#my notes/activity hahah

[osarina]

ᡣ𐭩 I'D MEET THE SEA UNDER THE SUNLIGHT

FEATURING: dazai osamu

SUMMARY: dazai knows. he knows who you are. he knows what you do. and not only does he know, but in typical dazai fashion, he decides to make it fully your problem. now you're stuck between a rock and a hard place trying to figure out what to do with him—the answer should be obvious, you just can't accept it. but time is ticking and you're treading a thin rope, if you make the smallest mistake...

AUTHOR'S NOTES: part four my children. my eye procedure went well! i've been resting all day, i prob won't be active very much until monday/tuesday, so i'lll queue a few reblogs of this ... i say that, but i also don't know if ill be able to stop myself from responding to comments HAHAH i just love talking to u guys about it so much i cant help it. as always, comments and reblogs appreciated!

GENERAL WARNINGS: fem!reader, port mafia executive!reader, civilian!dazai, dazai's struggles w suicide & sh, reader partakes in mafia business, dazai isn't dazai without a bit of obsessiveness and possessiveness (the possessiveness doesn't come til later but the obsessiveness starts from day 0).

CHAPTER SPECIFIC WARNINGS: i didnt get the chance to proofread this one bc of the procedure so don't crucify me if the grammar is awful </3 i have a doctor's pass </3

SEE: WASTELAND, BABY! SERIES MASTERLIST

It takes Dazai Osamu approximately two days, seven hours and fifty-three minutes to get his hands on proof of your affiliation with the Port Mafia. He supposes it was due to luck—the timing of when he got confirmation of his suspicions—but Dazai thinks it’s also due to his ability to think quickly if he does say so himself. 

He stares at the file that Katai emailed him, a lump in his throat that he can’t seem to push away, unsure if he wants to open it and be forced with physical evidence of who you are and what you do. He doesn’t even know why he’s so hesitant, he already knows. He already knows so he shouldn’t be hesitant… but if he already knows, then why does he need to see the proof? What is this going to do for him? What is he going to do with this information? Nothing, the answer is nothing, so then why-

Katai: Can you quit holding that date from four years ago over my head now?

Dazai: no ^.^

Katai: Of course not. Whatever. Dazai, I don’t know what you’re doing but you need to stop digging into this—it’s dangerous. And I don’t want to be involved.

Dazai shuts his phone off immediately. 

He hovers the cursor over the video file on his laptop, chewing the inside of his cheek—the supposed footage from whatever happened behind Tokyo’s City Hall last night. With his heart tight in his chest and the image of your smile burned behind his eyelids, he clicks on the file.

Two days after the event, you and Chuuya are sitting in Mori’s office getting the talk down of a lifetime. Mori has been going on for thirty minutes already and you’re sick of his voice. You don’t know how it’s your fault that the Shimazaki-kai decided to try to take you out while you were in Tokyo but evidently it is.

“I don’t see how this is an issue, boss,” Chuuya finally says, voice strained. “The Sun and Steel are already on top of the situation, Noriko was livid when she realized that they tried to assassinate one of us while we were in Tokyo under the Sun and Steel’s protection.”

“You don’t see how this is an issue,” Mori repeats slowly, voice nothing short of mocking. Usually, he at least tries to mask his annoyance—you and Chuuya share a concerned look with one another. “You don’t see how it’s an issue that we’ve caused this conflict to escalate to the point of the Shimazaki-kai being willing to go to war with the Sun and Steel if it means the mere chance of getting rid of one of us?”

“Okay,” Chuuya mutters. “Well, when you say it like that…”

“And by ‘we’ I mean ‘you’, little hime,” Mori says coolly, leveling his calculating gaze onto you. You don’t flinch beneath it, meeting it head on as you raise your chin. “This all stems from your reckless decision to attack the Inagawa-kai.”

“She didn’t have a choice.” Chuuya jumps to your defense, frowning. “They attacked her at the ports. That was a declaration of war in itself.”

You almost wince at the ridiculing look Mori directs toward Chuuya, voice amused as he speaks. “Is that what she told you?”

Chuuya gives you a questioning look but you don’t give Mori anymore time to stir the pot. You don’t need Chuuya knowing that your decision was driven by Dazai of all people—he’s already angry enough about the situation with the civilian. 

“And here I thought you were going to… what was it you said? ‘Clean up my mess?’” you say snidely, drawing Mori’s attention back to you. “Perhaps the real reason the Yakuza syndicates are so willing to challenge our authority is not because of my decision but rather because of the incapability perceived in our boss.” 

Chuuya’s eyes shoot open and Mori raises his brows, entirely unperturbed by your comment. 

“To think all it would take for you to start biting back…” Mori trails off, unbearably amused and clearly referring to Dazai, making you stiffen. “How fascinating. You’ve kept up this ruse longer than I expected. I think this is the first time you’ve managed to surprise me, little hime.” 

Your expression twists as you look away, ignoring the lost look Chuuya gives you, clearly irritated because he doesn’t know what’s going on. Your phone buzzes in your pocket and you take the welcome distraction eagerly, hoping to find an excuse to get out of this wretched meeting.

Klaus: your civilian boy is at your tower

You: What?

Klaus: *one image attached*

You stare down at your phone in shock, desperately trying to ignore the curious looks Mori and Chuuya are sending your way.

What the fuck?

Dazai tilts his head to the side, giving the three boys standing in front of him a simpering smile. One of them—the emo one with black hair and white tips—bares his teeth at Dazai like a feral dog, the one in the middle—Dazai recognizes him as Klaus, the boy with you that day at the ports—gives him an irritable look, while the one standing in the back—a nervous looking boy with choppy silver hair and a black collar—lets out a pathetic noise in the back of his throat.

“She’s gonna be so fucking mad at you,” Klaus tells him, voice harsh. His Japanese is broken and accented but understandable for the most part. “She’s gonna fucking-”

He shifts into a foreign language mid-sentence—German, maybe—so Dazai doesn’t know what he’s saying but he’s sure it’s nothing good. He keeps up the overly confident facade, even if he does start to doubt himself internally.

Shit, he thinks to himself, smile fraying at the edges, what is he doing?

Dazai definitely did not think this through and it’s way too late for him to back down now. After watching the video and seeing you with the gravity manipulator, seeing the brief battle in the alley behind the Tokyo city hall, Dazai pretty much blackmailed Katai into using the CCTV cameras between both cities to follow you back to Yokohama to see what building you live in. In retrospect, maybe that’s a little creepy, but he just watched you and the gravity manipulator kill a whole crew of people so he thinks stalking you a bit isn’t too bad in comparison.

“Who do you think you are?” the black-haired one says, voice tight and pitched. His jaw is clenched tight and he takes half a step forward but pauses when he sees the sharp look of warning that Klaus gives him.

He thinks maybe he is stupid. Ango used to rattle him around and yell at him for doing stupid things back before Odasaku died but he thinks this might take the cake for the stupidest thing Dazai has ever done. Standing outside a building owned by the Mafia, antagonizing three mafiosos, waiting here to demand a conversation with someone who is likely their boss. Ango might’ve been right when he said that Dazai has no functioning brain cells.

“None of your business,” Dazai replies with a sweet smile, almost giggling at the way the boy bears his teeth again, even more livid than before.

“You-”

“Stop.”

All three boys go rigid at the sound of your voice and even Dazai stiffens at the cold tone. He forces himself to turn his head to the side, eyes falling upon you as you make your way toward the four of them. The suit you’re wearing today is different—usually he’s seen you wear black on black, but today you’re wearing a burgundy button-up under your suit jacket. You look beautiful—always do, Dazai thinks wistfully—but Dazai finds himself swallowing thickly instead, not used to the blank look you cast over him before you turn your attention over to the three boys.

Ouch, Dazai thinks, not really knowing what he expected but it still hurts to be dismissed like that.

“Klaus, go wipe the cameras around headquarters—wherever he might have passed through,” you say. “Akutagawa, Atsushi, if anyone finds out about this…”

The two boys that Dazai doesn’t recognize share a look with one another, odd expressions spreading across their faces before they nod. All three scamper off without another word, the silver-haired boy giving Dazai a short, worried look that puts Dazai on edge before leaving. You don’t look at him. Rather, you stride right past him toward the building.

Dazai swallows thickly before following after you. You don’t say a word as you lead him to the tall, black building and Dazai wants to say something but his words get caught in his throat. He doesn’t know what to say. Dazai always has something to say but he doesn’t right now and that scares him because he needs to figure out what he’s going to say to you when the two of you finally get up to your apartment.

“Hey, I know you’re a mafia executive because I had my hacker friend get me CCTV tapes from the Tokyo City Hall and I saw you and that short ginger with the tacky hat murder a bunch of guys. Plus, I had him stalk you so I could figure out where you live.”

Yeah, right.

Dazai shivers at the rush of cool air that hits him as he enters the building with you, watches the way the doorman gives him a curious look before inclining his head to you. You give the older man a pointed look before nodding your head to one of the corners of the room and the elevator—Dazai doesn’t know what you’re getting at but he obviously does from the way says:

“Of course, hime.”

You don’t say anything still, leading him toward the elevator and holding it open so he can step past and stand inside. You follow after him, clicking the button to the top floor of the building before scanning a keycard.

How awkward.

Dazai almost wants to crawl out of his own skin, toss himself right out of the glass elevator looking over the city. You don’t even look at him—you keep your gaze trained forward, lips curled down, not even sparing Dazai the briefest glance as the elevator starts to move up. 

Maybe this was a mistake, Dazai starts to think, twiddling with his fingers as he keeps sparing short glances in your direction. He still doesn’t even know what he wants to come from this—shouldn’t the proof of your affiliation with the Mafia have been enough to send him running? He should’ve taken it as reason to stop reaching out to you, gone back to life before you but-

But life before you was dark. 

His throat spasms as he swallows. Life before you was dark. Life before you was him dragging himself out of bed every day trying to convince himself that he couldn’t let himself die until he fulfilled Odasaku’s final request. Life before you was him fighting depressive episode after depressive episode with alcohol and sex, preferring pain to the emptiness he seemed to constantly be plagued with because at least that meant he could feel something. 

He doesn’t want to go back to that—you’re the first person who's actually seen him since Odasaku died. The first person to make him feel as if he’s worth something. He doesn’t give a shit about about what you do, he doesn’t want to go back to life without you.

He glances over at you again, catching the eerily blank expression on your face as you stare ahead. Three words spill from his lips before he can stop them.

“Are you mad?” His voice wavers over the question; he feels pathetic. Feels like a kid tugging at his mother’s shirt after he did something wrong.

You finally look at him though, turn your head slowly toward him as if you don’t even want to believe he actually asked that. Dazai doesn’t know if it’s progress or not because the expression on your face is nothing short of livid.

“Okay,” he says quietly, averting his gaze back to the glass of the elevator.

God, how many floors is this building? The ride to the top floor is taking an agonizingly long amount of time. He doesn’t know if it’s because the elevator itself is slow or if it’s because the building is just that tall or if it just seems longer because of Dazai’s own turmoil—either way, it leaves Dazai miserable.

He really needs to figure out what he’s going to say to you. He should have figured it out before coming here but Dazai just got too antsy with the information Katai gave him on hand and he found himself making his way over here before he could double guess himself.

He doesn’t think you’ll appreciate him using Katai to get the evidence of your position in the Mafia—plus, it could put him in danger and Dazai doesn’t want that. He thinks maybe he’ll pin the blame on his professor—you don’t seem to like him anyway, so you might take it at face value. If you don’t, he’ll have to figure something else out to protect Katai but Dazai has always been a quick thinker so he has faith that he’ll think of something. 

 If he’s lucky, you’ll lead the conversation and he’ll be able to reflect off of you after seeing where your head's at. That would be the best case scenario.

After what feels like an eternity, the elevator finally bings, signaling that it has finally reached the top floor of the building. You step out before him, hardly even looking at him as you stride into your apartment. Dazai follows after, a bit more hesitantly.

His breath catches as his gaze twists around the massive space—floor to ceiling windows line the walls looking over the city, black couches set up in front of the TV and expensive decor littering the room, there’s a kitchen off to the right and a staircase leading up to a second level. 

What types of apartments have staircases? Dazai thinks, distressed, finally looking back at you. 

You’ve crossed the room—almost like you’ve wanted to put as much distance as possible between you and him, which is a thought that kind of hurts because he’s been yearning for your presence since you left his apartment the morning you were supposed to leave for abroad. Your expression is entirely unreadable and Dazai doesn’t really know how to feel about that because he can’t figure out how to approach this now. 

“You know, originally I was interested in you because I thought you were a lot smarter than you made yourself out to be,” you say, voice dry. Dazai nearly cheers, realizing that he did, in fact, get the best case scenario—he listens intently, mind racing as he tries to figure out what route he should take with you. “I was clearly wrong.”

Dazai pouts. “My bella thinks I’m stupid,” he sighs dramatically but his lashes flutter as he averts his gaze when you don’t find any amusement in his words, readjusting his plan. His theatrical lilt falls flat when he adds, “Maybe I am.”

“I don’t think there’s a maybe,” you correct, unamused. “What do you know and what do you want?” 

Dazai is almost taken aback by your tone—cold and flat, very transactional. Maybe he should have taken the lead because he doesn’t know what you mean and he doesn’t like your tone. He watches as you fish through your pocket to find a cigarette and lighter, sticking it between your lips to light it. You look up at him, raising your eyebrows.

“What?” he asks, voice a bit weak.

“What do you know and what do you want? I think they’re pretty simple questions,” you say sardonically. “I have a general idea of what you know already—if you’re here, you have more than whatever that cunt Ui has on me—and I promise you that no amount of money the Ivory Eagle will offer you can compare to what I’ll give you. Plus, I’ll have to kill you if you go to it with them so I think that’s pretty convincing in itself. I want to know exactly what you know so I can figure out how much they’d pay you for the information. I figure you want money, that’s why you’re here.”

“I don’t…” Dazai trails off, a bit lost. He’s still not sure why he came here but he knows it’s not for money and honestly, he thinks he’s a little hurt that you assumed that, can feel the sting in his chest and the lump in his throat.

The smile you give him is cool, you tilt your head to the side and look at him. “Come on, Dazai, you don’t have to keep up with the act. You got close to me to get evidence for Ui, that’s obvious; probably realized it would be more worthwhile trying to get money from me to keep you quiet because they’ve barely got enough money to keep their shitty journalism house running. Honestly, I should probably just-”

“No,” Dazai forces out, interrupting you, lips parted and throat swollen—this is not going well. “That’s not-that’s not true. I didn’t get close to you to get evidence, I didn’t even know until the other day.”

“Do you think I’m stupid, Dazai?” you ask, expression tight. “Because I’m not. As soon as you slipped up and said his name at the event, I realized. You think we don’t know everything that goes on in this city? About that shitty journalist group trying to expose us?” 

“I didn’t slip up,” Dazai says, voice more shrill than he intended it to be. His mind falls flat at every corner as he tries to figure out how to salvage this. “I didn’t slip up because I didn’t know. I didn’t know. It wasn’t-this wasn’t some grand scheme, I like you-” (he didn’t mean to say that) “I mean-it’s just-I don’t-”

Dazai feels flustered. He feels flustered and he’s stumbling over words in a way that he hasn’t in years, unable to get out a single coherent sentence because his mind is all over the place. Shit, he thought he was going to have to defend himself from having Katai stalk you so he could figure this out and find you; he didn’t think he’d have to defend himself because you thought everything from day one was some grand scheme to expose you as a mafioso.

You clearly don’t believe him from the way you roll your eyes and it makes Dazai’s distress spike exponentially. 

“Then pray tell, Dazai, why are you here? You’re here for something, obviously, otherwise you wouldn’t have been stupid enough to show up here of all places to dangle over my head that you know who I am.”

The words slip from his lips before he can stop them.

“I wanted you to stop ignoring me,” he says, arms instinctively curling around his body as he stares at you, feeling more than a bit vulnerable at the blank look you give him in response to his words.

“You… want to make me stop ignoring you by… blackmailing me?”

“... Yes?”

The sigh you let out is long. Instead of responding, you take a drag of your cigarette, tilting your head back against the wall you’re leaning on to look up at the ceiling. Dazai stares at you, chewing the inside of his cheek as he waits for your response.

“What do you have on me?” you finally ask, taking a few steps forward to put the cigarette out on an ashtray before raising your eyebrows and tilting your head to the side. “Well? I know you must have more than the location of this building.”

Dazai hesitates before he says, “Footage from behind the Tokyo City Hall.”

Your expression doesn’t betray you as you press, “Footage of what?”

“You and the ginger with the ugly hat,” Dazai answers, trying not to smile at the way you clearly have to hide your amusement at his snide comment. 

“What are we doing in the footage?” you ask. “What makes it condemning?”

“… He splattered six guys against the wall.” 

You sigh, pressing your fingers to the bridge of your nose. “Jesus fucking Christ, Dazai. You saw that and still came here? What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Dazai gives you a weak smile “You’ll have to be a bit more specific, there are a lot of things wrong with me,” he tells you, echoing the words from your second meeting with him, hoping they make you lighten up.

They do.

He watches as you let out another breath, tense shoulders relaxing, suddenly looking a lot more tired as you look away from him.

“I missed you,” he adds quietly, fingers running along the hem of his sweater. “It’s cruel and unusual punishment to kiss a guy like you did and then ghost him.”

“It was to keep you out of this life, Dazai,” you say tiredly. “I mean-shit, Dazai. I don’t know what you want me to do, I don’t even trust you right now, you could have a fucking wire on you for all I know and-”

“I could strip for you,” Dazai offers, lips curling up in a flirtatious smile as he flutters his lashes at you. “I’ll give you a show.”

You’re not amused.

“This isn’t a fucking joke, Dazai. This is your life.”

“Well, my life has been one giant joke up until I met you so forgive me if I don’t care,” Dazai says, voice unintentionally rising in response to your words because who are you to decide on his behalf to cut him off because his life is in danger. That’s a decision for him to make. “You can’t just make those decisions for me.”

Dazai thinks he prefers the anger that crosses over your face to the tiredness and emptiness. His breath catches when he sees the way your jaw tightens and the way your eyes get fired up.

“It doesn’t just affect you, Dazai,” you hiss. “If you get pulled into this and something happens to you, that’s on me.”

Dazai’s heart jumps at the implications of your words, nails digging into his palms.

“And how does that affect you?” Dazai presses, the desperation that hangs off of his words so glaring that Dazai almost wants to curl in on himself. He wants to hear you say it, wants you to alleviate all of the thoughts threatening to consume him since you left his apartment that morning—wants to hear you say that you care, that he does mean something to you.

Your expression becomes closed off again as you realize what he wants you to say and Dazai swallows thickly, gaze searching your face for answers.

“You know how it affects me,” you finally respond as you look away. “You know, Dazai.”

It has nothing to do with what I want, you said at the event when he asked why you didn’t tell him why you didn’t want to be with him. The conflict on your face when you said things were too complicated to explain. The anger when you realized Professor Ui had purposely put him in danger trying to get evidence to condemn the Sun and Steel.

“I want you to say it,” he says hoarsely.

You don’t reply for a moment, watching him with an expression that’s impossible for him to decipher. Your brows are furrowed and your lips are pressed together tight, but the look in your eyes—there’s so much emotion in them that Dazai thinks he could get lost in them, it nearly leaves him breathless.

“You are actually the bane of my existence, Dazai Osamu,” you finally say, shoulders slumping as you look away again. Not exactly what he wanted to hear but he thinks that’s as good of an admission that he’s going to get right now.

“And the object of all of your desires?” Dazai prods with a teasing smile.

Your gaze cuts back toward him. “Did you just quote Bridgerton at me?” you ask, voice riddled with disbelief.

Embarrassed, Dazai flushes and then he hits you back with: “You watched Bridgerton?”

Instead of responding, seemingly equally embarrassed by the callout as Dazai is, you scowl at him and shake your head but your voice is lighter now when you speak—if only barely. “Honestly, Dazai, what did you think you were going to get out of this by coming here? I could have killed you. I should kill you. Coming to the headquarters of the Port Mafia to blackmail one of its executives with evidence threatening to expose them-”

“I didn’t threaten to expose you,” Dazai protests, prancing a bit more into your apartment. Now that he’s not as stressed, he can actually admire your apartment—apartment, is this even an apartment? He runs his fingers along the pristine black marble of the bar separating your kitchen from the living room, ignoring the way your eyes follow him. “I just…”

“You threatened to expose me,” you interrupt dryly. “You implied it.”

“I did not,” Dazai complains. “It’s not my fault you took it that way.”

You roll your eyes. “What were you thinking, Dazai?” you ask again.

Dazai gives you a sweet smile. “I’m thinking that you’re going to take me out on a date.”

You don’t know why you’re even entertaining him.

Three days later, you’re outside Dazai’s apartment complex waiting for him to get back from his classes. You’d have gone to the campus itself but you don’t feel like having to beg Albatross or Iceman to get into the campus cameras to wipe the footage of you being there, especially knowing that it’ll get right back to Chuuya who is still under the belief that you’re no longer talking to Dazai.

You scowl as you look down at your phone, checking the time again. He should’ve been back ten minutes ago—you told him you were here waiting. Your reservation is in thirty minutes and he still has to change, you glance over your shoulder as a group of college students make their way toward the complex. You hardly stop yourself from rolling your eyes, you’d figured that the complex would be popular with the kids attending YNU—that’s why you ended up buying it—but you really don’t want to interact with any of them. 

You can feel them looking at you too—fuck, you should have just stayed in your car. From the corner of your eye, you can see them exchange curious looks with one another. One of the boys nudges another, clearly beckoning him to go try to talk to you and you will strength from the gods-

You hear your name fall from familiar lips, quiet and unsure, and the unpleasant expression that you know must be on your face melts away. You let your head fall to the side over your shoulder, gaze focusing on Dazai—he’s dressed casually in a brown sweater and cream pants, school books tucked to his chest and backpack hanging off of his shoulders. He looks surprised at the sight of you so you raise your eyebrows.

“You’re late, I texted you,” you say simply as he approaches you, glancing at the car and then to you curiously.

“My phone died,” he replies sheepishly, a bit of light returning to his eyes as he comes closer to you. Warmth starts to spread through your chest when you see how the corners of his lips twitch up, fingers absently thrumming against his books. “Where are we going?” 

“You’re getting changed,” you reply, nodding to the suit hanging in the passenger seat of he car, “and then-”

“Yo, Dazai-kun!”

Your eye twitches at the interruption, gaze twisting to the side to fall on one of the boys from that group you’d been dreading walking over before Dazai arrived. You notice him stiffen, an uncomfortable expression crossing his face when he hears his name being called. So, you sigh, motion for him to go into the car and grab the suit as you turn your attention to the group of approaching college students.

“We’re busy,” you say with a tight smile, tone short and perfunctory but trying to be polite. 

Your eyes sweep over the one who spoke up—he’s dressed nice, slacks and a button up, tailored neatly to his body, but there’s something so distasteful about him that you can’t help the way your lip curls up in disgust. Maybe it’s because of the way Dazai looks so uncomfortable.

The man looks entirely unperturbed by your blatant dismissal, giving you a charming smile. “I’m Yoshimura Hiro—me and Daz-”

Irritated, you glance one last time at Dazai, seeing that he got the suit out of the car and shut the door. You lock the car and without another word, press your hand against Dazai’s lower back to urge him forward, walking away from the small group without another word.

Dazai can hardly muffle the snort that escapes his lips as soon as the two of you make it into the building. His eyes have regained that brightness that they’d lost when his classmates approached you, a smile curving at his lips.

“That was so rude,” he says with a grin.

“We have a reservation to make,” you tell him dryly. “I said we were busy.”

“Still, you didn’t even wait for him to finish introducing himself.”

“Would you have preferred I had?” you ask, glancing at him as he unlocks his apartment, watching as his smile falters as he shakes his head. “Why don’t you get along with them?”

Dazai shrugs but he seems a bit more awkward now as you step into his apartment. He tosses his books onto the coffee table and shrugs his backpack off onto the couch. You lean against the wall as you wait for him to respond, noting that his apartment is much cleaner than the last time you were here.

“They don’t like me,” he corrects absently, fiddling with a mug on his coffee table before bringing it over to the kitchen. “Most people don’t.”

There’s a silent question lingering at the end of the sentence—you know it, even if you couldn’t tell from the way the words hang, you can see it in the way his eyes draw over to you. Maybe he wants reassurance of some kind that you do like him, that you’re not just doing this because of the blackmail, but the words die on the tip of your tongue.

Instead, you say, “Go get changed. We’re running late already.”

Dazai looks disappointed by your words—you can see it in the way his shoulders slump and his lashes lower, the corner of his lips tightening—but he lets out a dramatic sigh, muttering something under his breath before going into his bathroom to change.

Luckily, it only takes him a few minutes to get changed into the suit. He comes out as he’s still buttoning up the waistcoat—jacket slung over his shoulder. Your eyes drop down to his slim waist, eyes lingering at how neatly the vest clings to it.

Kido really did a good job, you think, having to drag your eyes back up to his face as he finally shrugs the jacket on and looks back up at you.

“You look nice,” you compliment, watching as his cheeks flush just a shade darker. “I didn’t have time to change after my meeting. If I’d known you were going to be ten minutes late, I would’ve.” 

Dazai promptly scowls at you. “Well, maybe you shouldn’t have waited until the last second to tell me. What if I already had plans?” he complains, but then adds, “… I think you look beautiful.”

“I wear this outfit everyday,” you dismiss, ignoring the way your chest flutters.

“I know,” he admits quietly. “You look beautiful everyday.”

Oh.

“We should go!” Dazai says suddenly, a bit too loudly to be casual. “We’re running late, aren’t we?” 

You clear your throat. “Yeah,” you say. “Come on, let’s go.” 

The walk back to your car is quiet—the students you’d left there are gone, thank god. You can feel Dazai looking at you every few seconds as if he wants to say something but can’t bring himself to say it. You have half a mind to just tell him to spit it out but you still find yourself a bit flustered so you just let it be until you’re in the car.

“Where are we going anyway?” Dazai finally asks as you pull out of the complex, twisting in the passenger seat to look at you. His eyes look almost golden beneath the rays of the sun, soft and excited, you can’t help the way your gaze lingers before you force yourself to focus on the road.

“You said you wanted to go to that restaurant by your campus, didn’t you?” you ask, tilting your head to the side to raise your eyebrows before looking forward again. “Taking you there.”

“The rooftop restaurant looking over the park?” Dazai splutters, eyes widening. “You remembered that? It’s so expensive, I-”

You don’t even acknowledge the last thing he was saying. Instead, you give him a squinty look before asking, “Why wouldn’t I remember?”

Dazai’s lips part as he stares at you like he’s trying to say something but can’t bring himself to. You don’t like the way he’s looking at you, it makes your heart twist in on itself. It’s too intense, too close to lo-

You don’t even let yourself finish that sentence, focusing back on the road as you change the subject. “They import crabs from the Beagle Channel in southern Argentina—best quality in the world, much better than that canned shit you eat every day.”

“What do you have against canned crab?” Dazai complains, leaning his head against the window. “You hate me. How did you even get a reservation at this place? They’re booked out like ten months in advance, we talked three days ago.”

You give Dazai a heavy side eye that he understands instantly from how he rolls his eyes, muttering something under his breath that you don’t quite catch.

“What was that?” you ask, giving him a pointed smile.

“Nothing,” he scowls.

You smile to yourself, focusing on driving again. The restaurant isn’t far from his complex so you get there pretty quickly. Dazai is quiet for most of the rest of the ride aside from the occasional comment about his classes. He bitches about his engineering class and all of the irritating freshman boys that he’s taking it with because it’s a 101 class, tells you vaguely about how he’s on a roll for one of his projects for his poetry workshop, explains the plot of the book he’s reading for his creative writing class, and he notably does not mention anything about his journalism class—you don’t know if it’s because he’s too awkward to bring it up or what, but you’re grateful for it because the last thing you want to do is think about him working with Ui Koutarou to expose you as a mafia executive. You still don’t even entirely believe this isn’t some whole big scheme they concocted together.

You let the car roll to a stop in front of the tower the restaurant is in, leaving it running as you put it in park and nod for Dazai to get out. You get out yourself, grabbing the keys and tossing them over to the valet with a quick thanks before leading Dazai into the building.

He looks almost wonderstruck as he steps into the tower, brown eyes wide and glittering as he looks at all of the expensive decor in the lobby of the tower. You have to physically guide him forward, arm slipping around his waist to get him moving in the direction of the elevator, but as soon as you come in contact with him, he goes rigid. Your brows furrow, about to pull your arm back but before you can, he presses his palm against the back of your hand, holding your arm in place for a quick second. You can’t help the smile that twitches to your lips when his arm drops back to his side and you catch the pretty flush staining his cheeks as he pointedly looks away.

You lead him into the elevator, catching the pout that pushes at his lips when your arm leaves his waist and you’re going to tease him for it but then you catch the oddly intense look in his eyes as he gazes down at you.

“What is it?” you ask.

“Nothing,” he replies, throat bobbing as if considering what to say. “It’s just… no one has ever done this for me before.”

“It’s just dinner, Dazai,” you tell him, voice quiet as you look away, missing the way his expression drops at your words.

“Yeah,” he agrees, though he sounds strained now so you give him a concerned look that he tries to play off with a smile that’s too frayed at the edges for comfort. You’re about to call him out on it but you don’t get the chance because the elevator doors slide open to the restaurant on the top floor before you can.

A familiar face stands on the other side of the elevator, delighted at the sight of you. “Hime,” the owner of the restaurant greets as you step out of the elevator with Dazai, reaching out to clasp one of your hands with both of his. “I almost didn’t believe it when they said you called to see if we could get you a table tonight. It’s been so long.”

“Ah, Yoshida-san, you’ll have to forgive me,” you say with an easy smile. “You know how busy work can get.”

“Of course, of course,” Yoshida replies, glancing at Dazai and inclining his head to him. “This must be your date. Come, I’ll seat the two of you.”

Dazai looks a bit out of his depth, the smile on his face strained and an unsure look in his eyes so you reach out to hook your arm into his, leading him through the restaurant as you make idle talk with Yoshida. You’re pleased when he brings you to a table near the window with a view over the whole park and the distant bay. 

Yoshida bows his head down to the two of you and lets you get settled, you take a seat but then give Dazai an odd look when he just stands there with a contemplative expression. You’re about to ask him what he’s doing when he suddenly moves to grab the chair opposite you.

He drags the chair from his side of the table all the way to yours. The legs scrape the floor so loudly that it draws the attention of all of the other patrons of the restaurant. You stare at him, lips parted in disbelief, but Dazai only gives you a sweet smile in return. He’s entirely unperturbed, plopping the chair down right next to yours and taking a seat in it. He rests his elbow on the table, propping his chin on his hand and watching you with an indescribable look in his eyes.

“You’re the worst,” you tell him but there’s no heat to your words as the corners of your lips tug up.

“You love me anyway,” Dazai coos, gaze flickering down to your lips briefly before settling back on your eyes.

When a soft, pleased smile spreads across Dazai’s face as he leans in to nudge his shoulder against yours, you have to actively remind yourself that you’re only doing this because of the blackmail. 

Dazai is already lounging on your couch when you get up to your apartment. You don’t seem to notice him—you’re clearly unhappy about something, lips twisted down and brows furrowed as you talk to someone on your phone. It’s not until Dazai peeks his head up above the back of the couch to look at you do you finally catch sight of the movement, eyes flickering to the side to focus on him.

“Thanks, Tolstoy, I’ll let you know if I need him. I appreciate it,” you say before letting the phone drop from your ear and ending the call. 

For a horrifying second, your expression doesn’t change and all of those insecurities that he can’t push away—that you really are only doing this because of the video, that he’s forcing himself on you instead of giving you an excuse to actually be with him that goes above the fears that are haunting you. But then, you sigh and your shoulders slump. You toss your jacket onto the other couch before sitting with him on the one he’s sitting on, knees knocking against his.

“Hi,” Dazai says with a small smile, itching to shift closer to you but hardly refraining. “You’re late today.”

“You’re early,” you reply dryly but there’s a fond curl to the corners of your lips that makes Dazai feel nice and warm. “You know, I think you’ve been at my apartment more than yours the past week.”

Dazai’s smile becomes simpering. “Why would I stay in my small, dirty apartment when I could stay in your nice one?” he asks, watching as you roll yours. “Anyway, you love it when I’m here. Your apartment would be so lonely and boring without me.”

“It would be something alright,” you agree half-heartedly, leaning your head against the back of the couch and letting your eyes slide shut.

Dazai’s smile falters as soon as your gaze leaves him, an uncomfortable and unwelcome feeling spreading through his chest. Is he being too much? He has been spending a lot of time at your apartment but it’s because whenever he’s alone, his own thoughts threaten to consume him. They whisper too loudly about how you’d never be doing this without the blackmail, about how he’s so desperate to not be alone that he’d stoop to forcing you to hang out with him. They’re quieter when he’s here, even when you’re not, so he’s been spending as much time as possible in your apartment, doing his schoolwork and watching TV while he waits for you to come back.

“Long day?” Dazai finally asks to draw himself out of his own thoughts, watching as you look back over at him.

“Mhm,” you agree, leaning your head against the back of the couch. “Lots of meetings. All with people I don’t like.”

You’ve become a bit more open over the past week—you still don’t tell him anything of importance, of course, but you’re at least not avoiding just about every topic that edges somewhat close to your ‘business’. He still feels like he doesn’t know you as well as he should and he hasn’t tried to push that anymore since the night you showed up at his apartment. He wants to try to push again but he’s just worried that he’s going to take it too far and he’ll mess it up.

He supposes he should at least try to feel it out though.

“Can I ask something?” he asks after a moment, almost wincing when you immediately cast him a suspicious look.

“The last time you asked me that, you were trying to figure out if I was in the Mafia,” you say doubtfully and Dazai’s throat goes dry as you lean back against the arm of the couch and extend your legs outward onto his lap. Hesitantly, he drops his hand onto your ankle, grip becoming more firm when you don’t instantly pull away.

“Well, we’ve already figured that out,” Dazai says with a sweet smile but then lets the smile drop as he adds more seriously, “I just want to get to know you better.”

You sigh, watching him carefully for a moment before nodding. “Go ahead,” you say. “Ask.”

“What’s your ability?”

Instantly, you sigh and look away. Dazai’s heart drops and his lips part to say something else but he doesn’t know what.

“I can’t, Dazai,” you finally tell him and Dazai tries not to be disappointed but he can’t help the way his lashes lower. “It’s not-you shouldn’t even know I have an ability. Only a handful of people know. It’s literally the most confidential secret in the-I can’t.”

“But I already know you have one,” Dazai presses, his tone coming across as far too close to a whine considering the look you give him. “What’s the harm in telling me what it is?” 

“Dazai,” you say, voice becoming more edged. “You don’t understand what people would do to get intel on my ability—I’m not going to-”

“I just want to know you,” Dazai interrupts, words drawn out and throat tight. “I just-I want to know you.”

You stare at him for a moment and Dazai’s grip on your ankle tightens, expression dropping. Just as he’s about to drawback and give up, you sigh and look away from him.

“I can mess around with people’s minds,” you finally tell him, voice quiet. Dazai’s eyes widen, head snapping toward you as he waits for you to continue. “I can… induce different types of mental and physical states in the brain and mind.”

“Like… Emma Frost?” Dazai asks, squinting. You give him an odd look so he amends, “Like mind control?” 

“No,” you answer. “I can’t… control minds. I can like… induce short term changes in emotions and sensations. I’m not directly manipulating them but putting them into a state and letting them work with it. They can either snap themselves out of it or make it stronger.”

“... I see,” Dazai says slowly. “So, you can make someone happy but if something makes them sad after, it’ll snap them out of it?”

“Pretty much,” you hum but there’s a weird look on your face that tells Dazai that maybe you’re not saying everything. “Some emotions are easier than others. Happiness is more… fragile, harder to sustain in a target. Fear is much more… a lot like a parasite—once you put it in someone’s head, almost everyone will start to spiral. It’s much harder to break out of.”

“The mindkiller,” Dazai notes, quoting one of his favorite books, a bit of morbid curiosity spiking, wanting to know how he would fare.

You give him an amused look. “Now, you’re quoting Dune? Quite the broad taste in media.”

“You’ve read Dune, too?” Dazai gapes. “You must be my soulmate.”

“You’re ridiculous,” you say, rolling your eyes.

“Ridiculously cute,” Dazai counters immediately, smile twitching at his lips when he sees the fond expression on your face.

Then, naturally, he makes a mistake. 

“Can you use it on me?” Dazai asks, leaning forward a bit. When you give him a sharp, alarmed look, he quickly fumbles out, “Not like anything big. I just want to see what it’s like. Just something sma-”

“No.”

“But-”

“No,” you say loudly, making Dazai draw back, hand falling from your ankle to rest on the couch next to him. You pull your legs off of his lap and sit up straight, turning your body away from him. “Just no, Dazai. Don’t ask me that again.”

“I didn’t mean-” Dazai starts to apologize but he’s flustered, not having expected a response like that from you. He fucked up. Again. Just as he was making progress. Again. “I don’t-”

“I can’t turn off my ability,” you tell him quietly after a moment. “It’s… always going to some extent. Making people around me more at ease so they feel more comfortable talking to me. I don’t like using it to its full extent if I don’t have to, not on people I consider friends at least. I never know if people… I don’t know who wants to be around me for me and who’s just influenced by my ability.”

Oh.

Dazai shifts closer to you, there’s an unreadable expression on your face as you stare ahead. He hesitates for a second before reaching out and grabbing your hand, forcing you to look at him.

“I want you for you,” Dazai stresses. When you start to shake your head and look away, he repeats, “I do. I-”

“You wouldn’t know, Dazai,” you say, voice tight. “That’s the issue, you wouldn’t know.”

“I would know,” Dazai tells you, squeezing your hand. “I would know, I want you. I do.”

You don’t respond to him this time, staring ahead and Dazai doesn’t know what to do because you look sad. You look lost in your own thoughts, consumed by whatever is running through your head. It’s familiar—the same way he probably looks whenever he lets the parasites in his brain start eating away, sending him down a dangerous spiral.

He wants to draw you out of it. 

More than that, he wants to kiss you again. Desperately. 

He’s yearned for it since that night in his apartment, spent long nights alone and aching for your company when he thought you were abroad. For days, he could feel his lips tingling with the ghost of yours still brushing against them, could feel the weight of your body on his hips, grounding him when he thought he would finally be consumed by the emptiness that perpetually plagues him. He thinks maybe he can draw you out in the same way you always do for him. 

He wants to kiss you, and he’s about to lean in to do just that, breath catching in the back of his throat as his body becomes prickly with nerves.

You turn your head away before he can, rising to your feet and making your way to your bedroom, leaving him damningly alone in the living room of your apartment. 

He lets out a shaky breath, staring down at his lap, a cold and unsure feeling taking root in his chest.

Dazai has become a constant presence in your life. 

At first, it caused you nothing but stress—you constantly feared that him showing up to your apartment would lead to unwelcome eyes learning of his existence but he’s been very careful entering and leaving the building, and Klaus has been on top of the cameras. You think it’s been around a week and a half, maybe two weeks since Dazai first confronted you about everything and in that week and a half (maybe two weeks), you don’t think a single day has gone by without you coming home to find Dazai curled up on your couch or hunched over your kitchen table.

Today is no different.

Your head is pounding when you make it up to your apartment, you’d spent two hours arguing with Chuuya over how to approach the issue with Shimazaki-kai. The Sun and Steel are struggling against them in Tokyo and Mishima Michiko had come to Yokohama personally to request assistance from the Port Mafia in routing them from Shibuya-ku. You don’t want to send Chuuya there—it’s only a matter of time before the Guild shows up in Yokohama to try to take the weretiger and you’ll need Chuuya here when they do. You can’t risk sending him off now.

But Chuuya wants to go there now—says that it’s a bad look that the Port Mafia started this conflict and is now leaving the Sun and Steel to suffer the consequences. And he’s right, but the Guild is more pressing than the Shimazaki-kai.

 It’s not often that the two of you disagree on tactical decisions, but when you do, the disagreements are stressful and explosive. Both of you are bullheaded and both of you are convinced that your decision is the correct one—and Lippmann wasn’t here to force you guys to settle down so it just became more and more heated until you finally stormed off.

You pause when you enter your apartment and hear a choppy tune being played on the piano in your living room—something you vaguely recognize as the beginning of Chopin’s Raindrop Prelude even with the many mistakes being made. Your stress and frustration slips away as you catch sight of Dazai sitting at the piano bench, so focused on the sheet music in front of him that he doesn’t even notice your arrival.

A small smile tugs at your lips as you quietly make your way over to him, watching as he pauses in the song and sighs, clearly frustrated by his mistakes. You take the opportunity to slide your hand across his shoulder blades; he jumps beneath your touch, eyes widening as he twists his neck to look up at you, cheeks flushing. 

“I didn’t know you played,” you say absently. “If you want, I can have the spare room on this floor made into a music room for you.”

You don’t know why you offer it, but you enjoy the look in his eyes as his gaze focuses on you: big and imploring, full of emotion. It’s a welcome change from the livid expression Chuuya had been casting your way for the past few hours.

“I don’t really,” Dazai says awkwardly. “I was just trying it out.”

“Well, do you like it?” you ask him, taking a seat on the bench next to him, fingers lingering on his lower back.

“I think so,” he tells you after a few moments, lashes fluttering as he looks down at the keys and then back up at you. “I think my mother used to play… I don’t really remember her, but I can vaguely remember a song she used to play.”

There’s an odd look in his eyes as he averts his gaze and you squeeze his side gently before saying, “Maybe the more you play, the more it’ll come back to you.

“Yeah, maybe,” he agrees half-heartedly, looking at you again, more carefully this time. “Are you okay?” 

You pause, not having expected him to catch onto your bad mood so quickly when you were doing your best to hide it, but you finally sigh and shake your head.

“Yeah,” you tell him, motioning for him to get up so the two of you can move over to the much more comfortable couch. “Stressful day. I thought you had class on Wednesdays.”

“It was online today,” Dazai says, propping his arms up on the back of the couch as he sits up. “I thought you said you wouldn’t be back until super late tonight.”

You scoff. “Yeah, until I got into a fight with Chuuya,” you mutter, making your way over to him to sit on the couch with him, looking at the puzzle he has spread out on your coffee table. “Where’d you get this?” 

Dazai gives you a sweet smile. “You left your computer open yesterday, I ordered some things.”

Dazai inches closer to you, there’s an indecipherable expression on his face, lips parted and eyes a bit wide. You can feel his knee nudging yours and you know what he wants. He’s been trying to make subtle moves on you for days but you just… You don’t know. You’re scared.

You’re scared.

You don’t think you’ve felt this way since you were a kid, trapped in that room in the military base on Tokoyami Island desperately trying to understand what your ability was so you wouldn’t be thrown back out into a warzone. Except now, it’s not just your fate on the line—every decision you make, Dazai’s life hinges on it and you’ve been making stupid ones for weeks. Even now, letting him stay at your apartment… Even if you do own all of the cameras, even if Klaus is on top of it, even if Dazai is being careful, it’s only a matter of time before a mistake is made.

You don’t know what you’re still holding out for. Maybe a chance to make him understand what exactly is at stake, break things off with you on his own… Maybe you’re waiting for something else. Your conversation with Tolstoy echoes through your head, his offer of sending Ilya Repin to you for you to utilize as you please.

Ilya Repin. A Crucession in Oakwood. 

Someone who can wipe Dazai’s memories of you so you can send him back off to live a normal life, make him forget he ever met you. It’s not something you want to do, fiddling with people’s minds… you know better than anyone that it’s not something to take lightly. But would it be worth it to ensure he lives? That he doesn’t get drawn any further into your shitshow life? The thought makes your chest ache painfully but if it means he would be safe.

You let out a shaky breath, looking away, and you can feel the disappointment emanating off of him, you can feel his fingers brushing your arm, but before you can say anything to him, you hear your elevator bing.

Someone arriving at your floor.

Your eyes widen as you rise to your feet, you cast Dazai a panicked look. He follows after you, unsure of what he should do. Klaus is across the city—he’s the only one that can come up to your apartment without permission besides-

Besides Chuuya.

Oh shit.

“Go to the kitchen,” you say, voice tight and stressed, you push Dazai forward to get him moving. You cannot let Chuuya know that Dazai is here. “Get to the-”

“Yo.” You hear Chuuya say, voice low and distracted as he steps into your apartment. He’s looking down at a bottle of wine, so you wave your hand at Dazai frantically, shooing him into the kitchen. He shoots you a panicked look before rushing into the kitchen. “I didn’t mean to let shit get so heated before.”

“You’re good,” you tell him, careful to keep the strain from your voice as Chuuya finally looks up from the bottle and makes his way over to you. “Takes two, I shouldn’t have been so quick to snap at you.”

“Nah.” Chuuya shakes his head, plopping down on the couch next to you. “You’ve been going through shit. The Boss constantly on your ass, having to drop that kid you liked-” shit “-I should’ve let it go instead of pressing. Brought you this.”

Oh, you’re in a bad spot. Your mind is a whirlwind of thoughts as you race to figure out what to do. You have to get Chuuya out of your apartment, but the man knows you so well that it’ll be impossible to do that without raising suspicion. If this were any other day and Dazai Osamu wasn’t hiding in your kitchen, you would be trying to worm more than just a bottle of wine out of Chuuya—probably dinner and a night out to go along with it—but he’ll want to crack open the bottle before going out and your wine glasses are in your kitchen.

Shit.

“An ‘82 Rothschild,” you drawl. “You’re really trying to butter me up.”

Chuuya gives you a smile that makes you feel guilty. “‘Cause I feel like shit,” he mutters and you hardly refrain from wincing because you know he wouldn’t if he knew the truth.

You think you might be the worst person alive. 

“How about we put it in the wine fridge and head out for the night?” you hum, nudging his shoulder. “Didn’t you want to try that new bar by the ports in Naka? The one Lippmann went to with his coworkers? We’ll save the wine for us to celebrate after we wipe out the Shimazaki-kai.” 

A good move. You almost pat yourself on the back for it—Chuuya’s been talking about this bar for weeks, but hasn’t gotten a break from work to actually go check it out. He was livid the other day when he found out Albatross and Iceman went without him. Plus, you implied that you’d give in a little on the argument you were having with him earlier; maybe you won’t send him to Tokyo to help the Sun and Steel but you could probably send Klaus or Akutagawa to ease Chuuya’s stress over the situation.

Please, please, please, please-

“Nah,” Chuuya says, shaking his head. “Maybe another night. I’ll go grab some glasses, find a movie?” 

Oh, fuck me.

“I’ll get them,” you say instead, too quickly from the way Chuuya is instantly casting a suspicious look in your direction so you pivot with: “I picked the last movie. It’s your turn.”

“You hate when I pick movies,” Chuuya says with a frown, studying you carefully before letting his eyes trail over to the kitchen. He’s thinking too hard, you realize, stressed, you need to make him stop before he figures out you don’t want him to go in there because once he realizes that, there’s no shot he won’t be rushing over there. “What’s really going on?” 

“Nothing,” you say easily. “I’m in the mood to trash one of your low budget horror movies.”

Chuuya instantly gives you an offended look and you think, for a moment, that you’ve succeeded. “Well, I’m not in the mood to hear you bitch halfway through the movie, so pick a damn movie.”

Chuuya rises to his feet, putting the bottle of wine down on the coffee table and you want to rip your hair out—why is he so fucking stubborn? You reach out to grab his wrist to stop him, teeth grinding together, and when Chuuya looks back at you, you know that he knows.

“What’s in the kitchen?” Chuuya asks, voice low.

“None of your business,” you reply, jaw tight. “Sit down and let me get the glasses.”’

“I don’t fuckin’ believe you,” Chuuya snaps and rips his wrist from your grasp and storms over to the kitchen. 

You race behind him, only able to watch as everything starts to crumble. You try to grab his wrist again but he slips out from your hold. For a scary second, you genuinely debate using your ability on him just to convince him to stop, to make him leave, but you disregard the thought as soon as it passes through your head, horrified with yourself.

“Chuuya, stop,” you say desperately, a last ditch attempt to make him stop, hoping that maybe when he hears how serious you are about this that he might reconsider, but it’s Chuuya, so of course he doesn’t.

You know it’s over when he freezes in the doorframe of your kitchen, staring into the room like he’s seen a ghost. Dreadfully, you come to stand at his side, looking over his shoulder to see what exactly he’s looking at, wanting nothing more than to crawl into a hole and die.

Dazai sits on the floor, half hiding behind your counter but unable to fully because of his height; his legs are too long to fit behind the counter and his head is peeking above the marble, brown eyes wide as he looks between the two of you. He focuses his attention on Chuuya, who stares at him mutely in disbelief.

Dazai finally says, “Your hat is tackier in person.”

Oh my god.

Chuuya doesn’t even react to the snide comment which you think is testimony to how angry he really is. He drags his gaze from Dazai over to you and you can see the rage swimming in his eyes. You don’t know how to approach this—Chuuya is always unpredictable when he’s angry—so you think maybe you should wait for him to say something first, but that’s also risky because once he’s set off, he’s set off. 

“You lied to me,” Chuuya says, voice low. “I was sitting here feeling guilty and-”

“I didn’t lie to you,” you interrupt, shaking your head, but that only pisses Chuuya off more from the way he shoots a pointed look at Dazai. “I didn’t. I did cut him off, Chuuya. I-”

“He’s sitting on your kitchen floor,” Chuuya’s spits, voice raising as he works himself up. “You let me sit here feeling guilty about this when-”

Chuuya suddenly cuts himself off, eyes widening as he stares at you, and a pit forms in your stomach, realizing he must have just come to another conclusion. Distress begins to pile in your chest because you can’t figure out what to do, frustration because this wasn’t supposed to happen. You want to look over to Dazai but you know it will only serve to piss Chuuya off even more.

“‘Is that what she told you?’” Chuuya whispers Mori’s words from a few weeks ago. “Don’t even tell me that the war with the Inagawa-kai began because of him. You told me they attacked you.”

You grimace, turning your face away and Chuuya lets out a high and reedy laugh, eyes wild with disbelief. You can feel Dazai’s curious eyes on you and you just want to curl in on yourself.

“We went to war with two Yakuza syndicates because of him-”

“We went to war because of what happened with your-” you begin to say, angry at the hypocrisy.

“And she died anyway,” Chuuya shouts, a familiar, eerie red glow beginning to emanate from his hands as he starts to lose control of his ability in his anger. “You couldn’t save her then, what makes you think you can save him now?”

You draw back as if you’d been slapped—you think you might’ve been better off getting slapped than hearing Chuuya say that. You stare at him blankly, watching as he looks over at Dazai, but you can’t bring yourself to follow his gaze.

“It would be more merciful if I just killed him now,” Chuuya says coolly. “Spare him from-”

You only move when he takes a step forward, grabbing his wrist and pressing your forearm hard against his upper chest to shove him into your fridge. Chuuya doesn’t expect you to get physical so his eyes widen as his back hits the fridge, gaze darting back to focus on you. The familiar feeling of the Tainted Sorrow sweeps over your body, coating you in that destructive red glow. 

For a moment, neither of you move.

“We both know you won’t use your ability on me,” you finally say, keeping your voice low. “I’ll fuck up your brain so badly that you won’t be able to look at yourself in the mirror for weeks if you take another step toward him.”

Chuuya doesn’t budge for a second, the tension in the room rising with each passing second. After a few minutes, he finally turns off his ability, taking in a deep breath as he shakes his head and looks away. You step back and Chuuya sighs as he leans against the fridge, forcing himself to look back at you.

“I did cut him off after we talked… ish,” you tell him and Chuuya gives you a flat look. “I did. I ran into him at the ports. One of the kyodai of the Inagawa-kai showed up, saw me with him. Klaus killed him. We had to act before they found out we drew first blood.”

“Oh my god,” Chuuya complains, pressing his hands to his eyes. “You-I had to use Corruption. The entire northern ward-”

“I know, Chuuya,” you say tightly. “I didn’t mean for any of it to happen. I-”

You let out a breath, glancing once at Dazai who’s watching you with an indecipherable expression and then ask Chuuya, “Can we go into the other room?”

Dazai’s head snaps toward you, an offended expression on his face, but you ignore him. “You’re talking about me-” he starts to protest but Chuuya gives him a sharp look that makes Dazai blanch even more, looking to you for support but you look away, missing the way his expression crumbles.

As soon as the two of you are in the other room, Chuuya gives you a hard look, waiting for you to continue.

“I cut him off after what happened at the port and I ran into him again at the event a few weeks ago,” you say quietly. “His professor for one of his classes is a journalist working for the Ivory Eagle, he has three kids—including Dazai—doing his dirty work trying to find proof of the Mori Corporation being a front for the Port Mafia.”

Chuuya stares at you. “What?” he asks blankly.

“Yeah, I know,” you grimace. “Dazai found the proof. He has a video of us from behind the Tokyo City Hall.”

“You’re letting yourself be blackmailed by a college student?” Chuuya demands loudly. You give him a sharp look, but it’s too late, Dazai is already looking into the room with an indecipherable expression on his face, lashes lowering as his gaze falls to the ground. “You’re a fucking mafia executive, are you fucking with me right now?” 

Your eye twitches in frustration, casting one last look in Dazai’s direction, watching the way his brows furrow as he thinks up a storm in that head of his—nothing good, you’re sure, but you can’t do anything about it right now.

“I’m not going to kill him, Chuuya,” you hiss under your breath. “Would you have killed her if she found out?”

Chuuya lets out a heavy breath and looks away, not answering your question but that’s an answer in itself.

“Look,” you continue, glancing at where Dazai had been standing only to realize that he’d walked away. You sigh and lower your voice. “I’m working on something. I just… I need time to figure out how to go about it. I don’t want him in this life either, Chuuya. I’m not that selfish.”

Yes, you are, a distant part of you whispers. Otherwise, you would have handled this as soon as he came to your apartment that first day.

Chuuya shakes his head. “You need to be careful. You have him in our headquarters, in your apartment. Do you know how thin of a line you’re treading? The slightest slip up-”

“I know, Chuuya,” you say, strained. “I know.”

“Figure it out quickly,” Chuuya murmurs. “I’ll do what I can in the meantime to keep the heat off of you. Just… quit fucking around.”

Chuuya gives you a steady look and you know that he knows that you’re using this as an excuse to indulge in Dazai when you shouldn’t be. You can hardly hold his gaze, lashes fluttering as you look down. He reaches out to squeeze your forearm and you turn your head away, trying to figure out what the fuck you’re going to say to Dazai.

“Yeah, I will.”

Dazai pretends like everything is fine.

He’s still sitting cross-legged on your bed when you finally come looking for him, hands in his lap and back straight. You lean against the doorframe, an uncharacteristically soft expression on your face as you look at him—Dazai hates it, because he knows that he’s not going to like whatever you’re about to bring up to him so he decides he needs to evade the conversation in whatever manner possible.

“Did that pipsqueak leave?” Dazai huffs, only finding a bit of consolation in the way your lips curl up into a smile at his insult.

“He did,” you agree, pushing off the doorframe to make your way over to him. Dazai swallows thickly when you take a seat in front of him on the bed. You lean back on your hands, head falling to the side as you observe him. “I didn’t think he was coming over today. We’d just gotten into an argument so things were already tense. I’m sorry that it blew up on you like that.”

Dazai doesn’t want to talk about this, so instead, he smiles and says, “It’s fine. Do you want to watch a movie?” 

Your brow furrows at the way he dismisses your comment—god, he doesn’t want to talk about this. He knows where it’s going to lead, he knows you’re only doing this because of the blackmail and he knew from day one that it wasn’t going to work forever but he’d hoped maybe he’d be able to woo you before then, make you want him for him, want him enough to decide he’s worth the risk. He should’ve known better—he really should have—but he’s not ready to let go just yet.

So, before you can bring it back up again, Dazai forces the smile on his face to come across a little more genuine as he tilts his head and hums, “I found a good horror movie. I’m stealing your pillow to hide behind while we watch.”

Please.

He knows you can see through the sweet smile and honeyed words but he begs you to just pretend you don’t one last time. After what feels like an eternity, you finally sigh, gaze dropping to your lap for a second before you look back up at him and say, “You’re not taking my pillow.”

Dazai doesn’t have to force a smile now, lighting up as he waves your pillow in the air and sings, “Too late!” before darting off the bed and into the other room.

“Dazai!” you call after him loudly and he tosses a smile over his shoulder before disappearing into the other room. He can hear you chasing after him and though his chest does feel a bit lighter, he can’t push away the cold, empty feeling that’s slowly starting to consume him.

[creamiecoups]

dessert - jeongcheol x reader

part one.

↠  summary :  although being the personal assistant for two CEO’s who own a huge company seems hectic and stressful, it had its own perks if both men were head over heels for you that they didn’t bother fighting on who would get to keep you in the end. Anyways two is always better than one right?

that is until you meet one of their very good looking buisness partners Jaehyun, sparking an idea in you to flirt with him to piss off the boys...but you’re too late to realise that it was, indeed, a bad idea.

↠  pairing : seungcheol x jeonghan x reader

↠ warnings :  swearing, smut, dom!seungcheol soft dom?! jeonghan, use of pet names, heavy degradation, rough fingering, slight choking, use of toys, cum play, seungcheol is very mean, reader is a brat, mentions of alcohol, dacryphilia

↠ word count : 5.3K words

↠ author’s note : and finally after more than a year i posted yay!! I’m so sorry for the long wait as i know many ppl have been sending me messages asking me when I’ll be back, but I’m here now and will finally start being more active here i promise hahah

i thought I’d post this one shot first with part one, and I’ll post the day I have finalised for part two.

until my next update feel free to send me reqs and until then, enjoy ;)

part one part two

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It really did start of as a joke.

Well, it always did…but this time, part of the reason was because you were bored out of your mind and needed something to do that would at least keep you entertained.

And so, because of that 'stunt', you were currently situated in the bathroom, Jeonghan's hands wrapped around your neck firmly.

"Baby, what were you trying to achieve back there?" He asked, tilting his head to the side a little.

"I don't get why you're mad, all I did was go on my phone," you replied, rolling your eyes before you heard him click his tongue.

"Don't roll your eyes at me...I wouldn't have cared if you just went on your phone but sighing every two fucking minutes and tapping your feet on the ground so fucking hard was not necessary," he spat, gritting his teeth as you realised he was really mad.

"I was bored okay? I don't even get why you guys bought me here it's so boring...can I just call a taxi and head home first, please?" You begged, making him inhale sharply before glaring at you.

"No, you're staying here until we're done," he shot back, making you sigh.

"Anyways....your lucky that was just one of my aquaintances...but now, Seungcheol and I have serious matters to discuss with a possible business partner, you should know how important this would be for us so I advise you, stay put and enough with the bratty attitude."

"Fine, can you at least let me get my earphones from the car?" You asked, making him sigh angrily.

"No, look, if it helps...we'll finally be having dinner so you can stuff your mouth so you won't be bored anymore."

"I'd rather have my mouth stuffed with something else though," you whispered, leaning up to peck the side of his lips with a smirk.

"Well maybe if you behave well for us, you'll get what you want after we're done," Jeonghan replied.

"Okay, I'll be good until then," you replied cheekily, a smirk spread across your face.

"Good, now come, Seungcheol is probably waiting for us."

Both of you walked out of the bathroom, making your way back to the bustling restaurant that the company had rented out for the night to hopefully affiliate with other organizations.

"Hey," Seungcheol greeted you with a big smile, as you sat between him and Jeonghan.

You gave him a smile, before bowing slightly to the man opposite you.

"So this must be your assistant? I've heard a lot about you," the man said, making you smile.

He looked around your age, and you had to admit he was pretty good looking.

"Well I hope good things," you said, a chuckle leaving your lips.

"Of course, I've heard your very good at your job, care to come work at my company instead? My assistants still learning and he's a bit...well, slow in his work and plus, it'll be nice to have a pretty face walking around," he said, giving me a smile.

"Well that wouldn't be too bad, I'll think about it," you joked, as you instantly felt Seungcheol's hand grab your thigh under the table.

"Anyways, let's order before we get into business, what do you say Jaehyun?" Jeonghan asked, making you smile.

he had a nice name.

"Yes of course, I'll call over the waiter," Jaehyun said, before winking my way.

I smirked, suddenly having an idea in my head.

After everyone ordered their food, they began to converse casually about their achievements in their respective companies, which to you just seemed like boastful remarks.

You yawned softly as you felt Seungcheol draw slow circles into your thigh, something he usually did unconsciously while talking or resting.

"Would you really move to his company?" Jeonghan whispered in your ear, making you smile.

"Why not, it'll be nice to have a change of scenery," you whispered back, as you heard Jeonghan chuckle.

"If only he knew half of the time your bent over our study table getting stuffed with our cocks because you were too needy to even function when we asked you to get a job done," he chuckled lowly, making you clench around nothing.

"Fuck off."

"Language princess, you would be in a great deal amount of trouble if Seungcheol heard you," Jeonghan whispered, before pulling away.

You cleared your throat, before turning your attention to whatever Seungcheol and Jaehyun were talking about.

The food finally arrived after a while, making you sigh happily as you looked down to the pasta you ordered.

You almost moaned with how good it tasted, as you were glad you could eat since most of the reason you were bored was because you were hungry.

"You like it?" Seungcheol asked, making you nod.

"Hey we ordered the same thing!" Jaehyun pointed out, making you chuckle.

"We did, it's so good right?" You asked him, giving him a sweet smile.

"It is, I would say I might order it the second time but the portion is so huge," Jaehyun said, laughing as you joined him.

"Let's talk business now, shall we?" Seungcheol said, a smile on his face as you felt his fingers grip your thigh tightly.

"Ahh right yes, that is why we are here."

You sighed internally as you realised that was your queue to back out since you wouldn't really understand as it wasn't your place to join their conversation.

And either way, it was boring.

"Hannie," your whispered in Jeonghan's ear, while he was busy listening.

"Later Y/N, we're busy," he mumbled, his eyes darting between Seungcheol and Jaehyun as they discussed an important matter.

"But Hannie this is important," you whined, feeling his hand make it's way to your thigh.

"Y/N stop," he warned, slapping your thigh softly, making you squirm in your seat a little.

Once it was Jeonghan's turn to speak, you turned to Seungcheol.

"Cheolie, can I go to the bathroom?"

"Later," he whispered, as he didn't even bother glancing at you.

You sighed angrily, pushing their hands off your thigh before speaking out loudly.

"Jeonghan would you be kind enough to move as I need to go to the bathroom?" You asked, tilting your head to the side as Jeonghan stopped talking to look at you.

He hesitantly nodded, before standing up to let you get through.

You gave him a big smile before walking towards the bathroom area, your lips turning into a smirk as you knew you probably ticked them off.

After you were done you opened the bathroom door, about to walk out before you saw someone push you back in quickly before they were pinning you to the door.

You looked up, your lips curving into a smile when you saw Seungcheol's angry eyes.

"What are you trying to do?"

"I don't know what you mean?" You replied back, looking at him cluelessly as he gritted his jaw.

"Jeonghan spoke to you about staying put and being obediant before right? So what are you doing now?" Seungcheol drawled, as you shifted your legs, his deep voice not doing any good for your already wet panties.

"I got bored...and you both were completely ignoring me," you sulked, pouting as you looked up at him with your big eyes.

"We both told you that you could go to the bathroom later right? So why did you still decide to ask again?"

"It's just the bathroom! I was so bored I was literally applying my mascara again just to avoid your boring conversations."

"Pull up your dress," he suddenly spat, making you look up at him in confusion.

"What?"

"I know a big reason why your so bored is because your needy little cunt in probably dripping right now...you think I didn't notice the way you keep shifting?" He asked, chuckling as he watched you slowly pull your dress up.

"Tell me baby, what has you so needy right now?" Seungcheol whispered in your ear, one of his hands moving down your body before he was cupping your heat.

You instantly let out a whine as you let go off your dress to hold onto Seungcheol's broad shoulders.

"I-I.....just wanted," you stuttered, bucking your hips up into his touch.

"You wanted what? Attention?" He asked, as he slowly rubbed you over your panties, the thin material already sticking to your skin.

You nodded your head, making Seungcheol chuckle darkly.

"You're always so needy for us aren't you? Constantly need someone showing you attention...but you really couldn't go a few hours without being cock hungry hm? Didn't Jeonghan fuck you a few times this morning while I was out?" He asked, making you quietly moan as he drew circles on your covered clit.

You nodded once again, making Seungcheol click his fingers.

"Use your words baby."

"Y-Yes...yes he did," you quickly said, as you felt him move your panties to the side before his fingers were pushing flush against your entrance.

"Fuck your so wet," he groaned, bringing his coated fingers up to his lips.

"So tell me, your still needy even after Jeonghan fucked you only a few hours ago?"

You nodded your head feverishly.

"Cheolie....touch me please," you whined, making Seungcheol chuckle.

He plunged two of his fingers into your seeping entrance without warning, making you throw your head back as you moaned loudly.

"Quiet down, we don't need all our employees knowing how much of a dirty little slut you are for me now do we?"

He started at a fast pace, nothing you weren't used to as he was normally rough with you im comparison to Jeonghan, not that you cared anyways.

"Cum nice and sweet on my fingers okay?" He whispered, adding a third finger before he was curling them when he knew he hit your sweet spot.

Your toes curled as you leaned into his shoulder to muffle your sounds.

"Your such a fucking needy little girl baby, you've been fucked all morning and now your still so needy when we haven't even gone home yet," Seungcheol whispered, lightly pecking your shoulder blade as his fingers pumped in and out of you.

"Ch-Cheol....need...more," you whined, making Seungcheol laugh.

"Oh no princess....your not getting dick that easy. You'll have to wait until we get home, so until then...hopefully this shuts you up," he whispered, as you felt your release edge closer as you clenched down on his fingers.

"That's it baby, cum now," you heard Seungcheol say, as you felt your release wash over you, making you moan quietly, as you shivered.

He pulled his fingers away from you before bringing them up to his lips to suck them clean. You watched as you suddenly felt empty, making you whine softly.

"I have to go now, make yourself look a bit more presentable and come back soon okay?" Seungcheol said, pulling your dress down before leaning in to peck your cheek.

"You were so good for me, I'll consider rewarding you when we get home," he whispered, winking at you before he was moving you away from the door so he could leave.

"And baby? Enough with the flirting, don't think we haven't picked up on that....don't let me find you warming up to Jaehyun again," he warned, making you smile at him.

"I won't, I promise."

"Oh your back, I thought you went missing," Jaehyun joked, as you sat in between Seungcheol and Jeonghan again.

You laughed a little, before reaching forward to grab a glass of water.

The night progressed as the men around you continued to converse about their companies and what both of them could bring to the table if they were to affiliate.

Soon it was time for drinks, making your ears perk up as Seungcheol offered to get the drinks for everyone.

"What do you want to drink?" Seungcheol asked you, as his hand on your thigh slowly rubbed circles into your skin.

"Champagne is fine," you replied, making him nod before he was walking towards the bar after taking the other two men's order as well.

"So Y/N....have you thought about my offer from before?" Jaehyun asked you, making you crease your eyebrows at him.

"Offer....what offer?" You ask, tilting your head to the side a little.

"To come work with me....these two surely can do things without you I mean...they have each other! But my assistant is downright a rookie and pretty useless so...if you're down too, I'd love to have you," Jaehyun said with a smirk playing on his lips.

"I'll think about it, maybe....what do you think?" You directed the question to Jeonghan, your faux innocent eyes shining at him as you felt his hand grip your thigh tightly.

"Sorry Jaehyun..." Jeonghan trailed off, before his eyes were on the man across him.

"But I can't give away our most trusted employee, she does her job well and so no, we will not be giving her away to you."

Jaehyun chuckled as his eyes fell to mine.

"Well isn't that a pity... I was looking forward to appointing you as my personal assistant," he said, before Seungcheol came back with our drinks.

"So...what have we been talking about?" Seungcheol asked, as he handed me my glass of champagne before sitting down.

"Jaehyun wants me as his assistant, thought it would be fun but Jeonghan thinks I do my job so well," you say, smirking as Seungcheol's eyes darkened.

"Is that so? Well if you'd like, I can send through a list of capable people who could fill in the role if you're hiring?" Seungcheol asked, as you felt Jeonghan's hand on your thigh move up higher.

"Ah no, I really was joking...but I will comment, you both are very lucky," Jaehyun said with a smile, as you playfully winked at him.

Now that, ticked the both of them off completely.

Seungcheol stifled next to you as he eagerly changed the topic, as he soon conversed with Jaehyun about business, while Jeonghan leaned in to your ear.

"You've really done it now princess, spread your legs," he whispered, his warm breath hitting your cheek as you took another sip of your drink.

"And if I don't?" You dared to ask, as Jeonghan simply smiled at you before leaning in closer.

"Spread your legs," he repeated, making you gulp.

You hesitantly spread your legs as you felt Jeonghan's fingers instantly press against your sticky clothed core.

"Did cheol make you cum earlier in the bathroom? Your so wet," he whispered as you bit back a whimper.

"Y-Yeah, he f-fingered me," you whispered, as he scoffed.

"And your still acting bratty? Hm..." He trailed off, before you saw a few other men come to join you three on the table.

"Seungcheol?" Jeonghan called out to him, as he turned to look at you both.

"Yeah?" He asked, his eyes trailing down to you.

"Try to keep her still while you talk," he muttered, as your heartbeat accelerated.

"W-What are you g-going to do?" You stuttered, as Jeonghan smiled at you.

"You want to wink at a man in front of us? Then let's show him how much of a whore you are for us in front of him," he chuckled, as you felt Seungcheol's hand grab your thigh tightly before you felt Jeonghan's fingers push your panties to the side, his fingers making direct contact to your heat.

Your body jolted instantly, as you tried your hardest not to throw your head back from the delicious contact, and if you thought that was painful, when two of Jeonghan's fingers plunged inside of you, you knew it was only going to get worse for you.

"Stay still, eyes open...more investors have joined now so we'll be conversing more, stay quiet and take what I give you, or you won't like what happens next," Jeonghan spat near your ear, making you nod feverishly.

Your eyes flew to Jaehyun, who was too busy talking to the middle aged man next to him to notice you, as you suddenly took in the fact that everyone around you were too busy to even pay attention to you both.

Jeonghan's fingers stilled in you, making you instantly slump in your seat as you looked towards him.

He was smiling like a little bitch, so into a conversation with an unfamiliar guy next to him that no one would even think he was doing something so dirty and sinful under the huge table.

Your eyes darted towards Seungcheol who was looking through an important document, his eyebrows furrowed as his hand was gripping your thigh tightly so your legs were spread enough for Jeonghan to access.

"Cheol," you called out, your voice coming out almost in a whine making him look at you.

"What?" He spat irritatedly, making you frown.

"When can we leave?" you whisper, as you heard his jaw clench tightly.

"Didn't I warn you earlier not to be a brat?" He shot, his eyes throwing daggers at yours.

"Hannie won't please me properly, I can't take it anymore," you whine back boldly, as you felt his fingernails dig into the skin of you thigh in anger.

"Jeonghan."

"Yeah?" Jeonghan responded, his eyes falling on Seungcheol.

"Move your fingers, and give her what I gave you earlier, she doesn't seem to know how to follow orders," he spat, making Jeonghan nod.

"What?" You ask cluelessly, before you felt the sudden emptiness as Jeonghan withdrew his fingers from your sopping entrance.

maybe you should just behave

"Han wait...I-Im sorry I'll stay still from now on," you quickly mumbled, making Jeonghan chuckle lowly.

"Ask cheol, you should know he doesn't tolerate your shit but here we are," Jeonghan said, before you felt something hard and long poke your entrance.

a fucking vibrator.

Your eyes widen before turning to look at Seungcheol who was listening to a conversation intently, that was until you started tapping his arm.

"Cheol N-No.... I-I'll be good I promise, please," you whispered.

"Have it on medium setting, we'll see how she takes it," He said, his words obviously being directed to Jeonghan as he completely ignored you.

Your heartbeat accelerated as you felt Jeonghan slowly ease the dildo into your entrance, the cum slick from earlier providing an easy slip as he pushed it right into you, making you grab the table tightly.

Knuckles turning white and thighs clamped together, you sat there for for what felt like hours with the quiet buzz of the vibrator making you feel as if the entire room was spinning. It was perfect to ease the ache you had, but it wasn't enough to get you to cum, especially since both the boys' hands weren't on you anymore.

Your head lolled towards Jeonghan, soft pants leaving your pretty glossed lips as your long manicured nails taps against his white dress shirt eagerly.

"Hm?" He hummed, glancing at you only for a second.

"I-It's too much...I wanna...c-c–"

"Y/N," Seungcheol suddenly called out, making you stop talking.

You turned to looked at him, lips pouty and eyes filled with need as it took Seungcheol his all not to grab you by the hair and fuck you on the table in front of everyone.

Which he would eventually get around to doing tonight, but just not now.

"Can you go get me another glass of champagne, please?" He asked sweetly, making you shake your head softly.

"I-I can't...g-get up–"

Seungcheol chuckled softly, cutting you off as he leaned in to your ear, his hand on your thigh once again.

"I wasn't really asking, get up and go get me what I asked for, slut," he spat, making you squirm in your seat.

"You're a dick," you whimper out, before standing up shakily.

With all the strength and self control you could muster, you pushed past Jeongham before carefully walking towards the bar.

Walking around in heels with a fat dildo snuggled in your pussy? this was definitely not how you saw the night going but here you were.

"O-One...g-g Champagne," your words slur as the bartender looks at you in concern.

"Miss are you okay?" he asks in concern, making you nod feverishly.

"Mhm...just get...champagne," you mumble as he nods before pouring a glass on the sparkling liquid.

"Here have a glass of water...you look really flushed...are you gonna be sick?" He asked.

"No..no...but thanks for the water," you finally say a sentence without stuttering, so you pat yourself on the back mentally.

"No worries Ms, please do sit down until you finish your water though," he said, making you hesitantly nod.

You slowly sat down on the barstool, sucking air through your teeth as you felt the vibrator nuzzle into you more.

"Would you like anything else?" The bartender asked, as he gave you a glass of water.

"N-No....I'm good with...with water," your words slurred slightly as you both the glass up to your lips with shaky fingers.

"Are you here alone?" The bartender suddenly asked, as you realised he had been staring at you this entire time.

"N-No I'm...I'm here with a few business... people...I'm sorry for stuttering I just don't feel so good," you babbled on, completely unaware of the pair of eyes burning into your back in rage.

"That's completely understandable, you don't need to say sorry but I do think you should go rest," he said, before leaning over the counter to touch my forehead.

"You're burning up Miss I don't think you should be drink–"

"Get up we're going home."

You shakily turn around to see an angry Seungcheol standing in front of you, his top two buttons undone as his eyes left yours briefly to look at the confused bartender in front of you.

"Yeah she's had a bit too much to drink," he spat shortly, before grabbing you by the wrist and yanking you off the bar stool.

"Cheolie careful I'm in heels," you whine out, but he doesn't seem to hear or care as he walked out of the restaurant, his grip on your wrist never faltering.

"W-What about Jeonghannie," you hiccup, trying to keep up with Seungcheol's pace in your painfully high heels.

Suddenly you felt the vibrators speed increase, making you buckle your hips as a moan left your lips, causing Seungcheol to laugh.

He opened the passenger seat door before practically throwing you in, as you heard the door shut loudly before he was getting into the drivers seat.

"You've really done it today princess....you've found numerous ways to push our buttons and now I'm gonna make sure this type of behaviour will never be repeated from your end, ever again," he spat.

"Cheolie too much," you whine, spreading your legs shamelessly as your hands came down to pull the dildo out of you.

"Ah, ah...that’s staying in there since you decided to act like such a fucking child today I had to leave an important conversation early and now Jeonghan has to do all the work....why do you think so?" He asked, turning to look at you.

"Mm.....I-I don't know," you whimpered out, making his eyes darken.

"How many times did I tell you to stop being a brat today, hm? I even went out of my way and fucked you with my fingers to get you to shut up...so why did you continue to piss me off in front of everyone? And then when I told you to go get me a drink, I found you shamelessly eye fucking that bartender like a whore," he growled, grabbing your jaw tightly as you whimpered, clenching down on the dildo.

"I w-wasn't–" your words were ripped out of your throat when his hand landed down on your aching pussy harshly.

"Don't fucking lie to me, you think I wouldn't notice the way you were talking to him? And the way he wanted to fuck you so bad," he chuckled, as he pulled up your dress so he could eye your soaked underwear.

"Take it off, come on."

You bit down on your bottom lip as you came hard almost quietly, your head lolling to the side as soft pants left your mouth.

"Aww did my baby just cum?"

"Y-Yeah," you mumble out, your lips parted as Seungcheol removed your underwear.

"Your being so so disobedient today Y/N...why's that? I was talking to you about something and you decided to cum? Is that what I've taught you?" He spat lowly, as you watched him bunch your underwear into a ball before pushing it into his pocket.

"M' sorry....c-couldn't help it," you whimper out, tears spilling from your eyes at the overstimulation.

"S-Seung...cheol...the v-vibrator please....too m-much," you hiccup again, as Seungcheol's hand threads through your hair.

"We're alone now baby...that's not my name," he spat into your ear.

"Although I'm starting to think I should make you call me that in public, so everyone around you including you remember who you belong to."

His voice was ten times deeper than usual, which only made you ten times wetter than you already were.

"Would you like that baby?" He asked, his free hand resting on your thigh as you whined.

"Take it out p-please," you whimper out, making Seungcheol sigh.

"Answer my question first doll,” he groaned, his hand in your hair rubbing your scalp slowly.

"No that's embarrassing," you scoff, as he chuckled lowly.

"Why's that? You love disobeying us in public so maybe that will help you remember your place, what do you think?" He asked, eyes narrowing on you as you hesitantly shake your head.

"Che- Daddy no...please," you whine, as you felt his grip on your hair tighten painfully.

"Hmm...I'll think about it..now, spread your legs and be good," he spat, making you instantly comply as you wanted nothing more than having that damn vibrator out of you.

Seungcheol's fingers circled around the part of the vibrator that was sticking out of you, causing you to whine as your eyes pleaded at him to remove it from you.

"You want me to take this out baby? Too much?" He asked with a pout, tilting his head to the side as you nodded eagerly.

"P-Please."

"You know what was too much? Your attitude with us today, so take what I fucking give you or I'll have to bring out your collar....do you want that princess?" He asked, making you shake your head as he smiled.

"Good."

Your body jolted suddenly as Seungcheol grabbed the dildo, roughly thrusting it into you as you choked out a moan.

"Hold up your dress," he shot, as you whimpered from his rough ministrations, but nevertheless obeyed.

Your shaky fingers moved your long evening dress out of the way, bunching it up to your chest to give Seungcheol a better view.

"S-Slow down oh my g-god," you managed to make out, as Seungcheol scoffed.

"You don't make the demands here princess, I do, so why don't you sit here and take it...understand?" He spat, removing the dildo out of you before turning it off.

You breathed out a sigh of relief, your eyes closing only for a second before you felt three of Seungcheol's fingers push into you without warning.

"Fuck Seungcheol....fuck!" You screeched out, your body jolting as his fingers only went rougher at your words.

"What have I said about swearing?" He spat angrily, making you whimper out a weak apology he wasn't going to take.

"You use this pretty mouth of yours for all the wrong reasons baby," he added, fingers pinching your bottom lip.

"I-I'm sorry daddy," you whisper meekly, making him hum.

"Don't swear again, okay?"

"O-Okay," you whisper back, as his fingers stilled in you.

"Okay what?" He spat as you whined, clenching down on him.

"Okay daddy," you muttered quickly, before Seungcheol resumed the rough pace he had set for his fingers.

"I-I'm gonna c-cum daddy," you pant, throwing your head back as Seungcheol pulled on your hair.

"You don't cum until I say so," he drawled, making you shake your head as a smirk played on your lips.

"No."

"No?"

"I want to cum...it's t-too much," you bite back, looking up at Seungcheol's amused face.

"Oh you're still being a brat?...I'm not Jeonghan baby, you know I won't give you any chances so watch what you say to me," he shot, fingers pulling at your hair making you wince.

"It hurts stop," you whine out, wishing Jeonghan was here to help sooth you like he always did.

Every time you did something wrong, it was Seungcheol that would get furious and punish you until dawn, but Jeonghan preferred to teach you in much more gentle ways.

"Than learn to behave," he spat, stuffing two more fingers into you before curling them up.

The stretch was incredibly delicious, as your eyes rolled to the back of your head before a long moan left your parted lips.

"Daddy please...I need to cum," you desperately whined out, as Seungcheol's fingers only went rougher and unbelievably faster.

"A no is a no, you're not allowed to cum until I tell you to," he spat, all four of his fingers curling in you as you felt the heat rush to your throbbing pussy.

"Please I c-can't," you whine, the soft pants and squelching sounds coming from you only urging Seungcheol on as it took all of his self control not to drag you into his lap and fuck the living daylights out of you until you were reduced to nothing but tears.

Before you could even warn him, or yourself, you felt the knot in your stomach snap as you came hard all over his fingers.

You moaned out in bliss, the feeling taking over your senses as your body spasmed.

"Are you fucking serious?" He spat angrily, yanking his fingers out of your soaking entrance with a loud pop.

“I couldn’t help it, you kept pushing it a-and–“

“I’m not gonna take any of your bullshit, you should know that by now. I’m not Jeonghan to listen to your pathetic little excuses,” he growled, pushing his soaked fingers into your mouth roughly, causing you to gag and whimper in pain.

“Suck them clean whore,” he spat condescendingly, as you softly suckled on his fingers before he was pulling them out.

“Now sit back properly, pull your dress down and put your seatbelt on, we’re leaving,” he spat, pulling away from you completely as he started the car.

“No I want to wait for Hannie, you’re mean,” you whine out, refusing to put your seatbelt on.

“Don’t make me repeat it, Y/N….you either put it on yourself or I do it for you,” he growled angrily making you huff.

“Can we at least go back in to get dessert? I didn’t get to try the strawberry cake cheol please,” you whine, holding onto his arm as your tits pressed into him.

He sighed angrily before grabbing your jaw tightly, slightly pushing your cheeks together as his burning eyes bore into yours.

“Tonight was my last fucking nerve. You know I’m not gentle like Han, so yes princess I am mean, and brutal. So you’re in for a rough night… I hope you’re ready.”

[henrioo]

°•*⁀➷ TWO AGAINST ONE: PORTGAS D. ACE

꒰ SYNOPSIS ꒱ : "Ace makes the mistake of eating one of your pregnant husband's sweets, you, now he needs to somehow earn her forgiveness. However, it seems that in this dispute, your son has already chosen who his favorite father will be."

꒰ WARNINGS ꒱ : TRANS MALE READER, FTM READER, TRANS MASC READER, PREGNANT MALE READER, MEN PREGNANT, BIOLOGICAL PREGNANCY, GAY RELATIONSHIP, Reader is a little dramatic, pregnancy dramas, unnamed baby but is a boy, Ace and you are married, Ace is a golden retriever and you're mean to him (just a little), Ace is a perfect dad and husband

꒰ WC ꒱ : 917

꒰ NOTES ꒱ : Wow, more babies! Hahah who would have thought... Okay I wanted to say that it's the last baby story but it's not, At least next time I'll try to post another topic or you'd start to think I'm weird. The post was supposed to be yesterday and it was also supposed to be a late ask, but the ask is 7k words long and I'm having a serious problem translating it, so I'm going to post this other story today so I can have more time, enjoy!

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"Love, honey, my husband, my man, my sweet, forgive me." Your husband, Ace, whimpered beside you as you lay on the reclining sofa, covered in pillows and with a soft blanket over your huge belly. You had an irritated expression and crossed arms, purposely ignoring him and pretending to pay attention to the television.

"I'm not talking to you," you snorted irritably, and if your feet weren't swollen and your legs weren't aching, you would have kicked his ass out of the house.

"I swear, I didn't know it was your chocolate! I thought it was mine... I'm sorry, my love," he was kneeling on the sofa next to you, his hands clasped together begging for forgiveness, and his puppy eyes were so sad that anyone would have accepted his apologies.

Anyone, except you. No, no, you were a pregnant man dealing with a very active baby and hormones so out of whack that you seemed like a ticking time bomb. You definitely wouldn't forgive your husband for eating the last of your chocolate stash. Especially because it was Sunday! The store that sold your favorite, expensive, artisanal chocolate only opened on Tuesdays. You would have to go two days without your chocolate because of your husband's stupidity in not checking who the chocolate belonged to before swallowing it!

Okay, you weren't exactly craving chocolate in the past few days, and that one had been stored for a long time... But that doesn't change the fact that he shouldn't have eaten it!

"I swear I'll buy the whole store for you to forgive me! Please, don't pout at me like that," he whined again as he lovingly rubbed your arm. Ace hated hurting you, no matter how small the reason. Now that you were pregnant, he tried his best to make you live in paradise, as he was extremely worried when he found out that stress could cause serious complications in pregnancy. Although Marco and Law tried to explain that it had to be an absurd amount of stress, he practically didn't listen and accepted as an absolute truth that even the smallest amount of stress was a deadly risk for you and the baby!

"I hate you," you murmured irritably, and your frustrated pout grew. You didn't like arguing with Ace and usually didn't care so much about something like this, but those damn hormones made you go crazy. One moment you were crying, and the next you were trying to set the house on fire with Ace inside. Then, you would go back to normal as if everything were fine. You could only think that this was Ace's punishment for taking so long to propose to you.

"What can I do to make you forgive me, my king?" he sighed and sat closer to you, kissing your arm and then trying to kiss your cheek, which resulted in you moving away. "You're breaking your poor husband's heart."

"I'll ask for a divorce if you keep annoying me," you said, trying to stay strong, although you were almost giving up on arguing and just getting lost in Ace's warm embrace.

"Ouch... So cruel," he whimpered and carefully laid on your belly, then gently stroked it, giving kisses on the shirt you were wearing. "Come on, little guy, help your old man make peace with your daddy. He'll put me to sleep on the couch if he stays like this," he whimpered, trying to get help from his unborn child.

Before you could reprimand Ace again, a kick was felt by both of you... Your baby had just kicked exactly where Ace's head was, making him startle and jump from the slight blow he received, causing both of you to widen your eyes in shock.

"Our son just kicked me?" he asked, confused and incredulous about the situation.

"Humph, looks like it's two against one now," you smiled triumphantly as you caressed your belly. "Our son is smart, he knows that this daddy here is the only one whose right," you continued teasing Ace, already feeling your mood improve and the anger dissipating.

"This is unfair! The two men in my life are ganging up against me!" he crossed his arms with a pouting expression.

"Think twice before eating my sweets next time," you shrugged. "You heard the baby, today Daddy Ace sleeps on the couch," you laughed, feeling some gentle kicks from your baby, as if he really agreed with you.

"This little rascal will have to deal with me when he's born... Stealing my husband, I was here before you," he muttered childishly as he glared at your belly. "And you, mister grumpy husband, I'm going to squeeze and kiss you until you're forced to forgive me! And if you try to kick me out of our room, I'll cry at the door like a stray dog," Ace made his threat, and before you could disagree, he threw himself on top of you, covering your face with kisses as he hugged you tightly. All you could do was laugh, feeling ticklish from his kisses. You didn't usually get mad at your husband so often, but if it meant having him as a repentant little puppy trying to win your forgiveness through affection and love... Maybe you would start getting mad more often, especially if your son would help you.

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[seirei-bh]

I just played the ep 5 of New Gen on my secondary account with Amanda and wow, It surprised me how different ep 5 is depending on whether you do it on Jason route or on route with someone from Devenementiel.

*This review and opinion contains slight spoilers*

In case anyone is curious: the general tone of the ep when you play with Amanda (and I assume with the other crushes in your company) is all more fun and relaxed and you get a win on your project since the first moment, while when you play on Jason route there is a constant feeling of tension, you did it bad with the project the first time and that's why you feel desesperate until the point to trust on Jason. The results of activities ib both proyects are also a bit different (because Jason has contacts everywhere and can get even more stuff) and the final feeling when all your cowokers congratulates you for the final proyect is very diffenrent too because in one of them is joyful and in the enemy route is unconfortable for the sense of betrayal.

I want to clarify ofc that I'm not saying one is better than the other, I mean those routes options about making the project alone (+ with your enemy/crush later) or with your fav cowoker/crush have very different things during the ep and that makes replaying the ep not repetitive or boring at all, which makes me very happy and it keeps me interested in the story about other different posibilities in future eps depending of your choices. I also love that in every Devenementiel route the final date is in a different place. Mcl University Life was my favorite mcl season but one complaint I had back then is that in some eps, when replaying the ep with another route, almost all the events were too similar.

And talking about differences, Amanda is really a totally different person depending if you're on her route or not XD She's rather cold if she's only your coworker, while she's the sweetest person ever if she's your crush. Besides that vibes "friends to lovers" of her route is so adorable! asaijkashashn!! <33 Me living my perfect The Bridgertons dreams with my enemies to lover kanthony as Lily and Jason and my friends to lovers polin as Bianca and Amanda, yaaaas!

Also it was so perfect to me Amanda said she was princess Sisi at her birthday party while I answered that my Sucrette dressed as a knight at her birthday. Yaaas let my woman be your knight, my princess! 💜💜💜 hahah, I'll live in a palace with this woman in the future, mark my words.

And the final date shooping the accesories was very cute. Amanda blushing!! And my Sucrette blushing too! They're so shy, caring and cheerful together. Their smiles, the little touchs, the complicity… And the music in the special scene was so soft, with piano and violin notes… I love it <3 OOHH Beemoov I'd love sm if you gimme a scene about them dancing at a fancy party in a future chapter ToT

btw, this ep with Amanda cost me 1450 PAs. I used 3 jokers and I found uncle Archi. Jason's route was 1769 PAs (I only used one jokers here though, but the price is always a bit more expensive on Jason's route anyway)

[magicpotatoobsession]

GIVEN | Hiiragi Mix Thoughts Part 1

So I haven't been super active on this blog not because I don't love Given anymore, but any ounce of brain energy dedicated to Given means I have to feel the agony of waiting for the two movies to release. BUT ALAS the time has come because @aarinfantasy is the GOAT thank you thank you thank you~~~ Spoilers and screenshots below the cut 👇👇👇

GENERAL NOTES:

How can Mafuyu be animated even cuter than before? Like I don't even know how but how can he look even more adorable???!!

I love the intentional placement of sound and music in Hiiragi mix, moments of silence are so effective in highlighting tension, awkwardness, release, nervousness. Like even 1 minute into the movie, you hear the boys breathing as Uenoyama is tuning the guitar and Mafuyu is sitting beside him. It's those little details that show the atmosphere between characters perfectly.

I like the balance of Hiiragi/Shizu's storyline and Mafuyama's storyline, it's following the manga closely and shows the complexity and intertwining of their stories. It's a good way to juxtapose the different struggles between the two couples and what they needed from each other to overcome their miscommunication! I think the team took feedback from the Given Movie 1 2020 and OVA broken up into two parts when it should have worked better as one longer movie.

I saw on reddit I think that Hiiragi's VA is still relatively new to the industry but I saw a HUGE improvement in his voice acting in this movie, the range he gave to Hiiragi is amazing!

SCENE REACTIONS

This scene was so funny I CACKLED Uenoyama and Hiiragi with their catty energy I LOVE THEM

2. I fell off my couch at this scene HHAHAHA

While Uenoyama's face is funnier in the manga, something about the animated rocket launch from earth JUST GETS ME HAHHAHA. Ok serious talk though how did I not notice that when Uenoyama got confessed to and when Haruki told him he's about to debut, his brain turns into astronaut footage? I think it's a very smart way to illustrate that for Ue, music = love and one cannot exist without the other.

3. OMG Uenoyama's face HAHAH awww man I know he's bummed as hell at Mafuyu's "I'll think about it later" (to the debut proposal) but his face, Ueki and Itaya's faces send me straight to heaven

You know how Ue feels? Our munchkin cat feels like he just proposed to his lover and his lover said, hmnnn I'll think about it. 😭 Chemical, emotional, physical, psychological damage right here>>>

4. The voice acting here from Hiiragi's VA Fumiya Imai SLAPS SO HARD

It's definitely giving deja vu, similar energy to Uenoyama panicking about Mafuyu, gosh I love Hiiragi and Uenoyama's baby gay panics it's so cute.

5. Kageyama is that you?!

6. The sound design and use of silence in this entire scene....incredible, showstopping, amazing, impactful yes yes yes

7. This scene animating Shizu's flashback to childhood was really well done.

It's interesting that in the movie they didn't speak too much about Shizu being transferred from foster home to foster home, or what he had to do to get by. But also, in the manga, I'm pretty sure that they didn't have this scene of a child Shizu closing his hands over "precious stone" but I think it absolutely elevated my connection to Shizu as a character. It really shows that he believes he has been selfishly holding Hiiragi back and that he has been trapping Hiiragi all this time. It gives so much more context to what he did next which if it wasn't clear already, he tried to push Hiiragi away in order to free Hiiragi from him. 8. HOLY SHIT wow goddamn I would not want to live where Akihiko is living oh my 💀💀💀

Watching this scene animated with the noise of the highway really highlights how bad Akihiko's living conditions are. I flagged this because in the Given Manga sequel 10th mix [SPOILER AHEAD], there is this whole thing of Akiharu's disparity with their living conditions so....this is interesting....just putting it out there.....

I also don't remember this scene in the manga, but I really appreciate it, it shows the contrast of Akiharu in the first Given movie vs. this one and how their love and care for each other has evolved! Very cute! I'll make a part 2 soon!

____

My Given Metas

[brainrotsova]

Notes: I've been fantasizing about this moment quite often and I just had to put out somewhere. Sova content is minimal and you know it's  a 'be the change you want to see in the world' type of deal now hahah.

Summary: A drunk Sova and gn!reader spending time together and eventually sharing a moment of heat.

Content warning: - Mentions of battle - Guns and shooting - Alcohol / drunkenness - Public/bathroom sex

------------------------------------------------

It is currently 16:23 or 4:23 PM on Bind. The Northern African heat in Rabat feels unfamiliar to the agents present. Each of you are longing to finish the job quickly. Brimstone, Sova, Jett, Killjoy and you are most likely sweating in your tactical gear. You are hoping, no... Praying for a cold breeze to catch on before the battle. Aside from the heat, the smell of spices and the colorful buildings makes you wonder what this place is like when the evacuated civilians return to this spot to resume life. Sad that Kingdom Industries made this place so much more... well industrial.

"Brimstone, after we win, I'll buy you a drink if you share a memory with us." the voice of the intercom sounds pleasant in your ear-piece. The sweet and playful tone of the Slavic man was a nice distraction from the oppressive heat.

Brimstone chuckles and replies "You got it, Sova. However, I do want to extend this invitation to others here too. The more the merrier."

"I couldn't agree more." Sova replies back. 

Before any other agents can reply to the invitation, another voice goes through. "I see multiple enemies on B! I need back up!". Jett is currently on the B site holding a defensive angle for the long sandy corridor. While Killjoy is hiding to either back up Jett or react to her turret keeping an eye on the elevated spot. Your muscles start tensing up and you run towards your new defensive position. Brim is just behind you and is bringing up the new coordinates on his device to smoke off the attackers for easier kills.

Sova on the other hand decided to push deeper into A site to make a flank from behind. Readying his bow to catch any information and seeing the progress of the enemy attack. Once he is halfway there, he sees glimpses of the enemy agents. A blond streak of hair and an off-white jacket, the murmuring of the radiovores (the little cuties) and the voice of Gekko... Sova decided not to shoot an arrow yet and waited for the main fight to start.

While Jett was focusing on the corridor, the enemies seemed to have grouped up faster than her allies came to help. The enemy Reyna and Raze swung out together, but luckily Jett managed to dodge just out of the way for any bullets. Or so she thought... Seems like a lucky bullet managed to embed its way in her right shoulder. Jett grits her teeth and tries to relax so she could still shoot. Killjoy was a bit too late to react and decided to join Jett.

"Are you hurt? Where did they shoot you?" said Killjoy worriedly.

"The little shits managed to get my shoulder. It's okay, we can still hold them off. Let's focus back to the task at hand". Jett smiled faintly towards her friend and held a thumb up. The turret started shooting in the same direction as the two were facing. Instinctively Killjoy and Jett peak out once more to shoot at their enemies. By this point two smoke bombs get dropped from the sky and activated upon their landing. Shrouding the potential entrances into thick smoke.

You finally arrive on the site and Brimstone behind you adjusts his ear-piece and informs the team: "Entrances are smoked off, Y/N and me are entering site". The smoke, however, didn't seem to deter Reyna and instead she pushed through and aimed down the corner where she last saw Jett. She didn't anticipate our Killjoy and the turret to shoot at her. The Latina collapsed on the sand. 

"Auf wiedersehen!" chirps the German engineer through the intercom. The enthusiasm was contagious, Jett and Sova couldn't help but smile from the small victory. By this time, you and Brim managed to climb inside the elevated area to hold a defensive position there. Ready to sandwich whoever would try to enter the little area.

Once more another creature escaped through the smoke and the blue radiovore, Dizzy, started shooting mucus at the agents, blinding them before Gekko started to push inside. Luckily for you, Sova decided to silently tail Deadlock and Gekko. He swiftly shot the young man and just like Reyna, he collapsed on the floor. While the impressive precision of Sova saved you here, you decided to dash out of the smokes too to help out the hunter. In the same moment, Deadlock turned around to shoot Sova and was about to shoot as cleanly as he did. Sadly for her, she was weak from the back. The adrenaline rising, you pulled the trigger. So too, did the Norwegian fall.

"You saved me there." said Sova relieved. You blush and quickly shaked your head. "Nah, you first". Both of you chuckle and he nods in approval.

"Seems like the rest have fled" says Jett through the intercom. "Ja, the footsteps are leading back to their own landing spot". Brimstone walks over to you and Sova. He puts his two fingers on the intercom and replies to the two women. 

"Good work, everyone. How is your arm, Jett?"

"Shoulder actually... I don't know. It keeps tensing up even when I'm trying to relax it. Killjoy is helping me stop the bleeding."

"Let's get back to HQ A.S.A.P. then. You did well." said Brimstone proudly. The three of you are making your way over to the landing zone of the helicopter.

On the walk, you look over at Sova and slightly tilt your head towards him. "About the invitation to go drinking. Mind if I join?" you ask. "Absolutely, just make sure you have some stories to tell" he says as he playfully winks at you. "It's a date then!" you absentmindedly say. The blond man couldn't help but blush at your aloof comment. The thought of a date with you made him lose a bit of his composure. Before he could answer, Brimstone chimed in. "A date, huh? Like a throuple then?" he asks laughingly, teasing the both of you. He had noticed before how Sova would look at you. Asking Brim questions about you that usually the other agents wouldn't ask. Like what your schedule would be like that week, when your birthday would be, if you had any allergies ... etc. Other people would say that it's his usual considerate self, but Brimstone had known Sova long enough to know that he was catching on feelings.

The realization of your words dawn on you. "No! No, nothing like that. I meant it in a joking way!" you exclaim to the man. Although a date would be amazing with Sova, you had no idea if he was even into you. There is no point in risking your friendship with him in order to potentially be together. But you would be lying to yourself if you said that there were no feelings. That there were no pining done behind closed doors. Every thought that wasn't purely platonic, you tried to push away. Somehow they still managed to find a way to get inside your head and you'd feel awful about it. 

"I'm just teasing you. I was thinking of going to an Irish pub near our HQ? How does that sound to you two?" replies Brim, while still keeping a playful smile.

"I'd love to! Can't wait to drink cider again! It's been like ages" you reply to Brim.

"Sounds great. I've yet to try Guinness. Had any of those before, Brim?" asks the hunter.

"I've had a few, still really great picks. I think you'd like it Sasha. I might actually join you on the cider." says Brim as he nods at you. "It's settled then; to the Irish pub!". The five of you board the heli and the machine ascends with little to no issues. The inside of the flying vehicle is cool and you kiss the hot North African air goodbye for now. You sit down on the chairs and attach the seatbelt. Most people follow suit, except for Sova who still keeps his eyes peeled for the ground below. Making sure to see the corpses being retrieved by the enemy. As he is about to close the sliding door, he locks eyes with the enemy Sova. He muttered something under his breath and slid the door shut.

The flight took 2 hours with everyone keeping an eye peeled for Jett. You were all worried for her every time she closed her eyes for too long. Fortunately, you all made it back in one piece and Killjoy escorted her Korean friend to the infirmary with Sage. You said goodbye to your remaining teammates and agreed to meet back up an hour later at the main entrance to travel together.

Making your way over to the shower, the relief of your skin breathing again feels amazing. The coarse sand washing away and making space for sweetly scented soap to take its place. After your delightful shower, you open your wardrobe to think about your outfit for tonight. Since it was summer, you'd obviously wear something more causal and open to enjoy the evening air. However, you should probably consider getting a jacket with you too. Just in case. You settle on your favorite band t-shirt and jean shorts. Looking back to the mirror, the outfit seemed half finished. You thought to yourself: "Fuck it, let's fully commit to an alternative outfit. Seems more fitting in the context of this outing anyway". You decided to wear combat boots (other than the ones you wear for your job) and a black leather jacket. There, now this felt more complete. The rest of the hour are spent finishing up the little details of your outfit, adding cash to your pockets, and checking your work e-mails before fully logging off for today.

A knock on the door slightly startled you. "May I come in?", the Russian accent seeping through his speech, but sweet all the same. "You may" you say with a small smile. Sova's head peaks through the door and looks around for a bit to find you on your bed with your laptop. 

"Ah I apologize if I came at a bad time..." he says while opening the door slightly more for him to lean on the door frame.

"I was just reading up on some mails before logging off for tonight. Is something the matter?" you ask him while reading the last few lines of the mail in front of you.

"No, I just wanted to let you know it's time to leave" he says sheepishly. You look at the time in the corner of the laptop and see that you've been making your friends wait for 10 minutes now. "Oh god, sorry about that! I was completely focused on these dumb e-mails. Just have to grab my wallet and I'm ready."

He chuckles and holds the door open for you. "I thought as much" he says laughingly. You hurry along and was about to close the door behind you. Before even touching the door handle, the man's hand brushed yours. "Oh sorry, I wanted to close the door for you" he says. You chuckle and close the door anyway. "It's all good, let's go". 

You hadn't noticed his outfit before. Granted you were too busy scurrying about and grabbing your wallet to have a good look. Sova was wearing an all black outfit, but seemed to prefer having different types of textures on his clothing. The thin, breathable fabric of his black t-shirt seem to lightly tug upon his build. His black colored jeans were just below his waist and gave him a nice contour. It's a simple outfit, but matched well with his piercings and funnily enough with your outfit too. You've never seen Sova change much about his hair, but this time he decided to wear his ponytail higher. Probably because he was suffering from the heat back in Rabat too and needed a fresh night.

"You're looking good, I love your outfit." he says while continuing his walk towards the entrance. You smile to yourself and look at him, beaming a smile. "Thank you, thought I might try a more alternative outfit for tonight" you answer, chuckling a bit.

Finally at the entrance, you see that Brimstone was leaning on the side of the door and looking through his phone. He noticed your footsteps and straightened himself while slowly putting away his phone. "Ah, there you are. Let's get this night started." he exclaims while putting the code in to open the door. The night breeze was cool, but it seems like the air had to still lose its heat of the day. All three of you start walking towards the civilization close to your head quarters. Just like Sova, Brimstone was wearing casual clothing and he was rocking a dark blue t-shirt with white lettering and white shorts. The two men were idly chit-chatting about the planning in the couple of days and promising each other to not get totally smashed tonight. Sova made some space for you to walk in the middle of them and you happily obliged.

It wasn't a long walk, but you eventually made it to the heart of the city. Busy streets, bright lights and many smells and colors swarm your senses. Coming back to this place after an intense mission always feels rewarding. As you guys make your way over to the pub, Brimstone waves a couple of hello's to the locals in town. Many of them speaking Spanish and Brim responding in simple phrases, but it was clear the guy understood what they were saying. By now, you guys have reached the pub and it seemed to be rather busy tonight. Many people were sitting outside and inside of the establishment. Clearly some students and their friends but also a lot of the locals. You managed to find a comfortable spot in one of the corners and seat yourselves.

"Wow, it seems like many people decided to visit this place too. Is that fine with you guys? Would you prefer a calmer café to visit?" asks Brimstone a little embarrassed about the unusual order of things. Both Sova and you shake your heads. "I like it more that way", you say, "I prefer to hear laughter and fun than gunshots any day." Both men laugh at that statement. "We should join them in that case!" says Sova laughingly. All of you order your drink of the menu and the drinks get delivered shortly thereafter. This round is on Brim.

The conversations start out tame: what your plans are for the coming days, any interesting news or tidbits in your life currently, perhaps any new food establishments you've found... Then you guys decided to order a second round. This time being paid by Sova. Conversations this time seem to circle around your reasons to join the protocol. 

"What's your reason for joining, Sova?" you ask. The man slightly laughing. "You can just call me Sasha, we're friends after all..." He smiles warmly at you while reaching out to squeeze your shoulder. "I got invited by Liam (Brimstone's real name) to join the protocol. We were stationed in Russia together to do some spy work on a Kingdom Industries rival. If a friend calls for help, I don't hesitate to help. Besides, traveling and being able to photograph different creatures in my off time is a big bonus." Liam smiles and shakes his head, "You're always so dependable. But god is it difficult to get you out of the office to go and do your thing." Everyone started laughing at the hunter's stubbornness. Sasha asks you about your reason to join. You give them a brief explanation of your situation, after all Liam is already aware of yours and sought you after for that reason.

The third round of drinks get served, by your courtesy. More banter follows naturally too. At this point all of you were started to feel the effects of the booze. It's at this point that Liam was starting to feel sleepy and was calling it quits for tonight. "Friends, I think I'll be taking my leave. It was fun! We should go out again." He nods at you two and packs his stuff to leave. "Take care, old man!" you yell to him as he leaves the establishment. It's only the two of you now.

While sipping on your drinks you noticed that Sasha only had one of his ears pierced and not the other. You decided to ask him about that. 

"Oh, that...", He chuckles to himself, "I got it when I was younger. I was getting into alternative fashion myself. Raving and parties and I think I just wanted to fit in with my mates at the time. Over time, it just became my look. I still really like it. My babushka on the other hand...".

"Your grandma doesn't like it at all?" you ask him laughingly.

"No, she was chasing me around the house. 'How can you ruin your body like that! What will the others say!', that kind of stuff" he says as he takes a sip from his drink. "Now she does seem to like it. Probably understood that it's not going anywhere."

"Do you also happen to have other ones? Or is that the only piercings you have?" you ask him.

Sasha didn't know how to answer that. Truth be told, he did have more. Just none that are meant to be seen in public. He blushes and answers "If we get closer, I don't mind showing you..." Okay maybe he shouldn't have said that. Or could have worded it better. Stupid. Now they're bound to ask more...

You look at him, blushing at the idea of his invisible piercings. They're most likely to be an intimate matter. Another instance of your feelings for this man flaring up in a moment of weakness. You try to shoo those thoughts away. You're with a friend after all. This is an after-work activity with your coworker, no less. But you're also getting drunk, your thoughts fly freely in your head and no amount of willpower seems to put them into check. The butterflies in your stomach once more awoken, fluttering all around.

"The lucky person is in for some surprises it seems" you say, still holding on to your ever deepening blush. But also winking at him, to show your understanding.

"Thank you." He breathes a sigh of relief. He didn't want to make it awkward. Before he could think of an appropriate answer, he blurts out "And I guess it would be ruined for them now." Oops, he made it awkward again. Way to go, Sasha. This isn't the way he wanted to confess. Or hint at it. The hunter wasn't even sure if he wanted to confess in general. Keeping this secret with him till the grave.

"I-is this person-" you try to alleviate his awkwardness. In truth, you found this blushing mess of man in front of you incredibly adorable now. "Fuck" he mutters to himself. Might as well lay out all the cards in front of him.

Both of you kind of just look at each other at in this awkward tension. What is happening? You do know what's happening, but what is this set up. Was he losing his cool? Is he feeling as drunk as you are? But the blond man decided to take the first move of extending his hand towards you. "Listen... Before we do anything rash in this moment. I need to tell you something important." The blush on his face getting darker. He isn't sure if he should be averting his gaze from you or look straight at you. You couldn't help but extend your hand towards his and try to look for his eyes. You keep quiet and nod towards him, gesturing him to continue.

He takes a deep breath and takes a moment to look at you. "I want you to know that I really enjoy our friendship... But I haven't been entirely honest to you." He takes another moment and and bites his lip. His usual judgement escaping him at the moment and he can't really stop his feelings from pouring out. This is probably not the most romantic place to do it, either. They must be hella awkward. Shit. "I like you a lot. And I don't mean it casually. I mean it as in... I sometimes fantasize about spending my life with you, kind of way. Shit, I'm not sober at all..." he facepalms at himself for this under-baked confession. You giggle at this cute display and squeeze his hand. Moving closer to him from your seat. "Go on, Sasha. I'm listening" you say teasingly.

He can't help but laugh too, easing the awkward tension between you. Instead making space for an enticing current. Both you and Sasha feel like you're on fire, the electric feeling flowing through your hands. The hunter composes himself and looks at you straight on. "I love you" he simply says. The smile on your face grows bigger by the second. Sasha matches your expression and kisses your hand in his. You get even closer to him and give him a hug. It feels so comforting to be in his arms. The establishment be damned, the world doesn't exist for you in this moment. "I love you too, Sasha" you reply back to him. Perhaps it isn't the most romantic place to confess your feelings. Both you and Sasha played out many scenario's in your head. None of them were like this. But this is the real deal. Finally.

His face reaches your ear and whispers softly, "Can I kiss you, my sweetheart?". You chuckle and your noses brush each other. You lean in to kiss him. If you were on fire before, now you're blazing. His soft lips were kissing you all over. Each and every kiss feels like a gallon of gasoline being thrown into your blazing fire. Feeling bliss, a feral feeling in your stomach kept creeping up. You wanted him, so badly. Waiting for this moment felt like ages and the man left you all hot and bothered. He broke the kiss and cupped your face in his hands. Looking into your eyes and smiling warmly.

You put your hands on top of his and you lean in closer. The hunter was expecting another kiss, but you went for his ear. "I think you said you'd show me something..." you let the words trail. Your lover turns his head to face you. A bit surprised at this request and smiled deviously at you. 

"I thought you'd want to take things slow." still smirking at you. You move a hand from one of his towards his neck and whisper back. 

"I'm impatient, and you're right here all for the taking." The blond Russian shakes his head, laughing and replied back, "It's a bad trait to have, you know? But I can make an exception this time." He breaks the entrancement from you, finishes his drink and was about to grab his stuff. But you grab his arm and close the distance once more. "I want it now. I don't want to walk and face anyone else, right now. Please, Sasha." He takes a little moment to think. This was probably a very bad idea. A terrible one, even. But damn could he not shake the idea of you on his lap. Feeling you all up and just forgetting about his responsibilities. He grabs your arm and leads you to the bathroom.

The establishment has a unisex bathroom with posters hanging about on all of the walls. Two stalls were provided for the patrons to use. The lust-hungry feeling in your stomach intensifies. You didn't think he'd actually do it. The hunter must be feeling just as hot and bothered as you, if not more. Luckily for you two daredevils, the bathroom seemed to be empty and he takes you in one of the stalls. Once inside, you lock the door behind you. You turn your head back to face him, both of you smirking at this. This is such a dumb decision, you could still back out now.

"If I do anything that you don't like, please tell me. I rather have a good time with you than you regretting a single bit-" but before the considerate lover could finish his words, you plant your lips on him. The roaring fire resumes. Lust-filled, he pins you to the door and growls in your ear. Clearly enjoying himself. He continues to kiss you, putting your arms above your head. You can't help but breathe out small moans of pleasure. He's filling up your senses and your head is so dizzy, almost going blank. The anticipation through the roof. Slowly he trails his kisses lower and lower. You neck piles up kisses and nibbles. He has to keep himself from losing all control and leaving bite marks. You had not given him the permission yet and he had no idea what would make you feel the best. Sensing his hesitation, you whisper to him to let it all go. "Consume me, show me your feelings, Sasha." you breathed out hungrily. You had no idea what you unleashed in him.

Your neck got nibbled, kissed, licked and bitten. Like an animal he just let his instincts and his whims guide him. You couldn't stop yourself from enjoying this side of him. The normally cool and grounded hunter, the strategist and kind-hearted soul was now thrashing around and behaving like a beast. If he had no shred of humanity left, he'd rip your clothes right off of you, claiming you all to himself. He knelt in front of you and unzipped your shorts, making sure to leave kisses and nibs to continue the anticipation. Some moments he'd stop what he was doing and look at you with an unfamiliar look of a hungry predator. It sent you shivers down your spine.

It wasn't like him to be the one kneeling, but he couldn't help himself here. He longed a while now to taste you. Nothing holding him back now, the booze probably played a role in this too, he got to act on his dirtiest fantasies. He just hoped you didn't mind this version of him. Behaving like this would sent a lot of people into a deep shame. Sasha on the other hand didn't care. He wanted to show all of him, there should be no secrets between you now. This was him, the dirty little animal.

You opened your legs more for him to find your sweet spot easier. Your breath hitched and you didn't care either if the other patrons would hear your moans. You just focused on your little love bug. Grabbing his hair, tightening your grip every time he gave you a wonderful sensation. More and more you wished to pleasure him back. To feel the heat of his tip and have him give you a taste of his own poison.

The sensations, the hungry motions, the lustful eyes, the growls and moans of pleasure... Everything came to a crescendo when your climax reached you. Mewing Sasha's name over and over like a spell. You couldn't help but push his face deeper into you, to tighten your legs, to hang over him and ride out your orgasm. Sensing your finish, Sasha removes his lips from your delightful spot and looks up at you. Satisfied with his work, he licks his lips and kisses you there one last time before getting up. Feeling weak, you grab on to his t-shirt. Taking your shallow breaths. "I hope you enjoyed that, my dear." he whispers to you while embracing you and nuzzling your nose. Breathing in his air, he smells just like you. 

"C-can I taste you?" you ask, still all up in your feels. 

"Here?" he asks, while he strokes your face. 

"I don't want you to go home without your reward" you smirk at him.

"I'm not going to say no to you" he laughs at your boldness, kissing your forehead tenderly. Your butterflies fluttering around once more. Oh, how you love this man. This time you kneel in front of your lover and help him unzip his pants. Pushing past his underwear you can see that he is already quite hard from all this. You push Sasha to sit down. Trying to make him as comfortable as possible before you feast yourself.

You put your arms over his lap and take a good look at the member. Coming closer to his own sweet plaything, you open your mouth and swirl your tongue around his tip. Occasionally kissing it and letting your teeth brush softly onto it. His eyes were focused on you and your tongue, clearly reeling from the delicate sensations. His hands stroking your cheeks, but it was clear he was doing his absolute best to behave and give you a chance to explore him.

Cheekily, you sometimes dared to take a part of him in and look at him while you did. He would try to hold your look, but clearly was faltering and it made him weak. "I can't take it anymore, I want to push you so deep, you choke on me." he says under his breath. The words dripping from the lust for you. His legs shaking at this point and he's clearly being so needy. It made you blush quite hard, he really doesn't seem to have any filter right now. Not that you minded, you'd happily take his orders. He deserved a reward after all.

"Go ahead, I'll take you anytime" you teased him with your devilish grin. 

He grabs his own toy in his hand, the other gripping your hair. Rubbing himself on your lips before demanding you open your mouth for him. He pushed himself into you, groaning at the wetness. "You would make for such a good fuck toy" he whispers to you before fucking your face. Even though you already had your fill, you could feel the heat pool back into your stomach. He was being quite rough and seemed to enjoy it when your teeth would brush up on his sensitive spots. His breath was so irregular you had no idea if he was trying to edge himself on your throat or was about to climax himself. Your question would be soon answered once you felt a thick liquid enter your throat. He let out a relieved sigh and softens his grip on you.

Realizing he didn't even let you know of his condition nor warning you for the shot, he quickly recomposed himself. "A-are you okay? I'm so sorry, I wasn't thinking..." You wipe away the excess cum off of your face and get up. Like last time, before he could finish his sentence, you go to sit on his lap and kiss him while wrapping your arms around him. Reciprocating the kiss and hug, he tries to brush your hair back to normal. 

"I love you dearly, I hope you had fun tonight" he says sweetly. He plants a kiss on your cheeks.

"Thank you for this amazing night, Sasha. Let's get back home".

[heybiji]

hi!!! i just wanted to say i really love all of your MASKS stuff. i'm something of a newbie when it comes to the TTRPG community, but MASKS seems to be not very well-known and i think that's a real shame. i'm a huge fan of old-school superhero-adjacent stuff, especially the silver- and bronze-age ones!

by the way, i was wondering if you'd be willing to share some tips for a first-time GM? you don't have to if you'd rather not! i just figured i'd try asking since i was planning on GMing a MASKS campaign for some of my friends later, but despite my decade's worth of roleplaying experience i've never been in a TTRPG campaign nor a GM (or similar) role before

Thank you so much!! I was just lamenting about how I felt bad for the MASKS tag because it is now flooded with all my npc nonsense hahah so this is really nice to hear.

It's awesome you're planning on running a MASKS game for your friends!! There is an indispensable post on twitter I saw that has a LOT of great tips for running MASKS that I recommend checking out. But for my own personal tips that are just me things, here's what I got. Sorry it's gonna be extremely long-winded, it may take a few months to read through it.

(Note: I am also hugely into RP and probably put more into it than what is necessary, especially with MASKS which is meant to be able to be played out of the box. It was definitely not played out of the box in our case because I require a lot out of myself and everyone else to feel good about running something. if anyone else wants to continue seeing me as a normal human being please don't click the Keep Reading)

Since you're running it, make the world interesting to you. If the world runs around themes you're personally interested in then you'll have a much easier time coming up with answers on the fly. For me, themes I'm interested in that lend themselves well to a superhero world: money, power, family, celebrity, media, the 24 hour news cycle and the desensitization of violence. Because I'm interested in this stuff anyway, wrapping a world around them makes it much simpler for me to figure out how the world ticks and thus how the characters fit into it and how the world reacts to them, and I am DESPERATE to find out how the characters react to all the questions and expectations the world is imposing upon them.

Make sure your players have a good grasp of the tone of story so they can make characters that gel well within it. For me the tone is a lil more adult because I'm not personally into younger morality tale stories in tone, it's pretty grounded, and I think comedy and tragedy work hand in hand so I lean into them.

Talk. A lot. Talk about the characters, talk about the world. MASKS is fun because it's a LOT of talking and figuring out the narrative together. It's not a lot of crunchy mechanics, it's all around seeing how the characters react to the world narratively, all hurt and comfort and emotions which (for me) requires people to have a good grasp on their characters and the world. I like to give my players "homework" where I ask them a question involving their characters in some way like "what hero did your character look up to as a child?" so they get to come up with past heroes, or "How does your character feel about _____?" etc etc. The only fans are gonna be your table and fans love to talk so be the biggest fans of the PCs!!

Figure out your framing. I know in MASKS they suggest framing it like a comic book, and basically talking about the frames on screen. For me, because I'm more into movies and tv than comics, I frame it like that. So I have an active "camera" in play during sessions and will ask things like "would anyone like to grab the camera?" to encourage the players to put the character into a scene or "what does the audience see as the camera focuses in on your character in this emotional moment?" There is a LOT of playing up to the camera and framing the sessions as episodes of a show, so it's like, okay, you have several options but what is going to be interesting for the audience to see? I find this encourages the players to have their characters take bigger swings and feel comfortable letting us into how their character is feeling because it all looks GREAT on camera. The camera loves it. The PCs are the story after all.

Because I frame it a show, I also like to play individual ending songs over the "credits" at the end of each episode. So I asked my players to make playlists for their characters so if I feel an episode had a lot of emotional focus on one character in particular, I can play one of their songs at the end of the episode! I also made a general MASKS playlist with a bunch of songs from the era we set it in (2004) to pull from. It's a fun little addition that I really enjoy and that I hope makes it all feel more special.

The Dino Donut Effect: create landmarks in your world. (OK THIS IS GONNA BE LONG BUT WORK WITH ME HERE) They don't have to be locations, more solid landmarks of the story that the characters can refer back to and lean on to make the world feel more "real." I call it the Dino Donut Effect because in our world the thing that made everything click into place was talking out the backstory of one of the PC's figuring out they had the power negation ability. We were talking one night trying to figure it out; we wanted the character to fall out of a building and be caught by a flying superhero and accidentally turn off their powers, so they toss the kid to another flying supe whose powers also get turned off. But we were like... holy shit what is the height of a building needed that can handle this much action in the air without them hitting the ground in 3 seconds. So after a long night of talking about terminal velocity and looking at Splat Calculators we figured out the height of the building, and we needed them to crash into something that wouldn't fuckin kill them. The first suggestion was a truck full of bananas. Nah. We landed on a giant balloon that could take the impact. And the balloon became a giant T-Rex holding a donut that was the mascot of the city's beloved decades old donut shop Dino Donut. And so we decided that one of the two flying supes grabbed onto the kid and the other and flew into the giant balloon to try and keep them all alive, which destroyed the balloon, which was a city institution, and there was a crowd of children there that day that saw their friend Dino Donut die. Killed by a superhero. The balloon deflated loudly so it sounded like Dino Donut was screaming in agony. All the kids were traumatized (screaming crying throwing up), the city was furious because everyone loved Dino Donut, it was constantly in the news cycle, and it ruined the career of the supe that "killed Dino Donut." AND THEN THEY REPLACED THE DINO DONUT BALLOON WITH A LAME "UPDATED DESIGN" DINO DONUT STATUE which everyone hates and people consider to be a memorial to the old Dino Donut. ANYWAY, the Dino Donut effect is that now all the PCs have one single incident to refer back to that they all have feelings about. A couple of them were there that day and heard Dino Donut scream, one is now the protege of the disgraced superhero that killed Dino Donut so she feels uncomfortable talking about it, there's the kid that was saved that day but was sworn to secrecy by the supe so no one would find out about his power negation ability, and then there's the kid that wasn't there because she's an alien that just arrived to earth and now the kids have to explain the incident to her with all their varying opinions. Now the PCs' meeting spot is at a Dino Donut. Having this one solid incident that is both funny and kind of goes into the themes of the world has been an absolute treat. Creating "landmarks" like that in the world has done so much and now I'm like okay I'm gonna try to do this moving forward with any other thing I run.

anyway these are my extremely specific to me tips. my RP standards are kind of high which makes me a bit of a terror but also when the flowers bloom from it it feels GREAT. i'm not sure if this will help but hopefully there is something there that can be useful!

MASKS is fun and simple once you get the hang of it, though, so I'm sure whatever you do you and your players will have a lot of fun! especially if you're someone who is into RP which is the background I'm coming from too; MASKS is extremely narrative! i'll be looking in the tag for your game hehe

(The Day Dino Donut Died art by JD)

[betaminshitto]

What’s your favourite thing about shuggy cross guild and mishanks? Why you ship them?

what i like most about those ships is BUGGY i love teasing and tormenting and driving that clown up the wall! I guess i get the most out of it with Shanks because of their past and unresolved tensions hahah... also i love making myself feel bad over fictional characters and they give me that good pain! They make me laugh but also grind my teeth in agony...

As for cross guild, well, it was the thing that motivated me to pick up op again (i was stuck at fishman island for a few years), i needed to see what the fuck was that combination of characters teaming up all about!? And what do u kno...it was about tormenting Buggy...which i love to see... and also about giving him the spotlight he deserves (even if it was the result of failing upwards one too many times but i believe in his odd charisma) and the means to chase his dreams again! I really just like Buggy ok!! Cross guild is hilarious as a very dysfunctional polycule - but really, while Buggy is their punching bag (the violence is very much played for laughs and i genuinely feel bad for him but as i said i like pain) he also stood up for what he believed in when it mattered and challenged croc and hawk's pessimistic/realistic outlook on what it means to be a pirate.

for the record I can't say i actively ship mishanks really, honestly i didn't care about them as characters enough (i swear i care about them a little bit more now) for me to get invested in their relationship. Although i can see them having this fling in their youth which Shanks fumbled too but unlike Buggy, Mihawk has standards and, as my friend put it, deserves someone who owns more than two pairs of pants. Which brings me to crochawk which you did not ask about but i just want to elaborate on that too. At first i didn't pay their dynamic too much attention because of my lack of interest in Mihawk (again, sorry) but slowly warmed up to it, they both have a distrust in others and i think they'd be very good at giving each other the personal space they need while also being fucking weird about forming a genuine bond because idk if they have ever had a normal and balanced relationship in their life (i also ship dofuwani so yeah let's just throw one more ex to the mix).

Alright! Enough rambling! Hopefully you got something out of this and if you didn't...too bad. Also final note: even though I'm a shuggy truther myself it's all just my personal interpretation. Shipping is supposed to be fun! Or a way for you to experience intense emotions you don't really get to experience in your personal life or whatever! Don't take me too seriously im begging you

[waitingonher]

heyyy! congrats on 800 followers :) could i request a matchup for pjo?

gender prefrence - male

about me - brown hair, blue eyes, 6'0 tall, and i have a skin condition (psoriasis). i am good listener and an observer, i also stress quite a lot. i love the oceon, music, food and sleeping, reading and dancing. fav colors are blue, yellow and orange. i would say i'm an ambivert, if i feel comfortable around you i will be weird and a total yapper. i would also say i'm kind and funny, and a little sarcastic. (i'm a pisces, btw, hshaha)

love languages - words of affirmations and physical touch <3

hobbies/interests - reading, singing (i have a terrible voice hahah), dancing, painting, drawing, listening to music and watching movies

ideal first date - i would love to do something active and fun, like karouke or going to an amusment park, that way getting more confortable with the person, but i would also like a walk by the beach or going to the cinema. (i don't know if on the first date, but i would love to go stargazing with my significant other)

traits i look for in a partner - loving and caring, i am a little sensitive, and i need someone who is understanding because sometimes i get in my head and just distance myself from others. i also would love someone sarcastic and funny. i don't have any physical prefrences.

your matchup is . . . jason grace!!

you and jason are like two peas in a pod! 

while i do get the sense that jason is also more of a listener and observer, that just makes for better conversation! it’s like he’s almost expecting you to disappear the next moment with the way he hangs onto every single word you speak. his gentle gaze switches every few words from your eyes to your soft lips and sometimes you struggle to maintain his earnest eye contact. it’s even worse because jason’s not even purposefully trying to make you feel so flustered, so he’s worried when you stop midsentence to compose yourself.

jason’s literally the best conversation maker too! he knows just the right things to say, whether it be simple input or advice. with experience from his previous role as praetor, jason’s picked up a knack for conversation. there’s never a dull or awkward moment with him because he can so easily keep conversation flowing! 

you and jason have an ongoing monthly tradition where you two swap annotated books for the other to read! at the beginning of each month, you guys select a book, read and annotate it, and then swap books at the end of the month! 

he always loves when you choose a romance book because your annotations are basically a combination of little doodles and some form of “that’s so us babe!” 

compared to others, jason is definitely more confident with giving others words of affirmations than receiving them. again, as a praetor he was responsible for so many people that it became natural for compliments and such to leave his mouth. but the second any sort of compliment comes back to him, especially from you, it’s almost like he short circuits. 

you love how your boyfriend can so naturally whip up a compliment akin to a shakespeare sonnet, but the moment you even make a simple comment about his hair looking good, he awkwardly stumbles over his words as his cheeks flush pink. 

star gazing dates with jason!! 

one night, jason pointed out the brightest shining star and dedicated it to you, a reminder of his love for you and how he’d always make it home to you. so now, every time you guys star gaze, it’s the first thing you look for <3

your second contender was . . . leo valdez!!

. . .

author's note: THANK YOU SO MUCH!! i hope you enjoy <3 thanks for participating ! also i searched it up and pisces and cancer (jason's zodiac) are extremely compatible so... 👀

[creehd]

SURPRISE!! its me again, ive moved into your walls.

Now... *flips through notes* You said Shredder is a Yakuza boss, which is just a delectable choice, and i shant ever get over it--

--BUUUUUT because hes Yakuza, does that mean hes...covered in tattoos? 👁👁

I meeean, i can kinda see some tattoos in the reference you drew for him, but i think we might need a shirtless reference, fOR SCIENTIFIC REASONS OF COURSEEEEE, absolutely no other reason.

I definitely dont wanna just see that buff man shirtless hahah nooooo *heavy breathing*

BUT ON A NOT SIMPING NOTE--

What is the Turtle's living situation like??? Is it still in the sewers? Do Casey and April visit them there? How different is their home in the AU compared to the modern depictions? I cant imagine sewers in the 20's were to much different than sewers now, but im still very curious :]

Sorry for the never ending questions skajsksks

YES shredder does have tattoos! Alot of em are traditional Japanese dragon design ones, I will map out what his chest and back tats look like don't you worry-

AS FOR THE SEWER QUESTION IM GLAD YOU ASKEDDD I made the entire turtle lair in the sims bc of this ask SO here we are,

The entrance to the sewers is pretty basic, shoot off to 6 open rooms,

Splinters room!! He's a pretty solitary guy so he has a place for meditation and a cozy lil chair he falls asleep in constantly.

Here's the rec room/kitchen, Lotta areas for food making and eating, and a piano Mikey plays every now and again for everyone! They also have a dinky little TV set donnie managed to snag. (Infront the couch)

The dojo!! Pretty basic, this is where the boys do their training!

The bathroom/storage! Very rustic and stolen and or built by Donatello. Lotta extra stuff splinter brought over from japan and misc living stuff for the family.

Now for the boys rooms!!!

Leo and Donatello share a room, leo keeps model trains and tons of books donnie can't house on his side, he's also got several Japanese tapestries to keep in touch with his heritage. He also has alot of art deco posters, he enjoys the colors and movement of them. He also keeps track of scout badges he's collected, because while be can't BE a boyscout, he loves the idea of scouting and following that code of values.

Donnies side is much more technical. He tinkers and builds things while listening to the radio, he'll turn it on for both him and Leo while they do respective activities. He also has Japanese tapestries, mostly because when the boys were small splinter got them each their own, and he never took it down. He's got tons of books and maps, and more physics leaning posters.

On the other side of the sewer, Raphel and Mikey share a room, in the middle they have a Foosball table they both enjoy from time to time, but on raphs side, he's got a punching bag (go figure) and a stereo radio phonograph, along with a chest of his things, his favorite stuffed toy, some art deco posters and a painting Mikey made him, along with a portrait of Casey, and a cow skull. He's taken the tapestry splinter gave him down. Says it clashes with the rest.

And last but not least! Mikey has the brightest part of the sewer, he enjoys plants, and taking care of them, he says they add life to the home. Along with several paintings he's done and art deco posters he enjoys! He's got a desk for Journaling and an easel for his portraits. He's also got his Japanese tapestry hung, it gives him inspiration.

All and all, not too different from their modern counterparts! I tried to make my little diorama art project as time period accurate as I could, for the sims yknow, but I think I did a pretty good job expressing my vision (although there was a sewer grate I COULD NOT find for the life of me so I just pretended don't look at it too hard)

April and casey visit on occasion, after all the portrait of Casey was painted by mikey!! Raph just felt... sentimental about keeping it. April visits less, due to grime, but she cares about her friends and can look past it after a good shower.

AND DONT YOU WORRY- I'll make a shredder tattoo masterpost, he's not covered head to toe, but he's pretty well inked up..

I had fun working on this alot tho!! Never apologize ur giving me an excuse to post about my brain worms

Questions or suggestions??? ASK BOX IS OPENNNNN ASK ME ABOUT MY 20S AU

[piscescrown]

My thoughts on each and every element + zodiac signs:

Earth signs:

You guys are incredible. It's amazing how different you are depending on your zodiac sign but HOW WELL THEY WORK both independently and in groups. THEY GET THINGS DONE. I truly admire that 💪💕. The dedication to every aspect and the loyalty. 1000/10.

Water signs:

Well, well, well. I'm a spicy pisces too 😅. But I think we water signs are so cool! Maybe we are a bit less responsible than earth signs and maybe we wait more to get things done hahah but I think our inner world is what makes every one of us special. And people notice those kinda things and they admire that too, even though in my humble opinion I haven't seen cancers be as introverted and sensitive as pisces and scorpios, idk.

(Also side note: why are scorpios so handsome?)

Air signs:

If I'm completely honest, you guys are out of your mind. How can you have so many (maybe good) ideas but at the same time be such a disaster and such a mess of a person??? I truly don't understand xD you guys give absolute chaotic vibes.

Anyways, libras are also cute and have a great style in fashion but they are also very quirky and don't know when to shut up. Like geminis. Aquarius has to speak more tho, stop ghosting people!! 🫠😂

Fire signs:

So much chaotic but vibrant vibes if that makes sense. Y'all have good vibes and are so active! It's difficult to get bored with you but sometimes your ideas are a bit out of hand lmao. If I had to complain, I'd say that Leos have to stop thinking they need to be the center of attention at all times and that aries also need to calm down bc they are really scary when they get angry lmaoo. But actually they are unmatched and really funny 🔥.

That's all, thank you for reading and please don't take this too seriously lol, it's basically my opinion on people I know and it's not something that I think of every zodiac sign, there are ALWAYS exceptions and astrology isn't a science! But it's entertaining :D.

With love, Pisces ♓️.

[alexistudies]

friday, july 19th 2024

i know i haven't been super active on here but i promise, i HAVE been studying!! hahah. especially because shortly after i was safe from catching COVID from a lab mate, I caught COVID. But we're all good now. Testing negative, no more symptoms.

While being locked away in my apartment, I actually started reading more papers which is a habit I'm trying to build for my second year. I will have comps at the end of my second year and i want to be prepared. I also took the leap of faith and started diving into some big data by trying to organize it to do the analyses I need to do. I also started teaching myself the analyses I need to do by taking some notes and watching tutorials LOL.

some exciting academic things coming up:

alzheimer's assoc conference in Philly in a week-ish

returning to lab for data collections

finalizing some things for this administrative supplement

I'm more active on my studygram these days so catch me there: lexthephdstudent

[yridenergyridenergy]

Hiii, greetings from southeast asia! ❤️

i like your blog btw

And i wanna ask you as new fans of Dir, what do you think about all member? Please describe each member and tell me who is ur favorite?

Hello, sorry for the delay! I knew that this question required a thoughtful answer.

Welcome to Dir en grey! They're frickin' awesome.

Hm I'm terrible at describing people. Essentially, none of them are mean or offensive. They are all very considerate individuals. What's special about Dir en grey is that they are not social and they do not profusely share with fans, so whenever they do or that they interact among themselves, we all go gaga because by that point, we're craving for it hahah.

In terms of them individually, hm, I can't say that Toshiya imposes himself, but he is definitely not a passive bassist. He moves very emotionally to the songs and it's super heartwarming to see him smile on stage. Recently, he opened his online fan site and he seems very generous and, again, very thoughtful with what he gives to fans, after all those years of drought.

Die has a kind of mysterious air to him, but he is rather communicative and energetic. For years, apparently he has been sharing daily updates/pictures on his online fan club.

When it comes to Shinya, he's a stoic angel hahah. He really has his signature look and his facial expression remains neutral whenever he plays the drums, but he beats them like a beast. I love his compositions because they're so atypical and varied, you can never get bored of the melodies. I also love his style of humor, which you can see on his YouTube channel.

Kaoru gives the impression of really being serious, but he is quick to kind of fool around too. He is known as the leader but he is clearly super laidback. From what I know, he is rather generous and attentive with fans too, and his art is very cool and gloomy!

Over the years, I've come to love them all quickly enough, but Kyo was definitely my favourite member of Dir en grey from the start. At this point, it might be easier to find words that do not describe Kyo than limit myself to a few words that do describe him. His performance on stage is striking, his lyrics aren't necessarily genius but the way he delivers them, wow. I don't know any other singer who comes up with vocal melodies that are this diverse and so felt. And I've looked, I'm open to discoveries but nothing's a match for his creativity. What else to say without stretching this post on forever... Hm, I've definitely known him to be moody, but he just expects a raw and true response from people like what he gives us, and he can't be bothered to fake. As a last note, I'll make an honorable mention to every "smirky" thing he does, whether on stage or in his various other activities. He is not outright laughing while slapping his leg for example, but once in a while he does shenanigans and you can just imagine a smirk behind it. And if you love Kyo, please give his second band, sukekiyo, a chance! It's amazing and you can witness another side of Kyo!

Even though I gave myself some time to think of a reply, this is in no way perfect or eloquent... Please explore my posts from this year and the past ones and you should notice some traits from each member! Perhaps the compilations are a good starting point?

[garbage--account]

⚡️Third registration of IE nation citizens + professional activities⚡️

Side note : i took a little break from tumblr, my blog was glitching so hard it was pratically unusable. Once fixed, i was too focused on work and tired afterward. Don’t worry, IE nation will still rise no matter what but i will probably post less posts about it on weekdays, so don't panic if it happens, nothing is cancelled. I'll try to post about it the week-end tho. Anyway, here is the registration.

Current population : 43 📈

@choberr (fanartist/fanfiction novelist/time travelling drug dealer/headcannon craftman) @randomnumber20 (bodyguard of the future ruler) @soccerpunching (CEO of Gouenji/cryptid/overanalyst/headcanon craftman) @aroacemarkevans @miskas-reblog-blog @lazitoelgato (fanartist/headcanon craftman) @marmolao @sceptile11 @hsohangout @majidekansha (therapist) @nawemichi @homango (headcannon craftman) @garbage--account (zoo keeper) @corviies @drownednovelty @petuniapolar (journalist/shipping manager/time travelling drug dealer) @m1zukam3dian @nanairomelette @feisaru @pollymolly12 (fanartist/OC creator/fanfiction novelist) @queen-jass-blog (sorceress) @asbestos-11 (intergalactic trafficker/fanartist) @jellyavi @ubizoide @localkatze (historian) @cows-quack @saryuuchan @inazumaclown @hessadvv @arugan (time travelling drug dealer/overanalyst/fanartist/ship manager/headcanon craftman) @iho6hi @kidoyuuto @ur-fav-fuhirou-shiper (rarepair stan) @henry-old-hollywood @imtheprinceofthecastle (imnotk ?) @unichurro

~ Let me know if i forgot someone and don't forget to declare your professional activity. Btw, i think the last 2 ones changed their username : can you confirm it's you pls ? ~

List of candidates for election (we still accept new ones) :

@sobashahzadi (Formal introduction : https://www.tumblr.com/sobashahzadi/726798693118902272/hello-there-dear-garbage-account-here-is-my?source=share) @lyssacraft @melancholycivet (mass alien weaponery producer) @eikooowie (fanartist) @eky11 @honeycrashed

~ Don’t forget to present your electoral program ~

Some notable propositions/ideas and other stuffs to implement :

Check out this beautiful flag (made by @eky11)

2. A discord server for our nation (submitted by several citizens)

3. Currency : Inazumadigit (ingame's money) (submitted by @asbestos-11)

4. National animal symbol : lesbian atsuya (by @honeycrashed and/or @nanairomelette) or @lazitoelgato (they proposed themselve) or beta-fubuki (@garbage--account)

5. Athem : IE openings mashup (submitted by @asbestos-11 too)

~ I think that's all for the moment... we are still open for propositions and ideas. If no one opposes, we can make those official already, let me know in the comments? Regarding the national animal symbol, i will open a zoo later and there will be every contestants for it. Shall we have a vote to determine which animal will represent our nation ? ~

Well, idk how to end this post....

We rise. WE RISE.

[l1l1l3t]

i took about... 8... centuries to make a post like this BUT IT'S ALL FINE. /no its not

hahah my name! how cool! wow! 😆🤗💚💚💚

♣︎. HI HI!!! my name is Linda, but u can call me Delta or Lili or whatever u want, woohoo!;

♠︎. im a multifandom, minor and a cartoonist =^);

◆. she/her;

♥︎. as said before i am a multifandom, but that doesn't mean I am active in ALL of them! so here is the list of fandoms i am active in: Lemon Demon, Invader Zim, LEGO (both games and movies), DC or MARVEL...

★. I LOVE/HATE DIB MEMBRANE here i dont talk much about him (at least not in english) but i really dont shut up about him; so just dont be surprised if the "Official Fanclub for DIB MEMBRANE ♡" turns into a free hate group about this boy.

OBSERVATIONS NOTES ....

im Brazilian so YES im going to talk about my country, in my language and post things that maybe u (non-Brazilian) just wont understand !

dni: basic + proship shipp prochip IDK

[prettyboyhowl]

Hi is this still alive?

Hi! Sorry everyone for just disappearing, hope you've all been well! I haven't been very active on tumblr at all for a few months now I think - first it was exams and then I went on a long trip and only returned a few days ago lol

In short, yes this is still alive... but progress will probably be slow.

I've just started my final year of school so there may be less time for me to write/more stress -> struggle to gather motivation for writing, but we'll see how it goes! Either way, I don't plan on giving up because I love my characters and I want to see this story through to the end, even if that takes some time :)

(side note: i haven't been keeping up with reading IFs either so i'm definitely hoping to catch up soon hahah)