#my lil squash baby

[whump-queen]

SQUASH TIME SQUASH TIME THATS RIGHT FOLKS ITS BUTTERNUT SQUASH TIME

HELLO AND WELCOME TO MY COOKING SHOW

I HAVE FINALLY COOKED THE BUTTERNUT SQUASH AND HOOOHH BOY WE’RE IN FOR A TREAT TONIGHT FOLKS

I’m sure you’ve been wondering, ‘Akia, how was that squash??’ I’m positive it’s been on your mind. I’m sure you haven’t been able to SLEEP with the suspense of my Squash Saga — so hey listen, don’t worry, I got you.

FIRST OFF: not only did I score myself a lil BUTTERNUT— but I got FOUR squashes. That’s right, FOUR WHOLE DELIGHTS of the season! Paragons of autumn! Five stars! It’s SQUASH SEASON BABEYYY!!!!!

But today,, today!?!? It’s butternut squash time.

Aight we got ourselves a lil before and after the oven and! Wow!! That color! That crispiness!! That beautiful golden hue!!Gorgeous. 🤌 Irreplaceable. 🤌 She is truly one of the gems of this mortal life.

And we cut that beautiful bb squash open and ….. WOW! She STUNS us once again. Folks, just LOOK at that beautiful cross section! Truly Delightful!! Perfection!! I’m Speechless!!

And then we get our—our beautiful squash all plated up and she just, *sniff*— she just looks so beautiful up there, all finished,. god I’m so proud of her. So proud, she’s, come so far… my squash child..

Thanks for… for watching my cooking show *wipes tears* it’s been real y’all <3

Tagging you against your will Idgaf appreciate my squash: @whumpsday @whumpshaped @kira-the-whump-enthusiast @blood-is-compulsory

[eternalwyrm]

trempette pour bébé

[choslut]

˖ ࣪ ، ◞ せ⌇ BABY MOMMA. featuring k. nanami.

↻ there’s nothing nanami wants more in the world than to make you a mommy, and give you his beautiful kids.

tags : breeding kink, creampie, mommy kink (if you squint), messy sex, pet names, feral nanami, marathon sex, lactation + pregnancy (fantasized), ovulation cycle // wc. 0.9k

author’s note : sorry this one’s a lil late, i’ve been busy with theme changes and real life is throwing a million and one hurdles at me and i just can’t keep up 😞 you can't tell me that nanami wouldn't be a massive family man, so here i have him completely desperate to start a family with you and give you his babies. notes and reblogs are always appreciated, and check out my masterlist for non-event based works <3 !!

this work is NSFW. minors and ageless blogs DO NOT INTERACT.

it’s been hours. hours since nanami even proposed the idea of trying for kids, and now, it’s all he can fucking think about. 

it’s all you can think about too, given the fact that he’s fucked you out of your mind, legs numb from being in missionary for as long as you remember with nanami plunging in and out of you, the tip of his cock nudging your cervix with every single thrust. 

it’s repetitive. it’s addicting. 

“hah- kento, can’t take no more…” your voice is a sheepish babble, nails digging into his back as tears stream down your face. “ ‘s too much, ken, please–“

nanami grunts in your ear, hips never ceasing movement as he ruts into you. “g’na have to, sweetheart. this one’s gotta take.”

he said that about the last one, and the one before that, and the one before that… and fuck, you can’t keep up with how many times he’s said it because he’s been going at it for so long with only one goal in mind. 

he’s gonna give you kids. he’s gonna make you a mommy, and you’re gonna raise his kids with him as his wife. 

it’s all he’s ever wanted. it’s all he’s ever dreamed of, and when he watches you lounge around the house wearing nothing but a bra and his oversized dress shirt and a wedding ring fit snugly on your finger, he really can’t stop himself from imagining what you would look like with a swollen tummy, breasts spilling out of that same bra. 

“g’na give you my kids baby…” he’s rambling half out of his ass, his brain scrambled by pure need. “gonna make my girl a mommy. you’re gonna be a great mommy, aren't you?”

he’s brought up the topic before. it was never anything serious, just asking you what you would prefer and never really thinking of his own volition. you had always agreed with him wholeheartedly, and it would somehow lead to the two of you cooing over baby clothes and strollers but never anything more. 

nanami is fucking sick of it. he’s sick of fawning over the idea and not doing anything about it. sure, you’ve made love a couple of times, but it never held any true intent, focusing on the pure need to give each other pleasure. 

well, now, nanami needs more than pleasure. he needs to see you with that swollen tummy and those massive leaky tits, and there’s only one way to do that; fucking you within an inch of your life and cumming in your cunt until it finally takes. 

“kento–“ you seemingly haven’t gotten bored of it yet, despite having been at it for over two hours. your back still arches with every bump to your cervix, nails still raking down his back as his sweaty chest squashes your own. “this one’s gonna take, promise.”

“i can’t be sure of that,” he states matter-of-factly. “although your tracker says you’re ovulating, we can’t just trust that once or twice will be enough.” is he sure of this fact? no, but he is sure that you feel too damn good to stop, even though he’s already finished inside of you enough times to guarantee your pregnancy ten times over. 

you just look so beautiful beneath him. you wear the radiance of sex extremely well, eyes fogged over and mouth hanging open as your steamy pants echo in his ear. you’re borderline intoxicating, and that’s why nanami can’t stop, even though he knows you need him to before you pass out. 

“look at me, angel. i wanna see you.” you weakly turn your cheek away from the pillow and look up at him, lips stained a gorgeous red and swollen from his kisses. “you’re gonna be such a pretty momma.”

your eyelids flutter and your back arches weakly as you cum again for the final time, garbled moans of nanami’s name flooding from your throat. despite the longevity of your session, your cunt still manages to squeeze around him impossibly, and nanami groans deeply, arms sliding around your hips as you pulls you forward to meet his thrusts. 

“kentooo…”

“i know, baby, i know.” the sheets are soiled with your sweat and his, and the tight clampdown of your walls propels him to cum one final time, hips flush against your twitching clit as he pumps you full. 

you both stay like that for a beat, nanami folded over your twitching body before he finally pulls out slowly, and when he does, the sight he’s met with is so incredibly dirty that he can barely believe he was the one to reduce you to such a mess. “oh, angel…”

copious amounts of his release flood from your cunt, leaving a translucent pool on your sheets. whilst he absolutely loves the sight and wishes to brand it on the forefront of his brain, nanami’s goal is still clear as day. 

he leans down and kisses your overstimulated clit, fingers dancing around your twitchy hole and gathering up his release before pushing it back inside with a curl of his fingers that makes you want to scream. 

“can’t waste any, my dear, or it might not take, remember?” when he looks up at you from in between your trembling thighs, the look on his face is nothing short of depraved, blonde strands of hair sticking to his forehead and cheeks stained red with excitement. 

“can’t wait to see my girl become a mommy.”

PREVIOUS : THE COLOUR RED ft. yae miko NEXT : BLACKOUT ft. tartaglia

liked that? check out the WE’RE SO BACK main masterlist.

© choslut 2024 — do not copy, repost or translate my works without permission.

[saint-ambrosef]

newbie's guide to produce

for all my peers who were not taught how to shop for veggies and fruit on a budget and struggle to use them before they go bad:

(disclaimer: prices are approximate based on where i live in the Southern US. costs may be higher in your area, but the comparison of cost should still be valuable.)

cheap produce year-round:

roma tomatoes. if they look under-ripe you can leave them on the counter for a few days. keeps in fridge for about 2 weeks. $1/lb.

cucumbers. around here they're 50-60 cents each. go bad quickly though, about 1 week in fridge.

celery. two bucks for a head. starts to get sad after two weeks in fridge. only makes sense if you like to snack on celery or make soups often.

corn. whole ears are like 20cents each mid-summer, otherwise just get frozen. $1.50 for a lb.

peas. get these puppies frozen for $1.50/lb. good protein, too.

romaine lettuce. one head is good for several small salads, about $2 and lasts a week in fridge. the big boxes/multi-packs may seem like a better deal but not if it all goes bad before you can eat it.

onions. kind of a given but you can get regular yellow varietals for less than a buck per pound. will last for 1-2 months in pantry.

potatoes. you can get 5lb bags of russets for three bucks. sweet potatoes are a lil over $1/lb. last 2-3 months in pantry; if they grow sprouts, you can cut those off and still eat it.

bananas. dirt cheap. a small bunch (4-5) costs like a dollar. if they go over-ripe before you eat them all just get less or get a few green ones (p.s: you're allowed to break them off larger clumps).

radishes. $1.50 for a little bundle. greens get wilty after a week, roots will last 2 weeks (you can use both parts).

hot peppers. poblano, jalapeno, etc., are often quite cheap and you usually don't need very many anyways. few weeks fridge or counter.

cheap produce when in season:

summer squash. in summertime (duh), zucchini and yellow squash are like $1.25/lb. only last a week or so though in fridge.

winter squash. actually in season in fall, these are your butternuts and acorn squash. less than $1/lb then. lasts in pantry for months.

green beans. in warm months they can be on sale for $1.50/lb! last 1.5-2 weeks in fridge? (kinda depends on the shape they're in)

kale. it's a cool-season green that commonly is on sale in colder months. $1.60 for a big bunch, about 1.5 weeks in fridge before it gets seriously wilty. (can be eaten cooked or raw!)

apples. fall/winter, usually at least one variety on sale for $1.25/lb. last forever.

oranges. most citrus are winter fruits. $1/lb. will last forever in your fridge.

strawberries. spring. at their peak, i can find them for $2/lb. otherwise they are too expensive.

watermelon. $8 for big 10lb melons. they can take up a ton of space though and need to be refrigerated once cut/ripe.

cantaloupe. another summer star! $1.50 each on sale. they will slow ripen in the fridge but you do have to keep an eye on it.

pineapple. $1.50 in summer time. might be ripe even when still a bit green, ready when they smell noticeably ripe.

pears. fall season, sometimes into winter. $1.20/lb. last 1-2 weeks on the counter or forever in the fridge.

pomegranate. in winter time they can be found for $2 each. tricky to peel though.

peaches. and nectarines (which are just fuzzless peaches). $1.25/lb in summer and will last for weeks in your fridge.

eggplants. summertime veggie, you can get for $1.50 when they're on sale. otherwise a bit pricey. keep in fridge for 2 weeks.

mid-range produce:

cabbage. three bucks for a 2-lb head but you can get a lot out of it. will keep 3-4 weeks in the fridge but any exposed cut sides will start moldering after a week.

mushrooms. white button or baby bella. $1.50 for 8oz. keep in mind, mushrooms halve in size after cooking. ~2 weeks though.

avocados. if you live in the South like me, small hass varietals are 60-80 cents apiece in winter. ripe when it gives just a little to squeezing (you can't go off color alone).

broccoli. fresh is $1.70ish per head and lasts a week in fridge. frozen is $1.50/lb but might be kind of mushy.

most greens. spring mixes, spinach, arugula, etc can really vary in price but often fall into a few bucks at least per bundle/package. in a fridge's humidity drawer they last 1-2 weeks.

kiwis. i love them but they're a bit pricey for their size. 50 cents each. their keep depends on how ripe they are at purchase.

expensive produce:

asparagus. one of the most expensive veggies. sometimes in spring you can get it for $2/lb (a steal but still a bit much). lasts 1.5 weeks.

brussel sprouts. same as above.

red or yellow bell peppers. they are used sooo often in recipes and it annoys me. often $1.50-2.00 each. last a long time in fridge.

caluiflower. three bucks for a head. yikes!

green beans. when they're not in season, they are like $3/lb.

snap peas. same as above, except they never seem to be on sale.

raspberries. go bad in 3 days and cost an arm and a leg. sometimes when they're in season you can get them for like $2 per half-pint as a treat.

blueberries and blackberries. even when they're in season, they're still $2 per pint.

grapes. they can sorta be affordable in the fall season for $2/lb, but otherwise they're double that. and usually you have to commit to buying several pounds. last 2 weeks in fridge.

plums. i love them so so much but they're only in season for like 2 weeks of the year it seems and they're like $3/lb.

inexpensive accoutrements: (for garnishes, seasoning, etc)

limes. 25cents apiece. they'll start to dry out after 1 week on the counter so keep them in the fridge unless you will use it soon.

lemons. usually 50cents each for the small varietals. keep same as above.

green onions. less than a dollar for a bunch, and you can easily regrow a few times at home if you stick the white rooted end in water by a window.

cilantro. 50cents. will last WAY longer (1-2 weeks) if you keep it in a mug of water in the fridge.

parsley. 85cents. same as above.

obviously sticking just with popularly available produce across the country. it's not an exhaustive list but can give you a bit more perspective on what produce you should be focusing on if you're trying to work with a tight grocery budget. good luck!

[moutainrusing]

hurt/comfort

533 words, @wolfstarmicrofic

Over there, in the corner. Don’t look.

Don’t, stupid.

Remus couldn’t resist.

He glanced toward the corner. There, Sirius was snogging a girl — a pretty girl — but Remus couldn’t be interested in looking at her because he was looking at Sirius. And Sirius was invested in not looking at him. His eyes were closed as he threw his whole body into the kiss, because that’s who he was. He was intense and all-consuming, irresistible and so beautiful and Remus couldn’t pull his eyes away, and he should, he really should.

He was being creepy. His heart was breaking. The heart of a creep deserved to break.

“Oi, Moony!” James grabbed his shoulder, spinning him toward the staircase. “I need a bit of quiet for a moment, ‘cause the party’s really noisy! Wanna come to the dorm with Lils and I?”

“Yeah, Remus!” Lily cheered, grabbing his other shoulder as they both steered him to the dormitory.

Remus glanced between them. “Is this kidnapping?”

Lily waved a hand. “‘Course not, you’re like our kid. Hardly kidnapping if we’re stealing our own son, right?”

James nodded, squeezing Remus’s cheeks. “I love my ickle baby Remus,” he cooed.

“Okay. What’s going on?” Remus asked, as they sat him down on his bed and squashed him in between them.

“Peace and quiet,” James sighed contentedly, resting his head on Remus’s shoulder.

Lily did the same on his other. “Remus, I really do love you.”

“Uh huh,” James nodded, bouncing against Remus’s shoulder. “Sometimes I think she loves you more than she loves me. Honestly, I don’t blame her,” James winked, awkwardly and awfully because he was rubbish at it.

Remus laughed. “I love you both too. And… thank you for taking me up here.”

Lily and James gave him dubious looks. “You have nothing to thank us for,” James insisted.

“In fact, we should be thanking you.” Lily stated, “For gracing us with your presence.”

“Moony, you’re so loveable. Anyone who doesn’t appreciate your Moony-ness is a pathetic wanker,” James declared vociferously.

“A wanker, you hear us?” Lily looked at him sternly.

“A wanker,” Remus smiled. He glanced at James, “Prongs, you do know you’re calling your best mate—”

“Shhhh,” James pressed a finger to Remus’s lips. “You’re all my best mates!” He threw his arms around the two of them, pulling them into a massive hug, and Remus relaxed into it. These were his best mates, and he loved them for it.

After a while, Sirius entered the dorm. “‘Lo, guys!” He greeted, before pausing and narrowing his eyes at them. “What are you doing?”

Lily smiled. “Convincing Remus to have a threesome with us.”

“What?!” Remus spluttered.

“It’s my greatest desire,” James dramatised, ignoring Remus’s furious head shakes. “Did I ever tell you, Remus was my first kiss?”

“No, same! He’s such a good kisser,” Lily rambled eagerly.

“I know right?!” James beamed.

Remus buried his red face in his hands. But when he lifted it slightly, he noticed Sirius looking between the chattering James and Lily with a jealous scowl. And when he looked at Remus, his expression softened, and he looked… enraptured?

Remus hid the grin blooming across his face in his hands.

[togamest]

-> “it’s getting crowded. here, hold my hand.” (x) | 530 words. gn!reader, kakucho has social anxiety and smokes weed. calls reader “gorgeous”.

author's notes: just a lil' something for my baby <3

Kakucho was not one for crowds.

He never has been; he’d rather be at home, smoking a fat blunt and watching whatever stupid shit Netflix recommended to him. Even if he wanted to listen to music with others, having a hangout at home would greatly help his social anxiety and awkwardness; that way, he’s in his element and not where he is now.

Squashed between several people, searching the crowd for you.

It was a concert you’d been begging him to go to; and lucky for you, you were always his exception. He’d even made sure to buy earplugs and dress for the occasion; an outfit to match your own, all black with glowsticks around his neck and black light pant along his arms.

He can feel his throat closing up as his search for you turns up empty. There’s a ringing in his ears, and he can tell people are starting to stare at him. They always do, he can feel the burning gazes whenever he steps outside thanks to the ugly scar arching across his face, but this time he ignores it. The panic rising in his chest is something he needs to focus on more than his presentation to the public.

Finally, after what feels like an eternity, his eyes land on you at the bar, looking equally as terrified as he does. There’s people with you, although no one you seem to know given you’re standing on your tiptoes to look for him. He cuts through the crowd like a shark that’s smelled the faint blood of his prey.

Except it’s you, and he smells your perfume. It’s citrus, something lemon-y as he grows closer, before finally pushing out of the crowd and stumbling into your line of sight.

The relief that floods your face as you see him instantly calms him. “Kaku!” you yell over the music, “Oh my God, I thought I’d lost you! I told you I was just going to the bar—“

He cuts you off with a firm grip on your arm, and you suck in a breath at his motion. You know he’s not good with crowds, and it almost feels like a betrayal that you’ve brought him out. You go to say something else, but he shakes his head, giving you a grin instead, the relief flooding his veins relaxing his grip on you.

“‘S okay, gorgeous,” you hear him say, bending down to your ear, “jus’ take me with ya next time, alright?”

You nod aggressively, before offering your drink to him. He takes a sip, and just as he hands the drink back to you, the music dies down and the main artist’s light show starts. You squeal, about to dart off your seat, but he grabs your hand quickly, tugging on it and intertwining your fingers. You look back at him with a pout, and then in surprise as he begins to carve his way through the crowd, your drink in one hand and your hand in his other.

“It’s getting crowded in here,” you hear him say gruffly as he squeezes your fingers, “hold my hand, ‘kay?”

You don’t let go for the entire night.

divider credit: @/cafekitsune

networks: @interstellar-inn @themovingcastlez

disclaimer: DO NOT copy or repost my works for any reason. translations are acceptable, but please ask for permission first!

© togamest 2023-2024

[magicxc]

Frenemies

Pairings: Survey Corps - people they cannot STAND

Word Count: 1076

Warnings: none

A/N: Idk man I love a good tussle jskksks. Like give me two characters who absolutely hate each other! And with AOT I really don't have to look too far, yay. This is basically canon but it's funny to think about so here it is as well. 

Headcannons Masterlist

Eren  - Jean, Weak People

I think the Jean one gets over exaggerated a little, and for good reason too, cause the girlies be EATING with those tropes. But at the end of the day they have a mutual understanding and are cordial at best. They're mostly cool because they share mutual friends and spaces but it’s no longer beef per se. 

Hear me out, I don't think anyone wiping out 80% of humanity is willing to kick it with people who aint about it. Mans need someone who’s willing to stand on business behind him. Even throughout the show he’s always admitted to not liking people who’s willing to live like “livestock.” So this is not to be confused with physically weak people by the way but psychologically weak people. Essentially Eren has beef if you’re willing to take it lying down. 

Levi - Zeke

Listennnn I LIVE for their fight scenes okay lmao. Like it's almost always on sight for them and their lil jabs at one another? It’s chucklessss for me omg. Lets be clear, their beef is absolutely warranted. It can be safely argued that Levi doesnt really care for most people but Zeke?? Oh baby its all smoke for him. 

Erwin - The Government 

I swear if it wasn't for the literal fate of humanity and his brewing theory Erwin would've just said fuck it cause baybeeee, they wanted that man GONE. They've tried to get him fired, pointed guns in his face, and built a whole ass guillotine to unalive him; in front of the entire town mind you. Maybe that was the custom back then I don't know. I don’t remember Erwin outright saying that he doesn't fuck with the government but fuck it, I’ll say it for him. Cause I'll stand ten toes down behind this one here. 

Connie - Ymir

I promise you I let out a nasty ole chuckle at the thought cause he don't even dislike her fr fr. I think it's a situation similar to Eren and Jean's in the sense that their friends and environment often see them in the same places. Because if we’re being real, not only do they have little in common but they just don't really vibe like that. I think they could've been a little more cordial but Ymir be on her own timing and it's usually at the expense of the squad. Like when she made fun of Connie for suspecting his mother was a titan or when she kidnapped Historia like 3 times and put them all in danger. And I can't even be mad at Connie for being the voice of reason cause him calling her ugly was simply the truth. I, too, reared back when I first saw Ymir's titan form. 

Jean - Eren, Reiner, Annie, Bertholt

The whole Eren thing is basically squashed but it’s worth noting that if he were to see him in public, he’d walk the other way. 

I lowkey had to dig deep for this one cause I genuinely forgot. But even though they’re all kumbaya now, those three bitches literally watched his homie get half his face chewed off by a titan. Jean is absolutely pouring one out for Marco every birthday by the way, but yeahh it’s still fuck them. Like if they were playing uno stacked, he’d save all his draw 4’s and make them draw 16. 

Onyankopon - Yelena

I'm not too sure that Ony dislikes anyone honestly. But I'm going with Yelena here mostly because she’s the reason he found himself in his current predicament. On what was supposed to be a solid plan in motion to save his people quickly turned into Ony modernizing a primitive people, helping build their resources from scratch, having people question his race (and I'm willing to bet my bottom dollar it was mfs that got ignorant), seeming untrustworthy among his peers, almost getting killed, fighting in a war he had nothing to do with, and probably losing his entire family in the rumble. Now, one or two of those things were inevitable, but if you were to view things from Ony’s POV everything went to shit over a bitch with a fatal attraction to a man with daddy issues. 

Reiner - Himself

Lmaooo I LOVE a good Reiner drag. And while this started out as a joke, I'm deadass now. This man stays talking about wanting to end it all but never follows through, smh. With lots of therapy and support, I genuinely think that Reiner would be on the road to recovery and a healthy lifestyle; but there’ll always be that lingering thought on if he’s worth it or not

Honorable mention: Ymir. But solely because she would get in the way of his fantasy life with Historia. 

Armin - Floch? 

This munchkin is damn near Tanjiro levels of sweet cause omg who does he even hate??? He is always looking for the good in people and I'm about to dislocate my shoulder reaching this hard BUT, hear me out - It’s Floch even if he doesn’t outright say it. The same Floch who damaged the flying boat and almost ruined their mission before it even started? The same Floch who fucked it up so bad that Hange had to sacrifice herself which resulted in Armin taking on an even bigger responsibility? The same Floch who got in a lil too close with his bestie Eren? Close enough to be trusted with his future plans? The same Floch who when he lay on that ground bleeding Armin was nowhere in sight? Even at the port where they attacked the Yeagerists and Armin got shot in the face, he pleaded with his old comrades to stand down but Floch is beneath that level of reasoning huh? Whether Armin despises Floch or not it's safe to say if Floch were getting jumped, Armin would definitely sneak in a kick before helping. 

Floch - Erwin

This is literally one of those cases where its like I disagree but I understand lol. That man legit made them do a suicide charge and yeah he lead the charge blah blah blah but I could never be that brave. And so that resentment is understandable but in all fairness it shaped Flochs character for the better to be honest; cause that whole pwussy boi arc was annoying. 

Also adding the main cast of the Scouts lmao. They thwarted his plans and he spent his DYING breath standing on business. Gotta respect it.

Tags - @eveningatthemoviesnetwork

[thesupreme316]

hiiii I’m backkkk

so I was wondering how the Aew boys react to they losing their short s/o In big crowds when they aren’t looking

AEW Stars React To: Losing Their Short S/O in Big Crowds

Pairings: Max Caster x Reader, Eddie Kingston x Reader, Santana x Reader, Kenny Omega x Reader, Ricky Starks x Reader, Hook x Reader

Word Count: 1K

Supreme Speaks: hi sorry for not posting, it's been a long two days. i hope you are well. thanks to anon for requesting again, i really do appreciate it. please remember that you are loved and appreciated.

Warnings: talks about big social crowds, not proofread, GIFS AINT MINE

Taglist: @wwenhlimagines @sheinthatfandom @cassie0sstuff @triscillal @eddie-kingstons-wifey @hooks-martin @hookerforhook

Max Caster (Concert):

He was there doing a concert as a special guest

As he was performing onstage, he saw you in the crowd and was immediately giddy

He was smiling and started to perform harder as he saw you were enjoying yourself

Max walks away for a second, entertaining the other side of the crowd, comes back, and doesn’t see you

Confusion takes over his face it is then replaced with fear

The crowd was a lil rowdy so he was afraid of you getting squashed or trampled; He damn sure didn’t want or need you hurt/uncomfortable

As he was about to ask the crowd to scoot back so he could see you; you were raised above the crowd screaming along with the lyrics

Max looked closer to see you were sitting on the shoulders of best friend, Anthony

He smiled and instructed the crowd to let you two come up onstage

“Let my baby up here….oh you can come too Y/N!”

Santana (Times Square):

YES MY BABY DADDY RETURNED SO I SQUEEZED HIM IN

You guys were walking around in Times Square and as Santana turned around to look at a pair of shoes through the window, you were gone

He immediately started panicking as there was a big crowd and New York itself is a dangerous place

Santana started pushing through the crowd looking for the top of your head while saying your name

Like Eddie, Santana doesn’t allow you to walk by yourself; but he doesn’t know how you slipped away from him

He finally found you cornered by some men (ew) and he scared them off

“Y’all betta back away from my significant other or I’ll stick my foot up your ass”

As y’all hug, you tell him that you were pushed by the incoming crowd and then cornered

“Aw mi cara, you don’t ever have to worry; I’ll protect you.”

Take extra precautions (not to Eddie’s extent) such as interlocking fingers and pulling belt loops

IMAGINE GETTING PULLED BACK BY THAT FOINE SPECIMEN

Kenny Omega (Tokyo Subway IT WORKS I PROMISE):

Okay for Kenny, you get off at a stop in Tokyo and you immediately get carried off the train

Kenny is going crazy at one minute you’re talking and the next minute he can’t find you

He’s constantly asking people if they’ve seen you

“Have you seen a person who’s hella short, has a cute face but an aura of a jackass? Possibly has different colored hair depending on their mood?”

People are looking at him like he’s crazy as he starts pushing people aside (politely)

Eventually, as the crowd diffuses, he sees you standing by yourself just like a ray of sunshine over a storm

He picks you up, glad to see you, smiling from ear to ear

That lasts until Kenny sternly tells you to never do that again

“Next time, I’m gonna put you in my pocket….little Polly Pocket.”

Hook (Mall):

He was looking at shoes in Foot Locker and he lost you

Yes, just like that

But he always managed to find you

At H&M, at Hot Topic, and even at the food court; Hook would always get back to you

After noticing this, you decided to play a game called “Is Hook a mind reader or is he just extremely observant?”

So you quickly lose him in a department store, but he finds you

Hook finds this activity to be quite funny and endearing

When he couldn’t find you he would text you with a smile on his face”

“Alright, you won…even though I see you at Spencers…whatcha getting?”

Overall, he’s never concerned he always will find you, no matter what

Eddie Kingston (State Fair):

I feel like that this is a trick question; that man would not allow you to walk by yourself as he takes your height under consideration all the damn time

So if he loses you; you and everyone is getting their ass cussed out

He would also cuss himself out as he feels responsible (cause he wasn’t watching you like a hawk)

“Damn it, you should have gotten that damn human book bag leash shit for their Sonic Hedgehog ass.”

But he has your location because of you running off like this and he finds you (in this case in line for turkey legs or lemonade)

IMO he would wait until you got your stuff to drag you to the parking lot (good thing you rode all the rides) to give you a “lil talk”

“I swear to god if you walk away from me without any words or warnings again, I will rain hellfire on your little flash ass. I TOLD YOUR SMALL ASS TO STAY STILL AND WHAT-“

He doesn’t mean to yell but he wants you to understand that he’s concerned for you

Does in fact get you the leash book bag from earlier; will never take his eyes off you

Ricky Starks (Basketball Game):

Ricky lets you walk away cause you’re a free person but sometimes you like to roam around

You walked away to get something to drink with him knowing

But because you were taking too long, Ricky got concerned (mildly not Eddie concerned) and he went looking for you

He tried calling you but you left your phone with him since your outfit didn’t have pockets

I also think he would be very calm cause you always come back, but he was starting to worry

Ricky had to keep calm but the thought of you being trampled or swooned by an NBA player was taking over

“What if they meet someone who’s better than me? More handsome, more ch- Nah, they could never.”

Walks back to find you laughing with Jade; and hugs you tightly

Ricky: I thought I was gonna lose you to an NBA player.

Jade: Well they did get Domantas Sabonis’ phone nu-

Ricky: Yeah well you can delete that cause Stroke Daddy is here

[daddyboyhalo]

HIII GUYS!!! a lot of you probably already know it’s me because of my url but hey here’s my lil introduction post too.

hi hello yes i was nightmare and squash (and a little bit of eclipse)!!! i was the tiny little fox kid who was valibell’s first child, and the og fox along with pip, my side bro!! i got sued and went to court because i brought my gay brother tremorsaurus to a baby fighting ring >:D i was oh so very loved and won’t ever be able to stop calling qtubbo and disfrutalakia mom and dad. god help me. as eclipse i got to be the moon to my mom’s stars, and that was very special to me.

i was also the wolfdog nightmare who went through like 4 different color changes (rgb wolf grindset i guess), survived multiple assassination attempts and, dear fucking god, probably had a worse reputation than most people on the server on account of killing lim liminal sewiders (and killing teal tealotl) (and sending the worst hatemail known to man) (and having this whole weird romance thing with vex vexinoux) (among other things). a friend asked me once if i had a personality beyond being a dad, being divorced, and committing homicide, and i couldn’t think of a good answer.

i’m so glad we all got to play touys together. qblrsmp was one of the best things to ever happen to me. i treasure every second of it (which is um a lot. around 950+ hours on the server). and huge shoutout to the admins, they made this a great experience!! thank you, to everyone i met there. i’ll love you all forever and cherished every minute of it, no matter where life takes us now. <3 (takes a lil bow and exits stage right)

[northern-polaris]

The Giggle At a Funeral

so... just want to reiterate I love my bbg Tamlin. Precious lil guy who should have been a happy bard and deserves the happiest ending possible. Just keep that in mind pls. Enjoy!!!

__________________________________________

It looked like it was a quiet passing. 

Not a single peep had rang out amongst the now dark forests, like all sparks of life were smothered to cold ashes. The only noise was the rustling of dead leaves and snapping of weak branches against the harsh wind. 

It looked like it had been a soundless death; an even lonelier funeral.

Rhysand was the one who had originally found the corpse. The body was already in the stage of rotting when the High Lord happened upon the remains. Rhysand seemed to have been there with the intent to antagonize and gloat. One could only rationally assume he was met with an unwanted response from his target. 

Eventually, the news had followed Rhysand back to the Court of Dreams, where Lucien was first informed of it. He had originally been there to offer updates on the politics of the Continent and any changes from the last briefing. All for show, of course, Azriel already knew all there was to know. It just took place so the Inner Circle would test to see if Lucien lied. 

Lucien had been occupying a lone leather chair close to the corner, delicately nursing a small glass of fae wine. Time spent in the Mortal Lands made it so consuming fae cuisine was now unreasonably difficult. It was hard to withstand flavors now when one was accustomed to the taste of ash. 

The Inner Circle was lazily scattered on the other pieces of furniture occupying the room. Mor was languidly draped over a velvet couch, chatting idly with Cassian who was giving her a tender foot rub. Azriel was standing over them, pointedly staring at the floor with crossed arms but dutifully nodding along when appropriate. 

Nesta was off training with the Valkyries. Lucien rarely saw her nowadays, and it felt purposeful, at least on Rhysand’s end. Keeping the outliers separated. 

The ancient horror was, thankfully, away with her Summer Court prince. Small mercies. 

Elain was nowhere to be found. Lucien had stopped letting that wound sting for a while now.

Finally, Feyre was settled in the other couch, her son in her arms. The baby kept trying to squirm out of his blanket, and Feyre was trying her best to keep him snuggled, but Nyx’s small wings kept getting squashed or poked out awkwardly. The boy had started making agitated squeaks, and Lucien could tell a meltdown seemed imminent. Nobody had looked to be worrying about that on the other side of the room. Feyre had briefly glanced upwards at one point towards the Inner Circle, and had tried to get their attention, but her calls were drowned out by their combined voices. 

Lucien had thought about getting up to help several times, but he was rooted to his seat. He had helped her so many times before on much grander scales. The trials, Spring Court, Autumn Court, The armies, and what did he ever receive as gratitude? Nothing at best and torture at worst. 

What would happen to him this time if the Inner Circle deemed him too close for their liking to the Heir of the Night Court? Too close to the High Lord’s Lady? It seemed utterly irrational, but it’s been proven to be completely within the realm of possibility for this Court. 

It made him all the more apprehensive to put his head on the chopping block again for her, even if it was no fault of Nyx.

So he had only watched on, and it made him feel despicable. It was a lonely and wretched feeling. 

Though he had been invited to Velaris, he was certainly not welcome. 

Suddenly, Rhysand had stumbled through the doorway and roared thunderously, shaking the mansion like a quake. Nyx let out a startled screech that quickly devolved to inconsolable wailing. Feyre tried to comfort him, but there was little she could do by herself. The Inner Circle quickly flocked to their High Lord with questions and worry. 

Some started to celebrate the news once Rhysand’s crazed rambles gave enough context. Their applause and cheers seemed to muffle out the baby’s crying and Feyre’s calls for help with her son. Rhysand seemed to be the only one enraged like a mad animal.

Lucien had been struck paralyzed for an eternity before he had found himself winnowing to the ruins that was once the Spring Court, Running to a tomb that was once his home, and standing over the body that was once alive.

Among the bones of animals, He was laying on His side, eyes closed with softened features, like He was merely taking a much needed rest. Thin arms hugged His body, locked in place even after His heart quieted. The tunic, empty baldric, and trousers looked more like they blanketed His emaciated corpse instead of being worn. 

It uncannily looked everything and nothing like who He was before. 

His face was never that peaceful or open. 

It looked unbelievable. Fake. A cruel joke that made him want to hold his breath for the moment when the ruse ceased. But that moment would never come.

Lucien couldn’t understand Rhysand’s rage. Didn’t Rhysand want this? Rhysand was furious at His continued existence and now he has the gall to foam at the mouth at His death?

Rhysand was always a spoilt creature, never satisfied with anything. 

It was all so insane that it made Lucien laugh. He couldn’t hold it back. He kept laughing and laughing until he was sobbing, slowly falling to his knees and his hands clutching weakly onto the cold, rotting hand of the other.  

Tamlin was gone.

[meowzfordayz]

furnace

Author’s Note: in a similar vein, pls and ty check out @ms0milk​’s falling asleep with a claustrophobic s/o !! 🤓����

furnace

Rengoku Kyojuro x Reader, Uzui Tengen x Reader

Word Count: ~900

CW: explicit language, mild sexual content

Suggestion Fulfilled: Hey! I'm new to your blog and so in love! I was wondering if I could request something. Id love the hashira (if you dont want to do them all Id ask for Uzui and Rengoku!) with a fem!reader who is a walking furnance and not much on cuddling cause she overheats easily and sorta feels guilty cause she loves cuddling but just cant do it, especially in summer. I feel its usually the males who are the heat provider but in my case its the opposite. I cant handle heat at all. I'll run around with tshirt and shorts in winter and the cold wont do anything to me. If its not up your alley I understand ♡ 

~faqs~

Doesn’t quite understand at first 🫢

“I thought romantic partners… did this? Nightly?” 🥺

As he lies on his side, comforter lifted up for you to tuck yourself into him

—PLEASE KYOJURO’S SO FUCKING PRECIOUS 😭

He’s trying his best, yanno? Hasn’t been in too many relationships and by that I mean you’re his last first kiss heh

“Kyo…”

“Are you insecure about how you sleep?” ☹️

He’s very concerned

And thoughtful

—I’m in love 🫠

“No?”

“Are you not tired?” eyes brightening as he begins to sit up, “We could go for a run before bed!” 💀

“No no no,” you giggle, gently pushing at his shoulder, “I’m tired. No run necessary.”

Emphasis on NO RUN 😵‍💫

This man 🥴

“Would you prefer to sleep on the other side?” earnest, and already prepared to delicately clamber over you

“Kyo, you’re stressed.” 😆

Still earnest, “I am not stressed at all! I am only overjoyed to share my bed with you,” brow furrowing, “You seem… displeased, however.” 😕

Take a moment to imagine his lip pouted slightly, eyes wide, muscular thighs pressed together, pillow squashed beneath his elbow, unsure what to do next 😔

“Kyo, I’m very pleased,” tone soft, fingertips warm as you stroke his jaw, “And I’m also overjoyed to be with you like this,” cheeks burning, nose scrunching, “But I get like, super hot.”

THE WAY HIS HEAD WOULD TILT IN CONFUSION

Like, “You are always super hot?” 😃

“Temperature, hot. Body heat, Kyo. I’m a furnace.”

“As am I!” grinning now, “We could be a sauna together!” 🥰

—I swear I don’t consider Kyojuro stupid nor entirely clueless, but he is optimistic, and an utter sweetheart and a lil clueless

“Kyo,” poking his forehead, “I do not want to be a sauna together. An actual sauna, sure! But when I’m sleeping? No thank you.”

“You don’t to be hot, sweaty, and sticky together?” 😏

The lowering of his voice is not accidental

—Oh how I would immediately sit on his lap and kiss him silly 😌

“Would we be sleeping sleeping, or sleeping together?” 😉

So maybe he can fluster you, but you can absolutely fluster him too

“How about both? I’ve heard sleeping together can lead to restful sleeping sleeping.” 😎

Does he ruin the moment by winking exaggeratedly?

Perhaps 😝

11/10 would still bang

—This was supposed to be a cute exploration of new-to-love and new-to-sharing-bed-space Kyo, but Ig there’s just no escaping the thirst 😮‍💨

P.S. Ultimately, Kyo understands and doesn’t take offense ❤️‍🔥

P.P.S. You compromise by touching butts 👉🏽👈🏽

If you know, you know

—I usually write Tengen + Hina, Makio, Suma; just feels ~wrong to exclude part of the polycule

Therefore

Tengen isn’t genuinely upset by your lack of desire to cuddle; he knows everyone’s a lil diff in relationships; he’s more than happy to turn down the A/C, turn up the fans, bring you frozen peas or a wet washcloth 🧊

Plus, sleeping naked 🫢

And he doesn’t do immature/jealousy shit like going off to cuddle Hina, Makio, or Suma instead

Your time together is your time together 💞

There’s plenty of love to go around 💝

But he is a big baby about it 🤪

Like, you know he doesn’t actually mind, but you also know he’s going to be dramatic af 🙄

“You don’t love me?” nipping at your finger when you go to pinch his pouty bottom lip ☹️

“Am I not strong enough for you? Not worthy of a snuggle?” as he waits for you to join him in bed, head propped up on his palm so he can flex his bicep extra hard at you ☹️💪

“I promise there’s room for the both of us!” smoothing a hand down his abs, “You can lie here, if you’d like.” ☹️😉

—THE THIRST IS INESCAPABLE 🫠

—I APOLOGIZE PROFUSELY 🙃😂

If you roll your eyes at him, then he’ll scowl playfully, roll his eyes back, and declare, “Fine! I didn’t want to cuddle anyway!” 😒

If you flick his forehead, then he’ll gently catch your wrist, kiss all of your fingertips, and declare, “Punishment for withholding cuddles!” » proceeds to fit your entire fist in his mouth 😶

—Anyone else ever done that? Anyone? Tried to fit your fist into someone else’s mouth? For fun? For shits and giggles? Anyone?! consent granted first, ofc

If you plop on top of him (his abs, to clarify), then he’ll wrap his arms around you, and squeeze until you cry-laugh-scream for mercy 🤗

“Ewww, you’re sweaty,” after he releases you

“Which is why we don’t cuddle,” you snort

*gasp* mock alarm across his face “No cuddles?!”

And so, the cycle continues 

He 100% uses you as his personal space heater, btw 🔥

RoLe ReVeRsAl

Tengen dgaf 😎

His feet freezing during the winter? He’ll literally scrunch himself into a ball (while in bed) so he can wiggle his toes between your toe-sty thighs

🥰Mmm, warmth🥰 <— his brain

 Forgot his gloves?

Your pocket suffices

It’s only ~a tad annoying that his hand takes up practically the entire pocket 😐

Not to mention he constantly switches from walking on your left to your right

He’s attempted to walk behind/in front of you—to heat both hands at once—but that resulted in… well… let’s just say it’s ~difficult to walk like that

If you have boobs, then you already know where his face goes 😃

Nothing like a cold nose nuzzling against your nipple 😆

Overall, Tengen’s more than satisfied w/ your ✨objectively mutualistic relationship✨

P.S. Don’t ask him what he contributes 💀

P.P.S. He has a sinking suspicion he might just be the arm candy 🍭🍬

Dw, he’s obvi more than just the arm candy 🥺💓

[faceeeeee]

I've made a baby Rub's head with clay

Unfortunately he was a bit disfigured because some of the girls in class sat on my bag while it wasn't dry

I don't know what to do with it lolll

RUB HEADDDDDDDDDD HE'S ALIVEEE❗❗❗💥💥💥💥🗣️🗣️! I get that feeling when you do a lil craft outside and then it gets squashed 😔

[florence-end]

Hi! Could you write a story where Helion is sick and Reder takes care of him. Thank you!

Poor Little High Lord

Helion x reader

Warnings: none

Summary: Helion is sick and won’t let anyone take care of him except his mate. He’s also a whiny lil baby.

You thanked the servant who took your bag from you as stepped through the front door, taking a moment to relish the feeling of being home. It took less than the full moment to realise something wasn’t quite right. Usually you could hear your mate’s loud laughter or the sound of his footsteps coming to greet you before you could make it halfway through the foyer when you got home from a visit to your friend Mor in the Night Court but there was no sight nor sound of him today.

Moving through the house, you checked all his usual favourite places to no avail before finding yourself in front of his closed study door. You didn’t bother knocking as you pushed the heavy door open and slipped inside.

Your mate was slumped over his desk, fast asleep and looking like death warmed up. His usually rich brown skin was pallid, the bags under his eyes hinted at several nights of disturbed sleep, and his forehead shined with the sheen of sweat. You didn’t need to visit one of the scholars in the library to figure out what was happening. Helion Spell-Cleaver had the flu.

You tiptoed towards him and gently ran a hand along the side of his too-hot face, watching his eyes flicker open and struggle to focus on you.

“Ah my love, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?” He smiled, ever the flirt even in his current state.

“I wish I could say the same darling but forgive me for saying that you look dreadful,” you respond, resting the back of your hand against his feverish forehead. “Have you called for a healer?”

Helion shook his head, leaning into your touch and bringing your hand to his lips to kiss your palm before mumbling “I don’t need a healer, I just need you.”

“I’m sure a healer would do a much better job of making you feel better Helion,” you pointed out.

“A healer won’t cuddle me like you do, or wash my hair for me or make my tea the way I like it,” he was practically pouting now and you had to hold back your giggle as the High Lord turned into a whiny little baby in your presence.

“Well I am glad to hear your healers aren’t cuddling you or bathing with you my darling. Come on, let’s get you to bed.” You took his hand and he obediently allowed you to pull him to feet, following you like a puppy.

After feeding him some soup brought up by a servant, washing his hair, and forcing him to drink a healing tonic, you crawled into bed next to him and pulled him to lay his head against your chest.

“I love you. Thank you for taking care of me,” he whispers, his words slurred from where his face was squashed against your skin. You pressed a kiss to his hair in response, picking up his book and beginning to read to him in soothing tones, lulling him into a restful sleep.

Thank you for your request! This one is quite short but I don’t really read much Helion x reader so I hope it’s okay💕

[elsweetheart]

dealer!ellie is the #1 spider killer

SO TRUE !!!!!!!

you’d call her literally in tears and girly would sprint out of her class and arrive at your dorm out of breath and frantic just for u to be like “els there’s a spider :’(((((" but she’d never make u feel dumb for being scared she’d only tease u a lil, being like “alright you big baby, go get a glass for me. i’ll catch it and take it outside.” and you’re like NOO ELS U CANT ITLL COME BACK :(((( and she just turns and looks at the spider and is like “fuck it.” and squashes it Zkjfjfjdjsjs

n after you’re all like “ur my hero” 🥺🥺 all over her and she’s just like “yeah yeah, i take payment in kisses. get over here.”

[britcision]

So a bitch got the Dragon Age World of Thedas book and for once the bitch isn’t me (it’s my partner)

And there are RECIPES, so you know what we did

This is the Dalish Deep Forest Comfort, but we ah… we have enhanced it to a wild degree

So Imma preface this with “we have been making jokes about Lavellan’s parents being godawful cooks so he eats everything raw” for months long before we got this book

(There’s a ficlet about it for our Four Heralds AU that may or may not be out already and if not will be soon)

But then we saw this recipe, and… guys? Guys? Let the Dalish have nice fucking things

This here is a spaghetti squash casserole, and one we made with one spaghetti squash instead of three

In the original recipe, the ingredients for this casserole are:

- 3 spaghetti squash

- 2 tbsp butter

- 4 cloves garlic FOR THREE ENTIRE SQUASH

- 2 cups mushrooms

- 2 cups spinach (they lie and pretend elfroot is spinach but elfroot is weed so this might explain the quantities)

- 2 cups diced tomatoes

- teeny bit dried red pepper

- pinch of parsley

- 3/4 cup of feta

- wildflower garnish

Let me tell you right fucking now I don’t think they know how much you get out of a spaghetti squash because we put 2 cups tomato and spinach each in this baby with our 1 spaghetti squash and it’s perfect

So obviously we diverted right at the start, cooked the spaghetti squash with salt, pepper, roasted garlic and red pepper all rubbed in

And to the rest we added onions and a strawberry basil summer sausage that fuuuuuuuuuucks, herbs de Provence, more salt, pepper, olive oil, roasted garlic and red pepper, cracked garlic, allllll the sausage juices, and tossed her up

Crusted the top with aged white cheddar, panko, and more feta, back into the oven, and guys?

This is fucking good just, real fucking good

I thought I hated spaghetti squash but I just hate it when my sister cooks it cuz she cooks like the Dalish apparently, with just… no seasoning

Gonna bastardize many more recipes in future but this one is a winner once you beef it up a lil bit

[gregoftom]

Meanwhile poor Tom seems to only have the fly guys, no wonder he’s so immediately attached and clingy to Greg lol

yeah 😭 it's so sad because like. man. i was just thinking about that, maybe he's the one with little to no real friends like. tom is such a tragic fucking character taking ls left right and centre and like i'm not about to say that he did nothing wrong but fucking hell. he suffered more than christ and for what. [to get ceo and his boy but ygwim fdhkjfd]

no but like. idk it's just sad because his heart is as soft as a baby bird. his true nature beneath the roy suit is romantic, gentle and loving but he squashes it down best he can to fit in and and when he does let it show he gets rejected by shiv and at least in his mind, by greg. the self hatred i know he has inside is so much. free my man he only did some of it

i already think he has textbook bpd generally and that explains a lot of his behaviour but i think his worst fear [which to me is losing greg] is a little more founded when we think more about how greg is personable and kind and can easily connect with others and tom, which we can assume from his only friends being the two??? fly guys cannot. him being terrified and hurt that greg will leave and do his own thing, oh. you can't stand me either then? UHF!!!! god! ow!

tom :((( i love him sm my baby child of this earth i love him my favourite lil guy i will protect him at all Costs