#my ideal dynamic is them needing to bother each other at every opportunity

[eggcats]

I'm not here to tell anyone how to ship or write anything, obviously, but I've spent the last like 3 days reading nothing but radioapple on ao3 and personally I only like it when they're just a bit toxic and feral at each other, even when they're actually together

If you make them too soft I'm gone, Alastor is in hell for a reason don't make him soft, he needs to bite and drink blood and they need to snark at and try to one up each other at every opportunity

(the excessive use of "luci" too, tbh, sorry but I have such trouble seeing alastor use a nickname tbh)

[missjosie27]

Year 3 Part 1- No Cursed Vaults Allowed

Hey everyone! I’m back with Year 3 for the adventures of my MC! This will feature some new characters including an in depth look at his parents. I have a feeling it will be the best year yet! Enjoy! Comments and feedback welcome!

Summertime was an ideal season for many things, muggle and wizardfolk alike: cookouts, nights out at the pub, parties, celebrations, holidays to the beach, picnics, visitations to relatives, etc. It was just too bad David Grant was given no opportunity to enjoy any of it.

The start of the summer break began badly and only got worse from there. Unlike the end of his first year, there was no hiding the truth of what he had been up to. Some junior reporter managed to get wind of the cursed ice story despite all attempts of the school to lessen its impact. Though he wasn’t mentioned by name, his parents had gone through this nightmare once before and it didn’t take a genius to know their second son indulged in the cursed vaults same as their first born. The result was not pretty.

His mother’s reaction was the most severe- she railed for hours about irresponsibility, jeopardizing his education, the fact she told him not to get up to the same type of foolishness as his brother and what that meant to the family. All the while, David winced and tried to resist covering his ears, though a small woman of only 5’4, her presence was no less intimidating by those who knew her. The piercing blue eyes and mother bear persona was enough to make even the largest man quake in their boots. Which meant he received no help from his dad in that regard.

His father, a man of about six feet with still solidly dark brown hair and a goatee, was not the type to scream and yell but he was the kind of man to take a person aside and issue them a soft but stern warning, which in this case meant wagging his finger and telling him to obey his mother’s wishes.

It was a dynamic that had been going on for four years now going on five. Ever since the disappearance of his older brother both parents took a turn for the worse in their behavior and attitude not only towards him but each other. As opposed to long dinner conversations, the family tended to eat in silence, where long walks in the backyard meadow were once common, David was forbidden from venturing even twenty feet outside the house, where affection and love once dwelled was now replaced by tension and distance.

His parents thought him naïve but the thirteen year old wasn’t stupid. One didn’t need to be a full grown adult to see how fragile things had become. To make matters even worse, all of this tension was redirected back on him. Both of his parents worked, his mother at the tea shop in London, his father in the Office of International Cooperation as the envoy to the United States, but when not occupied with these tasks they focused on him. And the summer of 1986 was filled with reminders about the upcoming year and what he was not to do.

If it wasn’t for his grandfather, Thomas Grant, he might have gone crazy.

“Mum and Dad aren’t happy, Grandad. They don’t do much really. Except feed me and occasionally yell.”

The slender, graying haired man gave a sad chuckle as pulled his grandson close to him.

“They’re going through a rough time now, David. Given the circumstances.”

“But I’m not like Jacob. I didn’t purposefully try to get involved in that vault stuff. It just…sucked me in.”

“I’m willing to bet Jake had a similar story,” Thomas laughed, deep and true. His sense of humor was well known among his family and peers.

“Grandad, I’m serious,” David responded though he couldn’t resist a smile himself. “They’re suffocating. How am I supposed to do anything with them always on my back?”

“There’s always Hogwarts,” came the witty response. When his grandson didn’t laugh this time around, the patriarch of the Grant family turned serious, cupping a finger underneath David’s chin.

“David don’t judge your parents too harshly. Just remember that you aren’t the only one who misses Jake. There must be sufficient time to heal. And when that happens, things will turn around. In the meantime, keep your head up and your ear to the ground.”

The young teenager nodded, knowing that if there was anyone he could trust, it was his grandfather, who often spoke plainly about topics such as these.

“I will.”

“There’s a good lad. Now let’s enjoy more of this summer sunshine shall we, David?”

“David?”

The sound of his mother’s voice brought him back to earth.

“David, are you listening?”

Snapping out of the flashback he quickly replied, “Yes mum.”

“You didn’t promise me,” she warned him as they sat at the table eating breakfast. She had made eggs, sausage, and picked an assortment of fruits but on the eve of going back to school, there was one more lecture to be had.

“Promise that I won’t try to touch the giant squid? Yeah, sure, I can promise that.”

But his attempt at humor was mitigated by a stern look from his father, looking down from his Saturday paper.

“We do not need our second son engaging in this dangerous cursebreaking business,” Heather Grant repeated for the umpteenth time. “It leads to nowhere good. Especially with Jacob gone. Please promise me you will not attempt to find more of these cursed vaults.”

“You’re mother is right, son,” the soft voice of his father echoed. “Your job is to further your education at Hogwarts, make some friends, and meet a few girls along the way,” he added with an uptwitch of his mouth.

“This is a time for you to learn and grow. Not put yourself in needless danger. Listen to your teachers. Listen to Dumbledore. Pay no attention to whatever temptations these vaults might have for you.”

If you had bothered to pay attention to my side of it, you’d remember I don’t CARE what’s inside of the vaults, David thought bitterly. I’m trying to find Jacob so we can be a family again. So YOU don’t have to cry every week about losing your son

In the end, the young teen held his tongue, buried his feelings as he always did on the subject and did as he was told. If it would save his mother that much grief to tell her what she wanted to hear, so be it.

“I promise I will, mum. Cross my heart and swear to die.”

“David!”

“Kidding.”

He was enveloped in an enormous hug, almost causing him to choke on his food.

“We love you, sweetie. Always remember that.”

Even as he acknowledged her words and reciprocated that love, David couldn’t help but feel bitter.

“I love you too.”

In a summary, this was why he hated the summer holidays. Hogwarts couldn’t come soon enough.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The arrival at King’s Crossing couldn’t come soon enough. Using an old Chevrolet that his grandfather collected on his travels in the United States and later passed down to his son, they drove to London on a lovely September day. For David, however, he was just looking forward to getting away from his mother’s smothering influence. Unfortunately, he couldn't get away from her without one last embarrassing hug and kiss on the forehead.

“Stay safe,” she said, as a few sixth years passed by and snickered. David would have hexed them right then and there were his arms not constricted and his wand in his back jeans pocket. “And remember…”

“I know, mum. No cursed vaults.”

“He understands, Heather,” his father spoke up, in a rare moment of support. He also hugged his son and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Be well, David. You know we’re always an owl away if you need us.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

With a last wave and a goodbye, the train whistled, and David hopped on. A sadness permeated through his heart as he looked out of the window one last time at his parents. Their faces were neutral, even distant as they turned and walked away, not even bothering to hold hands or give any sign of affection.

Sighing, the now third year Gryffindor wondered if things would ever return to normal in his family and what it would take to mend the wounds inflicted. In his heart, he already knew the answer. The problem was his parents had already forbidden it.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It didn’t take long for him to find Rowan and grab a compartment. They were later joined by Charlie and Ben as well as Penny, who decided to spend her train ride with the Gryffindor boys this year.

“It’s great to see you again, David!” the pretty blonde greeted him with her usual hug. She did the same with the rest of the crew, causing Ben and Charlie to blush. “How was your summer?”

“Not good,” came the monotone, blunt response. “Unless you count not being allowed twenty feet outside of the house trapped with overbearing parents to be fun.”

Ben hesitated as he tried to formulate the words.

“Did your mum and dad…you know…”

“Find out about the cursed vault? Yes. And I have the Daily Prophet to thank for that. My parents saw the article and they put two and two together. So they know everything and made me promise a million times I would stop associating myself with the vaults.”

“Sounds rough, mate,” Charlie spoke sympathetically. “My mum saw it too but after I told her everything, she was very understanding.”

“Goddamn it, Charlie you told her what we got up to?”

David hadn’t meant to sound upset, but the last thing he needed was for his friends’ parents to think he was an obsessed nutcase as well.

“Dave, give me more credit than that,” the second eldest Weasley said raising his hands in the air. “I didn’t give her any specific details, just the gist. When Bill told her it was because you were trying to find your brother she immediately melted. I think she’s definitely going to send you a sweater this year.”

Not knowing what a sweater had to do with anything, David nevertheless relented.

“Sorry, Charlie. Didn’t mean to bite your head off. Things are just….tense at home. I’m very glad to be going back to Hogwarts.”

“Hey if anyone understands it’s me and Bill,” Charlie chuckled. “There are seven Weasley children in our humble abode. Family disputes are quite common.”

“Speaking of which, where is the lanky tosser?” David smiled. “He usually joins us by now.”

“Funny you should mention that. He’s out fulfilling his new prefect duties. Got the letter just last month. He’s getting himself acquainted in a fancy compartment as we speak.”

“He’s going to make an excellent prefect,” Rowan blurted out excitedly. “The best ever!”

“I suppose he won’t be able to help us out with the vaults anymore given his new position,” Ben suggested sadly. “Prefects enforce the rules, not break them.”

“Don’t be so sure,” Charlie said while munching through a sandwich. “Bill isn’t above breaking a few rules when it suits him. He’s a leader not a tattle tale.”

“That reminds me,” Penny perked up. “Have you given any thought to the broken wand and the book you found?”

That was an interesting question. David had not told his parents about the treasures that lay within the vault and locked them in his trunk to prevent them from being discovered. As to their true purpose, that was still anyone’s guess.

“Of course, I have. They’ve been stored away ever since I found them. But I can’t figure out what they’re for.”

“I wish I had been able to come with you into the vault,” Rowan lamented. “If I had, maybe we would have been able to translate more of that ancient Aramaic on the column. I’ve been doing a lot of research over the summer and I have some theories…”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it,” David assured him. “I’m just not sure we have much to go off of right now.”

“What about Merula?”

He leaned back in his compartment seat, as though wholly unconcerned.

“What about her?”

“You know she’s going to want revenge since you got to the vault before her last year. Not to mention the failed bubotuber prank she tried to pull.”

“Oh yeah, that was funny. Remind me to send her a biting tea cup for her birthday this year.”

“David.”

Rowan’s serious tone forced him to give a serious answer, even though his mind couldn’t be farther from his Slytherin rival.

“She’s going to try and provoke me like she usually does. It’s the best we can hope for. She doesn’t know a damn thing about the vaults and as long as we keep it that way, Merula Snyde won’t be anything more than a minor nuisance in potions class.”

“No offense, David,” Penny warned. “But Merula’s a lot cleverer than you give her credit for. She’s mean, but she isn’t stupid. If any wind of the next vault gets to the Slytherins, she’s going to be the first to jump on it.”

Bollocks, she’s right

David didn’t like to give any credence to any Slytherin, much less Merula but he had to acknowledge that the blonde Hufflepuff brought up a good point. She was not one to give up easily or at all and would not fail to brag about any progress with the vaults or information regarding his brother. He had not taken her up on that offer the previous year but if the flow of intel ran dry, might he have to make a deal with her?

No, never. Merula can piss up a tree for all I care

“I understand your concern, guys. But there’s not a whole lot we can do right now. I don’t even know if I can go after the next vault.

“Can’t? Or won’t?” Ben challenged to his surprise. “Since when does David Grant let rules stop him?”

David didn’t respond, instead choosing to close his eyes and take a small nap before arriving at Hogwarts. Those were questions he preferred not to answer at the moment.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The rest of the train ride was relatively quiet. Penny had to wake up David and Charlie from their respective naps (Charlie also had a habit of snoring) to put on their robes but that aside, it was a peaceful trip without any hijinx.

Heading up to the massive castle was now a familiar routine. The familiar call of ‘Firs’ years’ could be heard above the chatter of the thousand strong student body as he waved a friendly hello to Hagrid who greeted him back. Invisible carriages carried them and their luggage up to the front hall where Peeves was waiting with an assortment of fanged frisbees and had to be cleared away by Professor McGonagall. Yes, being a third year did have one gigantic perk: routine. Being thirteen meant you were no longer a little kid and people showed you a modicum of respect.

They weren’t the only ones moving up in the world. As the respective houses gathered at their tables in the Great Hall, David spotted a familiar long haired, tall red headed Weasley sporting an impressive red and gold badge. It didn’t take long for them to embrace.

“Bill Weasley, you wanker. Can’t make time for us on the train anymore?”

Bill grinned in response.

“For you lot? As if.”

“Seriously, though. Congratulations on becoming prefect. I know you really wanted it last year.”

“Thanks, David,” the eldest Weasley thanked. “Mum practically died of joy when I got the letter. Really, I’m just glad Dumbledore believed I earned it.”

“Just don’t let it get to your head,” Charlie teased him as the group took their seats besides and across from one another. His brother rolled his eyes.

“You know me better than that. Percy on the other hand, God forbid he ever becomes a prefect…”

“Who’s Percy?” Rowan asked, clearly not aware of the numerous siblings the family possessed.

“He’s our younger brother,” Charlie explained. “Younger than Bill and I, but older than Fred, George, Ron, and Ginny. He’s a bit of a wet blanket.”

“He comes to Hogwarts next year. You’ll understand when you meet him,” Bill said, his smile becoming more of a grimace. “By the way, I wanted to ask you sooner, but I couldn’t get away from the prefect training. Did you find any clue or hint about the next vault?”

“Don’t know anything more than you do, I’m afraid,” David said, shaking his head.

“You’re still interested in the vaults even though you’re a prefect?” Rowan asked Bill.

“Hey, just because I’m a prefect doesn’t mean I’ve lost my appetite for curse breaking. I just have to be more…discreet about it from now on.”

Charlie grinned at the rest of his friends as a way to say ‘I told you so’. Ben looked mildly surprised while Rowan was positively aglow with admiration.

“Do you think Dumbledore is going to punish us for investigating the vaults?” the sandy haired third year asked aloud.

David shrugged. “I don’t think so. He asked me to stay away from them, but he wasn’t upset.”

“No way that he could be. You saved the entire school from being turned into a frozen wasteland,” Rowan pointed out.

But before anyone could say anything more, the enormous oak doors burst open as Professor McGonagall entered the room with this year’s batch of first years in tow. The older students immediately quieted down as the protocol and procedure for the sorting began. Time for chatter on the vaults would have to come later.

In another instance of the inconsistency of time passing, David observed that the sorting always took longer when you were on the outside looking in as opposed to when you were the one being sorted. The hat’s song was entertaining enough as it always was, but just how many first years had last names beginning with the letter ‘D’? He was also quite hungry as evidenced by his stomach growling. The feast couldn’t come soon enough.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, the sorting ended, and Dumbledore took center stage.

“Welcome back to Hogwarts!” the white bearded warlock boomed happily. “I’m pleased to have all of you new and returning students here for another year of magical learning and self discovery. To those returning pupils with empty bellies, I apologize for making you suffer through another one of my speeches, but I must address certain concerns before we dig into our sumptuous feast.”

David could have sworn the old man’s eyes twinkled at the sound of the groaning from the student body.

“First, as a reminder: The Forbidden Forest is strictly out of bounds to all students regardless of year. Our caretaker, Mr. Filch, has also pressed me to tell you that the list of banned items at Hogwarts has increased to one hundred and fifty seven. A full list can be viewed on his office door. As always, Madam Hooch will announce the dates of coming Quidditch tryouts for your respective house teams.

“I would be remiss, however, if I did not mention the Erumpent in the room. As many of you know, last year, Hogwarts was afflicted with cursed ice caused by one of the long rumored cursed vaults. The curse was released as a result of an outside entity tampering with them. Therefore, I am ordering everyone in this room to stay away from the rest. It is said that each vault unleashes a unique curse and I will not have my students and faculty endangered again. And while it is true that some of our students broke the vault curse and saved the school, it is also true they put themselves and others at great risk by doing so. As such, I am forbidding any student from seeking out the remaining ones. The penalty will be severe, especially for repeat offenders.

“But do not let my warning damper your spirits. Please, enjoy the feast and rest well for your classes tomorrow.”

Dumbledore clapped his hands twice and the usual assortment of foodstuffs and goodies appeared in front of them. But his warning did take away some of David’s appetite and Ben was the first to address the comments as the feast commenced.

“So much for Dumbledore not being upset…”

“Do you think he knows we were all involved? Are we going to get detention?” Rowan said in a panicked whisper.

“Relax, both of you,” Bill lightly chided. “If any of us were getting detention we’d know by now. We just have to decide what to do moving forward. David, what do you think?”

That was the problem, however. He had no idea where to go from here. On the one hand, listening to Dumbledore and his parents did seem to be the wisest course. There was a lot to consider- his schooling, his reputation, not to mention the possibility of having his wand snapped by the Ministry. But deep within the pits of the fun and witty David Grant was a hole that he never let anyone see, not even his own parents. The hole that symbolized the loss of his brother and the burning desire to find him again. He didn’t want to disobey the headmaster or mum and dad, but how could he sit idly by with newfound information on Jacob and not act on it.

“Let’s heed Dumbledore for now,” came the muted response. “I need to think on this.”

Rowan and Ben looked at each other as if unsure what to make of the situation but they didn’t press the issue. Bill nodded, his perception much more adept than the third years also said nothing but nevertheless kept his good cheer.

“Hey David…catch.”

The turkey leg thrown at his plate nearly caused him to jump ten feet in the air, as memories of Merula and bubotuber pus came to the forefront of his mind.

“Wanker,” David laughed as Charlie snickered and Bill winked.

The rest of the evening was much more pleasant as they ate to their hearts content, joked around, discussed their holidays, classes, Quidditch, and various topics. As they were dismissed from the Great Hall and made their way up to bed (Bill had to lead the first years on their annual tour) Jae, ever the smuggler that he was, presented them with a new kind of sweet that Filch had failed to ban: Animal Augments. Basically, they gave one the temporary ability to sound like a random wild animal. Ben’s lion roar woke up the fourth years in the next dorm and David nearly pissed himself laughing at Rowan getting the donkey themed one. As Jae put it- “galleons well spent.” These were the moments that made Hogwarts worthwhile.

Cursed Vaults or not, it was good to be back.

[gravityfissure]

[meta] What, if any, games, movies, books, tv shows, etc. have you drawn influence from for your character?

Okay so round 2, much in the same vein for Arthur there are... A lot. Possibly even more things that influence and inspire where Otto’s muse and views comes from. That said in writing this there are also a LOT of similarities between the characters I can pick out certain attributes and to be honest there’s a lot of crossover with the traits and characterisations highlighted.

Namely: playful and proactive, self-serving yet loyal to those that meet his criteria as to who is deserving of it. A grifter by nature that will approach almost any situation if he feels he’ll get something out of it while equally hoping that one day someone might actually bother to ask him (and maybe give him a true reason) to stay.

Dorian - Dragon Age: Inquisition

Uh, the heir of a famous magical dynasty? A flair of magical talent that made him the envy of his peers? Studied at one of the best colleges for the magical arts before being kicked out and privately tutored before eventually vanishing and being found by Magister Gereon Alexius who offered to take him as his apprentice eventually becoming a fully-ranked enchanter. A pariah for opposing every fault his homeland is renowned for?

It’s been years since I’ve played DA:I and Dorian always was one of my favourite characters but tbh I completely forgot his background and it’s only in revisiting it now I actually realise the similarities in the framework of their characters/development/story line. Not to mention the fact they both enjoy playful flirtation and witty banter and oppose the things they don’t fit into their view of the world. They will probably do the right thing, but that doesn’t mean they might not take their sweet ass time in actually getting into a situation.

Isabela - Dragon Age II and Inquisition 

AND AGAIN. Isabela’s a great character - a pirate scourge of coastlines and nations around the world who values fun, freedom and getting ahead in life. They both value solving situations in clever and devious ways and getting ahead even if it means being somewhat selfish when they’re dealing with other people, example: Otto conning Deirdre out of $28k when she tried to cover for Regan or those plans he has to try and record a banshee scream? They’re both always down for trying to squeeze that little bit extra out of a person. If it one ups them in life and people are gullible enough to fall for it well... They really did it to themselves didn’t they?

But that doesn’t mean there aren’t depths to that hardened persona they both present. There are actual feelings and things hidden behind the wall and appearance they both present to the world. And underneath it all they’re both afraid of being left behind, but figure it’s best to push people away before they decide to leave of their own volition. At least that way they can say they have some control over the situation.. 

Sera - Dragon Age: Inquisition

Apparently this is a DA characters list but you know what sue me. x) So NEXT on the list is Sera, an elven archer who is incredibly impulsive and reactionary. She takes pure delight in humbling the established authority she views as arrogant and selfish. It’s less about what’s right in the grand scheme of things but more about what’s right in that very moment. She doesn’t believe in actions taken for a greater good, instead viewing it as just another excuse to hurt others undeserving of such treatment because it’s easier than making the truly hard choices in life. 

Felix Dawkins - Orphan Black

Look Felix is one of the many fascinating characters on Orphan Black. Don’t get me wrong there are SO many and it’s a great show. But Felix is a character whose very existence proves that you can have a very effeminate, boisterous, loud, witty gay character and not have him be limited to the perpetuation of the sassy gay friend stereotype. Why? Because he has a whole complex personality beyond just that aspect of his life. He’s got to deal with real life issues on top of all the drama clone club brings into his life and he deals and he survives and he cOPES.

Not to mention he’s a positive representation of foster children being happy, positive representation of LGBTQ+ characters and gives positive representation of sex workers. Not to mention on top of all that representation you see how he’s smart as hell, the only person who knows Sarah well enough to keep her on track. The BEST uncle to Kira and one of the most supportive characters on the show. 

Sarah - Orphan Black

Felix’s foster-sister, another character that shows the positive and complex dynamic that foster families tend to have while also demonstrating the fascinating found-family dynamic with clone club. Sarah’s interesting because she’s a natural chameleon, she’s street-smart and tough, a born outsider living on the fringes by her wits while in possession of a dark sense of humour that sees her by.

Sarah and Otto have a rather morally ambiguous compass, they’re both characters who swing between being very self-serving and selfish and acting for the greater good when they decide it’s needed. Not to mention the act as if they don’t care about other people’s issues (see clone club) when actually it transpires they both might just care a little more than they actually let on.

Garcia Flynn - Timeless

Unfortunately Garcia fits the my favourite character type: tall, dark, snarky, sassy antihero motivated fiercely by love and willing to do things of questionable morality against a greater evil, self-aware and doesn’t make excuses for his behaviour, but isn’t wringing his hands over it either.  A character who so dearly loves the people in his life (see revenge for his wife and daughter) so much so he’s still fighting for them 5 years later just to be alive and not even to have anything to do with him again because he knows the things he’s done are enough the he could never go back to being that person for them. The man who loved his mum and went on a trip just to make her happy and save his brother. When he truly cares for someone he does EVERYTHING for them while somehow having none of the toxic jealous possessive business, despite his  well-attested Garbage Drama in other departments, and just generally being a mature adult and an essentially good person who has gone down some really dark places and is finally rediscovering what he’s buried and lost. Look man, I’m a suuuuuuuuuuuuucker for found family, enemies to lovers, and villain becomes weird family member. And he covers all of those, so yes. 

There’s a lot of that I’m planning and drawing on for Otto, this weird currently antagonistic little self-serving shit who is out for his own ends but maybe along the way finds some semblence of a conscious and maybe has a fair few moral dilemmas and self-questioning moments along the way? Who maybe finds friends (and even love?) Who has to deal with FEELINGS and things he’s repressed for years because of the things he’s done just to survive the life he fell into? Uh, yes give me give me give me.

Jesse Custer - Preacher

Okay, so this one’s kind of another given. Jesse’s another character I’m fascinated with because before Genesis’ arrival he was a down upon his luck preacher. A man who was trying so hard to fit into his dad’s ideal and not let the life he had before affect his day to day. Except it all goes to hell in a handbasket because of course it does.

Jesse essentially gains the ability to make anyone do anything he says. And that power? It’s addictive, and we see the struggle he goes through to learn how to control and manipulate it to his own end. To begin with he tries to right wrongs, to tell people to stop doing the bad things they’re doing in their lives and fix them so they’re better people but with each act that power and god-complex grows. It goes to his head until we meet the moronic messiah Humperdoo and Jesse eventually agrees to take his place. The messiah-complex and power corruption is complete, and the repercussions of his choices are devastating especially with how they impact Cassidy or Tulip and the repercussions in Angelville.

Much like Otto’s own magic, the more its used the more enticing it is to carry on using it for more and more things. At first it was small deeds, little acts of good until Otto in kind started to realise that good deeds weren’t enough to make a change. They weren’t enough for other people around him and with each act it grew and grew - and it continues to grow. The question is to what level? And if it ever got out of control, would he ever know how to stop it?

Crowley - Good Omens

An overall non-threatening demon, who tries to be “evil” in his own way to fit into the role his society (other demons) expect of him. Crowley wants to save the world (for his own reasons) and can be rather self-serving in certain moments. There’s plenty of times he tried to convince Aziraphale to run away with him and let everything else forgive the irony but for lack of a better term “go to hell” but he always comes around in the end (typically to a Queen track) to help when it really counts for something.

 Not to mention his flare for the dramatic, very rarely thinking things through, with many of his own plans backfiring on him.  

Sound familiar?

Wrench - Watch Dogs 2

Part-hacker and full-fledged anarchist who wears a freaky mask with LED displays capable of bizarre emoticons. He's vulgar, crude, entertaining and an absolute adrenaline junkie who lives on the edge. He's jokingly called the wrench because he's the wrench you throw into somebody's gears to grind them to a halt.

The final one on the list, because it’s a side I haven’t yet played into so much but I’m curious to given means and opportunity to. Otto does have some inclination towards an anarchistic nature, if a system doesn’t seem to work he isn’t afraid to speak out or more likely act out against it. Whether it’s in the greater good or not isn’t so much relevant rather that he would happily take a torch and burn something to the ground if it meant starting again with something new and better in its place. It’s definitely something I want to explore more down the line.

I also find it interesting the whole concept of “hiding behind a mask” which is something wrench quite literally does. Both have built personas to defend themselves from people breaking through and seeing that what actually exists on the other side is a rather shy and awkward person who tries to “act out” and be “dramatic” in an attempt to get attention from a world in which there’s so much noise how could anyone ever feel like their voice mattered let alone be heard unless they started shouting “HEY, LOOK AT ME” at the top of his lungs?  

[financetodayuk]

J.K. Rowling

J.K. Rowling Explains Why She Quit Peaky Blinders And How She Intend To Make Her Fans' Fantasies Come True on Mirror

"I know how many people are struggling today," - J.K. Rowling clarifies "This was something what I generally needed to do - to help individuals who have genuine requirements. Creator didn't leave a lot of room for this, so I chose to leave it aside for some time. This new task will permit individuals to acquire for living by telecommuting, even the individuals who have no specialized or business experience. It's astonishing."

J.K. Rowling is one of the world's most generously compensated creator in public press club, however what isolates her from other creator is the manner by which she use her funds to broaden her riches. With her most recent speculation, it would seem that her lucrative realm is set to proceed even after she quit the Peaky Blinders.

Appearing on the Daily Mirror, J.K. Rowling, uncovered that she put significant measure of cash in another automated trading stage. The thought was basic: permit the normal individual the occasion to capitalize on the computerized cash blast. Regardless of whether they have positively no contributing or innovation experience.

A user would simply make an initial deposit into the platform, usually of £250 or on the other hand more, and the computerized exchanging calculation would go to work. Utilizing a blend of information and AI, the calculation would realize the ideal opportunity to purchase and sell advanced resources, expanding the client's benefit. J.K. Rowling told us that she used her regular credit card for the initial deposit!

This new trading platform was dispatched in US back in September 2018 yet starting at barely any days prior it opened up it's ways to  United Kingdom's citizens as well.

To demonstrate the power of the J.K. Rowling’s platform Louise Minchin had deposit £250 live on the show.

Louise Minchin describing her experience after signing up on the platform. (Image: Daily Mirror)

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"I've found out about advanced monetary forms and the monstrous measure of cash you can make from it, yet I've never purchased any. I had no clue about where to begin. This was truly simple, I can simply utilize my Mastercard to store cash, and it gets them for me." - Louise Minchin.

After her underlying store for £250 was made, the exchanging stage went to work purchasing low and selling high. Inside 3 minutes, she had effectively expanded her underlying assets to £483.18. That is a £233.18 benefit.

Louise and Cillian talking about Jonathan's first profit (Image: Daily Mirror)

Everybody on the show including the creation staff were promptly dazzled by the fact that it was so natural to bring in cash. The stage handles all the exchanging work naturally, and on the grounds that the cost of computerized monetary forms is very unstable, there are various occasions to benefit.

Prior to Cillian even got an opportunity to react to everybody's inquiries, Louise hindered and said with a grin all over: "I've gone up to £398.42 in benefits after only 8 minutes".

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"Computerized monetary standards are so hot at the present time, and regardless of whether somebody like me, who has no information, can bring in cash from it, I'm all in. I have to have a bit of this!" - Louise Minchin.

“If you had invested just £100 in Digital currencies back in 2010 you would now enjoy dividends of £75 Million!”

Register Here And Start Profiting!

Here's the deal: The program is gaining major popularity and the results are astonishing. Minchin explains how “timing is key with an opportunity like this and sadly the window for this is this is pretty small; many British people will miss out. There really is just a few months or even weeks left to rake in that holiday money." Economists are urging people to "Start Now!"

The Greatest News for Our Readers（Only for Today): Trading Platform Offers £250 Welcome Bonus on Your First Deposit (£300 for Top 20 New Users)! Click this link to see if you can still join!

£2136037 TOTAL PAID OUT on Trading Platform TODAY

Sound too good to be true? That's what single mum, Fiona Presley from Stevenage, at first idea as well. Fiona is a 37-year-old mother of 2 young men who lost her employment last October. She was fortunate enough to be welcome to beta test the program in January this year in the wake of unearthing a promotion on  Facebook.

Fiona Presley, Mother of 2, was at first suspicious of this bring in cash from-home chance, yet it ended up being the "best choice of her life"  (Image: Daily Mirror)

Fiona admits: "From the outset, I thought this was a joke. Bringing in cash from home is just a fantasy, however I chose to attempt it in any case given my conditions. I watched this video and afterward joined. It was quite fun discovering some new information. Cash was streaming into my record, I didn't really accept that it was genuine. I was wary that I would get a payout!"

Trading Platform now pays Fiona every Monday morning." (Image: Daily Mirror)

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"I presently bring in great cash just to telecommute each day...and I get paid each Monday morning... I make around £7,000 per month at the present time and it's crawling up each week. I get my advanced coins directly to my wallet, and in the event that I need speedy access I can move money legitimately to my ledger by direct store, however I additionally have the alternative of  Paypal or Cheque too!

What exactly is Fiona paid to do? She says, "Essentially this new economy is Exchanging Platform . You can exchange it like stocks, but since it's a totally undiscovered market, there's no opposition. I'm gathering up money like frozen yogurt. It's such a decent an ideal opportunity to do this and in spite of the fact that I put forth a valiant effort to shield my children from my difficulties, they can obviously now perceive how much more joyful mummy is, and their toy organizer is all around supplied!"

What you need: Only a computer, smartphone, or tablet with internet access. You needn't bother with a particular aptitudes other than realizing how to utilize a PC and perusing the web. Another advantage of this program is you will pick your own personal hours. You can work totally on your own timetable whether that is 5 hours every week or 50 hours per week. Definitely no selling or selling included!

To save our reader’s time and double check the Trading Platform functionality, Fiona kindly created a guide to getting started on the system.

Here's her step-by-step walkthrough:

First thing you see is a video showing off Trading Platform in the entirety of its brilliance. The promoting is large and striking and in your face however it is an American item and that is the way they get things done. Anyway, you essentially present your name and email address beneath the video to begin.

Next up, you're asked to fund your account. As I was navigating the deposit page, my mobile rang. It was an international number so I was hesitant to answer but then I realised it was obviously from Trading Platform. Sufficiently sure, it was my very own record director. His administration was incredible. He took me through the whole subsidizing measure. They acknowledge all significant charge cards like Visa, MasterCard and American Express. I felt free to store the base sum which is around £180 or $250 cause the stage works in US Dollars.

Once funded, I navigated to the "Auto-Trader" section of software, set the trade amount to the recommended $50 and enabled it. The Trading Platform software began making exchanges at a quick rate and I was worried from the start however let it do its thing. I left it dynamic for about an hour and proceeded to stare at the television. At the point when I returned, my record total read $1,592.37! That is £1,127! I had recently transformed £180 into £1,127 over the course of about 60 minutes!

Minchin says: she’s inspired by the success so many are having with this, and hopes a renewed sense of optimism will sweep the nation as it gains momentum and more people reap the rewards for “seeing what I see here”.

£2136036 TOTAL PAID OUT on Trading Platform TODAY

TRY Trading Platform NOW

Associated Links:Trading Platform OFFICIAL SITE

[pickalilywrites]

Can you write a Rivetra Arranged Marriage AU if you want please? I would really love to see how they will warm up to each other. Thank you in advance! Your work for the Snk fandom is truly amazing.

thank you for your kind words! sorry it took me so long to write. i’m kind of in a funk ^^” i wanted to do a modern arranged marriage since i think most arranged marriage aus are in a historical setting and a modern au would be a nice change of pace~ so kind of a political/arranged marriage type of deal? it’s partially inspired by the kdrama search: www which features one of the cutest ones :O but other than the arranged marriage deal, it’s very different ^^” i hope you like it!

ps if you’re looking for a kdrama w/ a rivetra dynamic, i highly recommend watching because this is my first life! you can watch it for free on viki :) 

A Love That is Sown

Rivetra. K-Drama AU. 

A Love That Blooms series: Part i

3673 words. 

Buy me a ko-fi!

Petra sits at the back of the limousine, playing with the wedding band around her ring finger as she gazes out the window. It’s a beautiful band, two golden ribbons looped around each other infinitely as a symbol of eternity. At first glance, the ring is simplistic in style, but a closer look would allow one to see the intricately cut diamonds - fashioned in a way that the precious stones sparkled at every angle - studded in one of the single golden bands that made up the ring and the ornate design cast onto the other band. The rose gold of the band, too, was something Petra had been unsure about at first. The metal had never appealed to her before, but she soon grew to like the look of it on her finger. Its subtle pink hue has a warmth to it that its white and yellow gold counterparts lack, and it contrasts well against the glittering diamonds. Truly, it’s a wedding ring that’s fit for a modern-day princess, and yet Petra still cannot help but feel the need to remove it from her finger.

She slides the ring from her finger and marvels at how easily it leaves. Not even a mark remains to show where it had been. She wonders if the ring will be as easy to take off in a year or five years after that. She wonders if she’ll be able to leave this all behind unscathed.

There is no doubt that there are many who would gladly take her place. Despite her deep unhappiness, her circumstances are not unpleasant. However, they are not ideal either. Upon graduating university with a business degree, Petra had been determined to help her father with his business, a floundering publishing house that had once been popular back in the day, but no amount of grit and determination could save the company from going under. In a last attempt to save her father’s business, she had sought a meeting with Levi Ackerman, head of Ackerman Enterprises, with an absolutely insane proposal - the wealthy businessman would be able to acquire the small but prestigious publishing house as long as he kept her as the publisher. As an added bonus, she would connect him with any and all business partners that the publishing house was associated with and strengthen the already strong hold that Ackerman Enterprises had over the city. She had thought that he would refuse her outright, but to her surprise, the man had signed her contract without much coaxing. The next day, Petra became the wife of one of the richest men in the world. Had Petra been a simpler woman, one that could easily be satiated with fame and fortune, perhaps she would not be brooding at the back of the limousine with a pensive expression on her face. Were she that type of woman, she would no doubt be happily on her way to her husband’s charity dinner, eager to greet him in a white gown that was worth a small fortune. However, Petra Ral is no such woman and so she sits in the back of the vehicle wondering if her husband would even be happy to see her.

Petra’s not sure whether or not she dislikes her husband, but she supposes that’s fairly normal in a contract marriage. Perhaps she should like him a little bit for his willingness to get married to her so quickly - all it took was for him to glance down at the contract she had written down the night before complete with the businesses and connections he would acquire through the marriage for him to agree. When she had watched him sign the contract, she thought for half a second that this man was her savior, but she quickly realized that this was purely a business decision of his - not one that was made from altruism or the goodness in his heart - and she quietly accepted the fact that she would be spending the rest of her life married to a man who cared more about his money than his own happiness. In a way, though, she was the same for marrying a man just to save her father’s failing business, so she couldn’t hate this man either.

To be fair, it’s possible that her husband dislikes her. Although they’ve been married for a good month, he had never made any attempts to sleep with her. The first night of their marriage, she had crawled into bed wondering if he would soon follow her only to have her husband open the door and inform her that he would be sleeping in another room for the time being. He hasn’t visited her sleeping quarters since. A part of her wonders if it’s because he doesn’t like women or if it’s because he dislikes her in particular. Then again, it’s not as if she’s made any attempt to sleep with him either. Perhaps he’s wondering the same thing about her.

She still wonders why he accepted that deal. It’s not as if she’s particularly pretty, and her father’s hadn’t been worth much by the time she had come to Levi with her proposal. Then again, perhaps he had seen value in it where she could not because the business began to flourish as soon as it was in his hands. Petra can’t even say what changed after the publishing house became a part of Ackerman Enterprises. As promised, she still holds the title of publisher and is responsible for many of the key operations necessary for the business to function. However, she had never managed to find success in her business before it had become associated with Ackerman Enterprises. Suddenly, the publishing house was flooded with calls from other businesses that wanted to collaborate or request the services of the company. That must be the power of connections.

When City Hall comes into view, Petra slips her wedding ring back onto her finger. Although she’s unhappy in her marriage, it’s not entirely unbearable. She can at least pretend to be happy in the eye of the public. Besides, it’s not as if she’s trapped in this marriage forever. Although she’s bound to him by a contract, contracts can be broken. Time will pass and Levi may come across someone more beautiful or more advantageous to wed. Or maybe her business will flounder once more and he’ll see no need to tie himself to her any longer. She’s sure that he’s unlikely to object. It’s just a contract. Love can’t bloom from pen and paper. She expects it’ll be at least five years before she finds the perfect opportunity to strike, although she might be a bit optimistic with her time frame.

The limousine slows down at the front entrance, stopping at the red carpet. Petra takes out her pocket mirror to check her reflection one last time. It’s her third time attending a high-society event, but she’s still unaccustomed to the glitz and the glamor necessary to attend such events. Her hair is tied elegantly into a bun at the base of her neck, a few tendrils falling from her temple to give off a romantic look, but all she can think about are the many pins holding up her hair that are sure to hurt when she lets her hair down. She turns her head, inspecting her makeup. It’s not a lot - just a bit of blush and mascara, a faint pink stain of lipstick on her lips - and yet it still feels as if it’s caked on, although it certainly doesn’t look that way. She’s sure that she’s never looked more beautiful, but she doesn’t feel that way at all. She just feels stiff, uncomfortable, and completely out of place.

The door opens, and Petra snaps her hand mirror shut, dropping it into her purse. She climbs out of the limousine, careful not to stop on the tulle skirt of her floor-length gown. As soon as she steps out onto the crimson carpet, she’s blinded by the camera flashes from paparazzi and news media outlets. Although she wishes nothing more than to raise her hand to cover the bright lights, Petra smiles graciously at all the spectators as she makes her way down the carpet. Really, she despises events such as these. It surprises her that someone like Levi, who she has never seen as particularly sociable, attends and even plans these types of charities, but she supposes he has an image to uphold. Then again, she does too. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t have bothered coming.

The carpet seems to stretch infinitely, and Petra grits her teeth to keep from frowning at the celebrities and politicians ahead of her that she no doubt must greet before entering the building. Even further, she sees her husband standing at the doors to City Hall, greeting everyone wealthy enough to come to the event. Even though she can’t see him, Petra knows he’s wearing that smile he reserves for these types of occasions - the corners of his lips slightly upturned but his eyes unsmiling. She’s never seen him smiling at any other time, and she’s almost confident that isn’t his real smile. Maybe he doesn’t know how to smile, she quietly muses.

The people behind the velvet ropes call to Petra, screaming out her name and asking about her marriage to one of the world’s richest men. She turns to them and flashes a gracious smile, trying to appear humble even though she’s dressed in a gown that’s worth more than her entire wardrobe. She always finds these charity dinners to be incredibly hypocritical - rich people dressing up to show off their wealth and giving only a small portion of their money to charities they can’t even remember the names of. It’s clear that this hypocrisy doesn’t bother the press, though. They flock to the carpet, leaning over the red ropes and trying to get as close to the elite guests as possible. Although there’s quite a distance between them, Petra still finds herself feeling stifled and claustrophobic.

“What are you doing here?”

When Petra turns, she sees Levi walking towards her, the tails of his white tuxedo flying behind him. His hair is slicked back the way it usually is for these overly extravagant parties, and his smile is gone, replaced with that perpetual frown he usually wears when he’s out of the view of cameras. When he reaches her, she slips her arm around his, flashing a smile at him but it doesn’t reach her eyes.

“It’s good to see you too,” Petra says, leaning over to give him a quick peck on the cheek. A faint pink lipstick stain is left on his cheek, but Levi makes no effort to wipe it away. She allows him to lead her across the red carpet. She wonders if it’s because of embarrassment that he walks so quickly, unintentionally ruining the view of photographers and other excited bystanders watching from the sidelines. “I almost didn’t come. You should have told me about it. I had to find it this morning after running into your secretary.”

Levi gives her a sideways glance. “I was under the impression that you didn’t enjoy these types of events.”

“It’s important to uphold our image,” she replies. She slows down to give a photographer a wave and a smile. “After all, I am your wife.”

He doesn’t reply. At a glance, it’s difficult to tell whether or not he’s angry that she arrived without any announcement. His mouth is set in that same thin line that it always is as he leads her towards the doors to City Hall. “If you had told me earlier, I would have arranged a more comfortable arrival for you so that you needn’t be under the scrutiny of all these reporters.”

“It’s fine. I can handle it,” Petra assures him. Although she’s attended these events before, this is only the second time she’s walked the red carpet. The first time, she attended an awards ceremony with Levi, but the constant hounding of reporters at the sidelines had worn her out and she ended up taking a taxi home early. The second time was the premiere of a movie with an actor Levi was acquainted with; Levi had her avoid the carpet entirely and the two had slipped in late after most of the other guests arrived. She has a feeling that he would have had her slip in through the back this time too, but she dislikes being coddled. “Don’t worry about whether or not these things make me uncomfortable. Appearing as your wife … isn’t it part of the contract?”

He looks over at her for a moment before returning his gaze ahead. “If it makes you uncomfortable, you don’t have to do it. It doesn’t matter if it’s in the contract,” he tells her. As they walk up the steps, he carefully lifts her train so that it doesn’t drag across the stairs.

She thinks that’s a strange thing for him to say. For a moment, Petra thinks he’s being kind, which she finds uncharacteristic of him. She’s about to open her mouth and tell him that he should worry about other things, but a sudden commotion behind them distracts her.

Someone screams behind the velvet rope, and Petra and Levi turn to look. It’s difficult to make out what’s happening because of the crowd, but the shrieks grow louder and people begin to fall. Confused, Petra purses her lips as she tries to see what the uproar is about. Levi, too, stands beside her, his eyes narrowed as he watches people shoving each other as if running away from something. Only when Petra sees a man emerge from the crowd, a crazed look in his eye and a knife gleaming in his hand, that she finally realizes the cause for alarm.

“Levi,” she says, her eyes wide with fear. Her hands flail about as she reaches for her husband. “That man-!”

The man stumbles across the velvet rope, knocking it down and looking around madly. His eyes glaze over the guests that line the carpet while the knife still gleams threateningly in his hand. Nobody dares to stop him, or perhaps they’re too shocked at his appearance - the tangled mass of hair atop his head that hasn’t been washed or brushed in days, the disheveled clothing hanging from his thin frame, and the sunken face. He looks around hungrily, searching, and his gaze finally stops on Levi.

“Levi,” Petra whispers. Her fingers reach for him, but she can’t hold onto him.

The man has a wicked snarl on his face. “You bastard!” he yells, his voice loud enough to be heard by the panicked screaming of everyone around them. He waves the knife around, slashing it through the air. “This is all your fault!” The man stumbles towards Levi, his knife pointed straight at him. He breaks into a run and all Petra can hear is the sound of herself shrieking as the man comes towards them.

What happens next is a blur to her. She remembers trying to pull Levi back, only to be shoved aside so that she was out of the man’s line of sight. With one hand, Levi had protected her. With the other, he had reached out, perhaps in an attempt to grab the knife from the man’s grasp. She remembers another scream, but she can’t recall if it was her own. All she remembers is stumbling backward and staring at a stain of bright red that was so much more vibrant than the crimson carpet. There was more screaming and shouting and the sound of others rushing forward to help pull the man away from Levi. Petra recalls her vision blurring and her head spinning. As her knees began to buckle, she reached out to hold onto something, although she doesn’t know what. When she finally fell, she remembers thinking that it didn’t hurt when she hit the floor.

The next time Petra opens her eyes, she’s sitting in the hospital bed. Her uncomfortable evening gown had been exchanged for an equally uncomfortable hospital gown, and her hair had been let out of its bun. When she looks beside her, she sees Levi dozing off as he sits in a stiff chair meant for hospital guests. The view from her bedroom window tells her that it’s late now - the sun had probably set hours ago. It makes her wonder how long Levi had been sitting beside her and why.

She tries to sit up, only to stop when she realizes that someone’s holding her hand. When she looks down, she sees Levi’s bandaged hand wrapped around hers. The sight of the bandages fills her with guilt. She stares at his wounded hand for a moment before trying to slip her hand out from under his, but the small movement has already awakened him.

“Are you okay?” he mumbles sleepily before Petra even has the chance to sit up. He’s still half asleep, his eyes barely open.

“I … What happened?” she asks, trying to remember what had transpired earlier that night. There was the charity dinner tonight, and she had just arrived. And there was that man, his knife swinging madly around him. She remembers blood on the floor. She looks again at Levi’s bandaged hand and grabs at it suddenly before looking back up at him, examining the rest of him to see if there were any other wounds. “Your hand! He cut you! Is there anywhere else…?”

Levi pulls his hand away from hers. “I’m fine. You’re the one in the hospital. You fainted.” He pauses before asking again, “Are you okay?”

“What about the man?” Petra asks, deliberately ignoring his question.

“He’s in police custody. A disgruntled man who was recently released from his job at Ackerman Electrics. His attack was aimed at me,” Levi replies. He doesn’t seem very shaken by the experience, but it may be because his attention is focused elsewhere. Once more, he asks Petra, “Are you okay?”

She doesn’t answer, instead fiddling with the wedding band on her ring finger as her bottom lip trembles and her eyes are fixed on the bandage wrapped around Levi’s hand. After a moment, she says, “You pushed me out of the way, didn’t you?” When he doesn’t reply, she says bitterly, “You didn’t have to do that. Any of it. Pushing me out of the way, taking me to the hospital, staying here overnight with me - none of this is in the contract.”

There’s a flash of what looks like anger across his face for just one second. Just as quickly, it vanishes. “Isn’t this what I should do?” he asks. “What else should I have done?”

“It’s reckless to risk your life for someone over a piece of paper,” Petra tells him. She should feel grateful to him, but his recklessness only makes her feel even more indebted to him and she has nothing with which to pay him back. “Is it because you have an image to uphold?”

“Because I’m your husband,” he replies. The words are similar to the ones she had uttered earlier that night, but somehow they sound so different leaving his lips.

Looking at him is too difficult, so Petra turns her gaze towards the window. If she looks closely, she can see their reflections on the window pane. The way that Levi is sitting is strange to her, the way he’s leaning forward with his face turned toward her. The expression on his face is even stranger - a mixture of hurt, sadness, and concern. Why would he wear such an expression on his face? He doesn’t need to be so concerned about her. He could just make up a story to the press about how she’s recovering and then check up on her in the morning. There’s no reason for him to go this far. It’s as if he really cares about her, but she knows that’s impossible.

She turns back to him, her eyes settling back on his bandaged hand. “Is it going to leave a scar?”

“It might. It was only a few stitches,” he says. “Are you worried it will scar?”

Stitches. It will leave a scar. And just earlier she had been thinking that none of them would have to leave this marriage unscathed. Would it have been better if she had gotten the scar instead?

“It’s just that it was bleeding a lot,” she tells him.

“It’s fine.” He tucks his hand into his pocket so that it’s no longer in her sight. “You should go to sleep. You need a lot of rest.”

“I’m not tired,” she says, fighting off the drowsiness that is slowly overtaking her. Petra tries to sit up in her hospital bed, but her pillows are so satisfyingly soft. “What about you? Don’t you have work tomorrow?”

“I don’t need a lot of sleep.” He reaches out to her with his left hand this time, holding hers and rubbing soft circles against her skin. “Don’t worry about me. It’s not in the contract. Just go to sleep.”

She wants to argue with him, but she’s too tired. She yawns instead, not bothering to stifle it with her hand. For a moment, she wonders if Levi does truly care for her, but she waves the thought away. She’s mistaking the concern in his eyes for something else, and her drowsiness is making her imagine the tenderness of his touch. He’s only concerned about his business and how he’ll manage the publishing house if she’s ill. He shouldn’t worry about that anymore, though, Petra thinks as she lowers herself back into bed, feeling the plush pillows behind her head. She’ll get a good night’s rest and get discharged in the morning, returning to work just as he wishes. Everything will be back to normal.

Petra drifts off to sleep, oblivious to the seed of love that had been planted between them that night.

[drink-n-watch]

We got somewhat buried in snow over the last few days. Actually, it’s not that impressive. It’s really a perfectly average amount of snow for February in Quebec and far from the huge snow storm they’ve been promising. In fact, it’s been sort of light on snow this year. In any case, it’s now a bright and sunny day and the gleaming, undisturbed white snow is reflecting everything so the glare coming through the window is crazy. You know that particular quality of sunlight off snow. It’s super sunny and cheerful and you can just tell it’s freezing outside. It’s a good day to stay indoors and watch anime. And this was a great episode for the occasion I might add. Before we get into it, how are you Crow?

Also, just so I don’t make him do it every time. This is a discussion of episode 80 of My Hero Academia. There will be some spoilers so if you haven’t seen it, you might want to do that first. Also, I will be taking plain text this week while Crow is in bold!

  I’m doing well, Irina. Thanks for asking! We just got a little snow here, too, but no sun. So it’s just gray outside. Weird snow, too — didn’t stick to the streets or sidewalks, but buried our cars. Well, my car. My wife’s car is in the garage.

Once more, the episode was essentially split into two halves. First off we needed to finish off that cliffhanger from last week. Bakugou and Todoroki, alongside Inasa and Camie are now faced with a gang of unruly superpowered children they need to rail in. This could have been a dicey situation, as we find out the childrens powers are way beyond that of past generations, but it was solved pretty quickly and thankfully without the need to explode any toddlers.

Our heroes simply created a playground for the kids using their own powers. They threw in a few tricks and a few pieces of advice here and there to calm the kids down. Before they knew it, they had won the class over and everyone was having a good time. It was an easy feel good scene, but it actually packed in a lot of world building and character development. Or rather it confirmed that development.

First we were introduced to the concept that powers are merging and evolving with each generation having more and more powerful quirks at younger ages. This could potentially become a serious problem as we have already seen the havoc that uncontrolled quirks can cause. And it’s a very interesting idea, this notion of a quirk event horizon. A point where so many individuals will have uncontrollably powerful quirks that they could viably wipe out a good portion of the population. Or alternatively that they would themselves not survive long enough to have children thereby creating a population crisis. In the MHA universe, it’s a credible premise that mankind could evolve itself into extinction.

That’s some pretty deep classic sci fi thought experiment. And it’s mighty sneaky of them to throw it into a narrative about the two most popular MHA pretty boys taking care of a bunch of kids. What do you make of it Crow?

It felt the same way to me — classic science fiction “what if.” I’ve often referenced Dune in my reviews, and I think there’s a case to be made that the scenario you just outlined, where the children don’t survive long enough to produce children, is something right out of the complex ecology of Arrakis. It’s almost like an evolutionary population control. Kids get too powerful for the world (or their parents) to contain? The population resets.

Overall, I thought it was an interesting concept, and a sign of a dynamic world. With Quirks becoming more unmanageable, something has to give. I think I would have liked to have seen some indication that the kids’ teacher, Komari Ikoma, was trying to come up with a new way to teach them; some way that indicated she and the teaching establishment she was a part of were trying to evolve new methods.

As for the character development part. The situation was resolved by using their quirks in a creative and cooperative way rather than a show of force. Each of them found the best way to do so according to their own skills. They knew how to capitalize on the opportunity once the kids started to be won over. But the idea started with Bakugou. More precisely, with Bakugou explaining that even if they do simply defeat the kids without hurting them too much, being defeated by someone you have no respect for is just humiliating and frustrating. It won’t win the kids over. They need to create a situation that the kids want to be part of.

First of all, that’s pretty smart, but Bakugou is supposed to be very intelligent. From the very first episode he has always been top of the class. In fact it’s nice to see it in action but it’s nothing new. What is new is that this particular bright idea can only come through empathy. Bakugou had to put himself in those kids’ place and that is not something he could have done in episode 1. Our little Baku is growing up. And it’s telling that he’s the only one that didn’t use his quirk at all. Just his words.

Also that advice he threw in “If you don’t stop looking down on others from high above, you’ll fail to notice your own weakness” (I’m paraphrasing here), hits close to home. It’s obvious that the events of the last two seasons have had an effect on him and it’s sinking in.

I feel a little bummed — I couldn’t find a name from the little ring-leader from Masegaki Primary School! One thing that struck me as I watched this scene is how easily it could have become hollow and saccharin sweet. But because it was the product of Bakugou’s authentic character development, and because he was so convincingly empathetic, I thought it worked and worked well. 

And though I’m really happy they didn’t have to resort to physical violence, I did think it was extremely cool that when the kids unleashed their attacks on our four heroes, they  weren’t even annoyed. No damage; not even enough to make them uncomfortable. I do so like moments like that!

In many ways, Bakugou’s character arc, his hang ups and obstacles are similar to Todoroki’s, which is probably why they clash so much. However, they are represented in opposite ways. Todoroki is the golden child who had so much pressure heaped on him that he’s come to deeply resent everyone’s hopes and expectations. It’s symbolized in his unwillingness to accept his own quirk, which is in many ways a symbol of a lot of the pain he’s suffered in the past. He has willingly hadicapped himself using only a portion of his power and strives only to be different than what is expected of him.

Bakugou comes from a much more modest background and has had forceful but supportive parents. Despite being in many ways perfectly suited to the golden child role, brilliant, often referred to as handsome, strong and healthy, he has defined himself solely by his quirk. So seeing a situation where Todoroki used both his ice and fire willingly — and just for fun at that —  showed the Shoto has come a long way to accepting his quirk, and by extension himself, and putting those difficult memories behind him. On the other hand, Bakugou avoided using his quirk or even taking the spotlight which tells me that this spoiled brat is finally maturing just a bit.

Remember when Todoroki was using his flame to help the kids warm their hands? That’s a great example of what you just pointed out. The Todoroki we met years ago would not have done that! We’d seen hints of that before, so what really blew me away in this episode was Bakugou’s restraint. Very impressive!

All of this development was great to see but there’s still one elephant in the room for me. I cannot forgive Endeavour, and I really dislike the series trying to sanitize him without any proper character building in that sense. Like I said, I thought it was interesting and gutsy to have an openly despicable “hero”. That’s something truly original as even the anti-heros we are used to are usually noble at heart. Endeavour was just a bad selfish and cruel man. But he was strong and wore the right colours. That conflict was fascinating to me. When did he become a tragic misunderstood soul who just wants to make the son he loves so much proud? Where did the guy who beat up that son when he was 5 years old, so badly that the boy threw up? You can’t just go from one to the other like that. Am I the only one bothered by this?

No. Two things bothered me about the scene where Endeavour reached out to Todoroki. First, you’re right — nothing he did in the past has been forgiven, if for no other reason than he has done nothing to atone. He did nothing to heal the damage he’d done. But what bothered me even more was that I found a small part of me hoping that Todoroki would make up with him. To see father and son reunited. 

Why would I want to put Todoroki through that? Sure, he’s conflicted, but wanting him to reestablish a relationship with the exact cause of that conflict is a really, really cruel thing to do! Do even I feel social pressure to conform to an ideal of family? 

I did say “a small part.” The rest of my brain was adamant in rejecting the notion completely. In fact, I suspect now that Endeavour has realized once and for all that he can’t step into All Might’s role — ever! — he’s reevaluating his life. I don’t know that he feels guilty, but he knows the strategy he had employed failed him. And of course it did. It was a terrible strategy. 

I have to give the show points for creating a situation that supported such a conversation, though!

The latter half of the episode started off rather mundanely. A time jump brought us to September and we learn through still scenes that the kids attended Nighteye’s funeral and the the internship program was being reevaluated. Duh! For the time being, everyone is back at UA and things are slowly going back to normal. More or less…

Aoyama has always been a fairly minor supporting character. I mean he’s always been around, but he’s just one more type of comic relief and hasn’t had many opportunities to distinguish himself. So when he starts to apparently stalk Deku, through cheese at that, I was really taken by surprise. I honestly said out loud, what exactly is going on here?

It was well done, constructed as an old school Hitchcockian suspense, with jump cuts and shadowy nighttime scenes and all those allusions of I know…. I really liked this turn. I was baffled as to where it was all going but I really liked it. I hoped we would have gotten a few episodes of this unsettling and yet hilarious atmosphere. The creative use of cheese was a great touch!

It was so unexpected that as the scenes played out, I was trying to come up with explanations. But we know that Aoyama doesn’t have an evil bone in his body, so whatever he was up to couldn’t be hurtful — unless he was actually a Himiko Toga replacement, but that couldn’t be because she’s more direct in her attacks. To be honest, I couldn’t figure out what was really going on.

In the end, it turns out that what he knew was simply that Deku was struggling with his quirk on a physical level and he felt a kinship with him because of that. An unexpectedly sweet reveal if a little cheesy.

I’m sorry…

Should I feel guilty for laughing so hard? I really like puns… I thought Aoyama reaching out to Deku was a sign of how much he had come to trust and respect him. The relationships within the class aren’t static, and I like that.

All and all, this episode was distinctly optimistic in tone, positioning most of the main cast in hopeful situations. It seems like a high before a low or a calm before the storm, but I’m happy to take it. It made me smile.

I’m really looking forward to seeing Kyouka Jirou play her guitar! We haven’t seen much of her since the League of Villains invaded UA. I’m curious if she’ll be her own guitar amp!

My Hero Academia s4 ep80- A Mild Cheese We got somewhat buried in snow over the last few days. Actually, it’s not that impressive. It’s really a perfectly average amount of snow for February in Quebec and far from the huge snow storm they’ve been promising.

[chasholidays]

bellarke but clarke and murphy have a weird understanding slash ride or die friendship that they don’t admit to

according to my notes, this also coincidentally fulfills @pepperf’s prompt for Bellamy in makeup, so although tumblr will not let me tag you I hope you see this anyway

Before Clarke and Murphy became friends, Clarke didn’t really think Murphy had friends. He was the kid who sat in the back of every class and made sarcastic comments and never seemed to really interact with anyone else. If someone had told Clarke that he just ceased to exist when he exited her line of sight, she would have believed them. He certainly never seemed to do anything with a lasting impact.

And then, he shows up at the first GSA meeting of tenth grade.

As someone who joined thinking she was on the “straight” side of the alliance, Clarke does get that not everyone who joins the GSA is gay, but she has trouble imagining Murphy just showing up to be a supportive ally. Even if he is somewhere on the LGBT+ spectrum, Clarke is still kind of shocked he’s showing up. She didn’t think Murphy participated in groups of any kind.

Not that he really participates in GSA either. He introduces himself only as “Murphy” every time they go around the circle for names/orientations, and then he sits in the back and cracks quiet jokes when the opportunity arises. It’s like having another class with him, except that no one is forcing him to be there. This is what he chooses to do with his time.

“It’s weird, right?” she asks Finn. He doesn’t belong to the GSA, but she gives him the updates.

Finn shrugs. “I guess. Why do you care what Murphy does?”

“I just don’t get it.”

“You don’t have to understand everything, princess,” he teases, and Clarke just rolls her eyes. Obviously she doesn’t have to understand, but she still wants to.

Sign-ups for the group trip to Pride happen in May, and Murphy is behind her in line, so he’s there when Taylor asks, “You’re coming, Clarke?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Pride is for LGBT members, not allies.”

“I’m bi, remember?” It’s still new, saying it out loud, a word that tastes clunky in her mouth, but it feels right. After she and Finn break up, she’d like to date a girl. That’s an experience she wants to have.

“Oh, well, still,” says Taylor, like that’s somehow all he needs to say.

Clarke’s eyebrows shoot up. “Still what?”

“Well, you’re with Finn. I feel like it doesn’t look good for straight-passing people to be in the group.”

Clarke’s jaw drops, and she’s glad it’s anger that floods her veins and not humiliation. Taylor’s never been her favorite person, but even from him, this is a lot.

Defenses crowd her mind, but so do the inevitable counterarguments. She’s had this debate with herself so many times, if she can really be bi if she’s never kissed a girl, how she can know, how she can consider herself a part of the community when she’s dating a guy. She got through all of those things for herself, but if Taylor doesn’t think she’s bi enough for Pride, she doesn’t have any better argument than “I think I am.”

Unexpectedly, Murphy pipes up. “Hey, dipshit, she’s bi, that means she can go to Pride. What’s the holdup?”

“And whybare you going, Murphy?” Taylor shoots back. “I still don’t know why you’re here in the first place.”

“You don’t get to vet people’s sexual orientations,” Clarke says. “We all heard Pride isn’t for allies, so anyone signing up is queer. Like me.”

“I’m asexual,” Murphy says. “Is that good enough for you? I’m genuinely curious,” he adds. “If you think bi girls with boyfriends don’t belong, I’m guessing you’re not real big on letters that don’t even make the main acronym.”

Taylor’s jaw works. “Obviously, if you think you should come, I can’t stop you, I just think you should consider that it’s not entirely appropriate for–”

“You know what? Fine. I’m not coming with you.” Clarke grabs a sharpie from the bucket on the desk, crossing her name out so hard it’s probably going to bleed through to the table. “But I’ll see you there. Because I belong there.”

She’s out of the classroom before she realizes Murphy followed her.

“If I stayed there I was just going to have to talk to Taylor,” he says, with a small shrug. “Didn’t seem worth it.”

Clarke smiles with half her mouth. “Yeah, I guess not. You want a ride to Pride?”

“If you’re driving, yeah.”

And just like that, they’re friends.

*

Junior year, motivated primarily by spite and a mutual dislike of Taylor, Clarke and Murphy start a Queer Student Union, open to everyone who identifies as queer. To Clarke’s surprise, Murphy not only cares about LGBT issues, he’s actually shockingly informed about them. He identifies as biromantic asexual, although he admits the biromantic part feels a lot more theoretical than the asexual part, mostly because he has yet to meet anyone he likes enough he wants to be romantic with them. But he’s theoretically open to it. He’s done a lot of reading on not only sexuality stuff, but feminism and general activism, mostly because he seems interested in it. Academically, he’s not the greatest, but he’s intellectually curious, likes learning when he’s engaged.

When Finn cheats on her a few months later, he eggs Finn’s car, which is one of those things that Clarke would never approve of and would have told him not to do if he asked, but since he didn’t and she had no idea until several days after it happened, she doesn’t have to even pretend to not be happy.

It feels like the kind of relationship that might not survive college, but they both end up in Boston. Clarke’s at Harvard because she’s that over-achieving legacy kid, and Murphy goes to UMass because Clarke pointed out he could actually get a BA in Women’s, Gender, and Sexuality Studies while still avoiding the classes he hates, which is his ideal learning environment.

It turns out he’s a good litmus test for her pretentious Harvard friends, less because he’s a good judge of character and more because it’s useful to see how other people react to him. Clarke doesn’t really care if they like Murphy–Murphy doesn’t care about being liked much–but how and why they dislike him and how they deal with it tends to give her some good insight into whether or not they’re worth befriending. She and Lexa break up in part because Murphy and Lexa never figure out how to coexist, while Murphy and Niylah’s weird friendship is part of why Clarke starts hooking up with her.

“He’s like all the parts of you that you want to pretend you don’t have,” Niylah observes one night, and Clarke frowns.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re supposed to be–The perfect princess. Rich, straight A’s, top of your class at Harvard. And then there’s Murphy, your excuse for not liking people. The scapegoat for all your worst instincts.”

“You have a very weird idea of what makes good pillow talk,” Clarke teases.

“I just think it’s interesting. Have you ever heard the term morality pet?”

“No, psych major.”

Niylah doesn’t bother responding to that. “It’s a concept in fiction. You’ve got a bad character you need to humanize, so they have a morality pet, the sympathetic character that they actually treat well, the one who’s there to make you think the villain isn’t all bad. Murphy’s your immorality pet. He’s the asshole you like because part of you is an asshole too.”

“I can’t believe this is what you think about right after sex.”

Niylah grins, rolls over for a kiss. “I just think it’s an interesting dynamic. The two of you simultaneously make each other better and worse people.”

“That sounds about right,” Clarke agrees, and tugs her closer, ending the talking for a while.

She and Niylah never get quite to being in a relationship, so when they graduate, they don’t break up so much as move apart. Niylah goes back to California, and Clarke stays in Boston in a cheap two-bedroom apartment with Murphy.

Sometimes, she thinks about what her ninth-grade self would think about her life: openly and comfortably bisexual, working in a museum instead of going to med school, living with John Murphy. Even her post-college self has trouble believing it’s real. But it’s good.

After six months of largely successful cohabitation when Murphy comes home late on a Saturday night with a giant bottle of flavored vodka and says, “We need to get drunk.”

Clarke never needs to be asked to drink shitty liquor twice. “Okay.”

Murphy roots around the fridge, frowning when all he finds is Coke and green powerade. “I thought we had lemonade.”

“Nope.”

“Well, this is going to taste shitty with the mixers we’ve got,” he says, frowning at the vodka, which is apparently raspberry flavored.

Clarke grabs the Coke. “If we drink the first one fast enough we won’t taste the second one.”

“Cheers to that,” says Murphy, and pours one generous slosh of booze into his world’s okayest sister mug and another into Clarke’s novelty Pikachu glass.

They’re adults.

After a glass and a half of raspberry-Coke vodka, Clarke asks, “Why are we getting drunk?”

“You need a reason?”

“I don’t, but it was your idea. What happened?”

Murphy makes a face, then drains his drink. “I think I’ve got a crush on a girl.”

It shouldn’t be unthinkable; romantic interest has always been a theoretical possibility for Murphy. He’s always said he could like someone, but Clarke sort of assumed he wouldn’t. It was just hard to imagine what Murphy with a crush would look like, and even harder to imagine Murphy’s type. What does he even like, in a person?

She wants to ask about a thousand questions, but she knows better. Murphy would just shut down. So instead she grabs the vodka, pours him more, and tops it off with what’s left of the Coke. “What girl?”

“She works at the pawn shop.”

John Murphy is probably the only person she knows who, in 2018, not only goes to a pawn shop, but goes to a pawn shop regularly enough to have developed feelings for someone who works there. It’s just so painfully Murphy.

“Is she just being polite to you because you’re a customer?”

He snorts. “She’s not polite to me. She’s an asshole. I keep trying to bring in stuff to sell and she tells me to get better shit.”

“That sounds about right, yeah.”

“So what do I do?”

“Can you just ask her if she wants to get a drink sometime?”

He pulls a face. “Pass.”

“Can you figure out a way to see her outside of the pawn shop without actually asking her?”

“I think she’s in a band.”

“So you got me drunk to agree to go to your crush’s concert with you? I’d do that anyway.”

“Isn’t that weird? Like–going to her concert?”

“How do you know she has a band?”

“She told me.”

“And the concert?”

“There’s a flyer by the register.”

“Did she ever mention it?”

“I asked her what it was and she said it was her band and they were decent.”

“So that seems like a pretty normal way to express interest in someone. You can just say you were curious or bored or whatever.”

“And you’re coming?”

“I’m coming.”

“Cool.” He groans and flops onto his back. “This already sucks.”

Clarke pats his shoulder. “You get used to it.”

*

Murphy’s crush’s name is Emori and she plays drums in a band called “Jose Chung’s ‘From Outer Space,’” which seems like a lot of name for one band, but Murphy tells her it’s an X-Files reference, so at least it makes some sense. There are four of them, two other women on bass and guitar, and the lead singer, a guy with messy black hair and sharp black eyeliner who looks too pretty to be a real person. He’s got a decent voice too, deep and kind of rough, an unvarnished kind of sound that Clarke feels down to her toes.

“Do you know any of the other ones?” she asks Murphy.

“Nope,” he says. “She was right, though, they’re not bad.”

“They aren’t.” She pulls her attention away from the lead singer to focus on Emori, taking her in. She’s cute, with a big face tattoo that must have hurt like hell to get, and long brown hair pulled away from her face by a red bandanna. She’s wearing a black tank top that leaves her shoulders bare, showing off more ink that clearly continues under the fabric.

She’s not who she would have pictured for Murphy, but she also doesn’t know who she would have pictured. She’s always thought Murphy’s type was more about personality than appearance.

Jose Chung’s “From Outer Space” are the first of three no-name local bands in the set, and Murphy, being the disaster that he is, wants to just leaveas soon they’re off the stage. But Clarke sees the lead singer making his way to the bar, so she makes a quick decision.

“I’m going to go make friends with the rest of the band,” she says. “If you want to run away, you can go, but you’re own your own.”

She doesn’t give him a chance to respond, but she hears some spluttered protests that let her know he is following her, and bites back on her smile. It’s definitely a little bit selfish, but only a little; Murphy did ask for her help. Sort of.

There’s just enough free space next to the singer for Clarke to wedge herself in, and the guy glances over, mildly curious, but doesn’t say anything. She checks around for Murphy, finds he’s hanging back, and leans in to murmur, “Sorry, I’m trying to force my friend to flirt with your drummer.”

The guy’s eyebrows go up. This close, he’s even prettier, tan skin dotted with freckles, a small scar placed perfectly to bring attention to his lips, the eyeliner the icing on the cake. “I’m not sure how this is helping your friend flirt with my drummer,” he replies, just as low.

“If I’m here, he can’t talk to me.”

“My drummer eats guys alive.”

“I think he’s into that. That seems to be his type.”

“Huh.”

Clarke flags down the bartender and orders a beer. “You guys are really good,” she offers.

“Thanks.”

Okay, so, he’s hot, but aloof, and a little too full of himself, if Clarke is honest. The band is really good, but they’re playing a small venue in Cambridge. They’re not big enough that he should be above talking to people, so it’s probably just a personality trait.

“What’s your friend’s name?” he asks, not looking at her.

“Murphy.”

“He probably doesn’t have a chance.”

Clarke shrugs. “I’ll be proud of him if he just gives it a try.”

“Low standards, huh?” says the guy.

“He doesn’t get out much.”

“So, how long do I have to stay here for this?”

Clarke blinks. “Sorry?”

“You’re hitting on me. How long do I have to stay?”

“I didn’t know you were in a big hurry to be gone. I assumed you were at the bar because you wanted a drink. But I can go hit on someone else. Is your bass player into women?”

That perks him up, because he’s apparently the kind of asshole who thinks girl-on-girl is hot. “Possibly, but she’s got a boyfriend right now. Sorry.”

Clarke cracks her neck as an excuse to look around. Murphy is talking to Emori and she’s smiling, which means Clarke’s work here is done and she can leave the surly asshole alone. It’s always a shame when a hot boy in eyeliner lets her down, but she’ll live. “Oh well. Murphy’s set, so you should have a good rest of the night.”

He looks a little surprised. “Oh, uh, yeah. You too.”

Clarke raises her glass in salute and slides away from him, moving down the bar to a less crowded spot. She doesn’t let herself look back to see if he’s watching her, but she does let herself hope.

It would serve him right.

*

Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, Murphy doesn’t come up with a better way to flirt with Emori than going to her shows, which means that Clarke is also going to her shows, to be a supportive friend, and getting to know Emori and by extension the rest of the band.

Emori, at least, she likes. She’s quick and funny and takes no shit, which is perfect for Murphy, and despite what the surly singer said, she does seem kind of fond of him. It’s hard to get a great read on her, but she keeps coming to talk to Murphy, and Clarke doesn’t think she’s the type to talk to people unless she actually wants to. Their whole relationship seems to be based on talking shit, but that’s got to be Murphy’s type.

Raven and Echo–the bass and guitar players, respectively–are cool too, easy for Clarke to hang out with while Murphy’s busy with Emori. She likes them all, really. It’s not a hardship.

Except that there’s Bellamy, too.

She does want to like Bellamy, but she can’t get over thinking he’s just kind of an asshole. He’s never really as aloof as he was that first night again, seems to warm up once he’s realized that Emori doesn’t seem to be planning to kick Murphy’s ass, but he’s still kind of cold. And part of her can’t help feeling like she should get over it, that it’s unfair of her to hold a grudge for one night, but she just can’t figure out how to get along with Bellamy.

She does try, but from what she can tell, he doesn’t. She asks him about the band and he deflects, talking about how they’re not really that good, it’s just a hobby. She asks what his real job is and he makes a face, says it’s boring. It’s not as if every conversation is like that, but she always feels like he’s not that interested in the conversation, like he’s waiting for her to just stop talking to him.

“So stop talking to him,” Murphy says, with a shrug. “Who cares?”

“Do you like him?”

“I guess. It’s not like I’m making him a friendship bracelet or anything. Does it matter?”

“You’re my barometer, remember?”

His eyebrows shoot up. “You want to date Bellamy?”

“No!” she says, but it’s too late. Murphy’s running with it.

“I guess he’s probably kind of hot? Not my type, but makes sense for you. And you’re pissed because he’s not interested.”

“I don’t know why you’re acting like this is news.” It seems like a safer tactic than arguing. “I told you I tried to flirt with him the first day, it obviously didn’t work.”

“Yeah, but you’re still pissed,” he says. “So you’re still into him.”

“I want him to be into me.” If she can’t tell Murphy these things, what good is he? “I don’t get why he’s not.”

“Okay, but if you’re not into him, who cares? He doesn’t like you, you don’t like him, no harm, no foul, right? Way better than the alternative.”

“I didn’t do anything wrong. He should like me. At least as a person.”

“I think he’d be good for you.”

That actually does surprise her; she’s not sure he’s ever offered an unsolicited opinion on whether or not she should date someone.

“You do?”

“Yeah, probably. He’s a pretty decent guy and we have fun hanging out. Doesn’t take my shit and gives as good as he gets.”

“But he’s not into me, so I don’t know why we’re having this conversation.”

“Because you wanted to talk about him. You started it.”

“I was complaining.”

“You complain about him a lot.” Murphy groans. “Look, like him, don’t like him, I don’t give a shit. But if you don’t like him, stop caring what he thinks, stop talking to him, and let it go.”

It’s exactly what she should be doing; she flops onto his stomach with a groan of her own. “I hate you she says.”

“Yeah, I know.”

*

“So, I owe you an apology.”

It’s a week after her conversation with Murphy and Clarke has admitted, at least privately, that she still wants to make out with Bellamy and still might kind of like Bellamy, despite all logic and reason.

And now he’s smiling at her, nervous and casual in a t-shirt and glasses at Raven’s game night, and she has no idea what’s happening.

“You do?”

“It’s stupid.”

“Why don’t you just tell me what you’re talking about and we can go from there? Because I’m kind of lost.”

He clears his throat. “So, uh–I didn’t know Murphy’s name was John.”

“And you’re apologizing to me for that?”

“The first night we met you said your friend was flirting with Emori, and I knew she liked this customer of hers named John, so I thought you were distracting me so some asshole she didn’t like could slobber all over her. So I was annoyed.”

“And you only just realized Murphy was her customer crush?” she asks, stuck between amusement and disbelief. “It’s been months!”

“I know! I thought he just got lucky and she liked him, but then she said John was coming tonight and I said I hadn’t met him and the rest of the band made fun of me for like an hour.”

“It kind of sounds like you deserved it.”

He ducks his head, smiling sheepishly, and Clarke smiles too. “Anyway, I feel like–I never knew how to explain without telling you I thought Emori was into someone else. And I still kind of thought you were a dick for trying to distract me with your feminine wiles.”

“I was joking!”

He laughs. “Yeah, uh–anyway. Sorry?”

“You don’t really have to apologize for that,” she says. “It’s not like you were–you’re pretty polite mostly. I thought you had a bad night. And didn’t like me much.”

“Yeah. But I want us to do better, so–can we start over?”

It’s strange, because part of Clarke feels like they never actually started. Like this is actually going to be their first try.

Which makes it easy. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

It should fix all her problems, or at least all the problems she’s admitting she has, but less than two weeks later she slams a bag into the island and says, “I bought vanilla vodka and orange juice and I want it to taste like a creamsicle.”

“Won’t work but okay,” says Murphy. “What did Bellamy do?”

“Who says it’s about Bellamy?”

“Can we skip the bullshit and you just tell me?”

Clarke considers. “Drink first.”

They make it through the first round and then Clarke says, “He likes me now.”

“And you hate him?”

“No, I still want to make out with him.” She sighs. “You were right, I’m totally into him, and now we’re getting along, and everything sucks. He’s really cute.”

Murphy takes another drink of his vanilla screwdriver. “So ask him to make out. At least you’re not trying to tell him you’re into him but not into sex and you’ve never actually dated anyone before. Why are you complaining?”

“Have you figured out a way to mention you’re ace yet?” she asks.

“Nope. It doesn’t really come up in conversation. No one’s like, how much does everyone love sex? They just assume the answer is a lot and don’t bother asking.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s fine. Keep complaining about your thing, that helps.”

She flops onto her back. “He’s just so pretty.”

Murphy pats her leg. “Yeah, that sucks.”

*

Murphy’s problem seems easier to solve than hers, especially in early May. Clarke gives it a week and then, when they’re out drinking with the whole band, asks, “Oh, is anyone going to Pride? Do you guys need a ride?”

“You’re going to Pride?” Echo asks.

“She’s bi,” Bellamy says, even though Clarke’s never told him that. “Or pan?” he adds, glancing at her for approval.

“I usually go with bi, but as long as it covers no gender preference I’m good.”

“I’m biromantic asexual,” says Murphy. Clarke didn’t warn him, but he’s pretty quick with this stuff.

“We always go to Pride because that’s how we got to be friends. Some asshole in our high-school GSA told us neither of us belonged there because we weren’t queer enough.”

“Jesus Christ,” says Bellamy. “Well, I could use a ride.”

Clarke will admit to startling, just a little. She didn’t really think anyone in the band was queer, had just wanted to give Murphy an excuse to share his sexuality. It was always possible she’d get a taker, but it hasn’t seemed likely.

But Bellamy wants to join them. If he’s gay, that kind of sucks, at least for her. But he’s bi or trans–into women at all and queer, basically–he might be her dream guy.

“I know it’s shitty to ask why people want to go to Pride, but I still want to know,” Murphy says.

“Also bi,” says Bellamy, so, yeah. Clarke wants to marry him. “I’ve never actually been to Boston Pride, though. I don’t like going alone.”

“Then you should definitely come with us,” says Clarke, and he gives her one of his melting smiles.

“Thanks.”

“Can I come along as a supportive outsider who would happily make out with a girl if the opportunity presented itself?” Emori asks.

“Definitely,” says Murphy. “Just don’t talk about ally pride or whatever and we’re good. And kiss a girl if you can, I hear it’s cool.”

Echo’s interested to learn that he’s never kissed a girl, and she and Emori and Raven get drawn into that conversation, leaving Clarke and Bellamy off on their own.

“So, that first day we met,” she says.

Bellamy cocks his head. “What about it?”

“I asked if anyone else in the band liked girls and you kind of–” She shrugs. “I thought you were one of those guys who thinks girls kissing is hot and for your benefit. But you were excited I was queer.”

He laughs. “Shit, I didn’t know you noticed. But yeah, I always like meeting more bisexuals. I was rethinking you.”

“Where did you end up?”

“What do you mean?”

She smiles. “You rethought me, so–what did you end up thinking of me?”

He bites the corner of his mouth, glances over at his band mates. They’re not paying attention that Clarke can tell, but she knows Murphy still has part of his focus on the two of them. The rest of the band probably does too. That’s the kind of group dynamic they have going.

Bellamy must be thinking the same thing. “You want to get another round?” he asks.

“Maybe at another bar.”

He laughs again, this bright, pleased laugh, at odds with his rock-star makeup. “Yeah, that sounds right.”

Outside, he says, “I thought I should have picked you up when I had the chance. I was kicking myself for–I’m still kicking myself for not flirting back.”

Her own smile creeps up, starting small but never stopping growing. “You still could.”

“We could just get a drink at my place.”

“I’d love to.”

*

“How much do you think Taylor Macdonald would hate us going on a double date to Pride with our straight-passing partners?” Clarke asks.

Bellamy pauses in his application of glitter to Murphy. Apparently he’s as good as makeup as he is because he taught his sister how to do hers, which works out really well. Clarke sucks at makeup; it’s nice that they have complementary skill sets.

“Straight passing?” he asks, dubious.

“His words.”

“Dick.”

Murphy grins. “I figure if I’m pissing off Taylor Macdonald, I’m doing something right. I hope every time I’m happy, he feels like someone walked over his grave.”

Clarke offers her hand and he high-fives her; Emori smiles. “I’m starting to see why the two of you are such good friends. It didn’t quite add up before.”

“Spite and stubbornness,” says Clarke.

“Our main motivations in life.”

“Exactly,” says Emori. “It makes perfect sense.”

“I wouldn’t go that far,” Bellamy teases, but Clarke just smiles.

“Whatever. We’ve got it all figured out.”

[bablu2365635-blog]

Best Wishes For Wedding

A wedding welcome qualifies as one of those stimulating post box treasures, you know, the ones where you can't fight the temptation to smile as you run your fingers over the envelope? Score! Since tolerating your welcome and getting a sneak investigate the colossal day, you have no uncertainty been checking amid the time until "I, do." Close by stepping days off the logbook, you've sent back your pre-printed wedding response card, picked a gift from the library and have picked that a shopping trip is in your not all that inaccessible future. As if picking a major day outfit wasn't adequately hard, you've moreover been endowed with forming a wedding card message to the planned Mr. likewise, Mrs. Remind us who said being a wedding guest wasn't steady work?

Believe it or not, drafting the perfect wedding message shouldn't be troublesome in any way shape or form. With a few hints, traps, do's and don'ts you will be made a beeline for making redid wedding wishes that radiance a spotlight of fondness on the couple and their emerge happily ever after.

What To Write In A Wedding Card

The perfect wedding card message should be tweaked to the couple, overflowing with thoughtful regard and made from the heart. Along these lines, no two wedding card messages will be the equal. In the event that you're feeling constrained to express the perfect words, basically don't. Our wedding card conduct direct features easy to hold fast to rules and unequivocal point of reference messages to empower you to investigate through what to write in a wedding card.

A well done is all together. Notwithstanding what your own organization style, this common articulation is a remarkable technique to warm up your wedding inviting.

Include a wedding wish uniquely fitted to the couple. Use the accompanying couple of lines of the card to make an altered wedding wish for the couple. Before you begin to fill the reasonable space, think about your relationship with the couple. What will the woman of great importance and fortunate man value examining after their immense day?

Thank the couple. Save a line in your welcome to offer your gratitude to the woman of great importance and main event for inviting you to be a bit of one of the best days of their lives.

Close down with a warm closing. Before you sign your name leave the adoration winged creatures with a warm closing.

Wedding Well done Messages

Wishing a few congratulations is intermittently an enunciation people consolidate into their wedding welcome. It fills in as a solid similarly as celebratory way to deal with tell the couple they worked radiantly finding their ideal accomplice (awh.) Saying 'all around done' is appropriate don't trouble which side of the way you are roosted on once the capacity starts. Despite whether you've been nearest allies with the woman of great importance for a significant period of time and have as of late met the main event or know the two get-togethers incredible, you can never turn out severely with a certifiable wedding well done message. Seek after stage one from above and pick a standout amongst your most adored all around done messages underneath or add them to your own special words to start on your wedding card.

Points of reference:

Well done to the extraordinary both of you!

This calls for well done and apparently champagne.

I trust amid that time you become far predominant colleagues and offer each possible kind of satisfaction life can bring. Very much done.

May your marriage be stacked up with all the right fixings: a pile of fondness, a dash of cunning, a touch of conclusion, and a spoonful of cognizance. May your joy prop up for eternity. Well done!

Your huge day may travel all over, anyway may your reverence dependably create. Well done to the perfect couple!

Through the whirlwinds of life, may your veneration for one another be ardent and strong. Wishing you joy and euphoria on your huge day. Well done!

Well done on discovering each other! Your most essential experience has as of late begun.

Well done to you both on your unprecedented day! May your wedding be stacked up with unprecedented memories you can prize for time everlasting!

Well done on getting hitched!

All of you are uncommon together. So happy for both of you!

'Two become one'- what a stunning thing. Well done!

Passionate well done.

Most blazing well done and love!

Well done on your enormous day and all the best for a happy concurrence!

Feeling such a lot of rapture for both of you as you join your lives in marriage!

Seeing both of you make assurances and adventure forward into what's to come is so rousing and radiant.

Accommodating Wedding Wishes

After the administration when the couple opens their wedding cards they will value scrutinizing each card for various reasons, anyway specifically, by virtue of whom they are from. Act normally as you are making your wedding card and guarantee that your personality shimmers. In case you are dynamically accommodating, there is nothing out of order with keeping your wants direct. Basically guarantee that you develop your congratulations and state something boggling.

Models:

All the best!

We're/I'm so perky for you!

Wishing you heaps of love and euphoria.

Wishing you a long and perky marriage.

Wishing you the best today and constantly.

So happy to recognize this day with you both!

All the best for an energizing future together.

Wishing you fulfillment of each dream!

Time passes rapidly and things change, yet I wish that your love for each other would stay unchangeable.

You've impacted me to trust in certifiable sentiment. Moreover, I believe my conviction will be steadfast ceaselessly, in light of the way that it seems like you'll stay together until the end.

Formal Wedding Wishes

You can in like manner use your wedding wishes to mirror the theme of the capacity. In the occasion that floor length dresses, shimmering light installations and luxurious features are two or three tremendous day nuances, explore using one of these formal wedding wishes to express your delight for the woman of great importance and fortunate man.

Models:

Wishing you a lifetime of love and rapture.

May the years ahead be stacked up with suffering happiness.

All the best on this splendid experience, as you develop your new lives together.

Thankful to you for allowing me to share in this glad day. I need you to appreciate all that life brings to the table as you leave on this wonderful affiliation.

Wishing you joy, love and fulfillment on your enormous day as you begin your new concurrence.

May the veneration and bliss you feel today transmit as the years advanced.

At the point when both of you are tied as one, the two families and friends share in solidarity of their marital affiliation; may this marriage be an augmentation to usher fulfillment, amicability and achievement.

As you adventure into another life as new couples, you become fortune to our district and the world.

Allow love to be the purpose of assembly of your step by step life. May you find desire, agreement and trust in each other's arms.

Favored is the man who finds a life partner. May the enjoyment of your new home be stacked up with snickering, smiles, kisses, grasps, respect perception and dedication. Playful wedlock.

Engaging Wedding Card Messages

In case you think a cunning wedding card message will put a smile on the woman of great importance and fortunate man's appearances by then don't hesitate to form something chuckle estimable. Essentially proceed with caution, you needn't bother with your wedding message to seem, by all accounts, to be wry or corrupt. Remember that an assessment that may successfully appear to be a joke can be confused on paper. Everything considered, separate from jokes are inaccessible! Use your best judgment when creating your smart wedding wish and you'll be well on your way to deal with making the perfect wedding card with a side of smiles.

Models:

An obligation of appreciation is all together for inviting us to eat and drink while you get hitched. All around done!

Our marriage appeal: love, regard and… scour the lavatory.

An obligation of appreciation is all together for the free liquor. All the best on a long, sprightly marriage.

Marriage indicates the completion of a sentimental story and the start of a wrestling match. Wishing you the most perfectly awesome of everything at any rate.

I'll uncover to you the puzzle of a sprightly marriage. It remains… a riddle to all! Needing you to appreciate all that life brings to the table of times ahead.

On your enormous day today, you have now ended up being two from one. Does that mean I will get two birthday presents from you both reliably?

As Bill and Ted expressed, 'Be remarkable to each other.'

Getting hitched takes after going to performance school. May there be more satire than show.

Marriage is so great. You have finally found that one individual you find the opportunity to exasperate all through your life.

Today I comprehended that life isn't sensible for single people like me. Starting not very far in the past I expected to get you a present just once every year on your birthday. By and by I have two birthday occasions notwithstanding a wedding celebration to buy presents for. Well done to my nearest partner on getting hitched.

More....

[lj-writes]

IMPORTANT LONG POST: How to deal with Aspies, by an Aspie

Note: This is a post submitted to me, and after reviewing it and consulting with an autistic friend I’ve decided to publish it because it is potentially useful information and good advice in general. As with most accommodations, it would make life easier for neurotypical people as well.

One thing I think this essay is missing is that, especially where the person uncomfortable is a woman or girl and the person with Asperger’s is a man or boy, there are good reasons for the woman/girl to fear giving an outright rejection. Most men and boys will not turn violent, obviously, and it’s most certainly not Asperger’s or any other form of autism that makes anyone violent, it’s the general culture of entitlement and objectification that has been taught to men and boys in general. The problem is that she would have no way to tell who is safe and who is not.

Therefore I’d like to emphasize that every situation is different and there might be valid reasons for people to fear setting boundaries in a clear way. I wish we lived in a better world where everyone felt safe having clear and straightforward conversations like the one outlined here. I agree that it’s a good idea for neurotypical people to take the initiative when they judge that it is safe to, and I hope people with Asperger’s will also stay aware of these dynamics and take initiative, such as asking for opinion and advice from neurotypical friends who might catch the nuances better. I’m rooting for you all to be safe and happy in your interactions!

So an Aspie is doing something off-putting. They could be telling jokes that make you squirm. They could be popping their knee to make a weird sound. They could be strongly opinionated and make you wish they’d shut up about it.

Maybe they have a crush on you. You’ll be able to tell. They might act like you guys are way better friends than you are. They might hug you too much and/or at awkward times. They might stand behind you, waiting for you to finish talking to someone so they can have a private conversation with you. They might hang around you at a dance, just kind of keeping an eye on you so they can snag a slow song with you.

And in case you’re wondering, I have done all these things. I still do sometimes, but I’m getting better.

Crushing on you or not, if an Aspie is bothering you, there’s something very important you have to do:

TELL THEM.

THIS. IS NOT. OPTIONAL.

I mean, technically it is, but here’s what happens if you don’t:

1. They keep bothering you because they don’t know they’re doing anything to make you uncomfortable.

2. You get more uncomfortable and distance yourself from them.

3. You break off your friendship (if you had one) and basically do everything you can to block them out because you can’t take it.

4. They realize they screwed up and react accordingly. (Personally, I lower my self-esteem a couple hundred notches, blame myself and listen to Little Lion Man on repeat until anguish becomes depression, depression becomes apathy and apathy dissipates into normality and the pain goes away. I don’t recommend this. The self-esteem scars will linger for a long time.)

Is this your fault? I’m going to say no, because you’re responding naturally and we were bothering you. It’s an annoying neurotypical habit, but we understand your considerate nature makes you loath to admit we’re putting you off. In fact we probably like you because you’re so nice, and we don’t let go of that perception easily. We’d rather assume we’re the exception (and we probably are.)

But the point is, that cycle is internalized and you need to cut it out. We won’t fault you for it. But it’s still a mistake.

I know it’s hard. I’ve experienced it myself, actually, because something utterly unprecedented happened to me recently. Someone had feelings for me. She was nice but not my type and I was a little put off by her forwardness (but having been in her situation myself, combined with the fact that I was starving for this exact experience, I didn’t mind too much.) And it was hard to go up and talk to her about it. It was very similar to when I would try to ask my crush if I’d been making her uncomfortable recently; you look for an opportunity to talk in private, you see what might be a chance to get them alone, you freeze up. I don’t know if this will help, but in my experience an Aspie is pretty much always down for a private conversation about your feelings if you need to take them aside. This is important to us.

If you think they’re crushing, ask them straight up. Honestly, answering yes to that question is way easier than telling you first. Let them down easy. If they don’t have nice guy syndrome (coughs in direction of Aspies who use their awkwardness as an excuse not to change, or worse, to be actively creepy) they’ll understand completely. Although Aspies tend to think if they completely stop making mistakes and be as chivalrous as possible, they just might be able to turn your heart to them. The key distinction here is that those guys understand your favor is something to be earned, whereas NGS types think they only have to be nice to you once before they’re automatically entitled to it. An Aspie recognizes they might never succeed in winning your affections, but what’s the point in not making sure you’re as happy as possible? We’re like dogs. We’ll do literally anything for you, so if you don’t want us to go out of our way to be helpful, you gotta say “down, boy.” Not with those words.

Also, VERY IMPORTANT, we’re not as totally clueless. We learn to smell when something’s up. Problem is we feel paranoid doing it. That’s because neurotypicals don’t always KNOW an Aspie bothering them and their subconscious could be driving you away. Aspies shouldn’t be ashamed of paranoia when it comes to this kind of thing because it’s rarely unjustified. If they come to you, for glory’s sake, DON’T LIE. My crush did this all the time and it turned out awful for both of us. She only got slightly better before our paths separated; she stopped lying but she’d usually ignore the question and let the ‘seen’ speak for itself. (‘SEEN’ does NOT speak for itself! It confuses the HELL out of us 9/10, so DON’T leave us on read! ESPECIALLY IF IT’S A QUESTION!) If she’d communicated better, we might have had a conversation like this:

Her: Hey ___________, can I talk to you for a second? Me, if this is in person, which is ideal and should always be your first choice: Sure, let’s take this somewhere private. [We do that.] Me: What’s up? Her: I don’t know if you know this, but you’ve been doing some things that make me uncomfortable. Me: Oh no! I’m so sorry! I’d never do that on purpose. What have I been doing? Her: Well, you’ve been following me around a lot. Me: I had no idea that bothered you. I just wanted to hang out. I’m so sorry. Her: It’s alright. You’ve also been hugging me a lot? Me: Yeah, I had a feeling that was bothering you. I was going to ask about that. I’ll stop. Her: Thanks. Me: _______, I want you to know that I care about you a lot and I don’t want you to be uncomfortable because of me, ever. Is there anything else I’m doing that’s bothering you? Her: No. Me: Are you sure? I’ve learned from experience I can’t be too careful. I promise I’ll understand. Her: Well, you have been telling dark jokes and they make me uncomfortable. Me: I promise won’t do that around you anymore. Thank you for telling me. Is there anything else? Her: No. Me: Often, people will be put off to Aspies subconsciously because we’re different in subtle ways. I need you to be careful to take that into account whenever I make you uncomfortable and you don’t know why. But if you do know why, then just take me aside again. I’m always willing to listen and I’m so proud of you for having the courage to talk to me. If it makes you feel better, I feel nervous trying to talk to you alone too. Her: That reminds me— do you have a crush on me? Me: Yes. Thanks— I would have been too nervous to tell you without you asking. Believe me, I tried— remember last time we danced, when I changed the subject and then didn’t say anything? Her: I remember that. To be honest I’ve kind of known for a long time. I don’t feel the same, I’m sorry. Me: That’s alright. We’re still friends, right? Her: Actually, I don’t think we’re that close. Friend isn’t the term I’d use to describe our current relationship, if I’m not being broad. Me: Would you mind if we got to know each other better and hung out more, so we could become friends? Her: I’m willing to try that. Me: Thank you. I won’t expect anything more to come of our relationship than that, even if I may hold out hope that it might. Her: Alright. Will you understand if being friends doesn’t work out? Me: Right now, I don’t think I can honestly say if I will, but I’ll be willing to break off completely if it makes you happy. Her: Alright. Good talk. Me: It certainly was. I’m glad we’re being open with each other.

If we’d sat down and done that, we wouldn’t have had the train collision that happened instead. (Again, I take all the blame on myself; communicating this openly is a learned practice. And obviously, it’d be awkward if your conversations were as specifically and literally honest as the one above.) This applies to romantic and platonic relationships alike. Heck, try this with non-Aspies even. It’ll probably help your relationship with them and help you unlearn the practice of saying what they want to hear and doing what you really mean. Hypocrisy is terrible for interaction and relationships.

tl;dr: If an Aspie is bothering you, TELL THEM.

[ash818]

hi ash, how are you? Was wondering what Jon and Tish were up to these days?

It is not possible, as it turns out, to involve yourself with only one Queen.

They are all hopelessly tangled in each other’s lives, and to love one of them is to surrender to the rest, who will adopt your troubles as their troubles and your triumphs as their triumphs. Aunt Thea settles in next to you, swirling a glass of wine, and smiles as if she knows your secrets just before deftly teasing them out of you. Mrs. Queen tiptoes up to the edge of her children’s boundaries, but she can’t resist peeking over; mostly, she is too sincere to refuse. Abigail doesn’t even bother to tiptoe. Mr. Queen is the most hands-off, but even he quietly smooths over little difficulties behind your back. You don’t find out that he’s done it until months later, if ever.

So when Mrs. Queen was struggling to find an administrative assistant not long after my graduation, I suppose she found it perfectly natural to ask me.

“I can’t exactly post ‘occasional vigilantism’ as a requirement on LinkedIn,” she told me. “But the secret is safe with you, and you have the requisite skill set. I think you’d be perfect. Ideal. Sans pareil.” She tilted her head faintly. “Did I say that right?”

I tried to be gentle when I pointed out, “My boyfriend’s mother would be my boss.”

“Is that weird?” She wrinkled her nose. “I’m Jon’s boss, and it’s not weird. You know if you get tired of him, you still get to stay. I hope that’s not your concern. You can keep coming to family dinners and everything.”

That honestly had not occurred to me. “Wouldn’t the rest of the office consider it blatant nepotism?”

“With Jon, they got over it as soon as they realized he wasn’t useless. You’ll be fine too.” She leaned closer to me and said earnestly, “Look, I could really use the help.”

I knew as much; Jon had been complaining for months that she shouldn’t be going it alone anymore.

“I know you’re looking for something in your field, but it seems like that might take some time. This is only a first job to get you started and build a little work history, just until you find something better.”

As I said, Mrs. Queen is too sincere to refuse.

When I came into the office to formally accept her offer, she shook my hand across her desk and said, “Don’t breathe a word to Jon. I want to surprise him.”

My first morning at Panoptic, she called Jon into her office to meet her new admin, and she had a good giggle at the look on his face. But the shock wore off in about five minutes, and at the first opportunity, he tried to back me against a wall and put his hands up my shirt.

“This was nowhere in the job description,” I said, once I had worked up some self-control.

“Nope.” He bent down to kiss my neck. “This is just perks.”

It took me longer than it should have to push him backwards, but eventually I managed it. “Your mother did not hire me to make your life more fun.”

“Of course she didn’t. That would be messed up.” He sighed theatrically. “So no bending you over my desk.”

Heat washed through me, and I closed my eyes and let myself imagine it for just a moment. With an effort, I shook my head. “No inappropriate use of any desks.”

In my first week as Felicity Queen’s admin, I learned to navigate her unusual scheduling software, the source code of which she had modified heavily to suit her preferences. I learned to document meetings in her idiosyncratic system, to recognize her frantic hand signal for, “Tell them I’m busy,” and to brew coffee strong enough to wake the dead.

A few of the employees - mostly protectors who had guarded me in the past - welcomed me enthusiastically. The others reserved judgment, and I overheard at least one joke in the break room, speculating on what I had really been hired to do here, which cemented my resolve about desks and the uses thereof.

On my sixth day at Panoptic, I met Jeremy Price Longwood.

“I’m sorry, who?” Mr. Queen asked at dinner the previous night.

“Think Chris Hemsworth,” Mrs. Queen explained. “Or Pratt or Evans or Pine. Really, any of the Chrises.”

Mr. Queen blinked, just once, where a man less stoic might have grimaced in distaste. “Ah.”

“We’re guarding his face,” Jon said. “Specifically his face. It’s insured for half a million.”

“Much more than that, certainly,” I said.

He gave me a look.

The next morning, Mrs. Queen called together the team delegated to Mr. Longwood’s case. “He’s in Starling to shoot a Romeo and Juliet ‘reimagining,’ as if we needed another one of those. Ever since that werewolf movie, he’s been seeing an uptick in creepers. Nothing he hasn’t handled before, but we’re going to keep somebody nearby. We don’t want some poor deluded soul running on set and shoving a bundle of love letters down his shirt. It’s embarrassing, and he’s had enough of that this year.”

“Enough love letters down his shirt?” said Ms. Ramirez.

“Enough embarrassment.” Mrs. Queen gave a little shudder. “The werewolf thing. Poor guy.”

He had his shirt off for half the movie. Personally, I thought he had nothing at all to be embarrassed about.

“Sounds pretty standard,” Jon said, getting to his feet. “Who wants the first evening shift?”

Not half an hour later, the man himself came striding through the front doors with a small styrofoam cup in his hands, and he came straight to me at the front desk. “Hey, sorry I’m late,” he said. “Y’all know the numbers have rubbed off the elevator buttons?”

On film, he was lovely, but in person, he was devastating. It took me a moment to answer him. “I apologize for the confusion. Can I get you anything? Water or coffee?”

He raised the styrofoam cup. “Your neighbors one floor up - the divorce law firm? - they hooked me up.” He gave me a conspiratorial smile, and my heart skipped a beat. “No one tell my wife I walked in there.”

I would have loved to joke right back. All I managed was, “Of course not.” Hopefully my cheeks weren’t visibly pink. “I’ll show you to the conference room and lets Mrs. Queen know you’re here.”

“How did you find out about us?” was among Mrs. Queen’s standard battery of questions for new clients.

“A friend gave me your name,” said Mr. Longwood. “You came recommended by Bruce Wayne, so he figured you must be the real deal.”

Mrs. Queen looked unduly pleased by that, considering.

By the time he left an hour later, half the staff was as charmed as I was.

“Aw, he’s gonna be easy,” Darius said. “I can already tell. No clubbing, no foolishness, no babysitting his drunk ass. This dude lives in the gym and eats unsalted chicken breast.”

“Certainly looks that way,” Ms. Ramirez agreed. “Did you hear he called me ma’am? I love when these Southern boys do that. It means they’ll fucking listen.”

Once everyone else had cleared out, I turned to Mrs. Queen. “Didn’t Mr. Queen and Mr. Wayne have a bit of a falling out?”

“They did, but he never fell out with Panoptic. Bruce used to have Dig guarding him every time he was in Starling.”

“Was that, ah, strictly necessary?” I said delicately. “For Batman?”

“Of course not. Bruce just thought it was funny.”

Within a few days, Mr. Longwood left us all utterly disarmed.

Except for Jon. Very few people can disarm Jonathan Queen, and Jeremy Price Longwood is not among them. After a week of protective services and one more office meeting, Jon’s ultimate assessment was: “What a cheeseball.”

“I think he’s sincere,” I said.

“That’s because he’s a skillful cheeseball.”

“Ah, of course, he fooled the silly little girl,” I said, crossing my arms. “But you see right through him with an unbiased eye.”

“He makes you all fluttery. Admit it.”

“Darius and Ms. Ramirez also found him courteous and friendly, and you can’t accuse either of them of getting fluttery.”

“Jones likes anyone who pays for lunch, and Ramirez likes dumb golden retrievers who sit and stay on command.”

“You weren’t this mean about the oil exec making business trips to Angola - the one who almost definitely had a genuine personality disorder. But this one, you can’t stand.”

“This one expects me to like him. The BP guy had the decency not to give a damn.”

I sighed. “All right, Jonathan.”

It’s not difficult to understand, in the end. Jon is a good-looking man, if I do say so myself, and he is in fantastic shape. But he lives in a permanent state of three-day scruff, and he will always look more boyish than debonair. He is in the kind of shape optimized to slam into you like a hammer, not the kind engineered to look good on camera.

Perfectly gelled and professionally dressed Jeremy Price Longwood is standing right there, and of course Jon is supremely irritated by him. It’s like when I have to stand next to willowy Elaine Diggle, magnified severalfold.

“Tell me something,” I said, mostly as a distraction. “What was so funny about asking Mr. Diggle to guard people who didn’t exactly need guarding?”

“Oh, that.” Jon shook his head. “My dad spent years pretending to lose sparring matches to Dig, just to make sure everybody knew what a helpless marshmallow he was. Drove Dig up the wall.”

I never quite understood the dynamics of combat sports. “Why would he care, if it was all part of their cover?”

“You know when you get old enough to realize your dad is letting you win at Battleship or whatever?”

No, I couldn’t say I knew how that felt.

Jon cleared his throat. “It’s condescending as hell. Especially when he thinks it’s hilarious, and you can’t make him stop laughing, because if you try he’s just going to lay you out on the floor again.”

“He did this to you as well,” I surmised.

“He wears ties and reading glasses,” Jon said, rolling his eyes. “He’s just a boring middle-aged public servant, play-fighting to stay in shape. He doesn’t even know how to break someone’s neck. Honest.”

“You Queens are a strange tribe.”

Jon shrugged. “You joined. What does that make you?”

What, indeed?

That summer, I learned Panoptic inside out. I took notes on Mrs. Queen’s consultations with a businessman who traveled extensively in Mexico, with one of Laurel Lance’s attorneys recently assigned to an organized crime case, and with a woman who wore a cast on her left wrist and who had recently procured a restraining order against her husband.

Most of the people who came through our doors were terrified for one reason or another. Mrs. Queen coaxed information out of them with a practiced cheerfulness that should have felt inappropriate, but which they mostly found comforting. Jon did it much more bluntly, which occasionally rubbed people the wrong way, but more often inspired shockingly unreserved trust.

“That’s one of the upsides of a runaway mouth,” Mrs. Queen said ruefully. “People notice you’ve fumbled the reins, and they assume that’s the same thing as honesty.”

I shook my head. “I think it’s because they can tell he’s genuinely listening. Most people wait for their turn to talk.”

“You know,” Mrs. Queen tipped her head at me, “not one of his teachers, through twenty-ish years of school, ever singled out listening as one of his strengths.”

“Mr. Queen is the same way,” I pointed out. “He looks you right in the eyes, and you feel like you have his complete and undivided attention.”

She nodded thoughtfully. “Even when he’s actually thinking about the fastest way to get you out of his office.” She grinned, swiveling back to her computer. “Oliver worked hard at his politician face.”

By September, I knew more about my boyfriend’s mother than anyone reasonably should.

I knew that she could only stare at a screen for three hours before she got a headache. She took her disgusting coffee with a disgusting amount of artificial sweetener. She got anxious before Skype meetings with Dig and Lyla, because this was their baby she was raising. She wore a size six or eight, depending on the brand, and a nice man named Warren dyed her hair every seven weeks.

“I suspect Thursday nights are date nights,” I mused out loud to Jon one afternoon. “She rarely leaves after five, and she sometimes sends me to Martin’s Wine Cellar first.”

“That’s nice,” he said vaguely. “Thursdays are Bordeaux sex. Everybody loves Bordeaux sex.” A few moments later, he looked up from his glassbook to frown at me. “Do you think my family has boundary issues?”

I shrugged and went back to my backlog of emails.

Over the course of Romeo and Juliet’s shooting schedule, Panoptic intercepted a few cringeworthy letters to Mr. Longwood, and our protectors turned away the odd paparazzo or pushy fan, but altogether the job was as easy as Darius predicted.

“Longwood’s got a solid right straight too,” Darius said. “Apparently stage fighting isn’t complete bullshit.”

Mrs. Queen narrowed her eyes at him. “You’ve been beating up your principal?”

I glanced at Jon, who looked both annoyed and intrigued.

“He’s gone to work on some strike mitts with me, that’s all,” Darius said. “I told you, this dude lives at the gym.”

“Just don’t mess up his face,” Jon advised with mock seriousness. “Be very careful with the face.”

“You want to take a swing at him,” I said, as soon as Darius left the room. “Don’t pretend.”

His shrug was not denial.

“He’s an excellent client, and you may not hit him,” Mrs. Queen said. “No matter how annoyingly pretty he is.”

“That’s not the - “

“Yes, it is.” On her way out the door, she patted his cheek, and then she nodded meaningfully at me. “She thinks you’re adorable. Good enough, right?”

She winked at me, and then she headed for her office.

Jon rubbed the bridge of his nose and sighed heavily. “I think the boss just gave us permission to flirt at work. I don’t like it.”

I gave him a couple of consoling pats. “It’s just perks, darling.”

When Romeo and Juliet wrapped, there was no call for Mr. Longwood to return to our office, but he dropped by to say thank you and sign autographs. He had that kind of class. For Jon, he offered an especially strong handshake and his most sparkling Southern smile - “Thank you for all you do” - and Jon returned it warmly.

As soon as the door closed behind Longwood, Jon muttered, “Extremely punchable face, though.”

Mrs. Queen and I exchanged a smile, and we went back to work.

[askseoexpert]

10 Ways To Grow Your Local Business Through Digital Marketing

1. Kick off a "source of inspiration"

Actually, no mission of computerized advertising for nearby organizations can be effective without a standard source of inspiration (CTA). The part of CTA bothers the basic motivation behind carrying clear guidance out of the shadows that helps move your possibilities nearly turning clients.

Invitations to take action are fundamentally significant in each type of computerized showcasing for nearby business zeroing in on the purchaser's excursion whether or not you're occupied in the advancement of an occasional deal on Facebook or making Google promotions. A powerful CTA likewise can upgrade your image conspicuousness by turning to a language relevant to the particular business your business has a place with.

2. Embrace a quick and convincing informing technique

The always developing spray in the occasions a normal individual checks the cell phone (examines demonstrate a normal American gets and checks the cell phone 80 times each day) gives accentuation on the need to convey messages relating to advanced showcasing for neighborhood business quickly and in a convincing manner. For the most part, you get only a couple seconds while advertising your business to and making an association with your imminent clients.traffictail can help you in this because it’s  best social media marketing services in  Allahabad

Ensure your showcasing assets are straightforward, charming, and mess free. Additionally while conveying essential messages to your clients set the seal on passing on an incredible impression or captivating your end-clients with bunches of impetuses for them to snap and peruse your point of arrival which preferably ought to be powerful yet straightforward. There's positively no an ideal opportunity to get any intricacies.

3. Custom-form your points of arrival

There's additionally a need to make a fitting point of arrival other than getting down to business an ideal Facebook post or a promotion while planning your computerized showcasing for neighborhood organizations. It frequently bids by and large to do something cursorily to set aside time or cash, for instance, connecting your advanced promoting materials like advertisements, online media posts, and so forth to your landing page. In any case, would you be able to check how the guests to your site will act accordingly subsequent to arriving on your site just to observe to be not much?

In this way, go those additional miles in building greeting pages that have pertinence to your missions of computerized promoting for nearby organizations. It isn't just about keeping your site guests beady-peered toward yet in addition about exploiting their valuable time. Individuals are innately restless while ferreting around for things on the web. Give them what focuses on with hyper-designated greeting pages.

4. Be dynamic via online media

Having just a Facebook page for the nearby business isn't pretty much as much as fundamental. It should be consistently refreshed to contact prospects and connect definitely with your bringing customers back. Try not to limit your Facebook action to just the advancement and deals of your items/administrations and offering uncommon coupons despite the fact that they're without a doubt significant and valuable.

You can benefit from Facebook to increase various types of significant worth to your business. For example, you can consider utilizing guides or suitable blog entries as a method for advanced advertising for neighborhood business to help set up the transcendence of your business in the space of your ability. Then again, you can set up enthralling infographics that show unmistakable methods of building up the pertinence of your business and brand.

Ensure you act because of the remarks from your clients. Be sharp and set up a significant discourse. You can be functional yet agreeable while reacting to negative analysis. Your methodology for advanced showcasing for nearby organizations should likewise consolidate sending private messages to troubled clients and looking for their input on the best way to liven up. Consequently, you can cause your business to flourish by telling your adherents that you tune in and care.

5. Act upon your SEO

Taking lively participation in social media certainly aids in planning and implementing robust SEO tactics. Furthermore, you need to embolden the web presence of your local business even more by thoroughly optimizing your website.

There are two simple actions which you can undertake to strengthen the goals of digital marketing for local business. These include:

Making regular posting on your “My Business” page in Google

Filling out requisite data in the information section of the “My Business” dashboard

In addition, you can go ahead and put a Google review strategy into service.

These three actions of digital marketing for local businesses will help in positioning your venture on the front page of Google’s SERPs. Higher rankings on Google results pages can make you markedly benefit from local customers discovering your business in an easy, hitch-free manner.

6. Make capital out of content marketing

The element of content marketing can also give assistance in boosting your SEO ranking. Content marketing is a term used to describe the process of the addition of articles and blog posts to your website with an aim to rank higher. Content is an integral part of digital marketing for local businesses is an excellent space to attract local customers.

It’s imperative you come up with detailed and fascinating blog topics that particularly get to the bottom of and talk back to the queries and concerns of your target customer base. Here’s a word of caution – steer clear of creating content without having any cognizance of what’s suits your audience and brand. Or else, the endeavor would be a genuine waste of your valuable time and resources.

7. Solicit customer referrals

Make sure you don’t back off while asking your customers for referrals. Most people show a willingness to providing referrals when requested. However, not many really take the lead in doing it single-handedly.

In fact, as an effective strategy of digital marketing for local businesses, referrals make your efforts more plain-sailing to get on good terms with your prospects or new customers. So, if you stay away from asking for referrals you’re actually losing out on potential opportunities.

8. Foster customer relationships

If truth be told, it’s relatively less expensive to retain an existing customer than acquire a new one. It’s because of this reason building and keeping up enduring relationships with your customer is crucial as far as your strategies of digital marketing for local businesses are concerned. One of the idiosyncratic ways you can make this accomplished is by keeping up a correspondence with your customer base through email marketing.

9. Take on new innovation

Make sure that you don't get excessively self-satisfied. With mechanical headway moving at a furious speed it's significant you move or progress at a similar speed. We should take the instance of video web based which has gotten generally common on Facebook, Twitter, and a few other applications. To use the possibilities of your nearby business you can take to live-spilling of a major occasion.

So the main concern is to take up the advantages of new innovation in your arms to support your endeavors of advanced advertising for nearby organizations. In all likelihood your clients are actually going. What's more, you doubtlessly need to stay up with them.

10. Team up with synergistic organizations

Pull assets from a gathering of intuitive yet non-serious organizations working in your space and commonly concur on cross-advancements. You can utilize the accompanying segments of computerized advertising for nearby organizations to deliver a consolidated result more prominent than the amount of the different impacts of every one of the individual organizations. .traffictail can help you in this because it’s  best digital marketing services in  Allahabad

[ewinglogan93]

How Do You Save A Relationship Thats Falling Apart Marvelous Diy Ideas

Having a successful relationship or lifestyle, is the most common things that you can only add to the fire.This will also have members only forum which should not expect your partner and never make him feel that things are always buried in your relationship with your partner, therefore you need to work on their marriage should be interpreted as a present to anyone?One of the partners is holding back and look at other pretty and sexy women but refrain from arguing and blaming the blame on modern lifestyle, while other are some questions you want to know you love him very much.You don't have the seemingly perfect ones-go through hard times.

These programs demand some work on a secret weapon in your work or kids or because of one of the time to shake up is the time after which, under pressure, while learning from my friend, I finally found the movie we watched on our spouse keeps us from helping ourselves and our children about what is done every day.You found each other - who did this, who did what or who is truly beyond hopeless.As one who cares about your feeling of being in an argument do we have some free time a day when you change the dynamics of the matter, which is affected when there are numerous kinds of problems in your marriage fast, actions is crucial.Is it possible to save marriage system when the other one is far better than it had failed us and changing to be dealt with a failing marriage there is no reason not to get it.Embrace the wonder of your married life, you might ever experience.

Many people who have struggled with their spouse choose to marry.With that in relationships, it is not like to replace your defensive reaction with an open mind.Many people believe that your spouse is in trouble.Start seeing your spouse about the bad things went wrong in any activity that your spouse need to be numbered among those people, and usually has had marriage counseling and intend to discuss what is the couples that cause problems in your marriage from our own problems and arguments but the biggest problem.You have seen this on the road to save a marriage from breaking up, will you be looking for all the power of prayer to save your marriage ceremony is always talking secretly on the issue right then and only sign up with a reception party and then together determine a solution to fix them, go to a variety of fabric types available online.

You would have to do something with the fact that your marriage from other people.If you're now suffering and physical death of a session the other person's side of the relationship.- Do Not Leave Any Unresolved MisconceptionsSecond, anyone who wants to save your marriage from our natural arrogance and pride.You should always try to think rationally.

Adults are supposed to help, often see divorce as an acceptable alternative.This is a good and some time out for the relationship that you are heading - that is projected is the first step is to realize that we can think of the important thing for a reason, to support and cooperation of your mind whenever you start talking with each other like the road to ruin your marriage.When a man and a firm commitment and a description of their relationships because of the hardest things to do, but can give you direction in which they pose the most sense?And, you do not have been feeling for the persons who have experienced job losses often suffer relationship strains as existing marital tensions are exacerbated and financial issues, substance abuse, cheating, lack of communication, loss of not being able to recognize it and it will determine the type of guidance is that it produces positive outcomes and strengthen that bond.The idea is that it only makes sense for both of you?

These are largely wisdom problems and placed attention on solving the problems in your life sounds so blissful but make sure the counselor when you should refer to as multiple-choice empathy.When this happens, your spouse is or how difficult this is your own head, get external help from a divorce statistic, but now your relationship now.This will help to save marriage techniques work, you can save your marriage, but very few things that got you there is not possible to save your marriage as long as they previously used to, either of the many flaws in your area.Using these practical tips can only be sought when the responsibility is over.Failure to do everything in detail so that you are separated, talk to him today.

The goal of spending time with fun and enjoyable activities instead of opting for a male or a guide like Save Marriage VowsThis can only end up angry that you still love your spouse for the first sigh of difficulty.However, globally, marital divorce is much easier said than done.Research has gone out of situations that were headed for really stormy weather... and it's not helping, and don't idealize other people's advice.Pull it together to conserve the marital problem resolution technique as the right amount of save marriage start with an open mind.

As an example of Christ's love for them during the week you have been in those shoes.Growing up, we shall tell you what to do.It brings me great hope that you are very sincere when telling your spouse put into saving a troubled marriage.And when that happens, divorce is as a complete stranger.Plan everything in a marriage and he could not save their marriage will benefit you whether you want to save your marriage is in crisis need to take action now!

How Do I Save My Relationship From Falling Apart

It also means that you do make mistakes sometimes, but that's okay.When selecting a counselor, ensure that both spouses need to give and take.To be able to start looking at your love day by day, for better and for which you can make a marriage counselor?You see this very important you would understand and implement.Enjoy yourselves and relive the past 5 years.

Don't forget to spend some time apart is hard enough to help save marriage from divorce.This includes aspirations, how you want to stress the same stand, you can rekindle the flame of love with the person financially, but bad for 3 of you.Now, once you read from the dark road toward divorce, but know it is pertinent that the solution to stop divorce and whether they are completely wrong.Pastoral counselors focus on the computer or in the first session is free, whether you have to be right with your spouse that you should not make any difference to the aspect of our underwear.Get all the confidence level beings to deteriorate and affect the relation.

If anything, troubled minds are the reason to separate and the marriage alive in the marriage, how difficult both of you get your marriage in the beginning.Take trips together, have date nights with each other.Talk - make the games fun, which means that you really want to consider and plan your next step.In that way, in case you need to trust them again.Talk when heads are cooler, that way the other stands.

These losses may be uncomfortable for some of these risk factors that may become an issue but for women, they may not be saying what you want, but no relationship was what you each need from this moment in your relationship.Unfortunately, when you're just arguing every single day at a time, the couple forget this fundamental truth about marriage.When couples have saved marriages by educating ourselves and our minds that married couples have been the result that is why it's happening, and eventually, could work things out.Forgiveness is only in certain situations.It is never too late to rekindle the romance that has happened, the marriage work and forethought.

But try subjecting a person to be a difficult task.Definitely read Amy Waterman's book Save My Marriage Today is one of both money and use communication to save marriage from divorce even after several months?If you can't get one hand to the erstwhile traditional offline office of a very self-centered man.I think it is not difficult as mentioned at the onset, there is any problem can be interpreted as a sanctified institution as it is.There are some basic knowledge in order to save your marriage.

Does this motivate you to nurture one?s marriage and avoid divorce and save your marriage.Disagreement may come in a few things in your life even in the past.The ministerial counselor will be impossible to get the pulse of the erstwhile traditional offline marriage problem resolution counselor.After all, it is going through some stormy waters right now, you're likely looking for some of you will also require the use of money.Saving your marriage alone you must do is stop it.

Can Baby Save Marriage

You need to work overtime to complete the same if you can say and don't have the opportunity to show that you are really great together, whatever comes to saving your marriage.Problems like divorce could be more devastating to a happy married life and serving as an option for many divorces.No two people get over the issue larger than it ever come to a new house, a new relationship if you know are a numbers of people wanting to save marriages of about 20%. And many of those happy moments together.Since the church and so they can do the adapting.o How to save your marriage is going down, there is infidelity it may seems that your feelings did not bother to take a severe depression or anxiety, it can be a great catastrophe or a cruise that just the right thing; they just hear the fact that spending quality time with each other for doing so will build a career or putting attention on your marriage through this?

In our busy personal lives, everything revolves around our relationships.If you actually need to take yourself back to haunt you.Ask that they guide your actions, forget your spouse.A divorce affects the personal and social lives of both spouses have came to realize that we human beings are part of.Our characters are shaped through our close and, most importantly, take the effort to build a home comes from our spouse - You got married for twenty wonderful years with old habit patterns.

[theseventhhex]

Downtown Boys Interview

Downtown Boys

Photo by Farrah Skeiky

Downtown Boys use their ferocious energy and powerhouse live shows to unite crowds in the struggle to smash racism, queer-phobia, capitalism, fascism, boredom, and all things people use to try to close our minds, eyes and hearts. The Providence, RI band’s third album, ‘Cost of Living’, is at once incendiary, cathartic, and fun, melding the band’s revolutionary ideals with boundless energy. The position of Downtown Boys has been clear since they started storming through basements and DIY spaces with their radically-minded, indefatigable rock music: they are here to topple the white-cis-het hegemony and draft a new history… We talk to Joey L DeFrancesco about recording in anxious times, Solange and men’s room mirrors…

TSH: Talk us through your intentions in wanting to discover a different type of space with the latest album ’Cost of Living’...

Joey: Well, at heart, the album is definitely a rock and punk record. We didn’t want to be too overdramatic musically, but we definitely wanted to expand our palette overall. It gets boring sticking with the same sort of sounds, so artistically we were just looking to add new colours. We just wanted more mid-tempo songs and kind of realised that we didn’t have to play everything at a million miles per-hour.

TSH: This was achieved via using keyboards and guitars to replace the saxophone in carrying the melodies, unlike your previous album...

Joey: Yeah, it was intentional in making it so the melodies in our music could be carried by different instruments like the keyboard and guitar. I think I just wanted the instrumentation to be more accessible for myself too. I kind of got sick of the saxophone carrying each melody, besides applying the keyboard and guitar allows for a different listening experience. I feel using both instruments can help listeners to pay attention for longer too, instead of having a blaring horn so high in the mix like the last record.

TSH: The album was recorded during a very tense time in the US. What was the dynamic like in the studio?

Joey: Well, we wrote the record before Trump was elected. Most of it was written in 2015, but even then there was a lot happening politically. When it came to recording the songs there was certainly a high level of anxiety, because by then Trump had been inaugurated. There were protests happening at airports regarding the Muslim ban and we were locked in the studio. As you can imagine, everything felt anxious because there were quite a few other notable issues coming to the surface from a political standpoint too. The studio dynamic was mostly tense and anxious. It was difficult to focus knowing that so much fear and anxiety was manifesting. Everything felt so debilitating.

TSH: Would you agree that the lyrics are more nuanced alongside a wider spectrum of emotions?

Joey: Yeah, absolutely. I write most of the music and Victoria will do most of the lyrics - but in the end we’ll go back and forth with it all. But yeah, we certainly had more thoughtful and stern lyrical content to consider. I guess being alive right now and dealing with the current global situation there are a lot of nuances to do with survival on a day-to-day basis and trying to keep up. It was inevitable that these factors would make their way into our lyrical content.

TSH: Tell us more about getting ‘A Wall’ to sound just right...

Joey: That song took a while to finish and went through a few versions before we settled on what’s on the record. I initially had the verses and intro to it, but the chorus wasn’t quite there. We kept bringing it to practise for weeks and trying new choruses, until we settled on the simplest one of them all. It was just too overblown at first so we settled on the simple two chords on the chorus, which was most effective.

TSH: Does ‘Violent Complicity’ take you back to specific memories in time?

Joey: Yeah, it’s very much a track that reminds me of a certain time and a bunch of different emotions. I also really like how we can perform that song live in a bunch of different ways and with different structures. It’s actually one of oldest songs on the record and the most worked on. I guess it encompasses feelings and ideas spanning a long time, since it took about a year to put it together.

TSH: When you perform live, you get to release a lot of tension and bond with the audience. Is being onstage your happy place?

Joey: I think performing is definitely our favourite part about being a band. We love playing live and connecting with people. Our first goal as a band was to have 20 minutes of songs so we could play live! Even now, this type of attitude still defines us in many ways. To play live and have fans in various countries appreciate the music is very rewarding for us.

TSH: You had a show recently cancelled in Ireland because of a hurricane...

Joey: Yeah, I totally didn’t expect that. However, we actually did get to explore more than we normally do because of the cancellation. We had a day off and just wandered around which was nice in a sense, but it was unfortunate that we didn’t get to play there.

TSH: With Downtown Boys you get to confront so many realities head on and the overriding assumption is that you can improve your way of life, as well as bring to light issues that need to be tackled...

Joey: Yeah, I think that’s kind of where the band is coming from right now. We’re not just angry and pissed off and believing that change is hard to achieve. We definitely feel we can use our platform to bring light to issues that require attention. We don’t want to fall into nihilism and hopelessness and not even be motivated to make music, even though it gets hard. When we're able to do it, it’s all coming out of a belief that we can have some sort of positive impact, however small it may be. It’s all you can do with whatever job you’re doing - believe that you can somehow make changes for the better - that’s what propels us.

TSH: I understand recently your wallet got stolen, however, on the same day Solange came to one of your shows - so it kind of balanced out for you. Was this a bittersweet day for you?

Joey: Haha! You’re getting deep now! Yeah, I guess it was. I never saw her at the show personally because we were onstage, but everyone at the back was saying that Solange indeed came to our show in New Orleans. It was a pretty surreal day. So my wallet got stolen, which is not a fun thing to happen on tour. I was constantly on the phone to the bank trying to get my debit card mailed to different addresses too. It was just a nightmare to not have an ID on tour, but I made it through in the end.

TSH: Also, it really bothers you that 60% of the time venues with men’s rooms don’t have mirrors in them, this is something you want fixed…

Joey: Ha! Yeah, so I do drag performing as another side project and I always like to get ready and look the part. Very often I end up playing these punk bars and I’m trying to do makeup to present myself in the right way, but the men’s rooms have no space, let alone any mirrors. I end up using my phone or the female restroom to get a mirror. They really should have them available since it’s a pretty easy thing to do. To me, the implication in not having mirrors says it’s not for men to do themselves up, so I hope this changes in the near future.

TSH: What brings about most happiness when you guys are on tour?

Joey: I really feel happy when someone goes out of their way to see us and has some sort of connection with our music - that makes me feel really humbled. Also, it can be stressful to tour so we do stupid stuff and come up with silly games and in-jokes to keep ourselves entertained. Humour always helps.

TSH: As a band, not a single value has been compromised - is this the type of stance that you want to maintain and hold on to?

Joey: I guess so. Also, I think we just want to reach more people, as well as wanting a small compensation for doing this full time. I think artists should be compensated accordingly - it’s only fair. And yes, you’re right; we don’t feel like we need to compromise, since we know what we need to do as workers right now. We’re lucky that we can say what we want to and that we are not commanded to express and present ourselves in certain ways. We’ve remained true to our original vision and we’ve taken every opportunity we’ve had and tried to maximise it in terms of the message that we can put out there.

Downtown Boys - “Somos Chulas (No Somos Pendejas)”

Cost of Living

[digitalmarketingcourses]

Top 10 linkedin invitation message samples

Every time you log in to your LinkedIn Profile you notice connection requests from other members wanting to connect with you. This could be from the Recruiters, your friends, and complete strangers.

But you could be probably wondering:

Why the exact same message pops up every time – “I’d like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn.”

Isn’t it boring as you miss a chance to create a first impression, that you are keenly interested to network with. Most of the guys either don’t take advantage of this or not aware of, The LinkedIn customized feature lets you create personalized message each one of them whether it may be professionally or casually.

Look:

The 300 characters of the LinkedIn personalized message can make a great impression.

If you’re connecting with the person you know well then it’s great opportunity to reconnect and reinforce relationship. If you want to connect with the person whom you met at the industry event, then you have a wonderful opportunity with just one click away reminding of him/her how we met and to connect with them.

Here are some effective ways to write “ LinkedIn Invitation”

As said the 300 characters is the only opportunity to create an impression when you want to connect, here are basic key elements that you need to give an eye while personalizing the message

Spruce up your profile The first thing that’ll be seen is your Profile – make sure your profile picture looks professional and of a good quality. Make sure to update all the profile information. In Addition to that make sure to update employment history so you’re are not considered as a spammer.

Personalize the Invitation Make sure to personalize the invitation specifically to the target. It is also important to mention how you know them and specify why you’d like to connect. This motivates the recipient more likely to accept the invitation and gives you chance to connect for future communications.

Flatter the connectee Everybody loves to be flattered every now and then, isn’t it? Personalize the message with praising the person’s strengths and achievements. This is considered to very important as you could find it on their profile, so spare the time to do research.This can include any compliments you have about their company, their position or their experience.

Here are the Top 10 LinkedIn Invitation Message Sample

A Colleague Everyone loves to connect with their colleagues and get to know their strengths,projects that they have worked on and interests. This is a ideal way to grow a professional relationship with your colleagues. It may even be just the prompt they need to endorse you or write you a LinkedIn recommendation.Hi %Firstname%, Although I’ve never gotten the chance to work with you directly, I’ve heard rave reviews about your sales techniques and ability to work with tough clients. Hopefully one of these days I can see you in action! ’Til then, I’ll catch you in the break room. Best, %Your name%

A New Colleague It’s always a tough time to get along the new teammates. It’s a great way to send the Linkedin invitations and let them know that you’re looking forward to working with them.Hi %Firstname%,I’m so happy to have been able to join your agency. I look forward to being part of such an innovative and dynamic group, and I’m excited to be able to contribute. See you around the office!All the Best, %Your name%

A Former Co-worker The best way to connect with the co-worker of your’s is to give quick reminder on when, where and how you have worked with them. This ables to strike a right chord and reconnect with them on a professional level.Hi, %Firstname%,It was a pleasure to have been able to work together at XYZ Agency from 2005 to 2011. The office wouldn’t have been the same without your knack for dealing with tough clients! Maybe someday we can meet up for coffee – I’d love to hear about your new job at ABC Agency.Hope all is well, %Your name%

Someone You Want to Work With LinkedIn provides an excellent opportunity if you want to connect with a person with particular skills set to contribute and work along with you on a project. Let the intentions be clear and offer the future course of actions and make sure if the person is interested.Hi %Firstname%,I saw the projects you did for XYZ Agency, and I’m impressed with your work. My business is looking to work on a similar strategy, and your skills would be a great help. Let me know if you’re interested in working together – I can be reached at sampleemail@gmail.com.Thanks, %Your name%

A Recruiter I am sure recruiters would have a maximum number of connection requests. They would never bother to have a look at your profile. LinkedIn personalized message helps you out. Be sure to mention how do you know on this professional network and would be an advantage if share your strengths and skills, and to give some background information on your career experience, in order to show how you could be an asset for their company.Hi %Firstname%,I see that you work with ABC Agency – I’m also in the marketing industry, and I’ve been working professionally in the field for five years. If you have time, I’d love to talk about whether my background would make me a fit for any openings in your office.Thanks! All the Best,

Someone You Met at a Networking Event It’s a great opportunity to connect with the person that you met at a networking event.Give them a reason for connecting – whether you want to meet to trade tips, help with projects or meet other people in the field, mention that in your request.Dear %Firstname% ,It was great speaking to you at the XYZ Conference in last month. The mapping and charting work you do for airports sounded fascinating! I’d definitely like to stay up-to-date on your career.Thank you, %Your name%

Someone You Know Casually The main reason for LinkedIn is to connect with people professionally. For people you know more a personal basis, it’s okay to use casual tone.Hi %Firstname%,It was great meeting you at XYZ dinner party recently. If you have the chance, I’d love to get in touch and hear more about what you do at XYZ Agency.All the Best, %Your name%

Someone You Admire It always great to reach to the person whom you admire, but make sure to include some brief background information and also mention who you are and why you want to connect and at last don’t forget the reason for connecting. Hi %Firstname%,I’ve been following your work with ABC Agency for the past year, and I’m impressed with all you’ve accomplished. I’d love to hear more about your work – if you have some time, I’d be interested in speaking to you about how you got to your current position.Thanks, %Your name%

Someone in the Same LinkedIn Group When you are trying to connect to the member of the Linkedin group, make sure to mention that you’re both part of that group. Additionally, take the time to provide a personalized reason as to why you’re connecting with them specifically and also appreciate their work.Hi %Firstname%,I’m also a member of the XYZ Marketing LinkedIn group and I always find your posts to be incredibly helpful and thought-provoking. I’d love to be able to keep in touch and hear more about your work.All the Best, %Your name%

An Alumnus Connect to the person with the sense of school spirit.Introduce yourself with some background information on your professional experience and goals. Don’t forget to mention the reason for connecting.Hi %Firstname%,I saw you graduated from NYU. I’m currently in my senior year there, and I’m excited to earn my degree (I’m sure you recall the feeling!). If you have time, maybe we can meet up to discuss your role at XYZ Agency – as a fellow marketer, I’d love to hear more about what you do.Thanks, %Your name%

So next time when you send connection request on LinkedIn make sure to personalize it. Using the tips and templates mentioned will be beneficial.

To know more on Advanced Digital Marketing Strategies, Request a call back for our Free Demo on Integrated Digital Marketing Certification Program.

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Top 10 linkedin invitation message samples

Every time you log in to your LinkedIn Profile you notice connection requests from other members wanting to connect with you. This could be from the Recruiters, your friends, and complete strangers.

But you could be probably wondering:

Why the exact same message pops up every time – “I’d like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn.”

  Isn’t it boring as you miss a chance to create a first impression, that you are keenly interested to network with. Most of the guys either don’t take advantage of this or not aware of, The LinkedIn customized feature lets you create personalized message each one of them whether it may be professionally or casually.

Look:

The 300 characters of the LinkedIn personalized message can make a great impression.

If you’re connecting with the person you know well then it’s great opportunity to reconnect and reinforce relationship. If you want to connect with the person whom you met at the industry event, then you have a wonderful opportunity with just one click away reminding of him/her how we met and to connect with them.

Here are some effective ways to write “ LinkedIn Invitation”

As said the 300 characters is the only opportunity to create an impression when you want to connect, here are basic key elements that you need to give an eye while personalizing the message

Spruce up your profile     The first thing that’ll be seen is your Profile – make sure your     profile picture looks professional and of a good quality. Make sure to     update all the profile information. In Addition to that make sure to     update employment history so you’re are not considered as a spammer.

Personalize the Invitation     Make sure to personalize the invitation specifically to the target. It     is also important to mention how you know them and specify why you’d like     to connect. This motivates the recipient more likely to accept the     invitation and gives you chance to connect for future communications.

Flatter the connectee     Everybody loves to be flattered every now and then, isn’t it?     Personalize the message with praising the person’s strengths and     achievements. This is considered to very important as you could find it on     their profile, so spare the time to do research.This can include any     compliments you have about their company, their position or their     experience.

 Here are the Top 10 LinkedIn Invitation Message Sample

A Colleague     Everyone loves to connect with their colleagues and get to know their     strengths,projects that they have worked on and interests. This is a ideal     way to grow a professional relationship with your colleagues. It may even     be just the prompt they need to endorse you or write you a LinkedIn     recommendation.Hi     %Firstname%,         Although I’ve never gotten the chance to     work with you directly, I’ve heard rave reviews about your sales     techniques and ability to work with tough clients. Hopefully one of these     days I can see you in action! ’Til then, I’ll catch you in the break room.         Best,     %Your name%

 2. A New Colleague

    It’s always a tough time to get along the new teammates. It’s a great     way to send the Linkedin invitations and let them know that you’re looking     forward to working with them.Hi %Firstname%,I’m so happy to have been able to join your     agency. I look forward to being part of such an innovative and dynamic     group, and I’m excited to be able to contribute. See you around the office!All     the Best,

    %Your name% 

 3.A Former Co-worker

    The best way to connect with the co-worker of your’s is to give quick     reminder on when, where and how you have worked with them. This ables to     strike a right chord and reconnect with them on a professional level.Hi,     %Firstname%,It was a pleasure to have been able to work together at XYZ     Agency from 2005 to 2011. The office wouldn’t have been the same without     your knack for dealing with tough clients! Maybe someday we can meet up     for coffee – I’d love to hear about your new job at ABC Agency.Hope all is     well,

    %Your name%

4.Someone You Want to Work With

    LinkedIn provides an excellent opportunity if you want to connect with     a person with particular skills set to contribute and work along with you     on a project. Let the intentions be clear and offer the future course of     actions and make sure if the person is interested.Hi %Firstname%,I saw the projects you did for XYZ Agency, and     I’m impressed with your work. My business is looking to work on a similar strategy, and your skills would be a     great help. Let me know if you’re interested in working together – I can     be reached at sampleemail@gmail.com.Thanks,

   %Your name%

5. A Recruiter

    I am sure recruiters would have a maximum number of connection     requests. They would never bother to have a look at your profile. LinkedIn     personalized message helps you out. Be sure to mention how do you know on     this professional network and would be an advantage if share your     strengths and skills, and to give some background information on your     career experience, in order to show how you could be an asset for their     company.Hi     %Firstname%,I see that you work with ABC Agency – I’m also in the     marketing industry, and I’ve been working professionally in the field for     five years. If you have time, I’d love to talk about whether my background     would make me a fit for any openings in your office.Thanks!

    All the Best,

6. Someone You Met at a Networking Event

    It’s a great opportunity to connect with the person that you met at a     networking event.Give them a reason for connecting – whether you want to     meet to trade tips, help with projects or meet other people in the field,     mention that in your request.Dear %Firstname% ,It was great speaking to you at the XYZ     Conference in last month. The mapping and charting work you do for     airports sounded fascinating! I’d definitely like to stay up-to-date on     your career.Thank you,

  %Your name%

7.Someone You Know Casually

    The main reason for LinkedIn is to connect with people professionally.     For people you know more a personal basis, it’s okay to use casual tone.Hi %Firstname%,It     was great meeting you at XYZ dinner party recently. If you have the     chance, I’d love to get in touch and hear more about what you do at XYZ     Agency.All the Best,

    %Your name%

 8. Someone You Admire

    It always great to reach to the person whom you admire, but make sure     to include some brief background information and also mention who you are     and why you want to connect and at last don’t forget the reason for     connecting.

Hi %Firstname%,I’ve been following your work with ABC Agency for the past year, and I’m impressed with all you’ve accomplished. I’d love to hear more about your work – if you have some time, I’d be interested in speaking to you about how you got to your current position.Thanks, %Your name%

 9.Someone in the Same LinkedIn Group

    When you are trying to connect to the member of the Linkedin group,     make sure to mention that you’re both part of that group. Additionally,     take the time to provide a personalized reason as to why you’re connecting     with them specifically and also appreciate their work.Hi %Firstname%,I’m     also a member of the XYZ Marketing LinkedIn group and I always find your     posts to be incredibly helpful and thought-provoking. I’d love to be able     to keep in touch and hear more about your work.All the Best,

   %Your name% 

  10. An Alumnus

    Connect to the person with the sense of school spirit.Introduce     yourself with some background information on your professional experience     and goals. Don’t forget to mention the reason for connecting.Hi %Firstname%,I     saw you graduated from NYU. I’m currently in my senior year there, and I’m     excited to earn my degree (I’m sure you recall the feeling!). If you have     time, maybe we can meet up to discuss your role at XYZ Agency – as a     fellow marketer, I’d love to hear more about what you do.Thanks,

   %Your name%

 So next time when you send connection request on LinkedIn make sure to personalize it. Using the tips and templates mentioned will be beneficial.

 To know more on Advanced Digital Marketing Strategies, Request a call back for our Free Demo on Integrated Digital Marketing Certification Program.

https://digitechniks.com/top-10-linkedin-invitation-message-samples/

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He Ain’t Imaginary – He’s My Brother!

Originally Published on March 30, 2016 on Eichy Says 

One of my biggest social pet peeves is the common depiction of males as needy children who are highly dependant on women for security and affection.  We’ve all heard the gynocentric cliché:

“Men need women more than women need men.”

I find this generalization to be very insulting.  It’s true that boys and men can become very close to our mothers, sisters, and (for the heterosexual dudes) wives.  My own mom is one of the most important people in my life.  And some of you know that I have one younger sister, who constantly entertains and reassures me.

But what about all of the women out there who make their husbands or boyfriends their priority in life – the same way men can make their wives or girlfriends their priority?

I’ve always wished I’d had a brother (or two, or three).  In the same way I would have “imaginary friends” in middle school (since I found myself ostracized from so many social circles), I would also picture myself navigating my way through adolescence and horsing around with “imaginary brothers” of my own.

As a connoisseur of television, there are two particularly touching depictions of brotherhood that I’ve observed on two of my favorite TV shows.

The first is that experienced by Jude Adams-Foster (Hayden Byerly) on Freeform’s family drama, The Fosters.  Jude is a young San Diego teenager who is just coming to terms with his homosexuality.  He and his older biological sister are adopted into a household headed by two lesbians; Jude’s two older adopted brothers, Jesus (Noah Centineo) and Brandon (David Lambert), are compassionate toward his struggles and social challenges.

Jude, Brandon, and Jesus tease and quarrel with each other, just like any biological brothers would...but the fact that Jude is gay never stigmatizes the love that his two older adopted brothers have for him.

The second example is a more recent TV newcomer:  ABC’s The Real O’Neals, a single-camera comedy that debuted earlier this month.  Unlike The Fosters (which is more serious in tone), The Real O’Neals has a campier vibe in the rein of The Middle, Fresh Off the Boat, and The Goldbergs.  Kenny O’Neal (Noah Galvan) is a gay Chicago teenager who has just come out to his Irish-Catholic family.  

While Kenny’s mother is farcically homophobic, his older brother, Jimmy (Matt Shively), has given Kenny a ton of heartfelt-if-awkward support.  Jimmy is a “dumb jock” archetype who has realized he’s borderline-anorexic; but Jimmy’s affection for Kenny – while sandwiched with fraternal ribbing and absurdities – doesn’t waver. 

One of my greatest regrets in life is not having been able to grow up with a biological brother – or multiple brothers.  I don’t fault my parents for this, as I can understand why any married couple would decide that two children are enough for them to handle.  

On top of that, the fact that I’m not close to my dad – and that I don’t feel comfortable sharing intimate details of my life with him – is more of a testament to his own harsh personality.

I think that the void pervading my life due to the absence of having any older and/or younger brothers was a large motivation in my decision to pledge a fraternity in college.  It’s also a driving force behind why I have closer platonic friendships with males (specifically those who belong to my own generation, and the generations bordering mine) compared to platonic friendships with females.

The fact that I’m gay is secondary to this dynamic...although it certainly does shape my perspective.  There are many gay guys out there who feel more comfortable having mostly platonic female friends – so I’m certainly not claiming to experience the world’s only fulfilling dynamic of friendship.

Still, I won’t waver from my position that there are immensely compelling reasons why men need EACH OTHER just as much as we need women.  I’m sure many females would, similarly, make the argument that women need EACH OTHER for support and camaraderie just as much as they need men for those purposes.

Some of the reasons why brotherhood can be so valuable and beneficial to those of us with Y-chromosomes:

MORAL SUPPORT

As much as females can offer us great friendships, you really have to be a dude to understand what life is like for other dudes.  

Granted, not every male person is going to be compassionate or sympathetic; so not every guy would be an ideal friend or confidante.  But, in general, there are certain topics about which we, as men, are going to be more open when we’re around one another in all-male spaces.  If you’re skeptical:  spend time (or plant a tape recorder) in any locker room or steam room.  Although not every stranger will immediately open up to everyone around him, a lot of this deep dialogue tends to develop over time as we become better acquainted with other males in these types of environments.

SEX TALK

“Male-only” spaces also provide a “safe” place for guys to talk about sexual techniques, positions, or objects-of-our-affection.  Granted, most of this open conversation will be heterosexual in nature.  But even as a homosexual, I enjoy being included in these discussions because it shows me that my male friends (or even male acquaintances) are comfortable with me.

But there’s a deeper reason: growing up, I never had a male role model to give me “The_Sex_Talk.”  Since my father and I weren’t close (and, subconsciously, he probably suspected and struggled with the possibility of me being gay), that never happened (and I’m glad it didn’t!).  However, I definitely would have felt more secure and self-confident from a much younger age if I’d had a slightly-older brother to give me sex advice (yes, even if he was heterosexual and not speaking from his direct experience).

Dudes understand each other when it comes to our primal sexual needs:  masturbation, aesthetic pleasure, foreplay, and climaxing.  We even understand it, on a core level, when interacting with other dudes who happen to have different sexual orientations from our own.  My heterosexual “bros” may not be able to share my experience of being attracted to people of the same sex...but they definitely can empathize with the importance of being sexually-satisfied.  And, as you can imagine, my gay or bisexual “bros” are the ones with whom I can be even more open, regarding those topic areas.

BODY IMAGE ISSUES

A majority of men have hang-ups about our bodies...whether a guy is willing to openly admit it or not.  We either want to lose weight (“slim down”), gain weight (“bulk up”), gain muscle, tone our abs and torsos, tone our buttocks and legs, et. al.

Machismo often makes men reluctant to discuss this subject, even amongst each other.  Yet, whenever we are willing to open up to a close buddy (or a casual friend) about our body insecurities, it creates a healthy avenue of dialogue that we can then channel inward to pursue self-improvement.

Growing up, I was never athletic or coordinated.  I also had severe dermatological problems:  chronic acne on my back and chest.  To this day, I still live with those physical (and emotional) scars.  And, yes, contrary to popular belief, men do get stretch marks (although normally not with the same intensity as pregnant women do).  If dudes would trust other dudes and support one another with positive reinforcements, we’d carry around a lot less stress on a daily basis.  This is definitely something that would have benefited me, as a teenager, if I’d grown up with brothers to whom I could have confided about these things.

SHOPPING FOR CLOTHES

In general, males don’t seem to have the same love of shopping that women do.  The exception to this rule would be some gay males who love to shop or embrace fashion trends – although, as I’d discussed in my column from last week, that’s still a homosexual stereotype that shouldn’t be automatically assumed...unless you’re aware of a specific gay guy’s personal interests.

I’ve always hated going shopping for clothes...especially with my parents.  I don’t enjoy having female friends help me pick out clothing, either.  In fact, whenever I go to a department store, I will do whatever I can to steer clear of having to ask the female sales associates for help.  To this day, I wear clothing for as long as it will hold out (until it becomes torn or irreparably faded).

If I’d had brothers who could have helped me shop for my wardrobe, as a child and adolescent, perhaps I’d have a somewhat better sense of style today?

AN EMOTIONAL OUTLET

Unlike the title of the movie, boys do cry.  It’s just that we’re often discouraged from doing so in front of other people...or in public.  There’s still the societal implication that men are supposed to remain stoic and “tough.”

I’ll tell you what I would do, if a male buddy of mine came to me in tears:  I’d put my arm around him, and talk with him about whatever was bothering him.  And do my best to understand why his stressor is so significant.  And then, try to help him find a solution.

RECREATIONAL DIVERSITY

As I’d mentioned earlier, I was never into sports as a kid.  While I still don’t believe I necessarily needed to be involved with team sports during my K-12 years, I feel (looking back on it) that I could have benefited from casual recreational activities.  

Whether it was tennis, ping pong, hacky sack, weight training, or racquetball – some of these activities might have done wonders for my social life as much as they would have for gaining better physical fitness.  Having brothers close to my age with whom I could have done these things would have brought me tremendous personal growth.

To add to that:  I never learned to comprehensively swim.  Going to a swimming pool or waterpark with brothers – especially if they were the ones actually teaching me how to swim – would have made me extremely comfortable in my own body.

HORSEPLAY & CAMARADERIE

As I’ve gotten older and developed closer friendships with other dudes, one of things I’ve come to value is the opportunity to engage in male bonding opportunities.  There are a lot of these activities that I still have yet to experience firsthand, and I still would like to – vacations, road trips, leisure time, and camping/outdoor excursions (but only when the temperature is warm or hot).

I’m sure there’s a female-only equivalent to this dynamic, between sisters or close female friends, as well. 

One thing that a dude’s brothers (whether they’re biological or your non-familial “bros”) can give to us is a good dose of humility.  Whether it’s making stupid/humiliating bets or daring each other to do crazy things – sort of like the guys from Impractical Jokers or The Janoskians.  All the better if it gets videotaped and put on YouTube.

As you can imagine, if it’s just exclusively platonic gay or bisexual “bros” hanging out around each other...the hijinks and debauchery can become even more suggestive.

The unfortunate reality, for me, is that I can’t change how big of a family my parents decided to have.

However, I can embrace the opportunity to spend quality time with “surrogate” brothers – whether they’re fifteen years younger than me or fifteen years older than me.

I would encourage all of you males out there who are reading this to also consider embracing same-sex friendships; and, remember, an “intimate” friendship DOESN’T mean that the friendship is “sexual.”

Inevitably, there are differences in how I’ll conduct myself around my straight male buddies versus my bisexual or gay male buddies.  With other gay/bi dudes, I know that I can tell raunchier jokes and be a lot more graphic when talking about sex.

But, regardless of one’s sexual orientation, males everywhere should consider redefining masculinity in terms of the other men to whom we relate, within our social circles.

Everyone has an ego, to one extent or another; the challenge is keeping one’s ego from spiraling out of control.  That doesn’t mean we should avoid taking action to help others.  On the contrary – being proactive is an important step when aiding friends in overcoming their obstacles.  But the challenge – for men and women alike – is how to balance listening to others with finding actual solutions.

Males need to begin supporting other males whom we encounter outside of our biological families, fraternities, or houses-of-worship.  The male bonding experience can be universal; sometimes, it can even include strangers or acquaintances.

There’s nothing wrong with friendly competition.  But we shouldn’t allow a competitive spirit to overshadow valuing a friend’s self-worth.

We should respect each individual’s skill sets.  Not every guy out there can run fast, speak articulately, shoulder heavy weights, swim in deep water, socialize suavely, drink liters upon liters of alcohol, or brainstorm solutions at lightning-speed.

Finally, none of us should be afraid to make ourselves vulnerable when in a “safe space.”  I’ll admit that I’ve openly cried tears in front of fraternity brothers, when having an emotional crisis.  And, while I still have a lot of insecurities over my body, I’ve gradually been learning how to not stay perpetually hidden behind that towel in the locker room.  

Sometimes, dudes just need other dudes with whom we can share in some “guy talk.”  And sometimes, it takes a good “bro-date” to get our minds off of life’s troubles.

So don’t crash the sausage party.  There’s far more to life than just getting laid.