#my fam and i *still* quote it

[todayisafridaynight]

i think i would have gone loco if jo and aoki got to meet up just once after ichi breaks through to him like. the damage to my psyche id have wouldve been immeasurable, irreparable even

[littlestuffstohide]

AA Fic Rec

I've sunk on AA so bad. I have such a long list. Almost 100 on my bookmarks. Here is my attempt to organize my bookmark list. I know I created a list before But this is better. I'll start of with my general AA WrightWorth List fic recommendation I've bookmarked since I sunk into this rabbit hole. Buckle your seats because this post is going to be reaaaally loooong. I tried to clean it as much as possible. So if you guys are looking for some AA WrightWorth treasure trove, this is it. I'm sure there are some I've read and missed. I will update my list as much as possible. My summary is literally bare to none and just my spoilers and hints what I love about it so mmmuuuch!

all there is - by sunsmasher. Narumitsu oneshot - A mix of bad Krisnix and goodness Narumitsu.

Summary: Phoenix and Kristoph during the seven year gap, Phoenix and Miles after it.

love most definitely requited - by The_Eclectic_Bookworm

Summary: cute hananaki au that of course involves confession in an unexpected way.

Pressure - by ApprenticeofDoyle

Summary: A different view/ canondivergent AA with the Feys. My ALL-time favorite AA fic of all times. AA with dash fam on Feys/Wright. It also has some great wrightworth pinning. And you will love the flow of wrightworth. There are still a lot of feels on this. It would be a crime not to read this. There is, like 4 parts on this. This one is complete. Read it! Here's the link for Pressurverse series.

if i woke up (next to you) - by ApprenticeofDoyle

Summary: Post Engarde Trial based on Pressureverse post Engarde Trial if that make sense. An canon divergent on pressure fic.

miles edgeworth's terrible, no-good, very bad week - by ApprenticeofDoyle

Summary: AAI but with Phoenix. Everything with Phoenix on AAI. Like I love it for many reasons. The WrightWorth is there but this is juuuuust so good. I'm low-key hoping for part 2 to have Phoenix altho that's least likely to happen. I juuuuust want Phoenix interacting with uncle Ray yknow!

a lie like a litany, cold and reformed - by fictitiousregrets

Summary: Where Miles bluffs about being engaged, gets engaged, gets married, and realizes they're in love and married. One of my favorite rom coms of all times. Really Wrightworth insanity.

Happier Than I Deserve - by KrisseyCrystal (IceCreAMS)

Summary: Pride and Prejudice representing Miles and Phoenix. Need I say more? This is going to be one marathon of wrightworth. Binge yourself on this monster fic. And really worth it to read.

where the heart is - by chameleonwrites

Summary: How Phoenix's home charmed Miles? Spanning from childhood until they move together, Real cute. I love for any Miles POV.

Trust Issues - by chameleonwrites

Summary: Phoenix sees plane tickets. Cue the angst. Wrightworth trying to make you cry.

The Catch-up Game - by theacegrace

Summary: Post AA6 Phoenix character study. Real good fic that's utterly sweet. It had lovely moments to angst moments, great confession to some wright family antics. A sin not to read. Never fails to tear me from the confessions?

Childswap - by theacegrace

Summary: WrightWorth switching children for a day. Real cutiiie fic! This never fails to put smiles on my face.

reading between the lines - by The_Eclectic_Bookworm

Summary: Another tearjerker. It starts tearing you to pieces then sweetening you with the fluff. And the last chapter is worth all the angst! A roller coaster fic. Basically Miles spanning from the horror of Manfred to Phoenix to great Franzy and Miles sibling love and back to Phoenix! Spanning the first 3 games.

Legal Partners - by Miggy

Summary: Oh boy. Another monster fic that's just so worth it. Fluffy and ansty and fluffy. A betting game between Klavier and Miles on who can show their? defense attorney how much they appreciate them as a legal partner. Quoting Phoenix in this fic a pissing contest between the two of them. Has some Kpollo but really more of Wrightworth goodiness. Anyone who hasn't t read this is a crime.

It Would Feel So Good To Make You Mine - by hi_its_ellis and lowbatteryhealth

Summary: Love is War but WrightWorth style. Literally flirting contest, knowing all the rules without talking and just driving the entire LA crazy while they both wait for the other to confess. My all time favorite WrightWorth rom com insanity. I don't feel bad at all. It will make you laugh so much.

A Fool for You - by bluemoodblue

Summary: Engaged but at the same time did we get married 4 months before the wedding? And it's not Vegas! This is just so romcom and just so good and sweet. I won't say anymore!

The PlayWright - by WingSongHalo

Summary: Miles visits a local theater where he meets a very intriguing actor who seems so much like someone. Really, really good. This is just one of my favorite WrightWorth fics.

Project: Matchmakers - by WingSongHalo

Summary: Literally everyone shipping Wrightworth and a club shipping WrightWorth and trying to get them together. Really adorable. Many cute parts. It has 3 parts found here. You will love the proposal on part 2 and part 3 is cute and lovely due to many reasons.

time goes by so slowly (and time can do so much) - by ohallows

Summary: AU AA magical universe Miles being a caseworker featuring Phoenix! Phoenix director of orphanage of magical pips. Really good!

Out of Order - by canolacrush

Summary: Falling in love backwards Phoenix style. Phoenix is sooo seduced that he runs from his husband who suddenly looks 100x hotter.

Chicago Noël by canolacrush

Summary: Mafia Miles and Baker Phoenix. This is also ooone monster fic. It's adorable and lovely in so Many levels. You will love the switch in roles for Miles and Phoenix. One of my fave fics! Forgot to tag this. I'm sorrry!

Earning it - by thebigeish

Summary: WrightWorth except Miles is his sugardaddy. It just hits me in a cute way.

all the ways to love - by hi_its_ellis

Summary: where Phoenix has his gay awakening and he figured it out late? Some internal homophobia. Really close to my heart.

Written - by Limey

Summary: Where Phoenix finds Edgeworth's fanfic.

The Opposing Counsel's Proposal - by the acegrace

Summary: Where WrightWorth tries to propose to each other with mix results. Really funny and you will love every second of foolishness of these two competitive dorks.

The Defense’s Proposal, Post Facto - by Kantayra

Summary: Where WrightWorth decided to get married during lunch because the paperwork drove them nuts. They pretend to try to be convinced but we all know how eager they both are.

The Perenial Pursuits - byDeiRyuu

Summary: Larry misunderstanding that whenever anything Phoenix related happens, Miles is the speed dial.

justice vs state - by sinkburrito

Summary: Apollo running errands for Phoenix and Miles over an envelope. Apollo at the same time being oblivious. Poor Pollo. Basically WrightWorth involving Apollo for their feud.

Sick of Leaving - by Jodalyn

Summary: WrightWorth sickfic. Miles POV. You would want to read this. It's adorable! Just wants to make you hug their sweetness.

they'll never love you like I can - by Jodalyn

Summary: Chief!Miles College Phoenix. Time Shenanigans. Miles meeting Phoenix. I'm so weark to Chief Miles meeting Baby College Feenie.

despite everything, it's still you - by orphan_account

Summary: AA novelization with analysis on how Phoenix and Miles view each other. There are a few aspects in this fic I could never forget which is just my favorite thing. Read it. You will love it. Spanning from childhood through Post AA6 I think.

Myths We Don’t Believe In - by hi_its_ellis

Summary: Cue Chief Prosecutor invites current BF and his not really exBF in the same room, in the morgue. Miles did this to himself. Sorry for langworth Miles. And Miles lost any braincells he had. Cue Jealous Miles.

Anytime, Anywhere, Again - by hi_its_ellis

Summary: Part two of Mythes We Don't Believe In. This is literally Phoenix roasting Miles on his decision. I love this one.

(confetti) (smile) (heart) - by lvl99arsene

Summary: Just Phoenix FINALLY upgrading his phone. This was just so cute and Phoenix being a menace! Feat Sugar Daddy Miles.

Change in Perspective - by chameleonwrites

Summary: Maya and Franziska having a betting contest on which brother is pinning for the other. Feat. Miles being the biggest victim of this spectacle. All betting fics are sooo fun. This is also one you shouldn't miss. Just feel sorry of Miles as the victim.

Phoenix von Karma - by Otoshigo

Summary: Canon Divergent AU where Phoenix had been declared all dead until He comes back with no memories and as a Prosecutor. One of my all time fave. If you want a german speaking Phoenix, read this! I love this for many reasons. Sadly, expect no Apollo or Trucy on this.

i can bring you to bathe in the river - by oredatte

Summary: on of my fave AUs. My fave trope for WrightWorth. To adopt Trucy, our lovable pair gets (platonically) legally married, moving in together, co-adopting an eight-year-old, and keeping it all a secret.

Of Haircuts, Pocketwatch Chains, Other Uninteresting and Undesireable Things, and Generic Wholecloth Christmas Magic - by ribbontype

Summary: Back to romcom WrightWorth gift-giving competition. One of my favorite fics due to how said men drive each other nuts.

Fixer Upper - by poodlepunk

Summary: Miles getting Phoenix's help to renovate his house. Renovating houses is just my guilty pleasure in fics. Domestic WrightWorth.

Tomorrow - by marttyyriroskis

Summary: From 7 Year gap through Spirit of Justice. There is so much angst here. Also cue the fluff and drama on AA4. You will love the way the writer handled the mess capcom made. I just love this fic due to some special moments. You will not regret reading this monster fic. Prepare all the tissues!

where are you going? (i've been looking everywhere for you) - by whackamacka

Summary: Kimi no Na Wa except WrightWorth style? This is it! Setting is between 3-1 to 3-4. feat BratFeen.

abracadabra! - by ohallows

Summary: Kay and Trucy shenanigans making WrightWorth dads panic. ahahah.

now i don't hate california after all - by ohallows

Summary: Kay and Trucy gossiping and plotting. Kay and Trucy are literally born to be sisters.

parallelogram - by zombiekittiez

Summary: A cute but nicer BratFeen Fic. Canon divergent au featuring Defense Attorney Miles and theater major Phoenix. It's Miles who Dahlia meets instead.

ticking time bomb in their chests - by harmony

Summary: Timetravel fic just so Phoenix finally gets the realization he needs. We all love time travel fics!

The lies we tell ourselves - by Danypooh80

Summary: A retelling of AA except of a surprise OC in this fic. I melt for this fic for all the time. You will love every second of this!

Everything Changes - by Danypooh80

Summary: More of a Edgeworth-Wright family fic? Direct sequel of The lies we tell ourselves. A must read for part 1. Just expounding on the first fic with so much fluff you will melt with the fluff!

Turnabout Ideals - by felicia_angel

Summary: AA but a magical AU? It's full of feels. Way too many Phoenix angst. This is part 1 of 6 Currently. Part 5 is my fave! Read all to understand the universe. Nulls and Voids series - series link!

Set Sail and Cannonballed - by Almod

Summary: WrightWorth navigating the beginnings of their relationship in their very busy life. Something about this fic hits me with how much I love it!

The "B" in Butz stands for "Bondage" - by JajaLala

Summary: Larry wants to learn bondage. Miles runs away, Phoenix appreciates the art. I love this for hilarious reasons.

bear trap - by ghostcatamount

Summary: feat Omega Phoenix. Were it not Phoenix, this would just be creepy about his pre-heat. SInce this is our fave Phoenix, he is just not so subtle and Miles being the oblivious Alpha is such a treat!

by the book - by zombiekittiez

Summary: Drunk Miles barging in at book clubs to confess. Miles being drunk is always a treat.

Rise from the Ashes, again and again - by theinkhiddenwithin

Summary: Romantic fairy tale featuring fated paired Miles and Phoenix. This is it!

Happy Accident - by Jodalyn

Summary: Phoenix had a rough day except Miles bought the wrong paint but Phoenix turns it around by changing his canvas.

we sleep and set fires - by fictitiousregrets

Summary: Dreamsharing WrightWorth. This is one beautiful incption like fic.

a crow's trial - by Charrelous

Summary: role reversal au featuring defense attorney Miles and Prosecutor Phoenix. one of my fave aus. Also my guilty pleasure tropes.

Through Time and Space - by Northernflicker

Summary: time traveler Phoenix and immortal Miles? You will love this, spanning through different eras of history.

Should be Pretty Mundane - by KrisseyCrystal (IceCreAMS)

Summary: Phoenix makes a discovery about himself that he is so embarrassed about. And Miles, of course, figures it out.

One step at a time - by OuterWilde (foreveraugust)

Summary: Post AAJ. Phoenix plans to reinstate himself as a lawyer and confess to Miles. Real cute lovely fic! Phoenix also being oblivious about how good he is as a lawyer.

take it like a man - by tudoo

Summary: Literally Phoenix is dramatic about suit shopping. Spanning 2 decade events. I love how dramatic Phoenix is and how endearing Mia and Miles are here.

co-signed - by tudoo

Summary: WrightWorth goes house hunting until angst ensues. Reaaaally adorable with a splash of angst.

Shear Luck - by TopazEstrella

Summary: Legit Pianist Phoenix and Barber Miles. The post-apocalyptic barbershop AU that no one asked for but we all secretly needed.

it's only love - by Jodalyn

Summary: Miles and Phoenix marriage through the eyes of Gregory Edgeworth. Makes you tear up!

Phoenix is Out of the Loop - by Living_Death

Summary: Miles decides to take up knitting until it drove Phoenix nuts! It's sooo adorable. There's literally a knitting club plus Apollo and Miles.

Change of Heart - by actual_goblin

Summary: Miles had an operation and Franziska and Maya happened.

Eavesdropping - by SapphireWine

Summary: Miles asleep and eavesdropping on Maya and Phoenix post Engarde trial. Quick and short but we just love how comfy Miles is in using Phoenix as a pillow.

Maybe In Time (you'll want to be mine) - by YourAverageBystander

Summary: Time loop shenanigans. aka: Phoenix's terrible, horrible, no good, very bad, 2,400 hour day. What something Phoenix picked up on is my fave part of this!

where there is a flame (someone's bound to get burned) - by Samioli

Summary: Love lessons by Phoenix. It's good but these two constipated lawyers are pinning while having these sessions. Cue the angst.

An Anniversary Like Any Other - by Kantayra

Summary: Married WrightWorth just banter through anniversaries til they reach their old age.

Drunk on Kisses - by Zhuletta

Summary: Miles 5 + 1 drunk on kisses and he admits it on the last one. Real cute and adorable!

Turnabout Dishwasher - by zuzsenpai

Summary: Trucy asking Miles to keep an eye on her dad while on a trip around the world. Very dialogue AA style. You will love it! literally 3 fics in 1 fic if that makes sense. Turnabout Exchange Chapters are other pairings basically. There are a lot of pairings in this fic!

Texts & Turnabouts - by YanagiKana

Summary: explored AA love. really lovely shots. While WrightWorth here being my favorite, there are other tons to love here.

the bookstore at the corner of 14th and fen - by kbots

Summary: feat bookstore owner Miles and Single dad Phoenix. Reaaaallly fluffy and adorable on so many levels. Artist Phoenix creeps up. Extra Cute Trucy is here!

New to the Neighborhood - by paxton1976

Summary: Literally Phoenix and Miles being neighbors except the noise drove Miles nuts. Composer/Pianist Phoenix. AA but without the crazy drama? Very domestic life!

Seeing Is Believing - by paxton1976

Summary: Miles gets new glasses and he finds Phoenix 100x beautiful. Miles realizing how he also loves Phoenix and also somewhat obsesses on Phoenix too.

The Wooing of Phoenix Wright - by crayoncompanion

Summary: We've seen lots of fics Phoenix chasing after Miles. This is where the opposite happens. It's literally the title. Expect some angst tho. And some tear jerker moments but worth every tissue. You will love it!

The Art of Seduction: Is for People Less Attractive than Miles Edgeworth - by crayoncompanion

Summary: feat Sexy/hot Miles dropping all the hints for Phoenix to make a move but he sort of waves it off and acts ignorant about it? This is sooo funny on so many levels. It never failed to crack me up.

Love, Lust, and Libraries - by crayoncompanion

Summary: library au. It's soo good feat Miles and Phoenix clashing so muuuuch before they get each other. How can library AUs not be fun?

Angel of the Screens, Demon of the Courtroom - by JustNerdyThings

Summary: AA1 but Phoenix as a famous actor who became a lawyer. All good stuff. Where there is smol range of death for AA1. Pure gold comedy. Famous celebrity Phoenix is a riot having that Feenieness to him with money to spare to drive the world mad. Mia and Miles are the best worsties at law.

Guilty As Charged - by JustNerdyThings

Summary: Our wrightworth is mooning, everyone is trying to matchmake but it's not really needed? Another gold comedy wrightworth fic. Or Just torture Apollo with matchmake shenanigans that's really not needed.

Of Unravelled Knots - by Ekat

Summary - Very wholesome? Some really angsty in some parts only at the start majority. This fic is stuck to me because Miles narrative is hilarious to me and everyone literally roasting his house and I love how much of a BI Phoenix is on him and the times he decides to be petty.

Miles Bunworth Petitioned Bunshot Extravaganza - Ophelia_Writes

Summary - Everyone petitioning Miles in a bunnysuit. A part of A Brief Rest for the Defense fic. Loosely. Only need to know Miles messed up and Maya and Franziska happened. Somewhat post AA3.

[ast4rg1rl]

incorrect quotes ✫

Main masterlist 

next part

y/n: Do you take constructive criticism? aonung: I only take cash or credit.

✫

y/n: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me. aonung: We're the best thing that's ever happened to you? y/n: Yes! tsireya: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

✫

y/n, negotiating with aonung: We have tsireya. Give us ten thousand dollars and they will be returned to you unharmed tsireya: Whoa, whoa, wait, you think I’m only worth ten thousand dollars? y/n: tsireya: MAKE IT ONE MILLION– y/n: TSIREYA STOP

✫

y/n: *Gently taps table* aonung: *Taps back* tsireya: What are they doing? neteyam: Morse code. y/n: *Aggressively taps table* aonung: *Slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK

.

roxto: Just be yourself. aonung: 'Be myself'? roxto, I have one day to win y/n over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me? lo’ak: Couple weeks. kiri: Six months. neteyam: Jury’s still out. aonung: See, roxto? aonung: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?

✫

lo'ak: *Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat* aonung: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents lo'ak: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you tsireya: Actually I did the math, aonung would have $225, not $0.15. aonung: Fam I’m right here.... roxto: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :) lo'ak: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please? roxto: Sorry I only have a dollar lo'ak: :( tsireya: Hey I just realized my brother is right, aonung would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent roxto: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice tsireya: You can buy anything you want with $22,500 y/n: Yeah and they want soda and apply juice tsireya: Apply juice to what neteyam: Directly to the forehead aonung: Great chat everyone

✫

lo'ak: I’m an idiot. aonung: tsireya: roxto: y/n: lo'ak: neteyam: If you’re waiting for us to disagree, this is going to be a long day.

[nox-mask]

Twst gay incorrect quotes

I hope you all enjoy it <3

Jamil: I feel like doing something stupid.

Kalim: I’m stupid, do me.

Kalim: Hey, wanna take a shower with me?

Jamil: I have a gun in that nightstand beside the bed. If I ever say no to that question, I want you to take it out and shot me because I’ve obviously gone crazy.

Jamil: Just a minute. I need to go take out the trash.

Kalim: Oh. We're going out?

Jamil: Wh...

Kalim: Wow, Jamil, you want to hold my hand before marriage? How awfully lewd of you.

Jamil: We literally slept together yesterday.

Kalim: That's NOTHING compared to the lewdness of holding hands.

Kalim: Know why I called you in here?

Jamil: Because I accidentally sent you a dick pic.

Kalim: *Stops pouring two glasses of wine.* Accidentally?

Epel: Jack is too tall for me to kiss them on the lips. What should I do?

Ace: Punch them in the stomach. Then, when they double over in pain, kiss them.

Ortho: Tackle them!

Sebek: Dump them.

Deuce: Kick them in the shin!

Jack: No to all of those! Just ask me to lean down!!

Sebek: If I fall…

Ortho: I’ll be there to catch you.

Ace: *looks at Jack* What if I fall?

Jack: Then I’ll fall with you, never leaving your side.

Epel: *watches these two interactions*

Epel, to Deuce: And if I fall?

Deuce: I’ll be the one who pushed you.

Epel: Just be yourself.

Deuce: Really? Epel, I have one day to win over Ortho’s parents.

Deuce: How long did it take for you guys to like me?

Jack: Couple of weeks.

Ace: Six months.

Sebek: Jury’s still out.

Deuce: See Epel? ‘Just be yourself,’ what kind of garbage advice is that?!

Jack: From now on we will be using code names.

Jack: You can address me as Eagle One.

Jack: Sebek is “been there done that”.

Jack: Ace is “currently doing that”.

Jack: Epel is “it happened once in a dream”.

Jack: Ortho is “if I had to pick a gal”.

Jack: And Deuce is..

Jack: Eagle Two

Deuce: Oh thank god.

Epel: Is it still visible? Where Sebek slapped me?

Jack: Your face looks like a don't walk signal.

Ace: Your face looks like a photo negative for the hamburger helper box.

Deuce: A palm reader could tell Sebek's future by looking at your face.

Ortho: The phrase 'talk to the hand cause the face ain't listening' doesn't work for you, because the hand is your face.

Epel: ...A simple 'yes' would've sufficed.

Sebek: Fine! Judge all you want but...

Sebek, points at Ortho: Married a lesbian.

Sebek, points at Deuce: Left a man at the altar.

Sebek, points at Jack: Fell in love with a gay ice dancer.

Sebek, points at Ace: Threw a girl’s wooden leg in a fire.

Sebek, points at Epel: Lives in a box!

(Silas in my Scarabia oc he is Kalims younger brother. Ashton is my Octavinel oc and he is Azuls younger half brother)

Deuce: Silas, we need that!

Silas, holding Sebek over a trash can: Nope.

Deuce: Gimme it—

Silas: It’s garbage.

Yuu: We all have our demons.

Yuu, grabbing Ortho: This one’s mine.

*Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’*

Deuce: Thanks fam!

Ortho: Oh no.

Silas: *cries* I love you too.

Ashton: Sounds fake, but okay.

Sebek: *A flustered mess*

Yuu: Can I get a refund?

Jack: Tommorrow's garbage day.

Silas: I can't believe they made a whole day dedicated to you.

*talking about Ashton*

Epel: They are beauty.

Ortho: They are grace.

Silas, runnning into the room: THEY CAN DESTROY THE HUMAN RACE!

Ace: *is wearing silk pants* How does this look?

Ashton: Like its slips on and off really easily.

Ace:

Ashton: No, I didn't mean it like that-

Sebek: We know what you meant.

Epel: look Ortho, I'm not slut shaming you but...

Epel: Actually yeah, I'm TOTALLY slut shaming you.

Ashton: What are you in the mood for?

Sebek: World domination.

Ashton: That's a bit ambitious.

Sebek: You are my world.

Ashton: Aww...

Sebek:

Ashton:

Sebek:

Ashton: OH.

Ashton: Oh~

Floyd: *banging a pen on the table out of frustration*

Riddle: Stop that. How would YOU feel if I banged you on the table?

Floyd: I—

Floyd: I don’t know the correct answer to that question.

Azul: If we were in prison you guys would be like my bitches.

Idia: Do you think sex without love is a sin?

Floyd: If it is, I’ll see you in hell

Azul: Go fuck yourself.

Jade, smugly: Sure, but only if you watch

Jade: I know every song to ever exist it doesn't matter if it's from the past, present or the future.

Floyd: Oh yeah? Then continue this.

Floyd: I don't cook I don't clean-

Jade: So let me tell you how I got this ring.

Jade & Floyd: .....

Jade & Floyd: GOBBLE ME, SWALLOW ME-

Azul: You know my motto: carpe diem, carpe noctem, carpe coles.

Idia: Seize the day, seize the night, what’s the last one?

Azul: Seize the dick.

Azul: Caffeine no longer keeps me awake while I work, so instead I have Idia periodically send me texts saying ‘we need to talk.’

Azul: It gives me the right amount of adrenaline and fear I need to keep going.

Azul: Do you want to explain the text you sent me last night?

Idia: It was autocorrect.

Azul: Autocorrect wrote "You're so hot. Please step on me."?

Idia: Yes.

Azul: I want you back...

Idia: 3 words, 8 letters. Say it, and I'm yours.

Azul: I got food?

Idia: ...you know me so well.

[redak-ted]

i have more incorrect quotes and its the fruity four + the certified dilf and his traumatized husband

Miles: Man, traffic's a pain in the assssss.

Hobie: Daddy's home!

Gwen: Just call him Bayer, or Bear or something, Daddy is reserves for your mother to use.

Pav: I'm about to have one less girlfriend in a minute.

Miles: This food is too hot… I cant eat it.

Hobie: You’re very hot, and I still eat you.

Everyone at the table: silence

Gwen: YOU GUYS ARE DISGUSTING!

Pav: One dinner… I just want ONE DINNER!

[The group is a prison cell that was just hit by an earthquake]

Miles: Uh, I'm gonna roll a perception check of… 4, and see if our cell is, uh, in any way damaged by this quake

Hobie: You're in a prison cell :)

Gwen: You did great. Well, I got a 10-

Hobie: You're in a prison cell with bars on it

Pav: I got a 1!

Hobie: You're in… a cube-shaped place.

Miles: On a scale from “damn Daniel” to “fre sha vaca do”, how are you feeling?

Hobie: In between “it’s an avocado, thanks” and “how did you defeat Captain America”, but as a solid answer I would say “I don’t need a degree to be a clothing hanger”. How about you, Gwen?

Gwen: Probably “road work ahead”.

Pav: I speak many languages, and this is none of them.

Miles: Dammit, Hobie!

Hobie: What?! It wasn’t me!

Miles: Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, Gwen!

Gwen: Not me either.

Miles: Oh…Then who set the house on fire?

Pav: whistles

Miles: On the count of three, what's your favorite cake? One, two, three-

Miles and Hobie, in unison: Chocolate cake peanut butter frosting with chocolate chunks!

Gwen: Our turn, Pav! One, two, three- vanilla!

Pav, deadpan: I've never had cake, what is cake.

Gwen, about Miles: Apparently we’re getting someone new in the group.

Hobie: Are we stealing them?

Pav: New or used?

Gwen: Wonderful responses, both of you.

Gwen: Just be yourself.

Hobie: 'Be myself'? Gwen, I have one day to win Miles over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?

Pav: Couple weeks.

Peter: Six months.

Miguel: Jury’s still out.

Hobie: See, Gwen?

Hobie: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?

Miles: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

Hobie: What if it bites me and it dies?

Gwen: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Hobie, learn to listen.

Pav: What if it bites itself and I die?

Peter: That’s voodoo.

Pav: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

Hobie: That’s correlation, not causation.

Miguel: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?

Peter: That’s kinky.

Miles: Oh my God.

Miles: Bye Hobie! Bye Gwen! Bye Pav! Bye Peter! Bye Hobie!

Gwen: You said ‘bye Hobie’ twice.

Miles: I like Hobie~

Miles: That's it, we're gonna go out and find what we need!

Pav: To the city?

Miles: Yeah, no matter what!

Peter: Well- How exactly do you propose we do that, exactly?

Miles: I… I don't know!

Hobie: Oh come off it, be serious!

Miles: I am serious!

Hobie: You're insane!

Gwen: Why, if only we were all wiener dogs, our problems would be solved!

Everyone:

Miles: What???

Gwen: Or maybe it was a basset hound!

Hobie, panicked: YOU'RE ALL INSANE!

Miles: What did you guys get in your yearbook?

Gwen: 'Prettiest Smile'

Pav: 'Nicest Personality'

Miguel: 'Most likely to start a bar fight'

Peter: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'

Miles: Would you guys be there for me if I was going through something?

Hobie: Nope, absolutely not.

Gwen: I hope it sucks, whatever you're going through.

Pav: I hope it emotionally scars you for the rest of your life.

Peter: I hope you reach out to me so I can ignore you.

Miguel: I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing I could've changed that outcome.

Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’

Miles: Thanks fam!

Hobie: oh no

Gwen: cries I love you too

Pav: Sounds fake but okay

Peter: A flustered mess

Miguel: can i get a refund

[inthedayswhenlandswerefew]

Comet Donati [Chapter 10: Through The Dark] [Series Finale]

Series Summary: Sex, drugs, boy bands. You are a kinda-therapist recruited (via nepotism) to help Comet Donati through a recent crisis. Things are casual with Aegon, very not-casual with Aemond. Loosely inspired by One Direction.

Chapter Warnings: Language, references to sexual content (+18), drugs, alcohol, smoking, mental health struggles, pregnancy, bodily injury, death, miscarriage, AND NO OTHER CLUES, HAPPY READING!!! 🥰

Selected Chapter Quote: “What made you want to be a therapist?”

Word count: 6.4k.

Link to chapter list (and all my writing): HERE.

Taglist: @doingfondue @catalina-howard @randomdragonfires @myspotofcraziness @arcielee @fan-goddess @talesofoldandnew @marvelescvpe @tinykryptonitewerewolf @mariahossain @chainsawsangel @darkenchantress @not-a-glad-gladiator @gemini-mama @trifoliumviridi @herfantasyworldd @babyblue711 @namelesslosers @thelittleswanao3 @daenysx @moonlightfoxx @libroparaiso @burningcoffeetimetravel-fics @mizfortuna @florent1s @heimtathurs @bhanclegane @poohxlove @narwhal-swimmingintheocean @heavenly1927 @echos-muses @padfooteyes @minttea07 @queenofshinigamis @juliavilu1 @amiraisgoingthruit @lauraneedstochill @wintrr13 @r0segard3n @seabasscevans @tsujifreya @helaenaluvr @hiraethrhapsody

Thank you for loving the insane and incomparable Comet fam. I hope you enjoy the series finale. 💜

Night sky, string lights, reverberating bass, warm wet verdant air like the earth the dinosaurs knew, swampy and thick with beasts. With his lazy, dreamlike smile—a kind contagious glow, pink sunburned cheeks that match the clinking Salty Dog in his hand—Aegon says: “What made you want to be a therapist?”

You won’t tell him the whole truth. But you’ll tell him part of it. “Sigmund Freud.”

Aegon is intrigued, raised eyebrows and a crooked grin. “The guy who thinks everyone wants to fuck their mom?”

“You would have liked him. He did a lot of coke.” You take a swig of your Salty Dog: rosemary, grapefruit, the singeing bite of gin. “He was the founder of talk therapy. And, yeah, some of the things he wanted to talk about were…unorthodox. Misguided. But still…”

“He just wanted to talk,” Aegon says softly, understanding now.

“This was the turn of the century, okay? This was back in the days when they were pulling people’s teeth out, locking them up in asylums, injecting them with diseases, cutting off parts of women that made them unruly, ungovernable, immoral.” You shudder. “And Freud said no, just talk to them. Just figure out what demons they have chained up in their skulls, dark dusty corners buried way down deep, and help them figure out how to move forward. It’s not about having a cure, a pill or a scalpel. I mean, how ludicrous would that be, thinking I was walking around with some failproof silver bullet to make all the pain of existence vanish? That’s insane. It’s about listening to people, and caring about people, and shining a light on what part of them already knew was there. I don’t have a cure for anybody. Not a single goddamn person on this planet. But I can help them find their own.”

Aegon watches you, contemplates you, studies you like something rare and fleeting. “You are going to be one hell of a therapist.”

“I don’t know about that. But I hope so.”

“I’ll find you. Maybe when you’re done with school you can work on me. I’d keep you busy, I guarantee it. I’m like Disney’s Haunted Mansion. Ghosts everywhere you look.”

You laugh, shaking your head. “You are never going to remember me.” He is never going to remember this place, this time, the way he shared his light with me like a long-lost comet clipping by Earth.

“I might,” Aegon says. He sips his Salty Dog with his elbows propped on the table, his blond hair whipping in the indigo wind, grains of salt on his lips, reflections of string lights like stars in his eyes. “I really think I might.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Your arms thrown around his neck, your face buried in his black t-shirt, inhaling smoke and dust and the coppery sharpness of his spilled blood. You are sobbing uncontrollably, gasping, shivering, wild prideless tears and clawing fingers. Jace’s words circle in your skull like a moon around its planet: Nobody escapes the indignity of becoming a regret. Aemond is trying to calm you, to quiet you. His hands—large and dangerous and bloodstained and careful—are on your back, in your hair. You have to explain, to repent. You have to make him understand.

“I didn’t get pregnant on purpose,” you moan into him, a jagged rush like a hemorrhage. “I swear to God I didn’t. I wouldn’t do that to you. I wasn’t trying to trap you or fix you or use you. I’m in love with you, Aemond, I wanted you, and I still want you, and I thought you would hate me and I was terrified and I didn’t know how to tell you—”

“I don’t hate you, I could never hate you,” he’s saying, and more that you can’t catch; his words are a tide, flowing in and fading out. Now there is pain, deep and sharp and collapsing. Aegon is standing a few yards away, tears flooding down his sunburned face; they clear tracks in the dust that coats him, that coats everyone, that sticks to the blood on your legs. Cregan has pushed the others back, but still, you can hear their incorporeal voices: Jace asking what’s going on, Rhaena explaining, Baela shrieking, Criston shouting orders. Now Aegon has a rough hand on Aemond’s shoulder and is telling him something—insisting upon something—but you don’t know what. Language escapes you; language abandons you.

There are sirens and flashing lights the color of rubies, roses, tangled arteries. Aemond scoops you up and carries you towards them. There is only enough room for one person to ride in the ambulance with you; there is no discussion of who it will be. The rest of Comet has to wait for the Escalades to arrive at your parents’ farm. You do not try to steal a glimpse of the damage, felled trees and scattered fence posts, dead cattle and pillaged earth. You are filled with enough wreckage already; you are built of it, bones made out of bent nails, nerves of barbed wire.

Needles into your arms, chemicals into your bloodstream: something that deadens the pain and muddies your thoughts, makes them slow and heavy and unpanicked, like you are watching this happen to somebody else. In an exam room, nurses strip your clothes away and wipe the red from your skin, routinely, absentmindedly, as if it is of no consequence, as if the future you had taken for granted has not just been drowned, immolated, eradicated from existence like a dying star. They give you underwear fitted with a bulky postpartum pad—the same used by mothers of living children—and a hospital gown that Aemond marks with bloody fingerprints when he touches you. Then the nurses leave you to wait for the doctor with your IVs and your fogbank mind and your glazed eyes that stare blankly at the sterile white walls.

Aemond is smoothing back your hair from your face, and you are reminded of how he held Aegon when he was dying on your bedroom floor in the MGM Grand. You remember once thinking that Aemond is like storms and rogue waves, and that’s true; he turns lethal and then goes kind again, strikes and then soothes. He says once you are alone, each word painstakingly chosen: “I’m sorry that because of how I’ve acted, you felt you couldn’t tell me.”

“I’m sorry I lost the baby.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do. I must have. I’m bleeding too much.” You can feel it, blood and clots that ooze, gush, drain away leaving you cold and hollow.

The exam room door opens, not a nurse or a doctor but a man in khaki cargo shorts and a filthy neon green tank top and matching Crocs, clop clop clop. “Hey, Stargirl,” Aegon says, sad and gentle. He holds up a venti-sized plastic cup. “I brought you a Double Chocolatey Chip Frappuccino.”

You blink groggily, not knowing what to do with it. Aegon puts the clear cup in your hands, the green straw between your lips. It’s sugary, cold, rich, topped with a swirl of whipped cream and chocolate syrup. It brings you back a little bit, a few unsteady steps towards the real world.

“Where the fuck is the doctor?” Aemond asks him.

“The nurse said she’s on her way. They’re understaffed.” Aegon shrugs apologetically: Missouri bullshit.

“You get somebody in here, right now.”

“What do you want me to do, threaten to stab medical professionals?! How about you punch some of their teeth out, I bet that would help.” Then Aegon sighs shakily and covers his own face with his hands. “It wasn’t…it wasn’t mine, you know?” Wasn’t, isn’t, will never be. “We haven’t…not since…it’s not…” He looks at Aemond with large, shining, ocean-blue eyes. “It’s not possible. You have to know that. You can’t be the way that you are sometimes. You don’t get a few weeks to come around to doing the decent thing. You have to believe her.”

And Aemond says softly: “I do.”

The door opens again and a doctor steps through it, mid-forties, thick black-rimmed glasses, dark hair secured in a businesslike low bun. Aegon ducks out of the room; the doctor gives him a brief quizzical glance before introducing herself to you. You can’t seem to latch onto her name. You answer the questions she asks you as she readies the ultrasound machine: ten weeks along, blunt force trauma to your back, where and how it hurt before the pain was drugged out of you. She unfastens a tie on the side of your hospital gown and opens it just enough to spread the cool gel across your belly and then glide the transducer through it. She peers at the grainy screen. She’s checking for a heartbeat; she’s checking to see if you’ll need a D&C to help expel a partial miscarriage so you don’t go septic.

“I lost it,” you sob, breaking down again. “Aemond, I’m so sorry—”

“Don’t. Please don’t.” He kisses your temple and then rests his forehead against yours, tears glittering in his river-clear right eye.

“Well,” the doctor says with practiced, vaguely sympathetic composure. “You lost one of them.”

You look to her, not understanding. “One of…?”

She angles the monitor so you and Aemond can see. “Fraternal twins often have separate amniotic sacs and placentas. So depending on the positioning of the fetuses, it is possible to miscarry one but not the other. This one on the left here…” She indicates it with her index finger. “It’s…it’s no longer viable, unfortunately. You’ve already passed most of it. But this one on the right…” She squints at the screen, repositioning the transducer. “From what I can tell, it seems to be holding on. Let me see if I can…” She moves the transducer around, pressing it into the yielding flesh of your belly. And then you hear it: a fierce defiant drumming, a whistling like wind through leaves. “I thought so,” the doctor pronounces, smiling. “There’s the heartbeat. The pulse is approximately 155 beats per minute, which is typical.”

One of them? I didn’t lose one of them? “Aemond…?”

When you turn back to him, he’s staring at the flickering black-and-white whirls of bones and blood flow on the ultrasound screen. And the expression on his face is one that you’ve never seen from him before, serene like when he’s with animals, awed like when he studies the galaxy, and something else too, a great shifting, a clicking into place, tectonic plates and ocean currents and storm clouds unraveling into clear skies. “It’s alright?” he says, not taking his eye from the screen.

“It is,” the doctor confirms. “Measuring a little bit small for ten weeks, but that’s to be expected for a twin. I don’t think you’ll be able to tell the sex for another month, but it’s alive and well.” She freezes the image on the screen, sets the transducer aside, and cleans the gel from your belly. “Based on my experience, in cases like this, I’d say there’s a better than 50/50 chance the surviving fetus can be carried to term.”

You say: “What can I do…? I mean…there must be something I can do to help it…to help it live…”

“We’ll give you medication to stop any residual uterine contractions and antibiotics to prevent infection. I’d like to admit you for observation, just for a day or two. And I would recommend bed rest for several weeks. Until you’ve reached your second trimester, at least.”

“Yes. Anything. I’ll do anything.”

“And sir, you’re…” The doctor peers at Aemond through her glasses, really scrutinizing him for the first time, his brutal scar and his blind left eye and his stillness and his wonder. “You’re the father?”

Aemond nods, still gazing at the screen like a constellation in the night sky, like a comet only glimpsed once in a lifetime. “I am.”

The doctor beams. “Congratulations,” she tells both of you. And then she leaves to arrange for you to be admitted to the hospital.

“I’ll stay,” Aemond says. “When the band flies to New Orleans tomorrow, I’ll stay here with you.”

“No, Aemond.”

“I’m staying. I’m not going to leave you. You need me, the baby needs me.”

“No,” you say again. “What we have now is wrong. It’s painful and volatile and doomed.” You lay your palm against his scarred face, and he doesn’t finch away. “You have to figure out who you are after Comet. And so do I.” Tears in your eyes, tears on your cheeks; but on your lips is a soft, patient smile. “Aemond, I don’t want me and the baby to be a distraction from the work that you still desperately need to do. I don’t want to be a temporary fix. I don’t want to be your life raft. I want to be…if I’m going to be anything to you…” Your thumbprint ghosts across his cheekbone, tender, reverent. “I want to be your home.”

He shakes his head, but he doesn’t speak; drops like rain spill down his right cheek, dyed pink by blood from the fresh lacerations that riddle him, new scars and ancient pain.

“What are you thinking?” you say.

“I’m thinking that you’re right. I fucking hate it, but you are.” He swipes away tears with one bloodstained hand, then he settles it on your not-yet-showing belly, a place of ruin, a place of hope. “When can I come back?”

“When you’re ready. And only you’ll know when that is.”

The exam room door opens again, and your parents rush in like water through a cracked dam. They are frantic and fretting, peering around bewilderedly.

“Lord almighty, what the hell happened?!” your dad booms; and your mom doesn’t even think to chastise him.

“I’m okay, Daddy.”

“You got hit by somethin’? Are they gonna do an x-ray? Your mother and I finally made it back home from church, trees and power lines down all over the place, and that boy was waitin’ on the front porch to tell us where you were. You know, the big one. The one with the godawful ponytail.”

“Cregan,” your mom offers.

“Cregan,” your dad says.

“It’s a man bun, Daddy. How’s the farm?”

“We ain’t too bad off. A couple cows dead, half the herd out wanderin’ since the pasture fence blew away. Me and the dogs gotta bring ‘em on back, but your mother and I had to see you first. Did they check you over good? Can you come home today?”

“Sweetheart, there’s…” Your mom’s voice is alarmed. “There’s blood on your gown, on your face, what happened?”

“Well, I, um, the thing is…” You try to tell them. You begin crying again instead. As you sniffle and avert your eyes—afraid, ashamed—Aemond stands and extends one large, scarlet-streaked hand. Your dad shakes it tentatively. And then Aemond explains for you: the child you’ve lost, the child you’ve kept, what has to happen next.

“I am responsible,” Aemond says as they gape at him, half-ecstatic and half-horrified. “And I know that this didn’t exactly happen in the traditional way, and I know that there is a lot of work left for me to do to prove myself worthy of your daughter. But I hope in time you’ll be able to forgive me. Because it seems that we’re going to be family.”

Your mom squeals and hugs Aemond. Your dad hugs you. They stay until you are settled in your own private room—small bed and clean sheets, drugs trickling into your veins—and only then do they listen to your insistence that you’ll be okay until morning, that they need to go home to take care of the farm. They leave with their arms around each other, exchanging murmurs like vows. Then Aemond asks if you feel well enough to see the band. They want to say goodbye.

“You’ll miss me,” Jace says confidently, then swoops in to smack a kiss on your forehead before anyone can stop him, bouncing dark curls and smirking mouth. Aegon jabs him in the ribs, Criston rolls his eyes, Aemond glowers like he’d enjoy putting Jace in need of another 28 dental implants. “If you ever get sick of mentally ill blonds, just let me know. The kid doesn’t change anything. I dig MILFs.”

“Thanks, Jace. I guess.”

“We’ll still see you around, right? You’ll visit us, we’ll visit you?”

“Yeah. I won’t disappear.”

“Good.” And then again, more somberly: “Good.”

Rhaena is dabbing at her gentle, doe-like eyes with a Kleenex, leaning into Luke for support. Criston is gallant. Daeron is optimistic. Baela is exasperated that you told Rhaena you were pregnant but not her.

“I didn’t tell Rhaena,” you counter. “She just happened to be the person who accompanied me on my ill-fated adventure to procure Plan B in Tokyo at like 2 a.m.”

“Which did not work,” Rhaena adds, sniffling into her Kleenex.

“A cautionary tale,” Jace says to everyone. “You hear that, fellas? When in doubt, wrap it before you tap it.”

Baela nods at you. “Luckily, she doesn’t seem too disappointed.” Her eyes flick reticently to Aemond where he sits in the chair closest to your bed, a presence in the room like skies that could turn in an instant, quiet, preoccupied, protective, dazed. “And neither does he.”

“I’m not,” Aemond confesses. He laces one hand through yours and brings his lips to your knuckles, willing the baby to live, willing himself to be better for you both.

“We’re going to talk later,” Cregan tells him sternly. Talk about what it means to be a father.

“Yes,” Aemond agrees.

And then Cregan says goodbye to you too, his cool greyish eyes growing peculiarly warm, his steely exterior chipping away like flecks of old paint.

Aegon is last, the only person left in the room with you and Aemond. Grinning beneath sad eyes, he presses a hand to his heart, and then to yours, and then to your belly. Starboy, Stargirl, Starbaby. Then he says: “Do you want me to hide under your bed so they can’t kick me out when visiting hours end?”

You smile tiredly, exhausted and in pain, pain of the body and pain of the soul. “You have to go, Aegon. Thousands of screaming fangirls will be waiting for you at Arrowhead Stadium.”

He is stunned. “I can’t perform tonight, obviously.”

“Yes you can.”

“No, I definitely can’t.”

“You can,” you say. “You have to. And more than that, you want to. You’ll regret it if you don’t. You live for being Comet’s disaster playboy. I’m not going to take that away from you.”

And then Aegon whimpers: “You can’t leave me.”

“You’re leaving me first.” You beam up at him, caressing his sunburned face, threading your fingers through his disheveled hair. Aemond observes this with curiosity but no suspicion. “This isn’t goodbye, Aegon. I’ll see you again. You can add me to the long list of girls you FaceTime.”

He laughs. “Okay, Stargirl. Okay. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“For more than a day, right?”

“For all of them. Forever.”

And then he’s gone, riding that elliptical orbit out into all the corners of the world that he will glow for: New Orleans, Miami, Rio de Janeiro, Sao Paulo, Bogota, Buenos Ares, Lima, Santiago.

Aemond swears to you: “I’m coming back.”

“I hope so.”

And he tilts up your chin and kisses you, tasting like smoke and dust and blood and desire, and it takes every atom of you, every string of muscle and rusty speck of bone marrow, not to crumble and beg him to stay. You are still at war with the part of you that wants to surrender as he stands and walks out of the room. He does not look back; he can’t without losing his nerve.

In the night, he returns to you, long after visiting hours have ended. Perhaps hundreds of millions of dollars have a way of making formalities disappear. He is only a silhouette in shadows like dawn, dusk, midnight. Aemond climbs into the hospital bed and catches you as you fold into him, whispering to you that everything will be alright, telling you how sorry he is, lulling you into a fitful sleep against his chest, his warmth, his heartbeat. And in the morning when you wake up alone, you wonder if any of it was real.

Did I dream that he was here? Did I dream that I ever met him at all?

But no, he has left you proof, something tangible, permanent. On the nightstand is Aemond’s small square vintage lighter; Targaryen is etched into one side. And there is something else too, a single piece of black paper with two sentences of starlight-colored ink:

I’m coming back.

I love you.

~~~~~~~~~~

It’s October, and the leaves are turning from emerald to topaz, garnet, tiger’s eye. You carve pumpkins with your parents on their front porch. You bake apple crisps and sweet potato pies. You feed the pigs, brush the Australian cattle dogs, buy baby supplies with Aegon’s Amex Black Card. You decide to let the grad student and her Giant Flemish rabbit keep your apartment downtown until your lease is up in the spring. You’d rather be here on the farm, even when you’re not on bed rest anymore. You’d rather be home.

You listen to Comet Donati, The Script, Coldplay, One Direction. Rhaena and Baela mail you boxes of crochet comets and stars and planets for the baby’s room. Aegon mails you boxes of Comet’s new donut-themed merch. Now your dad sometimes tends to the beef cattle in boy band t-shirts. Aegon FaceTimes you two or three times a week, sends WhatsApp messages nearly every day. But you rarely talk about Aemond. It’s too painful, it’s too much of a temptation. You cannot imagine others seeing him, hearing him, speaking to him without needing to do it yourself in the same way that you need oxygen and gravity.

The week before Halloween, you begin spotting. You sob hysterically as your mom drives you to the hospital, convinced that you’re losing this baby too, that everything you touch is damaged and defenseless and doomed. You’re fine, as it turns out, and the baby’s fine too, but even after you’re back at the farm you can’t stop shaking, can’t stop imaging the wet heat of blood on your thighs.

You break down and call Aemond. And you talk for five hours until the sun rises, you in a rocking chair on your parents’ front porch, Aemond on a hotel balcony in Santiago, Chile in the shadow of the Andes Mountains. He says he’s working on something, but he’ll come back now if you ask him to, he’ll board the jet and land in Kansas City in time for supper at the farm, and you can hear the backsliding desperation in his voice: Please ask me to come back. Please just fucking ask me.

But it’s not time yet. He’s not ready, and you both know it. You agree not to call each other again until Aemond returns to you. If he returns to me. Neither of you can sleep for days afterwards. Neither of you can open the door a crack without the other rushing through.

One morning you shuffle downstairs in your Cookie Monster pajama pants and oversized NSYNC t-shirt to find your dad eating a heap of homemade pumpkin waffles in front of the television in the den. All five Australian cattle dogs are perched expectantly at his feet. “Them boys of yours are on Good Morning America.”

“What? Really?”

Yes, they are; they’re celebrating the conclusion of their record-breaking world tour and teasing a new album with an interview and two songs. You catch the end of the first one, their new single called Magic, during which the boys run haphazardly around the neon-lit studio, Jace tears off his donut-themed tank top in protest, and Aegon flubs no less than three lyrics.

Robin Roberts is saying: “Now stay tuned for a very special performance coming up next after a commercial break. We’ll be moving to our outdoor stage in Times Square where a sizeable crowd has formed, and we’ve been told that Comet has a surprise in store for us! What do you think it could be, George?”

“I don’t know, Robin,” George Stephanopoulos replies gamely. “But no matter what it is, I’m sure it will have all those young ladies out there screaming!”

Lara Spencer chuckles. “And not just the young ladies either. I’ve been known to attend Comet concerts on occasion.”

Robin says: “Oh no, Lara, are you a Cregan girlie?”

“Okay, yes, I confess, I am kind of a Cregan girlie…”

You get yourself a plate of pumpkin waffles and return just in time to see the camera panning over the crowd outside: shouting, cheering, waving posters and showcasing their homemade t-shirts.

Robin Roberts announces: “And now, with a cover of One Direction’s Through The Dark, here is the illustrious, incomparable, incredible Comet Donati!”

“No way,” you murmur, staring rapturously at the screen.

“You like that one?” your dad asks, tossing pieces of waffles to the dogs.

“It’s my favorite.” And Aemond knows that. I told him in Singapore.

The stage is empty as the first acoustic notes ring out. Then Daeron trots into view—radiant and cheerful in his donut merch—to sing the first lines:

“You tell me that you’re sad and lost your way

You tell me that your tears are here to stay,

But I know you’re only hiding

And I just wanna see you…”

Aegon appears next, clopping in his sparkly pink Crocs. He flips his hair around and winks mischieviously into the camera as he sings:

“You tell me that you’re hurt and you’re in pain

And I can see your head is held in shame,

But I just wanna see you smile again

See you smile again…”

And now the crowd is not just loud but deafening, and you’re so shocked the plate of pumpkin waffles tumbles out of your hands and onto the floor for the Australian cattle dogs to devour, because who bolts out onto the stage next is not Cregan or Luke or Jace but Aemond Targaryen, wearing Aegon’s beloved donut merch and his Adidas sneakers and his scar and blind eye bare for the world to witness. They don’t seem to take any notice of his maiming at all. They screech and hyperventilate and reach for him, awed, ecstatic, touching his outstretched fingertips and his sneakers like the relics of a saint. He is focused, perhaps nervous, but he is smiling. His voice is velvet-smooth and pitch-perfect.

“But don’t burn out

Even if you scream and shout,

It’ll come back to you

And I’ll be here for you…”

The others arrive, and now all six of them are singing the chorus in harmony as they traverse the stage, dodging each other’s chaotic spins and leaps, waving to the crowd, checking on Aemond with encouraging furtive grins and squeezes of his shoulders. Luke is beaming. Jace shoves Aemond playfully and almost gets flung off the stage in return.

“Oh I will carry you over

Fire and water for your love,

And I will hold you closer

Hope your heart is strong enough,

When the night is coming down on you

We will find a way through the dark.”

“Huh,” your dad says. “They ain’t no Johnny Cash, but they’re pretty good, I reckon. I thought Aemond wasn’t on stage much anymore.”

“He’s not.” And you smile wistfully as you watch him, right here with you and yet a world away, real and yet intangible, facts and myths and faith. “But now he knows he has a choice.”

On warm nights, you sit on the wraparound front porch and flick Aemond’s square metal lighter to life, shut it, ignite it again, a lonely golden spark in an ocean of darkness, a star in the night sky. And voices circle in your mind like satellites:

I think history is important.

Whoever you are when you’re in high school…that’s sort of who you are forever, you know?

I’ve never met anyone like you.

Aemond would want to be involved.

What the hell do I know about being a decent father?

Our father never cared about us.

It’s not just for me. It’s never been just for me.

“Please come back,” you whisper to the infinite emptiness of the universe, so softly you can barely hear yourself.

~~~~~~~~~~

It’s November, and you are finally showing more than you can hide beneath hoodies and sweaters. The attendees of your parents’ Southern Baptist church—who glimpse you at Walmart or McDonald’s or Freddy’s Frozen Custard or 7-Eleven—gossip about you ceaselessly, venomously, with pity but no compassion. And your parents, who have been politely ignoring jibes about you for a decade, do more than just ignore it this time. They clear out their church mailbox and walk out the front door together and never go back. They’ve been shopping around for a new place of worship. Your mom says they might get really experimental and try out the Methodists.

Rhaena sends you pictures from her and Luke’s trip to the Mammoth Site in South Dakota. Baela has you on speakerphone when she tells Jace she wants to take a break. She’s completed two ballet school auditions already, and has scheduled two more; at least one acceptance seems imminent. You call Cregan to ask him how to prepare for parenthood. You call Criston to ask if he’d be willing to serve as a reference. He writes you a five-page recommendation letter and tells you prospective employers can contact him any time, day or night. You are hired as a therapist by the University of Missouri. For now, to accommodate your high-risk pregnancy and copious doctor’s appointments, it is a part-time remote position. Your parents are at last forced to get internet for the farmhouse. Your dad starts watching beef cattle raising tutorials on YouTube. And oddly, when you begin taking appointments with college students struggling with breakups or parental pressure or substance abuse, you don’t feel nervous at all. You feel like you’re doing exactly what you were made for.

One morning, you receive a WhatsApp message from Aegon: I wonder if bumblefuck Kansas has the Rolling Stone…

Missouri, you reply, and then you go to Walmart to check. Sure enough, there are numerous copies in the magazine aisle, and that’s a good thing, because a plethora of teenage girls are scrambling for them. Aemond is on the front cover, smiling faintly; his scar and cloudy blind eye are neither centered nor hidden. And he isn’t wearing black. His suit is a deep, lush green like jade, summer grass, ivy. The title reads: Aemond Targaryen is Out of Hiding.

You begin reading. He talks about exactly what happened at the Budokan. He talks about the label’s unilateral decision to excise him from the band. He talks about feeling lost, humiliated, pitied, ignored, unlovable. And then he shares what changed him. He says that he met with other survivors of facial trauma: soldiers, professional athletes, people involved in car and motorcycle accidents. He says that he sat down with half a dozen different therapists until he found one that he really liked. He chronicles the process of finding purpose again in a way that is truthful and inspirational and yet—to you, anyway—conspicuously vague. He is still somewhat involved with Comet’s songwriting and will likely perform with them once or twice per year, he wants to advocate for people living with disabilities like his…but what else? What else?

I think what I want people to know is that progress isn’t instant, and that nobody can do it alone, Aemond writes. I’m only where I am today because of the support of a lot of extraordinary people. I want to thank Comet Donati—Luke, Cregan, Aegon, Daeron, and Jace—as well as our tour manager Criston Cole, who is like a father us. I am immensely grateful to my mother Alicent and my sister Helaena. I am indebted to the fans for the unconditional love they have shown me.

But most of all, I owe my recovery to a therapist from the American Midwest. She can be a little pretentious sometimes, but we don’t fault her for that. She’s earned it. Thank you, Stargirl. I hope this planet is treating you well.

Smiling, glowing, you close the magazine, take it to the checkout counter, purchase it along with five KitKat bars. The baby can’t seem to get enough of them.

Two days later, you have another ultrasound done—your fourth—and at last you are able to give Aegon the answer he’s been zealously hounding you for. You message him on WhatsApp: You’re going to have a niece!

!!!!! he replies almost immediately. And then: Name her Aegonella.

Probably not!

As if you have any better ideas??

You share a few from your list: Celeste, Luna, Aurora, Halley…

Aemond literally just said Halley, Aegon types back. Like right before you did. And then: He’s very excited, omg, omggggggg it’s so cute. Thirty seconds later: Wish you were here :(

“Me too, Starboy,” you murmur as you sit on the couch in the den with Belmont sprawled across your lap. Then you send: I’m scared he’s not coming back.

He is, Aegon replies. He’s working on something. You’ll like it.

And you have to believe this, blindly, faithfully, trusting that something is real even when you can’t see it. You have no other choice.

You beg your dad not to slaughter any of the pigs for ham, and he reluctantly agrees. At Thanksgiving dinner, half the dishes on the table are vegan. You’re trying out new recipes. You jot down the ones you like best in a notebook Luke sent you: black pages, white ink.

~~~~~~~~~~

It’s December, and there are stockings hung by the fireplace and a blanket of snow on the ground. You and your parents pick out a Christmas tree at a local farm, and your dad chops it down and throws it in the back of the Ford F-150. Inside your mom’s CD player in the kitchen spins David Archuleta’s Christmas album. As your bump grows, you keep running out of clothes that fit; Aegon is always happy to mail you more donut-themed merch. Thanks to his persistence, they stock nearly every size known to humans. Baela gets her acceptance letters. Aegon gets to make out with Taylor Swift in the Colosseum. They are photographed together in Rome by paparazzi one day and then never again. A week later he’s with Selena Gomez in Ibiza. A week after that he’s spotted with Camila Cabello in New York City. The wheel keeps turning, his route through the solar system long and meandering.

Emergency! Aegon texts you one afternoon as you’re sipping hot apple cider at the dining room table and assembling a 500-piece puzzle depicting the sinking of the Titanic.

You know better than to take him too seriously. You reply, in no hurry: ?

Aemond says I can’t hang out with Starbaby unless I stop taking so many drugs?!!?! Fascist?!??!?!?!

Hang out. Like they’ll be going to clubs and Crocs stores together. You grin and reply: I mean yeah, that sounds accurate.

Well fuck, Aegon says. Guess I better start doing those substance abuse education modules again!

On Christmas Eve morning, your parents are at their slightly-less-judgmental replacement church. You are trying out a new recipe in the kitchen: vegan snickerdoodles. The whole house smells like cinnamon and vanilla. Beyond the window over the sink, snow falls in fluffy white bundles like rumpled bedsheets, like clouds. The Australian cattle dogs follow you around hoping for dropped cookies, their claws clicking on the hardwood floor. David Archuleta is singing O Come, All Ye Faithful. You keep bumping into things; you forget how big you are. Your belly seems to grow by the day.

Your iPhone buzzes. It’s a WhatsApp message from Aegon that puzzles you: Hey, I promised I wouldn’t bother you guys for the first few days but I really need the Netflix password and he’s not answering my texts, rude, so could you ask him for it please??? And then a few seconds later: Please. I just really want to watch Grey’s Anatomy.

You stare at his message, not understanding. You reply: Ask who…?

After a moment, Aegon sends back: …Never mind :)

“Really?” you gasp to yourself in the hushed peace of the kitchen, not wanting to believe, not wanting to be disappointed. You peek out the window. Nothing.

You open Google and search Aemond Targaryen. One of the first results is an article from the Kansas City Star published one hour ago. The headline reads: Comet Donati Heartthrob Opens Farm Animal Rescue Outside of Kansas City.

“Oh my God.” You scroll madly, skimming the text. “Oh my God, oh my God.”

One of Aemond’s quotes reads: I wanted to go where the need is. A sanctuary like this in San Francisco or Boston wouldn’t be anything special, wouldn’t be as necessary. But here in Missouri, at the epicenter of industrial animal agriculture in the United States? There’s a lot of important work to be done here. There are a lot of lives I hope to be able to save. We’ve been purchasing animals from auctions and taking in others that have been seized from situations where they were abused or neglected. In addition to our own efforts, I’d like to help launch similar rescues throughout the Midwest, and increase public access to vegan alternatives…

There are photos of him posing with animals: a towering, scarred, ancient mule named Vhagar, a three-legged goat called Sunfyre. In all the pictures, Aemond is smiling. And here in the kitchen of your parents’ farmhouse, so are you. Without thinking, you reach back to touch your fingertips to the black-ink words beneath your Comet Donati crewneck sweatshirt. You hear the lyrics— I’ll come back for you if it kills me, Comets clip by again after eons and so can I—and you know them to be true like space, time, gravity, love.

You look out the window again and he’s here, speeding down the winding path of the driveway, snow dust streaming out behind his Gold Star like the tail of a comet.

[bunnyathy]

my favorite and funny silly headcannons (not rlly) and ooc ideas about the batfamily:

Damian Wayne:

- has a dedicated social media accounts for his pets. he gets income and sponsorship from luxury pet brands all the time because of it. he doesn’t really care about the money he’s just happy his pets get to have free stuff that give them a better and spoiled life.

- bro’s a gen alpha he’s probably a brainrot humor kind of kid but he hides it well but it comes out at random times

- he’s a dedicated hater, he loved kendrick lamar’s drake diss songs

- his personal/ official Damian Wayne tiktok account is literally just a hate page for his brothers (but in an endearing way he still loves them)

- prefers watching reels over tiktok bcs of the funny comments and the unhinged reels that come out there

- Damian Wayne is a weeb… he was absolutely there during the Anime tiktok lockdown era (if he was even born yet idk) so he knows all the cringe weeb shit.. he quotes it at random times….

- Damian was strictly shoujo mangas and anime but Jon showed him My Hero Academia and he LOVED it. he respects Koda and likes his quirk. MHA was one of the only mangas he read that’s not shoujo lol. (lets ignore the part where there was official damian wayne art where there was a chainsaw man manga with him (i dislike csm))

- he probably did one of those kpop pc decora things out of a printed picture of his fave anime character cough bakugo and tamaki suoh cough (he got influenced by flatline nika)

- he most likely listens to Twice bcs Flatline suggested it to him (this is not bcs I am a once (yes it is))

Batfam:

- to be able to keep up with Brucie Wayne’s diva it boy appearance he occasionally does those derma clinic facials and time to time he invites his kids. Stephanie absolutely is always with him, Cass as well but she’s only there because Steph seems to love it so she’ll always do what Steph loves. It came to a point where Tim Drake, Damian Wayne, Dick Grayson, Duke Thomas started to become pretty boys (Jason is not there he could not stand Brucie persona)

- there has been rumors of Brucie Wayne having a bbl and to prove them all wrong Brucie posted a gym workout where his focus was his ass. lets just say BRUCIE JUICY ASS?? on twitter was trending and the kids HATED it. maybe haha certain heroes liked it a little more than others lmfao

- Damian got hyperfixated on into the spiderverse and across the spiderverse he forced his whole family to rewatch it with him

- Jason got asked to come over to the manor by one of the siblings and took a sneaky pic of his whole body just to put it in one of those “dance if you love your family” ai dancing thing on tiktok. he never came back to the manor….

- Tim and Damian have this online feud in tiktok where they comment unhinge and insulting comments to their public official account each other but ofc its filtered so it can cross the tos. Damian once commented “I hope to see you hanging in the streets” and almost got banned from tiktok

- whenever any of the fam asks something from Cass that she doesn’t wanna do she goes “sorry I’m mute” (she takes advantage of her not so disability) Stephanie taught her that she said it would be funny. it works sometimes bcs the other was probably too tired to notice or just goes along bcs they think Cass learning gen Z humor is funny.

aight ive ran out of ideas they were just mostly damian and batfam AHAHAHAH

[cartmankisser]

I GOT YOU FAM!

I'd love a Wally fluff alphabet, please! 🥰

omg ur amazing for linking it. creds for the prompts are linked in pink text of the request!! :)

if you haven’t seen, i ran a poll on my account for what type of personality wally should have and the option that won was, and i quote, “normal wally but… just a little messed up and obsessive.”

so i guess this is like?? mildly yandere wally? haha i’m not sure.. he slowly gets slightly more deranged as this goes on,,

using the small font because these always turn out really long 😭

Activities - “What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?”

— wally isn’t too picky when it comes to hanging out. he’d honestly be content just sitting in silence with you!

in such a small neighborhood, everything is just a few minutes away! it’s not uncommon for you two to take walks around the neighborhood, maybe stopping at howdys shop for snacks before spending the afternoon sitting in a flower-filled field with books and arts and crafts material.

maybe you two could teach each other little crafts you’ve learned over the years!! friendship bracelets, origami, crochet, whatever!!

Beauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

— you’re just such a great friend to him! so caring and kind to him… he always feels calm whenever you’re around, just because of how loving you are!!

most of his uncertainties or insecurities just vanishes whenever he’s with you.. no one else ever could ever make him feel so special! it’s amazing!!!!

Comfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc?

— wally has a hard time picking up on your feelings if you don’t straight up tell him that you’re upset. however, if you’re ever crying or upset, he’d try his best to comfort you!

his go-to comfort methods are usually things that make him happy or calm him down. something like singing a song that barnaby has sung to him before or drawing happy memories to distract you from whatever is making you upset!

he tends to explain to you that he would never make you feel as bad as you do right now. he’s the only one here to comfort you! no one else cares that you’re upset, but he does!! because he loves you!!! :)

Dreams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

— wally dreams of a calm, domestic future with you! he loves his neighborhood and home very dearly, and i don’t see him wanting to move anytime soon (he has no reason to!), but he really can’t wait for you to permanently move in with him! sure, he keeps you at his house for as long as you’re willing to stay, but you still leave him at the end of the day!!!!

home is one of his friends too, and he would never abandon a friend! so hopefully you can get used to living inside of a sentient house.. (no matter how much home scares you)

other than that though, i don’t see him wanting to change too much? you two are already so happy together, so why would anything need to change? all you really need is eachother anyways!!!!

Equal - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

— i think that he thinks you two are equal. i mean, he tries to listen to you, but sometimes you just need his help!!! he believes that a relationship should be built on respect and understanding! dont you respect him? :(

you really should just trust him and know that what he does for you is for the best. he’s not trying to scare or control you or anything!! he’s just trying to keep you safe and happy with him!!! that’s all!!!! :)))

Fight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

— while he might be quick to forgive you, he doesn't easily forget the actions that led to the conflict. he prefers to work through disagreements for a compromise, that way you both can continue to be happy together!! albeit, he tends to be a bit patronizing and condescending when you two disagree on something,,,

he doesn’t get mad at you very often though. i can see him being awfully patient with you when it comes to misunderstandings and such. he knows you don’t mean to be rude about it!! you just need him to explain to you why he’s right!!!

Gratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

— he’s very grateful for you!! he enjoys the admiration, love, and support you show him, and he makes sure to show his appreciation and love back through small gestures, like surprising you with treats or leaving little notes around your house when he visits! that way, you’re always thinking about how much he loves and appreciates you!

Honesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

— wally values honesty in the relationship and doesn’t feel the need to keep secrets from you unless they would hurt you. and he knows you wouldn’t dare keep anything from him. not if you truly loved him, that is..

he doesn’t really understand secrets that much anyways.. everyone in the neighborhood is such good friends, why would they need to hide anything? (aka, wally unintentionally talks shit and causes drama /hj)

Inspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

— you’ve definitely inspired him to try out new mediums and techniques in his art. i mean, he usually just paints and draws things he likes! and there’s nothing wrong with that, but recently he’s been trying new things!

with you around to help, he’s rarely hit any creative blocks. you’ve shown him how to connect his emotions to his paintings. and now he knows even more ways to make art that is more than just color on paper!!! truly amazing :)!!

Jealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

— wally is quite possessive and can get jealous easily. he deals with it by keeping a close eye on you, and if he perceives any threat to his relationship, he will go to great lengths to eliminate that threat.

he would never destroy something that means a lot to you, but of course, he has to make sure he means the most to you!!! after everything he does for you, how could you not love him more than anything else!?! :)

Kiss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

— i love him a lot okay? but he is definitely not a good kisser. he’s never loved anyone like he’s loved you, so he’s just… inexperienced?

i feel like the first kiss would be awkward and tense, as he was nervous and unsure of how you would react to his feelings, but it was still very passionate and meaningful! sometimes you just take his breath away and leave him speechless, but actions speak more than words, right? @:))))

Love Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

— he would confess his love in a very straightforward and direct manner. he would likely sit you down and tell you about how he couldn't imagine his life without you, and that hes willing to do anything to make you happy!!!

he was confident and direct with his confession because he was sure that he had you wrapped around his finger. before he confessed to you, he made sure to be open enough that you’d enjoy talking to him, but mysterious enough that you’d surely be thinking about him all day, wanting to hear more from him.

Marriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

— he does want to get married, and he would propose in a grand, romantic way!! he would likely plan an elaborate surprise, such as a candlelit dinner or a sweet picnic in a meadow, and then get down on one knee to ask you to marry him!! he would make sure the moment was so special that there was no chance that you could reject him!

the marriage itself would be pretty traditional, with wally insisting on taking care of all the arrangements and ensuring that everything was perfect for you.

Nicknames - What do they call their s/o?

— i feel like he would call you things such as "my love" or "my darling," and he would use petnames often to remind you how much he adores you!

he has a habit of calling you a handful of different petnames, but always adding “my“ to the beginning of it. you’re his sweetheart!!!! his love!!!!! no one else’s!!!!!!

On Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

— when wally falls in love, he becomes completely devoted to you. his feelings are somewhat obvious to others, as he can become a bit possessive and jealous when others try to get too close to you, even though he tries to hide those feelings in front of others.

he expresses his love through attention and gifts, showering his significant other with affection and making sure they know how much they truly mean to him!!!!

PDA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

— he’s pretty upfront about his relationship and is not afraid to show affection in public. he enjoys making others aware of you two and he takes pride in displaying his love for you!!!!

he’s not the type to like??? shove his tongue down your throat in public 😭 but i mean small things like holding your hand and keeping you close to him when you two are out together!!

Quirk - Some random ability they have that's beneficial in a relationship.

— wally has a photographic memory, which makes him incredibly attentive to your wants and desires. he never forgets important dates or details, and always makes sure to surprise you with things that make you happy!!

he knows what size clothes you wear and what scent perfume you use. he always picks up your favorite snacks before you come over and he makes sure to use your favorite colors a lot when he makes paintings for you!!!

Romance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

— i feel like he’d be pretty romantic!! and he loves to make grand gestures to make you feel special!! i like to think he’s somewhat creative in his approach and he enjoys surprising you with things you never expected.

he will go to great lengths to make you happy, even if it means doing something cliché like writing love letters or preparing a candlelit dinner. however, his possessiveness can sometimes lead to darker and more dangerous displays of love, such as stalking or isolating you from others.

Support - Are they helping their s/o achieve their? Do they believe in them?

— wally sees himself as your personal cheerleader and will do anything to help you achieve your dreams. however, his version of support can be a little intense as sometimes he tends to control your choices to ensure your success. he believes in you so much that he'll go to extreme measures to make sure you reach your full potential.

i feel like he would also be sure to tell you that you two achieved the victory together and that you wouldn’t have gotten to where you are without him!! he doesn’t mean it in a rude way!!!!! he just wants you to thank him sometimes!!!!!

Thrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

— i think that he wouldn’t mind trying out new things with you sometimes, but only if it's on his terms! he has a certain routine that he likes to follow, and deviation from it can trigger his possessive behavior a bit...

he's very particular about what he considers "spicing things up" and can tend to be a bit controlling when it comes to decision-making. he just wants to make sure you stay nice and safe!!! he makes sure to take good care of his belongings! :)

Understanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

— he believes that he knows you better than anyone else, and as such, he can be highly empathetic when it suits him... however, he's also prone to getting lost in his own delusions and can struggle to see things from your perspective when he feels threatened.

mostly though, he tends to be more sympathetic and pitiful instead of empathetic whenever you’re upset.

Value - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

— the relationship is everything to him!!! and he's not afraid to make that known! he has a bad habit of seeing you as his property and will stop at nothing to keep you by his side. in his eyes, the relationship is worth more than anything else in his life, and he'll do whatever it takes to protect it!!! you truly mean everything him, and he’s not afraid to give everything else up for you!!!! :)

Wild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

— wally loves to pamper you with expensive gifts and lavish attention. he believes that he deserves your love and affection in return for the gifts and he sees them as a way of showing you how much he cares!

XOXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

— he is extremely affectionate and loves to shower you with cuddles and affection. however, sometimes it tends to turn into a bit of possessive behavior if he feels like someone else is encroaching on your time together.

Yearning - How will they cope when they're missing their partner?

— whenever he’s missing you, i feel like he copes by somewhat obsessing over you... he'll stare over old photos and drawings, collecting small things you might’ve left at his house, overanalyzing them until he can almost feel your presence.

he also might engage in stalkerish behavior,,, staring at your house through his window.. maybe even walking to your place to peek through the windows if he thinks he can get away with it.

Zeal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

— he’s willing to go to great lengths for the relationship, even if it might seem hurtful from your perspective... he tends to see himself as your companion and protector and will stop at nothing to keep you safe, even if it means resorting to things you might not like. his zeal can quickly turn dangerous if he feels that you’re in danger.

[searchingforakeythatdoesntexist]

It started as it will end, with a garden with this post -> link

"Stuntman / Stuntwoman / Stuntperson: a person employed to take an actor's place in performing dangerous stunts on purpose"

Day 12 : “Funnier my way” - Good Omens, Gymnast/StuntPerson AU

Aziraphale *angry*: You're being silly! Hurting yourself like this...

Crowley *pouty*: Naaah. Stunt person, that's what I am!

Aziraphale: Well, Dear, it is dangerous. *sigh*

Crowley: *sigh loudly* It's not if you're doing it professionaly. And I am. Very professional. Me.

Aziraphale: ...

Crowley: ...

Aziraphale *kindly*: Does it still hurt?

Crowley *softly*: ...Yeah. Still hurts. But doing it my way is funnier, Angel.

[Previous] [Next Day] [First Day]

Don't forget to 💕/ reblog ;-)

Personal challenge: a simple sketch each day

Goal: forcing me to keep things simple - inking, shading, just a few sashes of colour

Improvement pursued: to get the movement, the emotion, finding how to add depth, learning how to leave things barely finished

Max time allowed: 2 hours instead of 8-20 on my previous projects - well, 2 hours for the complete sketch, then 1 more hour for editing their lovely quotes - AND drawing the Minisnake!Crowley.

Today's theme chosen by me: Well, this time it definitely feels like it's the theme that HAS CHOSEN me. I was scrolling on Tumblr and found this old "Gymnast Vs Stuntwoman" video I have already seen on YouTube months ago. But my GO-rotten brain made me think "WOAAA this is splendid AziraCrow Arrangement's vibes, doesn't it'". Aaaand... Voilà.

Trivia: when I started this Challenge, I wasn't very comfortable with Aziraphale soft curves - partly because I always tried to draw unrealistic bodies and "healthy" (whatever that means) silhouettes, and partly because it reminds me of my own bigger roundnesses and I can't stop feeling ashamed about it. But now I like to draw realistic Aziraphale more and more, sometimes plushy, sometimes a little bit more muscular (you'll see it in my future Ice Skating Tribute). It is a long road for me, but I like it a little more each day .

Trivia2: I love so much their wings tattoos. And I am particularly proud of the winged-sword because when I imagined it, it only took 10 minutes doing it. I am having so much fun in this Challenge, because I don't have time to think or hesitate. It's very refreshing for an indecisive and perfectionist artist like me.

How did it start? I reblogged here but my brain didn't want to stop...

"Hey, Good Omens Fam, listen, listen.

Is it just my Good-Omens-rotting brain speaking, or there is some Aziraphale/Crowley's Arrangement vibes here?

Feels like a kind of funny Fem!AU to me...

Aziraphale: If I may? *performs their gymnastic routine with a perfect sense of timing, beautiful and powerful, everything is neat, calculated, an rightful Angel in disguise with their sculptural body and their lovely blond curls*

Crowley: My turn. *performs the exact same gymnastic routine with an almost-perfect sense of timing, failling clumsy and weirdly sensual, everything seems chaotic but it IS (?) calculated, an bloody Demon in disguise with their messy gestures and their red disheveled long hair*

Aziraphale: ...

Crowley: WOT? Job done!

Aziraphale, *sincerely concerned* : Mate, didn't you just hurt yourself on this last jump?

Crowley, *blushing*: Ha! No way. I am a professional. Very professional, me.

Aziraphale: ... ... .... *raise eyebrows*

Crowley, *blushing A LOT*: ...Yeah. Still hurts. But my way is funnier, Angel.

Aziraphale: Oh dear. 🥺🙄😌"

And YES, the stuntwoman dit it ON PURPOSE - almost of it. See for yourself, they are so lovely, having so much fun together.

[gilbirda]

This mostly stemmed from the constant image of Jason being so disgustingly enamored with Jazz [the twirling-his-hair-heart-eyes-and-being so-unfocused-on-important-shit lovesick] that the batfam finds it bizarre rather than cute

The most I got is Ember rolling into Gotham looking for a bigger crowd [I guess], Jazz, interning at Arkham as the popular saying goes, tries dealing with her and Jason obviously steps in cause Crime Alley business is his business and smth about this new rocker chicks smells fishy.

I'm guessing you know where this is going?

Ember gets away, off to collect a following as she does.

Jazz is prepared for ghost nonsense, but she was not prepared for this vigilant built like a brick house to suddenly be mooning over her. So she reluctantly knocks this guy's lights out and leaves him in some alley [maybe checks him over for what she hopes is a panic button and leaves the bats to it]

The bats find him and bring him home, and thus have to deal with their uncharacteristically goofy, lovestruck family member going on and on about some redhead. He's talking about her long pretty hair, the color of her eyes, the way she kicked ass, her bossiness.

They can't get anything useful out of him.

It's both sickening and blackmail worthy

Cue batfam looking into the whole Ember business all while trying to keep Jason from wandering off in search of Jazz and keep him from potentially exposing himself or embarrassing himself. Meanwhile, Jazz is also trying to deal with Ember and maybe calling in the big guns....

Cue flustered Jazz having some weird ass run-ins with the bats and watching them as they try to keep an embarrassingly enamored Red Hood in check [The dude is probably singing her sonnets and all sorts of romantic shit]

[He refused to stay home, he wanted the chance to see her]

Hmmm, not much room to figure out a route for potential romance there :p

FAM

I THINK YOU HAVE A WHOLE ASS FIC RIGHT THERE

I would read it!!!

I mean, Jazz could acknowledge that this stranger is under a spell and doesn't really like, like her, so she's understanding and kind?

She still needs to deal with the ghost situation without Batman knowing what really is going on, so she has to outsmart the bats while she outruns this guy that's reciting very cute poetry oh my god he should write it down and publish it! and defeat Ember on her own.

She calls the big guns. She is strong, but she knows when she's overwhelmed.

Team Phantom deals with Ember as she deals with the bats. After all, she needs to make herself a distraction from the whole ghost-is-mind-controlling-people, and they are following her anyway, so she just-

she leaves fake clues?

It's actually really fun!!! She has taken a support role when helping her brother, and spreading her wings like this, running around the city at night and testing the limits of her liminal abilities, IS FUN.

And the guy, he said his name was Jay but she stopped him before he could say more, is actually very fun to talk to. When she is caught by him before the others and they get to interact, she sits down and studies him and what he uses to romance - it strikes her that he can quote plays and books at the drop of a hat (that is not the spell, this guy legit has memorized those) and that he is actually very polite?

Spell or no spell, it's been a while since she talked to someone like this. Nerding out.

But then Ember is defeated and the spell is broken and she is bummed that it's over but hey, it's been a fun experience!

And this dude remembers what happened too? He is very sorry and she assures him that it's totally fine and that he didn't say anything compromising about his identity.

And so they go back to their normal lives

except-

she misses him? It was fun and it was all a spell, but she misses him. It's silly, because there's no way a whole ass vigilante with probably a busy life is interested in silly romance?

And then this guy finds her one time as she was going home. He's just checking on her, really, because it must have been stressing dealing with all of that. He says he is sorry about being clingy and, well, she's been cool about it but wanted to make sure it was all fine.

He's being nice, she thinks.

He asks her if it could be cool to keep in touch. Because, uh, books? He wanted to know more about that theory she mentioned and maybe when they had a free schedule she wanted to grab a drink?

Yeah, sure. She gives him her number. How else would he contact her? By being a creep and stalk her to her house? No thank you.

And that's how Jazz ends up being courted by a Bat and doesn't realize what's going on.

Yes I hc her as aspec, what about it

-----

OOF

THIS GOT OUT OF MY HANDS!

If anyone wants to add, go ahead!

[house-of-slayterr]

X-Men & Bat/Super Fam Incorrect Quotes:

Superman : We should get you to a doctor for a check up immediately. What if it happens again, and there isn’t anyone around to help you? What if it’s congenital? Oh my God! Was it me? Did I hurt you?

Y/N : …You realize any other person that made their partner pass out on bed would simply feel really proud of themselves, right?

Y/n : So what are your political beliefs?

Jason: awkwardly trying to impress them: Well, I think Pikachu would be a lot more powerful if he had a gun.

Batman : Robin , why are you crying?

Dick : This book is so sad!!

Batman , picking it up: But this is my diary-

Charles : Hey Jean, wanna third wheel on my date with Erik tomorrow?

Jean: Sure.

Charles : Storm ! Wanna third wheel on my date with Erik tomorrow?

Charles : Great! I've always wanted to go on a double date!

Jean & Storm : ...

Erik : Charles ...

Jean: I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter “s”.

Storm : *looks over at Erik and Charles * Storm : Is it “sexual tension”?

Rogue : You know, Bansheee gives Hank flowers everyday, I wish you'd do that too.

Gambit : Okay.

*Later*

Gambit : *gives Hank flowers*

Hank : ???

Gambit : I don't know, I'm confused as well.

Rogue : Hank , you'll be working with Bansheee and Gambit .

Hank : Alright! My fantasy threesome!

Everyone else: *blank stares*

Hank : ...Of people on a team.

Jubilee : Why are your tongues purple?

Pyro : We had slushies. I had a blue one.

Bobby : I had a red one.

Jubilee : oh.

Jubilee :

Jubilee : OH.

Kitty :

Kitty : You drank eachothers slushies?

Jean : So… I’ve seen you’ve been spending a lot of time with Logan recently.

Scott : No, Jean , it's not what it looks like, I swear.

Jean : Oh really? So no reason for me to be jealous?

Scott : No! You’re the only one for me.

Jean : Is that so?

Scott : I promise! Logan and I are just dating, okay? They’re my partner.

Jean : So there are no best-friends-feelings involved?

Scott : You are still my one and only best friend! They’re just the love of my life, nothing more!

Jean : But I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?

Scott : Of course bro!

Jean : Bro...

Logan : What the-

Logan : Is there a cactus where your heart should be?

Jean : What’s up your ass this morning!

Scott : *walks in* ...Hey.

Jean : Hmm… nevermind.

Logan : WAIT NO!

Damian : How do Jason and Tim usually get out of these messes?

Dick : They don't. They just make a bigger mess that cancels the first one out.

Damian : *running into the room* Dick just said they don’t love me anymore!

Tim: What?!

Dick : *following him in* I did not say that. I just said that we are not driving all the way across the country just so you can punch Jason in the face.

Damian : Good night.

Dick : Sleep tight.

Jason : Don't let the bedbugs crawl up to your ear and whisper threatening things that make you question yourself.

Tim: Great, now Dick 's crying.

Jason : Why are you smiling?

Kon : What? I can’t just be happy?

Damian : Jon tripped and fell in the parking lot.

Jason , to Jon: When was the last time you let someone hug you?

Jon: *thinking*

Jon: 2012.

Kon : 2012…?

Jon: Yeah. I almost died and it really freaked Damian out so I let them hug me.

Damian , carrying a box: What would you say if- if I, hypothetically, came home with 7 kittens one day?

Jon: …

Jon: What’s in the box?

Damian : What woul-

Jon: Damian , what’s in the box?

Damian : I think you know.

Bonus Villains:

Crane : I sleep with a gun under my pillow.

Ed : I sleep with a knife.

Harley : Both of you are pathetic.

Crane : Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?

Harley : Ivy .

Harley : HYDRATE OR DIE-DRATE!

Harley : *aggressively throws water bottles*

Ed : Uh... what's up with them?

Crane : They're trying to yell mental health and wellbeing into us.

Harley : I APPRECIATE ALL OF YOU!

Ivy , crying: It's working.

Oz, with a headache: Advil me up, daddy.

Ed : I will short out the language centre of your brain if you say anything like that ever again.

Ed : We have a problem.

Oz: No, YOU have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps making them.

Y/n: You have to apologize to them Crane .

Crane : Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!

Y/n: *angrily presses Crane against a wall* WHERE'S THE MONEY?!

Crane : ...

Crane : Are we about to kiss-

Joker : Lex , I need some advice.

Lex : You need advice from ME?

Joker : Yeah, frightening, isn't it?

Lex : I haven’t lost my virginity.

Joker : Because you have no friends?

Lex : No... because I never lose!

*At a speed dating event*

Joker : Oh wow, people are really shallow.

y/n : Consider it a background check. For example: Do you have a death certificate?

Joker : *Checks their pulse* Sorry, not yet.

y/n : Good, I'm not fucking a ghost again.

Bonus to the Bonus: + Wade

Y/N: All in all, a 100% successful trip.

Logan : But we lost Wade .

Y/N: All in all, a 100% successful trip!

Logan : Thank you all for coming.

Wade , wearing a hospital gown: When I heard you couldn't get laid, I dropped everything and came straight here.

Logan : Well, I couldn't imagine anyone else being part of the "Fuck Logan Task Force".

Y/N: Yeah, I interpreted that in a different way.

Logan : Come on, Wade . Nobody actually believes that Y/N is in love with me.

Wade , to The Squad: Raise your hand if you think that Y/N is helplessly in love with Logan .

*Everyone raises their hand*

Logan : Y/N, put your hand down.

Tag: @oceansrose2002 @kados-of-chaos @mothmans-kingdom @myers-meadow

[todayisafridaynight]

Sorry for ruining your posting kfjdj I also didn't know such a person existed but I ended up finding the post where they defended him because it was the same one in which they said they hated Park cos she was abusive and manipulative to Haruka 😭😭 like. The dissonance between what they can't accept and what they CAN just cos they find a guy hot really gets me

OH NO YOU'RE GOOD THE TIMING WAS JUST REALLY FUNNY the halo effect and misogyny can hold grimy ugly hands unfortunately

oh damn i aint readin all that. i skimmed it just for you but if i read it any more i was gonna feel my eyebrows merge as i pinched them together perplexed

[distinguishedwitchparadise]

Main Six Incorrect Generated Quotes

Gov, rubbing their temples: I am not proud of what I am about to say, but someone get me a cigarrette.

Texas: But Gov, we don't smoke.

Gov: Cut the crap, Texas. I'm not an idiot. I know that one in five people smoke.

Gov: *points at california * One! *points at New York * Two! *points at louisiana* Three! *points at Florida* Four! *points at Texas* Five!

Gov: Now, I am going to close my eyes, and when I open them, there better be a cigarrette between these two fingers!

Florida: *puts a cigarrette in Gov's hand*

Gov: Thank you. ...Light?

The Squad: *all simultaneously pull out lighters*

Gov: I CAN'T DO IT!

New York , laughing: I CAN'T EITHER!

Gov: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE

louisiana: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US.

Gov:

Gov: I appreciate it,

Gov: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH-

california: Gov-

Gov: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE!

Texas: Gov we gotta-

Gov: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND.YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT.

Gov: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?'

Gov, motioning to Florida : NOT FUCKING THIS

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*

Gov: So.Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.

Everyone:

california : ...I did.I broke it.

Gov: No.No you didn't. louisiana?

louisiana: Don't look at me. Look at Texas.

Texas: What ? !I didn't break it.

louisiana: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

Texas: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

louisiana: Suspicious.

Texas: No, it's not!

Florida : If it matters, probably not, but California was the last one to use it.

California: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

Florida : Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

California: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles.Everyone knows that, Florida !

New York : Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Gov.

Gov: No! Who broke it!?

Everyone:

california : Gov...louisiana's been awfully quiet.

louisiana: REALLY?!

*Everyone starts arguing*

Gov, being interviewed: I broke it.I burned my hand so I punched it.

Gov: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

Gov:

Gov: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

*Squad reactions to being told 'I love you'*

Louisiana: Thanks fam!

Gov: Oh no.

Texas: *cries* I love you too.

New York: Sounds fake, but okay.

california: *A flustered mess*

New York : Can I get a refund?

Gov: Croissants: dropped

New York : Road: works ahead

louisiana: BBQ sauce: on my titties

Florida: Shavacado: fre

Texas: Miss Keisha: fuckin dead

california :

california , grumpy: I didn't understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.

Gov: Just be yourself.

california :Really ? Gov, I have one day to win over New York's parents.

california : How long did it take for you guys to like me?

louisiana: Couple of weeks.

Florida : Six months.

Texas: Jury's still out.

California : See Gov? 'Just be yourself,' what kind of garbage advice is that?!

Gov: You know, when Texas comes over, Florida can get a little…

New York : Psycho?

louisiana: Scary?

california : Drunk?

Gov: All three.

Gov: *Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat*

New York : If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I'd have 15 cents

Gov: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you

california: Actually I did the math, New York would have $225, not $0.15.

New York : Fam I'm right here....

Florida: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :)

Gov: while you're there could you buy me an apply juice please?

Florida: Sorry I only have a dollar

Gov: :(

california: Hey I just realized my friend is right, New York would have $22, 500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent

Florida: If I had $22, 500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice

louisiana: You can buy anything you want with $22, 500

Texas: Yeah and they want soda and apply juice

louisiana: Apply juice to what

california : Directly to the forehead

Gov: Great chat everyone

[st4rrmii]

The People have Spoken, here are my absolutely Baseless Ben Headcanons

(Cut because theres a lot)

-Has lower back dimples

-Is generally a "Will listen to anything" person, he started as a lil hater but eventually caved and realized that being a hater isn't fun (sometimes)

-Had a bunny growing up named Freckles

-His comfort food is his mom's homemade lasagna, she's make it for him whenever he had a bad day and it always makes him feel better

-Started going to public school after getting back to the mainland, but didn't really make any new friends because he was a hisser

-Can't grow facial hair, like the odd times he gets a stray hair but he's never been able to grow a proper beard or even mustache

-Not used to his height like, at all. Consistantly smacking his head on things.

-One of his favourite artists is Michael Jackson, and his favourite song is Dirty Diana

-Went for like a year with no clothes that fit him after his growth spurt, had maybe 2 pairs of pants he filtered through and any shirts he had fit him like a crop top. Brooklynn eventually caved and took him shopping for more clothes.

-Can secretly actually sing but like no one knows because whenever he sings in front of anyone its just for fun and therefore not his best work

-really good at chess???

-has freckles like everywhere, didn't have as many pre-nublar but they got 'worse' after the island due to the sun

-has a birth mark on his right hip that looks like a malformed heart

-(stealing this from a moot) likes bug shaped food like gummy worms and such

-Will eat out of a boot but won't touch vegetables with a ten foot pole

-The first time he broke a bone was after he got back to mainland and was playing with Bumpy, she knocked him down and he landed wrong and broke his pinky. Sammy does not let him live this down, ever.

-Daddy issues

-Can deal with bugs but has major arachnophobia, will freak out over a tiny spider. Would be horrendously fucked if Wu decided to make giant spiders.

-Spends a lot of time on his hair

-Used to be a mattress on the floor type of guy, luckily his dorm had a proper bed with a frame when he moved in (though prefers the floor mattress, tbh)

-Diagnosis cocktail I fear

-Gotten a little better at drawing with Yaz's help, though only at drawing dinosaurs, still not great at drawing humans

-Tried going to a bar with college friends for his 21st birthday, left the second an older woman started flirting with him

-has mimicking stims, will mimic things other people say or quotes he hears, was stuck saying "Ugh, as if" for months after Brooklynn made him watch clueless

-Says he's good with scary things but is the friend that clings onto whoever hes closest to in haunted houses

-Learned how to use a gun after nublar, doesn't carry or anything but he does have that skill in his back pocket if necessary

-Will buy literally anything that reminds him of Bumpy

-Terrible texter. Like absolutely ass.

-needs sound to sleep, as well as at least a little bit of light

-Sucks at math tbh

-Is the only one of the camp fam who's still ticklish, which makes him very vulnerable at times

-Lowkey king of puppy eyes

[blacksailskmeme]

Black Sails Kink Meme 2024 Round Up: May-June

Hi there pirate fam!

As of today the Kink Meme has collected 130 prompts and 26 fills! Wow!!! 🥳🥳

As I said, I’ve decided to do a round up post for each month the kink meme is live, showcasing those fills submitted to the collection monthly.

We skipped a separate May roundup because things had quieted down for a bit, but in June y'all popped right back up! Happy Hot Kink Meme Summer, we'll be here all of July as well, accepting prompts and fills alike! ☀️☀️

Here ya go: all the fics submitted in May and June gathered in one place for your convenience and enjoyment! ✨

--

Flames of Desire By John Silver, SilverFlint, 4183 words

(For PROMPT #71: silver pre series writes filthy rpf of him and captain flint (think kidnapped by the pirate styles bodice rippers) and then he actually ends up kidnapped by flint and tries to seduce him bc of course he does and flint Resists but silver keeps throwing himself at flint until he finally gives in 😈)

-

Flavor, SilverFlint, 4088 words

(For PROMPT #72: s3-s4 break, Silver likes how Flint smells sweaty and ripe after they do sword drills on the cliffs, so he keeps distracting with questions or bullshit ship tasks Flint after training so that he doesn't have time to wash up before his other meetings. culminating in flint clocking what's he's doing, getting fed up, and making Silver give him a tonguebath one morning. Copious sweat and armpit hair licking is a MUST.)

-

Recipe For Disaster, Silverflint; Silver/Others, 5655 words

(For PROMPT #50: Bad Cook Silver accidentally aphrodisiac poisons the crew. Take it any direction you want, but my idea is that he buys a sketchy potion in a port somewhere, planning to put it in Flint's food because he wants Flint to be helplessly attracted to him for manipulation/blackmail reasons. However through shenanigans, it ends up getting added to everyone's food BUT Flint and, oh no! the whole crew is horny for Silver. Flint, who did NOT get dosed (but maybe thinks he did?) has feelings about this.)

-

For Her, FlintMadi, 1433 words

(For PROMPT #26: Madi is eaten out while menstruating. Dealer's choice who is slurping her up, could be multiples)

-

Enter Leviathan, Silver/Sea Monster; SilverFlint, 2742 words

(For PROMPT #4: The War Ship is guarded by more than men. They have somehow captured a sea creature and are keeping it under decks. It gets loose during the interrogation, and Flint (still tied to the chair) watches as Silver gets tentacle fucked into oblivion.)

-

first prize, SilverFlint, Silver/Others, 4088 words

(For PROMPT #94: some sort of s1/2 au. Flint is fucking Silver, but sometimes he lets a chosen few members of his crew have a go at Silver if they did well on a raid. Lending and voyeurism (Flint watches), Silver feels a mix of humiliation from being used like this and weird messed up pride from being such a Prized Possession that he's being given to people as a prize)

-

Bot Love, FlintHam; SilverFlintHam, 5293 words

(For PROMPT #84: Inspired by the porn bots flooding the tumblr black sails tag. Modern AU. POV James. Thomas uses tumblr because he runs an account posting about bawdy quotes from poems/classics. James thinks it's ridiculous (social media at all, that is). One day he looks over Thomas's shoulder and sees such a porny advertise (something along the tacky line of "who wants to play with my cute butt") featuring a picture of Silver or well, parts of his body, in a tantalizing position. Thomas realises that James is very very turned on by it (James is angry about being turned on but damn, that's a really nice ass) and clicks the link. This is followed by a steamy video chat with Silver fucking himself with a huge dildo on his bed. Meanwhile, Thomas gives James a handjob or blowjob or... more (your choice). Bonus points if Thomas pays Silver a very generous tip in the end and if they end up exchanging contact details for a meeting in person (Silver, a poor student, sees his chance to become the sugar baby to these two obviously very rich and hot couple)

-

Close Combat, Miranda/Anne, 3261 words

(For PROMPT #117: Miranda and Anne fight sex :) maybe a Miranda lives au or just set sometime in s1 or 2, but Miranda decides she wants to learn how to fight. flints fight style doesn't work for a thin woman, and Miranda hears about how skilled and feared Anne bonny is, so she seeks her out for training. during the course of the training, the sexual tension grows and then breaks and they have nasty rough sex on the ground - something neither of them could get with flint or max who love them too much to be rough nd dirty with them)

-

Captain's Treasure, SilverFlint; Silver/Others, 1883 words

(For PROMPT #94: some sort of s1/2 au. Flint is fucking Silver, but sometimes he lets a chosen few members of his crew have a go at Silver if they did well on a raid. Lending and voyeurism (Flint watches), Silver feels a mix of humiliation from being used like this and weird messed up pride from being such a Prized Possession that he's being given to people as a prize)

-

Thanks again to all of our May and June contributors! Here’s to more unapologetically smutty, kinky fills for July~~ 🥳🥳

[quitealotofsodapop]

More incorrect quotes from the delightful @justweirddino

Organising these in a set so I respond to all of them, also I have the transcripts in the image descriptions.

Oh gosh so many to react to /pos

Macaque spent a lot of time either on the moon, in the Jade Palace, or in the wilds. He thinks Wukong's sense of enviromental hygiene is appaling for a monkey with his own treasury. Is def the one of the pair who starts organising/tidying up anywhere they go. Pigsy starts yelling like Gordon Ramsey if there's any mess in the kitchen or pantry area - chef habits.

2. Nezha mentions that he's part lotus around Sandy, and the big blue softy cant bring himself to eat lotus roots ever again. Wukong stayed vegan for a long time, but sometimes a monkey needs some protein. Macaque meanwhile has infact eaten other sapient beings, granted if they were already dead.

3. MK whenever they have to go somewhere vaguelly horrifying; "This Is fine." :) Can't wait till this little guy stumbles into Diyu.

4. Nezha holds the family braincell whenever Pigsy isn't available. I love how it's 100% in all their characters; Macaque would be the type to steal a car if it helped with the situation (no matter how petty). Wukong does not fear personal injury. And MK is basically a trash disposal unit when it comes to materials.

5. Wukong is 100% a "if my knee is gonna give me chronic pain, just amputate the leg"-kinda guy. Probably thinks its acceptable to take out your body parts for maintenace. He legit jokes about it during a Jttw chapter where he has to gut himself to show up some taoist priests.

6. Pigsy. Family braincell holder, and very tired of Wukong's nonsense.

7. It took Mei and MK a while to question anything in the TMKATI au. Mei chalked her comparatively dark complexion up to Macaque or Tang, and the scales and fire to whatever Big Bro Nezha was. Kid logic. There was def a period of time where Mei just knew she wa adopted, but the parents hadn't broken the news to her yet. It was an awkward conversation.

8. Erlang is stress incarnate. That third eye gives him images he does not want to see. Just radiates stress like a salt lamp. XD

9. Tbf we are talking about a manipulative murder monkey. MK introduces anyone to Macaque and it's like;

10. I don't know why, but I adore the idea of the Spider Gang post-S3 joining up with Red and the Demon Bull fam. Red probably admires Syntax's programming skills on the Spider-Bots, and offers him a job maintaining the Bull Clones... but DBK and Red are still a bit sore from New Years so they don't 100% trust or respect the spiders just yet. XD

Ty so much for sending these in! These weer really fun to read and to think about.