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cookinguptales · 2 years ago

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You know... I had an experience about two months ago that I didn't talk about publicly, but I've been turning it over and over in my mind lately and I guess I'm finally able to put my unease into words.

So there's a podcast I'd been enjoying and right after I got caught up, they announced that they were planning on doing a live show. It's gonna be near me and on the day before my birthday and I thought -- hey, it's fate.

But... as many of you know, I'm disabled. For me, getting to a show like that has a lot of steps. One of those steps involved emailing the podcasters to ask about accessibility for the venue.

The response I got back was very quick and very brief. Essentially, it told me to contact the venue because they had no idea if it was accessible or not.

It was a bucket of cold water, and I had a hard time articulating at the time quite why it was so disheartening, but... I think I get it a little more now.

This is a podcast that has loudly spoken about inclusivity and diversity and all that jazz, but... I mean, it's easy to say that, isn't it? But just talking the talk without walking the walk isn't enough. That's like saying "sure, we will happily welcome you in our house -- if you can figure out how to unlock the door."

And friends, my lock-picking set is pretty good by this point. I've been scouting out locations for decades. I've had to research every goddamn classroom, field trip, and assigned bookstore that I've ever had in an academic setting. I've had to research every movie theater, theme park, and menu for every outing with friends or dates. I spend a long time painstakingly charting out accessible public transportation and potential places to sit down every time I leave the house.

Because when I was in college, my professors never made sure their lesson plans were accessible. (And I often had to argue with them to get the subpar accommodations I got.) Because my friends don't always know to get movie tickets for the accessible rows. Because my dates sometimes leave me on fucking read when I ask if we can go to a restaurant that doesn't keep its restrooms down a flight of stairs.

I had one professor who ever did research to see if I could do all the coursework she had planned, and who came up with alternate plans when she realized that I could not. Only one. It was a medical history and ethics class, and my professor sounded bewildered as she realized how difficult it is to plan your life when you're disabled.

This woman was straight-up one of the most thoughtful, philosophical, and ethical professors I've ever had, one who was incredibly devoted to diversity and inclusion -- and she'd never thought about it before, that the hospital archives she wanted us to visit were up a flight of stairs. That the medical museum full of disabled bodies she wanted us to visit only had a code-locked back entrance and an old freight elevator for their disabled guests who were still breathing.

And that's the crux of it, isn't it? It's easy to theoretically accept the existence of people who aren't like you. It's a lot harder to actively create a space in which they can exist by your side.

Because here's what I did before I contacted the podcasters. I googled the venue. I researched the neighborhood and contacted a friend who lives in the area to help me figure out if there were any accessible public transportation routes near there. (There aren't.) I planned for over an hour to figure out how close I could get before I had to shell out for an uber for the last leg of the trip.

Then I read through the venue's website. I looked through their main pages, through their FAQs to see if there was any mention of accessibility. No dice. I download their packet for clients and find out that, while the base building is accessible, the way that chairs/tables are set up for individual functions can make it inaccessible. So it's really up to who's hosting the show there.

So then and only then I contacted the podcasters. I asked if the floor plan was accessible. I asked if all the seats were accessible, or only some, and whether it was open seating or not. Would I need to show up early to get an accessible seat, or maybe make a reservation?

And... well, I got the one-sentence reply back that I described above. And that... god, it was really disheartening. I realized that they never even asked if their venues were accessible when they were booking the shows. I realized that they were unwilling to put in the work to learn the answers to questions that disabled attendees might have. I realized that they didn't care to find out if the building was accessible.

They didn't know and they didn't care. That, I think, is what took the wind out of my sails when they emailed me back. It's what made me decide that... yeah, I didn't really want to go through the trouble of finding an accessible route to the venue. I didn't want to have to pay an arm and a leg to hire a car to take me the last part of the journey. I didn't want to make myself frantic trying to figure out if I could do all that and still make the last train home.

If they didn't care, I guess I didn't either.

If they'd apologized and said that the only venue they could get was inaccessible, I actually would have understood. I know that small shows don't always get their pick of venues. I get it. I even would have understood if they'd been like "oh dang, I actually don't know -- but I'll find out."

But to be told that they didn't know and didn't intend to find out... oof. That one stung.

Because.... this is the thing. This is the thing. I may be good at it by now, but I'm so tired of picking locks. I'm tired of doing all the legwork because no one ever thinks to help me. I'm tired of feeling like an afterthought at best, or at worst utterly unwelcome.

If you truly want to be inclusive, you need to stop telling people that you're happy to have them -- if they can manage to unlock the door. You need to fucking open it yourself and welcome them in.

What brought all this back to me now, you may be asking? Well... I guess it's just what I was thinking to myself as I was tidying up my phone.

Today I'm deleting podcasts.

#I guess it did save me a lot of money #I'll still probably go up to nyc to visit with friends for my bday but I won't go all the way out to brooklyn for the show #and I probably won't need to get the hotel room #and I DEFINITELY won't be supporting their patreon like I was planning lmao #I'll buy myself a new tarot deck for my birthday instead #cw:#disability #ableism

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kaaaaaaarf · 1 month ago

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Sirius, who owns a popular nightclub in NYC, and Remus, who is dragged there by Lily one Friday night, but would really rather be drinking tea in his tiny industrial art studio apartment in the Bronx with his cat. Wolfstar hit it off, and Sirius takes him home—which happens to be a multi-story apartment in an old building in Tribeca that he paid for not with inheritance, but with the money he makes from his legitimate business. Remus has never been less comfortable in someone's apartment, feels like he's getting Punk'd.

Months go by and they keep seeing each other, but Remus has a panic attack every time he goes over because he is slightly afraid of the doorman at Sirius' building.

Remus, panicked and sweating: What if he doesn't let me in? It's after midnight!

Sirius: What, do you think he's gonna make you answer his riddles three before you'll be allowed in or something?

Remus: I dunno, maybe!!! Should I bring him a coffee to say sorry?

Sirius: Sorry for what?!

Remus: I don't know, existing???

He braves the doorman, though, because he's nervous about letting Sirius see his apartment, which in addition to being industrial and the size of a box, only has heat 45% of the time and has a shower rigged over the toilet. He's like no way can I take this fucking model-level hottie anywhere near this dump because it isn't meant to be lived in...but eventually, six months into the relationship he relents and brings him over. Remus is nervously pacing around his apartment, picking up clothes from his floor and Sirius is completely unbothered, more concerned with petting the cat than with how the apartment looks. It turns out that actually, Sirius lived in a very similar apartment when he was first disowned by his family and was starting up the club with a loan from Fleamont.

Sirius: Remus, sit down. My old apartment was way worse—there was actually a hole in the wall behind the bathroom mirror that lead into another apartment. I had to padlock the fucking thing so I didn't get robbed.

Nevertheless, they still spend most of their time at Sirius' place, so Remus starts baking so that he can give the doorman a peace offering for disturbing him so frequently, which turns out to be a hobby he can't really afford.

Remus, wringing his hands: Lily, I don't know if i can afford to be with this guy...I really like him, and he always pays for our dates and stuff, but I am really eating it with all the money i'm spending on the doorman. ☹️

Lily: ...I love you, but you're an idiot.

Eventually, Remus gets over his fear of Gary (the doorman), and they actually become friends. His peace offerings turn into weekly screenings of Bake Off episodes behind the security desk in the lobby. Sirius has no idea this is happening, just that Remus is always busy Tuesday nights at 7pm. He comes downstairs to walk Padfoot one day and has to double take at his boyfriend and Gary laughing about a soggy bottom.

When Gary retires a few years later, Remus actually sobs, but continues to meet him at the park on the corner on Saturday mornings with his and Sirius' daughter.

The end????

(This has been a co-production from me and @pain-in-the-riri who are both absolutely doing the work we're being paid for and not plotting the lives of wolfstar)

#riri tag #wolfstar #DO YOU SEE THE VISION??#marauders #remus lupin #sirius black #r/s

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otakuworks · 2 years ago

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❛ 𝐒𝐄𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑. reborn au

feat. Zhongli x Reincarnated!GN!Reader | PART I | wc. 4.6K

Based on 'See You In My 19th Life' | overview. this webtoon follows the story of a woman who can somehow remember all her past lives.

sum. after a sweet hello, your lips never found its way to say the bittersweet goodbye. because you knew you would always find your way back to him even if he won't recognize you in your renewable lives.

note. some scenes are purposely inaccurate to the canon lore

main.mlist genshin.mlist | xiao ver.

You first met him as Morax, a little child dragon you grew up discreetly meeting at a very convenient time of your day, never knowing what's stored for the two of you.

He first met you as Y/N who resides at the countryside near Mt. Tianheng in hopes to find new things to discover across the vast lands of Teyvat. And he did. He found you.

Young Morax found you crouched under an oak tree, the wind flowing with your otherworldly voice, enrapturing him in blissful comfort.

Perched in the tree branch, he listens intently and let himself melt in your grace. It wasn't the first time he finds you warbling a melodic tune, and each time he comes back to hear more from you, it's always a different song and it wouldn't cease to amaze him how much ditty you know.

He lost count on how often he'd fall asleep with your voice lulling him and wakes up feeling empty as the epilogue of his day is always spent without your presence.

Sometimes he wonders if you know he has been watching you, and if you do, why aren't you approaching him? No matter, young Morax doesn't intend to befriend with you.

But then one day...

"Hello! You must be the boy who likes to hear me sing by the tree."

He was caught red handed, perhaps he became distracted that he didn't realize he's been shamelessly stalking you. He couldn't stop his curiosity to follow you in your way home.

Not only he's been spying on you, now he sounds like a stalker. But you didn't suspect, there wasn't anything to be suspicious of anyway.

"H-Huh? H-How did you know?" He gotta commend you for your keen senses. He's the Dragon between the two of you, which means he's supposed to be the one who has sharper senses.

"You must be good at anything but hiding. I have known you've been following me, but I never get to see you up close, you're really majestic looking, by the way." You chuckled as his poor attempt of masking his flushed face at your compliment.

"I don't mind your company, in fact, I want to be friends with you."

Friends. What a foreign concept for young Morax.

He has heard of that term, it's common among mortals, but he's not a mortal. Does this 'friend' term stretches to immortals like him as well? If so, then he has no reason to refuse.

Says the person who one minute ago thought of every alternative ways to stay out of your way.

He was skeptical at your optimism, most mortals would be astounded at his appearance and try to persuade him to spill whatever secrets he has, but as he got to know you better, he was a bit guilty to categorize you as one of them.

His horns and inhumane features? Young Morax found out you're only fascinated by his unique physical looks. And never doubted it.

"Cool! You have horns just like our boars, where did you get those? Can I touch them?"

"Did you just compare my horns to a pig? Pigs don't even have horns! How disgraceful!"

The sparkle in your eyes quickly died down as it came, and the young Morax feels tight in his chest just seeing your smile turns into a frown. You insulted his pride though!

You mumbled a meek apology but still kept your sheepish smile, a glimmer of hope that one day he'd let you do it.

The next days were spent by you sneaking out your house every midnight to meet up with the dragon, Morax. He's slightly skittish, oddly resembling him that of a cat, which is cute.

You probably shouldn't be calling a literal Dragon cute, legends depicted them as tyrannical creatures who seek treasures.

Ah! Classic children's story to scare the kids away at night, it did affect you in some way.

But you can't help it when he would eagerly look at you whenever he asks you to sing him a song.

You'd sit side by side under the tree, you have to admit he'd either falls asleep amidst your song or asks you for the lyrics so he can sing it to himself too.

You even dedicated a song that lets a certain flower bloom.

"Glaze Lily? What's that?" Young Morax asked with tilted head.

A smile outstretched your lips, "Beautiful, right? It transforms the memories of the land into its fragrance during florescence."

"Really?! Is that why you're always out in the dark?" You chuckled sheepishly, feigning ignorance, "Don't know what you're talking."

You got to know each other, held hands like innocent children, share what little knowledge your pea sized brain can, hug whenever one seeks comfort, eat under the glistening sun.

Morax is... a sensitive individual, albeit rough around the edges, but he's young and still learning, and you're unbelievably patient with his attitude— a quirk from you that he greatly appreciates.

From that, young Morax grew fond of you and it isn't one sided.

He flies by the same tree and gives you random things he finds magnificent, whether it could be a rock he found by the lake or a rare item that no one has ever discovered before.

Well, the legend wasn't lying about Dragons and treasure, for sure

You'd laugh at the strangest things he discovers but accepted them nonetheless. Every object he gives you is worth something.

This has been part of your routine for days, weeks, months, even years maybe. You don't know how much time has gone by whenever you're with him and you never bothered to count.

Before you know it, the two of you are almost in young adulthood, he grew up to be a fine man, much unlike you were expecting. Nothing changed from your friendship, until now.

You were taken by surprise when he suddenly blurted out one day

"I want to show you what I see from up there one day, Y/N."

He gazes at you much differently when he looks at you when you were younger. There's a glint of promise in his eyes that you can't pinpoint, it sent shivers all over your nerves.

"You can just fly me up there, Morax. I'm sure I'm not heavy." You muster a smile in an attempt to ease your quickening heartbeats.

He never gave a reply, he only stared at you so intensely that it feels like he's poking your deepest and innermost thoughts.

The way he stares at you never fails to summon the tickling butterflies in your stomach and the blood on your cheeks. You merely regarded that as your hormones, anyone would be flustered if someone they're close to stare at them like that.

You should've known better that nothing in your world stays permanent. The only thing you remember after that day was his twisted look of desperation to keep you alive and tear stained amber dyes trying to get the last image of you in his memories.

"N-No... Y/N please stay with me. D-Don't leave m-me just yet." It hurts you more than the numbing pain in your abdomen to see him broke down like a cornered prey. So helpless and vulnerable.

"I-I'll always be w-with you, Morax..."

So cruel, just when you've begun to realize the burgeoning feelings you have for the Dragon, fate took you away before you have the chance to confess.

Should you be selfish to confess your feelings to him? If you do, it seems like you'll be punishing him an endless torture ahead, and you would never wish Morax to suffer for eternity.

You only smiled and caressed his horns, even in your deathbed you're glad you died in the arms of the man you ever loved.

At the last moment, you heard the anguished wail erupts from his throat as he clutches your form closer, begging and crying for you to come back, to not leave him like this, that he needed you, that he loves you. His pleas fell on deaf ears, for you weren’t there to hear him anymore.

But it became clear to you that he reciprocated your love.

It came a shocking twist when you opened your eyes you can hear multiple cooing sounds from around you. Didn't I die in his arms? Where am I? Turns out, you were reborn. But not as Y/N anymore and you were given a surname.

Unfortunately, the Celestia isn't so forgiving. You were suffering from an unknown illness that took away your second life at such a young age.

You trained hard and learned martial arts in your third life as you were born from a family whose tradition is to produce well-trained warriors in the future.

Fourth to eight life came by like a blur, there were times when you get to lived as an innocent child only for it to be ripped away a few years later with your past memories resurfacing.

You stopped counting after it hits a dozen, born in different class, society and unnamed nation. There's no point of it.

All you want is to look for Morax, but will he remember you? Will he even recognize you as Y/N? You're no longer the kid he grew fond of. No, you're much different than before.

What about him? Decades have past, does he still know of your name? You could've been a fragment of his childhood that he dare not talk about with his new friends.

Will I make your life more difficult by trying to reconnect with you, Morax?

Those thoughts haunted you for nights, often occuring in your dreams.

But what can you do, you're so far away from Mt. Tianheng, you don't even know if the village you lived in still exists nor do you know if Morax still visits the tree you first met.

Even if you did meet him in your new life, you ought to stay as acquaintances.

Aiding him in the shadows and lessening his burdens within your power.

In your hundredth life, all of your training in your third life is proven useful at the moment. You're known as the infamous warrior with no name that took down the monsters around Teyvat, you were revered to the people in the Guili Assembly.

War is threatening to wage amongst Gods and mortals alike.

When it came, no one is safe in and out of the battlefield. To survive they must fight tooth and nail, paint the lands in sea of red and play the game of thrones.

It was gratuitously morbid, gruesome and unjust. A macabre of series of deaths surrounded your every wake, your hundredth life is the epitome of a living nightmare. Horrifyingly memorable.

You were at the sidelines, watching as the war unfold, keeping tabs on Morax's allies and eradicating whatever threat they face.

That's when you came across the stunning Goddess Guizhong, the Ruler of Clouds, Goddess of Dust. A very close companion of Morax whom he met at the Guili Assembly along with the others.

She's capable and quick-witted, a type of peculiar person Morax wouldn't hesitate to be friends with.

As of the moment, a claymore is alarmingly closing its gap towards her, ready to slice her open.

Then you heard him scream, a cry of a man who's about to lose everything he has gained of.

That cry sent flashbacks of his tear-stained cheeks. No, you don't want to see him like that again! You'd do anything to chase away that vulnerable image of Morax, he deserves happiness and love.

Your feet went autopilot and swept away the Goddess out of the way, severing your lower limbs in the process and instantly killing you. Your eyes opened and you have started your new life.

Was Morax relieve that Guizhong lived? Did he wonder why a stranger would save her? Did he ever ask who you were? Did he... recognize you at the very least?

Your new parents panicked as they tried to appease the crying infant in their arms. Unbeknownst to your pained heart.

You saw for a brief moment before your demise how Guizhong's plausible absence will affect him. He will mourn her death as much as he lamented yours. For decades or centuries, you know he has been scarred by your passing.

You don't want him to go through that again. It's a different pain you feel when you see him tearing up, you rather get minced by a claymore than to watch him break down.

He garnered the reputation of a tyrant— but you knew better that Morax grew up with compassionate heart, he appreciates anyone no matter how insignificant they think they are.

Which is why you hold yourself from meeting him. He may not remember you, but he will certainly get attached to you once you had your way to his heart.

And a dragon who can outlive you in any lives will only suffer more from your death.

You dedicated your lives in living peacefully, learning history and new things as humanity evolves.

You vow to never fall in love if it isn't Morax you'll spend your mortal life with.

Even if he has someone he can fall in love with.

"Have you heard about the land Lord Morax and Lady Guizhong are building in Mt. Tianheng?" Gossips are everywhere about the infamous partners who survived the Archon War, there's no mouth that has not utter their names, and you're no exception.

A grin spreads over your lips as you sip your tea with elegance, "I've heard, I haven't seen them in person but the rumors about them guaranteed they're ambitious people with good hearts."

This has been a hobby you never knew; praising Morax to elate people's opinion about him. It's your small contribution to his flourishing nation.

You want people to love and respect Morax dearly just as you loved him in your childhood.

You prayed to the new Archons for Morax to find someone he can love and lean on. Someone that can be his source of strength to keep living. Someone much better than leaving him with death.

Now that he found someone he can be with, your goal in your next lives is to protect Liyue's history.

From the names of ancient relics and objects, war waged by the Gods, Nations that were built underneath the once blood soaked lands, fallen heroes who are forgotten— you know all of them. You're openly willing to offer tutelage to the inquisitive.

You sighed at the thought, it certainly will be lonely in your part. Immortal gods can still die— a death in which they'd leave their memories behind and start anew. Morax will eventually cease to existence with lovable Nation and Guizhong to remember him.

And you? Countless past lives yet you never found true happiness, and none of them was worth to remember for anyone.

Part of you feels happy for Morax finally moving on from your death eons ago, but you're still human so you're susceptible to those horrible impulses of bitterness at a basic level.

But you don't want to be a person who looks at Guizhong with jaundiced eyes just because you couldn't have Morax, so you suck it up and move on the fact Morax is in love with another.

At least my sacrifice isn't a total waste.

"Aren't they? I've met Lady Guizhong, she's such a beautiful and soft spoken woman. She and the Lord of Geo are a perfect match. I wish the two of them eternal blessings."

A tug at your heart left an unpleasant feeling, your brain tried to reason that at least he's with someone that'll love him more than you did. That can appease your bitter aching heart a bit.

How ironic. You built a nation where you first met me.

And showed her what you can see up there like you promised me.

Is that how you honor my death, Morax?

"Wow! You sure do know many things, Y/N!" The floating emergency food expressed her awe in your display of knowledge and the traveller couldn't agree more with her, "She's right, you never cease to surprise us."

Their exclaims were followed by your enchanting laugh, "I'm glad I can be at your service, Honory Knight."

You were simply ethereal to look at, you maybe a mortal like the traveller but the Blondie thinks otherwise.

Paimon and her travelling buddy met you by the Starnach Cliff when they were attempting to subdue Dvalin. Jean and Diluc already know you're part of the Adventurer's Guild as you often visit Mondstadt from time to time.

They didn't expect you to join them in their excursion in Stormterror's Lair, it turns out you're a great addition to the team.

You befriended with the traveller after the whole Stormterror fiasco and catch up with Kaeya.

You don't stand out the most in the crowd, you can blend in with everyone and no one would acknowledge your existence. But the traveller can sense the weight of the wisdom you withhold.

It almost feels like you're one of the Seven...

"Is there something else I can help you with, Traveller?"

"Huh?! Oh... I— Uhh... You've been telling us stories and fun facts about Mondstadt. If you don't mind, can you tell us about Liyue?"

For an ephemeral moment, the traveller saw your facade crumbles and slowly morphed into a nostalgic expression.

"Hmm. I'll tell you a quick introduction. Liyue is built in Mt. Tianheng after the Lord of Geo attained one of seven seats, unlike the Anemo Archon who's known to not show himself, he descends down once a year to give blessings to the people of Liyue."

"Exactly how Venti told us, but more detailed."

"He sounds a lot more of a decent God than Tone-Deaf Bard."

Her statement elicited a quiet snicker from you, "I'll be off then, I'll see you around soon." Paimon's expression deflated, "You're not coming with us?"

You shake your head, "I'll visit you when I can, until then I hope for your safe travels."

You forced a smile and took a different path from the traveller, as their figures disappear in the horizon, you felt your smile slip up as the sun whisks past the mountains turning to dusk.

Solitude in the dark has been part of your daily routine, you come and go whenever you feel like it, not knowing when to return.

The excuse you told to Paimon isn't entirely a lie, you couldn't bring yourself to go in Liyue when there's active Fatui agents scattered around the vicinity.

Let's just say you're not in good terms with the Fatui. Who isn't?

Nevertheless, whatever curse you have continued to persist in your thousandth life. You roamed around Teyvat and tell stories that even historians don't know.

Repeated lives were lived by just you traversing in each corners of Teyvat that even Archons never knew it existed.

Along the way, you've come terms with your feelings and settled it down like a dormant volcano. Morax is your first love, you enjoyed reminiscing the memories you made with him, you keep those memories locked up in the depths of your mind and often recount them in particular leisure time of the day.

You still love him, and you'll always be by his side whenever he needs a helping hand, but enough is enough, you've suffered enough to your own idiocy and fears. It's time to move on.

Morax continued to strive forward because he has changed, for the better of course. If you want to continue living the next lives of yours then you need to change too.

You met new friends and companions that you begin to trust and have fun with, the traveller and the emergency food included. It wasn't lonely as you thought it would be.

Sometimes you wonder why do you have such curse bestowed upon you. Did the Celestia punish you for a crime? Did you touch a forbidden relic in your first life? Is there a way to get rid of it?

You stopped in your tracks and you gaze up in the sky.

Am I the only one with such curse?

Damn, you really need to get your priorities straight when you have so many unanswered questions.

Basking the remnants of the ever glowing star, you turn around to walk the path that leads you to the Land of Eternity.

A new journey awaits you as you skid through the mycelium path.

Rex Lapis has died.

What a year starting with the news of a tragic death of an Archon.

Fret not Liyue citizens, Rex Lapis assumed the form of Zhongli as a consultant in the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. In all honesty, he thinks you would facepalm on how poorly delivered that news was.

Zhongli now blends in with the mortals, often strolling to acknowledge the accomplishments he has done as an Archon.

There were too many sacrifices he made just to achieve such title and godly powers. It's uncountable.

Whenever he strolls down the streets of Liyue, there's never a day that he is not reminded of the fact Mt. Tianheng is the very foundation of Liyue. It serves as a reminder that you are his pillar when intrusive thoughts start to linger in his mind.

Oftentimes, your face is only a blur in his memory, no matter what he does he can't seem to remember your face, but your name has been engraved on his mind for eons.

He misses hearing the sound of your name leaving his lips. He misses how ignorant you both were to the world's suffering. He misses your mesmerizing voice that lulls him to sleep.

Whoever fellow Archon listening to his complex thoughts must have heard him and granted his not-so-impossible wish.

"Hey look. Doesn't that sound like a story Y/N has told us before?" A child(e)— no, a floating fae pointed at the storyteller.

But Zhongli couldn't care less about whoever she was pointing. Did he hear her right? Was it just his ears deceiving him?

Y/N... that's your name.

That's the name he longed to hear again.

Why in the seven nations of Teyvat would they mention your name? Is it just a coincidence that someone has the same name as you? No, that couldn't be it.

Something flared inside him, it's been awhile since he felt this excitement, it's not far fetched when he became your friend.

With no recollection, he became friends with the traveller and the emergency food floating companion.

When he asks them about you, an array of hope filled his entire being and he swore his Dragon feature almost burst into existence

Y/N L/N, a member of the Adventurer's Guild, he's certain you've been in Liyue if you know about its rich culture.

But where are you? He wants to go find you. Hug you like when you were kids. Sing him songs. Bring you random things he can find. Speak the words that were left unspoken when you died.

So many questions brooding his mind; are you really Y/N? If so, were you reincarnated? Does that mean you don't remember him?

The elation he felt dropped. Right... he shouldn't be disappointed if it turns out his hunch is wrong. Even if you're not the Y/N he was expecting, he wants to know you as who you are and not compare the similarities and differences you have with the Y/N he knows.

"Oh yeah, Y/N mentioned they'll be visiting Liyue soon, Mr. Zhongli." The Traveler quipped, assessing the abrupt change of emotions on the consultant's face at the mention of your name.

Paimon and her travelling buddy can't help to wonder if you two are acquaintances, or perhaps something more than that. Zhongli seems to be expecting your arrival from now on.

"Is that so? Thank you for informing me, Traveler. I shall see to it that their stay will be comfortable." He smiled.

Stay in what? In the Funeral Parlor? The Traveler sweat drop while Paimon is tempted to point out that's Verr Goldet's job. Good thing their companion put a hand on her mouth and excuse themselves

There's no time to stall! He thought.

He's determined to check it himself, it can go two ways and Zhongli won't be petulant of the result.

Archons forbid if he ever finds you, because he will not let you go.

>> PART 2

©OTAKUWORKS | 2022

#zhongli #genshin impact #genshin zhongli #genshin angst #zhongli x reader #zhongli angst #morax #see you in my 19th life #webtoon #crossover #genshin crossover #zhongli fic #genshin impact angst #reborn au

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sizzlingchaosprince · 9 months ago

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The Toy's favorite Child

Notes: This is the first time I'm doing such thing so I'm really nervous XD I didn't know what to put into the background of the drawing so I didn't put any. Maybe I'll edit it soon. Do forgive me for my shading, I'm still learning(trying to)

Synopsis: After starting to live in PlayCare, one creature you became friends with grew a liking to you...

Warning: PLATONIC, headcanon + little story, reader is 12-14 years old, reader is a chill teenager

It's been a year since you got into the PlayCare, passing through the security with laid-back face and leaving the staff confused. They kept you because you seemed useful for them...

You were quite chilly and relaxed, reserved and smart. Also, because of your personality you were almost the same with Cat Nap from cartoons. Maybe that's why you became quick friends with Smiling Critters. With most of them, at least...

The big purple cat was almost never appearing like others from his party. And this interested you.

After a week or so you finally met him face-to-face. You were as calm as always, but your heart was pounding from excitement. You said 'hi' for politeness and introduced yourself, waiting for him to do the same.

Guess what? His face didn't even shift. He continued staring at you with his dead eyes.

After understanding that you won't get an answer from him, you tried to talk about something else.

But he disappeared in blink of an eye.

You were quite disappointed, but you still had the same urge to get to know the living toy better. You knew it'll be a long while...

It was worth 3 months to make him sit and listen to your rambling for 10 minutes. It was worth more months to make him spend at least an hour with you. It took even longer for him to let you stay near him and sleep, leaning onto the puppet. But it was worth the pleasure you get from his warmth and company.

Even though you never heard him talk, it's enough for you to be near him. It's good to talk about any nonsense which randomly comes to your mind and have a listener who won't judge you. It's also good to take a great nap in his fur or stay in complete silence, thinking of your own thing.

The staff, of course, sooner found out the relationship between you and the purple cat puppet.

They tried to use you to their own benefits and new information, but instead you composed some lies which sounded like truth to tell them(Cat Nap helped you a little sometimes, nodding or shaking his head if the lie sounds truthful or not).

When the scientists were starting thinking about taking you for the test next, Cat Nap started to monitor you to make sure you won't end up in the Game Station.

It definitely wasn't him who knocked out the staff members right behind your back. It definitely wasn't him who let out some scratching noises in Home-Sweet-Home. Also, of course, it definitely wasn't his sharp gaze you felt on your gut 24/7.

You liked to use the hair brush on the purple furball. It doesn't move away so you can say that he's at least neutral to your activity(we don't talk about his really quiet purring).

[Now. The small story]

It was a normal day like any other one. More specifically, night. However, this week was quiet strange: the staff members of Playtime Co. except the workers from the PlayCare appeared more often in front of you. When they started talking about 'test', they randomly passed out because of the red smoke. You knew it was one of the Smiling Critters you were hanging out with for a while, but you didn't know why was he doing it.

You were currently sitting with your back leaning against the living cat plush, brushing your companion's tail you gently patted with your free second hand. The only thing that bothered you in that peaceful time was the fact that the purple cat wasn't purring at all. It was staring at you with its dark eyes. Sooner after, you finally asked him about this:

— Is something wrong, Cat Nap?

It didn't answer. Instead, the living toy just stared at you with expressionless eyes, not moving an inch. You weren't intimidated by the stare at all, so you just continued brushing the long tail. You weren't hoping for an answer anyway, but still a small, almost impossible dream was remaining in your heart.

The silence was broken by the raspy, low voice coming out from Cat Nap's voice box.

— The Prototype... Will Save Us.

You flinched.

Wow...

This is the first time he ever said something to you. It was surely a progress for your friendship.

You stared at him with wide eyes for a moment before shifting your attention back to the tail. You shrugged with your shoulders, your face had a relaxed smile.

— I don't know who the Prototype is, but if they helped you somehow, I think they're my saviour too. You're like a home to me.. I can't even imagine what would it be like living without you here!

You chuckled, patting the fluffy tail while Cat Nap looked at you with the same stare. However, something in his eyes changed... Maybe his gaze gained a little more... softness?

He stared at you until you fell asleep on him again. A few minutes of him sinking into his thoughts have passed, the toy putted his head on his paws, wrapping his tail around you like a blanket and soon enough closing his eyes. You would call it the same night-time scenario with Cat Nap in the next morning, because you didn't know that he was comfortably purring, nuzzling himself into your warmth last night...

Notes: OH MY GOD I DID IT :D I'll maybe do part 2, but without promises

Anyways, thank you for wasting your time reading my first-ever-made English fanfic. Do write me some comments about my errors if you find any, I will appreciate it since it'll improve my writing skills.

Have a nice day/evening/night!😘

#poppy playtime x reader #poppy playtime #poppy playtime 3 #cat nap #cat nap x reader #platonic #child!reader #fluff #own work #own drawing #first post

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selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs · 5 months ago

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Hellooo!! Ik I just requested but I can't help it- I love ur fics Soo much!!

Can I request a teen!reader who is touch starved and their love language is physical touch? They are an absolute cuddle bug. Their parents (step dad+ bio mom) don't really give her much affections and reader is a quiet and shy kid so she doesn't ask for them either way. Though her quietness was the effect of their father dying when they were 6. Their father was the closest to them. If possible can I get this with Ranpo, Poe and Nikolai? And maybe some head cannons for the rest?

I want to say so much more but I don't wanna bother you😔

You don't bother me, so, don't worry.

And I am sorry l, that it takes so long for me to do your request.

Hugs for a good mood

Self-Aware! Platonic! Nikolai Gogol x Fem! Teen! Reader x Self-Aware! Platonic! Sigma

Self-Aware! Platonic! Ranpo Edogawa x Fem! Teen! Reader x Self-Aware! Platonic! Edgar Allan Poe

Description: Sometimes, all you need is a hug to make a good day into a perfect day.

Warning: OOC. English is my second language

__________

A large, colorful box with “Hugs for a good mood” written on it was finally ready.

Paint the TV box, decorate it, write the phrase... It took two hours, despite the fact that your dad helped you. Well, he did most of the work, while five-year-old you were coloring pictures you want to put on the box.

You wanted to climb into the box, but dad stopped you. His big hand ruffle your hair.

"You can't play with this right now. Wait for paint to dry, [Y/N]. Okay?"

You nodded and hugged his leg.

"Okay, dad."

He chuckled and picked you up, giving you a hug.

You giggled. Live was fun and full of hugs.

________

The next year he died. And shyness replaced your easygoing nature.

________

It's been few years since your dad died. You were a teen now and were going to school.

The school bell rang, you pick up your bag and books. The day was over.

You walked down school hall. You saw, how your classmates were leaving in groups, while talking. You were alone. Too shy to make friends, you were on your own.

You bit your lip and walked faster. You just want to go home.

______

Your mom and stepdad were at work. Of course, they always have their phones with them in case of emergency, and you also weren't a kid anymore. But, you really want to have someone near right now.

You wanted a hug.

Your mom was a good mom. She loves you. You aren't holding it against her, that she remarried. Your step-father was a good guy. He respected you, didn't force you to call him dad, didn't force spending time with him. He and mom let you get used to the new situation in your own speed.

You were grateful. But, if only... If only they hugged you more often... Much, much more often.

They loved you. But didn't like hugs.

And you were too shy to ask.

You ate your lunch and went to your room. You will do your homework and will be free to do whatever you want.

And will try not to look in the "Hugs for a good mood" box you still have in your room. That now was in the corner and full of books.

_________

Few hours later. In BSD World

________

Sigma felt, how Little Light landed in his head, cuddling him. Guiding Light's voice, coming from above, followed.

"New Sigma's card has such a great attack. I am so lucky I got it."

Her voice, as usual, sounds warm and soft.

Sigma smiles. The portal soon will be ready, and they will finally see Guiding Light in person. Sigma wonders, how their first meeting will her will go. Sigma was lost in thought and didn't notice, how Nikolai, with a butterfly net, was sneaking up on him.

Little Light left Sigma's head the moment before Nikolai swing his net. Little Light flew away, and Nikolai's butterfly net was on Sigma's hair. Nikolai quickly freed Sigma, and with a quick "Sorry, Sigma

", chased after Little Light.

Sigma rubbed his temples. Little Light was just a floating blob of light, it didn't have body. Anyone who tried to pet it (a.k.a. Oda and Fukuzawa), had their fingers go through Little Light. But Nikolai still tries to catch Little Light (with net) and pet it.

Well, whatever keeps him occupied.

And Guiding Light will have so many head pats from Nikolai.

Sigma chuckled. Soon.

_________

Few months later

_________

You were in your new room. The last few months were wild.

First, BSD Cast were real and adopted you before you met them in person. Second, after a very long discussion with your parents, they agreed to share custody over you. With daily phone calls to mom, weekend visits to mom's house, with spending half of the holidays with her.

The relationship between BSD Cast and your parents were good. Even great. Koyouou and your mom quickly became friends, and your step-father and Steinbeck watched games together from time to time.

Your family became bigger. If only there were more hugs.

A knock on the door interrupt you thought.

"Hey, [Y/N]! Can I come in?"

Ranpo's voice was cheerful. You clear your throat and answered.

"Yes!"

The Best Detective in the World ("you can call me Big Brother Ranpo") skipped into your room and stopped right before you. Ranpo's grin was huge.

"[Y/N], there is something I want to ask you." Ranpo stopped talking, waiting for your response. You tilted your head.

"Um... What it is?"

Ranpo opened his eyes and opened his arms. Did he...?

"Can I give you a hug?"

Your world froze. You can't believe it. Ranpo was asking for a hug.

You nodded and step forward. Ranpo hugged you immediately. You hugged him back and almost melted in the warm embrace.

Ranpo gave you a head pat.

"Don't feel shy to ask for a hug from me, [Y/N]."

The hug from Ranpo was nice. The normal day became better.

_______

You were scratching Karl behind the ears, while having a conversation with Poe (you can call me Superior Older Brother Edgar).

He was telling you about his last book, that go quite well among readers.

You nodded, while Poe was describing ideas for his new book.

"It sounds great, Poe! Can't wait to read your new book!"

Poe grinned.

"And you will be a first one to read it."

Suddenly, Poe stood up from his armchair and walked to yours. He opened his arms for a hug.

"Can I?"

You nodded slowly and stand up. Karl climbed on your shoulders, rubbing his head against your hair. You hugged Poe. He gave you a tight squeeze.

"Here you go, little sis."

A normal day became a happy day.

_________

You were exhausted. All the school work was tiring you up.

You were in the library, finishing your homework. You put pen down and looked up. You closed your eyes. Soon... The school soon will be over.

You heard steps. Then familiar voice.

"Tired?" Sigma hummed. You just nodded.

"Want a hug to make it better?" You nodded again.

The next second, Sigma was hugging you, ruffling your hair.

"Here you go. Go away, tiredness, stop making [Y/N] sad."

You smiled, leaning towards Sigma's hand.

A normal day became a good day.

________

You went to the kitchen to grab some snack. While you were in a middle of making a sandwich, Nikolai entered the room. He looked at the almost finished sandwich on your plate.

"So, I am late for making you a snack? Well then... Want to have a hug? For no reason."

Nikolai opened his arms, inviting you.

You smiled and hugged him. Nikolai chuckled.

"Thank you, sis, for being you."

A happy day became a perfect day.

______

Your life was happy. Full of family members, familial love and hugs.

_________

Headcannons

🐯 Atsushi likes give you side hugs. Will let you hug his paws, when he is half-transformed.

📒 Kunikida will mostly pet your head for doing a good job.

🩺 Yosano will give you hugs for taking good care of your health. It includes you brushing your hair and teeth.

🌨️ Junchirou will hug you just to make you happy.

👩🏻 Naomi likes to give you a "friend hug".

🍵 Kirako isn't a cuddler, but she will sqeeze your cheeks.

🛏️ Katai will let you hug him and his futon, but will be very clumsy, if he hugged you.

🐄 Kenji will carry you during hugs.

🐰 Kyouka is another shy one. You will give each other a side hug.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa isn't a cuddler, but he will give you headpats and praise.

🦀🪢 Dazai will gush over you while hugging you.

💉 Mori is another one, who stuck with headpats.

🍷 Chuuya's hugs a tight and makes you feel secure.

🌂 Kouyou's hugs are warm. You feel safe each time she hugs you.

🇫🇷 Verlaine will give you small and quick hugs.

🎧 Rimbaud's hugs are extremely warm. He will try to stay close to you during winter.

🚩 Flags will have competition between each other on who will have more hugs with you.

🧥 Akutagawa will give an awkward head pat.

🔫 Higuchi's hugs are soft but quick.

🚬 Hirotsu will hug you for doing a good work at school.

🔪 Gin will give you less awkward head pats.

🩹🧲 Tachihara's hugs a tight and protective. He takes his role of big brother very seriously.

🍰 Elise's hugs are sudden but soft.

💎 Karma is too shy to hug you.

⭐⭕ Kyuusaku are another sneaky hugger.

🍋 Kajii's hugs are tight but stiff. He doesn't know, how to hug.

🍛 Oda gives "dad hugs".

💰 Fitzgerald will be another one, who gives "dad hugs".

🐋 Melville will often ruffle your hair.

🐙 Lovecraft will give you even more awkward head pats.

🍇 Steinbeck likes to pick you up during hug.

☕ Lucy's hugs are gentle and warm.

🪶 Alcott is too shy, but will give you side hugs.

👒 Mitchell's hugs are soft but quick.

♊ Twain's hugs are bone-crushing.

✝️ Hawthorne prefer to give you hand pats.

😷 Pushkin will ruffle your hair.

🫖 Goncharov's hugs are careful and protective.

🐀 Fyodor will brush your hair.

🦇 Bram will let you hug him as long as you want. You can grab into him like a koala and he won't bat an eye.

⚔️ Fukuchi is another one with "bone-crushing hugs".

👧👩👵 Teruko's hugs are sudden and long.

💧 Jouno's hugs are soft and makes you feel calm.

🌸 Tetchou's hugs make you feel like you are behind a stone wall, that will protect you from any danger.

⛩️ Taneda will just pet your head.

💻 Ango's hugs are long, with him ruffling your hair.

🥷 Tsujimura's hugs are strong and secure.

🕶️ Ayatsuji will playfully scoff, while hugging you. His cats will rub against your legs.

👻 Mushitarou's hugs are awkward, but soft.

⌚ Gide will give you soft headpats.

🐉🍎🍏 Shibusawa will give you side hugs.

🐈‍⬛ Natsume will let you hug his cat form.

🤖 Adam's hugs are mechanical, but enjoyable.

👧🏻 Aya hugs you, when you two manage to win games.

🚸 Kousuke, Yuu, Katsumi, Shinji and Sakura will quickly hug you while you five are playing.

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taxidermycanine · 10 months ago

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5 WAYS TO HELP WITH SPECIES DYSPHORIA AS A THERIAN (with and without gear)

- please note that most of these are focused mainly on being a wolf therian, but i'll try my best to make it more inclusive to others.

1 •

my personal favorite, wolf quest! this one does cost money, so this isn't for those who don't have the money/don't already have the game. it really helps me feel more connected to who i am. you find a mate, raise pups, hunt prey, defend your den and pack from predators, and there's even a multiplayer option for you to play with your friends. :o)

(and yes, you can customize what your wolf looks like. all NPC wolves in the game have different personalities for immersion, including you, your pups, and your mate)

please note that the game is still in development! they plan to add a saga where you can live constantly with your pack and continue with new generations each year (and no, you don't HAVE to pass away). you can toggle whether your mate dies or not, if you play on easy you can avoid your pups getting sick by reloading saves if you're sensitive to that, there are constantly new updates being brought out that make the game feel more realistic each time and the development team are incredibly sweet. if you have the money i highly recommend this game, wolf therian or otherwise.

2 •

documentaries. a wonderful way to not only feel more connected to your theriotype(s), but to also learn more information about them! my favorite thing to do when i'm stressed is to wrap myself in warm blankets, turn off my lights and put on a documentary to calm myself down. bonus points if you DO have gear to wear during this, if not that's okay too.

i also like to have my plush friends join me so i can act like they're my pack :o) it's a nice way to feel less lonely as i watch. this also works if you're a domestic cat therian, have your plushies be your clouder! no matter what animal you are though, never feel less valid for wanting your stuffies with you during this. it doesn't matter if your theriotype isn't a social animal in the wild.

if you're an aquatic therian of some kind, i think a good idea would be taking your phone in the bathroom with you and setting it up outside of the tub to watch whilst you're in the water! (or shower if you don't have one, you can also use a kiddie pool outside in the warmer months). PLEASE remember to be safe during this though, if you worry about getting your phone wet then instead find some blue blankets and pretend it's the ocean!

3 •

going outside to where your theriotype resides in naturally. of course this won't be for everyone, since a lot of the time trips can end up being quite costly. something that i like to do is go to my local forest whenever i have the time to do so! i find it refreshing to sit by the stream and play in the water with my mate.

if you're a domestic dog therian, ask to go on a walk around the neighborhood with your friend! (or hell, go by yourself if it's safe enough, you're a free dog, you can do what you want). even as a wild animal i still enjoy this, so don't feel ashamed if you're ALSO a wild animal who wants to do things that domestic dogs do. it doesn't make you any less undomesticated.

if you're an animal that's used to deserts, i recommend going to where you can access sand (e.g. a sandbox at a playground, asking for a small sand tray to play in as a gift, a day out to the beach if you live near one). i also find that dried dirt that's very damaged can feel sort of similar to sand!

if you can't go outside for whatever reason, then there's always ways to make your bedroom feel similar to where you would be more comfortable. if your theriotype lives in dens like caves and underneath trees, make a blanket fort and pretend it's your home! if your theriotype rests in a burrow, make a tunnel with some blankets from the top of your bed all the way down to under it (if that doesn't work, pretend that anything below your bed is underground, and anything above your bed is the surface).

4 •

dressing in clothes that are the same color as your theriotype. i have this fluffy hat with ears that feels very affirming for my species dysphoria, paired with my favorite dark sweaters, warm pants and my tail. if you don't have any gear, don't worry! you don't need to have any to complete an outfit. sometimes clothing textures can also be affirming. for example if you have smooth skin like a whale, a bathing suit can feel similar to blubber. (if you have gender dysphoria, i recommend either full body bathing suits, or wearing pants on top of it and a jacket to help yourself feel more affirmed). i wear fluffy clothes because my fur is fluffy :o) it helps me, personally, but this might not be the same for everyone!

5 •

studying the behavior of your theriotype and trying your best to imitate it to the best of your abilities with the body you have. this can be as simple as copying how they act around each other as a family (for example wolves who are mates will rest their chins on each other to display affection), and as difficult as trying to vocalize what sounds your theriotype makes.

if you wanted to try the latter, i recommend looking at vocal exercises online before as a lot of creature sounds can and will strain your voice, i promise you that warming up your chords will not only help you sound clearer, it'll ensure that it won't take as much effort to do!

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juniefruit · 9 months ago

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☆- biker bf minho -☆

y'all, happy almost friday. winter gloominess is kicking my butt fr. p.s, I like motorcycles, so this is totally not self indulgent...

word count: 946

Before you met, he was closed off and not really all that personable. His friends pestered him about it, too. He would never go back to living like that, though. Just looking at you brings a smile to his face without him realising it. Has he gone soft? Just for you. One thing he loves you for is that you understand his humor. He’s naturally sarcastic and witty. He can let his guard down around you and truly be himself. He knows when it’s time to joke around, or when to just chill out and take it easy.

Bonus points if you have a bike of your own, he would eat that up. Like, you get to go on little motorcycle adventures together? Sign him up. He loves when you can ride side by side looking cool af.

Granted, he also loves having you on the back of his bike. He tries to act like having your arms wrapped around his waist doesn't affect him, but of course it does. He’s a sucker for physical touch, perhaps even touch starved before you started dating. When he has to speed up and he can feel your arms tighten… he has got to stay focused on the road.

He looks absolutely godly in his tight leather riding gear. The jacket hugs his torso and shoulders just right, and the pants… (redacted)

If you have your own gear already, cool. If you don’t, he would love to go shopping with you to find something. It has to be perfect (his own words), because safety is the most important thing.

So there’s this thing called a Cardo, but there's other brands too. It’s like a bluetooth speaker you can put inside your helmet, it can play music or act as a microphone. He got you one immediately. He couldn’t wait for Christmas, or Valentines, or your birthday. He’s too impatient for that. He enthusiastically ran up to you one day, with the box in his hand. For you!! He exclaimed. He helped you set it up, and afterwards, to test it out, he insisted you try talking through it in separate rooms. He was all smiles and giggles for the rest of the day.

He’s not big on PDA, but he’s fine with holding hands or wrapping his around your waist in crowded spaces. Also, he definitely puts his hand on your lower back when he has to squeeze by or grab something near you, muttering a small ‘excuse me babe’.

When you’re riding seperately, he will try to annoy you through the intercom. He’ll spew dad jokes, or honestly just make random noises. Until he figures out you muted him and he gets whiny and upset. You pull up to a stop light when he flips up his visor hastily. “Yah! y/nnie, did you mute me? What if I had something suuuper important to say?”

Even though you constantly tell him to be careful… He knows his limits. As a biker, it’s in his blood to do at least a couple risky things a week. Whether it was a dare, or just to show off, he will pop a wheelie on the road. A couple times a month, he meets up with his other biker friends just to hang out. At first, you were intimidated. I mean, being surrounded by 8 biker dudes doesn’t sound too inviting. Minho promised they were nice, or at least some of them tried to be. He begged and whined, promising to take your share of cleaning the house for a week. When you finally complied, it really only took about 15 minutes but to Minho it felt excruciating. Minho gave you a soul crushing hug while repeating thank-you’s for a good while. Lucky for you, they were actually quite nice, but they take some getting used to.

He definitely custom ordered sticker packs of his cats to plaster onto his helmet. He was so ecstatic when they came in the mail, and he spent the rest of the day showing off his newly decorated helmet to you.

He definitely sends you funny videos or selfies of him in his gear while he’s out. He’s a victim of “helmet confidence”. Meaning, as long as nobody knows who he is, he’s 100% doing funny weird shit. It fuels something in him when he sees you flustered or embarrassed, it’s just a part of his nature.

Motorcycles do require a bit of regular maintenance (if you want them to run properly) and over the years, Minho has learned how to do repairs on his bike at home. It’s cheaper than always going to the shop. He’s well versed in what his bike needs. He’s always offering up his help for your own bike. On bright spring days, the garage to your condo is pulled up, and the bikes are parked in the driveway. The bright green leaves are practically glowing as they shimmer against the blue sky. Minho’s got on a tank top and shorts; with a few tools by his side. When he calls you over, it’s because he made the executive decision to show you how to fix this one specific thing he’s working on. You lean in close to him. His teaching voice is soft but firm as he’s always checking to see if you’re still paying attention. You’re more so paying attention to the way his biceps ripple when he moves, or the tiny sweat droplets forming on his brow.

I would like to think that his motorcycle would be all black with a few mint/teal accents. It’s a sports bike, something along the lines of a Ninja or GSXR.

If you like drabbles like this, check out my masterlist :3

#stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids drabbles #stray kids imagines #stray kids oneshot #skz x reader #lee know x reader #minho x reader #lee know imagines #lino skz #stray kids x you #stray kids x y/n #lee know #lee minho

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geekgirles · 6 days ago

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Hot Take

Season 3 should have revealed Eva is a demigoddess instead of Ruel.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm actually quite happy with season 4 focusing on her origins and Madagaskan, even if that was clearly only introduced to set up Flopin's character arc during the upcoming Waven series. But the thing I can never seem to get over is how irrelevant the Cra actually are in season 3. Their arc is literally to be rescued/to escape and to give birth (in Eva's case).

Because, let's face it, their relevance in the season hinged entirely on being Tristepin's family. Eva in particular, regardless of how cordial Echo was to her, seemed to have no value outside of being Tristepin's wife who's carrying his third child, who was later revealed to be an extremely powerful demigod.

Meanwhile, poor Flopin's kidnapping didn't even make sense because he just isn't a demigod like his siblings. Yes, he is Iop's son, but he's not an Iop, so he couldn't inherit any of his father's divine powers. As opposed to Élely and Pin, who already displayed theirs at 5 years old and before being even born, respectively. Hell, that ended up being the crux of his character in season 4! His insecurities over not being as extraordinary as his family, especially his siblings!

Yes, you could say Oropo's real plan besides killing the gods was to make Yugo's friends his, and that's why he wanted Eva and Flopin around. But considering he didn't seem all that contrite over Adamaï almost causing Iop's next reincarnation while he couldn't even bring himself to make Amalia age (even though he was not above breaking her spirit so she'd be easier to manipulate), it's fairly obvious he cared more about keeping certain members of the Brotherhood near than others. Which further proves he only kidnapped Eva and Flopin because of their connection to Pinpin.

And let's face it, between that and how out of focus they were compared to the Iops, that's just such a huge disservice to their characters. They deserve so much more than to orbit around Tristepin.

Which is why I believe Eva should have been Cra's daughter and Oropo's target instead of Ruel. Even though nothing really suggested her divine origins before, they could have always hand-waved it and have that explain her craziest feats, like how she was able to keep up with two demigods even while heavily pregnant or her formidable archery skills. Because, come on, until Madagaskan was introduced, the only relevant Cra in the show were Eva, Cleo, and Flopin. It's not like by the time season 3 dropped we'd seen any other member of their race display the same level of dexterity so as to make Eva's prowess being divine in nature not make sense.

Also, in could retroactively explain her exceptional beauty, since most Cra we've seen are actually fairly plain-looking.

Besides, you're telling me that out of the original members of the Brotherhood of the Tofu, only the boys are the ones related to gods? Come on. Is a little bit of parity that much to ask?

And let's face it, Ruel being Enutrof's son doesn't bring anything new to the table other than some shock value. Like, I get he's always been hinted to be more than meets the eye, but being a demigod doesn't really add much to his character.

Hey, maybe I just don't know much about Enutrofs since they don't give me brainrot compared to other classes, but compared to the rest of his kind, Ruel isn't all that unique either, except for how utterly greedy he is. His powers and attacks, while impressive at times, can never reach their full potential because he just doesn't pay tribute to Enutrof, so they remain relatively weak. And though being a demigod would explain how long-lived he is, that falls flat as well when Arpagone seems to be just as old as he is and his grandma's even older.

Again, longevity could be a standard Enutrof power I'm just not aware of. Still, it pretty much proves my point, doesn't it?

Not to mention, it's not like changing Ruel's status as the group's surprise demigod would really change anything from his storyline in season 3. They could have perfectly had Arpagone be the Enutrof demigoddess whose condition to play a part in Oropo's plan was to be allowed to keep her husband even as she ascended to godhood. Hence, you still get your flashback episode and an excuse to capture Ruel and have Sipho replace him to drive a wedge between Yugo and Amalia and kidnap the latter.

But no, let's go with the plot point that won't be touched upon ever again.

And speaking of things that wouldn't necessarily change just because Eva were a Cra demigoddess, you could still keep Madagaskan's role in season 4!

Maybe just make it so Eva and Cleo are actually half-sisters with the same father but a different mother (or vice versa, given the goddesses' apparent distaste for getting pregnant themselves). While I'd personally prefer it if Madagaskan simply had a tryst with Cra and then he fell in love with his late wife, if you're into drama, Eva could always be the result of an affair but his wife chose to take her in and raise her as her own, anyway. Hence, you would have another reason why Madagaskan went along with her last wish, out of love for her and to repay her kindness and forgiveness.

(Or you could enforce his love for his wife by having him be the one to accept her other child and to make sure both her and his own daughter had a better life).

And from then on, everything could play out exactly like canon.

In fact, Eva being semi-divine would also add another layer to Cleophée's inferiority complex and feelings of inequacy compared to her older sister. Much like Flopin, of course she could never catch up to Eva no matter how hard she tried, she isn't a demigoddess!

Which would make Eva's acceptance and pride over her abilities all the more meaningful too (even if by then they wouldn't know the truth).

And speaking of Flopin, his season 4 storyline would remain the same, too. After all, even if he would now be related to Cra, he'd still be a demigoddess' child first and foremost.

As @cocogum explored in one of her analyses, the children of demigods are their own can of worms. So far, we don't know anything about Kali and Poo's baby, but we do know that Goultard's children certainly didn't inherit immortality of any kind, so it wouldn't be far-fetched to assume they didn't inherit his divine powers either. In other words, Flopin could still feel left out—even with more reason, since now he would be the only "non-exceptional" member of his family—and choose to follow his grandfather in order to find his own path.

I guess what I'm trying to say with all this is that while Amalia might be my blorbo and Yumalia my OTP, I still care for all the members of the Brotherhood of the Tofu, especially Eva. And I can't really forgive that while Pinpin still had focus and issues of his own by virtue of being the reincarnated Iop god, Eva's character was ultimately reduced to being his wife and mother of his children when she's actually so much more than that.

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howi99 · 1 month ago

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A story of a Knight and a Yokai (part 1?)

(Btw, if you are a touhou fan, go read Osana Reimu. And if you are not, still go read it. It's the entire reason why i'm writing this)

RK: *waking up on a road* ... Wha... I'm alive? ... Guess the poison wasn't strong enough to kill me. *Get up, still feeling weak* Damn, what DID she put in that soup? It's like being inside a bullhead... *Looks around, not seeing Juniper... Or anything remotely recognizable* Is that... A temple? Where am i?

Nothing but the wind answered him

RK: Tsk, that's just great. No, really that's just perfect. I so wanted something new in the pile of crap that is my current life. Now i need to find Juniper and go save those kids before the cat can... *As he spoke, Jaune felt like something wasn't right* Uh... *Looking at the sky, something was missing* wait, where's the tree?!

*crack*

RK: *turning to where the sound came from, his broken sword now unsheathed* Ok, seems i'm back in the real world. So Grimm's are back in play. *Small smile* Can't be harder than a manticore or a dragon.

A woman comes out from the forest

RK: ... Or i could also just be paranoid. *Sigh, re-sheathing his sword* Who comes there? And can i also get a direction to the nearest town or city?

The woman looks at him, perplexed

RK: ...! Oh uh yeah, the armor. Don't worry, i am not a bandit, i'm just lo-

Woman: Aren't you afraid of me?

RK: ... Why, you don't really radiate bloodlust or anything, so i don't really get why i should be afraid.

Woman: *looking at him even more perplexed* You... Do you know who i am?

RK: No idea.

Woman: Aren't you from the village?

RK: *look at himself then at her* I look like i just came out of a fantasy book, why would i come from anywhere near here?

Woman: But it doesn't make sense! How did you survive the Yokai?

RK: The what now?

Woman: *roll her eyes* Vampire, ghost and all that.

RK: ... Sorry to ask a weird question, but... Are we on remnant?

Woman: What?

RK: ... And here i hoped i was finally out of hell. *Sigh* Well, can i get the direction of the tree? I need to go kill a curious cat.

Woman: ... What tree? And cat? You mean Chen?

RK: Who the hell is Chen? No i mean the literal curious cat. You know, a trickster psychopath but in a literal cat body?

Woman: I mean... I never heard of him. As for the tree, i mean there's the forest of magic, but it's not like there's one specific magic tree.

RK: Isn't this the ever after?

Woman: ... No? This is Gensokyo.

RK: ... Tell me, is the moon shattered?

Woman: *sigh* Why would it be?

RK: *to himself* So either i'm before the gods left or... *Look at the woman* Last question, are the brother gods still living among men?

Woman: ... Who?

RK: *crestfallen, thinking to himself* I can't believe it... First i have to kill a friend so the world doesn't end. Secondly, i fell through the world and ended up in fantasy land so i could fuck up again by getting sent back in time. Thirdly, i waited centuries to get back to my timeline but discovered i was the hero from a book, try to follow the story only to get poisoned and now this? Is this a joke? Can life stop being a bitch for once?

Woman: *noticing the knight looking unwell* uh... You ok?

RK: *let himself fall face down to the ground, his aura protecting him by reflex* I think i will lay down and let myself die.

Woman: ... *Sigh, then mumble to herself* How low the most feared yokai has fallen. Can't believe him doing this... *Approach Jaune* Oi, get up.

RK: *face in dirt* Lef meh di.

Woman: *sigh again, then knell down to pick Jaune up like a sac of potato* You can't just die in the middle of the road. What would the people coming to the temple would say?

RK: *says nothing*

Woman: Tsk... Name's Rumia, if you were wondering. *Waiting for an answer* ... You are supposed to tell me yours, you know?

RK: ... I don't remember my name.

Rumia: Ah! What a joke! You look no older than 30, no way you forgot-

RK: *sigh* I'm centuries old, my aura kept me young by repairing any damage made to my body.

Rumia: *interested* What's that?

RK: What's what?

Rumia: Aura.

RK: Ah... Of course, new world new rules... Aura is the manifestation of the soul. It can protect, heal and make attacks more powerful.

Rumia: *nods* Seems useful.

RK: Yeah, there's also something called a semblance, which is derived from aura. It's an ability which is unique to every aura user with some exceptions.

Rumia: Hm, we have something similar here. But why would humans need this?

RK: ... *Sigh* Fine, i'll explain to you everything about my world, can you put me down?

Rumia: Will you lay down and wait for death again?

RK: I'll... find a better place.

Rumia: Oh, but can you wait before explaining everything? I know someone who will really want to listen to this!

RK: ... Sure.

Rumia: *putting him down* By the way, if you forgot your name, what should we call you?

RK: *shrug* I don't really care anymore. But the book i'm from called me the Rusted knight.

Rumia: *looking at his armor* Doesn't look that rusted to me.

RK: *shake his head* Well, they meant my sword... I assume.

Rumia: The broken piece of junk? Why didn't you throw it away?

RK: *thinking back at what he did* Long story and a part of my life i will never forget.

Rumia: Yesh, not a fan of talking about your past i see.

RK: Oh i don't mind talking about all my adventures, just... Not what came before.

Both of them start walking

Rumia: ... I think i should tell you that i'm technically a dangerous Yokai who eats humans.

RK: ... I see.

Rumia: You don't see surprised or upset.

RK: Well, you didn't try to eat me and i can see you are trying to make me less... Hateful toward myself? So i'm guessing the technically mean either you eat bad people, which i don't care for or you stopped... Which i'm fine with.

Rumia: *placing her arms behind her head* Second one. Got beaten half-dead by the drunkard who runs the place *sigh*

RK: *nods* Sounds rough. So she got you on a leash or-

???: Rumia!

RK: *look at the top of the stairs, seeing a woman wearing... A box for a mask?* ... I assume she's the drunkard?

Rumia: *smile* Yep, she's the one.

Crazy Woman?: *sigh, shaking her head* And here i was wondering where you were. Reimu was panicking when you bolted away. *Now noticing Jaune* Oh? You brought company? I never saw you in the village.

RK: I'm not from around here.

Crazy Woman?: Yeah, like half the village.

RK: Half the village comes from a world where animals talk, fruit make you travel in time and a giant tree keep bringing people back from the dead with a better body but no memory?

Crazy Woman?: ... Uh... N-no?

RK: *shrug* Eh, was worth a shot.

Crazy Woman?: *look at Rumia* Is... Is he... You know....

RK: I'm not mad... *Seems to think a bit* Nevermind, i meant i'm not that crazy. Living with no human interaction for centuries did drive me a bit crazy. Just enough to accept a lot of weird things as normal. Like your head accessory... Is that a donation box?

Crazy Woman?: Speaking of! *Walk down the stairs* You got money for the temple?

RK: *look inside his pockets* I got a copper piece, two silver drakki, a couple of gold coins and... Well, now i know where she found the poison. *Take the silvers and give them to the miko*

Crazy Woman?: *take them quickly* Oh oh! Nevermind the first impressions, i think i already like you, now!

Rumia: *getting impatient* Can we get going?

Crazy Woman?: Oh yeah, of course! *Goes back the stairs, humming a happy song*

RK: She seems happy.

Rumia: Well, you just gave away the equivalent of what she gets in a month.

RK: ... *Shrug then start walking up the stairs* Fair enough, i'd be happy too... I think? I completely forgot the value of money since silver was the least valuable in the ever after.

Rumia: *following him* Then what's the most valuable?

RK: Mithril, but i didn't have any on me. At least in money form.

Rumia: You got some?

RK: *point at his armor* It's mostly made of it. It takes years to rust and even then it only takes a bit to get rid of it. It's a good insulator, so it keeps me warm when it's cold and fresh when it's scorching hot. It's not really stronger than steel, but with my aura, i don't need it to be.

Rumia: *nods*

RK: It can also repair itself. Slowly, but it's better than having to wait for a smith to be available, you know?

Rumia: I honestly can't since i don't wear armor.

RK: Speaking of, what is the technology level here? We have scroll or?

Rumia: Scroll?

RK: Phone?

Rumia: In the human world, i think they have those? I'm not sure.

RK: Electricity and heated water?

Rumia: oh yeah, we got those.

RK: *sigh in relief* After all these years, a nice hot bath would be nice...

#jaune arc #touhou rumia #hakurei miko #touhou x RWBY #i am really not expecting a lot of view but i wanted to make something after watching osona reimu #rwby #rwby au

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strangeandoff-putting · 10 months ago

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why I'm happysad that they let Numa be the narrator in Society of the Snow.

So if you, like me, have been more than a little obsessed with the story of Uruguayan Air Force Flight 571 for a very, very long time, your stomach probably dropped like mine did when the narrator introduced himself as Numa Turcatti. (My immediate thought was, "why would you do this to us?!") If you went in blind, I feel for you!

But while the film gave us a version of Numa, since it's from his perspective what it doesn't really give us is the group's perspective on him. He comes across a bit like an outsider, and although, yes, his only surviving friend was Pancho Delgado, he wasn’t an outsider for long at all. On the contrary. So, here are a few excerpts from the books that tell you more about what he was like and how much they all loved him, because I feel like that’s important.

From Alive, Piers Paul Read:

Next to Parrado, Numa Turcatti was the most generally beloved of the boys. [...] Since he had known few of the boys before leaving Montevideo, it was proof of his strength, simplicity and complete lack of malice that he became so loved and respected by them.

On celebrating Numa's birthday while trapped under the avalanche:

The boys gave him an extra cigarette and made a birthday cake out of snow. [...] Many would have liked to give him a better time on his birthday, but instead it was he who improved their spirits. "We have survived the worst," he said. "From now on, things can only get better."

From Society of the Snow, Pablo Vierci:

‘When I talk about Numa, I can’t help but cry,’ says Coche Inciarte. ‘He’s the best person I’ve ever met in my life. However tenderly I cared for those who were losing heart, Numa did it much better because he never got tired. He was constantly aware of everyone else’s distress. He radiated peace, he never gave up, and when he came near me, I felt like Jesus Christ himself was among us, with such mercy and compassion in his eyes. I don’t know where he got his strength.’ ‘I could never imagine him living in everyday life, because I met him and I loved him in that torment of the Andes,’ says Coche. ‘He had a hard time eating, like I did. We ate the bare minimum in order to survive. I lost one hundred pounds, he lost more. And just like me, his leg became infected after the avalanche. We operated on our legs together with a razor blade. But he deteriorated more quickly than I did, because he had given so much more; he had been too generous.’

Moncho Sabella:

Numa taught us about the anonymous heroism of giving more of himself to others than he reserved for himself. In that balance between solidarity and selfishness, which decided whether you lived or died, he tilted the balance in favour of the others to the detriment of himself. [...] And when the avalanche came and covered the plane, the one who worked the hardest, the one who removed the most snow so that we could come back to life, was Numa. Again, he was exceeding his own limits. [...] In the end, his immune system was so devastated that he got one infection after another. We gave him antibiotics and the doctors on the mountain attended to him every day, but finally he left us. And with him, we all died a little more.

Gustavo Zerbino:

I always remember Numa up there, full of despair, when he told us that he would rather die watching the sky, walking, instead of ending life immobilised in a cave of broken metal. For that reason, after the avalanche, he kept digging and removing snow without rest until he burned himself out with exhaustion. He always thought that his time had come but he wanted to work until the final moment, doing whatever he could to help. I cared for him all those days; I saw how he was hurried to the brink of death, with no defences, getting one infection after another. I went up to him and first I gave him a kiss on the cheek to greet him and asked him how he was doing. He just stared at me with a kind of infinite peace. He never complained. But Numa was quickly deteriorating: from that physical strength and vigour he had had at the beginning, he finished as a skeletal dying boy. He held on to his characteristic qualities until the end though. He was that same stoic guy when he was strong and when he was wasting away.

‘Gustavo Zerbino didn’t tell us the whole truth [about the expedition] because he didn’t want us to be discouraged. When I asked Numa about it, he couldn’t lie and he told me: “As far as we went, all you could see were more mountains.” But even so, he always wanted to be an expeditionary. “I want to go,” he told me, even though I knew at once he could never go, he was too exhausted and too hurt.’ So Numa approached Daniel Fernández, knowing that he had influence over the others, and he tried to convince him: ‘I can do it, Daniel, please believe me. I can do it.’ Daniel recalls, ‘When I told him that his injury made it impossible, he started working even harder than ever, like a bull, shovelling snow to unbury the plane after the avalanche to show that yes, he could do it.’

Finally, from Alive, after Numa died:

On this particular afternoon, Javier Methol lay at the back of the plane. "Be careful," he said to Coche as he rose and stepped over Numa's body. "Be careful not to step on Numa." "But Numa's dead," said Parrado. Javier had not realised what had happened, and now that he understood his spirits dropped completely. He wept as he had wept at the death of Liliana, for he had grown to love the shy and simple Numa Turcatti as though he were his brother or son.

I'm not sure the Numa we see in the film is quite the same person that he actually was on that mountain, but I'm so, so glad that he got a voice. He fought so hard for them all.

So, yeah. In the immortal words of Jake Peralta,

#numa turcatti #society of the snow #alive #andes plane crash #Uruguayan air force flight 571

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dentiststoothfairy · 1 year ago

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🎻 Violinon here!!! I will so happily gush about him with you, the more love the better!! ☺️ I hope you’re having a lovely day and getting time for yourself, you always deserve it!! ✨✨

This request is for The Pic-Squad (especially Nene!!) with a friend who loves taking them out places, treating them, baking for them.. The whole shabang!! They’re getting affectioned!! 🥺 (And this is as always whenever you feel up to it!! 🥹 You’ve done so many requests for me already!!!)

[𝚃𝙷𝙸𝚂 𝙷𝙰𝚂 𝙱𝙴𝙴𝙽 𝙳𝙴𝙻𝙴𝚃𝙴𝙳 𝙱𝚈 𝚃𝚄𝙼𝙱𝙻𝚁 𝚃𝚆𝙸𝙲𝙴.]

🔫💣🔪 𝐏𝐢𝐜𝐨'𝐬 𝐒𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐝 🔪💣🔫

𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐚 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦!

🔪𝐍𝐞𝐧𝐞🔪

OH MY GOD?? SHE'S SO EXCITED.

NO NO I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND. SHE'S ECSTATIC.

It is HARD being the ONLY girl in this group. Like, these boys don't understand the BEAUTY of days out!! Like. They don't wanna get their hair done, don't wanna try on new clothes? It's like living with two broke hobos!!

So if you ever give her the opportunity to take her out? It'll genuinely be really fun, for the both of you.

Retail therapy is her favorite kind of therapy so expect to have a ton of new, expensive clothes.

You two get to chat, gossip and just have a nice day! Nene would spoil you as much as you spoil her. God a day out with Nene would be so much fun. Memories would last forever.

And if you're baking for her? She'll happily eat it BUT PLEASE. PLEASE. LET IT BE DAIRY FREE. SHE'S LACTOSE INTOLERANT AND YOU ACCIDENTALLY WILL KILL HER.

She wouldn't tell you that, though.. It's probably Darnell who does. Lucky you.

Bro, just give her that princess treatment and she'll love you forever.

𝐏𝐢𝐜𝐨

When you drag him shopping, he groaned so much. He's so used to carrying Nene's stuff, he expected you to do that to him too.

Not that he doesn't like spending time with her, or you. But.. It's just annoying. He could be spending this time getting high or something.

Wait.. You're getting something for him?

He looks at you like you're insane for a minute, just searching your face for any kind of sarcasm... What's the catch?

He feels pretty bad taking your money, he insists that something small will do. Again, he's used to Nene draining the ever loving FUCK out of his bank account. He has no idea how this kept happening.. How did she keep figuring out his information??

He ends up just getting lunch with you. He'd rather just spend the time chatting with you. He's not big for matrialistic things.

And he may be reluctant to take your money, but he absolutely will take your food. Good GOD your cooking is good.

Also, take him to a shooting range! That's where you'll get the most fun. Although, pico doesn't do the safety precautions and probably gets you kicked out-

𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐥

He also thinks you're dragging him to carry your stuff. What has Nene done to these poor men??

But, he also takes you clothes shopping, but unlike Nene doesn't prioritize things via expense. He is actually reliable. If it's comfortable and you feel nice in it? We're getting it.

Introduces you to some pretty neat designer companies though.

And, honestly? He'd bake with you. You two could chat recipes, he loves baking. Cooking too. Exchanging foods after you two both went nuts in the kitchen. Just uh.. Don't let him near the stove top. He gets a little trigger happy with the gas.

And his dream chill? Sitting in a park, setting fire to a tree and watching that shit burn. Hope you're chill with that!

And if you're looking for a little more thrill? You WILL be running from the cops afterwards! So!

#anon #anon ask #darnell picos school #fnf pico #nene picos school #pico imagines #picos school #pico x reader #pico #platonic

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lucy90712 · 11 months ago

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hii

pls could write a Jude Bellingham x reader YN is Jobes best friend since they were like 5 and YN moved next door, she always had a crush on Jude and everyone could tell but he always turned her down and then he sees her tryna move on and he’s like what’d u think ur doing

WC: 2.8k Ever since I was born pretty much I've known the Bellinghams. When I was born Jude was a little over a year old and then Jobe was born about a year after that. Our parents were friends before any of us were born and they lived just down the road from each other so all of us have been around each other pretty much from the day we were born. As we grew up I only became closer with both Jude and Jobe but as we've gotten older I have gotten closer to Jobe as he's around more and I just feel like I have more in common with him than I do with Jude as he's older so he can always do things before we can.

One of the other reasons I think I'm not as close with Jude is because I've had a crush on him for a while, when he moved away to go and play in Germany my feelings for him started to change. It seemed like he became a man all of a sudden, he wasn't the Jude I used to know from when we were in our early teens he was different, all of a sudden he was the most attractive man I'd ever seen. Whenever he came home all I could do was admire him and the muscles he'd clearly been working hard to get as well as his face which just seemed so perfect. It was obvious to everyone that I has a crush on Jude even Jobe made fun of me a few times for fawning over his brother. There came a time when Jude sat me down and tried letting me down gently saying that he thought we were better off as friends which hurt a hell of a lot at the time but I've since got over that disappointment.

Sadly I never got over my feelings for Jude instead I just distracted myself with other guys who were nowhere near as good as Jude and honestly half of them I didn't even really like but it was only a bit of harmless flirting I never went any further as I just didn't want to. I know one day I'll meet a guy I love as much if not more than Jude and then I'll be happier than I am now pining over a guy that doesn't even like me back. It's been a while since I've seen Jude as he's been so busy with the end of the season which has actually helped me quite a lot as not seeing him and trying not to pay much attention to things he posts has kept him out my mind. All of this has been on purpose too as my birthday is today and I didn't want to only be thinking about Jude on my birthday.

With it being my 18th birthday all my friends have convinced me to go out clubbing with them. They've all turned 18 already and have been out quite a few times and they want me to join them. There has been times they've tried to convince me to get a fake id but I refused as I'm not bothered about going out plus it wouldn't work anyway as quite a few people here know who I am because of my friendship with Jude and Jobe so I never bothered. Sadly Jobe can't come and enjoy my birthday with me as he's not 18 yet but I promised I'd spend the rest of the day with him as he said he didn't want to not see me on my birthday. We've spent all of our past birthdays together and I couldn't be the one to ruin that tradition plus I think I'll enjoy spending the day with Jobe more than I will then going out.

~~~~~~~~~~

As it's my birthday I wanted to sleep in for a bit longer than I usually would but that didn't happen as the sound of my phone notifications woke me up. When I looked at it my home screen was flooded with notifications of texts and Instagram posts from my friends. I answered a few texts before there was a knock on my bedroom door and my mum came in with breakfast for me which she'd spent her morning making. She had to go to work but she promised that she'd give me my presents later before I go out which didn't bother me as I don't need any presents I just want to enjoy my birthday.

Once my mum had left I went back to looking at my phone and replying to people, at some point I went on Instagram and saw that Jude had tagged me on his story and I don't think I've ever clicked on a notification so quickly. He had posted a picture of the two of us from when we were younger covered in mud from where we'd been playing outside in the rain with a caption wishing me a happy birthday. It made me feel all warm inside that he bothered to post something instead of just texting me as he doesn't post much that isn't to do with football.

After I'd caught up on my notifications I got myself out of bed and got ready so I could go and see Jobe. He wanted me to go to his so I text him just before I left the house so he'd be expecting me. Seeing as its only a few minutes down the road I was happy to walk plus it's such a nice day that I wanted to get outside and soak up the sun even if it's only for a few minutes. When I arrived I didn't even get the chance to knock on the door before it swung open and Jobe tackled me straight into a hug. Jobe has always been like this with me we are just so close that we are always excited when we get to spend time together especially on special days like birthdays. Eventually he let go of me and allowed me inside but he quickly covered my eyes as he said he had a surprise waiting for me in the living room. I was a bit nervous as you never know what a Jobe surprise will be but I had a bit of faith that he wouldn't do anything I'd hate on my birthday.

It felt like we walked forever but eventually we stopped and Jobe instructed me to open my eyes. It took a second for my eyes to adjust but when they did the first thing I saw was a smiling Jude sat on the sofa. If it were possible my jaw would've hit the floor as Jude wasn't supposed to be home he was supposed to still be in Germany for another week but there he was and I definitely wasn't seeing things.

"Happy birthday y/n/n" Jude said

"What are you doing here I thought you still had to be in Germany" I questioned

"You didn't think I'd miss your 18th did you plus I may have lied to be able to surprise you" he said

"I'm so happy you're here it's been ages since I've seen you" I said

He got up and gave me a hug before ushering me to sit down while him and Jobe ran off somewhere. They came back a minute later holding far too many presents which they piled on my lap so that I couldn't move anymore. I tried telling them off for getting me so many unnecessary presents but they insisted that it was necessary as in their words you only turn 18 once. Seeing as they were both so excited about it I opened the presents in whatever order they agreed on which did involve a bit of arguing but we got there in the end. They got me so many nice things that made me feel so loved but also a bit bad as I could never afford to do the same for them.

"Thank you guys so much I really appreciate everything but you shouldn't have gotten me so much I'll never be able to top or even match that" I said

"It's ok we don't need you to do anything for us we just love having you around" Jobe said

"Aww you're going to make my cry" I said

"Don't cry instead tell me what you've got planned for today" Jude said

"Well first I'm hanging out with you guys but then my friends convinced me to go out tonight" I said

"Is it just you and your friends going?" Jude asked

"Yeah me and I think 3 of the girls the rest can't make it" I said

"Well I'm coming with you whether you like it or not I'm not letting you go out for the first time without someone to keep you safe" he said super seriously

"I'll be fine Jude I won't even drink that much" I said

"I don't care it's not safe for you to be going out with just a few of your friends I promise I'll leave you be I just can't let you go alone" he said

"Fine you can come but be prepared the girls will go crazy" I laughed

~~~~~~~~~~

I spent the rest of the day with Jude and Jobe just hanging out like we used to do all the time when we were a bit younger. They even got me a cake which they definitely aren't supposed to eat with their diet but they did and made me promise not to tell anyone. A bit later I had to leave to get ready but not before Jude cornered me to make me promise to text him when I was ready to go and he'd come over so we could go together. I was still anxious about him coming as for one I don't want to get drunk and say something stupid to him but also I didn't want him to be on my mind all night. Tonight was supposed to be the night I get to let go and enjoy myself and maybe find a guy I like to flirt with but I feel like I can't do that with Jude around as my mind will be on him the entire time. I appreciate his concern about me going out but I can handle myself and I'd be fine without him. That being said it's been a long time since I've really spent any time with him so it will be nice to have Jude there.

Once I was home and getting ready I was texting my friends to get their opinion on my outfit as I don't really know what to wear out. They helped me get it down to two options but once I told them Jude was coming they picked the shorter tighter dress straight away as they know I like Jude so I guess they are being good friends. Seeing as they picked a nice dress I decided to go all out on my hair and makeup too and if I do say so myself I looked pretty good. After I'd done a few touch ups I text Jude to let him know I was ready and headed downstairs to put my shoes on as I knew he'd be a few minutes.

Jude arrived and honked the horn of his car to get me to go outside (let's just pretend he can drive) so I made my way to the car slowly trying to not fall over with my heels on the gravel of the driveway. Jude must've noticed my struggle as he got out the car and helped me into the passenger side of the car.

"You look beautiful" he said

"Thank you" I said feeling my cheeks turn pink

"You know you don't have to drive if you want to drink we can get an Uber" I said

"No it's ok I won't drink I'm only going to make sure you and you're friends are ok" he said

"They're all really excited that your coming I think they might spend more time with you than they will with me" I laughed

"I won't let them you'll barely notice I'm there" he smiled

We arrived at the club and true to his word Jude disappeared as soon as I was with my friends although he did instruct me to put any drinks I had on a tab he'd make for me as he didn't want to me pay for anything on my birthday. He'd gone before I could argue with him so I didn't bother I just did exactly what he told me to and got myself a drink before heading to dance with my friends. As I was dancing my friends told me that there was a guy who wouldn't stop staring at me so I managed to sneak a glance in his direction and he was actually really cute. He noticed me looking at him and shot me a smile before making his way over.

Straight away he complimented me but not just on my outfit which made me let down my guard a little bit as I could tell he was genuinely interested in me. Once he found out it was my birthday he wished me a happy birthday and offered to buy me a drink which I was happy to accept. As we both sipped on our drinks we started properly talking and we just got on like a house on fire. We actually had a few things in common and he was such a nice guy that it was hard not to get along with him. Once we finished our drinks he took me back to the dance floor and we danced together. To begin with he didn't have his hands on me but I grabbed his arms and put his hands on my waist as I was feeling little more confident than usual.

I was really enjoying myself dancing and laughing with this guy my mind was only thinking about him and not about Jude at all. It's been so long since I've thought about any guy in front of me and not compared him to Jude, it was honestly so nice to have finally found a guy that made me forget about Jude and that clearly had the same feelings that I did. My enjoyment was short lived though as not long after I felt someone grab my arm and pull me away, I was about to punch the person until I got a look at them and realised it was Jude and honestly I still kind of wanted to punch him as he was supposed to leave me be and I was actually enjoying myself.

He dragged me all the way out of the club and back to the car which is when he finally let go of his grip on my arm and I just stared at him. Neither of us moved nor said anything for a good few moments until I decided I wanted to go back in if he wasn't going to talk but as soon as I turned around he grabbed my arm again and brought me back to face him. Again the staring ensued and I was really starting to get annoyed.

"What's going on Jude if you aren't going to say anything let me go I was enjoying my time with that guy" I said

"I can't let you go back in" he said hastily

"Tell me why then as I'm not going to stand here forever" I said

"Because I'm jealous ok I don't know why but seeing you with that guy made me realise that I've been lying to myself for a long time I do have feelings for you I've just been trying to tell myself I don't as I don't want to ruin our friendship" he admitted

"What you have feelings for me?" I questioned in complete disbelief

"Yeah I do I know that I made it seem like I didn't see you that way but I have had feelings for a while I just didn't want to change things between us or make things awkward with you and Jobe as I know how close you both are but I can't keep lying I want to be with you y/n" he said

"I think it's pretty clear that I still have feelings for you and I really want to give us a go I know it will be different but let's be honest Jobe’s been wishing we'd get together for ages so I'm sure everything will be ok" I said

"Then will you be my girlfriend officially?" He asked

"I would love to" I smiled

"Now let's go and have some proper fun" he said taking my hand to lead me back inside

#jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham imagines #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham #football imagine

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 8 months ago

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AITA for telling my Grandma I'm not going to have a specific conversation with her and just walking away?

So context, I (28) am currently between jobs because one of my ex-coworkers was the asshole who got me fired, and I haven't found anything new.

My mother (50) and I both live in my Grandma (80)'s house which is divided into an upstairs and a downstairs. Grandma lives in the downstairs. So do my mom and sister. I live alone in a two bedroom upstairs which belonged to my late aunt.

Right after my aunt died, I wanted to clean the apartment, organize, donate, toss, keep her stuff. To make sure everything gets where it'd ought best go, but my mother told me I had no right to go through my aunt's things alone and sort keepsake from takaway; if I was to do anything it was to be with her.

Well, three years of me trying to get my mom up here to sort through it with me because I want to respect her wishes, and my stuff accruing in a layer over top of my aunts stuff because I can't get rid of it, and the apartment is a lifetime and three years mess. My mom never made the time to do what she told me I wasn't allowed to do without her, me respecting these wishes which she probably doesn't even remember. I've been living up here too afraid of trespassing against my aunts memory to clean the cobwebs full of her red hair. Because my mother said, I had no right to do it.

And that cleaning anxiety is on top of executive dysfunction, depression, having too much shit, being a sprawler type adhd, and working a 40 h/week 'part-time' retail position. I didn't have it in me to clean by myself, and the mess kept getting worse and no one would substancially help me no matter how much I asked. Not my mom and not my sister (who gets a pass because she's got post-exertional malases from Long Covid).

Now fast foreward to two weeks ago. My mother final finds the motivation to clean the upstairs apartment because she's got a boyfriend now, and they wanna have sex upstairs where my grandma can't hear it. They didn't ask me if it was okay or anything: just decided that my space is now OUR space because it's convinent to her. I don't really care, and I'm annoyed, but finally someone to clean the fucking apartment with. She said, two weeks ago that he'd be coming around in about four months time. We spent the day getting a lot of cleaning done. Not anywhere near all of it, but a lot. And I've finally gotten what I see as permission to start sortitioning my aunts things. I'm pacing myself cleaning on that four month timetable.

And then today she bursts into the apartment to announce that BF will be here in a week, and she starts hauling major ass with my late aunt's heavy as shit sewing supplies. For my part, I vent the new timeline to my friends and then get to work cleaning my bedroom so I can move the stuff I have sprawled over the living room into my bedroom. Because my bedroom being messy is what's getting in my way the most.

When she's done hauling boxes, she goes to start cleaning the bathroom, and because she's in too much of a hurry on this new self-imposed and sprung upon me timeline, she hurts herself cleaning the toilet. Spasms her wrist, locks up her back. I help her downstairs but she's obviously done for the day, probably done for the week even. I get back to light cleaning with breaks, pacing myself to the new timeline I have to deal with. And I get a call from my grandma.

G: "Hey anon can you come down here." A: "I'll be down in a minute." I pull on pants and a shirt and head down.

And here we get to the key events all that context was building toward.

G: "What happened with your mom." A: "She hurt herself cleaning." G: "I know that, I mean why was she cleaning your apartment. You're an adult who's lived here for three years, and she's the only one working, and now she can't move. Why's the apartment you live in such a state that she needs to clean it for you."

Now, I know my grandma. A mule would be jealous of her stubborn demeanor. She's on an oxygen machine 24 hours a day and she still smokes two packs a week. You can't change her mind once she's made it up.

So I'm doing calculations in my head while she's laying into me, and I conclude she's made her mind up: She thinks I'm 100% in the wrong and nothing that came out my mouth would convince her that my mom is just as much an adult as I am who is responsible for her own decisions that got her to overworking when cleaning and hurting herself in the process, and also several inter-related key factors in why so much cleaning needs to be done on an 'oh fuck, immediately' timescale.

Doing the math makes me a bit angry, and I don't like the type of person I get to acting like when I'm angry, especially because anything I say will just make her more upset, so I say, "Grandma, I'm not going to have this conversation with you."

And I walk away. I leave while she yells at me to come back and let myself be yelled at. I'm angry, so I mindfully do not to slam her door on my way out and go back up stairs

After some scrumbling and a bit more light cleaning with breaks to pace myself, best I can, to this newly imposed and unreasonable timetable, my room is 90% clean and ready for me to put my stuff in it. And now that I'm not as angry anymore, I started to feel guilty that I didn't even try to explain anything to her. I just decided she'd made up her mind and made up mine to walk away without even trying. So, I typed this up to ask:

AITA for refusing to engage her in that conversation and just walking away?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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