#my knuckles were bruised like violets sucker punching walls cursed you as i sleep talked

[nuttmeg13]

afterglow 🫱🏻‍🫲🏼 the great war

[cowboylikesubai]

just had the most sickening realisation that deku and bakugo did not, in fact, survive the great war.

[drivemysoul]

yes i'm thinking about the kirigaya siblings and the great war again

[writersblockiskillingme]

The Great War | Finnick Odair

Pairing/s: Finnick Odair x fem!reader

Summary: After everything that you've been through during the rebellion you finally found the peace with Finnick.

Warning/s: angst with happy ending, hurt/comfort, war, weapons (reader has a knife), bow and arrows, trident, axe, syringe, violence, fighting, Katniss gets struck by lightning, blood, trust issues, attempted suicide (not graphical, but it's talked about), wounds, pills, trauma, Finnick ALMOST dying, Snow's execution and Coin's death, possible grammar and spelling mistakes

Author's note: Once again, a fic inspired by Taylor Swift's song (are we really surprised?)

My knuckles were bruised like violets

Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked

Spineless in my tomb of silence

Tore your banners down, took the battle underground

And maybe it was ego swinging

Maybe it was her

Flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur

The heat was getting to your head, it was staring to be too much. It already was.

The holes in your bodysuit that were the consequence of the poisonous fog were everywhere it seemed like. Your hair was sticking to your face because of the sweat from the intense heat and exhaustion. You gripped your knife that seemed to fit you a little too perfectly. The golden earing that Haymitch gifted you so that Katniss could recognize you as one of her allies was hitting the side of your face as you ran to the lightning tree.

You were terrified. You were in on the plan to get Katniss out, of course. Everyone except Katniss and Peeta was.

You did your part. You joined Johanna and cut out the tracker inside of Katniss' arm. But that's when things went wrong. One of the carriers attempted to attack you. It was dark, tropical trees were everywhere, you couldn't see anything. You didn't know who attacked you. All you knew was that you pushed Katniss away to keep her hidden and Johanna ordered you to run while she distracted the person who tried to attack. For a moment you stood there frozen, hesitant. Johanna Mason then swinged her axe at you and you had no choice but to bolt away as fast as you could.

Your mind was racing too fast. Finnick. Katniss. You had to get to that tree to make sure that they are there. That they are okay because you were one hundred percent sure that if they weren't you would lose your mind. You would become the madness itself.

You didn't hear anything but two pairs of footsteps running somewhere north from you. You kept running, trying to ignore the intense dehydration, heat and exhaustion. But as you didn't hear nor see Johanna after a while you started to seriously regret your decision.

You pushed your was through to the lightning tree. You didn't have time to catch your breath because it was immediately knocked out of you as you saw Katniss pointing her arrow at Finnick. He was still holding his trident, but you know that he wouldn't use it even if she did shoot him.

"Katniss!" Your raspy voice yelled out, Finnick immediately turned to you. A look of relief washing over him as he saw you.

"Remember who the real enemy is." Finnick reminded the girl on fire and at that moment realization washed over her. You could see it.

She looked at Beetee who was unconscious behind her. The coil was still there. She quickly picked it up, wrapping it around her arrow before pointing it at the sky.

At that moment both fear and adrenaline washed over you. She was going to blow up the arena once the lightning strikes the tree.

"Katniss!" Finnick's voice rang out. "Get away from that tree!"

You started to panic. You were getting out of time. Finnick, Katniss, Beetee and you were the only ones who came. Johanna was nowhere to be found. Peeta didn't return yet. Your ever racing mind pushed you to run towards Finnick as fast as you could.

"Katniss, get away from that tree!" Finnick's voice rang out once more before you saw it.

Katniss pointed at the sky, the lightning striked the tree and she let the arrow fly.

The last thing that you saw was the bright light from the lightning, a bloody screams that left Katniss' and your mouths and a painful grunt from the love of your life before the mere force of the lightnings hit sent you flying into the trees behind you before the darkness overtook you.

°

Once you woke up everything was hurting you. You felt so numb. You felt so numb yet you somehow felt everything. It was truly horrific.

The oxygen mask was planted onto your face as your eyes scanned the unknown territory. Everything was white and so clean. You turned your head to the side and spotted Katniss Everdeen, still knocked out beside you, and Beetee, not that far away from you. He was still unconscious, too. At that moment, you felt panic arise in your chest, consuming you. Where was Finnick?

You violently ripped the oxygen mask from your face as you stood up, ignoring the sharp pain that traveled across your body. What were you going to do? You patted your thigh, but your knife was gone. You knew that you weren't thinking rationally, but you never did when it came to him.

You spotted a see-through box a few feet away from you. A syringe was in there. It was filled with an unknown liquid, but you guessed that someone knocked you unconscious with this so you took the risk as you placed the syringe in the palm of your hand.

You strolled silently towards the door. You jumped a bit as the door suddenly opened. You raised the syringe in the air, ready to attack anyone who stood behind the door if you needed to.

You felt yourself slowly lowering the syringe in your hand as you saw who stood in front of you. Haymitch and Plutarch Heavensbee. You made it. You were relatively safe. But not seeing Finnick didn't calm your nerves. If anything it just fueled the fire in your veins.

"Where is Finnick?" You hissed out, your voice dangerously lowered that you scared yourself for a brief moment. You knew that you probably looked like a mad woman, but you didn't really find it in yourself to care.

"Y/N." Haymitch slowly approached you, he raised his hands in the air in front of him as an attempt to both calm you down and show you that he won't hurt you. "He's here. On the chair, he's still unconscious."

You turned to look at the side that Haymitch was pointing at and there he was. In a blue shirt that was too big for him. You threw the syringe onto the desk in the middle of the room as you stared at him. Relief washing over you like the waves back at your District.

"What happened while I was out?" You asked Haymitch waiting for an explanation as you didn't take your eyes off of Finnick.

"We couldn't rescue Johanna and Peeta." Haymitch sighed, he was obviously afraid that you would try to attack again and this time succeed after you hear the news that he had for you. "They still have trackers in their arms. We cut Finnick's, Beetee's and yours out after we rescued you."

He stopped here and you waited. You waited for his words to finally hit you.

"The Capitol took Peeta and Johanna."

Out of nowhere, the darkness overtook you once again. The last thing you remember was Haymitch catching you in his arms and Finnick yelling out your name.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, sweet dream was over

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

Always remember

Uh-huh, tears on the letter

I vowed not to cry anymore

If we survived the Great War

The room of the hospital wing at District 13 was dimly lit. The cold metal walls of one of the hospital rooms felt like they were closing in on you, cutting the space for you to breath. Perhaps that was one of the reasons as to why your breaths came in ragged gasps as you suddenly woke up from your state. You sat up in your bed, sweat-soaked and still trembling. Another nightmare. The same one that haunted your every dream, every night, since the first night that you left the arena from your games. The arena, the blood, the faces of those you had to kill. Everything came back to haunt you once again.

Suddenly the door slid open with a harsh, quick movement.

Finnick slept in the room next door. You knew he was there, even before you heard the footsteps approaching. Pretty soon your suspicions were proven to be correct. There he was, shirtless and disheveled, concern etched on his face.

"Y/N." He whispered, crossing the room in a few strides. His arms enveloped you, pulling your crying, shaking form close to him providing the protection that you needed. "Another nightmare?"

You felt yourself nod, burying your face in his chest as you tried your hardest to just dissappear. His skin was warm against your cold, tear stained cheek, a stark contrast to the icy memories that plagued you.

"I can't escape them, Finnick." Your voice shook, a sob at the tip of your lips. "Their screams, the blood... everything. I relive it each and every night since that year."

He held you tighter, his fingers tracing soothing circles on your back.

"You're safe here now, darling." He murmured. "We're in 13. The Capitol can't touch us here." He talked, as if he tried to remind you where you are right now, trying to pull you away from the horrific nightmare that he was oh so familiar with himself.

"The guilt is eating me alive." Your voice cracked, a silent tear sliding down your cheek. "I killed them. How can I possibly live with that?"

Finnick tilted your chin up, forcing you to meet his gaze. His sea-green eyes bore into yours, fierce and unwavering.

"My love, listen to me." His soft voice spoke to you. "We all did what we had to do. The Games were a nightmare, but we made it out. We're alive."

"But at what cost?" Tears welled up, threatening to spill. "I can't forget their faces. The ones I killed. The ones that I left behind..."

"You promised me something, remember?" He wiped a lost tear away with his thumb. "Back before I was forced to send you into that arena alone. You promised me that you will survive and come back to me. You did."

"I know, but-"

"No buts." His voice was firm, it reminded you of the time that he trained you before you went into the arena for the first time. Back when you two were just a mentor and a tribute, nothing more. "You're so much stronger than you think you are, love. We all carry scars, but they don't define us. I want you to promise me something now."

"And that is?" You asked him as you kept your eyes on him.

"Promise me that you won't cry anymore. Not because of the Capitol or the nightmares. We survived, Y/N. And we'll keep surviving."

You hesitated, but then you nodded. "I promise."

"Good. Now get some rest. I'll be right here when you wake up." Finnick pressed his lips to your forehead, a gentle kiss that sent warmth through your veins.

As you settled back against the pillows, his arms were still wrapped around you, giving you sense of protection you came to a realization that maybe you could find comfort in the darkness that seemed to constantly try to consume you. With Finnick by your side, the nightmares seemed less terrifying, and the promise that you made him that night felt like it will last a lifetime.

And so, in the quiet of that hospital room in District 13, underground, you closed your eyes, vowing to keep your promise. No more fear, you knew that you would be all right as long as your love was next to you.

You drew up some good faith treaties

I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone

You said I have to trust more freely

But diesel is desire, you were playin' with fire

And maybe it's the past that's talkin'

Screamin' from the crypt

Tellin' me to punish you for things you never did

So I justified it

The sterile white walls of District 13's hospital pressed in on you, suffocating you, stripping you of fresh air that your lungs needed right now. You sat at the edge of your hospital bed, your fingers tracing the material of the purple medical bracelet around your waist that said that you were "Mentally disoriented". The label of the chaos that boiled within you.

The doctors came and went, you heard their voices, but they didn't reach your brain, your messed up mind. They offered so many pills, you didn't even know what pill was for what anymore. They offered therapy sessions and worst of all, sympathetic glances. They looked at you like you were broken and you were, but you hated it with burning passion. Yet after all of that, you couldn't trust them. Not after everything that you went through. The arena, the cruelty of the Capitol, the loss of your friends. The nightmares that still clung to you like shadows, following your every step, and the darkness that constantly threatened to swallow you whole.

Finnick sat beside you. His hand brushed against yours, a silent reassurance. His eyes held a depth of understanding. The kind of understanding that came only from someone who survived the horrors too immense to name.

"You don't have to face this alone." He said softly. His voice was your lifeline, pulling you back from the endless abyss. "Y/N, let them help you."

"They don't understand, Finnick." You whispered in the quietness of the room. "They can't understand."

"Maybe not, but I do." His thumb traced circles on your palm.

"Finnick, I-" You met his gaze, the weight of your pain reflected in his sea-green eyes.

Before you could finish, though, he leaned in, pressing his lips to yours. It was a desperate kiss, fueled by fear and longing. His mouth tasted of salt and the sea.

"Don't shut me out." He murmured against your lips, his voice sweater then honey. "I can't lose you, too."

"I'm broken, Finnick." Tears welled up blurring your vision.

"No." He said fiercely. "You're not broken. You're a survivor. And you're mine."

Finnick pulled you into his arms, holding you as if you were fragile glass. His heartbeat echoed against your chest, a rhythm of hope.

"Promise me." He whispered. "Promise me that you won't try to leave me behind again."

The memory of the razor blade, the cold metal against your skin, haunted you. You'd wanted an escape, a way to silence the screams of your fellow tributes that echoed in your mind. But the doctors had intervened, wrestling the blade from your trembling hand.

"I promise." You choked out. "But what if I can't keep it?"

"Then I'll be here." He vowed, his grip on your hands tightened. "Every step of the way. We'll fight this darkness together."

And so, in the sterile hospital room that you were forced to stay in, Finnick and you clung to each other. The fragile threads of two broken souls entwined. Finnick's love was a lifeline, pulling you back from the blink. You closed your eyes, willing yourself to believe that survival was possible. Even when the nightmares threatened to consume you.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, the bombs were close and

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

Always remember

Uh-huh, the burning embers

I vowed not to fight anymore

If we survived the Great War

Uh-huh

Uh-huh

The air was thick with tension, the walls of District 13 trembling as the Capitol’s bombs rained down upon them. Finnick now stood alongside you, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist. His sea-green eyes were filled with worry, and you could feel the rapid beat of his heart against your chest once again.

The lockdown sirens blared, drowning out the screams of panic echoing through the corridors. People rushed past you, seeking shelter, but you and Finnick remained rooted to the spot. The world outside seemed to blur as you clung to each other, seeking solace in the midst of chaos.

“Y/N.” Finnick whispered, his lips brushing against your temple. “We’ll get through this. Somehow we always do.”

You nodded, your fingers tracing the contours of his face. His stubble scratched against your skin, a familiar sensation that grounded you. The Capitol had taken so much from both of you—the Games, the torture, the loss—but here, in this moment, you had each other.

The bombs continued to fall, shaking the ground beneath your feet. You pressed your cheek against Finnick’s chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his breathing. His hand slid down to your lower back, holding you close as if he could shield you from the destruction outside.

“I love you.” you murmured, your voice barely audible over the chaos everywhere around you. “After all this is over, I promise I won’t fight anymore. No more battles, no more bloodshed.”

Finnick’s grip tightened. “Y/N, you don’t have to—”

“No.” You interrupted. “I mean it. We’ve both seen enough violence, lost enough people. If we survive this war, I want a different life. A peaceful one. With you.”

His eyes searched yours, and for a moment, it felt like the world had stopped spinning.

“A peaceful life...” he repeated, as if testing the words. “Together.”

“Together.” You nodded, your heart swelling with determination.

And so, as the bombs continued to fall, you made a silent vow. You would survive this war, not for the rebellion or for justice, but for the chance to hold Finnick Odair in your arms without fear. To build a future where love could flourish, where scars could heal, and where promises were kept.

In the chaos of District 13’s lockdown, you clung to each other, two souls battered by the storm. But love was your anchor, and as long as you had that, you knew you could weather anything—even the wrath of the Capitol.

It turned into something bigger

Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed

Your finger on my hair pin triggers

Soldier down on that icy ground

Looked up at me with honor and truth

Broken and blue, so I called off the troops

That was the night I nearly lost you

I really thought I lost you

The hallway was dimly lit, the flickering fluorescent bulbs casting eerie shadows on the cold metal walls. You stood there, your heart pounding in your chest, waiting for Finnick. The room where the victors were supposed to meet felt like a prison. A place where memories of the Games and the Capitol’s cruelty still lingered.

The rebellion had succeeded. The Capitol was in chaos, its once-mighty regime crumbling. But victory came at a cost. The mutts, the twisted, genetically engineered creatures, had nearly taken Finnick from you. Katniss had told you about it, her voice raw with emotion. How he’d fought tooth and nail, how he’d almost been torn apart.

And now, as you waited, your fingers trembling, you couldn’t shake the image of his bloodied form from your mind. The way he’d looked at you before leaving for that final mission, the promise in his eyes, the unspoken words that he will return to you alive, in one piece. You’d clung to that promise, held it close like a fragile flame in the darkest of nights.

The door creaked open, and there he was, Finnick Odair, the boy with the sea-green eyes and the tragic past. His hair was disheveled, his skin pale, but he was alive. He stepped into the hallway, and you rushed to him, throwing your arms around his neck. His scent, the salt of the sea that carried itself back from your home, the tang of sweat, filled your senses, and you buried your face in the crook of his shoulder.

“Finnick.” you whispered, your voice breaking. “You’re here. You’re alive.”

His arms tightened around you, and for a moment, you forgot about the war, the mutts, the bloodshed. It was just the two of you, clinging to each other like shipwreck survivors in a stormy sea.

“I promised, didn’t I?” His voice was hoarse, but there was a hint of a smile. “I always keep my promises.”

You pulled away, your hands delicately framing his face. His cheek was bruised, a gash running along his jawline. But his eyes, they held a fierce determination, a fire that refused to be extinguished.

“You idiot!” you said, your voice trembling. “You almost died.”

“But I didn’t. And I won’t. Not as long as you’re here.” He leaned down, pressing his forehead against yours.

Tears welled up in your eyes, and you kissed him, desperate, hungry, as if you could swallow away the pain, the fear, the memories. His lips were warm, tasting of salt and survival. And in that kiss, you made a silent vow, a promise of your own.

“After this war...” you whispered against his mouth, “we’ll find a place where the sea meets the sky. Somewhere far from the Capitol, far from the Games. We’ll heal, Finnick. Together.”

He kissed you again, and this time, it was slow, tender. “Together.” he murmured. “Always.”

And so, in the hallway of broken dreams, you held each other, two fractured souls seeking solace. The victors’ meeting could wait. For now, all that mattered was this fragile moment, the taste of salt, the warmth of love, and the promise of a future beyond the horrors of Panem.

We can plant a memory garden

Say a solemn prayer, place a poppy in my hair

There's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair

And we will never go back

The air in District 13 was thick with tension as the rebels gathered to witness the execution of President Snow. The Capitol had fallen, and the weight of years of suffering and loss hung heavily on everyone's shoulders. Finnick, like always, stood beside you. His hand found yours, fingers intertwining as you both faced the president.

The crowd murmured, their collective breaths held. The noose tightened around Snow's neck, and the man who had orchestrated so much pain and death finally met his end. You didn't feel relief; instead, a hollow emptiness settled within you. The cycle of violence had consumed too many lives, and you wondered if it would ever truly end.

After the execution, you and Finnick retreated to your small quarter that was given to you at the presidential palace. You packed the few belongings you had left, folding clothes and tucking away mementos. Finnick watched you, his eyes shadowed by the ghosts of the arena.

"Y/N." he said softly, breaking the silence. "We've survived so much. But now… maybe it's time for something different."

You turned to face him, your heart aching. "Different how?"

He stepped closer, cupping your cheek. "Peace, Y/N. We've fought, bled, and lost. Maybe it's time we find our own peace."

His words resonated within you. You thought of the horrors you'd witnessed—the Hunger Games, the rebellion, the deaths of friends. The scars ran deep, and you wondered if healing was even possible.

As if sensing your turmoil, Finnick pulled you into his arms. His embrace was both tender and desperate.

"We finally get to leave." he murmured against your hair. "Find a quiet place in 4, away from the chaos. Somewhere we can heal."

"But Katniss…" you began, thinking of the broken girl who had become the Mockingjay.

Finnick kissed your forehead. "Katniss will find her way. She's strong. And she has Peeta."

°

The next morning, you stood with Finnick on the platform in front of the train that would take you to District 4. Katniss approached, her eyes red-rimmed from grief and exhaustion. You took her hands, feeling the weight of her pain.

"Katniss, don't do this to yourself anymore, I beg you." Your soft voice reached her ears. "After everything… we'll try to find the peace we all deserve. I hope you find it too."

"Also, there is something that Finnick and I wanted to let you know before we leave the Capitol." you said gently.

She looked at you, her expression wary.

"I'm pregnant." you announced and Finnick's grip on your waist tightened.

Katniss blinked, surprise flickering across her face. "Pregnant?"

"Yes." you confirmed. "And Finnick and I… we've had enough bloodshed. It's time for us to find peace. Back at 4. Because we both know that we can't do it here at the Capitol."

Katniss's lips trembled. "Take care of each other." she whispered. "And write to me. Tell me whatever you need."

"We will." Finnick promised, placing a hand on her shoulder as he spoke. "And Katniss, find your own peace too. You deserve it the most."

As the train pulled away, you glanced back at Katniss. She stood there, a lone figure, watching you both leave. The world outside blurred, and you clung to Finnick's hand, knowing that this journey was about more than survival, it was about reclaiming life, love, and hope.

Together, you and Finnick leaned against the window, watching the landscape rush by. The Capitol, the districts, and the scars of war faded into the distance. Ahead lay an uncertain future, but for the first time, it felt like freedom.

And as the train carried you away, you whispered to the wind.

"Peace, Katniss. May you find it too."

To that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, the worst was over

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

Always remember

Uh-huh, we're burned for better

I vowed I would always be yours

'Cause we survived the Great War

The sun dipped low on the horizon, casting a warm golden glow over the coast. You sat on the weathered driftwood, your sundress billowing in the breeze. The waves crashed against the shore, a rhythmic lullaby that matched the beat of your heart.

Finnick was out there, his laughter carried by the wind. He chased their little daughter, her giggles like music. She had his sea-green eyes and your stubborn spirit. Her tiny feet left imprints in the wet sand, and you watched them both, the man you loved and the child you'd brought into this world.

His white shirt clung to his chest, the fabric darkened by saltwater. His light brown pants were soaked, but he didn't care. Finnick had always been at home in the sea, a merman with secrets hidden beneath his skin.

You traced the delicate band on your finger, the wedding ring. The day you'd vowed to be one with Finnick forever played in your mind. The sun had been just as golden then, and the waves had whispered promises. You'd said "I do" with the ocean as your witness, and it felt like the universe itself had blessed your union.

Beside you layed Katniss' letter. Her words echoed in your head, a mix of sorrow and hope. She'd lost so much, fought so hard. But now, finally, there was peace. Peeta was by her side, both of them were healing together. The Mockingjay had found her song and it was a bittersweet melody.

You closed your eyes, feeling the salt spray on your skin. The sea had witnessed your love, your pain, and your victories. It had taken so much from you, the Games, the rebellion, the scars etched into your soul. But it had also given you Finnick, your anchor in this tumultuous world.

As if sensing your thoughts, Finnick approached. His hair was tousled, his smile soft. He sat beside you, your daughter nestled in his arms. She clutched a seashell, her eyes wide with wonder.

"She's growing up so fast." you murmured, leaning into Finnick's warmth.

"Too fast." He kissed your temple.

You glanced at the horizon. The sun was a fiery ball, sinking into the water. "Katniss wrote that Peeta and her found peace."

"It's about time." Finnick nodded.

"We've all shed enough blood for an eternity, perhaps even more than that." You rested your head on his shoulder.

He intertwined his fingers with yours. "Maybe now we can heal."

The waves whispered their agreement. You looked at your daughter, at the man who'd become your heart.

"We'll find our peace too, won't we?"

Finnick pressed his lips to your forehead. "After everything… we deserve it."

And as the sea sang its ancient song, you knew that love, like the tides, would flow. But here, by the coast, with Finnick and your daughter, you found solace. The wedding ring glinted in the fading light, a promise etched in metal.

Katniss's words echoed once more:

"May you find peace."

And you believed that you finally had.

Uh-huh

Uh-huh

I would always be yours

'Cause we survived the Great War

Uh-huh

I vowed I would always be yours

->

->

->

TAGLIST:

@randomgurl2326 @caroline-books @hellonheels-x @livingdead-reilly @thecrowdedstreetin1944

[httpswritings]

The Great War — Katie McCabe x Reader

Additional info: Story inspired Taylor Swift’s The Great War. I’m in my Katie era, but I’m also planning on writing about other players, especially Alexia, which I have like four ideas to write about. We’ll see. I also have a draft of Ruesha x Katie inspired in Moth to a flame by The Weeknd, but I’m doubting about posting it or not. Maybe in the future I’ll write a Caitlin x Katie fic, but I don't have a clear vision of them yet to properly write about them.

Warnings: Mentions of anxiety, throwing up and therapy, sensitive topics overall, avoid reading if you find them triggering. Angsty Katie.

Word count: 1691

Right after Katie ended her relationship with Caitlin Foord, she met Y/N. After some time, they got into a relationship together. They enjoyed every single second of the magical connection they seemed to have. With the passing of time, Katie became more and more anxious about her relationship with Y/N. She doubted she could be what Y/N deserved, even though her girlfriend took her time every day to remind Katie that she's never been as happy in a relationship as she was with her.

«My knuckles were bruised like violets

Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked»

Two heartbreaks in such a little time, with both her Ireland National Team's member Ruesha and girlfriend of seven years, and her Arsenal's teammate Caitlin Foord, who was her girlfriend during half a year, made the Irishwoman insecure about her ability to love, to trust, to have a happy fairytale ending. Katie knew these thoughts would damage her relationship with Y/N, but she couldn't help but to spend most of her day tracking every single detail that built her relationship to the obsessive point where she felt absolutely sick of herself.

«Spineless in my tomb of silence

Tore your banners down, took the battle underground»

When she reached her limit, she told Y/N about what was going on. Y/N responded well and helped Katie, and it started well. Really well. But after some time, Katie fell back into a cycle of doubt and anxiety, and those sensations kept growing when she noticed any change in Y/N's mood, as she took it too personally. This made her re-experience in her mind those moments of stress while she was with Ruesha or Caitlin.

«And maybe it was ego swinging

Maybe it was her

Flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur»

Y/N tried to understand her, she tried and tried but eventually, she reached her limit.

“I want to help you. I really do. But I can't continue like this. I'm not Ruesha, nor I am Caitlin. I am aware that being in a new relationship it's difficult for you, so maybe we should take things a bit slower. I don't mean to take a break, but maybe I should go back to my flat. We will move on slower than we did before, but I do think it's the only way to work it out.”

«All that bloodshed, crimson clover

Sweet dream was over»

“Yeah, maybe you're right´”, that was Katie's only response. Y/N limited herself to sigh. That night, Katie slept alone in her bed. Her body reacting to the cold sheets and crying herself to sleep.

«My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War»

Sweet morning messages from Y/N, “Good morning, baby. Do good at training today! Love you ;)”

Surprise visits from Y/N, lovely gifts, usually handmade ones, brought Katie to tears as she felt endlessly loved.

«Always remember

Tears on the letter

I vowed not to cry anymore

If we survived the Great War»

Katie prayed for things to get back as they were during the first months of the relationship. The feeling of her not being a good girlfriend to Y/N haunted her even in her sleep.

«You drew up some good faith treaties

I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone»

Y/N suggested going to a therapist together, but Katie was unsure about that. She thought that if she couldn't quite open to her girlfriend about her feelings and thoughts, she wouldn't be able to talk about what was bothering her to a therapist. Such a huge contrast between the two parts of the relationship that drew them even more apart.

«You said I have to trust more freely

But diesel is desire, you were playing with fire

And maybe it's the past that's talkin'

Screamin' from the crypt

Tellin' me to punish you for things you never did

So I justified it»

“No, I'm sorry, but I'm not doing this. I feel uncomfortable talking to a stranger about our issues.”

“I know, baby, I was just suggesting it. Let me explain you why. We are aware of having some problems in our relationship, but we don't really know how to get through it. We've tried and things keep getting worse. Maybe talking to someone who's out of our relationship can make this whole situation clearer for the both of us.”

«All that bloodshed, crimson clover

The bombs were close and

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

Always remember

The burning embers

I vowed not to fight anymore

If we survived the Great War»

Katie took some weeks to meditate Y/N´s idea. She was terrified of being judged by the therapist they would talk to. Even more scared of Y/N realizing she didn't do any good to her. Eventually, she agreed.

“Maybe she's right. People attend therapy sessions. It's normal, Katie. It's normal”, she said to herself.

«It turned into something bigger

Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed»

Katie was not new to getting help from a therapist. She was very open about her mental health in different areas of her life, whether that included football or not. The first time she attended a therapy session was when she was a teenager. It went well, so did the first sessions with Anna, Katie's and Y/N´s psychologist.

Making progress is not a linear process, and making mistakes is a part of the success. Mistakes are a victory in themselves, it means that you're still trying. One day, Katie had an individual session with Anna. Anna felt it was Katie's time to open about her two past relationships; a young adult romance that lasted for more than half a decade and a short but intense romance of one year after a breakup.

It was a slow conversation filled with many pauses from Katie.

“Are you gonna tell Y/N what I'm telling you?”

“No, Katie. This stays between me and you”, said Anna.

As Katie told her her experiences in love, she broke down.

The wall she had built, in order to avoid being hurt and judged, collapsed in that therapy room.

“Don't be afraid to cry. You have nothing to prove to me nor to Y/N. This is about you and your healing process. Y/N will help you and accompany you, but it's crucial for you to work on yourself, especially being a public figure.”

«Your finger on my hair pin triggers»

As Katie arrived home, she unlocked her phone and asked Y/N to come over.

“I've asked Anna, and she told me it was a good initiative and a great way of gaining some independence in our relationship, leaving her out of it for a while. Don't feel obliged to!”

“I am exhausted, baby. Work was something else today, and I’m a little bit irritated because of it, lol. Maybe another time? Love you.”

As Katie was about to spiral, she remembered Anna's advice. She breathed deeply. Y/N was setting her boundaries. She trusted Katie enough to tell her the truth and not to make any excuses. She felt tired from work. Y/N is not mad at her. She didn't do anything wrong. Everything’s okay.

«Soldier down on that icy ground

Looked up at me with honor and truth

Broken and blue, so I called off the troops»

The next day Katie woke up to a text from Y/N.

“Good morning, princess. I had a great sleep, what about you? How did you sleep? I’m up to seeing you today if you feel like it. Love you.”

Still slightly asleep, she smiled.

“I can't wait to see you today, beautiful girl. I had a good sleep, too. Good to have the bed all to myself ;))”

She frowned after sending the text with that joke at the end.

“Breath, Katie, let these useless thoughts pass. Both you and Y/N feel comfortable teasing each other”, said Katie to herself.

“Ha, ha, really funny. We both know you missed having me snoring next to you.”

“How do you know?!?!”

«That was the night I nearly lost you

I really thought I lost you»

As Katie was preparing herself to go out with Y/N to have lunch, she remembered the night where Y/N left her house.

She doesn't freak out to the thought of it, but instead she does an exercise of introspection. She sees herself in her mind, almost throwing up, completely emotionally depending on her girlfriend while pushing her away and bottling up her feelings.

«We can plant a memory garden

Say a solemn prayer, place a poppy in my hair

There's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair

And we will never go back

To that bloodshed, crimson clover

The worst was over»

Now she looks at herself in the mirror. She sees herself, Katie, as the woman who knows that she's loved, and she's deserving of being it. The woman who respects her girlfriend’s boundaries and doesn't freak out at the tiniest change that she perceives. The woman who's going to take her girlfriend out to have a good time having lunch, not worrying about anything but what order she's going to have.

«My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

Always remember

We're burned for better

I vowed I would always be yours

'Cause we survived the Great War

I would always be yours

'Cause we survived the Great War

I vowed I would always be yours»

As they arrived home back from the restaurant, Y/N walked towards Katie.

“I’m so proud of you, baby. You did this. You are doing it every day. I’m so excited to see where our relationship leads us to.”

As Katie sobbed, she softly laughed, “It’s nice to cry sometimes. God, I feel so relieved. I’m so proud of myself, too, of us! Thank you for being there for me, Y/N, thank you. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life as your girlfriend.”

“Even when you'll wake up to my snoring?”

“Especially when I'll wake up to your snoring.”

[f1letters]

the great war | dr3

"my hand was the one you reached for all throughout the Great War"

summary: after the media was filled with cheating rumours involving her husband, she faced hard times trying to rebuild what was left of their relationship

warning: angst, mentions of cheating allegations, the other woman involved has a name (Skylar James is a fictional character), lack of trust, temporary separation between a married couple, fluff ending

pairing: daniel ricciardo x reader

word count: 3.9k

note: everything in bold are song references and in italic are thoughts, which includes memories from the past, and a public statement.

I'm sorry I took this long to post it, but I'm so happy I was still able to finish this today as I initially promised! hope you enjoy this one!

masterlist

My knuckles were bruised like violets

Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked

Spineless in my tomb of silence

Tore your banners down, took the battle underground

And maybe it was egos swinging

Maybe it was her

Flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur

Isn't it sad how in a blink of an eye one single person can destroy your entire world?

Y/N felt exactly like at that moment. Her floor had collapsed, the walls around her had caved in, her roof had fallen on top of her.

She couldn't believe what her eyes were reading on the small screen she held in her hands. A thousand unanswered questions, a thousand unexplained feelings, a thousand screams trapped in her throat.

I might be sleeping still, this is a nightmare, it has to be, she thought as she looked for an excuse. 

After all, it all started when she woke up in the middle of the night and decided to pick up her phone, expecting to see a message from her husband that should be on his way home after a week of work. 

What she didn't expect was to have so many texts from her friends and family, and complete radio silence from the person who held all the answers she was looking for.

"Daniel Ricciardo caught in 'cheating' storm after an eventful night in Miami"

"McLaren's Daniel Ricciardo packs on the PDA with American model amid divorce rumours"

"SINGLE HONEYBADGER: everything we know about the Australian driver's wild night behind his wife's back"

"Divorce? Ricciardo seen with woman in Miami club... Spoiler alert: it wasn't Y/N Ricciardo"

It was everywhere.

In every magazine, every gossip page, every social media platform.

They were photos of her husband at a nightclub, clear as day. She couldn't deny it. She could recognize the distinctive curls of his hair, the characteristic smile that was always plastered on his face, and the shape of his body that she knew as if it were her own.

There was something that she couldn't recognize though. Maybe it was her. 

Model body, long red hair, short white dress that reflected the purple lights of the bar. And especially Daniel's arms wrapped around a body that wasn't hers, but some other girl who was grabbing her husband's neck, with one hand straying through his hair, just as she had done dozens of times before.

She never felt like this. Somewhere in the haze of the media, she could only get a sense that she'd been betrayed.

She stayed like that for hours. Reading all the news, seeing all the photos, looking at all the comments. It wasn't at all what she needed at that moment. But in an act of masochism and in the absence of the man she loved, she stayed there, seated against the headboard of their king-sized bed, in the cold of dawn, all alone in the house the couple had called home for so many years.

Completely destroyed from the inside out.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, sweet dream was over

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

What a fool, her mind kept repeating. But what to expect from a relationship that has advanced at lightning speed?

She still remembered the day they met as if it were yesterday, and she was perfectly aware that it was a moment she would never forget, no matter what happened.

No matter how much of the world she might travel, Canada was always going to be her home, right next to the people she loved.

One of them being her childhood best friend Chloe Stroll, with all her craziness and her giant heart. No one in the world understood Y/N better than the singer, and it had always been that way from the moment they became friends at the young age of 7.

The two of them were sitting on the terrace of Y/N's favourite Italian restaurant in the beautiful city of Montreal. 

It all started when Chloe wanted to introduce her new boyfriend to her best friend. No relationship lasted without the seal of approval from the other half of the duo, so they both knew the importance of this meeting.

However, the two girls were taken by surprise when Scotty had the same idea and didn't show up alone, seeking the approval of his fellow Aussie friend. And what a surprise. Daniel simply stood out in the crowd, radiating from all sides like the star he was.

And without even realizing it, a casual lunch to celebrate the beginning of a relationship became a double date that symbolized the start of a whirlwind romance.

She had spent all day glued to Daniel, her eyes almost unable to remove themselves from his image. But the same thing happened on the other side: the driver couldn't have been more fascinated by her, something that provoked an exchange of suspicious glances between Chloe and Scotty, aware of the chemistry between their two friends.

And as crazy as it might sound to the people around them, in the space of nine months, the two of them were walking out of a church in Perth, hand in hand, wedding bands on their ring fingers, her in a long white dress, him in his best navy blue suit.

They couldn't care less about others' opinions and fears about their relationship. They were head over heels in love with each other and that was enough to be sure they were making the right decision.

However, at that moment, the young woman did not know if this was true.

She couldn't stop thinking about the countless times she'd been warned about the playboy fame her now-husband had before he met her. 

Did he really cheat on me? Had he done it other times before? Was it the end of us? Their dream love story was over.

The sound of the apartment's front door opening and closing brought her back to reality. 

It was him.

Always remember

Uh-huh, tears on the lеtter

I vowed not to cry anymore

If wе survived the Great War

Her body stayed still as she heard the sound of keys being placed on the kitchen counter and the suitcase being dropped on the floor in a hurry. But she just stood there, almost as if she was frozen in fear of facing reality.

The wooden door to their bedroom was opened and she immediately noticed Daniel standing at the bottom of the bed. His eyes were on his wife who, in return, couldn't even look in his direction, her gaze drawn to the white sheets that covered her body instead.

"Baby?" He broke the silence, his voice trembling.

She kept silent on the outside, but on the inside, her thoughts spoke too much. She searched for words to say, but sentences seemed impossible to form in the state she was in.

"I didn't do anything, I swear." He said, in a pleading tone. Y/N felt the mattress drop with the weight of Daniel's knee on it as he tried to get closer to her.

As soon as she felt his icy hand touch her thigh, she unconsciously reacted, pulling her body away from his touch, as if it burned like fire.

"Please." Daniel pleaded, revealing the pain her action had caused him. "Trust me, baby. Please. I didn't do anything." He repeated.

"It didn't look like that." The coldness in her voice was everything he didn't want to hear after the torture that had been the hours of silence during his flight from the United States to Monaco.

"She was trying to talk to me and I didn't think too much of it because she came with some of Lando's friends. You have nothing to worry about." He tried to justify himself. "The media is just exaggerating to sell some non-existent drama stories."

"Just exaggerating?!" She replied, with a louder volume than she perhaps intended, as she allowed herself to look at him for the first time. "Have you seen the photos? Can you imagine what people are saying about you? About me? I look like a fucking idiot."

"And so what they think like that?" His shoulders shrugged, in complete disinterest. "Let them talk. What matters here is that you and I know that these things are nothing more than ridiculous rumours."

"And do I know that?" He was sure he could hear his own heart break at the words coming out of his wife's mouth. "The issue here isn't what people say or don't say. What about me? What about my fucking feelings?!"

"You don't believe me. Is that what you're saying?" Daniel kept up with Y/N's change in tone and now also spoke angrily in his words.

"You've been playing with fire and now you expect me to sit here, watch this shit everywhere and still trust you blindly. How do you want me to believe that nothing happened when there's a bunch of photos of you clinging to some other woman?!" She rose from the bed, placing herself directly in front of him.

"Because we're married! Because I took a vow that I would be loyal to you until death do us part!" He yelled, taking a step closer to her, outraged at the lack of trust in him she was showing. "Because I fucking love you… That should be enough for you." He whispered, realizing they were walking a thin line.

You drew up some good faith treaties

I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone

You said I have to trust more freely

But diesel is desire, you were playing with fire

And maybe it's the past that's talking

Screaming from the crypt

Telling me to punish you for things you never did

So I justified it

As soon as the last sentence left the driver's mouth, he left the room and walked at a fast pace to the room, with Y/N following his path right behind him.

This is it, she thought when she saw him reach again for the suitcase he was carrying before. This is the end of us, right here.

"Where are you going?" Her voice cracked as tears threatened to escape her eyes.

"I'd better not spend the night here. If I stay, things will only escalate and I can't risk losing you because I said shit I shouldn't since I'm upset about this whole situation." Daniel admitted with his eyes mirroring hers, also in tears. Both were surrounded by fear and anger, even if it was for different reasons.

Her body physically ached when she saw his figure disappear through the door. She let her back lean against the hallway wall and descend until she sat on the tiled floor.

The only thing left for her to do was cry. And she did just that. For hours, she stayed there, crying uncontrollably, releasing all the hurt and heartbreak that consumed her.

Eventually, she gained enough courage to get up and walked over to their bed, trying to get some sleep. However, as exhausted as she felt, she spent the rest of the night awake, with the numbers on her nightstand's clock tormenting her, seeming to go slower and slower as time advanced.

She didn't even know where he was. Was he with Max? With Lando? With ... her? She didn't even want to think about that awful scenario, but God, it was hard not to wander in painful thoughts without him there to reassure her.

As soon as the woman saw "6 A.M." displayed on the alarm clock, she decided it was a waste of time to stay there, so she got up, sat on one of the benches on the marble kitchen island and prepared herself a bowl of cereal to eat.

She picked up her phone for the first time since her husband left the apartment and hadn't even unlocked it when she read two words: I'm sorry.

Two words from Chloe, not Daniel. And followed by a link from TMZ.

When she thought she couldn't get out of this with her soul more crushed, she read the title in very big and bold letters.

"EXCLUSIVE: Skylar James reveals all about scandalous affair with Daniel Ricciardo, model claims he cheated on his wife with her multiple times before"

That was the last nail in the coffin.

In a matter of minutes, Y/N packed a suitcase with some of her clothes and her essentials and was ready to leave that house towards her real home in Canada.

But not before she took off her engagement ring and her wedding band and left them both behind on the entryway table.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, the bombs were closer

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

Later that day, Daniel mustered up the courage to return to his wife, motivated by his friend, Max, with whom he had stayed overnight.

Such was his surprise and shock when he immediately sensed the silence that filled the house, her abandoned rings only confirming his greatest fear.

She was gone.

That silence lasted for weeks. Both were at extreme ends of the world, on different continents.

Daniel had to restrain himself from catching the next plane to Montreal, something he thought about doing dozens of times during those agonizing days of separation. But Scotty had been in contact with him, telling him that he and his fiancée Chloe were with the driver's partner and that he just needed to give her some time.

Until then, he could only dedicate himself to his career and racing as an escape from the real world.

The girl's absence from the paddock was not missed, especially by the media, who continued to sell stories on top of stories about the most scandalous topic of the moment in the motorsport world's gossip.

It was torture trying to avoid that subject day after day, knowing he had lost the love of his life to greedy people who were trying to make a career out of lies. It turned into something bigger unnecessarily, and he could only blame himself for being in that situation, even though he was also a victim of the whole thing.

That's how Daniel decided there was only one chance to work this out and try to win back his girl. And against the orders of the McLaren's PR team, he sat in his hotel room and released a statement about the false case on his social media, not knowing the consequences that could bring him.

They couldn't be worse than losing her.

For the first time in weeks, Y/N was able to breathe when she opened his Instagram story and read the words he wrote.

"Over the last few weeks, there have been a lot of rumours and lies spread around about my marriage and my alleged involvement with another woman.

I come here to clarify that I don't know that woman and that I have never cheated on my wife with her, or with any woman.

From the moment I met my partner, my life was completely dedicated to her. She is the most special woman in the world and I thank God every day that I was the lucky one chosen to be by her side.

I am the first to admit that the photographs published in the media look wrong and that I shouldn't have even let myself be put in that position. But not everything that appears to be true is true and I need to make clear again that all the claims made by the other person involved are pure fabrications.

My body and soul belong to my incredible, beautiful wife and I couldn't live another day without publicly asking for her forgiveness for the terrible position she was placed in through no fault of her own."

Reading that, she couldn't help but wonder if she shouldn't have trusted him more freely, if she hadn't punished him for things he never did.

At that moment she made the decision to return to Monaco. She wasn't ready to give up on their love just yet and to be defeated by this Great War.

Always remember

Uh-huh, the burning embers

I vowed not to fight anymore

If we survived the Great War

After 10 agonizing hours of travelling from Montreal to Monaco, Y/N finally found herself in front of the familiar door of the apartment where she had lived over the past years.

I was so unfair, this is my home, come what may, she thought.

She let herself in silently and walked slowly to the open room at the end of the hall, coming face to face with the image of Daniel, sitting on the foot of the bed, elbows on his knees, head in his hands.

He looked so distraught and so tired. It was evident he hadn't even heard her come in. The girl approached him cautiously and ran her hand gently through the brown curls of his hair as she crouched in front of him.

As soon as he felt her touch, a touch he could recognize anywhere in the world blindfolded, he looked at his wife. His eyes told her everything he was thinking about: the fear of losing her, the despair of someone who didn't know what else to do, the maddening love he felt for her and only her.

"You're here." He said, more to himself than to her. "You're really here."

"I am, baby." She gave him a weak smile, trying to reassure him that she'd come to make amends, not to fight anymore.

"I swear to you that I don't even know her, she showed up at that nightclub in Miami with some of Lando's friends. Everything that woman said is a lie. I never cheated on you, I could never do such a thing." He reached for her hand. "I am completely and truly obsessed with you. No person makes me feel the way you make me feel, and I would never put what we have at risk for anything in the world."

"I know, Danny." She leaned her forehead against his chest as they embraced each other. "I'm sorry I didn't trust you from the start. I don't care what she's been saying to the magazines. I know the man that you really are and that you would never do anything to hurt me on purpose."

"But that's the problem, Y/N. I still hurt you, even if I didn't mean to." Her husband grabbed her face with both of his hands, making her look him in the eye. "I'm the one who has to apologize to you."

"She was trying to say something to me at the club and she walked over to me so I could hear her. When I realized, she suddenly leaned over me and put her arms around my neck and I only had the reflex to grab her around the waist because I honestly thought she had lost her balance or something." He explained what really happened that night. "What I didn't realize was that she had a whole plan to spread those images on the internet in search of her five minutes of fame."

It turned into something bigger

Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed

Your finger on my hairpin triggers

Soldier down on that icy ground

Looked up at me with honor and truth

Broken and blue, so I called off the troops

That was the night I nearly lost you

I really thought I'd lost you

"We are going to be okay, baby." She said. He had looked at her with such a sense of honour and truth. There wasn't a shadow of a doubt in her head that he was being sincere.

Simultaneously, seeking each other's touch, Daniel and Y/N got up on their feet and hugged each other, making sure their bodies were as close as possible.

And they spent the rest of the afternoon like that, in each other's arms, in comfortable silence, just cherishing each other's presence, at peace at last.

We can plant a memory garden

Say a solemn prayer, place a poppy in my hair

There's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair

And we will never go back

When dinner time came, the couple ordered their usual Chinese takeaway, as they did every Friday when they were both at home, and sat on the sofa on their balcony while they ate under the beaming light of the sunset.

The only difference to the other Fridays was their phones. Instead of being a part of their conversation as they showed each other videos or photos from their week, this time they chose to turn them off and leave them in their dresser drawer so they couldn't be distracted by the outside world.

These were the moments that made it all worthwhile. These moments of peace, comfort and love all outweighed the war.

"I really thought I'd lost you, you know." She said, as she put her head on his shoulder, sighing. "I've never been so afraid in my life."

To that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, the worst was over

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

He looked at her, appreciating every little detail on her face, from the small scar she had above her eyebrow to the delicate mole she had on her chin.

After experiencing the world without her, Daniel knew that life would never be as colourful as with his lover by his side.

"You could never lose me, baby." He placed a small kiss on her lips. "It's me and you against the world, forever and always."

Always remember

Uh-huh, we're burned for better

I vowed I would always be yours

'Cause we survived the Great War

Although they didn't need validation from others to make them feel good about their decision to stay together, after a few weeks, the truth eventually came out.

Y/N was getting out of the shower when she got a call from her best friend.

"Hey, Chloe!" The girl said excitedly.

"Y/N, you're not going to believe what just happened." Chloe was always up to date with everything that was going on, but Y/N couldn't help but fear what was coming, especially after the painful weeks she had thanks to digital rumours.

"Skylar was just exposed on Instagram by a 'friend'. She leaked some audios that show it was all a set-up to take advantage of Daniel." Y/N couldn't believe karma worked so fast. "She apparently joined Lando's friends to get into the club but she didn't even know them at all! Can you believe the audacity of this girl?"

Without warning, Y/N disconnected the call, wrapped a towel around her body and ran to Daniel who was in the living room playing PlayStation. 

She quickly told him everything that had happened and it was possible to see the driver breathe a sigh of relief when he realized that his reputation was clean again.

Time had stopped when his lips found hers, making her knees go weak. Everything about him consumed her. Her focus was only on him and how he invaded her every sense.

"I vowed I would always be yours." He reminded her, as he leaned his forehead against hers, both of them with their eyes closed in a gesture of calm and tranquillity. "I love you more than anything in this world. You know that, right? We survived the Great War, Y/N Ricciardo."

I will always be yours

'Cause we survived the Great War

I vow I will always be yours

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thank you to everyone that asked to be tagged! please let me know if you want to be added to the next stories! 💌

[ultralightpoe]

The Great War - Aemond Targaryen

The Great War - Aemond Targaryen

Authors Note: I AM SO HAPPY ABOUT SPEAK NOW! YES!

Warnings: death, cheating, a dragon is killed

Word Count: 2841

The MIDNIGHTS event! (Take a look if you love Taylor Swift) and the upcoming SOUR event (requests for that one are still open so send em in!

Enjoy!

My knuckles were bruised like violets

Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked

Spineless in my tomb of silence

Tore your banners down, took the battle underground

And maybe it was ego swinging

Maybe it was her

Flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur

It was funny how much one's life could change within moments. You had never thought you would be here, there had been a time where you absolutely refused the thought of hurting your family or your husband, let alone fighting in a war you had been a pawn to stop in the first place. 

And yet, here you were. 

Covered in blood, head to toe, your hair matted and greased in the braid not that anything but bloodstains really showed. Your armor was black, like your father's armor had been, and the banner you stood by was that of blood red. 

There was apart of your mind that screamed for you to stop, to find a way for peace, just as your grandfather requested. But you pushed that thought away as your sword tore across a mans stomach, slashing into his guts and tearing the green banner from his hands. 

This battlefield was yours now. 

“How lovely of you to join me, dear husband.” You laugh, moving up to where he was hidden, ready to jump out and scare you. 

“You take all my fun, wife.” 

“Not all of it, I am sure.” There is a flash of something on his face that you don’t recognize for a moment, both of you just standing there and staring at each other. You debate if he knew someone had told you, and he must be here to explain himself. 

He had to have known the Queen of Whispers sent you a raven on his whereabouts, everything about his affair with Alys Rivers, and your heart began speeding up. 

You would tell him it was fine, if he asked. You would not be mad. Your mother had made you swear to this marriage for peace in the realm, a realm she would be queen of within days. You could not lose it now. 

But he doesn’t confront you, instead he walks up smoothly and places his lips upon yours in the softest of kisses before pulling your forehead to his own and rubbing your cheeks with his thumbs. “How about a dragon ride today? Hmm?”

“I was actually wishing to sit with my grandfather- since he is sick I think it necessary to-” His lips are on yours before you can finish your sentence, allowing yourself to melt into his touch some more. The rumors about Alys couldn’t be true, not when he loved you so….. “A dragon ride sounds lovely.”

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, sweet dream was over

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

Always remember

Uh-huh, tears on the letter

I vowed not to cry anymore

If we survived the Great War

He could sense you on the battlefield. As he always sensed when you were near before this. 

It had been an odd trait of his, always knowing where you were lurking and following. Where most people ignored you like a shadow he couldn’t help but see you. You had been his light. 

“I want that Targaryen bitches head!!” A shout behind him has him whirling with his sword until it’s pressed on the man's throat, the sharpness of the blade slicing his neck until blood leaks down his neck. 

“She. Is. Mine.” The man nods , gasping when the blade is taken away as Aemond turns back to the battlefield. 

“She’s announced she wants your head…” Another soldier murmurs, watching your army hit another barrier of his people. 

You want me so badly, wife? Come and get me.

The throne room looked dull and empty, the sunlight barely peeking through what windows were not covered as Aemond stares at the floor before him. 

The guilt was something he never expected. 

It’s not like he wanted to marry you, it had simply been for peace amongst the family, and he already had a relationship with Alys Rivers long before you swore yourself to him. So why shouldn’t he get to keep his love?

So he spent some nights with his mistress and some with you. Only the more time he spent with you the more he craved your presence. It was beginning to wear into his soul. 

And now he stood in the very same throne room he married you in, after spending a night in his mistresses sheets, talking about putting his brother on the throne and betraying the very thing your marriage stood for. The peace treaty. 

“Has it happened?” Alicent asks, a sob raking her body as she turns to the others.  Aemonds own throat tightened up before he felt it. Like a needle entering the small of his spine, hitting the nerves all the way up to his neck, you were close. 

“They killed the beast this morning…” The dragonkeeper murmurs, and Aemond feels like puking. Your dragon, your charming beast had been taken out so you would have no chance of escape, no chance to get back to your mother. 

“Aegon is being bathed right now. And Rhaenys is still deciding in her chambers, though I still think we need to-” Otto begins only for Alicent to scream. 

“WE’VE ALREADY KILLED ONE DRAGON TODAY, THERE WILL BE NO MORE DEATH!”

There is a gasp from the doors and everyone's heads whip around to them, before he can stop himself Aemond is rushing to get to them. But there is nothing there when he opens them. 

You drew up some good faith treaties

I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone

You said I have to trust more freely

But diesel is desire, you were playin' with fire

And maybe it's the past that's talkin'

Screamin' from the crypt

Tellin' me to punish you for things you never did

So I justified it

You think on your grandfather kissing your head the day of your wedding, the heavy veil weighing your head down as you tried not to cry when he whispered a thank you for your sacrifice. Then you thought of your first night with your husband, scared and lonely, wishing you had family when he offered to play chess. 

Oh how you had loved him throughout your marriage, and now….you were gutting anyone who got between you and him on the battlefield. You would make him regret ever crossing your family. 

They forgot Rhaenys, or maybe they didn’t forget her but they thought you would never find out until she had already sided with them. 

You were running through the halls so quickly that your slippers fell off and by the time you got to your great aunts rooms you had a thick layer of sweat covering your body as well as tears. You had sobbed to her as you broke the door down, falling into her when the wood gave out and allowing her to cradle you for a moment before she rushed you to stand again. 

You had no dragon and hers was locked up, so you had to concentrate on what to do next. 

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, the bombs were close and

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

Always remember

Uh-huh, the burning embers

I vowed not to fight anymore

If we survived the Great War

He finally sees you from a distance, swinging his sword at a giant coming for him smoothly as he scans you for injuries. A vision covered in blood, your eyes narrowing in on him the second he smiles at you. 

His heart begins to beat through his chest as you step towards him, one step first slowly followed by another before you full blown charge at him. His breath catches as he watches, hand tightening on the sword and his feet preparing for the blow, and for the smallest moment he thinks of letting you kill him. 

Letting you get your vengeance. 

If you had killed his dragon and betrayed his family isn’t that what he would want himself?

“We need to go Aemond.” Otto Hightower snaps, following his grandson through the halls of the keep, a fuming look on his face as he does so .

But Aemond refused to listen, no, he needed to find you before anyone else did. He had to be the one to tell you of what his family had done. The only problem being that no one had seen you. 

Not your maids or your ladies in waiting, not even the castle maids. 

When he tears through your shared apartments he doesn’t see you and the anxiety rising in his chest begins to take over. You knew. You had to have known.

That’s when he sees it, the small parcel you had hidden under a vase of flowers beside your side of the bed. Just the corner had been peeking out and when he tugs on it he finds a letter written to you by the Queen of Whispers. 

There is a cracking feeling in his chest that rises up his neck and into his ears, and all he can see is red.  “Y/N!”

It turned into something bigger

Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed

Your finger on my hair pin triggers

Soldier down on that icy ground

Looked up at me with honor and truth

Broken and blue, so I called off the troops

That was the night I nearly lost you

I really thought I lost you

By the time he is within arms reach you are swinging your sword as hard as you can, his own steel hitting yours with a crash before you both draw back and start again. It’s like a dance between you two, one that you haven’t done in years but feels so exhilarating all the same. 

One turn and you slice his arm, only to have him slice your thigh, so you duck and swing upwards. He dodges back and the tip of your sword hits the very tip of his nostril. 

A moment of pride fills you when he takes in a deep breath, pulling your sword in and getting into the proper stance. 

“Is that all you got?” He laughs and you find yourself smirking. 

“I was just getting started.”

“You know, I remember the first night I had you…. You had been so scared I was sure you’d sob the entire-” He knew what he was doing, that much was evident when he blocked your blow with a smirk and retaliated just as quickly. 

Your knees wobble when the force of it sends you back, but you grit your teeth and grab his wrist before he can pull away, trying to wrestle his sword free as he uses his body strength to throw you. 

“There are many people here…” You murmur, ducking behind your veil as your new husband leads you to the dance floor, your hand gripping his own so tightly you feel as though you might break the bones that lie underneath. “I might fall or-”

“Do you not trust that I would keep you upright, my dear ni-wife?”

“You haven’t given me a reason to trust-”

“Then today I shall.” He whispers in your ear before getting ready to start the dance. And you follow his lead, the nerves making you hesitate every step of the way, but soon enough you found your way with Aemond and it no longer mattered who was watching. 

He lifted you and spun you around, a smile on his face that many people gawked at. It was a well deserved smile. 

We can plant a memory garden

Say a solemn prayer, place a poppy in my hair

There's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair

And we will never go back

He has you pinned to the mud below and a snarl written on his face, his back screaming at the amount of pressure he has put on it today but the feeling of satisfaction at you being stuck was far too big to give up now. 

“We can forget this, you and I, just say the words and I’ll let this fit go.” He warns, applying a bit of pressure on your neck to cut off circulation. “By morning you can be on my side and I’ll have maids wash that blood out of your pretty hair. You can be my wife again.”

Something in him is begging you to take the deal, please please please. Please don’t leave me, please don’t make me do this….

He wondered for a moment if you would, seeing the tears well up in your eyes as you struggled to free yourself from his grip. If you would just listen, let him make this right without any of your blood being spilt, he would. 

He would swear himself to you over and over if you gave him another chance. 

The first night he knows he has feelings for you is the first night he turned down Alys, stopping her fingers from touching his pants as he mumbled out an excuse, forehead resting on her shoulder as he pictured your disappointed face. 

He never wished to see that face, and by the time he leaves Alys’ hut he would be sure he never would. 

“It’s been weeks of this Aemond,” She snaps, pulling into herself as he reaches for his leather tunic. “You said you married her to make your father happy, a death wish.”

“I did.”

“Then what is this-”

“I DON’T KNOW!” He screams, whirling on her. In truth he didn’t know what was happening, all he knew was you were left there, in the halls of the red keep as he was out there betraying you. 

You had made a vow and kept to it, why couldn’t he?

“I thought you hated basta-” Alys begins her sentence with tears in her eyes before he is upon her, blue eye sparkling in the candlelight. 

“Maybe you cursed me then.” It’s a spit in the face, the nail in the coffin as she reaches to slap him. The sound echoes across the room as his head snaps to the side, his cheek stinging from the pain and it takes everything in him not to retaliate. 

He had to get to you, none of this mattered anymore. 

To that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, the worst was over

My hand was the one you reached for

All throughout the Great War

Always remember

Uh-huh, we're burned for better

I vowed I would always be yours

'Cause we survived the Great War

If you agreed he would fly you away to a remote island, just the two of you. He would find you another dragon egg and grow you a garden. Nothing would ever harm you again. 

He sent a quick prayer up to the gods for this before a sharp feeling is sliding between his ribcage, the cold of your dagger meeting his skin like a cool kiss on a heat ragged day. 

He doesn’t really comprehend it, just grunts out in pain and loosens his hold on you to lean back, his hands flying up to see what damage had been done. 

“nO.” He gasps out, eyes flying to where you are in the mud. 

If he was scared in this moment he had no clue what you were, eyes wild as you sob, your chest rising and falling with every short breath you take. 

“KILL HER!” Someone calls, and for a second all Aemond can think to do is crawl to you. Ignoring the pain in his side as he removes his bloody hands from it, he makes his way to you, bringing one hand up to your cheek as an arrow marks through you. 

Your body shudders as it pierces from your back to your stomach, sliding right into Aemonds own stomach where he has wrapped his body around yours. If death was to greet him today then he would be sure not to be separated from you. 

Soldiers charged in at once and you let out a couple more sobs, and he found himself whispering in your ear “Just a second of pain, and we’ll be free.”

Uh-huh

Uh-huh

I would always be yours

'Cause we survived the Great War

Uh-huh

I vowed I would always be yours

Alicent buries you both together, a black veil over her head, her hands bound by rope with Cregan Stark keeping her close. 

This would be her final day outside, for the rest of her days would be in a tower, no freedom and no allies. 

She yearns for her children, and she yearns for her dear old friend, looking at the grass growing from the burnt earth surrounding your grave. 

Yes, she thinks while allowing the tears to fall, you both would be together after the war.

[wishfulwithwine]

The Great War

Rhysand x Reader

ACOTAR x Taylor Swift One Shot Series 

My knuckles were bruised like violets

Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked

Spineless in my tomb of silence

The cabin in the middle of the woods was quiet, but not silent. There was water running nearby, birds chirping, and animals running through the forest. You kept the fire lit, hearing the embers crackle and feeling the continuous warmth. 

What used to be the deepest fear of yours, was now a comfort. The fire no longer reminded you of the torture you and your brother received at the hands of your other step-brothers. 

Now, you couldn’t feel the cold, dark and damp hallways, or the chill of Amarantha’s stares out here. Under the mountain was pure silence - no breeze, no animals - just a deafening, terrorizing silence. 

The makeshift punching targets on the trees had become your outlet for your pent up emotions, your knuckles inevitably bloody but at least you could let your hurt out. Your body needed to expel the bottled emotions it kept from the facade under the mountain. The wounds didn’t hurt as much as the emotional struggle you endured. 

 You survived. You survived. 

Tore your banners down, took the battle underground

And maybe it was ego swinging

Maybe it was her

Flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur

“You shouldn’t have come with me. You should be back, back home, with everyone else” Rhysand stated, angrily, pacing once you arrived at his new room. You looked at Rhys, not just your High Lord but your brother’s best friend. You had followed him quickly back to his room after the welcoming ball, a bit more difficult in your large gown, but you weren’t a spy for nothing. 

“I’m not overjoyed to be here, especially with the likes of you, but we are here, Rhysand. I promised my brother to protect you” You said, walking closer to him. His eyes looked over at yours, fury swirling in them.

“Your brother… he’ll kill me. Why did you argue with me to go?” He asked, shaking his head.

“Because it didn’t feel right. You had to go, and if something went wrong, I’d never forgive myself if something happened to him.… Azriel won’t kill you, and you need all the help you can get here if we want to survive” You said, and although Rhys understood on some level your logic, he was furious at you. Well you were furious at him too, but that wasn’t necessarily new.

Despite being Azriel’s sister, you disliked Rhysand. You couldn’t say you hated him - which honestly, you probably did - because he had saved your brother from himself. Saved him from the daily torment of his mind, pulled him and yourself from the war camps, and gave him a fulfilling purpose. Azriel trusted him, formed a brotherhood bond with him and Cassian, yet you disliked for doing what you thought you should have been able to help with. 

“Why did you include yourself on the bargain with Amarantha? Huh? How was that protecting?” He asked, almost spitting at you, his temper rising. You kept your ground, firmly planting your feet as Rhys’s anger grew, his eyes swirling with fury.

“She wanted more than just you. She had been eyeing me all night as well, or did you not hear her words about the jewel of Illyria becoming her whore. She plays both teams, Rhysand. I don’t trust her, and Azriel would have done the same. We save home at all costs” You said, and he stared at you, and you felt the stroke on your mind’s walls. 

You shook your head, unwilling to let him in. Your mind was a place you never wanted him, nor anyone in. Luckily Rhysand was a good man deep in his core, despite your dislike of him for other reasons, and would never do anything without your consent. 

Rhys was the man who saved you and your brother from hell, and you could never repay him. You could never repay him for giving your brother all the courage and heart in the world, what you had tried to do but could never accomplish like he had. He was your brother’s knight in shining armor, and for that you would be forever grateful, and forever jealous. How could he save him from despair when you couldn’t?

“Thank you..” He uttered softly, looking at you with an emotion you couldn’t quite place.

“I’m not doing this for you” You said, looking away, trying to force down the emotions rising from memories of your family flooding your brain. You didn’t know when you’d see your brother again, your mother, the inner circle who had become your best friends...

“I know” He said, and you nodded, unable to look at him.

“When do you think we’ll be out of here?” You asked, trying to change topics. You heard his harsh exhale.

“I don’t know, but they’re safe. I was able to bubble them” Rhysand said, a bit sadly. 

“They’re safe” You reiterated, nodding. 

All that bloodshed, crimson clover,

The bombs were close and

My hand was the one you reached for 

All throughout the Great War

Always remember 

The burning embers

I vowed not to fight anymore

If we survived the Great War

Fifty years. Fifty years of torment, torture and hell was finally ending.

“Y/N” Your name pierced through your thoughts, as you turned your head away from the corpse of Amarantha to your High Lord. It felt like your body was stuck in place, the shock of the night overwhelming your body. 

Rhys approached you delicately, reaching out a hand for you to take. No words were spoken, as you stared into his eyes, and took his hand, clutching it tightly. He looked at you cautiously, before raising his other hand to your cheek, resting his forehead on yours as the two of you synced your thudding hearts to a normal rhythm. 

“Ready?” He asked, in a whisper, after a few moments. You nodded, as he wrapped his arms around you, holding you as tightly as he felt appropriate while winnowing.

“You’re back!” Mor screamed, as you and Rhysand had winnowed back. Your whole body tensed, unable to pull away from Rhysand’s arms despite the inner circle’s stares at the two of you, your grip on his tightening. He felt you shake your head on his chest, minimally, and Rhysand opened his wings, shielding you both from the stares of the group. 

You leaned a bit from his grip, looking directly at him as you opened your mind up to him, your heightened emotions and stress of seeing everyone again after so long. After everything.

I’ll let them know when you are ready, Rhys said in your mind, as leaned into you, kissing your forehead gently. Leaning back, you shared a look before you stepped out of his arms, and winnowed away.

The inner circle stared as you left, and Rhysand put away his wings, looking away finally from where you were standing, to address his family’s. A weak smile appeared on his lips, as he finally saw the faces of the people he - they - had fought so long to protect. 

“What-Where’d-“ Azriel stared, looking at the spot his sister once stood.

“A lot has happened. Y/N needs some time alone. If I have to, I will order you not to search for her” Rhys stated, looking directly at Azriel, before glancing at all of them to show the severity of his words.

“She’s my sister” Azriel growled, protectively. Rhys stared at him, posturing himself tall to full strength of High Lord as intimidation. The Inner circle was shocked by his display of protection for someone who - before going under the mountain - had all but hated Rhysand. Y/N would barely speak to him unless ordered and was forced by Azriel to spend time with him. 

Now, Rhysand was defending Y/N against her own brother. 

“And she will see you when she is ready” Rhys stated, the violet in his eyes spinning in fury.

“Alright, we’ll give her time. We’re just so happy you’re home” Cassian said, diffusing the situation, as the pair nodded, and the rest of the group sighed, hugging their best friend and High Lord. 

Broken and blue, so I called off the troops

That was the night I nearly lost you

I really thought I lost you.

We can plant a memory garden

Say a solemn prayer, place a poppy in my hair.

There’s no morning glory, it was war, it wasn’t fair.

And we will never go back

You had heard the wind shift, his steps coming closer to you after he closed the door. You smelled his distinct cologne - the scent you had previously hated, but now smelled like comfort. You didn’t look at him, as he made his way to sit next to you on the coach in front of the fireplace and took the additional wine glass you had left out for him. 

Time was another concept out here - only marked by the rising and setting of the sun around you, the cooler air breezing through the trees. The days were spent working out - climbing th mountains, training, or destroying the punching bag trees.

Every night since the first night, Rhysand had come out here after he felt your terror. Your mind was replaying on repeat all the torture and nightmares under the mountain you had faced. When he arrived, Rhysand didn’t hesitate to wrap you in his arms, wake you from your nightmares, and hold you tight against his chest.

Rhys himself hadn’t been able to sleep that night. The terrors keeping his mind active.

Both of you had sobbed, no words needed to be spoken of the horrors the two of you had lived.

The next night, you added the wine, hoping to calm yourself and forget, but it ended the same way without Rhysand. The memories too overwhelming to go to sleep safely alone. Now, days later, the two of you would drink wine before heading to bed together, knowing you were secure with the others’ arms wrapped around you.

You moved the blanket to allow him to move closer to you, snuggling in to his side as he wrapped his arms around you. You took a deep breath, inhaling more of his cologne, as he moved to make you both comfortable but surrounding you with his warmth. Your head nuzzled into the space by his neck, his arms wrapped around your waist with your legs over his.

“Azriel asked about you again today. He’s getting more demanding on seeing you” Rhys admitted. You let out a sigh.

“I told them you’ll be back on your own time and you’re safe” He added.

“Tomorrow. I’ll come tomorrow” You said, and you felt Rhys breathe deeply, before moving his body to look at you in your eyes.

“Are you sure?” He asked, softly, and you let the corners of your lips lift a bit into a smile, the first form of a smile you’ve displayed in fifty years. 

“As long as we can still continue our sleeping arrangements, I can handle our family” You quipped, and you could see his face morph with happiness. 

He leaned in, pressing his lips against yours, shooting tingles down your spine and fireworks along the softness of his lips.

“Anything you wish, mate”

I would always be yours

Since we survived the Great War

I vowed I would always be yours

[xmalfoyweasleyx]

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

Based on The Great War - Taylor Swift and my tiktok story (you can watch it for some visualisation, it has multiple parts)—> my taylor swift songs masterlist

Summary: What happens when they find out that every person, killed by a monster, is stuck in the upside down? You were killed by the mindflayer weeks ago, but your grieving boyfriend Steve finds out you’ve been trying to survive in the upside down all this time. They try to find you but Steve is filled with guilt and realizes some heartbreaking facts about it all.

Warning: angst, blood, grieving, death -> happy ending! 2k words

I used pictures of Steve because there’s so much pictures of him I imagined when I wrote this <3 Enjoy xx

My knuckles were bruised like violets Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked Spineless in my tomb of silence

Steve Harrington stared blankly at the photograph sitting on his nightstand, his girlfriend, Y/N, smiling back at him. The pain in his chest was still unbearable, and the weight of grief hung heavy upon his shoulders. It had been almost 1 month since Y/N's tragicdeath, killed by the mind flayer

The once confident and popular high school hero had become a mere shadow of his former self. He had lost his infectious smile, his carefree attitude, and the spark that made him Steve Harrington. And before he could even grieve properly, there was already some new kind of misery happening in Hawkins. But it wasn’t like before, Steve just couldn’t get involved in it all. He really wanted to help his friends with this Vecna stuff, but he couldn’t do it.

Countless nights of nightmares, waking up screaming, were now slowly fading away. He was getting better. At first, he couldn’t believe she wasn’t there anymore. He couldn't believe he would never kiss her anymore, never hold her, smell her. He wanted to return when it happened, he wanted to make her live again. But after some days he started to realize he shouldn’t have that kind of hope. He finally accepted it. The love of his life was gone, and he didn't save her.

A knock on the door interrupted Steve's thoughts. He sighed, stood up and opened the door to find his best friend, Dustin Henderson, standing there with a mix of excitement and trepidation on his face. Max, Robin, Nancy and Eddie were standing next to him with the same excitement. “What are you all doing here so smiley?" Steve asked, his voice tinged with a mixture of surprise and curiosity. He tried to seem okay, he always did even though he didn't see them that much anymore. "Dude, you won't believe what we found," Dustin exclaimed, his eyes gleaming with anticipation. "I think… I think Y/N might still be alive." Steve's heart skipped a beat, hope surging through his veins like an electric shock. His mind whirled with disbelief and longing. "What are you talking about? How is that even possible? I swear to god if this is some stupid prank, you are way out of the line” Steve rambled with a weird feeling in his stomach. “It’s a long story, we went to a crazy prisoner and stuff, but okay that doesn’t matter, we found out that every person, killed by a monster from the upside down, might still be alive and isn’t really killed, but just stuck in there, haunted by these creatures." Steve didn’t respond, he couldn’t find the energy. He could only sit down on the edge of his bed, staring blankly in front of him. This couldn’t be true, it must be a dream. Or maybe they were wrong?

Uh-huh, tears on the letter I vowed not to cry anymore If we survived the Great War

It went silent. All the others were so excited but Steve didn’t have one emotion on his face. Even though on the inside, he was exploding with thousands of feelings. Nancy sat next to him with a look of sympathy on her face. “I know this must be very hard for you, not to forget incredibly confusing. But you have to believe us, if we find her she might still be there, your Y/N,” she said, delicately laying a hand on his shoulder. “We have no time to lose, she might have survived, but she’s still in there with all those monsters” Eddie added nervously. That’s when they all started rambling to each other, pulling out maps and flashlights. That’s when Steve finally realized, they were making up a plan. They had to go into the upside down. She was alive. It was all true. It wasn’t a joke. As much as he wanted to help, he was still frozen on his bed. And as if he wasn’t feeling bad enough, another big wave of guilt washed over him. He could have saved her all this time. “Are you okay?” Nancy asked. “I gave up on her” Steve said with a flat tone. “No no Steve, you can’t blame yourself, no” she shook her head. “All this time, when I was here crying, full of self-pity. She was there, hurt, haunted, trying to survive. And I didn’t help, I didn’t look for her, I didn't go back” he said, tears in his eyes. “Steve… we saw it happen, she had a funeral, you thought she was dead, we all did,” Nancy whispered gently.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

Uh-huh, the bombs were close and

My hand was the one you reached for

The air of the upside down was thick with an oppressive silence as Steve cautiously navigated the eerie, distorted version of Hawkins. Robin, Nancy and Eddie are close behind him. The once-familiar woods and streets were now tangled with overgrown vegetation and crumbling buildings.Steve's heart pounded in his chest as he sensed a presence in the darkness. He could hear the faint fluttering of wings, growing louder with each passing moment. His grip tightened on the bat as a swarm of weird bats descended upon him.

They suddenly attacked them from all sides, their piercing screeches filling the air. Steve swung his bat fiercely, striking at the relentless creatures, but their numbers seemed endless. Behind him he heard screams and groans from his friends. Steve fought valiantly, but the bats' relentless assault left him disoriented and on the defensive. His heart raced as they attacked his now muddy and bloody body, leaving scratches that stung with each strike. He stumbled backward unable to find an escape route.We’ve lost, he thought. We’re never going to find y/n and we’ll die here too.

And that’s when the creatures suddenly stopped and looked around, they seemed distracted by something.“Come on, catch it” they heard a voice in the distance scream. The distant shadow threw something far into the woods, the material was immediately followed by the bats. They flew away like nothing happened.The shadow ran closer to them and that’s when Steve saw her.

Her pretty face was scratched up, her hair all messy but still with the same beautiful shade of y/h/c. She looked at them like she'd seen a ghost.“Y/N,” he sighed. “Steve? How did you find me” she answered with tears in her eyes. She rushed to his side and embraced him tightly."I thought I lost you forever," Steve whispered, his voice choked with emotion.Y/N held him even tighter, her voice filled with both sadness and hope. "It was horrible Steve, luckily I found some ways to distract all those creatures.. but.. but..” She stuttered, finding no words to explain. For weeks now, y/n believed they would never find her, that they would forget about her and move on.

The couple stood there, both at lost for words, hands grabbing each other like they could get separated again. Steve was mesmerized. All this time grieving her and thinking about her, he already forgot how pretty she really was. How soft her hands felt on his skin and how her smile felt so warm and familiar.“Steve you’re hurt” y/n’s worried voice interrupted his thoughts. That’s when his attention went to the stinging feeling in his stomach. Steve felt dizzy when he saw all the blood dripping from it.“There in the woods, let’s patch him up there” Nancy points.

Steve leans into the rocks, closing his eyes and groaning. He eyes closed automatically and he tried his best not to faint.“Heyheyhey, keep your eyes open sweet boy, look at me” he heard y/n’s voice. When he opened his eyes he tried to focus on the beautiful y/e/c he'd been wanting to look at for weeks now. “You’re beautiful” he whispered with all his last energy.“Here use this” she heard Nancy say behind her. She handed her a piece of fabric. “Thanks” y/n nodded.“Okay Stevie, this is gonna hurt a little” she prepared him. But Steve’s pain eased already a little when he heard her say Stevie to him. She stroked his cheek, hesitant, but lovingly, not sure at what point in their relationship they’re standing now.Butterflies fluttered in Steve’s stomach, but the feeling went away quickly when he felt the material against his wounds.Steve groaned, he focused on y/n’s face, finding comfort in it. She was standing close to him and it was incredible how, even in this situation, her touch and presence could make him want her so bad. He wanted to kiss her, he wanted to touch her, he wanted to show her how much he loved her. A sexual tension, the electricity hangs in the air. “There you go” she whispered, staring longingly into his eyes.“Y/n.. I-“ Steve tried but got cut off by Eddie, “Okay you both can talk and fuck this ,whatever it is, long build up tension off later, but now we gotta get out of this freaking place”.“You’re right, please take me back home” y/n sighed with a mixture of fear and excitement.

Broken and blue, so I called off the troops

That was the night I nearly lost you

I really thought I lost you

On their walk to find a way out, the mood in the woods felt cold and dark. Steve and y/n were walking next to each other in silence. The boy didn’t know what thing to say first, he tried to come up with the perfect thing to say but he couldn’t.

“I heard you, you know?” y/n finally said. Steve didn’t get it at first, but then he realized. Everybody who knows about the upside down, knows you can hear the voices of the people on the other side if they’re in the same room. Will did. And he also… oh shit... He also communicated with the lights. Did y/n.. did y/n do that too?

Another big wave of guilt washed over Steve.

“I heard you in your room, at night when you had nightmares. I heard you fighting with Robin about what happened. I heard you getting better.” She confessed. She probably heard everything, Steve thought. “Please don’t tell me that you tried to contact me through the lights and that I didn’t notice,” Steve answered. Y/n stayed silent, which said enough.

“Oh god” the boy sighed with a sad tone, disappointed in himself.

“I gave up after a while. I listened to you for a long time, it gave me comfort. But you never noticed the lights flickering. I can’t blame you Steve, I heard how much pain you were in. But then I stopped listening. You got back on track with your life and I thought… I thought I was going to die here eventually” y/n confessed. They stopped walking and Steve looked at her with the most guilty and sad eyes she’d ever seen. He was wondering how he could ever forgive himself for this.

“Did you… ever… like.. find someone? When I was gone?” She asked hesitantly. “What do you mean?” Steve didn’t understand her. “Like, did you fall in love again? If you did I would understand, I mean I was pretty dead and you were alone and-“ she mumbled stressed. His heart breaks at the way she nervously toys with her fingers. “Heyhey stop stop, of course not. I could never. I- I still love you too much, okay? Don’t worry, I… I l still love you” he comforted her, not getting how on earth she would think he could fall in love with someone else so fast.

“I lov-“ y/n tried but she got cut off by a sudden dizziness. “Are you okay? Y/n?!” Steve exclaimed. “It.. it happens sometimes these last days.. it’s-“ and then she fainted. Steve tried to catch her but he was too late.

Eddie, Robin and Nancy turned around quickly when they heard the sound.

“What happened?!” Robin screamed, worried.

“She just fainted, said it happens sometimes” Steve answered while pulling her body on the ground closer to him.

“It must be from being in here for so long, this air is kind of toxic” Nancy concluded.

“We need to get out of this place” Steve nervously said.

I vowed I would always be yours

'Cause we survived the Great War

Y/n woke up, surprised by the comfort of soft pillow under her. Her body ached less and her eyes hurt from seeing light in after a very long time. And it didn’t smell horrible anymore, it smelled great. She inhaled the sent that smelled like home. The moment your body relaxed you realized it was Steve’s smell, his house. That’s when you saw room. You were finally back. “That wallpaper is still terrible” you sighed jokingly. Steve laughed. Y/n’s eyes started to water a little, “I’m back home,” she cried happily. “You’re back home” Steve nodded stroking her hair.

That’s when Steve promised he would never give up on her again. She would be his wife, the mother of his children, his for ever companion and so much more. If survived this, they could survive anything.

[joytri]

My knuckles were bruised like violets, sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked. Spineless in my tomb of silence, tore your banners down, and took the battle underground.

Taylor Swift, The Great War

[jalwyn21]

"my knuckles were bruised like violets/sucker punching walls cursing you as I sleep talked"

Even if it's metaphorical, these lyrics are legitimately frightening. Along with the lyrics to Afterglow where she talks about "putting you in jail for something you didn't do."

And this was when they were still together. To think that he put up with this for 6 years only for her to spin it all into being his fault and sending her rabid stans after him. Even if he's as unbothered as he seems (and I really hope that he is) it has to really hurt to think you put so much into a relationship with someone who treated you that way only for them to attack you not only themselves but also turning her followers after you to send you literal death threats and spread false rumors about you. And he was only 25 and not even really as exposed to media and public life as he is now.

After seeing her current bf's disgusting behavior last night, I truly believe those two deserve each other completely and Joe has had a very lucky escape from her

Put you in jail for something you didn't do I pinned your hands behind your back, oh Thought I had reason to attack, but no

Why'd I have to break what I love so much? It's on your face, don't walk away, I need to say

Tell me that it's not my fault Tell me that I'm all you want Even when I break your heart 🙄

Daring you to leave me just so I can try and scare you

You drew up some good faith treaties I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone You said I have to trust more freely But diesel is desire, you were playin' with fire And maybe it's the past that's talkin' Screamin' from the crypt Tellin' me to punish you for things you never did So I justified it

Soldier down on that icy ground Looked up at me with honor and truth Broken and blue, so I called off the troops That was the night I nearly lost you

If your cascade ocean wave blues come 🙄

And if I would've known How many pieces you had crumbled into 🙄 I might've let them lay

Is it insensitive for me to say Get your shit together? 🙄

Like swi*fties will look at these lyrics and go : Awww, so romantic... and not understand how could Joe not marry her.. Yikes! And somehow he is the bad guy now.... 🙄

[yourhighness6]

Zutara's Song is Definetely The Great War by Taylor Swift

I've seen a lot of Zutara songs and playlists out there and I wanted to share my opinion on my personal favorite

I want to start out by saying that this analysis is going to completely ignore Taylor Swift's intentions when she wrote the song and any analysis of the song in concurrence with her life. I'm also going off my personal feelings that the first verse and chorus are Zuko talking to Katara, the second verse, chorus, and bridge are Katara talking to Zuko, and the remaining parts of the song are them reflecting after the war.

My knuckles were bruised like violets,

Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep talked,

For me, this was pretty typical season 1 Zuko. Angry at the world, fighting everything in sight, ect, ect. It's only after the first two lines that the song gets a little bit more specific.

Spineless in my tomb of silence,

Tore your banners down, took the battle underground,

That third line is really reminiscent of Ba Sing Se. He took himself out of the story, until, of course, he had to make a choice in "Crossroads of Destiny"

And we know what he chooses

It's almost phrased in the form of an apology, which connects it even further to their story. "Tore your banners down" could also mean the fall of Ba Sing Se in general. Aang is Katara's banner, the avatar who she put so much hope in, but the Earth Kingdom banner is also who she was fighting behind. Azula killed Aang, so I would personally say it's the latter, but I saw two meanings behind it so it's totally up for interpretation.

And maybe it was egos swinging,

The "egos swinging" bit resonated with me a lot, because at this point in the story Zuko isn't done with his character arc. He still seeks his father's validation over his own moral code, and although it seems to me like he's gotten over a lot of his entitlement, I think he still feels entitled to his throne. That's one of my favorite things about his arc, actually, that he comes from a place of privilege but eventually, unlike Azula, realizes that the right to rule isn't given by birth but by true care for the people you represent. (some politicians should take notes)

Maybe it was her,

To me, the "her" in this case is Azula, convincing Zuko their father will be proud of him if he returns to the Fire Nation, although it could also mean Mai. Again, open for interpretation.

Flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur,

This could mean a lot for different people. I've seen a theory about Zuko possibly disassociating (not unlike similar theories about Darth Vader), which I think is interesting. It could also maybe represent the guilt he still feels, which is my personal opinion.

Moving on, the chorus is fairly generic once again,

All that bloodshed, crimson clover,

Uh-uh, sweet dream was over,

My hand was the one you reached for,

All throughout the great war,

The hand part stuck out to me because of the part in the final agni Kai when they reach for each other:

(screencaps are bad quality but ya'll get the idea)

Then it goes back to the any enemies-to-lovers generic dynamic again...

Always remember, uh-uh,

Tears on the letter,

I vowed not to cry anymore,

If we survived the Great War.

And then we switch to Katara's POV:

You drew up some good faith treaties,

I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone,

You could argue that this is several moments throughout the series, maybe at the end of the war when she gets together with Aang, but I connected it most with her time spent on the ship after book 2. While Zuko was trying to fix his relationship with the Fire Nation and return to his family, Katara was isolating herself, worried about the war, about the avatar, avoiding her father and Sokka out of shame and feelings of abandonment. It was an extremely dark time for her, and although Zuko was trying to feel hopeful about his return, he doesn't even smile when he reunites with Mai. He knows he made the wrong decision.

You said I have to trust more freely,

This is after Zuko's redemption arc, during "The Southern Raiders" (which is probably my favorite ATLA episode, btw). Zuko encourages Katara to trust him, feeling that he is changed and is now deserving of it.

But she refuses to forgive or trust him

I would argue this is for good reason. She is clearly angry at more than just him, the entire Fire Nation, in fact, for murdering her mother and starting the war, but it is also very personal. When he betrayed her in Ba Sing Se after she revealed such a devastating detail of her life and they shared a connection, her abandonment issues probably came into play. It's similar to the trauma she had with her father after he left to join the war. She is scared that the people she cares about will leave her, just like her parents did, whether they had a choice or not, and just like Aang did when Azula shot him with lightning, again, without meaning to. Zuko left her intentionally to join the Fire Nation, even after she offered to heal his scar, a very important moment in their arcs. She is forgiving, optimistic, helpful, and kind to someone who hunted her and her friends for nearly a year, and he throws the offer of her most valuable asset back in her face and is instrumental in Aang's near death experience.

But diesel is desire, you were playing with fire,

He helps her. He uncovers her trauma, aids her in working through it, is supportive even when it was probably more than he bargained for.

And maybe it's the past that's talking,

Screaming from the crypt,

Telling me to punish you for things you never did,

Her mother did die at the hands of the Fire Nation, under Zuko's family's orders, whether they came directly from Ozai or not. But he wasn't the one who killed her or ordered her death, and he IS the one who is trying to defeat his father and end the war in favor of balance and peace. She realizes that...

So I just defied it,

...And finds it in her heart to forgive him.

After that, we start on the chorus again.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover,

Uh-uh, the bombs were closer,

I think that last line also refers to a different scene, much earlier in "the Southern Raiders", when Azula attacks the temple...

My hand was the one you reached for,

All throughout the Great War

...And Zuko saves Katara.

(I might do a separate post analyzing just this moment because holy crap there is A LOT there)

Always remember, uh-uh,

The burning embers,

I vowed not to fight anymore,

If we survived the Great War,

I think this refers to the agni Kai specifically, as does most of the bridge. The fire everywhere, the fear, the fact that it's the last battle of the war. It just fits.

It turned into something bigger,

Somewhere in the haze got the sense I'd been betrayed,

Your finger on my hairpin trigger,

Everything is depending on this battle. If they can't defeat Azula, what will happen to the Fire Nation? Will the people now just be under a new, arguably stronger and more powerful tyrant?

Soldier down, on that icy ground,

Looked up at me with honor and truth,

Broken and blue, so I called off the troops,

But they never learn what would have happened, because their combined efforts defeat Azula.

That was the night I nearly lost you,

I really thought I'd lost you

But not before Zuko (or rather, Azula) gives Katara the fright of her life.

(the love and concern on her face is so heartbreakingly beautiful it makes me want to sob)

And now everything is fine! The bridge is over and the next verse is full of hope.

We can plant a memory garden,

Say a solemn prayer, place a poppy in my hair,

For the poppy part, I'd like to address a particular fan theory. In the final scene, Katara has a pink flower in her hair.

(I left the usernames on, but please lmk if anyone wants a different type of credit. screenshot taken from this post: x)

According to another source I found, this flower is a pink peony, which symbolizes prosperity and a happy marriage.

(flower analysis originally from this post: x)

I know that this is a peony, not a poppy, but close enough? Also, if it were a poppy, it would symbolize compassion and platonic love.

Either way, I think of this as a kind of goodbye from Zuko to Katara. No matter what the situation was at the end of the series, whether Zuko was in love with Katara, Katara was in love with Zuko, or they were in love with each other, "platonic love" and "happy marriage" were a goodbye. It's either wishing her the best with Aang, or saying they can only be friends because of Aang or because of duty, but that he loves her anyway. (oh look, I made myself cry) At least, I think that in canon context. But within the song, it's a peony and they're now engaged lol

Anyway, the verse continues.

There's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair,

And we will never go back to that,

And then the chorus starts again, but it's tone is far more hopeful than before. The worst is behind them. The war is over.

Bloodshed, crimson clover,

Uh-uh, the worst was over,

My hand was the one you reached for,

All throughout the Great War,

Always remember, uh-uh,

We're burned for better,

I vowed I would always be yours,

'Cause we survived the Great War.

It's just so perfect! I love it! (psst, if anyone wants me to also analyze another "Zutara song" feel free to ask)

[blubffsd]

The Great War - WC | Bonus

summary: let's unpack the meaning behind The Great War of these two worlds colliding.

note: you should play The Great War by Taylor Swift.

read Worlds Collide before reading this, you can find it on my masterlist :)

My knuckles were bruised like violets

Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked

This part is a representation of Mia's emotions towards Kylian throughout the World Cup final match, all the frustration she felt being mad at him because she didn't want to be.

Spineless in my tomb of silence

"Tomb of silence" refers to everything that happened with Mia's father in the round of 16 of the World Cup, something that she never told anyone and that Kylian only knows a little about.

Tore your banners down, took the battle underground

"The Battle" represents Mia's internal duel with her father, his absence, and how he always chose his sport over her. During the final of the world Mia "tooks her own battle underground" trying to avoid the real situation with her dad thinking about the dream of his whole life was about to come true.

And maybe it was ego swinging

Perhaps the real reason the worlds collide is because of both Mia's and Kylian's egos of wanting to win the biggest prize.

Maybe it was her

Or maybe the real reason was Melissa's manipulation of Mia and her desire to talk to Kylian.

Flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur

No matter how hard Mia tried, she couldn't help but remember her battle: the situation with her father, even after winning the World Cup. She always kept him in mind, even though she tried not to.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

All the "spilled blood" represents all the pain of Mia and Kylian and the evil of those who tried to manipulate them into not being together. "The crimson clover" where the blood is spilled represents their relationship.

Sweet dream was over

For a moment, Mia and Kylian's illusion of continuing together had ended.

My hand was the one you reached for all throughout the Great War

"The Great War" represents the World Cup final. Despite all the differences and the thousands of reasons his environment gave him for not doing it, Kylian always looked for Mia, even during the great war.

Always remember, tears on the letter

Mia's suffering was always caused by her father and his absence, the World Cup final was the trigger for everything she had been hiding. And even more so when his boyfriend was involved. The tears in the letter to Kylian are not for him, they are for her dad.

I vowed not to cry anymore if we survived the Great War

Mia will stop crying and suffering because of her father if she survives with Kylian because it would be a way of leaving everything behind.

You drew up some good faith treaties

Kylian looked for Mia at all times, even during the ceremony when they gave him the golden boot because he needed to talk to her.

I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone

But Mia decided to run away from him and torture herself with her thoughts and the guilt that wouldn't leave her alone.

You said I have to trust more freely

Kylian never felt betrayed seeing her support her country.

But diesel is desire, you were playin' with fire

But Mia can't help but feel guilty.

And maybe it's the past that's talking, screaming from the crypt, telling me to punish you for things you never did, so I justified it

The past with her father and what happened in the 2018 World Cup torments her too much, making her believe that Kylian will do the same to her as her father did, which is why she justified leaving.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover

The bombs were close and my hand was the one you reached for all throughout The Great War

Kylian at no time during the game did he stop thinking about Mia or how much he needed her there, not even after the defeat.

Always remember, the burning embers

I vowed not to fight anymore if we survived the Great War

If they survive, Mia will stop fighting in the battle with her father.

It turned into something bigger, somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed

This verse represents three situations:

1) Mia towards her father on the call after supporting Kylian in the match against Argentina in the 2018 World Cup.

2) Kylian towards Mia when he saw that she wasn't there.

3) Kylian towards his entire family when he saw the treatment they had with Mia.

Your finger on my hair pin triggers

If it hadn't been for Kylian, Mia would never have fully accepted the situation with her dad.

Soldier down on that icy ground looked up at me with honor and truth, broken and blue

The "soldier down" represents 8-year-old Mia who lived in the illusion that her dad would change one day and that she always tried to mean something to her dad, but with the conversation with her father when she returned to Argentina it ended up wiping out all the hopes she had.

So I called of the troops

That was how Mia decided to stop fighting her battle with her father and leave things as they were.

That was the night I nearly lost you, I really thought I lost you

Both Mia and Kylian believed that this was the end of their relationship.

We can plant a memory garden

"Memory garden" represents all the events that made everything get out of control and that ended up causing the great war. Mia's partying, the fight with Ethan and more.

Say a solemn prayer

This part represents Kylian and Mia's decision to put an end to the whole problem.

"—I promise I won't go anywhere or leave you ever again.

—I promise too."

Place a poppy in my hair

The red poppies are a symbol of recognition to all those who have fought in a war conflict. In the story, it would be a metaphor to indicate that Mia and Kylian survived and are now going to fight together.

There's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair

Regardless of the outcome or who won, it was still an unfair war for both of them.

And we will never go back to that bloodshed, crimson clover

Despite everything, Mia and Kylian understood that what happened was not their fault.

The worst was over

They were able to survive the worst part.

My hand was the one you reached for all throughout the Great War

Always remember, we're burned for better

The war taught them that their love is stronger than before and that they will always be able to face anything together.

I vowed I would always be yours 'cause we survived the Great War

They will always belong to each other. Mia belongs to Kylian and Kylian belongs to Mia. Because they survived. Because their worlds collided and they still kept looking for each other. Even when their families didn't approve of them together, even during all throughout great war, it wasn't their fault. It was never their fault.

I would always be yours 'cause we survived the Great War

I vowed I would always be yours...

note: this is the real "there's actually a taylor swift song that explains it"

[its-an-obsession]

The Great War

Teen Wolf Masterlist | Full Masterlist 

Summary: You and Isaac have been together for two years. You had your fair share of ups and downs, but lately, it seemed that these little 'ups and downs' repeated themselves no matter the apologies. You tried to convince yourself that nothing was happening, but part of you knew that that wasn't the case. With the help of your older brother, it took just one discussion to understand what was going on between you and Isaac Lahey.

A/N: I don't know if I like this one very much. I had a bit of a hard time trying to write this one, so I'm hoping it's not confusing. Enjoy!!

Notes:

Y/N/N: Your Nick Name

Derek Hale -> Your Older Brother

Warnings:

Angst

Language

Isaac Lahey x-reader

"You can't just admit that you were wrong, huh?" Isaac said, his arms crossed. After seeing a movie with Scott and Kira, an argument had spurred involving something pretty stupid. My boyfriend's motorcycle was almost out of gas. I recommended going to a gas station near the theater so we could just head to my house after.

My knuckles were bruised like violets Sucker-punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked Spineless in my tomb of silence Tore your banners down, took the battle underground And maybe it was ego swinging Maybe it was her Flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur

Isaac insisted on going to the gas station a little bit a ways. That caused us to be stranded on the side of the road. "None of this is my fault. If we had just stopped at the gas station like I said, we wouldn't be stuck on this street," I said. He rolled his eyes when I gestured to the road.

A few cars passed, not bothering to ask if we needed help. I grabbed my phone to call Derek. Neither of us felt like involving a tow truck. "What're you doing?" Isaac asked. "Calling Derek," I clicked on my brother's contact. It rang for a few seconds before my brother picked up on the other end.

"You two were supposed to be home ten minutes ago," Derek said. I could tell that he was aggravated. Before leaving for the double date, my brother offered to stay up until we got home. I insisted that that wasn't necessary, of course, he did it anyway.

Isaac leaned against his bike with his arms crossed. He set his hands into his leather jacket, looking both ways on the street. "We're stuck on Martin Street," I said. Derek stopped what he was doing. I heard a pan hit the corner of the kitchen island. "What?" he said.

"Somebody decided not to get gas," I remarked, glaring at Isaac. Isaac scoffed and shook his head. Derek sighed on the other end of the line. "I'm on my way. Hang tight," he said. He hung up the phone. I dropped my cell phone into my purse, going back to hug my arms from the cold.

I stood beside him. His eyes were focused on the damp grass. He watched a few of the drops fall to the side of the green blades. I looked up at Isaac's expression. His brows were furrowed, small creases forming at the top of his forehead.

The two of us had been arguing more than usual. It seemed like we could never settle on something. Just last week, we had an argument about who should help Scott with something. Isaac wanted me to stay with him whereas I wanted to help Scott. Then, an argument sparked.

We haven't talked about that since last Thursday. The more days that passed, the more I worried our two-year-long relationship was ending. Peter liked to call arguments in relationships 'the great war.' I never really understood it.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover Uh-huh, the sweet dream was over My hand was the one you reached for All throughout the Great War

Isaac's hands gripped the bike's seat. I debated on setting a hand on top of his, wanting to reassure him that everything would be okay. "Why didn't we just call a tow company?" Issac spoke. He took his hands off the bike so I couldn't hold him. "We'd probably have to pay a fee or something," I said. Isaac nodded.

He looked like he wanted to debate my statement but decided against it. I opened my mouth to speak but was stopped by headlights heading in our direction. I turned to the left and saw Derek's truck. He got out of the truck.

"I've got some gas at the loft. Isaac, we can fill it up when we get there," Derek said. Isaac nodded. The two grabbed Isaac's bike and put it into the bed of the truck. Derek must've noticed the tension between me and Isaac. I went to step into the front seat but was stopped when Derek wrapped his hand around my wrist.

Always remember Uh-huh, tears on the letter I vowed not to cry anymore If we survived the Great War

He looked at me with raised brows, expecting an answer. "It's fine," I said. "Doesn't look fine," Derek let go. I fixed my purse and glanced at Isaac. Isaac sat in the back seat with his arms crossed, his head resting against the window. "It's nothing," I insisted.

Derek dropped it. I got into the front seat and he began driving home. It was quiet during the car ride. Derek occasionally changed the radio until he decided he got tired of listening to music. Though, I'd much rather listen to the radio than sit in silence. I was so happy to see the loft come into view.

After a few minutes, Isaac's bike was filled up with gas. Isaac decided to stay the night since it was already so late. Derek said his goodnight and went to his room. I laid awake with Isaac beside me, his back facing me. Isaac hadn't spoken to me since we got home. I watched his shoulders rise up and down as he breathed.

My mind kept returning to our past arguments. I ran a hand over my face, trying to push the images away. "Isaac, are you asleep?" I whispered. "Trying to," he replied, his voice muffled from the pillow. He flipped so his back was against the mattress. I rested my hands underneath my head, propping me up slightly.

"Are we breaking?" I asked. Isaac's brows furrowed at my question. He sat up, now leaning up against the headboard. "Because I feel like we are," I claimed. Isaac ran a hand through his hair before lowering his hand. He took my hand into his. "Isaac, I can't help but think that these past arguments are catching up to us," I said.

You drew up some good-faith treaties I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone You said I have to trust more freely But diesel is desire, you were playin' with fire

Six months ago, Isaac and I had disagreed with something, causing us to shout out accusations. I pulled away, afraid that it might happen again. I guess that should've been a clue that it might. His face softened. Isaac shook his head, letting my hand go. Maybe he didn't want to think about it? Or, maybe he just didn't want to admit it?

And maybe it's the past that's talkin' Screamin' from the crypt Tellin' me to punish you for things you never did So I justified it

"We're not breaking," he shook his head again, "If we were, I wouldn't be laying in bed with you. And I wouldn't have stuck with you for this long." He grabbed my hand, kissing my knuckles. Isaac looked at the chipped nail polish on my fingers. I sat up in the bed, my shoulder brushing against the pillow and headboard.

Isaac looked at every spot on my face, settling on a small scar on my cheek. He ran a finger over the scar, leaving his hand on the side of my face. I leaned into his touch. "I don't want to be a survivor of this great war," I said, "I don't want these arguments to continue. I want to fix this, I want to fix us." Isaac kissed my forehead.

He put his arms around me, bringing me into his chest. Isaac laid back down with me beside him. "There's no fixing us. We're okay, love, we're okay," Isaac mumbled. I knew I should believe him, I know I should, but there's a little voice inside my head that says I shouldn't.

_________

(Three Days Later - In the School Parking Lot)

Isaac followed me to my car, yelling. I brought out my keys. "Holy shit, Isaac. It wasn't that deep," I argued. I threw my backpack into the backseat. I opened the driver-side door, setting my water bottle and keys into the cup holder. I looked at him over my shoulder. "Oh don't give me that fucking look Y/N," he spat.

All that bloodshed, crimson clover Uh-huh, the bombs were close and My hand was the one you reached for All throughout the Great War

I was taken aback by his choice of words. My expression changed immediately. "I didn't do anything wrong," I said, "I was talking to Aiden, there was nothing there." Isaac scoffed, following me with his eyes. He grabbed my wrist but I yanked my arm out of his grasp. "What the hell is wrong with you? Don't you trust me?" I said.

He nodded in response. Isaac shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. "Do you? Because lately, it doesn't feel like that," I replied, "Y/N do this, Y/N don't do that. Y/N you shouldn't talk to him, you shouldn't talk to anyone other than me. Y/N, stop telling me what to do." I felt people's eyes on us, but I didn't pay any attention to them.

Isaac noticed small tears begin to form. "It's like you don't trust me anymore," I said, "It's like you've fallen out of love, and I have no idea why." He thought to himself for a second, not knowing what or how to say it. I waited for what felt like forever before getting into my car.

"Wait, Y/N/N," Isaac held the car door. I tried ripping his hand off the frame, but he was stronger than me. "I haven't fallen out of love for you," Isaac said. "Then, what is it?" I asked. His mouth opened, but no words came out. "Nothing? Absolutely nothing?" I continued, "Not one word?"

His eyes dropped to the concrete. I wiped a tear and got into my car. I was able to shut the door just as Isaac let go of it. He watched me pull out of the lot.

________

(Later That Night)

The TV played one of Derek's favorite reality shows. I yawned with my head against the couch cushion. Derek had gotten back from god knows what. All I knew was that he brought home groceries. He sat beside me, eating some mac n' cheese Peter surprisingly made.

Derek nudged my shoulder, noticing that I had been quiet all evening. "What's wrong?" he inquired. "Nothing," I replied, not taking my focus away from the show. Derek paused the show and set the remote on the armrest.

"Y/N, I think you forget that I'm a werewolf," Derek said, resting an arm on the back of the couch. "Isaac and I are arguing. Like, nonstop," I informed. Derek's brows narrowed in confusion. He always thought that me and Isaac were okay.

But I guess looks can be deceiving. He motioned for me to continue. "I honestly don't even know why," I shrugged, "One month, we just started disagreeing on every single thing. And, I've searched my mind for any damn reason, but nothing speaks out. I have tried desperately to think what Isaac might be thinking. When I ask, I get the same answer."

Derek nodded as I spoke. I wiped a stray tear away. I hated crying in front of people, especially in front of the person who would quite literally kill anyone who got in my way.

It turned into something bigger Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed Your finger on my hairpin triggers Soldier down on that icy ground Looked up at me with honor and truth

"Derek, it's changed," I looked at him. His face fell at the state of my eyes. "I feel like I should break up with him," I added, "Because I can't continue thinking that everything is going to end right then and there. I can't continue arguing with him, it just breaks me and Isaac."

Broken and blue, so I called off the troops That was the night I nearly lost you I really thought I had lost you

Derek nodded again. He opened his arms, gesturing for me to hug him. He gave me a reassuring squeeze. Derek let go of me, his hands resting on my shoulders. "You can try to piece everything together, maybe say a little prayer, even," Derek said, "But there's no victory in this. Just like you said."

He paused and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. Derek fixed my t-shirt before continuing. "It's not fair to either of you. Those terrible moments that the two of you have are embedded in your relationship. You can't go back, neither of you can. You've said things that can't be returned," Derek finished.

Derek kissed my forehead and gave me a much-needed hug. For the rest of the night, we talked about my situation and watched the rest of his show.

________

(The Next Day, at the loft)

After last night's talk with Derek, I decided to call Isaac over. He was happy that I called him since we hadn't talked since yesterday. Isaac sat in front of me with his hands sitting in his lap. He stared at me (GIF Above) as I played with my fingers, chipping off the polish.

Isaac reached an arm out and took my hands. I looked up at his eyes, feeling like there was some part of him that knew what was coming. And then, I began to regret what I was about to do. I still loved him, and he still loved me.

"Isaac," I cleared my throat, "I've thought this over and over again, but I can't think of a better way to tell you this." I let go of his hand, going back to picking at the chipped nail polish. Isaac nodded and sat up in his spot.

To that bloodshed, crimson clover Uh-huh, the worst was over My hand was the one you reached for All throughout the Great War

Isaac let out a heavy sigh, nodding his head. "I know," he said, "I know what you're about to say, Y/N. You don't have to say it." I looked away from the ground, feeling his eyes land on me. I felt a wave of relief wash over me, but it slowly faded. "You shouldn't regret it," Isaac said.

Uh-huh, we're burned for better I vowed I would always be yours 'Cause we survived the Great War

"I'm sorry," I said. "Why're you sorry?" he replied. Isaac's voice was soft and gentle as he spoke. "Because I hurt you," I croaked, swallowing the lump in my throat. Isaac shook his head and hugged me tightly.

"We hurt each other," he clarified, "But I'll always love you, Y/N. I hope you know that." I nodded with my head against his chest. He set one last kiss on my head.

I would always be yours 'Cause we survived the Great War Uh-huh I vowed I would always be yours

[oh-my-wolfstar]

Taylor Swift Wolfstar songs day 4

Today's song is The Great War. This song is POV Remus, set after Sirius returns. This song has soooo many references but for the sake of space, I can't do them all so I highly encourage you to go listen to it.

My knuckles were bruised like violets Sucker punching walls, cursed you as I sleep-talked Spineless in my tomb of silence

Remus was badly hurt after the war, physically and mentally. He withdrew from everyone but wasn't able to stop cursing Sirius, even years later.

My hand was the one you reached for All throughout the Great War

They were together for the whole war, Remus was the one Sirius depended on.

You drew up some good faith treaties I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone You said I have to trust more freely

Sirius is out and making amends but Remus is still alone, transforming by himself and never letting anyone in. pre lie low at lupins.

And maybe it's the past that's talkin' Screamin' from the crypt Tellin' me to punish you for things you never did

Remus cant let go of the years when he though Sirius betrayed him

I vowed not to fight anymore If we survived the Great War

Remus remembers that he wanted to be with Sirius if they survived the war, that he wanted to live in a better world

Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed Your finger on my hair pin triggers

Flash back to when Remus though Sirius had gone to the dark side

There's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair And we will never go back

Remus realizes there is nothing he can do to change the past, to stop the people he loved from dying. But he can go forward.

Always remember Uh-huh, we're burned for better I vowed I would always be yours 'Cause we survived the Great War

Even though they've been hurt and they've lost, they've also grown up. Remus realizes that he will always love Sirius and they vow to be together forever; they survived together.

Ahhh, this song is so wolfstar, I cant. Lmk in the comments if you want tomorrow to be a happy song or a sad one. (also lmk if you have requests or recs)

[ohgaylor]

afterglow 🤝 hoax 🤝 the great war 🤝 death by a thousand cuts 🤝 long story short (parallels / analyses)

always remember // flashbacks waking me up // flashes of the battle come back to me in a blur // I tried to pick my battles 'til the battle picked me

my knuckles were bruised like violets, sucker punching walls // fighting with a true love is boxing with no gloves // don't want no other shade of blue but you // I blew things out of proportion, now you're blue, put you in jail for something you didn’t do // and maybe it's the past that's talking, screaming from the crypt telling me to punish you for things you never did, so I justified it

I lived like an island, punished you with silence // cursed you as I sleep-talked, spineless in my tomb of silence // misery like the war of words I shouted in my sleep // my sleepless night, my winless fight

somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed // my best laid plan, your sleight of hand // paper cut stings from our paper-thin plans // your finger on my hairpin triggers // my twisted knife // you knew the password so I let you in the door // my only one, my smoking gun, my eclipsed sun, this has broken me down

tore your banners down, took the battle underground // I look through the windows of this love, even though we boarded them up // I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone // chandelier's still flickering here 'cause I can't pretend it's okay when it's not

and what once was ours is no one's now I see you everywhere, the only thing we share is this small town // you know I left a part of me back in New York // my kingdom come undone // our country, guess it was a lawless land

stood on the cliffside screaming, "give me a reason" // long story short, it was a bad time, pushed from the precipice, climbed right back up the cliff

I don’t wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you // that was the night I nearly lost you, I really thought I'd lost you // this has frozen my ground // soldier down on that icy ground, looked up at me with honor and truth, broken and blue, so I called off the troops // thought I had reason to attack, but no // when I dropped my sword, I threw it in the bushes and knocked on your door

the worst was over, my hand was the one you reached for all throughout the great war // your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in // no more keepin' score, now I just keep you warm // we're burned for better // I am ash from your fire // always remember the burning embers

no more tug of war, now I just know there's more // this ultraviolet morning light below tells me this love is worth the fight // and we will never go back to that bloodshed, crimson clover // I vowed I would always be yours ‘cause we survived the Great War // and we live in peace, but if someone comes at us, this time, I'm ready