#my life is a literal mess
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my life a movie (PSYCHOLOGICAL HORROR)
#when i die imma go to adhd heaven 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#★ my art#art#dandys world#dandy’s world#dandys world astro#dandys world goob#dandys world toodles#dandys world oc#★ arin rambles#Literally ive only gotten twisted astro 2 times in my life and both of them ended in tragedy#the first one was a blackout So i died (i suck at blackouts) i didnt even see him i almost cried#the second one……. Well…. i was in a game w my bestie and some random rodger#and he goes in chat#‘its astro. be careful on that machine’ BOY I READ THAT MESSAGE IN CHAT AND FUMBLED SO BAD#I MESSED UP THE CALLIBRATION AND SHRIMPO FOUND ME. I GOT BODIED. JUMPED. ATTACKED.#I DIDNT EVEN GET TO LOOK AT HIMMMMMM 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#my bestie let me spectate her getting chased by him so i was in adhd heaven but Man i was so mad.#i fumbled so hard im so embarrassing i was SO HAPPY when i saw it was astro I COULDNT FOCUS ON ANYTHIGN#i always add goob Somwhere in my doodles#Hi Goob !!!!!!!!
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Happy Bang Chan Day (2024) ♡ insp / template
#bang chan#stray kids#bystay#createskz#staydaily#channiesnet#*mine#l.gif#l.gfx#dreamytag#melontrack#usersemily#userlau#usersa#usertsu#it’s channie day ♡#happiest of birthdays to you my sweet 🥹💗#i love you dearly ♡∞#forever grateful for your existence#you make life so much better truly :')#i'm sry it's a bit late and a hot mess </3#literally everything that could go wrong went wrong omfg#which put me behind#and ig i got carried away#last panel is silly af cuz it was the last gif to be finished#i made it this morning after pulling an all nighter to finish the set
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this situationship getting a bit craaay-zaaay
this is literally just glorified shotgunning of smoke and i feel deranged this man wouldnt mind being destroyed by this bug and i find that interesting
#chasing stars au#Sīdus the Fallen star#prismo the wishmaster#the carmine cavalier#scarab the god auditor#prohibitedwish#fionna and cake#adventure time#adventure time au#my situationship shotgunning my literal essence#hes got a messed up relationship with destruction considering he entered life expecting it soooo#he sooo wants to be destroyed by him#down to his very core#just to feel an experience he hasnt before
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Imagine an AU where instead of dying he turns into 3 mini versions of himself (the individual kids he's made up of)
And Matthew(?) I think is his name, finds you first, and tries to apologize like, "I'm so sorry... what happened was wrong. You can punish me for it if you want, but please help me find the other two. They don't deserve to be out there alone..." and then it's just the player becoming a single parent of 3 pieces of dough
#doey#doey the doughman#poppy playtime#poppy playtime chapter 4#poppy playtime doey#doey fanart#doey au#small doey#poppy playtime au#poppy playtime Fanart#angst#I AM A MESS#THIS PIECE OF DOUGH IS TAKINF OVER MY LIFE#AAAAUUUGGGHH#HES LITERALLY MY SON OKAY#I LOVE HIM#AAAAAAAA
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did a little sketch yesterday that i really liked and tried to get it done today just so i got literally anything to post- but i fell into the trap of 'making sketches to elaborate and thus really stiff and non fun' (for me), ... soooooo .. im redoing the whole thing
but the idea was a mummy ganondorf for my (yes still existing) totk rewrite; i wanted to make him more scary looking and also emphasize just how horrid it must be to be kept in between life and death by having your heart grabbed by a cold and vengeful magical hand for thousands of years (in this case the ancient queen .. which i also tried to sketch despite not showing up aside from her dissolving hand)
the spell starting to fail and his body being more damaged in some parts (jaw being only the bones left for example) and his chest open from being slowly eaten up by the queens magic, the ribs contorting around it like its a gravitational pull- sounds cooler than it looks bc this sketch did not work out, so im saving the details for the .. hopefully, better version
#ganondoodles#art#tloz#ganondorf#posting it mainly ... to have something to post#and bc i think i remember someone telling me they like that i soemtimes post 'failed' sketches or paintings that i wont go back to#anyway ... this is one of them ...... felt rly pressured bc the weekends already over again and i dont want to work ......#was probably doomed from the start- detailed sketches rarely work out ofr me lol#anyway- also havent decided yet if i want him to have a heart still ... or if it too was dissolved by her magic#and you can still hear his heartbeat even though there is nothing in his chest#or maybe only like ... a spirit .. non physical heart ....#or its 'just' made of malice#.... or he doesnt have it at the very start and then at the mid fight he rebuild it somewhat#and for the end you find him in a tangled mess of pulsing roots like those that were in canon totk (but didnt mean shit i guess)#bc hes literally taking the life of the land to be as strong as he could possibly be#but like ... cool#i also have plans for a “demon” version and the good old boar#three phases and none is a cinematic thing#he will be a dark souls boss and you are way too low level ... i can do whatever i want in this rewrite you cant stop me!!#'kids have to play this gam-' no they dont this is in my head forever!!! no one is playing it but me!!
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they weren’t kidding that frisk someone can sure strange
anyway so the “see you in the next hell, losers” is inspired by this video ! it made me Think. undertale was their first hell(possessed by the SOUL), deltarune is their current hell(wants the SOUL back)
and the “try as you might, you continue to be yourself” is from when you get a second red flag in Ball Game in undertale ! thought it’d be ironic since. theyre kinda not acting like themself since they don’t have the SOUL anymore. not that they even really know who they were without it
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also knight chara is here
#the art gallery#deltarune#strange someone frisk#knight chara#has it been long enough that I should reexplain ssfrisk. it’s my theory substantiated by absolutely nothing#undertale frisk is the ‘strange someone’(as described by seam) who fucked up jevil (and spamton)#bc they were the playable character in ut and they’re know aware how their life was a video game. they got locked out of undertales univers#bc of the ‘I have places to be’ ending. they got introduced into the deltarune universe bc the game isn’t complete#they want to go home + the SOUL back bc they literally dont remember their life before falling into mt ebott#and well without the SOUL now their life is kind of A Mess. I mean look they don’t have it anymore and now they’re a villain /jokey
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teen wolf meme: [2/2] locations -> the hale house
I've been having dreams. Dreams, or nightmares? Nightmares... About a fire. It's this-this house, and I can hear screaming-
#teen wolf#peter hale#derek hale#scott mccall#allison argent#jackson whittemore#chris argent#lydia martin#twedit#twgifs#mine#my gifs#twmeme#LETSGO HAUNTED HOUSE#also jeff davies i noticed that the architecture of the house doesn't match like at all when it's a burned down husk and the version peter#shows lydia of before#don't think i didn't#also there's a like 1 second clip in co-captain of one of the perpetrators of the fire pouring gasoline on the house and it again looks#nothing like what peter showed lydia#so either peter lies about the weirdest things (he does) or jeff davies doesn't care about continuity (he doesn't)#anyways it's one of those inconsistencies in the show i've decided to read as a powerful metaphor instead#the fire of the hale house was literally so traumatic not only to the people who inhabitet it but also to the house itself as its own agent#that it forces the house to literally change its outwardly appearance#also slightly less fun metaphor to read into the inconsistency is simply that peter's recollection of the events leading up to the fire is#so messed up that he doesn't even remember what his own house the house he had lived in his whole life actually looked like anymore
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If I see another "Silco didn't accept Powder" take I'm breaking tables I'm so serious right now
#people really be taking every line of dialog literally#hmmmm i wonder why Silco told Jinx to let Powder die only when she was already all grown up. it's as if he said that under very specific#circumstances and it does not in fact represents how he perceives Jinx#my stupid baka life man i can't take it anymore#“ooooh but he corrected Vi when she called Jinx Powder-” ya??? because it's a name Jinx chose herself and Silco wants Vi to respect that???#pleeeeeasee. PLEEEEEASEEEE. GIVE SILCO MORE CREDIT FOR HIS PARENTINGGGG#HE DID A LOT OF MESSED UP STUFF. BUT THE ONLY THING HE CONSISTENTLY DID AMAZINGLY IS ACCEPT JINX AS A PERSON#BEGGING YOU. PLEASE.#silco arcane#arcane critical#arcane#jinx arcane#silco and jinx
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*cracks knuckles* Okay lets talk about the elephant in the room: Style going to the support group for those who've suffered loss and telling what appears to be a fake story about losing his pet dog.
I'm going to point out a few things that I think provide a framework for Style's actions here. Not because I think it excuses what he did, but because I think a nuanced read is what the character deserves.
Point 1: An irresistible opportunity
The subs put the "Support Group for Loss" on the image in the notebook, but I'm not sure there's anything to suggest that Style would've known that was what this image represents until he showed up and saw the sign on top of the door.
In episode 2, Bison says, "He plans everything down from years, months, weeks to days" and then tells Kant:
So Style is literally just going to addresses/locations at given days and times, potentially not knowing what to expect. And as much as Fadel is certainly attending this meeting as a response to having that heartbreaking flashback (😭), this is also something he attends regularly and has planned to attend way in advance. So Style has no reason to think Fadel is attending this meeting because of a recent resurfacing of his pain.
What we, the audience, and what the characters know are very different things.
Now, should Style have turned his cute ass right around once he realised what this meeting was? Of course he should. But that wouldn't have been true to Style's character. We've been told by his best friend that he is "crazy" and been shown repeatedly that he lives right up to that description.
Style is impulsive. He's all base instinct and he acts on his desires without thought or contemplation. And by this point he is desperate for a deeper connection with Fadel. He's fascinated, captivated by the mystery that is Fadel and this is an excellent opportunity to finally see behind the wall Fadel so carefully maintains.
When Style sees the sign above the door, Style looks at the notebook (which, again, shows nothing but people sitting in a circle with the words RISE UP) like he's just realising what it means. He then gets this amused, almost rueful look on his face (like he's thinking "am I really going to do this?") before it shifts to determination and he walks through the door.
(My soul for the ability to once again gif something because FUCK Dunk is doing SO MUCH in this show!!)
To Style, this is just too good of an opportunity to give up.
Because let's be real, Fadel is so clearly lying and hiding something:
Fadel is shady as FUCK. He is simultaneously actually a really good cook (Style finally tries his burger so he knows, now), and also has the skills to work at a strip host club, and also can take on 3 guys in a fight, and also can break a man's arm with his thighs. Can you honestly blame Style for losing his mind just a little bit about wanting to get his hands on something, anything, to figure this man out?
Style is being absolutely consistent in his persistence to understand Fadel. This isn't about the car or about finally 'winning' the fight (thank you @airenyah for giving such a detailed framework to understand what Style's been doing until this point) anymore. This is about Style wanting to know Fadel himself.
Point 2: The potential implications of the setting
Now, what might give us a bit of insight as to why Style is this way? I have a theory (albeit one that could prove to be very wrong, but hear me out). I think this whole entire show is set in what could potentially be quite a small town/suburb.
There's a few things that make this theory plausible:
(1) Fadel and Bison are in hiding after Bison blew their previous cover. They're probably on the run from some section of the authorities and so it makes sense to settle in a quiet/out of the way place.
(2) Style seems to be really familiar with the people in the area. Like he grew up there and its the kind of small town where everyone knows everyone and everyone is in everyone else's business.
(3) Style is clearly the darling of the market aunties and uncles.
Style just lost her a sale and potentially a loyal customer, and she's still rooting for him? In episode 2, when Style asks the uncle to let him borrow his cart, it takes nothing but his word for the uncle to give Style his entire cart of produce for his ridiculous scheme.
Style is so clearly someone they all know well and have great affection for, and a very plausible explanation for this is that they all watched him grow up and the entire market (town/village) is fond of him.
And honestly?? Yeah, we see the way Style is actually quite sweet in that careless, guileless, thoughtless way. He goes the extra mile to fix his mistake with Fadel by replacing his car parts for free in episode 1. He helps out by taking orders in episode 2 without being asked and takes it seriously. In episode 3, he tries to drive more business to Fadel's store (bless him, he so clearly does NOT understand how restaurants work, but he MEANS well!!), and can we all acknowledge that it works?? He understands how to appeal to potential customers in the area because he knows the people there. It's not (entirely) his fault that Fadel wasn't remotely prepared for an actual rush crowd and Bison was off getting kinky with Kant and not doing his (fake) job. He is so clear about not judging Fadel's host job and tries his hardest to help him (to absolutely NO effect, but still) when the 3 guys gang up on Fadel.
Style is so loved and more importantly so very loveable.
Point 3: What this could mean for Style's character
So, potentially, Style is someone who grew up in a small town, who has been well loved, potentially spoiled and coddled, but also very much kept within the confines of the narrow viewpoint that a quiet, country town places on you.
It's in the way his dad scolds him as if he was still a child when he's at least in his mid to late 20s. It's in the way Style was so mad at Fadel for scolding him ("thanks for the lecture, dad"), like that hit a sore point for Style. It's in the way no one in the market takes him seriously; they're fond, but he's still a kid in their eyes. It's in the way he has an abundance of free time like he doesn't REALLY need to work at his dad's shop. It's in the way he sees Fadel beat 3 guys up with ease, starts wondering if Fadel is an assassin or a hitman, and is completely unfazed like he doesn't quite have a handle on reality.
It's in the way his best friend is a man who has no qualms about lying to him and putting his life in danger, and how Style seems to have no other friends or people (aside from his dad) in his life.
@wuxian-vs-wangji made a comment to me about Style being desperate for a meaningful connection, and I think she hit the nail on the head. Because along comes Fadel, a mysterious stranger with a suspiciously versatile set of skills who is also very hot and keeps giving Style these wonderfully complex reactions? Who sometimes wants nothing to do with Style, but at other times seems to be at war within himself about desperately wanting him? Who treats Style with anything but apathy?
This is catnip to Style; he never had any hope of resisting this.
Breaking news: Style is a complex and imperfect character...
Here's the thing, though: he was never going to try. The show has been incredibly upfront about who Style is as a person. Regardless of whether I'm correct about why he is this way (ie. that he is very much the product of the environment that didn't know how to handle a kid with Style's personality), episode 3 shouldn't have surprised anyone about Style. He's been incredibly consistent and true to himself.
He wants Fadel and he's "crazy" enough to go all in, no holds barred about it, and the Support Group was the biggest doorway to finally discovering something REAL about Fadel.
And its not just about sex or to prove his superiority anymore. Because if it was just that, then Style would have reacted very differently to their first time.
In this scene, Style is pleased and evidently enjoying himself, but he isn't exuberant. He isn't overcome with joy. If anything, he was more happy and excited when Fadel let him help out in the diner (I mentioned this in the tags in this post too) than he was when Fadel is literally fucking him. He lets Fadel set the pace; barely moves to touch Fadel except to hold him close. Almost like he doesn't want to accidentally mess this up, like he's worried he'll take too much, so he'll take what Fadel gives him and no more (please appreciate @braceletofteeth's amazing tags on this post). For a character that has been so aggressively on the offensive, this is shocking until you realise that sleeping with Fadel - while it's a step in the right direction - isn't Style's end goal anymore.
And he makes that abundantly clear in this episode:
Does Style even fully realise the weight of this desire? I doubt it. But I do believe that Style is in earnest. He doesn't fully understand his own feelings, but he also doesn't really care to either. All he knows is that he wants Fadel, wants his attention and his passion and his focus and his heart.
...but Style is also kind of, sort of, perfect.
Because he's exactly, precisely, breathtakingly exactly what Fadel needs.
Because Fadel is hurt and broken and bleeding inside. Because Fadel is barely holding it all together for Bison's sake, but has already given up hope for any true happiness for himself. Because Fadel can't trust anyone or anything in his life, when he's been used and used and used by the family who should've loved and cared and protected him.
Because it's going to take nothing short of this kind of unwavering, unshakable, uncomplicated determination to give Fadel even a chance of healing and opening his heart to love again.
#saw a post about style being one-dimensional and boring and I nearly had a breakdown because what are you TALKING about???#he's so perfectly messed up and terrible and unfiltered and WONDERFUL in all the wrong and right ways#and others have pointed out there's potentially even MORE to style's backstory because of the “coincidence” of Lilly meeting with#someone with the same name as the dog Style talks about in his story#listen the story telling in this show drives me inSANE in the best way and i'm baffled at some of the takes i'm seeing#can we at least... let his story play out maybe before dismissing or hating on Style?? its literally ONLY episode 3.#anyway yes its me your resident style apologist back to be unnecessarily emotional about style again#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#thk meta#style meta#hui talks thk#hui talks thai bl#style sattawat#fadelstyle#also FUCK ME dunk is just constantly serving every single episode and i've seen so many posts appreciating joong's acting (RIGHTLY SO!)#but not nearly enough love for the frankly INSANE performance dunk has been giving every single episode#i love him i love him I LOVE HIM SO MUCH OKAY T_T#dunk natachai#ALSO (not that this means i can speak for everyone in a similar circumstance)#but as someone who lost my father to cancer as a teenager i DO understand and relate to the FURY Fadel must have felt in ep 3#and i DO think style was wrong to have treated the situation so lightly#but like literally WHAT in this show sets up any expectation for style to have the emotional maturity to do that?#and also this doesn't make him an inherently bad person ACTUALLY#it makes him an idiot and needing to be taught the right way to respond to people who are grieving. but guess what; he's NOT ALONE??#because let me tell you the amount of times i wanted to punch FULL GROWN ADULTS for giving me “well meaning” platitudes at my dad's funeral#...but the thing is they DID mean well. they just didn't realise how hurtful their words were#and life is filled with imperfect people who make mistakes and part of our journey is learning from them and trying our best to be kind
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Can you believe that I have spent this entire year completely obsessed over one fictional character? Minthara Baenre, what a woman you are!
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#bg3#baldur's gate 3#minthara#minthara baenre#evil murder kitten#felt it best that minthara should have the honor of being the focus of my last post of the year#this woman has lived in my head rent free for over 365 days#she has left me unable to think about literally anything else#not to mention minthara and bg3 has inspired me to write fanfic - something i have never really done before#well - at least not to the capacity that i'm currently doing#i have had many oc's - but none as fleshed out and well developed as daedra#and i only created daedra *for* minthara#minthara has left a permanent impact on me and i will never forget her#i'm so grateful for larian for creating such a wonderful character and for emma gregory for bringing her to life#and to think this all happened because i messed up my first playthrough and backed myself into raiding the grove
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(okok very self indulgent sorry!!)
imagine dottore w a chronically ill reader, who struggles with walking and movement in general. he would be so nice and soft :((( as a doctor hes seen it all. he would grab them stuff when they need it, get things set up and packed if they went out, and he would know every solution to any ache or pain :(( <33 i know hes just such a sweetheart to his favorite patient :3
Dottore is more than aware that you have trouble moving around and ensures you don't tire yourself more than you have to. His biggest solution to this was to create a method of high-speed communication - in other words, there's a button in your room that sends an alarm to the main lab (which at least one segment is always there) and then they can communicate with each other as to who will go to assist you. Of course, this is mostly used for medical reasons, however... you have used it to bring a segment over for some hugs and kisses if you need a recharge. Although you may feel guilty for calling them over so much, especially with their work, Dottore reaffirms that he'd prefer for you to do that rather than accidentally hurt yourself. Even though his words may seem gruff at times and you two have your arguments, he will never skip out on this duty to you.
Also, he and the segments have also become proficient in setting up dates in the lab. Despite how he's content to remain in his lab, he's smart enough to understand that life can get bleak when you have trouble moving around and can't always access the things you want to do. Therefore Dottore makes sure to choose activities that are always comfortable for you. Zandy favors fun board games. Everyone else likes chess - maybe four in a row too. (Has he gotten tipped off by Columbina a few times about bubble baths, the latest foreign book you wanted to be imported, a meal you've been craving, a new album of Radiant Spincrystals to listen to together? Perhaps.)
In all honesty, Dottore would prefer if you just stayed in the lab so he can keep a constant eye on you, but he knows that would lead to more unhappiness - so he just makes sure a segment always accompanies you. (Said segment gets kicked out if you happen to visit Columbina though.) The scholar also tries to install things where he can, mainly in your and his rooms, such as rails near your bed and bath so it's easier to get up. If you use any sort of mobility aids, you can bet he'll add some kind of feature to it too. I wager a button that shoots blue fireballs. Although many would say his knowledge was gained unethically, he has no qualms about continuing even if it makes you feel one percent better.
#smooches talks#dottore love notes <3#fragile reader <3#DONT APOLOGIZE ANON!!! U ARE SO RIGHT!!! HE SO SWEET TO U THE SWEETEST!!!!#also am hugging u gently ily#also i realized i havent posted in a week BWDEUDW SO SORRY... classes got me messed up rn. literally fighting for my life in this one class#(still feel free to flood me with softtore)
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weird (not quite) autumn- one layer practice Mae with some vague leaves stuck on for funsies
#nitw#night in the woods#night in the woods fanart#nitw fanart#mae borowski#mae nitw#mae night in the woods#nitw art#night in the woods art#my art?#i have neither the hands nor the spoons for proper lined stuff so I’ve just been messing around w lineless maes in different colors#i do know she doesn’t have a tail but i did not consult a ref and also she should. tails r fun#she remains one of the hardest things for me to draw and this didn’t rly help with that but i Did actually learn to draw simple leaves#which has also been a difficulty for many years#so I guess that’s something#i seem to have severely damaged my right arm/elbow trying to Sleep. life is so much fun rn.#i literally just lightly leaned on it and bam three days of screaming stabbing pain why are my limbs made of fucking glass this is absurd#anyways. look a rare fanart appears#at midnight. because i simply cannot be arsed anymore
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who you gonna call?
THE DEAD POETS!
This is inspired by a post from @blakenation1 , where they talked about modern! dead poets dressing up together for halloween :] i hope you like this!
no speedpaint this time, unfortunately, since the video of it is too big to upload :(
#my art#art#digital art#finished art#fanart#dead poets society fanart#dead poets fanart#dead poets#dead poets society#richard cameron#stephen meeks#steven meeks#todd anderson#neil perry#charlie dalton#knox overstreet#gerard pitts#halloween art#ghostbusters#technically#poly poets#i made this with the intention of making them all gay for each other but you can def see it as platonic#i tried to make all their costumes a little different to show that some of them bought it and some made it#they're all a mess of limbs because they're all touchy-feely and cuddly with each other. not sorry#you can tell that meeks is my favourite. i tried to give her red lipstick but also not TOO visibl3 but yeah#i struggled with the costumes so bad because i've literally NEVER seen ghostbusters in my life. i tried my best okay#anyway#enjoy the burnt food#<3#this took me 7.5 hours. dear lord
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“We need more morally gray characters” you guys can barely handle topaz and jade.
#yeah I said it#hsr#Honkai star rail#topaz hsr#topaz and numby#jade#jade hsr#hsr Jade#hsr topaz#like they’re not good but their not mustache twirling villains y’all#yes topaz did mess up by not telling bronya the actual success rate if she accepted the deal#but you have to remember she was indoctrinated since she was a kid that the ipc was good and that those who surrendered to its power will#succeed and thrive#hell they may have used examples like boothills home planet as warnings#of course she would think the ipc is good and will#help jarillo#her home planet was on the brink of collapse when the ipc came and it was quite literally life saving#even though it did mean robbing the future of a population to work for them topaz so grateful for the ipc and sees it as a way to pay back#you guys are forgetting that she was willing to sacrifice her position and that she was happy the planet could be independent#now we don’t know much about jade but she doesn’t go seeking out desperate people#those people come to her and accept those deals knowing full well every detail and it’s cost#she may get some pleasure from it sure but she’s just doing business with people#and yet I see people view them as villains and yet not call out aventurine with helping the ipc take control of penacony#he’s a victim yes but so is topaz when it comes to the ipc manipulating them#topaz has good Intentions and is just following what she has been taught since childhood#look I love aventurine I really do but he’s not pure and at the end of the day both him and topaz are people they are flawed#they’re not completely bad or good#sorry it was mainly about topaz we don’t know much about jade and I might change my mind on her when we do
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Happy New Year!
Wishing everyone a happy and healthy new year! This has been quite the year for me! Ending with the birth of my son on December 7th! Life has been crazy lately but extremely rewarding! Starting to get the hang of things which allowed me to work on this little project today! It's late in the day but I'm still proud to have done something! A new year's celebration with our couple of the moment - Ella and Eric! Let's see how 2025 treats me and them, shall we?
#new years#blog stuff#life stuff#edit#sims 4 edit#sims of color#royal simblr#royal sims#sim: ella#sim: eric#also my recent posts are all messed up!#Queue ate a critical post#another never left drafts#so bare with me as I try to properly end the chapter#rewriting a post is so hard#esp with a newborn lol#love this one so much#literally took all day between diaper changings and feedings lol#gotta get used to this new life lol#2nd time in game since his birth tho!!
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i loooove when ocs unrealized development makes them feel like real people like no i dont know whether talon is genuinely attracted to women after years of both clinging to them for safety and years of putting them onto that untouchable idealized Perfect Protector Pedestal that must remain untainted by any bad experiences, so he doesn't even try to Be With any. He doesn't know either
#like i heart bisexual men so part of me is like no yeah he does like women. he literally loves women#>what if this is just love as general blind devotion solely on the basis of them not being men#we all know he likes men without much of what would be societal shame but he still grapples with it in that personal way#in the if i like men it means i like them despite what happened to me -> i secretly like what happened to me way#talon like i like men and women but i could never spend my eternal life with a man. as a way to just focus on one thing (finding said women#instead of letting himself think about anything else at all#oc text#ill let it float into my mind but idk because this would mess up his original plot before i kept him#though tbh i want to keep keeping him idk if ill ever let him go back home ykwim. long gone concept at dis point he's mine now. ours#talkys#also this makes things more interesting too in the way of#well it was previously thought that talon has a great interest in [smunker] because of smunkers Body#a sort of unintentional and subconscious rejecting of [smunker's] gender and seeing him#as not a man#now its like. what if its not that. it rly is just sole attraction to men because well al is also a pretty feminine guy#views challenged because no‚ men one way (bad) and women another way (good)#but theres TWO guys here who exhibit femininity so he's like wait hold onnnnnn waittttt#that subconscious conflict still exists though in the fearing al (at first) due to his body and both terrorizing and clinging to [smunker]#because of his#the terrorizing because talon sees his original self in smunker (weak and youthful‚ cherubic‚ naive)#theres so many layerssss#anyway yes. loving women as in of course i love women. beautiful and they keep me safe#but not in any way further than that... i love them i can and will kiss them and do much more but it doesnt feel The Same#i dont think i actually even have any fully gay guy characters [EXCEPT MAYBE THE SELF? LMAO IDK] bc i love bisexual men so much#groundbreaking...#wait sorry more oc rambling this actually would also make sense too because how i imagine talon with women is exaggerated#complete personality change to be pleasant and pliable and you can do whatever you want to me#when its also known that the reason he ''acts out'' with al and [smunker] is because he feels safe enough to drop any and all masks to do s#hmmmmmmmm i must keep thinking
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