#my mom would ask if we needed smth from the store (while we were there)

[ububunes]

I wish I had a tail and I could spin around in little circles and have the biggest happiest smile ever and my tail would be super fluffy and soft nods nods nods (has no idea what any of that would look like)(just likes the idea)

[lovingmyselfcore]

Skate Into My Heart

Chapter Three; Uh oh

BESTIES

I'M ALIVE AND I DID THE WRITING THING

@ciaraloves (or @perseusjackson-jasongrace ig) LOOK AT ME DOING THE THING

As soon as Nico left the locker room, Piper pounced on him. Literally.

He was forced to take a step back and caught her by the shoulders, “What’s up?”

She was practically vibrating with excitement, “Annabeth’s back!”

“Really?”

“Yeah! Come on!” She grabbed his hand and yanked him through the hallways and into the main rink where a crowd of people had formed next to the bleachers.

It was the rest of the team and in the center was Annabeth, a duffle bag slung over one shoulder, looking exhausted as all hell but she was grinning as the team peppered her with questions and play-by-plays of the practices she’d missed.

Piper shouldered them into the center so Nico was directly in front of Annabeth, Piper on one side and Calypso on the other.

“Hey, Nico,” Annabeth said, still grinning. She stepped forward for a hug and he let her, burying his face into her neck and breathing, already feeling the responsibility leaking from his tight shoulders. Annabeth was like a big sister to him, not that he’d ever admit that, but still.

“You want to get out?” Nico whispered into her neck.

“Yes,” She whispered back emphatically. Nico could barely stop himself from laughing but as they pulled apart he saw the genuine relief in her eyes and felt himself worrying. He needed to talk to her, about the team and skating, about Will and of course, if she needed to talk about why she’d been gone for so long, he’d do that too.

Apparently, Calypso recognized that too and, bless her heart, muttered something to Leo, and together they captured the team’s attention, allowing Nico to tug Annabeth away from the crowd and out of the rink. She sighed as soon as they were ejected onto the city streets. Nico stuck an arm out and she smiled and linked their arms.

“Where are you headed?” Nico asked as they walked the short distance to the car garage.

“Oh, probably just my apartment.”

Nico nodded, “I wasn’t sure if you’d be staying with your dad or not.”

She shook her head, “He doesn’t even know I landed yet. I’ll head over in the morning.”

Her voice was stiff and Nico took that as his cue to change the subject. “So I have something to confide in you.”

She perked up almost immediately and he swallowed hard. But she just looked at him with those gray eyes and he reminded himself that this was Annabeth. That she wasn’t going to get angry with him.

At least, he hoped not.

“I’m talking to one of the hockey players,” He said casually.

Her grip on his arm stiffened and he braced himself but she was still just looking at him.

Finally, she grinned, “So when you say ‘talking to’...”

He groaned and felt himself flush, “Oh, shut up! Just friends.”

She hummed and released his arm to dig for her keys in her jacket pocket. “Is he nice?”

“No, he’s a dick,” Nico said sarcastically.

Annabeth rolled her eyes, but she was still smiling. “I don’t know why I even bother.”

“He’s blonde,” Nico offered.

“Oooh,” Annabeth drawled.

He rolled his eyes and she burst out laughing, her voice echoing off the stone walls of the parking garage.

“Is he gay?” Annabeth asked.

Nico nearly flinched and passed it off with another eye roll, “I don’t know, Annie, that’s not something that’s come up in casual conversation.”

She glared at him and Nico, being the mature adult he is, stuck his tongue out at her. She did it back then shook her head. “Too much time with Percy,” She muttered and Nico snorted. She grinned at him.

“So he’s okay?”

That sobered her immediately. “Yeah. Well, as okay as he can be. I’m only here for like two weeks because he insisted I come back, but I’m leaving as soon as possible,” She glanced sideways at him, “Not to leave you alone again, though.”

He shrugged off the flash of selfish hurt he’d felt, “I’m good, Beth.” But he wasn’t good. He’d just told her about Will, and not even the start of the way his stomach would twist when he saw a new text from the hockey player and not the same twist when he panicked. And that also meant his chances of performing solo again were climbing. He didn’t know how to feel about that part.

“Stop that!” She exclaimed, halting once they’d reached her car.

“Get some sleep, Annabeth,” He said genuinely then smirked a little, “It looks like you need it.”

She threw a balled-up receipt she’d found in her bag at him, “Dick!”

~~~~

“Hey, Nico.”

Nico nearly leaped out of his skin, spinning to see Persephone in the living room.

She snorted, “Didn’t mean to scare you, sorry. Did practice go well?”

His phone buzzed in his pocket, “Yeah. Annabeth’s back.”

Persephone hummed, reaching up to untwist her hair, sending it cascading down her shoulders, “That’s good. I know you’ve missed her,” She said with a knowing look in her eyes that made him shift uncomfortably.

“Yeah, definitely, um, I’m tired we learned some new moves for Regionals today, so,”

“Yeah of course.” She was still smiling.

“‘Night Persephone,”

~~~

Nico flopped face-down onto his bed with a groan. He knew Persephone though he had a crush on Annabeth; he didn’t blame her, he’d never really made it a point that he didn’t. He wished he could come out to her and his dad, he didn’t really have a reason why he hadn’t besides the weight of anxiety on his lungs.

His phone buzzed again, and he wriggled upright to yank it out of his pocket.

Will: Distract me

Will: My mom is driving me insane

Nico grinned to himself, both of them were dealing with mommy issues at the moment.

Nico: idk how you expect me to distract you

Will: Just tell me about snakes or smth

Nico: you think i just have fun facts about snakes on hand?

Will: Yeah?

Nico: good

Nico: cause i do

Will: :)

Nico: snakes can slither 12.5 mph

Will: Good lord

Nico: snakes have internal ears but not external ones

Will: ??

Nico: they can’t create their own body heat which is why theyre in the sun all the time

Will: Hmmmm

Nico: they smell w/their tongues

Will: I thought they had nostrils??

Nico: they do

Will: what

Nico: it’s their Jacobson’s organ my dude it works in mysterious ways

Nico: not really but yk

Nico: sCieNcE

Will: ok….

Nico: if you get bored of snakes i’ve also got a bunch of random cheetah facts

Nico: i love cheetahs

Nico: very cool

Nico: fast cats

Will: Lmao go ahead

Nico: but first

Nico: why’s your mom driving you insane

Nico: if you want to tell me ofc

Nico: not trying to be weird

Will: Nah you’re fine

Will: She wants me to focus entirely on med school and not hockey

Will: She’s trying to get me out of it, actually

Will: Do something ‘respectable’

Will: Not turn out like my dad

Will: Even though dad has literally NOTHING to do with hockey

Will: And in my opinion he’s not bad. Not great. Not awful yk

Will: But hockey’s what’s putting me through med school so

Will: Gods, I really just burdened you with that I’m so sorry

Nico: med school huh

Nico: now i can say i know a doctor

Will: In training

Nico: close enough

Nico: you’re a great hockey player and you're going to be a great doctor

Nico: and you can always talk to me, will

Nico: you’re not burdening me with shit

Will: thanks <3

Nico didn’t understand why he blushed. It was a goddamn emoji. Calm down, Di Angelo.

Will: So we’ve been talking for a few weeks now. Can I call you my friend yet?

Nico snorted, feeling like he was fifteen again, sprawled on his bed, in the dark (because for some reason he didn’t turn his lights on) late at night, texting his- well, anyway.

Nico: yea dumbass

Nico: we’re friends

Will: Nice

Will: Now give me cheetah facts you adorable nerd

~~~

WILL

“Will? You good?”

Will blinked, Jason coming in to focus in front of him. “Uh, yeah.”

“That was believable,” Clarisse said sarcastically from behind Jason.

Will attempted to shake the fog from his head, “Yes,” He repeated.

Jason just blinked at him and Will was formulating an excuse for why he was so tired besides the fact that he’d spent all night talking to a cute figure skater with a ridiculous amount of animal facts stored in his small body when Coach Hedge’s voice boomed from his seat on the bleachers, “Solace! You alive?”

“Yes, coach!” Will shot back.

“Then why are you just standing there? Get back to the game! You too, La Rue and Grace!”

“Yes, sir!” They all barked back.

Clarisse gave him a once over before skating back to her goal and Jason went over to Will’s spot with him, “You sure you’re alright?”

“Yeah, just tired.”

Jason opened his mouth, probably to question why the mom friend of their group was tired enough he nearly tripped over his stick but Will just said, “It’s fine, Jase. It’s not a big deal.”

“Grace!” Coach Hedge screeched.

Jason gave up on trying to interrogate Will and skated back over to his spot.

~~~~

“Mama, please,” Will tried, but his mother cut him off.

“Willaim. Hush. How’s that girl you said you were dating?”

What?

He was silent for a beat too long.

“Oh, baby,” His mother’s thick southern accent drenched her words. “You broke up? I’m so sorry.”

Oh gods, Lou Ellen Blackstone.

Will and Lou Ellen had dated for two months a long time ago, and when they were still dating he’d told his mother about her to get her to back off of his personal life a little. Their break up hadn’t had a huge fallout, Lou Ellen had told him through tears in his living room that she was aromantic. They were still friends, had been even before they dated, actually, and talked to each other pretty regularly.

But the problem was, that had been three months ago, and he hadn’t told his mother about their breakup. He knew she’d ask why, and he didn’t want to out Lou Ellen or make her a devil in his mother’s eyes. So he’d procrastinated coming up with a reason until he’d forgotten about it entirely.

And now it had come back to bite him in the ass.

“Yeah we broke up a little while ago,” He forced himself to sound choked up, which wasn’t hard, giving the way his panicked brain was now sprinting in circles on his lungs. “I just didn’t disappoint you.” Probably the most honest thing he’d said in weeks, but that’ll be unpacked later.

“Honey,” She sighed sadly and Will didn’t know whether or not that was on his behalf or hers.

“Well, it’s okay, because I’m dating someone new.”

“Oh?” He could hear her spine straighten. “Is it someone I know?”

No, mom, it’s not one of the country girls I grew up with.

“No,” He winced at how southern he sounded. He’d been talking to his mother for five minutes. “You don’t know him.”

HIM. Good Gods, Will. Yeah, you came out as bi to your mom, but still, you haven’t actually mentioned a guy to her yet.

She was silent for so long his heart joined his brain in the track meet happening on top of his lungs. “What’s his name?”

He was so she’d spoken that he blurted, “Nico.”

What. The. Fuck. Willaim.

Apparently, his heart had won that damn track race.

“Well, what I was leading up to before you told me about what happened,”

Will hummed non-committally, trying not to sound like he was taking relieved breaths as she spoke.

“The family’s come for a reunion and you should bring that boy!” Will choked on his spit.

“Mom, I don’t know about-”

“No, William. There isn’t a set date yet so we can work around your schedule,” Fuck. “I insist, Will. I need to meet this boy you clearly like very much, even though all you’ve said is his name, a mother knows.”

Umm, what.

“Sure,” Will said, sounding a little strangled. “But we have a game this weekend.”

“Alright, William.” She sounded the way she always did when he brought up hockey. “But as I said, we can work around your schedule and his. Talk to him about it, and let me know.”

“Yeah. Yeah,” Will repeated. “I’ll do that.”

She hung up and he was left staring at the wilting daisies at his kitchen table.

What had he just done?

[dreaming-of-assclass]

AssClass Christmas Fics: Part 1

Group 1 + gift-shopping 🎁

In which Kataoka is tired, Isogai is stressed, Maehara is a wholesome idiot, and Okano and Kimura are the embodiment of chaos.

Genre: Fluff, Humor, Wholesomeness, Slight angst on Isogai’s part

Length: 3,133 words

..................

—————

In hindsight, Megu should’ve known better than to come.

It had seemed innocent at first when Maehara brought the idea up in their groupchat. He wanted all his closest friends to band together and take a trip to the mall for “some good ol’ Christmas gift-shopping.” He said it wasn’t likely they’d get to hang out all together until after winter break. Ok, fair point.

But now, as she sat exhaustedly in the dressing room of some teen store, surrounded by heaps of clothing, she realized she’d made a mistake.

“Hinano, please tell me this is the last one you’re trying on,” Megu begged as she reached for another garment. “We’ve been here for at least an hour and a half.”

“Mmm...I just have to find a matching pair of shorts,” Hinano hummed, at least looking somewhat apologetic. She gave Megu a wink. “After this, we’ll be all done!”

And with that, the smaller girl dashed off, probably in search of one of the store workers.

Megu groaned, giving a pitiful glance at the bag sitting besides her. She’d purchased one outfit, a matching belt, and a set of earrings already...while her friend was still not even close to being done.

“Might as well check what everyone else is doing.” Megu pulled out her phone and texted their groupchat. 

Kataoka: Where are you guys?

She got a reply a moment later.

Maehara: me n isogai r grabbing smth to eat rn

Maehara: but we’re gonna go to some store after

Ah...probably to get some gifts for Isogai’s siblings, Megu remembered fondly. 

“Oh, Megu, she’s still not done yet?” She snapped up to see a somewhat flustered Touka making her way into the dressing room.

The class rep sighed with a tired smile, setting her phone down. She shifted a bit to make room for the other girl. “No, not yet...did you get what you were looking for?”

Touka nodded excitedly, pulling out her gift bag. It was very small and plain-looking, nude with only a red ribbon tied around. She handed it to Megu, a shine in her eyes. “Yes. It’s perfect, exactly what we were going for.”

Megu opened up the bag and reached for the item inside. It was small yet carried weight, and was surrounded by fancy parchment paper. She delicately opened it, careful not to rip anything. “Oh,” she breathed. Touka was certainly right.

It was perfect.

Nestled within the folds of parchment paper was a lovely ornament, shaped like a rose and made of dazzling stained glass. A thousand colors reflected off of it as she gently held it up in the light of the store. 

Touka smiled softly, leaning into her seat. “I thought a rose would be fitting after, y’know, Karasuma-sensei’s love declaration in October,” she laughed. 

“True.” Megu laughed as she carefully set the gift down back into the bag. “No but really, I can’t imagine anything better than this for her. She loves roses and it’s sophisticated, but still...can remind her of our class.”

She patted Touka’s shoulder, her gaze soft. “We made such a good decision entrusting her Christmas gift to be picked out by you.”

Oddly, Touka’s face turned a bright hue of red and she glanced away, clearing her throat. “It’s no problem! I’m happy that I picked something okay.”

Before Megu could question her, their third companion came back in a flurry of more clothing. A pair of pants flew and knocked against Megu’s face, and she wiped it away tiredly. “Hina! You said one more thing!”

Hinano was already turned towards the changing stall, struggling to carry her massive load. “I know, I know, I’m sorry! But they have a sale!”

“Still-!”

“Wait, really?” Touka shot up, her eyes bright. “I gotta go look for some stuff too!” Within seconds, she was dashing towards the racks of clothing in the store, right into the massive crowds of people already scavenging for good sales.

Oh boy. Megu mentally prepared herself for a moment before following her. Might as well take advantage of the sales too, she thought wryly. She had been looking for a new pair of boots lately...

.................

__________

“Yo, how about this one?” Hiroto asked, wriggling his eyebrows and holding up a video game-themed hoody jacket. It was child-sized and looked incredibly tiny against his large frame.

Yuuma looked in his direction, still combing through a rack of items himself. “Cute.” He grinned.

He reached over and touched the material thoughtfully. “Quality seems pretty good too. It’ll last him a while.”

“Yeah!” Hiroto agreed. “It’s super cozy, and will help him a lot in winter.”

“Okay, we can put this in the cart.”

Hiroto obliged and the two boys moved on from the clothing area. “Nothing else?” He questioned, giving a passing glance to aisles around them.

Yuuma hummed. “Well, we got a pajama set for both of them...a dress...two pairs of shoes, and now this hoodie. I’d like to get more but it’s Christmas, right? They’d probably like some new toys, not a ton of clothes.” He laughed.

“Ah, true.” Hiroto pushed the cart towards the toy section, following his best friend’s steady pace. This part of the store was incredibly hectic, and the sound of children’s cries and laughs filled it endlessly. Stressed parents flew around, trying to find the perfect toys. Boxes were everywhere, and it was very much a mess.

He barely caught Yuuma’s wince. As someone who also worked in a service industry, around Christmas time no less, Yuuma was probably sympathizing with the store clerks who’d be tasked to clean up.

They reached a random aisle that ended up holding all the lego sets. “I should get a couple of these,” Yuuma mused, looking around. “They love Legos, especially the bigger sets.”

“Uh huh...” Hiroto grasped his chin in thought, leaning his forearms onto the cart handle. “What about this?” He reached over and grabbed the box set. 

Yuuma leaned over to see it. “A firetruck and station,” he read. “589 pieces.” He smiled, looking up at Hiroto. “Perfect. Let’s grab it.”

“Awesome.” Hiroto was glad he was some kind of help. He knew this time of year was always incredibly stressful for his best friend, who not only had to study but work at the same time. And Yuuma would always buy his family some type of presents, so there was that added financial stress...

Not to mention...

Yuuma would never outright say it, but Hiroto knew that his father was on his mind even more than usual during the Holiday season, a time that places so much emphasis on family. 

The thought made his chest tighten. Hiroto always swore to himself that he’d help Yuuma and his family to the best of his ability, and it went tenfold during this goddamn month. 

The two looked some more before coming up with a few more toys. There was a science kit for his younger brother, and some new race cars. And a babydoll and a slime-making box for his little sister. The two kids would share the Lego set, and their older brother would help them build it.

“Now we just need to swing by over there,” Yuuma told him, gesturing to the side of the store where mainly women’s products were. Things like fancy soap, candles, etc. 

It was definitely a gift for his mom.

“Sure.” They made their way over, Hiroto still pushing the cart. “Hey, Isogai...” The name slipped uncomfortably from his tongue, leaving a taste of unfamiliarity. 

“Yeah?” Yuuma asked, looking through some house decorations. Hiroto took a short breath.

“Your family will love and appreciate whatever you get for them. It’s always the thought that counts, and that’s like...times ten with you. You’re a really good son and big brother, and that alone means so much to them probably.”

There was a pause.

“So please don’t stress yourself out, looking “for the perfect gift,” Hiroto added quickly. “They love you so much...”

Well, so much for nice encouragement. He just blurted out everything.

The sound of gentle laughter rang out, and he glanced up to see Yuuma looking back at him. His best friend’s eyes crinkled in a charming way as he spoke.

“Thanks, Hiroto...I couldn’t have gone through all this without you.” He ran a hand through his mop of dark hair. “And I don’t just mean this past month...thanks for being my best friend.”

He continued. “It’s when you say stuff like that...that brings me back down to Earth,” Yuuma admitted. “And I can actually...relax, even for just a little bit.”

Oh...

Hiroto coughed lightly, before beaming at him. “Well, duh~what are best friends for?” He winked. “I’ve always got your back.”

“Same here,” Yuuma replied, his gaze soft. 

His phone buzzed and he pulled it out, brows furrowing slightly. “Ah, Yada texted.”

Yada: help megu almost fought some girl over a pair of tights on sale

Maehara: LMFAOOOOOO well did she win?

Yada: ya of course

Kataoka: - _ - she deserved it

Isogai: Haha

Kataoka: also sorry to interrupt but

Kataoka: where the hell are okano and kimura????

.................

_________

“I can’t believe you actually had a good idea for once,” Okano muttered, the blue light from the game reflected in her fierce gaze. “Coming to the mall arcade instead of doing some boring shopping.”

“Yeah, well, at least one of us used our brain cell today,” Kimura shot back, his thumbs moving rapidly. “If it was up to you, we’d still be circling around the penny fountain.”

Okano snorted. “Shut up.” She picked up the pace on the controllers, feeling a familiar drive to win piling up inside of her. 

Ten seconds later, “You lose!” was flashing at her on the screen while Kimura jumped up, throwing his arms up in victory. “Aw, hell yeah!”

“Fuck!” Okano hissed. “One more time!” She demanded, turning towards him.

Kimura smirked, calming down. “No thanks, I’m getting bored of this one now,” he replied nonchalantly.

Okano rolled her eyes. “Fine.” She looked around at the arcade interior, her gaze scanning around for anything that seemed interesting. 

“Oh! I love that game!” She exclaimed, gesturing to an iceball set up. “Come on!”

“Sure!” Kimura followed her towards the machine, seeing nothing else to do. “I bet I’ll win~” He sang smugly.

“You wish,” Okano scoffed, choosing the one on the left while he moved to the right. She inserted the proper number of tokens before smiling satisfied at the way the machine lit up. “I’m a beast at this game. Maehara can tell you himself how I literally destroyed everyone at this last summer.”

Kimura did the same and they both waited for the number of balls to roll down towards them. “Huh. We’ll see about that.”

“Just shut up and play already.” She had already thrown her first ball, smirking at how it fell into an 100 point slot. “Ha!”

“Lucky shot,” Kimura mumbled, tossing his first one. It fell into the Zero slot, much to his disappointment. “Shit...”

Thankfully, Okano didn’t pay attention. She was much too preoccupied with tossing her own balls, which all landed in the 100 or 250 slots. 

Kimura picked up the pace and continued his game. He groaned as all of them fell into the 10 point slots. The number of tickets coming out on his end was nothing compared to Okano’s long chain. Well...maybe my pitching is shit after all, like Sugino said. I should fix this...

“Done!” Okano shouted, throwing her last ball that fell into the 100 slot. She grinned at her list of tickets before looking over at him. “What’d I tell you, huh?” 

Kimura rolled his eyes, grabbing his final ball. Gritting his teeth, he tossed it with a carefull turn of his wrist. He watched in anticipation as the ball glided over all the slots...before falling right into the 5000 slot.

“Oh shit!”

“Woah!” Okano yelled, her eyes wide. “Oh my god, Kimura! You got the highest number!”

“I did!” He shouted back, somewhat in a daze. 

“That’s amazing!”

For a moment, it was like they weren’t rivals. Just a moment though.

Okano punched his shoulder, her lips curved. “Beginner’s luck,” she teased, but the fire never left her eyes.

Kimura laughed before his gaze fell back on his tickets. “Ah...it’s taking a while, isn’t it?”

Okano looked at it with a frown, pursing her lips. “It shouldn’t be.”

“Let’s give it another minute,” he suggested.

Five minutes later, Kimura felt like screaming. “My major accomplishment!” He sighed dramatically. “And no one was around to see it but you!”

Okano rolled her eyes, hopping off the floor where they’d been crouching. “Get up. Let’s go find a staff member.”

“Yeah...” Kimura stood up, shoving his hands into his hoodie pocket. “Uh hello? What are you staring at?” He questioned.

No answer, as Okano looked thoughtfully at the game machine. “Earth to Okano~” He sang, waving a hand in her face.

Then she did it.

Something he hadn’t expected, but really it shouldn’t have even surprised him.

Okano swung her leg out before letting it collide against the machine’s ticket base. A booming thud rang out.

And almost immediately, tickets began streaming out. 

Kimura’s jaw dropped.

“There, it’s all fixed,” Okano smiled with a shrug.

“Are you crazy?” The words escaped his mouth instantly. “You pulled out some assassin moves just to fix a ticket machine?!”

“Well yeah~You can get your tickets now!”

“How did you even know that would work?! And doesn’t your foot hurt like hell?”

Okano laughed. “Honestly, I had no idea if it would work. But it did!” She glanced at her foot. “And it doesn’t hurt. That part of the machine is pretty hollow, and my foot has hit harder things so...”

Kimura frowned at her.

“I promise it’s fine!” Okano held her hands up. “Woah...look at your tickets! I think you can get a stuffed animal with this number!”

“Yeah maybe-” Kimura was cut off by a stern voice barking at them.

“Hey! You kids!”

They both jolted up as one of the mall security guards stormed towards them, followed by as pissed-off arcade worker, who pointed at them. “Those kids broke the machine to steal extra tickets!”

Kimura felt his mouth go dry. Still he tried to shout, “Wait no! It’s a misunderstanding, I got 5000! But it got stuck-”

And then he was cut off by Okano yanking his arm away with a strength he could only imagine having. The next few seconds felt like a blur and before he knew it, the two of them were running in the lobby of the mall.

“Come on, you idiot! You’re the fastest runner in the class, act like it!” Okano yelled, purposely agitating him. Still, Kimura fell for it and his speed increased immensely in just a second. Now, Okano was trying to catch up to him. 

Kimura dashed through the numbers of people walking by, being mindful to dodge anyone, especially the elderly or some children... He shouted out a “Sorry!” and an “Excuse me!” as he moved.

It sounded odd but he could hear Okano’s footsteps behind him, even amongst the clusters of normal civilians. Probably from all the times they trained together. Her steps were light and bouncy, barely touching the floor as she kept a stable balance. He always thought to himself how Okano moved like she could walk on air.

He made a sharp turn around a mall corner, narrowly avoiding a collision with three girls just trying to walk by. “Ah, I’m so sorry!”

“What the hell- wait...Kimura?” One of the girls breathed.

Kimura’s head snapped up at the familiar tone and he realized in horror who the girls were. “Kataoka! Yada! Kurahashi!” He laughed sheepishly. “How’s your shopping going?”

“Fine~!” Kurahashi chirped, somehow balancing five huge bags on one of her arms alone.

Kimura smiled at her. “That’s good...” He laughed nervously again. “Well, I should continue on my way-”

Kataoka leveled him a sharp glare, leaning in closer. “What do you think you’re doing, running around the mall like a maniac? And where’s Hinata?!”

“Uhm...”

“There you are!” All four of them jolted, looking up to see the security guard. Standing right beside him was a very annoyed-looking Okano, crossing her arms. Ah, so she got caught...

“I’m gonna need you to come to our office,” the guard spoke sternly, looking straight at Kimura. 

He sighed, stepping forward to comply before passing a pleading glance to the girls. Kurahashi frowned, Yada sighed, and Kataoka shut her eyes irritably. Then she spoke. “Officer...we’re friends with them, so we’ll come along too, if that’s okay.”

“Alright then.”

The girls followed them warily and Kataoka leaned in to whisper to Yada. “I hope your negotiating skills will come in handy now...”

..............

________

“Oh man,” Maehara wheezed, clutching his stomach. “Banned from the mall for a month?!” He burst out laughing again.

“Yeah...” Kimura’s head was dropped into his arms, which rested on the table of the cafe they were at.

“I’m glad you find this act of immaturity so funny,” Kataoka commented dryly, taking another sip of her latte. The liquid scorched her throat a bit, but she needed the caffeine at that moment. 

“Actually, I find it hilarious,” Maehara corrected. “Seriously, how did all that even happen? Why’d you run away?”

“I’d like to know too,” Isogai chimed in tiredly.

“Uh, haven’t you heard of fleeing from the scene of a crime?” Okano snapped, but it lacked its usual bite as she reached over for her hot chocolate.

“That only works if you can’t get caught,” Yada pointed out with a giggle, adjusting her scarf.

“Aw man,” Maehara chuckled, toning it down at the sight of Okano’s pout. “It’s okay guys. We’ll laugh about this in the future.”

“You’re laughing about it now,” Kataoka muttered sourly.

Maehara ignored her. “One day, we’ll look back on this as a super fond memory,” he said confidently, throwing an arm around Kimura.

“Not to mention, it was pretty cool how you used your kick, Hina!” Kurahashi chimed in, hugging her.

“Yeah, pretty badass,” Isogai agreed, flashing her a smile.

Okano’s lips curved up. “Thanks, guys...”

“I guess the whole thing was pretty ridiculous,” Kimura said. “Sorry for stressing you out, Kataoka...”

She waved him off but her gaze softened. “Just don’t let this happen ever again.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Maehara clasped his heads behind his head. “Ah, by the way, I’m gonna have to leave sooner than I thought.”

Yada squinted at him. “...Why?”

“Well, there’s this Christmas event at another store where they need a guy in a Santa costume...and you know...the elves are all pretty girls, so I gotta help them out-”

All his friends let out a collective groan. 

[kangtaebins]

Weird Asks That Say A Lot

I said I was going to just answer all of these bc of boredom,, and so here I am

1. Coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? Teacups are aesthetically pleasing idc what anyone says

2. Chocolate bars or lollipops? Lollipops

3. Bubblegum or cotton candy? Cotton candy supremacy

4. How did your elementary school teachers describe you? I was told that I was a leader a lot, and was told that I was very intelligent. Ah yes, I suffered from gifted kid burn out in high school-

5. Do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? Look, plastic cups are the best. Specifically the ones with the lids and reusable straws

6. Pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? It truly depends on the day bc some days I would say goth and other days I’d say grunge, but most days- pastel

7. Earbuds or headphones? Earbuds

8. Movies or TV shows? TV shows bc- idk actually I’m just not a movie person

9. Favorite smell in the summer? I have a weird obsession with the smell of cheap sunscreen and I have no clue why

10. Game you were best at in p.e.? I hated gym in high school and rarely participated despite the teacher being irritated with me (truly she gave up after a few months bc I really did not care at all) HOWEVER- I went to town in volleyball and still enjoy playing volleyball v much

11. What do you have for breakfast on an average day? I don’t eat breakfast often,,, 

12. Name of your favorite playlist? Probably my Navy or Indigo playlist

13. Lanyard or key ring? Key ring 

14. Favorite non-chocolate candy? Anything green apple!!!

15. Favorite book you read as a school assignment? I actually genuinely enjoyed Romeo And Juliet tbh

16. Most comfortable position to sit in? I always curl up in a ball on the couch, but in a chair I manspread ngl

17. Most frequently worn pair of shoes? Nike slides <//3

18. Ideal weather? Between 50-70 degrees, sunny but not warm, being able to wear a hoodie and not be hot or cold

19. Sleeping position? I usually either sleep on my left side or on my stomach (my back once in a while when it’s hurting bc I’m a hag)

20. Preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? I write on my phone more than anything

21. Obsession from childhood? Hm- I was really obsessed with High School Musical as a kid. My friend and I would put it on and lip sync to the songs and pretend we were the characters

22. Role model? Is it- wrong to say myself? Bc I feel like that sounds arrogant but genuinely it’s bc I’m constantly trying to better myself mentally and learn and grow. Idk I just am proud of who I am and look to myself when I need to find motivation

23. Strange habits? Strange? Idk if it’s strange but I’m constantly twiddling with the hem of my sleeves bc I love the feeling of it

24. Favorite crystal? Citrine 

25. First song you remember hearing? WH- bitch idk tf

26. Favorite activity to do in warm weather? Stay tf inside in the air conditioning

27. Favorite activity to do in cold weather? Stay tf inside in the heat

28. Five songs to describe you? To describe me?? Girl idk I'm all over the place. How about songs that resonate with me instead,,, Alive by Khalid, Paranoid by Lauv, Phobia by Dvwn, Fake Smile by Ariana Grande, and Breathin by Ariana Grande

29. Best way to bond with you? Truly I'm not very difficult to get along with, just don't be an asshole. Talk to me about psychology, current events, say Soobin is the cutest to exist idk it's not that hard

30. Places that you find sacred? I- hm. I'm not like a church person or anything so idk. Maybe just anything really old or places with very detailed and unique architecture

31. What outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? I don't own many clothes,,, let alone nice clothes. I also don't really dress to impress I'd much rather be comfortable

32. Top five favorite vines? Oh god if I h a d to pick???? The lipstick in the Valentino bag, they were roommates, it's an avocado- thaaanks, jared 19, and uh,,, zach stooppp you're gonna get in trouble

33. Most used phrase in your phone? Tbh it's probably "girl what-" or "no bc"

34. Advertisements you have stuck in your head? That 877-CASH-NOW ONE JFC

35. Average time you fall asleep? Between 11pm-1am

36. What is the first meme you remember ever seeing? Probably the troll face one or smth

37. Suitcase or duffel bag? Suitcase

38. Lemonade or tea? I mix them together!

39. Lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? Lemon meringue pie bc I don't really like cake

40. Weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? Y'all I- went to a hs/college mixed school,, I've seen it all. Weirdest?? Idk but one weird thing I remember was when we were making whistles in art and some dude made a penis whistle 😭

41. Last person you texted? My best friend :))

42. Jacket pockets or pants pockets? Jacket pockets

43. Hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? Hoodie 100%

44. Favorite scent for soap? I love soaps that smell like soap. Like ok duh I know that sounds dumb but yk what I mean? I don't want lemon or mint or whatever, I like the plain soap smell

45. Which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? Fantasy

46. Most comfortable outfit to sleep in? Oversized t-shirt, no pants. I question anyone that is comfortable sleeping with pants on-

47. Favorite type of cheese? Feta!

48. If you were a fruit, what kind would you be? I feel like I'd be a pineapple and I have no clue why

49. What saying or quote do you live by? Not necessarily a quote but more of a thought: live for yourself, enjoy each day, do what gives you joy

50. What made you laugh the hardest you ever have? I have had so many instances in which I have laughed so hard I peed and to even attempt to name one is impossible

51. Current stresses? Making sure my family gets their vaccines and stays safe

52. Favorite font? I don't think I have one? Anything except comic sans

53. What is the current state of your hands? What does this even mean 💀 I mean,, they're holding my phone, cold, and my nails are unpolished

54. What did you learn from your first job? That people are assholes but I'm capable of not giving a fuck bc life is not that damn serious

55. Favorite fairy tale? Is The Three Little Pigs considered a fairy tale?

56. Favorite tradition? Putting up the Christmas tree with my mom :( it's always a lot of fun

57. The three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? Depression, grief, and hopefully one day- smth I'm currently dealing with

58. Four talents you’re proud of having? Makeup!! But also: singing, crying on command, and tying cherry stems with my tongue

59. If you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? Sick of these bitches

60. If you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? I don't watch anime so idk

61. Favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.? It's this line from Eleanor & Park: "Eleanor was right: She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn't supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something."

62. Seven characters you relate to? Holy hell, 7?? Probably won't get that many but hm,,, Darlene from Roseanne, Hermione from Harry Potter, Emily from Pretty Little Liars maybe?? Idk I suddenly blanked

63. Five songs that would play in your club? As if it's Your Last by BP, anything from SHINee, anything from Ariana, also anything Rihanna, just a bunch of women tbh

64. Favorite website from your childhood? FUCKING WEBKINZ BRO

65. Any permanent scars? I have a few on my arms idk where they came from tbh, I also have one on my hand from my sister 🧍🏻‍♀

66. Favorite flower(s)? Sunflowers!!! I also really love lilacs 💔

67. Good luck charms? My dog's collar that I wear as a bracelet

68. Worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? Licorice-

69. A fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? It takes repeating a piece of information 12 times at random to memorize it completely

70. Left or right handed? Right

71. Least favorite pattern? Fucking chevron- and realistic camo, and anything with the American flag

72. Worst subject? Yall im awful at history. American history, world history, all of it-

73. Favorite weird flavor combo? Either pickles and peanut butter or cheese and grapes

74. At what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? I'm stubborn but also always in pain so I've become numb to a lot of body pains. I have to be at like a 7-8 before I take smth otherwise I'd always be taking it

75. When did you lose your first tooth? I was probably like 5 I was definitely in Kindergarten

76. What’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? I fw baked potatoes

77. Best plant to grow on a windowsill? I have a love for succulents

78. Coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? Oh my- I don't drink coffee but coffee from a gas station

79. Which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo? Driver's license for sure

80. Earth tones or jewel tones? Jewel tones

81. Fireflies or lightning bugs? I say both,, but I think I say lightning bugs more

82. PC or console? PC

83. Writing or drawing? Both

84. Podcasts or talk radio? Podcasts definitely

84. Barbie or polly pocket? Barbie

85. Fairy tales or mythology? Fairy tales

86. Cookies or cupcakes? C o o k i e s

87. Your greatest fear? Losing people I love

88. Your greatest wish? To live comfortably and be a great mother

89. Who would you put before everyone else? My family

90. Luckiest mistake? Guessing on 90% of a test and getting an A 💀

91. Boxes or bags? Bags are easier to carry-

92. Lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? Fairy lights!!

93. Nicknames? Sam, Sammi, my sister calls me Sams, my best friend calls me Bub, and my gf calls me Baby if that counts- 👀

94. Favorite season? Fall omg it's gorgeous and has perfect temperatures

95. Favorite app on your phone? ✨tumblr✨

96. Desktop background? Its literally a pic of Soobin, Taehyun, and Beomgyu

97. How many phone numbers do you have memorized? Like 4-5

98. Favorite historical era? The one where white people learn their fucking place and stop being racist, homophobic, classist, sexist, all the -ists and -phobics,,,, so none. Fuck history :))

[dolphin-enthusiast]

ah, this day has been very long, hello there my dolcezza!! 💌🌠🌺 has the day treated you well? i hope it has!! things have been quite busy but i managed to get some rest time today, so i hope you did too!! ❤ so i saw that someone said i'm bruno in real life?? that made me laugh a lot!! i do wish to be like him,, considering he's one of my all-time favorite jojo characters!! (but you already know that hehe) the fact that you agree with that anon makes it even better 😂 (1/8?)

"oh and, i have something important to tell you dear,, of course i fell in love with your personality!! you may think that you're not so great and that your personality is flat and unappealing, but i wholeheartedly think otherwise!! something about your indifference and chaotic behaviors is very charming to me,, (2/8?)

frankly, i can see many different hidden layers,, your personality has much depth to it,, and you really are such a sweetheart to me, which i can't help but find appealing!! you truly are very entrancing in my eyes, and something tells me that you need to hear that more often 💞💞💞💞💞 i really do admire you caro!! (3/8?)

so most of my day was spent cooking, napping, and playing some video games (since i had some more free time!) my sister and i got to start playing eyes of heaven, and i won my first battle playing as jolyne with joot as a sidekick!! their interactions are so cute,, i love them so much!! 😊 (5/8?)

and i also played more ps4 minecraft today on a friend's world, we finally finished a huge build project, which was a giant renaissance style villa,, it took us only a week since i would play for a few hours a day (while he played up to 12 hours,, che pazzo!!) we were so happy when we finished that we started jumping up and down while on video call,, it was so funny 🌺✨ (6/9)

i also got to make some fresh marinara with my mom since our gardener neighbor brought some very large tomatoes!! we have this secret family recipe that comes from my bisnonna, so we made a pot full of it and stored it away,, i also got to help make some more pastries,, and my dad said that i should open up a restaurant hehehe,, i think it would be a nice side goal in the future but i have some big dreams to pursue first!! 🌠 (7/9)

i also slept lots today, i was very lethargic today for some reason... but we had this huge scary storms come through that really frightened my cats and i!! my twin told me i was being a baby about it, but i think he got karma when a huge bolt of lightning struck nearby,, i had to hide under my blankets and pillows the whole time 😖 (8/9)

oh well, at least i'm still alive!! it's very late, so i'll just end it here! make sure to keep taking care of yourself for me morgy darling, you are very important to me and the army!! 💗 - much much love from your sleepy fiancée, waifu anon xoxo 💖💘💕💓💗❤🌺🌼🌸🌻(9/10)

ps: 1) my friends are quite impatient about this wedding apparently!! ive been telling them that it's coming up and that they need to be patient,, but quinn started ranting to me about impatience, i'm gonna have to lecture her 😅 2) if you do ever need to hear something uplifting about yourself,, you can always count on me dear 💖💖💖💖 (10/10)"

Darling once again u amaze me....not only did one person ever said before to me that my indifference and overall behavior are charming and such...quite the contrary actually🤡🤡🤡 i still cant comprehend what is there thats absolutely charming to u but at the same time it does make me a little more happy knowing that somehow u like it😳😳😳✌️✌️✌️

On another note, i did acc hear from one of my american friends that there's alot of storming going on (we acc dont get such massive storms often and its kinda a shame since i love em) and heY i would have teased u a lil for hiding under the blankets too since thats lowkey cute but i wouldnt call u a baby, girl u wanted to join the military thats the opposite of a baby😩👊

Also u always helping out ur family with cooking and baking and saying that u have family recipes sounds surreal and hella magical jsudjsjs maybe yall b secretely some sort of sorcerer family and i believe it esp after i saw how enchanting u are dear👁️👀 and i was just gonna say i can so see u opening up a little pastry shop...even if its like a side business since ur gonna b a top vogue model after all🤭🤭 i bet ppl (me included) r gonna b standing in huge ass lines to buy handmade desserts carefully crafted by the one and only vogue waifu😤😤

Oh since u mentioned Quinn (im just gonna answer their ask here since its easier, they sent an ask sayin u been feeling lowkey wacky today??? Idk whats goin on but make sure to at least eat smth properly and dont stress so much dear...im awful w advice and comfort i know but still me and the clown army are a t u r s e r v i c e in case of anything ma'am👁️👁️

As for myself i just watched more of cowboy bebop (almost finished it a h a) and then ended up playing this cringe fail racing game until almost 1 am skhddhsh sELf cARe😩😩😩🤪🤪🤪🔥🔥

[szopenhauer]

Think of a movie and now give me that movie title: random Elvira: Mistress of the Dark 

Quote a line from that movie:

Name a song: random MARUV & Boosin — I Want You 

What’s a line from that song? Baby turn me, turn me on All night long What’s the last word spelled backwords of that line? GNOL XD Whats the relationship between you and the last person you texted? my fiancee What would your name be if you replaced T’s with S’s & A’s with E’s? Zuzenne Would you ever legally change you name to that? nah Your boyfriend/girlfriend say they can’t hang out & it’s been two weeks. You? ok How often do you think about death? all the time Where were you when you had your first sleepover? Your house or a friends’? friend’s - P.W.

Are you hungry?: thirsty

What did you buy last time you went to the store?: food? bread not food? trinkets - for example - two books and a tiny stuffed dog

Do you think stained glass windows are pretty?: I don’t know tbh

Are you a chocoholic?: not at all

Have you ever been carded when buying something? : not even when I was buying cigarettes

Do you have a favorite highlighter color?: yellow

Do you have a flashlight?: I do

Do you like watermelon?: nah

Has anyone ever walked in on you while you were on the toilet?: obvi, many times but usually just family members

Do you like a lot of ice in your drinks?: noooo

Have you ever painted a room?: bathroom Have you ever petted a donkey? from what I remember

Out of all 24 hours, which one is your favourite? hmm... Have you ever been in a lighthouse? nope

What time are you planning on going to bed tonight? no idea Have you ever been bit by an animal? yeah Did it rain today? kinda What was the name of the last dog you pet? it was my dog - Łasuch Do you find that you have a certain meal you eat every time you go to certain restaurants? sure Are you constantly judging people? could say so Have you ever had anything stolen from you? sorta Which would you rather, a snowy day, sunny day, rainy day or cloudy day?: cloudy or sunny maybe rainy but definitely not snowy How long have you ever spent away from home? month? Has your luggage ever been lost at the airport? Did you get it back? - About how many times during the night do you wake up from your sleep? few Are there any air fresheners in your house? What kinds? no What scent of candle do you burn the most? we don’t For what reason did you last cry? ugh... What kind of surveys do you wish there were more of? deep

Last time you were attacked by an animal? this summer? Are you paranoid all the time or just during the night? more often during the day actually  Have you ever dated someone without knowing their name? last name, not first, I was a stupid kid and was dating a guy online once and several boys at camp just to show off somebody likes me that way even tho I wasn’t really interested nor knew anything about those matters

If you go to an all-you-can-eat buffet, how much do you really eat? a tiny bit If you need to ask a question in class do you raise your hand? of course How many times have you been engaged (if any at all)? once, currently Do you have to see something to really believe it? jak niewierny Tomasz - często Have you ever gotten so dehydrated that you passed out? I’m surprised that I didn’t :x If your friend was being cheated on, would you tell them? absolutely Do you always assume the worst? that me indeed Are you sick and tired of life? sadly Have you ever been busted for under age drinking? I wasn’t drinking underage, I still don’t drink  Do you have a picture of you and your lover kissing? 1 and a tik tok Have you witnessed a fight at school? bunch

What is your favorite time of day to run? when I’m late for the bus lmfao

When was the last time you talked to your mom? recently Do your parents crush your dreams? sometimes Did you sleep in today? I didn’t Do you hate sleeping in? I love sleeping in  How late do you consider too late to sleep in? noon, 11am is already late  How long have you had a smartphone? less than 5 years Do you keep lists of names that you like? even tho I don’t want kids :P Have you ever butt-dialed someone? it happened

First letter of the names of everyone you have kissed, like *that*; M.

Do you like going to school sports games? eww, boring Have you ever worn your boyfriend’s clothes? guy from camp gave me his cap for a day Have you ever stolen your sibling’s clothes? I had to wear them when she was growing up, gross Have you ever loved someone and HATED it? later? Do you like Starbucks or would you rather just have water or something? just water lol Have you ever walked into a door before? po maturze zapomniałam, że woźny zamknął drzwi, które się same otwierały i walnęłam w nie, raz przytrzepałam sie w futrynę bo za szybko skręciłam w nocy do pokoju, mama uderzyła mnie drzwiami jak byłam mała i stałam za blisko wejścia dzwoniąc do domu więc spadłam ze schodów, a ojciec stuknął mnie tymi dworcowymi przy wiadukcie i wylałam na siebie sok - to chyba wszystkie przypadki Do you know anyone who’s like, psycho-religious? fanatic? my uncle is one of those Have you ever been stuck on a ski lift? luckily never been there to begin with Do you know who Nancy Sinatra is? ain’t this the gal who sings “those boots were made for walking” or smth like that? Have you ever bought anything from an airport? I wasn’t there so... If I asked you who you were gonna marry a year ago, you would say; omg Do you snore, talk, sleepwalk, or drool? drool at times, sorry also roll/kick around and fart ^^” When you woke up this morning, what was your first thought? I was wondering why Nat fronted If you could start completely over knowing what you do now, would you? possibly

If you drink coffee, do you have a favorite flavor & brand? If so, what? not applicable Have you ever personally known a pair of Conjoined twins? woah What is your first thought when you see people kissing in public? "get a room” Would you ever consider being a professional stunt-person? I have no abilities/skills/health etc for that kind of job and it’s really sad actors get prizes for stunt-ppl’s work

How about a Mailman? my father was and that ruined his body so I doubt it (Besides Hello kitty) Do you have a favorite Sanrio character? If so, Who? Hello Kitty is evil Do you flinch when strangers touch you? don’t touch me! Can you remember the first time you went to a movie theater? I believe Is there something in particular you like to look at photos of? What is it? I have strange interests... Do you actually like the taste of Diet Soda? didn’t try and don’t plan to What brand of toliet paper do you normally use? I don’t give a shit ;) Do the Charmin bears make you feel uncomfortable? xD fact that they’re red makes me uneasy On average, how many cans of soda would you say you drink daily? zero Did/do you ever stick your chewed -up gum under tables? I spat it on grass when I was younger and had stuck it in my hair years before as well but every other gum I trashed properly Can you remember the last thing you watched on the news that upset you? that’s why I avoid news How do you feel about red lipstick, is it whorish? it’s my fav but I no longer use makeup What is your definition of feminism? fighting for equal rights between women and men like pay in workplaces Are you comfortable in shorts? am not So, have you watched that Bob’s Burgers show? Do you like it? fragments 

Do you ever get the feeling you dont belong? always Do you believe actions speak louder than words? good actors will use both ways to lie

If your friend tried to commit suicide infront of you how would you react? how, why, who, when etc. Ever had a rumour spread about you? plenty Have you ever tried to impress someone before? majority of my life and I hate myself for that If someone jumped on your back what would you do? die? If you had a child and they turned out just like you would you be happy? poor kid... If you could choose the gender of your child what gender would you choose? not that I want kids but girl

Name three people you want to meet in Heaven. from those who died or are alive rn?

What could be the theme song of your life? I was taking a quiz today and they gave me Kero Kero Bonito - I'd Rather Sleep

Do you have any embarrassing health issues? :( Who do you wish you could talk to? grandma and/or brother Do you lose or misplace things a lot? very rarely lose, misplace more often but still usually same item like my scissors What was the name of the street you grew up on (if you don’t live there now) I live here! Does it still feel like summer where you live? it’s too cold for that Do you have a Paypal account? I wish Have you ever had a brand or company reach out to you on Instagram? polyvore What is the last thing you purchased from Etsy? I have no bank account to be able to buy stuff there Do you sell on Etsy? I’d like to someday Do you have a favorite aunt, and if so, who is it? aunt Alice Who is your favorite cousin? no one Have you bought next year’s calendar yet? yup What year did/will you turn 30? 2022 What’s a food that you like, but it makes you feel sick? no comment Do you like the name Addison? sounds like a shoe Is there anything that you regret getting rid of? ... Have you ever stood up to a bully? couple of times Do you own striped tights? nude and transparent Have you ever made your own Halloween costume out of clothes from ur closet? yep When was the last time you received a hug? this day Do you have anyone who hugs you regularly? dad? Would you rather have the bottom bunk or top bunk? bottom Window seat or aisle seat? window, aisle if in church  Have you ever thrown up on an airplane? that’s one of the reasons I won’t fly Have you ever seen anyone else throw up on an airplane? that’s another... Have you ever gotten sick in the car? almost Do you still wear clothes from the children’s section? whoops you got me What color is your watch? I need to buy watch for Nat... What color was the last pair of flip-flops you wore? last time I was wearing flip flops was before middle school and they were pink I suppose Were you born in your favorite season? in the worst! Have you eaten oatmeal lately? regularly... Do you enjoy editing photos? if not a snapchat filter selfie then I prefer them “natural” What is your favorite app on your phone? Choices forever! lately I begun playing The arcana and it’s pretty good, Lisa downloaded Addams family mystery mansion or smth but it’s not that cool and I used to play the detective story which was awesome <3  Do you answer your phone every time it rings? hell no Do you like to decoupage things? scrapbooks/collages are way better How many tabs are open on your browser right now? 9 with this one but I forgot to close the background music 

How many times have you had sex within the past two years? Guesstimate? personal How many times in a month do you go to the movies? How much do you spend? not at all

When was the last time you heard thunder? Where were you at anyway? this month? home When was the last time you were in trouble with your parents? If so. it’s complicated Do you know anyone who claims to have the ability to see the future? I have dreams that come true and my parents do, also my gf When you go to the movies, do you actually watch the movies or not? ... what else would I do in the cinema? oh, you mean kiss and such? waste of money Do you love or loathe the Eurovision? I don’t mind it Have you ever wielded a sword? wanna try :D If you were famous would you want a statue or a building names after you? what for Can you erect a tent? hope I didn’t forgot How tall is the tallest person you know? didn’t ask Have you ever ridden a camel? might try What’s your opinion on rats? cute

[transrightsjimin]

im sorry im not rly in the BE hype atm :((

rant coming which has nothing to do w the album but everything w stress nd fatigue nd crying nd more job stress nd sensory overload and me turning everything into a worse issue in my head etc etc

i was this morning when i saw the mv nd watched the vlive but i obv slept way too few bc i went to bed late nd woke up early for the live and i had to rush a lot w errands nd an appointment w my autism coach nd at said appointment we called a dude from the municipality to inquire abt jobcoaches nd it turned out we misunderstood what jobcoaches are as they are who u get referred to when u have a job, nd the guy found it hard to figure out what type of trajectory(?) would best fit me for help nd now i have time to think abt it and will speak him again in 2 weeks or sooner if i want to. im just so tired nd a bit hungry and on edge and one sec, im in the side of the house tht faces kids playing around aka screeching as if theyre dying every second nd its majking me only more on edge!!!!

but urgh i cried so bad during the appointment and was prob way too rudde to her before the appointment, bc she talks loudly nd sounds rude nd confronting but just naturally bc ofher tone nd language nd urghgh h thikning abt jobs nd trying to talk nd not cry too hard when trying to explain stuff to the man over the phone was rly hard, like obv its fine if he knows im crying but its just hard to talk when crying nd im just so devastated thinking abt jobs!! i dont know what type of job i could handle nd it feels like im making everythig up bc i did somehow finish two studies in uni and im privileged enough w education and whiteness tobe more easily selected for a job by e.g. last name on my cv and i shouldnt be this picky but god i cant handle smth as physically demanding and underpaid as this, im tired 4/7 days that im not working nd what i earn in those 3 days is still not enough to cover rent bc they pay only for the delivery time itself instead of more hours!!! it just feels like wtf am i doing bc the municipality guy did admit im not the usual person he works w bc i had an education, as if i dont belong in the group but its really just an issue of having -100 confidence and no job experience!! like i rly dont strive for a fancy job or ‘’’career’’’, i just bneed something that i can pay my monthly expenses w and have a bit left to save up for e.g. emergencies, additional medical bills (like the 350 euros from the adhd diagnosis and therapy, which my autism coach will contact my adhd therapist abt, like if that bill can be delayed or split up in a payment plan), paying back for loan debt eventually and MAYBE soon god forbid i save up for smth fun. and i “need” the job also to have a daily activity and some structure in my life bc a large part of the reason my schedule is so fucked up is bc i have no more set time tht i need to be anywhere or any strictness or reason to get up nd so i just dont ghhh

im always looking for reasons why i cant do smth and why smth would go wrong and im already looking at every area where getting help w getting a job can go wrong like e.g. me being too stubborn abt companies i dont agree w or me thinking i cant do anything just bc i have not much working experience outside of mail delivery :(

nd then there was this A B C task list system my adhd therapist proposed in wihc i keep track of my most to least urgent + important tasks every day nd we werent sure where to keep track of that kind of list and she suggested sticking a paper to a wall (i think id rather use my wardrobe) to write it on and change or replace that every day and it sounds like a hassle but i rly need to do it every day, nd i can try other methods but thatd be either writing it on my phone but im not always on there nd theres not a type of file i can make that doesnt move back chronologically as i make new notes

ALSO im just very frustrated w myself bc my mom wanted to come over w food and i know she was too sudden w it but if only i left on time for the stores it wouldnt have been an issue. i feel like shes rly sad she couldnt come visit. fucking hell i rushed so much back and forth from the stores that i forgot to put the leftover letters from work yesterday into the outdoor mailbox and i already stress abt this bc my current teamcoach (aka manager) is more stricter w this stuff nd recently asked for a statement / explanation by me on why there were 29 letters w/o sticker from a route i did  counted from the collected mail that were in outdoor mailboxes, and i did not do that but my only alibi / reason for not making that huge mistake was that i hadnt posted any mail yet that day and obv he wasnt happy w that. i sometimes had dreams / nightmares recently where i was late again or fucked up w a new route and got fired for it and thats quite an awful scenario / fear to me bc thats exactly why my dad was fired by his previous employee, for being late too often nd we’re the exact same. it just sucks bc i know many ppl who worry abt being late arrive to early at shit bc lol anxiety but i still arrive late every day WHILE being stressed abt it nd my whole fucking issue is that i need to break w bad patterns MYSELF, like whether i get help for autism stuff or adhd or sleep or whatnot, the homework / assignments / tasks / advice they give me, in the end i still need to be the one to do it and push through and make a change or put more effort into not going continuously back to the same distractions or demotivating black-white thinking

just URGH im so easily annoyed nd sensitive, also as in sensitive on a tactile level nd it doesnt help tht my room is a mess nd im super stinky from bts BE excitement and from squeezing my skin a lot last night, nor does the fact that i have rly bad coordination / awareness of my surroundings nd continuously bumping into shit or getting caught on smth help, which is also another reason im just so slow at work bc if i try to walk or deliver mail faster i keep end up bruising nd tripping or tear my hands on all these hard to move or sharp mail box slots if im not careful nd slower, which does still happen but not as bad when im careful

im also rly dizzy rn from haing slept too few and just urgh i “need“ a stupid fucking job, i need the money i need the structure but my god does actual labour and having to deal w colleagues every day and trying to keep up w stuff and be fast and precise enough in whatever the job is, sound horrifying hhhgghgh

OK RANT OVER IM SICK OF ME TALKING SO MUCH

[nathanrnackinnon]

a-z tag game

i was tagged by @benjchilwell thanks bb lov u

A: age - 19

B: birthplace - vancouver bc

C: current time - 14:49

D: drink you last had - vita lemon tea....a gift from the gods

E: easiest person to talk to - @jamesrodriguezs (ur tagged for this challenge binch)

F: favourite song(s) currently - this albanian song kat showed me called mike

G: grossest memory - honestly idek i think ive had too many 

H: horror yes or no - NO i am a PUSSY

I: in love - no thank u

J: jealous of people - duh

K: kids - the miracle of childbirth is more of a catastrphoe

L: love at first sight or walk by again - walk by again !!!

M: middle name - alkdfjdskf its my chinese name its so ugli i’ll spare u the details

N: number of siblings - none i wouldve killed them by accident or smth anyway salkjdfasdf

O: one wish - hhhhh infinite wishes...... or ! i get to go on constant vacations and never have to deal w uni again

P: person you last called - my mom when i needed her to saw me out of a skirt while we were thrifting aslkdfjd

Q: question you always get asked - are u korean (im not)

R: random fact about you - i was stuck in a skirt at a thrift store yesterday and i had to get my mom to knife me out of it

S: song you last sang - i would never willingly let anyone hear the ugliness of my voice to spare them but i think i sang to X by nicky jam and some other spanish song that i knew all the words to ????? at the club aklsjdf i am so sry

T: time you woke up - 12 pm

U: underwear colour - black im a goth

V: vacation destination - anywhere not in canada pls i am tired of this place i want the SUN

W: worst habit - procrastination

X: x-ray - like the dentist ones?? i guess? also one time when i was a kid i made a scene in hong kong about my foot and the entire street was wathcing me cry so they had to call the ambulance and when they took the xray at the hospital nothing was wrong i was just a dumb kid

Y: your favourite food - rice...i guess

Z: zodiac sign - TAURUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

people i’m tagging: @davidalabafc @ericdiers @fergrizi @lsane19 @stxnesy @flyingnacho

[chanzicoup]

A/N: I got this template from tenseoyong and I could not find the original creator to give proper credit to. I was waiting for someone to FINALLY request this for V. Like he's the most fatherly (?) of them all in my opinion!!! And he's all in for having 3-5 kids so don't even fight me there.

A = Announcement.- How do you tell him and the world that you’re expecting?

You didn't know you were pregnant until you were about four months in. It was rare but it happened for you two and you had felt no symptoms the entire time. He'd be so pumped for the arrival of twins but he's lowkey stressing because he feels like he has less time to prepare and that he "lost four months."

B = Books.- Did he read the books?

He doesn't read the books and he never will. He's more like a 'wing it' person so he'll go with the flow of things. Somehow he knows everything about the process of birth??? Did he study this before or something bc he really knows his stuff?!?!

C = Cuddles.- Who cuddles the baby more?

He definitely would. He's just so happy to finally have a little version of him and you running around. Whenever he holds the baby he daydreams about things they'll do together. Until he gets soft when it's time for them to go to school for the first time, leave for college, get married and oml take the baby away from him he's crying and smiling at the same time.

D = Daddy.- His reaction to being called Daddy and it setting in.)

You know that gummy smile? Exactly his face when he's called 'daddy' for the first time and it's not in bed ;)))

E = Empty.- Who goes to the store when you guys run out of supplies?

He would volunteer to babysit while you go out but when you come home with your arms full of bags he'd scold you for not letting him help. He didn't know you all needed that much and if he had known he would've went along to make it easier for you.

F = Feeding time- Who does feeding time?

He's all for it. Pretending the food is an airplane and the baby's mouth is the airport. Little plane noises and loud cheers when the baby eats well. All him.

G = Grumpy baby. - Who is better at dealing with a grumpy baby?

There are just some times a grumpy baby can't be calmed so you two go back and fourth to try and but your baby back to sleep while the other is doing something productive like cleaning, laundry, sleepinggggg.

H = How?- how many kids does he want?

"3 if we don't have time but 5 if we do have time" my ass. V wants at least five but that's probably not going to stop him from having more.

J = Jokes.- best dad joke?

Probably stole it from Jin but its, "What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee fish!!!"

K = Kisses.- His favorite place to kiss the baby.

He kisses their hands while they are laying on their back and he's just tickling their stomach and they giggle so loud; it's just really cute how v and his children are so close.

L = Little.- How he feels when he holds the baby for the first time.

Literally his world freezes and all he can focus on is his first born in his arms; how they instantly stopped crying when the doctor put them in his arms, how tiny they really are, their hair, eyes, nose, mouth, their teeny tiny fingers and toes. He soaks it all in and he'll never forget how the baby looked. Not even when he is old and frail.

M = Mommy.- what does he call you?

V would definitely call you "momma" along with the baby but he'll bump up the couple pet name game a lot bc he falls in love with you more nd more everyday and the kids are absolutely disgusted by how much skinship you two do. Like V is always hugging you from behind and kissing your cheek and he'll kiss your lips when the kids groan how gross it is when he kisses your forehead. A smirk on his face.

N = Nappies.- who deals with the really bad diapers?

It's all a team effort. He'd act like a doctor in surgery, even pulling out a face mask if it was that bad. You'd hand him the diaper, wipes, etc. when he asked for one; like an assistant would. Lowkey it's just really funny watching you two do childcare because it's always fun for you guys and you make a game out of it.

O = Onesies- Who likes to dress the baby in ridiculous outfits?

He will make sure his kid is fly as hell, but you draw the line at a gucci belt. Why would a baby need a belt???

P = Pet names- names he calls the baby.

"Chubs" bc of their chubby baby cheeks that grandma's love to pinch. Each kid gets a new nickname, one that relates to their personality, traits, etc.

Q = Questions.- How many questions does he ask the nurse?

He wouldn't ask the nurse anything, the only questions he have he'll ask his own mom. She did such a good job raising him and his siblings why would it be different for his own child?

R = Rely- what is the biggest thing you rely on each other for?

(This one is always so hard for me to write for idk why but it is) Ok so I guess you both would want the other to side with you on how to raise your child? Let me explain a bit. Let's say you tell the kid 'no' about something but then the kid goes to v and he says 'yes' to whatever it is. You two want to be on the same page as the other and want proper communication through out the entire family.

S = Sleep duty. - who gets up when it’s really late at night?

Teamwork makes the dream work. You both would take turns but if for some reason one of you is sleeping through the baby's cry the one that is awake will so it. Let's be real one of you will wake the other up and plea that they do it.

T = Trepidation.- fears as a new parent.

He'd be really nervous about saying the wrong thing here and there and scaring the child in some way. He'd be looking at the big picture about everything, how his actions now could affect his child's future. He really just worries his child will be unhappy because of him.

U = Ultra sounds.- His reactions to the ultrasounds.

He points out the baby before the nurse does and she's just like "Okay no one ever sees the baby first bc it's difficult to see but I guess this dad has some super powers or smth" and he marvels at the photos for weeks, printing extra out just to give them to his managers, the other members, his family. And if it's around the holidays, the baby's first picture is being printed on to Christmas cards.

V = Values.- what is the most important value he wants to teach your child.

One of the many things he hopes his children take from him is that he doesn't want them to have to depend on anyone for anything when they grow up. He wants them to have their own backs and to be able to take proper care for themselves for when he is gone and can't do it for them.

W = Water.- Who gives the babe the baths?

Man V is in the bath with the babe in a pair of swimming shorts and washing his and the baby's hair simultaneously. He has no other time to shower since he's busy being a dad and a celebrity at the same time.

X = X-mas- what do you guys plan for the holidays?

It would really depend on how old your baby is or if you were still pregnant. If you were still preggers he'd prefer to stay at home, just in case the baby wants out. But if the baby was a newborn he'd also prefer staying at home, his first Christmas with his new family would be special to him. but if the baby was more like a toddler he'd go and visit your and his parents, letting his son or daughter run around with their cousins whom they only met for the first time that same day. Either way he wants to get professional pictures done and they are hella cheesy at that.

Y = Yelling.- How many fights do the two of you get in?

It's not like loud arguing fights but when you guys are mad at each other you guys only talk when you have to. It sucks for V bc he values communication but when the baby is there he doesn't want to argue in front of them. If the fight started in the beginning of the day most likely it'll end at night when the baby is asleep and you guys are talking quietly in bed, trying to figure out the source of the problem. He hates going to bed angry so it will get resolved or else he is not sleeping a wink that night.

Z = Zoo- How crazy is the house after the birth?

It's just a mess. Somehow there is baby food on the ceiling. Dried wipes are everywhere. Toys all on the floor. It gets even worse when the baby learns how to walk.

~Blake

[henclair]

i had to write a short story following the hero’s journey so here’s a story about a girl venus and her quest for some iron supplements (it’s better than it sounds i swear)

Venus scowled, her patch covered boots thudding down the hallway as she stomped her way to the classroom. Late again, as if she would expect anything else. As if anyone else would expect anything else from her.

Her backpack was falling off her shoulder and she winced as the water bottle in her backpack’s outside pocket fell out, a loud clang ringing out through the empty hallway. She kicked it out of the way and watched in disinterest as it hit the row of metal lockers, another loud noise breaking through the silence of the hallway.

She left it there, it was empty anyways. Why did she even bring it.

The teacher for her first period nodded at her as she entered the classroom, slumping down in her seat and pulling out the assigned reading book. She had already read this one, but no one had believed her when she said that, so she followed along with the recording, each word leaving a bitter taste in her mouth.

Her next three classes flew by, and Venus was glad for it. Bossy, conceited teachers, ungrateful about the work she did and angry about the work she didn’t do. Lunch was the only respite from it, the only time she could be herself and not have it be a crime.

Carl was eating an apple quietly, his glasses hanging low on his nose as she slumped down onto the asphalt outside of the portables, he nodded at her and she rolled her eyes fondly in greeting. She pulled the hood of her thick jacket over her head, the fuzzy lining dipping low and obscuring her vision as her other two friends walked over.

“As if she would really say that, I know her better and she doesn’t even talk to me!” Tamar huffed, plopping down next to Venus and eyeing Shira with an annoyed look.

“Oh come on, she’s like a textbook popular girl, of course she would say that! Plus I heard it from Jenna so it’s bound to be true.” Shira shot back, opening up her bag and pulling out a meal for herself and a seperate one which she placed in front of Venus.

“Thank’s ‘ra, you’re a lifesaver.” Shira smiled at Venus’s words and went back to her ribbing with Tamar. Venus never had time, or the food, to make herself a lunch, but her friend’s were more than happy to provide her with seemingly bottomless food and snacks.

“Meds.” Carl reminded her. Venus stuck her tongue out at him and reached into her pocket, pulling out an empty orange bottle. No rattle, she thought, no rattle meant no pills. She winced and held it up to her friends, who frowned.

“You’re out?” Tamar asked sadly, “Again?” Venus nodded, her face morphing into a cranky expression as she ripped open the bag holding the gifted food. Stuffing her face distracted her from her friend’s gazes on her.

“No more iron for me I guess.” She said sarcastically, waiting expectantly for a laugh that never came. She was pointedly ignoring the sad looks on her friend’s faces.

“You know,” Shira started quietly, “you should really get more. You could like, die without them right?” Her tone was nervous, her painted nails clicking on the metal of the table’s legs. Venus scowled.

“Yeah, yeah.” Venus sighed out. “They keep up my iron levels, not that important right? I mean all that happens without them is that I faint and shit, not too bad. Been dealing with it my entire life and I’m fine, right?”

“It sounds like you’re trying to convince yourself of that.” Carl snorted, putting the apple core down on his napkin and looking pointedly at Venus. Venus shot him a cold look, but he was right.

“Ok look guys, I can’t afford the pills. My family can’t afford them, not with dad out of work and mom doing commissions. It’s just another thing I’m going to have to live without.” She shrugged and went back to eating, feeling her friend’s eyes watching her carefully.

“What if you just,” Shira pause, pursing her lips speculatively, “stole them?”

Tamar gaped, eyebrows going up into her hair. “Stole them?”

“Yeah!” Shira said, looking a bit flushed. “Venus needs them right? We could help her!” Tamar shook her head and laughed, as Venus pondered the suggestion from her short friend.

“Who are you? This is definitely not Shira guys, she’s not herself today.” Shira snorted at Tamar’s words and looked to Venus for the girl’s opinions.

“Actually, that could work ‘ra.” Venus said, a little more uplifted, even with the prospect of having to steal what she needed. “But I would need your guys’s help.” She looked to her friends and the three nodded.

“Excellent.” A smirk worked it’s way onto her face.

After school Venus felt exposed as she loitered in front of the parking lot to the CVS. Shira and Tamar had gone home together, typical, so they would be here soon but Carl had band practice so he wasn’t going to show. A tendril of guilt was squeezing her heart as she stood and waited, watching a young girl her age with a name tag on enter the parking lot, presumably to go work as a cashier.

Her mind swirled with thoughts that were abruptly cut off as Venus spotted her two female friends across the street, holding hands as they crossed the street.

“Hey girls, you ready to make ourselves a criminal record?” She joked, Tamar rolling her eyes and dropping Shira’s hand as the three began a slow trek through the parking lot, making small talk and trying to arise as little suspicion as possible.

Venus’s rational mind knew that three girls going into a CVS wouldn’t be too suspicious but the little anxieties and guilty thoughts continued to plague her mind.

Shira and Tamar smiled at the cashier as they went in, and Venus recognized the girl as the one she had seen entering the parking lot while she was lost in her thoughts. The girl looked to be about their age, with a kind smile and long hair held up in a ponytail holder, making swishing noises as she moved her head back from smiling at Venus to talk to the customer in front of her.

Venus felt even guiltier when she realized that she would be stealing from the pretty girl at the counter.

But she ignored the thoughts and quickly followed her two friends down the chips isle, where they would have the most cover to quietly talk out what they would do. She wondered why they didn’t do this outside, where it would be much easier to conceal their intention.

“So do you know where they are?” Shira asked quietly. Venus nodded, pointing up at the large sign hanging over the next aisle that read ‘Medications.’

“We’re lucky I have the pills that can be bought generically, I don’t really wanna break into the medical counter.” She said, looking down the aisle at the cashier, who eyed the three girls quickly.

“Yeah that’d be significantly harder.” Tamar snickered.

“We should move, we look suspicious.” Venus hissed, her two friends looking at her in concern. The three girls quickly moved to the next aisle and began to peruse, spreading out to cover more ground. Venus knew where the pills were so she pulled out her phone and sent a quick text to her friends.

‘Leave the store, I can do it myself.’ She sent, watching as the two other girls checked their phones and stared at her in confusion. ‘Plus we look like we’re waiting for smth, it’s kind of suspicious.’ Tamar began leaving the store and Shira looked nervously between her two friends. ‘I can do it. Don’t worry. Just wait for me out there!’

Shira finally with a last look back at Venus quickly exited the CVS, the bell dinging above the door as she left. Venus took in a deep breath and walked to the pills she needed.

The bright orange bottle stood out on the shelf of dull gray bottles and Venus cringed at the thought of how noticeable it would be. She looked up, doing a quick search for the security cameras. Her heart pounded with the thought of getting caught, her family couldn’t afford these pills she didn’t think they could afford to bail her out of jail.

Angling herself as not to be seen by the one camera nearby she quickly squatted down. Venus reached out and snatched one of the bottles, pulling her hand holding the pills into her sleeve. She stood up and looked around, catching no one’s eyes and nervously staring at the security cam for a good few seconds.

She began walking down the end of the aisle, putting her hands in her pockets and dropping the bottle in. Venus let out a deep breath, now all she had to do was get out of the store and she’d be home free.

She took the long way around, weaving through aisles of chips, makeup and hygiene products, avoiding eye contact with the few others she bumped into and walked past on her way to get out of the store. An old lady working at the counter in the back of the store smiled at her and Venus guiltily smiled back, feeling exposed, as if the woman would know she was stealing just by a glance.

When she was nearing the door she felt her heart pound a little faster with exhilaration, she was walking faster now, her boots clunking on the tiles of the floor. She neared the exit and spotted her two friends out the doors, both anxiously waiting and chatting quietly.

Venus walked out of the doors and let out a breath in relief.

Right as she left the doorway a bony figure knocked into her, and Venus fell to the concrete. Shira and Tamar gasped loudly, both freezing and looking at the person who had knocked her over. Venus looked up in surprise, recognizing the girl who had bowled her over as the cashier she had seen entering the store.

The girl was blushing as she started stuttering out an apology. “Oh god, I’m so so sorry, that’s the last time I check my phone while walking.” She reached out a hand to help Venus up.

“No, no I wasn’t paying attention either it’s okay.” Venus took the girl’s hand tentatively, letting herself be pulled up by the cashier. The two shared a smile.

As she moved back to standing the small orange bottle full of pills rolled out of her pocket and onto the concrete. Shira cringed and Tamar’s eyes widened, the girls watching in horror as the cashier’s eyes moved down to the bottle rolling slowly on the concrete. She squinted and looked between Venus and the bottle a few times before speaking.

“Did you?” She let the unsaid question hang for a second before Venus panicked.

“Run!” Venus screeched to her friends, watching the cashier’s eyes widen as the three girls took off running. She sprinted away, Shira and Tamar close behind, both looked a little worried and a lot tired as they rounded the corner and continued to run down the block away from the cashier, and the pills.

The next morning Venus showed up super late for school, having slept until it was almost time for lunch. Her mind was a mess, full of guilty thoughts, regretful thoughts, and even a few smitten thoughts.

However, her thoughts were mostly consumed with hunger as she trudged to the table her worried friends were sitting at. The three perked up as they saw her coming over, conversation always seemed to flow better with her there.

“Ah, the guilty party finally arrives.” Carl said sarcastically, tossing her an apple. Venus snickered and caught the fruit, nodding at him thankfully. He smiled at her and rolled his eyes.

“Thanks Carl, and I’m not guilty if I don’t get caught.” She grinned at him and took a bite of her makeshift lunch.

“But didn’t we get caught?” Tamar asked nervously. “Like, shouldn’t we do something about that? Are we going to get in trouble?” Venus bit her lip, Tamar had said her exact worries out loud when she didn’t want to think about them too much.

“I think we’ll be fine.” Shira shrugged, still looking a little apprehensive. “As long as we don’t go back I think we’ll be fine.” Tamar looked a bit soothed by that and Carl shrugged, not caring since he didn’t do anything. Venus frowned, but that gave her an idea.

An idea that would definitely up her chances of getting in trouble.

After school, she didn’t walk towards her house down the hill, she quickly left her friends and walked up the hill instead, towards the CVS. Her mind was whirring again, half thought out scripts for what she would say to the cashier if she even was there floating through the midst of her feelings.

Venus spotted the cashier from yesterday entering the store, her shift just starting. Venus hesitated as she neared the door, standing stock still by the doorway, her hand just on the handle of the door but not pulling yet. She took a deep breath and pulled it open, letting her legs walk her into the chilled interior of the drugstore.

She watched as the pretty cashier looked up from the crossword she was doing and her eyes widened in surprise. The girl’s eyebrows furrowed and she opened her mouth to speak but Venus quickly strode up to the counter and cut her off.

“I’m sorry.” Venus blurted out. The cashier frowned and motioned for her to lower her voice.

“For stealing?” The girl asked. “I’m glad, because you’re lucky I didn’t report what happened. I mean technically you didn’t succeed so I don’t have any proof or anything but still.” She blushed as she rambled and Venus was taken aback a little back, she hadn’t expected this. She’d expected the cops or complete help with stealing the pills again.

“What about the cameras?” Venus asked dumbly, and the cashier chuckled. A pretty, tinny sound.

“Those don’t really work unless someone’s always monitoring them and it was just a bottle of pills, no one would really make that big of a fuss.” The girl said smiling, looking at Venus with a slightly apprehensive but almost wholly sweet look.

“Huh.” Venus said, blanking on what to say next until the girl prompted her.

“So,” She started awkwardly, “is there something you wanted? Besides to say sorry I mean.” Venus nodded at the girls words, remembering the second part of her haphazard plan.

“Yes! Are you guys hiring?” She asked a little nervously. The girl looked a bit confused but then made an ‘oh’ as realization hit her. The girl reached under the table and grabbed a set of papers and pushed them across the counter to Venus.

“Actually, yes we are.” The girl winked and handed a Venus a pen. Venus beamed at her and began to fill out the form, the cashier watching her do so with her own smile.

When she walked out of the chilly store later that afternoon her pockets were still missing the pills she had gone in there for the other day, but this time there were two papers. A form for her parents to sign, the last part in the process of applying to work at the small CVS, and a paper with a phone number on it.

She smiled to herself as she walked down the hill towards her home, following the cars with her eyes and taking her time.

[aitian]

Sun 2/28 3:06am

watched a lot of crime shows lately. good girls, ginny & georgia, those kinds of crimes that happen in nice places, done by nice ppl. or like, suburban dystopia & rats on the countertops. 

up late last night watching tv- been really good & sleeping early for the last two weeks, waking up early too. but i woke up around 1pm today with plans to go do something, anything, with mom, hang out somewhere or smth. last weekend we went to altoona with dad too, & walked around the mall & ate kfc in the car before driving back. mom got a call from alice & sat on my bed with me, & we talked abt her residency match stuff & whatever. idk i think i was saying smth silly, maybe abt altoona last week, & felt like we were abt to end the call, & mom said she needed to tell us smth important. & she told us that grandma passed away last week, on wednesday. she died in the morning, & it snowed for the first time in a while that day in luoyang. its a good sign, peaceful passing. i started crying, & i heard moms voice start to break, & on the phone alice’s face begin to turn red. just like tears leaking out of my eyes, i didnt even feel the squeezing or any of the feelings in my head before i began crying. i guess its just one of those things that happens on its own. in my head i was thinking abt how i didnt think i would cry at this news, or actually thats wrong, of course i would. maybe it was just unexpected how easy & tender my body was to those words, & smth slow moving so far away, its aftermath, & the quietness of the ceremony i have never been a part of & always been a part of. i didnt know grandma well. i have a vague memory of being kind of mean and childish during the longest time we were together, around 2007 or 2008. and again, feeling so lost in 2018 seeing her and grandpa so old, feeling their days go by with difficulty. it always felt like the numbness of separation would shield me from tears like these. sociopath immigrant kids with no past, no access or interest in those things that hold us down. relieved thats not me. im not stupid enough to think that theres some sort of genealogical magic or fetish teaching that will set me free. its all here though, with nuance, in the moments that im living. that feels big, & free, & scary too. im thinking abt the clouds moving through the sky today. rly existential sometimes these days, sudden panic & the like, mostly thinking abt mom not being here someday. that hurts so bad. 

after the call we hugged, & i cried more, & mom talked about how those great people, the greats, wei da de ren, were by her side. & things about how those days when it was the six of them, mom, two uncles, grandma, grandpa, & great grandma, all living in one house, she always felt, even at the time, that those were the happiest days of her life. it means a lot for a small family to be under one roof. (& earlier on the call, it means a lot for a person to take care of themself. i felt sad, or almost a bit irritated when mom said that on the call, that its a lesson we should learn from grandma that its important to take care of ourselves, as if there is a moral to smth like this, or smth so simple to gain, & i know its bc she wanted to be someone who could say that to her kids in a moment like this, & she feels the same way as i do, & even more, abt the vastness of this moment.) when mom told dad on thursday he cried, & then said some stupid shit abt how they shouldnt have stayed. she didnt tell alice on the phone but she told me. when would dad ever offer a comforting word? he has been so shitty & annoying these past few days, bickering & teasing & doing things to make mom angry like any other time. we also talked abt some stupid stuff like how xiao yu ah yi made yuan xiao in jiu niang, some meat & some black sesame all together, with diced carrot & corn in the soup that mom & dad tried to eat for breakfast. we ended up leaving the house around 3 after eating some breakfast. 

mom drove to the golf course by waffle shop, & we got out of the car on that path that leads to the IST bridge. talked abt how golf is so dumb & we just wanted to walk on their field. went a little down the path until it met the road, & walked down the road for a bit. mom said she didnt want to retrace our steps so i said we could just take a circle and walk on the grass. there was still a lot of snow, around 4 inches where it was deep but the tops of the hills were bare. took some photos. mom smiled really natural & pretty, like i dont see her doing well when posing, & she thought so too. we ran a little bit, & stopped after we got to the top of a hill. i was looking at the sky, really blue & sunny & mostly filled with white clouds, blowing by. they were moving fast & steady, like that memory i have of feeling them go by. so wonderful. i felt the ground beneath my feet in that moment, like an animal standing on a hill, born from thos big breathing thing, moving as a small & big part of it, it moving as a vast part of me, above & below me. it means so much that these moments we spend together .  just that. we made our way back to the car & decided to go to home goods. we poked around & looked at stuff, & by the time we got to the furniture half of the store i felt kinda tired so we found an ottoman to sit on. & we were talking abt the texture of the fabrics on the chairs & stuff, & decided to just go to loves (where wolfs furniture went out of business, advertising a total liquidation sale recently) & look at sofas. im laying on it right now. we sat on everything downstairs, then sat on stuff upstairs. & we sat on the one before this & mom was like, this could be the one, & i said we shoould keep looking, & mom sat on this one, & mom said this is the one. & she called a sales associate over & he asked what her question was, & she said she didnt really have one. she wanted to buy this sofa. also, whats the final price? the tag said smth like 2000 as the discounted price, & the guy said 1400. & mom said we/ll take it, & we did. mom got shoe covers from amys mom for when the movers came, & we moved the old sofa out of the way into the guest room (dad took the door off & we tilted in every direction). then i played some genshin co-op with sherry in my room & we called & chatted abt stuff while the moving happened. it got quiet after moving & my phone ran out of battery & i went downstairs & we ate hot pot. new couch. life. i think im going to sleep here tonight. it smells like new couch, & i think i liked this smell on our old couch but it just smells kinda smelly to me now. feels like when we travel, or moved houses, or something like that. the feeling that life is changing a lot, or we are making changes, moving about, being changed, becoming changed.

[sundrenched-smilez]

odd numbers for the lesbian asks! (if it's too many just do every 4th one maybe?)

1. Femme or butch? 

for type, im vry easily wooed by butches tbh

as for myself, im genderfluid + heavily lean towards butch-ish for one gender + have been gettin more comf w that term for myself. the 3 genders i switch between, ive described as sharp, dainty and tired, for reason of not really being comf w gender labels aside from nonbinary. sharp/tired r kinda butchish, moreso sharp. like leather jackets, ripped jeans, dress pants/shirts, defs flannels (which r a given for any mood im in tbh) while tired is like mb softer, more focused on flannels + loose tank tops/shirts, shorts + certain skirts, comfy clothes, and the like   

ive found that i’m leaning more towards butch lately too, like i’ve been a lot more comfortable with pants and a nice top than i have w dresses or most skirts + im wondering if i was just hanging on to femininity for sake of society, so those r things 2 think abt. i still feel comf in them sometimes, but it’s getting much less often. gender’s weird, i still cant cling to one bc of how pressuring that is so genderfluidity is still smth for me + it shifting to different percentages is okay (im thinking out loud @ this point, but its helping so i hope its interesting to read)

3. Plaid button-ups or leather jackets?

both, but primarily flannels/plaid buttion-ups

5. Describe your aesthetic

aaahh theres a lot of diff aesthetics i could go into, but i have a tag if ur interested in a visual representation? basically, cosy homes, forests, wooden steps and bridges, cats, girls/nbs, water, plants, and old video game stuff, and clouds/skies. i’m sure there’s more in there, but for a good rule of thumb !! as for like dressing aesthetic, i like to look rly gay + attractive and a lil showy? like my shorts r Short and i love crop tops + a lot of my shirts show my bra thru them, + i like showing it when i can, like sports bra + a tank top is a fav look of mine bc i can make it look like my bra is a trim on the shirt + it’s cute. i’ve been wearing dresses less often, but occasionally, i like to rock one. id love a pair of combat boots but i have like size 11/12 feet + most stores dont carry that size + im hesitant to buy some online. 

7. Favorite pair of shoes?

its rly hard to find any, i have like walmart converse knockoffs atm + theyre a beige/grey color im not that huge on, it kinda reminds me of sandalwood but depressed

9. Any haircut goals for the future? 

there was the undercut!! and i have that down now c: next step is to dye it blue and mb some purple. i wanna bleach it if i’m gonna dye it, but im hesitant to do that bc of how damaging it is, but since my hair’s been cut a cpl time almost all the color is out now, so i think itll b ok if i take good care of it. 

11. Describe the worst date you’ve been on

i went to a cafe w someone (i think they were nb but i cant remember, it was like 2 yrs ago about ) and they were impossible to talk to bc they just kept saying “im awkward sorry” @ everything and like any conversations i tried to maintain were all one-shot responses, and like that was a lil frustrating. like i dont hold it against them or anything, more in a sense of i was rly tryin 2 carry it and just couldnt 

13. If taken, talk about your girlfriend/wife!

whooh i wish i was taken, i need affection + to b cute w someone 

15. Describe your dream wedding

hmmmm i havent thought much about it !! i know when i was younger i wanted to wear a black wedding dress but now im thinkin mb a suit that switches to dress @ the bottom?? that could b cool. I’d be happy w anything tbh, if im getting married, i’d just b happy to be w my wife/spouse. mb somewhere in a forest or on a boat would b cool, defs lots of good food and colorful flowers. I’d like a lot of color, most weddings ive been to are just b/w and bland for my taste (they’ve also all been straight tho so theres that.) it’s kind of wild to think that i might b married someday, but it’d b rly nice. i just haven’t thought much abt the planning of one. it’d b rly gay tho, probs give out tiny gay flags at each seat, and the cake could b lesbian flag colors. im rly drawing a blank on this, but i know id want all my friends around the country + world to be there. 

17. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?

i definitely want to live in a port town at some point !! idk where i’d like to settle down, ideally somewhere that doesnt get much hotter than 90 degrees + has lots of parks + is big enough for some events, like pride stuff, little festivals, a farmer’s market, and places to do things, such as a movie theater, bowling alley, mb an aquarium, if not one in a nearby town. hiking trails r also good. 

19. Favorite lesbian novel/story?

on a sunbeam!!! its a huge inspiration for me, and i love it so much. it always puts me in such a good mindset when i read it, and the artist is my age, so it makes me feel like I can also accomplish great things if i rly put my heart into it!! which is such a good feeling, and it has great representation + characters that i love, and its rly gay, and in space and theres ships shaped like fish + its gorgeous : D i could go on for hrs abt it + how important it is to me. theres an nb character too, and like the aspect of found families is one that rly hits home and it helped me get thru a rough time of my life + better accept myself as queer/gay. 

21. Favorite lesbian musician?

adult mom (tho i think they’re bi but still gay), or hayley kiyoko

23. Ever been assumed to be nothing more than a gal pal?

i think so, but i can’t place when, it’s been a bit. 

25. Be positive! What do you like most about being a lesbian?

talking abt being gay w other girls/nbs is lovely and cathartic, i never got to growing up bc i lived in a homophobic town + i was like dealing heavily with internalized homophobia and body/gender dysphoria so i was ace for a bit. talking more abt like sexual attraction + aesthetic attraction is new to me, and that’s been a process to get to, but it’s nice that I can now do so w/o being belittled or barraged by insult. i also just love the thought of being w someone, and daydreaming abt when that happens is really nice. also,, girls + nbs r a blessing and brighten my day and im so glad im attracted 2 them 

27. Turn ons?

absolutely communication, that’s a need. i had a bad experience w someone bc she wasn’t communicative at all, and failed to tell me that we weren’t dating despite us going on several dates + kissing??? like i wont go too into it, but hatchi matchi it was a mess. so yeah, communication, affection, and like reassurance that they actually want to be with me, and that my presence is wanted and enjoyed. I got a lot of “i dont care”s for answers last sort-of relationship, and that was rly discouraging. another turn on is for them to initiate talking and things, like holding hands or planning to hang out + such. consent is another big one. 

29. Do you usually ask other women out or do you wait for them to ask you?

i usually tend to ask them out, but im still dealing w internalized junk, so its difficult. i also havent any situations in which they liked me back, which is frustrating. like i got lead on earlier summer for abt a month until i asked what we were doing + didnt rly get an answer, and it was this whole mess. i generally try to make the first move tho, bc i know firsthand how difficult it is, but that being said, it’s still hard for me to know for sure if theyre interested + i dont wanna make things uncomf w them, so i’ll wait until i think there might b attraction. that being said, once that’s all out of the way, i like to consider myself a good flirt when im trying. 

31. Talk about your interests or hobbies!

i have lots of interests!! im obsessed w steven universe, its my fav show (and if u ever have time, we should totally watch it together sometime, i rly think you’d love it, it’s super gay + heartwarming.) i really love playing music and learning new songs, which im rly great at memorizing. talking to friends + gettin 2 know them better is always nice and fun. i like to draw new things + see the different ways ppl draw, so seeing art on here is always fun for me. i’m also rly into polygon videos (it’s a youtube channel, not like videos abt polygon haha) and this podcast called the adventure zone. season one just ended, so i might start listening to another one called friends at the table. i rly wanna start a podcast w someone, but can never find anyone to start it with. idk what I’d talk abt but if i could find a partner for it, i think it’d be a lot of fun. mb smth abt games or books/queer representation in media. doing a dnd podcast would also b rly fun, but a lot of work + editing so mb later down the road !! im blanking on other interests atm, but animations and cartoons r lovely and i aim to make something in that field one day, if not just a comic.

my hobbies r mostlyyyy drawing, dnd things now every thursday, hanging w my friends, playing video games, sometimes writing (i rly wanna start a comic, and im tryin to get my butt into gear on it), goin to parks, listening to music, and goin 2 events w roe + cesar, two of my friends. sometimes ill play music!! i need to get more than the keyboard i’m lending, but i love performing. ill also watch leg birds on youtube, theyre a lesbian couple that plays gams + theyre rly sweet. 

33. Do you love easily or does it take time for you to warm up to someone?

its easy for me to love friends, doesnt usu take me more than a few months of knowing them if were talking a lot. as for falling in love, that takes me a lot longer. ive never rly been in love w someone. i thought i was once, but rly it was just my first gay experience w someone and i wanted it to be perfect so i projected a lot of things + made it better than it seemed to myself for the duration of it, which wasn’t healthy, so i wanna avoid doing that again, + take things slower next time. or at least for what they are. 

35. Ever fallen for a straight girl?

a few times, they were just crushes tho, so it wasnt too too bad

37. Favorite comfort food?

hot cocoa or tea. as for food food, i dont think i have one. mb french toast or cinnamon rolls. 

39. Vegetarian? Vegan? None of the above?

i used to be a vegetarian!! for like a yr, but it was difficult for me to eat and feel full, and i was pretty underweight, so i stopped. 

41. Early-riser or night-owl?

both, i tend to stay up, but getting up early can be nice if i dont have to do anything. like just gently waking + making some tea and a nice breakfast + sittin around for a bit. 

43. What is your Myers-Briggs type?

enfp-a 

45. At what age did you know you were a lesbian?

i think like 16-17? it took me a bit to get words for identity, like lesbian/nonbinary and the like, but i always knew, like id call myself an individual as opposed to gendered terms that i was referred to, and always felt rly yucky w deadname + the wrong pronouns

47. Are you crushing on anyone at the moment (celebrity or otherwise)?

ive got one crush atm !! and another person who seems nice, but i wanna hang out w before like thinking abt a crush (im poly, which perhaps goes w/o saying, but i always like to state it when talking abt these things, jic )

49. Talk about your dreams/aspirations for the future

i’d like a partner or two, to get some bongos- i got to play some a couple weeks ago, and it was the most fun i’ve had playing anything!! having smth with an instant response that i could make up rhythms with was really rewarding and so much fun. i know i want a cat at some point, to go on cute dates + cuddle and kiss a lot w someone, to visit my friends in other places, dye my hair, get a better job, to travel a bit, make a comic, go to college for animation and storyboarding, mb go to camp at some point, and I’d like to make some more friends here, i’m already making some, which i’m super happy about, but it’s always nice meeting new ppl 

thank u for asking!! this was relaxing + fun, and a lot of the topics were cathartic to talk about, and i needed it. so thanks for listening too kinda

also im queen of commas, i’ve discovered while typing this

[szopenhauer]

Have you ever felt a baby kick? I saw and that was scary enough, no thx

What color pants/shorts are you wearing? brown/beige, Dave bought those sweatpants for me/us

Have you ever heard of Leonard Cohen? of course, Nat loves him

What are you usually doing at midnight? lay in my bed, probably listen to music or chat with M.

What is the worst thing you’ve ever done when you were really angry? ugh... Are there any pills you take on a daily basis? If so, what? not currently

Do you like the smell of coconuts? meh

What is the heaviest you think you can lift? depends 

Have you ever walked on a pier at the beach? yes

How about under one? also?

Do you ever talk to yourself or think deep thoughts while on the toilet? lmfao

Do you ever sing to yourself? lmfao x2

What is a sound that relaxes you? clock ticking :x

If you could have a sea creature as a pet, what would you want? octopus

How about a farm animal? chicken but I won’t

What is a song that you hate to admit you like? many

Do you ever use Urban Dictionary? very rarely

Do you find the definitions on there to be generally funny or stupid? both

What comes to your mind when you hear the word ‘transformation’? turning into animal XD

What was something you regularly played with as a child? lots of stuff

What part of your body have you had the most problems with in your life? heart, teeth, brain, skin, hair and belly

Do a lot of people check you out when you’re in public? pfft, nobody does

What is a good name for a turtle? mine was called BOB from Bob the builder 

Can you imitate any accents well?  sorta

What makes a good kisser a good kisser? dunno, not saliva for sure, yuk

Do you ever eat with your eyes closed and just focus on the taste? probably tried that before, I don’t remember

What do you dislike most about where you live right now? home, parents, town, country or smth else?

Are you watching your weight? not recently

Have you ever become really good friends with someone you found online? I have, we’re no longer friends tho

Do you have a drunk uncle? had

Do you hear weird noises in your house at night? not really, usually not

What is something you do that is generally more like something the opposite sex does? ask Nat :P

What is the girliest thing you do, if you’re a girl? *shrug*

What is the coolest tattoo you’ve ever seen? moon and sun with faces on knees <3

Have you ever created anything artistic that you’re proud of? If so, what? don’t like to show off but plenty

What is everyone else in your house doing right now? mom is in the bathroom ^^” her phone is calling but I won’t pick up

Give me your brief definition of love. it’s complicated

What is the most beautiful part of the human body, male or female? hmm...

Do you like having your ear nibbled on? it’s a weird feeling

Look down. What do you see? notes What is a subject that makes you uncomfortable? uh oh...

What is a subject you can talk on and on about and not get sick of it? it seems that dreams, OSDD/DID, my book, illnesses/diseases (those I literally got sick of lol) lately

Has anyone ever walked in on you naked? yup

How do you feel now about the first person you ever dated? funny that you mentioned that today! I met my pre-school bf in the store, last days I often see him, we say HI and wave like kids to each other since middle school when he became less VIP if you know what I mean, I don’t feel anything, I definitely wouldn’t date him now, sorry, but he is not a bad guy

What is something that needs to be invented? cure/medicine 

What always makes you burp? my IBS and GERD so all kinds of food can and not just food

What are you doing tomorrow? I plan to meet with my gf

When was the last time you were in pain? Did you take a painkiller? constantly, more or less

What was the last question that someone else asked you? I believe that my mom asked me about best time to make soup?

Does your father have any hobbies? What are they? cross stitching and reading mostly

What did the last face mask you wore look like? not applicable

Is there a specific song that you always request at parties? What is it? I don’t request songs :o

What was the last thing someone said or did, that made you chuckle? K. said he doesn’t like kpop

Who was the last relative you visited? I didn’t visit relatives for months

Do you own a hairdryer? What color is it? black and silver

Did you say ‘goodnight’ to anyone last night? mhm

Does anyone ever comment on the appearance of your handwriting? that it’s ugly...

How old were you in 1997? 5

When you hear songs about love, does it make you think of anyone? obvi

What were you doing an hour ago? eating?

Has anything fallen out of your pocket at any time recently? almost

Did anything disturb your sleep at all last night? oh well...

What kind(s) of Facebook groups are you active in, if any? just one

Do you enjoy any herbal or fruit teas? What kinds? used to

Are you currently wearing anything grey? yasss

Is anyone in your family currently pregnant? luckily not

Do you have any specific plans for this weekend? my dad’s working so I stay home

What’s the farthest you’ve chased an ice cream truck? we don’t have ice cream trucks in here

Did you get the ice cream? -

You can only bring back only one species out of extinction. What is it? moa, dodo or mammoths

Do you feel tempted to draw everywhere when you have a Sharpie? wtf

Did you see the trailer for “The Human Centipede”? hell no

Isn’t it ridiculously disgusting? that’s why I didn’t watch it

Should we stop the oil spill by filling the pipes with PlayDoh? wait what?...

Still have your baby shoes? doubt it

Do you act on impulse? very rarely

[silver-pond-of-light]

Being Praskovia

The best setting for a love story is a peaceful/bustling evening city spot.

The best setting for a story on existence's futility is an early morning. The episode I am going to describe perfectly fits in the second setting, disappointing and puny in itself.

OK. I don't want any unnecessary escalations right in the beginning! There is in fact a certain kind of mornings that I enjoy - Saturday mornings. Throughout all of my January, February and some part of March I normally don't have anywhere too important to go to except for the shop to buy smth to my coffee. That's why each Saturday I wake up all revved up about all the idle hours stretching in front of me ;)

It started the same yesterday. I woke up at 5:39 (it seems to have become my habit now) and immediately started watching all the current affairs, educational programmes that I had been putting off during the whole working week. Having waded through all the usual stuff to watch, I opened my vk-chats and found something really extraordinary. My friend had sent me a link to the film both of us included in our to-watch lists looong ago. 'England Is Mine' (2017) by Mark Gill. The film, telling the story of Morrissey’s life before he met Johnny Marr and started their famous band The Smiths.

Obviously not the best biopic in the world, but the special allure about it, for me personally, is the central character, Morrissey, the future frontman of The Smiths, the band that had changed my life and encouranged my creative inclinations.

Morrissey, his passions and influences that I once revealed here http://www.passionsjustlikemine.com/influence.htm as well as in his interviews had one of the most massive impacts on my personality. I admired both his incredibly profound lyrics and everything that inspired them. 'Bedroom years' would be mentioned as a creative incubator for everything he created as a part of The Smiths or in his solo career. Being influenced by Morrissey's example, I would often seal myself off the outside world for weeks (sometimes for months) turning only to books, movies and music for comfort. That, of course, racked my senses to a dangerously harsh degree at times.

Come to think of it, much has changed in less than a year, and while I was watching the film yesterday I caught  myself thinking that my own bedroom years seemed so distant to me. As a matter of fact, I was sometimes even happy that I was no longer concentrated on books and writing during last 6 months of my living in Krasnoyarsk and lecturing at the local uni, as all those attemps at originality would often leave me empty and alienated. I guess, that was the reason why I didn’t want to stay this kind of girl living only for a written word, for whom ‘people come second or possibly third’. At some moment of my past I’d finally got it that being Morrissey was not really cool.

I was still thinking about all these things, applying some huge efforts to concentrate on what was going on on the screen, when I realised that my mom was leaving for work. I was wearing headphones and so failed to recognize that she had been trying to attract my attention to her. Apparently, for quite a time :D What she had told me then, staying at the threshold of the room, changed my whole day.

Anyone who knows me is also aware of the fact that my mother is an extremely nice person. You can sense it straight away watching the way she laughs, uses her gestures or the way she smiles while thinking about smth. It takes just a fraction of a second to grasp her warm-hearted nature, void of offence. It is evident to whoever approaches her. And, well, she is often the one to be approached, especially by strangers! It has always made me wonder and laugh when strangers come to her asking for directions. Almost each time me go out together there is at least one person who would approach my mom, asking how to come from A to B. We have got used to it. But the day before yesterday my mom met a woman who had made some striking impression on her, and she couldn’t help sharing that.

My mom told me that she was walking home from the musical school on Surikova street she works at, when some woman suddenly approached her. As you might have already guessed, the woman wanted to know how to come to one department store in the city centre. My mom explained her how to get there and, what’s very typical of her, decided to accompany the woman. Soon she learnt the stranger’s name - Praskovia, or better say - Praskovia the Poet. The woman happened to be very easy-going and sincere. She appeared to be in  her mid-forties. Her fragile appearance together with her modest height had obviously charmed my mother. She discovered that Praskovia used to be a literature teacher at one of the Krasnoyarsk’s schools. She told that she loved working with children, but lately she had been only engaged in writing poems. Having found such an appreciative audience, she shared some of them, which my mother would later describe as a true poetry, not just tasteless and trifling doggerels anyone can come up with. 

At that moment of my mom’s story I had  realised I had an urgent need to somehow hide my eyes or turn away, as I started feeling that tears were welling behind my eyes. I pretended not to be listening and glued my eyes to the screen. After noticing that, my mother told me there still was some milk for coffee in the fridge, three waffles and an apple on the table, wished me a nice day and left.

What followed was some enormous emotional whirl and deluge of tears which I couldn’t stop for about two hours. A response too bewitching and overflowing, you’d say. Reason? The simple fact that I am too far from being Praskovia at the moment. Oh, yes, it sounds all clumsy and awkward since the most instant association with this name is a song by Uma2Rman about a girl with the same name, cheated by some guy, and having to crucify her love and feeling for him to start over again. Even without knowing the stranger I’d been told about, I recognised her poetic soul. The one that I  am afraid I am starting to lose (or have I lost it already?) This wouldn’t be a great deal unless I really cared about my writing ambitions. No. It’s not about being published, it’s just about being able to capture my feelings about the world and people out there, about music I listen to, books I read, films I watch. The thing is that in the course of these six months of my calm life in Krasnoyarsk (yes, calm, despite about 20 classes a week with my students, it is not the most challenging stuff I have ever been doing) I have somehow stopped discovering music, books and films, or these discoveries are too rare compared to what was happening in my previous life. It’s clear that I have never had much free time. Striving to live up to everyone’s expectations, I was spending my days on studies, all sorts of musical, theatrical education. What’s more, it wasn’t always that I didn’t have friends or boyfriends :D for whom I also managed to find proper time. Besides, each and every free minute was filled with books and writings. I am sensible enough to recognise that Zeitnot-issues have always been present in my life, but they never posed some daunting difficulties for me. Trying  to recall when  was the last time I wrote something personal, I could only come back to the journal’s note from November, 7th - my unofficial birthday, my usual 1-person party celebrating  life’s changes. However, I don’t really remember when  was this last time when I wrote or was able to analyse smth in a deep and eloquent way. Why has it all changed? Why have I suddenly lost resemblance with Praskovia the Poet?

Let’s face it, it’s mostly because of my current occupation entitled university professor. Sounds fancy. Makes wonderful impression on strangers. And deludes into thinking that you are cool enough  to be trying harder. I could never believe that this  sort of thing may happen to me. I was always delirious in my efforts to do my best in each and every subject, astonish everyone with my academic performance. Often at the expense of health or through some other sacrifices. I was never satisfied with myself and future prospects, and I had an yearning to improve that. Favours and respect I am enjoying at the time being at the university have probably dumbed aspiration to keep up with the best. With the best of me. I am showered with all the possible attention from my students (not all of them, but still), I am used to my function at the uni and have become comfortable with it, managing classes, checking tests and correcting essays and mistakes. The outcome has been certain blindness to the mistakes I make. Being fancy and ostensibly smart has eventually become such a familiar part of my routine that there is sometimes as much incentive to notice my intellectual and creative blind spots as there is to notice ubiquitous elements like clouds, trees or usual piles of handouts on my table :D

My reaction towards poetic genius of some stranger called Praskovia, this woman I am least likely to ever meet, exposed the trap I’ve fallen into. Deep in the cell of my heart I knew about that stranded intellectual position I inflicted upon my self with all the working hours, worthless ways of spending that little time I have. I thought, without books and my writings I would be better off. I wouldn’t need to stamp at my personal insecurities, dramas and problems while describing what’s happening to me. I decided to crucify my absorbtion with knowledge and everything intellectual, thinking that would be much better to leave out all such things, at least just to get some peace of mind. Which never happens all the same!;)

After I have learnt Praskovia, I can’t cling to such way of thinking anymore. Of course, I wouldn’t like to be as fragile and, perhaps, as helpless and lost as she seems to be. I know now, it’s impossible to solve life’s challenges at a wave of syllable. But what’s also clear to me is that I am too afraid of becoming a wordless girl. So, coming back to this Russian song I’ve mentioned above I am absolutely  positive that I can crucify or supress any kind of love, but NOT the love  for writing and it’s high time to return to everything I used to be before I’d got my current position ;)

P.S.

And if you must, go to work tomorrow Well, if I were you, I wouldn’t bother For there are brighter sides to life And I should know, because I’ve seen them (But not much often)

[echoflowertea]

Hi! I have an idea for a prompt! I know I'm a day late, so no rush whatsoever and feel free to take it or not :) It's for a Sans/Readr/Paps. Your sister and her husband have to be away for the weekend or smth and ask you to take care of their baby/toddler (whatever you think fits best for the story). So they take the child to your house where you live with the bros, but then you have to go out for a bit to take baby things, and they are left alone with the kid. They freak out, funny times ensue

here ya go, it’s my birthday so i figured i would give you the gift of a terribly overdue update!!!!

Pairing: Sans/Reader, Papyrus/Reader

Summary: A weekend with your nephew didn’t sound so bad to the skelebros. Maybe they should’ve read more parenting books.

“So you guys really don’t mind?”

“OF COURSE NOT. WE ARE EXCELLENT COMPANY.YOUR PRECIOUS NEPHEW WILL FINALLY KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE CARED FORPERFECTLY! WE HAVE PREPARED THE ULTIMATE DAY OF ULTIMATE FUN FOR SUCH ANOCCASION.”

You shot him a halfhearted smile. Papyrus’confidence almost always made you feel better, but you were a little nervousabout this. It wasn’t as if you didn’t trust the brothers, but they could be alittle…eccentric. As far as you knew, neither of them were well-versed incaring for a child, let alone a human one. Both were still vastly impressed anddisgusted with your bodily functions, which you could control, so having anunpredictable toddler around the house for the day seemed like…

“heh, don’t stress yourself so much. we gotthis.”

You observed them. Papyrus had on his childsafety gear prepped, which included taping a lot of pillows to his body so noneof his joints would end up hurting anyone. Because the brothers were…literallyskeletons, they had some parts that jutted out and could poke or stab if youweren’t careful enough. Papyrus would dress himself up in attire that spokevolumes about how gently he was going to treat this kid.

“Awesome. Thanks, guys. I know that this iskind of last minute.”

Your nephew was supposed to come by nextweek, but his mom and dad had some major things come up. Some business tripsgot moved around, some flights cancelled, and you were their last hope. Youdidn’t mind so much, but you were going to run it by your boyfriends first. Thiswas a relationship founded on open and honest communication, after all.

“SO WHEN SHOULD WE EXPECT HIM TO ARRIVE?”

You glanced at the clock. “In a few hours.When they get here, I’ll introduce you.”

Sans grinned and shoved his hands in hispockets, the pinpricks of light in his sockets flaring to life. “we’re gonnahave lots of fun.”

“You’d better not corrupt my nephew, Sans.If he learns a pun from you, I’m breaking up with you.”

“heh heh heh.”

In the short time before your nephew wasdropped off, you and Papyrus perused through the house to make sure everythingdangerous was put away. Anything knee-high was blocked off or sealed up.Papyrus was the one who crawled around on his hands and knees to make sure youdidn’t miss anything, while Sans’ idea of helping was to give half-assed wordsof encouragement from the living room couch.

The doorbell rang and you did your best tobrush the dust bunnies out of your hair before you answered. Sans beat you toit, having shuffled over clad in his signature slippers and that harmless smileon his face.

Your sister looked down at him and inhaledsharply, a little baffled at his presence. She had only ever seen him get upfrom the couch to his seat at the dining table when they stopped by for dinner,so it must’ve been a shock to see him up and about.

“Hi, Sans.”

“heya. c'mon in.”

Your sister paused and glanced over hershoulder. From this angle, you could see a pair of small, chubby hands wrappedaround her leg.

“Sweetie, it’s okay.” She bent down toscoop him up and he clung to her upper half, squeezing tight and burying hisface in the crook of her neck. “Sorry, guys. He just woke up from a nap so he’skind of grumpy.”

“He’s also never seen the new house before.Or met the skelebros,” you ventured. “Sans, Papyrus, this is Moo.”

“MOO?”

The toddler glanced up with shining eyes atthe sound of his name. On top of his head was a spotted, black-and-white capcomplete with floppy ears and tiny horns.

“He likes cows.”

“oh my god.” Sans succeeded in holding inhis laughter.

His mom and dad came in for just a fewminutes. They’d done their best to tell Moo that he would be staying with you,and considering you were his favorite aunt, he was totally cool with that. Butthe two strangers were still a little bit of an unknown for him, so he stuck tohis mom’s side the entire time.

“He should be okay until dinner. I’ve got abunch of spare clothes for him just in case he has an accident, but he shouldtell you when he needs to go.”

“You’re potty-trained, Moo? You’re such abig boy!”

He nodded and took a step away from hismom. The both of you continued to chat while Moo decided to explore the rest ofthe house on his own. His bare feet resting along the hardwood floors, hesquatted down to inspect a pair of shiny sneakers that belonged to none otherthan Papyrus himself.

“HELLO! I SEE YOU’VE SPOTTED MY SHOES!WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY THEM ON?”

Moo plopped down in response. Papyrus washappy to join him on the floor. Instead of tearing his shoes off, he insteadpulled apart the laces and loosened them up enough for the canvas material tostretch out.

Papyrus tore them off one by one andgrinned. “THERE WE GO, AND HERE YOU ARE. GIVE THEM A TRY.”

Moo looked down at his feet and raised aleg up.

“think he wants you to put ‘em on, bro.”

“OH!!! OF COURSE. HOW SILLY OF ME. HERE YOUARE, KING MOO. THE MOST DELICATE OF SLIPPERS TO ADORN YOUR FEET.”

You had to admit, it was adorable as hell.He and Papyrus seemed to be okay with each other. And although Sans didn’t wantto admit it, he was keeping an eyesocket on both of them to make sure thatnothing happened. If anything, it was more of a precaution for what-ifs ratherthan just him being overprotective. Because, like you said, kids were wildsometimes and could snap at any moment.

Proud of his new shoes, Moo did his best topush himself up and balance despite his feet being wayyy too small inside.Papyrus kept a gentle hand on his back while he flopped on over to his parentsto show them what he’d done.

“Oh, Moo! They look great on you!”

He beamed, proud of his work. “Mama! Apitcher!”

She fished out her phone and snapped one ofhim. He stretched out to grab it before she could even bend down to show him,marveling at the screen and swiping left and right. How kids adapted so quicklyto technology these days was beyond you.

It only took a few more minutes before hisparents left. You kissed your sister on the cheek and saw her off, promisingthat Moo would have a great time with you and the bros.

Well. Unfortunately, it looked like the onething your sister forgot to pack were snacks.

You thought you would be prepared for thiskinda thing. But after rushing to the kitchen once Moo started going on aboutwanting his favorite juice – pear, as it was – you realized that none of whatyou bought earlier in the week was going to suffice. In fact…as you rummagedthrough the empty boxes of cereal stuffed in the cabinets, you realized thatyou were completely cleaned out. What the hell!

“Sans, where are the fruit snacks in theshape of animals?”

“the frooty tooties? ate ‘em.”

“MORE LIKE HE CHEWED THEM UP UNTIL THEYWERE SQUISHY AND THEN USED THEM AS POSTER PUTTY TO HANG HIS NEW BLUEPRINTS UP!”

“Please tell me that’s a lie.”

“that’s a lie.”

“WAIT. HIS STATEMENT IS A LIE. BUT IF HE’SLYING ABOUT LYING, THEN DOES THAT MAKE IT A TRUTH?”

“Papyrus, no.”

“yes.”

“WHO DO I BELIEVE???”

You knew that you had to go out and getsome more age-appropriate snacks. Papyrus’ bone-shaped crackers were not goingto be a good combo for a kid who would’ve shoved as many as he could’ve downhis throat. That and the recipe was specifically made for making sure that theskeletons were calcified all to hell, which might’ve been a little weird tofeed a human child. Who knew what kind of repercussions would come out of that.

“Moo, follow me for a sec, okay?” You tookhim by the hoof – err, hand – and led him to the living room. He was alreadybouncing and looked restless. You had no clue when his last meal or snack was,but you weren’t ready to deal with the aftermath just yet.

It was kind of a crappy thing to do, butyou needed some time to talk to the boys in private. So you flicked on the TVand let him busy himself with the mindless chatter of some educationalcartoons.

“Okay, guys. We need a game plan.”

“EXCELLENT. I’LL GRAB MY JOURNAL. ONEMOMENT!” Papyrus rushed out of the room.

Every week Papyrus would pick his best mealfrom an array of dishes he cooked over the week, take about a day to create aphotorealistic painting of it, and then put it on the wall to cover a wall safefull of his most precious treasures. The safe was your idea, so that the dogsnooping around wouldn’t get into his figurines any more. Sans was the one whosuggested switching out the cover so people wouldn’t get suspicious. Why thatseemed logical, you would never know.

After snatching the book, Papyrus returnedto the kitchen for your huddle. He was focused, pen in his gloved hand,eyesockets narrowed, ready to strike the page with copious notes andillustrations.

“whaddid you wanna talk about, babe?”

“Moo needs snacks, since you so graciouslydecided to relieve him of those.”

“yer welcome.”

You sniffed. “Anyways, I need you guys torun to the store and pick him up some stuff. I’ll keep an eye on him here whileyou’re gone.”

“OF COURSE. BRILLIANT. I WOULD EXPECTNOTHING LESS FROM MY OTHER HALF.” Papyrus dotted his i’s and crossed his t’s,his careful penmanship a marvel even from all the way where you stood. “I, FORONE, AM GLAD TO EXPLORE THE BELLY OF THE BEAST OTHERWISE KNOWN AS SOOPERSAVERS!THEY EVEN HAVE THEIR OWN SPICE AISLE. HOW EXCITING.”

“sure, we’ll get in and out in under twentyminutes.” Sans winked.

That mischievous look on his face wasenough to put a wrench in your plans. “Okay, wait a second. I think I decidedtoo fast. Papyrus, we can’t trust Sans to go with anyone to the store. Rememberlast time? He locked you in the freezer for an hour.”

Papyrus gasped. “OH, NO. I HAD ALMOSTFORGOTTEN THOSE TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE MEMORIES!!! THE LOOK OF ABSOLUTE CONTEMPT ONTHE CARTOON COWS’ FACES AS I RESTED AMONG THE DAIRY. THEY SILENTLY JUDGED MYBONE DENSITY AND TEMPTED ME WITH WHISPERS OF CALCIUM INFUSED DRINKS!!!”

Sans kept his downright devilish grin,causing a sweat to bead on his brother’s forehead.

“DON’T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT, SANS.”

“well, you n’ me could go.” Sans swunghimself up on the kitchen counter. You weren’t sure how he managed to do thatgiven he was short as hell, but it was best not to question him and his casualabuse of physics. “my bro could stay here with the kid, and you’d make sure iwas on my best behavior.”

“HMM, TRUE. THOUGH THAT WOULD LEAVE ME ATQUITE THE DISADVANTAGE, AS MOST OF MY ACTIVITIES REQUIRE THREE PEOPLE! WE ARETRYING TO MAKE A GOOD FIRST IMPRESSION ON MOO, SANS.”

“That and we would never get anythingdone.” You left it at that. You weren’t going to sit there and give him thesatisfaction of mentioning what happened on June 15th. You still hada scar in the shape of a bite mark that refused to go away, no thanks to him.

“WELL, WE COULD LEAVE SANS HERE ALONE ANDDO THE SHOPPING BY OURSELVES.”

You and Papyrus exchanged looks, then burstout laughing. Yeah, right. The entire house would be in shambles by the timeyou got back.

“hey, i resent that…you’re completelyright.”

You snorted. “Okay, so that’s one moreoption down. I guess this leaves one solution. Papyrus, Sans….are you two okayto stay here and watch Moo by yourselves for about an hour?”

Papyrus was quick to agree. Sans shruggedit off.

“WITH MY FAMILIARITY OF THE HOUSE, I WILL HAVENO TROUBLE DEFENDING MYSELF FROM SANS’ PRANKS. AND WE WILL SURELY BE ABLE TOCOMPLETE AT LEAST THREE PUZZLES WITH ALL OF US PARTICIPATING.”

“you gonna be ok buying groceries byyourself, babe?”

“I should be good. I’m more concerned aboutyou guys. But if you’re sure you can handle it, then I would really, reallyappreciate it.”

They both perked up. Any mention of yourapproval sent a pleasant shiver through their bones. Mostly because they lovedyou so much that making you happy was probably one of the only goals theyshared in life. (That and making sure they never missed an episode of the showall of you adored: Tales of the Aboveground, where monsters from all overshared their experiences of living on the surface.)

“THEN IT’S SETTLED. GOODBYE! WE WILL SEEYOU IN A BIT!”

“Hey, wait—”

You barely had a chance to get another wordout before you were shoved outside the front door, your bag magicallypositioned on your shoulder and keys around your fingers. You wanted to givethem some last minute advice, but the absolute Determination on their facesspoke volumes about their commitment to this. They would get through themorning without you and they weren’t going to take no for an answer.

Papyrus made sure to lock the door with aquick flick of his wrist, turning the small button on the knob despite yourprotests from outside. He sniffled.

“NYOO HOO HOO. I HATE TO LEAVE HER ON OURDOORSTEP. BUT WE HAVE TO BE STRONG.”

“it’s ok.”

“YOU’RE RIGHT. MOO NEEDS US.” Papyrus stoodto his full height and narrowed his eyes. “NOW…WHERE IS HE?”

Both paled.

“SANS ARE YOU TELLING ME WE ARE THIRTY-FIVESECONDS INTO OUR DEBUT AS BABYSITTERS AND WE HAVE LOST THE CHILD???”

“relax, bro. he’s gotta be somewhere in thehouse.”

Both went silent for any clues. Aside fromthe gentle trickling of water upstairs, it was relatively peaceful.

Wait…

Trickling water?!

“THE BATHROOM! SANS!!!”

“what about it?”

“HE’S IN THERE! STOP TRYING TO DISTRACT ME!LET’S GO!!!”

Papyrus put his gloved hand on the railingand propelled himself upward the long flight of stairs, Sans trailing behind.

The closer they got to the top, the louderthe noises became. Splashing and giggles. There were a million things thatcould’ve gone wrong when they opened the door, ninety-nine percent of which youwould probably dump them for. And they weren’t going to let that happen.  

“MOO? ARE YOU IN THERE? I WOULD LIKE TOCOME IN AND JOIN YOU!”

Papyrus jiggled the doorknob.

Locked.

“aw, shit.”

“SANS! WHAT DO WE DO?! WE HAVE NO ACCESS TOHIM! HE COULD BE DOING TERRIBLE THINGS IN THERE!”

“relax, bro. we made sure to turn off thewater for the tub. we put on the special seat for the toilet, and all themedications are locked up. there’s nothin’ he could do from his height.”

At that perfect moment, both brotherslooked down to see their feet sinking into a puddle of water creeping out fromunder the door.

Sans started to sweat.

“WELL, LOOKS LIKE THIS IS A JOB FOR MYIMMEASURABLE STRENGTH. STAND BACK, SANS!”

Papyrus readied himself at the door. Thesheer power of his love for you would surely get him through.

“ONE….” He would be a hero!

“TWO…” You would be so impressed with histoddler caring skills!

“THREE!”

He went for a running start and the dooropened.

“GGAAAAAAKKK!”

He dug his heels into the floor and bracedhimself for impact, doing his very best to stop his body from launching intothe room. All he could see was a hundred scenarios that ended up in someonebeing injured, from a minor scrape to complete and utter annihilation. Maybe hewas spending too much time with Undyne after all. His mind was getting to befar more dramatic than he would’ve liked for such a delicate situation.

As he poured his last ounce of strengthinto stopping dead in his tracks, the tip of his shoe caught on the rug Sansinsisted that they place right outside the bathroom. The gross, musty one hepicked up from a garage sale because he thought it was “a bargain”. Yeah, a bigpile of disgustingness and a cheesy line! What kind of pun was, “make some roomfor dessert”???

Papyrus teetered forwards and went crashingdown onto the floor. It didn’t hurt, but it was unpleasant to feel the stifftufts of the rug’s fabric scraping against his bones. Dazed, he lifted his headjust high enough to see the damage.

Moo had somehow tipped the trashcan overand stood up high enough for him to reach over to the sink. He had taken giantwads of toilet paper, coated them in water and soap, and then slapped the mushymass all over the bathroom. On Papyrus self-portrait made of dry pasta. Onthe cute little figurines that you swore brought life to the place. And even onSans’ joke book that had at least fifty unsanitary references!

With his consciousness fading and lastmortified look, Moo took the toilet brush and brought it up to his mouth tosniff it.

Sans knew that his brother would be okay,but it was still hilarious to see him faint like that. He mostly did it when heoverloaded on sensory things, which happened more often when Papyrus didn’thave his gloves on. But today it might’ve just been a combination of all newthings plus the pretty disgusting state the bathroom was in.

Sans couldn’t be prouder of the little guy.Already destroying the grossest room in the entire house. Man, humans werefascinating already with their digestive systems, but all the tools and suchused to help keep things civilized was enough to make him crack up. Seeing alittle kid completely oblivious toward all of that and dismantling the entirepolite system they had going on was amazing.

“kid, i think we’re gonna get along.”

He stuck his hand out, and was promptlygiven a slimy wad of tissue covered in snot.

“oh, man. that’s disgusting. i love it.”

Papyrus stirred from his unscheduled nap.He felt a little groggy, but the anxiety from before he passed out lingeredlong enough for him to snap back to reality. He sat up and rubbed at hiseyesockets.

“SANS? MOO? ARE YOU BOTH HERE?”

The whole bathroom was in disarray. Papyruscouldn’t bear to look! He reached for the door handle and made sure he didn’thave to subject his eyes to any more torture.

Papyrus happened to glance down at hischest while he pulled himself up from the floor. Pinned to his chest, along thepillow armor that had been fitted on him somehow, was a simple note.

countto ten, then see if you can find us

“I AM NOT PLAYING THIS GAME!” he shouted. “OH,WAIT. THERE IS ANOTHER MESSAGE WRITTEN ON THE BACK OF THE PAPER.” He turned itover.

yougotta. if you’re still not convinced, flip me over again

“WHAT!!!” Papyrus did as he was told.

wait,how does this paper have three sides? anyway, if you don’t do it i’ll trashyour room. love, your bro

“I HATE THIS!!!!” And, against his betterjudgment… “ONE, TWO, THREE…”

After ten agonizing seconds, Papyrus madehis way downstairs. He found a trail of flour leading to the backdoor, at leastfive toys strewn across the floor, some plastic utensils wedged between thecouch cushions, and the phone was off the hook with someone shouting on theother line.

“HELLO?” Papyrus scrambled for the phone,managing to wrestle it up to his face despite the long retro cord being tangledup in knots. “YOU HAVE REACHED THE HOME OF THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HIS EQUALLY GREATLADY, AND ONE LAZY BROTHER, HOW CAN I ASSIST YOU?”

“Paps? It’s me. Is everything okay?”

His breath caught in his throat. Somehow. “AH!!!YES, EVERYTHING IS GOING GREAT!” He started to sweat. “HOW IS THE STORE? HAVEYOU FOUND PRODUCTS AT REASONABLE AND UNBEATABLE PRICES?”

“I think so. I’m in line right now, butthere’s only one cashier and he looked like a new hire. He’s paging the emptystore for someone to do a price check on Mettamuffins. Oh my god. Now he’spanicking.”

“THIS STORY IS INCREDIBLY INTERESTING ANDDOWNRIGHT SCANDALOUS, BUT I HAVE SOME…THINGS…TO ATTEND TO.”

“Hmm. Are you sure you’re doing okay?”

He nearly cracked, but didn’t. “OF COURSEWE AM! I MEAN, OF COURSE I ARE! I WILL JUST HAVE TO MAKE SURE I CLEAN UP SOMEOF OUR…ACTIVITIES! GOOD LUCK ON CHECKING OUT YOUR ITEMS! SMOOCH!!!”

He hung up and heard a quiet snicker in theroom.

“SANS, I KNOW YOU’RE IN HERE. THIS CHILD’SPRESENCE HAS MADE YOU EVEN MORE…CHILDISH!!! PLEASE COME OUT OF HIDING, SHE ISCOMING BACK SOON AS WE NEED TO FIX THIS PLACE UP!”

No answer.

Papyrus crossed his arms and thought deeplyon where his brother would be hiding. His favorite spot to snooze in as of latewas the closet near the front door. But it didn’t look like that side of thehouse had been touched just yet. Sans also liked to roll under the couch andsleep under the comfortable weight of the cushions, but when he did that, healmost always managed to kick one slipper off. No sign of that.

As he rubbed his chin thoughtfully, a smalldroplet of liquid splashed against the top of his skull.

“…SANS!!!”

“heh heh. ya got me.”

Papyrus looked up and put his hands on hiships. Sans had somehow crawled up to the corner of the ceiling and was wedgedup there.

“WHERE IS MOO?”

“around here. told him to hide.”

“WE NEED TO BE WATCHING HIM!”

Sans slipped down the length of the wallwithout batting an eye. “ok, ok. i told him to hide in my room. let’s check itout.”

The trek toward the brothers’ bedrooms waslong and arduous, filled with slick spots of melting sticks of butter and granola.A gross combination, and Papyrus wasn’t even sure how he managed to get accessto more food. So much for locking everything up. But despite the harsh terrain,both brothers persisted until they reached Sans’ safe haven.

“hey, bro. what’re you doing? knock first.”

“THERE IS NO TIME FOR FORMALITIES. MOO, IAM COMING IN!”

The stench was unbearable. Dirty clotheslying haphazardly on the floor. A lampshade on the floor. Cloudy test tubesstacked on top of each other. Crumpled bedsheets, pillows stained with coffeeand tea, a plate caked with mysterious gray mold. The entire place looked likeit had seen the wrath of a certain three-year-old.

“everythin’ looks normal to me.”

“OH MY GOD. THE SMELL IS EVEN WORSE THAN ITWAS THIS MORNING!”

“oh yeah. i forgot to put this back in thefridge.” Sans picked up a cup of milk that already started to bubble in the smoldering,stuffy summer heat. “was gonna see if i could ferment this, but figured it’d bebetter to start another day.”

“DO YOU SEE HIM?”

“nope. call him.”

“MOOOOOOO!”

Sans’ eyesockets crinkled. “bro, are youpart cow?”

“NO.”

“because that impression was moo-ving.”

“STOP THIS.”

Then they heard it. A gasp. It was faint,but it was there.

“IS THAT…THE ATTIC???”

How did one child manage to maneuver aroundso easily? Humans were so tenacious! Neither of them could imagine raising oneof their own if they were all like this!

“MOOOOOO!”

“moooo.”

It was dark. How did he even navigate? Whenyou moved in with the brothers, there was so much extra stuff that it was allshoved up here. You and Sans promised to sort through it, but every time youwere both up here at the same time, you ended up just making a giant mess andleaving it worse off than when you came.

Papyrus nearly tripped over a giant chestfull of early courting gifts from him. You said they needed to be kept in asafe place, and that they were priceless, so they had to be stored away. Hebelieved you wholeheartedly, because you had wrapped them up in the softestblankets to shield them from dust and time. That and he caught you sneaking uphere sometimes just to admire them.

“bro, did you hear that?”

“HEAR WHAT?”

Sans froze. His eyesockets went dark.

“we’ve been cornered.”

Jumping out from the shadows, fingerssplayed and mouth opened wide, was Moo.

“Raaaah!”

Both of the brothers were surprised, butdid their best not to laugh. A tiny human in a cow costume roaring at them likea dinosaur was…probably the best thing they’d seen in weeks. It didn’t helpthat Moo charged toward them, bending down on all fours, the tiny tail sewn onhis backside flapping with every bounce toward them.

“PLEASE DON’T HURT US!” Papyrus cried.

But it was too late. Moo had conquered themboth, crawling on top of their toppled bodies and declaring himself as thewinner with a loud, long roar.

“alright, kiddo. let’s get you backdownstairs.” Sans plucked him off his chest and tucked him under an arm. “yougave us a big scare.”

“YOU COULD HAVE HURT YOURSELF…” Papyrusbegan. But after seeing the near teary look in Moo’s eyes, he recanted. “YOUWERE VERY BRAVE TO COME UP HERE BY YOURSELF. BUT NEXT TIME YOU SHOULD PLAY NEARUS, OKAY? WE WANT TO SEE MOO THE DINOSAUR UP CLOSE!”

All three of them headed back to the livingroom where Moo’s giant bag still sat untouched.

“I HAVE A COLORING BOOK I THINK YOU WOULDLIKE.”

“Crayons, please!”

“nice job, kid. use yer manners and you’llget far.”

“I SHOULD WASH HIS CLOTHING IN A FEW HOURS.HE LOOKS STICKY. OR IS THAT NORMAL FOR HIS AGE?”

Everything was okay after that. Some minorincidents – like Moo breaking a crayon and then throwing a tantrum despitebeing given the exact same color to use instead. The brothers had to muster up alltheir patience to deal with his screams and flailing limbs, but they managed toget him to stop wailing after a while.

In the end, the house was completelytrashed, but everyone was safe and sound.

You parked the car in the driveway andrummaged through the bag, grabbing a piece of candy to shove in your mouth. Ugh.What was supposed to be a quick trip to the store ended up being the biggestnightmare of your life. Long lines, rude customers, unorganized shelves, aclown blocking your nearest exit until you donated to his law school fund, andeven a broken traffic light that resulted in a twenty-minute detour through afuneral motorcade.

Needless to say, you were relieved to behome.

After gathering everything in your arms,you headed to the door. A smarter person would’ve called the brothers to letthem know that you were here, but you were so exhausted that the thought nevereven crossed your mind.

Knock. Knock.

“who’s there?”

“Sans.”

“sans who?”

“Sans, please let me in, my arms are goingnumb!”

“i don’t get it.”

“PERHAPS THE HUMOR LIES IN THE REALISM.”

“oh, ok.”

You heard him unlatch the door and youpractically burst in. “Someone please help me get these to the kitchen!”

Papyrus did more than that. He simplyscooped you up, bags and all, so that you were no longer crumbling under theircrushing weight. You were relieved to receive help, but gosh, it did bring a littlecolor to your cheeks when he easily carted you around like that.

He set you down in the middle of thekitchen. Without hesitation, you made your way into the fridge and startedshoving all sorts of snacks inside.

“So? How did it go, guys?”

Sans grinned. “eh, so boring.”

“What, really?”

“IT WAS…NEW.”

You peered over the fridge door. “I don’tknow if I like the sound of that. Where’s Moo?”

“NAPPING ON THE COUCH.”

“Wait, you guys actually got him to sleep?”

“he was kinda giving us a run for ourmoney, so it’s nice he decided to help us out with that.”

“Oh, no. Was he a handful?”

“heh. you decide.”

You blinked and stepped away from yourlittle comfort zone, only to fully drink in how destroyed the house was.

Yeah, it looked like a toddler had beenthrough here, all right. Everyone’s possessions poked and prodded. Annoying Dogeven had a balloon strapped to its tail, trying its best to run away from it asit hovered menacingly over its back. The walls had some minor scribbles hereand there, the carpet had splotches of (what you hoped was washable) paint,there were scraps of paper and a pair of kid scissors scattered along thefloor, and even Moo’s stuffed cow was completely soaked.

“Do I want to know?”

“not really.”

“WE HAD FUN, THOUGH.”

You sighed, relieved, and smiled at them.Your chest even felt a little tight. Ew, you were about to get sappy on them.Sugar overload.

“Thanks, guys. I’m really glad.”

“NOW YOU CAN HELP US WATCH OVER MOO FOR THEREST OF THE DAY!”

“yep.” Munch. “might as well include you onthe fun. ‘sides, you haven’t even seen how he pronounced the word ‘fantastic’.”Swallow.

“…why would he even say that in the firstplace?” you ventured. “Wait, never mind. The point is. You two were a hugehelp. I couldn’t have done this without you, and…I’m really looking forward tothe rest of Moo’s visit if I have both of you here with me.”

Papyrus’ eyesockets sparkled. Sans wasembarrassed, but shot you a cheesy grin anyway.

“Alright, when he wakes up, I’ll make him asnack plate. Sans, can you stop eating for a sec and hand me the FrootyTooties?”

“uh…whoops.”

[birlcholtz]

Ch. 8: come home (to you, to us)

ao3 | ch. 1 | part of the zimbits airport au

About half an hour later, Bitty hears the garage door open and close, and then Coach and Suzanne’s muffled voices. Nobody comes upstairs to find him, so he disregards it and goes back to rambling in the old group chat that Shitty had insisted on keeping around— even once he, Lardo, Ransom, and Holster had graduated and Bitty was the only group chat member still at Samwell, Shitty claimed it was ‘his duty’ to give them updates on what was going on.

Bitty: i mean what am i even supposed to do now that i don’t have hockey as motivation to exercise

Bitty: running is gross

Bitty: punching bags are just.... ew, not good

Bitty: weights are meh

Bitty: i can’t just do squats???

Ransom: well jack’s solution to that problem was to join a pro hockey team

Bitty: i’m not getting paid to exercise

Holster: u should like

Holster: join an amateur league

Holster: or smth

Lardo: dude just accept that you can’t afford a car and public transportation is expensive and you’re gonna have to walk everywhere

Lardo: gettin those 10000 steps a day

Lardo: millennial exercise

Shitty: stop being depressing in the group chat LARDO

Shitty: (but she’s right)

Bitty: ew reality

Ransom: can u get a gym membership?

Bitty: not until i have money

Holster: burn calories by running away from your problems

Holster: zoom

Shitty: hOLSTER

Holster: shits ur literally still in school u don’t have to deal with this yet

Shitty: truE BUT STILL

Holster: u small bean

Shitty: ...bitch???

After that, the group chat moves at lightspeed, and Bitty’s content just to sit back and watch it happen. He counts no less than eight invocations of Holster’s age and size advantage and three of Shitty’s mustache. It’s only when there are soft footsteps in the hallway and a knock on Bitty’s door that he realizes how long he’s been sitting there watching his fellow alums (oh God) descend into a near brawl.

“Hey, Dicky,” his mother says when he gets up and opens the door. “Dinner’s ready, if you want it now. If not, we’ll save some for you and you can heat it up when you’re hungry. Your father told me you’re having a rough day.”

Bitty sighs. “It’s been a trying one,” he offers, and Suzanne nods in acknowledgement. He takes the now-empty plate of pralines, since there’s no point in leaving it in his room, and they walk downstairs in silence.

Dinner is interesting in that it’s so different from usual. Suzanne is willing to avoid making Bitty talk, but for once it’s Coach who carries the conversation. He carefully steers it away from Bitty at every opportunity, which is nice of him, but Bitty is completely verbal, he’s just... well, he’s tired. The tears left him feeling dried-up, almost, and Bitty doesn’t have enough energy to be emotional. He probably should’ve taken a nap before dinner, but it’s too late now. He can just go to bed early and hope that sleep serves as a reset of some sort— maybe he won’t wake up feeling so drained.

“Oh, and I’m hoping you can tell me what happened to all of those pralines that we made,” Suzanne says to Coach with a faint smile as she takes the third-to-last piece of garlic bread. “Funnily enough, a lot of them seemed to have vanished by the time I got home.”

“That was mostly me,” Bitty speaks up. His parents glance over at him in surprise, probably because he hasn’t been saying anything. “But Coach started it.”

When Suzanne looks over at Coach to confirm or deny that, he just shrugs.

“Well, alright then,” she says, and moves on while Bitty is still wondering if he should take the opportunity in front of him. She’s asking Coach about the plans for new locker rooms at the high school before he can say anything else.

Bitty finishes his food in silence, and then sits and stares at the table, not wanting to go to bed with the prospect of telling his mother still hanging over his head, but not wanting to say the words either. There’s no lead-in this time, no convenient discussion of roommates that he can use to bring it up. So how?

Coach must have assumed that Bitty’s not going to tell Suzanne tonight, because he’s still determinedly talking at length about how the team will have more locker space to store their gear. He’s only just started extolling the virtues of the new lighting when Bitty folds up his napkin and sets it neatly on the placemat. When he stands up, both of his parents look at him in surprise, and the force that he pushed his chair back with probably was surprising.

Bitty picks up his plate and cup to take to the dishwasher before saying, “Mom, I’m gay.”

The words come out calmer than he’d expected.

Suzanne blinks.

“I’m gay,” he repeats. “And I’m dating Jack Zimmermann.”

Then he puts his cup and plate in the sink and goes up to his room and shuts the door and sits on his bed and squeezes Señor Bun’s paw with one hand while he unlocks his phone with the other and composes three texts and sends them off.

The first one is to last year’s starting line. Chowder, Nursey, Dex, Whiskey, and Tango. Bitty reserves more personal things for this group chat instead of the team-wide one— not just because he was the captain, but also because there are only so many people he actually wants to vent about his life to. Hey y’all, just came out to my mom, send good vibes my way pls.

The second is to the same alumni groupchat that only just finished calming the fuck down. sooo now my mom knows im gay and that i have a boyfriend, am currently waiting in my room hoping that when i come back down things will be ok. left b4 she cld react.

The third is to Jack. told my mom, went to my room without waiting to see how she reacted. gonna go back down and see what the fallout is in like half an hour. i have a bag packed just in case, i’ll let you know if i’m coming over.

Jack responds immediately, as do other people who’d gotten one of his first two texts, but Bitty answers Jack’s first.

Jack: I have a rental car if you need a ride. Just let me know.

Bitty: i don’t think i will, but i’ll call and give u an update once i know more

Bitty: rn i’m just killing time

Jack: I’ll call you in an hour to check in if I don’t hear from you before then.

Bitty: talk to u in a lil bit

The two group chats that he’s texted have blown up over the course of his short conversation with Jack, mostly expressions of hope from the frogs and tadpoles and calm texts from the other alums meant to reassure. Bitty sends the frogs and tadpoles a quick thank you before turning to the other group chat.

Bitty: i have a contingency plan if things go horribly bad

Bitty: but my dad is ok w it

Bitty: so im giving him and my mom time to talk before i go back down there

Lardo: i think that’s a good idea

Holster: Pls. keep us updated about what’s happening.

Holster: Ransom is in the shower but he says if you need help w. anything hit us up.

Holster: (I concur)

Lardo: same, i already said u can crash on our couch, it’s ok if u want to stay here for a while

Lardo: but if ur dad is fine w it then i’m sure ur mom will be too

Shitty: ^^^^^

Shitty: dw

Shitty: #smhgotyourback

Holster: shitty i have been a college graduate for over a year and i’m crying over a gd hashtag.

Holster: why

Shitty: u know it’s true brah

Bitty’s stomach hurts when he walks downstairs, nauseous anticipation. He feels tense. His shoulders are hunched practically up to his ears.

He drops his bag in the front hallway before turning and walking into the kitchen. Suzanne and Coach are there, still sitting at the table. There are three glasses of sweet tea. Without that clue, Bitty wouldn’t have thought that they’d gotten up at all.

“Please sit down, Dicky,” Suzanne says when she sees him standing in the doorway.

Bitty sits, and for a little while, that’s what they do. Sit in silence. Until she sighs and says, “I will admit that whenever I pictured my future family, I always thought that my child would be straight.” She looks tired. “Although I can’t say I’m exactly surprised, either.”

Coach takes a sip of his tea.

“I’m not going to pretend to understand, because I don’t,” Suzanne says. “But I love you. You’re still my son, Eric Richard Bittle Junior. You still bake and you still skate and you’re still going to Boston to find a job in a week. None of that has changed.”

“No, it hasn’t,” Bitty agrees quietly.

“And I don’t want you going halfway across the country thinking I don’t love you, or you’re disowned, because neither of those things are true. I won’t lie to you and say it’s a great idea to tell the rest of the family— I’m sure you’ve already thought about that— but when it comes down to it, family you see twice a year aren’t as important as family you’re with every day, and I’m sure you know that too.” She drinks some of her tea. “I just hope that home doesn’t become such a painful place for you that you can never come back. Even if it’s just for a visit.”

“I haven’t left yet, Mama.”

Suzanne sniffs. Coach silently gets up and brings back a box of tissues, setting it on the table equidistant from his wife and his son. “That is true, isn’t it. I’m not letting you leave without trying that pot roast.”

Bitty smiles a little. “I don’t think that’ll be a problem.”

Bitty: it went ok

Chowder: that’s great!!!! congratulations!!!!!!!

Nursey: good to know

Tango: are u still coming up to mass. for the summer or are u staying there??

Bitty: still coming to boston!

Dex: see you soon then!

Whiskey: :) :) :)

Bitty: she’s not thrilled but she’s ok w it

Lardo: fuckin called it

Holster: excuse u u did not call anything

Lardo: umm yes i did???

Ransom: that’s good to hear bitty, we’re v happy for u except holster is busy being irritated at lardo? apparently?

Shitty: congrats brah, that’s a big thing you just did

Shitty: totally celebrating when u get here

Bitty: so overall everything went fine, my mom is not exactly ecstatic but she’s happy i told her

Bitty: oh and my parents want to meet u since i mentioned u were staying in madison for a little while?

Bitty: ur officially invited to the bittle residence on tuesday for pot roast

Jack: I’ll be there. How do you feel?

Bitty: lighter i guess?

Bitty: it hasn’t sunk in that i’m rlly out to both of my parents and it went ok

Jack: It’ll sink in eventually.

Bitty: yup

Jack: And you also never have to come out to your parents again.

Bitty: that’s a definite plus

Jack: Go to sleep early okay? You sound exhausted.

Bitty: i am

Bitty: yeah i’m gonna do that now. gn, ttyl, love you <3

Jack: I love you too. <3 <3 <3 <3

Jack: Talk to you tomorrow.

Bitty: :)

Jack: :-)