#my kimbap is ruined

[femdomlieeh]

Notebook of a fool ✧ Xiaojun

BFF!Xiaojun ✧ Crush!Fem!Reader

WC—3.8 ✧ k

WARNING—anxiety ✧ heartbreak ✧ crying ✧ pet names

THEMES—sfw ✧ light angst ✧ future fluff (?) ✧ best friend au ✧ crush au

NOW PLAYING—OTT ✧ IVE

A/N. 누나 (nuna) = older sister

psst! Next update is a Beomgyu smut… probably my fav smut I’ve ever written

M.LISTS—wayv ✧ latest updates ✧ read on wp

All rights reserved © femdomlieeh

✧ ੈ ✧ ‧₊˚ * ੈ ✧‧₊˚＊* ੈ ✧ ‧₊˚ * ੈ ✧‧₊˚＊* ✧ ੈ ✧

Today was one of those bad fucking days. One of those days when you can't find any positivity in anything. One of those days when you don't feel like talking to the people you love the most. One of those days when you just want to give up.

The first thing you saw in the morning was a notification of a text from your boyfriend. Looking at the white speech bubble is something you usually look forward to when you see Wonwoo's name bright up your screen, knowing he always has something entertaining to tell.

But this particular morning he said something you wish were a joke.

Wonwoo Boo💞

[ive been thinking lately and _____ i think we need a break]

Mommy🤠💦

[You're not going to tell me why?]

Seen 10:17

You asked him the first thing that came to your mind. He couldn't possibly just expect you to be OK with having a break without a reason, right?

After an hour you accepted the fact that he had left you on read and that he wasn't going to reply anytime soon.

Maybe it was because he called you _____.

He never called you by your name. Only your friends called you that. He was supposed to call you weird or cheesy pet names and nothing else! 

He left you with a headache. He left you with your bad thoughts and theories. Damn you, Wonwoo.

It was very human-like of you to be in a bad mood. Only a robot would feel nothing in this situation. The day wouldn't get any worse. You were going to make sure of it! Your mood may have been bad, but you weren't going to let anyone else get affected by it. Lashing out on innocent people because you don't feel good on the inside is something you hated doing.

Today you were going to hang out with your best friend, Xiaojun, have a picnic on a park next to the Han river. Xiaojun had packed a cute pink basket (that he had specifically bought for you two to use for picnics together since they happened at least thrice a month) which was filled with kimchi kimbap, green grapes, two clementines and some churro flavored chips and you had packed a large outdoor blanket so Xiaojun wouldn't have too much to carry. For almost a week you two hadn't met up and you both missed each other and wanted to make up for the days you had spent apart so of course you went for the nice, typical not-romantic-at-all picnic hang out session.

But no.

You weren't going to meet Xiaojun and ruin his parade with the rain cloud that was following you around wherever you went since you opened your eyes this dark morning. No, you weren't going to let the first time you two meet in such a long time be ruined by the sad news you got this ugly morning.

누나 🥰

[I can't hang out today, sorry]

Prince Junnie🦄

[why not?☹️]

누나 🥰

[I'm not feeling too well]

Prince Junnie🦄

[it's ok i'll make u some delicious soup😊]

누나 🥰

[No, you don't need to, I don't want you to get sick!]

Prince Junnie🦄

[but ive missed u sm☹️]

누나 🥰

[We'll meet another day I promise to make up for this!]

And so you put the phone gently on the table to lay on the sofa and binge watch some random show. You made sure to turn your phone off first since you knew you'd cut Wonwoo some slack in case you read any persuasive text from him — he's good with words and making you feel loved. Whilst you were looking through all the lists Netflix had created for you, which were filled with movies and series you either had already seen or weren't interested in, Xiaojun was still expectantly waiting for his screen to go bright.

She must be joking, he thought.

Unlike you, Xiaojun's morning had started out brilliant. From the moment he opened his eyes, he was smiling and full of energy, excited to hang out with you after not seeing you for five whole days. He had missed you. Spending time with you was one of his favorite hobbies! Since you two had picnics regularly you two had decided that you would take turns in deciding and packing the picnic basket and this time it was Xiaojun's turn! He had been so excited all week, planning out a shopping list days before. He had specifically purchased grapes this time because he had this fantasy of putting one in your mouth (which sounded weird, but it would feel intimate to feed you fruit) and also playing around and throwing grapes up in the air and catching them in the mouth. 

Needless to say, he liked you a little more than a best friend should and that was a bit of a problem. His friends kept telling him that it was stupid to spend so much time with you and that Xiaojun should either try to ignore his emotions or he should distance himself from you until he loses feelings, because it was unfair to hurt himself by giving himself false hopes of getting somewhere with a taken girl. 

And Xiaojun knew it. For so long, he'd known that it was a bad idea to like you. You didn't like him in the same way, and you even had a boyfriend for fuck's sake — and a really pretty one at that! But no matter how many red flags there were, he still wanted to spend everyday with you. He didn't want a week to go by without being with you. He wanted to cuddle with you on a picnic blanket. He wanted to kiss you when you visited photo booths. He wanted to share hoodies with you. He wanted to stay up late and talk until you two fell asleep in each others' arms. He wanted to be the only one you called Prince. 

Wondering why you called Xiaojun 'Prince' when you already were in a relationship with Wonwoo? Well, Prince had been Xiaojun's nickname before you even met Wonwoo (yes, you'd known Xiaojun longer than you'd known Wonwoo, yet you still found yourself in a relationship with the latter — or not anymore actually). And though your (then) boyfriend never liked it, you had convinced him it was just a friendly pet name. Because that's exactly what it was.

To you.

To Xiaojun it was the closest he'd ever feel to being your boyfriend. But you started using that pet name less and ever since Wonwoo came around and ruined everything more than it already was ruined. Xiaojun even had to change his contact name on your phone to include the word 'Prince' so you wouldn't forget to call him that.

He loathed Wonwoo.

Wonwoo was always the reason why you couldn't hang out with your bestfriend for too long, why you couldn't call him Prince on certain occasions and why you couldn't look at him as a potential boyfriend. Wonwoo was an attention thief. Not really. But it felt like it. Xiaojun was jealous of everything Wonwoo had with you.

Because your boyfriend obviously was a threat, Xiaojun felt like he needed even more of your validation than before (which was already a lot). He needed your attention. If you ignored him he'd think it was your way of telling him that you had left him completely for Wonwoo. Ridiculous! He shouldn't feel like you owe attention to him.

Your friendly fucking friendship was the closest thing Xiaojun had to being together with you in the way he really wanted, so he valued it a lot. Not having you as his girlfriend was painful enough, but not having you as even his friend would break him.

Right now you weren't validating your time together, nor your friendship — or at least it felt like it to Xiaojun. He always needed your attention and unlike normally, he wasn't getting it right now. His smile dropped and so did his excitement for the day.

Was this the end?

He knew that spending one week without each other would lead to more time for you to spend with your damn boyfriend but he didn't know it would lead to the end of your friendship. 

No way he'd bail on the picnic plans.

Prince Junnie🦄

[can i pls come over? i bought fruits for u<33 i'm sure fruits is exactly what u need right now!!]

Prince Junnie🦄

[idc if i get sick or not bc i still wanna hang out w u]

Prince Junnie🦄

[pls 누나]

Sent 11:33

You had ignored him only once before and it was a horrible experience.

The way you ignored him (on accident) was so hurtful that he had to leave the gathering that he had looked forward to for so long, confusing the other guests, to go and lock himself in a bathroom so he could cry without bothering anyone. You'd gone right after him since you knew it wasn't very Xiaojun-like to leave a fun time for no reason. After you had knocked on the door and reassured him you were his best friend and not a random person coming to make fun of him, he let you in the bathroom.

The sight you were met by was his crumbling figure on the floor and overflowing tears on his cheeks. He had thought that you wanted nothing to do with him. Stupid you didn't see the obvious signs. It was because of the fact that you hadn't paid any attention to him that Xiaojun had gotten the idea that you had grown bored of him or that you wanted to leave him for Wonwoo (he hadn't told you the latter part, of course). And weeks later you did get together with Wonwoo. And that made him cry himself to sleep for days which you never knew.

How much your lack of attention and affection for Xiaojun had affected him was scary. And a fucking sign, you idiot. Nobody gets so worked up over the loss of affection of someone they view as a friend. Ever since that incident you'd made sure to always remind him of how much you value your friendship.

Except for today.

He thought he had made it clear enough to you that you never ever should ignore him unless you really meant It. Unless you really wanted to part ways. To go from the bestest friends to cold acquaintances. Some people might think it's crazy to be this attached to a best friend but you weren't just his best friend. You were his love and happiness. Without you he didn't have either.

Five minutes passed since he triple texted you and he still had no reply. Slowly he felt how his tummy was turning into knots and how his eyes started stinging.

Prince Junnie🦄

[ur making me worried]

Prince Junnie🦄

[hey!! text me so ik u didn't die from choking on strawberry milk 누나😰]

Prince Junnie🦄

[r u ignoring me?🫠]

Prince Junnie🦄

[unless u have corona, meet me by the river at 6 if u care abt me. i need to talk to u abt smth important]

Sent 12:04

If you didn't show up he knew for sure that you had left him behind forever. If you did show up then he'd confess to you. So spontaneously he couldn't keep his feelings away from you for another year because it wasn't healthy and he knew it. He knew he would have to tell you about his feelings sooner or later. And after being without you for a whole ass week and after experiencing the cruel punishment that is being ignored and even thinking you broke your dear friendship off, he knew the time had come for him to finally woman up and confess.

Whilst he was anxiously thinking through why he made such a bold move and possibly ruined any future he had with you, the girl he loved was being lazy and stuffing her face in pillows in front of a TV.

one season of Bojack Horseman later...

Tossed between blankets and an overflow of pillows, your tummy roared like a lion. You hadn't eaten anything yet. Maybe it was time to do something other than numbing your feelings with Netflix and the drinks you had at home? As you stood up you felt heavy. You had moved maximum 100 meters in the past few hours — to go to the bathroom, then kitchen and back to the living room — and it had taken a toll on your body physically.

Fuck.

You sat back down on your sofa and brought your phone to view after hours without it.

[6 new messages from Prince Junnie🦄]

Fuck. The last message was sent so long ago. You looked at your windows. It was dark outside. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. As fast as you physically could, you put on a pair of shoes and a jacket with your aching limbs.

In just a few minutes you were on your way to the closest bus station. The whole bus ride to the river was filled with thoughts putting you down. Your favorite person in the world was sensitive about this stuff and you hurt him. You were supposed to not let your bad mood affect anybody around you. But who were you kidding? Of course something had to go wrong with an idea you constructed and analyzed for four microseconds.

Before you knew it you had arrived at the destination. You were speed walking to the river. You two always went to the exact same spot by the river since it was usually vacant, by some miracle, and had a pretty view of a bridge.

You were naive enough to think that isolating yourself from your bestfriend and your phone would help solve your problems, so you were certainly naive enough to go and check if Xiaojun was still at your meeting place hours after you were supposed to meet him. What if he wasn't there? What if he was there?

The water was shimmering from the moonlight and next to it was a bench and an athletic, tall silhouette. Your eyes widened. Could it be...? Sniffles. That's the sound that came from their direction. You walked closer and could make out the lines of a figure that was all too familiar.

"Prince?"

The silhouette turned around and though it was dark you could see that it in fact was him. You quickly sat down beside him and noticed that a couple of notebooks were scattered on the ground next to a bike. You didn't know what to do, never having seen glad Xiaojun cry. After another particularly loud sniffle you turned your attention back to him. The light of the moon exposed the redness and tears on his face. For hours he'd been outside and his face was still wet with tears.

"Why are you still out at this hour?"

He choked on his tears and rested his face in his hands, "Because I'm a fool."

"No, you're not a—"

"Why are you here?" he interrupted you.

Touché.

"You told me to meet you if I care about you."

"You come here hours later as if I don't mean anything to you," he hurried out before his voice could crack.

"I'm sorry about that. But if I didn't care about you I wouldn't show up at all," you spoke with a soft tone. The last thing you wanted was to be harsh, especially since you were the reason your best friend was upset.

"Why did you do this to me, 누나?" he looked you in the eyes as if he'd find any answers inside them.

"I promise I didn't do it on purpose. I would never hurt you on purpose," you took his hands into yours, oblivious to how the simple gesture made Xiaojun a bit hopeful on the inside.

His hands were so cold it was shocking that he was shaking because of his crying and not because of the ice-like coldness. That's what happens when you're out for hours when there's no sun — or person — to keep you warm.

"I saw the messages 20 minutes ago and got here immediately. I would never purposely ignore you, Prince."

You made sure to use his nickname in almost every sentence you spoke, silently telling him that you don't want to fight. Slowly you brought his hands to your lips and kissed them lightly, five kisses on each hand for every finger. He looked at your lovely action and felt how his tears were slowing down. The kisses didn't make him warm — maybe for a second — but at least they made him feel somewhat better inside.

"I'm so, so sorry you had to be here in the cold," you apologized and kept his hands in yours as an attempt to warm them.

One part of Xiaojun wanted to continue being mad and make you feel bad for the hurt you'd caused him but the bigger part wanted you to hold him in your arms. He loved you and couldn't stay mad at you for long even if he tried.

"I-It's OK, 누나. At least you're here now," he whispered and looked at your locked hands, admiring the sight since it may never happen again — or maybe he should make sure his hands are cold more often—

You sent him a sorrowful smile and let his head rest on your shoulder, resting your own against it as an instinct, both from being comfortable and tired.

"From now on I will check if I have any texts every hour for you," you said with an exaggerated joking voice to lighten the mood.

He giggled. You weren't even being that funny but you were both tired and sad, so anything even a tiny bit funny was hilarious to both of you.

"What did you want to tell me before, Prince?" you whispered into his fluffy hair and petted it.

Should he tell you how he feels? Should he possibly ruin this? If he told you how he truly felt, would you ever kiss him hands like you did just now? Would you ever touch him this caringly ever again? Would you continue to call him Prince? Or would all of that be gone due to your loyalty to your sweet precious boyfriend Wonwoo?

For hours Xiaojun had been outside in the cold waiting for the love of his life so he could tell her the truth. But it took time before you, the love of his life, showed up. Too long.

When a person is alone outside with notebooks filled with blank pages to write feelings and stories in, it's easy to let emotions take over. He ended up writing around seven poems. Some poems were really cheesy and written in the spirit of the moment. Some didn't even rhyme. Some were a perfect description of where he was in him non-existent love life.

But they all had one thing in common.

They were melancholic and written from the point of view of a man who was hopelessly in love with his best friend.

"Nothing. I just wanted to have a picnic with you, 누나. I was just being dramatic to convince you to come despite feeling under the weather," he lied right through his teeth.

That made no sense because you two had never been on a picnic after sunset and Xiaojun would never lie to make you come see him. But you were tired and desperate to leave the cold outside, so you chuckled lightly, believing him immediately.

"Then where are the snacks?" you asked, confused since the only things around you were notebooks, a bike and water.

"I ate them."

Laughter filled the air; your genuine one and his fake one.

You put your face in his cheek, making him blush (not that you'd notice, since his cheeks were already red from before), "Well, my tummy is a little too thin right now, so let's go somewhere."

"In the middle of the night?" he questioned.

"Yes," you smiled against his cheek and he felt it, making him smile too.

"OK."

You both were still smiling when you were picking up all the notebooks to get ready for the ride. Jokes were thrown here and there. It was as if nothing had happened. You both knew it was a misunderstanding and you valued the friendship with the other too much to put energy into arguing. And you were tired too, so the argument wouldn't even be that epic even if you tried.

"What about your bike?" 

"Oh nooo! The buses are always so full now that it's too late to take the subway!" Xiaojun whined.

"You know what? Since I was a jerk you can go take a warm bus while I ride in the cold," you said impulsively.

"B-But, 누나—" he smiled, flattered. 

"B-But nothing," you interrupted him and sat down on the bike. Anyone who had spoken to you knew you were stubborn. He laughed. The little sadness he had left was gone by now. His cheeks were dry. Still red, but not from crying, now they were red from blushing.

"OK, whatever you say, 누나."

"You brought a transport card right?" you made sure since he came by bike.

"Yes I did~ See you in an hour, 누나," he winked at you and waved with a smile brighter than the moon before running to the bus that just arrived.

You waved back to him and got ready to bike — you definitely needed a head start. But before you started you couldn't help but see something white standing out in the darkness.

It was another one of Xiaojun's notebooks. You must've been too tired to notice it when you were picking them up. Thankfully the notebook was open or else you wouldn't have noticed it as it had a dark cover. You took it into your hands. To make sure it really was Xiaojun's you needed to read at least a snippet.

You prayed it was Xiaojun's because it would be worse if you read a stranger's private thoughts than your best friend's since you already knew all him secrets. The snippet was Xiaojun's. It was from one of the pages of poems that didn't rhyme, that was very cheesy but depicted how sappy he was feeling and also told him part of the story that you never knew.

I want to feel my best friend's lips on my lips

I want, more than anything, her to call me HER Prince

You drop the book on the grass. So that's what he wanted to tell you.

[okaylikeschaewon]

Part 7: Rooftop

With a passed out Chaeyoung in your arms, you carefully opened the door to their apartment. After the first step in, you were greeted by Tzuyu who was walking around all dressed up, as if she had just arrived home.

“Oh! H-Happy birthday!” she stammered, blushing profusely.

“Thanks Tzuyu,” you replied with a smile as you put Chaeyoung down on their couch, remembering Tzuyu’s feelings towards being carried. As you turned back, your heart sank as you saw her expectant expression. “Oh, umm, thank you for the gift.”

“You didn’t open it, did you?” she asked, immediately figuring it out.

“Not yet…” you muttered, embarrassed by your thoughtlessness.

A weak smile to hide her pain and a subtle nod is all she gave you before turning away and avoiding eye contact. Before either of you could say more, Dahyun entered the living room.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” she screamed while running at you and jumping into your arms.

Over her shoulder, you saw Tzuyu walk to her room and close the door behind her. You felt terrible, but you decided to suck it up to avoid ruining your plans with Dahyun.

“I’m so excited for this,” you said while squeezing the soft girl in your arms.

She hopped down and looked up at you with the brightest of bright smiles. “I made you something!” she squealed while handing you a little container.

“Oh? What’s this?” you asked while opening the lid to find a bunch of chocolate.

“Completely from scratch!” she said proudly as you took out one of the pieces of chocolate. “I even started with the cacao beans."

“Wow Dahyun I am impressed, this tastes really good.”

“Does it?” she asked with a slight pout of her lips. “I haven’t actually tried a piece myself, I was too nervous.”

“Here,” you held out a little piece for her which she accepted directly into her mouth before her eyes shot open.

“Wait, it’s actually not bad.”

“That’s what I just said,” you laughed while taking another bite. “So, where are you taking me for lunch?”

“It’s a secret!” Dahyun said happily before grabbing a bag from the kitchen counter. She walked back over to you and held her hand out for you to take. With her little fingers interlocked with yours, the two of you walked out of the apartment towards the elevators.

“What’s in the bag?”

She pressed the button for up before smiling at you again. “I spent the morning making kimbap,” she answered. “That and the chocolate. Oh, and remind me to send you home with some extra for Sana.”

“Will do,” you replied as the two of you walked into the elevator. It did sting just a tiny bit knowing Sana still hadn’t even sent you a text or anything. Maybe she forgot? You ignored it, figuring it wasn’t that big of a deal, before turning your attention back to Dahyun. “By the way, you hit the wrong button dummy.”

“No I didn’t.”

“You did, you pressed the button for up.”

“I know.”

Confused, you watched as she entered the elevator and then pressed the button for the top floor. When the elevator arrived, she held her hand out again and guided you down the hallway.

“Dahyun are we even supposed to be here?” you asked as she opened what looked like a maintenance door.

“It’s fine, I’ve done this before.”

“What exactly is this?”

“Come see for yourself,” she teased while opening another door.

As you followed her, it almost felt like you suddenly entered a new world. It was gorgeous. The door opened up directly to the roof where you could clearly see the Han River below. People were walking around, going about their daily business, like little ants scurrying for food.

“Dahyun…” you muttered, at a loss for words as you overlooked the view. “How’d you find this place?”

“I was exploring the building one day when I found it,” she explained. “I love living with Chae and Tzuyu, but sometimes I just like being completely alone. I would often come up here to be alone with my thoughts.”

“This feels like something straight out of a movie.”

“I guess it is a bit cliché,” she laughed while reaching into the bag and pulling out a blanket to sit on. “Regardless, I wanted to share my little special spot with you.”

“Thank you, Dahyun, this really does mean a lot to me,” you said while taking a seat next to the smiling girl. You kissed her on the cheek gently before helping her unpack the bag, noticing a subtle blush on her cheeks as you took out her homemade kimbap.

—

“Art museum?” Dahyun asked.

The two of you looked at each other before speaking at the same time.

“Chaeyoung.”

“Yeah that one was easy,” Dahyun sighed while laying down onto your lap. “What about something athletic, some sort of sport?”

“Well, I already have to workout with you girls all the time,” you said while resting your hand on her stomach. “Momo makes me go to the gym with her, Nayeon makes me do pilates with her, but I think golfing with Jihyo would be pretty fun.”

“You’re into golfing? Since when?”

“Not at all,” you answered with a smile, “but I’d go to the range with her. You girls look so damn cute in those Pearly Gates outfits.”

Dahyun started to laugh while you checked your phone.

“You know, we’ve been up here for almost three hours.”

“Has it really been that long?” Dahyun giggled. “Alright last one. Which member would you take to an amusement park?”

“Ah, and I’m still not allowed to pick you, right?”

“Stop trying to pick me,” Dahyun chuckled. “The whole point is that I want to hear which other member you would take.”

“Hmm, in that case,” you contemplated while lightly stroking Dahyun’s hair. “Momo.”

“Momo?” she gasped with her eyebrows furrowed. “I agree she’s pretty and all, but I don’t get that one. She’s terrified of rides.”

“I know, but I think it would be fun forcing her to go on them with me,” you explained while stifling a little laugh. “Also, she’d be down to try every single piece of food we could find.”

“Ah, okay that makes more sense,” Dahyun agreed. “It would be pretty funny seeing Mina all scared, too.”

“You’re one to talk by the way! You’d be just as scared as those two,” you chuckled while giving her cheek a playful poke on the cheek.

“No I wouldn’t,” she protested with a pout before her demeanor cracked and she started giggling, knowing that you were right.

“Alright how about I ask you which member you’d take out,” you suggested.

“I’m going on dates with Twice members?”

“It doesn’t have to be romantic, I meant more for fun,” you explained. “Unless you want it to be romantic.”

She gave you a strange look before nodding, “what did you have in mind.”

“Who would you take to a candlelit dinner?”

“Yah, what kind of friends go to a candlelit dinner?” she huffed, crossing her arms. “Give me a real suggestion.”

“Fine,” you laughed. “Who would you go on a trip abroad with?”

“Whoa, that’s…” she paused, pondering the question. “I think I’d pick Nayeon.”

“Oh? I’m not surprised, but why her?”

“I feel like she’d be fun to go with,” Dahyun answered. “I watched her whole Hawaii vlog, and I couldn’t stop wishing that I was there.”

“That’s so sweet of you.”

“I don’t really know how to explain it, but I feel safe around Nayeon.”

“Well, I think it makes sense,” you explained. “People might not notice it, but Nayeon really is always looking out for you guys.”

“I guess you’re right,” Dahyun said softly. “You know, back in the day I seriously got upset because she would always leave when I would show up on vlive. I made it a bit of a joke, but I was actually upset about it.”

“Oh yeah? This must have been before I joined the team.”

“Yeah, it was, but afterwards in private Nayeon came up to me. I realized after that how much she actually cares for us.”

“That’s so sweet.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty lucky to be around people like this,” Dahyun added softly.

“All of these date ideas sound pretty fun. What about you, where do you want to go?” you asked softly while rubbing her arm absentmindedly, staring into the distance as the sun began to set.

“Bold of you to assume I’d want to go on a date with you,” she mocked you while smiling.

“Ah good point, alright well then pretend for a second that you’re going to go on a date with someone else, where are you picking?” you responded while poking her in the ribs.

After pondering the question for a bit, she looked directly up at you again with a tender expression.

“I don’t know, maybe something along the lines of sitting alone on a roof with a guy I like for a few hours.”

Your hand paused while your eyes met with hers. The afternoon had been full of casual flirting and cheesy lines like this, but this one felt more real. It wasn’t clear if she was being facetious.

“Lucky guy,” you said, staring into the distance.

Time seemed to stop for just a moment - a pause, a second alone with your thoughts - then, without warning, Dahyun stood up and walked over to the edge of the rooftop. She began to lean against the parapet, the wind gently blowing her skirt around as she watched the sun setting in front of her. It was a beautiful sight: Dahyun’s gorgeous body eclipsing the sunset, the orange glow surrounding her hourglass frame.

After a short moment of admiration, you stood up and walked behind her. She didn’t react as you wrapped your arms around her from behind, nor did she react when you kissed her cheek. Inch by inch, the sun disappeared over the horizon, leaving the river below shimmering. It was beautiful. The two of you stood there peacefully, enjoying the sight, when suddenly you heard a sniffle.

“Dahyun?”

Still, no response, but she let you turn her around. With her back to the sunset, that amber glow surrounding her pale skin gave her a divine aura, one of true beauty. She had dewy eyes, but her minimal eyeliner remained untouched. Before you could say anything else, she kissed you.

She held her face right in front of yours after it ended, her untouched eyeliner no longer untouched. Behind her, the sun had set, dimming the entire world around you. She reached forward with her hands, grabbing yours and squeezing.

“Alone on a rooftop with a guy I like,” she whispered into your face.

“You sure you wouldn’t go on a date with me?”

Dahyun giggled as a couple of tears slid down her face, letting go of your hands to wipe them away. She was smiling, but you could see through the facade.

“One day maybe,” she mumbled before starting to turn back.

“Dahyun,” you said sternly while grabbing onto her again, refusing to let her turn away.

She bit her lip, not wanting to open up, but your insistent eye contact eventually convinced her.

“It’s just really… I feel like… I’ve just been trying so hard.”

It was your turn to kiss her.

“Dahyun, I notice your effort.”

“Do you really, though?”

There was another pause.

“Am I just not good enough for you?” she asked as her voice cracked, but this time no tears came.

“How could you ever think that?” you responded with a hint of anger, unable to hide your passion for her.

“It just feels like you’re always picking the other girls, am I being crazy?”

Instinctually, you wanted to affirm her belief, you wanted to call her crazy for ever thinking that you didn’t find her good enough. However, you held back and looked from her perspective. She probably understood that your job was difficult, juggling nine girls, but it was probably still not easy to see you with the others.

“You’re not being crazy,” you said carefully. “I’m not perfect, all I can do is my best when it comes to being fair to all nine of you.”

“I know, you’re trying your best,” she sighed heavily. “I’m being selfish again, aren’t I?”

Again, you kissed her, but this time you were more soft and reassuring.

“No, you’re not being too selfish.”

“Then why do I feel this way?” she cried out in pain. “I just can’t shake this feeling.”

“You have worked your butt off for years, all that effort as a trainee, those years of hard work after debut,” you pointed out. “It’s completely reasonable for you to want more. In fact, you deserve more.”

She looked up into your eyes, her self-consciousness palpable.

“Do I?” she whispered.

“Yes,” you muttered, kissing her lips again. “You deserve the whole world, and then some.”

“I don’t want the world.”

“Tell me what you want.”

She bit her lip, unsure what to say. It was on the tip of her tongue, the words just weren’t coming out.

“Be selfish,” you whispered to her. “Forget everything else, be selfish. Tell me what you want.”

More hesitation.

“Forget about my job, just tell me exactly what you want,” you pushed.

She continued to waver, biting her lower lip again while you stared deeply into her eyes. She was nervous, unsure if it was appropriate to speak her mind. It wasn’t until you gave her hand a soft squeeze did she finally speak up.

“I want you,” she whispered.

“Then I’m yours.”

“I want you to lust for me.”

“I already do.”

“Show me how much you lust for me,” she added softly before kissing you briefly. “It’s your day, I want you to take what you want.”

“The only thing I want is you,” you mumbled, kissing her lips again while your hands slipped up her skirt.

“Make me feel wanted,” she moaned as you kissed her neck. “Make me feel… special…” (lol)

“You are special,” you grumbled into her neck, kneading her soft ass with your hands.

“Then hurry up and do it. Take me right here. Right now.”

“Right here?”

“Yes,” she moaned as you began toying with the wetness between her legs.

“Right now?”

“Stop teasing!”

With an added roughness, you slipped her underwear off, dropping it down to her ankles. You stared into her eyes. There was doubt, worry, insecurity. She still wasn’t entirely confident in herself, but you weren’t going to let her keep that presumption. You ripped her shirt off, leaving her in just her bra and skirt. Next came her bra as you reached around her back, swiftly undoing the strap and letting it fall to the ground.

She stood there with her bare breasts open to the world, the cool air making her nipples taut and firm. One arm came up across her chest, covering the beautifully shaped curves, and you ignored it temporarily as you crouched down and lowered her skirt to the ground. You took a single step back and admired her body - her bright red face, one arm across her chest, the other covering between her legs which were squeezed tight together.

“That’s not allowed,” you said while grabbing both of her hands, pulling them away so that her nude body was fully displayed. “Don’t look away.”

As she started to look at you, you picked up her right hand and pressed your lips against the back of it, staring back into her eyes. Then, with your eyes now on her body, you kissed her forearm. Then her bicep, her shoulder, the side of her right tit, her hip.

Then you crouched down, pausing face level with the wet part between her legs. Next, you planted a kiss on her thigh, followed by her shin. With a final bend, you kissed the top of her right foot before pausing, shifting over the left foot and kissing the top of it as well.

As you moved up her body from the other side, instead of kissing it, you ran your tongue across her skin. All the way from her shin, up to her chest, her soft body conformed to the pressure of your tongue - a subtle line of wetness left behind. When you got to her left tit, instead of kissing the side, you pressed your lips directly against her nipple - this earned you a gentle moan. Then you kissed her shoulder, while her left arm hung down next to her body.

Slowly, you began to kiss down her left arm, crouching down as you went closer to her hand. With a final kiss on the back of her left hand, you shifted your body over slightly so that you were between her legs.

She looked down at you, as you looked up at her. You’ve never seen Dahyun blush this hard before, that messy eyeliner making her eyes that much more gorgeous. With the sun completely set at this point, the night sky above was shining down on the two of you.

While staring directly into her eyes, you leaned forward and pressed your lips between her legs, finally getting a taste of her ecstasy. As soon as your lips touched the skin, Dahyun let out a long, drawn out breath through her barely-open mouth. As your tongue escaped your lips, finding refuge on Dahyun’s moist folds, she started to moan into the sky.

Licking and sucking, left and right, up and down. Anything you could do to make her moan louder, you did. The taste was driving you insane, an ever-growing sense of lust developing inside you. She wanted you, but you couldn’t get enough of her. Even though you could feast on her wetness all night, it was time to take your prize - to show Dahyun how badly you really wanted her.

“Do you believe me now, when I say I want you?” you whispered while standing up in front of her and lowering your pants. You tossed off your shirt and placed your hands on her ass while she grabbed your shoulders.

She nodded with her face, still bright red, scrunched up in desperation. Despite being unable to vocalize it, she couldn’t wait. She needed you. It wasn’t until you stepped a bit closer and grabbed the back of her thighs did she finally come to terms with what was about to happen - you lifted her up from the legs with her back against the wall.

Her slick pussy was beckoning to you, begging for you, even as you held your cock right up against it you could feel the heat emanating from it. Teasing was not an option right now, not that you could even if you wanted to. You pressed forward, pushing your hips into her body, receiving another one of Dahyun’s painfully sexy moans directly into your ear. You kissed her neck, a final act of tenderness before what was to come.

Moans and gasps became one as you stretched her pussy out. Her body was calling to you in desperation, the wetness and warmth of her inner walls cradled your shaft as you pushed to the base. Part of you wanted to just go at it, have your way with her pussy, but your body had other plans. Slowly, methodically, your hips moved back and forth, stretching her pussy to the limit with each thrust.

It was slow, but not gentle. Each pump of your hips had force, making Dahyun recoil against your body. Her soft tits squishing against your chest. Pleasure reverberated through her body with each heavy thrust. She took a sharp breath each time your cock slammed into her, the sound of her audible satisfaction right next to your ear.

She was getting considerably wetter, evident from the puddle forming between your feet. Gently, you spread her ass cheeks a bit with your hands, her soft body easily moving. Now, every time you thrusted into her, even more of her juices sprayed down onto the rooftop.

Finally, her pussy began to convulse around your cock. You didn’t speak up nor slow down, you simply continued jamming your body as deep as it would go into her, using as much force as you could muster while holding her up. She was losing strength in her own grip, her fingers no longer digging into your skin.

As she slowly slid down towards the ground, you fell forward with her, keeping your cock embedded balls deep as her inner walls sent waves of pressure along your shaft. Her moans became muted briefly - she was unable to make sound.

Keeping your cock deep inside her, you slowly moved back and forth just a tiny bit - easing her into extending her orgasm. The warm contractions continued to engulf your cock, you had to slow down just a bit in hopes to delay your own orgasm.

“That was amazing,” she moaned softly, her body completely out of energy in front of you.

“You’re amazing,” you whispered, leaning forward and kissing her mouth. You kissed her mouth a few more times, when a sudden urge hit you like a truck.

After pulling out of her wetness, you stood up in front of her. She looked up at you, her tits bouncing up and down with each breath she took. Stepping over her, your legs on either side of her little body, you grabbed the back of her head.

There was zero resistance, she let you take control of her: she let you use her. Once you leaned forward a bit, she even opened up her mouth wide - it seemed like she was just as excited for you to enter her throat as you were.

Slowly, you inched forward into her mouth until there was resistance. Then you pushed through, past the barrier. Noises began to emanate from her mouth, her saliva dripped down her chin onto her chest, her legs bent at the knees and came up towards her chest, her hands gripped onto your legs. You paused for a second, staring down at her with her eyes shut tight.

Part of you wanted to stop, part of you wanted to see how far she would let you go. Your uncertainty was erased when she tried to move her head forward - she wanted you to push the limit. You tightened your grip on her head, bunching her hair up with your fingers, and pressed forward until your entire shaft entered her warm mouth. After holding yourself inside her for a few seconds, you swiftly withdrew from her lips, leaving her coughing.

“You alright?” you asked while gently rubbing the back of her head.

She looked up at you with her eyes watering just a tiny bit and nodded, wiping the shiny mess off her chin with the back of her hand.

“Please keep going,” she whispered to you.

The way she spoke made her sound so desperate. Begging, yearning for your attention. She didn’t care how tough it was, she only cared that you were focused on her. In a strange way, seeing how badly she wanted you made you lust for her even more - it seemed her plan was working.

Hurting her was not your goal, it was the last thing you wanted to do. So as you stepped up in front of her face again, you were gentle. Lovingly, you slipped into her mouth again. Despite knowing she was fine with you grabbing her head and ruthlessly throat-fucking her, you took far more care.

Immediately, her warmth brought you back to that state of pleasure. There was no urge to push past her limit, but you did make sure to get there each time your hips moved. You wanted her to know that she was appreciated while still making her feel safe.

With your hands on the ledge, holding yourself up, you looked out into the night and continued pumping your hips. The warmth of her mouth felt unbelievably amazing on your cock, especially in the cool night. Her mouth was comforting, a place you didn’t want to leave. You kept your hips moving, not jamming yourself into her throat, but pushing her to take a good majority of your length each time.

Slowly, sensually, you took pleasure in her mouth. She was, involuntarily or not, allowing her saliva to make a mess all over your cock. Her wetness left a hefty layer along your length, making it incredibly easy to pump into her soft lips.

The pressure was building up, and you could feel yourself getting close. It was becoming difficult to maintain your slow and steady pace. There was a desire in you to unleash, to thrust your cock as deep into Dahyun’s little throat as you could.

After pushing yourself back slightly with your arms, you looked down at the pale girl. She was so diligent, never once complaining about having her mouth invaded. She took it well - like a professional. You placed one hand on her head again, and pressed deep into her throat one last time before slowly pulling out of her lips.

“Keep going if you want to,” she gasped for air while looking up at you, her chin completely drenched in saliva. She reached up with one hand and wrapped her small fingers around your cock, slowly stroking. “Cum in my throat, on my face, do whatever you want with me.”

“You’re already giving me everything I could ever want,” you replied warmly while leaning down to grab her hands and lifting her up. You turned her around so that she could also see the river below being illuminated by the lights of the night. “Bend over,” you commanded the petite girl as she leaned against the barricade.

As she moved her hips back, your throbbing manhood naturally pressed up towards the sky. You pushed down, sliding your shaft between her ass cheeks. You slid up and down between her cheeks, enjoying the soft cushioning of her ass around your cock.

With one hand pushing down on your shaft, you slipped into her pussy again. Her lips spread with little resistance, a gentle moan escaping her lips as you pushed in. You wrapped your arms around her body, grabbing her tits as your hips started thrusting.

She kept her mouth open, softly moaning into the night each time you pressed against her backside. Just like you were with her mouth earlier, you were careful with her pussy. It wasn’t soft, but you weren’t willing to risk hurting her - she was too precious.

After fucking her from behind for a bit, her incessant moans filling the air, you took one step back. Your hands slid down her body and pulled her back from her hips, bending her over even more. She was so wet, that puddle between your feet from earlier was gigantic at this point.

It was time to finish, your cock was basically begging for it now. You placed your hands on top of hers, holding the barricade alongside her, and pushed your cock into her one more time. While your hips chased that not-so-distant climax, you bent over her back and started kissing her spine.

The slightly salty taste of her back filled your mouth as you neared your orgasm. Your hands squeezed hers gently, and her moans turned into gentle squeals. That warm pussy was driving you insane. Just as you were about to cum, you wrapped your arms around her core for support, holding yourself up with her body.

“Dahyun, fuck,” you cried into her back as your cock began to erupt inside her warm cavern.

Pump after pump you shot your load into her. Like the perfect girl she was, she held herself up, allowing her pussy to become a pocket for you to deposit your load into. The strength in your legs was disappearing, and this time you were the one sliding down to the ground while Dahyun followed.

After falling to the ground, you rolled over onto your back, staring up at the sky and heaving for air. With the little strength you had left, you turned your head to see Dahyun squatting next to you, a stream of white goo dripping out of her and adding to the messy puddle from earlier.

She then straddled your body, kissing you briefly, before rolling over to your other side where the ground was less soaked in your aftermath.

“It can be difficult, you know?”

“What is?” you asked, trying to control your panting.

“Seeing you with the others, I know that it’s your job, but it can still be difficult,” she sighed, holding her knees up to her chest.

After sitting up with your back against the barrier and snuggling up closer to her, you wrapped an arm around her shoulder. “I know, and I’m sorry things have to be this way,” you said softly. You silently vowed to give Dahyun some extra attention, cherishing what this girl meant to you. “Was that as good for you as it was for me, though?”

“It was,” she whispered, moving closer to you. Her body was shivering. “Thank you for looking out for me.”

“Always, I’ll always be looking out for you,” you replied, trying to transfer your body heat to her with your hug. “Never forget that.”

“I won’t,” she whispered softly, her teeth clattering. “Do you think there would ever be a world where we could start dating?”

“Of course, if it was announced that Dahyun from Twice wanted to start dating there would be a massive line,” you said softly while crawling forward and grabbing the blanket from earlier. “And I would be at the front of that line,” you added, wrapping the blanket around her.

“What if it was just Dahyun,” she asked quietly.

Your heart skipped a beat.

“Do you mean…”

“I don’t know,” she mumbled. “I’m worried, what if the others don’t?”

“We both know I’m not allowed to tell you about the others,” you answered solemnly. “I can only discuss what you’re going to decide.”

“I’ve already agreed to renew,” she said softly, squeezing your body under the blanket. “My only worry is if the others don’t. Without them, there is no Twice.”

“When I said I’ll always be looking out for you, I stand by that,” you said while squeezing her back. “Even if the nine of you decide to move on, I’ll be here for you.”

“That’s more comforting than you could ever know,” she yawned, the fatigue of her efforts today finally hitting. “But I’m not ready to move on, not yet.”

“Then, before you move on, maybe we need to explore this idea of us dating,” you suggested.

“I don’t know if that’s fair to Sana,” she said shyly. “The two of you aren’t exactly a secret.”

“Hey, I assure you Sana is fine with it if you are,” you responded. “Are you?”

“I think I’d be open to trying,” she said, her cheeks turning bright pink.

“In that case, let’s get you inside before you hurt yourself,” you chuckled. “It’s freezing up here.”

“It wasn’t so bad while you were fucking me,” she giggled.

---

A/N:

What can I say, I'm a Dahyun simp. Honestly this Birthday series was initially only going to be two chapters, but it's looking more like it'll be four. Le Sserafim... soon... sorry to keep everyone waiting! For Twice, there is soooooo much to come. After Birthday is done, I'd expect two cameo chapters and then MiSaMo focus!

As always, I am loving all the support from my readers! I can't believe how many people genuinely enjoy my writing. Someone even said I'm their favorite author... love you guys!

I do want to ask one thing. Of course follows/likes/whatever are cool, but I'd really love to hear feedback! I honestly care about feedback through comments, DMs, whatever, way more! Not only does it make me happy to hear what people think, it also helps me with my future plans.

Of course, if you don't want to send feedback, then you absolutely don't have to. Just keep reading and enjoying or whatever, or don't, live your life <3.

[jaeyuniism]

LESSONS IN LOVE | LEE HEESEUNG

pairing: basketballplayer!heeseung x f!oc

summary: in which Kim Eunhi meets heeseung, the annoyingly arrogant basketball player, when she's forced to become the school basketball team's manager.

warnings: sfw, no warnings just a fluffy enemies to lovers fic :p

— wc : 2k — did not proof read —

part 1/31

MY CHIN REST AGAINST THE BALL OF MY PALM IN INDIGNATION. Once again, the lunchroom was a chaotic mess of endless chatter and swarms of bodies communing together. Normally, this didn't bother me, but after what happened earlier, everything was a bother. 

"Eunhii~, are you still mad about what happened earlier?" Minju queries as she set her tin lunch plate on the table. I only groaned, throwing my head into my hands in utter defeat. This had to be my final straw.

"What happened with her?" Hanni teasingly asked poking at the left side of my ribs. My body jolted to the side as I looked up at her, my eyebrows furrowed and my lips smeared into a prominent frown. 

"Hanni, please-" Minju interrupted our awaiting argument with an awkward cough signaling us to turn our attention back to her. "Eunhi is having a bit of a hard time because she wasn't allowed to join the student council..." She explained picking up her long silver chopsticks.

I forcefully dropped my head for what felt like the thousandth time into my folded hands. "It's not just that, it's because of some stupid extracurricular activities or whatever." I grumbled into my arm.

"That's why you're sulking? Cheer up Eunhi, there's plenty of extracurriculars you could join to get the requirement done." Hanni offered rubbing my shoulder slightly. I only huffed, finally lifting my head to peer at the side of her face.

Her cute button nose twitched slightly and I knew exactly what was about to come next. "Just laugh at me, just freaking laugh at poor little 'ole me." I sulked hanging my head low. By now, the chocolate milk I had brought over from the vending machine sat to the side of me abandoned and unopened.

I couldn't be bothered to eat or even drink my favorite little beverage, all because of my tragic rejection. "You don't get it, it was so humiliating. All I wanted to do was make a good impression." I whined flipping my head in each direction.

Hanni swatted at my braids in annoyance. "Okay Eunhi, we get it." She quipped shooting me a stern look. I ignored her instead opting to dramatically drape the back of my hand against my forehead in feigned agony.

"Let's think about this logically, there's plenty of activities you can can take up. Don't be discouraged yet!" Minju softly smiled at me patting the crown of my head delicately. "And I'm sure you'd be great at any of them."

See, that sounded great and all but there was a bit of an issue. "The only available one is being the boys' basketball team manager." I spat out the words like it physically hurt to say. Because they did.

Hanni tried—emphasis on tried—to keep a straight face, but the second I uttered those God-forsaken words a laugh spilled out of her lips. I shot her a glare but that only made her laugh harder nearly choking on her kimbap. 

"You? A basketball manager? Y'know what, maybe being in student council isn't what's best for you." She gasped in between giggles. I groaned dropping my head into my hands once again. "You're making it worse."

"Okay, okay that's enough Hanni! People are looking at us.." Minju interrupted through clenched teeth. I only shook my head in recollection of the embarrassing encounter from earlier. All I've wanted to do since transferring here is to make a good impression, but now my life was definitely ruined.

"It's only the first month of school and my life is over." I childishly whined lifting my head.

"I mean– it can't be that bad..right? You can meet new people, it'll look good on your resume–"

"In case you forgot, this is the boy's basketball team," I interrupted. "You think I want to be around a bunch of sweaty egotistical athletes? They definitely won't listen to me, and I don't even like basketball."

"This is true.. But hey, didn't your brother play basketball?" Hanni wiped a tear from her eye before picking up her chopsticks again. "Yes, but that doesn't mean anything! I don't want to be the stupid basketball manager or whatever."

Minju looked at me with sympathetic eyes. If there was anyone who knew how much of a dilemma this was for me, it was her. I had gone on and on about my desire for a fresh start here being a transfer student, and my plans had already gone to crap.

Not to mention, the whole exchange was embarrassingly humiliating.

FLASHBACK...

I strode into the teacher's office with my head held high, application in hand, completely prepared to answer any questions and propose my candidacy for student council. I had even ensured getting my pronunciation down to a T just for this moment: my breakthrough!

All I could focus on was this moment, right now when my two years of hard work and perfect attendance would finally pay off in the form of membership in the student council. I had been so caught up in my presupposed victory, I almost didn't noticed the dark haired boy in uniform sitting right next to the empty seat reserved for me.

I barely got the words out before the teacher interrupted me. 

"Have a seat, Eunhi." The look on his face was far from welcoming or inviting as he adjusted his glasses solemnly reaching his hand out for my application– though it was obvious he had a copy of his own on the table.

"Eunhi," he started, voice way too serious. "I see you're interested in joining the student council."

I nodded enthusiastically, but I couldn't deny that my nerves were getting the best of me right now. "Yes sir." I blinked, sitting up straighter.

He hummed, glancing down at my neatly filled-out application. "Your grades are excellent. Your attendance is perfect. And your essay..." He paused, nodding approvingly. "Very well written."

A flicker of pride sparked in my chest. See? I was exactly the kind of student who deserved a spot on the council. A leader. A—

"But," Mr. Kim continued, and just like that, my pride evaporated.

I swallowed. "But?"

"You need an extracurricular to be in the student council. It's strictly noted in our handbook that we're looking for well-rounded students."

"Oh, but I–"

"Preferably students involved in athletics, it looks better." He noted dismissively as he continued to glance down at my papers on his desk. 

I opened my mouth, then closed it. This had to be a joke. I came all this way—worked hard, kept my grades up, did everything right—just to get shut down over sports?

"Uhm, okay I understand but would I still be able to apply for this term?"

He tilted his head, pondering for a moment. I remained hopeful, this was my only chance at a fresh new start, my fate was in his hands. "No. You're expected to already know the importance of extracurriculars before applying."

My mouth hung open in both disbelief and offense at his stern cut tone. Had he no compassion? 

And of course, because the universe hated me, someone else was in the room to witness my humiliation.

"Jungwon!" I blinked in confusion before realizing he was speaking to the boy next to me.

He sat comfortably in the chair beside me, arms crossed like he had all the time in the world, Yang Jungwon—the Jungwon, school prince, student council president, literal embodiment of effortless swag—was watching this all unfold with thinly veiled amusement.

Great. What a fantastic first impression.

I forced myself to keep my demeanor calm and unbothered. Maybe, if I pretended hard enough, he wasn't actually there and this humiliation wasn't happening to me.

"Sports aren't exactly my forte, I'm sure I can find another way to qualify," I offered carefully. "Maybe I can volunteer for—"

"The boys' basketball team needs a manager, don't they Mr. Yang?" Mr. Lee interrupted. "It's the perfect solution."

I stared at him, blinking, waiting for him to laugh. This had to be a joke.

But nothing came. He was serious.

Jungwon let out a soft chuckle beside me. I whipped my head toward him, narrowing my eyes, and he held up his hands in surrender, dimples on full display.

"Oh no, don't mind me," he said, clearly entertained. "I'm just enjoying the show."

I clenched my jaw.

Mr. Lee, oblivious to the obvious murderous tension in the air, scribbled something onto a form and slid it toward me.

"Report to practice today after school," he said.

And just like that, my fate was sealed.

Jungwon leaned back in his chair, watching me. "You and the basketball team," he mused. "That should be interesting."

I shot him a forced smile as I snatched the paper off the desk and stood up.

He grinned. "Good luck!"

I groaned internally, marching out of the office before I could say something that would get me in trouble.

END OF FLASHBACK..

"Yikes.. He did you dirty." Hanni whistled lowly.

I sarcastically smiled at her throwing up my hands in defeat. "And there's absolutely nothing I can do about it" I pouted.

Of course I wanted to make a good impression, but not if it meant fooling around alongside a bunch of wannabe lebron james players. 

"Well.." Minju muttered reaching for her drink. "At least it's only for a semester, right?" I groaned again, gently banging my forehead against the table in defeat. 

This is going to be a long semester.

"You're going to be okay, Alleia. You're beautiful, smart, courageous..did I mention smart?" I muttered to myself. It wasn't like I was scared to enter the obnoxiously loud gymnasium that was right in front of me. It was more like I have no desire to. 

I nod to myself shutting my eyes. It's just one semester. Only a couple of months, I mean what could go wrong? I slowly approached the double doors, the soles of my feet dragging behind me.

The gym was loud, full of sneakers squeaking against polished wood and the rhythmic thump of the ball hitting the floor. I stood awkwardly near the sidelines, gripping a clipboard like it was a life vest in open water.

To be honest, I had no idea what I was even supposed to do as a manager. Nobody had actually explained anything to me. They just handed me this clipboard and waved me toward the court.

I fidgeted around, shifting my weight from one leg to the other. I squinted my eyes scanning the players—tall, fast, intense. I recognized a few faces from around school, but one face stood out above the rest.

Lee Heeseung.

The star player. The ace. The golden boy.

And he was currently barreling straight toward me. 

Wait, he's coming straight toward me. Before I could react, something—someone—slammed into me at full speed.

I stumbled backward, barely catching myself before I hit the ground. The clipboard flew out of my hands and clattered onto the court, the sound echoing through the now silent gym.

Standing in front of me, slightly out of breath, was Heeseung.

He finally caught his breath, frowning, dark eyes narrowing at me like I was the one who just body-checked him.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, voice void of emotion.

I inhaled sharply and dramatically, fighting back the urge to snap at him. "I'm the new manager."

His frown deepened. He glanced at the clipboard that lay beside me, then back at me. "Since when?"

I crossed my arms. "Since...this morning?"

He scoffed. "Great."

He bent down, grabbed my clipboard, and handed it back to me.

"Just try not to get in the way next time."

That dismissive tone—like I was the problem—set something off in me. I snatched the clipboard from his hands, eyes narrowing.

"Maybe if you were paying attention, you wouldn't have run into me."

A few players let out low whistles, eyes darting between us like we were about to throw hands.

Heeseung tilted his head, lips twitching like he was amused.

"Oh?" His voice had a teasing edge now. "You think I wasn't paying attention?"

"I know you weren't." I squared my shoulders. "Y'know they say a good player should have better court awareness."

That got a reaction. A few players stifled laughter. Someone muttered, "Damn."

For a second, Heeseung just looked at me, eyes scanning my face like he was trying to figure me out. Then, instead of snapping back, his lips stretched into a smile.

Not a friendly smile. A challenging one.

"Welcome to the team, manager."

With that, he jogged back onto the court, leaving me gripping my clipboard with one thought running through my head:

What have I gotten myself into.

enhypen masterlist!

[tragedicna]

GET TO KNOW THE MUN.

what’s your phone wallpaper : it's an omniscient reader viewpoint piece of dokja walking into the galaxy because he's my baby boy and i love him so much .

last song you listened to : 你不是我，我不是我 by 余佳运 a song made for one of my favorite novels

currently reading : husky and his white cat shizun . omniscient reader's viewpoint , global examination

last movie : it might be The Grey Man or Extraction

last show : if anime counts , then Life Lessons with Uramichi Oniisan

what are you wearing right now : grey t-shirt and grey sweats

piercings / tattoos? : i only have my earlobes pierced , but been looking for a reason to get some more

glasses ? contacts? : glasses because i'm a blind bitch . . . ruined my eyesight by reading too much in the dark as a kid .

last thing you ate? : kimbap and apples . . . and coffee

favorite color(s) : red , blue , pink . . . very much pink . i'm in my PINK era right now .

do you have a crush right now? : does 2D characters count ??

favorite fictional character : kim dokja (orv) , you huo (qqgk) , barry allen (the flash) , altair ibn la ahad (assassin's creed) , al-haitham (genshin impact) , and so many more lmao don't judge meee

tagged by: stole it from the dash tagging: steal it

[malarign]

fake friends

(when you get ditched up by your friends)

contains: idolbf!Jay x fem!reader | genre: angst with hint of fluff | tw! reader has really bad friends, mention of food, kissing, jay is a sweetheart as always :(( | wc: 1,1k

reblogs, likes and comments are highly appreciated!!!

“Mr. Fashionista! Get your ass over here!” you called your lovely yet a little bit grumpy boyfriend over to your shared bedroom to help you complete your outfit. You heard soft stumping coming your way, and soon the door revealed Jay in his gray sweatpants and a black T-shirt.

“So first you’re leaving me on this cold winter day, and now you’re calling me names? Not nice Y/n,” he said sarcastically shaking his head.

“Don’t be dramatic. It’s not the first time after all,” you said. Before he could argue with that he received a sweet kiss on his cheek that left a faint pink mark caused by your lipgloss. “And it’s not like I’m gonna leave you for a long time. I don’t see them very often,” you said referring to your two and only friends here in Korea. Even though your Korean level was really good you had a big problem finding real friends with whom you could gossip, share secrets, and spend some sleepovers like other groups of friends. “I have only them,” you said turning to the mirror to fix your lipgloss that was slightly ruined.

“That’s not true,” Jay argued. “You have me, the guys.”

“Well, I’m not gonna have girly talks with you guys, am I?” You raised your eyebrow looking at him through a mirror reflection.

“Why not? You can talk to me about anything you want,” he answered pulling you closer by your waist.

You turned around smiling softly and wrapped your hands behind his neck, his hands still firmly placed on your waist. “I know. But I also know you would have enough of it after approximately 10 minutes.”

Not having the energy to fight back he sighed. “What do you need help with?”

After brainstorming on which jewelry would match the rest of your outfit Jay asked for the last time, hoping he could spend his day off with you. “What would have to happen in order for you to stay with me and finish that last season of The Crown?” he asked sitting behind you on the edge of a bed.

“Oh no! You’re not gonna bribe me with The Crown!” you said pointing at his chest pretending to be mad. “You know I don’t see them that often.”

“Yeah, maybe 'cause they keep on ditching you?”

Your expression dropped not believing what you just heard. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me! Love, please can’t you see? They’re leading you!” he argued raising his hands vaguely.

“They’re not! You don’t know them, do you?”

“I don’t need to know them to see how they treat you, Y/n.”

You scoffed at his words, not hearing how rational he sounded. Anytime you had plans with each other they either canceled them last minute, or talked mostly to each other almost completely ignoring your existence, yet you didn’t seem to acknowledge that.

“You know what. I don’t care. Let me decide if my friends treat me right or not,” you snapped and abruptly turned around to face yourself in the mirror, this time fixing your earrings.

Seeing how defensive you were, Jay sighed raising his hands in a surrendering manner, walked up to you, and kissed your temple, before leaving to make both of you some light lunch before you leave.

After calming yourself down from your small quarrel, you decided to check how to get to the coffee shop where you planned your meeting. You opened your messages to see that both of your friends texted you a while ago.

“Hi Y/nie sorry but I don’t think I’ll be able to come today :((“

“Me too :((“

Your heart dropped. You looked at your reflection. All those hours of you excitedly picking your clothes, thinking of the time you’ll spend with your friends came to waste.

“Sweetheart, do you prefer kimbap with some pork or tuna?” Jay’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts. Thanks to that you realised you started crying, your precisely done makeup completely ruined.

Thinking your silence meant you were still angry at him, Jay decided to pack you both. After cleaning up from preparing your meal he noticed your figure not in an outfit he’d seen you in before, but in a pair of shorts and his old sweater. Seeing your bare face and slightly puffed eyes, he decided not to say anything.

“Does your offer still stands?” you asked in a whisper, voice threatening to crack any moment.

“Of course, sweetheart.” Jay smiled gently. Hearing that, you nodded and sat on the couch pulling blanket over your legs. Soon Jay joined you placing freshly made kimbap on a coffee table in front of you. “Didn’t know which filling you wanted today so I made both with pork and tuna,” he spoke side-hugging you, making you nestle up to him.

“Thanks,” you answered simply, knowing if you said more you’ll end up crying right here and there. And you didn’t want to let him have this satisfaction.

While Jay was searching for the Netflix app on the TV you pulled your phone out of your pocket. Opening your Instagram your heart dropped once again, seeing the newest story from one of your friends. You stared at the picture of two girls smiling widely, drinking beverages from the cafe you were supposed to meet at. Not controlling your emotions anymore you let the tears flow down your cheeks, sobbing loudly.

Jay looked at you concerned. Then his eyes landed on your unlocked phone, the story still present on the screen. He snatched it away from you, placing it next to his other side. Cupping your face he spoke: “Sweetheart, please don’t…”

“You were right,” you interrupted him between your sobs. “You were right and I should have listened to you.” You hugged him tightly hiding your face in his chest. You felt his one hand softly patting your head and the other one tracing small circles on your back.

“Y/n please look at me,” he said softly lifting her chin with his pointer finger. “You deserve the best friends out there. And those two… They don’t deserve you at all. Who’s the girl boss after all?” You couldn’t help but smile at his words, soon airy giggle leaving your mouth. “I love you, Y/n,” he whispered above your ear, words of confession you hear every day leaving you with goosebumps all over your skin.

“I love you more, Jay,” you replied tears still visible in the corners of your eyes, that this time contained nothing more but happiness and adoration for the boy in front of you.

“That’s impossible, sweetheart.”

thank you for reading! back to the masterlist

[weirdkpopgirl]

Mine | Jaemin Fic #1

Title: Mine

Genre: College AU, best friends to lovers

Word Count: ~3.5k

Warnings: mentions of reader being insecure, also tiny mentions her having a not-so-great childhood

Author's Note: Before, I tried to refrain from writing this trope because I thought it was a bit cliché. But I decided there was no harm in trying it. I think there are a lot of other writers who have done a better job than me. It was still fun to make this though. Hope you guys like my first longish story on here! Thank you for reading ^ - ^

∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘°∘♡∘

“(Y/n)-ah!” 

On cue, your eyes lifted from the textbooks in front of you and found a familiar face. You acknowledged the caramel brown-haired man with a small smile. Pretending as if your heart didn’t flutter when he called your name.

Jaemin returned your smile with his adorable one and claimed the empty chair next to you. 

“What are you doing here?” You asked the boy, watching as he reached for his bag.

“I was at the convenience store and picked this up for you,” He quickly explained, placing a triangle kimbap in your hand. “I got the spicy crab one you like.”

A confused frown formed on your lips. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Knowing psychology major Lee (Y/n), you’ve been here since the morning on a Saturday. Which means you probably skipped breakfast and lunch,” Jaemin relayed. 

“Aish…how did you know?” You admitted quietly, as you unwrapped the plastic on the kimbap. It was crazy how he knew you so well.

You guessed that’s what happens when you’ve been best friends with a person for six years. Ever since you helped him from failing the math exam in the sixth grade, Na Jaemin stuck to you like glue. Throughout middle and high school, people wouldn’t see you two without the other.

He looked at you like a proud mom when you took the first bite. “I just know you.”

You held his gaze for a second too long, cursing at yourself for blushing. Usually, the two of you were super casual with each other. In those small moments of sincerity, you felt like a million butterflies fluttered in your stomach.

It seemed that with years of friendship came blossoming feelings. You knew how stupid and cliché you were, being secretly in love with your best friend. But how could you not fall for him?

Na Jaemin was perhaps the only person who knew you the best. He knew all the things you liked and hated. He knew about your tendency to crack under pressure and the constant anxiety that ruled your mind. And he knew what cheered you up during those times, whether it was reassuring words or a warm hug from your best friend.

Jaemin…saw you in your worst moments. Maybe that’s why you fell for him. You realized it in ninth grade when your mom left the house and Jaemin was immediately at your side. He stayed the whole night, wiping away your tears and repeatedly telling you it wasn’t your fault. 

But no matter how strong your feelings grew, you suppressed them to the best of your ability. You decided a long time ago that Jaemin probably didn’t feel the same way. You knew because you watched him date multiple girls in high school. Though they were short-lived like any high school relationship, he never failed to capture the heart of any girl with a charming face like his. Besides, you treasured your friendship more than some confession that could easily ruin what you already had. At least this way, he was still a part of your life and you were a part of his.

Your thoughts were interrupted by loud chatter from a group entering the study area. You didn’t even need to look to know who the six boys were. After entering high school, Jaemin made a lot of friends. Even though they could be annoying with how much bickering they did, they were a nice group of guys.

Mark was a super senior majoring in business. Renjun, Haechan, and Jeno were third-year students, just like you and Jaemin. Then there was Chenle who was a sophomore and you recently met Jisung who was a freshman.

“Ugh, how long have you been here?” Haechan groaned at the sight of the textbooks and notes laid in front of you.

You sent the boy a glare. “I have a 15-page research paper due by the end of the week. Time can’t be wasted.”

“Sheesh. Being a psychology major sounds scary,” Jeno shuddered. 

You rolled your eyes and took another bite of your kimbap. Though you didn’t want to admit it, eating felt pretty nice after pulling two all-nighters and skipping meals. You were almost thankful when the attention of the group shifted to the boy next to you.

“Hey, I heard a certain someone might like you,” Mark nudged him on the shoulder.

News to him, Jaemin cocked a brow. “Really? Who?”

“Song Hyejin,” Renjun answered. “Contemporary dance major.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure we share a class,” Jisung nodded. 

Chenle beside him, pulled out his phone to show Jaemin a picture of her. “You know her, right?”

You peeked over at the younger’s phone. Song Hyejin…you’ve passed by her in the halls a few times. Despite being only a freshman, she quickly became popular among the guys. What was there not to like about her? She had beautifully styled hair, wore the best outfits, and had the prettiest makeup. She was sweet, talented, and surely had a whole future ahead of her.

“She’s cute I guess,” Jaemin shrugged in response. 

Haechan playfully smacked him on the shoulder. “Just cute? She’s a total goddess.”

A piece of you deflated at this. Insecurity was another reason Jaemin and you could never happen. There was no way that he would like you when he could have any other girl in the world. Despite how close you were, you knew that Na Jaemin was out of your league.

 ✰ ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ―・ 

That evening, you could barely concentrate on your assignments. Your mind kept wandering back to what the guys were talking about earlier. You wondered if Jaemin was going to date Hyejin. They’d surely be a popular campus couple if they did. Jaemin was already known for his handsome visuals and charming personality. 

“You’ve been staring at your computer screen for the past seven minutes.” 

Snapping out of your thoughts, you glanced over to your roommate, Young-Mi who was on her bed scrolling through social media. As the one other person who went to high school with you, she had been there to witness your hopeless crush on Jaemin.

“Oh, I didn’t realize,” You muttered and closed your laptop for the night. Your work was pretty much finished anyway.

Young-Mi sat up and stretched her arms. “Are you doing anything next Monday?”

“No, why?”

“There’s a guy in my programming class. His name is Yangyang,” Your friend spoke casually. “He’s in the same year as us, and I think you guys would get along.”

You sighed already knowing where this was going. “I’m not interested.”

“Oh come on,” Young-Mi whined. “Are you going to be hung up on Na Jaemin forever?”

You turned around, suddenly feeling defensive. “What—no! It’s just…I don’t want to date anyone right now.”

“That’s the thing, you never want to date anyone,” Young-Mi huffed in frustration. “I’ve watched you turn down a bunch of guys in high school and you still do it. All because of him!”

“It’s not that big of a deal, Young-Mi-yah.”

But the girl persisted. “I’m sorry to break it to you (Y/n)-ah. But he clearly hasn’t shown any interest in you over the years, and he probably never will.”

Your nails dug into the fabric of your leggings. The truth hurt a lot more said out loud. 

“Come to your senses, Lee (Y/n). It’s time to move on.”

The thought of it felt like someone was stealing your breath. You’ve been stuck in this one-sided love for far too long now. No matter how you tried, you couldn’t seem to get over him. But Young-Mi was right, you were never going to get anywhere with this.

“I’ll think about it,” You mumbled before leaving to go wash up for the night.

 ✰ ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ―・ 

Jaemin heaved a small sigh as he gave Hyejin a polite smile when she waved to him. Before she could approach him, he quickly passed by. She had asked him to have lunch with her the other day, and he couldn’t exactly say no. After that one time, he was more careful to leave first before she could get to him.

“You dodged that one pretty fast.” Jeno walked up beside him. “You’re really not interested in her, huh?”

Jaemin chuckled, “Hyejin is nice. But…”

“You still have feelings for (Y/n)?” 

Jeno didn’t even need to ask. He was the only one in the friend group who knew about the boy’s “unrequited” love for you. Solely because Jeno said it was so “obvious,” and that the others were fools to not notice.

“Yeah…” Jaemin nodded sadly.

The truth was, Jaemin has been in love with you since that time you helped him out in middle school. You were always the better student and took it upon yourself to tutor him in whatever subject he was struggling in. Even though you acted like you didn’t care about others, Jaemin knew you were a kindhearted person.

“Don’t you think it’s about time you let her know?”

“It’s not that easy.” The boy stuffed his hands in the pockets of his jacket.

The other truth was that Jaemin was afraid, always has been. Perhaps, you were the most precious person to him. He didn’t want to start something with you, only for it to not work out and make things awkward between the two of you. Being your best friend at the most, was the safest place for him to be at.

“If (Y/n) knows my true feelings, I could lose her,” He stated. 

Jeno sighed and swung his arm around his friend. “Well, I think there’s a high chance she likes you back. And who knows, maybe you guys are soulmates or something.”

Jaemin laughed and parted ways from Jeno before heading to the cafeteria. A smile crept on his lips when he saw you eating some yukgaejang. He was getting worried because you haven’t been coming to lunch lately. You were always the type to prioritize academics over your health.

“Whatcha looking at?” He asked as he sat down.

You glanced up from your phone. “Young-Mi is trying to set me up on a blind date.”

“With who?”

He crossed his arms and looked over your shoulder at the Instagram profile you pulled up. Jaemin instantly didn’t like the idea of this.

“Eh, I’ve seen better-looking guys,” He muttered, before shoving rice into his mouth. You couldn’t quite read his expression. “Are you…”

“I don’t know. Maybe,” You shrugged. “It’s not like I have any plans.”

Jaemin didn’t like what he heard. While he’s had some experience, you have never dated anyone before. Your priority of school and getting a job after college was the excuse you used. He wondered what changed your mind all of a sudden.

“Do you have a problem with that?” You tilted your head, noticing the frown he was wearing.

Jaemin met your curious eyes and quickly shook his head. “N—no. You can do whatever.”

Your shoulders dropped. “Oh…okay.”

He internally cursed at himself for saying that. The thought of you going out with some other guy didn’t sit well with him. But you were your own person who was perfectly capable of making your own decisions. Who was he to stop you?

✰ ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ―・ 

On your visit home during the weekend, you had stationed yourself in the kitchen for the whole afternoon. Just as you were popping the metal pan out of the oven, your older brother, Taeyong strolled in.

His eyes immediately enlarged with interest. “You made brownies?”

“Yeah, I was just in the mood I guess,” You said, grabbing the glass of water you got earlier. “Jaemin likes sweet things you know.”

“Oh, are you guys finally a thing now?” Taeyong asked. He sat at the counter and reached for one of your chocolate treats. His actions earned a light slap on the hand with your oven mitt.

“Wait until they cool,” You lightly scolded, pretending to ignore the amused expression on his face. “And no we aren’t.”

“Huh, I thought you would be by now.” He rested his chin on his hand innocently. “Jaemin hasn’t confessed yet?”

His sudden question threw you into a fit of coughs from choking on your water. Your lovely brother shook with laughter.

“What are you talking about? He doesn’t like me like that.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure. Have you ever seen the way he looks at you?”

You laughed at his ridiculous question. This was just another way of Taeyong trying to tease you.

He stood up from his seat. “Just think about it. Maybe you’ve been too focused on your feelings that you never picked up on them.”

Then yet again, your brain was left in a jumbled mess. When you think about it, maybe Jaemin dropped some hints here and there. But with his naturally flirty personality, you didn’t think he treated you any differently than other girls. Though there was always this sincerity in his words and a softness in his eyes.

You shook your head. Remembering what Young-Mi said a while back, you needed to stop these fantasies. Then again, if your own brother thought the opposite, maybe you were missing something.

 ✰ ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ― ―・ 

You fumbled with the paper blue bag in your hands, as you walked toward the lecture room Jaemin was in. His Monday class always ended at 1:30 p.m. Yours ended an hour earlier, and that’s when you’d usually be in the library or study space. But you had the brownies you planned to give to him.

Jaemin often begged you for treats whenever you made them. And of course, the boy didn’t seem to leave your mind. Despite the amount of effort you put into getting over him, you just couldn’t help yourself.

Just as you spotted him standing outside the classroom door, there was another figure in front of him. One with beautifully styled hair and a designer dress you could never afford. You couldn’t compete with your round-shaped glasses, stick-straight hair, and the plain black turtleneck you often wore.

You didn’t even have to take a step forward to overhear the conversation.

“I apologize for my forwardness but…I like you, Sunbae,” She spoke shyly, bouncing on the tip of her toes. “After talking with you, I think we’re pretty compatible. Let’s date!”

It only took the tiniest of smiles to crack on Jaemin’s face for your stomach to churn. You turned in the other direction, walking as fast as possible so you couldn’t hear his response.

“You’re such an idiot, Lee (Y/n)!” You blinked away the tears that already began to form.

You didn’t understand why you were getting so emotional. Surely this wasn’t the first time you witnessed your best friend enter a new relationship. Of course, it hurt to see him with another girl. Back then you pretended to be okay because you didn’t want Jaemin to worry. 

Maybe because it was Song Hyejin, someone you could never be. And now she’d have someone you could never have.

“Hey (Y/n), I was just about to text you!” Young-Mi exclaimed when she saw you were outside.

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. “Eo, what is it?”

“Do you still want to meet the guy?” She asked with a slight pout. “I really think you should give it a shot.”

Young-Mi held up her phone with his contact information displayed. You stared at the screen, thinking back to what you saw earlier. Perhaps it was the refreshing heartache that prompted you to accept her offer without too much consideration.

As much as it broke you, it was time to give up your hopeless crush on Na Jaemin.

 ―・ 

“Wah, you really turned her down Hyung?” Jisung asked with a hand over his mouth.

Jaemin nodded to the younger and glanced over to Jeno who had a discreet smile on his face. While his other friends seemed to be confused by Jaemin’s actions, he was rather proud.

~ ~ ~

“I like you Sunbae. Let’s date!” Her eyes sparkled when she spoke to him. 

The polite smile he put on was almost instinctual. The one he always wore when a girl confessed to him. 

“I’m sorry Hyejin-ssi, but there’s already someone I like.” He lowered his gaze. “So I’m afraid I can’t accept your feelings.”

~ ~ ~

The slightly offended expression on her face was still clear in Jaemin’s head. She probably wasn’t used to rejection. Before, Jaemin thought he could get over you if he said yes to those other girls. But he could never fully give his heart away with you lingering in his thoughts.

This time, he decided that he needed to stop making a fool out of himself.

“Anyway, who wants to get samgyeopsal tonight?” Haechan decided to redirect the conversation. Easily persuaded, the guys were already agreeing.

“We should text (Y/n) to see if she wants to come,” Jeno mentioned, giving Jaemin a side glance.

“I think she’s going on a blind date today,” said Renjun.

Jaemin sat up. “What?! Tonight?” 

“Yeah, you know Liu Yangyang? I’m pretty sure that’s who she’s meeting.”

“Oh him? He’s pretty cool,” Chenle nodded with approval. 

Their words became a blur to Jaemin. He remembered you talking about this last week, not thinking you’d actually go through with it. 

“I have to go,” was all he said before standing up to leave. The guys called out to him, but he ignored them. 

He ran out of the commons area and stopped at the front of your dorm building. That was when he saw you looking at him with a slightly concerned expression.

“Jaemin-ah, what are you doing here?”

Grasping onto his knees as he caught his breath, he stopped to look at you. To him, you always dressed nicely. But today you were wearing a cute plaid dress over a white top, and you even put on a little makeup. 

“Don’t—go—on—that date,” He panted, pressing a hand to his chest. His lungs felt like they were about to burst.

You frowned, wondering how he found out so fast. Was that the reason he came here?

“Why?” You found yourself asking. Why did he care if you were going on a date or not? 

His eyes met yours and they held that unreadable gaze again. 

“Because you’re mine.” He said breathlessly.

Then just as you started to process that sentence, he cupped your face and crashed his lips onto yours. Your eyes were wide open from the initial shock. But he didn’t show any sign he was about to pull away anytime soon. And slowly you closed your eyes and let yourself melt into the kiss.

When he did pull away, you were left in a blubbering mess. A million thoughts were racing through your head.

“I—don’t understand. I thought you and Hyejin…?”

“I rejected her,” Jaemin answered plainly. You removed his hands from your neck, trying to make sense of this news.

“But why? I mean, she’s so pretty and smart. She has so much more to offer.”

“I was afraid before. But you’re the only girl I want to be with,” He interjected. “I’ve always liked you, Lee (Y/n). I’m sorry it took so long for me to tell you that.”

You were left speechless for the next few moments. With your heart beating faster and hot cheeks, you could almost explode. The one person you’ve spent half your life admiring was here in front of you, admitting his feelings. This had to be a dream, right?

“Na Jaemin, you better not be playing with me,” You warned.

He looked so serious, you were almost intimidated. Then his arm snaked around your waist and he whispered. “Should I kiss you again to prove I’m not kidding?”

Jaemin took the flustered silence from you as a yes. You could feel him smiling into the second kiss, unable to contain the joy of knowing he finally had you. 

***

“When did you start liking me?” You asked out of curiosity.

His response was quick. “Since the day we met. What about you?”

“Oh…I think it was at the end of middle school?” You tilted your head, thinking back to it all. “Wah, I can’t believe it took so long for us to confess.”

“Yeah, we were silly weren’t we?”

You smiled and linked arms with him. “Well, we’re together now and that’s what matters.”

“You’re right, love,” He smiled back and leaned in to peck you on the lips. 

Your little moment came to an end with Haechan’s fake gagging.

“Gosh, they haven’t even been dating for 24 hours and they’re already one of those disgustingly sweet couples.”

“It took them long enough,” Jeno added.

Of course, the guys were happy to see their friends get together. Jaemin was too. No longer would he let his or your fears come in between the two of you. Though there was no way of telling what your future would be like, Jaemin fully intended on making you happy for the rest of his life.

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[kimbap-r0ll]

Hi kimbap! I have this request! Imagine Chrollo is on a date with reader. But suddenly, that guy who's been begging for a fight called Hisoka appears and ruins the mood. This takes place while they're playing hide and seek. Reader is fully aware of the whole ordeal beforehand and is pretty pissed because their date got ruined. The date that almost never happens because Chrollo was never around.

Thank yaaa💕

Hm, not too sure what to do with this but I have an idea. Idk if it's a sweet idea but it exists nonetheless. It's a short scenario

Reader and Chrollo's date gets ruined by Hisoka

You were likely with Chrollo on a stroll in some abandoned grounds of a long forgotten temple when suddenly Chrollo said that the two of you should split up to look for something. It was a weird request, but you listened nonetheless

Perhaps this was a mistake, because the moment you two split up Chrollo just dashed away. It felt a little offensive because of how fast he ran off, but you also had a sense that something was following the two of you.

You're question was answered when a card came flying in your direction, almost slitting your throat. You ducked out of the way, almost falling over at the sudden push your leg made to move away from wherever the card flew from

"Oh, I didn't expect to see you here," you recognize that voice. It was the one that Chrollo was being sought out by, the one that betrayed the spiders.

"Hisoka," you murmured, looking up slowly to meet the magician's gaze. He was shuffling some cards around as he walked closer to you. Quickly you stood up, taking a defensive stance

"Oh please, I'm not here to fight you, rather, I need your help to find my date," Hisoka said

"You mean my date?" You snap, he smiled back at you, clearly amused by your anger. He knew that you were as angry at him as the rest of the troupe. It was because of him that Pakunoda died after all.

"No worries, we can have a date with three people, yes? Now, then, where did he run to?" He answered you, clearly not concerned with you. With a quick burst of nen you dashed towards him to at least get a punch on him, however he swung his leg into your stomach, causing you to stop

You fell on your knees, trying to gasp for air because of the kick but he tried to hit you with a card again. "You know, if I present your dead body to Chrollo, would that make him more willing to accept my invitation?"

"I'm not going to entertain that," you glare at him, but he still has that casual smile on his lips. Oh he was going to pay for ruining the day

[bidokja]

shj: *is a sopping wet emotionally tangled mess after finding out for sure that his weird memory deja vu stuff wasnt all in his head and yoojin not only has smth to do with it but rubbed it in his face, stranded who knows where after having his birthday party ruined By His Own Self cause he got angy and sunk a fucking yacht. he is one of the most powerful men in the world and is having to eat. convenience store kimbap. on his birthday.*

me: oh this is the best thing that's ever happened to me

shj: *immediately endears himself to me by having such a shit day and then. having to read. the directions. to learn how to open. the kimbap. while still soaking wet. on his birthday. did i mention he is one of the strongest men on the planet. and he has to do this. my heart is a traitorous little bastard.*

me, tearing up: oh this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me

shj: *proceeds to open it Perfectly on his first try*

me, eyes suddenly as dry as a desert: nevermind. also, fuck you

[bts-reveries]

young one | finale

(images at the end)

“Wakey wakey,” Jungkook says, about an inch away from your face. You slowly open your eyes, leaning in to give him a peck on the lips.

“Morning,” you mumbled, Jungkook scrunches his nose and pulls away, standing above you.

“You know, I was going to make this morning perfect since it’s our first day dropping off Sian at school together, as an ~engaged~ couple, and our first day of work… but you ruined it with that morning breath of yours,” he says, pinching his nose and closing his eyes. Dramatic much?

“I love you too,” you say sarcastically, ripping the duvet off of your body. “Did you make breakfast?” You say, sniffing the air. “It smells like… burnt pancakes.” He tilts his head at you and suddenly his eyes grow wide. 

“S-SIAN,” he yells, running out of your room and to the kitchen. “I TOLD YOU TO WATCH IT.” You hear him yell.

“I DID!” You hear your son yell back.

“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME IT WAS BURNING?” Jungkook yells back.

“YOU JUST SAID TO WATCH IT.” You stay there, at the edge of your bed, laughing at their conversation.

“BABE,” Jungkook yells from the kitchen, “THERE’S ONE GOOD PANCAKE. DO YOU WANT IT?” You shake your head, standing up and walking to where your boys were at. 

“No it’s okay, you guys can share it,” you say, sitting with Sian at the counter. 

“Rock, paper, scissors?” Sian says, smirking at his dad. Jungkook squints his eyes at him, quirking up an eyebrow. 

“RockpaperscissorssHOOT,” Jungkook mumbles quickly, shooting up ‘scissors’. Sian laughs as he holds up ‘rock’.

“Thank youu~” your son says, taking the pancake from Jungkook. 

“Ah.. that’s my boy,” you say, petting your son’s head. You look up at Jungkook and see him pouting. 

“Go ahead and get ready,” you tell him. “I’ll make more pancakes.” Jungkook’s face lights up immediately.

“Ugh YES, best wifey ever!” He yells with joy, running around to give you a kiss on the cheek. “I’ll pay you back with something special later,” he whispers in your ear, flashing you with a little wink.

-

“Who’s picking me up later?” Sian asks you two as you and Jungkook stand in front of him by his classroom door. 

“Both of us,” Jungkook answers. Sian’s face lights.

“You and Mommy?!” he yells.

“Yeah of course,” you say. “Since mommy works with Auntie Sohyun now and daddy works with Uncle Jin, we’re able to take enough time off to spend with you together.” 

“But mommy what about your college?” Sian asks you, concerned about your own education. You let out a small laugh as you thought it was cute that he knew and cared about that.

“Remember when we went to live with grandma and grandpa? I did school at home right?” Sian nods. “Well I’m still doing that, so I’m doing online schooling.”

“YAY! We get to be together all the time!” Sian yells, raising his arms. You laugh, pulling him into a hug.

“We do. But for now, you’re going to class and we’re going to work,” you say. Jungkook kneels down to give him a hug next. 

“Love you buddy, we’ll see you in a few hours okay?”

“Okay!”

-

You and Jungkook had an hour to spare before you had to start your first shift and before Jungkook had to meet up with Jin at his building. The two of you decided to stop by the convenient store to kill some time, and buy some snacks. 

It was pretty cold out. You two had your hands in your pockets, but Jungkook didn’t let go of your hand and held your right hand in his pocket instead. He’s been super clingy lately. 

You liked it. 

“Is that Sungjae?” you ask. The two of you were walking to the front of the store when you saw Sungjae sitting on the tables at the front, drinking. “It’s seven in the morning..” you whisper to Jungkook. 

Jungkook lets go of your hand and walked up to his old friend.

“Hey.. are you okay?” he asks. Sungjae, still holding onto his drink, turns and looks up to Jungkook. He laughs.

“Did you come here to rub it in my face?” he responds. You frown, standing behind Jungkook. 

“No, we came here to buy snacks..” you say quietly.

“Well you were wrong about everything. A kid may change your life but I doubt it’s for the better,” he says, taking a big swig of his drink. You frown, you were confused. You turn to Jungkook to see if he knew what Sungjae was talking about and you watch his face turn from confused to a big smile. 

“You and Yuri?” Jungkook says. “I would have never seen that coming.” 

“What?” You ask, turning to Jungkook. 

“Yuri is pregnant,” he says. Your eyes grow wide.

“Shut up.”

Sungjae rolls his eyes. “Go ahead and rub it in my face--”

“Oh.. um, Sungjae,” you say, “I know how you all feel about me.. But just know.. That this sounds sucky right now because it wasn’t in your plan, but it’s going to be the best thing eve--”

“Shut up,” he groans. Your eyes widen in surprise. “I don’t want to hear all that dramatic stuff okay? It’s my life, don’t butt in.”

Your face drops and you turn away, Jungkook notices and he felt his face heating up.

“Look, Yn is just trying to help you feel better. We went through this too. You know that. You know, we’re willing to help you and Yuri start out if you need it just like how our friends helped us,” Jungkook tells him. “But if you’re going to despise my family no matter what, we won’t bother you again. My family does nothing to make you hate them but you continue to hurt them with your words and push them away without a second thought.” Jungkook sighs, taking his hand out of his pocket to grab yours. “Maybe this baby will give you the love you’re clearly lacking. Good luck with your life.” Jungkook turns away to walk inside the store, dragging you behind him when Sungjae laughs.

“Before you think about mines, worry about yours,” he says. “Keep calling yourselves the perfect family. I don’t see a ring on her finger.” You smirk to yourself, taking your left hand out of your pocket and showing him your gorgeous ring. Sungjae furrows his brows at the sight of your diamond.

“Don’t expect a wedding invitation,” you say, making Jungkook laugh as you two finally make your way into the store.

-

“So Yuri and Sungjae huh,” you say, before biting into your kimbap. “Would have never seen that coming.” Jungkook nods, chewing on his. The two of you were in the car, in the bakery parking lot. There was still 15 minutes to spare.

“I didn’t either. But I could care less about them,” he says, taking another bite. You turn to him.

“So you’re really over them this time?” You ask, he nods. “What if we bump into them a few years from now?” Jungkook laughs.

“If I hit Yuri with my cart again, I’ll say ‘sorry ma’am I didn’t see you there’ and go about my way,” he answers. “They were good friends when we were younger, but I have to move on. If I want a good future for my family, I have to keep moving forward. I can’t do that with my friends that’s stuck in the past.” You smile at his answer.

“Wow, you sound… really mature.. It’s kind of weird,” you say, making Jungkook laugh.

“I have a son, a lovely fiancée, and I work for a big company now,” he answers. “I’m a big boy, I should act like one.”

“I like that,” you say, smiling up at him, “but I also like the child at heart Jungkook so don’t go changing too much.” 

“Hey I’m the same JK, just more responsible,” he says, with a little wink. He leans into you and you think he’s going in for a kiss, but he passes your lips and leans into your ear instead.

“Make sure you sneak out some cookies for me and Sian,” he whispers. You roll your eyes, pushing him away.

“Whatever Jeon, I don’t think your Yoongi hyung will like that,” you say. 

“Maybe he won’t, but I’m sure noona will be okay with it.”

You shake your head, smiling, this is really going to be the man you marry. 

young one

♛ finale ♛

pairings: photographer, dad!jungkook x hostess, mom!reader

a/n: the end keep a look out for jin’s masterlist that should be dropped soon! i’ll open up the taglist for that once it’s posted <3

taglist: @kookietsukkie @brinnalaine @chocobetterknot @silentlyimpractical @aianloveseven @jayhope88 @preciouschimine @noelitaaaa @butterflylion @yogugui @jikachoo @samros95 @yoongis-cumsock @strwberry-jam @sope-and-shine @cosmicdaylight @eatjeanjin @rjsmochii @i-swear-im-a-soft-stan @peoplejustcanthandlemywierdness @prdshobi @marmaribelarova @ramyagovindraj @casspirit0705 @ssyubb @smauslut @taexmichi @codeinebelle @cecedrake2217 @hellotherehoneybee @ddofa @winterwidow27 @ephyra1230 @heartfeltscribblings @nightapple4jk @applejuice5000 @salty-for-suga @lemonteacyst @princessjazzyjazz @bamboozled-jaykay @bigimpression @dammit-jjk @kookie-sun0097 @kookoo-kachoo @waddlebby @taekookcaneatme @jikooksgirl19 @tanumiki @strawberryforever25 @hobiismyhopeu

TAGLIST IS CLOSED!!

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[noelxbe]

beclaudine

claudine doesn’t allow herself to be confined to restrictions, she’s always ready to embrace a little more extra—everything has to be glamorous and over the top, dramatic in a luxurious fashion. and to her, that means cosplaying a character’s summer event outfit. of course she’d go the extra mile, wearing waterproof make-up and making sure every detail of her summer costume is perfect. there’s just one thing missing, a specific piece of jewelry. a bracelet, that’s supposed to go on her right hand. luckily, she commissioned the right man for the job: noel. her request had come a little late, although she made sure not to make noel rush too much—he’s a trainee after all and she knows they have crazy schedules—so she was totally fine with noel handing the accessory over during the event itself. which, is today. they agreed to met up at one of the snack booths, which is where she’s heading off to right now. blinking, she finally spots the man. she smiles, tapping the other on the shoulder. “hey! are you getting something? don’t worry, you can just hand me the bracelet after you eat. no rush!” she decides to scan the menu herself, just in case her stomach starts to fight with her and wants to be filled too.

last year noel’s sister had begged him to take her along to the waterbomb festival, noel didn’t want to though, and at last she went with some friends. this year he was joining the festival, one day with her, the rest alone, though he’d surprisingly spotted a lot of familiar faces. now that noel was a trainee and actually knew about kpop artists, it made sense for him to join the event, he could as last, sing along to the songs. he was mostly here to listen to music, partly though, he was here to look good.

he’d styled his hair (though likely the water would ruin that), he’d put on waterproof make up, and he’d worn a tight white shirt, while intending on getting wet. it’d been a while since noel had felt pretty, or well, he knew he was handsome, but it’d been a while since he’d put on an outfit where he intended to look good, lately comfort had been prioritized over looking good.

he was on a mission to feel and look good, but he also had stuff to do, like delivering a bracelet to his friend. his jewelry business generally hadn’t done as well since he became a trainee, since, he was even more busy when being a trainee came into his life, but school was done, so he figured he’d have more time for jewelry making soon. it was the first time in a while he’d gotten commissioned to do something personal, usually people just bought what he had on his website. 

he turns around as someone speaks to him, mouth full with a bite of kimbap. he swallows “hey claudine, ah you’re looking good!” he shows a smile, “are you hungry? i don’t mind buying you something”. “i got your bracelet, packed it into a bunch of stuff to make sure it wouldn’t break, it’s exciting to give my jewelry in person rather than just sending it with the mail”. “enjoying waterbomb so far?” he asks before stuffing his mouth with another bite of kimbap.

[bangchanshehe]

Are You Mine? pt.6

You arrived in Korea to start living your dream, or so you thought until you meet a man that woman dream of throwing themselves on. His entry into your new life takes you down a rocky path where friends will become enemies and foes will make themselves be known.

word count: 2k

The next day things had started without a hitch. You had gone to the company to get your official name badge and started to set up your office so it felt more like your own. You had organized a file on your computer for each other the boys in exo so that you could keep track of each boys schedule, progress with English lessons, and take notes.

The boys’ previous English instructor had sent you an email with references as to where each of the members were as far as studying and materials that you could use during lessons. You had smiled at your desktop and thought back to the day that Baekhyun had asked you to help him with English… if not for that day you wouldn’t be where you are now and you decided that you would thank him later.

But the more that you let yourself think about how he went through your phone and found you the more you started to feel a little uneasy. Had it had been any other person in the world you would have felt incredibly uncomfortable and maybe even unsafe. What had started off as unsolicited hitting on turned into him essentially stocking your information and then calling you to beg for help.

You immediately let out a deep breath and promised yourself that you would pocket all of those feelings and emotions. At the time sure you had some red flags but after getting to know Baekhyun you no longer had any alarms going off in your head. Plus if it weren’t for that unfortunate beginning to your friendship then you wouldn’t be where you are right now.

A knocking at the door caught your attention and you immediately called out for whoever was at the door to come in. you waited with a polite smile and when you saw the familiar long hair of johnny at your office door you smiled.

“hi” was all he said as he stood awkwardly by the door like a little schoolboy

“hey” you said back giving him a warm smile “watcha doing here?”

He took a seat in the chair directly in front of your desk and cleared his throat before he looked back up to you. You watched and waited for him to answer you or at least say something else, and as the seconds went by and the room was still silent you began to smile wider and wider.

“johnny?” you asked

“I’m sorry. I’m just-“ he smiled up at you and then looked down again “I’m just a little tired” he finally said

“what time did you get here this morning?” you asked him

“8am” he answered

You looked over at the clock on your computer monitor and you noticed that the time was only 12. Perhaps he got home late last night. Or maybe he was so tired that he couldn’t sleep.

“so I wanted to ask you if you would eat lunch with me today.” He said keeping a straight face. “I mean I figured that you may not know about the good places to eat around here yet or have any friends to eat with so I thought id take you somewhere” he said nervously explaining away

You chuckled and smiled at him as you asked him “you think I don’t have friends?”

Johnny’s eyes went wide and you knew that he felt a sense of panic since he had essentially called you a loner. And it wasn’t that he was wrong and you weren’t offended either, but you knew that he wasn’t in his right mind and you wanted to give him a little bit of hell.

“I didn’t mean it like that! I just mean that since you just got here-“ he yelled as he explained

“its okay…. Im just messing with you.” You said with a smile. You stood up and grabbed your purse and watched as johnny remained seated “come on… where are you gonna take me?” you asked

The practice room…. He took you to the practice room to eat with you. You looked around and let out a happy chuckle as you looked around the room that you had seen so many times on the internet and in dance practice videos. And while it wasn’t the place that you had really anticipated eating in you knew that it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be in the same place that so many of your favorite idols had been before.

“is it just you and I?” you asked him, confused as to why the room was so empty

“yeah” johnny said taking a look around until he saw something that caught his eye. He ran off towards a counter in the back corner of the room and grabbed a bag that had takeout inside. “everyone usually likes to go out and eat or they have other schedules and they eat on the way”

He sat down in the middle of the floor and he opened up the containers one by one. Kimchi fried rice, kimbap, rice cakes, and fishcakes were opened one by one and as you smelled the aroma of each dish your mouth began to water.

“I didn’t know what you liked so I ordered all of my favorites assuming that you must like at least one of them” johnny said as he pulled out chopsticks and separated them for you.

“so do you not have any more work for the day?” you asked him

Johnny looked up at you and gave you a small sad smile. “its not that I don’t have any more work for the day, I just don’t have any individual work to do. When the group comes back then ill have more practice” he stated with a confident tone, but with one look in his eyes you could see that he was affected by his lack of work.

“at least you have time for a life. I mean you get to eat peacefully and enjoy taking midday naps.” You said with a smile hoping that it would cheer him up.

“I guess” he said before he let out a soft sigh “it gets tough being alone though. And since I cant really go outside and just do whatever I want to do, I almost just kind of wish that I would be working more.” He confessed.

You had no idea what you could say to make johnny feel better. And If you could make him feel even a fraction of a bit better you would do so in a heart beat.

You had always known that the companies of idol groups tend to have favorites and display that unequal kindness quite unashamedly. But to hear how sad johnny was and see the look in his eyes, you had realized that there could be a lot more hurt than you had ever thought.

The two of you ate comfortably as you enjoyed the food that johnny had prepared. The two of you had made small jokes back and forth with one another and it felt good to feel the energy of the room switch from sad to lively.

“if you ever want to eat lunch with me just text me” you said holding your hand out for johnny’s phone

“really?” johnny asked with a smile. He immediately looked down at your hand and eyed it for a moment before he placed his hand in yours.

You laughed and shook his hand off “not your hand! Give me your phone weirdo!”

“oh” was all he said as he fished his phone out from his pocket and handed it over to you

You quickly put your phone number into his phone and then handed it back to him. He looked at the contact and then smiled to himself before placing it back into his back pocket.

The two of you had wrapped up your meal and you were about to leave the practice rooms when suddenly johnny had cleared his throat, making you turn around.

“soo” he said as he put his hand on the back of his neck out of nervousness “I just wanted to say thank you for having lunch with me and being so fun… I really like you. And it’s a shame that you’ve already got a boyfriend.”

You were speechless that johnny had just said that he liked you. It was something that you could never even imagine would happen in this lifetime… or well ever. And yet after two days of knowing each other he has already said that he likes you. Your heart was pounding out of your chest and you felt like you were the most successful fan ever. Not only did you get to work with your favorite idols but you also got to-

“did you just say boyfriend?!” you asked him confused

Johnny looked back at you perplexed and he nodded his head. You took a second to think if you had ever mentioned anything about dating anyone or even liking anyone and you kept coming up short.

“what boyfriend?” you asked him

Johnny gave you a strange look before he finally answered you “Baekhyun said that you already had a boyfriend.” He looked up at the ceiling as if he was wracking his brain and trying to remember something “someone who was also from the states… I think he said his name was corey.”

“cole” you said to clarify

“yeah cole!” johnny said snapping his finger and pointing at you in confirmation.

You scoffed and looked down at your shoes. You couldn’t believe that Baekhyun would lie about something like whether you were single or not. Why would he even lie to begin with?

You were starting to feel like who your impression of Baekhyun was, was only who he wanted you to see. and the more that you were talking with other people about events involving him, the more that you found lie after lie. This on top of the whole phone incident was starting to not sit well with you and you were starting to lose some of your good impressions of him. And while it hurt to feel like the excitement from the night previously was diminishing you figured that it would be for the best to not get yourself involved with him anymore.

“yo hyung!” johnny called out to someone behind you and it snapped you out of your thoughts “did’nt you say that Emily had a boyfriend?”

You immediately turned around to see Baekhyun who looked like a frozen deer in headlights. You stayed put in your spot and watched as he panicked as to what to do next. He continued to choke on his words and with a scoff you turned around to face johnny once more.

“no I don’t have a boyfriend” you clarified to johnny “Cole is just one of my friends”

“oh” johnny said nonchalantly “well then if you aren’t seeing anyone would you maybe like to go out sometime?” he asked with a shy smile

You would be lying if you said that you were excited. The fact that Baekhyun was here and was still acting so shady had completely ruined your mood.

You knew that dating within the company was definitely a no-no. and while it wasn’t a written rule per say it was definitely an unspoken one, because the idols available image was very important to their marketability. But in this moment you wanted Baekhyun to get the message to stay away from you loud and clear.

Without a second though you smiled up to johnny, giving him your best fake smile before answering “sure. Id love that”

You didn’t care if Baekhyun had felt bad about seeing you and johnny agree to a date. It had infuriated you that he was manipulating so many people and doing so many shady things. And hopefully now he would leave you alone.

[made-me-deep-blue]

high school au! poppy x bea - bea wants a kiss from poppy

based on this post by @somewillwin 

taglist: @poppy-sin-clair @uhh-the-green-thing @stanzoeywade

-

When Poppy Min Sinclair and Bea Hughes had started dating, both of them made a promise that they would not be seen with each other until they’ve reached their meeting point.

However, ever since that football incident a few months back, Poppy started worrying less about being seen with Bea, even taking pride in walking next to the female quarterback. Her head usually makes excuses in return to combat her ego, but whenever Poppy looks up at Bea next to her, hands tucked into the pockets of her jeans and looking forward with an unreadable expression, it lets Poppy’s heart rest in ease a little.

On this particular day though, Poppy could literally feel eyes on her as she and Bea walked through the campus towards their favourite spot in school; the large oak tree behind the football stadium. The cheerleading captain writhed nervously under the intent gazes of the student population.

“What’s wrong?” Bea asked. “You look...tense.”

Poppy’s face flushed pink. “N-Nothing,” she tightened her grip on her bag. “I just feel...uncomfortable.”

Bea’s eyes scanned the vicinity, and although there’s no one within sights, if this were an anime series, there would be literally gleaming eyes in the shadows of the unoccupied rooms. The quarterback hesitated as she reached her hand out, but still got the courage to grab the fair-skinned hand of her girlfriend.

“C’mon, let’s go before we become a shoujo manga ourselves.”

“H-Hey!”

Bea weaved through the hallways and different buildings with expertise, and Poppy only realised that they had slipped through parts of the school that were out of bounds to them when they had reached their spot within five minutes when it would usually take them longer if they took their usual route.

“What’re you waiting for?” Bea looked behind at Poppy and nodded over to the shade underneath the oak tree, raising the packed lunch in her hand. “Lunch’s gonna get cold.”

“Alright.”

With the absence of an audience, both of them started cosying up to each other. Poppy shared the kimbap that her family’s private chef had made for her, while Bea shared her mom’s homemade Mexican pinwheels. After their lunches were cleared, both of them looked into the distance at the main school building, sipping on their juice boxes (Bea’s mom had packed two juice boxes because she just knows her own daughter).

Bea turned her head slightly and admired Poppy’s side profile. Spending more time with her when I found out about her family really made her more radiant.

“Is there something on my face, Hughes?”

Now it was Bea’s turn to get flushed. But in frustration.

“N-Nothing! Nothing at all…” Bea’s words trailed off as she looked away.

Poppy looked at Bea quizically, pausing her drinking to try to get Bea to look her in the eyes. “You don’t get to hide anything from me, Bea. You remember what we promised that day, don’t you-”

Bea’s lips were on hers before she could even finish the last syllable of her sentence. 

The kiss was chaste, but it was something that Bea always cherished whenever they were alone together. The little moments they shared; when they were cramped in the janitor’s closet when Bea couldn’t wait for a moment alone, or when Poppy had attempted to corner Bea in the locker room because Bea had looked so hot when she had taken off her helmet to drench her hair with her water bottle. Bea cherished all of them.

The air between them felt charged, heard it crackle with energy before both of them visibly went red and pulled away instantly.

Poppy patted on her red, heated cheeks with surprise. “W-What was that for, you dummy?!”

“I-” It took all the mental capacity that Bea had left to sputter out what she wanted to say. “I just wanted to kiss you!”

While Bea sheepishly rubbed the back of her neck whilst looking the other way, sizzling, Poppy touched her lips. God, she’ll never get over the feeling of kissing that himbo of a quarterback whom she’s stupidly into.

“...you wore my favourite chapstick flavour.”

“Huh?”

Bea turned over and her eyes were still on the grass, bottom lip jutting out. “I said...you wore my favourite chapstick flavour.” The words slowly went silent towards the end.

Poppy’s face right at that moment could compete with the colour of cherries.

“W-Why did you have to state the obvious like that?!” She shoved Bea’s head away with her hand, squeezing her eyes shut.

“Because it’s true!” Bea retorted. “That means you remembered, Poppy.”

Poppy tried to look up at Bea. Her face was exactly as red, but her hazel brown eyes were gleaming. It definitely wasn’t the afternoon sun since they were under the shade, but it was a look of...commitment. The commitment to love the complex woman Poppy is. The commitment to be with Poppy no matter where she came from.

The commitment to love Poppy.

There will be a time where that word will come out of Poppy’s mouth, but she’d known better than to not ruin what they have between them.

“Of course, you dummy. Of course, I did.”

The silence was about to stretch on, before Bea huffed and made herself comfortable, laying her head on Poppy’s lap. “Now if you would excuse me, I’ll be taking my nap.”

The cheerleading captain then proceeded to stroke her fingers through Bea’s blonde hair to a familiar, calming rhythm and pace that would usually send Bea to her nap within minutes. As she twirled a strand of Bea’s hair around her finger, she smiled to herself.

Maybe someday, someday...I can properly convey my feelings to you.

[theangryjikooker]

Hiya! (Soft anon here btw!)

Jungkook taking it upon himself to announce that jimin is happiest with him absolutely tears up my feels 🥺 bby knows it’s true too 😭 just look at the amount of time they spend together. They enjoy each other’s company and it shows ☺️

And while we’re on the topic of jikook being soft and sweet I’m wondering what do you think of their soft tones when speaking to each other? Personally I am an absolute sucker for this 😭 It never fails to make me melt! The gimbap Vlive head nudging, how they were so patient with each other throughout 🥺 jimin’s recent bday Vlive when he calls jungkook. Like yeah, their using their insides voices and whatever BUT STILL. The way jungkook says “Aniya”, explaining he had to keep working out because his muscles are gone (LIIIIES!). Ughh. That bday Vlive was filled with some sweet af moments…I am not over the way jimin was so happy and a little embarrassed, bc bby felt so awkward and wanted someone to be there with him 🥺 gosh… I adore the way they were teasing one another by saying their names in that serious and low tone that they do.

Ahhh anyway, there’s so many other examples but I’ll spare you my fangirling. It’s just another jikook thing that gets me…I am a very weak person and I can’t stand their shenanigans 😔

P.s. I will always try to bring some kind of positively! I just love talking about the little things that make jikook JIKOOK. Do you know Wonsummernight’s motto? How they respect the analysis stuff but it’s not them? I kind of feel that way (I don’t make vids or content tho lol) but I just enjoy them and whatever their relationship is. They are just…ugh. 🤧 I’m a basic ass shipper who loves their chemistry, and while all the analysis are interesting to read about (especially if it makes logical sense) it’s not something I can dwell on for too long, simply because we will probably never know the truth of why this and that happened, or what exactly their relationship is. Just enjoy them as they are for now while we can <3

SOFT ANON! I save your ask for when my day is winding down lmao I'm not ignoring you, I swear! My head also hurts--a lot of interesting thought nuggets today.

I do love when they talk softly to one another, but I'll admit that I refrain from being loudly excited about it, because a lot of Jkkrs like to say that this tone they have is exclusively used in each other's company. But it's not like I watch enough content Jikook with other members to see if they talk that softly to the others as well..? And that's always in the back of my head, ruining everything for me lol (I only do this to myself).

Ugh, god, who invented sleep and time? I wish I could clone myself so I can force them to do this research work for me.

But seriously, outside of those thoughts, I adore the way they are with one another. Aside from the kimbap Vlive, I think it's a Bangtan Bomb where Jimin is trying to convince Taehyung and Jungkook to let him draw on their shirts, and the way Jungkook denies him but does it softly?? Help??

I don't know too much about wonsummernight, but I have seen some of their funnier compilations. I think it was one of their earlier videos that kind of helped me pay more attention to Jikook, but I do respect their take on analyses.

Thanks, I miss them now. 😭

[beamingmaylyn]

eat ramen with me - jjk || part 27

words : 1,362

warnings : alcohol consumption, swearing, fluff (?)

“He’s so wary around me, it frustrates me sometimes. I don’t say anything though, I know he means only the best.”

“What do you mean?” Donghae’s voice rang out from my phone. He was helping me make kimbap and potsticker salad for Gguk.

“Like I’m going through some big trauma and will fall apart if he does anything remotely triggering to me. As if I was in some dramatic car crash, or I got shot. At the same time, it’s helping me cope, so I guess what he’s doing is right.”

Living with Jungkook for the past week has been…interesting, to say the least. Neither one of us touched on the subject. The ‘bathroom proposal’ as Seohyun likes to call it. I was grateful for it. He let me have the guest bedroom of his house, he left me money for takeout every day which I obviously did not use. And that would lead to a whiny Jungkook, who then made me eat another packet of instant ramen while patting my head, making sure I was well fed. He even bought me my peaches & cream shampoo because ‘it makes the house smell like you, peach’.

The dynamic between us is now stronger than ever. He rants about his day while aggressively cutting up carrots for me to eat after bumping into the shower door because ‘your eyesight is so bad, idiot’. Again, he pampers me despite my protests. I rant to him about my annoying sister, and how I miss Seohyun’s air freshener while warming up his takeout. But I certainly don’t want to overstay my welcome.

One thing I miss about having my own apartment is the smell of home. It’s changed, now the same as Gguk’s. He always smells so good but now that I’m used to it, I don’t get to smell it anymore. I find myself holding onto his hugs longer, finding comfort in the more than familiar scent of his clothing.

“Hey! I had some manggaetteok today and I somehow managed to convince Jimin to not-“ Both of us froze when he walked into the kitchen.

“Uhm, Donghae we’ll talk later, yeah? Thanks.” I hung up the call and bolted out of the kitchen, shoving him towards his room. “What are you doing here?” I cried out from my plans being ruined.

“What are YOU doing here? You’ll set my kitchen on fire!” He was right. My eyes widened and I ran back to the kitchen to tend to the food.

“Are you having someone over?” I heard his shaky voice from down the hall. Was he serious? I snickered at his concerned tone. “I’m making it for you, who else would I be cooking for right now?”

“Shit, how’d you know I loved potsticker salad?” He mumbled into the top of my head with his arms ghosting over my middle. I barely noticed him entering the kitchen because I was too busy trying to keep our dinner edible. “How did you know how to make this?” His arms finally tightened around me when I leaned into his embrace.

“Seohyun’s boyfriend was helping me over FaceTime, but I’m not finished yet so go shower and change while I try to finish this.” I was flustered, embarrassed almost, for getting practically caught in the act.

I somehow managed to finish the meal, while he changed and set up the table.

“Did you buy this?” Gguk asked holding up a bottle of flower wine that he took out from the fridge. “Oh, yeah.” I briefly answered while fishing out two wine glasses out of a cupboard. “Why?”

“Well you said it was delicious, so I thought I would treat you to a bottle.” I swiped the bottle out of his hands and turned around while pouring so he wouldn’t read the embarrassment from my face. “Peach, that’s really expensive wine-“ I put my hand up, stopping his whining. “Just let me pamper you, yeah?” It was his turn to blush, as he nodded and continued to set the table.

“Cheers.” A bright smile showed up on his face once I raised my glass happily. He clinked our glasses and maintained eye contact while drinking.

“Oh god,” I said after gagging at the taste of the wine. “I forgot how much I hated this shit.” I shook my head aggressively and placed my glass next to his. Thank god for the two bottles of peach soju I bought. His laugh echoed through the house once he saw me pouring us each a shot.

“What’s the occasion for this?” “To say thank you…I hope you’re aware of how much you’ve actually been helping me. I really appreciate it and I wasn’t sure if you realized I acknowledge everything you do for me. It’s not much but, hey! At least your kitchen is still intact.” I smiled awkwardly and handed him his shot, then we drank to celebrate my success.

Hearing him praise my food preferences and cooking with every bite he took, made me even more sure in my decision.

“Hey, Jungkook?” His movements stilled completely. I would have thought time froze if it wasn’t for the rice falling from the grip of his chopsticks. Instead of answering, he looked up at me and raised his eyebrows.

“I- We’ve kind of been avoiding this subject, but I think we should talk about it.” I didn’t have to say it, he knew what I was talking about. The food now forgotten, silence overtook the room.

“It’s a shame everything turned out the way it did, we were starting to get really close and then fucking Dispatch threw us off and caused a shit storm. I still really like you, more than I did on the night you asked.”

“I really like you too, but please don’t feel pressured to talk about this. I don’t want nor expect anything in return from you because I helped you. Okay?”

“Don’t worry I know. Each day you surprise me more and more with how great of a person you are. It’s so surreal, I don’t even deserve you.” He shook his head at my words but didn’t interrupt. “I genuinely hope I make you happy the same way you make me happy.”

“If you didn’t I wouldn’t have let you fuck around in my kitchen.” He joked and tilted his head to the side, encouraging me to continue.

“So, uhm…do you want to be in a relationship with me? Do you still want to be my boyfriend?” It’s still a mystery to me how I managed to spit that out.

He smiled and raised his glass to his lips, finishing the remaining wine. “Come here.” He said softly, licking his lips from the excess wine. I stumbled out of my chair and stood in front of him. My eyes followed his as he stood up and towered over me. He gently stroked my hair and guided his hand to my cheek. “Can I kiss you?”

With both his hands tilting my face upwards and his big eyes right in front of mine, I couldn’t find a reason to deny him. I tasted the wine on his lips, but somehow I didn’t mind.

part 27 - flower wine

prev || next

eat ramen with me masterlist

summary : you keep getting texts from a random number and decide not to go against the will of the universe

a/n : credit to @inangellocumlibello for helping me with this, you a real one

taglist - if you want to be added send me an ask or a message, this way you'll be notified when i post new parts

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[joon-ipersgirl]

"dance with me" - jhs twoshot

genre: strangers to lovers!au, fluff, tiny bit of angst

pairing: hobi x reader (f)

summary: this is the first part of hobi’s birthday twoshot where he meets a girl on a night out on the town but loses her (a better summary will come later)

word count: 1.8k

warnings: some cursing, mentions of alcohol, not a happy ending rn

a/n: whew it's been a minute. as per, school and work are kicking my ass but i wanted to write something for hobi's birthday. i actually finished this first half on time but was stuck on the second half before i decided i should make this into a twoshot. i'm going to finish it though, hopefully soon. i’ll edit everything later. either way, enjoy :)

full masterlist // part two

“Guys, I really shouldn’t,” Hoseok laments.

“Why not?” Jimin whines from his sprawled out position on Hoseok’s aging leather sofa. “It’s been weeks since you’ve come out with us.”

Hoseok shrugs. “I’ve just been… busy,” he finishes lamely.

“Doing what?” Jungkook challenges from the kitchen, his voice barely carrying over the low hum of the open refrigerator.

“Okay, I guess I haven’t been doing too much. I just haven’t been in the mood? Life is just a lot right now,” Hoseok says as he picks at the fraying carpet on the floor. He really should get a new one.

“So, let us help you feel better!” Jimin rolls off the sofa, narrowly missing Hoseok’s head with his legs and keeping his leather pants intact. “A night out dancing with your best friends. Maybe a few drinks. You don’t even have to bring anyone home if you don’t want to.”

Hoseok is still iffy on Jimin’s proposal. Usually, he’d be the one encouraging his friends to enjoy a night out on the town but starting his new job at the architectural firm downtown a few weeks ago had really taken its toll. He knew that he’d have a lot to learn when he started but he didn’t think it’d be this much, the new programming and drawing systems much more sophisticated than what he’d remembered during his undergraduate matriculation. Hoseok spent much of his free time practicing his skills, exhausting himself late into the night. All he wanted to do was rest but it was proving to be challenging after his friends showed up on his doorstep tonight, demanding he join them.

“I don’t know, Jimin.”

“You don’t have to know anything. Look, if you aren’t having a good time by midnight, I’ll call you a cab home myself,” Jimin offers. “And Jungkook will buy you your first three drinks,” he tacks on after seeing Hoseok’s unwavering expression.

“Hey!” Jungkook exclaims from the entryway.

“It’s the least you could do, Jungkook. You’re literally eating him out of house and home right now,” Jimin says, pointing to the roll of kimbap Jungkook has in his hands.

“You can’t drink on an empty stomach,” the younger one counters.

“You ate an hour ago.”

“Fair enough,” Jungkook concedes. “Get dressed, Hobi. Drinks are on me,” he finishes around a mouthful of food. Jimin beams, turning to Hoseok.

Sighing, Hoseok reluctantly drags himself to his feet. “Fine. But you’re buying me drinks and dinner. Nope. I don’t want to hear it,” he says, holding up a finger. “Give me ten minutes.”

“Yes!” Jimin cheers as Hoseok heads to his room.

Twenty five minutes later, the three young men arrive at Antarri’s. Known for its strong drinks and booming bass, Antarri’s had become their regular stomping ground. It was safe to say a few other patrons recognized them in the dark; the trio’s dance reputation preceded them. On any given weekend the establishment would be flooded with young people ready to let loose their frustrations. The proximity of the city’s two major universities being just over a stone’s throw away may also help.

“Okay! Shots first!” Jimin yells over the incessant chatter. Hoseok shakes his head but follows his friend deeper into the club.

“What should we get?”

“Nothing too crazy -” Hoseok starts.

“Tequila!” Jungkook interrupts, waving his arm frantically for the bartender’s attention. Both Jimin and Hoseok blanch at the suggestion. “What? I’m buying. I should get to choose.”

Jimin shrugs. “He is buying.”

Hoseok rubs his forehead, already feeling the splitting migraine he’d have tomorrow morning. Alcohol never seemed to agree with him and he’d learned many times what pushing his limit did to him. Still, he doesn’t protest when Jungkook orders, “Your finest shots of tequila, my good sir.”

Maybe the night would pass by faster this way.

“Okay guys. What’s the game plan?” Jungkook asks around a mouthful of lime.

“Just have fun. If you’re leaving, send a text will you? I don’t want another repeat of last time,” Jimin huffs and sets his shot glass down on the counter.

“I wasn’t even gone for that long!”

“You came back the following evening missing your shirt and a shoe, Jungkook,” Jimin frowns.

“Okay but -“

“Guys,” Hoseok interjects. “Not the time.”

“Right. This is about you, Hobi. We’re going to have a great time. And you -“ Jimin points his finger at Jungkook.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’ll text the chat that I’m alive. Let’s go!” Jungkook says, pushing off the stool and heading into the crowd.

Hoseok shakes his head at his younger friend. He worried about his safety sometimes.

“You sure you’re up for this?” Jimin checks in.

“Yeah, yeah. Go have fun. I’ll see you in there,” Hoseok responds. Nodding, Jimin pats him on the arm before setting off.

“Remember, I’ll call you a cab if you aren’t having fun,” he calls over his shoulder and then disappears.

Moving over to a less crowded part of the bar, Hoseok leans against the wall. Already his shirt is starting to stick to his skin. The music blares at an obscene level he feels in his bones and he welcomes the feeling.

Though an architect by trade, Hoseok knew his way around a dance floor. He wasn’t captain of the university’s dance team for no reason. Music was a language Hoseok translated with his body, each syllable corresponding to a particular movement as he listened to each rhythm and rhyme. Closing his eyes, he lets it speak it to him.

It doesn’t take long for him to get lost in the feeling. Limbs moving freely, Hoseok glides across the floor easily. He’s not concerned with the curious onlookers as he grooves to one of Billboard’s latest bangers. A small crowd has started to form around him but Hoseok ignores them as he spins through a move. Then, he sees you.

His body sputters through the movement until he slows to a gentle rock, eyes trying to focus on you through the pockets between people’s heads. You aren’t looking at him. Too engrossed in your own movement as you vibe with the music. Hoseok almost feels as though he’s watching himself dance. Intrigued, he moves closer.

He’s pretty sure he’s never seen you here before. Granted he doesn’t remember every face he sees but Hoseok is positive he would remember you because of the way you move. Blinking, he feels like he’s in a trance as he watches you turn, your hips swaying in time with the beat. Hoseok realizes he’s not the only one watching you. A few other guys have gathered but you ignore their presence, favoring to dance alone. Hoseok chews his lip. Did he even have a chance?

The music changes and Hoseok watches you change your movement to match the tempo seamlessly. He smiles. He would do exactly the same. Smooth RnB filters out over the sound system and Hoseok calms his beating heart, finding his own rhythm again as he slips back into his translation. When he turns, he makes eye contact with you, a small smile on your lips as you regard him. He’s pretty sure it’s the alcohol that makes him bold enough to take a step towards you.

Though you don’t move closer, your eyes don’t leave Hoseok’s. A silent exchange happens between you as you continue dancing and Hoseok matches your movements while maintaining his distance. Hoseok nearly holds his breath as you tentatively step closer. If he were to reach out, he’d surely be able to touch you. He doesn’t though. The two of you continue to dance in front of one another, though not with each other as the song changes.

When you turn - back towards him and continue dancing - Hoseok isn’t too sure of what to do. He doesn’t want to impose and ruin your night but he sure as hell would love to dance with you. He takes another tentative step forward, the space between you what chaperones at prom would call encroaching on dangerous territory. Still, he doesn’t touch you though he’s sure you can feel his breath dance across your skin.

It’s you who makes the final move.

He feels your fingertips brush against the outside of his thigh until your fingers wrap around his and place them on your hip. Jeans slung low on your waist, Hoseok’s thumb rests against your bare skin. He lets his other hand settle on the outside of your thigh, his touch light so not to scare you.

Chest against your back, Hoseok matches his hips with yours, the swell of your ass pressed tightly to his crotch. When you curl your arm around the back of his neck, fingers splayed in the hairs at his nape, Hoseok squeezes you in reflex. The heat of Antarri’s only grows worse as you continue to dance and another small crowd gathers to watch you.

Hoseok has never felt so at ease dancing with another human being. He feels like you’ve been partners since you were three and took classical ballroom together for eighteen years. You read his movements and he reads yours as you trade the role of leader and follower back and forth. In all honesty, Hoseok doesn’t want the night to end, especially when you hit a particularly dangerous move - bending at the waist with your hands on your knees, the push back firm as his hand ghosts your back. He has to stifle a groan at the sight, more than a few ungentlemanly thoughts surfacing in response.

Spinning you around, Hoseok gazes down at you as he slots one of his legs between yours. A gentle smile crosses your face and you rest your hands loosely around his neck. Hoseok gently brushes your damp hair from your forehead. You don’t look away as his hand comes to rest under your jaw. He watches your tongue swipe against your bottom lip as he wraps his arm around -

“Y/N!”

The moment is broken at the scream of what Hoseok assumes is your name.

“Y/N, come on! We have to go! Code Blue!” Hoseok loosens his hold on you as you step away. Before either of you can utter a word, your friend is pulling you through the crowd and away from him. Over the din of the music, he faintly hears you call a “Sorry!” as you disappear.

Stunned, Hoseok stands in the middle of the crowd as your figure slowly becomes lost in the sea of swaying bodies. He feels like he’s just stepped out of a sauna, the trance you placed him in lifting as people start to fill in the space around him now that the show is over. Hoseok rubs his face in frustration. How could he have let you leave like that? How was he supposed to find you?

“Hobi! Hey Hobi!” Hoseok turns at the sound of his name to see Jimin elbowing his way through the crowd. “Hey, are you okay?”

Sighing, Hoseok nods.

“Okay,” Jimin says wearily. “Do you want to leave?”

“No, it’s okay. Jungkook still owes me two more shots. I gotta collect.”

Jimin grins. “That’s the spirit! Come on, let’s go.”

Tossing one last longing look to what was supposed to be a promising night, Hoseok follows his friend to the bar to forget what could have happened.

full masterlist // part two

joon-ipersgirl, 2021

[uncreativetitletrack]

I Am Me

Pairing: Yeonjun x Reader

Word Count: 15.6k

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Summary: Yeonjun wants to be more than his titles, some that doesn’t even belong to him. He just wants to be himself, but when the media doesn’t let him, it takes a toll on him.

Warnings: Some **spoiler**, but I just want to say that I’m not trying to antagonize BTS or fans from either bands in this story. It’s a highly dramatized, fictional story, and I’m sorry if it offends you in any way!

You’ll never forget that day, walking down the halls at three in the morning. You didn’t want to be there because you just spent the entire day working. ‘Appreciate that you have a secure job at that entertainment agency’ is what your friends and family would tell you after landing a great opportunity to work at one of the most famous music companies. You hated working here because of the pressure of working for nearly the entire day managing five trainees. There’s so much workload that you even contemplated on quitting.

But peeking through the door that’s slightly ajar of a dance room, it changed your entire perspective. It gave you another reason to keep going forward with these trainees. Sitting alone in the hollow practice room is Yeonjun, curled up in a ball. His shirt is drenched in sweat, or at least that’s what you thought. Although it is sweat, it took you a moment to realize that some of the wet spots on his shirt are also tears. This young man, who dreams of becoming a star, is sitting by himself in a defeated pose like he’s going to give in to the overwhelming stress. No one is there to comfort him, left to be ridiculed by his dark thoughts. Only at the ripe age of eighteen, he already thinks that he’s incompetent.

“I can’t do this anymore…” He muttered under his breath.

==========

“Jokbal! Jokbal! Jokbal!” Yeonjun chants, fist-pumping the air.

You and Yeonjun are at the grocery store, looking through the meat section. While you’re looking for pig trotters, he’s singing a tune he made up in his head with the only lyrics to his song is jokbal. He’s wearing a face mask and baseball hat to hide his identity, but those aren’t enough to hide the excitement in his eyes.

“Get the spicy kind!”

“Alright, alright.”

“Let’s also get chicken feet! Pizza! Pasta!”

You chuckle. “You sound like a child.”

“What’s there not to be excited about? You said that we can be spoiled brats tonight, so I wanna eat whatever I want.”

“Yea, but don’t you think it’s going to be too much for you guys to eat?”

“Eh, it’s fine,” he waves his hand nonchalantly. “It’s coming from the company’s credit card, right? That means we’re finally allowed to eat anything with no limits. Besides, we don’t have a recording tomorrow, so we don’t gotta worry about looking puffy.”

You don’t think you’ll ever understand how Yeonjun’s brain is wired. Still, it’s great seeing him smile this much. In the midst of their busy schedule, they have the entire day off. And the day before, it ended perfectly with their first win for Crown. They’ve never been this exuberant before.

“Also, let’s get some bubble tea. Kai and Soobin might want some ice cream too. Beomgyu wants kimbap and Taehyun wants some toast. Let’s go, let’s go!”

“Give me a sec. I still have to get some jokbal, then restock kimchi for you guys. Also, you guys need some more tangerine—”

“No more tangerines! We eat that enough already. Bubble tea!!!” He’s like a child about to receive a lollipop.

Despite being the eldest, he’s got a cute side to him that you find lovable. “Alright, where do you wanna get your drink?”

“Let’s go to 7 Leafs! I heard a new one opened down the street.”

“Okay, after we shop. Text the other boys what they want.”

“Yessir.”

“Excuse me?”

“Yes, Ma’am.” He puckers his lips, swaying his head side-to-side playfully.

You hurriedly look through the shopping list on your phone. The boys must be starving back at the dorms, so you want to hurry and get back as soon as possible. You can already imagine Beomgyu clinging onto one of the members and whining about how hungry he is.

While Yeonjun’s distracted with his phones, two women are whispering and pointing at him, occasionally giggling like school girls. Even with his disguise, he’s still spotted. Though, what did you expect? With their explosive debut, they’re bound to be instantly recognized in the public.

“…Go…” One girl mutters.

“No, you go first.”

They nudge each other, pushing one over the other to see who gets to Yeonjun first. He’s still oblivious to the fans, finishing his text message and sending it to the group chat. During times like these, you would push Yeonjun away from these girls to avoid drawing more attention, but since they aren’t hinting at any sort of danger, you decide to let it be.

After some minor arguments, one of the girls approaches him, although she keeps her eyes locked to the ground. “Uhm…excuse me?”

Her voice catches Yeonjun’s attention, so he turns to her, startling her. “Hello?”

“Are you…Yeonjun from Tomorrow by Together?”

He nods, and she squeals.

“I-I’m sorry if I’m bothering you!!”

Her eyes are fixated on Yeonjun. Even though you’re right next to him, she behaves like you don’t exist.

“No, it’s really fine. Did you want to take a picture? Manager, we can take a picture, right?”

You shrug your shoulders. “Go ahead.”

“O-oh, I wasn’t intending on taking a picture. I was just wondering...” she rummages through her purse.

Yeonjun’s eyes lighten up at the thought that this lady is going to give him a gift. He even got his hand out and ready to accept the present. Eventually, she finds what she wanted to give, and it’s a small box of chocolate the size of his hand.

“I was wondering if you can give these to Taehyung-oppa!” She covers her mouth.

And that gleam of happiness is immediately diminished, like a gust of wind blown against a lit candle. You don’t need to see under his mask to know that he lost the will to smile. It’s like his confidence has been stomped on, glaring down at the gift that isn’t even his. It’s not even for another member from his group—it’s for their senior.

“M-my friend and I have been fans of BTS since we were nineteen, so can you let him know that we’re thankful for everything he’s done? He really saved me from the darkest time in my life.”

He’s at a loss of words, baffled at this outrageous request. But rather than going off on the woman, Yeonjun laughs stiffly, scratching the back of his head. “I’m sorry I don’t know if I can give it to him because we don’t see each other much.”

Her shy nature disappears, cocking her head to the side and raising an eyebrow. “Huh? But you’re the same company. How do you guys not see each other often? I thought you guys are already like family to them.”

“It’s…much more complicated than that. Our schedules never correlate, so that’s why. If it makes you feel better, we can take a picture and—”

“Then…it’s okay. Sorry to bother you guys. You can have the chocolate though.” She waves goodbye and returns to her friend.

You should’ve stepped in when you had the chance. Yeonjun is at a loss of words as he watches the two girls trek off as if this never happened. Even though they’re walking off, he can hear fragments of their conversation.

“He kind of looks like Taehyungie-oppa…do you think he…passed auditions…becau…looks?” One whispers.

“Maybe. But…chin…too big. Teeth too.”

If you two weren’t in public, then you would’ve smacked them without hesitation. To bother Yeonjun during his day off only to push him aside because he’s not the idol they’re looking for, it’s just outright rude. This clearly ruined his mood, and now he’s become sullen. He rubs his chin, thinking about the last girl’s comment.

“Ignore them. Let’s go back and celebrate, yea?”

He nods, but his smile hasn’t returned.

==========

“Here you guys go!” You set a plate of jokbal on the floor.

In the living room of their crowded dorm, the five of them crowd around the meal that you’ve prepared for them. Despite the many clothes that are sprawled across the floor and trash left out on the coffee table, you’re able to brush them aside to make room for the six of you to sit together. Other than the pigs’ feet, there’s also pizza and chicken feet. Beomgyu’s mouth waters, but before he even eats, he briefly takes pictures of it with his phone.

“You didn’t have to waste your time making this when you could’ve just ordered it.” Taehyun states with a monotone expression.

“I know, but in honor of your first win, I wanted to cook from scratch.”

“You made the pigs’ feet, but you ended up ordering pizza and chicken feet…” Taehyun flicks open a can of Coke.

“Okay, pizza is hard to make from scratch, and chicken feet…the nails…” Shivers run down your spine.

“Taehyun…you could at least say thank you,” Soobin elbows him.

Now flustered, Taehyun looks down. “…Sorry…thank you.”

“No, no! It’s okay. For all we know, my cooking is probably not that great.”

“Anything from the Manager is going to be super great! Thank you very much!!” Huening Kai leans over and rubs your stomach.

“Hurry, hurry! Let’s eat.” Beomgyu takes a plate full of chicken feet.

“Says the one who kept taking pictures.” Soobin mumbles.

Each member takes a plate of food. Even though you know full well how average your cooking is, the boys are starving, so they’ll take anything. Everyone digs in to their dinner, all except for Yeonjun. As you’re eating the pizza, stretching the cheese from your mouth, you stare at him, waiting for him to take a bite.

“Yeonjun? Are you gonna eat?” You ask while covering your mouth full of food.

He shakes his head, rubbing his chin. “No…I’m not hungry.”

“What? But you were so excited to eat.”

“I’m full from the bubble tea.”

He gets up and walks to their bedroom, which is extremely out of the ordinary. He never says no to food. Even when they’re dieting, he’s the one who would sneak in food. Now that they have a chance to eat whatever they like, he’s not eating.

“Did something happen to Hyung?” Soobin asks curiously.

“Some girls were being rude.”

You didn’t expect it to take a toll on him this much. What they did has definitely squash his confidence, but knowing him, there has to be more than what those girls said.

==========

Yeonjun is sitting on his bunk bed, laying on his stomach and watching a video on his phone. He hears a knock at the door.

“Yeonjun? Can I come in?” You ask from the other side of the door.

He pauses the video. “Come in.”

You open the door, closing it behind you. Their bedroom is tidier than usual, and it’s probably because you were coming over for the night. Most of their clothes are hanging in the living room, so the floor isn’t riddled with clothes compared to the living room.

“I told them to save some for you in case you wanna eat later. How’re you feeling?”

“I’m fin—.”

“Be honest.”

You take a seat at the edge of his bed. He sits up, placing his pillow on his lap and scooting closer to you.

“Okay, I have a question…and you have to be honest.”

“What is it?”

“Do I look like V-sunbaenim?”

You crease your eyebrows. “V-sunbaenim? As in, Kim Taehyung?”

He nods.

“You two look nothing alike.”

“Really?”

“Yes, you look like yourself.”

“…That’s not what people say. Everyone is always telling us that we look like BTS-sunbaenim or that everything we do reminds them of them. I don’t want to sound like a brat, but I really don’t like it. One second, they’re saying that Soobin looks like Jin-sunbaenim, and the other second, they’re calling Taehyun Jungkook-sunbaenim’s clone. Do we seriously look like them?”

It’s not only himself he’s concerned about, but the other members as well. After their debut, many news outlets exploded with articles about the similarities between them and their senior group. It was your typical cover page with a side-by-side comparison between two members, each from TXT and BTS, red circles around specific parts of their face and drawing arrows to each other. Some of them were outrageous claims, like how Soobin learned how to blow kisses from Seokjin even though Soobin only did it once and it was because the host of the radio show told him to do it.

Some people even went to the extreme and called TXT clout chasers, accusing the young boys for being too privileged. While they were treated with luxuries, they were bombarded with negative comments. It was to be expected, but they weren’t prepared for this extraordinary amount of dislike. Even when they did receive compliments, it never felt genuine because somehow and some way, the same people would draw comparisons to them to their seniors, crediting them for teaching TXT how to be polite.

“None of you guys look like them at all. If you think about it this way, and by no means am I disregarding your frustrations, you guys debuted during the peak of BTS’s popularity. These comparisons were bound to happen. All we can do now is be patient and wait for this to die down. Besides, you guys have a good amount of fans who aren’t forcing themselves to like you guys.”

Despite still being gloomy, you’re able to get Yeonjun to laugh, exhaling through his nose. He elbows your arm. “How are you so optimistic all the time?”

“Because I’ve seen pretty much every second of your rehearsals, and I’m always freakin’ impressed every time I watch. I can’t wait until people acknowledge it too.”

He hides his face in the pillow. “Yea…I can’t wait for that too.”

==========

After being appointed as their temporary manager, the first time you met them was in Los Angele. They looked so young and naïve back then. Beomgyu, Soobin, and Huening Kai had this sort of innocence in their eyes, like they needed to be guided constantly. Despite being the same age as Huening Kai, Taehyun was always calm and professional, never allowing his nervousness show. But as for Yeonjun…arrogant is what you would describe your first impression of him.

The way he stood firm, his chin up and his eyes looking down. You knew that he isn’t a bad person, but it’s just his posture that you never liked. It was like he stood above everyone, his hands in his pockets and constantly in his ‘cool’ pose like a model. Your suspicions of his arrogance came with confirmation when you learned that he’s ranked as number one in vocals, rap, and dance. To add on to the fire, he’s also a trainee for one of the biggest entertainment companies in South Korea, so it’s no surprise that he’s carrying a luggage full of reasons to feel proud.

Wow, this guy probably got everything handed to him, you thought to yourself. When you started your work as their manager, you put the least amount of attention on him. You assumed that since he’s the eldest and is already sufficient with every aspect of being an idol, you didn’t bother with putting in effort for him.

==========

You sit in a conference room with sales and marketing team. The lead of the team stands next to the projector, slamming a stack of paper on the table. The loud bang causes the other employees to jump, including you.

“61,400 only??” He exclaims. “Just 61k was sold?! Tell me what the fuck happened to the sales?!”

On the projector, there’s a bar graph of TXT’s sales history. It records the number of albums that were sold between the two albums: TDC Dream and TDC Magic.

“S-Sir…we tried our best…but it’s just that…”

“Don’t give me your fucking excuses. You all were riding on the expectation that these teens were gonna bring back the same numbers. This isn’t even enough to pay back the budget used to make the damn music video,” he sighs in frustration. “Jesus Christ. BTS are still on their break, but the amount they made off of their Summer Package is enough to pay for three music videos. We’re gonna have to ask for a lower budget for the second music video.”

You glance back at the chart. It hurts seeing their two albums stand side-by-side and that dramatic drop between them. Not only that, but their music video isn’t doing so well either. Compared to their debut music video, they didn’t even have half of what they got on the first day, going from fourteen million views on Crown to a little under five million for 9 and Three Quarters. This is still exponentially well in terms of rookie group standards, but there’s more to it—there are expectations to be met.

It could easily be excused that the video website’s streaming rules have changed, but to have that huge drop can’t simply be because of a system. It’s already been a few days, and the views are barely going up.

But what you’re mostly worried about is what the boys think about this. To have received so much attention in the beginning only to be pretty much dropped off the face of Earth is no simple feat.

==========

You return to the practice room where the boys are rehearsing with their choreographer. While their coach i flicks his eyes at you then returning back to work, none of the boys bat an eye at you, which is normal. They’re so focused on training that nothing can get them out of it.

Once they finish the entire song, their dance coach turns off their song. “Take five.”

Almost like they’ve been put out of a trance, they snapped to their usual selves, falling to the ground and breathing heavily. Huening Kai is the first to notice you, running to you with what little strength he has left.

“Managerrr!! Save me!” He yelps.

He wraps his arms around you, his hand clasping around your stomach, and you get a strong scent of sweat coming from him. Though, it doesn’t bother you since nearly every time you come into this room, they’re sweating logs.

“Kai is sexually harassing her.” Beomgyu teasingly shouts.

“What?! No, I’m not. Am I, Manager?” He looks at you with his puppy eyes.

“Not at all. How was practice today, guys?”

“We’re doing well! Just tightening some loose ends after we ended our first week of performing.” Soobin pulls Huening Kai away from you.

Huening Kai was about to whine, but Soobin passes a water bottle to him. Dying for water, Kai gives up the complaining for water, taking huge gulps.

“Loose ends? But I thought you guys did great on stage.”

“Not enough,” Beomgyu chimes in. “Our timing is off when we change positions.”

“Kai, don’t take too long to lift me up. If you take more than a second, then it messes up the rest of us.” Taehyun comments.

“Ah…okay…sorry.” He lowers his head.

“I think Kai is improving a lot. It’s so cute seeing him trying to lift Taehyun on his own.” Soobin touches shoulders with Huening Kai to cheer him up.

Huening Kai lets out a small chuckle while you’re adoring their playfulness. You glance at Yeonjun, glaring at himself in the mirror. He runs his hand through his sweaty hair. You don’t know what he’s thinking, but just by that serious look on his face alone, you can tell that he’s not happy.

“How was the meeting?” Soobin takes a sip from the water bottle.

“Uhm…it went okay.”

“What was it about again?”

“It’ll bore you guys if I explain it, so I rather not say. But they’re going to change things up a bit for the second music video’s filming.”

“Oh really?” Beomgyu asks. “Why?”

You can’t bring yourself to tell them the truth. They don’t go on the internet often, especially when it comes to anything that has anything to do with them, so they don’t know much about the records they break or don’t break. If they found out that the number of support they got for this comeback has become lackluster, then it’ll just devastate them.

“Uhm…change in artistic direction.” You pull that out of your ass.

They seem to take your word for it, so it makes you a little relieved. But while the other members moved on, one glance at Yeonjun and you knew that he isn’t convinced. Yeonjun opens his mouth to say something, so you quickly think of diverting this possibility.

“A-anyway, when rehearsals are done, we have to go to on some shows. I’ll let you guys know when it’s time to go.”

You walk out of the room, sighing. Just as you predicted, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell them the truth. How do you go about telling them that they didn’t do so well for this comeback? Not only that, but with your lack of experience as a manager, what can you say or do to encourage them? Even if you don’t tell them, they’ll find out eventually. And you already have a feeling that Yeonjun already does.

You peek through the crack of the door, watching the boys sitting down on the ground. Even though they’re supposed to take a break, they’re watching a recording of themselves to see if they can finds places to improve on.

==========

Yeonjun is in the center of the main dance practice room, free-styling to a song that infuses hip hop and heavy rap. The rest of the students are sitting by the walls. You sit with the other members as they’re just as mesmerized as the rest of the students. The way his body flows so smoothly with the rhythm is so satisfying to watch. If you didn’t know who he was, then you would’ve assumed that he was a coach or a celebrity, not a trainee.

You look at the other members. Soobin is like a high school girl experiencing their first love—his eyes are fixated on him, covering his gaping mouth in pure awe. Huening Kai is bopping his head to the song, more so enjoying the music itself than Yeonjun’s dance, although he still finds it entertaining to watch.

On the other hand, Beomgyu and Taehyun look jealous. Just one look and you can tell that in their heads, they’re most likely thinking, I can do that too. And that’s one thing you don’t particularly like about Yeonjun. He takes the spotlight and enjoys it. He doesn’t share any of it with the other boys. While you’re impressed by his dance, you don’t find his narcissism impressive in the slightly.

When the song ends, the entire class applauds. Soobin claps louder and faster than the rest of the students, bouncing up and down from his spot. The three younger members applaud as well. But Yeonjun doesn’t even look at his teammates. He waves his hands up like he wants the crowd to get louder.

“Okay, who wants to go next?” The coach asks.

A large number of students raise their hands, including Beomgyu. Although Taehyun makes it clear that he’s jealous of the attention that Yeonjun receives, he knows full well that he’s incapable of surpassing him in dance. Then there’s Soobin and Huening Kai who would rather be on the side.

After the coach chooses the next person to freestyle, you were expecting Yeonjun to sit with you and the boys. But to your surprise, he sits with other people, receiving high fives from the other students. It really ticks you off seeing him have the audacity to act like he’s too cool for the boys. You want to bring this up with them, but they don’t seem to particularly mind.

“That was fucking awesome, dude.” One of the students says in English.

“Thanks, I know I was cool.” Yeonjun replies in English as well.

You truly cannot find a reason to like Yeonjun even if he hasn’t done anything directly to you. He’s just so pompous and full of himself. When the members told you that he loves bragging about being ranked top in every category, they weren’t exaggerating. If anything, they weren’t exaggerating enough. With each passing day, Yeonjun starts hanging out less and less with the members unless it’s necessary, such as the private lessons with the five of them or when they’re filming for future projects. Perhaps it’s also the façade that he puts out a lot that you also don’t like. If you really are going to become their manager, you can’t picture yourself being close with him at all.

While you’re too busy finding reason to despise Yeonjun, you catch a glimpse of something. His hands are shaking a lot, but he tries to hide it by putting his hands behind his back.

==========

“You guys look so cute!!” You clasp your hands together.

The boys walk out of their dressing room in matching pink sailor outfits. Your jaw drops at how absolutely adorable they look in them—like anime characters coming to life. When their appearance on the show goes on air, their fans will definitely go insane.

“Huening Kai and Taehyun are the cutest.”

Huening Kai’s cheeks turn pink from your compliment while Taehyun looks indifferent. You turn to Soobin and Beomgyu, and they fit into the cute concept as well.

“I’d prefer something that shows off my more adult side…” Soobin puffs his cheeks while nodding his head.

The way he sulks only amplifies his cuteness. The outfits complement their physical appearance except for their overarching height. But after doing a head count, you notice that there’s somebody missing. You look around, and the eldest is nowhere to be found.

“Where’s Yeonjun?”

“I think he’s still in the dressing room.”

“I’m gonna go get him.”

 You walk to the dressing room, knocking three times. “Yeonjun? You in there?”

“Yea.”

“You almost done? You guys have to go on in a few minutes.”

“Y-yea, just give me a second.”

Yeonjun twists the doorknob, opening it and peeking his head out. You cross your arms, waiting for him to completely walk out, but he’s too embarrassed to show himself.

“What’s wrong?”

“I look dumb.”

You scoff. “I’m sure you look fine.”

“No…”

“Come on, it’s not as bad as you think it is. Besides, the other boys are wearing it too, so you’re not alone.”

“It’s just…”

“You’re fine!”

Feeling impatient, you pull him out of the room. Just as you thought, he’s wearing the sailor uniform like the rest of them. He tries to stand in a masculine pose, slouching his back slightly and putting his hands in his pocket. You can tell he feels humiliated to be in this outfit.

“See? You look cute.”

“That’s the problem. Just because we’re young doesn’t mean that we have to dress like kids. I’m twenty-one for crying out loud.”

“Twenty-one and rocking that look. Come on, even if it looks childish, you can still make it look cool,” you check the time on your phone. “Oh, they’re waiting for us. Let’s go.”

Just as you were about to walk away, you look back to find Yeonjun not moving from his spot. He’s still sulking about the clothes. This is bothering him more than you thought, and you wish you can do something about it, but with the limited time that they have, you can’t change the stylist’s mind.

“Yeonjun?”

“…I want to wear suits like BTS-sunbaenim.”

You freeze, everything around you falling silent. You try thinking of anything to make him feel better, but with every direction you go, it doesn’t form proper sentences. You can think of the usual ‘don’t think too much about it’ or ‘you look great in the outfit’, but they’re shallow assurance, and it won’t make him feel any better.

“You guys are on in five minutes!” A staff member shouts from the room.

“Okay!” You let the staff know before turning back to Yeonjun. “Let’s go.”

That’s all you could say, and it made you seem disingenuous. If only there was a way to make him feel better, but with being a new manager, it also comes with many trial and errors, including some major and minor mistakes. You sort of feel pathetic for not thinking of any clever quotes to cheer him up.

==========

You stand on the other side of the cameras as the five boys speak to the hosts, a man and a woman. They’re dressed in a ridiculous amount of pink, and the entire room itself is fluttered with pink too. Despite the pinkness, the other side is contrasted with silent darkness, sound producers, scriptwriters, and cameramen being blanketed with the damp blackness of the studio while the members and two hosts are riddled with twenty shades of pink.

Since they’re still new to the showbiz world, they’re as stiff as usual, but unlike their debut, they’ve loosened up a bit more. They’re moving around and smiling more, which is a huge step forward. However, despite their more natural side are shown in a better light, Yeonjun is rigid. His hands are behind his back, not moving an inch. And that smile that you know is forced.

“We’re really happy to have K-pop’s next big boy group be on the show!” The male host shouts with an exaggerated enthusiasm. “Tomorrow by Together is known as the monster rookie group, already hitting records and completing their first US tour.”

The five boys clap, cheering sarcastically.

“Despite being so young, they’re pretty tall. On average, their height is 181.3 cm, which is an amazing record on its own. None of you guys have a fixed position either, both in talents and looks!” The female host chimes in.

Everything seems to be going well so far. This show is known for portraying each individual members’ special talents, so this is a great opportunity for the boys to stand out on their own.

“Let’s introduce each member from right to left. Taehyun.”

“Yes.”

As usual, Taehyun is excellent in professional settings. Despite his young age, he knows how to think and act on the spot, improvising and thinking of the right words to say. His timing is never off, and he can read the atmosphere without a problem. It makes the audience, even you, forget that he’s a teenager.

The hosts go through each member, showing off more of their personalities. On the opposite end of the spectrum is Huening Kai. Unlike Taehyun who remains calm yet makes witty comments, Huening Kai is less prepared, but he balances that out with his bubbly personality. He laughs to lighten the mood, knowing how to recover from an embarrassing mistake and turning it into a joke.

Although upon first impression, Beomgyu seemed like the kind of guy who doesn’t mind the shy and cute concept, he’s a natural when it comes to being charismatic and masculine. He can talk to anybody and make it appear like they’ve been friends for years. He doesn’t let the air become awkward and is able to fill it up.

Soobin is the one who makes the most mistakes, his mind often trailing off and messing up his lines. He lets the nervousness take over him, often laughing and hugging the closest member to release some tension. Despite the many mistakes, he repeats himself until he perfects it. His cycle of making and fixing his slip-ups makes the hosts find it endearing.

Last person is Yeonjun. When the hosts lay their eyes on him, he nods and forces a smile.

“Now…last but not least, Choi Yeonjun: born on September 13th, the oldest member, been the trainee the longest and is ranked number one on all three categories, vocals, rap, and dance. Wow, that’s a lot for one person.”

“Yes.” He answers.

“Even though I think you’re all very handsome men, I think you should also be ranked number one in terms of visual too.”

“Ah…” he laughs nervously. “Thank you.”

“I mean, you deserve that title! You have a lot of resemblance with your BTS senior, V-ssi.”

And with that, the light in his eyes disappears.

“You have the hair color, the eyes, and the striking visuals in general. I think you two are even the same height.”

“Ah ha ha…yes.”

Huening Kai is the first to sense Yeonjun’s discomfort, so he steps in to make a comment. “Yeonjun-hyung was always the first trainee to introduce himself. He would take us to the whiteboard with the rankings and ask who was number one in each category. We were all shocked when he said that it was him.”

“Oh, really? Okay, let’s give Yeonjun a chance to show off his skills, starting off with dance.”

Yeonjun steps forward, and to your side, the producers choose a song to put on. Unsurprisingly, they put on a BTS song, Dope. Within seconds, Yeonjun got the gist of the beat and dances to the song accordingly. He doesn’t make a single mistake despite the lack of practice, which is remarkable on its own.

They then put on the next song, which happens to be Boy in Luv. Unlike the fast-pace dancing, it switches to a slower tempo, but he has to show more of his aggressive side. And just like that, he’s got the choreography memorized as well. Once again, they switch the song, but…it’s another BTS song, Fake Love.

This wasn’t a part of the script. They were supposed to play other pop songs and some American music to give him the chance to freestyle. With this last-minute change, Yeonjun falters, only knowing the basics to the Fake Love choreography, but not grasping onto the details that well.

The female host signals the music to stop. “How do you mess up one of their recent songs? Fake Love is played everywhere. You two are in the same company and got more chances to see them practice. You should know their songs to heart.”

Although that was supposed to be a joke, Yeonjun took it personally. You can see that her words have pierced through his chest. You don’t like how she’s putting him on the spot with unrealistic expectations.

“Okay,” the male host interrupts. “Let’s try again but with a different song.”

He waves his hand down, cueing for the next song to play. Yeonjun shakes his hands and spreads his legs out shoulder length, determined to get this one right. The producer plays the song, and it’s Boy with Luv.

Yeonjun freezes. He hasn’t learned this dance because this song came out during the most hectic training period. They were practicing to their songs nonstop as well as performing on stages.

The female host makes it very apparent that she’s disappointed. “Stop, stop, stop. It’s okay, even if you don’t know your seniors’ songs that well, you should at least know this one. It’s simple to learn and it’s their latest song.”

Yeonjun chuckles nervously. “You’re right…”

It’s agonizing to watch this host tear Yeonjun down. There’s clearly some bias here, and she’s going at him more than the other members. It might be because he’s been the trainee the longest or because of his title as the ‘monster trainee’ to increase her expectations on him, this is still borderline harassment. Thankfully, the other members are seeing this as well, so they look at each other, almost like using telepathy to back up their eldest member.

Soobin raises his hand. “Taehyun and Beomgyu have memorized the dance.”

“Oh really?”

“That’s right,” Beomgyu steps forward. “I’ve been a hardcore fan of BTS even before I became a trainee. I’ve studied every single thing, including the timing of their facial expressions.”

“I also enjoy listening to Jungkook-sunbaenim’s English covers. I know all his cover songs by heart.” Taehyun enters the conversations calmly.

This is off-script, but it’s a relief that you can rely on the members to help each other out of a pinch. You nonverbally sigh, but your troubles haven’t left you. It was the members who had to help, and you couldn’t do anything. Not only that, but the deed has already been done. To see the sunken spirit in Yeonjun’s eyes, it hurts. You wish you can reach your hand out to tell him that everything’s alright, you can’t just interrupt recording. All you can do is watch from afar.

==========

In the hallway, Yeonjun is just walking out of the restroom after changing back into his street clothes. Opposite to the cute sailor outfits, he’s wearing a leather jacket and blue jeans, with tan boots that completes it all. Even though you liked both outfits that he was wearing today, nothing beats Yeonjun dressed in the clothes that he’s more confident in.

Standing outside of the men’s restroom is you. He’s caught off-guard to see you waiting. “What are you doing here?”

“I just felt like it.”

“Where are the other guys?”

“They’re still changing. Why didn’t you tell me that you went to the restroom?”

“It was just a quick whizz.”

“You should still tell me.”

He walks back to the room and you follow him from behind. “You’re not my mom.”

“But I’m technically your mom!”

“That’s…let’s not get there. Aren’t you our age?”

“I dunno, am I?”

With this conversation going nowhere, he stops. Even though he sounds a bit harsh, you know that he doesn’t mean to. Today’s show recording was definitely unfair, so it’s not a surprise to see Yeonjun down in the dumps.

“Good job today.”

“Thanks, but I don’t feel like I did well. Not even average or decent.”

“Hey, but you got it over with and that’s all that matters. Now, onto the next one!”

“Yea…”

Despite your efforts in cheering him up, it doesn’t work. Pretending like the issue doesn’t exist isn’t going to make things better for him.

“What that host said, it’s still bothering you, huh?”

He can’t hide from you as well. “You got me. This feeling kinda sucks…”

“I can tell. I don’t think she means it though.”

“You’re siding with her?”

“I’m not. Yea, what she did was really horrible, but everyone’s caught up in the heat where they want to only talk about your seniors. TV shows are dying for BTS to be on their show, but they’re too busy touring. It’s rude, but even for other bands, your sunbaenims are constantly brought up.”

“That’s true…”

“Besides, that doesn’t matter. Anyway, I’m gonna drop by the convenient store to buy some snacks. What do you want?”

“…Can I go with you?”

“What? No, you should be resting! Take every chance to take a nap, relax your muscles, or play some video games! Don’t do something as boring as coming with me to the store.”

“It’s not boring to me. Going to the store with you soothes my nerves. No joke.”

Your cheeks turn red when he grins. It’s been a while since you last saw him smile like that, so you can’t say no to him.

==========

Seoul is filled with your stereotypical description of the urban lifestyle—honking cars, citizens striding through thick crowds of people, and flashing lights at every corner. Since it’s night, the skyscrapers are covered in squares of screens that display an array of advertisements such as drinks, clothes, and latest phone models.

You and Yeonjun are two out of millions going through the city and back to the studio. Despite wearing a mask and beanie to cover his identity, he still stands out like a sore thumb. Girls can’t help but glance and admire his towering, lean body.

“Ah, I really like times like these when we get to go out and enjoy the city air.” You point your nose to the sky and inhale.

“You mean the pollution and bacteria traveling into your nostrils?”

You elbow him. “You didn’t have to phrase it like that!”

He laughs.

One thing you like about this is not only breaking away from the busy life in the entertainment business, but being with Yeonjun. Behind the cameras, he’s an ordinary young adult who enjoys the little things, like walking in the city and making jokes. He doesn’t have to put up a show or be conscious of how he dresses and correcting his posture. He doesn’t have to censor his words and can say whatever he wishes.

You get a text message, and it’s from the group chat. “Taehyun said that Beomgyu is starving to death. Let’s hurry.”

You pick up the pace and so does Yeonjun. You two pass by many small shops that are surviving each day to make ends meet. Some of them are antique shops, record stores, and clothing lines. One of them is a toy store. If you could, you would love to go to them but with very little spare time you have in your hands, it’s too far into the future for you think about it.

You look up at the night sky and notice how particularly cloudy it is. Not only that, but the weather has been getting colder these days.

“Geez, I think it’s gonna rain soon. What do you think, Yeonjun?”

No response.

“Yeonjun?”

You turn around and find Yeonjun standing in front of the toy store. He’s staring down at a table that’s filled with a mix of toys. You tilt your head, curious about what caught his eye.

“Is there something you want?”

He remains quiet.

You look down, there’s one particular toy that stands out to you, which could explain why he stopped. You pick up a box with a doll of the BTS member, V, inside. The plastic cover has been battered up, and the doll’s hair is a mess. The limbs are sprawled in directions that a human bones can’t replicate. All in all, it’s a pitiful sight to bear, but what makes it even more tragic is that this outdoor table is for toys that are on discount.

“I remember when the dolls were announced, everyone went crazy for it.” Yeonjun comments.

He was still a trainee at that time, but he already knew about it before the public did. You did too, but you didn’t think too much about it since nearly everything related to BTS becomes impactful to the world.

“But…look at where it is now. It has its quirks in the beginning, but after a while, this doll will never compare to the real person. It’s a temporary escape from the reality that you’ll never get to be with the real V-sunbaenim.”

The way he words it…is so depressing. This is unlike Yeonjun to be spilling poetic lines. You stare at the doll, and the doll glares back at you. You wonder what the doll’s journey was like, from factory to this clearance table.

“It’s just a doll. I’m sure it’ll find an owner,” you assure him. “Let’s hurry back before they get upset.”

He turns to you as if you offended him, not the doll. But he looks away with a troubled look, ultimately plastering a nonconsensual smile. You know you said something wrong, but you don’t know what it is.

“Manager…” Yeonjun calls out.

“Yea?”

“…I’m…different from V-sunbaenim, right?”

This isn’t a hard question, and yet you’re having a hard time answering it. It’s because if you answer either ‘yes’ or ‘no’, they both carry heavy context behind them. It’s plainly obvious how Yeonjun will feel if you say ‘no’, but saying ‘yes’ would also feel shallow depending on the tone. In this situation, how do you answer?

“…You’re fine just the way you are.” You say it with a tone as plain as cardboard.

You can’t decipher his expression, and it worries you more. It’s like you nailed the coffin perfectly and just made his mood worse.

Without putting much thought into it, you take him by his hand, holding it tightly. He’s confused, but you muster a smile. “Come on, stay close so that we don’t separate. You’re the one carrying Soobin’s snacks. He’ll cry if we lose it.”

You drag him along with you. As you walk forward with him in hand, you make quick glances behind to check on him. His sullen expression still remains, and it makes you all the more conflicted. You don’t know exactly what’s going on in his head, but you’re too afraid to ask, thinking that he might just brush off your worries as meaningless thinking.

==========

“Kai, don’t cry.” Soobin pats him on the back.

Occupying a private dance room in Los Angeles, Huening Kai is sitting in a fetal position, wiping his eyes with his hands. Soobin and Taehyun are on their knees, one person on each side. You sit in front of him, thinking of ways to encourage him.

“You’re overreacting. You did everything fine.” Taehyun adds on.

“I can’t dance. I’m really bad at it.” He mutters to himself.

“Have some water and let’s be chirpy again!” Beomgyu kneels down and passes him a bottle of water, but he doesn’t accept it.

“I shouldn’t have tried to become an idol. I don’t like, I hate this. I don’t want to do this anymore.”

“Huening Kai, don’t say that,” You put your hands over his. “You’re doing great.”

But it doesn’t seem like your message has crossed over. It’s understandable that Huening Kai gets into moods like this, especially being under immense pressure despite only living fifteen years of his life. To be so young yet feel defeated makes your eyes water.

Standing on the other side of the room is Yeonjun, still rehearsing. You’re a little annoyed that he more interested in himself than Huening Kai. You give him dagger eyes, waiting for him to do something, but nothing happens.

“Yeonjun, can’t you at least take your eyes off of yourself for a second?” You pout.

“Manager, don’t…! It’s okay!” Huening Kai begs.

He finally turns to your direction, staring back at you as you glare. He scratches the back of his head, approaching Huening Kai until he crouches in front of him.

“If this is too much for you, then why don’t you just quit?”

Huening Kai gasps, and so does the rest of you. You have the urge to smack him across the face, wondering how he could ask that question when Kai is already at his lowest.

“I don’t want to…”

“Why? You’re the one who keeps complaining about how hard it is.”

Huening Kai looks conflicted, like his words are biting back at him.

“Yeonjun, don’t—”

But Soobin stops you by putting his hand on your shoulder. While you don’t know what’s going on, it seems like the rest of the boys do.

“I don’t want to quit.”

Yeonjun’s serious expression then switches that of an upbeat grin. He pats him on the back, pulling him for a neck hug.

“You say that you want to quit, but deep down, you want to keep going. The moment negative thoughts start passing through your head, shut them out immediately and start finding compliments for yourself.”

“But…that’s a bit self-serving…”

He shakes his head. “Conceited people compliment themselves as a means of building a wall to avoid their ego from being hurt. Confident people are so confident in themselves that they want others to succeed too. Come on, let’s keep practicing. Show me what you need help with and I’ll do my best to help.”

“Me too!” Soobin raises his hand.

“I’ll take part too.” Taehyun adds.

“Hey! Don’t leave me out either!” Beomgyu shouts.

These boys will never stop amazing you, but it also makes you feel bad. You feel like you didn’t do anything, and Yeonjun, once again, knows what to say and do. It makes you feel insecure—like you’re not cut out for the job. Once again, it’s Yeonjun overpowering someone’s abilities.

And despite disliking it, you can’t help but see Yeonjun in a more positive light. You thought that he didn’t care about the other members, but it doesn’t seem like the case all the time.

==========

You’re in the van with the rest of the boys and the driver. This time, they’re dressed in more formal attire, wearing suits. You’re glad that Yeonjun is a little more confident in himself now that he’s wearing what he wanted, but there’s still that lingering sense of gloom that floats around him.

The driver is playing songs on the radio while the boys are busy playing on their phones. Many overplayed songs play on the radio, some that you are still in love with and others where you’re getting sick of.

BTS’s song plays, and already, you can sense Yeonjun feeling uncomfortable. His raises his shoulders, scratching his head more than usual. You can see his distraught being played in the rear-view mirror.

“Excuse me, can you turn off the radio?”

“Oh yea, sure.” He turns it off.

You look back in the mirror, and he’s look like he’s fine, though a little disturbed. He clears his throat, looking at the reflection in his mirror and fixing his hair. Every time the driver hits a bump, Yeonjun would look at his phone’s camera’s portrait mode to fix his hair.

 Drawing near the red carpet, the boys get ready to prepare for their walk. They can already hear hundreds of screams, and it only gets louder as they get closer. They check themselves one last time, making sure that every detail is perfect. Through the windows, there are fans screaming and waving at them.

“Alright, good luck, guys! Go make the crowd go wild!” You cheer them on.

They cheer back right as the car parks. In an instant, they shut their mouths, preparing for flashing lights from cameras and the nonsensical screams. They come out one by one, and you wait until they’ve walked enough so that you can enter. You don’t like being in the spotlight, so you rather distance yourself from situations such as these.

Just as planned, the boys stride through the red carpet professionally, waving and throwing finger hearts at fans. Once the crowd turn their heads away from your direction, you speed out of the car, wearing your face mask and parka to hide your identity. You speed to the backdrop where the five boys stand and pose for the hosts of the red carpet.

Behind the photo scene, you watch from behind as a barrage of camera flashes blind your vision. You can barely make shape of the members’ bodies. Judging how the situation is going, they seem to be handling it well. This isn’t the first time they were in front of this many cameras on a carpet walkway, so it’s not surprising that they’re doing well on their own.

“As BTS’s juniors, they’re doing amazing by breaking records of their own and standing out internationally, as well as in Korea. Coming back to the spotlight after two delays of their comeback, they returned with their first full-length album The Dream Chapter: Magic. It’s extremely rare that a rookie group is able to release a full album so soon, so they have a lot to show their fans. And speaking of fans, please pose for them, Tomorrow by Together!” The male host announces.

And doing what they’re told, they immediately start posing, raising their hands up to make hearts. They tilt their heads, some of them smiling and others, like Beomgyu and Yeonjun, making serious expressions. Fans are cheering for them, jumping and waving their hands at them but also hiding their faces behind cameras larger than their heads. They even have built-in lenses that are so large that it makes the cameras look like telescopes.

“Is there anything you would like to tell your fans?” The male host passes the microphone to Yeonjun.

He takes it, waving before taking a second to think about what he wants to say. “First of all, thank you to the MOAs who have been supporting us with our newest title track, 9 and Three Quarters. We worked very hard and put all our passion into each song in the album, so we would really appreciate it if every one of you also sup—”

Suddenly, someone throws an egg at Yeonjun, aimed perfectly at his head. The shell cracks into a million pieces, the raw components splattering all over his face. While the crowd gasps in horror, Yeonjun is in complete shock. During their years of training to deal with not only being exposed to passionate fans but also hate groups.

Among the crowd is a woman wearing sunglasses, a face mask, and a black beanie. She’s wearing all in black and is holding a carton of eggs in her arms.

“YOU’RE A PARASITE TO BTS. YOU LEECH OFF OF THEM TO MAKE EFFORTLESS CASH. THEY WORKED SO HARD ONLY FOR YOU TO TAKE IT AWAY. YOU DIDN’T DESERVE ROOKIE OF THE YEAR AWARD. YOU’RE ALL FUCKING SCUM AND DESERVE TO DIE IN A SHITHOLE.”

She grabs more eggs to throw at Yeonjun. Bodyguards are sprinting toward her, but with so many people in the way, it’s taking longer to get to her. The staff from behind the backdrop, including you, are rushing onto the scene to grab the boys. But Yeonjun is furthest away from the exit, and the host next to him has ran off. In a state of panic, the staff and guards can only think about saving the idols who are closest to them, but no one is running to Yeonjun.

He’s frozen in shock, still processing what just happened as the egg whites drip from his hair. Even though everything is moving fast, it’s like time has slowed down, giving you milliseconds to think about your next moves. But some of her eggs fail to reach Yeonjun like the first attempt. With the guards tailing in on her, she dashes toward him, grabbing a fan’s large, expensive camera, lunging it back and readying it to hit Yeonjun with it.

Then that’s when Yeonjun’s bright, loving smile flashes through your mind. You thought about all the times you’ve spent with him laughing, playing games, and eating junk food with him. He used to be so happy, and it made your chest warm when you saw him in love with being an idol.

So…when did it start falling apart?

And the last frame in your mind was the first time you’ve ever seen him cry. All alone and on the ground, begging for his stress to go away. He repeats over and over that he wants to give up—the same trainee that was ranked number one, the same guy who everyone dismisses his five years of brutal training as ‘his seniors’ privileged little brother’, the same boy who you disliked because you made an assumption about him before you got to know him.

The next thing you know, you’re standing in between Yeonjun and the camera that the woman has thrown. In that brief moment, you and Yeonjun make eye contact. He looks so scared, like a child who’s been traumatized. But you don’t want him to keep making that face, so in the midst of the chaos, you smile, letting him know that everything will be alright.

Then your vision turns black.

==========

You clasp onto the door frame, your mouth hanging open. You thought you heard Yeonjun wrong. This is the same guy who you thought that he’s full of himself. But to see him on the ground, crying his eyes out, it was like reality hitting you really hard that trainee life can take a toll even on the most gifted of trainees, even Yeonjun.

“What did you say?” Unbeknownst to you, there was another person in the room. It’s their main choreography coach. “You’re quitting? You’re more pathetic than I thought.”

His coach crouches, knocking on Yeonjun’s head harshly.

“You’re so full of yourself that you’ve forgotten how much you’re a fucking sore eye to watch when you dance. Your feet and back is hurting? Bullshit. Those are excuses that quitters make. You think you can keep being number one with that mindset?”

How have you’ve never seen this up until now? How can this crude man be considered a coach?

“I’m sorry, I won’t say it again.” Yeonjun mutters as he sniffs, but he hasn’t stopped crying.

“Might as well make Taehyun number one. He’s doing great and he doesn’t whine like you. And he’s pretty young, too. He’ll top you in no time, and you’ll be last because you’re incompetent.”

Even bringing up the other members makes you sick. There’s something twisted about how he puts down Yeonjun’s spirit by comparing him to the other boys. While competition is great, this is just outright creating unnecessary rivalry. It now makes sense why Yeonjun distanced himself from the other boys; it was the work of this man. He made him fear his own teammates.

“Sitting around and shitting yourself isn’t going to make you a better dancer. Get the fuck up and keep practicing.”

But Yeonjun is hesitant to get up which irritates the coach.

“What are you still doing? Get. Up.”

“But…sir…it’s almost lunch time. The other members are back in the room…and they’re waiting for me.”

“Do I hear a goddamn wimp talking again?”

He immediately shakes his head. “No.”

“Then get up and stop crying. I’ll let you eat when you’ve finished thinking about what you did wrong. Besides…” he pinches Yeonjun’s cheeks. “No girl wants a guy who has fat on their face.”

He swipes Yeonjun’s face away, getting up and stomping out of the room. In the brink of time, you were able to hide behind the door while he walks out. He does what he’s told and gets up, and you cover your mouth when you realize the horror that’s been going on behind the scenes.

You can’t just hide. You want to talk to him, you want to know if he’s okay. If this is how their coach treats Yeonjun, you can’t imagine what he does to the other members.

You peek your head into the room, seeing as he’s already returns to dancing. He’s rubbing his feet and back like it’s in pain. You never noticed this before, but he has a lot of scars and burises on his arms and legs, most likely from excessive practicing. Some are old, some are new. He’s always worn long sleeves during practice and filming, at least long enough to hide them.

However, you’ve been staring for too long that you catch Yeonjun’s attention. You both are startled, but Yeonjun immediately wipes his eyes to hide his wet eyes.

“Wh-what are you doing here? I thought you were with the rest.”

You shake your head. “I came here to let you know that we’re going to get lunch.”

“It’s okay, I’m not hungry.”

You curl your lips inward, trying to fight the urge to cry. You don’t want to make it seem like you eavesdropped, but it’s too late.

“You…heard everything, didn’t you?”

You don’t reply.

“Ah…so embarrassing…”

“I’m…sorry.” You murmur.

“What?”

“I didn’t know.”

You step forward, falling into Yeonjun’s arms. He’s confused, trying to push you away, but you won’t let him.

“What are you sorry for?”

You’re not sorry for listening to their conversation. You’re sorry for making the wrong assumption about him. Because of that, you deemed him as the villain who only wants to win for himself. You feel immensely guilty for pushing him aside without putting much thought. But now looking back, you were wrong for making up thoughts based on how he acted and look.

“I’ll do everything in my power to make sure that that coach is fired.”

“Wh-what…? You don’t have to.”

“No! I have to! I don’t want you to debut with that way of thinking! You’re better than what he makes you to be.”

He’s at a loss of words. He’s hesitant about putting his arms around you, but he ultimately does it. His hands are shaking so much, and you aren’t sure if it’s because of malnourishment from extreme dieting or if he’s scared.

“I’m okay…really…” Yeonjun chuckles as he fails to fight back his tears. “I’m okay…I’m fine. I’m fine…I’m…okay…I’m…not…”

He starts crying louder and louder, though not too loud so the coach can hear. He lowers his back, though slowly because his spine is in excruciating pain from so much dancing. He buries his face into your shoulder, sobbing. He clutches onto the back of your shirt, not wanting to let go of this warmth. You can tell by how awkward he wraps his arms around you that he doesn’t hug that often.

Those years of pressure to keep up with his reputation is catching up to him. Everyone may think he’s a super trainee who will undoubtedly succeed, but at the end of the day, he’s still a trainee. You may never fully know what he exactly endured, but imagine five years, 1,825 days, that he had to suffer thinking that he’ll never debut. His naïve dreams of inspiring others with his performances slowly diminishing as time went by, fleeting into dust when he realizes that he may never debut.

That’s why he’s so conceited—hiding away his anxiety and fears of never being able to show the world those five years of torturous training. He built himself up so high because he wanted to believe that he’ll make it, and he wanted to convince others of that too because he never truly did. In the darkness, he was scared that the scars he received, the mental beatings, and the physical pains were for nothing. After all, a narcissistic person tries to hide his flaws rather than having enough confidence to help others.

He was so deep in his vicious thoughts that he forgot what it was like to be comforted. That’s probably why he’s holding onto you so tightly, because he’s afraid that he won’t have another chance to feel this vulnerable. What started as a rocky relationship, he became your harsh reality of the music industry, but you have become his therapy.

But this escape-therapy can only go so far.

==========

You regain consciousness, and the first thing you see is a white ceiling. You hear a monitor beating to your side. You turn your head, seeing the four boys sitting next to you. They’re all frozen, like they can’t believe that you’re awake.

“MANAGER!! I…! You…! Alive!!” Soobin bursts into tears.

He throws himself onto you, losing your breath because of his heavy weight pressing against your chest. Your heart rate increases on the motor, so Huening Kai immediately pulls him off of you.

“Are you trying to kill her?!”

“I’m…I’m…I’m…just so happy!” He’s like a broken faucet that can’t stop crying.

Beomgyu and Taehyun are also crying, though Taehyun tries to hide it with his hand. It doesn’t help when you can see his tears landing on his lap.

“How are you feeling?!” Beomgyu asks.

“I’m…so sleepy…Where am I?” You try getting up.

But Huening Kai pushes your shoulders back down. “Don’t get up! You need all the rest you can get.”

After wiping the tears away, Taehyun clears his throat. “A criminal threw a camera at Yeonjun-hyung, but you managed to get in between, but you ended up getting hurt and got an injury to the head.”

“Calling her a criminal is a bit too much…” Huening Kai states.

“Too much or not, she still committed a crime because she had intent on harming us, especially our hyung. If we weren’t in public, then I would’ve done anything to stop her. But my ideas would’ve sent me to prison.”

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“IDIOT!!!” Beomgyu shouts suddenly.

His loud voice startles you, creating a spike in your heartbeat monitor. You’re jokingly beginning to think that them being in the room with you is going to do more harm to your body.

“Why did you try to tried acting like a hero?! During times like that, you have to save yourself!!” He keeps on crying and let his nose run.

Honestly, you don’t know either. Your feet moved on its own, and your only goal was to ensure Yeonjun’s safety. And speaking of Yeonjun, he’s nowhere to be found.

“Where’s Yeonjun?”

“Yeonjun-hyung…he…” Huening Kai pauses.

“Hyung is back at the dorms. Because of the assault, we had to temporarily pause activity in the meantime. We were also checked and we’re fine.”

“But Hyung…” Beomgyu trails off.

Your heart drops, fearing for the worse.

“He—”

“He was just a little startled,” Taehyun continues. “He’s taking a break in the dorms right now.”

You sigh in relief. The anticipation was really killing you. It makes sense that he’s still a little shaken up because the threat was aimed toward him, after all. But despite the assurance, you can’t help but worry.

“Is it okay to leave him by himself…?” You ask.

“We were just about to leave to check on him. We’ll let the nurses know that you woke up and we’ll be on our way. We’ll text you if something comes up.” Taehyun says.

Soobin, who’s still riddled with tears, places his hands over yours. “Manager, please eat a lot. Call us immediately if something happens. Text us through Kakao, but if you absolutely have to, then use our actual phone number. Don’t try to do anything on your own and have the nurses assist you. And I know how much you stress out about us, so every morning, afternoon, and evening, I’m going to remind you not to worry. If it makes you feel better, I’ll leave voicemails about what each of us did for that day too. Here, I’ll set up three alarm clocks to remind myself to text you every day.”

Right as he whips his phone out, you raise your hand up to stop him. “N-no, it’s okay.”

“Okay, we’ll be leaving.” Huening Kai winks at you.

“Call me when you guys make it back to the dorms.”

“Yes, yes worry-wart.”

==========

“Why did you lie to her?!” Beomgyu shouts.

“I didn’t want to lie, but I thought it was better that way,” Taehyun crosses his arms.

“But she’s already concerned for Hyung as it is. Lying won’t make it any better!!” Beomgyu’s loud voice draws attention.

Panicked, Soobin shushes him. “Beomgyu, please! People are staring.”

“You do realize that if we tell her, then all she’s ever gonna try and do is sneak out of the hospital and look for him on his own, right? She won’t listen to us if we still that Hyung still comes home every night.”

“But…he’s gone all day, and we don’t know where he goes. We’ve already tried talking to him, but he won’t listen to us!!”

“I think Taehyun’s right,” Huening Kai raises his hand. “At least for now, we should at least keep it a secret until she’s recovered. It’ll just stress her out even more if we tell her now.”

“I agree with the both of them.” Soobin also votes.

Beomgyu looks at the three of them, unable to believe they would continue with this falsity. However, they do have a point. Your stress levels have definitely spiked ever since their comeback, and adding more to that isn’t going to make you rest, but freak out more.

“Al…alright. But we have to tell her soon!”

“Yes, we will,” Taehyun says. “Just. Don’t. Tell. Her.”

He warns all of them, but particularly at Beomgyu. Even though Taehyun says that, he has a strong feeling that Beomgyu will give in to the weight.

==========

Thankfully, the injury to your head isn’t that serious. For the next two days, you remain in the hospital to double check that you can function properly without any disruptions to your brain.

Unsurprisingly, the attack became international news. Accusations were placed everywhere, with fans blaming the awards ceremony for not having high security. Even though fan outrage is to be expected, getting angry over it can’t undo what has already happened. In your opinion, you wish that rather than focusing their attention toward blaming the ceremony, they should be more focused on the wellbeing of the boys. Thankfully, there are fans who worry more about them than award show functionality.

For the last two days, the boys have been taking a short hiatus. They can’t even enter the Big Hit building because there are so many journalists crowding at every entrance. To the best of your luck, Big Hit has never publically shared which hospital you’re staying at, so there are no journalists anywhere here. It makes it easier for the members to visit you during their free time.

Just as Soobin promised, he’s been updating you about the boys. They seem to be doing well, even sending you an entire essay about each member in exquisite detail, with the exception of Yeonjun. For him, Soobin would keep it very vague, and it doesn’t make matters any better when Yeonjun’s the only person who hasn’t visited you. They keep telling you that he’s fine, but you want to see it for yourself.

 “Yay! You’re leaving tomorrow morning!” Beomgyu claps his hands.

Today, it’s only Beomgyu who came. Huening Kai and Taehyun had to stay after school to make up a few tests that they missed, and Soobin had already visited you in the morning. Beomgyu is still in his school uniform and he brought some candy for you snack on.

“Yea, I feel like I was going insane being cooped up in this room all day. I guess it’s true that when you see the color white all the time, it makes you go crazy.” You laugh.

“But just because you leave the hospital doesn’t mean that you should go back to your usual routine. Take things slowly. I can play as the manager while you heal!” Beomgyu points to himself with his thumb.

“Uh…it’s okay. If you’re the manager, then the group is going to be in shambles within weeks,” you elbow him. “I’m just kidding. Thanks for volunteering to do that though. That’s mature of you to take responsibility.”

“Anything for you.” Beomgyu holds your hand and sways it up and down as he giggles.

He lets go of your hand then looks out the window, exhaling carbon. The skies are covered with gray clouds.

“Ah…I hope the sky becomes happier when you leave. I want the entire world to be happy when you get out!”

You chuckle. “That’s so adorable. Thank you.”

“But I do hope that this bad weather makes the news reporters just leave was alone. They’ve been camping out in front of the building.”

“Oh yea, on the same topic as that, no one’s been harassing you guys about the whole ordeal, right?”

He shakes his head. “These big scary guards have been protecting us, so we’ve been protected very well.”

“And how’s Yeonjun?”

Beomgyu freezes. You wait for him to reply, but when he takes longer than he should, that’s when you realize that something’s going on.

“…He is doing fine…right?”

“Ye…yea…! He is! He’s terrific, fine, excellent, phenomenal, exuberant!”

But you aren’t convinced. “Beomgyu, don’t lie to me.”

“I-I’m not lying!” He laughs nervously. “Why would I lie to you?”

“Please, tell me the truth.”

With your serious yet calmly desperate tone, he can’t hide it anymore. After a few days of keeping it a secret, he has to tell you. “Hyung has been going out a lot. We don’t know where he goes, but when we ask, he won’t tell us. When he does come home, he goes straight to bed and sleeps until he gets up and repeats.”

“What? Are you telling me that he goes by himself with no guards?”

“W-well…”

“Is he out right now?”

“I don’t know…I think so?”

You throw the blanket off of yourself, moving your legs off of the bed before Beomgyu places his hands on your shoulders to prevent you from getting out. “What are you doing??”

“I’m gonna go look check on him.”

“Are you nuts?! You haven’t been discharged yet, and you’re leaving?!”

“Yes, so let me go.”

“I can’t! Agh…I knew I shouldn’t have said anything. Manager, please don’t try and go. We’re all worried as it is.”

“What?”

“Taehyun told me that we should keep it a secret from you because we want you to rest. We’re already troubled having to find Yeonjun-hyung, and we’ll just get even more worried if you push your body.”

You paid so much attention on Yeonjun that you pushed the other boys aside. The pained expression on Beomgyu’s face says it all—the situation that both you and Yeonjun are in is taking a toll on them too. They may act like it isn’t bothering them when it clearly is; they’re trying their best to do what they can.

You put your legs back under the blanket begrudgingly. “Okay…I’m sorry, Beomgyu.”

He sighs in relief, glad that Taehyun won’t have to get upset. “Is there anything I can do for you? I have to go back to the dorms after.”

“No, I’m good. You can go now. Thanks for stopping by and giving me candy. I don’t think I can last another meal with hospital food.” You laugh.

Although you’re trying to lighten the mood, Beomgyu can sense that you’re still troubled. He pretends like he didn’t notice and forces an obvious fake laugh.

“O…okay. Please text us if you need anything. I’ll be going now.”

Beomgyu leaves and closes the door. Now alone, you think about what to do. Sneaking out of the hospital isn’t going to make things better, even though you really want to. For now, you can only wait until you’re discharged from the hospital.

Or…that’s what they want you to think. Your instincts tell you that if you don’t do something right now, then you’re going to regret it.

==========

“WHAT?!”

Soobin shushes Beomgyu.

“Mi-mi-mi-missing?! What are we gonna do?! Does Taehyun and Huening Kai know about this?? A-and, Manager, she—”

“Seriously, calm down, Beomgyu! They don’t know about it. I think it’s better not to tell them until they come back. As for Manager…I don’t know.”

“We have to let her know!” Beomgyu takes his phone out. “I literally told her that he’s fine!”

“W-wait, let’s think about it first.”

“That’s what we’ve been doing! We kept thinking about it that it drove Yeonjun to go missing!!”

As the leader, Soobin is trying to remain calm, but inside, he doesn’t know what to do either. He feels awful that he kept this hidden from you. However, making you panic isn’t going to make things better either.

He thought about calling the police, but with the media already on their tails, he doesn’t want to cause more trouble and create an even bigger scene.

“I’m going to tell Manager.” Beomgyu dials your phone number.

“Beomgyu—”

“What?! Are you going to tell me to keep it on the down low again?! Sorry, Hyung, but I can’t. I don’t want to keep hiding from each other anymore. I don’t want to disappoint her again.”

Soobin is hesitant, but Beomgyu is right. “…Okay, you call her and I’ll let the younger two know,” he looks out the window, seeing as it started raining. “I just hope Hyung is safe…”

Beomgyu lets his phone ring for a while. After five rings, that’s when he knew that there’s something going on with you. Whenever it’s one of the boys who’s calling, you would pick up immediately unless there was an emergency. And since you’re not picking up your phone…

“H-Hyung…she’s not picking up. Wh-what should we do?!”

==========

You don’t know how, but you miraculously escaped the hospital. Thankfully, the members left some of your sweaters for you in case you got cold, so you were able to hide your patient uniform and leave without anybody noticing. Your hospital bed doesn’t have an alarm, so you were able to get up without having to alert the nurses.

But what you didn’t have was an umbrella. Within seconds in the rain, you’re soaked. And even though you set out in search of Yeonjun, you don’t know where to start. You left your phone in the hospital, so there’s no way you get contact him—that is if he doesn’t ignore your calls or messages.

With the day drawing towards its end, the skies grow darker with the clouds raining heavier. Less people are on the streets, only drunkards waddling back to their homes and college students coming back from restaurants.

You run around the city, passing through citizens who may look like him but to your dismay, he isn’t any of them. From head to toe, you’re drenched. Even your slippers are too wet to keep your feet dry. With each footstep, the pressure put onto the slipper squeezes some water out, only for it to soak up more.

You want to call his name, but you’re afraid that by doing so, it’ll call attention. While he may have dyed his hair blue, he is most likely hiding it to avoid being recognized. Everything is playing against you, and it makes you agonize in your lonesome worries—that you’ll probably won’t be able to find him.

It pains you to think about all this might’ve been avoidable. Maybe if you didn’t push aside his problems, then this wouldn’t have happened. Of course, the attack at the red carpet was unforeseeable, but perhaps the smallest of decisions before that might’ve changed some decisions.

And looking back in the past, to trace your steps to the places you’ve been with him. It might be pointless, but it’s the best you can do. Standing at the dead center of the sidewalk, you scour through your memories, from the convenience store to the variety shows. Of all places, there was one place that stood out to you. It might’ve have very little significance at the time, but after putting everything together, it oddly makes sense. With a destination in mind, you run.

==========

At the toy store, it’s long since been closed for the day, but just as you thought, Yeonjun is there. You’re overwhelmed with an array of emotions, relieved that he’s okay but also concerned to see him just as wet as you. He’s crouching next to a trash bin next to the store like he’s inspecting something.

“Yeon…!” You stop yourself before calling his name.

But he heard you clearly. He can recognize your voice from a mile away, but he doesn’t react whatsoever. It’s only when you stand behind him when he turns around. Even though it’s the same person, his eyes have bags underneath. His hair is a mess, matted to his forehead from the rain. His nose, cheeks, and ears are red, but is skin and lips have lost color. When you trace your eyes down to his hands, he’s holding something.

You snap out of your trance, shaking your head then crouching to his level. “What are you doing here?!”

“…(Y/N)?” He mutters a small chuckle. “Ah…I’m hallucinating now. You should be in the hospital.”

Cradled in his hands is the V doll that you two saw days ago. It’s out of its box now, but it has black dirt all over its clothes and face. It has lost some of its plastic hair, revealing a few bald spots with holes.

“Wh-why do you have that? Come on, let’s go.”

You try helping him up, but he refuses to move. He even shoves your hands off of him.

“Hey, (Y/N). Guess what I just found out?” Yeonjun smiles, though the ends of his lips twitch. “For the past few days, I came here to make sure that someone would buy this poor doll and give it affection. I didn’t want to buy it because I wanted someone else to prove that a doll like this can be loved. Every, single, day, people would pass by this doll and aren’t willing to end its loneliness. And you know what? Just a few hours ago, the owner of the store was clearing out his clearance toys and threw them out, and this doll was one of them.”

He’s talking like a mad man. But his grin slowly twists into a sour expression as he bites his bottom lip.

“It fell out of its box and got dirty. It became nothing more than another piece of trash. And it made me open my eyes: the reason why this doll can’t be loved is because it’s just an imitation of the real V-sunbaenim! There are millions of V copycats, just like this doll, and none of them will ever match his level of superiority. People fall in love with the real V-sunbaenim, not this, so it’s obvious that they want the real one,” he squeezes the doll so tight that the limbs begin to misshapen. “The fake one is just temporary. The fakes are always the ones who are left behind…”

That’s when it hits you; Yeonjun isn’t talking about the millions of factory-made dolls of Taehyung, or any of the other BTS members in that regards.

But himself.

“Ever since our debut, I kept having demented thoughts…I supported my seniors, but deep down…I wanted them to fail. I wanted them see them crash and burn because…the more successful they became, the more pressure that came upon us. And I hate myself for being selfish! But…I’m more scared of disappointing the people…our fans…that I can’t live up to their expectations.”

You’re so shocked that you can’t say anything. All this bottled up emotions has been eating him up, and it’s scaring you.

“If we tried our best, we got hated because they think we’re trying to top our seniors, but if we didn’t live up to their expectations, then we were accused of being privileged and lazy.”

His eyes are turning swollen, and he can’t stop crying. He covers his eyes the palm of his hands, wailing in pain.

“I didn’t become a performer only to continue someone else’s dreams! (Y/N)…I can’t take it anymore…”

No, he’s doing it again.

“I can’t…”

Don’t say it.

“I want to give up—”

“YEONJUN!” You shout from the top of your lungs.

You grab his cheeks, shaking him violently. His face is so icy—so cold that it could give you frostbites. While he’s sitting, you’re standing on your knees, hovering over him small body.

“Get those thoughts out of your head! Don’t ever say that you want to give up! You will make your own mark!! You’re going to go on stage and prove to yourself that you’re not Taehyung from BTS, but Yeonjun from Tomorrow by Together. And…and…”

You can’t hold back your tears either, letting all your emotions out as well.

“I’ll be there…supporting you…Soobin, Beomgyu, Taehyun, and Huening Kai. Because we’re a team, and we help each other out.”

You pull him in for a hug, and his head is nuzzled on your shoulder. When he tries to fight you off of him, you don’t let go.

“They may compare you to Taehyung, and they can hate you for all we care. But you’ll never be Taehyung.”

You pull him back, smiling.

“And he can never be you, either. Just like how there’s only one Kim Taehyung from BTS, there’s only one Choi Yeonjun from TXT, and that’s you.”

His eyes widen, then within seconds, he bursts into tears. He hides his face in your chest, sobbing like a child. He drops the doll to hold onto you. Despite you shivering too, your body gives so much warmth, and he doesn’t want to let go.

Having to grow up into the cruelty known as the entertainment world where the agencies and audience has the right to control their lives, Yeonjun could never cry in pain. His fears hold him back from ever revealing his vulnerable side because he’s the ‘number one trainee of Big Hit’. A title so high like that, he had to pretend to be a man who can stand tall. But…as time went by, it broke him bit by bit. He was constantly compared and belittled, and it hurt him more than anyone could ever imagine.

“(Y/N)…I don’t want to let go. I’m scared…I’m scared of the world, myself, everything.”

“It’s okay…don’t worry.”

“I don’t hate my seniors…I don’t hate our fans…I just hate…how the world works.”

“Don’t beat yourself up anymore. You don’t have to be so hard on yourself. You deserve to eat whatever you want, dress however you want, and be the person you want to be. They can judge you, but they can’t define you. Now, let’s go back home.”

==========

Many hours later back in the dorms, the four members are standing by the bedroom door. They want to check, but they don’t want to disrupt you and Yeonjun. You two have been in there for hours. But even with the warnings of the other members, Beomgyu is antsy.

“Why can’t I just look?”

“No! They’re probably tired and just want to be left alone.” Soobin steps in between Beomgyu and the door.

Beomgyu groans. “Those two have been doing crazy things, and I can’t take a break.”

“Lower your voice. They’re most likely sleeping.” Taehyun shushes.

“…Okay…” he sighs. “But just a peek.”

Beomgyu steps around Soobin and tries to open the door.

“No!” Huening Kai pulls him away. “It’s forbidden to intervene in such an intimate moment.”

“…You calling it ‘intimate’ is just making me even more nervous! What if Yeonjun-hyung is, you know, doing things to her?!”

“They both came back to the dorms drenched in rain, potentially sick from being exposed to germs, and that’s what you’re worried about?” Taehyun raises an eyebrow.

“Manager has been in the bedroom for a long time…” Soobin plays with his fingers. “Who would’ve ever thought that they had an awkward relationship from the beginning?”

“Eh? They did?” Beomgyu asks, oblivious.

“Of course. They wanted nothing to do with each other. I don’t know when, but they became friends out of nowhere.”

“It’s even weirder that Yeonjun-hyung didn’t like her at first, but look at him now,” Taehyun crosses his arms. “He’s completely infatuated with her.”

Beomgyu stares at the boys, wide-eyed. “…WHAT?! Ye-Ye-Yeonjun-hyung l-l-likes Manager?! Since when?!”

“You couldn’t tell?” Huening Kai laughs. “He makes it very obvious. There are times when he becomes a vicious wolf when we hog her too much…”

“Manager probably likes him too.” Taehyun adds.

“What…?” Beomgyu looks baffled and disappointed, like he just lost a battle.

“I wouldn’t be surprised…” Kai drags his sentence. “Yeonjun-hyung does have that air of maturity. She probably wants someone like him.”

“…I’m an adult too.” Soobin mutters under his breath.

“I do hope that Yeonjun-hyung does realize that not everybody hates us,” Taehyun turns on his phone, sliding through pages of articles. “We have fans who care about us too. V-sunbaenim also sent us a message in the group chat, asking if we’re okay. He said that he’s even willing to cancel their activity in the U.S. just to visit us…”

“All of our seniors are worried about us. They do treat us too good.” Huening Kai chuckles nervously.

“Oh, I know!” Soobin jumps excitedly. “Before he wakes up, let’s compile all the supportive comments that we’ve received during our hiatus, including some from BTS-sunbaenim.”

“He’s going to cry for sure. There’s so much support from our fans that we can’t count. But…every voice matters, and I kind of want to do that.” Taehyun blushes slightly.

“Yea, yea, let’s do it!!!!” Soobin grabs ahold of Huening Kai and swings him back and forth.

“Gah! Hyung, let me go!!”

==========

Even though the boys are trying to leave you and Yeonjun alone to rest, they’re doing a poor job at it. You’ve been trying to fall asleep, but with their loud voices, it’s nearly impossible. However, you can’t help but find it endearing, disliking them is even more impossible.

You’ve been sitting by Yeonjun’s bed, having changed out of your patient uniform and into clothes that Soobin rushed to buy just for you. Yeonjun has been sleeping since he was showing signs of a fever. The entire time, he wouldn’t let go of your hand, and you’ve been holding it since.

When you look at him, Yeonjun has been awake for a while, but you don’t know when he woke up. He’s on his phone, scrolling through his feed.

“Oh, you’re not sleeping?”

He shakes his head. “How am I supposed to sleep with all the ruckus?”

You snicker. “True. I’m sure they’re just worried.”

“Yea, and I feel bad.”

“Hey, no need to feel bad,” You hold onto his hand tighter.

He gazes at you with gentle eyes, brushing your hair behind your ears. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m better than ever.”

“No fever?”

Yeonjun presses his knuckles against your forehead. As he leans a little closer, it makes you timid with how intense his stare is. It’s too much that you had to pull yourself away.

“How are you feeling?” You avert your eyes, scratching your forehead.

“Well…I’m dying.”

“What?! Wh-what should I do? Ah…we have to go to the hospital. Where’s my phone???”

“I’m dying of embarrassment. I can’t believe I broke down in front of you again.”

You’re still before it finally hits you that it was somewhat of a joke. “Jesus Christ, Yeonjun! You scared me!”

“Seriously! My pride’s been ruined, and now I don’t think I can ever recover. I vowed that I would never appear weak in front of you again.”

You chuckle. “What’s wrong with that? We’re all human.”

“Yea but…it makes it seem needy. I want to be able to take care of you too.”

“You’ve done enough for me too.”

“Going to the store with you doesn’t count.”

“It counts to me!”

“No,” he sets his phone down, cupping your cheek so you can look at him.

With that brief eye contact, it’s already enough to make you all worked up. Your heartbeat becomes rapid, and your anxiousness has risen. You try to turn away, but he doesn’t allow you to do so, turning your head back to him.

“I’m going to prove that I’m not who the media thinks I am, some innocent boy. Don’t forget that I’m twenty-one. There are things that I crave too, you know?”

“L-like what?”

Take smirks. “Take a guess.”

He brings his face closer to yours. You flinch, but you don’t fight it. Your face turns as red as a tomato, so embarrassed that you can’t look at him in the face. He loves seeing you flustered because, for once, it seems like you’re able to see him as a man, not a child.

“Yeonjun…the boys are in the living room. We…we shouldn’t…”

“Let them catch us.”

“Wh-what??”

“If you’re so worried about them, then I’ll stop.”

But you’re hesitant, clearly expressing that you don’t want to turn him down. It makes Yeonjun smirk.

“They already know that I called dibs on you a long time ago.”

“L-long time ago?!” You give him a surprised look. “Since when—”

And without warning, Yeonjun presses his lips against yours. His eyes are closed, the soft sensation of his lips create fireworks in your chest. There’s no gap in between, your face brushed against his, and while he’s breathing steadily, you hold your breath.

He pulls back slowly, almost wanting to go again but stopping before he can’t control himself. Your entire face has burned up so much that he could’ve sworn he saw steam coming out of your ears. He laughs, finding you absolutely adorable.

“I’ll give my everything to the media, our real fans, and especially you, what I’m made of. I can promise you that.”

It’s been so long since you last saw confidence in his eyes. In fact, you don’t ever recall seeing him as confident as this. He always pulled through challenges with a wink of doubt, never none. As flustered as you are with this sudden kiss, you’re nevertheless happy that he’s found his footing again.

“(Y/N), and I’ll make sure that everybody knows that I like—”

“MANAGER! I’M GOING TO SAVE YOU!!”

Beomgyu’s abrupt shouting startles both you and Yeonjun as he tries to unlock the door. You two can hear Soobin and Huening Kai struggle to get him off the door as the knob twists side to side.

“Is he hurting you!? He is, isn’t he?! I always knew Hyung was a fox in sheep’s clothing!!”

“It’s wolf, not fox!!” Soobin corrects him.

You and Yeonjun look at each other with confused looks, but then it turns into sweet laughter.

You don’t know what the future holds for you and the five boys. This isn’t going to be the last time people will send hate toward them. It hasn’t been long since their debut, so they have a long way before they can show how strong they are. Regardless, each obstacle is a test for them to fight back against those who try to pull them down.

The future may be foggy, but there’s a purpose with why you became their manager. You and the boys have come together with the same dream of touching the hearts of many, reaching for a better tomorrow. They may have their ups and downs, but it’s these flaws that they’ll learn to grow and become a better and more confident version of themselves. They don’t know when the day will come, but for now, they’ll enjoy their journey.

[End]