would’ve never been raped.

So I spent the better parts of 2016-2018 telling those involved off for their part in my current situation and blocked them, and the rest rebuilding what I had back in 2009, with resounding success. 

So, there you have it. That’s what happened. Fuuuuuuuucking insane isn’t it. Its over now, none of them can hurt me anymore and Ive once again surrounded myself with friends I can actually trust, so everything’s good now. I still have my low days bc this was yknow, a lot, but I’m doing much, muuuuch better now. 

[womenofcolor15]

WOW, REALLY? Terry Crews Throws Gabrielle Union Under The Bus, Defends ‘AGT’ Amid Investigation + Gabby Hires Orlando Jones For ‘LA’s Finest’

When “America’s Got Talent” host Terry Crews was offered the chance to show support for former “AGT” judge Gabrielle Union (who publicly took up for him during his sexual assault controversy) – he didn’t. In fact, he threw her under the bus, calling “AGT” the most diverse workplace ever.

Get those deets, plus more about how Gabby proves we’re #StrongerTogether with the hiring of Orlando Jones inside…

We want to say we’re surprised by this, but sadly, black women are used to this sort of treatment.

”America’s Got Talent” host Terry Crews appeared on the “TODAY” show where he was asked about former judge Gabrielle Union’s exit from the show after one season. You’ll recall, she reportedly made allegations of a "toxic" and "racially insensitive" work environment behind-the-scenes at the show.

In the interview, the 51-year-old host said since he isn’t a woman, he can not speak on any sexism claims and as far as racism on the show, he has never experienced it.

“First of all, I can’t speak for sexism because I’m not a woman, but I can speak on behalf of any racism comments,” the “Brooklyn Nine-Nine” actor said. “That was NEVER my experience on ‘America’s Got Talent.'” 

“In fact, it was the most diverse place I have ever been in my 20 years of entertainment," he added.

After it was announced that Gabby and fellow judge Julianne Hough would not be returning to the show, there were reports that Gabby exited the show due to its “toxic culture," which included “excessive notes” on her appearance, including accusations that she was told her hairstyles were “too black” for viewers.

Terry said he believes we should “listen to women and always believe women,” but since the allegations were “given by an unnamed source” he’s seemingly on the fence when it comes to speaking out about it. He said "Gabrielle has not made any statements to this day about any of these allegations publicly,” so he wasn’t sure what to say/do. He asked his wife Rebecca King-Crews what he should do and she told him, “If [Union] hasn’t made a statement, why would you?”

The "AGT" host also said he had not spoken to Gabby since the allegations surfaced.

We’d like to note, Gabby hasn’t directly addressed the allegations, however, after her exit she broke her silence with a tweet, thanking everyone for their support.

"So many tears, so much gratitude," she tweeted. "THANK YOU! Just when you feel lost, adrift, alone... you got me up off the ground. Humbled and thankful, forever."

Peep Terry's interview at the 2:45-minute mark below:

Sir, if you're a true alley, you don't have to experience sexism to comment on it.

After Gabby caught wind of his interview, she hopped on Twitter to respond. She first put up a tweet about being thrown under the bus and how she stepped up when he shared his truth. She didn't include his name, but we know who she's talking about.

“Thank u! Cuz girlllllll,” she tweeted. “Truth telling, wanting change & having MULTIPLE witnesses who bravely came forward to let EVERYONE know I didn't lie or exaggerate, really exposes those who enthusiastically will throw you under the bus, forgetting quickly who stepped up 4 THEIR truth.”

"Can someone please ask abt what happens to all that diversity folks are talking about BEHIND THE SCENES. Like, legit...where the hell is all that diversity in the production though homie?," she asked. "In the decision making ranks who control the fate of the diversity in front of the camera?"

Everything is funny. pic.twitter.com/oUaW6lklpi

— Clarkisha Thee Bully (@IWriteAllDay_) January 24, 2020

You’ll recall, Gabby was one celeb who publicly supported Terry Crews when he accused WME agent Adam Venit of sexually assaulting him at an industry party in 2016. So yeah, this is like a slap in the face.

And check it...

When Terry was in the midst of his sexual assault controversy, he said he was surprised by the amount of support he received from black WOMEN.

“To be honest with you when it first happened there was none for a long time. But, I have to say this: the people who surprised me the most were black women,” Terry said. “Black men did not want any part of it.” “All my support came from black women, straight up. And that’s kind of wild. It shocked me. It shocked my family," he continued.

Hmph.

The "L.A.'s Finest" actress then went on to say to question the diversity behind-the-scenes at "AGT," specifically the hair and makeup department. She also said they all had agreed to not speak about the situation until the investigation had been completed, but it seems all bets are off now.

"Let's also talk about where the diversity is in the hair & makeup dept for contestants that DOES NOT reflect all that diversity that hits the stage. Let's Google the exec's that run the show & ask follow up ?? about THAT egregious lack of diversity. Let's discuss the facts," she tweeted.

Gabrielle also proved what solidarity actually looks like.

"American Gods" star Orlando Jones was recently fired from the series. And he claims he was axed from the STARZ series due to the racist new showrunner. In several social media posts, Orlando said his character Mr. Nancy had “the wrong message for black America" and the new showrunner didn't like it, so he let him go.

After Orlando went public with the firing, Gabby hopped on Twitter to request a sitdown with him. And it apparently happened because he now has a recurring role in the second season of "L.A.'s Finest."

"What solidarity looks like. We are SO much stronger together. So happy to work with you my friend! @TheOrlandoJones," she tweeted.

Congrats!

Despite it all, Gabby will continue to fight: 

Folks on Twitter are sounding off about Terry's comments with disappointment:

  Beyond disappointing. Terry Crews could have spoken to his experience without going overboard to discredit @itsgabrielleu. BTW, I didn’t have to know Terry Crews or see what happened to him to support him. Sadly, black women are used to this. https://t.co/2uuQ4Yr6oG

— Jemele Hill (@jemelehill) January 24, 2020

  I wish I could say this is disappointing, but that’s not a strong enough word. As a person who wrote an entire piece about Terry Crews and the lack of support he received from Black men over his assault, I am appalled to see him move like this.

This is garbage, @terrycrews https://t.co/BhLEAgCJh5

— Frederick Joseph (@FredTJoseph) January 24, 2020

  Terry Crews is disgraceful for not only not publicly supporting Gabrielle Union but for choosing that moment to cape for the show. A black woman simply needed your support and you chose that moment to celebrate those who wronged her. No excuse for that

— God's Trombone (@TheBlackCyde) January 24, 2020

  It’s so sick that Black women & Black queers rolled up for Terry Crews while his cishet male peers shitted on him hard for his trauma & at his 1st opportunities he threw queer ppl & BW right under the bus for his comfort in patriarchy, etc. Not even for his survival... COMFORT

— Muting/Blocking = Self Care (@QueeringPsych) January 24, 2020

  Terry Crews is yet another example why I only support black women. I don’t give a fuck. Lmao y’all gon learn one day

— Muscadine and therapy stan account. (@MiAmorAlia) January 24, 2020

  Terry Crews received so much love and support from Black women. It's bullshit the way he is tap dancing and throwing Gabrielle Union under the bus.

— Stephanie! (@qsteph) January 24, 2020

  What's your take?

    Photos: Kathey Hutchins/Shutterstock.com

[Read More ...] source http://theybf.com/2020/01/25/wow-really-terry-crews-throws-gabrielle-union-under-the-bus-defends-%E2%80%98agt%E2%80%99-amid-investigat