#my first mm comic btw

[xiv-wolfram]

Wolfram's Character Inspiration Chart

This took me a while because I've answered variations of this one before but forgot who I said. Honestly I consume a lot of media so… Wolf is basically 80% me with character traits thrown in from shows I like. I'm focusing more on personality/aesthetic/narrative than physical inspiration here... Ok maybe if Ravi and Eliot had a kid with Geralt's muscles and green eyes from somewhere?

Xena - Xena: Warrior Princess A person with a dark past seeks redemption by traveling around and doing good deeds. Wears lots of leather. Their primary weapon is a sword. Consistently flirting with their best friend. After writing the synopsis of his character story I realized Wolf is basically Xena… ok he looks more like Ares. Whatever, it's my bi-awakening show I can do what I want! After realizing this, I had to give Wolf some chakram lore too for the comparison to be complete! (which was easy with the Thavnairian dad)

Geralt - The Witcher Excellent fashion sense plus Wolf is also a person who tries to be neutral but will do anything to protect their loved ones. Mostly, Geralt is on here for his fighting style. Wolf uses more magic but he also has a very active/fluid way of combat. This is due to his dancer training and why he's so evasive, but I imagine it looks similar to how Geralt fights in the Blaviken scene from the first episode of season 1, just with the occasional VerFlare.

Ravi Chakrabarti - iZombie Did ya'll know Wolf is a bit of a nerd? I try and show it sometimes but due to the subject matter of many of the comics, it may not be obvious. He's really smart. Figures things out before others (like how did other people not realize Liv is a zombie?!) Unlike Ravi, he didn't have a formal education. He only knows the common language but reads a lot and even asks Y'Shtola to translate tomes for him. When he's around friends he's extremely talkative, usually about his interests (Mhachi history, cuisine, non-traditional uses for magic, etc). Also, Ravi's relationship with Peyton is (usually) really great power couple stuff. Plus they're good friends who joke around but are very sweet and flirty with each other. (Rahul Kohli is also Wolfram's voice claim btw!)

M.M. (Marvin Milk) - The Boys For some reason, I'm the only person I know who watches The Boys?! Anyway MM is great. He's got stuff from his past that really weighs on him but he fights through it for his friends and family. He's usually kind of the moral center of The Boys with a strong sense of right and wrong even if it doesn't align with those around him. He's also the paternal/fraternal figure trying to look out for everyone.

Jessica Jones - Jessica Jones She's got kind of a dark and snarky sense of humor. Leather. Alcoholic with PTSD but she doesn't let it stop her from doing what needs to be done and being a hero. Honestly I just really love characters who save people while not really knowing how to save themselves but hanging on anyway. Wolf's also got a pretty strong vigilante side…

Eliot Waugh - The Magicians Absolutely the most relatable depiction of depression I've seen on TV. He's usually really friendly and charismatic. Always joking around. It's all a mask for his major chronic depression. Drinks a lot. Also, very smart and talented mage without having to put in as much effort as Alice (read the books) which can be a double-edged sword. His biggest enemy is himself.

tagged by: @talion-graves (Thanks! This was funnnnn!!!)

tagging: This part always makes me nervous I'll forget someone. So just - anyone else who wants to do it - I wanna see it! The original template is here! I just tweaked it a bit for me.

[lievaiya]

[antasmas]

I should really post my MM merch collection one day

[doctorofmagic]

Strange #1 review

Clea should be on the next Savage Avengers book because boi, she invented the concept of SAVAGE

Btw I’ll add a few TWs because... yeah, that happened in a Strange comic. I’m still shocked.

[TW: Blood; Gore]

I’ll get into personalities later but first let’s see what’s happening.

The chapter starts with Clea facing the Harvestman as seen in the previews/sneak peek. And when she says she is far more brutal, she’s not exaggerating.

The Harvestman forbids Clea to resurrect Stephen and the chapter changes to earlier that morning with the preview featuring Doom. Things, mm, escalated more than I could have predicted haha

So we learn afterwards that Clea is actually lying here. It’s not like Stephen gave the mantle to Clea to make sure that Victor doesn’t become SS (which, imo, it’s not so odd to consider here because yeah, we all know that Victor would be... shady as a Sorcerer Supreme, to say the least). But he also has a point, the Tournament didn’t happen. And then again, Clea has an even better point because true, Victor was not around when Stephen died (chronologically  speaking, he was definitely in space “fighting” Dormammu with the Guardians of the Galaxy). Also, true. Stephen did fight for the Vishanti for five thousand years, and that’s another brilliant reference Jed brings here, showing that he truly knows the character’s background (which I deeply appreciate).

From Doctor Strange - Sorcerer Supreme #80.

But for real, she touched a nerve there. She really hurt his feelings, and so he leaves in utter defeat lmao. I’m shocked with her savagery and sassiness, like, Clea, my love???? Even Aleister and Anton join her, I cant.

So Wong also shows up and gods, he spent all night drinking at the Bar With No Doors mourning Stephen. I’m just SO NOT OKAY. Friendly reminder that losing Stephen was one of Wong’s most dreaded fears, as established back in v4. Imagine his pain and grief ahahahaha :’)

Clea doesn’t accept Wong’s terrible state and so she convinces him to go for some *real* coffee. Wong says there’s a Goblin Market nearby and off they go. Clea also reveals that she is determined to bring Stephen back. This dialogue happens and I’m laughing and crying at the same time haha :’)

And so Wong takes Clea to the Shrouded Bazaar.

They talk about the wonders of the market and the fact that no one rules the place, it’s a community’s safe space even though some bad people tried to take it by force. The shop owner mentions two known names: Kingpin and the Hood both made their attempts to control the market but failed. The same goes for the Blasmephy Cartel, which infiltrate the market while the owner talks about them.

They start shooting and thigs get... graphic. Clea is really pissed.

Wong is me.

I am speechless. She... She went full Evil!Stephen and bounded a demon through the Eye of Agamotto. And this is just the first chapter!! CLEA, MY QUEEN?????

Aaaaaaand she transmuted the last survivor into butterflies, just like Stephen in IW!!!

Talk about using beauty to be mortal oooooooof, my queen???

Next, they’re back to the Sanctum and Bats’ smile is the most important thing to me rn, do not touch me.

Wong is truly priceless here. That’s what I’ve talking about all this time xD every hero dies at some point haha

Clea casts a spell to detect necromantic energy in hope that Stephen manages to return from the dead by himself as many others did.

And finally, they have THE talk. You know, about murder?

But before they could continue, Clea’s spell activates, which means necromantic energy was detected. Clea hurries to the place while Wong is... Poor Wong... I want to hug him so so so bad.

While Clea is heading towards the source, she reflects upon the events that brought her here.

So this is what I was talking about when I said Clea was lying to Victor. Indeed, she really cheated in order to get the mantle without a new contest, and I’m kinda concerned about it because entities are... complicated. But I’m also glad because, although a bit extreme, Clea is resorting to the same thing that matters the most to Stephen: love. She’s using her Faltine heritage, the desire to conquer, in a good way. And I’m not saying she’s been altruistic about it. She’s not. It’s quite petty but this is not a bad thing imo. Because I don't want Clea to be like Stephen. I love their differences. I adore the fact that Stephen uses love as a guideline to do good while Clea sees love as a powerful weapon. Same strong feeling, different perspectives.

I’m not so sure how she used her desire to conquer love in order to convince the Vishanti that she should be the next Sorcerer Supreme but... We’ll have to wait and see.

PS: mmm, maybe Victor would understand the concept of love if you mentioned his mommy, Clea xD that’s his weak spot for sure haha.

PS²: this is literally how I describe Stephen pleaaaaase.

And lastly! We return to the beginning of the chapter, where we’re introduced to the Harvestman and...

Thunderstrike is a character related to Thor and even had a team-up with Stephen.

He was supposed to be dead so it’s understandable that the Harvestman is using necromancy to fight her. But judging by the first page, I think Clea finished him (you can see a hand on the floor next to Harvestman). So yes, I’m predicting that Clea basically defeated a Thor. This woman, I swear.

So this is it.

I’m gonna be honest, I’ve never seen Clea this savage. And I kinda like it. Because it really makes sense, she’s been fighting Dormammu for decades and he pretty much killed dozens, if not thousands of her rebels in front of her. She was not raised by the morals of Earth, even though she learned a lot with Stephen, about empathy and life and such. But she’s also enraged at fate for keeping them apart. She’s tired of being in his shadow and she will use her inner nature to conquer Death and end her whole career.

I’m excited for this book because mostly I want to see some character development. This seems to be a Clea that just arrived in the middle of a storm and has to learn how to adapt and grow in a world without Stephen. I’m glad Wong is around but it will be hard for her to listen to him, even though they both want Stephen back.

Also we never managed to have a darker book (except maybe for Thor MAX? And Magic Bullets, but it’s not something that comes from Stephen himself). I’m still shocked and impressed, and I hope this is a good thing.

Those are gonna be long months of waiting without our beloved little meow meow but I’ll take my time to enjoy Clea. I love her.

[felestina-stilton]

Hello! It's so nice to see you doing your thing! Keep up the great work! Btw, I'm making a Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt AU for FHFIF. I am going to turn this idea into a fan comic and need encouragement, so can you give me some advice on how to get started? I hope I'm not bothering you too much. Sorry! 😣

(P.S. I am a traditional art type for now, so how can I make them more appealing?)

Hello! Thanks for such kind words, I really appreciate it 💗💗💗As for the ask thing - lucky you, I specifically make only traditional comics because digital art allways was a bit hard to me ""x3

Honestly when people ask me on "how to get started with a comic" I allways feel nervous because...welll......I literally started the first issue of my AU comic Reincarnationtale with making some random sketches and being like "this is in chronological order yea...i guess i'll make a comic out of this...yea". AAAAND THEN ONE YEAR LATER I DID A REMAKE OF THE ENTIRE THING...In fact, I did remakes of all the first three issues and currently doing a remake of the fourth one! So yup, I guess I have zero capability on speaking about how to properly start a comic :"")

BUT! Now, I have more experience in this stuff, so I can say that - WOW, starting with a proper script is VERY helpful! Since issue eight I've been writing a script for each page, describing what happens on each frame and who says what. It really helps understand beforehand what you want to fit onto the page and helps organising the whole comic itself! Then, after I make a bunch of scripts, I can start working on the pages themselves - and for this, I make...whatever THIS is:

Basically I just make small sketches of how I think the framework on the pages will look like. Sometimes the final thing can vary from those concepts, but still, it helps you realise what exactly you want your pages to look like (all of these were made for the recently published issue nine btw)

I can't really give and advice on the sketching part because uhhh....you just draw the characters you want however you want in your art style???? I dunno, everyone has a different style so yeah, no advice on that one, I guess it's preference 👉👈

And, the last thing I'll say (again, not an advice, it's preferably to each and everyone to draw however you want) - these are the things I usually use for my comics! I like making lineart with 0.1 mm liners, using 0.5 and 0.7 as highlighters. Also, I like adding a bit of colour into my lineart...I dunno, it just looks pretty. You can't see it on the picture, but, for the colouring I usually use Berlingo / PrismaColor / BOTH OF THEM pencils!

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

Comic buff with a thought, I notice the P5MM art and composition is more striking and closer to p5's art and style than the other manga, which is fine, but kinda... flat. (I find myself thinking there's something missing when I read it, then I look back at P5MM and I notice how there's more clever paneling, imagery, and stylistic choices akin to the games in it (like that one goro panel ya had a rant about) and I realize what's missing) That could be why P5MM is brought up more, just a guess. I dunno how you feel about all that though, I'm curious.

Under the cut cause it gets long cause of pictures:

I am very big on art style and visual presentation. I do actually judge a book by it's cover (manga, game, movie, show, yadda). If I find something pleasing to my eye I'll read it.....even if the contents are trash. Domestic Girlfriend is one, horrible manga (didn't finish, was holding out for Momo, aka best girl, and getting closure for her....then I bounced). Didn't watch the anime (didn't need to I was way ahead in the manga I think), but I know that opening is wasted on it. ldskfjaf Don't invest your time into it, it's not worth it, you would probably learn better morals from P5.......probably. But yeah I found the art style pleasing enough to try it out (I's not amazing by any means, but I like looking at it....or did.....that writing man....dat was bad ;w;).... *waves hands vaguely in air* yeah.

Fun fact, it's why I got into Persona. I happened across an ad for P4 on the PS2 in the Gameinformer magazine, it showed a screenshot from an animated cutscene plus one of the fully body art for the chars and I was like "Yes this is my jam!" (which only doubled down when I read what it was about, and it was a murder mystery and the article also talked up "the mystery of the glasses" which fakldjsalkfs yeah). So yeah it really clicked for me.

Tbh it's why I'm probably going to get back into freaking Bleach, and it's why I got into it and Naruto over One Piece (I don't think I'll ever read ON I'm sorry). Tite Kubo has sexy art what can I say? Can't trust a thing that man writes now but eh. It's also the reason I read a lot of Shojo (and now Yuri) manga, cause their art style is usually what I find very appealing (even if I've read the same gd shojo love story just by a different name for the 1000th time, give me the flowers and sparkly eyes! they are my life blood!)

And I've mentioned I really like Saito's art style. I've (attempted) to color some of his pieces on top of animate some manga frames (most of which I haven't actually published......I...I should....get around to finishing those up....haha...aha....haaaa). I really like his art, it's pleasant. But even with good art, I can still see past it and see what BS it's peddling and it can hamper my enjoyment of it. If I don't look at the context of the scene or the words on the page, I can be down with it. But when I'm reading.......I get annoyed. I balk at anything with Goro. I guffaw whenever Makoto's on screen (cause Saito nails her from P5, she acts useful but really she's useless but the narrative views her as useful it ironically makes her useless......it's the weirdest thing I've ever witnessed >.>). Like Saito really.....gets P5 it seems, down to it's flaws even (tho he can actually make the good parts of P5 shine, or at least parts that P5 failed to execute....execute in a way). But he also makes the flaws.....shine that much harder for me.

Now the Reg manga? it's nothing special art style wise, in fact it starts off VERY wonky, and while still wonky, has gotten a lot....better/cuter (esp Ryu). Not like shojo cute just.......I wanna squish their wittle faces cute (at times when it's not serious).

Like when it comes to Reg Manga these are the two pieces that have appeared in it that I feel kinda hit the P5 mark in terms of style:

(look at Mona, coming into this world like the pustule that he is 8U)

Which isn't much, but it's something. At least Reg's AOA is better looking than the anime. 8U

But I dunno, as the chapters go on, the Mangaka allows for more cuter expressions, and I just like their neat:

(btw I colored that page)

I dunno, it's not as overtly cutsey as Saito:

But they are still charming in a more simple way (without out having them go full chibi), it subtle but it gives it flavor. "Silly why are most, if not all those pics of Ryu and Anne?" I dunno guys maybe you should ask them how their backs are doing, cause they're the ones who are carrying the Reg manga when it comes to this! 8U

Tho I do think the first ch or two of Reg does a better job capturing P5's feel than the rest of the chapters, I think the mangaka is just.....bogged down by exposition and the game's BS that a lot of text on their pages so it almost reads like a novel:

ALots of text, not the most dynamic of framing with the panels. It's kinda eh. I haven't really read the manga past the 2nd dungeon tbh (I mean......as the residential #1 Makoto hater, I think that's fair.....that I'd start to zone out during my least fav dungeon....and then continue zoning out during my 2nd least fav dungeon askfdjaflk)

But during the first two dungeon arcs, I liked how.....bad the PT were at thieving, I liked how green they were. It was obviously a learning process. I also like some of the fight choreo (Saito did the best hand to hand one in the series in P4U's Yu vs Sho....which I actually animated....spoiler.....no I have no released that...my dumbass wants to tempt fate and see if I can redo it in color even tho it took me 4 days non stop to get that animated in just black and white.....but I am a fool so alas 8U). I mean it's not mind blowing, but it was simple and decently thought out, which is more than I feel like we usually get (esp with the anime shows....or at least P4/5's).

But I think what draws me in is....it's lack of P5 style. P5 style has them being still oh so cool despite being new at everything. It's tired me out. P5's how identity is style. It's....style over substance (gonna rile some feathers with that....Cvit(?) vid title). But P5 is overtly stylish, to the point it......weighs on me. Drags me down. Tires me out. I don't think they're cool, I'm bored with it. Ironically, Reg manga lacks that, which......def would make someone (and me usually) give it much of a passing glance. It's very basic I guess. But.....consider me, being in P5 hell, surrounded by all it's nausea inducing stylishness, sees a small break in the hellish hurricane to see.......normalcy. It kinda makes me connect better with the kids (kinda, it's still P5).

They feel like normal kids, trying to do their thing (sometimes trying to look/act cool and failing), and.....it's just the absolute antitheses to P5's brand......and I think that's why I like it. KLFJDSAFLKJA;

Anyway, who knows, maybe when I catch up on Reg in english and re-read MM with the official translation I might change my mind about a few things, or at least how I rank them. But for post length sake, and my sanity sake, I think I should keep the anime and mangas out of the "Which entry do you hate least" post......because I should just make another post where I go into both mangas as well as compare and contrast the anime! :D I'm just delaying some insanity for later haha....

Wait.........I just remember Day Breakers exists......and I liked it....still do....don't have much issue with it. Well shit, that is probably the one entry I hate the least. fklsdjfalkjdfkla;jsL;FJljsfdlskafaj *sobs* nO NO, I committed, and that's just a sad loophole. fdklsajflakfj *sobs* I still need to the game thing, cause let's be honest, the games are where it counts.

So right now my ranking for manga/anime is:

Daybreakers>Reg manga> MM>>>>>>>>>>TV Show Anime and it's OVAs (may the burn in the hell fire from which they spawned)

Oh, one last thing, forgot to put it in but I dunno where to put it now. I like how the manga tones down the pervyness some:

I mean Ryu is a fellow monkey. u_u .......but it's for the best I don't have to see his ape expression. ;w; (iirc the pyramid scene was a lot shorter/faster, but that's by the grace of reading and books rather than animation I suppose).

[my-name-is-apollo]

In one of your last posts (the one with the ven diagram) I saw that the name of a certain comic was written as l*re Olympus. Any more details on this (btw If you dislike it I can’t really disagree. I think that comic is bad).

(Answering these together)

Well, my first opinion was that it's mm okay, but then it just went downhill. I'm definitely biased because of the way Apollo is written, and there are some things that make me cringe, but keeping that aside, my honest opinion is that, even though the art is gorgeous, it's just another retelling (there are like thousands at this point maybe) of Hades x Persephone, where they're uwu cinnamon rolls (basically the tumblr stereotypes. Even Apollo is) and I feel kinda.....saturated you know. I feel like there's nothing new and find it plainly boring (and a little problematic) *insert shrug emoticon*

[shiroallura]

I can’t help but feel like people are taking the whole “they wanted to kill shiro” thing too far. I get that it’s bad if they were going to make a gay character to say they had representation and then immediately kill him. But tbh 1) I don’t think that was ever really their intention behind killing him 2) if they had killed one of the other main characters instead, people would still have had equally as much of a problem with it because most of the characters ARE minorities in some way (1/2)

3) they realized they were wrong and chose not to kill him at all (whether that was the decision of the writers or someone higher up is irrelevant). Also there is a very very good chance that they are NOT the only lgbt representation. I understand being wary of it. The writers not perfect and we are used to being screwed over by big shows when it comes to stuff like this. But I think for now everyone needs to just calm down and stop demonizing the show when we don’t know everything yet. (2/2)

Btw that ask wasn’t meant against you or anything. You are actually responding Nicely and being diplomatic towards everyone involved and I appreciate that. I just wanted to say my input on the thing and maybe get your response to that.

The thing about the “kill your gays” trope is that it’s almost never the intention. Yes, sometimes gay characters die because they’re gay. And yes, killing off a character who is gay is not always a bad thing, because they are characters just as much as everyone else. But that doesn’t change the fact that stories where gay and queer characters end up alive and happy are increasingly rare. Even in shows like Game of Thrones, where a lot of characters die, probably 99% of the surviving characters are still straight and cis, right? Meanwhile the couple of queer characters the show possibly had probably died a while ago, simply because there wasn’t a lot of them (which is the key route of the issue, tbh). And it doesn’t change that the overall scope of a lot of queer media is that lgbtq+ people don’t get happy endings, and are only interesting on screen to straight people when they’re suffering. 

There’s a reason why this year, when I saw “Love, Simon,” is what allowed me to emotionally accept that I could be a girl who likes girls and still be happy, in the end. Because it was one of the first happy gay movies I’d ever seen, and for people who already live their lives surrounded by negative statistics, we need that.

I do agree with you though, that Voltron is a show with a minority filled cast, and also rigidly boxed in as to who can die and who can not, with five paladins minimum needed to pilot certain lions to form the titular robot. I’ve been saying in s1 that if any main VLD character was going to be permanently killed off, it would be Coran, because it would be largely unexpected as he’s primarily comic relief, and would therefore hurt like hell, and he’s not usually quintessential to the plot in the ways the others are (ie. mostly because he doesn’t pilot a lion, but also because he belongs to the prior generation that the current one is trying to fix the mistakes of). 

But the fact is, is that currently in Voltron, the only LGBTQ+ rep we know we have is Shiro. We can’t stand back and hem and haw, “mm, but they might have more,” because we don’t know if they do. And if they don’t, then are we allowed to be salty? Do we have to wait? Because we have already been waiting six seasons for this. 

The issue with Shiro beforehand was that he’s always been a multi-minority character. He’s the only disabled character we’ve seen, other than Narti, who was killed off and has hardly been mentioned since then. He’s the only confirmed mentally ill character. And now, he’s the only queer character. So while most of the paladins belong to racial minorities, and it would suck if they had been killed off, it wouldn’t be on three different fronts.

And believe me, I get the struggle of having a lot of minority characters, and also writing something where a lot of characters naturally die. The original series I’m working on is a war fantasy series, and of my main lineup of seven characters, one is a pan, Asian transboy; a gay Pakistani boy; a Sri Lankan most likely bi, and disabled girl; a demi-bi-romantic/sexual boy; a gay, Black teenage girl; and two disabled, bisexual teenage girls. All of them by the mid-way point of the series are also mentally ill, and by the end of the series, one of them hasn’t made it out, and picking who it would be was a very hard choice.

But this is why varied diversity is a strength. For every disabled character you kill off, add three more. For every queer or poc character or both killed off, add five more, and so on and so forth. I have plenty more trans and queer and poc and all of the above characters, both major and minor, to balance things out. I made the conscious decision to make another one of my main characters disabled when I realized the first two disabled characters I had in the series were both ones who died, something I will carefully handle when I go back and rewrite. I have gay queens and nonbinary political leaders just because I can.

I understand that Voltron can’t do this, necessarily. Just having one queer character is a big deal for a children’s TV program. But my main take on it is that when they decided Shiro was queer, they should have decided to have him live, because otherwise, even if it wasn’t their intent or even a conscious decision, it really does feel emotionally that it was the opposite way around.

[teacupwriter]

writing process tag

thanks so much for tagging me @katiehahnbooks!! I loved reading your answers, btw. This looks like fun and I need a bit of a pick-me-up tonight, so here goes. :)

1.  What are your favorite genres and/or styles to write in?

I tend toward historical fiction and action/adventure, sometimes with fantasy elements and usually (but not always) featuring romance. I’m not a super ‘realistic’ writer so all of my stuff takes on a cartoon/comic-world quality. Probably a side effect of all the comics and Disney I consumed growing up, but I’m going with it.

2. What was the last writing project you finished and felt successful with?

Mm. Kind of a tricky question at the moment. I recently wrote and posted a Tintin fanfiction one-shot series that I felt pretty happy with at the time, but it didn’t get a great reception. So, mixed results. I think I learned that I should stick to my more natural writing mode. (As in, long drawn-out 30+ chapter stories.)

3. If you have a WIP how do you feel it’s going? What stage are you in?

I have several fanfiction WIPs (read: too many) and one original WIP. I feel it’s going at about the rate I can expect considering my current school workload. I have a title, and the core cast of characters, and a very, very rough idea of the plot, but I’m still in the research/outlining stage. Right now I’m researching the involvement of British Secret Intelligence in the Spanish Civil War (yes, England was all up in Spain’s business and, no, they were not supporting the democratic side) because my female MC’s love interest is a female British spy. Anyway, I love live for research so I may be in this stage for a while...

4. What is your favorite place to write?

Anywhere it’s quiet. Although ever since I got noise-cancelling headphones (best purchase of my life, worth every penny) that can pretty much be anywhere! I am easily distracted by other people though, so unless I’m really in The Zone I prefer to be alone.

5. Do you prefer to write long hand or type? Or some other method?

I prefer to type. I use copy and paste quite a lot when writing, and I keep a spare document open to dump discarded paragraphs/descriptions in case I feel like coming back to them. But I do brainstorming and middle-of-the-night idea scribbling by hand. Last summer when I had a job with a 1-hour both ways commute, I would record myself talking out loud about my story while stuck in traffic.

6. Do you remember your first character? If so can we meet them?

Hah, okay. I could start with my LOTR hobbit OC, Jessica, whom I invented while running around with my younger brother LARPing as Merry and Pippin (we were like 8 and 10 years old, we had no idea what we were doing had a name, of course.) I would play one side of a conversation as Merry and then hop a foot away to play the other side as Jessica. (Who was also his love interest. Of course.) Or I guess I could talk about Fudgie the anthropomorphic stuffed dog who was the star of the first story I wrote at 7 years old, which detailed his voyage across the Pacific Ocean in a bathtub. Or... my Tintin fanfiction OC I created when I was 14, who was, well, not the pinnacle of originality by any means. But I have fond memories of her, and all of them, honestly. Love your ridiculous old characters. #end cringe culture 2018

7. Where do you get your inspiration?

So many places! Sometimes the architecture of an old building, or a dual-ownership home where the top half is painted a different color from the bottom half. (Which I actually saw once in Cambridge, MA. Like, imagine an enemies-to-lovers, ‘we’re stuck renting the same house because it’s a great location but we disagree on everything’ rom com!) Super mainstream action movies tend to inspire me, for some weird reason. (My favorite - the Jason Bourne movies.) I’m inspired by museums, paintings and illustrations, historical photography and comic books... lots of random stuff.

8. Do you outline a story before writing it, or does it all live in your head until the first draft gets put down?

I outline. I outline quite a bit. But I do believe that there is such a thing as too much outlining. You don’t want to entirely snuff out the element of unpredictability. You have to trust that the story might know better than you do, and let it take you unexpected places.

9. Where do you go/what do you do when you’re feeling stuck?

That’s usually when I hand write, or open up a separate word document and just start rambling. Eventually I land on the problem, and once I know the problem, I get an idea of how to fix it. Usually. If that doesn’t work, I’ll just take a break and ignore the whole thing for a while.

10. What got you started writing/doing art? (Because I always love origin stories)

The first time I put a story on paper was for a creative writing assignment in the 2nd grade. (Earlier I mentioned Fudgie the anthropomorphic stuffed dog? Yeah, this was his debut.) The page requirement was 5 and I wrote 20 before my teacher actually stopped me, explained that it was time to turn it in, and even though I wasn’t finished, I could use three magic words: “to be continued...” I never did finish it, but I think I can forgive 7-year-old me. I was probably too busy playing with my Calico Critters.

Okay, I’m tagging @kittensartsbooks, @cabaretofwords, @patomac, @gooseandcaboose, @thewriterexfriends, and @natsacespace. Please tag me if you do this, I’d love to read all your answers!! (But no pressure of course.) ♥︎

[aurorawest]

⭐️Can you please also do a director's commentary for "Foundations" chapter 3? Thank you for your commentary on ch. 2, that was fantastic btw, :D I love that chapter!!

Yes! Thanks for asking! Link to AO3.

I used to write such short chapters, haha. This one is under 2500 words! I talked a bit when I did chapter 2 about why I wrote Foundations. Chapter 3 was actually the first chapter I wrote. It was The Scene (you know, the one you see in your head that’s the whole reason for writing the thing in the first place) for this fic, but when I write, I usually write The Scene first, haha.

Loki shifted in his camp bed, reaching up to pull the orb of light floating next to him closer before he turned the page of his book. Wind rattled the walls of the tent, but the storm outside wasn’t enough to drown out the rising and falling swells of sound from the impromptu feast that had sprung up several tent rows over. 

I remember really struggling to get the atmosphere of the setting of this chapter...mainly because I didn’t really care that much, haha. I wanted to write a fraught conversation between Loki and Thor and what to you mean I need to describe where they are? Though I actually think it turned out well in the end.

He paused for a moment, listening, knowing the right thing to do—the expected thing to do—was to be there himself. Eating, drinking, bragging and inflating whatever deeds he’d accomplished in battle that day. And singing, apparently, if the sound he could hear was any indication—and if one was extremely generous with their definition of ‘singing.’

I don’t think I’d come up with my head canon yet that Loki hates to sing at this point.

They were on Alfheim, one of the Nine Realms, which was facing a minor insurrection; nothing that Asgard’s forces couldn’t put down in a week or two. 

Sneak peek! Alfheim features prominently in the sequel to The Real Asgardians of the Galaxy.

They’d been there three days and the tide of the war was already turning in their favor. Still, it had been a shock when the Bifrost had brought them there. Years ago, Mother had taken Loki and Thor to visit, and Loki had found the planet breathtaking. Asgard was beautiful, of course, the pinnacle of the Nine Realms, but the lacy architecture of Ljosalfgard and the forests twinkling with lights was captivating. Thor had wanted to capture a unicorn and ride it; 

I draw a lot of inspiration from the comics when I write about Alfheim, since we’ve only seen one very brief shot of it in the MCU. Ljosalfgard is the capital (Ljósálfar is Old Norse for Light Elves). Unicorns are native to Alfheim in the comics.

Mother had forbidden it, and added for good measure that if he was gored, he’d have to sit in bed for the duration of the trip and wouldn’t be allowed to have any fun.

The forests were nowhere to be seen now, though. Or the unicorns, for that matter, though during that long ago visit, neither Thor nor Loki had gotten anywhere near one, anyway. The rebel army was moving towards Ljosalfgard, burning everything as it went, and the tall, graceful trees that had fascinated Loki as a child were nothing but smoldering stumps now. Whole towns had been reduced to rubble, with the bodies of those who had been unable to flee lying amid the wreckage.

In the last such ruin they’d passed through, Loki had stopped to stare down into the face of a dead elf. Her legs were pinned under the collapsed wall of a building, crushed beyond repair, but what had killed her was the discharge weapon that had been fired into her stomach. Tarry blood, turning black as it dried, was spread around her. Not a quick death, or a painless one. He’d knelt down and closed her eyes, but he couldn’t do anything about the howl of pain that twisted the rest of her face.

I added this paragraph about the dead elf during editing, feeling that my description of war was too impersonal and sanitized. Since writing this, my body count in my fics has multiplied. Now I kind of look for excuses to describe corpses.

A crack of thunder brought him back to the present with a jolt. He realized he’d been staring at the same sentence on the page, reading it over and over again. 

Mood, Loki.

With a yawn, he closed the book and set it aside on the small, ornate table he’d carted to Alfheim from Asgard. 

My pocket dimension head canon wasn’t as well developed at this point. I was imagining the table physically being carried. I’ve actually always intended for this table to make an appearance in my fic again, like Loki chucked it in his pocket dimension and sort of forgot about it, but I try to limit the amount of Asgardian stuff he’s got in there for angst value, so I’ve never had it show up again.

The book was a treatise on astral projection, wherein the author theorized that with the proper source of power, the range of the projection could be amplified infinitely. 

I still think this is clever, haha. This is a reference to Infinity Stones! Specifically the scene in Avengers where Loki astral projects and talks to the Other. I head canon that Loki really can’t astral project very far (maybe, maybe, a mile or two), but that the Mind Stone allowed him to do so in that scene.

Interesting, but not the lightest reading after a day of battle. He’d brought other books—and been roundly mocked for it

Whether Loki was being mocked or teased is open to interpretation. He can’t see it as anything other than mocking, though.

—but his focus was shot to hel. Whatever he picked up, he’d only end up sitting with it open on his lap while his mind wandered.

At that moment, the tent flap burst open, letting in a spray of wind and rain. “It’s pissing down out there,” 

The fact that Loki and Thor both have English accents makes me desperately want to make them speak British English, but I don’t because they don’t in the movies. Sometimes, sometimes, I allow myself to throw something in.

Thor said, apparently to no one in particular, because when his eyes fell on Loki, he added, “Ah. I thought I’d find you hiding here.”

“I’m hardly hiding,” Loki said. “Anyway, I was tired.” He flicked his light orb higher and expanded it with a twist of his hand so that it illuminated more of the space. 

This is the first time I wrote about this spell of Loki’s, which I now use alllll the time. It’s one of my go-to spells for him. If you’ve followed me for any length of time you’ve probably seen me talk about this fic I have where Strange goes into Loki’s mind (still unposted)—this spell is actually a major part of one section of that fic.

Thor looked at it, shook his head a little, and switched on the lights on his side of their shared tent. “What?” Loki asked, raising an eyebrow.

Generator? Asgardian tech? Who knows!

Glancing at him, Thor replied, “Tricks.”

Uh oh.

With a slight smile, Loki said, “Correct me if I’m wrong, brother, but one of my tricks prevented an axe from lodging in that thick skull of yours earlier.”

Thor snorted. “Not so tired that your wit’s dulled, I see.”

“Well, no. Never.”

Obviously, I try to capture the characters’ voices when I write, especially their dialogue, but I do it to the point where if there’s a kind of really distinctive delivery of a line, I’ll take that and turn it into almost like, a verbal tic? You know how you’ll catch yourself saying certain things a certain way, little phrases, that sort of thing? This is an intentional echo of Loki’s line in Avengers, where Thor says, “You think yourself above them,” and Loki responds, “Well yes.” I use this one all the time.

Removing the vambraces from his forearms, 

The amount of time that I have spent looking up what different pieces of armor are called, UGH. And I never remember. When I edit, I always have to double check. The only one I know for sure now is demi-gaunts because I use it so often, haha. Those are the things Loki wears on his hands in Ragnarok.

Thor chuckled, then said, “You should have joined us. No party is complete without your troublemaking.”

Loki put a hand over his heart, a grin twitching at his mouth. “I’m touched. I had no idea I was so appreciated.”

“That,” Thor said, “and the fact that Fandral couldn’t stop bragging about how many more rebels he slew than the both of us combined. I could’ve used your help knocking him down a peg or two.”

I wanted to show a few things here. One: Loki is used to Thor being dismissive about his magic, and he doesn’t actually dwell on it too much in conversation. Two: Thor’s attitude about Loki’s magic isn’t actually awful. He could certainly be nicer about it and have more respect for something that Loki is really good at it, but this isn’t something that Thor feels really affects their relationship. He’s mildly contemptuous, and he forgets immediately. And three: Thor enjoys Loki’s mischievous side. The two of them still have a decent relationship, though the cracks are showing.

“Mm. Sorry to disappoint you,” Loki said.

Thor snorted. Removing his cape and slinging it over a chair back, he asked, “What are you reading, anyway?”

With a glance at the book, Loki said, “I don’t think it would interest you.”

“I don’t think so either.” Thor smirked at him. “I’m just trying to show some interest in the things my little brother’s interested in.”

Rolling his eyes good-naturedly, Loki said, “Ah, I see. Mockery, then patronization. What a day.”

Thor chuckled and came over to pick up the book. “Astral projection,” he said, then looked at Loki. “You already know how to do this.”

Really trying to hammer (haha, pun intended) home the point that Loki is an extremely unreliable narrator. Thor asks Loki what he’s reading, then shows that he knows what Loki can do. And then:

Loki raised an eyebrow. It was always a surprise when Thor demonstrated that he knew what Loki was capable of. 

Yeah but, is it, Loki? Is it?

“You already know how to swing a sword, but you still train.”

“Hm.” Thor put the book down. “Once Father gives me Mjølnir, I won’t have to.”

Still pre-Mjølnir.

Right. Mjølnir. It had been heavily implied, when Father had sent them to quell the uprising on Alfheim, that the reward for success would be Mjølnir. For Thor, of course. For Loki, well, he supposed the reward was the satisfaction of a job well done. Once, when they’d been children, the two of them had snuck down to the weapons vault to see if they could lift the hammer. Thor hadn’t hesitated; he’d strutted up to it and yanked on its handle. It had come off its stone pedestal easily, and Thor had crowed and brandished it while Loki had stood there grinning.

Then, Thor had set it down and said, his face flushed with happiness, “You try it!”

Loki had reached for the handle. But he’d stopped, his arm outstretched, and closed his fingers around nothing but air before withdrawing his hand. What if he couldn’t? What if he wasn’t worthy? 

To this day, this bit hurts me. I find it so relatable. If you try, you might fail, so maybe it’s better to not even try? At least you won’t feel like a worthless failure that way. And on a broader character note, this is Loki as a child already feeling that he isn’t living up to expectations.

So he shook his head and had said, “Father will be angry if he finds out we came down here.”

This was a thin excuse to put off learning something about himself that he didn’t want to learn, but even at a young age, Loki had been all-too-cognizant of his own failings. Thor had looked crestfallen, which almost made him feel guilty enough to try lifting Mjølnir, despite his misgivings.

HE’S NOT THOR. This is something that I definitely address in my fic series, this idea that he’s not Thor, so he’ll never be good enough. And yes...it is something that he gets over. He stops worrying about the fact that he can’t lift Mjølnir. He begins to see the value in his way of doing things, and not in a defensive way, but in a way he’s actually proud of. He realizes he doesn’t need to be Thor because he’s Loki.

But this is waaaaaay before that, haha.

Almost.

Rain beat on the tent, which luckily was imbued with enough Asgardian technology to keep all of it outside. Winter on Alfheim, at least in this hemisphere. If the blood didn’t turn the battlefields to mud, the rain would. Loki glanced up, his brow furrowed, as thunder rumbled and a gust of wind made the canvas billow like a sail. “The weather could be better.”

“If it doesn’t stop, it will just make the battle more glorious,” Thor said.

Smirking, Loki said, “I think I find dry clothing more glorious than battle.”

Thor shook his head at Loki, looking like someone had just told a wonderful joke, but only he was in on it. “You enjoy it, admit it. You can pretend you’re above it all you like, but I see it in your eyes.” He paused, clearly wanting his punchline, or thesis, or whatever this was, to really land. “That’s the rage of battle, brother.”

This was the first bit of dialogue I thought of for this fic. I remember it coming to me while I was sitting in bed one night.

Loki somehow hadn’t expected that. Taken aback and hoping it wasn’t showing, he said, “You’re mistaken.”

[...] Thor chuckled and laid down, his hands laced under his head, but Loki remained sitting, staring at the opposite wall of the tent and fidgeting with his hands. The rage of battle. Ridiculous. If there was one thing that Loki was good at, it was not letting his emotions get away from him. 

OOF. If you thought to yourself while reading this, That doesn’t sound like the Loki I know, then you are correct! Frigga has that line in TDW where she says, “So perceptive about everyone but yourself,” and that line is one of my guiding stars for writing Loki. He’s very, very good at reading other people...but terrible at knowing his own mind. And then his read of what other people think of him gets filtered through his skewed perception of himself.

Anyway, I very much believe that Loki is horrible about keeping his emotions in check. He absolutely, when agitated, thinks entirely with his heart and not at all with his head. Here’s the thing...

He was as collected in battle as he was any other time. 

He wants to be a Good Asgardian. So in his mind, it’s controlling your emotions in battle that’s important. Other times? Not so much. As long as he does it in battle, nothing else matters. And Loki is very good about keeping his head in battle. He’s an amazing warrior, just as good as any other Asgardian.

To lose your head was to invite costly mistakes. Absently, he ran his thumbnail over his other fingernails. He feared losing himself, anyway. Sometimes he thought it would be all too easy, when he wasn’t always sure who he was to begin with.

This is one of the core elements of Loki’s character to me. He doesn’t know who he is. He fears a loss of control. I absolutely keep these things in my head at all times when writing him. These things affect everything in his life and hold him back from things he wants. Love? That’s a loss of control.

“You’re quiet, brother,” Thor said.

Loki glanced over at him. “Just thinking.”

“You think too much.”

“Possibly.”

Another intentional movie dialogue echo. “Are you mad?” “Possibly.”

Propping himself up on his elbow and facing Loki, Thor said, “This is war, Loki. You get up, you slay the enemy, you drink, you feast, and then you go to bed so you can do it all over again the next day. There’s nothing to think about.”

Life was definitely simpler for Thor back in the day.

With a slight smile and a mirthless exhalation of laughter, Loki said, “I’m not like you, Thor.”

“Really? That’s so shocking, whatever could you be talking about?”

Loki gave his brother a sidelong look. Once in a while, Thor displayed a snideness that came directly from Mother. While Loki was truly their mother’s son, some of it was bound to rub off on Thor, too. 

I’ve never liked the idea that Thor is stupid, and I do like those moments where he’s sarcastic and clever. “I thought you liked tricks,” from TDW comes to mind, and obviously a lot in Ragnarok. Loki has a tendency to think in binaries. Father=Thor, Mother=Loki (in the sense that they take after their parents, not like, Loki is maternal). He has trouble seeing that Thor also takes after their mother...and he has even more trouble seeing how much like Odin he himself is.

“I don’t mind battle,” he said. “I’m perfectly happy fighting to protect Asgard and the Nine Realms. 

It’s really important to me to show that Loki isn’t squeamish about killing people, but also that he sees it as a duty.

But you know I’d rather be sitting by the water, reading a book.”

“The water” is what I’ve come to call the body of water that surrounds Asgard’s land mass. It’s not an ocean, it’s not a lake. Here, I’m literally just saying ‘sitting by the water’ the way you’d say that if you were like, sitting on a dock or on the beach or whatever, but since then it’s become my official name for it. I like the idea that Asgardians really do see themselves as superior, and this body of water sitting around their planet is The Water, like there’s no other water.

“Or causing mischief,” Thor said without missing a beat, which made Loki shrug in acknowledgment of this point. Thor stared at Loki for a minute, and then he said, “Perhaps you should…” But then he trailed off and shook his head. “Never mind.”

“Perhaps I should what?” Loki asked, a sharp edge to his tone that he knew would put Thor on the defensive.

A flicker of irritation crossed Thor’s face. “Perhaps you should take greater pains to be more like a warrior. We’re Asgardians, Loki. We don’t hide in bushes and cast spells. We face the enemy head on.”

Aaaand there it is. Thor definitely feels this way, but he’s also more of a dick than he has to be, because Loki purposefully needled him—and Thor’s quickness to anger is one of his flaws.

Loki’s eyes narrowed. “A dead rebel is a dead rebel. It doesn’t matter if I stood in front of him and ran him through with a sword or if I distracted him with an illusion while I threw a dagger through his windpipe.” Tilting his chin up, he said, “And I hardly ‘hide in the bushes.’ Don’t be insulting.”

“The men talk,” Thor said, still sounding prickly.

Loki is the one we think of as being the one who feels like he doesn’t fit in and as though he has to maintain an image of someone he isn’t...but I’m really partial to the idea that Thor feels the exact same way. The two of them have actually had this in common their entire lives, but they never talk about it or see this basic fact about each other. They’re both trying to live up to something, and it isn’t who either of them are.

Ah. So that was the issue. There Thor had been, just trying to get drunk with the Warriors Three and the Lady Sif while they compared body counts, and it had been interrupted by the troops questioning Loki’s prowess on the battlefield. Or perhaps even his commitment to the battle itself. What an inconvenience. How embarrassing. “Do they,” Loki said, his tone flat. “And do you defend me, brother? Or do you let them talk?”

Thor rolled his eyes. “Don’t start this.”

Does Thor not really answer the question because obviously he defends Loki, or because he doesn’t, and it embarrasses him? I left this purposefully ambiguous here. Loki certainly knows what he thinks.

Loki held up his hands, his eyes widening a little in an expression of sarcastic innocence. “I thought you started it. Didn’t you just tell me to stop hiding in the bushes?”

With a frustrated sigh, Thor said, “You take everything the wrong way.”

“Perhaps you should choose your words more carefully,” Loki shot back.

Their whole relationship, summed up in two lines.

For a long moment, Thor glared. Loki tried to return it with a look of cool haughtiness. Finally, Thor said, “Of course I defend you. But when even Hogun and Sif—”

At this, Loki’s mask dropped, he knew it did, and he knew that for a split second, the hurt showed on his face. Thor’s glare slipped as well and guilt flashed across his features. 

They’re so good at hurting each other. It’s exactly what they’re trying to do, and then they instantly regret it. But it doesn’t stop them from doing it again.

Well, Loki had just told him to choose his words more carefully. It would do his brother good to listen. Otherwise you ended up saying things that other people didn’t need to hear.

Loki snorted derisively, a hard twist of a smile on his face. “I see.” The fact that Sif was bad-mouthing him stung more than he cared to admit. His feelings towards her toed the line between platonic and something more on and off for years, though he knew he’d never stand a chance with her. 

Loki definitely had a thing for Sif for a long time. He’s being wishy-washy here.

Thor was her type. Blond, muscle-y, typical Asgardian male. 

Loki’s type, when it comes to men, certainly involves muscles, just not the like, bulging bodybuilder muscles.

Which made her just like everyone else. Loki held out his hand and snapped his fingers shut, and the orb of light hovering over him snuffed out.

“Loki—”

“Good-night, Thor,” he said, his voice tight. Anger and resentment coiled in the pit of his stomach like a viper, slithering up his spine to the base of his skull so that it sat there, an intrusive otherness scratching at his mind. 

Some purposeful snake imagery; and the use of ‘viper,’ which has connotations of treachery, was also deliberate.

As he laid down, he knew it would keep him awake, and that Thor probably wouldn’t be fooled by his stillness. He could cast an illusion, so that it looked like he was sleeping, and then leave his slumbering form here and roam the dark encampment, if he wanted to.

But he didn’t want to. He wanted to not feel like an outsider amongst his family and friends. He wanted ‘Asgardian’ to encompass his particular gifts too.

Loki is definitely arrogant about his abilities, which is an interesting thing to balance, since he’s also so deeply insecure. A lot of his bitterness comes from the fact that he knows he’s good at things, but they aren’t the right things. And even when they are the right things—like being great in battle—he doesn’t do it the ‘right’ way.

“Loki,” Thor said again.

He ignored his brother and closed his eyes. Tomorrow, Thor would have forgotten about this. Thor never had any trouble forgetting the things he said and did that wounded Loki. 

This is true. Thor thinks before he speaks, but he also puts more stock in actions than words. Loki is the opposite.

That was a gift, he supposed, his face twisting in the dark. A very particular gift to be able to let go of words that hurt, one which he both hated and longed to have. Of course, Thor didn’t need to remember hurtful words, because the only person who ever flung any of them at him were Loki himself, and very little that Loki said was worth remembering in the eyes of his family and friends.

This is not true. Loki is being an unreliable narrator.

Fine. Thor would forget. Loki would try to, as well.

Thank you so much for asking!! 😄 

Fanfic Writers: Director’s Cut

[almirapeer]

Analogi Single dan Bahagia

I don't realize that I have been single for a long time and ya I could survive. I'm not dead like I said many years ago: "I can't live without you." So what do you think? It's called bucin I think.

To be honest, my first impression I saw this topic was I feel 50% happy and 50% sad. Because I'm confused, am I really happy? Hahaha and I'm happy because I have some memory about single era.

Hari ini aku flashback ke zaman di mana kata jomblo dan single itu lagi trend. Zaman di mana presiden jomblo kita, Raditya Dika sedang berada pada masa kejayaannya. Agak sedih sih sejak Raditya Dika menikah, presiden jomblo Indonesia diserahkan ke Baim Wong. Terus nggak lama lagi, Baim Wong menikah dan predikat tersebut sekarang ada di tangan Indra Herlambang. Sumpah ini kok aku mengikuti berita kayak gini? Heran.

Sekitar tahun 2013-an aku sering pergi ke perpustakaan buat baca buku-buku karya Raditya Dika. Semua bukunya menceritakaan tentang betapa hinanya menjadi jomblo, iya kan? Halaman 72 buku berjudul Koala Kumal, adalah favoritku. Di sana tertulis tanda-tanda dia naksir sama kamu itu kalau dia balas chat kamu kurang dari 5 menit. Ya ampun dulu relate banget sampai ngitungin menit ke berapa dia balas BBM aku. Apalagi kalau ditambah nonton series Malam Minggu Miko yang tayang setiap malam minggu di kompas tv. Raditya Dika dan Ryan Adriandy pemainnya. Hummm lengkap sudah penderitaan ini.

Zaman itu pula merupakan zaman aku lagi suka-sukanya sama meme comic Indonesia. Ada tokoh yang masih teringat seperti le me, derpina, dan herp yang sangat populer pada masa itu. Sampai aku beli buku berjudul Le Me Forever Alone karya Baro Indra. Aku sering mention-mentionan di twitter sama beliau. Omg kangen! *otw balik ke tahun 2013.

Twitter asik banget. Belum ada instagram eh gatau deng pokoknya aku main twitter karena hijrah dari facebook. Di twitter, setiap malam minggu ada permainan hastag dari akun memecomicindonesia. Dan hastag tersebut selalu trending. Selalu. Ada juga hastag #tandaditolak dari akun daraprayoga yang selalu trending juga. Intinya, para jomblo berkumpul di twitter jam delapan malam setiap malam minggu, bersama-sama meratapi nasib pacaran sama komputer. Kami memuja hujan deras untuk mengutuki orang-orang yang keluar malam pacaran pada saat itu. *emot evil. Nah kan, jadi inget film Radio Galau FM.

Lagi satu, akronim yang trend: Jones. Artinya ada dua. Jomblo ngenes atau jomblo full of happiness? Tinggal pilih sesuai keadaan aja. Lah btw, ini alurnya kemana? Kok malah ngalor ngidul ngasih kuliah. Mm.. Bukan gitu, lagi nostalgia aja. Ok next.

Kesimpulannya, menjadi single itu bahagia nggak? Jujur sekitar tahun 2012 sampai 2016-an jadi single rasanya ngenes abis. Tidak bahagia. So, I have crushing on someone, always, bhahaha. Kalau abis putus, galau, move on, pasti ada aja aku nge-crush-in orang. Sampai pernah temenku cerita kalau dia belum pernah suka sama orang and my response? "Nggak mungkin!"

Eh masuk SMA, nggak punya crush. Males jatuh cinta males galau-galau lagi. Terlebih saat SMA aku punya banyak kesibukan dan ada prioritas lain yang harus kuurus. Sampai aku inget aku pernah bilang ke temen sebangku di kelas 11, "I promise that I won't confess with someone until I'm graduate." Just until my graduate? Nyatanya keterusan sampai sekarang hahaha padahal ibuku sudah memberi restu aku boleh have a thing with someone kelas 11 SMA.

Masuk kuliah, males lagi. Kayak nanggung nggak sih? Sebentar lagi lulus terus kerja. Ya, masih banyak waktulah. Takut berhenti di tengah jalan. Karena usia dua puluhan ini udah bukan perkara main-main lagi. Aku sih masih santai dan bahagia aja selama masih banyak teman-teman yang single juga hahaha. Ibuku ini yang malah berisik nanyain cowok-cowok omg not this time, mom! I'm okay, happy, always, sure.

#30dayswritingchallenge #day6

[chaoticquips]

Tagged by @linklyshow :D

Fictional characters you relate to?

Mm... not sure! Although, Edward Elric (FMA:B) and I are both short as hell, explosively emotional and hate milk so... 

Book you can read over and over without getting tired of it?

Midnight Circus by Erin Morgenstern! It mashes a lot of stuff that I really love and don’t get enough of together. History, real magic being hidden in plain sight, ofc the tragic love story, and there’s also some gay shit in there as a bonus~ Each character is written super individualistic too.

The Book of Lost Things by John Conolly is really good too! It mixes up old-syle fairy tales (the real, gruesome kind) all together, along with history and was very interesting! 

I love books <3 

What’s your favorite comfort show/movie?

Teen Titans (2003) for sure! I’ve re-watched that show so many times I’ve lost count. 

Also, ironically enough, Shrek used to distract me from vomiting as a kid, so that’s what I watch when I get so sick I can’t even get out of bed...

Which fictional character are you most defensive over?

Ehhh... I don’t have the energy to get defensive over things... But!! I do have a metaphorical bubble I put all my favs in so nothing can h u r t  th e m. 

Show you fell out of love with?

Hetalia: Axis Powers. First anime I ever watched. Had a cool concept but it was the beginning of middle school when I watched it for the first time and it has bad memories attached to it now...

Show you’re most excited for?

YOUNG JUSTICE SEASON THREE YOUNG JUSTICE SEASON THREE YOUNG JU-

What’s your aesthetic?

Soft... @sonialiao ‘s work is a pretty good example. (Love the TimKon comic btw!!) Um! I don’t really have a defined aesthetic?? I do love fall/dark colors tho.

Favorite fanfic tropes?

MMMMMM Anything involving a wing AU, slow burn friends-to-lovers, whoops-didnt-know-I-was-in-love-w-you, hanahaki disease, magical mishaps...

I tag @twenteesevun, @oiqawas, whoever else idk.

[rubyxsapphire25]

Not where you came from// Stangst ficlet

Hey guys, this is probably my first submitted GF fanfic based on my ask with @pinesinthewoods​ about ‘amnesiac’ Stanley eventually having false memories. This is also will be the Stanuary prompt week one: home. So i hope you’ll enjoy, sorry if its bad tho especially the grammar… or the plot.

my other stanuary prompt over here. This is now edited btw.

Ford huffs loudly carries another bunch of heavy luggage outside the shack. Heavy, since they will be both moving out of the shack that is now the property of one of Stan’s working staff. Before he heads towards the door, a voice spoke behind him.

“Mr. Pines, do you need help?”

He turned around to see a huge, young man in his 20′s whom he previously called a ‘large, hairless gopher’ few weeks ago but Ford smiles softly knowing that he somehow bears no ill-will whatsoever towards him in return.

“Oh… well, I asked Stanley to carry these for me several minutes ago. ” he said as he puts down the luggage then he looks around, looking for his brother, “I wonder where he’d gone to…”

“I saw him pacing around the shack. He’s… really thinking about something.” Soos replied.

Ford hummed lowly. Maybe it’s something he wants to talk about… or maybe it’s his memories returning recently.

“I want to talk to him. Where is he now?”

“Upstairs.”

He then proceeds climbing through the staircase. If it’s something about his memories, then he won’t miss in what he is remembering or what is worth telling. After all, he couldn’t fully comprehend the images that kept flashing inside his head.

Good thing that Ford is there to clarify his events in his life.

Or maybe he is excited to tell Stan their childhood. He loves telling stories with his brother since it’s one of the ways he spends best with him at long last for thirty years they’d been separated. Even if it’s bad to admit that he is pleased to have his mind erased, either way he can finally have a longer conversation with him.

He always deserves to know.

He passed by Stan’s bedroom, only to walk back after finding him silently looking at the mirror. Ford stepped inside as he calls out to him.

“Stan.”

Stan darts his eyes towards him and smiles, “Oh hey, Ford. Done with the luggage already? Or maybe you’re just slackin’ off.”

“Am not! It would be done by now only if you’re helping me.” Ford pouts in which Stan could only laugh at his reaction.

“Heh. Really sorry ‘bout that…”

Stan went silent again as he looked up in the ceiling with an unknown emotion. Ford took a long, worried glance at his brother and sighed lowly at the realization.

Maybe… he’s not ready to tell me. I should buy him some ti-

“You know, I’m gonna miss this place…” Stan abruptly says as he faces Ford.

Ford grins in return as he places his hand on his twin’s shoulder, “Yeah, me too.”

“And the whole Gravity Falls, too. You know, at first… didn’t like this place. Well right now, I’m glad to stay ‘ere for much longer.”

Ford felt relief at his words, “Felt like home, isn’t it? Despite everything else that’s around here… ”

“Heh, weird vibes ‘n all, no kidding. I hated this place because of what this place did to yer fingers after you were born.”

“What” Ford couldn’t believe what he was hearing, or maybe it’s just his metaphor gone wron–

“I don’t what Pa sees in this place, even we both born ‘ere. ” Stan chuckled weakly.

He couldn’t say anything. Listened to his brother with his eyes widen in shock and his chest throbbing as if it was being punch by Stan– with just mere words acting like rock-hard fists.

Something’s wrong here. No, Stanley ! You weren’t born in this place. I DRAGGED you here ! Oh God…  Could this be my fault? !

“I hated this place so much that we sneak out to the beach a lot of times.”

“There’s no–”

“We even ran away from that… hey, umm what was that again… well, it doesn’t matter, I guess we’re being chased by a lot of monsters just to get to that be- ”

“Stanley, just.stop.” Ford interrupted him, gripping his brother’s shoulders just to face him.

Stan pulled away his hands from him, “Hey, ahh… Ford just what– you-you okay”

He stayed silent as he lowers his head.

“Is this something about the monster’s name I know you’ll be mad if I don’t know it correctly– ”

“No. That’s not it…” Ford muttered while clenching his fist.

Stan noticed he was trembling, “Hey, I… know you liked this place ‘cause it’s weird. I’m sorry if everything I said seemed so offensive.”

Ford couldn’t take it anymore, none of that really happened to him… both of them. Why does he really have these kind of fabricated memories inside of his head???

Unless…

“Stanley, you don’t understand. You weren’t born here ! ! ”

“P-Pardon??”

Ford bit his lip, glancing over Stan’s surprised face. Ford avoided his gaze again when Stan narrows his eyes mixed with confusion and anger, “You’re… not… from here. This place is not…where you came from.”

Stan propped his hand on his forehead, “W-what d’ya mean, Ford? I stayed here for like 60 years… ”

“Stanley… ”

“We both stayed here. This is our HOME, you know that!! ” he is beginning to raise his voice.

“Stanley, please.. ”

“That’s what I remembered!!”

“That’s what you remembered, Stan. You remembered WRONG ! ! ” Ford snapped back which made Stan look at him with surprise .

Stanley steps back away from him with utter perplexity etched in his face, then began sitting on a chair behind him, “That’s not true… ”

“Stan… ” Ford knelt down in front of him. He lets out a long silent sigh and said,  "You’re trying to forget what our dad did to you, aren’t you ? “

“No… that’s not true… I never forgot about Pa… ” He replies with his quivering voice.

Ford places his hand on his shoulder, “… and why is that?”

Stan sobbed, “B-because he loves me, he’s proud of me… I reminded myself every moment of my day to keep on living, because he does everything right for me… even if it means living here. This is my home.”

“Stanley… you legally never lived here. You lived at New Jersey… we both are. But you… well, not for long. Pa kicked you out, because you destroyed my project and he was thinking you were only getting in our way. ”

“…Is that how you thought of me ? ” Stanley asked his brother but couldn’t look at him.  

“That’s what Pa wanted you to believe. I used to be, honestly. But looking back to all those good things you did to me, I would never gone this far without you. You were right about having a silver lining, Stan. ”

Ford leaned forward to hug his twin brother,  "I wish I could’ve said it… about you letting you live here thirty years ago, then finally you will have a home again. I’m so sorry, Stan. This is all my fault. I knew that you lived in car by just looking at you for the first time after a decade we’ve have been apart. I was just… too carried away… by mm-my research… I…  ”

Ford tries to stifle his cry but failed, he let his tears fall from his eyes as he gripped his brother’s back harder. He slightly jumped when Stan wrapped his arms around him as well.

“ It’s okay, Poindexter. I dun need a building for a home. Look at us, Stanford, we’re home because he had each other. Guess, I don’t need to know how I got here in Gravity Falls in the first place. ”

Ford sniffs one last time as they both let go. He wipes his tears and look at his brother with a smile.  "Yeah, I guess… but I wanted to tell you, so you would know it. “

Stan replied with a grin, “Nah, maybe not this time, okay. I may have went too far this time, even when its not real. I’ll just tell you when I’m ready for another trip down through the memory lane. ”

“Sounds good to me. ” Ford chuckled.

CRAAASHH

Both old men shifted their attention from each other towards the source of the sudden noise.

“Soos!??” Both of them yelled from the room in unison.

“Sorry, Mr. Pines-es! This thing is really…heavy… ” Soos replied as another loud thud can be heard downstairs,  "Oh, no. “

Stan looked at his brother and said, “Welp, I guess it’s time to help him before he breaks our fishing equipment. ”

Done… and just for one day ahahaha. Ended it with a comic relief and that’s good… probably. I hope you like it.