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rosemary-morgan · 1 year ago

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Javier Escuella X F.Reader - It's never to late to repent (Part 4) 18+

(Pictures found on pinterest/google. That one with Javier is mine. Collage made by me 🌺)

Many thanks to @fangirl-ramblings 🖤 she has been beta reading for me 🌹

The 4 Part is online 🥰 thanks to all who read and like my story 🐝🌺 I hope you will enjoy the this chapter too!

Tag list: @fangirl-ramblings @rose-of-black-blood @livingdeadgirly @coaxium-captain-rex @12timetraveler @butterballchannie @charlesjaviersimp @ashethesimp @planetahmane @snoowply @sylum @noodle-tm @karmashatty @nadnad09 @lill2350 @slightlyexpiredyogurt8 @natnuszsstuff @boniscute @books-arebetterthan-boys @pedropascalluvr69 @blackrosegarden6 @sie-werden-nie-vergessen @inlovewithjavierescuella

If anyone of you want to be tagged to not miss the newest chapter, please let me know 🙏 If you want me to take you off the list, please tell me

And sorry if there are errors with the Spanish words. Please tell me if so. Thanks 🖤

👉Read part 1 / part 2 / part 3

Warning: Nsfw 18+! Very erotic stuff y'all, trigger moments, angst

Summary: The love between you had never stopped and your nights are now again marked by passion. But there is a dark secret that you can not tell Javier. Not yet, for it would break his heart. Now that you had found each other again, you didn't want to risk it all. But he has a right to know…

Javier Escuella X F.Reader - It's never to late to repent (Part 4) 18+

You still couldn't believe that Javier was standing in front of you. Just when you were about to throw all your hopes overboard, a small miracle happened. Javier's eyes sought your gaze and you could clearly see that he was afraid of your reaction. He was very tense, but how could you refuse him now? After you had so ardently wished that he would come and see you?

"I… um, Y/N, listen, I know… this…"

The words were stuck in his throat, because he really didn't know what to say. How was he supposed to find the right words either?

"I needed to see you, Y/N… But… I understand if you have finally lost your patience with me. I understand if…"

You approached him without words and the next moment you threw yourself into his arms. Full of relief, he closed his eyes, his arms immediately wrapped around your body and he hugged you tightly. He immediately buried his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent deeply. God, how he had missed your lovely scent!

"Javier…"

Your voice trembled as you whispered his name. Your hands clawed desperately at his raven black hair as your tears ran unstoppably down your face. You heard Javier sigh softly, followed by a quiet sob before he swallowed.

"Y/N… I'm sorry…" he whispered against your neck and you could feel his tears wetting your skin. His warm, strong body nestled against yours made you feel safe and secure.

You looked straight into his eyes as he took hold of your tender face and begged you again to forgive him.

"Lo siento mucho, Y/N!"

His cheeks grew quite warm, the tears ran inexorably down his face. So much pain, so much sorrow and regrets were on his face. Too many emotions to cope with.

"I have caused you so much grief."

But instead of facing him with anger and hatred, you just smiled through tears. The time for scorn was long gone and everything you wanted, you now had. Your dearest Javier had returned.

Gently you placed your hands on his, your lips were so close, you could feel each other's warm breath.

"I've only ever thought of you, Javier. All these years…"

And that was when Javier couldn't take it anymore and without warning, he kissed her. Instantly, your knees went all soft, blissful lap through your whole body.

"How could I ever forget you?" whispered Javier, before kissing you longingly again, brushing the strands of your hair from your face.

Words of love filled your house and every single word came from the depths of your soul. From two people who had suffered immensely without the other. Neither of you ever wanted to be apart again.

"Te quiero! Te quiero mucho, Y/N! Yo nunca dejé de amarte!"

And you had never stopped loving him either. This moment seemed like a beautiful dream and you were so afraid of letting go of Javier. You were afraid that this beautiful moment could burst like a soap bubble. It wouldn't be bearable for you a second time.

"I love you, Javier."

Desperately you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and Javier held you tightly, enveloping you with his arms like the wings of an angel.

Suddenly he knelt in front of you, wrapped his arms around your middle and he pressed his face against your stomach, sighing heavily and you could feel that he was trembling. Javier could do nothing, his tears would not end. You lovingly stroked his black hair. Good God, how much time you had lost… how much had been taken from you…

When Javier looked up to you, his eyes were filled with warmth and trust. As his warm hands laid on your tender arms, you suddenly felt hot and deepest excitement shot through your body. His touch felt so damn good and you closed your eyes for a moment, your heart pounding like crazy.

"Javier…"

"Y/N…"

Javier whispered your name, rising from his spot. He stood close to you, his warm breath brushing your cheek. His hands squeezed your arms and you gasped, closing your eyes. A lustful sigh escaped your lips as Javier gently pressed your body against his.

"The nights were so cold… so lonely without you, mi rosa…" he whispered hoarsely against your lips and you thought you would lose your mind at any moment. Between your legs was tingling like crazy and you wanted, no, you needed his touch, his lips, his body…

His lips gently brushed your cheek and you could hear how aroused he was too.

"I've dreamed of this moment so many times, Y/N," Javier groaned in your ear and he closed his eyes, breathing in your seductive scent, burying his face in the crook of your neck with a deep sigh. Carefully you wrapped your arms around his neck, letting the wave of pleasure take you for good.

"The warmth of your body, the taste of your lips… I almost went crazy without you…"

His fingers ran over your arms as he said this.

"Javier…"

As his hand gently touched your cheek, you leaned into his touch. Javier had always been tender and you had missed that feeling so much. His beautiful eyes took in every little detail of your face. Your shapely lips, the long lashes and your eyes that shimmered with tears.

"Your touches, your kisses…. I missed them so much, Javier…"

And that was never to be again, Javier had told himself. Yet when your lips met, your kiss instantly ignited like a fire. Javier reached for the hem of your dress, pushing it up, his hand roaming over your bare thigh. You were wearing long white stockings, fastened with a small bow to hold to your thigh. His fingers gently clawed into your firm flesh, full of desire for you. He had always had a weakness for long stockings and he liked the idea of stripping you down to them and making love to you.

His lips detached from yours, rather he let his mouth slide over your throat. Moaning softly, you let your head fall back, enjoying this erotic moment.

"Ahh… Javier…" Your hands claw into his hair as Javier greedily tasted the skin on your throat, gently biting into your flesh…

♦♦♦♦

His beautiful, naked body resembled stunning marble; firm and strong, slender and desirous. His hands slid under the hem of your undergarment that covered your trembling body. Inch by inch he pushed it up, over your waist and stomach, until he had freed your beautiful breasts. Rosy nipples tightened under his gaze. His eyes grew dark with desire and Javier couldn't believe his luck. You lay before him, in the flesh. Beautiful and desirable!

After he had removed your undergarments, he carelessly threw it aside and you lay in the soft sheets dressed only in your white, long stockings. Biting your lips gently, you looked up at Javier, giving him a glimpse between your legs as you opened them for him. You could hear him inhale deeply, trembling with excitement.

"Oh, querida…"

Did you realize how crazy you were driving him? How much he desired you? His hands covered your tits, pressing them together. He lifted them to his lips as he lowered his head and his hair slid over your oversensitive, heated skin, while his mouth swallow one of the stiff nipples, kissing it first and then circling it with his tongue, making you moan with pleasure.

Javier continued, covering your other tit with tender bites. You squirmed helplessly, wishing he would lick your hot, throbbing pussy. To kiss it and give it the attention it needed right now. You could barely stand it anymore, so your hand slipped between your legs and you started caressing yourself. Javier noticed this immediately and he had to grin, rather he let your nipple slide out of his mouth with a smack. Slowly, he slid down on your body. Grabbing your hips, he lifted your hips to finally taste your sweet little pussy after such a long time. Completely captivated by your scent, Javier closed his eyes for a moment and breathed it in. You desperately whispered his name as you felt infinite pleasure at that moment. His tongue parted your folds, swapping between them and finding your clitoris. Slowly, ever so slowly, Javier circled the small, pulsating center of your desire. He alternated licking and sucking on you until he heard you lustfully call his name. It was like a sighing plea to finally take you.

Deeply his tongue plunged into your tight, wet opening, fucking you in a delicious way and you thought you were going to lose your mind.

"Javier…!"

Clutching at the pillow, you threw your head to the side, moaning with pleasure as your inner thighs began to quiver.

Your breasts rose and fell with each breath and Javier's dark eyes, looked up at you. He enjoyed the sight of your beautiful body, the expression of pure bliss on your face. His tongue ran in circular motions over your clit, sometimes faster and then slower. You could barely stand the feeling and you suppressed a loud moan, pressing the back of your hand to your mouth. "Oh my god… ahhh…"

"Ahh… Y/N…"

Javier encircled your swollen pearl and he started sucking on it, stroking your thighs with his hands and as you reached into his hair, a deep growl came from his throat. His cock was perfectly hard and erect, pre-cum dripping from its tip, sliding slowly down his shaft. He could hardly stand it anymore, becoming more energetic in his actions as he also slid his fingers into your opening to fuck you with his fingers.

Briefly Javier had to swallow your nectar to continue and before you could think any further you came with a lustful moan, your back arching and Javier holding you tightly to his mouth so you could ride out your orgasm.

"Mi rosa… you are so beautiful…" he whispered, breathing a kiss on your inner thigh before sliding up to you, his warm, toned body resting on yours.

Javier grabbed his cock and made circular motions with the tip on your clit.

"Look at me, sweetheart…" he whispered, gently turning your face towards him and when you opened your eyes, Javier could see the tears in them. But he could tell that you were just happy at the moment.

"I want to look at you when I make love to you…"

"Javier…"

His words were as sweet as honey, his touches and kisses gentle as a bird's wings.

As his hand sought yours to intertwine your fingers, he guided his cock to your wet opening and you instantly took him in. With a deep, lustful moan on both sides, you looked into each other's eyes, saw the lust in each other's faces. A beautiful and very intimate moment for you.

You clawed almost desperately at his masculine back, almost as if you were afraid he might be taken from you again. But Javier felt the same way. The thought of letting you go again was out of the question for him.

"Mi amor… I love you…"

Your pussy was like velvet and you were hot and so wet… Javier thought he was losing his mind. He began to thrust himself inside you. Slowly at first, for he savored being so deep inside you. His throbbing cock filled you completely. "Ahh… you are so tight and so hot…. hssst… ahhh…" he moaned against your ear and he bit your earlobe. His voice had gone a notch deeper and darker and that made your body tremble with pleasure. His lips kissed your mouth as he moved rhythmically inside you and his scent clouded your senses. He smelled of leather, spicy lavender and tobacco…

The sound of his balls smacking against your wetness filled the room. Enveloped by your scent and your husky, lustful sounds, and after more powerful thrusts from Javier, he felt that he was about to climax and you too felt yourself tingling intensely between your legs. When his hand slipped between your bodies to caress your clit, your climax overtook you. Your body arched lustfully towards Javier and you clawed at his strong arms, seeking help, driving him crazy with the sight of your beautiful body. And finally he squirted his seed deep into your soft pussy, growling lustfully and closing his eyes as he thrust into you, trembling while riding out his climax.

You clung to each other in the soft sheets of your bed, enjoying this precious moment. Panting heavily, you lay on top of each other and Javier had his arms wrapped tightly around your body. You felt so desired, so loved… you had the feeling that you would always find protection in his arms. When his eyes searched your gaze, you smiled lovingly at him and Javier covered your face with tender kisses. Gently he kissed your cheek, your chin, your nose, your eyelids and finally your seductive mouth.

The two of you stayed like that for a few moments; foreheads resting together and looking into each other's eyes, not wanting to lose the feeling of the other. This was a special moment for both of you….

♦♦♦♦

"Where have you been all these years, Javier?" you asked softly as you rested against his chest. It was such a pleasant silence that surrounded you both. The sun's rays fell directly on their naked bodies, mentioning you. The young man gently stroked your arm as he looked up at the ceiling, thinking about where best to start. He had been through a lot in the last five years, had made bad decisions. But after the decline of the gang, he too had been lost. For Javier, everything had been hopeless then.

"I was lost, mi rosa. I had made many, wrong decisions."

You listened to him, snuggling even closer to his chest, gently running your fingers over his skin.

"After the decline, I got into one shit situation after another. I didn't… didn't care about anything anymore, you know? I stole, killed to survive. I was just a shadow of my former self."

You could understand him well, and you knew Javier. He had a guilty conscience for all those things, but they were in the past now and you had to let them rest sometime. You were lucky to have Abigail and John as support. Otherwise, you would have been in a bad way after Micah and Dutch brought everyone to ruin.

"But I was given another chance. And this man is really like a father to me. He's given me a lot, shown me a lot."

He was talking about his boss, who had finally persuaded him to seek you out.

Curiously you looked up at him and when you saw Javier smile you knew everything was right. Giving you a kiss on the forehead, he sighed contentedly.

" I'm very happy that you live in this beautiful place, Y/N. I'm happy that you're doing well and living a good life."

Tears came to your eyes at his words. It had been half a life without him, but his words touched you. It only confirmed how much he loved you.

"Without Abigail and John, I don't think I would have made it as easily as I did."

Javier was now very curious when you mentioned their name. Javier often thought of John.

"They were supportive of me, Javier. I was with them for almost two years until finally I was able to build my own life."

But there was one thing you didn't mention. A trauma that you hadn't really dealt with until today, and if Javier found out, it would break his heart. Only Abigail, John and little Jack knew about that. Something that had shaken you all to the core. You immediately shook off that thought, because it wasn't time to tell Javier yet. Was there even a time for it?

"I'm just glad we found each other again, darling," you whispered as you nestled your face into the crook of his neck and took a deep breath of his scent.

"I love you, Y/N."

His arms wrapped protectively around you and neither of you had the intention to stand up. Time seemed to have stopped for you.

You had been stranded, left by the wayside and yet, your lives had moved forward. Javier had managed to get his life together, just like you. You both earned your money with hard work and you were proud of it. You were more grown up, had realized at some point that life as an outlaw was not a romantic affair. No one knew better than you, because you had gone through it…

♦♦♦♦

You stood in the kitchen, your thoughts giving you no peace. A bit nervously you chewed your thumb, looking out of the window, lost. Dark clouds were gathering, the thunder was already rumbling in the distance.

"Is everything all right, honey?"

You seemed a bit sad this morning and Javier wondered what the reason could be. There was indeed a reason, but you couldn't talk about it. At least not yet. You had just found each other and you didn't want a shadow to be cast over your love.

"Yes. I'm just a little sick to my stomach."

Loving as Javier was, he gently stroked your cheek and smiled encouragingly at you.

"You should lie down for a bit. Drink some chamomile tea, that will calm your stomach."

You gave him a warm smile, rather kissing him tenderly.

"Maybe you're right."

"I have to go now. My client doesn't like to wait."

"Okay, Javi. I'll see you tonight."

He gave you another deep, intimate kiss but instead of pulling away from you, he intensified the kiss, his body snuggling against yours and pressing you against the counter, making you gasp in pleasure. Instantly, you wrapped your arms around his neck, smiling into the kiss.

"Javi?"

"Mmm…"

His lips roamed over your neck, and he knew exactly where to kiss you so you'd be all his.

"Don't you have to go to work?" you asked with an amused undertone.

"Mhm… I still have a few minutes," he whispered against your skin and without giving it much thought, he grabbed your thighs and lifted you onto the counter. With a seductive smile, you pulled Javier by his collar while your beautiful legs wrapped around his waist.

"I just can't keep my hands off you," he purred low and excited as he slid his hand under your skirt to feel your skin.

"Javi…"

You became instantly wet and that was just from his voice, his touch and his closeness. There was nothing wrong with performing a quick fuck in the kitchen, was there?

But your plan was thwarted when you heard a wagon. Javier looked out the window and saw someone approaching.

"Who is that?"

It could only be John. She looked up at Javier.

"Let's go outside. That must be John."

"John?"

What was John doing here? Out of nowhere like this? Javier frowned but followed, and he was more than curious to know how these circumstances fit together.

"Hey, Y/N! I brought you some stuff from town. And…"

John's smile evaporated as Javier suddenly appeared behind you. He thought he was seeing a ghost and he had to realize Javier was really here. John shook his head barely noticeably, closing his eyes briefly and frowning.

"What are you doing here?"

"Hola, John…"

"I said, what the hell are you doing here?"

And John sounded rather irritated. Instantly, he climbed off his wagon, made his way straight to the two of you. You had guessed that this reunion wouldn't be easy. But that John would react so negatively to Javier was surprising even to you.

"I could ask you the same thing, amigo."

Javier didn't appreciate being approached without any respect. John was angry, yes, he could understand. But if he was going to act foolish, well, so could Javier.

"I'll take care of, Y/N. Unlike you, Javier!"

Javier swallowed hard. Yes, John had been right. He hadn't been there for you, but he was now, and he would stay.

"You better get out of here, Javier! You have no business being here!"

"What? Says who? You?"

"Enough!"

The whole thing was getting too silly for you. With a stern look you eyed John, standing in front of Javier.

"This is my house, my property! I decide who can come here and who can't! Is that clear, John!"

"Y/N! Do you really think you can trust that snake? After all he's done!"

"Oh, come on John! Don't act like that! You let Abigail and Jack down back then! You let us all down that time!"

Now John was the one who had nothing to say about it. The two men paused and you were glad that neither of them had anything to say at the moment.

"We all made mistakes in our past. But talking about it doesn't undo anything!"

"Y/N, you may be right, but Javier sided with Micah! He is partly to blame for Arthur's death!"

"That's enough John! You better leave now!"

But John didn't listen at all, he went straight for Javier, stood in front of him, but Javier didn't back away, nor did he let John intimidate him.

"You betrayed us all."

With his head held high, he looked John in the eye. There was something dangerous in his gaze.

"I saved your life more than once, hijo de puta!"

But John was so pissed, he wasn't even listening to what Javier had to say to him.

"When Y/N needed you the most, you weren't there! You abandoned her and your child!"

It hit Javier, but also you, like a thunderbolt when John spoke those words. And at that very moment, there was a deep and powerful clap of thunder. Within a few seconds, the first raindrops were already falling to the earth. Daughter? How? But… For Javier, a world just collapsed. He was completely confused and you could see it in his face. His eyes slid across the ground, trying to comprehend what John had just said.

"Your daughter would have needed a father! Your woman would have needed you!"

You couldn't believe John had the thoughtlessness to say such a thing to Javier. Sobbing, you put your hand to your mouth to suppress your tears as best you could. Eventually everything came to light, but it had definitely been too soon. Way too soon and you would never forgive John for that. Closing your eyes, you let the first tears run free. The rain became heavier and soon wetted your entire face, mixing with your tears.

Javier was so shocked by John's statement that he was speechless. He opened his mouth to say something, but no words passed his lips. His eyes became glassy and he cast a shocked look in your direction. When he saw your tears and your agonized expression, he was aware that John was telling the truth.

"Y/N… no…"

"Fuck you Javier! Do her a favor and fuck off again!"

Where was his child? You didn't tell him about it! Where the hell was his daughter?

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novacainenovacainenovacaine · 10 months ago

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Breaking news—the love interest role in Claire White's latest blockbuster finally has a star, and it's none other than Catalina De La Cruz, pictured above, the youngest offspring of Hollywood moguls. Brace yourselves for a wild ride as Catalina, usually seen in their parents' flicks, takes on a meatier role in one of next year's most hyped movies.

But hold the popcorn—whispers on the red carpet suggest Catalina's previous filmography is more "meh" than marvellous.

Is this casting coup the pinnacle of Hollywood nepotism, or will Catalina flip the script and prove they're a force to be reckoned with? Love them or hate them, one thing's for sure: this star-studded spectacle is about to kick off, and only time will spill the juiciest deets straight from the set.

So, grab your shades, folks, because this Hollywood rollercoaster is just getting warmed up and PinkCelebTea will report every step of the way—you know how it is!

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NEXT UP: Our insiders spill the tea—L Alvarez ain't exactly doing cartwheels about acting alongside what they're dubbing an 'untalented and undeserving' co-star. Trouble behind the scenes already?

NOTE: THIS STORY DOES NOT BELONG TO ME NOR ARE THE PICTURES MINE!

I'm new to this so sorry if I'm doing it wrong, but just wanted to show off my OC Catalina or Lina for short de la Cruz for this IF that's been on my mind since I read the intro last night @andscene-if

🌹List of facts:🌹

She's an Aries, her birthday is on the 11th of April.

She's really down to earth and is aware of the privilege she has grown up with, so when she does something she takes it 100% seriously and she's not afraid to work hard.

Lina is a homebody, so if she's not doing collaborations or modelling, she'll be at home, reading or cooking. She loves trying out new recipes.

She's definitely going to put her all into this movie role and she'll prove to all the haters and anyone who has doubted her abilities that she has what it takes.

Lina is a people person, so her plan is to hopefully get her cast to warm up to her through her baking and just good vibes.😊

🌹Instagram:🌹 (template creds to: @helloiamrenata)

My OC is planning on romancing Z Lao or Phoenix Ryder😍

Big thanks to the author for sharing, I really can't wait to play the demo!🥰

#interactive fiction #to play #my oc #fun facts #fun stuff #❤️❤️❤️#and scene #and scene if #andscene if

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dizziedupthegirl · 3 months ago

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🪞, 🤍, 🌹, & 🦢

thanks for the ask!!!

bc im so obsessed with this one rn and him (tim riggins)

for my fnl dr:

🪞 - what are some photos that depict your relationship with your s/o?

(all taken from pinterest. also a hc i have is that he secretly LOVES the notebook- hence the first pic)

🤍 - what are your love languages VS. your s/o’s? How do you show theirs and how do they show yours?

mine is acts of service and words of affirmation. his are physical touch and quality time.

one thing we’ll do to show them is just go on drives around town and talk to each other. stop and get some food on the way too. <33

🌹 - what is something you have taught your s/o (or will teach) and what is something they have taught you?

ive taught, or tried to teach him how to do hair. (tried meaning im pretty bad at it) but he is SO GOOD. he can do a mean french braid.

he’s taught me how to change a tire and basic car maintenance things. it all started after one night my bronco broke down on my way home and he found me on the side of the road lol

🦢 - what do you see in the future for you and your s/o?

given im halfway through the show and unsure how life turns out for tim, i hope in my dr were all good haha. i see us both going to college and then possibly getting married and having a family of sorts.

~ asks are open! pick from a prompt here, or here, or here! and all my drs can be found here 🥰

#dizzie shifts #dizzies asks #fnl #friday night lights #tim riggins #reality shifting #shiftblr #shifting #shifting realities #reality shifter #shifting community #shifters #shifting blog #shifter #shift #shifting reality #desired reality

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bloodhoundluke · 1 year ago

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roses

pairing: luke hemmings x painter/digital illustrator! reader (fc: sabrina carpenter) description: luke has a instagram crush on Y/N. without knowing personally, he suggests that Y/N should paint him and the rest is history.

a/n: hi lovelies! 💚 here's another instagram blurb. this one was requested 🦋 if u have any face claim or storyline suggestions for the next instagram blurb please tell me, i'd love to hear them :)

+ the digital drawing of luke is NOT MINE, it's by @ monimau2000 on instagram!! please check their work, they are so talented 💚

yourinstagram

Liked by yourbestfriend, lukehemmings and 9,493 others

yourinstagram Bring me roses & I'll promise I'll melt.

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yourbestfriend Too beautiful for this world ❤️‍🩹

yourfriend1 Y/N stop 😭💙💙

lukehemmings 🤩

yourfriend2 😍🥰

yourinstagram

Liked by yourbestfriend, lukehemmings and 10,193 others

yourinstagram Gooood dayyyy. I'm very uninspired at the moment. Suggest something that I should paint? ❣️

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yourbestfriend My toes

yourinstagram Nope.

lukehemmings Do you paint people?

yourinstagram Yes!

lukehemmings Ok cool

yourinstagram Any suggestions?

lukehemmings Hmmm...Me?

yourinstagram Well, challenge accepted 👀

lukehemmings

Liked by yourinstagram, calumhood and 139,963 others

lukehemmings Coffee's good in the UK.

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calumhood But not as good as in Oz

lukehemmings Facts

ashtonirwin Enjoy!

michaelclifford cool

yourworkgram

Liked by lukehemmings, michaelclifford and 28,594 others

yourworkgram Not a painting, but a digital drawing. I dig it. Thanks Luke for being today's model!

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lukehemmings So cool! 🤘🏻🖤

michaelclifford awesome!! 🤍

y/n.fan01 Love your style of drawing. Amazing 😍

5sos Wow 🤩

yourinstagram

Liked by 5sos, lukehemmings and 16,346 others

yourinstagram I remember the 🌹 on your shirt

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5sos 👀

yourinstagram 🧐

yourbestfriend g-o-r-g-e-o-u-s 💖

yourfriend2 the coolest 💙

yourinstagram

Liked by lukehemmings, michaelclifford and 19,394 others

yourinstagram Daycare 🐶

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sfdsn PETUNIA????

DSKFKKDS oh my god!!! is that's luke's dog??

yourbestfriend 🥺🧡

lukehemmings

Liked by yourinstagram, michaelclifford and 201,963 others

lukehemmings Photo dumB

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yourinstagram

Liked by lukehemmings, 5sos and 86,045 others

yourinstagram Moments.

Comments have been turned off.

5sos.updates

Liked by loveroflukey, lrhupdates and 240 others

5sos.updates Fans saw Y/N arriving at the 5SOS venue today. They apparently asked Y/N about Luke and Y/N couldn't help but smile.

View all 29 comments

lukeswildflower I LOVE Y/N ALREADY

cherrymalum so they might be together??? are they??

5sos.updates It's wildly speculated that they are, but they haven't confirmed it yet.

loverof5sos adorable 😭

lukehemmings

Liked by lukehemmings, 5sos and 210,341 others

lukehemmings Tour's been amazing so far 🖤

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yourinstagram

Liked by lukehemmings, 5sos and 89,456 others

yourinstagram Petition to become 5SOS' new lead singer.

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ashtonirwin Signed.

yourinstagram Thanks for the endless support.

lukehemmings I get it. She's so much better than me.

5sos ✅

calumhood Yeah please let's do that, the one we have now sucks

yourinstagram Totally

lukehemmings 😪

lukehemmings

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lukehemmings My beating heart belongs to you ❤️

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yourinstagram 🥹😭🦋💖

yourbestfriend Cuties 🧡

vicious5sos luke you can't just drop these photos and pretend it's okay 😭❤️‍🩹

calm.lrh2 i swear i am having a heart attack

caramelcal I LOVE THEM SO MUCH IT HURTS

calumhood Get a room jeez

yourinstagram Calm down dude ☹️

lukehemmings 🤣🤣

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battyaboutbooksreviews · 7 months ago

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🦇 Late Bloomer Book Review 🦇

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

❓ #QOTD What's your favorite type of flower? ❓ 🦇 After winning the lottery, Opal Devlin puts all her money in a failing flower farm, only to find an angry (albeit gorgeous) Pepper Boden already living there. Though she's unable to find her grandmother's will, Pepper claims she's the rightful owner of Thistle and Bloom Farms. While they agree to cohabitate, Opal and Pepper clash at every turn. Can something softer blossom between these polar opposites, allowing a new dream to take root and grow?

💜 Oh. My. (Sappho.) Goddess. You may think you know Mazey Eddings' writing style, but I assure you, you do not. Many of us read The Plus One and/or Tily in Technicolor last year, but truly, Eddings has far exceeded herself with this one. As a neurodiverse author, Eddings' stories often have some element of neurodiversity / mental health, shining a light on the different ways people's brains work while embracing those differences through beautiful, realistic characters. Opal and Pepper are no different, both on the spectrum yet unique in their behaviors and view of the world. These women are not predictable, pre-programmed components of a story; they are ever-blooming, learning how to plant roots alongside one another, share sunlight, and rise despite being different species. Both plants, growing and adapting to different elements, yet very much the same. While Opal and Pepper have always struggled to fit in with the world around them, they manage to cultivate a safe, healthy garden for one another.

💜 This is one of those overwhelming, layered, awe-inspiring sapphic stories that will tug at your heartstrings long after you read it. Eddings' language leaps off the page, making it a little reminiscent of One Last Stop (be still, my little sapphic heart). I've beyond annotated Late Bloomer, when I'm usually selective about choosing quotes. You don't just see love blossom between these two women; you feel it. It made me smile, laugh, get all messy and misty-eyed. As I said, neither woman is predictable. Opal feels directionless at the story's start, allowing her (fake) best friend and (on/off) ex to step all over her. I expected her to be the wallflower, especially with the BITE we see from Pepper (pun unintended) in her first chapter, but the two balance each other out. When Pepper feels uncertain or anxious, Opal steps forward, bold and unwavering. When Opal begins to crumble, Pepper holds her up. They support each other, never allowing the other to wilt.

💙 Unfortunately, this book relies heavily on miscommunication. Both women are eager to hide their real feelings at the risk of scaring the other. That lack of communication continues until almost the last chapter.

🦇 Recommended for fans of One Last Stop and Imogen, Obviously. Side note: please, please read the author's note. Good goddess.

✨ The Vibes ✨ 🌼 Neurodivergency/Autism Spectrum 🌸 Sapphic Romance 🌷 Grief/Healing 🌹 Forced Proximity ⚡ Spicy/First Time 🪻 Cottage Core Vibes 🪻 One Bed ⚡ Touch Her and You Die 🌹 Dual POV 🌷 Miscommunication 🌸 Flower Competition 🌻 Grumpy/Sunshine

🦇 Major thanks to the author @mazeyeddings and publisher for providing an ARC of this book via Netgalley. 🥰 This does not affect my opinion regarding the book. #LateBloomer

💬 Quotes ❝ I’m constantly trying to define myself, to fit nicely and neatly into the boxes and spaces I attempt to occupy. All I’ve ever really wanted to do was belong. Somewhere. Anywhere. ❞ ❝ Slowly, she leans toward me, and my heart pounds so violently in my chest that my head swims. Is she . . . It almost seems like she’s going to press that smile to my mouth. Teach me how it tastes. ❞ ❝ I gave up perfection in any other aspect of my life long ago. It’s simply not possible with a brain like mine. But my art is different; it’s the better version of me, the one I wish people could know me by. ❞ ❝ Ah. There’s the you I missed. ❞ ❝ I used to stress over finding a label that fit me. Lesbian. Bisexual. Pan. Demi . . . I’ve filtered through them all many times over, none ever feeling quite right. Just say queer and move on with your life, Diksha finally told me late one night after what was probably my sixth sexual identity crisis of my early twenties. But what does that mean? I’d wailed, draining more boxed wine into my plastic cup. My brain loves order and labels and concise frameworks to understand things, and not knowing where I fit feels unbearable. It means you’re you, and only you get to decide who you like and when you like them, Tal had said from their chair in the corner. The name of your feelings isn’t anyone’s business but yours. ❞ ❝ But instead, she reaches out to me— opening her hand like a flower unfurling its petals to the sun. I stare at it. The ink stains and calluses and chipped nails and bitten cuticles. For a moment, that hand looks like a second chance. ❞ ❝ Fuck anything and anyone that made you have to survive instead of live. You deserve a life so peaceful it feels deliciously boring. A life filled with flowers and sunny days and people that show you all the time that you’re valued and worthy. You deserve it all.” ❞ ❝ “Her poems spoke softly— as intimately as confessions between lovers—about the terrible, wonderful ache of being in love.” ❞ ❝ Messy and radiant and ours. ❞

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theshimadaslovers · 1 year ago

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Hiii!!! How are you?

First I want to say that I love everything you write, and that I am a complete SIMP of your story "Cakes for Reaper".

And second, I wanted to know if you would be willing to write an Inspired By Art with this image...

If you don't want to write it thats okay too, I send you a lot of hugs and kisses🥰❤

AAAWWW Thank you so much! I saw your repost! This is so sweet! ❤❤ And I love that pic so much ;^; I'm so glad that IBA is working! 🌹💪

Obs; I GOT 2 VERSIONS (Maybe more?) FOR THAT IBA 😈

IBA - INSPIRED BY ART

VERSION 1

A FRIEND

Summary: Genji is trying to make Hanzo make new friends after got into Overwatch. Both were sitting at the garden of a big house in a mountain that Overwatch stays on the weekends when there's no mission.

Hanzo- I don't need friends, Genji. Let just meditate, please!

Genji- But you neeed!

Hanzo- But I don't want too!

Genji- I don't fucking care if you want or not! You neeeeed!

Hanzo- Friends doesn't help in anything! How many times you came to me as kid complaining about your "friends"?

Genji- Hey! Some of them was nice!

Hanzo- "some" of them?

Genji- Everybody had once a fake friend! The FFF!

Hanzo- ....F...F...F?

Genji- Yeah, is for Fucking Fake Friend.

Hanzo- *sighs* right...friends are headaches.

Genji- Hey! What about...Tracer?

Hanzo- Talk to much.

Genji- Mercy?

Hanzo- Just talk about medicine.

Genji- Wha...? Ok...aaah, Brigitte?

Hanzo- Nice but...wait, why you're only picking the girls?!

Genji- Ok ok! Rein?

Hanzo- Too loud! Energetic!

Genji- If you keep looking only to those things you'll never have one! This is obvious! Cassidy?

Hanzo- Can you just stop?!

You- Guys? *looking at both holding a tray* Are you guys fighting again?

Genji- No! He's just a stubborn!

Hanzo- *frozed after looking at you*

You- *laughs* Of course he's a stubborn, Genji, he's your brother *approaches and put the tray with tea and cake between them* You're the same.

Genji- I'm not stubborn, come on! *silence* just a little.

You- Is a family thing *chuckles sitting together* I bring some cake that I made it...by the way, what are you guys talking about?

Hanzo- Genji want me to have friends...*roll eyes*

You- You don't have?

Genji- He said that "No! I don't want friends! I hate people!" *making a funny impression*

Hanzo- I don't sound like that and I didn't said that I hate people!

You- *chuckles* I'm not your friend, Han?

Hanzo- I...I don't want to sound rude but...I don't know if I should.

Genji- You know what? Deal with him, y/n...*pick up the cake and the tea* I'll eat in peace. *get out of there* What I stubborn dickhead....

You- *looking him go* So....*back to Hanzo* Why are you so afraid?

Hanzo- I'm not afraid...I just don't need that friendship stuff.

You- Well...you're a lonely wolf, aren't you? *smile*

Hanzo- Hm...I guess I am.

You- You know a lonely wolf can't survive for too long, right? He needs to find a family.

Hanzo- *sighs* I survived until now...I like my solitude.

You- I like mine too...*sit close to him looking at the view* But, sometimes I need someone to spend time together, gossiping...make fun, playing games... is cool. Is not with everyone, of course, is only with who makes me comfortable.

Hanzo- ...*look at you* Like me?

You- Yes.

Hanzo- But...why?

You- Because your aura is good and comfortable to stay around.

Hanzo- *chuckles* Sometimes, you sound like Zenyatta.

You- *laughs* Maybe I'm spending too much time with him!

Hanzo- Keep spending...he's a good master. So...I'm...a comfortable zone?

You- For me, yes. You're a good man, Han. I hope someday you have that knowledge of yourself.

Hanzo- Good...*sighs* After all I've done, how could you?

You- Hanzo, this is past...*sighs looking at him* Stays where it belongs, in the past. The memories, traumas, can be worked out.

Hanzo- I was a terrible human being, y/n! I killed people and my bro-! *looked away closing his eyes* I harmed so many innocents...I was in a mafia! My family...my reputation...my honour...

You- Dosen't matter now, Shimada...What matter is what those traumas made you be who you're now! You changed...you fought for so long. You deserve to be loved. *hold his hand making him look at you a little lost in how to react* You. Are. A. Good. Man.

Hanzo- What makes me that man?

You- *smiles* You want me to say it? Well...you love to help and care, you're gently, patient, helpful, a golden heart man. Is a man that, I knew, since the first time I saw you, I knew how broken that man was. You're broken, Han, but doesn't mean that you're villain or good, you're just human. Be broken is being human.

Hanzo- *looking at you listening to every word*

You- The Hanzo Shimada of ten years ago is not the same one now. Everything that happened there, doesn't matter now.

Hanzo- But...I killed my own brother...*you could see his eyes watering for your surprise*

You- It wasn't you...You told me your side of the story and I promise one thing to you, Han, my friend... it wasn't you. They did that, they must die for that! You didn't have a choice.

Hanzo- I...! *look away*

You- *smiles* Hey, you trusted me to tell your story, you darkest secrets...this is friendship, you know?

Hanzo- *look at you again*

You- Why me, Han? You could have told that to anybody.

Hanzo- *silence*...I...trust you. That's all.

You- Are you sure?

Hanzo- ....*cleans throat* You...Is...! Is just you. I like you.

You- *giggles* I like you too, Hanzo, that's why you're my friend! And...trust me, ok? *put the hand on his shoulder* I'll be here even in your darkest times. I'll never disappoint you.

Hanzo- *blush looking at you* Arigatou...*sighs* I didn't knew that you think like that.

You- I only express my feelings and thoughts when needed.

Hanzo- When I...said...that I like you I...I mean it. *blushing harder and hold the cloth of his pants*

You- Oh...! *blush* Wh-what? Really? Wait! You mean...! Lo...ve?

Hanzo- I guess so...?

You- Well, maybe is just a admiration?

Hanzo- Maybe...*looking away*

You- So...when you look at me, what comes in your mind?

Hanzo- *sighs and close his eyes* Hm... I can't tell, is a mix of feelings. I can't pick one.

You- *laughs* It's ok...but I like you too, Hanzo, for real *kiss his cheek* Remember, I'll be here, always *gets up* And eat the cake.

Hanzo- *looking at the view while you go away*... *look at the cake...it was his favorite one, the white strawberry cake* ....!!! *hide his burning blushed face km his hands(pic)* She's so cute...! Why my heart is so stupidly fast?! I want to marry her! Oh my dragons...! I hate her for that....! *sighs and go back to normal* ....*giggling and slap his face* Stop it! Idiot! *silence and look at the cake making him smile again* Well...I guess I finally gain something meaningful in my life...love. *pick up the cake*

I can't wait for the version 2 💪 hope you like it!

#she/her #overwatch #overwatch x reader #fem!reader #overwatch fanfiction #overwatch x you #hanzo shimada #hanzo x you #genji shimada

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leovenuslatina · 3 months ago

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Omgggg love of my life hiiii😏😏😏. First I loveeee how no tmi you are tbh that’s what I love esp when im looking for freaky readings 😼 and YOU DESERVE EVERY SINGLE FOLLOWER!!! My question is about my fs so basically anything you can channel like what would he want me to know or idk tea on him bahaaaa,it can be 18+ btw ❤️ thank you so much and take care of yourself 🥰

omgg hi thank thank you so much for joining and the compliments MWAH 😘

THIS IS 18+MDNI

Your messages

i’d take all ur pain away

i like of better when you cover up

I hate fighting with but i love the way we make up

i don’t like ppl looking at what’s mine

i hope i can make all your wildest dreams come true

i like picking you up and doing you like mid air😩

those knee high boots you wear are so hot

anything you wear is sexy

red is definitely your best color ♥️🌹

i’ll bring you lots of red roses

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

tip ur reader 💋

#answered #1k ask game #mdni

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kittykittyanon · 9 months ago

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Kitty kitty bo bitty banana fanna funfetti!! 🎉🌟 Woooo!! *pops a whole bunch of edible party streamers!! [psst! they taste like creamsicles and chocolate! 😋🍊🍫]*

Aaaaaaa, so. Folds hands in front of me like a businessman ladden with a suppressed genre of woe. i missed the timeframe of your birthday wishes, and I feel sads about it :(( but mostly 💢annoyed💢 because as aforementioned:

🗣i had an entire coded date reminder of it in my calendar. and that b didn't GO OFF.🗣

maybe it's these motorola phones mayne,,, i'm bouta switch over to Samsung–

BUT ANYWAYSSSUUUHH. Never mind that :') I'm here now!! Let's talk about the real star of the show here. Gazes upon you fondly, tangerines and little bubbles and hearts suddenly surrounding my aura as I take in your existence. 🧡

Oh my Kitkat, no words can begin to express the absolute adoration in which I hold for you. I know we haven't known each other long! But the familiarity and warmth you have displayed to be and continue to really makes it feel like we've been friends for five-ever!! [*leans in and whispers* because that's longer than forever /silly!! (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ )]

I never expected to become friends with such a baby face angel such as yourself, but that's usually how the bestest friendships are forged, no? By spontaneous combustion!! We're a heartbeat explosion of starry stuff and soul sister love in the endless sky!! ໒꒰ྀི ๑ ´ ˘ ` ू ꒱ྀིა

What I'm saying is, I love you and everything you stand for. And I am squishing you in every cinnamoroll hug you could ever feel, ever!! Thank you for coming into my orbit, and I can only hope on all the stars in the universe that my own has even a sliver of a positive and love-filled impact on yours as it did mine. 🫶🫶

/) /) (\ (\ ( . . ) ( . . ) ( づ♡⊂ ) 🫧💗✨ <<< look!! it's us!! yay!! (੭˃ᴗ˂)੭🫂❤️

You're just a sweet little wonder and I am so so endlessly grateful to call you my friend. My sweet little baby sis!! Just know that I love you so so much!! I love you!!!! Happy happy birthday, cute little orange blossom cupcake! And cheers to one of the greatest days in the history of EVER!! 🧡🥂✨

🌟。💕。🤗 🍀 。🎁 。🎉 🍾 🌟 ✨。＼｜／。🌺 🎉 Happy 🥰 🎈 🍸 Birthday ! 🥂 💜。／｜＼。💎 。🍀。 🌹。🎉。 🌟。 😊。 🎶

♥♥♫♪Happy Birthday to you ♪♫•¨•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•¨•♫♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪♫•¨•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•¨•♫♪ Happy Birthday dear Kit Kit!!!!! ♥♥♫♪ Happy Birthday to you!! ♪♫•¨•.¸¸♥ ♪♫•¨•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•¨•♫♪ ♪♫•¨•.¸¸♥ ¸¸.•¨•♫♪

[oh! and that cute little orange divider is courtesy of one @plutism !! it's so you, is it not? ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧ got major ' you ' vibes from it. tho it may just be me!! teehee 😚😁]

((uwah!!! this was sent 10th february!!!!! i saw it but i didn't have time to respond (つω`｡)))

AW FUCK YEAH EDIBLE STREAMERS LETS GO!!!!! (briefly, you watch me jump to eat them out of the air. ...i miss, several times.)

[ueueueee!! IT IS LONGER THAN FOREVER!!]

[omigosh!! it's literally us!!!!!]

AWWWHWHAGAWSAEEWEWWWWW THE INTERWEAVING OF SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTIONS TO REFERENCE MY EXPLOSIVE TENDENCIES WAAAHHHHH I LOVE YOUUU!!! UWOOOHHHH YOU REALLY THOUGHT OF EVERYTHINGGG!! 。゜゜(´Ｏ`) ゜゜。。゜゜(´Ｏ`) ゜゜。

and just to put the silliness away for a bit,, you never ever EVER have to hope you had an impact on me!! because undeniably,, you did. and you still do.

never doubt that you've had a positive influence on me, zeep. i have never, and never will regret meeting you. (*˘︶˘*).｡.:*♡

*whisper whisper* c'mere,, c'mere!!! i'll tell you a secret,, but you gotta keep it TIP TOP PRIVATE okay soldier!?!??!! i love you. like,, genuinely. i am proud and absolutely delighted to call you my friend. legitimately, no joke,, just thinking of you makes me happy. the impact of your words and your interactions and even your very presence in and of itself is something i will never be able to put into words. you fill the little hole in me,, oddly shaped like a sister and a close friend all mixed up into a cacophony of something utterly fond and incomprehensible in the best way possible. i cradle you close to my heart and smooth my hand over your head,, you brightened up my life without even knowing it. and me, personally,, i think that just goes to show how amazing you are, filled with joy and determination and courage i can't and couldn't seem to see the end of, even if i tried. it'll be okay, zeep. you are funny, and smart, and a sunshine in every sense of the word, even when you're not doing anything at all. you don't know how loved you are. may that little fire in you keep burning for the rest of however long you want it to, may life bring you good things. because you deserve them. all of them.

i wish for the best for you,,, and that you'll get everything you've ever wanted in the whole wide world,, that you'll get loooaaaads of *totally not stolen /j* money,, that you'll get to live the life you want and sleep well at night!! may you be covered in friendly purring cats and many, many oranges you sweet soul!! RAAAAHHHH!! *okay whisper over!!*

thanks for letting me bump into you like a silly jellyfish in the middle of a deep sea exhibit,, zeepie!! I LOVE YOU TOOO!!! (≧◡��) ♡ (≧◡≦) ♡ (≧◡≦) ♡

[OOOOH!!! it's so silly!! very bright and verrryyy orange!! considering my whole blog theme is a mix of warm colors leaning on orange,, i get that!! very silly,, very kitty!!!!!]

love,, the kitty kitty anon that invaded your inbox ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

#zeepie beepie!!! zeepie deepie!!!!#kittykitty treasures #MY BIRTHDAYYY!!!#kittykitty interactions #kittykitty asks

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bennet-fern · 7 months ago

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Good for you moving on!!

🥰🥰🥰 yeah I’m loving this healing era of mine 💝💓💕💘💗🌹🌸🌸🌸💐🌺🌻🌼🪷🪻🌻🌻

After deleting all 1,895 pictures of him I actually have so much more storage on my phone now so WIN FOR ME 😍🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

#🌿 answers #unreality

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rosemary-morgan · 1 year ago

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Javier Escuella X F.Reader - It's never to late to repent (Part 2)

(Pictures found on pinterest/google. That one with Javier is mine. Collage made by me 🌺)

Many thanks to @fangirl-ramblings 🖤 she has been beta reading for me 🌹

The second chapter is online 🥰 thanks to all who read and like my story 🐝🌺 I hope you will enjoy the second chapter too!

@rose-of-black-blood @livingdeadgirly

If anyone of you want to be tagged to not miss the newest chapter, please let me know 🙏

👉Read Part 1 /Part 3 / Part 4

Warning: a little angsty, broken hearts and their effects, hints of depression!

Summary: Javier is trying to escape his past, while you still have the hope of seeing him again one day. But the loneliness and pain of a broken heart keeps pulling you back to reality. This never-ending pain just doesn't seem to go away, and you try to suppress it as much as you can…

Javier Escuella X F.Reader - It's never to late to repent (Part 2)

Javier sighed softly while sitting by the fire and sharpening the blade of his knife. The pleasant tranquility of nature surrounded him. The soft croaking of the crickets was like a chorus in unison.

Many things were going through Javier's mind, he thought about the turn his life had taken since Dutch's downfall, the downfall of his family. After Javier lost all his trust in Dutch, he lost himself. He had traveled a lot, trying to cope with the pain and the loss of his family, but he had fallen into one shit situation into another. But at some point Javier had realized that real life was different. He had realized that it had been time to come to rest, to earn his money with decent work. It was not a life of luxury that Javier lived. He lived in a small hut, a bit away from the city center. This was the best he could get in the area, yet it was possible for him to sleep in a bed, something that had been impossible for him for decades. His job was making furniture, engraving it. He had a talent for that kind of thing and his boss liked what he saw. In the last few months, Javier had made great progress. There was a customer in Saint Denis who wanted to see his skills and so Javier was asked to visit that customer. Well… then you came into the picture. Suddenly you were there, in Saint Denis. Javier had avoided this cursed city for years, for he had not come to terms with the bank robbery that had gone wrong in 1899. It had been the beginning of the end.

Javier would never be able to forget how young Lenny had been lying in his own blood. Shot by Pinkertons. Or Hosea who had been a father figure to all of them. A man who had taught him so many things. Guarma was also a dark chapter in his life. He had been tortured there and that had left its mark on his psyche.

Seeing you was the happiest moment for him in years. Knowing that you were alive was an incredible relief for Javier. Yet you seem so far away from him. How could he ever come face to face with you? After he had sent you to hell because, unlike him, you had realized the truth. God, he wanted you so much. Javier suffered like a dog without you. All these years he had been as miserable as you. Living apart from you was a torture for him!

Javier put his knife aside to pull out a piece of jewelry from his vest pocket. It was a necklace, with a medallion. He opened it and looked at your photograph. After all these years, he still had it with him. It was the only thing he had left of you. How many sleepless nights had he had? He couldn't even count them. Nights in which he had looked at your beautiful picture and guilt had eaten him up.

"Y/N… Mi rosa…"

He clasped the medallion with his hand, closing his eyes as he did so, trying to suppress the pain in his heart, but he had never been able to do that before either.

“Mi amor… nunca he dejado de amarte” (I’ve never stopped loving you)

Maybe you were married? Had children? Javier didn't know. Did he even want to know? See you with another man by your side? Probably not!

But this uncertainty would kill him! Making him extremely restless with these thoughts! He sighed in annoyance, started to wriggle his leg, his whole body moving as he did so. He hated the thought of seeing you with another man! At some point it became so unbearable for him that he got on his horse and went for a night ride. He needed a clear head now, he needed to sort out his thoughts…

♦♦♦♦

You looked at yourself in the mirror, really liking how the new dress looked on you. It's been a long time since you last treated yourself. You were actually only working to earn your salary, and had often forgotten to do something good for you. Therefore, it came in handy that the train connection had broken down and had forced you to stay in Saint Denis yesterday. With a smile you pulled the fabric over your shoulders, looking at your skin and how the dress flatters your figure. It was a dark green dress, or emerald green as the seller had called it. Actually, you had no idea what occasion you would wear this dress to, but you had liked it so much that you wanted it. Of course, you could have sewn one for yourself, but you still had orders waiting and you couldn't just let them wait.

"I could wear it… wear it tonight?"

You looked thoughtfully in the mirror as you adjusted your dress. You knew about a performance at the theater. It would be the perfect opportunity to wear this dress. So why not? What was wrong with a young woman going to the theater alone? You had done everything alone for the last five years, so you were used to it, along with the stares from the people, since it was rather unusual for a young woman to sit down alone in a restaurant, or to go into a theater. You still had to admit that it often hurt to see couples. Couples walking through the park holding hands. People looking at each other in love while sitting in a restaurant and letting their food get cold because they didn't care about what was going on around them. You had once felt that feeling too. That feeling of love and happiness. Oh, how you wanted to experience that again…

Your gaze wandered to the ground as your thoughts searched for Javier. You couldn't help it, but sometimes this man just crept into your mind. There was nothing you could do about those memories, even though it hurt so much that very moment. Loneliness has become a bitter companion in your life. And the more you thought about it, the more you fell into sadness. Now, in those moments when you were not among people, those were the most difficult moments for you because you had the feeling that no one would see your tears. You sighed heavily as the first tears shimmered in your eyes. Until a few seconds ago, you had been happy about your dress, until Javier had come back to your mind. You had asked yourself the absurd question of whether he would like you in this dress. But it didn't matter at all, because there would be no answer.

Why had Javier hurt you so much ? You couldn't forget his words until today. And yet you had forgiven him. But you didn't know if he was still alive. There was not even an address where you could send him a letter. There were hundreds of letters in your home. Letters that you had written, but never sent. Some you had burned in the fire, others you had torn up. And that's what you did in the beginning to banish Javier. But it was of no use…

You shook your head, undid the bows on your dress to loosen the corset and finally pulled it off your body. What was that all about? Why this torture? You decide to go back home right away. Work was calling and that had always been the best distraction for you. When you had taken off your dress, you put back on the one you had come here in. Your mood had dropped rapidly and that you were sad could be seen clearly in your face, but you didn't care. A bit gruffly, you packed the new dress into the box, which you had received with the purchase, in order to be able to transport the dress safely home. Within a few minutes you were out of the hotel and headed straight for the train station. You hoped very much that you would be able to travel home.

With a quiet sigh, you headed to the cashier's desk to buy a ticket. While waiting, you let your eyes wander around the area. And suddenly, there it was again. The scent of spicy lavender. Just like the day before. Instantly you were reminded of Javier, because he had smelled the same! But you shook your head, about to banish that man from your mind again, when something caught your attention. When you looked out onto the platform, there was a young man… a cigarette in his hand. His raven black hair tied back in a pigtail. A red scarf he wore over a blue jacket. You frowned and stopped in place, watching the man and wondering if you had now completely lost your mind. You thought you saw Javier, but you couldn't swear to it, as he had his back to you. The supposed stranger threw his cigarette to the ground, blew out the smoke, and in the next moment looked slowly in your direction.

As if in a trance, you looked at him, not even hearing what the train conductor said to you, as he handed you the ticket. Javier really was standing in front of you. Only a few meters away, but he hadn't noticed you yet. But he felt all the more that he was being watched. This feeling grew stronger until Javier looked directly in your direction and when he saw you, his heart almost stopped. He stared at you, his throat went dry. How many times had he wished to see you again? How often had he imagined scenarios in which you would find each other again? Saying everything that had remained unspoken? And now that time had come. But for what he had done to you, he could not be ashamed enough. Not just what he had done to you. But John and Arthur as well. You'd probably send him to hell anyway.

"Miss? Miss, the train leaves in five minutes! Miss?"

But you didn't listen at all to the friendly man behind the counter and he gave up, served the other passengers. You were busy processing in your mind what just happened.

Only a few moments passed, but time seemed to stop. And that magic, that moment, dissolved when Javier shamefully averted his gaze from you and walked in the other direction.

"No…"

You wouldn't let him go! Not this time. It hurt you immensely to see him running from you after all these years. Did he have any idea how miserable you'd been without him? You immediately ran after Javier, calling his name.

"Javier!"

Instantly he stopped, looked down at the ground, and swallowed nervously. His Adam's apple trembled, he tried to suppress his tears that were just rising inside him. His heart was pounding up to his throat! His stomach contracted painfully. He heard your footsteps, but he still had his back turned to you. He perceived your scent and for a moment he closed his eyes to recall what you once were. A couple that had loved each other dearly. A young couple who believed that nothing could tear them apart. How wrong he had been. The most painful thing was that he had allowed you to be torn apart.

You stopped at his side, looked at his back, wondered if he still loathed you, because he didn't even look at you. But at least he had stopped.

"Javier?"

Carefully you put your hand on his shoulder, making him turn towards you, but still his eyes were not on you. You could make out a guilty look on his face, which gave you a glimmer of hope that he might feel something positive for you.

"What's wrong with you, Javier? Can't you look me in the eye?"

And after you said this, his gaze slowly moved up to your pretty face. Yet he remained silent, for his words stuck firmly in his throat. You looked at him closely. He had not aged in the last five years. You were still young, just in your early thirties, and yet it seems as if decades had passed.

"Do you think you broke my heart?"

It needed to be said. You've been carrying this with you all these years now. Javier had hurt you deeply, but you had forgiven him. You were ready to make peace, and now that he was standing in front of you, all you wanted to do was lie in his arms. But at the moment it felt like you two were complete strangers.

"Yes, Javier… You did. You hurt me a lot when you stood by Dutch and Micah…"

"It's better if I go, Y/N. I'm sorry…"

Javier had only wanted the best for his family at the time, but had been taken advantage of like a puppet. Dutch had blinded him and that he had listened to it, well, he just had to live with the consequences now.

But you didn't even think about letting him go! What was that about? He was just going to leave? Just like that?! Didn't he have anything else to say? Immediately you grabbed his arm, whereupon Javier also stopped. It didn't look like you had to make an effort to keep him with you. A good sign. At least, that's what you hoped.

"It won't help you if you run away, Javier. You won't undo anything by doing that!"

Besides, you had just found him again.

Javier saw your tears and at that moment his eyes softened. It hurt so much to see you. He had no words to say! It seemed easier for him to leave and go on living his life as he was used to.

"Y/N, I've made a terrible mistake…"

That was what you were hoping to hear. Not because you wanted to claim your right, but because you had hoped he had made his peace with you.

"There is no hope for me. No forgiveness, Y/N."

"Oh, Javier… don't say that. We all made mistakes…"

His skin tingled pleasantly as you placed your delicate hand against his cheek. Lovingly, you stroked your thumb over his skin as you sought the look in his eyes. The scent of spicy lavender rose to your nose, mixed with tobacco and you had to smile, because you associate this scent with many, beautiful memories; but also bittersweet moments…

"Please… Javier, look at me…"

And he looked at you, his eyes reflecting the restlessness and guilt in his soul.

"I don't know where your paths have led you, Javier. But I can see that you have regretted the decision you made back then."

Javier sighed softly, unable to answer anything, but his eyes held your gaze and by God he was glad you didn't loathe him.

"I live in Strawberry, Javier. When…when you're ready for it one day, come and see me. I'll be waiting for you there."

His eyes immediately moved to your hand to see if you were wearing a wedding ring. His relief was great, because he couldn't see anything.

You tell him exactly where you live and to what address he should send letters to contact you. Hoping that he would do so.

When the signal sounded for the train's departure, you were jolted out of your trance.

"This is my train, Javier. I have to go now…"

"Okay…"

That was all he said in response. He held back a lot, because he would have loved to pull you tightly into his arms, not to let you go again. But he didn't. And part of you hoped he wouldn't let you go. Still, maybe that was too much to ask of you.

"Will you walk me to the train, Javi?"

Javi… that's what you had always called him, and this was the first time in years that you saw him smile. It was a small, dainty smile, but it was there. Javier led you to the platform, his hand was on your lower back and your body was tingling like crazy. This little touch, this little gesture, excited you deeply. It was still the man you desired, the man you loved.

"You should… get in. It's about to leave…"

"I know, Javi…"

But you would have preferred to stay with him. Your hope now was that he would seek you out…

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